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slasher-catcher · 2 years

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Spider Rings - Ch.1

Art the Clown x Reader

(Originally posted on AO3 by Frothy-Frowns -- relax, that’s my NotSFW username, I’m not ripping someone else’s work, lol)

Summary: In cute, playful banter, you accidentally marry a strange monochromatic clown with cold eyes. Congrats! Best of luck to you on your honeymoon~

First chapter is SFW. The next one is NSFW and has two versions for either genitalia, depending on the reader’s preference. Absolutely NO minors, please.

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18 Pages/ 8,561 Words ... so, uh, a pretty lengthy read.

Warnings: ... none in this chapter really, other than Art being Art. So like.. mild stalking? General creepy vibes? Some good ol’ fluff. Accidental marriage. Maybe hinted unhealthy obsession. Swearing. This closely follows the beginning of Terrifier.

I completely threw away the whole bathroom scene because that man will NOT be getting any ass if he’s been rolling around like a dung beetle. We have SOME standards, damn. (Reader’s description isn’t enclosed, but I sorta wrote this with them being plus sized in mind, so do with that information what you will. Also Reader uses they/them pronouns.)

“I think I just twisted my ankle!”

“Dawn, really?” Tara laughed in exasperation, propping the stumbling scarecrow girl up on her left, tucking her shoulder underneath her arm for support. Reader took to her right, snickering along with their drunken giggling. The little group had just left a rather rowdy Halloween party just down the street, slowly making their way towards Dawn’s car parked to the curb, a ways further than the line of cars of the fellow partygoers.

The outing sure was… something, as far as Reader could say. Parties weren’t particularly their scene, but Dawn was pretty persistent when she wanted to be (which was often, unfortunately), and Tara may or may not have bribed them with the promise of Halloween treats that were sure to be there. Reader could still taste the sweet icing of the orange and black cupcakes on their tongue. The sugary confection was certainly more welcoming than the aftertaste of a poorly made candy corn jell-o shot, anyhow.

The feverish night seemed to slowly simmer down to a chilly crawl the further the trio walked into the night, their chatter and clicking steps being the only sound in the hushed dark. Streetlights overhead lit the stretch of asphalt, concrete and their hair a mix of blinding white and cold orange, making their wriggling shadows seem a lot taller than what they really were. “Maybe ya wouldn’t have twisted it if you hadn’t gotten on top of that table,” Reader sighed, shaking their head and readjusting Dawn’s weight on their side. Dawn only shrugged her shoulders in dismissal, blonde hair bouncing with the movement. “And dance with clearance-isle Gru and his cluster-fuck of minions on the floor?? Hard pass, babe.”

Tara groaned in mock irritation, rolling her eyes.The print of her ribcage-designed top flashed a smidge in the cool lights every time she twisted a certain way. “Thanks a lot, by the way.”

“For what?” Dawn laughed.

“For promising you weren’t gonna get shit faced tonight.”

The girl pulled an innocent face that neither Reader nor Tara believed. “Guys kept buying me drinks. I can’t help it if people find me interesting!” “Yeah, it was definitely your mind that they were after,” Reader snarked sarcastically, earning them a swift pinch on their shoulder before Dawn fully pulled her arm off of them, retrieving her phone from her patchwork pockets. Tara easily caught sight of the cell phone’s glow and twisted her head, trying to sneak a better peek. “Who’re you texting?” Dawn raised her nose high into the air and tucked the screen against her shoulder, hiding it away from her prying eyes. “None of your business!”

Reader’s eyebrow raised as Tara pulled away from under Dawn’s arm, leaving her to fully walk without both of their support. “You gave that asshole your number, didn’t you?” Tara asked accusingly, nearly scoffing in disbelief. In hindsight, she really shouldn’t be so surprised. This was Dawn they were talking about. The girl has zero restraint for most everything that comes her way.

Dawn wagged a finger in her face back and forth mockingly. “Oh my god, you’re SO jealous.”

“Of what? That kid was talking to like, five other girls!”

Reader rolled their eyes and gave their head another shake. They could hardly believe that anyone would want to give their number to the meatheaded viking guy that kept purposely spilling his sticky, watered down witches brew punch on nearly all the girls at the party for a chance to chat, but Dawn was just a different breed, they reckoned. It wasn’t too long until they finally reached their designated curb, slowing down their pace when the car came into view.

“Oh, stop being such a bitch, just get in the car.” Dawn scooted past the both of them to round the vehicle, only to be stopped mid stride by Tara taking hold of her wrist. “Oh, you are not driving.”

Dawn dangled her car keys in her hand, letting them clink and clack, as if the gesture alone proved her sobriety. “I’m fine.” Tara wasn’t having any of it. The girl herself had thrown back the odd drink or three too, but at least she could walk a decently straight line without any assistance. Well… not much, anyway. Although, those Jekyll & Gins were beginning to talk back to her.

Nevertheless, she held her hand out to Dawn expectantly. “Give me the keys,” she demanded.

Reader nudged past them to lean against the side of the car, arms folded across their chest as they watched the two throw a minor fight over the keys, patiently waiting for them to finish. The ends of their long, billowy black sleeves fluttered from the chilly breeze that flew past. Their fingers tippy-tapped against their arms, tongue idly prodding at the little extensions they stuck onto their canines. In all honesty they were pretty impressed that the fangs had stayed intact all throughout the night – they were certain when they were sticking them on that they would pop right off in the middle of the party. Hooray for little victories! While the little group hovered around the car, across the way were a man dressed from head to toe in a clown costume, trudging along. The steps he took in his rather large black shoes padded louder the closer he walked towards them. The black trash bag that was slung over his back crinkled when his gloved grip tightened around it. After what felt like an hour – but what was definitely only a few heavy seconds – Dawn finally caved, letting Tara take the keys from her hand and slumping back into the cool metal of the car. Reader frowned in disapproval, arms crossing a little tighter against their chest when Tara gave a little stumble of her own. “Really don’t think that’s such a good idea either, girly. You smell pretty flammable yourself.” “Then why don't you drive us, Reader?” Dawn released a long, drawn out groan, beginning to lean her weight more and more on the hood of her car. It seemed like all those poison apple martinis were finally dragging her down into a full stupor. Oh boy. They sighed and scratched awkwardly at the back of their neck, fingers catching on the black lace, jeweled choker wrapped snugly around it. They sure did hope they didn’t accidentally rub off the two little fang bite marks they dotted right above it with red marker. “You already know I can’t drive. Besides, my place is nearby. Can’t very well drive you home and make it back, D.”

The blonde scarecrow only gave an unintelligible drunken grumble under her breath at that.

Tara groaned and stuffed the keys into her pocket. “Yeah you’re right, Reads. I’m fucking lit. But if I get something to eat, I can drive us, okay?”

Footsteps stopped more than a few meters away from the trio, crunching leaves silencing. The clown paused when their squabbling finally reached his ears, snapping him out of the set daze he had been in. With a frown he watched them from the shadows, as silent as the night around them. Pitch black eyes studied the three persons closely, as if memorizing their images for later.

“Did you say food?? Is there even a place that’s open late?” Dawn sat up a little from her perch on the hood, a light cringe stretched across her face. Reader nodded, sticking their thumb out and pointing it in one direction. “Well there’s a pizza place just ‘round here. Could give that a go, yeah? I can stay with you guys a tick longer until you get your bearings.”

Tara gave a short nod at the suggestion. “Yeah, that’ll work fine. Come on D, let’s-”

“Okayokayokay. Just give me… one minute.” Dawn mumbled, holding up a hand as her eyes fell closed. Reader hummed with a little concern, biting their lip until just a little fang poked out over their black painted lips. As aggravating and nerve-wracking as Dawn could be, they certainly didn’t take much pleasure in seeing her aching like this. “Fuck me,” Tara groaned, throwing her head back in annoyance, black hair spilling across her face. “Like, one minute, for real.” Dawn pleaded softly before falling silent, needing a moment.

The skeleton gave a sigh, shifting her weight until she stood comfortable enough to wait ‘one minute’ out. Her eyes began wandering around to take in the not-so-interesting scenery before they caught sight of someone in the shadows. Her brows furrowed as she stared at the tall, thin clown standing stock still, a rotten toothed grin stretched across his face and accented with heavy black grease paint as he stared right back at her. A chill shot down her spine.

“Take all the time you need, it’s okay.” Reader pulled their cross body bag a little closer, digging into it until they retrieved an unopened bottle of water and of ibuprofen, handing both it and the pills over to Dawn. The scarecrow didn’t hesitate to toss the medicine into her mouth and wash it down with heavy gulps of water, nodding a silent thank you towards them.

The vampire raised an eyebrow, snorting in amusement. “Y’know, I could have just handed you a couple of fentanyl and you took them without even looking at them. For shame, Dawn. For shame.” The water bottle crunched loudly as Dawn drained it empty, gasping when she finally pulled it away from her lips. “At this point I’m willing to suck twelve dicks if it meant my head would stop spinning.” Reader choked, barking out a surprised laugh. “Jesus christ you’re a hazard to society! Your mother must be proud.”

Dawn grinned, tossing the plastic bottle into her car carelessly. “Who do ya think taught me, Reads?”

And just like that, Reader’s laugh turned into a thread of strained wheezes, leaving them to clutch their stomach.

Neither friend noticed Tara’s stiff stance as she continued to lock eyes with the clown nervously. Her shoulders fully tensed up when the clown’s dark eyes released their grip onto Tara and darted swiftly over to land on Reader as soon as they began laughing at whatever they and Dawn were talking about.. A bead of sweat began to form on her brow from her rising anxiety. Just what was this guy's damage? “.. D. D, Reads, look.”

Prompted by her urgent hissing, they both turned their heads towards where she was staring.

“Holy. Shit.” Dawn began laughing at the stranger in the shadows. Reader blinked, taken quite aback when their gaze fell onto the man in the shadows of the buildings, who already had such a piercing stare settled onto them. Not a shred of light seemed to reflect in his gaze.

Did.. did he recognize them from somewhere?? He couldn’t have been at the party they just left, he was coming from the wrong direction. That, and Reader was pretty sure that they’d remember a unique face like his. The sharp, protruded cheekbones with an equally sharp chin that jutted out, a large hooked nose with a little black dot on the tip and heavy makeup lined around his eyes and mouth sure did stand out, even in the dark. They could tell that he certainly put a lot of work into his costume, and it definitely showed.

They raised a hand and gave a polite little wave, their sleeve swaying with the movement. “Uh, hey there! Lovely night, isn’t it?”

“Reader!!” Tara hissed and grabbed their waving wrist, tugging them back and making them give a little squeak in surprise. “That is not funny. I’m about to scream.”

Reader turned to look at Tara, face twisted in confusion as they rubbed at their wrist. “I.. I wasn’t jok-”

“Heeeey, handsome!!” Dawn called out, waving widely to him, laughing loudly. “My friend wants your number!” “Dawn, cut it out,” Tara grimaced, looking back and forth between her heckling friend and the menacing stranger. “I’m gonna fucking kill you.”

Dawn disregarded her friend’s demand, always looking for a way to further stir the pot of trouble. “Come buy us dinner!!”

As the two quarreled, never did the clown’s piercing stare leave their vampire-dressed friend. A little trickle of worry began filling Reader when they realized that he never blinked once. Their hands slowly closed into one another, twisting with concern. Aw man, was he needing something? He seemed so unnaturally still. They took a short step towards him, tilting their head to the side. “Hey, um.. do you need help with something? Is it … your bag? I could help carr-” “Oh my god you guys, stop!” Tara’s breath got momentarily caught in her throat when Reader took a step closer towards that.. thing. Her hand shot out to once again grapple their friend and yank them closer, keeping her hand around their wrist. “Just shut the fuck up.” Their eyebrow twitched in annoyance with their friend, yanking their wrist out of her grip with a silent huff. Heaven forbid they manage to get one word in without her interrupting. “T, please. I was just saying hello. That’s not a crime.” “Maybe he’ll drive us home,” Dawn snarked at Tara, swiping the keys from her to dangle in front of her face.

“Seriously you guys, I wanna leave. Now.” Tara deliberately looked away from the stranger, not being able to handle those ice cold eyes peering at them from the dark. Of a clown, of all things, a fucking clown. They gained some weird creeping Peeping Tom and he just HAD to be a clown.

Reader pinched their brow in frustration before calling out to the lingering clown once again. “I’m sorry for my friends, sir, we…” When they had glanced back towards where he had been located, the shadows were bare. Their face creased with confusion and gave the whole street a quick look around, frowning lightly. “... where did he go??”

At their ominous words, Tara whipped back and glanced around as they had, feeling her anxiety increase tenfold. A sticky ball of dread began growing inside Tara’s belly, forcing her to nudge Dawn awake from her slouched, lethargic fog. “Let’s go. Come on, let’s just go.” She tugged her off the car’s hood, pulling her along. Reader trudged along right behind them, arms beginning to hug around their center. The encounter succeeded in throwing them off their kilter a bit. The guy hadn’t even said a word and the girls had treated him so awkwardly. Oh, they could already tell that this will eat away at them for at least the next few nights.

●・○・●・○・● ●・○・●・○・●

The large, brightly glowing sign that read PIZZA, WINES & LIQUOR buzzed over the pizza shop with a hum. Inside the shop, rock music accompanied both Tara and Reader as they sat together in one of the few booths provided in the small closure. Reader lightly swung their feet, keeping themself occupied by sipping on the drinks that were provided and carefully folding the napkins they plucked out of the table's dispenser. They hummed along with the overhead guitar solo as they slowly created a little origami creature.

Tara leaned against the pale bricked wall of the inner booth, thumb sliding across her screen every couple of seconds. She was going through the reel of selfies that were taken at the party, many of the three friends laughing along and having fun.

"Oh yeah? You dressed up?" At the main counter, the owner stood with a telephone pressed to the side of his face, rapping his knuckles against the counter as he spoke. "Oh, you sick fuck… where am I gonna go, back to my wife?" He replied as if whatever notion the person on the receiver had said was incredulous.

Tara’s eyes pulled away from her screen and glanced over her shoulder at the pizza man, unimpressed with the one sided conversation. Out of curiosity she looked back at Reader to see if they too were listening in, but they seemed to be completely into their own little world.

The man's chatter went on and Tara decided to sink herself back into the photo reel, until a brightly flashing red battery icon took over the screen, before it completely turned black. Her tired face reflected back at her. "Great."

Almost as if summoned by the dying battery, Dawn’s heels clacked loudly on the tiled floor as she made her way back from the bathrooms, the toilet still running loudly in her wake. The restaurant phone began to ring once again in the background as she slid into the empty side of the booth, groaning in relief.

"That was the longest piss I have ever taken."

Tara placed her phone back into her pocket, sarcasm dripping off her reply. "Thank you for sharing that."

Reader snickered under their breath, fangs poking out from their lip as a smile tugged on the corners of their mouth. "Charming as always, D."

Dawn made a face at them before pulling her own phone out, scrolling through her notifications. "This guy wants me to meet him at his apartment right now."

"What a shocker," Tara replied easily, taking a peek across the table at her phone, as if to read the message herself.

Reader glanced up from their napkin, giving Dawn a raised eyebrow before returning to their folding and creasing. "Are you gonna do it?"

The scarecrow shrugged, a mischievous smirk pulling at her lips. "I told him I would."

That made Tara’s eyes snap back to their friend. "What??"

Dawn pulled up from her phone with a roll of her eyes. Jesus, sometimes Tara’s nagging really grinded on her nerves. “I’m kidding. I have a little more self respect than that.”

“If only you had a brain.” The skeleton replied, side eyeing their friend with a smirk, folding her thin arms and propping them on the table. Dawn sent a snarky face at her in response. “I’ve been wanting to use that one all night.”

“Congratulations,” she sneered saucily before tucking back into her phone screen. Just as the word had left her mouth, the door of the shop was tugged open with a clatter, doorbell tolling with a ding of the new arrival. The monochromatic clown that they had unofficially met in the street pulled his way through the door, trash bag sitting heavily over his back.

Neither the scarecrow nor the vampire looked up, too preoccupied with their activities to take notice, but the skeleton sure did. The bell caught her ear and had her looking over, only to feel her heart drop hard at the sight of the clown. Her chest began hurting with rising anxiety when she saw that his seemingly soulless eyes instantly targeted and locked onto Reader as he made his way to the booth parallel to their own. He stuffed the trash bag in first, pushing it against the wall and sliding in after it. His gloved hands folded together and were placed onto the table before him, settling into a comfy position. His gaze never faltered.

Tara took a slow, shuddery breath before nudging Reader’s side. “R.. Reader…”

Reader’s eyebrow twitched, a little stamp of tongue sticking out from between their lips in concentration. After making one final crease, Reader finally sat back against their seat in triumph, lifting the folded napkin up off the table. In their hands sat a little bat, its wings stretched out wide. “Look! It’s a little baby! A stinky sky puppy!” They grinned, little fangs flashing. They turned towards Tara, holding the creation out in front of her. “Tadaa!”

Tara shook her head, lazily swatting the napkin off their palm before taking their shoulder into her hand, pulling them closer to her. She tucked her face low, whispering into their ear. “That guy is back.”

Reader blinked, frowning when she had slapped the origami creature out of their hand. Rude.

It took a second longer for her words to register in their brain. “..Guy??” Prompted now, their head swiveled to the left and gave a surprised little jolt when the previously empty booth beside them was now preoccupied by the mystery man from the shadows. A shiver rolled down their back. Had he been staring at them the whole time?

.. They found it a little concerning that they found that a little exciting.

The bat had smacked into Dawn, making her sputter and swat it away from her, looking up to make a comment on it, but paused when she noticed that both Tara and Reader were looking off to the side. She followed their gaze, and laughed. “Look, it’s your boyfriend~” She winked at the vampire before returning to her phone.

Reader’s cheeks warmed a little at the teasing, but otherwise hadn’t looked away. They seemed to have entered a staring contest with the clown man. The rock music overhead still strummed along as their eyes stayed locked. They could already feel their own eyes beginning to sting. How could he go this long without blinking?? Honestly they were beginning to feel pretty impressed. Reader’s ears twitched as the sound of the shop owner’s voice sounded in the background, him talking to a new caller. “I told you this a week ago.” He spoke, tone irritable. “We’ll go to your mother’s…. I don’t know, six weeks from now.”

