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secretgamergirl · 6 months

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A Teachable Moment

So I hopped into some freshly minted Discord server, maybe a month ago, and the norms of it still haven't settled into place. It's open to the public and focused on a game, so there's a bit of a mixed crowd, let's say, and prior to the incident I'm setting up the backstory for, there hasn't really been a test of their ability to moderate their damn public spaces.

Also when I say there's a mixed crowd I mean there's both a good number of trans women (because if you are making a deep game for a niche audience, we're gonna make up a shockingly high percentage of that audience every time), and a few right-wing extremists doing their best to "hide their power levels" (because if you create and promote literally any sort of social space, they WILL show up to test for whether local conditions are suitable enough to build a nest). In the early days of things they mostly kept their masks on aside from using the nazi frog as a reaction image to things (which IS something everyone should have a zero tolerance policy towards, but I feel like I need to know someone fairly well before I can explain that one), and their eyes lighting up when they see the server rules include "no politics" (a perfectly fine policy to have but you need to understand that if you post it you WILL have to constantly ban nazis who think you're using "politics" like they do- a euphemism for all the people they want dead).

Anyway, there's a few people on my radar here, but everyone's been civil enough, and it's a pretty relaxed vibe. Pretty quiet. Mostly just icebreaker talk. The most prolific poster is this one guy who saw there was a pet photo channel and just kinda sat down and made a point of posting several images a day to it, of a particularly uncommon sort of cute pet. Naturally this lead some people to ask some follow-up questions about whether these are his and how long he's had them, and this yielded the pretty damn weird in retrospect response that no, he has no pets at all, but would like one of these some day.

Now, this isn't at all the main thrust of this, and I wouldn't like, start keeping vigil for this as a sign of troublemakers, but a thing that undercover bigots do all the time as can be seen here is set up in a community and just kinda spam harmless generic platitudes and such to try and establish themselves as a known chill person. This goes double for anywhere that has a general public/trusted community members split. Never just go by "well he seems pretty chill" for giving people access to more private spaces, they can wait as long as they need, generally, as long as they don't have to improvise a normal person response to a situation where bigotry is in play.

Anyway, getting to the main event, a few days ago in this server, someone posted some cute little comic which... you know let me just find it.

Clever little subversion there. Got a polite chuckle out of the bulk of those paying attention, but seeing a nice wholesome bit of trans positivity incensed pet-poster guy, who immediately shouts "I've seen another version of that comic!" and posts a variation I am absolutely not going to share where the girl in the last panel is dead.

That is as clear cut of a do not pass go, do not collect $200, ban that piece of garbage permanently without a word and delete the post as soon as you can before anyone has to see that sort of hate directed at them offense in absolutely any community. Even moreso in this case as in the time it took a moderator to notice, this creep was going full mask off and responding to everyone's horrified reactions with grotesque anti-trans propaganda of a particularly hardcore "my other hangouts have openly posted swastikas" variety.

Here, people did delete the profoundly offensive comic, but then, to be blunt, otherwise handled this like a kindergarten teacher seeing a kid grab the blocks another kid was playing with and just nonchalantly explaining some basic manners. First off, nobody goes that hard on hate speech accidentally, and more importantly, showing a lack of willingness to dole out any real consequences for such an open act of hate has an emboldening effect. Sure enough the other sleeper agents present jumped up to try and push things farther, encouraging them to also remove the comic above, ban any mention of trans people, and jump the gun with prepared responses that don't work in context (you call everyone you don't like a nazi! Both sides are wrong! etc.).

I came pretty close to just quitting the server on response to that, but stuck it out a bit to double check if this wasn't just one particularly green mod trying to put the fire out before double checking if that's ban worthy when someone else was awake, or if I needed to explain the code-talk in the following conversation, or hell, if they just need more mods. I'm decidedly overqualified for that sort of thing.

Anyway, moderation policy handled that poorly... and to be clear, I'm not pinning that on any one person, basically everyone who ends up in a position of authority has a gut instinct to moderate as laxly as possible and needs some real training, reading, or tragic experience to learn how vital a firm swift hand is if you don't want people like this to show up and drive everyone else away. Especially not going to put this on the one green volunteer awake at 4 AM or whatever.

Still, the ball was dropped here, and I was pleasantly surprised to see how the rest of the community stepped up to hold their ground. Over the next couple of days, people just started casually dropping every cute trans positive thing they had handy in there, agreeing with each other that it was all nice and sweet. This both reestablished that chat as a relatively safe place to exist with a kind general vibe, and really got under the skin of these mask off nazis who started throwing tantrums. Apparently they just started privately messaging the mods to flag every single wholesome little image or comic as offensive to the point where people higher up the food chain came in, did some more serious reprimanding, and added an explicit policy against transphobia to their TOS... and threatened to ban these people if they pull this crap again.

Now, that increased firmness plus the community in general making it pretty damn clear they don't tolerate hate does seem to have scared the bigots into hiding (the one guy made this pathetic desperate effort to retake power by threatening to stop posting the animal pictures... that he's just pulling out of an image search, it was pretty funny), but... they're still there. The people they were threatening both broadly and as specific individuals still have to be careful not to share anything these scumbags can screencap and weaponize against them, and I'm sure at some time in the future when it's clear there's no mods awake they're going to pipe back up to do as much damage as they can in a blaze of glory if spying on all the queer people doesn't pay out for them, so while it is nice to see how just actively rejecting this sort of ideology can at least temporarily shut this crap down even without people in authority taking real action, I want to reiterate what responsibilities those in authority are neglecting here.

As a moderator of literally any sort of space, your basic duties are to keep things safe and to keep things civil. Those are two separate duties. Don't ever try and merge them together, and don't ever forget that safety must always take priority over civility.

If you see a situation where people are just getting randomly heated and angry over something inconsequential (happens a lot), yes, by all means, try to just deescalate things by stepping through just taking a stern tone, formal warnings, timeouts, 3 strike rules, temporary bans, etc. These are situations where we can hope that people who otherwise get along just let their emotions get out of hand and will hopefully shake hands and make up after having some time to cool off.

If on the other hand you see a situation where someone is threatening/antagonizing/intimidating someone else, especially in a case like this where the reason is transparently that the offender is a bigot who genuinely wishes harm or death on the target, there are no steps to escalate through. You remove the dangerous person from the community immediately, no exceptions, no warnings, no escalating response scale. That nazi posting crap about trans women in nooses, Jews in ovens, black people holding spears, women being raped etc. is not a friend having a rough day. There can be no reconcilliation no matter how much time you give. You just have a predator here to whittle your community down, and a vulnerable person who needs you to reassure them that they are safe in your community. The only option that should be on the table is the permanent zero appeals ban, and you should have no hesitation in deploying it.

Oh and here's the part where I remember that I am going to lose my home by the end of the year if I don't ask people to throw more money at me (this is a link). I hate doing this, but my other options for income went up in flames so completely I don't even know how to start to rebuild.

#moderation #safety

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princess-of-the-corner · 5 months

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One thing to note about RWBY is that it REALLY "grew the beard" over the course of its runtime.

Volumes 1-3 were animated in Poser (software that wasn't intended for use in animation), with rougher backgrounds and more simplistic writing related to complex themes. They were also only ever intended to be an extended prologue to the ACTUAL show, with the Big Twist of the Volume 3 finale being that the climax was actually just the inciting incident to the show's ACTUAL conflict.

Starting from Volume 4, the crew switched to Maya (software that's intended for use in animation), got better at writing more complex topics (the White Fang is treated more sympathetically than in the "Beacon Arc"), and Jaune was actually an interesting character for the entirety of the "Anima Arc" that lasted from Volumes 4-6.

Volume 7 is probably the best season of the show (I don't have a Crunchyroll account and so I haven't had the chance to watch Volume 9 in its entirety yet, even if I know what happens there). It deconstructs the whole "America Saves the World" trope with Atlas, and has some pretty good political satire that wound up being eerily prophetic. Also, Robyn Hill is one of the best characters the show has ever introduced.

Volume 8 contains both the best and worst moments of the series. V8C1-V8C11 features some of the best storytelling and most tense action from the franchise ever, but V8C12 has the overall message of "Okay but, the people who dehumanized Penny over her mechanical body KINDA had a point, let's fix what isn't broken!", V8C13 is a pretty descent villain episode, and V8C14 is by far the most offensive piece of media I've ever been subjected to. But still, up until those last three episodes, it was basically flawless.

I've heard Volume 9 is pretty good, but I'm side-eying everything involving Jaune because I honestly DESPISE the direction they took his arc in. But if we ignore EVERYTHING related to Jaune's role in the Volume, I like basically everything I've heard about it.

RWBY: After the Fall is a very good spin-off novel focused on popular side characters Team CFVY and shows what they've been up to since the Fall of Beacon in Volume 3. it also has a really interesting gimmick, as every other chapter is a flashback to something that happened in Team CFVY's past, further fleshing out their minor roles in the show.

RWBY: Before the Dawn is actual garbage. Sun's character arc (wherein his hypocrisy from the show is actually acknowledged and challenged) and Coco's and Velvet's shiptease are probably the only redeeming qualities. Taking this book into account actually makes Ironwood's reluctance to call Vacuo for help look REASONABLE. 2/10.

RWBY: Roman Holiday is a prequel novel focused on Roman and Neo, but Neo is the true protagonist here. The first few chapters leading up to their first meeting alternate between their perspectives, with the book being largely Neo focused after they finally meet.

RWBY: Fairy Tales of Remnant is an anthology of in-universe fairy tales. You can read it at any point in the series, but the further into the series you are when you read it, the more hints to RWBY's overarching plot you'll notice. While all of the Fairy Tales are works of fiction, some of them are dramatizations of actual events in the shadow war that RWBY's plot revolves around.

RWBY x JL: Super Heroes and Huntsmen is a 2-part film series wherein Team RWBY teams up with the Justice League. Part 1 features the Justice League visiting Remnant (kinda) during the events of Volume 7, and Part 2 features Team RWBY visiting DC Earth after the events of Volume 9.

There's also some ambiguously canonical comics published by DC, as well as 2 explicitly non-canon RWBY/DC crossover comic series. One features alternate versions of the Justice League cast who were born on Remnant, another features Remnant and DC Earth fusing due to Salem tricking Lex Luthor into helping her by playing off of his hatred of Superman. Neither of these crossovers are in continuity with the crossover movies.

Fascinating actually

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mshyde · 2 years

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why do you feel for riordan the way people feel for rowling? Is he known to be a bigot?

This is mostly a me-thing, I would like to clarify that not everyone who defends Rowling is going to agree with me (or even care about this lol). But I mean exactly that, I feel about Riordan the way "woke" liberal current lit stans feel about JKR.

Why do I feel for Riordan the way people (in particular, TRAs) feel for Rowling? While I find PJO entertaining and regard it with nostalgia wrt being a big series from my childhood, the books don't bring much to the table. Now that Rowling's cancelled, people love to bring down Harry Potter and call it useless, overrated, or even ideologically antiquated. But... what's new and fresh about Percy Jackson? And I find it apt to compare it to Harry Potter, in this case. Now, keep in mind that The Lightning Thief came out in 2005 and HP and the Philosopher's Stone in 1997. Let's do a "blind" recap:

White boy with messy black hair and green eyes who grew up in an abusive environment finds out the truth of his parentage is not what he's been led to believe. He goes on to a magical training place (which will feel like a home to him) where a famous, old, and experienced teacher introduces him to his new power and what it means for him. He has two friends: a goofy/comic relief type of guy, and a girl who is usually described around two characteristics: her great intelligence, and her hair. He doesn't know it yet, but his life is defined by a prophecy that seems to hinge on his death, but against all odds, he lives.

What am I describing? PJO or HP? Well, guess what! It's both. Also, while not exactly the same, your godly parent claiming you and you going to your special cabin based on that is quite similar to the sorting hat placing you in Gryffindor. I know that is quite generic nowadays (mostly because Rowling made the blueprint and everyone else copied off her - Roth with Divergent and the factions, Bardugo with the Grisha Orders, in a way even Collins with the THG Districts, although if her work is far superior to anything else discussed here), but the similarities are glaring, they are there, and they annoy me.

Riordan kills off his women for male angst (Bianca Di Angelo, arguably Zoe Nightshade). He's got an entirely main white cast in which most characters of color are secondary and killed off, or villains, or both (Kelly the empousa, Chris Rodriguez, Zoe Nightshade, Charles Beckendorf, Ethan Nakamura...). All of his characters are straight (with the exception of Nico, who's only revealed to be gay when he's forced to come out seven books after he's introduced, in the sequel series). Literally nothing about PJO is revolutionary, new, or modern. Do NOT come at me talking about Heroes of Olympus, or, god forbid, Trials of Apollo, because if that's how you like your "representation" then I don't want your garbage. Even the Kane Chronicles are... not It (13 year old girl dating a fusion of an immortal god with a 17 year old, anyone?).

Is [Riordan] known to be a bigot? No, but he should. Specifically, because of his racism and his homophobia. His article/essay defending his writing of Piper Mclean and Samirah al-Abbas (characters from later series) should've gone as viral in lit circles as Rowling's "biological sex is real and it matters" did. Instead, in recent years, he's gotten Stonewall awards and all kinds of praise for half-assed, shitty, pathetic, offensive, badly-written "representation".

He's also a lesbophobic piece of shit.

#i stand with jk rowling #anti rick riordan #the only thing i'll give riordan is that by my comparison he made 'harmony' canon #12 year old me hated romione </3 #hyde.txt #i literally hate him the way gendies hate rowling. that's the only way i know how to put it.

