We got a new manager at work and like she seems fine, personality wise. But I spent all day trying to explain stuff and getting interrupted half way through with how we were now going to do X thing the way she wants to do it and every time I was like... Can you at least finish your training shifts before you implement changes to how this whole thing has worked since I got here? Just rubbed me the wrong way professionally because like I get she was a manager of the same department as mine at another store, but please learn how this store works and then do whatever, thank you ☠️☠️☠️

GOJO SATORU || pain in the ass

request: gojo and reader are special grades and their parents want them to get married so they could make a strong generation for their family (she doesnt like this and she thinks it's stupid). in the first meeting, they went together to exorcise some curses in mountain (their family asked them to do it together so they can get along), she ignored him bc she thinks he is kind of asshole but gojo keeps teasing her (he thinks her reaction is cute and she looks hot and actually he likes her and thinks getting married with her doesnt sound so bad).

could you make it jsjjdks i keep imagining this in my head and i think it's cute if the reader started to catch feelings too...... btw your writings are amazing i really love them and thank you!!

note: AHAHAHA I LOVE THIS! I am so happy most of us agree that Gojo, as hot as he is, can be an asshole. But this one is v fluffy, and very cute! I tried to cut down on not making it too long cause not going to lie, I always love reading tropes like this! the “annoying-ass-to-kinda-cute’” sort of trope, and I love it cx but here you go babes! I definitely enjoyed writing something like this.

pronouns: she/her

“Y/N, guess what?”

Y/N’s chopsticks came to a stop as she closes her eyes, taking a deep breath to brace herself before slowly bringing her eyes away from the meal before them; meeting her mother’s eyes head on. “What is it, Mother?” She asks the older woman hesitantly, unsure of how to respond when she saw the familiar glint in her eyes - immediately telling her that she was not going to like where the conversation was heading. “Remember how we talked about being in the main family? How, as the oldest child, you need to set an example for your siblings?”

“..yes?” Y/N’s voice was uncertain, which made her mother frown but she didn’t comment any further on it. “Well, your father and I met up with a family recently, who has a son around your age.” The older woman said just as an annoyed sigh was heard, the woman narrowing her eyes at her daughter who sets her chopsticks down quite loudly. “Mother, how many times have I told you that I don’t like this whole arranged marriage scheme you and Father have come up with.”

Before her mother can give her a response, her husband reaches over to grab her hand in his, giving her a soft look before he clears his throat loudly. “Everyone, would you give us a moment?” He asked as he glances over at the rest of his kids, who all gave their oldest sister a concerned glance before they started to make their way out of the room; their mother closing the door after them. Not without giving her husband another look, one that Y/N caught and had her blood boil a little in annoyance.

Once the shoji doors of the dining room were slid shut the older man lets out a soft sigh before he made his way towards his oldest, taking up the zabuton that his son had left empty by her side. Quietly he reaches out to take her hand in his, his rougher hands incasing her own ones that were roughen up by years of combat training; but there was still a certain softness and feminine touch to them. “Princess - you know your mother and I just want to look out for you.” He started off with a tired sigh, to which the younger woman just gave her father a look. “I know you don’t see marriage as a viable route. But you have to remember, not only are you a Special Grade sorcerer, you also come from a strong clan like ours.”

“Yes, yes, I know - but what does my marriage status have to do with this?” Y/N stresses with a frown as she looks over at her father once more. “You and I both know that the elders can be very old schooled. I mean - who still insist on marrying every of age person of as soon as possible?” She ranted with pure annoyance lacing her voice, the older man just listening to her complains with a soft smile. He can’t get upset at her - he himself went on a rant when he was first told of his own engagement during his teen years. “I know it’s sudden and against your wish, but can you entertain your old man once? One meeting, that is all I ask of you.”

At first his words was met with silence, but he just waited for her to slowly but surely give in. Which she did after a few more moments. “...just once.” She said with a tired sigh, causing the older man to chuckle before he leans over to kiss her on the head softly. “But if I don’t like him, I am never going to let you forget about this.” She stated simply as she looks over at her elderly father, who just smiles softly in return. “I am sure you’re going to enjoy his presence. He’s of your age, and a Special Grade sorcerer too. I am sure you two are going to get along just fine.”

“I am going to murder his dumbass.”

To say Y/N was upset would be an understatement - there were clear waves of annoyance just radiating off the sorcerer. Today was the day she was supposed to meet with her ‘fiancé’ for the first time, and he was not giving her the best first impression. Not only is he half an hour late, he didn’t send anyone to give her a heads up either. So now she was just standing there, tapping her foot impatiently as she glanced at her watch once more. 

They were supposed to meet at the gates of a mountain temple to exorcise some curses that had started to appear around the temple. Hence why she stood by a traditional torii gate, her mood souring with each passing second. She glanced over at the monks who care for the temple and bow at them apologetically, to which they just gave her reassuring smiles and bow back softly as well. “I do apologies for my companion. Seems he still lacks the ability to read a clock.”

“How rude. And here I thought that you’d be excited to meet your future fiancé.” A teasing voice came from behind her, causing her to turn her narrowed eyes back to finally get a look at her fiancé - only to have her eyes widen when she realised just how tall the man was. She gave him a once over, noting his handsome features and white haired style upwards; and how his eyes were covered by a blindfold. He sported a soft grin which he thought might have tell her how apologetic he was, but it just causes her to get more irritated. “I do apologise for making you wait. I had a run in with some pesky curses along the way.”

For some reason Y/N did not believe his words, but she just rolled her eyes before she turned and made her way towards the torii gate, walking on the side like she was taught to do. Quietly she started to climb the stone steps up to the temple, not even caring if the man was following behind her. But she can tell from the footsteps that followed behind her, and soon he opened his mouth once more. “What? No introduction?”

“L/N Y/N.” She stated simply, her hand resting on the beautifully carved katana that rest on her hip as she started to glance about the wooded area; trying to see if she can sense any Curses near by. “Nice to meet you, Y/N-chan. My name is Goto Satoru.” The white haired shaman greeted back with a grin, to which the woman just lets out a soft hum, not necessarily paying attention to what he had just said. But Goto wasn’t deterred, walking a few steps behind her as he watches her walk before him. “You’re the oldest heir of the L/N clan?” 

“Unfortunately.” The woman replied back in annoyance, to which the taller male raises an eyebrow at her response. He can tell that in that sense, they can definitely relate - they were both heirs to clans who are so backwards thinking that they think that they need to find ‘the best matches’ for all of their available heirs. 

If he was being honest, Gojo had no intention of coming to arrange meeting. He wanted to blow it off with some lame excuse, or just flip off his elders when they ask. But something told him that he should just come for the sake of seeing which miserable soul was forced into the same position he was in. And if he was being honest, he doesn’t regret coming to the meeting that much anymore. “By the way, do you consider this to be our first date?”

“If it is, I can definitely say my low standards for the day just reached the floor.” She grumbled before she paused just underneath another torii gate, looking up at the Curse that was wrapped around one of the sides like a giant snake; hissing at them loudly. “How rude.” Gojo replied back with a pout, standing back and watching the woman unsheathes her katana, how she imbed her own Cursed Energy onto the blade; raising a curious brow at just how strong her Cursed Energy was.

Weirdly enough, he finds her not only interesting, but extremely hot. Who wouldn’t find a strong woman hot?

He watches her in silence as she sliced the air before her, the Curse letting out a loud cry of main as it was sliced up into pieces by invisible blades. But the woman didn’t cast the withering Curse another glance as she pushes forward. “Come on, let’s get this over with.” She sighs as she rest her katana over her shoulder, looking back at the man with an unamused look. Gojo instead grins before he follows behind the woman now getting more interested than he was before. “You know, I think you and I are going to get along well.”

“What a pain in the ass.” Was her only answer, causing his grin to widen as he hums to himself whilst following behind the clearly fuming woman. Yeah, he definitely doesn’t regret his decision to come now.

It wasn’t the first time the both of them were forced to cross paths with one another.

With all that said and done, both Gojo and Y/N were definitely quite the duo. Both of them are Special Grades, and both of them work together almost flawlessly. Even though Gojo is considered ‘the strongest’, Y/N is the more polished and definitely more refined sorcerer; since she had taken her early training. Because of this they balance each other out quite nicely, making them quite the formidable duo. Due to this, they are scent to many missions together, forcing them to spend a lot of time with each other.

Y/N’s first impression on Gojo is that he doesn’t necessarily care about anyone or anything. Yet Y/N can tell that he cares for all of his students with his entire being, and is always willing to go the extra mile to make sure that they get to experience their youth to the fullest extent. Besides that, he’s also someone who can try and make light no matter the situation. Even Y/N can admit that his snarky comments and sarcastic responses has made her let out a laugh or two.

It wasn’t just that - it was also how, even though they were forced into a union together unwillingly, he tries to make the most out of it. Not only does he show her around Tokyo, since she’s from a town in Kyoto Province - he also made it his own mission to show her all the fun restaurants and dessert cafes all over the city that he himself visits. He also goes out of his way to make sure that her elders are not bothering her too much about when the wedding is going to be. Gojo can tell that Y/N’s elders are pushing for this more than his are, so he did visit her clan’s home a few times to make sure that they weren’t pressuring her about marriage.

Along the way he has met her parents and her siblings, somehow managing to fit into her family unit in a short about of time. Whether it’s playing video games with her younger sister, or rough housing with her younger brother, even bonding with your parents over tea - there was no denying that he somehow manages to get along with everyone. It did make her heart flutter a little, since finding a man who is not only an ease to be around, but also makes the effort to get to know your parents is a rare gem to find. 

On days when they are both free, he would appear and drag her out of her home, begging for her to bring him around her hometown and to the Kyoto School for a visit. For the most part though, he just goes to the Kyoto branch so he can annoy  Utahime, who will turn to you with the most annoyed scowl on her face. “Out of all the men on this planet, you had to choose the white haired menace?” The woman would ask her junior with an unamused scowl, to which Y/N would just apologise wordlessly with a soft one of her own.

If she was being honest, she had no idea that the man she once found annoying become attractive; and was definitely not even sure when she started to fall for him. But she remembers the day when she realised that there was definitely something more she felt for him - it was family game night. Gojo, who had visited Kyoto to handle something, had dropped by with some takeout to share with your family. After a nice dinner, which was filled with laughter, Y/N sat down on the engawa of her family home; smiling softly at the sight of Gojo playing with her younger siblings.

Just the sight of the three of them bonding together, laughing and running around the courtyard that cause a warm feeling to travel through her entire person; a wider and much more sincere smile tugging against her lips. It was when a pair of crystalline blue eyes that seemed to almost glow in the night turn to face her, half hidden behind darkly tinted sunglasses as the owner grinned over at her with such child like happiness that it hit her like a truck.

“Holy shit, I’ve fallen for him.” She whispered quietly to herself as she continues to watch the oblivious trio before her, her cheeks warming the longer she watches him laugh and play with her siblings. If her past her sees her now, she might not be too proud at how they had decided to go against her number one rule - and that was not to fall for the man. 

Now she is never going to hear the end of this any time soon.

© roscgcld — all rights reserved to me, rose, the author and creator of these works. do not repost/translate/claim my work as yours on any platform

Future Hope - chapter 1.5 - Practice Makes Perfect

Our heroes didnt get their powers and knew from night to day how to manage them, especially those who had physical changes to their body. Our soon-to-be heroes were all reunited in Maria's house, they had planed to spend the afternoon practing and exploring their new limits and abilities, all helping eitch other.

They decided since Griff had the biggest change, they would focus on him first. At the moment they were out in backyard, eitch one giving suggestions on what to begin first.

"Pick us all up at once with your new muscles!" Said Muffin excitedly. "That's still too light! Pick us all up plus Maria's car" Said Spike, chewing once again on a bubblegum.

"You all leave Hellride out of this!" Maria responded angrily. "That car was expensive as fuck and I refuse to go back to a life of Ubers!" She crossed her arms, indignified.

"You named your car?" Kip answered from high up a tree branch, as cats do. "I name all my belongings, what of it?" Maria answered. "And they're all cool names, too".

"Hellride? Really?" Spiked scoffed. "Because she rides fast as Hell! Look can we get back on track and find something for Griff to test his strenght?!" Maria answered nervously with a touch of embarrassment.

"Unless we find an Indiana Jones boulder for him to spin on his finger like a damn basketball we arent gonna get any damn progress!" Spike shouted back.

Maria sighed and shook her head. "I hate it when you have a point.." Griff nervously scratched the back of his head. "There must be something we can do.." He quietly mumbled out.

"I got it!" Muffin shouted, they all turned to face her. "I forgot Im a fairy! I can just poof something up!" She said excitedly. Everyone stared at her with either a confused or shocked look.

"..How... Do you FORGET that you're a fairy?!" Spike blurted out nervously. "You have fucking wings! How does one forget they have huge pink glittery wings?!"

Muffin just shrugged.

Maria smiled wide. "OK Muffin, give us something huge and heavy for Griff to use!" Muffin nodded and grabbed her wand which had a muffin on the tip. "Wand cook, beat and bake! Give us a big large and tasty cupcake!" She waved her wand and out appeared from a bunch of pink glittery smoke, a nearly two-story house tall chocolate cupcake.

"... Why a cupcake..?" Blink asked as she peeked behind her mask, in slight awe and wanting to secretly a bite out of it. "I can only make sweets!" Muffin said with a shy tone. "Im not a fighter like you guys, I only want to make people happy and eat candy!"

"That is certainly the biggest pastry I've ever seen! So large and beautiful, I bet tasty as well!" "Not to mention DIABETIC AS HELL!!! We could die from a heart attack eating that! Or worse, we could get fat! Even fatter! And become even uglier then we already are! This is too overwealming I need a nap!"

Rooko and Rooki suddenly spoke, almost taking everyone off guard on how their friend Rook is suddenly two split personalities now based on the Youtube character ENA, one is always happy while the other is always sad, and depending on the situation they can go Manic or Miserable.

"OK Griff, show us what you can do!" Maria shouted excitedly. Without missing a second, Griff bent over and gripped the edge of the massive cupcake, after struggling a bit he slowly but surely, lifted the entire thing over his head, smiling proudly.

His friends cheered and applauded proudly. Feeling satisfied, he dropped the cupcake and dusted the chocolate crumbs off his hands and fur. "Yokusei!" He shouted, and with a naruto-like smoke poof, he turned back to his human self. Maria ran and hugged him tightly, which Griff embraced and hugged back with a slight twirl.

"Griff you were amazing!!" Maria said with a proud tone, Griff slightly blushed pink at the small punk girl and her excitement. "Oh shucks, it was nothing.." He said with a shy tone.

"Well, and seems we concluded Griffin's training." Togekiss said as they took a sip of tea. "He jump twice as high as a two-story house, his punches and kicks can knock down brick walls and possibly more if we werent limited on objects to test it with, he can hear twice as much then a dog could with his ears, and his sense of smell is impecable. Truly Griff is a strong asset to our team."

"I can only train my powers at night.." Said Spooks, holding an umbrella to protect her from the sun, now that it injures her. "Muffin's power is only sweet making. Togekiss has exceptional I.Q and can see simulations in the future like Garnet in Steven Universe, along with their strong telekenisis, and Kip simply draws whatever she desires, whether alive or not and it becomes a reality... That means it's Rook's turn to show us what she can do" She finished.

"Wonderful! It's our time to shine!" "I-I-I not ready! Everyone's gonna laugh at us! I-I might piss myself in fear!" "Oh pull yourself together dear! Our friends wont laugh at us!" "How do we know that?! They're just waiting to correct us on a dumb mistake!!!"

Rook's body shook and twitched as her eyes turned to static, suddenly her entire eyes turned black with a blue iris, she turned Miserable.

"They're gonna laugh and point at our foolish selves, we're gonna be so embarrassed that we'll wish that the Earth will swallow us whole and just fucking kill us now!! Go ahead! Laugh at us and our misfortune!!!"

"ooh shit" Maria said. "can someone calm her down?"

Rook's eyes change to regular as her Miserable side went away. "No need my good Queen! We are completly fine! Now prepare to be dazzled as we show you all what we can do!" q

Rook pulled out a harry potter-like wooden wand, waved it around. "Bloom and Blossom and protect who I love! Rise my pretties, rise high and above!" Rooki shot an orange light at the grass, which made dozens of flowers bloom and grow around Spike and Blink.

"This is only one of my tricks! It's a shield that protects them from almost anything! My main weakness is fire, because while plants are beautiful, they are also sadly very, very flammable"

"Cool." Said Spike before using his bat to aggressivly hit the flowers and the vines aside so he and Blink could leave.

"M-M-My turn I guess!" Rook took hold of the wand and waved it in circles. "Razzle Dazzle Shine and Show, make their body move it low!" Rooko shot a blue light at Spooks, which made unwillingly and uncontrolably start dancing and as the spell said, make her go low.

"O-OH GOD SOMEONE MAKE IT STOP I DONT LIKE HOW MY BUTT IS MOVING THIS MUCH!!" She shouted in desperation as she made a split and moved it even lower.

"M-My deal is with music! I-It works as a way of distraction o-or hypnosis and it lasts for 30 minutes un-le-less I say otherwise! I-I know it's a sucky power!"

"OK COOL CAN I STOP DANCING PLEASE IM GETTING A CRAMP!!!" Yelled Spooks, practically begging. Rooko flicked her wand and Spooks fell on the ground, panting. "OH MY POOR HAMSTRINGS THEY ACHE!!" She yelled in utter pain, meanwhile Maria and Spike were absolutely losing it.

"O-OH GOD MY STOMACH HURTS-" Said Spike in between laughter.

"OK you guys cool it" Said Blink. "It's our turn to practice now. We're the only ones who use regular weapons." She said drawing her sword and positioning her mask back in place.

"O-OK! OK!" Maria said getting up, she pulled out a small staff and whipped it, making it stretch out wide into a full, large red and black scythe, with a rose print on the blade. Spike spun his bat and spat his gum out.

"So. Who's ass Im kicking first?" Said Spike. "Wait on second thought this might be unfair." Said Blink. "Me and Maria had blades while Spike has a bat, maybe we should-"

Before she could finish, Spike swung his bat and hit Blink sword, knocking it out of her hand before kicking her back at the ground. Blink fell back hard before she could even process what happen, dumbfounded but angry, she snarled. "Oh it's on now Motherfucker." She extended her hand and the sword flew back to her hand, as she charged towards Spike, who moved out of the way as soon as Blink swung her sword, which if he hadnt been for Maria's scythe, would have sliced her right up.

"Dude! Chill! This is a pratice!" Maria spoke as both of their blades were against eitch other. Blink hopped and flipped over her and landed on a tree branch, croutching like a ninja. She put her hands together and in a small puff of smoke and disappeared. Spike and Maria were back to back, ready to counterattack Blink, what they didnt expect was for her to attack from underground.

Buring up from the dirt, she got both of them off their feet and charged after Spike, who barely managed to regain his balance before his using bat his block Blink's sword. A back and forth of clash-clings-and-clangs between metal begun, one attacking the other but eitch blocking every attack again and again.

Spike ducked a sword slash and roundhouse kick Blink's leg, which was effective since she's practically a ninja. She backflipped back on her feet and kept attacking swiftly. But a sudden scythe blade cut in between them, stopping the fight.

"That's enough!!!" Maria shouted. "You both are gonna end up hurting yourselves or eitch other! im ending it now!!"

"Oh what the hell dude?!" Blink shouted indignified. "I was about to beat him!!" "Oh please." Answered Spike. "Was that the best you could do? Sakura could do a better job kicking my ass" He scoffed. They began to argue loudly, genuinely angry at eitch other.

"THAT"S ENOUGH!!!!" Maria shouted, making them, and everyone else look at her.

"It doesnt matter would win that fight! This was a practice and not a competition!! The point of us being a team and getting powers in the first place was for all of us to make the world a better place, but the only way that can happen is if all of us work together!! As a team!!!"

They stood in silence, listening to her talk and set them straight.

"As cheesy as that sounds, it's true!! We shouldnt fight eitch other like this, you're not just my friends, we're all friends with eitch other! We all go along well and we know that, that's why I got you all together, because no one can bond better in a team then all of us together!!!"

