hi, I just wonder if you will continue writing a Softest Touch?
Hi Nonnie! (and everyone else who is wondering, I guess)
Let’s start with: Yes, I’m still writing Softest Touch
But... It will be slow progress.
Currently, the second half of Chapter 24 is whooping my ass, but I hope I’ll get it out this month. 💙
Basically, I’m a really slow writer. Most of Slightest Touch and Softest Touch was written in drafts in 2018 to 2020, allowing me to update more or less twice a month after I started posting. But these ran out halfway through Softest Touch and now I have barely anything to fall back on, which meant it was Snail Speed from then on.
Also, with life picking up speed and not allowing me to hole into my room for days to an end and me finishing my studies this year (yeah, master thesis, please don’t hurt my nerves too much...) my time to create has also dwindled down to what feels like nothing.
Still, I’ll finish this story because I hate walking away from unfinished business and it would nag me till my dying day, but even though it’s only 4 more chapters (at least currently planned...) it will still take me some time to get to the end of this.
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the world put you in front of me and we aligned
pairing: ryomen sukuna x reader
word count: ~1.5k
short description: the king of curses has never been asked for comfort before, but that doesn't mean he won't indulge you.
notes: no beta barely edited probably ooc; no content warnings just the fluffiest lil thing you'll ever get from me, mwah! manga credit used for header image [nsfw, 18+]!
"Tell me what you need, little one, while I still feel patient."
"Well I-I... I don't know how to ask for that," you reply sheepishly, ducking your head to hide the flush that was starting to prickle across your cheeks at your own discomfort. Two fingers caught your chin, evading your retreat into yourself, tilting doe eyes back into the intense, scarlet-hot gaze of the man towering over you still, not one to back away from an uncomfortable situation so easily.
"Use your words, brat," Sukuna purrs cheekily in return, gravelly and low but warm like molasses, trying to lure you out of whatever self-conscious spiral he was watching you fall into - it wouldn't work. Not when he was willing and able to catch you.
The way he touched you, the way he looked at you, the way he spoke to you: it would sound silly if you tried to say it out loud, but there was no other word that came to mind but reverence. Utter devotion or nothing at all, there was no in between with someone like him. Were you projecting? Did the passion between you two feel too good to be true, not because of him, but because of you?
Because you couldn't handle being seen by him, could you?
It wasn't easy, but it was familiar; you didn't, couldn't, ask for help, because you didn't have the vocabulary to explain what you needed help with, exactly. No one could snap their fingers and make all your problems go away; if they could, you wouldn't ask for that, because a charmed life had no real value. And yet... no matter what you said, there was an unflappable feeling in your gut that Sukuna would scorch the earth to give you whatever you desired, the closest thing to a god you may ever see.
"I just want you to hold me," and the words sounded silly as soon as they left your mouth. He was a CURSE for god's sake, or at least, he was one. By all accounts, he was a monster, a being of the lowest morale, and there was nothing that would make him to succumb to the petty whims of the human he just so happened to have a dalliance with. A blip on his cosmic radar, a temporary satisfaction in an endless lifetime. He didn't have the time to waste, the capacity to care, the attachment to give --
Except as soon as the words left your mouth, the smallest of smirks twitched the sides of his lips. As always, you yielded when given a command, and he was always filled with a silent pride by your willingness to succumb for him. Without a word, Sukuna scooped you from the couch bridal-style, earning him a startled yip that turned his smile wider. You felt the echo of his chuckle rumble deep in his chest as he carried you into the bedroom, a protest on your lips that this isn't what you meant, not everything was a code for sex... "Sukuna, I..."
The complaint died in your throat though, not having time to manifest as you squeaked instead; Sukuna had kneed his way onto the bed, still not dropping you as he set his back against the headboard and gingerly, with all the tenderness in the world, set you down across his lap. It would've brought tears to your eyes, if you hadn't been so bewildered by this side of your lover, one who got you both off thanks to his penchant for sadism, but this time...
This time, he used his immense reach to grab the comforter, pulling it over your bodies. This time, he used the hand still wrapped around your back, propping you up, to begin tucking in the seams of the blanket, bounding you tightly against him. This time, the heat of your combined body warmth overpowered your cyclone spin of anxiety. This time, his free hand came up to cup your cheek for a moment, looking into your watery, hazy hues before placing the most delicate kiss against your forehead. This time, you would even call him chaste, not a word you ever imagined using in reference to Sukuna. This time, he looked for nothing more, wordlessly pulling your face into his chest as the arm around your back tightened its hold. This time, he really did just... just hold you.
