#these are. but a few fandoms i enjoy. š.
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hiiii if i opened like 25$ emergency commissions for the next 24 hours so i can buy groceries tomorrow would yall š„ŗ commish me šš
id be spending like 1-2hrs per commission, depending on how much i vibe w what your idea is+wherever the flow takes me
#im talkin like.#sketch to line art to flats to colored sketch to lazy render#fanart#literally anything guys i like drawing fanart and i need cash š#gimme a simple or complex prompt lets collab#jjk#naruto#bleach#one piece#metal gear#mgsv#xmen#TENTATIVELY:#marvel#š«„š«¢#adventure time#rdr2#these are. but a few fandoms i enjoy. š.#ocs#are cool too as long as yall can provide references
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what: period cdrama // 40 eps, roughly 55 mins eachĀ
where: youkuĀ (you can also dl the app) //Ā youtube // coming up soon onĀ viki (usual disclaimer that i do not use eng subs so i donāt speak to the quality of subs)
why:Ā do you love watching a poor little meow-meow get tortured in a variety of ways before he decides to go fuck it, iāll be a demon lord and kill everyone who wronged me?? do you like enemies to fated to kill youĀ lovers??? do you enjoy PAIN AND SUFFERING??? this is the show for you
meet tantai jin, the cdrama fandomās newest obsessionĀ
cursed prince of the Jing kingdom who was sent as a hostage to a neighbouring kingdom. heās been unloved and bullied all his life - think, discarded and left to die by his own father, kicked around by servants, begging for scraps of food, abandoned and slowly betrayed by everyone around him... itās NOT GOOD buddies, you will watch his life unfold and you will become attached and want to let him do whatever the fuck he wantsĀ
surprise surprise this sad pathetic man will one day become
THE demon lord who destroys all of humanity etc etc. look at this wardrobe upgrade??? amazing. beautiful. bad for humanity but great for him. good job, bud, you did well.
ANYWAY this show opens with demon lord tantai jin (affectionate) going on his lilā murder spree (understandable). the fate of humanity as we know it to be rests on the shoulders of one li susu
to defeat tantai jin, she will transmigrate to the past into the body of ye xiwu (tantai jinās evil wife who whips him every night (not in the fun way sorry buds) and tortures/bullies him for because it pleases her) to try to kill him while heās weak, before he turns evil and amasses power. this is for the good of humanity!!! but also heās truly so pathetic in the past that she canāt quite seem to put her heart into it (thereās also this whole finding his evil bone and getting rid of that before she can kill him problem but HMMM) and decides that?? maybe if she shows him some care and love??? sheāll subvert his murdermurdermurder tendencies????
this is the gist of the show!! there are a few arcs that we go through like all good xianxia cdramas, so we get to see them live through a few different lives (think: ten miles of peach blossom, pillow book etc etc), and every single dynamic between them is SO GOOD!!!!! we have spicy enemies to lovers!! cutesy arranged marriage between strangers to lovers (who donāt communicate enough for them to be happy)!!! star-crossed lovers fated to kill one another!!!Ā
the show is so goddamn pretty!! the aesthetics!!! the cgi!!!! the costumes ohmygod, i have never wanted to buy so many headdresses before
LOOK AT THIS!!! HOW PRETTY WAS THIS!!!!
heās got this whole demon look LOCKED IN who else does it as well as my boy tantai jin
this show is very PRETTY but make no mistake there will be a lot of angst!!! thatās part of what makes it so good!! luo yunxi does Tortured, Feral and Derangedā¢ SO WELL i weep every time i see him on screen, i have truly not been Okay since this show started airing, buddies please join me in till the end of the moon hell, you will not regret it, promise šāØ
ā ā few post-finale thoughts so yāall go into it with full disclosure (and canāt yell at me for inflicting pain on yāall, just know what i am also Sufferingā¢) - stop reading from here if you want no spoilers for the show at all.Ā
trigger warning: there is some dubcon in ep 14 (stretches between approx. the 25:00-27:25 min mark) between ming ye and sang jiuĀ
we were all hoping for a happy ending, but this ends on a bad-open scale, depending on how you look at it. @minmoyuā has helpfully directed me to aĀ happy audio-epilogue which was apparently shot but didnāt make its way into the episode?? we still dk if the footage will be released as an extra?? we can all form a prayer circle and HOPE i guess
the plot is HMM the further to the end we get, probably because they had to cut the eps down, so itās a little choppy, esp the last few scenes??? idk idk. itās a bit exhausting to watch towards the end, because you root for ttj so so much and he tries so so hard and SIGH. i need another few working days to digest this, iām still a bit :/ about the ending
would i still rec the show, post-watch? yes! this show starts off really solid, and luo yunxi carried the show throughout. like. yāall thought lyx was good in ashes of love?? watch him in this. every single micro-expression was flawless. bai luās acting is always so dependable, and itās the same with this show!Ā Ā
this show has an a+++ ost (i mean itās got the king and queen of cdrama osts liu yuning and zhang bichen, literally how could this be bad)!! and CERTAIN side characters are so so good (pian ran my baby girl, ye qingyu who grows on you, decidedly NOT bingchang/tian huan/mo nv although i will concede that chen dulingās acting in this show was Incredible).Ā
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Oh hey, I've gotten a few followers/mutuals, so I guess it's time for a pinned intro post?
Demographic info (because it gives context to my words): Early 40s white fat cis queer poly pagan woman living in the wet corner of North America. My nearest and dearest are almost all trans/non-binary.
Personal (public facing): I'm an Aziraphale-coded hobbit. Like, so cozy and wholesome you might want to puke. I rewatch just the first disc of the LOTR extended edition because I love the Shire so much. I drink Earl Grey with milk and one sugar. (Or a good scotch, cause every Aziraphale needs a little bit of Crowley inside them, right Sheenie?) I read mainly historical fiction, especially anything set in (actual, not fantasy) medieval Europe and I was at one point a medieval music history nerd. I wear cozy sweaters. I love rain on ferns and April flowers. I make soup with things I've tended and harvested. I work a Wholesome AF job. I unironically hug trees. I'm deeply in love with the world.
Personal (in private): I'm deeply kinky. I'm primarily a Sensual Sadist with a significant Dominant streak. I often play as a Panther. I absolutely love consensual violence, and get great joy from hurting people who want me to hurt them. I've only really given myself permission to be that in the last year or so.
Fandoms: I fell in love with Good Omens in 2000 when a college roommate gave it to me. It was genuinely the funniest, greatest thing I had ever read, and I evangelized about it to anyone who would listen. S1 of the show immediately became a comfort show, and it got me through a time of massive loss and upheaval. I put it on when everything was too hard and I needed something that made me feel like everything was going to be OK. S2 - well we're all here still, aren't we? It dropped when I desperately needed One Good Thing for my brain to latch on to as I got through some intense pressure, and boy howdy did it lodge itself in me.
Other fandoms in roughly chronological order: Star Wars (original trilogy made me a child nerd), X-Files (first real social fandom, and intro to fanfic!), Buffy/Angel/Firefly, LOTR, Doctor Who, Torchwood (the only other show I've been driven to write fic for), Sherlock to an extent. OFMD and WWDITS are great fun, though not obsessions.
My Writing: Writing Index Here I'm really enjoying writing right now! I don't know how long this ADHD hyperfocus will last, but I'll take it while it lasts. My goal in writing is to challenge myself, create things I'd want to read, and have fun with it (for a definition of fun).
I'm also definitely working on being comfortable expressing the things I like and want and being unashamed about that. I worry too much about how my š side might reflect on my š side, and honestly, these shades of grey lovelies are helping me with that a lot. It's probably why I love writing Dom Aziraphale so much, because he is just so sweet and good and bright, and also a toppy BAMF who can make demons (and their Bentleys) do whatever he wants and wields a flaming sword against Satan himself.
So yeah, every time I make Aziraphale go to a dark place, and then come back again to being a ball of delight, it's helping me create a map that allows me to do the same (to a, you know, somewhat lesser and more reasonable extent). And when others read and like the things that come from the darkest corners of my brain, it makes me feel seen.
Anyway, you made it this far. Here are my cats for tax. Yes, I have one of each of the Kinds of Cats.
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Hiii, so I saw youāre taking Linzin requests sooooo
What about drunk teenage linzin at a partyš. (ill leave the rest up to you hahah.)
Hello anon! Thank you so much for the request and also your patience!
I hope you enjoy this piece ^^;;;
I've received all the other requests and I'm trying to work on them (plus brainstorming a few hehe) It may take me some time to tackle them with my work schedule, but I am still active in the Linzin fandom ā¤ļø
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Can I just. Thank you. For existing. And posting art. Because sometimes I look at how much content is out there for other ships and it feels like you're single-handedly carrying the Damon x Manfred ship. So much art over the years to scroll through, so much content for, what, theā¦ 7 people who like this ship genuinely? I OWE you for getting me into these two (and Blaise too as a bonus) and carrying the entire ship. Like, on days that are stressful or tough just THINKING of these two gets me giggling like I'm high, and I owe you for contributing the most to this. You, my respected person, are my saviour.
Thank you so much for these extremely kind words! I feel very much the same about those two and I'm honored if I can play even a little part in getting others into them as well.š I'm very glad my art has had a positive impact on you!