"... She's right." Togekiss added, walking towards them. "We all started as simple individuals with free time on a website, but we all shared common interests, we grew closer.. And suddenly like that, we all became friends.. A family, if you will."

"We take care of eitch other and look out for one another." Said Spooks.

"Just like how you all did for me.. When I almost died. Almost died because of the shit and violent world we live in." Maria said.. With a slight crack in her voice.

"You're bringing in the same violence that almost killed me.. So please.. Please stop fighting.. We're all in this together.. Right..?"

Spike and Blink dropped their weapons and hugged Maria, and everyone else joined in as well.

"You're right, we're sorry Queen." Said Spike. "We got overwhealmed and we didnt mean it. We wont fight again, because you're right." Added Blink.

"We only have eitch other in this world, and if we want to change it we have to stick together, just like you said." Spike said one more time.

"And we wont let you down.. We promise.." Griff finished, with everyone agreeing with what he said.

And so they stayed for a moment, embraced within eitch other in a group hug. A family isnt perfect, there will be disagreements, but a good bond will always overcome those disagreements, and that's what they had, a good bond.

A bond that's practically unbreakable and untaintable. A bond that will soon be ready, and fight together to make the world a better place.

A bond that will the world's Future Hope..

May I request Brunos gang headcannons with a new transgender male member? It doesnt have to be romantic and id rather it not be. Please message me if you have questions. Some details id like to see: He is around the same age as Trish and no longer can live with his parents. He doesnt have much money so he binds his chest with bandages and fabric he can find. He hasn't transitioned at all and his gender isnt obvious. his hair is cut poorly due to cutting it himself. i hope this is okay!

This was hard to do. Trans identity is tricky to write as a non-Trans writer. Hopefully I did you justice!

Non rom.

Bucci gang w/ a Transgender male member HC

Bucciarati

The most understanding of the group.

He's horrified that such a young person has to live by themselves, especially if your gender identity is the reason you have no caretakers.

He makes sure to introduce you properly to the team and makes them understand your situation, so that you feel comfortable around everyone.

You're part of the family now, it doesn't matter what you look like or what you identify as.

Will ask you if it's okay for you to go undercover as female for specific missions, or it's that's too uncomfortable.

If you'd rather not it's okay, Fugo will do.

He comes back one day with a package on one arm.

Turns out it's a custom made binder, all perfectly fitted to your specific body type and size!

So that's why he was so insistent on taking your measurements, without ever explaining why... That sly man.

Still, you couldn't be more grateful. Those things were so expensive.

"As long as you feel comfortable and stay in good health, I'm satisfied, Y/N."

Abbachio

He's the last one to care.

If anything, the thing he hates about you is that offensive hairstyle, are you kidding him?

Boy, girl, mischief, he doesn't care what your gender is or what's in your pants, he just doesn't want you to disrespect his eyes with such a horrendous haircut.

Like, seriously, who hurt you?

Takes you apart and forces your ass on a chair to actually give you a proper cut/shave.

Bucciarati is here too, to give advice on what looks good and works for your face shape and hair texture.

Abbachio has a fairly feminine appearance himself and hardly ever follows gender norms, so he's not fazed by your own neutral or 'confusing' physique.

Just tell him your pronouns already, or else he'll call you 'Brat' out of doubt, that's pretty gender neutral.

Would appreciate it if you trusted him enough to confess about your dysphoria, as he is victim of it as well.

Yes, even a Cis-man can feel dysphoric from time to time. Please pull each other up.

Giorno

As expected of him, he is very respectful.

The very first time he mistook you for a girl, but immediately apologized for his mistake and never got it wrong again.

In fact, he was so kind and polite about it, it's impossible to stay mad at him.

Afterwards he asks a lot of questions to be sure to know the boundaries you set, what is okay and not okay to talk about or do.

Will help you style your hair in the prettiest way and adds a lot of flowers on top of it.

He is a very feminine boy himself and will make you feel handsome and confident about your more feminine traits, just the way you deserve to be treated.

If he can rock the long hair, pink clothes, cute flowers and ladybugs ornaments and still look handsome as hell, then you can perfectly rock whatever physical traits you have. He believes in you.

Uses Gold Experience on you when you're on your periods so that it last shorter.

Helps you bind your chest until you can get a proper binder, and makes sure to be very gentle with you.

Has stolen Testosterone for you, and will do it again.

Mista

The most oblivious to your gender at first.

He can't tell if you're a boy or a girl and asks you a bunch of dumb questions without really thinking of the behinds of it.

If you get offended he'll just tell you he's trying to understand and is so confused.

It takes time and a lot of explaining, but he eventually gets it and, even though he still has a lot of questions, he decides to shut up.

Hey, you were pretty nice and funny and your Stand powers were dope, so at the end of the day, who cares?

He may be a bit of a dummy, but Mista is kind. He teaches you to shave in case you grow facial hair in the future.

He'll tell you all those grown up advices about how 'You start off with small peachfuzzes and before you know it, you got a full grown ass beard'.

Goes full Big Brother™ on you.

In fact, he barely calls your name at all, only calls you 'Bro', 'Fratellino', 'Mini me', 'Bambino', 'Big guy', or anything of the caliber.

Makes you workout with him to get those big ass guns and broad shoulders (or just... Your desired body type).

Narancia

Oh god, you don't have to fret about a thing.

He's just like you and gets misgendered All. The. Goddamn. Time.

His appearance is effortlessly androgynous and he sounds fairly prepubescent as well, so you're in the same boat here.

He doesn't really care and would love it for you to not care as well. He's used to it anyways.

It's not like your gender identity is gonna stop him from dragging you into his shenanigans and make you bust the sickest moves he knows.

You two are out together and get cat called by some obnoxious dudes on the streets.

You have to stop him from blasting them with Aerosmith because, as much as he's used to being called a 'She',

He WON'T stand other people misgendering you.

"HEY! SHUT THE FUCK UP! I'LL FUCKING KILL YOU! Y/N, tell him to go suck your dick! Oh- you don't have one yet? Huh... Well uh... SUCK MY DICK, ASSHOLE! Sorry about that Y/N."

Tells you you're lucky you don't have balls because those hurt really bad sometimes.

Fugo

Is too shy to ask too specific questions about your body or sexuality, but would love to know everything about it.

Especially the more psychologic aspect of your gender identity. How it affects your mental state, how you feel, what made you realize you were trans etc.

He may seem insensitive about it, but he's really not. He's just interested and takes it with a very scholar approach.

He pretends he really doesn't care at all, but he does a lot of research and harasses Bucciarati with questions about you.

You ask him to help you bind your chest one day and he becomes a blushy mess.

He'll help you anyway though, trying to be as neutral as possible out of respect for you.

He doesn't want to get flustered and let you imagine that he sees you as 'a girl', so he plays it cool.

It's... It's just a chest right? No big deal...

He slipped up one day and almost called the wrong pronouns and when he does, he just screams. Loud.

"Let's go ask Y/N then, where is sh-hhhhhhiiiaaaaaaAAAAAAAAARRGGHHHHH!!!!!"

He doesn't know how to come back from these mistakes and he's so embarassed.

Trish

You two have so much in common, surprisingly.

You're both young teens and your parents have left you down. You could only lift each other up.

She immediately knows you're a boy and gets so confused when people misgender you.

I mean... You look a bit feminine, yes, but there were plenty of men like this. And more so than you'd ever imagine. Especially at only 15.

Also, you introduced yourself as 'Y/N', that's pretty much masculine, or at the very least, gender neutral.

"Pfft, don't listen to them, Y/N. They're so darn stupid."

Helps you voice train, e-v-e-r-y-d-a-y.

She knows a lot of vocal warm ups and exercises to not strain your vocal chords and helps you get that perfect deep voice you try to achieve.

It's just like singing in a way, right? She helps you find your vocal range to expand it and lower it to your prefered pitch.

She's so proud of you when you manage to finally use a much deeper and manly voice!

She has very short hair herself, and she'll defintely help you style yours properly and take you to her personal hairdresser (a very kind femboy who's super funny and who's gonna love you to bits)

A Vegeta x OC Fanfiction (part 4) ¤ ¤ ¤

Calamatta managed to roll out of bed and redress herself. Pulling on the suit and grabbing a spare to bring with her on her trip to To-Rot. Leaving her room she met with Nappa. "There she is!" He chugged a caffeinated hot beverage down like it was nothing, Raditz stood beside him counting his wad of cash and stuffing it in his armor. 

"Pay looks nice." She yawns and stretches making her cute tail curl and back arch abit. "37,000. Not bad but could be better. Vegeta got the most of it." Nappa nods and pushes the yawning female saiyan a mug of the hot beverage. "Thanks...gonna need it." "Damn right you are! Vegeta is still sleeping. Weird he said he was gonna get up before us.. eh whatever. Lets get your pod and stuff ready then well worry bout him." Nappa said as Calamatta shined off the mug and pushed it away.

Upon going to the pod, her coordinates were set and everything was packed into there Raditz, who was standing besides her piped up, leaning against the pod with his massive arms crossed. "Dont take this the wrong way Calamatta but… why are you so…" he moves his hands in an hour glass shape and tilts his head. Calamatta went wide eyed and fixed her suit where her ass is. 

"If thats how you flirt with women that was a strike out, good lord! And I have know idea why! Its just my body shape idiot…" she comments hearing Nappa wheeze as he fixes some wires within the pod, followed by him clanging his head leaving. "Im not! I d-dont flirt its just that… well… shes got… n-nice legs and … a great fa-" Calamatta thwipped her tail like a nervous cat. The bay door slid open and Raditz's poor excuse for flirtation was stopped DEAD in its tracks. "Stop harassing Calamatta on her body type Raditz, Saiyan women were given bodys to kill, shes built like a fine tuned weapon whether you see it or not." Vegeta points up at Raditz who scowled with a full face of blush. "Oh so you look at her too Vegeta?" Calamatta slaps her forehead and raises her voice flicking Raditz in the forehead for his really stupid comment. "Can yall stop talking about me like im not fuckin here??" She snapped annoyed and heard Nappa close up the oxygen port.

 "Ready boss?" She asked Vegeta, who nodded and got into his respective pod and punched in the coordinates manually. "Later guys!" She got in and Raditz and Nappa left the pod evac room. 

Vegeta's voice sparked to life on her scouter. "Theres a hidden base by the most recent Frieza Force there.. we should make it there in an hour so that will be our base of operation. No breaches from outside forces." She nods and for the 2nd time in her life the pod flew straight out of the mothership into the cold vacuum of space. 

She crossed her arms and watched Vegetas whiz right past her hurtling with effort and ease to the planet that only seemed to become larger.. if that wasnt already more possible.

 She marveled at it… it was amazing. It was a shame she was there for a job to do. 

It was under 50 minutes where there pods broke entry to the planets atmosphere, careening and becoming hot to the touch, cold metal heating up faster, and faster becoming scorching red hot. Then the mountain range came into view, with the ship in sight the two pods crashed right into a large cave system. 

Welding their pods into the hard rock walls to jut through with 0 damage just enough room for the pods to open on the opposite side of the mountain. Calamatta and Vegeta pushed the button to open the pod bay doors, they took one solid whif of the atmosphere and Cala sighed. "To-Rot huh.. so wheres the base ship?" Cala steps her boots onto the alien planets surface. "5 miles that way. Stay within the tree line, follow my lead." The prince cracks his neck and blasts away leaving a trail of dust and debris behind him.

 "Say no more.." she stated following close behind Vegeta. Vegetas eyes were trained ahead. Toa ship that was covered in dirt and over growth. He tapped his scouter to be sure. "Perfect.. no signs of power levels. Excellent!" He smirked, the prince and Calamatta landed outside of the ship. Vegeta punched in a code and they were both let in. "Good.. now.. lets have a look around. The recent failed mission logs should have data from their logs. Have a look around for food and whatever else when i find the log ill call for you"  Vegeta announced as the hangar door shut behind them locking followed by a robotic voice. 

'Systems Armed'

Calamatta turned on her heels and scampered to the back of the ship. Vegeta watched the eager Saiyan trot away, with a sigh and a roll of his eye he headed towards the command deck of the ship. 

Collected with dust and opened up first aid kits, Vegeta scanned the surrounding area cautiously. 3 lone scouters covered in blood sat on the front of the deck. An ominous reminder of the past couple of grunts who died here. 

He snagged the three up and turned to call for Calamatta "Found them! Get up here!"

Calamatta dropped this box of rations she found and walked quickly to the front to see him plugging in the scouters logs. An unfamiliar voice chimed to life. 

"F-Force log number 1, we have arrived at To-Rot, this area is to be our base of operation since the inhabitants cannot scale plateaus or fly. We will commence terraformation and return in a week." Vegeta clicked the 2nd video, a bead of sweat rolled down his forehead. 

"F-Force Log number 2… uhm.. Que, Roa, and Gil went missing yesterday. We have been here for 3 days now and i have seen hide nor tail of them... ill send a distress warning to the mother ship but i will go and find my crew." 

He pressed the last one and the room suddenly became much heavier. "F-Force number 3… i found my crew.. w-whats left of them…" he held up baren bones and armor. "This planets fucked up… if you know whats good for you send the Saiyans.. theyll do a better job.. i couldnt save my crew! This is Nutte signing off… i'm going to look for Roa.”

"Thats… not good.." Vegeta groaned and plugged in the next scouter, A new crew came up on the screen, a crew of ten. The crew was looking around, brows raised and sweat on their brow. “So we are the 4th crew to come to this planet alone, from what were aware these uh… the main population of this race is highly hostile and we need to utilize lethal force...Well update as we go along.” After that log there was no update, no commanders log. He stepped away and swiped a hand through his hair. “Last log…”  He clicked on it which was 7 full days ago. 

A Log List of all the times this one computer has been logged into popped up. It was far more then 4.

10 Crew lists came through. Crews of upwards of 5 being the smallest to 30 being the most. All vanished within days of arrival. All of them mentioning, to send someone stronger, someone more capable. The Saiyans, they begged for the Saiyans help and they were all sent on suicide missions back to back to back to back.

Vegeta slammed his hands down on the console making it glitch the screen. “Of course theyd call for us…dammit!” He barked and kept his back turned away from her. “So they sent them on suicide missions because… they didn’t want to send us?” She questioned, furrowing her brows trying to wrap her head around the situation. “Frieza didnt want to send me and the other two… He sent US on a suicide mission.” Vegeta turned quickly and stared daggers into Calamatta, the overwhelming feeling of concern rain heavy within her head, and sat uncomfortably in her stomach like something she shouldnt have eaten.

Vegeta crossed the room and pointed his finger right into her chest a deep growl emanating from behind his bared teeth. “He went and sent ME with YOU so we can both perish!” “Hey hey what the hell! Calm down abit, well make it out of here ill follow orders.” Vegeta’s vein popped out on his forehead, eyes narrowed furious.

 “Thats not my point. Your optimism is the closest thing we have to any cocky behavior! It doesnt surprise me why Frieza sent me to a month long mission..” She put up her hands and once again her heart sunk; she went wide eyed staring into the princes heartlessly infuriated black eyes.

Friezas words rattled in her skull ‘your life is as forfeit to me as it is Vegeta…’

“I dont get why he would send both of us to die.” He turned back around and walked to a table with a map on it. “You stood at Frieza’s side for as long as you have been able to speak, you wanted freedom from him, now you might as well see the harsh reality, he never had any good intentions for you Calamatta. He wants you dead, so much so hell send the both of us to a lethal planet to terraform on our own…” He said flatly, Calamatta remained silent her tail loosely hanging from her waist. Her dignity and pride feeling like it was oozing out of her very pores. “Now get over here and lets get an idea of the land… this moon has two moons and we have to plan accordingly.” The map is very detailed of the entirety of the planet from the red deserts to the lush green forests and then to the grayed out city scapes. All of them giant hot beds of activity, teaming with life as they knew it. 

His orders were direct and bland. Calamatta dragged her feet, depressed. Feeling less and less like a Saiyan by the moment, it wasnt so much Vegeta.. it was how quickly she was starting to realize Frieza was right, and goddamn did it grate her nerves to know that... The idea of freedom is going to be lightyears more heavier then she could imagine, shes not even close and this is what she has to deal with. Calamatta tightened her tail back up around her waist and listened to her Princes expertise plan of attack.

¤ ¤ ¤

Tags:  @memevember @dragonblobz @gonuclear @msgreenverse @fallen--lilith ​ @jimbobslurpnchug @dragonballcollector @nikabriefs @lilhemmo @supremeleadershitlord @thotful-writing ​ @chickiedinner @anti-jaina @lizardhipsdontlie @dragonball-hcs-or-sum-shit ​ @solidsock​

WELCOME TO MY THOUGHTS WHILE REWATCHING THE MCU IN TIMELINE ORDER: THE AVENGERS

“the tesseract has awakened” oh you mean the glowy cube from captain america AND captain marvel? THAT glowly cube?? cool looking stairs- ew who tf are you? the grim reaper??

what the fuck is a chitauri and why does it sound like sea food. “a world will be his. the universe, yours.” STOP BLAMING THE PRONOUN GAME AND GIVE ME NAMES FFS

ooo shield base. “not a drill.” oh shits going down- COULSON. FUURRRYYY FUCK YEAH. the best marvel characters are here the movie has peaked- oldman from thor is here?? intoresting. and who the hell is this woman tryna question fury??

the glowy cube is a shE???????? HUH??????? oh hey its hawkeye the badass archer guy. oh shit things are going down. the cube is sparking and swirling??- IT OPENED A PORTAL

LOKKIII YOU BEAUTIFUL BASTARD WELCOME BACK. HE HAS A SHOOTY MAGIC SPEAR LIKE A BADASS. he just took out a bunch or shield with a shooty spe- OHMYGODS HE CAN CONTROL MINDS WITH IT.

“loki. brother of thor.” OLDMAN STFU

GUNS GO PEW PEW ALONG SIDE A GOOD OLD CAR CHASE SKSHSKKSHS. RUN FURY RUNNN. the portal imploded on itself like a moron hA

WHO TF NAMES THEIR CHILD “HILL” WTF. “we are at war.” NO SHIT SHERLOCK A NORSE GOD STOLE THE CUBE YOU WERE SUPPOST TO PROTECT

tis a train and a old building- NATASHA. how tf were you taken hostage? im so glad i have subtitles on otherwise i wouldnt understand a thing these ppl are saying. HOW TF IS SHE KICKING ASS WHILE TIED TO A CHAIR WHAT IN THE HELL-

oh his leg deff broke once he fell off the ledge tied to a chain. cut to a lil gorl running to find a doctor- who tf this is of course. THIS GUY IS BANNER??? i mean im glad they changed the actor but wtf. “theres no one that knows gamma radiation like you do.” YA DONT SAY, ROMANOFF. “STOP LYING TO ME” JESUS FUCK THAT MADE ME JUMP

oh damn shield has their own O5 council? cool. EXPLAIN WHAT PHASE2 IS ALREADY. also dont say thor is bad he is a giant puppy dog with a war-boner.

oh hi steve, working off that PTSD by beating the shit out of a punching bag ay? oh right steve knows the glowy cube. “at this point i doubt anything would surprise me.” “ten bucks says you’re wrong” welp ya owe him ten bucks steve

“is there anything you can tell us about the tesseract to help us now?” “you should’ve left it in the ocean.” WELL THAT HELPS ALOT DOESNT IT. hello there iron man, at the bottom of the ocean.? sure why the hell not

aye stark tower’s about to have clean energy, yay stark! “stark tower, is your baby.” how do you give birth to a tower.???????? KSHSJSHSKSJS COULSON BROKE INTO THE TOWER “is first name is agent.” TONY SKSHKSSHKSVSKSHSKS

*whisper whisper whisper* yeah she bribed tony with sex so he’d work on the avengers and stuff. “the guys like a stephen hawking.” “. . .” “hes like a smart person”

awh coulson is fangirling over steve- watched you while you were sleepin- man you’re awkward. you adorable dumbass. ohshit underground musky lab- OLDMAN AND LOKI

the world is breaking around loki. sea food army is restless- shut the fuck up you stupid looking eye wrapped bastard. WHO THE HELL IS THIS HE?????? welcome back to earth you smexy man

FLOATING WATER BASE

back to avenger tingz. man coulson is the biggest cap fan- oh its a giant sub- NO ITS A GIANT FLYING BASE HOLYSHIT SHIELD THATS AMAZING.

now we go into the meetings and talking related stuff :I yey. “lets vanish” wdym- IT HAD A CLOAKING DEVICE. HA STEVE JUST GAVE THE TEN HE OWED SKSHSKHSKSJS

i dont understand a word of all the science stuff they just said but yay. “i need a distraction. and an eyeball” barton what the fuck why do you need an eye.?

oh lokis in germany, at a very fancy party might i add. loki is best boy ever. even if he just bonked a the head/ OHMYGOD AND STOLE HIS FUCKING EYE JESUS CHRIST INFRONT OF ALL THOSE PEOPLE.??????

