#so i can’t get started on anything. sigh
Note
can we get Toji reacting to reader's pregnancy
Pairing: Toji Fushiguro x f!Reader
Warnings: Pure Fluff
Discord +18 - Twitter - Ko-Fi
Ever since finding out that you’re eating for two, you’ve found yourself distressed. Not because this isn’t something that you were planning– Well partially because of that, but mainly because you don’t know what your boyfriend thinks of having more kids. You don’t have the heart to tell him that you’re expecting.
You don’t know how you’ve never had this conversation before, especially since you’ve started to talk about getting married. You know that he has a teenager, and probably he’s done with that part of his life. You also know that you’d be delighted to have kids, but if Toji wouldn’t want to have a child, you’re okay with that too. Your pregnancy changes everything though.
“Aren’t you two here early?” You ask, staring at the front door as Megumi and Toji walk in. Toji has a frown in his face while Megumi walks ahead, not a care in the world. You notice a stain on his school uniform and you tell him, “Put it in the washer, I’ll take care of it, Megs.”
“No, he can deal with the consequences of his actions in his little vacation.” Toji quickly speaks up, making you cock an eyebrow. You look back and forth between Toji and Megumi, hoping someone is going to fill you in. “Go to your room, Megumi. I can’t stand to look at your face anymore.”
“What happened?” You direct your attention to your husband since Megumi listens to his father and goes to his room. Toji sighs, walking over to you and pressing a kiss on your forehead. “Don’t tell me he–”
“Got into a fight. Got called in the middle of work to deal with his ass– Hey, at least he won.” Toji can’t help but chuckle because even though he’s mad, part of him still feels oddly proud. His kid is somewhat of a troublemaker, but hey, at least the kid can fight. He says something that makes the thoughts of worry that you pushed to the back of your mind, come back and even stronger. “Just glad I don’t have to deal with this much longer.”
“Right.” You awkwardly laugh. You follow Toji to your living room, and take a seat beside him on your couch. It’s nothing out of the ordinary, you do this all the time, but Toji immediately knows that something is off. Your face wastes no time in telling on you.
“You okay? You look a little off.” Toji comments, throwing his arm over you and bringing you closer to him. You’re a little far today when you’re usually all over him. The man loves his personal space, but not when it comes to you.
“Weird day… Weird week.” You mutter the last part, but Toji hears it loud and clear. He kisses the top of your head before asking,
“You know you can tell me anything, right?” He proceeds to kiss the top of your head, and you bite down your lip. You have to tell him eventually, and you know that maybe this isn’t the right time to tell him, but he senses something is up.
“What do you think about having kids with me?” You speak a little fast, and if he wasn’t listening closely, he would have to ask you to repeat yourself. Toji takes a moment to think about it, acting perplexed. His silence is killing you and just when you’re about to repeat the question, he speaks up.
“Is this about the pregnancy test I found in the bathroom?” Toji mentions, and your eyes go wide. He’s known? He’s known all this time? He ends up kissing the tip of your nose before pecking your lips, “I’m happy with anything as long as I get to do it with you.”
“What about the comment that you made–” You begin and he interrupts you.
“Was about Megumi, I’m making sure this one isn’t a troublemaker.” Toji clarifies as his hand goes to your lower abdomen. “I’m excited about this. I was wondering how long it’d take you to share.”
“Next time, speak up, I was scaring myself to death.” You lightly slap his chest, and he chuckles. You’re glaring at him, while he smirks at you. “You’re in so much trouble right now. Why didn’t you tell me immediately?”
“Where’s the fun in that?”
#toji x y/n#toji zenin#toji fushiguro x reader#jjk#jujutsu kaisen#jujutsu kaisen x reader#toji fushiguro#daddy toji#fushiguro toji#jujutsu kaisen toji#jujutsu toji#jjk toji#toji x reader#toji x you#dilf toji#toji fushiguro x you#toji fluff#toji imagine#toji fushiguro fluff#fushiguro toji x reader
712 notes
·
View notes
Text
a stoners dream
dealer!chris sturniolo x reader
summary: chris is your new drug dealer, and after a flirty meet up you two decided to take your relationship a step further
warnings: language, fluff, smut, mentions of drugs, oral (male receiving)
you grew up around smokers. you used to hear the stories from you dad and all of his friends about doing crazy stuff when they were young and high. you weren’t unfamiliar with the addictive substance, so when you wanted to try it for the first time they were who you went to.
since moving out you’ve had to take charge and find your own methods to get your fix. you’ve had many different dealers, mostly your friends who buy from a distributor, but it wasn’t until recent that you were put in contact with a stranger. your best friend, kat, had met chris at a party he was dealing at. she knew you were in need of a new dealer, and in need of a hot guy in your life, so she got you his card.
that leads you to where you are now, 2am, mind racing, can’t sleep, and out of weed. not a good mix. your introverted side told you to not reach out. you could’ve just waited until you could buy from a friend, but you were none the less intrigued but this “sexy dealer” kat was telling you about. so you texted him.
y/n-
hey i’m y/n
my friend kat said she met you at a party and gave you my name
i need to buy
almost instantly you got a response.
new dealer-
hey princess
i’m chris
what can i do for you??
you told him what you wanted and 30 minutes later you heard a knock on your apartment door. you opened it to find a man, probably early twenties, in a matching sweat set, and wearing a beanie. your jaw could’ve dropped at the sight and you swore you felt your core start dripping. kat was right when she said he was sexy. you found his hooded eyes, that pulled together his look, taking in your body. you couldn’t help the blush that came over your face. “hey, are you chris?” you asked opening your door farther. “no, i’m just some random fucking guy standing here at three in the morning.” he replied throwing you a wink.
“okay sassy.” you said as you welcomed him into your apartment. taking in his mannerisms, you noticed how he walked and carried himself. there was a confidence around him that wasn’t cocky. it made him even more attractive. he looked around your home for a second before turning to you. it wasn’t until now that you noticed how close the two of you were standing, faces inches apart. staring at eachother, you let out a small sigh.
finally getting a grasp on the situation you asked quietly, “how much do i owe you?” chris looked at you up and down before grabbing the edges of your hoodie pocket to pull you closer to him. your arms reached out instinctively to steady yourself. you hands rested on his chest, not that either of you were complaining. he slipped a small baggie from his pocket to yours in a swift motion. even the smallest touch from him sent shivers down your spine. he pressed his hand to your face and realigned your eyes with his. “it’s on me. think of it as a discount for being a first time customer. a reason for you to come back to me.” he placed a short peck on your cheek before he was out your door. almost no time went by before you received a text.
new dealer-
see you later sweetheart
you let out a shaky breath you didn’t know you were holding, and ran a hand through your hair. you were in trouble.
a week went by before you had to text chris again. you tried to put it off as long as you could, almost hoping you’d find someone else to buy from. to be completely honest, you weren’t sure how long you could control yourself around chris. he was undeniably attractive and after your last little encounter it was going to be hard to keep your hands off of him.
you only heard from him once after he had texted when he left that night. it was a simple conversation, he had just asked if you needed anything. you didn't have it in you to reply. you would have asked him for something that wasn't appropriate for your weed dealer to give you. tonight you really did need your fix though.
y/n-
hey you able to bring me an ounce tonight?
hot dealer chris-
gotcha baby
baby. he called you baby. he's called you a few nicknames in the short time you've known him, but this one hit different. this one made your stomach flutter with butterflies. there was no explanation to why you felt this way. it was just chris. he's just selling you weed. that's it.
a knock sounded before you heard your door open. "oh so you're just letting yourself in now. what if i wasn't here? what if i wasn't dressed?" you said with a laugh. you really didn't care, you just wanted to give him a hard time. "you being undressed gives me way more of a reason to let myself in. fuck outta here," chris's blue eyes brightened under the lights in your kitchen. "i got your stuff for you, ma."
he followed you through your apartment as you went to grab your wallet. "how much do i owe you." chris gave you a 'really' look. "what?" you asked confused. "who said you're paying me? i didn't say that." you were really confused now. you didn't understand why he wouldn't let you give him money.
"why can't i pay you?" you said making your way over to him. standing in front of him, you slowly ran your arms up his chest to wrap around his neck. you don't know what had gotten into you, you felt a burst of confidence. maybe it was the bit of weed coursing through your body. maybe it was just chris's presence. you weren't sure.
you felt chris's hands on your waist pulling you closer, if that was even possible. his head leaned down, and you could feel his breath fan across your face. "i can think of a couple ways for you to pay me, baby. none of them include your money though." chris whispered. his lips faintly brushed across yours. you could assume it was an accident, but you didn't want to. "you're too pretty to pay for weed." he said.
"chris. you can't just give me this for free." "yes i can. i make my own fucking rules." at this point you couldn't argue with his logic. especially not when his lips were placing soft kisses to your neck. you almost let out a soft moan when his hand snaked up to grip the side of your throat. you quickly got enough self control to step away from the situation at hand.
you swore you could've cum at the sight in front of you. chris stood there with blown out pupils and a white muscle tee. you didn't have to look very hard to see the outline of his dick in his sweatpants. it was impressive how he could make you feel this way without even knowing it. "please let me give you something." you said after completing your staring. chris walked back over to you, he stopped his leaning to see any amount of hesitation in your eyes. the slight nod of your head was all he needed to finally connect your lips.
you don't know how long you stood there. your mouth's fighting for dominance as you both ran your hands over each other, savoring the feeling of the others body. chris's hands reached down to palm your ass as yours played with the waistband of his pants. you reached down to teasingly palm his growing erection. he let out a soft groan, finally disconnecting your mouths, you caught your breath before lowering to your knees in front of chris. "are you sure?" he asked as he softly brushed your hair out of your face. you looked at him through your eyelashes and gave him an almost devious smile.
you gestured for him to take his shirt off before kissing your way down his torso. paying extra attention to his v line slowing your pace to tease him. his eyes rolled back slightly as he watched you use your teeth to untie his pants. "you really want this?" you asked knowing the answer but trying to prolong the process.
chris nodded aggressively. he took the back of your head in his hand and pushed your face into his erection. you decided to stop teasing him and you slowly pulled down his pants and boxers in a skilled motion. his dick sprung out hitting him in the stomach. he grabbed it before you could and pumped it quickly. you took chris's hand in your own before spitting on his tip and using your free hand to spread you saliva on his length.
you never thought chris would be the vocal type, but every sound from him was encouragement to keep going. chris took his hand out of yours and pulled your hair into a makeshift ponytail. you hastily took his cock in your mouth and caught him by surprise when you slammed him to the back of your throat. chris let out a loud moan while you kept his member still for a second.
his stuttered breath quickened when when you took him out of your mouth and licked from the base of his cock to the tip. "god. you- fuck." chris couldn't make out a full sentence causing you to try to giggle at him, a task proving to be challenging with his cock down your throat. his hips started to gently rock into you. you pulled your mouth off with a pop and looked up at him. "use me." you said. chris quickly pulled himself together just enough to understand what you were saying.
chris gave you a look of denial as you braced yourself by placing your hands on his thighs. you looked up at him as you opened your mouth widely. chris caught on to what you wanted and took no time to thrust himself into your lips. his hands gripped your hair as you felt tears well in your eyes from the sensation of his cock hitting the back of your throat. "fuck baby just like that," his eyes rolled to the back of his head and his balance faltered ever so slightly. "i'm not going to last much longer."
you took control back by stopping his movements and returning to your original method of bobbing your head and using one of your hands to cup his balls. his breathing picked up and his groans got louder soon after. you felt him twitch in your mouth before letting his ropes of cum fall down your throat. you took all of him, using your tongue to clean up every drop he gave you. you pulled your mouth off of him and used the heal of your palm to wipe your eyes,
chris slowly recovered from his fucked out state. making your way off the floor you saw chris start to pull up his boxers and sweatpants. you made your way to your bedroom door before calling out behind you to him. "come smoke with me when you're done." he let out a low laugh before watching you leave the room completely.
taglist:
@norr1ssturni0lo @recklessmatt @luvr4miya @hpyjw @unbruisable @watercolorskyy @elliewrites1 @rheaasturn @slxt4matt @mmay4ever @aurizp @mattslolita
#nick sturniolo#chris sturniolo#matt sturniolo x reader#matt sturniolo#chris sturniolo x reader#matt sturniolo fluff#matt sturniolo smut#chris sturniolo smut#sturniolo fanfic#matt sturniolo imagine#chrissturniolofanfic#chris sturniolo fluff#chrissturniolo#sturniolos#sturniolo#matthew sturniolo#sturniolo triplets#sturniolo triplets smut#sturniolo x reader
183 notes
·
View notes
Text
@jegulus-microfic // may 22 // prompt: control // words: 1169
“We should eat soon. Do you have any preference?” James asks as he glances into his rearview mirror.
“No, I'm easy,” Regulus replies. He swipes at his phone again, mindlessly opening the calculator before closing it again. He's been alternating between the calculator and the weather app for the better part of an hour no, nothing else to do on his phone and a deep reluctance to have an actual conversation with James.
He looks up at James when there’s no response. It takes a second for his own words to register and with a sigh he adds, “I meant easy to please.”
Again, the double meaning snatches James’ attention. “I'm just not picky,” Regulus grounds out.
“Yeah,” James scoffs. “I can tell.”
Regulus drops his phone on his lap, turning his head to give James his full attention. “What’s that supposed to mean?”
“Nothing.” But evidently it is not nothing, because James waits barely a second before continuing with, “It’s just that you barely waited for the bed to get cold.”
“Excuse me?” Incredulity bleeds into his voice.
“I heard that you went out a lot.”
“With my friends.” Late nights wallowing on the couch were only accepted for so long until they started tugging at him with impatient hands, dragging him out of the house and into this club, then that one.
They told him that the best way to get over someone was to get under someone else, but Regulus never did take anyone home. Any pair of hands that didn't belong to James made his skin crawl.
“And we all know how your friends feel about you,” James says harshly.
“Okay, seriously, what the fuck is your damage, James?” Regulus twists in his seat, staring holes into James’ side profile. His messy hair and wire-frame glasses. His cheeks are flushed with anger, but Regulus doesn’t think James has anything to be angry about.
“What's my damage?” James asks, eyes flitting over to Regulus. “What are you, twelve?”
“You know what I mean.”
“Do I?”
Regulus laughs, short and joyless, before dropping back into his seat. His eyes fall shut as he lets his head thud against the headrest. “And I remember, suddenly, why this didn’t work.”
“Yeah? Was it your incessant need to be in control?”
“No, actually. It was your complete and utter inability to listen.”
“Oh, I think I hear you loud and clear,” James scoffs, and Regulus resists the urge to just crawl out the car window. He’s slight enough, he thinks he could fit. As a matter of fact —
“Stop the car.”
“What?”
“You heard me, stop the fucking car.”
“Regulus, you're not walking all the way to Sirius' house. We still have three hours to go.”
“I don't care. Stop. The. Car.”
“What's your damage?”
“My damage is that I'm stuck in a car with you with nowhere else to go!”
It's silent for a beat. Then two.
“Well, I'm sorry you feel that way,” James says eventually, before harshly turning the dial to turn up the volume.
They drive to the roadside restaurant in silence. Or well, as silent as can be with the music playing loud enough that Regulus can’t hear himself think. Just as well. He wasn’t thinking anything nice.
James makes the executive decision to pass by a drive-through, probably to prevent having to spend more time in each other’s company than strictly necessary. Regulus can’t say that he minds.
No words are exchanged as they eat, but when Regulus reaches for his drink in the cupholder, James speaks again.
“Do you still like vanilla milkshakes?” He inclines his head toward the cup in Regulus’ hand. James always teased him about choosing the most boring flavor, but vanilla is a classic and Regulus stands by it.
Regulus has the urge to make a snide comment, but he swallows it down. Glances over at James, tense in his seat, both hands on the steering wheel. It unnerves Regulus a little, seeing James like this. He is supposed to be loose limbs and easy smiles. Not… this.
“Yeah, do— do you still like those cherries?” Regulus asks, holding out his cup for James in case he wants the maraschino cherry that sits on top of the whipped cream. James plucks it out of the swirl with ease, like they never stopped doing this.
“Do you still go to the diner down the street?”
They used to go often. The 24/7 diner, red and white tiles on the walls, cracked leather in the booths. They spent late nights there, when studying took priority over cooking and everything else was closed. Appearing again on a Saturday morning, soaking up the alcohol that still lingered in their systems. Salty and sweet kisses shared next to the jukebox.
“No, it—” Regulus catches himself before he says something embarrassing like it hasn’t been the same without you. “It’s been a while,” he says instead.
“I see.”
Regulus squeezes his eyes shut, black spots swimming in his vision. Then, before he can chicken out, he asks the first thing that comes to mind.
“Does your mom still collect those novelty plates?”
James laughs at that, the sound of it comforting and familiar, and he seems to relax in his seat. Even if just a little.
“She’s actually moved on to novelty shot glasses. My dad had to get rid of five plates he’d bought in advance. I still have them, though. I just know she’ll return to the plate thing soon enough.”
They pass the time like that, dragging up memories and habits, questions flowing between them. Regulus finds that he likes it. He’d missed James’ easy nature, his way of telling stories. He also finds that he is secretly relieved that James hasn’t changed a lot in the time they spent away from each other.
Do you still? Say yes, say yes.
Do you still forget to clean your glasses? Do you still keep a picture of you dad in your wallet? Do you still like your coffee the same way? Do you still—
Say yes, say yes.
“I got the internship, by the way,” Regulus says at some point. He’s not sure how much time has passed, but stretching fields of green are slowly giving way to houses again. “The—”
“—one at the publishing house?” James cuts in excitedly. His head whips to the side to look at Regulus, joy evident in the little crinkles around his eyes. “No way!”
Regulus’ heart stalls and stutters. A heavy beat in his chest. Say yes, say yes.
“I can’t believe you remember that,” he breathes.
Silence stretches between them and for a moment, Regulus thinks the conversation has died down again. It was nice while it lasted.
But then, so soft like he hoped Regulus might not hear, “I remember everything about you.”
Do you still? Say yes, say yes.
“James. Stop the car.”
“What?”
“Stop the car.”
Say yes, say yes.
Thankfully, James doesn’t need to be told a third time.
#exes jegulus! brought to you by the fact that i wanted them to say “what’s your damage”#not to be confused with the messy exes jegulus microfics#which is a different universe#sorry for the car setting#it’s the talking on the ride home effect#anyways do you think they got arrested for public indecency?#feeling kinda tempted to write a part two where they mess up the backseat#but we'll have to see if the smut fairy visits me#do you guys remember when i wrote a whole pwp? i can't believe i did that#anyways!! tags!!#regulus black#james potter#jegulus#starchaser#jegulus microfic#mil's microfics#mil's writing
179 notes
·
View notes
Note
hi hiii its my first time ever asking anyone idk how this works ( ;｀Д´)
i rlly love your writing, i often find myself staying up late reading through your blogs!! funny bcs u were the one who got me into jason todd (ФωФ)
anyways!!! i was hoping you could pls pls pls pls plssssss write smth about Jason Todd who has a lover thats a sleep-deprived uni student having a hell week and jason is like "bitch put google docs down and get some sleep, ur ass has been awake for 48 hours" all worried and wanting them to rest and reader is like "correction, 50 hours."
i hope it makes sense (´ 3｀)
tyyyyy!!! woopee woopee
Sorry this took so long to get to anon, I hope you liked it either way. And don’t stay up too late reading fics but I truly appreciate you reading my stuff, I’m glad you like them 🦦🐿️
A week.
An entire week Jason had noticed you have been forcing yourself to stay up at the dead of night, glued to your laptop all the while chugging energy drinks and cups of coffee as though they were going out of style, and for what? An assignment that determined your future at uni should you not get straight marks.
Jason thought it ridiculous that you made yourself sleep deprived over this but he knew that if he didn’t do anything about it, then you’ll continue this habit until you were well out of university, struggling to come to terms that you had well and truly burnt yourself out before you could properly start living.
So when Jason couldn’t fell you next to him in bed one night, like you promised him you would, and groaned as he got himself out of bed before making his way towards the kitchen where he’d knew you’d be.
‘What time do you call this?’ Jason asked when he saw you in your usual spot at the kitchen counter, hunched over your laptop with a thin blanket frapped over your shoulders and a can of energy drink on one side of the laptop and a cup of coffee on the other side. He hated what this stupid university has made you do just in order to get good grades, it was harmful, damaging and it would inevitably lead to health complications later on in life; If he could Jason would more then gladly march down there and threaten the professors to stop shoving a boatload of work onto their students, but firstly he has to get you away from that damn laptop and learn how to take a fucking break.
‘Mid-afternoon?’ You asked, not looking up from the bright screen of your laptop, where the words scrawled across it in an incoherent mess for your overworked brain to comprehend.
‘It’s actually 3:30 in the morning.’ Jason replied unamused as he crossed his arms over his chest and you winced when you saw that he was indeed right about it being three thirty in the morning. ‘Don’t you think it’s time that you shut the laptop off and get some sleep?’
‘But I-‘
‘Actually sleep.’ Jason cuts you off as you slumped back into your chair, unable to come up with a decent enough response to defend yourself with because deep down you knew Jason was right, you’ve hadn’t had a decent sleep in a long while and it was definitely taking it’s toll with how lightheaded you’ve become as of late.
You sighed and ran your hands down your face. ‘Jason I can’t, I’ve got-‘
‘An assignment to complete for tomorrow I know.’ Jason cuts you off again as he crossed the room to put his hand over the top of your coffee cup upon noticing that you were intending to take another drink from it. ‘But I look at you and can tell you can barely keep your eyes open for more than five minutes.’ He adds and upon your silence, he puts the cup aside as far as he could before doing the same with the half empty energy drink, and then finally shutting the laptop close despite your weak protests for him not to.
‘No, Jason my assignment, I need to finish it.’ You told him with slow, sluggish movements as you tried to pry his hand off of your laptop, all the while biting back a yawn. ‘Just give me five more minutes please and I’ll come to bed, promise.’
Jason had enough of this habit of sleepless nights, it ends now, the professors will have to understand and extend the due date for your sake as he remembered how often you had harped on about how important this assignment was for your overall grade; However Jason didn’t take neglecting your bodily needs lightly and would prioritise that over anything else,you could hate him all you wanted but he was only looking out for you and your wellbeing.
‘Sorry chipmunk but I can’t watch you do this to yourself for any longer than I already have.’ Was all Jason said as he then lifted you out of your chair suddenly causing you to yelp in surprise and cling onto him for dear life, now being more awake then you ever have been five minutes ago, as he then proceeded to carry you back towards the bedroom before unceremoniously dropping you onto the bed.
‘Jason, I seriously needed to get that assignment-‘
‘We are going to sleep, end of discussion.’ Jason said with finality as he crawled under the covers and quickly held you against his chest as tightly as he could, rubbing his hands up and down your back soothingly. ‘I know how important this assignment was for you sweetheart but I’d much rather have you well rested, clear minded and healthy than to ever to have you pass out in my arms from exhaustion. I want my baby happy and healthy and you are neither of those things right now.’ Jason whispers into your ear, kissing the side of your head a couple of times before resting his forehead against yours so that he was looking into your weary half lidded eyes.
