hi hello i feel like i was hit by a truck

→ ENHYPEN’S RED FLAGS !! ⚠︎

PAIRING | ot7 x fem!reader

GENRE | crack

WORD COUNT | 1.3k

WARNINGS | mentions of food; reader is referred to as “girl”; i’m pretty sure it’s fine but it is possible i made mistakes w the tenses (i’m still tryna get used to writing more in present tense T-T)

DISCLAIMER | THIS IS NOT IN ANY WAY A FORM OF HATE TOWARDS ENHYPEN (pls i love these boys w my entire being how could i) this is a joke so don’t take this too seriously lol

A/N | had the time of my life choosing pics for the moodboard btw they had me out here cackling at 3 am (first red flag: i’m out here losing sleep bc of them !! smh)

이희승 ! HEESEUNG

too handsome… how can you stand to look at that devilishly handsome face without ever passing out due to lack of oxygen in your lungs when he’s always taking your breath away?! also y’all become way too popular; people are always staring at you two (not only heeseung but you too obviously 😏), it’s tiring being so famous yk 🙄

good at everything… it’s lowk invigorating sometimes bc he’s always outdoing you in everything. when you play games, he’s beating you; when you’re having fun at karaoke, he’s always out-singing you or showing off with his fancy riffs and harmonies; when you’re playing sports together, he always has a way of beating you, no matter what the sport. he even manages to do better at the simple task of making ramyeon. and we all know that’s only to list a few. it’s just so tiring having such a perfect bf 😔

박종성 ! JAY

jawline is too sharp… you cup his jaw as you kiss him then suddenly you hurt your hand on his sharp jawline !! it’s not fair that you have to sacrifice your hands every day just because he looks so good.

cooks for everyone… because he cooks so much, you can’t just be hanging out watching him be all hot and sexy as he cooks for everyone all the time !! you’ve had enough of back hugging him, cheek pressed against his firm back muscles (they’re so strong, it hurts your face !!), or smelling and eating all the delicious food,,, you just wanna spend alone time with your man, without the kitchen as the third wheel :’D your bf is just so husband material, and being able to provide for everyone aside from just you and him is just so, totally, very much, rlly unattractive (that’s sarcastic btw i actually couldn’t come up w any negative points to this why would anyone hate that about him-)

심재윤 ! JAKE

always has his tongue hanging outside of his mouth or his teeth sunk into his bottom lip with a smirk… no wonder my man always has ulcers lol jk i have no idea how that actually works,, but you can never kiss him cuz his mouth hurts !! but he’s too hot for you to handle anyways so- sometimes he’ll be all seductive with that smirk after swiftly swiping his tongue over his lips and you have to literally take a moment to compose yourself before he wraps his hands around your waist, biting his bottom lip before leaning in to kiss you,, oh my heart :’>

loves his dog too much… sure, loving layla taught him ways on how to love on his own future girl, but you didn’t realize how long it would take him to transfer the title of his most favourite girl from layla to you. you were always competing with a dog and yes, she’s cute but how was this fair?! so let’s just say it took many years of hard work and determination until you finally stole that hard earned title.

박성훈 ! SUNGHOON

doesn’t hang out with enough girls… so he has no experience when it comes to dating you. even before dating you, he was basically a total clutz. not being around girls enough made him feel nervous whenever he was around them due to lack of experience. and so whenever it came to you at first, he was always a nervous wreck and super awkward. and even after dating you, though he is so much better and confident, he still has his slip ups and tends to get super shy whenever you make him flustered (which occurs a lot more often than you’d imagine)! alexa play ‘super shy’ by newjeans 👖

too funny… he randomly comes out with these stupidly funny jokes or comments that make you laugh so hard, it makes your tummy, cheeks and lungs hurt. whenever you tell him you’re gonna die of laughter, you’re not joking.

김선우 ! SUNOO

too sassy… like why does he always have to react with his eye rolls or side eyes whenever you tease him, with that snarky scoff. and then when he’d tease you back, he’d just take the remarks to a whole other level. but occasionally this sass would be used in your favour; whenever a friend would tease you, he’d always get very defensive and have the best comebacks. actually depending on how close you two are with the friend, he once in a while would take the side of your friend and just tease you harder.

perfect figure… he outdoes you all the time. like sunoo give us ladies a chance to shine?? he’s always stealing the spotlight, it’s annoying sometimes !! 🙄 like yes, you (y/n) are always hot and super attractive (self confidence!!! you deserve to love yourself 😌) but for some reason people are always complimenting sunoo’s body instead of yours. but let me let you in on a little secret… it’s only because it’s obvious you’re the one who’s clearly more physically attractive. and who states the obvious these days anyway? hmph 😌

