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#still feel like i have to work on values and things like that
id-element0 · 2 days
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Adele's Ramsay Living for TS3
2 years ago, on a fateful evening, I decided to convert this set to TS3. Although this had already been converted, I had my reasons to do my own conversion. Long story short, there were things that I didn't like and things that I liked.
One thing that I liked in the previous conversion was the effort to make the table tops glass. So I experimented with the Basic Shower which is supposed to have frosted glass. I don't know why EA use horrible textures; when you replace the NormalMap with a proper frosted glass texture it looks amazing.
So, using this knowledge as a base, I worked on the frosted glass table tops and after countless failures, I finally managed to have the effect I wanted. The key is having the right values for UVSelector parameters in the shader.
I also changed the textures for the bottle; tried to recreate it as a multiplier. Then made another version. Bottles are semi-transparent glass and recolourable. Don't ask me how I made them - I don't remember. But I if have to guess, there is this tutorial that I know of. The first part is about recolourable glass.
I wasn't feeling Adele's art for the painting. So, I used the recolours made by @timeparadoxsims. The artist is @len-yan and the art is amazing. If any of them want me to remove the painting from my downloads, I will do so but cry inwardly. 😢
I know people hate reading and just want to download but THIS IS IMPORTANT: Several items share textures. So you need to have the 'masters' in your game for the 'slaves' to work. I will group them and explain further.
The Loveseat is the master for the following objects: Armchair, Sofa, End Table (Solid Top), Coffee Table (Solid Top).
Loveseat, Armchair, Sofa -> 4 Channels - 2 presets with second being Adele's black overlay & metal and wood parts still CAStable.
Loveseat Polycount -> HLOD: 1746 MLOD: 702
Armchair Polycount -> HLOD: 1578 MLOD: 726
Sofa Polycount -> HLOD: 1962 MLOD: 1096
End Table, Coffee Table -> 3 Channels - 1 Preset
End Table Polycount -> HLOD: 710 MLOD: 444
Coffee Table Polycount -> HLOD: 1322 MLOD: 720
The Cushions for Loveseat is the master for following objects: The Cushion for Armchair, The Cushions for Sofa.
All Cushions -> 1 channel, 3 different multipliers - 5 Presets with 2 of them being overlays. You don't need moveobjects on to place them on their appropriate seating. If you use alt to place the seating you need to use alt to place the cushions as well.
Loveseat & Sofa Cushions Polycount -> HLOD: 160 MLOD: 80
Armchair Cushions Polycount -> HLOD: 80 MLOD: 40
The Glass Top End Table is the master for The Glass Top Coffee Table.
Both tables have 1 Channel & 1 Preset. Polys are same as the solid tops.
Decorative Bottles
Both have 1 Channel & 1 Preset.
Polycount -> HLOD: 242 MLOD: 119
Decorative Vase
3 Channels - 2 Presets
Polycount -> HLOD: 446 MLOD: 344
Large Frame Painting
1 Channel - 18 Presets
Polycount -> HLOD: 82 MLOD: 64
I've also included the collection file which comes with its own icon for easy recognition. As always, I might have missed something; if you find anything weird don't hesitate to tell me so I can try and fix it. I hope you'll enjoy this beautiful set by talented Adele. Happy simming.
- Credits -
Adele for the meshes and textures.
@len-yan for the art.
@timeparadoxsims for the ts2 recolours
Google Fonts Montez, Kurale
Made with: SimPE, GIMP, s3oc, s3pe, Blender, Texture Tweaker 3, and TSRW
@pis3update @kpccfinds @xto3conversionsfinds
- DOWNLOAD -
:: MEDIAFIRE | SFS ::
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olderthannetfic · 2 days
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I run a side blog in my small fandom and I vet new followers just by clicking on their names and checking their bio/pinned/first couple posts so I can report bots and soft block antis.
The people who have the vague DNIs are, I swear to god, the dumbest shits alive.
You can contact them like, "You've followed this blog. It violates your own DNI criteria. Would you like me to block you?" And they will spend the next 5 messages acting like they've never encountered another human being before. They'll say things like "oh I didn't know," or "I'm not following you're (sic) blog," like you can't send them screenshots.
And look, you (general you) and I both know that these dumbshits want to front like they're holding fanfiction to good moral standards in front of their buddies — who will presumably shiv them if they step out of line — while still indulging in their filthy fantasies in private, sure.
But if you say, "Alright, I am taking your boundaries seriously and at face value. How shall we enforce them?" they will suddenly forget how tumblr works and start pissing themselves like if they only toddler hard enough you'll feel bad for them and they can avoid answering the question. It's... pretty pathetic.
--
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accio-victuuri · 1 day
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April CPNs round-up! ❤️💛💚
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• BJYX shows up in station sisters team building photos/videos. proving that the pairing is still very much relevant and loved 🫶🏼
• allegedly spending some time together 4/2 and 4/3 when yibo went to shanghai
• cql and xz gets mentioned in a livestream for WoF
• wyb with a beaded bracelet that seems to be a clue that he spent time with GG ; more on the initial thoughts about the bracelet and why give an obsidian one
•zsww fake rumor of their meet up
•their love for watching old cctv spring festival gala sketches
• 4/8, in the FPU douyin update, he continues on with the dog theme ☺️ he really is a puppy! gouzaizai!
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• not really a cpn/candy but their name side by side for the alleged registration list for Magnolia Award. i’m just so proud and as a cpf, it feels good seeing them succeed. 👏🏼👏🏼👏🏼
• 4/8 cpns : fan used for camping that xz uses, the number 38 and us clowning about concerts
• some are comparing this interaction between wyb and hjy in FPU bts with how he is with GG. saying when he is hurt, he goes all out and shows it to GG but with others he won’t say anything. i agree that this thing is true both for GG/WYB, meaning they only show “weakness” to each other 🥺🥺🥺
* throwback post : fake rumor story during cql shoot of someone that works closely with yibo
• this side by side photo, they look alike in this profile!
