#will i pick her up.... maybe. thats what this post is trying to spur | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

heyitsyn · 3 years

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Keeping Up With Seijoh Pt. 10

a/n: based on this post uwu

okayokayokayyeyyy

LOOOK I LOVE THIS SCENE LIKE I CAN GO ON A RANT OF HOW IMPORTANT THIS SCENE IS LIKE SKDJSLDKKSSM

okay so

yuhhhhhh

the way this is set up is basically seijoh simping for you

also they have their own separate gc just for them bc they dont want you to see them just simping for you

even tho oiks ltr does that everyday

but hes not ready for that conversation

there was a few times that you were kinda curious as to what was in the chat

but they would click off and they would blush before diverting you to a different conversation

this might sound hella weird and creepy

idk bout yall but i think its cute that they take random pictures of you doing the sinplest things

this all started bc of one picture

from baby aki-kun

so basically you stayed behind with kunimi during monday to just study and you sat in front of him while sharing his desk

babie took a pic of you just studying and he sent it to the gc with no context

its a known fact that seijoh doesnt practice during mondays so they were all doing something out of school

but they were all missing you so seeing you with kunimi fueled jealousy in everyone

even kyo

oikawa blew up in the chat and was keyboard smashing

the others were just teasing him like hes lucky youre with him

but behind the screen, they were blushing and red and envious and AAAAA

thus spurred on some sort of competition

like they would send the chat pictures of you like 'hA TAKE THAT SHES WITH ME'

unbeknowst to you, these boys have folders of just cute candid pics of you

oikawas insta is filled of you and his snap is full of you in his story and his tiktok is full of screaming simp rants about you

the tiktok comments are all like,

‘IS SHE YOUR GIRLFRIEND?!’

‘OIKAWA-SAN SHES ADORABLE’

‘BACK🤺OFF🤺OIKAWA🤺I🤺CALLED🤺DIBS🤺ON🤺HER🤺FIRST🤺‘

random ones like him doing a day in my life type of vids and you appearing and everyone can just see the small blush on his face and the bashful yet happy smile on his lips

its really adorable

but the real ones know that shes been appearing in his insta since day 1

moilk.bread.1

thats practically your account now

welll,,,

its more of a fan account for you and a lot of people from aoba johsai follow that account since you dont have an official one yet so they all simp for you there

the pictures were all from everyone like the boyz group chat was a haven for your candids

you did think it was strange that the boys would constantly ask to take pictures with you and everyone was just trying to get a pic to have aesthetic couple pics w you

and they would put it as their wallpaper or lockscreen

IMAGINE THE BLUSH THEY WOULD GET WHEN COMPLETE STRANGERS WOULD ASK THEM IF THATS THEIR GIRLFRIEND

oooo i mentioned this in the post too that iwa and you went to the gym and you guys took a mirror pic

after, you didnt really like the gym bc its just hard yanno?

iwa went back and while he was setting up his weights and equipments, his gym buddy noticed his phone light up causing your picture to show up

'oh? is that your girlfriend, iwaizumi?'

duh he doesnt have a girlfriend so he was like 🤨 until he saw his phone

the lockscreen was blaringly bright and your 'couple pic' was showing with the notifications

totally not oikawa blowing up their group chat bc he was with you

ofc babie hajime got all flustered and he blushed before shaking his head

'n-no'

he mumbled and his buddy laughed before clapping his back

'well, you obviously like her so do somethinf about it before someone does'

dont you think he doesnt know that?

also with mattsun!

this mans works in a cute cafe that this old granny owns and this thought has been living in my head rent free

and he was working during the weekend at the cafe

there were other people there but granny loves him bc hes been working there sibce he was like 15 and she took care of him a lot

he was like a grandson

so while he was serving, this granny was manning the cashier and checking people out

issei's phone was there on the table behind the counter and it started glowing at the indication of the messages being received

'have a nice day-oh!'

she noticed it right there and she saw the picture on his lockscreen

you were probably being carried by him due to your levelness with his height and you were kissing his cheek while issei smiled brightly

that was a picture you both took during an outing at the mall and the sunset behind you was just perfect to take a picture in

poor granny was like 'oop dont look at the messages' so she turned it over to not go to his privacy

there again you were

it was a polaroid of you two and he was backhugging you at school

hint? 👀

askldfjlsdkf

she knew issei was a very handsome young man so there shouldnt have been a surprise that he would be dating someone

can we name this granny?

granny inko lol

okay so granny inko saw issei coming over to rest the serving board thing and she beckoned him over

mattsun nodded and leaned over the counter to see what she wanted only to be greeted with a flick to the forehead

‘oW what was that for?’

he whined while holding the spot

granny inko tutted disapprovingly before crossing her arms

‘youve been working all week this week when you could’ve taken time off to spend it with your pretty lady. is this how men are nowadays? didn’t i teach you right to treat women properly?’

duh baby mattsun was confused like O_O

‘wha?’

his dumb question made her grab the phone and place it on the counter in front of him

‘your girlfriend, child. women need attention constantly and as much as you want that money, is it worth losing that smile full of happiness?’

okay stop it granny im getting emotional

more like disagreeing bc that wouldnt put food on the table BUT ANYWAYS

baby issei was surprisingly embarassed and scratched his neck

‘um,, baa-chan,,,,, she’s not my girlfriend’

he flustered and gave her an awkward smile

granny inko shot him a confused look and tapped the phone

‘well, she looks like she is. and if not, better hurry your move, boy. girls that make men happy like that only comes as rare as a good scratch ticket’

LMAO

i do not encourage gambling so please save your money kids

you know what

these boys do that just to actually feel like it

okay thats confusing so imma explain it in greater detail

whenever someone mistakes you as their girlfriend, it makes them feel like you are for that split second and its just an addicting feeling

its like what if you were their girlfriend?

i mean, youre already the whole team’s girlfriend but theyre greedy brats and just want you for themselves

ohohohohoh

kyo!!

kyo def has a selfie of you both with the doggie filter but it was actually you who took it while he was just staring at you in the background

that was his lockscreen for like the rest of his high school career

lol

anyways!!

he was actually in a fight and during it, his phone fell off to the ground and conveniently oikawa messaged causing it to light up

one of the thugs had their hands gripping kyo’s collar and was pushing him against the wall while the others were surrounding them

they saw the phone flash and kyo cursed at the terrible timing and he made a mental note on killing oikawa later

a guy picked it up and he smirked, seeing the pretty smile of a pretty girl

‘heh? whats this?’

kyotani pushed the guy who was holding him but other two surged towards him and held him tighter

their leader snatched the device and chuckled

‘oh. its that bitch from his school. what is it’

he snaps his fingers as he tries to remember before stopping

‘aha! l/n y/n!’

kyo growled

‘shut up!’

the guy grinned at him and tapped the phone against kyo’s chin

‘oh yea. i heard shes a cutie. most people here know her, kid. now we know shes connected to you and guess what. you cross us again, she’ll take your place as you are right now. orrrr, we can,,, use her as our pet. thats how she is in your team, right? so let us have a turn. maybe we can send you a pic, hm?’

yea no that wasnt happening

kyotani easily beat those people up after because even just saying that unleashes power he didnt know he had

‘bastard. youre lucky this is just a warning. you touch her and i will kill you’

he landed one last kick on the guy’s face before taking the phone and leaving

now he has to figure out how to hide the bruises

you fussed later and he didnt tell you the reason instead just saying they said something that made him angry

nah

you were a person he didnt want to disappoint and he knows how much it hurts you to see him in that state

that was one of the things he hated but loved at the same time

you were such an empath that you would treat him and wince as if you were the one feeling the pain instead of him

and it made him feel special

you were one of the few things he holds close and he would be damned if anything happened to you because of him

the group chat was actually just blowing up with more screaming and the third years yelling at each other with the first years just casually reading the texts

they were used to the arguments within the team and you would remain so naive with the whole thing

kunimi is the type to keep silent and he didnt really care about anyone getting angry if you were spending time with him

but he does get annoyed if you were with kindaichi because you three were a package lol

like when kindaichi and you were at the arcade, this kid walked all the way there just because he didnt want kindaichi to hog you to himself

duh you thought this was adorable and endearing bc they wanted to hang out w you

no LUV theyre greedy brats who gets jealous over yOU

so like i mentioned before that you and makki would walk over to the bakery and you guys would buy food there and such

and its also canon in here that makki only shares his food with you and no one else lol

why?

because when you eat the puffs, you put one in each cheek and it makes you look so adorable like a squirrel

sorry but squirrels are so cute like AAAAA

makki takes so many pictures of you and a lot are surprise shots where your eyes would be wide with cheeks full of food

aaaaa so cute

like you and makki sat down on a bench in the park across the bakery and you excitedly dug in to your own treat

makki chuckled at your excitement but he placed his hand on you arm to stop you

‘y/n-chan. say aaa’

you lit up and let him put the puff in your mouth and thought he was done but was surprised when there were two

you happily chewed it and went back to looking at your treats

but makki interrupted you again by calling you out

‘princess~’

the nickname made your eyes widen with red painting your cheeks and the shutter of the camera made you realize what he did

‘makki-senpai!’

you whined and he laughed

makki had a lovestruck smile on his face and he wiped the bit of creme on the corner of your lip

‘gotta take care of my princess~’

STOPPPPP MY HEART? GONE MY SOUL? GONE HOTEL? TRIVAGO

OH MY GOD IM IN SUCH A MAKKI AND MATTSUN AND IWA AND OIKAWA AND THIRD YEARS IN GENERAL BRAIN ROT PLEASE HELP

but we gotta give love to the second years :’)

ive mentioned that watari is the only person to ever go into your house right?

well, he comes over to cook and such so you guys spend time making food for the team

watari takes this opportunity to take pictures of you cooking and the group chat cries bc its so domestic and they all start having the same thoughts

they really said seijoh braincells

it was like seeing a glimpse of a possible future for them

you, wearing an apron, cooking on the stove with your hair thrown in whatever with baggy clothes

gosh

thats like you someday being their wife and waking up one morning to see you there cooking in the kitchen

oikawa swears he had a dream that night because of that picture and he continuously thanks watari for YEARS because of that picture

okay are you curious about the dream?

yuhhh

oikawa woke up in an unfamiliar bed in a foreign room

he felt his bones crack when he stretched and his hand extended out to a side that was still quite warm

somebody must be sleeping next to him

then he stood up, catching his reflection in the mirror in front of the bed

;)

why would there be a mirror there hmmmm????

ANYWAYS

he noticed he had a bigger build and his hair was longer

then came the itch of the facial hair that he swore wasnt there a minute ago

this guy even checked out his butt and to his surprise, wow

obviously he was confused and a part of him thought this was the future

tooru walked to the door to go into the hallway and concluded, yep, this was not his house

then he heard music being played somewhere and a mixture of voices coming from a room

sounded like a woman and children

he stops at the top of the stairs, suddenly hit of the thought that this voice was so familiar

‘hm?’

tooru walked downstairs and stopped when down the hallway in front of the steps led to the kitchen where the voices seemed to lead to

‘mama! mama! mama! toast! i wan toast!’

‘in a bit, darling. just let me finish flipping the pancake’

the song was lo-fi with the volume being turned low enough to hear the voices fine

tooru wandered down the hallway and he stopped, finally seeing the owners of those voices

there was a handsome little boy sitting on the chair by the island and his brown hair was a mess of wild curls

there was a woman with h/c hair swaying to the tune and a beautiful little girl curled up in her arms while sitting on her hip

‘hey’

oikawa spoke out and caught everyone’s attention

‘papa’s awake!’

‘pa!’

