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#that photo is straight tragic god
compacflt · 1 year
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idk if we’ve already discussed this on Here and i missed it but this is allegedly canonically mav’s drivers license
lives in San Fran, or at least did in 1981
5’ 9” (yeah right)
no DOB AND he didn’t sign it
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evilminji · 3 months
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"DO BETTER!" Says Now Televised Fanboy
He, Dash Baxter is a Phan-Stan!! It's kinda his thing. See, he's a fancy ass talk show host now. Married Paulie, moved out of Amity, actually DID something with his life. His parents? Did not approve. Long n short of it? He got kicked out.
Paulie's parents were PISSED.
Retaliated by giving him all the help he needed getting EVERY scholarship he qualified for. He went to a really nice college. Missed his girlfriend like mad. But she was off in Metropolis, terrifying weaker men. Conquering the fashion scene.
And SOMEHOW? Thanks to that long talk he had with Phantom (*incoherent fanboy gibbering noises* SO COOL!) he's worked to be... more of a LEADER, you know? Less of an asshole. Cause he's popular. People copy him. He can't be an asshole.
So, somehow, when he's punching out some try-hard that thinks he's hot shit for bullying a Nerd? He and the nerd get talking, right? Cause the guy got his glasses completely fucked up. And it's what Phantom would do.
But GET THIS? Guy's never HEARD of Phantom! Is super curious, cause he runs a small time Hero's show on the web. And, Dude? Is it your LUCKY DAY! Cause you just met THE number 1 fan of Phantom, hands down!! He makes his VERY spirited case, about why Phantom is THE best Hero to ever have lived. And this guy?
Entranced.
In AWE.
Just straight up BEGS him to join his show. Cause apparently? He was BORN for it. Which? Yeah. He HAS been giving speechs to the team for YEARS now. And Talking at fan meet ups. Leading fan meet ups. Hosting parties... actually, now that he thinks about it? He DOES do a lot of public speaking? Huh.
But still, he's about to say "no", when?
Dude mentions? He'll get to talk about Phantom.
SOLD!
It. Blows. Up. Absolutely EVERYONE is in love with his pretty face, hot bod, and STRONG opinions. But they ALSO have no idea who Phantom is! Paulie! This is CRIMINAL! Horrifying! What is going ON!?
Some bullshit information black out, apparently. At least according to her... friendly Nemesis? The Goth Dweeb. Who's engaged, apparently? So good for her. Unsurprisingly, it's too the OTHER Dweebs, but still. Bout time she started planning to drag them to a court house. She's the only one with any spine in that group! If she waited for THEM to propose?
Not even as Ghosts, man.
They'd get distracted by shiny nerd shit and whimp out.
Still... a world where NO ONE knows how Awesome, Phantom is? Not on HIS watch!
So he works it in. To every segment. It becomes "his thing". Oh? Super man saved a kitten from a tree? Cute. Well PHANTOM saved a bus full of Ghost Puppies from a shady, rouge, Goverment agency. Do BETTER, Superman!
The Flash, who is a cheap knock-off and stole his name, took down an Ice Villian? Adorable! PHANTOM stopped a Rouge WINTER SPIRIT with the help of YETI WARRIORS then assisted in giving FREE medical care for anyone who needed it! Here's a picture of him making GHOST ICE SNOWMEN for small children! Do BETTER, Knock-off!
What's THAT you say? Wonder Woman fought a GOD in down town paris?
Excellent work Wonder Woman. Flawless as always. But YOU, god-boy, are a disappointment! All that power! And WHAT do you use it for? Are you even supposed to BE here?? PHANTOM uses his power to HELP people! Is awesome and knows TONS of better gods! You're just salty you didn't make the cut!
DO BETTER!
And obviously? No one believes him. There's no record of this "Phantom" guy. The pictures look fantastical and vaguely glitchy/glowy. Not quite right. They GOTTA be photo shopped. Manipulated somehow. But? As a shtick? A fake "perfect Superhero" is kinda funny and unique.
And it's one hell of Fake Hero!
A Dead Champion? Who fights gods and monsters? Rouge agencies? Sassy and tragic? With a mysterious past? Pretty cool! There's even an Offical Comic from some guy that went to the same high-school as Baxter!
Of course, as Baxter get more and more popular? The "meme" hero, Phantom, get more well known? People get more interested in where Dash grew up. You know, just a bored Google. Maybe see if the hero was based off a local legend or something. But... huh...
The Town website?
Weirdly? Sanitized.
Like... like aggressively sanitized. All smooth edges and no details. Very "move along, citizen". Ha ha... it's part of the joke right? They get it! They'll just look up local restaurants or som-....
Wait...
Hey, guuuuys?
Are you finding ANYTHING?
And! Nothing. And I do mean NOTHING! Triggers the "oh? Secrets???" Instincts of a Hacker, like finding a hard blank wall of "KEEP OUT". Especially when it's somewhere it rightfully shouldn't BE.
All it would take? Is ONE person, of decent skills and an account on Certain Forums, getting bored enough to Google the Dude On The TV(TM)? For the GIW's lil walls to come crashing down. Because yeah, you can stop ONE hacker. Even two. Probably five or six.
But how about thousands?
Hundreds of thousands?
From every time zone. Competing. Just to see what you HAVE and don't want them to see. Maybe they do something with it, maybe they don't. But fuck it, you're being RUDE and now they're CURIOUS. And THEN? Oh. Oh holy shit.
Not a meme.
Very real.
Not a joke.
The walls come crumbling down, down, down. Ripped apart by hundreds of hands. Emails sent to every sort of agency. The JLU line inundated with emergency tips. Not a joke. Not A Joke. Holy Shit, IT WASN'T A JOKE!
Phantom is REAL!
And there, on TV, stands the Man. The signal FINALLY breaching containment. Fighting off the invading God of the week. Built like statue, hair like an aurora borealis of white fire held almost delicately in place by a CROWN of ice, a suit made of void and starlight. Inhuman. Beyond human.
Here to help.
A laugh that crackles like ice and the snap of winter, rolls through the air like coming storms, rich and somehow warm. A smile that bares teeth, yet turns so KIND when he looks upon humanity, as though we are precious and worth fighting for. A living star.
A... a once living star.
And in the center of it all? Wearing his BESPOKE, custome made, Number 1 Phan full body outfit? That's right. Dash Baxter. Ha! You fuckers doubted him! Behold his blorbo and WEEP, ya fuckin casuals! The BESTEST of boys! The FINEST of Heros! Superman? Could NEVER.
And now? The weather!
@babbling-babull @nerdpoe @the-witchhunter @ailithnight @hypewinter @hdgnj @mutable-manifestation
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earthtoharlow · 7 months
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Teach Me: Teen Spirit
SERIES MASTERLIST
Part 2 of Teen Idle
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Two weeks. It’s been two weeks since Jayla has spent more than a few minutes at her house. She’d been staying in the guest room at her Uncle Urban’s house, Nova was at cheer practice so she was there alone. 
To be honest she was embarrassed. She couldn’t believe that she said that. She had apologized to her dad earlier in the week but she was sure Ariel would never forgive her. 
As she was laying on the bed, doing homework she heard a knock on the door. The door opens and her uncle Urban, pops his head in.
“Whatcha doing my favorite delinquent?” Urban said with a smirk.
Jayla tried to hide her smile at the joke. “HA HA HA, very funny.” She replies sarcastically as Urban walks in and sits beside her on the bed. 
“As much as I love having you here, when are you going home?” Urban asked his god daughter.
Jayla sighed and pouted “I’ve been disowned, I’m sure.”
Urban shook his head at her. “Stop, you haven’t been disowned. Your mother and father love you to death, they were just worried about you that night as any parent would.”
She nodded knowing he was right, there were a lot of things she should’ve done differently that night. 
“You know you really broke Ariel’s heart that night right?” 
She nodded her head again, afraid to speak. “You’re saying yes but I really don’t think you understand.”
Jayla looked at her uncle confused. She knows what she said was horrible and wrong.
“Ariel really doesn’t get enough credit for everything she’s done for not only you but your father.” Urban continued. “You were young when she came into the picture so you don’t have many memories of how your dad was before she was around.”
She listened intently to what Urban was saying. “What do you mean?”
“Your dad was heavily depressed after your birth mother passed. He was one of music's rising hip hop stars before he decided to leave it all behind. He essentially became a hermit. Jack decided to put all his attention into being the best father he could be, but he wasn’t happy.”
Jayla started feeling emotional hearing that she had no idea. She remembers her dad always smiling and her childhood was full of good memories.
“But when Ariel came into the picture, it was like Jack was seeing the world in color for the first time.It was like she brought him back to life. Not only did she brighten up his world but she brightened up yours too..It was almost like she was too good to be true. You didn’t know it at the time, your father didn’t even know it but you really needed a womanly figure in your life.”
She could agree to that, one of her very first memories of Ariel was opening up to her then first grade teacher about her losing her mother. A tragic experience that they both shared.
“She joined this little family with an open heart and never thought twice about it. So saying that she’s not your real mom is not only inaccurate but wrong.”
Jayla immediately started crying, hands pressed against her face. She could feel her Uncle pull her into his chest for a hug. She began to speak through her sobs. “Urb, she’s never going to forgive me! I don’t know how to fix this, she probably hates me!” 
“Hey hey, stop that!” Urban said, trying to calm her down. “I don’t want to hear any of that nonsense. Yes, she might be upset but she’s never stopped loving you and never will.” 
She sniffled and wiped the tears that were still falling down her cheeks. “What do I do now, how do I even begin fixing this?”
“You’re going to wipe your tears, then put on your big girl pants and apologize.”
***
Jayla ran into the house and went straight to the kitchen where her mom usually was after work. Frowning when she wasn’t there, she quickly ran out the kitchen and into the living room, stopping in her tracks when she saw her dad sitting on the couch. 
“Hey, daddy.” She said as he glanced up at her.
He patted the seat next to him, his frames falling down his nose as he continued flipping through the photo album in his lap. As Jayla sat next to him she smiled seeing her dad and uncle as teens and young adults. There was even a full page dedicated to her birth mom. 