양정원 ! JUNGWON

too loveable… in other words,, there’s nothing to ever (playfully) hate on him with or tease him about !! so boring 👎👎👎 like you just constantly wanna love on him. he can be teasing you about an embarrassing moment of yours that happened just a couple minutes ago, and then you try to think of a comeback but then you take one glimpse into his eyes and suddenly you’re melting on the spot as your mind is wiped of everything you could’ve ever thought up in one quick moment. and suddenly you can only think about the things about him that give you warm, fluffy feelings. HE COULD BE DOING THE BARE MINIMUM AND YOURE FULL HEART EYES FOR HIM he’s just perfect. so unfair and so not fun 👎👎

duality… DOES HE EVEN UNDERSTAND THAT HE SHOULD HAVE YOUR HEART TO LOOK AFTER ???? like what about your well being ??? how about YOUR FEELINGS ???? like you’re constantly being emotionally pulled this way and that cuz one second he’ll be the cutest bf ever with his bread cheeks and fluffy smile when all of a sudden he has a dance to practice and all of a sudden he’s in performance mode, and his duality is just insane !!! is that even the same jungwonie that was with you just a second ago ???? i think not !!! smh

西村 力 ! NI-KI

too tall; doesn’t stop growing… (if he’s a lot taller than you) how are you gonna kiss him?? how is he gonna kiss you?? no but even if he isn’t a lot taller than you now, this boy doesn’t stop growing. you won’t admit it but it’s actually really romantic and hot the way he’d do things to match your heights, such as the other day when he carried you onto the counter, stood between your legs, and pressed his lips against yours in the hottest kiss you’ve ever shared. it’s simply not okay ???

too good of a dancer… outdoes you in every dance game. like riki at least give us a chance??? i mean sometimes he does, but the competitive side of him always wins and he just ends up beating you anyways like always 🙄 also getting to watch him on stage is like seeing a whole other riki. you mostly know him for his goofy personality, but whenever you get to see him perform, he switches that off and enters his alter ego and it has to be the hottest thing you’ve ever seen. so you get the best of both worlds… which obviously isn’t healthy for your heart ???

A/N | it takes only two seconds and a click to make your favourite writers’ day with a reblog. and if you want to take 30 extra seconds of your day to add even just the smallest comment, even just a few nice words of encouragement in your reblog or in the comments, those put the biggest smiles on our faces. let us know how you liked what you just read by telling us and showing us so we can continue putting out content that you can enjoy! thank you! <3

M.LIST | TAGLIST FORM

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they are so handsome 😔 smh

Another appreciation rant :)))

I've done Smiley and Waka, it's Kazutora's turn.

Kazutora is the loml. I feel like I might've said that about the other two but jdurjdhfhejr.

"Cute petshop guy" YES HE IS (chifuyu too, but this isn't about him)

He's so cute, pretty, fine, adorable, pretty, handsome, pretty (he's very pretty)

I've always hated black and yellow together, till I saw him. He's literally perfect in every way like 😔😔

Makes it even more depressing he's just a drawing smh

Pretty, pretty, pretty.

His hair is pretty, his eyes are pretty, he's tiny, he likes cats, he sort of resembles one-

💍🧎‍♂️

I love himmmmm and kind of wanna throw his dad off a clifffff

Kid Kazutora is one of my favorite things ever. He's so small, innocent-lookin, small, adorable-

I don't have enough words stacked up in my head to describe him, he's too good for any words in the English vocabulary.

He's one of the best characters ever and I love him.

Thanks for listening to (reading???) my rant lol.