‘hello tooru’

tooru froze

that was you

he knows it’s you

‘y/n-chan’

he whispered and you looked back at him from the pan

‘yes? if youre looking for coffee, we ran out apparently’

that was not what he was talking about

he hastily walked over to the boy and he blinked rapidly

‘you look like me’

he mumbled and the child grinned

‘eung! papa and yozo look the same! mama and nana say so!’

yozo?

feeling like all the attention was on him, the little girl whined and her hands made grabby motions to him

‘pa pa’

she whined and tooru just felt something in him that screamed to hold the kid

you shushed the little girl

‘dont worry, looney loon. papa’s right there’

loon?

tooru stayed frozen at his spot and you raised an eyebrow at him

‘tooru? luna wants you’

luna

that snapped him out of his trance and he held the little girl in his arms where she smiled at him and then he felt tears welling up in his eyes

then he woke up

okay sorry that was a long dream

so this dragged on for so long already okay

this was only meant to be small but aaaaa i couldnt help itt!!!!

but anyways!

the boys are just simps for you and theyre creeps that take pictures of you and they think about you all the time pls accept their love

also a mild continuation of the dream:

oikawa was holding luna and she was happily laying there when another figure emerged from the hallway

‘iwa-chan?’

he asked, surprised

what was he doing here?

iwa heard his name and grunted before going to a beeline for you

you smiled at him and he leaned in to give you a kiss to which oikawa froze in

iwa noticed his best friend holding his daughter and luna saw her father there

‘daddy!’

she shrieked and tooru blanched

‘uh, what?’

iwa extended his hands out to hold the girl but tooru held her tightly and leaned back

haji narrowed his eyes

‘um, give me my daughter, oikawa’

he grumbled and tooru shook his head

‘no! shes my daughter!’

you blinked

‘your god daughter, yes. but she’s half of your best friend, tooru’

half of his-

god? daughter?

‘so that means-’

‘piece it together, oikawa. did ya get brain damage or something? babe, call the doctor’

oikawa screamed

a/n: lol look WHO ROSE FROM THE GRAVEEEEEEE :) anyways. i really want to deeply apologize to everyone for taking an unexpected break and i shouldve told you guys and im really sorry :( everythings just chaotic lmao and im just like taking a breath for a second uwu and im so AMAZED at how many people still follow me even tho ive been gone for so long like bls yall are real ones :’) i love you all and the req box is still closed at this time as i need to finish the ones i have first soo thankyou for reading thiss and hopefully ill update soonerr!!! :)))

also not me completely messing up my kuws and missing 8 and 9 in my masterlist and having a mindblowing realization that i have 10 keeping up with seijoh fics

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jack-fruit · 5 years

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Paint the Stars

Hey gamers this fic is apart of my personal swap au which I also wrote this for. You really don't need to read that one to understand this one, but its short lol. All you need to know that's mentioned there is Aziraphale is a bat demon so like

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When the starmaker first learned to paint, he was going by Anthony. He had no reason to go by an alias, but he had grown rather fond of it after providing it to a rather polite demon. His decision to dip his fingers into what was the original sorry excuse for paint, however, had nothing to do with his name, but everything to do with his title.

He had hoped after the fiasco with Adam and Eve, She would allow him back into the expanse of space to make stars once again. She told him he had more to do on Earth, much to Anthony's chagrin. So he walked among man bitter and with hands itching to create.

They'd only been a few generations into humanity when a girl first found that mixing together egg yolk and red soil would make a substance that would trail bright and stick to the rock. She used it to make crude drawings, which Anthony watched, impressed.

It wasn't until there was a suitable array of colors avaliable that Anthony felt the tug of longing hard enough that he sheepishly approached a group painting across an expanse of cave walls and scooped up some of the yellow paint.

He created starbursts across stone and nebules across rock. He didn't have all the colors he wanted to work with, but the thrill of a challenge only spurred him on. He may have also been there to nudge the Egyptians in the right direction of finding blue paint, okay? Sue him- blue was one of his favorites.

It wasn't until around 300 BC that Anthony picked up a paintbrush. There had been other attempts at something similar before, but all the crude sticks and leaves could not capture the fine detail a brush of a fingertip could.

Anthony was perfectly content using his hands and fingers, just as he always had, but the man selling the brushes assured him they were intended for caligraphy. The angel picked up the thin bamboo with animal hair attatched to one end, and decided that perhaps a certain demon would get a kick out of it. After all, Az loved the written word, perhaps he would like a tool to help create it.

He had originally only meant to try it out. To make sure it worked as advertised, but as he dipped it into the ink that he'd purchased alongside it, he slowly realized things were not going to go as planned.

The gentle sweep of the brush across parchment was a sensation he liked almost as much as fingerpainting. And it kept his hands blessedly clean. He created a void in the paper, a sinkhole from which there was no return. He then got up, grabbed his paints, and wove a galaxy around it. He tucked the concept into the back of his mind, deciding to ask Her to let him abandon post for just a while to play around again.

He was going by Raphael when he realized that he could paint more than just space. He had been out in the cosmos for a few decades, having gotten the okay to return to where he belonged. He had ended up quite liking the brush idea, which is where the staff came from.

His staff was a long piece of carefully maintained bamboo that he was able to miracle from brush to staff with minimal effort. The staff worked a bit different from an actual paint brush, it didn't even have a proper brush end, really, but the angel would push his power through it in arcs and waves in ways he hadn't really been capable of before.

But he missed Earth, much as that fact irked him. He missed the browns and the greens and the greys. He missed the food and the wind and the sounds. Above all, he missed the sparkling darkness of a certain demon's gaze, which he would certainly never admit.

So he returned to earth and decided to give a new name a whirl. Raphael. When he told Az about it, he laughed, but did start calling him by the new name. It put something at ease in his chest, that approval.

Raphael had known that people painted things other than space, of course he did, but he never thought to do it himself until he saw a man painting a landscape.

"Mind if I join you?" Raphael had asked without thinking. The man looked at him, curious, but nodded his consent and offered Raphael the paints he was using. All earth tones, nothing like the angel liked to work with.

Withholding a sigh, Raphael decided to paint the same landscape. It was more challenging then the colorful and shapeless bursts he was used to, but it was easy enough to get. Sharp bursts of brown-green, yellow spikes of grass, grey-brown bark. It was the same concept, the pallete was just different, the angles a bit sharper.

"What are you doing?" Raphael jumped and whirled to face the fanged grin of his adversary. The original painter and his canvas had vanished.

"Why are you here?" The angel tried very hard not to sound pleased.

"I asked first, Starmaker," Az said, taking his brush from him and narrowing his eyes at the carvings on it. "Are these snakes?"

"Snakes are cool," Raphael hissed, turning back to his painting. "And I'm painting, now you."

"Oh just spreading some chaos here, michief there."

"Which I will inevitably thwart," Raphael noted. "You know, maybe-"

"No! No we are not..." Az's voice dropped to a harsh whisper, "we are not teaming up Ant- Raphael."

"Antraphael?" The angel teased momentarily, before his expression turned thoughtful. "That sounds like an angel I knew- a principality. Wonder what happened to him...haven't heard from him in ages."

"Doesn't matter," Az snapped, aggrivated. "I know what heaven is like. They find out you're helping the enemy and you know what they'll do? They'll toss you out, and thats if you're lucky!"

Raphael's brushstroke shot up, ruining the entire painting.

"Let's go get drinks," he grumbled, waving the project away. It would be years before he would finally rediscover, fix, and finish the damn piece.

The name didn't last, of course it didn't. Anthony knew Az was really quite uncomfortable with the name Raphael, despite his insistance of it being fine. The closest the angel got to an answer was 'reminds me too much of someone else. Not you.'

So he was Anthony again when he realized how truly and utterly fucked he was. It was the 19th century, and realism- true realism- was coming into style. The more detailed and real looking a painting looked, the better. And for the first time since paint had been invented, Anthony couldn't master a style of art.

Of course, he would eventually, but at the present everything he painted looked cheap and fake. The concept of shading was new to him, nothing cast shadows in space and his landscapes were more stylized than anything. Along with that, still life was a bit drab to him- lots of looking and staring at inanimate objects doing nothing and feeling nothing for hours.

In contrast, portraits had the opposite issue. The subject was too squirmy, and the constant annoyance and boredom that flared up would effect his brushwork.

Plants were a good compromise, just alive enough to entertain him, but not squirmy enough to distract him. He spent hours trailing greenery across his canvases, adding bursts of color where flowers decided to plant themselves.

He ended up surrounding himself with plants, expresing his annoyance if they began to wilt, which would quickly make them perk up once more. He accidently scared the plants, he thought, what with all his frustrated yelling and the torn canvases strewn across the floor, but it did lead to them looking exquisite. He'd be lying if said he hadn't been hamming up the dramaticness that came with destroying his less than perfect works.

Az had come over once, sitting properly in a plain, stiff wooden chair he summoned while Anthony sprawled out across his own sofa. Az was looking at a half finished painting of a plant.

"Do you ever paint anything other than plants?" Az asked suddenly. Anthony sat up and followed his gaze.

"Space."

"Other than space and plants."

"Like what?"

"People?"

Anthony snorted and fell back against the cushions, "nah, people move too much."

"Oh," Az said. The two fell quiet for a few minutes before Az spoke again. "Well if you like, I could...you know, model for you. If it would help."

"I- you- what?" Anthony sputtered. The demon scowled at him.

"Mind out of the gutter, Anthony. It's simply that...look I can hold much more still than any human could, I would be an easy model to start with to get the human-esque form down."

Anthony was quiet in his consideration. Much as he loathe to admit it, it did make sense. And as much as he loved painting plants and stars, he did want to branch out, if only to prove he could. He was a stubborn bastard that way.

"Fine," he grumbled. "Just...stay there, then," he launched himself off the couch and collected his paints.

"Now?" Az asked, and when Anthony turned to face him, his dark eyes were curious and wide and just...beautiful.

"I- er- that okay?" Anthony asked, taking his brush and twirling it in his fingers. Az nodded; Anthony nodded back in reply. The angel turned his easel towards the demon and, with a slow breath, began to paint.

He had always found Az remarkable- with his intelligent eyes, his soft, slightly singed curls, the curve of his delicate pink lips...

He was practically in a trance, looking more at Az then his canvas. It felt like no time at all before he had finished enough for Az to move if he wished. The demon cracked his neck at an inhuman angle, then stood to look over Anthony's shoulder.

"Oh...Anthony," his breath ghosted across his ear and he had to surpress a shiver, "this is perfect, how have you been having trouble?"

Slowly, Anthony tipped his head back. He let his curls brush against Az's shoulder as he did so, and when he looked to the left he could see how close the demon really was. With his eyes that reminded him so much of his night sky that it hurt.

Oh.

Oh fuck.

"S'not done, still time to mess up," he said over his mounting panic. Az laughed that soft laugh of his and grinned, revealing those delicate little fangs perfect for-

Anthony's entire brain ripped like a canvas in a desprate attempt to get that image out of his head. In the meantime, Az had pulled away and offered him an apologetic farewell. Anthony was still sewing his brain back together when the door closed firmly behind him. He was still stitching his sanity back into place as he found himself setting up a new canvas. He was still lost in a daze as he found himself wondering how many years it would take to draw Az perfectly from memory.

The first time he wrote out the name "Anthony J. Crowley" had been on the deed to his studio. A studio he had not planned on getting at all, but when a giddy bat demon bounced up to him only about 60 or so years after the whole gay crisis thing Anthony had no choice but to follow. He wasn't sure if the blindfold made him more or less eager, if he was being honest.

"Watch your step!"

"I can't see, idiot, there's a blindfold over my face."

"Stop sassing me or I'll gag you, starmaker."

"Kinky."

"No!"

Anthony laughed, feeling a warm flutter in his chest as Az very firm stopped him with a hand on his shoulder. Then, he removed the blindfold.

"Tada!"

"A...building?" Anthony raised an incredulous eyebrow at the demon.

"It's for your studio!" Az enthused.

"My-?"