"Our" corner of the fandom feeling quite lonely at times, I think, mainly stems from the fact that most people who *would* enjoy the ship, be it in a platonic or romantic way, don't know it's a thing. It's largely fanon, it's hard to stumble upon unless you specifically go through Manfred's, Gant's, or Blaise's tags, which not many people do, and there doesn't seem to be much overlap between evil old men enjoyers and creators of juggernaut ship art either, so there's very little "cross-contamination" happening as well.
From what I've seen over the years, though, when people are finally introduced to the idea for the first time, their reaction is very often something like "I never knew I needed this in my life" - which, yeah, same! That's exactly how I reacted when I first found out about them. So, all in all, rather than unpopular, I'd say their dynamic is simply still largely unknown, and luckily, with enough patience, that can change. We're still not many, but even now there's already a lot more people both drawing and writing about them than just a few years ago! I'm sure that in time, there'll only be more. :D
Again, thank you very much for this kind ask. Real life has been rough lately and reading this cheered me up a lot. I hope you have a great day!
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I Want You to Show Me Weak
Fandom: Andor
Pairing: Kino Loy/F!Reader
Chapter 25/27 (7.2k words)
->start at chapter 1<-
<- Chapter 24
Summary: You're pretty sure Kino Loy hates you. He screams at you, grabs you, and shoves you against the wall, and it's becoming a problem because, well...it shouldn't fluster you as much as it does.
Warnings: Explicit rating, Smut, Prison, Prison sex, minor non-graphic injuries, Dom/Sub, sexual tension, dirty talk, praise, hair-pulling, choking, unprotected sex, oral, angst, orgasm denial, humiliation, slut shaming, references to domestic abuse, discussion of domestic abuse, minor violence, discussion of violence, description of violence, come eating, discussion about sexual assault, allusion to sexual assault, rough oral sex, throat fucking
A/N: New warning in the tag! And as you're looking at it, I want you all to remember that I enjoy a bit of messy realism in my smut. š
š Enjoy! Also, now that we're nearing the end, if you're expecting there to have been a secret plot to this story this whole time, it's best for both of us if you go ahead and leave that here at the front doorā¦the two of them, their relationship, and their growth were the real plot this whole time.
Work title is from "Poison" by Vaults. Chapter title is from "Daddy" by Ramsey. (Like I wouldn't put that in here, come on)
AO3 Link
Chapter 25 - I belong to you, I give you the power. You're the only one that I let in. You tear my walls down.
When Kino steps into your cell that evening, you meet him halfway.
Your movement is practically a lunge because you're still eager and itching from your lack of satisfaction that morning. Once you no longer had the distraction of work, it had grown into persistence while you were alone in your cell. One that took every ounce of effort not to indulge, but you didn't. You behaved.
He doesn't stop you or scold you, though. Instead his arms wrap around youāone hand pressed between your shoulder blades and one at the back of your neckāand he holds you tightly to him while his tongue delves into the heat of your mouth to slide along yours, drawing a moan from your throat.
You kiss him as though you haven't seen him in days. As though you didn't wake up in his arms that morning. As though he didn't kiss you passionately goodbye before leaving your cell with a whispered promise to take care of you later.
Your hands roam greedily over him. The slight contour of his belly and the ridges of his ribs. The shifting muscle of his chest and the hard line of his collarbone where the unnatural fabric of his uniform finally ends and gives way to flesh. He's always warm to the touchāhis skin a balm to your cooler body. Touching him is like stealing heat to soothe your sore, overworked hands. You want to sink into him and bask in it.
No, you want him to sink into you and set every inch of you ablaze with heat. You want to burn in his arms.
With a bit more urgency, your fingers trace up along his neck, which is thick and corded with even more muscle. The tendons there are drawn taut from the effort of working his mouth hungrily over yours. You can even feel the shifting and flexing all the way up into his jaw, you notice with a shiver. Every bit of him radiates strength and all of it is focused on you.
You whimper as a wet heat blossoms between your legs.
Finally, you slip your fingers into those untameable curls at the base of his skull. He lets out a pleased, muffled grunt in response. So you hook your fingers and drag them over his scalp, tugging gently on a few strands of hair as you do. He breaks the kiss to groan in pleasure.
"I've missed you all day," you whisper against his lips.
"Did you?" He raises a teasing eyebrow at you. He sounds almost out of breath, you notice with no small amount of pride. "All of me or parts of me specifically?"
"Well, those parts are nicely attached to you and you use them wonderfully, so all of you." You grin as you press forward to kiss him again.
His hands slide down your back until they reach your hips. With another grunt he pulls you flush against him, and you whimper as your stomach meets the hard bulge of his erection. He pulls away to growl into your mouth, "Can you tell I missed you, too?"
"Yes," you breathe out. Then you slowly grind yourself into him, working little twitches from his cock and causing his breath to hitch. "Feel free to show me, though."
"I see you're still being impatient." He narrows his eyes at you in warning.
You, on your knees, tied up with your own uniform, and sobbing while you plead with him to touch you.
You freeze.
Your sudden lack of movement has him humming in satisfaction.
"Much better. Look at how well you can behave for me." Then he leans forward and whispers in your ear, "Especially when you're properly motivated."
You go weak-kneed and melt against him, your fingers clutching the front of his uniform. It's like leaning into stone for as little as he shifts under the sudden brunt of your weight.
"You know," he nuzzles against your jaw with his nose, "I've been giving a lot of thought to what you said to me."
"What I said to youā¦?" Your mind races to come up with context for what he means. Unfortunately, your brain is currently too clouded with need to find any. "You'll have to be more specific. I've said a lot of things to you." You turn towards him, your lips nearly brushing over his. "And some of them were pretty filthy."
"Does, 'I'd let you do anything you want to me' ring any bells?"
"Oh." The memory of being bent over in front of him while he teased your opening cuts through the fog of lust. Of stroking his cock that morning and offering to give him anything he could ask for. Then the realization of what it means that he's bringing it up dawns on you. You feel a sudden flush of heat and thrill as you lean away to look at him properly. "Does this mean you thought of something?"
"I did." He looks pleased with himself and that only causes the excitement within you to build.
"What is it?" You stare up at him in thinly veiled excited curiosity. Because this is something new. It's something he wants. "My ass?"
"You're clever." The low gravel of his voice sends shivers straight to your already aching sex. "I'm sure you'll catch on quickly."
You open your mouth to protest, but his nostrils flare and his jaw clenches, as if he's daring you to continue.
"Okay, Kino." Your posture shifts as you submit to him. "Tell me what to do."
The look of pride on his face nearly brings you to your knees again.
"Lie on your back across the width of the bed. I want your head hanging over the side of the mattress." He sounds so calm. If he's feeling eager at all, he hides it well. Sometimes it feels as though he has an infinite supply of patience and self-control. While you haveā¦well, a rapidly dwindling stock on hand whenever you're around him.
"Okay." Without hesitation, you pull away from him to strip your uniform off. Then once you're bare for him, you begin climbing onto your bed to do as you're told. It takes you a few tries to get into the right spot so only your head is leaning back and not your shoulders as well. You also have to keep your legs bent and knees pulled up to even fit on the narrow mattress, but eventually you settle in and he gives you an approving nod.
You look at him upside down. From this angle, the bulge in his pants is directly in your line of sight. As he begins sliding the top of his uniform over his head, another thought you had while you were on your knees yesterday suddenly comes to mind.
"You're going to fuck my mouth."
He bunches his shirt and tosses it to the side, the muscles in his arms and chest flexing from the casual effort, and he stares down at you in challenge. "Your mouth? Are you sure about that?" His hands move to his waistband and you gulp in realization.
"My throat," you say quietly. Then you take in a shuddering breath because vocalizing it makes it real.
The corner of his lips quirks into a pleased smile. "I told you you would catch on quickly."
But he must see something in your expression as you continue to stare up at him, still wide eyed and trying to process what that entails. Something that gives him pause. Because then his hands move away from his waistband, leaving it undisturbed. Instead, he settles his palms on either side of your jaw and lightly cups your face. As though you're delicate and not about to get throat fucked.
"Still mean what you said? Or would this be too much? Because now's the time to speak up." The edge and the teasing are absent from his voice.
You unconsciously lick your lips as you look up into his eyes and the idea still bounces around in your mind. Despite your shock, of course you still mean it. How could you ever say no to him? "I do. God, do I still mean it."
"Do you trust me?" He whispers as he gazes down at you with a tender expression. His blue eyes, soft and searching for any hint of doubt on your face.
"With my life," you vow without hesitation.
"Good. But you let me know if you need me to stop for any reason." His thumb brushes over your cheek, barely touching your skin. You shiver at the ghost of a sensation. "This isn't a punishment. I don't want it to just be pain and misery for you. Okay?"
"Okay, Kino. I want to give this to you." You place a hand over his much larger one and give it an encouraging squeeze. "Let me."
That's all the reassurance he needs. His unheld hand shifts back to his waistband and he worksāslowly and efficientlyāto pull his pants down past his hips.
Finally, his erection falls free in front of your face. For a second you swear you go cross-eyed taking it in because god you remember now just how thick he truly is. You swallow heavily, and the first bit of real doubt itches at the back of your mind. Because how the fuck are you going to handle that? When you're on your knees you have the leverage to pull away or change the angle. But like this? You're completely helpless to him.
As terrifying as the thought is, you still feel a responding flutter at your core. The idea of being at his mercy is tantalizing, despite the circumstances.
