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#victim blaming them!!!!!
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Of the 19 hijackers who carried out the Sept 11 attacks:
15 were from Saudi Arabia (a powerful/oil-rich country the U.S. works hard to maintain diplomatic relations with)
2 were from the United Arab Emirates (also a powerful/oil-rich country the U.S. works hard to maintain diplomatic relations with)
1 was from Egypt, 1 from Lebanon.
None of the hijackers were from Iraq.
None of the Sept 11 hijackers were Iraqi.
None of the 9/11 hijackers were from Iraq.
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thebestestdancers · 6 months
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why should palestinians have to leave behind their land because israel wont stop killing them. why should anyone have to leave behind their life and memories and sentimental value just because an aggressor is left unchallenged. please think this sentiment through and delete it from your thoughts. instead of blaming an oppressed people for living in a hostile land, ask who is making that land hostile to live in.
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gay-otlc · 1 year
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Actually I think we should talk about how incredibly fucked up it is for sapphic women to say shit like "I'm no better than a straight man 😔" when attracted to a woman in a way that isn't 100% pure and wholesome, or act like men's attraction to women is inherently dirty, predatory, or objectifying.
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frizzdotbizz · 7 months
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feeling emo for the murder siblings
(don’t tag as ship/proshippers dni)
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lookstairs · 8 days
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I think one of the most realistic parts about Baby Reindeer (2024) is how much Donny downplays the abuse he faces
I know everyone wants to hate on him for being “stupid” and blame him for everything that happened because yes from an outsiders perspective he made questionable choices but isn’t that what HUNDREDS OF PEOPLE DO?
I know so many people who’ve “played nice” or tried to downplay abusive behavior. You try and tell yourself “It wasn’t that bad”, or that it was just some crazy experience that should be forgotten. It seems so much easier to stay silent and just try to move on.
You don’t wanna start problems
You don’t wanna be mean
You don’t wanna be the bad guy
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furiousgoldfish · 4 months
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If you've found yourself in that childhood hell with a narcissistic parent, where every year you gain you get treated worse, and the older you get, the more unworthy and unlovable you are, this is why it's going on.
Narcissists are unwilling to be parents, but they're ready to take advantage of every possible benefit they think parenthood has. The perceived benefit is how the world sees them, someone feeling sympathetic or engaged with them, getting popularity based on your kid's talents, abilities and successes, people having compassion for their 'parenthood struggles', and of course, the idea of unconditional love. For them, not for the kid. They also then go on and take extra stuff, like having their personal emotional caretaker, or a target for all of their anger, someone to feel superior to, someone they can violate, insult, touch, beat, and blend with, without any kind of consequences from the outside world. There's very few scenarios that would allow them such power over another person, and parenthood happens to be one of them.
So, why do they prefer small toddlers rather than grown-up children? Because toddlers gain them attention. They can go with a toddler in public, and have people gush and admire the cuteness. They can sometimes teach toddlers to do little dances or sing for the audience. They can do pretty much anything to small children, and children won't complain or understand what is going on. They can neglect their toddlers and nobody will know. They can punish small children for crying. They can convince small children that they exist only for to make the narcissist's life easier.
Once children start developing boundaries, start saying no, and no longer gather the attention of the crowd, that is where narcissists are no longer getting as many benefits from parenthood and start emotionally abandoning the child, and shaming the child for 'growing up' and 'not being as easy to control and manipulate'. And this is not how normally things work, you don't stop loving your kid when they're growing up, you don't value them according to how much attention you can get using them. Sometimes, if a kid has a special talent and is able to get them attention via child contests or tournaments, this kid will not be obviously immediately abandoned. But it will be clear to this child that the 'love' is completely dependent on how well they do and how far they succeed. The second they stop, they know that the parental love will be withdrawn and they'll be rendered a failure.
