Tumgik
#look man if you get it you get it idk what else to say
aperrywilliams · 2 days
Text
It Was Horrible Until It Wasn't (Spencer Reid x Fem!Reader)
Tumblr media
------------------ 
Author Masterlist
------------------
Pairing: Spencer Reid x Fem!Reader.
Summary: Reader comes up to her apartment after Spencer walks her home from the diner, where they spend the last couple of hours. She is still processing the night and wonders if they will meet again. Another fortuitous event makes that happen. In which terms they will part ways again?
Word Count: 5.1k
Warnings: Mention of guns (tests to carry a gun). Mention to Reader's ex. Some strong words? IDK what else. If I forgot something, let me know.
A/N: I got very excited after your reactions and comments to "If Anything, I Find it Educative." So this is kind of part two, from Reader's perspective. I'm not convinced about a series yet, even if I have some ideas. What would you like to see if it happens?
-----
Reader's POV
-----
As I open the door, a bunch of cardboard boxes scattered on the floor greets me. That reminds me that I haven't unpacked all my things yet.
I've only been living here for two weeks, and I'm still getting used to the idea that this is my new home. 
It doesn't feel like it yet. 
But the boxes will be a problem for tomorrow. Now, I only want to take off these high heels and this fancy dress and call it a night - a pretty eventful night.
Not only did I have to confront my ex with his new girlfriend, but I also had to pretend I was okay with it. But how did I expect to do that? Did I genuinely think two months would be enough to be outside again to prove I got myself up? 
How naive of me.
I make a beeline to my bedroom, not even bothering to look at the rest of the apartment.
Again, it's tomorrow's problem.
Retreating my phone from my purse, I plug it to charge over my bedside table as I strip from my clothes and go to the bathroom to do my nightly routine.
The entire time, my mind doesn't stop wandering. At some point, it settles on the girl I helped from choking. It was a total coincidence for me to be there. I only approached the bar for another drink when I heard that man rambling. I don't know why my ear perked up, but it did. When I look to find the voice's source, my eyes land on the man and the girl by his side.
He was talking as if the world would end if he didn't, and the girl only eyed him from head to toe, clearly not giving a damn what he was saying. I kept subtly listening to them while sipping my drink. The guy's voice had something enchanting. I would have heard him talk for hours if it were from me. It was a bad thing his interlocutor wasn't so receptive, and when she occasionally said something, it was a flirting remark that only made him uncomfortable. 
What a shame.
When I noticed her fighting to breathe, swatting her hands in desperation, and the poor guy froze on the spot, I knew I needed to do something.
I didn't think much of it and wrapped my arms around her torso to help her. It worked. The oyster she choked with flew into the air, and she could breathe again.
But the next thing I knew, her palm connected to the man's cheek.
The poor guy seemed so confused, and the people talking around didn't help either. What a shitty situation. And as the good citizen I am, I tried to do something about it, only to get lashed out by the same woman I just saved from choking.
Fuck it. 
Seeing the people's attention returned to them, I walked away. That wasn't my fight in the first place.
Returning from the bathroom, I hear my phone ding. It's a text from my friend Andie.
Andie: How did the gala turn out? Did you see him? He was with her, right?
Andie had insisted on me not going to the gala, although I repeated to her several times that it was okay, that nothing would happen, and that I couldn't hide forever.
Me: You were right. I wasn't ready.
It's a defeat I must recognize. I wasn't prepared to see them.
Andie: My girl, I'm so sorry. It must have been awful for you.
It was, but it doesn't mean the night was a disaster.
Me: It was horrible until it wasn't. I can tell you more tomorrow. Now, I only want to go to bed.
Andie: You have me a bit confused here, but okay. I'll call you tomorrow. Sleep tight; I love you.
I return my phone to the charger and slip under the covers.
It was horrible until it wasn't.
I keep thinking about that. And a smile tugs the corner of my lips. Since Spencer - the guy who got slapped by the oyster-choked girl - approached me at the terrace, the night wasn't that awful anymore.
Who would have thought I would end my night in a diner, dressed to the nines and spouting details of my messy life to a stranger?
-
Monday morning comes faster than I wanted. 
I spent my Sunday mostly unpacking boxes and tidying my apartment, and now, with a coffee in hand, I cross the hall to my office on the third floor of the FBI building in Quantico.
Some colleagues greet me as I pass by. I return them with a polite smile. I saw a couple of them at the gala on Saturday. I only hope they didn't notice the wreck I was that night.
On my desk, a pile of hundreds of manila folders are waiting for me.