Jayla motioned her dad to stop flipping when she saw a photo she’d never seen before of herself and Ariel. It looked like they were in Aspen. What made her smile was the happy expression on their faces. She missed Ariel. She missed her mom.
“That’s one of my favorite photos of you two together,” Jack said when he noticed his daughter looking at the picture. 
Jayla continued to look at the photos from that trip. “Why’s that?”
“Urban took that photo seconds after you had just called her mom for the first time.” 
Jayla gasped at the admission. That explains how happy the two of them looked in the frame.
“Your mom and I had been together for almost a year when we decided to take this trip during winter break. For months you had been going back and forth on what to call her. We never pressured nor rushed, wanting you to make that decision yourself.”
Jayla nodded as Jack continued.
“You had just gone down this huge slope by yourself, the whole weekend you had been practicing with either me or your mom going down with us holding your hands. I can still hear the excitement in your voice as you squealed “I’m doing it mommy, look!” It took her a couple seconds to even realize what you had said, until you reached the bottom and said it again. I don’t think I’d have ever seen her that happy at that moment.”
Jayla had a lot of apologizing to do. She broke her mothers heart that day, saying something that wasn’t true out of anger. 
“Dad, can you drop me off at the school?”
***
Ariel sighed as she made her way back to her classroom. It’s been a rough couple of weeks. Every time she had a moment to herself the only thing that replayed in her head was Jayla’s words. 
“but you aren’t even my real mom.”
While she knew that Jayla said those words out of anger, it still didn’t make it hurt less. She had never heard Jayla speak in that manner before. It scared her. She couldn’t help but overthink, what if Jayla actually meant what she said? Technically, she wasn’t wrong.
As she got closer to the classroom she noticed the door was left open. She definitely remembered closing it, when she walked inside the first thing she noticed was a head of curly hair sitting in the reading corner, face pressed into a book. She immediately knew who it was. 
“You know, I remember these pillows being a lot more comfortable when I was younger.” They spoke first. Ariel said nothing as she walked over and leaned against the front of her desk, hands crossed in front of her. 
She continued when Ariel stayed silent just watching. “It’s really trippy being in the classroom again, I don’t think I’ve been in here since I left elementary.” Ariel continued to watch her ramble, she was truly her fathers child. 
As she began to speak again, Ariel finally stopped her. “Jayla, what are you doing here?”
Jayla immediately pouted. “I came here to say I miss you…and apologize.”
“Hm.”
Jayla bit her lip nervously. “Mom, please just hear me out.”
Ariel laughed a little under her breath. “Oh? So now I’m your mom?”
Jayla frowned and nodded. She deserved that. “That’s the thing, you’ve always been my mom. Even before it was legally changed.”
She kept going. That was one thing she loved about her. She always lets her get her thoughts out uninterrupted. 
“You’ve brought so much love and happiness into dad and I’s life. There was never a time where I was unsure about you being in my life. You never felt like a replacement mom either. I loved you the first day I saw you. I looked up to you, you’re just as cool now as when we first met, if not more.”
Jayla was starting to get emotional and so was Ariel as she continued to speak. “Through the years you've done so much for me. So much so that I can't imagine what my life would be like if you wouldn't have walked into it.”
She started fumbling with her necklace again nervously. “I’m saying all this to say that I’m sorry. So so sorry, mom. I’ll forever regret what I said that night. This isn’t going to fix everything but I’ll do whatever I can to make this right by you.”
It was quiet for what almost felt like hours, even though it was only a few seconds.
“Well, you can start by getting your things from Urban’s house and coming home. Oh and giving your mother a hug.” Ariel said with a smile which grew wider as Jayla leaped up from her spot on the floor and gave her a huge hug. 
Ariel could feel her blouse getting wet from Jayla’s tears. She shushed her, giving her a kiss on the head. “It’s okay, it’s okay.”
“I’m so sorry. I thought you hated me.”
“Hey, look at me.”
Ariel waited for Jayla to get herself together and look at her before speaking again. 
“I could never hate you. NEVER. Do you understand me? You’re my first daughter, you made me a mother. It doesn’t matter that you didn’t come from my stomach. I see so much of myself in you. You couldn’t be more mine.” Ariel told her sincerely. 
Jayla nodded before pulling away.
"I love you, mom."
"I love you too, Jay"
***
AN: HIIIIIII I JUST HIT 1K THANK YOU ALL SO MUCH FOR LOVING AND READING MY WORK!!
Hope you all enjoyed this let me know your throughts :)
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brakingpoint · 1 year
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breaking away from my commitment to not being a tinhat blog to briefly give my 2 cents on which drivers i think are gay/bi
max: bisexual but will never fully consciously realise due to his desperation to settle down into a white picket fence 2.5 kids and 2 cats marriage with kelly. perhaps, subconsciously, that is why he is so quick to settle. so his cock does not have time to wander
checo: cheats like a straight man. will kiss the homies after a beer or two but always remembers to say no homo because gay activities aren't very catholic
charles: i know he's Not French but he's gay in a french way, where if you don't have a deeply tragic homoerotic bond at least once in your life they revoke your citizenship but it doesn't actually count as being gay
george: things i did not learn at oxford - proper orchestration technique, anything about non-brazilian hip hop, the different types of augmented sixths. things i DID learn at oxford: george russell would lick his best mate's nipples at the bullingdon club party for the photo op but he would staunchly refuse to identify as anything other than straight
lewis: on the one hand i think he is actually genuinely gay or bi and will come out publicly within the next five years. on the other hand only the worst kind of straight man could have done that to nicole scherzinger's boob
carlos: he's not gay but he IS in a deep long term open relationship with lando
lando: see above. also i used to watch dan and phil and i see no other explanation for whatever the situation is with him and max fewtrell. he's bisexual i know it in my soul
esteban: god love him but that is a heterosexual man. a charmingly sexless one but a heterosexual nonetheless
fernando: will fuck other men as an intimidation tactic only but he's never needed to resort to that because he's intimidating enough already
valtteri: not an iota of gayness in him. heterosexual wife guy. ass fixation easily explained away by being finnish
seb: BISEXUAL KING, NO OTHER COMMENT
daniel: he has successfully gaslit everybody into thinking he's bisexual due to his relentless flirtations with other men but it's all part of the brand. he has never, ever won a game of gay chicken
kevin: no.
pierre: once again, gay in a french way but ALSO gay in a gay chicken way with yuki and against all odds they both won like katniss and peeta in the hunger games
lance: despite his gay little voice everything about him and his ex has me confident that he not only fucks exclusively heterosexually, but he fucks WELL
mick: i think there's a lil sumn sumn there. i don't know if or when it will ever come to light. but i don't think he's one hundred percent committed to straighthood. maybe it's bisexual osmosis from having seb as a mentor
yuki: DOES identify as straight but also identifies as never ever losing a game of gay chicken so now he and pierre have been fucking nightly for approximately several months and it's getting increasingly romantic each time
zhou: remember when we all used to say metrosexual in the early 2000s to describe a straight man with the fashion and grooming sense of a gay man?
alex: he and lily absolutely have bi4bi energy in every aspect of their online posting and that is why they are thee superior formula one couple
nicky: straight but i could fix him
bonus 1 (nyck): a man that short has to adapt to maximise his dating pool. it's basic evolutionary theory or something idk i dropped biology after gcses
bonus 2 (hulk): no.
bonus 3 (nico rosberg): the most flagrantly bisexual individual i have ever seen in my life and i look in the mirror daily
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ellivenollivander · 10 months
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Okay, love, I’m almost on the Leander train. Give me some of your softest HCs about him. I loved your alphabet about him and I need more. 💛
Thank you so much for giving me a chance to talk about my #1 legacy boy, you know how much I love him. I hope you fall in love with him, too. Special thanks to @imagrindylow for being my emotional support and letting me bounce some ideas off of you. Love our shared Leander Prewett brain. Also thank you @skittish1807 for just, putting up with us honestly. I found the template I used for these to help guide me right here!
Leander Prewett Headcanons
How do they feel about people shorter/taller than them? He is like, annoyingly, tall and he loves to playfully tease his friends and s/o about this fact relentlessly. Like, if he has something they want he’ll dangle it above their head knowing they can’t reach it. 
What are they like on social media? (What’s their username, profile pic, etc.) He’s boring, his handle would truly just be leanderprewett. Profile picture would either be a candid photo his friend or s/o took of him.
Their sexuality? Everyone in the wizarding world is bi, sorry I don’t make the rules ¯\_(ツ)_/¯ However, if that wasn’t the case he would tragically be very straight.
Preferred weather? Blue skies & sunshine. He gets cabin fever very easily and hates being cooped up inside for too long.
What’s their sleeping schedule? He stays up way too late and loves to sleep in when he can. Lazy mornings are his favorite.
Favorite music? Rock, Pop Rock, Indie. He also has a soft spot for classical music and Jazz with his upbringing and family life. Oh, this song reminds me of him very very much.
How’s their cooking? I answered this a bit in my sfw alphabet, but he enjoys cooking. Specifically recipes he grew up with, made by his Mom.
It’s movie night, what movie do they pick? He’s a sucker for romcoms. and if his s/o wants to have a full self care face mask junk food movie night he’s all in. However, he’s also the guy who doesn’t shut up when watching a movie, full of commentary. “Did you know that actor didn’t even want to play this part?” “Gods that CGI is terrible”  “That coffee cup is clearly empty”
How would they hold up in a pillow war? He wouldn’t hold back, and there’s been legendary pillow wars in the Gryffindor dorms. Garreth has been the victim of more than a few smacks across his head from Leanders pillow.
What’s their sleeping position? CONTORTIONIST. LONG GANGLY LIMBS EVERYWHERE.
Who do they go to for comfort? When he was a kid, his grandpa. Then as he grows up, Garreth (they’re besties) and his s/o. It takes him a while to feel comfortable doing so, though and usually the other person notices something is bothering him before he speaks up. They usually have to be the ones to coax him into talking.
Something small that they enjoy?His moms home cooked meals, long walks by the black lake. Riding his broom. A good book.
