#of course gandalf won the bet | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

bonjour-rainycity · 3 years

Text

Late in the Night | Part Four

Previous part

Prompt: Friends have a bet how long it will take the ship to get together (Content Challenge Day 7)

Pairing: Legolas x Female Reader

Rating: PG-13

Word count: 1602

Warnings: None

Challenge participants: @game-ofthe-company @grunid @themerriweathermage @errruvande @the-reformed-ringwraith @awkwardkindatries

^^ Hey! If I haven't commented on your post(s) yet, it just means I haven't gotten the chance to read them. School has been ramping up, but as I have free moments, I'll be going back and looking at all your challenge posts <3

A/n: You guys...IT'S THE LAST PROMPT OF THE CONTENT CHALLENGE! What?! Thank you so much to everyone who participated and interacted with our posts. I had such a blast creating this past week and getting to know each and every one of you. I think it would be fun to do something like this again in the future, so let me know if you would like to be involved in planning/get updates!

As always, I encourage you to check out the accounts tagged above and our masterlists! You can find the challenge masterlist here and my personal masterlist here. Okay, enjoy :)

Aragorn waits, keeping an eye on the trees.

The minute his friends from the eastern inn arrive, they will leave town.

He had a pleasant night — private room, hot bath, well-prepared meals — but is ready to get back on their journey. For all he knows, the brief rest he allowed them could have already cost them vital time.

That thought causes him to pace.

“Calm yourself, dear friend, they will be along shortly,” Gandalf councils.

Aragorn tries to heed the wise wizard’s advice. Sure enough, he soon hears the light sounds of feet crushing grass and twigs, and knows they are close.

The four of them break into sight at roughly the same time, and Aragorn notices two things:

One, Legolas and Y/n refuse to look at each other.

Two, Gimli wears a grin bright enough to rival the sun.

Aragorn knows he must speak with the dwarf as soon as possible.

Something has happened.

Merry, who doesn’t get enough credit for his observation skills, notices the oddities too, and elbows Pippin in the side. Their eyes grow wide, and it takes everything in them not to shout guesses as to what this means.

It is a good while before Aragorn, Pippin, Merry, and Gimli have a chance to convene and discuss the new development. All four of them, though of course dedicated to the task at hand, desperately want a resolution to their ongoing bet.

It had started innocently enough.

Merry made an off-hand comment about how well Legolas and Y/n seem to get along. Gimli noticed the lass was a clumsier fighter when Legolas was watching. Aragorn realized his friend seemed nervous around the human woman. Pippin saw how each of them smiled brighter when the other was near.

Somehow or other, the four of them had put together their observations, and the rest is history.

The bet was born.

Each of them had put down fifteen coins and a deadline, losing the coins if Legolas and Y/n did not become a couple by the deadline, and winning coins if they did. Knowing his friend’s shy nature well, Aragorn had given the two the lengthiest allowance — six months. Pippin and Merry recognized the bold nature of humans, and guessed it would only take four months for Y/n to speak her mind and Legolas to reciprocate. Gimli, on the other hand, thought the two were already head-over-heels for each other and wouldn’t be able to keep quiet about it, and had given them only a month and a half.

Each participant, knowing his deadline was drawing nearer, had taken steps to push the two in the right direction.

The hobbit friends moved Legolas’ and Y/n’s bedrolls closer when they weren’t looking.

Aragorn put them on watch together. A lot. To the point where he actually felt bad about the bags under Y/n’s eyes.

But Gimli, perhaps, had been the boldest of them all, and proudly tells his friends so the moment they are alone much later that evening.

“Quickly, they are suspicious why it took four of us to gather firewood and herbs,” Aragorn mutters, darting a quick glance in the direction of camp.

“Yes, just get on with it,” Pippin squeaks, then throws a hand over his mouth, knowing he might alert Legolas with his volume.

“Alright, listen up lads.” Gimli grins and proudly tells his tale. “Boromir and I got to the inn first, as planned, and the innkeeper asked how many were in our party. I said two, and the innkeeper made a comment how it was good we didn’t have more folk waiting outside, as his inn was almost full. Well, that got me thinkin’, so I inquired how many more rooms were available. The innkeeper said two, not including the ones Boromir and I purchased. So I whipped out my velvet pouch and paid for another room, fibbin’ a bit and saying I might have a lady friend visiting and wasn’t sure if she would want to sleep in my room or not after our activities.” He wiggles his eyebrows in response to the stunned looks of his friend.

Aragorn shakes his head slowly, a bemused smile setting in his lips. “So you paid for an extra room just to force Legolas and Y/n into sharing?”

“Right you are,” Gimli grins, placing his fists on his hips. “It wasna even that expensive — I’ll make it back three times over, now that I’ve won this thing.”

“Ah, ah, ah, hold on,” Merry holds up a hand, halting Gimli’s gloat. “You can’t prove they did or said anything to start a courtship, so you haven’t won!”

“They won’t even look at each other and the elf’s as red as a strawberry, of course something happened,” Gimli practically shouts.

Aragorn, reliably a voice of reason, intervenes. “We shall have to inquire then, but be smart about it. We do not want to jeopardize their potential courtship with our game.”

The companions agree, then quickly turn to the forest, gathering firewood and herbs to supplement Sam’s soup and their cover story.

{***}

Back at camp, Legolas sits on a low tree branch, keeping watch over all his friends.

But mostly Y/n.

He cannot pull his eyes from her face. She sits on a rock, staring into the fire, absently cleaning the mud from her boots. Without permission, his mind goes back to the way he held her this morning, tucked against his chest, her leg wrapped around his. It was wildly improper, and he should be ashamed of himself.

But he doesn’t feel ashamed. Because the way they woke up this morning didn’t feel improper, it felt natural. With all his heart, Legolas wants to wake up like that every morning — his favorite person kept safely against his side. He wants to guard her and give her a wonderful life and bring her home and have his people adore her, too.

Legolas’ resolve hardens, because he knows he can no longer keep this to himself. Y/n has a right to know how he feels, because it affects her too.

He pushes himself from the branch, landing on the ground in silence. With four long strides, he stops beside her, reaching down a hand. “Will you talk with me?”

She looks up at him, nerves like she’s never felt before erupting within her. But she gathers her courage, forces what she hopes is a smile, and takes Legolas’ hand.

She wonders what he’ll say.

All day, she had been lost in embarrassment. Somehow in the night, she’d thrown her leg over his and practically attached herself to his chest — who does that?! And he’d said nothing when they woke up, only got up and went about his routine like normal.

So obviously, he doesn’t feel anything for her.

And that’s what this conversation has to be about.

Briefly, though, she allows herself to remember what it felt like to be in his embrace, and knows that she will cherish that feeling forever.

The warmth of his hand in hers helps her hold on to that memory and, to her surprise, when they reach a secluded spot, he does not let go. No, he takes her other hand in his, clutching both tightly.

Legolas nearly shakes with nerves, and he wonders if she can tell? Does she know how he feels like he might be sick? Oh, he has never felt anxiety like this before, and desperately wishes for it to be gone.

So he wastes no time in putting himself out of his misery.

“I want to be with you.”

Y/n blinks. Surely she can’t have heard him correctly? “What?”

Legolas sighs — her reaction gives him no indication how she feels either way. He bolsters his courage, and tries again. “I feel affection for each member of this Fellowship. But whereas I love the others as if they were my kin, I am unable to deny that how I love you is different. Elves live long lives and thus take matters of the heart very seriously. And, well,” he shrugs, all eloquence leaving him the moment he sees the shy, hopeful smile spread across her lips. “My heart is with you.”

Y/n can hardly believe her ears. She thought that he didn’t…that there was no chance of…but rather than dwell on all her miscalculations, or the myriad of dangers that haunt their future, she decides to just enjoy the moment. She throws her arms around Legolas’ neck, and he grips her tightly against him.

She turns her cheek to rest on his shoulder, unable to contain her grin. “You hold mine as well. I love you, Legolas.”

He pulls back only to rest his forehead against hers, head swimming from the joy of her acceptance and at being this close to her. “And I love you.” She lets out a giddy laugh and he closes his eyes, soaking in the sound. But then he focuses again, for there is something important he still must ask. “Will you accept my offer of courtship?”

Y/n can’t help herself from bumping her nose against his affectionately, and it feels so wonderful, so free to be with him this way. She has no desire for her future to continue without him, and so, her answer is found easily. “Of course.”

Relief settles in Legolas’ bones, the nerves finally leaving him and being replaced with happiness.

Just as their lips meet, the four friends break through the tree-line, back from collecting supplies.

Gimli’s triumphant shout can be heard for miles.

“Pay up, lads!”

A/n The end! This is the last chapter of this mini-series! Thanks for sticking with me as I had some fun with this one. I keep tag-lists, so at any time, just let me know if you would like to be tagged in anything. I’m in the planning stages of a Haldir x OC fic, and while I usually stay away from OC’s, I just cannot fathom typing “Y/n” for the length that I’m planning on making that story. So be on the lookout for that! Hope you all are taking care of yourselves and please know that my inbox is always open. Lots of love!

LITN tag list: @angelic-kisses13 @lainphotography @anangelwhodidntfall @sheriffgerard @themerriweathermage @k-llama-llama @hirokosoul @wellfuckmyexistence @ipsychosocial @anjhope1 @my-lotr-obsession-is-unhealthy

218 notes · View notes

aaalllice · 3 years

Text

you have changed ! pt.2 Thorin oakenshield x reader

(I am not English)

Warning : none

good reading

~~~~~~~~~~~~

short summary

The company was captured by goblins, but fortunately Gandalf arrived. I could see the potency of all the dwarves at the fight and that Dwalin had lost nothing in the power of his punches.

We came out unscathed, incroyable, right?

Even the hobbit that we thought for the most part lost and that Thorin despised even more, and he appeared more motivated than ever.

All seem to be getting better, until heard in the distance a ord of wargs.

We have all climbed in the trees that this found at the edge of the cliff.

All seemed lost, the King was on the ground and the flames circled us. But in an element of courage a few dwarves are hoisting on the branches and this sound throw on the wargs and orcs. Dori, Ori and I did not do it , the two brothers were in a very bad position, suspended in the void at Gandalf’s stick, as for me, I was badly landed on the branch, which almost knocked me out.

But it’s all over, the eagles have arrived, and Thorin has apologized to Bilbo.