This Monday will be a blast.
Dutifully, I reach for the first folder to start my work, as my ear perks up to two colleagues' conversation about the gala.
"Did you see them? Those hot chicks from Counterterrorism?" a male colleague says to another.
"Yeah. I heard one of them was hitting on Reid from the BAU. What a waste!" The other adds.
"And the lucky bastard wasn't able to take her home. His nerdy charm didn't even help him with that."
The mention of the BAU brings Spencer to my mind again. And I realize I don't even know his last name. 
I don't think I need to know, but I can't stop my fingers from typing 'Spencer FBI BAU' on my computer.
My findings make the conversation between my colleagues intriguing. They were precisely talking about Spencer, Spencer Reid, and the girl with him at the gala. Clearly, the incident did not go unnoticed.
I don't like the tone they refer to him, either. I do not know the guy well, but I'm sure he's way better than any of the men at the venue that night.
Are you hearing yourself (Y/N)? That kind of blind trust put you in this situation with your ex in the first place.
I shouldn't grant credibility so fast, but honestly? Spencer seems to be everything but a threat. The things he said, the way he spoke. Anyway, I should stop thinking about that if I want to finish some work. Yeah, that's what I need to do.
Drowning out the noise, I return to the opened folder and continue working.
Some would ask how a task as monotonous as the one I'm doing now could be appealing to someone. The appeal for me comes from how everything fits in the right places and serves a purpose. That's enough for me, even if some people don't understand it.
My ex didn't. And as him, many others.
I'm still fighting to ease the effects their judgments had on me.
Around lunchtime, stopping the papers review, I pick up my phone to check my messages. Yesterday, I promised Andie I would have lunch with her today, so I'm checking for her confirmation and a place to meet.
Just in time, a text comes. She is free right now and suggests a restaurant just outside the building.
"Hey, girl! I'm glad you made it," she greets me as I spot her on one of the tables.
"Of course. I promised I would."
Lunchtime is only one hour, so we order quickly and go straight to the matter.
"I can't believe the son of the bitch decided to go and show off his new conquest," Andie huffs.
"Not that new, considering she has been sleeping with him in what used to be my bed at least a month before I discovered it," I correct with an annoyed look.
It's good to say these things without crying my eyes out anymore.
I tell Andie more details about how it went to share a space packed with mutuals around us and try to stay composed.
"But at some point, I just couldn't. So I retracted to the bar. I only wanted to grab a drink and be alone."
Andie nods in understanding.
"I don't blame you. So you were at the bar when you crossed to the girl to whom you did Heimlich?"
Yesterday, by phone, I told Andie the main facts regarding that, and after laughing for a solid five minutes about the whole ordeal, she made me promise to reveal more details in our lunch meeting.
That's why I'm describing what happened piece by piece.
"She slapped the guy? And she yelled at you? What a bitch! But I don't understand why he apologized on her behalf."
"Honestly? I didn't understand it, but it made sense after talking with him. The guy felt responsible, even if it wasn't related to him. It was the fact that someone had to do the right thing," I explain, with my eyes fixed on my water glass, recalling Spencer's words from that night. 
I can't help but feel some fondness for his genuine worry. Andie raises an eyebrow and hums.
"The guy made a good impression on you, I see."
Andie's tone is teasing, and I know exactly where she is heading.
"Come on, don't start with that," I warn her. I'm not thoroughly annoyed, but I'm not in the mood for teasing. Andie scoffs.
"I'm just saying it's good to know there are men out there that give hopes up. That's all!"
"Sure," I mumble, not very convinced by her explanation.
The rest of our lunch follows a similar tone. When I finish telling Andie about Spencer walking me home, I know she is biting her tongue to say something to taunt me, but she holds back and opts for a question.
"Do you think you'll see him again?"
I ponder my answer. I don't know, although I remember Spencer asking, 'See you around?'
That doesn't mean we agreed to see each other again, even if I said, 'Sure, why not?' 
Did Spencer mean that? Did he want to see me again?
"I don't know. Maybe. We both work in this building, so there are chances, I guess," I shrug. Andie narrows her eyes.
"But do you want to?"
That's a question I don't know how to answer, so I take some seconds to think about it.
"Let's say I'm not opposed to the idea."
A reply that could be an understatement. But not I'm telling Andie that.
She doesn't press on the matter, though. And I'm grateful she doesn't.
Now it's time to go back to work. We walk out of the restaurant to our building and separate ways at the elevator. Andie continues to the eighth floor when I hop off on the third.