He's beauty

He's grace

He'll punch Takemichi in the face

thousand autumns donghua, episode 6~

shen qiao: bro why did u poison me? :) yu ai: lol what?? POISON?? whaaaat??? no waaayyy, i would NEVER!!! here drink something i prepared with my poisoner hands pls shen qiao: 🎶MAYBE I SHOULDN'T SAYS CÚNLA!🎶 past!yu ai: yes…..YES! DRINK IT!! DRINK THE POISON BOOZE!! BAHAHAHAHAAHAAAA >:D past!shen qiao: bby bro ilu, actually ur just as good as i am, so u look after everything for me, ok?? if i die u take over my position and everything will be great, i trust u with my whole heart :) :) :) past!yu ai: ….....uh-oh ngl yu ai has a really cute face??? actually i might…..i might think he's a teeny tiny bit cuter than shen qiao?? I DON'T LIKE HIM MORE!! but idk i feel like….maybe they fussed with shen qiao's face a bit TOO much and got a weird effect? (i say this as someone who often fusses too much over my drawings' faces and ends up with a weird effect ;A; it's a curse 😔) NOOO SHEN QIAO DON'T GET SICKER!! poor bby sorry i criticised ur appearance so much ;A; awww he doesn't want to be bros anymore ;A; i find it interesting how he's willing to be forgiving of strangers, but not his former bro. not that the former bro really deserves it, bc he's being awful ;A; but its interesting to me, how different ppl approach betrayal!! I WOULD LIKE TO KNOW MORE ABOUT U SHEN QIAO. TELL ME UR SECRETS PLS. yan wushi is so relatable lol. he watches all this and goes 'what an idiot!' and it doesn't even matter who he's referring to, bc he's right lmao shen qiao poor bby ;A; he cough so much ;A; someone get my mans a glass of water ;A; HOLY SHIT YU AI JUST ATTACKED HIM WTF???!!!!! DID DID HE CALL HIM A-QIAO AS WELL?? WHAT A RUDE JERK!! THAT IS UR SHIXIONG, U BRAT!! >:V yu ai: 'i don't want u to leave!' *makes shen qiao spit blood* 'i don't want to hurt u!! come on bro, just stay here with meeeee uwu' ITS THE OLD MAN! HE'S HERE!! aww he help shen qiao up ;A; so cute ;A; uh sir u need to learn to take 'no' for an answe--OK NVM HE'S JUST WHISKING SHEN QIAO AWAY BY THE WAIST ONCE MORE THAT'S FINE. I GUESS yan wushi, king of evils??? LMAO more like king of dramatic hoes 'the evil gang' ….idk what i expected it to be called really DID HE JUST DID HE SLAP YU AI FOR CALLING SHEN QIAO 'A-QIAO'????? THATS AMAZING a bit hypocritical BUT STILL AMAZING AND HILARIOUS DO IT AGAIN!! DO IT AGAIN!! he's such a badass omg ;A; also he has such great accessories!! such good taste in fashion rly!! lol now it's yu ai's turn to spit blood!! serves u right for being a jerk smh lol i LOVE these random side characters who just look like normal ppl in comparison to these bishounen pretty boys. 10/10 artistic choice oh we've met a new friend! yuanchun! hello sir!! he's quite handsome, even if his spine is made of jam SHEN QIAO WILL U WHIST I CAN'T HEAR THEM OVER UR INNER MONOLOGUE yws: i'm gonna help u, then hurt u, then help u again, then ruin ur day and make u cry >:) shen qiao: …….. :( get me out of here pls :( yws: *evil laughs triumphantly* i just want everyone to know that every time yan wushi evil laughs, i laugh too🤣 'YOU SHAMELESS GUUUUYYYYY!!!!!!' amazing oh ok we're we're just gonna fight now. ok cool fellas, is it gay to touch fingertips with ur bro while wreathed in spiritual energy?? GHOST SWORDS!! i do love these pretty sequences with all the martial arts…..stuff lol. i wish i were clever enough to describe it but. just know that it's all very spiritual and neat ;A; aww shen qiao is so cool ;A; ilu my lad! ur a good boi!! WH SSIR SIR WHY ARE U GRABBING HIS FACE LIKE THAT WHOOOAAA UR GETTING REAL CLOSE TO HIM THERE SIR oh i see, the devil whispering in ur ear is actually yan wushi trying to make u be his wife, it all makes sense now!! yws: A-QIAO COME BE EVIL WITH ME. IT'LL BE FUN A-QIAO I PROMISE. WE CAN BE EVIL TOGETHER A-QIAO. I WILL BE THE EVIL HUSBAND AND U CAN BE MY EVIL WIFE A-QIAO. ARE U THE ONE FOR ME A-QIAO??? I THINK U ARE THE ONE A-QIAO. A-QIAO the old man moves fast, not like he's got unlimited time left i guess OH MY GOD HE'S LITERALLY CARRYING HIM AWAY LIKE A BRIDE in summation:

