#sorry tumblr i keep forgetting about you guys | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

apollo-cackling · 9 months

Note

🔥 GR Reviews (no idea what those are, but now I'm curious)

oh I was referring to Goodreads reviews lol which is why I was holding myself back from complaining. that dead horse is pretty thoroughly beaten to disintegration fjajdj

but hm... okay like, yeah the top reviews of any book on GR are all unreliable and bad taken on face value but they're so consistently unreliable in specific ways that it kinda loops back to being reliable? the site is like. fine if you can find folks with similar tastes to yours and whose judgment you trust. ends up kinda being like how tumblr works except searching any topic always returns the most mundanely bad takes you've ever seen.

(so basically it sucks at a pre big proportion of what it's supposed to do but it's. decent. at the rest which.... yeah)

also aside from all the other problems w/ the posts lamenting the state of GR, I feel like a lot of them are missing that a pretty big reason why (the most visible) reviews on GR are bad is just bc in the ranking of things a review needs to reach the top, being. good. is near the bottom. so in my experience the distribution of bad opinions are like most other sites, it's just that it's always the bad ones that are the most visible. like goodreads reviews are also an endless source of frustration to me and I will absolutely complain about them in private, but I don't see the point in (publically) complaining about them?

(I could elaborate on how I've seen GR select for bad reviews but if you've seen any of the talk about youtube's algorithm and how it selects for mid stuff it's nothing all that new lol)

that's probably not all that much of an unpopular opinion uhh. I respect what Storygraph is trying to do, but it's fighting a losing battle I think. as much as GR being owned by amazon makes it suck (gods the website/app is godawful), that also gives GR several advantages that other sites are hard-pressed to contest (the kindle's goodreads integration is a pretty major reason why I'm still using both goodreads and kindle for example).

#thanks for the ask!#shrug I don't much have much new to say about goodreads lol sorry #+ apologies if this doesn't make sense I'm pretty tired rn dsajkgh #if you want something to *really* complain about I can dm you this review of baru1 that's my mortal enemy #I usually just ignore the guy bc his tastes are really different from mine but like this is. really bad even for him #unfortunately he's like one of the top reviewers for epic fantasy if you read epic fantasy at all he's pretty inescapable #my rambles #ask #ask game #goodreads to me is how folks describe tumblr lol yk #place suuucks on so many different levels but I'm so used to it that I just stick with it #GR integration is annoyingly useful for me lol if I'm using say an excel spreadsheet I'd probably keep forgetting to put books on there #main reason I don't see myself switching to storygraph yk #idk how kobo ereaders work maybe it'd be possible to jailbreak it and install some plugin that gives it storygraph integration #but on the kindle front I'm pretty sure there's still no way to jailbreak the current firmware #+ keeping a kindle jailbroken requires keeping it offline so yk #'GR to me is how folks describe tumblr' or maybe not bc GR to me is 'I don't hate it enough to try the alternatives'#and I'm pretty sure the general attitude to tumblr is a lot more positive than that lol #I have spent. way too much time on GR

0 notes

tiredlinguist · 9 months

Text

ogh

#sorry but what the FUCK is wrong with me oh my god #i need a therapist i need 27 therapists #im so so so so so so fucking obsessed with fucking men #every time i think ive gotten used to it #it gets worse. what the fuck #t really is doing a number on me huh.#it’s almost off putting how bad it is #like the majority of the time it’s just fun and funny and super affirming #but when it gets bad it’s so bad. and it feels really wrong and isolating #im kind of…i don’t wanna say disgusted but definitely weirded out by the frequency and intensity with which i think about sex lol #should not put this on tumblr no sir. people i know in real life follow this account. whatever.#you guys can cope. im trying to cope with weekly injections that are turning me into a 13yo.#ive not been taking my meds either shit i keep fucking FORGETTING i swear!!!#whatever whatever whatever whatever. im so fine this is so normal.#i just wanna get high and watch tv and sleep but im gonna run out of money at some point #god #okay. ok ok ok #i can do this i can be normal and have such normal thoughts in my head #i need this all to settle down soon before i just lose my mind because #there’s about a bajillion million jjfkdekjrrjillion men in their forties that i can’t stop thinking about #little faggot ass loser am i even bi anymore #i am. probably. im pretty sure. just. god DAMN

0 notes

nc-vb · 1 year

Note

DONT FORGET ROT FOR THE MALE MOANING AUDIOS

My dear, I'm going to use this ask of yours as a catalyst... All of my personal favourite ASMRs, vids, etcetera... beneath the cut. Not all of them are only male moaning! Literally just all my faves I've collected LOL.

Links will not only be audios; a majority of them are videos.

Links will be from any of the following: Twitter, the Hub, Audiomack, Soundgasm, and likely other sites, so be prepared because they're not labeled, lol. And sorry if any of the links are repeated; my bad.

BUT YES, THE MALE MOANING AUDIOS UGH 😮‍💨

BLUE TEXT MEANS NEW LINKS HAVE BEEN ADDED.

Links with sparkles are my personal faves.

Edited, more added July 21, 2023

CerberosVA Now, if y'all like your man extremely vocal, if you like whimpering, or lowkey, you like the whole subby bf thing, PLEASE, THIS MAN, I cannot recommend his shit enough. He's on twt, the hub, probably the mack; please support his official work on Patreon, if you can.

x | x | x | x | x | x | x | x | x | x | x

softxwarm (hub) This guy does both asmr and stuff with his girlfriend, but his solo ASMRs are pretty coo'. I'll just share my top three since you can just sift through his videos, anyway.

one (video; solo) | two (video; solo) | three (video; solo)

moonxx911 (twt) ANYTHING by this man. I won't even both being specific; I listen to his shit on repeat, rotated.

Akiradubs (hub) He mostly does character dub audios, but he has some simpler ones that I enjoy, like this one.

one (audio, gn!; sub male, ig?)

RedactedASMR I haven't gotten so deep into the lore of it, but Redacted has a whole series of ASMRs that tell long ass stories, so if you have the time, I recommend searching him out. I believe most of them are on YouTube? Personally, Lasko is my favourite (he's so cute with the stuttering, ughhhh). I'm just going to link my personal Redacted playlist I've started, rather than link specific ones. You can find him on more platforms, but I don't think his n/sfw ASMRs are on Youtube... idk.

ncvb RedactedASMR playlist (the mack)

SeikyuuVA (hub; also on the mack) Look, Seikyuu isn't everyone's flavour... there's only a couple specific ones I enjoy, just because he really goes over the top with the sounds and aggression sometimes, LMAO, and it gives me second hand embarrassment...

Lxvesickk (twt) Just found him, hehe. Just listen…

WickLuvsU (twt) His audios are... immaculate.

X | X (play these both at the same time... you're welcome.)

