#sorry I needed to get out my little hater moments before getting on the plane were driving to the airport rn dhdmhdjd
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Nothing makes me judge ppl harsher than sekai song ranking videos. Get some taste I'm begging y'all /lh
#rat rambles#sekai posting#this is directed at 25ji cover fans they have like 1 good good group cover and its not fucking lower their lower cover fucking sucks#for the record its bug bug is soooooo fucking good#ok ok 25ji have some ok covers but most of which arent particularly noteworthy imo#except for the good kanade covers high key some of the best covers in the game#the solo versions I mean#also Im so sorry but I just dont get the appeal of all but one or two l/n originals like I just dont get the appeal#also I wanna see more appreciatiom for newly edgy idols but thats just me#also no more pretending kohane beat eater solo is better than the group version pls she sounds so lonely#sorry I needed to get out my little hater moments before getting on the plane were driving to the airport rn dhdmhdjd
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a dissection of King of the Hill Season 4, Episode 1 - Peggy Hill: The Decline and Fall and why it made me feel insane
this episode was so insanely dark & miserable i need to pick it apart and just talk about it or i will never be normal again!
i will now post most of the script with my thoughts added in. some parts were deleted for "brevity" (this is still a longass post i'm sorry)
[Grave instrumental music]
Peggy?
[Hank exclaiming]
l think my wife.... l think, might be dead.
l'll be right back.
[Luanne screams]
the man thinks his wife is dead which is kinda sad but Luanne is so funny in this ep lol
[Dramatic instrumental music]
[Hank grunting]
HANK: Peggy!
BOBBY: Dangit. Didi. Push!
MEDICAL STAFF: lt's okay, son. The baby's here.
-He's beautiful.
-What's his name?
MEDICAL STAFF: Here you go Daddy. To cut the umbilical cord.
kinda messed up that they think Bobby is the dad......hes like 12......... but ok
BOBBY: [Softly] Oh. My uncle.
Hank: Peggy?
[Peggy gasping]
[Gasps]
LUANNE: Aunt Peggy?
[Sobbing]
No!
[Gasps]
luanne haters suck my dick she's so silly i love her
[Somber instrumental music]
Hank: Okay (seeing Peggy from afar, on the ground). Think one piece. Peggy?
Peggy: [Weakly] Hey, hey, hey.
Hank: God! You're all smashed up.
Peggy: -l'm alive.
Luanne: Uncle Hank, we're too late.
TV ANNOUNCER: Aikman takes the snap,
a quick pass over the middle to Smith,,,the 20, the 10, Emmitt Smith scores!
HANK: Yes!
DOCTOR: Hank Hill?
HANK: l wasn't watching.
Just for a second.
l have no idea what the score is. l couldn't tell you.
wait why did he lose interest in his wife's condition..................actually nvm we all deserve a lil stress free moment when experiencing tragedies right?
DR: Your wife is gonna be just fine.
Hank: Yes!
DR: Peggy has a compression fracture of the bones in her back.
Thank goodness for the mud.
She would not have survived if she had fallen on concrete...
or a fence.
HANK: But she's okay?
DR: Yes. They're putting her into a body cast to immobilize her while she heals.
HANK: What color is the cast?
DR: What does that matter, Mr. Hill?
HANK: l don't know.
l've never been through this before.
l'm just trying to ask the right questions.
DR: lt's white. Sponge bath. Bedpan.
HANK: -Thank you.
that was a good scene i liked that
[Peggy humming]
-Peggy?
-Hank. Come on in.
Look at me. l'm in an ensemble.
My top cast and my bottom cast match.
[Both chuckle]
Yeah. Quality plaster.
[Luanne comes in, immediately leaves sobbing hysterically]
the voice acting is just so good in these
PEGGY: l'm guessing that was Luanne.
l wish she wouldn't feel sorry for me when l feel so terrific for me.
l have had a near-death experience. Most people never get that,,,
except when it's next to their death experience. Then they can't appreciate it.
You know what's odd? The last thing l remember was deciding not to jump. What or who would have made me change my mind?
HANK: (Lying) l'm not sure. l don't know. l wasn't in the plane. l was on the ground, remember? l'm the one who found you.
gaslight girlboss gatekeep
-Mom?
-Bobby?
-You really fell out of a plane?
-Yes, sir. l did.
HANK: Your mom is one of only 16 people who have survived parachutes not opening.
PEGGY: Now, 16 is my estimate. l'll double-check my numbers later.
[Luanne walks in]
LUANNE: l'm sorry about before.
l don't know what came over me.
[Starts sobbing]
Oh, God!
[Luanne runs out]
another great luanne moment. W for luanne fans.
[Cotton comes in]
COTTON: What did you do to your wife?
l didn't teach you that.
cotton sucks i hate cotton. even when he's speaking up against spousal abuse.
[Door creaking open]
Where's my new dependent? l'm supposed to look at it.
cotton yikes #1
DIDI: Where did l put.... There it is.
BOBBY: Uncle, l present you to your father.
COTTON: Look at him. His shins are perfect. [Cooing] Look at you.
You're a handsome little soldier. You wanna kill a Nazi? A Nazi, Nazi-scrazzi.
weird way to talk to a baby. cotton yikes #2
[Cooing]
COTTON: Didi, did you name this baby yet?
DlDl: What's the use?
she literally looks so sad... this is where it starts bumming me out a lil
COTTON: l'm calling him Hank. l always wanted a boy named Hank.
HANK: Dad, Hank is my name.
COTTON: Not anymore. l'm taking it back.
He's Hank.
HANK: You can't take away a grown man's name.
COTTON: All right. l'll call him G.H. Good Hank.
this was unhinged too but way funnier than the other stuff
COTTON: Did you see the way my boy looked at that nurse?
Practically slapped her rump then and there.
nvm i'm back to hating cotton. cotton yikes #3
[Thunder cracking]
[Ominous instrumental music. Hank is having a nightmare.]
BAD HANK: Peggy, you've gotta do it. lt's amazing. lt's the best dang feeling in the world.
evil hank >:)
NURSE: There we go. Okay. Now you try.
COTTON: We'll see about all this.
Okay. (Putting a diaper on the baby) Put this little nipper in here,
tuck this little nipper in there.
Close up shop. There. Ready for soiling.
What the.... The kid is leaking out of his chest!
NURSE: That's from his nipples. lt's a form of lactation.
COTTON: Dangit. You said it was a boy.
NURSE: He is. He's simply been ingesting a lot
of female hormones from his mother. lt's so common it has a name.
Witch's milk.
COTTON: Lord! What did l do? Was it the 50 men l killed?
bro is abandoning his literal newborn bc he's anti-science. cotton yikes #4
PEGGY: The maternity ward ceiling. lt reminds me of when my son was born.
PEGGY: And l am also reminded of when my next child will be born. Why isn't the baby with his mother?
NURSE: Didi Hill has postpartum depression. She couldn't even gather up the strength to put on some lipstick.
And she looks awful.
UM??????? it's giving HIPAA violation. also she has POSRPARTUM DEPRESSION. that was simply..not nice
COTTON: You did this to my son.
There's no milk coming out of these (groping his bare chest, shirtless)
cotton verbally abusing his depressed wife. this guy is the WORST. yikes #5
PEGGY: Cotton, stop it. You should be comforting her.
COTTON: Comfort her? Comfort me.
😒
NURSE: Mr. Hill, your insurance company's automated voice says you have to leave the hospital today, in 85 minutes.
COTTON: But l can't take care of a dripping witch-child. Can't we just stay hospitaling until Didi gets her brains back?
NURSE: [Laughing] Maybe if you were the richest man in America.
lots to unpack here. america's failure of a medical system. cotton being a dick about his lactating newborn, unsympathetic abt didi's condition - but at least advocating for a longer hospital stay isn't a bad idea...................BUT THEN WHY DID THE NURSE LAUGH AT HIM LOL she doesn't care abt people
DR: You and your wife and those flowers are going home today.
HANK: Yeah. But Peggy's got a broken back.
DR: l know. l told you that. But she wants to be discharged.
l'm not so worried about her back.
l'm worried about her emotional state.
HANK: Yeah. But she seems so happy.
DR: Once the thrill of surviving wears off...and it does, trust me, Jetski, July '94...she may experience a second crash when she feels her own limitations.
HANK: There won't be any second crash. As long as l'm around,
l won't let her feel any limitations.
DR: There's no need for you to feel this guilty. You didn't make her jump.
HANK: Yeah. Do you think you could put that on her chart?
sus hank with 0 emotional intelligence. unsurprising tho.
HANK: Peggy, l'm here.
PEGGY: Hey! We're going home today.
l have packed myself up without any help from the nurses,
this was sad to me idk she's so delusional
[Hank sighs]
HANK: Are you sure you're ready?
PEGGY: Honey, ready or not, l have got to go.
l invited Cotton and Didi and the baby to stay with me...until they can take care of him on their own.
HANK: You think you can help them take care of a baby?
PEGGY: lf that poor farm boy, whose arms were ripped off by a thresher...could dial 91 1 with his nose...then l think Peggy Hill
can take care of that baby.
like, you obvs can tell she's gonna break soon. kind of a bummer.
HANK: (Unloading Peggy from the ambulance into the neighborhood) Back off. Back off, everybody.
Everybody.
(They bump Peggy into the doorframe when wheeling her inside the house)
HANK: That's our fault, Peggy, not your fault.
PEGGY: Try the back door. lt'll fit.
[Balloon pops. They keep bumping Peggy into the sliding door walls.)]
PEGGY: Am l in a very wide bed?
HANK: Maybe we can get her in at an angle.
Come on, guys. All right. On three.
BOOMHAUER: lf you lift on three, you mean
one, two, dang ol' three and then go...or do you kind of, like, lift her on three?
HANK: Just lift now, okay?
HANK: Now.
HANK: Tilt towards me. No. Toward....
HANK: Fine. Away from me.
peggy looks really uncomfortable in this scene 🥲
[All grunting]
BlLL: Hi, Peggy.
PEGGY: Hello, Bill.
DALE: l think a ''thank you'' would be in order.
HANK: Dale, get the hell out of here.
this was so unhinged i love dale
(Minh, Nancy, & Peggy inside the house)
MINH: Cast make you look good for Peggy Hill. Like you mummy, museum piece, but with attitude. Mummy for the '90s.
NANCY: Sug', you ain't helping.
(to Peggy) People spend hundreds of dollars at a spa to get wrapped up like that.
PEGGY: Yes. lt's very refreshing.
NANCY: l just can't believe your attitude.
Who would have thought?
Didi's depressed and you're not.
LIKE..........the neighbor's don't have any sympathy for didi either??? THEYRE SO MEAN??
[Car horn honking]
The baby's here. [NANCY & MINGH leave)
PEGGY: Good. The baby's here. Okay. Minh, make sure Didi puts a hat on him. Nancy, you make sure he takes it off
when he gets inside the house.
peggy's just talking to herself until she realizes her friends have LEFT and its????? SO QUIET??? LIKE, THIS IS SO SAD WTF
[Scene with Peggy and Hank]
PEGGY: l feel so stupid for jumping. lt wasn't worth this. Why did l do it? Do you remember? This is really bugging me. [...] Wait, wait, wait. l just remembered something. On the plane, l was talking to you on a phone, Do planes have phones?
HANK: That's a good one. l'll look into that.
PEGGY: No. l remember now. l was talking to you. But what did we say?
HANK: lt sounds familiar. But with all the noise from the engines...and then you falling and all, l'm not sure we'll ever know.
PEGGY: Please, Hank. You are gonna have to be my memory...because l don't have one anymore.
HANK: Deal.
like i get that hank is feeling guilty and it's like hahaha funny but...................................gaslighter 😒
OK THIS NEXT SCENE IS LIKE. THE WORST ONE. LIKE, ITS SO LEGITIMATELY AWFUL FOR HUMANITY
HANK: You don't have to yell. We can hear
you just fine through the baby monitor.
PEGGY: Why am l being fed with a bottle?
HANK: We're out of straws.
PEGGY: l do not want to be fed with a bottle.
HANK: lt's just easier, okay? Please?
and then he like...PUTS THE BOTTLE IN HER MOUTH. like i'm SORRY to be a joykill but that's literally so dehumanizing & wrong?? THE WOMAN WAS IN A HORRIBLE ACCIDENT you could at least treat her like a person & LISTEN TO HER. she is uncomfortable & in pain!!!!!!!
PEGGY: (drinking the bottle) What is that?
HANK: lt should be Carnation lnstant Breakfast.
PEGGY: lt tastes like formula.
HANK: (at Bobby, chuckling) You took Peggy's bottle,
and l took the baby's bottle? Now, that's funny.
also bobby is the one taking care of the baby and he is EXHAUSTED. literally child neglect for both kids idk what to tell you...
PEGGY: (being wiped with a baby wipe) What are you doing?
Look, l do not want a bottle, okay?
HANK: Shhh.
PEGGY: l'm not hungry.
HANK: Shhh.
PEGGY: l want eggs.
HANK: Shhh.
[Peggy crying]
[Peggy and baby crying]
at this point they have stopped listening to peggy entirely. so much that she breaks down crying!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! the woman is deadass psychologically broken or something!!!!!! i found this uncomfortable to watch
BOBBY: Maybe Mom just needs to burp.
HANK: Bobby, could you give us a moment?
(to Peggy) What's wrong?
"WHAT'S WRONG"??????? I WONDER???????????????????? BITCH HAS NO EMOTIONAL INTELLIGENCE
PEGGY: [Sobbing] My life is ruined. l had to jump out of a plane
for our anniversary. l'm sorry, Hank. l ruined both of our lives.
[Peggy sobbing hysterically]
HANK: Okay. Look. lt wasn't your fault. lt was my fault.
hank confesses to his evil sins of hyping up sky diving. peggy says the real reason she jumped is bc she's jealous of didi & cotton for having a baby.
PEGGY: Do you know what torture that is? l was once one of the finest mothers in the state of Texas... and now l can't even wipe a baby. And l have to watch those two, Cotton and Stupid...with their beautiful new baby that they don't even want.
[Sobbing]
DIDI HAS POSTPARTUM DEPRESSION, A LEGITIMATE MEDICAL CONDITION THAT CAN ACTUALLY BE FATAL TO BOTH NEW MOTHERS AND THEIR BABIES!!!!!!!!!! AND COTTON IS LITERALLY VERBALLY ABUSIVE!!!!!!! EVERYONE IS BEING SO MEAN ABOUT IT LIKE IF SHE CHOSE THIS!!!!! IM GOING INSANE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
PEGGY: What are you smiling about?
HANK: lt wasn't my fault. lt's just such a load off my mind.
l feel lighter than air.
l mean, l feel bad in a new way, for you...because what you were just saying. That stuff.
IM GONNA KILL THIS BITCH HANK WHAT THE FUCK IS WRONG WITH UUUUUUUUUUUUU
PEGGY: Just leave me alone, okay?
HANK: You just want me to leave?
PEGGY: Yes.
HANK: So the right thing for me to do is leave,
even though you're crying.
PEGGY: Go.
HANK: l'm skeptical, but okay.
at this point i start wondering if hank is neurodivergent & a minor. jk jk this part was funny
[Bobby signing to the baby, exhausted]
COTTON: Bobby, since you're doing all the woman's work around here...be a woman and get me my shin jelly.
BOBBY: G.H. kind of needs me right now.
COTTON: So, take him along.Just get the jelly and lather me up.
child abuse, neglect, sexism, etc etc but the biggest crime is making me look at cotton again. LESS COTTON, MORE LUANNE!
DIDI: Bobby, Could you buy me some lottery tickets?
BOBBY: [Screaming] l am a 12-year-old boy. l am this child's nephew. l cannot do this. l cannot do this! [Gives Didi the baby] lf anybody makes any dinner, l'll eat. But that's it. All l'll do is eat!
not gonna say bobby was in the wrong for screaming at didi, since he is just a child & should NOT have been doing any of these things, but DAMN DID THEY REALLY HAVE TO PUT DOWN DIDI EVEN MORE????!?!??
[Baby crying]
DIDI: Baby, stop crying. l.... Oh....l'm tired. [She walks over to Peggy, put the baby on her bed, and leaves]
PEGGY: Didi, are you leaving? No, please. Someone has to watch the baby. Because unless it's flying above my head, l cannot do it,
All right, Help! Will somebody come,,,, Hank!
What? What's wrong?
HANK: l shouldn't have left, right? l had a feeling....
PEGGY: The baby.
HANK: Yeah?
PEGGY: lt's crying.
HANK: lt's always crying. The baby hasn't stopped crying since it got here.
PEGGY: Just do something!
hank's emotional intelligence is so low that he literally didn't even think there was anything abnormal about a baby that cries 24/7. GUYS, IF UR BABY IS CRYING ALL THE TIME, IT COULD BE IN PAIN OR DYING OR SOMETHING. DON'T BE LIKE HANK.
HANK: [Goes to Cotton] All right. l've had enough, Dad. There's a baby crying in the house.
COTTON: Go fix it.
HANK: You go fix it.
COTTON: l ain't getting near that child. He's possessed.
HANK: He's just leaking a little milk. Sure, it's disturbing, but he'll grow out of it.
COTTON: How do you know? Are you a leaker? Are you leaking on me right now, Leaky?
cotton literally does not want this child. child neglect, abandonment. JAIL JAIL JAIL. wait i forgot the cotton yikes counter. what number were we on???????
HANK: You hear that, that silence?
COTTON: G.H.
HANK: Something's wrong.
[Dramatic instrumental music. They run back to the room with Peggy and GH]
[Both gasp]
[Baby cooing. Peggy is rocking GH with her toe]
[Gentle instrumental music]
PEGGY: Isn't it amazing? It's the greatest dang feeling in the world.
[Theme music]
everything is ok now because peggy has proven that she is able to serve, hence she has worth again!! the neglect isn't relevant anymore!!! who cares that she was gaslit & manipulated & treated like garbage throughout the whole episode!!!! no one had any genuine care about her health after an almost fatal accident but that's fine!!!!! FUCK DIDI SHE HAS DEPRESSION!!!!
anyway that was a Not Very Nice episode in terms of human decency. the script alone doesn't really capture how heavy it felt; there was lots of ill-fitting music over the scenes that i found disturbing, it was wild! there were some good parts tho. i'm not sure if the writers just hate women with depression, or if it was all intentionally written as an absurdist portrayal of genuine human misery, like an existentialist play. regardless of intent, it was MASTERFUL as the latter. it was a piece of media written with no shred of emotional empathy towards the suffering of its cast. hbo can recreate this episode with the same script & create something incredibly gritty & dark.
anyway 4/10 needed more luanne
#king of the hill#shitpost#sorry for being an insane person#this is the wildest thing ive ever posted here#im not expecting anyone to actually ready this but if u do? ur a real one#analysis#hot take
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Chris Evans masterlist
Chris Evans HC
Going on a road trip with Chris and kiddos (headcannon)
Being married to Chris Evans would include(headcannon)
Chris Evans Imagines
imagine chris seeing you with a kid
imagine chris talking about the day you got married
imagine:chris broke up with you before you could tell him your pregnant
imagine:you and chris divorced and have two kids together/maybe it not to late to get back together
imagine chris talking about your twins
imagine chris seeing you for the first time
Imagine Chris seeing you with a kid after 2 years of being broken up (fluff)
Imagine Chris seeing you in a beautiful dress at an award show
Imagine your son thinking your so beautiful and he doesn’t want Chris to see you
Imagine Chris finding out his 3 year old has a boyfriend
Imagine your kids finding out that Chris is captain America
Imagine Chris being your neighbor and you wondering why didn’t put on pants.
Imagine Chris feeling like he failed as a father
Imagine Chris watching you play with his niece and nephew and he can’t help wonder how amazing you would be as a mom
Imagine Chris and your son telling the paparazzi no pictures
Imagine your son regret eating Wasabi
Imagine telling Chris that you want to make him a daddy on father’s day ~ smut
Chris Evans prompts
mamas boy 9&58
make me 48
i can’t keep kissing stranger and pretending their you 1,14&33
i forgive you 11
please marry me 32
hey just breath 29&10
92 and 84( smut)
76 and 91 ( angst, smut, fluff)
4 and 99(sad)
15 and 85(slightly angst, fluff)
quarantine proposal(fluff)
big fight (angst, fluff), breath with me (fluff)
shoulder pain(fluff)
thirsty tweet reveal (fluff)
he’s okay (angst, fluff, daddy Chris), period(fluff)
54&56(smut)
50,54,59(smut)
68&72(smut)
68,69,72(smut)
31,50,72(smut)
16,40(fluff)
Chris Evans:
exes to lover
8 letter
haters
accident happen how you think we …
heart eyes
daddy little fan
build a bear v teddy bear
baby love
falling like the stars
all way by your side
i will always protect you
rain can’t ruin the fun
give me nickname
your not a real fan
don’t touch her
im sorry
will you be there
i love you just the way you are
little valentine
best valentine day ever
admire your beauty
kick ass boyfriend
you and chris in quarantine
focus on my breathing
panic attack
sweater wearing dorks
i’m not good enough for you
moving to boston
beautiful in his eyes
have each other
strong mama
jealous chris
wear a longer skirt next time
i’m bored
that hurt my feelings
animal crossing
A place to sit ( smut)
Hot model (fluff, slightly smut)
Beautiful in his eyes ( fluff)
What!(angst, fluff)
Love me (smut)
Please forgive me(angst, fluff)
Bikini fun(smut, slight fluff)
Brazilian girl(smut)
Window (smut)
Hands(smut)
Dad’s friend (smut)
Chris Evans Fluff:
Not worth it || angst
You are the reason || fluff
Plane cancellation || fluff
Skype call || fluff
Back off, he’s mine || fluff, light Angst
Everything okay || fluff, light Angst
Social anxiety || fluff
Workout or dance party || fluff
Chris Evans Smut:
Fuck it || smut
Quick quiet sex || smut
Stuck with u || smut
Tapes || smut
His fingers are accurate || smut
Wild wet dream || smut
CEO barber || smut
Language || smut
Such a good mouth || smut
One bed || smut
Not so innocent maid || smut
Bathtub || smut
Daddy Chris:
Princess Chris ( fluff, daddy Chris)
Dance with me ( fluff, daddy Chris)
cuddle and kisses ( fluff, daddy Chris)
Late night protection (fluff, daddy Chris)
No kissing mama ( fluff, daddy Chris)
Helping daddy (fluff, daddy Chris)
Junk food convinced (fluff, daddy Chris)
3 month old talker( fluff, daddy Chris)
Twins ( fluff, daddy Chris)
Workout distraction (fluff, daddy Chris)
Reading a book (fluff, daddy Andy)
She’s growing up too fast (fluff, daddy Chris)
Little sister love (fluff, daddy Chris)
Shuts that out (fluff, daddy Andy)
Finally princesses (fluff, daddy Chris)
Busted (fluff, daddy Chris)
Bubbles (fluff, daddy Chris)
Not little anymore (fluff, daddy Chris)
New best friend (fluff, daddy Chris)
Skin to skin (fluff, daddy Chris)
Hungry baby, no (fluff, daddy Chris)
Peas (fluff, daddy Chris)
What are you doing Papa(fluff,daddy Chris)
Meeting little brother(fluff, daddy Chris)
Quarantine with kiddos(fluff, daddy Chris)
Mother’s day || dad! Chris
Memories || dad! Chris
Winnie the Pooh ||dad! Chris
Puppies || dad! Chris
Shy || dad! Chris
Bring us together || dad! Chris
Curly hair || dad! Chris
Quarantine baby || dad! Chris
Strawberries || dad! Chris
Bake a cake || dad! Chris
Sugar party || dad! Chris
Cuddles || dad! Chris
Morning with the Evans || dad! Chris
Disneyland || dad! Chris
FaceTime || dad! Chris
Pool day || dad! Chris
Big hands || dad! Chris
Not food || dad! Chris
Chris Evans oneshots:
Target - you lied and told Chris that you and your daughter weren’t going to target. He catches you both ~ Fluff
Double trouble maker - your twins break something and hide behind you, even though Chris isn’t mad ~ Fluff
Birthday special - Summary: it’s Chris’s birthday and since you both are still in quarantine, you want to give him a little show at home ~ smut
legal | Request : you wrote some dad figure!tom x teen actress!reader, can i get one with Chris Evans? maybe reader has been emancipated for awhile now n despite the fact that she’s been raising herself for a long time now, she still needs that parently guidance and maybe chris gives her that??? i hope that’s ok!! -🌙 ~ Fluff
Twins - I have a request, I was wondering if u can do a request, where the reader is African American and he and Chris are expecting towns, but they revel the news to Chris’s parents and your parents and also both of y’all grandparents?? ~ Fluff
Work this out - Can I request chris or henry tried to work through there divorce but end up with cute moments working it out ~ fluff
Princess - your Andy princess ~ smut
Surprise - I had another idea, what if Chris was being interviewed and you and your guys daughter who’s 4, came and surprised him, but once your daughter saw Chris she runs up to him and yells daddy!! - Fluff
Fort - Summary: it’s a rainy day and you, Chris, and your son build a fort ~ Fluff
Slobbery kisses - Chris wakes up to sloppy kisses by his baby ~ Fluff
Can’t sleep without you - Hi! can I request something where Chris and the reader had an argument and Chris goes to sleep in the couch, but in the middle of the night, the reader go to sleep with him there? Thanks! ~ slightly Angst, Fluff
Make up - Just after that quick one about fighting and sleeping separately could you do a quick imagine on the make up sex pls :)) ty ~ smut, Fluff
Tough guy -Can I ask for an imagine about the reader fighting with her husband Chris, about his family and the fight ending in rough sex? �� ~ kinda dark, smut
Giraffe slippers - Chris can’t get over your son’s giraffe slippers ~ Fluff
Switzerland - Summary: you, Chris and your son go on vacation to beautiful Switzerland ~ Fluff
Velvet - I found these prompts. They’re perfect ~ Fluff, implied smut
I’m scared, but I love you - Can u make where on how will cevans admit to a girl that he likes (or falling for) her and the girl is scared bc of the risk of dating him (privacy, fame, hate) and chris tells her he’s scared too but he’s willing to take a risk bc he can’t afford to see u w/ anyone else ~ Fluff
Interviewer - Summary: your a black interviewer and Chris couldn’t keep his eyes off of you. - smut, Fluff
Red dress - Request: After the oscars or whatever awards with Chris Evans, reader wearing a really sexy dress and even sexier lingerie ~ Fluff, implied smut
Softy -Request: Imagine Chris when he has a baby 🥺 I can honestly imagine how in love he’s gonna be in the delivery room getting handed his child. That man seriously makes my heart melt ~ Fluff
Who are you? - Request: can i request an image where chris comes back from filming and has a beautiful beard, but his baby daughter didn’t recognize him ~ Fluff
Empty theater - Request: you and chris go to the theaters and find out you two are the only one in the showing. You’re pretty invested into the movie and Chris is just horny 3000. He’s tryna fool around and you disregard him until he grabs your hand and puts it on his crotch and says in that insanely attractive Boston accent, “feel how hah’d you got me??” shweaty🤤 ~ smut
What moving in with Chris is like ~ Fluff
Long hair lover - Request: Can you write an imagine where Chris came back from filming red sea diving resort and his baby daughter is crazy in love with his long hair? ~ Fluff
Mean girl - Request: Hi, can you write one where the reader runs into a mean girl from school at supermarket and the girl start to brag for just saw Chris Evans. She doesn’t know that the reader is his wife, so the the mean girl has a little surprise when Chris find his wife at the line or something. ~ Fluff, slightly angst
Episode - Request: Hey are you taking request? I’m dark skinned chocolate and I’d love for Chris to comfort reader during a depressive episode. She’s the life of the party and she’s a new actress, not popular but she met Chris through mutual friends and he’s realized she’s been isolating herself lately, so he stops by her apt. to check in on her. She feels like she’s losing her mind. You can add smut. 😉 reader usually feels better after an episode buts its a serious battle and having support helps tremendously.😊 ~ Fluff, smut
Romantic day - Request: So Chris was asked in an interview if he ever had anyone do anything romantic for him and he had a hard time remembering. Can you write a fic where his girlfriend does something romantic for him? Like on a tooth rotting level of fluff. ~ fluff
Piglet - your daughter dress up as piglet from Winnie the Pooh ~ fluff
Bathroom and mirror - Request: Hey, I was wondering if I could request being at a party with Chris and he goes to the bathroom and you follow only for him to lift you on to the sink and eat your 🐱 then bend you over and fuck you hard watching you in the mirror ~ smut
Pink ribbon - Request: Okay but like I had this imagine in my head, like Chris is recording a video of his babygirl which is two months and he’s recording a video to help people with wants happening in the world to make then smile and then you hear a “grrr” and he’s like yes my daughter did learn how to growl before speaking thanks to dodger ! And he’s like so in love with the cutest bean to ever live ! And wife!reader be like watching this as she growls,dodger being proud! -🥺💕 ~ Fluff
Migraine - Request: Take as much time as you need 😜. I was about reader working at home on quarantine and she has this migraine so Chris takes care of her?? Could be a drabble, hc, blurb, whatever you wanna make of it ~ Fluff
Childhood bedroom - Request: Reader and Chris having sex in Chris’s childhood room when they visit his parents for a holiday (whichever you want) and Scott walking in on them ~ smut
Boomerang - Request: Can I request Chris Evans x Reader age gap where its her 10 high school reunion and back in high school she was over weight and was teased for it. Now she isnt and is engaged to Chris, but at the reunion she gets told by like an ex boyfriend an ex friend that Chris will leave her if she gets her weight back. Chris over hears this and is upset by it. Also could they make a remark like she is gaining weight again but she is pregnant like three months with a tiny bump (Maybe smut) Thank you ~ Angst, smut
Period - Request: can you do one abt chris when his girl is on her period ~ Fluff
4am car ride - Summary: at 4 in the morning Chris wakes you up to go on a car ride ~ Fluff
No Oscars - Request: Concept: reader consoling chris after he comes back from the oscars without any wins ~ Angst, fluff
Morning with the Evans - Summary: morning with 6 kiddos, 4 going to school. ~ Fluff
Wanna help? - Request: Hi there! What about Chris is in his bed reading a book as his wife were doing her routine of moisturizing her body and he start staring at her and she asks if he want to do the job for her. ~ smut
Mommy isn’t hot she’s warm
Message therapist - Request: I’m a massage therapist. I would love to see a wondering with CE and a therapist. She gets a one in a lifetime opportunity to massage the one and only, he sees her small stature and does not think she’ll be able to help him, but he is pleasantly surprised. He takes one look at her, and get simplicity and naturalness intrigues and consumes him. He’s on a mission to make her his, she’s wary. She’s wary because of her past and of what his intentions are. And doesn’t trust him right away. @creae7881 ~ Fluff
America’s ass - Summary: you make Chris celebrate that ass on its birthday `~ Fluff
Mechanic - Request: Hi! Wondering if you could make a story where Chris falls for a girl that’s a mechanic. I’ve been looking to pictures of the car Downey gifted him. She can be the one who built it. Thanks ~ @arabescapr ~ Fluff
Angry at you - Summary: Chris has to do some work and his daughter wants to play, but he can’t. She doesn’t like that. ~ Fluff
Virgin till married - Request: Hey! I really love your five and am a huge fan of your writing! Is there a way you could write a Chris fanfic in which the reader is a virgin and wants to save herself for marriage and it’s their honeymoon and she is gonna have sex for the first time with husband Chris.😙❤ It can be fluff and smut. Thank you! ~ smut
Secretly - Request: I have a request for Chris. Where the reader is a beautiful black plus-size woman and she and Chris are secretly dating, and one day they are spotted out and Chris panics and he has an interview and the interviewer asked him “who’s this girl u were spotted with” and Chris says I don’t know he personally she’s just a fan, and the reader watches the interview and gets heartbroken so she blocks him and changing a the locks to her house, and Chris finds out that she watched the interview. For the plus size request for Chris. I have to send another ask for same request because I didn’t have enough room to finish, but the reader starts avoiding and ignoring Chris, and Chris tries to get the reader to talk to him by showing up at her work, or bringing her flowers or her favorite food but she declines until one day she gets home and he’s on her doorstep and she starts walking by him ignoring him and he asks her just to talk to him please. Can there be a happy ending. ~ @briannab1234 ~ Angst, Fluff
After the show - Request: I’m sort of obsessed with the idea an anon sent in about the reader being a singer and her performing on stage and then him getting her home! I don’t know if you’re doing that already but if not can I request it for Chris Evans pleaseee ~ smut
Midnight return ~ Fluff, dad! Chris
You+me=perfect - Request: Hi! Just discovered your blog a few weeks ago and fell in love with your writing. I know requests are closed, but when you have time, could you do one where Chris and Reader (age gap) like each other and they know and everybody knows but when Reader makes a move he rejects her because since he wants a family he thinks reader is not ready for that. Please happy ending, 2020 is already too stressful :)~ Angst, Fluff
Your producing ice? - Request:Writing idea? Yk that game that Chris played with Jimmy Fallon where they poured the ice water down each other’s pants. Yeah yeah yeah. Just imagine going to give Chris a bj in the dressing room or something and there’s ice In his pants -🥺 but confused ~ smut, Fluff
Wine and sunset - Summary: you and Chris have been together for 3 years and now you got married to him. You both are on your honeymoon. He can’t help but keep his hands off of you. ~ smut, Fluff
No kissing ~ fluff,dad! Chris
At last I see the light - Request: Hi, can you please write Chris Evans x reader when he’s on the Graham Show and the other guest is a singer he have a crush on, she perform a song she recorded for the ‘We Love Disney’s album and he’s just in admiration please? ~ Fluff
Another princess?! - Summary: your pregnant and you and Chris finally figure out the gender of your baby. ~ Fluff
#chris evans#chris evans x reader#submission#Chris Evans imagines#Chris Evans x female reader#chris evans x plus size reader#chris Evans smut#dad!chris evans#Chris Evans x ofc
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official to get together with Ty. I mean, what?? Who does something like that if they were truly in love?// about this part technically they only became "official" publicly at that time because they never gave us an actual date as to when L and LV got together or even broke up and what makes it more confusing is that LV and L looked like they ended on good terms but then a few weeks later they unfollowed each other and LV was throwing shade at L and now they're not even friends.
Still here, not a hater nor a shipper Anon? I see that the first two times weren’t enough for you. Okay. Suit yourself.
“they never gave us an actual date as to when L and LV got together or even broke up”. Actually, we may not have specific day dates, but we do have dates to calculate everything.
As I’ve already explained, Lucy returned to Lauren’s life after she had a car accident on May 17, 2015:
“She came back into my life when I was 18. I was on tour and I was in my room in a hotel somewhere and she called me”, and, according to their narrative, Lauren decided they would be together “all in” and “now we’re gonna be in this relationship” from that moment on. The last public interaction between the two of them occurred on January 12, 2017 with that post for Lucy’s birthday (which is actually Jan 11):
And by January 21, 2017, they had already broken up since they were at the same Women’s March but with other people. While Lauren ‘was still together with’ Lucy, Ty tweeted “LMJ” on January 4, 2017:
He canceled it right away, and on February 12, 2017, Tyren made their first appearance as a ‘couple’ at the Grammys after-party (picture posted by L two days later):
If you calculate from mid-May 2015 to mid-January 2017, it’s 1 year and 8 months. And of that year and 8 months, 2 months were public due to the wedding pictures.
Lauren was already with Ty after less than a month. In fact, if you want to calculate from January 21 to February 12, it’s only 9 days. So, as you can see, we have dates on which base ourselves.
“Um let’s be realistic this literally happens all the time in real life”. Oh yeah? To who? To those who weren’t really in love and didn’t care about their exes maybe, but not to those who claimed to have been in love with their best friend since adolescence. You continue to be contradictory, Anon. Even in your own thoughts. Because if you believe in the Laucy narrative, then you’re supposed to believe that Lauren was in love with Lucy for five years (from when she was 15 to when she was 20). And if you believe that, then how can you think she fell out of love with her in less than a month? How can you think that’s realistic? Do you really give your fave so little credit? As I’ve already said, I don’t know you, so either you’ve never been in love and that’s why you think it’s realistic, or you do give Laur so little credit for real.
I’m gonna copy and paste the entire piece that you copied incompletely now: “How can you have been in love with someone for so many years, broke up with them because they were a toxic person, and immediately get together with an even more toxic person without having the proper time to heal? Without taking the time for yourself to lick your wounds, grow up, be ready again to throw yourself out there, and eventually find a better person to be in a relationship with? How? Simple. Because they were both fake relationships. The timing they wanted to tell is not credible. None of what they’ve said is believable, and luckily, there’s also enough evidence to prove it so these are not opinions and theories”.
When you love someone, Anon, when you really love someone and you’re not with them anymore, you need time. You really need some time before you can move on. Less than a month is not enough to fall out of love after 5 years and start another relationship by declaring to be in love with this other person every five seconds. I really don’t understand how you can think it’s realistic, and most of all, I really don’t understand how you don’t see it was all fake.
“and who says Ty was a toxic person cause so far L has never said anything bad about him and he treated her right from what we have seen, also the fact that their ‘split’ was peaceful so how was he toxic for her?”. So, let me get this straight. Someone who thinks that ‘the women only serve to be in the kitchen’, that ‘the lesbians only are confused girls’, that:
and that he’s:
is not a toxic person? Someone who’s been in a gang (like his brother who’s still in jail) since he was a teenage boy and has a long list of felonies on his record for infractions, assaults, and possession of various drugs, isn’t toxic? Someone who lies about his age and is disrespectful in the lyrics in his songs and when he speaks in general with phrases in which he had no respect for either women or homosexuality, is not toxic? Someone for whom it’s normal to punch and kick another celebrity in the head just because he refused to leave and free for him the VIP room of a club he was occupying, is not toxic? Someone who wanted to make a blind woman move who was sitting behind him with her guide dog, claiming to be allergic to the fur that was making him sneeze, and despite the fact that the plane staff offered him another seat in the back, which he refused because ‘he had paid extra to be in the one he was sitting in’, and the blind woman even offered him an allergy pill, he refused AGAIN with the excuse that he ‘had to perform’ a few hours later at the Escapade Music Festival (the woman obviously had priority over her seat and wasn’t moved, so they all stayed in their seats in the end), is not toxic?
Are you for real?? Do you really think Lauren could actually have been with a person like that? Someone who represented exactly what she always despised? Do you really think so low of her? You say she’s your fave, but do you know her at all? Because you’re basically insulting her as a person and her intellect. When will you learn to distinguish reality from fiction? When are you gonna open your eyes? If Lauren were to tell you that Santa’s real, then you’d believe it just because the words came out of her mouth? Come on now! Just because she was forced to say that she loved him and how a good person he was, DOESN’T MAKE IT TRUE. Not to mention that we’ve witnessed several times how uncomfortable she was when they had to look intimate for pictures:
And how inappropriate he was:
https://youtu.be/g3D_FMHy4ho
Don’t you see how she tried to move his hand and how uncomfortable she was? And these are just two examples, but there are so many of them. Wake up and learn to recognize the distinction between script-following Laur and authentic Laur. I already told you this.
No, I’m the one who’s sorry here. Because as I said, you can’t distinguish when something is fake and when it’s real. I was there. You seem to have forgotten this. I saw every post, every picture, and every live they did together. They were together. They obviously couldn’t say it because Lucy ‘was together’ with Laur, but they were together. It wasn’t a serious relationship like the one with Nicole, but they still had something. They stayed together until February and then Lucy got together with Nicole in March.
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I hope this can also answer your ask, dear Anon 😄 and hi to you too 👋🏼
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Back to you, not a hater nor a shipper Anon. Keep blaming CS and believing every single thing your faves say if you want, but do yourself a favor: stop trying to change someone’s mind (with empty proofs) and try to convince them to think like you. It’s useless. As I already told you in that post: “You can come back here a hundred more times, but you won’t change my mind”. Just accept it. Just accept the fact that we think differently because we believe in different things. Follow the blogs that think like you if you want, create your own blog with your own opinions or whatever, but don’t go to CS ones like mine because you wouldn’t come out as a winner, as you could see all three times. It’s one thing to go to another blog to express your opinion, and another is to go there multiple times and insist on changing their minds. Unlike you, I don’t go bothering other blogs to convince them to believe in what I believe. In fact, if that’s why, I don’t really care to change their minds precisely because, as I already told you, everyone is free to think what they want and have their own ideas. I accept the fact that not everyone thinks the same way. Embrace this idea too, trust me, you'll live better. Find your community and be happy there.
I hope I’ve been even clearer than the previous times. Take care, not a hater nor a shipper Anon, and have a good day. I hope you’ll find what you’re looking for.
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Okay, so I’ve talked before about the many problems I have with James Ironwood’s semblance ‘Mettle’ here, but I wanted to make a post about what changes I personally would make to James’s semblance and how I would put it into practice in the show.
This is pro James Ironwood content. Ironwood haters, don’t @ me, don’t interact.
1. Change the phraseology and the way the semblance is presented.
I would present it as a literal form of mind control, where his semblance makes him do whatever it takes to accomplish a set goal. Phrasing it as increasing his stubbornness and focus to the point where other things fall by the wayside makes it seem like his semblance just makes character traits much stronger, villainizes those traits, and is insensitive to people that hyper-fixate and can’t help that. Phrasing his semblance instead as centered around making him do whatever it takes to accomplish a goal, even if that changes who he is, is better in my opinion.
2. Change his semblance from passive to active
This is good for a couple of reasons. People can’t control their passive semblances, which A. leaves James looking almost completely sympathetic (since, you know, he can’t fully control his actions) and it also leaves the casual viewer wondering what’s James and what’s his semblance. Did he bring his ships to Vale of his own volition or was it his semblance? Did he close the borders to Atlas himself or is it his semblance? Did he shoot Oscar himself, or was it his semblance? Etc. Etc. Making his semblance something that he himself chooses to use despite recognizing that it’s dangerous both gives James some level of culpability and it makes it much clearer to the audience what’s James’ personality and what is done under the influence of his semblance. I would make it so that James can turn on his semblance, but rarely ever does, because when he turns it on, he can’t make himself turn it off, and he can’t control himself or his responses in that state. I would make it so the only ways for James’s semblance to turn off again is if his goal is completed, his aura breaks, or he dies.
3. Make his semblance use clear through visual cues
Honestly, this one isn’t as needed as the other two, but it just makes it much easier to understand and A. gives the audience another way to be clued in to when James is or isn’t under the affects of his semblance, and B. gives the characters a way to be clued in to when James is or isn’t under the affects of his semblance.
In the first Avengers, when someone got possessed, their eyes would turn black and then turn a certain color of blue. A similar thing could happen with James, his eyes lightening, even if it was really subtle.
Also a change in body language would make for a subtle, but nice shift. James tends to put his arms behind his back, he tends to look people in the eye when he’s talking to them, he sighs, he acts tired out, he acts a little awkward, he gives little physical signs of affection like a shoulder to the hand, or a hug, or smiling softly. Having him do none of these things - keeping his arms at his sides, not looking at people when he talks to them or they talk to him, acting perfectly alert, not ever showing his more affectionate, warm, or awkward sides - all would make it clear that there’s something off. James isn’t acting like himself. To be totally fair to the show, there’s for sure some of that ‘James isn’t acting like himself’ stuff in the show, buuuut to be totally honest about the show, it’s clear we’re meant to see James as just an evil villain and his semblance isn’t even mentioned in the show, so... Yeah.
So in my ideal version, James’s semblance is an active semblance he can’t turn off, that forces him to accomplish a set goal no matter what and will even change his morality and base personality in order to achieve it, and it has visual cues like a change in body language and eye color shifting. Another thing to note is that James’s semblance is a secret, even to many of his confidants. The people that James has told about his semblance are Qrow and Ozpin.
Now to apply it to the show.
Adding an extra scene into the early episodes of V7.
Qrow enters James’s office and the two start talking about James’ plans. Qrow notes that it all still seems like ‘a bit much’ and James dismisses this concern, talking about how drastic times call for drastic measures, and they have to do whatever they can to stop Salem. Qrow has a moment’s pause and a guilty look (since he’s keeping the secret of Salem being immortal,) but then narrows his eyes and asks James “Is that you or your semblance talking?”
James sighs, he says “You know I don’t use my semblance.” Qrow looks unconvinced, and James turns to face him a little more fully. They lock eyes and Qrow seems satisfied, nodding a little and turning away again. James asks Qrow to trust him, and Qrow agrees, with the qualification that James has to let him - and the others - help him instead of taking it all on himself, which James also agrees to, if not a little reluctantly.
Later in the episode ‘Gravity’ when Ironwood makes the choice to leave Mantle, he does so clearly under his own power. As Team RWBY start opposing him and after realizing they’ve gone behind his back, we see James hesitate. He takes a deep breath with his back to the girls and the Ace Ops and then triggers his semblance, his aura lighting up for a minor moment and his eyes shifting color to a lighter blue. The Ace Ops and Team RWBY all have a split second moment of confusion - seeing his aura flash - but then James turns and that’s when he declares he’s going to enact martial law. The scene continues on as is, with Ruby contacting the others and the Ace Ops going to arrest Team RWBY, etc.
Meanwhile, Qrow, Robyn, and Clover are all left confused and uncertain, and then receive the order for everyone’s arrest, including Qrow. Cue more confusion, and Qrow says there must be some sort of mistake. Robyn starts up the fight, Clover and Qrow try to de-escalate things, and in this version of things, Qrow doesn’t really join in the fight (Oh, I should note, I’m also erasing the Oz-punch in this version because I can do whatever I want.) When the plane goes down, he’s still trying to defend and make sense of things, but Tyrian’s coming on strong, taking advantage of Clover trying to make sure Qrow can’t get away - since he literally doesn’t know that Qrow isn’t a criminal - and Qrow being unwilling to fight Clover, and Tyrian kills Clover himself. Qrow’s distraught and affected, but doesn’t blame James, and Tyrian gets away.
He and Robyn are both arrested, and meanwhile, James and Oscar’s confrontation happens, and right before Ironwood shoots him, Oscar realizes that his eyes are different, but is then shot. In season eight and in jail with Robyn, Jacques, and Watts, we see Qrow frustrated and upset as the three argue back and forth, and all three of them are blaming Ironwood, when Qrow gets up and again starts trying to say there’s been some kind of mistake. Robyn says he’s putting too much faith in Atlas’s higher ups, and Qrow says that she just doesn’t know James like he does - which is true. When the guards come to take Watts away, Qrow says “That isn’t like him,” And Robyn rolls her eyes, but we see Qrow’s eyes widen in realization and he tells Robyn that James must’ve triggered his semblance.
Meanwhile, Oz (now back and getting the lowdown on everything from Oscar) speculates on whether or not James’s semblance is affecting his choices, but the both of them agree that they’re not 100% sure if they can give James the benefit of that doubt after Lionheart and everyone else that’s ever betrayed Oz (Note this also leaves a place where at least Oscar can say he’s sorry for how the Jinn/backstory thing went down.) Oscar doesn’t ask how James’s semblance works and Oz only really mentions that it alters his behavior. Oscar doesn’t tell the others Oz is back and Oscar doesn’t mention the semblance to the others, since neither of them are sure if it’s really at play.
Next time we see them, Robyn is pressing Qrow for details on James’s semblance and he tells her what it does and how it works. Robyn isn’t sure, but Qrow insists. He does wonder why James even turned it on and takes a moment to be angry that he did when he knows how dangerous it is - and maybe makes some comment about ‘if I could keep mine off, I’d never use it.’ Robyn hesitates, and then says “Well, I trust you, Qrow. If you say it’s his semblance, and that’s what’s really putting Mantle at risk... Then how do we stop it?” The two start making a plan to break out of the jail to get to Ironwood so they can help him.
Meanwhile, everything with Ironwood keeps escalating, the Ace Ops are still following his orders, they try to arrest Penny, delivering the bomb to the whale, find Team JRY, Winter makes her compromise, Cinder breaks in to free Watts, yada yada. When the Ace Ops bring the bomb back to Ironwood and it’s revealed Qrow and Robyn have escaped, James starts talking about how he should’ve used Qrow to get to Penny, could’ve used Penny’s friends against her, and then decides to drop the bomb on Mantle. And Winter clearly figures out something is wrong and starts getting suspicious and freaked. She tries to talk him out of it and tells him “this isn’t you, why are you doing this?” but James will barely look at her and keeps insisting, and finally she ‘agrees,’ but clearly seems perturbed and very unhappy with it.
Meanwhile, seeing the bomb threat puts Oz over the edge of thinking this is James affected by his semblance. Both he and Oscar still aren’t totally sure, but bring it up to Ruby and the others, and there’s a moment of “What the heck, another secret” before Oscar defends Oz “We didn’t know for sure, there was so much going on, I’m the one who didn’t think to mention it, it wasn’t our secret to tell,” and Jaune or something quickly says they don’t have time to argue anyway, and everyone moves on. No one is sure that it’s just James’s semblance, but Ruby declares that they have to try and break his aura and trust that there’s a fix - keeping the themes consistent, what with Emerald easily accepted right there. However, there’s still Salem reforming and the virus infecting Penny to think of, so they start making their whole plan as it is in the real show.
When Winter helps Marrow escape, she tells him that there’s something very wrong with James (even noticing about his eyes,) and he - like Robyn - thinks she’s just putting too much faith in him, and Winter sadly says that maybe he’s right, but that she just would never have believed he’d do something like that, insisting that his other choices made sense, that every war takes sacrifice, but this was just too far, cruel, evil, even. Marrow gets more serious and agrees. Qrow and Robyn, having escaped, start realizing everything that’s happening, they start to become even more frantic to find James and break his aura, which kicks into overdrive when they hear the message saying they only have an hour to go before James drops a bomb on Mantle. Qrow says “James is never going to forgive himself if that happens,” and Robyn declares “I’ll never forgive him if that happens.” Qrow gets angry and Robyn gets angry in response, reminding Qrow - and the audience - that James is the one who chose to turn his semblance on.