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• 4/16/24 zsww rumor
• the rumor that wyb visited LOZ shoot and my thoughts on it ; i know i cannot stop people from “enjoying” this material and what it potentially implies but i personally cannot condone the type of behavior that disrespects them. especially xz who has been v frustrated with the leaks happening in his project. and just to dispel the rumors, this is who people are saying is supposedly yibo ⬇️⬇️⬇️
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🤦‍♀️🤦‍♀️🤦‍♀️🤦‍♀️
no shade to this guy. he was just a victim of people’s overzealous tendencies. this is not the first time cpfs have done this, in OOL and OnO we’ve had questionable video evidences too which is most likely not who we think it is. please stop. it’s not just the leaks. we have to protect them. we know they visit each other, let’s just bridge the clues with what they give us. we cpn that they visit the ST or probably even follow certain cpf accounts, there is just no universe that they will see this kind of conversations related to leaked photos and videos and be happy about it.
• DESCENDANTS OF THE SUN AU 😭😭😭😭 idk man. military/police wyb and doctor xz pairing is really top notch!
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• 4/19 xiao zhan weibo post for the 6th solar term - Guyu ( Grain Rain ) and all the clowning: one / two
• 4/20 zsww rumor ; hinting at them working on a project where one will direct and the other will act
• WYB’s GQ hat could be a custom made one from Tod’s????
• A new explanation about the mystery driver and comparing it to the mask WYB uses
• There has been some conversation because of WYB’s bazaar shoot with his FPU co star/team and that it’s no longer just XZ that he has done that with. Well i have to say that no matter what people say, the bazaar one with XZ is different. just the production value and theme of it — was more romantic and WYB was totally expressive. plus don’t forget that the shoot for that was where xz called him Venus. it will always be special, cause it’s just the 2 of them. there is no use comparing, i bet you, xz will have a joint cover or spread for LOCH with the female lead. it is part of marketing.
• yibo and his rainbow necklace 🌈
• I will add this here cause i don’t think it needs a separate post with how galaxy brain it is. it’s about certain photos uploaded by YBO being 2.3 MB in size. 23 love zhan. whether this is intentional or something special. who knows. it just came up again this month because the bear photo is with the same file size. 🤷🏻‍♀️
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other instances are outlined by this account on weibo :
February 3, 2:30 pm (Picture 1) // May 11 (Picture 3) // June 1st, Children’s Day, “Children are in love” (Picture 5) // August 5th, birthday composition (Picture 7)// November 22 (Picture 9)
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• 4/29 zsww fake rumor
• GUCCI wall 2.0 is close to Lacoste big screen ad! oh the possibilities!
• 4/29 candies to enjoy ( includes: their promos not overlapping, jiayou parallel, double standards and the bead bracelet discussion again )
See you all next month! ✌🏼💛
<<< previous month
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I have been seeing a bunch of buzz recently online about a possible "decline in value" of the ivy league+ degree - Nate Silver didn't start it but he certainly accelerated it. And while there is nothing robust you do see things like surveys of hiring manager opinions out there to suggest its possible, its not a crazy idea even if its far from proven. So assuming its real, why would it be happening?
1: This discourse is obviously happening because of the recent protests at top US schools - essentially its the idea that elite students are hyperpolitical, coddled, and out of touch with reality. This causal path should be very, very silly. The vast, vast majority of students at Columbia are not protesting. They don't really care about this topic! Sure, if asked, they agree Israel Bad Right Now, but otherwise they are busy with finals and job apps. This is of course equally true at most other schools, its just not a mass movement in that way (protesting to be clear rarely is). This is a specific instance of the general trap of selection bias - the visible students aren't the median ones.
Stacked on top of that is the second level of selection bias - the median protestor is not a business major or engineer! They are exactly the kind of students for whom being a politically engaged activist is *good* for their career, not bad, or at least neutral. Schools produce a large diversity of career outcomes, and those students self-select on how they spend their time, there is no "median" student to observe really.
And ofc all of this has to rest on the foundational reality that people are products of their context - jobless 20 year old's surrounded by young peers protest a bunch, that is what that context produces. The large majority of them will become mortgage-paying white collar workers by the time they are 30, this identity will not stick with them. If they become political activists it will, sure! But if you are the hiring manager for Palantir this isn't going to be the trend for your hires. There are "politically liable" hires out there but you aren't going to predict them via the sorting algorithm of "was at Columbia in 2024", that is for sure.
Now, as much as this is a silly idea, humanity are zeitgeist creatures - I can't actually reject the idea that, despite it being silly, hiring managers might use this moment to feel like they are "over" the Ivy League and start dismantling the privileged place their applications currently get. Cultural tipping points are vibes-based, and amoung elites (unlike the masses, who don't care much) Israel/Palestine has an awful lot of tense vibes.
2: Still, I don't think this is explaining those survey results people are throwing around, and I don't think its explained (very much at least) by the general "woke uni" trends of the past half decade. It is instead downstream of wider trends.
There was a time where companies really did want "the smart guy". You could major in English at Harvard, write a good thesis on Yeats, and be off to the trading desk in Chambers St two weeks after graduation. Those days are over - for complex reasons we won't get into - and nowadays people expect their new hires to be as close to experts in the field as they can manage. Students have internships, consulting clubs, capstone projects with real clients, specialized sub majors, the works. These are all ways of saying "signaling quality" has gotten more legible and more specific over time. Why would I choose a Harvard English major over a University of Illinois finance major who did a research internship with our specific Chicago firm on midwest agricultural derivates markets? Students like that exist by the bucketful now, and the Ivys cannot monopolize them. Partially because they choose not to; Columbia could actually say fuck it and make its school 90% finance majors, but they don't want that, they specifically recruit intellectually diverse students. Which means State School finance types will fill the remaining slots slots.
The other reason they can't monopolize is much simpler - numbers. The US has way more "elite" jobs today than it did in the past. Programmers and their adjacencies are the biggest growth sector, but everything from doctors to analysts to lawyers is all up up up. And do you know what isn't up? Undergraduate enrollment at elite schools! Columbia's has grown by like 10% over the past 20 years; Harvard's is essentially unchanged. For, again, reasons, these schools have found the idea of doubling or tripling their undergraduate enrollment, despite ballooning applications, impossible. Which means of course Microsoft can't hire from Stanford alone. So they don't, and they have learned what other schools deliver talent, and no longer need Stanford alone. The decline of Ivy Power is in this sense mathematical - if a signal of quality refuses to grow to meet demand, of course other signals will emerge.