Narcissists will ask you to go not just out of your comfort zone in order to give them what they want, they will ask the downright impossible, and when you inevitably can't give it to them, you will be discarded, and possibly punished. You will degraded from 'special' and 'important because you can do this one thing for your parent', to nothing but a target for rage, forced to feel like you deserve it because you couldn't do what no child can - make a narcissist act like a normal parent. They convince children that they would be loving and thoughtful parents, if only the child was not so x, and y, and z, and the list is endless. Endless excuses not to love their child, because withdrawing that love will make the child absolutely desperate in their attempt to please the parent, and be good enough to deserve love.
This is not what would normally happen to a child. We're meant to be celebrated for growth. Our progress into adulthood should be about us, about what we can do now, how much new experiences and excitement it brings to have a bigger body, how much more capable and safer we are, what new skills we can develop, new games we can play, better connections and understanding with others we can now achieve. It's not supposed to be about whether we are of a benefit to someone, our growth is about us becoming a happy adult! Appropriating this entire process and reducing it to 'grovel endless to deserve love, and feel guilty for growing because you're of less use now' is absolute torture to a child, who doesn't understand that it's not meant to be this way, that they were never supposed to be a tool to use.
As we mature with the narcissist continually building this narrative of us not being good enough to deserve love, we end up having no other narrative, and believe that we're fundamentally, intrinsically lacking in something, and this makes us unlovable. It has nothing to do with the truth, and everything to do with a continuous lie that someone made up about us when we were still small, that we exist as a tool and a resource, and every hint of free will and desire and personal goals and boundaries is us failing to live up to that use. We were never meant to be exist for them, there was no achievable goal, us even trying to 'deserve their love' was nothing but a waste of our time and energy. We're not unlovable. We just don't a parent. We had someone leeching off of us, taking instead of giving, convincing us we don't deserve attention, care or resources, unlike them, who deserve to take it all.
For any normal parent, everything about you would have been good enough, you would have been a source of joy and celebration without ever even trying to deserve it. Nobody has to deserve parental love, it's either given by default, or there is nobody willing to be a parent to you. Being unwilling to parent you, they have no right to expect anything from you. You did not break the parent-child bond, because there never was such a thing in the first place, they betrayed you from the start.
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msfbgraves · 8 months
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Seeing a lot of: "The selfish strikers are hurting the crew members 😥😫😭" takes on Tumblr suddenly.
Well hello AMPTP PR team!
If the retraction of your labor did not hurt anyone, strikes would be absolutely useless. An industry is supposed to suffer from a retraction of labor, to show the value of that labor. And that is exactly why nobody ever starts a negotiation there. Every negotiation goes: "I offer something against fair compensation. When not fairly compensated, I will retract my labor, with us both knowing full well that people are going to suffer. So let's not. Pay me fairly for all our benefits. You reap huge rewards from this labor. That comes with the responsibility of good stewardship." If they say: "Nope, I am unwilling to compensate you fairly," the "and I don't care who the hell suffers for it" goes without saying.
That suffering is supposed to be a pressure on the bosses, as their refusal to pay fairly is what causes it. What they're now doing is saying the strikers cause it, as if that action wasn't a response to them not taking responsibility.
Do you honestly think that the same people who want to squeeze writers and actors care a single fuck for the wellbeing of the crew?! The AMPTP is causing that pain and could end it with a 10th of what WB alone has already lost in revenue. But no they want to alleviate the pressure of the collatoral damage of their refusal by scabbing (lessening the pain for their consumers), and setting the workers against each other. Oh, it's not my fault for screwing my workers over, which hurts you! It's their fault for not letting me do it without a fight! They're so mean!
When this could all be resolved - already is being resolved! - by simply giving in to very reasonable demands! People, including crew, who have made agreements with the unions are in fact working!
Say some footballer was harassing someone and got kicked back so hard they couldn't play. If the game is cancelled because of that, do you say: well, they should have just let themselves be hurt so I don't suffer? Or do you say: that asshole footballer is letting us all down by not taking responsibility that comes with their position and being an awful person? Even a toddler knows who is at fault in that situation. But if I have to spell it out: it's the person that starts being awful when it is in their power not to be, and when in fact they had every chance not to be. It's the footballer kicking someone for no reason. It is the AMPTP who wants to exploit and underpay people and screw over consumers by only giving them AI crap, which was trained on stolen work, the copyright of which they don't own and never offered to pay for.