✨THESE BITCHES GAY✨

Gender/sexuality struggles below I’m pondering the Frivolities again and it’s not going well I’m inscrutable even to myself

it’s long be warned

What is gender. What does it feel like to yall

same goes with attraction

Cause like. I’m not sure if I’m feeling it

I know that I like women more than men but like. It’s in a way that I’ll see a guy everyone is calling hot or attractive or handsome and it’s like. Wow that sure is a guy. He looks. Neat. I guess? Idk and then I’ll see a woman who everyone is calling beautiful or hot or attractive and I’ll say something like wow she looks very pretty :) and I’ll see someone androgynous or something and I’ll be like wow they look so cool and. Idon’t know what I am anymore? And also I’ve never had a crush??? So no help from myself there and with gender it’s. ????? Not there????? i want to look androgynous or slightly more masculine and fuck up what people think of me as, but yet I try to ask myself what gender I am I come up with nothing. I’m used to being female, but it feels flimsy or nonexistent. and so does being male. And yet I feel too gender to be non binary and yet I also am not gendering???? And yet I still typically go by she/her??? But also not????? Smh my head I’m getting confused over the trivial again 😔

in conclusion I think I’ve just written a better paragraph than what I’ve ever written in English class with the whole 2 points of evidence and stuff and yet it’s still disappointingly mid smh my head😔 anyways this has been my tri-yearly identity crisis- gender edition! Am I aroace? Am I gay? Am I agender? Am I cis? Who the fuck knows! Certainly not me!

There's no message in this drawing, my sole purpose to draw this is just so I could draw him without his coat on 🥺👉👈 (and also I want them to be together again yes 😭😭😭)

them...

God i remember one time i had a Moment™ in the middle of the night and for a second i nearly develop a crush over vinesauce Joel

♡. THINGS THEY DO MAKE YOU FLUSTER

𝐅𝐓. OT7 . . . 𝐖𝐀𝐑𝐍𝐈𝐍𝐆 : none , not proof read , rest undercut

𝐖𝐂. 0.6k . . . 𝐆. FLUFF

𝐀𝐍. school has rlly taken me for granted, also to ppl who understand arabic I hope you see the lil arabic i used 😔( not me being excited over my broken arabic🧍🏻‍♂️), anyways enjoy. would be rlly appreciated if you can reblog with some feedback and like

i. . .𝐇𝐄𝐄𝐒𝐄𝐔𝐍𝐆 : brushes your stray hair behind your ears while you talk to him, hee is a gentleman but don’t let that confuse you, he would do anything to see you all red, a sense of pride? yes most certainly. he noticed that doing so just leaves starstruck and in awe so he does that, honestly to you he seems like a prince doing that even though his motives are not necessarily princely “you look beautiful” also throws his signature smile for extra effect. 

ii. . .𝐉𝐀𝐘 : wears your initial around his neck so whenever it flashes it leaves you giddy, I mean who wouldn’t be giddy when you have THE jay park wearing your initial and calling himself as your property, he knows what effect it has on you he purposely plays with it when he is around you “how is it?” “it's pretty jay” makes you compliment the necklace at least 100 times a day.

iii. . .𝐉𝐀𝐊𝐄 : cooks. that's it, a man who can cook for you is the biggest green flag, husband him up in a heartbeat, his main agenda is cooking for you but also learns cooking so he can impress your family aka getting easy access as son in law “you know you should hurry up and propose to me” he said while serving you his ‘special meal’ he cooked for you “I plan on wifing you up real soon don’t worry” he is shocked but you don’t if its from proposing him real soon or calling him your wife lol.

iv. . .𝐒𝐔𝐍𝐆𝐇𝐎𝐎𝐍 : stretches in front of you, makes sure he flexes his biceps, his abs, and then winks at you thinking himself as irresistible, he is but you mostly give him a deadpan look even though you feel you heart beating 120km/h but you try not to inflate his already inflated ego “like what you see” “not really” looks at you in disbelief “yeah keep lying but you can’t deny my handsomeness” “yeah that I can’t” you said because it looked like he would cry any moment 

v. . .𝐒𝐔𝐍𝐎𝐎 : calls you randomly to say ‘i love you’, kim sunoo doesn’t care about the time to call you and say that he loves you, whether it be 3 am he would call you, in school passes you random sticky notes and treats, sits and learns I love you in different languages and makes you guess it “ana ahibuk” looks at you to answer “did you use google translator again” — “guess the language yn” pouts and urges you to answer “arabic” stares at you blankly because he thought you wouldn’t know “how DO YOU KNOW THAT?” acts shocked for no reason “this is the third time this week so I memorized it”

vi. . .𝐉𝐔𝐍𝐆𝐖𝐎𝐍 : becomes strict, leader yang all the way through unlike others he doesn’t do this on purpose but it's just something about him being pissed passive-aggressive is so attractive so you do stuff to make him pissed, I don’t blame anyone who makes won mad at purpose I mean have you seen him??!!! maybe a lil scary but it's still hot “correct your collar yn” you chose to ignore him “no” walks over to where you were sitting “correct it and if you can’t do it yourself then I would do it for you” at last he did correct the collar for you 

vii. . .𝐍𝐈𝐊𝐈 : bends down to talk to you, it started as a way to make fun of your short height but now he does that to intimate you/ make you blush “it's not funny niki stop” he bends down “oh I thought it was though” smirks on purpose, his main excuse is that he can’t hear from ‘his height’ so bend down to listen to you. smh I would kick him

lord of chaos chapters 7-23

“you [elayne] have a lion’s courage and maybe a fisherbird’s sense” that’s my girl!!!!