I therefore personally think, while minor, the Ivy+ schools are experiencing declining status, have been for a while, and will continue to do so (though there are offsetting trends not mentioned here btw). But its structural way more than cultural.
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vsaintsin · 2 days
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Writeblr Re-Intro
Yo! I'm V Saintsin. Or V or Vin or Saintsin or whatever you want to call me that sounds right on your tongue. I'm a self-proclaimed Social Media fumbler who got a late start to the party and has never quite figured it out. I hate how hipster and edgy it sounds to say "I'm bad at social media" but like I used to work with some people who actually managed the social media accounts for the business we worked for and there were rules and whatnot and damn, I think online media is just not my medium. That being said, here I am! Hah
I'm an author and general mess who's hoping to be the miracle man (somebody who makes a living writing silly little stories). I do use a pseudonym but please hear me out when I say I didn't realize how edgy it sounds, it just has some sentimental value to my personal life. I'm so sorry that I sound like I'm in my emo phase HAHA
About me -
He/Him Transguy from the American Midwest (arguably the south, depending on who you talk to, but the older people still say "Sodi-pop" and "ope").
I'm dysautonomic, bendy, permanently sleepy, and a survivor of Crappy Doctors Who Suck At Doctoring.
I like DnD, Pathfinder, Baldur's Gate 3, Cyberpunk, Dragon Age, and other things in that vein.
I do make art of my stories and characters (Tablet is currently not working so I'm in a dry spell).
My writing background is predominantly ancient, dusty RPs from as far back as the foopets days and fanfic writing on Quizilla - I am an old and wizened elder of the net.
My formal education was music performance and behavioral neuroscience, I don't really know how I got where I am.
This is not my first rodeo with tumblr but it is the first time I have anything to SAY instead of just lurking.
In the event of malfunction, you can put me outside for 5 minutes and I'll probably factory reset.
My existence as I know it hinges on a massive number of sticky notes plastered throughout my room.
What I'm lookin' for -
Idk, whatever? I'm down for most things. Did you write it? Cool, let me see. I'm not too bent on genre or anything, just fascinated by the art of storytelling.
A bit tentative with fanfiction but that's just because if it's not a fandom I'm familiar with I am rather clueless about what the hell is going on and if it's a fandom I am familiar with I HUNT DOWN THE DEEP LORE.
I like art a whole lot, including fanart. Also art advice, love seeing things from different perspectives and learning something new.
Mutuals, really, for any reason. Building better connections on here, getting to know people. I am hideously bad at this but I try.
What I write -
Science Fiction with heavy subjects that matter to me - trigger warnings on a story-by-story basis.
High Fantasy (eventually books I think?) characters and their backgrounds for DnD and Pathfinder - I have been tempted to share these to help people get ideas or just for free use?
Things that I delete because I have crippling imposter syndrome and publishing makes me nauseous (doin' it tho).
Stories that I hope will make people feel less alone or that people could relate to, stories that I wish I had when life was worse and I was reaching out for anything I could find to keep me afloat, stories that try to be critical of things that SUCK in a way that's any helpful.
Lots of curse words and cussing (that's just how people talk 'round here), dubious science, things that I hope might make you cry but in a good way though.
Character-Driven stories that revolve more around the development of the person and less around the plot itself if that makes sense.
I've put blurb things below for my primary project/series which features a grumpy, queer, 37-year old chain smoking Frenchman and his misadventures with life and love and unbridled rage. If any of that sounds cool stick around and hang out? (This part is a plug bc I did a thing and I'm proud of it) And if my books sounds interesting the first one is 99 cents on Kindle and you just need a phone and a free app to read it!
THE SECRET OF LIFE (Published) - Sci-Fi/Psychological Thriller, Bi M Lead, Lovers to Enemies, AI but the oldschool cool kind not the real world thing that's stealing our future
Carlisle-Trystan Antoinette is a mercenary on a hard road, navigating life and death itself in an infinite cycle started by powers above his understanding. He has one mission - warn The Dianican Space Station of the coming threat and put a stop to a war that would encapsulate the whole of the Sol System before it can ever begin. Unfortunately for Carlisle, reality is a tenuous thing, made up only by our understanding of it. At least, according to his Psychiatrist, who tells him that there is no war, that he was never a mercenary, and that what Carlisle is experiencing is a severe but manageable psychotic break. Stripped of his combat enhancements, his bio monitor, and everything he's every known, Carlisle has a decision to make. Does he give in to the thoughts and memories, so real that he can almost taste them, or does he live a life of comfort and ease, returning to a husband and daughter that he left behind?
TWs: Domestic and War Violence, suicide, rape, medical trauma, grief, drug use
THE SILENCE OF ANGELS (Due July '24, TSoL 2) - Betrayal and Rage, Learning how to love again slow-burn romantic subplot, Learning how to Dad, A general inability for any one thing to just go right
(Quick Rough Blurb that offers no spoilers for TSoL) Making connections isn't easy for somebody who's accustomed to burning bridges. Isolation has always been Carlisle's mantra for surviving his life. Playing a role comes second nature, pretending to be the man that everyone else wants to see in him. When an old friend is murdered Carlisle finds himself as the primary suspect with all evidence pointing to him so clearly that even he calls to question what he is capable of. Unwilling to believe that he could commit such a heinous crime, Carlisle sets off to find the truth of his friend's death - was Carlisle framed or does he truly have the capacity to bring such harm upon those he loves? Old and new bonds will be tested, faith broken, and the future of everyone called into question as lines are drawn and sides are picked.
TWs: Violence, mentions of SA, graphic character death, more grief, more death
I don't know what else to say... Later!
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Power ranking BG3 ladies based on how much I'd personally like to marry them
All main and supporting women: Shadowheart, Lae'zel, Karlach Minthara, Jaheira, Isobel, Aylin, Mizora, Orin
Plus my background babes: Florrick, Talli, Alfira, Lakrissa, Araj, Nocturne, Skoona, Adrielle, Z'rell, Roah, Nine-Fingers, and special guest star Philomeen
*Isobel and Aylin deserve to be regarded as individuals occasionally, so yes I'm wrecking that home (Alfira and Lakrissa too)
*essentially, top 10 is "women I would like to marry" and 11-21 and is "women I would not like to marry"
Quartermaster Talli. Granted she has an unfair advantage due to looking and vibing as a fusion of my IRL girlfriend and the butch lesbian who installed my new garage door 3 years ago whom I'm still mildly obsessed with. But anyway, we'd have a really great life together. We'd be able to communicate, we'd be compatible in the bedroom, we have similar values. Wife material, Grade A - the gold standard comparison for everyone else on the list.
