Always you do things the most difficult way, and in the most painful manner. You cultivate a martyr’s complex, lurching from man to man, holding out your bleeding wrists so they might see how you hurt yourself. You brood in the shadows when all you want to do is scream, “Look at me!” You are too arrogant to win people over through effort. You expect people to notice you there in the half-darkness, and point and shout out, “There! There is the great Perturabo! See how he labours without complaint!” You came to this court as a precocious child. Your abilities were so prodigious that nobody stopped to look at what you were becoming.

Perturabo: The Hammer of Olympia by Guy Haley

Frollo: alright, where are the gays?

Jafar: over here

Frollo: no no, the really cartoony gays

Hook, King Candy and Ursula: YOOO HOOOO!! ;p

Frollo: there they are

Valley Team

We have some hard hitting journalism over on renderbomb.com

The top 10 current moustaches in the aew roster!

Spider-Man The New Animated Series

Season 1 : Jul 11 - Sept 12 2003

Favorite Pairings/Couples

Valley and Vanessa

Peter Pan and Wendy

Pinocchio and Alice

Mr. Peabody and Mrs. Peabody OC

Sherman and Penny

Terence and Tinker Bell

Sylvester OC and Silvermist

Buck and Fawn

Desmond OC and Iridessa

Sled and Rosetta

Derek OC and Cecilia OC

Lewis and Franny

Turbo and Sweetie OC

Sulley and Sonya OC

Mike and Celia

Lightning McQueeen and Sally

Reggie and Jenny

Classified and Cassie OC

Piper to Peter's car

Guys, I just found out I get to go to Indy PopCon in a couple weeks and meet Wes and Lucas from Time Force, Ashley from Turbo/In Space, and Strahm from the Saw movies!! I’m so freaking excited!

Can Ferrari fix their F1 turbo issues? With Scarbs by Peter Windsor

Following three turbo failures this year (in Spain and Baku with Charles Leclerc and in Austria with Carlos Sainz) the big question going in to this weekend's French GP at Ricard is: will the Ferraris be reliable? In this interview, originally aired on our Twitch livestream last week, Craig Scarborough explains why Ferrari should be able to make progress within the F1 regulations under the heading of "reliability fixes". Indeed, he says, there may even be some overall performance improvements... Images: Scuderia Ferrari With thanks to Jetcraft, the world's largest buyer and seller of executive jets www.jetcraft.com Follow Craig @ScarbsTech Watch our regular, fan-based F1 livestreams on Twitch: www.twitch.tv/peterwindsor Follow Peter on Twitter for updates about our Twitch livestreams and our latest YouTube videos: @peterdwindsor This channel supports the Race Against Dementia: https://raceagainstdementia.com #STANDWITHUKRAINE Nick: you're with us always via peterwindsor https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCPwy2q7BNjdLYu1kM_OEJVw

The crowd found this amusing. Perturabo scowled at them. He had not intended to be funny.

Perturabo: The Hammer of Olympia by Guy Haley.

I was trying to read a very serious moment in a fic but it got derailed by the mega turbo ass cancer post popping into my head and I had to stop reading to laugh

she's not even that old but she's already a classic

i love wade having unreasonable biological fears regarding peter's reproductive system. despite being conceivably immortal, and (as far as we know) incapable of pregnancy. the man is terrified of what peter's dick might be capable of.

(i think he plays on it because he knows peter is kind of scared of his biology too and wade wants peter to know how ridiculous that is.)

peter thinks his biology is freaky and he's embarrassed about it. he apologises for it. he's so sorry for being gross.

so i think sometimes wade doubles down to make peter see how ridiculous it is that peter's afraid of his own freaky body. i mean come on now. nobody has a freakier body than wade wilson.

[x]

so wade makes fun of peter for it. because he thinks it's ridiculous. it's all out of love. it's all out of love. he wants peter to know it's ridiculous that he's scared of his body. so he takes peter's fears and amps them up to 10000, so peter can see how ridiculous it is.

but, of course, in typical wade wilson fashion, he plays it so well, we don't know how serious he is or not.

