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markzpov · 2 months

Note

can u pls write about a blowjob with innocent/virgin hao? 😭🩷

friend’s comfort — zhanghao (m)

﹒˚ ₊ ︵﹒⊹ ๑ ︵︵ ๑ ⊹﹒︵﹒˚ ₊ ︵﹒⊹ ๑ ︵︵ ๑ ⊹﹒︵

pairing : zhanghao x afab!reader rating : explicit , mdni

a/n : tysm for this request ! this was something new for me i hope you enjoyed it because i enjoyed writing it. i will try improving in the future 💗

﹒˚ ₊ ︵﹒⊹ ๑ ︵︵ ๑ ⊹﹒︵﹒˚ ₊ ︵﹒⊹ ๑ ︵︵ ๑ ⊹﹒︵

It’s your final week of university you have been waiting for this day for so long all those breakdowns all those all nighters were finally going to be worth it

You were ready to spend the time with your best friend zhanghao, you guys have been friends since the start of the university year.

You have went through thick and thin together although you didn’t have a very long friendship compared to some of the people in your university it was still very special to both you.

Something you didn’t know tho was that zhanghao had a growing feeling whenever you guys were together

Whether it was a simple friendly hangout or a university party his heart start beating uncontrollably around you.

Something about you brought this side out of him he didn’t know what it was which is why he’s kept it to himself this whole time.

So here you are sitting on his bedroom floor waiting for him to pay attention to you, unlike you zhanghao hasn’t finished his final assignment which is what he’s been stressing about for the past two hours

“come on you need a break!” you whined for the nth time in the past 30 minutes to which the younger boy just rolled his eyes at you

“do you want me to fail?” he said followed by a short sigh eyes still very focused on his assignment

“i’ve literally been here for hours and we haven’t even done anything” you whined slightly at the younger boy but gave up seeing you didn’t get any response

“whatever” you responded before getting up and going to his closet to change in to something more comfortable.

It’s normal for you guys to have clothes at each other places just in case of emergencies

So you quickly picked out some basketball shorts and a black tank top and swiftly put your hair in a ponytail.

Then taking a seat on his bed, continuously staring at the back of his head hoping he would notice and turn around

.. thankfully he did

“okay i’m coming just-“ before he would finish his words he stared at the older female that was now staring into his eyes

He felt blood rushing up to his face making his face turn red and flustered

But there was another unusual feeling he had he felt blood rushing down to his legs especially to his dick which caused it to slowly raise prominently

Your eyes widened at zhanghao’s little friend’s sudden interest in you, with that you started to scan his eyes for a sign of approval clearing your throat before speaking out

“uhm zhanghao do you want to sort that out?” you slightly hinted at the problem that started to arise in your friend’s pants,

However the younger boy didn’t respond but instead looked down in embarrassment

The truth is zhanghao has never taken part in any sexual activities not even masterbating making the poor boy clueless when it came to things like this

“i- i just..” he struggled to get out a full sentence not only from embarrassment

But from all the pressure in his pants not making him think properly no matter how this situation may be new to both of you, you nodded at him reassuring him that everything is fine

“i’ve never done anything so i don’t know what to do” he said with his blush spreading across his face making it more apparent.

This shocked you as you would’ve thought that zhanghao was experienced due to all the girls that he had swooning over him in your university

“i’ll help you okay?” you offered, making zhanghao’s eyes brighten up

“you don’t have to you know ..” he spoke up slightly turning back to his laptop

Making you get up from the bed and walk yourself over to the brunette male before turning his head to meet your eyes

“let mummy make you feel good okay?” you softly whispered to him

You didn’t know where this confidence came from but you’ve crushed on him for the longest time this was finally your time to shoot your shot so you took this opportunity with both hands

Making him nod your way in an obedient manner

This flipped a switch in you, seeing him so vulnerable and fragile under your touch made your wet patch expand more than it already has

You fully turned his chair to face you, then finally getting on your knees infront of the clueless but sexually frustrated boy

You started to rub him over his once perfect looking jeans which are now ruined by the wet stain near his crotch, he started whining softly biting on to his lip eyes shut tight

“do that feel good baby?” you asked the younger boy to which he struggled to respond as he was lost in the ecstasy, so you quickly pulled away from him

Making the younger boy whine due to the lack of contact

“why did you stop!” he raises his voice slightly due to the pent of sexual frustration

“if you want me to continue you need to use your words okay?” you slightly leaned in and whispered in his ear which earned you a nod from the innocent boy

Now that you got that across, you went back to pleasing him

You started to slowly unzip his pants bringing them down to his ankles before getting to work

You then started by running his hands up and down this dick which got this poor virgin male whining so hard

For being a very inexperienced guy his dick was very lengthy but very pretty and taken care of

After warming up his dick, you wrapped your mouth around it and used your hands to cover the space that you had left

“mummy please don’t stop” he said in an attempted to talk but letting it out in a small whiny voice

You started swirling him in your mouth, tongue moving in circular movements teasing his tip slightly, saliva dripping down and covering his dick you were eating him like he was the last meal on earth

“faster ! please don’t stop” he moaned with his head kicked back making you swirl around his length before removing her mouth and spitting on his dick to add more moisture

“don’t worry i wasn’t planning to” you replied with a small smirk painted on your face

Getting right back it bopping her head up and down

“fuck— oh my god! it feels so— fucking good— please ahh~” he started blabbering which indicated to you that he was near making you pull your mouth off and pumping him with your two hands

“fuck— fuckkk— ahh— !” he said letting out a small scream following his moans you opened your mouth which made all his sweet juices land in your mouth

You quickly swallow it then helped you to put his boxers and pants back on

You both sat there in silence, not knowing how to come back from this

“listen zhanghao ive liked you for the longest time .. i don’t want things to be awkward if you don’t feel the same but i just—!” you were quickly interrupted by the younger giving you a huge hug

“are you dumb? i’ve liked you for so long that’s why i got this problem in the first place i just didn’t know how to deal with it” he responded back settling his head in the crook of her neck

To which she giggled softly at before patting his head slowly

“finally, zhanghao do you want to be my boyfriend?” the older female asked the boy, to which he rolled his eyes slightly

“obviously like?” he answered back with a small hint of sassiness

“better fix that attitude before you go a week without head” she giggled slightly at him whilst walking to the bed before getting an earful of a whiny zhanghao

And that final assignment let’s just say it didn’t really matter for his over grade.

#zb1 zhang hao #zb1 reactions #zb1 scenarios #zb1 smut #zb1 matthew #zb1 hanbin #zb1 x reader #zb1 imagines #zb1 #zb1 taerae #zb1 jiwoong #kpop #kpop smut #smut

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cherry1sblog · 11 months

Text

PAIRING:Lee heeseung x fem!reader

GENRES:smut,fluff,bullying,alcohol,party,unprotected sex (rember to wrap your Willy so the out come won’t be silly🌝)

WARNINGS there is bullying in this heeseung is basically a dick to y/n and nothing in this story is real!!! This is fan fiction and the way I write about heeseung is not the way I portray him as he’s a person himself this is simply for entertainment only !!

SUMMARY:heeseung had always bullied you through your 3 years of Highschool but never let anyone touch you other then him and if he found out someone did that was the end of it you were basically marked as his toy that’s until the summer of your junior year you had enough you were done with him always making fun of you and you hated the fact that after all he did I to you you still adored him and liked him but it dosent matter cause you wanted to leave your senior year with a banger so you were no longer your nerdy self still smart asf obvi but appearance wise different you got contacts new clothes thank god you guys didn’t have a dress code and most importantly you spent all summer learning how to do your makeup……

(Word count :………)

//FIRST DAY OF SENIOR YEAR\\

You woke up that day at 4 in the morning all tho school didn’t start till 7:40 you had 3 hours to get ready for you first last day of senior year you showers blow dried your hair styled it put in your contacts and lastly did you makeup you were ready to go feeling a bit scared slightly pulling your skirt up more revealing more of your thighs but you didn’t care you were going to do this no matter what and no one can stop you not even Lee heeseung

Walking into school heads turning new faces old faces appearing but everyone seemed to stair at you looking some took out there phones and took photos asking if they knew who you were that upset you a little you went to this school for 3 years and people only saw yourself really only when you became “pretty” but still u were now super nervous now but your rember your main target Lee heeseung you clutched your purse and went straight to your classroom people Turing around seeing who entered you sat in a random seat next to a girl you’ve never seen she seemed super bubbly she was quiet a talker to “hello!!”you were shocked by her sudden loudness “oh…sorry…that must’ve been to loud “she lowers her voice you giggled “it’s okay why do you seem so excited tho”she turend to you with a big smile “well it’s my last year of Highschool and I get to meet new people so I’m really exited I Gusse “you just nodded an okay “oh I’m chu btw!” Ofc a cute girl with a cute name made sense “I’m y/n” you smiled at her “I’m guessing that this isn’t your first year “”nope I’ve gon sense freshman year here so I can tell you a lot about here if u want “she smiled brightly and hugged you you’ve never had a freind before so this was all knew “tysm!! Oh sorry is hugging now your thing”she looked at you but you didn’t know if the only freind you were sorta making would leave you if she found out but you trusted her “ah sorry I’m just not really used to having freinds or talking to people “she looked at you confused “your littlest drop dead gorgeous and no one can take there eyes off you” you giggled awkwardly “okay I’ll tell you I a secret up until my junior year I was a big nerd and I wanted a change so here’s the knew and improved me “you smiled happily until ofc someone had to walk in and ruin your fun lee heeseung