How do they feel about physical contact by others? Eh. He’s alright with a hug now and again. When it comes to his s/o he’s anti PDA. He does love when his Mom gives him a cheek or forehead smooch.  What is enough to bring them to tears? Failure. In any form. He’s hypersensitive to it as his greatest fear in life is being perceived as a disappointment to his family. (See also: His boggart would be his father).
Biggest pet peeve?Serious pet peeve of his: people who are just willfully ignorant and unwavering in their belief systems. Less serious pet peeve: just… impolite behaviors. Chewing with your mouth open, not saying please/thank you, etc etc etc.
How well do they take care of themselves? Very very well and he prides himself on it. He’s a very clean, well put together person and he always smells good. (@imagrindylow and I even picked out a cologne we think he’d smell like - BOSS Infinite) 
What’s something they like that may be surprising to others?He enjoys the mundane. He finds joy and peace in a very calm, domestic life. He wants the 9-5 office job. He wants to be successful if only to appease his parents and provide for his family. But he wants an easy going, office job that keeps him safe and brings him home to his family every single night.
Do they consider others family? Oh yes. When he has children, all of his close friends will absolutely be considered Aunts and Uncles to them. He absolutely believes family goes beyond blood. Though, those titles and feelings don’t come easily for him and those select few would have to be tried and true friends to him, and the people he cares about. 
Any bad habits that they have? I answered this one a bit, in this post but really just crippling insecurity, overworking himself and jealousy. What’s their idea of a perfect vacation? Anywhere that would give him ample time to spend with and bond with those close to him. Quidditch World Cup with his brothers. Weekend at the lake with his partner and children. In the modern world he’d absolutely be an Amusement Park Dad or think a cross country road trip would be a great bonding experience. (He’s wrong. Everyone cries at least once.) 
Do they get lost easily? Will they ask for directions if they are? He would not get lost easily, the man is over prepared for everything. If he did find himself lost, he would not hesitate to find a local and ask for help. Especially if he had his s/o or children along. (CAN YOU TELL HE’S A FAMILY MAN?)
How well do they accept advice?It depends not only on how close he is with the person giving him advice but also the level of respect he has for them. If he respects the person immensely, he will absolutely accept their advice with gratitude.
How much do they swear?Often, just not loudly. He’ll curse under his breath during an exam or while he’s playing quidditch or summoners court but he’s not one to be dropping f bombs in casual conversation. He’s polite.
How do they take advice given to them?Feeding off of how well they take advice, he would absolutely act on it if he accepted it. Putting his trust in their guidance.
Do they like being in pictures?He doesn’t love having his picture taken alone, but he’ll never say no to capturing memories with people he loves. His desk at work would be absolutely littered in photos of his s/o and children and family.
Is there anything they’re bad at?Emotional regulation lmao boys got a temper.
What’s their morning schedule?As much as he loves to sleep in, he does have a morning routine that if he doesn’t get to complete it’ll put him in a funk for the rest of the day. So he does make sure he gets up with enough time to get it done. He makes his bed (literally every single day), showers, grooms himself (shaving, cologne, etc), he takes his time in getting ready for the day. Not to look good, but to feel good.
Any past injuries? He broke his leg after falling off his broom when he and his brothers were goofing off, when he was a kid. 
Something that disgusts them Runny eggs and the smell of incense (it gives him a headache, which is why he drops divination the second he’s able). 
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ash5monster01 · 1 month
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Goes On Chapter Nine
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Pairing: Charlie Dalton x OC!FemReader
Warnings: 18+, depression, mentions of suicide, heavy topics, eventual smut, slow burn romance, fluff, gender themes/stereotypes.
Summary: Against his best efforts Charlie has to start at a new preparatory school after the tragic events that took place at Welton. The very events that led to the loss of his best friend and getting expelled in the first place. He has no plans to make friends let alone get close to anyone ever again. That is until he meets Evelyn and her interesting group of friends. No matter how hard he tries to push them away he finds it to be impossible. So he caves and in the end learns that life can still be enjoyable even if it feels like everyone is against you.
word count: 3.2k
Eight ←→ Ten
Masterlist
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Ridge Academy, NY
2/14/60
It was completely surreal, Charlie thought as him and Nate walked into the school's gym. He had heard of school dances while he was in Welton, how they would dim the lights in the gym, a live band playing music a touch too loud, and kids actually have a good time while supervised. It sounded fake to him, especially because he couldn't picture Nolan watching him as he swung some girl around the dance floor. The longer he was at Ridge the more he realized it was more like public school than private, which may explain why it was more frowned upon than others. No one would take a private school seriously if they acted so much like a public one.
Yet Charlie didn't entirely mind. It was as if he had obtained the best of both worlds and even if he ended up here through a traumatic experience at least he was finally getting a chance to do all the things he fought for. He was a Ridge Reject and for the first time since he got here, he didn't really mind. So he walked into that gym, black dress pants, white button up, and red tie, ready to take it head on, and have the best night.
"Ev killed it again" Nate states matter of fact as he eyes the decorations her and Charlie had spent all yesterday putting up. Charlie remembered it looking cheesy and out of place, but now in the dark gym and flashing lights it looked as if professionally done.
"She really loves this stuff" Charlie said and Nate nodded, eyes wide as he spotted a balloon arch and photographer to take photos of all the Ridge couples on their happy night. He knew it wouldn't be long until he had to go through them for yearbook.
"Thank God you're here!" Evelyn says practically barrelling into Charlie. He catches her arms, eyeing her quickly. "I need someone to watch the punch bowl and Violet ripped her dress and is crying. I have to help!"
She's frantic, eyes wild, and stressed. Hence why she had mellowed out so much the night before. Yet Charlie can't register her words because in front of him the girl looks more beautiful than ever. Red dress vibrant against her tan skin, shoulders on display from the low hung fabric, cinched at the waist, and ruffle skirt flared to her knees. He almost feels his kness buckle when he spots her cherry red lips and brunette hair curled to perfection.
"Wow" is all that comes out and Evelyn is quick to whack him. He snaps out of it quickly.
"Please, just watch the punch bowl and I'll be back soon" she says and Charlie nods as the girl scurries off to go and help her friend.
"You can catch flies like that, I would know" Nate says with a pat to Charlies back before going off in search of his other friends. Charlie takes a moment for his mind to get back on track before going straight to the punchbowl just as he was told. Not without grabbing some for himself in hopes to help his dry throat just from looking at the girl. This was going to be a long night.
It’s not long until he sees Evelyn scurry back into the gym, Violet behind her now wearing a smile instead of tears. Charlie feels his throat dry all over again, especially when those dazzling eyes land on him and soften when they realize he’s exactly where he’s supposed to be. For the first time since meeting Evelyn he almost isn’t sure what to say as she approaches him in that God damn red dress.
“How’d it go?” she inquires, still not catching on the way Charlie is looking at her. Charlie takes a moment to even form a response.
“Fine, I guess. I don’t understand why a punch bowl needs to be monitored anyway” Charlie says, trying desperately hard to make sure his eyes don’t travel down the neckline of her dress and to the cleavage that’s on display.
“People spike it Charlie, it’s one of the most notorious things to ever happen to a punch bowl” Evelyn tells him, shock covering her features because she somehow forgets how sheltered the boy was in that school of his.
“And you left me in charge of it? If I had known I would’ve been the one to spike it myself” Charlie says and Evelyn laughs, bright red lips a stark contrast to her perfect white teeth. He wanted to kiss her so badly. Seeing how perfect she looked he almost felt silly for even thinking he had a chance to wrap his arm around her last night.
“Of course you would have been, normally it’s Marty but based on that hangover he’s still sporting I figure he has nothing left” Evelyn tells him, eyes glancing to the boy who stood across the gym with Nate and Violet on either side of him. The boys eyes are hooded, dark circles underneath them, and his smile never completely fills his face.
“You look beautiful by the way” Charlie suddenly says, eyes stuck on the girl. He no longer cares about the dance or anything around him. His only consistent thought was about her.
“Thank you, I worried it was too much” she says, eyes searching his own. Charlie watches as she covers her mouth slightly, feeling subconscious about the makeup that matches her dress. “I figured it was a 50/50 shot I’d look good or like a tomato”
“Not a tomato at all” Charlie says, practically a whisper as he reaches forward and brushes some of her chocolate curls behind her shoulder. The off the shoulder design of the dress has Charlie’s mouth watering, thoughts of what Evelyn would sound like as he kissed his away along that expanse of skin.
Falling nervous under his stare, Evelyn realizes how distracted Charlie is as he drinks her appearance in. His behavior had changed drastically in the last few days and for the first time she was becoming nervous around him. She had been the flirt and now she wasn’t and she didn’t know what to do with herself.
“Do you have spare lipstick on you?” Charlie asks, eyes glued to the perfect pouty lips of hers. Evelyn see how he doesn’t look away and fumbles for his small purse that holds the exact tube she had used earlier.
“Here” she says, sliding it into his hand and Charlie smiles. She watches as he releases the button on the end of his sleeve and slowly pushes it up his arm.
“This is an Indian Warrior symbol for virility” he tells her, popping the cap of the lipstick and dragging it across his wrist in a zig zag pattern. “It’s supposed to drive girls crazy, I call it getting red”
“And has this getting red bit worked before?” she asks, eyes cast along the red symbol on his wrist and Charlie smiles, knowing he made her nervous.
“I don’t know, but I hope I’m going to find out” he says ducking down, whispering the response in her ear, and Evelyn nearly shudders at the suggestion of it all.
“You’re trouble Charlie Dalton” she tells the boy, fingers curling in his sleeve as she pulls it back down over the red mark and buttoning it close. “But if you wanted my lipstick on you, you should’ve just asked”
Charlie finds himself at a loss of words as she says this and turns back to the punch table as if she did not just make the most suggestive comment he has ever received in his life. He doesn’t understand how she can act so normal, smiling as she hands off a fresh cup of punch to another student. Repeating the presidents in his head and picturing Nolan in his boxers is enough to calm him down and bring him back to reality as he joins her.
“Having fun?” Laurie appears, giggles falling past her lips and arms wrapped around Eli. She wears a purple dress much different from Evelyn’s, form fitting all the way down to her knees and either she hadn’t been busted yet or already received detention.
