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fourswordsannotated · 6 months

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akira himekawa are unbelievably cool.

soooo here's the thing. i was looking at akira himekawa's website on a whim and found a public blog, with posts that go all the way back to 2009. many hours of google translating later, and i've developed an even stronger admiration of these two women and their exceptional career as manga artists. they share so much in these posts about the creative process, their thoughts on social justice, their connections with nature, and their most major original story, gliding reki, which seems to have always been a passion project in the midst of commercial work.

from what i could gather, reki is unique in that they were determined to do it in full color. and they did it, because after reading about their career, it's clear to me that when these women set their mind to an idea, they make it happen. see also: they just recently produced and distributed their own art book, because no publishers were offering to do it in a way that pleased them.

their stated goals for reki were to make something more adult than their previous children's manga, taking place in a city, involving a lot of mechanical art, and featuring stronger romantic and self-described erotic subtext. good for them. before i get into the four swords-related stuff, i'm sharing what i could find on the internet about reki.

more under the cut, because there's quite a bit to discuss :)

not much that i could find on the blog specifically references four swords, but they have many fascinating insights about nintendo, the zelda fandom, and the franchise as a whole. i can't know for certain because this information was surmised from translated text, but it seems as if their manga with chibi link made them feel a little stifled, which is why they took a long break before returning to do twilight princess. it's not lost on me that even a work like four swords, which they may regard as not their favorite or best, still has inspired and brought together so many passionate, creative, and diverse people. this is especially sweet because it seems as if they met each other, and formed their creative partnership, because of a shared fandom interest of their own.

honda and nagano have shared their thoughts and feelings on this blog for more than a decade, and they have a lot of thoughts and feelings. throughout their entire career they've made commentary on work-life balance, their experiences as women in a male-dominated field, and their desire to create original art while simultaneously enjoying some commercial work as well. they are passionate about social justice, particularly re: women and indigenous people, and offer insights on aspects of culture and history and the state of the world that really could resonate with anyone. and they really seem to appreciate fans of their work, and emphasize repeatedly the care and thought they put into their manga in the hopes it will inspire and bring catharsis to readers. they love animals (especially wolves), being outside in nature, being nerds about art they enjoy, a certain subgenre of romantic manga that appealed to and empowered female readers in the 90's and 2000's, and traveling around the world to partake in activities like horse riding and falconry.

the coolest part is, they're still updating the blog to this day :) in fact they seem to have recently returned to it, reflecting that twitter is not their preferred manner of sharing things online. they seem very familiar with and fond of older-school blogging culture.

there's a lot more i could say here about my findings, some of which do pertain to... certain ships 💜🖤 . but i don't want my genuine appreciation for these authors to be overshadowed by that kind of conversation. in addition to a link to the blog itself, i'm including a few translated posts of interests, which you can interpret and incorporate into your perception of the media however you please. at the end of the day, it's a really cool gift that these artists have chosen to share so much over such a long period of time. by making their personalities, beliefs, and insights more visible to fans of their work, i hope it brings new context to the stories we already love.

a modern-day insight:

re: the zelda mangas. these are from several points throughout their career. please note that they have so many fond things to say about zelda as a franchise and their work on the mangas, especially regarding the way they've affected fans. i encourage you to look for yourself, on their blog and their other socials!

re: gliding reki

re: the creative process (and in the latter two, the fandom that seems to have inspired them!)

re: their two goofyass adorable tiny dogs that they dress up in outfits while also loving wolves like a lot, they love wolves (both domesticated and wild), they really love wolves

re: wolf day (every day is wolf day,)

re: indigenous rights

re: painting serious works on commission vs their manga. i can't know for sure exactly what it means, but it really does kinda hit

re: a fan and manga artist in training bringing them art and a note

and a moment from a twilight princess manga interview i found very sweet :)

okay. you've made it to the end. i know you're wondering. here you go. please remember that this is and always has been a public blog, and these posts are actually from 2009 and 2010. also please remember that the point of this post is not to cause or fuel fandom discourse, but to appreciate these authors and the things that they choose to express.

(also, this is the column they were referring to in image 1. it's FASCINATING. give it a read if you'd like!)

the dots are there. you're welcome to connect them.

thank you for your beautiful work and insights, honda and nagano. please never change.

#akira himekawa #four swords manga #legend of zelda #four swords #loz #twilight princess manga #(yes there is v/dow stuff at the very bottom okay it's there just please read the rest)

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sisterdivinium · 5 months

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You know, for a show with so many female characters that so many of us love given how they all get time in the spotlight one way or another and they fill that time up rather wonderfully since they are deeper and more developed than what we're used to seeing in general media, it is peculiar (to say the least) to see so few "alternative" ships to the main one.

I'm not saying the canon ship doesn't deserve its attention -- I'm wondering instead why the canon ship and it alone seem to guide the WN fans who just so happen to enjoy writing/reading fic or fanart or whatever.

You'd think all these cool women would inspire more ships or combinations thereof, but those of us who aren't invested in avatrice just... Float along, around one another, ignored (and, yes, mostly undisturbed too; being unpopular does have its advantages and that includes a lot less weirdos leaving you strange or awkward messages -- it does not, however, shield us from people flooding our goddamn tags on AO3 with fic that has nothing to do with our little ships and I do wish such negligence of the pairing itself meant we didn't have to deal with this spam...)

I am also not saying that fandom activity should be based solely on shipping (and recently someone on Reddit was rather confused by the fact that a lot of it is, which is quite an interesting topic to discuss in itself -- after all, there is more to fan creativity than shippy fic... Or there used to be), merely that, here, it appears that a canon relationship can outshine interest in the other, non-canon ones. It's already there and it was doubtless well-done by the show, so it's natural that it should claim people's attention, sure. It's just that being canon was never the parameter for whether people were interested in these or those two (or more) characters maybe being involved and trying to explore what that could mean through fanwork.

There has always been a complaint haunting fandom spaces concerning the minuscule amounts of f/f fic, art, discussion, w/e based on how few (interesting or sympathetic or relatable) female characters there are in media at large. So what I'm curious about is why fan creations made around WN -- a show that finally gives us a whole cast of female characters that are what we have been craving for decades -- don't also reflect its diversity.

There are alternative ships (I'm here, all happy in my tiny Doctor Superion bubble, and I know there are Camila/Lilith, Ava/Lilith, Mary/Shannon, Mary/Lilith shippers out there, so a warm hello to you if you're reading this), but go on AO3 and compare the numbers of things tagged with these proper pairings to the grand total of WN stories. Better (or worse) still, do so with the "otp: true" trick or simply by excluding avatrice from the search to see how many are left.

It's... A considerable difference. And a mystery, at least to me.

#tagging this as #warrior nun #simply because i'd like to talk about this and maybe some of you have thoughts or theories about it #i just ask you engage in good faith if you do. i'm not pointing fingers at avatrice people i think they're fine and dandy #i'm just -- to reiterate -- surprised at how little interest there is in other ships when the potential is all there #(is it because they're nuns? that never stopped avatrice so why should it stop others...)#(besides lilith is hardly still a nun after s2. bea left. mary didn't really take vows did she? you really thought i was a nun she says...)#meta fandom talk i guess #then again about the nun thing... i have noticed a lot of people just go for aus. i can't recall ever being in a fandom with SO many aus #is the religious aspect an issue by any chance? i also recall someone commenting on how little a part religion played in these aus #curious. very curious.#i imagine some of you are wondering why i care when i don't even read fic but --#-- to quote jillian salvius herself i am a curious person and well you are a curiosity lol

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jaehunnyy · 11 months

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A touch of Heaven

Genre: strangers-to-lovers!au, right person, wrong time trope, a bit of angst, fluff, crack maybe?

Word count: 2k

Pairing: Yunho x reader (feat. the rest of Ateez, San x Y/n's best friend)

Warnings: parties, drinking, getting married in Vegas for fun (and as a joke), time-skip, a kiss, one pet name, possible grammar mistakes

Taglist: @shakalakaboomboo, @ssaboala, @bluisheye93

Networks: @cromernet 🤍

Beginning of college, 2019

Having all of your friends chant the same name every time you met to decide where to celebrate the beginning of another chapter of your lives was starting to give you a bit of a headache. Vegas here, Vegas there. It wasn't that the city didn't appeal to you; heck, you were as excited as them, but you were also scared—so many things could happen in one week, and you weren't usually the luckiest one when it came to stuff like this. You could even imagine yourself drunkenly marrying someone you hopefully won't ever see again, and though what happens in Vegas is supposed to stay in Vegas, that would remain tattooed on your heart as well. And despite your friends acknowledging your hesitation and saying that you should decide where to go, for the first time in a while, you agreed to go with the flow and see what was waiting for you there.

Said and done. Your little vacation in Vegas has started better than you would have expected; the first days were pretty chill, the rainy weather making you stay indoors more than not, which you enjoyed; you weren't quite a big fan of parties, so that was more than perfect for you, despite wanting to visit and see more of what the city had to offer.

The next few days though, were going to be the interesting ones. The beach was full of decorations for the upcoming party, the shy shadow of a moon settling itself on the sky. The sand was hugged by the blue waves of the sea, while your friends started to make conversations with the other late teenagers, wanting to have some fun. The atmosphere seemed to have a different effect on you, though—you find it quite suitable for you to reflect over your future, the comforting noise of the beach cleaning your mind; or at least intending to do so, unless you heard your name from your friend's loud voice.

"C'mon, Y/n, you can't stay here all night and do nothing. We came here to have fun…" Wooyoung said, a bit of anxiety in his voice as he feared you didn't feel good with their choice of coming here. "Is there something off?"

You smiled at him, making him relax a bit, though he wasn't entirely convinced that you were feeling it. "I'm fine, Woo. I was just thinking…"

You heard another voice coming from behind you, your other friend's arms patting your back softly.

"Y/n, the future is something you can worry about after this trip. You worked hard to get where you are now, so consider this your reward. Furthermore, I'm getting married tonight!"

Despite laughing at how determined she was to make her dream come true, her advice might have actually helped you a bit—so, on an impulse, you grabbed Wooyoung's hand and got up, grabbing a can of beer for yourself and going to the big crowd of people.

Later on, you forgot about whatever happened before you joined them. Everyone's jokes were getting the loudest laughter out of you, your tipsy nature showing already. More chaos was summoned the moment your friend chose to fake a marriage with a dimpled-smile boy for fun, getting you responsible for the rings, which you gladly accepted. And that's when plans changed for you—when, guided by your excitement, you ran into a tall man, his eyes shooting you a worried look immediately.

"Are you okay?" he asked, hand on your back to give you some support so you wouldn't fall.

The stars in his eyes made something sparkle inside of you as well, and knowing yourself and how you attach to people, this was what you feared the most before coming here.

"I'm fine…" you whispered, looking away from him as soon as you noticed him looking back.

"May I ask why you were in such a hurry?" he chuckled, moving his hand away from your back since he was scared that it would make you uncomfortable.

"My friends are getting married and I need to buy the ringssss!" you squealed, pointing your finger to the happy couple.

"San is marrying your friend?"

"The dimple guy is your friend?"

You two laughed together, an echo of innocent chuckles around you as you discovered a thing you two had in common.

"Let's go together, then." he smiled and offered you his hand to hold, which you gladly accepted.

On your way to finding whatever would serve as two rings, you found out that his name was Yunho and he was the chill type as well, resembling you. They were there to celebrate San's birthday, so he was all around the place, hoping time would pass just a little faster. His other friend, Mingi, was a party lover since they knew him, and something about his attitude made Yeosang love them too after a few glasses of alcohol. Jongho was usually chill, but he let go of his personality for the sake of the birthday boy. You told him that your friends were similar as well, Wooyoung being the type to go clubbing and convince Seonghwa and Hongjoong to follow him (mostly because he was a menace), while your common friend loved getting herself some new friends.

"Do you want to go take a walk after they are done?" he smiled, convincing you almost immediately.

"I would love to." you said, returning his gesture.

Two hours later, the wedding was "officiated" by his friend, Mingi, who seemed to have a lot of fun while playing that role, with some of the drinks packaging serving as the papers the married couple had signed. You and Yunho went for the walk he promised, admiring the stars cladded sky while finding new stuff about each other.

"Do you think they will regret anything in the morning?" you asked, gaining a soft grin from him.