You look past his length, up into his face as he stares hungrily down at you, and you know you're going to do everything you can to try. For him.
"Be so good for me," he whispers as his thumb moves over your cheek againāfirmer this time. The grip on your jaw tightens as well, his fingers finding purchase along the bone. It's a reminder that the gentle negotiation and communication are done now. He's in control again.
Then, with his hand gliding his foreskin down the length of his cock, he guides himself to your waiting mouth.
Which snaps shut.
Instead, he nudges into your closed lips, your last defense against what is about to happenāand your last bit of defiance as well. Despite wanting to make this easier on yourself, you know he'll enjoy it far more if it isn't.
He growls in frustration, and an involuntary shiver whorls its way up your spine.
He prods against you again, harder this time and with hope you'll be good. That you'll behave and open up for him. When you don't, the exposed tip of him drags across the seam of your mouth, leaving a smear of precome behind. There's a snarl from above you. Then his fingers dig into your jaw and his thumb presses against your cheek where your teeth are clenched together, as if he's trying to pry you open like an oyster. As if wants to be inside of you so badly and knows how close he is to getting it that he doesn't think to scold you first. All he can do is take.
It's better than you imagined.
You part your lips to moan, and he uses the opening to force the head of his cock into your mouth with an exhale of relief.
You're grateful he stops there.
You're fully aware you could be choking on his cock instead, so you quickly close your lips around him. Then you begin to swirl your tongue over him and lap at his leaking tip in apology for misbehaving. At this angle, you can't quite tease the sensitive underside, but the effect it has on him is still immediate. He groans and slides further into you, forcing you to open wider until the shaft of his erection is resting along your tongue. You suck and lick at him with even more enthusiasm, which earns you a surprised hiss as he sucks in a breath. You know then any lingering anger at your disobedience has dissipated under the attention.
He starts out rocking gently at first, barely getting deeper with each thrust. What he's actually doing is holding backā letting you acclimate because a part of him is still worried about hurting you or pushing you too hard. It's unnecessary, you think as you grunt in frustration. It's only making the anticipation worse.
You stretch forward and squeeze your lips hard around him, increasing the depth and pressure as he thrusts in. He lets out a long groan and twitches against your tongue.
"You want me to hurry up and fuck you?" He teases. Though the effect is ruined by the rough, breathy tone of his voice. You can tell he's already enjoying this.
You hum around him in affirmation. That's exactly what you want.
"That's my girl." Then he plunges himself part of the way into your throat.
You choke immediately and your hands scramble in instinctive panic along the mattress at the intrusion. 'It's too much!' You think. You can't do this. But then your rational mind kicks in and reminds you that you're safe. You can breathe. He won't give you more than you can handle. You can stop this if you need to. So you take a deep breath through your nose and force yourself to relax your hands and your bodyābut most importantly your throat.
"There you go, pet. Just breathe." When he thrusts in again, a bit deeper this time, you tense, but you don't panic. "Just like that," he growls.
His grip on your jaw tightens. Before, his hands were keeping you steady and grounded as he worked his way up to fucking you. Now he's holding your face still while he uses your throat. There's a painful swelling and throb of need between your legs at the thought.
"Oh, fuck," he moans. "God, you feel incredible." He pulls out all the way, momentarily giving you relief so you can suck in deep breaths of air. A thread of spit trails obscenely from your lips to the tip of his erection. Your tongue darts out to lick it away, drawing a little gasp as he stares down at you. Then you nod to let him know you're okay, and he slams into you again with a deep groan, making your eyes water.
"Look at how well you're taking my cock," he says through gritted teeth. "You're so good for me."
Your nails dig into the vinyl material of your mattress in elation at the praise.
"I've wanted to bury myself in your mouth since you were on your knees in front of me last night. But this is so much better. God, the way those beautiful lips of yours are stretched around me."
His hand wraps around your throat, the large expanse of his palm engulfing the column of your neck. You feel bird-boned beneath the strength in that grip, in his fingers, conscious of the fact that he could squeeze the life from you if he wanted and there is nothing you could do to stop him. The thought is arousing. Not the flirtation with death, but the complete certaintyāthe absolute, unshakable trustāthat he won't.
But he's not choking you with his hand or digging those thick fingers into your flesh. He's feeling where he's moving within your throatāproof of how deeply buried inside of you he truly is. You swallow around him, letting your muscles work his length, and a groan is wrenched from his chest. The vibration of it curls down through your stomach and settles into your core.
He pulls out completely again, giving you another reprieve. Though his hand stays wrapped around your neck. His touch still isn't smotheringāit's possessive. It's as if he's claiming you. Reminding you of who you belong to.
As if you could forget.
Everything about this act should be filthy. It should be messy, unrestrained lust as he takes, nothing but need and force. And it is all of those things, but at the center of it and driving this forward is raw intimacy. Your body's response to him in this moment rivals looking into his eyes as he says he loves you.Ā
Because this is something that he's wanted. He craved the feeling of the act itself, yes, but you know it's more than that. It's the thrill that your trust and submission gives him. The power over you. That you would let him use you in this way is proof of your devotion.
So you give yourself to him, and your heart flutters with every noise that spills from his lips. Every gasp and shudder, more than physical pleasure. It's a satisfaction that you feel deep in the core of your being.
And then he does squeeze.
"If I put pressure, it makes your throatā" he pauses to groan as he drives in, "āso much fucking tighter for me."Ā
Your eyes clench shut as you feel your gag reflex kick back in at the extra force. The muscles in your throat clamp down around him and your hands grope at his legs. Just when you think you can't take anymore and are on the verge of panicking, his grip relaxes. Then he pulls out just far enough to ease your panic.
His thumb skims reassuringly over the crook of your neck as you breathe through your nose and get your bearings again. He didn't give you more than you could handle, you tell yourself, just like he promised. Once you're properly calm, you tap against his thigh to let him know he can continue.
"Good girl," he grunts, his hips jerking forward to meet your lips. "You're being so very, very good."
His continued praise sends a rush of heat between your thighs, reminding you of your own neglected arousal. Your hips begin to writhe eagerly along the mattress, seeking any sort of friction or sensationāa response which does not go unnoticed.Ā
"Touch yourself," he orders. "I want to watch while I fuck you."
You obey by reaching blindly between your legs and cupping a hand over your mound. Even that small bit of pressure is enough to send a shudder through you. You can barely see his face around his cock now, but you see enough to know his attention has shifted from your mouth to your lower half.
With a firm, deliberate touch, you rub along your slit and the rhythm of his thrusts falters. So you repeat the movement, this time rolling your hips to meet your fingers and dragging higher untilāfinallyāyou brush against your clit.
He growls and ruts into you.
"I love your mouth. I love watching you suck my cock. But there is nothing in the entire Galaxy better than being in your cunt," he says in a low rumble.
You want that. You want that so badly. Your fingers speed up and you let out a whimper.
"You like the thought of that?" You lift your hips a few inches off the bed as your fingers tease and dip into your entrance, hoping to get a reaction from him. He plunges deep in response. "Want me to fuck you properly?"
You can't make any sounds with him in your throat again, but you need him to know how much you want it. So instead you pull your knees up higher and spread them wide, putting yourself on display for himāto tempt him while you greedily finger yourself.
"Look at your pretty hole. So wet and desperate for me." His thrusts are starting to get rough, which is making your eyes water. "Just from my cock in your mouth."
He's also starting to sound tense and distracted, and you're worried he's going to end up too far gone to stop. That he won't actually fuck you. In one last desperate attempt to get him between your legs, you drag your fingers along your folds and spread yourself open, giving him a full view of exactly where you want him.
It's finally the last straw because, without saying a word, he pulls out so quickly that you nearly choke again and takes a half step back.
You lay there, catching your breath. Your eyes are red rimmed and watery, your lips are swollen from the pressure around his cock, and there's drool all over your faceāeven up to your nose. You're a mess, but he gazes down at you in reverence. As if you were something sacred. Even as you cough and gasp for air, you can see every bit of love he has for you in the blue of his eyes.
"Kinoā" You try to speak, but it comes out hoarse from so much abuse.
"You're stunning," he whispers, either oblivious to your struggle to talk or because of it. "You were so good for me and gave me everything I wanted."
If you weren't already burning and sweaty, you would be hot faced with pride. You swallow a few times, getting the muscles to relax back into place. Then you clear your throat before trying again. Your voice is still strained, but it's strong enough now that you can push through the tightness and the pain. "Kino, please fuck me. I've been desperate for you since this morning. Please." Your voice cracks, breaking from the new use.
"But you're doing such a lovely job of begging..." He places a hand to the side of your face, enveloping your cheek in his palm. Despite how much you want to give in and nuzzle into his touch and place tiny kisses along his fingers, you roll over and push yourself to your hands and knees instead.
"I can beg more, if that's what it takes." You raise up so you're eye level with him. There's a slight flare to his nostrils and you can tell he likes the thought of that.
He tilts his head to the side and waits.
You shuffle forward over the now sweat slick mattress to the edge of the bed. Then you bring your face close to his, your mouths hovering barely an inch apart. "Please," you breathe against his lips, "I want your cock inside of me so badly." You reach down and take hold of one of his wrists. He doesn't resist as you guide his hand between your legs. "Feel how much I want you."
He draws a fingertip over your damp folds and you let out a gasp. His eyes grow heavy and his lips part with desire. You know he's thinking about how good it would feel to slide his cock into that wet heat. You're so close to getting him to snap.