Isobel. We'd have our tiffs (we can both be a little catty and sensitive), but overall we'd be a pretty stable match. We'd put in the work to make it last. I feel like being a cleric counts as a "job" so I appreciate that.
Nocturne. My #1 "I can fix her" pick because I think I actually can. I appreciate a hard worker, so Nocturne having distinguished herself in her uh workplace enough to become an officer is very respectable to me. We could go to therapy together. Not a perfect match, but I think we could make it work.
Lakrissa. Would be an easy second place if she didn't read so young. She's a little immature (a little over-dedicated, a little too self-sacrificing) and so she'd have to do some growing up, but I think we could make it work.
Florrick. Even though she's my #1 beloved and by FAR the sexiest person in the entire game and I would do anything to [redacted], we'd be like two brick walls getting married. We're too similar. But sheer affection and lust propel her to the top 5 anyway, even though we'd probably be married 10 sexless years before one of us finally snapped and filed for divorce.
Skoona. Assuming she drops the whole self-deprecating thing (can't stand that). She has a job, she's sensitive, she's romantic, she's humble, and she's hot. I don't think we'd knock each others' socks off, but we'd be a nice match.
Lae'zel. Extremely 22 years old and that's an issue for me. I'm also too sensitive to make it through her tough outer shell to get to the soft waifu meat inside. However, she does have amazing wife material to uncover, so I think if I could be her second wife, we'd be golden.
Adrielle. We'd have our problems as two neurotic faux-normies, but we're neurotic in different ways, so maybe we'd complete each other? She's very conscientious and thoughtful, though, which are the most important wife traits for me. With commitment and therapy, we'd make it work, but it wouldn't be the smoothest ride.
Jaheira. I don't really want to be a step parent to young kids, so that pulls her down the list a bit, but there's no way I couldn't have her in the top 10. We'd get along great; we have the same sense of humor; we're both not clingy. A good match, but not really the wife for me.
Minthara. I want her so bad but she'd eat me alive and not in the sexy way. I would let her walk all over me for 2-3 years though, assuming she didn't dump me first. Impossible to rank below the top 10, but objectively not the wife for me.
Shadowheart. Like Lae'zel, there's a lot to get through before you get to the wife material deep inside. I would also need to be her second wife. Also, I'm not doing that cottagecore shit and I cannot have that many animals in my house.
Araj. I know I called her bad in bed 2 different ways in two other posts but that's not a problem, she's so sexy and interesting to me that I know I would fall super hard for her. I too love science? We have something in common. I feel like she'd bring out a lot in me, not necessarily good things, but to be loved is to be changed? I would probably come to my senses before really risking it all though.
Alfira. I love her so much but I am no Lakrissa, I could not handle both supporting her while she pursues her artistic goals AND having to top every time. We'd be that miserable couple that lets it drag on forever because nothing is *wrong* even though nothing is *right* and wind up hating each other.
Nine-Fingers. She'd stress me out too much. Running the streets, making enemies... what if a shake-down goes wrong? Admittedly I'm tempted to live out my mafia wife fantasies with her, but realistically, I think I'd have too many nervous breakdowns to make it worth it.
Karlach. The divorce would be so epic that I almost wanted to rank her higher, but I just know deep down that we would trigger/frustrate the fuck out of each other and completely implode long before making it to the courthouse and/or altar.
Aylin. I routinely get over-stimulated by my cats brushing against my leg when I'm trying to multi-task working and listening to music, so there is no universe in which I could tolerate being married to Aylin. She's too exuberant and touchy. I would be scream-crying WHY ARE YOU YELLING AT ME every time she simply asked me how my day was in her usual volume. An absolute disaster, she'd smother me despite her best intentions.
Z'rell. She can have place #17 to match the 17 husbands which I would not be okay with. I'm not jealous, but I'm not THAT not jealous. She's also just really harsh and I'm a crier, so we probably would not be able to have a conversation, let alone a relationship.
Roah Moonglow. Like Nine-Fingers, but I feel like the Zhent is like, a second-rate criminal organization and so it'd be like being a second-rate mafia wife. All the stress, fewer fist-sized emerald necklaces.
Mizora. On top of everything else, she's also a corporate LAWYER... yuck
Philomeen. I would go on 1 date with Philomeen, let her start a blowup fight with me outside of [regional burrito chain], let her neg me into fucking anyway, go no contact, and let her booty call me 2 years later at 3AM like nothing happened, but I would not even slightly consider dating her, let alone marrying her.
Orin. Ignoring the whole serial killer thing that's neither here nor there, the problem is the combo of overbearing family (my #1 dealbreaker of all time) and lack of communication skills (my #2 dealbreaker of all time). Like I'd be constantly trying to get her to go no contact with Serevok and she'd never listen and she'd always be talking in fucking Dr Seuss riddles and disappearing and pissing me off.
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ktaerssoi · 14 hours
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just keep swimming
nika mühl x swimteam!reader
summary: being a swimmer for UConn isn't always easy.
notes: i did NOT mean to make this so angsty, i was literally thinking about something cute while i was writing so idk where this came form. please don't kill me! - kate
(1.7k)
it was hard being on the UConn swim team, not only were the practices grueling, but the meets took hours and hours. this wouldn't be a problem to most, because if you love your sport you would give up almost anything.
and you did love your sport, but you loved your girlfriend even more. which is what made swim meets so difficult. most of the time, it would be from eight a.m. to four p.m.. and it just so happened that nika's game schedule was also within those hours. meaning she usually had a game while you were at your meet, making it hard for you to attend her games.
not to mention she was missing your meets, which wouldn't bother you normally but when it's been happening all season long it sort of gets to you. what if she wasn't coming because she doesn't think it's important?
you knew she had time in the mornings, time that she usually worked out during, but why couldn't she make an exception to see you? you were stressed out, to say the least.
you finally reached your breaking point the night before one of your most important meets against Georgetown.
