And I can bear it all,
I can turn my back on it all,
His anger,
His pride,
His torrential rage,
Even his apathy,
All the while admitting it hurts, but
Mama,
Oh, mama
I cannot bear his tears.
No one told me acceptance came with tears.
So when they slipped out of his eyes,
So gently he didn’t even blink,
I had no rehearsed response to protect me from myself.
Medicine taught me compassion, it did not
Teach me how to love.
Pulling the fingers of my hand away from his cheek
My past is screaming for her overturned sacrifices.
His shoulders,
His broad back, unshakable
Racked with tremors,
Convulsing sobs,
I’ll haunt myself until the day I die.
Rocking back and forth as if stifling madness,
And when I couldn’t anymore,
Tightly covered my mouth and screamed into my hands.
It might have felt better to cut my chest out.
Short of breath I used what I had to beg over and over
The only way I knew
Allahumma inni as’aluka al’afiyah,
O Allah I ask you for afiyah,
Please make this easy for me.
I beg of you make this easy for me.
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I agree with a lot of what's been said about the pacing (namely that this already great season could have been even better with an extra beat between eps 5 & 6, and likely another between 7 & 8) but I just want to take a second to remember what a fucking accomplishment this season is.
Like, just off the top of my head: they managed to expand the world-building of the show's pirate universe, add compelling new characters, deepen the central relationship in a genuinely complex and nuanced way with rich character arcs for both, at least suggest at greater complexity and emotional development for many of the background characters, and produce more expansive and technically challenging visuals including some very impressive action and crowd sequences. And they did all that with two fewer episodes, while still maintaining the original tone of the show and keeping run times under 30 minutes apiece.
It's not perfect, and they're not equally successful on all fronts, but it is extremely fucking good, and the fact that it gets anywhere close within those limitations is frankly an astounding artistic achievement
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I find viewers' lack of understanding of Day's anger towards Night very interesting.
There seems to be a very black and white line drawn from some people of:
If Night is the direct cause for Day's blindness, then Day's anger is justified.
Vs
The post episode 9 belief that: it WAS an accident, and therefore Day's anger is not justified.
So I thought I'd simplify part of the motivation behind Days animosity towards his brother with some handy visual aids :))
Every episode leading up to the most recent one has told us as viewers time and time again, that Day does not want to be pitied, that he doesn't want to be treated differently.
He makes it very clear that he is aware the crash was an accident.
And if we set aside the extra layer of him feeling like his place as 'the good son' has been taken, then what we have left is this:
Night was not a doting, responsible older brother previously.
(That's not to say he's a bad person, the nuances to why he was this way is a different post entirely)
His shift to being mature and responsible IS a result of Day going blind.
While Night's change is completely understandable, it doesn't take away from the fact that, for Day it's a constant exposure to the one thing he said he fears from people. The thing that kept him hidden in his room and ignoring his friends for a year.
Your kindness is pity.
You never acted like a good older brother before.
Your actions say: I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm sorry for you.
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it's the day before my birthday, and my girlfriend surprised me with an outing to a local bird aviary/botanic gardens in the mountains!!!
this was an absolute delight for me, known bird enjoyer, and i got to have many cute and phenomenal birds perched on my head (which i loved and plushie magolor 'tolerated', on account of it being my birthday). i even got to see a nicobar pigeon, which i had never seen in person before!
they also surprised me with an early birthday present to use at the incredible mountain-top picnic spread my gf planned (😭😭) of this extraordinarily cute kirby themed liquid-glitter cup!!
and of course, in true starflung fashion i injured myself twice
once, not three minutes into the outing when my umbrella (which i only require because i'm allergic to both the sun and sunscreen) bit me, and my gf had to run to reception to get me a bandaid. later, when i just totally fkn stacked it on some loose gravel on a slope and i got the umbrella back by slamming it into the ground, along with my knees and one palm. but not the other palm, which was holding plushie magolor, who touched neither gravel nor dirt and never will while i still breathe!
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*very very very heavy sigh*
*opens a Word doc to angrily write a Barnaby x Sans fanfic*
god gives the toughest battles to her weakest soldiers. its me im soldiers
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grimmjow doesn’t really strike me as the kind of person who says I love you out loud, ever. partly because there’s a vulnerability to it that he can’t stomach and partly because he doesn’t put a lot of stock in words anymore. like, Ichigo’s promise during their fight, he doesn’t actually try to capitalize on it in canon, not really. maybe if they’d crossed paths before TYBW but who knows? point being he’s very much an actions speak louder than words person and when he and ichigo do get together (slow burn from hell as always) he just… doesn’t say it. but ichigo figures it out from the little things. and it’s not grimmjow being overly protective — he’ll shove Ichigo into the nearest nosy hollow and laugh if it tries taking a bite out of him because he’s well aware Ichigo’s in no danger — but it’s grimmjow sitting with him after a nightmare, a silent but sturdy rock for Ichigo to cling to until he calms down. it’s grimmjow putting the claws away around his sisters and letting yuzu boss him around in the kitchen. it’s grimmjow never looking more satisfied than he does when they clash swords, wild and fierce and hungry for whatever Ichigo can throw at him. grimmjow never says it but Ichigo knows how much he’s loved because grimmjow always comes back.
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where’s that little horror piece about kits never growing up in Starclan? because I remember it so vividly but I can’t find it.
The one about Bright Stream?
Weird that it's so hard to find! It's probably because it's got such heavy tags lmao.
I really mean it though like, canon's permakitten system and the idea that Bright Stream is up there, forever taking care of fetus children who were filled by sudden knowledge and yet never grow past that point absolutely horrifies me. Jesus Christ. I don't know how anyone reads that final scene in Path of Stars and isn't filled with itching, white-hot existential dread, man.
Sometimes you just gotta write horror about it. ¯\_(ツ)_/¯
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I WANT SOMEONE TO LOVE ME. I want someone to casually sit beside me and nudge me every now and then to get my attention. I want someone to pull me into a side-hug because they've been laughing about a joke of someone and want to share that joy with me. I want someone to carefully take my hand into theirs and look at my fingers or perhaps the lines on my hand just because they can. I want someone to look at me absentmindedly while they're thinking of something. I want someone to sit quietly beside me when I'm feeling down and just take my hand and squeeze it to tell me I'm not alone anymore.
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My mother refuses to watch any of the videos coming out of Palestine, and she refuses to read the details of the horrors happening there.
I tell her she has to - people are being slaughtered, we cannot look away even for a moment. She says she can't handle it. She says she'll break down, and then she'll be of no use to anybody.
Today she managed to raise £700 for Medical Aid Palestine, while I was too busy crying.
Maybe my mum still knows best.
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