#maybe i'll anonymously write a fic
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if i had a nickel for every au spawned from twitter that i SWORE i was going to be normal about
#i'd have like. five. which isn't a lot but IT KEEPS HAPPENING#stranger things#platonic stobin#steddie#steve harrington#robin buckley#eddie munson#here we go again boys#i've had this floating in my head for a Minute and i was like#nah i'm not gonna do it#maybe i'll anonymously write a fic#but no we're mombin posting on main#i think on twt we agreed it's a 'what's the worst that could happen' situation#platonic co parents can be so so so personal#also i have One more stobin wip and then bg3 again i swear#when i have a baby i Will be putting my giant black wings on beforehand#they have to know what kind of family they're coming into#cw pregnancy
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Nebs, I have been consumed by that Steddie fic finder ask that you reblogged awhile ago that was about the fail Stoncy, one sided relationship that turned to Steddie. I’m so upset that I haven’t been able to find it, have you had any luck?? I want to read it so badly!!
i have not had any luck. I've scoured various AO3 additional tags (past jonathan/steve/nancy especially), looked at jonathan/steve/nancy relationship tag with various filters, filtered the steddie tag, etc. I have spent... a long time looking for it. I hope it's found but it seems like it's either lost on tumblr or was deleted :(
#findaanswers#Anonymous#fic search#the stwg did go off with a fail stoncy brainstorm though. maybe one day I'll write something like that. but probably not :/#steddie#PLEASE SOMEONE FIND THIS FIC. CONSUMED BY FAIL STONCY.#I say ‘went off’ as though I was not one of the primary arbiters of angst in that thread lmao
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I would love to see a look into the first few days at home with Carol and Therese and their parents. Between Therese adjusting to new parenthood and Carol falling in love all over again as a mother, something she was worried she wouldn’t feel. First bath time and, of course, watching Therese blossom into motherhood while Carol tries to capture pictures of her and the baby as best as she can.
I’m not sure if I’m missing other fics of yours. Thank you for tagging the ones you did, as I hadn’t found some of those.
Honestly didn't know if I'd ever write for this verse again. Pleasantly shocked to find out I still can. Hopefully the result is okay, thanks for the prompt :)
Sequel to this, though you shouldn't need to read both to enjoy the new stuff.
Most new mothers were nervous about bringing their baby home for the first time. At least that’s what Therese gathered from the admittedly few inquiries she’d felt comfortable enough to make. The women at work who’d had babies, customers at the furniture shop looking for pieces to fill a nursery. And Carol, obviously. All of them expressed a certain amount of anxiety over taking their newborn away from the safety of the hospital, the experts.
Therese did not share that feeling. At all. After hours and hours of labor, of Carol receiving dirty looks from the staff, and then several more days of having to be so careful in their interactions, Therese was more than ready to get home.
Abby drove like a grandmother (Carol’s words, not Therese’s). Not that Therese minded, not really. All that mattered was being out of the hospital, not having to pretend anymore.
It was quite possible that she’d never been happier to step into the apartment on Madison Avenue. When the labor reached its worst point, Therese distinctly remembered pleading with Carol, begging her, that they be allowed to go home and sleep, that she couldn’t possibly take one more second of this. Carol promised that they’d be home soon, all three of them, that Therese could rest as much as she needed, after she’d made it past this one last hurdle. Carol promised it would be worth it.
Carol was right. She usually was. Carol was right and Therese was exhausted, and the more she thought about it, the more she realized what a miracle it was that they’d been allowed to leave the hospital with their daughter. The longer the pain had gone on, the weaker Therese’s filter became. Carol was supposed to be…what? Her aunt, her friend, her caretaker? What lie did Carol even settle on? Therese couldn’t remember. She couldn’t remember, and she could’ve ruined it so easily, exposed them. Especially near the end.
The thought sent a shudder through Therese’s sore body. Carol noticed, even though she was busy holding their baby, cooing at her softly. Carol always noticed.
“Are you alright?” she asked, frowning.
Therese didn’t like the frown, hadn’t seen it in several days. She walked over to them, put a lingering kiss on the baby’s head of dark curls. “Yes,” she said, and she meant it, because Carol had also been right about that new baby smell and how soothing it was. “Just tired. But we’re home now.”
Carol kissed Therese in the same place Therese kissed the baby. “We are at that. Why don’t you go take a shower? I’ll take care of her, and deal with this,” she said, nodding to Therese’s bag from the hospital, a few groceries from the kitchen that Abby hadn’t put away when she dropped them off. (Only because Carol insisted Abby had done more than enough already, that she needed a rest too. Carol was right about that as well).
“You sure?” Therese asked.
“Absolutely. Go, take your time. We’ll be right here when you get back.”
Therese thought she’d seen all of Carol’s smiles by now. The sly, almost smirk when she was being mischievous, teasing. The unrestrained grin when she laughed at one of Abby’s jokes that gave Therese a glimpse into her childhood. The impossibly tender one she bestowed only upon Therese herself. This one was new though, the look Carol had while gazing at their baby. It was close to one that Rindy always received, but different somehow. Therese resolved to study it more, soon, once she felt a little closer to human.
“I love you,” Therese said because she could do that now. Say what she wanted and look at Carol how she wanted and kiss Carol how she wanted without worrying about getting caught.
Carol looked up, gave her that smile so tender that it almost hurt. “I love you. So much. We both do.” Carol kissed her softly, still careful of the baby. “Call if you need anything.”
“I will not.” It might startle the baby. “Anyway, I have everything I need.”
***
After Therese’s shower, the baby was hungry. Therese didn’t realize they had an audience until she heard the familiar click of her own camera.
“Hypocrite,” Therese said, one arm of her robe empty as she nursed.
“Excuse me?” Carol asked, setting the camera on the coffee table.
“You yell at me if I do that to you, sneak a picture like that.”
“I have never yelled at you once, in all the time we’ve known each other.”
Therese gave her a look.
“Fine. But I certainly haven’t done it within the last nine months.”
That, Therese couldn’t argue. It was probably closer to a year, at least. Carol had been exceedingly gentle with her ever since they first started talking about this, having a baby together. Therese smiled as Carol sat down on the sofa to join them. “Is it even legal to photograph someone while they do this?” she asked, only half-joking.
“It can’t possibly be any more illegal than some of the photos you’ve taken of my breasts.”
Therese couldn’t argue that one either. “Just don’t get any ideas about putting that one on the mantle.”
Carol kissed her bare shoulder. “You are so beautiful.”
“And you need your eyes checked.”
“You are,” Carol insisted. “That picture won’t come out as good as yours, but you’ll see. You’ll see how beautiful you two are.”
Therese smiled. She didn’t mind being photographed like this. Not when it was just Carol, and not when there were so few photographs of her own childhood. Besides that, there was Rindy. Harge and his parents could never get enough pictures of Rindy. Carol didn’t need to be there to complete the image, and Harge’s parents outright preferred she wasn’t. There were family portraits, the kind that did go on a mantle, of the three Airds together, but not nearly enough of Carol with her daughter, no Harge in sight. Therese did her best to combat that now, but remained acutely aware of all the moments they didn’t see, all the time Rindy spent away from them.