"Even if they do, it's nothing official anyway. We would probably make fun of Mingi for the rest of our lives though." he said, before entering another mantra of silent thoughts: "When are you leaving?"

"In two days, what about you?"

"Three. I still have a bit of a long ride, but at least I have someone similar now."

You honestly thought that time flew faster than it should have with Yunho by your side. You were supposed to have fun with your 5 friends, yet, you found yourself screaming old songs' lyrics while Yunho was driving around the city, turning the chilly ride into a Carpool Karaoke wannabe. You even got yourselves matchy bracelets, something about your bond making you feel like you have known each other for years. You took pictures together, tested the diners around the hotel you stayed in, swam together, all under the nosy looks of your friends (who bonded immediately as well, especially because Wooyoung and San seemed to become best friends and your friend didn't stop calling San her husband).

And as much as you wished for these two days to last forever, these beautiful moments end faster than we expect. For the last time, you were out with Yunho, the cold water touching your legs as you shared your impressions on this holiday, in the last 5 minutes you had together. His head was on your lap while you played with his blonde hair, listening to him saying he was gonna miss this, miss you.

"You know… I've had an idea…"

You looked at him with doe eyes, showing him that he had all of your attention.

"Do you think we are meant to be? I mean, we still have to pursue our careers, we live in different states…"

It was way too early to think about what future was planned for you and Yunho, if there was even a future for the two of you. You did feel like you two were completing each other, but the time you spent together wasn't helping you, nor the conditions you'd be in as soon as you return to your usual life.

"You might be the right person, but our time was too short to even figure it out, Yunho." you looked away from him, avoiding his saddened gaze.

"What if we meet again in 4 years?" he innocently asked, getting up from your lap so he could properly face you. "Same place, same date, but in 4 years. That would be enough for us to figure out what we want to do with our lives, to see what would happen."

You frowned a bit at his offer, there was no way he was serious, was he?

"That's insane, Yunho. What if we will find someone else in those years?"

"Well then, this would mean the inevitable—we weren't meant to be."

You didn't have the nerve, nor the time to think about this too much. You were sure that things would settle differently until then, but you chose to go with the flow once again.

"Let's do that, Yunho. May we meet again." you smiled and kissed his cheek, going to your friends who were already waiting for you.

"May we meet again…" he said, touching his cheek in the spot you kissed it before.

End of college, 2023

"I still cannot believe you two did it like the oldies. What are you? Millennials? You had all the possibilities to talk, yet you chose to not even get his number!"

"Woo, stop—"

"Even when San offered to give me Yunho's number, you refused it!"

A laugh took over your face as you looked at Wooyoung, not believing he was really scolding you right then for what you and Yunho decided. Yet, there you were, the taxi almost passing the speed limit as you were pleading him to take you faster to the beach where it all started.

Yunho was nervously walking back and forth on the sand, with San following his every move.

"Can you stop already…? You're making me dizzy." the younger said, watching as his friend was walking further from him.

"Yunho, listen to me! I know it's past the time, but… give it another shot, it doesn't have to be perfect to turn into something beautiful!"

Yunho looked at him, a soft smile creeping on his face.

"I guess I should trust you… you seem to have your way with words."

San smirked at that, a little dimple appearing on his cheek as he went and hugged his friend. And right when he opened his eyes, he saw two pretty familiar figures running towards them, his face lightning immediately in joy.

"WOOYOUNG!" he screamed, pushing Yunho and going to the other boy, hugging him tight.

Yunho turned to his direction, noticing the joyful reunion of the best friends, and lastly, but who he expected the most, you.

You took in his features, his dark hair making him look even better than when you last saw him.

"You came."

You both said at the same time, giggling shortly after you noticed that your chemistry was still there.

"Would have been here earlier, but the traffic was insane."

His hands grabbed your waist softly, his deep gaze scanning your beautiful features.

"I guess we were… meant to be, or whatever?" you asked, hands around his neck.

"Someone got a bit bold." he smirked, getting closer to your face.

"Well, I seem to be stuck with you, so I gotta charm you somehow."

In a blink of an eye, your lips pressed together, melting into a sweet kiss, full of longing, but also relief—the relief that things worked for you.

"Love birdies, we're still on a beach, public space, you know?" San said cockily, giving Wooyoung a high-five.

"Said the one who almost crushed his long lost friend."

"That's a story for another day!" Wooyoung defended himself.

"That's right, because the main story is about me and my future lover today." Yunho smiled, hugging you close to his chest once again.

"Come, love, we have a lot to catch up on." you dragged him after you, leaving Woo and San flabbergasted behind.

Maybe destiny has its way of working, and those ways are different for every couple. For you and Yunho, it proved that the distance couldn't extinguish the flame between the two of you, the touch of heaven making you grow more found of each other, waiting for the next plans the future had with you.

#ateez fanfic #ateez ff #ateez yunho #kpop oneshots #kpop ff #ateez oneshot #ateez x reader #yunho x reader #yunho x y/n #ateez fluff #ateez angst #yunho fluff #yunho angst #yunho fanfic #kpop fluff #kpop angst #jeong yunho ateez #chip writes ✨️

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sai-lec · 8 days

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The Internet Tifosi

an informal reflection of online fan spaces by me, a recent member of the tifosi.

I love being part of the tifosi. I love the colour red. I love seeing the passion of the tifosi at races. I love Charles. I love Carlos. I love watching races and highlights from old team lineups I love the greats like Schumacher and Lauda and Prost I love Ferrari.

My path in f1 didnt start with Ferrari, it started with McLaren- my dad is a huge McLaren fan, he introduced me to Lando (and Carlos but primarily Lando) in lockdown and sure it didnt click with me right away; I watched some races with him, he showed me the highlights from the races I didnt watch with him (including several videos of Grosjean's infamous crash) and despite the fact that I wasn't heavily invested it gave us something to bond over. That September when I left home for university it gave us a reason to call each other. When I developed a genuine interest (after I decided I wasn't coming back home after I graduate university) my dad wasn't bothered by the fact that I had shown up at Christmas with a Ferrari hat on, in fact he took it off my head and tried it on himself; "do I look good as a Sainz fan?". From my dad introducing me to Lando, Carlos was the natural next step in immersing myself into the fan community. From Carlos, we found Charles and the Tifosi. I don't have many (or any) friends in real life with the same level of interest in Formula 1 that I have developed, naturally I found myself creating this blog hoping to find a community within online spaces that wasn't available to me in the digital world.

My experience within the tifosi has been... unique, to say the least. I have been engaged in online fan spaces since I was around 14- I made my Tumblr account in 2016 to talk about supernatural, before moving on to buzzed unsolved, and marvel and so on as my interests developed and changed. Within each of these communities I have found a group of people that I felt comfortable around enough to call them genuine friends. some of whom I still keep in contact with despite the fact that our interests have changed. that hasn't quite happened to the same extent with the internet's Tifosi; and there is a multitude of reasons why.

The 'Versus' Predicament

To be rather blunt for a moment- I have never been part of a community that has been filled with so much vitriol for other members, and I was part of the Marvel fandom when Civil War was released (team cap). In fact, it seem that the tifosi are constantly engaged in a Civil War of their own- devoted fans of Charles as the self-labelled Lecfosi and Team55 practically always appear to be at odds with each other. And publicly so.

It is natural for people to have a favourite driver- we've just discussed how ive come to find myself as a devotee to Team55. But as with other areas, fan spaces have seen negative impact in communication due to internet dependancy in recent years.

From my perspective, the issue appears to be a mixture of cancel culture and virtue signalling. Now cancel culture is in itself a manifestation of virtue signalling in which creators or whomever else face mass criticism and attempted deplatforming as the internet becomes aware of potentially problematic past or present behaviour; however given its internet context and usage I've elected to view it as a separate entity.

Internet fan spaces have regressed to a state of defensiveness- in order to promote and validate your approval of one subject you must justify why in comparison to another. This is where the effects of cancel culture come into play. Cancel culture reached its peak performativity during quarantine as the internet and social media became the primary method of protesting and spreading awareness of activism whilst maintaining social distancing and quarantining requirements. As morality became monitored and policed by a younger and younger average user base, it is natural that there was a bastardisation of the phenomenon resultant in the mass cancelling and calling out of any person who spoke or acted in a manner that wasn't deemed correct; not necessarily related to politics or activism at this point, I myself received an influx of mass hatred and cancellations to the point where I was borderline shunned by an entire gaming community for making a joke about everyone hating one of the event mini games ('whats everyones favourite game and why is it not buildmart').

This same mindset is so visibly present within the Tifosi today- both extremes find themselves comparing one driver to the other in order to justify their favour. For example, tensions have been high with Lecfosi and Team55 almost in a panicked state looking to justify why they chose to support their favourite driver with 'Carlos is gifted every achievement Charles would have beaten him if he wasn't held back ' and 'Ferrari fired the wrong driver' filling the comments of Ferrari's Instagram and Twitter posts. This has prompted fans to flock to defend their preferred driver, often in ways which contribute to the animosity. Drivers face this pseudo-cancellation as a result with twitter bios seeing additions of 'Carlos fans din' 'if you like CL16 unfollow me' after every race. Criticisms of the drivers themselves increase, they are placed under heavier scrutiny as the violence between fans increases leading to a never-ending circle of driver-to-fan hatred. it is seen as almost a moral failure within fan spaces to support the wrong driver.

I, personally, have witnessed arguments between fans in comment sections on tiktok- the most memorable being a 'share your favourite driver and why' tiktok in which a Carlos fan received comments of 'Well you know Charles is actually better because x y z'. (I'd like to point out this is not an antagonisation of Charles fans, but this is what actually happened nor am I excusing Team55 from the ability to make similar comment). The notable point here is that Charles was never mentioned, yet the mere fact of someone else preferring the wrong driver in this commenter's eyes lead to them purposefully targeting another Ferrai fan to chastise them on their decision effectively boiling the interaction down to 'you're not allowed to support this driver because I don't like him'.

This is where virtue signalling comes into play. For those unaware, virtue signalling is the public expression of opinion with the intent of alignment with a moral correctness. The internet especially in fanbases weaponises that frequently through the examples of 'dni of you support x' as discussed prior. The followup to that mindset is the feeling of requirement to discuss. For example, when a driver races poorly or is subjected to penalty, fan spaces will see an influx of posts demanding fans to defend their driver (How can you support him when he drives like that), mass criticising the driver (he doesn't deserve his seat why isn't he fired), or public statement of disapproval because of the social requirement to misalign yourself with the incorrect actions of another person without genuine belief behind the statement as oftentimes excuses will be made for their preferred person in a similar situation. At times it appears that the primary interaction of some people within the Tifosi is to engage in critical commentary on their disliked drivers.

Criticism? Or extreme negativity?

With call out and cancel culture leaving the political sphere it has severely impacted the positivity of fanbases as criticism becomes a primary, almost necessary, aspect of fan culture. Of course we talk about critical consumption in which you are able to analyse and evaluate the content which we consume and become aware of its biases and flaws, however this has snowballed to become criticise everything you consume. Thus, the animosity of the fan spaces rises once more.

Of course every driver is bound to face warranted criticism- the majority of the grid are socially unaware rich white men, they are destined to say or do something worth criticising. They are bound to say bitchy things and act in ways that you don't agree with because that is just the nature of humanity, everyone does these things. But that does not mean every single one of their actions are worth dissecting under the microscope. And the prevalent attitude of analysing drivers mannerisms, behaviours emotions and heat-of-the-moment radios and comments doesn't display the analytical eye a lot of people think it does.

A lot of attitudes in the 2024 spaces that I have personally seen have centred a Carlos negativity- there have been dire criticisms of the journalistic bias towards him across the first 3 races of the year. Of course, if you don't like him then you're bound to be tired of hearing about him. But what I found interesting was the theories being circulated that he was paying his way into the media or that there was a behind-the-scenes scheme to keep media interest on him. Now, a lot of people perceived this to be a theory based on the culture surrounding Sainz's family wealth and his father's influence when in reality it was likely to be because of the increased interest around his circumstances going into the season- no seat for 2025, rumoured negotiations with several teams, surgery and first non Red Bull win of the season. to analyse this situation critically is not to say 'well there must be a secret reason and I will investigate' but to recognise that journalism is reliant on attention grabbing headlines- a man with no job and no appendix winning a race while still in the post-surgery recovery period is exactly the kind of narrative that will garner clicks. It would have been the same had it have been any other driver in that specific set of circumstances. There is a difference between critical thinking and assumptive analyses and oftentimes they can become conflated in the desire to prove a point.