“i said. KNEEEEL” dont need to tell me twice-

blagh villain speeches are the worst. why tf did this old guy stand up “not to men like you.” shut up. SHOOT HIM- wtf. steve what the hell are you wearing? what the fuck is that- aye tonnnyyy!!!! he hacked into the jet thingy and started playing music from the speaker thats the best.

CAPSICLE SKSHSKSHKSHSKSJ- ohfuck thunder. THOR WELCOME TO THE PARTY. “im not overly fond of what follows” WKVSKSBSKSHSJS

HE JUST BROKE INTO THE JET AND STOLE LOKI FROM EM. “theres only one god ma’am. and im sure he doesnt dress like that.” cap stfu

“i thought you were dead.” “did you mourn.” damn loki thats harsh. thor is angy at his brother. “you listen well brot-ARGH” “..im listening?” STARK YOU CHOSE THAT MOMENT TO BODY SLAM THOR OFF THAT CLIFF AND LEAVE LOKI BEHIND? REALLY?

“.. tourist.” FIGHT FIGHT FIGHT FIGHT KICK HIS ASS, THOR. DONT KILL HIM WITH LIGHTNING THO

if someone throwed me against a tree i wouldnt be walking. im just saying

“THATS ENOUGH.” cap did you think that would work?? and how the hell did your dinner plate stop the power of thor

loki do be in jail tho. how’s this gonna go wrong- oh he smiled at banner. THATS how it goes wrong

tell him off fury! “you have made me very disapoin-“ OH NVM HE SAYS DESPERATE IGNORE THIS

“uNlimiteD pOoWeRRRRR”

“let me know if real power wants a magazine or something.” good comeback fury. i think

“loki is beyond reason, but he is of asgard. and he is my brother” “he killed 80 people in two days.” “he’s adopted.” KSBSKSJSJSJSK

“that man is playing galaga. he thought we wouldnt notice, but we did.” TONYKANSKSHKSJSKSJ tony is a fucking legend. “finally someone who speaks english!” “is that what just happened?” steve stfu you’re a fighty man not a smart man

“i do! . . . i understood that reference.” steve nvm keep talking please. PLEASE THE MAN IS STILL PLAYING GALAGA SOSJSKSJSJKS

why is tony eating blueberrys- where the hell did he get blueberrys. “we have orders. we should start following them.” steve you tried to get into the army under fake locations for months AND broke into a german base when you were a showpony. stfu about following rules

“so you’re saying the hulk.. the other guy? saved me” yes. yes we are saying that, banner. aye steve go break into shit like you’re suppost to :D

oh hi again oldman, welcome back. yay shield saved padme, and awh oldman talked about thor alot. thor i love you alot. loki just tell nat where tf you left barton :/ oh barton was sent to KILL nat?? not hire her?? well that went downhill. whomst the hell is dreykov- sao paulo- the hospital fire???? hawkeye wtf why’d you spill it all to loki.

mewley quim wtf kind of insult is that- oh damn nat figured out the hulk is lokis next plan of attack. PHASE TWO IS TO USE THE GLOWY CUBE TO MAKE FUCKING WEAPONS? SHIELD WHAT THE HELL

HA FURY TRIED TO LIE IS WAY OUTTA IT BUT BC STARK HACKED INTO IT ALL HE JUST EXPOSED HIMSKHSKSJSKS

WAIT THEY WERE MADE FOR THOR AND ASGARDIANS? WHAT THE FUCK SHIELD- oh damn lokis staff is the reason they’re all at eachother. probably

“yeah. big man in a suit of armor. take that off what are you?.” “genius, billionaire, playboy, philanthropist.” well you’re not wrong

guys stop fighting, HAWKEYE IS BREAKING IN. “in case you needed to kill me. but you cant. i know, i tried.” awh thats sad, i wanna hug banner so bad :(

OHSHIT AN ENTIRE WING GOT BLOWN UP THE FLYING BASE IS GOING DOWN- HULKS COMING OUT THATS NOT GOOD. the transforming is scary- RUN NAT

loki stop smiling because the plan is going your way. “it seems to run on some form of electricity.” “well you’re not wrong” tony stop being funny this isnt fair

HULK JUMPSCARE JESUS CHRIST- NAT GOT BITCHSLAPPED THROUGH A WALL- YAY THOR TO SAVE THE DAY. HAMMER TIME BABYY

*B O N K*

hulk trying to pick the hammer up is funny. BRIDGE IS UNDER ATTACK. DO YOU THINK SHOOTING HULK IS A GOOD IDEA??? HE JUST TOOK OUT FIGHTER JET AND ALMOST KILLED THE GUY FLYING IT

CAP IS KICKING ASS- OH GOD NO THE ENGINES ARE FAILING. OHGOD LOKI IS OUT- THOR YOU DUMBFUCK DID YOU FORGET LOKI CAN DO MAGIC SHIT? NOW YOU’RE STUCK IN THE GLASS CONTAINER

COULSON SAVE THOR! SHOOT LOKI DAMNIT- COULSON NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO

glass cage go brrrrr

HA LOKI GOT FUCKIN SHOT BY COULSON BEFORE HE DIES( :( ) tony almost got minced by the engine thingys

im gonna cry coulson how dare your death make me sad :(( stupid heart breaking aftermath moments.

thor is stuck in a field, banner fell through the roof of a building. awh the security guard is so nice :) barton is a fucking mess right now “how’d you get him out?” “i hit you on the head really hard.” KSJSKKSSK

tony figured out lokis plan- ITS TAKING PLACE AT HIS TOWER? THE AVENGERS IS TAKING ACTION BABY LETS GOOOO

wait a fucking moment, the cards coulson has are covered in blood. so you’d think they were on him when he was stabbed- yet hill just said they were in his locker “they needed the push.” FURY YOU RUINED NEAR MINT VINTAGE COLLECTABLE CARDS TO MOTIVATE SUPER FREAKS???

o hi loki welcome to stark tower

“stalling wont change-“ “no no, threatening. no drink? ya sure? im having one.”

“i have an army.” “we have a hulk.” HE SAID IT, HE SAID THE LINE

HA LOKI CANT TAKE STARKS MIND BC HIS HEART IS SOME TECHY METAL CRAPKSJSKSJSKS- i guess choking and tossing him around works. so does throwing hik out a window

oh no the glowy cube just opened a portal for the army of seafood. they look like creatures from halo.

BROTHER FIGHT

CHAOS EVERYWHERE

PLANE DOWN PLANE DOWN

what the fuck just growled- HOLYSHIT THEY HAVE A SPACE LEVIATHAN. it looks badass ngl. loki redemption arc? nope he just stabbed thor.

SPACE BIKE GO BRRRRR

yes because arrows and guns will stop the, alien monsters with lazer arms. some how its working. “just like budapest all over again.” “you and i remember budapest very differently.” WTF HAPPENED AT BUDAPEST BARTON AND NAt, HUH?

cap just scared the shit outta some police men HAHA

“i have unfinished business with loki.” “yeah? get in line” barton is snarky right now. banner just rides up on a motercycle like “hi what i’d miss”

“im bringing the party to you.” stark says while being chased by a giant metal space whale who’s crashing and crushing everything in its path along a street

“thats my secret cap. im always angry.” FUCK YEAH BANNER MESS THAT SPACE WHALE UP. HE JUST PUNCHED A GIANT FUCKING WHALE THING.

the music, the avengers circling around. its amazing. well things are gonna get worse bc more space whales showed up

“and hulk. . . smash.”

LIGHT THEM FUCKERS UP, THOR. shield maybe instead of watching, maybe, oh i dont know. HELP THEM???

i dont know what else to say other then its alot of fighting and smashing alien faces into the ground

hulk and thor kicking ass on the back of a space whale is awesome. HULK WHY DID YOU PUNCH HIMSJSOSHSKJSKSJSKSKSKSK

i fuxking love when steve turtle shells behind his shield.

“director fury. the council has made a decision.” “i recognize the council has made a decision. but given its a stupid-ass decision, i have elected to ignore it.” fury never stop being awesome

loki thought he was so smug when he caught bartons arrow, then it blew up in his face. literally IKSKSKSKSKS

HULK FUCK LOKI UP! JSHSKSGKSHSJSHSJSJ HE JUST TOSSED LOKI AROUND LIKE A RAGDOLL “puny god.” “*pained wheezing from a smooshed loki*”

oh damn- OH DAMN, STARK. he just jonahed the fucking whale thing and blew it up from the inside. well now the city has a nuke coming for it :/

yall have a chance to shut the portal down, and tony, you want to go INTO that portal and throw the nuke in? wtf stark.

TONY GO BACK TO EARTH DAMNIT FUCKING BASTARD PASSED OUT. yay hulk saved his stupid ass. do cpr.? mayb.? or a hulk roar will wake him up KEJSKJSKSSKJS

tony. you just blew up a alien command center with a nuke, passed out and fell to earth through a portal. and you want, shawarma?

and now back to loki. “if its all the same to you, i’d like that drink now.” ISHSKSJSJSJSKSJSJ

STAN LEEE

the people love em. yey

council lady stfu about the avengers being a threat. they just said the earth and you’re worried about them going rouge??

“if we get into a situation like this again, what happens then?” “they’ll come back.” i mean theres three more avenger movies so i assume so. remodaling stark towers so its the avenger tower? neat!

NEXT MOVIE: IRON MAN 3

*MID CREDIT SCENE* oh hi again mr no eyes. do we get to see this HE? OH WE DO. o hi mr 10 chins

once again ignore the misspells it was three AM when i finally finished this and im just now rereading it

Summer Shopping

Katsuki Bakugo x Female Reader

Main Characters: Katsuki Bakugo, Eijiro Kirishima

Warnings: slightly sexual content

(GIF not mine)

You and Bakugo had a.... questionable relationship.

The two of you had been head over heels for each other since your first few days. You were a new student about 5 weeks into the school year at UA. According to SOME people, that was a bit unusual, as Bakugo decided to loudly voice your first day.

You really thought the fiery blond had something special. He was powerful, confident, and, surprisingly, very nice- sometimes even sweet. The only thing you didn’t know is that you were the only person he was ever nice to, other than occasionally being nice to his friends. Eijiro Kirishima, Denki Kaminari, and Hanta Sero were all very nice to you. Then again, most guys in the school were. You were attractive, that’s for sure. That’s the first thing most high school guys, including Bakugo, notice in a girl. However, he realized that there were far more guys in the school that could impress you and treat you far better than he believed he could. So he settled with being friends with you. Kiri, Kaminari, and Sero all welcomed you into the group immediately, especially when they noticed that the scent of caramel intensified whenever you came and sat in your seat every morning. Even if they thought you were attractive, they knew Bakugo didn’t like girls just for looks. There was more to you that he liked, so they had an unspoken agreement not to go after you (at least not seriously, of course).

Kirishima sat right in front of you, and Bakugo to your left. Denki was behind you, and Sero behind him. It was your own personal classroom solar system that made the days go by a lot faster. You liked to watch as Bakugo put actual effort into making his notes, and he even took them when he didn’t need to. Part of you didn’t even like him a lot till you realized he wasn’t just a cocky asshole- he actually worked. And he worked really hard to achieve his dreams of becoming number one hero. One of the reasons you went from thinking of him as cocky to confident within a few days of meeting him was the fact that he had the power and smarts to back up every remark he made.

You liked to think about Bakugo whenever you did homework. Although it didn’t help much with your grades, at least it made it seem like it went faster. You were filling in formulas and writing down equations when you were snapped out of your thoughts.

“You did it wrong.”

You looked over at the ruby eyes, staring, not at you, but at your paper on your desk.

“Well why were you looking at my paper?” You teased, smirking as his eyes now locked with yours.

“Well you’d been humming. And it was annoying so I was gonna tell you to shut the hell up,” he dead panned. “But I saw you scribbling like the paper killed your dog, and got curious,” he rested his arm on the back of his chair, cooly leaning back and looking over at you. He tried to hold back a smirk. “Besides, why would I cheat off you for the wrong answers?”

You looked back at your paper. Much to Bakugo’s pleasure, your cheeks were dusted with a light pink shade. He smirked, reaching over with his pencil and erasing the mistakes you’d made. He started to explain how you use the equation in the most monotonous voice, but you still liked the sound of it. It was times like this when everyone else in the room was shocked. But mostly they were shocked that he always treated you like this, and you still hadn’t caught on.

“Thank you, Bakugo,” you whispered as he pulled his pencil away. He gave a slight nod before returning back to his own work, not giving you another glance the rest of the class period.

It was at this moment that Eijiro Kirishima decided this was gonna happen.

•••••

Flash forward a couple months and there you are, sitting in the classroom as summer training camp was being discussed. The idea of shopping had been brought up, and you had (seemingly) forgotten about the explosive boy sitting in the chair next to you as you talked to the girls in your class. He listened as you and Mina went on and on about how it would be a good opportunity to get some new clothes for camp.

“I need to get some new swimsuits! I only have a few!” She exclaimed, examining her pale pink complexion. “Might as well tan in my free time!”

“You already have a few? I don’t have any,” you giggled shyly, shrugging while Mina’s jaw dropped. Some of the other girls heard this conversation and decided to chime in.

“Why don’t you have any swimsuits?!” Toru exclaimed, uniform arms waving in the air.

“I’ve never really had a need for one,” you put a hand on the back of your neck.

“Okay, we HAVE to go shopping. You’ve gotta get something to make these boys drool. It’ll be nice entertainment,” Momo joked. Bakugo wanted to scream out how annoying this conversation was. How stupid it was to worry about how many different outfits you bring to camp. It’s training, not a fashion show, he thought. But he knew some of his anger came from the jealously he felt at Momo’s last comment. His hands crackled as the conversation got louder.

“Hey! I’ve got an idea!” Mina shouted. “How about a class shopping trip?!”

“Yeah! We’ve never actually hung out as a class!” Kiri said, seeing this as a perfect opportunity. He happily watched as both girls and boys agreed it would be fun, hopefully hyping it up. “I’ll see you there, right Bakugo?”

“I couldn’t imagine something more annoying.” He mumbled as the bell rang. He grabbed his things and began leaving the classroom. Kiri caught up to him, even if he did risk some of his chicken-scratch notes by cramming them in his bag.

“Come on, Baku-bro,” he lowered his voice, nudging his fiery friends shoulder. “Swimsuit shopping all day with y/n? You know she’s gonna have to try those on, right?”

Bakugo halted. Kiri knew EXACTLY how Bakugo felt about y/n. Kiri saw as Bakugo watched you hum happily while drawing pictures or reading books during free period. He saw the little smile that krept onto his face when he gave you any extra food at lunch. He saw the red dust on his cheeks when you fell asleep on his shoulder at dorm movie nights. Bakugo began imagining swimsuit shopping with you, but quickly kicked the thoughts out of his head before they could go further.

“WHO THE HELL DO YOU THINK I AM?? SOME SORT OF CREEP?!” Bakugo seethed at the redhead, causing a drop of sweat to roll down Kiri’s forhead. Of COURSE Bakugo wanted to see you in swimsuits, but he respected you more than just going for that alone.

“No! Of course not, bro!” He waved his hands in front of him, trying to calm down the angry teenager before his plan fell apart. “But there will be other guys creepin on her there. I know you wouldn’t want that, would ya?” Kiri smirked triumphantly as he watched something click in Katsuki’s head.

Bakugo thought for a moment. He knew this was some sort of trap Kiri was setting, but he figured on one hand, if he calls him out, Kiri and other guys could just ‘keep an eye on you.’ Bakugo was too jealous for that. If he said yes, he would get to spend all day with you, seeing you in cute clothes and swimsuits that would probably- no, definitely- look amazing on you. Maybe he could even kick some ass if guys were looking too long. Maybe buy you a boba tea, he knows you love that stuff. And who knows, maybe he would actually find the guts to ask you out. It seemed that was the only risk he wasn’t willing to take right away. His body? No problem. His LIFE? No problem. You? No way. There’s no way he wanted to risk losing you.

“Uhh... hello? Did I lose ya?” Kiri knocked on his head.

“DONT TOUCH ME.” Bakugo said, being snapped out of his thoughts.

“YEAH DOESNT FEEL GOOD, DOES IT?” Kiri yelled back.

“Fine!” Bakugo caved. “I’ll go to the stupid mall. But don’t expect me to fucking enjoy it.”

“Why won’t you enjoy it Bakugo?” You piped up, you and Sero finally catching up to the boys. Kiri had planned ahead and had Sero hold you back in the classroom for a little longer than usual. Bakugo did his best to deadpan at the sound of your voice. His friends could always tell when he was nervous around you because of his scent, but you must’ve been used to it.

“Because everyone will be there and I hate them.”

“But I’ll be there! And you don’t hate me, do you?” You fake pouted. Even though he knew it was fake, your expression pulled at some part of his chest.

“Well... I hate you less than everyone else,” he shrugged. This time, Kaminari decided to play along.

“Even less than me, Bakugo?” He sniffled.

“Oh waaaaay less than you, toaster face,” he laughed and continued walking, with you close behind.

•••••

The next day, Bakugo was waiting at the mall. He always woke up early and he hadn’t stuck around class long enough to hear when they were meeting, so he sat there for about an hour before anyone else showed up. He didn’t mind though, as he just spend the time scrolling through pictures you, Kaminari, and Kirishima had been taking over your last couple months in the friend group. He found himself smiling back at one of the photos of you, staring at it for who knows how long.

“Man, I knew you liked her but I didn’t know it was this much,” Sero’s voice rang out beside him. Katsuki jumped, almost dropping his phone as his eyes went wide.

“HOW LONG HAVE YOU BEEN STANDING THERE, CREEP?!”

“Bout 5 minutes,” Sero answered casually, leaning back on the bench Bakugo had been waiting on all morning.

“Hey guys!” Kaminari said, walking up with you by his side. You lived a few houses away from him, so Bakugo was glad you could go to and from school safely with Kam. Bakugo nodded a “what’s up” at him.

God, you looked good today. A cute pair of pale blue ripped jeans, a pair of red sneakers and his favorite sweatshirt to compliment it. Though you had gotten 10th in the UA Sports Festival, you bought one of the marketing teams quick product ideas. A gray sweatshirt with “KATSUKI BAKUGO” printed in black and red lettering on it. You quite liked the sweatshirt, and Bakugo was happy you did. He loved seeing his name on you in big letters.

“Lookin cute, y/n,” Kiri said, giving you a sly smirk as he walked up on the scene. You blushed, but didn’t get flustered. Kiri often flirted with you. You weren’t into him like that, and he wasn’t into you like that either. He just did it cause he liked to see Bakugo’s glare afterward, which he warmly welcomed this morning. He secretly hoped that one day, Bakugo would get jealous enough to confess his feelings for you on the spot. He soon realized Suki was too strong headed for that though.

“Thanks!” You replied.

“I like your sweatshirt,” Katsuki said, eyes not leaving his red haired friend.

“Thanks! Me too!” You said, oblivious to the death glare he was giving Kiri as you looked at the big beautiful mall before you.

Once everyone had shown up, you all went your separate ways. Bakugo had agreed to go with you and Kiri. He didn’t much like that Kiri was there, but Kiri kept his distance so you and Baku could spend as much time together as possible. He would only butt in to make sure you didn’t get distracted by his absence.