For nearly a month after he discovered Therese was pregnant, Harge refused to let Rindy come near the apartment, and if Therese thought about that for more than a few seconds, she’d be a wreck, so she forced herself not to.
She also forced herself not to think about what would happen if he went back on his word to bring Rindy over this weekend, to meet her sister.
***
Sleep when the baby sleeps. Everyone said it. Carol kept saying it. Therese was exhausted, needed to sleep. She found it exceedingly difficult to sleep when the baby did.
It was all down to those first few seconds. Those few endless seconds after the delivery, but before she’d heard her child’s voice. It was nothing, ultimately. Being born was quite the shock, and babies didn’t always know how to handle it right away. The doctors had taken their baby off into a corner and done some things Therese couldn’t see, and then she was fussing and wailing just as she should, everything fine.
Therese was assured, multiple times, that it had nothing to do with the baby’s lungs. She believed that. She’d heard them working exceedingly well in the following days, no trace of a problem.
Still, those first few seconds.
The whole thing felt so taxing, so hopeless sometimes. Getting pregnant in the first place and all that entailed. She and Dannie barely looked at each other for weeks. All the endless, necessary deceptions, Harge’s reaction when he found out. Therese thought for awhile that she’d lost Carol her child because of her own quest to have another. And then all those hours, all that pain, and the baby wasn’t crying, and what in God’s name would it have done to them, to Carol, if the baby hadn’t cried?
A moot point, thank God, but it kept Therese awake every time their daughter slept, kept her checking again and again to make sure that the slower, deeper breathing hadn’t slowed too much, hadn’t stalled altogether.
“Sleep,” Carol said. “I’ll stay up with her.”
It wasn’t something they’d talked about. Therese never actually expressed what the problem was. “You’ve been up just as long as I have,” Therese protested.
“Maybe, but I wasn’t the one doing the heavy lifting this time,” Carol joked, kissed her. “I promise, I won’t let anything happen to her.”
“Is it always like this?”
“What, the worrying?”
“The constant sense of impending doom, yes.”
Carol’s smile was warm and apologetic and a bit sad. “Unfortunately, yes, for awhile. This one just gave us an early start with that dramatic entrance. It never stops, but it gets easier. You learn how to carry it better.”
“You mean it?”
“You’ve seen me with Rindy, what do you think?”
Therese thought she should probably try for a nap instead of answering that question.
***
The baby had her own room, a lovingly appointed nursery filled with furniture Therese would’ve thought wasted on a newborn, if not for the fact it was their newborn. Their daughter had a room of her own, it just didn’t see much use.
Therese woke from her nap slowly. She’d collapsed onto their bed, finally able to close her eyes knowing that Carol’s were open. They’d both need to work on that, couldn’t possibly keep watch on her every moment of the day for the rest of their lives. They would work on it later, Therese decided.
As she awoke further, Therese became aware of Carol’s voice, nearby but muffled. Rubbing the sleep from her eyes and shifting on the mattress, she winced at the residual soreness in her body. Her eyes found the bassinet. It was empty.
Therese didn’t panic. Carol’s voice was nearby, Carol was with their daughter, so it wasn’t fear exactly. Therese just liked it better when the baby was within her sight.
She moved slower than normal, still fuzzy with sleep and sore from the birth, but she felt better than she had before. Her breasts ached in a way she still wasn’t used to, and that would need to be dealt with, but finding Carol and the baby was her highest priority right now.
She wasn’t scared. Honestly. She just missed them.
Therese padded down the hall, followed Carol’s voice to the nursery. At least the room was getting some use. Carol was sat in the rocking chair in the corner, a gift from Abby. The baby rested in her arms, fussing. They weren’t hungry cries, Therese recognized that, still more than a little amazed that she could. Carol had eyes only for their daughter, hadn’t noticed Therese in the doorway.
“Oh, shh, shh, shh. What could be so wrong, my darling, hmm? What’s wrong? It’s alright, little one. Everything’s alright. Keep this up and you’ll wake your Mama.”
Some of the soreness in Therese’s hips and back migrated upward, to her mouth. She couldn’t stop smiling, hadn’t ever imagined she’d see Carol be a mother in this way. Even while they were trying, she hadn’t let herself get this far ahead, not fully.
“Shh, let Mama sleep, let Mama sleep.” Carol chuckled then, traced over their daughter’s features with an impossibly gentle touch. “Not that I’m one to talk about timing, I suppose. You know, I was late, the first time I asked Mama out to lunch. What a way to start, hmm? But Mama waited for me, didn’t she? Thank God Mama waited for me.”
Therese finally made her presence known, padding softly into the room. “I’ll always wait for you,” she murmured. “I like it better when I don’t have to, but it’s worth it. You’re worth it.”
Carol looked up in surprise, but her hold on the baby never faltered. She smiled when she saw Therese. “And you are entirely too quiet. Not at all like this one. I told you you’d wake her, didn’t I?” Carol asked still tracing the baby’s features.
“It’s okay,” Therese said, stopping in front of the rocker. “I sort of like it when she cries. I know that’s absurd. I hate it, but I don’t.”
“I know, angel,” Carol said, the barest flicker of sadness clouding her eyes. “She’s here. She’s right here.”
“I know.”
“Maybe she just misses you,” Carol said, gaze shifting between Therese and their newborn as if she couldn’t decide who to watch.
“I’m right here too,” Therese replied.
With some maneuvering, Therese switched places with Carol, sat in the rocking chair with the baby. Carol kissed the baby’s head before passing her to Therese.
“Impossible,” Carol murmured. She was kneeling in front of the rocker now, one hand on the baby, the other on Therese’s knee.
“What’s that?” Therese asked, somewhat surprised that Carol was right, that the baby stopped crying once Therese was holding her.
“I didn’t think it was possible for me to love you more than I already did,” Carol said. “But now I have this, another piece of you, and you’re both so perfect.”
Therese saw tears threatening at the corners of Carol’s eyes. “Hey,” she teased. “None of that. One of my girls stops crying, another starts up?”
Carol chuckled. It was only a little shaky. “Your girl, huh? Is that what I am?”
“I sure as hell hope so, at this point.”
Carol stood, moved so she could kiss Therese. “Always, sweetheart. Always.”
Therese sighed. “I didn’t think I could be this happy,” she admitted.
“I didn’t either. But I am. So very happy.”
***
The baby was not happy.
“Are you sure the water’s not too hot?” Therese asked for the third time.
For the third time, Carol promised that it wasn’t. “Everything’s new for her, that’s all. She doesn’t know what’s happening. Rindy did the same thing.”
“Was she this loud about it?”
“No,” Carol admitted. “But you did say that having her cry wasn’t all bad.”
Therese sighed. Crying was one thing. Screaming bloody murder as though they’d tossed their child into a vat of boiling acid was another. “We’ll have to get the neighbors a bottle of wine.”
“I’ll grab something the next time I’m out,” Carol said immediately.
Therese’s lips twitched. It was a sweet offer, but there was no way Carol would remember it. “It’s okay, sweetheart, shh. Hey, hey, hey,” she said, as low as she could over the wailing. “You’re okay, you’re okay.”