This is the issue- a lot of people engage analytically with media in order to suggest a particular narrative. Every person is subject to bias, and when that bias is unchecked it can lead to a lot of analysis that are reliant on theory, speculation and assumption in order to maintain the subconscious perspective of the writer. This is why we see a lot of people use demeaning nicknames towards Charles on twitter an simultaneously view Carlos as undeserving in instagram comments- the integral points of their perspective on the driver rest on the moments which will develop their narrative view of the driver as the lesser. Critical engagement cannot rest solely on one the positive or the negative, otherwise you failing to engage critically by cherry picking a perspective in order to maintain a narrative. That is tabloid journalism, or gossip, at best.

I Am In Misery

It is also just not healthy for you as a fan to consistently engage in negative commentary and discourse. I mean that seriously this is a PSA if your fan engagement sees your negative criticism and commentary of your disliked driver outweigh the time you spend enjoying your interest then you need to take a step back and reassess how you want to participate because that is not sustainable for your mental wellbeing.

This is not to say that you must never hate, you must never criticise or say anything bad about someone we all do it- it's natural. But you have to ask yourself if you truly enjoy using another driver to uplift your favourite. Aren't his accomplishments enough to validate him alone?

Ive noticed a complete lack of will to celebrate- in my inbox right now are maybe around 15 asks all talking about how I shouldn't be happy with this weekends performance or else I dont understand F1. I argue the inverse,

I understand F1. I understand that this weekend was not the best performance Ferrari had to offer. I understand the impact of the team racing each other and Carlos' aggression during the sprint. And I have mentioned as much. However, I choose to focus on the positive aspects of the weekend. The tyre management from both drivers was impeccable to gain 2 positions each and maintain them finishing on tyres that were 40 laps old. They made an excellent recovery from the mishaps in qualifying that ultimately earned the team and themselves more points. We maintain 2nd in the constructors championship and 3rd and 4th in the drivers. There are issues that need to be discussed and resolved but ultimately this is not the worlds worst performance.

F1 is entertainment. I want to win, I want to succeed but I also want to be entertained. My mental health has seen a series uptick since I decided to directly seek entertainment. Sure, the drivers shouldn't have been racing the way they were, it had the potential to put both cars in a detrimental position, but it sure does make things more interesting!!! There's almost a sense of parasocialism within the community- a lot of people are hesitant to look for relief beyond the emotions of their favourite driver, and subsequently view every race as a failure in some aspect (just outside of the podium, on the podium but not p1, could've done better if it wasn't for xyz) and that negatively affects their experience as a fan and for other fans who don't share that perspective. It's almost like people have forgotten to enjoy the race, they're so preoccupied with looking for something to criticise.

Now this isn't to say you're not allowed to enjoy critical assessments of the success of races. But thats not what the majority of us are posting (it might be what some of you think you're posting, but you're not). I love watching video essays on races that are done properly with acknowledgement and awareness of bias. I don't love reading posts along the lines of 'why this race actually sucked' (not a real example) because it's not built from an analytical or critical perspective, just a discussion of the race and outcome through a lens of destructive pessimism.

End

This behaviour isn't specific to the Tifosi, it's an internet wide phenomenon. But I've chosen to directly comment on it here because as I said, I've never sen a community with so much hatred for itself. As of 2024, we are all on the same team right now. We have the right to hold our own opinions of the drivers and express those. We do not have the right to argue on the validity of other fans preferences, we do not have the right to directly enter fan spaces (ie the main tags) and spread destructive negativity about a driver nor do we have the right to harass blogs for whom they chose to support.

The inherent negativity is so calamitous to the community. It perpetuates the infighting, it furthers the negative narratives we have constructed of drivers, it only contributes to divide the community as both sides earn reputations of being toxic towards each other. And to an extent, yes . It is true, and that is disappointing. You have the right to choose your favourite driver. However, Charles and Carlos are both talented drivers- there is no need to drag one down to uplift the other. It is instigating behaviour and I'm sure a lot of people comment in that manner purposefully.

Be aware of your parasocial connection to a driver. if you find yourself criticising a driver for an action that you would not criticise your favourite for executing ask yourself why you view the action as negative circumstantially. If you are only able to assess races based on what could have happened, what better could have happened then ask yourself if you find this enriching; do you leave race weekends feeling good and excited for the next race or soured because things might have been better under different circumstances. Don't ignore the problems, acknowledge them and say but what are the positives as opposed to letting the failures undermine the successes.

just have a bit of fucking fun once in a while PLEASE .

as an endnote: I do recognise that the majority of insights and examples I have given in this reflection have been at the expense of team 55, again I would like to reiterate that as someone who primarily finds themself in 55 spaces I a naturally experience a greater exposure to negativity towards that driver as it usually tends to be maintagged or sent directly to myself or other 55 centric blogs. Just as the CL16 community is more likely to be exposed to and remember hatred towards Charles. In no way am I insinuating that 55 fans are incapable of or have not acted in the the same nature, to Charles' detriment. The toxicity remains prevalent on both extremes of the community.

this is a mass response to the people in my inbox thank you for your patience I didnt want to answer like 15 different asks about everything in slightly different ways

#not proofread bc didn’t want to #formula 1 #carlos sainz #charles leclerc #f1 #ferrari

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sharkrad08222222 · 1 month

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Misfits in Toyland Changeling the lost edition

I fuckin love @zal-cryptid 's Toylanders, so I decided to transfer a few into the works of Changeling: The lost, starting with someone who probably wants to be out of here. So HERE IS THE CHARATERS SHEET! ...ah shit forgot people dont know what changeling the lost is...Hold on let me get my thinking cap on, but first, a story of how I think Tammy got in and out of Arcaida.

Once(the Backstory, which I might not need to add and it probably wrong, but I aint wasting it.) Tammy Yokoi was not someone who you wanted to meet. Sure at first, they seemed ok, but give them anything important to do that she had no interest in and she would throw it aside, and probably make fun of you for thinking said task meant anything. This is what made Krampus catch his eye, where he followed her and saw how she was just The worst. Outing a Girl as intersex, outing the same girl as a Lesbian, which pretty much Destroyed her life, and being such a terrible babysitter, that she NEARLY caused one kid to die, and sad kid would have if Krampus didn't step in. Thinking of an apporeate punishment, he turned her into a tamagotchi and pulled her away into his little kingdom in Arcadia. As a tamagotchi, she was unable to feed or clean, herself, and died multiple times, only to come back and to starve all over again. This happened twice before being found, where she was thrust into many a Test to get her working, form being stuck in doom, Monkey Island, and various others, all in a way to improve her living situations. It wasn't all bad, she did meet a Woman named Mel, who got turned into a pull string Baby doll, who she grew rather fond of. but also met the girl she ruined the life of, Jen, who has an Axe to grind. Now.(Life as a changeling) She does not remember how she got out of her plastic prisons, all she remember is that Mel is in danger and she tried to stop it and she then found herself behind a pizzeria. She was quickly found by a summer patrol when she tried to get back to Arcaida, and now is a part of the local Summer court of (insert whatever big city of the state Tammy was form?) Here she is a Driven Elemental, working on getting connected with people to hopefully get back to Arcadia so she can give Krampus a piece of her mind. However, her time has changed her, form a bully to a more care taker role. She still packs quite the snark, but she does give a damn about the people around her.

Mask and Mien Most changelings are changed form their encounter, literally as they their bodies and souls where forced into new shapes,a Mien. but exiting and the Desire to remain hidden form their form captors looking for escapees, has created their mask. Tammy’s mask is pretty similar to her origins forum, but for the supernatural looking for tells , her heartbeat is more like a Hospital monitor, her eyes show a pixelated reflection, her voice has only the slightest hint of static.

Her Mien makes her looks like she’s been Rotoscoped into reality, with a body showing visible pixels. Not the most Terrifying but it’s unusual for sure. I would shit my self I say a person suddenly go form normal to Rotoscoped person holding rotoscoped shot gun. Seeming, Kith and Court. Seeming was you where in Arcadia Elementals were people made into forces of nature who got confined to a lined area, but eventually Freed, and now have a lot of power on their hands. As an Elemental of Code and Computer stuff, Tammy can cause computers to bleed pixels and for Monitors to shoot stuff out at people. Kiths are the roles people got forced into. Being Eletrical in nature, and now with the ability to manipluate a code, Tammy is a Levinquick with the abilithy telaport between the air waves. Carries alot of burner phones for this. Courts are a mix of support Group and survialist club. NO ONE wants to go back, the summer court espselly, who if they keepers are going to try to take them back, they are going to fight tooth, nail, bone and Whatever else to get them to back off. Tammy Joined the summer court cuase to her they seem like the ones most likely to barg into or at least teach the skills on how to do so. For her Mantle with the courts, she is a bit sharper with her insults.

Clarity And keeping it together. Clarity represents how "stable" a changeling is, how connected they are to reality. Clarity is how aware a Changeling is to the world around them, and creatian actions or events can cause this track to take damage Tammy has a common on of not wanting to keep people against their will, cause you know the whole being trapped in a tamagotchi again her will sort of thing. Tammy also doesnt not like it when she witnesses someone experiences Neglect, cause she knows how that feels. Starvation is in the same boat as Neglect, not only for witnessing it but also for feeling it. Another things that cause her clarity attacks is being reminded of pass behaviors. She Realizes that she was bad, and does not want to repeat them, BUT rather than face them, she instead runs from them, buries them. if you think that she could fall back into old habits…you are not wrong. Luckly though Touchstones, connections to realuty are mantianed and Clarity can be regained. Tammy's Touchstones are a group of kids she babysits for, a circle of kids if you will. was it the best idea to go baby sitting again, but it has given her Convection, with the small rings of kids she baby sits over months and week ends. plus cash for paying her half of the rent. Speaking of which what do all these dots mean? If one has played any TTRPGies, like a D&D, you probably know what skills and attaubies are, Willpower is willpower, burn it to be more likly to succed at a task Glamour is Emontial Fuel that both fuels abilities and existence. but merits is where things get intresting. Merits repersnet more specialzied skills, special training, innate Biological abilities, assets of all sorts, ETC, ETC. Changelings need Glamour to survive and can feel like shit if they dont get any so, but Tammy due to the deprecation she faced in Arcadia has developed a body that take some Glamour Fasting It will still catch up with her but not as fast, at least until she can find some, hedge fruit or People she can feed form. Having been gone for so long, she has been somewhat forgotten, her parents given up their search, and most of her fellow classmates having moved on, she’s a ghost. Pure Anonymity. No paper trail, no Criminal Record, none of that.

Her Drive and old skills form playing baseball has come back, make her a Relentless chaser.

She’s made some Allies outside of her summer court, a group of baby sitters, mostly being their to help with unruly kids or getting them to cover for her. They dont know her true nature, but that is liable to change, espelly with one going into clown collage. Elemental Warrior...We will talk about that later.

A mixed blessing form Her time in Arcadia, but her body has somehow Become Hardy out how to go on even when the ravages of the world are after her. but WAIT THEIR'S MORE due to the laws and red tape of Reality, changelings can take up contracts with the funablemtal forces of the universe. On the list their is the classic for all elementls elemental weapon! Using the code around her she shapes it into a weapons to use against her foes. Usually a shotgun of some sort, but with enough concentration he can summon an old Navel Cannon. Need to scare someone off? Overpowering Dread, is the ability to do just that. Tammy could Summons the illusion of a big scary monster but she usually just makes them leave though supernatural potent Insults.

Do you want to put a curse on a target, but dont have time for a HEX? Retrograde is the choice for you. Tammy's manfest , causing the targets phone to not work, computers to crash and for the GPS to break down. Sometimes you need to hide, or make it look like your unattiable and Trapdoor Spider’s Trick is ,well, the trick. Tammy causes any doors to appear barracked with the power of an anti virus software. Sometimes you need to make some one really pissed off, so that is why Tammy uses Sunburnt Heart is infusing someone with the anger of the sun(The sun is well known for being incredibly petty, still hasnt forgiven her kids cause they killed here dad), so using the power of the summer sun, Tammy can infuse people with the rage, and then direct those people away form her.

owever if tammy wants to use her own rage, Elemental Fury is the go too. Causing all the srceens to bleed out pixels what replate environments, while also damaging all who are caught in. A favor of hers is sending a crap ton of rude messages to a bunch of people causing them to riot in an area.

and this STILL isnt everything, but DEAR GOD I have been here for too long, and I am going to go now...and stat out Krampus.

