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polywifey · 1 year
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Where Does the Time GO?
Time marches on and you cannot stop it. What are you waiting for? #polyam #relationships #lovelife #lovebigger
HOLY MOLEY! Time totally got away from me. I was thinking the other day about how I have not had a chance to sit down and breathe, let alone blog. My Christmas decorations are still strewn around my new place and my tree is still up. Do not judge me. Time has skipped ahead quickly with my family, friends, and my relationships. I am happily in my polycule. I just celebrated my 14th wedding…
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nicsplace · 2 years
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So many people feel the need to compete with others, to put others down in order to pull themselves up, to make others look bad. The rat race has become just that - a race full of rats. Instead of building each other up, many are tearing others down and stepping on/over them to get ahead. I've never understood the need some have to do that. My goal has become being the very best version of myself that I possibly can and that includes supporting, encouraging and cheering others on. If you feel the need to be competitive with others, you do you. As for me, I am in competition with no one. I have no desire to play the game of being better than anyone. I am simply trying to be better than the person I was yesterday. #Goals #StrongerThings #BetterEveryDay #Winner #BeTheBestVersionOfYou #YouDoYou #IllDoMe #BeBetter #DoBetter #LiveBetter #LoveBigger #StepBack #KeepMovingForward #BeKind #KindnessCounts #MomTalk #SingleMom #SingleMomLife #TexasGirl #Over40 #GenX #Follow #Influencer https://www.instagram.com/p/Cd-362_OvzM/?igshid=NGJjMDIxMWI=
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sprints, extremes & technology that enables balance : a conversation about people & health standards
 my purpose for sharing this very personal information with you is two-fold:
1)      to come out from behind the blinds and share a very real struggle that i’ve always had with food, due to a childhood diagnosis of an auto-immune and metabolic disease, Type I Diabetes (T1D).
2)      to propose solutions that can be implemented in the ever-changing policies of healthcare and drug development. these solutions can help us more proactively detect psychological impacts and behavior patterns for patients living with chronic diseases, in hopes of providing preventative care to mitigate developing co-morbidities.
i never knew i had any sort of problem beyond the fact that i would have to take synthetic insulin for the rest of my life. my introspection and research on the topic proved me wrong, however.
i am a patient living with T1D, now, self-diagnosed with an eating disorder related to living with this chronic disease.
i, like many living with T1D, was diagnosed as a child.
in first grade, i can remember my classmates relentlessly saying “i want diabetes too! you have snacks ALL the time!”
snacks, you ask?
yes. lots of them.
available at all times of the day.
snack time was the best part of the day, for most.
little did everyone else know, eating was a chore for me.
i was already tired of fruit snacks. the endless supply of fruit roll ups, gushers and air heads made me feel victim to food.
eating regularly was required of me to live. or so I had always been told.
something that seemed so joyful for everyone else, was not for me.
why?
because i was taught that food was required for me to have at all times during my early diabetes education, now over 25 years ago.
nevertheless, “breaking the rules” by eating outside of school snack time made me a “cool kid,” so i played along.
as a 10-year-old, i was finally old enough to go on an insulin pump.
this gave me more freedom from the relentless snacking needed to maintain control.
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i grew into puberty, trained as an athlete and the hormonal changes caused crazy sugar swings, meaning that routine snacking was still a requirement.
as i approached college to be a pre-med student and prepare myself for a career that would help me contribute to the cure of my disease, the experimenting began.
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while many of us with T1D are very dependent on others, we aren’t usually as quick to admit this dependence. We often spend our lives trying to prove that we are as independent as one could be and fully capable of doing ANYTHING we set our minds to.
what does that matter within the context of behavior and living with a chronic disease?
it matters because what i discovered in college and beyond is that the slightest patterns of exposure form habits. this is true in the context of people without a diagnosis.
in the framework of my own medical history, however, patterns of others’ behavior and my own diabetes education had an even greater impact on how i’ve perceived and treated myself over the years.
now, back to my childhood.
