#this is so stupid lmao i just wanted to make a shitpost for my own sanity | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

tteokdoroki · 1 year

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You said Victorian ladies making butter and all I can think about is Bakugou putting you into the butter churner sex position👀

smut mdni. gn!reader + butter churner position hehe.

- mentions of nipple tweaking, no pronouns or other anatomy described, and lord!bakugou and not historically accurate sorry !! <3 thank u miss jo for the shitpost turned thirst LMAO

ok so imagine bakugou but a lord from like the victorian era— destined to take over his parents estate and valuables as the eldest and singular son of the family but only on the condition that he marries of status. has children to keep the lineage going. bakugou cares for his family’s honour, but doesn’t for his suitor. she’s sweet, would make the perfect wife and child bearer— except she’s got no aspirations or wit or drive and the blonde isn’t in love with her. oh no.

he’s in love with you, the simple scullery staff who longs to the see the world by his side. so he really can’t help it, sneaking away from the small gathering his parents host for the new in-laws and for the bride to be— slipping away from the glitz and the glamour to fuck you stupid in the manor’s pantry.

“you really are just a spiteful little slut, aren’t ya?” the blonde snarls from above you, pushing your thighs further over your shoulders until your feet dangle either side of your head. katsuki sits on top of your folded body, thick cock plunging in and out of your soaked little hole as it creams and clenched around him. “just couldn’t help ya-self,” he slurs around the saliva on his tongue, gaze laser focused on the way you suck him in.

your body jolts with every thrust, chin tucked into your chest so that you can hardly breathe— your own saliva trailing down it as you take everything lord bakugou gives you. you are spiteful, you didn’t like the way his bride, katsuki’s future wife had been looking at him— touching what was rightfully yours despite the differences in status. all you’d done was spill her tiger’s milk cocktail on that stupid little rich girl dress of hers, retreating to the kitchens with a faux look of apology. desperate for your secret lover to follow.

and he did, happily wrecking your sloppy sex as punishment.

bakugou’s quite literally churning up your guts, directly on top of you— tip hitting all the right spots with every jut of bakugou’s hips downwards into yours. “ain’t you s’pposed answer when your master speaks t’you?” gone is his formal dialect as he ruins you through and through, your juices splashing up from your heat to paint his toned stomach— half heartedly exposed from how his attire is caught between his teeth.

blood rushes to your head, carrying waves of sex tinted ecstasy as bakugou’s balls slap hard against your ass— you have no idea how he expects you to form words between his swirling hips and calculated and forceful thrusts. “‘m-m sorry!” you cry out, mouth hanging open only to be gifted with a fat glob of spit from your lover. “p-please, my lord.” you pant and stick your tongue out to show him that you’ve swallowed.

“you’re not even fuckin’ sorry, y’just as selfish as this nasty hole of yers,” bakugou grunts at you, biting down on his own lip— seconds away from bursting and filling your tight sex up with all his seed. “a lowly fuckin’ servant who’d do anythin’ for their master’s cock, huh? to have me deep in their guts, creamin’ their insides,” he drawls hungrily, punctuating each of his words with curses and taps of his leaky tip against your pulsating hole before you’re cumming around him in a mix of twitches and muffled yelps— painting him with your release as a sinister smirk spreading across katsuki’s swollen lips.

“well lucky for you, you’re the only slut i want on my cock. you got that?”

#bakugou smut #bakugou x reader #bakugou thirst #bakugo smut #bakugo x reader #bakugou x you #bakugou drabbles #bakugo thirst #mha smut #bnha smut #bnha thirst #tteokdoroki #✧ ₊˚੭ — writing #✧ ₊˚✉️੭ — new notification #✧ ₊˚੭ — close friends story #♡︎₊˚jo.💥

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custer-mp3 · 3 years

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goths 🤝 trans ppl

having to convince civilians that all the changes to our physical form we've been thinking abt for weeks/months/ever are a) reversible b) whims

#WHY ARE PPL SO OBSESSED W YR ABILITY TO PUT IT BACK TO FACTORY DEFAULT BRO LMFAO #like no i MODDED that look how DOPE it is now. look at all my masterful work. you could NEVER #also lmao @ literally anything being excusable w 'lol idk just seemed like fun' cuz normies just mix shit up FOR NO REASON #but heaven forbid you think for longer than 2 seconds abt a change to yr appearance then it's all ~ARE YOU SURE. I DUNNO. MAYBE YOU SHOULD #AIT. THAT SEEMS AWFUL PERMANENT~#like no janet i assure u my stupid goth transgener haircut & yr stupid breakup haircut are the same amount of permanent LEAF ME BE #anyway this post brought to u by the realization that my mother has never seen my modified body & everything i've done to myself is longter #or truly permanent cuz i'm an adult & i can make that call & there's NOBODY to stop me or criticize me #like lmao i wanted to cut my hair shorter when i was 9 (after she'd lost custody) & she called it self-mutilation then spent the next seve #ral years BUTCHERING my fucking head against my will whenever she was allowed near me unsupervised as some sort of revenge for daring to #make a decision abt my own personal upkeep THAT SHE HAD NO HAND IN CUZ Y'KNOW. NONCUSTODIAL against her wishes #✨ child abuse ✨#anyway i'm an adult mallgoth now & it seems permanent how's that foot taste lmfao #OK TO RB BTW LMAO IT'S A SHITPOST

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cyncerity · 3 years

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Would noms become common in the shifter tommy au?? If so I’d love to see the first time bee n boo get nommed >:)

This is by far my most shitpost-y story ever because the bench trio are chaotic idiots

tw: vore and stupidity (I had a lot of fun with this one lmao)

“HOLY FUCK TOMMY YOU CAN EAT PEOPLE?!” Tubbo screeched as he slammed Tommy’s door open, causing the blonde to practically throw his phone against a wall in shock. Thankfully, he only dropped it onto the bed he was sitting on.

Tommy looked up to Tubbo and saw the shorter teen with his stupid mischievous grin on, and also saw Ranboo standing behind him in the doorway, looking confused as hell and really tired. Phil had invited the two over to hang out with Tommy while his family went to pick up things from the grocery store (which Tommy was banned at for being a dumbass).

“Tubbo what the fuck man why did you ask th-“ Tommy tried to finish as Ranboo interrupted with an explanation. “Phil told us that we were here so you wouldn’t be alone and Wilbur clarified that the last time they tried to leave you by yourself you swallowed them and had a panic attack and me and Tubbo are arguing over whether or not that was a joke.”

“Come one, Boo, if he can grow he can hypothetically swallow people, right?” “Stomach acid exists, Tubbo.” “Maybe he doesn’t have that?” “We’ve both seen him eat before.” “Phil wouldn’t have looked as pissed at Wil if it was a joke…”

Tommy sighed as the two argued. Well, no use in hiding now. “Yeah, I can eat people.” Tommy shrugged, effectively shutting both of his friends up. After they didn’t believe Tommy about his powers the first time and were proven very wrong, Tommy’s friends had taken to believing every word Tommy said about his abilities. Ranboo just stared at a complete loss for words as Tubbo jumped onto Tommy’s bed. “That’s so fucking cool! Can you eat me?”

“Uh, thanks? That’s honestly not the reaction I was expecting. But sure, if you want.” Tommy said, trying to act nonchalant when in reality he was losing his shit over the fact that Tubbo had just asked to be eaten. Tommy secretly loved the feeling of having people in his stomach (even if it had only happened once and even thinking about it made his stomach feel sore), but he would rather die then ask someone if he could eat them. Even if he had technically eaten everyone he lived with, but that was an accident. Technically.

“Hold on a minute,” Ranboo finally said. “You’re telling me that you can just…swallow people? And they’ll be fine?? How do you… what does… I… How??”

Tommy laughed at Ranboo’s attempt at a question. “I don’t know, man, it’s just something I can do. I guess my body can just tell when something alive is…in me, for lack of a better term, and keep them alive.” “What if it backfires?”Ranboo asked. “Are you alive?” “Wh-yes??” “Then it won’t.”

The taller teen sighed and looked at Tubbo, who was practically vibrating with excitement. “Well then, I’m not letting Tubbo go in alone.”

Tommy didn’t even have time to process the response before Tubbo was dragging him into the living room by his wrist. “Come on, there’s a higher ceiling in here, do your thing, big man.” He said, finally letting go of Tommy’s wrist.

Tommy took that as his cue. He focused his energy on making himself big enough to swallow two people before having to readjust himself after remembering how tall Ranboo was. When he was ready, he picked up both of his friends and held them to his face.

“And you’re both ok with this? Ranboo, there’s no fault in chickening out.” Tommy smirked. “Actually there is, since I know neither of you would ever let me hear the end of it.” Ranboo jokingly replied before forcefully opening Tommy’s upper lip. Tommy took this as an incentive to just shove Ranboo and Tubbo in his mouth, causing Ranboo to yelp and Tubbo to start giggling wildly as Tommy coated them in saliva.

The flavor of his friends made Tommy practically melt, and he had to keep himself from purring at the taste. Not because he thought it would scare them, but because the thought of them learning he could purr was somehow more embarrassing than having to explain that he could eat people.