Your smile went down and chu noticed “what’s wrong y/n”he heard her say your name and wiped his head that way looking confused cause he didn’t notice you until chu said your name again “y/nnn can you hear me are you okay “ you let out a little cough rember not to break “yeah I’m okay sorry “and just as you were minding your busses heeseung came up to you “wow I really can believe it they park y/n dosent look like a nerd anymore “u just rolled your eyes at him “what do you want lee I’m not playing games with you anymore “he came close to your ear “just cause you changed dosent mean you aren’t my toy still isn’t that right doll”you didn’t know what to say he always caught your tongue “now go get me some snacks from the lunch room I’m hungry “he put 20 dollars on the desk expecting you to pick it up and run over there like always “no”you looked up at him and stood up took the money and threw it at him chu also seemingly upset “you know what heeseung if you want a stupid snack go get it your damn self “he seemed shocked a your response but started to smirk “right I’m sorry I wouldn’t want you running in that skirt you might wanna pull it down “chu getting ready to defend you but you didn’t need her to cause this is what you prepared for all summer “no I think it’s fine actually it’s ment to be like this but if you done being a dick you can go “everyone in the class stunned now not at the fact that you just told off they lee heeseung but at the fact that your the girl who used to do everyone’s homework that you were heeseung toy but just cause your not a nerd anymore dosent mean your not still off limits

//lunch time\\

By lunch time you already had 9 boys come to ask you for your insta and 12 girls ask what different makeup products you use or what you skin care was but those were the good things there were people saying you had gotten plastic surgery you did certain things just to get the money for your stuff people even said there was no way you were lee heeseungs little toy and if you wondering why they call you Lee heeseungs toy it’s cause he could pick at every part of you body and you did what he wanted he could slap you pull your hair push you and you still always did what he wanted you to do but he had made it every clear that you were only his to fuck with and no one eleses

You had saten down with chu to eat lunch her happily taking a bite of food made you happy you finally had a friend well let’s say a couple freinds you had met this boy really shy but nice named soobin and another boy who was more outgoing beomgyu they were also new and just transferred so your guises group was prefect but anyways you all were sitting down and enjoyed your food you were happy for once out of your Highschool life you finally had people you could go to the mall with have sleepovers go to party’s with but ofc like always you were knocked out of you thoughts by yet again heeseung he had just pushed a kid to the floor for getting him the wrong dumplings him jake and sunghoon walking away from the boy they had just scared heeseung walked passed you but Sunghoon said something and walked back to where you were “hey y/n” you looked up seeing as Sunghoon and Jake never really participated in heeseungs stupidness but they did have there fare share of “fun “with it “hey sunghoon”you said coldly”huh “he stuck his tongue threw his cheek “it really is you then HOWD you get so much hotter over summer I mean you were a cute girl but now your really js something eles “as he was about to start going closer heeseung pushed him away not to hard but just enough to make him stumble “what the hell do you think your doing “ “not like your ever gonna do anything plus she wouldn’t dare you even if you wanted we all know she’s your toy but she can speak for herself “ you saw heeseung clenching his fist but it made you angry how he thought he could control you “I told you everyone knows y/n is off limits “ “off limits to bully I’m not bullying her I’m simpling asking if she wants to go out sometime “ as heeseung was about to open his mouth you answerd “y-yes “they both looked stunned beomgyu soobin and chu having there mouths open wide “I would like to go out with you sometime “ “doll chose very wisely here “ “you don’t get to control me heeseung I’m done with your bull shit you can’t just walk all over me agian “ heeseung Just loooked at you with an expression you couldn’t understand “you heard her anyways y/n uh I’ll pick you up Saturday and 4:30 “you nodded your head smiling heesung had stormed off at that point.

//the next day\\

“Y/NN THERE YOU ARE “chu comes rushing to you sitting pulling out the chair and sitting in it she seemed to exited “yk chu sometimes I wonder if you on something “she just laughs “we’re not talking about that rn LOOK THO” she hands you her phone and it was a party ofc the boys were having as a welcome back to school like they did every year but you had never gone but this year you were definitely going no matter what even if you had to sneak out “holy shit the back to school party “”yeah it’s gonna be at jakes house tonight so we better go shopping after school “you both looked at eachother cause obviously you guys had no idea what to wear to a back to school party

//at the mall\\

“Ughhhhh y/n we’ve been to three dress shops already and you’ve liked non of them “she said dragging her feet with bags in her hands “look chu my dress it has to be different then something I would normally wear if I was the old me remember we’re gonna go out with a banger and If I were you I would go return the dress cause this dress shop is they best”as soon as you guys step into the dress shop chus mouth drops and gose to pick up a dress “Y/N YOU WERE SO RIGHT OMG “ you start to look for dresses to seeing witch one you like it came down to three dresses a white one simple and short but cute a blue one the had sparkles and a slimy black one with a diamond straps as soon as you came out in the blue one chu loved it it fit your body perfectly glitter on is and everything you would be shining with the lights they would have and you knew this was gonna be the one you got some simple black heels to for the dress witch you loved as you guys were leaving the store ofc you had to see heeseung and 6 of his guy freinds you were fucked “yooo hold up “Jake stops you and everyone is looking at you and chu”see what I tell you heeseung it was her and uh what’s your name”he looks at chu confused “o-oh I’m chu”he looked at her up and down “cute” your a bit nervous cause everyone still had there eyes on you normally you would just hide away but no you weren’t going to go down “my god can you fucking pervs look at something eles “heeseung grabed your had and took you into a hallway where others weren’t at “h-HEY let go of me “he released your arm and put u up agains the wall making you a bit flustered “doll see your starting to piss me off just cause you where this stupid shit only makes you look like a slut and you going out with Sunghoon lemme just tell you this if you wake up the next day and he’s gone don’t ever expect to hear from him again and this big mouth of yours needs to learn how to shut the fuck up “he let you go as you feel to the floor being in this position triggered something and you remembered

-flash back-

The three girls you were so afraid of had gotten done beating you leaving you on the rooftop heeseung had come out of the corner he was watching everything happen in coming up to you you looked up at him and your eyes got watery he grabed your face and looked at you “don’t cry it only makes you look pathetic”and he let go of your face and walked away later that day you found a bandage on you desk but didn’t know who put it there

-end of flash back-

“OMG Y/n”chu ran up to you finding you on the floor holding your chest “are you okay what happend did he hurt you are you crying “”I’m im fine chu ty “she helped you up and you guys left the mall you didn’t have time to cry and be sad you were going to this party no matter what like you said

//arriving at party\\

Soobin had picked you guys up all four of you guys going to the party as u guys got off people do what they do gossiping like there’s no tmrw anyways you walk thru the door being greeted by Sunoo even tho he was friends with the boys he wasn’t a complete jack ass “omg so glad you guys could make it” hugging u and chu and giving the boys a side hug “well um if u guys want drinks there in the kitchen and yeah pretty much just enjoy but go greet the boys if u want “ u guys nodded beomgyu chu and soobin going to say hi to there friends as you went alone to go get a drink “hey you guys want a drink “they all nodded saying a beer was good u walked into the kitchen seeing people make out drinking laughing and partying as this was your first party you didn’t imagine it to be exactly like the tv Highschool shows but hey you couldn’t complain walking up to the alcohol section seeing jay and sunghoon he waved at you as u came up to him “damn y/n you look amazing “Sunghoon said “thank you I didn’t exactly know if this was a good fit but now that I know you like it I’m guessing it was “sunghoon and jay scanning you from top to bottom “so uh y/n you want a drink “jay had asked “yeah just give me four beers “he nodded sunghoon pulling you by your waist and bending down to your ear a little “hey I just wanted to make sure you were okay yk after what happened”you felt an Aw because he actually cared you wispers back into his ear “yeah I’m fine I wasn’t gonne let him get to me “he smirked looking at you and gave u a kiss witch you were not prepared for but ofc someone was watching you the entire time and pushed him off you “what the fuck sunghoon”you could tell heeseung was mad but why what reasons did he have to be upset “oh hey heeseung”sunghoon smirked at him like as if he knew he wasn’t supposed to be doing what he just did “don’t fucking hey heeseung me what the fuck do you think your doing “ “I mean I thought it was pretty clear I was kissing her “hey you guys cmon don’t fight “jay stood beetween the boys “yeah cmon heeseung don’t sweat it we’re just having some fun “ those words hurt you you thought sunghoon liked you or were you really just there for his entertainment now?