"I originally bought it thinking about making a bookshop out of it, but then I realized thst would require me to, um, you know, sell my books? And so I thought instead I'd give it to you. I've already found a quaint little cottage for my books And I to stay, so I have no need for it, obviously-"

"Azzy..."

"No need to thank me, you're just taking it off my hands," the demon pushed on, shoving a deed into Anthony's hands and then bolting like the devil himself was after him. Anthony looked at the deed, then at the building.

It could use some paint...

1967, he'd been going by Crowley for 25 years as far as close friends were concerned. Well, close friend. After tonight, though...

He leaned heavily against the door to his studio, against the painted grasses and flowers that stretched across its surface, growing towards glow and the dark stars. Against his chest, Crowley clutched a jar containing a single, wild spark of hellfire. Uncontrollable, untamable, and all Az's.

'What, not going to offer me a lift?" Crowley had quietly asked, sitting behind Az on his motorbike.

Crowley moved as if he were walking through the thickest of oil paints. He entered his room, set the jar on his desk, then returned to the studio itself. Half finished projects were littered everywhere. Crowley looked at them and felt empty.

A soft, pained laugh. 'I know I go too slow for you, Crowley...' Then, the most heatbroken admission, 'I am... quite unsure if I will ever be capable of catching up with you.'

Crowley's whole body began to shake. Hands balled into fists, and then he screamed. He grabbed a wooden stool that Az could often be caught sitting on and threw it right into one of his paintings. It splintered and ripped and Crowley felt good.

He tore paintings from the wall, shattered frames against the floor. He ripped apart each brushstroke, each secret hope. He only stopped when he tore his paintbrush off the chain around his throat and tried to snap it. Lucky for him, past Crowley had enchanted it to be basically invincible, so his efforts simply drained him. He let it expand into his staff so he could lean heavily on it as sobs wracked him. He was angry, he was heartbroken, and he had never felt less holy.

In the years leading up to the apocalypse, Crowley hadn't been painting much. Any attempts to bring his brush to the canvas were hindered by the fact that the world was ending, and that in less than eleven years all these things he was making would be destroyed. Again.

He thought maybe after everything, after escaping heaven and hell, he would be able to paint avain. Yet, as he sat with a sketchbook in his lap in Az's livingroom he felt no spark, no drive.

Well, that wasn't true. He felt something, but it wasn't the need to create. He took a swig of wine and looked up to where Az was quietly contemplating his own glass.

"I-"

"It's Aziraphale."

"...what?" Anthony sat up straight for the first time possibly ever. Az flinched.

"My- my name...my angel name. I never," he bit his lip, "all the other demons were changing their names, but I never meant to fall. I liked the name the Almighty gave me, even if She...so, so perhaps you can call me Aziraphale from noe on? Since I guess I'm technically not a demob anymore..."

The name was familiar. It brought Crowley the memory of a flash of white wings and blue eyes watching him work. However, that image very comfortably faded to fit the face of the demon he so loved.

Aziraphale.

"Aziraphale," he spoke it in a way that made one think of blasphamy. He caught the demon's shiver. Slowly, Crowley set aside his sketchbook and his wine and he prowled forward.

"Crowley?"

"Yes, Aziraphale?" He breathed, close enough to count the lashes framing Aziraphale's dark eyes. They fluttered closed.

Lips pressed against lips, soft and full of longing and hope. It took Crowley a moment to realize he hadn't been the one to close the gap. He framed Aziraphale's face in his hands, like the work of art it was, and kissed back.

A gasp and then hands fluttered against his back, gripping at his jacket as the angel pushed him back in his chair, thoughts scattered so only one thing remained.

Aziraphale, Aziraphale, Aziraphale.

They laid in a bed conjured earlier that evening. Aziraphale didn't own one, since he was used to hanging upsidedown from the rafters when he slept at all. He made an exception tonight, though, and was now curled up fast asleep in Crowley's arms. He traced the blue-purple-red bruises scattered across his lover's skin and smiled fondly as Azirphale wrinkled his nose and turned in his arms. Slowly, Crowley untangled himself and moved towards the easel he'd put in the room back when Aziraphale was sleeping for a century. He had wanted to be around the demon, even if he was fast asleep with no plans to become concious again until he thought his books were in danger.

He brushed the dust off a blank canvas and set it on the easel. It was facing out the small window, revealing the expanses of space for Crowley to record again and again. He hesitated a moment before changing the angle of the easel, pointing it towards the bed where Azirphale was still curled up.

He looked over at where his brush had been reverently placed on the nightstand at contrast with everything else he'd been wearing previously. He looked at it and then shook his head. He opened a pot of red paint and dipped his fingers into it. The excess dripped from the tips before Crowley set then to the canvas, and he began to paint.

#good omens #good omens swap au #ineffable husbands #ineffable partners #crowley #aziraphale #good omens crowley #good omens fic

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37q · 4 years

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i started writing this post when kai n i woke up at 7:15 for her to go to work. i had a bad dream. it was a nightmare even though it was all around nice. i had to keep looking out for somebody who never turned out to be there. i dont remember the first part, which was when i was supposed to be looking for this person. i was supposed to pick him up, along with another girl whom i did pick up. it was a suburban neighborhood, and then sometimes a neighborhood of townhomes. it was late afternoon, and then dusk, and then cold night. it rained. sometimes a schoolbus would drive by. i think there may have been an event going on across town, and i was this girls chauffeur for it all day. she was very busy. i never saw her face nor her, just the time in my car when she wasnt there.

the next morning my brother was visiting. he had the flu, so then kai and i did. kai and i lived in my parents house (they didnt live their anymore, i suppose), it seems like. we mightve even slept on their waterbed. one entire wall of our bedroom and the space about 2 feet out from it was a case, it had bookshelves of movies and stuff. maybe an old tv set? i have a recollection of something with a cartoon caspar the ghost on the cover. we were bed ridden for a while. i forget where kai went, but she just wasnt there much. my brother and i hung out. it was melancholy, in hind sight, because starting the first week of january i wont see him for 20 weeks straight, and usually we would try to see each other every two weeks or even less sometimes. when we hang out, we get coffee. in the gentle morning light we walked through the city, a hillier and greener version of baltimore, looking for a coffee shop. lots of beautiful urban topography. conversations weve had in the past slipping between us. ubiquitous police presence. so, run-of-the-mill baltimore. we were in line for one, and as we approached the counter i saw a newly-wed couple behind us in line. i mean, still in gown and suit. i began singing something at them, and then they and everyone around started singing with me. im gonna be honest, that isnt much of a stretch from my real life behavior :/ i dont remember what we got, but i was really envious of the tiny pastries they had for sale in the case. the coffee shop was like, in the bannisters of a hall, a lecture-hall style terraced seating area, with a stage in the center sitting far below the top of the highest row of chairs. the coffeeshop was off to the side, the same altitude as the aforemention row of chairs. we left, i dont remember if we even got anything. i dont think we did get anything. the entirety of the dream before this im in communication with my psychiatrist as i navigate some large campus, and she wants to sext but is nervous about initiating it. i certainly didnt want to. so while my brother and i are hanging out she texts me, saying "i have an idea" "whats youe favorite coffee place" and im like oh god she wants to meet in person over this. however, before i can think anything, my fingers instinctually flit over the keys on my phone screen to type "not zeke's". sighs. my brother and i do more walking. the sun is right overhead but our skin is thankful for it. theres a soft, warm wind in our faces. were walking briskly, my anxiety spurring us on. we cross some horticultural landscape, going from one catty-corner to the next. we come to a coffeeshop thats reminiscent of a coffeeshop in the city, near mount vernon. it has the word arabica somewhere in the name in the dream, though. i receive a text from my psychiatrist. "good, they never have a good selection of african roasts." were on the sidewalk across a street about as immense as charles street is looking into the coffeeshop. my psychiatrist is already there, turned away thankfully, adding her fixins into her drink. i tell ian we need to leave (before she notices me). i was too ashamed to tell him about our potential arrangement, even if i wasnt exactly excited about it. the air around our bodies cools down, an overcast creeping in, and my nose can smell rain in the future. thank tara, we get out of there. we never did get our coffee :(

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dahyeri · 6 years

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I don’t know why the sunset seems so scary to me right now

I keep looking out of my window and looking at the sun and feeling angry at it. I think it’s because when the sun sets, I know that that’s just another day gone by and time still moves like nothing ever happened... it moves and things become more final

I can’t say i’m surprised about how much this has affected me. I used to be one of those people that when a celebrity died i couldn’t empathise with the people that had followed them closely, were their ‘biggest fans’ and what not. I’d always think “It’s sad..... but how can someone feel that distraught over someone they don’t even know?”

But Jonghyun meant a lot to me. Not in the way that he would to people who know him, I’m obviously no comparison, but people touch our lives in so many different ways and he really touched mine. My life for the past 5 years has been full of lots of ups and downs, and even in the worst times I was able to look to shinee and jonghyun for solace. I also felt a lot of pride for the work he did, he always put so much effort and love and devotion and dedication and heart into everything he did and music meant so much to him and you could just feel it everytime you listened to his songs, and i would always take that feeling with me and use it to make me feel better.

I guess it breaks my heart to think he thought leaving this way was the only option. And sometimes when i’m crying i feel selfish in that theres real people that knew him and who were in his life that are grieving right now and i’m just a stupid girl sobbing in my room somewhere and he’ll never know who i am. I’m not surprised by the fact that i’m upset over this, I’m more surprised about the....feeling? I never expected something like this to hit me so hard. And it’s difficult when you feel its unjustified, you have such a horrible heartbroken feeling, you can’t sleep, you can’t eat, you constantly cry and everything makes you angry just by the sight of it existing, but then what use is it? I actually have a take home exam i’m supposed to be doing right now. I’m in the middle of finals but I just can’t function properly but of course he was never a family member, or a friend to me so I have to be expected to just move through it because i have no excuse. But he really felt like a friend. I remember looking through my posts today and finding a photo of him from maybe a couple of years ago, and one of my tags said ‘he looks like he could give me a really nice really warm hug’ and i believe it. He alwayed inspired he every time he spoke, i would always read quotes from blue night and be shocked by just how eloquent and thoughtful is in everything he says. He gave so much love to the people around hime, even to those he didn’t know well, but i can’t stop thinking about how he couldn’t afford himself the same privilege tw suicide/death

and everytime i think of him i cant help but think about how lonely he must have been at that moment. Sometimes its just one simple spur of the moment thought that makes people do it and then they’re thankful someone came and saved them in the knick of time and then they live long, good lives and it just makes me sad and angry that this didnt happen to him that he stood there in that moment and whether he was afraid or not he still went through with it and i cant even image how painful it must have been... and even the hours and days and weeks leading up until that moment, was he ever happy? sometimes there are things in life that can be that spark to make you keep going, and i see so many of those things in his life but obviously the pain was too great. i guess the sunset makes me angry because i know it means he’s just getting colder and there won’t be any warmth in that body anymore and whether you believe in heaven or a second life or anything of that kind i feel like it doesnt matter because of how final it all is.