The clown didn’t seem to notice anything else in his environment, fully focused on the vampire sitting across from him. Slowly, his head tilted to the side, gaze never breaking. Almost instantly, Reader did the same, head slowly tilting to the side, mirroring the stranger. Something about the exchange felt so … intimate. In a way that Reader could neither comprehend nor explain. A smile broke across their face.

The clown stayed absolutely stationary, but Reader didn’t miss the way the black corner of his mouth twitched upward.

The pizza man seemed to have finally taken notice of his newest customer and tugged the phone away from his face. “Ey I’ll be right with ya, buddy!” Not a second later he was mumbling back into the receiver, scoffing under his breath. “You gotta see the shape of this fuckin’ guy that just walked in.”

If the stranger had heard any of the man’s words, he didn’t give any indication that he had. He stayed, frozen in time, as still as a professional New Yorker statue performer. Which is why it made Reader jolt again in surprise when suddenly he sat rod straight in his seat, shoulders pulling back and flashing a bright grin at Reader. Were his teeth that red before?

The goofy face and the absurdity of the situation had Reader finally snapping. Their face cracked into a wide grin, fangs flashing brightly as they released a sudden burst of laughter, lifting a hand up to cover their teeth. The clown’s head tilted again, their odd reaction seeming to catch him off guard. His grin faltered for a moment, eyes searching the giggling vampire trying desperately to muffle their noise. Slowly, his red and black toothed grin stretched even wider, dark eyes crinkling as an actual authentic smile took over his face. Oh, he liked that reaction… he liked that a lot.

Tara had been keeping her eye set on the stranger as well, not trusting anything about him. Something was off about him, she just knew it. Reader’s sudden outburst of giggles made her damn near leap out of her skin in surprise, snapping to look their way. Did they not see it too? Even with the way he’s been just oogling them??

She dropped her hand back onto their shoulder, swiftly pulling them back to facing her. She lowered her head to them, aggravation etched heavily in both her expression and voice as she hissed to them. “Reads, stop it. He’s fucking creepy. You’re only making it worse!”

The vampire only shook their head in dismissal, waving her off with a lighthearted smile. “Oh it’s fine, T. He’s just playing around.”

“It’s creepy.” She repeated, not relenting.

“I think it’s pretty charming, really. Look!” When they both turned to look at the clown again, his position changed once again. His elbows were planted into his table, gloved hands had their fingers laced together for his pointed chin to settle right on top of them, smiling brightly at Reader as if he had been waiting for them to look at him again. Their pleased reaction made his grin widen just that much. Reader returned the toothy smile, cheeks warming under the heavy attention. It wasn’t something they were used to, and in most circumstances made them uncomfortable, but the way the monochromatic stranger looked at them so warmly had their chest doing.. something. Something they couldn’t quite put their finger on, but it sure did feel fluttery. Exciting. They easily fell back into another eye lock with the stranger, enjoying the silly faces he pulled, and the rather cute toothy smile.

Tara gulped silently, painted lips twitching into a harder frown. Something was wrong about this. He was wrong. Everything about him was wrong. She didn’t like how his eyes bore so deeply into Reader. She shook her head, short black hair gently fluttering along with the movement. Reader’s second burst of giggling after the clown made yet another weird face – this time, he lifted a knuckle up to his large hooked nose and gave it a little cranking motion, sticking his nasty tongue out, face scrunched – made her shudder, arms wrapping around her middle.

Almost miraculously, The scarecrow finally pulled her nose out from her phone screen again. Her brow furrowed as she took in Tara’s tense posture. “Are you okay?” She received no answer, and turned her head to follow their gaze to, surprise surprise, see that the clown was still upsetting her. Reader seemed fine enough, so why couldn’t she be?

Tara slowly pulled her eyes off of him to finally look back at her friend across the table, gaze hard. “I think we should get our food to go.”

“Why?” Dawn frowned back, not at all pleased with the idea of leaving after they’ve just got settled down. She followed the skeleton’s stiff gaze as it flicked back across Reader and landed on the clown man once again. “Him?”

As far as Dawn could see, the guy was just a fucked up looking weirdo. Reader seemed into it enough, so what was the deal? She didn’t want to get up just because some ugly guy had the hots for their friend. She knew Tara could be a little protective of them – and her, on occasion – but jesus, sometimes too far was too far.

“Seriously, I wanna leave.”

An annoyance dripped off Dawn as she yanked her phone off the table and pulled out from the booth. “Jesus christ.”

Tara’s heart dropped again that night, feeling a cold sweat forming as Dawn made her way to the clown. “D, stop.”

She took no heed of Tara’s empty words as she stood in front of the guy. Despite her being literally right there in front of him, he seemed completely zeroed in on Reader, eyes not wavering for a millisecond off of them. God, this freak had it bad, huh. “Um, excuse me. Excuse me.” Dawn batted his arm. It was like she was just a gust of wind, because he didn’t acknowledge her existence. Or anything, for that matter, outside of Reader.

Reader blinked when Dawn scooted herself in front of the clown, brow raised in curiosity. What was she planning to do? They certainly hoped that she wasn’t planning to bully or embarrass him, as she was pretty known to do every so often. It’s not like he was doing anything wrong, so what was the problem?

The man didn’t seem to see a problem. Hell, his dark gaze stayed absolutely locked onto them, even with Dawn lowering her hand to hover right in his face and beginning to snap loudly not two inches away from his face. He didn’t even blink, painted lips tilted upward and eyes lidded lightly as he stared deep into their soul. It… made a shiver crawl down their body, though definitely not an unwelcome one. They swallowed, feeling the air between them become more and more intimate the longer his lidded eyes glued to them. Hoh boy.

“Can I get a picture with you??” Dawn persisted, head tilting until it completely covered his eye’s path, golden hair falling from her shoulders and down in a curtain, further blocking his way. Reader suddenly took in a breath of air, not realizing that they had been holding it for the majority of their locked gazes. Had their heart been pounding in their chest this whole time?? Slowly they placed a hand over their chest, as if to steady the beating muscle.

Dawn’s light irritation grew when the clown’s gaze seemed to stare right through her, as if she were just air. You’ve got to be fucking kidding.

“Dawn, come on.” Tara urged, hugging herself tighter.

“Shut up.” She waved her off like a pesky fly, trying to grab the clown’s attention again. “Hello? Helloooo??” She blinked in annoyance. Finally she reached out and grasped his closest arm, lifting it out of the way and dropping it over the back of his booth seat. “Okay, I’m gonna take that as a ‘yes.’” She surged forward, plopping herself right onto his thigh, moving to press her faux straw covered chest against his, making herself comfortable. Reader blinked in surprise at Dawn’s sudden invasion. They frowned at her, suddenly feeling heavily shameful at her intrusion of his personal space, as if they made her do it. “Jesus, Dawn! Sir I-I’m sorry, she’s..” Their words tapered off when his deep, dark eyes once again met theirs when Dawn took her seat on him, moving out of the way. They became flustered once again. Even with their rambunctious, personal-bubble-popping friend making herself cozy on his lap, his attention never faltered, never waned, never blinked. Reader felt their face beginning to heat up once again. Why did that make them feel so warm??

The scarecrow wiggled, making herself comfortable and preparing him for their photo shoot. She reached up and began tugging on the little black hat that sat on top of his head, purposely pulling until the string that held it in place around his head snapped against his face, hat dropping from her hold and tumbling to the floor. The pop from the string seemed to finally, finally break him of his concentrated gaze, slowly turning to look at the blonde who invaded his personal space. The lidded, pleased stare from before fell into something cold and unreadable, mouth falling flat. Tara shuddered at how quick his expression fell.

“Uh, oh.” Dawn reached a hand up, tapping a finger on the tip of his hooked nose, right on the little black dot that sat there. “Sorry.” She batted her golden lashes at him innocently, not at all registering the cold, unimpressed glare he laid on her as she bent over, swiping the little hat off of the tiled floor and setting it right back onto his head. His head slowly lowered, glare seeming to get icier when she wrapped an arm around his shoulders and arch her chest up, pressing it right against his own as she posed. Her arm stretched out with her phone in hand, clicking as she began taking pictures with him. Her hair effectively covered half of his face, sticking to the white and black makeup.

Tara couldn’t believe Dawn, shaking her head in disapproval, hand reaching up to rub at her neck anxiously. Of course the outgoing brat would pull some shit like this, just to rub Tara’s fears and concerns right in her face. It was times like these that seriously made her question their friendship.

Dawn pulled away from the camera to look back over to the clown, suddenly snatching his chin in her hand, squishing his prominent cheeks inward until his black painted lips puckered outward. Pleased, she turned back to the screen and puckered her own lips into a duck face, pressing the side of her face against his and taking two more pictures with him. He stared coldly into the camera. When the scarecrow decided that she’s had enough, she released his chin from her grasp, a fake smile flashing as she tapped his nose once again. “Thanks.”

She pulled herself out of his lap without another word, returning to their booth. The man stayed frozen in the spot she maneuvered him in, arm still slung over the back of the booth, frown prominent. Reader frowned with concern. They knew Dawn could be a bit much, especially to people who weren’t already used to her antics. They hoped that the stranger wasn’t too upset with her forwardness.

Tara fixed Dawn with an icy glare when she slid back into her seat. “What the hell is wrong with you??”

Dawn grinned, already beginning to post the pictures onto her media. Her followers will definitely get a kick out of this weirdo. “What, didya think he was gonna hack me up into little pieces or something?” She scoffed, as if the very notion was ridiculous, thumbs tapping away.

Reader sighed, raising a hand to rub their nose bridge. “D, really. Silence doesn't equal consent. You shouldn’t have done that, and you know it.” She rolled her eyes and sent a short sneer Reader’s way before burying back into her Instagram. “Not you too, now. Relax, it’s not like I fucked your little boyfriend or whatever.”

Both Tara and they cringed and Dawn’s crude words. Jesus, she really had a way to make people uncomfortable.

By the time the pizza man had hung up on his call and made his way over to the clown, the mystery man had shifted back to his previous objective of fixing Reader with a rather smoldering stare, hands clasped together again and settled on the table. “What can I get for ya, buddy?”

To nobody’s surprise, the clown didn’t answer or even acknowledge the shop keep, only keeping his eyes locked on Reader. They tilted their head once again, feeling warm under his gaze. Was it getting a little hot in here?? It was beginning to feel so bizarre, how his eyes could go from iceberg cold to blazing warm with just a mere glance.

The pizza man’s patience seemed to already be thinned by the previous calls, making his tone snap a little when he pressed further. “Hey. Hello?? If you don’t order anything, you’re gonna have to leave.”

“You already have eight liiiikes~” Dawn tapped her phone screen with her nail, making a light clack, clack noise as she called over to the clown in a singsong voice. Her comments were already beginning to flood, asking about the creep.

“Can you hear me in there?” The man pressed further, lowering himself until his face was eye to eye with the clown, trying to grasp his attention like Dawn had. But just like he had the scarecrow, his dark eyes zeroed right past the shop keep, as if locked into tunnel vision and Reader was the only focus. They shifted a little in their seat, biting their lip and studying the clown. Seconds later, the pizza man gave up, standing up straight and dropping his hands in exasperation. “Oh god, it’s gonna be a long night,” he grumbled, walking back into the kitchen.

Reader’s eyes trailed after the shop keep as he walked off, before flicking back to the clown. They fumbled with their fingers a little, brows furrowed in concern. The poor guy must be so uncomfortable now, making them feel for him. They shuffled in their seat again, as if working themself up to talk to him. Finally, they found their nerves and opened their black painted lips. “Hey, um.. are you alright? Dawn can delete those pictures, if they make you uncomfortable. I’m sorry about all that.”

“Tch, like hell I will,” the girl injected, scoffing. She tossed her hair over her shoulder with a flick of her head, not bothering to pull up from her cellphone. “Everyone’s eating this shit up.” Reader’s eyebrow twitched in mild irritation, fingers tapping hard on the table before them in an attempt to relax themself. Maybe if their fingers wiggled around, they’d lose the sudden urge to wrap them around her throat.

The clown’s head tilted slightly to the side, eyes boring into theirs for a moment or two longer, before suddenly sliding out of his booth, standing up tall. They leaned back slightly, taken aback. They didn’t expect him to be so tall. Tara tensed beside them as they both watched the man approach one of the other empty booths. The table still had paper plates with crumbs and pizza crusts on it. In the middle lay a small pile of money, a dollar bill and coins for a tip. The clown looked over his shoulder at Reader and back at the table, as if making sure that they were watching him. And watch him they did, both confusion and curiosity painting their face.

His dirty fingertips that were uncovered by the rest of his gloves reached down, pinchin the quarter off the table, and lifted it up. The overhead lights caught on its face, making the coin shine a little as he held it up for them to see. He then made a show of turning on his heel until they were facing his back, taking a knee in front of the toy capsule vending machine slots that sat right next to the entrance to the little shop. Reader leaned to the side, trying to see what he was doing. Tara only shook her head, squeezing her thin arms around herself as if for protection, sinking lower into the booth seat.

The sound of the quarter slotting into the machine and the loud cranking of the knob made their eyebrows raise higher. Was he getting himself a toy??

The clown took a moment to crack open the capsule, plucking the item out of its container, before swiftly pulling himself up from the tiled floor. With a giddy smile, he nearly skipped his way back over to the trio’s booth before once again taking a knee, kneeling in front of Reader. Tara pressed herself against the pale brick wall in agitation. The man’s movements caught Dawn’s attention and she looked up from her screen, wanting to see what would happen next.

He raised the toy up for Reader to see, other hand waving at it in a silent ‘tadaa!’ Between his index and thumb fingers rested a little ring, metal with two hearts stuck side by side. He grinned expectantly at Reader, gesturing to the ring.

Reader leaned further back into their booth seat, blinking in surprise. Was.. was this for them?? Oh, that was rather cute. Their face began warming again as their eyes flickered between the ring and the clown’s face, lips parted in silent question. From across the table Dawn snickered, not believing what she was seeing. “Aww.”

“I-is that for me?” They asked shyly, lips beginning to quirk upward.

The clown nodded gleefully, showing off the ring once more, before holding up a finger in a ‘hold on’ gesture. Before they knew it, the mysterious man was reaching out and taking their hand in his, making Reader’s breath catch in their throat.

Tara’s shoulders lifted up, putting her own hands on top of the table’s surface. “What are you doing??”

The clown paid no mind to her as he lifted up Reader’s hand with care. Another shiver ran down their spine when they realized just how much bigger his hand was compared to their own. Slowly, the clown slid the double hearted ring onto their ring finger, until it finally rested at the base of their digit. He held their hands a moment longer, as if admiring the metal adjourning their finger, rubbing his large thumb over it. With flourish he released their hand and waved his own around it, as if showcasing the little thing with pride. His head tilted to the side, smiling almost bashfully as his hands came down to clasp over his chest in adoration, eyes lidding.

Reader’s face burned hot through the whole transaction, mouth fallen open. Oh, oh that was just precious. A bright, toothy smile stretched across their heated face, lifting their other hand to cover over their mouth, bashful. “Oh, oh my. This is so sudden. I do!” They giggled, eager to play along with the silly, silly man. Their words had him shimmying his shoulders almost shyly, red teeth glinting brightly under the lights.

Suddenly Reader’s eyes widened in realization. “Oh, just a sec!”

They pulled their cross body bag up into their lap, sticking their tongue out as they dug around for what they were looking for. The clown watched curiously, hands still pressed to his chest in endearment. Once they finally caught hold of what they were searching for, they smiled wider, pulling it out and holding it up for him to observe.

In their hold was a little plastic spider ring, one that they had collected off of the cupcakes they scarfed down at the party. They loved it when the treats had little garnish toys and picks, especially when they were silly little rings. Apparently holding onto the thing was a good decision, because the way the clown’s dark eyes lit up at the sight of it had their chest feeling that certain little fluttery warmth from before.

“Reads-” Tara began nervously from beside them, not liking this one bit. It was bad enough that the creep came over to initiate the act, but they didn’t have to encourage him! Reader paid her no mind as they carefully took hold of the clown’s hand, much like he had theirs. With a soft smile, they slid the ring onto his much larger finger. They couldn’t push it up very far, what with the rest of his glove stopping them, but it was on nonetheless. “See? Now we match!”

Dawn was pressing her hands over her mouth, trying desperately to stifle her loud laughter and the absurd act that was taking place in front of her. The clown slowly retracted his hand to hold it up to his face, expression soft as he turned his hand in different angles, admiring the little plastic spider as if it were a three carat diamond ring.

Reader smiled, pleased with the soft expression of happiness he held. “I know it’s not as fancy as mine, but I hope it’ll suffice?”

Their words seemed to snap the stranger out of his haze, blinking for the first time that night as he’s brought back from whatever he had been thinking. With flourish, he took hold of their hand once more, lowering himself further to press a kiss to their ring. Tara felt like she was about to be sick as the clown pressed kiss upon kiss on the little metal hearts, moving onto pressing his lips to their much smaller knuckles.

The vampire choked, sputtering at the sweet little kisses. Oh my god, oh my god that’s so cute??! Their face burned an entirely new shade of red and they began giggling in both bashfulness and disbelief, laughing harder when the clown began kissing up their hand and slowly making his way up their arm.

He never ceased and didn’t seem like he would, lacing his fingers with theirs and trailing his lips up their sleeved arm to their shoulder, trying not to smile too hard as he did so. Their laughter cracked into a gasp at the feeling of his lips landing on their uncovered collar bone, lips leaving a black smudge in his wake. Oh shit, oh fuck, when did it get so damn HOT in here???

“Hey, you can’t-!” Tara sat up straight, wrapping her hands around Reader’s arm closest to her and yanking them towards her, pulling them away from his creepy attacks. They gave a surprised yelp at the sudden interruption, whipping back to look at Tara. The clown’s curved eyebrows shot up high when they were pulled away from his grasp, parted lips suddenly pulling into a snarl. He slowly pulled up from his knees and stood ramrod straight, staring over Reader’s head at Tara, fixing her with the chilliest, most hateful glare she had ever been given. Her eyes widened in fear.