~~~~~~~

5 months later

~~~~~~~~

I was between Fili and Kiri who bet on everything and anything, example : which of the two will manage to steal an axe from Dwalin, where which one runs the fastest or which one will give Balin the biggest headache.

I looked straight ahead, without saying anything or even meaning to participate in their nonsense, which is unusual, and the two brothers noticed it.

how you doing, orc head ? ; says kili

you can see she’s not well, idiot, tell us what’s wrong, goblin ; says Fili

I lift up my eyes to heaven, and give them a blow to the head.

it’s all right, morons, I’m just concentrating on the way ;

says rather about our uncle ; says Fili raising an eyebrow and with a smile full of malice

indeed at the head of the group was Thorin, I was at the end, but I could clearly see his back

what are you talking about ;

nothing, forget it ; says Fili by winking at me

i have a challenge for all three of us ; says Kili moving his arms hysterically

the first to steal one of Thorin's hair beads won ;

i bet you I can do it by noon tomorrow ; says Fili

and I bet you I’d steal two of them ; says Kili

they turned to me, with a wide smile and raised eyebrows

Pff, okay, I just bet you I’m the one who’s gonna win ;

The day went by without a problem, Fili and Kili did not stop circling around their uncle, who now suspects what. Bravo, it will be impossible to win

Besides, we don’t talk too much, since the Godelins, our only "conversations" is we eat, we go and you are still as stupid as when you were a child, but often it’s black look, and severe.

We eat ! ; say together Gloin and Oin

The night has fallen fast, the dwarves are all going to bed

If you have anything to do, do it now ; says Gandalf with a wink

he knew, I’m not even surprised, Well, like he says, I don’t have time to waste, where is Thorin, I didn’t see him go to bed.

we had placed our camp at the bottom of a small hill from where we could see the Lonely Mountain

He can only be here, it’s gonna be harder to robb him if he’s awake, but if I want to win...

I start to climb, I got to the top quickly, a magnificent view is offered to me, the stars shone so strong, we can see clearly . But no Thorin in sight

what do you want ; i jumped in amazement

it was of course Thorin, he was sitting on a tree trunk

The King under the mountain would let me sit by his side ? ;

And then you sulk when I tell you you’re still a cheeky child ;

he moves slightly so I can sit

the view is splendid, I had never seen the mountain before, I must say that I never follow go so far from home ;

what do you want ; we looked straight ahead of us

but you’ve never been this close in a long time ;

I don’t know why I said that (rule number 6 of Dis, we don’t talk about the mountain to Thorin unless he tells us first)

tell me what you want before I send you home ;

oh no, don’t do that, I didn’t even tell my parents where I was going ;

you didn’t warn them ? ;

eheheheh, it’s time to think about a plan to have this pearl !

actress mode engaged ~

yes, but it doesn’t matter anyway, they’re not anymore

what do you mean, they’re gone ? ; He turns his head

they're dead ; (which is obviously a lie)

but what do you want, I have to do whatever it takes to win

my head fell into my hands, if I could cry on demand it would have helped me

I do my best not to laugh, stress maybe or it’s because I can’t wait to mocked the brothers when I say I won

there was a long silence

I feel a hand on my back

I lift my head from surprise, I did not expect to have such physical contact with him

Thorin was close, our legs were touching, he always had his hand on my back. His blue gray eyes were looking at me carefully It was not a severe look as usual but a worried look.

I smiled softly at him

It’s all right, helping you get back to your place reminds me of something else ;

he turns his face towards the mountain, always his hand behind my back

soon, we will finally be home ;

I have an excess of confidence all of a sudden (and who tries nothing has nothing) so I put my head on his shoulder and close my eyes.

I couldn’t see his reaction, but he must have been surprised

his shoulder is so comfortable, I think I’m going to fall asleep soon

in fact, That’s what I did

I wake up slowly, I would have thought I saw the stars but the sun was already rising

I was lying on the trunk, with a green apple on the ground

I get up, fang in the apple try to remind me what happened after seeing my head paused on his shoulder

I paused my head on his shoulder!! but why did I do it? arghhh, I would have the right to reprimands, nice

bla bla bla grows a bit ; I made a blazer face

what have I done to have such an unconscious load ; I did his usual black look

by Durin spare me, his children will have my death ; I stood up and started to make a big gesture

I continued to imitate him, when I felt that there was something in my hand

good mooooorning guys ; I said in a conquering tone

y/n ; says Fili

where were you ? ; says Kili

guessed what I found ; said I raising an eyebrow

they looked at each other with an air of incomprehension on their face

what ??? ; said both, and loud enough for the dwarves close to us to turn around

Shhhhh ; I opened my hand to show them

it was a pearl, but not any pearl, a pearl of Thorin himself

how ? ; says Fili, disturbed

how did you do it? we tried all morning ; said Kili, angry at having lost

tell us ! ; said the brothers

Well, a magician never reveals his secrets ;

Gandalf started to laugh

what’s happening ? ; says Dwalin

why does Monsieur Gandalf laugh ; says Dori

'Cause of your face, you stupid idiot ! ; said Nori

a fight between some dwarf broke out, while the others mocked them

Fili and Kili were far away, too discouraged to have lost

I looked at the little pearl in my hand, I had won, I had earned the privilege of make fun of them at least until the end of the journey

but how? how the pearl landed here

I felt someone pass behind me and he took place next to me

you owe me your victory, so you owe me a favor now ;

then he went to the disordered group of dwarves, and howled in Khuzdul something I did not understand, but it immediately calmed everyone down, even me who had nothing to do with their fight.

once everyone is ready, we return to the path left last night

But contrary to yesterday, the brothers do only very small challenges (the first one that arrives at the big tree there, ....), for which I confess that I participated.

But the big difference between yesterday and today, is that now things between Thorin and me, will, how shall I put it, improve?

~~~~~~~~~~

End

pt.3 soon (i hope)

if you have somethings to say, tell me , text me

Kiss

#thorin #Thorin Oakenshield #thorin x reader #thorin fanfiction #Thorin son of Thrain #the hobbit #thorin x you #thorins company #fili and kili #Pt. 2 #you have changed !#thorin oakenshiel x reader

22 notes · View notes

lotrfics · 4 years

Text

IMAGINE: Boromir carrying Aragorn bridal style just to prove he can

Pairing: Boromir x Female Reader

Requested: Yes (This sounds hilarious and awesome!!! @lotrfics, so sorry for spamming you but i had to show you. Please, do something with this. I had an idea for a plot where the rest of the fellowship (with a reader who is part of the fellowship and has a crush on boromir) are having a random argument on who is the strongest,Boromir or Aragorn. Boromir lifts Aragorn to show them that he can, the reader is all impressed and gets accidentally super obvious on the crush because of her reaction. It’s an dea i got from this, the only fic i found for the idea on this image was posted in a deleted blog and when i clicked “ read more” to read it, it wasn’t there anymore.) @streets-in-paradise

Summary: Boromir carries Aragorn cause why not?

A/N: I thought this was going to be longer but I guess not, this is less than 1k words

Based on this imagine right here

Members of the Fellowship were having the most ridiculous argument to date.

They were arguing whether Aragorn or Boromir was the stronger one.

Everyone involved was so engaged in the argument it was surprising there were no orcs that were nearby and ambushed them.

You, Gimli, and Pippin agreed Boromir was stronger, but Legolas, Merry, and Sam believed Aragorn was stronger. Boromir found this amusing, while Aragorn shook his head, because, well, did it matter?

To the six arguing, yes, it did matter. There was a bet placed. Gimli and Legolas had a good amount of coins in their pockets. They didn’t know why, they didn’t need it at all, but it was helpful for bets like this.

“I’m sorry, but even when he is fully clothed, you could still tell he’s got muscles!” Gimli said, waving his hands everywhere. Legolas facepalmed. “Yes, but Aragorn is one of the Dunedain. Boromir only has some Numenor blood in him, but he is leaning into one of the Lesser Men.”

“That doesn’t convince us at all.” Pippin said, munching on his food.

“Looks can be deceiving, remember? Sam said to Pippin, “Boromir may indeed look stronger, but that does not always mean he is.”

“This argument is only getting ridiculous,” you said, “how about we let them show us? I don’t think words will end our debate.”

Merry turned to Boromir. “Come on, then. Show us what you can do. See who’s right and who’s wrong.”

Boromir chuckled and stood up. Carrying Aragorn seemed like a weird but fun idea, and he saw this as a chance to show off to you. If he was the stronger one, that is. He walked over to the ranger and scooped him up from his position with ease, carrying him bridal style.

Aragorn yelped at the sudden action. The hobbits let out a loud gasp, Gimli cheered, Legolas’ eyes widened, and Gandalf only smiled. You on the other hand, were very much impressed, you had a look of adoration on your face, and you did not know it but you began to blush. Pippin had caught on this when he turned to look at your reaction.

“Miss (Y/N) is blushing! I think she has a crush on Boromir!” Pippin said.

Everyone turned to look at you. “You wish you were Aragorn, don’t ya, lassie?” Gimli laughed, and everyone, including Aragorn himself and Gandalf, began laughing as well.

“I don’t blame you, (Y/N). Even from a man’s perspective, Boromir is handsome. There is nothing to be ashamed of.” Aragorn tried to comfort you, though still teasing you at the same time.

“Would you like to blow his Horn of Gondor?” Legolas said. You gasped at his comment while you heard some chuckles from the group.

Not going to lie, you actually enjoyed the teasing, it made you feel you had a chance with him.

“Everyone has had a crush on someone at some point in their lives,” said Sam, “yours happens to be Boromir at this very moment. It happens, Miss (Y/N). We understand how you feel.”

“Of course you would understand. It’s just like your crush on Rosie back in the Shire. Really sweet, but at times amusing.” Frodo nudged his best friend, and Merry and Pippin snickered. Sam didn’t seem to mind at all.

“Well,” said Boromir, who may or may not have absentmindedly dropped Aragorn, “I hope you do not mind me carrying you.”

Before you could respond, you were suddenly lifted from the ground by Boromir, carrying you bridal style. You wrapped your arms around his neck as if you were about to fall off from his hold, though the way he held you told you he would do anything to prevent you from getting hurt, whether you were being carried or not.

“Look at the way they’re holding each other,” Merry whispered to Pippin.

“It’s so cute. They look like they are in love.” Pippin nodded.

Boromir glanced at you and gave you a charming smile, the smile you grew to love seeing. “I like you too. I am grateful to have ever gotten the chance to get to know you and befriend you.”

You nuzzled your head against his neck, enjoying each other’s company, and you began closing your eyes (though you tried so hard to keep it open) as you were beginning to get a little sleepy. Today was a long day, after all.

Boromir sat down where he was earlier before everything had unfolded, because standing still for so long is not something he would like to do. He took a look at you and saw that you were already asleep.

The other members of the Fellowship glanced at each other and agreed it was best to start sleeping. It was silent, until Gimli spoke up.