Tubbo tasted like citrus honey and Ranboo had a vanilla caramel taste to him that made his mouth water. Tommy wasn’t sure how long he kept them in his mouth but eventually someone (probably Tubbo) kicked his tongue, reminding him that he couldn’t keep his friends in his mouth all day no matter how much he wanted to. He squished the two against his cheek with his tongue just to be an asshole for a second before swallowing them down. He felt the weight slip down his collarbone and took a moment to marvel at how much better swallowing felt when no one thought they were going to die.

He felt the two drop into his stomach and his hands instinctively went to his middle. He felt the slightly heavier weight, almost certainly Ranboo, try and stand up before falling back down immediately. He heard and felt Tubbo laugh at him before Tubbo started trying to stand and explore his surroundings himself, getting the bright idea of leaning on the walls around his as he walked around the small space. As soon as Tommy felt Tubbo near the front of his stomach, he made it a point to push his stomach in just enough to knock Tubbo over, causing Ranboo to laugh this time.

“Pfft karma bitch.” Tommy laughed. “No fair, Ranboo fell on his own, you pushed me.” “All’s fair in love and war.”

Tubbo responded to this by playfully shoving at the front of the stomach, causing Tommy to pause. Last time he did this, his stomach throbbed with pain because of the abuse his family had put it through. But now he couldn’t deny how nice it felt when Tubbo did that. It felt like an internal massage, and Tommy had to resist purring again. He did, however, start rubbing circles at where he felt his friends in what he hoped portrayed an appreciative gesture, happy that time found friends to share his weird abilities with. He loved them, and he knew they knew that without him even having to say it.

“So…what do you guys wanna do now?” Tommy asked, drumming his fingers on his middle.

Ranboo tried to reply before Tubbo cut him off. “Well, we could just sleep like normal people but I’m sure Tubbo has a worse sugges-“ “You should jump of the roof, I wanna know what that wound feel like from in here!!”

“I like that idea better!”

“Oh my god, seriously-“

#cyncerity #cynwrites #g/t #mcyt g/t #mcyt gt #mcytg/t #mcytgt #sizeshifter!tommy au #sizeshifter!tommy #giant!tommy #tiny!tubbo #tiny!ranboo

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dirtygfconfessions · 2 years

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do you see why people wanted the blog to be left alone now? the entire concept of “dirty gravity falls confessions” was literally the humor of 15 year olds in 2015, it doesn’t hold up 6+ years later. it hasn’t aged well. this blog was always getting weird horny asks, and by keeping this thing running for a crowd that didn’t mature, youre kinda just encouraging it. youd have a lot better time just making your own fandom blog and leaving this dead horse in its grave.

lmao im not "encouraging" that shit i literally left this blog alone for YEARS until some asshole mod deleted every single post on here. i literally only "revived" the blog to reupload some lost history since it meant a lot to people. now that most things were found and archived once again the blog is just for the occasional shitpost now. like yea i agree this entire concept of a blog is stupid and the humor isnt great but i kept it around for a reason. i made this blog when i was 14 and i was devastated when everything got deleted even if it was long after the fact i abandoned it. because it was a huge part of my online experience as a teenager and i met so many of my friends through it. if you really dont want to see me try and reserve some fond memories for myself and others then why are u still following this blog at all? dont be such a dick lmao

#mod bip #not a confession

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jean-kayak · 3 years

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Chapter 1

Summary: A relaxing summer at home after your second year of college sounds nice, until someone comes back and makes it anything but

Pairing: Eren Jaeger x black!fem!reader

Chapter Warnings: cursing, a lot of sexual tension lmao

Word Count: 2139

A/N: Alright, here it is! I’ve been working on this for a while now, if you’ve been following my shitposts, and I’ve been really nervous to post it, so I would like to thank @styxtm for reading this chapter and giving me the confidence to post it! Hope you guys like it!

Tags: @her-majesty-kiara, @germfart3, @styxtm, @iwascrybaby

Chapter summary: Someone you’d never thought you’d see again literally walks back into your life

"When are you gonna be done? It's hot as fuck out here," you complain, waving a hand in front of your face, but it doesn't anything to cool you down, instead spreading the humid, sticky air across your face.

You hear Jean groan as you set down the tray of nails you have in your hands on the ground, throwing your hair up in a bun, getting the curls off of your neck. "Stop complaining. It's not even that bad."

"You chose to build a storage unit during one of the hottest days so far in the summer," you respond, and he just chuckles as he blindly holds his hand out. You pick through the different pieces, finding the one he needs before dropping it into his hand.

"My mom wanted it built, and my stepdad's been too busy, so I offered to do it."

"You offered to do it. I just came over here to hang out," you say, sighing heavily as you rest a hand on your hip.

You've been best friends with Jean since you were kids, growing up in the same neighborhood, literally living right next to each other, and when you graduated high school, you both ended up going to different colleges.

You had decided to stay on your college campus for the summer after your freshman, not ready to go back home yet. Now your sophomore year of college is over, and both you and Jean ended up coming back home to do who knows what, but ever since you both have come back, you've either been over his house or vice versa.

Both of your parents always joked about how it seemed like you two were separated at birth, constantly attached at the hip, and sometimes it really does feel like he's a brother to you. He was always there for you when your other friends weren't, and since you were an only child, he saved you multiples from boredom due to not having anyone to spend time with.

"I'm almost done, I just need you to help me hold this last wall." You walk over to where he's standing, resting your back against the wall as he screws in the last few nails. "Okay, I think that's it," he says, and you both walk back as you take in the new building.

You both tilt your head, the building finally seeming to stand upright. "How'd you manage to make it slanted?" you ask, and Jean sighs as he lets his head fall back in annoyance.

"I don't know," he says, looking through the instructions, and you look to your left as you scoff lightly.

"Well, those look like the foundation pieces," you comment, pointing to the plates that the building is supposed to be on top of. "You did good though, I just don't know how long the building will last."

"Whatever, I'm done. It's hot," he sighs and you bristle as you both start walking towards his house.

"Says the one who said it wasn't even that bad," you argue, and he waves you off.

"That's because the clouds were providing shade." You huff lightly at his weak counter.

"Yeah, okay." Your body nearly goes limp as you feel the cool air wrap around your body when you step into the house, Jean sliding the patio door closed, cutting off the stifling heat. You plop down on the loveseat, sinking down into the plush leather as it cools your heated skin.

"Heads up." You open your eyes in time to see Jean throwing you a bottle of water, and you catch it easily, opening it as he sits down on the couch. "What else are you planning on doing this summer?"

You shrug lazily. "I don't know. Party?" you try, and he raises an eyebrow at you.

"You want to spend the whole summer partying?"

"There's nothing else to do, and Ymir always finds the best parties." You had been friends with her since high school and by your senior year, you were joining her at a different party almost every other weekend. You wouldn't really say it was the best time of your life, but it definitely gave you a distraction from the current dilemma you were having at the time. "Pretty sure there'll be one soon since everyone's coming back. Unless you have any better ideas."

"I guess I'll go to a few, but I don't--"

The sound of the front door opening and an awfully familiar voice cuts Jean off. "Damn, it feels good in here." The dilemma walks into the living room, stopping when he sees you and Jean. "Oh, shit, what're you doing here?"

"At my house? I could ask you the same thing," Jean shoots back at his brother, and you feel a strong urge to leave, running back to your own house. "I thought you were staying in that city, why are you here, Eren?"

Eren fucking Jaeger. The stubborn dilemma you had to deal with all of your life, but it especially got worse to deal with once you got to high school. Probably the textbook definition of a bad boy, the sleeves of tattoos you can see on his arms and the piercings solidify it.

Oh, and he's also your best friend's older step-brother.

He shrugs. "Dunno. Guess I just wanted to come back, glad I did though." You look away when you see him smirk, knowing that last bit was geared towards you.

You stand up quickly, drinking some water in hopes that it hides your nerves well. "I'm starving. You got any food?" you ask Jean as you walk towards the kitchen, purposefully walking the long way so that you don't have to go anywhere near him.

"I don't know, you can look," he calls after you, and you can feel Eren's eyes on you as you walk, suddenly feeling very naked in your shorts and cropped tank top.

When you're in the safety of the kitchen and you hear the conversation between the siblings start, you sigh heavily as you rest your head against the counter. Of course, it would be just your fucking luck that he would come back.

You groan softly in frustration as you lift your head up and grab an orange, peeling it a little more aggressively than you should as you hop onto the counter. You huff slightly as you put a slice into your mouth. This is a total wreck in your plans.

To anyone else, it wouldn't seem like a big deal, but your history with Eren isn't the greatest. Maybe starting with the fact that you started to have a crush on him which ended up only blossoming once you got to high school. And the worst part was that everyone knew it. You know they did, but it's not like you were discreet about it.

You were just a naive teenager that was stupid enough to fall? Maybe not fall for him, but you definitely were stupid enough to think that he could possibly be into you.

Your inner turmoil is only fueled when he walks into the kitchen, you failing to notice that the conversation had stopped. You look down at your legs, swinging them as you continue to eat the orange, trying to focus on anything but the suffocating awkward tension in the room.

You can see him lean against the counter across from the one your sitting on, crossing his foot over his ankle. When you find yourself staring at his thighs and how tight his shorts are, you quickly look away. "So, how ya been?" he asks, and you find yourself rolling your eyes at his poor attempt to make small talk.

"Good," you answer, not even looking up, patting a simple rhythm on your thigh, his strong gaze on you making you feel some type of way. "College was fun," you add.