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alatismeni-theitsa · 3 years

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Idk about you, but what I love most about Americans is how they explain our own history to us and refuse to accept that some of the shit they produce are offensive. Prime example is Lore Olympus, where the creator gives zero shits about the opinions of Greek people but it's generally done with every single (usually ancient) Greek piece of media.

I've had people tell me I'm wrong for wanting the Greek gods to look Greek. Why are they so insane?

They have this problem because they follow the mindset "Greek mythology = American White things, and we have to sUbVErT American White things. It's so white, it's so booooring!" That's why they don't do the same with almost every other ancient pantheon in the world. They don't see it as product of White Culture (ew, this term....) so they don't have touch it.

Meanwhile, they feel SO comfortable with changing everything about an ancient pantheon from a foreign culture 2000 years later, as if the previous history and depictions didn't matter.

"The Greek gods belong to all of us", yes, so every other pantheon, with that logic. I don't see folks adding a North Native American looking person to the Nigerian pantheon..

For some reason they also seem to think that if you're not an oppressed minority in the US, you shouldn't have any problem with the changes. But... the world is not the US! The US exports media to the whole world and that's why they should be careful when they behave as if their demographics are the only ones that matter.

"But the ancient Greeks did-" YOU ARE NOT an ancient Greek! You are VERY removed from our heritage and these people! Greeks are not ancient Greeks either and that's why, in serious works or works that have serious monetization, we don't touch certain things because there is heritage behind them! (I am not talking about a fanfic obviously)

Greeks didn't have a problem with how the Greek pantheon looked either (for millennia) before 21st century Americans told them how "non diverse" the pantheon was. Even today Greeks who have no idea about internet American discourse (aka 70% of the country and maybe more) think it's simply crazy for Americans to come and change what we don't want to change. And this also goes for how the gods behave in modern fictional stories.

"But why is this an issue?"

Because as a people you've made billions from books, movies and comics from a vital part of our culture with the most inaccurate shit and straight up offensive stuff towards the gods and the Greeks (exotization and not listening to us). Greeks automatically consider most US American big media on Greek mythology garbage in quality, if that tells you anything. Now some other creators in other countries have followed suit and it's even more unpleasant.

It would be unnatural if we didn't talk about it.

"Why don't you make your own media and leave us alone?"

That's funny because not only we don't have the budget (they know shit about Greece) and we are a turd compared to the US industry, but this phrase is also similar to the one famous writers use when they don't write a demographic well. "Well no problem I misrepresented X group. This group should write their own stories with good representation!" Yes, but you have immense influence so you also need to learn how to write the group respectfully!!

#answered #greek speaks #greek representation

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popculturebuffet · 2 years

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The Punisher (2001) #16 and 17 Review: The One Where Frank Castle Does Violence to Wolverine’s Testicles (Comission for WeirdKev27)

Hello all you happy people. And for those just scrolling by the punisher, wolverine or x-men tags and wondering “wait did this actually happen” Yes, yes it did. This story not only happened but somehow Frank Castle taking a bat to Wolverine’s junk after making him look like a partially unfinished terminator is NOT the weirdest thing in this story. So if that’s got you hooked welcome, i’m jake, I review comics and animation and today we got a weird one and just in time too.

See over the last week i’ve dealt with a lot. Last friday Bobbi, a woman who was like a third mother ot me, always there for me and mom, always nice, always taking us out to dinner.. passed away from cancer. It has been a hard week, harder still since I was SUPPOSED to have cut my schedule back by a day.. but the grief over the situation hit me so hard last week I had to push the watchmen review back to this week. So ending it by having a laugh at a so bad it’s good comic by a guy who actively hates superhero comics to an absurd degree, it helps honestly. I needed to review some garbage that dosen’t offend me on a deep level and is instead just fun to point and laugh at, and these issues delivered.

So some backstory for those just joining us: Late last year I covered the fourth volume of The Boys Comic Book. It was a work I had avoided for years due to being an overly cynical, overly edgelord, and overly half assed deconstruction of superheroes by a man who openly did not grow up with them, does not like them and does not want to get how they work. As such I had to deal with panels.. like this.

(Not from the arc but I read all four volumes up to it so it goes in there)

I had to put up with this for THIRTY ISSUES to have proper context. This comic was worse than I could’ve imagined.

So the reason I bring this up besides to let you feel my pain is that to properly research for this tire fire, I read this very arc i’m reviewing today for research, as I had heard ennis hated wolverine so much he had an arc where he gets his face shot off, gets hit in the junk, gets his dong shot, and then gets run over by a steamroller. And yes.. all that happens. This arc is a petty, spiteful take that at a character garth dosen’t like to glorify a character he idolizes. It is also incredibly stupid, mildly offensive, and insane in a way that really puts his “comics aren’t realistic but punisher is” brand of nonsense in perspective. And i’ll show you why under the cut as we point and laugh at Garth Ennis to show people why his hero is better than yours.

So before we dive in, I should give my thoughts on what I think of the Punisher and Wolverine himself.

For the Punisher.. i’m not a fan. He CAN be used well as seen when he intersects with daredevil, and i’ve LIKED some punisher runs. I still want to read war journal as what I have is really good, Ennis MAX run ironically enough is a brilliant decounstruction of the character , paticuarlly the bonechilling vietnam set “born” mini series that kicks it off, and while his other works are mostly questionable, I loved Matthew Rosenbergs run. The character can be well written and engaging... but he’s just not for me.. as for why it’s mostly a prefrence thing. I’m just not into taxi driver style dives into a bad man on the edge shooting people. I CAN enjoy psychlogical character pieces, I absolutely love american psycho for that, and darker subject matter.. but the punisher just never clicks for me. It’s all mostly just a cycle of examining a bad man doing thigns to worse men with no real change or upheavel. While given his recent work i’m not sure he can pull it off, at least jason aaron is trying something new making him head of the hand. Outside of some dallances with being a franketein or a war machine, Frnak’s really just stuck in a never ending feedback loop of misery. And while granted most heroes are prone to resetting, it’s a sad fate of comic books, frank is the most frustrating; He will NEVEr answer for the shit he’s done and given he could easily be replaced by someone else with a hard past in a gun, I don’t get why. If you like Punisher, tha’ts fine, good for you. But he’s not for me. With that said I did judge this comic fairly, as I said I liked ennis other punisher work and the character can be written well. This is just not one of his better stories.. and he’s been an angel once so that threshold is vast. Next up is

Who I do like quite a bit. Given i’m a fan of the x-men this shoudln’t be a huge suprise but while he’s not one of my personal faviorite mutants like say Cypher, Sunspot, Multiple Man, Strong Guy, Wolfsbane, Scarlet Witch (She’s still one to me dammit), Warlock or everyone’s faviorite sexy murder gilf Magneto, but I still like Logan quite a bit. He’s a character with a lot of intresting angels to approach from: he can be a man struggling with the beast within, a man whose lived a thousand lives and either has to recover them, reckon with them, or LIVE with those memories in the past few decades. On a team he’s invaluable, often serving as the suprising blunt voice of reason, willing to say shit people won’t or confront them and keep them honest, while also being a man so willing to stand up for his convictions he’ll split the x-men in half if that’s what it takes. I will concede though he’s very much a character whose tolerablility varies on thew riter: the good ones do the things I said above.. the bad ones will either reduce him to grumbly snikit man with no limits to who he won’t skewer instead of gneinely limiting it to what’s ABSOLUTELY necessary, or in worst cases have him try to murder a 15 year old time displaced cyclops because the future one, WHILE POSSED BY THE PHOENIX FORCE MIND YOU, killed Charles. Despite being a TEACHER. I.. I do not look forward to the inventible day I have to unpack the shit show that is All-New X-Men. But on the whole he’s a strong character and as we’ll get to in just a sec, Ennis REALLY dosen’t understand that nor did he care to.

Before we get to that though we have our setup: The Punisher has, as he helpfully puts it himself so I don’t have to read the 15 issues prior, recently thrown the east coast mob into chaos: After taking down the head, Tony Casino, the body is left fighting amongst themselves in chaos.. which naturally benfits frank as it makes him easier to wipe out his preferred prey when their confused and makes things safer when they can’t function properly. One of the remaning sub-bosses though, Big Tony Grigorio, is making some actual headway to getting everyone together so Frank plans to make his brains come apart.. only to find the place already massacred with all the legs sawed off. Ain’t that just the way? You break into a mob hangout to shoot them all up and someone’s taken all the fun out of it. And if you think there’s a mop in the punisher’s battle van.. well there is but it’s sure as hell not for this. It’s for keeping that van impaculate and choking info out of people, like all mops.

The next scene we enter the wolverine..and if you’ve never read this issue before.. you aren’t prepared for the delightfully stupid clusterfuck that is Garth Ennis’ Wolverine

OKay so as you might of noticed Wolverine sounds like the lovechild of The Ultimate Warrior and Scott Stieiner and is half as coherent. Ennis’ Wolvie is a rambly weirdo who won’t shut up, kills people over minor disputes, and calls himself the canucklehead for some reason, a phrase I don’t belivie has EVER been used for the character and if it has it’s not enough to warrant use this much in a parody. Seriously he calls himself that.

Ennis’ wolvie TRIES to be a parody, Ennis trying to show how Wolvie just isn’t a good character and here’s why Punisher is better. And you CAN have your characters show why their better: one of the most famous superman stories “Whatever Happened To Truth, Justice and the American Way” is like that, having Superman fight a pastiche of the authority while showing why he still matters. But this isn’t a discussion on why a type of hero still works despite some audeinces finding him tiresome, or WHY wolverine might not work. This is a man getting paid actual dollary doos to write n edgelord fanfic about why wovlerine sucks.

These issues try to sell it as frank is better.. but to even attempt so they essentially reset Wolverine to what he was like when he first joined the x-men. And make no mistake Early Wolverine is a massive walking erection who will kill anyone friend or foe and is barely kept in check by cyclops> Case in point here’ shim nearly murdering what would become one of his best friends over the dumbest reasons imaginable.

Yes that REALLY happened. and yes wolverine was a swaggering, chatty jackass who tried to murder a friend. The thing is.. he GREW from there. He slowly grew to care for his teamates, with again the guy he just tried to carve up like an mmmm turkey being one of his best pals to this day. He tried to reign himself in, slowly making it clear he hated being a savage beast of a man but had resigned himself to it. But it was also clear there was more to him: he had a snarky side, was loyal, and when backed against the wall in the dark phoenix saga, helped turn the tide against the hellfire club. This all cumilated in the classic Wolverine mini by Claremont and Miller, where Wolverine was driven to his lowest and forced to accept he truly was a man, defining his character forever after. Wolverine is a man who both struggles not to kill.. but accepts sometimes he must so the others don’t have to. While Frank Castle kills because he has a driven obession he needs health with and won’t stop till he’s dad, Logan does it so his friends will never have to become what he’s been forced ot be his whole life, and sometimes questions if he should even go that far. It’s who he is.

And just to make sure Garth hadn’t just been commenting on a recent trend I peeked at a few issues of his solo, both form the time and a few years before that, just to see if this parody had any weight based on comics I hadn’t reader, and they are as follows for transparency purposes:

150, 158 (A Raptor), 189, 145, 131, 145, 147, 176, 181

And not only was Logan’s characterization consistent despite four or five diffrent writers, but the one time he was unstable.. was when he had been going feral for several months anyway, and was so laid low he was willing to work with apocalypse, itself not the best metric. And I checked some late 90′s x-men comics too just to be sure and while they aren’t the comics finest hour, still not rambling snikit bub. X-Men (Adjetivless to make sure logan was in it) 65, 74, 106, and 108. And as for the main title at the time of this book.. that waas New X-men.. which i’ve not only covered the three arcs of but was one of my faviorite comics... so yeah Garth isn’t even parodying some new phnemonion he stumbled acrossed. He made a judgey assumption instead of actually picking up a single issue of x-men or wolverine. And look it was the early 2000′s, i’m aware trades were in their infancy if they existed at all, and getting back issues probably wasn’t INCREDIBLY easy.. but Ennis has said himself on the boys that working at the big two he got to see plenty of comics, and given this was post comic bust it wouldn’t be THAT hard to say, go into a comic shop, check out the bargin bin and swipe a few issues of wolverine to check to see if your justified, especially since this is a CANON story starring this character. I’m mildly suprised he even got away with this, with the x-office not even bothering ot check what he was doing. I get punisher was overseen by marvel knights.. but marvel knights was canon. Karen Paige’s death has stuck with daredevil ever since and Black Panther still once beat Mephisto after he tricked a guy into selling his soul for some pants.

So there is NO excuse for not telling the x-office “hey is it cool of Garth fucks with your bread and butter? Kay thanks” The only reason the suprise is mild .. is that comic books have done this shit since time began. Simply allowed a character be poorly portrayed by a book or creator because of artstic lisence, the creator being a big deal or simply not giving a flying Liefield what someone does as long as the book makes money. No one CARED Logan would be portrayed like this because he still had his books and they still had their money and that’s sad. You should take more pride in your work than what money it makes you. I’m getting 10 bucks for this, but i’m doing this because I wanted to and i’m proud of what i’ve written thus far. I took the time and effort to again pick some issues at random and make sure wolverine really DIDN’T talk like this and that garth REALLY didn’t have a point. And it’s more time than garth, any of the editors on this, or anyone who worked on this artists, inkers down took to actually think about how terribly half assed this version of wolverine is and how it’s not some clever deconstruction but just stupid. It’s just dumb. Just a raging fanboy pointing out how much a character he dosen’t like blows and it shoudln’t of gone to print that way. Garth Ennis, Marvel, and The Punisher all can and have done better.