Returning to my desk, I continue checking the folders piled on my desk, and my mind only focuses on that, knowing if I don't, there is no chance of getting this stack finished.
----
A good thing about the week progressing is nobody talking anymore about the damn gala. It's been a nightmare since Monday when everyone had to mention something about it. That included comments about me facing my ex there. 
Of course, it was public knowledge I was dating an agent of the Criminal Investigative Division. Also, it became public knowledge he cheated on me with his current girlfriend from Counterterrorism.
But finally, it is Thursday, and everything seems to have returned to normal, so much so that the amount of work has increased exponentially. That's why I'm still at the office at seven pm.
I only assume it's time to go home when my boss pokes out of his office and calls for Andrew, one of our coworkers who distributes files and memos to the other departments.
I turn around, and it's only me at this hour. My boss notices the vacant office and is now talking to me.
"I guess I have to ask you to do this. Can you go to the sixth and drop this to Aaron Hotchner's office? I would have waited until tomorrow for Andrew, but this must be at his desk today."
I don't think I have a choice, so I pick the folder, promising to drop it before going home.
With my coat and purse, I grab the folder and stroll to the elevator.
I have been working here for four years and know every financial detail of each Quantico department, but I still need to recognize all department locations in this facility. So, floors are just floors, except the eight where Andie works.
Arriving at my destination, I walk into a bullpen, where I can see a lot of desks and offices. And just like my floor, it is almost empty. Anyway, I see one of the offices with lights on. My instinct tells me that's the place I'm looking for, and the plaque at the door confirms my suspicions: SSA Aaron Hotchner.
"Come in," a voice comes from the office when I knock.
Peeking inside, a stern-looking man is glancing in my direction. "Can I help you?" he asks with a slight frown.
"Yes, sir. I'm with the Finance Division, and my boss asked me to bring this to you," I explain as I reach out to hand him the folder. When he grabs it, realization washes over the man.
"Of course. Thank you very much-" Agent Hotchner trails off.
"(Y/L/N)," I supply, knowing he wants my last name.
"Thank you very much, Agent (Y/L/N)."
Weird. 
Everyone in the finance and administrative department refers to each other only by last name. We use the 'agent' thing mainly with those who do the fieldwork, and we are used to that.
"You're welcome, Agent Hotchner," I smile politely, ready to leave the man's office. He nods approvingly.
"Hotch, sorry for interrupting you, but I'm ready with my report. I thought you wanted it-"
A man talks, entering abruptly at the office. He stops in his tracks when he sees Agent Hotchner isn't alone.
"Oh, I'm sorry. I didn't know you were with someone. I can come back later," he apologizes.
Wait. I know that voice. 
I turn, and I see Spencer standing there. His eyes meet mine, and I feel my cheeks burn. He doesn't say anything but doesn't tear his eyes from mine.
I don't know how many seconds pass, but it's enough for Agent Hotchner to intervene.
"Reid?" he calls Spencer's attention.
"Uh?"
"The report. It's okay; you can give it to me," he tells Spencer, not without subtly bouncing his gaze between us.
"Oh. Okay." Spencer approaches Hotchner's desk, but he still directs glances at me. I want to say hi to him properly, but it doesn't feel okay knowing the man in front of us is undoubtedly his boss. I don't want him to feel uncomfortable. So, I take that as my cue to leave.
"If you excuse me," I tell Agent Hotchner, signaling my departure. Spencer looks at me, and I give him a subtle smile.
"Of course. Thank you again, Agent (Y/L/N)."
"To you, sir. Have a good evening."
I walk down the stairs to the open bullpen and toward the elevator.
Before I can push the go-down button, a voice calls my name. It's Spencer's.
"(Y/N), wait!"
I turn and see him trotting towards me.
"Hi!" he says once we are face to face.
Now I feel bad. Spencer comes here to say hi, and I didn't greet him properly just two minutes ago. 
"Spencer, hi. I'm sorry, I should have said something there, but I didn't know if you wanted him to know- I mean, I supposed he was your boss, and I-"
What's wrong with me? 
Why can't I explain myself without stumbling with my words?
"No. No. Don't apologize. It's okay. I should have told you something, too. But I didn't expect to see you here."
"Me neither. My boss sent me here instead of one of my coworkers, who left early. I didn't know this was the BAU floor. What a coincidence, uh?" I play cool, shifting my weight from one foot to another. Spencer nods in agreement.
"Totally. It's good to see you, though. I hoped we could cross paths again."
Isn't it weird that his words have produced a funny tingle in my stomach right now?