You hear him chuckle softly. "Yeah? Looks like it treated you really good."

You feel your face flush warm as you look up, and you hate your body still reacts the same way it did years back. It's your turn to take him in, and you bite your lip hesitantly, noticing that college treated him very well.

He does more than fill out his clothes, they're practically like a second skin the way they stretch out over his body. Your eyes trail over his inked arms, trying to make out everything that you can see. He's grown his hair out, it's longer now, opting for putting his hair up in a high bun, the silver piercings shining in the light when he turns his head slightly. Your eyes catch the simple gold chain around his neck, and you realize that you've been staring for too long.

"So, what are you doing here?" you ask, and you're genuinely asking because according to Jean, he wasn't supposed to be here, and you thought this summer was going to be smooth sailing.

"A little birdie told me that you were here, so..." he trails off with a shrug, and you squint your eyes at him.

"So, you came back just for me?"

"What if I told you I did?" You scoff as you toss the orange peel in the trashcan, putting the last two slices in your mouth.

"I would tell you," you start, finishing the slices. "That you're ridiculous." He hums as he smiles at you, moving away from the counter, standing in front of you.

"So, what's the deal with you and my brother anyway?" he questions suddenly, and you shake your head slowly.

"You mean like if I like him or something?" You scoff. "He's my best friend, and he's into someone else anyway."

He nods, his eyebrows creasing as he thinks. "Oh, yeah. That Mikasa chick, right? She's kinda hot."

"What do you want, Eren?" Now you're getting annoyed, and you hate how you feel that tiny fire of jealousy burning in your chest at his comment. He moves closer to you, and you don't even realize that your legs spread to fit his frame.

"There's a lot of things I want," he answers, resting his hands dangerously close to your thighs on the counter.

"Is one of those things to annoy the hell out of me?" you joke, and he chuckles as he nods his head.

"Maybe. That's one."

"A lot of people don't get what they want."

You feel your breathing hitch when he leans in closer to you, close enough that you can feel his breath fanning over your face. "I got all summer to get what I want."

You gulp harshly as you find it difficult to tear your eyes away from his. "What is it?" you ask, your voice a lot more airy than you want it to be.

He tilts his head to the side like he's thinking as you try to find a way out of this situation. "It's more of a who than an it," he tells you, and try to slow your breathing which you didn't even realize had picked up. That's how much of an effect he has on you, and you hate it.

"Well, I hope you get who you're looking for," you respond, but he doesn't move when you shift.

"Eren, leave her alone, she doesn't want anything to do with you," Jean yells from the living room, but Eren's eyes never leave yours as he grins.

"I think you beg to differ," he whispers, and you scoff.

"You would be terribly wrong." And it really is hard to lie when your body is screaming the truth.

"I would?" he questions, keeping his voice low, and you glance to your right, seeing that Jean can't see into the kitchen, and you jump when he pulls you into him by your thighs. Your lower half is touching him, and if you move your legs, they'll tighten around his waist, so you don't move. "You're not a very good liar," he says, his lips just in front of yours, so close that if you even lean in a smidge, you'd be kissing him.

"And that means?"

"Getting you right where I want you won't take all summer." Your mouth falls open slightly as your body goes warm all over. You need to get out of here before you do something you shouldn't.

"Eren, what the hell are you doing?" Eren gives you a wink before he moves away from you.

"Nothing, man. Just making small talk." He crosses his arms as he leans back against the counter, and you find yourself glued to your spot before your brain tells you to move, hopping off the counter, not giving him another look as you walk out of the kitchen, feeling his gaze burning into you.

So much for a relaxing summer.

|Masterlist|Chapter 2|

Taglist: CLOSED

#nothing changed #eren jaeger #eren yaeger #eren jaeger x reader #eren yaeger x reader #eren jaeger x you #eren yaeger x you #aot fanfiction #snk fanfiction

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fricklefracklefloof · 2 years

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tag game!! ty @pocketsizedquasar for tagging me :))

1- Why did you choose your url

my url is just the same un i use for other sites that i post art on (instagram, deviantart, etc) BUT the original idea came from when i was in... shudders... middle school... there was a short period of time where i kept saying "FRICKLE FRACKLE" as a substitute for fuck or something and then i just tacked on floof because i'm a furry

i've been wanting to change my url for like a month now i'm just too scared of change lol </3

2- Any side blogs?

not... really? except for @jesperofficial but that's a joke soc roleplay blog i don't use anymore

3- How long have you been on tumblr?

since 2019 i think? it's been over a year

4- Do you have a queue tag?

no because i rarely queue you get my posts when you get them

5- Why did you start your blog in the first place?

i started this blog as a throwaway account because i wanted to join the grishaverse big bang. i didn't even want to join tumblr at the time but i wanted to be a part of the event more so i made it just so they'd have something to link back to LMAO. but then i started like... yknow talking to people who only used this site... and then i started lurking when i was really really bored... and then my friends convinced me to check the site like every day... and then i started posting only my fanart and then i downloaded the app on my phone and it was just downhill from there. sigh.

6- Why did you choose your icon/pfp?

i just like guillermo i just really like how his face came out in that drawing he looks cute <3

7- Why did you choose your header?

umm i like using my own art for stuff like this bc it makes me feel better about using images that i've created myself instead of possibly stealing from someone else and i think that drawing was cute it makes me happy :) it's kinda old though i might change it plus the fact that i added like 2394587394587 filters to it to make it fit the pink aesthetic is showing painfully

8-What’s your post with the most notes?

this jon + the admiral comic i made a while ago :) it's cute i think it's a bit cheesy and also kinda old but i'm very very proud of how i drew the admiral in that one so i'm happy that this one ended up being my top post lmao

9- How many mutuals do you have?

shit idk i don't really like the whole "mutual" thing i think we should just be friends instead of pretending that we are

10- How many followers do you have?

405 :o i didn't know that

11- How many people do you follow?

368! i don't even remember who i follow sometimes lmao

12- Have you ever made a shitpost?

probably

13- How often do you use Tumblr each day?

at least once a day </3 used to hate myself for it but now i just embrace it

14- Did you have a fight/argument with another blog once?

ummm i mean i GUESS you could call them fights i've gotten anon hate for stupid shit and have had um. Discussions with people about racism in the grishaverse but most of them were pretty one-sided i've never had full on reblog chains or Tumblr User Fricklefracklefloof Vs Other Tumblr User fights it's just. someone saying something and then me replying. i try to be civil.

although i did have a friend once (or ig we were just "mutuals") who flat out blocked me with no response after i said something mildly accusatory and i still haven't recovered from that </3 just communicate with me please goddamn

15- How do you feel about “you need to reblog this” posts?

i get the point they're trying to make but they're guilt trippy and ultimately don't end up solving the issue they think they're solving. (i'm assuming we're talking about the human rights posts that are all like "if you don't reblog this you're a monster!!" etc etc.) yes it's important to speak up about issues but by telling people they Have To Reblog This Or Else it just... scares people into supporting something without going through the critical thinking about it. at least that's how i see it. you can't truly support something if you don't understand wtf you're talking about. reblogging something like that for the sake of reblogging it is just... well it's performative.

16- Do you like tag games?

yes :)

17- Do you like ask games?

YEA THEY SEEM FUN i've never done one before bc idk i'm scared no one's gonna wanna do it with me but yes i think i would enjoy them

18-Which of your mutuals do you think is Tumblr famous?

oh i know who is tumblr famous but i don't wanna out them like that

19- Do you have a crush on a mutual?

ahaha! ahahahaha! that's funny i'm not sharing that

tagging @souleatering (or whatever blog you wanna use wybie idk) @jawbonemage and whoever else wants to :)

#tag game

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ii-kanjiiiii · 3 years

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A Crazy Day at Miku Expo

A Vocaloid shitpost story

Warnings: swearing, contains Kaito x Meiko

Chapter 1

It was a normal day in the Cryptonloid household, like always. It was 12pm and Meiko was already up because she’s a normal person.

“GET UP YOU IDIOTS WE HAVE TO LEAVE FOR MIKU EXPOOO!!!!” she woke the rest of the Cryptonloids up as she was a thoughtful person.

“OH SHIT I FORGOT!!” Miku screamed. Her hair looked like Chuckie Finster from Rugrats but had a much larger mass.

“WAIT WHAT THE FUCK WE’RE PERFORMING TONIGHT?!!? PLS NOOOOO I HAVE A PIMPLE!!!” Len cried.

Miraculously, all of them had somehow forgotten that they had a Miku Expo concert in the mystical country of Hajarputa that night. Except for Meiko, because she was a responsible person.

Once they were done packing and getting ready, they went into their private Miku jet which was covered with Miku faces and had big words that said “HATSUNE MIKU” because Miku is the best and owns the world.

Inside, ‘World is Mine’ was playing on loop and the wall was covered in Miku wallpaper and posters. Meiko sat on a Miku couch at the front, because Meiko is queen and is obviously the sexiest one. Kaito, being the simp that he is, sat next to her.

Luka went all the way to the back of the Miku jet and sat in a Miku chair in the corner, away from everyone else as she was tired of everyone’s bullshit.

Miku and the demonic twins were in the middle, just jumping around and throwing shit everywhere as they were still high as fUCK from the FRUIT loops they ate for breakfast.

