New M:I film: How does one deal with the isolation of being the person who tries to save everyone at the cost of your own quality of life; of being the one who survives while still having to watch most of those people get ripped away from you one by one? and then there's the existential threat of technology to the very concept of truth in our society.

Old M:I film: watch Tom Cruise climb a mountain for several full minutes for some reason and then fall in love with a woman after knowing her for A Day. then at the end they go on a fun lil summer vacation together. :) Emmanuelle Beart is married to Jon Voight. also look at this chewing gum that explodes.

Shutterbug

Pairing: Robert "Bob" Floyd x Reader (feat. Rooster and Phoenix)

Warnings: MDNI, 18+, SMUT, voyeurism, exhibitionism, nudes, dirty pics, general filth and explicit content

A/N: based on this post, thank you to @sebsxphia for the convo 💕 also, James Bond fucked so much because martinis make you horny as hell. gin is to blame for what follows, not me

_ _ _ _ _

Attraction tends to wane as time passes in a relationship. Couples need to be careful not to lose that spark. Bob Floyd didn't have that problem. His desire for you only grew, spiking after being able to call you his wife as of six months ago. He was grateful to have you, and even more grateful that you didn't mind the ways his lust for you manifested. Specifically, his shutterbug habit.

Bob had loved photography since high school, keeping his hobby alive even with his career in the Navy. The longer you had been together, the more you...inspired him. He had a few different albums dedicated to you, but only two of them were password protected.

The first was full of nude photos of you, raunchy videos of your lovemaking, and other explicit content Bob felt needed to be documented.

Somehow, the second album feels sleazier to him. It's all candid content of you doing things your husband decided were too provocative not to sneakily whip out his camera for. Common subjects in this collection include your ass bent over in miniskirts, close ups of your cleavage, and your pretty lips wrapped around anything vaguely phallic shaped.

Bobby told you about these photos and you were more than on board with it. It was thrilling knowing he wanted you constantly, even when you weren't trying. Sometimes you notice when his phone is aimed at you and put on a show for him, aiming your breasts in his direction or striking more provocative poses during your morning stretches.

Up until tonight, you and Bob had been the only ones privy to these.

_ _ _ _ _

A few hours into a Dagger Squad hangout at the Hard Deck, Bob found himself at a lonely table in the bar hunched over his phone. His thoughts had drifted to one of the most recent videos he had taken and he couldn't wait to get home to watch it again. He was so entranced he didn't notice Rooster and Phoenix sneaking up behind them. They noticed their friend's absence among the group, spotted him all alone, and wondered what he was so focused on. As they peered over his shoulder, both pilots' jaws dropped.

Bob was watching a video of you in a stringy bikini, laid out in your backyard as you basked in the Southern California sunshine, with your mouth wrapped around a cherry red jumbo popsicle. The camera zoomed in on your stained lips and hollowed cheeks taking the treat all the way down to the stick again and again.

Phoenix regained composure first and coughed to signal their presence to Bob. He nearly jumped out of his seat at the noise, hurriedly putting his phone back in his jeans. He turned to see his friends smirking at him and blushed in response.

"Who knew your wizzo was such a dog, taking sneaky videos of his wife like that?", Rooster teased.

"Can you blame him? Mrs. Floyd is a sexy little thing."

_ _ _ _ _

Upon returning home that night, Bob immediately told you what happened. He feared you would be upset or embarrassed someone else saw you like that, but after telling you he saw no indication of that on your face. Pink flesh poked out to lick your lips as your pupils dilated.

"So, um, did they say anything about it? H-how did they react?", you questioned.

Bob smiled at your sudden shyness and said, "Well they both looked very pleased at the whole situation...and Phoenix said you were a sexy little thing."

He heard your breath hitch and glanced down to see your nipples poking through your thin tank top. In an instant, he had your legs wrapped around his waist as he carried you to bed. This conversation could wait.

_ _ _ _ _

After a few rounds in the sheets, you were using your husband's chest as a pillow and unpausing that previous discussion.

"You're sure this is okay with you," you ask.

"Absolutely, sweetheart. I've always thought you were a work of art. It would be selfish not to let other people see," Bob teased.

Natasha and Bradley were at their respective homes and getting ready for bed when their phones pinged. They both opened their messaging apps to see they had been added to a group chat with Bob. A chat that was filled with assorted dirty photos and videos of you.

_ _ _ _ _

Rooster gets off twice: first to the full length popsicle video, and second to some domestically sexy videos videos of you. He learns about your habit of doing chores without pants, and sometimes in just your underwear. Bradley cums when he sees a close up of your ass bent over in a pair of cheeky panties while dusting a cabinet, and he makes a note to stop by unannounced during spring cleaning.

Phoenix gets warmed up that night with a few close up shots of your chest, particularly the ones of you in a tube top. She imagines how easy it would be to yank it down and expose your heavy breasts. Moving onto a video of you running at the gym, she admires your tits bouncing in a tight white sports bra. However, it's the video of you wearing a thong bikini Nat fingers herself to completion to. She finishes watching you put on sunscreen, squirting and smearing it all over your nearly nude body.

Both aviators fall asleep soon after their releases, satiated but very confused.

_ _ _ _ _

Bob is an absolute menace. Most people wouldn't guess it, but your husband loves to be a tease. Edging you was one of his favorite pastimes. That's why it doesn't surprise you when over the next two weeks, Bob sporadically sends out more of his favorite photos to Bradley and Nat. It's always late at night when he knows they'll be alone.

In the mornings, he sees them at work and behaves like nothing is out of the ordinary. Bob makes small talk and comments on the weather, as if last night he wasn't sending two of his coworkers videos of his wife dancing around in nothing but the top of his khaki uniform.

Bob enjoys teasing you with this all well. He's got you on your knees and gagging on his cock when he says through gritted teeth, "I bet Roo and Nix would love to see you like this. Makeup all ruined, tearing up, choking on Daddy like you were made to."

_ _ _ _ _

Like the first incident, Bob takes things up a notch at the next Hard Deck night. The bar was busy by the time you and Bob arrived. You spot Rooster and Phoenix, their eyes meeting yours immediately. They had been waiting for your arrival.

You and Bobby mingled for a bit before heading to one of the pool tables in the back. The two pilots across the bar snuck glances at you throughout the night, paying special attention when Bob leaned in close and whispered something in your ear. You gave him an eager nod before heading off in the direction of the bathroom. When you rejoined your husband, Bradley and Nat watched as you slipped something into his pocket before returning to the game. They were too distracted by the way your tits nearly spilled out of your top as you leaned over to take your shot to notice Bobby taking another photo.

Both pilots felt their pockets vibrate, opening their devices to find a photo of you bent over the pool table. Your skirt was hiked up just enough to see a glimpse of your bare pussy, glistening under the bar lights. Rooster bit down on his fist to keep from groaning out loud at the sight, while Nat felt a pool of arousal rush to her core when she realized you had given Bob your panties earlier.

They were now hyper-focused on your actions, no longer subtle about their gaze. Bob sent them a nod towards the back of the bar before leading you outside with his hand on the small of your back. Bradley and Natasha follow without hesitation, weaving their way through the crowds until they reach the back exit.

Nat's jaw drops when she sees her backseater on his knees in the alley, head partially obscured by the hem of your skirt. Rooster's dick twitches in his shorts at the sight of you against the wall, back arched with one hand covering your mouth and the other fisted in your husband's hair.

"Oh Robby! I'm so-so close!"

Bob's head peeked out, glasses made askew by your writhing hips.

"Keep quiet darlin', or we might attract some un-wanted visitors." You bite down on your bottom lip in response and turn to look at the two pilots. A bead of sweat drips down Nat's face down to her neck. You imagine what she tastes like as you cum on Bob's tongue. He laps it all up, taking his time suckling on your delicate inner thighs, before wiping his mouth on his forearm and standing up.

The two of you walk over to Nat and Bradley, your legs still wobbly from the mind-blowing orgasm your husband gave you. Bob notices Rooster palming himself through his jeans, clearly painfully erect.

In a voice too low and dark than his coworkers were used to, Bob asks, "If you two are free tomorrow, the missus and I would just love it if you could come over to the house. I need help with a little photography project. Does noon sound okay?"

The pilots nod mutely.

"Great! See you then," you nearly moan aloud, your body heating up at the prospect of what tomorrow would bring.

A/N: teehee just pushing the #bobfucks agenda

I don't have an actual question but pls post more about the Shade's gayest moments

oh happily. this list is long

the first bullet point here is just going to be about jay. just. everything.

okay that's not fair. what i mean to say is: that time he said "jay had wit and guile and wisdom. and that along with his speed made him a god." that time he looked at jay and joan laying together in an orchard and said "and then i saw him. and her. and the life i could never have." when he said "i enjoy you, flash." when he said that nowadays he only truly lives when he fights jay. when he said "but there was one moment... a lull in the fight, when our eyes met and we both smiled. and then jay punched me hard in the jaw. he was good at that." when he said "i enjoyed that recollection. i always enjoy recalling jay." do you see why i had to say "everything with jay"

oh and also when he said that he and jay had "crossed lances five times by now. and each a glorious joust." which is. definitely a way he chose to phrase fighting, for some fucking reason

when he reminisces about his friendship with sanderson in his journal and says that he'd been sad when sanderson killed himself--as a reminder, just because he couldn't bear to choose between the shade and his family, even though the ludlow canonically in love with the shade did still try to kill him--because after brian died, he'd "dared to like so few"

another jay one. that time ted mentioned asking jay about something and he went "jay garrick's coming to help? 👀"

brian saying that he thought he was "a mite swishy"

him saying he liked oscar wilde after he found out how alike they were

that time he said "[jack] was magnificent. he was fearless. he was perfection." i should mention that this is after he said that jack was his "understudy" in the "ballet" that was the fight against culp, and also that jack's internal monologue of the moment is him going "i am such a loser. i think i just peed myself."

when he lit a cigarette in his mouth and then put it in matt's mouth while saying goodbye to him. "i'll await your return my dear friend" okay dude

him covering his eyes when he sees jack naked in bed with sadie because the sight of all his tattoos might "inspire [me] to get some"

because i'm me, i can't not mention that he's constantly associated with black swans, a species well-known for homosexual pair bonds

and. as always

i could probably go on but we'll cut it here. "ambiguous sexuality" my ass, james

MINIONS: THE RISE OF GRU (2022)

Featuring the voices of Steve Carell, Pierre Coffin, Taraji P. Henson, Michelle Yeoh, Russell Brand, Julie Andrews, Alan Arkin, RZA, Jean-Claude Van Damme, Dolph Lundgren, Danny Trejo, Lucy Lawless, Will Arnett, Steve Coogan, Michael Beattie, Jimmy O. Yang, Kevin Michael Richardson, John DiMaggio and Raymond S. Persi.

Screenplay by Matthew Fogel.

Directed by Kyle Balda.

Distributed by Universal Pictures. 87 minutes. Rated PG.

I’ve somehow mostly missed the boat on the Minions phenomenon. Not completely, of course, that would be nearly impossible. However, I’m only vaguely familiar with them. I did see the first Despicable Me movie years ago, but honestly it did not leave much of an impression on me. I never saw the second or third Despicable movies (with a fourth on the way), nor the previous Minions spin off movie, or even the multiple Minions shorts like “Home Makeover,” “Banana,” “Yellow is the New Black” and “Cro Minion.” I also never caught The Minions Holiday Special which ran on TV.

However, of course I am aware of them: those walking chattering yellow capsules who wear overalls and goggles and are always getting into slapstick mischief and whose personalities seem to be made up entirely of the id. They speak their own language called “Minionese,” although it appears to just be a bastardization of several of the romance languages, such as French, Spanish, Italian, German, Russian and even snatches of English.

It would be hard not to be aware of them. They are nearly everywhere, from clothing to toys to theme park attractions to video games to coffee mugs to ornaments to night lights. They are in commercials – and not just for their movies, either, but for such seemingly unrelated products as Xfinity Wi-Fi and Liberty Mutual Insurance.

Honestly, I’ve never really felt the need to explore them much more. They seemed kind of ridiculous to me. They are, of course, but the surprising thing is that while Minions: The Rise of Gru is not exactly a classic or anything, it was actually surprisingly amusing. Considering the fact that this is coming from an adult man who is way outside of their target audience, that’s saying something. If I kind of liked it, I’ll bet most kids will love it.

Essentially, Minions: The Rise of Gru is a prequel (as was the first Minions movie) to the Despicable Me films, as you can tell from the title it is about a younger version of super-villain Gru.

The action takes place in 1976 and The Rise of Gru has a great 1970s soundtrack. (Although as someone who was alive in the 1970s, unlike most of Gru’s audience, I have to note that at least a few of the songs used came out years after the movie is supposed to take place.) The movie is a celebration of 1970s action films – from the James Bond-inspired opening credits to the Foxy Brown-esque lead villain Belle Bottom (Taraji P. Henson).

The story is silly, but you don’t really expect any different from a kid’s film. Gru as an 11-year-old boy is mesmerized by a group of super bad guys called the Vicious 6. He tries to join the group, only to run afoul of the bad guys. When he is kidnapped, his minions search to find and save him.

Like I said, not much of a story. However what is there is bright and shiny and moves quickly and in general is not – like so much modern animation – kind of obnoxious. The voice talent is also spot on, particularly Steve Carell as a pre-pubescent Gru and Alan Arkin as an aging supervillain who becomes his mentor.

If you are not the target audience, you’ll probably forget The Rise of Gru within hours after you see it. But credit where it is due, the Minions world is a lot of fun while you’re there.

Jay S. Jacobs

Copyright ©2022 PopEntertainment.com. All rights reserved. Posted: September 7, 2022.

Whoopsy daisy I made a Shadow and Bone random thoughts post:

The costumes in this show are impeccable. I was drooling over all the keftas and the ball gowns in 1.05 and the crow outfits. Hell, even the winter-camo outfits that Mal, Mikhael and Dubrov wore in 1.04 were amazing.

Am I the only one who isn’t surprised by the kruge pronounciation? Because I thought it would sound like how English people say Scandinavian words and I wasn’t wrong.

Coming in to this show as someone who had only read the Six of Crows duology, I expected to at least tolerate Malina based on the trailer clips. I kid you not: less than five minutes into the very first episode they owned my ass. That might be a new record for me.