Video Links, general

1 | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 | 6 | 7 | 8 | 9 | 10 11 | 12 | 13 | 14 | 15 | 16 | 17 | 18 ✨ | 19 | 20

21 | 22 ✨ | 23 ✨ | 24 | 25 ✨ | 26 | 27 | 28 ✨ | 29 ✨| 30 31 | 32 | 33 | 34 | 35 ✨| 36 ✨| 37 | 38 | 39 ✨| 40 ✨

41 | 42 | 43 | 44 | 45 (mmf✨)| 46 (aud✨)|

Video Links, mlm

I had to put these links in a separate post because I reached Tumblr's 100 link-per-post limit? Didn't know that was a thing. So, please find them here! There's about 80+ links.

Video Links, wlw

1 | 2 | 3

Characters Like, the fake dubs. I dunno what they're called.

Hanma Shuji (hub, audio; Akiradubs) Zhongli (hub, audio; Akiradubs) Akira/Joker (hub, audio; Seikyuu) Take this Audiomack link, too; it's my other personal playlist that has a shit ton of character ASMR dubs on it, and then some...

I'll have more to add along the way; keep an eye on the update date!

#twt links #asmr #n/sft asmr #n/sfw asmr #idk what else to tag this?#male moan #voice kink #✦ nice chats.#priya<333 #✦ nc vb.

3K notes · View notes

tocomplainfriend · 3 months

Text

SEE!? THEY DON'T CARE!

TW: Rape, SA, Homophobia, Misogyny, Misandry

The specific censored word with "-", it's for my own reasons and comfort. It's not censored up and in tags due to filtering! Sorry if I made mistakes like forgetting of filtering or similar, I haven't used tumblr much before!

THIS IS A R-PE JOKE! THAT'S WHAT I HAVE BEEN FUCKING SAYING! ONE OF MY BIGGEST PROBLEMS WITH EPISODE 4 IS THE FACT OF "we want to write an empowering story about men getting sexually assaulted. Men victim don't get that attentio-" BITCH, YOU MADE MANY R-PE AND SA JOKES ALL THE FUCKING WAY THROUGH HELLUVA AND KNOW HAZBIN! You are the one making fun of scenarios where your male characters get assaulted or r-ped.

HOW TF DO YOU PRETEND TO BE SOOO ABOVE PEOPLE (INCLUDING VICTIMS OF SA AND R-PE) THAT'S EXPRESSED HOW THEY FELT ON THE EXECUTIONS AND WHO WORKED IN EPISODE 4. WHEN YOU YOURSELF MAKE JOKES ABOUT IT????? For some context, Sir Pent is trying to get with Cherri, but always deflects first in case she rejects him. He offers her a drink, but immediately says it's because he'll buy a drink for everyone on the club. Then he asks Cherri if they can have sex- and deflects back (a repetition joke) "Because I'll have sex with everyone here". Then he gets dragged into a room by other people, yelling wait and no! And the door closes as you heard him scream.

Out of context in the screenshot, you might even think it might be a serious scene where something happens to Pentious. BUT NO! IT'S BRUSHED OVER REAL FAST AND PLAYED AS "HAHA SOMETHING BAD HAPPEN TO SIR PENTIOUS AGAIN LMAOO"- it's the punchline.

Then at the end of the episode he gets out asking "Where is Cherri" (who btw is having sex with a random guy).

And please don't say "Well, he asked for it"- you know how you sound. The whole point of the joke is that he is trying to get with Cherri and failing astronomically. The point here is that he really doesn't want to have sex with a bunch of random people, but he has to do it because he is getting dragged into a room. (Again, Pentious is like Moxxie Their joke it's getting trashed and bullied by the world or people around them).

You made a whole episode about dealing with a male character's sexual assault, abuse or r-pe. Saying how much you respect victims, and your episode, it's just perfect about the topic. BlaBlaBla- no, you don't. You made all this jokes since HB season 1. This new joke was episode 6 of HH. You never acknowledge power dynamics, or coercion. You never acknowledge anything bad in your show.

Remember, as much as this shows go for LGBTQ+ representation and Queer media. As a ""Female lead show"". This jokes link back (not only to making fun of SA and R-pe itself, but to) homophobia and Misogyny. A scenario of where a man gets SA'ed or r-ped by another man or woman- leads to a scenario where the character is made fun of for not being "masculine enough" for being a victim or for not being able to defend themselves. In a scenario where this happens by a man to man, "It's funny because the victim is viewed as gay. As less masculine = gay and that's bad cause gay = weak and feminine and the idea of feminine = weak".

(There are a few jokes here and there, like Blitzo touching Moxxie's dick after making fun of him for having a baby penis.)

If you didn't notice, Moxxie gets attacked by multiple succubus, and that's apparently funny. KEEP IN MIND is not basic physical violence-no he comes out with lipstick kisses marks, the sounds effects are (ugh)... and Blitz tells him "Don't let them access any of your holes". In other concepts, I want to point out that the times when Moxxie is viewed as a bottom or feminine- he is made fun of. When Millie pegs him, he is made fun of because he is the man of the relationship, being implied as the bottom. When he wears the outfit of unhappy campers, he is extra objectified or made fun of even more than in any other episodes. He is also forcefully put on a dress in his wedding.

He is made fun of for being SA'ed for being uncomfortable scenarios:

These aren't jokes made by characters that "are bad because they are from hell". These are scripted jokes written by a person searching for the audience to laugh.

AND the reason why many audiences accept this jokes or even find them funny is because of some of these views (internalized or not) above. You'll also notice how all these jokes are directed at men (if you find an R-pe or SA joke directed at a woman in this two show, say something about it! POINT IT OUT!). People accept and write these jokes more because they care less about the idea of a man being a victim of such situation. More often than not- in the present, a woman getting assaulted or anything similar in any media gets noticed and called out. THESE JOKES OR THE NORMALIZATION OF SEXUAL HARASSMENT, ASSAULT, COERCION, OR SIMILAR TOWARDS WOMAN STILL HAPPENS!!!! There is an idea that men just tend to just want sex all times at any time. -And that a man getting SA'ed or r-ped by a woman it's just sex, cause "Why wouldn't you like free pussy". When it's a gay perpetrator is viewed as funny cause "that makes you gay or a woman" and that's apparently hilarious. Men can be r-ped no matter what. Men can be targets of all of these acts.

Remember that all the scenes of sexual abuse, harassment and r-pe in Poison are directed by the R2. Who, once again, is into r-pe porn- and they themselves said they are not an SA victim either. So remember, not even a victim trying to cope with their own R-pe or SA. This person draws and ships "R-pe ships", and tags it as "naughty men uwu" bullshit. Also, a person so obsessed with the character of Angel that they changed their name to Tony (Angel's real human name), make themselves look like him, and become a sex worker like Angel. They themselves looked at a comic of Val threatening r-pe and abuse on Angel as "thank good you have balls to draw something mean with these too, I was so bored" ???? (this stuff is in:) and cosplay and take photos of your Val x Angel ship

Congrats if you as a victim yourself thought that the scene with Angel was good. If it helped you be and feel seen. But remember the rest of the show, the hypocritical writers, don't care enough to view it as a serious topic to not joke about. Both HB and HH written by the same people (as in Vivziepop), take their sweet time to turn these topics into jokes.