You put your head down a bit upset and you saw heeseung smirking “what’s wrong doll I told you aren’t I right “ you were annoyed at heeseung at the fact he was right again but you felt embarrassed “shut the fuck up heeseung “ “dont be mad doll you guys were just having fun right “ in that moment it clicked to sunghoon the way he had said it and he felt bad “wait y/n that’s not how I mean it” u we’re gonna take this as your opportunity to get back at heeseung “you smiled at Sunghoon going up to him whispering in his ear leaving heeseung and jay curious “don’t worry I know we’re having fun but heeseung just ruined it so can you take me where we can have fun” you left sunghoon speechless the girl who always had to run errands for his bsf and who would always get picked on was now so bold and a bit flustered “u-uh yeah sure “ he grabed your arm guiding you to what you assumed was jakes guest room but as you looked back you could see a very annoyed heeseung

//15 min after entering the room\\

As you and sunghoon were making out his shirt already off and your dress guliding up to your hips sunghoon s hands placed on your thighs massaging them you were nervous but just as he was about to go under you stopped him “hoon wait um it’s my first time so I’m kinda scared”he just smiled at you “hey we don’t have to do it if you don’t want we can take things slow” maybe heeseung was wrong maybe he really did like you and you were gonna shove it in his face that you and his bsf were gonna be together “well do u js wanna watch a movie and cuddle” by this time you were ready to sleep so u agreed “yeah but um do you know if Jake has any clothes to borrow or I could js sleep in this I don’t wanna bother” he got you and went to a drawer in the room “scince we stay at jakes a lot we basically all have are own room heres my shirt “ he throws you a plain white tee but no pants so you look confused at him a bit “oh did you want like shorts or somthing sorry” he was about to go back but you stopped him “no like this is fine I actually prefer to sleep like this “ he just nodded and he went to change into something more comfortable but you didn’t expect him to come back with no shirt so you gasped seeing his pretty toned body “what?” He asks you just blush and shake your head as he smirks the rest of the night was fun but you fell asleep that night not thinking anything of it

//the next morning \\

Your eyes fluttered as you heard a knock on the door and seeing Jake come in the room made you panic and in that moment you wanted to die sunghoon still sleep until “YO WHAT THE FUCK SUNGHOON” and in that moment sunghoon woke up “nah dude I feel so betrayed you promised to help me clean but instead you got to fuck y/n “ and cause ofc everyone had heard jake yell Niki sunoo and heeseung came to the room and your eyes met heeseungs and you could see clearly he was upset “ Jake we didn’t fuck she just slept over “ “yk that’s hard to BELIEVE when she’s wearing your shirt and you have no shirt “ Jake had a point but it was the truth you guys really had not done anything “actually it wouldn’t be hard to believe sense y/n s a slut” you got up from the bed and threw the pillow at heeseung “you know heeseung just cause your a fucking whore dosent mean I am and I just borrowed his clothes you idiot so fuck off “ scince you had no shorts and just a shirt the boys just looked at you niki and sunoo deciding it was better to leave but heeseung was about to say something but sunghoon had cut him off “ hyung can you please just let this go “ and with that sunghoon just closed the door on them and locked it and in that moment you both realized you had school “ughhh we have school “ “we can always skip “ you quickly refused never once missing a day not wanting to hurt your perfect attendance “ cmon y/n don’t be such a nerd or are you still the old y/n?” You knew he was only saying that to persuade you but it did work “ I mean n-no I just um wouldn’t know what we would do “ sunghoon just shook his head at you “ we could just chill go to the mall do anything are you really that boring ?” Offended at his hitting him on his bicep “let’s just chill then “

//after schoo\\

After school normally the boys would all go to jakes house tk study play games shit like that witch they all did thinking that y/n would be gone by then but they were very wrong when they see y/n and sunghoon on the couch asleep “holy shit heeseung hyung is not gonna be happy” jungwon picked you up and ran with you on his back you being confused when jungwon locked his door and threw you on the bed “WHAT TH-“ jungwon covers your mouth muffling your yelling until you stoped “shut the fuck up unless you want to make heeseung hyung and sunghoon hyung hate eachother more right now “ honestly you couldn’t give a fuck less and if this made heeseung miserable then you had every reason not to care “ why should I care on fact I actually don’t mind going back ou-“ jungwon grabed your hand pinning you on the wall wtf is it with everyone pinning you on the wall “ look I know heeseung hyung did fucked up shit and I know it’s fucked up we didn’t do anything but we all grow from our mistakes and plus now your like hot so please just shut the fuck up and well stay in here”.

———————————————————————————-

Okay well I’m im just gonna leave this here I feel like I had y’all eating for too long I honestly thought I would be done with this by now but I went on a family vacation recently so I had no time but I’ll try to make the next part as quick as possible ty all sm for being patient

#enhypen #enhypen smut #fanfic #jungwon #cherry1sblogs #kpop smut #jake sim #sunghoon #sunghoon smut #heeseung smut #sunoo #jay park

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sabo-has-my-heart · 3 months

Note

Hi! I don’t really know if this is considered an emergency request so feel free to ignore this since it’s way less urgent compared to other emergency requests.

Recently I have been having problems with asking myself whether or not I deserve an apology whenever I feel offended by my friends. I don’t really know how to word it so I’ll try my best here. I’m that ‘therapist friend’ in my group of friends of 4 (including me) and I always help solve the fights between our group which is mostly the same 2 friends fighting. I’ve never been in a fight with them more than 3 times and those times it barely lasts a day. Out of the 3 of my friends I’m really close to 1 of them (I’ll call her Kay) kay and I often play games together like Minecraft, cod, fall guys, etc. while playing these games she couldn’t talk so i was the only one talking while she was texting me back her responses, at one point she said something along the lines of ‘Jesus you sound like those annoying little kids that spit out a bunch of questions.’ Or something like that. I’ve been very insecure about my own voice and my child-like personality and the doubt in my head that I annoy my friends with my blabbering mouth(my friends don’t know this tho) I just responded with ‘oh’ and stayed quiet for the rest of the call which was silent. I excused myself and just went offline to think. I’m not sure if I was being over dramatic over something so small but that really hurt me and I tried to make it obvious it did hoping she’d approach me about it and tell me she didn’t mean it or basically anything but she never did. She just went about it like it didn’t even happen and I’m too scared to bring it up since it happened already a while ago and it’d be weird to. And this happens sometimes too, it doesn’t happen often nor does it rarely. I just need a second opinion on how to go about this. Could you give me some advice abt this along with sanji and law reacting to their s/o with this kind of problem?

I’m also the same Anon who sent the emergency request abt wanting to die instead of experiencing a loss of someone close, That really helped me overcome that feeling! I haven’t fully but I’m improving! Thank you so much and I hope you have an amazing day! (So sorry if this whole request is confusing and sorry for all the grammar mistakes)

I’m sorry if this isn’t considered an emergency request so feel free to ignore!

Hi sweet heart! I'm glad you're doing better about wanting to die. don't worry about being fully better. You're getting better, that's all that matters. It's okay to take your time. I'm sorry you're going through this. I sort of know how this feels, I was kind of this person in my group. Unfortunately, I eventually realized that, to those people, I wasn't a friend. Not really, anyway. I was just, admittedly, too afraid of being alone and abandoned to leave them. I suppose that's a pretty common fear. People don't really want to be alone.

Warnings: GN!Reader (I hope, let me know if I made any mistakes on that),

Word Count: 1800

Chewing on your lip, you stared out the window. You deserved an apology for this, didn’t you? After all, it was rude, mean, and hurtful, so it wasn’t like it was an unreasonable request, right? The two of you in particular were pretty close too, so she’d know that she should apologize, right? Even still, you couldn’t help but wonder if you really deserved an apology. Surely you deserved it, you were always solving fights between them and rarely started any arguments yourself, so it wasn’t like you were constantly causing needless drama. It was one apology. If it were any of your other friends, you’d talk to both of them, try to smooth things over, and usually they’d work things out and apologize on their own after that. So being on the receiving end of that meant that you deserved the same courtesy… right? Still, you couldn’t help but wonder if you really did deserve one. What if you were being over dramatic? Or perhaps you were blowing all of this out of proportion. She and the others would be pretty upset if you asked for an apology you didn’t deserve and you really didn’t want to cause a fight. Maybe it would be fine if you waved it off? It’s not like it was a particularly common thing. Yeah, it happened from time to time, but it wasn’t like they were constantly putting you down.

Getting up, you ran a hand through your hair. Maybe a shower or bath would calm you down and help you think. The warm water might help you relax and think clearly and a lot of people did their best thinking in the bathroom. If nothing else, it was worth a shot. Stepping in, you let the warm water soothe you, let it ease the tension in your muscles. Granted, it was hard to get yourself to relax into the water when you were this wound up, but eventually the warmth worked its way into your body, calming your mind. You were always the one solving all the problems, the one the others went to when they needed to talk, the one who helped everyone else, so what were you supposed to do when you were the one who needed help? Needed someone to talk to? Would the others hear you out? Just because you weren’t as close to the others didn’t mean you couldn’t talk to them about this. At least… hopefully. Despite how the water eased your body and calmed your mind, your thoughts still swirled like a whirlwind. You lost track of how much time you spent in the bathroom, how much time you spent trying to work out your thoughts before the water turned cold and you were forced to step out. Putting on some comfy clothes, you curled up on the couch, holding one of the couch pillows close.

Sanji

Walking into the living room, Sanji’s smile fell. The look on your face was so despondent, so downcast. He hated seeing you like this.