‘Look at you, you can barely keep your eyes open.’ He spoke with worry laced in his words.
‘You’re really warm and comfy jay birdie.’ You murmured, feeling the need for sleep grow ever stronger the longer you stayed in his arms as it fogged your mind.
‘I know, so please we can talk to the professor in the morning and sort something out, but until then no more late nights understand?’ Jason said firmly as he held you a little tighter, he just wanted you to get a decent nights sleep and be looked after properly but all these late nights weren’t cutting it and were making your situation worse, how were you meant to get anything done when you were half out of it due to overworking and lack of a sleep schedule? Were the professors at your university thinking they were teaching robots instead of humans with breaking limits?
‘Okay I understand, I love you.’ You replied sleepily as you burrowed your head into his neck, falling asleep in record time as Jason stayed awake a little longer as to make sure you were properly asleep before following suit, watching over you in the dream realm as he did the waking one.
#dc imagine#dc x reader#dc x you#dc fanfic#dc fic#dc comics x reader#dc x y/n#dc fanfiction#jason todd imagine#jason todd fluff#jason todd x reader#jason todd imagines#red hood x you#red hood imagine#red hood x reader#red hood imagines
208 notes
·
View notes
Note
babe you’ve got me obsessed with doctor remus!
can i request a drabble where reader gets into like a car accident and has been taken into a&e with like mid/severe injuries and remus has been assigned to treat her?
if not then that’s fine! love your work bae 🎀
Hi gorgeous! Thank you for requesting (I'm obsessed with him too) :)
cw: hospital
doctor!Remus x fem!reader ♡ 716 words
The nurse leaves, and you think you might finally get more than five seconds to yourself but then the curtain pulls back again, a tall doctor taking her place. You’ve been able to feel your heartbeat pulsing through every inch of you since you’d stumbled out of your smoking car, and this new man doesn’t help matters.
He’s lovely. With a face smattered with warm freckles and silvery scars and a mop of brown hair that looks like it’s never once been brushed, this is the kind of person who would fluster you on a normal day. Now, you don’t even know the word to describe the effect he has on you.
He has to ask his question a second time before you hear it.
“Have you had allergic reactions to any medications?”
You blink. It still feels like reality is moving at twice its usual speed. You don’t know if it’s just you shaking, but it feels like the whole room. “Uh, no. Sorry.”
“That’s alright.” The doctor’s voice is businesslike but kind, with a Welsh lilt. He flips a page on his clipboard. “Anything we weren’t able to address in the ambulance? Any new aches and pains?”
“I—I don’t think so.”
He lowers the clipboard slightly, looking at you. His eyes are a lightish brown color, like honey left too long in the sun. “Has anyone talked you through grounding exercises?”
You feel your brow wrinkle. “What?”
He almost smiles. “I’ll take that for a no.” He sets down his clipboard on the edge of your bed, pulling up a rolling chair and sitting down in front of you. “I’m going to have you breathe with me for a minute, alright, sweetheart?”
It’s not in your nature to contradict professionals, but you feel your head shaking as if from somewhere outside of yourself. “Why?” you ask. “Aren’t there more important things?”
“There are still things left to do,” he allows, seeming unaffected by your questioning, “but you’re stable. It’s nothing that can’t wait for a few minutes, and it’s important that you’re calm so you can think properly.” He takes your hands in his, ignoring the odd padding of the splint around your broken wrist and holding your fingertips instead. “All I need from you is for you to copy my breathing. Can you do that for me?”
You nod. As he starts to talk you through it, your eyes begin to sting, an effect of his gentle tone or the respite your body has been craving or both. Your doctor’s expression doesn’t change when he sees the silver lining your eyes, but he gives your fingertips a light squeeze.
“Okay, in for eight this time,” he says in that lulling voice. “Good job, just keep at it.”
You manage to breathe in for long enough to satisfy him, and after the exhale he drops your hands.
“Well done,” he murmurs, mindful of the small cuts on your face as he thumbs away your tears. “Are you feeling a bit better?”
“Yeah,” you answer honestly. The word comes out like a sigh, and his lip curves softly at the plain relief in the sound.
“Happy to hear it. You were right earlier, there’s still plenty left to do,” he says, expression sombering somewhat as he looks at you intently, “but if you ever need a break, you tell me or someone else, okay? I don’t want you suffering in silence.”
“Okay.” You wet your lips, feeling much more solid than you had a few minutes before. The world has slowed to its regular speed. “Sorry, I don’t think I got your name.”
He smiles, which is altogether too charming for a place like this. It makes the long scar going across his cheek crinkle slightly and you could swear his eyes lighten a shade. “Well, see, that’s how I know you weren’t really with me when you came in, because we’ve already been introduced.” His expression lets you know he hasn’t taken any offense, but your face still heats at your impoliteness. “It’s Doctor Lupin, but you can call me Remus.”
Something in you rings at this new knowledge, like a tuning fork has been struck. Remus, your consciousness echoes quietly.
His smile softens. “We’ll probably be seeing a lot of each other today.”
#doctor!remus lupin#doctor!remus x reader#remus lupin au#remus lupin#remus lupin x reader#remus lupin x fem!reader#remus lupin x y/n#remus lupin x you#remus lupin x self insert#remus lupin fanfiction#remus lupin fanfic#remus lupin fic#remus lupin hurt/comfort#remus lupin imagine#remus lupin scenario#remus lupin drabble#remus lupin blurb#remus lupin one shot#remus lupin oneshot#marauders#marauders fanfiction#marauders fandom#the marauders#hp marauders#marauders au#marauders x reader
299 notes
·
View notes
Note
Werewolf husband who gets you pregnant with your first liter and is the sweetest but he can’t help how good you look! Please he knows you’re tired but he just wants a taste! He’ll do anything you want after please just let him in-between your legs
it starts off innocent, just a massage for his lovely mate, he insists you sit down and rest while he does his best to pamper you. you've done so much just by being pregnant all day, let him take care of you.
He rubs your feet while listening to you talk about your day and slowly his clawed hands move up, rubbing your calf and slowly working up to your thigh. He's trying to focus on your words but every time he moves his hands up your breath catches and you stumble over your words. You're so cute, so easily flustered and those cute surprised noises you keep making aren't helping.
He strokes your inner thigh carefully, the image of his hand disappearing under your skirt is enough to make you squirm on your own even if he isn't touching you anywhere inappropriate yet.
"Sounds like you've had a hard day," he purrs in a low voice. his eyes are deep and piercing. wanting. You suddenly feel very small, like a hunted animal countered by the big bad wolf.
"I- guess," you say. he looms over you, pulling your legs apart,
"let me make it a little better," he purrs before reaching down to tug your underwear off.
"Baby I'm tired," you groan, thinking about the rough sex that your werewolf husband loved, you loved it too but you didn't think you could physically take it.
"I'll be gentle, make you feel good, a nice orgasm will make you nice and sleepy then I'll carry you to bed," he promises, already licking his lips. he's desperate to taste you, to pleasure you, he's practically drooling. it's kind of a turn-on. He's already kissing your thigh, his hands roaming your body, rubbing over your pregnant belly up to palm your swollen tits.
"Okay, okay," you sigh, leaning back and spreading your legs for him to bury his face in your cunt. He's slow, and passionate as he slowly runs his tongue over your folds, tasting you before pushing his thick tongue inside of you making you shudder. he's never been this patient when eating you out, usually, he's rushed and sloppy, spitting on your pussy to get you wet before shoving his fingers in your pussy to get you stretched for his big cock.
This isn't that. this is a make-out session with your pussy, this is eating you out for the sake of eating you out. You let yourself relax, slowly grinding against his face as he snarls and laps at your folds tension builds in your body, every moan you let past your lips only spurred him on to keep going. you shudder as you cum, his lips wrapped around your clit, you can feel him grinning to himself as you whimper and ride out your orgasm.
"thank you," he purrs, scooping you up in his arms to take you to bed, just as he promised.
#monster imagine#monster fucker#monster#monster boyfriend#teratophillia#werewolf x reader#werewolf#werewolves#werewolf boyfriend
320 notes
·
View notes
Text
I Wanna Be Yours
pt 1
wc: 1.6k
warnings: douchey bf, mentions of sex, clubbing, alcohol, cheating (only a little)
pairings: nika muhl x fem!reader
ok guys i’m doing a series!! this is partially why i closed my requests, so if this does bad i might cry. idk how many parts it’s gonna be but here’s part 1, enjoy :)
You laid back with a sigh and watched your boyfriend get up. He immediately pulled out his phone and called his friend.
“Yeah. Yeah man, I’ll be there soon.” He hung up and turned to you. You were sweaty, tired, and uncomfortable; he couldn’t get you to cum to save his life. “Ima hang out with the boys babe.”
You frowned. “You’re leaving already? You just.. you just got here.”
He shrugged and threw a shirt on. “Yeah, but we already fucked.”
There it was again. Your boyfriend, the guy who supposedly was in love with you, taking part in his usual after sex ritual. You’d go to either of your places, fuck, and he’d either leave completely or pay no mind to you after.
It felt like a casual hookup, and it made you feel awful.
“Plus, I’m taking you out tomorrow night. Isn’t that enough?” He hoisted his shorts back onto his waist and fixed his hair in the mirror.
“I guess.” You sighed.
He walked towards the bedroom door. “Love you babe.”
You watched him leave without saying anything in return. Your eyes shut and you took a deep breath. It wasn’t unusual for him to act this way, hell it was the only way you knew he acted, but it still hurt every time.
Your friend slung her arm around your shoulder as you left class. “Yeah, then he just left.” You finished explaining yesterdays events to her.
“Girl, you’ve gotta dump his ass.” She shook her head in disbelief. “Come out with me and the girls tonight, we can go to a club and find you someone new.”
“I can’t, Ryan planned a date night today. Some sort of dinner thing.” You shrugged. “Maybe another time.”
She gave you a knowing look. “Fine, just call if you need anything, or if you change your mind.” She smirked before walking away.
You touched up your makeup and hair in the mirror. The black bodycon dress you wore made you look incredible. He had told you earlier to dress nice, so you found the nicest thing in your closet and threw it on.
Ryan was coming from one of his friends apartments, so you had to meet him at the restaurant.
You pulled up outside of the place and found a parking spot. It looked nice on the outside, pretty yellow lights hanging around the outdoor seating, surprisingly beautiful architecture considering it’s a restaurant.
It was nice, and you knew this was Ryan trying to make up for everything. You headed inside and a hosted led you to the table that he reserved for the two of you.
Once you sat down and ordered a water, you checked the time. He was running a few minutes late, which was normal.
A little more time had passed. A waitress had come to ask if you wanted to order, and you shook your head and said to wait a few more minutes.
Well, those few minutes passed and there was still no sign of your boyfriend showing up. You pulled out your phone and called him.
No answer.
You called him again, no answer.
You sent a few texts asking where he was, if he was okay, and if he’d be there soon.
A few minutes later you checked your phone and there was still no answer. The waitress had come back to the table and she noticed the tears welling in your eyes. “Listen, I know you’re waiting for someone miss, but I’d hate to see you wait here all night for them.”
You took a deep breath and nodded. “I’ll- Ill be leaving now, thank you.” You gave her a polite smile and gathered your purse and jacket before leaving the restaurant.
The second you got into the car the tears started flowing. In the end, you weren’t surprised this happened. He was a shit boyfriend and always ended up making you feel this way.
You pulled out your phone and dialed a number. “Hello?” The voice rang out over the loud sound of music behind it.
“What club are you at?” You spoke through tears.
“Oh, sweetie.” You friend frowned and you could hear it through her voice. “The usual. He didn’t show up?”
“Don’t wanna talk about it. Be there in 15.” You hung up and immediately started driving to the club.
You’d been on the road for 10 minutes and there was still no answer from Ryan. The second you parked you checked his location, and it showed that he was still at his friends house.
You quickly got it off your screen and rushed into the club, trying hard to find your friends. You also were trying hard to not let the tears in your eyes fall, but it was proving to be difficult.
Once you finally spotted them, you made a beeline towards the back of the club. Except you didn’t make it very far. You ran straight into a tall figure.
“Fuck, I’m so sorry.” The figure turned around and a brunette stared down at you.
She must’ve seen your shaken state and shook her head softly. “No worries.” She paused. “Are you okay?”
You blinked a few times and your eyes met hers. They were soft and brown and you felt yourself immediately being pulled in.
“Hello?” She waved her hand gently in front of your face.
“Oh, yeah, sorry. I’m- I’m okay.” You smiled a bit at her.
She smiled back and nodded. “I’m Nika, by the way.”
The second you heard her name it clicked in your head who you were talking to. Your eyes widened a bit. You were new to the UConn scene, only arriving as a transfer at the beginning of the year, but of course you had heard about Nika Muhl.
“I- I know.” You shook your head immediately. “I mean, I’ve seen you. Fuck- I’ve seen your games.” You let out a long breath and looked away from her. “Sorry, I’m a mess right now.”
She couldn’t help but smile at your nerves. She thought it was adorable. Nika laughed softly. “I’ve never seen you around before, y’know.”
“I transferred from Boston College this year.” You met her eyes again and realized her gaze hadn’t left you.
She nodded. “Why don’t I get you a drink, then you can tell me more?”
A small smile twitched at your lips. “Deal.”
The rest of the night went smoothly. You and Nika talked, and both of your groups of friends had been long forgotten.
Everything was going great until she asked about the one thing you hoped she wouldn’t. “So.. d’you have a boyfriend or anything?”
You froze for a second and took a deep breath. “I, uh, yeah. Yeah, I do.”
She nodded and took a sip of her drink to mask her disappointment, but she didn’t miss the tone of your voice when you answered.
“He’s.. awful though. I’m only here because he forgot about our date night.” You took a sip of your drink after that.
She scoffed. “What a dick.” She couldn’t believe that anyone could treat a girl like you that way. Nika had only known you for less than a few hours but she knew you were special, and deserved to be treated as such.
You shrugged and looked down at your lap. You fidgeted with the promise ring on your finger, only feeling more hurt by looking at it.
She watched you for a moment before standing up and pulled your hands out of your lap. “C’mon, let’s go dance. Forget about him.”
“Oh, no I-“ You shook your head. “I’m not a dancer.”
“Neither am I, but have some fun, yeah?”
You sighed and got up, letting her lead you to where everyone was huddled together and dancing. You stood there awkwardly for a moment before Nika started swaying, moving your arms around.
You couldn’t help but smile at her, and she smiled back. You started swaying on your own, dancing along to the music blaring from the overhead speakers.
More people joined their friends on the dance floor and it started feeling like a can of sardines. At this point, you were practically pressed against Nika.
The heat radiating off her body could be felt a mile away. You shouldn’t have been doing this with her, you had a boyfriend, but she was so beautiful and kind, you couldn’t help yourself.
Her hands found your waist and you let her rest them there. How could something so incredibly wrong feel so good?
Nika’s brown eyes stared down at you as you danced against her. Her gaze flickered lower, landing on your lips. She couldn’t help herself. She leaned in and kissed you feverishly.
You melted against her, letting the kiss consume you whole. But then Ryan’s face popped into your head. You were out, kissing a girl in a club, while Ryan was probably at his friends house asleep. He had no idea, and even though he was awful, you couldn’t do this to him.
You pulled away from her and took a step back. “I- I can’t do this, Nika. I have a boyfriend-“
“Yeah, but he’s a douche, and you deserve better.” She cut you off.
You shook your head. “But this.. this is wrong. I’m sorry.” You quickly pushed your way out of the crowd of people and through the exit of the club. You reached your car and let out a deep breath.
You ran a hand over your face and blinked a few times. “What the fuck did I just do?”
224 notes
·
View notes
Note
may i request a mai tai 💛 with nicojack
26 (and 25 if you combine prompts, not sure though!)
thank you for requesting!🫶🏽put this in the frat!universe because i thought you requested it but oh well!!🤠
26. kissing the top of their head
.
Neither you nor Jack could be blamed when it was clearly Nico’s fault for conditioning you both.
In all honesty, none of you really noticed what he was doing until he stopped. And then suddenly, your world was disjointed and the planets weren’t aligning and the world was tilting on its axis. Something so small and yet so monumental that it was disconcerting when it never happened.
Because you were so damn used to Nico kissing the top of your heads as a small but heartwarming gesture.
It was funny, really. The man had done more than enough to make butterflies erupt in your stomach, to make your cheeks burn and your brain to melt until no coherent thoughts were left. He said filthy things in your ear and bent you into positions that had you seeing stars. He had made you feel a million emotions and more.
But nothing made you feel more loved than the way his hand caressed the back of your head, holding you in place as his lips pressed a loving, lingering kiss on the top of your head. And you knew Jack agreed because you had seen the way his face broke out into a grin after Nico kissed his head—and you knew your face matched his expression.
That’s why it threw you both off when Nico left one morning for class without kissing either one of you on the head.
You had no classes and Jack’s were later in the afternoon so the two of you were lounging in his room, no real rush to start your day. But Nico was running late, in a bit of a rush as he shoved books into his bag and called out a quick ‘love you!’ before he rushed off.
You didn’t realise how offended you would be until it happened.
And you thought you were being dramatic until you turned to look at Jack and found him frowning, a crease formed between his brows as he stared at the door Nico just ran out off. So, if anything, you weren’t being a brat. Or being dramatic. Or silly or theatrical or whatever else the other frat brothers had said.
You and Jack were being so fair about your reactions, especially when Nico came back from classes and didn’t even try to rectify his mistakes. And especially when it happened a few more times over the next week.
“I don’t understand what’s happened,” Nico tried again as he stared a bit helplessly at you. He had tried to convince Jack to take a nap with him after his class, only for the younger boy to mutter something about studying and needing to go grab some books from Trevor.
“I don’t know what you’re talking about,” you answered simply, your eyes on your laptop instead of the way Nico was sitting on the bed, shorts riding up his thick thighs with his legs spread as far as they were.
He shot you a look. “So you’re doing this as well?”
“Doing what?” You questioned innocently, even if your eyes have read over the same sentence more times than you cared to admit because your boyfriend was distracting in those tiny shorts and the small frown on his face.
Nico hummed and, naively, you thought he had let it go. But then you heard him getting up and his footsteps making his way towards you. And you barely had a chance to react before your chair was being spun around and Nico’s arms were locking you in as he leaned over you.
“I–”
“Tell me what’s bothering you both.”
You let out a stubborn sigh. “Nothing.”
“Baby, I can’t help if I don’t know what’s wrong,” Nico said, his voice soft but firm and, fuck, you knew what he was doing. That sweet, coaxing voice he used in bed too when he wanted you to do what he asked, when he had you whining and panting and promised you he would give you what you wanted if you were a little patient.
The fucker knew what he was doing with that voice.
“C’mon,” he murmured, his accent coating his words to make them that little bit sweeter. “Use your words.”
“You forgot,” you blurted out.
Nico blinked. “I…forgot?”
“You—” You paused, feeling your cheeks burn a little because, okay, maybe you and Jack were being a little dramatic about the whole thing. And it was only really hitting you when you had to confess it out loud. “You don’t kiss us anymore.”
Nico blinked again. “Uh, I do, baby. I kiss you and Jack all the time.”
“Yeah, on the lips but—” You glanced away from him and the contemplative look on his face. “You don’t give us forehead kisses anymore. You used to do it all the time and, I don’t know, you just…forget now.”
It was silent for a while before you finally gained the courage to look at him, just to find Nico staring at you with a smile on his face and a soft look of adoration in his eyes.
“I didn’t realise you two enjoyed them so much,” he confessed, because for him, it was something instinctive. He just did it because it felt right, not because he thought about it. And something in his chest warmed at the idea that you and Jack craved the affection of it so much.
“Yeah, well…” You trailed off, shrugging your shoulders when words failed to leave your lips.
“Hmm, m’sorry for neglecting you both then,” Nico murmured and before you could even say anything, you felt both of his hands cupping your face before his head dropped to place a lingering kiss to the crown of your head. “Better?”
“You have a few to make up for,” you retorted and his grin widened.
However, before Nico could get his retort out, the door opened and Jack wandered back into the room, holding a comically large pile of books (some of which didn’t even belong to classes he took). You snorted at the sight, knowing very well he was making a point as he made his way to the desk to sit beside you.
“Jack,” Nico called out, biting back the smirk on his lips when he watched the younger boy try to act indifferent.
“Oh, you remember me now?” Jack muttered, keeping his eyes on the books because he knew he would crumble the second he turned to look at his boyfriend.
“C’mere.”
“I’m actually great where I am—hey!”
But his whining was cut off when, similarly to you, Nico held his head in his hands and used the height difference between them to press a lingering kiss to the top of his messy hair. And when he pulled back, he beamed at the sight of Jack blushing.
“Talk to me next time, okay?”
“Mhm.”
“Instead of being a brat.”
Jack scoffed. “I was not being a brat.”
“Yeah, you were,” Nico retorted but he sounded fond as he pressed another kiss to his boyfriend’s head. “You both were but, fortunately, I love you both for it.”
.
#cece's cocktail celebration#nicojack#nico hischier#jack hughes#nhl#new jersey devils#nico hischier x reader#nico hischier x you#nico hischier x y/n#nico hischier fic#nico hischier one shot#jack hughes x reader#jack hughes x you#jack hughes x y/n#jack hughes fic#jack hughes one shot#nhl x reader#nhl x you#nhl x y/n#nhl fic#nhl one shot
152 notes
·
View notes
Text
Genshin SAGAU, Creator of Teyvat, but not Humanity Part 7
WOwza, this one took a while!
Thank you so much to everyone who liked and commented, literally makes my day whenever you read them. I love them so much!
Sorry not sorry for the cliffhanger last time ;) In return you guys get this massive chapter. It's the biggest so far I think.
Warning for mild dissociative thoughts
Warning for Spoilers up to 4.6
Masterlist | Prev Part
~~~
Funny thing about the brain is that it actually helps you filter out a lot of sensations.
For example, you can always see your nose. Always, but you don’t notice it because your brain filters it out.
Or the fact that your toes are always touching each other, you can always feel your toes.
It’s actually really important that the brain does all this, because if it didn’t you probably wouldn’t be able to get stuff done.
You’d just lay there.
Like a potato, unable to do anything because you’re too busy feeling.
Do you know why I know that?
It’s because I’m feeling it, right now.
Every inch of my body, I can feel.
The gentlest of breezes, the slightest brush of fabric, the pounding of the heart, the light touches of my eyelashes hitting my face.
I just laid there, breathing.
Feeling the air going in and out of my body.
You’re not sure where you are.
Or why you’re here.
You just, are.
Inhale,
Exhale,
Inhale,
Exhale,
The act of moving seemed torturous in your mind.
You can already feel so much, how could you even dare think about feeling other stuff.
You just,
Didn’t want to feel anymore.
Every sensation, every movement feels overwhelming.
Like a tsunami of things to focus on.
You don't even know where to start or what to do.
You just lay there.
Existing
You squeeze your eyes closed tighter, desperately trying to ignore the light that still permeated through your eyelids.
Hoping that the quiet peace of sleep will overtake you.
It doesn’t
You can’t sleep.