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diabetes education is a bit overwhelming as a 6-year-old, and i’d bet anyone else, too.
even at this young age, my parents, twin sister and i were taught the “rule of 15.”
this meant, if my blood-sugar was anywhere below 70mg/dl, I would consume 15g of carbohydrates and wait 15 minutes before re-checking to make sure my levels had risen before proceeding to continue what I was doing beforehand.
seems simple.
but unfortunately, it’s not. especially for those of us living at the expense of a synthetic insulin produced by drug manufacturers.
time and time again i’d go low- just slightly under that 70mg/dl mark.
and time and time again my parents would treat me with sugar.
fruit snacks became the quick acting treatment for us because many of them have 15g of carbs. we’d eat a pack and wait 15 minutes; only to find that my blood-sugar was even lower.
we’d eat another pack.
and wait another 15 minutes only to find that it’s still too low.
over and over again. multiple times a day.
this momentum was not sustainable.
for me.
but more so, for my parents; both working full-time jobs and running a family owned (fishing) business.
so after changing my insulin regimen a few times, with failure, we started fast-tracking the treatment process for lows instead.
it was the only logical choice.
instead of treating with 15g, we changed to 45g (yes, a full meal of carbohydrates) and we’d pair this with a fat or protein to ensure it stayed level.
seemed to work.
i only realized later in my twenties that the social glam of food didn’t appeal to me.
you see, that pattern of treatment stuck even after i got through puberty and became more controlled.
as an opportunist, i’d go low and see that as a chance to eat whatever goodies i could find fast. 
at the conclusion of undergrad, the social norms of being fit (and my pursuance of a fitness journey) spurred on a behavior pattern that i’ve termed “closet eating.”
i recognized that i got excited to go low.
so i would overdose on insulin to keep my blood-sugars this way, giving me a medical excuse to eat whatever i wanted.
for the most part, however, i’d keep it secret.
no one would know that i’d just eaten the entire bag of oreos (except my husband, who helped me realize i was sick)!
because if they knew, they’d also know that i’d blown my diet and failed at self-control.
my pride got in the way here. i couldn’t let anyone know that i was a binge eater.
thus, my medical necessity for food became an addiction.
a crutch.
an excuse to allow me to indulge in foods that i shouldn’t otherwise be consuming.
the cycle of overdosing to overeat and under-dosing to under-eat became a part of nearly every single day and so did my two-a-day workouts to maintain my figure.
I KNEW this was a problem.
but i lived in this world and continued to push boundaries until just about 6 months ago.
at this point, i realized that i’d been doing this because i believed the LIE that i was told when i was a kid. during my nutrition classes it seemed that “i NEEDED sweet food to survive.”
i fed into this lie and failed to confront it out of fear.
my fear of success. the success of having controlled blood-sugars and a healthy, balanced body that doesn’t rely on food to keep sugar levels normal.
i confronted that fear.
i threw out all the processed foods in our home.
i stocked up on fresh fruits, veggies, proteins and healthy fats.
and i bit the bullet and finally invested (yes, it’s expensive) in a Dexcom G6 Continuous Glucose Meter (CGM).
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this gave me information about the trends of my bloodsugars in real time.
now, when i even begin to drop low, i can see the downward arrow and proactively treat before i plummet. this enables me to use the rule of 15 again; now with fresh fruits, healthy fats, patience and reassurance that its working, instead.
while i won’t say i’m completely free from the chains of sweets i was bound to before, i’m making strides in my health by recognizing the decision triggers (with relevance to stress and bloodsugar levels) that caused me to binge eat.
why is any of this relevant to you, and to drug developers, doctors and policy-makers?
because i’m not the only one that has had my health behavior and psychology impacted by the diagnosis of a chronic disease.
and because these behaviors aren’t uncommon.
there are 8 million reported cases of eating disorders in the United States (1). of these 8 million cases, 7 million are women. and to give you a sense of how this mental health disorder is exacerbated in those with chronic disease, at-least half of these women live with t1d or another auto-immune or chronic disease that requires tight control to live (2).
wow.
big mental health impact on comorbidities here, huh?
recognizing these patterns can help us treat patients better within the clinical trials process and beyond.