“It sure looks like you are” Evelyn tells her, passing a cup of punch to her. It’s then Charlie realizes the girl has most likely snuck a few drinks with the boy beside her and Evelyn is trying to sober her up.
“Looking good Charles, but have you taken a look at Evelyn?” Laurie grins at the boy and Charlie chuckles.
“Thanks, and trust me. I have and she’s ethereal” Evelyn’s heart flips at the sentiment and honesty in his words. All Laurie does is crack a grin at the girl because in all the years she had known her she had never dated anyone and now the guy she finally liked, liked her back.
“You two are cute, don’t work too hard” she says before pulling Eli back off onto the dance floor and leaving the two alone again. Charlie chuckles at Evelyn’s friend, the one who always seemed to be up to no good.
Soon the punch bowl is empty and after a quick fix to an incident with the photographer, Evelyn and Charlie both finally found themselves with nothing to do. Some of the guests had already fled out but Evelyn’s friends were still on the dance floor enjoying their night. Charlie didn’t miss the forlorn look on her face, the desire to be out there with them and not in charge of anyone or anything. At least Nate had found Amy, Charlie was unsure if he actually liked her or it was distraction from Evelyn. Either way she deserved to be out there with them.
“Do you want to dance?” He asks curiously and Evelyn glances up at him, hazel eyes shining brightly in the dimly lit gym.
“We have to monitor though” she begins to defend but Charlie shakes his head, hands circling around her arms and starting to guide her away from the table.
“The punch is empty, half the student body has left, the photographer is packed up, and you’re wearing a dress that deserves a real night out” Charlie assures her, hands sliding slowly down her bare arms until his fingers interlock with her own. He’s positive he could never get sick of the way he feels when he touches her.
“Is that was you call it, a night out?” She muses and Charlie rolls his eyes.
“Yes, even if we don’t have to leave the building to go to bed tonight. Plus I’ve never been to a school dance before, I need a professional to show me” he tells her and Evelyn giggles as they finally reach the spot beside her friends.
“Do you even know how to dance?” She curiously asks and Charlie shrugs, hands settling on her waist.
“I guess you’ll find out” he tells her and Evelyn giggles just as the band starts the next song, coincidentally a slow dance, and Charlie starts to sway her like he’s done it a hundred times before.
“I’ve never danced with anyone before” Evelyn sheepishly admits, glancing at her two girlfriends who whisper to both their dates about this unusual sight they’re seeing.
“If it makes you feel better the only person I ever have was with Meeks” Charlie tells her and Evelyn giggles lightly, trying not to become nervous under his stare.
“That would have been a sight to see” she tells him and Charlie shrugs, lifting her arms lightly that were wrapped around his neck.
“It was an etiquette class we were required to take at Weston. For a week we were taught the proper way to dine, hold business conversations, and dance. We were told it the sign of an intellectual man and the best way to woo a women while finding a future wife” Charlie tells her, recalling the week where Meeks has been subjected to being his dance partner, Neil got yelled at for using the wrong fork, and Knox sneezing while practicing proper conversation with Mr. McAllister.
“What, they couldn’t find any girls to volunteer?” Evelyn curiously asked, hands subconsciously playing with the hair at the back of Charlie’s neck. The action drying out his throat.
“More than likely Nolan decided they would be better off without any female volunteers especially if I was there. I have a tendency of not keeping my mouth shut” Charlie informs her and Evelyn grins, happy to know she was finally getting to know that Charlie even though Charlie was fairly positive he would never entirely come back.
"Evelyn, come quick. The balloon arch fell and is blocking the doors" a student came rushing over before she could pry further into Charlie's past. Coming back to reality she is quick to move into business mode but before she can fully panic Charlie has grabbed her face and turned her back to him.
"I'll handle it, I'm on planning commitee too. Spend some time with your friends" he tells her and her features instantly soften towards the boy. Charlie gives her a sweet smile before going off with the student in search of the balloon arch disaster of 1960. Evelyn watches him walk away until Nate appears at her side.
"Mind if I cut in?" he asks and Evelyn smiles and nods, stepping into the boys arms as the slow song continues. Nate tries his best to not feel sad towards the situation he's in. He had dreamed of taking Evelyn to a school dance since he was thirteen and the one time he finally gets the chance her heart lies with someone else, even if she's in his arms.
"You did a wonderful job, again" Nate tells her, nodding to the decorations and party around them.
"Thanks, I can't take all the credit this time though. Charlie helped a lot even if he didn't want to be on the commitee" she says, thankful he didn't bail on her like she thought he would once he realized her club was nothing but an easy credit.
"He's a good guy, as much as I hate to admit it" Nate says, eyes casting behind Evelyn where Charlie was lifting the balloon arch, helping students secure it back onto the wall.
"He's not what I expected, that's for sure" Evelyn says, head shaking as she looked down to her shoes and Nate took a deep breath. He had waited for this girl for so many years, wasted so much time, and in the end missed his chance. Yet during all of that time he got to know her, be friends with her, and even if things weren't going to turn out the way he always hoped, at the very least she should be happy. He could learn to move on. At least he might've finally gotten his very own friend out of the deal, one he didn't make because of her. Then again, isn't she half the reason he ended up on common ground with the boy?
"You should go for it" Nate whispers and Evelyn looks back up, confusion painting her features.
"What do you mean?" she asks and Nate sighs, eyes searching her hazel ones, trying to convey how much he loved her into a single look. It would be wrong to tell her now when she had already fallen for another guy.
"Go for him Evelyn. I know you, we all do, and it's a great thing you finally found someone you connect with. He understands you and for some unknown reason you understand him. You deserve to be happy and he makes you happy. In fact he's good at the one thing I've been trying to do my whole life" Nate says and Evelyn is shocked by the words coming out of his mouth, head shaking as she tries to comprehend the words he's saying to her.
"What’s that?" she asks, trying to wrap her mind around the fact he had read her so clearly. Noticed her feelings and fears without her even coming to terms with them yet.
"Take care of you" he says and Evelyn's heart cracks just slightly. Seeing the sadness in one of her oldest friends eyes. A friend she had been close with but never let inside. In fact until Charlie she had never quite met anyone who could calm her down with a single look. Even Violet had spent years trying. It was as if her and Charlie had been cut from the same cloth and there was nothing she could do when it came to who understood her or not.
"I'm sorry Nate" she begins to mutter but he just offers a sad smile, taking a step back from her as he see's Charlie leave the now fixed balloon arch and head their way.
"Don't be, just be happy" he tells her earnestly, offering one last squeeze to her waist before letting her go literally and figurativey. He figures some part of him will always love her but at least this way she can be happy and he can learn how to be too.
Evelyn watches as Nate walks away, passing their other friends who dance together and towards a table to take a break from the night. Her mind is spiraling in a hundred different ways and she doesn't have time to process when out of nowhere Charlie's arms wrap around her waist and pulls her into his chest. His chin lands over her shoulder, hot breath fanning on her neck. She relishes in the feeling of his warm chest pressed against her back and for the first time she accepts that the somersaulting feeling in her stomach is completely normal. All because she finally liked someone in a way she imagined she never could with anyone.
"Crisis averted" he tells her and she just smiles, turning in his arms to face him, and fighting the happy tears that burn at the back of her eyes.
"Thank you" she tells him for so much more than just the balloon arch but Charlie doesn’t catch on because when the next upbeat song starts he's locked his arms around her waist and lifted her from her feet. She laughs loudly as he swings her around the dance floor, her own friends laughing before he sets her back to the ground.
"Nice moves Charles" Violet calls out, hands interlocked with Marty's, and Charlie flashes her a cocky grin.
"What, Marty doesn’t have these smooth moves?" he teases right back and Marty scoffs even though there is amusement in his eyes.
"Oh she knows all my moves" he defends, not realizing how the sentence sounds and the group laughs loudly. Marty's ears burn red as he registers what he's just said but joins in on the laughter anyway.
"It was the best first, school dance. Thank you" Charlie ducks down in a whisper and Evelyn smiles, arms coiling arund his neck and pulling him closer. She knew there was more lying underneath Charlie Dalton's surface but for the first time she knew she had all the time in the world to figure it out. For now she'd get to know him at the speed he was comfortable with and pray that maybe when she did learn it all, she got to keep him.
"Anytime Char"
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Taglist: @eden-punk @linmichea1 @pursuedbyamemoryy @mynameisjxlia
Comment if you want to be added to the tag list :))
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noveldivergence · 3 months
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What's the point of making a cult leader to a dark eldritch god if you don't make him a fuckable older man-whore with a tragic backstory masked by the dumest fucking sense of humor you've ever seen in your life?
The only reason Alek hasn't tried to distract Bellamy from his various war crimes via seduction is because Alek's younger sister got there first and he owes her for all those times he accidentally fucked her crushes in university. Admittedly, Bell is straight, but the thought of that being what stopped Alek, genuinely never crosses Alek's mind.
Is he the antagonist? Sorta? He doesn't want to actually like hurt or undermine Bellamy. Thinks his gradual descent into madness is kinda funny though.
He also has a staggering collection of World's Okayest Dad mugs, which I find way more compelling about him honestly.
Photo reference used was Alexander Skarsgard.
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dylan-rodrigues · 7 months
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Twinkling Watermelon, ep. 7
oh cool, time for another tragic backstory. Also damn they just straight up confirmed our theories so casually lol
We love our intergenerational trauma. So basically Sekyoung treated her daughter exactly how her mom treated her… but perhaps worse, because her daughter was contemplating suicide?? Jfc
Good Lord. So don't tell me she's tryna set up her mom with Yichan? Eungyeol straight up not gonna get born if she gets her way…
They really went with the "scary black men try to molest innocent girl in an alley” trope huh? Yikes.
I love how in a snark to snark battle with the master of Viva La Vida, Sekyoung's daughter always wins... Eungyeol crying and throwing up rn, he could never
Honestly, I would feel more bad for Sekyoung’s daughter if I didn’t find her so insufferable and selfish on some level. But yeah, I do feel for her, Sekyoung is toxic beyond words. regardless, mental health issues is not an excuse to play with other people’s feelings or, um, wipe Eungyeol out of existence.