It’s just waves upon waves of noises and feelings.
It’s awful
You hate it
You hate it so much.
You want to rip off the blankets and sheets and get out of this bed and scream, but you know that doing that would just introduce more unpleasant sensations which would be even worse than what you’re experiencing right now.
Even though you know that your brain is still demanding you get rid of the things that are touching you and instead of doing anything, you just stay there and stew in your bubbling resentment and irritation at everything and anything.
You’re just stuck in this cycle of hating everything and wanting it to be different, but fearing that difference and also being too tired to do anything about it.
That just gets worse and worse and the burning anger and frustration just keeps building in your chest and you’re helpless to stop it.
You know it’s not rational and it’s dumb, but it’s still there and you just feel like a helpless shell that’s about to burst with the amount of things that you’re feeling and you hate it and that just makes it worse.
You’re so caught up with everything you’re feeling that you don’t even notice the shaking of the floors, nor the frantic footsteps and the slamming open of the door.
All you can focus on is the pressure and anger and rage and helplessness that’s building inside of you.
Then it stops.
Distantly you can feel some foreign energy pressing against you.
It’s unpleasant, but in a soothing manner.
You can feel all that resentment and anger slowly shrink.
It doesn’t go away, it’s still there, sitting as a small lump inside you, noticeable at every move.
But it’s not overwhelming.
An artificial calm washes over you, relaxing your limbs and making you sleepy.
You can hardly remember why you were so irritated in the first place.
You’re just tired,
You want to sleep,
So you do.
~
The Adeptus breathes a huge sigh of relief as the ground stops shaking.
Even with the strongest of sealing spells placed around this domain, the power of the creator is still one to behold.
Thankfully the calming spell Cloud Retainer gave him works in soothing the sleeping deity.
She said it was one that she had used to calm Shenhe’s bloodlust back when she was younger. It became much less effective over time and as her disciple grew in age, but it works as a temporary measure.
The Yaksha had many doubts in using the spell, after all Shenhe was only human, how could using this on her even compare to using that on a god, nevermind the creator of the world.
But it did,
Somehow.
As much as Lord Lapis assured him that the creator had been weakened greatly, Xiao still had his doubts.
After all, even in a half conscious state, they managed to crack the barriers placed upon this domain to seal in their power and resentment.
Not that he’s particularly happy that these barriers have been placed there.
He sighed, feeling every single one of his centuries.
As much as the Traveler teased him for looking young, he was one of the senior Adepti and the years to prove it.
He knew many of the tales about the creator of Teyvat, not as much as Lord Lapis of course , but much more than even the most learned of human scholars.
He knew of their actions, their allies, their feats.
And their downfall.
It was not quick, nor was it pretty or honorable.
But it was how Celestia conquered Teyvat.
It would be of no surprise to anyone had the creator returned with rage and blood.
If they’d come with a thirst for vengeance.
With intent to destroy their creation that had been turned against them.
But they did not.
Or
At least,
Their ∎∎∎∎ didn’t
The elusive outlander that appeared upon the borders of Liyue, dripping with the energy of the creator.
It wasn't that no one noticed their energy.
Simply that no one could recognize it.
After all, the only living being left who’s met the creator is the very same that defeated and sealed them away.
That he knew of mind you.
There is a good chance that there are those who’ve been around since the age of dragons still lurking in the dark corners of Teyvat.
However, they’ve made their presence scarce. Posing no real threat to Liyue, as such they were of no concern to him.
The soft clicking of shoes took him out of his thoughts.
The Traveler poked their head in, eyes drawing to the unconscious figure on the bed.
They then flickered over to him, silently asking for permission to enter.
He nods, stepping to the side, as to not disturb the sleeping deity.
“So how are they?” they asked quietly,
Xiao couldn’t hold back a sigh at that question.
It’s been several days now since they found the creator at the site of Azhdaha’s sealing.
Several days of going in and out of consciousness, all with dubious control over their powers.
“I apologize for the inconvenience,” he starts, feeling guilty at how slow things are progressing. It was the Traveler after all that had volunteered their own home, teapot, as a base of operations.
More so out of convenience, since at the time they had no idea when deity would awaken next, nor their condition, so taking them somewhere where any potential power leakage would not result in casualties was the first order of affairs.
As far as he knew, Lord Lapis had been working with many other of the Adepti to create a hidden domain where it would be safer to keep the creator, should the worst happen.
The Yaksha felt guilty that Lord Lapis had to step in and take control when he should be rightfully enjoying his retirement.
But in this case, he can’t say he’s not thankful for his steady presence.
Having to battle Osial without the steady support and presence of his Archion was a harrowing experience. Whilst he’s lost many companions in the field of battle, the Lord of Geo was always the steady presence that everyone believed in.
The person that would always overcome the enemy.
Losing him was like losing the very ground he walked on.
It was only the reminder of his duty and contracts that he was able to shoulder on.
Thankfully that was just a test, and one which they passed with the aid of the Traveler and the Qixing.
Whilst the Traveler is lending their aid in this endeavor, the Qixing.
Some affairs are not for mortals.
Even the idea of explaining the full, true history of Teyvat and how humans came to be is a burdensome task.
No,
It was best to leave this to the Adepti.
And the Traveler.
He snuck a look at the outlander standing beside him.
Well, standing is a strong word, they were leaning against the wall after all.
Their golden eyes flickered over to him, noticing his stare.
He resisted the urge to look away from their striking gaze, “Do you want me to get a chair?”
“I’ll keep watch,” They offered in response. The two having silently agreed not to leave the creator alone, or unguarded.
Trusting the Traveler with the task, Xiao headed out of the room.
He never spent much time in Adeptal abodes, despite having one tucked away somewhere is Juyun Karst, he seldom uses it.
It was far too removed from Guili Plains, where he tends to patrol the most. In all honesty, Wangshu Inn is probably his closest equivalent to an abode.
Not that he’s willing to admit it, he is well aware of the Qixing meddling with the Inn in question, how they’ve set it up to be a safe haven for him should he need one.
A kind but foolish sentiment. Should he ever require a safe haven, an inn full of humans will be the last place he’d go.
That doesn’t stop him from wanting to go there from time to time, especially if the chef is in.
He was getting distracted.
Xiao entered one of the rooms.
Ah, chairs.
It seemed the Traveler wasn’t the biggest fan in interior design.
Not that they were bad at it. When they put their mind to it, the rooms were elegantly decorated with good quality furniture.
When it wasn’t,
Well.
He stared at the piles of furniture, haphazardly stacked around the room.
At least it was clean?
The Yaksha grabbed two of the closest chairs and started moving back towards the guest bedroom.
Whilst he was making his way there, he heard the sound of the front door opening.
Peeking over the banister, he saw Lord Lapis enter, adjusting his sleeves slightly.
He moved over to catch his eye, he bowed, as much he could with his cargo, which was really more of an exaggerated nod.
The retired Archon climbed the stairs to join him in his journey.
In hindsight he should’ve grabbed an extra chair.
Or even a table.
Well it’ll look weird if he went back now.
As the two walked, Lord- Zhongli, filled him in on the happenings outside the teapot.
Some of the other Adepti were assisting in his workload as much as they were able.
Something he was grateful for.
And the domain for the creator was almost complete.
Now it was simply the task of moving them to it, without disturbing them.
Whilst Xiao took no pleasure in his duties of extinguishing the spirits of fallen gods, rarely has he wished to be out on patrol as much as he does right now.
He knew exactly why he was being set on guarding duty.
Even if he wasn’t fond of that fact.
Steadfastly ignoring the flickering spark inside his chest, he set the chairs down by the Traveler, who smiled in response.
Lo- Zhongli strode past the two of them to examine the condition of the unconscious deity.
The figure, stirred at his presence, their energy rising as a result of that.
He sighed, backing off, gesturing at Xiao.
That’s when the Yaksha reluctantly approached the creator.
They stayed calm.
For him.
It was of great surprise to him when he was blessed.
To everyone really.
He was the first properly documented case after all.
Not that he was the first to be blessed, he believed that honor lay with some Mondstatian knight, nor was he the first Liyuan, he suspects some human may have received the blessing before him.
But for a period of time.
He was the only one they knew of.
That could recognize the blessing at least.
He was greatly favored for a period of time as well.
His skill grew at a rate it hadn’t since the days of the Archon war. Back when growing was the difference between life and death.
His karmic debt,
Was also greatly lessened.
To this day, the pain has never increased past the day he was blessed.
There were days where he felt the full force of his karmic debt.
And days where he felt light as a feather.
He hated those days.
Grateful
But also hateful.
Because it would never last.
It was only ever a glimpse of peace.
A flicker of freedom.
Sometimes hope could be crueler than pain.
Pain he knew, he understood.
A sharp blunt hammer of agony bearing into his soul.
He was used to that.
But hope,
Hope is like a weed,
Ever growing and persistent.
You can get used to pain. He did after all.
You can’t get used to hope.
Hope is greedy.
It always wants more.
He was getting distracted.
Xiao approached the sleeping creator.
They didn’t stir, their energy, a shifting cloud around their figure, accepted him into its embrace.
It swirled around him, suppressing his karmic debt, rejuvenating his energy and soothing aches and pains he didn’t know he had.
It’s addicting
He hates it.
Stepping forward, he gently lifts the creator.
Cradling them in his arms, as one would a damsel or so Cloud Retainer would say.
Many good things came with her moving to the Harbor.
Her interest in Inazumen light novels was not one of them.
Apparently she gained some ideas regarding his relationship with the Traveler.
Ideas that he thought he stomped out when he first got blessed.
There was once a theory that the Traveler was the one who gave out the blessings.
And that the strength of the blessing was directly correlated with the strength of one’s relationships with them.
It was wrong.
Unfortunately the ideas that stemmed from that theory did not die the same death the theory did.
He respected the Traveler greatly.
That’s all.
“Xiao,”
He didn’t jump at their soft voice.
He didn’t
Thankfully the sleeping deity didn’t stir,
Much
He also resisted the urge to bristle when the Traveler placed their hand on his back.
This is only to get out of the teapot, he reminded himself as the two teleported out of the teapot.
Their hand was warm.
He could still feel its imprint well after they let go.
Lord L- Zhongli appeared beside him soon after.
“Where to?” He asked.
~
It,
It wasn’t far,
Not in the grand scheme of things,
Liyue is huge after all, it would take a mortal days to traverse on foot.
Except well,
They didn’t have days,
Who knew the next time the creator’s energy would lash out.
This time without layers of sealing spells surrounding them, he didn’t want to think of the carnage.
It was only a couple hours of travel.
Made much faster by Lo- Zhongli’s foresight in clearing the way of both enemies and cough inconvenient walking terrain.
Not that any errant enemies would dare approach. Considering the sheer amount of energy dripping off of the creator, any creature with even a shred of self preservation would know not to attack them.
The three walked in silence.
Not out of awkwardness, it was a comfortable silence all things considered.
Well, as comfortable as can be considering how dangerous the passenger in his arms was.
Thankfully, they didn’t stir throughout the entire journey, their head resting peacefully on his chest.
It wasn’t long before they made it to the domain.
It was between Mt Hulao and Mt Xuanlian
A deceptively peaceful area, with a secret domain hidden behind a waterfall.
The three made their way inside.
Out of the corner of his eye, he spotted Cloud retainer, or well Xianyun in this form, as she double checked some of the seals by the entrance.
He quickly made his way to the center of the domain, a large circular room, with layer upon layer of sealing spells and barriers set up.
A simple bed, placed in the center of it all.
He put them down gently, only to tense as their energy flared.
The Traveler and Lord Lapis tensed too, preparing for their awakening.
Only for it to settle down.
Xiao breathed a sigh of relief, teleporting out of the circle and nodding to Rex Lapis, who activated the barriers.
The room lit up with golden sigils. A beautiful display of Geo power, creating sparkling barriers around the center of the room.
The plain stone walls looked as if they were inlaid with gold. The barriers are akin to the finest of silk, thinner than spiderwebs, doming around the sleeping figure.
“Now, all that’s left is for them to wake up,” Lord Lapis announced solemnly.
He looked tired.
Understandably so,
No one expected this to happen, a deity of this scale is one that Celestia would struggle against, never mind a lone retired Archon.
Xiao knew his strength, he knew Lord Lapis’s strength, but he also knew of the feats of the creator.
He knew that should they truly wish to escape, these barriers would be naught but paper walls for them to tear through.
All the Yaksha could hope for was their continued slumber.
As the three trailed out of the domain, sealing the paths behind them as they went.
The slumbering figure trapped inside shifted.
The heavy layers of Geo energy crushing themself against their body made themselves known.
It was heavy,
Crushing,
Solid,
Familiar,
A familiar energy,
One of an old enemy.
Flashed of a man, a beast.
A figure of brown and gold, with a white hood.
A warm hand extending out.
The gift of vision, of light.
Of time of companionship.
Of joy.
Of battle.
Of war.
Of loss.
Of grief.
Of Anger and hate.
Hate and fear and anger.
Confusing feelings of hate and love, of joy and sorrow.
You remember who these memories belong to.
You remember his form.
His face,
His name.
Azhdaha.
In the dark cave, hidden behind layers of rock and seals and a waterfall.
Glowing slitted eyes, snap open.
~~~
Masterlist | Prev Part
Oops, looks like I forgot to fix up that cliff hanger huh?
My Askbox is always open!
Taglist: @bunniotomia,@lucid-stories, @ymechi, @chocogi, @ra404, @ash1, @esthelily, @tottybear, @mmeatt, @quacking-simp, @reemthetheme, @universallyenthusiastsage, @resident-cryptid, @fantasyhopperhea, @thedevioussmirk, @etherisy, @naynayaa ,@mel-star636, @chericia, @aithane, @mmeatt, @xrosegorex, @amidst-the-tempest, @8-sinner-8, @reapersan, @elementalia ,@strangeygirl
113 notes
·
View notes
Text
just let me help you | tech x reader
warnings: small injury
(shoutout to my sister for this fic idea☝🏻)
-
“Kriff”, was not the first irritated word to leave techs mouth.
He had been working on fixing a part of the marauders control panel for the last 20 minutes.
All of his efforts, however, are to no avail.
A pair of footsteps walks up behind him and sighs, “Tech, I’m calling in someone from the hangar”, hunter says.
Tech just adjusts his goggles and continues tinkering with the controls, “That is unnecessary, I can fix it.”
Hunter knows full well that tech is capable of fixing just about anything, but they were on a serious time crunch to get off of this planet.
-
You’re making some minor adjustments to one of your astromecs when a tall, dark haired man with a face tattoo walks up to you.
“Are you a mechanic?”
The hand that’s holding a wrench stills as you look down at your dusty coveralls and back at him with a “What does it look like?” look.
He laughs lightly, “Were kind of in a hurry and could use some help, we can’t pay much, but it would be really appreciated.”
You stand up, dust off your legs and push your glasses farther up your nose, “Payment isn’t needed, lead the way.”
-
You walk into the cockpit of their ship and see a man looking very frustratedly at some loose wires, “I am getting there, hunter.”
“I’ve never seen an omicron class attack shuttle with these modifications before.”
He stops what he’s doing immediately and turns around, “Pardon me, I thought you were my brother.”
The way he’s looking at you makes your face turn slightly pink, “I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to barge in or anything.”
He adjusts his goggles, “Who are you, exactly?”
You fiddle with your eyewear as well and tell him your name, “I’m a mechanic here at the hangar, your brother sent me.”
He looks at you silently for a second before swallowing and facing away from you, “I am Tech. However, I can manage this, you may go back to your duties around the hangar.”
You cross your arms and tilt your head, “Your brother said that you’ve been working on it for a while, can I just take a look?”
He glances at you sideways and moves over slightly, “I suppose a second opinion wouldn’t be a negative thing.”
You smile softly and make your way over to the control panel, looking at every single detail and focusing on each piece.
Tech, of course, notices how entranced you seem to be by the technology of the ship and can’t help but stare at you.
The way your glasses fall down your nose slightly, the way your eyebrows slightly furrow, the way you bite your bottom lip, he takes note of it all. Your focus might be on the controls, but techs focus is all on you.
Tech blindly reaches for some random wires, seeing how his gaze can’t be torn away from your face, and you notice, “Wait, don’t put those toget-“, your voice cuts off.
You warn him a little too late, and he brings a wire down onto another and shocks his fingers.
He lets out a startled sound and backs away, “Are you alright?”
He looks at you and the way that you’re worriedly checking his hand, “I, I think I will manage.”
You look up at him with a quirked brow, “It would kill you to ask for help, wouldn’t it?”
You swear he’s slightly blushing, “I suppose it wouldn’t cause extensive damage to my health.”
A grin breaks out onto your face as you both sit in chairs opposite from each other. You pull out a small med kit from your satchel.
You hold his hand and slowly peel off his glove. You start to feel almost nervous. All you’re doing is taking off his glove but it feels so… close.
You gently inspect his fingers, “It’s not too bad, you just got a first degree burn on your pointer finger and thumb.”
You look up to see him looking at you silently with his lips parted, but after a second or two, he clears his throat, “That’s the conclusion I came to as well.”
As you wrap his fingers in bacta patches and dry wraps, you speak up, “So, are you and your brothers soldiers?”, you gesture to his armor.
“My brothers and I are enhanced clones from kamino. I suppose we are technically still soldiers, just for a different cause.”
You furrow your eyebrows, “Enhanced? I’ve heard of clones because of the war, but I never knew there were enhanced ones.”
Tech adjusts his goggles, “Yes, each of my brothers has an enhanced trait. Hunter can track and sense any electromagnetic frequency on the planet, crosshairs marksmanship is unlike any you will ever see, wrecker has the strength of approximately 100 regular clones and I have what would be referred to as a brilliant mind.”
You finish bandaging his fingers but his hand stays loosely on top of yours, “I find that men with the highest intelligence quotients tend to be the most engaging and endearing.”
He looks a little flushed and maybe even taken aback, but recovers quickly, “That is one way to characterize those with a mind similar to mine.”
You look at him for a few seconds before awkwardly clearing your throat, “Well, we should probably get back to fixing up your ship. Try not to connect two opposing wires this time around.”
You once again feel nervous around the brilliant clone. The way he looks at you, it is almost as if he is seeing the beautiful blue lakes of Naboo for the first time.
He stands next to you as you resume inspecting the controls, “Technically, it was not my fault.”
You snort, “Is that so?”
“Yes. I am not used to being in the company of someone who has a mind like mine, it is very distracting. The amount of beauty you have in your face alone does not help my situation. Neither does the fact that every other part of you is equally radiant and stunning.”
You nearly choke. Tech thought you were beautiful?
Somehow, your face becomes more blushed, “I don’t know about my beauty being as much as you say”, you awkwardly laugh.
Tech glances over at you, “Those who do not acknowledge your beauty simply do not have the brain capacity to realize how exquisite you really are.”
You bite your lip to hide your smile, “You’re one to talk. I blush everytime you look me in the eye.”
He’s about to say something else but he catches the look of confusion on your face, “Is everything alright?”
You point to a switch below the controls, “Your power switch is turned off. Tech, there’s nothing wrong with your controls”, you can’t help but laugh.
You turn the switch on and the panel comes to life, “I did not realize that somebody turned off the switch.”
“You’re welcome.”
The two of you turn around to see a tall man with a tattoo over his eye and a toothpick in his mouth, one of his brothers, probably.
He points his toothpick at tech, “I had to get her here somehow. You’re welcome”, he walks away.
You grin and cross your arms, “So your ship was fine this whole time?”
“That is correct, but I was not aware of that.”
“And why would your brothers bring me here?”
“Perhaps they noticed my gaze linger on you for longer than usual when we first arrived.”
#star wars#the bad batch#bad batch#star wars bad batch#tbb#tech x fem!reader#tech the bad batch#tech fanfic#tech x reader#tech bad batch#tech star wars#tbb tech#the bad batch tech#tech#tech x you#tbb x reader#tbb x you#tbb tech x reader#tbb tech x you#tech tbb#clone troopers#clones x reader#clone x reader#clone trooper x reader#star wars fic#star wars fanfiction#bad batch fic#tbb fic#one shot#x reader
94 notes
·
View notes
Text
i miss you, i’m sorry- m. sturniolo
pairing: situationship!matt sturniolo x reader
summary: both you and matt have been miserable for the last week. matt (with the help of nick), realizes he made a mistake and is desperate to win you back.
warnings: language, angst, fluff, nick is a g
masterlist
lowercase intended
a/n: part two of i know it won’t work is finally here!! enjoy 🫶
empty. that’s how you’ve been feeling for the past week. you’ve lost all the motivation you once had. you can barely even get out of bed to take a shower or eat. you feel like complete shit.
you know that ending things with matt was the right thing to do, but why does it feel so wrong? matt has been texting and calling for the past few days, but you haven’t responded, knowing you have to stay strong and not run back to him.
the moment you met matt, you truly believed he was the one. you began to imagine the rest of your life with him, not being able to fathom him not being in it. you never thought, even in your wildest dreams, your relationship with matt would have ended the way it did. you love matt, more than anything in the world, but you can’t put yourself in that position again. matt doesn’t love you the way you love him, and you have to find a way to live with that.
you’re watching modern family in your bedroom when your phone rings next to you. you pick up the phone and see that it’s nick. you don’t want to let what happened with matt affect your relationship with chris and nick, but it’s so hard when they constantly remind you of him. nevertheless, you answer the call with a “hello?” “y/n! hey how are you doing?” nick was always the triplet you were closest with, even while you were with matt. he always checked up on you. “i’m fine.” you answer, but he doesn’t believe it. “you don’t have to lie to me babe. how are you really?” you can feel your eyes start to water. “i’m not okay nick.” you sniffle. “why doesn’t matt want me? i was so sure he did.” you can almost hear nick frown over the phone. “he’s a fucking idiot, y/n. he’s too dumb to see what’s right in front of him. what happened wasn’t your fault i promise.” he assures you. “i just really wanted it to work out.” you wipe your eyes to get rid of the tears, but they continue to fall. “i know hon, but you’ll be okay. you’re the strongest person i know. you’ll get through this.” you nod even though he can’t see you. “yeah you’re right.” “i always am.” you laugh a little at nick’s words. “if you ever need anything, you know you can call me right?” he asks. “yeah i know. thank you nick. for everything.” you respond. “of course y/n. i’ll call you later. i love you.” “i love you too nick.” you say before hanging up.
nick set his phone down on the couch before standing up and walking into matt’s room. he opens the door to see matt lying in bed, just staring at his phone. nick walks towards him and he can see matt looking at pictures of you and him. “matt.” nick begins. matt’s head shoots up before quickly shutting off his phone. “jesus can you knock?” matt snaps at him. “you’re such a dumbass, you know that right?” nick tells him. “what the hell is that supposed to mean?” matt questions. “i can’t believe you were the one that let her go, yet here you are sulking. you have no right to be sad. you fucked everything up with y/n!” nick began to raise his voice. matt doesn’t say anything and just looks down at his lap. “matt? hello? are you listening to me?” nick snaps his fingers to get his attention. “you don’t think i know that i fucked up?!” matt stands up from his bed. “i regret letting her walk out! i regret telling her that i didn’t want to be with her! i regret everything i said to her that day because none of it was true! i love her nick!” matt yells. nick just stands there, shocked at his confession. matt then sighs and sits back down, holding his head in his hands. “i miss her so much, man.” nick walks over and sits down next to him. “then go tell her that. don’t let her go until you let her know how you really feel because that girl is heartbroken because she thinks you don’t love her back.” matt looks up at him. “but what if she doesn’t want me back?” nick stares at matt with sympathy in his eyes. “trust me she will, and even if she doesn’t, at least you’ll know.” matt nods. “you’re right. i’m gonna go over there.” he stands up to change his clothes and grab his keys.