treat patients better
management of chronic diseases have shown an impact on self-perception based on diagnosis, training and early patient education (2).
for example, diabetes requires close control of many things beyond blood-sugars, including (but not limited to) body states, weight management, types and amounts of food consumed and the timing and content of meals. on top of this, some foods are labeled “good” and others, “bad.“
stigmas, in this case, associated with certain food groups, create a sense of worth and value (or lack thereof) based on our choices.
success meant that i chose “good” foods 100% of the time.
i wanted to be “good.”
and because of this, i’ve had an “all or nothing” mentality for all of my life. 
i’m an extremist. 
very competitive with myself and others.
i never gave myself the chance to “balance” because the elimination of things (food groups) was all i’d ever known.
i had a reaction to someone telling me about “balance,”one day.
i immediately thought, “that’s half-assing and i’m a full-asser.”
there’s a famous quote referenced by many; “life is a marathon not a sprint.”
however, with the “eat this, not that” nutrition education i received as a child, i naturally trained myself to eliminate anything that distracted me from getting to my proverbial finish line in whatever the circumstance was. 
sprinting was the only way for me.
which brings me to my point on treating patients (and people) better:
what if we changed the way we delivered our diagnosis and early disease education? what if we illustrated balance and acceptance of people at all levels- through small acts of kindness? 
what if we refreshed every 5-7 years with our providers or used an existing mobile app to develop new habits?
what if we listened and empathized to people (i think lots of us do, already!)?
what if we followed patients and started asking more specific questions in the review of systems during medical exams?
this is a policy change that could allow for us to track thought patterns and identify risks for greater outcomes and co-morbidities.
in my own case, for example, if my endocrinologist asked me if i struggled with carb counting or food my answer would likely be “no.” 
but if i was asked what my typical food intake looked like on a daily basis,
and if i was purposefully excluding certain types of foods and why,
my answers would reveal behavior patterns (some of which would be closely linked with my blood-sugar numbers) that would show an unhealthy relationship with food.
in drug development, this policy change could increase the information collected in trials and has the potential to reveal greater efficacy and/or superiority through patient reported outcomes (PROs) and even validation of new endpoints.
and that’s just the beginning of the positive change.
Want to know more about how you can help?
Connect with me and let’s start the conversation.
i’m colleacting information from patients, providers, caregivers and those interested...and i want to hear your opinion and experiences!
sources:
1. Eating Disorder Statistics. Eating Disorder Information and Statistics. https://www.mirasol.net/learning-center/eating-disorder-statistics.php
2. Between Children's Diabetes and Eating Disorders. Eating Disorder Hope. https://www.eatingdisorderhope.com/treatment-for-eating-disorders/special-issues/diabetes/children. 
EXCERPT OF THIS IS PUBLISHED IN Life Science Leader Magazine, November 2018 issue. https://www.lifescienceleader.com/doc/chronic-disease-management-and-the-need-for-control-0001 
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joe-faris · 6 years
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Think Bigger, Be Bigger, Love Bigger⚡️ ≈ Model @free_skier #bodybuilder #tvreporter #yamaguchiasahitv Photo @luciole_rina0510 ≈ Online 👉 farisusa.com @joefaris Store 👉 @twelveoaksmall @4mendetroit ≈ #detroit #joefaris #joefarisdetroit #joefariscollection #joefaristshirt #mensfashion #menstshirt #fashiondesigner #projectrunway #twelveoaksmall #newcollection #motorcitystyle #thinkbigger #bebigger #lovebigger #fashionindetroit @fidetroit
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gabv3ntur0us-blog · 4 years
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sometimes it's better to react with no reaction... . . . . . . . . . . #livebig #livebigger #livelife #livehappy #livefree #livefreely #love #lovelife #lovebigger #lovefreely #loveyourself #party #chill #yolo #celebratelife #cheers #tgif #hangover #hangout #drunk #moments #weekend #weekendvibes #mood #partytime #nightout #nightlife #clubbing #havingagoodtime #stressfree (at Alabang, Muntinlupa) https://www.instagram.com/p/B78QJqzgZ2J/?igshid=ylctx0fntlbp
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katrina-is-a-mom · 5 years
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Acceptance
“Acceptance is like a muscle. The more you use it, the easier it becomes.” I heard this quote today and thought it was right on. But can we really feel acceptance for things we don’t understand? Can we truly find acceptance of those who believe things we don’t, fight for things we disapprove of, or behave in ways we find wrong?