And there’s a certain kind of..dissonance to all that i see of him and what he did. I’ve watched funny videos of him to make myself feel better, to see him happy and laughing and making others laugh but then as soon as it ends i am struck with the though of him killing himself and i can’t stop shaking. such a beautiful person shouldn’t ever be related to such horrific acts this never should have happened to him

i find it harder when someone you hear the voice of everyday, see so many times is the one to go, because their presence is so normal and you feel like you’ve taken advantage of it. i feel like i’ve taken advantage of it. I’m not really a mourning person, death hasn’t really touched my life and when my grandma died i didnt cry. i guess i was really young and couldn’t quite understand death at that time, but now with jonghyun the years of my life that i spent knowing him were some of the hardest, and losing him has ben like losing some of the ground underneath that i stand on and i can’t pick myself up I still can’t believe it. I’m the kind of person that actively seeks out information on these things, it seems self destructive but i would rather look at things on my own terms than be caught off guard by a stray facebook post i never wanted to see. And there’s so many regrets i have and so many thoughts that i can’t stop thinking about at the same time. I keep thinking about how much pain he must have been in at that moment, i think of his sister and how much she has to carry with her now for the rest of her life, i think about the possibility of how if they had just been that bit faster maybe he’d still be here, i keep thinking about shinee and when they must have last saw jonghyun, what did they say? was it something they regretted?, how they’ll make it through the next days, months, years, i think of his mother and everything she must be feeling. I just have so many thoughts and each one is worse than the next but then i think about my role in it all and i cant help it. I think about how i was studying while he killed himself, how i had a slight headache when they found him, how i was probably laughing at a joke somewhere across the city while this was all happening. I wonder why i dismissed going to his concert when i had the chance, “nah, i’ll wait till the full shinee concert” and think did i take him for granted? i loved him, but did i love him enough? And to say you ‘love’ someone in this context is so strange, because theyre not directly part of youre life and yet you feel so close to them. For a long time i loved how he helped me when i needed it, i loved how funny he was in his dopey silly way, i loved his voice and the emotion that flowed through it, i loved his smile that i thought “i want to see this, up close someday”, i love how incredibly intelligent he was and i always thought i’d found someone i could look up to and strive to be like. I loved the love he gave to others, including myself, but i feel selfish for taking everything he had to give and leaving him empty. I didn’t want to write this in past tense, but i guess i had to. Seeing things like death date on his profile makes everything so surreal. I think “but, this can’t happen to him, it’s jonghyun” or “there must be some mistake”. I look at the words “died” over and over and over again until i cry and cry and then i look away only to look back again and do the same. It still doesn’t feel real, it feels real and yet it doesn’t I want to be positive like other people have, and say that i’m happy for the time that he was in my life. But i can’t help but think of what he was going through at this time. It feels like i had years and years to do something, anything, but i know this what out of my hands which makes me feel worse and helpless. I really am not the kind of person to write things like this at all. Again, i never understood why people did this when celebrities died but now i know. i know too well. My heart aches in ways i never thought it would and even with how much i’ve said it doesn’t even begin to scratch the surface of what i’m feeling. I also hate being here, its the first time that i’ve truly hated being in seoul. I didnt want to go outside because all i could see is the snow that came down yesterday and it reminded me of him, i don’t want to see people going on with their lives, i don’t want to see the daily routine of things and time passing by. I feel like i can just shut myself in my room and grieve in my own space because thats the only way i know how to cope. But when i look out my window, and i see the road near my house, and i know that if i followed that road, if i just kept following it and all of it twists and different streets then i know i would end up where he is, where they all are, and i just which i wasnt constantly aware of its existence. Some part of me wants to go there, to just stand outside so theres some kind of finality and closure but i don’t know if that would make it worse. i dont know what will make it better. i dont know what ‘it’ is but whatever it is it hurts. This is a kind of shock i’ve never experienced, and i’m trying hard to validate my feelings. i’m trying to take care of myself but who knew that would be so difficult too? I guess my main feelings right now are anger and fear. Anger for the pain he was in all these years, anger for what he felt he had to do to himself, anger at everyone and everything, rational or irrational i am just angry. And i fear what comes next. I’m scared of all the things people have to say, i’m scared of the funeral to come, i’m scared of turning the tv on and seeing the news and becoming acutely aware of the reality of it all, i’m scared about what lives will be like after this, i’m scared of my own feelings and how to cope with them. Obviously things get better with time, but not for everyone. I admit i’m a sensitive person, i often think and cry about the day my dog will die because of how old he is and how much he means to me. So i wonder now that i will be part of the unfortunate category of people that never recover from these things. and you might think “i know you’re hurting right now, and that’s why you feel this way. but give it time and you’ll look back at yourself and just feel sad that you felt this way”. But i know myself, and i know my feelings. I know how things affect me, and i felt this, and still feel it, so deep inside myself that i don’t think it will go away anytime soon. I wonder when i will stop crying, or i at least wonder when i will be able to function properly. I’m aware that i could fall back into mild depression, i’m at a dangerous point where this incident is combined with the fact that i have most of my major exams and i can’t fail them but with what im feeling i havent been able to do anything and i just feel like i cant muster enough of my energy to care. How have i preoccupied the entire 10 or so hours ive been awake with nothing but thought of him? with nothing but tears for him? It’s sadder now knowing when these things happened, when i was on the brink or at my lowest i always turned to him, and to shinee. i guess its ironic now. This is so dumb and emotional but i just want to scream!!! and cry and weep and sob and i have to get it out otherwise it just hurts too much. The words ‘hurt’ and ‘pain’ i’ve used too much i know but until i have better words to describe what i’m feeling, what has happened, then i’ll be using them

Remember 1of1? it feels kind of cruel now to think they went off a concept based solely on them being a whole unified unit of 5.

Is it karma? to think that while jonghyun was suffering, and i was taking his voice and his music and his thoughts and feelings with me and using them for my own gains, that the only thing i was ever thinking was “i hope shinee never disbands. I don’t know what i’d do without them. i’m so so scared of that day, what would i do after that?”. It seems so small now. I was scared of how i would feel when they parted ways but still lives long happy lives, so now my feelings are so beyond that that im struggling to conceptualise them. It’s difficult for people with mental health issues. We invest our feelings in things that we think will help us through hard times, and even as i think about it i dont think there was anything else that i invested my feelings in. it was always shinee. Theres a certain kind of joy you feel when you engage with things that comfort you thats unlike anything else, its like a big sigh or exhale of breathe and a feeling that you can just forget about everything and just be in the moment with them. Jonghyun always made me feel that way, no matter what.

I’m still trying to express the magnitude of what i feel right now but i can’t..... i would probably type for hours but it still won’t cut it. I see pictures of his face and i have mixed reactions because i know hes gone but i feel like he isnt. I see his pictures everyday, so how is today any different? my brain can’t comprehend the difference and i’m scared about what will happen when it does.

But i won’t feel stupid anymore for how i’m feeling. It’s justified, and its justified for everyone else. I just wish other people could see that so i didnt feel so alone

I don’t want to say goodbye. Even typing that i feel silly, but i just wish he knew how loved he was. I want to pick myself up and imagine him in a better place somehow but its hard. I want to look at the sunset again and not find it so incredibly terrifying, i want to walk outside again and not have to think about how you’ll never have the feeling of the cold on your fingers when the wind gets too strong, or how you’ll never see the snow fall again and settle on the trees, or how you’ll never see that sunset and think “what a good day it was to live”. Why is it so unfair that i have to see these things and know you never will again.

I loved him so much, i love him so much. and i’m so so so sorry for absolutely everything. i’m so incredibly sorry. I hope you feel better now and know so many people love you, i love you i love you You did well.

#i feel like i just had to externalise things #ive talked to people but i feel like i can't fully dump on them without feeling bad or without them understanding #personal #don't know how to move on

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fan-clan-fun · 7 years

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Journey Au Plotline

So I have a general idea of plotline and changing the dynamics of the journey that they make. No longer will they go to Midnight, instead the entire purpose of their journey is to reach the tribe, who will then direct them to the place where they came from.

On the way however, they run into the new Skyclan and teach them a few basics of clan life. I intend to use some of the characters from Firestar’s quest, but with a few plot twists.

Anyway, so the same cats are chosen to go on the journey by Starclan, Feathertail (who brings Stormfur), Tawnypelt, Brambleclaw,Squirrelpaw (who tags along and the other cats dont like it) and Crowpaw (who becomes Crowstep). But the relationships are different, and the characters will be redone (so that there is more solid characterization and in depth history). Characterization and relationships will be addressed in specific posts for each one.

Basic Structure:

-- Clans have begun to lose cats to humans and starvation, and are struggling to make it through after the war with Bloodclan. When Tigerstar disappears, the clans have to acknowledge that not even Starclan has power over humans.

--The clans send their medicine cats for a special meeting to the Moonstone, telling them to consult their ancestors. Unlike normally they get no visions (flashes of potential futures which may or may not come true), but Starclan does warn the clans that unless they choose from within their ranks and send them out, the only possible futures end in darkness, the clans are lost. They tell the clans to go back to their roots. The Mountains which touch the stars, there they will find their answer.

--Within the clans there is much debate over who to send. And each leader makes a careful choice. Most are half-clan, which helps them connect more easily with outsiders. Crowpaw is the exception, but since his clan was the most affected by the war with Bloodclan and the previous war with Shadowclan, they are hesitant to send anyone. In the end he is chosen because he is strong and mature for an apprentice, and the clan can probably manage without him. Stormfur goes along as extra protection, and since Riverclan is the biggest of the clans, they don't need his help, or his extra mouth to feed. Squirrelpaw however, is a stow away. When they find out she has snuck out to come with them, they are too far away to send her home. Besides she is too stubborn. Squirrelflight is the cat who undergoes the biggest character change, as she grows from an egoistic and stubborn teen, to a brave, energetic, and humble adult.

--Once they set out on their journey, they encounter new situations they aren't used to. Past Mother mouth is their first obstacle, a huge two leg place which takes several days to get through. They encounter friends and foes, and when they reach the other side they are met by Sky, and his small band of misfits, who have only just begun establishing a clan. As part of the rebuilding of this universe, I will be looking at real regions in the US (as I wish to keep the Sharpclaw as a plot point) to determine a more feasible territory for Skyclan, and a more believable set up for the journey’s pathway.

--They stay with the new Skyclan, and the Warriors help teach the young impressionable new cats (many of which are kittypets) the importance of warrior life. Their example spurs many of the “daylight warriors” (which I will redevelop), to become full members and helps Sky establish some credentials and validity to his notion of clan when the Warriors successfully fight off an attack by nearby strays in the city.

-- After they leave Sky’s Clan, they move increasingly toward the mountains, becoming lost in a forest and facing a crucible as a team.

--Eventually they reach the mountains, where they find a struggling small community of cats called the Tribe. They have lost a few cats to the cougar/mountain lion which recently took up residence. Since red is a rare color in the tribe, and ticked tabby is non-existent, they latch on to Squirrelpaw as the cat they believe will save them. They are not as pitiful as in canon but they are highly superstitious and see her as an omen.

--Meanwhile the other clan cats are trying to figure out how to get past the mountain lion. The leader of the tribe had told them that they came from the land of the rising sun, and that their ancestors brought them here to a place of safety during a great trial. They settled claimed the mountains as their home, but maybe the sunrise land could be the clans new home. But to get there required getting rid of the mountain lion.

--Together the warriors and Tribe cats figure out how to kill the mountain lion, but Stormfur is injured in the attempt and breaks a leg. The others decide to head on to the possible territory with the promise to pick him up on the way back once he has recovered.

--At this point they have been traveling over a moon and it still takes them time to head down the mountains and find the new territory.

--They explore the area until they find territory suited for each clan just to be sure that this is a suitable home. Once they are satisfied they head back.

--The journey back is quicker, as they hurry to make it home. They only pause at the tribe long enough to find that Stormfur, although closer to healed has fallen in love with a tribe cat, and has decided to remain as the new Stoneteller of the tribe to help them rebuild and grow. And they spend barely a night with Skyclan.

--Sky helps them find a way back which goes around the city instead of through it, but they almost get lost because some of their landmarks have been destroyed.

--Sky actually returns with them as a guide and helps convince the clans that there are places where they can live and live healthy. In fact all the elders which might have stayed behind find the strength to come and actually join Sky's little clan, even if they can't make the full journey.

--All four clans band together and journey on. The journey with the clans takes longer than the original one, although the time going through the city is cut out.