#Changeling the lost #Misfits in Toyland #website plug I guess...#Kinda bad #Dear god Krampus...

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misrepresentedmorallygrey · 1 month

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PROPAGANDA

Jean Vicquemare

He's a minor character with a surprising amount of depth when u look into it!! But he is also a Cop (derogatory) and I feel a lot of people take the few things we know about him and twist it into an entirely different entity separate from the source material. I think he's an interesting character and should also be catapulted into the sun <3

This could not be more of a divisive character in this Fandom, which is hilarious considering he doesn't even have that much screen time. He is either seen as the devil incarnate or a poor little baby who's so sad! Being a fan of him means it's just best to block his tag here on Tumblr otherwise you'll tear your hair out at how frustratingly people misrepresent his purpose in the story.

Dark Pit

Most of Dark Pit's mischaracterization comes from the fact that he's in SSBU- everyone assumes he's like every other nintendo clone; evil and just a 'bad' version of the original. But he's not!! Even the characters in his own game think he's just cruel by nature, when he's never actually done anything wrong. He's a dick, yes, but wouldn't you be a bit pissy if you kept getting dragged into a war you want no part in, called a name crafted specifically to belittle your own existence?

Dark Pit was created when Pit, the original, was on a mission to destroy a mirror that would copy anything that stood before it, since the villians were using it to create an army. It's incredibly important to note that it does NOT create 'evil' versions or even just copy the body and leave the personality at home. It's a 1:1 conversion. Unfortunately, the villians also knew Pit would destroy the mirror quite directly, standing in front of it (or more accurately, flying kicking towards it) and triggering the copy to be made. It was shattered midway through creation, creating Dark Pit- something the villians were hoping would happen, as Pit is the last angel to exist and they REAAAALLY want their own angel.

Immediately everyone assumes Dark Pit is just evil by default- even the villian is gloating about her new minion, but he immediately rejects that and punches the villian and helps you in the fight. He steals her power and flies away after, but its important to realize that Dark Pit could've just allied with the villians for the same result, and instead chose to be alone. Sure, he's kinda a dick to Pit, but he hasn't done anything outright evil. Just took a dead god's power in order to fly and left.

Cue the next mission where Palutena calls Dark Pit 'twisted' and 'inherently corrupt' like ma'am where??? Hes just an asshole cmon, you would be too if your birth parent is a reflective piece of glass. You go off on a mission to try and KILL him, and he obviously defends himself- once again, he's done nothing outright wrong. He's rude and aggressive, yes, but he literally doesn't want ANY part of all this war between gods shit, and here you are killing him for merely existing. During the final battle of the mission Dark Pit tells Pit that he is his reflection, and that they're the same person- Dark Pit is just more than willing to say the things Pit refuses to admit to himself.

AND HE'S RIGHT. Dark Pit believes the gods are selfish, are using Pit as a tool for their own gain, and that the world would be better off without them since all they ever seem to do is cause war and destruction. If you pay attention to how Pit reacts to the world around him, he DOES share these beliefs but instead of acting on them, he just buries it. Pit will even snap at the gods about half-way through the game, telling them outright that its THEIR war that is destroying the planet and that THEY'RE all at fault. Dark Pit is NOT an evil clone; he's an inversion. Everything Pit hides away, he wears on his sleeve, and interestingly, everything Pit openly is, DARK PIT STILL IS TOO. He, just like Pit, hides it away instead of admiting it.

After the fight Dark Pit runs away, and shows up mainly as an ally to Pit going forward. The game mentions further how kinda fucked up Dark Pit's whole situation is- if Pit's soul is removed from his body, Dark Pit just DOESN'T EXIST during that time. If Pit dies, Dark Pit dies, and he has no control over it. He never even gets his own name- its either Dark Pit, or his nickname of 'Pit two' (Pitto). If Pit ever attacks Dark Pit and tries to kill him, there's little Dark Pit could ever really do; In the game he'll defend himself and try and kill you, but at that point he's dead either way. His life is barely his own.

Worst part is, SSBU confirms Dark Pit allied with Viridi after the events of Kid Icarus Uprising. I cannot STRESS how horrible that is for his characterization so far. Viridi is the god of nature and hates humanity for even existing, with her first appearance being her dropping NUKES onto towns and cities to purge humanity. And Dark Pit now works as a commander under her. Either Viridi has to mellow out REAL damn fast and stop nuking medieval humans, or they accidentally wrote Dark Pit to be a Human Murderer (we specifically know Viridi sends her commanders to kill off anyone who survives her nature nukes). Really hope this stays in the realm of 'not canon' because holy shit there's so many better options to pick from than the 'little girl god with a hit list and a factory of bombs'.

(Not even sure WHY Dark Pit, who thinks gods are selfish and use angels like tools, would want to ally with a god. Yes, he can't fly without a god's help, but even then why ally with the most vindictive and murder-happy god that isn't Hades??? Poor dude really just needs a break from all the gods to sort out who he is and to start building his own life independently from Pit)

#misrepresented morally grey #round 2 #bracket c #both bracket #disco elysium #jean vicquemare #kid icarus #dark pit

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nebelihood · 9 months

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Hey Arnold Study ENTRY01 "Arnold visits Arni"

GUuYS- As you may know I recently got re-obessed with Hey Arnold for a brief amount of time very recently. (Sadly I had to kill that obsession because of school and Looney tunes comic- but no worries, I'll try to come back as soon as the comic is finished jahsj qwq)

BUT I GOT LIKE REALLY OBSESSED LIKE SUPER- YOU HAVE NO IDEA HOW MANY HEY ARNOLD SCREENSHOTS I HAVE NOW- I HAVE A WORD DOCUMENTING EVERYTHING FROM ALMOST EVERY EPISODE (Except the ones from last seasons cause I was honestly tired of writting while eating and pausing and not being able to watch comfortably Hey Arnold-)

Dated 06/06/2023

Side note 01: I don't mean sl*ty in a demeaning way, I was trying to explain things to myself and let them clear to me x'0

Side note 02: This episode happens previously to "Married" episode.

Obviously the most interesting part of the episode was how Arnold switched Helga's personality to someone he actually developed feelings for and it wasn't too far away from Helga's real character like her poetry, her schemes to get closer to the guy she liked and general appearance. What's also interesting to note is how they changed the other characters, they basically switched their personalities between two characters, ex: Making phoebe dummer and Stinky smarter. Gerald more exaggerated and Sid cooler. Rhonda carless and Harold all about looks.

But when they switched Lila and Helga, Lulu came out more "sluty" and flirty. Traits that have nothing to do with Helga. And Hilda came out as inteligent and sweeter, which could be characteristics that could apply to Lila- only without her iconic "Ever so much" and exaggerated kindness. Those characters didn't seem to switch personalities. Maybe show unconscious beliefs of them?

It's a awesome episode to think about since it's all Arnold's dream so reflecting on the way he portrayed "helga" he must have some sort of idea of her, that she's nice deep down. Like he has confirmed he doesn't think Helga is mean for the sake for being mean in the Helga vs Patty episode. Like he has seen Helga act nice in the Rhonda costume party when she pretended to be Lila, like when he took care of her when she got amnesia and seemed too innocent, like when he convinced her to wash dishes and do the right thing. He must by this point, be almost sure there's a good nature underneath her despite how much she fights it.

About Lila... When they first started going out she was quite flirty. And she was also quite flirty when she went out with Arni, so maybe he perceives her attentions to certain degree a little sl+ty out of jealousy? idk just a thought.

Besides Lulu keeps Lila's way of communication "all so much about" "I'm all to certain that-"And the dream kept Arnold and Helga's tradition for crashing againts eachother. Making them essentially themselves and not them with switched personalities.

I think it's also interesting to see how Arnold also instantly fell in love"" when he saw Hilda. The first thing he asked was "Do I know you?" as to say she reminds him of someone he has seen cause he thinks he already knows her. The only possible answer is Helga.

IT's also interesting to see how Arnold bumped exactly with her as soon as she finished telling the moon if she would ever meet her one and true love.

I love Arnold's little shy hands hiding behind him, listening to her happily,,,

Arnold has witnessed to certain degree Helga reciting poetry like when Arni visited last time, so it's not crazy he made that connection to Hilda admitting she was reciting poetry.

"YEAhhhh"

ANYWAY in review, despite if he knows if Helga is a good person or not which at this point I'm sure he has a gut feeling, he must find her attractive rigth of the bait or at least feel attraction. Like when he complimented her the first time he saw her on "Helga on the couch" episode and because he doesn't even "know her" and he can't help to seem all goofy.

Note he also included Helga's "love sighs" on the dream, so maybe he has heard them before??

"I've never met anyone like you Hilda, and I really like you a lot"

He confessed to Hilda and Hilda confessed she liked Arni- This episode could be taken in two perspectives, one is that It's just like when Arni visited but this time is Arnold is Arni; so even if Arnold seems perfectly normal on this episode, he may have been a weirdo to everyone in town except to Lulu like it happened with Arni and Lila. This could be it but for wouldn't be completely accurate, Hilda would have had already been obsessed with Arni or idk maybe not. It could also be Arnold confessing to Lila and Lila saying she likes Arni, except for the whole intro to the situation reviewed on one ep. It's interesting he confessed to Hilda on his dream tho

(I didn't even understand myself what I meant but I'm gonna add that it could be Arnold falling in and out of love with Lila? And meaning he could fall in love with Helga if she showed her true nature? OR saying he already sort of likes her? Or likes what he thinkg he knows SHE IS??? LIKE I DON'T KNOW WHY I'M DOING THIS- I KNOW THEY ARE GONNA END UP TOGETHER I JUST WANT TO KNOW HE LIKED HER A LITTLE BACK TOO BACK THEN AND IT WASN'T THE RESULT OF HELGA SAVING HIS PARENTS AAAAA-)

Everyone chased Arnold except Hilda on Arnold's dream

Why was Arnold so happy that Helga was really Helga? If she was so nice in his dream (And so mean irl)? Was is because he really likes her as her is; or cause she doesn't like Arni like on his dream? LIKE WHAT DOES THAT MEAN? I MEAN I'M HAPPY HE'S HAPPY TO SEE THE REAL HELGA BUT DOES THAT MEAN HE LIKES HER MEAN OR WHAT I'M CONFUSED

Why was Arnold so happy to find out Lila only liked him? Cause she wasn't the "sl+ty" Lulu who did like him? MAybe he was just happy he wasn't on his nightmare anymore, still Hilda was no nightmare except till the end where she rejected him,,,, I love how he only adressed them like wth- the rest of your friends were the ones chasing you to your death and you don't wanna doble check that???

end

(HAHAHAJAHSJAHA)

#hey arnold!#hey arnold #entry #text post #arnold and helga #helga g pataki #arnold shortman

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triplesilverstar · 24 days

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Drinking makes you whimsy, no wonder you try not to anymore

Rating: 18+ Minor DNI

Pairing: Vash X F!Reader

CW: drinking, bad pick up lines, non-consensual touch

Word count: 1.9 K roughly

A/N: Chapter three of "Thoughts lost in the sand"

You have a drink, or several, and your thoughts get a way from you. Being a little more whimsical than usual as you turn down someone that seems to think you're drunk and an easy pick up. Too bad there isn't enough alcohol on the desert planet for that.

Another one shot that isn't quite in the right place... I swear someday I will tell a story in order... someday!

You weren’t sure what had come over you that night sitting there at the bar in the saloon. But the burn of the cheap whiskey, as it traveled down your throat, was reminding you of the past, so you’d kept going, still sipping on a glass of water between throwing the shots back.

Maybe it was the general joyful atmosphere that seemed to be permeating the air. Or maybe the fact you’d been on the desert planet long enough that the idea of remaining sober every night had finally gotten to you. Maybe the stress from trying to remain unattached from everything finally became too much. Or the most likely reason, A certain natural disaster was still following you around, a month after having rescued you from almost dying of an infection out in the desert.