elayne and nynaeve always wishing they were as brave as the other is so wholesome

thom and juilin are not around because they went on a trip to amadicia. after being overworked dads to elayne and nynaeve for 2 books they decided to get married and are now enjoying a nice honeymoon conducting espionage together, good for them!

“the dragon reborn had no interest in the flyspeck village where rand al’thor had grown up; he was far beyond that” and then a few pages later when he sees the two rivers girls “[wondering why verin and alanna were poking around] was hardly most important anyway. these girls were from home.” 😭😭😭

if i were to record all the rand moments that hurt my heart in these chapters then i would just be copying out his entire pov sections into this post, so i will attempt to limit myself

i hate how desperate the two rivers folk are to make perrin their lord. wasn’t their whole culture about wanting to rule themselves and not having any respect for nobility? smh

alanna non-consensually bonded rand as her warder!!! holy shit!!!!!! given that i’ve been spoiled on so much, i think this might be the biggest shock i’ve had so far. i knew alanna was somehow sus bc people kept saying “i can’t believe the show made me like alanna” lmao but i was NOT expecting this!!!! how on earth is this plotline gonna play out???

poor poor rand. his freakout is so understandable and justified, but it hurts to see him losing it at the two rivers girls and scaring them. i doubt this would happen in the show since show!bode is too young to be brought to the tower for training, but imagine show!mat’s reaction to hearing that rand channeled on his sister and scared her so much she cried 🗡️💔 rand would be a dead man walking

“best that [the girls] wanted to stay clear of him. best for them. he just wished he could have talked a little while longer about home. a little while longer with them seeing only rand al’thor.” 😭😭😭😭

“it would be so wonderful to channel whenever she wanted. she never even noticed the tears that began leaking down her cheeks.” 😭😭😭 i wonder if nynaeve will ever get unblocked, surely she must for her own character development if nothing else, but on the other hand her block is a good way of making sure she isn’t too OP since she’s one of the most powerful channelers in the book (aside from rand, who has the taint on saidin keeping HIM from being too OP)

gawyn in his dreams seeing himself as less handsome than egwene thinks he is and her as more beautiful 🥺 fuck me that’s cute ok?

nevertheless egwene’s sudden internal declaration of love for gawyn is insane. last i heard she was conflicted between him and galad, and even then only very far in the back of her mind. she’s barely ever thought about him!

skipping a few chapters ahead but it’s relevant here: we learn that galad is rand’s half-brother (which i’d already been spoiled on), however, i’ve heard that the two of them never meet again for the rest of the series. so WHAT is the fucking POINT??? this is the problem with having so many characters and plotlines spread so far across the world. all the relationships become missed opportunities or dropped threads, or incredibly rushed to force a bond between characters who interacted twice 3 books ago. i would kill to have fewer plotlines in exchange for more characters being in a single plotline together more often. argh!!!!

**vague spoilers in this bullet point for information in future books that i’m not supposed to know about yet but do** “[in egwene’s dream] two ravens alighted on [mat’s] shoulders, claws sinking through his coat into the flesh beneath. he seemed no more aware of them than perrin had been of the hawk and falcon, yet defiance passed across his face, and then grim acceptance.” 😔😔 baby boy you deserve better (from the vague spoilers i’ve heard about your fate anyway). it is interesting that ravens are a seanchan thing as well as a dark one thing, if i didn’t know otherwise from spoilers i’d probably think that all these ravens in mat’s future meant he would become evil and join the dark one

“that awful amnesty of [rand’s] had been announced in cairhien, but surely no man would choose to channel.” do you think they can help it any more than you can, egwene? do you think it’s any less a part of them than it is a part of you? another entry in the male-channeling-as-metaphor-for-queerness list

the wise ones saying egwene has become like a daughter of their tents 🥺🥺 i will be very sad when she has to leave them and return to the aes sedai

“[gareth] might be cold toward [elayne] now, but once he had had a warm smile for a child and a pocket that always held hard candies.” poor elayne wants a dad so bad!! i hope she gets to meet tam al’thor someday. she probably won’t but she deserves to.