“Nearly done, my love,” Carol added. “Almost over, darling, you’re okay. Don’t you want to be nice and clean for when your sister arrives?”
She didn’t, judging by the pitch of her cries.
Okay. Their daughter didn’t like baths. Therese was clear on that now. Deafeningly clear.
Their baby was small. Not worryingly so, Therese was told, given her own genetics. She worried anyway. She didn’t feel small now as they tried to get her through her first bath without the paint coming loose from the walls. Thank God for Carol, who warned Therese how slippery the whole thing would be, held their daughter safely when Therese underestimated how right Carol was.
Thank God for Carol in general. But now, specifically, for holding the baby as assuredly as she did while Therese ran soft cloths down her body. Carol was always so damn steady, and it was perfect and Therese loved her for it.
Except she knew better today.
Finally, somehow, they finished the bath. Carol cradled the baby against her, wrapped her up before the cooler air could even touch her skin. “There you are,” Carol murmured. “There’s my little one, shh. All done. All done and you did so well. Now you’ll be nice and clean when you meet your big sister.”
Therese’s chest tightened. She couldn’t tell if it was in a good or bad way. She kissed the baby’s hair, dark strands that looked so much like her own and set about cleaning up while Carol took their daughter down the hall to get dressed. This time being held wasn’t enough to calm her, and the cries persisted as Carol took her to the nursery. Carol was Carol, kept saying sweet nonsense things the whole way, as if nothing at all was wrong.
It wasn’t, Therese knew that. It wasn’t and it was, and it hurt.
Therese set about clearing away the bath things. The baby kept crying, and that did funny, awful things to Therese, but in this moment, she was thinking more about Rindy.
Harge was Harge, and still mad at them, at the audacity of what they’d done. Therese heard him tell Carol more than once that this baby would never be Rindy’s sibling. It was hard not to hear him, hear both of them, when they argued about the baby.
Rindy was excited though, and Carol kept saying that Harge wouldn’t keep her away, not for long. Because he had a hard time saying no to Rindy about anything, and because somewhere, deep down, he understood that Rindy needed Carol, needed Therese too.
Therese had to defer to Carol on that last one, had a hard time seeing it herself. Especially when he had kept Rindy away for all those weeks right after he found out.
Therese was happy. They were both happy. But it would never be like it should, not if Rindy wasn’t here. And Carol feared that too. Therese heard it in her cheerful baby voice that was just a little too cheerful, felt it in the way Carol tossed and turned last night, even while the baby slept and they were both exhausted.
Therese had been nervous about, well everything that came with a new baby. Carol was either confident in her own experience, in the two of them together, or she was faking it very well, for Therese’s sake.
This, Rindy, this was what Carol feared. And Harge was late already.
Therese cleaned the kitchen and living room as best she could. For the first time, Therese seriously wished they could hire a housekeeper, that it wouldn’t be a risk. Daily chores were much harder to accomplish with a newborn around.
Therese dusted the mantle haphazardly, eyes catching on a photo of herself and Carol with Rindy. Those were rarer than either Therese or Carol would’ve liked. Rindy wasn’t here enough, and when she was, Therese was usually the one holding the camera. Abby had taken this one, Rindy pressed close between Carol and Therese, the three of them sharing a park bench.
There were no pictures of Rindy with the baby.
The cries had turned somewhat less deafening by then, so Therese risked heading to the nursery. The baby was dressed now, Carol supporting her head as she paced the room. “Is it safe?” Therese asked.
Carol looked up at her, smiled softly. “We’re getting there, I think.”
The phone rang then. Carol and Therese looked at each other.
Would Harge at least call this time to say he’d cancelled their plans? Historically, the odds were about 50/50.
“Want to go to Mama, sweetheart?” Carol asked, as if Therese hadn’t seen the dread in her eyes, shared it. “Here we go, why don’t you say hi to your Mama?”
The transfers were easier now, no longer terrified Therese so much. Carol kissed the both of them when Therese’s hold was steady. “Be right back,” she said over their daughter’s continued fussing.
If Therese didn’t know Carol better, she’d think everything was fine. She didn’t say anything when Carol shut the door behind her, to shield them from any arguments with Harge.
Sighing, Therese took up Carol’s pacing. At least it gave her an excuse for not staying still. “Shh,” she cooed, breathing in the baby’s scent, hoping it would calm her, that the feelings would flow between them. “It’s okay, it’s okay, Mama’s got you. Mama’s got you. I’m sorry that was hard, but you’re all finished now. All finished, sweetheart.”
Therese wished that were true. Was it normal to start lying to your kids this early? She’d have to ask Carol.
They’d had the conversation more than once. Was it selfish to bring a child into their lives, their life? When that child would face so many more struggles, have so many more rules to follow, was that fair? Clearly, they’d made a decision, and Therese didn’t regret it, never could.
Still.
“I love you,” Therese murmured. “Mommy loves you, so much. Aunt Abby loves you, even though she’ll drive me crazy teaching you things she shouldn’t.” Therese paused, closed her eyes. “Rindy loves you. She doesn’t know you yet, but she already loves you, I promise. We all do, and that’s all that matters, okay? No matter what people might, might say to you, or,” Therese swallowed, collected herself, “we love you, and that’s all that matters, okay?”
It wasn’t. It would never be the only thing that mattered. Therese had to hope it would be enough.
When her own voice was replaced with silence, Therese could hear a little bit of Carol’s phone call. Carol hadn’t raised her voice yet, and that was odd when it came to Harge. She was being careful, careful not to upset their baby.
Therese heard something indistinct that could’ve been Abby’s name, followed by several knocks on the door. They were too hard. If she could hear them from the nursery, they were too hard.
Harge’s knocks often were.
Therese heard Carol say something else, then nothing for a moment. She heard their front door opening.
“Mommy!”
Rindy’s excited voice carried through the apartment.
“Oops,” Rindy giggled, a little softer but still clear. “Daddy said I have to be quiet so I don’t scare the baby. Sorry, Mommy.”
“It’s okay, snowflake, it’s okay. Oh, there’s my special girl. How are you, sweetheart?”
“Good. Can I see Aunt Therese and the baby now?”
“Of course you can. Come here, sweet pea, come inside.”
Despite the noise of the phone, and Harge’s usual demand to be heard, the baby wasn’t crying anymore.
***
The next time they bathed their newborn, Carol didn’t do half as good a job at hiding her nerves.
“I just think it’s too early to parade her out in front of everyone. What if she gets sick?”
It really, truly wasn’t fair. Therese was a new mother, anxious enough already without Carol adding to it. All these months, she’d done everything she could to ease those worries. Except for this one instance. So of course, this was the time that her words had no effect at all.
“Rindy’s been here,” Therese said calmly. The hands that were so quick and steady with a camera worked gently along their daughter’s skin, “and Abby, and Harge.”
Carol huffed out a breath, spoke some nonsense words to calm the baby, addressed Therese again. “Harge barely counts. He nearly tripped over himself getting out of here.”
“Are you complaining?”
“Hardly.”