--They stay in Sky's camp only a few days, the over cramped conditions and the differences between the clan cats and new kittypets/rogues in Sky's attempt at a clan cause tensions to grow. However some cats, mostly elders, decide to stay with Sky as the territory is vibrant and green and some cats do not think they can make the journey over the mountains.

-- The pass through the mountains is just as dangerous as in canon, and they do lose a few cats. When they arrive near Tribe territory, they are met by Stoneteller Stormfur. Unfortunately the Tribe’s camp cannot fit the combined numbers of the clans, but Stoneteller allows them to rest and hunt on their territory as long as they do not cause any trouble.

--Eventually they reach the new territory (still figuring out what that looks like), and define each clans territory. There is a lot of awkward partings, and for many moons, none of the clans instigate any fights or battles, as the memory of shared experiences is strong.

So yeah thats it for now in very vague terms. Next project are characters and character sketches.

#Thejourneymatters #warriors

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electoons · 7 years

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for the fallout oc ask!! : 19, 26, 40, 46, and 47 (I hope that's not too many aahhH)

AAHH NO THIS IS AWESOME THANK U

19. What natural alignment are they? (ex. Lawful Good, Chaotic Evil)

Chaotic Good shes the paragon, the incarnation, the embodiment of chaotic good

26. How do they come off to others? What first impression do they usually make?

depending on the situation in which the other person first sees her, usually either “aw what a sweet girl, that’s so nice of her to help me” or, more often, “what the fuck is wrong with her” (like, in any context, whether dragging a soldier’s corpse across the desert to bring to his wife, or digging through garbage, or wearing mantis gauntlets on both hands and trying to pick things up with them, or casually inserting herself into conversations she has no business being in, or spitting off the roof of the Lucky 38, or sleeping with the guy who shot her, or whatever else she does)

40. Thoughts on death if any? (ex. Fear it, accept it)

aw well she’s kind of…like, both fears it and accepts it, if that makes sense? like she’s cheated death so many times that at this point she’s like ‘lmao my luck has to run out eventually’ and kind of …prepares herself for it, basically, and tbh at sometimes it feels like she’s tempting fate just to see if she CAN actually die but apparently someone Up There is watching over her so she just kind of runs headlong into danger, figuring welp it’s the wasteland everyone dies eventually

but at the same time she loves her friends so much and has such a strong will to survive that she also has that lil fear in the back of her head at all times, like hmm maybe i should chill

46. How do they sleep? Are they picky about where and how or can they sleep basically anywhere?

ok this is my fav tbh because cici DOESNT tbh and will keep moving until she runs out of gas basically and relies on sunset sarsaparilla and pure adrenaline to keep her awake, her companions usually need to beg her to just like…stop and chill for a bit bc its night time and they need to sleep bc thats what humans do? but often she has trouble sleeping and will usually stay up all night and will eventually pass out somewhere along their journey, on whatever relatively flat surface she can find, for a few hours

47. What’s their favorite radio station and song? (post-apocalypse)

she loves mr. new vegas more than anything, ever, and listens to RNV religiously, and of course I’ve Got Spurs is her favorite, which causes all her friends to completely revile it, she also loves Big Iron (she fancies herself a cowboy evn tho shes a poser), and Why Don’t You Do Right (she strives to reach the sassiness and coolness of Peggy Lee)

#this was so fun sorry it took so long!!!aaaa #oc tag #cici ventura #courier six #fnv #irlbigfoot

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zouanor · 7 years

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Charlotte and I left Leeds on December 2nd.

It gave me a week to make a mess out of my apartment to figure out what I was packing. It gave me time to figure out which neighbor was going to pick up my mail. It also gave me enough time to clean out my fridge and get rid of anything that could get moldy.

It was planned that Niall was also staying in Sheffield to finish up some school stuff before the winter break. I made him promise that if he needed me, only if it was an emergency, to text me… other wise he could just watch my instagram or anything else i post stuff too.

I didn’t know how Charlotte managed to make sure I didn’t get scheduled to work until the 12th. I mean, I knew I had some days off in between, but for my sister to make sure I wasn’t working then? Amazing.

When I got home from Edinburgh with Niall, two days later Charlotte had came over and we talked it out. She apologized, saying that everything around my birthday was stressing her out. And while I didn’t want to fully believe that, I did.

Trust me, it still bothered me.

For the first few days in Spain we decided first to go into Barcelona. Our main goal was Madrid, but since Charlotte planned us a week and a half, we decided to add Barcelona.

I don’t regret that decision one bit.

Somehow Charlotte had put up with me going to different art museums as long as I went shopping with her. It was an offer I couldn’t refuse.

Not to even mention the beaches, oh my god the beaches were beautiful.

If I could live on the beaches of Barcelona, I would.

Except for the people who decided to go nude, that was a no. I mean, I was comfortable in my own body and I was glad that they were too, but I wasn’t sure if I could handle people seeing me naked in such a way and in such a public place.

In general, it meant that from December 3rd to December 7th, we stayed in Barcelona. From the 8th until the 11th, we were heading to Madrid.

“Rosie, this is amazing… Thank you for choosing Madrid.” Charlotte sighed dreamily. We were finishing up our last day in Barcelona, touring the Mountain of Montserrat and little small towns.

“Char, we’re still in Barcelona for the night… we don’t head to Madrid until tomorrow, remember?” I giggled a bit.

We linked our arms together so neither of us would get lost. Thankfully it was also useful to help each of us push the other to walk the steep hill incline.

“Rosie, I was wondering if tonight you could braid my hair? I need to tame the fro before I get stuck in something.”

“Box braids or?”

“Plain braids will be fine.”

Montserrat is beautiful. Between the architecture and structure to the mountains surrounding it, I didn’t know where to look. And the view, god the view from up here of all Barcelona just made me wish I would never leave Barcelona, let alone Spain.

I was going to make sure I came back to Barcelona more often, when I had the time.

We stayed around here for a few more hours until heading back onto the main ground and finding dinner.

Later we went back to our hotel room for the night, getting into our pajamas and finding movies on the TV that had English translations for us.

It was full on sleepover, the two of us doing each others hair and eating whatever snacks we had left over until we go shopping more.

“Have you actually got anything planned when we’re in Madrid? Or are we just winging it?”

“Winging it Rosie, I told you I’d get you here, but not what we’re doing. All I know is that on your actual birthday, we’re going drinking.”

“A full night yeah?”

“Find someone for the night -”

“You trying to call us a fit bird for men?” I shrieked.

That was not what I wanted.

“No! If you’d let me finish, I said find someone for the night to be our best friend! I don’t want to be someone’s - no Rosie.” Charlotte sighed.

After that serious little moment, both of us had started laughing at the thought. I didn’t mean it to be like that, but how she started off her sentence made me feel that way.

Both of us went to bed maybe fifteen minutes later, snuggling under the sheets. I didn’t know how much sleep I would get considering I was practically ready for Madrid.

~~~

While I was excited for Madrid, I was dreading it.

Charlotte and I decided that we wouldn’t have a rental car because of the gas money and just stopping constantly. While that would’ve been easier, we chose against it.

Instead, we took the train. We found out that the train would be faster than driving six hours in a car, so either way, we were lucky.

For those two and a half hours, Charlotte and I mainly slept. Of course at every stop in between we were awake by the bustling of people coming on or off.

I found myself staying awake after the third try of trying to sleep. While Charlotte was able to sleep again, I managed to find scrap pieces of paper, only to crumble it into little paper balls and throw them at her.

When Charlotte woke up however, she found a huge pile of paper balls surrounding her. At first she was confused, but once she saw me trying not to laugh, she glared. Whatever paper balls she could reach, she threw back at me.

Reaching Madrid, we grabbed our bags and left the train. We had to first go into our hotel and check in. What I wanted to do was just rest up completely in a hotel room from the train ride, but I didn’t know what Charlotte wanted to do.

Charlotte wanted to do a mini tour of the city instead of relaxing.

Go figure.

“We should plan another sibling trip.. Obviously the two of us but also add Liam and Louis. Because all of us are siblings and we deserve a trip.” Charlotte said randomly.

“That sounds nice. I’m sure Liam would agree. Where do you think we’d go off too?”

We linked our arms together to walk around the busy streets. We didn’t need to get lost on our first day.

“Do you think Athens would be cool? What about Brussels? Maybe Thailand or Singapore? What about South Africa?”

“Charlotte we cannot be around the world in eighty days. But, I like the idea of Thailand though. It seems different than what we normally do. We’ve just gotta save more money because most of it has gone to Belize you know?”

Charlotte flinched a bit. She shrugged it off quickly hoping that I wouldn’t have noticed.

I did.

“Anyways, I think maybe March would be interesting? Only because, like you said, we have Belize after the wedding until June something.”

“Charlotte, March? That’s not giving me enough time to save more money than I have for a trip! Why not make it for Liam’s Birthday?”

“Fair point, Rosie.”

“But I like the idea, Charlotte. Maybe Liam could give out his own ideas on where he’d like to go? Only because if we said Thailand and he wouldn’t go, then that isn’t fair for him. We’d all have to agree basically.”

“Fine, Rosie. I get it now. C’mon, I read online that somewhere they have this good ice cream parlor.”

~~~

December 9th was the day we actually toured the city much more in depth than yesterday.

The two of us found a vendor on the streets of Madrid that was near Plaza De Espana and decided to sit down and snack there. The fountain itself was spectacular with how beautiful it was. And with everyone freely walking up to the statues like it wasn’t a big deal, that amazed me.

There was another fountain behind the one we sat at, but this was calmer and more along the lines of comfortable seating.

“So, hows that invisible boy of yours.” Charlotte asked randomly, her eyebrow raising.

“You mean the one thats actually real? He’s good. He’s finishing up some school stuff.” I shrugged my shoulders.

“I still can’t believe you haven’t brought him around to us.”

“Because I know you lot.”

“That doesn’t mean anything. S’not like he’s your boyfriend or anything.”

“No, Lots, he’s my best friend. You guys will get to see him soon, anyways.”

“Right, on instagram only?”

“No. He’s my date at the wedding, so ha!” I sounded like a four-year-old. Great.

“Well, did he even tell you happy birthday?”

“We’ve already celebrated my birthday before you and I left. We went to Edinburgh on the spur of the moment.”

I made a face once I heard Charlotte gasp.

“You went to Edinburgh?”

“Of course I did! It was a nice evening and nothing of the sort that I need to explain to you.”

“But just tell me the restaurant is still there?”

“It’s still there Charlotte.”

Charlotte dropped the subject after a few minutes of silence. We threw away our mess and headed off touring, crossing onto Puente De Segovia. We stopped on the bridge though, looking at the platform in the middle of the river.

Throughout the day we stopped at different places. And of course, us being two people who’ve never been here, we took a lot of silly photos. So yes, we were targeted at typical tourists.

We heard of this little spot named Plaza De San Ildefonso that comes to live at night, with music and art and different foods. Charlotte and I didn’t even need to say anything to know thats what we both wanted to do.

That was the place to be to not show off that you were a tourist.

The restaurant we decided to eat at was crowded, but thankful to find us a place to sit. We both ordered drinks and while we waited and ate, we watched the crowd of people just have fun.

“Do you think they’d know that we can’t dance if we joined them?”

“I’m sure they’d help us out.”

We finished eating, but stayed for another drink and some dessert. The two of us just talked about stuff again, just random things about what was going on when we get home.

Charlotte had some things to do with Cissy or they were off to go somewhere. I didnt pay attention, I was over Cissy at the moment. Not that was said in a mean way, I just couldn’t handle Cissy at the time being.

Myself on the other hand, it was back to work to make up of lost time since being here. I was sure I had to work on Christmas, so I had to mentally prepare myself for that.

But also, I had to reunite with my friends.This was being such a fun week that even though I was having the time of my life, I really missed them the most.

I hoped that since i’ve been gone, Alexa was keeping Niall in check of his homework and his senior thesis, along with keeping up with hers. So far they hadn’t had to call me, so that’s a good thing.