Suddenly, ‘World is Mine’ stopped playing, and the pilot made an announcement through the plane intercom. Or whatever it’s called lmao I don’t know.

“Good afternoon, ladies and gentlemen. Welcome onboard Flight Miku. We will be taking off from Sapporo to Hajarputa. I am Sonic the Hedgehog and I am your pilot for today. Just kidding bitch, my name is actually うんち(‘Jonathan Harris’ in Japanese). We are expected to reach Hajarputa in about 22 hours. I swear to God, PLEASE put on your seatbelts or you’re gonna fucking die. We also ask that you ensure your seats are in the upright position for take-off, if not you’ll fucking die. Please turn off all personal electronic devices, if not you’ll fucking die as well. Don’t smoke too, cause you’ll get lung cancer and fucking die. Thank you for choosing Miku Airlines. Enjoy your flight. I definitely will not crash this plane. I swear.”

'World is Mine’ was back playing on loop again.

“Well that was comforting,” Meiko said, being a sarcastic piece of shit.

“Lol what? I don’t remember hiring this man,” Miku said. “Lol, whatever,” she shrugged.

Some time after the Miku Jet took off, Kaito and Meiko started fighting over what they would name their non-existent kid that they would never have.

“If she’s a girl, Sakura is the best name!! It represents beauty and optimism,” Kaito said.

“It also represents death,” Meiko argued. “And who the fuck names their kid after a plant? Enaado is the best name!!”

“The fuck kinda name is Enaado?” Len, who was seated far away from them, muttered to himself. Meiko, who was somehow able to hear him, pulled a super soaker gun out of nowhere and squirted him all the way from the other end of the plane.

Some hours later, the vocaloids were bored as heck and ‘World is Mine’ playing on loop was driving them to insanity(except for Miku of course).

“Can you turn that shit off, Miku? I swear to God, if I hear “sekai de ichiban ohime-sama” one more damn time, my internal organs are going to explode,” Luka said, smashing her head against the wall.

“Geez, fine, Luka! You don’t have to be so mean about it, it’s not my fault you don’t know how to appreciate good art,” Miku rolled her eyes, then she changed the song to ‘Popipo’ on loop, which was probably 100x worse.

“YOU’RE my sekai de ichiban ohime-sama, Me-chan~<3” Kaito UwU-ed. She smacked him with a magazine.

Another time skip, Miku wanted to play truth or dare lmao. Luka, Miku and the twins sat in a circle and started playing.

“Oh yeah, by the way, Mei-nee and Kai-nii are in the game too,” Miku said.

“Wtf no thanks,” Meiko immediately said, not looking up from her magazine about self control & anger management.

“No, you can’t escape, Mei-nee,” Miku replied, staring intensely into her soul. She then got a piece of rope out of nowhere and tied Meiko and Kaito to their chairs.

“TRUTH OR DARE, MEI-NEE?” Miku asked, her eye twitching.

“Ugh, fine. Truth,” Meiko replied, as she had no other choice.

Meanwhile, Kaito was having Vietnam war flashbacks as Miku tying him to the chair reminded him of that one time he got kidnapped by Sonic the Hedgehog. (An event that happened in my other fanfic that I’m not going to post.)

“Do you want to make out with Kai-nii?” Miku asked with a stupid shitty grin on her face.

“What the fuck? Oh, HELL NO. I think I already know how this is gonna go,” Meiko muttered.

“AnSwEr tHe qUeStiOn!!!” Miku yelled impatiently, flipping the fucking table.

“Dare!” Meiko quickly said, sweating.

“I dare you to make out with Kai-nii,” Miku said, raising her eyebrows up and down like fucking Mr. Bean.

Upon hearing this, Kaito’s attention was caught and he snapped out of his Vietnam war flashbacks.

“GODDAMN IT!!” Meiko cursed.

“Oh my GOD, Kaito. Don’t give me THAT look,” Meiko said, terrified for her life as she noticed Kaito looking at her with considerable interest.

“Why the hell did you give that dare, Miku? Literally NO ONE wants to see that shit,” Len said, staring judgingly at Miku. He definitely did not have to see his parents smashing their faces together.

“Yeah, Len’s right,” Luka said. “Aight, Imma head out. Bye bitches,” she flipped her fabulous long hair and strolled out elegantly. Once she reached her seat at the far corner of the plane, she opened her laptop and looked at images of the Gingerbread Man from Shrek.

“Shut up Len and just watch the show!” Rin, who was just as delusional as Miku, scolded.

“MEIKOUT MEIKOUT MEIKOUT MEIKOUT MEIKOUT” the crazy girls started chanting.

I’m so sorry

I really have no idea where this shitty fanfic is going

TIME SKIP LOL

It was nighttime and the Cryptonloids were sleeping in their beds with Miku blankets and ‘Popipo’ was still playing on loop. Suddenly, the Miku Jet started shaking really hard, then everyone flew out of their beds and hit their heads on the ceiling. After a few seconds, the Miku Jet stopped shaking and everyone fell back to the ground.

“Heh heh, sorry folks. Just a little air turbulence is all,” Pilot うんち announced.

“What the actual FUCK?? “A ‘liTtLE’ aIR tUrBuLeNcE” he said!! I don’t think we should be entrusting that guy with our LIVES!!” Meiko seethed. “I’m going to have a word with him.” she stormed off to the Pilot’s cabin.

“Wait Me-chan, I’ll come too,” Kaito said, and tagged along with her for extra support because he was a good boyfriend.

Once they reached the Pilot’s cabin, she slid open the door and shouted “LISTEN UP, MISTER, DO YOUR DAMN JOB PROPERLY!!”

“Oh, Meiko-san, hello!” the pilot spun his chair around and smiled. “Oh, Kaito, you’re here too! How’s it going, buddy? Has Sonic been bothering you any more?”

Meiko and Kaito’s eyes widened as they realised who the pilot was.

“FUKASE??!!!!” they screamed in shock. His Ronald Mcdonald hair was unmistakable.

“No, I’m うんち. Who the hell is Fukase?” うんち/Fukase said.

“WHY ARE YOU FLYING A PLANE, FUKASE??!! AREN’T YOU LIKE, FOURTEEN?!??!!!” Meiko screamed.

“Uh, no, I’m fifteen. Also, the age of consent in Japan is thirteen, sooo I don’t see any problem with it,” he replied.

“WHAT THE HELL DOES AGE OF CONSENT HAVE TO DO WITH FLYING A PLANE???!!” Meiko screamed, ripping her hair out. I really need to stop using scream.

"Umm… with all due respect, Fukase, are you even qualified for this?” Kaito spoke up.

“Yeah, DUH. I’ve had years worth of flight experience from Microsoft Flight Simulator on the Xbox!” he replied. “What kinda dumb shit would hire someone who ISN’T qualified??”

“oH mAN OH GOD OUR LIVES ARE IN THE HANDS OF THAT DUMB KID OH MAN OH GOD OH MAN OH GOD OH MAN OH GOD-“ Meiko was hyperventilating in the corner and hugging her legs, sweat pouring down her face. It was unlike her to freak out like this, she was usually calm and kept her cool. However, this is Fukase we’re talking about, and any rational person would be freaking out and fearing for their lives.

“Breathe, Me-chan, breathe,” Kaito attempted to calm her down. “Don’t worry, okay? Everything’s gonna be just fine. Nothing bad will happen. Everything is okay,” he assured her, hugging her tightly.

“How would YOU know that???” she asked.

“I don’t,” he replied. “When things get rough, denial is all we have,” he said, giving his Stupid Bakaito Grin™.

TO BE CONTINUED MAYBE???1??1

#im so sorry #vocaloid #fanfic #vocaloid fanfic #hatsune miku #meiko #kaito #kagamine len #kagamine rin #megurine luka #trash

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literaphobe · 4 years

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What's your most chaotic interaction from tumblr? Like rate dumb things that has happened or something jkshceks

oh my god get ready because this took me looking through my asks back until early 2017. i got whiplash reliving some of these. narrowed many moments down to the best ones. behold some of my most chaotic/dumb interactions on tumblr, from most recent to least:

‘not to be an asshole but could you stop making content’ incredible. came for my entire life. for $8,000 i will stop. 8/10

‘why can’t adora be white? :( don’t us white lesbians deserve representation too? :(’ i wanted to die when i got this ask. i still am in disbelief over the fact that this happened. 9/10

‘read your fic - you’re gay’ yeah i got clocked for being gay. what the fuck :( exposed :( 7/10

‘can you flirt in the dms i’m too single for this shit’ getting scolded by anons for allegedly flirting.... yeah call me out! 7/10

‘i have reported you to the secret service for talking about assassinating trump btw’ was anon messing w me? did they want me to be scared? who knows. im not even american. 6.5/10

‘fyi i took a screenshot of one of your posts. ten minutes later my house burnt down so now a screenshot of your post is next to pictures of my house in flames’ 9.5/10. it was definitely my fault. im so sorry i caused your house to burn anon i take full responsibility. u didn’t even blame me for the fire but u should have

‘how dare u say straights aren’t allowed in the b99 fandom. its 2019 fandoms should be inclusive and welcoming of people regardless of their sexuality????’ 9/10. still cannot believe till this day that i was accused of oppressing the straights