He was like a dog with a bone and just wouldn’t let it go. You being the bone, following your every step citing that he was concerned since you’d refused to stay a moment longer than needed after waking up. Sure you’d been unsteady on your feet but it wasn't the first or last time you’d deal with it.

Which led to the current state you found yourself, five shots, or was it six in? Watching the general revelry that was currently happening inside the saloon. So when one of the locals slid up next to you, you weren’t expecting him to be so open with his attempt to try and pick you up. “What’s a good-looking lady like yourself doing here all alone?”

You find yourself giving him a once over, he’s cute, but not your type, well once upon a time he would have been. Anyone with a heartbeat had been. These days however you find a certain pair of downturned blue orbs taking up enough space in your thoughts to make you believe you’d become a little more selective. Too bad the goofball was never going to be interested in someone like you. “Not sure about the good-lookin' part. But a gals allowed to be by herself isn’t she?”

Turning your attention back to the bar you grab your next shot, number six, wait no seven, and toss it back. A line of fire racing down your throat, a welcome sensation you already know you’re going to regret in the morning. “Well, I think you’re pretty easy on the eyes” Oh boy, you’ve certainly heard that one before. “Want to go somewhere and get to know each other a little better?” At the soft weight landing on your hand, you feel a bubble of annoyance in your belly, gaze flicking to the palm resting across it, before making a flicking motion to remove it.

“Not interested in making friends tonight” you answer back, putting the bite into the word friends. You might be feeling the booze running through your system but you’re hitting the road again tomorrow.

“What if it was your last night? Don’t you want to just live in the moment?” He’s persistent, you'll give him that, a wistful smile breaking out across the reflection you can see of yourself in the mirror behind the bar. It has nothing to do with the man trying to get into your pants and everything to do with living, something you’re slowly realizing you might need to do a little more of.

“Living in the moment can be fun.” You watch a grin forming on his face like he thinks he’s convinced you. “But when all you do is live in the moment, you realize that’s all life really is, is a series of moments that lead to something much larger. A tapestry made from the threads that those moments make up, weaved together by the passage of time. Those moments made of strings slowly but surely become the tapestry of your life.” As you’ve spoken you’ve watched the grin on his face fade, lips slowly lowering until the image reflected shows only a frown and glaring narrowed eyes. “So sorry that I'm not interested in living in the moment with you .”

Reaching into your jacket to grab your wallet, your eyes narrow when his hand grabs your wrist a little more insistent. “Well, what if I’m not interested in what you think? You seem pretty under the weather with those shots you’ve had.” Snorting you roll the joint with a snap-like speed feeling his grip loosen in surprise, allowing you to pull your hand away.

“I’ve got to be a lot more wasted than that to be taken advantage of.” You might be tipsy but you’re far from the point of being unaware of your abilities, bills placed on the counter you depart, heading outside. Once past the doors and into the street you take a long inhale of the cold desert air, looking up towards the sky that even with the lights of the saloon and town it’s not enough to blot out the specks painting the dark canvas above your head.

At the sound of the door opening you let the air out of your lungs slowly, wishing it was tainted with nicotine. What they offer as cigarettes here doesn’t exactly answer that craving buried deep in your skull, you’d tried the sticks made from worms before and found them lacking. “You don’t need to leave just because I am, I don’t need a babysitter.” You should have expected your second shadow to be only a few steps behind you, that wish for nicotine and another shot briefly flash in your head.

“Some interesting words you said back there.” Of course, he’d ignore your comment about him following you. Standing beside you, a flick of your eyes to see he’s staring upwards as well. “Almost makes me think there’s more rattling around in that brain of yours than you let on.” Snorting again you start walking away, heading towards the hotel you’re staying at, gaze kept skyward.

“I could say the same about you Stampede.” A high-pitched whine follows your words almost as if you’ve once again hurt his pride.

“I thought I told you to call me Vash. Aren’t we friends now?” Why the hell does he sound like a kicked puppy when he says things like that?

“Nope. You’re still an annoyance that’s sort of growing on me, like mold I can’t get rid of” Stopping in the middle of the road, you smile, unaware of his gaze on your face. “A shooting star” streaking for a scant second across the sky, it’s the first one you’ve seen in a while. The night sky in this area of the planet normally shines from worms which are oddly missing tonight.

“Aren’t you supposed to make wishes on shooting stars?” you hear the hope in his voice, expecting him to drop another comment that borders on him attempting to flirt with you.

“Maybe. But stars don’t actually shoot. Probably just a hunk of rock burning up as it enters the upper atmosphere” reaching up to wipe the dust you feel under your nose. Gaze still skyward you don’t notice him giving you an appraising look. “I miss the Phthartic” muttering under your breath before you start walking again, missing the raised eyebrow on your sort of companion's face.

“You are something else. You make comments romanticizing moments in your life but you won’t wish on shooting stars? I don’t get you, Snipes.” You keep walking, ignoring the contemplative lilt in his low words that you pretend you missed.

“It’s not a star. If you want romantic words, look to the sky, the light from those stars has spent millions if not billions of years before it’s reached your eyes. Their cold light is nothing but a distant memory because there’s no doubt that in this moment, some of those stars are burnt out. Take comfort in the fact that the memory of them and their existence in the universe remains because we can see them, never knowing the pain of seeing that light go out.” While you can’t see him, you sense that he freezes like you’ve caught him off guard with your words.

“To wander in the space between those stars and see all the marvels of the universe, wondering if maybe the next place you wind up will be your next great adventure. To see just how small you are, a speck in this great cosmos. Yet, at the same time, everything that makes you up was made in the heart of one of those dying stars cast out from their death adding to the beauty that makes up this thing called life.” In your state, you don’t realize that unconsciously you’re lifting your hands up towards the sky palm up. Eyes shining with the delight lacing your words as you talk about the endless cosmos, and certainly unaware of the way Vash is looking at you painted in the light of the moons dotting the sky.

“I’m starting to think you should drink more often, you’re not as guarded” you snort, like a switch has been flipped your mind returning to the current moment, pausing to look around. “Our hotel is the other way” Glancing at him you growl, feeling your face flush shoving your hands in your pockets at the casual way he has his thumb jerking over his shoulder.

“You’re an ass” grumbling as you walk back towards him, a large smile plastered on his face. A smile you want to wipe off that goofy-looking visage that is starting to show up in your dreams with your fist.

“That sounds more like the angry bounty hunter I know” As you pass him you pause, shoving an elbow into his side. “What was that for!” You don’t answer, just keep moving forward toward the hotel, starting to feel the buzzing at the back of your skull. Telling you, you’re going to regret drinking those six, no seven shots in the morning.

Sure enough, you wake up hungover somewhat surprised you are in the hotel room by yourself. Last time you’d been drinking you’d woken up wedged between two other people and sore. That’d been a while ago before you’d ended up on the desert planet, there was a reason you’d stopped drinking but some old habits were hard to break when you were getting tired of wandering.

Dressing quickly, bag thrown on your back, and planning to slip out the door, scowling at the sight of Vash waiting for you just outside the panel of metal painted to look like wood. “Good morning! You look like you’re in rough shape this morning.” You’re ready to clock him and that stupid sunny grin on his face, that would make his regret that cute little wave.

“Stuff it Stampede” The words are so low you feel the vibrations in your throat as you growl them out at him. Stomping past the blond thorn in your side, you might want to clean his clock but it isn’t his fault you’re in a foul mood.

“What? No waxing poetry about the sky like last night?” Gead-snapping up you feel your eyes go wide as you really take in his appearance, a shit-eating grin gracing his features like he knows some secret that he shouldn’t. You don’t remember anything you said last night.

Yea, time to stop drinking and stick to it this time.

You leave yourself far too open when you drink. And that’s an opening you can’t afford, not when you can’t just take off the way you were used to. No. This time you’re stuck on this crappy desert plant and no way off world. A prison that the rest of humanity has to face as well.

Back to series

#vash the stampede x reader #vash the stampede #trigun stampede #trigun #twink writes #Bullets Bandits Ghosts & Typhoons #tristamp #vash x reader #vash x you

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katyspersonal · 2 years

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Kin headcanons (Bloodborne)

- There are roughly three types of Kin - celestial, marine and cursed.

- Celestial Kin are associated with lumenweed that reaches to the stars for salvation, you know, the flowers, the effect of Milkweed, etc. And with blue starry aesthetic, naturally. Prime examples are Living Failures, Celestial Emissaries and Ebrietas herself. Flora too, before she became more beastly.

- Celestial =/= cosmic, all Kin are connected to the cosmos! Cosmos is generally a higher plane of existence, whereas ‘stars’ is more specific affiliation. Ebrietas is daughter of the stars, not cosmos, either. A bit slightly lost in translation of boss names ( x ).

- Marine Kin are, naturally, connected to the ‘bottomless sea’. Kos and OoK are prime examples. Marine kin is also what Research Hall patients were initially aiming for, before they turned to the stars instead, to avoid horrors of the sea as it is full of human dregs. Brainsucker is a marine Kin too - this is what happens with a patient that became addicted to brain fluid to the no-return point but didn’t die. This is also why they stopped letting unsuccessful patients return to their homes - they just turn into Brainsuckers in the wild!

- Cursed Kin are affiliated with arachnid theme and ‘evil’ yellow eyes, examples are Amygdalas, Children of Rom and Gardens of Eyes! Interestingly, internal name for Gardens of Eyes are ‘cthulhu spider’. Gardens of Eyes were Research Hall patients that pursued cursed route instead of celestial one to be saved from the Sea, and were taken back in Byrgenwerth to live some semblance of life and recovery, since Choir had no interest in them.

- There are hybrid Kin! Fluorescent Flower is a hybrid between celestial and cursed Kin - note arachnid legs and body elongated in similar fashion as Amygdalas, but it does have glowing plantlife on its body! Milkweed reflects what would a celestial+marine hybrid be like. Rom is the only example of all three affiliations meeting - celestial (her glowing plants), marine (tentacley tails) and cursed (spider legs and bloated skull full of eyes).

- There are mutants - people who merely have their bodies change to adapt to affiliating with Great Ones better, without becoming their ‘family’! Nightmare Apostles like Patches are affiliated with cursed Kin, everyone in Fishing Hamlet is affiliated with marine Kin. Willem and Slime Scholars mutated to affiliate with celestial Kin better; even though slime scholars are ‘liquid’, don’t forget that Ebrietas and augur slugs are creepy and wet as well! Marine is less necessarily wet and more as in, marine creatures. Jellyfish, fish, squids, all that.

- Gravekeeper Scorpion is essentially a failed Fluorescent Flower, someone too far gone into being a zombie (or whatever happens with Pthumerians that have been pushing for immortality too far) to ascend. It used to happen often, too, as celestial and cursed affiliations oppose each other, like angels and demons - marine affiliation is value neutral.

- Winter Lanterns and Brain of Mensis are the closest thing to marine+cursed hybrid seen, notice them being full of evil eyes and seeming quite like jellyfish (Lantern’s head and Brain having many tentacles underneath). They are unique cases though - rather than it being one person mutating, they consist of many dead people (head of Wintern Lantern made of messengers and Brain of Mensis made of people - everyone else in Mensis Ritual room).

- Whereas Augurs of Ebrietas exist as their own entity, parasites like those found within Kos and phantasms used for Call Beyond are, indeed, parasites. Sea parasites nudge the host to crave Insight and brain fluid even more, which did not help Research Hall patients at all. Call Beyond, similarly, causes hunger if not addiction for being in touch with the ‘stars’ - notice how its glowing tendrills are similar to what ‘advanced’ celestial emissaries protrude from their skulls:

- There is no cursed kind of parasitic phantasm from what we’ve seen in the game, however Vermin is the closest thing to such. It is born from human dregs, whereas Call Beyond is external cosmic parasite, and marine parasite is mix of a both human dregs and the divine.

- Needless to mention that Kos Parasite is not exclusive to her - variants found in dungeons are known as Uncanny and Lost parasites, without her name mentioned. It is entirely possible though that dungeons had experienced the flood of the great Sea long ago - dungeons are QUITE wet, and also, for example, this creature is found in both Fishing Hamlet and dungeons:

#bloodborne #bloodborne headcanons #bloodborne theory #use later #thats a longread lol #i am probably better off doing illustrated lore on this #but with my sort of ADHD i might forget all my ideas the next day so i am writing as read only for now

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wordsandrobots · 8 months

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IBO reference notes on … the Gundams (part 1)

[Part 1 | Part 2 | Part 3 | Addendum 1]

Or: a spotter’s guide to the Calamity War.