What pisses off more, it's the trying to make yourself be viewed as a sensitive person about such topic. Make it seem like you are a savior for writing about it in such "serious, powerful and not sugar coded" way. But then you drop that on the fucking ground to make a joke about it when you are tired of pretending you are so good. If you were so informed of SA and r-pe, you wouldn't be making these jokes. If you knew how much SA male victims struggle to get viewed as serious or their stories taken into account-you wouldn't be this shitty.

God, you are so proud of the joke too.

My poor snake guy... one of the few characters that I like-

#vivziepop critique #vivziepop critical #helluva boss critique #helluva boss criticism #helluva boss critical #hazbin hotel critical #hazbin hotel criticism #hazbin hotel critique #anti vivziepop #tw sa #cw abuse #spindlehorse criticism #tw rape

361 notes · View notes

eitaababe · 1 year

Text

SOMEBODY ELSE !

— chapter 3. shut up.

series masterlist. | previous / next

next class ! — written portion below.

you walked into class the next day, hesitant to walk in. you peeked your head in awkwardly to see if ao'nung was there as kiri only quietly laughed at your antics, walking past you to her seat.

your eyes scanned the room and you breathed a sigh of relief when you didn't spot the boy, and you were about to walk in when you froze at the sound of an unfamiliar voice.

"hope you didn't forget about our deal, because i spent like seven bucks on your coffee."

shutting your eyes tightly and opening, and silently praying to eywa that this was a dream, you turned around, being met with his bright blue orbs.

"ah, how could i ever forget? i was promised free coffee." you played along, hoping he'd miss the way your cheeks turned pink at the sight of him.

eywa, he was even more attractive standing in front of you.

"well then, i hope your willing to keep your side of the deal." he smiled, handing your coffee to you before walking into the class, pulling out the seat beside his dramatically for you to sit in.

you rolled your eyes at his dramatic gesture and sat in the seat, trying hard to not let your face turn anymore red.

you pulled out your computer, your leg bouncing beneath the desk. ao'nung noticed this and smirked, his hand gently resting on top of your thigh, making you jump.

"calm down sweetheart, you're shaking in your seat," he smugly stated, making you softly groan into your hands. "i won't bite you, i promise. unless you're into that kinda thing. which is a bit weird, i guess, but to each their own."

"oh just shut up."

eywa decided to grace you just now, because before ao'nung could embarrass you once more the professor had arrived, and soon went into his lecture for the day.

"saved by the bell." ao'nung grinned, retracting his hand and finally focusing up.

you were in for a long class.

FUN FACTS !

— ao'nung asked neteyam for y/n's coffee order, that's why neteyam was reluctant to get her another one

— before y/n had an 8am class neteyam and her would spend mornings at her dorm and eat breakfast

— ao'nung pestered y/n throughout the whole lecture, and half the girls in class got jealous and hate her

a/n — ok i gotta know what team are you guys on / also i tried adding read more but tumblr hates me rn so sorry 😭

taglist / closed. @n7ytiri @ilovejakesullysdick @possysblog @love-chx @stars4deku @evphology @afro-hispwriter @ydsm-29 @tsireyasgf @goldeneywa @doulcha @krazy-kattzz @fucksnow @squid4 @blairrrrrr @neteyamforlife @dreamtogether2000 @444lyra @ambria @cawi00 @calums-betch @burntoutraven @powowowy @fadingpalacebonkpsychic @elegantkidfansoul @kolsmikaelson @mirikusashes @yukichan67 @goodiesinthecloset21 @netemoon @littlethingsinlife @coconut-dreamz @infamouslyclumsy @anm3mi @jjkclub @throwitbacktae @whoreforpomegranates @lolzies11 @ellasully @neteyamlvr11 @il0veheartz @liyahsocorro @nao-cchi @avatarlover21 @marcswife21 @drugs-for-memes @zendayaswrld101 @grierpilots @misscaller06 @erenjaegerwifee @lightskinloak @mommyneytiri @solaceinwritings @inluvwithneteyam @halibanana

1K notes · View notes

wittlesissyb4by · 3 months

Text

I'm sorry, what was that?!

Someone's being a very sassy sissy today! Are your panties too tight? Ohhhh that's right...you don't even get to wear panties! What is it you wear instead, loser?!

That's what I thought. You see, as your betasitter, I make the rules around here while your wife is gone, and I certainly won't be taking demands from someone with pissy pampers between their legs!

So why don't you put that paci back in your mouth to keep you quiet and help you remember your place. Your place is inside of a crib, dirtying diapers, and waiting for someone superior to change you.

Oh, and for that backtalk? You can forget about getting your diaper changed tonight before beddie byes! Better hold it. Maybe your wife will consider changing you when she gets back from her all-nighter with that Marcus guy...

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

New tumblr! Follow me here, Subscribestar, or Allmylinks to stay updated!

Another random place too: @wittle5i55ybaby Just in case.

192 notes · View notes

jinxremoving · 1 year

Text

ok but you see the thing with bob is that there are like a million other dudes in the scene who are just like him. like, my chem didn’t kick bob out because he was racist, in fact i’m like 90% sure that him making racist jokes didn’t even come up. when people sit around and act like gerard, frank & mikey are some sort of white saviors and banished bob for saying something racist, it’s like. not only are you patting their asses but also, it’s not that simple & it’s never that simple. we’ve heard gerard, frank & mikey laughing at racist jokes before, & mikey is still friends with bob to this day. they are not racist people imo but they are complicit in racism. they’re band guys from the 2000’s. and that’s just something you sort of have to accept & think about critically rather than just brush your hands of it. the hatred towards bob on this site is weird, not bc it’s unwarranted but because it always seems to conveniently forget and/or leave out the bits about him being racist. but at the same time, white people who go off about how racist bob is all the time are annoying too because it’s not just him. like there is a problem in the scene, and your white faves are not exempt from it. hell, even patrick stump was roommates with bob, like. i feel like white guilt makes many my chem fans here on tumblr lash out at bob so much, but like it’s not just him. at the same time though, it’s not like any of the guys in my chem are raging bigots, whether they still keep in touch with bob or not. i guess it’s a hard pill for people to swallow but basically anything you love will be, at some point or another, touched and affected by someone who is either actively racist, laughs at racist jokes, performs microaggressions, loves someone who is racist and/or keeps their mouth shut when an act of racism is happening right in front of them. and it’s not like “ah, well i simply can’t enjoy anything anymore,” you just gotta go in with nuance. bob isn’t some outlier, he’s every other scene dude from that time period. and it’s totally fine to clown on the guy if you wanna, whatever, but it’s just important to remember that like, if you’re a white person in bandom you are not as far away from being bob as you think you are, sorry. the only way out is through & if you really want to show that you care about poc you should be lifting us up, reading what we write, standing up for us & actively trying to change the scene

1K notes · View notes

writinganything · 2 months

Note

HI sooo I was wondering if you could write Soft Gwinam x reader from all of us are dead like in the apocalypse and like how it would go with those two like what would they do when he turns into like half zombie thing stuff like that (I don’t know if you do Soft Gwinam so sorry if you don’t😭😭😭)

Sorry I’ve left Tumblr for a bit but here it is

Warnings: Kinda depressing, talking about kys

He’d protect you at all costs

I feel like he would ask you if you want to become a halfbie like him. If you do, he would bite you the less painful he can. If you refuse, he’d still respect your decision.