‘jake is straight you can die mad about it 😘‘ 9/10. amazing. love it when straight people send me death threats for headcanoning characters as bi

‘how do you pronounce your name i’ve been saying it as mice hell’ 9.5/10. absolutely incredible that anon thought my incredibly common name michelle was pronounced like this

‘An hour or two? LOL NO. I browse tumblr barely for 15-20 minutes. Of which I have exactly 90 seconds to go through your blog and read dcau chapter if there are responses of new one. Which I do in hardly 45 seconds. So, I actually just skim through the chapter and absorb more than others who read it like twice/thrice. Also, I am writing this long ass ask because my girlfriend is making me wait in my car and wasting our precious time we'd be spending on our date instead. YIKES.’ 9.5/10. ok for context. i uploaded a 15k chapter for a fic and in the tags i told people to be prepared because the chapter might take them like an hour or two to read. and this anon was pissed off that i would dare assume they would take such a long time to read my fic. also they had to tell me why they took the time to send me that ask in the first place. it is so fucking funny

‘Fuck can't wait. You told Monday, now you're telling Tuesday tommorow you'll say Wednesday? Bitch.😠‘ 7/10 i told people i would post my fic on monday but then i delayed it and this anon called me a bitch. this ask is hilarious

‘Not just to Andy but also every other stranger. Nobody should let you near them if they are uncomfortable. You are bisexual that means everyone should know that you are an equal Potential Threat to all females with all the harassing going on. Being bisexual has its own advantages and disadvantages. You too fall into the category of creepy males creeppin out other females.‘ 8.5/10. i said ‘i want to hug andy samberg’ once and anon decided i was a predator. like yes this is so biphobic but also the way they treated me like a dangerous threat for wanting to hug a celebrity is so funny

‘i just got home from getting kidnapped for 5 days (lol long story) but seeing that you updated your fic definitely helped!’ 10/10. probably the most iconic ask i have ever gotten. also anon was serious and came back in a second ask to explain a little bit more about what happened. i hope they are living a safe happy life now

‘not to burst your fandom bubble but my child’s middle name was in honor of my father not b99′ remember when chelsea peretti roasted me for making an inaccurate joke about how the middle name of hers and jordan peele’s child was ‘gino’ because it was like the boy version of gina? remember how she slapped me in the face and i completely deserved it for making a stupid joke? my shitposts have definitely been the death of me. will i stop? no. 10/10

‘cocaine girl do not die in that earthquake’ okay so. cocaine girl was one of the funniest commenters i have ever had the pleasure of knowing on my most popular fic. one day in her comment she said ‘there’s an earthquake happening rn hope i don’t die sskksksks’ and then she vanished. she didn’t comment for several chapters. i was super fucking worried you guys i thought she died or didn’t like my fic anymore. according to my memory she came back like weeks later in my comment section like ‘lmao yeah something hit my head during the earthquake and i was in the hospital for five days im ok now tho’ 10/10

#ask #me: michelle u do not need to put in that much effort into answering asks #also me: yes i do fuck u #send me asks asking me to rate things out of 10!#yes here is some of the history of this blog #there is a lot more history i am hiding #but yeah the last couple are some of the greatest hits #incredible #this post def goes from 1 to 100000 #dhfsjjfdhsjd #Anonymous

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smallcrystals · 3 years

Note

How and why did you start liking Flash Sentry so much?

this is probably gonna be long

i got into eqg pretty young tbh, like i loved the first movie when it came out, but i didn't get into the fandom until around late 2016? which i consider a good thing bc i definitely wouldn't have been able to deal with the amount of hate flash got eariler (but even then i still saw some crazy shit)

it took a few months or so to end up super attached to him but after those months i was like . this is my baby. he is mine. he just grew on me, made me giggle and smile in every scene he was in (excluding the part where he yells at twi in rainbow rocks, we don't speak of that). not to mention i cried during cheer you on, jesus christ

i think with all the hate i saw of him at such a young age (like . early teens) it definitely left me super sensitive to how people jokingly treat him now. i know mostly everyone is joking when they make fun of him but it just reminds me of those days where he got non-stop hate for just existing.

im not against the valid reasons for disliking him, such as poor writing, forced heterormativity at all because i can definitely see why!! it makes sense. but the other reasons ,, did not make sense to me and still don't

mainly bc these reasons were spewed up by stupid bronies. like . "waifu stealer"???? really????

however, hate aside, i just got super attached to this dorky, super sweet guy. i see a lot of myself in him. maybe it's the way that i've basically grown up with him that i might have just subconsciously kinned him before knowing what that meant.

i'm really shy, socially awkward, a stupid dork, clumsy and i often get brushed aside. i'm sort of in my own corner a lot of the time and i kinda see that in flash, despite him being literally one of the most popular students at chs lmao

my friends say im most likely to fall in love easily and maybe that's true, i can see that (i have this really bad crush on a girl rn so hahahaha) but yeah.

since then ive kind of . projected onto flash sentry. i just love him so much, it's so stupid lol

there's so much i want to discover abt him that the writers failed to do, like what was his relationship with sunset like, what's his family like, does him being popular actually affect him and has it affected him in the past, what does he wanna become in the future? that ended up spiralling me down the path of fanfiction and here i am :')

but yeah that's !! how i ended up being basically a shitpost headcanon blog for this blue haired dork boy !! thanks for coming to my tedtalk !!! :D

#i love him so so SO much #*fist clench*#flash sentry #rasa speaks #ask tag

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maddiefriendlovesbilly · 4 years

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Spencer x Ghost?

Spencer x Ghost

(AAAAA- it has been months since you sent this to me, and all i can say is im so sorry) Side note I have my friend @lethalbreadkills helping me with this one!

For reference: Maddie (maddiefriendlovesbilly) is green, Jimmy (lethalbreadkills) is red (((its 4:30 at the time i have joined this so im dead braincell wise sorry yall))) and Orange is stuff we decided together :3

Also this is so very chaotic im so sorry for this anon but this has been in my fuckin drafts for SO LONG and this is the only way its getting finished (its now 5 am uwu) im so sorry for all the shitposting i do its a mess. I shouldnt have been allowed here. (we finished at about 5:30 am its hell <3)

Sphost? Ghencer?? Sphoster??? I adore and despise them all equally.

We have decided that it should be BeanieGhost

Anyway I think this ship is really cute

They’re both so neurotic I can only imagine the chaos that would ensue

One of them starts a rant on some topic and the other joins the hell in

I’m an advocate of LETTING SPENCER INFO DUMP BECAUSE HE DESERVES IT OKAY

And Ghost would let this dream come true???

I would die for both of them and if Spencer told me I had to die I wouldn’t even complain, no questions I’d just be like “Aight.” I trust him that much.

(Not sure I trust Ghost’s judgment enough to do that unquestioningly; sorry Ghost)

Back on topic

I can’t imagine these guys on anything that comes close to society’s definition of a date

It’d be more like “hey you wanna come on this hunt with us?” “maybe, depends if there’ll be snacks” or like chilling in Spence’s room binging the entire star trek: original series in one sitting or “oops sorry about that level 11 entity that attached to my soul and is now wreaking havoc in your house, wanna make out later to make up for it?” “Fine but you also have to play three rounds of Call of Duty with me afterward”

They wouldn’t be romantic often but like highkey? I can see them throwing themselves into the line of fire for each other with a recklessness only they could survive

We can’t forget that Spencer is a more than 60,000-year-old overpowered demon/god/entity/thing, which, yes, could throw a slight wrench in this ship for multiple reasons, but I choose to make angst out of it instead.

Side note: Ghost is a chronic conspiracy theorist (and you can’t tell me otherwise) and every once in awhile Spencer will offhandedly say something like “Y’know I helped the Egyptians build the pyramids” and Ghost just goes fucking feral.

Look, I’m not saying Spencer IS touch-starved and most likely has issues creating and developing relationships and therefore avoids interpersonal connection, especially offline, but I AM saying he is prime material for it. (thats a lie thats exactly what shes saying don’t believe it) (I’m projecting okay dont judge me) (loser imagine projecting)

Imagine with me for a second: Why does Spencer willingly stay with a family who locks him in their basement with only minor complaining? He’s a near all-powerful entity just released into the world for Spence’s-sake - If he wanted to, there’s no telling what havoc he could wreak! So why doesn’t he? Why would someone so powerful, so terrifying, so dangerous that a group of people decided to seal him away forever stay with the first family he finds in sub-par conditions for years - especially someone who’s seen to be as high-maintenance as Spencer? Let me hit you with a theory: He’s chasing the feelings of validation, safety, and love - no matter how rarely it’s shown - that a family can provide. Being socially isolated for even a few years can do a number to a person’s psyche (I should know, I’m projecting onto this character right now), let alone thousands.

Now maybe Ghost can’t match thousands of years in isolation, but damn if he doesn’t have a few years of crippling loneliness on his record too.

I can see the two of them learning how to be vulnerable around others together, emotionally and physically; learning how to open up and how to talk through issues; and some third point, because points are better in threes.