When the two run into Winter and Marrow, Winter starts telling them that James is planning to bomb Mantle, and Qrow gives her a quick low-down of James’s semblance. Winter then gets a quick “I knew it,” moment. Winter convinces Qrow she’ll break James’s aura or die trying and for him and Robyn to focus on getting the other Ace Ops out of commission since James will let her get close enough to land a strong enough hit. Qrow is really reluctant to leave it in her hands, but she assures him “I’m not going to let the General destroy himself,” and Qrow - despite his clear early problems with Winter, says “I know you won’t.” The fight goes down pretty much the same, with the kids still all going hard and Winter getting in the final hit that puts James out of commission. Nora, Jaune, and Oscar are all like “Did that do it, is he back to how he should be?” And Winter says she’ll bring him to a medical room. Nora and Jaune exchange an unsure look, Nora ventures “Just a medical room?” And Winter sighs, looks a little unsure herself, but then nods. Ozpin then speaks up, saying “She’s right. I... I trust him. I have to trust him.” Jaune, Nora, and Ren then agree, nodding, and then things start continuing like normal, only Winter is keeping Ironwood in a medical room instead of a jail cell.
When James wakes back up, he’s himself again. He has to deal with the fact that because of his choice to turn his semblance on, he almost caused destruction and death to innocent people at his own hand and when there was absolutely no real reason to. He has to grapple with the hurt he caused as well as knowing he literally had no control and couldn’t even feel horror or guilt over what he was doing in the moment. He could go on to Vacuo, but he knows the general population of Atlas and Mantle won’t just accept that it was his semblance at work. He’s going to be hated, maybe even arrested as a villain, his position and his ability to lead that he’s strived for in an effort to help whoever he can is gone, many of the people who were his allies will never look at him the same way again, he hurt Penny so much, and he can’t just get rid of that because he never meant to and hadn’t been able to control it - and it was still because he made the choice to turn on his semblance in the first place. But. No, in this version, he doesn’t die, and Qrow would talk to him and connect with him again somewhere down the line, and when James started berating himself, Qrow would softly and sympathetically say
“You idiot. I know you didn’t do this.”
This is by no means perfect. This is by no means without flaw. And I know my Ironqrow shipping impacted it, but you know what? I don’t care. I wrote this for me. This is the headcanoned version that’s going to live in my head rent free, canon or otherwise.
#rwby criticism#anti rwby#james ironwood#pro james ironwood#ironwood defense#pro ironwood#james ironwood defense#Again any Ironwood haters don't interact
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How about modern Steggy meeting at Pride? Both bi, but that's not why she's there, she's there cause her young child is trans and she's not letting them grow up ashamed of this ("Even if it does turn out to be a temporary questioning 'phase', I won't let them ever be ashamed of being who they are."). Cause like 10 year old Carter child who's a little antsy to be there, Peggy with bi-pride tipped curls, and Steve with the trans flag painted on his cheek
OP YOUR MIND!! They would fiercely protect the Carter Child, not that Steve thinks she can’t do it, but he’s downright feral at times when it comes to kids in danger. This might not be what you had in mind, so I do apologize. This got ahead of me is quite long.
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“Ignore them,” Bucky breathed in Steve’s ear, tugging on the blonde’s hand to get him away from the protesters that are somehow legally allowed here. This was borderline abuse if you asked him. Sure, freedom of speech but it was quickly cut off when you yelled at children and elderly people for being themselves.
Steve growled under his breath and tugged his hand away from Bucky’s, careful not to touch the drying trans flag painted across his cheek. Natasha would be furious if he messed up her work. Or touch the chalk-dye of the flag in his hair.
“I’m fine,” he grumbled, despite Bucky didn’t look like he’d believed him. The guy stood out like a Christmas tree, literally with the bi flag colors wrapped around the metallic arm and shining bright enough to land a plane. “Just go find Clint, I’m going to walk off. Need to cool down.”
Before the man could say a thing, Steve was stomping off, in midst of the crowd to get away from his rightfully worried, best friend.
The last he expected was when he emerged from the other side of the crowd was to be tackled-hug by a ten-year-old child with bright hazel eyes, a buck-tooth grin, the same colors in his hair dyed on their hair, and wearing a shirt that read, ‘i’m the trans kid your parents warned you about.’
Steve fell to his backside to avoid instinct-wise to protect himself, an arm wrapped around the kid to prevent any of them from being trampled over by the crowds rushing from one stand to another.
“You’re Captain Ameria!” The kid sat upon his chest, still bright-eyed, kneeling rather painfully. “You’re Steve Rogers! I did reports about you.” They were actively bouncing up and down and Steve was doing his best to school the pain the sharp knees caused.
“I am,” he grunted. “Can we keep it to a whisper, son? It’s a secret.” He pressed his finger to his lips to indicate hush, hush until he saw the kid’s eyes widen and go glassy. “Oh no, no. Hey, hey, did I say something wrong?” He sat up and the kid latched on, imitating what Steve imagine what it was like to hug a Khola.
His arms wrapped around the kid and gently held them close, kissing their temple in a show of calming them down. What could he say? He still had parental instinct installed in him from his mother.
He could feel the kid’s sobs against his chest, feel their fingers dig into his shirt, refusing to let go while he tried to calm them down. If anyone noticed Captain America clinging to a sobbing kid, no one stopped to say a thing.
“Michael?! Michael!”
A breathless woman with flushed cheeks, the same brown eyes, and her hair dyed in the bi flag colors scrambles to them. She drops to her knees beside them and slides the last few steps, looking from her child to Steve.
“I-I don’t know -” Steve breathed, a panic looked etched on his face. “They tackled me and I-I fell and-and accidentally said son, a-a force of habit and they started crying. Did I say the wrong thing?”
The woman’s eyes lit up with recognition as to who Steve was before her face softened, tenderly laying a hand on the back of Michael’s hair and stroking it out of the way. “No,” she breathed. “No, you said the right thing. The perfect thing for them to hear. They ideologize you and always have. I guess seeing you here is...well, overwhelming. Michael, love, we got to let the Captain go.”
Slowly peeling away from him, the kid sniffles and rubs at their face, smearing the flag’s paint without realizing it. His face is flushed and eyes red, with tears still in them. He looks almost ashamed as he climbs from Steve’s lap to his mom’s. He could hear the murmurs of an apology.
“Hey now,” Steve breathed, fully sitting up now. “There’s nothing to apologize for.” He can’t help himself in tossing the guy’s hair and wiping away a stray tear. It makes the kid smile, at least. “You were just excited and overwhelmed, there’s a big crowd here today, huh? And I guess...me calling you son didn’t help did it? Just burst that bubble.” When the kid flushed, Steve just gave a helpless smile. “When my ma first called me Steve, I cried so hard I managed to throw myself into a panic attack.”
“I bet that did nothing to help the asthma,” the mother muses, giving Steve a fond smile. At Steve’s surprised look, she shrugs. “I might be a Brit, but I grew up on your story, Mr. Rogers. I’m Peggy, by the way. This is Michael.”
Steve shakes their hand and nods. “No, it didn’t. Managed to give myself a nose bleed too. It’s good to meet you two. Here, let’s get up before we’re trampled.” Getting the pair off of the ground, Steve brushes the grass stains off of their clothes out of habit. “I take it it’s your first pride?”
“For both of us,” Peggy muses, kissing her embarrassed son’s cheek. “Michael wanted to go to his first pride since coming out and I wasn’t going to tell him no. We’ve already been yelled at by them.” The tone alone tells Steve well enough who them is.
“Tell me about it. I’ve already gotten into two screaming matches before my friends had to drag me away.”
“That was you? Crickey, no wonder people looked nervous. Well, yes they’ve called me quite a few names already. Child abuser. Pedophile. Rapist. Disgusting, barbaric group.” She sets Michael down and hugs him close to her frame. “Even if this is a phase, I don’t care. I’m going to support and love my child regardless. They do not deserve to be ashamed of themselves.”
Steve’s eyes fall to Michael whose still staring up at him like he’s the moon and stars and it makes him both antsy and warms his heart. “I wish I had that line of thinking,” he sighs, shaking his head. “Not that I’m ashamed of who I am, anyone with the right knowledge can research about me, history can’t erase that forever, but...the backlash one could’ve received in my time...it leaves a mark on you.”
It was a struggle in his mentality. Steve supported, openly every LGBT organization, spoke out against protestors, and haters. Donated large, marginal amounts of money, but when it came to speaking about his struggle and making an ‘official’ public remark? That’s when he backed out.
“But Mr - Captain…” Michael sputtered, tugging on Steve’s shirt.
“Steve.”
“S-Steve.” He was still breathy from the crying spell but his excitement to get to call his obvious hero by his name was etched into his face. “There are lots and lots and lots of people who would be happy to know that you’re like us too! You might get people mad at you but then they weren’t fans of you in the first place if they don’t support your decision. I know lots of my friends would know and be happy to know that you’re a-a-a trans guy like me!”
Well, what in the hell could he say to that? He looked from the smart kid up to his mother who just smiled and shrugged her shoulders. “He’s right, you know?”
“Yeah,” he breathed, rubbing at the back of his neck. “Yeah, I do. I think you’re right, Michael, I shouldn’t hide who I am. Been asleep far too long and I think I got work to do to fix this mess.” He paused for a moment, reaching into his jeans to hand Peggy a business card [Tony’s idea] with a hologram of himself in his uniform and saluting, his name and personal number on the back.
“Call me tonight? I want to talk to you about this. I have to go.”
His eyes flew to something past the pair and Peggy’s neck craned to see over the crowd, clicking her tongue as she spotted what Steve had seen.
If it was just her, she’d help, but Michael was here and perhaps didn’t need to see his hero fighting a bunch of bigots. He was still quite sensitive to violence, the poor thing.
“Okay,” she agreed, scooping her son up and tucking his head into her neck. “You go do that.” She paused to kiss his cheek. “And be safe, please.”
--
That’s how, two days later, Steve finds himself standing in the very park Pride had taken place, on the portable stage with his team behind him. He still sported a black eye, almost healed but the remains of a yellow bruise were still there. His ribs ached from being kicked, but he was still standing. It was on the news for days how Steve Rogers and Bucky Barnes and Clint Barton ruthlessly attacked a bunch of peaceful protesters.
Peaceful, my ass.
They didn’t see the symbols they carried, the signs, the proud man who stood in front of them? Steve wasn’t standing in 2013 anymore, he was in 1943 and standing before a german officer, wearing the same grin on his face. He knew his choices, the power of his voice, and money, and knew them well. He also knew what the other side of Steve’s fist felt like against his jaw.
“They were Nazis,” he tells Tony over dinner, rolling his eyes. Peggy’s on speaker between them, having just gotten done lecturing him. “I don’t give two shits what the media says.”
“Language,” Peggy muses, though Steve can hear the smile in her voice. “I have a son.”
“Whose asleep,” Tony interjects. “Cursing is allowed when the kidlets are asleep.”
“Says you.”
Steve rolls his eyes at them and downs the rest of his beer. “Pepper is gonna smooth it out, anyhow. I’m not making some public statements on how sorry I am ‘cause I ain’t. Don’t show up to an event and not expect a backlash. They’re lucky that’s all we did was break a few bones. Maybe it’ll teach ‘em next time. Besides, they attacked us. We gave them clear enough warning not to touch us.”
They had formed a barricade, protect those Pride Idiots from charging inside while the cops did nothing. Even Tony had to call in a few suits and help, Pepper immediately on the scene with her trusted news crew.
“I ain’t worried about it,” He continues, shrugging.
“Spoken like a true American,” Peggy teases, making Steve flush. “So have you given any thought to our earlier conversation?”
Tony’s staring at him from across the way, Steve’s started to nervously play with the end of his binder. “Yeah,” he sighs. “Yeah, I have. I’ll call you with the details.”
Taking in a deep breath to calm his nerves, Steve’s eyes scan the crowd. He knows there are a few of those Pride Boys out there, but he can’t make them out. He doesn’t care to. They wouldn’t dare to attack a stage when Captain America stands in full uniform and his team behind him. Pepper had brought out her news crew again, live broadcasting this emergency meeting, as well as a few other news sources.
She’s smiling at him from the side, giving him the thumbs up.
Steve’s eyes fall to Bucky whose gotten up with Clint and stood beside him, giving his shoulder a squeeze. “About time you’re doing this, though you owe Dugan 50 quid for this,” Bucky teases, leaning up to just barely kiss Steve’s cheek in a public display of affection. “I’m proud of you.”
Clint’s beside them, towering over Bucky, holding the life out of Bucky’s flesh hand and pulling him close. His head tilts to the side and signs to Steve, asking if he’s ready.
Steve nods, his eyes finally falling to the two people who got this started. Peggy Carter and her son. Michael runs up to him from the side of the stage when they arrive, climbing onto Steve’s shoulders like he’s always belonged there. Steve can’t help the laugh he lets out as he grips Michael’s legs around his chest to keep him secure. Peggy, for her own sake, smiles as she stands beside Steve, Bucky moving over to let her get closer.
“Alright,” He sighs into the microphone, perhaps too close. “Let’s get this over with.” He pauses, counts his heartbeats, feeling them in his throat. “It goes without saying, who I am and whose in my company, but I think we need to make some personal facts clear in the light of recent news.”
He stills and takes in a sharp breath, eyes scanning the vast crowd before he feels Peggy’s hand on the small of her back.
“My name is Steve Rogers and I am a transgender guy.” There’s a mixture of stilled silence and gasp throughout the crowd, followed by intense murmurs. Yet no one raises their hand or shouts questions. Pepper has these guys whipped. Good.
“That might come as a surprise to some of you and regardless of your personal opinion, I do not care. Let me restate that, I do not care if you support me or don’t. I want one fact and one fact made clear, if you decide to attack me, my friends, or anyone for being who in the hell they are, no amount of legal fear and paperwork will stop me from doing what I think is right to rectify that situation.”
“I was thankful to have heavy support during my time serving, before, and after, and even waking up here. It was recently brought to my attention as to what me coming out officially could do for the young LGBT youth and I am only sorry it’s taken this long for me to realize it.”
“To be fair,” Peggy muses. “You’ve been a little busy.”
Steve laughs, unable to help himself. “A tad bit.” He squeezes her to his side and presses a small kiss to her temple. “Now,” he speaks into the microphone. “If anyone else is curious, I’m bisexual too. And in this recent news, my team and I have gotten together to design a program to help the LGBT youth seek the sanctuary they deserve. This means after school programs for all ages, cafes, safe bars, book stores, all opened 24/7 to offer them help. There are homeless shelters in place that will help the youth kicked out, programs we’re establishing to help with anything from name changes to hormones, to funds to get back on their feet. Counseling as well for any who wish to seek it. Adoptive parents who figuratively would want to ‘adopt’ and assist the youth.”
“Who’s paying for all this?! It sounds like -”
The reporter, someone in the midst of the crowd, that Steve can’t see is instantly shut up when Clint charges off the stage and heads in his direction and pulls the man up to his feet by the collar of his neck.
“Who in the hell do you think is?” He snaps. “I wish these programs were around when I was a kid, then maybe I wouldn’t had destroyed my body using makeshift binders that hurt me. These kids, adults, whatever will get the help they need. If you have a problem with it, then I suggest you shut the hell up.”
“Thanks, Clint,” Steve breathes, jerking his head at Bucky to go get his boyfriend. “In a better sense of words, I am. Now, any questions?”
There’s a hell of a lot of questions that go over Steve’s head.
When did your name change? What’s in your pants? Did you have surgery? Did you have bottom surgery? Is that kid yours? Are they paying you to say this?
There’s plenty of statements too, raging from support but more often protest and the second it gets rowdy, it’s put to a stop when Natasha and Tony are strolling around the crowd.
Bucky and Michael are right - this is a long time coming. The youth, the people of today deserved to know who Steve truly was. Not that he’s ever denied himself. They deserve to know that he would do anything to protect them, even if it involves a few legal cases of punching a Nazi here or there.
Michael was certainly right, the youth of today deserved to know who had their back, and how proud he was to come home one day and run straight into Steve’s arms while his mum was at work, to tell him how he stood up to his bully and made sure the substitute teacher called him by his real name and how he got to tell them that his new dad was Captain America.
#Steggy#Steggy Prompt#Nonny Prompt#Bisexual Peggy Carter#Bisexual Steve Rogers#Bisexual Bucky Barnes#Transguy Clint#Transguy Steve Rogers#Peggy's lil kid is trans too#tw transphobia#tw slurs#I hope this doesn't offend anyone somehow#despite being trans i tried to write this carefully too
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Nervous <Two>
Chapter 2
Chris and Lena pulled up to Marylea’s house. Despite being incredibly nervous about lunch with Chris, Lena was actually able to relax and let her guard down.
“Sorry to keep you out late. But did you at least have a good time?”
“Honestly, yes. It’s been a while since I’ve been able to have an adult conversation without worry about little ears listening or having to stop every so often to make sure she is ok.”
“Well, I’m glad to give you a little break. I can’t imagine it’s easy doing it all alone.”
Chris could only imagine all the stuff she has had to deal with on her own. It probably doesn’t help with having anxiety. But if she is able to have a good time maybe it will help easy her.
“It’s not all that bad but I wouldn’t change the feeling for anything in the world. She is a good baby.”
“That’s good to hear. Can’t wait to meet her.” He replies. He doesn’t want to let her go but knows she spent most of her day on a plane and should have some bonding time with her bestie. “So tomorrow what are you doing?”
“Probably sleep. Why?”
“Well if Marylea is working all day. I can keep you company and do some cheesy sight seeing.”
Lena’s eyes grow slightly larger, she wasn’t expecting that. “Ummm. Sure.”
“I mean you don’t have to if you don’t want to just figured we could continue to hang out and I have nothing on my schedule. It’s kind of boring to be home alone all day.”
Hearing his reason Lena slightly regrets her reply to an innocent question. “No, that sounds like a good idea. Just nothing too early. I have a feeling Marylea will wanna do some drinking so yeah. Might be slightly hungover.”
“Gotcha. Are you a party girl?”
“Maybe back in the day. Once I got married and had Eevee, that feeling kind of went away. You know?”
“Understandable. We all have those party animal moments right?”
“Exactly.”
The pair grew quiet thinking about how they both use to party hard but have grown up and stopped acting like children.
“Can I have your phone to put my number in?” Lena smiles and hands her phone over to Chris. “So I’ll call or text around 10 ok?”
“Awesome sauce.” Without thinking Lena leans over gives Chris a quick hug and small peck on the cheek and runs inside before he could open the door for her. “Bye” she yells from the front door before walking inside.
What a woman, he thinks as he pulls off.
********************************************
“Well, well, well, look who finally decides to come home?” Marylea says as she gets up from the couch. “Were you guys making out?”
“Funny but no. We just had lunch at a small restaurant and talked. A lot.”
“Talked? That’s it. You went out on a date with Chris Evans and all you did was talk?”
Lena gives Marylea a look. “Yes. Just talking. Sorry that I didn’t bang him on the first date.”
“Just kidding. But it’s good to know you had a nice time.” Marylea replies as she opens up a bottle of wine. “So do you like him or like him like him?”
“He’s a nice guy.”
“You are avoiding the question.” Marylea hands Lena a glass of wine. “I’ll ask again when you are tipsy. I mean he isn’t my type but I’m not dead. He’s gorgeous.”
Lena takes a few sips of wine and kicks off her shoes, planting herself next to Marylea on the couch. “I don’t know if I like him like him. I honestly just met the guy.”
A few hours and drinks later. . .
“So he is sexy. But I doubt I’m his type.”
“Why would you say that? He legit picked you! Stop selling yourself short. You are worthy of happiness.”
“I feel like I already had my happiness with Ezra. I don’t know if I need or deserve someone else.”
Marylea looks at her friend like she is crazy. Lena had changed a little bit after meeting Ezra. Even though Lena would never admit it but he could be slightly verbally abuse and make Lena think no one else would ever want her. Hearing her best friend say that broke her heart. “You and I both know that isn’t true. You are worthy of all of it. Hence why I set you up with him.”
“You really think I’m worthy of Chris freaking Evans?” Marylea nods at her; Lena shrugs and picks up her phone. “Ok. Fine. I’ll text him then.”
“Wait, you’ve had his number this entire evening and didn’t tell me or anything?”
“My bad?” Lena gives her a tipsy smile. “What should I say?”
“What do you wanna say? And isn’t a little late?”
They both looked at the clock. 2:45 in the morning. It was a little late or early however you look at it but Lena has a look of determination. “I’ll just thank him for the lunch and I’ll see him tomorrow.”
“Boring but ok. When do you plan to see him again?”
“Tomorrow hopefully.”
“Oh really now.”
“He figured we could do something since you have to work.”
Marylea takes a shot of tequila and make a funny face. “Well isn’t that super sweet.”
“Hater.”
Marylea throws her hands up in the air. “Hey now. I wasn’t hating just saying that it was sweet. Especially considering you were just to do a few events with him. Nothing more or less.”
“Ma’am I don’t think I like your tone or where you are gong with that comment.”
Lena replies taking a shot of tequila.
“Just saying he might like you like you. With his PENIS!”
Lena looks shocked but happy at the possibilities. “Shut up!” She squeals as she throws a pillow at her friend, Marylea dodges the pillow and sticks her tongue out at Lena. “Do you think he might like me with his penis?” She asks in a humorous whisper.
“You never know if you don’t try to get to know him. Meaning don’t blow him off tomorrow.” Lena rolls her eyes and shakes her head. "I know he hasn’t been gone long but I highly doubt he wants you to be alone the rest of your life. Just give him and the whole experience a chance.”
“I know and I will try just makes me nervous. You know? Plus being out here with no clue what all they offer makes me feel like he is all in control of the situation. So it just makes me slightly tense.” Lena stretches out in the king size bed and starts to unwind.
Marylea props herself up on her elbows and looks at her friend who is slowly fading fast to Dreamland. “I’ll sign you up for some dance classes. I know it has been a while since we did one but we can try one out. Oh and don’t forget about the photo shoot I sat up with my friend.” She waits for a reply but sees her friend fast asleep with her cell phone in her hand. She takes the phone out of her friend’s hand and sees that she hadn’t even hit send on the message to Chris.
“Lena?” With no reply from Lena, Marylea decides to give Lena another little push in the right direction of happiness. She adds a few more lines to the text and hits send then, covers Lena and herself up with a blanket. Just like old times. She thought to herself, she has missed her friend and these moments that have helped them bond and grow. God please let them work out, I need her out here permanently. It’s been forever since she talked to God but figured at this point she could use all the help she can get.
***************************************************************************************************************************************************
Chris wakes up at his usual time thanks to Dodger, he loves that dog and his ability to wake up at the same time every day no matter where they are. He lets Dodger out and does some stretches. While his cup of tea is brewing he looks at his phone and catches up on the news and gossip. When he glances at his messages he has a few from friends but one from an unknown number, before blocking the number he decides to read the message.
Thanks for lunch yesterday. Hope to see you again today. 💋
Seeing this message makes him smile a bit. Glad to know that he can still connect to females. He wants her to not only have a good time in California but wants her to enjoy her time with him. He knows it’s only been a day but he likes talking to her. It’s been so long since he has met someone so real and honest that it makes him want to keep her smiling and laughing. He sends her a quick reply then makes a quick call.
“Hey Marylea. Did I wake you?”
A sleepy Marylea answers on the first ring, “Hello? Chris? It’s not even 7am. What do you need?”
“Umm yeah everything is ok for the most part. I just wanted some intel on Lena. Like you know what kind of breakfast she might like or favorite flowers.”
The questions that were asked didn’t fully take Marylea by surprise. She was right when she told Lena Chris liked her. It’s good to see that he is moving so quick to make things go smoothly with her. “Do you like my best friend?”
A small pause happens because he isn’t fully sure how to answer the question. “I think she is a great girl so far. I might like her. I just want to know she likes me back.”
“Interesting… well for breakfast I already got her favorite bagels and cream cheese. But she does love daisies, so if you surprised her with those she would be ok. But you should look at some of her social media to get a better idea of what she likes and I don’t know continue to talk to her to get to know her.”
Chris chuckles at Marylea’s last comment. “I know. I talked to her a lot last night but, I just wanted to have my best foot forward and show her I think she’s pretty awesome. But anyways I’ll let you go. Is she still asleep?”
Marylea looks back at the king size bed to her bestie knocked out still. She doesn’t think she has gotten much sleep or at least a night without interruption since being the only one there for Eevee. “Yeah she is still a sleep. But Chris one more thing before you go.”
“What’s that?”
“If you hurt her, make her cry, or do anything other than make her smile I will promise to end you. She is my best friend and deserves only the best and that was why I volunteered her to escort you to a few gigs. Don’t lead her on, she doesn’t deserve that. Understand?”
“Loud and clear. I just want a friend or maybe more.”
“Ok. Good now I’ve gotta get finished dressing for work. I guess I’ll see you later.” She says cheerfully after changing her tone, “And one more thing. Hello Kitty.”
“Hello Kitty?”
“She adores anything and everything Hello Kitty. The rest of her obsession or ‘hobbies’ as she calls them you will have to figure them out. Buh bye.”
“Bye and thanks so much.”
Click.
With that Chris started googling flower shops that had daisies and starts looking at how to make today a great day for them both.
***************************************************************************************************************************************************
Marylea knew she shouldn’t threatened him but at the same point she didn’t really care. Lena was honestly like the only real family she has even if they aren’t blood. She knows if it was the other way around Lena would have said that and more. But on a positive note Chris has a crush on her. She smiles and does a little happy dance as she grabs her keys and heads for the door.
“Marylea? Are you leaving?” Lena groggily asks as she lifts herself up from the comfortable bed.
“Yeah, I’m heading out. Bagels are in the fridge. Tylenol on the nightstand just is case you are hungover.”
“Aren’t you?”
“A little bit but I can get through it. I’ve gotta go but, have fun with Chris today.”
“Ugh! You had to remind me of that. I just wanna sleep.”
“Nope, you already agreed to today. Maybe it will be an easy day but in a few days you have a photo shoot to do for Andre.” Marylea saw Lena’s eyes open up more when mentioning a photo shoot that she hadn’t told her about yet. With that pause she took that as a sign to leave. “We can discuss that tonight over dinner. Love you mean it.”
Lena falls back into bed and sighs. What have I gotten myself into? She then looks over to her phone:
Had a great time also. Text me when you wake up. Got some fun plans today. :)
Seeing that text made her smile a little bit. She can’t remember she woke up to a text from someone, probably not since her and Ezra were dating years ago. It was a small message but the act still made her smile. She won’t admit to anyone including herself that she might have a small crush on him. Part of her feels like admitting that means she doesn’t love Ezra anymore which isn’t the case but she knows he can’t come back. 301 days. She is hoping that as time goes on it will be better.
It’s only 7am she calls her parents to check up on Eevee while making herself breakfast. Her parents let her know that Eevee was doing just fine. She decides to shoot Chris a quick message and let him know that she would be ready in the next hour or so.
With that she takes two Tylenols then heads to the shower. She realizes that she forgot to ask him how to dress so she figures jean shorts and a white tank top would work. She decides since her hair is still straight she would do her hair in space balls.
She hears the doorbell ring and looks at the clock. Wow he wasn’t joking about wanting to see me. Opening the door she is greeted with a huge bouquet of daisies.
“Oh my! These are beautiful. How did you know these are my favorite?”
“A little bird told me.”
“Would this birdy happen to be my bestie?” She asked giving him a curious look with one eyebrow raised.
“I can neither confirm nor deny. . .”
“Fine be difficult. So what are the plans for the day?”
“Well I was thinking of going to a café.”
“A café?” She asks with a questioning look.
“You don’t like the idea?”
“Didn’t say that just hoping our full day won’t be spent at a café.”
“Ohh no never. I figured it would be a good way to start the day, then maybe hit a few shops up to find you something for the charity dinner.”
Charity dinner. Thinking of what is to come slightly makes her uncomfortable but, she knows she needs to do this. What’s the worse that can happen in all honesty? You have a great time, meet new people, have fun experiences, and maybe fall in love. LOVE. That seems slightly foreign to her. It has been 301 days since she has been in love. Maybe it has been enough time to at least play with the idea of finding a new love. She has hated going to sleep alone and waking up alone. “OK let’s go!”
The two get in Chris’ car and head down the interstate. Lena enjoys the warm breeze as they are cruising through the city. Chris admire her from the side as she is quietly taking in her new surroundings. He can’t help but think she is beautiful. She doesn’t wear any makeup minus some chap stick but still manages to look amazing.
They finally arrived to a large bright pink RV as soon as they see it Lena’s eyes grow wide and she squeaks out, “Hello Kitty Café!? Oh. My God! I’ve always want to go to it but they never come to West Virginia or anywhere near me.” Lena hasn’t been this excited about anything for her in a while. “This is sooo amazing.”
“You are really excited about this. Aren’t you?” He replies with a chuckle as he puts the car in park. She’s out of the car before he shuts his door, she standing there bouncing up and down looking giddy with happiness. With out thinking he grabs her hand as the go to stand in line with the other patrons. Her body tensed at first when he grabbed her hand but he stroke her hand with his thumb and she quickly relaxed.
“I’m super excited! This is like totally awesome!” She gets slightly distracted by the menu of things to get.
In no time they are in the front of the line, Lena still hadn’t figured out what she wanted so Chris figured he would surprise her even more. “Good morning ladies, I called ahead and I believe you put stuff aside for me and my lovely date.” Hearing the label of ‘date’ made Lena blush slightly.
“Ohhhh it really is you! And yes, we put one of everything to the side like you asked. Can we have your autograph pretty please?” The perky clerk asked as she had another girl run to get the bag full of goodies. Chris nods as the girl and few others run over to him to get his picture. Lena politely walked off to the side so they could get his picture. “Can we have a picture of you and him together? You guys look so cute together. Plus you guys are matching.”
Shocked by the fact neither had looked at the other’s clothes they realized they did in fact match. Both wore white tank tops and jean shirts with Converse, hers were Hello Kitty and his were solid black. They both had sunglasses on, the main difference was she didn’t have a hat on unlike him who is sporting his favorite NASA hat.
“Sure why not.” Lena shocked herself with how easily she replied at being ok with being photographed with him. I guess I need to start getting use to it. Chris pulls Lena closer to him and puts his arm around her waist while her hand lays on his chest.
“Awww you guys look so cute! What’s your name? How long have you guys been going out?”
Lena looks at Chris nervously praying that he will take the lead and answer questions. She isn’t sure what to say other than the truth so she hopes that when he answers it will set the tone of how things will always be for them.
“This is Evangeline, and we this is our first official date. We just met through friends yesterday. Hate to cut this short, but I want to give her a great first date.” With that Chris grabs her hand once more as they head back to the car with four bags packed full of Hello Kitty merchandise.
Beaming Lena gives him a bright smile as she pulls the plush Hello Kitty from the bag. “That was awesome! Thank you so much for this all! I can’t believe you got me one of everything.”
“Well I looked at your Instagram and was trying to figure out what you did have but I figured this was easier. Are you happy with it?”
“Most def am I happy about it all! Like look how cute this is”. She shows him the bow shaped water bottle and squeals. “So where to now? If there is a place that can really top of this awesomeness.”
Chris chuckles and places his hand on her knee and gives it gentle squeeze. “This probably won’t be as awesome as the Hello Kitty cafe but it’s still pretty good.”
Silently Lena gives him a confused look because she was curious as to what their next adventure would entail. They pulled up to a small bright blue building no words were on the building just large glass windows with mannequins with beautiful gowns on them. “Where are we?” She asks as he opens the door for her.
“CHRISTOPHER!” A small lady who resembles Edna from the Incredibles comes speed walking up to them with open arms.
“Edna!” Chris greets her with the same warmth that she gives him. “How are you?”
“Ohh I’m good. Same ole’ same ole’. You know how it is.” Edna stops when she realizes there is someone else with him. “And WHO is this lovely lady?” Edna takes a good look at the brown eye beauty.
Chris snakes his arm around Lena’s waist causing her to blush slightly. “This is Lena. We need a dress for tomorrow night. Nothing to flashy but something . . ..” He trails off then looks down at Lena trying to sum up how he wants he to look. “Beautiful.”
Edna watches how the pair enacts with each other. She isn’t sure if they are dating or not but they will be soon. Generally, when Chris has a lady to take with to events they are family and the ones who aren’t have their own designer they would want rather than Edna. Interesting. “Well hello. What is your style? Favorite color? Are you opposed to heels?”
“Hi.” Lena says going to shake hands but Edna give her a hug with the same warmth she gave Chris. “I’m not a glamour girl by any means. I’m a mom. So I guess boring girl next door. I’m ok with a basic black gown, but not heels.”
“I’d venture to say that you aren’t boring on any level.” Edna says while Chris slyly nods his head. “But here try this black gown on.” Edna hands Lena a long black plunging v-neckline and draped-knot waisted gown. While Lena takes the gown and go to the dressing room; Edna goes into the back thinking she has the perfect dress for Lena.
Lena looks at herself in the gown before stepping out. Wow I look basic and boring, but this is me now. I guess. “What do you guys think? It’s a little loose but it works.”
Chris and Edna look at each other giving each other the same look. Chris knows how blunt Edna is so he opens his mouth to say something but Edna beats him to it. “I don’t like it on you.”
“Excuse me?”
“I. Do. Not. Like. This. On. You.”
Lena looks at herself in the huge mirror. “Why not? You made this; I thought I looked ok.”
Chris intervenes before Edna would open her mouth again and possibly hurting Lena’s feelings. “What she means is that it doesn’t flatter your figure.”
She looks slightly defeated. “Well what should I wear then?” Tears threaten to fall down her face. She refused to let them see her cry.
He could see the difference in her body language. He hurt her. “It’s ok. We will find something better.” He grabs her hand and gives it a gentle squeeze.
Edna watches them interact and realizes that she was a little bit too blunt with her reply. “I didn’t mean to say I don’t like it on you, just that it doesn’t look like it is truly your character deep down. Come sit.” Lena joins Edna on the velvet blue couch, seeing that they are about to have a moment he walks outside to return some phone calls he has missed. “Lets just be bluntly honest right now. You don’t like it very much either.”
Lena looks down cocking her her head to the side. “It’s not that I don’t like it. . . I just feel like I’m not really Hollywood material. I don’t know what he or anyone wants of me.”
“Have you met Chris? He isn’t Hollywood on any level.”
“I know but ...”
“No buts. He likes you. A lot. He might not have told you yet but he does. You are beautiful and a mom but you can do both. Trust me with your dress ok?”
“Ok. I’m going to trust, but what do you have in mind?”
“This. Now go try it on before he comes back. I want you to just be yourself and more importantly, love yourself.”
********************************************
“So let me get this straight. You didn’t want to take a family member to the charity dinner so you asked Jeff to find you someone. And now you are now ‘dating’ a random girl.” Scott says.
Chris runs his hands through his hair. “Wow you make me sound like a desperate asshole.”
“You said it not me.”
“Look it’s not like that, well not entirely. She was volunteered by Jeff’s assistant and I like spending time with her so far. I’d like to date her maybe. But...”
Scott cuts his brother off. “But what?”
“I don’t know if she likes me. Like she has been through some stuff. I don’t want to pressure her, even if I feel we would be great together.”
“Welp brother of mine. Give it time and do baby steps. I mean if she let you hold her hand and such I think she is on board. Just baby steps.”
“Gotcha. Well I’m going to go inside and see what Edna has her in maybe something to really show her body off more.”
There was a pause. “You left her with Edna?”
“Yeah why?”
“Nothing just go back to see what she has her in.”
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Practice Challenge {pt. 2}
Read PART 1
Part 2
An hour after I had heard the news, I was driving through the streets of downtown Lauderdale.
My hands were clutched tightly to the wheel as I turned into the library on the west side of town. This library, once surrounded by overgrown grass and falling apart at the edges, was now the nicest building on this side of town.
It had a parking lot, even though most of the people and children who used it didn’t own cars. It was made of bricks, some discolored from the repairs done in the past year.
On the pathway leading up, there were cute little signs with frogs and bunnies that said sayings like “reading is FUN!” and “Reading takes you on adventures!”
I parked the car, taking the keys out of the ignition and walked up the path to the door. In the entrance of the library, there was a little foyer with more posters and signs with positive sayings and quotes.
To the left, there was a pinboard displaying different activities and demonstrations they were holding. I walked down the hallway, heading into the main room, and looked around. I spun slowly, gazing up at the Illéa approved books that lined the shelves.
In the corner of the room, there was a line of new computers.
I thought back to my childhood when this little building was a refuge for all of the other homeless kids I ran around with. We were all in the lower castes, and this library was open to the public, specifically the lower castes. Now, there were almost triple the books they had back then. There also used to be only one old computer.
And when I finally took control of it over some kid was playing an online game that took forever, it was where I edited my first short film at the age of thirteen. The short film that changed my life.
I was spooked by a voice, “Oh! Indie!”
Meredith, the 70-year-old something woman who had been running the library as a volunteer for as long as I knew came out from her office. She was a sweet woman, who cared a lot about education and creativity and making the world a better place. I really liked Meredith.
“Hi Meredith,” I said, smiling in her direction.
“I can’t believe it! I really can’t believe it, Indie! You’re one of the Selected!”
I giggled, watching her get all excited.
“I know, I really can’t believe it either.”
I looked down, sudden feeling… embarrassed, overwhelmed, unworthy?
“Oh, sweetie, you will be great. The prince is going to love you! I just know it!”
I chuckled softly at her optimism.
“Just to think,” Meredith continued. “Almost ten years ago you were hanging out here, trying to run complex editing software on that old dinosaur of a computer, and now you are about to head off to the palace!”
I looked around at the place, smiling contently. “It is amazing, isn’t it?”
“You deserve it, sweetie.”
“Thanks,” I responded, though I wasn’t sure if I believed her. “I just wanted to come by, and ask if you and the library will be alright while I’m on gone. If there’s anything you need before I go, let me know, and I’ll make sure it gets done. I’m not sure how much communication I’ll have access to while I’m there.”
“Oh, honey, you’ve already done enough. Look at this place! Look at everything you’ve already done to make it better!” she said, gesturing around at the room.
“I just want to make sure,” I said, smiling kindly.
“Well, the only thing I can think of is that we’ll have to postpone the camera seminar that you were supposed to teach. That’s no problem though! I’d teach it myself, but you know I don’t know how to work technology to save my life.”
“Maybe I can see if I can get one of my friends from Angeles to fly in and teach it. I know a lot of the kids were looking forward to it.”
“Oh, don’t worry about that. I’m sure you are going to be busy in the next few days.”
“It’s the least I can do.”
“Really, sweetie, I want you to focus on yourself. This is a big opportunity. If anyone could be our future princess, I’d want it to be you.”
I sighed, grabbing Meredith’s hands in thanks.
“Well, then,” I said. “If you do need anything… repairs, books, lunch for the kids... put in on my tab.”
Meredith smiled, pulling me in for a hug that I reciprocated. “We will be fine. Have a great time, kiddo.”
I smiled, stepping back and looking around the room again. Finally, I waved goodbye and headed back out to my car, so I could go home and get ready for my life to change. Again.
---
I arrived to the airport early. It was a habit, really. Engrained in me from day one on my film internship when I was younger: Being early is being on time. And being on time shows that you care.
The plane was much like one I had flown in several times. Private planes were always rented out by the studios when we had to travel cross country for a shoot, so it was nothing new.
The leather seats, however, were surprisingly soft, and I placed my carry on bag in one of the overhead bins.
I knew there were supposed to be three other girls joining me for the flight. They were all from different provinces and were also selected. I had done minimal research on each of the girls, not because I didn’t want to know, but because I didn’t want to psych myself out.
When I researched something, I researched it intensely. I wrote notes all over, I made webs, I scribbled one-liners-- another habit I had developed from filmmaking. So, instead, I opted for just looking at their names and faces and provinces. Though, there were too many to remember for now.
My leg shook as I waited for the others to arrive. Suddenly, I was regretting my no-research strategy. I was going in blind, and I had no idea if I would even get along with any of these girls. What if they thought I was pretentious because I am two? What if they hate my movies?
Not a real concern, but I had seen some nasty haters before.
Just then, a girl walked onto the plane. Her golden hair made her shine in the sunlight, and she smiled brightly.
“Hi! I’m Evalin!” she said, walking further onto the plane.
I smiled back, happy that so far, Evalin seemed very kind. “Hi Evalin! I’m Indie.”
She sat down in the chair across the aisle from me, and turned so she was facing me.
“It’s nice to meet you!” she said. “You’re from Clermont, right?”
Clearly, Evalin was more researched than I was. I only had to remember three other girls and their provinces for this plane ride and was already drawing a blank. I suddenly felt dumb.
“Yes! I am... and you're from... remind me again?” I responded, smiling sheepishly.
Evalin, cool as ever while smoothing out her skirt said, “Carolina. You’re a movie director, right?”
So, she knew me knew me.
I tried to give a kind smile, hoping to come off as humble but I worried about failing. “I am. What is your profession?”
“I’m still in college, but I’m studying biology.”
College. I thought that was pretty cool. It had always seemed like an interesting path, but by the time I graduated high school, I was already in the film industry and no one thought I needed to pursue a degree. I guess they were right because a year later, I was nominated for an Illéan Oscar Award.
“Oh wow,” I said. “That's really cool. I could never do science.”
It was true, science was a nightmare in school. That, and math.
“Thanks! It’s second nature for me, really. I grew up around it,” she said, smiling sheepishly. “I think it’s really cool what you do, though! I’ve never had that kind of artistic vision!”
Evalin, though going into a field much different than mine, was clearly just as passionate as I was. She was sweet, and I was really liking her so far. I hoped that she liked me too.
“Aw, thank you. It's the only thing I could ever do, and I'm glad. I truly love it. The profession saved me in a way.”
Another truth. Without film, I would be nothing.
“That’s amazing!! That kind of passion is very admirable!”
I grinned, feeling great and confident now that I had one good interaction under the belt. Besides, this type of conversation I was used to. The film industry was all about networking after all. And passion pays off. It’s easy to talk about one’s passions and Evalin and I were both clearly passionate.
Suddenly, I glanced over at the digital clock on the wall of the plane. The schedule had said the plane would be leaving in a few minutes. We were still missing two girls.
“We are still waiting on two more right?” I asked. “The plane is supposed to leave soon.”
Evalin looked over her shoulder out of her window. “Looks like one is coming now!”
Just as she said that, a girl came rushing into the plane. She was distracted, glancing back over her shoulder ever few moments with a stare of curiosity.
“Sorry, sorry, my parents kept saying goodbye,” she explained, but then, she turned, smiling. “Idalia Moretti. What about you guys?”
She walked over to an empty seat and plopped down. I couldn’t help but stare at her amused. She was a chaotic force but still seemed like she was excited and nervous. She reminded me of the interns on a film set.
Evalin responded first. “Evalin Berg. It’s nice to meet you!”
I responded right after. “Hi! I'm Indie!”
Just then, the last girl entered. Her name, I actually remembered. Shala Lie. She had headphones in and stared at the ground, ignoring all of us. She sat far away, and stared at the window. We all watched for a second, before turning back to one another.
“Are you guys excited?” I asked, grinning.
“Very! A little nervous too, though. What about you?” Evalin said.
Idalia then added, “It should be an interesting day. Tomorrow is when I’ll be nervous. Or... I guess whenever we meet the prince.”
I nodded, agreeing with both of them.
“I'm definitely a little bit of both excited and nervous. But, you're right. Tomorrow is when things get really real.”
“True. Today is just makeovers and getting settled in, right?” Evalin commented, wincing slightly as if she was embarrassed she didn’t know. “Sorry, this whole thing has been a bit of a whirlwind. It’s kind of hard to keep track of all the details.”
She didn’t need to feel bad. The only reason I knew is because I had studied the schedule like a call sheet.
“Yeah, I think so,” I supplied. “I'm sure there will be people telling us what to do, and where to go. I wouldn't worry too much.”
In a way, I realized that this Selection wouldn’t be all that different from a film set. There would almost always be a plan, a place for us to go, expectations to be met, and a hierarchy to listen to.
“It’s kind of weird, being thrown into the spotlight like this!” Evalin pointed out. “Do any of you know any of the other girls? I’ve only gotten tidbits of information that my sister has dug up.”
I did know one of the girls. Emily Rose White. She had acted in a couple of my movies. She was really sweet, and I wondered when I would see her when we got to Angeles.
“Yeah, I just know the details because I have a friend obsessed with this stuff. She sent me a PowerPoint of ‘the most important things to know’ on everything and everyone,” Idalia said.
“I know one of the girls, Emily. She's acted in a few of my movies. And I know some of the other actors just from the industry talk and stuff,” I admitted. “A Powerpoint? That's iconic.”
It was. I found it highly amusing, and I couldn’t help but smirk at the idea.
“Oh wow!” Evalin responded, laughing nervously. “Dare I ask what it said about us?”
“Oh, Evalin... never read the reviews,” I joked, chuckling softly.
Though, I’m not sure Evalin understood I was joking because her face flushed, and she laughed nervously as she said, “Ah sorry! I’m used to my work being peer-reviewed.”
Idalia laughed slightly at the interaction before stepping in and looking at me. “She is iconic like that. She liked your last by the way. It was in her PowerPoint.”
“Oh, really? That's sweet!” I responded. Though, it was probably hypocritical considering the joke I just told.
It was just nice to know that people didn’t hate my movies.
“I’m pretty sure your slide just said, ‘bio smart but I have no idea what any of her work says,’” Idalia continued, looking at Evalin.
Evalin blushed even more. “Ah, I haven’t really done anything of note. I held a research position under my genetics professor last semester, but it was mostly just me using a microscope.”
That sounded so cool, I thought. So important. Evalin must be really smart.
“That sounds way more intelligent than anything I've done so... kudos to you,” I applauded her.
She was so shy about her work. I wanted her to know she should be proud of it.
“What movies have you directed?” she asked, suddenly turning the conversation around to me.
I blanked for a moment, feeling like a fool, who forgot her own movies.
My brain came back, and I was left listing off a few of my works. “Uh... a few. Some of them you might know are Lady Bird and Little Women. I've also done The Greatest Showman. But, I also direct episodes of TV series sometimes.”
Evalin’s face lit up. “Oh, I loved Little Women! That and Pride and Prejudice are the two movies my sister insists we watch whenever we have a family movie night!”
My heart warmed. To think, my movie, was being played next to the Pride and Prejudice.
I grinned, responding, “Pride and Prejudice is amazing. I'm glad my movie sits along beside it at your family movie nights.”
Idalia returned to the conversation with, “Funny. My house is usually filled with suggestions of Megamind on family night.”
I also gasped out loud, laughing, but I contained it with an amused smiling, responding sarcastically. “Hey, I mean, Megamind... important stuff.”
Evalin asked, “Do you have a lot of siblings, too?”
I replied easily, “No, actually. I don't have any siblings. You?”
I looked to both Evalin and Idalia.
With an amused smile, Idalia said, “I only have a younger brother but Megamind is usually not his idea.”
I laughed, responding the again sarcastically, “Like I said, Megamind... important stuff.”
“I probably tease him more than he teases me,” Idalia said.
I chuckled again along with Evalin, who said, “I have 3 brothers and a sister. Megamind is a classic.”
Megamind… Megamind was something for sure. I hadn’t seen it in forever, and it was probably on once.
Instead, I thought more about her four siblings. I couldn’t imagine having even one sibling, let alone four.
“A big family! That must be nice,” I said.
“It is, for the most part, but we can get a little antsy,” Evalin explained. “There’s plenty of teasing and pranks to go around! Having time to yourself must be nice, though!”
I smiled again.
“Can be. But, at least I get to live vicariously through my characters,” I added whimsically. “Oh, hey, Idalia, we never asked what your profession was. You seem like a prankster, it has to be something interesting.”
She grinned, leaning back in her seat. “Interesting assumption. I fence sabre. Or saber if you want.”
Fencing? Also very cool.
Evalin must’ve also thought it was cool because her eyes lit up and she and Idalia went back and forth for a little.
“Oh wow, that’s awesome! I thought your name sounded kind of familiar! You fenced in the Olympics, right? My youngest brother had the games on 24/7 when they were being broadcasted!” Evalin said.
At the mention of the Olympics, Idalia brightened. “I did. I’m going again next year. Or at least that’s the plan.”
“Ah, congratulations!” Evalin exclaimed, but then bit her lip nervously. “Are you nervous about the possibility of this selection taking over a year? I know the officials said it shouldn’t, since it should display the Prince’s decisiveness, but I have to wonder how into the Selection he’s going to be, what with his engagement to Evie Waldia being cut off so recently.”
Idalia takes a moment to take that in a looks up at the ceiling, “Time will tell. But I doubt they will say I can’t go. Illéa, like everyone else, sends people that can win. If I‘m still one of the candidates when the time comes, it would be foolish of them to deny my participation.”
So, she was confident then. I didn’t mind that. In fact, I sort of admired it. But, too much confidence can get you into bad places, from what I had seen in the film industry at least. I silently hoped she would be careful.
“That’s true,” Evalin said with a sigh. “It must be so cool, being able to compete for your country like that!”
Finally, I chipped into the conversation. “That really is cool, Idalia. I'm sure you'll get to go. It's probably even better press for Illéa if they send a Selected.”
Evalin nodded, agreeing with me. “That’s a good point! You’d get to be serving the nation in two ways at once!”
