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owladaptive · 6 months

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Headcanons of your latest art, plz

The cool and funny thing about the addams au is that ducks don't need to change their core personalities in the slightest in order to fit. They're all just kinda Like That already.

They're just Like That already!!

They already get up to wacky, dangerous shenanigans. And other people not in the family look at it and go "that's a whole lotta weird". Individually, none of them are exactly normal.

All you really need to do to addamsify them is to take the most out of the ordinary aspects of each of their personalities and dial the notch up about..... 60 degrees.

Below are ramblings about their characters. Enjoy.

Scrooge is of course the patriarch of the family, an adventure capitalist and the richest duck in the world who loves dancing with danger. He's basically the most unchanged out of them all. But this Scrooge is... twisted. He covets the thrill of almost dying with the same fervor he covets gold. And he proudly, nay lovingly, exposes his kids to anything that brings them near the glory of death with reverence. The "other bin" is a personal museum of deadly monsters, fatal curses and dead things that he proudly lets his beloved family (and hapless guests) admire at their leisure. And he's always delighted to teach his kids anything they want to know. How to swordfight? Of course m'dear child, anything you ask. Here's the correct way you load gunpowder into a musket. Here's a fun way to give your wind-up clock bomb a little extra oomph. Want a turn in the iron maiden?

Bentina was a whole different kind of spy. I mean she was an assassin. In fact she was hired to string up Scrooge when they first met, instead he bought her off and had her dispose of her original contractor. They became friends of course, Scrooge admiring her line of work and Beakley begrudgingly respecting the sheer outrageousness of his admiration. And since coming back to his house to raise Webby (his family-oriented nature wore her cold exterior down over time until she caught the love bug) she vibes as his pseudo-sister once more.

Yeah Duckworth is still a ghost. He's been there since he died in his sleep and the whole family got together to drag his fading soul from the river styx and shove him back into the physical plain. (They worship the escape of death, that doesn't mean they want to be separated!) He doesn't say much. They love him still.

Webby is literally the same character. Only of course, her already-warped perspective on life after growing up in the shadow of Scrooge McDuck is warped all the more. To Webby, fighting, grappling, shooting arrows, firing (real) guns and stalking your friends through the shadows of night to scare the light from their eyes for a second isn't just super fun.... it's affection!! She's a creature of the night. She'll give her family so many hugs. She'll watch her loved ones while they sleep. She'll strangle them until they pass out (affectionate), she'll protect them from anything. She's everything the rest of the world is just ken.

Della is presumed dead, and nobody is particularly mad about it. This is a family that walks closely with death, after all, so while their love for each other is so strong that even a decade after she was gone they still mourn her, they would never cut her memory from their lives. Her portraits hang everywhere, her room kept immaculately covered in dust and cobwebs just the way she'd want it to be. They bring her up in conversations as though she'd just gone out to buy milk or something. And every single year, on the anniversary of her death, they hold a seance to attempt to summon her back (They already tried the thing they did with Duckworth). It never works, and Scrooge and Donald hug and cry and reminisce together and then life goes back to normal.

Donald is a faithful, doting and affectionate dad to his nephews and has told them stories of their mother since they were hatched. He loved his sister so very much, but unlike canon never blamed Scrooge for her death. Yes, she likely died in space, her spacesuit smashed open and her body freeze dried in the soul-sucking endless darkness all because Scrooge lovingly gifted her something that would put her life at risk. But she's only dead!! Nothing to estrange yourself from your family over. Donald and Scrooge are instead brought closer through shared loss. Donald in this universe is still a sailor, and is entranced by the glory of the deathly, stormy seas and all the creepy, slimy creatures within it. His anger is surprisingly mostly tamed by way of catharsis (fishing and killing the fish and cooking the fish with far too much axe chopping and knife brandishing than needed). That doesn't mean he won't lose it if someone insults his kids, his uncle or his dead sister.

Huey is a sweet, smart, helpful boy with a penchant for biting that's followed him since he first grew teeth and a rage-filled alter ego that's switched on a hair-thin trigger. When he's not flying into a mad frenzy like a gremlin ("you've got such a healthy temper dear boy, make sure to sharpen your teeth before bed now!") he's deconstructing anything he can get his hands on and building them back better and more explosive. Don't be alarmed by his muzzle - his brothers sometimes force it on him when they get tired of his biting (it makes for an unfair fight) and sometimes they kindly ask if he wants them to put it on for him when they notice he's being a little nonverbal or cranky. He loves them a lot and gives them lots of hugs.

Dewey is a melodramatic little weirdo who recites poetry and Shakespeare, adores making a spectacle of himself and hates being one of a set of three. Quite like his canon self! Unlike his canon self, he copes with feelings of resentment and middle child syndrome by way of bloodlust. It's all in good fun, of course. What child doesn't try to smother their siblings in their sleep now and then? Why, back when Scrooge was a lad, his sisters once dangled him in the path of a speeding train while he was sleeping! When his murderous urges take a backseat and he gives the booby traps a rest, Dewey's a fun-loving kid who would go to much more extreme measures to get take vicious revenge on anyone who would make any three of his siblings cry. His dream is to die suffocating in a vacuum like his mother did.

Louie, having grown up in the mansion instead of a houseboat, is no stranger to the wonders of luxury. Luckily for him, the Scrooge of this universe is wrapped around the collective pinky finger of his wee ones, and is much more doting than canon. Also luckily for Louie is that McDuck manor is built on an expansive graveyard where he can look for jewellery, trinkets and gold fillings to his greedy heart's content. When he runs out of graves at the mansion (he always buries them back, don't worry) there are always other graveyards in town. And other towns, too. And true, Louie's been dragged back home by the police every now and then, so he's had to get sneaky about his thrifting ways. He can pickpocket like a pro, filching off anybody who isn't Scrooge (who would always notice) and snatching any shiny thing that isn't nailed down and can fit in his pocket when he's out of the house. He's sneaky alright, but also sensitive. Don't touch his stuff or he'll stab you. "did the little dragon add anything to his hoard today?"

#addams au #ducktales #answer #dt17 #scrooge mcduck #dewey duck #huey duck #louie duck #webby vanderquack #bentina beakley #della duck

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transmutationisms · 10 months

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could you elaborate more on your analysis on class in academia? especially the thing about TAs being capable of being class traitors. found your post very intriguing and would like to engage more in this topic

most grad students are not independently wealthy, which is why we pay for school by taking positions as teaching assistants (TAs) or research assistants (RAs). these positions are in turn the actual reason why the school admits grad students in the first place: it's cheaper to pay our stipends, which are often below poverty-line wages, than it would be to hire more faculty. grad students are increasingly responsible for teaching, grading, lab work, and research. depending on how nice our advisors and professors are, we might get co-authorship for some of these efforts, or some lines on our CVs. what we often do not get is legal designation as employees: generally we are classified as students or as ambiguous in-between categories, which means we don't get standard labour protections like sick days, and we can be fired expelled at will. in the us, this also results in ambiguity over basic questions like whether the school is allowed to simply stop paying our stipends if we go on strike: if we're not employees, we're not protected by labour law even in jurisdictions that do protect a worker's right to strike. the grad school experience is largely defined by the labour laws in your jurisdiction, by the culture in your department, and by your relationship with your advisor, who is either tenured or tenure-track and thus has far more job security than you do. advisors have tremendous power over their grad advisees, a situation that makes us easy to abuse or simply to economically exploit (this latter is a particular issue in stem fields where your advisor is also your PI, and being a grad student also entails being a lab employee).

despite all this, grad students frequently have absolutely horrendous class solidarity: for example, our unionisation efforts (when we can even get our shit together enough to push for a union at all!) often ignore non-academic staff, who form a critical part of the academy and are just as exploited as we are, if not often more. grad students also have a deeply nasty habit of trying to emulate our professors in the way we interact with undergrads: condescending to them, trying to make their lives harder, refusing to make allowances for students struggling with deadlines or workload for any reason. often grad students see ourselves as 'temporarily embarrassed professors' rather than as what we are: a very low rung on the academic ladder, most of whom will never land a professorship because statistically, there simply aren't enough of those positions. again, remember that the university is incentivised to hire more grad students and grant more phds than 'the market' needs, because the institution is relying on us as a source of cheap labour. in some fields, a phd can lead to a lucrative industry job (pharmaceutical companies, military contractors, &c); in others, it can lead to several years of underpaid post-docs followed by unemployment or 'under-employment'.