-
you and nika were curled up together in bed, watching a movie on your laptop. her hands were on your hips, and she slowly started to travel to your back, massaging different parts as you groaned lightly.
"tense for the meet tomorrow? you'll do great baby," she muttered into your ear as she stopped her movements, causing you to turn and face her, the lack of physical contact making you cold.
"you would know if you came to one," you didn't mean for it to come out so harshly, and you watched as her face quickly contorted to one of hurt. "oh im sorry, should i call off my game?" you knew you had hurt her feelings, but she didn't have to come back like that.
"nika you know that's not what i meant." you watch as she sits up a little, biting the inside of her cheek as she crosses her arms over her chest. "okay then, what did you mean? you know i want to go to your little events, i just don't have time."
you roll your eyes at the use of "little events," you knew she didn't value your sport as much as hers, but it still hurt. "little event? that's what i meant, you don't value my things as much as your own! you and i both know that you could make it to the morning part of the meet and keep me company but you just work out with KK!"
you didn't mean to let out your feelings like that, you knew you wanted to talk to her but you hadn't meant to yell. "i'm sorry okay? i don't know what more i can give you." nika wasn't breaking eye contact with you, she wanted to see your complete reaction to her words. it was not a good reaction.
"you're sorry? tell me what you're sorry for. i doubt you could." it's your turn to cross your arms as you stare up at her, her face never showing what she was thinking.
"i'm sorry your silly little pool tricks aren't as important to me as warming up. i'm sorry i have priorities." to say you were unhappy was an understatement. you close the computer that had been playing the movie up until that point, not even knowing how to react to that.
she thought your sport was "silly little pool tricks?" you took a deep breath, nodding. "okay, well then, you can leave then." you weren't slow to notice the scared look on her face. she knew she had messed up, she also knew there may not be a way to come back from this.
"no, c'mon baby, you know it wasn't meant to come out like that. i just, i have other things to be thinking about." you stand up, still heading to the door, opening it for her. "okay, then go think about them. somewhere else."
you weren't thinking, just letting out everything you had been feeling for months. you watched as she nodded, grabbing a few things before walking out of the room and right out the front door. you didn't cry until she left. she thought that little of you?
a few hours later, you got a call from paige.
"hello?" you answered the phone confused, paige never called you. "hey, um i heard about what happened, i wanted to make sure you're okay, nika is all sorts of mixed up." she seemed sincere, which led you to talk to her for almost two hours about the situation. you had felt bad taking up so much of her time.
"it's just, i don't get it, i mean i cheer her on in everything she does. this is the one thing i am the most passionate about, and she barely cares! i just feel shitty, like im less important to her." you had shed a couple of tears in the time you had been on the phone, not knowing who else to talk to.
"mhm, well, i think you should give it some time. don't go reaching back to her, let her come to you. let her know what she's missing." you nod, her words causing you to come up with a plan.
-
UConn won the meet over Georgetown the following day, causing you to go out to dinner with some of your closer teammates. durning your meal you got two messages.
paige 🏀: good job at the meet today! i wish i had time to stop by and watch
nika 😚: hey, can we talk, please? today was really hard and i miss you.
you replied to one message, thanking paige, and letting her know you appreciated her reaching out. you would text nika back later.
you didn't.
instead, you got one too many drinks at dinner and ended up calling paige. you didn't do anything too wild, just, you know, told her everything you had been feeling about nika for the second time. which, wouldn't be an issue had you let her talk when she first picked up. but, because someone is praying on your downfall, you hadn't been made aware that paige was currently with nika.
and nika heard you.
not that big of a deal.
-
it had been almost a week since your horrible phone call with paige. it was friday night, you were trying to wind down for the night, choosing to watch a random movie.
you had done everything to prepare for your swim meet the following morning, it wouldn't be particularly hard, the team not having the best stats by any means.
you fell asleep early that night, missing a text from paige.
"see you at the meet tomorrow morning, bright and early!"
-
you wake up the next morning by putting your phone directly on do not disturb, not bothering to check any messages. you needed to be in the right head space.
you arrived at the pool at 7, getting your events and warming up. your first event was at 8:15, 200 butterfly, it would be easy.
standing on the block, you look up to see paige and nika.
holy fuck. 
the whistle blew almost directly after, and you had a delayed start, causing you to start behind. the whole way back and forth you were thinking about paige and nika.
there was no way you had just seen them, they had a game later, they should be practicing? your thoughts had clouded your mind, and you were lagging behind on the last lap. you caught up quickly, barely pulling through in the last few seconds.
getting out of the water in a huff, you walk over to your teammates, taking off your cap and goggles. as you chat with one of your closer friends you see them again. no way it wasn't them.
you quickly excused yourself to go talk to them.
"paige?" she turns around with a smile on her face, nika not far behind. "hey! we decided to stop by and see what all the hype was about," you nod, looking to see nika holding what looked to be a bouquet of your favorite flowers.
"hype is a reach, but thanks. um, so you watched that?" you flustered thinking about nika watching you struggle so much in a simple 200. "yeah, you were really good, and like super fast. i had no idea it was so complicated, i think you swim faster than i run." you looked as nika stunned, you hadn't thought you did good, but to her it was amazing.
"really? that was like, my slowest time ever, i sucked." you laugh a little, noticing paige slowly slip away to find people she could befriend. "seriously?" you nodded, smiling at her shocked face.
"listen, im sorry about what i said, i was embarrassingly uneducated on this, seriously i thought you just did a little free stroke and left. oh! and here, these are um, for you." you watched as she held up the flowers, taking them with a smile on your face.
"thanks babe, they're beautiful." you take them from her, smirking as you see her cheeks flush. "um, i have another event in like twenty minutes, but if you want to come with me to put these in my locker you can." you guys chat the whole time up until your event, and then the whole time after.
"oh my gosh, what time is your game? and where the hell did paige go?" you grab her wrist as you get on your tippy toes to look around, causing her to laugh. "our game isn't for another two hours, we'll be fine, thought we should get going soon."
you nod, upset that she couldn't stay for the whole day, but understanding that she stayed as long as possible. she found paige a few minutes later, mingling with some other girls on the team. you rolled your eyes as you heard her complain about being in the middle of a conversation, smiling to yourself.