“That’s what I thought. Anyway. We’re not taking her out for a stroll in Times Square.” Therese shuddered at that. “She’s staying right here, with us and one other person.”
Carol talked to the baby instead of Therese.
Therese sighed. “Carol.”
“Yes, dearest?” she asked, keeping up the singsong voice.
“Waiting until Rindy met her first was fine. More than fine. But now?”
“Now what?” Carol prodded, still in baby-tone.
“He’s my best friend.”
He was more than that. “I know, darling.”
“He wants to meet her.”
“Mmm.”
“I can’t exactly say no, under the circumstances.”
“Would you like me to do it?”
Therese sighed again. “No. Because I don’t want to say no.”
“Well then. That’s that.”
They didn’t talk about it again during the bath, or while they dressed the baby. Her protests over the evils of water had tired her out, so they tucked her into her crib, kissed her goodnight as the clock struck noon. They didn’t talk about it again until they reached the living room.
“I have hormones,” Therese said as an opener. “Lots of hormones. You’re the one who said that. So, you’re not allowed to be mad at me.”
“I’m not mad at you,” Carol said instantly, deciding then and there that she was the worst person on Earth. “God, not in the slightest. Come here?”
Therese did, thank God. They went to the sofa. Carol held her close.
“I’m not mad at you,” she repeated.
“I know.” Therese adjusted herself, pressed in closer against Carol’s side. “I just said that to get your attention.”
Therese’s lips quirked at the corners. Carol huffed, kissed her. “And now there’s two of you to torment me. What the hell am I going to do?”
“You love it.”
“Yes. So much.”
Therese settled her head against Carol’s shoulder, tangled their fingers together. “It’ll be fine. I promise. Trust me.”
“It’s not you I don’t trust.”
It was ridiculous. Carol knew that. Dannie loved Therese, but not that way. He didn’t want children of his own, at least not yet.
But he had one already, and the implications of that had kept Carol up at night for days now, even doing a better job of it than their daughter.
Dannie’s daughter.
“He wouldn’t do that,” Therese said, her free hand going to Carol’s chest, rubbing circles over her heart.
“Do what, my love?”
“He’s not Harge.”
They hadn’t actually talked about it, why Carol didn’t want Dannie to meet their child. His child. Carol should’ve known they didn’t have to. Therese was too smart, too perfect, and she’d created such a perfect little girl.
“He wouldn’t do that,” Therese repeated. “Not to me, not to you. Even if he wanted to, he couldn’t. You know that.”
Carol knew. His name wasn’t on the birth certificate, wasn’t on anything. “He could try.”
“He won’t.”
“You’re so sure.”
“I am.”
“Because you don’t see it.”
“See what?”
“The two of you. How beautiful you are together. Dannie cares for you, and he’s not an idiot. How could anyone,” Carol paused. Her heart beat too fast under Therese’s palm. “How could anyone see that, you and her, and not want it?”
Therese looked up, tilted Carol’s chin with her fingers until their gazes connected. “You’re right. He’s not an idiot. He’s not stupid, and he’s known for a long time who I belong to.”
Carol closed her eyes, couldn’t take the intensity in Therese’s. Therese kissed her jaw until Carol looked at her again.
“He knows who I belong to. Who we belong to,” she added, turning her head for a fraction of a second towards the hallway, the nursery. “He doesn’t want to interfere. If he did, it wouldn’t matter. You know that, or we’d never have gotten this far in the first place.”
Carol wanted to tell her how it was different now that the baby was real, was here. Wanted to remind her how people changed when they had children. Wanted to tell her again, make Therese understand, how easy it was to fall in love with her. How watching her hold a child—Therese’s child who looked so much like her—was enough to make anyone throw away any thought they’d ever had, any plan or dream or hope that wasn’t centered on Therese holding that baby.
Carol didn’t say any of that. She couldn’t, would never be able to put it into words. And Therese was right, Carol knew that. Everything Therese said was right.
Also, they had to get the house ready for Dannie’s arrival. Carol kissed Therese, told her she loved her and that she was right, and went into the kitchen to prepare.
She tried to stop hoping that Dannie would be hit by a bus on his way over, was somewhat successful.
***
Dannie arrived without any sign of grievous injury. In fact, he came bearing gifts. One gift, actually.
“I don’t know much about babies, but the girl at the store said this was the latest thing, that it’d be real helpful.”
A walker. He’d purchased and hauled across town a baby walker. Large, colorful, and prohibitively expensive for someone with his salary.
“It’s lovely, Dannie, thank you,” Therese said.
Carol had visions of Harge, all the extravagant gifts he’d used to keep Rindy’s affections over the years. “It is,” she said lightly. “It’s useless, at the moment, but very lovely.”
The grin Dannie had worn up to this point froze in place. Therese said Carol’s name, not in the way she normally would, the way Carol liked.
“I only meant, dearest, that she’s a newborn. It’ll be weeks yet before she tries to hold her head up, let alone walk. But in a year or so, I’m sure we’ll be very glad we have this. Thank you, Dannie.”
Carol put her arm around Therese’s waist as she spoke. Dannie had hugged Therese when he came in, after putting his enormous box down. He’d hesitated, asked if it was okay to do so, if he wouldn’t hurt her. Therese embraced him in response, and he’d held her very gently, very careful. He’d kissed her cheek and told her how pretty she looked.
Therese reiterated how they’d be all ready to go when the baby started walking, thanked Dannie again. “Be nice,” she mouthed to Carol behind his back as she invited him to sit down.
Carol preferred that Therese rest as much as possible, still very aware of the aches and exhaustion her love was dealing with. So, Carol found herself serving drinks and snacks to Dannie McElroy, and, when she couldn’t put it off any longer, retrieving her precious baby girl so that she could hand her over to him.
He was right, he didn’t know much about babies. The man had no earthly idea how to hold one correctly, but Therese jumped in before Carol could, guiding his hands and providing instruction. Therese and Dannie sat close together on the sofa, knees touching as Dannie gazed at the child, wide-eyed and enraptured.
“Whoa,” he said, the picture of eloquence. “Holy…she’s amazing, Therese.”
Standing awkwardly in her own living room as she watched the three of them, Carol decided she hated how Dannie said Therese’s name. He’d never mispronounced it, not like so many others, never saddled Therese with an unwanted nickname like Richard had. The accent was terrible though. The distinctly New York tones rubbed away at the unique beauty of Carol’s favorite word.
“Did we really make that?” Dannie asked, all awe and wonder.
“Yeah, we did,” Therese replied, eyes shining. She poked his cheek, a teasing gesture, asked if his face didn’t hurt from smiling that hard.
“I can handle it,” he said, never taking his eyes from the baby.
He and Therese stayed that way, heads touching a few times as Dannie asked question after question about the baby and Therese and how things were going. Carol knew there were similar photos somewhere, probably buried in Harge’s parents’ basement. Pictures of Carol and Harge bent that way over Rindy, back when Carol actually thought that their love for this perfect being they’d made for each other might save them.
Therese’s camera was somewhere nearby, in their bedroom maybe. Carol had continued her amateurish attempts to document this new life that they’d brought into their own. She didn’t go looking for the camera now.