“Mon amour, what’s wrong?” the blond asked, kneeling on the floor next to the couch, reaching up to caress your cheek. Looking up at him, you debated on what to say. You really didn’t want to worry him, especially over something so… trivial. He had enough to worry about. Yet the look in his eyes begging you to tell him, to talk to him. The young man was always telling you that you could talk to him about anything, to come to him if you were ever feeling upset.

“Do… Do I deserve an apology?” your heart ached as the words finally left your lips, a look of alarm crossing Sanji’s features.

“Darling, what happened?” Sanji was immediately moving to the couch as he pulled you into his arms. Though he wanted to know what happened, he didn’t care if you were in the right or wrong, you were hurting. Taking a deep breath, you told him about what happened with your friend. Told him what she’d said, your insecurities, your feelings, everything. His hold on your tightened, holding you closer as he listened, one hand running up and down your back soothingly. Once you were finished, Sanji sat there for a moment, simply comforting you as he thought about what to say.

“My dearest love, I’m so sorry. You didn’t deserve that. You’re so amazing, so kind and caring. You don’t deserve to be hurt like that.” Sanji’s lips met your forehead, making you smile slightly as you snuggled further into him, “Which of your friends is this? Perhaps I can speak to her about apologizing. She should know she hurt you. I doubt she meant to hurt your feelings, but all the same, she did. If nothing else, perhaps you can work things out. Even if an apology isn’t given, perhaps you can get her to understand your feelings. But please, don’t bottle this up, don’t let it eat at your heart." His words made you smile as you nuzzled shyly into his chest. He always seemed to know what to say, what to do. He had a point, at very least, if you could work this out, then it wouldn’t happen again. If you could get her to understand your feelings, understand how hurt you were, if she made sure not to hurt you again, perhaps an apology wouldn’t matter. Her actions would apologize for her, she’d be better and your friendship would be stronger. A thought dawned on you as you glanced back up at him.

“And if she refuses to apologize? If she thinks she didn’t do anything wrong?” you asked worriedly, biting your lip again.

“Then they don’t deserve you and you need new friends, my love.” Sanji said softly, putting his thumb on your lip, forcing you to stop biting it, “Don’t be afraid to leave those who don’t deserve you in an attempt to find those who do. You won’t make real friends if you don’t try. Whether you become better friends with her or you find better friends elsewhere, it’s better to find those who appreciate you.” His words make your heart swell as you rested your head against him, feeling infinitely better. You’d talk to her tomorrow, if all went well, she’d apologize and if she refused, you’d find those worthy of your friendship.

Law

It was a while before Law stumbled into the living room, clearly exhausted from a long day doing rounds at the hospital. The surprisingly young doctor’s brow furrowed as he looked at your dispirited form. Normally you’d greet him with a smile and a kiss on the cheek. Sometimes you’d have a snack or dinner ready for him, other times, you’d have started a hot shower for him. It didn’t take a genius for him to see that something was very clearly wrong. Taking a moment to think, Law finally pulled you close, wrapping his arms around you.

“Tell me what’s wrong.” He said simply, already putting a hand on your head so you’d rest against his collarbone. Swallowing hard, you tried to gather your thoughts. You knew there was no hiding it from him. Of the few times you’d tried, he always knew you were lying and coaxed it out of you sooner or later.

After another moment, you began to tell him what had happened, occasionally stopping as you began to worry that you were babbling again. Each time, Law would tell you to continue, reassuring you that it was fine, even if you apologized for rambling. Of the many things he’d never admit, he actually liked your rambling, liked your babbling and childish nature. It was the yin to his yang. You were bright and sunny, offsetting his rather serious, aloof personality. And while you were bright and sunny, you weren’t annoying about it. You weren’t some bimbo with an empty head who flounced around talking about the most shallow, inconsequential, idiotic things. Not some superficial pretty face with no cares in the world. There was more to you than that. He found you beautiful, yes, and you were bright and you blabbered, sure; but you had more than two brain cells, you weren’t shallow, you cared very deeply. A little bright, cheery, slightly child-like actions were a welcome change in his life.

You soon finished telling him what was wrong, followed by a million apologies for being over dramatic and annoying. After about 10 seconds of apologizing, his hand met the side of your head in a light ‘smack’, though said smack was more like a light tap of his fingers meant to shut you up and stop your endless apologies.

“Stop apologizing, I asked what was wrong and kept telling you to continue. You don’t need to apologize. Your friend’s the one who should apologize. I really don’t care about what happened or why. She hurt your feelings, she made you question yourself, you need to talk to her. Even I apologize if I hurt Bepo, Shachi, or Penguin. She needs to know she hurt your feelings and work it out with you. You realize this’ll just keep happening if you don’t talk about it, right? She won’t realize she hurt you and she’ll just do it again. If you want this to get better, say something, ask for a damned apology. If she doesn’t give you one or says you're overreacting, leave. You need friends who will listen to you and try to understand you, not ones who’ll make you feel bad just for wanting to express how you’re feeling.” Law sighed and tilted his head back. Despite his advice, he really wasn’t good at this. The way he handled things and the way you handled things were completely different.

“What if it starts a fight? What if I lose them? I really don’t want to lose my friends.” you asked, giving him a worried look.

“Then they aren’t friends, they’re people who are taking advantage of you. You really think I treat the others the same way? It’s basic respect to acknowledge a person’s feelings and try to right things. To improve your relationship by being better.” His words weren’t exactly soft or gentle, but as always, you could see right through him. You saw the care and love behind them. You nodded as you took a deep breath, letting him continue to hold you.

“Alright, I’ll try. Just… Please, take that day off. I want someone to comfort me if this starts an argument or they say they don’t want to be friends anymore.” you pleaded, making him nod.

“Of course. Just… just know that if they want to end your friendship over something instead of just saying a few simple words, then they don’t deserve you. It’ll hurt, but you deserve better.” Law said softly, continuing to comfort you.

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violynt-skies · 2 years

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Why Leo didn’t truly step into the leader role until the Krang Invasion:

(this is gonna be a bit of a longer post but i’ve just got so much to say on this so plz bare w me for it. i shall include a TLDR at the end tho bc ik i have a tendency to ramble.)

okay so from the beginning of the movie it is clear the Leo hasn’t really taken his leader position super seriously, even after two years we can still see the group seeming to follow Ralph’s lead the majority of the time, with Leo going off plan and doing what he wants.

But i believe that the real reason leo took the role of leader so leniently and didn’t really change his behavior regarding it till the Krang invasion occurred is most likely due to a crippling fear of failure.

Because if he pretends to not care and turn everything into a joke there will always be the excuse that he was never really trying and that’s was why he was a bad leader if anyone ever tried to questioned it

BUT. if he were ever to actually try and really attempt to step into his role, it would mean that if he ever failed at any point during that time, then it would truly mean that he was a bad leader. And Leo wanted to avoid that conclusion at all costs.

His coping mechanism has always been humor, an attempt to cover up true feelings and take away from the seriousness of a situation bc it lessens the impact of any high emotions going on at that time.

It’s the same way procrastination works for so many people. In the way that people will put off doing the work because they’re afraid of failing even after putting in effort. Procrastination is an excuse for doing badly and hurts less than if you actually gave it your all and still failed. His humor and casualness is an excuse for his lackluster behavior as leader.

Leo has been shown on few separate occasions of his insecurities regarding his placement and role in the team, and with the leader role having been pushed on him, the reality of those insecurities becoming true became closer than ever before and he wanted to avoid that at all cost.

Even during the movie when Raph is lecturing him we can see how Leo takes criticism. He deflects all the time and never wants to come to terms with it because he doesn’t want to face his own faults, but he’s also shown to clearly be listening and you can tell the words are sinking in he just doesn’t want to accept them.

And this behavior continues because till that point things have turned out fine for Leo. The way he ran things has always “gotten results.” And it wasn’t until those methods actually resulted in real consequences (Raph getting kidnapped) where he has to become more serious and enforces his position as leader because he can’t afford to be lenient about it anymore, especially with Raph out of commission.

In terms of procrastination, the Krang Invasion was essentially his deadline and the point where he was finally needed to put in the effort.

However at this time he hasn’t reevaluate his behavior or the way he does things because he hasn’t been proven that his methods don’t work well for a team yet, and bc he was dealing with the distress from losing Raph his recklessness worsened.

This is until his brothers get trapped under the subway and he gets the wake up call he needs. And it’s soul crushing because this was a moment in time where he HAD been attempting to be a leader and he ended up failing. He finally had to face his own faults as a leader but this moment was so needed for him in order to improve.

And he does! He learns from his mistakes and takes the time to listen to his team and we can see his true potential shine through as he learns how to rely on his family and how to lead them.

And everything really kicks into high gear once on the Krangs ship as we see him understanding Ralph’s perspective while fighting him and watching his brothers struggle under the Krang as he gives his genuine apology and big motivation speech.