“Soooo what kind of stuff do you have to get?” Bakugo asked, looking around at all the people before getting a bit closer to you.

“Well, I need a few swimsuits. Maybe a couple outfits just in case. But nothing much,” you said, attempting to keep the conversation to a minimum. You’d be damned if you embarrassed yourself in front of Katsuki right before summer camp.

“Swimsuits?” Bakugo repeated, turning slightly pink.

“Mhm! I don’t have any.”

“Right... well, how about this shop?” He said, stoping in front of a nice little store with light and summery apparel. Things that reminded him of your personality.

“This looks good! I’m not really sure what to look for, to be honest,” you said, pushing into the store before he could see your flustered cheeks.

“This one’s nice.” He said, trying his best not to blush as he reccomended a deep red one piece with cuts at the waist and back.

“I do like that one a lot!” You said, grabbing one in your size and carrying it on your arm.

“Hey, Y/n! How about this one?!” Kiri said, holding up a relatively small, black bikini. Your face turned red with embarrassment as Katsuki’s turned red with rage.

“Uhh... I guess I need a couple. I’ll try it,” you shrugged, trying to be nice. Kiri had good intentions- you knew that. You just weren’t exactly sure what they were.

You had picked out a couple more before deciding to find a fitting room.

“You should come out and show them to us! Well tell ya if they’ll be good for camp or not,” Kiri smiled innocently. You nodded shyly as you stepped into the room. As soon as the door closed, Bakugo exploded. Not literally. Thank goodness.

“What the hell are you trying to pull here, Eijiro?!” He said, punching his arm. “You said this was an opportunity for ME. STOP BEING A CREEP.”

“Come on man, I’m just trying to give you something to work with for your fantasies,” he laughed. “You’re not making any moves on her irl so I’m gonna at least help improve your dreams.” Bakugo grabbed his collar, but the laughing didn’t cease.

“YOU BASTARD. I’LL—”

Katsuki was cut off by the door opening again. His head snapped over to you, and he swears he felt his heart dive into his stomach. He had never seen someone look so amazing in the color red (other than himself, of course). He wanted to scream out how hot you were. He wanted to run to you and tell you how much he loved you and how gorgeous he thought you were. But he wouldn’t let himself do it.

“You look...”

“Amazing!” Kiri encouraged, giving you a cheesy thumbs up.

“Yeah. You look amazing.” Bakugo’s eyes were wide, and he refused to take them off you, which is something you weren’t expecting. The most you had been expecting was a nod and maybe a glance at you before he looked away.

“Than-“

“GUYTH LOOK!” Mineta’s voice echoed through neighboring stores. “Y/N’TH TRYING ON THWIMTHUITS!” A small group of guys, with Mineta hoisted up on their shoulders came running into the shop. Bakugo ran to you, pushing you into the stall with his eyebrows furrowed and a frown evident on his face.

“BACK OFF YOU BASTARDS. SHE’S MORE THAN JUST A HOT BODY,” he yelled, making Mineta visibly shake as Kiri got ready to fight off some pervs. Kirishima was definitely surprised to see guys from other classes in their school. He figured Mineta had invited his perv friends with to watch the girls. Though he was slightly disappointed when he saw Shinso in said group.

You winced as you listened to Kiri’s swears along with the sound of feet hitting the ground. You didn’t realize Bakugo still had his arms wrapped around you from pushing you into the stall, his breath still heavy as his eyes stayed focused on the door handle.

“Baku-“

“Katsuki,” he said, not moving his eyes, but lightly releasing his grip on you. “Please call me Katsuki. I hate hearing you call me what everyone else calls me.” You blushed at his words, but accepted.

“Well.... Thank you, Katsuki,” you said, planting a small kiss on his cheek. You’d done this to the other guys before. Not often, but it had definitely happened, but never to Bakugo. He froze, turning to look at you after a second. You couldn’t read him at all. Surprised? Angry? Scared? You went with angry, as that’s usually what he was. “I’m sorry, I shouldn’t have—”

“No I liked it.” He said, trailing the two of you into a small silence. You looked down at your hands. “I liked it a lot.”

“You did?” You said, looking up. He only nodded, eyes still wide. Silence engulfed you again as you tried to find words to say. Katsuki’s eyes never left your face.

He hated himself. He hated himself for how much he liked you. How attractive he thought you were. How gorgeous he thought those eyes were, or how bright your smile was to him. He hated the fact that he just wanted to hug you. And cuddle you. How he could just get lost in you so easily. How he could mess things up so fast. But he was gonna do it anyways. One shot, Bakugo. One shot.

He grabbed you gently, as if you’d break if he didn’t. He pressed his lips onto yours harshly. He had never kissed a girl before, and you could definitely tell, but you liked it anyways. You kissed back, placing a hand in his messy hair. It had only lasted a few second, but it had felt like forever before he pulled away.

“Sorry.” He said, avoiding eye contact. He went for the door handle. “I should just—”

“If you two kissed, I’m gonna lose my sHIT,” Kiri’s voice came from outside the stall. Bakugo quickly rushed out, intending to rush out of the store. He had to get away from that feeling. Something in his head told him the pounding in his chest was very bad. Thankfully, Kirishima’s arm stopped him.

“What happened?”

“I kissed her.”

“YOU WHAT?!”

“Yeah. So what?”

“How was it?!”

“It was okay.”

“But... don’t you like her?!”

“Guess not.”

“What?! But I set all of this up for you perfectly!! I thought—”

Kiri was interrupted by a figure rushing by him, disheveled and fast. You had quickly changed when Bakugo left, hearing his words right as you stepped out. Kiri turned toward his blond friend, whose face was straight and emotionless.

“Asshole.”

That’s all he said before he ran after her. Bakugo’s heart shattered at what he did to himself. What he did to you. He hated that he heard whimpers as you ran out of the store. He hated that he caused them. He wanted nothing more than to wipe them away and hold you. He wanted to tell you he’s sorry. But he couldn’t. Something wouldn’t let him, but his heart ached. And for some reason, Kiri’s last word echoed in his head. He could feel it bouncing off each side of his heart as he walked home.

•••••

The next morning, Kaminari stormed up to Bakugo, who was waiting around for the bus to camp.

“WHAT DID YOU DO?!” He yelled, electric bolts leaking from his clenched fists. “WHY WAS SHE CRYING THIS MORNING? She wouldn’t walk with me, and she was with YOU yesterday. What did you do?!”

“She did it to herself.” No she didn’t, you asshole, you crushed her.

“Yeah right!”

“He kissed her,” Kiri barged in. “He kissed her and then he made sure she heard him say that he didn’t like her because he’s not man enough to deal with his emotions.”

“Watch yourself, shitty hair.”

“You know what? Fuck you, hot head. You’re only mad cause I’m right,” he seethed. Kiri NEVER got mad like this. “You broke her heart. She was on the phone with me all night last night. She was considering not even coming to camp.”

“But it’s not optional-“

“Yeah. She knows.”

The pair went quiet as she walked past. Not making any noise. Bakugo couldn’t stop looking at her. He was in love with this girl and what did he do? Broke her heart and fucked everything up. It’s all you’re good at. He watched as she made her way over to Todoroki and Deku, feeling jealously bubble in his blood. Why was she with them? Why was she laughing at Shoto’s jokes? Why was she looking over at Deku when he laughed?

“If you’re wondering why she’s with them, I texted Shoto last night. I asked if he and Izuku could hang out with her. I didn’t tell them why, I just thought she’d like some company,” Kiri mumbled to his friend, arms crossed with a glare on his face. “And I can’t be around her as much as I’d like to, cause I have to deal with your insecure ass.”

“I get it Kiri.” Bakugo grunted. “You don’t have to keep rubbing it in.”

“No, Bakugo, I DO. You totally broke her heart after weeks of wanting her! Did you fuck it up on purpose?!”

“I DONT KNOW.” His fists clenched, with small explosions leaking out from them. He calmed down a bit, shoulders slumping and hands releasing. “I don’t know.”

“Alright class,” Mr Aizawa yelled as the bus pulled up. “We’re going to be in pairs on the bus ride. So choose your partners now.”

Part of Bakugo wanted to run to you and grab your hand. But he knew you’d just refuse him. So he only watched as you and Deku decided to ride together. He understood it. You liked drawing heroes and he liked writing about them. You’d probably have great conversations. He formed a plan as fast as he could as you boarded the bus before Deku, with him running back to the bench to grab his bag.

“DEKU,” he yelled, hands in his pockets as he walked up to him.

“AHHyes Kachan?” He said, jumping at Bakugo’s calling and flinching back when he began walking to him.

“I need a favor. And if you start crying, I’ll beat your ass. Understand?”

“Uh y-yes Kachan I understand!” He nodded, sweat running down his forehead as he smiled nervously.

“I need you to trade seats with me about half way through the bus ride. I have to talk to y/n.”

“Uh, okay! May I ask... why?” He winced.

“NO. But you’ll be sitting next to Kirishima,” he said, stalking away. He sat down next to Kiri.

“What did you do now?” Kirishima asked.

“Nothing. I’m fixing things.”

“You better.”

•••••

It had been awhile since the bus had started toward camp. You and Deku were sat at the back of the bus, with Todoroki and Tokoyami on the other side. You and Deku had been talking about costumes, and he had asked if you could help him design another one. He had one, but he enjoyed watching you draw and you said you needed inspiration. However, he had seemed a bit far away the last few minutes.

Bakugo had begun death glaring him the last couple minutes, trying to prepare the green-haired boy to swap places. He had updated Kirishima on everything and he didn’t mind sitting next to Midorya. They got along just fine and he really did admire all of his abilities.

Bakugo silently got up, queuing Deku to quickly find an excuse to swap.

“I-uhhh... I have to go ask Aizawa a question!” He said, getting up quickly and bringing his belongings with him. You shrugged, going back to your drawing. That is, until you felt someone else sit next to you.

Bakugo sat down, sweating a lot more than he thought he would. Keep your cool, Katsuki. He stared straight ahead as he felt your eyes burning into him.

“Hey,” he said, shifting uncomfortably.

“Hi...” you responded, turning your attention to the window.

“About yesterday...”

“It’s ok,” you lied. You felt his gaze turn to you.

“No it’s not. Look,” he said, getting your attention. You turned to look at him and he turned his body towards you. “I didn’t mean what I said... after I left the stall.”

“Then why did you say it?” You asked. If he did like it, if he did like you, why would he say such hurtful things? Even Kiri was confused. He had hyped you up, telling you that Bakugo liked you.

“Because....” he paused, turning to look at the seat in front of him. He shoved his left hand into his pocket, pinching the bridge of his nose with the other. “This is gonna sound so stupid,” he mumbled. You furrowed your brows, waiting for an explanation. “It’s because I was scared.”

“Why were you-”

“I was scared cause I’ve liked you for a long time I thought I already messed it up when I.... yknow,” he said, shifting uncomfortably and rubbing his neck. “Anyways, I figured maybe if I made you hate me it wouldn’t hurt as much I guess. Kiri told me I did it cause I couldn’t handle my emotions like a man and... he was right.”

There was a small silence between the two of you. Your attention was turned to your feet as you thought for a minute. At least he came and owned up to it, right? You could never hate him. It just hurt you a lot when he said those things.

“I don’t mean to eavesdrop...” you and Bakugo turned your attention to Todoroki. “But coming to her and admitting you were scared is a very manly thing to do.”

Bakugo looked down at his shoes, his cheeks turning a shade of red. You smiled at Todoroki, who grinned back, before looking to Bakugo.

“Thanks, icy-hot.” He mumbled, leaning his head forward on the seat in front of him, elbows on his knees. You leaned against his shoulder, causing him to look at you.

“I’m proud of you for coming over and telling me that, Bakugo.”

“Katsuki.”

“Katsuki,” you smiled, wrapping your arms around him. “Does this mean we’re together?” you questioned.

“Uh... if you want it to,” he said. The pink on his cheeks turning into a red color. “We can do whatever you want.”

You decided words weren’t needed, leaning over and kissing his cheek. You wrapped your arms tighter around him. He wiggled an arm free, wrapping it around you as well. After another couple minutes, you fell asleep against him. You were used to falling asleep on his shoulder thanks to the movie nights Kaminari would always set up for the group.

Katsuki looked down at you as you slept on him. He smiled and planted a kiss on your head, leaning his own back and letting himself relax. I love you, he thought, though he would never say it out loud. At least not for awhile.

•••••

Bonus

“HA!” Kirishima yelled, throwing his hands into the air. “SERO OWES ME 500 YEN!”

“We never shook on it so it doesn’t count,” Sero smiled.

“Yeah we.... DAMNIT.”

“Heh... better luck next time Kirishima,” Deku smiled. “Um... what were you betting on anyways?”

“I bet Sero that Bakugo and Y/n would be together by the time we got to camp.”

“Weren’t you yelling at Bakugo for breaking her heart this morning?” Kaminari said, unimpressed.

“Yeah, but I am a young entrepreneur, I might as well make money off of it,” he shrugged.

“Even though you didn’t.”

“SHUT UP, TAPE ARMS.”

[image description: a q&a for the webcomic someone always cares. full desc under the cut because its long and wordy sorry]

post chapter 3 Q&A

first - previous - next

thanks for yalls questions!! it was fun to answer! if anyone still has questions feel free to ask whenever i am always 100% down to ramble. even if i did go slightly off topic in some answers

additional: went off topic with the hair question a bit. their bright hair is all part of the transformations. regular hair dye does exist though. best way to tell is that if the eyebrow matches the hair its probably not dyed. also, quartz’s hair is naturally ginger.

also for more on ages, check out the character bios here

also was gonna keep this in the tags but thought i might as well actually try to answer it: the question i found it hardest to answer was someone the song one. my taste in music is. a mess really. ive been listening to like the same 5 songs on repeat all day. more under the cut because i was rambling again and now its uhhh half 1am

if it helps at the time of answering that specific question i had home by cavetown on repeat, and that song reminds me of both rami and lewis. but that may be because i project onto those two a lot, and as a aro trans dude. who sucks with people skills, yeah of course i love that song.

specifically the vibes of like not knowing how to communicate (rami is fine with his friends but other people are different), the lines “ Turn off your porcelain face, I can't really think right now and this place, Has too many colors, enough to drive all of us insane” idk what the porcelain face line is supposed to mean but im picturing it as like. a mask. that you need to take off and stop hiding and rami does tend to hide when hes feeling upset, and the next two lines kinda could tie into that, like the feeling of when youre overwhelemed and just want the world to stop so you just hide somewhere. also the colours could go with chapter 3 with the chromatic abberation.

also the bit with “ my eyes went dark, I don't know where, my pupils are, But I'll figure out a way to get us out of here” just kinda sums up ramis whole hero thing with his powers and all. anyway this has turned into less what songs rami would like and why this particular song reminds me of him and lewis (lewis specifically has the hair cutting/chest hiding, [big transmasc mood], and also messy haired trainwreck who doesnt know who he is yet. also the ghosts bit)

i did end up picking upbeat songs because ramis a dude who like to try and be upbeat even if things arent. even if hes not really feeling it he will pretend to.

[full description: Anonymous said to someone-always-cares: “hi ily!!! do characters like quartz who have colored hair have that naturally or did they dye it?”

“its both natural and not! while most supers can do a magical girl ish transformation, including a change in hair colour, there are some exceptions.”

theres two small full body drawings of rami, one in civilian clothes, one fully transformed.

“if a superhero were to have a biological child, the child will inherit the powers of the parent(s). however, the child will not inherit the full transfromation. they do inherit any physical transformations, but not the outfit.”

theres a drawing of a woman in blue, quartz’s mother, fully transformed, holding her mask in her hand, smiling down at a much younger quartz as a child. hes smiling back up at her with the same blue eyes, pointy ears, and blue hair, but hes still in normal clothes.

“in the case of quartz, both of hisparents had superpowers, and he inherited those powers and the physical transformations.he can also pick and mix whatphysical traits to change.“

next is a headshot of adult quartz, his face split down the middle with one side having hair and eye like his mother, the other like his father. theres a list of traits from each parents, blue hair and eyes and pointy ears from his mum, and purple hair and eyes and pointy teeth from their dad.

 “Anonymous said to someone-always-cares:  Are all the characters the same age? If not, how old are they? Are they irl friends or just superhero friends?”

theres some headshots of rami and his team lined up with ages labelled: cam is 15, rami himself is 17, lin, mateo, and dante, are all 18, and cap is 20.

“rami and xandra were somewhat friends before she got superpowers, so when, after the incident with her old team, she found rami had developed powers, xandra stuck close to him. their other teamates started off as superhero friends but soon turned into irl friends too”

theres a headshot of lewis and jade. theyre both 17

“when lewis first decided to start being a vigilante,jade quickly found him and decided to help train himand offered to be a mentor of sorts, as they both have similar powers. that quickly derailed.”

“ cinder5555 said to someone-always-cares: How long does it usually take to make a comic page? I'm curious because they're so freaking good that they must take FOREVER”

theres a drawing of myself, a fluffy hair tired bastard in a hoodie, smiling

“Thanks! Ive been doing this shit since like 2017 and i still have no idea how long it takes me. i can get a page done in a day if i have nothing else to do or if its a simple page, but if i have work then maybe 2-3 days? i spend like, most of my free time doing this.“

another drawing of me, now looking frustrated muttering “how the FUCK does time work”

“but i can never do it all on one sitting.i will inevitably get distracted and zone out daydreaming mid drawing so its very hard to get an accurate read on how long it takes. so however long a piece of string is i guess“

the only qustion not from tumblr is a discord message from RuneStone Cabin:

“Q: Can you talk about the incidence of superpowers in this world? Like many people are supers, which powers are more or less common, how long they've been a thing for, stuff like that. Also does Omen know I'd die for them “

theres a drawing of omen pointing at a date circled on a calender marked “decembuary”, theyre saying “i know. i already wrote your death in my calender.”

then a giant wall of text reading: “Supers have only existed for a relativly short time, since the early 1940s. momento mori was the second person to have ever gained powers.

Only a small number of the population are supers! the chances are higher in more populated cities, but unusally london has oneof the higher percentages of supers. while nobody in universe has any idea of the origins of superpowers, it does seem that powers are more likely to occur in people who would actually use their powers.

as for what powers are most common, after making a badly catagorized spreadsheet of every superpowered character ive made for this world (70% of which will probably never even be seen), turns out that elemental powers are the most common. although not all elemental powers manifest as the straight up 'controling this element' as seen in characters like lin or tsunami. for example, iris's powers would fall under shadow elemntal powers, but theyre a lot more weird that just controlling shadows.there are some abilities that have never been seen before,such as ressurection or full on time travel (aka anything that could bring a character back to life), but powers are certainly allowed to toe the line eg healing, powers involving undeath, immortality, pausing or manipulating time.

aside from that, anything goes. you could get plain old superstrength, but you could also get the ability to create dogs with your mind. other not quite rules, more guidelines are that supers are immune to their own powers hurting them (unless they were pushing themselves too hard), although the way the imminuties occur may be inconvinient to the super.

while some powers may be 'more powerful' than others, powers dont really get to be way underpowered or overpowered in comparision to others. sure being able to talk to animals may feel a bit useless compared to someone who can lift 4 tanks at once, but nobodys going to end up with a power like 'can turn into a goose but only once' or 'can grow toenails twice as fast' or 'if i sneeze i can change my hair colour'. at the same time, youre not going to get someone with the power to snap their fingers and level a city, or instantly blow up the moon or whatever.

“Anonymous said to someone-always-cares: I love rami PLEASE tell me his favorite song(s) and why. I will die for you”

a drawing of rami saying out loud “i dont really have any specific favourite song, really? i just listen to whatever sounds catchy and then listen to that on repeat for hours until i hate it. i guess i do like upbeat songs? ones that make you feel happy even if the lyrics are sad”

“ un1c0rnhh said to someone-always-cares: tell me,,, please,, cam,,, are they a cat person or a dog person?? ily"

theres a drawing of cam a metre away from a cat lying down. she has her arm out and is making ‘psspsspss’ noises at it. end id]

FUCK i am so glad i didnt hand write all of that, it would have been a major pain in the ass to write it all and then have to transcribe all that next. but nope i could directly copy paste the asks and word answers. cheers if anyone made it this far down. if anyone wonders why this is uploaded late, you know now.