A small eternity later, Therese got up to use the restroom. The baby started fussing. Not crying really, just fussing.
Dannie’s eyes went wide as saucers. He suddenly looked like he was handling a live grenade. He looked up at Carol, let out a small, terrified chuckle.
“Carol? You wanna come get your daughter please before she does something or I do something or…or something?”
Carol blinked, went to the two of them.
“There you go kid.” Dannie looked immensely relieved to have Carol within arm’s reach. “Wanna see your Mommy? Yeah, I don’t blame you. Uncle Dannie’s not the best with women, is he?”
Carol took the baby from him. The small warmth pressing against her chest felt like coming in out of a blizzard, the kind where you couldn’t see more than a few feet through the whiteout. “Uncle Dannie?” she asked.
Dannie’s eyes widened again. He looked younger than he was, more a schoolboy than a grown man employed at a great metropolitan newspaper.
“Is that okay? Therese said, a few weeks ago…I mean we were just joking around.”
“It’s fine. It’s lovely,” Carol corrected. “You’re not that bad with her, you know. Not at all.”
“Yeah?” the hopefully boyish expression that received only made him look younger. “Thanks.” He sat forward on the couch. “Therese said Rindy got to see her the other day? How’d that go?”
Carol smiled, couldn’t have helped it if she wanted to. “It went well. It went very well.”
Dannie grinned. “Good. It’s nice, you know, having a sibling. I mean, Phil and I fought like cats and dogs sometimes,” he stopped, considered, “still do, now and again. But it’s nice, having someone. Girls’re probably better about that stuff anyway.”
Carol chuckled, remembering her childhood with her own sister. “I don’t know about that, but I think we’ll manage.”
“Yeah, sure you will. You and Therese can manage just about anything, I figure.”
The woman in question returned to them then. “Everything okay out here?” Therese asked, stopping to kiss Carol’s cheek, then the baby’s. “Is Mommy behaving herself, baby girl?”
Carol blushed. Her heated skin missed the warmth of Therese’s lips. “Everything is just fine.”
Therese’s eyes sparkled with love and mischief, and a hint of smugness Carol was sure to hear about later. “Good,” she said simply. “I’m glad.”
#carol#belivaird#my writing#anonymous#fic prompt#maybe someday i'll name the kid#feel free to leave suggestions on your way out#fluff#babyfic
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lol we are witnessing your gaiuskamilah to gaiusadrian evolution
HSJSJEKEJDKRKFK to be fair. ive always loved both. but it only sunk in the past few weeks (days) how much Worse gaiusadrian is especially after the bb: origins chapter and (un)fortunately i live for that. i'm putting adrian in situations and then crying that he's being put in situations. free him but also dont. i'll get bored.
#i wrote fic for gaiusadrian maybe i'll write one for gaiuskamilah... i have ideas. JDJDJSKDKDKDK#anonymous#answered
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Okay but like
Consider
Yakou as an inmate in Milgram for his killing of Dr Huesca (I'm using my reality manipulating powers to say that he, through some bs logic, survives the gas and doesn't get stabbed, just indulge me here)
NO YOURE SO RIGHT!!!!!
we can ignore the poison and stabbing stuff its fine we can say its just symbolism. dont even worry about it.
Yakou's crime is the easiest to plan out since it literally happened in rain code but like. i do wonder that if this alternate world existed how people would judge him (especially with how unclear and symbolic most of the MVs are). I feel like with Yakou's crime, it would be difficult to figure out until maybe when the second trials start. I feel like it could even go the direction of everyone thinking *he* killed his wife in the first trial.
there's a lot of routes you could go with for this AU and i love it
#moth speaks#ask#anonymous#milgranon#rain code#yakou furio#fuck how should i name this au since its separate from#the other one im doing#uhhh#hm#rain code cellblock au#might change that but it works for now#also thankyou anon for indulging me in my two interests#maybe after i finish writing my current fic#i'll start work on one of these two aus?#no promises#idea if i make cellblock a fic#instead of turning their memories into songs#it'd be easier to write if they turned into books instead#maybe maybe#idk yet
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I was wondering, where do you see yourself after the show ends (which isn't anytime soon but-)? Will you still be active in the fandom long after the show has finished? Cause I've asked myself this question and I think to myself, "Whoo wee the show WILL end in the future", I forget about that, it's like, "Wow, the show will end and I HAVE to move on eventually"
My typical rate for staying in a fandom hardcore once the source material is over (which even after S7 we will at the very least have at least one more novelization to wait for! <3) is two years minimum, but that was typically in shows where my main stay ship or dynamic had far less fodder than Rayllum, so I fully expect to still be here at least somewhat for like - five years, post-S7? I am very excited to let TDP span the entirety of my 20s in terms of fandom time
#like i could see by year 3 maybe writing less fic and obviously my meta will shift from#being less speculative to more like 'this is how they set everything up for the end' (bass boosted)#thanks for asking#dragons rambles#BUT YEAH I'LL BE HERE FOR A WHILE LMAO#anonymous
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I’m cheating with this one a little bit Leo, Elise, and/or Camilla, whichever you prefer.
“Did you find this yourself?” Leo asks, watching mayflies glide across the water’s surface, barely visible in the evening light. Water lilies float along the top of the pond, all still and untouched, coming in pinks and whites and greens. Hoshidan glades have their own charms, that much is certain.
“Me ‘n Dad did. He was showing me some boar hunting grounds, and then we found all this,” Kiragi explains. He plops onto one of the slopes, stretching his legs and propping himself up on the palms of his hands. “Isn’t it cool? Fireflies come out, too, we’ve just gotta wait until it gets dark.”
So they’ll be staying a while longer, then. Leo sits next to Kiragi, crossing his legs. “Would your dad know to find you here?”
ask game~~!!
#LEO!!! (AND KIRAGI!!!!) a snippet of a leo/takumi fic which takumi isn't even in lol#thank you for the ask!!! finally a wip that isn't xander/laslow lol#this is actually a completed fic i just didn't like how it turned out so now it's just sitting in my drafts.... sorry guys....#i might post it...? maybe i'll look at it again#anonymous#dots answers asks#dots writing games
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🖊
Rosaline is the middle child between Ulysses and Prufrock, and she's based on this version of NBQ/Greycat from the Broadway production:
She got separated from her brothers after the three of them left the butcher shop, unable to make it across the road to join them and getting lost in the city. She did her best to survive, eating out of the rubbish and steering clear of humans and territorial strangers, but it wasn't easy--especially after a fling with a passing tom produced her daughter, Caprizant. After that, Capri became her first priority, and Rosie would often go without to make sure she was well-fed and safe. When Capri was about six weeks old, Rosie barely escaped being taken to a kitten mill, and while the two of them were in hiding, they heard about Macavity's plans to raid the mills... and the Jellicles' counter-initiative to save as many kittens as they could. Hoping against hope this would mean she'd see her brothers again, Rosie decided to help them, sneaking in to unlock cages and try to organize escapes (making sure Capri was out of harm's way first, of course). And sure enough, Ulysses and Munkustrap ended up right alongside her, and there were definitely tears when brother and sister finally united. The three of them and Capri made it safely back to the Junkyard, where Rosie reunited with Prufrock as well and decided to make it her permanent home. There, she wouldn't have to constantly worry about surviving, and the new friends she'd made--among them Demeter, Bombalurina, and Socrates--made it that much easier to enjoy herself.