“I almost forgot,” Gimli with a proud grin showed an open hand to Legolas, “we won the bet. Give me those coins of yours, eh?”

Legolas sighed then pulled out the amount of coins he and Gimli agreed on, and gave him what he needed.

Taglist: @aspiring-ginger @moony-artnstuff @kata1803

#lotr imagine #boromir x reader #boromir imagine #lord of the rings imagine #fav

163 notes · View notes

tgai-spock · 4 years

Text

Lines of ice from rolling waves and subtle villains

So we arrive on earth.

Chapter 2

Earth was chaos. Vulcan cities may have been overflowing with people who never learnt to mind their own business, where privacy was afforded only in relation to ones personal life and behind closed doors, but earth was chaos. Was anyone paying attention to anyone else? Both yes and no, several times loud rowdy men pointed at Spock and shouted:

“Oi! Vulcan,” why he had no idea. He’d never seen vulcans do this even by those who hated him for being a hybrid. Was it a statement of fact made by those who were mentally disabled, and was this gesture innocent, the same as a child pointing at a sky and saying, blue? Or was it something more violent? It was by the way, the sky, blue. Which was weird, there was little blue on vulcan, the seas were pink, the skies orange, although many of his clothes were blue, it was different seeing the colour where it naturally occurred. Other groups shouted at him too. Groups of girls huddled in groups would suddenly grow 3 times the size and point at him.

“Mother, at least on vulcan the vulcans pretend they aren’t talking about me. Send me back.” Spock said as they walked past another group. His mother, who was the only one he was shopping with looked more stressed than she had at his whining that the school was illogical, and that he was going to choose magic as a serious study course if he was forced to attend. That didn’t seem to bother his mother all that much, but it did make his father twitch in ways he hadn’t seen before, so he had put it down as one of his options along with science and computers. Of course his father wanted him to do computers, and math.

“Maybe we should get you a hat. You could wear my scarf for now” Amanda motioned as she went to untie her scarf.

“If I even begin to remotely look like a girl I’m going to kill myself” Spock said. Amanda sighed.

“Listen, don’t let their shouting bother you. In school that will completely disappear, it won’t be stood for at all. They have plenty of other aliens attend, they can’t have people just shouting out species randomly. I feel the people out today our rather dim, and drunk.”

Spock shrugged “fine. But only because I’ve been called worse and they’re validating the fact I’m vulcan.” Amanda sighed, she wished her son wouldn’t say things like this. He wished this wasn’t true for him.

“Can you read the email and remind me what we need to buy?” Amanda asked “I’ve forgotten.” Spock flicked up his lightweight tablet that he had been carrying in his hand non-stop for the past three days.

The Letter:

For first years attending the school each pupil must bring with them the following :

General Lessons:

Notebooks for each lesson, at least one new one per term.

General stationary, including pens, pencils, scissors, gluesticks, and celllotape.

Scientific Calculator

Protractor and compass

Shorts for p.e, unacceptable clothes include jorts. Shorts may be any colour but no patterns, pictures, characters, or 100 pictures of Nickolas Cages face may be on them.

Jogging bottoms/leggings (plain in colour, no patterns).

Suitable shirt or jumper for p.e (no slogans or patterns.)

Hairbands/bobbles

Tablet

If magic is a chosen subject they will need to bring:

Tarot cards

Tea Cup

Crystal ball

Spock hummed as he read through the items that were relevant to him, and they stopped outside a sports shop.

“Why does this say first years on it?” Spock asked.

“Oh, sometimes parents think their children will be better in a school that caters for children between the ages of 11-14 as they’re still very young. This is a school for older 15—17 year olds. Isn’t that good?”

“How?”

“You won’t be alone on your first day of school.” Amanda said.

“I guess” Spock said as he tried to work out if there were any benefits (currently Spock’s new slogan was ‘I guess’ but what it actually meant was ‘I have no idea how that makes sense’). They entered the sports shop.

The walked around aisles to the shorts and jogging bottom sections. Spock picked up plainest, blackest pair of each he could find.

“You can wear colour now.” Amanda encouraged.

“I don’t want to.”

“You could.”

“And yet I’m not going to.” Spock said and Amanda sighed, she could see this wasn’t going to be an argument she won. They walked past some hats and Amanda puts a black cap over his head, that was just large enough to go over his ears.

“Mother. I don’t need a hat.” Spock said.

“I don’t want you to hide who you are, but it would be nice for people to stop yelling at you. At least while we’re walking down the street.” Amanda says the words as though she is stabbing herself with each one.

“So a hat is going to solve this.”

“It might.. reduce the amount of shouts” Amanda reasoned “you don’t have to if you think thats worse.” Spock took off the black cap and picked up a sparkling silver hat, that was enough to make an elder vulcan faint on the spot. He put it on his head. Amanda grinned.

“You may have that hat.”

“Oh” Spock said, this hadn’t been what he wanted at all.

“Your father will hate it. And I’ll get you the black one too incase you suddenly find it too garish.” Amanda said.

“Okay but, I’m going to wear this non-stop as soon as I get back to vulcan. ” Spock said although he had absolutely no plans to do so, if the vulcan sun reflected of this hat there seemed to be a great possibility that it would kill someone else upon immediate impact.

“You can, I am allowing it.” Amanda said. Spock didn’t know how to react. His mothers logical boundaries must have disappeared into the atmosphere as soon as they arrived on earth.

The walked around to the sports bra section, and Amanda stopped suddenly. Spock almost bumped into her. Spock looked about awkwardly.

“Wrong section” he said.

“The thing about human school is you will be expected to do sports in front of other people.”

“And.”

“You can’t do that in a binder.”

“And yet I will.”

“No you won’t” Amanda said quietly but with such force it was enough to stop him in his tracks. She picks up a few.

“Do you want black or another colour.”

“Black.”

“Okay.”

“Now we need tarot cards, a tea-cup and a crystal ball.” Spock said looking down at his tablet despite having already memorised them.

“Do you want to try these on? Check they fit?” Amanda asked.

“No. Where are we going to get this stuff? Is this stuff even real?”

“Oh I looked up a little place around here” Amanda said and lead the way to the changing rooms.

“I said no” Spock said.

“I am saving you. You do not want to do p.e in clothes you’re not comfortable in, go try them on.”

“They’re the right size.”

“It’s completely different to finding out if their comfortable, go on.”

* * *

There was a lot of crystal balls in the shop display. Every inch his eyes looked on, sparkled with crystals. Crystals on necklaces, crystals on rings, crystals on pendulums - and a number of dragon ornaments.

“I should not have chosen magic” Spock sighs already defeated, Amanda laughs.

“Don’t think we don’t know you did that on purpose, your going through with it now” Amanda laughs pushing her son forward. They walk in through a dark blue door, and a bell above their heads rings as they enter.

“Good morning” a woman, with curly straw like hair behind a till greets them.

“Morning” Amanda replies “do you have any tarot cards?”

“I have a few selections available at the back” she points “would you like help choosing one?”

“No thank you” Amanda says and they walk in the direction the lady had pointed, around tables full of small gems with a ‘buy 4 get 1 free’ deal around them. The back of the store was different, slightly less gems appearing and more wooden rings. Much to Spock’s confusion, there were several wands and tall staffs with fancy curved wood tops.

“Why?” Spock asks pointing to a staff.

“Walking stick” says Amanda.

“Why?” Spock asks pointing to the wand.

“Religious practices. Your the one that choose magic, my aunt used to practice you know.”

“Is that the one married to the uncle who tried to kill me?” Spock asked.

Amanda sighed “well she’s divorced him now.”

“Erm” a voice from behind them, the shop keeper with wide eyes and a few extra packs of tarot cards in her arms said “I just remembered my shipment arrived this morning with some different tarot styles, so I thought I’d set them out for you.”

“Oh, thank you” Amanda said as the lady walked forwards and put down several extra packs. Amanda picked up one pack covered in cats, Spock picked up one that was black.

“You can take them out and have a look if you’d like, just remember to put them all back in.” The lady says and backs away, Amanda nods.

“This one” Spock says and chooses the cards that are all black except for the symbols outline on them, such as the 8 of swords which had 8 rainbow swords on it.

“Are you sure?” Amanda asks showing off the cats “I bet I could custom order one like this, but with sehlats instead.”

“I’m sure.” Spock said. Amanda shakes her head as they walk back over to the till.

“Well at least this has been quick. Excuse me do you have any crystal balls? The type you can see the future in.” Amanda asked

“Strange” the woman says “you’re the seventeenth person to ask me that.”

“There is a school nearby that has magic lessons, this is one of the requirements.” Amanda informs her.

“Oh” says the woman with her teeth as she looks up to her ceiling for a moment “yeah that would make sense. I thought everyone must just be like geeze, that Gandalf guys, pretty neat.”

Amanda nodded “I’m aware it’s a new school, is it new this year then, or is this a new shop?”

“Oh, I only brought the place a few months ago” the woman says as she places a large crystal on the bench “I guess I should check out the requirements that school has and get some in stock. Whats it called?”

“Saint Daimon’s" Amanda nodded.

“Nice, modern. Hey I’ll tell you what, if you buy this big crystal ball I’ll give you and your son a discount on any of these protection stones. Never hurts to have a little extra help” she says and she waves her hand over a collection of different sized gems, some smooth, some rough like rocks.

“Would you like a magical stone for protection?” Amanda asks Spock calmly. Spock picks up a hand size rough orange stone covered in blue lines. He chucks it up into the air and catches in neatly in his palm.

“Yes. This looks like a protection stone” Spock says and places it next to the tarot cards and crystal ball. Amanda eyes him suspiciously.

“I don’t like how you handled that at all.” Amanda says.

“You said I could have the protection stone.” Spock says with one raised eyebrow.

“Is that all I can help you with?” The woman asks.

“Yes thank you.”

“Card or print?”

“Print” Amanda says as the woman types up the cost into her till.

[Chapter 1] [Chapter 2] [Chapter 3] [Chapter 4]

[Chapter 5] [Chapter 6]

#spock #amanda grayson #star trek tos #star trek #trans!spock #trans spock #star trek aos #umm like almost cannon universe except the enterprise crew go to school together for a big lmao #linesoficefromrollingwavesandsubtlevillains2 #loifrwasv #ahh I'm going to regret the title at some point #the fact spocks trans probably won't appear for say another... 50 chapters. lmao i err.i've drafted some out buy I'm... I'm still not done #on the draft

2 notes · View notes

jq37 · 5 years

Note

so...... thoughts on the first ep?

**spoilers for start spreading the news**

What is UP you guys? The new season of Dimension 20 is out and your girl is back (implies I left, which is false) with only the hottest of takes.