"See?" You let go of his wrist to run your hands up his chest, along his neck, until you're tracing your fingers over the stubble on his jaw. "All for you."
You finally close the distance to capture his lips in a hungry kiss. With a growl, he wraps his arms around you and crushes you flush against him to kiss you back. Soon the two of you are a tangled mess of limbs and tongues, and one of his hands has found its way down your back to squeeze your ass.
You pull far enough away to sob out, "God, I need you!"
He quickly brings both of his hands down to grasp the backs of your thighs. Then he pulls you off balance and lifts you off the bed. You gasp in surprise, latching onto his shoulders to keep from tilting sideways. But when he settles your legs on either side of him, you instinctively encircle his hips and hook your ankles behind his back. Then you squeeze, bringing the two of you together until his cock is pinned between his belly and your sex.
"Oh fuck, Kino," you whine and squirm in his arms. "Make love to me."
He shifts his hands under your ass so he can lift you higher, his length sliding against your folds as he does, until the tip of him is right at your entrance.
"Say it again," he demands, his voice harsh and rough. "Beg."
"Fuck me," you plead. "Please fuck me!"
He lowers you down, gravity doing most of the work for you, and then he's sliding into you. Your walls stretch and grip around him as you envelope his cock, and you both let out echoing moans into the space between you. When you bottom out, his hands grab at your ass as his hips press forward, trying to get deeper still.
"I love when you beg," he rasps out. "So needy for me."
"Always!"
Your legs flex and brace as you ride him. Your only support is your own hands clinging to his shoulders and his hands cupped under your ass, lifting you up with every roll of your hips. Some distant part of your brain wishes you could see his arms right now. Could watch the way his muscles flex as he forces you to keep moving onto his cock. You moan at the thought.
Another part of you wishes there was a decent wall in your cell that he could shove you against as he fucked you. Because, while it feels incredible to have him inside of you, you're struggling to keep your grip and your pace, and it's using nearly every muscle in your body to do so. Muscles which are starting to burn.
And you need more.
He must feel it too because without warning, he takes a step forward and slams you back down on the bed. The wind is forced from your lungs at the impact along your shoulder blades, but before you can catch your breath, he starts pounding into you at a relentless pace. His hands grip your hips, his fingers dimpling your flesh as he forces you to meet every one of his thrusts. Your sweat covered body jolts and slides along the vinyl.
"Are you ready to finally come?"
You nod, dizzy from the combination of hitting the mattress and the way his hips are crashing into yours.
"I want to hear you say it," he growls.
"Yes, Kino," you whimper out, making a needy little noise in your throat. "Please. Please make me come."
"Good girl." Before you can react to that, he groans and collapses forward, his hand catching his weight on the mattress before he crushes you. The angle changes into something delicious. Electricity arcs through your belly as every thrust meets your clit. "I'm gonna take care of you."
Then he buries his face into the crook of your neck as his hips rock into you. Every part of you feels surrounded and consumed by him. Like he could melt into you. You close your arms around him and tighten your legs on his waist, trying to speed the process along.
"I want to feel how much you've needed my cock." His voice rolls over you like gravel. "I want to come with your cunt squeezing me. Let go for me."
You've been teetering on that edge for what feels like hours after carrying this morning's interruption throughout the whole day. Now with his hands grasping at you, his hips rolling into yours, his breath on your skināyou let go. Your head falls back against the mattress and your lips part in a strangled cry as your climax engulfs you, making your vision blur and your toes curl. All of your nerve endings are reduced to static.
"Oh, fuck, you feel so good!" He buries himself as deep as he can getādesperate to feel the way your walls pulse around his cockāand then he tenses while you continue to grind mindlessly against him. A second later, he lets out a low groan right into your ear as he throbs and comes inside of you, which sets you quivering further. As his release subsides, he jerks and grunts a few more shallow thrusts into you, chasing every last bit of pleasure from your wet heat.
When both of you are finally spent, he stays bent over you, gasping and panting into your neck.
You could lay there with him forever, nuzzling back into him and feeling his heartbeat where his chest is pressed against yoursābut too soon he's pulling away. You open your mouth to protest.
"It's alright, Pet," he says reassuringly. He scoops your legs up and maneuvers you lengthwise along the bed to make room for both of you. Then he climbs in next to you before flopping down on his back, exhausted.
You lay curled against his side, your leg tangled with his, your head resting on his shoulder and tucked under his chin, his arm slung around you and holding you close. His other hand wanders over your jaw, your cheek, down the length of your armāsupplying you with gentle, loving touches everywhere he can reach. Meanwhile, your fingertips tease patterns through the hair on his chest, stopping only to press over a little freckle on his sternum.
"Are you upset about last night?" You finally ask quietly, breaking the comfortable silence of your shared afterglow. You haven't spoken about this yet. You've wanted to, but there hasn't been a perfect moment to bring it up until now. Now that the ever persistent itch for him has been quieted to a whisper.
His hand stills where it's stroking the side of your neck and your entire body follows suit, tense with worry. He doesn't say anything, though. Instead he moves a finger to your chin and urges you to look at him. You hesitate before meeting his eyes, but there's no anger or disappointment in them. The stare he's giving you is pensive.
"No, pet. I'm not upset." He releases your chin. Then he shifts to caress the shell of your ear with the rough pads of his fingertips and sweep his thumb across your cheek. "Did you think I would be?"
"Yes," you respond truthfully. You didn't realize just how anxious you'd been about this until the knot in your stomach loosens at his words. "Not at me, but in general. I know how important it is that you maintain the floor."
"I was at first. Mostly from embarrassment." He lets out a chuckle that rumbles through his chest beneath your palm, and then he sighs. "But Threl was brutally honest about every detail. He told me what people heard and how they reacted. And as I thought about it throughout the day, I realized it didn't matter. We have to be careful in the future, of course, but the rest of it? As long as I have you, I can handle the rest of it."
"Kino," you breathe out softly, touched by his admission. You hook your arm across his belly and pull yourself closer against him.
"I realized something else, too," he continues. "The work matters, but only to a point. It's the people on this shift that truly matter. Their safety and humanity matter. Not this place. Not the parts or the rules. I forgot that for a while. I lost sight of it through my own anger and frustration and became a very bitter, selfish man who thought only of himself."
You frown as you look up at him. "You weren't selfish. A hardass, yeah, but never selfish."
"That's sweet of you to say, but I was." He shakes his head to stop you from protesting further. "I wanted the numbers and order so they would leave us alone and I could get out of here. I didn't care if people suffered in the process. I thought it was better than the alternative. In reality, I was just doing their dirty work for them, and what does that make me?"
You have no easy response for him. You know what he's implying, that his compliance made him just as bad as the people keeping you all here, but the answer is far more complex than that. He's not taking into account that he's a victim, too. You hope one day you can help work through it and ease some of his guilt. But for now, you nestle against him and continue to offer him your silent comfort and support.
"But they're wrong. I was wrong. Fear and misery aren't sustainable. And like I told you before, I've seen how much of a difference morale makes. Our numbers are actually better now." His hand moves while he talks, gesturing broadly to the air. "That's why I let the tables talk more than they used to. That's why I let people laugh a little more often in the locker room and in the hallway, as long as it doesn't get out of hand. That's why I didn't put a stop to pushing the cell limit. As long as our numbers are good, why should we sacrifice everything to this place? They can have our labor, but the rest should belong to us." He presses a firm kiss against your temple, letting his lips linger so his words come out soft and slightly muffled when he says, "You helped me remember that."
"God, Threl was right." By now there are tears in your eyes and your voice is thick with emotion. He's fucking incredible and you can't believe he's yours.
He adjusts to get a better look at you. "Right about what?"
"I've softened you."
He huffs out a small laugh. "I suppose you have."
As you stare back at himātake in the stubble of his beard, the warmth in his eyes, and the lines on his faceāall you can think is that you want to spend the rest of your life with this man. You want him in your arms and between your legs as you submit to him. You want his hands on you, both harsh and sweet. You want to fall asleep and wake up next to him every day. You want him to continue surprising you like this, no matter what your circumstances are.
You've both said your I love yous and alluded to a future together, but you no longer want anything left unsaid. You've been there beforeāunsure if he wanted you, unsure if he loved you, and afraid to ask. You never want to live with doubt again where he's concerned.
You sit up on the bed and give him a hard stare. "We need to have a serious conversation."
He frowns back at you. "I thought that's what we were doing?"
"Yes, but there's another serious conversation we need to have."
"Alright," he says hesitantly.
You take a slow, deep breath to prepare yourself, intending to approach this delicately, but your impatience wins. So instead you blurt out, "How many shifts do you have left?"
There's a flash of mild surprise on his face. "Why?"
"Just answer the question." At his raised eyebrow, you add in a soft, "Please."
"Three hundred and sixty two." He sighs heavily through his nose.
"I've got six hundred and eighty left on my two year sentence."
"Alright. So?"
"So that means in less than two years both of us will be out. Onlyā¦you'll get out first."
"Say what it is you want to say." There's a hint of impatience to his voice, and you have to wonder if he's nervous about the direction of this conversation. 'That makes two of us,' you think.
"What I mean isā¦did you mean everything you've said to me?" God, his eyes are so blue. Like sky. Like leaping out of the door of a moving transport and falling, weightless, through atmosphere. Your voice lowers to a whisper. "Will you wait for me, Kino?"