He kills every zombies in a room and throw them out before hiding you there because he knows you would be too scared to stay near them even if they’re dead

He’s the one to go find food for you to eat

One day, when he was cuddling you to sleep, he confessed on how if something ever happened to him he wanted you to take his knife and look for Cheong-San and everyone else. Because even if he does everything to keep you happy and safe, what if something happens?

If you know your constellations/stars ect, I imagine you teaching them to him at night when the sky is clear. It makes the world stop for a while and you guys forget that flesh eating monsters are hunting you down.

He tries his best to make you forget about the apocalypse I could say. He goes to find food for you to eat, take a shower if it’s available and keep a conversation.

He teaches you how to survive

“I would still love you if you decide to go with them you know?…” he said one day, referring to the other survivors. He gets insecure about himself on if he can really protect you and that you must find him annoying or smtg but you always comfort him.

But after all this time in an apocalypse that didn’t seem to be ending, you were getting tired. Seeing your old friends now laying chasing you around to make you become one of them or laying dead on the ground was becoming too much for you to handle and your mental health had deteriorated. You haven’t had a proper meal in weeks and despite your efforts to keep it up…giving up didn’t look so bad.

Plus, your boyfriend’s rivalry with Cheong-San was upsetting because it was all he could talk about sometimes.

Ofc when Gwi-Nam saw your state, he blamed himself and damned the whole world for letting this happen.

The same night, you had an argument with Gwi-Nam.

You tried talking to him about how he should stop blaming everything on Cheong-San and because you were becoming sick of it, but he didn’t listen and took it personal. This soon transformed about your mental state, then how dangerous it was outside, then how he wants to make you join them to make you happier.

Then you started getting angry at how he wasn’t making any sense. He hated Cheong-San but wanted you with him and his friends??

“As long as you’re safe, I’m surviving and if I have to leave, I will” is the last thing he said.

The next day, you thought he was taking you out to take a shower like he usually does but instead, he took you somewhere else.

And there, there was your friends. Still alive.

You ran toward them, happy to see them and when you turned around, Gwi-Nam wasn’t there anymore.

Time went by and you missed your boyfriend, wondering how he was doing and where he was. The only updates you got were from Cheong-San.

Until there wasn’t any updates anymore. Cheong-San and Gwi-Nam were dead. From an explosion.

#all of us are dead fanfiction #all of us are dead fic #all of us are dead #yoon gwinam #gwi nam fluff #gwinam #yoon gwi nam #gwi nam x reader

129 notes · View notes

am-i-the-asshole-official · 3 months

Note

AITA for not telling my partners I'm a system?

💚🐻

To preface this, I don't use Tumblr and I'm using my partner's account, so I would rather ask this anonymously. Forgive any non-tumblr-isms 😅.

This happened a while ago, but to be honest I can't let this go. I feel so horrible about it despite being reassured and I figured Tumblr, who has a lot of systems/people with DID/OSDD, would be able to give me an unbiased (as much as I can give an unbiased account, anyway) answer.

I, (24M), am a system with one headmate, P, (??). (Neither of us are sure how old he is, since it seems to change on the day). I don't want to get into exactly how I got him, but I believe the term for what we are is "traumagenic"? Sorry, again, I'm not really familiar with everything.

Anyway, I've had him since I was 8, and he's been... well, a real pain in the ass, to be frank. I understand now that he's a defender by nature and was trying to protect us, but when you get expelled from middle school for several physical attacks and almost get sent to juvie you start to resent the guy a bit. He's a bit like a sleeping bear, except if the sleeping bear had one eye open and killed you before you could hurt him.

Back when I got out of my abuser's house and went no contact at age 20, I moved in with my current partners, Bonfire (24M) and Greenhouse (25NB) (names changed for privacy, obviously.) At the time I didn't know them, but they were looking for another roommate and I desperately needed somewhere to live.

So I moved in with just the clothes on my back and my wallet (bad move, I know, but I didn't have anything anyway). I didn't care to interact with them all that much, not wanting P to get defensive and attack them for no reason, but they just kept pushing and eventually I relented and hung out with them some.

"Some" turned to "often," and then "often" turned into "sleeping-in-their-bed-and-sharing-our-clothes." At that point I was too far into it and embarrassed to admit I'd been hiding a whole other person from them in my mind. I wasn't sure if they'd even like me after, what with P's history of violence.

...so I never told them. I did my best to forget about anything that ever happened and tried to just enjoy the future I'd always wanted for myself. Bonfire and Greenhouse are lovely people and I was finally, maybe just a little happy. I'd never been a happy person and I was content to bask in it for as long as I was able.

This, of course, backfired immensely. P and I didn't have the best relationship at the time, with both of us wanting to do very extreme things to get away from the other. He wanted to kick me out and be by himself in my body, and I wanted to kill myself to be rid of him. We've since reconciled and made strides in accepting ourself for who we are- it hasn't been easy by any means, but that isn't the point.

I recognize now that he was afraid of being hurt again, not wanting to get out of that survival mindset in case Greenhouse and Bonfire turned out to be super-secret mega abusers taking advantage of our trust, but I also know what he did after was wrong.

He got physical with Bonfire, screaming at him and threatening to kill him if he got any closer. I don't have any memory of this happening, so some details may be incorrect, and I apologize for that. Bonfire, not knowing that P was not, in fact, me, (coupled with the fact that he's a fucking idiot (meant with affection)), he got closer and tried to talk me (him) down. P punched him in the face and broke his nose, after which he ran out of the house and left me to "wake up" a few miles away curled up under a tree.

P left me a note a few days later that said he didn't mean to break his (Bonfire's) nose, but that he was lucky he hadn't done worse. This, in P speak, is probably the most sincere apology I could get at the time.

To try and keep this as short as possible, I'll summarize what happened next. I told Bonfire and Greenhouse about P because at that point the cat was basically out of the bag. They said they'd wished I'd told them sooner, and that they were a little uncomfortable being in the same house as "the lean, mean, stabbing machine" (- Bonfire) but that they were willing to help me manage him if I promised to tell them everything I knew about how he worked.