“Oh shit??” Dawn choked, fumbling with her phone in her hands, quickly swiping until her camera was pulled up. If any drama was going to go down, she’d be damned if she didn’t record it!

“Ey, what seems to be the problem ov-” The pizza man returned, hands holding paper plates of large slices of pizza. The clown’s threatening, towering stance and nasty bearing teeth had him pausing. “Oh hell no, I don’t think so, pal!”

The shopkeeper plopped the plates onto the booth table behind them before gripping onto the clown, grabbing fistfulls of the back of his black and white costume and forcefully shoving him towards the front of the restaurant. “Fuckin’ FREAK! Get outta here!”

The trio all watched, wide eyed as the much shorter man shoved the clown out of the door, bell dinging as the clown stumbled into the street, whipping around in anger. The man quickly stepped back to snatch up the black trash bag that had sat in the booth, tossing it out with the clown. “Take your shit and don’t come back!”

Tara felt immensely better without having the creep hovering around them, but Reader stared through the glass door at their silly clown, hands clutching onto the front of their chest. What had happened?? They just looked away for a moment, what could the clown have possibly done to warrant such a forced leave?? They were just playing around, that wasn’t bad, was it? Their shoulders fell, unsure of what to even think.

The clown stood fuming, fists clenched tightly into balls at his side. His head snapped back to glare through the glass, but fell short when Reader’s crestfallen face caught his eye. His shoulders and hands slowly released their tension as he met their searching eyes.

Slowly he lifted both of his gloved hands up, pressing them against the cool glass and leaned his face in. Reader watched, brows beginning to knit together, lips parting. Just what was he planning to do? He couldn’t come back in.

Reader’s mental question was quickly answered as the clown’s tongue fell out of his opened maw, and slowly dragged it up the glass, hot breath fogging around the muscle’s path. His wide eyes stayed locked onto theirs the whole time, pulling back only to repeat, running his tongue slowly up the glass.

Their jaw fell completely open, face feeling so hot that the color was surely spreading to their ears and down their chest. Not once did they look away. They couldn’t. Not with how heavy his gaze had gotten. Not with the way his chest seemed to heave up and down as he breathed heavily. Not with the way his fingers gripped hard against the glass, as if struggling hard not to just rip the thing open to enter again. Not with the way he licked the glass like he wanted to do it to them.

They swallowed thickly, lifting their hand up to attempt to cover their flustered face, but it was much too late. The clown’s mouth twisted into a hungry grin. He already saw it.

And boy did he seem to like it.

“I said GET! GET OUTTA HERE!!” The man whipped back around when he noticed the trio still staring at the door. The man’s face grew a ruddy color as he grew angry. “I’ll call the police, freak!”

Slowly, oh so slowly, the clown removed his fingertips from the glass, pulling himself away from the door. He momentarily broke eye contact to haul the hefty black bag over his shoulders. When he looked back at Reader, he gave a toothy smirk and a saucy wink, fingers wiggling in a wave goodbye as he slowly left their eyesight.

“... Holy shit,” The scarecrow bursted out laughing, smacking the table. “Oh my GOD, that guy was obviously turned on by you!”

Tara finally sat up properly in the booth for the first time in what felt like hours, releasing a long breath and glaring heatedly at Dawn. “You’re fucking sick, you know that? That was insane. Insane! Right, Reads?”

Reader didn’t reply, staring at the wet strip on the door. They rubbed their cheeks bashfully, looking off to the side. Wow, what a night.

“You three okay?” The pizza man grabbed the paper plates from the other table, placing them in front of the trio. Dawn wasn’t hesitant to swipe her plate, beginning to fold her piece. “Oh, he’s harmless.”

Tara paused, but eventually gave a short nod, beginning to pick at her pizza’s toppings.

The man placed his hands on his hips, looking down at the vampire. “You okay?”

Reader fingered the little double hearted ring that still sat on their finger, nodding absentmindedly. That seemed to please the man well enough as he patted the back of their booth comfortingly. “Don’t worry ‘bout him, he won’t be comin’ back. I’ll make sure of that.”

The vampire hummed emptily at his words, not really feeling much comfort from them. They.. they really liked the silly clown guy. It was a shame that they couldn’t get to know him a little better. Now they’d probably never see him again. That thought alone had them sighing silently, propping their head up in their hand, leaning on the table disheartenedly. Tara side eyed them curiously, picking off bits of her slices and chewing them.

●・○・●・○・● ●・○・●・○・●

“And you’re sure you’ll be fine heading back by yourself?” Tara asked persistently, giving Reader a searching look, as if looking for any reason to walk them home. Lord knows they didn’t need another Halloween freak tailing after them like a lovesick dog.

Reader laughed quietly, patting her arm reassuringly. “Yes, mom. Seriously, I’m solid. My place is just a block away. You should worry about getting home yourselves.”

Dawn tucked her phone back into her patchwork pocket, stretching her arms high above her arms. “We’ll be fiiiiine. We’ll even text ya when we get there.” “That might be a little tough, considering my phone died a couple minutes ago,” they winced, smiling strainely. “I’ll put it on charge when I get home. G’night, guys!”

“See ya, babes.” Tara and Dawn parted, beginning their trek back to their ride. Reader let out a tired sigh and turned the opposite direction, walking down the sidewalk. The walk back wasn’t very difficult, but it did sting a bit from being in their pinching shoes all night. A bad decision on their end, really.

They climbed the steps to their apartment and paused at the door, sliding their hand into their bag to fish for their keys. They blinked in surprise when their fingers clacked against something.. rectangular??

Curiously, they grabbed hold of the thing and pulled it out, baffled.

When the hell did a VHS tape end up in their bag??

The next chapter(s) are still being worked on. I’m unsure when they’ll finally be finished, but just know that they ARE being worked on. I’m just trying to make it a nice, long read. I haven’t seen Terrifier 2, so if I write something in the next chapter that seems off with the new info, that’s why. I’m too short on muns right now from moving into my new apartment to go see the movie. (And boy lemme tell you just how SAD I am about it ;;;; )

#x reader #reader x character #slasher x reader #clown #art the clown x reader #coulrophilia #terrifier #all hallows eve #long post #ao3 #clown x reader #minors dni

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ohbo-ohno · 4 months

Text

happy new year's eve @luminousbeings-crudematter, here's another version of the purge au (4k) that i forgot i finished in the process of trying to get the first one done lol

(also when i said "it's essentially the same thing but with different smut" i meant... no smut. i didn't post this one bc i couldn't figure out what to do with the smut. but this has some kidnapping and overall rough creepiness!)

cw: noncon touching, kidnapping, graphic murder, blood & violence, unedited bc im lazy

The soles of your feet burn against the hot asphalt, even though the sun’s been set for hours. The flames roaring from the burning high school alongside you are enough to heat the ground, enough to leave you wincing with every step and trying your best to walk on your toes.

You’re not sure if the wetness on your cheeks is tears or blood, or some sick combination of both. You’d wipe it off to see, but your hands are covered in red, and you don’t want to smear it across your face.

It’s impossible not to flinch at the sudden sound of cackling laughter, some indeterminate distance away but clear as a bell. The laugh cuts off abruptly, followed by a high-pitched scream that makes you wince. You speed up as much as you can, breath shuddering in your chest. You feel a few tears slip down your cheeks, just adding to the tacky mixture already covering your face.

The street is crowded with Purgers, people wearing all sorts of different gear to make themselves seem as terrifying as possible. You’d feel lacking in your black pants and shirt, if you wanted any attention like them. Instead you pray that whoever’s looking for fun won’t focus on you, that you’ll disappear with so many other distractions out tonight.

The sound of a chainsaw revving makes you shudder, and you tuck your arms close to your chest.

You can’t believe you were stupid enough to come out on Purge night, but there’s no use dwelling on that now, not when you’re still blocks away from home with absolutely no way to defend yourself.

You should’ve known your friend - your now very dead friend - didn’t have good intentions. She’d invited you out with her to vandalize your most recent ex’s house, and like an idiot you’d agreed and walked yourself right into a trap. Your only defense is that you’d had a few drinks before leaving your perfectly safe apartment, in hopes of forgetting all the screams you’d hear outside. It’s the only reason you can think that you were so quick to agree when you’ve got absolutely no way of defending yourself.

Her blood is still wet on your hands. You don’t feel bad about her death, and that makes you feel sick. You’d never thought you’d be the kind of person to actually partake in the Purge, let alone kill during it, but here you are - stumbling home covered in blood with two deaths on your hands. The fact that it was self-defense isn’t nearly as much of a comfort as you need to make your heart beat less erratically, to make the blood stop burning against your skin.

The quick flashes of their deaths won’t stop playing on repeat in your mind - you would’ve died if you’d been any less lucky, and you doubt your piece of shit ex would have made it quick.

If you hadn’t caught them together - your friend fucking him in the bed you used to sleep in, that fucking bitch - you might not have had the anger necessary to kill them. Might not have had the rage, the energy, to stab them both until they stopped screaming.

Your arms already ache from the force you’d used. You can’t stop seeing your friend’s face, torn to shreds beneath you, blood splattering up onto your own face and neck while your ex’s corpse cooled beside you. You’re not sure if you’re hearing her screams still, or if someone nearby is suffering just like she had.

The only thing you can bring yourself to regret is leaving behind the knife. It would come in handy now, as you walk alone down one of the poorest neighborhoods in your city.

It would come in especially handy as a hand grabs your shoulder, yanking you to the side and into an alleyway, shoving you against rough bricks and ignoring your yelp.

“Well, well, look’it you…” the man drawls, his face hidden by a bright red skull and a black hood covering the rest of his head. “Wha’s a bonnie lass like you doin’ out tonight, all alone?”

You can’t speak, heart thudding painfully at your ribcage as you blink up at him. He’s all you can see, just a bright red skull floating in place.

“Please,” you manage to gasp, hands shakily raised in front of your chest.

“Please? Please what?” His words are sharp, almost bitten off, and he leans closer. “Haven’t even threatened ye yet, pretty thing. What’re you beggin’ for?”

You whimper as he leans closer, hardly inches away from your face, and a loud boom from somewhere nearby shakes the wall at your back. You still can’t tell if it’s blood or tears dripping down your face. You jump at the sound, and your chest hits his. Before you can move back, his hands are on your shoulders, keeping you pressed to him.

“Oh, did that scare you?” He coos, patronizing and mean. “You a little scaredy cat, all alone and afraid?”

You sob, hands pushing at his chest, and he makes a sound somewhere between a hum and a laugh, pushes you against the wall without pulling even an inch away.

“No, no, you’re not goin’ anywhere. ‘S not safe out there for you, kitty. It was so easy to grab you, you want someone else to get a hold of you? They won’t be as nice as me, I can tell you that.”

“Get- get off!”

He laughs, loud and rough, right in your face. “Oh, I’ll be gettin’ off, kitty. Might take some teamwork, huh? A good way to get to know my new friend-”

He cuts himself off with a sharp Oh! as your knee jerks up into his crotch, the man doubling over in pain and groaning as his head comes to rest against the wall by your face. You barely have enough sense left in you to duck out of his way before his body goes limp against the wall, hand cupping your target.

“Fuckin’ bitch,” you hear him hiss, right before you stumble away, legs weak as you put all your energy into not tripping over your own feet. Your only thought is getting out of the alley, even though being more exposed is probably riskier than just taking your chances with the man in the red skull. Still, there’s some instinct at the back of your mind telling you go, run, and you’re not stupid enough to ignore it.

You hardly make it five steps away before you hit a wall - no, not a wall, a person.

It’s almost comical, the way you bounce off of him and stumble backwards, losing your balance on weak knees and sending yourself straight to the ground. He’s a monolith above you, a massive figure clothed in all black, the light from the flames behind him almost making him glow. He’s all black cloth and white mask, a skull hovering well past six feet in the air.

The sight of him makes your heart stutter, brings everything into acute focus around you, slowing the world down to a near stop. That same instinct at the back of your mind tells you this man is worse than the last, that you should’ve taken your chances with the red skull.

You’re jerked back and to the side, shoved roughly against the brick wall. Your face scrunches up at the rough texture against your cheek, your torso flush against the wall and the first man flush against your back. You manage to open one eye and track the new man, your other forced shut from the way your head is angled.

The white skull tilts, and its wearer steps closer. You can’t help the small cry you let out, the way you flinch back into the first man like he’ll do anything but expose you more. His hands are rough on you, one hand locked around the back of your neck and the other harsh on your hip.

The body behind you laughs, push further into the wall regardless of the stinging pain as the white skull steps closer. He stops hardly a foot away, when your vision is eclipsed by only him. You try to struggle against the hands holding you, whimpering when they dig in more harshly.

“You got her?” A voice asks, and it takes a minute for you to realize it’s the new man in front of you.

“Yeah,” the first man pants, holding you close and alleviating some of the pressure against your cheek. “Woulda caught her without you, y’know. She just caught me off guard.”

The white skull rumbles low in his chest, a rejection. You’re not sure if he’s got faith in your ability to escape, or doesn’t trust his partner’s ability to chase. He’s close enough that you can only see the black of his chest, close enough that you can watch him breathe.

“I’m sure. You got a good hold on her?”

The hands squeeze, you can’t help but make a sound disturbingly close to a squeal, and- “Yeah, course, got her tight to me, Ghost. She’s not goin’ anywhere.” There’s an air of desperation in Red’s voice, a strained tension underlying every word. He’s almost eager, but it’s all directed towards the man in front of you - Ghost - instead of towards the prospect of hurting you.

Ghost doesn’t respond, but he steps close enough to press his chest against your shoulder. The three of you are all less than a foot apart, and there’s absolutely nothing you can do to get away. Another tear slips down your cheek.

You can feel Red’s chest heaving behind you, and at first you can’t understand why - he hasn’t had to chase you, hasn’t had to fight, there’s no reason for him to be out of breath.

It hits you when you feel the hard plastic of his mask press into the top of your head. He’s eager, and it’s making him pant like a dog. You’d bet he’s drooling behind the mask and the thought makes you shiver.

You flinch when a gloved hand cups your chin, tugging your face up so you’re staring into the eye sockets of the mask.

His eyes are dark brown, so dark that you almost can’t see them past the shadows and the paint over his skin. The flames roar behind him, giving him a monstrous glow.

“Pretty thing,” he hums, chest rumbling against your side. You try to push away from him, but there’s nowhere to go. “You’re gonna be our little toy for the night. Things’ll get worse for you if you try to run. You hearin’ me?”

It’s pure instinct to nod, to give this man what he wants, but you know you’ll still try to run the second they look away.

“Alright then. Let’s get you home. Johnny,” the man steps away, jerking his head in clear instruction for Johnny to follow and turning away. “Come.”

“Right behind ye,” Red - Johnny - assures, that same eagerness in his tone as he tugs you away from the wall, trotting behind his partner. “It’s gonna be a great night, lass. You and I are gonna have fun.”

You can’t help but whimper at that, letting your body go nearly limp as the man drags you by the elbow. You can’t even fathom the horrors they’ve got in store for you, what fun is to two men hunting for lone girls on Purge night.

You try to let your feet drag, but they hurt too much for that to last long. You consider going limp, making them carry you, but you’re too scared that they’ll just drag you across the concrete and let you bleed.

You only manage to keep up with Johnny because he doesn’t give you another choice. You’re practically hobbling from the pain in your feet, forced to walk on the balls of your feet and lean your weight into his hand where it’s wrapped tight around your arm. He doesn’t give you any slack, doesn’t even seem to notice when you struggle to match his pace.

The three of you have walked several blocks - you can’t quite focus enough to count - keeping to the sides of buildings and dodging other people, when you’re tackled to the ground out of nowhere.

It’s impossible to stop the blood-curdling shriek from leaving your throat. Your bare arms feel torn to shreds as you slide across the ground, head bouncing off the ground and leaving you with black spots dancing across your vision.

You’re hardly able to blink, body alight with pain, and the heavy weight over you only serves to make your panic worse. You moan as you roll your neck, staring wide-eyed up at the dark sky and praying the ringing in your ears isn’t permanent.

Your vision is just starting to clear when the man on top of you - and he’s definitely a man, he’s not even wearing a mask and his expression is mean and you find yourself glad you can’t hear what he’s saying - jerks back, his head pulled back until all you can see is his bared throat.

You can hardly even register what’s happening in the next few seconds. Some distant, detached part of you can recognize that someone slits the man’s throat, that his blood comes gushing out and covers your face.

The first sound you can hear again is your own screaming - it’s an ear splitting sound that melts from the ringing in your ears. When you gasp underneath the man, the corpse, you can feel his blood falling into your mouth. Every breath tastes like iron, and the world is tinted pink from the drops of it falling from your brows.

You can do nothing but pant and shake when the corpse is thrown off of you, replaced immediately by Johnny. You can hardly focus on him, are only really aware enough to know he’s there.

“Hush, bonnie, yer fine,” he scolds, one big hand coming up to cover your mouth, pinky and ring finger holding your jaw shut. “Wanna draw people over? Ye wanna see me and Ghost kill someone else for you, ‘s that it?”

You shake your head on instinct, tears running down your temples, dampening your hair. Your chest aches with the force of your breaths, nose congested from all the crying.

“Then hush,” he hisses, face so close that you can feel the breaths from his nostrils. You flinch at the loud sound of gunshots disturbingly nearby, desperately pushing against his body to try and see what’s going on. You can hear grunts and moans, the sound of something heavy hitting the ground, and your heart races.

Then, the sounds stop. It doesn’t go silent - not with other Purgers still out, still killing - but the area you’re trapped in is quiet again. Johnny drops a little more of his weight onto you, making it even harder to breathe.

You have to focus on every breath, deliberately making sure you get enough air so that your lungs stop aching. You only notice the movement on top of you after nearly a minute of slow breathing.

Johnny’s hips grind slow and steady against your stomach, and it makes you sick to realize you can feel his erection through his pants. His chest rises and falls with harsh breaths, and his movements are just harsh enough to force your body to move with his.

There’s absolutely nothing you can do about it. Not with shock settling in, his weight holding you pinned to the ground, and the pain in your head shifting to something closer to a migraine. All you can do is focus on your breathing and stare up at the stars.