For a second he doesn't respond, just stares at you with that deep frown while your heart pounds a frantic rhythm against your ribcage. You think you've fucked up somehow or broken the illusion of what this is by giving voice to it beyond the hypothetical, whispered in moments of desperation and ecstasy. You want to say something to take it back, but then his lips are on yours and he's kissing the words and doubt out of your mind.
When he breaks the kiss, he rests his hand on your cheek and his forehead against yours while he catches his breath.
"You drive me crazy, you know that? Out on the floor, in the hall, and especially in this bed." He sighs as he pulls away to meet your eyes. "Of course I meant it. I meant every lust filled nonsense you've ever dragged out of me."
"Including wanting to spend the rest of your life fucking me as often as possible?" You give him a small grin.
"Especially that," he says in that low gravel.
"Good," you whisper. "Then we're going to get out of here and we're going to do just that. Like you said, this place doesn't fucking matter. This is temporary. But you aren't. Not for me."
"You aren't either. I told you that you belonged to me." His voice lowers possessively as he lightly kisses your cheek, his hot breath tickling your skin. "That you're mine. Never doubt how much I mean that."
Your eyelashes flutter in bliss. "Then when we're apart, I want you to remember that I intend to always find my way straight back into your arms the first chance I get. And I'm never leaving."
"Good. And I want you to remember that when you do, I'm going to spend every moment I can buried between your legs." When you laugh, he gives you a fake, stern look and grumbles out, "I'm serious!"
"I know you are!" You continue to chuckle.
"Then why are you laughing?" He drags his hand down your back, over the curve of your ass, until it settles on the back of your thigh. Then he pulls you closer so he can kiss his way down your neck.
Your laughter quickly turns into a gasp. "Because I'm trying to stop myself from getting too worked up because the floor's going to be hot soon."
He grunts in frustration against your shoulder. "I didn't think I could hate this place more than I already do."
"Why? Were you thinking about fucking me again?" You bite your lip to stifle a moan as his stubble scratches across your skin.
"Of course I am," he growls and thrusts his hips towards you, grinding his hardening erection into your groin.
"Fuck," you whimper as arousal pools in your belly. "I hate this place, too."
He shifts far enough that his cock is resting directly over your sex. "How much longer?" He asks in a husky rumble.
You quickly crane your head to look at the little display in your cell. Then your stomach drops at the time. "Twelve minutes, so realistically nine or ten minutes."
He starts to rut against you as you gasp and moan, but his movement is half-hearted at best. It's as if he's holding back because he's debating with himself about whether or not that's enough time to finish anything he startsāto fully take care of you the way he wants. But before you can wrap your leg around his waist and rock back into him, his hips still and he slumps against you, resigning himself to the fact that it isn't.
You're frustrated that he stopped because it was just starting to feel so good, but you're also relieved it didn't go further so you weren't left a desperate, wanting mess, just on the edge of release. Again. Part of you is surprised he didn't take advantage of the fact that he could do just that. He does enjoy leaving you in a ruined state with orders not to touch yourself or alleviate that need, after all. But you're not about to protest.
Instead, he untangles himself from your limbs, gently moving them to the side, and sits up on the bed. "If I had more time, petā¦" He says regretfully.
"I know," you sigh and sit up next to him, your legs dangling over the side of the mattress.
He reaches out to hold your chin in his thick fingers. Then he traces your lips with the pad of his thumb. "I'll make it up to you."
"You always do." You give it a feather light kiss before looking at him in adoration.
"I don't just mean tomorrow. Someday I'll get the chance to make up for all of it." He's staring down at your lips, his eyelids heavy with a lingering heat, but there's also a tenderness to his expression that sets your chest aching. "You deserve more than this, and I plan to give it to you."
Your heart and your core flutter at the implication. "God, I love you."
"I love you, too." Then he's getting up off the bed to start getting dressed while you sit there, reeling from everything and trying to will your wobbly legs to cooperate when you stand up.
As he's pulling his pants up past his hips and settling them on his waist, he says, "I'm going to come here early tomorrow, if that's okay."
You look up at him in shock, your own pants frozen for a moment over your knees before you finish yanking them up. He rarely shows up early, and he's never actively planned to do so before. This is new, and, therefore, very exciting. "Yeah. Of course it is."
"After dinner?" He bends over to grab his uniform top from the floor, giving it a shake to unfurl the fabric, oblivious to the way that you're practically melting at the thought of getting to spend twice as much time with him.
"I'd really like that," you say softly.
"Good." He stops talking long enough to pull his shirt on. "Because I want to finally see if I can come inside of you twice in one night."
"Oh my god," you moan. The lust that had been slowly diminishing at the thought of spending quality time with him is violentlyāpainfullyārekindled. "So much for not getting too worked up."
He looks pleased with your reaction and gives you a teasing smile. "I take it you like the thought of that?"
"You know I do." You take a step towards him. "I especially love the thought of doing everything I can to make you."
He closes the gap between you and holds you by your hips. "Yeah? I bet that pretty little cunt of yours could make me."
"Fuck!" You whimper. "You have to leave before I rip my clothes back off."
"No," he says, and there's an edge to his voice. "You're going to control yourself for me until tomorrow. Aren't you?"
"Yes, Kino." You can't help but yield immediately to that tone.
"And you're going to behave."
"I will." You nod. "I promise."
"That's my good girl." He leans in to kiss you as your knees turn to rubber. "Because I would be awfully disappointed if I had to punish you instead."
You let out a sob at the thought of missing out on the reward he's now planted in your mind. And what he would consider an equal punishment. "Yes, Kino."
A/N: Truthfully, I stepped outside of my comfort zone to write this chapter and it's yet another thing that slowed me down to a glacial pace. I have never attempted to write anything like it before and I wanted to try something new, but I constantly felt like I got in over my head (hehehehe). I was worried it would be disappointing. Instead it took me over 6 months to update and I disappointed you all that way instead. ššš But I got over my block and I fucking did it! š„³š„š¾
Just don't ask me when the neck chapter will be done. I'm absolutely working on it and a chunk is written, but I will also be out of town every single weekend and one full week this October. But I'm hoping it'll be this month š¤
After you say your goodbyes and he leaves your cell, you know there are only a finite number of these partings left. 'Remember, this is temporary,' you tell yourself. But as you watch him disappear into the hallway and around the corner, you realize knowing that doesn't make every single time it happens hurt any less. It's just the pain that's temporary.
#kino loy#kino loy x reader#kino loy x f!reader#x reader#i want you to show me weak fic#andor fanfiction#andor#fanfiction#andy serkis
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āYouāve been a good boy havenāt you, Baz? So good, I think you deserve a reward.ā
The Spanking Dream by @skeedelvee
Happy holidays and Secret Snowflake exchange to @skeedelvee! I was so excited to have you as my recipient and decided to make embroidery fanart of your delicious, sexy fic The Spanking Dream. I really enjoy the way this fic explores the different approaches and desires Simon and Baz have the same sexual act. You're able to learn so much about them from a few quality spanking sessions š.
For more photos, embroidery notes, and gushing below the cut:
I knew from the start I wanted to do embroidery art for the exchange, and when I got Skee, I was starting to sweat a little! š
I used some new stitches for the first time with this piece and since she embroiders too, I'm excited to talk shop!
The Design
For the design of this piece I wanted to go for a fortune slip/occult vibe and drew inspiration from Ouija boards. The "Good Boy"/"Dirty Boy" represents Baz/Simon and of course the Sweet Dreams plays into the fic's plot of everything starting with naughty dreams. The hands with the peach is my best attempt at capturing spanking in an artistic way.
The Stitches
I tried some new techniques for this piece including using the fishbone stitch for the peach leaves and a few of the stars. The hands were an interesting challenge, too, since I was trying to have the statin stitch follow the direction the fingers were moving.
Super happy with how this came together in honoring a delightful fic and lovely person! Thank you @skeedelvee for creating such fun and beautiful art and writing for this fandom. It was such an honor to create this for you!
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2, 4 (about 'sit next to me before I go'), 30, 41, 48 for the fic asks š„°
Ooohh this is fun!!
Fluff (10)
Friends To Lovers (7)
Established Relationship (5)
Sexual Content (5)
Alternative Universe (4)
I feel like this is VERY representative of my stories šš fluff all the way!! And friends to lovers and au is really what I'm all about too!!! (Sprinkled with sexual content ofc)
I'm kinda surprised that I have 5 stories with established relationships because I feel like the majority of my ideas have to do with meeting and then falling in love OR realizing feelings after years of friendship. Those are definitely the stories I'm mostly drawn to write. But it makes sense that my three established relationship milex fics are the kinda sad ones š
Uh, first thing that pops into my head is definitely the bath scene! The way the scene is set, the ambiance, the way I can almost smell the bath products, see the flicker of the candles, feel the soft humidity on my face, the healing waves, the soft comforting darkness, it just exudes the exact vibe I was going for. I love incorporating all of the senses when I write and this felt so alive to me, I could feel it, smell it, see it all so clearly.