whereas a tenured or TT professor often has a group of employees grad students working under them (typically this is grant-funded), contingent or adjunct faculty work on a semesterly or yearly basis and are paid much less, protected much less, and subject to being let go any time the university reviews their contract. adjuncts are another popular way to reduce labour costs, and, like grad students, are becoming increasingly used to replace tenured roles. some departments have been gutted to the point where they run almost entirely on adjunct and grad student labour at this point. you might think adjuncts and grad students would therefore make natural allies in struggles for better work conditions and compensation. however, adjuncts are still more than capable of being abusive or just assholeish to grad students, and both grad students and adjuncts are difficult to organise because of overwork, fear of losing what professional status they do have, and the fact that adjuncts are often forced to work at multiple institutions at the same time, or to hop between institutions frequently. in cases where serious labour coalitions do start to arise, a university will often offer superficial concessions to adjuncts and/or grad students, like a one-time pay increase (which is not something most grad students receive on a yearly basis, which means in real terms our stipends are usually actually decreasing over time).

anyway, to return to undergrads: in the academy's propaganda self-perception, it is a force for cultural enlightenment and individual self-betterment. undergrads are, then, paying for the privilege of receiving education, here configured as a gift bestowed upon the masses to create an uplifted citizenry and an enlightened society. this is, of course, horseshit. the university is conservative in both structure (resembling a medieval guild, eg the tenure system and the entire structure of grad school-as-apprenticeship) and mission (serving as a class barrier system that enforces and ideologically justifies social stratification through the granting of limited and expensive professional credentials). most undergrads are not wealthy, and many are going into debt for their degrees, which are presented as tickets to future jobs and economic security. it's a system that promises a select few the opportunity to become part of the ruling class rather than the exploited one, and that itself generates massive profits for its upper-level administrators (presidents, deans, and so forth). so yea when grad TAs try to act like tenured profs by treating undergrad students like shit i will call them class traitors lmao

#academia

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f0point5 · 2 months

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I fully support the Jos Hate Brigade coming after the Ocons, also what is up with Anthony Hamilton👀👀 i am honestly getting irritated with people acting like Jos is the devil incarnate, completely ignoring how Max seems to have a pretty good relationship with him (and that radio message telling him how proud he is of him was actually so sweet)

Anthony Hamilton remortgaged his house, and quit his full time job in IT (I believe to be a contractor) to manage Lewis’s karting career. All this while he had a wife and other kids to support.

Nowhere near as bad as Ocon’s parents because while Lewis likes to insinuate that he crawled out of the gutter like a Victorian street urchin, the Hamiltons by all accounts, were a middle class family (owned property, Anthony worked a steady, skilled job). Him quitting his job didn’t mean he didn’t have income, as far as I’m aware. Contracting work pays a lot more than fixed income, you are just able to take breaks in between contracts and have a more flexible schedule, and he had the skills to return to full time work if he wanted. So not as far as betting his family’s future but still..pretty sure Lewis was about 9 at this point.

Also, he managed Lewis’s career for a long time. He was the meddling parent. Lewis eventually fired him in I think 2010. It came out that Anthony had misled Lewis over a deal that had lost him a lot of money (around 20 million if I remember right), which Anthony tried to conceal because he thought he could fix it. Lewis fired him and they then weren’t speaking, but Anthony publicly claimed that Lewis owed him about 4 million for his services as a manager. Lewis said last year that having his dad as his manager meant his dad basically wasn’t able to be an emotional available father to him.

All that, and I believe that Anthony was the one who contacted Christian about a red bull seat last year without Lewis knowing, because he’s still a meddler.

He just seems like he lived through Lewis. He gives interviews saying nothing good ever happened to him (bro you’ve been married twice and have two kids…rude) but it did for Lewis, and how driving for Ferrari was always his dream for Lewis. He also just has that same “life was oh so tough for me poor me” vibe that he seems to have forced on his son. It’s crystal clear he was the pushiest of dads, which don’t get me wrong, you need in order for a kid to be successful, but to choose to be a manager rather than a father when it matters…is he your son or your product?

Idk, he’s giving Jos Verstappen, and not in a good way. Lewis talking about his experience with his dad and comparing it to Max’s the other week in the press was the only time I was like, “yes king speak”. And to be fair he was very respectful. But he point blank said he knew how unhelpful it was when the lines get blurred.

On the Max note, I always say Jos wouldn’t get the wrap he does if more people knew what it takes to get a kid to this less of sport. Jos made his mistakes 100% but you won’t get your kid to F1 by being the perfect parent. Also, Jos did a lot wrong but you can see he probably did more right. People overlook how rare it is to be able to have the relationship he has with Max. To be Max’s age, with Max’s achievements, and his resources, and still want Jos around that much and for them to be that close, that doesn’t come from a relationship with no positives. People act like Jos was tough on Max 100% of the time, but if he wasn’t emotional present, Max wouldn’t want him around all the time, in a personal capacity. He has said many times that he calls Jos for advice on personal stuff. The fact that Max’s favourite song is still the one he used to listen to in the van with Jos on their way to Italy speaks volumes. And for all his “Verstappen 2.0” shit, it’s clear that he appreciates Max as a son. And he seems to have a good relationship with his other kids. (My controversial theory is that he is a soft girl dad but that’s a whole other thing). But yeah basically I think he is over-roasted by people who don’t really understand the industry of high performing kids.

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girlactionfigure · 4 months

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*ISRAEL REALTIME* - "Connecting the World to Israel in Realtime"

❗️SUICIDE DRONE FROM IRAQ… at the Golan Heights, fired by an Iraqi based Iranian Shia Militia. “Exposives-laden” drone crashed and was located by IDF troops.

❗️3 SUICIDE DRONES from LEBANON… fell in open areas of Mt. Dov.

▪️LEBANON… Hezbollah announces it fired 30 Katyusha rockets at Kiryat Shmona. Hezbollah launched about 150 rockets, PGMs and anti-tank missiles at IDF positions and towns in the north of the country yesterday.

▪️MORE WAR POLITICS… the argument grows. Says Min. of National Security MK Ben Gvir: “My disagreement with (National Unity leader) MK Benny Gantz is much deeper than the extension of the term of office of the Prison Commissioner.

The same commissioner who conducted negotiations with Hamas to whom I told her that my policy was the opposite. Who gave positive terms to Kotier, a prisoner from a crime family, and I forbade her and told her that it was terrible, who hid entire events from me, as was the case in Ramonim prison when she told me that there were tensions in the wing and in the end it turned out that they tried to murder a warden.

My dispute with MK Gantz is over the fact that he is in favor of fueling Hamas and I oppose this, he is in favor of giving humanitarian aid without any conditions, and I say humanitarian for humanitarian.”

(Amit Segal) Gantz withdrew from the compromise he agreed to today after the cabinet meeting. Part of the plan is to come up with excuses even though the war will last for many months per the chief of staff last night and despite Gantz’s commitment to stay until the end of the war. The next excuse will be the 2024 budget. It's all a show to escape from committing to stay until the end of the war.

▪️JUDICIAL REAONSABLE-NESS DECISION LEAKS… this would be an earthquake if not for the war. High Court overturns the Knesset Basic Law: Judicial Reasonableness:

(1) It’s unreasonable for the Knesset to require the court to control their reasonableness unless by broad agreement, not a narrow coalition.

(2) An exemption is given for the full high court only, and by not making the reasonableness a blanket standard by giving the high court full panel more flexibility, it became unreasonable.

(3) Two of the judges in the decision are past their required retirement date, without them it would be a 7-6 decision allowing, with them it is an 8-7 decision overturning.

To summarize: Former High Court Lead Judge Hayut is going to cancel a basic law on the pretext that it was accepted "by a narrow majority”.

The court says: The writing of the judgment has not yet been completed. We take unauthorized leaks very seriously and will not address it. The judgment will be published after its writing is completed.

▪️ARAB WORKERS TRY TO POISON CHILDREN? Central district police officers detained 3 gardening workers in a city for questioning, on suspicion of spraying pesticide on playground equipment in the park (with the intent to poison the children).

▪️RELATED: ARAB WORKERS AUTHORIZED? Sahar Saad, chairman of the Palestinian Workers Association: "Israel has issued ten thousand work permits to Palestinians in the field of construction. These permits are limited by time of day for the work - from five in the morning to five in the evening. They allow the entry of workers from Judea-Samaria in Israeli territory. They will come into effect on Jan. 6, 2024. The Israeli contractor ordering the work will guarantee the pick up of the workers from the checkpoint.