“Johnny,” Ghost eventually calls, and you can hear him kick what you can only assume to be a corpse out of the way. You can’t help but whimper when he crouches nearby, his boots splattered with blood. “What do you think you’re doing?”

“Need-” Johnny gasps, hips stuttering against you before working even more quickly. “Needed to feel her, fuck, Ghost, she’s so fuckin’ soft. Can’t wait to be inside, to fuck her full, feel her squeeze-”

You whine against the hand over your mouth, trying to pull your face away from his grip and only succeeding in dragging your sensitive head across the harsh concrete.

“You’re gonna fuck her out here, where anyone can see? Doubt you’ll be able to keep her safe when you’re pussydrunk.”

Johnny moans above you, dropping more of his weight on each thrust. “Tha’s why you’re here, yeah? To keep me and the lass safe?”

Ghost grunts, fisting a hand in the strip of hair left revealed by Johnny’s mask. “Don’t be a fuckin’ brat, Johnny. You know I don’t have to do shit for you - either of you. Maybe I want to see my mutt get all defensive, growlin’ over his girl. You ever think about that?”

The whine that slips from Johnny’s throat is nothing less than pathetic, his pace becoming uneven as his eyes screw shut behind the mask. “C’mon, Ghost, I’m close, just let me… just watch for another minute, yeah?”

The scoff from Ghost is mean, and even you feel the absurd desire to try and placate the man. He stands abruptly, stepping away from where you’re pinned and leaving you staring at the cooling corpse of a man you don’t recognize.

“You do whatever you want, puppy. Stay here and get yourself off or behave and heel. You know what you’ll get either way.”

You can’t help but furrow your eyebrows as Johnny hisses out shit above you, hips working desperately against you for a few long moments before he drops his entire body weight onto you, knocking the air out of you.

“Okay,” he whispers, seemingly to himself. “Okay, alright, it’s fine. It’s fine.”

He pulls himself away from you with a long oan, pushing up until there’s no place the two of you are touching but you’re still entirely caged in by him. He takes his hand off your mouth to hold himself up and you wince at the string of blood between his hand and your lips.

“Not gonna fuck ye yet, kitty,” he tells you, staring into your eyes with an intensity you don’t quite know what to do with. “Ghost’ll make the both of us regret it, and ye don’t deserve that on your first night home.”

You hardly manage to bite back a whimper. “Please…”

His eyes crease, like he’s smiling beneath the mask. “God, yer so scared, aren’t ye? I can fucking taste it in the air, kitty. It’s delicious. Cannae fuckin’ wait to have you on my tongue.” You shudder, eyes dropping to his neck when his gaze becomes too heavy.

He forces you to stand before you’re ready, leaving you to lean on him if only to avoid crumbling to the ground like a ragdoll. You ite your tongue against a sob at the sight of three corpses around you, a twisted sense of appreciation and disgust warring in your mind.

Johnny herds you like a dog, pushing you by the small of your back and your shoulders as he tries to catch back up with his partner. You’re left stumbling in front of him, unsure and terrified, not quite strong enough to think running away would be a good idea. It doesn’t take long for you to spot Ghost’s large back on the street in front of you, and a part of you resents the fact that he’s already so recognizable.

He’s an overeager shadow, unable to decide if he wants to tug you forward or chase you from behind. He ends up almost circling you, shifting from your back to your side to your front and back again, always moving, always rushing. It leaves you unstable and nervous, unable to predict what he'll do next.

Chills run down your spine at the thought of this man… taking you. If you’re this terrified of him fully clothed, you’re loath to think of how you’ll react when he gets you where he wants you.

The two of you only manage to catch up to Ghost because he stops for a cigarette. His pale jaw is exposed when he tugs the mask up enough, and you try your best to memorize the scars covering his face, telling yourself that you’ll remember him, that you’ll never let him near you again once this night is over.

The look he sends Johnny is approving, the look he sends you is distinctly smug. It makes your teeth grind, makes you really wish you still had that knife so you could lurch forward, thrust the blade into the solid center of him and twist, pull out again and aim a little higher, then again, then again, then again-

“Made your choice, then?”

“Yes, sir. Wanna be good.”

Ghost hums, flicking the butt of his cig then dropping it to the ground, the cherry still glowing. “Settin’ a good example for your girl, huh? That’s my boy.”

The sound Johnny makes is animalistic, and despite the harsh grip he’s got on your arm you try to lean as far away as possible. There’s a building energy under his skin, a twitch in his fingers, that unnerves the animal part of your brain in ways Ghost doesn’t.

“‘Course. Gonna teach her how to be good, too, gonna keep her perfect for us.”

Ghost is completely stoic with the mask tugged back over his face, nothing but his heavy gaze as he stares you down. It’s hard not to jerk away from Johnny and run, no matter how futile you know the effort would be.

He reaches out a big, gloved hand towards your face, moving quickly enough that you can’t fully flinch away and hide your face in your shoulder or chest. His thumb strokes across your cheekbone, smearing the sticky mess of liquid across your face and huffing a sound just loud enough for you to hear.

“Cat got your tongue, girl?” He rumbles, a faint note of something in his voice lost in the sounds of anarchy behind you.

You try to shake your head, unable to manage anything more than a, “Please.”

Johnny scoffs beside you, wrapping both of his massive arms around your shoulders and holding you close. “Broken record, this one. Hasn’t said much else since we nicked her.”

“That’s alright,” Ghost rumbles, give Johnny one firm stroke over his mohawk. “I’m sure you’ll drag all sorts of pretty sounds out of her tonight. Now, let’s get goin’. Don’t want your little toy gettin’ her nerve up and earnin’ herself a punishment so early in the night. Come, now.”

Johnny laughs, loud and harsh as he tugs you to follow him and Ghost. You know you should be upset about what he’s said, know he should be doing exactly what he warns against and try to get away.

But you’ve got no energy left to fight. Everything hurts, your system is overrun by fear and just the tiniest drop of adrenaline, and your best chance of making it through this night is passing out and forgetting any of it ever happened.

A few tears, stragglers, drip down your cheeks when Johnny tugs you beside him. The places his fingertips squeeze against your arm have gone numb, and your feet feel like they’re on fire. Your arms are sluggishly bleeding and you’re not convinced you don’t have a concussion.

It’s hard to hold back sobs when you think of how much worse it’s going to get. Staring at the broad back of Ghost, feeling the feral energy of Johnny hardly contained by your side, all you can hope is that they let you survive the night.

You close your eyes as Johnny guides you, take a deep, steadying breath, and pray for your own strength. You tell yourself that maybe next year you can seek them out, find them at the very start of the Purge and get your revenge.

It’s a comforting enough daydream to lessen the aches of your body, to shine a spot of light after the hurricane of your future.

#this might very well be incomprehensible #when i say unedited i mean i haven't read this since i originally gave up on it #i just remember liking the way i wrote johnny and being said i wouldnt get to post it LMAO #anyways. no one say anything mean about it to me if it sucks #remember that this is not the first version i posted lmao #ghoap x reader #bo writes #dark fic #also sorry for the random tag lumi lmk if you want me to untag you lol

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lunarmoves · 2 months

Text

through pixel eyes (chapter one)

pairing: DCA sun/moon/eclipse x reader

mentions: kinitopet/virtual au, gender neutral reader, general creepiness

a/n: ignoring that it's 3am where i am... ch1's finally here! yippee!! ending is rushed but im tired so excuse it LOL pls check out the masterlist for more info on the fic (tags & summary). hope u guys enjoy! :D

word count: 5.3k+

masterlist

ao3 link

Click. Click. Taptap tap tap. Click.

You chew aimlessly at the bottom of your lip as your mouse roves over to the latest email in your inbox, opening it with another decisive click. Perking up slightly, your eyes skim through its contents, mindful of the zip file attached to it at the top.

Valued employee, the email reads, thank you again for your decision to assist Fazbear Entertainment in the latest beta testing stages for our developing proprietary technology. Attached is the file you are required to download to begin testing. As always, be mindful of the documentation you have signed previously; a failure to comply will result in immediate termination. Located at the bottom of this email is the submission form you will need to populate each time you conduct a run. If you have any questions or concerns, feel free to reply to this email. Have a Faz-errific day!

You hum and scroll back to the top of the email again so you can look at the attached file. FazPals1.1_DCA.zip, it says. You click the download button, then lean back in your chair as you wait.

For being such a large company, FazCo has a rather small beta testing team. You suppose it makes sense, though; their technology is so unparalleled that you are sure they’d want to keep information as closed off as possible. Hence why you’d been forced to sign all matters of forms—contracts, an N.D.A., and waivers, of all things—before they’d signed you on. You’re sure they are even more restrictive with their information after the pizzaplex burned down all those years ago. You’re lucky you’d managed to slither your way into their ranks to make the beta team, though you figure it helps that your resume is stacked with experience.

You are certainly curious as to what they’ve been doing while they parade assurances that the pizzaplex will return “better than ever.” You have a vague idea from your past emails with management as you were being incorporated into the beta testing team—some kind of interactive game of sorts, you think—but they’ve been rather hush-hush about it. Your answer resides in the zip file that’s just finished downloading to your computer. You navigate to your file explorer and begin the extraction process for the files. Luckily, it doesn’t take too long. You scratch idly behind your ear, shifting your headphones a little to rest more comfortably atop your head.

Okay. File open. Where is the— There! You double click on the FazPals_DCA.exe file to run it and begin installation. A brief glance at the time shows it is a little after six in the evening. You have quite a bit of time before you’ll need to head to bed. You’ll see how far into the program you get before you hit a checkpoint or something.

You watch as a tiny pink and white bear on the installation window flips a pizza over and over while the progress bar steadily inches its way to full completion. It is oddly hypnotizing. And when the program finally finishes installing, the window closes. An icon of a cool crescent moon tucked into the burning yellow of a sun appears on your desktop and is labeled as FazPals. Nice. Thank you, fast WiFi. Without much preamble, you double click on the icon.

A small window pops up in the middle of your screen. You glance through the text quickly.

Welcome to version 1.1 of FazPals, your very own virtual desktop friend based on the hit characters from Fazbear Entertainment's Mega Pizzaplex! They are able to walk, talk, joke, tell stories, give fun facts, adapt, and play games! FazPals are like no other with their innovative adaptive technology! You'll learn from them as they learn from you!

Click the button below if you are ready to meet your new FazPal!

Not what you’d been expecting, but it sounds pretty cool. It reminds you of the Tamagotchis from all those years ago—only with the A.I. of Fazbear-branded technology. Well! No time like the present! You click the ‘Proceed’ button and the window closes.

In the center of your screen, a small music box appears. It’s an unassuming little thing, wrapped in yellow with a red ribbon crossing over it to tie into a neat bow at the top. A crank awaits your click, so you do just that, watching as it rotates around and around until— Pop! The box opens and something jumps out of it with a flourish and a jingle of bells that echoes through your headset.

The box disappears and you’re left to stare curiously at the little figure swaying animatedly on your desktop. He seems to look around a bit, then a small dialogue box flashes over his head. But before you can read its contents, the box disappears in a static puff. You cock your head slightly. A glitch, maybe? You file that away for later and instead observe the tiny, taut grin of the program. Your FazPal, or whatever.

You recognize him from the pizzaplex commercials you’d seen on the television years ago—the Daycare Attendant. A fellow—fellows?—modeled after celestial bodies. You’re looking at the sun, currently, though his design is a bit different from what you remember seeing.

Before you can get a good look at him, however, another dialogue box pops up over his head with text accompanying a voice that chirps into your headset. You are momentarily surprised at the sound; you hadn’t expected FazCo to incorporate their voice module into the program too.

“Hellooo, New Friend!” Sun exclaims in a slightly pixelated manner—hardly noticeable, really—as he waves a small hand. “My name is Sun, your very own F-FazPal!” There’s a slight glitch on the word that makes his voice deepen slightly, but it passes easily enough. “What’s your name?”

Following his question, a window labeled ‘Name?’ pops up to his side with a textbox for you to input your answer. Figuring he isn’t going to proceed with his script until you type your answer, you take the moment to properly analyze his design.

Detached sunrays of white and gold hover around his head, framing bright eyes and an equally as bright smile on a face split into a crescent. He’s rather lithe, with a red sash tied around his waist that’s adorned with small, golden bells. Another bell is tied around his spindly neck with a red ribbon, and those same ribbons are tied around his wrists. His torso is bare and colored in different shades of yellow. Puffy red pants cover his legs—triangularly shaped with sharp lines and edges. They are decorated in a design that reminds you of the circuitry of a motherboard—dissecting lines connected by small circles that start from his waist and make their way down the length of his pants in a trickle. Pointy shoes with little suns on their sides finish the look.

He is all angles and unforgiving points, with a digitized sort of look to him that fits the whole ‘FazPal’ aesthetic, in your opinion. It’s certainly interesting. You like the futuristic feel to it.

Pulling yourself back to the present, you type in your name. Sun has his arms crossed behind his back as he waits, swaying gently side to side. You hit enter and the window disappears.

“Lovely name!” Sun chirps, his rays spinning around his head eagerly that you eye in interest. They look like floating pieces of fractured, stained glass, dainty yet deadly. “I’m sure we are going to be the bestest best friends!” You snort at the declaration.

“To start our little quest of friendship,” Sun continues on, his head moving towards the dialogue box that pops up near him like he’s looking at it, eyes narrow. It’s honestly difficult to tell with that blank gaze of his. He returns his gaze to the front, where his eyes upturn into little crescents. “Why don’t we get to know each other? Sound good?”

Another window appears with two simple buttons sitting next to each other under it: A ‘Yes’ and a ‘No’. You click the ‘Yes’ and Sun gives an excited little clap of his hands. It’s cute, in a way. “Wonderful! Okay! To start, what iiisss your favorite color?” The open window closes, then reopens to a textbox again with the new question displayed at the top. You hum and tap your chin thoughtfully, then let your fingers fly across your keyboard as you type the color in.

You pause, however, before you hit enter and decide to tack on a ‘hbu?’ to your response. If only to satisfy your curiosity and really test the limits of FazCo’s ingenious A.I. Hey, you’re a beta tester—it speaks for itself!

Sun grins even wider, if possible. “That’s a good one! As for me…” He makes a thinking gesture, eyes narrowing like he’s contemplating it deeply, then brightens up. No, literally. A lightbulb appears over his head for a quick moment. “I like all the colors, it’s so hard to choose just one! Normally, I just say ‘rainbow’!” He makes a little semicircle gesture with his hands around his head. Little pixelated sparkles wink into and out of existence near his fingers before he clasps his hands behind him once more. You’ve got to hand it to FazCo—they certainly know how to add some flair to their characters. “Next question! If you could have any superpower ever, what would it be?”

You chew at your lip again as you lean back in your chair and ponder his question. Why is it when people ask you these kinds of questions you always blank on the answers? Sun is ever so patient as he waits, moving in that idle animation next to the open window.

Ah well, it’s not like you’re answering an interview question or anything. You wing it. ‘probably invisibility, or something. hbu?’ And enter.

“Ooh! Invisibility!” Sun nods like he’s giving his approval. “Good in the right hands! I would want the power to read minds, I think! All the better for making fantastic friends!”

You make a small sound at that. Well, you suppose that’s one way to make friends, albeit not a very… stable foundation to base a friendship off of. Sun proceeds with his next question. “This one’s a bit of a tough one! What’s your favorite word?”

‘Tough’ is an understatement. You’re stumped. You rake through your mind for a word and draw up nothing but blanks. You’re certain you have one, but you just cannot think of it at the moment. Shrugging, you type ‘idk. i can't think of one rn, sorry. do u have one?’

His head cocks to the side, grin curling at the edges. “That’s more than one word, New Friend!” Sun replies amusedly, then laughs—a loud, tinkering thing that cuts off a bit strangely at its end. “Kidding! I’ll let you off easy for that one!” He is quite good at adapting to your responses, you note lightly. Very intriguing. You wonder how that’s coded. “My favorite word is supercalifragilisticexpialidocious!” You blink in surprise. The dialogue box is barely able to hold the word inside of it. You didn’t quite expect him to say that, of all words, though you guess it makes sense for him. Sun doesn’t elaborate, just transitions merrily through the next part of his script. “Now, for this question, I need you to be as detailed as possible, okay? It is”—he pauses for a second—“essential.”

You nod, but it’s not like he can see you, so you end up looking like a fool. Sun stares straight ahead and it… it feels a bit like he’s looking directly at you. You shift uneasily in your seat and watch his eyes go dark along with his white rays and wide smile. Abyss-like. Something drops in the pit of your stomach at the abrupt switch. His smile widens. It cracks like he’s on the edge of something hysterical. And when he speaks, it’s in a low, garbled voice that grates at your ears.

“Where.” He grits out. “Are—”

He doesn’t get the chance to finish. A glitch encompasses his body that makes his rays twitch erratically and his limbs to jitter about like he’s being electrocuted. You jerk back out of surprise and consider exiting the hell out of the program. But then he’s back to normal like nothing had ever happened. White eyes stare up at you with an equally as white smile.

“Oh!” Sun exclaims cheerfully, swaying about gently. You’re taken aback and, quite frankly, confused out of your goddamn mind. “Silly me, look at the time! I’m afraid our friendship will have to wait! There’s someone else who’d like to meet you!”

“What.” You utter the word mindlessly, eyes flicking down to the time on your computer. 6:59 P.M. Time sure did fly by through all of… that. You’re not entirely sure what to think of it.

“Talk to you soon, New Friend!” Sun waves a hand in farewell, then spins himself around in a little animated tornado. You can only stare, oddly transfixed and still utterly flummoxed, as he spins around, and around, and around until the clock changes to 7:00 P.M. and he slows to an elegant stop.

Only, it’s not Sun you’re looking at anymore.

The rays are gone, replaced with a nightcap covering his head that’s adorned with twinkling stars and a little bell at the end. All the yellows have shifted to greys, blues, and blacks, though he still retains the golden bells, red ribbons, and red sash. His pants are a midnight blue with the same circuitry design, and his shoes now have little moons etched into them instead of suns.

This must be the moon, you conclude once you’re done observing him. The other half to the Daycare Attendant you remember seeing via advertisement—the one who’d been in charge of naptime.