Usually I vomit up my opinions with little rhyme or reason and, don't worry, I'm not changing that format any time soon. But, because of the structure of the episode, I think it'll be easier to use headings and go through each character/element of this. So let's do this y'all!

The Setting

I think the best thing you can do as a writer or a creative person in general is the make something that only you could make, you know? Like, make the thing that only someone with your specific life experiences and weird brain could have come up with. And I really think that this is that for Brennan. I already talked about this in other posts, but the version of NYC that Brennan created for this game is that to me. Like, magical NY has been done, but the specific details? Who else could have written, "The annual SantaCon is actually Santa dumping all of his defective clones into NYC where the magic barrier that keeps normals from seeing magic will disguise them and the protectors of the city will be able to deal with them"? That's so specific and so wild and so New York and so Brennan.

And I haven't lived in NY for so long but I've had one winter here and the way he describes what it's like to walk down the street during winter in the city is so real. Like smelling garbage then laundry detergent then sugared nuts from those corner stands and you're freezing and then baking in the subway in your coat. That was so so real. (I will be saying this phrase a lot so get used to it now)

And I like that he didn't make the obvious choices, you know? Like we've had three, like, magical figureheads across D20 and those are usually classic old, white, possibly British roles, you know? Like a Gandalf or a Dumbledore. But he had Aguefort in FH and now Esther and Alejandro in TUS. I just think it's cool that we're getting some different archetypes to fill these roles instead of the same dude c.p'd in again, you know?

Also, the fantasy NYC map is so dope. I wanna go back and try to read everything on it when I have the chance.

Pete

Ally is a DRUG DEALER. I thought Pete was gonna be a stripper but he's a DRUG DEALER. Honestly, I could have figured this out sooner if I'd just checked Urban Dictionary like I did just now and found out that "plug" means "someone who is a resource for obtaining something valuable that would otherwise be difficult to obtain" or, more simply, "drug dealer". But I'm glad I didn't because it was much more fun to find out in real time.

Ally makes some character choices sometimes that are too specific to not be rooted in life experience and that whole microwave cheese monologue was one of them.

Pete's official diagnosis is that he has "a lot going on."

Ally almost won MVP line of the episode with, "Shot my tits off." Murph losing it in the background killed me almost more than the actual line.

I really, really want Pete's doctor to be a recurring character because he is wild in how wild he isn't. He has so much wild stuff happening around him and he is in a wild line of work but he seems like a relatively stable guy. I love him. Also, the completely wrong cadence he used to say, "lgbt ally" was gold.

Is Ally ever gonna have a character with a good relationship with their parents? One time? Ever?

I literally don't even know how to begin to address the wild magic trip Pete went on. Like, I don't think Ally knew what they were doing when they decided to be a wild magic sorcerer. I don't think they knew what kind of challenge they were issuing to Brennan. And after seeing the wild nonsense Brennan consistently came up with for Jer'ih'meh in Bloodkeep, I can't want to see the insanity he spits out for Pete.

"You're the one who they they wanted to play a wild magic sorcerer."

Also, Brennan just using lyrics from "New York, New York" for whatever dream demon or whatever was going on in that trip was, like, equal parts clever and hilarious. Sidenote, do you think all the ep titles are gonna be from songs about NY? I mean, there are enough songs I bet.

Pete has this thing where he constantly lands on the exact wrong part of the situation to focus on. Like later when he gets stuffed in the magic closet at the hospital and he's like, "Hospitals are so advanced, also go much is this gonna cost?" Ally's comic timing on that is always perfect.

WILD that that was the first intro. Like, way to kick off the new season with a bang. I really wonder what this episode would have felt like if this was the last intro or if the intro for the two normal people hadn’t been right at the top. Actually now that I’m editing, I feel like we almost got the intros from least experienced w/ this stuff to most experienced. Because Pete is a total noob. Sophia is also a noob but she has met Kugrash at least once. Then you have Ricky who’s only been in this for about a year. Then Kingston who probably has more experience than Kug by years but Kug has been a rat man his whole life (presumably). Finally Misty who is probably like a BS amount of years old and steeped in this stuff. Honestly, if I was DM’ing, I might have fudged the die rolls to look exactly like how it turned out.

Sophia

Emily describing her character and slipping into her character voice gradually as she went on was so pro.

"Like if Fran Dresher went on an Amy Winehouse bender." I love her.

"Did you not want baby bangs?"

"She's a WHOO-OAR."

I'm gonna die if Brennan make than woman an actual succubus because of an offhanded comment.

My favorite thing is when Emily is saying some nonsense and she can barely even get through it without breaking. Also, Murph is so visibly amused by Emily's entire intro. It's great.

I love that both of the "normal" characters spent most of this episode intoxicated in one way or another.

So Emily absolutely won the episode in my eyes for coming up with one of the sickest burns I've heard and in real time. A dude tells her to read his dick and she, after only a momentary pause, says, "No I'm not gonna read your dick (beat) because I don't read short stories!" Brennan doesn't even make her roll. He just narrates her success. The table goes wild. The bar she's at goes wild. Zac specifically is cracking up. Like, I feel like this is gonna be a little bit of a deep cut reference but did any of you ever play the Monkey Island games and do the insult swordfighting? That's what that scene was. Amazing.

Murph's, like, entire posture and expression (@ 1:24ish) when Emily is saying Sophia thinks she saw a giant rat man who gave her an egg sandwich and Gatorade is total gold.

"Gotta kill some brain cells to kill the ones with the memory of Dale in them."

OK so funny story (funny to me at least) at the Fantasy High live show, I was talking to some other girls who were there and we ended up talking about how the small of a woman's back is basically the worst place you can casually touch them outside of the really bad places and how viscerally terrible it is so when Brennan said one of the trolls touched one of the girls there and Sophie/Emily was like BIG NOPE, I had a That's So Raven flashback to that conversation immediately.

Emily leaps into action...and rolls a nat 1 to fight a bunch of trolls. She actually does really well in the rest of the fight though so that's good.

Oh, also Siobhan made everyone dope themed dice boxes!

Ricky

I hope Dimension 20 runs for the next 10 years and I hope Zac plays a good, big, doofus in every single season.

"He's basically like Superman if Superman were Japanese." Love.

Also, I love the distinction that he's 5' 8" but buff.

Ricky surrounded by a raging fire: First of all, that's a cool bear.

I like the way that Brennan skinned the cleric and paladin powers for this game so they're more about values than deities. I was wondering how it was gonna work in this setting and I think this was such a cool way to handle it.

I really think Brennan has a great handle of presenting certain things in such a way that it's interesting for the players as well as the audience. Like, when Ricky is trying to escape the burning apartment, he puts an obstacle in his way that forces him to use his Paladin powers (to create water specifically). It's not really a hard "puzzle" or something he has to roll for, but it introduces to the audiences that he's not just a firefighter. I just think it's really cool that he's able to pull off narrative things like that without actually controlling the characters. (And, props to the players too, of course, for being so consistently entertaining).

"Mr. March."

Ricky in the middle of the winter: I'm not as tan as I used to be.

Ricky rooftop runs like a freaking superhero.

OK, this is barely related to what I'm talking about right now but it's important to me that you all know this. I commented in an earlier post that Ricky clearly had circus music playing in his head at all times and then I was like, "Hmm, I wonder what that one circus song is called." You know, the song that you think about immediately when you hear the phrase "circus music" so I looked it up and APPARENTLY it is a CZECH MILITARY MARCH known alternately as (brace yourselves) ENTRY OF THE GLADIATORS and THUNDER AND BLAZES. I kid you not. That's actually what that song is called. I called my brother and told him immediately. OK, back on topic.

Is a questing blade a thing? I feel like it's a Thing from legend or fairy tales or something but, when I Google it, I come up with basically nothing.

Does Ricky have a thing for Esther or is he just a super awkward texter and nice guy who does not want to be set up by his sister for a different reason?

I need Brennan to explain how the Santa Question works in this world. The question being, "Why don't parents freak about the gifts they're not buying?" and, side question, "Why don't poor kids get presents?" My go-to answers are always, "He Jedi Mind Tricks into thinking they bought them," and, "He has to work within each family's socio-economic means in order to not be obvious." So there are def plausible answers. But, like, this is something I like to see addressed when we're doing the "Santa is real," thing.

"I grew up with twins and one of them was worse than the others so that makes sense."

"Is Santa good?"/"The ethics of it are alarming, I won't lie."

So, my paranoid thought for this episode is I'm a little Concerned that someone down the line (maybe Esther, but hopefully not) is going to take advantage of Ricky's Big Dumb energy and his "It's the right thing to do," mentality and manipulate him into doing something Not Great. Like, it's not based on anything besides mainlining a ton of media over the past 24 years but I'm just gonna keep an eye out.

Re the Santa/Peppermint Zombification: Hey Brennan, turn your location on. I just wanna talk.

I have to say, from the bottom of my heart, what the hell?

That creeped me out in the same way that episode of Adventure time where Princess Bubblegum (infused with the primal elemental candy energy or whatever) turned everyone into Candy people and everyone started singing Let Me Call You Sweetheart. What a weirdly specific body horror thing for me to encounter more than once. That one peppermint tooth thing is gonna haunt me.

Kingston

I gotta say, props to Lou for pulling a complete 180 on the kind of character he picked this time around. He went from playing this super extra rich pretty boy to this salt of the Earth quasi patriarch and he's just as comfortable with it. Kingston is so real. I went to church with like 50 guys like him back home.

Why are you fighting so hard about free food Kingston? Take the free homecooked food Kingston!

The intensity of his, "I will be here until I die," was hysterical.

Mentioned this before but I love the flavoring of the cleric class where instead of being attuned to a deity Kingston is basically attuned to the entire city. Also, the perks are excellent. Bus service anywhere for free. Sign me up.

I like that Ricky's sister works at the hospital. It's a really cool potential connection for later.

"We're gonna take the thing outchyo butt. We're not gonna deny you medical services."

"Aint nothing wrong with being a freak." --Kingston Brown

Fantasy creatures having to deal with updated tech (like the Toll bridge trolls talking about EZ-passes) is one of my fave urban fantasy tropes.

"I've got a really sweet smelling man here!"

"Yeah, my tooth fell out and now it's a candy. Hey, how much is this gonna cost?" This is what I’m talking about. Priorities my dude.

I love that Kingston knows Pete's weird mob doctor. It seems like part of his deal is that he just knows everything about everyone in the city (within whatever parameters).

Pete says, in quick succession about Ricky, "I feel like he would bully me," and, "He seems like a golden retriever," which I feel are almost mutually exclusive statements.

Kugrash

Well, I asked what kind of druid nonsense was happening in Central Park and the answer is Murph apparently.