This is the final endpoint where we finally get to see him in action really step up as leader

of course the situation got worse before it gets better (insert entire last 30 minutes of the movie) and god that self-sacrifice scene was just heart-breaking and he’s going to be traumatized for life but that’s a post for another time

TLDR: Leo took his position as leader so casually because of the fear that if he ever actually attempted to lead he would end up failing, however in being lenient about it there would always be the excuse that he was never really trying and that would be the reason for any kind of failure that came his way. It was easier to brush off this reason than the other. However the Krang Invasion was a huge wake up call where he was needed to actually put in the effort and learn how to be a true leader, which he does eventually learn to be and succeed at it.

have some loving family shots cuz we deserve them <3

#i could probably go on and on abt this but it’s a bit long now so maybe later lmAo #i love this show sm tho #this is probably why he’s my fav tbh.#the ability to relate is too high istg #that and i’m such a fan of angst ahA #if the grammar is rough forgive me i wrote this all in like one sitting on my phone pF #this show has ruined me #rottmnt #rise of the tmnt #rottmnt season 3 #save rottmnt #rottmnt leo #rise leo #rottmnt raph #rottmnt donnie #rottmnt mikey

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existing-not-living · 4 months

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hey guys! this is going to be my last post i think as i’ve decided to give recovery a real shot as i need to take advantage of all the help and support i have in place now whilst i still have it - i hope you guys understand and support my decision :)

i have suffered with my eating disorder since april 2023 and since have lost around 65lbs (around 30kg), i was admitted to hospital in november due to refeeding and was discharged later in december with community support from my dietitian, psychologist etc, and i was still refusing food to the point i was being threatened with inpaitent again in early january and it had got to the point where i couldn’t even stand up from sitting without collapsing/fainting and my hair was falling out in huge chunks and all my blood tests were showing extreme deficiency’s and i finally realised how much the people around were worried and i realised i need to get better even if its not for myself but for the people around me, so since the middle of january ive managed to up my intake to 2 meals a day and im barely purging and not misusing laxatives at all anymore and of course this hasn’t been easy but i’ve been really engaging with the support and therapy sessions and i do really feel a difference, my weight at the beginning of january was 57kg and ive been maintaining that weight with my current diet and frequent exercise! its not as low as i would have wanted but i guess i can live healthily maintaining at 57kg because my recent blood test have shown improvements in my potassium, vitamin D and b12 however my calcium levels are still quite low and haven’t changed much but im trying to find ways to improve them, so yeh overall recovery is going okay at the moment i mean i still have bad days every now and again but that’s apart of recovery! i have felt the best i have felt physically in months and my mindset has really improved since.

i hope this maybe inspires/encourages someone to give recovery a go! not pushing it tho! everyone needs there own time :)

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cve-th3mvsic · 2 months

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i should be in bed.

meaning i should be asleep.

but nooo. /sar

i can’t fall asleep

so here’s some of my thoughts before they disappear

“it’s better to be obsessed with yourself than someone else” whoever said this is fucking right

i can’t get over how cool i look

i was looking through my photo album

seeing all the old pictures of me i took

from now all the way back to 2021

i actually have two photos of me from 2020. freaking crazy

but seeing how i looked back then actually makes me happy

like. i actually looked like a boy. the happiness it brings me to see how boy i looked. it brings me to tears (half serious)

seeing me back then, and seeing my hair. it’s like. wow.

but seriously tho. like. i looked fucking awesome and i didn’t even know it back then

my hair looked so boy. i love it. i didn’t know it back then, but i do know now.

but then again, before 2023 i felt like shit a lot. we all went through shit in 2019-2021. (2020 & 2021 suck. never wanna ever go back to that. fml dude. terrible. mostly because fucking cringe. don’t bring me back there.)

but on new year’s eve (before 2023) i told myself “this is gonna be a good year”

and guess what 2023 was?

a good fuckin’ year. /pos /gen

and it was a big improvement year for me.

a few shitty things happened (and were traumatizing) but i am so much better now than ever.

i feel confident in doing my own thing

it’s amazing

like to think about how i felt back then. i don’t even know what i felt back then when i think about it now, but it was terrible

and me now?

fucking amazing

i don’t think i give a shit about many things anymore

like i just do my own damn thing and not care about things like “do i look weird” “did someone think that was weird?”

and things like.. something as small as maybe tripping.

like tripping on my own feet (i’ve done it only a few times. but it’s still happened)

i trip, catch myself, and keep walkin. maybe laugh a little too. i’ll laugh at and with myself

and i know my laugh is pretty funny

funny in both positive and negative ways probably

but i get used to my laugh

i hear my laugh all the fucking time

sometimes i laugh at my laugh, and end up fucking cackling

but also sometimes, i hear my laugh and think “awh”, and then i think about how i feel about myself now, and i kind of wonder what if someone else felt this way about me? but like

ya know

i think i’d like to be social, but i am not social right now

i don’t have the mental capacity to even comprehend the day as it goes by.

ask me how my day was?

“uh. i dunno. lemme think-”

if there was nothing significant that happened, i respond with “it was okay”

but then when i really start to break down my thoughts and figure out what i did today, it’s like “oh. that’s more things than i thought there was”

oh and like being social

dude.

recently, i’ve had a feeling that a few different people have been givin’ me like. looks.

but not like “ew 🫤” looks or “i don’t like you.” looks. not creepy looks, ya know?

but like.

ya know when you have a crush on someone and you look at ‘em and then they look back at you for a second and that glimpse of eye contact is like “shit- 🫢 did they catch me lookin’-“

i’ve had a feeling that a few different people have

how do you explain it

like maybe they felt that way or something

ya know?

like i catch ‘em lookin’ or something

i could one hundred percent be ahead of myself or crazy for thinking that these people might have a crush on me or something

i mean, they don’t even know me, i don’t know them. how could they actually have a crush?

maybe it’s like an “i think they’re pretty” kinda look

sometimes

maybe

i dunno how to describe it

but like. okay. let’s give ‘em code names ‘cause it’s fun. (never had to give code names like this before. never even had a real crush i don’t think tbh.)

there’s DVD. or maybe let’s call them “DMV” ‘cause it’s kinda funnier

no. DVD, they’re DVD

so i have 4th hour with DVD. that’s it

only see ‘em in that class.

fuck my life dude it’s 11:58pm i’m gonna cry my balls off

i’ll finish this later

goodnight

sleep welll everyone

#cve goes crazy #it’s 11:31pm #i really need sleep #ima regret not trying harder to sleep #eff sleepy loopy time #give me sleep time

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miffydolls · 5 months

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happy 2017 i love all of you

honestly i don’t get much traction on here or any other platform besides when i post art or there’s like, drama.. i’m sorta used to it tho and have kinda preferred it this way. but i think i did a lot better this year at coming out of my shell & sharing my creations. i even joined a map that was really fun to do with one of my closest best friends, the same one i met in person for the first time in October

so, @bigbadconnivingbastard hi Pearl <3 thanks for making my 2023 amazing. there’s so much i could say to you but first & foremost thank you for believing in my change. you’ve stuck by me for like 3-4 years now, but i feel like we really did something this year. i love watching you get better and i love hearing you talk about all the crazy stuff you’re into, i hope you and i can start talking more because i do miss you. thanks you for everything you do, thank you for being my friend. i cannot stress enough how much of a positive impact you’ve had on me, i’ve been getting better for you & it makes me so happy that we got to hang out again recently

@asteix0 hi Cereal!!! god i remember meeting you for the first time in the spiders gc and honestly thinking you were so cool, i wanted to talk to you more & i still do, and it kinda sucks i’m too shy to come out of our server to talk to you straight up. you keep the server alive & i love seeing your art and your improvement, you are such an inspiration to me and i am so thankful that you’re here for me, too. thanks for sharing pics of ur STUPID ASS FUCKING DOG when i’m sad and always being there to comfort me <3

@vam-piritz HI!!! DAD!!!! funny story, do u know ur like, one of the first people i got comfortable with to say “i love you” to again? i sorta had a wacko period where i didn’t say it to anyone but you kinda changed that, i wanted to appreciate you a lot and show you that i care. i really hope you’re doing okay because gosh i do love you platonically!!!! i love being milkyway cookie & stardust cookie together, i love having u in my life and giggling at the crazy shit u do in the server. ur my dad 4 lyfe

as for all my moots and people i’ve kinda sorta interacted with too, off the top of my head, Loki!!!, Anna, Q and Nisa, thank you if you ever see this <3 even if not, thas ok! you all improved my 2023 so much by interacting with me and unintentionally giving me spaces to talk & co exist with others. happy 2024 suckahhhhssss

#cherry siblin’#charlie father #momma cereal

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spextronaut · 1 year

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My thoughts on this week’s episode of the Mandalorian:

I really hope this episode is good considering it’s, yk, the last episode of the season

“Moff Gideon is alive” no shit Bo-Katan

I’d like some helmetless Din pls as payment for how shit this season has been

he’s so babygirl fr fr

oh shit he’s a badass babygirl good for him

GROGU SAVING HIS DAD!!!!!!! IM FUCKIJG CRYING

“I need you to be brave for me” BROOOOOO 😭😭

“You with me?” DIN SHUT YOUR FUCKING MOUTH

if Din doesn’t remove his helmet at all I will fucking cry Pedro said we’d get more helmetless Din content 😭

R5 you fucking icon

“I’m sorry I don’t speak binary” bro. bro. fucking he. I cry

R5 my favorite anxiety ridden droid

Mandos always slay fr

mkay well that decoy didn’t fucking work

Another death from the looks of it but at least I don’t give a shit about this dude

This is some s2 shit thank god I adore he

Omfg I adore him look at this fucker what a badass

R5 KILLED A DROID WHAT THR FUCK

goddamn rockstar slide what a slay

R5 can fly?????