"Is that so?" I half-breath, noticing his cheeks turn a shade of pink.
"Yes. I mean, I truly enjoyed talking to you that night," he sheepishly admits.
I more than enjoyed it, Spencer.
"Yeah, me too."
Silence sets between us. And it's time to make a decision. I could say I go home and leave him with a lukewarm 'See you around,' or say I'm leaving, but before doing so, give Spencer my number so we can talk soon. Or...
"Are you busy right now? I'm heading home now, but if you can and want, we can go for a coffee."
Wow (Y/N). Very smooth. I like you smooth.
Spencer's eyes widened, and I wondered for a second if my offer was too straightforward.
"If you have plans, it's okay. We don't have to," I relent.
"Oh, no. I don't. And I would love to go for a coffee with you," Spencer hastens to say. I release a breath I didn't know I was holding.
"Yeah?"
"Sure! If you wait for me just a second, I'll pick my things from my desk, and we can go."
----
This time, it's my turn to pick the place.
It's a small coffee shop in the middle of Virginia, just mid-way between Quantico and my apartment.
As we get on the train, I ask Spencer about Agent Hotchner.
"Hotch? Well, he has been at the unit for twelve years now. Gideon, a former agent, told me once he didn't expect Hotch to last long in the BAU. But he proved him wrong. Indeed, Gideon left, and Hotch stayed. Honestly, I can't picture the BAU with another unit chief."
There is a fondness when Spencer talks about Hotchner. I can tell he sees him more than as a superior.
"What about yours?"
Now is my turn to talk about my boss.
"Agent Williams? He is a bureaucrat from head to toe. He had just transferred from another administrative department when I joined the financial division four years ago. At that time, he had ten years working with the FBI. The guy is a genius but lacks social skills. I'm not judging him; I'm a bit like him. But in his position, he needs to make politics, which involves talking and convincing people."
The conversation with Spencer flows so well and easily that I'm as impressed as I was the night of the gala. 
When we reach the coffee shop, we sit facing each other. After ordering our coffee, we start talking about our coworkers.
"So Garcia is our technical analyst. I have to say she is like the team's heart. Besides her outstanding skills, her compassion and care are something out of this world," Spencer admits, and again, I feel the fondness in his voice.
"She seems very special," I add. Spencer nods.
"Very. I don't know what it's like to have a sister, but if I had one, I would have liked someone like her.
So he doesn't have a sister. Does he have brothers, though? We have yet to talk about our families, so this is the first piece of information I get about it.
"What about the guy who came to check what was happening with your girl at the gala?" I ask, and Spencer scoff.
"First of all, Ashley isn't my girl. I think she made it pretty clear that night. And secondly, the guy in question is Morgan, the culprit of why I was with Ashley in the first place."
That's interesting. I want to know more about that.
"How is that?" I ask, sipping my coffee.
Spencer tells me how Morgan insisted they talk to the girls - Ashley and her friends - and how he reluctantly followed him.
I'm about to make a not-so-kind remark when Spencer gets ahead of me.
"I know it may seem like he is a thoughtless person, but he truly means well. I can't entirely agree with his tactics most of the time, but he's right when he tells me I should enjoy more and work less."
"It's safe to say you weren't 'enjoying' that much there," I quip, air-quoting the word 'enjoying.' Spencer chuckles.
"Yeah. Honestly? I have more fun when Morgan kicks doors down in our field chases than when he tries to play wingman for me."
What? Kick doors down?
"Wait a minute. Are you telling me that the FBI had to spend thousands of dollars in repairs for third parties last year because of him?"
I know I'm being dramatic. It's impossible that just one agent destroyed that amount of dollars by kicking doors. But still.
Spencer's eyes widen.
"What? No! I mean, yes. He does that, but thousands of dollars? Last time I checked, doors are not that expensive."
I roll my eyes. That's not the point.
"Okay. I know it's not only Agent Morgan's doing, but did you know the buro's budget had increased by 4% last year due to refunds for field operations? And did you know 70% of that increase refers to agents shattering private property?"
Now, I sound like my boss. Great. I became what I swore to destroy.
Spencer looks at me with amusement. I narrow my eyes to him. "What?"
He clears his throat. "Oh. No, nothing. It's just - well, it's fascinating to hear you talking about - uh - numbers."
I can't help but snort. "Come on, how fascinating that can be?"
Spencer grins. "If anything, I find it educative," he parrots my words from that night, and we fall into a fit of laughs.
"Yeah?" I muse after the laughter subsides. Spencer nods, still a smile gracing his face.
Gosh, that smile.