 I spend nights (many nights) praying that acceptance continues to grow, that more people find it in their hearts to love bigger, and that empathy becomes an everyday lesson for so many. I can’t help but fear for my children. As a parent of a child with special needs this fear can consume you if you let it. I try to remind myself that we promote acceptance in our house everyday all day and my children will carry that with them into the world. They will share this with others. They will set an example and it will be recognized. But how do I prepare them for those who will not accept them or reject these thoughts?
 Honestly, I don’t know. All I can do is remind them of my love, our love at home, and the love they have for each other. Never be afraid of who you are. Always defend those who cannot defend themselves. Stand up for what you believe in. Never stop learning.
 We are all growing and working to better ourselves every day. It’s ok to change your mind or find a new perspective on something. It’s ok to stick to your values while respecting someone else’s that differs. Acceptance doesn’t mean you have to change who you are, it means you are willing to embrace someone different than you.
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popculturescholar94 · 7 years
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#truth #empathicsoul #progressivechristianity #love #positivethinking #kindnessmatters #lovebigger #god 📷 by #spiritualpoetres
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oliveshoe · 6 years
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Celebrating the life of a strong, smart, insightful woman today. 💗#lovepeople #celebratelife #livebig #lovebigger
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zanectc · 6 years
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Sunny gold amazingness with my goddaughter Leela & her mama Sandita! Love these two so much & thankful for a day of play with my mijas!! 😘😘 /////////// #farmersmarket #love #family #goddaughter #austin #lovebigger #liveubuntu (at SFC Farmers' Market)
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polywifey · 2 years
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When Chaos Erupts
My partner saw me at my worst and sprang into action. Is this what you image a partner looks like in ENM? #polyam #ENM #dating #lovebigger
Life went to fun to train wreck in a matter of weeks. My husband got a new job that is 49 miles away from our house. Then I got a new and better job that was 68 miles away from the house. Summer came – we listed our house. We got an offer and accepted it. The sale fell through due to the buyer lying to everyone. Relisted the house and had to drop our price even lower than our original…
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nicsplace · 3 years
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So many people feel the need to compete with others, to put others down in order to pull themselves up, to make others look bad. The rat race has become just that - a race full of rats. Instead of building each other up, many are tearing others down and stepping on/over them to get ahead. I've never understood the need some have to do that. My goal has become being the very best version of myself that I possibly can and that includes supporting, encouraging and cheering others on. If you feel the need to be competitive with others, you do you. As for me, I am in competition with no one. I have no desire to play the game of being better than anyone. I am simply trying to be better than the person I was yesterday. #StrongerThings #BetterEveryDay #Winner #BeTheBestVersionOfYou #YouDoYou #IllDoMe #BeBetter #DoBetter #LiveBetter #LoveBigger #StepBack #KeepMovingForward #BeKind #MomTalk #SingleMom #SingleMomLife https://www.instagram.com/p/CPR1YKoF3Nn/?utm_medium=tumblr
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The Manifesto: 28 to 29
year 28 was the hardest, but most rewarding year of my life.
it was hard because i didn’t set boundaries.
i fell in the gray
& then flopped into darkness.
i lost a lot of wisdom here,
right before i lost a lot more than that.
thank God it was all temporary.
and all a part of His design.
though it was hard, 28 was rewarding because it was a season of growth, of building trust and of resting in God’s provision for me to step out and do a lot of things in faith- including making my journey from darkness back to light, very public.
the season for me, at 28, was rest.