“[nynaeve] shoved her chin up in a ridiculous fashion so she had to look down her nose to see elayne” jsdkfjg ELAYNE i love you and your lack of self-awareness

“with the dragon scepter across his knees, rand lounged on the dragon throne” the Rand Bisexual Sitting counter has ticked up by 1

“my lord dragon, lord of the morning, prince of the dawn, true defender of the light, before whom the world kneels in awe” what a sexy list of titles

rand constantly thinking of moiraine’s advice 🥺

“even mat had the sense to stay away from a woman if he thought he would harm her” i feel like this is the nicest thing anyone’s ever had to say about mat’s approach to romance lmao poor mat

i am so conflicted about berelain. it’s hard to look past her predatory behavior towards rand and perrin back in tsr, and yet other women are so awful and slut-shamey to her that it makes me want to stan her out of spite. “[the wise ones] treated her as a woman of sense and respect, which made no sense at all to egwene...the mayener flaunted herself in scandalous clothes and flirted outrageously” maybe the wise ones aren’t so petty and shallow that they focus on the way berelain dresses over her intelligence and leadership skills, egwene.

i think i would like to see berelain get a real love interest who actually loves her heart and mind and not just her appearance. that would be very nice for her.

“he pulled one of the gilded chairs around to face her and sprawled in it, booted feet stretched out in front of him” Rand Bisexual Sitting counter up 1 more

“he looked so tired. and hard, hard enough to make the smile appear odd. he seemed harder every time she saw him.” “she had changed so much from the girl he grew up with...he had to think of her as aes sedai. it was saddening.” 🗡️💔 i didn’t care all that much about rand and egwene’s relationship in the show and i cared about it far less in the books, but man it hurts to watch it deteriorate

“whatever the car’a’carn wanted, nothing must happen to the only son of  a maiden ever to come back to them.” AAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHH

“rand thought that he would sleep well that night” LMAO famous last words

“[bael] had two [wives], which mat always said was either a dream or a nightmare and he could not decide which” rand really wants us to know what mat’s thoughts on polyamory are

we finally meet the famous elder haman! and loial’s mom! now i see where loial gets his hastiness from. speaking of loial, i miss him so much!!!

sad state of things indeed that going back to shadar logoth makes me nostalgic for the good old days. i want my ef5 back together goddammit!!!! i feel like my liveblogs for the whole second half of the series are just going to be me complaining about how split up everyone is

“rand stared north and west, not toward emond’s field, but toward the farm where he had grown up. when he turned away and opened a gateway to caemlyn, it was like tearing his own arm off” 😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭 out of all the rand moments that have hurt me, this one is towards the top. my whole chest is aching!! physically!!

mat’s thoughts about how hard it is to keep elayne and nynaeve out of trouble being interrupted by someone asking if he’s ever wondered what it would be like to be a warder SHOULD be foreshadowing and i am so MAD that it isn’t. i see your mat being rand’s warder AUs and i raise you mat being elayne’s warder AU! gimme!!

“if any two women needed looking out for less, mat did not know them” mat drank his respecting women juice “but no two were more likely to get a man killed because they would not listen to reason” mat spat out his respecting women juice

he’s so cute tho he’s like “i hope they’re okay. but also i hope they’re in trouble and wishing i was there to help them. not TOO much trouble though, i don’t want them to get hurt or anything! i just want them to miss me that’s all” when will these 3 admit they’re besties

every time mat’s habit of collecting cool rocks and feathers and shit is mentioned i receive +1000 emotional damage. and despite how accustomed he’s gotten to wealth, it’s still cool rocks and feathers and shit that he likes to collect instead of expensive items. he is my baby boy.

and olver collects things like that TOO AAAHHHHHH STOP!! MY HEART

“now he had saddled himself with a boy” accidental baby acquisition realness! mat, hugging olver tight and actively seeking out adoption papers: i can’t believe i’ve been saddled with this boy

~How They Comfort you: Mid-Fight Masses Headcanons~

~~~~

Still being a noob to Tumblr smh ✊😔

Enjoy~