I did, and it's been years since then, and now P and I are, as stated before, closer than ever. I recently asked my partners whether or not they were still upset with me for not telling them, and they just said that they weren't entitled to my medical history and trauma (which, yeah, but he did break Bonfire's nose) and that they didn't care because, "hey, we basically got a free dog out of it" (- Bonfire), and "we made a promise to love you, including all the less-than-savory parts." (- Greenhouse).

Sweet, yes, but I think I might be TA because, um, P LITERALLY BROKE BONFIRE'S NOSE AND THREATENED TO KILL HIM? AND IT MIGHT HAVE BEEN PREVENTED IF I HAD TOLD THEM?

TL;DR: I didn't tell my partners about my headmate that's prone to violence and he did violence on them and I feel bad.

AITA?

(P says hi, by the way, and he also wants me to tell you that he isn't like this anymore and much prefers soft blankets and eating fruit to breaking his family's noses.)

What are these acronyms?

#aita #am i the asshole #suicide cw

111 notes · View notes

pettytiredandjewish · 24 days

Text

Y’all…. Why do you guys keep harassing Jews? Like what is the fucking point? Y’all claim it’s to help Palestine but in reality it’s not. Swarming around synagogues/hospitals/college campus buildings/ restaurants/ etc- chanting genocidal slogans/death threats/ antisemitic and anti Israel slurs isn’t gonna help anyone. All it does is make you an unsafe person to be around. I (and so many others who are just trying to fucking survive) don’t feel safe anymore. I’ve lost so much respect and trust to those who think harassing and wishing death upon Jews and Israelis is okay.

The amount of antisemitic and anti Israel shit that I’ve seen on here and other social media sites… I know that tumblr is literally hell but- holy crap… you guys (and I’m talking to the pro pal/ anti Zionist/ alt right crowds) are so unhinged and so blinded by your Jew hatred. I could keep telling y’all to stop spreading and believing propaganda that hamas and antisemitic groups are spreading/ I could keep telling you that what you are saying is antisemitic/ I could keep telling you that harassing Jews and Israelis isn’t gonna help Palestine…. But you won’t listen and will keep continuing on.

Y’all just hate Jews and are using the war as an excuse to be openly antisemitic. You are making so many people feel unsafe both online and offline- you are okay with harassing and full on assaulting Jews… at this point I don’t think there’s any hope. If this war does end, nothing will go back to how it was before. We will not forget about all the shit that you guys did to us… and I personally will not forgive any of you either.

Sorry if this is long and deep but I’m so fucking done with seeing people think it’s okay to harass and assault Jews and Israelis. I’m so done with the pro pal and anti Zionist crowd sharing and falling for Hamas propaganda and participating in harassing and assaulting Jews (both online and offline). I’m also done with seeing y’all keep thinking this war is a game and even fandom-izing it. Like stop fucking comparing the war to the hunger games or avatar. Just don’t do that. Holy shit I’m so done and tired of all this…

#jumblr #antisemitism #leftist antisemitism #fuck antisemitism #anti zionism = antisemitism #and stop blaming jews for shit that’s not our fault #I could tell you to do better but y’all won’t do that #i/p conflict #stop attacking jews and israelis #you are not helping Palestine by doing that kind of shit

78 notes · View notes

night-market-if · 3 months

Note

Hi! I think about the world you've built so frequently... it's so rich and vibrant. Do you still take RO asks? If not, I'm so sorry and will keep mum from now on!

If so, I'd love to know how the ROs would react to someone hurting the MC in an effort to hurt the RO? Like, making the RO pay by hurting MC?

Hi! I love RO asks. I've just been less on Tumblr the last month or so because its my busy time here with my family. Holidays and birthdays are crazy for us this time of year. :)

I can tell you none of the RO's would react well at all.

Hazel: Oh, our dear, sweet Hazel. One of her enemies was hurting MC to get to her? Beware anyone in the surroundings. Hazel would bring down hell. In fact, the firey pits of hell would arise, the ground would split and rumble beneath her feet, and Hazel personally would rip the spine from the person who hurt MC. She would then promptly take a tonic to forget what she had done.

Gabriel: There would be an "accident" on the way to the prison. No one would ever know what happened to the person but Gabriel would suddenly take an interest in new areas of the market that have construction. And if once that construction project was done, people kept hearing screams come from beneath the concrete? I mean, that's normal. Right?

Belladonna: A public display of disembowelment would be in order. Right in the middle of a plaza. Where she would make an example of whoever dared to even look at the MC wrong.

Malcolm: He would wait. He would follow the person around. Find out their routine. Their family. Then, he would let that person know that he knows exactly where each person they loved is. Where they live. Where they work. What they like to eat. And let the person know, if they do not leave the Night Market now, he will go after each and every one of them.

Milo: He is the most straight forward of them all. He wouldn't try to hide it. The second he saw someone go after the MC, he would pull that knife he keeps hidden in his book, gut the guy, and then open a gateway into the void to shove them in there so they would take their last breath, falling through nothing.

#the night market #interactive fiction #the ro's #they're all a bit murderous #scenerios

97 notes · View notes

justagalwhowrites · 10 months

Note

CAN YOU WRITE A PRE-OUTBREAK ONESHOT WHERE JOEL TAKES CARE OF HER WHEN SHES SICK?? THAT WOULD BE SO CUTEE

Hi Bestie!

I know I said nothing new today but... I ended up with like 2 hours of writing time and decided to finally respond to an ask. I loved this prompt! Thank you SO MUCH - both for sending it in and (hopefully) patiently waiting for me to get to it. I love you!

Sick Leave

On a visit to Texas, you come down with appendicitis and Joel looks after his girl. Can be read independently, but is within the timeline of Lavender, found on Tumblr here.

Pairing: Joel Miller x Female Reader (Lavender reader)

Warnings: None :) Just fluff

Length: 2.1K

Late July, 2002

“And who’s he?” You asked, all but swallowed by the nest of pillows at the head of the bed.

“That’s Sonny,” Sarah said, curled up beside you, her head on your shoulder. “He’s a mobster, he’s like… the dangerous guy in town?”

“He’s kinda cute,” you nodded. Sarah’s nose crinkled. “What? If he grew a mustache he’d kind of look like your dad…”

“Oh, ugh!” She elbowed your ribs lightly, the way she normally would if you hadn’t just had surgery. You winced. “Oh, crap! I’m sorry…”

“It’s ok,” you adjusted a bit, the spark of pain already fading. “I asked for that, calling your dad cute and all.”

“Yeah, you kind of did,” she agreed, adjusting, too, so she was snuggled in around your arm. “Plus if you think he’s cute, you should see his body guard, Jason. He’s… ugh, he’s just so good. Oh, look, see? There he is.”