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i don’t think i lost any friends, though i’ve learned that we’re all in different seasons.
some relationships ebb and some flow during different seasons of life. 
one relationship that has stayed constant (though dynamic and supportive) is the one i have with God.
i have learned that what you put in (the amount of heart, soul, discipline and commitment), will multiply blessings out. 
through my recognition of this, i’ve gained new friends.
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the lifelong kind.
the kind that invest their energy into me, like i’ve done for others, only to be disappointed in the outcome.
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the kind that chase God and encourage me to do the same.
the ones that challenge me and pray for me.
the ones who uplift me when i’m too stubborn to see that i need uplifting.
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the ones who are patient with me- long enough for me to learn on my own and meet them where they are, once i get there too.
these friends (more than those pictured, and all of you) are blessings to me.
you are seeds of joy in my life- regardless of what season you were planted.
thank you for investing in me.
digging in and finding root
over the past couple of months, i’ve continued to step up, dig in, and do it.
i got tired quick.
as many of you recognize, i’ve always been on the go, 1000MPH.
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at 28, though, i realized that it’s okay not to be.
it’s okay to recognize the need for rest.
to cut off.
to disconnect.
mine and nick’s relationship was birthed with annual international trips across the world and various other domestic trips sprinkled in.
we told ourselves we’d rather invest in experiences than material things.
with the hustle and bustle of both of our work lives (yes- I just compartmentalized, though I’m not a huge fan of this because I LOVE what I do), 28 became the season with none of that for the two of us.
you see, during year 27, i invested all of my energy into anything and everything beyond our relationship.
leaving me at 28 with no time or energy to invest into travel with him.
so, to ring in 29, nick and i took our first shared trip in over a year and a half. 
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we used our miles and points to go see a place we’d never seen and do things we’d never done.
beyond the real reason why houston was our destination of choice (our spitball landed there on a map), is the fact that i was reminded by re-reading our vows that life was passing by too quickly…
“…i choose you. to travel to the ends of this earth and smile so wide it hurts with. to challenge, support, inspire and cherish…to share every moment of this life with; for together and now we are richer and we are healthy, but if one day that changes, i’d still choose you to do it with.”
this trip offered a new opportunity to pause + reflect.
27 represented me not choosing nick.
28 meant choosing God first, then nick. 
and, just as God’s timing works,
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29 will be rooted in God first, nick second...and when time and motivation allows, connecting with people to LOVEbigger, third...and probably some other cool stuff :)
ROI
on our flight home, i recognized that the love i give to others can, in no way, be expected in return. not because the people i love can’t love back, but because the WAY they love is not the same way that i love.
i think this observation of my feelings stems from the growth i’ve had over the past year…it became apparent in discerning who called, texted, posted and sent cards for my birthday- my initial reaction was that HOW you celebrated with me also meant this was HOW MUCH you loved me.
i know that’s not true though, because i know that LOTS of you love me!
you have lives and celebrations (praise God!) and struggles you deal with too.
the love you have for me is not limited because you forgot to share and celebrate with me. i've realized that it’s simply a matter of me not being high-enough on the priority list for you…and the good news is, that’s okay!
…because i am God’s priority...and so are you.
and now, at 29, this confidence in God overflows enough to love without boundaries and not expect anything in return…
it took 28 years to get it, but thank God i did!
...and i hope you have and/or will one day too.
thanks to those of you who’ve taught me how. <3
so- here’s to twenty-nine...and 29 pieces to a new vision and mission for my life...
...because the ROI isn’t the return i gain for my investment, but the return He gains.
my manifesto for year 29
1)      LOVE the LORD your God with all of your heart, mind, soul and strength…and always LOVE what you love without boundaries or limitations…because there is a reason you LOVE what you LOVE so much.
2)      dreamBIG. the dreams for developing your life have always been big. they’ve also always been possible. don’t stop dreaming…and don’t stop chasing them. dig in and dream on!
3)      LOVEbigger…than your doubts, fears and feelings…and the return on investment.
4)      “WHATEVER you do (if it’s work, play, relaxing, leading or loving), do it with ALL your heart, as though you are doing it for the Lord, not men.” –Colossians 3:23
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5)      set & stick to boundaries so you can do everything you choose to do with ALL of you. don’t fall in the gray zone. stay focused.