Anyways now we’ve got the analysis squared away I can have fun with just how gloriously, stupidly insane this story and the old canucklehead are. So for the crime of some asshole at a bar calling him short, seriously that’s what kicked things off.. he darth vader’s the guy’s hand, then procedes to massacre the bar. Because when I think beserker rage I don’t think fighting goons for an evil clandestine orginzation, nazis or sentinels.. no I think a bunch of drunks in a bar Logan wouldn’t bother to actaully use his claws on if this comic didn’t come off like it was written with the magic of cocaine.

So while this fracas goes on someone kidnaps the guy Frank was after later.. and chainsaws his legs off, as Wolverine can hear the chainsaw.. granted he does have hightned hearing, so that is possible it’s just.. weird these guys you know.. DID THIS IN THE BACK OF A CROWDED BAR. They clearly have sound baffling but like.... we see right after this they have a hidden tourture lair, with a LOT of kidnapped men literally cut down to the knees. So there’s NO reason to do it on site except the script said so and Garth was too busy focusing on ways to make wolverine sound like someone put ants in his brain to actually make the plot.. you know.. make sense. Oh also Pete, the guy that was kidnapped, plans to wait on his brother paulie.. only for him to show up .. like this

And trust me folks.. you aren’t ready for the expination. Anyways Frank talks to his informant Soap, a former fbi man turned second rate Barbra Gordon who tells our protaganist that 8 other mobsters have been captured.. and might still be alive.

So Frank naturally goes to a strip club for his next move

And after casing the joint finds everyone knocked out via gas, and the music having been used to cover up the chainsawing leaving a bunch of legs and a blood trail. Canucklehead follows the same trail... and also makes an intresting comment

Yes but single amputatoin is fine.. I think Frank is trying to make him a hypocrite but again had to write Logan so out of character as to massacre a bunch of guys over a bar brawl that it looses the point. Not only that he’s TRYING to paint the punisher as better but...

Garth also has FRANK do something out of character. And given Garth is good at writing him this sticks out. Frank killing a guy this way if he did something extra henious or Frank needed info I could buy. He has almost no limits when it comes to his work. The only solid one is “No killing innocents”. But doing it “just for variety” isn’t him. Frank has issues sure, and is a serial killer, clearly. But his methodlogy is doing this for a warped sense of justice and vengance, and doing it as efficently, quickly and brutally as possible. He’s not going to get bored, tired, or anything, he’s going to keep going until he dies. Nothing will slow him down and even if you took his legs and arms and left him blind and deaf, he’d find SOME way to still keep going the second he was able. Frank Castle is many things and most of them are bad.. but he is DRIVEN in the most horrifying way possible and thus woudln’t waste time doing this.

So we naturally get to the fight.. and Wolverine is pitted as the bad guy.. despite the fact Frank is not only worse, but Logan has EVERY REASON to think Frank did this. He as far as I know dosen’t know frank well and to him he’s juts a serial killer no one’s been able to put down.

Now to Garth’s credit the fight does go as it should.. Frank gets his ass handed to him. He blows wolverine’s face off, sure

But Logan DOES have the upperhand the whole fight. The issue besides writing wolverine like he did all the cocaine in the NYC arc, is that Ennis treats Logan like some idiot who gets by purely on his powers and unbreakable claws. And that again.. is not the character. Part of why Logan’s deadly is that the unbreakable skeleton, the healing factor.. those are nice and defintley useful.. .but his main asset is he REALLY is the best at what he does. He’s been trained in ninjutsu, black ops, and all sorts of nasty stuff, and thus can kill like no one else. When up against an alien empire while fighting off one trying to make him into one of them, he still fought his way to the other x-men and freed them, single handed. If it was just raw power the brood would’ve killed his ass.. its his skill at what he does that makes him truly the best at what he does. Sure he loves a good scrap and diving into one.. but he can kick ass in 80 diffrent ways and taught Kitty Pryde how to do so, skills that have been invaulable since, and Jubilee got he same lessons. Logan is as skilled if not more than frank and were he not written like his brain was in beast’s lab for study that week and he was somehow still up and about despite that, Frank would be dead.

I will say though that as infamous as this next moment is.. it is clever and does feel warranted. Since his junk apparently isn’t adamantium, I don’t know the mechanics of that honetstly maybe they just didn’t have enough for his dong but given it’s b een implied he’s had sex with MANY women since getting his skeltington, it clearly isn’t so he did his research on one thing at least?, Frank targets it

As pety as this is.. I can’t help but laugh. it’s just fucking gloriously ludcrious yet unlike some things that are about to happen, fully in line with both characters and this universe. Before Frank can set him on fire, as you do, their interupted as the mysterious power behind these chainsawings announces itself over the pa and invites both to join.. .and says the mob will see the real power in this city “just as soon as we cut them down to size” and wellllll

And the answers are somehow evne more insane than an army of gangster dwarfs surronding a faceless wolverine and the punisher.

So after the two end up overwhelmed as Frank lacks a gun and Wolverine is coming down, we meet the boss , Tony Casnio, dwarf brother of the guy who frank killed and whose HAPPY his brother died. Besides the obvious power vacum Tony .. didn’t have the happiest last 35 years. See at fist Tony and his brother TOmmy were happy, loyal to each other.. but with Tony having dwarfisim, he was constantly tormented by his brother to make Tommy look better as time went on, with Tony slowly seething and plotting revenge. And once Frank left a power vacum because you know, he just kills people he dosen’t actually think of how to take them down and make them stay down, with his solution as we’ve seen being just kill the pieces, Tommy stepped in.. and see this would be fine. A dwarf mob boss is neat and him making his own mafia out of the disinfranchised from the various famillies and other bits of crime would be neat.. but then. .he outlines the rest of his plan...

Okay.. so Garth. You mock superheroes, you hate the concept and have not been shy about it tha’ts fine.. but don’t tell me THIS is any less insane. Don’t tell me using people with dwarfisim as a fucking stupid punchline and having them create a slave race by cutting peoples legs off is any LESS rediculolus than any superhero comic. I have seen things like a chruch try to use nightcrawler as pope, scrooge mcduck buy a whole island ot teach his nephew a lesson and hammer head cause a NUCLEAR EXPLOSION in aunt may’s inhereted breeder reactior that blows up an entire canadian island.. and this is still easily one of the dumbest things i’ve seen. Not only is reducting a disablity to basically a punchline after trying to treat it with some respect incredibly dumb, the issue is called “aim low” for fucks sake, but the fact Gartht hought he had any amoutn of high ground after this arc in mocking superhero comics, to the point his final arc is mocking superheroes, is just..the funneist thing i’ve ever heard

SO naturally Frank says NOPE to that and to Ennis credit, and as we’ve seen he has about as good a credit as Peter Parker, it’s why he has to web up bill collectors after all, he DOES give Frank good reasons to oppose them: to him killing these guys is just something that has to be done. Dosen’t make him right, god no, but it’s done out of duty. Tony.. is butchering people for revenge instead of simply rising above it. So frank pisses off wolverine into acting, which gets them away from them because he.. forgot he could overpower a bunch of normal people? ANd then when wolverine is clearly willing ot team up frank’s response is..

Yeah as I said the first nut shot, while clearly in part ennis trying to humiate a character he dosen’t like.. is actually funny and clever. It’s frank simply finding a bat and using it, and an funny yet still awesome way to distpatch someone FAR above frank’s weight class. This one though? This is just ennis being petty and Frank being stupid. Ennis coudln’t stop at ONE nut shot, he had to go for two and make the second one even worse, while Frank.. throws away a useful ally for no reason. I get in this story WOlvie is basically a giant mallet but like.. your outgunned and outmanned frank, it pays to take what help you can get and save the nut shot for if he gets out of hand.

So they try to cut WOlverine’s legs off with a chainsaw because this story has tgone so far off the rails it’s plowed into xavier’s school for gifted youngsters, but Frank frees wolvine, who gives Tommy some revenge by slicing his limbs off while his slave shoots himself. Frank mows everyone else down because punisher wins, and then rolls Logan over with a steamroller because Garth CLEARLY just had to get in one last petty shot. I mean i’d write it off as another quick gag if it wasn’t for the fact they spend TWO pages on this. So we end on frank killing all the amputees. YAY, one killer .. wins I guess

Final Thoughts; As you can tell this story is fucked.. but in the best way: from the edgelord humor to how cartoonishly over the top it is to how TRANSPARENT Ennis hate of logan is, this story while not good and certainly offensive, is fun to point and laugh at. I certainly did. If like me you coudl use a laugh.. this story isn’t bad. it was clealry itnended to be a comedy and it is.. just not how garth intended. The attmept at character assaination is so bad it just winds up being memorably funny instead. Maybe sometime i’ll review wolverine’s other apperance but until then follow for more, and thanks for reading.

#wolverine #the punisher #x-men #marvel comics #garth ennis #marvel knights #dwarfisim #the mob #logan howlett

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androgynousblackbox · 3 years

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Sorry i just needed to vent but creepshows video about a trans csa survivor artist who drew porn of an underage FICTIONAL character was so fucking offensive like the video itself dismisses the abuse that the artist went through despite her saying she uses it to cope and the fact that the comments were full of idiotic antis saying "lmao the lgbt community dosent claim this pedo" and albeists making fun of her mental illness and her LIKING the comments makes me so fucking angry man!

Crapshow is a garbage person so of course she is going to have a garbage audience. It wasn’t not even just that, but the wave of pure hatred that Aggy recieved because of that video was so big that you couldn’t blink a second on her profile without finding people tagging the FBI, putting in doubt her abuse, putting in doubt her gender identity, putting into doubt. When I tell you all those comments were VILE I am not exaggerating. Of course there was also a lot of support too, not only from pro shippers but people who knew the law, people who saw that art was OBVIOUSLY cathartic of something fucked up and others who genuelly enjoyed her art style. She went from a pretty fucking humble artist with less than 1000 followers to 2000 and more, which is still humble but a lot bigger than what she had before Crapshow ever looked on her direction. Her influence would have been minimal if not for that video. But the harassment continued, people tried to take down the comics Aggy was selling in other sites, they succeeded in taking her Etsy shop and finally she had enough so last I knew about her, she had abandoned social media. Before that she has aldo tweeted about recently losing her job because of Covid. Who knows where the fuck she is now or what she is doing in order to have food on her plate. So all those fuckers, instigated by Crapshow herself, who had no qualms to call her a predator with no evidence of any real victim, the worst artist on twitter despite being the same platform where fucking SHADMAN is in, went to a completely unkown trans woman artist obviously working through some traumatic experiences on her art clearly tagged, clearly marked for an adult audience (which didn’t stopped Crapshow to share it to her underage audience, of course, even though herself had made sensual drawings on the past on the background of her videos and there was NEVER any warning) and took away one of her sources of income just after she had already lost her job, putting every single part of who she was to be scrutinized by people whose thirst for moral superiority made it all the more cruel. I think I heard too that she has been doxxed so, hey, maybe that means that the cops were called on her and god know what could have happened. Maybe she doen’t even have a house anymore, who knows! I don’t! I fucking despise Crapshow. I hate the people who did that, but she can go to hell for all I care. She saw this artist that she KNEW hasn’t done anything to anyone. This artist who NO ONE would have know about if it wasn’t because of her. This artist that wouldn’t have any kind of support when things went wrong. This artist whose only crime was to use HER art to cope with trauma and Crapshow blasted her with all her influence, all her support and never even blinked. Countless people tried to reason with her, mind you. People far more compassionate and understanding me than me tried to reach out to tell her about none of that bullshit was at all necesary, and all she had to say about it “uwuw i am tired to argue about why pedophilia is bad uwuwuwuw”. What a fucking piece of shit. That is not even the single one thing she did. She also made public donation request on her twitter asking people to post their paypal so she could send them money, making a bunch of her UNDERAGE fans to post paypals that positively revealed their personal information. She has been so flippant and so fucking irresponsible on the way that she handled the Vanity’s situation that one of her fans ended up trying to catch a REAL LIFE PREDATOR, which could have ended terribly bad for them, because they tried to be cool and hip like Crapshow when treating those issues. And you better believe t that she is a verygood reason why there were later minors on twitter publishing CSEM on twitter as it were fanart to “denounce it” and, if not, at least I have no doubt that she didn’t helped AT ALL with the mentality that real life pictures = fanart and therefore they can be treated on exactly the same way interchangeably. If their favourite youtuber was publishing barely censored “cp” on the thumbnail, then they could do the same when they found CP with real children, right? Shitting all over the victims because god knows is not about them. It was never about protecting anyone. It was about them. Them and their fucking clout. I am right there with you, anon. These people were vindictive, cruel and stripped everything away from someone who didn’t had much in the first place. And for what? FOR FUCKING ART. Crapshow ruined someone’s life who hasn’t done anything to anyone and I hope someday comes back to bite her in the ass, I really fucking do. I will not shred a single tear for her.

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soyouareandrewdobson · 3 years

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Dobbear! SYAC: The Master Review 6

I am so going to ruin someone’s childhood with that now, but...

guys, it had to be done!

Dashing and daring…

Courageous and caring!

Faithful and friendly…

With stories to share!

Doesn’t at all apply to this one artist…

Lesbian obsessed and each nerddom’s nightmare!