Oooh, she's gonna assume Eungyeol is her mom's first love now?? meanwhile, this poor boy in question is just in the hospital, just wanting to be with his mom and dad ��😭
Ugh so now Chung-ah is gonna go full tsundere now. Ofc she just ran out of the hospital…
Oh wait, nvm, they’re friends now 🥺. God, Yichan and Chung-ah are so cute. It’s so wholesome how he makes her… happy? At peace? Plus, she’s such a love-struck dork gosh
CALL ME BY MY NAME 🎶🎶🎶🎶
she really set up a board with photos and shit like she's a detective in a crime drama like
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Damn did Sekyoung's daughter straight up fall for Eungyeol… Bro got immaculate rizz frfr. But in all seriousness, she likes him now? I hope they develop this further, it feels so half baked rn
Eun-gyeol will never beat the gay allegations. tbh, we need to get his and Yichan’s actors in a BL. They got so much chemistry.Yichan lost his hearing while looking for Sun-gyeol… i don’t even wanna see how his son is gonna feel about that… 😭😭😭
You know what, I'm back to enjoying this. Sekyoung’s daughter (I refuse to remember her name) kinda turned me off from this drama at first but we back, baby.
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rye-views · 4 months
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Mr. Sunshine. 미스터 션샤인. 8.3/10
I wouldn't recommend this drama to my friends. I wouldn't rewatch this drama.
Yoo Yeon Seok in this character is new to me. I don't dislike it. I understand him for some reason, and I think he's hot. God, Lee Byung Hun has been hot my whole life. Chun Shik kinda cute.
What baller mothers we got in this show. Get me a supporter like Ms. Haman. This dessert candy shop looks bomb diggity. Let me in. Same with all the dessert foods we are eating. They look so good. Kim Taeri is such a good actress. She's just leaking out emotion behind this facade of aristocracy. I like Kyle's role and friendship with Eugene. He's also such a homie. Ae Sin enjoying all the fun foods are so cute to me. I love the vulnerability and shock when Ae Sin was like haven't you confessed like 2-3 times now to Eugene. I enjoy Hotaru as a character. The first hug between Eugene and Ae Sin, I was all squeals. Eugene stopping Kim Yong Joo in his room was hot. Yooo, the Ae Sin and Hina sword gun fight was epic. The letter exchanges are cute. Seeing elderly Joseph was so nice, but seeing his death was so tragic. I like Hina and Ae Sin's relationship once they discover each other's identities. I do enjoy the threesome of the men. Buddha leading the American to God is such a nice thought. Ae Sin and Eugene's dates make me smile. I love Eugene's relationship with Domi. I'm really enjoying the representation of this specific time period. I respect Kuno Hida a lot. Respect to when grandpa bought land plots for his farmers. The strong bond between all the protags is so beautiful to me. The proposal and the photo taken in Japan is too cute to me. I love Dong Mae's right hand man, Yuzo. I love the pawn shop owners and Haman and Haengrang.
The how do Joseon women distinguish colors with black eyes killed me. I have never heard such a thought. I cannot with the fact of the Five Eulsa traitors. Like five people is all it took for all the destruction and chaos that comes after? The tossing of the newspapers is so chaotic to me.
Lmaoo at the little boy being like this man keeps talking to me. Wait LOLL the encounter was so cute when Lady Haman brought the stitched notebook of Ae Sin's and said Eugene Choi's name was written so often.
Wow that power at Ae Sin telling Dong Mae that she knows she could kill him and he wouldn't be able to. Wow, someone pay me in gold bars. Wow, I want a love where I'm like, now that I love him, I can't ever go back. The accent for the Takashi character is crazy because the actor is Korean but is tryna sound like he isn't and it's great. People who are down to bite off their tongues are so wild to me. My gasp at Eugene being sentenced to jail with a dishonorable discharge. The Glory Hotel explosion was crazy.
The unfair deaths and destruction that happen after grandpa's death makes my blood boil, my eye twitch, and my body shudder. This show was like one villain isn't enough, let's add another.
Lee Yanghwa finally crying, I teared. I just started tearing so much after Japan took over. Okay, no tears, I straight up cried at Yanghwa's death. I cried at Haengrang and Haman's last moments. I'm sobbing by the time the town bands together to protect Ae Sin. I cried when Domi came back grown up.
Memorable Quotes: "그만하는건 언제든 할수있으니 오늘은 하지 맙시다. 오늘은 걷던쪽으로 한걸음더."
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robotstrategy · 5 months
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Recalled • Part 1 • 5 - Sam
Previous • Series Masterlist • Part 1 Masterlist • Next
Sam Zeus Ward, “The little version of that concept car made for babies” as Nero calls him. Sam loves his Rewind family, which for him really just consists of Nero as a big sister and Cam as a sort of mentor type.
But there’s one thing that makes him different from all his unit of ten, or even the state home in total. The gaping hole inside of him cannot be quenched. All the others fill that hole so easily, whether it’s Nero becoming a Military Beouf, Tonya wanting to become a teacher, or Ian being a great hockey player. 
Sam can’t fill that void, it keeps longing for more, always trying to grasp something new. 
“Is what we have not good enough for him? Honestly, he seems like a complete glutton to me. I don't know what Cam sees in him.” He had heard one of the Rewinds whisper when he and Nero were passing by.
“What I’m hearing is that he’s not interested in this stupid institution with this stupid boring plain stuff and I’m not interested in it either.” Nero had snapped back. Sam always thought back to what she had said, it seemed funny to him because Nero had become the most basic thing a ward kid could do, a Military Boeuf.
Sam spotted a lady out of the corner of his eye. He had seen her before, she always came along with Cam whenever he visited. Sam always left her alone, but he couldn’t not address her anymore, curiosity and the gaping hole inside of him couldn’t escape her anymore. 
“What are you doing?” Sam asks the woman, She turns around to reveal that she’s holding a camera.
“I am taking photos of all of you, I must show that you are triumphant and tragic. You must be seen as human, but humanity must know what a mistake it was to create you.” She tells him.
Sam now stares her straight in the eyes. “I think it’s great that you want to make us seem like humans, but why are we a mistake to you?”
“Your mere existence along with your brothers and sisters means that we have failed as a society and that all those parents have failed to let their children back into their lives.” She says.
Sam furrowed his eyebrows. “You know that some of their bodies were too far gone to even be built all back together, some of them were wards of the state, and some of them were unwanted.” He says, defending him and the Rewinds.
She gives him a look before saying “We aren’t going to get along are we?”
“I guess we won’t,” he says before turning away from her. He looks over to the other Rewinds avoiding meeting the woman's gaze again. 
One of the Rewinds joyfully runs up to the Woman, hopping around her trying to be within the view of the camera lens. 
“Record us, Una! Record us! We wanna show you something we did!” The girl exclaimed.
Una grimaced at her before pushing her away. “These photos are special, I cannot take videos of your stupid little things.”
After seeing the disappointed look on the girl’s face Sam is enraged and huffs his way over to Una. “Show me how to use one of those things.” He yells at her. 
“What?” Una says, spinning around to face him. 
“Show me how to use one of those things, I want to take videos of their stupid little things!” He yelled again.
“So, what is this?” Nero questions, putting her eyeball up to the barrel of the camera. 
“It’s a camera, I wanted to take videos of our friends since Una doesn't want to do that.” He tells her. 
“Oh cool! You know, you could do as the kids say, God, I sound old, vlog about your life and the other kids in the ward.” Nero suggests.
Sam runs up to Nero to give her a big hug “Thanks Nero that’s a great idea! I would probably have to get someone to edit them though, I don’t think they come out fresh off the tapes with all those horrendous sound effects.” He exclaims.
Nero lets out a good chuckle, “No problem, bud, no problem.”
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jasper-the-menace · 7 months
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10 books you've read reacently?
Ask Me My Top 10/Top 5 Anything
All summaries copied from Amazon.
1: Codex Black book 1: A Fire Among Clouds | Camilo Moncada Lozano
Donají is a fearless Zapotec girl who, even though she’s only fifteen, is heralded as a hero by her village. In Codex Black, Donají sets out on an adventure--accompanied by the god that lives inside of her poncho--to find her missing father. Along the way, she meets a 17-year-old winged Mexica warrior named Itzcacalotl, and over time their temporary partnership blooms into an incredible friendship.
The search brings the young pair closer to danger and deeper into mystery than either could have predicted. What exactly was Donají’s father involved with? And how did a simple search for a missing relative lead Donají and Itzcacalotl into a fight with a terrifying bat monster to defend an entire village?!
2: Red, White & Royal Blue | Casey McQuiston
When his mother became President, Alex Claremont-Diaz was promptly cast as the American equivalent of a young royal. Handsome, charismatic, genius―his image is pure millennial-marketing gold for the White House. There's only one problem: Alex has a beef with the actual prince, Henry, across the pond. And when the tabloids get hold of a photo involving an Alex-Henry altercation, U.S./British relations take a turn for the worse.
Heads of family, state, and other handlers devise a plan for damage control: staging a truce between the two rivals. What at first begins as a fake, Instragramable friendship grows deeper, and more dangerous, than either Alex or Henry could have imagined. Soon Alex finds himself hurtling into a secret romance with a surprisingly unstuffy Henry that could derail the campaign and upend two nations.
3: Shark Heart: A Love Story | Emily Habeck
For Lewis and Wren, their first year of marriage is also their last. A few weeks after their wedding, Lewis receives a rare diagnosis. He will retain most of his consciousness, memories, and intellect, but his physical body will gradually turn into a great white shark. As Lewis develops the features and impulses of one of the most predatory creatures in the ocean, his complicated artist’s heart struggles to make peace with his unfulfilled dreams.
At first, Wren internally resists her husband’s fate. Is there a way for them to be together after Lewis changes? Then, a glimpse of Lewis’s developing carnivorous nature activates long-repressed memories for Wren, whose story vacillates between her childhood living on a houseboat in Oklahoma, her time with a college ex-girlfriend, and her unusual friendship with a woman pregnant with twin birds. Woven throughout this bold novel is the story of Wren’s mother, Angela, who becomes pregnant with Wren at fifteen in an abusive relationship amidst her parents’ crumbling marriage. In the present, all of Wren’s grief eventually collides, and she is forced to make an impossible choice.