Also I really liked leaving in the details about Miles' clothes. In my head he was so clearly wearing the dark blue jumpsuit and those heeled boots and I enjoyed how I managed to show it in the story by having Alex help him out of it šš
I think maybe my most out of my comfort zone is "you just ain't the one for me" mostly because it's told from Taylors pov and it generally features her, the sex scenes, having someone else witness Alex and Miles and not being inside either of their heads. It's just very different but I feel like it made sense for what I was trying to do. Even if I'm fairly unfamiliar with her as a person, I feel like the character I came up with for her made sense.
I feel like it made me braver in terms of what I can get away with. And to know that a lot of things can be shown instead of said or told explicitly. A lot can be left up for interpretation. Even if some people would've liked to know what happened next, I liked leaving it up to the readers. (I feel like it was fairly obvious thoš) I also just like that it was something so different and people still liked it, so I know not to box myself in. I can be free and experiment with my stories and tell them in the way I feel makes sense, and still have people enjoy them ā¤ļø
Oh, that's too many to count! I'm constantly in awe of the pure skill and talent of the writers in this fandom, and I'd love to pick up something from all of them. I love how @yellowloid is so good at the deeply intense romantic stuff, just diving so deep and making us feel it too. I love the absolutely insane level of detail and expertise of @elorianna s writing and the way she incorporates real life elements, I love the world building and the cutting edge characters of @thranduil-aran-edhil. I love the humour and ingenuity in plot and character in @girlinthepictureframe s stories, I love the way @stereobone sets the vibe and mood of the fic and how they say so much with so few words (something I'll never learn šš), I love the absolute heart wrenching gutpunch @blacktrickle is able to write, I love seeing you use your real life profession as inspiration for the very best sickfics.. and so many many many more!!!
I love how people characterise our boys, I love how they come up with so many amazingly interesting settings, the level of detail in their aus and canon compliant stories, I love the fluff and the heartbreak.. and most of all I love how different they all are. And how I'm different from all of them too. And there's room for all of us, and so many more that I've forgotten to mention, and how we all learn and evolve as time goes on. My heart is full.
It's not a new one, but it's SO GOOD. The last fic I read was "Hotel Room" by weirdchick333 and it's just amazing. Their works are some of the very best I've ever read and I always find myself going back to read it when I've got a bit of time to myself. Highly recommend all of their absolutely incredible stories as they're just fucking class (but I assume most of you know that already šā¤ļø)
Thank you so much for your lovely questions !!! ā¤ļøā¤ļøā¤ļøā¤ļø
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I'm blocking everyone who proves my 2am point about being massively unfun to interact with but this is the accidentally-funniest & stupidest possible way to do so and I'm screengrabbing it first:
Bruh I said this this week:
A central part of my months-long sporadic evisceration of OFMD is summed up in this quote from me:
A big part is the fact that I can and have enjoyed mediocre or charmingly bad tv. I didn't need them to stick the landing. I was expecting to watch them stumble and probably drop some of the things they were too ambitious about, and I had metaphorical band-aids at the ready to patch up scrapes and go "well I've seen better execution, but we had fun!" I can work with the show and the fandom content if the idea was good, or compelling, or maybe even just enjoyable!
I genuinely think you're probably doing fandom wrong or at least in a pretty boring way if you are not into something "bad" because of the whole "really good things don't leave the kind of spaces fandom thrives in exploring" phenomenon. This is probably actually a pretty consistent thread to my fandom commentary from the last several years even.
I love talking about ways spn is "bad"!!!
I just also have (understandably) zero respect and a good deal of annoyance for the takes of people who have not seen the show and admit they are getting all of their information about it secondhand (from people who have only seen the first third of the show even) + memes they didn't fully understand. Like maybe you don't have an educated opinion? Like maybe you just say "I didn't like a few episodes" to yourself on your own blog and then stop talking because whatever comes out of your mouth next regarding what happened in the 15 year long show you didn't watch is probably wrong or lacking context. š¤·āāļø You know? Maybe you shouldn't tell other people what the correct opinions are about the show they watched and you didn't because you're pretty sure you got the gist from a joke they made???
Like my guy this is the exact reason we make joke posts to laugh at people being stupid instead of spending a week on propagandizing brick walls. š¤£š¤£š¤£ You just say shit like this with full confidence.
Anyway in my educated opinion from watching 327 episodes of Supernatural I can say that Destiel is actually in this TV show for real because it was put there intentionally by writers. Which honestly should not be controversial or surprising because you don't get romantic love confessions of any quality put in a show if the majority of creators don't want them there š¤Ø like who do you people think wrote the "I love you" from the jokes if not the guys who wrote the show?
[If you would like to disagree with me, please come back to start a fight after watching all the episodes and I'll block you for being an annoying educated opinion instead of an uneducated one š]
#please reread this in a highly amused and beffuddled tone if you didn't the first time because i'm on the verge of hysterical laughter#i'm getting lectured on the quality of writing my ship had in 2019-2020 by someone who heard a mutual bitching in 2011#like you think mentioning your friends are kripke era supremacists is a point in your favor š¤£š¤£š¤£ bruh i watched that#you fell for the hyper talented and evil cw pr guys which is understandable#but saying it out loud on other people's blogs IS still embarassing for you. i need you to know this.#fandom culture#spn#destiel#anon#ladyluscinia
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Doctober 2023 Summary
Completed 24/31 prompts!
List of all the prompts I did for Doctober 2023 below
So happy to be done š„³š„³š„³ššš
1. Sunrise: Tbh I donāt feel any which way about this one and I think itās because I created it to be a companion piece to Sunset. So its like lowkey half-assed but also far from it. Iām very happy with how that turned out so thatās somethingā¦
2. Desert
3. Gun Fightšš¤§ā ļø: Ah, the first meme post. I felt shaky posting this. Cherry, I hope you know I did it for/because of you
4. Light Blueš: Ah yes, the first Hell Valley angst post. Iāve always been super proud of it and Iām really happy that others are still liking/reblogging to this day! Almost a month later
5. Alarm Clockšā ļø: AH YES, the first post to really give me anxiety about posting. I was like this aināt a SIMPLE meme anymore, ITS GOT COMPLEXITY.
6. Ticking Time Bomb Ā
7. Familyš: This one was super wholesome and the first time in a long while drawing Jules and Verney!
8. Outatimešš: This one was a fun one! There was a moment where I wasnāt sure if I should do a backgroundā¦ Iām glad I still had fun with it, it took a lotta work hahaha
9. Zipline
10. Nuclear Ā
11. Briefcasešā ļø: We back doing goofy shit againā¦ but I really liked this one and had a lotta fun with it. definitely up there with Rear View Mirror.
12. Train Tracks Ā
13. Photo Albumš: This one was fun and gave me a break from drawing (aside from the days I didnāt do anythingā¦)
14. Coffeeššā ļø: This oneās so wholesome. But Im biased af
15. Inventionšš¤§: This is the first certified half-assed art piece LMAO im sorry to admit it but I gotta speak the truth
16. Stage
17. Einsteinš: This was really fun, I love poking fun at Biff but who doesnāt?
18. Letter Ā
19. Memory šš: Didnāt like the linework on this one I think thatās why I was feeling so negative about itā¦ or maybe the compositionā¦ overall, I think I can do better.
20. Rearview Mirrorššš„ā ļø: This oneās definitely the funnest one Iāve worked on and still makes me giggle.
21. Improvementš: I was stressing over trying to finish it so I donāt have the happiest memories of working on this oneā¦
22. Constellationšš: This oneās special to me so I was gonna love it no matter what lmao. I really enjoyed working on it even though I wish I had more time.
23. Nostalgiašš: One of the faves and always will be. The vibes are on point.
24. Record Playerš: The return of Hell Valley angst
25. CafĆ©š: Iām happy with the color palette. I want to revisit this one some other time cuz I feel like I could do more if I had more time. Not sure if I should categorize this under half assed attempt or not.
26. Anniversaryšš¤§: Yeah this was another half assed one, sorry
27. Thunderstormš: Angst and Hell Valley are synonymous at this point. I really liked this one, especially how it transitions from colored to black and white
28. Metallicšā ļø: Nimona. Thatās all I gotta say. Nah jk I wasnāt going to do this but the no pines timeline was really interesting to learn aboutā¦ and by interesting, I mean scary. But hey, it gives us another angle to the bttf storyline.
29. 2023ššš¤§: Talked about the musical. Drew a few doodles. Hair style reveal?
30. Sunsetšā”: Gives all the warm fuzzies, how could you hate it? Very happy with my use of color here.
31. Free Day (Halloween)ššā ļø: We donāt talk about this oneā¦ Itās the number one rule of the club š
What the emojis mean:
š¤§ Half Assed
š Funny/Meme
š Warm Fuzzies
š Angst
ā ļøĀ WHO LET ME COOK
š Top 5
š„ Funnest Prompt
š Spookiest
ā” Personal Fave
My goal for this prompt list challenge was to focus on quality over quantity. Thereās a few half-assed art pieces that snuck in, but it could have been worse. By quality, I wanted clean line art, backgrounds, and if I have enough time, color!
What drove me to create art: Showing other people that are in this fandom (most notably ā”@cheriboms). Iād love to interact with other mutuals on here. Shout outs: š@bttf-dork š@synthsays š@alex-a-fans. I feel like Iāve been doing that more towards the end of the challenge, but yall give me motivation! And sometimes, inspiration!
What I learned:
š¤ I can actually draw backgrounds if I actually try [wowowow who'da thunk] Itās much easier to draw a background from a reference rather than coming up with one on your own. So I need to keep that in mind whenever I feel discouraged.