Dobby BEAR!

Whinning here and there and everywhere!

Making claims that are beyond compare…

This is our Dobby-Bear!

Yeah, if you can’t guess, around now is the time I am going to put down the kids gloves and will really dig into why SYAC is garbage. And a huge factor into this, is in part Dobson’s self insert past 2012.

The existence of the blue bear as Dobson officially calls it (or Dobbear as most people call it) is in my opinion rather baffling already in terms of design choices.

I get e.g. that Dobson wanted to distance himself of his past humanoid self inserts as much as possible. But why of all things a bear?

The fact I am focused on that may sound weird, but hear me out for a bit. For starters, I know that Dobson likes western animation. And seeing how western animation has for the longest time been dominated by anthropomorphic animals, I can understand why he would redesign himself as a funny cartoon animal.

But there are at least three things that feel weird about it. First, Dobson had made it clear in the past that he hates furries. So him actually redesigning himself as an anthropomorphic animal is kinda weird

In fact, Dobson himself acknowledges that realization in one of his strips shortly after his fursona took over.

Second, of all the animals to choose from, why a bear? This question is in so far valid, as that bears are not necessarily one of the first to go animals, furries or western animators tend to go for when designing an anthro. And before any furries or anthro enthusiasts are calling me a hater, let me make one thing clear: I like anthropomorphic cartoon and comic characters too, and am okay with most furries. As long as you don’t have a diaper fetish, are a pedophile or hurt actual animals, you can do and enjoy whatever you like.

But I am also aware enough of furry culture to know, that bear based anthros are most of the time hyper sexualized and muscular, connecting them to how the term “bear” is used in real life gay culture. Which is okay, I think it is just a funny coincidence that Dobson choose an animal, that most furries associate with a life style that Dobson is deeply afraid of, even if he claims to be an LGBT ally.

And as stated earlier, bears are not necessarily the go to animals for animators.

Don’t get me wrong, we all know some cartoon bears like Winnie the Pooh, Yogi Bear, Poh and the main cast of TaleSpin (btw, Kit Cloudkicker fan for life). But lets be honest here; ducks, mice, rabbits, canines, felines, equines and any other “easily to domesticate” animal in the real world tends to make better for easily recognizable cartoon characters than something that can reach a size of 3 meters tops and weigh over 500 pounds.

Truth be told, the pool of cartoon bears is so small, these are the first two things that came to my mind when thinking what may have inspired the Dobbear

And wouldn’t you know? According to Dobson, the Carebears were supposedly the main inspiration for his design.

Unfortunately, this is also more or less the most I could find of Dobson addressing what went into the creation of the character.

Which kinda brings me also to the third issue as why I think the bear redesign is weird; It is too sudden.

One day Dobson draws himself as a shaved 20 something, the next day he is a fedora wearing Carebear clone, likely created and then rejected by Care Bear villain No Heart, as part of a plot to create a mole when conquering Care-A-Lot.

… and now I need to reevaluate my choices in life, that I was able to make such an elaborate Carebear joke.

It is just a change of design that in my opinion should have been addressed either outside of the comic or in context of it. Which it kinda is, but isn’t.

See, this is the first strip with the blue bear

And then only 13 strips or so later in something called “Continuity” is Dobson more or less willing to address the change…

And he does so in a passive aggressive manner, with Persistent Pam as a stand in for those asking him what is going on, while Dobson just dismissively continues working.

On one hand, you can argue that this is just the joke. The change happened, don’t bother with it, just enjoy what is still to come. And you know, I don’t want to make a rope out of everything Dobson ever posted, including that comic.

But then you have also to account for the fact, that Dobson would eventually associate himself with the blue bear so much, he made him his avatar and icon for his comics and online accounts. In fact, that one comic I posted WAY BACK in the first Master post of Dobson reminiscing how he started SYAC?

For reasons that are a bit confusing to me, he redrew himself (badly I have to add) as the blue bear in one of his earliest strips ever. The one where he belittles the manga fangirl for drawing manga. So I have to ask, what is going on here? Has Dobson increasingly decided to reset his past? Does he want to destroy any traces of his “human” self in his work to create the illusion to any new readers, that he never was as controversial of a person as he was and that there never was a need for him to reimagine and reinvent himself? Is this 1984? And how many of you realize that this paragraph is just me going conspiracy nuts for the sake of entertainment?

But still, it is kinda weird that he went to the bother of redrawing his human self in that one background sketch as a bear. Plus, I honestly think Dobson never even attempting to “explain” the change in the pages of his comics is a wasted opportunity for some decent jokes. Like every time Dobson tries to explain why he is a bear now, something interrupts him or we only get fragments of a story that if we put them together would be as ridiculous as the entirety of “Trapped in the Closet”.

I mean, the dumbest joke idea I have in mind is that Dobson went to build a bear to get a present for a family member. Instead he was build into a bear and later on successfully sued the company, which explains why he can afford to live despite not really working on comics anymore but lecture people badly about the evils of nerd culture.

So yeah, three major things about the design choice that more or less confuse me.

But here is the thing: Confusion is nothing compared to feeling genuine disdain for the design at hand. And compared to Dobson’s earlier human designs, Dobbear is just utterly unlikable.

A lot of that boils down to the following three facts:

1. From a certain point in time on (which I will cover in more detail later on) Dobson uses his bearsona primarily as a soapboxing mouth piece to talk about “politics” in nerd culture. Or at least what Dobson perceives as politics, coming off like a condescending jackass who believes among other things that white people are inherently incapable to identify with black people…

… or that comic book shops have radicalized nerd culture, essentially calling them terror cells.

Which btw are so inherently offensive to me, I promise I will cover these two separately. One even sooner than the other.

2. If Dobbear is not talking about politics, he will tend to be a smug asshole to other people (most of the time strawmen) or their interests in one way or another. Being e.g. used by Dobson to express his disdain for criticism…

or to mock legit criticism he had gotten by exaggerating things.

All while also tending to make his critics look like inherent assholes.

These two facts, combined with Dobson’s average erratic behavior online on platforms such as dA, twitter and tumblr over the years, pretty much assured such a close association between the two, that a separation between artist and creation was not possible anymore, condemning them.

And for the record; Dobson was always a bit of a whinner who liked to act as if he was a better nerd than the average comic book fan. Otherwise, we would have not e.g. gotten Danny and Spot out of it.

But as the years went by in the last decade, Dobson turned from someone in his mid 20s, desperate to be seen as a “quirky” and likable internet persona (like certain internet reviewers), into a virtue signaling, lesbian obsessed asshole who likely regrets his life choices.

… Like certain internet reviewers.

But seriously, Dobson turned into someone who would flip the lid at something as ridiculous as Cheeto flavored chicken fries…

While also being just the worst type of condescending nerd….

All while losing his mind about politics. Especially after Donald Trump became president

And just as Dobson became a radicalized left winged jackass who saw politics in everything he consumed, so did by default Dobbear, because Dobbear was not a character with his own personality, but a mouth piece.

Something I am about to get into detail in the near future. But till then, I want to cover in the next post the following third and final fact about Dobbear that really makes him unlikable to me: The fact he can’t be happy.

#syac #Andrew Dobson #dobbear #tom preston #so...you are a cartoonist #review #master review #webcomic #comics

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communistkenobi-archive · 3 years

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I've always wanted to read star wars books/comics but never knew where to start or what to stay away from, any recs?

for comics I would recommend the 2016 comic called Anakin & Obi-Wan (or maybe Obi-Wan & Anakin? it’s one or the other). it’s probably my favourite piece of non-show/movie SW material and I can’t recommend it enough! All the others I’ve read so far are fairly unmemorable and/or bad, but I also haven’t read a ton of them in general.

for books, it depends on what you want to read. the Ahsoka novel is probably the best one I’ve read so far - it takes place almost directly after the tCW finale. A New Dawn is good if you like Kanan & Hera content. Kenobi is also good, it’s about Obi-Wan being a sad little man in the desert. There’s also Rogue Planet, which has a weird plot but excellent early-years Anakin and Obi-Wan content. Master & Apprentice also has a goofy ass plot but Qui-Gon and Obi-Wan are pretty good in it.

and this isn’t a novel, but Jedi Path is an in-universe training manual for Padawans that has a ton of really neat lore and Jedi culture/worldbuilding. There’s a Sith version of it that I’ve only read a couple pages from, but it’s similarly got some really neat lore in it.

in terms of books to stay away from - Wild Space seems to be a fan favourite but it’s offensively terrible in my opinion, I can’t overstate how awful it is. Pirate it if you want to read it but absolutely do not pay any money for it. There are a few brief moments in it that are sweet (mostly Obi-Wan being concerned about Anakin), but Bail is horribly mischaracterised, the pacing is garbage, it’s repetitive and the climax is a huge flop. It’s the only book I’ve read so far that’s been like actually objectively bad, everything else has been decent to good.

#sw.txt #questions in spaaace #book recs

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unichrome · 3 years

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I think one of the reasons American media is so incredibly annoying and obnoxious most of the time is because it constantly has to take a political stance and convey messages. No matter what it is about - be it comedy or horror, comics or TV shows.

And often be horribly bad at it and only doing it for woke points - the currency of which the Americans use to judge if it was good or bad. Don't get me wrong, it's great to have a plot that isn't offensive, but that shouldn't be the only plot point.

Every piece of American media is carefully designed to cater to a specific American, mostly men of course but occasionally other groups as well. Which makes men really angry as they too are so used to the specific catering for them that anything else is deemed bad. Then they too notice that whatever media up for discussion was only made for woke points, as if they didn't crave that themselves.

Anyway, what I wanted to say is that I'm too tired of being constantly fed morality cookies from any and all American media. I just want to enjoy the story. And I don't want to see the Americans debate if a movie was good or not based on that carefully crafted 20 second segment meant to portray the state of racism in schools or that one line a side character said about the economy. I do understand why they do it though, because most likely it didn't have much else of interest.

It's really really tiresome. Just about every piece of garbage the American entertainment industry sends our way is propaganda. I just want to enjoy a good story.

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bugaboowritings · 4 years

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Date My Best Friend, You Dumb Cat - Superhero Accidental Reveal Fic

Alya Found Out Adrien's Secret and is MAd that He Isn't Doing His Homework

So... I had this piece in my head since I saw that old Instagram post about Alya and Adrien being partners for a school project and that comic about Adrien and Alya having an accidental Reveal when their glamour dropped.

May make this a series.. Also have this same thing but with Chloe - Check them out! ( 1 ) and ( 2 )

And then with Marinette/Ladybug and Adrien - ( 1 )

Two months, one week, three days, and seven hours since the new semester started.

Two months, one week, and twelve hours since Miss Bustier assigned the first group project.

Two months, one week, eleven hours, and forty minutes since Alya Césaire and Adrien Agreste were randomly selected to be partners.

Four minutes after that, Alya teased her best friend mercilessly if she wanted to trade partners.

Two years, six months, two weeks and twenty-three hours since Ladybug and Chat Noir first appeared in Paris.

Two years, six months, and three weeks since Alya met her best friend, Marinette Dupain-Cheng on the first day of school in a new town.

Two seconds since she discovered Chat Noir’s identity.

Two years, six months, and two weeks since Marinette confessed to Alya about her crush on a certain blond she thought Marinette strongly disliked.

Seven seconds since she found out about Chat’s secret identity.

Two years and five months since Alya decided to investigate the real-life superheroes patrolling the city.

Eleven seconds since the mask and the magical spandex fully disintegrated off her skin.

What happened only moments ago played as if someone clicked freeze-frame on this point of Alya Césaire’s life as her miraculous glamour dropped.

Leaving Alya Césaire in the cold alley as Rena Rouge vanished into thin air. Ending the superhero illusion when her suit reached its five-minute limit.

The dazzled Lady-blogger watched the little coy Fox God of Illusion twist their expression in amusement. The corners of their mouth turned up in a sharp smile, playfully flicking their tongue at their user.

“Oh, this is going to be fun explaining to the Leader Lady.”

“You’re-! ADrienN!” Alya choked.

“How- OH MY GOD! You’re- Oh my god!!” She stuttered, barely grasping what was going on as she tripped over her words while the fatal conclusion hit her gut. Her stomach felt hot and twirled in knots. Her cold, clammy hands traveled to her curls, locking her fingers in her hair as she pulled strands away from her face. Not believing what she just witnessed.

Alya swore on this day that she went brain dead before her eyes widened and readjusted to the dark atmosphere. Without her mask, Alya was left without her magical night vision, forced to focus on the scene organically while her glasses slowly dipped off the bridge of her nose.

The gears clicked and ground in Alya Césaire’s observant mind, jumping faster to conclusions than a gun could fire a bullet into a clear sunny day. Pinning ideas and theories then shuffling around clues that could make this sound believable to herself. Even as she sat there, sitting in the middle of the alley-way trash bin, watching the aftermath of the Miraculous unfold.

GOD!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Of course, she JUST HAD to make the grave mistake on dropping into the same alley that Chat Noir did.

AND OF COURSE!!-, she did it without thinking it through! Not while the adrenaline levels spiked up in the blood in her veins, giving her this deadly sense of invincibility. The same feeling that made her fearless when she leaped over buildings and dropped from heights that could kill her and her courage.