matt walks out the door and into his car. before matt goes to your apartment, he stops at the grocery store to get you your favorite flowers and candy. he pulls into your apartment complex and grabs the flowers and candy before running towards your apartment. once he arrives at your doorstep, he take a deep, shaky breath and knocks.
you’re in your kitchen making something to eat when you hear a knock at your door. you raise an eyebrow before walking over to open it. once you do, you see matt standing in front of you, holding your favorite flowers and candy. you immediately freeze, unsure of what to do or say. “y/n,” matt begins, “can i come in?” you stand to the side, letting matt inside. “umm these are for you.” he hands you the flowers and candy, and you walk over to your kitchen to set them on the counter. “what are you doing here, matt?” you ask in a somewhat cold tone. “i want to apologize for everything i said. i promise i meant none of it.” you just stare at him, saying nothing. “look, i know you probably don’t believe me. i wouldn’t either, but i do mean it when i say i really do want you. i was just scared. relationships honestly terrify me, and i guess i didn’t want to get hurt.” you sigh. “so you chose to hurt me instead?” “y/n, i promise that wasn’t my intention. you put me on the spot and i panicked. i know that we should have talked about it, but i decided to be an asshole and i am so, so sorry baby. i regret every cruel word that i said to you. just please-let me make this right.” matt begs. you think for a few seconds, still unsure if he actually means what he’s saying. “i don’t know matt. what you said hurt me. you hurt me. i trusted you and you threw that away. how can i be sure that you mean what you say? how can i trust you again?” you want to believe him so bad, but you can’t give into him just yet. “i promise i’m gonna do better. i’m gonna treat you the way you deserve. i’ll work every day to be the perfect boyfriend for you because i love you.” your eyes widen in shock. “you what?” you question him, thinking you heard him wrong. matt takes a step towards you. “i love you y/n. i love you so much it hurts. every time i look at you, i feel something i’ve never felt for anyone before.” he puts his hand on your cheeks, “i only want you, now and for the rest of my life. please, please give me this chance.” when he looks into your eyes, you can’t help but melt into his touch. your face softens. “oh matt,” you place your hands on his wrists, “i love you too.” he grins at your words. “really?” you roll your eyes playfully. “of course i do you fucking idiot.” you smile at him. “i’m just making sure because i-” he’s cut off by you pressing your lips against his. matt’s caught off guard, but melts into the kiss. his hands travel down to your waist and squeeze your hips lightly.
you pull away from the kiss and press your forehead against his. you let out a sigh of content. “what is it baby?” matt asks you. you smile and shake your head lightly, “i’m just happy.” he smiles as well before bringing his forehead away from yours. “y/n,” he begins, and you give him a look, silently telling him to go on, “can i be your boyfriend?” he asks, somewhat nervously. you grin, “yes matt you can be my boyfriend.” you look at him with love and affection in your eyes. matt lets out a breath, “okay good because that would have been really embarrassing if you said no.” “shut up.” you tell him before leaning up and kissing him once again, both of you smiling into the kiss.
#Spotify#matt sturniolo#matthew sturniolo#matt sturniolo x reader#matt sturniolo imagine#matt sturniolo smut#matt stuniolo fanfic#matt sturniolo fluff#matt sturniolo angst#matthew sturniolo x reader#matthew sturniolo imagine#matthew sturniolo fanfic#matthew sturniolo angst#matthew sturniolo x you#matt sturniolo x you#matthew sturniolo smut#matthew sturniolo fluff#sturniolo triplets#nick sturniolo#nicolas sturniolo#sturniolo
104 notes
·
View notes
Text
Us & You Pt 2
DILF Kirishima Eijiro x Teacher Reader
Context: Kirishima Eijiro has done everything to forget Bakugou Katsuki in his life and just focus on his daughter, his amazing and loving daughter. The light of his eye. Due to an incident, Eijiro meets you, a teacher at his daughter school who he can’t help but fall for. However, as his daughter grows older and questions start being asked, it feels like the peace he tried to cultivate is slipping through his fingers.
Note: First menstrual cycle, mentions of blood, first bra shopping!!!, mention of alcohol, Single dad Eijiro.
PLEASE NOTE BEFORE READING THIS SHORT SERIES: There will be some deep discussions about morality, children, abortion arguments pertaining to Pro life vs Pro choice as well as the father’s role in raising a child/conceiving a child. It also deals with the struggles of being a single parent. It’s very messy and very much real life. Katsuki is Trans in this story (mostly cause I couldn’t find another character to be Sachiko’s mom and you’ll see why).
[PART 1] [AO3 Link]
Eijiro sprayed some of his cologne on his neck as he looked himself in the mirror. He tried not to be nervous but he would be lying if he said he wasn’t. He hadn’t been on a date in years and honestly, he felt a bit rusty. He tried to look his best for the date he had with you tonight but he wasn’t entirely sure how it would go, but he was optimistic. I mean, he had spent the last two weeks texting you non-stop and enough for Akari to start getting suspicious and report back to the rest of his sisters who were now all hounding him for details.
Eijiro didn’t want to say anything. He never liked to say anything about the first couple of dates. He knew that those things were uncertain. You could never truly tell how it would fall and he just hoped that he wouldn’t regret it.
But there just seemed something about you that had him lowering his guard a bit. That had him feeling raw and open. Honestly it had him terrified, but maybe it was a good thing.
“Daddy,” Sachiko walked to stand in the doorway in her home clothes. She was dressed comfortably in sweatpants and a hoodie. At the sight of her father all dolled up she had her eyebrows raised in surprise. She tilted her head to the side almost like a confused puppy, her wide red eyes staring at him. “Where are you going?” She asked.
“I…” He started as he turned to face her. “am going on a date.”
Sachiko let out a sound in surprise, not having expected that. She didn’t really know anything about her father’s love life, nor did she think he even had a love life, so he must be really happy about this one to tell her that. Or maybe it was just a sign that she was getting older enough to understand. She walked over to him. “With who?” She asked. She moved to pick up styling cream. Eijiro helped move her onto the counter to sit there as she started to do his hair. “Do I know who she is?”
Eijiro let out a sigh. “You do.” He wasn’t going to dance around it. He’s number one priority was his daughter, which also meant her acceptance too. Even though here he wanted to be selfish, if this went well, it would affect her too.
She sat up excitedly at an idea. “Are you finally getting together with Aunty Mina?” She asked almost in hope.
Eijiro laughed as he shook his head. “No, pumpkin. Mina and I are just friends.” He reminds her, earning a disappointed sigh from her as she started to drag her hands through his locks, pushing his hair back, allowing the black locks of hair to look glossy. “No… you are actually the reason we met.”
“Really?”
He nodded his head confirming it. Sachi thought about it but came up short. She wasn’t entirely sure who it could possibly be. She just hoped you would be pretty and nice to her father at least, before anything else. He hesitated for a moment before looking into the mirror. “How would you feel if I told you that I was taking Ms Y/N on a date?”
Sachiko paused as she looked up at her father surprised. “The maths teacher?” He nodded his head. She was silent for a moment as she thought it over in her head. The small second of a moment made his heart pause. She let out a smile looking up at him. “She’s nice, I like her. I think you’d be nice for each other.” She expressed as she hopped off the counter and turned to wash her hands. Eijiro’s eyebrows raised in surprise at her response. He wasn’t sure what he was expecting from her but he wasn’t really sure if it was that. She turned to look back at him. She smiled up at him, looking him over before returning her crimson eyes up to him. “She likes certain flowers, not all of them, she really does like acts of service more than gifts but she likes being spoiled too. Don’t be afraid of being too much, she likes to see the real you more than anything.” Sachi advised.
Eijiro raised an eyebrow amusedly but chuckled. “Okay then.”
“Also don’t ask about past partners. She dated this one guy called Sanemi, he was such a bad guy. We don’t like him.”
Eijiro just nodded, knowing never to question why girls don’t like specific people. “We do not like Sanemi.” He affirmed. He then looked down at Sachiko with a raised eyebrow. “Why does it feel you’re supporting her more than me.”
“I never said that.”
“Mhm.” He looked down at her suspiciously, making her give him a bright sharp grin that only made him laugh.
You sat across from Eijiro at a fancy restaurant you had learned that he loved to visit. It wasn’t necessarily too expensive that you couldn’t even afford more than the water but it was very much not for anything casual. The two of you were laughing more than anything, sitting across from each other at your table. You had tried dressing to impress, a simple black dress and heels, nothing too extravagant but it seemed to be a smart choice, considering he came in all black too.
You couldn’t help but admire how handsome he was. He truly was the most gorgeous man you had ever seen. With ruby eyes that seemed to be so gentle and warm and looked at you as if you were the only thing worth noting, long dark hair that you thought made him unbelievably more sexy and not to get started on how big he was. He practically dwarfed you and you couldn’t help but think about it a lot.
When you had told Melissa about him, she was super excited.
“Who is he? What does he look like? Oh he’s sexy and a DILF. He kinda looks familiar. Where did you find him? Does he have a brother?”
Something you left to the end to tell her was how he was over ten years older than you. Now you didn’t really see a problem in that really, I mean he was nice, clearly has done well for himself so far and he wasn’t just into you because you were younger than him or something like that. You actually liked that he was older than you. It made you feel almost like he had everything under control. Almost like… well… like he could take care of you.
“So you can imagine how much of a bully she is in the work space.” Eijiro commented on a story he was telling you about his older sister, Akari who seemed dead set on using him to her hearts content.
You couldn’t help but giggle at the thought. “Okay, has your family dynamic always been so close?” You asked leaning forward, dinner having been long over as you were waiting on desert.
Eijiro chuckled as he lifted the glass of wine to his lips. “Yah, fortunately we have. We’ve always been pretty close knit. My father worked a lot but somehow always made time for us, and my mother was a stay at home mom so we really had everything we needed together. I really appreciate them, especially…” You watched him hesitate for a moment. You saw the gears turning in his head but it seemed as though he decided it was better to say it. “Especially when I found out about Sachi.”
You hummed, “That must have been hard, raising her so young.”
He nodded with furrowed eyebrows. “It was.” He put down his glass. “But my family made it easier.”
“You and Sachiko’s mom…” You were hesitant to talk about it but it was something you thought you should be a little bit aware about if you were going to deal with some psycho ex or something. You watched your desert come, plated in front of the both of you. You gave the waiter a smile, waiting for him to leave before continuing. “Are the two of you on good terms?” You asked him.
Eijiro didn’t answer immediately. He wasn’t sure how to answer if he was entirely honest, he didn’t know how to give you that answer. It was a messy explanation and one he wouldn’t want to go into but he knew he should at least answer you that much. He shifted uncomfortably in front of you, instantly making you feel bad.
“I’m sorry, I shouldn’t have-”
“No, no, it’s okay.” He stopped you with a forced smile, raising a hand to stop what you were saying. “Uh… We aren’t speaking to put it lightly. We haven’t spoken for years, since… he gave up all parental rights, actually. A bit after that.” Your eyebrows raised slightly at the mention of he. Eijiro cleared his throat as he picked up his fork and stabbed the cake slice on his plate. “You don’t have to worry about that, if it’s something you’re concerned about.”
You immediately put a smile to your face not wanting to alarm him or make him feel more uncomfortable than how you forced him to be just now. “I just wanted to find out if I have to fight off crazy ex’s.” The comment made him laugh, lightening the mood.
He shook his head. “No crazy ex’s. Just one eleven year old and seven nosey sisters.” He reminded you.
“The eleven year old seems to be the big underlying factor.”
“Definitely.” He lifted his wine glass up to his lips, some expensive wine from a year so far back you were sure they didn’t even know how to store wine properly back then. “It’s hard.” He started, looking down at the wine in his glass. “Raising her in such a world nowadays.” Eijiro had this odd way of answering you and yet withholding somethings of what he thought as well. It was almost as if he was hesitant or maybe even scared to share his full heart with you.
You nodded your head, moving to pick up your spoon. “It sure is. The world is basically raising them and that can influence so many factors. Especially at such a young age where girls are so impressionably.” You furrowed your eyebrows at the thought as you shook your head. “All those magazines, online models, influencers and adverts that show them unrealistic expectations of their body and how they should look like. It really makes them all so depressed about how they look nothing like them.”
“Right!” You looked up half surprised at the show of emotion from him. “It gets me so worried constantly. I mean, Sachi has always been more on the girly side, which I don’t mind cause I think it suits her and I want whatever makes her happy, but then I hear from her friend’s mothers that I’m not allowing my daughter the freedom of expression. That I’m forcing her to wear girly clothes. Like honestly, they speak to me as if I don’t know my own daughter. I don’t-”
You watched as Eijiro got so passionately heated about this. You watched his facial expressions change and morph as he speaks with his hands and motioned around broadly about everything he was saying. You leaned forward, your head resting on your fist as you watched him, half forgetting about dessert entirely.
It was the first time you had heard him speak so much in succession, unsurprisingly it was about Sachiko but you found it cute. He was her father after all and that was his world. Trying to be a good parent for her. And hearing him ramble about how he was so close to punching some ten year olds mother all because she assumed that as a single father he was stereotyping his daughter, was both amusing and also amazing to see. You loved to watch him as he talked, it only made him more handsome.
“I don’t know how anyone can deal with that woman. I don’t like sending Sachiko to sleepovers and playdates because of that sort of influence. Who knows what she’s saying to her own child let alone mine when I’m not there. I don’t need Sachiko thinking the way we live his weird or odd.” Eijiro turned to look at you. You watched him with a fascinated look in your eyes as you just stared at him with a gentle smile. Eijiro hesitated but realised he had been talking your ear off. “Sorry,” He scratched the back of his head with a cheesy smile. “I didn’t mean to-”
“You’re valid for feeling such a way. What she said wasn’t right with any substantial proof and it isn’t like Sachiko looks uncomfortable in what she wears either. You are right for just letting her be.” You interrupted him but confirmed everything he was saying.
For a moment Eijiro stared at you before pulling on another smirk. He scoffed and nodded his head. “Yah… I guess I am.” Suddenly it felt like the heat was switched onto you. He leaned to the side, a slight smirk on his face as he kept his eyes on you, his eye contact making you feel rather funny inside. “So tell me… how are you still single?”
You let out a chuckle. “What?”
“I’m serious.” He affirmed as he tilted his head. “How is it that you’re still single? Is it by choice? Looking and just haven’t found the right one?”
“I could ask you the same question.”
“Oh sweetheart, no you can’t.” His voice dropped as he chuckled. It sounded so condescending and yet so delicious on his tongue. It made the butterflies in your stomach flutter even more. “I have a lot more experience in the dating world than you. I chose to be single. You… You’re young,” He started listing on his fingers, “Well educated, you have a job, you’re beautiful, good with children, I don’t see why you aren’t swooped off your feet yet.”
You shrugged lightly, a slight smirk of your own as you looked back to him. “I am here, aren’t I?” You asked softly. You saw his eyebrow twitch at that. You eased as you looked down with a more forced smile. “No… guys my age… just aren’t ready for the level of commitment and respect that I want in a relationship. I’m tired of hookup culture. I want to fall in love and go on pretty dates and have simple days that are just one in a thousand but mean the world. I don’t want the constant partying and hopping from couch to bed to bar.” You motioned with your spoon around. “It’s… it’s hard… Call it what you will but…” You sighed as you looked off to the side for a moment.
You weren’t lying. It was tiring always being met with guys who said your expectations were too high just for asking for loyalty and respect. You wanted to be someone’s everything. You didn’t want to be their side thing or one of the many girls in their roaster. You didn’t want a just a guy, or a boyfriend. You wanted a man. You wanted your boyfriend. But life had its way of flipping you around.
“Hey Y/N.” You hummed, still absently staring off at the way to the kitchen of the restaurant. “Y/n… Y/N, look at me.” You turned to look at him, noticing that he had his large hand over yours. The way he seemed to dwarf you always made you felt small but the way he was looking at you made you feel something else. It made you feel… His warm ruby eyes looked at you gently, almost as if he was listening to everything you were saying and everything you didn’t. He gave you a gentle smile. “You aren’t asking for too much.”
Since then the two of you had been moving around each other like two fish in a pond. Never mind the fact that Eijiro was more like a shark, but it worked. He would text you whenever he got the time to, and often than not you would both talk your way through lunch if you were able to with your schedule. Marking and teaching plans took a lot of your time, and although Eijiro couldn’t organise himself to save his life, he did give you some advice he learnt from his personal assistant. He was cute that way.
He always had this way of making you feel so taken care of. Randomly you would receive gifts from him, either via post, on your dates or through Sachiko (who you always knew was carrying a gift for you from her dad, cause she would randomly pitch up before lunch to your classroom with a grin on her face that made you giggle every time you saw it).
One thing very noticeable about your new relationship was physical affection. You both loved it which was much of a relief. The first time he came to your apartment (Thanks Cammie for staying the night away), you both ended up on your couch him practically pushing you down into the cushions. You loved how large he was. It was hot. Literally because his body ran like a furnace. He always had a hand on you whenever you went on dates. On your hip, holding your hand, behind your neck, on your cheek. Wherever. It was amazing. Besides he had this element of control that left you breathless and eager for more.
But there was one rule that Eijiro had that had stayed strong. No sex.
It wasn’t a rule you had a problem with, finding it okay with you because you didn’t need sex to make a relationship (Eijiro was relieved to know you weren’t bothered by it). However, when things did get hot and heavy and you could both feel the ache of each other with your breaths hot and your lips numb and messy, he always pulled away. You had to applaud his self-restraint but it also made you wonder what made him so hesitant. So… dare you say… scared?
You had a feeling it had to do with being put in the same situation that he was put in when it came to Sachiko, one he never really delved deep in, for reasons you didn’t think he would say for a while. Whatever happened in the past, you didn’t judge nor guess. You let it be.
Eijiro was also a very protective person as you had learned to realise and also knew from the first day you met him. The first day that you would spend the day with both Eijiro and Sachiko was a planned one. One on comfortable ground for the two of them, in their apartment, safe. You would come over, make some lunch, bake some brownies and see how Sachiko responded. It was more of a test for Sachi and how she would feel with actually seeing that her dad and you were in a relationship and happily so, which meant you would be around her more often in such a relaxed setting.
It was planned to the ‘t’ of perfect and Eijiro had already planned everything.
That was until some unexpected events happened.
A scream ripped through the apartment, instantly jolting Eijiro awake. There was only one other person in the apartment that could have such a high-pitched scream and it instantly forced Eijiro stumbling out of bed. His heart racing in his ears as he tore the blankets off of him and quickly got onto his own two feet. “SACHI!” He shouted as he threw open the door, making it bang against wall as he ran down the corridor to her room.
He threw her bedroom door open.
Standing still in her frilly pyjamas was Sachiko who looked absolutely terrified as she looked to her bed. The fluffy bedding was pushed back to reveal a rather large stain of blood right there on the sheet of the mattress. Tears streamed down her face as she looked between the bed and her father. Her shorts were also a crimson red as well. Before anything could be said, she raced into the bathroom and locked the door.
Eijiro paused for a second trying to take everything out.
Okay. Blood.
Blood, bad.
Blood from Sachiko… That’s bad.
Sachiko not in pain?
So not that bad?
Blood, pyjama pants, tears, bed.
Eijiro’s shoulders dropped when it hit him, slight relief washing over him.
Period.
He had read about it in one of the many parenting books that he purchased every time Sachiko reached a new stage in her life. The pubescent stage was one he was not looking forward to but one he knew he had to handle. Turns out his reading would have to come into practice.
“Sachi…” He walked over to the door of her bathroom and knocked on it. “Sachi, sweetheart, please open the door. It’s okay.”
“No, its not!” He heard her sob from the other side. “Daddy, I’m dying!”
“You’re not dying sweetheart.” He spoke gently at the door. “You’re just… you’re growing up and you’re experiencing your first period. It’s just blood. Your aunts all went through it too. I promise we can solve this, just please,” He knocked on the door. “Open the door.”
“NO! You’re a boy, you don’t understand!”
He sighed as he brought a hand to his forehead trying to think what to do. This was getting nowhere and he knew breaking the door down wouldn’t help either. She clearly was embarrassed and scared and this wasn’t something it seemed she wanted his advice on either. Not that he had much. All he learnt from his sisters was don’t make them angry, give them chocolate or whatever they were craving and painkillers.
If she didn’t want to talk to him about it, he would have to respect that, for at least as long as her emotions were running high and she was like this. But who could he call? Akari wasn’t in town at the moment, only coming back tomorrow from a business trip. Ayah was visiting her husband’s parents. Hana was abroad, Tamami was at varsity (probably in a class) and the twins were still living with his parents. None of his female relatives were nearby.
Eijiro paused.
Well… it looked like you’d be visiting the Kirishima residence sooner than you all thought.
It didn’t take you long before you were at their door, and Eijiro allowed you in. You looked up to see Eijiro looking dishevelled. He still stood in what seemed to be shark boxers and was shirtless, he looked so relieved to see you there. You chuckled as he allowed you to step in. “You look like you’ve been through somethings.”
He slumped as he sighed. “You don’t know the half of it. I’m sorry to do this to you so early, Y/N.”
You shook your head with a friendly smile. “Oh please, Eijiro, it’s nothing I can’t handle.” You put a hand to the side of his face making him relax for a moment. You smiled up at him before looking around. “I apologise for being a bit late, I had to stop at the store to grab a few things. Where’s Sachiko?”
Eijiro motioned for you to follow him. You looked around the apartment. It was rather homey and yet also had a warm feeling too it. Despite knowing and seeing that it looked expensive, you could tell that a family lived here. On the walls you saw photos of Eijiro and Sachiko at various different times. There was one where Sachiko looked like a newborn and Eijiro didn’t seem aware of the photo that was being taken as he held her to his chest.
“I’ve been noticing over the past couple of months she’s been…” He hesitated as he glanced back at you. “Changing.” He tried putting it.
“And recently she was a lot more moody than normal. I thought maybe something was bothering her with her friends but apparently not.” He opened the door to another room. The bed was stripped of all its bedding and sheets, leaving a clean white mattress on the bed stand. You saw this as Sachiko’s bedroom with the amount of pastels, white and fluffy pillows and stuffed animals and fairy lights. He walked over to another door that was closed. Next to the door was a pillow with a clean change of clothes there. You motioned to them as he turned to face you. “She bled through her shorts.” He explained. “I think its best if you…” He motioned between you and the door and random other emotions with his hands. You chuckled and nodded.
You stepped closer to the door and knocked on it lightly. “GO AWAY!” You heard her shout from the other side.