š¤ I feel like my work is very dramatic. Like melodramatic fr. Or at least it can be... I blame watching those tv dramas with my mom when I was a kid. But then again, if you want to incite emotion out of an audience, you gotta know how to frame stuff and do all the fancy cinematography work. So you gotta be dramatic to an extent. I got really really bored with my ideas that werenāt telling a story(or rather a more interesting storyā¦). And that effected my motivation.
š¤ Looking back at the list, I noticed that my top 5s are all either silly or wholesome and Iām glad and relieved about that. I said that Iām really dramatic and thereās quite a bit of angst in there, but ig Iām not THAT edgy (or maybe the prompts didnāt allow me to beš¤š)
Things that I want to improve on: COLOR THEORY. Brush theory/line weight. Iāve been experimenting a tiny bit with this throughout the month, but I want to delve into it. Since I didnāt work on something for more than a day, I felt like I was throwing shit at the wall and seeing what sticks.š¤ŖI didnāt get to really study what colors work well and why and experiment with it.
A lot of the ones that Iām not very proud of could be chalked up to not having enough time to work on it/make it better, so thatās an interesting dilemma.
TL,DR; I talk too much. Gotta work faster smh git gud š
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Sandstorm - The Mandalorian
Fandom: The Mandalorian
Characters: Din Djarin, Grogu
Prompt: this was written based off this amazing piece of art!
Requested by: anonymous (by wish of the requester)
Warnings: some angst, but otherwise no warnings.
A\N: contrary to my other pieces, this isn't a whumpy piece. Some angst, but mainly just cute stuff š
Din looked ahead in concern at the huge reddish-brown cloud at the horizon. He knew exactly what that was: a sandstorm. Nothing out of the ordinary on a desert planet like the one he was on now, but this sure looked like a big one.
It would be at least another mile and a half back to where he had left the Crest, and Din was fairly sure the storm would overtake him before he made it back.
No, it would be wiser for him and Grogu to seek shelter someplace else, and wait it out until the storm had passed.
Din's eye fell on an abandoned trader's hut a few hundred meters to his left. It looked unkempt, but at least still somewhat solid. And since they were in the middle of nowhere, with not much else around, it would have to do.
"Come on, kid." Din lifted Grogu off the ground and into his arms. "We're taking shelter for a little while."
Din quickly made his way over to the hut. It took some effort to break the small wooden door down, which lead him to believe the structure was at least still mostly strong.
Din closed the door behind them, barricading it with a few big rocks which had clearly been used for that purpose before.
The hut consisted of only one small room. There was no furniture, apart from one rectangular wooden bench placed against the back wall. The tiny window in one of the walls provided the only bit of light inside.
Grogu cooed softly as Din set him down on the floor.
"I know," Din grumbled, "I don't like it either, but it's better than getting caught in that storm."
Grogu softly brabbled in reply, but finally sat himself down on the sand-strewn floor.
Din realized they could be here for a while. It was impossible to tell how long the oncoming sandstorm would last for, but it sure looked like a big one.
He sat down on the wooden bench. It creaked softly under his weight, but held him easily.
While Grogu busied himself with playing with a few pebbles lying on the ground, there wasn't much for Din to entertain himself with.
He watched Grogu play for a while, but slowly felt himself get more and more drowsy. The sounds of the storm coming ever closer didn't bother him much, nor did it make him feel uneasy.
Maybe a nap wasn't such a bad idea. If ever there was a good moment for it, this was surely it.
Din looked longingly at the rest of the bench beside him. Grogu seemed to be calm and enjoying himself, and he couldn't easily wander off somewhere, so he shouldn't have to worry much about the child's safety.
Din slowly took off his helmet and placed it quietly on the floor. He ruffled his flattened hair somewhat, before stretching himself out on his stomach on the bench. Resting his head on one of his arms, he turned his face to the wall. Grogu had seen him without his helmet on, but it still felt unnatural to Din.
He relaxed his muscles and closed his eyes. The soft sound of the pebbles ticking together, combined with the thunderous sound of the sandstorm closing in on them, was the perfect lullaby to drag Din to sleep.
---
Din wasn't sure how long he slept, but when he woke up the sandstorm was fully upon them. Sand swirled in through the small glass-less window and hurricane-like winds stormed around the hut, but the structure held on strong.
Din was about to let himself drift back off to sleep again, when there was a soft tug on his sleeve, and he immediately realized that was what had woken him up in the first place.
He slowly propped himself up on his elbows, and peeked over the edge of the bench he lay upon to look underneath it. His heart sank when he found Grogu sitting there, looking absolutely terrified. The child's drooped ears and wide eyes told Din everything he needed to know.
"It's alright," Din soothed, reaching a hand under the bench. "We're safe here, no need to worry."
Grogu gave a scared squeak and wrapped his tiny hands around Din's fingers.
"Nothing's going to happen, buddy, I promise," Din reassured once more. "Come up here, it's okay."
Grogu shook his head, making his big ears flap. Instead his hands wrapped even tighter around Din's fingers.
Din looked deep into those big, black eyes. He could see the fear in them, and most certainly Grogu's determination not to leave his safe space under the bench.
"That's fine," Din assured, tone fatherly, "you can stay there. Just hold onto my hand."
Grogu cooed softly, which Din took as a confirmation.
Din lay back down on his front again, head resting on one arm and face turned to the wall. His other arm limply hung over the edge of the bench, so Grogu could continue to hold onto his fingers for reassurance.
Din felt the child's soft hands squeeze around his fingers, clinging on for support and comfort. If it provided comfort to Grogu, than Din let him. And somehow it comforted Din, too, and he fell back asleep within minutes.
---
A single ray of sunlight shone into the hut through the tiny window. It hit Din across the shoulders and the warmth of it slowly woke him up.
He stirred, groaning softly as sleep left him. The fact that there was quiet all around now, meant the sandstorm had well and truly passed them.
His arm hanging over the edge of the bench felt heavy, and somehow he felt like he couldn't quite move his hand.
Din slowly raised his head to look under the bench. The initial frown on his face quickly vanished and was replaced by a soft smile when he saw why his hand was immobile: Grogu.
The child was fast asleep with his head resting in the palm of Din's hand resting on the floor, and he didn't look anywhere close to waking up.
Din smiled to himself. He never would have thought he would come to care for Grogu as much as he did. But when he saw Grogu like this now, sleeping sweetly and seeking comfort with him, Din realized how much of a unity the two of them had become and to what lengths he would go to protect Grogu.
Din carefully rearranged his body somewhat on the bench, mindful not to move the hand Grogu had curled up against.
The sandstorm was over, and normally Din would have jumped up and continued his way at first opportunity, but not now. Right now he would wait for Grogu to wake up. They weren't on a high profile mission, so staying here for another hour or so wouldn't make a difference.
But, Din had to admit, the real reason he didn't want to wake Grogu up was that he had grown to care deeply for the little creature. Secretly, Din liked the way Grogu slept with his head in the palm of his hand. So Din would wait and let Grogu sleep.
Request from my prompts list
Useful Links Section | Writing masterlist
#the mandalorian#the mandalorian imagine#the mandalorian fanfic#the mandalorian fanfiction#din djarin#grogu#din djarin imagine#din djarin fanfic#din djarin fanfiction#pedro pascal
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It's been kinda crazy here on Tumblr so i want to bring this back to bring some positivity (cringe)
This time it's just the Best of Times š
There are a few I've added
1. best part of Canon
2. Best part of Fanon
3. most chill character stans
4. Best historical Hetalia takes
5. Best fandom interaction
6. Shout out to someone on Tumblr who has the best takes for your favourite character
7. Underrated Character
8. Underrated Ship
9. Have you made any friends in this fandom
10. what character did you begin to love not because of canon but because how how the fandom acts about them?
11. Give the fandom a compliment
12. What makes this Fandom different in a positive way compared to other fandoms
13. Anything fandom related that you are proud of?
14. Any place now on your bucket list due to Hetalia
15. Any ships you've come to enjoy because of Tumblr
16. Iconic memes you love
17. Favourite fandom trends?
18. List three artists you want to shout out
19. List three fic authors you want to shout out
20. List three blogs you want to shout out
21. Favorite character?
22. Why did you start watching Hetalia
23. Have you introduced others to this fandom
24. Name something someone has done to make the fandom a more positive place
25. Have you discovered any media due to Hetalia?
26. Have you written Fanfiction for Hetalia
27. Have you drawn fanart for Hetalia
28. Any funny Hetalia stories?
29. Make an aesthetic board for your favourite character
30. Any silly Hetalia headcanons?
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For the ask game: R, Q, G? š
I see what you did there!
R - Which friendship/platonic relationship is your favorite in fandom?
I mean the easy answer is Zoscar XD So I'll do a different one, I really liked the relationship between Zolf and Sasha in s1/s2 since it really helped shape the both of them. Also Hamid and Azu were just so cute by the end. When Bryn used Lucky Halfling to save Azu, it was just perfect.
Q - A fandom youāve abandoned and why.
Oh god I've abandoned so many. Mostly anime ones I was super in to when they came ouy. The one I actually decided to abandon was Code Geass. Jesus fucking christ those shippers were nearly the death of me. I'm so glad tumblr didn't exist during that shows original run cuz anime forums were awful. CC vs Suzuka vs Karin vs anyone else Lelouch could possibly end up with....I couldn't enjoy the fandom anymore between s1 and s2.