(Bonus point: my voiceclaim for her is Susan Egan.)
#She could honestly have her own novel-length fic--maybe I'll write that one day too... <3#cats the musical#OCs#my headcanons#asked and answered#anonymous
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if you're still doing the writing advice meme, can you do Taion? If not, you can just ignore me, no worries
As a rule, I’m always up for the ask games in my “get to know meme” tag. That’s what that is for :D There’s years worth of stuff to pick from there.
Anyway hmmmmmm he’s actually quite hard for me but I’ll do my best.
He is quite attentive, and as a result also quite sensitive. He’s pretty much always carefully keeping track of whatever situation he’s in, and he has to be pretty intensely distracted to stop being the most observant person in any given room.
Naturally, he’s wicked smart, but in a way where he’s better at putting the facts together into a series of conclusions than discovering patterns and deriving new information from them. Master of deduction, gets very bad analysis paralysis because he’s pretty much always aware that he’s dealing with impossibly large and granular datasets.
Despite that, Taion’s composure is very good as long as he’s allowed the proper emotional distance to the situation. I feel like it’s probably one part natural tendency to feel emotions very strongly (and thus needing a couple of steps back from them to be able to think clearly) and another of having always been in a position where he needs to be able to project a certain amount of confidence to be taken seriously. It’s not that his thinking really suffers from being deeply emotional, it’s more that it’s harder for him to have confidence in what he’s saying if he's feeling too compromised.
The direct result of this is that he can come across quite cold despite being truly compassionate. He genuinely doesn’t like it when people are upset, even when it has nothing to do with him. He’s drawn to Fixing Problems because that’s a more consistently useful than trying to rely on his emotional reasoning to comfort people, although he does understand the value of allowing people to decompress and just sit together with their feelings.
He will never use five words where fifteen will suffice. Economy of language and wit are completely overrated in his opinion, the reason languages have many words for most things is for granularity and preciseness. He's always trying to say exactly what he means, he doesn’t want to leave any room for ambiguity, which of course means that sometimes he will say the vaguest possible nonsense and then get offended of people can’t follow his reasoning.
#van's answers#Xenoblade Chronicles 3#Taion#anonymous#thanks for playing!#That last part is why I find it so hard to write him lmao#he has such a specific cadence to the way he speaks it's really hard to emulate without sounding like I'm making fun of him#and IDK maybe I am a little bit I am VERY much an economy-of-language kind of speaker#but in my defense this is something everyone in the fandom seems to struggle#like I'm just saying he's not using synonyms to sound fancy he DOES mean the PRECISE definition of whatever obscure word he's using#he's THAT kind of speaker#Anyway I love him so much. Characters whose intelligence is grounded in their empathy my beloved#I hope I'll get chances to write him being the cleverest in the future but as it stands all he does in my fics is suffer
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alright whenever you have time (and also the energy) I would love to hear your thoughts on the lantern rite epilogue! Have a good day <3
we're going to pretend that people following me will care abt genshin 3.4 lantern rite spoilers so we're gonna put my entire deranged mess under a cut hahaha
*gently holds* MY XVS......
truly this lantern rite had EVERYTHING although truth be told, like, the way venti was kind of shoehorned in was a little disappointing. i felt a little bit baited by the way the 3.4 TRAILER HAD THAT ONE CUT RIGHT where it goes from VENTI PLAYING THE LYRE in the harbor to XIAO LOOKING UP AT THE FIREWORKS outside of wangshu inn, and then we see the xiao bit in the actual cutscene on day 2, but absolutely none of venti until the epilogue. and also we never see venti playing the lyre during the event story so it's like. whoever edited that pv absolutely had xv on the brain. like. what the hell was that it was magical i feel higher than a boat right now
BUT ANYWAY like i don't even care how obviously shoehorned in venti felt bc the interactions were all SO PERFECT i love love loved them. i loved the way hu tao just RAN INTO WANGSHU INN and started shouting for xiao, and then talked death to him until he was like "yeah sure i'll go to your dinner". they are so besties i love them their friendship is everything to me.
THE WAY. XV INTERACTED. IN FRONT OF US. xiao just like "well. um. there's this. um. um." TOTAL PANIC MODE n venti had to SAVE HIM with like "huuuh? did you forget already? i'm a bard!" like HELLO why do they need a COVER STORY why are they making up COVER STORIES TOGETHER WHAT WERE THEY DOING TOGETHER IN THE MARSH EARLIER like what kind of GAY SHIT--
also i'm pretty sure when xiao started explaining his relationship to venti, venti fluttered his lashes at him. like, i recorded the whole quest (bc i didn't last year with the final part n i REALLY WISH I HAD bc i STILL remember the dRAMATIC GASP i had when we had that one beiguang moment in the cutscene), and when i rewatched it earlier i was like. "HANG ON. DID HE JUST FLUTTER HIS LASHES" n rewatched it like three times. maybe my game was just stuttering BUT IT DEFINITELY LOOKED LIKE IT and maybe i'll gif it when i get home from work tonight
BUT ANYWAY (2) point is that the expression work this time was ON POINT like whoever's doing all that over at mhy hq needs to get a raise pronto. venti going (¬‿¬) at all the other immortals was so immaculate. you aren't subtle little man!!!
it's probably just shipper goggles on to an extent, but i feel like the xv implications were really strong this time around, with the parallels to that fontch guy's ancestor, and the guiping n everything... i'm kind of disappointed that we don't get to actually hear any of venti's unobstructed thoughts on xiao; like the ribbing n implications at the dinner are a lot of fun (like, they were totally making out in the marsh before dinner. we all know this. it's very clear imo), but it kind of makes me wonder why we can hear xiao like... do his Very Heavy Implying abt venti's importance to him (though again, he doesn't outright say anything-- we know the full extent n depth of xiao's feelings abt venti (romantic or not) bc we can read his character stories, so technically really he hasn't told us jack squat in the current canon timeline), but the best we get from venti are smug expressions. those expressions are very telling, ofc, but a very unhinged part of me wishes that mhy didn't feel the need to wrap up the xv in layers of allegory and metaphor and just outright heard one of them say, "this person is very dear to me." i know it's just the rabid shipper in me, and i need to be sedated, but i was really kind of hoping that we'd see the allegory w/the fontch guy's ancestor n madame ping lifted away at the end n, like, see or hear it be bound to xv outright. just for purely self-indulgent purposes o(--(
but anyway (3) i also love love loved all the playful ribbing, witty banter, and prev event callbacks btwn the characters!! hu tao n venti canonically making a pact to be poetry friends was SO GOOD you just KNOW hu tao is gonna commission venti to compose a JINGLE for wangsheng advertising purposes later, while zhongli n xiao are like, "this meeting never should have happened. we are all doomed." somehow i legitimately forgot that xq n venti know each other from irodori n was like, "...huh?" when xq mentioning knowing venti for like, a FULL two seconds. the way venti was like "damn you know i was right outside this entire time. can you believe the way some people ignore the wind?" n zhongli was like "hahaha (✿◡‿◡) the harbor is very busy this time of year (✿◠‿◠) it is very hard see or hear an individual person's whereabouts (^人^)"
AND ALSO. PAIMON BEING ELECTED AS THE "MOST DISTINGUISHED GUEST." PAIMON YOU GOT IN THE WAY OF MY DERANGED SELF-DELUSIONMENT MANY TIMES THIS LANTERN RITE BUT THAT WAS PRETTY FUNNY. i thought it was interesting how no one nominated venti. like i was kind of expecting xiao to do it (but ofc he nominates traveler) which is fair honestly, n then i was like "IS LUMINE GONNA NOMINATE VENTI????" but then she nominated paimon n paimon was like "wait... me?????" n it was just EXACTLY like a bunch of adults telling the little kid they are the most specialest ever n they should have the honor of doing The Thing. as that little kid growing up, i know the feeling very well lol
there are other bits i'm just,,, rotating around in my mind, like venti and kazuha hanging out on the alcor, the way xiao goes "i can't taste the difference in xiangling's special almond tofu" when you go visit him afterwards, ALL THE GANQING THAT HAPPENED IN THE MAIN STORY I'M SO HAPPY FOR THEM I'M SO HAPPY FOR ME I WON VERY HARD THIS LANTERN RITE, n like,,, yeah!!!!