Seriously the friendship? The pining? The finding home in each other and being able to acknowledge their faults and apologize to each other? Both of them having massive “fight me” energy and protecting each other? Hugs?? Why am I surprised that I ship this?

Some of those scene transitions/flashback edits were so good! Like I know they repeated that meadow scene a lot throughout the season, but the cuts from kid-Mal looking at the rabbit to grown up Mal psyching himself up for the fist fight? Poetic cinema.

The Darkling was horrible and I love it. He wasn’t a carbon copy villain, nor did his complexity redeem him. He was a perfectly complex and understandable monster and I am living for it. I have not been so happy to despise a character in ages and I genuinely bow in gratitude to both the writers and Ben Barnes, because I finally got to enjoy watching a character I did not for one second root for ( #writevillainswellagain)

Look I already loved Jesper in the book but his on-screen translation elevated him from a fave to the fave. I was worried that they would push him into a comedic relief-role, but he got to keep both his heart, his depth, and his humour. Kit Young did an amazing job bringing what was already a great character on page to an even greater character on screen and I once again applaud.

Am I a bit bitter that the casting had some interesting choices for certain roles (aka hiring light skin and mid-size actors for explicitly darker skin and plus-size roles)? Kind of. Do I think there are important discussions worth having about this? Yup. Do I also think that every actor hired for Shadow and Bone did an amazing job and deserve zero hate and massive amounts of love? Also yes.

I had Alexei for one episode and one episode only, and I still miss that poor sucker. This show did a surprisingly good job with making me care about a massive amount of characters considering the screen time they had and the amount of episodes this season had. Good job.

For some reason I expected Inej to be a lot more brooding based on how I perceived her in the books but I love what Amita Suman did with her. Her translation completely recontextualised everything I remember from the books and just brought this truly fresh character to life. Assassin with a conscience indeed.

Also I did love the Kaz we got in this season but I can barely contain myself as I wait for season 2 to be made and for a certain flashback to take place because that moment in the book was visceral and it stayed with me for a long time and I knew before the show announcement that this flashback could become a television moment. 

Speaking of Kaz the crows were so chaotic and messy and I’m here for it. Their interactions with each other and their improvised back-up plans were everything. I somehow didn’t expect the crows to become the comedic relief of the season but it honestly makes so much sense.

A couple episodes in I still didn’t get the Zoya hype (remember I haven’t read the books) but was a massive Genya fan. By the end of the season I was like “oh both of these girls are getting redemption arcs and I am here for it”.

Speaking of redemption I still don’t like Matthias. I’m sorry but I just don’t. I get that he is important to many and that they like his relationship with Nina, but I just don’t have the patience for him and feel like Nina can do better. I still want him to get a redemption... but maybe not through a romance with the grisha woman he repeatedly slutshames, is bigoted towards and chokes at least once (twice if that SoC scene from book 1 happens). That being said this is just how I see him, so feel what ever you feel about him and ship to your heart’s content!

Alina’s journey through this season made complete sense to me. It hurt to see certain things, but they were necessary in my eyes. Seeing her go from this essentially insecure but brave girl to a manipulated pawn to an even stronger and more self reliant girl in spite of everything was amazing. It did feel like a well-written hero’s journey and I’m looking forward to seeing where she goes next.

Apparently a lot of book-readers don’t like Mal (and I am not here to change anyone’s mind about that) but the Mal I saw on the show was amazing. I actually kind of wish we had seen more of who he was outside of his relationship to Alina (f.ex. other flashbacks than the meadow, maybe something about any of his missions while separated from Alina pre-show), but I also loved what we got of him with Alina. We still got to see a guy who was brave, stubborn, flirtatious, a bit judgemental but with a strong sense of humour, and a lot of loyalty (to Alina but also to his friends). I can hardly wait to see what’s next for him.

Milo the goat. Where do I even begin. Not only did we get that Jesper-scene, but their farewell actually became a Chekhov’s gun for Mal in 1.07? Milo is the true hero of the season.

Speaking of 1.07 I loved the tent scene between Alina and the Darkling. She both got to be realistic about her feelings for the Darkling and stand up for herself and for others and call him out. The way I interpret the Darkling, he is the kind of villain who creates a saviour narrative around himself but cares more about power than anything else. He’ll say he’s doing everything to protect his people but is the first to kill the very people he claims to love. And Alina’s tent-speech really hammered that in for me.

I adore Baghra. Is she morally dubious? Yes. Was she incredibly mean to Alina during training to the point where it might have been excessive? Yes. Did she not take any of the Darkling’s bullshit and act as the proper mentor for Alina when the Darkling had said that he was going to train her? Yes. Am I kind of a Baghra stan now? I mean maybe.

The antler-collar was so evil and gross but from a visually narrative stand point it was perfect. 

Also I still have no idea who David is but I want redemption for him too. Honestly I feel like half the supporting cast is gearing up for redemption arcs next season and I am excited for most of them.

Nina’s reaction when she hears Kaz on the boat? Priceless. Actually the whole boat scene from when she goes up on deck again to the cut back to the fold was priceless.

That being said the final scene had me even more ready for season 2.

Jesper kind of gave me messy period-fantasy James Bond? Does that make sense?

And Mal kind of gave me Lois Lane energy? As in he’s the mortal love interest that many assume is the hero/heroine’s weakness but actually functions as their emotional strength and inspiration? Am I reaching here or am I getting somewhere?

Mikhael and Dubrov. What a duo. Absolute madlads.

Also I’d like to see more Nadia if that is possible? Because the few scenes we had of her had me intrigued but then she sort of disappeared? Is she going to be important or was she just more of a temporary supporting character? 

I entered this show a casual Six of Crows fan with mild interest in Kanej and I finished this season a mess. A mess who ships Kanej and Malina and Genya with that David guy even though they had about 30 seconds of screentime together and Zoya with redemption and Jesper with main-character status (hey we’re not getting Wylan until season 2 at least) and kind of those two Ravkan army guys and Nina with anyone else and Matthias with a better redemption storyline and the Darkling with karma! Also, a mess with a whole new set of comfort characters!

❦ boys & girls try to pretend | p.sh

❦ genre: park sunghoon x reader, fluff, semi-angsty?

❦ warnings: none (if there are any warnings I missed in relation to this post please let me know!)

“Boys and girls try to pretend

They’re not catching feelings

When they’re catching feelings”

❦ note: this was inspired by “boys & girls” by James TW, some lyrics were changed to fit the narrative of the story

As 7-year-old you looked at 7-year-old Park Sunghoon skating in the ice rink, there was a sort of air about him that had you curious about the boy. As most 7-years-old, the two of you were just gaining a recent awareness of what it meant to live life. Park Sunghoon knew the minute he stepped onto the ice that ice skating was his everything. He loved the thrill of it, the cold air, but most of all the freedom it provided. Over some hot chocolate, once he finally left the rink, the two of you got to talking which led to your parents exchanging numbers. Sunghoon wasn’t a talkative boy most of the time but his parents noted how he made an effort to talk to you.

You later found out that the two of you attended the same primary school but were in different classes. You found out one lunch at recess when you noticed some guys in the 3rd grade crowding over someone. Curiosity got the better of you and you wanted to see what was happening only to find out that the boy you drank hot chocolate with a few days prior was getting bullied. You stood up for Sunghoon, telling the bullies to “fudge off!” despite the slight fear you felt, the bullies left the two of you alone. The two of you spent the remaining few minutes of lunch together, bonding over a penguin plushie your aunt bought you as a gift.

It didn’t take long before the two of you became friends, a concept you’ve heard of but neither of you truly experienced until each other. The next year of school, the two of you were in the same class. Not only were you in the same class, but you hung out with each other outside of school, mostly at the ice skating rink where the two of you truly noticed each other. Some days you joined him in skating but for the most part, you preferred to watch, a habit that would continue in later years to come.

When you turned double digits, things started changing. You’d be entering middle school soon with more classes and newer people. One Saturday, Sunghoon was at your house and the two of you were having a Disney movie marathon. The scene of the Sleeping Beauty kissing scene appeared on the screen,

“Mama said that people only kiss when they love each other,” you found yourself saying as you glanced over to Sunghoon. You knew love in the form of warm breakfast and being tucked into a blanket but not yet in form of the scene where Flynn Ryder and Rapunzel were surrounded by lanterns on a canoe. Sunghoon looked at you,

“Do you love me?” he asked. He wanted to know your answer for some odd reason despite not knowing the weight of the question. With you, the feeling you gave him was something similar to the one he felt while on the ice but somehow different? You nodded,

“Mama said to love everyone.” Neither of you knew exactly what happened at that moment when Sunghoon made his way to you, your lips brushing for a second, no more, no less. Your first kiss was etched into the history of the world, one of billions of events that occurred that day in that very moment. The kiss wasn’t mentioned nor talked about after that day but the two of you were gaining an awareness of what it meant to be boys and girls.

“You’d talk about a certain boy

And he’d give you his advice

While you’d tell him what to say to all of the girls he ‘liked’”

At 13-years-old, things started changing between the two of you. You were given the talk about puberty with a new awareness of the “birds and bees.” Your group of friends increased, often teasing you and Sunghoon but neither of you paid any mind to it. Feelings of conflict often filled you when you noticing the differences in Sunghoon. The way he was taller, his hair styled differently, and the difference in the atmosphere when he got close to you. The things he did for you were done so in silence but were still actions that you noticed like how he’d give you your favorite bag of chips during lunch or how he waited by your locker to walk home with you. Despite realizing that you had a semi crush on Sunghoon, you were started to have feelings for a boy in your English class, one named Jaeyun. With no other person to ask, you’d talk about it with Sunghoon, often failing to notice the way his jaw clenched slightly or how his gaze grew colder. As a rebuttal, he talked about a girl in his English class and you’d give him pointers on how to talk to her despite the slight sinking feeling in your chest. You and Sunghoon had English class together but you didn’t know which girl he liked and you found yourself not wanting to know.

“As he watched you get close to him

He knew it was serious

Something inside lit up a fire

Can’t help if something’s changed”

You and Sunghoon as a pair started including Jaeyun somewhere down the line. Sunghoon found something else he wanted to do apart from ice skating which no one ever thought possible. He first asked you about it, preferring your opinion over any one else’s and while you were scared of losing your best friend you knew that this was something that’d make him happy. So, you told him to go for his dreams of becoming an idol. On the days that you and Sunghoon weren’t together, Jaeyun was there for you which lead to the two of you getting closer. One night, a rare event happened. Sunghoon’s practice ended early and the two of you headed to the ice skating rink. You decided to skate with him today, wanting to have his presence near you rather than watching from afar.

“You and Jaeyun,” you heard him say in a low voice as you skated. Your hands were linked, an action that was something you were used to with how long you’ve known each other that you didn’t think much of it.

“What about Jae?” 

“Are you two… together?” Unsure as to what he was truly trying to ask,

“We went to the festival together yesterday.” The festival was one Sunghoon was supposed to attend with you but couldn’t.

“Just the two of you?”

“Well yeah, since you weren’t there,” you answered. Sunghoon said nothing and you accepted his silence. He was so deep into his thoughts that he ended up tripping over his skates and falling. Because the two of you were holding hands, you were accidentally brought down with him. As the feeling of falling came over you, you waited for the impact of ice on your body but it never felt. Sunghoon let out a slight hiss of pain as you opened your eyes and saw that you were on top of him, his arms wrapped around you to protect you from the ground. His eyes settled on you with an emotion you couldn’t decipher,

“You ok?” he asked. There was something about how the two of you were settled within this moment, the close proximity of your faces, the cold temperature of the ice that caused it to turn a few degrees higher due to the newfound body heat you were sharing, and the way his arms felt so natural around you. A shift in your relationship occurred in this moment and while you both knew it, neither made the effort to acknowledge it. 

“We had so much to lose

But I kissed you anyway”

In the following weeks, you started drawing lines between you and Jaeyun. He didn’t exactly notice that you had a crush on him in the first place with how outgoing he was to everyone, but Sunghoon did notice. However, you drew lines with Sunghoon too as you saw how passionate he was with the dream of becoming an idol. Making an effort to state that you two were just friends despite how much you wanted to be more, Sunghoon allowed himself to stay behind the lines you drew out fear of ruining the foundations the two of you built your life upon. Weeks turned to months which turned to years and before either of you knew what was happening, Sunghoon’s dream of becoming an idol was within his reach. You cheered for him on i-land, and cheered for ENHYPEN when the members were announced. Due to Sunghoon’s newfound busy schedule and the responsibilities of life pressing on you, your video calls that sometimes lasted an entire day shifted to regular calls that decreased in time which turned to mere texts that became inconsistent. Constantly, you found reminders of each other whether it be when you saw a penguin plushy or were drinking a cup of hot chocolate. It didn’t take long before an entire year passed since you last talked to each other. Then, at 3 in the morning, Sunghoon showed up in front of your doorstep.

“Sunghoon?” you asked despite it clearly being him. 

“Can I come in?” For the first time in both of your lives, the silence was something you didn’t know what to do or say. Until finally, you took his hand and brought him inside. Sunghoon was gaining popularity and you didn’t want a box of mangoes being delivered to your doorstep anytime soon. His height towered over yours as you got a good look at the boy you missed more than you cared to admit. As his eyes settled into yours, his hand pulling you closer his arms wrapped around you. 

“I missed you, y/n,” he whispered. There was a gentleness only owned by Park Sunghoon when he lifted up your chin so that you were looking at him. Then, he tilted his head slightly.

“Boys and girls try to pretend

They’re not catching feelings

When they’re catching feelings”

Your eyes fluttered shut as you brought your hand up to his neck. The closeness of your bodies like the time in the ice skating rink where you fell on each other but here the process of falling for each other was truly starting to take effect. Kissing Park Sunghoon now, the two of you were boys and girls trying to pretend you didn’t have any feelings for each other. The only thing was that now you were no longer boys and girls like you used to be. And now, you were no longer pretending.

|❦ end of story, written by riri| |blog master list|

more fics: (the fics linked below are all fluff but the master list has angst)

|warm mornings (jungwon, written by junko)|  |you, jake, and layla (jake, written by riri)| |storms & ghosts (jay, written by riri)|

Bonds between us

I know I haven’t been posting much lately but I’ve finally been inspired and found the time to write this new Murderer! Ben Hardy series I am hoping to be working on. I hope you will all like it, feedback is always lovely to have.