Idalia chucked. “I guess that could be said. So we got a film director, bio major, fencer and…,” she trailed off, looking over at Shala. “An unknown.”
Shala was still looking out the window.
I leaned in closer to Evalin and Idalia while looking over at Shala with a slide glance. “Should...should we try to talk to her...or?”
“Shala?” Evalin tried to call out to her. When Shala didn’t respond, Evalin frowned and turned back around. “Maybe she’s just very nervous.”
“Yeah, probably...”
More time passed, and we continued to talking to each other for the whole trip.
I shrugged. “Well, anyway, you girls seem really nice. It's definitely made me feel a lot better about this whole process.”
I truly was happy that this entire conversation had gone well so far. I had no idea if the girls would be at each other’s throats, but these two, Evalin and Idalia, seemed really sweet.
“Likewise,” Evalin responded, smiling. “It’s good to know that we’re not in this alone.”
I nodded and Idalia said, “I’m sure Prince Arin must be having a similar feeling.”
I nodded again, and then grinned, leaning forward.
“Speaking of Prince Arin... thoughts?”
Evalin blushed, “Well, he is quite handsome, don’t you think?”
I smiled, sitting back in my seat.
“He is quite handsome,” I agreed. “I'm excited to get to know him. Or, at least I hope I get a chance to know him.”
Evalin nodded, “Me too. I’d love to be able to talk to him and get to know him. I’m sure he has lots of interesting stories to tell.”
“Yeah probably. It's just crazy that we are going to be living in the palace of all places,” I said excitedly. “Hanging out with the Prince of all people. Feels like a fever dream.”
Honestly, I felt like I was living in a fairytale. But, then again, I had felt like that for a long time.
“Truly! I never imagined that this is where life would actually take me!” Evalin said, looking out the window. “It looks like we’re about to land!”
I nodded, looking out my own window. We were just barely starting to descend. The city of Angeles glimmered below, a city I was familiar with. A city I lived in most of the time. I had missed it, and it definitely would be weird to not head back to my house, but instead, to the palace.
“Yep. We should keep in touch down there. I think it'll be nice to have some friendly faces around,” I added, trying to come off as genuine.
Because I was, I just wanted to make sure they knew I was.
“Certainly!” both Evalin and Idalia agreed.
We continued to talk as the plane descended, speaking mostly about room arrangements. I was sad to find out that Idalia and Evalin were in the same hall, and I was in another, but I tried to stay positive. That would just mean a better chance of getting to know more people.
“I’ve heard there’s a woman’s room. And also the etiquette lessons,” Idalia said, as we talked about how we would see each other around.
“True! I’m kind of excited for the etiquette lessons. It’ll be nice to learn something different,” Evalin explained.
“Oh it’ll be something for sure,” Idalia responded, clearly amused. “How to be photographed, how to curtsy! Maybe which spoon is for the salad as well.”
I laughed a little, but warned, “Trust me, that’s not the hard stuff. It’s the learning to talk to the press that’s hard.”
That, I definitely knew. After all, I had been given etiquette lessons before-- right after my short film had taken off and I got sponsored to go to a school for threes. And then, my film career had taken off, and I had to learn how to do interviews and walk red carpets and how to be a proper two.
It was exhausting, but I was thankful for it.
“I wonder if they’ll make us learn how to walk with books balanced on our heads,” Evalin added.
I laughed, picturing it in my head. Evalin and Idalia were pretty funny.
“That would be funny to see,” I said.
Not long after that, the plane landed. We were escorted off, and into a limousine. We didn’t talk much during the ride, each of excited and nervous about what lay ahead of us.
As for me, I was happy to be back in Angeles and ready to try my chance at change and love.
[mentions: @evalinkatrineberg , @idaliamoretti , @emily-rose-white ]
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The Magician and I- (1)
| 1 | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 | 6 | 7 | 8 | 9 | 10 | 11 | 12 | 13 |
Pairing:
Yoongi/Reader
Summary:
Suga is a wish-granting magician. He grants wishes—for the price of your most prized possession.
Your parents and brother died tragically in a plane crash and you visit Suga to grant your wish to bring them back to life...but instead you become his assistant.
Now you’re thrust into a world of magic and the mysterious being known as Suga.
Tags:
Fantasy, romance, comedy, a bit of a slow burn, angst
Warnings:
Mentions of death, strong language
CHAPTER 1: WHO IS SUGA?
You knew instantly you were in a dream.
Strange, you thought, I never have such vivid dreams.
You looked around you and recognized that you were in your home—the home you lived before the accident. It was unchanged, and you were marveled at how your mind remembered every detail.
“Y/N!”
You turned around and was met with the vision of your mother.
“Mom!” You cried as you ran up to her and gave her a tight hug.
She chuckled, “Oh my, what’s gotten you this excited?”
You could barely speak as you sobbed quietly against her shoulder. She felt so soft and warm, like she really was alive and here in your arms. It was so vivid you can even smell her familiar scent, which made you choke.
“There, there.” She rubbed your back, trying to soothe you, “I’m here.”
You reluctantly step away so that you can see her face again, “Mom, are you really here?”
She gave you a warm smile, “Of course, darling.”
“Then I wish I never wake up.” You said honestly and she brought up her hand to stroke your cheek.
“You are so strong, know that I’m always proud of you.”
This made you cry.
“Please don’t cry, honey, I have something I need to tell you.”
You felt the world start to shift around you and you scrambled to grip unto this dream.
“No wait, Mom, tell me!”
Her face became more blurry as her voice seem to be muffled, like your head was underwater.
“Go find the magician, Suga.”
“What?”
“Suga, he will help you.”
You reached out for her but you just grabbed at air, “No! Mom, don’t leave!”
“Go and ask for a wish. He…and you…”
“And what? Mom what are you talking about?” You asked, panicked, but you couldn’t hear her now and everything was spinning.
“MOM!” You cried as your eyes flew open, tears running down your cheeks.
It took a moment for you to orient yourself as you wiped the tears from your eyes.
About three months had passed since the accident, but it was still a fresh wound for you. You look around at the unfamiliar room, so different from the room you were used to for the last twenty years.
It unnerved you to have such a vivid dream, you still could feel her lingering touch where she stroked your cheek.
You then remembered what she said to you and you were puzzled by the message.
Who is Suga?
“Maybe he’s a long lost relative or something.” Your best friend, Hyelin, said and you shook your head.
“I doubt that’s what it is.”
“What did your mom meant that he’s a magician? Like the one-that-pulls-rabbits-from-hats kind of magician? They are all con artists, you know.”, She looked thoughtful as she took a sip from her coffee.
You rubbed your temples, “I don’t know. All I know is that I’ve been having that same dream for a month now and it’s kind of freaky.”
“Do you think it’s a sign? From your mother?”
“Probably not.” You answered, “Maybe my mind is making up things because I miss them so much.”
Hyelin’s smile dropped, “Right, I can’t even imagine what you’re going through. I’m sorry for bringing her up.”
You smile sadly, “It’s fine, you didn’t brought her up, I did by mentioning the stupid dream. I just…it just feels weird…without them…you know? I keep waking up, expecting to smell my mom’s cooking. I keep thinking that I’m going to hear my father’s voice asking to come take our daily walk or that each knock at my door is my annoying brother coming to tease me. There’s just so much I took for granted with them, and in one moment it’s all…gone.”
There was a pause and you realize you made the conversation awkward.
“I’m sorry, Hyelin, this was supposed to be a fun meeting to cheer me up and here I am, bringing the mood down.”
“It’s fine, y/n, you don’t have to appear strong all the time.”
“Thanks, Hyelin.” You smiled and squeezed her hand, “I don’t know how I would have gotten through these months without you.”
“What kind of friend will I be if I didn’t? Now enough with the somber mood, you’re right, today was supposed to cheer you up. As your good friend it is my obligation to distract you at least for a little bit.”
You laughed, “Yeah, it’s just this dream. It just puts me in a strange mood.”
“What you need is closure.” Hyelin said and took out her laptop, “Your mind will probably not let it go until you find out the truth.”
“The truth about what?”
“Is Suga a real person? Is he or she really a magician? And finally, can they really grant your wish?”
“Hyelin, you can’t possibility think that the dreams were message that held some truth in it?”
Deep inside though, you wished it was true because then you could make the wish that can make your life right again.
“Listen, y/n,” Hyelin said as she typed on her laptop, “there’s only one way to find out: by googling his name.”
You rolled your eyes, “It can’t be that easy.”
“Never underestimate google.” Hyelin said solemnly, “Now how do you think it’s spelled?”
You gave her an incredulous look, “How am I supposed to know?”
“Fine we will go with S-U-G-A. ‘Suga…magician’.” She typed as she said those two words.
You huffed, “You’re probably going to get a sugar daddy magician or something like that.”
Hyelin laughed, “Don’t be a hater, y/n—oh wait, this looks promising!”
Curious, you peered over her shoulder and snorted.
“Wow this website is so obviously old.”
“Stop it,” Hyelin chastised, “look, it says ‘Have a wish that needs to be granted? Visit Suga, the wish-granting magician.”
“Hyelin, this is written in comic sans, how much can you trust this website? This interfacing and graphics are making my eyes bleed.”
“Ok, but how much of coincidence is this? You get a dream for a month about a magician called Suga that grants wishes and he actually exists.”
“Uh, correction: he claims to be a magician that can magically grant wishes. Do you not see anything shady about this?”
You just couldn’t believe your friend was actually believing this bullshit website. Not to mention you are kind of peeved that the website doesn’t seem to have been updated since 2001.
“Oh my god, this gets even better.” Hyelin said, obviously not listening to you, “the address they give here is right here in Seoul! Y/N, this is obviously destiny.”
“Let me see.” Sure enough, not only the address was in Seoul, it was like a 10 minute walk from your apartment. “Wow, that’s freaky.”
“Or…fate. You have to at least check it out, y/n.”
You sighed, knowing Hyelin is persistent and won’t let this go. Plus, you were just a tiny bit curious and wanted to check this Suga out.
“Fine, I’ll go on my way home. Do you want to join me?”
“Of course!” Hyelin said excitedly, “How often do you get to meet a magician who can grant wishes?”
You decided not to not break her bubble and looked back at the screen so you can take note of the address properly. You then noticed fine print in the bottom of the screen and squinted.
“ ‘The price for a wish is your most prized possession, so be warned’—what the heck?”
“Where does it say that?”
“There”, You pointed at the screen and she squinted.
“Wow, your eyesight is good, I probably wouldn’t have caught that. It also doesn’t help that it’s yellow text on a white background…”
“Hyelin, do not realize what that means? My prized possession?That is some serious bullshit.”
“Okay, but what is it?”
“What?”
“Your prized possession?”
You furrowed your eyebrows, “I don’t know, I used to be so sure…but I lost it.”
“Wha—oh.” Her face fell, “Well it’s not like you’re going to make a wish anyway, right?”
Right, you were just going to check out if Suga is legit or not and why your mom sent you to him in a dream.
“Right.” You said, but were not so convinced.
“Plus I thought you thought it was bogus anyway.” Hyelin teased you and you laughed.
“Okay, okay, I get it. Let’s go and check this Suga out.”
Why does his name have to be so ridiculous?, you thought, it’s probably not even his real name.
“Alright lemme just pack up my laptop.”
You nodded as you finished your iced coffee. Hyelin’s phone dinged and she looked at her phone.
“Oh my god, I forgot!” She exclaimed as she started to text furiously.
“What happened?”
“My dad is back from his business trip today! We are supposed to meet him in the airport in half an hour.” She looked at you and bit her lip, conflicted.
“Hyelin, it’s fine—go to your father. I know how much you miss him.”
“But—“
“I’ll be fine going on my own, I’ll tell you all about it.”
“Thank you so much, y/n! I’ll see you tomorrow then” We hugged goodbye as she ran out of the café.
You’re a little disappointed that you’re going by yourself, since this Suga guy could be a creep.
Thankfully your parents made you take martial arts classes as a child, so you know that if things take a turn for the worst you’re able to defend yourself pretty well. Not to mention that you developed fast reflects because of Jin, your brother; he loved sneak attacks and claimed he was “training you”. For what, you never knew.
You reached the building where Suga’s business supposedly resided and was surprised that it looked like a very nice office building instead of some mystic hole-in-the-wall shop with mood lighting.
Maybe it’s an outdated address, you thought, that website was old after all. Maybe some company bought the building, knocked it down, and erected this fancy building instead. You were about to leave when the doorman called to you.
“Hello miss, do you need anything?”
You blushed, knowing you looked very out of place, “Oh um, I was trying to find someone by the name of Suga but I think I got the wrong address—“
“We get that a lot, don’t worry. He should make it more clear. He’s on the 5th floor.”
You blinked, “Wait, this is the right address? Someone by the name of Suga has an office here?”
The doorman chuckled, “I hope you find what you’re looking for, miss.”
You gathered your thoughts together and gave him a smile, “Thank you so much for your help.”
As you walked to the elevator, you admired the prestige condition of the lobby. The floors looked recently polished, it looked so shiny you were afraid to make a mark on it. This was honestly the opposite of what you were expecting and was very nervous.
Who the heck is Suga? Is he making so much money scamming people that he can afford to have an office space in this building?
You entered the elevator and pushed the floor, trying to get yourself together. The door opened to a hallway with only one door. You walked up to the door and saw the sign “Suga, Magician. Monday to Saturday 4-10 PM”.
What unusual hours, you thought and checked the time, I should be fine since it’s 4:10 PM.
You didn’t know what to expect when you open the door, but it sure wasn’t a classy waiting room. Everything was so shiny, you were almost blinded by the opulence of it all. You went up to the window, but saw no one behind the counter.
Strange, you thought. You then noticed a bell in front of you and a sign that says, ‘Ring Once For Assistance’ in fancy script.
You rang it once and waited a moment. Nothing happened. You rang it a few more times and wondered if whoever was supposed to answer it heard it. You were about to ring it again when the door flew open, making you jump.
“What part of ‘ring once’ do you not understand?” The man in front of you said in a gruff voice, giving you a dark look.
The man was handsome, probably the most handsome man you’ve seen besides your brother. His glare didn’t mar his delicate features, his skin so beautiful and pale. His hair was a unique shade of mint that surprisingly suited him very well. He wore a slick business suit that obviously came from an expensive brand.
“If you’re finished with checking me out can you tell me what you want?”, He asked with a bored tone, making you blush.
Unlike your brother, who was always joking by how attractive he looks (he even called himself “worldwide handsome”), this man just said it in a matter-of-fact way.
“Are you Suga?”
He gave you an unamused look, “Yes, are you here to wish for something?”
You hesitated, how crazy would it be if you told him your dead mother told you in a dream to visit him? Your mom said to make a wish so maybe you should just make a wish…
“Um…”
“Follow me.” Suga simply said and walked back into the room he came from. He didn’t wait up for you and went into an office. The office has a whole wall that was just windows and showed the beautiful skyline of Seoul. You stared at it in awe as he just sat down on a seat and regarded you.
“Sit down.”
You nodded and awkwardly sat down to the nearest chair, fiddling with your hands nervously as he just studied you.
“Tell me your wish, I don’t have all day.”
Suga looked so different than your stereotypical fortune-teller or shaman. For one, he looked like a business man and didn’t speak in flowery language. He was curt to the point of it being rude. He also looks like he couldn’t care less with what you had to say, his face barely showing any emotion. His voice was gruff, like he just woke up from a nap. Still, there was a certain aura about him that makes him…not ordinary.
“You can grant me anything at all?”
“Yup, just know that the price is your most prized possession.”
Fuck it, you thought, what harm can it do to tell him what you want most?
“Can you bring back my dead parents and brother?”
There was a silence and then he replied, “I don’t know what you heard before you came here but I can’t grant wishes that mess with existence, that’s more God’s area and I don’t want to get into that mess.”
You look at him in disbelief and anger, the anger mostly at yourself for letting yourself believe him. You had a tiny spark of hope that your family can be brought back to you and it just fizzled out in smoke.
You forced yourself to not to cry, “How convenient.”
“Is there anything else instead?”
You snorted, everything else seems trivial, “What, so that you can say that you can’t do it? I can’t believe I stooped so low to ask some sham for a wish like a fucking five-year old.”
You stood up and saw that he still had that expressionless face; you hated that face and wanted to get some reaction out of him. You saw a vase next to you and pushed it, making it fall with a crash. He didn’t even flinch which made you even angrier.
“Fuck you, you’re just a fake magician, I’m outta of my mind to visit such a place.” You started to leave as you mutter, “Forget it, I hated the idea of giving up my prized possession anyway, bye.”
But you found that you couldn’t move a single step, as if you were frozen to the ground. You panicked.
“What the—“
“Wait.”
Suga lazily got up and walked up to you as you continued to struggle to move your legs. “Coming here was your decision, but I decide when you get to leave.”
“You’re doing this! Let me go, you creep!”
“I’m sorry I can’t do that, seeing how I’m a ‘fake magician’.” He smirked at you as he threw your words back at your face and you were not amused at all.
“Let me go now, if you don’t I’ll—“
“You’ll do what?” He asked, “You don’t seem to understand your situation at all. Once someone has seen my face, they have to make a wish or…”
“Or what?” You asked and he took a step closer to you.
“Or you die.”
You started to panic. Oh my god, I can’t die. He looks like he would kill me too, he’s not bullshitting. Why did my mom send me to this psycho? Oh my god I’m gonna die—
The world started to spin and before your world turned black you just saw that jerk’s emotionless face.
You woke up saw that you were on the cold floor. You remembered what happened and realized that you fainted. You looked up and saw Suga sitting again. You tried to get up but of course you couldn’t move a muscle.
Asshole.
“Let me get up.”, you said with gritted teeth.
“Will you be civilized and not break things again?”
You looked at where you dropped the vase but saw that it was repaired without a single scratch in its original place.
“Fine.” You muttered and you were able to get off the floor. You glared at him and took a seat.
“Let’s make a deal.” Suga said and you narrowed your eyes at him, suspicious.
“What do you mean by a ‘deal’?”
Do I have to sell my soul to him or something now? Just my luck.
“Since you don’t wanna make a wish or die, give me your body.”
“W-what?” You gasped out as you crossed your arms over chest defensively, “W-what do you mean by that?”
Just what kind of sick fuck is he? I shouldn’t have listened to some stupid dream—
He smirked as he stood up and walked towards you, “What I mean—“
“—d-don’t come any closer!” You exclaimed but he simply walked passed you and opened the door.
“—is that my assistant suddenly got pregnant and resigned. You are going to be working for me starting today.”
It took a moment to process what he said.
“Wait, what? Says who?”, You walked up to him and put your hands in your hips.
“Your service ends when you make your wish.” He looked at you, “Unless you have a wish in mind—besides the one you already said, of course.”
The bastard, he knew that was the only wish you really wanted. Nothing else is worth giving up your most prized possession. Plus, you’ve seen too many movies where wishes can go horrible wrong.
“I-I—“
“Well then, it’s settled.”
“Wait! I can’t work here! I’m a busy student, I have classes—“
“Just think of it as a part-time job, I don’t work mornings anyway.”
“No—!”
Suga turned to you and grabbed your chin, “You don’t think I’ll kill you?”
You looked into his cold eyes and knew he was serious. You bit your lip and tried not to cry, “Ok, fine.”
Suga let go of your chin, “Just sit behind the desk for now and greet whoever comes in—you can manage that, right?”
You grit your teeth, “Yes.”
You were cursing him out in your head as you went to sit behind the reception desk. It’s honestly your rotten luck that you know have to work under him of all people. You looked around your desk and sighed, there wasn’t even a computer! Then again, if the state of his website is any indication he’s totally technology inept. You were organizing the highlighters by color when a door opened and a smartly-dressed older man walked in. You straightened up and put on your customer service smile as he walked up to you.
“Hello, how may I help you?”
He didn’t smile at you or greet you, “Is this the magician Suga’s office?”
You forced yourself to keep the smile as you remember that asshole, “Yes it is.”
“Is he available?”
“Let me check his schedule,” you said sweetly and looked at the planner in front of you that you knew was empty, “He is available. I’ll let you in then.”
You opened the door for him and led him to the office.
Those brand of clothes are expensive, he must be rich, you thought, I wonder what he came to wish for.
Suga was sitting behind his desk when you entered the room. He greeted the man with a handshake and you gave him a dirty look behind the man’s back, which Suga ignored.
“Do you want tea?” Suga asked the man and he said yes. Suga then turned to you, “Prepare some tea for this gentleman.”
You looked at him in shock but Suga gave you a pointed look and you gave him a gritted smile, “Sure! Tea coming right up, sir.”
It wasn’t until you left the office did you realize that he gave no indication how you were supposed to make the tea. Bastard.
You wondered through the hallway and found a kitchen. Does he live here or something? And started to go through the cabinets to find tea. Eventually you found that there was some tea that was already brewed and still hot, so you put a cup and the kettle on a tray and walked back to the office. I’m not going to serve any for that trickster.
You opened the door to find that they were in a middle of a conversation, so you were careful to be quiet.
“…wish for?”
The man spoke up, “Because of my own experiences with poverty, I’ve always been obsessed with making money, no matter the means. This was all for my only son, whom I never wanted to experience what I had to go through.”
You set the cup in front of the man and started to pour the tea, he paid you no mind. You saw that there was a photo of an attractive young guy on the table and figured that this must be the son he was talking about.
“For the sake of his future, I also went through the trouble to set him up with an acceptable match. But…without any consideration for me he went ahead and started to date a poor, unhealthy girl.”
You started to walk away, but when you mentioned that you paused. This doesn’t sound good at all.
“I’ve tried everything to separate them, but none of it worked and that’s why I’m here today. I heard you’d grant any wishes as long as it doesn’t mess with life’s existence.”
No, don’t tell me—
“So I’ll make my wish, it doesn’t matter if I go to debt—please split up my son and that horrible girl.”
You look at Suga in shock, surely he wouldn’t—
Suga seemed unfazed, “Your wish has been received. Those two people will definitely have to part.”
Does this guy have a conscious? Any morals? Your opinion of him, if possible, dropped even lower.
The man smiled, “Oh, thank you! How much do you require…?”
“I don’t take money.” Suga said simply, “But the moment your wish is granted I will take your most prized possession.”
The man looked a bit worried, “My most prized possession? It’s not money?”
“For the most part, humans live without actually knowing what’s most important to them. The most important thing to you isn’t money. The moment your wish is granted, you’ll understand exactly what that is.”
“…alright. Whatever it is, it won’t be a big deal..”
“Alright, then you need to sign the contract, I—“
You couldn’t hold your tongue for a second longer and set down the tray on the desk hard as you glared at Suga, “Why are you such an ass? Do you have any sense of decency whatsoever?” You then turned to the man, “Same goes for you, baldy—making such a thing as your wish! You should be ash—“ You felt lips move but no sound came from it. You gave Suga at dirty look, knowing that he did this to shut you up. The nerve!
Both men seemed unfazed as the man signed the contract and asked, “Then when will you…?”
“It will be granted at midnight.”
The man nodded, stood up, and held up his hand, “Pleasure doing business with you.”
Suga shook his hand and the man walked pass you and left the office. You just looked at Suga in disbelief.
“You shouldn’t have interfered.”
You snorted and realized you were able to make sounds again, “You’d really grant such a wish? You think it’s just okay to grant any wish at all?”
He didn’t even looked up at you, “I don’t have any interest in human wishes to begin with. The only thing of importance is the precious possession I receive in return.”
Of course he wasn’t human, you thought, somehow that didn’t surprise you.
But still, granting a wish that will separate two people deeply in love…
“You’re truly evil.” You simply said, “I’ll stop that wish from coming true myself.”
He finally looked up, “Are you planning to kill me?”
“W-what?”
“Once a contract is made if the wish fails to be granted I’ll die.”, he simply said, like he was discussing the weather, “I have no intention of letting you get in my way. It may not look like much, but I stake my life every time I grant a wish.”
You were not amused at all, “An idiot who banks his life on such things deserves to die.”
Suga regarded you and there was a heavy silence. He then said, “Fine, then try it. If you really think you can. Let’s make a bet. If you succeed, I’ll release you from having to work for me.”
You were wary of making a bet with him, but this was so tempting. Not only will you be helping this couple, you could be free.
“But,” Suga continued, “if you fail, then you’ll remain in my employment until I get tired of you.”
Until he was tired of me?, you thought, I can be very annoying, he’ll soon grow tired of me.
For you, it was a win-win situation. You have to at least try to help this couple, you don’t think you’ll ever forgive yourself if you don’t try.
“Deal.”
You managed to worm the address of the apartment where the son and his fiancee is living from Suga.
Gotta hurry, there’s only four hours until midnight.
You were running to the direction of the address and slammed into a guy so hard you both feel on the floor. You sat up and looked over to see if the guy was alright but he was unconscious. Panicking, you rush over him and try to get him to wake.
“Oh shit—I’m sorry! Please don’t die, wake up!”
You heard strange sounds coming from him and paused, was that—-?
“Don’t worry,” the boy said, “This isn’t the sound of death, it’s my stomach growling.” He gave a small laugh and you were relieved that he was okay.
You then looked at his face and narrowed your eyes.
“Do I know you?”
He frowned as he slowly sat up, “I don’t think so…”
Wait—he’s the son! He looks just like the guy in the picture! Wow, it’s my luck that I run into him here.
Before you can say anything, he gave out a cry of disappointment, “Oh no! The dinner I made…”
You looked to see what he was looking at and saw a lunch box knocked over and the food was all over the pavement. You grimaced and looked at the boy, who looked like he was a bout to cry.
“I made it just for her…and it was all the money I had left…”
His stomach growled again and he looked at you in embarrassment.
Scrambling for the opportunity, you bluttered out, “Let me make it up to you--let me buy you some food!”
His face lit up, “You would do that? I’ll greatly appreciate it...”
You helped him off the floor and you guys walked to the nearest convenience store.
“What’s your name? Mine is y/n.”
“Chan.” He answered.
“So, you mentioned a girl…?”
Chan lit up, “Yes! My fiancee, Jeonghwa, I love her so much. She’s a few years older than me, but I don’t mind.”
“How did you guys met?” You asked, curious. He obviously loves Jeonghwa so much, he is so animated talking about her.
“I was doing a summer internship at my dad’s hospital, my dad owns a hospital by the way, when I met Jeonghwa in the cafeteria. She was so beautiful and so sweet, I had to talk to her. It took me a while to impress her and make her see me as a man, but it was all worth it.”
“If your dad owns a hospital, how are starving now?” You asked, you can already guess what had happened though.
Chan’s face distorted to anger, “Yeah all my dad cares about is money. When he heard that I got engaged to Jeonghwa he threatened to cut me off. And when that didn’t work he kicked me out of the house and said the only way he would want to see my face again was if I broke up with her.”
You were shocked by how cruel his father was, “Wow, I’m so sorry. My parents are dead, but at least they were never like that.”
“I’m sorry about your parents,” Chan sighed, “My dad wasn’t always like this. Before my mom died he was actually really decent and actually cared about me. Afterwards though, he became obsessed with money.”
You fell silent and you paid for the food, “...Well at least I can help out in this little way.”
Chan lit up, “No, this is awesome--you didn’t really have to do this. We really appreciate it!”
You smiled at Chan’s beaming face, he was a good kid.
You guys continued to talk as you walked to the bad side of town and entered a worn looking apartment building.
“Jeonghwa, love, look—food!” Chan said excitedly as he burst through the door.
It was a small one bedroom apartment, obviously very run-down, and a beautiful but frail woman was sitting on the bed.
“Where did you get all this food?” She then noticed your presence, “And who’s this?”
“It’s a funny story,” Chan replied as he started taking the food out and preparing it. He then explained how the two of you met, “She bought all this because she felt bad, noona.”
Jeonghwa frowned, “But Chan, you caused so much trouble for someone you don’t know. You’re really…” she then stopped and looked away.
Chan stopped his preparations, “You were going to call me young again, huh?”
“No, but when you do things like this I—“
“I’m not that young, I’ll work hard to make sure you’re taken care of.”
“What..?”
“I took a leave of absence from school—“
“What? You quit school?” Jeonghwa was obviously not happy and the couple obviously forgot that you were here because they were talking quite freely.
“No, I didn’t quit, I’m just taking a break—“
“That’s basically the same thing!”
“Look, I was kicked out of home so it’s not like I can afford to go to school anymore.”
“I told you not to worry about school. I’m better now and can work, I can support us.”
“Don’t say that! You barely recovered, how can you work?”
“I don’t want you to end up like me!” Jeonghwa cried, “A loser with no job or future.”
“Don’t say that.” Chan said, grabbing her hand, “You have a future.”
Jeonghwa was crying, “I don’t want to ruin yours though.”
Her tears made Chan’s eyes start to water, “You’re not ruining my future, noona!”
“Yes, I am!”
They were getting agitated and it was one line away from it becoming a full blown fight. You panicked, what if they end up breaking up? I have to do something…
“H-hey!” You called, getting their attention, “I can take care of the food, at least until you can afford it. My family died and now I get monthly income that’s more than enough, so I can help you.”
They both stared at you, then looked at each other.
“She must have hit her head really hard when she fell.”
“We must be very pitiful, huh?”
“She’s clearly not thinking well.”
“Clearly.”
Great, that had the opposite effect, “Look, look, I can really help—!”
They simply ignored me and Chan started to feed Jeonghwa.
“Eat this, since you haven’t eaten been able to eat in a few days.”
You kept trying to get their attention, but they seemed to be in their own little world.
No, I can’t fail…but they won’t even listen to me…, you thought.
“What about you…?” Jeonghwa asked.
Chan gave her a bright smile, “I already ate.”
Liar, you thought, if his stomach growling earlier was any indication.
Jeonghwa started to cough and Chan was instantly at her side, “Noona? Are you okay?”
She started to hug her stomach, “My stomach…it hurts…”
Chan started to panic as Jeonghwa fainted in his arms. He turned to you, “Y/N, what should I do?”
Tears started to well in his eyes and you quickly brought out your phone and called a taxi.
“We have to get her to the hospital fast.” You said and he nodded as he picked her up effortlessly.
The travel to the hospital was tense, Jeonghwa came back to consciousness but she was still feeling very weak and her stomach was still in pain.
She was carted into the emergency room and you had the task in trying to comfort Chan.
“I knew it wouldn’t last,” he mumbled, “this happiness. I knew sooner or later her sickness was going to be too much. I don’t know how I’m going to pay for this hospital bill.”
You again offered to help him, but he shook his head.
“Jeonghwa is right, it’s too much to ask for a stranger—you already did more than enough.”
Before you can argue about that, the doctor came out and Chan ran up to him.
“Well…?”
“Well the good news is that it’s nothing serious, she’s sick because you feed her such greasy food after days of not eating. But more importantly while I was running tests on her, I found out that her sickness has gotten much worse. If she doesn’t get surgery right away, she could die.”
Chan’s face fell, “But I can’t come up with the money right away…”
“I recommend you try to. Every minute is valuable.”
“But how could this be? Last time, you said she was getting better.”
“It’s perplexing to me too. It’s unusual for the patient to get worse in such a short time…”
Did Suga do this, you thought, the bastard, bringing Jeonghwa’s health into this—she could die!
You looked at the your phone and, sure enough, it was almost midnight. That son of a bitch, if she dies because of this…
You heard Chan sigh and looked up to him; he looked like he was debating something.
“There’s only one way...”
“What...?”
You noticed his father was there, and clenched your hands. Of course.
“You win,” Chan said solemnly, “If you can save her, I’ll do whatever you want. I won’t see her.”
His father smiled, “I knew you’ll come around.”
“They said she’ll get better once she gets surgery.”
“I’ll make sure she’s healed.”
“Then I’ll do it, I’ll break up with her.”
“No.” You whispered and looked at your phone. Midnight on the dot.
Chan’s father also realizes it’s midnight and he stared at his son as his eyes widened in panic, “Wait—”
Chan looked at his father in confusion, but then he suddenly collapsed. His father tried to catch him but he too went to the ground, unable to support all the weight. He started to panic.
“Chan! No, not my son!” Medics started to swarm around them and Chan’s father collapsed.
You were shook by the whole scene, which happened so quickly. You knew somehow Suga was responsible for all this and wondered if Chan ended up being his most prized possession.
I have to find Suga, you thought as you ran out of the hospital and to the direction of Suga’s office. Things can’t end like this.
You couldn’t remember when was the last time you ran this much, but by the time you reached the lobby you were really out of breath. You were able to catch your breath a bit when you were in the elevator. When the elevator door opened, you ran up to his office. Suga was resting in the couch. It seems like your entrance woke him up and he was glaring at you.
You ignored this and said, “What did you do to them?”
He simply stared at you.
“Well?” You asked, losing your patience.
“I didn’t do anything, now let me go to slee—“
He started to close his eyes when you poked his cheek, “Chan and his dad. The one who asked for the wish today—what did you do to them?”
Suga glared at you, “Don’t touch me. And I didn’t do anything to Chan. As for the father, I didn’t do anything to him, strictly speaking.”
“Then why did they both collapse? Right when the wish was granted, they collapsed.”
Suga seemed to realize that I wouldn’t leave until he offered me an explanation and let out a sigh. He slowly got up and started to walk. You followed him, confused. He walked down the hallway and opened one of the rooms. It was a room filled with vases and boxes. He went towards the middle of the room where there was a floating crystal orb. “See for yourself, they’re fine.”
“What—?”
He waved his hand and in the orb there was an image inside the crystal ball. It was Chan and his father, who was in a hospital bed. They seemed like they were talking and you heard soft voices coming from the orb. You strained your ears to listen.
“—you’re alright!”, the father grabbed Chan’s hands, as if making sure he was right there in front of him.
“Yeah, I’m fine,” Chan said awkwardly, “I was starved for so long that I must’ve gotten dizzy. But what happened to you? Do you feel fine? The doctor said you just collapsed because of stress.”
The father still looked shocked, as if he was trying to process everything, “Tell me, is that girl alright?”
Chan looked puzzled, “What?”
“Your fiancee—is she alright?”
“Y-yeah, they just finished the surgery on her and she should be recovering.”
“I’m glad that she’s doing better; you should go see her though.”
Chan looked so shook, “Wait, what? I thought you didn’t want me to see her again…”
“I know, but I while I thought you were gone I realized how silly I was being. You love her, right?”
“Y-Yes...”
“Then that’s all that matters. I was a fool before thinking that money will bring you happiness.”
“Father, I--” With tears in his eyes, Chan hugged his father, “Thank you.”
Confused at the scene in front of you, you turned to Suga.
“Why is he like that? You did do something to him after all.”
“I only took his most prized possession, as promised.”
“So then what did you—?”
“Greed” Suga answered, “Usually it’s a lie when parents say they do things in the kid’s best interest. He never did the things he did for his son, but because of his greed.”
You stood there in awe and looked back at the scene in the orb, “So what happens now?”
“Well since I took his greed away they’ll be happy, for now. But there’s always another type of greed that springs up eventually. Hopefully, he would learn his lesson by then.”
This guy, you thought, maybe he isn’t so bad after all.
“Did you plan this from the start?”
“No.” Suga simply said, “I knew his son was the most important thing so I risked my life and took the next best thing. Fortunately, it worked.”
He studied the vase labeled ‘greed’ and you have to say you were a little impressed.
“Do you do that often? Instead of taking someone special from them you take something else that can be lost?”
Suga laughed, “Oh no, I have taken souls before—see that vase?” He pointed to a vase across the room, “That’s my collection of good looking guys.”
You stared at him to see if he was joking but he was as serious as ever, “Wow, you’re sick—I definitely can’t trust you.”
And to think I was so close to thinking he was a good guy, I should have known.
Suga just smirked, “It’s probably better if you don’t. Well since you lost the bet, you’ll be working for me until I get tired of you. Which could be tomorrow, could be fifty years from now—we’ll see.”
You inwardly sighed, he’s right—I’m probably going to see him for god knows how long. The very least we can be is civil so that we don’t have such a miserable time. You held out your hand.
“I dunno if you know, but my name’s Y/N. In any case, I’m sorry I told you to die.”
He just stared at my hand and said, “Ah, yeah…”
So rude!, you thought as you awkwardly brought your hand down, “Don’t just say ‘ah yeah’. I said my name, so you’re supposed to say yours back.”
“You already know my name.”
“No, I meant your real name.”
There was a slight paused, then, “Just call me Suga. There’s a curse on my real name, so if you use it you’ll get hurt.”
Ugh, nothing can be simple with him, you thought, why do I feel like this is only the start of some cruel plan the universe had thought up for me?
“Fine, Suga.”
You were still suspicious of him and his agenda, he was still an absolute jerk, but at least you’re not alone anymore.
#suga fanfic#yoongi fanfic#bts fanfic#yoongi x reader#suga x reader#bts x reader#magic!yoongi#magic!bts#suga angst#yoongi angst#the magician and I
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Holding Onto Hope: Chapter 31
Destani
Wrapping my arms tighter around myself, I snuggled against the cool glass window and balled my fists into the oversized sleeves of my sweater. My body was drained and more than anything I was ready to get to my mama’s house and pass the hell out. Throughout the entire journey home, back to Virginia… I couldn’t bring myself anywhere close to sleep. Even after a long night up with Taylor before arriving at the airport for a seven a.m. flight, sleep still never found me on that flight. The only thing I could focus on was the girl I’d considered a sister since I was nine years old. She sat in the row across from me and though I tried not to stare, I couldn’t stop myself from carefully watching her tired and glossy eyes and her almost permanently reddened nose. She looked as though she hadn’t slept in days and like she’d burst into tears at the drop of a dime. The color had been flushed almost completely from her face and there were dark circles beneath her eyes and my heart ached for her. I knew she was grieving over what’d gone down with Chris and though I didn’t know the full details of what exactly happened from the time she went to confront him about everything I’d spilled to her to now, I knew something major had to have happened and it was physically showing all over her face and demeanor.
We took the trip home together with Mama J and Tawny, and I noticed that throughout most of the journey to and through the airport, Mama made sure to stay near Sy and there were often times that she looked as though she would simply fall apart, but Mama was always there to hold her up and quickly whisper words of encouragement to her. My own eyes would tear up every time I looked at her because this wasn’t the Sy’Diyah I knew… this was nowhere near the shy, but vibrant lil yellow girl I grew up with and claimed to the world was my blood sister.
I wasn’t fully in the loop on what’d happened with Chris either. All I really knew was that some shit popped off between them and now… it was just Mama J, Sy, Tawny, and myself on the way to our neighborhood. I didn’t even bother with my nosy ritual to find out what happened because this one was involving two of my best friends and I wanted to respect them both enough to not just dive right in their business.
Sy’Diyah sat in the middle seat between Tawny and I in the car with Tootie, who’d driven her boyfriend’s truck to pick us up, and Mama J at her side in the passenger seat. As I sat there, consumed with all thoughts of my best friend and all the stress in her life that I knew she didn’t need, I couldn’t help but briefly shut my eyes and smirk softly at the feeling of her snuggling against my back with her head resting against my shoulder. She was tired, I was sure of that, and if I had to remain in this position for hours on end just so she could get some rest I would do just that. Unfortunately there was no way she could snuggle up and sleep for long though… we were already rounding the corner to our street.
“Babe,” I whispered, frowning at the thought of having to disturb her from any sort of peace she’d found, “I’m sorry love, but we’re home.”
Slowly pushing herself up from me, she sat up sluggishly in her seat and kept her weary gaze straight. I cautiously watched her for a moment and frowned at the realization of just how exhausted she looked.
“Come on girls, lets head over and see Maddie.” Mama J said in a voice that sounded just as tired as Sy looked. There were a few times throughout our trip home where I could tell that she too looked as though she wanted to burst into some serious tears, but she always managed to maintain her composure, just so she could be strong for Sy.
Following her lead, we each climbed dreadfully out of the car and faced the bone chilling weather head on. We were smack dab in the middle of winter in Virginia and it was only a matter of time before the streets resembled a winter wonderland. A smile of relief washed over my face though, even as the icy wind whipped against my skin… we were finally home. Though I’d only just seen my mama a month ago, I guess I hadn’t realized just how home sick I was until I stood there breathing in the familiar Virginia air.
Mama J led the way through the grass and up the driveway to Auntie’s door and she barely had time to press her finger against the doorbell before the door went swinging open. Aunt Maddie stood there with her hands clasped together against her chest for a minute and I prayed she would snap out of her trance a little quicker… I didn’t have on nearly enough layers to keep standing in this damn cold!
“Oh my babies, I missed you!” She squealed, finally pushing the screen door open to allow us access. The moment we each crossed the threshold into the house, she swept Mama J into a hug and they whispered to each other for just a minute before she moved onto Tawny and myself. Saving her distraught niece for last, I stood off in the den and watched as she gripped onto her shoulders and stared through the most sympathetic eyes at her. Sy attempted to give her a half whit smile, but the smile never made it to her eyes… that were already filling with tears. It killed me to see this girl this way because in all my years of knowing her, I’d never witnessed her so out of character. I wasn’t used to not seeing her with a constant smile on her face. Wasn’t used to her endless waterworks… and I certainly wasn’t used to seeing her without her other half somewhere close by.
With a hard sniffle, I blinked rapidly in an effort to keep my own tears at bay and swiftly turned to find a seat in the den. As sad as I wanted to feel for the situation at hand and as much as I wanted to cry with each look I took into Sy’s heartbreaking stare, I knew I had to keep myself together for the sake of her. I knew we all needed to be as strong as we could… for her and Mama J.
--
We shared greetings and hugged and talked for a while in the den, but Auntie eventually loaded Sy up and led her upstairs to lie down. It wasn’t hard to tell that she desperately needed rest and because no one was quite sure how she’d react to being left alone, Aunt Maddie stayed with her until she drifted off to sleep then she slowly and quietly made her way back down to the den with us.
“Oh Tootie, thank you so much for getting them all home from the airport. I wanted to be there to see them off the plane, but I wanted to make sure everything here was set up just perfect for my baby girl.” Aunt Maddie said as she plopped back on the short sofa beside Mama J.
“Auntie you know it was no problem at all. I wasn’t gone leave them stranded up there… for too long.” Tootie laughed which, for once, gave us all something to laugh about.
“Well how are you ladies doing? How were finals?” Aunt Maddie asked, looking from me to Tawny.
“First of all, I think I can speak for both of us when I say I’m so glad finals are over!” I exclaimed, gaining a giggle from Tawny who’d been exceptionally quiet since we left Atlanta, “And I’m just really glad to be back home.”
“And I’m glad to have my babies back home.” We were left with a thick layer of silence then and I couldn’t help but glance quickly at Mama J. Though I knew Auntie’s statement meant absolutely no harm, there was still an underlying sting in what she’d said that I’m sure touched her directly. Sure we were all home, Tawny included, but… there was one missing.
“Well, um… the girls know you all are in town. They should be here any…” As if on cue, Aunt Maddie’s sentence was abruptly cut short by the sound of the doorbell ringing obnoxiously. I’d almost completely forgotten that we were indeed back in Richmond and my heart raced with excitement at the thought of who was just on the other side of the door. A bitch barely had time to turn to face the door as Aunt Maddie opened it, before a furry blur flew my way and sent me nearly toppling off the edge of the couch.
“Ahhhhhhh, my biiiiiiiiiiiiitch!” Tameka shrieked as she catapulted her body on top of me, completely disregarding the fact that she was still on the back side of the couch. She ran so fast and jumped at me so hard, she literally ended up flying over the back of the couch and landing in my lap where she sat halfway while she embraced me in a tight bear hug.
“Ms. Tameka honey, you better watch that language.” Auntie giggled as she shut and locked the door behind… Dontay! My vision was still blurred with Tameka hogging the space in my lap, but there was no way I could ignore the presence of Dontay and Nalay both edging forward into the den with the broadest smiles.
“Meka get your ghetto self up so we can see her too, with your dramatic behind.” Nalay laughed as she crossed over in front of us and waited for an eye rolling Tameka to climb off me.
“Whatever Nay, don’t be a hater all yo life.” With a pronounced smack of her lips, she reluctantly scooted into the empty space between Tawny and I.
“Hey Nay, I missed ya’ll!” I hadn’t had such a big smile on my face until now and after greeting both her and Dontay, it seemed almost permanent. I stood jammed between the two of them now with one arm wrapped snuggly around each of theirs, and Dontay of course towering over me on one side, and finally turned my attention back to the couch. The sight of Tawny sitting there wedged as far into the corner as she could get, with flushed cheeks and apprehension masking her face, left me smirking and shaking my head… I swear the girl was more shy than her sister when I met her ass a decade ago.
“Dontay, Nalay, Tameka…” Aunt Maddie started as she stood off to the side of us grinning like a proud mother, “I would like you all to meet Tawny, Sy’Diyah’s baby sister.”
Shocked was an understatement for each of their reactions and of course before anyone could gather their composure, Meka’s ratchet ass just had to be the first to speak up.
“Baby sister… like by blood? What the fu…”
Shooting a warning glare in her direction, Auntie quickly cleared her throat and shot a reassuring smile in Tawny’s direction “The girls were introduced over the Thanksgiving holiday and we now have the pleasure of having Ms. Tawny join us for Christmas. She was very excited to come up and spend time with all of the people who mean the most to her sister, so… in good Virginia fashion, let’s make her feel right at home.”
“Hi Tawny, I’m Nalay… it’s very nice to meet you.” Nay spoke up with the brightest grin plastered on her face. If no one else in this room was gonna make this girl feel at home with us, it would surely be Nay’s motherly ass.
“And I’m Dontay, but you can call me Don, or Tay… or baby… or baby daddy, if you wa…” Instinctively I nudged an elbow into Dontay’s side and cut my eyes at him. Knowing just how bad Tawny’s nerves were, I didn’t want the boy to freak her the hell out and have her running off back to Georgia before Christmas day! Much to my surprise, Tawny’s cheeks simply blushed… but she failed the hide the grin behind her right hand and I couldn’t help but laugh when she dropped her head and giggled. Maybe Dontay’s dried up game would finally pay off with Tawny.
“Well where Sy and Chris at? I mean I know they prolly tired after the flight, but Auntie I know you ain’t let them just stay upstairs sleep while we down here!” Tameka exclaimed.
Naturally, I tensed up at the mention of Sy’Diyah… and Chris. I could feel Aunt Maddie and Tawny both looking back and forth between each other and myself before Auntie finally cleared her throat and gave a tight-lipped smile.
“Well… Sy wasn’t feeling well when they landed, so she’s upstairs resting.”
“What about Chris? I was looking forward to seeing him and whooping up on him in some 2k for a couple hours.” Dontay asked with humor in his tone.
“He had a couple things to wrap up with finals and his coach before he could leave.” I blurted, sensing Auntie’s reluctance to speak up.
“Ahh man, Imma have to hit him up later then. I swear I miss my dawg Breezy… no homo though.” Dontay chuckled. By the looks of it, it seemed as though they’d fallen for what I’d said and for that I was thankful. I didn’t know when or if there would ever be a right time to explain to them all what’d transpired in Georgia only days before we came home. All I knew was now wasn’t the time or place to share that with them.
Like the old days, everyone quickly came out of a few layers of clothing and made themselves right at home and by the constant smile on Auntie’s face, I knew she was perfectly content. There was something to her eyes though… something that she couldn’t quite mask because it was something that I felt as well. I knew she was carrying the weight of her niece’s troubles right on her shoulders, just as I felt like I was carrying the weight of my two best friends on mine. I was happy to be home and thrilled to be surrounded by my childhood friends, but there was an unmistakable void there and I couldn’t help but wonder just how long it would take to fill it…
Hope
I could hear the commotion downstairs. The voices of several of my childhood friends couldn’t be ignored, especially as I lie there wide awake. I wasn’t tired, as my aunt had assumed… well, my body was, but there was no way I could get my mind to slow down enough to even consider shutting my eyes. My heart raced with anticipation, for what I wasn’t sure. I felt nauseas and even beneath the thick sweater and fluffy socks that should have had me sweating like a pig… I trembled with anxiety. Though I was in no mood to socialize with anyone, I figured perhaps it would help me temporarily get out of my funk if I at least got out of this room. Being alone and stuck in silence for too long hadn’t been ideal for me for a while now, so with a low sigh I pushed myself into an upright position and cringed at the sensation of my hair matted against the side of my face. I didn’t feel up to taming it or even putting it into a bun, so I swiftly swept a hand through it to at least gather it on one side of my head then stood up and sluggishly made my way to the door.
By the time I made it almost halfway down the stairs, I could hear the talking and laughing and jovial commotion growing louder and I shut my eyes briefly to imagine myself that happy again. The slightest smile graced my face as my mind instantly rushed to my one source of happiness and the thought of his perfectly freckled golden face had me gripping the railing of the stairs a little too tight.
“Oh man, Sy… is that you!” I barely had time to get my eyes open before a tall, burly figure rushed forward up the last couple of steps and tugged me into an airtight bear hug. My heart nearly exploded with excitement and I found myself throwing my arms around this aromatic frame and squeezing like my life depended on it. It was him… I just knew it was him! I nearly shed tears from the thought of having him in my arms again and I felt my lips stretching into a smile so wide, I was sure my mouth would simply tear at the corners.
“It’s so good to see you girl. Damn, we missed you around here.” That voice… it snapped me out of my major moment of bliss and I snatched my eyes open and refrained from frowning deeply, because… that voice wasn’t his. Pulling back just slightly, I peered up to see just who I’d latched onto like a lost puppy and I realized then that it was Dontay that I was hugging… not my Charlie.
“Hi Don, how are you?” I giggled, because I was still genuinely happy to see him.
“I’m good… real good, now. Like I swear I can’t explain how much we missed ya’ll ‘round here. Life just ain’t been the same without my kinfolk down here so I finally feel complete!” He exclaimed happily.