It was too much.
By the time your cheek had pressed against heat of his skin, you were a goner. Maybe you were just that obvious - maybe he saw how pathetic and hopeless you felt, and knew that no amount of his usual teasing would cajole you out of your reverie. You're not sure he could feel sadness; you're not really sure he ever had, but you appreciated this act of softness from him. (He could, though rarely, and he did, though oftentimes only because of you, or in this case, for you). Shaking like a leaf in the wind, you curled as far into him as you possibly could, and with a heave, an onslaught of tears began to leave your body like the damn had broken at the end of a wet summer.
Where did he learn comfort like this? A large palm rested against your lower back, splayed open and anchoring you to his lap, not letting you budge an inch, even if you wanted to. His other hand had curled around the side of your neck to its nape, pressing you against him, silently insisting you stay as near to him as possible, to ride out whatever anxiety had taken you so far from him tonight. He would wait. You had only asked to be held, so he remained silently, trying not to focus on the way your pathetic little hiccups would make his heart squeeze, or why the white-hot lick of anger curled beneath his skin at seeing you in this state.
The more you succumbed to your sadness, though, the worse it seemed to get; the riptide of emotion had grabbed you by the ankle and sought to drown you in its depths tonight. Sukuna noticed immediately when your breaths had grown panicked and short, hiccups faltering into staccato sobs, and your heart began hammering out of rhythm with his own.
No, no, that would not do. You were supposed to be soothed. You couldn't see his brow furrow sullenly, confusion flickering behind maroon eyes, a sound akin to a growl unfurling in his chest. His exasperation with your befuddling human emotions was short-lived. The growing rumble in his chest had finally moored all your senses to the same shore, grounding you in tandem with the anchor points of physical touch.
Once he realized you liked it - and he should've realized you'd like it, you often enjoyed his primal sounds in other scenarios, too - well, of course he continued, your emotional fulfillment his main concern at the moment.
You must be dreaming. That was the only thought in your head as your hiccups waned into pitiful sniffles, doe eyes sore and half-lidded in the shelter of Sukuna's chest. "R-ryo...?" you managed to bleat, softer than he'd ever heard his name on your lips before, and the use of his first name had your lover purring again with a low timbre hum, giving your entire form an encouraging squeeze to signify his attention.
"Don't go... please, don't go," you whined, barely above a whisper, and something in chest shattered at your unwillingness to be without him, now that you had let him in to that tightly locked room he'd call your heart. If he had thought dominating your physical body had been pleasurable, there was an absolute intoxication that came from you being this kind of vulnerable with him; where he had always assumed he'd feel disgust, he felt a dizzying delight in pacifying you this way, still a dance of your bodies, just with different choreography than he'd ever known before.
"Oh, little one," the king of curses assuaged in a tone of equal measure, his whisper husked as he ducked to kiss your forehead again, reveling in the enchanting sigh he earned from you at such a simple affection. With that, he began to rustle you into place for sleep, more delicately than he'd ever handled you before; though, it could be noted that he was still a selfish man, and didn't give you any room to move or curl away from him, intent to keep you tucked against his chest for the rest of time if it meant witnessing you like this, at your most docile.
Your pretty face was folded into the juncture where his chest met his neck, and he could feel your breathing settle into dreamy sighs, comforted and cared for exactly the way you'd asked, so trustful that you would dare to sleep in his presence, the sweetest of lambs curled up and comfortable in the middle of the lion's den. He could kill you, right there. He would kill for you, right then.
"There is nowhere I could go that I could not take you," Sukuna promised softly into the darkness of your room, hoping you'd hear his promise in your dreams. Now that he knew this, he never wanted to know anything again.
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ENCHANTED APRIL SENTENCE STARTERS.
taken from the 1991 film, an adaptation of the 1922 novel by elizabeth von arnim. feel free to change wording and pronouns and provide context as necessary. do not add to this list.
“it seems so wonderful and it's such a miserable day.”
“it’s not worth wasting one’s time thinking about.”
“i don’t suppose that means much to you. sometimes it doesn’t mean much to me, either.”
“you look as though you wanted it as much as i do.”
“you look so beautiful and so sad.”
“if you wish for something hard enough, it happens.”