"and also that nesryn faliq is one of the funniest characters in the whole series"- FINALLY someone else who appreciates Nesryn! She is so under rated by tog fans

nesryn faliqs greatest hits include:

being able take on an assassin single handed

telling a man, who literally only asked a girl to take her hood off, that she was gonna go tell his wife that he was fucking moron pervert

willing to defend and protect said girl despite literally trying to kill her 24 hours earlier

using her wealth and privilege to get into the overwhelmingly male guard in a racist colonising city to help victims of adarlan and protect immigrant families like hers

chaol: fuck off and die aelin everything is your faultaelin: if i die im absolutely going to haunt you stupid bitch lmao i cant fucking stand younesryn: not to be,,,,,you know,,,,focusing on the TASK AT HAND or anything but theres a guy about to die here?

a wealthy handsome prince is like “I’m in love with you and I want to marry you” and ms faliq is like……could you let me think about it 

on that point, when sartaq says he would take all day and nesryns first response is UH I GOTTA WRITE A LETTER HANG ON

going out to get drunk with the woman her commanding officer used to fuck and currently hates because she thinks he’s being a whiny bitch 

when sartaq and the rukh riders are like “GASP you’re neiths arrow you’re a legend” and nesryns like……. i thought everyone could shoot bullseyes from 12 miles away…. is that not…. a thing….

shooting bullseyes in front of a legion of trained warriors like its not shit and not noticing that they all fall in love with her 

in tower of dawn when the narrative is chaols “aelin is an unholy godless being who uses her uncontrollable power for EVIL and must be contained” and yrenes “that mysterious dangerous stranger who saved me and nearly killed me……..that violent strange young girl….” nesryn faliq sat on a mountaintop in antica and just went “ aelins rlly gna get her dumb  ass murdered someday lmao love that bitch”

when aelins on the warpath after rowan gets injured n QoS and nesryn isn’t fazed and just follows behind her paying the staff like….yes this is my friend aelin…..yes she will kill you shes not kidding…..no shes not really that scary shes a good egg if you.squint a bit…

responding to aelin saying shes with chaol like 

chaol: when i broke things off nesryn wasn’t phased,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,and when i met her again she seemed not to mind that I had,,,,,,left her

nesryn, sipping iced tea: hey…….kale wasn’t it?

no fuss no mess no feelings, just bounced on a man that didnt respect her 

loving her family unconditionally and taking great pride in both countries she feels are home and working to make them better for their citizens

nesryn holding aelins hand when lysandra gets taken in QoS, nesryn bringing rowan clothes despite the fact that chaol her commanding officer doesnt want them to have anything to do with her

find out the Valg exists and gets straight to killing them no room 4 talk kiss this arrow

when aelins like “your a SHIT spy you fucking asshole” and nesryns like “sick well this shit spy has an ARROW pointed at your torso and really wants to let it fly start running bitch”

nesryn questioning authority and actually listening to aelins opinion instead of assuming chaols way is the best way 

actually genuinely caring about the people of adarlan despite the racism and intolerance she faced

actively and continuously  working to help those in need, actually caring about them from a genuine goodness in her soul and not because she wants to make herself feel like a hero and pretend she wasn’t complicit for years :) unlike :) others :) 

being an incredibly loving, thoughtful, joyful character all while having an incredibly reserved and stoic personality and seamlessly combining the two 

nesryn faliq is everything yall want in a character, she’s intelligent, kind, she’s skilful, she holds aelin accountable which is what yall foam at the mouth for, she’s an incredible backstory and her journey throughout a racist country as a woman of colour and her reconnecting with her fathers homeplace is beautiful? she’s independent and has no time for overly romantic displays of affection, which is when yall should be chiming in w ur “yasss my cold queen” or w/ever like u do with manon and nesta

and yet  i cant be 5 minutes on goodreads or on the nesryn tag on this very website without some Scholars either 1) pretending she straight up doesn’t exist 2) ignoring the fact that her journey and character are more than the white man who treated her badly and subsuming her role in the story to just chaols romantic interest 3) saying nesryn is problematic for leaving chaol in antica to do her fucking job 4) calling her boring like you don’t have a blog dedicated to the two flakiest pieces of white bread in the gd books 

derailed this totally lmao sorry you were being so nice ! so basically id die for nesryn faliq i agree :)

Yay requests are open again! Could I request some Reader76 where Jack and reader were together before the fall and after all the shit goes down reader thinks Jack is dead and when the recall happens they meet again except reader doesnt recognize him as 76 and reader is all like "wow this 76 guy is such an ass i cant stand him who does he think he is!" and they constatly butt heads and general sassyness shananigans :3

Ravages of Time

“I can see you haven’t been sleeping, Jack.”

Soldier: 76 stiffens. He swears Ana’s skill as a sniper granted her the ability to see through steel itself. As though she could read his thoughts, she chuckles heartily.

“I can see it in your shoulders, you can’t fool this old eye.”

She takes her place beside him by the guardrails overlooking the sea on the Watchpoint. The sun is fast fading, heralding the end of a hectic day and the beginnings of another restless night.

Soldier: 76 sighs. “It shouldn’t have been like this,” he rasps, clearly pained.

Ana hums contemplatively, willing him to continue. The chilly breeze tousles their hair and its whistle fills the silence between them. Soldier: 76 takes in a breath, steeling himself for a story he isn’t sure he is ready to tell.

The man leans against the railing. “It was my fault. I tried to interfere where I wasn’t wanted.”

Ana nods sagely. “I heard. You took your habibi off the next three missions.”

He sighs again. She could tell he was exhausted, both physically and mentally. “Ex-, Ana. We’re not together anymore.”

She scoffs, humored by the thought. “I do not recall you two breaking up.”

“Then you didn’t hear the conversation.”

It was a scant few hours ago when he heard that you had been assigned to several critical risk missions. The level of danger was high, and the chances of death even higher.

He didn’t even know you were alive until two weeks ago when Winston introduced you to the team. He thought he was finally going to die from a heart attack, seeing you alive and well–he could have sworn you perished in Switzerland. Not a day passed where the patronizing question of ‘what if’ didn’t surface in his mind.

He could still remember the conversation clearly that led to your almost-demise.

“Can we talk?”

You cocked your head to the side, a sign he had your undivided attention. Under your scrutiny, he suddenly felt foolish for even opening his mouth. But he trusted you, and that’s why he forced himself to continue. He slapped the back of his neck, rubbing carefully like he does when he’s nervous.

“Switzerland. I need you to come with me. For…” He gritted his teeth. “For…support. I can’t do this alone anymore. Would you come with me?”

There was a moment of silence where he feared you’d laugh and tell him to stop being silly, that he can do it by himself. But to his immense relief, your eyes softened and you cupped his cheek so gently. Your hand was warm and he couldn’t help but lean into it, holding your gaze steady. “What sort of asshole would I be if I said ‘no’, Commander?”

You slapped him in the shoulder encouragingly, the mild sting it brings was a fierce reminder of your strength–strength he could always count on. “Come on already, let’s get your shit patched up with Gabe already. You’ve both waited long enough.”

You would’ve been an asshole, but an alive asshole. Not that you weren’t now, but he couldn’t have known that. There should have been no survivors. But he survived. Gabriel–Reaper–survived. Wishful thinking had made him hope that you did, too, but you were no super soldier like the two of them. So he didn’t hold his breath–he just held the doors to his heart closed just so he could even sleep at night.

But seeing you those two weeks ago made the pain return full force, almost knocking him to his knees. The doors to his heart slamming open with such intensity, he feared he may never close them again. You were different, more grey in your hair than he remembered, more intense and curt, but it was still you. Time was decidedly unkind to you.

He never knew the full effects of the saying “absence makes the heart grow fonder” until now. You didn’t recognize him–how could you, he was a different man–but he knew it was you right away even beneath the mask you wore, and his heart ached fiercely, his blood singing in his veins, for something it was denied for so long.

But he couldn’t reveal himself–it wouldn’t be fair, he told himself. He could see the way Ana looked at him and how Winston seemed eager for something to happen. There was Jesse, who definitely gave him a side-eyed glance, and there was an awkwardness that surrounded you both when you shook hands whereas you’d tackle him with a warm hug in the past.

It only made him irritated. At himself, mostly. The obvious attention everyone else was giving him didn’t help either.

It was even worse when you declared icily during your introduction, “I’m just here to finish what Jack started.”

It was all his fault, he supposed, and he resolved the fix that. What he wouldn’t give to rewind time just so he could find you again right after the blast–even before it and tell you that he was mistaken, he doesn’t need any support, he can handle these discussions alone and spare you a life of pain. A pang of guilt would strike him with dizzying force whenever he notices something about the way you’ve aged: the small limp in your step that you do your best to hide (he can hear the unevenness); the shaking of your hand when it was free; the small box of tools you kept on your person that looked like it’s been very well used.

But unless he managed to convince Tracer to do some interference, all he could do now was to make sure that this time you didn’t die on his watch and to keep his distance. He owed you that much. It was unfortunate that you didn’t see it that way especially after you found out how he went about ensuring your safety.

“Agent 76,″ you called out. He did not budge when you stomped toward him and put yourself in his face–under previous circumstances, he would’ve been inclined to lean in closer, but now, that would be far from appropriate. “What do you think you’re doing?”

“What do you mean?”

He could tell you knew he was feigning innocence, and you weren’t buying it. You crossed your arms over your chest, regarding him shrewdly behind the mask. “Listen. Just because I just answered the recall doesn’t give you a right to remove me from those missions.”

Ah. You found out much faster than he thought you would (he should’ve remembered not to underestimate your thoroughness from experience), but the fact that you haven’t yet started kicking his ass yet meant that you were going to give him a chance to explain himself.

Like hell he will.

“Those missions were wrongfully assigned to you. You weren’t ready for them.” He almost winced at the boldness of his own lie.

Slowly, like a mother leading a child, you spoke carefully, “Agent 76, I am not a child. I am old enough to retire. Just because you possess more grey than me doesn’t mean that you have the right to control me. Do you understand me?”

“I’m not trying to control you–”

“Then what do you call vetoing the missions that I was assigned to and accepted?” you whispered.

A pang of guilt made him want to shrink, but he held fast. “According to your profile, you haven’t been on the field in too long. You need to work your way up.”

You barked a laugh. Shit, that laugh made his back prickle–you were annoyed. “Excuse you, old man! I’m not spring chicken, but I was former Overwatch–not even the Strike Commander himself could beat my ass without going full strength.” You smacked the back of your hand against his chest. “What the fuck would you even know about missions being for me or not?”

Damn, he forgot how strong your strikes were.

‘It’s all in the wrist,’ you’d used to say as you playfully backhanded his shoulder to demonstrate. Even with his SEP enhancements and accelerated healing, it still left a mark.

You whipped a finger to his face in warning.

“You may have answered Recall faster than me, but that doesn’t mean that it makes you the fucking boss of me. Got that, soldier boy?”

God, you didn’t have to tell him that–of course he knew, he knew better than anyone else just how strong you were even in the face of adversity. But at the same time, it’s because he knew you that he had to do this.

You may think you hide it well, but he doesn’t miss the way your arm seizes right after the gun recoils during the demonstration you give them to prove that you’ve still got what it takes to be Overwatch; he isn’t able to see through your mask, but he had been with you long enough to know you were in pain even after you take a victory pose among a heap of broken training bots. It was an impressive sight made no less so by Solider: 76′s knowledge of your pain.

“Speak for yourself,” he rebutted. It may not have been the right thing to say, but he was just looking out for your well-being. “I am in charge of team compositions. If I don’t think you should be on a mission, you’re out. It’s for your own good.”

He can tell your face has twisted up into a deep scowl that he desperately wishes he could see so that he can kiss it away, but balls his hands into fists to stop.

Finally, you spat out, “You’re a real piece of work, you know that?”

He knows. “When you prove yourself, then we’ll reconsider it.”

“You guys don’t have enough people to be picky about this, 76.”

Yes, that’s another thing he knows, but knowing that, he still needed to protect you. “Prove yourself first, then we’ll talk.”

Your shoulders pulled back, and your whole stance stiffened. Mentally, he braced himself for a blow or another harmless (but painful) slap to the chest. But you didn’t. Instead, you growled, annoyed.

“Fine. Fine.” You threw up your hands. “You don’t want another asset on your team, fine. Have it your way, Commander. Go fuck yourself.”

It was unbelievable how much it stung to hear you say his title so sarcastically when he was used to it being used as a term of endearment. Before he could even recover from the stinging verbal blow, you were gone, uneven steps now more obvious than ever echoing in the hall.

He had let you go. Foolishly. 

“So you’re going to leave it like that, Jack?” Ana asks softly. 

Soldier: 76 let out a heavy sigh, shoulders sagging. He almost didn’t have the strength to lift his head and just let it hang pathetically. He never did like fighting with you. And knowing that it was his fault that you were even doing this only made him feel worse.

“I don’t know, Ana. I was…”

The words die in his mouth, leaving an imaginary bitterness he could almost taste. He was what? Foolish? Just trying to protect you? He didn’t know. The sun has long gone down, leaving the two old soldiers in the cold and misery of Jack’s memories.

Ana gives him a sympathetic pat on the shoulder. “No matter how long it’s been, not everything is lost, Jack. Go, it’s not too late.”

He has almost half a mind to refute that because it’s been a decade and he’s hurt you much more than he could ever make up for, but the look she gives him is solemn and sympathetic. He’s suddenly reminded of the explosive argument she had with Fareeha after their first meeting in over a decade, and the cookies that the two shared just last week, and he is forced to reconsider.

It really might not be too late, but he doesn’t know if he has the strength to tell you the truth. Not when you were his strength all along.

This was a little rushed, but I just–OW. That prompt hurt. I couldn’t help but keep going on and on. 

Teaser dump! Because I am an incredibly slow writer and want to give tumblr followers some sort of little boon for being cool and following me here

its a long post cause im teasing like 5 or 6 stories here. if the readmore doesnt work on mobile lemme know and I’ll try and fix it.

1 rule- no reposting anywhere please. these are teasers for the next parts of fics i’ll put up once i get them to a postable state. some of them i want to fully complete before breaking into chapters so you guys dont have to wait as long for updates, others I just got stalled out on and havent made progress in weeks.

theyre all VLD or FMA in here. I have a few ideas jotted down for Natsume too but havent gotten them started. I also just caught up on the new season and want to rewatch it some to get better characterization for some of the others.

Post Immunization pt2 FMA

“Brother? Brother, I know you’re tired, but you can’t sleep in the car any more.” Ed swiped his hands over his face. Everything felt warm and foggy except for the splitting headache he had and a rather uncomfortable heaviness in his arm pulsing low pain up his good shoulder. In short, not the nicest thing to wake up to. He mumbled out a jumbled mess of what he thought to Al.

“I know it isn’t very nice brother, but you don’t have to swear at me about it.” Ed shrugged, continuing to swipe the cool metal of his automail over his face as he let his flesh arm fall back to rest between him and the seat. Alphonse reached over the seat between himself in the back and his brother to nudge at Edward and disrupt him from curling back up and sleeping again. “We stopped and got dinner, and you might prefer being inside overnight, the military parking lot isn’t a proper place to sleep.”

“Don’t leave me in the parking lot,” Ed’s forehead creased and he took on a whining tone. “Geeze what kind of asshole-“

“If you get out now, you won’t have to go back to the parking lot. If I knew you’d prefer sleeping in a car over my oh so generous offer I really would have let you, you know.”

“That kind of asshole then.” Ed rolled himself up to sitting, bracing a hand on his aching head. A shiver quaked across his shoulders as he stumbled out into the evening air.

Turnabout Is Fair Play pt3 VLD

“Is he okay?”

“What do you think made that happen so quickly?”

“Is Lance going to be in bed all day?”

“Guys,” Shiro held up his hands, pleading. He pointed to the pathetic spread on the table, “Eat first. I don’t want us all neglecting ourselves when our energy needs to be there.”

They all sat and pulled hot cups over to themselves and rooted through the breakfast offerings. Pidge grabbed some sort of chip-like snack, Hunk took some of the burned toast and a fruit from the dish, and Keith uncrossed his arms long enough to pull some of the toast to his plate as well. Shiro waited for the crinkling of the packaging to quiet before he spoke.

“It got pretty bad, he was pretty dehydrated from the mission, and I guess between that and his fever… Anyway, he’s doing okay. Still a pretty nasty fever, but its not dangerous and he’s got water and medicine. Still sleeping, last I saw, which is good because it means he is resting and not in distress. I think the plan is going to be that he’ll stay in the med bay area for today. I don’t want you guys sneaking down there until he’s awake and decides he is up for it.”

“He’s okay, for real though?” Hunk was starting to fidget stiffly and uncomfortably.

A prompt that is unnamed as of yet VLD

The plumes of smoke were highly corrosive in nature, from the readouts on screen. Nothing in the atmosphere was welcoming to human life, and while the ocean here was a lovely lavender with waves that would make any surfer stare in stunned silence before rushing in- it was also extremely hostile to their human make up. Not to mention the huge shadows lurking beneath, and the huge scarred fins breaking the surface on occasion.

“You’re all doing wonderfully! There should be a gale of wind coming in from the south side in a few moments,” Coran crackled over the radio. “From my understanding this isn’t quite the ‘parasailing’ experience, but it is a much more advantageous training method for us!”

Even with their suits, the Lions, and all the careful planning and advanced technology, the stench of the volcano seeped into the cockpit of each Lion. Pidge was coughing harshly, trying to mute their line each time to spare the others. That tea from earlier had done wonders, for a while. But the acrid atmosphere, even if it was filtered well and none of the harmful particles were coming in, was so strong smelling it woke up the scratchy burning pain from earlier.

“Pidge! On your 7!” Hunk shouted during one of the coughing fits taking hold of Pidge. Below the green Lion the ground was starting to crack from the volcanic pressure and seeping smoke.

Pidge grabbed the controls with one hand, the other held in front of their helmet in reflex. One handed- they jerked Green out of the danger zone as the ground split and shot up hot vapors and flecks of molten minerals and bits of charcoaled vegetation still clinging to the surface. It wasn’t a pretty dodge by any means, but it did the job. The turn ended a little roughly, and Pidge was slammed into the side of the pilot seat, but other than that they were fine. Pidge took a deep breath after the fit subsided.

“Thanks Hunk-“ They cleared their throat before realizing the comm was still off. Pidge flicked it back on before repeating, “Thanks Hunk. Saved my tail there, literally.” Green flicked her tail around to show her thanks as well.

Ed Whump 2 Electric Boogaloo (working title will be changed) FMA

Upon arriving at the Hughes' residence, Gracia gasped, dropping the doll she had been holding when the door opened to show the two of them. Dirt caked and bandaged as Ed was, the Colonel was also battleworn, clothing torn in some places and with the dust of alchemic reactions stuck to his face and uniform. Elicia was still off on the background, her happy little voice filtering through the open door.

"Sorry to show up in such a sorry state," Roy gave her a lopsided grin. "I do not intend to impose, but I can't speak for the brat."

Ed swatted at the hand Roy had used to gesture in his direction. Throughout the walk Ed's energy flagged further, and he was left panting and speechless. He resorted to short, snapped comments and commands or simply swatting lightly at Roy with the automail. They had to stop a few times, even going as far as sitting down for twenty minutes on a bench after a stumble that caused Ed a hot flash of pain that left him nauseated. His bruised ribs were not making the trek easier.

"Oh, nonsense. Ed and Alphonse never impose," She gave Ed a smile. It seemed lost on him, he was trying to catch his breath and avoid pain at the same time. His eyes were glassy and he was sweating slightly. The fever the doctor had warned about was visible on his pink cheeks by now as well. "Come on in."

"Thank you," with that, she stepped aside and Roy walked in with Ed following. Mustang casually undid his jacket and hung it on the hook and respectfully undid his shoes and set them to the side.