"Well, I can talk about numbers all day. But I'm sure you don't want me to 'fascinate' you that much."
Spencer hums, faking be pondering his options.
"Don't tempt me. I like to know and talk about everything. But before returning to numbers, I want to ask about your coworkers. I already talked much about mine."
Even if there is not much to say, indulging him with an answer is only fair.
"What can I say? In my area, there are three: Anthony, Leah, and me. We were four then, but Andie was promoted to the eighth floor a year ago. Anthony is a good guy, a little inexperienced, but very eager to learn. We don't have a very close relationship, but he's my protegee at work. Leah is very clever and has enough experience, but sometimes she is not present, making things a little tense between us. Andie is rightfully my friend. We got to the bureau simultaneously, and although she doesn't work with us anymore, we are very close."
Spencer is looking at me with full attention. It's odd to talk about this kind of thing with someone. I don't like to talk about my bonds in general. It makes me feel vulnerable. But for a reason that I still don't get, with Spencer, it feels right.
It's night already, and we are in our third coffee.
"Do you usually drink this amount of coffee daily at this hour? I try to cut off my dosis after lunch, but sometimes I just can't," I point as I stir the spoon on my coffee. Spencer hums.
"I drink a lot of it at any time of the day, every day. It's worse when we are on cases because that shitty coffee at the precincts should not even be called coffee," he scoffs, pouring half of the sugar pot into his cup.
I have already noticed the amount of sugar Spencer has used in his two previous coffees; this third is not the exception.
"I'm sorry, but I have to ask," I say as my eyes dart to his sweet liquid. He follows my line of sight and chuckles.
"I love coffee, but I don't like its bitterness. I know it doesn't make sense, but for me it does."
"Fair enough."
After that, our conversation stumbles to lousy sleep habits.
"Ray hated it. Even once, he told me I purposely got up in the middle of the night to annoy him."
Spencer's brow furrows.
"Ray is your ex?"
Shit. I don't realize I'm talking about him.
Why do I have to mention him? I hate how ingrained he is still in my life.
"Yeah, Raymond. No wonder why things didn't work out between us," I try to joke because I don't want to cry about it anymore.
"An example of a man," Spencer follows my lead, and I'm grateful he doesn't look at me like people usually do when I talk about it. There is no pity. There is no that look saying, 'Oh, poor girl who got cheated on.' It's like a whole understanding. It doesn't make me feel like a failure. And that's a change—a good one.
I chuckle. "Hell, he is."
It's getting late, and it's time to part ways, even if I don't want it. Hours pass quickly with such good company.
"We should get going. It's late," I point as I glance at my phone. Spencer nods in acknowledgment, signaling the waitress to get the check. He is about to fish his wallet when I stop him.
"No. Don't do that. I invited you."
Spencer scoffs, opening his wallet nonetheless. 
"No way. You invited me the other night. You can do it next time."
Next time, uh? I want to say something teasing, but the waitress returns with our check.
We are outside the coffee shop now. I adjust my coat as Spencer does the same with his suit jacket. The night is chilly, and the contrast with the warmth of the coffee shop is evident.
"Can I walk you home?" He offers. I have my doubts about that. It's not that I don't like the idea; I just don't want to use more of his time.
"You don't have to. Really," I shake my head.
"Please? You already said it. It's pretty late," he insists, looking at me with dog puppy eyes. 
Why is he doing that? He is testing my resolve.
"You know I can take care of myself, right? I'm a certificated FBI agent. I can't carry a gun, but sure I could manage," I argue in a teasing tone. Spencer chuckles.
"I know you are. And I'm sure you could. Even though, why no to prolong our evening for fifteen minutes long?" I raise an eyebrow.
"So you really like my company, uh?" 
I'm sure I see a blush creeping his cheeks, and it's endearing.
"I like your company. I thought I made it pretty clear the other night?" he probes. And I don't know how to respond to that.
The truth is quite curious. Teasing Spencer seems so natural sometimes, but now I don't know what to say.
I decide not to say anything and nod, motioning for us to start walking.
Spencer follows me, and we walk in silence for the first block. Then, I feel the need to continue our conversation. I want these fifteen minutes to be as good as the previous two hours.
"Did you know that I used to carry a gun? Although it took me three failed tests to do so."
Spencer looks at me, surprised. I take that as my cue to tell that story.
Once I tell him how I finally managed to pass my shooting test, he starts telling me how he also failed his test a couple of times.
"So you saved your boss life shooting an unsub?" Spencer nods.
"But I really aimed to his leg, not his head," he adds, and we burst into a fit of laughter.