“Sachiko.” You started as you leaned your head against the door. “It’s me, Miss Y/N. Are you okay, hun? Your dad and I are really worried about you.” At first you didn’t hear anything. You looked back to Eijiro and motioned for him to move out of sight. “I promise that your father isn’t here. It’ll just be you and me, sweetheart. I can try and help.”
It took a moment before you heard shuffling. The door opened and peeping through a crack in the door was Sachiko. Her face was flushed pink and her eyes were pink from crying. She sniffed as she looked up at you. “Are you sure he’s gone?” She whispered.
You chuckled and nodded your head, “I promise.” You whispered back.
With that, she let you in, opening the door for you to squeeze through. You took the change of clothes as well as you entered the bathroom. Sachiko moved to sit inside her bath tub away from you. “Sorry. I don’t want the blood everywhere.”
“It’s okay, sweetheart.” You moved to walk and sit outside the bathtub on the cool tiles, leaning over to rest your head on the edge as you were eye-level with her. You put down your bag that you were carrying and the change of clothes and faced her. “What happened, Sachiko?” You asked her softly.
She wiped her nose with a tissue as she looked at you. “I woke up with tummy cramps. I thought I just needed the bathroom but when I got up, I thought I peed myself. I looked down and all I saw was blood. It scared me.” She had her arms wrapped around her legs, keeping her limbs close to herself.
“And that’s okay. It’s alright to be scared.” You reminded her. “You know, your daddy was very scared to when he couldn’t reach you or help you.”
“I just…” She sighed as she rested her head on her arms. “I didn’t want to weird him out. It’s weird and icky.” She whined.
You couldn’t help but laugh and nodded your head. “It is weird, but it’s also natural. Your dad knows that, and you should too. Yah its blood coming out of a place that isn’t so nice to talk about and your body is changing a lot too, I know it’s weird and you’ve probably been feeling really gross in your body.”
She nodded her head affirmatively. “Mhm! Especially that weird white stuff that’s on my panties. That’s why I decided to wash all my own underwear.”
You smiled in amusement but proud of her resolve. “That’s called discharge, sweetheart. It’s just your bodies way of cleaning out your private parts naturally. Everything has a purpose. Even periods. Your uterus gets nice and ready for a baby that doesn’t come, with nice pillows (that’s what the blood is, by the way) and then when there isn’t one, your uterus gets very angry and, it tears it all off and it can only go out one way.”
Sachiko scrunched up her face. “But I don’t want a baby.”
You chuckled. “I know, but your body doesn’t know that. It just knows that you’ve reached puberty and you can have one, not that you should.”
Sachiko frowned as she huffed. She shook her head with a negative sound making you giggle, her ponytail moving back and fourth. She took a moment to think as she stayed where she was. Her black eyebrows furrowed before she looked up at you, rather shyly. “Do… Do you have a pad I could borrow?”
You gave her a smile as you reached into your bag and pulled out a whole packet. “I have a whole bag you can have.” You carefully picked up the new changed of clothes and handed it to her. “Do you know how to use one?” She shook her head. “Don’t worry, I can teach you.”
It took a few attempts and some praise but soon, Sachiko had changed into a tank top, and new fluffy lounge pants. With her more comfortable and her pyjamas now soaking to be washed, you could have a talk to her about puberty. She seemed to have a lot of questions that she felt too scared to ask her father about.
You talked about a whole bunch of things. You taught her the different symbols for flow on pads and tampon packaging, you gave her a box of pantyliners too and what those were used for. You also gave her a new little bag that you called a “Period pouch” with something of everything for her to put in.
You also taught her the most important thing in every female’s life, getting blood out of clothes. Because nothing is more necessary than knowing how to clean blood stains out of your favourite pair of undies.
With all the period stuff out of the way she could ask you all the stuff she wanted to ask.
Like about training bras. Turns out she owned training bras (good job Eijiro), but she needed ones with padding now and she really didn’t understand how the measurements on bras worked. You noted that in your head, promising to take her shopping soon to go buy her own ones (she thought it best you also ask Eijiro about this as well).
The two of you stoked up and organised her bottom drawer to suit her new needs. After some encouragement, you both left the room hand in hand (mind that you had to remind Sachiko that she doesn’t need to walk like a duck the whole time). You both went to the kitchen where Eijiro stood now in sweatpants, still shirtless of course but he wore an apron that read “That’s not burnt, that’s flavor” on it. Funny enough, his pan was on fire.
“Oh no.” He let out with wide eyes as he looked at the blaze in front of him. He lifted the pan and put it to the sink, effectively washing the fire away along with the bacon. He scratched the back of his head with furrowed eyebrows. “What was in those spices?” he asked himself as he moved to pick up a bottle.
You looked to Sachiko wide eyed. She looked up at you with crimson round eyes that weren’t the least bit surprised. “I do most of the cooking.” She informed you with a sigh. “Otherwise, we would starve.”
That comment made you laugh, getting the attention of Eijiro. Upon seeing the both of you, he lit up. “Hey! Sachi, you’re free!!” He moved to wipe his hands and meet the two of you halfway. “I was so worried.” He put his hands on her shoulders. “I know that growing up is weird and gross and you don’t want to talk about it with your old man, that’s okay, I get that. Just know that I’m here for you okay. I ordered some ice-cream and chocolate from the store, it should be here soon and-” You looked down at Sachiko as she stared up at her father. The giant of a man rambling off about all those things but all she got out of it was that he cared. And that was enough for her. “And I bought one of those warm heat patchy things that you can stick on your tummy, it had good ratings online and-” He was stopped by a tight hug from Sachiko, her face buried against his skin as she held on tightly to him.
“Thanks Daddy.” She whispered.
You watched as his ruby eyes softened at the sight of his daughter, putting a hand on her head. “It’s no problem, little miracle.” He ruffled her hair. Taking Sachiko and your attention was the large man sniffing as he started rubbing at his eyes. She raised an eyebrow up at him as he sniffled. “You’re so big now.” He let out in a wavering voice. “You were just my little girl and now…” He looked away as he tried to fight the tears.
“Daddy, don’t cry.” She urged as she pat his back, which only seemed to make the tears worse. You smiled at the dear sight, watching him so soft and sweet with his daughter. They were two peas in a pod, and clearly very much alike.
He wiped his eyes. “Oh dear.” He sniffed as he looked down at her. “I guess now it’s time to cut your hair.”
“Cut my hair!?” She asked confused, her eyebrows furrowed. “Why?”
Eijiro let out a breath as he scratched the back of his head. “Well, it’s just to symbolise a new part in your life. You’re growing up. All I know is that whenever one of my sisters had their periods for the first time, they cut their hair to their shoulders.” He told her. She let out a hum as she put a hand to her chin. “But if you don’t want to-”
“I wanna cut my hair.” She smiled. She then turned to look at you. “But all of this is thanks to Miss Y/N.”
You perked up at that. You waved a hand down and chuckled. “It’s nothing really. Although, how about I cook because, Eijiro you looked like you were starting a fire.” You joked as you pat his bicep, moving to the kitchen.
He looked at you offended before turning to look down at Sachiko with a shocked expression. She giggled at his face. “Did you hear that?”
“She isn’t wrong.”
He let out another dramatic gasp only making her giggle. You chuckle and shook your head as you moved over to grab an apron that was hanging off the wall. You noticed that at least his eggs looked good. You looked around for a pan. Sachiko moved Eijiro to force him to sit down, telling him that he wasn’t allowed to touch a pan for the rest of the day. “Let me help.” She grabbed you another pan before handing it to you.
You smiled over at her appreciatively. “Thank you, mind if you grab me some beans and tomatoes?” She nodded her head as she bustled around, trying to find what you were looking for.
Eijiro sat at the island table watching the both of you star eyed. Something told him that this would work out just fine.
Now after that, you were over at the Kirishimas probably more than you were at your own apartment (much to Melissa’s love and abuse of). It seemed as though with you bonding so much with Sachiko, something was lit inside of Eijiro you didn’t know how to describe. It was almost as if he was all over you now, which you totally didn’t mind. You found it amusing.
You and Sachiko also dragged Eijiro shopping, which he surprisingly didn’t mind as much. He got to see the both of you work together and drag him around a mall all afternoon while he got to spoil his two favourite girls. What more could a man ask for? However, Eijiro didn’t expect the last stop on the shopping list.
“Uh… what are we doing here?” He asked as he looked up at the underwear store in front of him with wide eyes, not entirely sure what he had gotten himself into. The poor man seemed to have gotten pale at the sight.
Sachiko turned to her father and motioned over somewhere else. “You can sit outside, Daddy. Ms Y/N and I have important business here.”
Eijiro raised an eyebrow to you. You raised your hands in surrender. “She asked to get her first bra. It seemed alright with me.”
He then turned down to Sachiko with a tilt of his head. He then folded his arms and shook his head. “I’m going in the store.” He said adamantly. The large man let out a huff in protest.
“Daddy.” Sachiko whined as she looked up at him with a frown. “But this has nothing to do with you.”
“It has to do with you.” He reminded her, motioning to the smaller girl in front of him. “and that has everything to do with me.” He nodded his head factually.
Sachiko frowned with a pout to her lips making you chuckle at the two opposing sides. You stood between the both of them, one hand to Sachiko’s shoulder and one to Eijiro’s bicep. “Now, now you two. Let’s be logical about this. Eijiro, you are paying for it so you get to come in the store, but it’s going to be Sachiko making the decisions here and it’s just going to be the two of us picking out things. Okay?” You looked at both Kirishimas. They frowned at each other but nodded their heads. You chuckled before leading father and daughter inside.
Sachiko looked around with wide eyes at all the different fabrics and sizes. Eijiro, however, looked like a sinner in a church. You had never seen the man more nervous. You almost found it amusing to see such a big man so nervous.
You moved with Sachiko to one of the store attendants. She smiled. “Hello, how can I help you?”
You put your hands on Sachiko’s shoulders. Her wide crimson eyes grew wider as she looked at you and then to the woman in front of her. “We’re here for her first bra.”
The woman, her name being Chiyo, she gasped with a bright smile. “Oh, it’s a special day then.” She teased Sachiko making the girl blush a shade of pink. “I’ve got just the selection for you. I’m sure you’ll love them. Now, they do have adjustable straps for if your chest grows bigger and heavier, although I think you might be an A-cup already but let’s measure…” She led the two of you to get measured with a measuring tape and then she tried to guide Sachi on colours that would best go with what type of top or for school or more supportive ones for sport.
You watched proudly, trying to see the little butterfly make decisions on her own (although you did feel special with her coming to you for your opinion). You did notice that on the other side of the shop was Eijiro being swarmed by another attendant and another woman as well. He seemed to have a tense smile as he looked down at the both of them, sweating like- again, a sinner in a church. You couldn’t help but giggle at the sight.
“And you, miss?” You turned to Chiyo who had given Sachiko her items to try on. “You’ve been helping your daughter but you haven’t gotten anything for yourself.”
“My-” You paused. You smiled. “This is more for her than it is for me.” You told her. “But…” You glance over to Eijiro who seemed back against a shopping rack ready to make a bolt for it. “Do you have any lingerie in red?”
You had managed to get yourself a cute set, which you wanted to try on in the changing room. You tried on the lacy blood red bra that admittedly hugged you extremely well. You thought about maybe sending pictures to your large burly boyfriend about this.
Then you heard it. “Y/N.” You heard a loud whisper call out your name in the hallway of the fitting room.
You perked up at the sound. You stuck your head out into the hallway to see Eijiro searching for you. The moment he saw you he quickly dived in with you away from the outside. He put his back to the curtain with a concerned look on his face. You raised an eyebrow and chuckled. “Eiji? What’s going on?”
Eijiro looked at you with a fearful look almost as if he had been through a whirlwind. He opened his mouth to say something but paused. His eyes drifted down to your chest. He watched as surprise filled his face as his eyes were stuck on the way red contrasted your skin.
You chuckled somehow making him drag his eyes away from your chest. “You okay there Eij?”
He nodded his head dumbly. “Well, I am now.” He moved to walk over to you. He stood behind you putting his hands to your hips as he looked at you in the mirror. Something heated and dark in his eyes that you had seen before whenever you were both way too deep in exploring your bodies with your hands to think logically. It made your stomach in knots as he looked down at you. “Oh baby…” He let out lowly, moving a hand up your sides, gently feeling your chest gently before moving to your neck. “If I knew red was your colour, I wouldn’t have hesitated to walk in here. Look at you. Absolutely gorgeous.” He praised.
You couldn’t help but feel… dainty and pretty under his eyes. His large figure behind you showing the difference in size between the both of you. You felt heat move up your neck making you flustered, but you kept his gaze. “Thank you.” Your voice came out smaller than you thought it would.
Eijiro hummed as he looked you over. “Does it come in a set?” You nodded your head. Eijiro tilted his head, a smirk on his face. “Get yourself another one as well.”
“Something red?”
“Of course.” He chuckled lowly, placing a kiss to your head.
You smiled, turning to look up at him. “Thank you…” Your eyes shifted down to his lips first before moving up to his eyes again. “Sir.” You whispered.
You didn’t even get a second to breathe after before Eijiro was on you like white on rice. He had one hand holding the back of your head while the other held your waist, pulling you to be as close as possible. He groaned into the kiss, pulling you impossibly closer to him. Heat filled your abdomen as you could feel the bulge, he had against you. You wished you could feel him fully hard without the stupid pants in the way.
You separated from him with a gasp and a half-lidded stare. Before Eijiro could move to kiss you again,
“Ms Y/N…” Sachiko peaked into the dressing room. She caught eye of her father and glared. “Bad Daddy!” She immediately moved to push him out the room. She swat at his back and arm, painful slaps as she shoved him out the room. “Out! This is no place for you!”
“Ah!” Eijiro was shoved out the room by a mad Sachiko who glared up at him. “I was just helping.”
“No. You wait outside!” She spoke strictly, making it just the two of you. She shook her head in disappointment. “Boys.” That made you laugh.
However, you soon got confronted with some truth that Eijiro was hiding from you after a work event evening that had probably too much alcohol for Eijiro’s own good. The bright side of that is that you got to meet Akari, his oldest sister and man did she intimidate you. She was around the size of Eijiro, maybe a bit shorter but she looked damn right ready to crush you. However, she was a real flirt and super lovely to chat with. She loved making fun of Eijiro more than anything (much to Eijiro’s dismay).
A few pressured shots later and a long evening and you were dragging Eijiro back into his apartment.
“I’M HOME!”
“SH!!! Eijiro, Sachi is sleeping.” You whisper scolded him as you closed the door behind him. It was the first time you had ever seen him drunk or remotely tipsy, but to be fair, he did drink a lot. You figured he was a heavy weight. The large behemoth of a man stumbled around the entry way before being put up straight by you. You gave him a pointed look, but he gave you a hazy drunken smile. He moved to kiss you on your nose, which only brought a chuckle out of you. “Come on, let’s get you to bed.” You carefully moved him towards his bedroom.
The large black haired man kept rambling on about who knows what. “If I was a superhero… I’d want to call myself Red Riot!” He announced nonsensically. “That’s such a manly name? Don’t you think?”
You chuckled and nodded your head. “Yes, it is Eijiro, but you’ve got to keep quiet. Sh.” You reminded him with a finger to your lips.
He put one to his lips. “Shh!” He shushed you back, before giggling.
You rolled your eyes with a smile, opening the door and allowing you both into his room. You led him to bed, allowing him to fall back into the bedsheets. You closed the door slightly as you moved to his bathroom to grab him some painkillers for the morning. You put them on is bedside table before moving back towards him. He seemed rather fascinated with a pillow before you moved to unbutton his shirt.
At first he seemed confused before a shit eating grin went onto his face. He giggled. “Oh, finally, we get to get frisky.” He wiggled his eyebrows as he moved to put his arms around your neck, trying to pull you into a kiss, which you easily ducked.
“No Eijiro.” You scolded as you carefully tried to take his shirt off. “No frisky.” You said sternly earning a pout from him.
“But Y/N…” He whined with a pout. “I’ve been aching for you forever!” He said dramatically throwing his arms out. “I think about you all the time till my cock gets all full and achy. especially in the shower.”
You tried to ignore his drunken confessions, heat moving to your cheeks as you undid his belt, moving it to the nightstand. You moved to take off his shoes and socks too. “No, Eijiro. I’m not taking advantage of you like this, and besides, we can be intimate when you’re ready.” You reminded him.
He hummed as he gave you a sided smile, falling back into bed. “You’re so cool and manly, Y/N.” He said all sing song. “Katsuki was also cool and manly.” You paused at the name. You had never heard that name before. You furrowed your eyebrows as you paused. Eijiro looked sleepy as he put his head to the pillow. “But then Sachi happened… then nothing was cool.” He blinked slowly before turning to look up at you with a tired smile. “But you’re not like that. You love Sachi, like I love Sachi. You wouldn’t want to hurt Sachi like Katsuki wanted to hurt Sachi. You’re so cool and sweet, and beautiful and amazing…” You moved to put him under the blankets in his bed, tucking him in. “I love you~”
You paused at the statement. You turned back to him. You put a hand to his cheek and smiled. You placed a kiss down on his forehead. “I love you too, Eiji.”
“Can you stay?” He asked softly. “I no get nightmares when you here.” His broken speech was cute, but you chuckled. It was late anyways, and there weren’t any more trains or busses at this time probably. Not to your side of town.
You sighed and nodded your head. “Okay.”
“Okay.” You watched him close his eyes as he slipped into sleep fast.
Eijiro let a low groan as he held his head. He moved towards you with a scowl on his face as he sat down at the island table in the kitchen. You smiled at him, preparing breakfast. “I am never drinking ever again.” He boldly proclaimed making you giggle. You moved to slide over to him a cup of water that you had already poured for him and painkillers. He opened his eyes and looked over at the two items. He grumbled. “Thank you.”
You laughed it off. “No problem, Eiji.” You switched off the stoves as you moved to pack away the already washed dishes from the night before.
He took a painkiller as he down the water. He let out a sigh as he put back down the glass. “Where’s Sachi?” he asked, noticing a lack of his daughter around.
“In the shower.” You told him truthfully. With that now in mind, you thought it was the best time to ask him. “Hey Eij,” You asked as you packed away the dishes of last night. “Who’s… who’s Katsuki?”
Eijiro paused at the name. He turned to you with wide eyes, shocked at the question and shocked at the fact that you would be asking it. His heart was beating in his throat. “How… how do you-”
“You mentioned the name last night.” You told him. You watched his eyes squeeze shut as he dropped his head for a moment, letting out a deep sigh. You could tell this wasn’t what he wanted to talk about. “I… Do you-”
“Sachiko’s birth parent.” You heard come out of his mouth before you could finish. “That’s… that’s who he is.” Eijiro looked up at you, slumped. With Sachiko supposedly in the shower, he guessed that he could tell you. Eijiro ran a hand through his hair and sighed. “He… is trans and I knew him through high school and university. He was my best friend and admittedly, I loved him more than I should have. One drunken night together later and… well…”
-Glitch1d
#kirishima x reader#mha x y/n#kirishima eijiro#kirishima eijirou#kirishima eijiro x reader#eijiro x reader#eijiro kirishima#eijiro kirishima x reader#kirishima x you#kirishima x y/n#dilf kirishima#dilf kirishima x reader#dilf eijiro kirishima
105 notes
·
View notes
Text
@lara-cairncross I hope you don’t mind, but I wrote a little fic about your AU :) This would be Donnie showing his brace to his brothers after his leap of faith.
(Also you can definitely read Donnie & Kendra’s vibes as a crush if you want /pos 😂)
===========
“Gentlemen, if you would be so kind,” Donnie motions for his brothers to take a seat on the chairs he clearly positioned near the edge of the branch.
“Dee, what are we doing here?” Leo sighs, exasperated by his brother’s dramatics, “You know I love spending time with you guys, but I actually have deliveries to make today.”
Raph throws an arm over Leo’s shoulders, “Pssh, relax Leo, you’re fast enough to make it there in time.”
“Ok I know you’re teasing me,” Leo shoots his brother a side eye, before crossing his arms over his chest in defiance, “but I could definitely make it there and back. With time to spare.”
Mikey laughs while Raph just sighs and they all take their seats.
They’re fairly high up in the Pixie Dust Tree, in an area Leo knows not many fairies fly past. It’s starting to make him a little concerned that his jokes about Donnie murdering Kendra one day aren’t jokes anymore.
His brother woke them up early this morning, telling them that he had something to show them, but refusing to answer what it actually is. He also lugged a massive bag with him all the way here, but didn’t let any of them help with it. And the chairs being up here already proves that Donnie has clearly planned this out. It’s really making Leo believe that this is the last he’s ever going to see of Kendra.
“Yes, yes we all know Leon is fast,” Donnie bats the statement away and turns to his bag, “now if I can bring your attention to why I've brought you here today.”
“Which you still haven't explained, by the way,” Mikey grouches, not quite his sunny self in the dim light of the morning.
Donnie grins in a mischievous way, “All part of the surprise, dear Angelo! Now I need you all to close your eyes.”
Leo rolls his eyes, but closes them anyway, knowing that if he complains they’ll just spend longer up here anyway. “Donald, if you did something to Kendra, just tell us, it’ll make hiding the body easier.”
Mikey snickers beside him.
“I– Wha– No! I haven't done anything to Kendra. Not yet anyway,” Donnie moves on quickly, “I made something and you’re going to like it. Trust me.”
Now, most fairies in the Hidden Hollow are under the impression that Donnie doesn’t do feelings, an achieved product of his so called “Emotionless Bad-Boy Image”. But Leo can hear the excitement in his brother’s voice. He’s fiddling with something in the bag, and the suspense is honestly starting to have an effect on Leo. He’s getting excited too.
“And… open!”
He opens his eyes (Still semi prepared to see Kendra trapped in some kind of way) and is a little confused by what he’s presented with. Donnie is standing near the edge of the branch. His wings, usually down, are spread proudly on either side of him. The tattered one is covered in something Leo can’t quite make out.
Donnie shoots them a smile, and Leo hears a whisper that sounds like “Leap of faith,” and then the tinker fairy drops backwards off the branch and out of sight.
“DONNIE!!” Mikey screams, and Raph leaps out of his chair but Leo, Leo just dives. There's no thoughts about windspeed, hawks, humidity or any of the other things Leo normally has to consider when he flies. There’s no thoughts about how stupid his genius of a brother is, or about how if he isn’t fast enough Donnie might—. No, there is simply the need to move.
And move he does.
He drops like a stone from the height of the Tree, colours blurring past him as he streaks after his brother. His heart is pounding wildly, filled with shock and dread, urging himself to go faster, faster. He thinks he has tears in his eyes, but he tells himself that it’s just from flying at this speed.
He actually moves so fast he overshoots Donnie, who is very safely fluttering in the air.
“Donnie?” Leo rights himself immediately and shoots back up towards his brother. “Donnie! Haha!!” He zips a quick circle around his brother, trying to get his racing heart to calm down. He can see the thing on Donnie’s wing now. It’s a brace. The contraption covering his tattered wing is so delicate, clearly made by Donnie himself. Thin strips reach up the wing, acting as a scaffold for the pieces to stretch across, giving Donnie enough surface area to generate lift. He might not be into science like his brother, but he knows a thing or two about flying, and Donnie’s design is genius.