6)      …but identify which kinds of bright shiny objects (or distractions) set your soul on fire. for these “squirrels,” let your mind and heart wander because it is these bright shiny objects that could be your real calling.
7)      because of your faith, be the David against Goliath…remember that all things are possible.
8)      SMILE and say YAY a lot. it brings YOU joy, and sometimes it also brings others the same joy. for those whom it doesn’t work for, love them through it and keep saying YAY!
9)      be graceful with your words, actions and reactions. you’ve come a long way in this arena- no need to stop now!
10)    rest. it’s okay. :)  
Matthew 11:28 "come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest.”
11)    if you want it, ask for it. if not, don’t settle.
12)    remember, one foot before the other. baby steps lead to balance.
13)    it starts with love and ends with self-control.
14)    read. it makes you learn and connect with people in a way that you can’t, otherwise.
15)  write. this, too, is a platform for you to connect with people who you may not otherwise connect with.
16)  be courageous.
17)  pause before you speak and act.
18)  be observant. notice when there are opportunities to LOVEbigger...and if they aren’t apparent, create them.
19)   remember that you are undefined...but also that you live with a disease that, if uncontrolled, could kill you. don’t take your sweet life for granted.
20)   hug people. you know that people up north don’t necessarily like it. do it anyway- science shows it releases endorphins :)
21)  dance like nobody’s watching. and if they are, invite them to join.
22)   life’s too short to be too serious. laugh lots.
23)   lead by example. practice what you preach. <3
24)   get in the saltwater at least once a week. it enlightens your spirit and reminds you of blessings.
25)   “give a man a fish and you feed him for a day. teach a man to fish and you feed him for a lifetime.” <-- remember this when you lead others. teach them how.
26)   never give up hope in anything.
27)   whenever you have doubts, be reminded that miracles exist. you are proof.
28)   be ALL you. it’s beautiful.
29)   stand firm + shine on.
+1 to grow on...
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30) eat cake.
also:
please note that the promise of 29 includes some good news, still in development... but i can feel it in my bones + i’m trusting the BIG MAN on this one!
the changes in the pipeline are pretty radical.
so stoked to share in them with all of you!!!
...to each of you- thank you for being a part of my journey. <3
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zongear-blog · 7 years
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Iam talking about your thoughts ..... #listentothelight #nothingusasitseems #tothinkistocreate #mindfullness is how you get there. #beclear #committed #lovebigger #loveharder #norewardsforquiters #bcfu
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✨Decisions....decisions...decisions! I'll take them all! Flowers anyone?✨ #saturdaymorning #runningerrands #flowers #market #todolist #sunshine #happy #happygirl #love #riseandshine #dreamincolor #friends #gifts #flowerlove #makesmehappy #dreambig #lovebigger 🐝❤️ (at Hudson River Waterfront Walkway)
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katrina-is-a-mom · 5 years
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New Perspective
Sometimes you need a new perspective. A new angle. A different lens. But does that really help or just blur the things you don’t want to see anymore? Can we really look at something we’ve already seen in a new light?
 I’d like to think the answer is yes. Taking a look back on something after having new experiences added to your life files can change your view. Maybe you will feel something new. Maybe you feel the same things but have a different reaction. Maybe you won’t feel anything at all anymore.
 Having a new perspective can be empowering, reassuring, and scary. Seeing something in a new light might bring a shock to your system (but in a good way!). My outlook and awareness definitely has changed over time. I am different person, but in a great way. A way I am proud of.  I believe even stronger in things. I have opinions on issues I never thought about before. I have stronger emotional connections to ideas, thoughts, and beliefs. I look forward to a new day every day with the possibility of  an even newer perspective.
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virgoluvchild · 7 years
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Remain steadfast. Keep your eyes on the prize, no matter what's going on! #BeStrong #AcheieveYourGoals #Dreambig #LoveBigger #WorkHard #FeedYourSpirit #StrengthenYourMind and #ServeOthers . The world can crumble down around me but I WON'T BE MOVED.
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