(May I suggest that these losers are both trans but thats just me adding in my own projection lmao)

(You absolutely may)

Imagine the conversation thats just “so i have a murderer in my head thats an ass” “rip to u ig sounds like a you problem :///”

imo spence has trouble expressing emotions other than like,,, annoyance and haughtiness, its like sort of his go-to defence, so showing Ghost his emotions is a big step for him

I hear you, and i say yes good. (found this one headcanon that i kinda live by where he was uh, either autistic or adhd i dont remember but theres that too) OH yeah that would be at thing huh. Spencer: *is emotionally vulnerable @ ghost* ghost: oh shit im trusted??? Oh fuck uh.

Yeah so like…. Ghost and spence showing emotion at eachother is kind of :flushed: ghost be like: whats an emotion. Imagine having emotions fuciiing loser hhaha,,,, *laughs nervously*

Ghost is also very emotionally distant with most people so it would probably be like “what??? The fuck?? Emotions?????? You have those???”

Ghost and Spencer be like *gay*

So another idea is that maybe Spencer realizes Ghost doesnt play any games [like the uncultured SWINE he is] and decides he must [remedy] this and so he introduces him to like, nintendo first. (some bitches thought that said nintendo fortnite. Im bitches) and theyre playing like, mario kart or smash or smth and Ghost gets really [fuckin into it]

Ghost and spencer: *literally in eachothers laps playing fucking wii tennis*

Spooker: what are the- *TOAST FUCKING SLAPS A HAND ACROSS HIS MOUTH* shut up you dont wanna know what happens when its mentsonssbfdjfsd (sorry i had a stroke uwuwuwuw)

(Theyre in denial we don’t judge in this house)

They will not hesitate to play dirty either, they will straight up push each other over and vaguely flirt

Ghost is losing and straight up fucking goes “ur hot” and spencer actually dies and boom ghost is the winner. sparkle emoji Magic sparkle emoji

“I am Not a HomoSexual:™:” “Yeah, sure you aren’t” “Screw off”

Pet-names-ish: Asshole, Gaymer-Boy, casual insults, Mr. Spirit Bitch, Mistake, Loves Ghosts More Than His Boyfriend What A Fucking Loser aka Gay-ass

Pros:

They both open up a lot most likely. Gain someone to trust since they’ve sort of been through the same things (though on much different scales)

I can see soft hours of hanging in each other’s bedrooms

Spencer is a tsundere you cant tell me otherwise youre just a coward if you disagree

So is Ghost so this can only go well

Every time Ghost has to solve a case at the Acachallas Spence is just peaking out from his basement like “the fuck is this?? Hot Man??????”

Enemies to lovers 500k (Gets Hot and Steamy :flushed: NOT CLICKBAIT!!!!11!!!!! 18+!!!!!!! GAY LOVE StORY!!!!!!) Lemonz!!! Made from teh Sexiest of Wattpaders UWUWUWU YAOI Boys Love don’t like don’t read!! (this is so fucking stupid jkfnd) I hate this with a passion Q^Q. All my years of being a basic watpad fanboy have helped me to the moment i bring maddie to tears

The steam is just like,,,,, holding hands and being angy all the fuckin time the steam is literal because their anger translates into actual steam

Cons:

Their angst has nowhere to go and it just sits between them like two raccoons at a dumpster-style mexican standoff

They really start off hating each other huh. Like, I know this can still lead to healthy relationships but neither of them are very good at healthy relationships with people he hasn’t known for his Whole Life so that’s an Oh No.

They totally feed off of each other’s stupidity (but this could be seen as a pro too so take that as you will) as well as anger - im talking one-upping each other kinda shit

Its ridiculous honestly how intense it gets, like they straight up need intervention sometimes because they dont realize they can just STOP

Conclusions:

I think this would be a relationship that would that a lot of time and hard work to make work, but i think in the end it would be really super cute!! Like it would make no fuckin sense to anyone else but somehow they’d understand each other and help each other through their similar issues. Also theyre both big nerds in different ways and i think they’d have just ranting sessions back and forth over and over and it would be soft!!!!! So yeah, i think it would work, at least, i want it to :D

So. Maybe?? I feel like it could, but they’d need to work pretty hard to make it healthy and not constant fighting. Could be stupid amounts of cute and wholesome but also could be stupid amounts of oh no and pain, depending on how the two act. If they learned how to get along with each other and work past their differences it could be super cute and soft. Just a very, er, bumpy beginning. And middle. And end. (this makes me very nervous,,,,why did you mention an end) (wouldnt you like to know weather boy) (TvT) UFDUNS bumpy but soft . Agreeing with the loser gay, want this to work it’d be interesting :3

#spencer x ghost #jess writes #ishhhhh???????#venturiantale #venturiantale pie #johnny ghost #spencer acachalla #johnny toast #jimmy casket #fred spooker #let me know if you enjoyed this or not it was intense #sr #ship review #ship reviews #vt ships #vt ship reviews #vt ship review #vt sr

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crossedwithblue · 3 years

Note

tbh i had forgot the katara as jane i just remembered the zuko being stupid haha the post being ss well makes it great (i suppose they mean the narrative function of being the support and a contrast with lizzy. but yeah comparing her to katara who has such strong independence and standing up values sounds '???')

I read a lot zutara mainly because katara and aang getting together was always super uncomfortable to me

i am always here for Dumbass Zuko headcanons lmao. however I did unfollow that blog just the other day because while I love their art (give me allllllllll the accurately drawn PoC. if you draw PoC (or white people for that matter) as button-nosed instagram girls with dark skin and make no effort to learn how to actually draw different types of facial features i will come to your house and make you eat your wacom tablet and draw my giant nose and square jaw with pen and paper until you get it Right, there are enough resources about this and i am tired) I didn’t love their hot takes which I obviously did not want to say in the tags on their post but idk,,, I was getting this really bitter vibe from their meta, idk how else to explain it. I can understand being bitter about aspects of media you like and of course people are perfectly entitled to their opinions and headcanons, but I just don’t want that bitterness on my dash lol, I come to tumblr to shitpost and look at pretty pictures. and their opinions on zuko were definitely part of it bc they felt really unfair to me and the Pride and Prejudice post is def an example of something where I was just like ??? this makes perfect sense until I actually think about it at all?? why are you being mean to zuko for no apparent reason????? is it.... because he’s the only major character from the nation that is most similar to white colonising cultures, even though he’s doing the work to a) be aware of the colonising mentality he’s internalised and work on it and b) as the ruler of said nation, flag up and eradicate this mentality from his own country, which is evidenced by the FN’s policy of non-intervention in Korra (I think the almost-going-to-war plot in the comics was absolute bullshit by the way, like not its existence but just it not really being examined in that sense)? I am 100% here to examine those aspects of ATLA and again, I totally understand being bitter about them, but it just tires me out in a website I consider a leisure space

I do need to find more atla blogs to follow now, recs would be fab if you have any :)

oh yeah i basically dont ship any of the endgame ships (in ATLA, as you may guess from my header being Korrasami lol) because as i have said before, nobody needs to find their One True Love at the age of 13 lmao (i do kinda ship Suki/Sokka because they are a little older (still kids by our standards but most probably near adulthood by their own, if not actually adults in the full sense, and yes I do think cultural context matters when ascribing adulthood to people outside the modern West no matter what ‘you’re a baby until you turn 18 and then why don’t you instatnly have a job and a mortgage’ internet culture says) and their relationship is just so cute and feels really healthy to me idk we were Robbed of enough Suki screentime, we should have got more Suki and also she should have had her character explored a Lot more than Cool Ninja Feminist Gal) (also, witness the nested brackets, they are here)

I think a lot of people have issues with Zutara (and presumably by extension Zukka? though I haven’t seen this discussed as much or like. at all) because of the issues associated with essentially the heir to a colonizing empire which has decimated the culture of the indigenous-coded woman he’s being shipped with (im sure you’ve also seen those discussions if you’ve spent like. any time at all in ATLA fandom lol) which I... kinda have mixed feelings about, I’ve seen fics where it is definintely completely ignored and done really really badly but I have also seen fics where that conflict is a really essential theme and that’s been quite interesting (would recommend Southern Lights on AO3 if ou haven’t come across it before as a good example of that though it is very long and currently being updated (pretty regularly)). I feel like I’m too removed from that part of intercultural conflict that I have the right to comment on it, though I’ve definitely faced shades of those issues in the past, but I also feel like it’s potentially an example fo knee-jerk Tumblr purity culture to just say its Bad And Wrong so idk I’m conflicted.

In the politics of the world, I just don’t see how Katara being Fire Lady (ugh that’s a phrase that always makes me laugh, and not in a kind way), which is probs the most comon Zutara fic plot, would have Worked in any sense at all, and I definitely think she would have wanted to stay at he South Pole and rebuild her culture and bring bending back to them (as we see in the comics and obvs with her being Korra’s waterbending master iirc) and I can see Zuko wanting to help with that in whatever way possible because he rightly sees that as a really important part of the reparations owed by the Fire Nation. and obviously by the end of the series they were very good friends and definitely had better chemistry than fricking Kataang but yeah those reasons are basically why I don’t love Zutara but don’t necessarily hate it either

this was another ramble, not apologising for it this time because this is just what talking to me is like. I am very here for bringing back letter-writing because it lets me ramble to my heart’s content but also it would take up All My Time

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bondsmagii · 3 years

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2, 8, 26, 37, 38, 57, 72, 91, 94, 100

> questions to ask at 4:02am meme 🌕🌃

thank you!