People suffer because the AMPTP won't agree not to hurt people. This stops - and has already stopped in some cases - the second they agree to a reasonable deal with inbuilt protections.
The AMPTP knew in rejecting these terms that they would throw the crew under the bus. They didn't give a shit as long as they could retain the power to exploit people.
I bet they are paying the PR people more than they're refusing to pay the unions to not have to come to an agreement, knowing full well how much that is costing not just the crew but the entire economy of California.
If I were a Californian representative, I would call Zaslav, Iger and Lombardini and pressure them to stop fucking over the entire state!
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knightsgaydiant · 10 months
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me: it’s great that shallan has hoid in her life, he’s like the older brother she never had
shallan’s four actual older brothers: exCUSE me????
me: y’all don’t count
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disniq · 1 year
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The thing is, I actually think it's a super interesting angle to look at the intersection of trauma and mental illness and vigilantism and coping mechanisms with Jason's character.
But, for me, if you want to seriously ask at what point does Jason need therapy more than he needs the vigilante lifestyle it's not Red Hood Jason you should be looking at. Red Hood Jason was literally murdered and the mysteriously resurrected. That's not something you can therapy your way out of! That's something that no amount of talking will ever help you understand, because it's a completely incomprehensible event!
No, if anyone needs therapy it's 12 year old Jason.
It's 12 year old Jason, who has poverty trauma and homelessness trauma and prison system trauma and parentification trauma and drug related trauma and, depending on your reading, potentially sexual trauma.
It's 12 year old Jason, who is taken in by Bruce - a man who is *also* severely traumatised (in extremely different ways) and chooses to dress up as a Bat and punch people about it instead of seeking healthy coping strategies.
It's 12 year old Jason, who Bruce decides - without psychiatric training or so much as a second opinion - needs the same outlet that "helped" Bruce and "helped" Dick.
And by the time aditf rolls around, Bruce is maybe just realising that he's made a mistake. But it's too late, because for two years he's told this child - a child who arguably feels indebted to him, a child who is extremely isolated and had very few if any other trusted adults to talk to - that violence and avoidance is how you deal with emotions.
I think that's fascinating to think about!
That Bruce's own failure to process his trauma left him blind to what Jason might actually have benefited from! That if Bruce had noticed Jason struggling earlier, if he'd reacted differently or explained himself better in aditf, Jason might not have felt the need to travel around the world alone looking for a woman he'd never met and only just learned about!
That if *Bruce* had been healthier, had been to therapy instead of throwing all his energy into vigilantism, none of this might have happened!
Reframe Red Hood Jason as a tragedy of Bruce's own making, not because of the classist bullshit that Jason was always going to end up a criminal and Bruce failed to stop that, but because Bruce's terrible coping mechanisms became *Jason's* terrible coping mechanisms and nobody likes to see the worst parts of themselves in the mirror.
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mikakuna · 2 months
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my problem is that i always end up emotionally invested in the angry abuse victim character-- the character who is always the "wrong" kind of victim. the one who lashes out and is violent, a complete juxtaposition to their sunshine/lawful good counterparts in the media.
i end up resonating too hard with these characters that i always end up on the shitty side of the fandom where people will see you as a bad person for enjoying representation of an angry victim.
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suncaptor · 3 months
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Kripke was so insane for Swan Song for real. Like I don't mean it in some perfect spn finale way I don't think it was the best place to end the show. But the Sam & Lucifer in the episode? The way it ties together Sam's entire life of being groomed and Lucifer fighting him in his head now? The cosmic stakes of Sam overcoming what actually is a battle in his mind???? Insane.