However, in the heat of the moment, there’s no time left to worry when her necklace gave an urgent beep. Alya remembered thinking that she had more time to spare, yet the second she blinked -her orange suit was already peeling off her body. Causing her to lose her footing in mid-air which led to one of the most ungracefully landings she has ever made. Drawing blood as she scraped her hands hitting the brick wall and almost breaking her neck if she hadn’t landed in the stuffed dumpster or pushed her feet under her weight to cushion her fall. Her sweatshirt returned back on her body and her hair was no longer crimson red, but tree bark brown with fading colored tips.

Then with a loud THUMP, BOOM, and CRASH, a commotion that surely woke up the surrounding neighborhood and scared off any stray cats in the area, the two heroes fell out of the sky and landed into their civilian selves.

Of course, Alya didn’t realize she wasn’t the only one that crash-landed in the alley until it was a second too late to do anything about it.

Untangling herself from the garbage-bins tagged with graffiti and unsettling stains, Alya puffed and huffed, holding her breath to trap the last bit of fresh air she had stored in her lungs. Only to gasp for air, not because of the grime and disgusting odors around her but she noticed the glow and gleam of green and black across from her.

Alya swore that she covered her eyes, for her sake and his- but she recognized that voice as it groaned. Along with those familiar orange shoes that kicked up and around, same with the sweats with a familiar logo stitched on the side.

The Gabriel Brand.

Gabriel Agreste.

THE Gabriel Agreste.

One of the top lines in fashion.

Practical clothing but at expensive prices.

A-And that! What he was wearing was part of a new street-wear! One only rumored to exist and if so- it wasn’t hitting the stores for a figure of a few months!! (Thank you, Marinette for your vast knowledge of fashion and launches and your endless rambles about them.)

Yet, how could-!? How could this sly cat have access to the brand or rumored collection!? How could this leather-wearing flirt have the cash to have anything with the Agreste brand on it?

Was he some sort of business partner? A loyal customer with benefits? Heir to a company that has ties with the Agreste? New money or old?!

No- that can’t be right. Gabriel wouldn’t just hand off his secret collection unless…Unless it was someone worth giving to.

It wasn’t until the infamous cat raised his head up in a moan that Alya Césaire, local Lady-blogger, saw his face, Chat Noir’s face, without the mask.

As ungracious this whole situation was, this seemed like the only right way to figure out the kitty’s identity.

All thanks to a series of unfortunate events and some bad luck.

Something totally on-brand for him.

The blond brushed his hair with the tips of his fingers before lightly rubbing the sore spot over his neck. Rocking his head back and forth and around to alleviate the stinging. His forehead wrinkled as he groaned once more, knitting his eyebrows together. All before opening his acid green eyes wide at the reporter when she released the breath she held in.

Adrien Agreste being this cocky superhero that swirled and twirled about the city- the same one that wore a bell and slick black leather- explained so little and left so many questions unanswered.

It did, however, explain the little details that she looked over when it came to Adrien Agreste. How he jumped into action when he heard the Akuma Alert, how he didn’t run for his life but quickly claim that he needed to go to the bathroom when a giant semi-monster or Akuma loomed over the city, how he seemed to be a true Ladybug Stan since the beginning it all- even when Paris was barely getting used with their new super-reality, how he checked with Alya after almost every blog post if she uploaded something during school hours, the quick comments and awkward praise given about his alter-ego when the Miraculous Duo came to be the topic again in the lunch table.

The Lady-blogger knew that Chat Noir playing offense when Darkblade came to claim Paris could be a clue, how Chat Noir knew where to take the students when evacuating the school after a nasty Akuma attack when he ‘supposedly’ never been there, and then how Chat Noir called everyone by their name when it was the first time her classmates even had the chance to see him in person and not on a news-recap.

Why Adrien had to miss the grand installment of the Miraculous Duo Statue in the park, but he never really missed it because he was THERE! Chat Noir was in her classroom and she didn’t even-!!

Alya gasped.

“Our project is due before 12!” Cupping her mouth before throwing her hands out to the blond. Yanking him out of the trash by the collar of his jacket.

“Why are you here and not finishing the first draft?!”

Adrien Agreste, still pressed up against the alley wall with his back supported by day-old trash, digested Alya’s words before rolling his eyes. A snarky reply slipped his mouth as he shifted his body into a more comfortable spot after getting squashed in the tight alleyway.

“An evil super villain possessed a child, Alya. I have priorities.”

“And our grade isn’t!”

Adrien tucked his legs under himself as a cat kwami popped out of his light blue jacket. Struggling to get on his feet from the buzz sensation in his legs after his fall, resting his hands on the dirty concrete before showing more of his superhero persona.

“Again priorities, Alya!” He uttered, ruffling his hair as he took their current situation in.

Stretching his arms as he stood up to his full height. His hair, messy and tangled, suede one side to the other as Adrien shook his head.

“I can’t leave my Lady alone when a crazed toddler is on the loose.”

----

Who would have guessed?

That the Cat with the dangerously charming grin was the same boy that can’t go out with his friends if work intervened or when his dad flatly said no to his face through a tablet held by his black-suited assistants. The guy that would merciless flirt with the red heroine (he still drinks respect women juice tho) was outside of the world of superheroes and villains, a guy that never went out on a proper date with anyone before.

God, this would surely make a great article.

Alya Césaire had uncovered one of the biggest secrets in Paris, all in a matter of some lucky seconds. Not because of her totally-awesome journalist skills, but all because of dumb luck.

Wait-.

She just lost her secret identity too.

--Ladybug is going to kill her.

Alya got sick and pale when she thought this situation over, not with her Lady Blogger brain, but with her superhero ego. Forgetting how her project was late or the fact if she didn’t return home quickly her family would worry if they didn’t find her in bed at this hour.

Ladybug is going to kill them.

No-... she gonna take away their miraculous FIRST so they then don’t have a chance to fight back and THEN kill them. Most likely after her speech about breaking the most important rule of being a superhero.

“Keeping your secret identity a secret.”

Alya groaned into her hands as the memory of Ladybug’s lectures and advanced fighting skills played in her head.

She is so dead.

Letting that fact sink in before taking in a big deep breath.

“It’s fine,” she can work with this. She can bounce back. She can just explain this to Ladybug without losing her chance at being a Miraculous Holder. It’s gonna be fine-

Parting her hands from her face to see Ch-Adrien pull out a little container of cheese for the black kwami nagging and floating by the blond’s head. The tiny god grinned as it nibbled (inhaled) on that snack as it hovered over his Chosen’s shoulder.

Alya screamed in her palms once more, making her peace on earth.

---

Alya thanked Adrien for the slice of cheese. Handing it to Trixx to get him ready for another transformation. The duo decided that it was better to wait it out for their Kwamis rather than try to walk home in the middle of nowhere in the dead of night.

Once Alya came over the shock of finding out Chat Noir’s identity, she bit her tongue before asking any questions. Taking in what was behind the mask, a good observation was key for a reporter since that can tell more than questions itself could.

His hair was different, it wasn’t the right length (when thinking of his magical alter-ego). Nor did it curl by his ears, but it still had that ‘swish’ and ‘fluff’ texture. His eyes were still that acid green color but seemed more on the light shade and looked more ‘natural’ and ‘safe’ compared to the huge, glowing cat eyes he had before. The same eyes that scared criminals in pit black or lit up a night sky. His face’s silhouette matched the pictures of the hero’s. His jaw was the perfect shape and his height was exactly the same, give or take the added milometers from his boots. Yet, it seemed so weird to see this.

There, Chat Noir peeled away left Adrien Agreste. Laying against the tagged-up walls and using the crunchy trash bags to break his fall and now as bean-bag chairs as he laughed at something his Kwami whispered.

“You’re Chat Noir.”

It was the first sentence she said without coughing or yelping. Scaring Adrien to just hear Alya speak in her stern tone, ruining the silence he thought they (unspokenly) agreed to keep. Nevertheless, Adrien should have known that the quiet could only last for a while before Alya recovered and spit questions with a blink of an eye.

It was too good to be true if he thought they could just forget about this and walk away.

The golden boy bit his bottom lip in what seems to be a mixture of shame, embarrassment, and a dash of amusement. Giving Alya a shy smile before shrugging his shoulders.

“Guess the cat is out of the bag,” Adrien, no, Chat Noir grinned.

The Lady-blogger had to stop the burning need to deck him so hard.

A thin, yet toothy smile appeared before losing it when Cha- Adrien’s kwami, a tiny grumpy cat-god with two white-ivory fangs that stood out in contrast with his deep purple fur, asked for more cheese before showing the rest of his sharp teeth in an attempt for a wide innocent smile.

It was terrifying.

“GOD!” Alya cried, rolling her eyes as her fox kwami fled to talk to Chat Noir, wait no, Adrien’s kwami. Still not over that her classmate was part of the Miraculous Duo. The reporter gasped for air even harder as she reached another conclusion.

“I knew it was you! AH! Ha! I knew it in the beginning!” Alya uttered, switching from frustrating sounds to a laugh that made Adrien question the report’s ability to handle and process all this before Alya pumped her fist up before cursing the universe out loud. Her painted nails rubbed circles on her temples while she munched on this memory in her own flashback.

“I-urgh! I knew! I knew you looked too much like Chat Noir, too much to call it ‘chance’. But no!- Marinette brushed me off. Telling me ‘That’s too good to be true!’- and now!” Tossing her hands out to the blond and his kwami.

The undeniable evidence that landed on her plate.

“Here you are! Both Chat Noir and Adri-“

A cold hand cupped on Alya’s mouth. Stopping her from shouting even louder or even finishing her sentence. Pushing her back to the old brick wall.

The Lady-blogger instinctively fought back, her hands reaching for the fingers over her mouth, but she stopped herself before she scratched the blond or bit his hand (or worse, spit in it).

“Alya,” Adrien hushed. “I know that you know this- but you can’t tell anyone about this. Living or dead- Not a soul, not in any journal entry, not on your blog or to Nino, ever. Not even to Marinette.”

Alya nodded at the sudden serious tone.

“Bad enough that Hawk Moth is still out there with his eye out for our heads. If you or I get akumatized it’s gonna be game over for Ladybug and Paris. You understand that, right?”

Alya shoved his hand away.

“First off, your hand smells like Camembert. Gross.”

“Second,” she sighed. Letting her fingers press against the creases of her forehead before sliding down to her cheek.

“. . .Does Ladybug know?”

Adrien’s fingers tugged on his hoodie string as he nibbled on his lips. His nose crinkled in dissatisfaction.

“We planned to reveal ourselves when Hawk Moth’s gone and defeated . . . “

“How noble.” Alya snorted.

Before Alya could ask anything else, Adrien beat her to the punch. His voice filled the air as cars in the background beeped at each other at the late ride home or to work.

“My turn with this interrogation.” Moving his face a little closer, Adrien Unaware-of-Boundaries-Because-He-Was-Locked-In-A-House-His-Whole-Life Agreste frowned.

“What do you mean by ‘I knew it” and how does Marinette think- wait, does she know that you’re Rena? Alya did you-”

Alya pushed Adrien a step off before rolling her eyes.

“Of course not!” She scoffed.

“I tell Mari everything, but - But Ladybug trusted me with the miraculous and I kept my secret and promise to her.” Twisting her leg in anxiousness before quickly commenting, “ Well it was a secret before THIS happened.”

----

~Study Session at the Library. Be here by 2

~Same table as always

Adrien clicked on the message, typing out a quick response and a time change. Sweeping his hair back, happy with what he wrote after rewriting twice and finally pressing send.

-2:15, but I’m still in the locker room. I’m there by 2:30, tops.

Alya hummed as she saw the little dots on Nino’s phone before disappearing again and then reappearing with a new message. Huffing through her nose before typing a response back.

~It’s due this week and we are out by 3:45.

Adrien pulled his clothes from his locker before hearing the soft buzz of his phone in his gym bag. Groaning in defeat before typing out a dull reply.

-K.

---

Peeling another sticky note to add to the right corner of the book, not before uncapping her thin felt-tipped marker as Marinette scribbled a slanted question. Looping her y’s and not paying attention to the clicks towards the table since it could just be Rose asking for another pen from Alya. However, a chair scraped across the wooden floor and a gym bag thumped on the ground which sent vibrations up the table. Making her jump, pulling back her hand before she accidentally drew a huge line down the page of her textbook.

“Thanks for organizing this session, Alya. I’m glad that we managed to meet up even with my schedule.”

Marinette continued to scribble in her sticky notes. Her handwriting got sloppier as she wrote faster. Her anxiousness escaped from her in her blush and in her quick penmanship. Exhaling sharply, catching Nino’s attention only to lose it as his dirt-colored eyes noticed his best friend. Tugging his headphones off his ears.

“Dude, nice to see you finally make it to one of our ‘nerd meetings’.”

“Hard with my Father and all my tutors back home. Are you gonna finally let me play Mega Strike on your phone or wait until your phone is at 5 percent like last time?”

“Adrien, it was one time!”

“SHH!” the librarian hushed. Quieting the boys and they slowly mellowed in their chairs. The librarian broke his stare and returned back to the paperwork on his desk. The boys broke their silence and the tension in the table as they couldn’t help the chuckles that came up their lips when they looked at each other. Bring back that light environment when the boys nudged each other playfully. Chuckling under their breath as Adrien set his pens and books out from his school bag.

Marinette tried her best to keep her eyes on her paper. She can’t be blushing and rambling like she always did. But God, this was gonna be so hard to do since old habits die hard. As hard as she gripped her pen while she carved the words on her notebook page. The music in her earbuds crashed with her emotions. The lofi beats weren’t calming her; it just made her feel like she was on the wrong station. Debating to switch her playlist to something quicker and louder to make her concentrate on her work and not on something more captivating. . .