2: Do you mourn for a place or person you’ve never known?

yes 😩 I can’t even adequately describe what’s going on here, but there’s a lot of people and a lot of places that feel familiar even if I don’t know them, if that makes sense? and there’s also a lot of people I could have become, and a lot of places I could have been, and I do have moments where I kind of mourn them even though I have no proof that they would have even existed in that specific way. I do think this is normal to an extent, but also I do this a lot, lol.

on a slightly less philosophical level, I of course mourn my older brother, who’s quite literally a person I never got the chance to know.

8: Do you think you can put love into categories (family, platonic, romantic, etc.) or is it just one general sensation?

oh man definitely. the love you feel for your friends isn’t the same love you feel for your spouse or your parents, and so on and so forth. there’s lots of different kinds of love, and lots of different levels within those types, and you’re also more than capable of feeling several different types and levels towards the same person, in my opinion. I don’t know if I would try and categorise everything, because something like love doesn’t really suit being shoved into boxes, but there are different types of love and I find it’s constantly shifting and changing along with you and the object of your love, which is cool.

I should add that I don’t find any one type of love more or less important than the others. seriously, destroy the idea that romantic love is the One True Love, and all other forms are somehow lesser. that’s just garbage.

26: What’s the most life-changing choice you’ve made so far?

this is kind of embarrassing but the truth often is: almost eight years ago I decided to make a sideblog on here that has... something to do with writing, let’s say, and something to do with... a certain character... and anyway that decision led to me meeting a certain person and going from awkward messages on Tumblr to awkward messages on Skype, to eighteen hour conversations and constant texting, to living in a car together for three months on a roadtrip and then living in a car together for many more months while homeless (and a million other places in between), to moving in together and then holy shit we got married.

so I guess that one impulsive decision to make a shitpost sideblog at stupid o’clock in the morning when I was bored one summer has been the single most life-changing choice I’ve ever made.

37: Do opposites attract?

eh. I mean, yeah, sometimes? but similarities attract, too. I think for any kind of relationship to be successful you’ve kind of got to have an element of both, and I think that “opposites” usually refers to something very specific. for example, I don’t mind cleaning the bathroom and you hate it. that’s a useful kind of opposite, because it means a compromise neither of us feel cheated by. you’re unshakable when it comes to slogging through bureaucratic minutiae, and I’m a beast in high-stress quick-thinking scenarios. together we make a pretty unstoppable team, for being opposites in that regard. I think that’s kind of what’s meant by this saying, but unfortunately it seems to have been appropriated to mean “yes honey, I know you work 10 hour shifts and come home to find your partner hasn’t cleaned the house or done anything to help, but opposites attract!” or “my partner supports Trump and genuinely believes that vaccines and masks are a government conspiracy to control us all, and I am a normal human being, but opposites attract so I guess I’ll have to put up with it”. like no, kings and queens. that isn’t what it means. dump them.

38: Is your life what you expected it would be five years ago?

lmao no. not in the slightest. five years ago it would have been... just into 2016, and yeah, no. there is not a single thing about me right now that I would have predicted, aside from the general stuff that’s never changed about me. I had different ideas about what I would be doing for work, about what I’d be working towards; I had completely different levels of commitment and discipline to various tasks, and I certainly wasn’t planning an international move. I can at least say that I’m happier with my current plan than the one I used to have (it wasn’t a bad plan, it just no longer suits me) but there’s no way I would have expected this.

and of course, there’s the whole issue with the pandemic. five years ago I had no idea I would be living through a global natural disaster, and if you’d told me, I would have thought it would be something like a supervolcano eruption or a nuclear winter. like, I’m glad it’s not, but also “you have to stay in your house for over a year” still kind of sucks.

57: Do you thinks humans are obsessed with escapism (books, video games, movies, etc.)? Are you looking for an escape? Do you think that’s a bad thing?

I think we are sometimes, when things are tough and there’s a need to wish to escape (see how many books I read over quarantine in March, for example). most of the time, however, I think humans just like stories. I don’t think it’s any deeper than the fact that humans love stories, we’ve always loved stories, we’ve always loved telling and hearing stories, before we had books and archives we passed our stories down orally and we drew them on cave walls with our own fingers, and this love for the story has never changed or altered in the hundreds of thousands of years since. I think that’s the major driving force here.

right now I’m looking for an escape 24/7, because I’m sick to death of the real world. I don’t think that’s a bad thing at all. without books, without the fictional things I love, without reading and writing and music, I would have gone absolutely bonkers in 2020. being able to fall into a book or play around in the worlds I’ve created, both my own and things I’ve co-written with you, has literally saved my ass over the past eight months. escapism is never a bad thing. like anything, it only becomes troubling when it starts creating problems. but I do not think there’s any shame in occasionally saying “fuck it” and going to worry about someone else’s fictional problems for a while.

72: Should people be prosecuted for crimes that weren’t considered crimes at the time?

this is a tough one. on the one hand I want to say no, because it could easily be abused. some asshole could get into power and make something illegal, and then round up all the people who have committed that now-crime and lock them up, and oh, would you look at that! all the people who have committed the now-crime just so happen to be the dictator’s biggest critics and threats, how convenient.

at the same time, dictators are going to wipe out their enemies no matter how legal it is, and I also have to consider the fact that before WWII, for example, words like “genocide” and “crimes against humanity” didn’t exist. how could we decide that these things are crimes, but then not try those who literally gave cause for the crime to be acknowledged? we can hardly say “alright, genocide is now a crime against humanity, but because these guys did it before this was law they can’t be tried”. that’s just... not really a great precedent to set, you know?

so I suppose a tentative yes? I think it would probably depend entirely on the severity of the crime. for example, if they found out that... I don’t know, some normal everyday substance was something that people could suddenly get high off, and they declared it a drug, I don’t think everyone who’s ever sold it or used it should be rounded up and jailed. but like, if the act of cannibalism itself became a crime (and not just murder or desecration of a corpse, which is what “cannibalism” usually falls under in terms of legality) we should probably go round up all the people who are stealing human legs to eat, yanno?

91: Is hate as strong as love? Who do you hate?

sick totheark reference bro. anyway yeah, hate is as strong as love, though it appears and reacts in different ways. hate and love are two sides of the same coin, if you ask me. the deeper you love somebody, the harder you hate them if things go wrong. hate is betrayed love. something something, a tree’s branches cannot reach to heaven unless its roots reach to hell, and all that. something so powerful is going to leave a lot of damage if it goes wrong.

I hate a few people. I don’t want to go into detail as to their specific identities, because I’m sure that if you know me well, you’ll know who they are. both of them were people whom I loved very deeply, and who betrayed that love in ferociously cruel ways. both people taught me very difficult lessons about the nature of love, and how sometimes it really cannot conquer everything, but while this would be a nasty lesson to learn it’s compounded by the fact that I learned this not out of any kind of extraneous circumstance, but rather through their cruelty and their refusal to work with me, listen to me, or love me in the way I deserved to be loved. my hatred for these people will never go away, even though it certainly doesn’t dominate my life. it is there, though, and I can easily draw on it whenever I need it. should I get the opportunity, I have no doubt in my mind that I have the capacity to be very cruel to these people in my own right, and I won’t feel bad about it.

94: How would you describe yourself when you love? Do you love forcefully, unconditionally, gently, quietly, desperately?

oh damn. forcefully, conditionally, stubbornly, and probably slightly possessively.

I don’t show love in conventional means. I’m one of those stereotypes, I guess. I don’t like declarations of love, I don’t really go in for physical affection, and I’m not sappy at all. my love language is more subtle, but it’s there. I like to do things for people, I like to create things for/with people, I like to have adventures with people. that’s how I love, and I can be pretty forceful about it. I also want people to improve themselves as much as possible -- I think the greatest thing I can witness someone I love doing is becoming the best version of themselves, and I will support them 100% in this effort -- also very forcefully. I don’t think there are many people who could put up with that level of intensity for so long, if I’m honest. I demand a lot of the ones I love, but I also like to think I give a lot, too.

my love is never unconditional. while I believe unconditional love exists, I have never seen it. my love always comes with conditions -- conditions about how I expect to be treated, about ideology, about worldview. these are all huge deal breakers, of course -- my conditions aren’t vague, or petty, or small in any way. but there is nobody on earth, nor will there ever be, who I will not walk away from if I feel the relationship is harmful in any way. I might not stop loving them, but I sure as hell will not assume that my love for them will protect me from them.

at the same time I’m a very stubborn person when it comes to love. people will do things they think must break one of my conditions, but I’ll see something else in it and I’ll stick around even if we both think it’s useless. I’m never wrong, so I suppose I have that going for me. but I am very, very stubborn when it comes to love. I have a high level of endurance and I know how to nurture love; how to stop pessimism from setting in. I’m also slightly possessive, so I don’t let go of anything easily -- and this includes the people I love. I’ll never stifle a person, but I’ll definitely fight for them, and something something everything I’ve ever let go of has claw marks on it.

100: What belief do you have that isn’t logically grounded, but you still firmly believe in?

I suppose something like this could never be logically grounded because there’s no logical proof at all, and “I Just Know” is apparently not a scientific argument (it should be), but I know I’ve had past lives. I just do. I have no solid proof for this, only gut feelings and Just Knowing and weird memories and some crazy shit that I can’t explain -- like being able to find my way around a strange city because I remembered it from a past life, for example -- but I just know I’ve had many different lives before and I will have many more to come. this is just an unshakable belief and it always has been.