You giggled a little.

“He is cute,” you conceded. “Think I like Sonny more, though…”

“Ugh, you would,” she scoffed.

Sarah watched the melodrama intently and you just rested your head against hers, enjoying the chance to snuggle a bit with your favorite kid. It had been an unusual visit to Texas this time around. Instead of trying to cram as much fun stuff into the few weeks you were down as you possibly could, you’d come down with appendicitis just after you got into town. That had meant no trips to Six Flags, no midweek beach trips, not even any matinees to watch movies in the comfort of overpowered air conditioning.

But it had also meant Sarah giving you a thorough education on her latest summer obsession - a soap opera called General Hospital - and Joel, waiting on you hand and foot.

“Baby Girl?” You heard the front door close as Joel came in. “You forgetting that conversation we had about boundaries again?”

“No!” Sarah called, rolling her eyes.

Joel came into the bedroom, a drink carrier with three Diary Queen cups in hand. He shook his head.

“Sure looks like ya are,” he said, setting the ice cream on the dresser. “Thought we decided to give her some space? Make sure you’re not jostling that incision and giving her time to rest?”

“But Dad!” She groaned. “I never get to do this…”

“She’s right, you know,” you said as Joel passed you your Oreo Blizzard. “I’m usually too far away for good soap opera girl time and we’re usually a little too busy when I’m in town to keep up with all the goings on in… where is this again?”

“Port Charles,” Sarah said. Joel handed her a milkshake with a roll of his eyes.

“Port Charles,” you said, smiling up at Joel. “So this, really, is vital stuff. Plus, I’ve learned that Jason is, apparently, cute.”

“Cute, huh?” He asked, getting his own ice cream from the carrier and delicately climbing in on the other side of you.

“Oh yeah,” Sarah said. “I mean, have you seen him? Those arms!”

“I do know a thing or two about liking men with nice arms,” you said, giving Joel a teasing look. He shook his head, grinning slightly.

“Aren’t you a little young to be lookin’ at men’s arms?” Joel asked, leaning over you a little to look at his daughter.

“Dad, I’m 13,” she rolled her eyes.

“You’ve been 13 for a week,” he muttered.

“13 is 13, love,” you took a bite of your Blizzard. “Better get used to it.”

When Sarah got up to run to the bathroom during the commercial, Joel adjusted your pillows and tucked you against his side.

“Seriously,” he said, his voice low. “You need to be resting, I can take her out of the house…”

“Hon, I’ve been in bed for three days,” you smiled at him. “I am resting.”

“Just worried about you,” he kissed your temple. “Scared the hell outta me…”

He’d been like this since you’d gotten sick in the first place.

The first few days of your trip had been fine. There was the ceremonial visit to your favorite Mexican place in town - always the first stop you made besides dropping bags off at Joel’s house.

Sarah was old enough now that she could stay home on her own in the evenings, so you and Joel went with Tommy and a girl he was seeing - you hadn’t bothered to learn her name, you could already tell she wasn’t going to stick - to listen to music the night your flight got in. The next day you spent in the pool, watching Joel grill from the inflatable lounge chair he’d gotten just for you, margarita in hand.

“You’re lookin’ mighty comfortable there, Baby,” he teased.

You shrugged and sipped your drink.

“Might just have to move in,” you said. “Poolside cocktail service is a really nice perk…”

You woke up the next day feeling like shit.

It was like a switch had flipped. You went to bed feeling fine - slightly tipsy, but fine. More than fine after Joel got done with you. And then, right around six in the morning, you were running to the bathroom to puke.

“Shit, baby,” Joel was sitting on the bathtub next to you, one hand on your back, rubbing in broad circles between your shoulder blades, the other holding your hair in his fist. “Maybe I didn’t cook the chicken all the way through…”

“When have you ever fucked up on the grill?” You asked, resting your cheek on your arm as it draped against the toilet seat. Joel’s eyes went a little wide.

“You don’t think you’re…” he broke off. You raised your eyebrows and tried not to laugh.

“Don’t think morning sickness, shows up two days after you sleep with someone,” you said. “And it’s been a few months since I was here over spring break, I think it would have started sooner than now if I were knocked up.”

“Right,” he nodded, looking relieved. “Right…”

“I just picked up a stomach bug at the airport,” you sighed. “Make sure you and Sarah wash your hands a TON, they’re nasty little fuckers…”

You totally lost your appetite and a fever showed up that afternoon. Joel refused to keep his distance, sending Sarah to stay with Lizzy while he brought you a steady stream of Jell-o, chicken broth and popsicles.

“You’re going to get yourself sick,” you said the second night you felt like crap. You were lying on your side, Joel wrapped around you, his broad shoulders enveloping you, his hand splayed over your stomach.

“Don’t care,” he kissed the crown of your head. “Need you at least this close. You’re too fuckin’ far away all the time, not going to let a little stomach flu keep me from touchin’ you while I can.”

You weren’t noble enough to fight him on it. You had nasty stomach cramps all day on top of everything else. Being held by Joel was about the only thing that made you feel better.

It was about four in the morning when the feeling in your stomach went from cramps to sharp, stabbing pain. It jerked you out of a sound sleep, your hand flying behind you to Joel’s hip, your nails digging into him as you fought to breathe through the agony of it.

“Baby?” Joel’s voice was thick with sleep. “What’s goin’ on, you OK? Need somethin’?”

“I think I need to go to the hospital,” you managed through gritted teeth. “I don’t think this is a stomach bug, I think it’s appendicitis…”

Joel was wide awake then, rushing to put on a shirt and helping you sit up in bed. You winced as you moved, gritting your teeth, the pain sharp.

“Hold on, Baby,” Joel tucked an arm below your knees and the other around your ribs, tugging you to his side. “I’ve got you…”

He lifted you off the bed and carried you down the stairs as gently as he could, cradling your feverish body to his chest. He lowered you gingerly into the passenger seat of his truck and buckled you in before he drove to the hospital, going at least 10 over the speed limit the whole way.

Joel paced the whole time you sat in the ER, going up to talk to someone at the nurses’ station every five minutes until they got you back to be evaluated.

“Oh,” the doctor said as she looked at your stomach on an ultrasound. “We need to get you back now. Right now. This looks like it’s about to rupture.”

“Shit,” Joel paced, like a caged animal. The second the doctor left to go arrange emergency surgery, he took your hand, holding it tight.

“Baby,” you said, voice calm. “It’s an easy surgery, it hardly even counts as surgery, you don’t need to be worried…”

“They were ready to leave you in the damn waiting room all day,” he frowned. “Then what would have happened?”

“The surgeon would have had a harder job,” you said. “Joel, hon, it’s fine.”

He was like that until they took you back for surgery, glaring at doctors and nurses as they whisked you away.