WAIT,,, NO!!!! BAD MARINETTE! Don’t think that- he is just a friend!!

Pushing her earbuds in her ear deeper in hopes to drown out his laughter. Her finger swiped across stations and then deciding on to Jagged Stone’s new single. Killing the urge to stare at the model or steal looks at him, but surely looking at him couldn’t hurt-

GOD! WHY DOES SHE HAVE TO BE LIKE THIS!?

They’re just friends. And “just friends” doesn’t mean that you should stare at each other’s eyes. “Just Friends” means just friends especially when one of the friends looks like a certain blond and is potentially dating someone else-

A pink pen rolled over her notebook.

Is that- a Ladybug pen?

Marinette tugged on the wires of her earbuds, letting them fall off her ears and pausing the first verse of Jagged’s song.

“Ah-could you guys pass me my supplies?”

Marinette’s blue eyes finally did the thing she prayed she wouldn’t do.

She looked up.

There, Adrien rushed to pick up his pens, pencils, markers, and highlighters as they rolled off the table. Nino was already crouching down, grabbing the ones that fell under his chair’s legs while Alya picked up the ones that came her way.

“I didn’t know they sold ladybug stationery?” The lady-blogger grinned, twirling the pen between her painted nails. Wiggling her eyebrows at the flustered blond who try to brush off her looks with an eye roll. Hoping that if he ignores the blush that came up his face, they won’t comment on it.

“It was in a pack, Alya.” Adrien bit his lip, reaching over to snatching the pen back from Alya. Only to miss her hand completely as she pulled back her arm in the last second. Teasing Adrien with the pen, holding it out of his grasp. Tossing it to Nino when his fingers reached a little too close to the pen. The boys rough-house a minute before earning themselves another scorning from the librarian.

Over the last two years of going to public school compared to the first day he tried to sneak through the front gates, Adrien Agreste would have died on the spot if he got scorned by an authority figure other than his caregiver, well ‘care’-givers, at Françoise Dupont High School - but with time, Adrien Agreste mellowed into the new role of Adrien, the student.

Just the student.

A different persona from the one that lived at home and bloom when entering school grounds. Adrien would say that he’s more care-free and open than before as he learned how to sneak out and what buttons to press when joking with his closest friends. Like how Nino always fell for the “What’s that?” trick- no matter what or how Kagami liked puns even if she frowned or how Marinette would shot a sarcastic remark if given the chance (so Adrien tried his best to set the joke to hear Mari’s slick comments which often ending with an innocent smile before walking away).

So it wasn’t unusual for Adrien to act like this, like a teenager and not some super famous model. Just a student who was currently blushing in embarrassment due to his Ladybug stationary.

“They’re nice.”

The study group turned to the peep in the corner. Marinette swiped her thumb over the magical ladybug clip on the pen.

It felt heavy and good in her hand, it had nice weigh to it. All with a slick design that didn’t seem cheesy or cheap. It’s hard to make polka-dots work nicely, but who would know right?

“I’m more of Chat Noir fan though.” A small smile slipped out as she spun the pen in her hand one last time. Her face softens as she thought about her partner and how cute it would be to have his cartoon face on sticky notes if it didn’t add to his ego. Marinette finally passed the pen to Adrien who unconsciously held out his hand when her hand went out to him.

“Cool,” Adrien answered. Not knowing what to say without giving himself away or boasting about the Miraculous Duo without sounding stiff or awkward.

That little moment was gone as a voice cleared the air.

“So you’re a cat stan now?”

-------

“I didn’t know you dig that type of leather, Mari?” Alya purred as she grinned a little too hard as her joke, causing her cheeks to squish the edge of her amber-colored iris. Narrowing her four eyes at her clueless friend.

“I’m not- why are you making it sound so weird?!”

“I’m not!”

“Yes. Yes, you are.” Marinette rolled her eyes before shaking her head. Quickly stepping down the stairs with the reporter on her heels. Blowing her bangs out of her eyes, reminding herself to trim them when she gets home or when she’s free by this weekend.

“And-stop looking at me like that, Alya!”

“I wasn-”

“I can feel your laser vision from here.”

“Okay, fine! I give, Mari. I can’t lie to you no more.” Throwing her arms around the designer’s neck and tugging her near. Marinette pulled her legs under her before she choked herself with Alya’s hold.

“The truth is- I’m setting you up with a superhero, but can’t unless I absolutely know that you’re into them.”

“. . . .what?”

-------

#alya cesaire #adrien agreste #rena rouge #chat noir #miraculous ladybug #ml Fic #my writings #My writing #my Fic #reveal #marinette dupain cheng #fluff #miraculous the tales of ladybug and chat noir #ml fics #superhero Reveal

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atrixfromice · 4 years

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What are some French swear words?

Ooh I remember when I signed up on tumbrl and I was really excited with the idea people were able to ask me questions here, heheh And now I have my questions piled up, oh my! I feel shame of myself! *blushes and hides her face under her hands * So that's why I'm trying to catch up with the questions people have given me.

This one made me laugh a lot and blush a lot at the same time! HEHEHEH! Mostly because when you said “swear words" I imagined me saying such words and being red like a tomato while doing it! XD

It will be ok if I ask you a question before replying your question?...because I’m very curious!

Why would you want to know swear words in French in the first place?

In general it’s something people asks me very otfen when I tell them I know french, it’s pretty hilarious and intriguing.

Specially, your question it’s so funny, because when I starting learning french I thought I absolutely didn’t wanted to learn french swear words and I was avoiding them like the plague! I avoided the sites I thought might contain them so I couldn’t find them. Bu I never thought youtube could have them. I watched videos of my favorite cartoons in french on youtube to practice my hearing, and the videos didn’t had them, so I thought I was safe....but the comments people made had swear words in them sometimes, cos teen french used them for everything! O_O like if they were common words like “ok” or “hey”.

Then I tried to leave youtube and other sites, and stay just on deviantart and comment some french artists pieces to practice my writting, but many teenager native french on deviantart talked like that was well. They literally cound’t start a phrase without a swear word on it! XD

So at the end I ended up accepting that was part of french culture, wether I liked or and I coudn’t escape of that heheh

And I chilled up a bit. Mostly because I realized the French tend to be pretty open about them. They don’t see them as shocking words or to offend someone, they use them more like a wildcard for their phrases, specially young ones.

That said, I still don’t like swear words and I’m still not in favor of teaching people this kind of stuff because I think it’s not really useful. But I encourage the curiosity of learning another language, and I like people being inquisitive, so lets see what I can do.

If you google for “swear words in french” you’ll find a lot. So I think it will be a lot cooler to know stuff you don’t learn in books nor in the web, but in real life talking ( or writting moslty in my case, although I have had the chance to talk too) with other french! Like how you can use swear words in an elegant way, or using euphemisms. So you can use them without anybody gasping and being schocked at it.

I will start with the softest ones and gradually go to some that are stronger. well, as much as being an artists who works on family entertaintment field lets me at least *chuckles*

Sacrebleu!

This one means “ sacred blue” and it comes from the time on 19 century when people referred to Mary’s bue dress, and used it as an exclamation expression. And people considered it a swear word because they believed saying that was taking her name in vain. This one probably you have heard it already a lot of times on french themed movies or shows. And it really isn’t a swear word on nowadays. It could be an equivalent of “darn” in english.

It’s an outdated one though. No french says it since a pretty good time. But I think it’s a very cool and funny one, it sounds cool! So I couldn’t help including it here hehe

I think it would be great if people in nowadays would want to say it!

Nom d’un chien!

It comes from "Nom de dieu” which in the 19 century was considered a swear word, because people had the belief to mention God’s name on an exclamation phrase was a bad thing because they were “taking God’s name in vain”. Also, some people use “chien” to refer to the word in french for S***.

Still in use, but mostly by elderly people.

Flûte!

This one means literally “flute”, the instrument. But I love it because it’s so hilarious how if well used, it can become an exclamation expression with F word because it resembles very much to the F word in french. And it’s ok to say it on rated G material! As I’ve seen on french comic books and movies. So you can actually use it on your rated G work, and it sounds more like what a genuine french would say than “sacrebleu“.

Still in use by all french, but specially middle aged and mature people.

Diantre

Means “dammit”, and it’s used very often, specially by mature aged people, as an exclamacion expression of surprise or anger. Like: “Damn! I forgot my car’s keys!” “Diantre! J'ai oublié mes clés de voiture!”

Not very used by the younger ones though, but it’s a cool one! I think people should use it more!

Bordel

A mess.This word literally means bordello or brothel, and is used in that sense as well.

“Bordel” is one of my favorite french words despite being considered a swear word, because it’s not much an offensive word like other swear words. Its more like a word most commonly used in exclamation expressions like “Like oh ****! That movie was incredible!!” “Oh bordel! Ce film à ete incroyable!”

Or talking about something being messy or sloppy, like “my table was really a mess after cooking”, "Ma table etait un vrai bordel après avoir cuisiné”.

You can also use this one as an expression of rage to someone, like “****! why did you beat up my brother?! “Bordel!

There are also some other words that are used with the purpose of being offensive. Like for example:

Dégage !

Get out of my way! /**** off! The verb dégager used to suggest movement – especially that of expulsing something – in non-obscene contexts, as well. As a swear word, it actually really depends on the way a person uses it. It would never be polite to say to someone if you want them to get out of your way, but it can range from “Move!” or “Get out of my way!” to “Fuck off!” depending on how angry/frustrated the speaker is.

Dégueulasse (sometimes shortened to “Dégueu”).

Disgusting/repugnant. This can refer to a thing, a person, an action, a situation, etc. It’s used all the time, especially on reality TV and by teens across France, and is only moderately obscene. Still, when in polite company, use its perfectly above-board sibling, dégoûtant(e), instead. I say this from experience.

Ta gueule

Shut the ****/hell up! This expression comes from the phrase “Ferme ta gueule“, that means literally “shut up your snout”, but it’s so frequently used that just the last two words are necessary now.

Like some of the other words on this list, this one’s power seems to vary depending on the context and, especially, the tone of the speaker. It’s often used in French comedies when a person is getting angry or upset – and in those cases, where it doesn’t seem particularly violent or full of loathing, it could be best translated as “Shut the hell up!” or even simply “Shut up!”.

On the other hand, if the person saying it is doing so in an aggressive way, it could probably be better translated as “Shut the fuck up!”

Se taire

Means “Shut up!” Like its English counterpart, this isn’t so much obscene, as impolite. “Tais-toi” is the most common form.

Chier

Means to defecate, but in a vulgar way, so it’s the equivalent of the word S*** in english. Even if this one IS a strong swear word, I added it here because it's use in french it’s very interesting and fascinating to me . It’s a word that isn’t only be used as an insult, but it also can be used to express when something or someone it’s annoying, or just plain boring.

“Faire chier" A wonderful, versatile expression that ultimately shows annoyance. If used reflexively (most commonly Je me fais chier) it means to be fucking bored or annoyed.

Faire chier, is also a common expression that means to “piss off someone” to make someone mad.This comment I found from someone who traveled to paris was very interesting:

“This is an expression I heard a lot last time I went to Paris. Every time a train was cancelled, I could hear lots of “ils font vraiment chier !”

À chier

s***ty/garbage. Le film était à chier. The movie was s***ty.

Chiant(e)

Bloody annoying.

This can be used to describe a living being; Je ne veux pas voir Sandra et son chien – ils sont chiants tous les deux ! I don’t want to see Sandra and her dog – they’re both bloody annoying !

Or a situation

Sa mère lui a dit qu’il doit assister au repas familial au lieu de venir au bar avec nous vendredi soir ? C’est chiant.

His mom told him he has to have dinner with his family instead of going out to the bar with us on Friday night? That’s bloody annoying.

There are a lot of others, but I think those ones are out of my budget *chuckles* Also, they’re a lot! XD So maybe, if you wanna know more about this subjet you can drop me a message :)

I’m not fan of explaining this stuff, but I know if I don’t you will research online and probably will get incorrect info, and then you will be mocked by people because of that, and it will be embarassing. And I don’t wanna be the responsible of that, hehe

In the other hand, I don’t blame you for wanting to know swear words in french, cos it’s true all words sound so beautiful and elegant in french, even the most vulgar and obscene ones XD That’s something I adore from French language and always amazes me!

Don’t believe me? Here’s a proof (and yes those are actual french swear words.)

By the way, I loved the analogy from Matrix of “wiping your ass with silk” XD Very fitting and very hilarious. I for my part would say, hearing swear words in french its like being slapped with a rose petal. You know it’s meant to be a bad thing, yet it’s so nice to hear, it sounds like if they were saying poetry! XD

#atrix replies #asks me anything #French learning #the french side of tumblr #oh my why french is so nice even the swear words #french lovers #french fan #send me asks #ask me anything

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lesslymelissa · 4 years

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New Castlevania season surpassed the worst expectations and turned out to be so horrible, badly written and useless, that it makes you wonder how they even released this shit. First of all, it was a meaningless filler in a length of the whole season. The main plotline which they started since the first season didn’t move an inch. Then again, there was nothing to continue since Dracula has been killed. They could have adapted other Castlevania games about Alucard or Hector instead, but they chose to create a series original plot with Carmilla. And that was terrible decision, because without the game story Netflix writers could suggest only fanfiction tier development, and I mean fanfiction of the worst kind. There are absolutely nonsensical and disgusting pairings out of nowhere, that were made only for the sake of smut. They were tormenting characters, because that’s what many sadistic bitches like. And there was literally zero progression of the actual plot, since the writers obviously can’t make up anything interesting or original themselves. That was an awful pandering to brainless fangirls who only like smut fanfiction and don’t give a shit about personalities of characters or story. It’s very noticeable that the main screen-writer made comics before. He filled this season with typical and retarded cliches that teenagers consider to be ‘cool’, but they are pure cringe in reality. Needless nudity with random filler characters, accentuation on gore and constant dirty (and modern) cursing even from supposed to be nobles. All these things are just edgy banalities which can impress only kids and retarded adults who think that violence and sex make story ‘deep’ and serious. But they don’t. It’s a cheap way to catch attention for the lowest common denominator.