He’s so relieved it takes him a second to realise that they are still very much hovering above the ground which means, “Holy shit! You're flying!!”
He’s giddy with excitement, this is all he’s ever wanted for Donnie! Leo grabs him by the hands, and spins them in the air with joy. Donnie can clearly sense what Leo’s about to do because he panics and yells, “Nardo wait!” but it’s too late, because Leo tosses him upwards and crashes into him with a hug.
“Hahaha! This is amazing!”
“Ohmigosh! Donnie’s flying!”
Two more sets of arms encircle them. Their other brothers have caught up and Leo can feel in the tightness of his hug how Raph’s panic morphs into shock and then amazement.
“Yes, yes I can fly. Hurrah,” Donnie pats the back of Raph’s shoulder, “Although my wings are still delicate so…”
They all immediately release Donnie. And then Raph whacks him on the back of the head.
“You idiot! What were you thinking! You gave Raph a heart attack!”
“Well I’ve done the jump before so I know the brace works–”
“You WHAT?”
“ –I just needed to show you guys too.”
“Yeah but you could’ve warned us Dee.” Mikey pokes him in the shoulder, a hint of Doctor Delicate Touch peeking through.
Donnie shoots him a cheeky grin, “Where’s the fun in that?”
Leo’s amazed. He’s still chuckling. Of course Donnie would build himself a way to fly. Something as silly as a tattered wing was never going to stop him. It was only a matter of time.
========
Also not seen:
Donnie pretty much immediately sagging, because his wings aren’t used to flying for extended periods yet, and Raph hoisting him onto his shoulders to fly them back to the tree.
========
Anyways hope you enjoyed! Go give Lara’s AU a look. It’s amazing 🤩
69 notes
·
View notes
Text
A Quiet Love
Sorry for the lack of updates. Been very busy with schoolwork and fell sick today. Still, here's my latest need to cuddle with Astarion.
Oh I also went to Anime Impulse at Seattle and gosh that was fun. Bought an Astarion print and a standee to start my Astarion shrine in my cupboard, bought a wooden magnet carving of a rly cute egg sushi, bought some stuff for my friends back home too.
Summary: You have a nightmare and Astarion chases it away in his own way.
Ragged breaths tear through you as you run through the trees, clutching your bleeding side with one hand and wiping away your sweat with the other. You can hear the shouts of your pursuers, hear the thundering hooves of the horses some of them are riding, all of which spur your feet onwards in spite of the screams from your muscles.
Your head spins and you nearly fall over. You won’t last long in this chase, they will catch and torture you before executing you in front of the whole town, exactly as the oracle had predicted. Still, if that is your destiny, you’re not about to just roll over and let them have you. If they want you, they are going to have to work for it.
You stumble in a zigzag pattern, darting in and out of your pursuers’ sight and hear their hollers of frustration, causing you to grin. Your pursuers are terrible at their job if they can’t even catch a wounded target. You nearly laugh out loud, stopped only by the blood that bubbles up your throat when you try.
Even so, they inevitably catch up to you. With how your vision keeps giving way, there is no other outcome, but you continue to be defiant, resisting their capture even as the black spots worm their way in.
“Come on, scared of injured prey?” You cough, sending a bloody grin their way. Your pursuers move closer, encircling you but they maintain their distance, much to your amusement. You can feel your lifeblood leaving your body, you won’t last much longer and yet they’re still so afraid of you.
Your fingers curl, ready to fight as hard as you can before they take you when a fireball incinerates half the pursuers, leaving nothing but blackened ash. A war cry follows suit, revealing a tiefling with one horn and a githyanki warrior charging into the fray swinging their weapons which takes out most of the remaining pursuers.
Your gaze flicks about the battlefield, looking for a particular pale elf but you don’t see him amidst the chaos of it all. One of your remaining pursuers, however, spots you and moves in from behind, gladius primed to strike but a dagger plunges into his neck before he gets the chance.
“You really need to watch your back more, my love. I can’t watch it for you forever.”
Your eyes light up when you see who it is, the urge to run over and jump into his arms tugging at your heart but all you can manage is a hasty stumble in his direction, a silent yelp leaving your lips as gravity pulls your body downwards, straight at the ground.
“Falling for me again?” A pair of cold arms wrap themselves around you, stopping your descent. You heave a relieved sigh, closing your eyes as you lean into the cooling embrace of your vampire lover, feeling your body give out without an adrenaline high to sustain it anymore.
“I will always fall for you,” you murmur tiredly. You feel your body sag against his, feel his panic as he realises you’re bleeding out all over the ground. His voice rises a pitch, sharp fingernails digging ever so slightly into your flesh and you want to comfort him, reassure him that you’re not going anywhere but your muscles refuse to move and you can’t do anything about it.
“Darling, stay with me. As tasty as you look leaking blood, you’re leaking too much blood.” He holds you close, trying to staunch the bleeding with one hand while the other haphazardly rummages through the bag for a healing potion.
“Too…much…? I thought…you’d…appreciate it…” You’re getting dizzier and dizzier, with more of your vision fading to black. His red eyes pierce the veil that’s being drawn over your eyes, willing you to stay awake but the pull of the void is too strong, you can’t hold on anymore.
“Well, you see love…love? Love!”
And the world turns black.
You wake up with a start, chest heaving and sweat running down your back.
A nightmare. A rather vivid one at that.
You pinch the bridge of your nose, willing your thundering heart to calm down before it can wake the trancing vampire next to you but his movements suggest that he has already woken up.
“Nightmare?” He murmurs quietly, his tone a far cry from his usual way of speaking.
“Hrm,” you reply, blood pounding in your ears. The world refocuses, showing you the vampire who is gazing at you with such concern in his eyes, his eyebrows creased in worry.
“I’m alright, Star. Just need to…get a breath of fresh air,” you wave him off. “Sorry for interrupting your trance.”
“I was about to head off for a hunt.” He pauses for a moment. “Would you like to come along, my dear?”
“That…sounds nice.” You rub your eyes, feeling his hand brush against yours. Giving his hand a squeeze, you push yourself up, wiping the night’s terrors away and step out into the cool fresh air, taking a deep breath. You hear him stop just behind you, his shoulder brushing against yours and you take his hand once more.
“I just need you,” you whisper, the words meant only for his ears. He nods, pressing closer to you and swallows the honeyed words that almost fall from his lips out of habit. What you need now is him, not the words his tongue can form, not the services he can provide.
You just need him.
It’s not something anyone else can provide, it’s something unique to him and something he’s comfortable with providing. If all you want is for him to sit by your side, he will happily do just that.
Astarion lets you lead the way, sitting on the steps next to you with a clear view of the city. He wants to know what your nightmare was about so that he can reassure you better, but watching you take in the city’s night lights with quiet awe, he decides that dredging up the past can wait and patiently sits next to you, exactly like he promised. He takes your hand, relishing in the way your fingers automatically curl around his hand.
“I’m right here, my love.” he says for no other reason than he wants to say it. You nod, squeezing his hand before resting your head on his shoulder, letting out a deep breath.
“Thank you,” you whisper. The quiet night beckons the words from your lips, the words you have yet to say to him and mean it with all your heart. You feel him slip an arm around your waist, pulling you closer and feel his lips ghost over your hair.
“I love you.”
#baldur's gate 3#bg3#astarion bg3#baldurs gate astarion#astarion romance#astarion x durge#astarion x reader#astarion x tav#astarion x you#astarion ancunin#astarion#tavstarion#durgestarion
124 notes
·
View notes
Note
hello! I’m so happy to see more wind breaker content it feeds my fan girl soul. may I request suo hayato sleeping headcanons please? a million thanks if you do 🫶
-> sleeping angel | 708 words. gn!reader, really just fluffy nonsense.
author’s notes: i feel like this guy just doesn’t sleep, and he’s not a napper, so when he does nap/sleep, that mf is EXHAUSTED. it’s tiring telling white lies every day :/ LMAO, enjoy!
I have a strong feeling that Suo is not a big sleeper. He doesn’t really seem to get tired, and he’s always on alert even though he makes you seem like he’s not. It’s so hard to creep around him, because he’ll pop up with a smile on his face and a “where you going, darling?” falling from his lips.
He does sleep with you at night, of course, but you’ve noticed he spends more time staring up at the ceiling instead of curling up with you and falling asleep. His brain gears moving are so loud for you that you end up barely sleeping, too worried about him and what he could possibly be thinking about. You don’t comment on it at first, as its really not your place, but as your relationship gets more serious, you can’t help but ask.
“Why don’t you sleep with me at night?” you blurt out over dinner once. The silence that follows has your face reddening in embarrassment, looking down at your food to avoid Suo's gaze. When you do look back up, he’s staring at you with an appreciation that makes your heart flutter. He closes his eyes with a smile, his head slightly tilting to the side. “How did you notice?” he asks, and you sigh, your fork clinking against the plate as you lean back, arms folding across your chest. You didn’t want to tell him this, but he’s driven you to it, and you need to be honest; your sleep is being affected. “I can’t sleep with you thinking so loudly,” you say, gently, as if worried he’ll snap at you, “and I want to know what’s wrong. You know, so I can help you. It’s okay to ask, Suo.”
His eyes go wide, then, and the smile drops to an expression of shock. It’s almost like he didn’t know that you were up all those nights, because you hid it so well. That, or he was too busy thinking about himself, as usual. “I’m sorry,” he says, reaching across the table and grabbing your hand, “I just don’t sleep very well. I get nightmares and I don’t want to wake you up.” He looks genuinely upset that he’s wrecked your sleeping schedule, and that expression is something you can’t deny. You sigh, squeezing his hand. “Alright. But you need to start sleeping. I don’t care if you have nightmares, I’ll help you through them. I’m here to help you, okay? Please don’t forget that.”
His nightmares, you discover, are horrendous. He’s constantly sweating, cursing under his breath, twitching and squirming; but you’d rather him go through this than not sleep at all. You often curl around him, petting his hair and kissing his forehead, whispering sweet nothings into his ear. You know he can’t really hear you, but feeling him relax into you, eventually, is more rewarding than anything else. He doesn’t talk about the subject of them, and you don’t need to know; he’ll tell you when he wants to.
Now that he’s sleeping better with you, his nightmares not occurring every night the longer you snuggle with him and take care of him, he doesn’t nap much anymore. Although, sometimes you’ll find him on the couch, his phone at risk of falling out of his hand, a silly video of Sakura and Nirei playing on it. His gentle breaths fan against the hair falling into his face, and you brush it out of the way as you press a kiss to his forehead. He’ll smile in his sleep, too; he knows it’s you.
You have so many photos of him sleeping in odd positions when he does end up taking a nap; one of them is him curled up in a chair like a cat, another is him spread-eagled across the couch leaving a fraction of space for you to sit to watch a movie, and yet another is him sleeping on a bus with you, cheek pressed against the window, eyelashes flat against his cheeks. You rotate them with your phone home screen wallpaper; the Furin boys eventually take notice, but say nothing. Suo would have their heads if they did; you are his exception.
divider credit: @/benkeibear
networks: @enchantedforest-network
disclaimer: DO NOT copy or repost my works for any reason. translations are acceptable, but please ask for permission first!
© togamest 2023-2024
#suou hayato x reader#hayato suou x reader#wind breaker x reader#wind breaker headcanons#ari's autographs#ari's headcanons#ari's got mail!#Anonymous#thanks for comin by!!!
91 notes
·
View notes
Text
Leave Off Your Wandering pt. 4: Winter
Fandom: The Last of Us (TV)/ Joel Miller
Pairing: Joel Miller x f!reader
Reader: Adult female. Old enough to have been an adult on Outbreak Day. Wyoming born and bred. Sheep farmer, easy-going but confident and self-sufficient. Likes to sing, not a great cook. Childhood friend of Maria. No other physical descriptors; no use of y/n.
Rating: Mature.
Warnings: Mentions of sex but nothing explicit. Canon-typical violence, bodily harm, death, (blood, broken bones, knife wounds, shooting, blunt force) and PTSD.
Summary: Revenge comes calling and you work though it as a family.
A/N: Series set after season 1 and then diverges. Does not acknowledge the existence of further plot/seasons, although it does use some characters/elements from the second game.
I’m so sorry it’s taken this long to get to winter. This one was difficult for me to face writing for reasons that may be made clear. But it was very rewarding. <3
The air is thin and cold this morning, takes your breath and makes a show of it as you quickstep it down to the stables. The sun is just starting to make the frost sparkle and no doubt Goldie will be using up the rest of the firewood at the Roost today.
Good thing you have a Joel who’s ready to chop more.
Although he’s also a Joel that’s forgotten his tea, the “stuff with the things in it” that Willa gave him for the stiffness in his knees. With this cold he’s going to want it today on patrol and the last thing you think you can stand is the tug in your heart when he comes home complaining of the cold and the ache and you sitting warm and cozy with his thermos on the counter when you had the legs to trot it on out to him.
It’s a relief to round the corner and find the patrol party still at the stable gate, Tommy helping one of the teens with their rifle strap, and Joel waiting on horseback, weaving his gloved fingers together, packing them down at the valleys to get his hands all the way in.
He’d laid one of those hands on your cheek this morning. Gentle. First thing you saw when you opened your eyes. Like most mornings now. His thumb rounding the rim of your cheek so he could lean in and take a good long drink of a kiss.
He likes it that way…soft, slow. Likes to pull you in as close as he can, twist his forehead into your temple when he hits his peak, jaw clenched in agonized pleasure, kisses along your jawline when you find yours, his eyes half-lidded and watching you in a hazy awe. He’s quiet but thorough, completely present like he can’t believe he’s got this little slice of warmth, sighs a hushed curse in your ear and calls you sweetheart in the same breath, and then sleeps like a baby the whole night through.
He doesn’t like to talk about the past much, but listening’s your specialty and it comes out in bits and pieces, stuck between the little he does say. You come to understand that he very rarely got to be very close with anyone while Sarah was growing up. There were the years when everything was a nightmare. Then there was Tess and she brought him out of that, thank goodness. But it took time. And there was also denial and survival and means to their ends. There might indeed have been strong love there. But you have the feeling he’s not had this–or anything like it–for a long, long time.
So if he wants it soft and slow, then who are you to deny him?
Maybe it shouldn’t be so surprising that it was him who pulled you in a little closer.
“What if you didn’t move in with Tommy and Maria this winter?” He’d lingered the morning after Christmas, leaning one shoulder against the frame of your bedroom door, savoring the show of you getting dressed for the day.
“And waste the fuel? Why? So we can cuddle up now and then without your brother down the hall? You keep me plenty warm, Joel Miller, but I’m not going to heat this whole house just for me and your more-than-casual visits. Everyone’s got a responsibility here to conserve in the winter. This is how I do my part. And besides,” you purred as he stepped in to button up your flannel for you, freeing up your fingers so they could run through his curls, “I know where you live and your bed’s good as mine.”
“You seem to like it there well enough.”
“I do.” His beard was growing in all but a patch on his jaw that was now your right to kiss.
“Well I was thinkin’ we just make it ours for the winter.”
His hands had circled your hips and his words had stopped your heart, but there was little for to say with his lips pressed against yours.
So mornings often started as they did today, waking to find Joel beside you, roused because you can feel him watching you with that little half smile that reveals the crack in his weary heart where the light shines through. Who needs spring to come with sunshine like that to turn to? Now there are family breakfasts with Ellie and cozy days knitting in the company of Maria and Riley and then warm nights with Joel on one of those pillowtopped mattresses that were all the rage before the outbreak…the ones that are great when you have a stiff back, but even better because the springs don’t squeak…
“Aw dammit,” Joel says when he sees you nearing the stables with the thermos, “Knew I forgot something.”
“Two somethings,” you say pointing to his bare head and passing your hat up to him in the saddle. “Your ears are already bright red. Here. Take my hat.”
“This’s Ellie’s.”
“Huh. Guess I just grabbed one on my way out. Oops. Be a man. Wear a pompom.”
He pulls it down over his ears and smiles. “Matches my scarf.”
You’d had a small batch of deep red wool you’d managed to squeak a hat and scarf out of and gifting the hat to Ellie around Christmas, but the scarf went to Joel. He may not want anyone to think of him as sentimental, but it was worth your while to make it easy on him by giving him something that was also practical. Even if he had his jacket zipped up all the way, it was always there, tucked around his neck; he may leave his ears to the elements but he never went anywhere without that scarf.
The line of horses start making their way toward the Jackson gates and you squeeze Joel’s shin before stepping out of the way, letting him and his horse follow the group. He simply lets a gloved finger glance your cheek as he passes by.
All the way out here on this side of the apocalypse and humans still have a million variations on saying “I love having you around and I’d like to keep it that way.”
________
“Ellie’s more than welcome around here if you and Joel don’t want to leave her home alone.”
Maria’s lightly bouncing a wet-faced and blubbering Riley on her lap, trying to tempt him with a frozen carrot for his teething. He has tommy’s curls and they sproing with every boing.
“Nah, she wants to come out. We’ll be dividing the ewes and driving part of the flock into the old town for the rest of the overwinter and she wants to see how it's done. Should see it, if she thinks she’ll be entering the rotation at any point. Speaking of,” you grunt, leaning down to gather your knitting basket and gather your things, “I promised I’d meet her after school. She’s gotten into collecting cassette tapes and the commissary says she’s hit her quota on goods this week. Gonna give up a couple credits so she can discover the wonders of Joan Jett and the Beastie Boys.”
“That’s throwing gas on the fire. She pick those out herself?”
“Nope. My points, my choice. And I say that girl needs to fight for her right to party and put another dime in the jukebox, baby.”
Maria rolls her eyes, chuckles, goes light on the sarcasm. “You’re the coolest auntie.”
“Don’t I know it,” you laugh, tying up your boots.
“Joel’s gonna just love that.”
Leaning in to bop a quick kiss to Riley’s head, you give Maria a crazed grin. “So much.”
Ten minutes later, Ellie has her doubts, holding up a cassette at the commissary. “But there’s a dinosaur on this one! How can it not be great?”
“Listen, missy. I’m not saying Dinosaur Jr. doesn’t have a place in music history, but I’m telling you that you’re likely to be disappointed. Trust me. Just this once.”
Ellie makes a face but you glance past it, distracted by what you see through the window behind her. Following your focus, she turns to look too. “Who’re they?”
All of the patrol horses coming back in have two people on them–a member of the party, and a stranger. And all the strangers can’t be more than teenagers.
“Dunno, but it looks like you’re about to get some new classmates. I’ll sign these out. You go ahead and make a good first impression.”
“You’re just sending me out there because you know if they’re infected, I can’t catch it.”
“If they were infected, they wouldn’t be on those horses or inside those gates. I’m sending you out there because you have a way of reading people. Go.”
Something in that puts a gasp in her throat and a sparkle in her eye and her ponytail whips behind her as she goes, striving to live up to the compliment.
But really, you just want half a minute to take a good look at the kids without Ellie asking questions. They’re all scrawny and filthy. Backpacks. Been traveling and living rough for a while now. Where’d they come from? What’s their story? Not an adult among them. How have they survived? You’d swear something feels off, but that’s the world now. Can’t be too careful. Everything seems off all the time.
Question is, off by how much?
You find Joel in the group; he’s the only one riding with a kid in front of him rather than hanging on behind. And once he gets down off the horse and reaches up to help his passenger down, you can see why.
She’s pregnant.
Shit. She’s what, fifteen? Sixteen?
Shit.
“There’s a house up near mine has good plumbing turned on.” Tommy’s speaking over his shoulder to the small group and leading his horse to the stable door as you come out of the commissary. “We’ll get you all washed up and fed. There’s at least two beds there and some other furniture fit to sleep on if it makes you comfortable to stay together. Give me a minute to put Lady away here and we’ll walk on up together. Joel? A word?”
Handing off the pregnant girl’s backpack to her, Joel takes the reins of his horse and follows his brother inside, leaving the newcomers to look around them and take in the town.
All but one. A girl with hair that’s neither light brown or dark blonde, somewhere in between. Your mother would have called it dirty dishwater blonde and you always thought that was rude. But your mother also would have said the girl had a hatchet of a face with a strong jaw like that. And it’s that girl whose head whips around the second she heard Joel’s name, quickly scanning the patrol to ascertain who belonged to it, and stands watching the stable door in thought long after the Miller brothers were gone.
Was Joel her father’s name? Her brother’s? Is it hers or close to hers? Is she a Jo or Joelle?
“Abby. Hey,” a boy calls and she turns. “Mel should get a bed and we can share. Manny and Nora can share too…if you’re okay with taking a couch.”
“Fine,” Abby says. Her eyes and mouth all unmoving lines.
“Hey. Welcome to Jackson. I’m Ellie.” Your starling jams her hands in her pockets as all the new eyes turn her way. “It looks like you’ve been wandering. Where you coming from?”
The boy who spoke before blinks and opens his mouth to say something, hesitates. You’d take him for the leader up until the moment Abby speaks for him.
“West of here. QZ. Seattle.”
“Oh. Cool,” says Ellie with a bounce to her nod. Easy. Instantly welcoming. “I came out of Boston.”
Seattle QZ. The same one your dead husband and his sister came from. Not a good place. Warring factions and nothing but oppression and disease, last you heard. Good that they got out. They’re gonna need to be de-loused.
But Seattle’s also much harder than most zones to break free of. You’ve been told the Western Liberation Front makes FEDRA look like a bucket of clowns.
“Seattle?” Now it’s your turn to pull focus from the group. “We’ve had refugees from there before. You really get out of there in one group like this? With no grown ups?”
Abby rips her eyes away from Ellie. “It’s a long story,” she says, shutting the questioning down.
There’s a moment that hangs between you and that stinks faintly of threat, but is mostly just the smell of feral kids. Tension breaks as the men emerge from the stable.
“We all ready?” Tommy says, making his way down the road and waving a hand for them to follow. “New home’s this way.”
Ellie starts to fall in with the group and you pull her back in close, speak low. “Go with them if you want, but keep your distance.”
“What? Why?”
“These are your first refugees. You’ll learn that they sometimes bring things with ‘em.”
Her face screws into a question mark. “What things?”
“Fleas. Lice. Viruses. Just give ‘em some space for a while.”
After the quickest flash of disgust, Ellie’s tried and true compassion kicks in and she gives an understanding nod as she turns to go, tape cassettes clattering in her jacket pocket.
You keep watching her even as you speak to the owner of the hand snaking around your waist. “Where’d you find them?”
“Up at the old crossing. They were under attack.”
“Jesus.”
“Nope. Infected.”
“Been a while since we’ve seen any of those stumble through here.”
“Infected? Or the kids.”
Turning to him in exasperation you look him over. “Both. And the same goes for you as for Ellie, Foxy. Let’s take you home and wash that scarf and hat. Run a fine-toothed comb through that hair just to make sure.”
“I’m sure it’s fine,” he says, stopping when he catches your zero-temperature glare. If it’s something else you love about Joel, he recognizes when something’s important to you and answers a lady with composure and respect. “Yes, ma’am.”