#asks#anonymous#(at my non genshin followers/mutuals) I'M SORRY FOR BEING DERANGED. EVEN THOUGH I'VE BEEN DERANGED FOR OVER A YEAR N A HALF#it's funny bc i never apologized for abruptly changing fandoms before gnshn. the shame of gacha gaming never dies lmao#ANYWAY i'm pretty sure venti just ate off of xiao's plate the entire dinner. 'let me get you another set of cutlery' says hu tao#'okay sure!' venti replies; already stealing xiao's chopsticks n eating all his food bc it's not like xiao's eating all that much#plus. i was thinking of that spices in the west event. n how to my surprise venti liked the almond tofu n grilled tiger fish...#been getting a lot of kudos on my xv fics these last few days hahaha; i mentioned to star yesterday that the saucy xv thing i wrote#waaaay back in late july is like 290 hits away from entering my top five ao3 fics by hits#and if that happened it would do what j/jk had never been able to do (which is break the b//nha chokehold over my hits stats)#(j/jk broke my records on bookmarks tho n i'm very proud of that i love you diner fic)#n star said we should throw a party if the saucy xv fic made it to top five n i was like.#a 'thank you to all the thirsty people for dethroning the shadow of b/nha that lives over me at all times' party????#n she was like 'yes. i think that is a wonderfully apt title' LOL#in the shower yesterday i was thinking abt the xvx week happening on twt n i Do have smth saved for the free day#this oneshot i started last july n then didn't finish until like two or three weeks ago but in the shower i was like#'muse... muse... you know it would be kind of fun if...' n i started thinking abt that livejournal au i came up w/as a joke months ago#so maybe i'll write smth real fast for that hahaha
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Hi! I just want to tell you that I loove your fic "Sunshine Riptide". I love everything about it; the summer feeling, the characterization of Pete and Patrick, the background Gabilliam, Patrick literally calling Arma garbage, THE BINGO HAT, Pete being a lifeguard, Patrick owning a record store, Patrick's shitty ex boyfriend that acts like a mexican soap-opera villain, the underwater stuff, everything
I love it, seriously <3 thanks for writing this fic
thank you for saying so!! <3 honestly, i love that fic too. it's probably my fave one shot i've ever done and it was so so much fun to write.
#love you describing the ex as a soap opera villain that's exactly what he is lmao#anonymous#answers#ahh i miss uploading fic#i still occasionally try and write#been working on this one fic for ages maybe i'll just say fuck it and upload the first chapter even though i'd hoped to finish it all first
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psss bestie, maybe you should post your long fics/prompts on ao3 as stand-alone ones?
u see anon, this is why they dont pay me the big bucks. Ur Mind Is So *chefs kiss*
anyway its TRUE i could absolutely blow that closing gap btwn piarles and That Other Ship wide open effortlessly if i just posted everything currently sitting in my google docs rn. however. i am a coward
#me wanting my writing to be validated vs me being terrified of being perceived on ao3#i wrote so many e/o nfl fics i put them on the nfl rpf tag singlehandedly and the shame i felt about it. woof#anyway ur right ur right maybe i'll find courage and be brave for everyone else#also u sent this literally right after i rb'd that anti-mv0 post and i was like ''oh no please god dont say ive touched a nerve'' LOL#ask reply#Anonymous
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What are some of your fav aus?
omg i'm a total sucker for olden/medieval/historical aus. i loveeee dystopian coupled with angst sheesh. sacrilegious aus are so yummy to me and mafia/business/assassin aus that have angst ... HHAHAH and though this is more so a trope, but an alternative universe with soulmates? damn i will die for those. i dont gravitate to one au, but more so if the plot is good, whatever the au is, i'll read it !!
#thesunas.#— mailbox.#anonymous.#this reminds me how i have sooo many drafts/plots for series fics#but i never get the chance to write for them because of the commitment to getting chapters out regularly#but once i have more time#maybe i'll grapple in some of the series' that i have planned!!
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I wish I was on Tumblr/twitter after S2 aka at the height of the Steve revolution, he was so fucking iconic in that season( he always is but still) I'm sure the love for him was overwhelming not that people don't love him now but it maybe calmed down a little? Especially with everyone having another white boy to thirst over 😂 I think all in all when you take everything in he's the general audience's favorite but I'm thinking the S2 hype would have been unparalleled.
okay get ready for an annoyingly long post.
so I joined the fandom in 2018, almost a full year after s2 came out, so I didn't experience the immediate reaction. but I WILL say that 2018-june-ish 2019 was my favorite time in this fandom, especially among steve lovers (possibly until the past few months where it appears we're getting a renaissance.) I made some really amazing and talented friends on here that have since either deleted or just straight-up abandoned their blogs over the hiatus. but I would log on here every day to amazing fanart and fics and general unhinged nonsense and it was just so FUN to thirst and be weird openly on each other's posts. like, if you think my tags are ridiculous now you should see the stuff I said there back then, openly, under the many smut fics I would reblog from my friends who were just as crazy about him as I was.
now, its not like the talented creators and amazing work have just disappeared, I know SO many creators that write amazing fics and make fanart and gifsets that blow me away. but like, the ✨️culture✨️ (derogatory) has unfortunately changed so much on this site that sometimes it feels weird putting ns//fw or even just thirsty stuff on my blog now. like I know these amazing creators are putting their work out into the world but reblogging it I get......shy??? is that possible even though y'all don't actually know me?? idk. but I don't engage with content the way I, and so many others, used to. and I know that's a discussion being had in the creative communities too, that engagement is down because people aren't reblogging and sharing content the way they did 2-3 years ago, so I'm trying to work on that to support everyone making amazing content for us.