I really wish I could have been there when Murph announced he wanted to play a literal rat.

"I am the shit that feeds the flies. A dumpster druid."

"Wherever you are rat Jesus, I love you." You're killing me Brennan.

Aww Kugrash goes around feeding the homeless and stuff. He's like this grumpy ass rat man who really cares about the community.

"Santa you fucking bum." --Kugrash

"I'm sorry are you a rat?"

The idea of a roach with a hobo sack pisses me off because it's adorable but roaches are the worst.

"Is Santa dead?"/"I don't know. I'm not religious."

"Santa Claus is real and he's DEAD."

Brennan loves to use the modifiers "full" and "fully" and I have picked it up irl and in my writing.

"Let's get a little fucked up and go see if Santa's dead!"

Just that whole squirrel interaction.

The sixth borough huh? Interesting. I see you Brennan.

Also, the detail that Kug's clothes are made from old MTA vests is great.

Misty

Siobahn is playing basically exactly the character I thought she'd be playing but she's doing it so much better and more extra than I could have imagined.

"A lady would never say her age, so I won't."

Is her pianist magic or something too? I have my suspicions.

So Misty gets some kind of bard and/or fairy high from praise and adoration which is interesting.

What kind of weird, morally dubious and/or unpleasant fae thing is Misty gonna have to do soonish? It's not gonna be good. Fae stuff never is.

DON CONFETTI

"I don't study magic. I just *am* magic."

So many of these intro vignettes end with, "You don't know that...but you do know who does." Like I said before, I really love the weaving together of all the story threads to get everyone in the same place at the same time in an organic feeling way.

Also he makes all these transitions sound cinematic, like he's writing the description parts of a movie script and not narrating in person.

Public Library! I knew we'd end up here eventually but I didn't know it'd be pretty much immediately. Like, if you're going w/ the "NY is magic" premise, the library has to figure in, you know?

Emily immediately having Sophia recognize Ricky as Mr. March was such a funny and on point character decision. I love how one-off, spur of the moment lines end up being running jokes because other players pick on them and drop them an hour later.

"Are you a rat?"/"Yeah, I'm a rat man!"/"I'm sorry if that was rude."

Brennan: The lions are alive and they're boyfriends.

Misty and Siobhan both are genre savvy enough to want to nip a knights/knave door puzzle situation in the bud.

Ricky on escape rooms: I'm not very good at them but I can definitely try my hardest. (Guys, I love him so much.)

Love me some MC Escher steps.

Underrated Misty line: It's all infernal to me.

Misty's little, "Ugh" at learning they have to go to Times Square is the real NY experience.

Is this Alejandro dude gonna die? What's the over under on this dude eating it very soon?

Misty encouraging Pete to shoot Alejandro is so needlessly chaotic which is a common fae trait and I really hope this escalates.

I dunno what Murph rolled for initiative but he looks like he just shamed his entire family line.

And we’re fighting an army of crazed Santa clones next week! We have literally just started and we are already fully off the rails. I cannot *wait* to see where we go from here if this is the *starting point*.

#dimension 20 #the unsleeping city #asks #anon #Anonymous

127 notes · View notes

ridiculoussquid · 5 years

Text

A Cracking Celebration

Characters: Gandalf, Thorin, Nori, Bilbo, Gollum, Thorin’s company

Pairings: slight Fíli/Ori

Words: 1285 Rating: G Summary: Gandalf thought Yuletide crackers would be a good idea: small trinkets like brass clasps, cups, rings... what could possibly go wrong? Notes: Written for Day 13 of Arda Advent on @ardaprompts

The Khuzdûl is translated in the mouseover text.

Warnings: Crack. Slight mention of overeating.

Prompt: 13 - Christmas cracker

Also posted on AO3: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16965708

“Did you put the surprise you made into the basket by the door?” Gandalf asked as Bofur sat down at the festively decorated table.

“Yes, I did,” Bofur replied as everyone who was already sitting rolled their eyes.

“Oh wait,” Kíli exclaimed and began rummaging through his pockets. “I think I forgot to put mine in after all. Oh, here it is!”

He hurried to put it in the basket.

“Nori, stay away from that basket!” Gandalf warned. “I know who I’ll make responsible for any missing surprises.”

“I’m just taking a little look, no harm in that,” Nori said.

“There are just trinkets in there anyway,” Glóin pointed out. “I don’t really know what the point of this is anyway.”

“It supposed to be fun,” Bilbo said. “And Gandalf does know how to make things entertaining.”

“As long as it doesn’t involve elves,” Thorin said darkly.

“Why does he get to mess with them and we don’t?” Nori grumbled, looking up from the pile of food stacked onto his plate.

“Well, Mister Gandalf is a wizard and knows what he’s doing,” Dori pointed out. “While you have a tendency of getting into trouble.”

“I’d bet my left thumb that Gandalf has gotten into more trouble than I ever will.”

“Can’t we just enjoy the feast in peace?” Ori asked.

“So what you’ll want to do… Kíli are you listening?” Gandalf asked, raising a bushy eyebrow.

“…is pull on the ends,” Glóin finished for him. “Let’s do it, Dwalin.”

“No, wait!”

There was a loud explosion and small pieces of colourful paper rained down over the stunned dwarves.

“Thanb ra ulkhudlukhdu!” Bifur exclaimed.

Kíli picked himself off the ground and Óin stuffed a cloth into his ear trumpet. Glóin wiped little bits of paper from his beard and Dwalin shook them off his head.

“Why didn’t you tell us it would explode?!” Glóin demanded.

“That is exactly what I was trying to tell you before you just barged on,” Gandalf said.

“I didn’t put any explosives in there,” Nori said quickly.

“No, you didn’t,” Gandalf agreed. “I did. There’s no use in Yuletide crackers if they don’t crack, is there?”

“This isn’t in any way dangerous, is it?” Dori asked, seemingly having lost his trust in Gandalf.

“Dangerous? Oh, no, not if you keep your wits about you,” Gandalf said. “Whoever of the two pulling the cracker is quicker gets to keep the trinket, by the way.”

Glóin quickly slapped his hand on the brass clasp that had fallen out of the cracker.

“The other gets the hat and the trinket in the second cracker that is pulled by the two,” Gandalf continued. “I want everyone to be wearing a hat and to have a trinket by the end of the evening.”

Dwalin reluctantly put the lopsided crown onto his head.

Gandalf grinned. “So, who wants to go next?”

“I do!” Fíli said. “Ori, will you take the other side?”

“Of course,” Ori said, even though Dori frowned, not entirely convinced this was harmless.

They braced themselves and pulled. There was another small explosion and a small cup fell out. Fíli made a grab for it but missed spectacularly while Ori got a hold of it.

Bofur groaned as Ori carefully set the paper hat on Fíli’s head. “It couldn’t be any more obvious that Fíli let Ori win.”

Kíli nodded. “When do you think they’ll announce their engagement?”

“Hey, I won fair and square!” Ori protested, red as a beet.

“He did.” Fíli glared at them. “And I refuse to have such rumours spread about us!”

“Enough, all of you!” Thorin said. “This is not to be an evening of arguing.”

“I’ll go next,” Balin said quickly. “Bombur?”

Bombur nodded and they pulled the next cracker. Balin won a small drum and Bombur looked a little disappointed.

“I’ll trade if you get something nice later on,” Balin said and Bombur nodded happily, adjusting his new crown.

“I challenge you over this one,” Nori said, nodding at Thorin. “Are you up to it?”

“Of course,” Thorin said, loosening his shoulders.

There was an explosion and flash of something golden flying through the air. Thorin and Nori grabbed for it at the same moment.

“MINE!” Thorin roared.

“No, it’s mine!”

They scuffled for the small golden object, neither willing to admit defeat.

“It’s just a game,” Gandalf reminded.

“Let go!” Nori shouted.

“It’s mine!” The veins on Thorin’s neck were bulging.

“No it’s not! I got hold of the ring first!”

“It’s MY precious piece of jewellery!”

Gandalf paled and rounded on Bilbo. “Bilbo Baggins, did you put that ring in there?!”

“Yes?”

The room darkened. Ominous music started playing. Gandalf rounded on Nori and Thorin. “Both of you! Drop that ring at once!”

“But it’s mine!”

“It’s my present!”

“Where is that music coming from?” Kíli asked, glancing around.

“Why is it so dark?” Fíli added.

“I said DROP that ring!”

“My precious! My precious! Where’s my precious? Give it to us!” Gollum came rushing into the room.

“What’s that?” Fíli asked, protectively stepping in front of Ori.

“It doesn’t look very clean,” Dori stated. “I don’t think it should be in the same room as food.”

Thorin and Nori didn’t even look up.

“What’s he doing here?!” Bilbo asked, half hiding behind Bofur. “He’s supposed to be in the Misty Mountains.”

“It stole my preciousss!” Gollum hissed at him. “Give it back to us!”

“It’s mine!” Nori growled.

“Is not! I got it first,” Thorin protested.

“My precioussss!” Gollum exclaimed, joining the fray. “It is MINE!”

An elbow from Thorin sent him flying.

“Whatever were you thinking?!” Gandalf asked Bilbo.

“But you said we should put small trinkets in there!”

“Yes, trinkets! Not real jewellery, and especially not jewellery like that!”

“But I just put a small paper ring in there, painted with golden paint!”

“You... that’s not the ring you found in the mountains?”

“Of course not!” Bilbo said, clutching his pocket.

“That really is just a paper ring?”

“Yes, that’s what I’ve been telling you all this time!”

The ominous music stopped playing. The darkness lifted from the room.

“Who turned on the light?” Thorin asked, looking around.

Nori snatched the twisted, dented paper ring. Gollum fled from the room. The dwarves looked around in confusion. Kíli carefully set the paper crown onto Thorin’s head.

“Should we go after him?” Dwalin asked.

Gandalf shook his head. “He’ll be long gone by now.”

“What happened just now?” Bofur asked carefully.

“That’s what I’d like to know,” Gandalf said. “Why did you two feel the need to get into such a fight over a paper ring?”

“It’s shiny?” Nori supplied. “I can’t resist anything shiny.”

Dori sighed. Everyone looked expectantly at Thorin.

“I... may have a hard time giving in?”

Gandalf sighed. “Curse the stubbornness of dwarves. Why did I ever think this was a good idea?”

“What happens with the remaining crackers?” Bilbo asked.

Gandalf contemplated the question for a moment. “Thorin, I will pull another cracker with you. You will get to keep the trinket, so do not try to kill me over it. I promise, you will regret it if you do. Is that clear?”

Thorin nodded. Everyone jumped at the explosion from the cracker and Gandalf hurried to get away from the trinket that fell out.

