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jaeclerc · 11 months

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Baby Come Home // Charles/Daniel // 2.6K

tw: ableism towards a deaf character

Charles isn’t too sure when he first met Daniel, he has just always been there, like the shine in his maman’s eyes or the slight dip on the third step of the staircase leading upstairs. He can’t remember when he first noticed him, but he can remember the first time Daniel actually looked back at him and noticed him.

He was 6, staring up the stairs of their house as he watched Jules, Enzo, and Daniel bounce up to the top level, a frown on his lips. They thought they were so grown up, at their ripe age of 8. Maybe they were, Charles didn’t know. He was only 6. But, he desperately wanted to play with them and he signaled that with incessantly flashing the lights so Lorenzo would look at him so he could sign. Their mother was hunting down the new pack of batteries for Charles’ cochlear's and had been for the last hour.

“I want to play!” He signed to Enzo when he finally looked at him, rolling his eyes at Charles. “Please Enzo.”

Charles wasn’t that good at lip reading so when Daniel said something to him, he couldn’t quite understand, his face scrunching as he signed to Enzo.

“What?” He demanded, looking between both his brother and his cousin.

“Nothing, Charlie.” Jules signed back to him, before he turned to Daniel and gestured, presumably explaining that Charles was Deaf and couldn’t hear anything without his processors on. He also gestured to Enzo, pointing to his hearing aid on his left ear, probably explaining that all of them were on the deafness spectrum as best as an 8 year old could.

Daniel nodded, his head quirked to the side as he waved at Charles before turning to talk to Jules and Lorenzo.

“Daniel said he wants to play with you.” Jules automatically translated for him. Charles grinned and went to see if his Maman had found the batteries so he could actually talk to Daniel without missing every other word from his lips. He was trying hard to learn how to lip read in school but it was very hard and most of his family was at least to an intermediate level of ASL or LSF, so he didn’t have to use it at home.

Charles flickered the lights when he walked in the room, causing his Maman to look up as he signed “Did you find them?”

His maman gestured to the counter where his processors were laying on the counter, signing back that she had. He waited for her to help him put them back on him, smiling as they turned on and he could hear the world around him again.

He ran off to find Daniel to show him that his ears worked again. Kinda. Jules told him that his hearing ear and his Cochlear sounded a little different but Charles knew no difference, having always only heard through his devices.

The first time Charles really realized just how much Daniel meant to him, he was 14.

He was sitting at the lunch table with Enzo, Jules, and Daniel, fiddling with his processors. The noise in high school was a lot, even two weeks into the transition from his Deaf focused middle school into mainstream high school. His English skills were advanced, he could speak well, and he had no problems with focusing in a normal classroom, but the cafeteria was a different story. Thousands of voices and sounds came crashing over him all at the same time and he wasn’t used to it.

“Charles.” Enzo scolded when he saw him playing with the device. “Don’t break it again. Just take them off for the moment if you’re really that bothered.” Charles rolled his eyes at him but detached the magnets, making everything go silent around them as he looked at all of them. Charles started eating his lunch, chatting with Enzo and Jules as Daniel vocally spoke to them. They both took turns interpreting for him, but Daniel had spent years with them all. His own hands reflexively clumsily signing the main points of what he was saying, just fragments of what he was talking about, half formed but still clear enough for Charles to understand whatever he was wishing to express to all of them. Charles could lip read well, but he appreciated not having to focus on mouths.

Charles was struck by how fond he was of Daniel. He was hearing, raised in a hearing household, but he still tried for all of them in their native language, picking up their language and using it to communicate with them, especially Charles who relied a little more heavily on sign as he was born with profound Deafness, while Jules and Enzo were both only fully effected in one ear.

It struck him with a sudden quickness, how much he liked Daniel.

“Daniel.” He signed “You need to learn how to sign with both hands, you look like you’re speaking only halfway.” He giggled at the look on his face, smiling at the older boy as he picked at his school issued tater tots.

Daniel waved to get Charles’ attention once again and used both hands to sign to him.

“Enrolled. Class. Learn.” He said, and Charles nodded.

“Good. Because you can understand well but your signing is…not so good. Sorry.” Jules and Lorenzo both nodded their agreement, Jules turning slightly to speak to him.

“Charles is just picky. He grew up spoiled with everyone knowing sign so he never had to suffer through the well wishers who thought they were fluent. At least you try, but he is right. You really do suck at ASL.” Daniel gasped in mock offense, causing Charles to laugh again, flushing when people looked at him. He assumed he was being loud, but nobody at his table turned to shush him, so he just continued.

