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73647e · 1 year

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hey it's piano anon here to rant about life 😔 (it is all piano related though)

Just my brain short circuited lmao it's actually been more than 10 years I've been doing piano.

I hate playing piano so much I honestly can't imagine how you enjoy it. I mean, it's good you enjoy it, but it's been constant misery for me for as long as I can remember. When I was little I would fight with my parents about it nearly every day and now I force myself to practice but I hate it so much. Pretty much the only reason I can force myself is that I got permission to practice in a local church, so it's a way to get out of the house.

I have to be good at it because I'm pressured into doing the exams every year and I have to pass them. But I would be way better if I actually liked playing. I'm basically "bare minimum for my level" good but I'm in level 9 now :/ (I know that means nothing lol since there's so many different level systems but. trust me on this one)

My teacher is. complicated. She's the best teacher in the area but she's not good at being nice to her students lol. She would routinely make me cry until I stopped being capable of crying (which. 😬😬). I still want to cry tho

My older brother picked piano to learn when he was little and when I was old enough to have basic motor skills my mom signed me up too. Notice: my brother got to pick, I did not. My parents like to laugh how they had to bribe 3-year-old me to sit down and practice but basically that they forced me to play it because it's my mom's favorite instrument and also my brother picked it.

My brother is actually really good. Because he loves it. When he was 10 and I was 8 he played Wedding Day at Troldhaugen (and won international prizes for it) and I remember mostly being secretly upset about it because I wanted to be able to play it (and feeling really bad about being kind of jealous). (Whenever I hear that piece even now I nearly have a heart attack.) I tried so hard to like piano so many times over the years, but I just hate playing it. I've got nothing against other people playing it, I like quite a lot of piano music (except the overplayed ones lmao, I hate fur elise).

And like obviously the worst parts are learning new stuff and practicing but I hate performing too. I'm shaking the whole time and have to think about not only the million different things to play well but also like my facial expressions and stuff and like all the examiners and my teacher say i'm very Musical but piano does Not come naturally to me. I've improved at sight reading lately but my brain works in melodies, not chords and two separate hands and stuff. And I can't just learn how to make my brain work like that.

When I was 9 we played recorder at school. It's usually kind of an infamous childhood experience but I LOVED it. Long story short I was really good at it and loved it and since then I've badly wanted to play a woodwind. Flute specifically. But my mom makes fun of (pretty viciously) literally every other musician. Strings, because it's "squeaky". Brass, because it's "goofy". Drums, because she thinks they have dumb jobs. etc, etc. She's like that about everything though. I used to do piano competitions (my brother still does) and like everyone is a piano player there but 90% of the kids there are asian (we're not) and she's extremely racist about it and i'm just there trying to be grateful that at least she's not saying stuff like that in english.

Last year I tried to learn guitar. At zero cost to my parents. I found some pretty good free online lessons and used my dad's old guitar. Which was absolutely huge on me. I had to bend over it weirdly to reach the strings and it was so big on me it was hard to stretch my fingers to the chords lol. I tried to hide what I was doing but it's kind of hard to hide a whole large guitar. My dad was fine with it initially but my mom got really mad at me for wasting time and that I should be focusing on school and stuff and then my dad got mad at me too. I haven't touched it since.

If my parents would actually support it I'd definitely ask to try flute since I've wanted to for the last 4 years BUT not only would they probably not let me, if it didn't go well they would never let me do anything again and constantly use it against me. Also they would probably make me drop piano to do it (which yes i hate it buuuut I love music and piano is all I have since they also made me stop the singing lessons I was allowed to take for like 1 month and I've also been doing it forever so I'm kind of scared to lose it. if that makes sense.)

(disclaimer by the way. I am aware my writing tone in this whole thing is awful but I'm too tired to go edit it I'm so sorry )

hey piano anon!

from what you’ve said, you’re an amazing pianist and i am thoroughly impressed. i don’t perform or have fancy levels to categorize my playing, i just play for myself most of the time, and that’s enough.

but from what you’ve said, i don’t think you hate piano, but that you hate the environment in which you were raised with piano. first off, your mom kinda sucks, ngl. like i don’t like her. any parent that tells their kid that their hobby or experimentation (like your guitar playing, keep it up btw!) is useless, futile, a waste of time etc., just sucks all around. not to mention the stuff you said about the racism. rancid! but i think the competitive and rigid environment that you grew up in with your brother is the reason why you don’t like piano. from what you’ve told me anon, these issues run deeper than, “i hate piano”, and i would advise doing some reflecting and getting some psychiatric help if it’s available. it’s nice to talk to someone about stuff like this rather than deflecting it with not like piano.

as for your other musical forays, i say keep them up to the best of your ability! keep practicing that guitar, and maybe even ask your dad for help with it if it’s possible! i actually play flute as well, so i was pleasantly surprised to see that you’re attached to that specific woodwind! being a flutist is the music world equivalent of being a horse girl, and it’s absolutely wonderful. i’ve been playing flute since 5th grade, and out of all the instruments i know, it’s been the easiest to master once you get a feel for the technique. perhaps your church has someone who knows how to play and wouldn’t mind showing you some stuff?

anyway, keep everything musical up! always! music is one of the ways that people are able to stay sane, and it saddens me whenever someone violently doesn’t like one aspect of it, for whatever reason. take care anon! and you’re welcome to talk about piano with me literally anytime!