“Now, does anybody else have something they should tell me? Any bad habits or addictions that might get in the way of peacefully pulling some Yuletide crackers?”

Kíli cleared his throat. “Um, whenever I start eating nuts, I can’t stop eating until I start feeling sick.”

Gandalf sighed. “I doubt that will be a problem now. Now can we please get this over with?”

#the hobbit #fanfiction #crack #thorin's company #gandalf #my fanfiction #ardaadvent

4 notes · View notes

reach4thesky · 6 years

Text

The Parting Glass

Finally have some time to write! I had this floating around in my head for a few days and I’m so happy to get it out now. I had come up with it after listening to Celtic Woman’s version of The Parting Glass, which had given me goosebumps. I’ve listened a lot of versions of this song but holy crap that was amazing. So I used their version as inspiration for this. I hope that you enjoy it! Summary: Atypical girl from Earth drops into Middle Earth trope. In which she falls beside her princes, Thorin is King and Bofur sings a dirge for the daughter of his heart at the 10 year anniversary of the Battle of Five Armies.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Ten years. It have been ten years since the reclaiming of Erebor and the Battle of the Five Armies. Thorin King sat on the dias of a large public hall within Erebor, Bilbo to his left and Dis to his right, observing the feasting crowd of dwarves of Erebor and the Iron Hills, men from Dale that accompanied the also newly crowned Bard Dragonslayer, and a few elves representing King Thranduil. Even Gandalf and Beorn had been convinced to attend, seating with the other big folks towards the back of the hall. The crown felt heavy on his brow as he struggled not to look at the three smaller crowns that lay on empty plates on a smaller table before him.

The feasting after a long day of ceremony and speeches had barely begun when Bofur approached his King and bowed, the crowd behind him slowly becoming quieting as they watched curiously.

“Yer Majesty.” Bofur bowed, his ever present hat in his hands.

“Bofur Steelheart.” Thorin nodded in return, his heart pounding in his chest.

“I was hoping that ye were still agreeable to the...” Bofur’s gaze moved to the empty plates as his voice trailed off.

Thorin swallowed with difficulty, ignoring the hard stare from his sister. He nodded and stood as Bofur turned around, placing his hat back on his head. Upon raising his hands, the last of the whispers fell away and all eyes were on the dias. “Bofur Steelheart wishes to remember those who are no longer with us.”

Thorin returned to his seat, his hands clenched around the end of his armrests.

Bofur took a deep breath. “It has been a very busy ten years, has it not?”

A roar from the crowd answered him, mugs raised. He grinned and waited for the sound to die down. “When we left the Shire on the quest to take back Erebor from a dragon of all things, we numbered 14. By the time we made it through the mountains, we picked up another member of our company. She had been captured by the Goblin King and hailed from a land so far away that many of us have never heard of it nor will ever visit it. She had no cause or reason to join us, but join us she did.”

The miner turned lord paused, looking to the crowns once more. “Her laughter and spirit was a balm even in the darkest of moments. It was quite surprising how quickly we all came to love her, as a daughter, as a neice, and of course the Princes found their One in her as well as each other.”

Bofur’s voice continued to boome throughout the room, bouncing off the acoustics to be heard in every corner. “One of the many things that we talked about, the differences between our peoples, was how her people courted and marriage traditions. We all had bets on how long it would take before she got fed up with the Princes and took matters into her own hands.” He paused when the crowd laughed. “Bilbo and Ori won the bet of course, turned out they were encouraging her without anyone knowing!”

Bofur turned and grinned at the blushing hobbit behind him, the laughter louder the second time. “Among some of her people, there is a jest that men who are about to be married are walking to their deaths, the death of the freedom, the death of their bachelordom. As part of this jest that she witnessed a group of friends lamenting a bridgegroom with a dirge. And yet he was the happiest, and they for him, when he wed his love.”

Bofur walked to the edge of the dias and motioned for Nori to hand him his mug of ale. “I had adopted her into Clan Ur and in the tradition of her people, I was to escort her down the aisle when their betrothal was announced with the blessing of our King. I’m no bard but I had intended another song to sing for her on her wedding day. On this day, I believe the song she taught us is fitting. Not only for her as the Princess of our hearts, or our Princes but for all the dwarves, men, and elves that fell in the Battle of the Five Armies.”

“Of all the money that e'er I had I spent it in good company And all the harm I've ever done Alas it was to none but me And all I've done for want of wit To mem'ry now I can't recall So fill to me the parting glass Good night and joy be to you all So fill to me the parting glass And drink a health whate’er befalls And gently rise and softly call Good night and joy be to you all Of all the comrades that e'er I had They're sorry for my going away And all the sweethearts that e'er I had They'd wish me one more day to stay But since it fell unto my lot That I should rise and you should not…” Bofur paused, choking on his words. His dashed away the tears streaming down his face and opened his mouth only to find that no more words would come. After a moment of struggle, the sound of a viol and another voice continued on.

“I gently rise and softly call, Good night and joy be to you all” Ori, brave little Ori now the youngest of the company, stepped onto the dias with his own mug of ale. He joined Bofur next to the crowns, Dwalin following with his viol. “Fill to me the parting glassAnd drink a health whate’er befallsAnd gently rise and softly callGood night and joy be to you all”

As Dwalin played the melody of the song, joined by Nori with a tamborine, the rest of the company joined them on the dias. Bilbo stood up, his lighter voice joining with the deep rumbles of his dwarves, Bofur finally having found his voice again. Thorin could barely feel the hand Bilbo rested on his arm, unable to remove his gaze from the crowns.

“But since it fell unto my lotThat I should rise and you should notI gently rise and softly callGood night and joy be to you all”

Crowns that he had forged with his own hands for the 1 year annivarsary. Crowns that he would never place on the brows of his nephews, the sons of his heart. Crowns that they would never wear when they were presented as formal heirs to his kingdom. Crowns they would never wear to their wedding. The Crown that he would never place on her head and declare her princess of the realm. He would never see the children they would have had, the future of his line cut short. A small sound of grief from his right quickly reminded him that he was not the only one. Guilt swirled through him as he thought of his sister, her grief when she had arrived to find that her sons had fallen in battle. She had returned to the Blue Mountains soon after and it had taken many letters to convince her to come for this day. Swallowing back his own grief, he stood next to Bilbo and lent his voice to the final verse.

“So fill to me the parting glassAnd drink a health whate’er befallsAnd gently rise and softly callGood night and joy be to you allGood night and joy be to you all.”As the last notes faded away, the company tipped back their mugs until they were emptied. One by one, they laid each mug at the foot of the table and stepped down to return to their seats.

Thorin waited until Bilbo had returned to his seat before speaking. “May we always carry the memories of the ones we lost, these ten years past. Our grief is shared, each one of us in these halls. Knowing them as we do, our friends and kin would not want us our sadness to ruin the joyful events yet to come.” He raised his newly filled mug of ale. “To the dwarves of Erebor and the Iron Hills!” A roar answered him and had to raise his voice as he gestured to the men. “To the men of Laketown and of Dale!” A cheer rose up from the smaller group in the back to join the dwarves. His hesitance was not noticable to anyone but Bilbo and his sister as he gestured to the smallest group. “To the elves of the Greenwood!” The quieter response from the elves was almost lost amoung the pounding and stomping from the rest.

Thorin nodded, sipped his ale as a toast and sat down, his gaze returning once again to the crowns.

#the hobbit #The hobbit AU #filixkilixoc #durincest #bofur #thorin

12 notes · View notes

tessatechaitea · 5 years

Text

Batman Loves Superman #1

Batman teams up with a Superman pencil topper?

When did Perry White become interested in Batman and Gotham stories? Oh, that's right. When Joshua Williamson began writing him. Oh, and what editor puts a fucking exclamation point in their headline? Even "Dewey Beats Truman" didn't have any punctuation!

If Jimmy Oleson can get a picture of Batman from that angle, then somebody needs to begin investigating Jimmy Oleson. He might be Superman. It's going to take me all night to read this one comic book if I keep getting bogged down in the details. Although the details are where all the fun is! The plot probably won't even be worth mentioning. I can probably state it right now without even reading the comic book! "The Batman Who Laughs introduces some kind of virus into the DC Universe which begins infecting heroes whom Batman and Superman need to sniff out and inject with Bat-Antidote." That's pretty much what the cover said and I don't expect it to get any more complicated. While Clark is at work surrounded by his fellow employees (and employer!), Batman calls for Superman's help. Instead of excusing himself from the room, he simply disappears at super speed. I mean, he's fast so nobody will notice that he left without anybody noticing him leaving! Plus, Clark Kent's persona is so boring that I guess everybody just shrugs and thinks, "Was he even here? Who knows? *YAWN*".

The second page and Williamson is already losing me by having Superman engage in trite comic book philosophy. Think up better reasons for Superman to be better, you lazy jerk.

"You know why I don't punch people on the street? Because then I'd be like people who punch people on the street!" is a pretty lazy code of ethics. Even "I don't punch people on the street because I don't want to be punched on the street" would be better and even that's pretty much the bare minimum of being a good person. How about Superman doesn't treat bad guys like they treat people because he follows the teachings of Jesus, especially the bit about how the man with no sin should cast the first stone. And, no, that doesn't mean righteous people get to act like assholes, Tumblr. It means everybody should have a chance to redeem themselves and their past horrible behavior. It's an anti-death penalty statement made at a public execution. And it's not because Jesus doesn't want people to become like the convicted! It's because he understands that everybody throwing rocks has, at some point, done something for which they've needed forgiveness. And the only way to get forgiveness is to earn it through works and actions. And you can't do that if a bunch of self-righteous assholes on Twitter murder you with stones. Fucking, Jesus, man. It's weird that I totally get what you're saying but I don't believe in you at all and there are millions of people who don't fucking understand you one bit but claim you as their Lord and Savior. If you're not religious, just replace "Jesus" with "Gandalf" in the prior exchange and remember that Gandalf's lecture to Frodo about how we can't give life so why do we feel so quick to take life away is the reason Gollum survives to destroy the One Ring. Mercy and compassion and forgiveness are the only ways to allow for redemption. Oh, sure, Gollum never really redeems himself and the One Ring is only destroyed because Gollum is a greedy and clumsy asshole! But I think you're supposed to kind of ignore that part and just realize without him, Frodo would have become just as greedy but way less clumsy and Sauron would have won. Anyway, that was Earth-Negative-Whatever's Superman thinking that trite bullshit so maybe I can let it go! I'm sure the Superman of Earth-Positive-0 has way more complex thoughts about moral superiority! Earth-Positive-0 Superman has been called to Gotham by Batman to discuss The Batman Who Laughs and his special serum. I didn't read The Batman Who Laughs but I assume Batman defeated The Batman Who Laughs in it. But it was close and Batman was forced to consider what could happen to the world if he ever stepped over that line! You know the line! Superman just said it in my previous scan! The line that Batman uses to prove that Batman doesn't believe in justice at all; he's just trying to keep from becoming a serial killer one day at a time.