#4:02am meme #long post #about me #vestriis #asks

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facelessxchurch · 4 years

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What we’re your thoughts about the book?

Some asks were answered already in this post already so I just smacked those asks in here at the part where I talk about the topic in question, which is why the answer may not 100% fit the question.

Massive “Seasons of War” spoilers below the cut:

First off, of all, this book read like GoT/any zombie movie ever. With the necromancers being like the white walkers, Vile is the night king and daugar are the wights. even with the necromancers crumbling away after Vile got killed Tell me I’m not the only one seeing that.

I think there was a lot of fanservice and some confirmed headcanons in the book, which I really liked. Saracen magic got revealed, there was a return to the Leibniz dimension, the Vile vs Vile fight so many wanted finally happened (tho that was kinda underwhelming) and the Dead Men returned which I’m sure made a lot of people happy.

Ravel poisoning Saracen during the war and Vile being so powerful bc of being dead were two popular headcanons that got confirmed. And I am personally so happy that this book killed the ‘there is no sarcasm in the Leibniz dimension’ headcanon bc I bloody hated that.

Finally, Landy tries to please the old fans instead instead of what feels like purposefully pissing them off. I guess the phase 2 book sales weren’t that great so far (nice try blaming it on the pandemic, but no).

I’m also glad that the romance in this book was kept to a minimum bc The Val/Militsa kiss in the beginning, yikes, fanfiction has better written kisses than that. And the the dialog for the lesbian love triangle (bc for some reason Ms.Wicked aka Laura’s self insert is Militsa’s ex??) was cringy and stiff as hell, it felt more like first graders trying to do a dramatic play and not natural at all.

Surprisingly enough Mevolent’s and Serafina’s relationship seems to be the most healthy and romantic in the entire series and I have no idea if that was on purpose or if Landy just has twisted views on relationships.

I however am actually kinda happy with how Mev was written. He was sympathetic and charismatic, tho some of the stuff he did doesn’t fit to they way he’s characterised when he’s on screen (I know he is probably lying 90% of the time he speaks, but still). Like, banning all languages apart from English doesn’t seem like something a man who cares about culture, literature and art would do. It also seems kinda stupid bc those languages will be forgotten eventually and if they need an old text translated no one will be able to do it. Also, why English? Isn’t Mev old enough that his first/original language should be Gaelic? So weird. I have the feeling this was mainly done so Valkyrie (and with that the audience) can understand what the people on the continent are saying bc I very much doubt she understands/speaks any languages apart from English.

But I loved that Mev was also shown as insanely smart. He managed to outsmart Val multiple times. And I love how he doesn’t need his magic to fight, how quick and agil and skilled he is. So I take it that his fighting style is more based on agility and not getting hit, and he uses brute force only when forced into it (by Darquesse/the Unnamed). I was wondering about that bc his armor is made of leather and chainmail instead of metal plates which is considered light armor and not something a tank type of fighter would wear.

What really rubbed me the wrong way tho was when he was talking Tanith and Skul and more or less stated the war wasn’t a challenge anymore ever since Skul died. Or when he was talking to Val being like ‘you’re more powerful than I could ever hope to be’.It bothers me even more knowing that Val is based on girlfriend!Laura. Does really everyone and everything in-vers, even a big bad like Mev, rub Skul’s/Landy’s and Val’s/Laura’s ego? Big yikes.

Crespular Vies is surprisingly fun. At first I thought the two men going after the Obsidian Blade were hired by the Unnamed, but since that wasn’t the case, I think Crespular Vines hired them that so he could show up in time to save Omen and his friends. I think him opening up to Omen about being Skul’s former partner came too unprompted, too quickly and that he is trying to gain Omen’s trust so he can get close to Skul through him. I think another giveaway that that’s the case is bc one of the men Omen had to meet to get his brother back wore a Cleaver outfit and Vies gave that man probably the same reasoning Omen gave him.

That said Omen’s chapters were surprisingly enjoyable. By what I had heard of others I expected a sad sack that can’t fight worth a damn.

I’m not found of the Temper/Kierre stuff, it came out of nowhere.

Val is overpowered AF, it seems that she can get on Darquesses level with more practise/learning how to keep the doors open. She certainly needs to be nerfed.

Also I skipped the Darquesse chapters bc I’m giving negative fucks about her and the plague doctor.

The last 10% of the book were too rushed and felt like half finished thoughts.

Also I was kinda really bothered by the citizen of the Leibniz dimension. They were cartoonishly racist and it was very pretty black and white for the most part AKA everybody good is in the Resistance and all other sorcerers are evil/corrupt. That is also shown by there being children in the Resistance camp while there was no mention of children in the mage cities. In reality, most people are fairly mellow and it’s just a small percentage that is either really good or really wicked. I would have liked to see more racism towards mortals in form of apathy or ‘the soft bigotry of low expectations’ like I’ve seen it from Serpine in DotL. You know, make it a little less black and white.

Also, I understand the mermaids, but the bats in Europe were random AF. Like, I would understand it if they were just in Romania/Transylvania as a nod to the Dracula-typ vampire legends originating from there. As a plot-device they weren’t really needed to keep the protagonists from flying bc the danger of getting spotted by necromancer by doing so should be enough of a threat to keep them on the ground. This might seem nit-picky of me, but the bats just seemed so bloody random to me like wtf????

And also bc I’m a slut for magical creatures, I would have really liked to see more of them than just daugar and giant bats. Some undead cut together and resurrected necromancer experiments would have been pretty cool tbh. Like whatever the hell this is.

Something like zombie bears would have also been acceptable, I mean, bears are fucking terrifying on their own, let alone when undead and decaying.

I’m kinda pissed at China that she wanted Skul to kill Nef, but it does seem in character. Of course I still don’t like it bc I headcanon as Nef, Eliza and China having been besties during the war (no matter what canon says, I’m keeping that headcanon). I’m surprised Skul didn’t let Wreath have Nef considering that. Then again, he thought Nef might still be useful. And he was right. I loved how Nef actually had an essential part in saving the world by throwing the bomb. So proud of my boi <3 But Skul refused to kill him even after that. Could it be that Skul is finally getting character growth and development? 👀

Aaaand, China’s continuing to be a tyrant. With Tanith’s sense of justices flaring up shown when he killed the city governor, Erato, and Nef being shown to go after people that betray him (Lorien) I think those two are being set up to go after China to kill her (and to probably kill Creed too). Imagine Eliza joining the team bc she want a piece of China too.

I feel sorry for Baron, but at least he got a few speaking lines this time around. Still, I really wanted Nef to save him. :C Like, he suffered so much before he died too considering he spend a year alone starving and thirsty with broken legs in the middle of nowhere wft, why is Baron getting fucked over like this? #BaronDeservedBetter2020 he is the only honorable person of all faceless followers and he’s the one that gets screwed over in every book he shows up in, why tho- 😭

Speaking of Nef, I absolutely loved him in this book, he was a delight and stealing the show whenever he was on the page, despite being used as punching bag through pretty much the entire book. If people have always treated him that way I can see why he turned evil jfc that poor man. Despite that, he was still being such a clever, funny and relatable bae <3 He’s described as ‘cynical, and nasty but also kinda cheerful’ and as liking to ‘needle’ people (aka trolling and roasting) by Val and that essentially describes every shitposter on the internet ever. And I so loved the way he roasted Saracen lmao

And how he’s so clever, like the Lorien part was my favourite scene closely followed by how Nef essentially talked Remus Crux into getting himself killed, just 👌 smart snek boi, I love him <3 Also I hope he keeps poisoning everybody thoughts against Skul like how he had already been doing it to Tanith, he’s poison in human form and that’s just my jam.

That obedience bracelet was kinda fucked up tho.

Why does this thing even exist? Aren't electro shocks or any other form of pain enough instead of shutting his nervous system down/rendering him completely defenceless? I feel like some messed up mage 100% used it to keep himself (sex) slaves at some point in time :/ Landy might have gotten that idea from some fucked up hentai. Even the implications of the name "obedience bracelet".... I can’t be the only one that got creepy perv vibes from that thing, right?

Btw what the fuck happened to Harmony? You know, Leibniz Serpine’s girlfriend. She hasn’t been mentioned again. Did she die? She didn’t seem too found of him in DotL, was she plotting against him and he found out about it, killed her and fled the Resistance? Or did she die prior to him leaving and it was part of the reason he left bc she was the only thing that had tied him emotionally to the Resistance?? Or Landy just forgot she existed. I would not be surprised.

Of course my biggest issue with this book was how he retconned Nef’s magic and how he took his trademark, his red hand, away, but more about that in a different post.

TL;DR: Nef was a delight even though he was done dirty. Mev’s scenes were a 50/50 split between good and bad. I actually liked the Crespulare and Omen chapters. The Unnamed was a disappointment. The last 10% of the book were to rushed and the final fights that were supposed to be the biggest were underwhelming. The rest is meh, didn’t really care tbh. Let’s be real here, I only bought this book bc Nef played a bigger role in it, anyways.

#skulduggery pleasant #seasons of war #seasons of war spoilers #review #book review #I hate 'read more'#but this got so bloody long #RIP mobile users #long post #Anonymous #answered

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