“Really bro… you just gone stand over here and hog her like that?” With a playful roll of his eyes, Dontay moved to one side with one arm still comfortably tossed over the back of my shoulders and neither of us had much time to prepare for Tameka and Nalay both rushing up the stairs toward me. Of course Tameka flew past Nalay and embraced me well before she had a chance to and after finally hugging both girls, it seemed all thoughts of my troubles were tucked away… if for only a moment. The three of them led me carefully down the remaining steps as if I was a fragile porcelain doll and I locked eyes with Destani briefly as we rounded the corner into the den. She gazed at me like a proud mother with a tiny smirk on her face and I found myself, genuinely, smiling right back. There was no reason for me to lock myself away in the depressing confines of my room for the duration of this break while I had loved ones I hadn’t seen in months ready and willing to cheer me up. Besides, being surrounded by everyone would only aide me in saving my tears and actually looking forward to Christmas.
“I swear I don’t know if I just haven’t seen you in forever or what, but bih you are glowing… I swear you are.” Tameka said once we all filled up the den and claimed a seat. In that instant I could feel piercing stares coming from exactly where both Tawny and Destani sat, but I’d learned to maintain my composure at this point and I simply smiled and swept a hand through my wild tresses.
“I’m not sure what glow you see over here with my lack of makeup and sleep, but… thanks Meka.” The room burst into jovial laughter and my eyes danced over the span of the room, pausing for only a second on my aunt whose stare had awkwardly landed on my stomach. Unconsciously I tossed an arm up into my lap, wrapping it around my midsection, and continued laughing along with the group, because it felt good to laugh and not think about the issues at hand… for once.
“Where Mama J go?” Destani didn’t miss a beat and jumped right into a new topic, leaving me to breathe a hushed sigh of relief.
“I think she said she was going with Tootie to pick up Desean from his dad’s. That girl has been off and on with his father for I don’t know how long now. But today… I think they’re off, so Joyce has to be a mediator.”
We laughed at her revelation and I sat back and enjoyed my moment of bliss, even if it was only temporary.
--
I found it hilarious how determined and serious Dontay seemed about attempting to talk to Tawny. Much to my surprise, he managed to get her to open up to him and my heart fluttered for her each time I heard her cackle at one of his corny jokes. Nalay seemed to warm up to her almost instantly, simply because it was in her nature to be friendly to even strangers, but Tameka was a completely different story. She seemed less than enthused to have anything to do with Tawny and she barely even acknowledged that the girl was in the house. Whether because Tawny seemed to have Dontay wrapped around her finger without even trying, or because she was just unnaturally territorial, I wasn’t sure… whatever the reason, Tameka made it clear that her distaste for her was very real.
The four of us managed to weasel out of the den, leaving Dontay alone with his efforts to swoon Tawny and my aunt to take a private phone call she refused to have in our presence. I led the group on into the kitchen and hopped onto a barstool as they each parted ways to find their own snacks as they’d always done since we were kids.
“It don’t even be nobody in this house and your aunt stay stocked up like she feeding a damn tribe!” Destani exclaimed from the overly packed pantry.
“Girl that’s why I been fuckin with Auntie since day one… she know how to take care of the poor!”
We shared a laugh at Tameka’s comical, yet solemn, comment as she maneuvered her way around making a sandwich as if she were in her very own kitchen.
“So what is new ladies? Where has our communication been for the past six months? I feel like I haven’t seen ya’ll in years!” Destani said as she claimed a seat across from me with a bag of puffy Cheetos in tow.
“Not a damn thing for my ass! Ya’ll know with my broke ass mama, I had to take what I could get so I’m holding it down right here in VA at Reynolds!” Tameka said.
“Hey, that school ain’t half bad though. My dad got his associates there and I’ve always thought it was decent” Nalay chimed in, popping skittles individually into her mouth.
“Tuh, bitch please… you at the University with a scholarship. Of course a bitch ass community college would be decent to you.” We laughed as Nalay shook her head and smiled with a roll of her eyes.
“Whatever Meka, If I wouldn’t have gotten that scholarship I would have happily been right there at Reynolds with you.”
After graduation, Tameka and Nalay had both decided to stay back in Virginia for school… Nalay, because of her academic scholarship at the University of Virginia and Tameka, because she wanted to be closer to her mom to help her out at home.
“Well how’s mama doing Meeks?” Destani asked.
“Girl she aiight. Her and her bad ass Rugrats continue to live on my nerves. I’m still helping her around the house, but a bitch had to step out and get her own place ‘cause I could and would not survive in that hell house another day”
“What! You got your own place? When nigga… see this lack of communication we been on is childish!” Destani said.
With the most ratchet giggle, Tameka popped a few chips in her mouth and twirled around to the fridge to grab a bottle of water “It ain’t nothing fancy bitch, but you know… it’s a lil som’n. My new bae got me a lil hosting job at the clubs he be promoting or whatever, so I’m just doing what I do right now.”
“You have a new boyfriend?” I asked.
She rolled her eyes up toward the ceiling then, all dreamy like as if the thought of this guy alone brought her the most romantic feelings “Honey, yes! I met his ass on campus and he… is… fine! Like for real ya’ll, I don’t think I’ve felt a nigga like how I’m feeling this nigga in like… ever!”
I stared at her and smiled broadly. It felt amazing for me to witness my friends this way… happy and dare I say… in love.
“And what about you Dez? Found anybody to tame your wild ass in Georgia?” Nalay asked with a giggle.
With a roll of her eyes, Destani scoffed and flipped her curly tresses to one side of her head dramatically “Yes the hell I have, actually. And baby boy knows exactly how to tame this wild ass too.”
I rolled my eyes almost as hard as her and shook my head as the girls ogled over the man who was finally able to tame the beast. She even went as far as whipping out her phone and pulling up Taylor’s Facebook page to show him off to the girls, who of course ooh’d and aww’d and blew her head up even bigger than it already was over him.
“What about you Nay? Boo thang yet or is your head so far in the books you can’t see past the ink to find a nigga?” Destani snickered, leaning to the side to high five Tameka.
“Um, for your information Ms. Nosy… I am dating someone.” She said with a sly smirk.
“Where you meet him at?” Tameka asked.
“Here in Richmond…” Her sly smirk grew a bit and she raised a brow to match her mischievous expression.
“In Richmond… hol’ up, we know him?”
She nodded slowly and cast her gaze down onto the granite countertop “BJ…”
A layer of silence washed over the room for a split second before both Tameka and Destani burst into a screaming fit of excitement. I giggled at their antics and watched as Nalay slapped her hands up over her reddened face with embarrassment.
“Awww, don’t be embarrassed girl! You got you a good ole country Richmond nigga, ain’t nothing wrong with that… that’s what Sy did and her and Breezy are doing just fine.” Tameka laughed. The girls continued to laugh, but my laughter died down almost instantly as I absorbed her comment.
Before I could think to stop myself, I cleared my throat and crossed my arms over my midsection “Chris and I… we um… we actually broke up.”
Within seconds the entire kitchen was so silent, I had to look around to ensure I wasn’t the only one still sitting there. Nalay and Tameka both stared at me like two deer caught in headlights and Destani softly cleared her throat and dropped her head. For a moment I was overwhelmed by the silence and the sudden layer of awkwardness that seemed to sweep over the room and after a while I started to feel microscopic under the hard stare of the two girls.
“Aw Sy… I’m so sorry.” Nalay finally spoke up, in the softest and most sympathetic tone. Of course with her sitting closest to me, she reached over and pulled me into a side hug that should have had me crying, but after all the tears I’d been shedding lately I was thankful that I was finally learning to get a grip on my emotions.
“Well damn, if ya’ll ain’t make it… it ain’t no hope for the rest of us,” Tameka said with an expression of defeat on her face, prompting Destani to nudge her roughly in the side, “Shit bitch, ow! I’m just saying… I think we all had high ass hopes for Sy and Chris. I mean, no bullshit… they a match made in heaven.”
“That is true. Ya’ll were always the perfect couple… even before you became a couple.” Nalay said, leaving us all laughing awkwardly and sadly.
“But I mean, I thought it would be the end of humanity before ya’ll separated. What happened babe?” Tameka asked. The dreaded question… what happened. The question I’d hoped I could somehow avoid for the duration of this visit, had just come to light and it left my stomach churning. I couldn’t bring myself to reveal the dirty details of the demise of our relationship, so with a deep sigh through my nose I slowly shook my head and nibbled nervously into the inside of my lip.
“We just um… we decided to take a break for a while.” I mumbled. It wasn’t necessarily a lie that I’d told. It just wasn’t the cold and bitter truth that I myself could barely handle. I hadn’t even shared the complete truth with Destani because I simply couldn’t fathom the thought of anyone else harboring that truth.
#chrisbrown#chrisbrownff#chrisbrownfanfic#jasminesanders#chrisbrownfanfiction#jasminesandersff#teambreezy#teambreezyff#fanfiction#fanfic
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alli’s Arrow 1x21 rewatch thoughts
Aka the one where Felicity goes from a person who’s “setting up Oliver’s internet” to his “friend.” Aka this is really long but I think it’s so important in the progression of Olicity and for understanding Oliver’s character and how Laurel fits in.
-------------------
“Better get started then.” OLIVER SASS! Barely there, but still. I love how he’s starting to play with her, just a little.
And then:
“He’s the one who left, Felicity. I did everything I could to stop him.”
“Except apologize....” That’s right, Felicity! Don’t let him get away with that.
THEN:
“I’m sorry - who are you?” ENTITLED LAUREL, wow. Obviously Felicity knows Oliver - what right to you have to demand an explanation from her?
“Nobody. I mean I’m not nobody, I’m someone, obviously, and so are you, you’re Laurel, right? That Laurel - Gorgeous Laurel?” Meanwhile Felicity’s reaction here is so adorable and so revealing:
- it shows how, even though she has confidence in her own intelligence and values, she has a deeply embedded sense of inferiority when it comes to certain types of women (the Laurel-types, who are conventionally beautiful and successful and universally adored). It shows that to some extent she sees herself as an outsider. (Not that she sees herself as lacking, exactly...I think many of us who relate to her see where I am going with this. Not that we would change things about ourselves, but that we feel like outsiders because we’re not conventionally beautiful/successful/fashionable/etc.)
- it also shows how Oliver’s continued obsession with Laurel reinforces that sense of inferiority/outsiderness. That she won’t directly assert herself between Oliver and Laurel because she assumes that Oliver would “take Laurel’s side” if he were required to make a choice between them. (With this in mind, oh how sweet 2x23 and everything after is). (Side note: in season 2 we get a delicious follow-up to this scene when Felicity DOES assert herself between Laurel and Oliver - in 2x04 at a fancy party when Felicity says to Laurel, “You can have him back in a minute” and Oliver goes with her - and it is an awesome moment showing the progression of their relationship. I live for this stuff 😎)
Meanwhile, Oliver’s little smile at Felicity here is adorable because it shows, again, that he’s simply charmed by her, and he doesn’t necessarily see her as inferior.
“This is Felicity. She’s setting up my internet.” That being said, his need to maintain his secret identity ruse - and his need at this point to preserve separation between his two identities (the “Oliver Queen” identity and relationships that he puts on a pedestal, versus the “Hood” identity and relationships which he still sees as somewhat “monstrous” and tainted) causes him to basically devalue her in front of Laurel. His response completely diminishes her actual importance and is particularly ironic because, between Laurel and Felicity, Felicity is the person who actually knows the real him at this point. *More on this later*
I’m not a Laurel-hater, but if anything was ever going to make me dislike Laurel, it would be this scene.
MOOOORE below the cut!
Meanwhile, once they go downstairs and get to work, it turns out Felicity has casually been EXTRA BRILLIANT by making the Walter connection. Because already she is more than just tech assistance, but a crime-solving PARTNER and Oliver just totally devalued her in front of Laurel and okay I am a little bitter. But the end of the episode will help make it better.
Felicity’s sass regarding Diggle is awesome - I love how she never misses an opportunity to prod Oliver to be better.
And how freaking heroic is it that she just casually presumes that she will go undercover, even after having been made a hostage during Dodger? It’s not at all like this is what she signed up for when she started helping Oliver.
Oliver’s protectiveness of her is adorable though. And the way he goes to lay down the law, “Felicity, I’m not letting you -” and then she just talks over him, “Oliver, the reason I joined you in the first place….” *Sigh* quality stuff right here. Also the way that they use each other’s first names for emphasis, even though they’re talking to each other and they’re the only people there. It’s adorable.
THE INTENSITY: “You have to let me do this.” AND THE UNINTENTIONAL SEXUAL TENSION: “All right. But we do it my way.”
DELICITY! Ugh this friendship is so perfect, John is perfect, Felicity is perfect, their chemistry and interactions are amazing (it’s still season 1 - how is this even possible??). Why did we not get a bazillion more scenes like this? I mean, I know it’s not strictly necessary, since their close friendship and alliance comes through even in peripheral interactions, but come on...it’s just quality content!
“It feels really good having you inside me” scene: what can I say about this scene that hasn’t been said a million times? *swoooon* I will note that I particularly love how nervous you can tell Oliver is after he says “If anything happens, I’m right outside” and Felicity responds “Okay” and looks down: the way he sweeps his eyes over her with that worried expression and takes a deep breath.
“Oh look, there’s the bathroom. Should have known the manager’s office would be down the hall and to the right of the bathroom.” LOL I adore this line - she’s smart and obvious and hilarious.
“You’re gonna be really upset when you meet my partner.” I love how she’s relying on him to rescue her, how much confidence she has in him. And Oliver busting in to save her is pretty hot.
Meanwhile, pretty risky of Oliver to take his hood off in there since they probably have security cameras, but anyway it’s sweet that he did it so he could share a meaningful look with Felicity.
Felicity walking down the stairs and turning the light on sitting-in-the-dark Oliver - I love this show’s use of metaphorical imagery.
I want to know who was piloting that plane that Oliver jumped out of. Whoever that person was, they must know Oliver’s the vigilante lol
Okay so this second scene totally parallels the “Felicity-interrupting-Oliver-and-Laurel” scene, in a way that shows their relationship has PROGRESSED:
“This is totally a family thing, isn’t it?”
“I’m sorry, who are you?” Unlike Laurel, Moira’s question isn’t at all entitled. She is actually more polite than she strictly needs to be.
“This is Felicity. She’s my friend.” This time when Oliver introduces Felicity, after everything she just risked and proved by helping rescue Walter, Oliver cannot deny her friendship. Even though he still needs to hide his secret from his family, and as much as he is trying to keep his identities separate so that his Hood persona won’t taint his “true” life and family and friends, he can’t deny that Felicity is a friend to anyone anymore. And! The way he describes their relationship from this point forward only gets more and more intimate. ^_^
For the record: Oliver thinking he loves Laurel at this point has EVERYTHING to do with the fact that he now thinks she’s the only “pure” person left from his former life who’s not tainted by lies and conspiracy and intrigue. He just found out that his mother and Tommy’s dad are involved in the undertaking, and everything he held as sacred about his former life is crashing down around him and it is making her seem more pristine by comparison. He is still holding on to the illusion that by “righting his father’s wrongs” he can redeem himself for everything he did during his 5 years away and before, and Laurel being pure is the key to that. He thinks that’s love, but obviously everyone who isn’t Oliver knows it’s not.
@jules85 @blondeeoneexox @hope-for-olicity @memcjo
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In honor of reputation coming out in 7 days, I decided to share with you my favorite lyrics from every song (91!) from all her released albums.
Taylor Swift
Tim Mcgraw : When you think happiness, I hope you think “that little black dress”
Picture to burn : So watch me strike a match on all my wasted time. As far as I’m concerned you’re ust another picture to burn
A Place in this World : Don’t know what’s down this road. I’m just walking trying to see through the rain coming down
Cold As You : Every smile you fake is so condescending, countin’ all the scars you’ve made
The Outside : I tried to take the road less traveled by, but nothin’ seems to work the first few times
Tied Together with a Smile : You’re tied together with a smile, but you’re coming undone
Stay Beautiful : If you and I are a story that never gets told, if what you are is a daydream I’ll never get to hold, at least you’ll know
Should’ve Said No : I can’t resist, before you go, tell me this : was it worth it? Was she worth this?
Mary’s Song : And I’ll be eighty-seven, you’ll be eighty-nine. I’ll still look at you like the stars that shine in the sky
Our Song : He’s got a one-hand feel on the steering wheel, the other on my heart
I’m Only Me When I’m With You : I don’t try to hide my tears, my secrets or my deepest fears. Through it all nobody gets me like you do
Invisible : Like shadows in a faded light, we’re invisible. I just wanna open your eyes and make you realize.
A Perfectly Good Heart : Maybe I should’ve seen the signs, should’ve read the writing on the wall and realized by the distance in your eyes that I would be the one to fall
Teardrops On My Guitar : So I drive home alone, as I turn off the light, I’ll put his picture down and maybe get some sleep tonight
Fearless
Jump Then Fall : I had time to think it all over and all I can say is come closer, take a deep breath and jump then fall into me
Untouchable : Untouchable, burning brighter than the sun and when you’re close I feel like coming undone
Forever & Always : So here’s to everything coming down to nothing, here’s to silence that cuts me to the core
Come In With The Rain : I’ll leave my window open ‘cause I’m too tired tonight to call your name. Just know I’m right here hoping that you’ll come in with the rain
SuperStar : And I knew from the first note played, I’d be breaking all my rules to see you
The Other Side Of The Door : Me and my stupid pride are sitting here alone, going through the photographs, staring at the phone
Fearless : In this moment now capture it remember it
Fifteen : When all you wanted was to be wanted, wish you could go back and tell yourself what you know now
Love Story : I got tired of waiting, wondering if you were ever coming around. My faith in you was fading when I met you on the outskirts of town
Hey Stephen : The way you walk, way you talk, way you say my name
It’s beautiful, wonderful, don’t you ever change
White Horse : I was a dreamer before you went and let me down
You Belong With Me : And you’ve got a smile that could light up this whole town, I haven’t seen it in a while since she brought you down
Breathe : Never wanted this, never wanna see you hurt. Every little bump in the road I tried to swerve
Tell Me Why : Why do you have to make me feel small so you can feel whole inside? Why do you have to put down my dreams so you’re the only thing on my mind?
You’re Not Sorry : Could’ve loved you all my life if you hadn’t left me waiting in the cold
The Way I Loved You : Breakin’ down and comin’ undone, it’s a roller-coaster kinda rush, and I never knew I could feel that much
The Best Day : I know you were on my side even when I was wrong
Change : So we’ve been outnumbered, raided and now cornered. It’s hard to fight when the fight ain’t fair
Speak Now
Sparks Fly : The way you move is like a full on rainstorm and I’m a house of cards
Back To December : It turns out freedom ain’t nothing but missing you, wishing I’d realized what I had when you were mine
Speak Now : Horrified looks from everyone in the room, but I’m only lookin’ at you
Dear John : I took your matches before fire could catch me so don’t look now. I’m shining like fireworks over your sad empty town
Mean : You, with your switching sides and your wildfire lies and your humiliation, you have pointed out my flaws again as if I don’t already see them
The Story Of Us : You held your pride like you should have held me
Never Grow Up : And no one’s ever burned you, nothing’s ever left you scarred. And even though you want to, just try to never grow up
Enchanted : Walls of insincerity, shifting eyes and vacancy vanished when I saw your face
Better Than Revenge : She thinks I’m psycho ‘cause I like to rhyme her name with things
Innocent : I guess you really did it this time : left yourself in your warpath.Lost your balance on a tightrope. Lost your mind tryin’ to get it back
Haunted : You and I walk a fragile line. I have known it all this time but I never thought I’d live to see it break
Last Kiss : So I’ll watch your life in pictures like I used to watch you sleep and I feel you forget me like I used to feel you breathe
Long Live : Long live the walls we crashed through. All the kingdom lights shined just for me and you
Ours : The verdict comes from those with nothing else to do. The jury’s out, and my choice is you.
If This Was A Movie : Maybe I’ve been going back too much lately when time stood still and I had you
Superman : I’m far away but I never let you go. I’m lovestruck and looking out the window. Don’t forget, don’t forget where I’ll be
Mine : You made a rebel of a careless man’s careful daughter
RED
State Of Grace : So you were never a saint and I loved in shades of wrong
Red : Regretting him was like wishing you never found out that love could be that strong
Treacherous : Put your lips close to mine, as long as they don’t touch. Out of focus, eye to eye, till the gravity’s too much
I Knew You Were Trouble : And the saddest fear comes creeping in : that you never loved me or her, or anyone, or anything
All Too Well : You call me up again just to break me like a promise, so casually cruel in the name of being honest. I’m a crumpled up piece of paper lying here
22 : We’re happy free confused and lonely at the same time. It’s miserable and magical
I Almost Do : I bet it never ever occurred to you that I can’t say “Hello” to you and risk another goodbye.
We Are Never Ever Getting Back Together : I’m really gonna miss you picking fights, and me falling for it screaming that I’m right, and you would hide away and find your peace of mind with some indie record that’s much cooler than mine
Stay Stay Stay : All those times that you didn’t leave; It’s been occurring to me I’d like to hang out with you for my whole life.
The Last Time : You wear your best apology, but I was there to watch you leave
Holy Ground : We blocked the noise with the sound of ‘I need you’, and for the first time I had something to lose,
Sad Beautiful Tragic : Distance, timing, breakdown, fighting, silence, this train runs off its tracks. Kiss me, try to fix it, could you just try to listen?
The Lucky One : And they tell you that you’re lucky but you’re so confused, ‘cause you don’t feel pretty, you just feel used.
Everything Has Changed : And all my walls stood tall painted blue, but I’ll take ‘em down and open up the door for you
Starlight : Look at you, worrying too much about things you can’t change. You’ll spend your whole life singing the blues if you keep thinking that way.
Begin Again : I’ve been spending the last eight months thinking all love ever does is break and burn and end
The Moment I Knew : You called me later and said, “I’m sorry, I didn’t make it, ” and I said, “I’m sorry too, ”. And that was the moment I knew.
Come Back Be Here : I told myself don’t get attached, but in my mind I play it back, spinning faster than the plane that took you,
Girl At Home : And it would be a fine proposition if I was a stupid girl, but honey I am no-one’s exception, this I have previously learned.
1989
Welcome To New York : Took our broken hearts and put them in a drawer
Blank Space : Magic, madness, heaven, sin. Saw you there and I thought “Oh my God, look at that face. You look like my next mistake”
Style : I should just tell you to leave 'cause I know exactly where it leads but I watch it go round and round each time
Out Of The Woods : The rest of the world was black and white, but we were in screaming color
All You Had To Do Was Stay : The more I think about it now the less I know. All I know is that you drove us off the road
Shade If Off : The haters gonna hate, hate, hate, hate, hate
I Wish You Would : We were a crooked love in a straight line down
Bad Blood : Band-aids don’t fix bullet holes
Wildest Dreams : You see me in hindsight tangled up with you all night
How You Get The Girl : Stand there like a ghost shaking come the rain
This Love : Clear blue water, high tide came and brought you in
I Know Places : Lose lips sink ships all the damn time
Clean : Rain came pouring down when I was drowning, that’s when I could finally breathe
Wonderland : You search the world for something else to make you feel like what we had
You Are In Love : You understand now why they lost their minds and fought the wars, and why I’ve spent my whole life try to put it into words
New Romantics : I could build a castle out of all the bricks they threw at me
#taylor swift#taylornation#taylurking#fearless#speak now#red#1989#can't wait to add reputation to the list#mine#reputation#took me 3h to make this#feeling nostalgic
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Google's Pixel Buds: Wireless earbuds for the extremely tolerant
yahoo
Google’s Pixel Buds really sounded like they’d be pretty great. Imagine: Google’s version of Apple’s wireless AirPods. Same $160 price, same earbud-recharging carrying case (good for 24 hours’ worth of earbud recharges), and the same ability to let you speak, hands free, to your synthesized voice assistant, without having to pull the phone out of your pocket.
In fact, they sounded better than the AirPods, because the right and left earbuds are reassuringly connected by a wire instead of completely detached. The assistant is Google Assistant, which lots of people find superior to Siri. And above all, Google Translate is built in.
This is it! This is the “Star Trek” communicator! This is the Babel Fish! This is you, going forth into China or Norway or Brazil and having conversations with the locals—they speak, and you hear the English translation in your ears! For $160!
Or not.
As it turns out, the Pixel Buds sound terrific for music and respond well to Assistant requests. But the real-time translation thing is kind of a bust.
The Pixel Buds are wireless in the sense that they don’t plug into your phone—but there is a cord connecting the buds.
Meet the Case
The Pixel Buds come in a strange little clamshell case. It’s cheap-feeling plastic, covered with some kind of felt or fabric.
The buds charge in their fabric-covered case, thanks to a USB-C cable.
The earbuds themselves last 5 hours on a charge, but the case contains a recharging battery good for a total of 24 hours of earbud power. The case is otherwise a misfire, though. First, there are no indicators on the outside of it. Just to see if it’s charging, or how full the charge is, you have to open it and remove the earbuds. Baaaad design.
Second, the case doesn’t close unless the earbud cable is completely clear of the edges. To do that, you’re supposed to snap the right and left earbuds into their corresponding holes, and then wrap the fabric-covered cable twice around the case prongs, then thread it up the center and tap it flat.
It’s such a production that Google felt the need to include a diagram on the inside of the lid.
The latest Google phones don’t have headphone jacks—so Google offers these wireless earbuds.
Meet the Buds
The Buds are fussy in another way, too.
I have goofy ear cartilage; like about 10% of the population, I’m missing the antitragus, the bottom cartilage flap that holds most earbuds in. As a result, I can’t keep these things in my ears—they fall out constantly—and when they are in, the hard plastic gets painful after only a few minutes. I haven’t heard other people complain about the Buds falling out, but complaints about the discomfort are common.
The earbud cord goes through a hole in the bottom of the bud and then doubles back down into the top, forming a loop. You’re supposed to tuck this loop into your upper ear cartilage to help hold the thing in place. Unfortunately, the loop’s size tends to slip when you take the buds in or out of your ears, so you wind up having to adjust them often.
You’ll spend a lot of time fussing with the Loop.
All of this means that the Pixel Buds are fussy and inconvenient to get in and out, especially compared to the AirPods (sorry, Apple haters). With those, when you want to listen to something—say, a Facebook video that you decide to play—you just flip open the case’s lid, grab a bud, and slap it in.
Note, too, that these buds aren’t intended to block background noise. That’s good from a safety standpoint—you’ll hear traffic—but not so great for use on planes and downtown, where ambient noise will ever be with you.
Bud Control
Each Pixel Bud is made of two globs of plastic: One that’s supposed to go into your ear, and a larger part that’s touch sensitive (on the right earbud only).
You tap this surface to play/pause music or answer/hang up calls; double-tap it to hear notifications or your upcoming appointments; and you keep your finger pressed on it when you want to talk to Google Assistant.
These massive plastic bulbs aren’t the most comfortable thing to jam in your ears.
In that regard, the Buds are terrific: You don’t have to say “OK Google” before every command. Just touch that right bud surface, in the manner of a newscaster saying, “This just in!”
You can also swipe forward on that bud surface to adjust the volume when music is playing. That’s a lot more convenient than having to speak your volume-adjustment commands, as you must on the AirPods.
Google Assistant works exceptionally well with the Buds— if your phone runs Android Marshmallow or a later version (that’s the late 2015 edition). You can listen to notifications, dictate texts and emails, ask for information, place and answer calls, start and stop music—all without ever hauling your phone from your pocket. It’s just incredibly responsive and quick.
The only problem with that touch-sensitive right-bud surface is that it’s hard to avoid touching it during the origami session of putting the buds back into their case. You wind up starting music playback accidentally. Auuugh.
(One last comparison: The Apple AirPods pause music automatically when you remove one from your ear, and resume the music when you put it back in. The Pixel Buds, lacking the “Am I in the ear?” sensor, doesn’t do that, and you really miss it.)
Live Translation!?
And now what we’ve all been waiting for: live real-time language translation!
Sort of.
First, it works only with Google’s own Pixel 2 phone. If you have any other Android phone, you’re out of luck.
Here’s how it works.
You open up Google Translate, touch your earbud, and say, “Help me speak French” (or whatever language).
You hand your phone to the French speaker. While pressing your right earbud, you say, “Excuse me. I’ve hurt my foot. Is there a hospital nearby?”
The phone thinks for a moment (assuming you have an internet signal), and then both speaks and displays the French version: “Excusez-moi. Je me suis fait mal au pied. Y a-t-il un hôpital à proximité?”
You point to the little microphone button on the lower-right side of the screen, and gesture for the French speaker to hold it down while speaking. She might say, for example, “Vous devrez prendre le train pour Paris. Il n’y a rien autour d’ici.”
After she does so, you hear, in your earpiece, her answer: “You’ll have to take the train to Paris; there’s nothing around here.”
Repeat from step 3 to continue the conversation.
The translation feature is no better or worse than just using the Google Translate app by itself.
The translations—well, they’re exactly what you’d see on Google’s Translate web page. A perfect translation is rare; usually, you get the gist; and sometimes, you get hilarious or disastrous misfires. (I told a Chinese-speaking friend, “I love your work! You should get a promotion!” And she heard, in Chinese, “I want your job. You need some improvement.”)
The dirty little secret is that you can do this translation stuff without the Pixel Buds, and without a Pixel phone. Any Android phone running the Google Translate app does all of this already; the only difference is that you’re hearing the English translation in your earbuds instead of from the phone’s speaker.
(If you do have a Pixel phone, another benefit awaits: Automatic pairing when you open the charging case. That’s supposed to make a “Connect?” message pop up on the phone, so a single tap makes the connection. I had a lot of trouble getting that to happen, though; I wound up having to press the Pair button inside the case. Speaking of pairing: You have to pair these things manually every time you switch devices—from phone to laptop, say. It’s not automatic, as it is on the Apple ones.)
Not your best buds
There are lots and lots of fantastic wireless earbuds; here’s my review of 40 of them. Most of them cost less than the Buds, fit more comfortably and solidly, and don’t require any Boy Scout knot-tying every time you put them away.
What they don’t do, of course, is let you touch the right earbud when you want to speak to Google Assistant. But the Pixel Buds command a very steep price—in usability, convenience, comfort, and dollars—for that luxury.
More from David Pogue:
Royal Caribbean’s big bet on new tech
Battle of the 4K streaming boxes: Apple, Google, Amazon, and Roku
iPhone X review: Gorgeous, pricey, and worth it
Inside the Amazon company that’s even bigger than Amazon
The $50 Google Home Mini vs. the $50 Amazon Echo Dot — who wins?
The Fitbit Ionic doesn’t quite deserve the term ‘smartwatch’
Augmented reality? Pogue checks out 7 of the first iPhone AR apps
David Pogue, tech columnist for Yahoo Finance, is the author of “iPhone: The Missing Manual.” He welcomes nontoxic comments in the comments section below. On the web, he’s davidpogue.com. On Twitter, he’s @pogue. On email, he’s [email protected]. You can read all his articles here, or you can sign up to get his columns by email.
#tech#Pogue#David Pogue#_lmsid:a077000000BAh3wAAD#$GOOGL#_revsp:yahoofinance.com#$GOOG#$AAPL#_uuid:1c5def89-180a-3c93-91d2-4b0ebe653166#_author:David Pogue
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Giant: Ch. 9
Our bodies are weak,
We're tired and hurting
Will we ever get to the other side?
Dunno but I swear I'll die trying.
The first date was enough to prove that she was certain Kara wasn’t going to escape how she felt about Lena Luthor. And it wasn’t just the thirty six hours of talking and reacquainting. It wasn’t even the way the CEO effortlessly accepted whatever happened, becoming Kara’s number one defender and supporter. It certainly wasn’t waking up next to messy hair tickling her nose or an uptick in her take out deliveries, though all were benefits in their own little way.
Kara realized that it was real, that she had the big kind of feelings for Lena Luthor, quite quickly, and with much alarm. It was the way Lena always held her hand over her mouth when she caught herself laughing too hard, and the way that Lena’s eyes were like life itself. It was the fourth and fifth date and how they were perfectly imperfect, interrupted by a shootout, and the other by an angry investor from Hong Kong, while the date watched and let the other work before teasing them the rest of the night. It was the way Kara could flop on Lena’s couch while she worked and bug her still until she gave up work and let Kara take her to a movie. It was the way Lena got so excited about the robot knee she was building in her spare time, and how she worked on it and held screwdrivers between her teeth and tucked behind her ear, waving them as she explained and Kara feigned understanding. It was the way Kara saw all of those things and catalogued them like precious stones in her memory.
Kara gave the dream, the idea that she could shake Lena, could get her out of her system as nothing more than a gradeschool crush, until they’d had a good solid talk about their place. She knew that they skated around things, but she knew that they tackled what they could, head on, gloves off, out in the open. When she saw that happen, she knew Lena was trying, and she knew what would come next. When Lena told her she was in it, that she was very much afraid and very much out of her element, and very terrified of losing her, but still ready to try, Kara knew she was in deep as well, knew it was more than a crush.
Lena didn’t tell her to, but when Kara told her she was going to have the talk with her sister, it signaled a change, and even the CEO knew it. It wasn’t real until then, it wouldn’t be. For Kara to tell her sister, meant it was something that had a future, and that was a new kind of exhilarating, beautiful, beautiful in the way that the ocean is when waves crush shores and roar and engulf.
They had weeks of trying. They had months of deciding. Kara was in it and she didn’t care at all about anything else, because for the first time since her world imploded, since she saved that plane and became Supergirl, for the first time since her father died and the galaxy kept spinning, she felt centered again, she felt a little more in harmony with the universe, and that was what she chased for dear life. The dream that sprouted from a simple article, was becoming reality. It had to become real and she was sick of living a triple life. She just wanted one. One where she was Supergirl, and a reporter, and had a smoking hot girlfriend.
And while the notion of telling Alex was a big deal, the execution was far more daunting, and oddly terrifying to the younger sister.
“Are you shitting me?” Alex balked, disgusted and alarmed. “Lena Luthor. Luthor as in Lex and Lionel, Luthor? Notorious alien-haters, Luthors? You. And her. I know you’ve been distracted. I thought it was just… I thought it was me being distant, off with Maggie. But Luthor!”
“Don’t be mad,” Kara offered, wringing her hands and wincing as her sister stood up from the stool across from her and began to pace through her apartment.
“Mad?” she pfft’d. “Why would I be mad? Why would I be worried about you? You’ve got it under control!”
“She’s not like her brother or father. They just--”
“Don’t you dare make excuses for those monsters,” Alex stopped her, holding up her hand decisively. “I swear, Kara, you’d forgive someone for stabbing you right in the back if they apologized.”
Her sister paced, back and forth, working it out in her head. She held her hand over her mouth as she concentrated, her nostrils flaring in consternation. It felt like a dumbbell in her gut, but Kara let her have her feelings. She knew it would be difficult, perhaps even most difficult, with the people who knew her as Supergirl. That was why she had to be sure. And she was.
She was certain about Lena, the girl who sent her take out when she was working late, and Lena, the girl who was nothing like the Luthors in the news, but more like the Luthors that Kara remembered as a far away fever dream, who pushed meetings for soccer games and focused on the family and their real life over a dollar, that Lena was so beyond set on Kara, she just didn’t know it or refused to admit it just yet. Lena, the girl who had to buy a whole new apartment’s worth of furniture and teased Kara until she was red and blushing all over before kissing her and promising that it was in need of an update anyway. Lena, the girl who had a penchant for sweet kisses, the soothing kind that came in the form of an absent peck on the nose or forehead, and it was so natural, it just happened, and she would catch herself and furrow almost, wondering who she became, and Kara would watch and kiss her back quickly to approve. Lena, the girl.
But Kara had time. She could take the first step for a girl like that.
“You can’t. It’s too dangerous,” she finally decided. “I’m sorry, Kara.”
“You can’t tell me who I see.”
“You have to be reasonable--”
“I’ve known her for years, Alex,” Kara shook her head and started to raise her voice. “She was at our father’s funeral. She was there for me when you left. I’ve… I’ve been crazy about her since I met her, but I stayed away because of who I am, when all along she already knew, and tried to protect me. But I can have it all. I can be happy. It’s not too selfish to want just… a little… something for me?”
“That was then, before--”
“She hasn’t done anything wrong!” Kara groaned, hands flailing to her side as she shook her head, already regretting the entire conversation. She understood where her nerves came from, though couldn’t place it directly. She knew what it was going to turn into before it even started.
“You’re telling me that you honestly, with your entire being, believe that Lena Luthor doesn’t have a cache of Kryptonite sitting in a vault somewhere in that fancy office downtown? Or one of her labs?”
Kara became indignant, and didn’t hide it. She stood and crossed her arms and tried to plead with her sister to just… to stop and to just trust her.
“She owns about two pounds of it. Two ounces are in a lab in Juneau for alternative energy research. A small sliver is in Mexico City for medical testing. The largest chunk is four point six ounces, and that’s in Paris, where it’s being studied as a possible reactant to cancel out nuclear waste. The rest are all smaller than an ounce, tiny vials, in different places with a list of names of which Lena has control over who has access to any of them, and then monitors all research done to them.”
“You can’t--”
“She bought and destroyed more than twenty pounds of Kryptonite, Alex,” Kara shook her head, annoyed and hurt. “When she saw what her brother did, what he had planned to do before he was caught, she cleaned it up. She’s been cleaning it up since before it happened. She tried to stop them as best she could for a scared, young, nineteen year old could.”
“How can you be sure?”
“How can I be sure the DEO doesn’t have a hundred times that locked up in a bunker somewhere, tucked inside a bullet with my name on it if I step out of line?” she retorted bitterly. “I just have to believe it. I can’t distrust everyone.”
Her sister stared at her before turning around and hunching her shoulders and shaking her head. She made it a few steps before she turned around again.
“How long?”
“About three months.”
“Three... Three months. That’s, that’s that’s. That’s… And you never thought to tell me?” Alex swallowed and floundered with the information, the sting of it surprising her.
“To tell you, my sister, or you, my handler?”
“Kara.”
“I wanted to be sure. I’m telling you now because we… it’s not just a passing thing. I want to keep seeing her. I’m going to keep seeing her. It’s… It’s… It’s serious.”
Alex took a seat on the couch and ran her hands over her cheeks before looking down at the ground as she tried to fathom the news. A hundred of the same thoughts kept raging through her head, like a river, like a storm that pounded against the windows and made itself known above all else. Kara stood in the middle of her apartment and waited, unsure of who she was speaking with, her handler or sister, though both sat before her, and both had probably the same concern.
“Is she good, Kara? I mean-- honestly, genuinely, good?”
“She tries really hard,” Kara promised. “She’s not evil, if that’s something.”
“You’ll be careful?”
“Can you please just skip all of this boring worrying so I can tell you about the girl I am crazy about?” she begged, ready to cry because her sister wasn’t disowning her, jittery because all she’d wanted to do for weeks was have someone to talk to about it.
“I’ll never stop worrying,” Alex chuckled slightly as her sister hopped onto the couch. “And I’m not sure I will trust her either. But yeah. For a little while we can.”
It didn’t take much to get Kara rambling about anything, and it took even less, just a sliver of an open window, to get her to gush about Lena, even if it was to a less than willing recipient. Kara knew her sister, knew that it wouldn’t be the last time they argued about it, but she pushed that aside for the moment because she had a lot of feeling and confusion rolling around like drunk panda cubs in her gut, and had for the past few months without having her outlet to help her sort them out. Only then did Kara realize what a huge undertaking she’d commenced.
To her credit, Alex did her best to listen without a grimace every time Lena’s name was mentioned. She was mildly successful, though that might have been because a large portion of her efforts were spent creating a list of things to do when she went into work the following day. Background checks, security tapping, server hacking, a full dossier to be created.
But that was the handler side, and she tried her damndest to keep the two parts of her separate when it came to her sister. The side Kara asked for, the supportive, hopeful ear, that was always there.
And through it all, it wasn’t lost on Alex the way Kara looked when she talked about the last Luthor. The way she was jumping up and down, her smile the entire way to both ears and as big as she could remember seeing it. It was the look of someone completely enamoured. It was a look she never saw Kara have.
There was a blush when she told her sister about a broken appliance, and about staying up an entire night talking, and just talking, she promised, earning some teasing, and a blush followed the story about Lena making her ice her bruised eye when she blew her powers out, and another when she admitted she liked when Lena wore her hair down and those skirts. There was this… relief, almost, when Kara spoke about Lena, like she had an entire collection of essays written, and was just waiting to share them, as if she’d hoarded the entire Library of Alexandria and it was entirely about a girl.
“Have you told your cousin yet?” Alex chuckled to herself as she relaxed against the pillows, the fight and her day catching up with her will to be awake.
“Fudge,” Kara choked at the realization, her eyes growing wide.
“Let me know when you do. I want to watch.”
When Lena Luthor disappeared from the collective consciousness of the entire city, and nearly the entire world, she did not dally, nor did she waste away and let her brainpower and grooming languish into nothing. While she did try her hand at completely giving up to the whims of the world and bummed her way through a few coastal countries on the other side of the planet, it lasted just six weeks before she was opening up her own firm with the help of her father, under the guise of wanting to do it herself, so as to keep his hands off of it.
Giving up the crystal clear waters, villas, and perfect weather of the French and Italian Riviera, Lena tucked her little company away, into a place more befitting of her mood and overall demeanor. Just about a hundred miles south of Dublin, she took up in a small town and never looked back, was left alone, was not much of a spectacle.
From her warehouse, she worked and she did her best and she kept quiet about the world. It was a simple life, and she thrived in the way that one could from a kind of schedule that did not allow for reflecting on anything of consequence. She had a tiny staff, she fostered ideas, she kept her head down and tried to be happy with after what she considered her Waterloo.
When LCorp was in its fledgling status, in the process of being reborn, it did not spend much time hiring, as opposed to firing, when she held re-interviews and met with every single employee. The only hire she did make was a tiny girl who just wanted her first job in the mailroom.
Jess remembered the interview from time to time, cringing to herself when she really thought about it. Since that moment, since the move that took her out of her hometown of Metropolis and transplanted her in a new city, that brought her a new life, she thought she’d gotten close to Ms. Luthor, with close being a very relative term in the equation.
She knew the order she liked her files, the order she liked her phone calls, she knew which calls to ignore, which to hurry along, she knew which people were detested, she knew who could come and go, she knew dates and times and places, she knew credit card numbers by heart and had two rolodexes for anything she could need in the city. But despite the preparedness required for her position, Lena was not demanding, not a terrible boss. Not every boss would quietly pay for her secretary’s father’s heart surgery and give her time off to help her family. Not every boss agonized about which flowers to send a reporter.
There was a switch to things, the secretary realized, versus her first year working directly under Ms. Luthor. There were more good moods, and more days that ended earlier, some even before eight. If she wasn’t mistaken, it all had to do with the blonde who monopolized the schedule she tried so desperately to keep.
“Hi, Jess, is Lena in?” Kara asked politely as soon as the elevator dinged.
“Ms. Luthor is just finishing up a few things. She said to keep you at bay until she finished, or you’d be late for the game.”
She earned a small smile and laugh before Kara relented and gave in. Jess didn’t mind her, in fact, she really did like the spunky blonde who occasionally brought her coffee. She didn’t mind her because she was the key to having a somewhat regular life, she was the key to getting her boss out the door, and keeping her in a good mood. She was, most importantly, a well-deserved hunk of happiness that a formerly very un-happy boss once did not have, and that was something to behold.
“So it’s Lena’s birthday in a few weeks,” Kara brought up, nervously toying with the lamp before Jess stilled it as she moved it.
“Yes.”
“What do I have to do to get you to keep her weekend clear?”
“Are you trying to bribe me to alter my boss’ schedule?” the secretary eyed her cautiously. “There is only one thing that is expected of me and it is to never be disloyal to Ms. Luthor. That would include changing her schedule.”
‘I completely understand, and I will take the blame for it if she gets mad.”
“I can’t.”
“That’s why she likes you so much,” Kara smiled softly, unperturbed. “Do you think she’d like camping?”
For a moment, Jess took the compliment before the second part hit her and she couldn't help but scoff.
“Have you met her?”
They shared a look and Kara sighed before glancing at the door.
“I’m at a loss of what to do for her birthday,” she finally confessed.
For a moment, Jess looked down at her notebook, and she smiled because she’d never seen someone so worried about their girlfriend, genuinely distressed by the prospect of not having a gift or plan.
“She doesn’t celebrate it,” Jess finally sighed. “She hasn’t celebrated it since I’ve known her.” She looked up at the blonde who now furrowed and shook her head, not wanting to believe it. “At least three years it hasn’t been mentioned. Since before Metropolis.”
“Hey,” Lena breezed into the hall, balancing a few folders. “I thought I heard you out here.”
With the smallest movement, she reached her hand out to Kara’s waist and held it there as she kissed her cheek, earning a small blush. Jess couldn’t look away if she tried. It was so innocent and natural, it didn’t almost feel as if it were something. The secretary was on board with the relationship so much that she felt voyeuristic in those moments. But it was better than cable.
“I told you to stop distracting Jess when you visited. She’s just being polite,” the CEO chided her girlfriend. “Could you please fax these, and finish scheduling the rest of my trip to DC?”
“Yes ma’am.”
“I wasn’t distracting,” Kara defended herself weakly.
“Not at all,” Jess offered.
Gone was the woman who came into work in her tight dress and heels, perfectly done makeup and not a hair out of place. In her stead was someone who smiled, with tight jeans and a jersey, ready for the game she was stealing away from work at a normal, human hour, to go see.
“See? I can behave myself.”
“I’ll see you in the morning,” Lena shook her head and pushed her girlfriend toward the elevator. “Don’t stay so late.”
“Yes ma’am. Have fun,” the secretary called.
“And make sure you keep my birthday weekend clear. I am anticipating a surprise.”
“You heard,” she smiled.
“I know Kara,” the boss smiled sympathetically. She earned a squeeze around her shoulders and a kiss on her temple as the wove themselves together. “I appreciate you, Jess. Kara is the singular exception to every rule I have regarding my schedule… and life.”
“Don’t confuse her,” Kara chuckled. “I like our back and forth.”
“Fine. Ban her forever,” Lena chuckled as she was tugged toward the elevator.
Like schoolgirls, they giggled through the empty lobby. Jess sat behind her desk and leaned back, watching them in their matching jerseys and stolen kisses. Before the doors closed, she caught sight of the taller blonde, hugging her tight and kissing Lena’s cheeks.
With a sigh, she swiveled slightly and ignored the ringing phone. Come hell or high water, she had to make sure they worked, because her boss was in a mood that made her life so much easier, and for the four years she’d worked for Lena Luthor, she’d never seen her so happy.
The rainstorm lingered through the night, turning the streets into rivers and the gutters into waterfalls. Even when the sun tried to come up, the windows remained dark, dotted with the streetlight glow and the blur that the raindrops left splattered there. Clouds hung low, choking out buildings from the sky itself.
Soggy and oddly cold, Kara spent the night wrapped up with a DEO mission, as she’d been for the past week. It left her drained, and when it came to a head, she felt it all catch up with her; the balancing of the articles, the research, the mission, the girlfriend. It was a lot sometimes, but especially when one require more than the others. The rest then suffered.
That was why she ended up in the big bed in the penthouse instead of collecting a few extra hours of sleep in her own apartment. Her bed would have been empty. Lena’s had a decided advantage.
Even though it was late, the lights had been on. And still damp from her trip and night, Kara landed, and for just a moment, watched the CEO pace as she read from her notes, preparing for her annual shareholders meeting speech, making notes in margins, waving her hand as she fast forwarded herself. Kara was distracted with her lips when she bit her thumb absently. She was in love with the slope of her jaw.
Still darker than dark out, still sounding of rain and the low, distant grumble of thunder, Kara heard the alarm and woke for just a moment before rolling over and growling to herself at the imposition and loss of her warmth and human pillow.
Eyes shut tightly, the hero snoozed while absently hearing Lena get ready and move around the bedroom. She heard the pop of her shoulders, the crack of her knee when she stretched, she heard the shuffling of clothes and the sound of water hissing to life in the bathroom. None of it mattered. Kara couldn’t move from the cocoon she concocted in Lena’s absence. Her week and the night before caught up with her. She feigned alertness when she came in and earned kisses, she found a new kind of wakefulness when she found her head between Lena’s thighs, though it was gone when her head hit the pillow.
“Hey, honey,” Lena whispered, crouching beside the bed. She ran her hand along Kara’s temple and earned a squinted up face that dug into the pillow. “I have a conference call in an hour. Sleep, okay? I’ll be back in a bit.”
“Mmmm, okay,” Kara hummed.
Warm hands moved to her neck, to her back, to her shoulders.
“We have dinner with James later, and then we’re not doing anything today.”
“Let’s do nothing now.”
“Soon, love,” Lena promised before kissing her girlfriend’s forehead and earning a kiss on her hip as Kara dug into her without lifting her body at all.
“Do good out there.”
“Sleep well.”
It was an order that Kara took too eagerly. She didn’t even remember hearing Lena leave, just that the bed dipped and the warm palm was gone from her spine. It’d been too long since she’d had an adequate sleep, and too long since she’d had one that knocked her out completely, but she earned it and she took it because the sheets smelled like Lena and the bed was ridiculously comfortable, and far removed, up in the penthouse, she got to believe she was removed from the world and the city.
Some hours later, it was the sound of a vacuum that woke her. Coming out of nowhere, it clicked on and startled her so badly, she sat up in bed and gasped, clutching at her chest almost rough enough to do damage. It took a few minutes for her to understand what was happening. It took another few minutes for her to find pants on the floor and slip them on before groggily meandering into the living room to find the source of the racket that woke her up before ten on a perfect, rainy Saturday.