Taglist: @lunaticspoem @butlegendsneverdie @langdonzvoid @jennyggggrrr @rogmeddows @radiob-l-a-hblah @rogertaylorsbitontheside @chlobo6 @rogertaylors-lipgloss @sj-thefan @omgitsearly @luckytrashgooprebel @scarsout @deaky-with-a-c @killer-queen-ofrhye @bluutac @vousmemanqueez @jonesyaddiction @ambi-and-sunflowers @milanosaurus @httpfandxms @saint-hardy @7-seas-of-fat-bottomed-girls @mrsalwayswritex @rogerina-owns-me @hellsdragon @im-an-adult-ish @crazylittlethingg @allauraleigh @onceuponadetectivedemigod​

Murderer! Ben masterlist

Summary: There are two sides to Ben, the dark side when he is at work, and the surprisingly loving side when he is with his family. But both Ben’s sides are tested when (Y/n) goes into early labour and their baby is premature.

(I’ve imagined this series being set in the late 60s/ early 70s)

Enjoy.

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"It's daddy, I told you he's home!" The squealing voice of the little girl caught the attention of the five men who were just approaching the front door to the vast home. The three year old didn't seem to understand how to regulate her voice yet meaning that she was practically shouting as if she wanted the whole neighbourhood to know her dad was coming home.

When the grey front door slowly swung open, Ben took two steps inside before he quickly shrugged off the large velvety black overcoat he wore day in and day out. The daily routine he went through had become second nature he no longer had to think about.

His hands automatically went to the holsters that clung to his shoulders but instead of removing the straps, he removed the two guns he always carried on his person. His wrists rotated and his hands moved behind his back, dropping the guns into the hands of one of his men who was walking in behind him. As soon as his hands were free, Ben's arms moved out in front of him to pick up his little girl who was unevenly running on short stubby legs to get to him.

None of the kids knew Ben carried guns on him and that was how it needed to stay. The moment Ben stepped into his home or even the moment he pulled in the drive, the guns were hidden away out of sight and reach.

When Ben stepped over the threshold of his home, he changed from the man everyone feared to the family man everyone adored. And the workers who went back with him changed from the fearing men who did as they were told to close friends of the family who were always there as friends, rather than workers to be bossed around.

"Hey there, princess. Miss me?" Ben pressed his curving lips to the side of Lilah's head, brushing her hazel brown hair behind her ear, noticing how thin it seemed compared to when he brushed his fingers through the boys' hair.

"I miss you! I told Beck it was you but he not believe me."

"That's because I'm early, where's your mum princess? I need to talk to her and make sure she's okay."

Ben bounced his only girl on his hip, brushing his crooked nose against her cheek to tickle her and make her squeal. He remembered when Lilah first started to speak properly, she would trace his nose and ask why it 'was bent.' The little girl didn't understand that Ben's nose was slightly bumpy and crooked because the bone had been broken far too many times when fighting and it had healed at a bad angle. Not that it messed up the look of his features in any way, it was only visible when up close but it fascinated Lilah.

"Kitchen, Theo and James are up in playroom." Lilah pointed in the right direction before she leaned her head against Ben, making a noise and a fuss of kissing his cheek. Knowing that when she did that, Ben would copy her and lavish her with kisses.

"Daddy, you're back, and you brought uncle Joey." The excited tone to Beckett's voice made Ben's lips curl up at the corners and he reached his free hand out to ruffle the familiar dirty blond hair that matched his own.

"Princess, go with Beck and stay with uncle Joe for me so I can have a word with your mum please."

A whine left Lilah's lips but she complied when Ben kissed her temple and set her down to her feet. He waited until she took Joe's hand and the two kids dragged him to go and find their brothers before Ben carried on to the kitchen. He knew without looking that Gwilym would be following him to see (Y/n) whereas the other two of his workers were simply here for added precaution and protection. Ben liked protection when he was home after a particularly bad day at work or when business was in full swing just in case they were being watched or followed. He couldn't afford for anything to happen to his family.

Ben would have been at work for a lot longer today but (Y/n) had called asking if there was any way he could come home because she wasn't well. And she never called when he was at work so Ben knew she must be rather under the weather to call and ask for him to come home.

He could do nothing but do as his wife requested. She was seven months pregnant and Ben didn't want to leave her home alone with four children to look after when she wasn't well, it would hardly be fair of him to do that.

"Hey doll... everything okay there?"

When Ben stepped into the rather large kitchen it didn't take him long to set his sights on his wife but when he saw her, he couldn't help how the panic spread through his system. (Y/n) had her forearms leaning on one of the counters near to the sink with her lower back arched out but it was the way she was breathing heavy and the pained look on her face that set alarm bells off in Ben's head. She had been in a bit of discomfort this morning but she had seemed well in herself and didn't look or seem ill or else he wouldn't have left in the first place.

Ben glided over the polished tiled floor to get to (Y/n), resting a hand on her lower back which he began rubbing soothing circles onto whilst his other hand rested on the counter to steady himself. He leaned his head down to try and get a better look at (Y/n) before she tilted her head to look up at him.

"I- I'm getting t-twitches... and I've been sick a lot..." (Y/n) lifted her eyes to lock with Ben's, seeing her silent message conveying into his eyes immediately when his own eyes narrowed and his lip curled up in distaste.

"Right... well let's get you sat down doll and if you start to get worse Gwil can ring the doctor and we can get you checked out. Joe's got the kids for now anyway." Ben's tone was concerning and loving and his calm demeanour made (Y/n) feel better already but she could see the look behind his eyes. The defensive, dismissive look that showed he wanted to ignore what she had told him and say that this was something else which they both were sure it just had to be.

When (Y/n) went into labour it always started as twinging pain in her lower back or her stomach and through most of their four labours (Y/n) had thrown up quite a lot or felt some kind of indigestion. She was hoping and praying this was not the start of labour because they were far too early and there had been no other signs or warnings of labour before now. (Y/n) had done nothing that would push her into labour this early and there was no reason for it.

But even if this was just her coming down with a sickness bug, she needed Ben here regardless so he could help her and help look after the kids.

(Y/n) let Ben ease her weight into his arms so he could straighten her up and try to guide her but the moment she took one step away from the sink a small but desperate murmuring noise escaped her lips. Her body hunched back over and her head almost hit the bottom of the sink as she threw up what little she had left in her stomach.

She felt Ben's arms shifting to circle around her waist, his hand smoothing over her lower stomach to try and settle the baby when he felt them moving too. He pressed his chest up to her back before he kissed the top of her head to try and calm her down because he could feel the way (Y/n) was trembling and whining, she never took well to being sick.

"Alright doll just try and breathe for me, shh, you're okay." He whispered quietly against (Y/n)'s hair when she started to moan, shaking her head as she pulled back from the sink.

He could hear how laboured her breaths were which showed she was still unsure if she was going to throw up again or not and she looked like holding her head up was too hard of a task as if her head weighed too much to lift. But before Ben even managed to say two more words, his arms tightened and went stiff around (Y/n) when one of her hands clamped around his and the other braced on the edge of the counter.

A sharp cry escaped (Y/n)'s lips as her head fell down so she was staring at her feet, her body pushing back into Ben's chest like she wanted him to hold her tighter and reassure her that she wasn't going to fall or become hurt.

"Doll- doll what's wrong?!" Ben's chin pressed down against (Y/n)'s shoulder so he could turn his head and look at her but the fright in her eyes was more than he could bear to look at. She kept pushing back into his chest like she wanted to mould against him or make him hold her tighter like she was going to fall or break but he didn't know why.

A huffed breath escaped his lips when he could do nothing but go down on his knees, slowly and cautiously easing (Y/n) down with him when all her weight fell onto him and she had no energy to keep herself upright. But the moment they were both down on the kitchen floor, (Y/n)'s hands went to cradle her stomach as a cry erupted from her lips.

"Gwil call the fucking doctor now!"

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Turning her head to the left, (Y/n) buried her face in Ben's chest, smothering a sob in his shirt as she wished this would end soon. All four of them had been here for near enough twenty four hours now and it was beginning to get to a point where it felt too much for (Y/n).

Her skin was blotched red and dotted with sweat, her body was burning up like she was sitting on a coal fire and she could feel nothing below the waist. Anna had stacked up pillows behind her to try and alleviate the pain in her lower back that had been hurting for so long now that it was beginning to turn numb.

Anna had also gathered some sheets and towels, spreading them on the bed ready and there was a bowl of warm water and a cloth on the table for if the doctor needed them. Although with (Y/n) burning a rather high temperature a jug of ice cold water had been brought in to try and cool down her burning skin. Everyone in the house was grateful that the doctor had arrived so swiftly and seemed to have the situation completely under control.

It had come as a great shock and a terrible worry for everyone when the doctor arrived after (Y/n) collapsed, only to tell them that she was going into early labour. (Y/n) had gone through labour four times already but none of those times had been premature, she had either gone into labour the week of her due date or a week late.

Ben's mother Anna knew what a grave business it was to have a baby this premature and she knew that it wasn't a good sign for (Y/n) or the baby. She was already burning a high fever and had had a small bleed earlier, if any complications arose during this stressful labour (Y/n) could deteriorate or have a haemorrhage that could endanger her health. Not to mention how badly the baby was going to be affected by being born this early.

Ben pressed his free hand to (Y/n)'s neck, kissing the top of her head repeatedly to try and calm her down because he could do little else but provide support.

(Y/n) tightened her hand around his own as she moved so she was leaning back against the pillows instead of Ben, wishing she could sink and disappear into the feathered pillows. She could feel Anna dabbing at her neck and forehead with the ice cold water she had just retrieved from the bathroom but as soothing as it felt, it made (Y/n) feel like she was going into shock. She tried to scream but it came out rather defeated from the lack of energy and the searing pain.

"H-how much longer?" There was such a pleading tone to (Y/n)'s voice as she looked over at the doctor sitting by her knees.

He had been her doctor since before she had married Ben and he was the one to deliver all four of their children. Any complication that arose, he took care of and he was so kind and compassionate as well as skilled and he always knew what to do. It was calming to (Y/n) that he was here right now when it was clear that this wasn't going to go smoothly.

"Not much longer, (Y/n). The head will be born soon." His voice was calming and his expression was nothing but concerning as he looked level-headed and in control. But it was Ben who could see the fear behind the elder man's eyes. He could see the panic about the situation and the fear that if this went wrong, he would be the doctor who would have to sign a death certificate. He did not want to be the one to declare Ben's child dead, not when he knew what kind of a man Ben was.

Ben was a killer, he was a mobster in the doctor's eyes. He made people suffer, he had men who were loyal to him both because they respected him but majorly because they feared what he would do to them if they weren't. He played on fear and loved to punish people who annoyed, hurt, or went against him. The rings on his fingers were forever polished and cleaned because of the amount of blood that got splattered onto them, half of the tattoos on his body were symbols or death counts and he gained most of his money from going against the law.

But despite all of this, there was some part of Doctor Lloyd that had a slither of respect for Ben.

Maybe it was because he had seen how Ben was when he was around (Y/n). He treated her like she was the only good person in the world, the only person he ever wanted to see or talk to or who was worth anything to him. Whatever was troubling (Y/n) troubled Ben, whatever she was happy or excited about made him happy. Her happiness was what he strived for and the love he had for her was the only kind of love he had, no one else could bring out the good in him like she could.

Their four children were no exception either. Ben may sometimes be harsh with or around them, but they were loved and respected and brought up in a loving environment contrary to the kind of life Ben led. He loved his family, they were the one thing that meant everything to Ben and the one thing he held dear to him. And for that, Lloyd held respect for Ben.

He didn't want to see (Y/n) heartbroken beyond repair from losing a child and he did not want to find out how Ben would react to a loss like this.

No one knew exactly how long (Y/n) would be in labour for, the moment the doctor arrived and confirmed that there was nothing that could be done to prevent this, panic spread through the house. Ben was admittedly one of the many people who thought that since this was a very early and complicated labour, and the added fact that this was their fifth child, it would be quick. But they had been cooped up in this room for a day, none of them having eaten, slept, washed or changed in that time. All of them were too preoccupied in trying to alleviate the pain and terror (Y/n) was feeling.

Ben had barely gotten back from being out with his men when (Y/n) had suddenly collapsed in pain. He had called his mum to come and help and most of his men had left whereas his close workers had stayed to help with the kids and in case they could help with anything. Joe and Gwilym were Ben's closest friends as well as working under him, they were uncles to the kids so it was only natural that they would stay and look after them so Anna could help (Y/n) and the doctor. 

But now they were getting very close to having their baby in their arms and Ben didn't want this moment to arrive. As long as their baby was still in the womb they had more of a chance and a hope of them being alive and okay. If they were born this early, it was unlikely they were going to survive.

"Come on now (Y/n), another push for me."

(Y/n) did as asked, pressing her chin into her chest as she snapped her eyes closed, trying to ignore the pain that was consuming her but it didn't work very well. She wanted this to be over, she wanted their baby to be delivered right now or for this to wait another two months so everything would be alright.

(Y/n) jolted at the sudden feeling of the cold wash cloth pressing against her thighs but the cold temperature against her skin did feel nice.

"Another sheet." The doctor's voice was stern and ordering compared to his usual calm and caring demeanour, giving away that now his nerves were getting the better of him.

This man had delivered countless babies, dealt with many surgeries and complications and illnesses during his time as a doctor. He had sadly dealt with babies and even the mothers dying during childbirth, but this time it felt different. There was fear tugging at his heart this time, he felt as if something horrifying would take place if the child or even (Y/n) were to die, especially whilst their lives were placed into his hands. It was as if he had been given something so precious and he knew if he broke it, Ben would break him in return. He was the best doctor there was for this situation and he was the only doctor the couple wanted but that was terrifying for the man of sixty. He didn't want to see (Y/n), a lovely young woman he had known for some time, go through the grief of losing her baby or worse still, die herself.

Narrowing his eyes, Ben dared himself to lean forwards to look at what was making the doctor's defences go up but his breath caught in his throat when he realised why another sheet was needed. The one beneath (Y/n)'s legs was stained with blood.