He nudged Jules, signing “You’re just jealous that Maman and Uncle said that I sign LSF better than you.”

Jules shook his head before saying “Bell.” and gesturing up to indicate to Charles that lunch time was over. He made sure to connect his transmitters again, cringing slightly at the cascade of sound as he gathered his things to dump them.

He felt a nudge and looked up to see Daniel, replying vocally when he asked “Ear?”

“Yes, I always put them back in after lunch, Though, I wish I could get away with not. Mr. Pross always breathes so loud into my microphone and has it pressed way too close to his mouth.” He shutters, and Daniel cackles. They had the same math class, so they walked together, pushing through the crowded halls.

Charles felt so cool walking with Daniel who was extraordinarily more popular than him. He smiled at Daniel as he cracked jokes, trying to only focus on his voice when someone bumped into him, slightly hard, jostling the hand Charles had reached up to push his magnet under his hair, causing his device to fall on the ground.

The culprit didn’t even stop to apologize as Charles bent down to pick his transmitter, trying to see if it was broken from the person stepping on it. He prayed it wasn’t, his parents had just bought him new racing red ones that he knew were not cheap. But, when he picked it up, he saw that the magnet was now detached and he frowned even harder.

“Hey!” Daniel called down the hallway, walking after the person who had jostled Charles. “Hey, you!” He caught up to them. It was that guy who had been taunting Charles, the guy from his Advanced French class that had asked why he was there if he was “SPED”.

“I’m just Deaf?” Charles replied in confusion.

“Wow! I didn’t know you knew how to speak.” was all he said, causing Charles to wrinkle his nose and look away.

“Why didn’t you apologize to him for bumping into him?” He demanded, glaring the boy down.

“Daniel.” He signed “It’s fine!”

“No, it isn’t, Charlie.” Daniel replied. He turned back to the boy, who had introduced himself as Zach on their first day if Charles could recall correctly.

“Danny, c’mon.” Zach chidded “He obviously said it’s okay.” He mocked Charles signing, and Charles flushed, embarrassed that this was happening in front of Daniel.

“Don’t mock him. Just because you barely know more than English doesn’t mean you get to mock him. You broke his fucking device. Imagine someone just walking over your precious phone. Say sorry.” Daniel snarled. Charles grabbed his wrist, shaking his head.

“Who cares? I’m sure he can make some sob story and get it covered.” Daniel shook off Charles’ hand and snatched Zach’s phone, chucking it over the railing of the level they were standing on, watching it clatter and shatter on the laminate floor below them.

“Let’s go.” Was all Daniel had to say, letting go of Zach and steering Charles away to their math class, leaving everyone there to gawk at them.

Charles’ parents were furious when they heard what happened, Daniel got suspended for 2 days, and Charles was pretty sure he was in love with Daniel when it was all said and done.

Charles took off his transmitters at 19. He was sick of the world demanding him to conform to their expectations of him. Demanding him to mold himself into a hearing person when he was not. He was Deaf.

“I understand.” His maman signed to him when he told her he was doing it. “It’s hard in this world. Your papa and I just wanted to give you the best accessibility that we could, but it has always been your choice. When you were about 3, you refused to wear them out for months and all our hearing friends would ask why we would let you do that. As if denying you the ability to be comfortable is the better choice. You can put them back whenever you want. If you want.” She kissed his forehead as he leaned against her, closing his eyes.

When he told Daniel, signing to him over FaceTime so the other man could practice his interpretation skills with him, he nodded.

“Good. You always seemed so uncomfortable with them on.” Charles beamed at him. Daniel always got him, above anyone else. He understood Charles more than anyone else in his life. He got all of Charles’ weird idiosyncrasies and appreciated them with so much reverence, it made Charles’ heart nearly beat out of his chest.

Charles was so in love with him, it made him almost feel sick with how struck he was by the other man.

“How are your classes?” He signed to Charles, capturing his attention again.

“So exhausting! You do not understand how tired I am of having to explain why I have my interpreter there and that she’s allowed everywhere I am. Soooo many people demanding to know why I don’t have hearing aids! Do they not understand the concept of being Deaf?” Charles rolled his eyes as he dramatically signed, exasperated.