Ugh. I forgot that in Batman Loves Superman comic books, we're subjected to this kind of constant Narrationg Boxing. And the more mediocre the writer, the more intolerable the "playful" thought exchanges.

Commissioner Gordon sends Batman and Superman on a mission to save some kid that was apparently kidnapped by a Superman Who Laughs. After Batman and Superman leave, Gordon laughs. Not much but it's a slight laugh. So I guess I'm supposed to suspect anybody who laughs is evil now? I guess I'll have to kill myself to save all of my loved ones from my gregarious personality! I'm a monster!

This is a trick question, right? More to the point, "What could Superman do that wouldn't stop Batman?!" I can think of about five thousand ways that Superman could stop Batman without even having thought about it before! They just all came to me as soon as Batman asked the question!

I get it. Readers of DC have been trained to believe that nobody can stop Batman. Batman always has a plan. Batman is always prepared. Batman will, if he has to, kill Superman to save the world. Except we also know that Batman won't kill or else that will make him no better than the bad guys! And if we assume that in the final battle between Batman and Superman that Batman will finally kill, maybe we should assume Superman will as well. And maybe we should assume that Superman isn't as naive as Batman thinks he is and that Superman will be killed by Batman in a surprise attack (like how the Batman Who Laughs kills his world's Superman in the beginning of this issue). Maybe Superman will just fly into space and incinerate Batman with his laser vision from orbit. Or maybe Superman will suck all of the oxygen out of a ten mile radius around Batman, knocking him (and everything else) unconscious after which Superman will eat his heart. Or maybe he'll just throw his unconscious body into the Phantom Zone. That's more Superman's way than the heart eating thing. That's more my thing, I guess, since I laugh so much I must be a truly sinister fuckmonster. Batman winning the fight against Superman always has enough presuppositions in Batman's favor that everybody simply believes Batman can defeat Superman, any time and any place. But more to the point, Batman will probably always beat Superman because that seems to be the more challenging story for a writer to write. And they always want to attempt the more challenging story! I'd like to say more surprising too but, at this point in DC history, it would be more surprising if a writer chose to let Superman win. You know how Batman has prepared to take out any other hero if they go bad? What if Superman has used his x-ray vision to give Batman super cancer that can be activated with one more small blip of x-ray vision, leading to Batman's ultimate demise. Sure, it'll probably take about six months but Superman can just hide in a quasar until then. I bet the residents of Kandor aren't actually dead! I bet Superman implanted them in Batman so they can end him at any time! They probably live rent free in Batman's brain! If I don't stop, I'm just going to list all five thousand ways I figure Superman can kill Batman. I should probably keep the other four thousand, nine hundred, and ninety six ways of stopping Batman for future Batman Loves Superman commentaries. Batman keeps pressing Superman about Superman's "What if Batman turns evil?" contingency plan. Batman is such a narcissist. What makes him think Superman would have any trouble stopping him?! I bet he's already given Alfred some special Kryptonian tea which causes impotence whenever the person who drinks it is around kryptonite which Batman surely noticed by now so he never has any kryptonite on him when he's out whoring around as Bruce Wayne which is when Superman will strike. Four thousand, nine hundred and ninety five ways left!

"Oh, uh, right. Sentimental!" replies Batman as he positions his bat cape to hide his bat boner caused by thinking about his sex toys.

Batman and Superman discover a mold for six batarangs which obviously means The Batman Who Laughed only made six batarangs with which to infect six heroes with Batman Who Laughs juice. And I'm sure they can only be used once because that makes it easy to follow the plot. Save six heroes and Batman and Superman win! And the first hero they need to save is Captain Marvel. Or is it Shazam now? I mean, it shouldn't be Shazam because then Billy Batson can't say his own superhero name without killing the power across several city blocks.

Of course Captain Marvel can kick Superman's ass. Captain Marvel is magic! But then again, he's also an inexperienced child. But then again, Superman wouldn't want to hurt a poor innocent child! So see? This fight is already more exciting than a Superman/Batman match-up where Batman would be a pile of ashes/broken bones/cancer in seconds!

I just remembered that this issue was called "Who are the Secret Six?" At first I thought, "Oh boy! The Secret Six will be guest stars. But then I realized, "Oh, see? Finding a mold that can make six batarangs at once obviously means it was just used once and only six heroes have been turned. I hope the big surprise will be Batman and Superman getting killed by six more turned heroes just when they let their guards down." Batman Loves Superman #1 Rating: C. It gets an average grade because it's exactly what I expected written exactly as averagely as I expected plodding the same old Batman Loves Superman ground as I expected. And while I might normally drop the series, I'd forgotten how much fun it is to write about a comic book that I'm completely biased against! Hey, at least I admit it! Try reading one of those other comic book review sites that think they're objective and just see how much fucking garbage they'll recommend to you. I mean, the Weird Science blog loved Neal Adams Deadman comic book! At least for a few issues before they could no longer make excuses for how thoroughly fucking awful it was! At least my review began with, "Holy fucking shit I think I just found the anti-Bible!" Or words to that effect. It would be narcissistic for me to remember every single word I've ever written!

#Batman Loves Superman #Batman #Superman #DC Comics #DC #Joshua Williamson #David Marquez #Alejandro Sanchez

0 notes

ciathyzareposts · 6 years

Text

Spellcasting 301 – Sand castles in the sand

By Deimar

Ernie Eaglebeak’s Journal #3: Beating the GLYs is proving to be harder than we anticipated. Of course, we had already beat them at weight lifting and partying, but now we have to build a sand castle, belly flop and a drinking contest. And that’s not even the end of it. But we can’t stand down now. Afterall, we are fighting for our right to PAAAaaaaaaaaaartyyyyyyyy.

Will I find some of these chapter’s photos in Shutterstock?

Ok, inventory and finance management is getting on my nerves. The item limit is stupidly low, which means that when venturing far from my stash place, the Plaza, I can only take the spell book with me, check what I am going to need there, restore and move along. The time limit gives you some breathing room, but not enough. In the end most of the time I am just skipping going to timed events like some of the contest to fully explore and gather items in new areas so I can replay the zones being more optimal with my movements. It gets tiresome after some time.

The other problem is finances. With the starting gold plus the 200g you can find in the sack that dropped from the carpet you are set at the beginning. But then the game starts to open up and I am starting to suspect that in the end I will have to buy everything in the town. And there are very expensive things out there. As I commented in my previous post, I suspected you can sell things in the pawn shop and I was right. The designers even let you click on the signpost in the wall to get a nice interface to manage transactions. I have been selling what I consider trash, such as the empty gold sack or other containers (I feel sorry for Sid and Otto as I sold their bag and suitcase, but it is for a good cause). Those give very little money, but enough to buy some of the least expensive things. Items bought from other shops give more money, but I am refraining from selling those as they might be useful later on, even if they have been already used in a puzzle, like for example the studfinder and the two-by-fours.

The bane of my existence

The only other source of money I have seen is the casino. I’ve spent quite some time trying to see a pattern in any of the three games there. First you have a Squat machine, a simple slot machine. I have never even getting close to winning anything. Then you have blockjock, a card game where you have to bet on whether the next card revealed will be lower or higher than yours. Of course, the cards are completely original and there is no clear hierarchy of values so whatever you choose you always end up losing. The last one is the maze. A mouse is freed in the center of a maze and you have to bet which gate he will use to get out of the labyrinth. The casino uses different mice for each round, with names such as Herman B. Squeak, Uncle Twitchy or Lord Rodent. As this one seemed like the game with more chances for winning, I spent some time annotating results, trying to see a pattern in gates, rodents and the like but to no avail. The game even doesn’t let you save inside the casino. Everytime you enter the casino you are told “This house is crookeder than me pappy’s back” so I guess there must be something you can do to cheat these gamblers and until then you are going to lose every single time, but it is eluding me for the moment.

If I continue having problems with my money, I will probably end up reading Ilmari’s clues from a few post ago as I waste a lot of time taking things to the pawn shop and paired with the inventory limit it is getting annoying. With that said, I managed to make some progress and saw more of the following contests in the tournament and more zones. Let’s start with the morning following the party.

Castle building

The next contest is sand castle building, on 1.30pm on Monday. As there was some time before the contest and I still had no idea what to do, I went for a walk to see the shops that were closed during the weekend. The first one is the surf shop, which sells only two things. The first one are a pair of dehydrated falsies. I am guessing that one will be useful for the wet t-shirt contest. The second is an absorption pill. As that didn’t tell me anything I bought and tried to eat it, with the message being that now I could swallow a ton a water, so I think this one will come in handy for the drinking contest.

Shouldn’t they sell some actual surf stuff?

The other closed shop is a dance club called the “Club Club”. “Why?” I heard you asking. Well, it is a prehistoric themed dance club, where boys have to hit their dance partners with a foam club in the head to ask them to dance. Neat, but not very useful at the moment.

WIILMAAAAAAAAA!!

Seeing as those seemed like dead ends, I waited for the sand castle tournament. Everyone was there at 1.30pm and it seemed like the YUs, as per usual, were doing extremely well an the Pharts were doing… something, I guess. As per usual. Trying to make a castle ended up in nothing but with Sid complaining about in his youth he used to be very good at building castles. PEAWEE to the rescue!!. The regression spell usually reverts things to their infant selves. Used on Sid makes the trick and he remembers how to make sand castles, but he needs a shovel. A quick restore and a trip to take the shovel from the stash and the contest is won. So far so good.

Come on, Sid made an entire city, the only a castle and we only get 10 points over them? This tournament is rigged!!

You have some time between Sid finishing its sand city and the contest ending but I don’t see anything else to do. I am still wondering if there is any way to make the YUs score worse, as there seems to be time to do so but nothing I tried worked. In any case, now we are ahead for 185 to 150.

Wild wild north east

After the contest ends, a wave conveniently cleans the beach showing a metal object under the YUs patch of sand: a right-hand ratchet. UPPSSY (spell of opposites) on the ratchet makes it a left-handed ratchet which is exactly what the workerman at the Stream of Consciousness needs to repair the bridge. I mean, after giving him the bolt from the hardware store.

At least I didn’t have to also repair the bridge for him

This opens the way to a new section. A wild west themed section of the map. First we find a roc nest with some plumage from the bird. If you are like me and have no idea what is a roc, it apparently is a Persian mythological big bird of prey, with several appearances in The Arabian Nights. I really hope solving anything in this game is not related to knowing more about the legend of the roc.