4: Straight | Chuck Tingle
When a strange tear in the cosmos appears within Earth’s annual path, the consequences are disastrous. For one night a year, the vast majority of humans now undergo a frightening mental change, transforming into hateful, rage-fueled zombies who will stop at nothing to satiate their desire for brutality.
While not much is understood about this horrific mass hysteria, the demographic it effects is very specific: cisgender straight people.
A few years after the first of these tragic events, four friends from across the queer spectrum look for safety in solitude, hunkering down in a remote desert cabin for what is now known as Saturation Day. With a vaccine available for straight people to curb their violent episodes, some predict the worst is over. Others aren’t so sure.
As night falls, it becomes clear that survival isn’t guaranteed this Saturation Day.
(Also read Camp Damascus by Chuck Tingle, preorder Bury Your Gays by Chuck Tingle, and also get into the erotic Tingleverse alongside the horror Tingleverse. That's a threat.)
5: Legends & Lattes | Travis Baldree
After a lifetime of bounties and bloodshed, Viv is hanging up her sword for the last time.
The battle-weary orc aims to start fresh, opening the first ever coffee shop in the city of Thune. But old and new rivals stand in the way of success ― not to mention the fact that no one has the faintest idea what coffee actually is.
If Viv wants to put the blade behind her and make her plans a reality, she won't be able to go it alone.
But the true rewards of the uncharted path are the travelers you meet along the way. And whether drawn together by ancient magic, flaky pastry, or a freshly brewed cup, they may become partners, family, and something deeper than she ever could have dreamed.
6: The Locked Tomb series 1: Gideon the Ninth | Tamsyn Muir
The Emperor needs necromancers.
The Ninth Necromancer needs a swordswoman.
Gideon has a sword, some dirty magazines, and no more time for undead nonsense.
Brought up by unfriendly, ossifying nuns, ancient retainers, and countless skeletons, Gideon is ready to abandon a life of servitude and an afterlife as a reanimated corpse. She packs up her sword, her shoes, and her dirty magazines, and prepares to launch her daring escape. But her childhood nemesis won’t set her free without a service.
Harrowhark Nonagesimus, Reverend Daughter of the Ninth House and bone witch extraordinaire, has been summoned into action. The Emperor has invited the heirs to each of his loyal Houses to a deadly trial of wits and skill. If Harrowhark succeeds she will be become an immortal, all-powerful servant of the Resurrection, but no necromancer can ascend without their cavalier. Without Gideon’s sword, Harrow will fail, and the Ninth House will die.
Of course, some things are better left dead.
7: The Complete Chi's Sweet Home part 1 | Konami Kanata
Chi is a mischievous newborn kitten who, while on a leisurely stroll with her family, finds herself lost. Separated from the warmth and protection of her mother, feels distraught. Overcome with loneliness she breaks into tears in a large urban park meadow, when she is suddenly rescued by a young boy named Yohei and his mother. The kitty is then quickly and quietly whisked away into the warm and inviting Yamada family apartment...where pets are strictly not permitted.
8: Lady Tan's Circle of Women | Lisa See
According to Confucius, “an educated woman is a worthless woman,” but Tan Yunxian—born into an elite family, yet haunted by death, separations, and loneliness—is being raised by her grandparents to be of use. Her grandmother is one of only a handful of female doctors in China, and she teaches Yunxian the pillars of Chinese medicine, the Four Examinations—looking, listening, touching, and asking—something a man can never do with a female patient.
From a young age, Yunxian learns about women’s illnesses, many of which relate to childbearing, alongside a young midwife-in-training, Meiling. The two girls find fast friendship and a mutual purpose—despite the prohibition that a doctor should never touch blood while a midwife comes in frequent contact with it—and they vow to be forever friends, sharing in each other’s joys and struggles. No mud, no lotus, they tell themselves: from adversity beauty can bloom.
But when Yunxian is sent into an arranged marriage, her mother-in-law forbids her from seeing Meiling and from helping the women and girls in the household. Yunxian is to act like a proper wife—embroider bound-foot slippers, pluck instruments, recite poetry, give birth to sons, and stay forever within the walls of the family compound, the Garden of Fragrant Delights.
How might a woman like Yunxian break free of these traditions, go on to treat women and girls from every level of society, and lead a life of such importance that many of her remedies are still used five centuries later? How might the power of friendship support or complicate these efforts? Lady Tan’s Circle of Women is a captivating story of women helping other women. It is also a triumphant reimagining of the life of a woman who was remarkable in the Ming dynasty and would be considered remarkable today.
9: The Sun and the Star: A Nico di Angelo Adventure | Rick Riordan and Mark Oshiro (who is CARRYING the book may I say)
As the son of Hades, Nico di Angelo has been through so much, from the premature deaths of his mother and sister, to being outed against his will, to losing his friend Jason during the trials of Apollo. But there is a ray of sunshine in his life—literally: his boyfriend, Will Solace, the son of Apollo. Together the two demigods can overcome any obstacle or foe. At least, that's been the case so far...
Now Nico is being plagued by a voice calling out to him from Tartarus, the lowest part of the Underworld. He thinks he knows who it is: a reformed Titan named Bob whom Percy and Annabeth had to leave behind when they escaped Hades's realm. Nico's dreams and Rachel Dare's latest prophecy leave little doubt in Nico's mind that Bob is in some kind of trouble. Nico has to go on this quest, whether Mr. D and Chiron like it or not. And of course Will insists on coming with. But can a being made of light survive in the darkest part of the world? and what does the prophecy mean that Nico will have to "leave something of equal value behind?"
Nico will have to face demons both internal and external as his relationship with Will is tested to the core in this standalone adventure featuring two of the most popular characters in the Percy Jackson saga.
10: Twenty Thousand Leagues Under the Sea | Jules Verne (David Coward: editor and owner of the funniest name ever)
In this thrilling adventure tale by the father of science fiction, three men embark on an epic journey under the sea with the mysterious Captain Nemo aboard his submarine, the Nautilus. Over the course of their fantastical voyage, they encounter the lost city of Atlantis, the South Pole, and the corals of the Red Sea. Along the way, they must battle countless adversaries both human and monstrous. This triumphant work of the imagination shows the limitless possibilities of science and the dark depths of the human mind.
For more than seventy years, Penguin has been the leading publisher of classic literature in the English-speaking world. With more than 1,700 titles, Penguin Classics represents a global bookshelf of the best works throughout history and across genres and disciplines. Readers trust the series to provide authoritative texts enhanced by introductions and notes by distinguished scholars and contemporary authors, as well as up-to-date translations by award-winning translators.
I've just been really enjoying reading again as of late.
~Jasper
PS: Most of these come down to the moral of the story being community building. I think I may be yearning for community.
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thatpunkmaximoff · 9 months
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Story: 4 out of 5 Smut: 4 out of 5
Who told me to read this book? Lol. I thought I was just in for an ex con railing a widow. I was not expecting a paranormal romance. There was so much heartbreak, and when the ghost came to the realization that they were the ghost.. oh my god.
I… I don’t have much to say. It was a damn good book, but I just… I don’t know.
Enjoy my ramblings, but head's up.. they're super spoiler-y..
* Mysterious mail showing up..? No thanks.
* “I’ll wait forever if I have to.” — umm, wtf?! Who in prison is being creepy af?
* Why would you reply?! 😂
* Okay so her house is spooky af 👀
* “I can still taste your skin.” — who the fuck is this Dante guy?!
* Purple splotches encircling her neck? One looks like a thumb? Is she being haunted?!
* Why do I get a feeling Aiden isn’t.. Aiden?
* Oh damn. Aiden is bold lol. He wants to bone Kayla and flat out told her.
* The words coming out of Aiden’s mouth rn.. holy shit 😏
* So she runs to Aiden when she thinks someone broke into her house. She totally wants to bone.
* Goddamn. Aiden can fuck 👀
* Now there’s a creepy man down by the tree watching Kayla? I thought I was in for straight up smut.. not some thriller/horror shenanigans.
* So the house is haunted. Cool. 👀
* She wasn’t smiling in her wedding photo to Michael and it appears as if her arm was bruised in the pic? Was Michael abusive and the wreck she mentioned earlier (the reasoning the gave for the bruises on her neck before) do something to her memory?
* GHOSTS?! Wtf is going on 😂
* Aiden and Kayla are some kinky fuckers 😏
* “If you decide this isn’t what you want, promise me you’ll end it before I fall in love with you.” // “I promise.” // “Good. But so you know, you don’t have much time.” — Jesus.. this man..
* is Aiden Dante?! I’m so fucking confused lmao. These ghosts are throwing me off.
* Oh damn. Aiden told her to get clarity and until she found it, he was gonna give her space 😬
* Well that tarot was ominous as fuck. Wtf happened in her past?! What is she blocking out?
* So little ghost boy sees Kayla and freaks? I’m gonna fucking riot if it turns out Kayla is dead and just doesn’t know it. Like her housekeeper said, some ghosts are confused. Especially if they died a tragic death. Like her husband. But what if it wasn’t her husband who died or was the only one who died..? 🥺
* SO DANTE’S THE GHOST?!
* I love Claire. Very chismosa lol
* Omg. This ghost wants revenge. What if it’s Aiden it wants revenge on? What is Dante is Aiden’s dad that he apparently killed?! Wtf is going on?!?!?!
* What… her detective friend is dead? Does that mean he’s the ghost..?
* No… no, no, no. Kayla’s not the ghost. She can’t be. No.
* Holy. Shit. What the fucking fuck.