[Note: I tried to post this twice today before figuring out that one of the images was causing it to be consigned to Tumblr oblivion. Apparently a shot of Lt. Crank's gloved hand was too racy for this site. Yeah.]

I said at the time that the fanfic Of Obsessions and Erotemes was written as an alternative to writing an essay expanding on my thoughts regarding the Gundams in Iron-Blooded Orphans. This is probably not strictly accurate, however, and I've been struck by the urge to take a figurative walk through the canonical examples out of the 72 Gundam frame type mobile suits.

I want to focus on the Gundams as they started out during the Calamity War, as far as that is possible, and what this says about the nature of the conflict. I will probably follow up at some point with notes on the mobile armours too, since they are the flip-side of this narrative. As I’ve had cause to mention before, I’m generally content with not knowing too much about the historical event that serves as the basis for IBO’s world-building. I think that adds rather than subtracts from the story. Still, it is fun to play with what we get and piece together an impression of what happened three hundred years prior to the series’ beginning.

For the purposes of not writing a post ten thousand words long, I’ve split the Gundams into three groups based on numerical position in the master list, which is of course taken from the Ars Goetia. Here, I will be drawing on Crowley’s edition.

All images shown here are either borrowed from the Gundam Wiki or are my own screenshots.

As with all my posts like this, spoilers are present for everything.

The Gundam frame

Let’s start with what is under the hood, to whit: the Gundam mobile suit frame.

I covered some of this in my post on the aesthetics of the mobile frame concept, but the most important detail about the Gundam type is how human-like its proportions are, in both limb structure and eye placement. Unlike other frames, this is intended from the start to be used with an Alaya-Vijana system, so designing it to more closely approximate the human form makes a great deal of sense.

At the same time, there is something fittingly demonic about the skeleton, down to the claw-like fingers. However it must be noted that this is specifically Barbatos’ frame; the talons on on the feet are not reflected on the others. Indeed, based on the design work for Kimaris and Flauros, the feet are the part that varies the most from machine to machine.

A Gundam’s power – both in the sense of motive force and superior strength – comes from the twin Ahab reactors making up its torso. It’s the only mobile weapon in Iron-Blooded Orphans confirmed to have multiple reactors, with the implication that this boosts the output beyond simply adding the two together. Indeed, when operating at full capacity against a mobile armour, Barbatos seems barely able to contain its own energies.

Ancillary material states Ahab reactors are made ‘on a plant near a fixed star’, implying a difficult process to begin with (or at least a factory in orbit of the sun). Synchronising the reactors so they run in parallel is adding extra complexity on top of that, which is one of the reasons Gundam construction is a lost art. These things are the peak of mobile suit design and have never been equalled since they quite literally saved the world.

A Gundam, then, is not merely another weapon. It is the maximisation of human capacity, allowing a pilot to exceed their bodily limitations to destroy an inhuman enemy. We don’t know for sure the Calamity War pilots ended up in the same sorry state as Mikazuki (though the taleof Agnika Kaieru’s spirit residing inside Bael carries some interesting implications). But we do know the Alaya-Vijnana places extraordinary pressure on human physiology by its very nature, and the Gundams themselves come with competing limiters as a result. One that disengages in proximity to a mobile armour, allowing the full force of the reactors to be unleashed; another that switches on at that point, to stop this burst of power immediately overwhelming the operator. Only by accepting the danger can the pilot proceed with their attack.

It’s a duality of ultimate strength and ultimate risk that makes the Gundam frames seem like suitably desperate creations. They are the demons that prevented total apocalypse, while consuming their pilots body and soul.

ASW-G-01 Bael

The first king of the Hell, and therefore presumably the first Gundam to have been constructed. From latter machines, there is the suggestion that deployment order did not match the numerical codes, so it isn’t entirely clear if we can solidly say they are numbered in the order they were built. But it seems reasonable to assume that this represents the start of Gundam operational history.

If we can take Bael to exist in the present exactly as it did in the War, it is a relatively simple affair, sporting nothing more flashy than a pair of wing-like boosters (I say wing-like purely because they are not functionally wings; they’re more an elaborate jet-pack). From a design point of view, Bael otherwise matches exactly to the template set by the series’ hero machine, Barbatos: the armour and thruster placement is identical and we may take this to be the default.

The combat philosophy behind this machine appears to be the same too: strike fast and strike sharp. It follows that Agnika Kaieru was the kind to lead from the front. Indeed, kit manual text makes it clear he was self-sufficient in battle, taking down mobile armours solely with his twin swords. Given McGillis holds his own against an entire fleet for a while, this doesn’t feel like a stretch and it certainly explains why the man became such a legend.

The symbol on Bael’s left shoulder is the original Gjallarhorn logo, which more directly presents the source of the organisation’s name: the horn that sounds Ragnarök. This would later be elaborated into the flag used in the present while remaining as a some sort of badge/pin or medal on officers’ uniforms. I find that fitting, that something simple would be built up over time into a grander image, disguising the root truth. In many ways, that sums up Bael’s place in history.

From the Ars Goetia:

The first Principal Spirit is a King ruling in the East, called Bael. He maketh thee to go Invisible. He ruleth over 66 Legions of Infernal Spirits. He appeareth in divers shapes, sometimes like a Cat, sometimes like a Toad, and sometimes like a Man, and sometimes all these forms at once. He speaketh hoarsely. This is his character which is used to be worn as a Lamen before him who calleth him forth, or else he will not do thee homage.

Notably, the sigil used for Gundam Bael’s interface does not simply replicate the 'canonical’ seal from the Ars Goetia but rather reinterprets it.

Clearly OG Gjallarhorn had graphic designers on staff. Also, Bael’s main console screen is of a uniquely narrow design, in a rather elaborate housing. It would seem the cockpits were refined for later models, simplifying things towards a standard pattern seen in Kimaris and Gusion that would itself go on to become the standard for Gjallarhorn 'suits.

ASW-G-04 Gamigin

Pretty much all we know about Gamigin is that it exists, it was originally piloted by Kalf Falk and it made it out of the Calamity War in one piece. Oh and someone in the armoury department was having a laugh the day they issued this Gundam its weapons.

Seriously though, if Bael is the default, this is a heavy-duty model. Gamigin looks a hell of a lot less manoeuvrable, even accounting for the extra thrusters built into its skirt, and its standard-sized arms appear positively weedy compared to the heft of the body and legs. Clearly though, that was a trade-off deemed acceptable for the sake of destructive capacity.

The giant Gatling gun speaks for itself, but the revolver axe is the more interesting item here. As silly as it looks, it’s represents the (presumed) earliest incorporation of Dàinsleif weaponry into a Gundam frame mobile suit.

'Dàinsleif’ is a term used to refer to anything that launches javelin-like projectiles at high speed with the intent of puncturing nano-laminate armour. It’s unclear if the present ban on their use extends to smaller-scale versions like this, which is a point-blank deployment of the technology.

The blunt side of that axe is designed to strike an enemy and fire a spike straight through it. Crude but effective. Or so we can assume given this machine was piloted by one of the first Seven Stars and therefore must have destroyed a great many mobile armours.

From the Ars Goetia (Samigina/Gamigin):

The Fourth Spirit is Samigina, a Great Marquis. He appeareth in the form of a little Horse or Ass, and then into Human shape doth he change himself at the Request of the Master. He speaketh with a hoarse voice. He ruleth over 30 Legions of Inferiors. He teaches all Liberal Sciences, and giveth account of Dead Souls that died in sin. And his Seal is this, which is to be worn before the Magician when he is Invocator, etc.

This is one of several demons with multiple names listed in the Ars Goetia. There doesn’t appear to be any pattern to which was picked as the ID for the corresponding Gundam.

ASW-G-08 Barbatos

Teiwaz are stated to have restored Barbatos to its original state so we can assume the 4th form represents the version that fought in the Calamity War. Given this, it likely used a katana in battle, as the sword Teiwaz provides bears the same logo as the 'suit and we know from their work on Flauros that Gundams store information about their own weaponry (see also Mikazuki’s sudden competence with it when he connects deeper to Barbatos).

Intriguingly, with the retroactive introduction of predecessor designs, it appears Barbatos takes cues from both Bael and Gamigin, which ties these three low-numbered models together nicely. It is also relatively unspecialised in comparison, lacking the features that mark out the previous two. When found, it had a small buckler shield built into a gauntlet on its left forearm, similar to those the 5th form in the series would use. However, there’s no indication if this was used as a mount for mortars like the later version, leaving us with a machine that appears to have been a simple melee combatant.

The absence of gimmicks showcases just how powerful Gundams are in comparison to other mobile suits, at a baseline. In any given fight during Season 1, Barbatos is faster, stronger, and more adaptable than its opposition, and while we see it built up with add-ons over the course of the series, those often seem to get in the way or provide only passing advantages.

Since my focus is on the Calamity War, I’m not going to go into any detail regarding the Lupus and Lupus Rex forms. But I will posit the idea Barbatos’ original pilot was of a different temperament to Mikazuki. If it is indeed their 'ghost’ who comes to his aid in Edmonton – some trace left behind in the system that allows him to understand the katana in the nick of time – they seem to have been a master of that weapon, favouring lethal precision, in stark contrast to Mikazuki’s gradual transformation into an animalistic, living weapon.

(The mace that Mikazuki leads with seems to have been something Maruba bought for possible use if he could ever get Barbatos running, rather than a relic of it previous operations.)

From the Ars Goetia:

The Eighth Spirit is Barbatos. He is a Great Duke, and appeareth when the Sun is in Sagittary, with four noble Kings and their companies of great troops. He giveth understanding of the singing of Birds, and of the Voices of other creatures, such as the barking of Dogs. He breaketh the Hidden Treasures open that have been laid by the Enchantments of Magicians. He is of the Order of Virtues, of which some part he retaineth still; and he knoweth all things Past, and to Come, and conciliateth Friends and those that be in Power. He ruleth over 30 Legions of Spirits. His Seal of Obedience is this, the which wear before thee as aforesaid.

Again, we see a redesign of the seal for Gundam Barbatos’ start-up sigil.

I like the choice to make the lines more dynamic.

ASW-G-11 Gusion

We don’t know if this is what Gusion started out looking like. Gusion was found in a debris zone and passed through various hands before it reached the Brewers, and we know the Brewers’ Man Rodis are custom jobs, more heavily armoured than standard Rodi frame models. On balance, this is probably something they cooked up to fit their requirements.

But gives us an idea of the limits of a Gundam frame’s flexibility. The arms and legs have been stretched outwards from the main body to accommodate the armour load-out. You can see a glimpse of the piston that operates the hip joint under the skirt in the image above, providing a sense of where the legs have been moved. Quite how this works is unclear since we only see the head exposed when the Turbines start deconstructing this form. The fact it does work emphasises just how far the Gundams can be reconfigured. The Turbines even go so far as installing extra arms into the Rebake version given to Akihiro, seemingly with no issues at all.

Gusion also provides an example of the fate suffered by quite a number of the Gundam frames: that of being lost and forgotten after battles during the Calamity War. The figure provided for how many frames are known to have survived is 26, but it’s unclear where that sits in the timeline of IBO canon, throughout which several Gundams are uncovered from previously hidden resting places. Certainly it appears only a minority of such 'suits remain in Gjallarhorn’s custody. While some have most likely been destroyed outright, many may still be drifting among debris fields or buried at the sites of battles from three hundred years ago.

It’s a neat conceit, leaving fertile ground for fanfiction or spin-offs to play on, and underscores that these machines belong to a bygone era most have forgotten about.

From the Ars Goetia:

The Eleventh Spirit in order is a great and strong Duke, called Gusion. He appeareth like a Xenopilus. He telleth all things, Past, Present and to Come, and showeth the meaning and resolution of all questions thou mayest ask. He conciliateth and reconcileth friendships, and giveth Honour and Dignity unto any. He ruleth over 40 Legions of Spirits. His Seal is this, the which wear as aforesaid.