____
“You couldn’t have found her some Cash or Fleetwood Mac or something?”Joel grumbles into the fireplace as he places another log on the coal bed and moves the poker around like he’s doing something.
Ellie sits on a blanket near the fire, reading a comic book, headphones on, Joan Jett’s grinding guitar bleeding out into the otherwise quiet living room. With his face turned to the fire and Ellie facing away from you, she most likely can’t hear the conversation that’s happening around her if you keep your voices low.
“You’re just jealous that she asked me to pick something out instead of you,” you smile on the couch, picking up your feet and swinging them into his lap as he sits down beside you. “80’s rock is good for her spiky little soul.”
“80’s means trouble,” he counters, considering her as his hands absently squeeze and rub at your feet.
You go back to your book. Seemingly anyway. It’s easy to steal observing glances from where you are. The thoughtful concern he has for Ellie. You can see him looking over the wood in the hopper and calculating how many days of fuel he has before you all head out to the Roost. A twist of a lip tells you he’s realized he might be a day short and needs to chop more. His gaze drops to his lap as he lightly massages your feet–just running his hands along their contours, pressing a thumb in here and there to tenderize a muscle. The firelight loves him, plays at the edges of his curls, slides down his nose, kisses the purse of his lips.
You jump as he slides a tickling fingertip up the sole of one foot. “Hey!”
“What you get for staring.”
“I wasn’t staring at you, I was reading.”
“Must be pretty small print you don’t turn a page for five minutes.”
Taking off your readers and closing the book, you sit up and deposit them on the coffee table. From here it’s easy to scoot up to him and lean an elbow on the couch back. “What’s got you so thinky tonight, hmm? You look like you’ve got your worry pants on.” There’s a curl right behind his ear that’s so easy to twirl in your fingers and you indulge. You’ve found a little touch helps him open up.
“I can’t help thinking about those kids, thinkin’ they could just wander out in the world like that. If it weren’t for us hearing the runners….” He goes quiet a minute and you let him, his gaze haunting Ellie’s direction but living somewhere in the past. “They gotta be somebody’s kids. I can’t believe Seattle’s so bad they just let ‘em run wild…let ‘em run away from the best you got for ‘em.”
A faint guitar blares from Ellie’s headphones as she flips a page, purses her lips, absently nods along.
“Yeah, well teenagers rebel, Foxy. That’s what they do.”
“No,” he says, softly, resolutely, a tick of his jaw. “Not all of ‘em. Not if they’re loved. And fiercely. And I don’t know a love that isn’t fierce.”
It’s the look on his face that makes you believe him.
Love isn’t a word that Joel bandies about. It’s easy to see it work in him. The way he tells Ellie no when she wants to do something reckless but promises her something just as exciting, going to any length to make her smile. The way he holds Riley’s head in the crook of his arm, his other hand reflexively coming out in defense if anyone gets too near the baby’s soft spot. The way he shoves his brother with a laugh when Tommy picks on him or how he helps Maria to her feet when she’s been on the floor too long, even if she says she doesn’t need it.
The way he… with you he…
His hands work at your feet again. He understands the minute levels of his strength, knows how firm to go without bringing pain.
With you, it’s the way he rolls over and shows you his soft places, invites you in to be a part of it.
Not really what you’d call fierce. Does that mean he doesn’t–
“Is a cherry bomb like a little bomb or a big bomb?” Ellie asks, an earpad pulled away from her ear and spilling Cherie Currie’s stuttered chorus.
“It’s a little one. A firework. But it packs a big punch. It’ll take your fingers off. Hello, world, I’m your wild girl, I’m your ch-ch-ch-ch-ch-ch-ch-ch cherry bomb,” you sing, pushing your foot against Joel’s thigh with every beat.
“Alright, that’s it,” he says, wrapping a big hand around your ankle to secure it. “Ellie, run on up and get my guitar. Lemme teach you a better song.”
In the minute it takes for her to come back, Joel foregoes softness for force, tickling relentlessly, almost ending up with a foot in his face with how much you squirm.
___
Church isn’t really your thing, never was. You have your own way of listening to the beauty of the earth that doesn’t mean sacrificing a morning sleeping in to listen to lessons you’ve already learned and hold true.
But today you’ve come to the after-brunch curious to welcome the new residents and managed to show up a little early. So you’re standing in the back of the mess hall with Maria and Riley, waiting for the final hymn to end, for the preacher to call an end to the service and a beginning to the meal.
Maria leans in and murmurs in your ear as the final chorus comes. “Tommy and the crew are working on one of those bigger houses with the vaulted ceilings in the new district so the church can have its own building.”
“They’re not gonna like having to walk over there.”
She shrugs, adjusts Riley’s teething toy and bounces him up a notch. “Might cause some of them to move over there. Thin out the density. Easier on the power grid. We do have five new residents.”
You watch as one of the new boys–Owen–helps the pregnant Mel to her feet. “Soon to be six.”
Once the kitchen starts serving, Owen and Mel find their way over to your table, eager to meet Riley and ask Maria all kinds of questions about childbirth and your friend finds herself in a mentoring role she didn’t ask for. She’s not opposed to being helpful, just lets her judgment slide through on the whole babies having babies thing which completely flies over the kids’ heads.
They’re good enough kids, but something tastes a little sour when Owen tries to include you in the conversation.
“What about you? You and…is his name Joel? You gonna have any kids?”
It’s a rude question. He’s earned your side eye and he knows it, but smiles through it, playing innocent.
“Already got one. One’s enough,” you laugh, sly, chewing through some boiled oats and letting him know you’re gonna let that one slide.
“Oh, yeah, right. Ellie, right?” he asks, with a flick of his eyes to a table behind you. Turning, you find Abby at a table with some other residents and when you turn back it’s with a dry expression that tells him he’s worn out his turns at beating the bush and should be out with it.
“We just were wondering if she’d show us around,” Mel explains. “She’s the only one of the children here who will talk to us.”
You snort. “Don’t let Ellie hear you call her a child. She’s short for her age, but she’s not much younger than you. She likes people, but that won’t win you any points.”
“And don’t worry about the other kids,” Maria takes over, shooting you a look. “They’ll come around. A lot of them were born here and they don’t see a ton of new people.”
“Are they not coming to the brunch today?” Owen asks.
“Who?”
“Ellie and Joel.”
Shaking your head, you swallow your latest bite. “Joel and Tommy are off getting some work done in the new sector and Ellie would bite my face off if I woke her up before high noon on a weekend. But she knows where you’re staying. I’ll send her around to you once she’s up and acting like a whole human.”
You’re about to change the subject and ask them a few questions of your own but Riley starts fussing and Mel asks to hold him and the whole baby talk starts up again.
When you look over your shoulder, Abby is gone from the table. Left her dish for someone else to clean up.
There’s a thought creeps in that maybe Ellie can teach them all some manners. And then you remember the mouth on your starling and smile.
____
“And Owen showed me some of his drawings and they’re so amazing. He’s like a fucking Picasso or something. He says he’ll give me lessons if I can get Mr. Scowlface here to take him out hunting. Says he misses hunting deer with his dad. And Abby wants to go too. I told her how you taught me to use a shotgun and she seemed really interested to learn. She might want to join the patrols some day. But I told them not this week since we’re going out to the Meadow and they all had questions about that. Abby especially–”
Ellie has a remarkable talent for chewing and talking at the same time. She catches a piece of apple that escapes her mouth, slurping it off the back of her hand where it landed, then downs the rest of the milk and wipes her mouth with the cuff of her sweater, leaving you to negate your silent praise of her manners from earlier in the week and giving you a break in the chatter to speak.
“Well, you’re a little young to be recruiting your own Roostlings, but if Abby or any of the others want to come out sometime and see what the fuss is about, they’re welcome. I’d rather them wait until spring though, or at least until we get the whole of the flock back from the deep winter holding grounds. Chickadee’s taking up the caboose on that.”
As you push the carafe of chicory coffee toward Joel and clear the breakfast plates, Ellie snatches the last hunk of bread you left on yours, shaking her head. “Abby’s afraid of heights. Didn’t even have time to tell her about the Roost being up on stilts. What’s a caboose?”
Joel scoffs. “Last car on a train.” He takes a long, loud drag of his coffee, pouring on the annoyance to get a glare out of the girl and succeeds. “Well, if she don’t like heights, she’s not going to enjoy learning patrol duty either, not with the watchtowers and the mountain trails. And don’t go promising services you can’t guarantee. I’m not a scout leader.”
“What’s a scout leader?”
“Someone with a lot more patience than me. Get.”
Taking up her backpack, Ellie makes her way to the front vestibule to pull on her gear.
“Don’t forget your hat and scarf!” You call to her, but smile at Joel as you perch your butt against the table and tuck a little curl behind his ear. He’ll ask you to cut it soon. And you’ll put it off for as long as possible.Tickles, he'll say. I know, you'll say.
“Thanks, Gramma Betty!” she calls back and pulls the door shut behind her as Joel lays a warm hand on your outer thigh.
“What’er you getting up to today?” he asks.
You shrug. “I’m in carding mode. Got a whole bag of washed fleece needs combing. I’d ask you what you’re up to, but I assume you and Tommy are gonna be tearing down some poor old house.”
There’s a moment where he squints, thiinking. His thumb tracing the outer seam of your jeans.
“I want you to come with me. Got something to show you.”
“Really. Well I like the sound of that. I could use a little walk in the bitter cold with a mystery at the end of it. Gonna have to go pull on a heavier sweater though. Might need to take this one off first. You wanna come watch?”
There’s a knock at the front. Tommy. The door opening.
Joel only grins fondly and pats your thigh, sending you off, before pushing the chair back from the table and separating himself from his coffee mug. “I’ll catch the later show. ‘Specially if it calls for audience participation.”
Five minutes later, bundled and booted, the three of you head out toward the new section, Joel with his scarf tucked in tight and hat pulled down low, and Tommy with a set forced upon him because you’re quickly becoming the winter clothing police around here.
It’s not a long walk. Jackson was never more than a few miles wide and this is just the first expansion of the wall. You’ve wandered over during the construction crew’s activities enough to know the way without being led, but what you’re expecting is for Joel to lead you away from the furthest street, away from the beautiful A-frame house so neatly repaired along with its pretty neighbors and up the street with Tommy to the next clutch of houses they’ve been working on.
But instead, Joel tells his brother he’ll be along in a minute, and Tommy smiles knowingly as he continues on, leaving the two of you in the walkway up to the pretty A-frame that’s so much like the Roost’s bigger sister.
“You know what today is?” Joel asks, hands in pockets, squinting up at the peaked roof.
“Friday?”
“Probably,” he says, shifting focus to his boots. “I was thinking more holiday-wise.”
The air’s particularly crisp today, hitches in your lungs as you take each mental step and catch up with him.
February 14. Valentine’s.
As your mouth drops open, he jerks his chin at the house. “You like this one, right?”
“What…what are you….Joel?”
There’s a cringe that belies his confidence, maybe a tinge of regret. “I just figured we were gettin’ along so well, that maybe you’d… It was just an idea–”
He can’t even look you in the eye until you yank his hand awkwardly out of his pocket and wrap your gloved hand around his. He seems almost shocked to see your tears welling up–true, half from the cold–but he’s also relieved. Big breath in, big breath out. That must have been the hard part.
Words aren’t Joel’s way. This is how he tells you just how deep his feelings go. You know he’s had time to imagine with every window replaced, every floorboard leveled out, every load bearing wall reinforced, just which family was going to get to live in this house and what kind of life they might make in it.
What kind of life you might make together here.
So you take his lead and say only what’s necessary, as steadily as you’re able.
“Take me inside.”
His sheepish grin confirms that it was exactly what he’d hoped to hear.
The interior’s simple, but gorgeous. The dark wood gleams, and the whole back wall of the A frame is windowed. The triangle at the top replaced with a leaded stained glass in a sunrise of orange and rose that reflects the undertones in the timber inside and the pines out the window, the mosaic just high enough to catch the last rays that will come in over the mountains at the end of the day and turn the whole place into a dream. The open floorplan has the kitchen near the door, but over by the windows….
Joel gives the tour. The hand-laid stones in the fireplace. The built-in shelves for your books. This is the corner where your favorite chair can go, nearest the fire and where there’s good light for spinning. This rug was here, still good. He points out to the little shed in the back–a place for wool dying, he can hang pegs in there however you need them.
If he weren’t so occupied in explaining the wood he chose to finish the countertop, the way he followed the original dovetailing in the doorframe, the pattern he made with the reclaimed wood in the floorboards, he may have seen you admiring the most important part of the house…or, rather, the most important person in it.
There’s more. Two bedrooms, one off each side of the main part of the house, each with its own bathroom, the larger one with its own porch overlooking a little creek.
“The basement’s not quite done, but I figure I’ll just use that for my own. Felt you might not like the…vibe…”
Ah yes. The former owners. He took care of that too.
He took care of everything.
“I love it, Joel.”
“Yeah?”
“If there was a stronger word, it would be yours, believe me.”
He only wraps his arms around you as you dive in to squeeze him.
“Good,” is all he says. Breathes in the scent of your hair. “That’s good.”
________
The ewes hate the leader ropes, but they follow, bleating now and then as you slowly guide them through the woods toward the Meadow’s north entrance. Joel’s got two behind his and Ellie’s horse, and you’ve got four behind yours, a small party, but the only ones that were ready to come on back out after the coldest weeks.
Goldie’s happy to lead them out to the rest of the flock while you and Joel go up and get situated, get warm, get ready for the week ahead. Ellie follows Goldie and Joel hangs his watch by the door. All’s quiet in the Roost.
Until Joel’s tongue clicks. “That beam is bowing,” he points up to one of the main rafter struts on the far side of the room. “Wood stove keeps this side warm and the snow melts off, but there’s no balcony on the other side. No way to rake the snow off the roof. Tommy should have known better.”
“Well it’s not like he’s had a lot of practice with big boy tree forts, I’m guessing,” you say, dumping a sack of potatoes near the cook pile and throwing the stack of fresh sheets onto the bed. “Does it need to come down?”
“Don’t think so. But come spring we’ll add on another balcony and do some reinforcement.”
As he runs his hand up the wall seam, you come up behind him, hugging him from the back with the sole purpose of distracting him, your way of letting him know he’s obsessing like an old man. It gives you the right angle to grab onto his open jacket and start pulling it off him. “Take this off and stay awhile.”
“Yes ma’am.”
Goldie takes her leave on your horse, guiding Joel and Ellie’s behind, glad to be going back to more warm water than she can heat on a stovetop, and Ellie helps to cart a few buckets of the colder variety up from the stream so you can all just stay in for the night.
Then it’s stew and cards, and Ellie kicking Joel’s ass at Scrabble, all of you bundled in wool sweaters and slippers handmade by you and Chickadee, the firelight glinting off the game tiles, highlighting the glee in the girl’s eyes, the resigned agony in Joel’s smile.
Almost a whole year now she’s been coming out here with you, and it’s wondrous how much she’s grown inside and out. You never felt lonely at the Roost, in fact, you had always very much enjoyed the solitude. Now you don’t think you could abide it. It’s only a home for a week at a time, but only when they come out here with you now.
It’s a nice night. Stars are out. Ellie’s still staring out at them as you and Joel fall asleep in the big bed.
_____
It’s the scent of woodsmoke that wakes you in the middle of the night, sitting you up straight in bed. Or so you think, except that the embers in the stove are low, so it can’t be that.
No. It’s a voice outside.
“Burn in hell, Joel Miller!”
Is that…Ellie? What’s she doing outside? No. Not Ellie. No it’s–
“Abby?” Ellie says blearily from the bunk above you.
There’s someone in the room moving swiftly toward you from the windows, hulking, with a rifle–
Joel.
“Get up. Both of you. Get out. The place is on fire.”
It doesn’t register.
“What? What fire? Joel? What’s happening–”
He shakes your shoulder, pulling you from the bed. “Get Ellie out. Now!”
There’s no other thought, just fumbling in the dark as Ellie jumps down beside you and dives for her jacket, shoving her feet into her boots without doing up the laces while you reach out one hand to catch hers for when it comes to you. The other gropes the near table for the walkie and thumbs the button.
“Meadowlark to patrol. Meadowlark to Goldfinch. We’re in trouble, there’s a fire and–”
The whole cabin sways. A gunshot from the balcony. Joel growling over his shoulder. “Get out! Now!”
“Joel–!”
“NOW!”
The ladder is still sliding down into place when you jump on it and ride it part of the way down, still waking up as Ellie’s boots come fast, almost kicking you in the face as she follows you down the rungs two at a time, moving through a plume of choking blackness only to come out below it to a roaring bonfire that’s eating through the Roost’s supports.
Oh god. The Roost…
is burning….
“JOELLLLLL!” you scream up as your stocking feet hit the ground hard, as you catch Ellie and pull her off the ladder and stumble backward, as something hits your head hard and causes you to let go, as separate sets of arms grab each of yours and drag you roughly backward, fast enough to keep your feet from catching up until you’re on your knees.
There’s a crackle in the air– “Patrol to Meadowlark. What’s the trouble?”
The walkie lies somewhere in the pine needles just out of reach and you’re screaming at it for help but all that comes out of your mouth is a string of names and no’s and helps. You’re able to yank your non-dominant arm free, pitching forward, clawing for the radio, until a flash of hard silver–a meteorite, exquisitely dense and smooth, malignant, swift, direct–cracks down on your forearm with a sickening thud, shattering the bone.
The world slides out of focus through a screen of sudden pain.
At first, you assume you’ve been shot in the arm. But then a figure steps around to your line of sight. Abby. With a golf club? What? Why? Where did she get that? The commissary? Why the fuck would they stock golf clubs? What the fuck is going on?
And you watch as Abby picks up the walkie. Tosses it into the fire.
The hands are back upon you now, forcing you back to your knees, and a third set joins them, wrapping around your forehead and chin, pulling you back against a belly and you struggle.
Where’s Ellie.
You’re able to twist your head to one side despite being held. She’s there on the ground, face down, groaning, with Owen’s knee in her back.
“Ellie? Honey?”
One pair of hands holding you twists you hard, meaning to pull you further away from her without compliance from the other hands or consent from your muscle structure and there’s a sickening pop as your shoulder leaves its socket and then your scream drowns out everything even the roar of the fire.
“She keeps it in her pocket,” Abby says. Rooting into Ellie’s pocket, Owen finds the knife and pulls it out–the one she cherishes, imbued with the legend of her mother, given to her on the same day as her name, her life, and her orphanhood.
The day Ellie told you the story, you’d taken steel wool to the knife and cleaned it. Oiled the hinge. Shined it up good and pretty.
It flips open easily in Owen’s paw. It twirls swiftly around, and points downward, his fingers closing over the hilt, thumb curling over the butt of the handle to give it more leverage when he’s ready to bring it down.
The night is horribly black and lit along the edges in orange fire.
There’s a loud crack. Owen’s thigh explodes in a splatter of blood and he falls backward off Ellie, screaming. The hands around your head let go and Mel runs to him.
Joel stalks out of the plume of black smoke, cocking the rifle, pointing only long enough at Owen to confirm he’s down and then swinging the barrel around to Abby.
A stand off. No sound or movement but the whoosh of flames and a few ground-muffled cries from Owen, a few sniffles and shushes from Mel.
“Who the fuck are you,” Joel growls out over the steel barrel, his cheek quivering in barely hinged anger.
Abby stands, solid, unyielding, straight as the blonde braid hanging down her back, club wound up tight, ready for the pitch, a face full of lines and soot and destruction.
“The last survivors of the Firefly massacre. You didn’t think to check the rest of the compound? Like the whole team was just one-offs? Like none of them had family, you sick fuck? You fucking orphaned us. Left us to fend for ourselves. Go ahead and shoot, old man. Marlene always said you weren’t so good at keeping kids alive, actually surprised you got as far as you did. So go ahead. Not like we’ve got nothing to lose. We just came to return some favors and finish the job.”
It’s only in the moments later, before the dawn, when you’re laying on your back looking up at the stars, one arm laying broken and useless in the snow beside you, the other cradling a weeping Ellie Williams as tight as you can, that you’ll be able to slow the film of your memory and play out the next thirty seconds frame by frame.
The series of snaps and cracks as the support under the Roost gave way and the whole structure tumbled out and away from the scene, pulling several pines down with it, the crashing and burning the only sound you remember now.
Ellie trying to shuffle along the ground toward you and away from the fire.
Owen pulling himself up enough to raise the knife and bring it down into the meat of Ellie’s calf.
Owen’s body flying backward as a bullet ripped through his skull.
A wrench of your neck and the warm splash of blood from above you as another shot rang out, one person holding you falling away and back, gone, but still pulling you down with their dead body.
The roar of an angry Abby and the clank of a club shaft on a rifle barrel.
Another gunshot.
The sound of metal hitting flesh.
Thirty seconds. And now you can see the stars. Orion. The Milky Way.
Somehow you’re lying yards from the little patch of burning trees with Ellie cradled in your good arm. Someone dragged you here.
There are voices and flashlights. The patrol. Bear and Tommy. Goldie and Willa and Chickadee.
And Maria. Laying on the ground beside you, exhausted from the effort of dragging two humans out of the burning thatch of trees.
“Joel. Where’s Joel.” It hurts to speak. Breath comes fast and shallow.
Then he’s there with the others, a bruise blooming purple beneath his eye, saying only what scant words he needs to move past them and get to you. To Ellie.
His hands are gentle, but his eyes are cold.
Two still, black pools reflecting fire.
_______
Perhaps unsurprisingly, you dream of Troy, his mangled face open and bleeding, laying in the hole next to Ash, mutilated, stopped at the moment of transformation into something more sinister, your ex-husband and his sister lost to you because they were headstrong, foolish, too devoted to each other….
Ash’s eyes open, what’s left of them anyway. “Abby’s afraid of heights. Didn’t even have time to tell her about the Roost being up on stilts. What’s a caboose?”
They didn’t know the Roost was elevated. They followed us out here and didn’t have a good plan. Is that it?
They don’t answer. They get up and climb out of the hole, turn their backs on your and walk into the forest. You call after them, desperate to have them back after all this time, begging them not to leave you.
But you’re calling after them wrong. You can’t seem to say Troy. You can’t say Ash.
You’re only calling out for Joel and Ellie.
_____
The next thing you know, you’re sitting up in the snow, leaning against Goldie, the girl patting at your cheek as you’re coming around. “Come on, come on back, baby.”
The sun’s up, but not high enough to breach the mountains circling the meadow. Everything’s still lit by the slowly dying flames.
The one two punch of Willa setting the bone and popping your shoulder back in must have sent you off. Looking down, you see you must have thrown up as well.
“Holy shit,” you groan, “I’m sorry. Oh my god, holy shit that hurts.”
“I know, I know,” says Goldie, smoothing your hair and kissing your forehead.
“Here,” says Willa, handing you some dark root. You forget what it’s called, you just know you gotta chew. “Don’t swallow,” she reminds you. “You ride with Goldie. She’ll keep you upright once that sets in.”