G - Have you ever had an OTP?Ā If so, do you remember your first one? Who was in it?
My OTP changes a lot, I usually don't have anything super original, though I was one of the few people who shipped Hibari Kyouya and Chrome Dokura (1896) in KHR and because god knows het ships can't exist in anime (do you see my eyes rolling), me and others got hate for it which was stupid cuz I also shipped Mukuro/Hibari/Chrome (691896) and Mukuro/Hibari (6918) and Hibari with EVERYONE, he was the fandom bicycle for that show (well him and Tsuna).
I don't remember my first OTP though mostly cuz I didn't really get into shipping until I started watching anime.
Currently OTP is obviously Zoscar <3
Thanks Ollie!
#ollieofthebeholder#rqg#zoscar#KHR#god I miss using numbers for ships that was so fun#code geass /derogatory#yami answers
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šŖš§æ for the fic ask game? -outerbankies š
šŖwhat is your post-writing/sharing aftercare? How do you take care of yourself or celebrate yourself when you've finished a fic?
oooh, i don't know that i have one thing. when i finished made up the other week, i did a little post-fic reflecting and i thought that was really effective in working through the energy and like particulate matter that remains once a fic is finished. in the past (old fandom) i might have posted an ask meme or something like that, but i had a pretty close-knit corner in that fandom where we prompted each other to talk about our stuff fairly regularly or just went yelling excitedly into someone's inbox or dms; it's a lot more excruciating for me now.
š§æwhat steps do you take to not take things personally if a fic doesn't do well, or if your writing/posting/sharing experience isn't going how you'd like it to?
the last fic i wrote before i branched into hockey rpf was a niall horan/channing tatum 25k fic with an intended audience of exactly two people; it has like 7 kudos to this day lol. writing is hard work and i obviously want people to read my stuff and like it if they do, but if i'm getting too anxious about a fic i make sure i center on: 'am i writing something i enjoy/want to write' and 'am i writing it in the way i want' and if the answer to those two questions is YES then i have met my needs. everything else is just the dusting of powdered sugar on the french toast, you know? except i hate french toast so pretend i used another analogy. if the answer is NO then i evaluate if i want to keep going or not. a few years ago i signed up for a sidgeno exchange and i absolutely did not enjoy writing that fic (although i'm fine with how it turned out) and don't want to have that experience again.
#replies#outerbankies#thanks!!!#sorry i got a little long-winded there#I think for the second one my point is: i do try to approach writing as something for me that sometimes other people also enjoy#itās hard to keep that attitude up all the time but itās so much healthier for me that way!!#hockey rpf#what is writing?#i donāt know her
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Writers Wrapped 2022
1. How many words have you written this year: 173,701!
2. How many works did you publish this year?: 23!
3. What work are you most proud of?: I think it has to be Unbroken - I had to get over a lot of insecurities in order to start posting it. I've been exploring a lot of difficult themes through this fic and, thus far, feel satisfied with how I've addressed them. I am also excited about how the plot has come along so far. I look forward to finishing it in 2023.
4. Favourite title you used: The fic title and chapter titles in TĆŖte-Ć -TĆŖte and Playing with Fire were the ones I had the most fun brainstorming!
5. If you use song lyrics, which artistās songs did you pull from the most?: Oof. I don't think I directly pulled any song lyrics this year but I definitely had a ton of playlist inspirations.
6. Pairing you wrote the most for this year?: Janeway/Chakotay
7. favourite pairing you wrote for this year?: I do have to say Janeway/Chakotay because they continue to have my heart and soul. But I had the most fun writing the Janeway/Tuvok/Chakotay dynamic in Playing with Fire
8. What work was the quickest to write?: I'll be Your First if You'll be my Last, which was written/reviewed/posted in like 8 hours. (Thank you monthly Write-a-thon)
9. What work took you the longest to write?: I have agonized and nitpicked and annoyed my betas about like every paragraph of Unbroken - both the chapters already posted and the ones queued up.
10. How many wips do you have in your docs for next year?: Ahhhm errrr ah blerg... SMH3, AQ2, Unbroken, Lesson Plans, Threshold add on, Tuvix add on... er.
Basically, too many to count and a few that will come to me later š
11. Whatās your longest work of the year?: Parent Trap clocked in at 76,082 words. Not as many as my all time favorite Eden's Deception's 90,990 from last year, but still quite proud of it.
12. Whatās your shortest work of the year?: Gloves at a whopping 381
13. What wip are you taking into next year with you?: The WIPs following me into 2023 are Unbroken, TĆŖte-Ć -TĆŖte, Sailor Delta, Out of Reach, and Age of Aquarius 2
14. Whatās your most common genre and/or trope?: Making my favs suffer šš
15. Your favorite character to write this year?: Absolutely Tuvok and Seven. They are really facinating characters to try to capture in dialogue and POV.
16. The character that gave you the most trouble writing this year?: Kes - unfortunately I just haven't got a firm grasp on her character.
17. Whatās one pairing you want to explore next year?: I had a lot of fun with Poly Tuvok and KJ in October and I think i'd really enjoy doing more with them next year. I also keep coming back to the idea of dumping Mark Johnson onto Voyager and seeing how that would affect he and KJs relationship.
18. What's a fandom you want to explore next year?: Star Trek Prodigy and Strange New Worlds are two treks I'd love to dive deeper into. But I also have a few original projects That I think I want to devote more attention to.
19. Which work of yours have you reread the most?: I think this year, I've re-read Eden's Deception the most of any fic I have ever written. It really hasnt sustained engagement like I had hoped, so I'm unsure how much I should prioritize the rest of the series... But I have never been so satisfied by a thing I wrote. I continue to think it's the best thing I've ever written and still can't wait to continue that fic universe.
20. Did you do any collaborative works this year? (tell us which!): I have had a truly fantastic time playing in @voyagerihardlyknowher 's threshold AU sand box. it is so unique and charming and delightful and I have met some wonderful friends through that universe. š„°
21. Did you write any gifts this year? (tell us which!): I gifted 4 Thresholdy fics to the Threshold AU peeps, 3 kinktober works to my favorite smut loving queens, Post-Prodigy and Post-Beyerverse oneshots for @gijane-7702, and 2 punishment oneshots to my Evil Writers Chat Sailor Moon Fandom buddies.
22. Did you receive any gifts this year? (tell us which!): A) SkyKingHaruka gifted me his Evil Writers Chat punishment, Dreams (which was intended to be a oneshot but evolved into something infinitely more delightful). B) @theredheadedcaptain gifted me and Erestorandfin Chimera, which had an very fun surprise twist at the end. (I also love how Red does J/C). C) @trekflower gifted me He's Got the Lobes - a bit of crack humor that still has me in stitches. D) and @jellybeansarecool gifted me Welcome Home - a threshold AU from Beyerverse that was adorable and heartwarming and I still melt when I reread it.
23. What do you listen to while writing?: A very random assortment of music. I have playlists for Unbroken, Threshold AU stories, Age of Aquarius, and I also have random songs that I'll play on repeat for certain types of scenes where the rythm or tone of the song helps me put the right words and pacing into place.
24. Favourite work you wrote this year?: Playing with Fire, which evolved from a kinktober prompt that got out of control. I had a spectacular amount of fun researching and writing it.
25. Favourite line/passage you wrote this year?: This is from a chapter of Unbroken that isn't published yet. I am really proud of the cadence and the simile: "The pain consuming her came on like a storm rolling over the plains. At times it was sudden and violent, ripping through her whole being, at other times ceasing suddenly, leaving all too brief relief in its wake. In the calm, with thunder rumbling above her, the anxiety about what came next built and built, like the tension before a lightning strike"
26. Biggest surprise while writing this year?: The community I've been lucky to gain through @theredheadedcaptain and I's writing group and the joy I have shared with everyone involved in @voyagerihardlyknowher 's Threshold AU have been the 2 best things to come out of this year of writing for me.
#elephantwrites#@ the writing center <3#threshold au#to friends new and old#star trek voyager fandom#sailor moon fandom#on writing#writing#star trek voyager fanfiction#star trek prodigy fanfiction#sailor moon fanfiction
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FUTURE PLANS
I need to clarify some things for those who read my works and want to seek more and see that I write for multiple fandoms and/or havenāt published the next part of a multi-chapter fanfiction.
ā I am still making part 2s to most of my stand alone fanfictions
ā I havenāt quit any of the stories Iāve written except for Ms. Bucciarati (Iām still sorry about that š) Escapism still exists, The Bride of Dio still exists and i hate you still exists.
I am just so low-energy and easily burnt out so my output is slow. Itās always been like that for me. The only reason I was able to consistently release The Bride of Dio every few days was bc I had the chapters done for months. I began writing TBOD in October of 2022.
To my Valorant fans, there are so many of you guys š« and I understand why. The game has such hot ppl in it and thereās a severeā¦SEVERE lack of fanfiction compared to the popularity of the game. Plus the game lacks so much lore that if you want to enjoy any of the characters you NEED fanfiction. Iāll open up my requests again soon for those who really want me to write something!
Ny birthday is June 30 so late June there wonāt be anything published but the next thing that comes out will be the next chapter of TBOD. I donāt wanna end up abandoning this story bc I care about my version of Dio a lot and want to fully tell the story!
Thank you for being with me! ššŖš¾
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