The connection between the machine or pilot and the Ars Goetia descriptions is somewhat variable throughout this list. In some instances there’s nothing obvious at all. However, I love that Gusion bestows honour and dignity because of how beautifully it ties into Akihiro’s arc. This said … I don’t actually know what a 'Xenopilus’ is. My first thought was 'Xenopus’ and a frog motif certainly would explain Gundam Gusion’s appearance. But I don’t think that’s right? Answers on a postcard, please.

That’s where we’ll leave things for today. I will probably post the next instalment sometime tomorrow.

Other reference posts include:

IBO reference notes on … Gjallarhorn (Part 1)

IBO reference notes on … Gjallarhorn (Part 2)

IBO reference notes on … Gjallarhorn (corrigendum) [mainly covering my inability to recognise mythical wolves]

IBO reference notes on … three key Yamagi scenes

IBO reference notes on … three key Shino scenes

IBO reference notes on … three key Eugene scenes

IBO reference notes on … three key Ride scenes

IBO reference notes on … the tone of the setting

IBO reference notes on … character parallels and counterpoints

IBO reference notes on … a perfect villain

IBO reference notes on … Iron-Blooded Orphans: Gekko

IBO reference notes on … an act of unspeakable cruelty

IBO reference notes on … original(ish) characters [this one is mainly fanfic]

IBO reference notes on … Kudelia’s decisions

IBO reference notes on … assorted head-canons

IBO reference notes on … actual, proper original characters [explicit fanfic – as in, actually fanfic. None of them have turned up in the smut yet]

IBO reference notes on … the aesthetics of the mobile frame

IBO reference notes on … mobile suit designations

#gundam #gundam iron blooded orphans #gundam ibo #tekketsu no orphans #g tekketsu #gundams #gundam frames #reference #notes #ars goetia

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manonamora-if-reviews · 9 months

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A World Without You by jaunefleur

An Anti-Romance Jam entry. > Note: this entry was submitted as a demo. containing a prologue and 3 Chapters. The review will only reflect what is there. Still the demo is quite long. I maybe needed a few hours to read it all (on playthrough).

Entry - More by Jaune - @jaunefleurwrites CW: terminal illness, impending death, anxiety, death, teen pregnancy

Dealing with a World without You

You are going to die. You know it. Nothing will change from the facts that your illness is incurable and that you only have few moments left before your inevitable demise. You resigned yourself to your fate. But when Damin, a bubbly bubblegum-haired [person] crosses your path, everything you thought about life flips upside down. This is the premise of the project. At the current state of the demo, you've met that person, but sparks haven't quite flown just yet between you two.

From the start, it is clear AWWY is quite anchored in the Tumblr/CoG school of IF, with its custom UI, expected extensive length, and flowery style. However, instead of focusing on branching and choices, AWWY takes a more linear approach with a twist. This makes sense with the story told, considering the MC's fate is sealed - unless a magical cure comes at the last minute, they will die no matter what. So, rather than giving player a plethora choices, the demo subvert expectations by switching POVs within a chapter, limiting choices to one or two for flavour within a chapter. You may start the chapter with your MC, before the story is cut to your mother's POV or your brother's or Damin's. Parsed through those, you are treated to some flashbacks, exploring the different character's pasts, and how those events shaped their present. This creates an interesting dynamic, making the story feel at times more like a movie than and interactive game. The switches between POV or time period are also clearly indicated at the start of each part. Having to control the MC through the eyes of another character was a bit surreal, but in a good way!

Maybe a downside to this approach is the evident lack of player agency throughout the story. Even with the MC referred as 'you' in their POV, you feel more like a spectator than an active participants. While again, this make sense considering the context - you can't affect the end - it does take a bit away from the interactivity of the game, making the project look more kinetic than interactive in nature. This is not an inherent critique of this aspect of the project, as kinetic stories can pull a bigger punch than a choke-full-of-choice game. And I can see this story being one of those. It is just that, at time, some opportunities to elevate a scene through interactivity were missed, which could have made important beats more impactful (like the scene where the MC claims to hate everyone). On the other hand, it did work quite well for the character creation, avoiding any potential choice-fatigue for the player by spreading out those choices throughout the story - only bringing up relevant elements when necessary.

I struggled as well with the pace of the story, as it went back and forth between past and present, and between POVs, making something the sequence of events a bit... confusing. A perhaps good example would be when Damin meets the MC at the butterfly grove*, for the first time it seems, but doesn't seem to recognise the MC (who turns out to be their neighbour) in the next chapter, or whether Damin arrived before the MC into town or the reverse. This resulted in some high-pressure events, like the fight between the MC and Damin, feeling a bit coming out of nowhere (unless it was supposed to be a flashforward?). In the same vein, it seemed like the prose focused a bit too much on (over)telling the player what was happening, rather than let the scene speak for itself. This lead often to repetitions in one same passage/paragraph*. I thought this was a bit of a shame, since there are pretty poetic descriptions of actions/setting, but were drowned in explanations. A bit more TLC on the prose will help the flow of the story. For example, hinting at a character's feelings through action only (instead of the action + description of the feeling) - like breathing a bit too fast or twitching when anxious, or freezing when someone is angry talking to you - or use punctuation and formatting to establish at a tone (instead of describing the tone then the uttered words) - like three dots to show uncertainty or disdain, or a en-dash to choke on words when emotional. *Sidenote: this scene felt pretty magical with the butterflies dancing! *Repetition can be useful, but should be used in moderation for strongest impact.

Underneath it all, there is a good base for an interesting story. The characters, though clearly flawed (good!), feel believable and quite human (especially the moody teenagers). Their pain will still pull your heartstrings. It is set up to be a tearjerker, for sure! Most introduced characters have clear motivations, goals, and challenges to overcome - mainly carrying on after MC passes. It is quite clear where the story is going, and it could make for quite the heartbreaking and bittersweet conclusion. Out of all characters introduced so far, I particularly enjoyed Damin's sassy grandmother. She seems like a treasure, and a needed comedic relief in this heavy story. I hope we see more of (and learn more about) her in future chapters.

Another aspect I quite enjoyed was the addition of assets in the game, particularly the images. The demo gave a neat way of choosing Damin's gender (and inherent design), as well as customising our room (by choosing one of "our" drawing). Seeing our sketchbook getting filled as we move from chapter to chapter, used as an alternative to a written journal, was a nice touch. I hope more are planned for the future, their designs were lovely. Note: I picked the hippopotamus :P

The premise of the game made me thing of The Fault in Our Stars by John Green, which I think it took inspiration from?

There was supposed to be audio according to the credits, but I didn't hear any music during my playthrough. I had some small issues with the game itself, with the OpenDyslexic font not working, or the colour palette not being quite accessible (not contrasted enough) for easy reading. I also picked up on a few wrong pronouns for Damin and wrong names for myself.

#A World Without You #jaunefleur #interactive fiction #wip #2023 #twine game #anti romance jam

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xiyao-feels · 1 year

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I was looking at the scene of LXC and LWJ and the bunnies—it's a memory in a dream, in the second incense burner chapter, so I suppose you could reject it but I think the most natural interpretation is that it's just how it happened. And it's really interesting!

(scene + thoughts on LXC's characterization and the Jades' relationship below the cut—plus a very little bit of xiyao, lol)

ER translation, ch 119

Not long afterwards, he managed to make out the whispering voices of two boys. He walked closer, finding that one of their voices sounded quite familiar, “… Nobody had ever kept any within the bounds of the Cloud Recesses. To do such a thing is unheard of.”

After a moment of silence, the other boy answered, somewhat dejected, “I know. But… I have already made my promise. I cannot go against my word.”

Wei WuXian picked this up. He sneakily glanced over. As expected, conversing amidst a clearing of green grass was Lan XiChen and Lan WangJi.

It was a spring day vibrant with soft winds. The young brothers seemed to be two immaculate pieces of jade, reflected against each other. Both were dressed in snowy robes, their wide sleeves and forehead ribbons flapping in the wind, almost as if they were a painting. The Lan WangJi at this point in time was also just about sixteen. He frowned slightly, as though he was worried about something. What he held in his arm was a white rabbit, sniffing its pink nose, and beside his foot was another rabbit, its long ears perked up as it stood clinging to his boot, trying to climb up.

Lan XiChen, “How could the casual remarks between two boys be considered a serious promise? Is it really because of this?”

Lan WangJi looked at the ground and said nothing.

Lan XiChen smiled, “Fine. Then if by any chance Uncle asks of this, you must explain things to him properly. These days, you have been spending just a little too much time on them.”

Lan WangJi nodded solemnly, “Thank you, Brother.” With a pause, he added, “… They will not affect my studies.”

Lan XiChen, “I know, WangJi. However, you must not tell Uncle who gave these to you. Or else, out of rage, he would make you send them away no matter what.”

Hearing this, it seemed as though Lan WangJi hugged the rabbit in his arms even tighter. Lan XiChen smiled. He reached out and poked the rabbit’s pink nose with his fingertip, before leisurely walking away.

So some thoughts:

a) that bit with LXC poking the rabbit's nose is adorable, help. Has this been in any of the adaptations? Is there any fanart of this? I must see it.

b) I think this is a really interesting look at the relationship between the young Jades, specifically. In particular it's a great example of how on the one hand LXC is extremely indulgent and supportive of LWJ and how, on the other hand, they both consider LXC to have legitimate authority over LWJ, which he exercises (legitimately). I think there can be a tendency to, I suppose, understand that authority negatively, but that's not really how it's written: both LXC's authority over and correcting of LWJ, and his support and indulgence of LWJ, are presented as part of the same good relationship. They don't contradict each other; they work together.

And it is clear that LXC does correct him. He's supporting LWJ on the bunnies (and instructing him not to tell LQR the details so the bunnies don't get sent away!), even though "To [keep bunnies within CR] is unheard of", and he's also telling him that he's been spending a bit too much time on them lately. And it is entirely as a loving older brother, but I think if your understanding of their relationship doesn't include that kind of loving correction, it is missing something.

(This isn't the only time this happens, to be clear. In the lectures at CR arc, of course, but we also see it near the beginning, when LWJ drags MXY home, and LXC cancels it and tells him to treat his guests better, and also in a variety of other places but listing all of them is outside the scope of this post.)

(b ii. I do think this makes an interesting contrast with WWX and JC; one of the fault lines there was that while WWX absolutely loved JC I'm not sure he ever saw JC as having legitimate authority over him. Which was a real problem when JC was actually his sect leader.)

(b. iii And it's also interesting to consider in light of NMJ's relationship with NHS and JGY both! One of NMJ's failings is, I think, his failure to actually effectively correct NHS. Obviously this is not just on him, NHS plays a role here too, but while many of NHS' hobbies are fine his failure to develop anything beyond that really is a problem—see also how he's totally sheltered during Sunshot, while pretty much every other major figure in the major clans was a major figure in the war. And while NMJ is certainly angry with him about it, and we see him express that anger, he also indulges NHS hugely and—okay I'm extrapolating some here but from what we do see it looks like the discipline is mostly anger-based, he lashes out and punishes NHS when he's angry and lets him off when he's amused or whatever, and that's really not a good way to teach someone! And then if you consider his relationship with JGY—part of the reason he swears brotherhood with JGY is his desire to guide him, but his efforts on this front are worse than useless, and he doesn't extend him any support at all.)

c) I also think it's interesting as a look at LXC in its own right, separate from what it says about his relationship with LWJ. In particular I think it's very telling that he instructs LWJ not to tell LQR who gave the bunnies to him, lest LQR make LWJ send them away! First, it certainly shows a strong trust in his own judgement; he knows LQR would not agree with him but he knows what he's doing. Secondly, I think it's really worth noting that he's proposing something at least adjacent to deceiving LQR: he's helping conceal information from LQR that LQR would absolutely think was relevant to his decision! Indeed, he's actively suggesting the concealment. And LQR is their uncle and teacher—and LXC isn't even sect leader at this point. Now I do think it matters that it's not the same thing as lying directly to LQR; they're just avoiding giving him certain information. That's not where everyone draws a line but I do think it's one of LXC's. And I think it all suggests he has a grasp of subtleties and of subtle distinctions even this early on in the timeline.