“I gotta get up,” you mumble, struggling to stand and inhaling sharply at the twinge of pain the movement brings to your bandaged and immobilized arm. Goldie’s able to help get you up, but seems hesitant to let you go. “Ain’t nothing wrong with my feet, lemme go. Where’s Ellie?”
But you don’t need to ask, she’s just behind you, laying on her back in the snow, one arm flung over her eyes, breathing heavy to manage the pain, leg bandaged and tourniqueted.
Good. Next priority. “Where’s Joel?”
Goldie points to the fire. It’s starting to die down, enough to make out the bodies of three teenagers consigned to the flames. Past them, the group of the regular patrol. Joel shaking his head at them, speaking. Jacket zipped up to the top, no scarf, no hat; probably got left behind in the Roost. Rifle over one shoulder. A backpack over the other.
But not his backpack. Why would he have someone else’s backpack? Why would he have one at all…
He’s…. No.
Pushing off Goldie, you immediately find out that walking is hard. Even if the pain’s just in one arm, everything’s connected, everything hurts; it’s disorienting. Your knees are bruised and even your soft sleep pants feel like sandpaper on them. Feet cold and wet, no boots…
Joel sees you struggling to get to him and walks away from the group and the fire, meeting you partway, catching your good arm as your fist falls hard on his shoulder and yanks, fingers digging in hard to his coat, doing your best to hold on tight, to keep him here, to convince him not to go.
“Don’t you dare, Joel Miller. What do you think you’re fucking doing???”
He says nothing, only lets you collapse onto his chest, to sob. There’s not even an arm to comfort you, he gives you nothing but the bare necessity, a wall to keep you standing, and you know nothing you say will make a difference. In essence, he’s already gone.
“Please. Joel. Don’t. Please don’t go.”
“Trail’s fresh. Best to get on before it snows and covers the tracks. One of them’s the pregnant girl. One of them’s bleedin’. They can’t get that far.”
“You don’t have to. Just come home.”
“They’ll just come back. Maybe not soon, but someday.”
He’s right. You know he’s right. Stepping back, it hurts to look at him. The Joel you love has been asked to step aside, the care and fondness he’s come to show you locked up somewhere secure, somewhere where it won’t get in the way.
I warned you, this Joel seems to say, void of emotion, jaw set, brow even and low, hand on the strap of his rifle. You took me in knowing exactly what I am.
He’s right.
“I need you here, Joel. Ellie needs you here. Don’t you dare go…unless you can come back.”
“I need you here too. ‘S why I’m going.”
Nothing. No kiss goodbye, no waiting for approval, he just turns and walks.
Maybe this is the last of it, just one last loose thread, then he can finally leave off wandering, finally shake off the killer and just come home, just be your Joel.
Convincing yourself of this is the only choice you’ve got.
________
You find yourself out on Maria’s back porch that night. Unable to sleep from the ache of the mending bone and the swell of your assaulted shoulder, it seemed like the best remedy was to find the toughest jerky in the kitchen, to sit on the porch in the cold and chew through the pain, and to lean back in one of the porch chairs with a soothing snowpack between it and your back.
The moonlight plays illusions like the canteen filmstrips–a summer image of Tommy and Joel teaching Ellie the mechanics of tackle football. The twinkle of the fireflies lending veritas to the picture…which in reality is only the twinkle of a dusting of new snow.
Not enough snow to make tracking impossible, but enough to make it difficult.
The back door opens and a blanket lands over your lap.
“Was gonna ask you if you wanted company, but then I decided, it’s my house and you don’t get a choice.”
Maria plops her own blanket in a nearby chair before disappearing and returning with two steaming mugs of tea as offering for the table between you. She takes her time covering you just so before wrapping herself up and joining you on the porch. “Suppose I should have asked if you want that cold pack changed before I get too comfortable,” she says, not really offering, but leaving the suggestion there between you if you need it.
It’s not necessary to talk for a while. She knows exactly what you’re thinking. Sees what you see.
“Did I wake you?”
“No. Riley did,” she lies. You’d heard her shift when you got up from the bed–her bed, well, hers and Tommy’s. But hers and yours for now.
“Thanks for taking care of us.”
“You say that like you’re not my family.”
“Well then, thanks for staying behind as if you are.”
It’s hard to see her out of the corner of your eye, backed by dark shadows. But the moon plays little crescents on her face, the curve of her nose, her cheek, her chin. Her voice comes out velvet from the dark.
“I know you’re pissed at Joel for going, but he’s doing the right thing.”
Now you make the effort to turn, rotating more from the waist than the neck to save the injury from twinging, but it does anyway, mirroring your spike in irritation. “Really? You think so? Is that why you sent Tommy with him? After all that time you spent bemoaning the things Joel made Tommy do all those years ago–”
“This is different. This is about the greater good.”
“You know that’s what the villain always says, right?”
She presses her lips together, hating that you’re right. “Okay, so maybe not the greatest good for the morality of the remainder of the human race, but. For the good of Jackson.”
“Two grown men hunting down two teenage girls is the greater good.”
“They won’t be teens forever. They’ve both got reasons to come back for their revenge. And now they know where Jackson is. They get taken in by the wrong people, and then the wrong people will know where Jackson is too and when they come back they won’t be alone. They’ll know exactly how many and what kind of folk to bring.” She holds your gaze for a few seconds, steady and wise but also warning, her warmth only thinly veiling the matronly protectress behind it, like a Durga on her throne. “You know why we have patrols. You know what happens to people that get too close. Two more drops in the bucket is all.”
“Three. One of those little girls is pregnant.”
She has no answer to this. Rather, your dig brings no new argument to the table. It’s just words, just a fact on the wind. It doesn’t sway the needle one way or the other.
It’s exactly what you’d been thinking about, staring up at her bedroom ceiling. Then out here on the porch. It’s like she knew you needed to hear the justification out loud.
“They would have killed him, lady. And Ellie. And you. I’m surprised you don’t want them hunted down like dogs.”
You turn your attention to the back yard, the smallest hump of leaves under the big tree there not quite scattered to the wind, sparkling with snow cover. You can almost still hear Ellie’s high laughter as it sounded the day she experienced her first leaf pile.
“Oh, I want them run down,” you say. “I’m all for that, let ‘em eat lead. I just didn’t want…” It’s not really necessary to continue. Maria knows exactly what you want. She always does. That’s why she sent Tommy with him. To keep him tethered to humanity.
To the way Joel watched Ellie jump and disappear into a poof of leaves. The sun in his smile. At peace. At home. Free from the old violence. Reborn.
I just didn’t want Joel to be the one to do it.
______
Maria’s dinner table feels empty. Funny, you think, it was always the two of you. For a while there was four, what with Troy and Ash, but most of the time just the two. Then Tommy. Then Joel and Ellie. Now Riley…well, that is, if he’s still up during family dinner.
You’ve slept through most of the light of day and was hoping to talk to Ellie at dinner, but Maria’s been taking all her meals to the guest room for her. Mostly so she doesn’t have to walk down the stairs on her healing leg, but also because Ellie’s not been talking since that night.
And you can guess why. It has less to do with the injury and assault or the fire, and more about the truths she learned during them.
Not much to do. The arm has to stay stable, strapped to your body. At least they fucked up the non-dominant one so you can still hold a fork, still brush your teeth. But knitting? Spinning? Helping Maria clear the dishes? Fat chance.
Not much to do but chew root, smoke wild weed, and sleep it off.
Maria reappears with a plate needs washing. “There’s a break in the clouds. I got three whole words out of her. This might be your chance.”
“Oh. Joy.” It’s getting to be less of an effort to stand now that you’ve got rest and food in you. The stairs are daunting only because of the conversation that waits at the top.
A knock on her door only grants you silence.
“I’m coming in, Starling girl. Best not be naked.”
No answer. You take that as the opposite of opposition. Tolerance.
She’s sitting on the bed, propped up by pillows behind her back and under her knee, her bandages freshly changed, no more blood pooling or free bleeding. She plays with the cuffs of her sweater, tugging at a loop in the knit, a book abandoned by her side as if she’d put it down when you knocked. A good sign. She doesn’t want to hide.
You crawl in beside her, awkwardly, one-handedly, a big showy sigh of relief when you finally land. “You know, if I was your mom, I’d probably start off with ‘what’cha reading there, kiddo?�� just to get you to say something, but I’m not your mom and I’m not here to make you talk if you don’t wanna–”
“Well I don’t.”
“Good. I didn’t come up here to hear you yap anyway.” You detect the tiniest twitch of her cheek, not quite a smile, perhaps a sneer…to scare away a smile. “Don’t talk, just listen.”
“I don’t wanna do that either.”
“Tough titties. I’m cashing in exchange for all the time I had to listen to you go on about Sally Fucking Ride.”
Now she does smile. Barely. Gives you the teenager face you wanna slap sometimes. “Tough titties? Really?”
“They didn’t have tough titties in the orphanage? Seems off-brand.” The smile fades. “Tell me how you’re healing. I’m not asking, I’m demanding.”
A big breath in. But the air doesn’t come rushing back with a dramatic sigh, just melts out of her with a single tear she doesn’t move to brush away.
So you do. “That bad, huh.”
“It fucking sucks. It fucking sucks so bad.”
“Heh, tell me about it. I miss the good old days of ibuprofen. Shit. I miss morphine. You’re young though, you’ll be up and running in a week or two. Me? I’m gonna be aching for–”
“He fucking lied through his teeth.”
Ah. There it is.
Now the colony of tears follows the first scout, pouring out over the plains of her cheeks until she covers her face with those cuffs she’s been picking at, relieved at being able to let it all out in front of someone who might understand, but probably scared as hell to let herself be this messed up in front of someone who might not. A gamble.
And a win. You’ve still got one good arm and you put it to good use, pulling her into your side. “Yeah, you’re right. He totally did. He’s a fucking asshole. Why the hell would he do that.”
“It wasn't time that did it,” she hiccups from under her woolen cuffs.
“I don’t know what that means, Starling” you say, unable to stop yourself from kissing the crown of her head.
She wipes her nose and comes up for air. “I mean I know why. But he fucking lied about everything. Straight to my face.”
“Well, you’ve got every right to demand an explanation and an apology when he comes back. Straight to his face.”
“If he comes back.”
You let that sit a moment between you. It’s her way of saying that she knows you’re mad at him too, that she heard the conversation you had with him when he left. It’s her way of poking at your own fears and getting you on her side.
“Those girls aren’t armed and the Miller boys have a lot more experience with being hunters than those kids do being prey. He’ll be back.”
“I hate him.”
“I know. But also. You don’t.”
“I had a… a purpose. A fucking purpose.”
“Well….I know you did, but…probably not so much as you think.” She looks up at you but you can’t meet her eye, she’s right to mourn, and you can’t deny her that. “Remember what I told you about my sister and her treatments?”
“The research hospital.”
“Yeah. Cancer’s been killing people on this earth far longer than cordyceps and they’d had millions of patients to test on. Still couldn’t crack it. How many people are immune like you? Because if it ain’t millions, you just become one part sample in a petri dish and another part dead body that maybe give some vague clues and then you’re all parts in the bin, end of story. I mean, I’ll be honest. I don’t blame him. You’re quite a keeper.”
Now her sigh is dramatic. “And then he fucking lied about it.”
“So you would feel good about it. Accomplished in your goal. Also so you wouldn’t hate him for caring about you more than you do.”
“Why didn’t he just say–?”
“Do you know that man to be good with words?”
This quiets her. Both of you. For a few minutes. She goes back to picking at her sleeves.
The sun’s set completely now and her little bedside lamp can’t even drown out the stars so bright on the other side of the window. Clear night. Cold out there.
After a moment you take your arm back, jostle her with your shoulder. “Hey. I’m going out to the Meadow tomorrow, check in with Willa, look over the damage. If I bring you back a piece of the Roost, you wanna do some carving or whittling or something? We’ll build a platform like the old one and it’s probably just gonna be a tent up there for a while like it used to be, but hopefully this spring or summer we’ll get a structure up there and we’ll need a cornerstone or a plaque or something signifying its importance. Since you’re on your ass all day with nothing better to do, and you’re the star recruit, I’d love for you to do it.”
Her lips twist, half smiling at the request, but then in regret. “I lost my knife.”
“The one from your mom?” She nods. “Well if you’ll do some carding for me while I’m out there, I promise to look for it, ask around, maybe one of the patrol picked it up, okay?”
“Okay. Oh. By the way…How are you healing?”
“I’ve been worse. But mostly I’ve been better. Thanks for asking. ‘S kind of you. But don’t you worry about me.”
“Okay. Um…I’m…sorry about telling them about the meadow and all.”
“Why? You’re a Roostling. It’s your story to tell.” Sliding off the bed you head for the door. “Oh hey. I meant to ask–” you nod at the book by her side. “What’cha reading?”
She doesn’t miss a beat. “Oh…just porn.”
“Cool. G’night.”
“‘Night. Hey Meadowlark?”
You poke your head back in before the door closes completely. “Hm?”
“Thanks. For all that. But mostly for not calling me kiddo.”
You smile. Nod. Give her a warm wink. “Sure. I gotchu, kiddo.”
It’s worth the eyeroll you catch as you close the door.
________
The most sickening part of coming in through the north passage isn’t seeing the burn scar on the pine grove in the middle of the Meadow, isn’t missing the outline of the Roost through the trees, but rather the feeling that your home has been breached, that for a moment it wasn’t safe and now you’ll always wonder if it will be.
Riding across the north plain, you close your eyes and breathe, let the horse plod on without your guidance, he knows the way. Once spring comes and the valley fills with flowers and the music of the lambs calling for their ewes takes over from this cold silence that comfort will be renewed.
But for now, there is no comfort on the Meadow in winter, not without a pretty little fireplace and a warm spot to watch the snow build up on the mountains.
You know what’s coming, but it turns your heart inside out all the same when you open your eyes.
Where once there was a cabin in the treetops is now a void leading downward to a pile of blackened rubble and debris. Off to the side under some lower trees is the old canvas tent with the vent hole and a friendly little trail of smoke rising from it. Willa always knew her way around a fire and didn’t mind keeping a low one going on the inside. You never were that confident, even with a fire-treated tarp.
She’s been at work out here, pulling useful things out of the rubble. The woodstove. The pulley jacks. A few timbers that are mostly unburned.
But there’s a pile of other things too, useless items that shouldn’t be mixed back in with the earth: a burned walkie. Twisted silverware and blackened plates. The iron tools from the rafters. Shattered tile. Your charred and mangled boots.
All that’s left in the major wreckage is wood. And glass. And bones.
Three blackened skulls, three sets of eye sockets and three jaws gaping up at the sky as if they were caught in the moment of realizing their plans were going terribly awry.
Stupid fucking kids. ….Just kids.
If someone asked you how you knew which one was Owen’s, you wouldn’t be able to say. You just know. The memory of him sinking that knife into Ellie’s leg…of hurting her…intent to kill… His skull breaks like a cracker when you put your weight on it.
Willa doesn’t say anything when she comes up along side to stare down at the bones with you. It's not the first time you've stood with her at the edge of a burned down home.
"I hate that it’s gonna take me a while to sift though all this,” you say.
“We’ve decided to skip your turn for a while. At least until there’s a new platform.”
You nod, resigned. You don’t love it, but it’s best. Trauma lingers longest of all hurt.
“How’s the flock?”
“They’re over it.”
“Figures. Fluffy shits. Any chance you found a pocket knife out here?” You ask her.
She nods, reaches into a jacket pocket and there it is, like it’s been waiting to come back to its keeper, made itself shiny and easily found. It’s passed between you like a sacred object, holy, a relic saved and cared for, a thing infused with deep love and meaning. There’s an instant relief as your fingers curl around it, your shoulders relaxing and releasing a little of the pain.
“Thank you.”
“There was this too.” From the same pocket Willa pulls a disk of silver and glass, turning it over and placing it in your hand with the knife.
The watchband is burned away. But it’s otherwise unharmed.
Willa may be a stoic, but she knows enough to recognize a release through tears and to hold you while you cry.
Later that afternoon when you knock on Ellie’s door, you’ll hand her the knife and a piece of the old Roost to carve to consecrate the new one. And then you’ll give her the watch and ask her to be your hands, to help you with one more thing.
________
Two days later, you’re standing in Joel’s living room, never having been here when it’s so quiet, dark, and cold. With you and Ellie staying with Maria, there’s been nobody here to light a fire, to make the place live. You wouldn’t be here if Maria hadn’t made a side comment about maybe you and Ellie’d been in the same clothes for a day too many. Not that you thought you’d be with her that long.
She was right. It was nice to change into something clean–a soft fleece and some sleep pants. While the sword of Damocles kept things in check at Maria’s house, it did feel just this side of an extended girl’s night sleepover, might as well dress for it. Ellie had asked for something soft and comfy so you decided to go for it, an assortment of sweats and sweaters in the duffel at your feet.
What you’re eyeing at the moment is an empty hook on the wall by the fireplace.
You put your hand in your jacket pocket and pull out the watch.
Ellie did a beautiful job with it, took directions like a champ. Sitting together on her bed, listening to Joan Jett and Pat Benetar, you’d instructed her how to design the plaid stripes into the strap, how to knot and plait in patterns.
“Macrame. MACrame. Mac. Ra. Mayyyyyy,” Ellie’d chanted. “It’s a fun word to say. What’s it mean?”
“Fringe. Knotting. It’s just the name of the technique. I dunno. Probably something prettier in French.”
The strap clasps had been lost in the fire, so you’d had Ellie work him a new strap out of dyed and tightly-spun wool, something a little longer so he could tie it on. Most likely he’d come back here first, so you want to put it somewhere he’d see it, that way he could have it again without a lot of fuss but knowing at the same time you were thinking of him. So you slip the end loop over the hook, gently let it slip through your fingers and rest against the wall.
If he comes back…
The front door opens. Boots on the wood. The thump of a backpack.
By the time you’ve turned, he’s coming in through the front hall.
When he sees you standing here, he stops.
You never imagined this moment. You should have. It might have prepared you for the yellowing bruise on his face, the majority of his left pant leg browned with dried blood, his knuckles raw and just beginning to heal over.
You struggle with finding the right question. Find ‘em? They dead? Finish the job? No survivors?
I’d ask you what the hell you did, but I know and I don’t wanna hear you say it.
Instead all you can muster is a nod at the blood on his jeans.
His eyes slide to the staircase, already looking to move on, and he only answers with a short and shallow nod of his own before doing just that.
You find yourself sitting on the couch, staring at your hands, the duffel, the watch, back at your hands. Listening as he moves around upstairs, dropping boots, his belt buckle clapping to the floor. The shower running for a long, long time.
Sun’s going down. Getting colder.
The squeaks from the staircase are slow, softer than usual. He’s taking his time coming down. Doesn’t want to force himself back into a space so safe and quiet after pushing through one so big and mean.
He barely shifts the couch as he sits on the far side. Clean shirt. Clean jeans. A pair of socks you knit him.
“Where’s Ellie?” He sounds like he hasn’t spoken to anyone in days. You’d wager he hasn’t.
“With Maria. We’ve been staying there. I was just getting us some clothes. Didn’t think you’d be gone this long.”
“Neither did I. They had a head start. Younger. Faster. But you’re safe now. You’re both safe now.” He’s quiet long enough for the house to give a settling creak as the wind picks up outside. “How’s that arm?”
“Joel, you can’t keep us safe from the world. The world is what it is.”
“The fuck I can’t,” he whispers back, defiant, stubborn, with enough venom that he seems to scare himself and he breathes in deep, keeps it, holding back.
All you want is your Joel back. Even in all this mess. All you want is for him to lay down his fear and love you the right way.
So instead of arguing, you get up and stand before him, give him the time it takes to understand you’re going to straddle his lap whether he helps you or not. He reaches for you on your way down, guides and supports you, allows you to rake through his wet curls before leaning in to take possession of his lips, to will him–by kissing through to his very soul–to come back to you.
He can’t help but respond, his whole body coming to life, and in the cold, twilit living room, you become a tangle of silhouettes as his hand pushes up under your sweater–somehow still keeping an aura of care around your ruined and wrapped arm–to squeeze almost painfully at your curves, rough and wanting, panting between devouring kisses as he paws beyond the waistband of your sleep pants, sucking at your neck when you throw your head back as he reaches what he was searching for….what you hoped he’d find…
There’s a tousle of repositioning and a clatter of belt and zipper. You’re both raw and rough and needy, and you both take advantage of the emptiness of the house to fill it with the sounds of desperation, of effort, the song of casting off of all inhibition, a duet of total and grateful release.
But through it all, it’s the way he holds onto you that tells you how much he wanted to get back to you, how close he intends to hold you and never let you go, a desperation that tells you exactly where his faults lay…
…that it was necessary–and always will be–to eliminate any chance of someone taking you from his world by force.
It’s not so much possession as a fierce and burning need to be possessed. A need to belong, concentrated down to its basest form.
“I’m sorry,” he says as he softly kisses your temple, spooning you in the afterglow that burns bright in the darkening room.
“For what? You didn’t hurt me.”
“Rushed it a little. Tend to act before thinkin’ sometimes.”
You’re not completely sure what he means by that. At first you think he’s talking about the rough sex, but you get his meaning. Stalking off after Abby and Mel so impulsively. For being impulsive in general.
For acting out of trauma.
Or love.
“I’m not the one you need to apologize to for that, Joel.”
You can tell the moment he understands when his forehead gently meets your shoulder. “Shit.”
It’s probably the best time to break it to him, while he’s still a little softheaded and euphoric. “She’s ready to listen. But I won’t promise it’ll be easy. It might just be you and me here for a while.”
Once his breathing evens out, he shifts, still holding onto you, but just coming back down, settling back in.
“What’s that?” He mutters, just on this side of falling asleep, lazily pointing at the watch on the hook by the fireplace.
“Your Valentine’s Day present. From both of us. Sorry it’s late.”
________
Taking some shifts off from the Meadow rotation affords you time to start slowly moving things over to the new A-frame, Maria helping you to load up a skid now and then and unload it, walking beside you as you lead the horse that tows it.
After a week or two, Ellie’s up and walking–well, limping, but healing–and starting to talk to Joel at dinner again. She’s on the verge of actually gracing his bad jokes with a smile or even a laugh, but she’s making him work hard for it. Good for her.
You haven’t asked either of them how the talk went. Don’t know if you ever will. That’s between them, the less you interfere, the better.
But you know that things are on the mend when you find Ellie playing Joel’s guitar–learning some Johnny Cash song you know he loves.
And you have a feeling that spring is on the way when you drop off another load at the new house and find a new frame on the wall–a handmade, custom carpentry display shadowbox.
With a watch hanging inside.
_______
PREVIOUS: AUTUMN
NEXT: SPRING AGAIN (coming soon)
MASTERLIST
SERIES MASTERLIST
#leave off your wandering#tlou fanfiction#joel miller#joel miller x reader#joel miller x f!reader#joel miller x meadowlark#joel miller x mature reader
57 notes
·
View notes
Last Seen Blogs
dungeonmeshititlepages
Title Pages
ask-lawlight
L and Light answer the fangirl's questions...
keiamadeleineem
✨Your chaotic Neighbor✨
thekidhasarrived
Casa de Chaos
arlertt