The doctor briefly locked eyes with Ben before he focused back on the task at hand. He scrunched up the bloodied sheet and threw it on the floor with the used towels and flannels before he and Anna made quick work of placing the clean sheet beneath (Y/n)'s lower half. The amount of blood (Y/n) had shed onto the sheet was not a good sign that this was going smoothly like they were all praying.

Ben kept his eyes on the cream coloured sheet that had been placed beneath (Y/n)'s lower half, his nostrils flaring as he locked his jaw at seeing how quickly blood seemed to soak into it.

"I need some hot water bottles prepared."

At the doctor's command, Anna left the room to find one of Ben's workers who could make themselves useful by getting what the doctor required. There were four of Ben's men in the house, Joe and Gwilym were here to be with the kids and the other two were here for added help and security.

"Ben..."

"Shh, it's alright love. You'll be fine." Ben hushed, pressing his lips to her forehead as he brushed a few strands of hair behind her ear. She interlocked their hands together as her other hand pressed to her stomach, wishing the pain would go away. She could hear the firmness in Ben's tone that implied he was going to ensure she would be perfectly fine and although (Y/n) knew Ben couldn't make sure that happened, the determination in his voice soothed one of her many nerves.

"Push again for me, the head's almost born."

Ben hooked his arm around (Y/n)'s waist to help her sit up, his other hand still interlocked with her own. He moved her so she was leaning against his chest as (Y/n) both moaned and screamed at the agony that was tearing through her muscles. Letting out a sharp breath, (Y/n) closed her eyes as she buried her face into Ben's neck, feeling him muttering praise against the top of her head.

"Okay, the head's born."

With a deep breath, the doctor leaned across the bed and grabbed one of the towels resting near to Ben, but when their eyes locked panic spread through Ben's nerves at seeing the blood drenching the doctor's hands.

(Y/n) started to push again on the next contraction like the doctor had advised but she felt like she was becoming lightheaded. Ben kept his hand entwined with hers but moved his arms so they were wrapped around her waist, holding her to his chest. A scream that couldn't be heard in (Y/n)'s ears left her lips as her body convulsed on the last push that seemed to make such a weight drop from her previously heavy stomach and relieved a weight on her lower back.

The doctor nodded at Ben, a silent signal that the baby was born.

With a deep breath, he rested the tiny, wrinkled baby onto the blanket on his lap, watching the tiny being curl up like it was trying to pretend to still be in the womb. He rubbed his hand up and down the newborn's back, keeping the towel tightly round the tiny newborn to make sure they didn't get a chill into their weak system.

"You have another boy." The doctor looked between the restless couple, one of whom was losing all the colour in her features as she was cradled by her other half.

"Is he...?" Ben couldn't find it in himself to say the question that had been plaguing him since the moment (Y/n) felt the first pain of labour. Their baby could have been stillborn, have any number of complications or illnesses from being this early or worst of all, could die as soon as the first breath entered their lungs. Ben didn't know which was worse.

He had three boys and one girl and somehow he just knew this baby was going to be a boy to make sure that his little girl stayed his one and only princess. Ben loved having boys, he loved little versions of him running around the place but his Lilah was his little girl that he doted on. But it didn't matter to him that he had won the bet he and (Y/n) had over the gender of their fifth child. He cared whether their youngest child was okay and if they were going to survive. They had never lost or come close to losing any of their babies and Ben did not want to start now.

"He's breathing, but very shallow... I'm afraid there is very little I can do for him. Time will give tell his fate."

The doctor made quick work of cutting the umbilical cord before he pressed his stethoscope to the newborn's chest, listening to his frail but beating heart. Very little in the ways of medicine could be done for a baby that was born early, opiates wouldn't do much but quieten the baby down and make the newborn less likely to feed which isn't what they needed. Any medicine would be too strong for such a frail baby, especially one who was only just born. Steroids may help him develop but there was no telling what it would do to his system when he was already do weak and frail. Hospital wouldn't be able to do anything but put him in a warm incubator to regulate his temperature and watch to see if the baby would survive or become too weak to continue fighting.

When there was a timid knock at the door, Anna was quick to retrieve the hot water bottles from one of Ben's workers before shooing him away from the room. Not wanting him to catch a glimpse of the couple or their newborn in peril.

"Right, the hot water bottles need to be placed around (Y/n)'s abdomen to help stem the bleeding. And one should be wrapped in a towel and placed against the baby's back. Take him and keep him warm, do not leave him for a second, he must be watched over, these first few hours are crucial."

Anna busied herself setting the hot water bottles against (Y/n)'s stomach, dotting one either side of her lower stomach and one under her lower back. The heat should help soothe her skin even though she was running a fever and it was hoped to help stem the bleeding.

But just as Anna was about to move and take the newborn from the doctor's waiting arms, she stopped in fright when Ben's hand held her shoulder to stop her.

"I'll take him."

Ben's voice was so stern but it was frightening to hear the way his voice cracked as he spoke. He wanted his boy, he wanted his baby in his arms to make sure he was okay and so he could look after him properly and personally. Ben loved his mother, despite their differences she was like (Y/n) in the sense that she knew exactly what he got up to but she paid no mind to it. She treated him normally like he was a simple family man and just like he was her son, she was here to love and help him and his family. But right now, Ben wanted to be the one to hold his baby boy for his first few hours and to watch over him in case he didn't make it.

Each time that Ben had held his children for the first time, the pride, love and overwhelming emotion that swarmed his usually black heart always made him breathless and teary. But it was how delicate, breakable and deathly sick his baby boy was that was making Ben want to cry. If he settled his baby boy down in a cot for even a minute, he could easily pass away without their knowledge. For the next few days or even weeks, the newborn was going to have to be closely watched and monitored, if he even managed to survive more than a few hours.

The hot water bottle pressed against the blanket was burning against Ben's left arm but he barely felt the heat, all he could feel was how weightless his son was in his arms. Theo had been a big baby weighing just over eight pounds, then they had James who was seven pounds eight ounces. Beckett was six pounds five ounces and Lilah was exactly six pounds. But all of them had been a loving weight in Ben's arms, unlike the baby he was holding now who could barely be more than four pounds if he was lucky. His head was small and his body was wrinkled and trembling. His hand could barely wrap around Ben's index finger.

The newborn was grey in colour with fluids and a substantial amount of blood coating his fresh but very delicate skin. Ben rested his youngest child in the crook of his arm, making sure he was supported and stable before he dared to dab at the newborn's skin with a warm, damp cloth. He knew to be careful, not wanting to brush his skin too hard and remove any of the delicate and needed layers, but he wanted to clean the blood and fluids from his baby.

It sounded as if his boy was trying to cry but all that came out was a cough that cackled like there was static in his lungs. But all that mattered to Ben was that he was alive and he was trying to stay that way, showing them he had a voice no matter how fragile it was.

Ben's eyes diverted from his baby to his wife when a quiet moan left (Y/n)'s lips and he realised it was because the doctor had given her an injection in her lower stomach.

The sheet beneath (Y/n) was yet again changed, meaning two sheets and God knows how many towels were now going to be burned with how blood-stained they were. That was nothing new to the family with Ben's line of work and what he got up to. Ben could see (Y/n) was still bleeding but it didn't look as substantial as it had been a few minutes earlier.

His wife had turned as pale and bleak as the damp cream ceiling above them, her eyes were half-lidded, swollen and red. Her lips were cracked and her breathing was going from erratic to shallow more times than Ben dared to think about. But she looked more at ease and she was no longer in tremendous pain. Anna and doctor Lloyd helped to ease (Y/n) so she was laying down rather than sitting up and they made sure she was wrapped up in blankets and the hot water bottles were soothing her scorching skin.

When Ben locked eyes with the doctor, he kept his tiny newborn resting in his arms and carefully got to his feet, moving over so he was standing near to the door to have a word with the doctor.

"I gave (Y/n) something that will stop the bleeding but she's lost a lot of blood, she needs plenty of fluids and any food you can manage to get down her. If her fever burns any higher or she suddenly goes cold and into shock then call me straight away. Other than that, she needs rest and to be taken care of which I know you will do."

"And my boy?" Ben gently moved his arms to motion to the newborn he was cradling.

"Ben, I- I don't think he will make it to morning, his lungs aren't developed enough and it's making breathing a struggle. If he makes it through the night then I'll assess him tomorrow and we can talk about further steps. I'm so sorry.."

Lloyd could see that his words had brought out the darker, defensive side of Ben that arose when his family were threatened. His upper lip curled in disgust and the way his emerald eyes darkened made Lloyd shrink before the taller man. Ben gave off a very worrying aura but right now with his nose crinkled, his lips snarling like a rabid dog and his shoulders hunched, the only thing making the doctor feel safe was the baby in Ben's arms that looked very out of place.

"I know you have to prepare people for the worst, but I don't want my son talked about as if he's a lost cause already. He's here in my arms and he's breathing so he is your patient and you have a duty to care for him now, not tomorrow or the next day. What can I do?"

Ben's son was breathing, his heart was beating and he was curling up into the warmth Ben was providing. He wasn't dead nor was he really dying, at least not yet, so Ben wanted to talk as if his son had the best chance of survival. He wanted to know what he could do to help, even if it was just something small or seemingly insignificant.

"Keep him warm, if his breathing sounds croaky then rub his back to keep his lungs going. If he makes it more than a few hours then a first feed will give you a good chance, don't leave him unattended even if he's sleeping always hold him. I'll be back tomorrow afternoon, unless you call me before then."

Ben nodded, turning his back when Anna moved to show the doctor out and thank him for all the help and support he had provided over the past day.

All Ben cared about now was the baby he was cradling in his arms who was breathing and whimpering into Ben's lower chest. The newborn was no longer trembling and his breathing was a little more even and paced, if still croaky and a bit forced. He was alive and he was settling in Ben's arms, he wasn't in pain or slipping away or already dead and that was all Ben could wish for right now and it was more than enough for him.

With a tired sigh, Ben eased himself down into the chair next to the window that allowed him to be within the sight of the moon but still close to (Y/n)'s side in case she needed anything and just so he could keep a watch over her.

He brushed his finger over his son's cheek, wishing that his touch would somehow bring colour to the flesh and that he could soothe his boy and hope he knew who was holding him.

"You're our fourth boy, you know. I've got an army of boys and one little princess to spoil and look after. We've had four babies and not lost any of them, I'll die first before losing any of my kids. You'll be okay."

My Musings About How BTS Made My 2020 So Much Better

I’m never one to do year end reflections like this, but I think I’ll make an exception for 2020, considering, you know, 2020. Plus, the New Years Eve content made me giddy.

I’ve known about BTS since either 2015 or 2016 (I first saw their videos in a Youtubers React video). I remember being impressed back then when I saw that their music videos had around 100 million + views (look at them now, lol). Since then, I would casually watch some of their performances or interviews, but never really listened to their work. The closest I got was when I became interested in RM’s solo work in 2018 (I really like his song Joke, and I stand by that). I think part of my interest in him was because he spoke English during American interviews, so it was easier for me to find a connection. Besides that, trying to enter the BTS world felt, well, overwhelming. There’s just so much content to get through. 

Fast forward quarantine 2020. It’s the end of April and I have been working from home since the beginning of March. Their carpool karaoke video with James Cordon shows up in my Youtube Recommended. The rest is history.

But seriously, that video is just so much fun, and it was really smart of the editors to include subtitles. Very few American shows will bother subtitling the members (at least early on), but they often say really interesting or funny things! I wound up watching that video every day for like two weeks. I then started watching them on other talk shows, which turned into watching interviews, to then their music videos, performances (hello Jungkook in the James Cordon Boy With Luv performance), funny compilations, and then other content, like Festa. One of the first videos I watched was their 2019 Festa. I had limited context for the members, and didn’t think I would actually watch an hour long video, but I did, and I enjoyed it. 

My May became a whirlwind of watching their content and listening to their music. Part of me was hesitant to spend so much time losing myself in their content, but as I reasoned, I had the time, and I was enjoying myself. I remember honestly laughing so hard as I watched Run, and by this point in quarantine, I had very little to laugh about. BTS gave me a route to escapism, and I happily took it. 

None of my friends are really into Kpop, but I felt so ecstatic as I fell deeper into this obsession. They would listen to me a little as I talked about them, but I did overall refrain from talking their ears off. (Now, whenever I do get to see them, I just give a simple update: “Still really into BTS, btw.”)

Point being, I devoured their content. Run, Bon Voyage, docuseries, concert footage, hell, I even watched American Hustle Life. As I learned more about them, I fell in awe of their success and individual stories. I’m honestly just so happy for them every day. I’m seriously amazed when I think about how much they have accomplished. About how hard they have worked, how many records they have broken, how insanely talented they are. They are truly global superstars, and they are changing the music industry, culture, and are leaving a huge mark in history. It’s just amazing. And what is also amazing, is that being happy for them makes me happy. 

Being happy for other people and their successes is pretty standard for me, but it’s definitely a sentiment that has heightened this year. This is a year where we need to spread happiness, as hard as that can be sometimes. But, getting this invested in a band is a new thing for me. 

I really appreciate their friendship and bond. I know it’s not realistic for them to be lovey-dovey BFFs all the time, but it is clear that they have an incredibly special, and rare bond. It’s something that I really admire. (The Vmin friendship was one of the first things I noticed, and led to me getting interested in the members personally). Being American, platonic intimacy isn’t really something I see a lot, at least on the mainstream level (and especially between men), and getting to see these men work together, laugh together, and express their love for each other is just so refreshing. I truly hope that they are happy with each other. It is so clear, that based on the crazy journey they have been through together, they have a bond that no one else will understand. They’ve said it themselves that, in certain moments, they can just look at one another and instantly know what they’re thinking. That is so valuable and special.  

Their work energized me. I started working on a major project in May, and I felt inspired by them. They gave me the energy to push through. Seeing them be silly while also working hard also helped me to accept myself and be true to my weird nature. I used to be pretty shy and reserved, and never posted online, but I started to adopt Jin’s philosophy of just doing what you feel like. Honestly, I felt the most alive in the first few months of quarantine purely because of them and all the energy I invested in learning about them and received from them. (And it was a welcomed distraction from the real world.)