* “Hey, bunny, did you miss me?” — 😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭
* Well at least they got to torture Michael in prison 🤷🏻‍♀️
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demonkeeperdark · 8 months
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This is going to be a loooonnnnnggggg story so I'm having to put it under a keep reading line lol
For those curious - this is a recent experience I had at a metallica weekend concert which waz the best weekend of my life
My dad had gotten me metallica tickets for my birthday in April for night one w/pantera and mammoth WVH because I had never thought I would ever see pantera in my life (Due to Dimebags tragic incident) and I had already seen 5FDP last year when Megadeth opened up for them. A few days ago before the concert I found out that we had accidentally gotten both day tickets. I was stoked because I had been thinking how cool it would be to see 5FDP again along with metallica twice in one weekend. We carefully planned out our weekend because I was not going to let my dad waste those tickets let alone we had 2 more- One for his girlfriend and originally one of his buddies who backed out. I pulled along my boyfriend since 1) hes never been to a concert and 2) metallica is also his favorite band so if he saw them as his first band I thought- well shit- if I was in his position I wouldve been fucking stoked (best part he said the weekend was his best weekend ever)
Friday morning we skipped school and work and shot immediately down to LA to avoid traffic (if you live in California or have at least driven through LA at least once you know what i mean) and had to find somewhere to stay the night and get ready for the first night.
We get to the stadium and find our seats and hear Mammoth WVH first and ive never heard any of their music and it was very good (highly recommend listening to them) and I was slowly getting more hyped. Pantera came up and- Phil Anselmo gets out there on stage in fucking board shorts and no damn shoes on his feet and hella made the entire stadium straight up go fucking crazy. So well fucking performed that night. We had about an hour wait before metallica and when they came up playing Creeping Death- like holy fuck??? Just straight up slapped in the face by this godly fucking music ive only heard in the car- on my headphones through either phone or cd player- through my record player- and now I get to hear it for real...right there...and oh my god, I felt like i was in a dream all day that day, and this wasnt even the best part of this weekend- and I felt so fucking amazed. The next 2 were Harvester Of Sorrow and Leper Messiah and it sounded so fucking good...2 very good songs I wasnt expecting them to play but holy shit- it was worth it. On came The Memory Remains- the entire stadium was singing- you could hear your own voice align with everyone elses... And then it was Lux Æterna- and then it was Too Far Gone?... It was great- it was amazing. Rob and Kirk had a little bit of a "doodle"... And they looked like they were having fucking fun. Next they played Fade To Black, and I started getting emotional...then they played Shadows Follow which is my favorite off the new album which brought my emotions back up- Just to get myself lost into listening to Orion...and Nothing Else Matters really kicked me in the feels...
Sad But True played and my bf got really hyped since it was one of his favorites off the black album, and once again i got hit in the feels with The Day That Never Comes....
And once again Hardwired brought my energy and emotions up and when Fuel hit my dad and I went full on screaming the song to each other and watching the pyro and flames go off.
Metallica all paused for a second and went...
"We have time for a couple more songs...how do you all feel about...SEEK?"
I didnt hear the first "seek", but fucking hell...my bf lit up like a light bulb...
And then fucking Master Of Puppets to finish off put that cherry on top.
And all i could think off was...
I get to see them.
Again.
In two
Fucking
Days.
NIGHT 2
Hyped as shit.
I get to see 5FDP Again.
I get to see fucking Metallica Again.
My phone dies...
So I think welp I'm fucked if I want to take photos and videos for myself but eh I get to enjoy it in person, I dont really need my phone and I cant complain about just seeing it and everyone else could record it and take photos so we could all look at it later together or something and have fun with it
It was hotter this night compared to the first, so before we ran to our seats we got drinks and I ended up cutting my hand open on a water bottle but I didn't let it bother me much
We went to our seats and started getting settled and this guy came up with what looks to be a VIP ticket slung around his neck and an envelope in his hand and goes
"Hey how are you guys tonight?"
My dad with his audacity goes
"Well my daughter got a cut on her hand from a water bottle a bit ago but this is her late birthday present and shes not letting that bring her down so I think were doing great!"
"Fucking sick!" This guy replies and says, "Hey you know what?" He puts his hand into the envelope...
4.
Fucking.
Snake Pit Wristbands.
He hands them to us along with guitar picks that my bf took so fucking many of and walks away saying
"You guys will be down there, have fun"
I start balling my eyes out.
I couldnt believe all of this was happening, we were trying to find our way down and I'm just crying while everyone was taking turns guiding me down and I stand there in this field and I look around really questioning if I'm asleep and I'm just tripping on drugs or if I'm literally in the middle of the snake pit and imagining how fucking cool James Hetfield is going to look standing there in front of me where I was standing against the wall.
I must've lost it for another 15 minutes before I came to my senses and actually started getting hyped for all this because everyone would be right there in front of me.
A few minutes later Ice Nine Kills performs and I also havent heard much of their music but they were badass, all dressed up and acting like they were killing people on stage and it looked so cool yet if you were where I was it also looked so fake at the same time but it was fucking great.
They ended and 5FDP was up next and the first time I saw them it was another situation where I was at the top of the stadium and i just saw them from a distance but now I could actually see them right in front of me.
And then they came up.
Holy shit.
I was so excited to see them again and right there that I couldn't stop jumping (literally) and I had more energy then everyone else in the pit for them to the point I had Ivan Moody, Zoltan Bathory, AND Chris Kael point at me at least once.
They started wrapping things up when Zoltan Came over, points at me, and throws a pick directly at me, and I had everyone around me trying to catch it before I did but I got it directly thrown at me and caught it and I got so happy I shook my bf, dad, and his girlfriend.
Next thing to you they played The Bleeding and Chris comes over and points at me while playing his bass guitar and we looked at each other and both lip sang to the song and I got more excited over that then getting the pick.
When they started leaving the stage he came back and gave me his sweatband that has his last name imprinted on it and I couldnt fucking take it.
It was so fucking cool and badass and I didnt stop wearing it till a couple hours ago when I could finally put it somewhere safe.
Everyone started crowding in for metallica and we all started getting crowded in, and once AC/DC's A Long Way To The Top started playing everyone got really excited and hyped and crowding in more.
Everyone also started looking at Jason Mamoa amd taking photos of him in the snake pit with us before metallica came out.
After Metallicas long cutscene/intro finished they came out and played Whiplash...
If I had just reached as far as I could I could've touched Hetfields foot thats how fucking close I was to him.
At that point I couldnt even explain song by song how amazing it was, I was just rocking out and I couldnt stop, it was so fucking cool and amazing and I couldnt stop jumping again and throwing up the devil horns it was great.
End of the show they were doing theyre out to and throwing everything out and my bf got one of their picks and I started having that verge of tears again because I still couldnt believe what I just witnessed.
Not only did I get rare collectables from 5FDP, but Metallicas crew gave us pit tickets to make everything possible and that proves how fucking amazing they are.
Best weekend of my life, I couldnt be anymore grateful.
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lesbiten · 2 years
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Hate to hop into your asks and drop this on you but god I am inspired by your walls of text tonight. I agree wholeheartedly with everything you said. The way that people dumb Fiddleford in particular down to just some hillbilly that dated Ford in a traditional romantic relationship is honestly wrong in so many ways. I won’t get into all of them for the sake of time and you reading this, which if you do, thank you so much. Something a lot of people fail to realize is that especially with the kind of abuse Ford received growing up (from Filbrick primarily but also the other children of Glass Shard Beach), there is no chance he would ever unpromptedly confess to Fiddleford and be like “yeah let’s get in a relationship”. Fiddleford as well is also so complex in this topic. He is clearly interested in women as he does dearly love Emma (keeping a photo of her on his desk, talking about her to Ford, being shown to miss her a lot), but when it comes down to it, he was queercoded. Which yeah sure great but that is not his only character trait! He’s incredibly written as a man in that day and age where mental health was very much taboo and he was doing the only thing he could think of to cope, which does actually link back to his childhood and how he was raised Christian but that’s a different conversation, he knew no other way than out of sight out of mind taken to the extremes which is so tragic in itself. He didn’t feel like he could really confide in anyone his fears, including his wife and best friend. I think the saddest part of him, though, really comes down to the memory gun and how he was so smart, he probably knew it would cause brain damage. Yet he still decided he would rather permanently damage his mind than deal with the trauma he’d received. Anyways there’s my wall of text sorry again. Have a good night o/
WOO MORE WALLS OF TEXT. THANK YOU ANON I LOVE IT
okay okay but i really think people forget a multitude of things when talking about the nature of their relationship and its
-its the 1980s in research era. In The United States.
-fiddleford is not only noted to be christian but like. Very christian. like ford puts a big emphasis on it. and obviously being christian doesnt stop him from being queer but once again he grew up during a time when those two things Especially did not mesh together
-filbrick absolutely was the kind of dad to. React Negatively if either ford or stan ever strayed from traditional masculinity. having a parent like that seriously impacts your ability to analyze your own sexuality
but anyways thats not me saying anything against people who don't really care about all that but i find that considering the complexities of the time they lived in as well as their own personal experiences makes their relationship a Lot more interesting than just. teehee they were in love. they r so much more Okay theres so much more to look at and talk about than just them having a regular normal relationship
Anyways . moving along
fiddleford is such an insanely interesting character outside of him being shipped with ford which is something i definitely think people forget. you are very right that him inventing the memory gun and ruining his life with it is a really good (if extreme) representation of how having poor mental health back then was very very frowned upon. to the point where he'd rather do all the things he did than simply confide in the two people closest to him about his struggles.
& yes yes he is Very sad to think about because ur not wrong that he was smart enough to know what the gun would do to him. even if after a few uses it slipped away from him. when he shows it to ford and ford tells him to destroy it, fiddleford straight up acknowledges he could (and doesnt want to) forget his wife and son, before proceeding to erase fords memory and keep the gun. he knows the risks. he would rather lose his life than deal with his trauma and axiety in a healthy way. and isnt that so great and awesome i feel great about it!!!!!! <- dead
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porcelain-yume · 2 years
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OUTLAW - THE MADNA (English Lyrics Translation 英訳)
Lyrics: Ryota; Music: THE MADNA
Stir things up
Praise to the bug
The RAT bites
Sid Vicious’ spirit
 
Smash the bat
With no promises
Floor raid attack
Victory’s command
 
So I swear things will never change
There will always be things I wanna say
Words burning deep inside my heart
So I’ll always keep dreaming
Piecing together these infinite dreams
In the starry skies above
A prayer for you
 
There’s nothing here at all 
Oh what colors will unfold?