~~~~ Sarvente ~~~~ ~Ladies first!~ ~The queen of comforting ~If someone's been mean to you, no matter what they said, she'll immediately reject it. ~"You're ugly" ~"YOU'RE THE MOST HANDSOME/GORGEOUS/CUTEST I'VE EVER SEEN IN MY LIFE!" ~"You're stupid" ~"What?! Are you serious? You're the smartest person I know!" ~She'll pretty much forcefully raise your self confidence. ~Sarv prays with you if you're feeling down. ~She'll be pretty clingy if you're sad or upset. ~Hugs. Lots of hugs and cuddles. ~She likes to hold your hand, especially if you're upset. ~If you're the type where you want to be left alone when you're sad, she'll protest at first. ~She doesn't want you to be alone when you're sad. ~She'll leave you alone after a bit. ~Tells you if there's absolutely anything you need, she'll do it. ~You want comfort food? She's got you covered. ~She puts most everything (other than is there's a Church service that day) aside for you. ~After the Church service she's gonna comfort you. Like, a lot. ~Even during the Church service, if you're there, she'll look at you repeatedly to see if you're okay. ~She's just such a cinnamon roll. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ ~~~~ Ruvyzvat ~~~~ ~Lol what does comforting mean ~He doesn't know how ~Like, at ALL ~If you're feeling upset or something, Ruv will feel guilty, but not say anything ~When Sarv comes along and gives you a hug and motivating words, Ruv figures out what it means (He knows what it means, he's just never done it) ~He'll ask Sarvente what he should do, next time you need someone to talk or cry to ~She's more than happy to explain ~So, the next time you're upset, he tries a bit. ~He awkwardly puts his hand on your shoulder and it's really frikin cute nrhwbg9f9ia ~You look up at him in shock because like-he's never done anything to be like "yo you good" ~He doesn't even make eye contact when he 'comforts' you ~Ruv sucks at comforting people ~He tries his best, though ~He personally doesn't like when people ask him what's wrong when he's upset, so he doesn't ask you ~He'll just rub your back a bit harshly ~His rubs grow softer as he comforts you ~"if you need someone to uh...talk to, you can talk t' me" ~Secretly hopes you don't want to talk about it ~Not because he doesn't WANT to comfort you ~But because he knows he sucks at it, so he'll probably make it worse ~But if you do want to talk about it, he'll listen, of course ~Doesn't know what the frik to say ~All he knows is that, if anyone said anything mean to you, he wants to murder slap them ~Usually says "you're fine", "you'll feel better soon", or "that's not true". ~He sounds careless, but you literally have absolutely NO IDEA how much he cares and wants to protect you and make you happy ~Ruv tries his best to comfort you when you need it, he's just not the best at it. He does love you, therefore he struggles to make you feel happy and at peace. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

~Love, PinkBoots

Heya xander, happy birthday!!(I know it's probably not your birthday yet for you but it is for me so >:D) Though I'm sorry I wasn't able to make you a birthday card—I didn't have enough time to make one (╥﹏╥) so I hope this lil short message will make up for it :'(

I really can't believe you're 19 now, really thought you were gonna be 20 at first ngl and that we've been friends for more than a year now! Time really passes by so fast, it's unbelievable(@^@)

And ever since last year, I'm just so glad to have met you online. It made my year way more fun with you around, and we're just cool ass crackheads together tbh😎

You're an amazing writer too and do you even know how much I love you and your stuff??? So much??? You're a wizard talented writer like please spare some writing talent and energy for poor lil ol' me😔🤲

And did I mention how handsome you are??? You take my breath away everytime I see your pics, I almost died once smh, almost damn near killed me—jkjk but ilysm you moron, happy birthday🥳 I'm really happy to have been able to be with you for two birthdays now. And hopefully I'll be able to be in your future birthdays too!💖💜

AWWW LEY, THANK YOU BUT YOU GOT ME SOBBIN IN MY BATH TOWEL 😩

You’re such a sweetheart, I’m glad I met you and your crackhead vibes and here’s to hopefully many more birthdays after this <3

No shut up, you’re handsome, don’t disagree >:( ❤️

1 - 5 for the Trash Son—er, I mean, Alexander. Thank you.

trash son!! 😭😭😭 hes a nice kid i swear 😪

I answered 1, 2 and 3 here and here !!!

04. What are their favorite traits about their lover? (one psychological and one physical)

IM !!! he's currently single 👁👁 but i'll say it for his latest partner aka mr xavier who appeared in one of my latest posts !!! one of the reasons him n alex got along as WELL as they did is because of how understanding xavier has always been.

so many ppl expect alex to be a certain way bc of a set idea they have of him, so when he shows his real personality he always gets comments like “why are you acting like this?”/ “you are happy today. that’s weird” / “you’re in a good mood?” so he gave up and instead acts like ppl expect him to. but !! with xavier he felt like he didn’t have to be like that 😔

physical ?!?!?! uhm ���� he thinks mr. x is really handsome 😳 probably his arms ew

05. Are they sexually confident or more of the shy type?

😳 yes sexually confident ✋ that’s how he keeps seducing ppl smh all the way from great brixton to windasia.