Peter Turbo is homophobic

Not because of the normal reasons people are homophobic, but because he is gay and other gay men refuse to have sex with him

This is explicitly untrue. Peter doesn’t know how sex works, and refuses to understand it outside of the dictionary definition because he finds it disgracefully inefficient and biological.

This is a tragedy of sorts, because he has the juiciest ass and most obscenely huge schlong you could possibly imagine, but he doesn’t recognise the significance of it and no one alive knows about it at all.

Learn your Peter Turbo lore smh.

Gimme the pebus. I need the pebus. I want to call him daddy as he makes me a mommy.

-Cracks knuckles- Let's do this. LEEROOOOOY JEEEEEENKINS. Perturabo X female reader Summary: You are Peter Turbo's wife and you've given him a few heirs already. He wants more. Heavy breeding kink, mommy/daddy talk, Perturabo's iron within/iron without. ✦•······················•✦•······················•✦✦•······················•✦•······················•✦

"Good girl." The Primarch practically snarled in your ear as he held you pinned with his own body weight. One of his arms was wrapped around your torso, just under your breasts. The other was shoved under your belly and between your legs, holding your clit in a tight pinch while he fucked you. The rest of your quivering frame was stuck underneath him. You arched your lower half up as best you could, giving him easier access to your tight, dripping little hole. You felt his teeth sink gently into your earlobe, his voice more of a purr this time as he praised you. "Such a good girl. Taking me like this. You're going to give me another son, won't you?" There was a little flutter of excitement in you at the thought of him getting you pregnant again. He'd already done so thrice now, giving you three little boys that both you and him utterly adored. You'd be more than happy to have a fourth, and he seemed to be of a mind to give it to you. As if to emphasize his point he chose that moment to force another orgasm out of you. You felt your pussy spasm clench around his huge, thick cock and you moaned into the sheets your face was pressed into. He fucked you through the whole thing. It was a few moments before you could respond properly. "Yes daddy~♡." You managed to spit out between the whorish moans he was fucking from you. "Fill me up. I'll make you one again." Perturabo's grip tightened on you. Damn it all, but he was impressed with how well you knew how to get to him. Of course, two could play that game. "Poor girl. You're so desperate to have your little womb filled with my seed. You want that? You want me to make you a mommy again?" "Please!" "How could I say no when you beg so sweetly?" He grabbed your hips and you felt his massive balls slap you clit as he barely rode out his final thrusts before spilling in you. His tip nestled right up against your cervix as he came, spurting in hot, thick ropes of cum that filled you very quickly. You pushed yourself a little further down his cock, loving the feeling of him being completely hilted in you as he came. Wrapping an arm around you, he rolled over to lay down, not pulling out. Letting his still hard manhood remain in you and keep all his semen from leaking out. He cuddled you close to his chest, breathing hard. "I hope you knocked me up again daddy." You took his free hand with yours, twining your fingers with his the best you could. He pressed a kiss to your temple. "I'd be more surprised if I didn't. But..." His voice turned sultry again. "It wouldn't hurt to make sure, would it?" You smirked up at your husband, drinking in the sight of the naked desire for you in those ice blue eyes. "No, it wouldn't." You'd be more than happy to take him all night, and it seemed like you'd get your wish.

I VERY DESPERATELY NEED/Want Baby Primarch Mers. So Badly. PLEASE!

Ok! I"ll go down the list

1 - Lion - So, the temptation to make him part lionfish is incredible here. There's also the fact that IRL Lionfish are a huge problem in certain parts of the world because they are an invasive species in those areas, as well as incredibly deadly because of their poisonous spines. And considering how deadly Lion and his sons can be... Yeah, I think he's part lionfish. Specifically he has a deep green tail with silver stripes. His spines are black and gold and hold incredibly potent poisons.

2- ??? [REDACTED BY THE ORDER OF THE EMPEROR]]

3- Fulgrim - He is part Coral Beauty Angelfish, and has a beautiful purple tail that fades into a vibrant yellow color. Coral beauties (at least according to the quick google search I did about them) are an incredibly hardy salt water fish, and known for their vibrant colorations.