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fabaceous · 1 year
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exactly one (1) person asked for my thoughts on jackie’s pov of jackieshauna so me being me i obviously wrote an even longer essay than my shauna essay. so. here you go anon, SORRY or you’re welcome.
we can all agree that if you boil jackie down (um... sorry, too on the nose?) to her bare essentials, what you’re left with is basically a huge pit of insecurity. shauna is incapable of facing other people, but jackie is incapable of facing herself. jackie is incredibly inwardly/emotionally unstable but she doesn’t actually realize it because she does such a good job of distracting herself by curating her environment, her image, the people she’s surrounded by, their image, her hobbies, and on and on and on. she (without fully understanding that this is what she’s doing) tries to impose order on her outer world in the hopes that that will, by extension, bring order to her inner world.
so, here is my thesis statement: i propose that shauna is both jackie’s biggest source of stability AND her biggest source of instability.
shauna is the only one who’s always been there for her. it’s so telling that out of all the things jackie could’ve complimented shauna on in that scene (her intellect? her depth as a person? her looks?) she chose this. it shows us what jackie’s priorities are and why she values shauna: shauna is her rock, her best friend and trusty sidekick, she’s steady and loyal.
thing is, shauna isn’t. while shauna saintifies jackie after death and turns her into an  idea/symbol, jackie kinda does the same to shauna in life. she needs shauna to be her rock, and she needs it SO badly, like survival-level badly, that she just can’t leave space for shauna to be anything else. this sucks for shauna, because she doesn’t feel like jackie truly sees her in all her complexity. but it also sucks for jackie, because she just doesn’t realize when things are going downhill - and she doesn’t realize that her search for stability in shauna has been doomed to fail from the get-go, because shauna has a mind of her own.  
and this is when shauna becomes jackie’s biggest source of INstability: when she goes rogue. or, maybe more accurately, when she does what jackie interprets as “going rogue” - aka going against jackie’s carefully laid-out plans, whether or not she truly meant it as a snub. exhibit a: voting to go to the lake instead of stay at the crash site. for a healthy, secure person/relationship this would’ve been a simple difference of opinion. but for jackieshauna it drove a wedge between them for an entire day or possibly more, because by defying jackie, shauna destabilizes jackie’s very, VERY tenuous grip on the TINY amount of control she feels like she has over her world.
this control is EVERYTHING to jackie because it’s the only thing that can alleviate her internal turbulence. and she is DESPERATE for her fix, so she reaches, grasps, searches for the stability that she needs, that she only knows how to find in shauna, and it always seems to be just out of her reach, and of course we know it’s impossible to find internal stability through external things, but jackie thinks if she just stretches a little further and holds on a little tighter, she’ll get what she needs, so she clings onto shauna more and more desperately, not realizing that squeezing so tight could have unwanted side effects.
and just like with shauna - there IS genuine love here! but as much as shauna has warped ideas about what love looks like (and boy does she!), jackie has some messed up ideas about love too! jackie adores shauna, but part of that adoration is tied to how jackie builds shauna up in her own head, and when shauna fails to live up to the role that jackie needs her to play, it sends jackie into a tailspin and she lashes out. and i think jackie thinks that because she loves shauna, she can’t possibly be hurting her. it’s not a cage if i make it cozy, right? if i put some blankets down and keep her nice and safe? she’s not trapped, i’m taking good care of her, she’s choosing to stay, and if she wanted differently, she’d say so. (but shauna can’t/won’t say so, as we know.)
so. to sum it up. on a good day, shauna keeps jackie afloat, but on a bad day, shauna sends jackie spiraling. jackie needs her so desperately and the tragedy is that she loves shauna so much and she’s so terrified of losing her that she does everything she can to prevent it, but her desperation blinds her to the fact that, by holding onto shauna so tightly, she’s contributing to the very situation she hoped to avoid: shauna leaving her.