The most prominent example of useless filler shit was Isaac's storyline. Isaac is a token character for sjw to begin with. He is black and muslie (thanks for the reason to dislike this shitty character even more). It was absolutely needless information about his religion which they added only in the adaptation, because it’s trendy among sjw to defend muslies. Obviously there was nothing of sorts in the game and it added nothing to the plot. Like a token black character he was saved from everything first by Dracula himself, and in this season he turned into disgusting mary sue. He is absolutely evil - he literally wanted the destruction of all mankind and is a practicing satanist. How does it combine with him being a muslie and isn’t it offensive in itself I wonder? It seems the authors are braindead. A black muslie satanist, who is also presented as some kind of hero despite killing almost every passerby whom he doesn’t like. Is it a parody or something? But they were totally serious with this shit. Why the fuck does Isaac get away from everything even though he is turning people into hell monsters left and right only because they are ‘rude’ to him. He was acting like a touchy hysterical bitch. This scumbag already deserved to be killed, instead they are implying he could become some sort of a new messiah. What a load of bullshit. He had absolutely meaningless plotline with several long talks about nothing and fighting some random magician in the last moment only to get to a new magic mirror. Isaac is the most cringeworthy and disgusting character that an sjw screenwriter could possibly come up with. All about him is idiotic and pointless. It seems dumb writers went crazy from their Isaac wankfest.

Other characters didn’t get any important development too. Belmont and Sypha spent the whole season in random village which also added nothing to their story or the main plot, which is supposed to be a confrontation against Carmilla now. They just killed another completely generic hell monster in the end which was hiding in the church and that’s it. They were literally walking in circles around that church for several episodes doing nothing more. Very impressive progression and writing /sarcasm. That monster was only one of Dracula’s remaining servants, just realize how much the whole scale of the story degraded when the writers didn’t have game plot to rely on anymore. Reminds me of the Game of Thrones horrible ending after the writers run out of the books material. Belmont was completely overshadowed by Sypha, who became a pushy ooc mary sue in this season. Ridiculous considering that he is actually the main character.

But what I think was the most disgusting and nauseating are those horrible pairings the writers created for their revolting smut scenes. Of course all of it is completely made up filler, nothing like this was in the games. It was quite literally a writing on the level of horny teenage fangirls. The writers seem to think that if they are sadistic pieces of shit who like to torture characters that means everyone would enjoy it too. But most viewers are not sadists and always want a good resolve for their favorite characters. So, instead of giving Hector some kind of salvation and rescuing him from the captivity, which everyone wanted after the last season, those scum of a writers continued to make him suffer. They even turned it into some fetish it seems, alluding on making him ‘pet’ of new slut Lenore. That’s some shit straight out of garbage ‘kinky’ fanfiction. I can’t believe they actually showed this trash on screen. Hector is a main character of his own Castlevania game by the way. But here they constantly humiliate him and made him into a slave again, also forcing him into absolutely meaningless dirty pairing made only to show nudity. I don’t know who could like this shit except for brainless wankers and bitches who don’t care about characters themselves.

Another terrible bed scene involved Alucard with a pair of Japanese literally who characters. Again, random filler nobodies created only for a dirty scene with one of the main characters - that’s a textual definition of smut fanfiction writing. And they are showing it in a series, how much lower could they get? Needless to say, Alucard didn’t have any reason to suddenly get into bed with two suspicious strangers. All ‘development’ of their relationship consisted of them becoming his students. To which he also agreed unnaturally fast without a second thought. Why would he sleep with his students who he barely even knew? Just because he felt lonely? That motivation may seem alright only to retarded teenage fangirls and the writers on their level of intellect. Besides, Alucard isn’t even a full-fledged adult. He mentioned in the first season that his body matured very fast while he still was a child mentally. So they showed a sex scene with a child in a body of adult. That’s another level of low trash, it isn’t just morally wrong, it’s practically criminal. And why would Alucard even want something like this when he isn’t mature enough? He needed friends, not an orgy with some strangers. Absolutely horrible and revolting what they did with him, it’s also a disgusting OOC and complete lack of consistency and understanding of his personality. And of course it ended in the most stupid and edgy way possible, turning straight from obscenity into some retarded drama. What was their reason again for wanting to kill Alucard? Because he didn’t tell them how to move a castle? Why did they even need to move it? Also even if they wanted to make a trap for him, they could have locked those magical bracelets on his hands when they were lying on a grass together, for example. That disgusting scene was absolutely unnecessary. Filthy whores from Netflix writers team are making people feel disgust towards Japanese people after this nasty season.

Besides repulsive and smutty het pairings the authors also didn’t do any good with the only lesbian pairing they had. They could have left it to the viewers imagination whom they prefer to ship among the vampire girls. But instead they pushed for hypocritical tolerance again and forced their token white/black ship with Striga and Morana. Striga certainly has some lesbian vibes about her. But she could have make up a nice couple with Lenore. It would have influenced the whole plot positively, because then there wouldn’t be any disgusting humiliation for Hector. A pair with a strong warrior girl and a gentle cunning girl would have been very interesting and cute. They could even schemed against Carmilla together, they are smarter than her anyway. But instead we got another aggressive propaganda of tolerance with b/w pairing. Morana wasn’t interesting or nice, her only purpose was be a forced representation of the person of color in the group. Apparently even LGBT pairings can’t be free from this racial agenda.

Smut in this season was so obviously shown intertwined with boring and unimaginative battle to make a ‘cool’ edgy episode with violence and sex. Literally the level of what underage morons would consider impressive and exiting. That’s the most trashy, cheap and tasteless series I’ve seen. The writers deserve a slow and gory death on the stakes.

#castlevania season 3 #castlevania netflix #isaac laforeze

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afanoftheglassscientists · 5 years

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The Glass Scientists Art-Style Changes

Hey yeah sorry but I saw someone complain about how the webcomic’s art style is jarring in the later chapters and that the noses are bad because they’re big and I’m back in full salt mode WHO WANTS SOME TEA!?

@glass-scientists your art-style has only gotten more beautiful as the webcomic continues and you work extremely hard on the comic by yourself and I am amazed you kept working on this for more than four years now while in a career and I hope you’ll be able to do so for the foreseeable future. When I comment on how your art changed please know that I’m not doing it to critique you. Okay you don’t have to read more of this I just wanted to be the 156th person to let you know you’re doing great.

ONE - The noses have always been prominent on the characters’ art design and having a big noses does not automatically make it look ugly. Admittedly there are artists out there who draw very ugly noses for very ugly reasons, but Sabrina Cotugno is not and never has been one of those types of artists. Yes, Jekyll’s nose is bigger, but is not the end-all, be-all take from his design changes.

Here’s him from Ch.1 Pg. 15.

And here’s him from Ch.7 Pg. 22

(And no, I do not know why the latter two picture are bigger.)

As you can see, the nose in the earlier chapters looks smaller, but Jekyll’s face is also a lot more...soft? Like think of ceramic pieces. You start out with soft clay and you mold it into the shape you want (but don’t forget to wedge don’t want it to explode in the oven) but then after the clay firms up a little you’re ready to carve it and give it a more pronounced form. That’s what happened in the later chapters: Jekyll’s nose, the shape of his jawline, his sideburns, hair and even his eyebrows has become sharper and more distinct. His nose isn’t just an attachment like a Mister Potato Head, its a part of him. To give him a smaller nose would mean changing his whole character profile.

TWO - Like Clay, Art Changes. Admittedly I was taken aback by the change in the comic’s art-style as well, but that will happen to literally any long-form manga or comic. Unless you’ve been doing comics for literal decades your art is going to change, because you’re going to change, and what you want from your art and the characters you create are going to change. Look at Bluechair by Shen on WEBTOON: while his artstyle has solidified these past few years his earlier comics are unrecognizable, because he’s been working on his Bluechairs comic for five years, often updating two or three times a week, and is currently on Episode 536 of Bluechairs, but technically he currently has 706 of them under the Bluechairs page. His comics are like the Sunday Newspaper kind of comics, so I’m not asking you to read his stuff starting from the beginning (in fact please don’t try to read it all at once: his early stuff is pretty good but let me remind you he has SEVEN HUNDRED AND SIX COMICS OF STUFF) but maybe read a couple of them from the beginning and then read some of his latest ones.

So yeah, its not unexpected from comics to change in style, either slowly due to how the artists gains a more experienced hand or by an intentional shift in art direction. Sabrina was in the latter camp, due to the fact that she felt the earlier character designs was too much like a Disney Princess Line-Up, which she mentioned in a page description that I cannot find but I know was real.

Honestly I really do like the more recent pages. I disagree that they’re less vibrant, because I think removing the high glossy sheen made the characters even more distinct from each other. Before the shift in artstyle I felt like everyone was getting the same brand of hair gel. Hot take coming, but the character who most benefits from this shift is Rachel, who’s been looking gorgeous these last few chapters.

THREE - Sabrina Cotugno has been working this story, these characters and the art of this webcomic mainly by herself, while still working a job as a cartoon director for multiple shows and is currently working on a project for Disney. She does not have a lot of time on her hands to fix mistakes and asking her to change things or give her “Advice” on her art is...I won’t say unwanted because that’s up to her as to whether or not she’d use that language, but I will say she probably doesn’t need your advice on how to draw art when she has already worked in professional spaces as a storyboard artist AND as a director.

Plus I’m going to be upfront here, and this is going to sound harsh: Do not fucking nitpick and tear apart content made independently unless warranted by offensive language or imagery, because not only is it unhelpful it is just plain mean. Yes, Sabrina has worked on shows before, but The Glass Scientists is not made by a group of people working together, with producers and press and editors to back them up. This is entirely her work. She is spending her own free time making this. This webcomic is hours, days, weeks, years in the making, in the wake of hot days, sickness, travelling, other deadlines and dying plants.

And to turn around and say “Oh the way you do the art now isn’t as good?” Fuck off with that. I’m not Sabrina, so I get to be mean here - You are allowed to admit you dislike these changes, but sending the artist messages directly telling them of your dislikes is an absolute garbage thing to do. Especially when you yourself are not an artist.

Like Sergeant Brokenshire has a beard in one panel but loses it in the next few pages. Cue the Cinema Sins ding noise I guess. Okay, that happens sometimes, she doesn’t have an editor to correct. Am I going to directly send her messages letting her know she did her webcomic wrong? Fuck no. She probably has been sent hundreds of “helpful” messages about it already, and guess what? She doesn’t have the time to correct every mistake because she has a job.

Of course if Sabrina or any independent artist does something horrifically offensive or even just something that makes you uncomfortable you are absolutely allowed to air your grievances. But so far Sabrina has been good so I’ve got nothing to complain about, and the asks she gets that do have issues with the webcomic she answers with grace.

So basically this wandered completely off from the nose discussion and into the ethics of fandoms for independently made webcomics, but anyway long story short.

The Glass Scientists is not yours and its not mine. It belongs to Sabrina Cotugno, and its hers to change how she sees fit. Get over that and enjoy the webcomic as it is and you’ll have a much better experience.

Sorry to sound preachy there. I’m not trying to act like the Fandom Police and I’m not trying to fight Sabrina’s battles for her. I just see a lot of bad fucking behavior toward other independent artists and I don’t want to see it here. I have been that anon who “critiques” or gives “helpful” advice to artists who had far more experience than me, so its not like I’m pretending to be above it all here. I’ve buried many a blogs because of my shameful past.

Most of this Fandom has been wonderful. Let’s keep it that way while it lasts.

Anyway that espresso really did a number on me. I’m about to crash and I’m getting the awful sense of deja-vu here. Sorry for being so salty on Fandom lately, I won’t do it again unless I see some real trouble. This has accidentally become a Midnight Post, so go to bed!

...Oh wait one more thing: PLEASE DON’T REPOST FULL PAGES OF THE WEBCOMIC!!! Access to the official page is not hard and despite a few hiccups (which is not Sabrina’s fault but the webpage itself) we have been able to see all of the webcomic. There is no need to repost the whole page and on Sabrina’s FAQ she specifically asked people not do this. If you want to read each new page and don’t want to refresh the website twenty time on Monday morning you can always follow her twitter or her blog “arythusa” where she posts a link to each new page after it uploads. In fact starting tomorrow I’ll be sure to reblog these posts to make sure you have a link available to click.

Okay now good night.