Grogu my absolute beloved

why are there people in tubes that seems kinda illegal

FUCKING JUMPSCARE JESYS CHRIST

The armorer really seems sus and idk how to feel about it

I miss when Din had the Darksaber smh

I won’t complain about Bo Katan and the armorer slaying so hard tho I love that

????? What the fuck???

Grogu really shouldn’t be here ngl

Don’s getting his shit rocked that’s always fun

Oh god not these fuckers a 3v1 is far from fair

GROGU SAVE YOUR FUCKING DAD AGAIN!!!!

if they kill Grogu. I swear on my fucking life I’m not coming back

GROGU BEAT THEY FUCKIN ASSES

Din ain’t doing too hot rn that’s not great

HELL YEAH “I’ve got this. Go save your kid” IM FUCKING CRYIJG

DIN DJARIN YOU FUCKINH ICON I LOVE YOU

THEYRE FIGHTINH TOGETHER FOT THE FIRST TIME I LOVE THIS

“You did good, kid” IM NOT CRYING NO NOT AT ALL

HE BROKE THE FUCKING DARKSABER???? I DIDNT INOW THAT WAS RVEN POSSIBLE

YES DIN AND GROGU BEAT HIS ASS

if they kill these icons I’m gonna start crying

DO NOT HURT GROGU THATS ALL I WANT

GROGU OH MY FUCKING GOD WHAT A FUCKING ICON I LOVE YOU THATS SO AWESOME YHIS SCRNE IS FUCKING GROGEOUS WHAT THE FUCK

OHHH HE EEPY 😭😭

if Grogu bathes in the living waters I will cry

OHHH MY FUCKING GOD HES GONNA DO IT WE FULL FUCKING CIRCLE RN

OHH MY GOF HE SO SMALL

“Apprentice” fuck off he’s your son

IF HIS PARENT GAVE PERMISSION. OH MY FUCKING GOD

OHHH MY FUCKING GOD

“I will adopt him as my own” FUCKING FINALLY THANK YOU THANK YOU THSNK YOU

DIN GROFU. DIN GROGU IH MY FUCKING GOD OH MY FUCKING GOD IM CRYING HES BIS SON NOW ITS CANON WAAAAA

AND THE MYTHOSAUR IS STILL HERE WHAT A SLAY

fuck off I don’t care about Bo Katan GROFU JS DIN’S SON FR FR

okay nevermind we relit the forge that’s fucking awesome

THE LITTLE LEGS ONFG HES SO EXCITED

WE BACK TO BOUNTY HUNTING!!!! THANK FUCKING GOD!!!!

IM SO EXCITED FOR NEXT SEASON ITS GONNA BE SO FUCKING GOOD

DIN GROGU 😭😭😭

IG-11 IS BACK OH MY FUCKING GOD IM CRYING IM SOBBING NOOOOO FUCK

remove the helmet. please. please I’m begging

HES GOT A FROG!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

are you fucking. Not a single helmet removal all season. I’m insulted

But omfg this is a 10/10 episode I loved it so so much everyone was a badass this was such an improvement

I’m actually gonna come back for next season now since the set up for next season was great and I’m really excited for more bounty hunting shenanigans. And Bo Katan should be relocated to a more minor side character again, but I understand why she was more the focus of this season now it’s good setup for next season

Overall it was a really fun episode and I’m excited to see where they take it from here, even tho I’m disappointed that Din didn’t take his helmet off at all this season

#the mandadlorian #the mandalorian season 3 #the mandalorian #the mandalorian spoilers #the mandalorian season 3 spoilers #the mandalorian season 3 episode 8 #the mandolorian s3 ep8 #the mandalorian chapter 24 #din djarin #grogu #bo katan kryze #the armorer

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magicalbats · 6 days

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Wuwa got me down bad rn. Played through all the story, it's...okay? Acts 5 & 6 were definitely better but felt rushed as hell. My man Jiyan is the MVP though, his companion quest was REALLY good and I lucked out and got him R3 + sig in 140 pulls. I love the way the world looks and combat feels good. Aalto is also 10/10, I love Calchero's design but haven't played much with him yet, and I'm still miffed that I haven't managed to pull Taoqi yet. The bug fixes have been rolling in steadily so I'm hopeful that the experience will be a lot smoother in the near future. As long as they can continue an upwards trend in the writing I think I'll be hooked.

All that in only 140 pulls? ✋😭 I’m green with envy tbh lmao I’ve had some so-so luck in the past when it comes to gacha’s but never quite like this, it’s actually insane. I just keep pulling the same two characters — Yangyang and Danjin who are both now R4 at this point ndkdkckdd NO Aalto. NO Mortefi. NO Baizhi. NO Yuanwu and I don’t even really want him but at this point I’d be happy just to see a different face pop up 🤣 I only got Taoqi once early on and never again so even pulling her would be fine in my book, haha. Shes kinda’ thicc tho isn’t she 👀

And I’m largely in agreement with you about the story. I’ve heard whispers over on Twitter that some pretty big changes were made between the last closed beta and launch because people complained about the characters not being very nice to us at first? And that’s why the early bits feel kind of off … but tbh I’m of the opinion that it probably still would’ve felt a bit rushed regardless. Whereas Genshin kind of eased us into the complex lore and expansive world building at a reasonable enough pace, I feel like WuWa threw an awful lot at us all at once. : /

That being said, the noticeable improvement in acts 5 & 6 left me very hopeful for the future of the storyline. I see a lot of potential here and I SO hope they manage to find their groove and keep the momentum going.

I’m also very, very much looking forward to seeing Scar again … if you know what I mean.

And I played Jiyan’s SQ last night, it was definitely solid. He’s a good man. 😭 Not to mention crazy gorgeous, haha. I also love that we got a memento picture with him out of it. Idk if anyone agrees with me on this or not but right now the vibe kind of feels like they’re not shying away from the characters openly showing interest in us and that definitely makes me hopeful for where they might take this as well. I don’t remember the name of their organization but both Scar and that Camelyn(?) girl clearly had the hots for us so. 🤣 Hopefully no one complains about that because I’ll be mad as hell if they switch up on us after already taking away Scar’s onigiri pussy lol

Anyway yeah I’m tentatively locked in for the moment. I’ll at least stick around to see how the next patch looks. Here’s my UID if anyone wants to add me btw 501269494 ❤️

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menalez · 4 months

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A girl I dated at years ago, in a fit of rage, nearly choked me to death because she convinced herself I was sleeping with a male. All because I didn’t want to have sex with her, which is something she knew from the start and was okay with waiting. It was not the first time she had put her hands on me either, but it took her almost ending my life for me to take a hint and stop making excuses for her. At the end of the day, I had no business being with her type or trying to convince myself that I was fit to live in a Set It Off reality (lmao too adventurous and trying to be captain save-a-hoe) She had a history of thug activities, so I take full responsibility for what I got myself into and how I allowed myself to be a victim. This is a gold star lesbian btw and she’s since been to jail several times for beating on females and a multitude of other petty crimes/demonic activities. Last year, she apologized to me (7 years late girl) and admitted that she purposely gets herself sent to jail because she enjoys all of the female attention she gets there as a masculine female. Truly Pathetic and I regret not listening to my mother when she’d literally told me “that girl is a demon and you need to stay away from her.”

that sounds horrible 😭 i’m so sorry u went thru that. especially the fact that she did that to u for not being ready to have sex.. just horrible and gross. i’m glad u stood ur ground and dumped her in the end at least.

i have a similar story with my ex (she’s bi tho) & she was violent for no reason. just seriously mentally unwell basically and the red flags were pretty obvious but i overlooked them bc i guess i just did not see my self-worth. she also choked me and it was literally just. random. she’d wake up and immediately get on top of me and choke me. one time i think she did it as some kind of “joke” and i ended up throwing up bc of it … also she had a few weeks in our relationship where she was basically storing cocaine for dealers at her place & she was stealing cocaine from them and going on cocaine binges which u can imagine how she’d act in those moments if she was trying to kill me when she’s sober! she was on ketamine once and literally bit my friend. just insane stuff. and ppl like that are never worth it nor can u somehow “save” them bc when they’re that bad, they usually don’t care to make themselves better. in my case she even tried to convince me that IM the one who’s worse off.. bc i “cry too much”. also she stole my wallet and when the police said they saw who stole it and described her to a T, she convinced me that she knows who it is and will find this woman and get my wallet and money back. would give me these stories about it too.

also the woman u dated sounds .. desperate tbh! from my experience at least, masculine lesbians don’t need jail to find interested women. they tend to get plenty of attention in general. at least that was the case for basically every masculine lesbian i had a thing with. she must rly have low self-worth and have problems to be putting herself in and out of jail just to get more female attention. i hope she gets better bc i assume she must be miserable if she’s still living like that. i’m glad ur out of that situation and kept urself safe,, it’s rly not worth it to date women like that n to tell urself that you can somehow “save” them,, i learned that the hard way 😭 u deserve better than that. no point in regretting it tho— we can’t undo our pasts, but we can at least use these negative experiences as ways to improve ourselves and teach ourselves somehow. at least that’s what i tell myself to cope with what i’ve been thru lmao,, and at least i can say in terms of my ex, it did teach me to look out for red flags more and not disrespect myself so badly that i’m willing to be abused and exploited and manipulated in the hope of gaining a woman’s love