Maybe I’ll make a small phone call to them later… Wait, to Alexa since she’d be the most responsible one at the time being.

“Rosie, c’mon let’s go find someone to help us dance!”

“I hope they’re prepared for your two left feet.” I laughed.

Charlotte took my hand as she pulled me through the crowd. We reached outside and it was time for Charlotte to bring out her charm, trying to find someone help the poor girl out.

Also I was thankful she didn’t hear my comment.

We stopped at the grass line and both of us took in the scene. This whole view just made me wish Leeds would do something like this.

Charlotte took a leap of faith, deciding to leave me in my spot to go dance. Without a doubt, she had found someone to help her out and show her the way. I wasn’t surprised, Charlotte had that look and aura to do something like that.

Being a good sister, I managed to get some pictures of her from where I was at with her laughing and just dancing.

I found a seat somewhere where I can keep an eye on Charlotte. Not that I didn’t trust these people, but i’ve watched my fair share of Taken and those other shows.

Call me crazy for it, but I’m keeping my eye on her.

It wasn’t too long before I saw someone coming my way. I had to pretend not to notice until the guy was standing in front of me, a soft smile on his face that I knew was sincere.

“The girl in the braids said you’d like to dance. Would you like too?”

“She did, did she?” I beamed, causing the guy to laugh.

“It’s better than sitting here. I promise no harm or anything.” He did this thing that reminded me of a ‘scouts honor’.

So, I got up with the guy. It was all for fun while being here. That’s all that mattered.

Just for one night, we had the time of our lives and this was a memory I wouldn’t forget.

~~~

My birthday.

I was 24 years old today.

Charlotte woke me up by jumping on me.

I also woke up to some text messages, even though I told everyone not to message me because I wouldn’t know when I’d get to them.

But alas, no one listened.

“So today for your birthday we’re just going to have a spa day and order room service and maybe find a club tonight. But definitely a spa day. I already looked downstairs and the hotel offers a spa treatment.”

Charlotte was rambling on and on to the point where I shook my head to wake myself up more a little bit.

“Charlotte, let me get up please. My mind can’t process this at the minute.”

Charlotte rolled off of me, sitting on my bed as I sat up and stretched. I gathered my thoughts and comprehended everything around me, I was able to look at Charlotte with a look on my face that said ‘okay’.

“Spa day and room service. Anything else I’m getting today?” I asked, flattening the blanket in front of me.

“Not sure yet, maybe going to a club? Maybe find a beach? Whatever you want to do honestly.” Charlotte shrugged.

“How about spa day and we just hang about here? I really need just a relaxation day before we head home tomorrow.”

“Deal.”

“But first, I need to shower.”

I shoved Charlotte off of the bed so that I could get up. After hearing a thud and her glaring at me I started laughing. It was little times like this that reminded me of when we were younger, of just the two of us (mainly me) laughing at each other.

I was in and out of the shower in less than fifteen minutes. Since it was going to be a lazy day at the hotel room, I grabbed another set of pajamas and put those on. I over-packed so I was thankful for having more clothes than needed.

Charlotte was already snuggled up into my bed waiting for me to join her. At the current moment, it just seemed like she already turned the TV on and waiting for me to find something on.

“I called room service for breakfast. I got you waffles with strawberries? Is that okay? I got tea also because I don’t know what else there is and I know youre not a huge fan of orange juice.”

“Charlotte, it’s fine. Tea and waffles are fine with me. Thank you.”

No sooner had I told her it was fine, breakfast came for us.

Let me tell you, it was delicious.

I tried to eat as slow as I could to savor every last bit of my breakfast, but I couldn’t when it was so good.

The rest of the morning was spent with the two of us watching TV and questioning every bit of it, at one point even muting it and making our own dialogue to make it more interesting.

My mum would be proud of us just being silly and getting long and that we were talking.

By the early afternoon, we were still in our pajamas, only this time we were hustling around. Charlotte was up my ass trying to get me prepared to head downstairs and towards the spa.

She was actually pushing me too.

But in fairness, I was glad I was getting this spa thing. After all of the shit i’ve been going though so far, I really deserved it. I mean, dealing with secrets from everyone about being a girlfriend to not even knowing how I felt about him to everything that apparently was fine with my dad. I just really needed this.

And let me tell you, once she put the first face mask on I knew the rest of today was going to be a good day.

~~~

Later that night we ordered up some ice cream with syrup and caramel sauce and anything else that could skyrocket my sugar and get me going hyper.

It was nearing ten PM around this time, so we knew we had to shut up, but we couldn’t stop laughing.

I was laughing too hard from the sugar with the combination of something Charlotte was trying to show me. I had to roll off my bed just to make it to the bathroom before I peed my pants. And I did not need Charlotte or anyone else knowing that I did that if it were to happen (and thankfully it didnt might I add).

I made it to the bathroom and I could hear Charlotte tripping around and the sound of a phone going off. I didn’t want to make more noise than I was with flushing and the water running even after I washed my hands. But there was a lot of muffling around that I could hear.

I couldn’t hear all of it, but I could hear Charlotte let out a little sigh and maybe a little cry? I couldn’t tell if it was a cry or laugh in the first place.

I stayed put, listening to whatever I could if Charlotte even spoke again. But when I didn’t hear her say anything else and dead silent, I backed away from the door, finished what I had already done and made my appearance again.

I pretended not to notice the sad look on her face as I walked around the bed before getting into my bed. This was the last night we were here in Madrid and instead of it being so glamorous it seemed by just that phone call it had simmered down into hell.

Charlotte quickly got into bed and didn’t turn to look at me. She didn’t even mutter a goodnight.

Within a phone call our amazing time had changed into awkward sadness and I didn’t like it at all.

1 note · View note

notthetoothfairy · 7 years

Text

He’s Got You High

For @a-simple-rainbow. ♥♥♥

She wanted something based on this post: Kurt sends an email to his TA while high on pain meds after a wisdom teeth extraction.

read on AO3

Blaine is in the middle of his theatre history class when his phone signals a new email in his inbox. Discreetly hiding the phone from his instructor’s view by keeping his hands behind a stack of textbooks on his desk, he goes to his email folder and checks the sender.

It reads, Kurt Hummel.

He has to bite his tongue to stop the smile forming on his lips. Kurt is a sophomore, only a year behind Blaine, and takes improv and stage combat class with Blaine. He’s also a student in one of Mme Tibideaux’s more advanced voice studio classes that Blaine miraculously got to be the TA for this year.

To say that Kurt is Blaine’s favorite student would be an understatement – in fact, hopelessly crushing on him is probably more accurate.

It’s not like Blaine is planning to do anything about it, at least not while he’s Kurt’s TA. It would be inappropriate, unprofessional, and probably also really awkward, especially if Kurt isn’t interested.

So, he’s not fooling himself into thinking that Kurt’s email will be anything out of the ordinary. Probably a note of absence or questions about the final exam… though, as Blaine notices with a frown, the subject reads “Paper Eggstension”. Autocorrect maybe? There’s no way Kurt’s spelling is that bad, Blaine has read and graded most of his MUS105 papers.

Glancing at the teacher to ensure he’s still unobserved, Blaine opens the email, intrigued and a bit concerned now. He scans the first few lines and – oh, wow.

Everyone at NYADA knows Kurt is full of surprises and he’s certainly made an impression on Blaine more than once but this…? This has Blaine blushing, giggling under his breath, shaking his head fondly and wanting to check up on Kurt all at once.

To: Blaine Anderson

From: Kurt Hummel

Subject: Paper Eggstension

---

Dear Mr. Blaine,

sry, I forgot your last name because Rachel calls you Mr. Dreamboat! And y would I use your last name anyway? You told us to call you Blaine. Thats a nice name. Blaiiiine.

You said other stuff too. Like that we could send you our MUS105 paper before we send it to Mme Tibidibideaux (I wish she let us call her Blaine too) but only if we dont miss the deadline. Now I gotta tell you: No can-do. But I have an excuse!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I know you don’t believe. But you should. Cuz Blaine, u see – I got my teeth removed. The smarty ones. The wisdom teat. Anyway. I got them out. It was brutality. So much pain, worse than when I watched you unfairly lose Midmight Madnesssss against that senior douche, whatever the fuck his name is again. You should have won Blaine. You were better. I think Rachel bribe the judge bc she went out with senior douche… what is hid name? Bobby? Barney?

But PLEASE could I get a few more days, could you ask Mme T.…??? I really wanna do well bc… you see, Mme T., she scares the hell out of me. Ha that rhymes, triple! Cuz I’m awesome. Yes, I am. You can just accept that as fact or you can also go out wih me and see how awesome I am for yourself, your choice (but pick the latter!). But anyway please please pls pls pls can I hand it the paper a bit later? I really cant submit something bad -- and Im afraid they pulled out my brain with the teeth!!!!!!!! I can’t write a well paper without a brain!

My doctor says Ill regret writing emails while Im hai (thats German for shark, funny fact) so I’m gonna stop and hope that you will say yes! Please bro? Oh! Brody. Brodouche. Midnight Madman. Destroy him next time! (He broke up with Rach, he deserves it.)

Thank you, Mr. Blaineboat. I really like you.

Kurt xoxoxoxoxoxoxoxo

Blaine reads the email three times before deciding that he should wait until after class to type out a response. In the state he’s in right now, he’ll probably do something stupid and just write back, Yes to all.

He wants to, of course. He’d give Kurt an extension on his paper and say yes to a date with him in a heartbeat but… he knows he’ll have to convince Mme Tibideaux, sort out his personal TA-student dating policy (and maybe ask around if NYADA has an official take on it) and make sure Kurt really meant to type this and didn’t just do so in the spur of the painkiller-induced moment.

The class can’t end fast enough but as soon as it’s over and Blaine finds a quiet corner in the library to think of what to respond, he blanks, drafting several replies but ending up deleting all of them.

“Goddammit,” he mutters to himself. “Just write something.”

In the end, “something” doesn’t really compare to Shakespeare but Blaine figures that at least he won’t risk his job over it, either.

And maybe, just maybe, Kurt will catch the ambiguity in his words.

“What are you working on?” Rachel asks when she comes back to the loft, arms full of grocery bags that Kurt hopes are filled with veggies for him to make soup with. He seriously craves eating something that isn’t liquid but mushy veggies drowning in hot water really is the maximum of cheating when it comes to his pained cheeks. He knew it was a bad idea to get both upper wisdom teeth out the same day. But it’s too late to complain. At least he has a best friend who brings him soup.

Kurt sighs at the laptop in front of him.

“My paper for Mme Tibideaux,” he responds. “You know I love Sondheim but interpreting his work while physically injured makes me want to kill him.”

“He’s in his mid-eighties, Kurt,” Rachel tells him. “Let an old man be.”

“Ugh.” Kurt rubs his eyes. “The meds are making me tired, though.”

“Why do you even bother writing the paper when you got an extension from Mr. Dreamboat?”

Kurt frowns at Rachel. “Extension? When would I have gotten that?”

“In your email?” Rachel frowns back. “Come on, don’t tell me you chickened out just because you’re in love with him. He’s still our TA, he could probably do something about that deadline, so-”

“I don’t remember writing an email.” Kurt goes to student email and punches in his username and password. “Or getting one back, for that matter. Like, wouldn’t I rem-” He blinks in surprise, catching Blaine’s name in his inbox – twice, even. How high was he, exactly? “Wait, what did I…?” Clicking on the email, bits and pieces come back to him, and he suddenly grabs the couch cushion next to him, holding onto it for dear life. “Oh my god, no.”

“What?”