#tgs #the glass scientists

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monzterzack · 5 years

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You know what fuck it

Wanna know why I fucking hate and despise the Russo brothers? Imma tell you

The amount of spite that they have towards Thor Ragnarok is fucking outstanding, they hate the fucking movie, they hate the characters and are angry that taika reinvented them

And it was kinda obvious in infinity war, but their hate becomes even more obvious in endgame

They can't have anything related to Thor Ragnarok without going into a convulsive rage to ruin the Characters and the deph and messages they showed

To begin with, they went out of their way to make Thor, a fan favorite due to Ragnarok's recharacterization of the character, be the opposite of everything taika fought for

Thor is a joke, he is the comic relief now, and not even a good comic relief, they have everyone laugh at him and minimize his pain, treat him like garbage and make him a fucking asshole

In Ragnarok he is an optimistic sarcastic strong willed person, he lost his father, his kingdom and had to face the fact that he was lied to for most of his life, but even tho he also was in a depressive moment he still fought through cause and quoting

And he shows a deph that few Characters in this movies have, he can be silly and playful but he also is incredibly smart and a good leader

Infinity war strips him away of the support system he build, they kill off Heimdall and Loki, who are the closest people on his life and make valkerie and Korg go away to leave him vulnerable to everyone's fucking bullshit

And give him a fucking axe, even tho he doesn't need anything now, but I guess it isn't cool enough to literally cast lighting out of your hands

And in endgame they just fucking put a middle finger to Thor Ragnarok

They make Thor a "joke", and a pretty offensive one, people that didn't saw Ragnarok think he is an asshole, and pathetic, and people like me who did saw Ragnarok and who identified with the Character, well, they fucking slap us in the face

You know the worse part, his conflict is manufactured, it's bullshit, they bring him to the movie they think it's better (dark world out of all the fucking BULLSHIT) and bring a conflict he has moved past since 3 fucking movies ago

And you know why they did this? So they can still keep using Thor in other movies and saying "eh he sucks he needs another arc" and make him the "cool fucking hero" they fucking want

Cause a confident optimistic kind heart man isn't good for them

They don't want kind Thor, they want bitter jerk Thor, they want asshole toxic masculinity Thor, they want alpha male idiot piece of shit Thor to have a dick measurement contest with Peter Quill

they hate that Thor is incredibly emphatic and understands most people's pain

They literally make him the most asshole emotionally unaware person in the movie, who puts his pride above everyone else's emotions or needs

They fucking hate Thor

And I fucking hate them for it

You shouldn't be allowed to do this to such a well grounded Character, you shouldn't strip him of all good aspects of his personality and give him garbage personality traits that are out of character even for the first two movies, only cause you hate soft compassionate man

This sucks, the Russo suck

Not only they suck they are spiteful pieces of shit who went out of their way to ruin not only thor, but Bruce, hulk, valkerie, Loki and even fucking Korg, then they also ruined the conclusion and made Asgard the palest fucking place in all Earth cause "we can't have diverse people in Asgard"

And their spite is so fucking tactile, and so fucking evident that it hurts man

Cause they not only make fun of Thor for having a heart, they make fun of the audience for caring about Thor

And they make fun of people like me, who have trauma that we can't move past from, who binge eat cause we don't know how else to cope, and it's painful, cause the way they treat Thor is the way I get treated

It reminded me of all the times I have been brought to tears and how lonely and terrible it feels to not have someone on your side

A lot of the things they yell at Thor are the things I got yelled at, the jokes they make are exact words I have been told my whole life

So yeah, I fucking hate the Russo's, they are fucking hacks who enjoy Inflicting pain on the audience to elevate their white male ego, they hate every single movie that is more successful than them cause they can't deal with the fact that they just make the same fucking movie over and over again, they are fucking entitled assholes who ruin any Character they interact with cause they can't handle not making their precious Tony Stark into the absolute protagonist of the movie

And you know what I am done with them, fuck them, they took something that was genualy funny and clever and inspiring and twist it to be something to mock at, and then make fun of the audience for taking offense in their favorite character being turned into a fucking joke

For real FUCK THEM

#avengers: endgame #endgame

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skunky2 · 5 years

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Top 11 Worst Cartoons of the 2010′s!!

We had so many great cartoons introduced in this decade and while I haven't seen every last one I can say this decade was one of the best for animation in general! Sadly for every good animated show produced in this era there are also some bad apples in the bunch the following cartoons are some of the worst I have seen but please remember this is only my opinion if you like any of these shows then that's great continue to enjoy them don't let me stop you!!!

Now let's get this list started!!!

11. Cloudy With A Chance of Meatballs the series (2017-2018)

Ok before we talk about the show I want to make one thing clear I don't hate the films in fact I actually find them enjoyable even going as far as calling them guilty pleasures the show on the other hand is a huge flop compared to the movies were the films had creativity and fun humor the show lacks that in fact this is by far the most boring show to be based on a freaking film about an invention that makes it rain food!! The other problem I have with this show is it's set before the events of the films so Flint hasn't even become an inventor yet but instead it's about him in high school and apparently him and Sam knew each other already did they even watch their first film!? Also the mayor is the principle because why not seriously this has got to be the worst show based on a hit animated film it's so painfully unfunny that I question how kids found it entertaining to begin with!!!! Not every movie needs a tv series and this one proves it!

10. Total Dramarama (2018-ongoing)

Oh the pain to see the Total Drama series downgraded to this especially since the original Total Drama Island took a ton of risk for a show aimed at kids also how did we go from a series that spoofed reality shows to a bad Muppet Babies rip-off!! What's really sad is that creators have no desire to produce a new Total Drama series they just want to work on this. On the plus side it's still not as bad as other shows your going to see later on the list.

9. Super Noobs (2015-ongoing)

Other then the "how do you do fellow kids" title I wasn't expecting this show to wow me considering it was brought to you by the same dude that brought us Johnny Test aka the original most hated cartoon of all time I got the DA pics to back me up! The worst part is this show has a very interesting concept but it's ruined due to the bad humor and characters. The show is about a group of outcast middle schoolers who receive super powers in the form of power balls from aliens who then become their mentors and how they must save the world from an evil virus that threatens the world sounds like an awesome plot too bad it's not pushed further.

8. Almost Naked Animals (2011-2013)

Yes this is a children's cartoon not a title for an X rated film. All I can say about this show is why? Why would anyone greenlight a show about an animal nudist hotel not only is it disgusting but those character designs yikes!!!! They look so ugly looking no one wants to see something that looks this hideous!! Not to mention the humor is just as terrible as the art design.

7. Breadwinners (2014-2016)

You know when you feature twerking in your show you automatically fail. The best way I can describe this cartoon is it's just awful first off the two idiot main characters who I'm not going to refer by name since they are some of the most stupidest names for characters seriously SwaySway and Buhdeuce!? Anyway the show is about these two "ducks" I say ducks like that since they look nothing like ducks they look like frogs or aliens or something. Try to make your character if they are an animal try to look as close as possible as the species they're supposed to be so it will make it easier for you audience to identify them. Well they fly around in a rocket car or something I really don't care and deliver bread to stock-image ducks which brings me to another problem they can't even draw background characters they just go on Google find a duck photo and photoshop cartoon eyes and whatever on it how lazy a can you be!! Also I found out a long time ago your actually not supposed to give ducks bread yeah it can use malnutrition and illness to them so this cartoon is spreading the wrong message to kids.

6. Brickleberry (2012-2015)

You know why I despise most adult cartoons because most of them are either trying way to hard to be quote on quote "adult" with overuse of swearing, gore, shock humor, and sex jokes and guess what this show is full of this!! Not only is the animation similar to that to Family Guy it's just as disgusting and offensive!!! The show revolves around these park rangers and their everyday lives at their jobs and the characters aren't very good either they are pretty much all assholes, stereotypes of usual characters you see in adult animation, and your typical characters that are just there to offend you! In fact the little bear cub character is pretty much the shows answer to Brain from Family Guy with the personality of Cartman from South Park. Now I haven't seen this show in a long time but I just remember it wasn't a pleasant experience if you want to check it out just be warned it's not for the faint of heart. Also the creators of this show produced another show for Netflix that is just a carbon copy with cops instead of rangers and I though that Seth McFarlane was lazy when it came to plots!! It's called Paradise P.D. btw

5. Teen Titians Go! (2013-Ongoing)

Yeah, Yeah, Yeah you've heard it all before this show is garbage, a disgrace to DC comics, stupid etc. The animation community has tore this show apart so there really isn't much to say that already hasn't been said but I will say this I never intended to hate this show as much as I do in fact I was fine with it when it fist came out I mean the original Teen Titians cartoon from 2003 will always be better then this show in every possible way but I wasn't one of the fans to jump on the hate wagon when this was announced I mean I had nothing wrong with it just focusing on comedy if you remember correctly the original had eps that were just as silly and bizarre. The main reasons why this show is so high up on this list is for the following reasons the first is I've never seen a show like this disrespect a fan base this much it's like the creators have it out for the original fans and they get joy out of mocking them with all these pathetic critic call out eps they do it also shows that they can't take criticism at all!!!! Second is how the creators view their show and animation in general they literally came out in an interview and said the reason why they made the show so stupid is because it's for children you do know kids aren't stupid right guys they deserve shows that don't try to talk down to them!!!! But the main reason for my anger towards this show is how they made an episode awhile were the moral literally was that cartoons are only for kids and told the original fans to grow up!! Mainly the creators themselves have this warped mindset that I honestly wish would just die out that only children should be allowed to watch cartoons and that their show should be immune to all the hate since it's for kids so they use the "just for kids" excuse for their show being like it is. It's hard to believe they would even have a mindset like that when they are adults themselves making an animated cartoon show. I didn't mean to rant this long but I mainly hate everything this show stands for and sadly it's going onto to get 300+ eps. Personality I really think it's time for this show to officially Go not because I don't like it's mainly because it's showing signs it's on it's last legs and with that Sixth Titian thing they pulled this summer and repeating episode plots is starting to show that the writers are becoming burned out this show was never good but I think it's time it ended. There are tons of other reasons this show is bad but I rather not go into them this has gone on long enough already.

4. PPG 2016 (2016-Ongoing)

Well TTG isn't the worst reboot/spinoff Cartoon Network produced in this decade the honor has to go to this piece of trash Powerpuff Girls 2016!! Why was this made simple CN wanted more money so they made this show to sell toys yes that was the only purpose of this reboot to sell merchandise too bad the show sucked so hard that the target demo along with the fans of the original Powerpuff Girls hated it! There are tons of problems with this reboot that have already been explained such as god awful animation errors, bad writing, and let's not forget the memes those outdated memes. Not to mention they removed the character Ms. Bellum since the creator thought that having a beautiful, warm-hearted, motherly, intelligent and strong-willed woman on the show was offensive to the new generation! Not to mention they got rid of breast but they did allow the girls to twerk tho!!! Yes because having an intelligent good-looking woman with boobs is bad but kindergarteners doing a sexually explicate dance is fine!! Seriously I feel so bad for Craig McCracken it was bad enough he was screwed over by Disney but to have his show turned into this!!

3. The Problem Solverz (2011-2013)

If you want to know my opinion for the worst animated show Cartoon Network has ever made it would be this one! Not only is the show ugly to look at but it uses enough bright colors to make your eyes bleed. The show is about these detectives who solve problems in their home town too bad they cause 90% of the problems they need to solve. These characters are so nasty to look out we got this ugly fish-like man, some robot, and a big nosed hideous lipped Domo wannabe. It was cancelled from tv but ran it's final season on Netflix. I still feel pain for any child that had to sit though this.

2. Pickle and Peanut (2015-2018)

Ugh this show!!!! If you've never seen it you may guess this would be something on Adult Swims line up since they're more known for wired shows like this but no it's not from Adult Swim in fact you'll never believe who made this Disney!!! Yes Disney Television Animation produced this the very same company that bought us shows like Gravity Falls, Phineas and Ferb, Star Vs. and so on made this garbage. There are several problems with this show first off the animation remember when I said that Breadwinners was lazy for using stock-images as background characters well this is the same damn thing but in reverse they couldn't even animate a pickle and a gosh darn peanut this is a peeve I have with most modern cartoons if it's not for a joke then why use stock-images it just makes your show look lazy! Second the humor it sucks it's mainly is "trying" to be Regular Show since both characters are slackers and get into bizarre adventures. Also this show loves to show gross-out shots like the ones in Spongebob for example but unlike Spongebob these are not funny and just plain disgusting like how is this show fun for kids to watch I mean I can understand why kids love cartoons like TTG but I can't see any child liking a show like this!!! Finally we have to talk about the god awful theme song it's not even a theme song but a random robot voice listing off things adults think that children are into so pretty much they're trying way too hard to appeal to kids just like with PPG 2016. There really isn't much more to say about this show it's just awful and it's still hard to believe Disney had a part in making this.

Now it's time for the cartoon from the 2010's that I believe disserves the crown as the worst show from this decade. Out of all the shows I've seen this year none of them of completely disgusted me more then this one it pretty much has everything I despise in modern adult animation it makes Brickleberry look tame in comparison!!! It comes to us from our friends at Adult Swim may I present to you the cartoon that I consider the worst!

1. Mr. Pickles (2013-Ungoing)

I honestly don't know where to start on this one it's just god awful!! First it's got all the things I despise in adult animation shock humor, sex jokes, violence for the sake of it, and ugly character designs!! The show is about a family who owns a dog who is either the devil himself or one of his loyal followers and the dog does extremely messed up things to people stuff I rather not try to remember let's just say this show is MA for reason. If you have a faint heart please stay away from this show at all cost!!!

So there it is my opinions for the worst shows from this decade I hope you all enjoy it since I worked really hard on it.

I didn’t include Big Mouth or Paradise P.D. because I’ve never seen them but yeah I know they’re bad.

#top list #cartoons #my stuff #just my opinion #I'm going to make a best list soon #worst cartoons #ttg #cartoon network #nickolodeon #adult swim

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