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toournextadventure · 2 months

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hey not to rant but i read your advice and i’m lowkey losing my mind because of it (positive) and i think context would be nice for what im gonna say in the end. also i ramble so it might be on the longer aside anyway. i did the speech and i actually thought i did pretty well since it’s only my third speech and i saw a lot of improvement BUT (and i’m so irked) some kid blurted out that i had gone way under the time limit and delivered it in a way that seemed so awful so that sort of planted the seed that made me feel like my life was falling apart even tho i know it’s silly (i’m not entirely sure by how much because i felt sort of humiliated and scared to ask lol) but it was like damn ! (and rude too? to me at least. im a little more old fashioned i guess? idk what the term would be but sometimes i’m so bothered by some peoples lack of respect? tact? SOMETHING LIKE THAT!! i just think ppl are kind of childish, not the point btw sorry) i knew i wasn’t perfect but i felt good about myself and it sucked cause i think if i had found out on my own it would have been okay but since he sort of put me on the spot it sucked :/ i could feel the pity oozing off of everyone which was like rubbing salt in the wound. and i’ve been telling myself that it’s okay, it’s a beginner class and i’m there to improve but i couldn’t stop mulling over it but i saw you responded and when i read “you’re better than a speech” i just felt so much better like i could burst into tears. i just melted and it was like i could finally breathe a bit better without feeling that heaviness? (okay maybe i’m a tad dramatic but that’s what i felt!) i’m still a bit bummed but hearing that reassurance healed me a bit so thank you !

My dude! First, congratulations!!! You did it and I'm so proud of you!!! 🥳🥳🥳 Second? Fuck that dude, because that was BEYOND unnecessary. I'm very much the kind of person that encourages CONSTRUCTIVE AND PRODUCTIVE criticism, but that dude had NONE of that. Be proud of yourself! It still sucks to hear other people say that shit, but you still did your speech! And no matter what, it's always way better than what you believe it was!

Kids are mean. Young adults are mean. But if you were proud of your speech, and you were proud of what you did, then that's the important part. Sometimes people are just plain rude, but that doesn't diminish your success and your achievements. Be proud of yourself, because I promise other people are too 🫶

#answered

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sundayinthcpark · 4 months

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okay so i’m still scribbling down ideas and i’m kinda stoned and idk if i’ll ever manage to write this cos i have never rlly written anything like this (literally anything i’ve never written for one of these fandoms i’ve never finished a multi chap plotted fic i’ve never written an in-depth au like idk if i even could do this) but the other day my brain decided WOULDN’T IT BE COOL if Kingsman and UNIT were the same people. (and honestly MIB: International a bit too) but like. Kingsman Doctor Who AU. that’s mostly focused on osgate.

for whatever reason, the code name Arthur isn’t used and is instead replaced with The Doctor. why, idk. there doesn’t need to be a reason. just, when the doctor, the brig, and liz shaw all started this, he decided his code name was The Doctor and it’s been that way since

also the plot was: three different stories, spanning a couple different time periods.

first story (kingsman: the secret service) is very much just stolen ideas from what i know of the Cyber-Reality Big Finish stories. which admittedly about 80% of that (i did start listening to them. finally) is because of @technicallywrite’s fanfic 🫡 but i promise i am doing my research. but anyway like that cyber program instead of valentine’s program??? osgood thinking kate’s dead for like half the story adds some fun to it and i could add kate’s pov w whatever’s happening to her OR i could just. go off from Kingsman and do it closer to Big Finish and just call it good.

ideally: harry = kate; eggsy = osgood; arthur = 12th doctor; merlin = river

considering replacing jakobi!master w gomez!master for some extra fun? like it just could be fun is all.

also: focus is osgate but there is background stuff going on. 12/River/Missy ???? do some fun little twists get them all together i think they deserve it. also other knights/agents would be (possibly.) amy, rory, clara, rose, yaz, donna, martha, bill, sam, josh, gwen, ianto, maybe jack? not as important characters literally just names to fill in blanks. i have code names for them too just in case it’s needed as well as ships cos background ships r always so fun

also was thinking abt the possibility of: sarah jane is the lancelot being replaced. i don’t wanna kill her either but. it adds some fun messy stuff for kate cos i am always a sarah jane/kate truther but also establishing it all could be messy

also was considering just having sarah jane have been a past agent that kate’s father knew (will get into family history in a sec) and kate got to occasionally hear some stories about her OR sarah jane is kate’s aunt (basically they knew each other but sarah jane is gone now and kate struggles with that a bit)

cos kate’s dad was obviously part of Kingsman which is how Kate got recruited- sorta. (here is why i want sarah jane to be. important and not related to kate but i can’t change some of it) cos she technically still had to be recruited but sarah jane kept an eye on kate while she was in military training and actually recruited her having not realised who she was until after she had already decided

which is about to be what happens here cos. osgood is a rlly fucking good hacker and they can hack into p much any database okay so kingsman has been keeping an eye on them- not cos they’re worried that osgood will reveal them, just cos they kinda think she’s brilliant- and kate actually ends up running into them at a bar. where idk what but some kinda relatively easy to defeat alien shows up right and kate has to get rid of it and suddenly there’s a lot going on but kate is asking osgood to come to kingsman with her

and basically what osgood had been doing is kinda like. non-violent the beekeeper type shit like hacking elon musk’s bank account to send a billion dollars to palestine or some shit like just trying to improve the world in whatever ways right

and then osgood’s ends up joining kingsman (sorry but skip the ‘roxy beats eggsy’ plot line cos even tho i love roxy i don’t have time to figure out how to fit weird sexism into this especially cos not one man has actually been a part of this story yet) and proceeds to get sucked into the Cyber-Reality storyline

lowkey tho a) i need to learn how to write smut because i need them to hook up at least once probably pre-cyber like. anything. like they r attracted to each other. maybe that’s how kate learns about them in the first place is they hook up and osgood tells kate what they do with their life and kate decides to look into her work

(just occurred to me this may not be obvious but she/they osgood. possibly they/then doctor too cos i like fucking around w characters’ pronouns)

but anyway yeah i actually lowkey want the story to end with them not quite having figured themselves out but knowing they’re gonna do it together (😏)

but def positive ending cos i have not thought out Kingsman: The Golden Circle yet

i have figured out origins but not entirely how to make it follow a plot line yet but there’s a strong chance of it involving the third doctor, liz shaw, and the brigadier and possibly autons. liz = galahad; brig = merlin. and obviously it’ll have threebrig. but it’s a separate story i’ve barely thought about

also figuring out how to make the time jump from three to twelve but also still having time in there for kate to come around? it’s gonna be interesting for sure

this is so much rambling j am very sorry and i’m also very tired and i definitely could do better hashing this out and i’m working on doing better hashing this out i just also needed to ramble at someone. lol

#luke rambles #doctor who #kingsman #osgate #hartwin #sorta ish

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sonic-spirit · 2 years

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OKAY, STAR STABLE, LET’S GOOOO!!!

So a week ago I started playing the MMO Star Stable Online. Which by all accounts is an awful idea, because it’s a clunky, overpriced trainwreck. And I am having so much fun.

Okay, maybe “fun” is a bit strong. I absolutely can’t recommend it. But I’ve got a long history of, “It’s terrible, and I LOVE IT,” with various media, and this is falling firmly into that category.

:readmore:

The premise of Star Stable (or SSO, but I’m gonna be stubborn and call it Star Stable) is that you are a girl (and you can only be a girl) who’s gone out to summer riding camp, because you both really like horses, and because you feel a faint mystical draw. And like, haven’t we all, right? So you’re this girl, you’re assigned a horse that the stable later “sells” to you (your only free horse) because their owners moved far away and don’t really come out to them anymore so it all works out for everyone.

You create your avatar from the super limited stock hairstyles and makeup designs that look like Bratz rejects, pick your horse’s coat color and name, and away you go into a janky World of Warcraft clone of your horse girl dreams! And no joke, apparently the original name of the company that owns Star Stable was “World of Horsecraft”. So yeah, loooots of very WoW game mechanics without some of the quality of life improvements that that game received over the last 10 years.

Cuz yeah, Star Stable Online was initially released in October 2011 (in Sweden, it went worldwide in June 2012). It was also actually a follow-up to the Starshine Legacy, Star Academy, and Star Stable games…but I’m still gonna be stubborn and keep calling it Star Stable.

Like most games targeted at horse girls it’s full of superficialness and jank. But it actually has some interesting story going on and isn’t just about putting bows on vaguely unsettling horse models! It’s a win!

I really like the story so far. There’s some evil industrialists doing shady shit for real estate schemes and environmentally terrible oil drilling, and ALSO the EEEEVIL horse girls with EEEEVIL horses, naturally called the Dark Riders.

And DUDE. So like, I understand that the long-time fanbase is upset about the character re-designs and apparently there were some personality changes too, and that absolutely sucks on characters you know and are attached to. But as someone coming in from the outside?