When you woke up a few hours later, he was there, bouquet of daisies in his hands and a relieved smile on his face.

“Do me a favor and try real hard to not scare me like that again,” he said, brushing your hair back from your face.

“I’ll try my best,” you smiled a little.

But ever since, he’d stuck close by.

“You know,” you said, looking up at him, poking at your Blizzard with the long, red spoon. “I was thinking…”

“Always dangerous when it comes to you,” he said. You glared at him.

“Anyway,” you said. “I was thinking… I should probably start doing a bit more. It’s been a few days, I’m feeling pretty good…”

“Baby,” he sighed.

“Come on,” you pouted a little. “I’m getting restless.”

He sighed again.

“What were you thinkin’?”

You smiled.

“Nothing crazy,” you said. “Just… could we do BBQ for dinner? Maybe try to go see a movie tomorrow? We haven’t made it to Men in Black II yet and Sarah really liked the first one…”

“How about we start with the BBQ and see how you’re doin’ in the morning,” he kissed your temple. “Not gonna let you push it…”

Joel made sure you had plenty of water and a book before he and Sarah went to pick up dinner, giving you a lingering kiss on your forehead as he left.

They came home with enough BBQ to feed a small army and made you a plate with brisket and Mac and cheese, your favorites. But they also picked up Men in Black from Blockbuster, along with an ample supply of Mike and Ikes, popcorn and Sno-Caps. While you were getting cleaned up in the bathroom, Joel and Sarah set up the bed with three tray tables and a nest of pillows big enough for all of you to recline and watch the movie. He even lit a candle - lavender scented - on the nightstand.

“Joel!” You gaped at him. “What’s all this?”

“Figured we can do it up right,” he said, tucking you into bed and setting the tray table over your legs.

The three of you had dinner and cuddled close in bed, laughing at Will Smith getting thrown around by aliens. Sarah fell asleep, her head against your shoulder. Joel put on When Harry Met Sally once the first movie ended.

“I’m sorry this trip has been such a bust,” you said softly as he ran one hand gently up and down your arm.

He frowned.

“What are you talkin’ about?” He asked. “Hasn’t been a bust. You know how grateful I am this happened when you were here and not all the way in New York? How glad I am that I got to be the one to take care of you? I’d have been fuckin’ terrified, you all the way up there with just your grandmother to look after you, somethin’ like this happens. Besides, I’ve gotten to spend a week laying around in bed with my girls, not arguin’ with that.”

You smiled a little.

“Still,” you said. “Think we should try for the movie tomorrow. Not sure Sarah’s soaps are quite my speed.”

“If you’re up for it,” he kissed your temple. “But if you need another day or two of rest, don’t fight it. Just let me look after my girl, OK?”

You closed your eyes, content.

“OK.”

A/N: I hope you all enjoyed this little drabble of Joel being all soft and caring! It was really fun to write him being all fluffy and worried.

For those wanting some insight into who they're talking about at the beginning, I give you Sonny Corinthos from General Hospital:

And Jason Morgan from General Hospital:

You know. For science.

I'm going to go ahead and tag the usual Lavender crowd here. I hope that's OK!!! I'm sorry if it's not and I hope it's not too annoying!

Taglist: @paleidiot@ayamenimthiriel@ginger-swag-rapunzel@drewharrisonwriter@flugazi @pedropascalsbbg@taoyuji@starstruckmusiciansartghost@splendsay@bigboiseason123@jpbplvr @ashleyandring @mrsyixingunicorn10@sloanexx@ninaminaromina @lady-bellyn @hufflepuffriver @sarap-77 @storyarcscribe @mellymbee @jasminedragoon @lemonmeli @reds-ramblings@arizonadaydreamer@mumma-moonchild@blackroseguzzi@candypeaches16@kittenlittle24@wrappedinfiction@oatmeaiboy@pedritosdarling@winchestergypsy90@imnotdatboii @lalalalemonade11 @maknimuk1@mrsdarcyinlovewithbuckybarnes@pedrosaidsheispunk@commanderawkward@n7cje@elliesgirlll@tsunamistorm123@spookyxsam@leeeesahhh @anoverwhelmingdin @untamedheart81 @pedropascalfan221 @pedr0swh0r3 @pedrobae@fifia-writes@fatima-marisa @acf2023 @1soff@encephalitiskat

Thank you so much for reading and being here! Love you all!

#fanfic #joel miller x female reader #joel miller x reader #joel miller x you #joel miller fluff

267 notes · View notes

humblequestvinyl · 4 months

Text

growing sideways

GROWING SIDEWAYS, FISHER BROTHERS X SISTER!READER

APART OF THE ‘WE’LL ALL BE HERE FOREVER’ SERIES

SUMMARY: when the unexpected happens and laurel shows up at the summer house, y/n fisher is confronted with more than just trying to keep the summer house from being sold.

inspired by growing sideways by noah kahan

◀ ⏸ ▶

lowercase is intentional! wc: 1.8k

warnings: mention of underage drinking, deep grief, mentions of not eating, swearing, depression, throwing up & broken promises (literally just sibling banter but you know!)

a/n: guys i got accepted into college who cheered. anyway i have been grinding on school work i promise i didn’t forget about this series & my tumblr account! i also didn't proof read this sorry

WAKING UP IN THE MORNING WITH A MASSIVE HANGOVER WAS SOMETHING Y/N WAS QUICKLY BECOMING ACCUSTOMED TO,

and she wasn’t sure if she liked it or not.

except this morning, she woke up to a quiet knock on her door, and the h/c laid still hoping whoever it was would just go away. however, she knew she was screwed as soon as the door opened, and her bed dipped.

“n/n you’ve gotta get up.”conrad told the girl, seeing her breathing still for a moment before trying to go back to normal, “i’m serious y/n, laurel’s here and she wants to talk to you.”

it was silent for a few moments before y/n made slight movement, curling up into a ball, not really wanting to leave her spot for the day unless she had to, “why is laurel here?”

“apparently you were so drunk that you called her and left her a voicemail sobbing about how dad was selling the house, how you fought with emerson and how i was going to miss my exams.”conrad explained, and everything from the night before had hit y/n all at once.

the fight with emerson, the call to laurel, the endless amount of alcohol she had, and the fact that they were about to lose the house she called her first home.

“i’m gonna be sick.”y/n muttered before rushing towards the bathroom where her eldest brother held her hair back, with a frown spread across his face knowing everything was about to get a lot worse.

one she was finished, jeremiah walked in with a bottle of water for the girl. she took slow sips, quietly thanking her brother for the bottle before jere leaned up against the door frame of the bathroom, watching his little sister with slight worry.

“is dad down there too?”y/n questioned, and the two shook their heads, “good, i don’t have the energy to fight with him today.”

“he left about an hour ago.”jere told her, and she hummed, leaning her head up against the wall, wanting nothing more than to go back to sleep.