It’s maybe a bit strange getting practically new content every day, but I have found that between official content and social media, there is always something to look forward to. It’s a part of my daily routine to check tumblr and look for updates. It’s something that has been so helpful as my mental health started to decline around August (I’m sure that with quarantine we’re all in the same boat). These past few months have been hard for me as I’ve struggled with the effects of quarantine and a developing complicated relationship between me, food, and my body, but at least I have had BTS to look forward to.

And I guess that is the point of this. I could honestly go on and on about each member and how I feel a special resonance with Jimin based on his gender expression, or how proud I feel of Jungkook every time I hear him sing and express himself, or how Suga’s First Love stops me in my tracks every time I hear it, but I’ve gone on long enough. What I’ve realized recently is that BTS gives me something to look forward to.

This year has been bleak. We all know this. But what is strange is that even though I have had my fair share of struggles, I also had a lot of self-improvement. Those first few months of quarantine, the energy I received from BTS inspired me to work hard on my major project. I took up learning Korean (I really like learning languages and have been working on Italian for years. I highly recommend TalkToMeInKorean). I started working out every day and actually have stamina to do physical activity (something I was severely lacking). I made strides in my professional life and am working strongly and proactively toward my career goals. Of course, even though I have been technically successful, I still can’t but help feel aimless and lost due to the loss of connection with my friends and peers due to quarantine. As Christmas day was ending, I realized that I had been using the anticipation of the holiday to get me through December. Once it was over, I felt sad. What more did I have to look forward to? The world is still generally terrible. In America, we’re still reeling from our terrible political and covid situation.

But today I realized, oh, there’s still BTS. Maybe it’s silly to say, but it’s true. Yes, I have personal and career goals I’m working toward, but we have to admit there is something so unique and fun about following BTS. That week in October where they released performances and interviews every day on Jimmy Fallon, plus bangtang bombs, was one of the happiest weeks I had. Like I said, their happiness brings me happiness. I look forward to following their careers for as long as they’re active, as well as their solo projects and careers. Honestly, isn’t it exciting thinking about all the great things they will do in the future?

The New Neighbour 1

PAIRING: Sirius Black x Reader

Series Masterlist

Sirius sat down at the table yawning. James was just back from his run and was making a smoothie for himself.

“Morin’” Sirius mumbled.

“Good morning.”

Sirius poured himself some coffee, making himself a sandwich.

“How many steps today?”

“14 K . It’s getting better, I am nearing the goal.” James said smiling as Sirius nodded.

“James, you are amazing, they’ll regret not having you on the team.” Sirius said taking a big bite of the bread.

“I know, I know. I just want to make sure my audition goes well.” They heard some fumbling and turned to see Remus coming out of his room with disheveled hair.

James sighed.

“Were you up again, reading all night?”

“In my defense, there were just 5 chapters left.” Remus said, boiling some water for tea.

There was a knock on the door and Sirius groaned.

“Must be the encyclopedia man. I’ve told him so many times we are not interested, yet he wouldn’t just listen.” Sirius got up fussing and opened the door.

“WE DON’T BLOODY NEED YOUR ENCLYCOPEDIAS! GET A HINT! …fuck off?” Sirius stopped yelling seeing a (Y/h/c) haired girl standing outside.

“Oh… hello?” Sirius whispered, cursing himself for behaving such in front of a cute looking stranger.

“I assure you I would not try to sell any encyclopedias to you.” She said with an amused smile and Sirius clenched his eyes shut.

“I’m (Y/n) by the way. I was moving into 18 B and thought I’d introduce myself.” (Y/n) said with a smile.

“Sirius.” Sirius said giving the girl a smile. He opened the door wider and gestured to his friends.

“He’s James and he’s Remus. We’re roommates.”

“James, Remus this is (Y/n) and she’s moving in 18 B.” (Y/n) gave a small wave, smiling at them.

Remus furrowed his brows.

“You aren’t (Y/n) (Y/l/n), are you?”

“The very same.”

“Holy shit!” Remus said widening his eyes. “I am Remus Lupin, we’ve conversed several times through mail?” (Y/n) gasped.

“Oh, hi! I adore your feedback on my books! Thank you so much!”

“I love them so so much!! Your poetry is a-amazing!”

James and Sirius watched the scene play before them in amusement. ‘Who the hell was this girl’ Sirius thought. ‘And how did she look so perfect in the morning?’

“It was so nice meeting you guys! I must go now.” (Y/n) said giving them all a tight nod.

As soon as the door closed, Sirius stalked towards Remus.

“Okay spill. Who is she?” Sirius asked.

“She’s a poet. She’s written so many books like- “Thinking out loud” and “Dreams and fantasies”. I’ve read them all and I know she’s a super sweet person. She always answered my mails, takes time to address questions and replies.”

“So are we just going to ignore the fact that Sirius straight up told her to fuck off?” James smirked at Sirius, making him release a groan. Remus laughed.

“Well, the encyclopedia man comes at the same time!!!”

“Is it only me or Sirius checked her out the whole time?” Remus asked James.

“Oh, he did.” James said looking towards Sirius.

“Sirius, can I request you to please not sleep with this one girl; because A: She’s gonna be our neighbor and B: I really like talking to her.”

“Not that it was going to happen, but fine.” Sirius grumbled.

***

You moved into your new apartment a few days later. The neighbors seemed to be very welcoming. And Sirius… well, he was hot. You put on some music and got to setting up the house. You had already got the shifters to place the heavy furniture into their specific rooms, so you had much lesser stress. There was a knock on the door. You frowned going to see who it was. Sirius, your new neighbor was here.

“I’m sorry. Was the music too loud?” you asked.

“Oh no, it’s fine.” He said shrugging. “I just thought I’d check up on you.”

“I was just setting up the house.” You opened the door wider so he could look in.

“Would you like some help? Me and James have nothing much to do and are pretty much bored out of our minds. Plus, bonding experience.” Sirius said gesturing between him and you and you let out a giggle. Sirius smiled widely, he loved that sound.

“Well if you insist,” you said.

Sirius went back to his apartment, and switched off the T.V.

“Hey!” James groaned. “I was watching that!”

“Come on, (Y/n)’s setting up the house and I offered we would help her.”

“You bloody never help cleaning this house and offered to help her set up hers?” James asked raising his eyebrows.

“Well I am being a good neighbor and you should too. Come on, get up!”

“You like her.” James pointed out. Sirius felt a blush rising on his cheeks.

“No, I don’t. I just want to be a good neighbor and do a nice thing.” Sirius said looking away.

“Oh my god, you do like her.” James laughed and Sirius glared at him, making him stop.

“Okay let’s go.” James mumbled.

“Hello there, neighbor!” James said as he came in and you gave him a warm smile.

“Hey James, are you sure you want to help me? I feel very selfish taking both of your time.”

“Oh shush. I am happy to help.” James grinned. “Wow, the colors are lovely!” he said looking around.

“Thanks!” you said opening up the lighting box. You took out the lamp, the neon lights and other fancy bulbs. Sirius and James were beside you, helping you clean them.

The three of you spent hours un-boxing, cleaning, talking and having fun. Strange, how with better company, work seems so much easier. Sirius constantly flirted with you, a thing you thought he did with everyone. He was apparently a fashion designer and James a fitness trainer and owned the gym named “potters”. You sighed opening the last box. Your paintings. Portraits of acquaintances, complete strangers and best friends. James and Sirius gasped as you took the canvases out.

“You draw too?” Sirius asked with widened eyes making you giggle.

“Yes. I actually love doing a hell a lot of things and hence take up only part-time jobs. I’ve sketched and painted as long as I could remember. All over the years, travelling to different countries, writing and working as a part time designer and editor; I kept the habit alive. Took out my canvas and brushes whenever someone seemed to pluck an inspiration in me.”

Sirius looked at the different canvas in awe. Was there one thing, you couldn’t do?

“You seem to have so many talents!” Sirius said softly.

“Ahhhh… well, thank you.” You said as you felt heat crawl up your face.

“Mate, look at this one!” James said pointing out the Jack’s painting.

“This is Jack. He owned a bar at the outskirts of Amsterdam. He was about 72 years when I met him. Never saw someone so full of life and energy. And he was pretty open minded too. Talked to depressed people at the pub, always leaving them feeling happier.”

James gave you a wide smile.

After putting up the canvases in the room you let out a long breath.

“Thank you so much, guys! Couldn’t have done this without you. Let’s go eat somewhere. Does pizza sound good? My treat.” You asked them, relieved that you settled in much faster than you had hoped.

“Well I can’t deny anything when it comes to you, my love.” Sirius said smirking and you blushed and widened your eyes slightly. You turned towards James, who grinned and nodded.

“You could call Remus too, if he’s not busy.”

“He’ll probably be reading some book right now. He loves doing that. He is actually an editor. Wait, meet me outside, I’ll call him” James said and turned to leave. You went in and grabbed your coat, keys and your purse.

Sirius was looking at a picture when you came back.

“Ready?” Sirius smirked. You nodded. He gave you his hand which you took it, giggling. Did he have to be so charming in everything he did?

Remus gave you a small smile as he saw you. You all went to the local pizza place laughing and chatting. They seemed to be very nice people. You hoped you all could be friends.

“And then he goes in and is like ‘whaaat’; and I am like, ‘bitch please, you knew this would happen’.” James recounted, making you snort. Your cheeks were already hurting with how much you laughed and there were tears in your eyes. As you all returned towards the apartment, you stopped by the ice-cream truck for some treats.

When you went to bed that night, you smiled. You felt happy after a long time, talking to genuine people, not someone who was all too intent on making a good impression on you.

The boys however grinned and smirked at Sirius. They had every well seen Sirius act differently around you.

“So, I saw someone watching (Y/n) as if she held the world.” James teased.

“Shut up, she’s just very nice and a really cute person.” Sirius said not quite meeting his friends eyes. Remus mock gasped.

“Never. Never have I heard in the last 12 years of our friendship, that Sirius finds a girl ‘just very nice and a really cute person’” Remus said air quoting.

“They are either: hot, really hot or meh. Did the sun rise from the west today or has our pretty little Sirius finally fallen in love?” James said cocking an eyebrow. Sirius rolled his eyes and sighed.

“Okay, I might like her.” he said pointedly.

James hooted and Remus threw his hand up in the air.

“Finally! someone he actually likes. What do you think Remus? Though I am happy for him, how long do you think before he messes up?”

“A week.” Remus said winking at Sirius, making him groan.

“I hate you guys.”

“You know you love us!” they laughed as Sirius went to his room shouting-‘fuck you!’

A/N: I’ve completed the series. I’ll be posting it everyday. Stay tuned. And this is my second series, the first one wasn’t much of a hit so feedback would be greatly welcomed! And ahhh... yes, prepare for some pinning

Here is a full translation of the interview featured in Max Magazine.

Original text by Andreas Wrede

This was a lot of work so PLEASE don’t post this elsewhere without credit. 

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This story with and about Christoph Waltz is a story coming full circle. A little more than 3 decades ago, a small group of editors and photojournalists, graphic artists and authors started developing the pilot for the first German issue of MAX, made possible by Dirk Manthey, the publisher from Hamburg’s Milchstraße, who knew the magazine from Italy, France and Greece. And who made me the founding-editor in chief. Three decades later, the derivative is released, thanks to publisher Max Iannucci. In 1990, Christoph Waltz was in an episode of “Der Alte”, among other things before he played the torn schlager music star Roy Black in “Du bist nicht allein – Die Roy Black Story” – but we will get to that later.

Now Christoph Waltz is an award-winning, internationally known actor, who won two Oscars for best supporting actor. That is unique for a German-speaking actor. Born in Vienna in 1956, he now lives in Los Angeles – if you want to play a role in Hollywood, literally, you must be present in Los Angeles. And during our conversation in a red, furry saloon of the legendary hotel Sacher in Vienna, he emphasizes, “Hollywood is always the goal”.  

The place is very fitting, considering Christoph Waltz grew up in Vienna, in a family that cultivated a great affinity for the work on stage for two generations. He says laconically, “You grow into a thing, you grow up with it, and thus, you acquire a familiarity early on, which you’d otherwise have to conquer with a lot more effort.” He often went to the movies from an early age on, but he spent even more time at the opera. “When I had time and had finished my homework, I enjoyed going to the opera.” Back then, a standing room ticket cost about ten Schilling, just a few cents in today’s currency. Little Christoph loved smuggling into the fascinating, secretive opera house.

Later he attended famous acting schools like the Max Reinhardt Seminar or Lee Strasberg’s Actors Studio with significantly less pleasure. “I didn’t like attending acting schools. They didn’t exactly broaden my horizon.” Christoph Waltz hardly found them inspiring. And when he received offers for movies and theater, he accepted them “instead of dealing and struggling with teachers”. He says this with few gestures and in an almost reporting tone, he has always trusted the energies inherent in him. He had his TV debut in “Der Einstand”, where he played a teenage delinquent. That was fitting, considering he continued playing roles which were different, unexpected, and specific, or roles he filled differently, unexpectedly, and specifically.

Christoph Waltz remembers his beginnings as an actor in the 70s a little wistfully. “There were still movies on TV, which were made as movies for television, as one dramatic entity.” Or when there used to be directors like the great Federico Fellini, who was “very, very specifically Italian in everything he did.” Christoph Waltz continues: “And because of this specificity he was able to reach so many people.” A phenomenon like Fellini is marked by obstinacy, nonconformity, and distinct individuality. However, some significant conditions also irritated Christoph Waltz, for instance, when he was hired for the Krzysztof-Zanussi-film “Leben für Leben” in 1991. “I wasn’t adequately informed about the conditions and backgrounds. And so, I found myself – surpsised – in front of a camera in Auschwitz.” How does one react to something like that? “Today, I would know how to react”, he stresses thoughtfully, “but today, that would be due to the self-confidence I acquired over the past years. Back then I felt: Now I’ve been hired for this film.” Alright, he adds, one grows through experience, some conflicts are worth going through. “It helps building character.”

Was the decision to play Roy Black a crystal clear one? Not at all, he responds smiling and closes his eyes for a second. “When my agent called me about it, my spontaneous reaction was: Complete humbug, and I can’t even listen to this music for three seconds.” It only became interesting for him when he learned that Roy Black originally wanted to play Rock ‘n’ Roll. Then he became interested in the tragedy of this character. And the thought that Roy Black’s wish was the desire for freedom and wildness, a wish many Germans shared, “which was inherent in the promising American machinery.” Although this freedom and wildness had always existed in Germany, lived out by people like Nietzsche, Schopenhauer, or Kandinsky.