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uselessnbee · 5 months
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what i wish people would also explore more when it comes to Percy is the other side of his feelings about his mom about family and his childhood but this fandom is too afraid to paint Sally even in the slightest bad light (even if it's not bad just acknowledging her flaws because she's a human being and not perfect) that no one will touch on that subject. like yes Sally is the best mom but she also isn't and that's the thing! She isn't perfect! but she tried her best but her best still got Percy hurt and it isn't her fault at all but that's the tragedy of it. i want Percy's feelings about this explored. how he grew up with a loving mom but an abusive step father. how his step father would humiliate him and call him stupid but then his mom soothed him and told him he's not the things Gabe calls him. how Gabe would hurt him and Sally would be there to make him happy and loved but at the same time she stayed with him. i want Percy's feelings explored about how he knows his mother loves him but her absence still hurt him. she would work so much to have money to raise him she did that for him but at the same time it meant Percy was left alone or with Gabe. Sally gave up so much for him, she sent him away to protect him but at the same time he was sent away from his mom. she's the only parent he has because his father is absent and Gabe is not actually a parental figure at all but she's also often absent in his life too and that must have left him with such mixed feelings because it's not all black and white! Sally's love protected him but also hurt him. Percy loves his mom so so so much but there's also this deep-seated bitterness and hurt and anger he never let himself feel and then the guilt for having those feelings because his mom loves him he knows that and she gave up so much for him and she married a monster that abused her to protect him, he knows that but it doesn't make it hurt any less. the mess his emotions are because he knows his mom suffered for him and did it from her love for him but he still desperately wishes she never married that monster that he wouldn't have to have the childhood he had with him that he wouldn't have to live with the trauma he was left with. this all is exactly what makes their relationship so fascinating and also heartbreaking.
or the idea of Percy having weird mixed feelings after Estelle is born because that's his little sister and he loves her with his whole heart and would do anything for her and wants only the best for her but there's also this little jealous monster deep down that wonders why she gets to have a loving mom and a loving dad and a happy normal life but he never got that. why does she deserve it but not him? why couldn't he have that too? doesn't he deserve that too? he was just a child too so why why why??? and then the guilt of feeling that way too it makes me want to scream. emotions are fucking messy and they can be really ugly and they can make you hate yourself and there's no way Percy's feelings aren't a mess when it comes to this and i want to see it explored so badly!
and with Sally too! her feelings about Percy because she did so much and tried her best but sometimes unfortunately your best isn't good enough and it still got her beloved son hurt and she hates it and feels so guilty but she just has to live with that but she can't help to wish it was different. that their lives would be different. better. normal. she can't help but to wish she didn't have to do the things she's done, didn't have to suffer so much just to protect her child. can't help to wish she didn't have to worry so much, didn't have to be so scared about Percy, didn't have to be terrified that one day he won't come back home to her, that she won't be able to hold her son anymore because he will be gone, she just wishes he didn't have to suffer so much, she just wishes and wishes and wishes
and i just wish people weren't so afraid to explore this because it's so heartwrenching and yes if you want something do it yourself but unfortunately i cannot write nor am i able to handle this topic in a way it deserves so i am left only with rambling about it on here thank you
#i am not trying to victim blame or anything i love Sally and she did her best and didn't deserve any of the crap life gave her#but there's just something so tragic about the fact that she married a vile man and suffered abuse to protect her son#just for her decision to hurt him anyways just in a different way but the only other option would probably be Percy ending up dead#so she can't really truly regret it but she just wishes those weren't their only options#that she didn't have to do this just so that her child could stay alive#thinking about it makes me go feral#they had no choice but to suffer there was no way for their lives to be without this much hurt and trauma and it's terrible#and they didn't deserve it but there was so much love too#but the horrible thing is that that love just wasn't enough to save them from all that pain and i need to be sedated bye#percy jackson#sally jackson#pjo#hoo#percy and sally#percy jackon and the olympians#whatever you do don't think about a six years old lonely Percy sitting in a corner waiting for his mom to come back home from work#and he knows she loves him but he misses her so much when she spends so much time in work and that hurts#don't think about a ten years old Percy being sent away to a boarding school and he knows his mom loves him#but what if she's sending him away because he's just too much? or not enough? and what if she doesn't want him anymore?#and he knows that's not true but what if?#i'm thinking it#okay i think that's enough
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butwhatifidothis · 4 months
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It really is strange how Edelstans simultaneously dig hard into people that don't agree with their specific interpretation of 3H to the point of being happy they manage to drive those people away... and be so upset and baffled that people become generally disinterested/actively hostile towards 3H content.