Shoulders square and about a good foot and a half shorter than Kara, the older woman pushed the vacuum precisely, rigidly, while an older model iPod hung on her hip and older headphones clung to her ears. Kara recognized the song that came out of them and smiled.
Clad in a well-worn grey sweatshirt and jeans, the little woman moved with a familiarity, and did not notice Kara at all as she turned off the machine and began fluffing pillows. Her little white sneakers squeaked against the floor as she moved.
Kara crossed her arms over her old shirt she stole from Lena’s work-out drawer, and though tight on her shoulders, she felt oddly even more out of place in it with a stranger in the apartment.
“Hello?” Kara tried, though to no avail. “Excuse me?”
It wasn’t until her third or fifth attempt that Kara got a response in the form of the woman gasping and jumping back, alarmed at the quiet addition to the room who sheepishly waved and tried to not look threatening.
Slowly, headphones were removed, and Kara cleared her throat, wrapping herself up tighter in her own arms under the quizzical eyes she was given and the swears muttered under her breath.
“Who the hell are you?” she accused.
“I’m… I’m- I’m Kara,” the hero offered, furrowing at the less than warm reception of the stranger in her girlfriend’s apartment. “Who are you and why are you here?”
“Kara, Kara, Kara,” the woman slowly pulled the headphones down and tasted the name, racking her brain for some trigger to a memory where that name mattered. “Lena’s Kara!”
“Um. Yes?”
“Well I’ll be damned,” she chuckled, her accent coming thicker with more words. Kara tried to place it, tried to place her. “I’m Francine. I help tidy after Ms. Luthor. We haven’t had the pleasure.”
“Pleasure to meet you.”
“I didn’t wake you, did I, deary?”
“No, no. I was just getting up,” Kara lied to spare the white-haired irish woman who turned from fierce jackal to tottering grandmother in just an instant.
“Usually, I’m not here on Saturdays. But I went to visit my son and his family in Metropolis this week, and I wanted to make up for missing,” she explained moving through the living room. “Just look at you.”
Before Kara could react, she had bony hands on her cheeks and deep brown eyes close to her own face. She felt herself bend, tugged down a good foot to the level of the housekeeper. She was suddenly aware that she hadn’t brushed her teeth and that she just woke up from a good ten hour nap, and looked it. Nothing deterred the woman though.
“Your picture doesn’t do you justice, darling.”
“Than--Thank you?” A pat rested on her cheek before she was off again and Kara was left half bent over and confused by her morning.
“Are you hungry, macushla?”
“Always.”
“Come on, come take a seat. I want to know everything. I’ll make you a good breakfast. Homemade. Lena orders out too much. I try to leave her some things. I’ve been telling her that for years now,” she prattled on as she shuffled toward the kitchen, leaving Kara little option other than to follow.
Your housekeeper is a tiny Irish elf who is cooking me a full breakfast. She typed a message to her girlfriend quickly as she took a seat at the island, no other choice, and not one to turn down a breakfast.
“I’m sorry, Francine, you said for years?” Kara caught up with the ramble of the surrogate grandmother.
“Oh yes, ever since she moved into my house in Máihle. Too thin. I made her eat every day. I don’t know what kind of cooks she had back home, but I was appalled,” she continued, digging out ingredients from the fridge. “Coffee? I’ve made some tea just a bit ago.”
“Tea is fine, thank you.”
I’m sorry! I forgot she was coming. Isn’t she great? Don’t let her scare you. She’s mostly harmless.
Never once did she stop moving. She was a freight train, and not one movement was wasted. She was efficient and did well, had done it for years. Kara liked what she was made of already.
While she cooked, Francine did her best to get to know Kara. Scraping and mixing, she asked about her work, about knowing Lena before she was the CEO, before her run away, she asked about who she was, and Kara did her best to pass whatever test it was.
By the time the plate was full and slid in front of her, Kara felt as if she was best friends with the housekeeper. By the time she took her first bite, she was in love and understood why Lena helped her move to be closer to her son.
There was something nice about being doted on. Slightly amazed, Francine cleaned up the kitchen and made a little more as the human garbage disposal almost cleared the plate. She kept up her questioning, getting Kara’s entire history, learning of her intentions, her plans, her ideas.
“It’s been a little easier, lately,” Francine wagered as she poured herself another cup of tea. “She doesn’t need as much looking after.”
“The Lena I knew never needed looking after,” Kara smiled to herself as she chewed.
“Everyone always needs someone to make them a warm cup of tea and ask them how their day was. I don’t know how, but she just became one of my own. My daughters are older, all married with their own lives. My son moved and started his family. My husband has been gone for… rest his soul, about fifteen years. I suppose I needed her to need me,” she realized, cupping her mug gingerly.
The hero took another bite of toast and surveyed her face, traced the wrinkles, the hard won lessons, the generosity, the caring. Lena mentioned in passing how much she admired the former revolutionary, how much she helped her get through starting her company, how much she hated that she thought she owed Lena. There was a kind of nice dynamic to them.
“You take good care of her, yeah?” the housekeeper turned her gaze on Kara once more, earning adjusting glasses and a clearing throat under such scrutiny. “I know you must hear what people say about her name. It’s not fair.”
“I do the best I can,” Kara promised.
“She thinks she doesn’t have a family. She does with me. She did with you.”
“I’m very glad she had you when she left.”
It was honest, but Kara earned a slight blush, one she never considered the housekeeper capable of making. So gruff and honest and kind, she just seemed beyond the ego to let something to to her head. The personification of humility and hardwork took the compliment though, because it was an important one.
“I like your appetite. Lena told me you ate a lot. I just liked that she kept her fridge stocked. Were you here that night her apartment got broken into?”
“Broke into?” Kara furrowed and pushed her plate away, finally satisfied after too much and a weird desire to break up with Lena for a tiny Irish grandmother.
“Oh yes, the apartment was torn apart,” she explained, grabbing the plate quickly.
“You don’t have to. I’ll get that--”
“You should have seen it. Couch was snapped in half! The fridge door was broken off! I even think the old vase was broken. It was an absolute mess,” Francine explained, shaking her head as she went to work cleaning up the plate.
Kara blushed ferociously into her mug. Her ears burned themselves raw when she realized what she was talking about, and her own hand in all of it.
“Oh, yes. I think she told me about it…” she lied, averting her eyes.
“Hello?” Lena called, interrupting the conversation. Her heels clicked and clacked a few times before she made it to the living room. “Hey,” she grinned, almost out of breath, when she saw Kara. “Dia duit, conas atá tú?” she turned to the housekeeper.
“Fhágann tú cailín deas mar seo i do leaba?” the Francine turned to Lena with a frown and her hand on her hip, mock demanding and shaking her head, prepared to scold with a smile. “An bhfuil mhúin mé tú rud ar bith?”
“She’d still be in my bed if you weren’t vacuuming like a crazy woman,” Lena objected, leaning down to kiss the housekeeper’s cheek, earning a pinch on her rib, measuring her weight. “I’ve told you to stop cleaning. I’ll take your key.”
“I was getting to know your girlfriend,” the grandmother defended herself, giving Kara a wink. “Is maith liom í.”
“She fed you,” Lena shook her head, turning to the hero who watched it all happen, and surveyed the pots and pans drying.
“It was really good,” Kara grinned, earning a kiss on her temple.
“Believe me. I know. Put on ten pounds living with her. Every morning, she was grabbing me for just a cup of tea which turned into a full breakfast, which turned into oh, look at that, a packed lunch, which turned into stop by my place for dinner. And then it was ‘you can’t go running in this rain, you’ll catch your death,’ which turned into dessert.”
“Oh look at you,” Francine smiled and watched the two. “Bhfuil tú sásta.”
“I am very happy,” the CEO promised with a smile. Kara looked between them quizzically. “She said I should be ashamed for leaving my bed when I had a pretty girl in it.”
“You should be!” Kara agreed.
“Sit down,” Francine ordered with her smile hiding itself as she grabbed a dishtowel and turned on the stove again. “You haven’t eaten yet. I’ll make you breakfast.”
“A family of seven, she can’t cook for one,” Lena explained, not bothering to fight. “You better still be hungry.”
“I could eat again,” Kara shrugged, earning a smile from her girlfriend.
The settled there, while the the grandmother cooked and fret and laughed and caught up with them. It’d been almost two weeks since she’d had a chance to run into her adopted daughter, cleaning quickly the week before and leaving to see her son. Lena missed her greatly, knowing full well that the excuse to clean, to be “hired” by her, was an excuse to catch up and check on her from someone who made it a habit.
Kara got caught up in it, enjoying the way Lena laughed and grew louder, the way she looked when someone cared for her. And so she sat there and let Lena rub her thigh and made a note of just another aspect of Lena that she never expected.
It was getting more and more difficult to leave. Kara knew she had to, knew that she couldn’t spend the night, knew that they had to keep a balance, and yet it was never easy. She frankly didn’t want to leave when she had so much skin on display, and she didn’t want to miss even a second of their time. Something about midnight and the dark and just being a bubble of themselves of which the real world didn’t impinge, it was addicting.
There was a quiet truce between them, to not push, to not rush, to hold the reins and pull back because if they didn’t, if they truly just jumped in, both wouldn’t survive. Kara was grateful for it. She was convinced that part of her would lose Lena at the drop of a hat, that if she made any sudden movements, the CEO would skitter away. For Lena, it was almost the same, because regardless of the hero’s huge heart, she knew that she’d lost an entire planet and as much as she thought of her future, she did not know how to have one.
All at once, both existed in a state of fear, oscillating themselves between staying and being so afraid they couldn’t imagine it working despite it succeeding better than imagined.
“Do you remember when we were just friends?” Lena wondered in the night. She chuckled at the idea a bit, still blown away at their progress. It’d be twenty years later, if she was lucky, and she’d still wonder how she got Kara in her bed.
“I do. I’m enjoying the more though. It’s been a pretty solid six months.”
“I never even let myself imagine this, that this, that more was a possibility. It’s all like a dream.”
“Me neither, honestly,” Kara confessed.
The sheets shifted as Kara smiled and hid in Lena’s thigh, in love with her honesty in moments like that, the quiet and the dark. At night, it was easier to think that they were allowed to just be them, that they could be two kids who got a chance.
“Be honest, Kara. Do you think we’ll make it?”
From her spot on Lena’s hip, Kara adjusted her glasses before she bought herself a few moments by kissing Lena’s hip, by kissing her thigh. If she ever saw something better than a naked Lena in her bed absently running her hand over her own chest, Kara was certain it’d be in whatever construct of the afterlife that was true. Nothing would be better, and if it was, she was surely dead.
“I don’t see why not.”
“Is there anything you would change about us?”
“I’d like to never leave this bed again,” Kara smirked as she ran her fingertips through Lena, earning a shift in hips. “I want more time with you. We’re so busy and pulled all over the place. But honestly, everything is going well. I think it helps that we know each other. What about you?”
Lena couldn’t speak. Instead she just swallowed and played with herself while Kara continued to tease again. Fingers slid along her, toyed with her, slipped inside her slowly earning a broken kind of moan that hadn’t expected to exist. She didn’t have any other thoughts.
“Fuck,” Lena groaned as Kara slowly withdrew her fingers, before she kissed here there, before she smiled as she took her time.
“Do you think we’ll work?”
“Not if you kill me with sexual torture.”
That was all of the urging the hero needed.
Kara felt muscles tightening, heard heart racing, heard Lena’s tiny hum and purr. It was all music to her, all encompassing and all that she ever wanted to hear. She meant to leave. She wanted to leave. She had to leave because she already slept over Lena’s just yesterday. She couldn’t go two nights in a row. And then she was there, and Kara realized she just wanted to make Lena feel good.
“Can I… Do you want me to-- I really want to--”
“I swear, Kara if you don’t-- Oh God!” Her words were stifled with all manner of language.
Kara knew she had to go, but that didn’t stop her from taking her time. She liked the way Lena tasted. She liked the way her heart beat out a jazz-like beat, all unsteady and wild and like the world was on fire. It deafened her. It urged her forward.
Hands knit violently into Kara’s hair, Lena couldn’t help herself. Frantically out of breath and body unbelievably tense before relaxing into a puddle, she moaned and saw stars.
“So, do you think we’ll make it, Lena Luthor?” Kara grinned as she wiped her mouth off on her forearm.
She couldn’t think at all to say how much she wanted it to work. Her body was cold and hot all over at one time. It was too much to fathom. It took a few minutes for her hands to unclench from the sheets and Kara’s hair.
“Goodness.”
“Lena, we’re going to be fine. We’re fine,” Kara promised, kissing thigh, and hip and stomach. Gently she climbed up the bed, peppering silly, gentle kisses on exposed ribs and stomach. “I am unbelievably excited to be doing this with you.”
“I can’t think of words right now.”
“I like this,” the hero murmured, kissing her way up Lena’s chest, finding the spot in her neck that she loved to nuzzle and hid in.
Lena’s hip adjusted and she nudged Kara’s hip slightly as she tried to get comfortable. Just a bit too heavy, she loved the feeling of Kara atop her, keeping her anchored to the bed when she was certain she was flying away. And Kara softly kissed her neck and sighed as she settled there.
For a few minutes, Kara listened to Lena’s heartbeat calm itself. She yawned and curled into the nails that finally moved up and down her spine.
“You have to go to Sydney on Saturday, right?” Kara mumbled.
“Yeah.”
“Do you want to do dinner on Friday?”
“I could be persuaded,” Lena hummed, eyes closing as she tried to memorize just how relaxed she was and Kara mad her.
For just a little longer, as tired began to make itself known, Kara allowed herself stolen time with Lena. She liked her girlfriend’s independence, she valued her own, she adored their pace.
“I should go.”
“Stay,” Lena hummed, already half asleep. She shifted and held onto Kara a little tighter.
“Two nights in a row?”
“You can’t just,” she yawned and shifted closer. “You can’t just give me an orgasm and go. You’ll give me a complex.”
Even tired, even losing the fight, Kara blushed and smiled, hiding deeper into Lena’s shoulder and neck. Hands played with her neck, gently soothing there, while another held her thigh close, not letting her escape.
“Wouldn’t want that.”
“I’m always afraid you’ll leave before I get a chance to leave.”
The words were true and tinged with sleep. Kara listened to Lena fight sleep, felt her kiss her forehead, and as warm as she was, as wrapped up as she felt, she couldn’t find tired again. It was honest, and Kara understood Lena better than she could express. Lena wouldn’t leave, and Kara was going to make sure she had a future.
“I’m not going anywhere,” Kara promised.
“Good.”
“You’re not going anywhere.”
“Sydney,” Lena muttered, turning slightly as she yawned and hummed her tired song against Kara’s cheek.
“Just there,” Kara grinned and closed her eyes.
NEXT
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Long Way Back, Part I: Down in New Orleans
Date: Thursday 3rd of August - Thursday 10th of August
Word Count: 41117
Featuring: @faye-andrews Fane, Eowyn, Beulah, Fireflies & the Nightwisp.
Synopsis: After a hectic three weeks of interrupted attempts at meetings and dates cut short Faye, Fane and Eowyn ultimate end up taking a trip down South to escape their schedules and the Springs for a while. The first day involves first time meetings and experiences with flying, truth potions, an unlikely and rather unwanted gift from a Nightwisp.
Tag Warnings: Disturbing Imagery, Murder Mention, Sex Mention, Implied Miscarriage
Fane was currently sprawled out on Faye’s bed, arms stretched out idly tapping away at his phone playing a game of snake whilst she moved about the various closets and drawers packing things up into a suitcase. His own was already neatly packed up and in the boot of his compact SUV that currently sat parked up on the drive outside, he’d booked their tickets the night before after receiving Faye’s texts about wanting to get out of town for a little bit of a break. He couldn’t blame her with how insane things had been lately. Plus, she needed to see her Gram as well and Fane wasn’t going to complain to an impromptu trip. Ryan was left in charge of the estate and dogs (he never minded considering walks gave him a chance to take his camera along), paperwork in order and anything major from work set to reroute to his phone and laptop (packed in a small handheld luggage bag with other necessary paperwork and items for the five hour flight that lay ahead).
Over two or three weeks of not having seen one another properly without being dragged in separate directions by this thing or that had left them in need of a chance to reconnect and get their bearings. Explaining why he currently lounged on her bed whilst Faye bustled around. As the snake accidentally ran into a wall ending his game Fane dropped his phone onto his chest and tilted his head aside to look at her. “Are you sure there’s nothing I can do to help?”
The last three weeks had been… long. And that was putting it kindly. Between what had happened with her mother and the Fae, the magical bullshit that had once again taken over the town (sticking her in a rather vexing situation with Freddie Watts, resident hater of all things her), her meeting with Ephram, and the general lack of any sort of real time together with Fane that wasn’t made up of a quick FaceTime at midnight, or a twenty minute coffee date between everything they both had going on in their personal schedules, Faye was wrung out. Truly and utterly done.
She’d called Fane last night after getting a grumpy Eowyn down to sleep - finally - and nearly broke down into tears.
Which is why they were here now.
“No, it’s fine really,” Faye sighed, pulling one or two more things from her closet and folding them to go in the small suitcase she was sharing with Wyn. They each had a small carryon bag as well, Wyn’s consisting of a pink backpack covered in purple unicorns, and Faye’s of her satchel that she used for teaching, which would hold her own laptop and a few personal items to take on the plane. She’d never flown before, so she was feeling slightly nervous about the trip. The Rift wasn’t charged enough to take them so far, so flying was the only other option.
She was excited to be going back to New Orleans, though the news she was carrying with her wasn’t the best. But more than likely, her Gram would already know. That’s what she did: she knew things.
After the suitcase was done except for a few small things like toiletries and what nots, Faye finally sat down beside Fane on the bed, flopping onto her back next to him. She lay with her eyes closed for a long moment, breathing quietly, before she turned her head to look at him.
“Thank you. For this. And for comin’ with us.”
With his phone resting on his chest Fane’s arms automatically shifted to rest above his head on the mattress, body stretching out a little with the act whilst he tracked her movements from the closet to the suitcase and back again. He’d had his own encounter with a certain Mr. Watts, accidentally run into his and Ephram’s wife, been mauled by imps and recorded dancing in the square (no thanks to Heilyn for that one). He wasn’t perhaps as exhausted as he could be, but getting away from the chaos for a little bit would be nice.
Being assured once more there was nothing he could do Fane merely blinked once and tilted his head back up to study the ceiling, not the most interesting of things to do. Perhaps playing another game would keep him occupied?
“Your Gram knows we’re coming right? I don’t need to book us anywhere or anything to stay right?” better to ask now rather than later he figured.
Hearing the zip of the suitcase and feeling the mattress dip under her weight nearby Fane’s eyes slid from the ceiling (boring) to Faye (by far super-mega-way-more-interesting). He didn’t speak whilst she lay there beside him, simply looked at her until their eyes met as her head turned and he waved a hand idly.
“S’no problem,” he assured casually letting his words meld as they tended to when he was relaxed “can hardly deny an invite can I? Plus, someone needs to talk you onto that plane. You haven’t got anything sharp or any liquids in your carry-on right? Put anything squeezy like make-up and bottles need to go in a plastic bag just incase they leak under the altitude and pressure… Sometimes it gets a bit messy if they go splat. Not worth the clean up” he assured his expression growing ponderous as he considered his mental checklist. “Passports and stuff? Underwear, socks, clothes, shades, shoes, chargers and did you get some hard-boil sweets or lollies for the flight it’ll help with the altitude change?” If not they could get those at the terminal but better to ask anyway.
“She does,” Faye said with small nod. “I talked to her early this morning. She can’t wait. She’s never gotten to meet Wyn in person, and it’s been five years or more since I’ve been back.” She grew quiet for a moment, turning her gaze back to the ceiling. “My Gram… she’s…” A fond smile grew on Faye’s face. “She’s… eccentric. And nosy. If she wants to know somethin’ she’s gonna ask, so… just take her in stride okay?” Faye didn’t doubt that Fane could handle the old woman’s questions, even though she could tend to be deeply personal without meaning any harm by it. Still, the last time Faye had ‘taken someone home,’ it had been her ex-husband. And her Gram hadn’t cared for him much at all. She called him a few colorful cajun names if Faye remembered correctly.
She turned her head back to Fane as he spoke again. “No, but I’ll double check. That’s all I need is to get strip-searched by security.” She gave a small huff. Flying wasn’t something she’d ever cared to do. The very thought of it made her nervous. So as Fane rattled off his list, Faye just nodded without necessarily hearing everything he said. She did hear ‘altitude, pressure, and splat’ all run together into one terrifying jumble of words, however.
She rolled over and sat up, giving his leg a pat. “You want some wine? I think I’m gonna have a glass... or four…” Pushing up from the bed, Faye scrubbed a hand through her hair as she exited the bedroom, figuring he would follow as she made her way down the stairs and into the kitchen. She found a glass and a bottle, decided better against the Merlot before putting it back and pouring herself a healthy measure of whiskey. She took a long sip, looking up as Fane entered the room.
“Sorry,” she said, looking down a bit sheepishly. “I’m nervous. If you can’t tell. They have liquor on the plane, right?” she asked around the rim of the glass.
“I’m sure it’ll be a treat,” Fane agreed his eyes closing momentarily as he cricked his neck before his eyes opened again when she spoke once more of her Gram giving her a slightly lopsided smile. “So, basically you?” he asked with a cheeky grin but the look softened “consider m’self fairly warned but I’m sure it’s nothing I can’t figure out.” Fane wasn’t really entirely sure how he felt about meeting Faye’s only remaining family beyond that of Springs, cautious for sure but also curious to learn about where she was from and her history. If dealing with her Gram was a part of that then, he’d do as she said and take it in stride.
Still, the mention of strip-searching made him waggle his eyebrows at her childishly “nah, only one who gets to do any strip-searching is me so long as you don’t have anything sharp you’ll be fine.” Perhaps he should have been a little more cautionary in his bits of advice and judging from her spaced expression he’d spooked her.
The pat to his thigh and question made him sit up shortly after her, “drinking won’t help” he cautioned warily not particularly fancying having to deal with a potentially inebriated Faye through security, gate, flight and customs. Following her from the bedroom at a more languid pace he continued speaking knowing she could hear him, “it’ll just make you feel bad and then you’ll just drink more to try and make yourself feel better and-- yeah, it’s not the best way to deal with this. Trust me,” he leaned the front of his hips against the counter whilst she poured out a whiskey for herself “nothing’s gonna happen.”
Any offer of alcohol was declined, he was driving after all and even now preferred not to dabble when in charge of the safety of other people. Maybe it was trivial but he’d always felt inclined to not test his drink-driving limit. “There’s really nothing to be afraid of. I swear… But if you’re feeling that bad, just think about where we’ll be at the end of it hm? That tends to help, just keep reminding yourself of why we’re doing this.”
“Hush,” she said gently to his teasing. Faye wasn’t sure how to feel about basically introducing Fane to her family either. He hadn’t had the actual pleasure of meeting Victoria, thank goodness, and Faye’s Gram was all the blood family, besides Eowyn, that Faye had left. She was nervous, wondering how he felt about it all. She wondered if it was too soon. If it was too much of a step. She wondered if she should just tell him they didn’t need to go to New Orleans. That they could just go to… Seattle, or something that didn’t involve her family. God, she wished she could still feel the hint of his emotions when they touched. That might give her some idea. But also, she trusted that if he thought it was too much, or wasn’t comfortable with it, he would have spoken up. Or she hoped he would have.
Nothing would make her feel worse than him feeling obligated and then things going south. Or feeling obligated at all.
Another reason she got up in search of liquid temperance.
“I’m not gonna make a fool outta myself, good lord. ” She turned as he leaned up against the counter, leaning back herself, one arm crossed over her stomach. “I do trust you. Which is the only reason I’m gettin’ on that plane and were not just Ubering there.”
She sighed, looking down into her nearly empty glass. She chewed her lip. “No. No, you’re right. It’s… it’s fine. I’m just… it’s been a really long time and so many things happened down there and I-” Faye pressed the cool surface of the glass to her lips, holding it there while her thoughts drifted just a bit. Finally, after a long moment, she said softly, “I killed someone the day I left. I meant to do it. He tried to kill me, so I made him pay for it.”
Her eyes slid to his. “I was a different person in New Orleans, Fane.” They dropped away again. “And people remember things like that.”
Despite all of Faye’s anxiety around the matter of going back home, Fane could only be considered to be lingering at the other end of the spectrum in a semi-state of tranquility. He saw no point in wallowing in his concerns or the potential what ifs. Did he hope Faye’s gram liked him? Of course he did, but there was no point in his mind in getting himself worked up into a frenzy over it either. It would be whatever it would be. Meeting family was never something he’d ever particularly gotten to the stage of with any of his past partners but some research suggested that three or four months tended to be around the time when most people in normal relationships did this sort of stuff so… If Faye wanted to tell her Gram what had happened with her mother, wanted to give her a chance to meet Eowyn then Fane would happily accommodate. Plus, she’d asked him to come with her specifically so of course he was going to go. There were no two ways about it.
Fane wouldn’t deny the fact that he was curious; learning more about where she was from would help him in turn learn more about her. So, he took it in stride as with most other occurrences recently. There was also the fact that three weeks of not having seen one another kind of sucked as well.
“I know,” he acknowledged managing a small smile at her remark about ubering. “It’s going to be fine, promise” to emphasise this point he dragged his index finger in a cross over his chest.
He watched her as she took another drink, but when she began to speak his eyes lifted attentively. “You’re nervous about going back?” Fane asked as she lapsed into silence. However, the admission that came next caused his fingers to curl ever so slightly on the countertop and he took a moment to let his weight sink over the island until his chin rested in his hands with his elbows on the island. He wasn’t entirely sure what he was supposed to say to that, and Fane debated internally on how best to approach the matter. Faye had never admitted something like that before yet the impression he had of her Fane had always had a feeling she’d crossed that line. Instead of offering words of assurance he tilted his head smoothing a hand over his chin “do you want to tell me about it?”
With her declaration of being a different person then he merely pursed his lips, but ultimately he sighed “you can’t keep running from your past forever. One day it’s going to catch up with you-- history sucks but often it’s better to confront it on on your own terms than wait for it to come around and bite you when you least expect it don’t you think?” His eyes didn’t leave her when he finished speaking, “I think that going home will be a good experience for you… But some of your burdens to bed and get a chance to see your gram, hm?”
Faye missed home. Or the place she had once considered her home. Soapberry was her home now. The people there were her home. And Fane… he was home too. There was no way around it. No way to rethink it. Wherever he was, that place was home. It had become a person, and not a place. So despite her fears and her misgivings, Faye tried to be optimistic about all of it. She had no doubt that her Gram would love Fane. She had disliked Faye’s ex so much, that the man wouldn’t even go to her house anymore after she hexed him several times for being ‘a bumbling asshole.’
The time apart had been awful. But Faye knew there were things that needed doing, and they couldn’t do them if they were spending all their time with each other, no matter how they might want to. So they had pushed through, and finally, when the town had once again righted itself, they were together again and about to go away for a few days. Faye should feel relieved.
But that was the last thing she felt. For so many different reasons.
“Yeah,” she answered. “Little bit.” And then she told him why, her hand so tight around her glass she thought it might shatter beneath her grip. Faye watched his body language, watched the shock register across his face, and watched as he processed it. That she’d murdered someone. She turned a bit, so that he would be looking at her in profile as she looked out the kitchen window. Did she want to tell him about it? “Not really. But… I think I need to.”
Again, she grew quiet, her entire body tense as a rail, wondering what he would think of her after her story was finished. “My coven tried to have me killed. Me and my husband. There was a religious group - Church of the Rising Sun - that knew what we were. Their leader, a man called Johnathan, had made it his life’s mission to weedle out the witches in the city. He didn’t even worry about any other supers - Hell, I don’t know if he even knew about them - he just made us his focus. Preachin’ his religious garbage in public, callin’ on the people to fight back against the oppression of the Pagan Witches and their Devil Worship. I’m a goddamn Baptist,” she said with a huff, shaking her head. “Or I was… But anyway… he openly threatened us. He even threatened our coven, which we ran as a small private school for girls. There were crosses set on fire in our yard. Our apothecary that we ran to make money was trashed. They even kidnapped some of our girls once.”
Faye shook her head, the anger apparent on her face. “He was an evil, cruel man. And we wanted to fight back. To get rid of him before he got rid of us.” She took another drink from her glass. “The council voted no. To stay neutral. To wait it out. To not give them any reason to target us. Though we already were. Just by existing. So me an’ him, we decided to do something about it. We’d already decided to leave town, because we wouldn’t sit back and watch everyone we cared about die if there was nothing we could do to help them. Other than getting rid of Johnathan. I guess our coven didn’t trust us. Figured we were gonna do somethin’ rash before we left.”
“They sent a Hunter after us.” Her eyes drifted back over to Fane. “He tried to kill me. Us. Tried to cut my throat.” She rubbed a finger over a tiny, thin scar on her collarbone. “So I repayed the favor.” She finished the last of her whiskey. “‘Cept I finished the job. Eventually.”
“A week later I got word that my coven was dead. House burned to the ground, with everyone inside.”
She sat the glass down a bit more forcefully than she should have. “It already did,” she said sharply. She wasn’t angry with him, not at all, just the situation itself. For not taking the initiative sooner and ridding the world of her horrible mother when she had the chance. “And more of my past is waiting back there. In that city.”
Her eyes met his, softening a little. “Yeah… yeah I s’pose it will be.” She turned to rinse the glass, effectively ending that line of conversation for now. “What time is our flight?”
Was he shocked by the revelation that had come so abruptly? Yes, but he wanted to try and understand the story that came with that. Faye wasn’t a woman to act without reason, whether it ultimately ended well or badly there was always some sort of truth or reasoning that went with it. She wasn’t a woman to simply kill needlessly, or, at least he hoped that was the case. So he settled on the counter not making a sound as she turned to look out the window.
Fane’s hips rested on the edge of the counter making no move to drift closer nor shift further away, simply maintaining his ponderous and neutral stance where he leaned upon the island-counter. As the story unfolded his lips drew into a thin line, and then into a deeper frown at the thought of what she must have had to go through. So many deeply rooted religious atrocities that she’d faced and survived, no wonder she held such loathing for the topic. He’d admittedly wondered a few times why she never seemed to mention a coven of her own, or why she didn’t seem to belong to any on affiliation but never felt inclined to ask less it stirred up unwanted memories. Though apparently he was learning about it today without even needing to prompt.
The story of this Johnathan man made Fane’s frown turn into a slight glower, looking away from Faye down to the countertop on which his arms rested. Why did people think they had any right or entitlement to treat other people this way? What had supernaturals ever done to deserve this sort of persecution? The thought of innocent children, young girls being kidnapped simply rubbed him the wrong way and Fane’s jaw tensed slightly. Looking back to Faye he saw the anger etched into her features.
The betrayal she must have felt by being turned on by her coven made Fane rub his jaw, heart aching at the thought of her suffering through that loss of trust from those she probably considered closest to her. How many times had Faye been hurt by the people she was supposed to have faith in and trust? Her mother, her coven, Chris? Even Fane was guilty in a way of that regardless of his own personal reasons for it. His eyes were drawn to the rub of the scar, the silvery line evident against her skin. And what she had to say next caused him to let out a low breath and a quiet utterance of “jesus” raising a hand to rub his eyes he pressed his palms flat to the cool surface and pushed back to a standing position. “What happened to Johnathan?” it was the first thing he’d really said through listening to her.
The sharp clink of glass on counter didn’t deter him from circling around the counter, moving over to stand beside her reaching a hand out to touch her hips and turn her to face him. “I’m sorry, I didn’t know” he murmured softly, hands slipping further around her until he drew her into a gentle hug. “You know we don’t have to go if you don’t want to right? Though maybe reconciling with what happened there will help you find some sort of closure on that.” Fane wasn’t sure whether it would, but he could only hope that there was some small possibility of her managing to do that.
Releasing her as she turned his hands fell back to his sides and Fane stepped away letting her have a bit of space, “flight’s at one, considering we’ve still got the drive, check-in and security shouldn’t be too bad considering we’ve got first-class seats which means it’s all expedited and less hanging around before we get travelling.” If there was one thing Fane hated it was hanging around with nothing to do, his restlessness led to him getting bored rather easily. Better to pay a bit extra and get a decent experience than suffer economy and long queues. “Speaking of, we should probably start thinking about sorting any final stuff you need to pack before we leave.”
Faye had been harmed enough in her life, and been the brunt of too much hatred to kill needlessly. So Fane was right. There had always been a reason. Even after leaving New Orleans, and the life she was dragged into then, there had always been a reason. A damn good one. And Faye’s powers had been useful for finding out the truth. Sometimes she was wrong, and the person didn’t deserve death. Other times they deserved it ten times over.
But that was another conversation for another night. One Faye knew needed to happen, but couldn’t stomach just yet.
It was hard enough to tell this story. Of how Faye’s trust in covens had died a long time ago. Blackwater Coven in Soapberry had asked her to join them once. Faye had turned them down. Not willing to put her life in the hands of a contingent of people that weren’t her blood. That weren’t her family. Though even that meant little these days.
So the story continued on, and Faye’s eyes closed a little as she heard his muttered exclamation. She hated for him to hear this. To see her for what she truly was: a murderer. Killing never made her happy. Did she feel like a wrong had been righted? Sometimes. Did she feel that she was saving others from harm and persecution? Sometimes. Most times she just felt numb. Her life had been marred by blood and betrayal, and Faye was tired. Which is why she was trying so hard to build something better. Something full of light and laughter and love. Because that’s who she was now. And she never wanted to look back.
“I don’t know what happened to him. For all I know he’s still there. Spreadin’ his hate and his bigotry.” She silently hoped someone had killed him, or at the very least run him out of town. But cutting off one head only meant two more would spring back in it’s place. And Faye was too tired to fight the hydra at this point.
She looked up as Fane came over, and let him turn her towards him. Three weeks without his touch had left her hypersensitive, and Faye willing moved closer, leaning her head onto his chest and closing her eyes. “How could you know?” she said, voice muffled against his shirt. “And no. No, we need to go. I need to go. You’re right: I can’t keep running. And it wasn’t all bad. Just those few things…. Big things… but there’s so much good too.”
She gave him a small smile and a nod as he pulled away, always seeming to know when she needed just a little space to deal with things. She wanted his touch, god she wanted it so badly, but they had a plane to catch. “Alright. I’ll um… I”ll wake Wynnie up from her nap in a few. Will you go through things with me one more time first? Make sure I have everything?”
There were a few odds and ends and ‘better safe than sorry’ items that Faye packed up in the end, but within the hour they were ready and on their way, Faye feeling both excited and scared of so many things, but more than anything, she felt… strangely enough… happy. And she was determined that ‘happy’ was the feeling she would hold onto for as long as she could.
The airport was crowded, and Faye held Wyn on her hip as they stood waiting to board. “Is it always like this?” she asked Fane as she adjusted the curious toddler.
They would cross the bridge of the other dark deeds littering Faye’s history when they reached them, just as Fane would gradually tell some of his own. By comparison they were rather mild, but he’d always done his best to stay in the light (ironic considering the light could also ultimately be his end). It wasn’t hard per say to hear these truths but it was hard to contrast the person capable of that to the woman he saw here in the kitchen now. Time had clearly taken its toll to dampen her hot-temper; not that it had been tamed entirely considering some of the outbursts he had been witness to thus far. Plus, she’d killed her mother didn’t she? Fane was never going to underestimate her power or drive to what ends she might be capable but it was difficult to wrap his head around. Still, this was another piece of the puzzle that made up Faye and whilst he might not agree with the sentiment of killing he could understand it to a degree.
His exclamation wasn’t at the admission to her killing people, more the story about what had happened to her coven after all he’d stayed the night she killed her mother and he’d stay now. After all, he could recognise and appreciate her efforts in trying to move on from the dark days. To lay them to bed and try to find something better, and if she was willing to let him Fane wanted to try and help her build that life for herself and Wyn, felt that she deserved that after the betrayal and hardships through which she had endured.
Fane made a mental note to look into that at some point, to see whether or not he could pull some strings to find out what happened to this Johnathan character. Whilst he didn’t typically wish harm upon others it didn’t mean he sometimes felt that way inclined. But right now? Right now he was needed here, and it was why he left his spot to circle nearer to her and give her a moment of respite in his loose hug. He didn’t answer her question because really, how could he know? “Alright, then we’ll go but if you ever feel uncomfortable about anything you tell me alright?” Shifting back to give her a serious look before he pressed a kiss to her forehead and drawing away.
When it came to giving Faye space to collect herself Fane was somewhat intuitive, his movements ebbing and flowing like the tides drawing him nearer and receding when the time was right. “Yep, I’ll meet you in the bedroom and we’ll go over the stuff.”
It wasn’t long before everything was sorted and packed away in the car, with the cottage locked up securely they set out on their way. The drive from Soapberry to the airport wasn’t too bad, considering it was the middle of the day and once they arrived there it was simply a matter of handing the keys over to the valet, unloading the bags and making their way to the terminal.
Thankfully, there were no major incidents and checking in, security and getting to the gate went issue-free. So as Faye spoke he tilted his head in her direction, “yep. I mean, it’s summer holidays as well so you kind of have to expect all this” he gave a general wave of his hand towards the people passport and boarding passes in hand.
Looking back, Faye had been angry for a long time. Until recently, when things started to change and she realized that anger didn’t solve anything. Her grief still manifested as anger sometimes, but she liked to think she had a slightly better hold now than she had even a few months prior. Nearly losing everything you ever loved was enough to make someone reevaluate their priorities. And how they were living their life. And then Faye had gotten those things back: Fane. Her magic. Her relationship with Ephram that wasn’t totally estranged anymore. Her daughter. So many things that made Faye realize she couldn’t keep living like she had been.
And while there were dark things still hiding in the archives of her personal history, things that it would be hard to talk about, and even harder to witness Fane’s reaction to, Faye would reveal them when the time was right. She just hoped that when she did it didn’t make him see her differently. Or change things between them. It was hard for her to open up as it was. And opening up to someone she cared so greatly for - someone she loved - and having them look at her with anger, or even worse, with disgust… there was nothing more heart-wrenching. At least not in Faye’s mind. She really didn’t know if she could survive having Fane hate her too.
No… she knew she couldn’t.
But that was for another time.
She wanted nothing more than to build a new life for her and Wyn. A better life. A good life. And she wanted Fane to be a part of that life. An integral part. Even now, Faye found it hard to imagine a future without him in it, though she kept those feelings tightly reined. Things were going well, and she saw no reason why they wouldn’t continue to go as such, but she kept her hopes on a low burn, lest they overwhelm her.
“I will,” she said, smiling at his kiss to her head. Anything that bothered her, she would tell him. And they would deal with it as it came.
Just as they were dealing with the crowd at the airport now. But when he assured her that this was normal, Faye relaxed slightly. It was only a few hours by plane to Louisiana, and Eowyn seemed to have no qualms about any of this, looking around and occasionally tapping Fane or her mother on the shoulder to point questioningly to something she didn’t know the name of.
Finally, after what seemed like ages, they were boarding. Faye helped Eowyn into her seat, the little girl immediately moving to look out the window, Bun still securely in hand, while she secured their bags overhead. She moved into the middle seat to let Fane put his things away, and finally sat down, scrubbing a hand nervously through her hair. “At least one of us is gonna enjoy this,” Faye said to Fane as he took his own seat. Eowyn was grinning at something outside, paying neither of the adults one bit of attention.
There was no part of his mind that doubted that he’d leave Faye and Wyn, at least not at this moment in time. Had she done terrible things? Yes, but as he always ended up circling back to the ultimate crux of the matter. It was her past and she was trying to find a new route forwards and in Fane’s books if you truly worked and dedicated yourself to seeking a better life then why shouldn’t you be given forgiveness and a second chance? The outlook was perhaps a dangerous one, one that had gotten himself hurt many a time in the past and likely would continue to do so in the future.
Yet that very belief was also the burning heart that had kept him going all this time, through the harm and suffering he’d experienced at the hands of others. It was how he’d come to terms with himself in a way, believing that if he could accept the worst in others and try to give them a second chance that maybe they’d prove him wrong. Prove that darkness wasn’t always the route a person would take. There had to be something worthwhile in the world, otherwise what really was the point in the end? So he would deal with Faye’s history when it came up, try to listen, to understand her troubles and the darkness haunting and weighing down her soul.
But for now that moment wasn’t now.
Instead, Fane assured Faye to ease some of her nerves along with happily indulging Wyn’s curiosity about the new things around them telling her the words and doing his best to help her understand where they were. She was a smart child and seemed more excited about the prospect of a holiday than her mother was, or at least the travelling process that is.
Considering their seats were first-class they were the first called to board and the space in the front of the plane compared to economy was a luxury in itself especially with his tall frame and long legs which otherwise would have been cramped up by the time they touched down again. Putting his own luggage away Fane sat down in his seat, stretching out in the leather recliner with his feet kicked out in front of him though Faye’s nervousness was palpable. Reaching out across the gap between their seats to seek out her hand he gave it a reassuring squeeze along with a look to say ‘trust me, this won’t be as bad as you think’ before his gaze travelled to Wyn who seemed taken with watching the flight crew packing the last of the luggage on board. “You should take a leaf from her book,” he joked lightly “there’s nothing to be scared of, trust me.”
Faye knew that most people wouldn’t be able to see past the terrible things she’d done. But Fane wasn’t most people. It was odd, in a way, how someone with such a dark and brutal past as Faye would come to care for the kind of man that Fane was: not without his own darkness and pain, but gentle and caring, forgiving, the kind of man who saw people for who they were, not who they used to be. The kind of man who could see Faye for who she was, not who she had been. And while the past couldn’t be changed, it didn’t define a person’s heart. It didn’t define who they were now. And for someone like Faye, that was a balm like no other. To know that he could see the darkest parts of her soul and still say, ‘I’m not leaving.’
It was one of the reasons she loved him.
And it only grew day by day.
Faye wanted to tell him, it made her heart swell even as she thought about it, but she knew it wasn’t the right time. Things like that, declarations like ‘I love you’ were something Faye didn’t take lightly. They were worth waiting for.
But back to now. This would be Wyn’s first true holiday. She’d never been out of Soapberry in her three years of life. They’d been to the beach, and the zoo, and pretty much every family-centered place the town had to offer, but never had Faye taken her daughter this far from the relative safety of Soapberry’s barrier.
Never having been on a plane before, Faye didn’t know the difference in first class versus any other class, although she would readily admit that the accommodations that Fane had gotten them were extremely nice. She’d tried to buy the tickets for her and Wyn, but Fane wouldn’t hear a word of it, so finally Faye had conceded. She wouldn’t have know where to start anyway.
Faye gladly returned his squeeze, threading her fingers lightly with his as she smiled over at Wyn. “Probably,” she agreed. “And I believe you, I just… she’s a lot braver than me. Aren’t you, baby?” Eowyn turned as her mother called her, plopping down in the seat and grinning over at Faye and Fane as she swung her feet against the leather. She made a hand signal that meant she was hungry now that her explorations were done, sitting back in the seat and looking expectantly at the adults.
“We have to take off first, and then you can eat, okay?” Faye told her.
Eowyn seemed to be satisfied by this, and promptly stuffed Bun’s ear in her mouth and went back to looking out the window.
Though he might need time to consider the things he learned, to work through them and try to come to terms with them within himself it didn’t mean he would let that be the defining judgement for a person. Fane would always give them the chance to explain themselves, did it make it right? No. But everyone deserved a chance, and when you had forever at your feet it seemed pointless not to be willing and open-minded regarding such things. Did Fane care deeply for Faye? Yes. Was it something he was willing to label just yet? Not really. If time had made Fane anything about such declarations it was immensely cautious and wary of the potential consequences of saying it too fast. For now he was content, simply knowing that Faye trusted him enough to invite him back to New Orleans; where so much of her history both light and dark existed was a testament in itself.
Soapberry was all well and good, but there was more to the world than the confinements of a barrier. History to be seen and learned about and Eowyn deserved to see that world for all its beauty as did Faye. To be shown that despite the misery she’d seen there was goodness and beauty still to be found if you knew where to look, and Fane wanted to share that with her. To perhaps give her some amount of hope that there was still some measure of good in the world.
“She’s very brave,” he agreed smiling over at Eowyn as she turned and grinned little legs swinging back and forth on the seats. Her request didn’t go unnoticed but Faye had it in hand.
Soon enough the engines of the plane stirred into life and the air-crew came out to do the safety announcement before leaving to take their own respective seats as the plane headed out onto the runway. As the plane situated itself Fane took a couple of the hard-boiled sweets and offered them out to Faye “suck on this, it’ll help your ears to pop-- no idea why but it works.”
A short time later they were off the ground, cruising up and away from the land to altitude; breaking through the layers of cloud until they emerged the other side of the seemingly endless blanket of white with the sun shining outside. The seatbelt light flashed off and Fane looked aside at Faye once more. “Hey-- so, any more tips on how to meet your gram? What do I call her? Anything else I should know?” Fane figured it would be best to distract Faye and getting her to talk to him seemed like the best course of action plus it didn’t hurt to learn some stuff. Kill two birds with one stone so to speak.
Faye had always wanted to travel, but had never really had the means or the opportunity. Her ex surely never wanted to take the time to go anywhere or save up money to experience anything other than the mundanity of every day life. It took attempted murder to get him to leave New Orleans. So this was a brand new experience for Faye. Being taken somewhere. Even if it was back to Louisiana and nowhere exotic. But Fane had already taken her to Egypt and Paris in the last eight months. Faye was still getting used to letting him do things for her. And telling herself that it was because he wanted to, and wanted to see her happy, and not because he felt like he had to or felt sorry for her in any way.
So she would take it as it came, and hopefully things would continue to just flow easily and without pretense between them. Faye took the offered candy with a smile of thanks, popping it into her mouth as she got Eowyn’s belt fastened. She gripped Fane's hand as the room off, and once they leveled out it really wasn't that bad. She unbuckled when all was safe, and smiled at Eowyn as she pressed her face back against the window, watching the clouds roll by. Faye chances a small glance out as well. “It's beautiful,” she said, ruffling Wyn’s hair and telling her to be careful before sitting back in her own seat.
“Um, well… her name is Beulah. Delacroix. So maybe start out with the usual Mrs.? She'll tell you what she wants you to call her.” Faye smiled fondly at the thought of the fiery old woman. “She hates liars and cheats and people that think they know everything. She despised my ex.” Which basically gave Fane a good synopsis of the kind of person her ex-husband had been. Before he became distant and closed off and … odd. He hadn't always been that way; he'd been a decent man when they first met, but an entirely different creature than the man sitting next to her.
“She's a witch like me, which you know. She does a lot of old magic. Root magic, they call it. And she just… she knows things. So don't get freaked out if she says something about you that's not common knowledge. She's blunt, um… honest. If she wants to know somethin’ she'll just ask.”
Faye snorted a laugh. “And she's got a dirty mind.”
If there was one thing their history already proved it was Fane’s love of travel and exploring everything the world had to offer. Whether that was architecture, history or cuisine or simply anything between or beyond those scopes. So far Faye had been adamant in limiting what he could do or buy for her and considering Fane’s penchant for big gestures it sometimes made it hard and thus he had to put more thought and effort into the plans he did pull out from his sleeves.
Hearing Faye’s remark about the sight Fane cast a look out the window, that was the thing with immortality; sometimes it took someone else pointing out the beauty of the world to trigger him to recognise it also. Sometimes the tears rolled by and it was difficult to remember to take the time to truly appreciate the simple things in life that occurred naturally. “See?” he joked giving her a light nudge “not so bad is it?” The air stewards wandered about the cabin offering complimentary drinks and fresh food; far better than anything normally served elsewhere for which Fane was thankful. Most of the stuff served on a plane was rather foul in all honesty (another perk of paying for upgraded seats).
Taking a coffee he’d ordered he sipped whilst she spoke of her grandmother taking mental notes as she recounted bits of information. “Alright, I tend to go with that on introductions anyway but it’s always good to know” still hearing what she didn’t like caused Fane to arch a brow ever so slightly. “So if that's what she doesn’t like what does she like?” Though his attention was drawn to one particular thing she said “root magic? How’s that differ -- i’m assuming it differs somehow to normal magic?”
Her snorted laugh only served to boost his grin however a mischievous light appearing in his eyes. “Oh yeah? Well, a dirty sense of humour’s the best sort of humour to have otherwise what’s the point of life? So we both share that in common.” Fane was glad for that fact at least.
Faye new Fane liked big gestures. But she didn’t want him to think that’s the reason she enjoyed being with him. It was the furthest thing from the truth, in fact. She would be utterly content if Fane was a pauper living in a one room apartment. Money didn’t matter. Nor did standing, or birthright, or prestige. Faye only needed him. Stefan Savin. And nothing else. But with time would come the realization that it was alright to let him do such things for her, just like anything else. And Faye was proud too. She would never be able to get him the grand things - for one, what else did he need? - that he had shown to her. She wasn’t destitute, but she was still paying two mortgages - one on the huge, empty house she’d shared with her husband, and one on the beach house she lived in now - had medical bills piled up from the hospital after her accident, and she wasn’t getting paid for her summer leave from the Academy. She had income coming in from Morgana’s still, but it wasn’t that much.
The thought of the bar she had once run back home made Faye smile. She would definitely have to take Fane there. It had been years since she’d seen her old friend Renee, the woman who ran the place for Faye now.