#Israel #October 7 #Hamas Massacre #Iron Sword #Realtime Updates

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befuddled-calico-whump · 4 months

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T$$ Military AU (summary)

(just the basic scenario; I'll edit this post if I get more ideas :) )

×~×~×

In a timeline where the US is involved in a head-on conflict with the fictional country of Ebarus, Joy and Jericho are soldiers stationed near the country's border, and Benji is a civilian contractor deployed with them. Despite the ongoing war, things are pretty uneventful at their base, and mid-tour, Benji is transferred to another unit, as his skills aren't currently needed.

One day, the unit is ambushed while patrolling a defended border, and Joy and Jericho are taken prisoner.

Their captors are after secrets about their base, and also want to use them as propaganda. The two are interrogated separately, but give up nothing, and when they're reunited to be questioned together, they initially frustrate their captors by joking around and acting like they're not taking the situation seriously.

The mood changes when their interrogator shows them a video of a beaten, terrified Benji reading off a list of demands. Joy says it's illegal to treat him that way since he's just a civilian, and their interrogator claims he was caught spying, and therefore lost any protection he would have received.

The pair agree to cooperate in exchange for his safety, but manage to convince most of the Ebarian officials that they don't know anything new about the base.

Convinced they're hiding something but unable to hurt them directly due to having an ongoing propaganda campaign with them (and y'know, it's unlawful), their interrogator tries to intimidate them through another captive: Hunter, a scout who's also been accused of spying. To further the effect, they remove Benji from the shared cell, saying they'll hurt him if the pair tries to stop Hunter's “interrogation”.

They can only watch as he's brutally beaten, but when he's tied to the cell bars to be whipped, Jericho wraps his arms around him to shield his back. This technically isn't stopping the interrogation, but the interrogators take it as an opportunity to hurt Jericho, since they can (factually) claim that he put himself in front of the whip, and it wasn't their intention to harm him.

Wanting to put the prisoners to work, the officials enlist J&J to assist in developing new surveillance drones, since that’s something that plays to both of their skillsets. They know the technology will be used against their side in the fight, but with Hunter and Benjis’ safety constantly under threat, they have no choice but to play along. Mistakes or attempts at sabotage are punished through the other prisoners.

One day, Hunter reports hearing a new prisoner further inside the compound. Jericho tries to learn more, and eventually discovers that it's a downed pilot named Kaius. Worried that he's also being tortured as a suspected spy, Jericho threatens to destroy the blueprints they have so far if the guards can't prove that Kaius is as alive and unharmed as they insist he is.

To get him to stand down, the guards throw Kaius into the cell, now shared by all five of them. In an effort to weaken their resolve, the officials restrict the amount of food and supplies going into the cell, saying they'll feed the military members, but not the spies. Since Kaius was unable to prove his rank and allegiance due to his plane and documents being destroyed, he's also labelled as a spy.

Conditions are getting pretty bad, and it seems like the guards are just having fun hurting the supposed “spies” at this point. By now the group knows they don't have a high chance of being rescued. If they want everyone to survive, they'll need to find a way to break out.

The escape plan starts in the workshop where the drone development is taking place. Joy sets the place on fire using some of the robotics components, creating a distraction and allowing Jericho to overpower one of the guards and take his weapons. They then make a beeline for the cell and release the others. When a group of guards tries to stop them, Jericho stands in front of the group, telling the guards that he and Joy are the only ones who know how to build the drone now that the workshop is destroyed, and if they kill them, all that work will be lost.

Not wanting to risk upsetting their bosses, the guards let them pass.

Escape is slow going. Hunter can barely walk, and Kaius needs to be carried due to a broken leg, but eventually they make it to a large vehicle bay and steal an entire tank. (Joy is pleased)

They spend about a week getting out of enemy territory, moving slow and careful to avoid being spotted, and struggling to survive with a lack of supplies and heavily wounded allies.

Eventually though, all five of them make it to a friendly camp, safe and alive.

#not a full huge plot #just putting the guys in a Situation #i have 3-4 comics scripted for this au and will probably cone up with more #t$$ military au #whump synopsis

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nancythedrew · 2 years

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Employers in ND Games Rated By Likelihood of an OSHA Violation

On a scale of 1-10, a 10 meaning holy shit OSHA needs to intervene ASAP and a 1 meaning I would generally be fine working here. Also I just took Employment Law so I’m gonna be that nitpicky person that recognizes that only employees, not independent contractors, are subject to OSHA regulations.

SCK1: The pliers being used to fix a gas leak later swapped with a ladle is not a great solution, but what’s more concerning is what kind of godforsaken gas is coursing through the veins of that kitchen that if he doesn’t have something supporting it for 3 seconds the ENTIRE building is engulfed in flames? Are they cooking on a stove using methane gas? 9/10

SCK-Remastered: Organizing all those unrelated books is probably a pain in the ass for Aunt Eloise but not a safety risk. Getting pistol whipped by your “boss” who isn’t even an actual cop probably sucks but Nancy was functioning more as an independent contractor. I don’t remember what happens in the boiler room exactly, but I don’t think the chains on it were by design, and there was definitely a way to cool that place off if needed, so no -major- hazard. 4/10

STFD: The ability to lock that soundstage so that not even security or the fire department can get in is a lawsuit waiting to happen. The threats and stuff that Rick get probably don’t matter because he’s an independent contractor (although -maybe- an employee if he’s getting contracted season after season??), but the security overall is sus given how easily Owen Spayder snuck in. Imagine if they had some kind of sexual harassment complaint and the offender is just showing up to work under a fake identity. I wouldn’t be surprised if Dwayne was doing that already as Owen. 8/10

MHM: Everyone’s probably an independent contractor so honestly OSHA probably wouldn’t even care about that questionable chandelier. The biggest hazard in the place is asking people about gum bo fu but that seems more of an interpersonal than work environment problem. 1/10

TRT: The spinning 3-step-bridge that those chains to get into the tower activate seems like a disaster. I don’t even know where that pit goes. To the laundry facility? Also the obvious steps sliding that gets Lisa at the end. But if you keep all but the most trained employees out of the tower area and elevator shaft the rest of the place is just a hotel. 3/10

FIN: The rickety lights aren’t great, but the place was gonna get torn down anyway. The wardrobes that lead to each other seems like a sexual harassment claim waiting to happen, the literal actual guillotine could cause some problems, and what the fuck was that cooler that Maya is in at the end? Nothing major that couldn’t be fixed, but as is I’d like some investigation. 5/10

SSH: Hahahah that fucking rock solid structure with stairs with no hand railings and then you walk outside and there’s still no railings even on the BRIDGE over WATER and then it makes you walk around in the dark?? Who is the poor employee who has to restock those glowsticks when they run out? Or someone drips a lil bit of water out of their water bottle onto the stairs? When they make the staff schedule for this place they better factor in the regular trips to Nurse Bluefoot’s because everyone’s gonna be getting head injuries. 9/10

DOG: We still don’t fucking know what Ranger Akers really does for work, Emily seems to run her own basic retail business, idk how Red Knott is funding his escapades. I’m gonna hope that Mickey Malone had his employees enter through the non-graveyard route that wasn’t pitch black, but I’m also really loving the idea of a speakeasy employee snitching on OSHA because they’re not getting enough bathroom breaks or something. (OSHA wasn’t formed until the 70s) 1/10

CAR: After working at a theme park this game is extra funny but like the very concept that these pieces of actual heavy machinery could just be activated at inopportune moments by a single user? Even non-malicious employees could end up fucking murdering each other because there’s no secondary accountability to these machines. Shut this place down and redesign every ride holy shit. 9/10

DDI: I doubt OSHA would figure out how to get into the tunnels from the Hot Kettle. I don’t even know who’s really in charge of the lighthouse but I think as long as they got decent training it’s not an issue. Katie’s boat and Whale World are probably fine unless Katie sends employees down to slip on the thawing fish water. 1/10

SHA: I think….all is fine? The fucked up chicken has a clear warning, the horses are taken care of by someone who’s definitely competent, Shorty’s food is probably ass but I don’t think it’s like a medical hazard. I don’t know what the fuck Mary uses to polish agates but I assume she wears proper eye wear. 0/10

CUR: The only person working a job here is Ethel, who is probably independently contracted, but I don’t think she has anything to bitch about except Nancy going down a slide and walking out of a door. 0/10