Without realizing it, we are already in front of my building. The laughter subsides when we notice where we are.
I clear my throat. "Well. Uh-thank you. Again," I say, referring to him walking me home.
"No need," Spencer says. "I had a good time today," he adds, smiling. 
I can't help but feel my cheeks burn. Spencer casts his eyes to the ground.
"Me too," I admit, biting my bottom lip. "I - uh."
Why am I so nervous right now? Just say what you want to say!
"I - uh. I'd really like to do this again. I mean, you know, maybe next time could be something planned?"
Spencer's eyes flick to mine. I would say he didn't expect me to say that.
"I would love that," he says, keeping eye contact. And for a moment, I think the breath leaves my lungs. Those eyes are something I didn't see in my life before. I can't describe it, but it's enough to make me speechless.
"I guess it's here when I ask for your number?" Spencer's voice is the one that brings me out of the trance.
I chuckle, mid-embarrassed by my absorption moment. I gesture for him to give me the phone. Spencer does it, and I advert his piercing gaze to focus on typing my number. Once done, I return the device with a playful smile. Jeez, I feel like a damn teenager.
A snort leaves Spencer's lips when he sees the name I used for my contact.
"Really?" He asks. I nod, chuckling.
"It's safe to say you won't forget who I am," I confirm.
"Bet I won't."
"Good. Now I'm going to come up," I gesture to the building. "Good night, Spencer."
"Good night, (Y/N)."
I turn to enter the building, and although I can't see him, I feel him standing there in the cold night until I disappear into the elevator.
Once I cross the threshold of my apartment, a ding comes from my phone. Frowning, I pick it up.
Unknown number: Are you free on Saturday at midday? We could go to lunch. Let me know. Good night. SR.
I bit my lower lip. And after typing a reply, I start my night routine before bed.
Oh, boy. What are you getting into (Y/N)? 
Whatever it is, it feels so good.
-------------
A/N 2: As always, I'm excited to know your thoughts about this one!
-------------
Spencer Reid's Taglist: @dreatine @nomajdetective @jayyeahthatsme @rosalinasam2 @averyhotchner @lovelyxtom @princessmiaelicia @pastelbabygirl19 @reidsbookclub @alexxavicry @gspenc @spencerreidisbae123 @calmspencer @pauline5525mgg @anamiad00msday @milivanili99 @laylasbunbunny @leahblackk @miaxx03 @missabsey @taintedstranger @khxna @hiireadstuff @pleasantwitchgarden @dysphoricsanity @levi-of-starz @themoonchildwhofell @silver138 @lovelybaka @shinytinywhispers
151 notes · View notes
grandlinedreams · 6 hours
Text
|| hey remember that thing I said abt boot riding and condescending, mean Coop :)
|| notes: unestablished timeline, could be seen as pre or post s1, reader can be whatever they want, waves hand something something idk man I've got it so bad for this guy also HEY. MDNI. BIG TIME. YOU'VE BEEN WARNED.
|| warnings: pretty much pwp, oral (m receiving), cum eating/swallowing, cursing, boot riding, Cooper is mean, hair pulling, afab reader i guess
Tumblr media
Cooper isn't sure if it's the oppressive heat, the lack of decent drinking water or food that isn't roasted radroach to blame for your attitude, or if it's something else entirely ㅡ but you've found his last nerve over the last couple hours and are determined to rip it to shreds.
Part of him says he could save himself some long term trouble and put a bullet in your head, but he won't for two reasons. One, that's a waste of ammo. And two, he likes having you around.
You're a good companion, when you aren't in such a piss-poor mood. But it's that mood that's the current issue ㅡ and so, Cooper comes up with his own solution when you get just a little too mouthy for his liking.
"Come on now sweetheart," he grunts, voice low as he watches you, "you can take it, can't you?"
Your answer is garbled for the length currently occupying your mouth, tip of him pushed far enough that it threatens to gag you. Cooper doesn't think he's seen anything prettier than the tears in your eyes over his cock in your mouth.
He groans when you swallow around him, fists a hand tight into your hair to guide you ㅡ and the way you squirm also catches his attention. But one thing at a time, and he isn't about to give you whatever it is you think you deserve until after he's done.
He tells you so, eyes glinting as you whine around him, sound silenced by the rough jerk of his hips. "Come on, sweet thing," he coos, mocking as he cups your chin, thumbs at the bead of drool that slides from the corner of your mouth, "not gettin' shit if you can't behave."