“but no one will know I’m there even if i am.”
“have you ever seen things in a kind of flash before they happen?”
“i’m sure it must be wrong to be good for so long you become miserable.”
“i can see you’ve been good for years, and you aren’t happy.”
“i’ve been doing things for other people since i was a little girl, and i don’t believe i’m loved any better.”
“you must believe I’ve never spoken to anyone like this in my life.”
“i don’t know what’s come over me.”
“you should have been there, my dear. i missed you.”
“that’s rather a depressing thought.”
“god must know an awful lot. why doesn’t he do something?”
“there’s something immoral about all this.”
“all i wish to do is sit in the shade and remember better times and better men.”
“i hope you’re not in the habit of seeing dead people, however distinguished. it’s not in the best of taste.”
“i mean, we’re not businessmen, are we? they have to distrust each other.”
“i want to just sit and not talk and not think.”
“well, it’s very wearing. everyone makes demands… especially men.”
“you look lovely.” / “i know. thank you, name.”
“we could both do with a change.”
“it really is the most extraordinary coincidence.”
“I’m afraid it’s all settled, name. i can’t go back on my word.”
“do you suppose it’s all real?”
“were you ever in your whole life so happy?”
“i promised myself the first thing to happen in this place would be a kiss.”
“we were going to choose the nicest room for you.”
“we were going to make it pretty for you with lots of flowers.”
“you shouldn’t be so independent that people have no chance to be generous.”
“you know, i hadn’t realized you were so pretty.”
“you’re really quite lovely.”
“i was just thinking about cuckoos for some reason.”
“i suppose you realize we’ve got to heaven.”
“i intend to spend most of my time reading by myself.”
“you have the most interesting habit of answering a question with the same question.”
“if i can be left quiet for one month, forget things… i might be able to get myself straight.”
“i’ve wasted so much time being beautiful.”
“what she really wants is to be left alone.”
“soon she won’t have to try… she’ll just be herself without trying.”
“don’t worry about me. I’m just lying here thinking.”
“then i have had all the trouble of coming out here for nothing.”
“we’ve just discovered it.”
“why don’t you like us being here?”
“we just didn’t know about it, that’s all.”
“i’ve written and told him everything.”
“it would be mean not to share all this.”
“the important thing is to have lots of love about.”
“i had this obsession with justice, you see.”
“i’d like to stay here and think.”
“that’s very imprudent and very improper.”
“have you noticed how difficult it is to be improper with no men about?”
“it’s a good feeling, getting rid of things.”
“i want to love name, but not necessarily spend every night with him.”
“i haven’t felt this restless since i was a child.”
“it’s too absurd for someone my age.”
“i feel something is going to happen. but i won’t let it.”
“it’s odd how one’s mind slips sideways in a place like this.”
“if you knew me, you’d know how strange it was.”
“there’s no way back.”
“isn’t it beautiful here, name? the air is golden.”
“you’re here. that’s the important thing.”
“you’ve every right to be angry with me.”
“where else would you meet such interesting people?”
“i don’t want name worried in any way.”
“i like him. I didn’t think i would, but i do.”
“all the advantages i was born with, and i’ve misused them.”
“i have it all. why can’t i hold onto it?”
“you have a gift for happiness.”
“well, it’s like coming home.”
“i mean, well… i don’t know what i mean.”
“i’d believe any place you lived in would be exactly like you.”
“isn’t it better to feel young somewhere than old everywhere?”
“oh, good gracious, child.”
“so you see, dear boy, you must stay here.”
“it’s such a pretty story.”
“i thought you might be bored.”
“sweetheart… i’m so glad you came.”
“you’re right, name. it’s this place.”
“and i’m late on your very first evening. do forgive me.”
“it’s a great thing to get on with one’s loving and not waste time.”
“she sees what we can’t see because she loves him.”
“oh, dear name, we must be friends forever and forever.”
“i couldn’t help noticing how miserable you seemed.”
“oh, what the devil. it’s too beautiful a night to be miserable.”
“all my dead friends don’t seem worth reading tonight. they always say the same things, good things, but always the same.”
“i’m tired of the dead. i want the living.”
“thank you, my dear. i was feeling a little melancholy.”
“it does seem that people can only be happy in pairs, all sorts of pairs.” / “then you and i will be a pair, name. we’re going to be very good friends.”
“the roses are in love in the rose garden.”
“but that’s another story.”
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