Ed stomped on the heel of his boots and tugged his feet from them, bracing himself on the wall with his automail hand. That accomplished, he pushed them with his foot to the side and left them in a heap. Ed carefully worked his jacket off his injured shoulder and let it slide off his automail arm to the floor. Roy leaned down to pick it up after Ed gave it a half-hearted kick to try and fling it on top of his boots.

Ed Whump-in-progress 1  FMA

He grabbed a seat, kicking his feet up to rest on the edge of the seat across so he could use his legs as a tale to hold his journal. While they were in transit, he and Al may as well go over what they’ve learned so far to see if they may be able to gather anything while on this assignment.

The Elric brothers drifted into their own world going over their notes, and the rest of the group climbed aboard and the train started in motion after everything and everyone was accounted for.

Edward’s attention turned further away from his meal and their current destination as he and Alphonse nit-picked over small details and things they had learned through their travels so far, and soon found himself getting uncomfortable on the hard seat. Slowly the sounds of the rest of the military group in the cab trickled into his awareness, and he zoned out to a game of cards Falman and Furey had been playing together.

“Ah, they return to the world outside of alchemy. You guys excited for this?” Breda  was leaning over the seat ahead of theirs, watching them seemingly oblivious to everything as they hummed and hawed over their research.

“Yes, as much as I can be. I am really thankful that Colonel Mustang is allowing me to ride along. I understand its a really big favor,” Alphonse rubbed at the back of his helmet. “I’m very sure brother is thankful for it as well. We have a lot to go over.”

“Yeah.” Ed leaned back, wondering when he started feeling so exhausted. “He’s not being an ass about it, surprisingly.” He stared out the window for a few minutes, zoning out again. The sky was changing to a dusky purple, and with belated interest he noted the wall lamps lighting up. The motion of the train was adding to his exhaustion, making it hard to keep his eyes open. 

Alphonse encouraged his brother to sleep, and kept himself occupied joining the others in card games and listening to the stories they told. Edward rested his head against the glass, drifting off as the kilometres flew by. Hours passed and Alphonse found himself awake alone after a while. He watched his brother sleep, fitfully at times, with his forehead pressed to the glass leaving a foggy halo. He read some to pass the time, some notes and parts of the lighter novels he had started. 

Ed stirred eventually, stretching his legs forward with a groan. His eyes opened and he blinked a few times before registering Alphonse across from him.

“Mornin’ Al,” he mumbled checking the horizon. The dark sky dotted with pinprick stars drifted by behind the speeding scenery. “Can you open the window for a bit? ‘S hot in here.” 

“You can sleep more, brother.” Alphonse stood as quietly as he could to crack the window as his brother ran his hands over his face, shuddering as he tried to hold back a yawn. Ed nodded, seeming to miss the words entirely as he sat up straighter and stretched a bit more.

“In a bit,” he swallowed, “weird dreams. Its kinda stifling in here, could use the air.” Ed pulled his legs up onto the seat. He felt so sore, how long had it been? He searched his pockets for his watch.  

just in case this goes missing

This is my manifesto

That beautiful morning, i hadnt gotten any sleep that night because i was up ranting about OCCULTISM and rape and dug abuse. When my friend, Quaint, showed up he was shaking and his lips were an off shade of grey. He asked to use my phone and called his mama saying that he might go to hospital today because he felt sick. I told him that he wasnt sick he was just DTing and needed alcohol to subdue the effects on his body. I walked to go get medicinal whiskey but the liquor store wasnt open. I walked to the whole foods and picked up 2 bottles of wine and some doggo treats for his dog, chance. He didnt want the treats i gave him but he was such a good protector of his friend. We passed the wine around, casually outside of the unopened shop. 

THEYASKEDME IF WAS SEEIN OR HEARING ANYTHING

It was Monday morning (Mid December 2019) when i had contact with the first officer in front of an establishment called “The Love of Ganesha” on Haight St in San Francisco. I dont remember his badge name or number but he was a well groomed caucasian male. He approached me because he had gotten a call that morning about disorderly conduct (or something along those lines) he arrived at the scene, harrassed my surrounding family, and moved them down the line. After everyone had moved he approched me and Threatened to detain me for being under the influence or for being crazy or something like that. He told me he was taking me to the SF psychiatric ward. I asked him what he was detaining me for. I asked him again what he was detaining me for. He approached my husband and asked Sean if he knew me and if he could help me move me belongings and myself to another location. My stuff was in dissarray but we moved down to the corner of haight and ashbury where my husband sean took and long nap (we were up the entire night before)

My friends and i spent most of the day on that corner, playing with our kitties and talking to touring adults. Around sundown,shortly after a woman donated several dogbeds, my good friend Caveman approached the corner and put down his belongings. Seconds later a squad car with flashing lights pulled up to the scene and two officers of the law got out. One of them was a young african american male and the other was a (assumed to be) younger asian american male. The asian american male (we’ll just call him “woodstick”) “Woodstick” immediatly addressed caveman by asking him “how is your son” whih i thought was very rude. But then “woodstick” told everyone that they had to leave “his” corner. (im pretty sure he doesnt pay rent on that corner but anyway) as me and my husband packed up our belongings “woodstick” got out his big wooden stick and wore it on his hip like a Gun. I wasnt threatened but everyone else, all fed up with the harrassment, moved along. 

I stayed up all night that night talking my husband’s ear off and crying. I fell asleep shortly but was woken up by my hyper-sensitive on-guard dog around 4:30 am. So not much later in the morning i got up and even through my husband asked me not to go, i wanted to walk and yell and talk someone els’s ear off. So i took our 3 kittens, (because they were wide awake) and i went to haight st. i sat on my dog’s bed on the corner of haight st and ashbury and made a sign that said I protest this state. For  the sake of my deceased friends:

I screamed that i was being raped, I screamed that i was being murdered, i screamed “wake up people” and i screamed “NARCAN call 911 call 911 call 911 i am overdosing on heroin! oh wait thats not what someone who is overdosing on heroin sounds like” I was furiously flipping off everyone and nobody cared. 

Anyway, an african american police officer arrived at the scene, right around 7 am right after shift change i assume (she never mentioned getting a call). She pulled up wto me and said “stand up”, i said “no”, she said “im taking you to jail”, she put on black gloves and got out of her car and asked me politely what the problem is. I explained my situation to her and she politely told me where to go to file a formal complaint against off. “Woodstick” and then when i continued to not comply she gave me a tresspassing 25 ticket. Then she said that because i wasnt leaving “ we were going to have another problem” i told her to contact her SGT. and she did so. A white man arrived at the scene and rudely told me… something (i wasnt listening ) i was also flipping off people as they walked by. So the SGT starts grabbing at me and pushing my hat and other belongings around, almost as if he was trying to piss me off more. Then he grabbed me by my shoulder and so did the african american female officer that had orginally made contact with me. I explained “dont touch me” “stop harrassing me” “i know my rights” (which im not sure i do anymore)Then shorltly another 4 or so officers showed up to the scene and pushed my face into the ground, got one arm behind my back, broke my glasses and they said “stop resisting” multiple times. Then they threatened to take me to jail. They told me my religious artifact would have to be removed and then they forcefully tried to remove my silver and lapiz ring. My figner had already been broken recently so  i knew that my ring wouldnt come off easily. I told the officers that as they FORCEFULLY tried to remove my religious artifact. I mentioned the first amendment to them. They continued to try to remove my ring threatening me with detainment. Then the SFFD showed up and they put me on the gurnie. Forced my right hand. Took my cat’s basket and my dog’s new dog bed that was given to me by that kind woman.

Took me to the Zuckerberg San Francisco General hostpitable where they werent very hospitable. After they laughed at me and made fun of me, they got me a chaplain named mary kay who gave me 2 bibles and another chaplain also named mary talked me through the trauma like a couple of pros. They doctors asked m what was physically wrong and i told them my hand feet and torso and arms hurt. They brought in an xray machine and asked me if i might be pregnant. When i said it was possible they left with the xray machine… never took  a urine sample. While they were xraying my hands i told them that i believed i have a stress fracture inin both of my feet. They never even checked. After being taken to the psych ward (which reeked of county jail) I spoke to a psychiatrist for 5 minutes before they knocked me out witha variety of pills. The next morning i woke up and they gave me my breakfaast (mushroom omlette) and i announced i was doing a hunger strike, drank a cup of coffee. Not long after they allowed me to call my mom. My mother offered to pick me up from the hospital but i told her i wanted to be released on my own recognisance. Not long after they allowed me to shower and leave. 

MY partner, sean, was waiting outside for me and my friend shane came and picked us up.

That evening i bought a pack of PBRs, because it was all i could afford beer wise, and i went to haight st and handed them out to my friends. I put my belonging under a scaffolding to protect it from the cold rain. My friend caveman screamed at me on sight “you are the only other woman to be 5150 from here other than misha” who misha is i dont know.

King and 14th

I scrambled to get to the train station. Screaming the whole way. I begged people to let me use there phone because mine had died. I went into the train station and frantically tried to find money in my purse. An older african american woman approched me and asked me what the problem was and offered to by me a ticket. I stated plain and clear that i would also need a ticket for m partner and she said it would cost her too much. My partner told me to quiet down and payed for his own ticket while she bought me mine. I promptly lost it.

Friday the 13th December

It was raining when my partner got off the BART train. We walked to the closest covered porch and started to unwind. After watching a couple older gentlemen leave the building i assumed that it was a federal building. We went to sleep there. Around 2 am (december 14) in the middle of shift change SGT 8 and OFF 10 woke us up and off. 10 threatened to take me and my husband to jail… or to the hospital… i dont remember exactly what his plan was but he put those stupid blue gloves on. As soon as i started rambling to myself they left. NO CONTACT 

My husband and i got our asses moving and as we walked we started to argue (but not in a “im mad at you and you suck”kind of way but in a “i was exhausted already” kind of way) i told him to stay put after we walked not even half a mile. I walked with my yellow water bottle in hand so that traffic could see me more clearly. I got to the fire house. Rang the doorbell.

Rang the doorbell again, i was quite dehydrated at this point. I used my limited knowledge of morse code to sing S.O.S. and WATER and FIRE and HELP. when i noticed the fire department waking up i motioned at them for water. They laughed and shook their heads or something like that. I was so angry at this point i may have started hallucinating. 

2 cop cars pulled up. 4 lights shone. I put my hands up with my big ol sharpie in one hand and my water bottle in the other. SGT 8 rushed me, snatched the bottle out of me hand, threw it away from me, and put my on the ground and in cuffs. He did not read me any sort of any rights. Anyway he asked me if i was writing on the building or doors. they ran my name. Asked me what the problem is… i told them i was tired and i had just had a fight with my husband. I mentioned the domestic abuse and they said “dont use that word” i told them i needed a ride to the hospital, he said he would only give me a ride if i was under the influence of drugs and shined his BRIGHT ass light in my eyes, practically blinding me. I told him i had smoked weed (a legal substance to consume if you arent operating a motor vehicle) he said i didnt seem high and he was right because the cheap weed i smoked barely did anything anyways. So i mentioned the water thing again after they allowed me to sit on their bumper (so polite) i asked them for their badge numbers and the ten (more like a seven but he’s a cop there is only so far you can get with that) said he was 10 and the four told me he was 8. Brisbane PD. where there is no hospital apparently. So they confirmed that i was being transported and he said hed give me a ride to square one. And one water bottle when i got out. Then he told me hed give me two water bottles which was great because i was REALLY fucking thirsty at that point. And then in the privacy of his cruiser he said “my water bottle is just like your water bottle except my bottle is full and yours is empty” which i thought was pretty offensive but i didnt say anything. So SGT 8 drops me off at the gas station (which wasnt the federal building that i woke up at that morning but details are so 19th century) and puts my water bottle and a new sealed water bottle on the curb of the gas station. Takes my cuffs off, probably said some fuck shit. And said “anything else” and as they got into their cars i said “oh yes and i am in fear of hurting myself AND OTHERs”

And i walked.

And i screamed

And i cruised by my sleeping darling and i wrote a little happy face on the lid of the bottle and i left it for him and i walked some more and when i was out of ear shot of him i whistled. I SCREAMED and i banged my bottle against a pole. I took out my lipstick and i drew a heart on a sign. I drew my signature (MAD (mutually assured desrtuction) read it in HS kinda liked the ring to it) and i walked and i screamed some more. I heard owls in the trees. I saw two men in the trees one had a light in his hand and they stood patiently. I said “hello?” and i heard one of them say “what?”

Later on after eating and getting some fluids in me i am back at the Brisbane fire department and i rang the doorbell once. A young beautiful woman comes to the door and i told her i needed medical attention

Giovanini Gomez asked me what i wanted #1 asked me what he could do for me. 

They gave me a psychotic break and a whole season of episodes and then asked me what they could do for me. Then told me very rudely to get out of town.

So i did

JUST INCASE IT GOES MISSING

This is my manifesto

That beautiful morning, i hadnt gotten any sleep that night because i was up ranting about OCCULTISM and rape and dug abuse. When my friend, Quaint, showed up he was shaking and his lips were an off shade of grey. He asked to use my phone and called his mama saying that he might go to hospital today because he felt sick. I told him that he wasnt sick he was just DTing and needed alcohol to subdue the effects on his body. I walked to go get medicinal whiskey but the liquor store wasnt open. I walked to the whole foods and picked up 2 bottles of wine and some doggo treats for his dog, chance. He didnt want the treats i gave him but he was such a good protector of his friend. We passed the wine around, casually outside of the unopened shop. 

THEYASKEDME IF WAS SEEIN OR HEARING ANYTHING

It was Monday morning (Mid December 2019) when i had contact with the first officer in front of an establishment called “The Love of Ganesha” on Haight St in San Francisco. I dont remember his badge name or number but he was a well groomed caucasian male. He approached me because he had gotten a call that morning about disorderly conduct (or something along those lines) he arrived at the scene, harrassed my surrounding family, and moved them down the line. After everyone had moved he approched me and Threatened to detain me for being under the influence or for being crazy or something like that. He told me he was taking me to the SF psychiatric ward. I asked him what he was detaining me for. I asked him again what he was detaining me for. He approached my husband and asked Sean if he knew me and if he could help me move me belongings and myself to another location. My stuff was in dissarray but we moved down to the corner of haight and ashbury where my husband sean took and long nap (we were up the entire night before)

My friends and i spent most of the day on that corner, playing with our kitties and talking to touring adults. Around sundown,shortly after a woman donated several dogbeds, my good friend Caveman approached the corner and put down his belongings. Seconds later a squad car with flashing lights pulled up to the scene and two officers of the law got out. One of them was a young african american male and the other was a (assumed to be) younger asian american male. The asian american male (we’ll just call him “woodstick”) “Woodstick” immediatly addressed caveman by asking him “how is your son” whih i thought was very rude. But then “woodstick” told everyone that they had to leave “his” corner. (im pretty sure he doesnt pay rent on that corner but anyway) as me and my husband packed up our belongings “woodstick” got out his big wooden stick and wore it on his hip like a Gun. I wasnt threatened but everyone else, all fed up with the harrassment, moved along. 

I stayed up all night that night talking my husband’s ear off and crying. I fell asleep shortly but was woken up by my hyper-sensitive on-guard dog around 4:30 am. So not much later in the morning i got up and even through my husband asked me not to go, i wanted to walk and yell and talk someone els’s ear off. So i took our 3 kittens, (because they were wide awake) and i went to haight st. i sat on my dog’s bed on the corner of haight st and ashbury and made a sign that said I protest this state. For  the sake of my deceased friends:

I screamed that i was being raped, I screamed that i was being murdered, i screamed “wake up people” and i screamed “NARCAN call 911 call 911 call 911 i am overdosing on heroin! oh wait thats not what someone who is overdosing on heroin sounds like” I was furiously flipping off everyone and nobody cared. 

Anyway, an african american police officer arrived at the scene, right around 7 am right after shift change i assume (she never mentioned getting a call). She pulled up wto me and said “stand up”, i said “no”, she said “im taking you to jail”, she put on black gloves and got out of her car and asked me politely what the problem is. I explained my situation to her and she politely told me where to go to file a formal complaint against off. “Woodstick” and then when i continued to not comply she gave me a tresspassing 25 ticket. Then she said that because i wasnt leaving “ we were going to have another problem” i told her to contact her SGT. and she did so. A white man arrived at the scene and rudely told me… something (i wasnt listening ) i was also flipping off people as they walked by. So the SGT starts grabbing at me and pushing my hat and other belongings around, almost as if he was trying to piss me off more. Then he grabbed me by my shoulder and so did the african american female officer that had orginally made contact with me. I explained “dont touch me” “stop harrassing me” “i know my rights” (which im not sure i do anymore)Then shorltly another 4 or so officers showed up to the scene and pushed my face into the ground, got one arm behind my back, broke my glasses and they said “stop resisting” multiple times. Then they threatened to take me to jail. They told me my religious artifact would have to be removed and then they forcefully tried to remove my silver and lapiz ring. My figner had already been broken recently so  i knew that my ring wouldnt come off easily. I told the officers that as they FORCEFULLY tried to remove my religious artifact. I mentioned the first amendment to them. They continued to try to remove my ring threatening me with detainment. Then the SFFD showed up and they put me on the gurnie. Forced my right hand. Took my cat’s basket and my dog’s new dog bed that was given to me by that kind woman.

Took me to the Zuckerberg San Francisco General hostpitable where they werent very hospitable. I spoke to a psychiatrist for 5 minutes before they knocked me out witha variety of pills. The next morning i woke up and they gave me my breakfaast (mushroom omlette) and i announced i was doing a hunger strike, drank a cup of coffee. Not long after they allowed me to call my mom. My mother offered to pick me up from the hospital but i told her i wanted to be released on my own recognisance. Not long after they allowed me to shower and leave. 

MY partner, sean, was waiting outside for me and my friend shane came and picked us up.

That evening i bought a pack of PBRs, because it was all i could afford beer wise, and i went to haight st and handed them out to my friends. I put my belonging under a scaffolding to protect it from the cold rain. My friend caveman screamed at me on sight “you are the only other woman to be 5150 from here other than misha” who misha is i dont know.

King and 14th

I scrambled to get to the train station. Screaming the whole way. I begged people to let me use there phone because mine had died. I went into the train station and frantically tried to find money in my purse. An older african american woman approched me and asked me what the problem was bought 

Friday the 13th December

It was raining when my partner got off the BART train. We walked to the closest covered porch and started to unwind. After watching a couple older gentlemen leave the building i assumed that it was a federal building. We went to sleep there. Around 2 am (december 14) in the middle of shift change SGT 8 and OFF 10 woke us up and off. 10 threatened to take me and my husband to jail… or to the hospital… i dont remember exactly what his plan was but he put those stupid blue gloves on. As soon as i started rambling to myself they left. NO CONTACT 

My husband and i got our asses moving and as we walked we started to argue (but not in a “im mad at you and you suck”kind of way but in a “i was exhausted already” kind of way) i told him to stay put after we walked not even half a mile. I walked with my yellow water bottle in hand so that traffic could see me more clearly. I got to the fire house. Rang the doorbell.

Rang the doorbell again, i was quite dehydrated at this point. I used my limited knowledge of morse code to sing S.O.S. and WATER and FIRE and HELP. when i noticed the fire department waking up i motioned at them for water. They laughed and shook their heads or something like that. I was so angry at this point i may have started hallucinating. 