She turned to Fane as he spoke, giving him a soft look. “No. Not so bad.” Faye got a bottle of water for herself, along with an espresso, and an apple juice and a cheese and fruit assortment for Eowyn. The toddler settled eagerly into her food, concentrating on squishing the cheese bits flat before she ate them.
Her daughter occupied for the present, Faye turned back to Fane. She grinned. “Handsome men,” she teased. “Seriously though she… she respects upfrontness. Honesty. Character. Trustworthiness. Kindness. But not bein’ a pushover either. She likes people who can get things done and don’t whine about it the whole time.” She gave him another small grin. “She’s a sucker for a good accent too. Though she sounds even more cajun than me. My accent’s watered down a bit since I’ve been gone.”
Faye made a humming noise as she sipped her water. “Root magic. Conjure. Hoodoo. It’s called all sorts of name. It’s inherently an African-American folk magic though. It mixes in Native American botanical knowledge, and even some European folklore. She learned it as a girl. Would never tell me from who. It’s not Voodoo. So don’t call it that. That’s different. But it’s… powerful.”
She gave her own small laugh. “My Gram’s nearly 80. You think it’s cute until she gets a handful of your ass and blames it on not being able to find her glasses.” This was said quietly, so Eowyn wouldn’t overhear.
“Awh shucks, you’re going to make me blush” he joked winking at her cheekily. Their conversation was relatively quiet, not particularly wanting to disturb Eowyn though there were plenty of channels and games on the TV to keep her entertained throughout the flight. Still, he was interested in what she had to say and tell him about her Gram not only for his own benefit when he met the woman but because he genuinely was curious. Faye’s description put at ease any concerns he may have otherwise had considering if he ticked them off he had pretty much all of those under his belt relatively well. “Ooh, which accent though? More eastern European or this one?” Not that Fane tended to actively choose which accent he spoke with but he did enjoy watching people’s confusion when he did alternate between the two. “Is this you saying you’re going to come back sounding like a backwater wildling when we head home?”
Home. Whilst Fane meant Soapberry he’d started to feel a semblance of the word whenever he was around Faye, after all home is where you felt most comfortable, where you could take off your burdens and simply be and Faye let him do that and all the more.
“Huh, do you know what sort of folklore it incorporates?” Fane was always a sucker to learn about the practical applications of lore and history, how the facts in stories got so twisted and misshapen yet some measure of truthfulness remained despite time’s efforts to warp it. “I’m kind of curious to see it at work now” he admitted honestly.
Her next point made him chuckle drily, though he lowered his voice a little more just for the sake of propriety “I have no idea what you mean, why wouldn’t anyone want a handful of this ass? Sounds like good taste runs in your family” he teased sitting back with a small smirk curling his lips.
She grinned, a touch of pink on the apples of her cheeks. “I like them both. She probably will too.” Faye always found it amazing how Fane could switch between accents so fluidly. She loved the one he used from day to day, though it was different when he was relaxed. Not as crisp and enunciated. Though she knew part of it was the persona he put on from day to day. She’d also learned that sometimes he muttered to himself in Romanian, and she found that accent appealing when he drifted into it as well. All in all she found most everything about him appealing.
Faye snorted, sliding a discrete hand along the top of his thigh. “I’ve always been a backwater wildling, baby... “ she said in her thickest cajun French. “You gon’ lemme show you a good time, hm?” His usage of the word ‘home’ didn’t slip past her, and it softened her playful look just a bit. Home wasn’t a place, she would agree. Home was people. Family. Where you could lay down the weight of your life and let someone else help you carry it for awhile. Where you were always wanted. Always loved.
And home was starting to mean more and more to Faye every single day.
“Well, I’d have to let Gram explain it better. She’s not a practitioner, as you’d call it, but she knows how to make the spells, the talismans. It’s just… messin’ with things you weren’t born into can be a dangerous and disrespectful game. And Gram has always had great respect for every kind of magic that exists in the world.”
“It doesn’t work like my magic. It’s not something you see really. It’s more about creating things like luck, good or bad. Cleansing the spirit or finding things wrong with it. Jinxing, crossing… things like that. It’s not somethin’ you can see. It’s somethin’ you have to believe. And honestly, most of her spells she just makes up. She has her influences from certain things, like conjure and castin’ bones, but she prefers to stay away from anything culturally sensitive. She’s always been good like that.”
“Most Delacroix women have excellent taste.” Her hand gave his thigh a small squeeze, and stayed there, gently curved over him as the chatted on for a good long while.
“Guess we’ll have to see which one wins out, if she’s as blunt as you say she is i’m sure she’ll come right out with her preferences.” His attention was drawn by the slide of her hand over the denim of his jeans huffing a laugh under his breath as his free hand came to settle over her own. “Cherie, you always show me a good time I’d question the day you didn’t” and that was the truth if ever he’d spoken it. However, his teasing softened to something more sincere “but, you know that you make me happy right? That this is more than anything I could ask for…” Fane felt the need to ask just to make sure she knew how he felt.
Fane figured that perhaps talk of magic and such things would best be left for when he actually met the infamous woman. After all, if these were her domains then it would also give him something to talk to her about. “She sounds like a smart woman, I’m looking forward to meeting her.” Patting Faye’s hand lightly he gave her a smile looking over to Wyn who had found the remote and was fiddling around with the entertainment system.
The conversation drifted over various topics, from magic to stories of New Orleans to things that had went on during their weeks apart. That is until the crew came around to announce that they would be landing shortly and Fane looked at his watch a little surprised at how fast it seemed time had flown and soon enough they were touching down in the airport near New Orleans.
A trip through customs and baggage claim later Fane walked carrying their suitcases without any real fuss. “Do you have the address to get us near? I’m assuming you can direct us once we’re closer to familiar grounds.”
“I’m sure she will.” Faye had never known her Gram to pull punches. Even when it came to things that people might not want to hear. It seemed that Faye was surrounded by those sorts of people: Iann, Fane, Teddy, Ephram, Cassie. All friends and loved ones who told the truth almost always. Faye being someone who like to hide from her own truths, it was perhaps fortunate that the people she loved were so openly honest.
“Well, I'm glad I'm not boring. We all know how you don't like that, hm?” Her face was turned up towards his, tilted slightly, and she watched as his gaze softened like hers had. The words made her throat tighten, and she turned her hand over to thread their fingers. ‘I know’ didn’t seem right for her to say. Words often failed Faye when it came to Fane, and actions spoke louder than most anything between them. So she rose up just a little, enough to brush her lips across his. Her eyes closed, and her free hand rose to stroke over the line of his jaw. The kiss was gentle and light, not the deeply passionate one she longed to give him once they were alone, but it said just as much. It said ‘I know, but I love hearing you say it anyway.’ It said ‘you make me happy too.’ It said everything he had said to her, solidifying all of it between them. Faye couldn’t ask for anything more than this either. This… happiness. It was a simple word to describe what they had between them, but an apt one.
She lay her head on his shoulder for a bit when she pulled back, before turning to help Wyn put on a movie.
The flight was over before Faye realized it, so absorbed were they in talking and entertaining Eowyn.
Faye pulled out her phone as Fane asked about the address. “It’s a bit out in the country. I lived in the city, over my bar, but Gram lives out in the sticks. Still technically in the parish, but…” Faye shrugged.
Once they had settled the rental, Eowyn safely tucked in the back in the rented carseat, Faye insisted on driving. They got settled on the I-10 headed south, the GPS taking them towards familiar territory. Faye felt herself growing nervous, but also excited. It felt good being back here, if she were honest. It was hot as hell, the humidity had her sweating before they made it into the car, and it even smelled different. “I was here for Katrina,” she commented as they turned off the interstate onto a four lane state highway that would eventually turn into a two lane county road. “City was never the same after that. Still recovering.” She pointed out a few shops that were still boarded up and abandoned as they passed by, graffiti covering the plywood covering the windows.
It was not quite an hour before the two lane, which had become increasingly surrounded by thick forest and the occasional patch of wetland, narrowed. Faye slowed down, and they finally came to what looked like a driveway tucked among the old oaks and the kudzu vines. A mailbox without a name or a number sat empty beside a wooden sign painted with the words ‘Private Residence No Admittance.’
Faye turned down the drive, and they were immediately swallowed up by the trees and the thick greenery. “Guess it’s a good thing you don’t mind the woods, hm?”
“You make it sound like I have such a problem with being left with nothing to do,” he complained though by no means serious in his complaint mostly because it was an ultimately true statement. The tighter grip her her fingers around his own made him look down at them with a smile. He could tell what she was going to do before she even moved to do it and the soft passing brush of their lips and stroke of her hand made him let out a quiet sigh of contentment. Fane knew that words often tended to fail between them but he felt like it needed to be said, felt like he needed to remind her of the fact that this was more than enough for him to feel content in life. His mind still lingered a little on her confession earlier and sometimes a part of him wondered how she must feel carrying such burdensome history on her shoulders.
Eventually they were leaving the airport and in possession of their rental, and whilst the humidity was affected Faye he simply walked along relatively unaffected by the heat of the day only squinting a little from the bright glare of the sun overhead. “Fair enough,” although Fane had been planning on driving and with a bit of trying to convince her that he was okay to drive (which Faye was having none of) he eventually relented to riding shotgun and being in charge of navigation.
His interest was shared equally between the buildings they passed and checking the map just to ensure they were headed in the correct direction. “Storm shelter?” he asked as he looked aside at her a little curious, he’d never been anywhere during any major catastrophe thankfully but he’d been alive long enough to have seen his fair share of damage. It was quite a force of nature,” he agreed thoughtfully as he eyed the shops in their sad run-down state. It was a shame, but that was the cost of living in a world dominated by mother nature wasn’t it? Terrible disasters were prone to happen and for those who lived in the danger-zone it was just a risk they had to ultimately deal with. After all, what could really be done against earthquakes, volcanoes, tsunamis and tornadoes amongst other destructive tools in mother-nature’s arsenal?
As they turned towards less built up areas, buildings growing more and more sparse Fane eyed the land curiously. Where a person chose to live tended to say a lot about the person living there, so this spot relatively far from what some might consider civilisation was an interesting one to him. Faye’s remark about woods caused him to lean a little closer to the window and hum in agreement “I guess so.”
Soon enough the vines and trees receded on their approach to an old plantation styled building covered in heavy hanging ivy which covered most of the white panelling of the house itself. Upon closer inspection Fane could pick out several spots of the residence perhaps in need of a little paint and renovation (he couldn’t help himself from wanting to preserve old residences likely rich with history just as he was inclined with the smaller artefacts he dealt in day-to-day). But his thoughts were drawn by a slightly odd feeling upon approaching the residence and Fane glanced aside at Faye, “wards? Or just powerful magic?”
She merely smirked at his comment. He knew damn good and well that he grew bored easily. He fidgeted. Messed with things. Anything to occupy his attention when he was looking for something to do.
“No. No storm shelter,” she answered. “We um… we stayed in my apartment.” ‘We’ being her and Chris. “It was awful. There was… I managed to save my bar and a few of the places around us - the folks that knew what I was - from too much damage. But wards only do so much. And they were done fast. We ended up with a few feet of water downstairs in the bar. Structural damage… it nearly took the roof off. I…” Faye shook her head, not sure what else to say. “We helped as many people as we could after.” For what good was magic if it couldn’t be used to help people?
“These trees are two hundred years old or better,” she said of the oaks growing along the path. The forest had encroached on either side, but the oaks still stood unmarked except for the gray curtains of spanish moss hanging from their thick branches. When the house came into view, Faye felt a little jolt in her chest. She’d grown up here. Her parent’s house had never felt like home. Not really. She still owned it, back closer to the city, but she hadn’t been there in years. The tree her mother had tied her to and burned her still stood in their backyard, covered in char and ash and the outline of a sixteen year old girl who had done nothing wrong except for being born different.
Faye had never been able to face it again. Maybe she should now that they were here.
But right now they were here. And she felt the tingle of familiar magic as they drew closer. “Both,” she said in response to Fane’s question. The word was a bit breathless, as Faye’s heart beat rapidly in her chest. It was her family’s magic that she felt. Her blood. Her birthright. It was like stepping into warm water after being outside on a frigid winter night. Even Eowyn had gone quiet in the backseat, where she had been making popping sounds with her mouth and laughing to herself. Faye glanced in the rearview mirror to see her daughter staring intently at the house as they pulled up and Faye put the car in park.
Without much hesitation, Faye turned the engine off and got out, standing beside the open door to look up at the house in all it dilapidated beauty. A gust of wind kicked up a small dust devil, and it spun around the front of the car before fading out in a rustle of fallen leaves.
As it died, there came a sound that Faye would always remember: the creak of a screen door. She looked up towards the sound, and there stood her grandmother, looking just as she had the last time Faye had seen her, over five years earlier. The old woman didn’t say a word, just met Faye’s eyes across the small expanse of yard between them. Her own eyes were a faded violet, almost periwinkle in color. Faye let out a breath and stepped away from the car, moving forwards and up the steps of the grand old house. She stood there, not really knowing what to say as her throat tightened and her eyes welled up with tears. Part of her felt ashamed for being gone so long. Her grandmother was strong, and powerful, but she was getting older, nearing 80. She wouldn’t live forever.
“Gram, I-”
“Hush,” the old woman said nearly at the same time as Faye spoke.
Faye looked up at her, mouth set in a tight line. But her grandmother only smiled. “Hug an old woman before you go runnin’ that mouth, oui?” Her accent was as thick as Faye remembered, and it made her feel warm and safe.
A wet laugh poured it’s way from Faye’s mouth, and she stepped forwards and embraced her Gram. “I missed you so much.” She hugged her tight, and inhaled the familiar scent of cloves and vanilla as a few tears slipped down her face. “I’m so sorry I’ve been gone…”
For her part, Faye’s grandmother only made a noise that meant Faye didn’t need to apologize. “Don’t think nothin’ of it. You’re here now, aren’t you? And you brought extra.” She pulled back, giving Faye’s cheek a firm pat. “Now introduce me to my great-grandbaby and your handsome man.”
“Be nice,” Faye said sotto voice, though she was smiling.
“I’m always nice, child. Now scoot.”
Faye went back down the stairs and back to the car where Fane had taken Eowyn from her carseat. The little girl looked slightly confused. She’d only ever seen her great-grandmother over the phone. “Come on,” she told them both, taking Eowyn’s hand and leading her towards the house. Her other little hand stayed firmly gripping Fane’s.
“Wynnie,” Faye said to her daughter, squatting down next to her. “This is Grammie. Remember you see her on mama’s phone?” The little girl stared hard at the old woman waiting at the top of the stairs. “You can hug her for real now, hm?” Faye continued. After another few moments of staring, Wyn let go of Fane’s hand and walked resolutely up the stairs towards the old woman, stopping and staring up at her.
“You scared of me, pichouette?”
Eowyn shook her head.
“Good. Now give us a squeeze.” Eowyn giggled and held out her arms to be picked up. The old woman lifted her up with ease, though she muttered to the little girl about how heavy she was. “You look just like your mama did when she was a runt, hm? Not a trace of nothin’ else in there.” It was a back-handed dig at Faye’s ex, who the old woman had despised beyond belief. The comment wasn’t meant to be cruel. Just honest.
“Gram,” Faye said once she and Eowyn had settled. “This is Fane. Fane Savin.”
“I know who he is, Marie. You been talkin’ ‘bout him for weeks.” There was a glint of mischief in the old woman’s eyes, and Faye’s face turned slightly pink. Her Gram just chuckled, looking fully at Fane for the first time. Her faded eyes stared hard at him for a short moment, though her smile never faded. There was something there, something that was a warning but not quite. Something that would be settled between them before things got too comfortable. Finally, she turned back to the house, Eowyn’s happily in her arms.
“Come inside, Fane Savin. And bring my granddaughter with you.”
Fane was curious to hear the story, like all those she likely had from her time living here in the city. “I’d say structural damage is better than the alternative” considering how many lives were often lost with this sort of thing flooding and other natural damage was tame by comparison. He could tell she was starting to retreat a little and reached over to lightly touch her arm, not enough to distract from her driving but to reassure her he understood. “You did what you could, which is what counts there’s no way to save everyone in things like this…” with that said he drew his hand back.
“Nice to know I’m older than some trees around these parts then. Way to make me feel old Faye, comparing me to bark but wait-- is that you saying I’m wise? Since people claim trees to be wise” but it was all said in jest, Fane would never subscribe to such descriptions of himself especially when it was he presenting such suggestions. For all his interest in the house however, his gaze was drawn to observing Faye’s reaction. This was her home after all, even after all these years. See seemed excited by a little apprehensive, understandable considering everything.
The answer earned another curious look back towards the house, and before he knew it the driver’s side door was shutting. Fane stayed put for the time being, giving Faye a moment to gather herself and reorient with the surroundings of her home. Wyn was still quiet in the backseat, it was only when he saw an elderly woman appear he took in her appearance. Despite her age she looked well, and he could see the family traits distinctly. As Faye moved off to greet her Fane eventually got out circling around to unstrap Eowyn and get her out of the car leaving the bags for the time being. They could get them later on.
He could distinctly hear the conversation going on, but opted to attune himself to the sound of the wildlife in the nearby land rather than eavesdropping. This was Faye’s time with her Gram and he… well, he was simply here to support her however she needed him to through this trip.
Lifting Eowyn up and settling her on his hip he gave her a small bounce, “travelling was fun wasn’t it?” His words earned a blink from the toddler who finally tore her eyes away from the women and house to look back and give him an enthusiastic nod. “Maybe we’ll do it some more,” though that was said more to himself than the little one he held in his arms.
As Faye returned he set Eowyn back down on the ground, letting her grab a hold of his hand and basically drag him in tow towards the steps and woman waiting for them. The height difference between himself and the toddler meant he had to tilt a little anyways, but he didn’t mind letting her pull him along until they stopped at the bottom of the stairs.
Fane didn’t mind not being the centre of someone’s attention, for all his ability to be loud and cheerful he could just as easily fade into the background which is exactly what he did as they stopped. Instead, Fane stood and observed Eowyn’s interaction with her great-grandma his mind dwelling on what it would have been like to know his own back when they were alive. They’d passed long before his own time but it didn’t stop him wondering about them. Despite his own thoughts he was attuned to the conversation going on recognising the dig at Chris if ever he heard one but not opting to do anything to draw any untoward attention to himself not fidgeting for once simply standing a little behind Faye his hands clasped behind his back out of the way.
That is until Faye introduced him and he offered the old woman a smile, small but charming and nothing too over the top as she said she knew who he saw. “Nothing too bad been said about me I hope Mrs. Delacroix” he offered in good-humour having opted for his day-to-day accent that was mostly soft English with a very slight Eastern influence curling a few of his words rather than going to the extreme at one end or the other. Fane stood straight under her cursory inspection, neither presumptuous overconfidence nor shy just a delicate balance somewhere between the two. He could recognise the warning look he was offered, and a part of him was both curious and a little unsure quite how to interpret it. Understanding would likely come with time.
“Yes ma’am,” he answered politely when the invitation lifted the perimeter it felt like a heavy curtain being suddenly drawn back after being stood too close beforehand; allowing you to breath easy once more. It was always an odd feeling of being bound by some ancient aspect that meant he was unable to cross a private threshold without the necessary invitation but he’d gotten used to it now. Looking over at Faye he offered her his arm with a small smile before he started up the steps leading into the house following wherever Faye’s gram seemed intent on taking them whilst looking around the decoration. “You have a lovely house, antebellum architecture if I’m not mistaken?”
“I’ll leave the tellin’ of that to Marie,” she said back. “And pah… it’s Beulah. Mrs. Delacroix makes me feel like an old woman.” She cackled a little at her own joke before eyeing him and then inviting them all in. Beulah had her own intentions when it came to Fane Savin, ones she would let come to light soon enough. But for now she headed inside and to the kitchen that was down and to the right. Immediately to the front of the double doors there was a large staircase that took up much of the foyer, leading up to the second floor where it split right and left into a balcony that ran the circumference of the entranceway. There was a large hallway on the second level that went back into the depths of the house, and doors leading off at regular intervals could be seen. There was a library to the left, and a formal dining room to the right, both of which looked slightly underused and a bit dusty.
Faye had taken Fane’s offered arm, not missing the look that had passed between her Gram and Fane. But she didn’t say anything, as it seemed to settle between the two. What would happen would happen, and Faye honestly didn’t know what her Gram had in mind. She knew she wouldn’t harm Fane, never that, but she would probably test him, mess with him… to ascertain what sort of man he might be. Because Faye’s track record wasn’t the best. So she just gave him a smile as they traversed through the house behind her Gram and Eowyn.
The kitchen was just like Faye remembered, warm and full of light and hanging herbs and dried flowers. Something was already making the place smell like heaven, and Faye found that she couldn’t wait to sit down to dinner.
Beaulah set Eowyn down and the little girl moved off to explore for a moment, before coming to her mother and signaling that she had to go to the bathroom. “I’ll be right back,” she said, touching Fane’s arm as she passed by with Wyn.
“He’ll be fine, I won’t bite,” Beulah said over her shoulder as she checked whatever was in the stove, determined it needed another few minutes, and stood back up. “You two wash up. Give us two a chance to get… acquainted.” She waved Faye and Wyn off in the direction of the bathroom, and when they were gone, she turned back to Fane, tilting her head as she gave him another long, searching look. “Sit,” she said, indicating Fane should take a seat at the small table situated near the window of the kitchen. It wasn’t said in a commanding way, but merely in the way of grandmothers who expected their word to be obeyed without question. Without waiting to see if he would, Beulah moved off to another small room attached to the kitchen. The sound of rustling and clinking glass could be heard, and came back with a clear jar of something red. She snagged two glasses off the shelf and went to sit down at the table herself.
Pouring two fingers worth of the red liquid into each glass, she pushed one towards Fane. She raised her glass towards him and slowly tipped the red liquid back, swallowing all of it in one go. “Moonshine,” she explained at his quizzical look. “For good luck and a journey safely traveled.”
It was moonshine. Smelled like moonshine. Tasted like moonshine. But there was a slight hum of magic about it. Nothing malicious or harmful, merely a spell meant to uncover truth, be it of body, mind, heart, or soul. Glamours would fade, pretences would fall away, harmful intentions could be revealed if they existed. An effect much like alcohol could have on it’s own, but at a much faster and much more efficient rate. Though without the inebriation. And while it was a truth serum, at it’s core, there was no compulsion to blurt things out without prompting. Though if a question was asked, and the drinker chose to answer, it would be the truth, plain and simple. It didn’t seem to affect Beulah herself since she held no glamours, no false pretences or facades, and would always answer truthfully. She was who she was. Anyone who didn’t like it could go to Hell. Though over the years, she’d found loopholes in how to circumvent the magic, tell the truth without telling the whole truth. Omission instead of lying.
Beulah had used the drink on Chris when he’d first come to visit her. He’d been more than happy to sample ‘free booze.’ Needless to say, she had not been pleased at the outcome.
Though something told her that this one… he was different. Like day to night. She would suss him out eventually, but for now she simply poured herself another round and waited on him to join her, if he would.
Hearing Beulah repeat a sentence he’d said more times himself than he cared to count was almost ironic, “I dread to think what that makes me then but I can understand the sentiment.” Recently Fane had enough Mr. Savin’s to last him a lifetime and then some. As they wandered through the house Fane found himself looking around at the layout taking note of the different doors curiously and making a note to explore later if he was allowed not wanting to intrude in Beulah’s home or hospitality.
Fane’s eyes drifted naturally to the hob as they arrived but Eowyn soon drew Faye’s attention and her touch to his arm was met with a smile. “Ah don’t worry about it, take your time” he wasn’t sure how long Beulah’s interest would last but if the look was anything to go by. Well, he knew something was coming though good or bad was yet to be decided. He watched as Faye and Wyn departed but soon his attention was taken by Beulah’s directions. Typically he wasn’t one to take directions from other people but he saw no point in being stubborn or obstinate today. Moving slowly to take up the seat she directed him to and leaning his forearms on the table hands clasped together whilst he watched the woman bustle off to what he could only assume was a pantry; a theory confirmed by the clinking and rustling that came shortly after she vanished.
When she returned his eyes went to the jar and his expression grew quizzical, unsure what exactly it was considering red liquid tended to immediately making him think blood, but closer inspection of the way it sloshed in the jar proved it wasn’t viscous enough to be blood. So her explanation was met with a small nod of understanding, however as she pushed one towards him he smiled gratefully looking down at it taking a subtle breath filtering out the other smells of the house and kitchen to try and determine whether there was anything untoward about it. Nothing did, but frankly Fane never took a drink from someone he didn’t know or trust well enough. As much as he respected Faye’s grandma his caution ultimately won out even as she downed her own. Fane’s hands remained clasped in front of him, politely and in view but making no move to take it. “I appreciate the offer ma’am, but I’m more of a whiskey person myself plus, I prefer to stay in control of my faculties-- no offence meant” he offered her an apologetic smile hoping he hadn’t offended with his decline to her offer of a free drink but still dipped his head politely to her toast.
Fane wouldn’t have minded the spell if he had drunk the offered glass but he made a point of being honest anyway. If Beulah had questions then he would answer them to the best of his abilities. As Beulah poured herself another Fane eventually tilted his head a little “I’m sure you have questions for me” making a small gesture to indicate he was happy to answer whatever she had to ask he waited observing her patiently.
Fane would have the opportunity to explore as he saw fit later on, the places in the house that were off limits being very few. And only then because they contained things that might be dangerous. Faye took her leave, and she sat down with her drink, looking over at him thoughtfully as he politely refused.
“Got whiskey too, if you’d care for a glass?” She would get him one if he wanted it, though it wouldn’t contain the spell. “None taken. I like a man who holds himself to certain standards. Far too little of that these days, if I do say so. Plus, more for me,” she grinned, but screwed the top back on the jar nonetheless.
“‘Course I do. Though what those questions might be I’m not so sure yet.” She gazed at him, tilting her head this way and that as if trying to figure out what the best angle to look at him from was. Finally settling on a tilt slightly to the right, Beulah reached out a hand to lay gently over his own. She closed her eyes and sucked in a small breath. Her magic skimmed his thoughts like one might books at a library, getting general ideas without delving into private detail. “Royal… traveler… lover… soldier… prisoner… father… ” Her voice was gentle as she opened her eyes, but didn’t let go of his hand. “Who are you now, Andrei Alois? And why should I trust you with my granddaughters-” Her voice slowly hardened, but stayed even. “- instead of turning you to ash where you sit?” Beulah gripped his hand hard then, squeezing much harder than an 80 year old woman should be able to, and when she held up her other hand and opened her palm, in it sat Fane’s daylight ring, gone from his finger where it always rested.
Sunlight streamed through the windows of the kitchen, still bright and hot in the late afternoon. It illuminated one side of Fane’s face, as well as Beulah’s. “Speak the truth, or I let go.” She calmly indicated their clasped hands. “And we all know what happens then.”
“I’m alright, but thank you anyway-- perhaps later” that is if he lasted that long. Her remark about certain standards certainly rung true enough for him, or so he hoped. Fane held a certain moral code that he did his best to try and live up to. It certainly wasn’t easy and there were days he was tempted to break it, after all how easy would it be to simply give in to those dark urges and impulses? Too easy. Fane chose the hard route, held himself accountable when he could and tried to do as much good as he could with what he had earned in the world.
Fane sat under her inspection, observing her in kind but making no move closer or further away. Though the pressure of her hand as light as it was over his own caused him to glance down momentarily that is til she started speaking and he could sense the mild skim over the surface of his thoughts. His eyes lifted to her face levelly but still no effort to break the contact was made. He’d known enough witches to know what she was doing but where most might make an effort to resist, hide or fight the mental intrusion he simply sat and let her browse, like his thoughts were an open record collection set out in a vintage store just waiting to be picked and played. Surface thoughts were all well and good but the things deeper would take more effort to pry into if she really wanted to go looking. “I ask myself the same question most days, and honestly? I’m not entirely sure myself who I am or what really exists anymore of Andrei. All I do know is that I’m a person trying to do their best in a world where the odds are stacked against you more often than not. I’m an amalgamation of my experiences that have shaped me to the individual I am today. Good? Bad? Who knows, I prefer to let others make their minds up on who I am but I’m all those things.” His own tone when he spoke remained patient and even unrushed in his answer.
The sudden vice locking down on his hand was surprising but Fane had learned long ago to school his expression, any shock or trepidation that he might have felt simply locked down behind a mask of complacency. The sight of his ring in her hand caused his brow to arch skeptically his eyes to travel to the sun, down to the grip of her hand upon his own and then to her face trying to figure out whether or not it was a truth or a bluff. “You shouldn’t,” he stated simply not needing to be threatened to answer honestly “why should you trust a person you don’t know? I’d call anyone a fool for trusting someone outright that they just met. I could also point out that I’m sat here with you having travelled away from my hometown, my friends and both my children in order to support your grand-daughter in confronting her fears about returning here when I could have simply not bothered and stayed at home because it was an interference to my routine. I’m here because I want to be here and because I’m serious about Faye and Eowyn. There are plenty of things I didn’t have to do that I did and it’s exactly why I’m sat here now hoping to convince you I’m genuine in my intentions.”
There was no ire in his voice, death hardly scared him, he’d contemplated it a lot and his own death hardly was something that concerned him but his thoughts did go to Dani, to Sam, to Faye and Eowyn along with every other person he cared about. Ironic how not caring about his own demise was the very thing that would hurt the people he cared for the most. “You don’t need to threaten me to get me to speak truthfully, your grand-daughter’s suffered enough heartbreak for a lifetime and then some, are you really going to be the one to hurt her like that again?” his coal eyes hardened staring her and leaning forward just a little his poise confident despite the potential threat to his life being in the balance as it was his turn for his voice to grow cool, not threatening but pointed like a cleanly honed blade cutting straight to the point. If she wasn’t going to bullshit then neither was he.
After a moment he smiled disarmingly his head tilting almost daring her to do it “but yes we do know what happens then. You get an unnecessary mess to clean up, I mean ashes are an absolute nightmare to clean up and this suit? Dry clean only darling-- hardly worth the expenditure I promise.” Was it a cocky move and statement to make? Perhaps, but he was here to prove that he wasn’t about to be cowed by her threats but nor was it going to get a rise out of him either. Fane had been a diplomat long enough to know the benefits of patience and composure. Wait your opposition out, but was she really his opposition? Not really though the point was still applicable. His smile remained in place, eyes glinting in the sunlight reflecting the slight flecks of russet hidden within a statement there ‘I respect you, but I’m not afraid of you’.
“That’s all any of us can really ever do, ain’t it? Let others form their own opinions and judgements of us based on what life’s made us? The hard part comes when their opinions ain’t the same as our own.” Being what she was, Beulah had faced her own share of hatred and ignorance. People thinking she was one thing when she was most certainly not. But she’d grown used to it, and only kept people around her that needed to be there; that deserved to be.
Beulah gave a grunt of agreement as Fane spoke, his calm scepticism mixed with caution telling her a multitude of things. First off, that he wasn’t easy to frighten. Secondly, that he had been bluffed before, possibly with his life in the balance. Thirdly, he wasn’t rash and quick to act. There were other things as well, but those were the three that came to the forefront. Though should she really expect anything less from someone who’d lived as long as he had? Well… she’d seen a lot in her 80 years. Immortals who had no sense about themselves whatsoever was one of them.
“This is true,” she told him as he spoke of what he’d left behind, of not having to come with Faye, but of wanting to because he was serious about her and Eowyn. “Though intent be important too; specifically the difference between obligation and desire.” She let that comment remain, though she was able to feel the truth of what he said through their connection. Much like Faye had been able to feel him before the loss of her memory magic.
“Ain’t a threat, ‘s merely a question. Threats’re… classless.” She waved the hand holding Fane’s ring in a dismissive gesture. “But no, I don’t seek to hurt Marie more than she already been hurt. What kinda grandmother would I be then, hm? Though sometimes a little hurt now to protect from a bigger hurt… well…” She drew the word out. “Options have to be weighed.” As he leaned forwards, his voice and his gaze growing darker and more serious, a small smile tilted the edge of the old woman’s mouth.
And with his next comment, which started out as razor-sharp as the last one, and floated into something wholly unexpected, Beulah raised one eyebrow, a gesture eerily similar to the one Faye use quite often, before bursting out into a mad cackle. She released his hand, slapping her own down on the table as she laughed. Fane’s daylight ring was back where it belonged, and he was still intact. Whether it had been an illusion or if she’d really taken his ring she didn’t say. “You got balls like a mule, son,” she cackled. “On va passer un bon temps.”
“I see you two are gettin’ on just fine,” Faye’s voice came from the doorway as she and Eowyn reentered the room. The little girl moved off again to explore the kitchen as her mother came to stand next to Fane, stroking a hand down the back of his neck. “Playin’ nice?” she asked, looking pointedly at her Gram from behind Fane.
“‘Course we are,” Beulah grinned, reaching and giving Fane’s hand a firm pat. “Your boyfriend was just tellin’ me ‘bout the drive over from the airport.”
The oven beeped just then, and she made a face and pushed up from the table, her attention turned to the stove. Eowyn toddled over, watching curiously, and the two struck up a conversation, one verbal and one full of gestures and baby facial expressions.
“You okay?” Faye asked Fane sotto voice, giving his shoulder a squeeze. “I can show you our room if you want? Help bring the bags up?”
“Not much you can do then, let bygones be bygones just because other people want to stay ignorant doesn’t mean I have to.” No doubt they both had their fair share of experience with people who didn’t care to take the time to understand, Fane didn’t like it but he did his best to brush it off even if deep down it did still hurt a little. Fane felt things so much more deeply after he’d been turned, his emotions seemed to resonate to the very centre of him and whilst often it allowed him capable of great feats of forgiveness he was also capable of darker depths not that he often let himself take that route.
“Of course it is, though I would also say a decent measure of both is healthy though admittedly my desire to be here outweighs my tendency towards obligation.”
As Beulah made her statement about threats being classless his head tilted back just a little “well,” he drew the word out slowly clicking his tongue “it sounded like a threat considering you took my only means of not burning to a crisp and proceeded to present the ultimatum of me answering truthfully or be burned up.” Fane knew his logic was sound, whether she wanted to debate the point he would happily do so but that was his stance on the matter and it likely wasn’t going to budge. “Not the one I’ve heard her talking at length so affectionately about, but I guess we all do what we think is best at the end of the day for family don’t we?”
The mimicry of a motion he so often utilised himself was perhaps the clue that his risk had paid off. Sometimes you just had to go all in and hope for the best. So her laugh and slap to the table caused him to sit back ever so slightly taking a moment to check for sure his ring was there. Assured that it was he looked up with a smirk curling his lips as her laughter echoed in the kitchen. “Oh, thank you very much,” his lips pulled back revealing his teeth “but they’re really quite average.” The French was just like that which Fane had heard Faye speak when they did switch to that language and he laced his fingers together on the table “oui, je sens qu’on va passer du bon temps ensemble.”
His torso turned in the direction of the door, his slanted smirk still plastered on his lips. “What else did you expect?” his head tilted as he felt her brush a hand down the back of his neck pressing a light kiss to her arm before his smirk turned into a grin at the firm pat to his hands. “Hm, yes--” not even missing a beat he tacked on “not the most interesting of tales I’ve shared I’ll admit but I got a bit of a history lesson which is something I always enjoy being given amongst other lessons, Faye’s a very good professor.” His head tipped back to peer up at her slightly upside down then “aren’t you?”
As Beulah got up and Faye asked him if he was alright he merely righted himself and twisted to sit sideways on his chair to look at her. “Always, you heard her just getting to know one another.” Still the thought of going to find their room did sound rather a decent idea, “sure. I’ll get them from the car and then we can head up?” The suggestion was made as he rose from his chair pausing to look over at Beulah “sorry to interrupt, how long until dinner would you say? Just so we know how long we have to unpack things.”
“That’s good to hear,” she told him sincerely. “Marie would probably take it the wrong way if she thought you felt obligated. Though I guess the two o’ you probably go pretty straight with each other, hm? ‘S good. Ain’t no point in secrets. Or lies. Omission maybe, for a time, but dishonesty? Never a good idea.”
Beulah simply grinned. “But did I? Or’d you just think I did?” She tapped her temple. “I wouldn’t burn a man up that I invited in as my guest. ‘S just smoke and mirrors. Puttin’ on a face. Mostly. You should know about that, hm?” She waved off his comment about how Faye spoke about her. “Marie sees me through rose-colored glasses most o’ the time. But yes. That we do.”
She laughed, pushing a bit of hair back from her face where it had fallen out of the loose bun at the back of her head. “I’ll take your word for it, son. And yes… yes I think we will.” It wasn’t often that she got to converse in French, and she gave him a pleased grin as he spoke back to her. The dialect and accent was different, but the meaning could be reasoned out well enough.
She moved off as Faye entered, acting as if nothing untowards had just passed between them.
Faye looked skeptically between the two, before turning her attention to Fane as he looked up at her. “‘Spose so,” she smiled, petting his hair again. “Alright then. I’m glad you like each other.” Faye nodded at his agreement. “It’s just up the stairs and down the hall to the left. All the way at the end.” She gave his arm a gentle touch and went over to Eowyn. “You wanna stay here and help Grammie with dinner?” she asked, leaning to kiss the little girl on her head. Eowyn nodded an enthusiastic yes.
“Well be fine, child,” Beulah said, turning to Faye with a smile. “You go on an’ get settled. And maybe a half hour? Little less?” she said, turning to answer Fane’s question.
“Alright. Be right back baby.” Faye moved towards the stairs, telling Fane she was going up to make sure things were settled in the room, though she was certain her grandmother had already fixed everything. She headed up, her hand smoothing over the banister as it had since she could walk. The wood was slick from years and years of hands doing just that, and Faye felt herself smile. Just as she thought, the bed was already fitted with fresh sheets that smelled like lavender, and a homemade quilt done in diamond patterns of blue and yellow. Fresh towels and homemade soap were in the bathroom, and the clawfoot tub was invitingly large and deep. Even the curtains were freshly laundered, sheer and gauzy and covering the two sets of tall French doors that led out onto a personal balcony overlooking the wildly overgrown back garden, with it’s wysteria and azalea, and the lilies and irises and elephant ears that all flourished in the wet Louisiana heat. There was even a fireplace and a few pieces of firewood, though it wouldn’t be needed this time of year.
She was standing at the window looking out into the garden when she heard Fane come in and set the bags down. “One of my earliest memories is standin’ right here, watchin’ the fireflies.” She turned to look at him, the sheer fabric of the curtains playing between her fingers. “Thank you. For bringin’ me here. I missed it. I just didn’t realize how much until now.”
Beulah had the right of it as she spoke of the dynamic between Faye and Fane. “Lying just causes more problems than it solves I’ve found, plus once you start lying to one person you have to lie to other people. Gets to the point you’re juggling so many things you’re bound to mess up eventually. Truth’s truth, nothing more to it than that at least for me.”
The grin was sly and Fane merely gave a good-natured shrug “can’t blame me for being stuck fifty-fifty on the matter, I figured as much but you can never really be a hundred percent on these things.” Even so, her remark about smoke and mirrors earned a low sound of agreement “maybe so.” But Fane had his reasons for that. As his point was waved off Fane considered it for a moment before pointing out honestly “I think she needs it.” Fane didn’t say it aloud but he figured she did need that view and belief that not everyone in her family was like her own mother. He wasn’t sure how Beulah viewed the matter which is why he left that unsaid not wanting to stir the pot considering what Faye had to tell her.
“Probably best,” Fane always was bolstered by good-natured laughter and plus, with what he’d heard about her from Faye he figured that ultimately she wouldn’t mind what some might consider inappropriate or crass humour. What was the point in life if you took it seriously? Languages were something Fane happily prided himself on at least speaking them, and French was one he considered his stronger aspects. His time living in Paris accounted for something.
Getting up and tucking the chair back in Fane nodded to Beulah’s time-frame “alright then, we’ll be back in about half-an hour.”
With that, Fane and Faye went in their various directions and after fetching the bags from the car and bringing them upstairs he followed the instructions; up the stairs, down the hall to the left and to the last door. As expected Faye was already in there and he set the bags down by the foot of the bed when she spoke. The room was elegant and inviting, homely in its own way and Fane found himself taking in the small details and allowing his eyes to linger on the shelves. Eventually, Fane walked up behind her slipping his arms around the curve of her waist and locking them low on the front of her belly pulling her back against his chest whilst he dipped to press a kiss to her neck affectionately. “Think we’ll see any tonight?” he asked quietly but at her thanks he made a low sound “you’re the one who wanted to come, this is the least I could do… But I’m glad you’re happy” after all with how apprehensive she’d been it was hard for him not to worry about her. After a few beats of silence he smiled against her neck “your gram seems to like me. Good start I’d say.”
“Truth is truth. Amen to that,” she agreed readily.
She gave a thoughtful little ‘hmm’ as Fane pointed out that perhaps Faye needed to see Beulah as she did. As the kind, caring, strong woman that had basically raised her, that had taught her magic and how to be a witch. “Maybe so.” With one last thoughtful glance and snort of laughter she moved off, and dinner was coming up shortly.
Faye smiled at him as he came over, eagerly leaning back into his embrace as he wrapped her up. She hummed in pleasure as his mouth found her neck, and her eyes closed as his voice floated over the silence. “Mmm, yeah. Prob’ly. We can take Wynnie out to catch some after dinner, ‘fore it gets too dark.” Her hands crossed over his over her belly. “I know it was me, but… havin’ you here… it makes it easier. I’m not sure I could do it without you. And I’m glad you’re happy too.” The beats of quiet passed, and Faye laughed low in her throat. “Were you really just talkin? ‘Cause I know that old woman and she thinks she’s sneaky but she’s not.” The words were affectionate even as they were curious.
They stood for another long moment before Faye sighed. “‘Spose we should get unpacked for she calls us down.” Turning in his arms, she looped her hands around his neck, a playful smile tugging at her lips. “But kiss me first, hm? I haven’t been kissed properly in weeks.”
As she would likely no doubt have already realised her neck was perhaps his favourite resting place, and whenever he got the opportunity Fane enjoyed nuzzling and hiding his face away in the small crook. Breathing in the smell of lavender and incense that was so calming and familiar. He couldn't explain why, just that it felt comforting and reassuring to be pressed up against her like that. “Is there a method to it or is it literally just finding a group of them and just trying to catch them in jars?” Though most of his focus was taken up by her words and he presses his smile into the column of her neck giving her a small squeeze. “I wouldn’t be anywhere else and I’m happier than I could ever put into words.”
Fane huffed a quiet laugh against her skin at the inquisitive question into what had happened in her absence. “Yeah, we were talking and I made a great joke that seemed to be the crux to winning her approval-- see my humour does count for something.” He did grow a little more serious then “but yeah, we just talked and she asked me a few things and seemed satisfied with what I had to say. Then you turned up and interrupted” he gave her a slight nudge in the ribs “how long were you stood there anyways?”
His grip eased some as she turned though his hands remained interlocked and pressed into the small of her back. He hummed as she spoke of unpacking though his thoughts for the most part were elsewhere namely on having her here in his arms after what felt like an age without her. “Oh really? That’s a travesty, sounds like your boyfriend deserves a kick up the backside for not making the effort to kiss you properly.” His smile was mischievous as he gazed at her “luckily for you, I’m here to help change that.” Closing the little distance that existed between them Fane brushed his lips over her own before pressing forwards in a more deliberate kiss relaxing into the warmth and familiarity of her lips against his own. Tilting his head and gripping her back a little more firmly he drew her close and kissed her more deeply biting down on the irresistible curve of her lower lip.
Faye loved it when he nuzzled into her neck. Not only did it feel good to her, but she knew it comforted him as well. “No,” she said, eyes still closed. “They just float around in the tall grass and the trees. Just catch ‘em in your hand and put ‘em in a jar. Gotta be careful not to squish ‘em though. We’ll let ‘em go afterwards.” The pronouncement that he was happy set a warmth into Faye’s chest, only adding to the feeling of rightness that being here with him brought.
“She does like jokes. The cruder the better. So I won’t ask what you said,” she laughed, giving him a bump with her elbow. “And I never said you’re humor was worthless. I happen to like it, silly as you are sometimes.” She rubbed a hand over the smoothness of his arm as he grew a bit more serious. Part of her wanted to ask what her Gram had questioned him about, but a bigger part knew that some things were best left between the people that had discussed them. So Faye didn’t press him for more. “Only long enough to have to cover Wyn’s ears,” she huffed. But there was a smile in her voice.
Her head tilted back as she turned in his arms, nose brushing lightly along his jaw. “He is sort of an ass… I mean… hardly pays me any attention. I barely see him… I mean a girl’s got needs…” Her quiet laughter was swallowed up as he pressed his mouth against hers. His lips were already warm from where they’d been pressed against her neck, and the low flicker of flame that had burned in her belly for the last three weeks rose higher. She’d missed him. The few calls and texts and the one or two hastily snatched coffees hadn’t been enough. Maybe it was selfish or even greedy, and as much as she knew they both understood how busy their separate lives were, it still didn’t make the absence any easier.
He pressed more insistently into her, and Faye hummed in approval. Sliding her hands up his chest to his neck, she let out a quick breath as his teeth nipped her bottom lip. “Tease…” she said past the ache and the sting, nails scraping through his hair. She kissed him again, one hand crawling down and under the edge of his shirt to find the warm skin of his hip. They probably didn’t have time for what she wanted, what they both wanted, but they had a few minutes, and Faye didn’t plan to waste them.
“Sounds simple enough, though I guess there’s a talent to it - why don’t they fly away?” Fane had never been anywhere that had an abundance of fireflies so it was one thing he’d never tried his hand at. There was nothing that felt more right than being here with Faye, being where he was needed and more importantly where he was wanted. The thought brought a cheerful smile to his lips, this trip was definitely worth it.
“Probably best,” he muttered pressing another kiss to her neck and lightly nuzzling the skin again humming in absolute content. “Guess you’re just going to have to get used to that then, ‘cause my crassness isn’t about to go anywhere in fact I’d argue it might get worse if I’m unduly encouraged.”
Fane laughed quietly as Faye complained, “well, I have seen his ass and it’s pretty nice but I think he’s an idiot if he isn’t paying this beautiful woman any sort of attention. You’re right, a girl has got needs that deserve to be tended to by someone that clearly cares” which is exactly why Fane kissed her the way he did, because he did care and he missed her more than he would ever be able to filter through verbal displays.
There was barely any space between them, and Fane let his nails drag along the curve of her spine through the material of her shirt whilst his other hand snaked more securely around her waist removing any further space between them; allowing her warmth to filter straight through the layers of their clothes to sink into his body. “You know it,” he muttered against her lips a mischievous glint in his eyes as he gazed back at her shivering a little as her nails raked through his hair. Chancing a look at his wrist-watch Fane was distracted by the press of her lips unable to help the need such a simple act stirred in him moaning quietly. God would it be so bad if they were a little late to dinner? Probably not the best first impression to make but he couldn’t help but wonder. They could probably manage something couldn’t they? Pulling away from her kiss he ducked to pepper her jaw and neck with kisses his tongue dragging a stripe over her skin tasting the salt of her skin before he let his lips linger and suck on her pulse-point hungrily. It was almost amusing what the simple deprivation of her presence and attention could result in an almost all-consuming need for her.
She felt the tremor that ran through him as her nails scraped across his skin, so she did it again. Across his hip and the scars that arched along the muscle there, over his stomach, her hand seeking warmth and soft skin while her mouth sought out the press of his lips and the bite of his teeth. Thoughts of dinner fell to the wayside as he moved back to lave at her neck. Her hands tightened against him, a silent act of encouragement, and a small sound, almost pained, worked it’s way up out of her throat.
It felt like forever since he’d touched her, especially like this. Weeks without him in her bed had strung her tight as a bow, as he was slowly loosening her with each stroke of his fingers and his tongue. The urge to lock the door, which still stood wide open, the aroma of dinner creeping slowly up the stairs and down the hall, was strong. Because honestly, at this point they wouldn’t last long once they were able to be alone for more than a few minutes at a time when they weren’t exhausted.
As it was, Faye gave him a small push, walking him backwards towards the bed as her hands became more insistent. “I missed you…” she breathed as he bumped the edge of the double bed with his legs. “These last three weeks have been… God, they’ve been awful…”
The drag of her fingertips over whatever skin she could find had him ignited; skin boiling over in a flood of molten wildfire coursing through his veins in wake of wherever she happened to touch. She didn’t need to give him encouragement the flicker of her pulse under his lips and sounds he drew from her throat alone served to do exactly that.
Fane tended to pride himself on his patience and with most things that was the case, but when it came to wanting Faye most standards of his patience fell by the wayside or sometimes got tossed rather forcefully out the window. Of course they’d seen each other, but after the Fairy incident it left them at almost a month since they’d re-established this particular emotional and physical connection, something always getting in the way leaving them both frustrated and wound up.
He wasn’t expecting the push, and staggered a little not wanting to be parted from her but knowing exactly what she wanted by the look in her eyes. Normally he was the predator stalking his prey but right now with her bearing down on him Fane recalled the appeal of handing over control. “I missed you too,” he rasped quietly letting her back him up until the back of his knees hit the bed and he automatically sat on the edge reaching out to grip her hips not particularly caring for the state of the door or otherwise. “I bet,” he murmured his head tilting back to look up at her poised over him enjoying the sight immensely. “I’m here now, we’re here now though.”
When he sat back on the bed, Faye stepped between his knees, pressing close and carding her fingers through his hair as he looked up at her. Though he was tall enough that even sat on the bed it wouldn’t take much effort to kiss her if he wanted. “I wanted to call you up so many times,” she whispered, her thumb brushing his bottom lip. “Let you whisper dirty things to me while I brought myself off…” She pressed a little closer, her restraint waning with every touch of his hands across her waist. A month was too long. Too damn long to go without this part of their relationship. Faye was a physical person, and had always had a healthy appetite for sex, but until recently she’d been practically starved for it.