(Interestingly we see him use pretty much exactly the same tactic in much worse circumstances later on in the timeline; after LWJ and WWX escape from Carp Tower, and LXC returns, LQR has woken but LXC "told everyone not to tell him anything unnecessary" (64).)

(c ii. I'll also take a moment to be a xiyao and add, while I think JGY probably does ever lie to LXC about things, I'm pretty sure most of what he's done is simply not give LXC all the information. They really are very similar in a lot of ways!)

d) This is far from a perfect parallel but reflecting on LXC and JGY's similarities, I can't help but link this moment, with LXC backing LWJ up on the bunnies, with JGY giving JL Fairy. They're very different situations in a lot of ways, but they are both helping a beloved younger relative, with kindness and support, through animal companionship. There are a lot of differences too, of course; but I do think it speaks to some of the ways in which they're similar, which is more than people think.

#lan xichen

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mydaroga · 2 years

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Thoughts on ‘The Birth of the Beatles’

I watched this 1979 biopic originally early in my obsession (you know, lo five months ago or so) and it was interesting to look at it again having read and learned and thought a lot more. And I’ve been mulling it over the past few days, because it’s interesting.

I don’t love biopics of this nature, where it’s just “this event happened then this event and then this one.” You don’t actually learn anything you couldn’t get from a wiki entry, and it’s invariably far less accurate. This movie does not dispel that at all. It’s a pretty straightforward narrative of the newly-formed band going to Hamburg, coming back, meeting Brian, scoring their first hit. It skips over some stuff and gets some stuff wrong, of course. And most of the actors seem to have been chosen for a distinguishing feature that’s kinda like a feature the guy they’re playing has. (George, actually, looks the closest and is pretty dang cute.)

But aside from the general, there are some interesting aspects. Interesting given that it was made in the late seventies, it seems to be on the “John is the best” train, and quickly it becomes apparent that John is the lead character. By the end, it’s clear that this is The John Story. John is So Good, y’all. He is a good leader. And a good friend. And he even gives a very encouraging speech to Brian about how any love is good and you shouldn’t be ashamed of love in any form! It’s very nice. Except for how they do the “We’re going to the top!” bit but get it wrong, which is baffling.

Like many biopics of this nature, characters sort of drift in and out when necessary, so Cyn is a thing when it’s convenient, and just sort of pops up. Stu is there, and important, and he dies, but when he does John makes a heartfelt speech from the stage--they’ve already done the toilet seat madness bit earlier on. Mimi pops up at the end to be appalled by the scene in the hotel room as they’re finally about to make it, because Paul (of course) has a girl stripped down to her slip in there. I’m not exactly sure what is being foreshadowed here but it does feel portentious?

Speaking of Paul, while he’s a bit more marginal than I would have expected I do think this film does him a service by making him fucking weird and not at all a goody goody and there are some actually good bits with him being just as annoying as John. At one point he rides George like a pony with a mop in one hand in order to get John’s attention so he’ll cut class, which is all right with me. He is not my favorite Paul but his eyebrows are quite decent and for a side-man version of McCartney I will accept it.

But I think the absolute BEST thing about this film is the fact that Pete--yes, Pete Best--was the only actual band member who was consulted on the making of the film. Granted, that’s probably because none of the other guys wanted any part of this, but the result is stunning. Did you know? Pete Best taught Ringo everything he knows. Pete Best was the best drummer you’ve ever seen. Pete Best was only let go because he was just TOO POPULAR in Liverpool. The bias is truly glorious. There’s literally two scenes of Pete Best epic drum soloing, one of which prominently features Ringo watching avidly, soaking it all in.

All in all, this film is not actually instructive to true Beatles fans, especially in an age where we have more than one biography and the actual footage is available on Youtube. However, it’s a really interesting relic of an age where there really wasn’t that much out there: Compleat Beatles wasn’t out yet, and Anthology is ages away. Shout hadn’t even been published. John was still alive and really, things were fairly quiet in Beatledom. I was pretty dismissive upon first viewing, because I didn’t feel I learned anything I didn’t know. But on further reflection, I’ve realized that while it’s not actually a good movie, it does tell us something interesting about how the legend of this band was formulating, 9 years or so after its demise, and with considerably less information than we are now able to access just through a google search.

#beatles films #beatles biopics #birth of the beatles #i'm so glad i watched it again actually #because I was able to analyze it against my accumulated knowledge #and confirm Paul's weirdness #bless them #also i know i said it a lot but PETE BEST CONSULTED ON THIS FILM AND IT SHOWS LIEK WHOA #kris talks a lot

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13eyond13 · 2 years

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L 1,4,5,6,8,9,23,26,30

Sorry if it's too many lol

😅 no, but it's probs a good thing I also love L

L + LOVE: I'm not sure if he really loves anybody, nor feels genuinely loved by anybody else? The closest person in his life has got to be Watari, and that relationship seems quite business-like and transactional by nature much of the time. I think L pours himself into his work and feels mostly contented by that, but maybe that's also just somewhat because that is the only way he's ever lived or ever was encouraged to live growing up as well. I think he wouldn't see this in a particularly sorrowful or self-pitying way if he ever reflected on it and talked about it with others, though. He is a pretty pragmatic and proud and unsentimental guy, and I think for the most part he is genuinely content on his own being a hermit detective who solves interesting crimes.

L + FEARS: I think he would probably fear losing some of his intellectual prowess and his analytical mind, because he relies on that extremely heavily for a sense of power and dominance and reassurance and control. He lives firmly inside his own head 99% of the time and tries very hard to slot everything subjective into an objective context where he can determine exact truths. So I think if he were to have something happen to his brain – like getting sick or drugged or concussed or something that truly made him unable to trust or control his own senses and memories – that would be a pretty frightening experience for him.

L + CRYING: He probably can't remember the last time he's cried, or if he ever even has. But I think if he did cry then he would probably hate to cry in front of others, and would try to do it privately instead of in front of anybody else.

L + LAUGHTER: He never laughs out loud once in the manga, and I think he's an extremely dry-humoured person who normally wears a poker face whenever he is joking or being amused. I headcanon Light as being one of the only people who could ever actually make L laugh out loud (though probably not when he's actually attempting to crack a joke)

L + DREAMS: He would be the kind of person who normally finds other people's dreams extremely boring and pointless to listen to, and probably wouldn't hesitate to make that known

L + MUSIC: I think he likes going to live music events sometimes when he is not on the clock, which we actually did see shown by O&O in an extra one-shot about him

L + ROMANCE: He probably would not like conventional romantic gestures very much, and either try to bypass them altogether or be questioning why people do things the way they do them in the first place before actually partaking himself

L + BEAUTY: I think he is somebody who would both admire a good aesthetic sense in somebody else while also sort of resenting them for it and trying not to admit or appear like he admires or values it, because it's not something he would be able to effortlessly trounce them in if they were thrown into a competition over it of some kind

L + SEX: He probably had zero sex ed growing up, and had to teach himself everything he knows on the subject as an adult either by reading or by secretly watching stuff

[headcanon prompts]

#l lawliet #ask #anon #headcanon #p

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mediaevalmusereads · 11 months

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Hen Fever: A Sapphic Victorian Romance. By Olivia Waite. 2022.

Rating: 3.5/5 stars

Genre: historical romance, novella, lgbtqia+ literature

Summary: Lydia Wraxhall is on her best behavior every day of the year—except one: the annual Bickerton Christmas Poultry Show. On that day she brushes her birds, sharpens her tongue, and engages in the closest thing the village knows to war.

Harriet Boyne is a soldier’s widow reeling from the worst years of her life. She and her friends have inherited a manor on the village outskirts, and Harriet is looking forward to a quiet holiday far from the anguish of the battlefield.

But a dispute over a flock of loose chickens — a rare local breed, which Lydia thinks could be champions and Harriet thinks could be delicious — draws Harriet into the competition under Lydia’s grudging guidance. Harriet’s frozen heart is thawed by Lydia’s gentleness, and lonely Lydia blossoms under Harriet’s keen regard. But the day of the poultry show is fast approaching, and everyone’s drawing up battle lines. And in the contest between secret love and public glory, there can only be one winner.

***Full review below.***

Content Warnings: graphic sexual content

Overview: This book has been on my list for a few months, and since I haven't been in the mood for a full-length novel, I figured I'd pick it up. Overall, there were things about it that I liked and things that I wish had been a little different. While I enjoyed the homestead-y premise and the ways in which post-war trauma was treated (especially with the focus on women), I also think the romance could have been built up more effectively and the conflict could have been more substantial. Thus, this novella gets a 3.5 star rating from me.

Writing: Waite's prose is fairly clear and well-organized, effortlessly transitioning between telling and showing when appropriate. It feels very natural and flows well without feeling like it rushes or drags, and I think it's appropriate for both the scope and genre of the story.

Plot: The non-romance plot of this book follows Lydia Wraxhall, a known town spinster, as she strives to compete in the local poultry fair. Lydia has won the competition every year for the better part of a decade and aims to do so again. As she is deciding what kind of chicken to show, her prize rooster runs away. Lydia follows him into the woods and finds 6 hens of a breed thought to have been lost a decade ago. She also happens upon Harriet Boyne, the owner of the property, who wants to claim the chickens for herself. Lydia and Harriet strike a deal, but what they don't account for is their growing attraction to one another.

While I think this story started out well, competing interests in the chickens seemed to be brushed aside fairly quickly, and afterwards, it seemed to pose no obstacle at all to the love story. The dominant theme is thus not the poultry fair, but the PTSD and grief that the characters carry as a result of the war. I don't quite really have a complaint about this shift, as I thought that Waite portrayed them well. In fact, I appreciated the focus on how war affects women and people back home, rather than how it affects men. But I also think there was something of a disconnect between the dark tone of post-war trauma and the lighter tone of the poultry fair. Granted, Waite does try to weave them together towards the end, but I also think Waite could have made the two threads more strongly interconnected.

Characters: Lydia, one of our protagonists, is interesting in that she is a forty-something year old spinster who uses her skill in chicken farming to express herself. When the story begins, Lydia is grieving for the loss of her brother, Peter, who died during the war, and she chafes under the expectations of her parents, who treat Peter's death as a heroic sacrifice. I liked that a huge part of Lydia's arc involved reflecting on what she wanted out of life and confronting her fear of leaving her village. I also liked the bond she had with her brother and the way his loss was felt so keenly.

Harriet, our second protagonist, was also interesting in that she had post-war trauma, and seeing a female character with war trauma is somewhat rare, in my experience. I liked that Harriet's arc involved accepting that grief was a part of her life and that she had to learn to live anew. I also liked that she evolved from a closed-off, cold-hearted woman to someone who was willing to be vulnerable and accept love, even when it was scary.

Supporting characters were fine and appeared at appropriate times without dominating the narrative. I liked the group of war survivors that all lived together in the same house with Harriet; they felt like a found family, and I adored the way they supported one another through each other's grief. Peter, Lydia's brother, also felt like a full character, even though he is never present (because he has died); characters talk about him with fondness and often voice their feelings about how "heroic sacrifice" was worth less than having a flesh-and-blood brother and friend in their lives. The village couples at the end of the novella were a nice touch, mirroring the conflict at the beginning in the church.

Romance: The romance between Lydia and Harriet is both emotionally fulfilling and somewhat frustrating. On the one hand, I very much enjoyed that both protagonists were a little older, and I liked that their love was portrayed as a kind of healing force that sparked joy in both of their lives. However, I also wish that Waite had done more to build up a feeling of longing and that the conflict towards the end was less manufactured. As it stands, it feels like Lydia and Harriet bond over talking about the war and Lydia's dead brother, and while that's fine sometimes, I also wish Waite had shown more moments of emotional vulnerability and longing while they were preparing the chickens for show. When they finally get to the show, Waite then has Lydia say something careless which hurts Harriet, and to me, it didn't feel genuine, as Lydia isn't portrayed as thoughtless or careless with her speech elsewhere. Even if she wanted an excuse not to be "nice," it doesn't explain why she lashed out at Harriet. This conflict is also resolved fairly quickly, and while it might be just fine for some readers, I personally like my conflicts to be a bit more substantial.

TL;DR: Hen Fever is a tender sapphic romance featuring two heroines who are greatly affected by the war. While I wish the romance included more longing/yearning and I wish the conflict was a bit more substantive, the novella as a whole is a pleasant reflection on grief and finding one's place in a small community.

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