2 cop cars pulled up. 4 lights shone. I put my hands up with my big ol sharpie in one hand and my water bottle in the other. SGT 8 rushed me, snatched the bottle out of me hand, threw it away from me, and put my on the ground and in cuffs. He did not read me any sort of any rights. Anyway he asked me if i was writing on the building or doors. they ran my name. Asked me what the problem is… i told them i was tired and i had just had a fight with my husband. I mentioned the domestic abuse and they said “dont use that word” i told them i needed a ride to the hospital, he said he would only give me a ride if i was under the influence of drugs and shined his BRIGHT ass light in my eyes, practically blinding me. I told him i had smoked weed (a legal substance to consume if you arent operating a motor vehicle) he said i didnt seem high and he was right because the cheap weed i smoked barely did anything anyways. So i mentioned the water thing again after they allowed me to sit on their bumper (so polite) i asked them for their badge numbers and the ten (more like a seven but he’s a cop there is only so far you can get with that) said he was 10 and the four told me he was 8. Brisbane PD. where there is no hospital apparently. So they confirmed that i was being transported and he said hed give me a ride to square one. And one water bottle when i got out. Then he told me hed give me two water bottles which was great because i was REALLY fucking thirsty at that point. And then in the privacy of his cruiser he said “my water bottle is just like your water bottle except my bottle is full and yours is empty” which i thought was pretty offensive but i didnt say anything. So SGT 8 drops me off at the gas station (which wasnt the federal building that i woke up at that morning but details are so 19th century) and puts my water bottle and a new sealed water bottle on the curb of the gas station. Takes my cuffs off, probably said some fuck shit. And said “anything else” and as they got into their cars i said “oh yes and i am in fear of hurting myself AND OTHERs”

And i walked.

And i screamed

And i cruised by my sleeping darling and i wrote a little happy face on the lid of the bottle and i left it for him and i walked some more and when i was out of ear shot of him i whistled. I SCREAMED and i banged my bottle against a pole. I took out my lipstick and i drew a heart on a sign. I drew my signature (MAD (mutually assured desrtuction) read it in HS kinda liked the ring to it) and i walked and i screamed some more. I heard owls in the trees. I saw two men in the trees one had a light in his hand and they stood patiently. I said “hello?” and i heard one of them say “what?”

Sad fic avatar

"Aang... Its not too late.." She whispered. She whispered it with conviction.. But fear mingled with it. As if scared to offend the boy who sat before her. "It is." He growled. He had allowed his hair to grow back out and it sat shaggy and unkempt around his face and shoulders. Stubble had erupted on his chin and the boy seemed paler than usual. A scar the size of his hands trailed down his spine and neck. He sat crosslegged and without a shirt. He seemed go be freezing. Katara gave a sigh and put a blanket over his now tall figure. It was true. Firelord Ozai had take over and killed many. Many all over the continent. Starting with zuko. "Its not your fault." She added hastily. "We were kids, Aang. Kids, and Ill be damned if we anything but." "I was the worlds only hope, Katara. I failed." "Get over yourself." Came a deeply annoyed tone from behind them. Aang hunched his shoulders and his tattoos seemed to glow. He didnt turn to face them. Katara however looked to see Toph leaning into the entrance. She had allowed her hair to take a roguish look and her features seemed to be edgier and sharp. Thick bangs covered her face but not her blank grey eyes. She wore water tribe clothing to blend in, after her family had been killed off. She was the last known beifong to be living. "Toph." Katara whispered hurriedly. She had an edge to her voice, like an icicle. "No, Twinkle toes, listen here. You failed. Okay? Quit sulking about it. The more you do, the more people get killed. We alll failed, Aang. We all did. But that doesnt mean we still cant recover. Zukos dead. Alright? As far as we know we could be next. But dont think for a second we arent going to stay here any longer waiting for you to get over it." Aang only buried his face in his hands. He didnt seem to register the tough spiel thrown at him so suddenly. Katara stood so that she and Toph were face to face. "Toph! For gods sakes! " she muttered. "Its the truth Katara. He may respond to niceness and kindess but the cold hard truth needs to be exercised." She groaned. "Its been far too long." She said and stalked out. Wether Katara would see her waiting patiently outside or practsiing in the caves, she didnt know. "Aang. Please. I know it hurts. More than you know."  Aang gave a snort and finally turned to look at her. His tattoos were a bold electric blue and they glowed on and off. His eyes looked so tired compared to her desperate ones. A grizzly scar had reached across his face. But it did not hinder his handsome deep set features. They enhanced them. "You dont know about pain, Katara. Youve a beautiful family, that hasnt been touched by the fire nation." He said coldly, Her eyes narrowed, an icy blue searched the cold grey ones. "Bullshit, Avatar. Tell that to my father and my mother. Tell that to sokka.." She broke off and looked anywhere but him. Aang widened his eyes and once again buried his face in his hands. "Everything is so fucked up, im sorry Katara. " his eyes turned white and then grey again. "Dont say shit like that. And then.. And then expect the world to hang at your fingertips. Tophs right. But theres more to it then just that. Aang. We were too young.. But.. Times have changed. Our appearances have changed. We can overtake the firelord." "H-how.." He stuttered. "We can infiltrate and change towns over to our favor. Aang.. Its been 4 years.. 4 years.. And.. And.. I can feel, that its gonna be different this time.. I know it." "Katara im so tired. Everyone hates me now." "Get over yourself. I dont hate you, Toph doesnt hate you." "Wow gee." "Get up."  Fear crossed his features. "Im.. Im not gonna try again." "We need the current avatar Aang. You cant just hand over your avatar powers." Aang groaned. He stood up and could barely. The snow hut they were in was pretty tiny compared to his height now. They both stepped outside. He grabbed his old nomad top and tucked it into his watertribe pants. Katara moaned, Toph wasnt there waiting.  "We need to go get Toph. If shes right and you havent exercised your bending, youre probably pathetic." She said this so matter of factly aang actually kind of grinned. So they set off on foot, for Appa had been taken by the firenation once again. He carried his old staff but it was dwarfed by now. As they walked he could not help but notice again how breath takingly beautiful she was. Her brown hair flowed effortlessly behind her in a braid and her features were soft and determined at the same time. Her icy blue eyes seemed dimmer now that they were in the snow storm. Time had had an effect on all of them. Not that there were many anymore. Most had fled into hiding, turned themselves over to firenation cells, been slaved, worked undercover for the cause or had died. He shivered. He had failed. And yet he wasnt dead. They arrived in an hour to see Toph had taken refuge in a cave by the southern water tribe village. She was working on her technique where she tried to earthbend by just using her fingers or eyes. It was going great. She had managed to move a rock the size of a small dog two inches off the ground using only her eyes. She was wicked happy about this.  She also seemed to have worked on strength conditioning by her torn muscle. "Ah, if it isnt Katara and the avatar. How nice of you to join us mister avatar." "Cut it out Toph. Weve all fucked up greatly lets get over that. Lets accept it."  Katara strode over to the rock pot of cold leopard penguin soup. "Im sorry Toph. Ive been a huge pile of shit. Can you forgive me?" "Forgive? For what? I was never angry with you, you big dumb airhead. Sulking pisses me off. But.. Its also human... So.. Yeah." "You both.. Ready? I mean.. For whats... To come?" "Its not like we have anywhere to turn to, that money cant buy and that isnt haunted." "My whole village is melted. Literally." Katara remarked sadly from her stool.  "Join the club." Toph sneered. "Im sorry." "Quit apologizing and eat. Eat and fill your skinny bones out. We have training after this." Even though the world was being conqured and maimed, toph had still managed to make Aang smile. "How do you know im skinny. I could be humongous for all you know." "The vibrations under your feet dumbass." He laughed and Katara kind of giggled. He ate with difficulty. Not because of its tastlessness (he was famished.) but because he really didnt intend on caring for himself too often.. Since.. Since.. "Sokka wouldve loved this soup. Full of meat." "Hes not dead." Katara's eyes watered. "Hes been put into custody and forced to haul wood for the flameymen." "We will get him back Katara its my fault hes in there." "Quit that." "What?" "Blaming yourself for every little thing." "Al-alright.. Alright.." He said. "This is depressing. Aang Katara follow me. We need to train. If we are gonna kick some firenation ass, we need to train ours off." She turned the soup into sand and took the seats out from under them both, Aang being rusty was caught offguard. "I was right. Youre pathetic. Get up." He obeyed. Later on they were very very tired and sore. Aang had a black eye and a swollen lip. "Geez Toph." He moaned. "First things first. Its master toph because even though youve had an additional four years to hone your skills, youve basically sulked it away. You even let your hair grow out." "I can still do it!" He yelled indignantly. "Do and bend are two different things." He flushed a deep scarlet. "Aang tighten up your stance you need to face the fucking rock or it will pummel you! Now!" She yelled and hurtled a rock his way. He slapped his hands together and concentrated. The rock collided with his hands and groud itself into sand and it flowed around his body before he turned it into a huge rock and sent it back again. She stopped it inches away from her face and returned it to the earth. "Not half as bad as yesterday," "Thanks!" He said excitedly. "Did i say good?!" She shouted and sixty pointed rocks pinned Aang to the wall. "Okay, now metal bending. Remember when we departed four years ago and i was captured? Well metal is just rock. Just wayyy more purified." He condensed the rock under aangs fire. It turned into metal and bent to tophs will. "Wow, okay let me try." He touched it and it immediately dented. He bended it in about 6 minutes tops. "Ha, ha beginners luck." After a week Aang had atoned for a years worth of training. But there was still kataras water bending basics again. They were both right, just because he could still manipulate the element, didnt mean he had a gritty understanding if he were to be born into them. Air was still his element, he understood air as he did his own mind, so pretty and very well. Air would not hurt him. It flowed freely into his lungs and made him light on his feet. Air was mastered. "Aang. You need to feel the water trickle through your veins." "I know.. Im just a little shaky," "Damn right your shaky. That isnt flowing its like fire." By the time a month had passed he was feeling the element very well. He could get down into the earth element by feeling all his apprehension and tension release and combine to move the earth. He could feel water by letting his fear and anxiety calm the stream and in turn it helped him. It helped him feel more than just dead. Fire and air were still his best elements by far. Fire was easily done now adays. Because he was so angry and all the pent up rage against the firenation was fused into his attacks. He felt he was ready and with alot more training. He would be fierce. "Youre actually getting good." Toph admitted one day when he had managed to lock one of her ankles down to the ground and in turn she had locked his arms down. "You really think so?" "Yeah. I do, twinkletoes." He beamed and undid both of the rocks and flew back to his original stance. He was going to get it all down by the end of the week. By the end of the week he was fighting and kicking and punching with control and firosity all in one. He felt the people in need fill him. And he strengthened because of that. They go and get sokka back. And zukos not dead just hidding out. "Im proud to say youve mastered water, avatar Aang." Katara purred with fondness in her voice. "Really?" He asked blushing. Well, the parts of his face that werent scarred turned pink. "Yeah, youve always been a natural Aang." She admitted. "Y-youre just saying that Katara. Youre the master. Im greatful to have learned so much." Katara opened her mouth to say more but then Toph walked in. "Im not deaf. You two sound like were gonna die very soon. Therll be enough time to coo about eachother. We need to get Sokka back." "Really?!" Katara yelled with tears in her eyes. "Yes, ive got the map. Hes in the boiling rock. Theyve reallly tightened up security around there. We will have to be careful." "I love you both!" She said and grabbed them in a very tight embrace. "Yeah yeah, I miss having sokka around anyways. Aang, youre awesome at earth bending but never as good as me." She conceeded with a grin. "Of course, Master." "We begin travel tomorrow." Aang's gaze hardened and he thoug back to Appa. "We'll get him back Aang." "I just wish id said i loved him alot more.." "Dont worry Twinkletoes. Its gonna be ok.. Zukos gone.. But.. Sokka isnt and i have a very good feeling Appas alive too." The next morning katara, Toph and Aang set off for the boiling rock. "Its in firenation territory. But we can obtain a fleet ship. I know it." "We dont need to. The farther we go on foot, the less cospicious we look. Theres refugees all over now that Ozai's in power." Aang avoided eye contact with anyone they passed on their way to firenation territory. "Aang you need to smarten up. We cant even tell its you. Youre so different from how you were four years ago." "Yeah for one thing, youre taller." "Skinnier, your hair is long." "You HAVE hair. It covers your tattoos." "Youre burnt." Aang only looked up occasionally from now on. They had still taken the liberty of gathering travellers clothes but Aang still kept the nomad shirt under his earth nation vest. Finally after a week they reached fire nation borders. "That wasnt as exhausting as I thought it would be." "Its only smooth sailing from here." They explored more and more of the firenation within days. Finally Katara reported back that she had discovered the boiling rock prison in a volcano. "They werent kidding, were they?" "Back when we were together.. Sokka mentioned something about this place." "Your father." "Yeah." At midnight they managed to break into it. Aang pretented to be a earth nation prisoner who had comitted treason of the highest sort. Katara and Toph were both guards. "Bleh, firenation prisons are so bleak.. Good thing im an all nation sort of guy." Katara smiled only a little and Toph snickered. "Eyy! Firemates, get over here! We're kicking some waterbenders!" Aang flinched and Katara froze. Toph gritted her teeth and she and katara moved to the other firenation guards immediately. It was then that Katara came face to face with her long lost brother Sokka. He was older mature looking and had a sunken face obviously to malnutrition. His frame was still lean and lanky. He was taking the beating but he was closing his eyes. His hair has been cut short and his neck and body had sustained war prints and tattoos and scars. He had stubble on his neck and jaw. "Watertribe scum, a guy named Sokka. Lucky we caught him. Took his little gadgets too. Aint no bender are you boy? He dont even resist." "Ah, he used to. But we broke him. We always break them." "Stop!" Katara whispered fiercely. Aang and Toph widened their eyes. They all stopped but one of the guards spit on him. "I need to take this prisoner at once. Hes been very very naughty to me." The fireguards smirked and kicked him in the ribs to where she stood. "Take 'im treat him very nicely. And by nice i mean harshly. Just a little gift, huh sokka!" Katara gave Toph the 'stay here look'. Then forgot she could not see. She finally looked Aang in the eyes and he understood. She stared at her long lost brother, whom she had not seen since four years before. She finally grabbed his shirt collar and with little help from sokka, had managed to stand up. He wobbled a bit and when taking more than a few steps, he stumbled. She noticed that he had a limp to his once stride. He closed his shadowed eyes when he walked. Head down, as if in defeat. Finally they got to an empty cell room. She unlocked the door with the chain of keys and shoved him in there. Carefully she slid the door closed and switched on the lights. "Sokka..." She whispered breathlessly. She had pronounced his name right and he glanced up. His dim blue eyes scanned her and then he shuddered, curling his legs up to his chest. "Please... Dont touch me.. all the guards like to." He muttered with fear. Katara brought a hand to her aching chest. She slid off the helmet and Sokka gasped. Her beautiful soft brown hair was tied in a ponytail and her bright blue eyes were the same as he remembered them. "Katara!" He shouted. The blue fire returned fiercely in his eyes, and finally... Finally.. She recognized him. "I thought you were dead!" He said hoarsely and fast, as if he hadnt used his voice in weeks. "No sokka, im not." She crossed the last steps and embraced her brother. "Oh.... Man... I love you Katara! Ive missed you.. Ive missed you so much.." He said it fast. "I love you too.. Ive spent four years Sokka.. Four years.. When we get you out of here we will catch up." She said with determination. Sokka nodded, he looked weaker then she remembered, fragile. But, one look at his physique proved her wrong. "A couple friends of mine, helped me out with food. I guess when youre an adult, you just need more of it. If you think ive been just sitting here... No.. Ive been waiting." Katara nodded. She reached a hand and touched his face. "They took away my tools. My cool moonsword, my boomerang, my knife.. I cant nessecaerly shave." Katara could only reply with nodding.. It was weird.. She thought he had been dead. "Okay now dont panic.. But they arent going to let us out until you look beaten up." "Katara, four years really does make you a good actor." He ruffled up his out grown hair and added several small bruises and cuts to his face lips and hands. He tussled his clothes and layed down. Katara frowned but didnt say anything. "23.you done in there? Geez, he must have been bad." 29 asked. "Teach you a lesson." Katara growled convincingly enough. Sokka smiled sadly at her and then huddled into himself. She emerged from the room breathing heavily. "Sweet sound of a water freak groaning, I love it. Nice job 23." Katara didnt answer but only nodded. "Aang! Toph! Katara! Oh man i love you guys i missed you guys! Ill never take you for granted again.." He blurted out in a fury.

Southern Charm Recap: Flamingo-ing Crazy

Evening, party people. Smiling faces, beautiful places, welcome back to another week of . Lets see what bat shit craziness this week has in store.

Cameran solidifies her role as the unofficial protagonist of the show, narrating the opening sequence (and even saying the word bitch. Well, I do declare!) My familys about to make fun of me for debasing myself by watching this show for yet another week. Suck it, dad, this shits entertaining and makes me feel like a very accomplished adult in comparison to these 35-year-old train wrecks. On a side note, Im kind of getting into this theme song. As an extra side note, my TV is broken and everything is green tinted, which is fitting, I feel.

We open with Thomas on the phone with JD, the former bitching about Kathryn (what else is new?). He rolls up to JDs house and cant even say yes to a cup of coffee without breaking out the French. Ugh, I thought that was a one-episode thing. Thomas apparently told Kathryn he wasnt cosigning her lease (after the whole polo fiasco, if you’ll recall) and she went so nuts that she ended up IN THE HOSPITAL AND MAY HAVE GONE INTO LABOR PREMATURELY. Jesus fucking Christ. So now, what does Thomas do? He agrees to cosign.

JD is like, wait, so you call Kathryn and tell her youre not cosigning, she gets upset, and now youre cosigning anyway because you feel bad for her

JD: I upset my wife plenty of times when she was pregnant but she didnt end up in the hospital over it.

Thomas is like, Wow, everybody was righthomegirl really does know how to manipulate.

Apparently Jennifer is the ultimate shadester, she used to date Thomas and screenshotted everything and sent it to Kathryn just to stir shit up. Taking it a bit far, don’t you think?

Thomas: If I can handle prison for six months, I can handle this bullshit for two more months.

Hold up, like actual prison or just being with Kathryn? Maybe that random Facebook commenter was right and I do need to go back and watch the show from season 1.

Cameran is one of those white people who answers the phone with, Yello! and we promptly learn she was up all night with diarrhea. Gross. Shep goes to watch Craig turn in his application for the bar exam because hes so full of shit that nobody believes him unless they see it with their own eyes. Thats gotta hurt, Craig.

Shep rolls up to good ol Gentry HQ and asks Craig how business is doing. Craig starts talking about some BS I zoned out pretty quick listening to, something about a bourbon side and a hotel side of something.Damn, and youre not gonna let Landon get in on this bourbon business? Thats cold, Craig.

Craig has one more step to nail before he can take the bar, and if he doesnt complete it in time he wont be able to take the test. I feel a setup coming on

These guys are literally arguing over which type of adhesive Craig should use to affix his passport photos to his application.

Cameran meets up with Danni, the roast thief from the earlier episode, and another friend for lunch. One of their friends orders a sweet tea instead of wine and they all jump on her immediately to ask if shes pregnant. Like…a girl can’t order a damn sweet tea in the middle of the day without everyone assuming she’s got a bun in the oven? Cameron is SO OBVIOUSLY not ready to be a mother and these bitches wont leave her the fuck alone about it. Newsflash: This is 2016! Women can aspire to more nowadays than just being a mother. Leave Cameran alone!

Cameran has anxiety too, she reveals, and this show is becoming one giant therapy advertisement. Just goes to show you, money cant solve all your problems. Spinoff idea: What if they all go to the same therapist? Also, Cam’s friend is like, because thats totally a cure for a legitimate mental illness. WTF is wrong with you. What decade do these people live in.

Only 15 minutes in and my fingers are already tired from all this ranting. Gonna be a long episode. Also, wtf happened to Whitney? Is he still alive?

Its finally (almost) time for the flamingo party. Yay! Patricia will be photographing this party for her entertainment book whcih, Im sorry, Im definitely buying. They’re going to have a ros tower and idk what that is, but I know I want one. Patricia is explaining those champagne tower things where you pour the champagne in the top of the pyramid and it spills into all the ones at the bottom and is like, No its not. Its basically 3D beer pong without the balls. Just chill.

Wait ok the Gentry is a hotel?? I feel like an idiot but if they wouldve just explained this shit at the beginning we wouldnt be here. Anyway, Landon and Craig are prepping for the party and going to a spa.

Landon: Part of being a Southern belle is being well-kept, which makes you a good person.

Yeah, maybe on the outside. Im not convinced any of you except Cameran are good people on the inside. And maybeee Craig. He seems pretty earnest.