CLK: Tubby Telegrams was like the original Postmates (so, independent contractor). The tetanus nail “tip” Nancy gets isn’t great but not worth looking into. Jim Archer’s bank is vanilla as hell. We don’t get to see any of the Lilac Inn’s dining area or kitchen. What we know about the kitchen is that it fully burns down if someone leaves the stove on, but it was the 30s so was anything really safe? 0/10

TRN: Let’s maybe assume John Grey is actually an “employee” and he’s there to find ghosts for his TV show. If so, he gets a sweet ass ENTIRE CAR to himself. The engineer has nothing to complain about. I think Fatima, the mortician at the crypt who jizzes himself over Camille’s, and any and all employees at the Copper Fork seem to be working in similar conditions to your standard fast food place. 0/10

DAN: Within 3 seconds of walking into her new job, Nancy gets a plant pot thrown at her head and is expected to act like it’s no big deal. She has to pick up cockroaches which is nasty but not a health risk (I think?). Getting kicked in the titty by your boss probably violates some rights, as is the questionable reimbursement policy regarding items haggled for at Pont Neuf. 6/10

CRE: Contrary to popular sentiment, Big Island Mike’s Immersion Excursion is not a sweat shop, but is in fact a vacation experience for the whole family (just like a sweat shop). No one knows what the hell is happening at the HilliHilli but those protective suits seem like they’re probably keeping people safe, though there’s always the lingering possibility of the Hilli HIlli Homeboy himself losing his shit on you. Dr. Kim just has you pick up bug poop which is fair given you’re working with a bug doctor. I wish there was some place at her camp to wash your hands, but we can’t have everything, can we. 4/10

ICE: The strangely unsupervised and unquestioned use of firearms by Ollie is conce

(that’s all I had written for ICE in the Google Doc I found. I’m laughing because honestly I think it sums it up pretty well so I’m just gonna leave it. I don’t know why that was the only one left incomplete)

CRY: There’s pretty much no employees in this game, since Renee is independently contracted and everyone else seems to be their own boss. Even if Lamont has a couple of employees that place doesn’t seem like it screams safety hazard, even though the sink is kinda gross. 0/10

HAU: Also no employees but maybe Donal has some sort of agreement where he sells his soul to be able to wank off around the Good People on a weekly basis. Giant chunks missing from a building aren’t great, but that sheep shearer seems to have some pretty good guards and safeties on it. The bar is just a bar. 4/10

RAN: Yet again no real employees. Maybe the monkeys work for each other? I would say their conditions are safe for monkeys, but I don’t know how they get up to the top of that cliff and communicate to those at the top to stop chucking rocks for a second for the next shift to climb up and swap out. 2/10

WAC: Paige seems to have a pretty sweet set up even though her hours are wonky and she has to be wandering around the building at godforsaken hours to catch other people wandering around the building at godforsaken hours. It’s not great that the training for the snack shop it’s just a three-ring binder but it also isn’t like there’s crazy tools involved. 2/10

TOT: The volume of electronic equipment Nancy is asked to fix with no prior training is pretty dangerous, especially when she’s asked to fix an actual literal electrical socket. We know Scott was sending people out into storms they weren’t supposed to be in so I’d say even in the storm chasing industry this team was not following generally accepting procedures. 8/10

SAW: Given that someone literally died by slipping and falling accidentally (allegedly) while cleaning the baths I’d say there’s definitely some unsafe protocols at the Ryokan. Some more railings around the garden would probably be ideal, as would maybe at least a sign by that fire in the middle of the lobby. 7/10

CAP: I don’t know how to classify the tunnels and the forest because I think Nancy is warned to not go into them whatsoever and just disregards that guidance, so I’m not sure the castle as an employer is responsible. The only person really put at risk is Lukas and he’s not an employee so OSHA wouldn’t give a fuck. 3/10

ASH: Again, a lot of people who are their own employers. Also just like a not super dangerous game in general? It’s just a town and there was an arson but that doesn’t have to do with the working conditions, but everything else seems to be up to par for the 21st century. 0/10

TMB: Idk why the fuck the scaffolding collapsed but maybe we should investigate that. Also random cobras? And sand storms? And Egyptian death traps? Fortunately this game takes place outside of the US so OSHA doesn’t have to worry about this(yes I’m being arbitrary with which games I don’t care about because of their non-US location), plus I assume most were independently contracted anyway. ???/10

DED: I mean Nancy wasn’t supposed to go into the lab and start sticking her hands in all those chemicals. Like all things considered it seems like the people authorized to access the dangerous things generally have adequate training to do so. Yeah, a dude got murdered using that equipment, but maybe if they just included a safety or required turning on the coil to be a two person job that could’ve been prevented. 2/10

GTH: The Thornton business really did have its own Triangle Fire so that’s basically the gold standard for “holy shit we need government oversight here.” I don’t really know where the employees are supposed to have been working but since everyone seems to have seen spooky things on the island I’ll assume everyone was within reach of the carbon monoxide, which is an obvious hazard. 10/10

SPY: To the degree that Nancy did work for a terrorist organization she was independently contracted, as probably everyone else was. I don’t really know how OSHA works in terms of national security related government jobs where the idea is you know you might die. But given that this whole game was about a “non lethal” threat I guess it isn’t -that- bad. But getting crushed by the trash thing was probably not ideal. 4/10

MED: I have no idea what the employment situation is where ONE GUY can just “take over” the ENTIRE crew and the entire show??? If this wasn’t a children’s PC game this would be some Morning Show kind of story about how Sonny abused that power. But it’s not. And this game makes no sense. But, I would send OSHA in to figure out what the fuck the plot of this game was. 10/10

LIE: Literally has a set with actual lava and actual handcuffs and actual puzzles you have to solve to get off of the set??? 100/10 call the police too

SEA: Really not sure who’s all working for who here (like I think we’re working for Dagny AND Magnus technically since they’re in a partnership and Dagny hired us) but I can’t remember anything much more dangerous than general sea-faring hazards and if we were Nancy we probably would’ve had adequate education or training to take care of ourselves. 3/10

MID: I don’t know why a passageway in the cemetery leads to the courthouse bathroom, but that aside most things seem to meet similar standards to ASH. The ergot poisoning is weird but doesn’t seem to be tied to a specific employer. 1/10

#nancy drew #effort #generic #favorite

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hungry-dragon-hugs · 2 months

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for those who were wondering, here's the OC from the last post (and my pfp lol)

she's a D&D OC of mine, completely unrelated to any other work i may have. absolutely nothing about her is canon-compliant, but fuck WoTC i do what i want.

character lore and facts (and apparently an entire extreme cuddling short story, i got REALLY carried away lmao) under the cut :>

as stated in the image, she is a monk. despite this, her weapon of choice is an absolutely massive zweihänder. in D&D rules, monks should only be proficient in simple one-handed or versatile weapons. in this case, i made the executive decision that if she can swing a sword that big one-handed she should damn well be allowed to ^-^ (same goes for the presumably very heavy partial plate armor.)

as for the "half-dragon" bit- Kos's dad is a true red dragon, who one day became infatuated with her mum (a normal dragonborn) and disguised himself to flirt with and eventually court her- the affair resulting in her being banished from her clan. when her daughter was born, she named the child Kosjaverthi, meaning "little mountain." the name was meant to represent steadfastness and beauty, but eventually took on a sort of irony- Kos's true-dragon genes quickly became clear when she grew to be literally twice the height and relative bulk of everyone around her.

as one does when blessed with thick scales and enough strength to crush a skull in one hand, Kos set out on the path of the adventurer from a young age. when she was only early in her teens, she dedicated herself to a monastary, living up to both her name's intended meaning and the cultural pride of dragonborn through rigorous honing and mastery of her body and mind.

finding her skills to be satisfactory after multiple years, she set out in search of something to put them to the test. unfortunately, she kept running into the issue of simply being too intimidating- very few low-level targets would even fight her, and many potential contractors would immediately slam their doors on her rather than deal with the possibility of any complications with her during a job.

eventually, luck turned her way, and she found a friendly group of adventurers who welcomed her with open arms- and happened to be in the business of hunting monsters, much more worthy foes than the cowering bandits Kos was previously sent to deal with. she quickly proved her worth and became a valuable member of the team, often acting as a sort of "secret weapon" to turn situations around once they've gone bad. how could something as big as her be a "secret"? simply put, nobody ever expects 3 tons of dragon muscle to move with her level of trained finesse.