4 - Perturabo - is part Cabezon - which are known for being Stubborn Bastard Fish who Refuse To Move until they get their next meal, willing to wait days and even weeks before they get their next meal. Which is often other fish, which I feel fits Peter turbo pretty well. He has a pleated tail and fins that are a mottled steel and black color, with the occasional yellow stripe.

5 - Jaghatai - is part Sailfish - which are allegedly one of the fastest fish in the world IRL. He has a bright white tail with red stripes. His fins are also white with red stripes.

6 - Leman - is part Piranha. Not only are Piranhas highly predatory, they also are species of fish that school together. Like how Space Wolves almost always stick together in packs. Also, he still has fangs in this AU. His tail and fins are a lovely slate grey color with an iridescent shine to them.

7 - Rogal - part greenland shark! Cold adapted predator of the sea. Doesn't look like much but is an apex predator in the seas it lives in. He has gorgeous golden fins and tails with black spots.

8 - Konrad - part goblin shark. I didn't pick it just because of the name, but because it is a deep water shark (lives in darkness, just like a certain edgy primarch) that is rarely seen by humans. And. Well. Most humans who saw Konrad didn't exactly live to tell about it, did they? He has a deep blue tail and fins that are surprisingly slender. But powerful and he has a hell of a bite and many, many pointy teeth.

9 - Sanguinius - He has a beautiful silver tail and fin-like wings, as his mer-half is flying fish! Although I was super tempted to make him part-lamprey because of the blood-sucking aspect of him.

10 -  Ferrus - as per the suggestions of @angronsjewelbeetle @c-u-c-koo-4-40k and @i-am-a-dragon34 Ferrus is now part Dunkleostous, with dark grey fins and tail on his dorsal side and a silvery ventral side.

11 - ?? [REDACTED BY THE ORDER OF THE EMPEROR]

12 - Angron - part betta fish. He has striking red and gold fins and tail and will square the fuck up if the mood strikes.

13 - Roboute - there is a big temptation to go for the Ultramarlin pun, but I won't give in. What I am going with is part Ribbon Eel, as they have this really lovely blue body with bright yellow dorsal and ventral stripes that go all the way down their bodies. That and G-Man having a long tail to thwap his brothers with makes me giggle.

14 - Mortarion - part pufferfish. Prickly, defensive and poisonous. Can and will puff up. Has grey fins and tail with dark green spots. Spiny.

15 - Magnus: I am torn between making him part carp - because of the Japanese (I think?) myth about a carp jumping up a waterfall in order to become a dragon - which hints at Magnus' incredibly powerful warp abilities or an Abtu, which is a mythical ancient Egyptian fish, because Space Egypt. Thoughts? Opinions?

16 - Horus: Is part dolphin. Known for being very charismatic and charming, but can and will bully other kinds of sea life. Baby-Horus has a deep green tail with gold markings.

17 - Lorgar - I love the Parrot Fish pun suggestion by @c-u-c-koo-4-40k so that is what I am going with. His fins and tail are a deep red color with a silver shimmer to them.

18 - Vulcan - another excellent suggestion by @c-u-c-koo-4-40k for making one of the primarchs part barracuda! I have decided on Vulcan, rather than Magnus. Vulcan’s dorsal fins and tail are a deep green color, the ventral side is black. Along the middle where the two colors meet, he had gold spots.

19 - Corvus: Part of me wants to make Corvus either some kind of shark, or angler fish bc of his whole "sworn vengeance and eternally hunting after Lorgar post-heresy" thing but. Big E is also a being who loves himself some aesthetics and I don't think a part-angler fish boy would fit that. Perhaps part black-tipped shark bc of their stealthiness. Thoughts?

20 - Alpharius and Omegon: are color-pallet changed blue-ring octopi. Instead of a yellow body with bright blue rings, they have vibrant teal tentacles with bright silver ring-patterns across their tentacles and up the fishy parts of their bodies.

@egrets-not-regrets @the-pure-angel