"okay, ill see you guys later. oh and hey, text me when you're done with the game, we can get dinner." you smile, kissing nika on the cheek and hugging paige goodbye as you watch them leave.
you guys would definitely be having a talk at dinner.
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elzorton · 5 months
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When you're chilling in the tiki bar and the idiots you're gonna send to the moon gives the nightmare-cautionary-children's-tale a nuke.
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dumb-doll-lips · 3 months
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Maybe controversial, but on posts about being dumb where girls are like saying ‘but I’m actually smart.’ Like tbh, I don’t really believe them. Like if you’re smart why does feeling dumb feel so good or hot or whatever to you then? I kinda feel like it’s having an excuse to let go of trying as much as you would be when you’re saying your smart. If you’re like really actually smart, I don’t feel like a break from ‘being smart’ would be such a relief or like as appealing.
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thevioletcaptain · 8 months
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if you as a fic reader ever become possessed by the urge to do a popularity bracket with the fics other people wrote and shared for fun and for free, consider:
don't ❤️ 
#just!!!! make a rec list!!!!!!!!!#popularity contests do nothing but drive writers out of fandoms by pitting people against their friends#and invariably result in people being assholes in the comments as if the people who wrote the fic can't see it#like ''oh clearly fic x is better than fic y''#or ''why is fic c even in this poll?''#nobody gains anything by you doing a bracket to see which fic is the ''most popular''#a stat which could be found more easily & less cruelly by simply hitting the sort by bookmarks/kudos button on ao3#anyway ugh. i saw that one of my fics was being pitted against one of my friend's fics in this bracket that's going around#and i have no idea who is ''winning'' because i refuse to look. but either way it's gonna feel bad!!!#because i want my friend to get his flowers so i want him to win!!! but i also would like to know that people like my fic!!!!#so it's just a lose/lose situation even though i generally don't give a shit about numbers#but this turns it into a schoolyard popularity thing#and the emotional response to having people *vote* on if your work is *better or worse* than other fic is hard to ignore#cannot reiterate enough JUST MAKE A REC LIST#or if you absolutely must do a bracket like this do it in a private chat server or something#don't create a public forum for people to pass value judgements where the authors can see it#and feel bad if they get told their fic is ''worse'' than someone elses#but also feel bad if they get told theirs is ''better'' because it came at the cost of telling another author they weren't good enough#ANYWAY i still feel sick with a super sore throat and a headache & am probably extra cranky because of it#(still testing negative thankfully so it's probably just weather/allergen related)#gonna go make some tea and prep the fic updates i want to post today#cass says things#fandom problems#wank adjacent
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bonefall · 7 months
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where’s that little horror piece about kits never growing up in Starclan? because I remember it so vividly but I can’t find it.
The one about Bright Stream?
Weird that it's so hard to find! It's probably because it's got such heavy tags lmao.
I really mean it though like, canon's permakitten system and the idea that Bright Stream is up there, forever taking care of fetus children who were filled by sudden knowledge and yet never grow past that point absolutely horrifies me. Jesus Christ. I don't know how anyone reads that final scene in Path of Stars and isn't filled with itching, white-hot existential dread, man.
Sometimes you just gotta write horror about it. ¯\_(ツ)_/¯
#partner and i were joking the other day about how like#they are the one known as The Horror Blogger and im the funny cat guy#because it's literally the opposite irl. you have NO idea#They are the one who is squeamish and I am the one that is like#only scared if there's 17 different kinds of existential horror#Which tbf is important in my line of work#But let me tell YOU. One thing that gets me every time? Fucked up afterlives#Probably from all the religious trauma but. Still.#''turns out your whole life is actually teetering on the precipice of a steep drop into the jaws of unknowable gods--#and their concept of omnibenevolent and omnimalevolent are self-defined''#''in death your life only has meaning to those still living and yet you're conscious to experience it''#''you will helplessly watch people you thought loved YOU reduce your memory into how you SERVED them''#''Powerless to stop it you will find that you were only valued as a tool in someone else's life''#''There is no peace in death just being tired and uncomfortable forever''#EURGH#It's why my most feared monsters are actually ghosts and vampires and certain zombies#Because it's not really about the monster it's more about what that monster implies for the afterlife#Certain zombies especially. ngl. Night of the livin dead 2 has the scariest ones ever#Intelligent. Violent. Able to FEEL themselves rotting and the only relief is to consume everything you ever loved#BRR#they did eat a bunch of cops tho so... at least they have that going for them#BONES MCRAMBLES IN THE TAGS#bone babble
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kurozu501 · 5 months
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the thing that really bothers me about the whole demon racism thing in Frieren is the extremely heavy handed flashback we get justifying Frieren's prejudice. its a whole ridiculous series of events that make no sense. Felt like some gross propaganda.
Lemme break it down real fast: in the past Frieren and her pals came to a town where a demon in the shape of a young girl attacked and killed a child. They defeated it in battle, but Himmel was hesitant to kill it because it looked like a kid and called out 'mother.' The village chief then comes in and says that killing the demon will make them just as bad as them, and that they should offer her a chance at redemption. Some time passes with the demon girl living with the chief and his daughter peacefully before suddenly one night she kills the chief. She presents the chief's unconscious daughter to the parents of the girl she killed saying she wanted to get them a replacement child. Himmel and Frieren kill her, Fireren explains that demons don't even have families so her calling out 'mother' was just a manipulation tactic. which the dying demon girl confirms is correct.
So,
2 things
Why the fuck did the chief come in saying they had to give the demon a chance when she'd already murdered someone? Why was everyone besides Frieren and the dead kids parents just cool with letting a child murderer get off scott free and walk around their town with no consequences? Generally we don't even let human child murderers do that, so its frankly bizarre. If you want to prove demons are fundamentally evil wouldn't it make more sense to start with a demon who hasn't yet committed any crime? Then the chief sticking up for it would feel logical. Whole thing makes no sense except to demonize (lol) the very concept of redemption. No you stupid fucking idiot you should have used extreme violence and murder every time always. its always justified, learn your lesson kids and if you see one of the Evil Races walking around remember its always ok to lynch them.