and now to address the giant half-dragon in the room: the whole "eating people" thing. the explanation isn't too complicated (i think), but i also didn't check with D&D rules at all for this one because idgaf. the basic idea is, one of the most fundamental parts of her monk training was somatic mastery- essentially the ability to use Ki to control all bodily functions with extreme precision and ease, not just the normally voluntary ones. this allows her to start, stop, carefully limit, or "lock" functions including circulation and, of course, digestion. she can even cause them to do things they weren't previously able to, such as circulating clean oxygen from her bloodstream through membranes in her intestine and into her stomach- or causing her blood to glow by partially activating the magical essence from her draconis fundamentum (fire-breathing organ) directly within her veins rather than expending it in one burst through her lungs.

the inciting incident for her man-eating tendencies was during a trek through a snowy mountain pass on an errand for her monastary- she was often chosen for transport of goods and messages between the establishment and nearby towns, due to her near-immunity to the freezing cold and lack of any risk of robbery. at some point during the journey, though, she came upon a half-elf girl slightly younger than her- lost, freezing, and barely conscious. immediately disregarding her intended deadline, Kos picked up the girl and used her body heat to warm her back to her senses. brief questioning revealed that the girl's name was Lynn, she had come from a town closer and slightly east of the one Kos was bound for, and she had been kidnapped by highwaymen after wandering off during a family outing a few days ago. she had managed to narrowly escape, but had gotten lost and caught outside during a snowstorm the night before.

Kos knew she couldn't leave Lynn to die, and immediately planned out a detour to the girl's town, but she had a problem. if she wanted to keep her warm, she couldn't carry Lynn in her arms the whole way, as the weather would quickly strip any remaining warmth from her. fire-breath was an even worse idea which could only result in Lynn being returned frozen or charred. but, after a few minutes of thinking, she had a solution. drawing on her monk training, Kos would be able to carry Lynn within her own stomach completely harmlessly, keeping the girl warm by the heat of Kos's core while leaving her own hands free.

unfortunately, this left her with the issue of convincing Lynn to willingly let a gigantic half-red-dragon swallow her whole and alive. luckily, though, the girl's desparation combined with Kos's care and gentleness up to that point made the task easier than it sounded. Lynn only had to think for a few moments after the question was sheepishly presented to agree, helped by the clear logic of the suggestion. and so, after repositioning the girl in her arms and whispering a few reassuring words, Kos bent down, carefully unhinged her jaw, and swallowed Lynn whole.

immediately, she was struck (and somewhat concerned) by how good it felt as the small half-elf squeezed through her esophagus and into her belly. Lynn's movements were like a warm massage for her throat, and the gentle weight of her form in Kos's gut was relaxing and somehow... comforting. she took a moment to inspect her swollen abdomen, marveling slightly at the feeling of having an entire living person completely within her. Lynn, for her part, seemed comfortable enough after a bit of fidgeting around, and quickly began to doze off in the squishy, warm space as Kos picked herself up and began trudging along her now-altered route once more.

after almost a day and a half of traveling, Kos finally arrived at Lynn's small town. being a detour from her usual route and one that she hadn't often visited before- especially not on her own- she received her share of strange and distrustful looks from the townsfolk. even so, she went to the address Lynn had told her, jostled her stomach a few times to wake the girl up, and knocked on the door. she was confronted by a tired-looking couple who immediately froze at the sight of her towering form on their doorstep, but couldn't suppress gasps when she told them that she had found their daughter. their elation was short-lived, however, as they soon asked where Lynn was.

never before in her life had Kos seen the mixture of emotions that passed over the pair's faces as they watched their daughter be regurgitated right in front of them, happy and unharmed (and only slightly slimy). but, after a long hug goodbye, Lynn guided her stunned parents back inside, and Kos was on her way. she turned up back at the monastary three days late and with a strange story to tell. years later, long after leaving to make her own way in the world, she never forgot that cozy feeling she got when she held Lynn in her stomach- and now, after making her party members thoroughly aware of some of her "quirks," it is not uncommon for her to show affection to those close to her by taking them in for the night, holding them deep within her core.

so yeah, there's my big dragonborn girlie :> i definitely put way more into that backstory than there probably needed to be, i hope you enjoyed it if you read it all the way through! god why can't i just get this level of detail and coherence out of my actual main projects why do all my creative energies funnel into making characters eat each other help

#long post #Draco's OCs #OC: Kos #extreme cuddling #so much extreme cuddling -v-#Draco's art #Draco's writing

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ridiasfangirlings · 4 months

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Darker Than Black au for K?

Imagine AU where the clans are instead groups of Contractors who all have different goals, like S4 believes Contractors gained their abilities in order to keep the peace for normal humans, Homra believes their powers should be used to live freely and protect those who slip through the cracks of society, Timeless Palace tries to hide the existence of Contractors and superpowers, while jungle wants to create a world where everyone becomes a Contractor and there are no more normal humans. The Sword of Damocles is like a manifestation of power that certain very strong Contractors have, the payment for using their powers is that the Sword will become more damaged each time. As such the Kings have to be careful in their use, like imagine Kokujouji despite being the strongest King almost never uses his actual full power while Mikoto just continues to recklessly use his to protect the people he cares about even though he knows that each time his Sword becomes closer and closer to falling.

I like the idea that the members of their organizations all have similar powers too, like a lot of the Homra guys have fire-based powers. Imagine Kusanagi’s remuneration is to make cocktails, he even has like a little portable kit he brings along on missions so he can whip something up as needed after a fight. Totsuka’s only ability is to calm others, like a touch by him helps regulate the mood of the person he touches. He’s the only one who can help Mikoto stabilize his mood and abilities, but the price is that Totsuka loses years off his theoretical lifespan every time he uses it — the ‘theoretical’ part though is what makes it hard to track, what he loses is that basically if he was fated to die when he’s’x’ years old every time he uses the power it’s ‘x-1,’ so it’s not like he’s just starting at assuming he’d live to 90 and subtracting from there, he has no way to know when he’ll die. When he finally gets killed by rogue contractor Colorless Totsuka just smiles bitterly as he calls Kusanagi, knowing there’s nothing he can do because he’s used his contract too many times. Anna is a Doll who they rescue from a research facility where Contactor Mizuchi was trying to find new ways to create like the ‘ultimate’ powerful Doll, and due to being experimental Anna shows more emotions than normal Dolls do.

Yata and Fushimi are Contractors who awakened in middle school, Yata has fire powers and Fushimi can like turn anything he touches into a deadly projectile. Imagine Fushimi’s remuneration being something like ‘must eat a vegetable,’ so even though he likes having powers he hates using them and Yata’s always teasing him about it. Yata’s remuneration is to loudly and sincerely praise someone, so when they first awaken and are working together Yata of course is always yelling that Saruhiko is amazing. Once they join Homra though Yata is always praising Mikoto instead, which is one of the things that leads Fushimi to join S4 instead. While at S4 there are rumors that Fushimi’s become a Doll, because he’s even more emotionless than a normal Contractor, but anyone who’s seen him fight Yata Misaki knows that can’t be true because that’s the only time Fushimi will show emotions (and then imagine there’s something similar to what happens in canon with Fushimi having to infiltrate jungle at some point, and when Yata comes to save him Yata uses his powers and then confidently yells ‘Fushimi Saruhiko is amazing,’).

#k project #Talking K #okay now I'm thinking about other characters #Awashima's renumeration is to eat anko #Dewa has to tip his hat which is why he's Hat Guy #Benzai has to pet a cat #Akiyama has to step on someone and Hidaka has to be stepped on so that's handy

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mrsalwayswrite · 2 years

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Temptation (Sigtryggr x Reader) Part 1

Summary: When you were hired as the new secretary, you had no idea your boss was the embodiment of a sex god. And by then, it was too late to quit. Can you keep your relationship strictly professional or will the temptation become too much?

This is my contribution to the amazing @punkrocknpearls 400 trope celebration challenge. Congrats again, lovely! Thanks for giving me an excuse to write more Sigtryggr!

My prompt was the trope: boss & secretary/assistant

As you can see, this one-shot got a bit longer than I anticipated and so I've split it into two. Oops? And a huge thanks to @deans-ch-ch-cherrypie for being my creative guru when it came to making the moodboard and being an incredible cheerleader!

Overall warnings: few swear words, brief mention of violence, sexual tension, mild sexual content

Words: 5700

Part 2

If someone had told you that your new boss would be a literal Adonis and have a voice made to feature in wet dreams…you would have turned around and ran, no matter how well it paid.

Unfortunately, no one told you until it was too late.