Seeing this image I am starting to wonder if I will have to try to mate with a roc… The specification of a MALE plumage seems fishy…

Continuing north we reach an old wild west town. With a saloon, a bank, a prospector shop and an entrance to the mine, which I guess is the same mine we can access from the Mouth of Cave. When trying to enter the saloon, a fairy comes and says that it is closed at the moment. Seeing as this is the “west” exit from the town, there is probably some way of entering.

Apparently it thawed when we passed by over it

The bank presents less problems to enter, but inside we can only find a sleeping banker. We can wake him up, but he offers no services to us.

He is just so happy to see anyone…

The prospector shop is way more interesting. They sell a lot of miner stuff but you need a prospector id card to buy. The only two things you can buy without one is a torch, at 179g, and a bulb repair service at 24g, which is exactly what we need to level up our sorcery at the guild hall.

Outside of the shop, at the mouth of the mine we can find another item from the carpet. A trunk containing a level 4 spell, KITCHEMY (lead to bread), and a piece of denim. Getting inside the mine is of no use, as it is pitch black, so it is time to rewind, sell quite a few things and see what’s on the mine. Oh, and get the bulb repaired.

Once inside, it looked to me like the mine was going to be your typical run-of-the-mill text adventure labyrinth, as every room from the entrance had 8 exits leading to copies of the same room. After trying to map it for a while I realized that it is not actually a maze at all.

Going west in almost any room takes you back to the mouth of the mine. When you go east in any room for a few steps you end up in the same room, but with water pouring from a whole. You can jump in the water and end up in the Stream of Consciousness. Going further east makes a giant squid appear from the water and block going further to the east. Nothing I tried made the squid go away, so there must be something to be done with it. Also, at some point I managed to get out of the mine via the mouth of the cave but I haven’t been able to reproduce it.

Maybe an alien from another dimension that will make everyone on Earth unite and fight together against the common enemy?

Under the sea

Having finished exploring the Northeast as far as I could go at the moment, I redirected my efforts towards the guild hall and the bulb repair quest. Once I returned it to them, I went up a level in sorcery and got another quest, requiring pearl dust to level up even more. Wanting to test my new powers as soon as possible, I decided that the spell at The Point that transforms humans to merfolk was the perfect challenge.

Gandalf the blue!

So I dropped everything at the base of the lighthouse to travel the treacherous path to The Point and opened the spell box. Lo and behold, now I was a merman. Just regular Ernie but with more scales. Once here, you can choose between diving into the ocean or into the harbour, so I decided to go with the great big blue.

I was greeted by a wonderful sea bed full of corals, with some fishes going around in the screen. The only thing that could be taken was a berry underwater plant. I decided to try to eat the berries and as soon as I did I was transformed back into a human and taken to the harbour by a pair of merfolks. I really appreciate that you can’t die in this game, but things like this with a potential dead end get on my nerves. Luckily, the spell box that allows you to become a merman doesn’t disappear after use, so you can go underwater as much as you like. At least until you get bored of walking from the wharf to the Point.

The berrie of my existence

In any case, once back in the water, I decided to try the underwater harbour section just to see a boot inside a lobster trap, which immediately remind me of the lobsterman in the wharf. After a few turns, the trap is raised to show a crab hiding under it, but you can’t take it. With nothing to do there at the moment, I followed the only available path to the west.

Then I reached a sunken ship, with an oyster just sitting outside. The oyster contained a pearl inside, so I took both. Inside the ship I found a medallion with an inscription saying that whoever wears it is protected by the god of the sea. Which useful underwater, so I started to wear it. Following the only path available I reached the outskirts of a merfolk city. And the portable bar I dropped from the carpet.

I think the image follows the solemn Disney tradition of hiding a penis somewhere

And then the time limit on the spell ran out and I was dragged once again to the wharf without any of the items I was carrying. Funny, are you feeling it yet? So back to the water I managed to get into the city and meet a gorgeous mermaid that seemed interested in Ernie. She takes Ernie to her room (seduced by his charm I guess, whatever it may be). There we can take a look at a parchment in the floor showing a map on how to get to a throne. Of course, you can shag the lady fish, but I will leave that to your imagination.

I hate when people don’t simply send the location on Google maps…

The final room in our underwater trip is the merfolk museum. The museums talks about the city of Sitnalta, a sister city of Mer City that was shoot up to the skies long ago and lost to the merfolks. It contains a throne, a replica of the real one in Sitnalta, with a plaque saying that there is a legend about returning the four seahorses of the Apocalypse to the throne to restore the former glory of the Mer people. So at last I know what the seahorses are all about. And the fourth one is just there also, inside an egg in the museum. Now I just need to know how to reach the real throne using the map in the other room.

Merfolk roolz!! Long life the seahorses!!

The last “puzzle?” here is how to get the items out of the water, but with the trap moving every few turns it was an easy answer. You just have to open the trap and empty whatever you want out of the water inside. Of course, the time limit on the spell makes this operation take a few trips, but all is good and sound once everything is outside.

Back to the tournament

But not everything is shiny. I spent a lot of time exploring and trying things in the new scenarios. Coupled with the time spent tidying up my finances, in the end I didn’t have much time to prepare for the next two events. At some points I even sacrificed them to keep going on. Still, I tried both of them with little to no success.

The first contest is a belly button dive in the pool of the hotel at 10.30 am. Once the judge and her entourage arrives, they put up a stratospheric diving board to see who makes the biggest splash. I tried several things here, like for example using the roc call to see if it would pick up one of Ernie’s brothers to a bigger splash, or the mutation of the KITCHEMY spell, BOTCHEMY (peel to steel), or try to jump myself, but nothing worked. Everytime, the two Pharts on the contest do a horrible performance and the YUs are awarded 175 points to 50 for us. Basically, none of the other previous contests matter anything because this one gives a lot of points.

Come on, falling on your head from that height will make more of a blood splash than a water one. I call cheating!!

There is also a drinking contest a 7.30 the very same day. And it goes equally bad. The contest is a two parter, with the first bar consisting on seeing who mixes more drinks in the alloted time, and the second one consisting in drinking the first part results. After a first successful attempt, I managed some progress by giving Vince, the Phart in charge of mixing drinks, the portable bar I found at the bottom of the ocean. Although the contest goes a little bit better, it is still far from a competition, as the portable bar is broken and not working properly. UPPSSY the mini bar makes it a big bar, but still is not enough to win the contest. For the drinking part, I think I will only need the absorption pill, once I manage to mix a bazillion drinks.

Madam, Have you checked your spine? Feels a bit too curvy…

And with that I think it is as good a time as any other to finish this post. I will keep working on trying to win those two contest and probably will have to replay some of the game to have more time and better finances at this point.

Final remarks

Some of these might seem obvious after reading the post, but many of them have only occurred to me while writing about my experiences. I think it might be interesting to you to know what I am thinking about how to approach following sessions.

The medallion might be the way of defeating the giant squid in the mine, so it is one of the first things I will try

It dawned on my that I can possibly wear the roc plumage before using the call and trick a female roc. If this is a way of winning the diving contest or just how you can get to the sister Mer city is still unknown

There must be a way of returning the mining town to its former glory or otherwise the closed saloon or the bank serve no purpose. PEAWEE maybe? Actually, I might need to do something with the water at the Stream of Consciousness. Try some spells even.

No idea what that KITCHEMY spell can be used for. The only thing I can think is that there will be a escape from a prison by eating the lead-to-bread changed gate. Although the rust spray seems like it can be used for the same purpose.

I am not sold on changing RATANT to its mutated spell yet, even though no mutated version of any other spell has been of any use.

Somehow a plate of magic mushrooms appeared in my inventory at the Plaza. Maybe something I left has changed but I can’t see what

The Laxative at the grocery store will be probably used in the arena

Still have no idea how to open the closed door at the aquarium or to take the key from the rummy at the groggery.

Ok, ok. But only because you asked to play in NAUGHTY mode… Pervs

Inventory:

9 pieces of gold

Bathing suit (worn)

Glasses (worn)

Spell book

Golden Seahorse

Auburn tube, umber tube, sienna tube, brown tube, tan tube, beige tube, sepia tube

Kaleidoscope

Studfinder

Two-by-fours

Instruction Sheet

Confirmation Letter

Trophy

Cloak

Text book

Nose shield

Deflated pool float

Otto’s suitcase (spare tie)

Pimento Moss

Some suction cup-covered gloves (left by Batman)

Package of breadsticks

Shovel

Conch

Boot

Tuft of male roc plumage

Left-handed ratchet

Treatise

Sweet smelling seahorse

Plate of magic mushrooms

Parchment

Medallion

Oyster (pearl inside)

Egg (fuzzy-feathered seahorse)

Portable bar

Denim

Miner’s torch

Potential items:

Diamond ring (1500g from Pawn Shop)

Pulverized pearl (15g from Hardware Store)

Strawberries (6g from Grocery Store)

Laxative (39g from Grocery Store)

Bread (3g from Grocery Store)

Rust Spray (10g from Souvenir Shop)

Roc Caller (79g from Souvenir Shop)

Greasy food (5g at Beach by Snack Bar)

Slimfish (33g from Fish Market)

Dehydrated falsies (45g from Surf shop)

Absortion pill (30g from Surf shop)

Spells:

Level 1 spells BIP (produces soft music) BIM (produce soft mucous) FOY (create daiquiris)

VOY(create dungarees)

Level 2 spells FRIMP (levitation) FRUMP (legislation) SPUNJ (enlarge tree root) SPURJ (enlarge wee fruit) Level 3 spells RATANT (spell mutation) RATTAN (shell mutation) PEAWEE (regression) POWWO (digression) UPPSSY (spell of opposites) DOWNSY (spell of opossums) Level 4 spells KITCHEMY (lead to bread) BOTCHEMY (peel to steel)

Map:

Score: YUs – 700, Pharts – 265 (I think it’s quite even, don’t you agree?)

Session Time: 3 hours Total Time: 10 hours

Note Regarding Spoilers and Companion Assist Points: There’s a set of rules regarding spoilers and companion assist points. Please read it here before making any comments that could be considered a spoiler in any way. The short of it is that no points will be given for hints or spoilers given in advance of me requiring one. Please…try not to spoil any part of the game for me…unless I really obviously need the help…or I specifically request assistance. In this instance, I’ve not made any requests for assistance. Thanks!

source http://reposts.ciathyza.com/spellcasting-301-sand-castles-in-the-sand/

#retro games #dos games #retro #crpg #adventure #amiga #oldcomputers #8bit #16bit #blog #repost

0 notes