You watch as Moon seems to look around. You’re not sure what he’s looking at, but you can only wait. Gentle ruby eyes move from your desktop icons to the open window that Sun had been standing next to. His smile turns jagged like the outline of a mountain. And then—

And then he slinks away, disappearing straight off of your monitor without a second look. You’re left staring at the open window, the cursor still blinking in the textbox and awaiting your input. What… just happened? You blink at where he’d disappeared off screen and wait a few moments. But he doesn’t come back.

What the hell?

Five minutes turns into ten, which turns into fifteen and then twenty, but he truly does not return. You’re stupefied.

Maybe you should restart the program? You nibble at your lower lip and right click on the FazPals icon so you can end it and then boot it back up again. Your mouse turns into that loading circle of death, and you swear you’re not holding your breath in anticipation or anything, but it sure does feel like it.

Loading… loading… loading…

…

Nothing. Zip, zilch, nada. Moon does not appear. You groan and scratch at your ear again, shifting your headphones. Day one of testing and you’ve already run into a problem. Great. Well, it wasn’t like you’d expected everything to be smooth sailing. Still annoying, though. Just in case, you try restarting your computer.

It doesn’t yield any results either, and you end up just watching some videos as you wait to see if the bug will magically fix itself. Spoiler alert, it doesn’t and you eventually give up as the clock ticks closer to midnight.

But well—you think as you slowly pull up the submission form FazCo had sent you for your job to fill out—you suppose this is why the program’s still in the testing phase. It obviously has some kinks that need to be ironed out. Hopefully it’ll get fixed up in the next patch update. Until then, you’ll just have to deal with it.

A benefit of working from home? You get to set your own schedule. A blessing, at times.

That unfortunately means you have to stick to it while ensuring you’re properly taking care of yourself, and going outside to get fresh air, and also getting all the necessary work done on time, and also—

Well, you get the point.

You wake up groggy the next day and stumble your way out of your room, just barely managing to step over the little Roomba aimlessly bumbling down the small hallway. At one point it was another product you were testing, but then it was given the green flag for mass production and admission to stores. The company let you keep the one they sent you. It was a little finicky, but it worked just fine. You named it Chicken Nugget a while ago—Dr. Nugget for short, because a Roomba with a PhD was just too amusing to pass up. You’re still musing over what area its PhD is in.

There is much to be done. Dishes from last night need to be washed, food needs to be prepared to last you a few days, timesheets need to be filled out before you forget your hours. It’s easy to multitask on household chores while you do your job. You're on the beta testing team for quite a few companies, so you’re kept busy evaluating their programs and products while you julienne onions and clean plates. You earn enough to live comfortably, and it’s all you can ever ask for, really.

Eventually, after a long day of being a responsible human being and submitting numerous evaluation forms for various applications, you plop down in front of your computer with your headphones and turn it on. Evening has just started to creep in, turning the sky into a picturesque gradient of burnt mandarin and dusty magenta. Your desk is right by a window, so it’s nice to draw the curtains back and let fresh air circulate around the room from it.

Alright, computer on. You type in your password to log in and wait as it finishes booting up. First thing on your list—check your email. There’s nothing of importance, not that you’d expected anything, really. Oh hey, you’ve got a discount code for your next purchase at your favorite pizza store. Sweet. You save it for later.

All you have to do is test FazCo’s program and then you can relax for the rest of the night. You preemptively open up their submission form and minimize the window, then double click on the FazPals icon. Hopefully you won’t run into any problems. Code is weird like that—working perfectly fine at one moment and doing fuck all the next. And it’s always a pain filling those surveys out when there’s an abundance of bugs and glitches to point out. It’s simple, but oh so tedious. You guess that’s what you’re getting paid for, though.

Blinking back to attention, you squint at your empty desktop then double click on the FazPals icon again. Ah, there you go. Loading symbol.

Instead of the little music box like you’d been expecting, Sun comes into view by cartwheeling in from the side of your monitor. It’s silly and you smile slightly as he jumps up to his feet and splays his arms and a leg out wide like he’s about to fall into another cartwheel.

“New Friend!” he exclaims loudly alongside the text in his dialogue box, rays spinning rapidly about his head in delight. You wince slightly and lower your volume a bit. No need to kill your eardrums. “You’re back! It has been twenty-two hours, nine minutes, and thirty-seven seconds since we last interacted!”

Your brow raises at his precision, but what else did you expect from a computer program? Sun relaxes into his normal stance and leans forward eagerly. “So! What do you wanna do?” A small, labeled window pops up next to him for you to type in. One of his rays twitches slightly. “For a list of activities I can perform, type ‘/help’!”

You’ve already forgotten what he can do other than walk around and talk your ear off, so you do just that and the window disappears. You didn’t even have to hit enter.

Sun beams. “For your present and future reference, I can tell jokes, give fun facts, play games, and storytell! Pick your poison, New Friend!”

You ponder for a bit, then type ‘can u tell me a fun fact?’ in the new window before it pops out of sight, again before you can press enter. Huh. You make a note of it mentally. The back and forth with the windows is going to take some getting used to.

“I sure can!” Sun does a little wiggle and stands at full attention with his arms crossed behind his back. “Did you know that neutron stars spin six hundred times per second? Pretty cool!” He seems very cheery today. You’ll have to keep an eye out for any more of that strange glitching from yesterday. “Want another one?”

Eh, you don’t see why not. You shrug and click the ‘Yes’ button when it appears. Sun gives a little salute. “The most water ever discovered surrounds a black hole about twelve billion lightyears away! It has the equivalent of one hundred and forty trillion times the volume of Earth’s oceans!” You’re starting to see a theme here with his fun facts and it honestly checks out. Sun’s rays spin a little to the right as he tilts his head slightly. “That was two facts in one, technically. Just for you! Don’t tell anyone!!” And then he winks, accompanied by a little star spinning out from his eye. It’s a small detail, but it still makes you smile. Consider you charmed.

“Alrighty! I have an idea of what we can do next!” Sun says as he skips away to the edge of your monitor. You watch him curiously as he sticks a hand beyond your desktop—somewhere offscreen?—and starts pulling over a large open window from it. Like he’s unraveling a spool of paper. He drags the window over to the center of your screen, then wipes his face with his arm and takes an exaggerated breath. “Phew! That’s heavier than it looks! Luckily, I’ve got these to help me!” He flexes his stick-like arms dramatically, posing this way and that like he’s a pro wrestler.

You notice, as he poses, that another small window pops up—indistinct and unlabeled this time with a simple textbox for you to type in. But he… didn’t really ask you a question or anything of the sorts for you to respond to? You eye it for a moment, then decide to type a little ‘hi’ in it to see if it’s a bug or something. After waiting a few seconds to see if the window will close again without you hitting enter, nothing really happens. Oh, is it fixed now? You hit enter and the text disappears, but the window stays. You guess it is. Code, man. So finicky.

Sun stops flexing to shoot you a bright beam with a spin of his rays. “Hello!”

Okay, maybe it’s not a bug if he can still process your texts. Shrugging it off easily, you turn your attention to the window Sun had pulled over from who-knows-where. It looks like your computer’s Paint app. How did he open that? ‘what’s that for?’ you type into the textbox.

“This is for us to play some games, silly!” Sun brandishes his hands towards the Paint window like he’s presenting a masterpiece. “How does Tic-Tac-Toe sound?”

Well, not like you have any other ideas for what to do. ‘sure, let’s play.’

“Faz-tastic!” Sun claps his hands, then reaches into his pocket and pulls out a comically large wooden pencil from its depths. Seriously, it’s nearly the length of his arm. It’s like something right out of a cartoon and you grin at the silliness. He steps closer to the Paint window and draws four perfectly straight and intersecting lines—each of them the same length and splitting into the same sized boxes and everything. He then draws a perfect circle in one of the corner boxes and steps back. “Your turn!”

You crack your knuckles and roll your shoulders. Okay. Time to lock in and kick this program’s ass.

Except you don’t.

You lose horribly. Seven times in a row, in fact.

‘r u cheating? ur cheating, aren’t u,’ you type into the open textbox, which had remained in place all throughout your games. Unusual, but you’re not too bothered by it. After you lost the first few rounds, you started complaining to him using it. You figured you might as well. It’s almost like having a conversation with him and you’re pretty impressed by his verbal versatility.

“Cheating?!” Sun squawks, offended. He splays a hand across his chest as he somehow manages to twirl his giant pencil in his hand like a baton. “A rulebreaker, I am not! I think someone is getting a little grumpy!” He gives you a pointed grin.

You should have expected you’d lose to fucking A.I. software. You run your tongue over your bottom lip, where you’d been incessantly troubling it with your teeth throughout the rather merciless Tic-Tac-Toe beating you’d just received. You’re considering mentioning in the submission form that the program is too difficult to beat at games, but maybe you’re just that bad at them. Your ego’s definitely going through it.

‘i’m not grumpy,’ you grumble. Sun shakes his little digital head in good mirth, seeing right through you, of course. You switch topics. ‘let’s play something else. got any other games?’

“I sure do, Friend!” He uses his pencil eraser to clear the Paint canvas and starts drawing what looks like a game of Hangman. He gives you a sly smile. “Think you’re up for a real challenge?” Cheeky!

After some rounds of Hangman and Pictionary (which, to your pleasant surprise, you’re not too bad at, but maybe Sun’s taking pity on you), Sun eventually closes the Paint window and makes a show of stretching languidly. “My time’s almost up, I’m afraid!” Sure enough, a quick glance at the time shows it’s nearing seven o’clock. Time flies when you’re having fun. “Make sure to stretch your back and arms out, Friend! Hydration is also important!”

‘yes boss, u got it, boss,’ you reply before stretching out your arms. You have a water bottle on your desk that you take a quick drink out of, the liquid inside of the insulated material still cool and refreshing. You shiver a little and eye your window still letting the night air into the room. You should close that soon. And maybe turn on the lights so you’re not sitting in the dark illuminated only by your bright screen.

Naturally, you do neither. Too much work right now.

Sun wiggles a little, then clasps his arms behind his back. “This was fun! I will talk to you tomorrow, Friend!” His grin widens, curling at the edges. “Don’t keep me waiting too long!”

And before you can really process the tone of that, he pulls out a red curtain from somewhere behind him. Shaking it out slightly, he pulls it up in front of him to block your view of his little figure entirely. You raise an eyebrow as the curtain wiggles and protrudes out like he’s changing into new clothes, before eventually it falls down and reveals Moon. His nightcap is pulled down to partially cover his glowing ruby eyes.

You lean forward in your chair, attention instantly grabbed. Will he work properly this time? You consider him for a moment as he simply stands there—sullen and, dare you say, annoyed. His eyes are narrowed and his mouth is pulled into a scowl. He shifts like he wants to move or leave, but something keeps him rooted into the same spot Sun was just in. His hands are tucked into the pockets of his pants (he has pockets??) and he slouches like a puppet cut from its strings.

He’s not saying anything. Only glares off at a point somewhere on your screen. You bite the inside of your cheek and decide to take one for the (nonexistent) team.

‘hi moon,’ you type into the textbox that’d remained even after Sun left. Pressing enter, you watch curiously as something tense seems to line Moon’s small shoulders and he moves his glare to the open window instead.

His head twitches. “Hi,” he replies slowly in a raspy voice. It’s not what you’d expected, low and murmured like he’s speaking to someone in a dark and quiet corner. His gaze darts to the dialogue box that pops up next to his head and seems to narrow even farther.

Oookay. He doesn’t say anything else. Is he still bugged or is he just programmed to be much quieter than Sun? You’re not sure if that makes sense for this type of program, though. You try to nudge the conversation again, thinking back to the list of commands Sun gave you earlier. ‘can u tell me a joke?’

Moon seems to look at you and it’s just as creepy as it had been when Sun did it. His scowl deepens. “No.”

You’re taken aback. No? Oh. Well. Maybe you should try something else? ‘can u tell me a fun fact?’ At least you know this command works for certain.

“No.”

It’s like pulling teeth over here.

You’re determined, however. This is your entire job. ‘what about a story?’

“No.” Moon bares knife-like teeth at you in aggravation and you’re tempted to do the same thing back. He doesn’t want to do anything! Something is definitely… off. You make a note of it to include in the submission form later. At least he hasn’t left your screen. You’ll take the win where you can.

You’re stumped on what to do. The only thing you can think of is to keep inputting commands until something gives. Maybe things will sort themselves out? You try asking for a fun fact or joke again, but Moon still just scowls and answers in that same clipped manner. His fidgeting seems to increase.

You’re getting close to calling it quits. ‘why don’t we play a game or something? tic-tac-toe?’

“P-Persistent little thing,” Moon growls into your headset and it’s such a reprieve from the constant rejections that you’re not even offended. You perk up slightly only to deflate at his following words. “Didn’t anyone teach you that ‘no’ means no?”

‘no,’ you type as a response—partly in annoyance and partly just to be snarky. Moon twitches again, and then in the blink of an eye—he glitches.

Similar to Sun, it spreads down his body in a wave and makes him jitter until he snaps back into place like a rubber band. He flexes his hands and takes a step to the side—tentative and exploratory. The window with the textbox pops out of existence and Moon gives you one final, narrowed glare before he just… leaves offscreen. Again. What the fuck?

You scrub a hand down your face and groan. You don’t expect him to return, but just in case you wait around a little and kill some time by filling out the submission form. Name, program version, strengths, encountered issues, and so on. You submit the form when you finish and roll your shoulders. Yeah, he doesn’t come back. At least there was some progress compared to yesterday.

You end the day with a final squint at the FazPals icon and a shrug of your shoulders. Things could be worse, you suppose as you power off your computer and stare at your reflection through the dark screen of your monitor. Hopefully tomorrow brings more improvement.

part two

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hajihiko · 9 months

Note

I’m not any of the anons from before but as a fellow kazuichi fan I’d personally love to hear you talk about why you like him if you feel like it! personally I was first drawn to his character design, I just thought he looked cool, and then the second he opened his mouth and revealed himself as a loser, I loved him like ten times more lol. I know some people think he’s ‘creepy’ but I feel like he keeps enough a distance from Sonia that he’s just a guy with a crush, and also his “don’t you ever just wanna take girls apart and see how their bones work” line lives in my head rent free

Ok well. Sorry dude (genuinely) but I dont think I think of him the way a lotta ppl do. Heres my take sorry if it ruins it

First of all, do I LIKE his character? No. I like what could become of it if handled well, in the future (same with Akane and Sonia and... a lotta characters tbh).

I dont want to gloss over that he was really not cool with Sonia. I DON'T think it was like, a simple silly crush like any other dude would have, I think he WAS inappropriate about it and (most likely completely unbeknownst to him) enforcing things that she genuinely could not stand. He was insecure and took it out on others as well as himself.

These are all character flaws. Every single character has them (some more than others). Fuyuhiko was genuinely a dick (as I have said many times, having anger issues isnt an excuse for the way he talks sometimes), Hiyoko is a bully, Ibuki is insensitive when se gets caught up, Impostor is condescending sometimes, etc. Kazuichi isnt the only one to be a jackass sometimes and t deny it is to deny his character, just as much as reducing him to only that is oversimplifying it.

What I like about Kazuichi is: the design.

(Ok jk but I do enjoy the design a lot)

I like the teenage insecurity. He thinks he wants to be a chick magnet, but gets scared when girls show an interest in him. His ideal woman is basically a barbie doll. He's a little too eager to see his boy bestie naked. He was so excited for a class retreat because he's never had one before. He was so desperate to be cool and tough and not a nerd that he drastically (and no doubt painfully, ow, TEETH) changed his appearance to conform to his Ideal Self, but could not actually change his personality.

He's basically a teenage boy, warts and acne at all, trying so hard to be The That Guy but spectacularly failing. He's actually somewhat of a genius (and the Death Trap stuff hints to him having a lot of repressed turmoil which honestly so true, teenagers whose only outlet is fantasizing about the gory demise of their tormentors, SO TRUE) but he can't SEE that because he wants to be some kind of cool punk frat bro dude. He's so busy living up to some idealized version of himself that he fumbles who he actually is, which if he just took a moment, would be a pretty cool dude. Basically, did you ever discover a cool band and tried to model your entire personality after what you thought those vibes would be? That, but sad.

So yeah, I think he's great at comedic beats, and also has a lot of heart underneath it, but has never been in a place where he can just accept that and let it shine. His last words were basically "here I am, don't forget me!" which like, man, isnt that just relatable teenagerism?

#I dont like how many ppl excuse his behaviour towards Sonia like. It wasnt malicious but it was really insensitive. As a reader who doent-#-know his inner mechanisms it was uncomfortable (you can hc him whatever u want but I'm speaking from just memory no hc).#He made a lot of awkward fumbles and missteps as did a lot of the characters. But to me hes just such a teenage dude #With all the insecurities and sexuality crisis and trying to impress in an environment where he has a chance to (as opposed to.. home.)#not an art #Sorry anon I disagree with you. But u did prompt me to actually talk about this so thanks!

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ganondoodle · 10 months

Text

i know i said i wouldnt be ranting about totk anymore, but i realized i didnt really count the sage dungeons as story (dont ask me why) so i thought im gonna write a better summarized version of my opinion about totk (i have around 60% of the game, all lightroots, not yet all shrines (missing like .. 20 or so, know the reward), not all krogs (dont know the reward), not all mayoi (half know the reward?) )

(in no particular order)

good stuff (in my opinion)

the. MUSIC! god the music is good, it was good in botw too but now with much more different bosses it really is probably one of my fav soundtracks of all time (most fav are all three phases of the end fight, the pre-fight to that, the build up one before all of those, Frosgeira (wind tempel boss) the glorious mASTER KOGA and more tbh)

the build up and end boss fight(s) are fantastic, i dont think im ever not gonna have my heart racing when approaching it (despite now skipping almost the entire way bc i set a teleport thing right before it) just bc the build up is so well made and the music(again) is such a banger and the fight(s) itself is so fun too, tbh i keep wanting to play it just bc its so fun

i LOVE how many themes play into the music (endfight alone had so many layers, fav probably is ganondorfs classic theme and calamity ganons both in the same piece among much more, and daruks theme in the fire temple)

(edit) YOU. CAN. TOUCH. DA. DRAGONS!!!!

ganondorf

ganondorfs design (x3)

ganondorfs weapon designs

ganondorfs voice (japanese)

everyone elses voice (japanese)

all voices (german)

thE YIGA!!! i love everythign about them and am so happy they got to be more than just some mini mission

(edit) also the fact that they get zonau tech to work without any special ghost powers is so ????