During the hiring process, you never were interviewed by him, nor even encountered him. All your connections had been through his personal secretary, who was moving away to be closer to family. It was with her that you interviewed, since she was in charge of finding her replacement. You were certain it was only because of Uhtred Ragnarsson's reference and recommendation that she even offered you an interview.

Uhtred was a family friend and he had been the one to pull you aside and inform you that Mr. Ivarsson was looking for a new personal secretary, knowing you were on the hunt for a new job. As a building contractor, Uhtred often worked or made deals with Sigtryggr Ivarsson, CEO of Eoferwic Land Company. The partnership was still new but with the way Uhtred spoke of Sigtryggr, there was a respect there he only held towards a chosen few.

So you put in an application, not really expecting anything to come of it.

You had worked as a secretary at a small art gallery prior, so you had experience and knew the basics of what was expected of you. But it seemed more daunting working directly for a CEO who was making huge, successful splashes in the shark-infested waters of the business world.

Looking back, you should have been more hesitant, more wary, of what you were stepping into. Instead you found yourself excited for the challenge. You had never been one to shy away from things that forced you to expand your boundaries and grow into a better, more accomplished person.

There was your first mistake.

To your complete shock, you were hired. You were certain there had to be more qualified candidates that applied, but you chose not to ask about that. You happily accepted and the start date for your training was set. Mentally you made a deal with yourself that no matter how hard or strenuous the job turned out to be, you would not quit within the first year. Uhtred had stuck his neck, and reputation, out for you and you were not about to make him look bad.

That was your second mistake.

Your first day of training arrived and you dressed up, making sure to look extra professional but also cute because why sacrifice one for the other? All the names and numbers thrown at you felt like you were attempting to drink from a fire hose and only succeeding in drowning yourself. But you were not deterred. Instead you took an excessive amount of notes and reminded yourself that on the first day you were not expected to get everything correct.

By the afternoon, you were feeling better and more self-assured. Even the current secretary training you commented on how well you seemed to slip into the role and do exceptional work. Hearing that, your confidence rose and you thought that maybe this job would be easier than anticipated.

And that was your third mistake.

Because then HE walked in the door….

….and your panties instantly caught on fire.

Sigtryggr Ivarsson was an up and coming star in the business world. His company had only been in the marketplace for a few years but already the name he was making for himself was impressive. You had googled him prior to your interview and found him quite attractive. Yet nothing could have prepared you for the aura that flowed in his wake, the quiet confidence that he wore like a second skin and the air of danger that filled in the color of his shadow. Without a single word spoken, eyes latched onto him, seeking permission for something that no one could articulate. It was instinctual. A top predator had arrived and everyone's baser instincts knew it.

Seeing him now, you realized how woefully short the pictures you had seen compared in giving him the justice he deserved. Electric blue eyes that were beguiling while viciously sharp and highly intelligent. Hair that looked silky soft and just begged for you to run your hands through and pull on. Even his facial scar somehow only heightened his dangerously alluring appearance, that hint of danger surrounding him, manifested.

And when he spoke, greeting you and pleased that his new personal secretary came so highly recommended and to let him know if you ever needed anything….

….what fire in your panties was instantly put out for how wet you became when listening to his voice.

A voice like that should be illegal. It was the perfect combination of smooth and rough, something that should not exist yet did. The slow tempo of it gave notice to the care he took in choosing his words and the sincerity carried in them. His voice danced along your nerve endings and into your brain where your mind immediately stored the sound away for later use. You decided you could happily listen to him read you the phone book, just for the ear orgasm it would give you.

In that moment, you realized you may be in over your head. Not due to the work. Oh no. But by the raw sex appeal of your boss.

When he walked away with a quick wink at you, you swooned, quickly having to grab the edge of the desk to support yourself.

The current secretary chuckled at your slightly dazed expression and announced that you would get used to it. You highly doubted her. He was the incarnation of your previously unknown wet dream fantasy. Yet you were expected to somehow function properly while keeping all your brain cells from melting into goo and your libido in check?

But you were not a quitter. You had accepted the position and made the promise to yourself to last at least a year. So dammit, you were going to work and be the best employee you could be!

And maybe stash an extra pair of underwear in your purse for emergency reasons.

*****

Before you realized it, a couple months had come and gone but you continued working for him. Thankfully during that time you had learned to compartmentalize your attraction towards him. Nothing had changed on his end, he was still the world's sexiest boss, and as you got to know him and his personality more, he only became even more attractive.

But you shoved all those feelings into a small box and shoved it far back in your mind. A workplace romance was not in your best interest, and how cliché would it be if something did spark between you two, a boss and his secretary. You had no interest in that. Instead, you focused on your work, making sure his work life ran smoothly.

And if he took control in some very heated dreams that left you sweaty and aching when you woke up….no one needed to know.

*****

"Right in here," you ushered the Thurgilson brothers into the conference room, "Mr. Ivarsson will be joining us in just a moment. Is there anything I can get for you in the meantime?"

"Just a water for me." The blond, Erik, replied kindly. He quickly took a seat on one of the plus chairs around the circular table, unbuttoning his gray suit jacket.

You turned to look at the older, dark-haired brother. The way his eyes roved shamelessly over your body, without remorse at being caught in the act, made you tense and bite the inside of your cheek to keep a scathing remark from spilling out.

"Are you on the menu?" He asked.

"Brother." Erik rebuked.

"What? It's a compliment."

Erik rolled his eyes before looking at you again. "I apologize for my brother. He was raised by wolves. He'll take a water also."

"No, I want a coffee with two sugars. I suddenly find myself craving something sweet." Sigefrid smirked at you before dropping like a load of bricks into the seat next to his brother.

Quickly you departed to retrieve their desired beverages, and to get away from the older Thurgilson's lust-fueled gaze. He would not be the first businessman you had come across that believed any woman was an open opportunity just because he had power and wealth from his success. You loathed those men.

After getting their drinks, you stopped in front of Sigtryggr's office door, surprised to see him still in there on the phone. You hesitated at the door, wavering if you should check in on him or return to the guests. His eyes glanced up, catching yours through the window, and a whole ballet of butterflies took the stage in your belly. You harshly shoved the feeling aside, used to the subconscious reactions and how to deal with them swiftly.

Your boss held a hand up, telling you to wait for him. You nodded then glanced down the hallway, knowing you could not see the brothers but wondering if they were getting antsy. The older one seemed the kind to come look for his potential business partner if he felt overlooked and insulted by waiting too long. You shuddered to imagine how that scenario would go.

Out of the corner of your eye, you saw Sigtryggr say something accompanied by tapping his fist on his desk three times. Something he did when frustrated but unwilling to show it. He said one last thing before placing the phone back in its receiver, straightening from leaning on his desk and heading your way.

You smiled when he opened the door. "Everything okay, boss?"

What frustration followed him from the conversation melted away slightly at your tease. The two of you had long ago transitioned to first names but it did not stop you from jokingly calling him 'boss' or 'Mr Ivarsson' while in private to see the mesmerizing smile your words would draw out of him.

"The crisis is averted for now." He smiled at you, falling into step beside you as you made your way to the conference room. "What do you think of the potential business partners?"

"The brothers seem very…different to one another."

"Ah. As is the way of many brothers."

You hummed in response but said nothing as your thoughts centered on the two brothers waiting for Sigtryggr.

"Is there something more you wish to share?" His gorgeous voice disturbed your thoughts.

You hesitated, dropping your gaze to the carpeted floor. On the one hand, you did not want to create a negative bias for your boss, but this sinking feeling in your gut refused to subside. Finally you nodded. You knew he valued your opinion, on more than one occasion thanking you for your insight and adjusting business plans based on what you shared with him. A heady realization that was, but you tried to not delve too deeply into it. You were just his personal secretary, not his advisor.

"Sigefrid, the older one….there's something about him."

Sigtryggr stopped just outside of view from the conference room. Turning to face you completely, his voice dropped to a hushed whisper. "What do you mean?"

"It's just a feeling." You tried to downplay the turmoil gnawing at you like trapped rats in a barrel while thinking about the dark-haired Thurgilson.

"Your feelings have never led us wrong."

And cue the momentary swooning.

You flushed under his praise but tried to keep from drowning in the depths of his intoxicating gaze. "I think Erik is all about the business and could be a good ally but Sigefrid…." You trailed off.

"Go on."

"I wouldn't trust him."

He slowly nodded, his gaze momentarily distant as he absorbed your comment. "Thank you. I will keep your caution in mind. Will you be alright sitting in the meeting or do you wish to remain out here?"