Her ex had ignored her mostly, his lapse into his own internal world leaving Faye frustrated and entirely unsatisfied in more ways than one. It left her feeling hurt, and unappealing, and lonely. Which is how her path and Fane’s had crossed ironically enough. It hadn’t been their first meeting, her and the man gazing up at her so adoringly, but it had been the catalyst. And here they were now. God, Faye could hardly believe it. It frightened her sometimes, like she’d told Iann, because it was almost too good. They worked almost too well. But Faye had committed to not questioning it. She was happy, and so was Fane. That’s what mattered.
“We are, aren’t we?” A small push was all it took and she was crawling over him on the bed, straddling his hips as her mouth ghosted along his neck. Her hair fell all around them, a wavy blonde mess, as Faye’s brain and body started to shut out anything besides the warmth of him beneath her. Hands rode up his shirt, pushing it high on his chest as she kissed a line down his sternum, warm open-mouthed kisses that left little marks of wetness across his skin. Her tongue found a soft nipple and sucked it into a hard peak as her hips pressed insistently down against him.
Dinner could burn for all Faye cared.
Whilst he was well aware of what he could do, Fane preferred to sit back and admire her which is why he did exactly that. Her whispered words sparked an almost sinful gleam in his eyes the press of her thumb to his lips a temptation in itself, still he pouted a little up at her “why didn’t you cherie? You know I would have, I would have told you exactly what to do, what I would do.” Her edging closer caused him to inhale his hands slipping from her hips around and gripping her ass possessively.
If there was one thing Fane wanted it was to make her feel desired, to remind her that she could be wanted; that she was wanted by someone. He’d made that decision a long time ago now, to passively pursue; only ever heeding her wishes and respecting whatever decision she made. Sure, it felt like sometimes it had been two steps forwards three steps back but what really could he have ever expected? At the end of the day, things had happened to work out and they were here, together, now.
The push sent him down, back hitting the bed that dipped as she crawled ontop of him his head pressing back as she sought to shove his chest up leaving his torso exposed. He hardly minded her attention, even with the multitude of marks cast into the light by the act, it was hardly anything she hadn’t seen before. His mind was entirely blank save for the warm press of her lips that is until the locked and sucked on his nipple the act causing his nails to dig into the material of her clothes as his back arched up off the bed and a needy mewl to escape him his hips rocking earnestly back against her own.
“God--- I need you, I need to feel you right now” he was desperate and no amount of her teasing would unfortunately be tolerated today it seemed.
Two steps forwards and three back would have been an apt description, especially when Fane had needed to leave after the month of memory spells raged through the town. Faye had thought him gone forever, and even though they had written once or twice - an outdated way of communicating, she knew, but so much more personal than a text or email - it had seemed very dire indeed.
And then he’d come back. And though neither of them had truly known what to expect when he’d come to her house that night, it had ended with them both tangled together in her bed, the last several months finally rising to a peak that could no longer be put off or denied.
And here they were now. If she believed in a benevolent God, Faye might have thanked Him. And she’d never come closer to praying in her life, not since she was a little girl, than when she’d seen him standing on the beach that night, an illusion of her heartbreak. Or so she’d thought.
But he had been no illusion. Just as he wasn’t right now, arching beneath her as her mouth tugged him into a state of near desperation. His hands tightened on her hips, and he pressed against her, the words ‘I need you’ falling from his mouth in a desperate rush of air even as her hand slipped down to the waistband of his jeans. “I want you so much…” she breathed, ghosting her lips across his other nipple, sucking it into hardness as she had it’s twin. She’d just dipped her fingers towards the rapidly hardening flesh beneath her when suddenly:
“Dinner’s done you two!” her Grams voice called up the stairs. “Come on down.” And that was it.
Faye looked at Fane, her cheeks flushed, lips swollen from kissing him, and her fingers just millimeters from where she wanted them, and let out a frustrated groan, before falling bodily on top of him. “It’s not fair…. It’s not fair at all…” she mumbled grumpily into his neck, making a small pained noise as her hips tilted into his once more time. “I’m gonna die…”
His words weren’t simply ones of desperation, his claim was a moment of raw and pure honesty. He didn’t just want her, he needed her, like a junkie needed their fix except his addiction was the witch currently pinning him to the bed and he never wanted to come down from this euphoria. Yet, he’d begin to notice how every moment without her left an ache in his chest and his thoughts more often than not turning towards her.
Fane still felt guilty about what had happened during that time but it had, ultimately, come to a head that had led them to the very situation they were in now. He’d hoped that perhaps they’d be able to finally steal a moment, but instead, found them both interrupted by a dinner call.
Of bloody course they were.
The pressure of Faye sinking down above him and pressing to his chest caused his own hands to leave her and petulantly throw themselves over his head, eyes screwed up and a groan of protest to leave him. “What deity did I piss off to deserve this?” he muttered, hearing Faye’s own protests muttered in kind to his skin.
The press of her hips earned another groan of protest “you’re gonna die? No, I’m gonna die I can only take this so many times-- bloody hell” his head fell aside on the mattress his body aching from her previous attentions. “I swear, at some point I’m going to have my way with you and lock you up in the bedroom for a week at least” he declared even if it was unlikely that such a thing was ever going to happen. But she wasn’t the only one capable of being dramatic when denied something they wanted.
Faye needed him too. So much that she was starting to forget what it was like to not have him in her life. Had she not been so tightly wound, so openly desperate for his touch, and for him as well. For him, warm and real and making her heart swell with each passing day. For Faye, wanting him, while not the same as need - even though she needed him… God, she needed him like she needed air, or sunlight, or the blood in her veins to keep her alive - was one way she could show him how she felt. Especially as words escaped her so often.
And being apart had been hard. Some might say she was needy, and maybe she was, but let them try living without color, or taste, or sensation… and see how much they needed it then. That was how Faye felt, in part, when Fane was gone. Colors weren’t as bright. Food tasted bland. Sensations were muted. Eowyn brought out the life in all these things, and Faye would never deny that her daughter made her very, very happy… but the love she felt for Eowyn was different than the love she felt for Fane. And Faye would never be able to put it into words, so she didn’t try.
“I think they all have it out for us,” she grumbled. “Just pick one.”
“Only a week?” she said, sounding disappointed, but smiling into his neck anyway. “I was thinking more like two or three… a month even. Even you might get tired of the things I’m gonna do to you by then.” His dramatics didn’t bother Faye at all. She was prone to her own, and as the both of them were Leos, respectfully, they fully embraced the occasional histrionics of the other. Within reason. Sometimes they needed to be taken down a notch, told to calm down or take a breath, or just to hold their damn horses, but mostly the mutual dramatics went off without a hitch.
Faye lay there for a moment longer, just breathing him in. “‘Spose we should go down, hm? ‘Fore she comes lookin’ for us like a couple o’ teenagers.”
He snorted a laugh at her grumble, deciding that as much as he wanted someone to blame he wasn’t going to chance pissing anyone else off even a hypothetical deity from ancient texts and stories. Better safe than sorry. You never knew what existed in this world after all.
“A month? What about a hundred days?” he asked tilting his head to look at her a little “like the Romans just… less treacherous and more hm, lecherous?” Fane suggested with a chuckle rather proud of his turn of phrase no matter how dumb it might be. “Plus, I don’t think I’ll ever get tired of anything you want to do to me, and anyways who says you get all the fun of doing things to me? Maybe I want to return the favour?” They both had their tendencies and that was simply a fact of the matter, it caused its issues but they dealt with them as they came up. After all, most of the time they took each other’s dramatics more in the vein of humour rather than genuine severity.
“I feel like a teenager who just got caught in the middle of a romp right now,” he grumbled in kind before heaving a sigh “but I guess you’re right.”
“A hundred days of debauchery? What sane person would say no to that?” Faye gave his ear a nip for his efforts at humor, though she laughed anyway. “Return away. I’m yours to do with as you please.” The thought only served to make Faye feel more frustrated than ever, so with a monumental effort, she pushed herself up and off the bed, turning to the mirror on the wall to make sure she didn’t look too ruffled. “Remind me to tell you about the time I actually did get caught,” she grinned over her shoulder. Holding out a hand, she helped him up and helped him sort himself as well, before they both headed downstairs.
Dinner was good. Roasted chicken, baked potatoes, fresh greens and an assortment of steamed home-grown vegetables, along with fresh bread, wine for the adults, and milk for Wyn, left them all full and sated. They chatted about Soapberry, and Faye’s job, Fane’s too, and talked about Wyn and what she was doing in school. Faye didn’t bring up her mother yet. She wouldn’t. Not around Wyn. Besides, she had a feeling her Gram knew. She always knew.
After Faye insisted on doing the washing up, she found the others as they had milled around waiting on her. “You ready to catch some lightin’ bugs?” she asked Wyn, holding up a glass mason jar with holes poked in the top for air. Wyn nodded readily, and took her jar. “One for you too,” Faye grinned as she handed one to Fane. “Since you’ve never in your entire life caught lightnin’ bugs. Or you can call ‘em fireflies. Whichever.”
They headed out onto the back porch, where it was wide enough to hold an outdoor patio set and a porch swing. It ran the length of the house, and was covered by the balcony of the second floor. The back garden was overgrown. Vines and flowering brambles were everywhere, running over the iron fences that still encircled it on the outer edges. Here and there a statue stood out from beneath the flowers and the bushes: fairies and fauns, the occasional angel and woodland creature. Though despite the wildness, it seemed tended to, in a roundabout sort of way. The plants flourished, their leaves green and thick; the flowers were vibrant and smelled like heaven, and the trees surrounding the entire space, with their overhanging branches and curtains of moss, seemed almost to breath quietly in the warm night air.
There were paths in varying combinations of grass and stone leading all around the garden. In the very middle stood a gazebo, alongside a small pond filled with colorful fish that would change hues if you watched long enough.
Faye took Wyn’s hand as they walked out into the grass. “Look there. See that?” She pointed to where spots of bright yellow seemed to float about on the breeze, flashing slowly on and off. “You gotta catch him easy,” Faye mimicked closing her hand gently around something, “and then put ‘im in the jar, okay? It’s their butts that glow.” Eowyn giggled at this, but then set her sights on a low flying spot of yellow before heading towards it. Faye smiled, watching the little girl for a long moment before turning to Fane. “Come on… your turn.”
“That’s the point, no sane person would say no to that” though the nip to his ear made him huff again tilting his head back in an attempt to get away from her knowing that any more of such attention would make it very hard to go back down to dinner. As she shifted back he stretched out before sitting up pulling his shirt back down despite its rumpled state. Smoothing a hand through his hair he laughed as he got up to sort himself out “oh I will.” With a glance in the mirror and a cheeky slap to her ass he followed her out the bedroom.
Fane knew that Faye would tell her Gram in her own time about the occurrence with her mother and saw no point in bringing it up, so he indulged in idle conversation enjoying the chance to get to know the little part of Faye’s blood family that remained. Feeling obliged to help clean up with Faye considering the effort that must’ve gone into preparing their meal he insisted rather obstinately about assisting her and between the two of them got the job done rather speedily. And soon enough they were on to the next activity of the evening. Taking the jar he held it up curiously trying to figure the logistics of putting fireflies in there without them flying out the next time you opened the lid to deposit the next one. He’d figure it out but it seemed a tricky task.
Following with the jar tucked under his arm Fane admired the gardens, knowing that throughout their stay here he was bound to end up walking and exploring them in the bit of time he might happen to find to himself here. The garden was charming in its own rustic way, like the house he found and as they stepped down into the grass he observed whilst Faye explained what you had to do. Eowyn was off almost immediately when she spotted one and Fane hung back watching the toddler wander about scooping and depositing the insects into the jar with a fond smile. At Faye’s mention of it being his turn he looked dubious but unscrewed the lid peering about for a particular spot before he waded out into the grass mimicking Faye’s movements earlier to scoop the insect out of the air and put it in the jar before putting the lid on. The process repeated, though occasionally between him scooping one out of the air and trying to put it in the little blighter flew off again earning a slightly irked look every now and then. “Why don’t you give it a go?” he called after a little while turning to look over at her whilst cradling his jar of luminous insects in the crook of his elbow.
Faye had been content with watching Eowyn catch her little jar of bugs, her Gram following along and helping her from time to time, and watching Fane’s pretty good first attempt. “Alright,” she said with a smile, moving off towards the center of the garden where the little flickers of light were thickest. She took the lid off her jar and tucked it beneath her arm, turning in a slow circle as her eyes tracked an insect that was flying close by. With a practiced hand, she reached out and cupped it gently in her palm, opening her hand over the jar and dropping her prize deftly inside with a little bump against the rim. It promptly fell to the bottom of the jar, unharmed. The aerated lid was placed over it and Faye moved on to her next catch.
A half dozen lightning bugs later, Faye was near the back of the garden, trying to get one more that had eluded her thus far. She almost had her hand around it, hovering in the air near the large, overgrown greenhouse that nestled in this particular corner of the area, when something caught her eye. A flicker of blue, distorted by the haze of old glass. “Ohh,” Faye said, stepping carefully down from the stone block she’d been standing on. Her eyes never left the place where she’d seen the shimmer of color.
It came again, quite suddenly, from inside the glass walls, and Faye let out a breath of excitement. She chanced a look for her Gram and Eowyn, wanting to show them as well, but they were back up near the house, too far to signal unless she yelled. And that would scare it. But Fane was closeby. “Hey… come ‘ere,” she said, the excitement evident in her voice as she was already carefully opening the door to the greenhouse.
“Have you ever seen a nightwisp?”
It took Fane a while to get a hang of the methodology behind catching the insects but the more he tried the easier it became. Still, when Faye joined the effort and rather expertly started catching fireflies he merely rolled his eyes and tsked “look at the pro, in her element. Did they have firefly catching competitions when you were a kid?” Fane joked lightly as he watched her wander around. “Please tell me there was and they had a firefly trophy to go with it.”
He’d ended up wandering a little towards the pond, curious to take a look at the fish in the water when he heard Faye’s excited breath. Her conspiratorial tone didn’t help matters either in terms of his curiosity and he offered her a quizzical look as she brought his attention to her… discovery?
It was only when he followed her gaze he noticed the odd luminescence coming from within the greenhouse its pale silvery blue light refracting off the glass. Soon enough the fish were abandoned for an exploration of the greenhouse though Faye’s question didn’t ring any particular bells. Magical creatures or aspects with the exception of dragons (which to his very very great misfortune had yet to prove existed, not that he was discrediting this because just because there was no evidence didn’t mean they couldn’t still exist somewhere) really weren't in his memory bank. His mind wasn’t a steel trap and Fane relied on the logs and journals he kept to remember the important details of his life; all safely stored back at his estate. So, unless it was some entity of mythology - take the Manticore for example or even the Minotaur Fane really couldn’t help very much without prior research.
“Nightwisp?” he echoed curiously following her into the greenhouse “no-- never heard of it.”
Broken glass - from a few missing ceiling panels Faye realized as she looked up - littered the dirt and gravel floor of the greenhouse, along with the remains of several long-dead palms, withered ivy, and various other dead and rotting plants and flowers. It obviously hasn't been used properly in years, though Faye remembered it flourishing with life at one point in her youth. Just more evidence that her Gram was getting older, and less able to keep up with things like she once had.
Their feet crunched over the detritus as they moved slowly inside, and Faye made a mental note to be careful around the shards of glass that were still hanging on to a few cracked side panels. The blue light flickered from deeper inside, and Faye followed slowly, turning to look at Fane over her shoulder. “I saw one once when I was a girl. But it was in the woods. I liked it so much I learned to make bluebell flames to mimic it.”
She ducked beneath a fallen beam from the ceiling. “Watch yourself,” she warned, motioning to the sharp edges still attached to the wood. Not that Fane wouldn't be able to heal, but it would still hurt. And she didn't want him suffering because she was careless. “Nightwisps are of the ether. The places between places. If you should happen to capture one, or better yet befriend it, they can lead you safely through any danger. A burning house. An enchanted forest. The deepest, darkest part of anywhere that exists in any world. They'll lead you safely through.” Faye paused as the little creature shimmered through the corridor in front of them, smiling sadly. “The only catch is they give up their life force to do it.”
Faye looked back at Fane, her expression telling him that she'd never dream of capturing something so rare and beautiful. “But they can also see the future. Or a version of it.” She walked on, following the glimmer of blue, until a few feet later they came to a round room with a dried up fountain in the center. Faye stopped.
“Do you see it?” she asked Fane.
The shards caught the moonlight filtering through from outside like remnants of a shattered star, glittering and reflecting the light amongst the dirt underfoot. A rather beautiful duality if thought about in terms of the contrast between the shimmering light amongst the dark turf beneath. “I’m sure this place was a sight when it was complete” Fane remarked lightly dragging his fingers along a worn wooden countertop on which some flowers still bloomed. Fane both loved and hated places like this because it always stirred in him the urge to want to help, to conserve and take things back to a state where they could truly be appreciated. Yet, there was also a beauty in the display of time shown here; every weather worn panel and chipped window with its own unique story to tell if a person was willing to listen or look closely enough. Even so, things shouldn’t be forgotten to time. During their stay Fane would ultimately end up occupying any free time he did have with cleaning up the greenhouse if only a little; removing the broken glass and replacing some of the window panes nothing major but enough to make a little difference-- a thank you to Beulah for letting them stay but also an act of kindness he hoped she might appreciate.
“You should show me sometime, that is if you don’t mind” Fane was aware of Faye’s fear of fire and would never ask her to do something she might feel uncomfortable doing but he couldn’t help his fascination with her displays of magic.
His hand came up in a protective fashion as he ducked similarly under the beam minding some of the loose stones underfoot “mind your stop” he didn’t particularly want her turning an ankle in here either. He listened curiously to her explanation of what Nightwisps were and his own expression grew to mimic her sadness. He knew the toll it took to ask someone or something to give up its life-force for some greater purpose (if using it for your own benefit could even be considered a greater purpose), that guilt would be something he would always carry with him. Now, Fane tried not to make such sacrifices anymore but do his best to find some alternate solution to them.
The reached an open room the glass ceiling curving up in panels to form a single domed roof through which the moon could be seen clearly. Yet the illumination of this room came not from the pearly luminescence overhead but the orb-like celestial spirit floating a peaceful path around the edge of the fountain shimmering wisps of silver and dusty celeste trailing in its graceful journey. Fane was about to open his mouth to answer her question but as though the Nightwisp sensed their presence the orb seemed to still its journey before it shot like a comet arcing across the domed ceiling, its traverse reflected in the glass above as it descended towards them both circling once, twice, three times before it stilled a few feet or so away swaying smoothly from side to side.
“Who is it that disturbs my voyage here this very night?” the soft melodic voice vibrated through the air an empyrean quality to its tone that resonated through the nearby glass. It was a tone of no comparison; one that was ancient yet new all at once, all-knowing yet ever-learning, friendly yet distant and left Fane both curious and speechless all at once.
“It was. I learned a lot in here. What flowers could heal. What plants could poison. I grew up inside these walls.” Faye looked around sadly, mirroring Fane unknowingly as she drug her fingers over the dusty tabletops. “I think Gram has some pictures somewhere of when it was complete. Though don’t be surprised if she subjects you to photos of me as a child too before we leave.” Faye’s voice was fond, though the overtone of sadness was there too. The greenhouse was slowly fading away, as everything did with time. If Fane helped restore it… Faye and her Gram both would be overwhelmed. Because it wasn’t only preserving the beauty of something old and antique, but preserving the good parts of Faye’s childhood. But Faye didn't know his thoughts, and they continued on.
Faye watched the loose stone underneath as Fane pointed it out, ducking and moving around pieces of fallen wood, and the occasional branch from the trees above that had fallen through the glass. They entered the circular room, alive with soft, blue light, and Faye’s breath left her as she finally saw the Wisp as it arched in a silent streak over their heads, leaving trails of shimmering light that faded in and out as it moved and swayed. It was reflected in Faye’s plum-colored eyes and mirrored in Fane’s darker ones.
And then… and then it spoke.
Faye let out a short sound that was part amazement, part surprise, and part wonderous laughter, but she quickly put her hands over her mouth, not wanting to frighten the little creature. But it didn't seem afraid. If anything it was cautiously curious, and the glass vibrated gently with the ethereal resonance of the Wisp’s voice. As it questioned her, Faye dropped her hands.
“Faye,” she said quietly, pointing to herself. “And Fane Savin.” She touched Fane’s arm, though she still looked at the form of the Wisp. It was still swaying gently, trailing liquid stardust that left a shimmer in the air before fading out.
“Hello Faye Savin. Hello Fane Savin,” it said, addressing them both in turn, pulsing gently in time with its words.
“Oh… no… no, I’m not Faye Savin,” Faye said quickly, feeling her cheeks flame as the Wisp misunderstood her. “I’m-”
“Are you not Faye? And is he not Stefan?” it asked over her protestations, sounding confused.
“Well… yes,” Faye said, frowning, “but-”
“And are you not here together?” the Wisp continued in it’s calm, gentle voice.
Faye let out a breath through her nose. “Yes, but-”
“Then you are Faye and Stefan Savin.” The Wisp said with one final pulse, satisfied with it’s logic for reasons unknown. “Why are you here tonight, Faye and Stefan Savin?”
Faye looked at Fane, a slightly helpless and apologetic expression on her face. Though something bright and hot and unnameable flickered through her as the wisp called her by a name that was not her own. It frightened her in its intensity, so she pushed it back, focusing on the question that had been asked of her.
“I… I saw you,” Faye said, turning back to the Wisp even as her eyes lingered on Fane for a moment before following. “From the garden. I remember seeing one of your sisters as a child…”
“Yes. I know. But why are you here?” the Wisp asked again, swaying back towards Fane.
The thought of a younger Faye wandering about, picking leaves and roots to crush them together into spells made him smile though it was tinged with sadness. “Well,” he breathed drawing the word out “I want to know every part of your life-- the good, the bad, the ugly so I hope she gives me that opportunity to get a glimpse of what your life was like here I’m looking forward to it.” As they wandered through the derelict corridors Fane made his mind up, any spare time he had whilst they were here he’d dedicate to helping do whatever he could to make this place rendered safe and secure for Faye’s gram.
Fane wasn’t often left awestruck, but right now it seemed like his brain had short-circuited and any speech capabilities had utterly failed on his behalf. A part of him was tempted to take a photo but eventually figured that might be rude and so his phone stayed where it was. He glanced at Faye as she let out a breathy laugh admiring the sight of her features illuminated by the soft celeste glow, the colour of the light turning her eyes a dark shade of lavender, if the NIghtwisp had stolen his words the sight of Faye in that moment left him breathless.
As it spoke, Fane turned back smiling as the little orb swivelled in mid-air to momentarily face him when Faye introduced them both and he almost laughed as it greeted them both individually his eyes sliding over to Faye noticing the heat colouring her cheeks; a sight that did make him chuckle softly.
The Wisp’s logic was sound, and Faye’s protestations only made him shake a little in silent laughter raising a hand to press to his lips to stop any sound from coming out. There was also a slightly warm feeling at the implication the name seemed to hold and the Wisp’s certainty in giving it. Like it knew something that neither of them would know at this moment in time. The prospect was both a terrifying and fascinating one, though it was the weight of Faye’s gaze on him sobered Fan. Enough to stop his laughter and after rubbing a hand over his stubble he let his hand drop back to his side.
As the Wisp swayed back towards him Fane admired it for another second. “We were curious” he answered honestly, “I’ve never seen a Nightwisp before.”
“And now you have, though curiosity is often a dangerous thing Stefan Savin” it answered once again buffed by unseen and unfelt forces, “do you have need of me?” The question sounded like it presumed to know their intentions, that it expected them to be no different than the others of their kind who met a Wisp and took advantage of its gifts.
“Yes, I have and yes, that’s true” he acknowledged patiently “but how do we learn without taking that risk?” Though, the Wisp’s next question made Fane’s eyes widen, shaking his head “oh no-- no, I don’t have need of you we just-- wanted to see you.”
“There are plenty of ways to learn; books, media, but you speak of life Stefan Savin and those things cannot teach you the value of life. Remember though, to hold dear what you care for.” The Wisp pulsed slowly, “if you have no need of me Stefan Savin why are you here?”
Fane blinked again, “um-- I-- really did just want to see you, I didn’t mean to disturb you and if I did I apologise for that.”
The Wisp stayed silent pulsing gently as though taking stock of the integrity and truth to his words before it drifted closer circling left around his head before coming to a stop after a single full rotation to stop in front of him. “You may stay Stefan Savin,” the Wisp finally spoke turning towards Faye once more “and you Faye Savin, why are you here?”
Faye smiled even though he couldn't see her. “Well, I guess the good thing is that the part of me that’s here is mostly good. Not a lot of bad memories, other than comin’ here when I was runnin’ from somethin’.” Running from her mother’s hatred. Literally. Out her window and through the streets into the woods, barefoot and in her nightgown. She'd show up muddy and tearful and crawl into her Gram’s bed and her Gram would pet her hair and rock her to sleep even when she got older.
This place was one of only a few where she felt completely safe. And to preserve it would be… it would mean more than words could express.
The Wisp dance slowly in the air, and Faye was so entranced that she didn't see Fane’s expression as he gazed at her. It was a rare thing indeed to feel a moment of pure, unfiltered joy. And that was what Faye felt, and what her face showed. At least until the Wisp misunderstood and Faye blushed fiercely. Fane’s expression was full of humor however, as she turned to him a bit helplessly, and that eased her embarrassment just a bit.
The Wisp dipped towards Fane then, and Faye watched as they spoke to one another: the immortal and the timeless. It was her turn to be left breathless then, as she watched the ethereal light play over his features, casting them into soft relief. He looked… beautiful, and Faye was well and truly enraptured. She also knew she would likely never see something so rare again in her lifetime. So she watched and listened, motionless, as the Wisp gave its own council, and asked its questions in a voice that slide like silk and honey and wind chimes over the blue-black surface of the greenhouse.
Fane's answers pleased the little creature, and Faye watched with a mixture of fear and excitement as it curled towards her and asked the same. She didn't correct the name, since her earlier efforts were futile. Who was she to question a being that had existed for eons anyway?
“I was curious as well, and wanted to see you,” Faye answered honestly.
“You have seen us before. That is the truth. Why again?” The blue light tilted slightly, as if it was looking at Faye curiously.
Fsye swallowed. “I… because you're beautiful. And gentle. And I remember… how I felt such… joy, when I saw your sister. I wanted to feel that again.”
“We remember you, Faye with the violet eyes. As we remember all. Know all. You have changed since that day, but yet you haven't. Do you have need of me?”
“No,” Faye shook her head quickly, her voice catching even as she smiled. “I just wanted to remember that feeling.”
The Wisp made a small noise that sounded like a contented sigh. “You have joy. You need not seek me to find it. But this is also the truth,” it said of Faye's words. There was a moment where the Wisp grew still, and its light seems to almost turn inwards, as if it was having a silent conversation with something Faye and Fane couldn't see. Faye looked at Fane, a question on her face, but the light flared bright once more.
“We shall give you a gift, we have decided. Since you are kind and truthful and need nothing from us. If you wish.”
There was no sort of fear or trepidation in him when he spoke to this entity, viewing it simply as an equal; another that knew some of what it was like to carry the burden of eternity. Though he wasn’t sure whether they experienced things in exactly the same way considering this creature held no corporeal form but more one made up entirely of energy. Yet, unlike him with a memory that was prone to forgetting lest he write things down this creature claimed to be able to recall all that it and its kin had seen. Fane was left to wonder what sort of burden that was, to always remember and never forget.
He grew quiet once more as Faye spoke to the creature, a melancholy smile present on his lip as he stood there, hands moving to clasp idly behind his back. Much like his own answers seemed to please the little creature it seemed to pulse more brightly as it spoke to Faye seeming to understand their intentions were not to ask it to give up its life-force for anything. Fane merely gave a shrug in response to Faye’s look whilst pulling a face that essentially said ‘hell if I know what it’s on about’.
Faye hadn’t mentioned anything in the way of gifts, and if he knew more Fane would have realised that this was an extremely rare and barely documented occurrence among encounters with Nightwisps. The sudden flare of the light caused him to wince a little raising a hand to shield his eyes but answered its offer. “You need not gift us anything um-- do you have a name?”
There was a vibration which chimed through the air like the tinkle of distant bells but so much more pure than that as the Wisp laughed. “You may call me Karina, and that is precisely why we have decided to bestow this gift to you both.”
With that there was a sudden explosion of blue-white light from where the Wisp was previously, the air in front of them fragmenting into blazing shards of crystal that spun, interwove and expanded to form a window like surface in mid-air like a miniature television screen. The Wisp danced and darted around his shoulders bouncing, rolling along its own whimsical path a bright celest trail drifting in its wake with ancient runes seemingly interspersed in the stream of energy being roped around them. He looked a bit confused as it proceeded to loop around Faye and complete the circle with the window.
Energy pulsed through the looped connection which pulsed with growing intensity before the world seemed to erupt and he was drawn mind and soul to focus entirely on the window. The surprise of the strength of the suddenly established connection drew a quiet gasp from him before images flashed across the screen one after the other in a snapshot progression.
Fane saw them both wandering familiar streets of Paris, Italy and countless other cities, them back at her cottage, his estate laughing and shooting up a storm with nerf guns and water-fights, hide and go seek in the long winding corridors, a blonde Eowyn giggling joyously whilst riding on a pony, the stream of tears down both their faces as he was forced to choose one family over another, himself with a golden aura that engulfed his body and exploded from his eyes and mouth hieroglyphs ever-changing and shimmering with a life and power of their own in the aura which clung to his skin...
The rush of emotion with every reel played out was overwhelming and Fane was forced to reach out, grabbing Faye’s hand and squeezing it like a lifeline whilst the dark depths of his eyes reflecting every flash of potential futures unwinding and twining themselves together in a snapshot collage of what life might or might not hold in store for the both of them.
Faye had never heard of Nightwisps bestowing gifts. She had always heard that they were Seers, but she wasn’t sure what that meant. Her Gram could See, but it wasn’t a gift that one could call on at will. It just… happened. Like it had the few times Faye had Seen. It was frightening, and she didn’t care to repeat the experience.
But there was nothing about the Wisp - Karina - that frightened Faye. As she’d said, the only thing she felt was joy, and as Fane declined the offer of a gift, Faye nodded in agreement, taking a step closer to him. But before she could speak, the Wisp pulsed brightly, and the world around them exploded in a glittering sea of glass and light. Faye felt more than saw the Wisp dance around her own body, for her eyes were locked on the growing crystal display in front of her.
For someone who had spent their entire life wielding the power of memory and thought, the magic forming before them drew her like a beacon in a storm. White hot and yet cold as ice, the trails of magic looped around her and Fane, and when finally the connection was sealed, she felt the tug that, had it been physical, would have sent them to their knees. As it was, Faye found herself feeling like she might collapse as the images formed in front of them. She saw everything Fane did, felt everything he felt.
And Faye knew that it was future being played out before them, possibility after possibility, both good and bad, happy and agonizingly sad, each flux of the timeline showing what might be and what may never come to pass. It held Faye enraptured, even as tears streamed down her face.
She saw an apartment in the city (it was Paris, she knew), rain on the windows and her and Fane on the couch. Faye was sleeping, her head in his lap as he typed lazily on his laptop. There was a house in the country, surrounded by fields of lavender and bright blue skies. There was Eowyn running after a pack of dogs in the wildflowers, laughing and calling to her mother in a crisp, perfect French, her fairybell voice high and clear. Faye raised a hand to her mouth.
The images fluttered again, and they once again showed Faye and Fane. They were in a doctor’s office. Heilyn was there, looking at them with an expression Faye couldn’t read. Fane looked shaken, and Faye looked pale. The image changed again as she got up and left the office. It showed the two of them again except this time they were in his bedroom at his estate in Soapberry. Faye was walking back and forth across the floor while Fane perched nervously on the edge of the bed, watching her intently. The image of her turned, and the real Faye sucked in a breath as she saw the curve of her stomach, heavy with child just as they moved forwards again.
Faye felt like she couldn’t breathe as the images kept coming. Her holding a screaming newborn to her chest as Fane leaned down over them, pressing a reverent kiss to the child’s dark, still wet hair. And again, though this second child had light hair like Faye. And once more, a third miracle blessing their family. The joy was nearly too much, and Faye felt her knees grow weak. But the magic had ahold of them, and neither could go far. It was fortunate, for what came next snatched all the joy from Faye’s arms, from the weight and living warmth of a child had carried and given birth to. She was knelt in a pool of red, crying out in agony and despair as the life’s blood of her child bled out of her. The image of Fane and the golden light that bled from his own body superimposed itself over the image of Faye raging at him in a gray mist of rain and stone markers, blaming him for pushing too far, for messing with things best left alone, for caring more about immortality than his own family. The real her cried out at the pain that ripped through her womb and her heart.
But then it was gone, and even more images shimmered into existence. Faye growing older, Eowyn growing up, graduating from school, her brothers and sisters alive and flourishing. Falling in love with Noel, Shivonne’s son. Having a family of her own. Faye and Fane at her wedding, and then… the faded gray of a memorial stone inscribed with Faye’s name, Fane’s arm around Wyn’s shoulders as she held the hand of a dark haired little girl that looked just like Noel.
Faye couldn’t take it… it needed to end. Magic had it’s price, and the price of the Wisp’s gift was in the knowing. And in the not knowing. And in the feeling. She begged for it to stop even as she wanted it to keep going, face streaked with tears of joy and tears of sorrow.
A bonding in blood, a life bound with another, a marriage that wasn’t a marriage, but was so much more than that: a bonding of souls. Of the essence of life. Wyn growing up, Faye staying the same… grand-children, great-grandchildren…
A younger her, fresh-faced and new. No scars, no violent past. Only a violent present, as the bruises on her face and arms showed.
She couldn’t remember when Fane had taken her hand, only that he was holding on for dear life. Faye held on too, threading her fingers tightly with his as all the years of their lives, of every life that could ever be or would never be, flashed before them.
There was no way to cease or block the overwhelming tidal wave of emotions that came crashing down anew with every shimmer of the images as one sequence faded into another, one potential thread stringing itself to the present; forging a new potential reality with its own joys, trials and tribulations. Often Fane was able to keep his emotions in check, but the violent wrenching slide of his emotions from a bone-deep sorrow, pain and guilt all the way to the euphoric high of meeting their first child was more than enough to smash through any of his typical guises.
He wanted to look away but couldn’t bring himself to tear his eyes away, tears streaking down his face and dripping off his chin as the futures played out in front of them. The sheer force of the darkness and sorrow over the loss of a child hit him unexpectedly forcing him to literally suck in a breath and back away. The price his fear for the unknown date his own sanity would slip away costing them; paid by the blood of their own child, a choked sob caught in his throat as he shook his head more tears dripping down his face. No, that couldn’t be right.
As fast as it appeared it was gone and he was presented of images of Faye and himself (ever the same) whilst she grew older and older. The sand running out as she aged in front of his eyes, moments showing other’s judgemental gazes on her for dating a younger man and his efforts to try and stop the looks, even going to the lengths of dying parts of his own hair grey to look older than he was. The sight of her tombstone cementing his desire to never want to waste a single moment of their lives that they had together. He watched as people said their respects: Eowyn, Leo, Alexandra, Adrian for their mother, Noel, Iann, Tuah, Teddy, Sam, Dani all ultimately leaving until only Fane remained. Only when he was alone did his melancholy expression shatter, falling to his knees in a fit of sorrow and pain that felt like his heart was being ripped to pieces in his chest whilst colour bled once more from the world turning it grey and lifeless without her there to find the colours to paint them in.
Then there was a younger her, coincidentally bumping into one another at the Louvre (he’d recognise the gallery anywhere) and the grey bleakness shifting to a melancholy soar like a bird finding its wings after being grounded for so long. Trying to help her escape her violence, doing everything in his power to protect her, to keep her and her memory safe… The confusion and new love that blossomed there.
Eventually, the images slowed fading to the gardens at his estate at a family barbecue; an older Dani and Sam happily married, two children of their own whilst Faye and Fane sat sharing a bottle of wine watching Eowyn manipulating fire for Noel who looked justly unsettled, Leo demonstrating flares of his light magic which Fane observed on cautiously a peregrine falcon swooping down to settle on the teen’s shoulder, Alexandra who looked like a younger version of himself but with her mother’s eyes messing with an orb of water that she accidentally lost control over ultimately soaking a Capuchin Monkey which hung close nearby and looked incredibly peeved after getting soaked. Finally, there was a blond haired boy tossing about a ball of shadows cheerfully where he lounged on the grass nearby.
The images finally splintered and shrunk, the silver light fading until only the soft blue glow of the Wisp remained along with a heavy silence. Fane’s eyes screwed up and he sniffled a little turning to wipe his nose on his sleeve feeling a bit pitiful for being such a mess but unable to help the way his emotions felt well and truly wrung out. His mind whilst still reeling from the things they’d both just witnessed wasn’t concerned for considering his own feelings instead adjusting the jar he’d cradled in his arm before pulling Faye into a crushing hug pressing his head into her hair and breathing her in deeply needing to reassure himself of her solidarity right here, right now.
Hugging her though only proved to make him shake as another wave of unbidden emotion rushed over him, making him sob silently as he clung to her. Not even paying attention to the Wisp as it gradually circled up and up, spiralling out of a broken window pane into the night leaving them alone in the green-house.
The feeling of being overwhelmed but still unsure of which emotion to latch onto washed over Faye as the blue light faded away. As did the images both good and bad, joyous and heartbreaking. Faye was breathing hard, like she’d been running from something intent on sinking it’s teeth into her flesh. She blinked as the silence settled in, loud as ever, and wiped at her face with a trembling hand, her other still clasped firmly in Fane’s. She would probably be bruised tomorrow, as hard as he’d been holding on to her, but Faye didn’t care. The thought hadn’t even entered her mind. It was too full of wave after wave of raw emotion… and she was left floundering in their wake.
As if they’d both shaken off the paralysis of the Wisp’s magic at the same time, Faye turned to Fane as he pulled her towards him. Her arms wrapped around him, curling around his back and up over his shoulders to dig into his flesh, finding the bend of his neck to bury her face in. afraid of what would happen if she let go. She sobbed too, great heaves of her chest as she pulled him in, held him to her, tried to take away the pain and the sorrow that she knew he felt, just as she did. There was no denying it. But God… the joy. The joy was probably even more painful than the sorrow. Especially holding her son, their son… there was nothing like it in this world or the next. And it was the joy of that and all the good the Wisp had shown them that Faye clung to as she held Fane close, the happiness that she wanted to remember, wanted him to remember. For it was only a glimpse of what might be or might not be, and as wrung out and spent and utterly shaken as she was, the Nightwisp’s gift was something Faye knew she would never take for granted.
Fane shook in her arms as he sobbed silently into her shoulder. She’d never seen him cry in the year she’d known him, and what he must be feeling to cause him to drop the facade, to let his emotions and his pain carry him away… Christ, she loved him. And it took everything she had not to say it yet. Because it wouldn’t be fair. Their emotions were too raw, bleeding too heavily for her to add the weight of the word ‘love’ to the wounds.
So she just held him as they both cried, whispering words of comfort and assurance that she had him, that she wasn’t going anywhere, and that she felt it too.
That wicked sting that was the price for joy, and the price for pain.
And that no matter what happened, no matter what path their lives took in the echoes of time, she would be right there beside him. Always. As long as he would have her.
Whilst Faye breathed heavily it seemed like Fane’s had ceased entirely; seizing up in his chest and unable to escape by any means. If he had happened to hurt her he would heal any damage he’d done later, though neither of them realised it quite this moment.
Her arms curled around him and Fane’s body instinctively pressed closer, burying himself away in the dip of her shoulder whilst she hid her face away in the curve of his neck. The wet, hot heaves blew against his skin as she cried and that only made his own tears flow faster torn up over how much he felt. The potential outcomes, the possibilities were in flux and ever changing; they might not get any of that or they might get all of it… Who knew? As much as Fane wanted to think on the happiness he felt, the joy of their children his mind was stuck on one particular track; one which had ripped off the bandage wound tightly over a hurt that had yet to go away or heal. The sight of her anguish, her pain as she raged and yelled at him because of the loss of their child. That guilt destroyed him, ate him up from the inside out like a corrosive poison eating its way through his flesh and made him burn with self-loathing.
Because it reminded him of Silas. His son that never was, and that acid; burning its way through the dams and walls he’d tried to build up around these emotions were breaking down right now and no matter how hard he struggled to try and patch those holes there was no getting to them all. The pain exploded, fresh and raw leaving him feeling stupid and pitiful and weak. He always was the strong one, the one people relied on to keep his cool but he was struggling day by day.
It took a while, to let his emotions run their course for his shoulders to stop shaking and his eyes to screw up as the tears finally began to slow her murmurs and reassurances filtering through gradually. He sucked in a deep breath then, filling his lungs with incense, salt and lavender before a final shudder wracked his body. Eventually, Fane mumbled a quiet “sorry” against her shoulder. “God I’m so sorry, I’m so sorry” the fear of himself doing something so monumental that it would lead to the suffering they’d seen… It petrified him to the core.
It was hard on him, she knew, to be the one that carried everything for everyone. Or tried to. To be so strong for so long. To want nothing more than to shoulder the burdens for the ones he loved, and ease their suffering even just a little. And as much as Faye admired and respected and loved that part of him, she knew that eventually, no matter how strong and resolute something was, there was a point where the weight would become too much. Where even the strongest rock would break.
Fane’s weight had finally become too much. And he broke. Faye's arms moved to encircle his neck as he found comfort in her own, the hot splash of tears wetting her skin as she held him tight and stroked his hair and pressed gentle yet firm kisses to his face. “Hey… hey, no. Don't be sorry. Please, baby, don't be sorry.” She didn't pull away yet, even though she wanted to look at him. Instead she nuzzled against him, her hands tightening in his hair even as tears and small sobs still shuddered through her as well.
“There's nothin’ to be sorry for. None of it was set… not the good, or the bad. I had… If anythin’ I'm the one who's sorry. I had no idea this would happen… I swear.” There was a pause, and Faye knew he was likely dwelling on the darkest part of what they'd seen: the loss of a child. Because in truth she was too. This time she did pull back. And took his face in her hands. Her thumbs traced his cheeks, brushing away the tears before kissing him gently, reverently. He tastes like salt water. “I know you,”’she told him. “I see you. Not some vision of what may never ever come to pass. You would never hurt me, or our-” Her voice broke, and her eyes closed as she took a shaky breath, but when she opened them there was a tiny smile on her face. “Our children.” The word made her heart flutter in her chest, and she could still feel the weight of their son, Leo, as she held him to her chest. “If by some… some miracle they ever do exist… You would never hurt us. I know this. I know you. I-”
Faye’s throat closed up, the words ‘I love you’ once more about to slip from her mouth. “I know you, love…” she said instead, unable to stop herself. “Don't let this hurt you. It's one of a million possible outcomes. And I would never blame you, okay? I swear it. And look at the good… I saw… we saw our family, Stefan.” She pressed her forehead to his, and there was a smile behind her tears. “There's joy in that glimpse, even if it never comes to pass.”
He sank into the comfort of her touch, every passing kiss her lips grazed to his face or rake of her fingers soothingly through his hair. The assurances did little to ease the clenching fear that gripped him right in that moment, because he was sorry and felt every ounce of guilt his counterpart felt. He wanted to swear, that whatever led to that future… He’d stop it but that was the thing about knowing the future; in trying to prevent it there was no guarantee that you were walking straight into that possible outcome.
Faye’s apology made him shake his head ever so slightly against her shoulder, “no-- it’s alright, you didn’t know.” His voice when he finally found it was thick with emotion, struggling to keep it even from the weight of the emotion carried through the words. He didn’t want to pull back, but eased his hold enough to let her do so and as she took his face in her hands his shoulders hunched staring blearily down at her; a far cry from how he normally poised himself. Their kiss was fleeting, barely a passing brush before she was speaking again and he tried to calm his racing mind as she spoke.
There was no helping his fear over the potential of what might come to pass, “but what if it does-- What if it does?” he had to ask the fear making his voice shake in trepidation of the potential what ifs hovering over him. “I could feel your pain your grief and the guilt… oh my god it’s unbearable” he shook his head “I never want you to feel that, to experience that but what if it does?” The fear was plain to read in his expression, the question left unsaid what if you end up hating me?
But then she spoke of their children, their possible future… And he quietened some and as the name she opted to call him registered his throat worked, adam’s apple bobbing from the emotion and sheer warmth that came from hearing her say that. She’d said it before, but in a state of fatigue that he wasn’t entirely sure what to make of them but now? He hugged her again then, pressing his forehead to her own and brushing his nose against her own “they were so beautiful” he eventually breathed some measure of happiness finally beginning to replace the sorrow as he thought back to the glimpse of their potential family.
Faye could see the fear and the agony and the guilt written all over his face. And she wanted more than anything to take it all away, to see him smile. To see him laugh. To see his eyes light up with joy again. And she would have known right then, if she hadn't already, that she wanted to spend what time she had left in this world making him happy. But still, she couldn't deny his fear, or what he was asking, knowing that it had as much of a chance of happening as anything else they'd seen in the Wisp’s crystal-blue mirage.
“If it does…”she said firmly, the muscles of her jaw tightening at the still fresh memory of the agony they'd both experienced, “then we’ll get through it. You and me. Okay? I promise. I felt it too… everything you felt. I felt your pain… I still feel it.” She shook her head, a few fresh tears slipping down her cheeks. “I know you would never want that. I know you'd never hurt me. Us.” Meaning their family, be it fantasy or one day reality. “And I could never, ever hate you. Or blame you. Anger? Yes. Maybe. But… not hate, never that.”
He seemed to settle some at the mention of the possible family they'd seen. The three children that were of his blood, her blood. That they'd made together, and that she'd carried in her womb and given birth to, with Fane by her side the entire time. Though it wasn't like that month of memory, thank whatever deity was watching. It wasn't a remembering of something that had already been. Faye didn't know if she could have handled that, and something told her that Fane most certainly wouldn't have been able to. Another small mercy. No… it was a glimpse. And like all things, there could not be light without darkness.
She closed her eyes as he pulled her in, huffing a wet laugh against his cheek. “They were...” she agreed, her voice thick with the sheer overwhelming emotion of it. No thoughts of it being too soon, or too much, or too serious entered her mind. All she could think of was Fane's face as he'd gazed down at his newborn children, of the sheer joy in his eyes, and of the warm weight of their little bodies at her breast. Her hand pressed to his neck, trembling. “God… you were all so beautiful…”
Time would bring his more positive emotions back to light, but for the moment he simply had to let his emotions run down whatever channel they wanted. Yet, she seemed to grow stern on the topic holding his face and with a small shake to make sure her words were understood and fully registered into his head. Fane stood and he listened, wide-eyed before some of the grief started to finally recede. “You and me,” he echoed that with a small smile lifting his hand to brush away her fresh tears. He wasn’t sure whether he could agree with the blame, her gaze was rather accusatory in the memory but he decided it was better not to point that out whilst she tried to ease his negativity.
Family would always be the turning point for Fane, his own especially existing as both his strongest and weakest points. Because caring so deeply for people made you vulnerable, but only through that vulnerability could the true depths of love and understanding be accessed. He’d made his peace long ago with that, but also with the notion that he never would have children that would share his eyes or hair so to suddenly be presented with that opportunity… It was shocking, heartwarming and heartbreaking all at the same time.
“We, we were all beautiful” he amended softly as he dwelled on what they had just seen. This didn’t mean he wanted those things immediately but… a future where there was that possibility? He didn’t even understand how. Eventually, after another lapse of silence he drew away “we should head back-- your gram and Wyn will probably be wondering where we got to.”
Faye had almost always worn how she felt on her sleeve. Be it anger, envy, jealousy, hurt, love… All her emotions were put out there for the world to see, if it knew what to look for. Fear was turned to anger, as was grief. Love turned to fear, jealousy to envy… up and down and over and under. Each emotion washing into the next like silt in a river bed. So it was now. All the emotions dredged up by the Wisp’s gift played over and over again through Faye’s mind and her heart. And she saw some of the same emotions mirrored in Fane as she looked into his dark eyes.
Faye nodded as he repeated her words back to her. The image of her screaming at him stayed heavy in her mind as well. That didn’t mean she believed it would ever come to pass. She didn’t believe it would. And perhaps seeing so many outcomes, perhaps that knowing would send them on a path to a happy one. Filled with family and laughter and happiness. Something they had both always wanted.
Faye’s family, the people she loved, would always and forever be her weakness. And her greatest source of strength. She would do anything for them. She would give up her life if she had to. But she would rather live, if it was all the same. Live and see them grow and prosper. Before her husband had disappeared, Faye had decided she wanted another child. A sibling for Eowyn to grow up with. Faye had been an only child, and it was lonely at times. She had no cousins to play with either, her parents growing up as solitary children as well. So Faye had always wanted a big family. But her efforts had failed, and she remained barren. And in falling in love as she had, with a man who could never father children, or so it had always been said of his species, Faye had contented herself with the fact that she would most likely never again feel life growing inside her. And that was alright.
And like Fane, she wasn’t near ready for that sort of step forwards in their relationship, but to see it, to feel it, even for a fleeting moment, was worth more than she could ever say. She just didn’t know how it could ever be. Though the Wisp’s magic wouldn’t lie. Faye knew this in every part of her that was magical, ever piece of her that was a witch. That future may never be, but it was real. In another time and place, it was as real as the two of them stood here now.