This isn't the first time he's been in your mouth, nor will it be the last ㅡ but the pitiful look on your face only furthers his pleasure as he bucks, listens as you choke and gag around him.
His head tips back as you suck, fist tightening in your hair as you slide your tongue over the underside of him, the steady pulse as his breath hitches a little. "Fuck," he huffs, "see? Told you I'd find somethin' for you to do with that mouth of yours other than bitch."
You squirm again, thighs rubbing together to try and give yourself a little friction as his already rough rhythm turns choppier ㅡ and then he's spilling down your throat with a low groan that only adds to your own arousal.
Cooper pulls free of your mouth and watches as you swallow before he tucks himself away and snorts when you give him an expectant look. "What's that for, sugar? Never promised I was gonna help you out."
Your lips part like you want to protest, but he's right ㅡ he'd never said he was going to do anything afterwards. He smirks, makes a show of debating before he crouches in front of you, tips your chin up so he can meet your eyes.
"Poor thing, did suckin' me off get you that hot and bothered?" Your cheeks flush, and his amusement grows. "I guess I can help you out. But we're doing this my way, hm?" You blink, watching as he moves to settle a little ways away, then gestures. "Well? C'mere, babydoll."
Cooper watches you, tracking you as you settle over him in his lap. He reaches for you, pulls you flush to him before he cups your face with gloved hands. "You wanna get off so bad, you'll take whatever I give you, hm?"
Your cheeks burn, betraying you as you nod and listen to him click his tongue, sizing you up before he leans to kiss you. It'd almost be sweet were it not for the way he anchors you to keep you from withdrawing, muffling your soft noises before pulling away.
"Alright, sweetheart," he breathes, "I'll give you somethin'."
"Come on sweetheart, I thought you wanted this."
Your cheeks blaze, a mix of embarrassment and arousal as your hips rock, bitten off whine that makes Cooper snicker as he watches you rut against his boot. The dusty leather is far from what you'd been expecting, but Cooper had been adamant ㅡ either you got off on his boot or you didn't get off at all.
He at least pushes it against you, offers that modicum of reciprocation beyond the dark, hungry way he watches you grind against the only thing he's willing to offer.
The edge of it digs against the ache of your core, makes you groan and grind down harder.
"Look at you, honeybunch," Cooper drawls, determined to keep up a steady stream of commentary and make this all the worse for you, "that needy for me you're willing to hump my boot like a bitch in heat. Pathetic."
It should annoy you, but all the insult does is send heat curling in your veins to join the needy, sticky slick between your legs as you whimper and continue moving. Your thighs ache, your head spins with the way you're panting ㅡ but you're so close.
Cooper knows it to, doesn't miss a beat as he listens to you whimper, noises arching to something more pitched before you're shuddering, rocking your hips in rough, tiny little movements before you're panting, body trembling with the force of your orgasm.
"See, sugar? Wasn't so hard, was it?" His tone and words are a playful taunt, one that has you glaring at him.
"Fuck you."
Cooper grins, eyes dark. "That's the plan, babydoll."
48 notes · View notes
Note
Really enjoyed your review of spoiler alert and you were so right about everything, and I wanted to say I've read a handful of books where fandom plays a significant role and each time it's treated as something taboo and unspeakable while also being embroiled in early 2000s social media/fandom sites while simultaneously having traits of modern fandom? Which is so interesting because it makes me wonder how much the authors are drawing off of experiences from when they were younger and how involved they are today to be both so aware of trends and so out of touch. And every time it's had some kind of "coming out" vibe attached to it so it's not just this book that did it. Which i guess what else can you do if you want your protagonist to have some dark secret that isn't actually that big of a deal AND you want to rehash fandom opinions
man books that are "fandom themed" for lack of a better description have been on the rise for a minute now. it started in YA (I think Rainbow Rowell's Fangirl was patient zero in 2013, but it was definitely picking up steam by 2017; I remember books like Kathryn Ormsbee's Tash Hearts Tolstoy and Jen Wilde's Queens of Geek were getting recced everywhere I looked) but it's also really hit romance in a huge way.
I've by and large avoided fandom-heavy books because they unfortunately almost all seem (and I do not say this lightly) kind of. unbearably cringe in terms if how they handle fandom, especially with the bizarro cloak and dagger attitude you mentioned. idk maybe if someone writes me a hot romance between two housewives who fall in love sending furtive gay star trek smut back and forth or something I can get on board with it, but for the most part being a fan of things just is not that interesting of a premise. TO ME.