You thought of Sigefrid's lecherous gaze and how it felt like thick, black oil sliding down your skin. But you could not leave Sigtryggr and your duties to him. It warmed your heart that he even offered for you to adjourn from this meeting, but you knew he relied on you to take notes and keep track of the time.

"Thank you, but I'll be fine."

"If you insist."

The two of you entered the conference room, Sigtryggr opening the door since you still carried the desired drinks in your hands. With a polite smile, you handed Erik his water and carefully placed the coffee and a water for Sigefrid on the table, while Sigtryggr greeted his guests.

"My apologies for keeping you gentleman waiting. A time-sensitive decision had to be made. It is a pleasure to meet you."

"The pleasure is ours." Erik shook Sigtryggr's hand. "Thank you for meeting with us on such short notice."

"Come, tell me of these new investments you believed would benefit myself and my company."

And so began an hour of Erik speaking of plans they had for building projects that their company would spearhead, but they needed the land and resources that Sigtryggr's company had control over. How it could be mutually beneficial to both of them and an easy way for the younger businessman to further make a name for himself in the business world by aligning with the Thurgilson brothers for this extensive project.

You dutifully took notes and kept track of the copies of prospective building layouts and print outs of land owned by Sigtryggr. You had to give it to Erik, he was a man with the mind and passion for his business and the drive to fully see it thrive.

Meanwhile, that sticky tar-like feeling never left you, for throughout the meeting you could feel Sigefrid's lingering gaze on you. He would add comments to his brother's words and cracked jokes to keep the atmosphere light but the whole time you could not shake the sense that he was undressing you with his eyes.

It was about thirty minutes into the meeting that you began to notice Sigtryggr lightly tapping the desk with a fist. Nothing threatening, but his three short taps, followed by speaking or listening and another set of three short taps. You wondered what had him frustrated since the meeting seemed to be going well and he seemed interested in what Erik was sharing.

"What do you think?" Erik asked around the hour mark and the meeting was slowing down. "If it would help you make a decision, I could have my assistant bring those financial forms I spoke of to you. For yourself and your lawyer to look over before making a decision."

"Perhaps I will bring the forms instead. To show our sincerity. And while you and your lawyer look over them, this beautiful woman could keep me company. Hell, maybe we should make her part of the deal somehow." Sigefrid laughed as if he had made the greatest jest.

You immediately stiffened in your seat, keeping your eyes on your work tablet.

From nearby, you could hear Erik speak, obviously trying to gloss over his brother's blunder. It was your boss that drew your focus though, for he had gone incredibly still. A marble statue was warmer and more animated than he had become.

After a long minute of listening to Erik ramble along, Sigtryggr slowly stood and buttoned the front of his suit jacket. "Gentlemen, it was an honor to meet you. This meeting has been very insightful. I believe I must allot my resources and time elsewhere."

"We understand." Erik replied, standing up as if he expected this.

"No…no, we don't understand." Sigefrid stated, dark brows furrowed.

"Brother–"

But Sigefrid ignored him as he continued. "You were interested. Why are you suddenly throwing us out?" Something must have clicked in his brain because he gave a harsh bark of laughter then vaguely gestured towards you. "Is it because of the joke I made? Fuck. Can you blame me? Look at her. With a body like that, I bet you have her bent over your desk every damn day." He ended with an ugly sneer.

Sigtryggr straightened, clasping his hands behind his back. "Speak one more word about her and I will cut out your tongue as recompense for your vile words."

Chills shot down your spine. Not because of the direct threat but because of the eerily calm and casual way Sigtryggr spoke. It sounded like a casual conversation but the undertone was chilling and made the threat feel even more real and daunting.

Sigefrid puffed up, ready to bellow and rage at the insult and threat but his brother reached over and grabbed his shoulder firmly.

"I apologize for my brother's careless words. We did not mean to insult your secretary. We'll take our leave now. Hopefully in the future we can work together." Erik attempted to placate.

Sigtryggr tipped his head in acknowledgement but made no comment.

The brothers grabbed their things and left, the elder storming out the door muttering under his breath and stomping like an enraged bull.

Once they were out of view, Sigtryggr dragged his chair over and placed it in front of you. With a heavy sigh, he sat down, his knees almost touching yours.

"I apologize you were insulted."

You blinked rapidly, in shock at his statement. Once it sunk in, you stammered out the only coherent thought your mind could conjure. "Why….why are you apologizing? You stood up for me."

"Yes, but you should not be insulted so. To insinuate you are only useful for your body and not the brilliant mind you also possess. It's an injustice to you."

"It's fine. Nothing I haven't heard before." You attempted to wave away the whole scenario, your focus slipping down to the tablet on your lap.

"Not here." Your eyes snapped up at the commanding tone in your voice. Those radiant eyes pierced you, as he held your gaze hostage, as if trying to force his resolute commitment into your mind to understand. "You will not be treated like that here. I swear it."

"Thank you." You murmured, realizing that you believed him.

And you thought that maybe it would not be so hard to meet your goal of lasting a year here….even if you did have to keep a spare pair of panties on hand.

*****

The noise in the bustling event hall vaguely reminded you of the level of sound found in a high school cafeteria or a shopping mall food court. A constant hum of conversations that blended together to create a harmony of mixed emotions and voices. A smile graced your face as you meandered through. The occupants of the occassion were all employees, contractors and close business friends of Eoferwic Land Company and Sigtryggr Ivarsson.

Waving to some IT guys sitting at a table and talking, you continued making the rounds. As you walked, the twinkling fairy lights strung above the tables caught your eye and a pleased hum reverberated in your chest. You had worried the simple decor you chose for the event hall would seem childish or overly romantic with the fairy lights and candles on the tables. But with the industrial interior design of the event hall and its dark, refurbished furniture, it all blended together better than you and Sigtryggr had planned.

Over the past two months, many late nights had been spent with you and Sigtryggr holed up in his office after everyone else had gone home, working out all the details for the Christmas party and the guest list.

And if you thought Sigtryggr was devastatingly attractive during the daylight, working hours….that had nothing on after-hours.

Once all the other workers dispersed and it was just the two of you left alone in the office building, then the torture would begun. He would casually remove his suit jacket, tossing it onto the back of his chair or a nearby surface and proceed to roll up his sleeves to the elbows. Such a simple act. Yet more than once you had to forcibly look away at the strangely erotic action and the blossom of heat that would erupt in you. If it had been a particularly long day, he would unbutton the top couple buttons on his dress shirt, giving you a little strip tease and plenty of opportunity to ogle his sculpted chest.

The worst was when he would lean over your shoulder, placing a hand on the back of your chair and on your arm rest, encompassing you with his sheer presence and delectable body, as he watched you either look up something on your work tablet or take notes. The warmth from his body zapped you like a live electric wire. Even worse was how utterly divine he smelled. At first you had thought it was a cologne or something for there was no way a man could smell that good on his own. It was biologically impossible. But as time went on, you came to the shocking truth that it was his own natural scent. You wondered more than once if it was possible to become pregnant just from inhaling his enticing musk. If you can eye-fuck someone, can you sniff-fuck them too?

On those late nights working with Sigtryggr, it took all of your self-control to beat down your raging libido and the desire to climb him like the magnificent tree he was. It was then, you came to the conclusion that the man needed a warning label for being a hazard to anyone remotely attracted to the male species.

Stifling another yawn against the back of your hand, you finally glanced at the time on your phone. The party had been going on for a few hours now and you knew people would start heading out soon. All the games and entertainment were finally over and everyone left was just socializing or drinking from the open bar. Even if that was its own source of entertainment. Who knew the lawyer could do a keg stand after having drunk just enough to loosen his typical stoic-ness. Luckily, your boss was a considerate man and already had several taxis and Ubers lined up and waiting outside to take people safely home.

At the abrupt shout of your name, you jerked to the left, wondering why someone was shouting at you. When your gaze landed on a hand waving you over, you shook your head and started making your way, a smile on your face the whole time. Sigtryggr and his right-hand man, Wolland, stood at the furthest end of the bar with drinks in hand.

"Heading out soon?" Wolland asked once you joined them, him being the one to have called you over.

You shrugged. "When the party is done."

"We just saw you yawning for the third time in under five minutes."

You narrowed your eyes at the lead manager. "Why were you watching me?"

"Oh, it wasn't me–"

Sigtryggr quickly spoke over him, the smooth cadence a balm to your ears after the many rowdy voices you had been forced to endure throughout the night. "I will escort you to your car when you are ready."