“The film itself was great, but the marketing-weisenheimers managed to break this film. It would be a great cine film, but they advertised it as a sob story for television. Consequently, the real Roy-Black fans were disappointed, while the people who might have been interested in the movie judged: Leave me alone with this sob story twerp. Well, the weisenheimers are the weisenheimers, what can you do”, deems Christoph Waltz with a beautiful touch of Viennese sarcasm and barely noticeable risen eyebrows. One does not always have to instrumentalize the entire acting equipment with him. A few little cues are enough.

Many more films follow before someone calls from Hollywood and say he is supposed to participate in Tarantino’s Inglourious Basterds. In our interview he calls this his “Quentin-jump”, where he is at eye level with Diane Kruger, Brad Pitt and Michael Fassbender in front of the camera. “Tarantino, we mentioned this before, stands for specificity and authenticity, he has an eye for both.” Did Christoph Waltz go into this production with a lot of respect? “With great respect.” He remembers an encounter with Sylvester Groth in front of a theatre in Babelsberg. “Every Thursday, Quentin showed movies during preparation. Once, Sylvester and I stood in front of the theatre and we both said: Imagine this, now we’ve been doing this for so long and suddenly we find ourselves here.” Then we paused for a few moments and kept going: Yes, and despite everything, we’re doing what we’ve always done – what we do, because that is what we do.”

Before Tarantino’s office could call again, other international projects followed, like The Green Hornet (with Cameron Diaz, Tom Wilkinson, James Franco) or Carnage (with Jodie Foster, Kate Winslet, John C. Reilly). Then Django Unchained (with Jamie Foxx, Leonardo DiCaprio, Samuel L. Jackson). For his role in Django Unchained, Christoph Waltz wins his second Oscar for best supporting actor in 2013 and Quentin wins another one for best original screenplay. But Christoph Waltz remains humble: “The opportunities presented to someone for personal growth always come to you through other people.” Although the actor always makes a binary decision. “Yes or no. Am I going to do it or not.”

Can one also make the wrong decision? “You decide for one or the other and from that other possibilities develop, but neither is better or worse.” That was not any different for Quentin Tarantino or for his first film and its director Reinhard Schwabenitzky, who saw him in acting school. Christoph Waltz leans forward and says confidentially: “The essential chances and opportunities were those which were presented to me by another mind, by a great talent, through a vision, which came from another person.” Nothing more, nothing less.

Yes, humility is a virtue. But we do not want to conceal the fact that Christoph Waltz was the first German-speaking host on Saturday Night Live and that he received a star on the Hollywood Walk of Fame (No. 2536, 6667 Hollywood Boulevard). The quote: “And Hollywood is always the goal.” Is correct, “like others say their goal is to get into heaven.” Hollywood, heaven: “I don’t mean to compare the two goals, but the setting of these goals. Especially Hollywood has been mythologized into more than it deserves credit for.” In this respect, as a myth, it is always the goal. Please don't tell anyone Christoph Waltz is over-the-top - the opposite is the case.

During our exchange in the Sacher, I mention one of my favorite books on film. It is Peter Biskind’s Easy Riders, Raging Bulls – How the Sex-Drugs-And-Rock’n’roll Generation saved Hollywood. It says: „There is no worse career move in Hollywood than dying. Hal Ashby is now largely forgotten, because he had the misfortune to die at the end of the 80’s, but he had the most remarkable run of any ’70 director. After ‚The Landlord‘, in 1970, he made ‚Harold and Maude‘, ‚The Last Detail‘, ‚Shampoo‘, ‚Bound for Glory‘, ‚Coming Home‘ and ‚Being there‘ in 1979, before his career disappeared into the dark tunnel of post-‘70’s, Me Decade Drugs and paranoia.“

It can be assumed that this won’t happen to Christoph Waltz? “That is a good example for the mythologizing I was referring to”, he responds. “I would claim that a legend like James Dean probably wouldn’t have developed at all, had he not driven himself to death in his Porsche at such a young age. Who knows what would have become of Marilyn Monroe, had she not put an early end to her complicated life.” And parallel to Hal Ashby, there probably were thousands of directors, who would have been happy to pay their next rent – by working in their profession. It is therefor about comparativeness.

Onto another career step, the James Bond movie Spectre, in which Christoph Waltz portrays the dark Blofeld, a character, who appeared in previous Bond movies. How do we have to imagine that? One sunny day the agent comes along and says: “You’re on the list for the next Bond movie”? Christoph Waltz knows there are no rules to this, especially when it is something like James Bond. A series that has been at the peak of possibilities for more than 50 years.” The producers have a lot to lose, they have to look very closely. Not only to keep up the standard, they also want to be ahead of their time.

Was it intriguing to play this bad boy a second time? Is it about an additional nuance of expertly irony; is it about the myth that is Bond? “This was another unique opportunity for me”, says Christoph Waltz, “a unique opportunity to include myself into such an incredibly successful series.”  Now after Spectre, for the second time in No Time To Die – a title that can offer a bit of comfort in times of the world wide covid pandemic. And Christoph Waltz is in the Bond movie that will be Daniel Craig’s final Bond. “It’s his fourth Bond movie”, he counts, “the actors change but the role remains the same. Of course, the role acquires a different profile and thus, different facets.” But it remains James Bond. “And when a new actor gets the role, he has to fit into the role, not the other way around.” Once again, we will have to wait for this Bond movie. It will probably hit theatres in spring 2021.

It reminds one of Shakespeare’s Troilus and Cressida – we’ve seen it a dozen times but keep going to see it again. Nowadays you go to see the production, in the past you went to see whosit faithless. Speaking of productions: Are the demands towards a Bond director more extensive compared to other film projects? “Surely there are more things to keep an eye on compared to a low budget movie or an independent film. In productions like that, you often have to use the tools you have. In Denmark they had demands referring to this “, Christoph Waltz comments in a slightly mocking undertone. He means the group around Lars von Trier? “Precisely, they called it Dogma for fun, and the world took them seriously.” But that is part of it, right, part of the business.

Anyway, every little detail is carefully manufactured for a Bond movie.  And that takes, apart from a lot of money, a great level of expertise and many employees, which combine into a story on film. “Legions of people work on every pixel, not to mention the light and the meaning of the music.” With all this in mind, it’s understandable how appealing it is to be in a movie like No Time To Die. Christoph Waltz has a lot of praise for the director, Cary Fukanaga: “He always knew exactly what he was doing and we knew exactly, why he did this or that”. Audiences were able to see this in previous projects, like the brilliant first season of True Detective, where he directed all eight episodes.

Christoph Waltz wouldn’t be Christoph Waltz if he didn’t show his extraordinary talents in unconventional projects as well, like the show Most Dangerous Game (with Liam Hemsworth, produced for Quibi). “What interested me there? The new dramatic form, it’s a story in 16 sections, each section only eight minutes long. We’re dealing with a new form of storytelling.” Does it remind him of the continuous comics that used to be in US-newspapers a few decades ago?

“Yes, it’s connected to that – but it also reminds me of Charles Dickens, who published many of his novels as newspaper installments. In Most Dangerous Game the great story arch is not lost, the suspense is carried from one episode into the next. “That is a sleight of hand.” And for that he received an Emmy nomination, and it wouldn’t be surprising if he was to win the prestigious award one day. But he pulled off other sleight of hands in the past. Or how the New York Times says in a headline: “Christoph Waltz directing Opera, moves from Tarantino to Verdi.” Adding his old comment to this: “The full-blooded, juicy movie experience has a lot of operatic qualities. I’m not talking about the film music, but about the rhythm and color and phrasing.” After “Der Rosenkavalier” (Music: Richard Strauss, Libretto: Hugo von Hofmannsthal), which he staged at the Antwerp Opera, came Giuseppe Verdi’s “Falstaff”, his second opera there.

“I’m not a fan of the never-seen-before concept”, says Christoph Waltz. He agrees with Susan Sontag’s essay Against Interpretation – in opera, there is a fix story, and the music is the central transmitter of this story. Over-interpretations can quickly become “dangerous sliding tackles.” Waltz wants to avoid those. “I want to show what the composers and authors meant.” He stayed true to Sontag’s principle in all three of his opera productions, the third on being Beethoven’s only opera “Fidelio”.

He is self-critical enough, “to personally take the risk of failing.” What would be the alternative?

“I’m just an actor, now what do the music critics, who take themselves so seriously say? Some foam at the mouth and brawl ‘the movie-bod is interfering in the opera’.” He prefers the critics that are capable of formulating things between the lines. “When I read elsewhere, that the very thing I was trying to convey can be seen in detail, then I’m quietly happy about it.” Sadly, the live performances of Fidelio fell victim to the covid-crisis, but there was a TV-screening on ORF, which can certainly be called presentable with 11% of the market-share.  “During ‘Fidelio’ I first realized physically that music is a spatial experience.” Here fits another Waltz-quote: “Strip away anything that us unnecessary.” Ergo: Reduce the action to the interaction between the characters. That is an art he mastered to perfection in acting.”

For once, I could surprise the cleaned up, chatty, well-tempered Christoph Waltz with a little research.

In his birthyear, 1956, his fellow countryman Walter Felsenstein, founder and artistic director of the “Komische Oper” in Berlin filmed a version of “Fidelio”. To this day, it remains the only film adaptation of the opera. Probably because – so the actor quotes Felsenstein – “this opera technically is impossible to stage”, he says with aplomb, an attitude that suits him. In ballet an aplomb describes the ability to absorb a movement, the balance.

Christoph Waltz not only shoots a lot of movies, but he also enjoys reading one particular movie critic: Anthony Lane of the New Yorker. Surely one of the most sharpened critics, who outtalks someone or rubs the reader’s nose into his alleged ignorance. We start talking about Lane via a new movie by the fabulous Agnieszka Holland, “Mr. Jones” – referring to Gareth Jones, advisor to the former British Prime Minister Lloyd George. Jones uncovers that the devastating hunger crisis in the Ukraine in 1932/33 was exclusively due to Stalin’s exploiting politics. Anthony Lane writes in inimitable fashion: „Is it conceivable that Holland’s bleak, murky, and instructive film could prompt a change of heart in the current Russian establishment, or even a confession of crimes past? Not a chance.“ Greetings from Belarus.

And of course, we also talk about COVID, what does an actor do who can’t act during these times? Is he reading Robert Musil’s novel The Man Without Qualities, which has more than 1000 pages? “Oh, I’ve already attempted to read this three times. The first time, I got to page 200, the second time I got to page 400, the third time I put it away after 100 pages.” But he doesn’t fully abandon the idea of finishing it one day. “But that would really be a true accomplishment of discipline”, he underlines, allusively smiling. Less amusing is the current stagnancy in Hollywood, where Christoph Waltz lives with his wife and daughter for the most part. “It will be illuminating once things pick up again”, he ponders “will a reforming spirit take over, or will everything fall back into the old, ignorant patterns, or even cause worse?” The temporary dysfunctionality of Hollywood is comparable to a dysfunctional family, which mechanisms become especially clear during crisis. Now he visited his mother here in Vienna. I allow myself the question, “Is Vienna your home?” “Vienna is my home, home is something you can’t choose, like your parents. Everything else can become your center of living, all that is willingly moveable – but home, home cannot be changed at will.”

My top 10 Eurovision Song Contest entry songs:

So I actually started this list back last year but I'm so indecisive I couldn't settle on an order lol, but I've managed to rank my top 10 favourites now although the only one that is definite is 1 really, 2 - 10 are pretty interchangeable. I want to mention though that I only found out about Eurovision in 2014 so that was my first year, so I don't know a lot of songs before that other than a few I've seen in compilations on YouTube. I also like to see and hear the songs for the first time in the finals so I'm going by those live performances and not the studio recorded versions things like Spotify have, although those are all I can include in this post. Anyway on to the countdown starting with number 10.

10: Together - Ryan O'Shaughnessy - Ireland - 2018

I mean it's a gay love song, how can I not love it? Sure is a little sad but it's a beautiful song in my opinion and Ryan sings it lovely, and the accompanying dancers were great and not an over the top visual element like so many performances tend to be.

9: Sound of Silence - Dami Im - Australia - 2016

Another beautiful song and Dami hits those high notes perfectly, which so many people on Eurovision try and unfortunately fail to. Also another nice and simple stage performance.

8: Rhythm Inside - Loïc Nottet - Belgium - 2015

The first song in this list which I prefer the live performance to lol. Loïc singing while led down for part of it is no easy feat, plus he does an amazing ballet like spin which I love and wish I could do lmao.

7: Run Away - Sunstroke Project, Olia Tira - Moldova - 2010

You may know this one as the song with "Epic Sax Guy" lmao. I don't think it did that well in Eurovision, and to be honest I think I prefer the Spotify version, but it did get the recognition and appreciation it deserves...in memes lol. Can we also give a shoutout to the violinist though because that fast paced piece he plays at the start while being on a rotating platform is pretty amazing. Sunstroke Project also represented Moldova in 2017 with "Hey Mama" which I also like a lot and would be number 12 lol.

6: Heartbeat - Can-Linn, Kasey Smith - Ireland - 2014

Okay I have no idea how this didn't make the final, although 2014 was my first time watching Eurovision I wasn't keen on a lot of the songs, so I'll always be mad that Heartbeat wasn't one of them.

5: Spirit in the Sky - KEiiNO - Norway - 2019

I feel like people either love or hate this one lol, but personally it was one of my favourites in 2019 and came 6th.

4: Only Teardrops - Emmelie De Forest - Denmark - 2013

I don't really know what to say about this one other than I like it and think it's nice lol. It's one of those that can cheer me up if I'm having a bad day.

3: Heroes - Måns Zelmerlöw - Sweden - 2015

Okay to be honest I wasn't a fan of this one when I first watched/hears it, I felt like it won because of the fancy visual effects, but over the years it's grown on me and I do actually like the song, especially Conchita's cover.

2: Arcade - Duncan Laurence - The Netherlands - 2019

I think this was the first year since 2014 that I agreed with the winning song at the time lol, although there were a lot of entries in 2019 that I liked, but Arcade is a beautiful song sung by Duncan's beautiful voice accompanied by a beautiful less is more approach on stage and that's all the ingredients to what makes a winning song in my opinion.

