slightly frustrating doctor’s appointment today because my doctor seemed pretty set on not taking me seriously that something is wrong. she basically told me that i flagged pretty high on the depression questionnaire so maybe it’s just depression (when literally all the questions were like “do you feel lethargic and unmotivated and unfocused?” which are all also symptoms of being physically unwell) and didn’t seem to take it seriously when i told her that i’ve been depressed plenty of times in my life and i know that that’s not what i’m experiencing right now. she also tried to tell me that maybe i’m just stressed about my board exams (which…. i’m really not at all) and i’m just feeling frustrated because i’ve been feeling so awful lately and i had a lot of hope riding on this appointment
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EY & HJ stealing parallels
EY | HJ | Details
We’ve seen Eunyung get wrongfully accused of stealing twice:
The first time, his dad leaned down and directly told him to apologize, not even asking if he really did do it. When EY insisted he was innocent, his dad did not believe him. Instead, he shamed EY into apologizing for sth he didn’t do. His dad leaning down was a manipulation tactic.
The second time, HJ leaned down to ask him if he did it, EY said no, and HJ believed him no questions asked. Bc that's how his mom had reacted to him stealing. HJ leaning down was to show EY he wasn't alone and that he had someone who trusted and supported him.
(^^ HJ's reaction really surprised him compared to what his past experience with his dad looked like. EY didn't expect anyone to believe him, he's not used to that. Then guilt and dread kicked in when HJ said he trusted him bc he had intended to steal sth but ultimately didn't and held himself back ->)
When there was concrete proof EY didn’t do it, he even stood up for him. HJ asked the shop owner to apologize to EY the way his mom had asked for an apology for him when he was little.
But their reactions to said request were different: HJ thought his mom was really cool for standing up for him like that.
Whereas EY thought HJ asking for an apology was extremely embarrassing. He didn't even give the guy the chance to apologize before walking away (<- he probably felt he didn't deserve it bc he had almost stolen sth).
HJ did what he learned from his mom, and it almost worked. Unfortunately, EY isn’t used to basic human decency and apologies, so he rather removed himself from the situation to avoid another confrontation and further humiliation.
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I think that in the Pollution Powers AU I've been slowly spitballing on here, Angie doesn't discover she has toxic kisses after kissing someone who then gets sick. since the toxin is present in her saliva (hence the toxic kisses), it means she can't share food or drink with anyone. but she doesn't know about that right away.
it takes multiple incidences of people getting ill after sharing food or drink with Angie (mostly bc Angie's trying to be nice and is like "oh this is really good do you want to try a bite?") for the Authorities at the boarding school to finally figure out the mysterious illnesses can all be traced back to her.
after determining Angie to be the source of the illnesses, some Testing is done and that's when the pesticide/herbicide is found in her saliva. and Angie is told to keep her saliva far away from her classmates.
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the story they had orchestrated. (chromatic conundrum)
It’s just a game. (That was the premise.) Though, for Valter it was very real. There had been precautions, yes, to ensure the safety of the participants, but beyond all that, it was life and death and interrogation—the search for truth had been legitimate.
The time ticked down to 11:12pm, when at last, the body fell—hah. (He knew he was going to survive.) He had gone about searching, piecing together the story of the murder, checking clues and making certain that the fragments fell into place.
When the trial finally began, Monsieur Brunette had felt ready. In broad terms, he had an order of events, a preconceived notion of the killer and the story they had orchestrated. That notion proved to be wrong, the first half of the trial a waste.
So it became a matter of placing evidence, tying threads, breaking knots. Eventually they would uncover the truth—would they not?—so long as they kept moving (so long as he kept thinking, deducing, contriving). Just keep marching forward, and you will arrive where you wish eventually.
It circles back to a formerly accused—he doesn’t know why (they had already cleared him)—but time was ticking, and they could waste theirs, but Valter was going to solve this mystery (that was the task he knew he could accomplish).
A new story is fabricated, and the actress fails to dissuade the illusion. It fails, also, to shatter—the other was voted to be the killer.
Had he failed in his persuasion? (His case was clear, founded on solid evidence.) To have been outdone—by a buffoon’s work, no less—was an insult he could never forgive. He withdraws into himself, lest his rage bubble too closely to the surface.
And it boils, quietly, dangerous all the same. He had really lost? Him, really? Please. (It was unthinkable.) But who could deny it? With victory in his palm, he had been careless to secure it, pressured to haste.
The killer stays quiet, little spoken until they are gone.
…It is good, he thinks, that they were cast into their rooms. Logic dictates that it was to keep the killer’s identity anonymous, for her lack of boasting requested it. (It would’ve been nice, to have been confirmed, though what else did Valter expect?)
It is good for another purpose though—as a buffer between the Moonstone and the world surrounding, a space for his frustrations to go unseen and without consequence. The time ticks up to the five minute mark; the doors are unlocked.
Just a game—so says the premise, though Valter had blatantly ignored that. Now, he soaks it in—yes, he had lost, but not for real. He had not lost in a way that mattered.
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