"It's okay. You should stay here and enjoy your party."

"Our party." He gently corrected. "You did just as much work as I did."

You felt the flush warm your cheeks at the gratitude and pride in his voice. "It was fun." And it surprisingly had been. Besides the nearly constant civil war within yourself to not denude your boss. "And really, I'm parked near the main door, so it won't take me more than two minutes to walk to my car."

Five weeks ago, someone in the parking garage next to your office building had been robbed at gunpoint. Ever since then, Sigtryggr insisted on walking you out to your vehicle each night, even if he planned on staying longer at work. To your surprise you quickly found yourself looking forward to the brief walks by his side. During that time, you learned more about him personally than you had known in the many hours you were religiously by his side during the work week. Equally, you began sharing tidbits about yourself and finding similarities in one another. A friendship had already budded between the two of you but those walks seemed to further water and fertilize that friendship until now you could not see him only as Mr. Ivarsson, CEO, but also, Sigtryggr, your friend.

Who frequently invaded your steamy dreams with an unholy yet ravishing domination but that was not important…

"If you insist."

You placed a hand on his arm, feeling the fabric of his suit jacket and his firm forearm under your palm. "I promise, I'll be fine tonight. Thank you though."

He smiled down at you with eyes alight and you felt your heart skip a beat. This man was just too damn handsome for his own good. At least you were not swooning every time he smiled at you anymore. Those were some rough weeks of adjustment, even if you still caught yourself drowning in the vast blue of his eyes even now.

"Wait!" Wolland exclaimed, a sly grin on his face as he took two steps back. Then he pointed upwards.

The bastard.

You glanced upward and felt your stomach plummet and splatter at your feet like a glob of jello. For hanging above you, attached to the decorative wooden beams, was mistletoe.

You still were unsure who had brought the festive plant to the party, but it had generated a life of its own. Throughout the night, someone had sneakily moved it about the event hall so it was never in the same place for long. Many people had been caught underneath it, unaware and unsuspecting until the chanting of 'kiss kiss' started up like they were all prepubescent children acting out a dare. Perhaps it was the amount of alcohol flowing freely in the place or just watching the shock and anguish on the faces of those caught underneath. Whatever it was, you had been very purposeful throughout the night to avoid the dreaded plant.

And now here you stood underneath it….with your boss.

You glanced up at Sigtryggr, heat radiating off your cheeks that was enough to fry an egg. Distantly you could hear the chant of 'kiss kiss' start up, lead by Wolland, of course. Yet it sounded far away, for all you could do was stare into vivid, blue eyes.

"It would be a shame to break the streak now." He spoke just above a murmur, yet his voice echoed in your mind.

And he was right. So far, no one had backed down from their unexpected kiss. Even when the accountant's partner had to kiss Haesten….whom, you were fairly certain, had tried to sneak some tongue into the kiss.

"Okay, sure." You whispered back.

Yet neither of you made a move.

You could hear the laughter and chanting from those still in attendance, but your gaze remained absorbed by the fierce blues holding you captive. Your heart beat a rapid staccato in your chest, threatening to fly out. Subconsciously you licked your bottom lip, tasting a hint of the lipstick you had reapplied only the prior hour. Butterflies erupted in your belly as you caught his gaze tracking the motion of your tongue and the way he swallowed thickly before meeting your eyes again.

"It appears the boss is frightened by a little kiss!" Haesten exclaimed from nearby. "Don't worry, I offer myself as a replacement! I'll happily kiss our beautiful secretary here. We can't break the tradition now, it'll bring bad luck to the new year!"

Your eyes darted towards the man in question, watching as he took a step closer, much to the amusement of those around, with a mischievous twinkle in his beady eyes and an arrogant smirk peeking through his beard.

"That will not be necessary." Sigtryggr replied smoothly and confidently, never removing his gaze from you.

Then he set his drink down on the counter and took that half step, bringing him closer to you. Time slowed to a standstill, as if the world waited with baited breath to see what would happen next. Your head automatically tilted back further to accommodate for the height difference. His free hand drifted up to lightly cup your cheek. His thumb grazed your lower lip, so quickly you were unsure if the touch was accidental or purposeful. Either way, your breath hitched and your lips further parted as if giving him permission.

Slowly, oh so slowly, as if he was savoring each moment, he lowered his lips towards yours. And when they finally touched, you barely suppressed the breathy whine.

Those lips you had spent far too long subtly admiring caressed your own with a gentleness that was endearing yet with an equal dominance that made you wish to surrender to him and obey his every command, for you knew the outcome would be pleasurably delicious.

Just as quickly as his lips met yours, with a chaste, intoxicating kiss, they retreated just as rapidly.

Once his lips abandoned yours, the real world returned with all its noise and demands. The cheers, clapping and hooting of those around infiltrated the momentary peace created by the kiss.

Your eyes slowly drifted open as if your eyelids were suddenly unbearably heavy and your heart continued to hammer inside of your chest. All your senses felt dialed up to a twelve, an uncomfortable sensation as you could feel the many pairs of eyes still watching you and your boss.

In the next moment, Sigtryggr took that dreadful half-step back, putting unwanted but necessary space between the two of you again. A charge colored the air between you two, even with the added space between your bodies. It sizzled and danced along your nerve endings, refusing to release you from the moment of blissful pleasure. Even though the kiss had been the most fleeting of touching. The charged air sang for you to step back into his personal space, to taste his lips once again. It did not help that the whole time his gaze remained locked on yours, with a primal hunger in it you had never witnessed before. It sent a bolt of heat straight to your core and made your knees wobbly.

Wolland returned to his spot, smacking Sigtryggr on the back lightly. "That wasn't so bad, eh? People will be talking about that for weeks."

The simple action and comment equated to a bucket of ice cold water doused over your head. Your mind scrambled to rise above the lust-tainted waters and remember you were in a very public place. Your libido and whatever speculation your mind attempted to conjure of your boss' thoughts were forced to die a swift death. This was not the time or place to dwell on it. Even now you could feel a few eyes still watching.

"Next is your turn." Sigtryggr replied, grabbing his drink off the counter and taking a long sip.

"Oh no, there is no one here I'd like to kiss." Wolland waved his free hand. "On second thought, if y/n here volunteers, I'd be willing to share a kiss with her." He gave you a flirty wink which thankfully helped further diffuse any lingering tension in the air.

You chuckled, smoothing your hands down your dress. "Thank you but one kiss is enough for me tonight."

"Well, if you change your mind, I'll be here. Or if you prefer another taste of this scrawny twig, I'm sure he'd be willing to oblige–"

Sigtryggr none-to-gently nudged his friend, almost making him spill his drink.

You laughed, taking note of the barely discernible blush on your boss' cheeks. But that could not be because of the desire to kiss you again, right? That would be insane. He was probably just embarrassed he had to kiss an employee in front of everyone, even if you two had developed a friendship. Besides, you were no one special and he was…he was a sex god, created to tempt and torment anyone marginally attracted to men. He could never be interested in you.

With that sobering thought in mind, you decided it would be best to leave now before you somehow were forced to kiss someone else. "I'll let you know if I change my mind, Wolland." You teased. "Now, I'm going home to change out of this dress and crawl into my bed."

"If you need help out of that dress…."

This time you smacked Wolland's arm, even as you jokingly rolled your eyes. "Good night." Your gaze drifted over to Sigtryggr, seeing his eyes already on you. A battalion of butterflies erupted in your belly but you quickly shot them down. "Good night, boss."

"Sleep well." He nodded, the corner of his lips turning upward.

You smiled at the two men once more before turning and walking away. You said good-bye to a few others, graciously enduring some lighthearted teasing about your shared kiss, before heading out of the restaurant and to your car.

The whole drive back to your place, you could feel your lips tingling, your mind replaying the kiss over and over like a broken record. A few times your hand would drift up and trace your own lips, resparking the tingling sensation. Whenever you caught the action, you would forcibly grip the steering wheel with both hands, pretending it was an anchor you had to hold on to for dear life. That image did nothing to fully suppress the instant replay of the haunting kiss.

You wondered how the kiss would change the dynamics between you and your boss. Would it be acknowledged Monday morning? Would the two of you get a good laugh and it would become an inside joke? Or nothing would change at all? The kiss would never be spoken of and easily forgotten like a seashell left on the beach amongst hundreds of others.

That last thought felt like a shard driven into your heart. For you knew, that kiss would forever be branded into your brain.

Even if he forgot it.

*****

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