WHAT a glow-up. Like, new style Sabine has SEVERE dark mommy dom energy. And fuuuuck, those arms, tho. Like, that’s not even usually my thing, and I’m all damn. ^_^ Though I do like pretty boys that can beat me up, so pretty girls that can beat me up is not really a stretch.

And like, LOOK AT THIS BEAUTIFUL CANONICAL LESBIAN! I love her! I love Alex!

So yeah. I do see the charm of the old art style, especially the more of the 2D art I see. But the new 3D models are SOOOO NICE. Just A+

But not all the characters have been updated yet! Or even most!

Ya wanna see Mario next to Ydris?

Because there’s a scene where you ABSOLUTELY do, and it’s hilarious.

^_^ Yeh, Ydris is on his way to Tumblr daddy-itude, if not there already.

Fun fact: The first NPC you meet, Justin Moorland? NOT ONE OF THE UPDATED CHARACTERS YET.

Look at him. Glorious.

So yeah. The player avatars are apparently set to be getting an update soon-ish, like, there’s a closed beta going on, apparently, but yeah. Not there yet.

So here’s my dude:

Yeah. It’s a whole thing.

Sooo, I don’t love that you have to be a girl. Like, there’s just no option, and the game’s writers have stated it’s not gonna change—that the story is about a young girl, and since plenty of games are locked as stories about dudes they don’t see a problem with locking you in on that.

So, if you happen to be a transmasc enby, as a very non-random example, you get to run around a game world with everyone calling you she/her, girl, my darling, that sort of thing. Like, for me it mostly just feels not great, I don’t mind the rapidly over-affectionate endearments people throw out to girls, though I’d rather do that while calling me a boy, but it could def be p triggering to some trans guys. If the game stokes any kind of interest and you’re transfem, though, I could see it really scratching a nice gender place.

But yeah. I don’t see the push-back to games that lock your character in place as a boy being to lock you in place as a girl instead, actually. The real push back is options. Give us options. Let us swim in the wild ocean of gender, adrift in ways only we can imagine. Give us some customization when that’s already the point of the game. We’re not playing as Sally from Stockholm. We’re playing as You, the MC. Hell, I’d honestly be good with the same character model but you can get different (ie flat chest) looks with clothing items and a field to enter in pronouns to be plugged in by the system. Bonus if you let me select endearments I’m okay with. Like, I’m stoked they’re gonna be updated the avatar models, and when that happens I SERIOUSLY hope they include build options, and honestly when they do roll it out I’m gonna have way higher standards than I would about simply making the current models easier for trans and nonbinary players to live with. I’m mostly keeping my requests to NPC interactions, because it’s a lot easier to edit text than character models.

That being said, locking the hair and makeup options behind the “This is the in-game currency you can only get with real, actual money,” is scummy as hell.

Which brings me to the predatory aspects of the game, and why I absolutely shouldn’t be playing it, and why I absolutely will not recommend it, no matter how much I enjoy/end up enjoying it.

Shit costs mad money. And it only gets worse from there.

There’s two ways to play: An $80 lifetime membership, or an $8 per month subscription. There’s subscription bundles, but they still charge you the same $8 per month, just in larger chunks. There is a trial free-play up to level 5, and I got to level 6 on it before running out of anything to do. Because it strangles you down not by kicking you out of the game when you hit the level 5 cap, but by not opening up new parts of the map, and by not generating additional quests in the places you can get to—despite there still being plenty of local quests you’d otherwise have access to, or even by giving you the quests you can’t complete because you’re locked into the first two or so areas. There’s also a one-time-option two-week membership for $4, which is what I’m currently on.

Because although I’ve all but made up my mind…I’m still making up my mind. Money’s tight. Is this worth the $80 to me?

Because I am not giving them a cent after that.

See, the most predatory part of the game is that there’s two currencies: Jorvik shillings, gained through quests and training, and Star Coins, made of real actual dollars (or krona, cuz Sweden). And there’s two ways to get Star Coins. You receive 100 per week in an “allowance” through your paid subscription (this is also true for the lifetime membership), or through buying them.

That’s it. No quest rewards, no ability to transfer Jorvik shillings into Star Coins, nothing. And though some items can be paid for by either Jorvik shillings or Star Coins, many items can’t. And guess where the horses land.

STAR COINS, BAY-BEEEEE! That’s right, you can get more, newer, shiny horses to love and play with. To bond with and ride. To become overly attached to the pixels on the screen cuz roleplay, bay-bee! And all it costs is a mere 900 Star Coins. Sometimes more.

Yeah. And again, you can ONLY use Star Coins to get horses, AND they’ve been releasing new horses every month.

Like, the point of the game’s story is not to collect all the horses…but it’s absolutely where the company wants their players to be looking at and thinking about. They promote and pump out these bright, shiny, beautiful things, and people snatch them up.

It takes 9 weeks to save up for one horse. Nearly 2 months. Unless you buy more Star Coins.

And it’s not just new horses that are locked behind a paywall. Remember how I complained about avatar customization? Well it’s BACK, bay-bee! You can change your avatar’s hair and makeup. You can buy new looks and swap them out. For Star Coins. And only Star Coins. Wanna change your home stable—the place you store the inventory you don’t carry in your bag, and the place you keep your horses, go back to to switch out your character customization, etc? Real Money Coins. Want to expand the number of slots in your stable? I think that’s also Real Money Coins, but I could be misremembering…it’s to their advantage to keep slots costing, but cheaper.

Everything you buy has the Real Money Coin option. Not everything has the shillings option. And again, some of the choicest stuff is behind that meat grinder, and wouldn’t it just be easier to just pay, rather than waiting weeks and weeks?

Yeah. It’s gross.

Holy micro-transactions, Batman! But the hole goes deeper.

So, there’s a mobile app. Well, technically there’s two, cuz the game itself was ported to mobile in 2020. You can do it, but I don’t recommend it. The clunky play is even worse on a touch screen, it’s pretty resource-intensive and suuuper drained my battery, and heated up my phone a significant amount. So yeah, you can. But it’s p bad.

But they also have a mobile app that’s designed to be a mobile app, and not just a 10-year-old game ported over to run on different hardware. It’s Horse Tamagotchi. That’s it. It’s just a Tamagotchi game, but horses.

Changing my thinking from “Horse raising sim” to “Horse Tamagotchi” is how I kept from bouncing right off, by the way.

You get a foal of your choice from the fairly large selection of horse breeds and raise it up to an adult. Once you get it up to level 10, you can use your Real Money Coins to transfer your new baby to the Real Game. As a level one. Of 15.

To be fair, it only takes three days to max level them, and you could probably do it quicker if you really wanted to. But why would you want to unless you already had the coins ready for transfer? Nothing you do after they reach cap is gonna affect them going over. Like, there’s a happiness meter, so theoretically that might transfer, but this is a game that dumps your quest log when you log out, so I doubt it.

Yeah, I didn’t mention that yet. If you have an in-progress quest when you log out or lose connection, no you didn’t, you haven’t accepted it yet, actually. So remember what you were up to, and don’t take more quests than you’ll finish in one session. This is honestly easy to do, most of the quests are short, and often are, running between two places or fetch quests. But it does go against most people’s WoW-taught impulse. I’m just lucky I started the game intending to pick it clean of content, and began with only taking one quest at a time. It’s been more enjoyable than grabbing every quest I encountered ever was, and helped me actually follow the story, unlike some of my WoW playing, but yeah. Not exactly the way you expect to play an MMO.

So back to Horse Tamagotchi. You get your foal, “Play minigames” with it (swipe up-down-left-right, drag and drop, or move your finger slow or fast over it to Do A Thing), level until it gets tired, then stop. There’s a gardening mechanic to get treats you can also sell for coins, and some dress-up and decorate mechanics that mostly cost Real Money. You can have up to 3 stalls for free, after that it’s Real Money. Like I said, there’s a decently wide selection of horse breeds, and some of the coat colors are app exclusives—so the only way to get That Breed in That Color. And different colored horse is what the community is About, soooo. Yeah.

I picked an Appaloosa, a Paso Fino, and a Welsh Pony, cuz there’s pony races only ponies can do, and I want in. My absolute favorite horse breed, cuz I’m basic like that, is the Arabian. And that’s not in the app (or possibly not in the app yet). So I picked my second favorite, a cool gaited breed I was also planning to buy in game eventually, and a pony for those sweet, sweet pony races. And I think all three might have app-exclusive coat colors? So that’s neat.

But that makes 3 more horses I’d like to bring into the main game. That’s 18 weeks of play, plus another 10 to get an Arabian because you bet your ass I’m getting my favorite breed, and Arabs cost 950 Real Monies, cuz they special. So that’s nearly 6 months for all these horses, and for me to either impulsively break down and lay out the money OR(and) get bored and drop the obsession entirely.

Chaos, and all this got kicked off because I learned about Alicia Online, a fully free horse MMO that I can’t play on my computer cuz it’s a Mac, but could totally ask to install on and borrow one of my partners’. I’m very smooth.

And all of this, and I’m over here like, “Damn. I wish I could be a horse trainer.”

#star stable #star stable online #sso #games #mmo #mmorpg #what am i doing with my time #horse video game

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