What the fuck is the demon child doing here? Her actions make no sense. Frieren says that demons are basically just intelligent predators, that they only use speech and social customs to manipulate humans and prey on them. So why on earth did the demon kid murder the chief while Himmel and squad were still in town? Why'd she have a weird fixation on getting the parents a new kid? Almost as if she was trying to make up for what she'd done to them in a twisted way, as if she felt bad? This seems to imply the opposite of what Frieren said. While watching i assumed what would happen is that Frieren would tell Himmel and the group that they should pretend to leave the village, then double back whereupon they'd find the demon going on a rampage again, since she would assume its now safe to do so with them gone. i assumed that because it would make sense. but nah. instead we get this really nonsensical series of events that clearly exists only to prove frieren's bigotry right. Demon girl is so ridiculous she literally uses her last words to be like "btw this lady who killed me was right you should never trust filthy demons like meeee." Give me a break.
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lord-squiggletits · 8 months
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I need to reread the comics again to have specific arguments/evidence for this, but like
I feel a bit like I could've been sympathetic to the way other Cybertronian colonies view Cybertron, if it weren't for the fact that at least several of them (as in, ones that get notable dialogue/screen time) are so low-key self-righteous?
Like, idk... there's a lot of criticism of Cybertronians because they're so "warlike" and how their obsession with violence and vengeance is just dragging the whole galaxy down with them, but uh. The Autobot-Decepticon war was basically a product of societal ills bubbling over for like 6 million years beforehand and then finally boiling over into a 4 million year war that lasted as long as it did because the people involved had immense social/psychological trauma from being "raised" in an oppressive society.
So when the colonists come in being all 'omg you people are so violent and uncivilized why don't you just like, stop fighting' it kind of pissed me off a little bit as a reader/person like. Idk the colonists really came into this society of people full of massive amounts of trauma where even before the war society was super oppressive and no one has any experience of living "normal" lives unaffected by violence and bigotry. And the colonists were like "ummm wow why don't you guys just??? stop fighting???." Like idk it wasn't EVERY SINGLE MOMENT, in fact I think that when it was played for laughs it's quite a funny "fridge horror" type element. It was just annoying because like.... IDK???? It's just really annoying to watch a bunch of people who lived relatively sheltered lives on their own planets come to a different planet full of traumatized people and be like "omg why are you people so fucked up" IDK BRO MAYBE BECAUSE THEIR SOCIETY WAS OPPRESSIVE AND THEY LIVED THROUGH A LIFELONG WAR???
It also doesn't help that the colonies were literally founded based on imperialism and conquest so like, it's fucking rich to hear colonists scolding Cybertronians for their violence ruining the whole galaxy while literally sitting on planets that their Primes colonized from others. The hypocrisy of this is briefly mentioned in Unicron (literally the FINAL STORY OF THE SERIES) but like, that's basically the only time Cybertronian characters are given a reprieve of sympathy from other characters in universe and it's so tiresome.
I've talked to other people who didn't like the colonists and thought they basically (narratively speaking) existed just to shit on the existing characters, and it's actually really easy for me to sympathize with/outright agree with that assessment of the story considering how much of exRID/OP seems to be preoccupied with "Cybertron/the Primes/Optimus sucks" with very few reprieves for anything positive happening and even fewer chances for characters to get to explain themselves and experience a little bit of justice? Like, as the audience, it's just very frustrating to see the characters you spent hundreds of issues keeping up with get shit on by a bunch of "literally-who"s and then not really get a chance to ever defend themselves, either by literally defending themselves in conversation or having some sort of narrative thing happening that vindicates them at least symbolically
#squiggposting#paused work to muse about this which i prolly shouldn't have lol#oh well i'll still get stuff done#like idk an example of this is how pyra criticized OP for using religion to manipulate people#(lets just ignore how she said she would teach OP but never actually did)#but in the story there's never any sort of confrontation where pyra learns about history or talks with OP#and OP gets to be like. yeah on my planet primes fucking sucked and i'm the only one trying to redeem their image#also ive been fighting an endless war that lasted 4 mil years in which me being a shining figurehead was basically#the sole motivating force keeping my army from just collectively succumbing to endless despair#and i also had to use this shining figurehead image i had to keep the opposing army from genociding a bunch of organics#like not once does OP get to express his side of things he's basically just shit upon endlessly by other characters as he keeps doing plot#i feel like i had another example but i can't recall who/what was involved lmao#like idk it's not just that barber's writing is depressing and dark and edgy. i LIKE stories that do that kind of thing#it's just that it feels a bit as if the story is ENDLESSLY depressing and dark and edgy with almost no reprieve#as if it's mostly presenting the flaws of the characters with no chance for them to justify or redeem themselves#idk i feel like there was another better point/example i was gonna make but i can't remember it#like idk i guess a dark depressing story would've been better if the characters at least got to defend themselves#bc as is it basically feels like they (esp OP) get shit on endlessly and never once get to express anything about it#so like. they get shit on in universe. but also as the reader since there's never a contradicting viewpoint or the character defending them#it's as if you're supposed to take this one-sided criticism of them at face value and it just doesn't seem fair AS THE READER#if i read about OP getting shit on by some people and defended by others and also him expressing his opinion on himself#then that just feels like a normal fair narrative where i get to take sides#but if it's just OP being shit on and he hardly expresses much about it#then it feels like i as the reader am expected to agree with the portrayal being shown?#but in reality the portrayal just feels negative and unfair and one sided to me#and why the fuck do i want to read a story that's just the characters i know and like on an endless shame parade#also shout out to 'literally who' aka slide calling OP 'literally fascist' lmao#one of the most cringe moments of the entire comic. wait no. i can think of a more cringe Slide Moment#when unicron is about to destroy the planet and trypticon is getting shot and dying(?) in the background#and the story decides to pause and focus on Slide so she can monologue about how evil and tyrannical OP is
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musical-chick-13 · 30 days
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Regarding the previous post, I think the way I approach trying to evaluate a piece of art is asking "Do I think the positive things I get out of it outweigh the parts of it that I don't like?" And when I call something a "guilty pleasure" song/show/book/piece of media/etc. it's really more in the sense of, "Given who I am as a person, the flaws I've found in this should be complete dealbreakers for me, but somehow they aren't, and it makes me feel like I'm having an identity crisis."