#sorry if there are spelling errors #or if i missed something #i’m tired and it’s early in the morning #my posts #ask

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jamiewintons · 2 years

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hi hi! I had some questions about Octavia! What’s her favorite ghost club? Has she come up with any clubs herself? I love her power!! Are there any other instances when she’s used it? How did Thomas react when he found out she took on some of his pain as he died?

Also both of our oc’s get together with Thomas at Christmas time! It’s the mistletoe right? So good!

- demontoucansam

Hey!! I'm so glad you're interested in hearing more about Octavia! I do really enjoy talking about her <3

(This got really long so under a read more it goes)

I think that for a long time, Octavia would have a lot of trouble actively participating in the clubs - she's very shy and would definitely have been diagnosed with social anxiety if she were alive today - though she did like to watch other people do their talks (Pat was always understanding, and makes sure to ask her beforehand if she's feeling comfortable enough to participate). After Alison shows up, she tries to help Octavia come out of her shell a bit, giving her strategies to deal with her anxiety, and she ends up participating in her first club. I imagine that she'd have a lot to talk about for food club, with all of the insane things that Romans ate. I think if they had a book club she’d enjoy that, because it’d (probably) be a calm, quiet environment.

She's definitely used her power on Thomas a few times when his wound starts to hurt, and if any of the other ghosts have pain relating to the after-effects of their deaths, she would want to help them too. She usually tries to stay away from living people as much as possible - they remind her of the rest of her life that she never got to live - but if she sees children in pain, it's much more difficult for her to just leave things be and she'd make an exception. I think that

I think when Thomas finds out the truth about Octavia's power, it would probably be by accident. She didn't want to tell him that she takes the pain on herself, because he wouldn't want her to get hurt and wouldn't let her help him anymore.

Maybe she's using her power on someone else when he's around, and the intensity of the pain catches her off guard and she makes a noise. Or maybe someone else knows (probably Robin, since he would have been around when she discovered her power) and lets it slip. But anyway, Thomas finds out and then he connects the dots; she was sitting beside him when he woke up as a ghost, his death didn't hurt nearly as much as it probably should have... he's very overwhelmed with emotion and he hugs her, like "You did that for me?". He thought he'd been abandoned to die alone, but there had been someone who cared for him right there beside him.

Of course, he's horrified that she was in so much pain, but the thought that she'd take his pain onto herself is also something that he finds strangely romantic, so he's very flattered at the same time. But after that, every time his wound starts to hurt he really tries to play it off like "No, no, my darling, it's nothing! I'm fine!", though he does enjoy the attention immensely.

Yes, it’s the mistletoe 💕

I imagine that Thomas realises he’s got feelings for her at the wedding, then spends all of his time trying to figure out what to do, and as Alison decorates the house for Christmas, he ends up deciding to try and catch her under the mistletoe. The problem is, Octavia doesn’t actually know about the tradition surrounding mistletoe, so she’s oblivious to the whole thing until Alison tells her what’s going on (and also Thomas has been acting weird and standoffish because he's been figuring out what to do, so she thinks he's mad at her). But they get their mistletoe kiss and finally confess their feelings to each other 😌

I'd really love to hear about your OC as well if you want to talk about them!!!

#ask #anonymous #demontoucansam #bbc ghosts oc #octavia x thomas #octavia (ghosts oc)#im tired so if this makes no sense im sorry #or if i missed something

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theblob1958 · 6 months

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people are saying do it scared, but you also gotta do it alone. you'll miss out on so much you want to do if you wait til someone will do it with you. do it scared and do it alone.

#missed out on a whole year I could have skated at my local roller rink because I didn't want to go alone #and now it's closed and I won't ever get that year back. sometimes you gotta do it alone if you want to do something

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lilysnotes · 2 months

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Busy brunch.