If folks get repeatedly driven out of a fandom, and that group of people repeatedly calls anyone who disagrees with their specific interpretation of 3H stupid/illiterate/"acting in bad faith"/sexist/racist/homophobic/etc., and it is repeatedly done by a group of people who insist that 3H's fandom problem is a "both sides" thing, with all of this being dragged into spaces that have nothing to do with 3H, well... obviously people are then going to start to dislike interacting with either 3H in general or its fandom in particular?
Edelstans are the ones spreading the idea that 3H's fandom in totality is shit. They keep trying to make their hands look cleaner than they are by claiming that everyone else's hands are just dirty as/even dirtier than theirs. Of course people who are unaware of everything are going to then assume that everyone's hands are dirty, thus making people not exactly want to shake hands with anyone.
Like, really now. What did they think was going to happen when they directly go after fanartists/fanfic writers who create/say things that go against the Approved Edelstan Status Quo, to the point that a non-zero amount of these creators just up and leave social media entirely? Or after they nitpick every single Disapproved Post and then lie about the post's OP? Or after it becomes a consistent pattern that people who even remotely disagree with Edelstans' opinions are always, without fail, buried with insulting and harassing anons? Or after they're shown time and time again to defend their worst actors with "well their/our victims deserved it because they said a 3H opinion we didn't agree with"? Or when they say that everyone does this shit in 3H's fandom except for them (which is either not believed because it's demonstrably untrue or is actually believed and now those people think the overwhelming majority of 3H's fandom is filled with shit)? Or when they drag 3H discourse into literally actually everything no matter how unrelated?
That with less fandom creators within the fandom space they'd get more content? That harassing and insulting people and accusing them of being this-and-that bigot is going to magically "correct" their minds into seeing The One Truth about 3H? That people are going to just look over all the shit they did just because they allocate the blame of their action on all of 3H's fandom? That people would like 3H more if they constantly remind people of the inarguable worst thing to come from 3H? That this would help 3H's general perception?
Fuckin' no, of course that's just going to make everyone fuck off from 3H. And would you look at that, a shit ton of people have fucked off from 3H since everything has been swept under a "well it'sth a bolth thides ithue tho what can ya do?" rug. And it's been swept under that rug by pretty much the only people who are pulling this shit, who then get shocked - utterly gobsmacked! - that that made them look bad too. That crying "both sides!" included themselves too and not just the people they've been harassing. That saying that the entire fandom is bad everywhere made the entire fandom look bad everywhere.
If Edelstans are really so upset that no one talks about 3H positively anymore, then maybe they should stop being the reason no one likes 3H anymore. Just a thought
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uncanny-tranny · 7 months
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It is okay if you can never forgive somebody who has harmed or abused you. You don't have to forgive them, but you deserve to find peace in other ways. If you can't forgive or forget, then do things for your sake. Find what fulfills you, if to make it easier for yourself. That is okay. Forgiveness isn't forgiveness if it is demanded or expected, and it isn't fair for you
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furiousgoldfish · 19 days
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Abusive parents will go 'Oh yeah? Well I had it worse! My parents were bad!' and it's like, Oh? We can acknowledge that your parents were bad? You can say that? You can say they treated you very badly? You know this and are aware of this?
And yet, when raising your own child, you used their methods and decided that you are the victim here? That it's okay because they've done it 'worse'? You're comfortable telling your children that they're paying for however you've been treated, and that you specifically had your children to expose them to all of the bad things that happened to you? The world feels fair to you if your own children are suffering? That's where you take your power?
Your parents were bad and you know this, so you went ahead and became a bad parent on purpose, and you're thinking you're the victim in all this?
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