Yo whats up with his libido, I'm soo embarrassed for him jfc 😖

ikr, it's so embarrassing 😩...... I mean it's also kinda funny seeing him scoot around chairs and podiums and whatever else he can find to hide behind, and like, he's truly a medical marvel of a middle aged man (and yet Misha calls him limp spinach smh 🤥), but yeah I feel for him dude. Why did Misha have to be so handsome ✊😔

Henry's Instagram [HSOWAW]

*inspired by @/themadmonarchist, @/ghostpastey, and @/drownedinmoonlight*

*also credit to @/ghostpastey for inspiring Henry's username*

*feel free to add comments you want to add from your characters, just write it in the comment section below and include the post number as well please*

Left to right, top to bottom

1. The Black Forest is out of bounds kiddo (@/melophilia-c) Syn: good on you, creepin' in the forest 😈 Tavvy: @/sevin.deadly.syns u know it ;) Jyothi (@/crythin): You know curiosity killed the cat

2. Waffles for breakfast. So goooood! Svea: give them to me. now. Wesley (@/juliefel): you're such a Tumblr girl sometimes Henry: well excuse me for enjoying breakfast. It is the most important meal of the day you know! Jyothi: Any chocolate chip?

3. Little bro looking fly af at the Gala. Jyothi: He's so handsome Henry: isn't he though? Xander: . . . I'm transferring to Koldovstoretz Svea: YES! Lili can take care of you and I can visit all year long!!

4. Some muggle gala we had to attend with Father. -insert shameful bragging about how ridiculously beautiful my girlfriend is- Svea: Why is it shameful bragging? I am stunning. I'm shining more than the jewels on my dress. 💃 Henry: it's that kind of narcissism that really makes you endearing, älskling 😔 Jyothi: She's beautiful Henry: isn't she just? Don't tell her I said that. Svea: You know I can see this right? Henry: yes, but I don't want to add to your ego.  

5. Too many of my friends enjoy posing. smh (@ghostpastey) Syn: Ugh. hvitty smh Hvitty: I'm fly af - y not pose? Give the ppl what they want Syn: They want u 2 stawp 🤘

6. HBD YRH (@drownedinmoonlight) Svea: thanks pretty boy, I would've preferred a crown made of Swarovski crystals XP <3 Henry: oh, my deepest apologies your highness, I shall nip down to the nearest diamond mine immediately to fix this horrendous error :p Svea: And whilst you're there, grab a Fabergé egg for me too. 💎 Jyothi: So sparkly

7. My little brother is just so precious and cute!!! Xander: I'm your cousin Henry: stop saying that, you're breaking my heart! Xander: Your heart just pumps blood. Henry: TTwTT Jyothi: adorable he is

8. Xander's new cat, Gingerball. I would've gone with Catlyn or Mhaedros or Nerdanel, but that just me Xander: because you're a nerd Svea: not as adorable as Vhagar, and it's *Maedhros Xander: Storasyster, it's hard to make fun of him if you make being a nerd cool. Henry: Being a nerd is cool Xander: not when you're one. Jyothi: What breed is she? she's so fluffy Xander: he, and the breed is dork, just like Henry Henry: you break my heart lillebror Xander: only storasyster can call me that! Svea: damn straight, get your own nickname! Henry: stingy~ :|

9. I don't know what muggle drink this is, but it feels like I downed 30 Felix Felicis's Syn: That from svea's stash cause that's the good shiiiiii Svea: it's actually my Aunt's XP Wesley: ahah that's called being drunk dude Jyothi: I tried it once, tickled my nose

10. I don't think it was supposed to be so purple and glittery. Syn: where's ur sense of trial and error Svea: how did you fck that up? I showed you how literally yesterday Henry: 🤷 Jyothi: maybe you missed a step Henry: no, I did exactly what Svea told me to do. Svea: if you did everything exactly the way I told you to, it wouldn't be a eurovision stage effect. Henry: not EVERYTHING has to relate to esc Svea: YES IT DOES!! TONIGHT ETERNITY'S AN OPEN DOOR MOFO!

11. There's inter-house friendship, and then there's forced in-house friendship. (@/daily-donuts, @/drownedinmoonlight) Svea: no

12. I thought the House of Lords was ostentatious, and then I went to Enköping. Svea: 🤷