1: Rise Like a Phoenix - Conchita Wurst - Austria - 2014

Okay before you come at me, yes I may be a little biased as it was my first Eurovision lol, but I loved the song and again simplicity on stage. I also felt like the song had vibes like a James Bond song which as a fan of that franchise helped me to love it, and it even inspired me to create my own video game mod where it would be used for the theme song lmao. Conchita was also the first drag queen I ever saw, and like many people I was very confused at the time (and not very supportive to be honest as much as I hate to say it, I was 14 and life was hard, not that that's an excuse to be hateful I know), but her message when she won I found very impactful and I love that she refers to the LGBTQ+ community as "The Unstoppables". I always love it when she returns in Eurovision, and I'm very glad her winning song is my all time favourite.

Thanks for reading this if you've made it this far lol, no doubt I'll be changing my mind again after this years contest (yay we're actually getting one) but I might also do some lists like "Underrated Eurovision songs in my opinion" or top 10s from each year before we get there, so if anyone would like those please let me know, and do share your thoughts too! :3

Congrats Mae!!! Can I have 🌿 with Thomas and Christopher? 💜

thank you so much!!! 

when Thomas was ill as a child, Christopher was essentially the only child of a similar age that Thomas really connected with. Because Gabriel and Cecily visited Gideon and Sophie a lot, they spent a decent amount of time together and bonded over their quirks and the fact they both felt like outcasts. They wrote to each other regularly as well.

Christopher was actually the first of the Merry Thieves to realise how Thomas really felt about Alastair. unfortunately, he did not realise how explosive this information could be. they were in the Devil one night, post Chain of Gold, and Matthew had been ranting about how much of a ‘wormy lying coward’ Alastair was when Thomas had come to his defence, albeit in a half-hearted manner. 

“Why do you like him so much anyway?” Matthew rocked back in his chair, wine in one hand and the other pointed at Thomas. Well, presumably anyway, because it was two inches too far to the left but Thomas gave him points for trying. 

Thomas just rolled his eyes and opened his mouth to explain that he didn’t like him, per say, just that Matthew was being, and always had been, incredibly unfair on him when Christopher piped up from his workbench in the corner.

“Because he’s in love with him, of course.” 

Several things then happened at once.

Matthew tipped back in his chair, his face a comical depiction of shock, and sent the wine flying across the room.

James got covered in red wine.

Thomas thought that his heart was going to give out.

“I- What? I am not. No!” He stuttered, his face matching the shade of scarlet James’s shirt had become. “Wherever did you get that from, Kit?”

James helped Matthew, who’s face was still slack with shock, up from the floor. “Matthew, you’re a bloody idiot, did you know that?” James mocked, laughter in his voice. “Also - yes, Christopher, what makes you say that?” He righted Matthew’s chair and helped him into as if he were an elderly man who needed assistance moving, then returned to his place at the table. Matthew’s face still did not change.

Christopher placed down his beaker and turned to face the rest of the Thieves, his goggles squint on his face. “Well, I thought it was rather obvious, is it not?” He walked over and sat down at the table, his hands gesturing animatedly. “You see, figuring out if someone is in love is just like trying to graph an experiment: you look for patterns, specifically in behaviour.” He looked around at the dumbfounded faces of his friends. 

“And... and what patterns are there here?” Thomas asked, hesitantly.

“First of all, you followed Alastair around at the Academy. Now, this could easily be dismissed as the quirks of a child but here it fits into our pattern. Secondly, you will not tell us what really happened in Paris. No, don’t try to argue Thomas, i know when you’re lying - or withholding information. Anyway, I happened to overhear Charles talking about seeing Alastair in Paris when I was at Matthew’s, I do not believe in coincidences. Thomas and Alastair were together in Paris. Third, Alastair is the only person Thomas would let see his tattoo. That’s a very intimate, private thing for Thomas, and the fact he’d share it with someone who is apparently a ‘stranger’ is very out of character for him. Hence I have to draw the conclusion that Thomas is, in fact, in love with Alastair Carstairs. And I have to say - i think they’d make a capital couple.”

Stunned silence. Thomas thought his jaw might hit the table.

Finally, Matthew blurted out “That is just preposterous! Never in all my days-”

“Shut up for a second, Matthew.” James looked at Thomas, his golden eyes filled with a mixture of curiosity and love. “Remember the last time somebody spilt wine? What is it with you lot and bloody wine, by the way - anyway, it was Thomas. When Matthew told us Alastair was moving to London.” Thomas felt too hot and too cold all at the same time. “Tom? Is it true?”

“I....” Thomas didn’t know what to say. Was it true? He didn’t know. All he knew is that he missed Alastair. Missed talking to him as darkness blanketed Paris, missed watching the shadows on his face change as the city illuminated itself around them, missed walking next to him and talking about everything and nothing. All he knew was that every time he saw Alastair, his heart seemed to beat that little bit faster and if he was next to him he longed to reach out and grab his hand. All he knew was that Alastair was the most beautiful person he’d ever seen, and that he wanted to kiss him, and hold him, and-

James’s voice, soft and comforting, brought him back from his reverie. “It’s alright if you do, Tom.” He looked at the faces of his friends: Christopher’s obliviously hopeful one, James’s small smile, Matthew’s - who had finally closed his mouth - that bore an open expression, one Thomas didn’t see all that often these days, that held so much love he felt his heart might burst. He swallowed thickly.

He stared down at his hands that were knotted so tightly in his lap that his knuckles were white. He could deny it again but, really, he found that he didn’t want to. “I mean... I might? I’m not really sure...” He bit his lip.

“What ho! Excellent!” Christopher ran to his workbench and began furiously scribbling in his notebook. “I was actually right! Of course, I knew i was, but the proof is always appreciated.”

James clapped him on the back. “Wonderful! I’m so glad you told us, Thomas.” Thomas grinned at him, feeling lighter than he had in months.

And then Matthew got up, a broad smile on his face, and came to grab Thomas by the shoulder. “Well! There’s a turn up for the books.” And then the smile was replaced a serious furrow of eyebrows. “I’m happy for you, old chap, i really am, but could you not have picked absolutely anybody else?” 

Thomas looked at him, his heart sinking ever so slightly, until Matthew threw his head back and guffawed. “Don’t look so scared! I’m joking - well, partially anyway - but whoever your heart decides to give itself to will be one lucky person. Even if it is sodding Alastair Carstairs.”

Thomas felt himself laughing too, and he felt like it was the first real laugh in an age.

okay, NOT a headcannon but inspiration struck and the opportunity was too good to miss!

Thomas and Christopher always get to read Lucie’s new writing: Thomas because Lucie trusts him to be kind but fair, and Christopher because he actually has a wonderful imagination that has inspired Lucie on more than one occasion. Anyway, after every new read, they get together and discuss what she wrote, how proud of her they are, and how far she’s going to go. She’s their little sister too, after all. 

From Lupin III to Inspector Gadget: Examining the Heirs of Arsène Lupin

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This piece contains spoilers for Netflix’s Lupin.

As Arsène Lupin, the gentleman thief created by Maurice Leblanc in 1905, is a renowned master of disguise, it is fitting that he has inspired a number of literary characters to take up his mantle. Arguably the most recognizable riff is Lupin III, a copyright-infringing, quasi-canonical descendant by way of Japanese manga and anime. Yet it wasn’t until Netflix’s new French mystery comedy-drama series Lupin—which reinvented the source material through Omar Sy’s Lupin and the lenses of immigration, racism, and fandom—that readers and viewers have truly been challenged to consider what it means to inherit, whether through blood or through books, an iconic character’s legacy. Consider this a field guide to the many different Arsène Lupins.

What is immediately intriguing about both Lupins is that neither is as white as the top-hatted, monocled thief that Leblanc created over a century ago. Assane Diop (Sy), the charismatic lead of George Kay’s Lupin, is a Senegalese immigrant whose father Babakar (Fargass Assandé) brought him to Paris for a better life. The lethal mix of elitism and systemic racism that they encounter via Babakar’s employers, the Pellegrini family, are what shape young Assane’s life into a revenge narrative, but also become tools in his career as a gentleman thief. Yet even Lupin III, created in 1967 by manga artist Monkey Punch (a.k.a. Kazuhito Katō), is introduced as the French-Japanese grandson of Leblanc’s Arsène Lupin. In the Lupin the Third Part II episode “The Southern Cross Looked Like Diamonds,” which concerns Japanese casualties of the Pacific War, Lupin discusses his dual heritage. Both adaptations add texture to their Lupins’ stories by not allowing them to move through society quite as smoothly as the original French thief.

That said, Monkey Punch’s Lupin III certainly benefits from a fair amount of family legacy by carrying on his grandfather’s and father’s reputation as a world-renowned thief, marksman, master of disguise, womanizer—you name it. He’s almost more of a reincarnation of the original than a descendant, with the only real change being the shift in period from the early 20th century to the swingin’ sixties. Monkey Punch also drew from Lupin III’s contemporary James Bond to enhance some of those darker and more adult aspects in the manga, while basing Lupin’s on-again, off-again romance with bombshell spy Fujiko Mine on D’Artagnan and Milady de Winter’s relationship from Alexandre Dumas’ The Three Musketeers.

According to a 1995 issue of Manga Mania, Monkey Punch had initially considered keeping the blood connection a bit more under wraps, having not obtained the legal rights from Leblanc’s estate, but was convinced to embrace the Arsène Lupin connections. While Monkey Punch’s adoption of the Lupin persona wasn’t kosher by copyright standards, it was also very much in the spirit of the character—asking for forgiveness rather than permission—as well as the creator himself: Leblanc borrowed Sherlock Holmes for a few Lupin adventures before Sir Arthur Conan Doyle realized, and only then changed the detective’s name to “Herlock Sholmes” for subsequent showdowns. Still, it did eventually backfire for him, though it also led to, fascinatingly, beloved animated character Inspector Gadget (more on that later).

Read more

TV

Lupin Part 2: 2021 Release Confirmed by Netflix

By Kirsten Howard

Perhaps the most beloved iteration of Lupin III is in Hayao Miyazaki’s 1979 film The Castle of Cagliostro. Monkey Punch’s manga cast Lupin III as a rather unsympathetic master thief: callous about his victims, a caddish ladies’ man who often harassed women he saw as little more than sex objects. While the anime quickly established a moral code—stealing from rich people who either deserved it or would not overly suffer for it—it was Miyazaki’s film that gave Lupin III real heart. In rescuing princess bride Clarisse from a Gothic marriage, he displays a surprising sense of chivalry, especially when the plucky girl wants to be his sidekick. Lupin’s silent agony over turning her down lends the otherwise carefree heist film a shocking touch of melancholy, and lays the groundwork for a more well-rounded Lupin III in future outings.

The Lupin III bloodline has extended several generations into the future, though none of these descendants made much of an impact beyond their respective adventures. First there was Lupin III Jr. (yes, that’s his name), the son of Lupin III and Fujiko, who only ever existed in the manga. Elusiveness of the Fog, the nineteenth Lupin III TV special, uses a time machine to jump ahead to 2883 and glimpse Lupin XXXIII, a.k.a. Lupin the 33rd, identical to his green-jacketed ancestor. He gets three whole lines and mostly seems like an excuse to show that thirty generations later, little about the iconic thief has changed.

In between those two there was Lupin the Eighth, would-be star of a 1982 spinoff created in collaboration between Lupin III studio TMS Entertainment and French-American studio DiC Entertainment. The Lupin VIII series would have jumped a conservative five generations ahead, with the familiar crew’s great-great-great-great-great-grandchildren carrying on the same names, traits, and rivalries and romantic entanglements. But when the Leblanc estate got wind of this Japanese/French collaboration showing up on their continent, they put the kibosh on the project; only the pilot was animated, and was shut down before vocals had been recorded.

Because TMS and DiC had already lost their investment, they scrambled to come up with a replacement for the timeslot. And so Inspector Gadget was created, with the trenchcoat-clad cyborg bumbling his way into viewers’ hearts. Despite his complete lack of suaveness compared to any version of Lupin, you could say that, in terms of staying power, Gadget was Lupin III’s true successor.

Yet while Lupin III had every familial and financial resource at his disposal to continue his grandfather’s and father’s work, everything Assane Diop needs to know he learns from a book. The Arsène Lupin books, which Babakar gifts him right before he is framed for stealing the priceless Queen’s Necklace from the Pellegrinis. Babakar’s arrest, guilty plea, and prison suicide leave Assane burdened with a strange inheritance of misfortune, words, and blood money—as Madame Pellegrini (Nicole Garcia) pays for fancy schooling he otherwise would not have been able to afford. Attending a prestigious academy is where he forges friendships with fellow morally gray criminal Benjamin Ferel (Antoine Gouy) and his eventual partner Claire (Ludivine Sagnier) and learns how to code-switch among his peers. 

Presumably, that upbringing creates the scaffolding of connections that allows him to move through high society, but his wealth and prestige in adulthood is all due to Arsène Lupin. Assane studies those books like religious texts, like instruction manuals, like the last connection to his late father. His obsessive fandom provides him the blueprints for foolproof heists that he enhances with his own experiences at playing with disguise. Though he does later employ prosthetics for his appearance as Twitter user Salvator, for the most part Assane doesn’t obscure his face. Instead, he trusts in his marks’ implicit racial biases that they will buy him as a deadbeat dad and immigrant janitor Luis Perenna, then not blink twice when staring him in the face as millionaire Paul Sernine in the course of the same evening. In prison, he literally counts on a white guard’s inability to differentiate between two black men to switch places with a prisoner.

Assane also continues his father’s tradition of gifting the Arsène Lupin books to his own son for his 14th birthday: Raoul (Etan Simon), French-born, mixed-race and equally enamored of the gentleman thief’s adventures. While it’s unlikely that Assane wants his son to make the same dangerous enemies, he clearly wants Raoul to see himself in the character—and to see his father, who understandably has difficulty showing his true self to anyone.

This by-the-book adaptation (Arsène Lupin entered the public domain in 2012) engages with the notion that anyone can embody an iconic character—that their skin color or class upbringing doesn’t have to match the original, that they don’t have to be a blood relation to inherit a persona. For all that Lupin III exists in his own right and will endure as a classic franchise, Assane Diop’s Lupin may be the truer heir to the gentleman thief’s legacy.