“Rachel.” Kurt feels the blood draining from his face. “Oh, Jesus, please tell me I didn’t write that…”

He scrolls through the quoted email below Blaine’s short responses (Dear Kurt, thank you for telling me! And yes, of course! I’ll talk to Mme Tibideaux, and get back to you once I know more. Get well soon! All the best, Blaine, and the more recent Dear Kurt, I got a yes from Mme Tibideaux, you’re getting one more week! Best, Blaine) and cringes when he reads the first line.

“I did. Fuuuuuck. Oh god, now I wish Sondheim could kill me.”

“Again, the guy’s, like, 85…” Rachel says slowly. “And why would you- whoa, is that your email to Blaine?”

Kurt doesn’t answer, instead opting to hide his face in his hands.

“You did not tell him we call him Mr. Dreamboat.”

Kurt whimpers.

“You did not ask him out!” Rachel squeals.

Kurt lets out a miserable whine.

“Oh my god, Kurt, you did not tell him you like him and signed the email with a dozen kissing faces!!!”

“WHAT?!” Kurt’s hands fly back to his laptop. He didn’t re-read that part. “Oh my god! I ju- Rachel, I can never go back to that school. I’m such a failure at life, Jesus Christ.”

“You’re very religious all of a sudden.”

“Don’t just sit there mocking me,” Kurt begs. “Tell me it was all just a bad dream.”

Rachel gives him a look of deep, genuine pity. “I really wish I could but I doubt my eyes can never unsee that email. Also, I know you wrote that while you were high on pain meds but I am a bit upset you never told me you didn’t like Brody. Might have saved me some trouble.”

Kurt rolls his eyes at her. “You honestly believe I never brought it up? What do you think we were we having that flea-market chair argument for? And don’t even pretend like you would have called it off with him just because I said something.” Rachel opens her mouth to speak but Kurt shakes his head violently. “It doesn’t matter, anyway – what am I going to do about this?!”

Rachel shrugs. “Kurt, it’s out there. All you can do now is roll with it.”

“In my grave, you mean?”

“In class. To which we’re going tomorrow since you’re so much better already,” Rachel tells him sternly. “Judging by Mr. Dreamb-”

“We can’t call him that anymore,” Kurt says quickly.

“Fine.” She sighs. “Judging by Blaine’s reply, he’s not bothered by it. Who knows, maybe he’s flattered. Or happy about it. It’s not every day you get an email from a cute guy confessing he’s crushing on you.”

“Yeah, right,” Kurt mumbles into the sleeve of his sweater. “As if I stand a chance with him.”

“No time like the present to find out,” Rachel says with finality. “Now, I’m making you soup, and you’re going to put on some Sondheim so you can work on your paper with some fresh insights and maximum concentration.”

It’s a nice thought – but Kurt doesn’t get anything done that night.

Blaine carefully keeps his eyes on his notebook when Rachel and Kurt walk into his class.

He was expecting Kurt to come back today (and no, he did not google how long it takes for people to recover from wisdom teeth extraction – he just asked Sam, who had gotten it done right before moving to New York), and he might have put a little extra effort into looking good today. He never got a response from Kurt, so he figures the guy has either silently acknowledged the paper extension, avoided Blaine for a number of possible reasons or forgotten about the exchange entirely.

Whatever the motivation behind it, Blaine will not despair over it. He’s Kurt’s TA, and as such won’t try anything anyway. NYADA doesn’t seem to have any policy against TAs dating students but nevertheless, he doesn’t want to put either them in an awkward position.

Which doesn’t even take into account the fact that he still doesn’t know whether Kurt remembers asking him out, whether he actually meant it, or whether he intends to ask again.

He might want to wait until Blaine’s no longer his TA as well. That’s alright with Blaine. After all, there’s a month left to this semester, so he can wait. He totally can.

He looks up from his notebook with a smile.

“Hi everyone,” he greets the class. “How are you doing? So, the deadline for your papers is Friday so I hope you’ve all sent me your drafts in case you want me to read them.” He can’t help but let his eyes wander to where Kurt is sitting. “Unless there were any reasons to hand them in late.”

Kurt blinks really quickly at the sudden eye contact, and lets out a nervous laugh.

And Blaine realizes he really totally cannot wait a whole month to get answers to his questions.

Before he can stop himself, he adds, “Everyone with extensions on their papers, please come see me after class.”

Of course, that’s just Kurt, but the class won’t know. Okay, Rachel might know, seeing as she elbows Kurt so hard it almost sends him flying off his seat. Kurt almost doesn’t seem to notice it as he’s busy staring at Blaine with a bit of a twitch in his eye.

Blaine suppresses a groan. This isn’t the plan. What is he doing?

“Blaine, I am so sorry!” Kurt exclaims in misery when the rest of the students slip away after class is over.

He’s beyond glad that Blaine didn’t make him sing any of his pieces today because apart from already being nervous whenever Blaine does ask him to do that, today his anxiety probably would have been the final straw. He might have run off or broken out into tears in front of everyone.

Blaine looks at him with a small smile. “You’ve got nothing to apologize.”

“Uh, yes, I do,” Kurt says stubbornly. He’s beyond mortified; the least Blaine can do is let him apologize properly. “I really didn’t mean to-”

“Oh.” Blaine looks down on the pile of sheet music he was stacking. “Yeah, right. Uhm, seriously though, I know how bad pain killers can be, I don’t blame you for-”

“Oh thank god, you know it was the pain meds,” Kurt breathes out in relief. “I was afraid you’d think-”

“No worries,” Blaine cuts him off. “It’s alright if you didn’t mean any of it.”

Kurt hesitates for a second, and gulps as he takes in Blaine’s slightly shaky hand movement as he stuffs the sheet music into his messenger bag.

“If…?” he asks quietly.

“I mean that,” Blaine says, eyebrows furrowing slightly. “Sorry, that, of course.”

Kurt’s at a loss. He’s getting mixed signals, and just judging by the last bit of the exchange – if that was the only thing that had happened, his stupid email and the fact that Blaine is his freaking TA forgotten – he might even be encouraged to inquire further.

But he can’t just admit to meaning all of it, right?

He settles for the safer topic. “So you wanted to speak to me about my paper?” he asks.

“Uh, yes.” Blaine smiles, though he still looks distracted. “I just wanted to ask you whether you had any questions about the material since you couldn’t join us for the last two sessions.”

“I…” Kurt shakes his head. “No, I think I’ve got it covered. Rachel caught me up.”

“Alright. Well, if you have any questions, you can send me an email.”

“Or not,” Kurt says quickly. “I think I’m swearing off emails for a while.”

Blaine laughs, the sound warm and pleasant in Kurt’s ear.

“Right,” he says. “I know this is a bit awkward but… it could have been worse. You could have written that to Mme Tibideaux or Miss July.”

Kurt is so relieved that Blaine is able to joke about it that he replies with a mindless, “Yeah, except I wouldn’t have told them I liked them, so…”

Blaine gapes at him, and Kurt realizes a second to late what he’s implying yet again.

“Oh,” Blaine says. “I, uh-”

“I’ve got to go,” Kurt cuts in, ears burning. “Can I go?”

“Uh, uhm, well, yeah, of course,” Blaine stutters.

As Kurt turns around and gathers his stuff, he can hear Blaine mutter something to himself. Kurt’s almost out the door, when Blaine calls out, “Kurt?”

Kurt turns around gingerly. “Yeah?”

“I really didn’t mind.”

“Okay...”

“Like, really really.”

Kurt wants to scream, But what does that mean?! Instead, he takes a deep breath, collects his thoughts, and says, “Okay… see you in improv, I guess?”

Blaine nods quickly. “Yeah. Later, Kurt.”

“Later, Blaine.”

Blaine is early to improv class, even though it’s all the way across campus. But he didn’t stop for his usual coffee, grabbed a salad to-go instead of lunch with his friends from his dorm, and also maybe, possibly hurried to get to class because Kurt is usually early to everything.

Blaine is the first to arrive, though, so he grabs his usual seat and gets out his salad. He’s about to slice the egg when he hears Kurt’s voice from outside the classroom.

“Talk to you later, Rachel.”

“Okay. And, Kurt, remember to ask-”

“Bye now!”

As soon as Kurt’s through the door, his eyes land on Blaine and he freezes.

“Uh, hi,” he says. His cheeks are slightly red, probably from the cold weather outside. “You’re – uhm, early.”

“Yeah.” Blaine looks down briefly, willing himself to just go for it this time. “I wanted to talk to you.”

“Again?” Kurt bites his lip. “I thought-”

“Kurt, when I said yes in the email, I meant yes to both.”

“Both?” Kurt frowns. “I don’t-”

“Both questions. Or requests, I guess.”

Kurt’s eyes widen. “You mean…”

“Yeah, I mean,” Blaine says with as much conviction as possible. “At first, I didn’t want to say anything because, you know, TA and all, but… seeing you in class, knowing, or well, hoping that you meant it, and… I don’t know, I couldn’t wait those four weeks until the semester is over. So I asked you to stay after class but then that felt super shady, too, so… I don’t even really know what I’m doing right now.”

“Do you know what you’re saying, though?” Kurt asks breathlessly.

“Well…” Blaine can’t suppress a grin. “Unlike some people, I’m not on pain meds right now, so, yeah, I’m pretty sure I have full control over my words.”

Kurt glares at him but it’s mostly façade, especially considering he’s still looking like Christmas came a bit early this year, and Blaine… well, Blaine is floored at the thought of being the one to actually make him look like that.

“Well, apparently those pain meds at least made me confess something neither of us could admit to sober, so…”

“Hey, for the record,” Blaine says, getting up to stand in front of Kurt, “I fully intended to ask you out once the semester was over.”

Kurt’s eyes are locked on Blaine with sheer intensity, and Blaine isn’t proud to admit it makes his knees a bit weak.

“Really?” Kurt asks, clearly intrigued, then sighs. “So my email was completely unnecessary.”

“I wouldn’t say that,” Blaine says. “I got so many laughs out of it.”

“Oh god, shut up.”

“No, I mean, it – eggstension?” Blaine chuckles. “Wisdom teat? There were some good ones there.”

“What part of shut up-”

Waiting really isn’t Blaine’s strong suit, he realizes, as he leans in to kiss Kurt, four weeks too early to be completely professional, yet about half a year too late considering how long he’s had his eye on him.

Kurt’s protest is muffled against Blaine’s lips, and dies down completely once they press closer together to get better access. They part for air briefly, and Kurt whispers, “When I got up this morning, I would have sworn this would be the last thing I’d ever say, but I’m pretty proud of myself for writing that email now.”

Blaine licks his bottom lip, chasing the faint taste of Kurt there. “I’m glad you wrote it, too.” This whole thing between them has lasted about a minute but he wants more so badly he feels like he’s physically incapable from drawing Kurt back in and kissing him again.

They keep at it until other students start to trickle into the room, and even then they share meaningful glances and press their ankles together between their chairs.

Between all the talking and kissing, Blaine didn’t get to eat his salad, so about halfway through the lecture, his stomach starts growling.

Kurt turns to him with a grin. “Forgot to eat?”

“I guess I was distracted.”

“Hm, by what, I wonder?” Kurt asks cheekily.

Blaine eyes his untouched salad in amusement. “I guess I got pretty egg-sited over this boy I like.”

It’s totally worth all the frustrated elbowing he gets in response.

#a-simple-rainbow #klaine fic #klaine #klaine fanfic #klaine AU #klaine prompt #my klaine fics #THIS IS SO SILLY YET AGAIN #I'M SORRY RAINBOW I APPARENTLY CAN'T WRITE NON-SILLY ANYMORE #but shhh Blaine really loves puns - pass it on #(there might be typos too - they're all unintentional unless they are part of Kurt's email :P)

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itcowcer · 7 years

Text

Subject: Pumpkin Patch

Paul Holland [email protected] 2:05 AM (6 hours ago) to Mark

Heeeeey Mark!