(edit) koga can summon and use zonau tech unlimited?? hes so cool

NO stealth mission!! (as far as im aware)

bosses are very different from each other

main dungeons are not too short and not too long and mostly fun (mostly bc i personally didnt like the gerudo one), i love that you can still somewhat cheese them and do them your way

sages felt like they got a bit more involved

(edit) you gotta do more stuff before getting to the actual dungeons and i really like that, feels less like a fetch quest but that you are actually helping

(edit) each sage is actually there in the dungeon and is required for it, which is great!

each settlement saw a much bigger danger/change (tho that has more impact if you have played botw) and its problems felt much more real

shrines are well varied tho i think overall a little easy (only got stuck on two so far and later solved them easily bc when i first started them i was tired and exhausted, no brain left lol)

NPCs felt less flat + more bigger sidequests that felt like they had more impact

cool new monsters + designs

the underground was pretty appropiately creepy

the sages abilities are neat

you can refight bosses!!

stable points system is a neat way to encourage you using them

weapon fusing is neat

(edit) the forest of the krogs being corrupted like that is both creepy and a neat nod to oot

(edit) the vai gerudo outfit being gone!! (one) evil has been defeated

(edit) the health bar going so far off the middle in ganondorfs second phase is honestly just funny hnjdfdjk unfortunate that you only need the master sword and with a few perfect dodges his health melts like butter in the summer

(edit) the music when dragondorf transforms sounds so sad .. its probably meant as a oh no world is actually ending sad but i like to think of it as a oh god what did he do to himself sad

the scene where rauru seals ganondorf kinda fruity

(graphic, animations and the overall world is still fantastic)

bad stuff (in my opinion)

everything zonau they feel forced into every bit of the world and its history (i know them being somewhat alien is intentional but not like that) it feels crammed into places they werent before and shouldnt be and it makes it all feel very artificial

the glyphs/dragon tears/memories really ruined alot for me, while it gave you insight as to what happened, it felt like it showed you too much and too little at the same time and i think it would have worked better if it was all in text for once if even at all, so the past stil stayed a mystery and youd be left wondering

timetravel .. really wasnt necessary and felt more like an excuse to get rid of zelda + make her the poor little sacrificial girl again + and to make her turning into a dragon as tragic as possible, like nothing but a stepping stone to the big reveal tm

shiekah tech being not just fully irrelevant but practically erased, wiped off the world (i know about the literally last guardian parts in hateno, it feels more like an oversight tbh, purah technically using it ... tho i dont think she ever calls it that, the purah pad is jsut the sheikah stone but worse), there being no good explanation, no remains, nothing as to why it would suddendly stop working and why even the titans and ESPEICALLY the shrine of life would be destroyed, if anything why wouldnt you enshrine it as a memento to history it was such a focus in botw and so well integrated into the world that it being fully gone, not even old overgrown, or visibly reused to build homes etc., or remains of how they built the og shrines in the underground feels like a HUGE missed opportunity (seriously it would have been so easy to make the ancient shiekah base their tech on old zonau tech, without stealign the gocus but buildign a connection)

all of the continuity problems, totk feels like botw didnt happen and the excuse of 'they didnt want to confuse new players' doesnt make a lick of sense in my eyes bc; its supposed to be a sequel, if you want it to be a standalone game then dont call it a sequel- if you start to play a game with the sequel instead of the first part its your own damn fault if you get confused; if anything, it would have been a good opportuntiy to make people interested in botw so theyd buy and play that one too

ganondorfs character is very flat, you basically get to know nothing about him (yuno even calls that out midgame but its never elaborated upon nhgfrdfhkk)

the zonau and their kingdom of hyrule is presented as this so perfectly good thing to such a degree it turns creepy, the end cutscene with mineru going poof was kinda uncomfy to watch tbh

the reward for all shrines being essentially a reveal as to who the hero in the tapestry was and it being, of course, some weird half zonau is the lamest answer to a mystery i didnt want an anwser too, it doesnt feel like it came naturally either (again my point of the zonau being forced into everything)

the shrines (zonau) feel so much more unnatural than the shiekah shrines, alien in a bad way and not in a good way + really are like a bad reskin of them, their sudden appearance and use is so much less logical

back in botw i was doubtful of if the shiekah tech wasnt going to far too modern tech and cause it all to feel like a bad mix of modern tech and medival fantasy, but they balanced it perfectly (tho the eponator zero was very much the limit imo) but the zonau tech .... oversteps that line i think, it really does feel, more than anything else, that it was just bc they wanted the stuff to be in there bc it might be fun to play around with, im not against that kind of stuff mind you im all for fun, but it feels a little like they thought of a box with endless stuff to play with first and a zelda game second (if you get what i mean)

quite a few quests or things in the game seem like they are more and then end in a dead end (the worst of all is impa saying she wants to go research what could help zelda turn back, and i was excited and convinced that shed give me a quest to find some mcguffin that would do that after i beat ganon but there wasnt anything you could actually do; less bad one but disappointing nonetheless the dongos were mentioned and treated like this big awesome thing from alot of NPCs all around the map and then when you find them they are bascially just gem vending maschines)

the way zelda turns back and link gets his arm back is incredibly unsatisfying, none of them even have something like a scar, or mark from it all, zelda spent thousands of years as a dragon (a transformation that was said to cost your soul but i guess that wasnt true) and link had his arm bascially eaten by miasma and he gets it back like it was never lost, zelda returns all intact as if nothing happened, getting blasted by some magic tm by two ghosts that were supposed to be long gone is the solution to all problems!!

(edit) link losing an arm wouldnt just be super intersting but also lend itself well to lead up into the next game where his prothesis is the focus and source of abilities

(edit) zelda got done so dirty, instead of her actual interests and character to shine she just gets shoved into yet another crisis surrounded by strangers in a world that looks like hers but isnt, and all she does is beg the ancient sages to swear to help link and sacrifice herself again (can you call that fridging? bc she sure feels like she got fridged) i like zelda and i dont like how much i didnt care about her and tbh im angry at the game for that

(edit) both link and zelda not even slightly changing in the years btween botw and totk kinda boring, like a haircut can only do so much

(edit) sonia really is the wife that dies to make husband sad thing isnt she? i get that gan had to get his hands on an enigma stone but i feel like there had been better ways to do that, the fact that she dies that easily is almost funny honestly, why does ganondorf even have weapons when he can just one punch people to death (tho i find it funny to imagine he can literally just kill people in one punch but hes too prideful to do it most of the time so he always uses weapons to look more cool)

(edit) so many new characters that you barely get to see or interact with, i really ... couldnt get myself to care much

(edit) zonau tech being so irrelevant to the games story while its also the focus is .. weird, its really just play doh for the players and nothing else honestly

(edit) monsters mining sonanium feels strange bc ... they dont do anything with it? the best thing i can think of is that they were told to do that so link cant .. upgrade his battery thignies? but then again you could just destroy the mines and remaining constructs to stop it .... also you really dont need anything zonau tech related to beat gan?

(edit) ganondorf beign so utterly uninterested in their tech is weird considering how he dealt with shiekah tech (and we KNOW it can get corrupted) he should be a tech nerd tbh

my twitch VoD of the first time beating the game getting muted at the credits despite me talking over it

nitpicks (in my opninion)

(edit) ganondorf should have a bit more of a boar inspired design, as treat, i think

(edit) the enigma stone wandering back to ganondorfs forehead even after transforming is? weird? i guess an excuse for da epic last stabby but still? (how cool would it have been to have to plunge into his mouth and break it there or something)

(edit) the underground gets a lil old after a while, the fact that its pretty much the same everywhere aside from some .. very strange flowing magma is a lil boring

(edit) ganondorf could have gone way more crazy with abilities and all that, imagine hed spwan multiple miasma arms on himself when you get him to a certain level of health

(edit) i miss unique weapons, there arent even normal axes around anymore, everything is about fusing really, i miss the cool shiekah tech weapons

(edit) the forest of the krogs being largely irrelevant is kinda weird

(edit) mineru being the sage of spirit still is kinda meh, the robot is neat but i thought tauro or purah would be the surprise sage tbh

(edit) the bosses were a little easy (i did boldo gohma rather early and did it without even getting hit)

you cant talk to koga normally :(

you cant find koga again after the last fight :(

you cant refight him (to my knowledge) :(

i find it very strange that yuno seemingly lost daruk shield, despite him having inhereted it in botw

the sage powers are not .. very great integrated, while its fun to haven them run around and help you fight, to actually use their powers you have to chase after them, something that in the heat of a battle is very annoying to do, constantly activating the wrong on or them losing their charge up when they get knocked over is like trying to herd a wild pack of geese while a three headed dragon is shotting laserbeams at you

some widlife just disappearing all of the sudden is very strange (like the rhino in hebra)

some new houses or settlements would have been cool, that the material things at the sides of roads are really only for you to play around with and not to build anything that lasts

you cant fight ganondorf (non dragon, even the dragon is locked to that evening sky) in the sunlight, night or rain, i would have loved to fight him at various times of day

their refusal to show any kind of blood is honestly turnign serious scenes into very awkward ones, sonia just getting punched and she dies with not even like, losing some spit from the force or something, or the fact when you defeat ganondorfs second phase he acts mortally wounded but doesnt even look scratched is just :/

amiibo stuff while neat being included its really mostly just bloating your inventory, if i wanted 5 vaguely different link outfits then i would have gotten the amiibo for it

why hide the -now-totally-not-phantom-ganon-armor- behind such a long questline and then .. have that NOT be upgradable

they put in a house building thingy and then not let you have a roof or a tree or something :(

at some point stable points jsut get you more and more of those free staying over night tickets that i maybe used .. once at the very start and now its just accumulating in my inventory

only one new horse coat pattern :(

satori now only being a thingy that shows you caves is kinda boring, i loved the mystery around it in botw (additionally, that it shows you caves you have completed already kinda sucks)

the end of the shrines isnt that cool anymore, speaking to a mummified monk that gives you essentially his last remains of life energy is so much cooler than a statue of the oh so awesome god king and his wife

the many references and reuse of old names is neat but together with timetravel etc. it easily leads to confusing and fighting among fans for who is more 'right' and its just .. tiring

(edit) considering how much of the advertising was about the sky islands i wished there were more and bigger ones, the underground (that was a little one sided after a while, it all looking the same rly) could have been alot smaller if the sky was bigger instead

(edit) i wished there was more of a sense of .. lost life in the ruins you find, from all races, the ancient ruins are jsut some bridged and ceremonial stuff and i wished there were more like .. houses, like people actually lived there and it not being all around beign a platform for you

(edit) the fact that the half zonau hero exists mean either rauru and sonia had kids but those were clearly not important enough to ever show nor mention, or there were other mixing of them before they all mysteriously died out the fact that the ancient hero was half zonau means their genes survided till then but somehow it never came up? the tapestry still exists and impa and purah say like its a well known fact that the hero looked like that (not at all close to any modern species) when you talk to them while wearing it (the fact that the hero armor thingy is very reminiscemt of ganondorf is like some backtreading bc we were theorizing about the hero having been ganondorf once and they wanted to stop that .. but the more funny thing is the HC of its a descdendet of rauru and ganondorf nhjdfknhdgkfnhkfd) (edit to add to the HC; the game being a big battle about child support is funnier than it should be idk if nintendo knew what they were doing adding details like that)

all in all it just feels like missed opportunities, lost potential, and more a game build around some game mechanics they really wanted to get into than telling a neat story, espeically so bc they called it a sequel, most of my complaints wouldnt be there if it was some alternate thing instead

i probably forgot stuff but if i think of more i will add them later with a little note that it was added in an edit (sidenote, i find it funny how much more nuance that whole conflict would get if rauru and ganondorf were bitter exes bfdrjfbdfndk)

#ganondoodles talks #zelda #totk #totk spoilers #i felt like i was beign a little unfair #so i wanted to make a summary #tha took me hours to write #and is again long as shit #whoop #long post #this isnt a complete list iether bc that would be even longer and take even longer nhdjkkd #i wanted to do comic works damn it #anyway this is the last long post about this #bc im moving on now #...its half inspired by people respondign to me with -what how can you not like totks story but then like botws lol wtf-#well i do #*shrugs*

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vidavalor · 5 months

Note

hi again! rewatched the 1st season now. so first off thanks again for the excuse i appreciate it lol. but secondly hoping you wouldn't mind explaining the satan's obssession with crowley thing? cos he's obvs creepy as all hell pun not intended in the 11 years ago scene but i haven't found the bit that confirms it's a fixation on crowley and not just satan being satan. tysm!

Hi! Thanks for the ask. I can try and we can see what you think after, yeah? :) Christmas cookie? *passes plate and pours some tea*

TWs: discussion of PTSD, sexual assault, including rape, intimate partner abuse, anxiety, depression. We're looking at Crowley as an assault survivor here so it's a bit dark. Lindsay's abuse of Nina is also mentioned here. This will wind up having a companion meta at some point soon as I was also asked in comments on another post to talk about Crowley and intimacy issues which is then really also talking about Aziraphale as a trauma-informed partner so a less intense Part 2 at some point soon...

If you're the anon who asked me this (or anybody else) and you can't read something with these warnings but you'd like to see what I'm saying, PM me or throw something in my Asks and I'll see if I can do a version of this that gets the points across while omitting the darker aspects.

Meta on Lucifer and Crowley under the cut.

The Ask here was about why I see Lucifer as fixating on Crowley, in particular, and not just being generally evil as, ya know, he's Satan. It's a fair question since Satan's evil isn't exactly something that anyone would consider restrained as he's the devil. Some of this is inference here when it comes to Lucifer, since the show intentionally holds the character back a bit... but I also think that holding Lucifer back is by design to help illustrate some things that we'll look at here.

The first clue to me that Lucifer has a bit of a fixation on Crowley comes from Crowley's gigs in Hell. Before the end of S1, Crowley was high-ranked in Hell. He seems to go by quite a few names in his demonic world. By making himself Nanny Astoreth when he's looking after Warlock, it alludes the idea that Crowley is also the demon of that name, who is considered part of the "evil trinity" of Hell, along with Lucifer and Beezlebub, with whom Crowley used to spend time with pre-Fall and with whom he has history.

Astoreth is a genderbent serpent goddess in lore with an abundance of other Crowley traits so safe to say that Crowley is meant to be Astoreth as well. Aziraphale proposed in 33 AD that Crowley is also Mephistopheles and Asmodeus, which Crowley didn't exactly deny. Mephistopheles is one of the most famous demons to ever exist-- he of the Faustian bargain-- and Asmodeus is the demonic prince of lust. Crowley's already been shown to be a Bible figure in disguise-- Bildad the Shuite being a Biblical character-- so the idea that we are at the 2/3rds mark of the show and we've met all the high-ranking demons in Hell but several famous ones appear to not exist in Good Omens, despite more minor ones (Shax, Furfur) making appearances, implies that we probably actually have met demons like Mephistopheles and Asmodeus because they're all really Crowley.

Crowley retained power in Hell because it allows him what little freedom he can have in damnation. It means he likely won't be removed from Earth if he proves he's "good" at being a demon and that means he won't get stuffed in some cluttered, dark, cubicle in Hell for millennia. (Or destroyed.) More importantly, it means he'll be able to be on Earth with Aziraphale. That's easily worth taking credit for a bunch of human wars to fool Hell into thinking he's evil.

While we see that Crowley, when forced to come up with a demonic plot of his own, picks more annoying things than evil things and sells them as evil-- the M-25 design, taking down mobile phone networks, he's sometimes forced into doing things he doesn't want to do in order to not be outed as a demon who isn't super jazzed about being a demon and is really, secretly, a free-flying crow. He doesn't live to serve their Master Satan like some of the other demons do. He's going along with Hell as best he can and sometimes, he finds himself in a situation where he has to get creative because he's been tasked with something he disagrees with-- like we saw in the Job minisode. Other times, he might be forced into something he can't find a way out of, which is implied a little to be at the root of his terrible mood when he and Aziraphale meet up in Ancient Rome. He's wearing military garb that implies the temptations he's saying he's in Rome to accomplish are tied to Caligula, who wasn't exactly a swell guy.

What's interesting, though, is that Crowley is in this position of power in the first place. Other demons are shown in both seasons so far to be jealous of Crowley. He gets all the good gigs. Satan makes a bet with God that has both Upstairs and Downstairs in a tizzy for weeks and who is sent to whack the kids? Crowley. Who was sent on the first ever really Earth mission-- to get up into the Garden of Eden and "make some trouble"? Crowley, long before he'd cemented his big reputation. Who gets to deliver the antichrist baby and so kick off Armageddon, the thing that angels and demons basically "live" for? Crowley...

Across both seasons so far, Hastur, Ligur and Furfur are all given scenes of showing that they're jealous of Crowley being a favorite of Satan's and given the best assignments while they slum it in middle-management at best. What Crowley never says or admits to with other demons is that they actually don't want to be the favorite of Lucifer over here because he's the actual fucking devil and it's an absolute horror show. Crowley isn't about to admit that to them because he's supposed to want nothing more than to be Satan's slave and to express anything else is not demonic.

The other demons who are antagonistic towards Crowley are invasive and creepy but they stop short long before what we've seen Lucifer do. Hastur and Ligur pop up unannounced in Crowley's electronics-- the tv in his flat, on the screen at the movies-- and that's already disturbing. Imagine having your evil coworkers able to interrupt your r&r tv time in your own apartment... let alone the fact that Shax and even Beezlebub both pop up into The Bentley unannounced in S2. There's no evidence so far that Satan is out here "delivering instructions" like this to others in Hell the way he does to Crowley in 1.01 (and there's actually a scene in S2 that we'll talk about that suggests that he's not or, at least, that it's uncommon, which we'll get to in a second.)