He loved being Deaf, he was extremely proud to have grown up in a Deaf family, surrounded by not only his Monegasque culture, but also his Deaf culture, but it was not easy being Deaf in a world that was built for hearing people. Especially when people saw being Deaf as some sort of shortcoming, expecting him to do whatever to make them more comfortable with his Deafness, even if it meant sacrificing his own comfort and happiness. Charles was so tired of it, he spent years wearing his transmitters and dealing with how much he hated it just to fit in. He was sick of it.

He wanted to be comfortable and happy, he was born without his hearing and he liked it that way.

“I’m sorry, cherry.” Daniel shook his head, before turning his head to look at someone off cam. Charles couldn’t read his lips to even get an idea of what he was saying, annoyed that someone else was trying to take Daniel’s attention.

Daniel signaled the other person away and turned back to Charles, saying “Sorry, my roommate was wondering who I was talking to. He wants to go out to a party tonight.”

Charles pointed to his lips, raising his eyebrows as Daniel laughed and translated himself to Charles, causing the other to giggle.

“Are you going to go?” He asked, a bit sad but trying to keep it under wraps. The downside to being Deaf was that he was so used to keeping open and candid body language that it was hard to hide, even when he schooled his face.

“If you don’t want me to, I won’t. I wanna talk to you and we haven’t really spoken much since you started class.” Daniel expressed to him,

Charles frowned, shaking his head, trying to emphasize as he said “No, you should! I don’t want to keep you from having fun.” Even though all he wanted to do was talk to Daniel. More than anything.

Daniel signed “Love you.” which caused Charles to smile, his eyes wrinkling and his dimples popping out as he signed it back and hung up, sighing softly as he looked at himself in his phone’s reflection. He felt pathetic with how much he adored Daniel.

Charles was 20 when he got scouted by AR Models. He was 20 when his whole world changed. He was also 20 when he completely went publicly non-verbal, refusing to use his voice when he had his sign and anyone who was actually worth his time allowed him to use his interpreter.

When he told Daniel, FaceTiming him in excitement, too excited to even use the minimal words he usually did use with the other man, instead rapidly signing to him in LFS, which Daniel was hardly intermediate in.

“Charles!” Daniel signed back. “I do not know what you are saying, I don’t know LSF that well, darling.” Charles blushed, laughing a little as he simply spoke out loud to him.

Charles rarely ever spoke in public, but he would happily use his voice with Daniel, even if his volume control was hard to gauge.

“I got signed. I got signed to a modeling agency. I-” he went back to sign, English was too hard for him to express himself when he was this excited. “I got signed to be a model, Daniel. With a real fucking agency.”

The way Daniel’s face dropped made Charles’ heart ache in a way he never knew it could, the feeling nearly choking him out.

“That’s really good, cherry.” Was all he signed back and Charles was confused. Not only by how sad Daniel’s body language seemed, but by the way he wasn’t even smiling at Charles, his dark eyes looking conflicted as Charles watched him.

“I-are you not happy about it?” Charles asked, and Daniel only bit his lip, looking like he was about to sigh, but Charles couldn’t tell, he could never really tell through the phone. He cocked his head as he stared at Daniel on screen and he sighed as well, feeling the slight vibration in his throat.

Charles propped his phone on a window seal, too excited to tell Daniel about his new contract that he hadn’t even left the agency building before calling him. He stared at Daniel before going to talk, the other man obviously not going to respond to him.

“I don’t know what is wrong, but I wish you would tell me. I don’t even know-This is a dream come true for me, you know this. So I am confused why you look like a kicked dog.” Daniel frowned, his eyebrows furrowing but Charles was on a roll, already ranting, his signing getting more and more mixed up between ASL and LSF. He could not understand why Daniel wouldn’t be happy for him.

“Charles.” Daniel signed. “I am so happy for you. That’s all. I’m happy for you.” and then he hung up and Charles was left in the lobby of his new agency, phone disconnected and tears in his eyes.

Charles was 24 and drunk when he saw Daniel for the first time in 3 years. In some gay bar in New York City of all places, kissing another guy. Charles didn’t know his heart could break all over again, but here it was, shards in his hands in the middle of a neon lit dance bar.

Daniel looked up and spotted him, and then looked away. Charles wanted to fucking throw up all the espresso martinis he had just drank, and he turned away, smiling at the guy he was with. Who cared what Daniel thought anyway?

Charles wished he didn’t.

#charles leclerc #daniel ricciardo #jules bianchi #charles/daniel #there’s no ship name idk…#model charles au #author is HoH #there IS a part 2 just like lmk if u wanna see her!#f1 fic rec #f1 fic

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