Faye nodded as he amended her words, and gazed at him for a long moment. Their son had had his eyes, dark and filled with a ruby sheen when the light hit them just right. The silence had settled finally, the last resonance of the Wisp and it’s magic gone, when Fane finally spoke of the here and now. “Yeah… yeah, we should. Come on.”
She took his hand, and together they navigated the way back through the greenhouse and into the late evening air. Fireflies bobbed through the garden, and Wyn rushed towards them when they both reappeared, eager to show them her catch.
Fane wished he had more than a glimpse of what that future could possibly be, more insight into what those potential lives would look like. Their youngest seemed to have Faye’s golden locks but his defined jawline, their daughter his raven locks but her mother’s violet gaze and their eldest still shocked as an almost miniature version of himself. Fane wasn’t sure how he felt about the possibility of a smaller version of himself out and about in the world but that was the burden of knowing such things.
There was no point in dwelling however, it was what it was and they would both carry the joy and sorrow of it between them but Fane felt inclined to getting out of the enclosure the greenhouse gave them. Which is why he was soon pulling her away from the domed room their fingers laced once more together.
As Wyn came rushing through the gardens with a jar full of fireflies clutched to her chest Fane managed to pull a smile onto his lips at her happiness using the young child’s infectious glee to distract him for the time being from what had happened in the greenhouse. No doubt they’d need to discuss it at some point but right now the toddler captivated all attention and for that he was quietly thankful. Adjusting his own jar that had remained tucked in the crook of his own arm he paused stooping down to take a look at the numerous bugs flashing on and off in the jar held up by the toddler. “Wow! Look how many you caught, that’s amazing! I think we’ve got a new champion” his enthusiastic tone earned a giggle from Wyn he spun to show Faye her prize.
In the meantime Fane unscrewed the cap of his own jar, releasing the fireflies he caught earlier in a small flurry of gold lights drifting off back towards the grass on lazy golden paths. With the night drawing on it was soon time to head inside, with the fireflies released, a chance to meet gram’s dogs and give them a small scratch, Fane eventually went to get a shower to wash off the journey and heat of the day whilst Faye put Wyn to bed.
By the time he heard the door click open he was already sat in bed in nothing more than his usual nightly attire of boxers reading through a couple of emails that had been sent to him. Tilting his head to peer at Faye over the brim of his glasses he offered her a tired smile feeling a bit more refreshed now than he did after the events of the greenhouse. “Did she go to sleep alright?” Fane figured the travelling would have likely tuckered the toddler out for the count but you could never know with those bundles of energy.
By the time Faye tucked Eowyn into her little cot that had been made up in Beulah’s room, at Wyn’s clear insistence on sleeping in the same room as her Grammie, it was growing late. The half hour or so apart from each other had given Faye time to settle her swirling emotions and recenter herself. Her Gram had given them both a quizzical look when they’d shown back up from the back of the garden, but hadn’t pressed either of them for anything.
It wasn’t something that would be left by the wayside though. And while nothing she’d seen had made Faye feel awkward or uncomfortable (a few of the only emotions she hadn’t felt that night), talking about it in the light of day instead of in the heat of the moment gave her only the slightest bit of trepidation. But again, it was too big to go undiscussed.
She smiled as she shut the door behind herself. “Yeah. She was out almost before I finished her story. It’s been a long day.” Faye needed to check her own computer for anything from the University, or anything else that might be important, but she couldn’t bring herself to get it out. The bed was entirely too enticing, as was Fane, looking entirely too appealing even in just glasses and boxers. Faye had on a t-shirt and cotton sleep pants, as was her go to, though she slipped out of the pants - it was entirely too hot - and tossed them over the foot of the bed as she moved to the bathroom to brush her teeth and wash her face.
A couple of minutes later, the water shut off and Faye came back out, pulling back the covers and climbing in beside him. She snuggled close, laying her head in his lap behind his laptop so she wouldn’t disturb him, and looped an arm over his bare legs. They were cool, but soon started to warm beneath her hands as she traced idly along his calves with her fingers.
She stayed quiet, not feeling the need to talk just yet, and simply absorbed the silence and the comfort of his presence.
“Don’t blame her, travelling is tiring as hell” the laptop was balanced lazily on his stomach his finger dragging idly over the screen to scroll the text as he read a couple that he had received. Fane needed the distraction; the connection to back home to relocate his emotional balancing point in case what they had seen did happen to come up as a conversation point tonight. It would come up no doubt but the question was simply a matter of when rather than anything else. As with most things between them time would provide them the opportunity and moment to discuss it when the moment felt and suited them both. At least that was his hope and intentions.
So he sat waiting for Faye to exit the bathroom the white glare of his screen reflecting in the glass of his spectacles currently perched upon the bridge of his nose.
Fane felt rather than saw Faye’s climb into bed, feeling the pressure of her head settle in his lap the weight causing his free hand to drop and take up petting her hair idly whilst he read a smile pulling at his lips as his toes curled and he shifted ever so slightly under the exploration of her fingers. For a few minutes that was how it existed, the two of them entirely at peace here, together away from the normal daily occurrences of home.
His fingers twirled an idle strand of her hair until eventually he shut off his laptop lowering the lid to gaze at her affectionately. “How are you doing?” They had agreed a while ago now to honesty and he knew Faye wouldn't do that. “Shouldn't stay up too much longer, it’s been a long day for you as well.” Setting the laptop aside on her bedside table he stretched himself out ever so slightly leaving himself open for her to move up and cuddle if she wanted to take the offer aware his coolness would be a temporary respite from the humid air hanging in the room.”
“It is,” Faye agreed. “And she runs ‘til she falls over.” Fane knew this about Eowyn by now. Her energy and curiosity overtaking her need for rest and down time. And that made her cranky. Which made bedtime or naptime a battle now and again. But tonight she’d gone down without any trouble, and Faye had kissed her Gram goodnight and went down the hall to her own room.
Faye too, knew they would talk about things when the moment was right. It might be now, or it might be a few days from now. They both tended to simply speak when the urge or situation presented itself, so she wasn’t worried about it getting brushed under the rug. Her fingers explored the smooth skin of his legs, and she smiled as she watched his long feet arch and shift. There was something inherently intimate about bare feet, Faye had always thought. Her hand drifted down to rub over the curve of his ankle, feeling the fine line of seemingly delicate bone beneath her fingertips.
His hand in her hair slowed her own explorations, and she hummed in approval. “I’m alright,” she said honestly. “Tired. A little… shaken. Maybe a bit confused…” She shifted to look at him, her head still in his lap. “About earlier.” In the greenhouse. She had questions, and wanted to hear his own theories and opinions, but honestly had no idea where to start. He stretched himself out after putting his computer away, and Faye sat up and moved to lay against him. She didn’t bother with covers, as the room was a bit warmer than she liked, and his coolness did wonders, even as he warmed beneath her. “It’s been a long day for all of us,” she said, not allowing him to leave himself out of the rotation.
“Are you okay?”
Fane laughed looking upwards, feeling at ease once more as their conversation stuck to easier things. “Well, that’s kids for you. Keep going ‘til they crash and then get right on up before setting off again.”
He couldn’t help the very minute wiggle earned from the brush of her fingers along his calves, Fane didn’t mind people touch him especially Faye but sometimes it still tickled a bit. He watched her over the screen of his laptop as she reached out and touched the firm line of his ankle, the bones shifting a little under her touch as he flexed his foot up. “See something you like?” he teased her lightly not at all minding her deft physical exploration of his body.
Fane’s own fingers brushed and stroked through her golden tresses, winding them loosely around his fingers before releasing and repeating the process again. He felt rather than saw her shift and looked down to her his fingers moving to stroke her temple reverently especially as she mentioned earlier. There were plenty of thoughts and feelings still floating around in his head about that and he merely hummed softly to show his agreement. “It has.”
He wasn’t entirely sure how he felt about it, or how to verbalise it “I’m not sure, I don’t know what to think--- whether I should be happy or sad or hopeful or not?” his expression contorted a little frustrated on the matter. “What do you think about… all of it?” Fane asked when she was settled against his chest shifting to slip an arm beneath her and press it into her heated flesh to help cool her down some.
“You have nice feet,” she said lazily as she continued to stroke over his skin.
She adored him playing with her hair, and was often left with little bits of it braided and twisted into intricate designs if they sat still long enough. Faye didn’t mind. Like the bruises and strawberry marks he left on her skin from time to time, anything that showed his affection for her was welcomed.
Smiling tiredly at him as he stroked her face, Faye reached up and covered his hand with her own, threading her fingers briefly with his as she pressed a kiss to his wrist. Once settled against him and wrapped securely in the circle of his arm, Faye took a moment just to listen to what he had to say. She felt the same way mostly. Happy, sad, hopeful… all rolled into one. And she told him so.
“And even after all that… none of it felt… wrong,” she chanced to say. “If that makes sense?” Faye grew quiet for a moment, pondering all the things she’d seen, though one thing stuck out in her mind, simply because it unsettled her: the golden light.
“What was that?” she asked him. “I know magic when I see it, and that was… that was something else.” Her eyes stayed focused on a point across the room, even as her hand tightened slightly over his chest. If not magic, then what? Faye wasn’t sure she wanted to know, but it seemed vital. More than anything else they’d seen in the Wisp’s vision.
“Just my feet?” he harrumphed “I’d argue all of me is nice.”
Fane had picked up a few things a while ago about learning how to braid and plait, though it was rare he got a chance to demonstrate such talent beyond those times Faye did let him play and mess with her hair. Though that evening he was content to simply brush, touch and twirl the odd strand around his fingers. His fingers grazed her temple reverently, brushing over her smooth skin and admiring her eyes as he did so. His own smile grew as she took his wrist and pressed a kiss to it letting her settle in his embrace.
“Yeah, I know what you mean… It should probably be terrifying, and admittedly some of it was but.. Yeah none of it felt wrong.” Fane had been so overcome with his thoughts of the harm he’d done that he’d not had much chance to consider the other aspect of it. His aspect of it. So her question had him mulling quietly, “I--- I honestly don’t know. It looked old though-- beyond old more... ancient. But it looked like magic to me? Or power… or… energy? Of some sort at least.” He couldn’t say for sure what but it was certainly odd to say the least. “I’ve never heard of vampires being able to channel things like that though, only witches?”
Fane’s arm circled her tighter not quite sure if he felt comfortable with the implication it suggested, something happened to him that gave him that power and that potential prospect was… Terrifying in itself. “Have you seen anything like that before? That energy?”
Faye nodded as he agreed with her. It should have been terrifying, the bad parts at least, or hell, even the thought of having children. But perhaps it was because they were both parents already and it was nothing new to them other than the circumstances of their - their children, good lord… the thought made her heart flutter for a thousand different reasons - potential children’s births.
“I wanted more kids,” Faye said quietly, but with a bit of a bitter huff. “Tried. But nothin’ came of it. Guess I’m too old. Or-” She stopped just shy of saying that she had always thought that her husband might have been taking something that prevented it. He had loved Eowyn, but had never shown anything but a passive interest. At least not after the excitement of her birth was over and the reality set in.
“No… not magic,” she continued. “At least not any magic I’ve ever seen. Not to say I’ve seen everything, but… it was…” Faye shuddered slightly. “Old. It felt… old,” she agreed. “And we can channel energy from ley lines. Mana pools. Even each other if the connection is strong enough. Vampires can’t channel that energy. But... I wouldn’t say that other species couldn’t channel an energy of some sort.” His arm tightened around her, and she knew he must be as disturbed by the thought as she was. “The last time I saw anything of the sort was when Ephram and I absorbed the magic of that ley line near my old house. It… it poured out of us like that. Until our magic got a hold of it and contained it. But it was split between us. And still people died that night. And when Ephram’s magic left, and it all went into me… it started leakin’ out. Takin’ my magic with it.”
“Whatever it is…” Faye wanted to tell him to leave it alone. But what if it wasn’t a bad thing? What if that was how their children came to be? Through whatever force embodied itself inside Fane? “Be careful,” she settled for.
Her admission caused him to shift, raising a hand to pull his glasses off and set them aside before he wrapped her up properly in his arms holding her to his chest hoping to give her some measure of comfort. “You did?” he wasn’t particularly surprised by this admission but Faye had never spoken of such things with him before. “I’ve never really considered having any more beyond Dani considering I had Sam as well essentially… Don’t get me wrong, I love being a dad but god it was trying at times. Drove me up the wall.” His fingers brushed up the curve of her arm and over the slope of her shoulder. “But you’re not too old are you? I mean-- You haven’t…” he trailed off his expression finishing that particular thought. “What else though?” he prompted gently knowing she had been about to start another thought before she stopped herself.
Fane frowned a little as she spoke of it not being magic, “it looked like magic though.” But what did he know? Faye was the one with experience with this sort of thing after all not him. Her mention of the ley line caused his discomfort to rise but he kept her held close. Especially considering he’d heard about the outcome of that particular event. “But what about someone without magic to contain it? Surely it would burn through them but… that didn’t look like it was burning through me?” Fane wasn’t really sure if the two events could be compared considering that seemed to take as much as it gave.
He chewed his lip letting out a quiet breath and settling to simply hug her close, “I will. I promise… If anything comes up I’ll let you know.”
“Yeah,” Faye said through a sigh. “I was an only child of only children… no siblings, no cousins. I always wanted a big family.” There was a slight sadness in her voice, though she smiled slightly at the remembrance of what she’d seen in the vision. “Figured Wyn might like a brother or a sister.” Her smile grew as he talked about his own experiences with being a parent. Fane had raised children to adulthood, and Wyn was still a baby, so he had more experience than her. Had lived through the teen years and now the early adult years. She couldn’t even imagine her own daughter at that age. Faye shrugged at his question. “I don’t know. I’ll be 40 next month. And I mean, yeah, I haven’t stopped-” She still had her cycles every month like clockwork, so that wasn’t an issue. He asked what else she’d been thinking, and Faye sighed.
“Sometimes I think he was using something that prevented it. I don’t think he wanted more. So he took my choice away without even asking me.” The bitterness was evident in her tone. “By the time I’d worked up the nerve to confront him about it, we hadn’t had sex in weeks. Months. So I just… I gave up.”
Faye looked up at him. “And it may have been magic, just not any I’ve ever seen. If it was old enough, it could be a type of magic that doesn’t exist anymore. At least in theory. You know as well as I do that pockets of things - creatures, enchanted objects, magic itself - still exist all over the world. Things that’ve faded from the world at large. Who knows what’s left to be found out there, in the places where most people would never go.”
The question was a good one. Fane was immortal, and his body could stand up to things that hers would never come close to handling, magic or no. “Maybe it wasn’t magic then. But more… an energy? A force? Something that would be contained by your body’s abilities?” It was really hard to compare witch magic and the magic of a ley line to something that would influence someone like Fane. It was like apples to oranges almost. Though they didn’t know if it was apples and oranges to begin with. All in all it was both madding for their respective curiosities, and frightening as well.
“Okay.” She turned her face deeper into his chest, breathing him in as she closed her eyes. He smelled so good, and they had time if they wanted anything more intimate than holding each other, but Faye didn’t want to move from his arms. Not that she didn’t desire him, she did - it always sat at a low simmer in her belly - but they were both exhausted. They had time in the coming days and nights. Even the mornings perhaps.
There were so many things she wanted to ask questions about. Did he think Dani would ever make him chose? Would he really dye his hair to spare her feelings as she grew older? How had they bound themselves so that she didn’t? A thousand questions rolled around in her head, but she didn’t ask them. Because she couldn’t pick just one. But a few things made her grin outright.
“You know I could totally take you in a Nerf fight, right?”
“Being an only child can’t be all bad, I mean at least you don’t have the issue of having to share stuff with other people and them whining about who’s the preferred child.” Fane pointed out giving her a gentle poke in the ribs to hopefully lighten her spirits. Fane had raised Dani and sam and he couldn’t be prouder of the pair of them, but it didn’t mean Dani’s decision to pick Sam over him didn’t smart like hell. It still ached even if he did his best to encourage them to move on with their lives, because… once again he’d not been enough for someone to choose him. Perhaps it was a selfish thought, but four hundred years of not feeling like you were enough for someone to pick you or stay never lessened that particular blow. He continued rubbing his hand up and down her arm as she spoke and his brows furrowed, “so I mean technically it isn’t too late for you to have more.” He pulled a face at the thought of her decision being taken away without her knowing and he couldn’t help but scowl a little, “you know the more you talk about him the more convinced what a dick he was, you know that right?”
She had a point, and he gave a slight nod neither agreeing nor disagreeing to it. There were plenty of things lost to time and there was absolutely no guarantee that that might be exactly the case. Time would tell ultimately. The debate could go on forever, “contained?” he echoed looking a bit dubious of that particular word “I’m not sure I like how that sounds but… I suppose.”
They did both have time for more things if they wanted, but he was content to lay here and simply hold her. The simple act physicality enough to sate him for the time being, plus they had the rest of the trip to themselves. There were questions he had but for now he wanted to think of them before he asked them.
His body shook under her in mirthful laughter, “uhuh sure,” he failed to sound convinced “whatever you say cherie… Whatever you say.”
“I guess it had it’s perks,” Faye agreed. She snorted at the poke to her ribs, jerking a little away from it. Faye knew an inkling of what had happened with Dani and Sam, but not a lot of details. They had chosen to be with Sam though, Faye knew. Which made what she had seen in the mirage all the more confusing, when Fane had come to her saying that he had to chose Dani or Faye and Wyn. The Dani Faye knew would never give her father that ultimatum. If they did… Faye could already feel the heat of anger at the memory. So she pushed it away. There was nothing in Faye that would ever chose anyone over Fane. Other than Eowyn. And even then Faye could think of no situation where it had to be either or. She’d just seen their future, after all. Every one that might ever exist.
“No. I guess technically it’s not. I mean, accordin’ to the Wisp, it’s not too late for either of us.” It was a statement of fact, not any kind of suggestion really. Like she’d thought before, she was in no way ready to take that step with him. Not that she wouldn’t be one day perhaps. The thought made her feel warm and hopeful. But even if it wasn’t a biological child as in the mirage, it was much too soon. Though there had been no adopted children in the glimpse they’d seen, other than Dani. Curioser and curioser.
“Yeah. Contained. I don’t really like it either.” And that was really all she could say. It was simply another possible future that may or may not come to pass.
Now it was her turn to poke him in the ribs. “I’m a damn good shot I’ll have you know. Keep laughin’ though. I’ll show you.”
He was incredibly tempted to turn his poke into a tickle but ultimately decided against such things, and held her fast so even though she jerked she couldn’t go far. But since they were on the topic of children Fane worried at his lip a little whilst he held her, “plus… another reason I don’t think I ever did was that-- Well, Dani’s very um-- not really possessive but… I don’t know whether another kid around would make them feel… Put out? I don’t really know how to explain it” Fane admitted with a slight frown trying to put into words his own concerns over the matter. “I don’t want Dani thinking that… If I ever did have or adopt another kid it would lessen them being my child? Does that make any sort of sense?” Fane wouldn’t think that Dani would ever make him choose, plus they had seemed happy about him finding someone he liked here in Springs but he couldn’t help but wonder just how they really might feel about things.
There were plenty of potential options but it was still early days for them both and Fane was content as they were because at the moment he wasn’t entirely sure what the future entailed. If children somehow could be added to the equation… Well, they’d cross that bridge when it arrived but not yet. Even with their potential glimpses there was nothing concrete about them.
Instead of dwelling on the prospect of him becoming some energy or power wielding individual his mind turned to more interesting things. “What about that binding? Have you ever seen or heard of anything like that? Like, extending a life-force somehow?” Fane asked curiously as his fingers danced down her arm once more feather-light and soft with every brush of them.
He made a slight ‘ooft’ sound as she poked him in the ribs but stuck his tongue out “whatever, you know what? Whilst I have nerf guns I also have a laser kit set that works… So I, Stefan Josiah Savin hereby challenge you to a match utilising no abilities sometime between the business that is our lives to decide who,” he paused for dramatic effect “is the best marksman or markswoman out of us.”
Faye frowned slightly as he talked about his reasons behind never seeking to have more children. While it was early yet, and all the potential futures they’d seen were all up in the air, pieces of sand that could be shifted and moved and blown away altogether depending on the choices they made, of which neither knew the ones that would lead to any particular eventuality, the fact remained that there was a child in the mix besides Dani. A living, breathing one who adored Fane already. And while Faye knew that the relationship between Eowyn and Fane was still in it’s infancy, and she didn’t dare label it with anything, there was no doubt that he meant a great deal to the little girl. But Faye kept her thoughts to herself. For now.
Because if it came to it and Dani, a grown woman, felt ‘put out’ by a three year old little girl with not an ounce of meanness or spite in her body, Faye would have something to say about that. They could bet on it.
But thankfully, the topic moved on, though the subject was only slightly less troubling. But at least about this Faye could speak. “I’ve heard of people binding their life forces together, yes. It’s blood magic, and borders on the dark side of things. Though usually there isn’t mutual consent. At least not in the few cases I’ve read about. The binding in the mirrors though… it was different. It was... “ Faye huffed, unsure how to even explain how it had felt to her. “It felt like… like coming home.” It was all she could think of, but it was true. Home, the place you were meant to be. The place that called to you, that comforted you, the place where you never had to be afraid or alone.
Faye let out a peal of laughter, giving him an only slightly patronizing pat on the stomach. “Alright then. But be prepared to get that fine ass spanked by a girl.”
Fane loved Dani, there was no doubt about that but there were times that when he thought about how things were between them he felt a heaviness weighing him down. Their stubbornness and vindictive streak was something he’d come to terms with a long time ago, plus they had been a handful by themselves so why would Fane want any more children beyond them? There were several other reasons beyond the one he’d given but Faye’s lack of response had him a little unsure whether talking about this was the right thing to do, it was still early days after all but he had promised to be honest with her and that was the truth or at least one truth.
Eowyn was vastly different to Dani in how she behaved, much more mild-mannered that felt like a breath of fresh air whenever she toddled into the room her curiosity much like Dani’s was boundless albeit charming but she never demanded any absolute attention through the intense mood-swings from how passionate Dani was even at a similar age. There was no in-between, it was either all consuming love or burning hate if you did something to upset them. Not that there was anything wrong with these things, not at all, they all made up who Dani was but it didn’t change that it sometimes made it difficult to know exactly where he stood with them. There was the secrecy about them too, something that had been troubling their relationship in particular lately (it had gotten better admittedly) but the mere thought of it was enough to make him close his eyes and sigh dejectedly. “Tell me something honestly--” he shifted a bit to look at Faye then “do you think I’m a good dad?” It was something he’d asked himself a lot over the last seven years and something he could never really be sure about.
Ultimately, what Dani did or felt wasn’t dictated by Fane; it never had nor ever would be but Fane knew his child well enough to be a little wary about how they would react to other children around him. There was nothing he could really do about how they felt, because as they had pointed out the night of his return they were their own person and not the child he’d spent years raising and pouring his love into.
His head lolled to the side lazily as she spoke of the binding magic, “well clearly if we were ever to do that there would be mutual consent… I mean, I’ve heard of binding generally but life-forces? What sort of things would be entailed in that?” Not to say that he was entertaining the notion… yet, but it couldn’t hurt to ask could it? “Have you--” but thinking better of his question he trailed off not sure whether now was the right time to ask whether she’d considered such things like extending her life. Instead, he smiled at her words “well, I can certainly say for a fact that every time I’m with you it feels like I’m home so… Maybe we’re on our way there?” His face stained a little red and he gave a quiet chuckle unsure quite how she’d take that “sorry- that’s sappy…”
The laughter was a welcome diversion, and he merely gave her that look one that he knew she’d understand without him even needing to say anything but he did anyways because how could he not? “You know-- that doesn’t sound half as bad as you think it does” he pointed out with a slightly more sly smile. “Though it does beg the question, do I get to spank you in turn if I win?”
Faye didn’t mind talking about it, she was just unsure as well where Eowyn fit into that mindset. It was obvious that Fane cared for her, and he had never held back affection or tried to keep her at a distance, just like with Faye. And she knew he wouldn’t just blatantly dismiss her. No, he would never do that. So perhaps it was just Faye’s own insecurities showing themselves briefly. After all, her own father hadn’t cared enough to stay around so why would-
Nope. No way was she headed down that road tonight. Fane cared. She knew he did. I mean just looked at what they’d just gone through together? What they’d been through already? And besides, the easiest answer was that he simply saw Faye and Eowyn as a complete package, and the thought that it would ever be a problem, seeing as how Dani had expressed their happiness for them already, never crossed his mind. At least that was Faye’s perception.
She looked up at him as he asked his question, and for a moment she was confused as to why he’d even ask that. “Of course. You’re an amazing dad. You always put your family first, and you’d do anything for Dani. You raised them to be smart, independent, strong… and I mean… I know things haven’t always been wonderful between you two, but… you did a good job, baby.” The last bit was said softly, as Faye smiled gently at him.
“I’ve only ever read about it. It’s not like a handfasting, or a marriage. More like a… binding magical contract that says our lives exist as one essence. For example… me an’ you.” A slight blush tinted her cheeks. “If… one day… we were to bind ourselves to one another like that, I would live as long as you. I would never age, since I’m bound to you and you’re never changing, physically. But also on the flip side, if I die, so do you. I’m not immortal. I can still be hurt, I can still get sick. I would have to look into specifics, but like I said… even with good intent and mutual consent, it’s blood magic.”
She looked at him curiously. “Have I what?”
But her look of curiosity turned to something softer as he took up her earlier sentiment. “No… no it’s not sappy. Come ‘ere,” she smiled. She tilted up and kissed him, one hand on his cheek to keep his face turned towards her. “It’s the sweetest thing I’ve ever heard.” And it was. To know that he felt the same as she did was, as always, a lightening of her heart, even as it grew more and more full of love with each passing day. With each moment they spent together.
She snickered, nipping lazily at his jawline. The hand that had rested there earlier drifted down to rub soft circles over the soft skin below his belly button, though she had no real intentions to go much further. “I might just wave a white flag if that’s what the loser gets.”
Her perception would be right and he would have confirmed that if she asked, but right now his mind was dwelling on Dani and some of his own insecurities were coming to light. Faye gave him her assurances but even that only helped ease a little of the weighing concern he felt and Fane couldn’t help but grimace a bit as she mentioned it not always being wonderful. He blinked, staring up at the ceiling like he might somehow find some answer waiting for him there “they ran away from home, from me for seven years without a word Faye…” there was a new touch of pain to his voice but also a bitter edge one that he very rarely let edge into his daily tone but proof that his barriers were slowly, ever so slowly starting to come down enough that he could talk to her about these things that were bothering him because he trusted her and sharing this was proof of that.
“Then when they finally come home and things finally start getting better… It eventually turns out that for months they’ve kept the fact that they found their biological family-- something not even I could manage and they never even… They didn’t even think to tell me. What does that say about my parenting skills? That they don’t even feel like… like they can come and tell me these things?” Perhaps it was the dam that had been broken earlier which provoked him to speak of these things but Fane found himself blinking back a few fresh tears. The things were stacking up when it came to Dani and him and it hurt to think he’d failed so badly that they couldn’t even tell him the truth about this monumental event in all their lives.
When he calmed down again he curled against her fingers winding around her arm as he held her close. “But are there any other side-effects or, consequences to it? Barring the mortality consideration?” Fane shrugged gently “I was just… wondering if you’d… well, thought about it?”
He felt her move and let her pull his head ever so slightly to near her own, his eyes fell closed as their lips met her mouth warm and inviting despite the brevity of the kiss and his expression grew even more bashful as she proclaimed it the sweetest thing she’d ever heard. “Well it’s true,” and it was, being with her felt like home and maybe he should have been surprised or a little worried about that but he couldn’t help how she made him feel and every moment he could feel him falling further and further towards something he knew he wouldn’t be able to deny forever no matter how cautious he was with these matters.
Her nip and the press of her hand only made a low sound rumble in his throat a cross between a deep laugh and something else. “Surrender so soon? I never thought I’d see the day.”
Faye pushed up on an elbow to look at him as he spoke about Dani, watching as he become slightly more agitated in the process. He seemed a bit different since they’d left the greenhouse. The poised calm that always settled across his face on most days and in front of most people was gone, replaced by a genuine look of open hurt and something else. A touch of anger maybe? Betrayal? Bitterness? Maybe all three? Faye couldn’t quite put her finger on it. But she didn’t stop him to ask, not when he was opening up about the things that bothered him, the things that hurt. That weighed on him every single day.
She stroked his arm soothingly, letting him know she was listening and that she would continue to do so for as long as he needed. It wasn’t until he questioned his worth as a father that Faye spoke up. “Dani leaving had nothing to do with your worth as a father. It was wrong of them, to leave like that. Just like it was of them not to tell you something so important. That doesn’t mean you raised them badly. Not one bit. We can only do so much as parents. Eventually the decisions are theirs. The consequences too. Doesn’t mean it doesn’t hurt. I know it does.” She pressed a kiss to his shoulder. “But you can’t blame yourself. You gave them everything they could ever want or need, and more. What they chose to do with that as an adult isn’t your fault.” He knew about her helping Dani with the grimoire, and that they had told Faye they thought it belonged to their biological family. Faye didn’t recall Dani ever mentioning that they had actually found that family though. Faye only remembered the book, and how it seemed to react the them, how she had come to the conclusion that there might just be latent magic in Dani. Maybe. And had cautioned them against doing anything more than reading the book. Even that she didn’t recommend doing alone. Fane knew all this, as Faye had seen no reason to keep it from him.
“Maybe they didn’t wanna hurt you? And it wasn’t done maliciously? It doesn’t make it right, but… maybe?” Faye thought that Fane should have been the first one to know if his daughter that he raised for nearly her entire life had found her blood family. It only seemed the right thing to do. But in the end it had been Dain’s decision, and while Faye didn’t agree with it and felt angry on Fane’s behalf, all she could do was to be there for him and support him and hopefully help him get through it. Whatever that might mean.
She couldn’t stand to see him upset, and so she petted him until he rolled over against her, and then she continued, her hands in his hair as they spoke of something else. “I’m not sure right off hand. I think if one person is deliberately trying to leech off the other, if the intentions aren’t pure, then the weaker person can suffer. But I’d have to read up on it.” She shook her head. “No. I never have. Never had a reason. Til now at least.”
She kissed him reverently, her nose brushing his and her lips forming a smile against his own. Her thoughts mirrored his, that perhaps she should have been a tiny bit hesitant or worried about how easy this felt, about how she’d already come to associate him with the place she felt safest and most like herself, where she felt like she could let her guard down and be who she really was, knowing that he would see that and not anything else. Knowing that he would see her. Just as she saw him. Faye had already taken that leap and accepted how she felt. But it had taken heartbreak, and the honest words of a trusted friend, to make her see it. That she loved him. And while she hadn’t said it yet, it had been on the tip of her tongue several times, the greenhouse with the Wisp bringing the word ‘love’ to her lips, but not the entire sentiment.
She was cautious too, but honestly she would be surprised if she lasted another month. And even if he didn’t say it back, Faye would be alright with that. She would just want him to know.
His laugh and the added hum made her nip at him again, slowly and without too much insistence. “Or I could still cream you and you could give me that as my reward.”
He needed to say it, needed to get the weight of that burden off his chest because if he was being honest it was tiring to carry that weight. “Then why does it feel like it was my fault?” he questioned knowing full well how that weight always hung around his neck that personal shame in this failure he felt. “It just feels like they’re slipping away, and sometimes I look at them and… I always see my kid but other times… other times I can barely recognise who they are anymore. What does that say about me?”
Fane didn’t mind so much anymore about Dani investigating their family but it would have been nice to have some idea. “I mean it would have been nice to have at least been told that Shivonne was her cousin but even with your work with that grimoire, they didn’t even let me know-- I found out through you. It just, feels like sometimes I’m banging my head against a wall with them… They say they trust me then they blatantly go off and do something without at least giving me some forewarning… What if something happens to them? What if something terrible happens and I don’t know? I’m not the sort to stop them experiencing life but… the danger they put themselves in… The things they do… they could die and I… I wouldn’t know because to them I’m just a side-note not worth enough to tell.” Fane wasn’t sure if his fears were logical or utterly irrational “it’s stupid but, sometimes it just feels like they don’t care enough to bother telling me anything honestly anymore.”
He drew in a breath as Faye suggested her thoughts on the matter raising a hand to wipe at his eyes “maybe, but don’t they realise that it hurts me more being left in the dark only to keep finding out later what they’ve done?” Fane wasn’t sure how long this would go on. Instead, he tucked himself up against her and let the pet of her hands draw him away from his concerns if only temporarily glad for the distraction. “Might be worth doing some research into?” it was asked casually enough but the implication of what he was thinking about was still there.
There would be no eternity with his caution, it was simply his own trepidation around that particular word and its carried sentiment that made it difficult to utter. Because if he was being honest and truly examined his feelings more closely he would come to the understanding that what he felt was exactly that. Love. He was just afraid to cross that line.
“Isn’t it meant to be a punishment? Not a reward?” Fane countered with another soft laugh.
“Because she's your daughter,” Faye said simply. She knew it bothered him. Deeply and on a level that Faye might not totally be able to understand quite yet, since Wyn was just a baby. But she did know one thing: that he was an excellent father. “The fact that it affects you so much, that you care so much, should speak for itself. Dani is… headstrong. I know that and I've only known them about as long as I've known you. Just because the path they choose is unfamiliar, or might change them, they're always gonna be your daughter.” Faye didn't know if she was helping or not. She felt like she wasn't really. What did she know about teenagers and grown children?
“Shivonne? The Deputy? Huh.” Faye's eyebrows raised in surprise. Dani had never mentioned that they thought their biological family might be so close. She'd never mentioned anything to Faye other than what she'd been told about the grimoire. But then again, Faye hadn't asked, and it really wasn't her business. But it was certainly Fane's. And Dani should have told him from the start. Not months later.
His frustration and his pain hurt Faye to witness, but she was glad for it. Glad he wasn't holding it inside and letting it fester. Letting it build and build until it exploded. Faye had never seen Fane angry. Upset yes. But angry? Or not in control of his temper? Never. But she had a feeling that once unleashed he would rage like a wildfire. Burn hot and fast and then sink into a deep, simmering, quiet anger. Which to Faye was worse than any outward display of such an emotion. At least with screaming and throwing things you knew where you sat. With anger turned inwards… anything could happen. “You are not a side note,” Faye told him firmly. “And it's not stupid. Not at all. But if it’s gotten to the point where you feel that way, then darlin’... you need to talk to them. I know you may not want to stir up that can o’ worms, but they can't keep treatin’ you that way. It's not fair. You can't keep worryin’ about pissin’ them off and them pitchin’ a goddamn fit and stormin’ out. If they're grown enough to go and do all these things, go on all these trips, do all this research, have a life of their own… then they can damn well put on some big kid panties and face the consequences.” Faye was flushed by the time she was done having a go. But not at him. Just… what kind of child treats their father - a man who had given them literally everything- that way.
“Sorry,” Faye sighed, and settled back down. “And maybe they don't. Maybe they're so wrapped up in themselves they don't realize how it's affecting anyone else.” She pet him gently, though her touch was a bit more firm than it had been before she'd gone off on his behalf. And then… he wanted her to look into… into the binding? The blood bond? Her hands slowed ever so subtly, a small pause as his words sank in. Did he mean… for them? For himself? For someone else? Deep down Faye knew what he meant. She'd seen it just as he had in the Wisp’s blue crystals. Several feelings fluttered through her chest: cautious excitement; blind panic; fear; acceptance; joy… so many things that rushed through her and made her heart beat just a little faster, which she knew - damn him - that he would hear. But in the end, a soft smile won out, and she kissed his crown gently. “Alright. I will,” she said quietly against his hair.
Faye didn't know when it would happen. Didn't know the exact minute or hour or even day that she would tell him how she felt. But soon. Her caution and her fear kept her quiet for now, and she was content to wait. Content as they were.
She grinned. “Punishment can be a reward, if you know what you're doin’.”
She had a point, Fane knew she had a point but it didn’t mean he wasn’t frustrated by his own inability to relate as completely as he used to when they were younger. “Headstrong? That’s putting it mildly” Fane chuffed slightly, “always has been that way though-- tell them no and they’ll go do the thing out of sheer curiosity about why you said no in the first place. Parenting them involves structuring what you say in such a way you don’t give them a reason not to go and jump from the frying pan into the fire just because they want to know why you said no in the first place.”
He sighed again more resigned now, “yeah that’s her-- don’t know the woman personally, I’m sure she’s nice enough but… It’s also kind of terrifying. Apparently her kid looks like a spitting image of Dani.” Fane wasn’t exactly sure how he felt about Shivonne or her presence in town, part of the reason he hadn’t sought her out or made any attempt to contact her yet. Until Fane knew where he stood well, he’d cross that bridge when he felt ready and able which he really didn’t right now.
Fane had been keeping this in for months, and to talk to someone about it was good- a small relief on the building pressure but it didn’t diminish the feelings very much. He could feel Faye bristling and he hadn’t meant to get her worked up and felt a little guilty for bringing it up to make her react this way in the first place. She was right, his anger when it did show burned bright and fierce before boiling doing to a constant simmer. He knew the difference between hot and cold anger; one would consume you whole the other? That could be manipulated and shaped to shore up resolve and steel will to accomplish seemingly impossible feats. Again, Faye was right but it didn’t make it any easier to broach. “I know,” he finally admitted with a small huff “I’m just--- I’m afraid of the consequences. I’ve lost Dani once and it almost killed me, I lost Silas now, and if I lose Dani again?” Fane wasn’t sure what would happen to him after that if things took a turn for the worse.
“S’fine, I know you mean well by it.” Fane wasn’t very used to people jumping to his own defence, always playing lawyer for himself so for Faye to rant if only momentarily about something… it caught him off guard but also flooded him with considerable warmth. So, Fane settled down into her arms though his next suggestion sparked an entirely different reaction and he wasn’t sure how to take the speed in her heart increasing - excitement or panic? But she kissed his temple and agreed, a part of him wanted to tell her she didn’t need to if she didn’t feel comfortable but… she wouldn’t have agreed if she didn’t want to consider it would she? Thus, Fane let it be.
“Well… when you put it that way,” he laughed “we’ll just have to see who wins and go from there.”
“I hope Wyn ends up more sensible and not quite so stubborn,” Faye half- laughed. “You can't fault curiosity, but curiosity without caution…” She trailed off, leaving the rest of the sentence unspoken.
“Noel,” Faye said, giving the little boy’s name. “He's cute. Smart too. I'm sure if you ever wanted to talk with her she'd be willing.” And Faye left it at that.
She remembered full well what losing Fane had felt like, even if it had been temporary. And then almost losing her daughter… that terror and the panic that came with it. If Fane had felt anything like she had when he’d permanently lost a son that he remembered having like he was as real as Dani, then Faye didn't know how he'd stood it. And she understood even more why he’d left. “You won't lose them,” Faye said resolutely. “You won't.” Did she know that for certain? Of course not? But she would do everything in her power to make sure it didn't happen.
He was right; Faye wouldn't have agreed if she had been uncomfortable. Well… too uncomfortable. The idea, even though she knew it was just research, gave her so many conflicting emotions - not bad, other than the tiny bit of panic that sat tight in her chest - that she couldn't say anything past her soft agreement. What could it hurt after all?
“I guess we will,” she smiled, still with her mouth against his crown. They were quiet for a bit before Faye asked, “Do you wanna go out tomorrow night? To the city? We could drink too much and make out in the Quarter?”
“Guess time will tell,” that was all he could truly say on the topic and as she offered up Noel’s name he nodded storing it away in the back of his mind. “I’ll keep it in mind.”
There was no denying it was hard, and there were days that sometimes it felt like there truly was no point in going on but he always ended up reminding himself of the people in his life that did make it worthwhile. He couldn’t stay living in the past no matter how much some part of him wanted to. So he pushed through his feelings, buried or set them aside to try his best for the others in his life; Dani, Faye, Eowyn and everyone else he cared about. “I hope you’re right,” he really did because Fane wasn’t sure how he’d deal with any other outcome than Dani still being around.
His mind was mostly on the potential what ifs, plus he couldn’t deny he was curious about this binding magic. There always tended to be prices and repercussions so wasn’t it better to make sure that they were fully informed if they ever considered such a spell or ritual? No harm in research in the slightest.
As the pair of them finally settled his head tilted a little against the press of her mouth her breath warming him with every exhale. “How could I say no to that? Mm, yes I’m all for drinking too much and making out with my gorgeous girlfriend considering it involves my three favourite things-- you, booze and making out… All three of which I have been severely deprived of lately.”
Faye hummed as she did when she was agreeing with him but really didn’t have any other words to add. Her hands continued to stroke through his hair, down along his neck and shoulders, trying to soothe him into getting some rest. She didn’t know the true depth of the weight he carried, didn’t know the darkness of his thoughts when things got to be too much. If she had… If she had she would have done her best to help carry the weight that he’d shouldered for so long. He hadn’t been alone over the last four hundred years. She knew he hadn’t. But how much of the things he carried had he carried alone? Unable or unwilling to let anyone help him? How many times had he pushed aside what he wanted, what he felt, over concern for someone else?
Too many.
“Me too,” she said, a soft, short sound. “Me too.”
Faye had never wanted immortality. The prospect of it had frightened her for most of her adult life. Or more the prospect of being alone for centuries. Because who would choose her in this lifetime, let alone for eternity? But now… now the prospect didn’t seem to dark. There would be a price, as all magic had, and the price of immortality was just that: not being mortal. Watching friends and family grow old and pass on. While you stayed forever the same. But what if you found someone to share forever with? What then?
Like Fane had said, only time would tell.
She laughed low in her throat as he agreed that going out, and her suggested activities, was a very good idea indeed. “Well then, consider it done. It’s been a long time since I tied one on in my hometown with a good lookin’ man next to me.” She shifted a little, pulling the covers up as the room had cooled off, the air conditioning finally kicking in. “Now try and sleep. ‘Cause you’re gonna need your strength to keep up with me later.”
Fane drifted off before Faye, who lay awake for a long time before falling asleep herself. Her dreams were of Nightwisps, glass houses full of laughing children, and the slow fall of golden sand through an hourglass made of bones. It fell, and fell…. and fell… forever.
FIN.
#i: faye#i: eowyn#trip: new orleans#long way back#down in new orleans#murder mention cw#sex mention cw#Hardly but still#implied miscarriage cw#This is like#Part 1 of 4 or 5#so#YOU'LL HAVE TO WAIT FOR THE 3 and 4#Because we're still writing them
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Why it doesn’t matter anymore whether the lostspecial’s “revelation” is genuine or if there’s a 4th episode
First thing to say is this: I never post anything, I live in the shadows, and enjoy taking part of TJLC behind the anonymous’ face. I have followed several tumblr account from a long time. I have been part of TJLC since the day lsit created her blog, the day after TSoT. In other words, I have seen my fair share of mindfuckery, of blogs I liked receiving hate but I have never taken an active role in this fandom until now.
Like many TJLCers, I decided to watch TFP having high expectations, knowing for sure I was about to witness something groundbreaking.
Well, I wasn’t wrong. Not really.
First came disappointment: so was everything a farce? A pure publicity stunt? Even the lostspecial website is a lie? Are we that desperate for something to be clever?
And then I was thinking… So what if we are? None of this makes sense anyway. Why shouldn’t we ask for a miracle?
Here’s the thing, when you rewatch that fuckery that is TFP, if you start explaining with knowledge you get at the ending, everything falls apart. Oh, this is Eurus, she’s on a plane and needs Sherlock’s helps but also Eurus cuts the communications and uses herself as a bargaining chip. Continuity? What’s that? Sherlock wear the Bellstaff because I say so, even though he didn’t have it when he decided to shoot himself.
That’s the point casuals decide the Sherlock show was that bad and move on. That’s also the point people with a brain and loving puzzles decide to dig deeper. In half a week, TJLC (+ the new TFHC) was back on scene, tearing apart the narrative and saying: that cannot be real, therefore it’s not. But they didn’t use shitty arguments, they didn’t decide to let logic flow out of the window, in fact, they used what the narrative gave us unlike many say, they were the most logical out of everyone actually.
So, there, we’ve proved there’s more at work, we know our show, we know who the bastards behind this are. They’re fans, like us, and what do they want, what do we want?
We want a miracle. We want Sherlock to survive the Final Problem, to escape the Reichenbach’s Falls and let him be true to himself. We want no loose ends and there are so many, we want what others have said for years to come true, we want Sherlock out of the closet, after more than a century. The Final Problem can never be the end, otherwise all is lost. You cannot be allowed to destroy your show there if you’re a fan.
So, people start to look for the Lost Special, an episode TEH proved Mofftiss knew and they found the disaster that was ATY. At that point, I admit, we could have been convinced we were wrong. It wouldn’t have taken much, just a few words from the Powers That Be that they’re sorry to have lead us on, something official, not a tweet dismissing the last years as a ludicrous fantasy. What we got instead was radio silence and another show thinking, let them think what they want, that’s good for us. ATY said no, but it was a little no, one that means, what don’t you try to find it yourself? Who knows what you’re going to see ;)?
So 22/1 wasn’t the right solution, okay. How about 29/1, that’s the day they met, you can’t go wrong with this, right? Apparently yes, but by the time we noticed, we had to bear watching two people with no chemistry fuck within the 7 first minutes and end with a rape while we need to beg a 7 years old show to finally address the elephant in the room and to have the protagonists say they have Feelings™.
That’s roughly the moment I started thinking, maaaybe there’s no 4th episode but then, what about these hundreds of meta confirming my suspicions? People smarter than me have built foundations for these ideas and here’s where it hurts: it makes total sense, it fact it’s so far the only way S4 can make sense and be bearable, even enjoyable.
Yes, what TJLC says is ludicrous at first glance, that’s the most insane thing I’ve heard. I mean, a true conspiracy? A fourth episode hidden in plain sight? Who can even believe in it? How improbable is that?
But once you’ve eliminated the impossible, what remains, no matter how improbable, how insane it seems, must be the truth.
Here’s what we have deemed as impossible: these two men cannot have made this shitty S4 accidentally. Gatiss is a gay man working for queer people to get representation in medias, Moffat turned Sherlock and John into Vastra and Jenny, two lesbians who kissed on screen on a children show. Moffat is a good writer, Heaven Sent is evidence enough and TAB’s last scenes proved they get what the heart of the show is. We have people who are good at their jobs, writers, actors, and there is no way so many of them fucked up so much at the same time. Not even BBC’s advertising team. Not when the stakes are that high.
Here’s what we have deemed as improbable: Mofftiss wants us to crack, they are two men with enormous egos who want to leave their mark in Sherlock Holmes’ history. Permanently. They love an adaptation who didn’t succeed in making Holmes gay and have decided to get the story right. They want us to cry bitter tears of relief, they want to pull the rug and say after the fact: see? It’s always been a love story, you saw but you never observed. It’s always been a story of love, a story about a detective and his blogger who keeps him right, about two broken men who managed to find happiness together and do great things. To reach that goal these two bastards are willing to play a very long game, to mindfuck everyone and break the fandom before mending it.
Here’s finally what seals the deal: when you start thinking you must add the ‘it’s not real but everything is a metaphor’ and ‘we are the missing piece, we are part of this,’ everything makes sense. In fact, that’s the only way it does. TJLC had predicted every plot point in TAB? They have managed to get back on tracks their deductions, they wobbled but didn’t break. They are nit-picking on details but widely agree on the big things. I dare anyone to give another explanation for S4 without using ‘the writers are that bad’ as a reason for relevant plot points. The more you search, the more you find that goes on that direction.
Now, people had found a website they were wary of but decided to go down the rabbit hole in hope of finding something. The people in charge of this site now say more than a week later: by the way, none of this was real. The codes? Made up. The pictures? Also made up. The lines on the code sources? We wanted to see how desperate you were. Some people even tried to see things that weren’t there in the 27kra video (thanks, but I noticed in the end I was wrong and let it go immediately). Look how stupid TJLC is, how much in denial these people are. There is no 4th episode and there never will be. Carry on, you silly child.
It’s too late.
I’m not saying this explanation isn’t possible. Maybe that website was a fake after all but too much happened. Several blogs received many encrypted messages and reveal that someone is playing with our nerves, someone clever and who has too much time on his hands to be a hater. Sherlock North happened, disturbing codes and messages were sent, thelostspecial.com happened and had things he wasn’t supposed to have on his site, we are 100% convinced at this point that they want to break our faith, nothing now will change our mind. Even if several trolls took part of this, the snowball effect is there and you can’t stop it anymore. And with dymm (who may or may not be a mole) having excited twitter and even causuals non-stop for a month, the idea cannot be banished anymore.
Here’s the truth of this: it doesn’t matter at this point if there is or not a 4th episode. Sherlock’s show has an enormous hole and they need to do something to save it. TJLC managed to give an alternative reading that makes 100% more sense than anything else. Even if (which I doubt) that hadn’t been Mofftiss’ point, they need to take what we have thrown at them to save themselves. Here’s the real Final Problem, what’s it’s always been about from ACD’s time: how is the fandom going to save Sherlock Holmes?
Make history, is what we tell them today. Dazzle us with your cleverness, prove us we were right to believe in Sherlock Holmes. Open the closet you’ve put yourself in, we’ve found the key and got your back. And if, somehow, we are wrong in thinking you are half as clever as we think, then what you did, all that queerbaiting was disgusting and we are going make history anyway. Sherlock Holmes doesn’t belong to you. We, the fandom, is the reason he is still alive and we won’t let you kill him without putting a fight. This isn’t about being in denial anymore. This is us, telling the authors how it’s going to be.
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