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Lupin is available to stream now on Netflix.

The post From Lupin III to Inspector Gadget: Examining the Heirs of Arsène Lupin appeared first on Den of Geek.

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Marda Loophole: TPB: Issues #7-12

Issue #7 – The Exodus Then: Mada opened her eyes to the inhuman sights and sounds of war Half-men strewn about Bramshott the RCAMC tent soaked in red gore Through the horror she saw her scarecrow the one she treated before Minus a leg he was alive and that was enough to lift her off of the floor Now: Mada opens her eyes to the fuzzy sight of 4 purple children overhead Siphoning energy from a radiant boulder their chant stirs her from the dead A tingle in her toes and sour taste in her mouth the Hole is as Dennis said He labours nearby as the kids stitch Mada together with amethyst thread With the dulling drone done the rock bathes everyone in its immortal hue The old wendigo’s cell unlocks in the uproar allowing her to slip through Before Mada’s blurry eyes the frailest child’s torn from the circuit and slew She can hear the rapacious wendigo sob as she reluctantly continues to chew The plaster walls of the outbuilding begin to buckle from the stone’s potency Suddenly Pope enters the Hole and descends the staircase with much urgency The doctor’s met mid-way by the limping wendigo who embraces him completely Mesmerising him with her wildfire eyes she gladly detaches his loins from his body Dennis returns to find the Hole in shambles with Dot eaten and Dr. Pope screaming He disconnects the kids and requests that Mada give the boys’ lives a new meaning One of the boys grabs a ledger while the other two grip Mada and they begin fleeing Dennis and the wendigo clash by the emitting mound soon buried under the ceiling South Calgary is silent for the first time since the 33 soldiers were secretly dosed But without the hum to calm them they thrashed 33 Avenue like a whipping post Possessed troops overturned the streetcar and chard the theater like it was toast Stiff pedestrians and sate scavengers guide Mada back to her husband Marc’s ghost She mourns over his blood-spattered prosthesis as one boy reads a shard of glass His brothers study the ledger as he peers into the sliver to see what’ll comes to pass ‘We’ll return when the streetcar does’ the scrying boy points to the upturned mass With crazed GIs loose Mada and her boys depart while a curious crow tails her ass… Issue #8 – The Wild Boys ♬♪♩♬♪♩♫♪♩♫♩♬♪♩♫♬♪♩♬♩♫♪♩♫♩♬♪♬♪♩♬♪♩ A gayageum plays notes from the concerto called Dorothea The ribbon of rhythm writhes on the airstreams over Korea Baroque tones stir the ancient visage which inspired its idea Eddying over the ocean to hover above a 33rd avenue pizzeria ♬♪♩♬♪♩♫♪♩♫♩♬♪♩♫♬♪♩♬♩♫♪♩♫♩♬♪♬♪♩♬♪♩♫ The melody meanders up 20th street pausing at its composer Three long-haired boys that look 10 but are very much older Standing before Currie Barracks Condo they are of one mourner The unrelated triplets commiserate over their deceased sister ‘I cannot feel her in there’ John the empath of the family confirms ‘I cannot reach her’ Robert retorts ‘all I hear is Dennis and worms’ Scryer James perceives future events but cannot grasp their terms ‘All I see is that the stone has been scattering its ill will like germs’ Treating the condo as if a gravestone they pay respect to her spirit With unkempt heads down the trinity are subdued for a moment Each recalls Dot, the Hole, the old woman then all begin to fidget John pulls a music sheet out of his shorts and whistles a snippet ♬♪♩♬♪♩♫♪♩♫♩♬♪♩♫♬♪♩♬♩♫♪♩♫♩♬♪♬♪♩♬♪♩♫♪♬ James and Robert join him in his performance of Dorothea No. 4 When done John tosses the concerto down onto the sewer floor As they skate through the Loop Mada’s name hangs in every store Coffee shops hum with anticipation over the 70-year-old folklore Around the corner of 35th avenue is where a hungry entity stalks A hefty shadow cast from a vacant lot that limps wherever it walks The boys are too distracted to notice the relic from Pandora’s Box Because a fireball is about to knock’em out of their graphic socksIssue #9 – The Vacant LotYellow barricades protect the rich soil within the vacant lotThough ideal for growth it’s contaminated by junkyard rot Comparable to the toxin that comprises Hausis’ blood clot An

inherit gift from her father and the affects it has wrought Over a century old she has been scarred twice by the stoneAs well Hausis has been forced out of more than one homeFrom her log cabin to that school and finally the catacomb A hole she fled full of a plum, revenge and astral syndrome Dark energy leached into her, those boys and the headless one Wendigo mixed with indigo and once again she was on the run But on the Rez her spirits calmed; she even adopted a grandson It was the last time she felt love as the Sixties Scoop had begun Hungry and hateful she hid her mercy and fed on colonial fears Hitchhiking Highway 16 in the 1970s she traded entrails for tears Retribution for her surrogate sisters who had began to disappear When the stone summoned her home she returned with souvenirs She settled in South Calgary and became a landlord to tasty tenants Bones buried in the vacant lot next-door while lying to their parents A cane sword to assist her limp and cutback on the slaying minutes Serrated steel dentures to masticate and absorb her preys’ essence A century old entity at last content with her damned life up until TONIGHT When her plums return assured and still ripe enough to enjoy a quick biteWhen her bone yard is deemed aseptic and police investigation is in sightHausis lunges at the wild boys only to be repelled by a nimbus of starlight… Issue #10 – The Above People CREEEAK! The tactless teenager forcefully opens the oxidized attic door In search of a white wig for her cosplay getup she stomps across the floor Rummaging through containers she finds something unusual in a drawer A thirteen-year-old letter that when opened clarifies exactly who it is for ‘Aline: It’s with regret and sadness that I write this letter to my daughter’ ‘I had to go to a dangerous place so I left you to be raised by your father’ ‘I never stopped loving you or dreaming of the day we would be together’ ‘When you are ready to meet amass juniper twigs and a magpie feather’ Elated to see her mislaid mother Aline flees the loft in her space-opera costume She sprints across 35 Avenue towards a vacant lot shrouded by juniper in bloom Ripping off a bouquet Aline is unaware that just beyond bodies are being exhumed She spots a pudgy magpie perched on the yellow barricade and plucks at its plume Clutching the vital items the Big Dipper shaped beauty marks on her right arm glows FWOOOOM! A blinding white light descends from overhead lifting her off of her toes Aline suddenly finds herself in a melancholy landscape of stars, clouds and shadows Before her sit 2 enormous Above People who enquire as to her odd-looking clothes ‘It’s for Comic-con’ she roars removing the wig ‘who’re you and where’s my mom’ Sun God laughs as Moon Goddess speaks: ‘We see that you were raise with aplomb’ The electric entities sizzle and pop as they struggle to alleviate Aline’s many qualms ‘Your father fell in love with our granddaughter: the Morning Star he wished upon’ ‘But she had to return to Sky-Country to rid it of the evil her mother had let loose’ Mother Moon details how Feather Woman disobeyed and iniquity was introduced ‘She moved the giant turnip that which protects our portal because she was obtuse’ Mother Moon adds she encased the dummy in indigo stone and made her vamoose That is the past but the portal remains open for dark matter to infest Sky-Country The same stuff brought down with the stone when it crashed in the 19th century Aline accuses her great-grandparents of killing her kin and for spreading villainy The Gods giggle at the allegation clarifying Feather Woman merely has an injury More gen is traded and a deal is struck: if Aline fixes the portal all will be forgiven Above People will help find the Morning Star and teach Aline of her nuclear fusion KRA-KOOM! A fiery comet crashes and Aline emerges from impact like a magician Gazing at the wild boys she states ‘You dudes are my gran and we have a mission’… Issue #11 – The Penultimate Sequential squares spread over an infinitude of glittering stars Panels parted by gutters spanning

centuries between the bars A billboard advertises Marc and Mada’s forthcoming memoirs Christened Marda; Loop denotes the superannuated streetcar Inset in the ad is a shot of Magpie gnawing on a decayed thumb bone Balanced on the sign she spots a bird below who was once well known Magpie cries: ‘Ain’t seen you since you left with THAT there veiled crone’ Alit next to Magpie Crow recalls his ghastly exploits beyond the stone ‘It was Hell’ he croaks ‘The screaming, the silence, the suicide attempts’ ‘It took HER forever to bond with THOSE boys and get over her regrets’ ‘Once she did’ Crow pauses ‘she spearheaded some tantalizing events’ Led by the ledger and scryed images they tracked the fiery GIs’ contempt While 7 indigo infected ones enlisted for Korea 26 settled in Forest City An innocuous epithet for somewhere death stalked the streets regularly Enclosed by thickets it’s where butchers would conceal a mutilated body ‘The Serial Killer Capital’ Crow yelps ‘We lured them out during the 1960s’ Crow clarifies that when the GIs moved there each become a major player: Mad Slasher, Bedroom Strangler, Balcony Killer + the Chambermaid Slayer Mada the bait, Crow the lookout, and 3 wild boys unified became the healer ‘In the forest we’d draw out the purple poison leaving the mortals tamer’ Mada’s nursing background afforded them a home and a baby-grand piano She worked while under pseudonyms the boys penned novels & concertos ‘Forest City was safe and we had obtained almost all of that fugitive indigo’ ‘Almost’ Crow echoed ‘We left for Korea in ‘81 on a plane from Toronto’ Magpie squawks sceptically: ‘And then miraculously back for the 70th Anniversary’ {Had it been that long?} the crone ponders {Why did they whitewash my tragedy?} The veiled woman below the advert grimaces then utters anachronistic profanity Stalwart in stance she shudders when the #7 rolls by renewed for the pageantry… Issue #12 – Giant-Size Finale The fixed indigo stone pulsates expelling the remnants of its space toxin Pumped into the faucets of 22 occupants of the new condo atop its coffin Dragging fingers thru mauve hair they’re rapt by the stone’s dim doctrine They riot inside the structure while outside Mada and her wild boys lock in ‘Try it again’ the costumed Aline guides from inside the infinite sealed loop She has juniper and feather in hand yet something is off within their group ‘That thing’s teeing me off’ Mada breaks from the ring and sits on the stoop The rebuilt #7 streetcar gleams in the parking lot next to an effigy of troops Suddenly…a service door opens and the old wendigo limps out of the edifice ‘You’ Hausis growls at Aline ‘You’re relations with that Metis bastard Dennis’ Mada perks up at the name of the man who inadvertently made her endless ‘Are you?’ Mada asks ‘She sure is’ Hausis sniffs ‘and it’s making me ravenous’ Incensed Mada bares the jagged indigo scar spanning the length of her collar ‘Dennis did this’ she states ‘and orchestrated the 1950 South Calgary slaughter’ Aline has entirely no clue as to what occurred because of her great-grandfather And before Mada can educate her the group is spotted by a police helicopter ‘Freeze Ms. Cranmer’ a voice booms as a squad car pulls up with guns drawn Hausis has been hiding since police uncovered the bodies she had feasted on Clotheslined and cuffed the 145-year-old Cree woman is beaten with a baton Aline, Mada and wild boys watch in horror as Hausis is tenderized like carrion The wild child named Robert tugs at Aline’s skirt pointing at the departing cop car ‘Dot’ the 80-year-old kid chirps ‘The hungry lady has carried our sister’s soul so far’ Mada is not their 4th because it is the frail child Hausis mauled like a chocolate bar ‘We need that granny back’ Aline barks at Mada who turns away rubbing her scar Aline suggests they take the idle #7 and propel it with a trick she has just learned ‘Can I borrow a feather from your crow?’ she asks of Mada who still feels scorned Crow leaves Magpie atop the streetlamp landing beside Aline his feathers formed ‘I am not getting on that ’

Mada repeats just as the crazed tenants emerge armed KRA-KOOM! The refurbished #7 streetcar rockets down 20th street like a fireball Crow and Magpie try to slow the tenants’ progress to the 33rd avenue mini-mall Meanwhile the #7 zips down the parade route until it hits the cruiser then a wall Everyone on the #7 is unscathed and so too is Hausis who’s eating a cop’s eyeball Magpie and Crow flutter in to warn everyone of the approaching horde of tenants The wild boys jump into action with a hand out for Hausis who sees it as penance ‘Doesn’t make me a plum’ she gripes grasping John’s hand as if she is pregnant As the 4 siblings unite clouds appear and a powerful deluge forms within minutes The first drop hits as the vicious throng reaches Marda Loop then the sky cries The drenched tenants lose their momentum as the mauve washes over their eyes The rain relents as does the horde but Mada’s inner ire cannot be overemphasized The wild boys embrace Hausis and in turn Dot whose soul has now been reprisedOnlookers have gathered at the site sad to see there’s no anniversary to reminisce Crow and Magpie peck at the injured police officers as Aline stares into the abyss She apologizes to Mada for her relative’s actions but asks for her not to be remiss ‘We cannot change the past’ she points out ‘But if you help us now we can fix this’The wendigo, the crone, the wild boys, the star-child and the scavengers all return Loitering outside of the Currie Barracks condo building hashing out their concerns Hausis has subsisted with the stone while in exile so she knows where it’s interned In the bowels of the sub-basement they find the ancient rock fading in a slow burn John, James and Robert the perpetual 10-year-olds encircle Aline and embrace her Hausis jeers as the boys kiss their kin then whisper in Mada’s ear: Goodbye Mother The siblings start siphoning the stone’s essence back; Aline waves Magpie’s feather Hausis and the boys convert to stardust they swirl around the stone and then enter Aline and Mada escape the building as the boulder flies backwards thru the nexus Its trajectory bearing straight for Sky-Country where it will rid the land of sepsis The portal is sealed and The Above People welcome Feather Woman and Hausis Back in South Calgary Mada stands in the quiet rubble no longer feeling headless ‘Wanna meet my dad?’ Aline asks of her lithe friend who nods producing a smile Mada calls Crow but he and Magpie are stardust in a constellation of their profile Unveiled Mada and neophyte Aline walk towards a rainbow after their long trial As both fade over the hill stardust diffuses and floats to somewhere worthwhile An End