Craig is aiming for Gatsby-ish pink in terms of outfit color and Landon is like, Im sorry, bitch what? Don’t be over there acting like your Southern asses did not fucking invent salmon pink shorts as a menswear item. Yeah, you THOUGHT you could insult us Yankees.

Jennifer called Craig to let him know Kathryn literally made herself sick and is in the hospital, and he of course feels super bad for her. Meanwhile, Landon does not give one shit!

Landon: Ugh here we go with the drama. People go to the hospital every day. Calm the fuck down.

Okay, people also die everyday, does that make dying any less shitty?

Landon: Did she really almost die? Doubt it. TTYL, DGAF, going to the spa.

Jennifer tells Craig that Thomas didn’t visit Kathryn in the hospital. This detail is important later, so keep it in mind.

Landon: Im tired of Kathryn controlling and manipulating everyone with this child, Im not gonna be manipulated by this psychopath.

Landon literally thinks Kathryn got a slight headache and rushed to the ER. Not sure if this is warranted or not but I’m semi impressed by the fact that she can’t even pretend to be mildly concerned.

We see Kathryn and she explains she basically gave herself such high blood pressure that it affected the baby. IDK how you can personally know what your own blood pressure feels like unless youre constantly taking it, but ok.

Kathryn: All this baby and I need is a stable place to live in a not-stressful environment and if Thomas wont help me get a huge-ass house he doesnt deserve to be in my babys life as far as Im concerned.

Bonus round: Kathryn manipulates Thomas into helping her move, too.

Kathryn: Cosigning on this house is the least he could do for me at this point. YOU MEAN ASIDE FROM THE LIKE $2500 YOU GET A MONTH? YEAH, I REMEMBER THAT FROM LAST EPISODE, IM NOT A FUCKING IDIOT.

Back at Patricias house where shes still setting up for the flamingo party. God damn, they are milking it.

Patricia: I grew up in the 50s. Mothers wore dresses and high heels and had their hair and makeup done. Ive always maintained you have to put on the dog and try to ge as glamorous as you can.

IDK what putting on the dog means but thats gonna be my next getting ready Instagram caption.

Sligthly disappointed there are no real flamingos at this flamingo party. I was definitely holding out for some exotic birds to be present.

Thomas saying yeah, pop that is the most uncomfortable Ive been all evening, even if they are referring to a bottle of wine.

Thomas is setting Landon up with some dude with a ponytail who I feel like is probably her kryptonite since he seem like the type of dude whod call himself an artist, too. Landon also greets everyone with bonsoir. Can we fucking stop pretending we’re European?

Patricia has a fortune teller at her party. What a rager. I am very sad I did not get an invite. Patricia, if youre reading this, I can clean up really well and I wont get belligerent drunk, which is more than I can say of at least half your guests. Hook a girl up.

This is the first/most weve seen of Whitney in like, two weeks. Some girl said hi to Shep and called him babe and I can see the smoke coming out of Landons ears. OMG JUST HIT ON HIM ALREADY, THIS IS SO PATHETIC TO WATCH.

Craig got Patricia this gaudy flamingo-decorated martini glass and Patricia just HAS to drop that she has 18th-century porcelain. Calm down, Patricia, nobody doubts that you have class. You don’t need to be so ostentatious.

Whitney: Trying to watch Thomas flirt with girls is like trying to watch your horny drunk uncle.

YES. SPOT ON. Somebody give Whitney more screen time!

Cameran shows up poss wasted and with a huge flamingo hat. Cameran is me in college, committing to the theme so hard she doesn’t care if she looks ridiculous.

Five seconds into the party, and Shep is already naked and in the pool. Don’t you know this is a classy affair??

Craig confronts Thomas about Kathryns hospital visit and asks if he saw her. Thomas is likeand Craig is like *sips wine*

Shit-starting Jen may or may not be lying about Thomas not going to visit Kathryn. It’s about to get real.

Craig: One of the reasons Thomas hates Jen so much is because she was supposed to be the fun mistress and wasnt supposed to stick around and meddle in his affairs.

THE PLOT THICKENS. Who can we trust? Nobody, really. Everybodys conniving af. Except Cameran. Im really liking her. Can you tell?

Some girl Bailey asked Landon if she and Shep have ever fucked, or even kissed.

Landon: I’m not gonna lie, theres sometimes I wonder if Shep and I could be in a relationship but I dont wanna risk getting hurt.

Landon. OMG. You are more transparent than every Kardashian PR stunt ever. You clearly wonder ALL THE TIME if you and Shep could be in a relationship, why youre not, when hes going to wake up and realize youre the one for him

Shep gets his fortune told and the fortune teller is like and Sheps like and everyones like Shep is just making a bunch of thats what she said jokes like the mature gentleman he is. Landon, you picked a real winner.

The gay dude who visited Kathryn earlier in the first episode (idk his name, go cross-reference my other recap if you really care that much) pulls Patricia aside to be like

Patricia: I think its very unattractive that hes friends with Kathryn Dennis. Its very low-rent to me. (Yes, she actually used the words “low-rent.”)

Dude whose name I 100% forgot: Its very clear what Patricia sees in Kathryn that she doesnt like: she sees herself.

Patricia calls this dude a knockoff Truman Capote. I gotta say, the South has got their shit-talking on point.

Jen shows up and we already know its going to be good. Thomas is not pleased and calls her a piece of trash. HERE WE GO.

Thomas: Tell this chick Im going to throw her in the pool. JD: You dont need another assault charge, homie.

One things for sure: some type of confrontation is about to go down.

JD is talking about doing another polo match. Jen is likeaka,

Thomas is watching Jen talk to Elizabeth and JD and hes just seething over there. FWIW, Elizabeth seems like a very nice woman. Jen does not, really. Thomas pulls Jen aside.

Thomas: Craig told me you told him I didn’t see Kathryn in the hospital Jen: I meant you didnt stay overnight

Cut to: Jen definitely in plain English saying that Thomas wasnt there at all.

Then Jen criticizes Thomas for only being there for two hours. Like, splitting hairs much? Youre just looking for a reason to shit on him.

Jen: If Thomas is criticizing me for putting Kathryns health at risk, he needs to take a long hard look in the mirror and then go play in traffic.

Thomas: A blind person could see through these lies.

They have a lie vs. misunderstanding argument for like 30 seconds before Thomas tells Jennifer to fuck off.

Jennifer: Im the only friend Kathryn trusts. It would be nice if the father of her kids was the other one.

Thomas thinks its Jens mission in life to wreck his life and make him out to be the enemy.

Jen: Im torn between completely cussing him out and telling him how I really feel, or just feeling sorry for him because hes truly delusional.

AKA how I feel watching this show.

Jens like, and Thomas is like And I’m like:

Patricia is not going to like this argument. Very not luxe.

Just when you think punches are about to fly, they both walk away from the argument. Phew, dodged a bullet. Or like, an assault charge.

JD: Thomas and Kathryn have enough problems, Jennifer doesnt need to add to them. This dams gonna break.

Exciting news tidbit: Thomas pronounces water like wooder.

Whats the first thing Jennifer does after being accused of starting drama? She fucking calls Kathryn from the porch of Patricias house! Whitney is like because his mom has to fight his battles. Everybodys gathered to watch while acting like theyre too classy to watch. Jennifer leaves on her own accord, fuck this show for being anticlimactic AF. I wanted an eviction!

Jennifer: I know what Kathryns going through because now I’m the one nobody likes.

Thomas: I can take a lot. Imprisonment, false political allegations, but do not mess with my family. It’s only okay when I treat Kathryn like shit.

Jennifer leaves yelling and once again this show is so fucking anticlimactic! You built up this party for three fucking episodes and what did we get? A heated argument from which both adults walk away on their own accord, and not even one person gets thrown out? Give me some damn drama, give me a fucking cliffhanger! Come on, Bravo! Do better.

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Source: http://allofbeer.com/2017/05/27/southern-charm-recap-flamingo-ing-crazy/

from All of Beer https://allofbeer.wordpress.com/2017/05/27/southern-charm-recap-flamingo-ing-crazy/

Southern Charm Recap: Flamingo-ing Crazy

Evening, party people. Smiling faces, beautiful places, welcome back to another week of . Lets see what bat shit craziness this week has in store.

Cameran solidifies her role as the unofficial protagonist of the show, narrating the opening sequence (and even saying the word bitch. Well, I do declare!) My familys about to make fun of me for debasing myself by watching this show for yet another week. Suck it, dad, this shits entertaining and makes me feel like a very accomplished adult in comparison to these 35-year-old train wrecks. On a side note, Im kind of getting into this theme song. As an extra side note, my TV is broken and everything is green tinted, which is fitting, I feel.

We open with Thomas on the phone with JD, the former bitching about Kathryn (what else is new?). He rolls up to JDs house and cant even say yes to a cup of coffee without breaking out the French. Ugh, I thought that was a one-episode thing. Thomas apparently told Kathryn he wasnt cosigning her lease (after the whole polo fiasco, if you’ll recall) and she went so nuts that she ended up IN THE HOSPITAL AND MAY HAVE GONE INTO LABOR PREMATURELY. Jesus fucking Christ. So now, what does Thomas do? He agrees to cosign.

JD is like, wait, so you call Kathryn and tell her youre not cosigning, she gets upset, and now youre cosigning anyway because you feel bad for her

JD: I upset my wife plenty of times when she was pregnant but she didnt end up in the hospital over it.

Thomas is like, Wow, everybody was righthomegirl really does know how to manipulate.

Apparently Jennifer is the ultimate shadester, she used to date Thomas and screenshotted everything and sent it to Kathryn just to stir shit up. Taking it a bit far, don’t you think?

Thomas: If I can handle prison for six months, I can handle this bullshit for two more months.

Hold up, like actual prison or just being with Kathryn? Maybe that random Facebook commenter was right and I do need to go back and watch the show from season 1.

Cameran is one of those white people who answers the phone with, Yello! and we promptly learn she was up all night with diarrhea. Gross. Shep goes to watch Craig turn in his application for the bar exam because hes so full of shit that nobody believes him unless they see it with their own eyes. Thats gotta hurt, Craig.

Shep rolls up to good ol Gentry HQ and asks Craig how business is doing. Craig starts talking about some BS I zoned out pretty quick listening to, something about a bourbon side and a hotel side of something.Damn, and youre not gonna let Landon get in on this bourbon business? Thats cold, Craig.

Craig has one more step to nail before he can take the bar, and if he doesnt complete it in time he wont be able to take the test. I feel a setup coming on

These guys are literally arguing over which type of adhesive Craig should use to affix his passport photos to his application.

Cameran meets up with Danni, the roast thief from the earlier episode, and another friend for lunch. One of their friends orders a sweet tea instead of wine and they all jump on her immediately to ask if shes pregnant. Like…a girl can’t order a damn sweet tea in the middle of the day without everyone assuming she’s got a bun in the oven? Cameron is SO OBVIOUSLY not ready to be a mother and these bitches wont leave her the fuck alone about it. Newsflash: This is 2016! Women can aspire to more nowadays than just being a mother. Leave Cameran alone!

Cameran has anxiety too, she reveals, and this show is becoming one giant therapy advertisement. Just goes to show you, money cant solve all your problems. Spinoff idea: What if they all go to the same therapist? Also, Cam’s friend is like, because thats totally a cure for a legitimate mental illness. WTF is wrong with you. What decade do these people live in.

Only 15 minutes in and my fingers are already tired from all this ranting. Gonna be a long episode. Also, wtf happened to Whitney? Is he still alive?

Its finally (almost) time for the flamingo party. Yay! Patricia will be photographing this party for her entertainment book whcih, Im sorry, Im definitely buying. They’re going to have a ros tower and idk what that is, but I know I want one. Patricia is explaining those champagne tower things where you pour the champagne in the top of the pyramid and it spills into all the ones at the bottom and is like, No its not. Its basically 3D beer pong without the balls. Just chill.

Wait ok the Gentry is a hotel?? I feel like an idiot but if they wouldve just explained this shit at the beginning we wouldnt be here. Anyway, Landon and Craig are prepping for the party and going to a spa.

Landon: Part of being a Southern belle is being well-kept, which makes you a good person.

Yeah, maybe on the outside. Im not convinced any of you except Cameran are good people on the inside. And maybeee Craig. He seems pretty earnest.

Craig is aiming for Gatsby-ish pink in terms of outfit color and Landon is like, Im sorry, bitch what? Don’t be over there acting like your Southern asses did not fucking invent salmon pink shorts as a menswear item. Yeah, you THOUGHT you could insult us Yankees.

Jennifer called Craig to let him know Kathryn literally made herself sick and is in the hospital, and he of course feels super bad for her. Meanwhile, Landon does not give one shit!

Landon: Ugh here we go with the drama. People go to the hospital every day. Calm the fuck down.

Okay, people also die everyday, does that make dying any less shitty?

Landon: Did she really almost die? Doubt it. TTYL, DGAF, going to the spa.

Jennifer tells Craig that Thomas didn’t visit Kathryn in the hospital. This detail is important later, so keep it in mind.

Landon: Im tired of Kathryn controlling and manipulating everyone with this child, Im not gonna be manipulated by this psychopath.

Landon literally thinks Kathryn got a slight headache and rushed to the ER. Not sure if this is warranted or not but I’m semi impressed by the fact that she can’t even pretend to be mildly concerned.

We see Kathryn and she explains she basically gave herself such high blood pressure that it affected the baby. IDK how you can personally know what your own blood pressure feels like unless youre constantly taking it, but ok.

Kathryn: All this baby and I need is a stable place to live in a not-stressful environment and if Thomas wont help me get a huge-ass house he doesnt deserve to be in my babys life as far as Im concerned.

Bonus round: Kathryn manipulates Thomas into helping her move, too.

Kathryn: Cosigning on this house is the least he could do for me at this point. YOU MEAN ASIDE FROM THE LIKE $2500 YOU GET A MONTH? YEAH, I REMEMBER THAT FROM LAST EPISODE, IM NOT A FUCKING IDIOT.

Back at Patricias house where shes still setting up for the flamingo party. God damn, they are milking it.

Patricia: I grew up in the 50s. Mothers wore dresses and high heels and had their hair and makeup done. Ive always maintained you have to put on the dog and try to ge as glamorous as you can.

IDK what putting on the dog means but thats gonna be my next getting ready Instagram caption.

Sligthly disappointed there are no real flamingos at this flamingo party. I was definitely holding out for some exotic birds to be present.

Thomas saying yeah, pop that is the most uncomfortable Ive been all evening, even if they are referring to a bottle of wine.

Thomas is setting Landon up with some dude with a ponytail who I feel like is probably her kryptonite since he seem like the type of dude whod call himself an artist, too. Landon also greets everyone with bonsoir. Can we fucking stop pretending we’re European?

Patricia has a fortune teller at her party. What a rager. I am very sad I did not get an invite. Patricia, if youre reading this, I can clean up really well and I wont get belligerent drunk, which is more than I can say of at least half your guests. Hook a girl up.

This is the first/most weve seen of Whitney in like, two weeks. Some girl said hi to Shep and called him babe and I can see the smoke coming out of Landons ears. OMG JUST HIT ON HIM ALREADY, THIS IS SO PATHETIC TO WATCH.

Craig got Patricia this gaudy flamingo-decorated martini glass and Patricia just HAS to drop that she has 18th-century porcelain. Calm down, Patricia, nobody doubts that you have class. You don’t need to be so ostentatious.

Whitney: Trying to watch Thomas flirt with girls is like trying to watch your horny drunk uncle.

YES. SPOT ON. Somebody give Whitney more screen time!

Cameran shows up poss wasted and with a huge flamingo hat. Cameran is me in college, committing to the theme so hard she doesn’t care if she looks ridiculous.

Five seconds into the party, and Shep is already naked and in the pool. Don’t you know this is a classy affair??

Craig confronts Thomas about Kathryns hospital visit and asks if he saw her. Thomas is likeand Craig is like *sips wine*

Shit-starting Jen may or may not be lying about Thomas not going to visit Kathryn. It’s about to get real.

Craig: One of the reasons Thomas hates Jen so much is because she was supposed to be the fun mistress and wasnt supposed to stick around and meddle in his affairs.

THE PLOT THICKENS. Who can we trust? Nobody, really. Everybodys conniving af. Except Cameran. Im really liking her. Can you tell?

Some girl Bailey asked Landon if she and Shep have ever fucked, or even kissed.

Landon: I’m not gonna lie, theres sometimes I wonder if Shep and I could be in a relationship but I dont wanna risk getting hurt.

Landon. OMG. You are more transparent than every Kardashian PR stunt ever. You clearly wonder ALL THE TIME if you and Shep could be in a relationship, why youre not, when hes going to wake up and realize youre the one for him

Shep gets his fortune told and the fortune teller is like and Sheps like and everyones like Shep is just making a bunch of thats what she said jokes like the mature gentleman he is. Landon, you picked a real winner.

The gay dude who visited Kathryn earlier in the first episode (idk his name, go cross-reference my other recap if you really care that much) pulls Patricia aside to be like

Patricia: I think its very unattractive that hes friends with Kathryn Dennis. Its very low-rent to me. (Yes, she actually used the words “low-rent.”)

Dude whose name I 100% forgot: Its very clear what Patricia sees in Kathryn that she doesnt like: she sees herself.

Patricia calls this dude a knockoff Truman Capote. I gotta say, the South has got their shit-talking on point.

Jen shows up and we already know its going to be good. Thomas is not pleased and calls her a piece of trash. HERE WE GO.

Thomas: Tell this chick Im going to throw her in the pool. JD: You dont need another assault charge, homie.

One things for sure: some type of confrontation is about to go down.

JD is talking about doing another polo match. Jen is likeaka,

Thomas is watching Jen talk to Elizabeth and JD and hes just seething over there. FWIW, Elizabeth seems like a very nice woman. Jen does not, really. Thomas pulls Jen aside.

Thomas: Craig told me you told him I didn’t see Kathryn in the hospital Jen: I meant you didnt stay overnight

Cut to: Jen definitely in plain English saying that Thomas wasnt there at all.

Then Jen criticizes Thomas for only being there for two hours. Like, splitting hairs much? Youre just looking for a reason to shit on him.

Jen: If Thomas is criticizing me for putting Kathryns health at risk, he needs to take a long hard look in the mirror and then go play in traffic.

Thomas: A blind person could see through these lies.

They have a lie vs. misunderstanding argument for like 30 seconds before Thomas tells Jennifer to fuck off.

Jennifer: Im the only friend Kathryn trusts. It would be nice if the father of her kids was the other one.

Thomas thinks its Jens mission in life to wreck his life and make him out to be the enemy.

Jen: Im torn between completely cussing him out and telling him how I really feel, or just feeling sorry for him because hes truly delusional.

AKA how I feel watching this show.

Jens like, and Thomas is like And I’m like:

Patricia is not going to like this argument. Very not luxe.

Just when you think punches are about to fly, they both walk away from the argument. Phew, dodged a bullet. Or like, an assault charge.

JD: Thomas and Kathryn have enough problems, Jennifer doesnt need to add to them. This dams gonna break.

Exciting news tidbit: Thomas pronounces water like wooder.

Whats the first thing Jennifer does after being accused of starting drama? She fucking calls Kathryn from the porch of Patricias house! Whitney is like because his mom has to fight his battles. Everybodys gathered to watch while acting like theyre too classy to watch. Jennifer leaves on her own accord, fuck this show for being anticlimactic AF. I wanted an eviction!

Jennifer: I know what Kathryns going through because now I’m the one nobody likes.

Thomas: I can take a lot. Imprisonment, false political allegations, but do not mess with my family. It’s only okay when I treat Kathryn like shit.

Jennifer leaves yelling and once again this show is so fucking anticlimactic! You built up this party for three fucking episodes and what did we get? A heated argument from which both adults walk away on their own accord, and not even one person gets thrown out? Give me some damn drama, give me a fucking cliffhanger! Come on, Bravo! Do better.

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from All Of Beer http://allofbeer.com/2017/05/27/southern-charm-recap-flamingo-ing-crazy/ from All of Beer https://allofbeercom.tumblr.com/post/161120493767