So I know it's been a while, and I wanted to give you a quick heads-up on what’s going on and why I haven’t sent any drafts in recent history. Let's be real, it’s been months. But I want you to know that I haven't just been laying around over here, and that I do have something planned to give to you. It's just not ready yet. Sorry :( Now I'm not trying to tease you; I've hit a wall. What I do have is a bunch of source materials which (I hope) will prove to you that I'm building something, potentially pretty big, for my next novel. That's Right!!!! I've been researching Mark!!!! Who would've thought I knew how. Anyways, I thought this might tide you over until the rough draft or, at the most, spur you to send some seed money..... ;) You will find the sources in the subsequent attachments to this email. I think they kind of speak for themselves, but if you need me to elaborate on what I'm thinking just shoot me a message and I will give you deets.

Pleasure as always [?]

Paul

Paul Holland [email protected] 2:56 AM (5 hours ago) to Mark

Whoops! I forgot to attach the sources in that last message. Oh well, I will take better care to attach them this time. I figure I should go ahead and let you know what's going through my head right now, just so we are on the same page. First off, all of this is real. All of this stuff has apparently occurred or is currently occurring, and I've been able to pick up more bits and pieces the longer I've stayed in town (hence the long turn around). Where am I? I don't particularly want to tell you. For that reason I've redacted some information which might clue you into my whereabouts. I'm sure with a certain amount of cyber- sleuthing you'd be able to pinpoint my location, as some of the major points I just cannot change. However by that point I figure it will be too much work for you anyways. DO NOT COME AFTER ME! This story is too good for me to pass up on. I'm only messaging you as a courtesy, and to let you know that I haven't forgotten the money I owe you. I will hopefully be able to pay you back with this novel's completion.

Now onto content. I found this story, of all places, in the newspaper. Yeah it was this grotesque murder which had all of the city community in a hubbub. It was strange too, like ritualistic and such. I've included the short blurb I found in the newspaper, it should be the 3rd attachment. Of course I saved it. I wasn't sure where to go next with my writing and everyone loves true crime or at least a good murder mystery. Then, in the next week, I saw a couple other odd articles (I have attached them as well). One is a letter of resignation from one of the news paper's journalists, due to some kind of journalist ethical concern. Apparently he hasn’t been heard of since. Like completely disappeared. For some reason I was sure that the initial murder, and the later disappearance were related, though I couldn't figure how.

This forced me to dig a little further and I think what I found is captivating at least. Even if I'm grasping at straws I think it tells a compelling narrative, and might sell. I found a small interview, written by the Journalist that disappeared, in regards to a cultural movement within the city. As it turns out this place has a long history of creepy shit, like underground slave prisons, civil war ghosts, a history of catastrophic fires, train accidents, macabre poets, dilapidated asylums turned apartment complexes, and even a vampire legend. No kidding! The guy is entombed down at this old cemetery that overlooks the river. Well the interview is with a member of this group of artists, all of whom were trying to keep this inherent creepiness a part of the city's culture. Though she went by a code name, as all members of Pumpkin Patch do to remain anonymous (in this case kittykat666(=^.^=). I believed that she was the victim in the murder. Having contacted the victim’s parents, I asked if they knew anything about the group Pumpkin Patch. Only the mother would respond, with an invitation to meet with her. Though the meeting was brief, she gave me a series of her daughter's journal entries, a forwarded set of emails between her and her daughter on the topic, and permission to use these things in publishing my next book, so long as I didn't use her daughter's name.

The first attachment is the newspaper interview with kittykat666(=^.^=) It describes really well what the group is about, and how it operates, and it shows you where I'm leaning for main characters (the girl and the journalist). I think it introduces everything well. The second is the girl's journal entries (at least the ones I've deemed relevant). All of these pertain to Pumpkin Patch and they really get you to see who this poor girl was and how she got sucked into this whole mess. The next attachment is the first article blurb I found, the one that describes the murder. The fourth attachment is the letter of resignation from the journalist who interviewed “Kat”. I figure I will just forward those emails that the mother sent to me. There aren't many of them, however there is some character building stuff there. You can see the loving family “Kat” and her mother had before. They also show how the two found Pumpkin Patch. Sorry in advance, the mother has no clue of grammar. I have also included one last attachment, which is unnerving and chilling when you understand how the group finds its inspiration. It's a series of screen shots I took from the group’s auction site. Here, they post a bunch of their work for buyers. They had just posted a new auction when I checked out the site page. Pay attention to the groups shared theme in the artwork.

Whew! That was a lot for an email! Let me know what you think! Paul

Paul Holland [email protected] 2:59 AM (5 hours ago) to Mark

-_____-

Paul

Attachment 1, Attachment 2, Attachment 3, Attachment 4, Attachment 5

Paul Holland [email protected] 3:08 AM (5 hours ago) to Mark

Weird. Someone just rang the door bell to my apartment. I went to go check and no one was there. I'm a little unnerved, especially given what I've just sent you (that subject matter which is still fresh in my mind). I'm not entirely sure it's nothing, but realistically it’s probably nothing so I'm going to get these emails to you and then cool off. Here you go,

Paul

forwarded message

From: [************] To: [email protected] Cc: Sent: [, * *** **** ::**] Subject: opportunities ;)

Hey Kit Kat i hope everything is going better. i know that finding friends can be rough in college but im sure there are a ton of great clubs over there. Just get off your little butt and look!!!! :p only teasing. Also your father should be put that money back into ur college fund. Evidently he needed to buy his new gal pal a car lol. The man's no good! Either way i will make sure everything is all set, u just worry about school work and meeting people and HAVING FUN!!! Let me know if you need anything, im just a phone call away!!!

Love, Mom

. . .

Resp:opportunities ;)

Thanks Mom. Everything is fine, I was just a little worried because the tuition bill is overdue and it needs to be paid in order for me to sign up for classes next semester. He's buying her a CAR!!!!! SMH! SMDH! But my classes are going well. I actually turned in my first couple of paintings and the professor really liked them. He told me I thought out of the box, already had a unique style, and that I should keep pushing myself. He said that I might run into trouble when we start doing other forms, but that he'd help me if I need it. I thought that the class wouldn't like my work or be weirded out, but all in all I got good responses and helpful critiques. Some people in my class invited me to hangout, idk I might go.

. . .

Resp:resp:opportunities ;)

Oh kitty thats great! im glad your classes are going well. And you should SPEND TIME WITH THOSE CLASSMATES!!! Jeeesh!!! Also i am not sure what SMH stands for. i tried to think but cant. :( i did some looking because i knew u wouldnt and i found a club that you might enjoy. They are artists in the area who have auction events, have group meetings and they seem to do a lot in the area. it might be the kind of thing to set u on an art career, if thats what u want to do. i just happened to hear about them and i looked up their site. A lot of their work looks right up ur alley! There is a submission section on their page, and maybe u can send in some of you drawings? i was surprised by how much they were selling for, and i think a lot of ur work is better. I will send you the link. There called the Pumpkin Patch. Thats kinda cute!

Love ya! Mom

. . .

Resp:resp:resp:opportunities ;)

Yeah I'll look it up and send something in. I'll also try hanging out with my class, I'm not sure what we will be doing. Thank you for everything. Love you Too! P.s. SMH is Shaking My Head.

forwarded message

From: [************] To: [email protected] Cc: Sent: [, * *** **** ::**] Subject: Pumpkin Patch

Remember that group you were talking about? Pumpkin Patch. I submitted one of my works and it got accepted. I think you'd remember the one, it had that spider made out of sewing needles and thimbles, strung up in a wire web, the one that I got an award for in school. The group admin sent me an email and wanted to know why I wanted to join the group so I kinda bullshitted an answer and I guess they liked it. I'm supposed to go to a meeting with them, however I have to wear a mask and create an artist name which is kind of weird. I guess they want all the artists to be anonymous even to each other. I told them that that made me uncomfortable, but they assured me that the meeting will be on campus. I'm going to see what it is and drop it if its too sketch. I guess most meetings are online, but bimonthly meetings are in person.

. . .

Resp:Pumpkin Patch

Kit Kat. Idk this sounds a little scary. i wish i had known all that before i sent you the link. Be careful there are a lot of weirdos out there and i dont want u to get hurt. u are a grown women and i hope you will use you best discretion. There is always your classmates, and maybe starting a group with them would be better for you. How did that go with them? I expect you to call me soon.

Be safe, Mom

. . .

Resp:resp:Pumpkin Patch

Please don't freak out but I ended up going to that meeting. It was cool though. We kind of just sat around, discussing what the next theme will be, what scary movies we like that kind of thing. We also planned a little get together at a museum. There are a couple other girls there so I think it's fine. I kind of know one of the people in the group too, although I'm not supposed to. He was actually one of the guys I hung out with last week. He's not in my art class but he is a year above us so everyone knows him. He sort of let it slip that he was in the Pumpkin Patch when we were all hanging out. He assured me that it wasn't going to be weird and that the mask thing was more like a gimmick than anything else, to make the group interesting. That night with my class was fun too, we just sat around a fire pit talking, eating hot dogs, sharing stories. Somebody had a guitar and they all started singing these old songs. They are a good group. I'm going to spend time with them again.

. . .

Resp:resp:resp:Pumpkin Patch

Well im glad that you had a good time. Just remember to be careful, and that u dont have to do anything u dont want to, and CALL YOUR MOTHER. Also im glad you met some nice people. Is there anyone I should be meeting anytime soon? ;)

Please call, I worry Mom

forwarded message

From: [************] To: [email protected] Cc: Sent: [, * *** **** ::**] Subject: What's Up!!!

Hello Kathryn? Im not sure if you remember me, however im YOUR MOTHER! What's been going on? u haven't called me in a while. I hope you've started thinking about housing for next year. Dont worry about the price its all being paid for by ur father. Also I see that you have another exhibition thingy coming up with your Pumpkin Patch. Im thinking about coming down and rooting u on, seeing as u failed to mention the last one. What do you think?

. . .

Resp:What's Up!!!

Yeah I've been looking at some places. Some friends and I are thinking about getting an apartment together a little off campus. I will let you know what we find. Also that first exhibition wasn't a big thing, and I didn't think you'd want to miss work for it. This next one's not a big deal either and I'm not even going to be there, we aren't supposed to associate with or present our work in order to retain the whole aura of mystery. We can still check it out if you want, we just can't let anyone know that I'm a collaborating artist. Also I can't tell you which work is mine, sorry. :/ We can go to this nice little french restaurant after. I just went there recently with a close friend of mine, it just might be my favorite place in town now :3. Let me know when you're in the area.

forwarded message

From: [************] To: [email protected] Cc: Sent: [, * *** **** ::**] Subject: New Exhibition

Hey Mom, I know that there is another exhibition coming up, however I'd prefer that you didn't come to this one. I had fun last time, it's just that I don't think I'd be comfortable with you being there. Also I've decide to leave the group. I just didn't like where it was going and it didn't feel the same as when we first started. That's part of the reason why this latest exhibition would be no good. Also things are falling through at the apartment so I'm trying to find another one for the rest of the semester. I'll send you the places I've found. So far the rent will only be slightly more expensive. Also my roommates already have someone lined up to sublet so we don't have to worry about paying for two places. I will call you soon, and I love you.

Kat

Mark Gergich [email protected] 7:13 AM (1 hour ago) to Paul

Paul,

I just read through everything you’ve emailed me. The forwards, the attachments... everything. Paul Pick up the phone, let me know where you are, I am concerned. I think you may have stumbled onto something that needs to be taken care of by the police. Please Paul. Do not write this book. Don't worry about debts you think you owe me, I'm not worried about that I just want you to come out of this safely without a target on your back. You need to STOP writing this book.

Your friend and publisher, Mark

Paul Holland [email protected] 8:06 AM (3 Minutes ago) to Mark

Mark,

He says I can’t.

Paul

#pumpkinpatch #PP #itcowcer #writing

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