He might well be but when you combine assaulting Crowley with giving him all the prime gigs in Hell and the other demons' jealousy of their Master's attention towards Crowley, you wind up with the impression that Satan is a bit fixated on Crowley.

The Bentley scene with Lucifer in 1.01 is analogous to rape. Crowley's sense of personal autonomy is violated. He doesn't consent to Lucifer forcibly entering his body. Lucifer does so by first penetrating through Crowley's two foremost metaphorical defenses-- The Bentley (enters through the radio and uses it to invade Crowley) and his sunglasses, which cannot shield his eyes/himself from Lucifer. Crowley already has these signature defenses mechanisms on in the attack scene and the horror in the scene is actually watching neither of them protect him. The scene is so early in the show that it's only the second scene we've ever seen Crowley wearing his glasses (and it's pitch black dark out, to add to it) so the glasses are basically introduced to us by showing us a situation that motivates Crowley's desire to hide his eyes from people he doesn't trust, even if they aren't human and know what his eyes look like. This is Crowley's third scene in the series itself and it's really arguably the second half of his second scene (the Hastur & Ligur in the graveyard one.) It's part of our introduction to Crowley in the modern era, with only Eden preceding it. Armageddon is new but the rest of this hell-- faking being evil, suffering violating attacks-- is thousands of years old for him at this point.

Crowley is driving when this happens.

Driving is the ultimate symbol of self-control because you're literally behind the wheel, navigating yourself through the world, in control of where you are going and the decisions you need to make to get you there, trusting yourself to make decisions that protect others on the road around you. Lucifer rips that from him by rendering him unable to drive while "delivering instructions" to his mind. Crowley-- a very powerful, magical being-- is unable to fight him off. When Lucifer leaves his body, Crowley had to grab the wheel and steer The Bentley away from hitting an oncoming truck with about three seconds to spare from a head-on collision. Crowley, The Bentley and the antichrist baby all would have likely survived that crash without issue because of their magic-- but the human driving the truck likely would not have. Obviously, Crowley would prefer not to kill anybody but Satan nearly made him against his will and rendered him unable to fight him, the powerlessness of which is then interesting when tied into things like Crowley essentially drugging himself to save Elspeth, trusting the present Aziraphale to help protect him while he did, etc..

As the attack happens, parts of "Bohemian Rhapsody" are underscoring it, picking up on a musical cue from when Crowley rolled up in The Bentley to see Hastur and Ligur in the graveyard. The graveyard scene sees Crowley arrive at the big crescendo of the song and what is it but the lyrics Beezlebub, has the devil put aside for me? and, prior to that, the eerie lyrics, especially on rewatch when you know what happens as a result of this scene: we will not let you go (let him go) x a million, not to mention the no no no no no no... bit.

By the time we're back in The Bentley and Lucifer has shown up, parts of the song play through it. I see a little silhouetto of a man plays as Crowley is literally seeing the driver of the oncoming truck in front of him, just as he loses the ability to control The Bentley. When Lucifer leaves him and Crowley grabs the wheel, we hear thunderbolts and lightning/very, very frightening/me and the Galileo segment of the song. Thunderbolts and lightning is interesting since God makes it a point to point out that this night is not dark and stormy but then that type of weather is what Crowley does in S2 that causes the power to go out and his parallel, Nina, to be trapped. It's also what demons in general can do so you could say sending a storm-- like in the Job minisode-- to be demonic and of Satan. (If it's not Crowley doing it to play Cupid, anyway.) The thunderbolts and lightning of Satan/Hell is very, very frightening to Crowley...

...Me/Galileo/Galileo/Galileo/Figaro... Galileo is arguably the most famous astronomer to ever live. He was a polymath, really, like Crowley was. Crowley, as an angel, made the stars and invented gravity. The scene with Hastur and Ligur that precedes this and ties into it has Hastur mistranslate the Italian Crowley spoke during it. Crowley said "ciao", meaning "goodbye", which Hastur correctly said was Italian but he claimed it meant "food" (mistaking it for "chow" because he's an idiot.) So a scene that ends with Crowley speaking Italian then connects directly into the scene of this attack, where Italian is spoken in the song scoring it, as Galileo was Italian and figaro in Italian is "fig tree".

While Eve does eat an apple in Good Omens, the Biblical 'fruits of knowledge' that tie to the Serpent tempting Eve in Eden are interpreted in different ways throughout different religions and at different periods in history. In Good Omens, Crowley got Eve to eat an apple and the pleasure of food opened a door to sexual pleasure. Eve shared the apple with Adam and they were *Aziraphale's hilariously judgemental voice* "expecting already" with Eve about 8 months pregnant later a day later because Eve's biology is atypical of other humans and all that. It's debated as an apple, with other different fruits and sometimes even wheat mentioned as possible things Eve ate-- if she ate food at all, as some people take the entire thing as a sexual metaphor. Figs are one fruit that some people believe it was instead of an apple, so this is a reference to Crowley as the Serpent of Eden.

Me/Galileo/Galileo/Galileo/Figaro... Crowley holding onto himself while under attack and just after it, which speaks to activation of a plan, which speaks to this not being the first time he's endured something like this. Galileo and Figaro = The Starmaker and the Serpent of Eden. The things he's done that he is proud of, that make him not evil, in his mind, and not deserving of this. Things he likes about himself. Things Aziraphale loves about him.

The song is narrating for us Crowley through the attack as he's basically frozen there enduring it, seeing the driver of the truck coming at him and Scaramouche/Scaramouche/Will you do The Fandango?

A scaramouche is a kind of mischievous scamp-- so, Crowley; The Fandango is a Spanish couple dance. Historically, one version of it is done between a pair of men who try to outdo one another with skill, in a kind of homoerotic competition. It's also slang for fucking during a concert and I have the feeling that Crowley would probably enjoying doing that Fandango a lot more as that would be consenting with a partner of his choice at a live concert rather than being mind-raped to Queen by the devil in his car. Regardless, it's another allusion to sex in the scene, adding to the rape overtones.

There's also something that is pretty horrifying about the fact that these scenes of Crowley and Aziraphale being separately reintroduced to us in 2008 after we first met them both together in Eden are intercut so that Lucifer's attack on Crowley scored by "Bohemian Rhapsody" ends with the Italian sung and cuts directly into Aziraphale speaking Japanese to the chef at the sushi restaurant.

He'll try to explain to Gabriel that eating sushi is "what humans do", which is the same phrase he'll use to try to explain to Michael and Uriel in S2 what falling in love is. During the bookshop attack, Shax will bully Aziraphale about his humanity-- about the same two things (food and love) in the two previous, connected scenes. (Gabriel, initially the one repulsed by tea in 1.01, leaves the scene after Aziraphale tells him to hide by asking if anyone wants a hot chocolate, in a pretty hilarious turnabout.) Shax calls back to the food-related and the love-related "it's what humans do" moments for Aziraphale by asking if she should "send up the sushi" and by mocking his relationship with Crowley ("What are you? Crowley's emotional support angel?"). Crowley and Aziraphale are the ones in love and it's tied together throughout multiple scenes in both seasons to sushi, in reference to the night Armageddon began in 2008.

The point then is that, making this all even worse, Crowley is actually supposed to be at a back corner table in a dark sushi restaurant sneaking a date with Aziraphale when he's attacked by Lucifer in The Bentley-- and then forced into helping start Armageddon, which could bring about the end of his and Aziraphale's relationship... and that's our grim introduction to his world in the modern part of the story.

As we go learn what Aziraphale is like in the modern era and contrast him with his head office's mentality via Gabriel's arrival, we also are given clues in the scene that suggest that Aziraphale was actually expecting Crowley, as he looks to the side Crowley comes up on when he hears the miracle sound that actually signals Gabriel's arrival instead. Aziraphale will then explain that he's there, doing "what humans do" and enjoying it, to Gabriel, and it will be only eating sushi in this moment, just as Crowley will not be present when Aziraphale explains that falling in love is "what humans do" while objectively talking about Maggie & Nina but, ultimately, talking about himself and Crowley beneath it-- his real motivation for keeping Heaven off their backs is Crowley. The writers then have Shax combine the two "it's what humans do" scenes around love and sushi and throw them back at Aziraphale while Crowley is once again not with him because of Heaven/Hell but is present in his absence in the moment.

All of this happens in the first scenes of Crowley in the modern era, all the way back in the first episode, and it's done to give us an understanding that he is a survivor of attacks like this and how that impacts his behavior, his choices, his relationship with Aziraphale. It's to give us a finer appreciation for his strength and his humor and his capacity to love in the face of it. It's to show that while some of the demons are just kind of amusing idiots, if dangerous, and that there's a lot of humor to mine there, some aspects of being a demon are not at all amusing. Crowley is really just doing the best he can to survive the absolute horror show that is an eternity of damnation as Satan's favorite over here because there are very dark, very violent aspects of it that he cannot permanently avoid.

While the attack we are shown is a mercifully short, if horrifying, scene, the implications of it are even worse. The assault we are shown had a plot purpose in that moment-- Satan giving instructions on delivering the antichrist baby to the satanic nunnery-- and since everything was in motion, that was the extent of it. Armageddon took precedence. What we are left with, though, is the impression that this type of demonic assault with its massive rape overtones is something that Crowley's experienced before and that the implication is that Lucifer attacking him is not always just to deliver a message related to an assignment but to deliver one of forcible control over him and that this is something that Crowley has been dealing with periodically for the 6,000 years he's been on Earth. It's akin to a kind of rape in 1.01 and that is already way more than enough to see how that would affect Crowley in the story... but then S2 takes this scene and both alludes to it in a key moment and gives it a whole paralleling subplot, highlighting its importance and continuing to expand upon the meaning of it. Both things together then suggest that while we saw a rape-coded assault in 1.01, the feeling that the scene was alluding to other instances where it was rape itself was definitely the implication of it.

In S2, in the group scene at the end, Crowley is out of the bookshop taking Maggie and Nina away from the angels for their safety when the subject of Satan comes up for the only direct time that season. Shax demands that Gabriel and Beezlebub be taken to Hell to be given "as gifts for Satan, our Master" and Head of the Dark Council Dagon replies that "he wouldn't want them-- maybe as hors d'ouerves." On the show obsessed with food symbolism and that codes different types of food with relation to sex-- in particular, because of Serpent of Eden Crowley-- and with the brothel owner named "Mrs. Sandwich", to say someone would want a being as a "hors d'ouerves" implies sex and if we're talking about Lucifer, then we've already established that consent isn't exactly a priority. Rape isn't about sex-- it's about power-- but the show is coding Lucifer's behavior in line with its coding of sex to highlight that his violation of Crowley isn't just of the heavily rape-coded variety that we saw in 1.01 but has actually, at other times, been rape.

Dagon's most significant line in S2 is essentially to point out that Satan's a rapist-- but it's also to point out that not everyone in Hell has been through that horror. Satan's choosy. Satan's a bit fixated. Dagon's comment is actually surprising. Your first thought when Shax suggests giving Gabriel and Beez to Lucifer is that he's the devil so they'd be in danger and what you've seen of what he's done to Crowley was skin-crawling and you don't want that to happen to Gabriel and Beezlebub. You assume that it might because we're talking about Satan but then Dagon puts a check on that and says-- to not a single bit of even implied disagreement in the room-- that Satan wouldn't really care that much about getting Gabriel and Beez.

Think about how truly kind of crazy that is.

Satan would not be that interested in being handed over his old friend and the Grand Duke of Hell who betrayed him and the Supreme Archangel of Heaven? He'd maybe rape 'em, sure, possibly, casually posits Dagon, but they aren't what he's really after. They'd just be hors d'ouerves.

Not a single being in the room even so much as signals disagreement with that assessment that the not terribly subtle Dagon chose to voice aloud, which means they all agree with her. They all know who Lucifer's fixated on.

*Gabriel* and *Beezlebub* would only be fucking *appetizers* to Satan.

That implies the existence of *a main course*, does it not?

Who else but Crowley (and Aziraphale) could be on that menu? No one.

We also have that Crowley is conveniently out of the bookshop for the moment that Shax and Dagon have this exchange about Lucifer. He comes back in on Dagon saying "hors d'ouerves" but was outside when Shax was referencing Satan so he didn't hear any of it. This seems very deliberate on the part of the writers, as if Crowley had been in the room, it would have prompted some kind of response and changed what happened in the scene afterwards. Instead, the only reference to Lucifer is specifically when Crowley isn't in the room, probably because this conflict is on-going and going to continue into S3.

Prior to Dagon's line, the show also paralleled Lucifer assaulting Crowley in The Bentley in 1.01 with Lindsay abusing Nina, which adds another layer into this. You could even make an argument that one of the reasons why we never see Lindsay and we just see their abuse of Nina via the text messages they send Nina is to draw an intentional parallel to how little we've seen to date of Lucifer/Satan in the series.

It directly ties to the 1.01 scene in The Bentley because, prior to Lucifer coming through the radio and assaulting Crowley, Crowley was trying to call Aziraphale (the Maggie to his Nina in this parallel, though obviously much further along in that relationship) to tell him about Armageddon but he'd taken out the mobile phone networks earlier in the night to have something demonic to share with Hastur and Ligur. This parallels Crowley knocking out the power in S2 accidentally and Nina getting locked in the coffee shop with Maggie. Lucifer and Lindsay both attack through electronic communication devices-- The Bentley's radio and Nina's phone-- and unleash a torrent of abuse. The difference is that Nina might be more easily able to escape Lindsay and live a more peaceful life after S2 while Crowley has yet to be truly able to evade Lucifer.

While Lindsay's abuse of Nina is at least psychological and emotional in what we are shown and Lucifer's abuse of Crowley is that with physical and sexual aspects that may or may not be present in Nina's relationship with Lindsay, the type of abuse doesn't matter to the parallel as it's all terrible and that's the point. Lucifer's abuse of Crowley is paralleled with the intimate partner abuse Nina is suffering in her relationship. This is objectively pretty interesting since it sort of suggests that Lucifer is Crowley's Lindsay, in the sense that they might have once been involved pre-Fall, which might add another element to why Lucifer is fixated on Crowley.

So, while Crowley can encourage his parallel Nina all he wants to take a risk and trust more and to trust him when he promises that it will be worth it, Crowley himself can't really extract himself from his own Lindsay-ish situation yet. He does know how to survive it, though, and it's not all about the defenses he and Nina put up-- it's about learning to shed some of those defenses enough to have a sense of intimacy with a kind person you can trust to love you and help you feel safe.

#ineffable husbands #good omens #crowley #aziraphale #good omens 2 #good omens meta #aziracrow

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guardian5tiger3 · 11 months

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PICK A GIF

Tarot & intuitive messages from spirit.

What did /do your dream(s) mean? .

Options

2. 3.

Option 1

So your dreams come off pretty fantasy like , not as based in this reality and it's probably just cause that's what you're soul is craving right now. That's super dope. I thought of dragon tales that old kids show for some reason but I can see how for someone that energy matches. So you really look at dreaming time as an opportunity to be free. But I think whatever goes on in your dreams it is real dimensions you're in. I see you seriously visiting aliens and people you want to see in your waking hours. You might fight some people sometimes. All of this just seems like you're doing things that you desire to do when you're awake so you're kind of just being more free and adventurous when you are in the sleeping state. If any of you are having nightmares it is symbolic of something you're trying to resist. But I'm not even sure if you guys remember your dreams or the ones I just read about lol. Super dope though. Like really .aliens. Damn.

Option 2

Okay the energy I'm getting so far is kind of off...you guys if the dreams are bad or good are doing a lot of healing work in your dreams ,mostly for yourself. You guys really seem like you're having nightmares or just offputting dreams like weird or creepy almost. But a lot of this is sort of like a blessing in disguise cause somehow you're using it to your advantage to heal , like I said. I think your subconscious mind uses your dreams to confront fears so it's easier on you whatever you may be scared of in your waking reality.

It seems like you guys are healers and or super deep individuals and I think the dreams you're having are making you feel significantly better and come off that way to others because of the healing you're doing in your sleep. ⭐awesome you guys. Proud of y'all.💗

Option 3

At the end of this guess what song came on the radio‼️dream on by Aerosmith. Please go listen to it.

Seems like you're dreaming of things that are helping you cope with your reality when you're awake. You might be dreaming of someone you know in this reality. It kind of seems like a crush of yours for some of you I'm sure it is or it is a desirable version of someone that was or is in your life. I'm being guided to suggest that you guys look into other readings you guys also feel free to request one from me you can message me if you want or you can also make an ask anonymous . I think spirit wants to tell you a lot bout other subjects. Spirit loves you guys so much it seems like some of you are really fighting and the song that just came on I'm just getting that they really want you to go within your heart and soul because that's where your paradise lies and I can't even explain this energy almost but it reminds me of my younger self. Not that much younger like me my whole life and I just had a breakthrough onto better things about a year ago. You are a sweet beautiful warrior soul and you don't have any clue how loved you are. I'm getting teary eyed. You guys seriously message me and I will give you a reading any one you want or general.

This isn't gonna resonate with everybody , but the next song that came on the radio is called heart and soul by t'pau.

One love 💛

#free tarot readings #pac reading #pick a card reading #pac #pac tarot #pick a card #pick a picture #pick a pile #tarot pac #tarot reading #tarot free reading #free tarot #spirit message #intuitive messages #psychic messages #channeled message #message for the collective

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luminnara · 2 years

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Maneater | Billy Hargrove x demon!reader NSFW (18+ ONLY)

There’s a new girl in town…and she’s got a killer beauty routine.

AKA Billy x Jennifer’s Body style reader

Requests and commissions are open!

@smenny @infinitelyforgotten @littlewinter1917 @djiafjaidjcj

Warnings: violence, cannibalism (sorta? Reader is a demon so technically not?) eating people lol, sexual talk, flirtin, smut

(I tried really hard to find a cropped version of this gif but I couldn’t 😩)

You always felt your best after a good night’s beauty sleep, your usual skincare routine, and devouring a boy or two. Sure, it was a little unorthodox, and it was the result of a virgin sacrifice gone wrong (seriously, how did those creepy band dudes think you were a virgin? Ouch), but it was your thing now, and you were totally owning it.

