I’m so sick of seeing videos and posts of a bunch of privileged college students who decided to make a geopolitical conflict their whole personality and who view college as a LARPing opportunity instead of fucking school. You just know they wouldn’t be screaming about this if they had any actual hobbies or any ideology besides what’s popular online and what pisses off their parents. It’s all about a radikewl aesthetic while affecting absolutely nothing in the real world. And now with Columbia University’s rabbi urging Jewish students to stay away from campus because it’s unsafe, what the fuck have these LARPers done other than harass Jews off campus instead of going to class in their “Gaza solidarity encampment” (AKA their excuse to skip class and not do assignments)? People in Gaza are still hungry and displaced, Hamas still has hostages, but don’t worry, guys! Students at Columbia are being antisemitic by praising 10/7 and cosplaying anarchy instead of going to class “for Palestine”!

They’re just insufferable, and their First Amendment rights don’t exempt them from the rest of us judging them for their actions

Feliks as a streamer except he plays Minecraft and at least a third of it is him screaming

At this point I really should learn ladino because I basically pronounce Hebrew in the same accent I speak Spanish

Come on!

I’m just going to leave this here…

Other notes of insanity from the "JVP Haggadah":

Adonai elohenu melekh ha-olam is translated differently literally every time it appears. First it's "spirit of freedom" then it becomes "the source" and "the eternal determiner of the universe" and "the one who sustains all life". Y'all. It's the same phrase in every blessing. Jews would know this. Pick one translation and stick with it!

Wine is typically a symbol of joy in the Seder-- it's often a joy for our liberation from Egypt. However, I've also seen it represented as joy despite the hardships and captivity many of us still face. JVP does away with all of that and dedicates each glass of wine to a different theme: Education, solidarity, boycotting Israel, and community. Wine is a symbol of joy in Judaism because drinking four glasses of Maneshewitz in a night gets you drunk. The symbolism is inherent to the wine itself. I don't see how getting shitfaced helps you boycott Israel.

Yachatz is fully gutted. The Hagaddah is supposed to detail how and why you break the matzah-- you can't just break it! There's symbolism and meaning to breaking specific pieces and creating an Afikomen. JVP says fuck an Afikomen, everybody just breaks a cracker and thinks about systematic oppression. They try to (incorrectly) address the Afikomen issue later, but it's nonsensical at that point because we never made one to begin with.

There is no Maggid. There's a section called Maggid, which includes a single verse from what I'm almost certain is the Christian Old Testament, not the Torah. There's no story. It literally just goes Bible Verse > Shitting on Israel > Four Questions > Plagues. They literally took out the longest and most important part of the Seder. I'm not shocked that they couldn't figure out a way to make the story of Exodus seem anti-Zionist, but still...

There's no Chad Gadya. Instead, you're supposed to go around the table, wish each other good night, and ask what they learned. This might actually be an interesting way to further involve attendees in the Seder if there were... you know... a Maggid. There's nothing to take away from this because there's zero substance. The story wasn't told. It's just there to force attendees to verbally shit on Israel before they're allowed to leave.

I'm sure there are other major issues with it; feel free to add them if you find any. I'm just personally still too baffled by the stupidity of it all to go through it a second time.

reblog for sample size !!

Word of advice for all JVP cosplayers. If you do a single Google search for a seder plate you can easily find many of them that literally have everything labeled for your copying convenience

See my seder plate ↓

This shit is so hilarious I had to reactivate this blog just to share it:

Enjoy that תסורח with your הצמ dumbasses.

I was thinking earlier how manischewitz sells everything so I went to look and see what exactly they sell but forgot that it's pesach so they don't even list anything that isn't kosher for passover.

Every Jew I know, and a lot of Jews I don't know, have repeatedly said that JVP represents Jews about as much as Autism Speaks represents autistic people, so you'd think there wouldn't be as many gentiles saying "look, this demonstration where people chanted explicitly Jew-hating slogans can't possibly be antisemitic! JVP was there!" and yet

One of those small Jewish moments is realising someone else is probably Jewish when they also donate $18 $36 $54 etc for fundraisers or whatnot

happy flattest flat fuck friday of the year to all who celebrate

It should be illegal to put finals and move out at the same time

Mój posiłek, barszcz czerwony i maca ale mieszkam w Ameryce so AMERICAN PAPER PLATES xddddddd!

Please reblog for a greater sample size if you’re interested in the results!

Edit: While comments and commentary is much appreciated, please don’t give away whether a particular answer is correct or incorrect until after the poll!

Edit 2: Seriously please stop saying which answer you think it is when you reblog! It influences the results if people see.

Canon and 2p version of the Eastern Slavs of Hetalia