#good omens #my art #Aziraphale #Crowley #good omens 2 #good omens fanart #aziracrow #I forgot to finish Crowley's watch I always miss something darn

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notbrucewayne48 · 4 months

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"aphobia doesn't exist"

bitch literally not that long ago an aroace youtuber animator was insulted by almost half of its community for being it

#i did some research about it and found out that the problem was principally that she had previous experience in the romantic area #so people just didn't take her seriously and said she was lying #even though she stated multiple times that she wasn't comfortable in those situations #now things are more calmed but damn #mind your own bussiness #i believe she knows more about herself than you #sorry if i offended you with this comment but i hate how aro/ace/aroace people are always left behind #insulted and rejected because they “dont know what they are talking about”#or because they “just have to wait for the right person”#or because they are “psychopaths and they are missing something”#i love that animator and she helped me realise a lot about myself #and now that i know the context i think i will start making a list and killing aphobes one by one #aromantic #arospec #asexual #aroace #acespec

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aarchimedes · 3 months

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for context: I read the hobbit first over the course of two years when I was like 13, but I'm only now starting to read lotr. having a blast tho!

anyways, reblog if you feel like it 🙌🏻

#lord of the rings #the hobbit #lotr #hobbit #yeah guys idk i just feel like most people read it really young #but jolkein is really wordy and idk how y'all got through that at 8 yo #my attention span could neverrrrrr #obviously not as wordy as like. les mis. but you know what i mean.#lots and lots of context all the time. love that for his worldbuilding not so much for my hold on the plot #and yes i have watched the movies #i didn't completely miss the cultural zeitgeist #yay first time making a poll! if you vote or read my tags this far you are a gem 🫶🏻#edit: i realize i spelled tolkien wrong. i feel like this proves my point #but also i feel like thats something you spell with your heart and not your mind

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chloesimaginationthings · 1 month

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The secret good ending for FNAF ruin,,

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anniilaugh · 6 days

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”When we’re together, we have no weakness. No vulnerability. We perfect each other.”

aka @wellship 's ”20 Year Waltz” and their ”The God with no back” concept lives in my head rent free and forever loved💚

#the god business is a work in progress but hey if it works #zosan #roronoa zoro #black leg sanji #zoro #sanji #one piece #the god with no back #20 year waltz #the quote is SO GOOD bless you Landeg #fanart inspired by a fanart hehe #anniinart #traditional art #omg I inked something!!#kinda missed my brushpen not gonna lie #how gay can I make this? ...........yes.

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neytui · 2 months

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BeholLD MY TINKER HICCUP FAIRY DESIGN!!

Been having this on my head for a whilee and really wanted to give the desing a go. Why? I don't know, but a Neverland au sure it's fucking cool

#httyd #how to train your dragon #hiccup haddock #httyd hiccup #hiccup #art #my art #tinkerbell #psd thinking the design of the prosthetic was hard cuz I wanted to make it good #something that he would actually do #I'll give you guys a kiss if you know what the missing object is #ANYWAY CAN YALL RAMBLE ABOUT THIS SO I CAN TOO

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kathaynesart · 2 months

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The @tmntaucompetition is no place for a tiny tot to be left alone, especially with all these rowdy teens running amok. My heart just broke when I saw little Kid Leo crying, @angelpuns and @red-rover-au, and I knew Replica Leo's would too. Problem is they're probably going to be searching for a while cuz Replica Leo is looking for other unsupervised children. Oops.

This is in response to these couple of threads I've seen going around: COMIC 1 - COMIC 2 - COMIC 3 - COMIC 4 - COMIC 5

You kids need to all calm down!

#I'll be honest I just miss drawing my 30 something peepaw #been drawing just his 20 something self for a few months now haha #tmnt au competition #rottmnt #rottmnt replica #kid leo au #red rover au #uh... too many other au's sorry I'm in a rush to post this!#drawing on my lunch break #replica #kathaynesart #save rottmnt #rise of the teenage mutant ninja turtles #unpause rise of the tmnt #tmnt

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favoure · 5 months

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"do the opposite of what people tell you to do"

#desert duo #grian #goodtimeswithscar #secret life #mcyt #trafficblr #favourarts #ok to tag as ship #so i posted this to twitter first right #and the amount of people i have in my replies saying that they'll kill themselves is honestly Very funny #anyways im back :))#i missed drawing these two GOD #okay life update in the tags for this piece is: something about finals season just makes you want to draw more #<- has been saying this for 4 days straight now #YAAAAAAYYYY i got another desert duo sketch cooking fellas and this one is a Bit more self indulgent if yk what i mean hehe #<- SEE U IN THE SIDEBLOG

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ledzeppelinmixtape · 5 months

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posts that strike fear into your heart

#did i miss something???

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sleepysebris · 9 months

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that's one way to find out @halfahelix brought up imagine adrien with the peacock and I didn't get very far with the rest of that thought cause this was the first horror to enter my brain after

#it's supposed to be amok vision or something i hope it comes across that way #the feathers are NOT leaving the rings lmao #i realize now how wrong it could look #anyway adrien deserves to watch their performance!! :) he missed out!!!!#miraculous ladybug #my art #ml representation #ml representation spoilers #ml s5 spoilers #senti twins #sentimonster adrien #adrien agreste #felix fathom #kagami tsurugi #feligami #my ml comics

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ba1laur · 1 year

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