#like. I think something like...idk shiki or cxgf excels on multiple levels. I understand why I like them. given the things I look for in art#it makes sense that these shows would speak to me because they make the effort to showcase those things I look for. because the people#in charge of those works clearly valued the same kinds of things and cared about seriously exploring them.#but with something like. uh. ctrlz. that is NOT the case and I frequently found myself going 'why would anyone make this writing#decision?' but I still sat through all 3 seasons of it! I still really enjoyed it! those flaws SHOULD have made me give up according to#personal history but they never did. and I very very much genuinely question why. I have NO IDEA why I still care about this#silly convoluted teen drama show so much. but I do. I wrote SO MANY FUCKING POSTS ABOUT IT.#I really love wicked the musical. I've heard many people call it 'hokey' or 'cheesy' or 'objectively bad' but here's the thing! I DON'T#think it's bad!!! like literally at all!!!!!! and it does do some genuinely cool things in regard to the music and the way the characters#develop and what the show says about the nature of prejudice and human connection. is it like. idk Serious™ the way that something like#Parade is? no. but it doesn't have to be. it does what it sets out to do and it does it well and this is why the whole '''objective#evaluation''' thing doesn't actually mean anything. I value thoughtfully-constructed music and dynamic female characters#(which this musical has). I value stories that deal with the complex and messy feelings that come with being a human (which this musical#has). I value stories about 'other'ness and romantic subplots that aren't just built on 'This Girl Is Pretty' (which this musical has).#and I value professional displays of technical vocal ability because I know how fucking DIFFICULT that is (which this musical...if you cast#it well...has).#if you value something else in a musical then yeah you will probably think THIS one is '''objectively bad'''#if you don't see the point of musicals as an art form you will probably think wicked is '''objectively bad'''#do you see where the problem with categorizing analysis like this is??
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itspileofgoodthings · 8 months
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me to Nina yesterday: explaining how due to a headache and exhaustion I wasted away the end of my afternoon just watching Ryan Gosling interviews
Nina, instantly sympathetic: and I completely understand that, a valid thing to do
#the thing about Nina is that most of the time she not only hates my coping mechanisms she also plain doesn’t understand them#one of the many tensions of our relationship#but she was just 100% like yeah. I fully get it#and it made me feel so much better#my relationship with Nina the work of a lifetime because the moments of mutual understanding are so rare#but so powerful when they happen. and it takes years to discover that sudden gold#(my mom is often so troubled by our relationship. she’s just like (whisper voice): do you guys even like each other)#because we’re just SO sparks fly (antagonistic version) in many of our interactions#and it’s just like. YEAH. We’re just going to have an intense altercation and clashing of opinions viewpoints values and perspectives#at least every other day. LOL#but we will navigate it!#no one on the planet I smooth things over with as fast as Nina. it is lightning-speed reconciliation#because we both move on so quickly in the same way. in that the mood will just lift#we got in a fight the other day. Nina left and stormed out. 10 minutes later I get a text going#‘I’m sorry Maria. I should not have said that about your mother’#which made me laugh because we weren’t fighting about our mom. She just likes to quote Jacqueline from ever after sometimes out of context#and my mom was on the couch watching me like ‘you’re reconciled???? It’s over?????????’#because my mom a) is so different from both of us in the speed she processes in and b) has no sisters#0 sisters. 4 daughters. and she still isn’t used to it lol. because my mom’s strength and weakness is that she never gets used to anything!#ALSO Nina told me the other day that I’m the one that taught her to apologize because I would just make her do it when we were kids#not to me but to other people! I would just sit there and explain how verbal acknowledgement of wrongdoing would make things better#and she was always like ‘ughhh I hate it so much. FINE’ because she always does want to make things better#anyway this SHOOK ME TO MY CORE. Because I never thought Nina actually internalized any of the things I’ve said to her ever lol#and she was like ‘yeah you gave me that good habit’#(I love apologizing. Love to put it into words and I have an intense need to do it immediately and thoroughly)#(tbh it’s only with time that I’ve come to see that other people do not work that way. and need more time. and are not just —#instantly comfortable putting everything into words especially the hard things)#(because it’s not like I’m always driven by more charity and compunction. I just ducking HATE unresolved things not put into words)#(so it helps me feel better. and sometimes you just gotta learn to not say it right away if it’s only going to make things worse#(or learn to say it in different way without words. that actually communicates the sorrow. And that can sometimes look like giving space!)
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perenlop · 11 months
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i get the frustration with so many villains now getting treatment like “oh they had a sucky childhood so actually you need to feel bad for them and not hold them accountable for their actions” but the counter of “this person was born evil and cant ever grow and its pathetic to assume that they can, also people cant be redeemed no matter what and this is fantastic writing actually” is so exhausting. 
#like... no one is born grinning maliciously with a knife out the womb. no one starts out that way#and anything thats ever tried to portray a character that way at birth has only ever been ironically funny#idk its annoying when people are like ''actually its more interesting that the character doesnt have a motive for killing people''#like. coming off of bullet train rn but even ''this character otherwise has a perfect life but they accidentally killed and now theyre#fascinated with all the ways people can die'' is more interesting than ''idk thats just how they are *shrugs*''#like yes someone can have the perfect upbringing and social life and still turn out to be sadistic but you can still work with that#as opposed to ''they were born evil thats just how they were always gonna be SORRY''#like. idk go into that ''perfect social life and family''. what did that family value? what were the friends like?#what did that person experience outside of those things? what did they consume?#did their social standing actually breed some sort of entitlement to them? do they perhaps freak out if something doesnt go their way?#are they insecure deep down? does that drive them to it? are they a perfectionist? do they assume peoples feelings?#i remember reading this wc fancomic that explained why a character was evil and like her mom died#and the attention from her mothers death made her obsessed with being fawned over so she started medical abuse#and letting her patients die so that people would fawn over her the same way every time#and the op was like ''HEY before you yell at me shes NOT evil bc her mom died ok she was gonna turn out evil no matter what''#like... no no go into the emotional vulnerability implied there. go into the morbid introduction to slow death at a young age#go into the potential desensitization go into that. youre already willing to make her multifauceted and with positive traits#why are you afraid of implying shes even SOMEWHAT sympathetic and just want to say she was gonna do that regardless#and i fault the atmosphere around this stuff most of all like we should never have implied that giving a villain a reason to be evil#was stupid woobifying bullshit that was out of touch with reality#echoed voice
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