“c’mon, if you go talk to laurel, you, jere, belly, steven and i will go to denny’s after to get breakfast.”conrad told the girl hoping it would at least get her willingly downstairs, “it’ll help with the hangover.”

“you promise?”y/n questioned, staring up at conrad with slight hope he’d actually take her.

“have i ever broken a promise with you before?”conrad questioned with a slight chuckle as he helped his sister up, and the fisher brothers walked the girl downstairs, making sure she wasn’t going to fall.

“when i was eleven you pinky promised you’d get me cotton candy on the boardwalk but that never happened.”y/n told him with a slight frown as they finally made it to the bottom of the stairs, and into the kitchen where they sat laurel cleaning up the breakfast that she had made for their father.

“i’ll get you some the next time we’re there.”he told her, guiding her towards one of the barstools, and the two brothers gave laurel a smile, “she’s all yours.”

y/n watched as her brothers walked outside before her eyes drifted back to laurel who had a soft smile spread across her face, placing a glass of orange juice in front of her. she watched as laurel sat across from her, and she studied the woman who she considered like a second mother to her. the bags under her eyes were darker, and stress radiated off the woman but she still looked calm as ever.

“how are you doing?”laurel asked the girl, breaking the silence between the two as y/n gently sipped on the orange juice, glancing up at laurel, “is that a rhetorical question?”

“no, it’s a serious one.”

“well, i’m sitting here at the beach house trying to cope with the fact that we’re losing said beach house and my mom is dead.”y/n stated plainly, before plastering a sarcastic smile across her face, “how are you doing laurel?”

“well for starters i’m worried about you.”laurel told the girl in front of her as she continued to sip on the juice, “you scared the shit out of me with that phone call.”

“i’m sorry.”y/n mumbled as she finished the juice, and placed the glass into the sink, “i won’t call when i’m drunk.”

“it’s not even that kiddo,”laurel turned towards the h/c girl, trying her best to keep the situation calm, “connie texted me a few weeks ago saying they couldn’t find you for a bit, and then to get the voicemail you left last night, i’m worried about you.”

“well you shouldn’t be because i’m fine.”y/n stated as her lips pressed into a thin line, leaning up against the counted to look at laurel to try and convince her that everything was fine, “i’m breathing, i’m eating-”

“but you’re not.”laurel cut her off, catching y/n by surprise, “conrad and jeremiah don’t remember the last time you willingly ate without them having to force you to have something, and they’re telling me you’re not sleeping unless you’re drunk.”

“this isn’t healthy y/n.”she told the girl who looked at her in shock, not knowing that laurel had known, “you and i both know it.”

“but it works.”y/n whispered, knowing laurel was right. it wasn’t healthy but it was the only aspect in her life she had control over right now, and if she had her way, it was going to stay exactly like that.

“it doesn’t work y/n! if you seriously don’t stop drinking soon and eating more you’re going to end up in the hospital!”laurel exclaimed, and y/n watched her as she stood up and walked towards the girl, “i’m serious y/n this has got to stop.”

“this is the only thing i have control over right now.”the h/c girl admitted as tears brimmed her eyes, “the only fucking thing i have control over right now.”

“and it’s under control.”she lied, trying to keep her tears at bay knowing as soon as they slipped out, she’d completely break, “if you guys want me to start eating more then fine, i’ll start eating more.”

“but for fucks sake laurel, let me have this one thing.”y/n begged and laurel shook her head and she wrapped the girl in a tight hug, and she completely broke.

“i can’t kiddo and you know that.”laurel told the girl softly, her heart breaking for the girl she watched grown up come crashing down right in front of her, “you can do this n/n, you’ve got connie, jere, your dad-”

“but i don’t!”y/n spoke in between sobs, clutching onto the woman like she was the only person she had left, “dad hates me, connies at college, i can barely even talk with jere anymore since mom died and i pushed emmy so far away i doubt she’ll want to talk to me.”

“i’ve got nobody laurel.”

laurel pulled back from the hug, cupping the h/c girl cheeks, wiping away some of the stray tears that fell as y/n tried to hold off her sobs as long as she could.

“you’ve got me.”laurel told the girl, and y/n started to shake her head before laurel stopped her, “i know i’ve been absent since your mom died and i’m sorry for that. but i promise you y/n you’re never losing me.”

“and if that means you need me to come stay for the weekend or call me at midnight about something then do it.”the woman explained, and y/n nodded slowly, “but seriously y/n, you’ve gotta stop doing what you’re doing because it’s not healthy.”

“promise me you’ll at least try to stop.”laurel begged, and y/n nodded as her lip wobbled, threatening to unload more tears, “i promise.”

“and if you need anything i need you to call me.”she reminded the young girl, knowing there had been so many instances within the last two months that the girl didn’t call when she should’ve, but she also knew that laurel was graveling with her grief as well.

it was a few moments before either of them spoke up, having no words to be said before a thought popped into the h/c girl’s head, “what are we going to do about the house?”

laurel gave the girl a soft smile, one that instantly gave the fisher girl comfort, “you’re going to do absolutely nothing. it is all taken care of.”

“connie and jere will talk to you about it when you all go out to breakfast.”the woman told the girl just as they saw belly stick her head into the doorway with a slight smile on her face.

“you guys okay?”the girl asked, and y/n nodded, wiping away the remaining tears that streamed down her face, “if you’re all set we’re about to head out for breakfast.”

“go.”laurel told y/n, before the girl walked towards belly, and belly had the widest smile she had seen in awhile.

“almost ready to grab some breakfast?”belly questioned, and y/n nodded before the two walked out to conrad's car, leaving the girl replaying the entire conversation in her head.

the five split up into two cars, with belly going with jeremiah and steven, while y/n and conrad had gone in another.

as they drove off, taylor swift played softly in the background as y/n had her back turned to conrad, not really wanting to talk about anything in that moment after the emotional turmoil she had just went through.

when they finally arrived at dennys, they were the first ones there, and conrad shut the car off before turning to where y/n had been curled up.

“dad’s not selling the cousin’s house.”conrad finally spoke up, causing the girl’s head to whip around to look at her brother, “we’re keeping the house.”

“how?”y/n questioned as shock filled the girl, and she could see the smile spreading across his face, “laurel’s a miracle worker.”

“dad is going to sell the house in boston and you guys are going to move into the cousins house.”he explained, and conrad could finally see some sparkle come back into his sisters eyes.

“we’re staying in cousins.”

#conrad fisher x reader #conrad fisher #conrad fisher angst #jeremiah fisher x reader #susannah fisher #the summer i turned pretty #the summer i turned pretty angst #belly conklin x reader #belly conklin #we'll all be here forever series #jeremiah fisher angst #jeremiah fisher imagine #conrad fisher imagine #tsitp conrad #conrad fisher x sister!reader #jeremiah fisher x sister!reader

114 notes · View notes