The best part? You wouldn’t have any problems finding fresh meat in your new home of Hawkins, Indiana, because you knew that no matter where you went, there were always going to be stupid, horny boys just begging for you to play around in their chest cavities. You could go just about anywhere and still be able to do your thing, and even though you were in the middle of buttfuck nowhere Indiana, you were excited to check out the locals. Maybe size them up.

Look for someone yummy.

It was a gorgeous spring morning, and you felt amazing. You felt like you could do anything, and you could—when you were full and happy, you were way more powerful than a normal human. Those shitty band guys may have been total idiots, but at least you got some cool new powers out of their silly little ritual. On the outside, you looked gorgeous, with clear, practically glowing skin, a charming smile, and bright eyes…but on the inside, you were a monster straight from hell.

And that didn’t bother you one bit.

Hawkins High was a small school. The parking lot wasn’t even paved. The junior high was right across the driveway. Despite the…quaintness of it all, however, everyone milling around by their cars looked like they all thought they were hot shit. There were groups of girls standing around, snapping their gum and twirling their hair as they gossiped. There were guys in letterman jackets, shoving each other around for fun. There was one boy with impressively nice hair, and one who screamed metal head trailer trash.

Some of them looked like their families had money. Some looked like they were from the wrong side of the tracks. Some were nerds, some were band geeks, some were desperately trying to fit in with the popular clique…they were all equal in your eyes, no matter how different they seemed. They were all fresh meat, and they probably all tasted just fine.

“Who the hell is that?” Carol asked, shoving Tommy aside to get a better look.

Her boyfriend stumbled slightly, irritated that she had cut him off just as he was finally getting handsy with her for the first time in two weeks. “Who?”

“Look, idiot,” Carol snapped.

She grabbed him by the jacket and forced him to turn. When he did, he saw that she was looking at someone he didn’t recognize—

Someone hot.

Someone real hot.

“Goddamn,” he breathed, his eyes glued to you as you sauntered through the lot. “Hargrove. Hey.”

Billy wasn’t listened. Instead, he was leaning against his Camaro as he lit a cigarette and tried to pretend that his ribs weren’t bruised. When Tommy grabbed at his shirt, he immediately stiffened and sneered, straightening up and catching the other boy’s arm.

“The hell is your problem?” He growled.

“Check out the new girl.”

Billy’s grip loosened slightly, teeth clenching around his cigarette as his eyes left Tommy. He found you way more interesting to focus on, anyways, and he was immediately interested.

He grinned, clapping Tommy’s shoulder as he straightened up and moved in your direction.

“Where’re you goin?” Tommy called after him.

“To give our new compatriot a friendly, Hawkins welcome,” Billy replied, a wild look in his eyes as he followed you through the front doors.

You stopped by the office for your schedule and locker number, playing nice and dumb with the secretary. You laughed whenever she did, you said thank you when you took your papers from her, and you gave her a charming smile that you knew would win anybody over. If she was any indicator, Hawkins would be even easier to settle into than you thought.

When you stepped out the door, you nearly ran face first into someone.

Someone who smelled delicious.

“Oh, sorry,” you immediately turned on the charm as your eyes traveled up his broad chest. When they settled on his face, you were surprised to see that he was absolutely gorgeous…and something in his gaze sent a little shiver up your spine.

“No need to apologize, sweetheart,” he smirked. “Name’s Billy.”

You could tell he was checking you out. Boys always did, especially when you were feeling well fed and full of yourself. There was some sort of magnetic pull that drew them in, like the sweet smell of a carnivorous plant beckoning insects forward. Billy definitely wasn’t an insect…but he might make a nice meal nonetheless.

You bit your lower lip and batted your lashes at him. “Wanna show me around, Billy? I don’t know where my new locker is…”

Billy wanted to laugh.

Did you think he was stupid? He knew his way around flirting. He was the king of playing nice to get what he wanted, whether it be slipping into someone’s pants or getting information. Billy could tell that you were pretending to be sugary and sweet with him…but what were you hiding underneath this practically otherworldly exterior?

You were a lot more interesting than he had originally thought, apparently.

“Yeah, I’ll show you around, sweetheart.” He winked.

“Thank you, handsome,” you said, your voice dripping with honey.

It was obvious that he wanted to get in your pants. You knew boys well enough to know that much. He was being sweet and charming to get what he wanted, kind of like you did…and you figured that would make him a nice and easy target.

You walked down the hall with him, looking up at his face and studying what you could see. He had a nice, strong jaw, and thick, curly hair cut into a mullet. His eyes were the brightest blue you’d ever seen, and as he watched rest of the student body, you noticed that they were incredibly observant.

Like a hawk looking for fat little rabbits.

“So where’re you from, sweetheart?” He drawled boredly, as if small talk wasn’t his thing at all.

“…a little town called Devil’s Kettle. You probably haven’t heard of it.” You shrugged, determined to show him that small talk absolutely was your thing. “I like Hawkins a lot more.”

Rather than go along with you, Billy rolled his eyes.

He actually rolled his eyes.

At you.

A demon.

You were a little taken aback, to say the least. Your natural, passive charm was enough to keep any human nice and quiet and complacent until it was time to turn it off and enjoy their terror. So why did Billy have such an attitude with you still?

“You don’t have to flatter me. There’s nothing good about this shit hole.” He said. “Well…‘Cept you, of course.”

Your eyes narrowed slightly. Alright, then. This guy had an attitude, but it was nothing you couldn’t handle. He still smelled and looked delicious, and you had a few more days to figure him out before you needed to feed again. Ever since that ritual left you this way, you’d found yourself enjoying playing with your food…and Billy was no exception.

“Thank you so much for your help,” you said, laying it on thick as you stopped next to your locker.

Your hand found its way to his chest, a move that always had boys rolling over for you. Billy looked down at it and smirked, an absolutely beautiful sight, before his eyes trailed back up to yours.

Your heart skipped a beat.

“Anytime, princess.” He said, his voice smooth, its timbre sending a rush straight down between your thighs.

And then, he was gone, melting back into the crowded hallway, leaving alone to figure out what the hell just happened.

———————

“What the hell is she doing?” Carol asked haughtily.

Vicky wrinkled her nose. “Walking with Billy to his car.”

Carol let out a disgusted sound and turned away, determined not to show her jealousy. You’d only been in Hawkins for what, one day? Twenty four hours, at most? And Billy Hargrove was already giving you a ride home?

Ridiculous.

Tommy H just smirked. “Nice one, Hargrove!” He called out as he leaned against his car.

Carol glared at him.

You heard his shout and turned to look toward its source. You were still confused about Billy…but that moron looked like he might be a good snack in a day or two.

You gave him a wink, watching as his girlfriend fumed next to him.

“You’ve got nice friends.” You commented as Billy opened the passenger door and waited for you to sit down.

“…yeah. Nice.” He snorted, slamming it closed before walking around to his side and getting in.

“How long have you been in Hawkins?” You asked, studying your nails as the Camaro roared to life.

Okay, so you liked his car. Maybe you could steal it after you ate him…? No, that would be way too obvious in a town like this. Everybody would know you had something to do with his disappearance.

Damn.

“Six months. Somethin’ like that.” He said absentmindedly as he backed out of his space. “Why’s that matter, princess?”

You shrugged. “You don’t look like everybody else here.”

You don’t smell like everybody else here.

He grinned in what might have been triumph. “That’s a fucking relief.”

“You definitely don’t look like a local...” you purred, your fingers gliding up his arm. You gave his bicep a squeeze through his jacket and saw him lick his lips from the corner of your eye, and you knew you were getting somewhere.

Okay. This was okay. You could totally have some fun with him, shove all those weird feelings aside, and then do your thing and devour his innards like a good little demon. No more second guessing yourself, though. Time to be a big, confident succubus.

“Can we go somewhere...private, handsome?” you asked, voice dripping with that golden honey as you leaned against him.

“Your place or mine, sweetheart?” he grinned down at you.

“...Yours.” you decided. Today was about having fun and celebrating your move. Next time, you’d take him back to your new house and tear him to shreds.

For sure you would.

For real.

Never mind how genuinely cute you found him. You were gonna wreck this guy, in more ways than one.

You could tell that Billy was excited at the prospect of getting laid. You could smell it rolling off of him in waves, and for you, those pheromones were like a drug. They made you feel happy and floaty, your chest buzzing as he squeezed your thigh and put the pedal to the metal.

“You always drive like this?” you asked, laughing loudly over the sound of the radio and the wind whipping through the open windows.

Billy glanced over to see you smiling, and he grinned. “You like it, sweetheart?”

“I love it!” you replied without thinking about your cool demon persona for once.

Billy’s grin just grew wider and he floored it, tearing down the quiet highway towards his place.

His house was small and simple, decorated conservatively in a way that told you his folks weren’t very much fun. He didn’t give you much time to take it all in, though, quickly ushering you down the hall and into his room before you could make yourself at home.

“You in a rush?” you quipped.

“Can you blame me for being eager?” he smirked as he shut the door.

No. You really couldn’t.

Being alone in a room with Billy Hargrove felt special. So many girls at Hawkins High would probably kill for the chance to cozy up with him like this, and yet there you were, on your very first day in town, climbing on top of him like you owned his soul.

Wait...was that an option? Could you do that? It might be a nicer option than eating him at this point, because honestly...you were starting to think you should keep him around for a little longer than originally planned. Like, for real…it took a lot to satisfy a demon like yourself, and somehow, Billy Hargrove was managing to do it.

Maybe it was because in bed, he absolutely dripped sin and sex appeal. His hands? Killer. His dick? Perfect. His mouth?

Godly.

“F-fuck!” You gasped, mouth agape, eyes wide as you gripped his hair and pulled hard.

He grunted against you, looking up from his place between your thighs. Fuck, he was glad you wore a skirt, because the second he got you in his room, he was tossing you down on his bed and diving right in. If he had to fuck around with jeans or some bullshit like that, he’d have been seriously pissed off.

Instead, all he had to do was grab your hips, pull your panties to the side, and let your moans serenade him as he showed you how fucking good he was with his tongue.

Normally, he’d be the one guiding your head right now, not the other way around. He’d be quick and demanding, get his kicks, make you finish with his fingers or something, and then get outta there. That’s what he always did with girls, and it was always fast and fun. Hollow, in a way, but fun. With you, though…with you, he was determined to savor everything, because you tasted delicious in a way he’d never experienced before, and he couldn’t get enough.

“Billy…” you moaned, grinding your hips against his face as you felt yourself getting close again. Perks of being a demon, you guessed…lots and lots of orgasms.

He was lapping it all up like it was ambrosia, eyes trained on you obediently.

He had really, really beautiful eyes, and as you gazed into them, you came again.

“O-okay,” you huffed, thighs shaking as you yanked his head back. “That’s enough.”

You felt him resist, trying to get one last taste, but you were stronger than you looked.

And you also had an appetite that needed to be sated.

“Your turn, big boy,” you purred, switching your positions.

Billy was more than happy to recline and watch as you unbuckled his belt and unzipped his jeans. As much as he wanted you to sit on his face for a few hours, he was eager to find out if the rest of you was just as sweet.

You were just happy to see that his dick matched the rest of him.

There was no point in trying to hide your glee as you freed him from the confines of his tight jeans, and you immediately wrapped a hand around his shaft and your lips around his head. He shuddered at the feeling of your mouth on him, a hand coming to rest on the back of your head as he made a move to guide you. You didn’t need him to, but you let him pretend he had some semblance of control as you bobbed up and down, and honestly? It was pretty cute that he thought he was in charge.

His cock slipped deeper into your throat, until your nose was brushing his pelvis. You were surrounded by his scent, that natural, musky smell and—cologne? Did he put cologne down there? Yeah, that was kinda cute—and it made you hungrier.

When you leaned back, he tried to follow you, searching for that warmth again…but when you pushed him down against his own mattress and sank down onto his cock, his eyes widened.

“No rubber?” He asked.

You just smiled and leaned down, hands on his chest as you licked the side of his face. “Don’t worry about it, baby.”

Fuck, you were perfect.

And you were weirdly warm.

“Fuck, baby…” he groaned, hands squeezing your ass as you rode him.

You felt fucking perfect, and he knew he was gonna have to come back for seconds, something he almost never did in Hawkins.

Because Billy Hargrove was hooked on you…and when you watched his face as he came, you realized you were a little hooked on him, too.

Shit.

He was too cute to eat.

“So.” He said as you rolled to the side, catching your breath. “What’s your deal?”

“My deal?” You asked, eyes flicking toward him.

He lit a cigarette. “There’s somethin’ up with you, babe. Knew it from the second we talked this morning.”

You floundered, staring at him. What did he mean? Guys never guessed that you were anything other than hot. Nobody had ever suspected that there was something supernatural about you, not even your best friends back in Devil’s Kettle.

“I don’t normally do this whole…talking thing.” Billy said. “But you’ve got me intrigued, princess. So what’s the deal?”

“I have no idea what you’re—“

“Cut the shit,” he growled, surprising you again with how easily he fought through your natural defenses. “You’re hiding something. I can tell.”

“Did you fuck me just to grill me?” You asked in irritation.

“Nah. That was just a bonus.” He grinned, reaching down to brush his fingers over your swollen clit. When you immediately flinched, he laughed. “You sure are sensitive, babe…”

You rolled your eyes and sat up. “I don’t know why you think something’s up, but I don’t appreciate it, Hargrove.”

He raised his lip in a sneer. “Fine. Don’t tell me. But I’ll figure you out eventually, sweetheart.”

You just narrowed your eyes.

——————

Billy’s suspicions weren’t enough to keep you from hanging around him. You liked the resident bad boy, even though his friends were annoying, and he seemed to enjoy keeping and arm slung around your shoulders in public. For a few days, everything was fine…until you felt yourself starting to fade, and you knew it was time for a snack.

It was easy enough to pick a boy out of the crowd, some senior whose name you didn’t bother to learn. When Billy was busy with sports, you chose your victim and whispered in his ear, leading him out of the building, across the parking lot, and into the woods. He thought he was about to get lucky; after all, rumors had begun flying about how easy you were, after everybody saw Billy Hargrove giving you a ride on your very first day in town. This guy probably thought he was about to get a once in a lifetime opportunity with the hottest girl in town.

“Don’t count on it,” you grinned dangerously before shoving him back against a tree trunk.

You watched his expression change from confusion to horror as your jaw unhinged and your teeth elongated, ready to sink into his flesh and tear him apart. As soon as you made contact, you flew into a frenzy, ripping his rib cage open with your hands and digging in.

Delicious, as always.

As you tore chunks out of his chest cavity, you thought about Billy. You imagined the feeling of his hands on you, squeezing your thighs and your hips…you could picture his face looking down at you, cheeks flushed and lips parted, and those gorgeous blue eyes…

Your fantasy was interrupted by a sudden pain in your torso, and when you looked down, you saw that your victim had managed to shove a huge, sharp tree branch straight through you.

“Ouch.” You said.

You coughed up some blood.

“That’s what I get for being distracted at dinner, huh?”

You heard the boy gasping, desperately clinging to life even with his organs out on display. Well, this wasn’t really how you thought this would go…and shit, it was really starting to hurt.

With one last chomp that finally silenced your victim, you let his body fall to the ground and stumbled back. You were in worse shape than you thought, and your little house out in the woods was pretty fucking far away. You needed somewhere safe to go in the meantime, somewhere you could curl up and wait for your body to heal itself.

By the time you limped up to Billy’s window, night had fallen…but his light was still on, and with any luck, he was alone and free of other girls. You really didn’t have it in you to tear someone else apart, not while you were in this state. You shuffled up to the window sill, gripping it with bloody hands and thumping against it weakly.

Billy immediately stiffened.

He was fresh out of the shower, wearing nothing but a towel around his waist. He had been considering jerking off to the thought of you before bed, but now, the sound of something outside had him on high alert. He’d already been stressed thanks to his father yelling at the dinner table earlier, and the last thing he needed was some weird bullshit to deal with.

Unfortunately, when he opened his window, that’s exactly what he got.

“What--the fuck--” he stammered, eyes wide as you tumbled in and landed in a bloody heap on his floor.

“H-hey,” you panted, chest heaving with effort as you pulled yourself into a more comfortable position.

Billy just stared.

“I--I know this looks crazy,” you said, grunting in pain when you managed to sit up against his bed. “I just need to rest here--”

“What are you?” he interrupted.

“I don’t know what you--”

“I told you to cut the shit the other day.” he growled. “Now I really fucking mean it, princess.”

You looked up at him, still breathing hard. “...You have to swear not to freak out.”

“Try me.”

“So...back in Devil’s Kettle, there’s this weird waterfall. Some guys offered me up to Satan on a platter, I guess, and then tossed me down...only their ritual didn’t work. And now I’m...like this.” you gestured to yourself.

Billy was taking things surprisingly well. “Like what?”

“Like...a demon.”

You watched his face closely, waiting for the inevitable. Waiting for the panic.

It didn’t come, though. Honestly, Billy didn’t even know why he wasn’t totally losing it, especially given the state you were in--covered in blood, a huge wound in the middle of your stomach--but as he sat down across from you, he barely felt anxious.

“So...what’s with the blood?” he asked, reaching for a smoke.

“...Okay, now you really can’t freak out.”

“Fine, sweetheart.”

“I just...had dinner, and dinner...fought back.”

He raised an eyebrow, but he didn’t press further...so you spared him the details, lest he end up having a weaker stomach than he pretended to. “I just need a couple hours to heal and then I’ll be gone. Swear.”

“Neil and Susan are still gone. Max is in bed.” he said as he calmly lit a cigarette. “Go shower before you get that shit all over my stuff.”

You blinked. “You’re really not...weirded out by all this?”

“I told you I knew something was up with you.” he smirked. “Didn’t know it was this weird, but I still fucking knew.”

You let out a breathy little laugh at that and tried to stand. When your knees buckled, Billy caught you with one arm, choosing to haul you to the bathroom himself. And then, he joined you, because even though it was probably the strangest situation he’d ever been in, you were still you, and you were still hot, an even if you were a demon, you were kinda his demon now...and he wasn’t gonna pass up the chance to shower with you.

#billy hargrove #Billy Hargrove x reader #billy hargrove x y/n #billy hargrove x demon!reader #demon!reader #jennifer's body #stranger things

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