Ain’t no sign of God
With your fists clenched tightly closed
Day in and day out 
Hold up your middle finger
Stick it straight to this world
Ready?
BAD trip show
Heart stop shock
Brain bite short.
 
Horns blasting
Commotion and chaos
Assemble at Babylon
As a matter of course 
Shoot red rays
Straight from your eyes
Strike the pinpoint
Prove you’re alive
 
So I swear things will never change
There will always be things I wanna say
Words burning deep inside my heart
So I’ll always keep dreaming
Piecing together these infinite dreams
In the starry skies above
A prayer for you
 
There’s nothing here at all 
Oh what colors will unfold?
Ain’t no sign of God
With your fists clenched tightly closed
Day in and day out 
Even in this world alone
Don’t you think you could have some fun? 
Lady
Notes:
Ryota said in an interview that he had a lot of fun writing these lyrics and there isn’t really any deep underlying message hidden within them. He wrote them as if he was telling a story or drawing a picture. This is pretty evident as there is a lot of commotion and strong, loud imagery going on in the lyrics which certainly brought along a few challenges when translating the song. I can only do my best to help you visualize the scene that he is setting. It’s up to you to use your imagination and bring the story to life.
バグ (bug): Maybe like a bug in the system?
Sid Vicious: “Sid Vicious was the bassist of punk band the Sex Pistols from 1977-1978. When his girlfriend Nancy Spungen was murdered in October 1978, he was charged with the crime. He died of a heroin overdose before the case could come to trial.” Ryota idolizes the punk scene, especially the fleeting and tragic romance of Sid and Nancy, so you’re likely to find multiple references scattered throughout his lyrics and MC. The MADNA Monthly Show also takes place in a live house sharing the same name as the famous Chelsea Hotel in New York where Nancy was found murdered.
カチ込む: It means カチコミ 殴り込み
Generally a term used with Yakuza, gangsters and delinquents. You’ll also see it appear a lot in manga or anime with that theme. It’s used for a group of multiple people striking and attacking another group (hostile). Usually comes with intense emotions of anger, dissatisfaction, resentment and demand. Other related terms: to smash, beat up, crush, punch up, “kill them” etc.
ツギハいた/ツギはぐ: It’s like patchwork or piecing. I wanted to capture the imagery of him taking all of his dreams and piecing them together like patchwork. 🧵🪡
The phrase “pieces of dream” was coined in English by his previous band, so I wanted to incorporate that too.
バビロン (Babylon): Babylon was the capital city of the ancient Babylonian Empire. Derived from the Akkadian word babilu meaning “Gate of God” or “Gate of the Gods”. It was the most glorious city of the ancient world with giant walls encircling the city. It gradually grew in size and grandeur, a heavily-populated city full of magnificent structures, palaces, gardens and temples. However as Babylon grew in power, so did the number of attacks against the city and the city underwent periods of long battle where Babylon would constantly rise and fall. Eventually the city began its descent into deterioration and decline and was completely destroyed. The city once known as 'the glory of kingdoms' became a place of utter desolation, forgotten among man.
The band did a photoshoot for the cover of Cure Magazine (Vol.223, April 2022) using this song as a motif. In the artist photos, the members all wear black and white clothing, whilst surrounded by an array of bright, vivid colors. The short promotional video starts in black in white and then suddenly comes to life in color.
Watch here
This song is also often used to close their live show. There is so much fire and passion burning when they play this song. It really comes alive on the stage.
My interpretation: This song gives me hella Gerard Way comic book vibes. This gang of dark heroes (outlaws) assembling an army, stirring things up and going up against the world. Heading for “Babylon”, King Ryota with his Japanese katana in hand, laser beams shooting everywhere - causing chaos and utter mayhem. Ready to kick some ass in an endeavor to find some excitement - all in the hopes of adding a splash of color to this dull and mundane life. Not at the control of any God, nor with any grand plan or design in place. They’re setting out to build a kingdom of their own. The final question remaining - Are you ready to join them?
Japanese, Romaji & Spotify Track:
ワッと沸かせbugに御礼
RAT噛ますシド·ヴィシャスの亡霊
Watto wakase bug ni orei
RAT kamasu Sid Vicious no bourei
バット潰す契りは無い
カチ込むフロア勝利の号令
Batto tsubusu chigiri wa nai
Kachikomu furoa (floor) shouri no gourei
そう、いつだって変わらない
伝えたい言葉はいつもこの胸の中にあるんだ
そう、いつまでも見てる
ツギハいだ数々の夢 星空、君に祈りを
Sou, itsudatte kawaranai
Tsutaetai kotoba wa itsumo kono mune no naka ni arunda
Sou, itsumademo miteru
Tsugihaida kazukazu no yume hoshizora, kimi ni inori wo
何もねぇーよ 何色になる?
神もいねぇよ 握り締めた手を日々を
こんな世の中に立てた中指をReady?
Nani mo nee yo nani iro ni naru?
Kami mo inee yo nigirishimeta te wo hibi wo
Konna yo no naka ni tateta nakayubi wo Ready?
BAD trip show
Heart stop shock
脳噛んでショート。
BAD trip show
Heart stop shock
Nou kande short.
クラクション爆音で騒然
集合バビロンは当然
放て目から赤い光線
ピンスポ当てろ 我の証明
Kurakushon bakuon de souzen
Shuugou babiron (Babylon) wa touzen
Hanate me kara akai kousen
Pinsupo atero ware no shoumei
そう、いつだって変わらない
伝えたい言葉はいつもこの胸の中にあるんだ
そう、いつまでも見てる
ツギハいだ数々の夢 星空、君に祈りを
Sou, itsudatte kawaranai
Tsutaetai kotoba wa itsumo kono mune no naka ni arunda
Sou, itsumademo miteru
Tsugihaida kazukazu no yume hoshizora, kimi ni inori wo
何もねぇーよ 何色になる?
神もいねぇよ 握り締めた手を日々を
こんな世の中でも楽しめそうだろ? Lady
Nani mo nee yo nani iro ni naru?
Kami mo inee yo nigirishimeta te wo hibi wo
Konna yo no naka demo tanoshimesou daro? Lady
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emmie-sue-who · 2 years
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You Must Be Fun at Parties
TW: death, natural disaster
In my dream, a building collapses. A tall one. 14, 15 stories. The skeletal remains give you some idea of what the building used to be if you can imagine it used to be anything. There are appendages sticking out of the rubble. Blood everywhere, soaking pages of scribbled-on forms, legal pads with notes that no longer need to be remembered. That crayon portrait of a family holding hands under the sun used to be pinned to a cubicle wall next to a wedding photo. It is all debris now.
There should be people screaming, I think. I could swear I see a finger twitching somewhere. But it’s only silent.
A woman, midforties, wearing a navy blazer over a pale pink dress, begins climbing the over the destruction in her kitten heels. She sets a microphone down on a fairly level spot so she can use both hands to pull herself up, then picks up the microphone again, stands, dusts herself off, and turns to smile at a camera.
Can they show this on the news, I’m wondering. There’s got to be some rule about that. It’s too fresh a gravesite.
I was wrong before, about it being silent. There are wheezing, rattling breaths coming from the far right corner where a passing dog got partially buried under the brick. It grows so loud I can barely hear the reporter speaking over it, something about casualties, something about a lawsuit, something about tragedy.
When the camera stops rolling, she starts to clamber back down and suddenly pauses midway. The heel of her shoe has punctured the eye of a corpse and she slips her foot out, hovers with one leg tucked up flamingo-style over the dead body. Dream-me knows somehow that she is wondering whether she should pull the shoe out of the eye and put it back on. What would be least disrespectful in this scenario? She settles for leaving the shoe behind and it hangs there from the socket.
I tell myself she will cry when she gets home. This is the only way I know to make sense of it. That she only put on a good face for her job, a job of the worst sort, but she will remember this and sob for hours.
But I am not here to observe this woman. I am here, I know, to find somebody.
I wake up mid-search, my hands dusty and blistered and coated red from heaving around jagged pieces of office building—my blood or someone else’s? But when I look down my hands are clean. There is light pouring in from the window of the room in a house I no longer live in. A house I came to in hopes that it would help not to be alone. Someone ought to have woken me up, I think. They shouldn’t have let me see all that. 
But they don’t know, and how could they? I’ve never witnessed something so tragic in real life, never been given a reason to think of such things except in passing mentions.
Still, my mom notices. She tells me I look tired, tells me I look worse every time she sees me. Maybe letting me sleep late was all she could think to do, but sleep like this makes me nervous to close my eyes.
Dad says I have anxiety because I watch too many violent TV shows. At least that’s what he’s saying now. Last week it was because I was in spiritual poverty and the week before that because my generation is too soft. This week, though, he’s convinced my mind has been infected by televised rot. I know none of that is real, I point out to him. Still, you put garbage in, you get garbage out, he says before flicking on the evening news.
God, the world is burning, isn’t it?
I hear about things, everyone does, but it’s been so long since I really took a look. I guess I decided somewhere along the way ignorance was as close as I would get to bliss. That probably makes me terrible. Who buries their head in the sand when everyone around them is suffering? Am I the kind of person that will step over bodies, dig my shoe into someone’s eye, and go home with a straight face? I am doing what I need to do to survive, I think. That is not a good enough excuse, I also think. It does not stop me from leaving the room just ten minutes in to the report.
On Monday, a derecho passes through the Midwest, and, beyond confirming the safety of my family and my coworkers, I do not look into it. The next morning, my boss tells me that she knows someone who knows someone who was asleep when her window smashed in. She was cut by the shards of glass and bled out. When I get to my desk, I barely hear the office chatter, but I know they’re all talking about the storm, something about luck, something about a tree falling on a car, something about power lines down.
I close my eyes briefly and remember the way I was scrambling, searching through the wreckage in my dream. I feel the same desperate energy boiling up now, but I have nowhere to direct it. I drum my fingers on my desk, open my email, join in with the dozens of other clacking keyboards.
I know I will think about that woman—lying there, bleeding, the wind howling—all day, probably all week, if I do not distract myself. So I keep busy. I keep as busy as I can keep myself so my eyes are focused elsewhere.
Keeping busy, I think, is the best existence I can give myself.
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