I really think it's not so much that people have calmed down, they've just moved those unhinged thirsty thoughts to discord chats or DMs or whatever makes them feel more comfortable, not the dashboard for the world to see. maybe we need to get back to that though, because the collective fandom losing our minds over s2 steve was the highlight of my tumblr experience, and I think with the right feral audience we can bring that back 🖤
#I've been thinking about this a lot lately actually#I dont really have a group here anymore and I hardly interact with anyone outside of occasional replies and reblogs and stuff#so sometimes I feel like the weird girl sitting in the corner shouting about thirsty shit in the tags while everyone else has like#message convos to do that in#I'm not complaining bc I never reach out to anyone either#but sometimes I get really self conscious about posting my actual thoughts or the content I like so I just......#backspace and exit out of the post screen lmao#and with fics and stuff idk. I just get SO shy about it sometimes but??? why??? yall's writing is so good???#maybe I'll ease into reblogging unhinged content again#anyway tl;dr old fandom lady waxes poetic about the way things used to be#steve harrington#anonymous#answered#sidenote. I miss pepper. my first fandom friend. </3
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Hi ! i hope you are doing well
7. Any worldbuilding you’re particularly proud of?
8. What song would make a great fic (to either write or read)?
17. What highly specific AU do you want to read or write even though you might be the only person to appreciate it?
I'm still sick so I could be better? x'D But thank you for asking! 💜
7. Any worldbuilding you’re particularly proud of?
Well, the entirety of Hyperborean tbh? Because I got to write an "eternal winter" post-apocalyptic world with an entirely new social structure and get into the nitty-gritty of their everyday lives in a way that was very interesting. Some of it I would probably have written differently had I written it today, but I'm still very proud of it.
Another is Autonomy which, unlike Hyperborean, was less about creating an entirely new world and more about tweaking the canon Marvel concepts into something that fit a Space AU AND my idea of HYDRA being a parasitic virus instead of an ideology. I had so much fun figuring out how that should work and how to best showcase it in the story.
Because, to be honest, that's the best part? Not the world-building itself but the satisfaction I feel when I can make it relevant to the story. I'm not fond of info dumps so, incredibly often, I have a lot more information than ever makes it into the stories. But that's just a choice I have to make to keep the story well-paced, even if I LOVE world-building.
8. What song would make a great fic (to either write or read)?
Oh dang, a question about music x'D Honestly, for being someone who loves music as much as I do, I'm really, really bad at connecting music to writing or being inspired by music. I used to be back during my teenage years but, somewhere along the way, that just... faded? Not sure why.
ANYWAY. I think I'd have to go with Wicked Game by Chris Isaak. Because I'm a sucker for that kind of push-and-pull and "reluctant to fall in love" trope, especially if it has a hint of danger or drama. Here for it.
(Fun fact: The version of this song that I listen to the most is a cover made by the Finnish band HIM, which, incidentally, is a remnant from the previously mentioned teenage years. I was edgy back then)
17. What highly specific AU do you want to read or write even though you might be the only person to appreciate it?
That's tricky. Though I guess the easy answer would be a fic I'm already writing which is literally just for me. Like, I don't think anyone else (aside from my wife) will read it xD
And that's a Barduil AU (as in Thranduil and Bard from The Hobbit) where Thranduil fails spectacularly the first time around and gets a do-over, basically reliving the events of the Battle of the Five Armies — with his memories intact — and do better (and perhaps save a couple of lives on the way).
It's hyper-specific and hyper-catered to my own likes and desires. We'll see when I finish it and if I'll even bother to post it. But do know that I'm having an absolute BLAST writing it. Because it's entirely in Thranduil's POV and that is, quite possibly, my favourite POV I've ever written. He is a delight.
Questions for fic writers
#Amethystina Does Ask Memes#Anonymous#That highly specific AU has been in the making for years#I find it difficult to prioritise it over other fics#Since it's basically just for me#But maybe I should do something about that#It brings me so much joy#We'll see!#I have so much I want to write x'D#Also#I'll get to the rest of these tomorrow#I need to sleep now x'D
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I love your writing so much. What's your favorite thing you've ever written (line, chapter, work, tumblr post, anything)??
help this is so sweet 😭😭😭 not to be dramatic but this turned on the light in my weary little heart
also let's pretend i didnt leave this sit in my inbox for like 4 months, yes?? (im so sorry)
ummmmm um um oh god what a question
i mean it's a beautifully kind question but it's one that forces me to confront what ive written, which, unhinged!!!! i havent thought about my fics in a while (as you can probably tell from my lack of updates 🥴)
it's hard to pick a favorite line or anything of the sort, bc i actually like a lot of lines. not in a damn-that-line-is-the-world's-most-gorgeous-prose kinda way, or in a i-bet-readers-are-gonna-love-this kinda way, but in a hey-i-like-what-i-did-there kinda way, bc what i did ~there~ usually was take something from the (my) real world, whether a sensation, an idea, a phrase, a song lyric, a color, and bend it into fuel for a story. that's part of the magic of writing for me. actually that's nearly all of the magic for me (the other portion being that somehow sometimes the feelings i intend to evoke are, indeed, evoked in some readers, as per their comments)
when i glance through any random fic of mine, especially the more uhhh dramatic ones, i can see so many traces of... me? my life? my world? and it reminds me of how much writing gives me. it's just a place where i express myself i guess?? even as im telling a story about completely different people in a different setting from my own (sadly ive never had a threesome with my ex and his sorta ex, sorta nemesis, sorta lover!!). goddamn it, i knew this questions would make me desperate to write again. how dare you remind me of the joys of writing!!!! fuck you!!! (ilysm)
as far as whole fics go (and pls god dont make me pick a chapter, i might die), im still very partial to warm water, bc that's my baby, bc it's one of my first fics (it basically reignited my love for writing??) and bc i really didnt expect it to resonate so much w folks. the response was wild, never in a million years did i see that coming. also bc it helped me process some things that i didnt realize needed processing, and bc it got me through the start of the pandemic and through writing an rma thesis. and bc it's pretty sizeable for my standards. but it's also like.... early!jo work. i like to think ive grown a little bit more into my own writer's skin since?? but it was huge in growing said skin. so it's my baby
i also like unlike, bc it pairs my very Dramatic Writing StyleTM with smut, which, as it turns out, is my comfort zone somehow (??) and i like as trouble ought to do bc it broke my post-warm water angst drought and i experimented in that one. it's an acquired taste, but hey, aren't we all?
alright let me stop there, before i fall in love with the act of writing again,
#here's what happened -- i thought id wait to reply until i had like. good news to share about writing#turns out my writer's.....b..bl...bl*ck was like. haha youre cute for thinking id disappear#anyways! let's try it in the reverse order! i'll look at the things ive written and maybe in turn the writing zest will return to me??#thank you so much beloved. like. seriously#i fear i have now been reminded of how much i like to write fic#i am terrified of the consequences of this reminder!!!!!!!!!#no but seriously tysm dear im so very honored that youd even wanna know and it really really means a lot#and i know i dont have to apologize for this but i am sorry about the lack of writing that ive done / shared the past year#ask#anonymous#my fic#writing
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