36 notes · View notes
Note
Hiiii bonten Rindou hc???? Pleaseee. Love him frr
To be honest, I intended for this to be almost exclusively for haikyuu… BUT FOR YOU MY FRIEND! *pounds chest* I SHALL GIVE YOU THE RINNY OF YOUR DREAMS. Also you didn’t specify what kind you want so ima give you my finest shit, which happens to be my head cannon prowess. (Totally not because I hate writing dialogue, no,no, that’s so stupid 😳) Also important side note: I aint spend days finishing the Tok rev manga not to use it tf outta here. Tokrev and Jjk content is welcomed proudly.
idk if I’ll make a part 2, but on the off chance I do, look foreword to girldad Rinny content.
status: unedited
warnings: cursing, slightly sexual situations (but no smut), mafia bs, blood? Fluffy bullshit, Rindou being a dick hole, the ick, my bad Spanish
💜Bonten Rindou Hataini. Headcannons~💜
Tumblr media
The first thing off the bat, I definitely think he is on the demisexual spectrum. I know everyone else be saying that he would be all about just sleeping around like that, but to be honest, I think that that’s more of a Ran thing. I feel like the only reason he would go to strip clubs and shit like that for work, and would actually be really grossed out when people would coddle him. If he was to have a significant other, it would have to be someone he has known for a long time, or from his old delinquent days. My best idea would be a calm friend who would give him the notes from his skipped classes. And in return he’d take them out for food or some shit. Somewhere along the way y’all would just be like, “we’re totally together right?” “Duh, why else would I put up with you.” Yeah he a lil bitch.
Any way, as for him as an adult, all I gotta say is “Mmmm Papí ¿quieres una besito?~”. Like Jesus Christ man has no right being this freaking fine. Sexy Jellyfish ass boy
Yakuza Daddy🥵. This man will spoil the everlasting shit outta you, and go to Walmart for his own shit. But had does it in the most obnoxious way possible. He gets you a necklace? “Hey babe, gotchu this, your old one was musty af, take better care of your shit.” Awww you want a new dress? “Sure babe, but just know that thing barely covers shit, and will be gone by the end of the night.” You want something just random? “Wtf am I a walking ATM? No, pick it tf up, I’m buying it, you can’t stop me. Quit arguing before I buy you 3 more.”
But when it comes to himself? Yeah he only indulges in suits and Jordan’s. Other than that, he has an avengers shirt he had since he was 12 and a pinball machine. That’s the extent of his possessions. Well that and the watch you got him for his birthday, but shhhhh he can’t let you know he cares ewwwww.
Man is literally the biggest (for lack of better word) Tsundere. Like Top three in anime. Like you got 1.Kageyama 2.Sasuke 3. Him. Like manz would rather die than say he cares. His love language is quality time and gift giving, so he’s more show you he loves you, but won’t say it first. The kinda mf that when you say I love you to them say, “Yeah I know, I love me too if only there was someone out there who loved you.” Like manz is so obvious I wanna kiss him to shut him the fuck up. (I think I have a type.) like bro the me love you tf?
In terms of icks there is one thing I no for fact. This mf wears socks to bed. And not the cute fluffy kind. The musty ass crusty socks he wore all day, then stepped in water, and now you gotta deal with it while yall cuddling. I hate this mf.
On a more serious note, because of his Bonten Bs, he doesn’t have a lot of time for us. So we make time. His time. We just barge in during his meetings, lay across his lap, watch TikTok’s, while everyone (him) are just looking like “is this bitch serious!?” >:|
Anyways, because he’s so busy all the time, the majority of what he wants to do when he gets home is just to sprawl out on the couch and just stay there. You can cuddle with him too or whatever he doesn’t mind🙄. But fair warning, he’s the kinda dude who is only ever in the mood for either ww2 documentary’s or like deep sea documentary’s. Like mf has the same movie taste as my dad, I can’t with him. It’s a good day when you can convince him to try something actually entertaining. And you know what he picks? The Fucking exorcist. He’s an asshole. The kinda dude to pretend he’s unfazed, but his left leg physically won’t stop shaking.
speaking of movies, I know I say this every time, but scream Halloween costumes. Yes. Give me Rinny as ghostface please, I’ll freaking sell my soul. Especially if it’s not the robe but one of the like dry fit and leather harness- *incomprehensible pterodactyl noises* 🥵
anyway back to cuddling, his go to position is literally the Hakari and Kirara thing. Like this mf will always have a hand on your ass. He doesn’t like PDA but this? Yeah you can’t stop him. He is an ass guy, it’s just where his hand naturally gravitates.
I cannot explain the urge to play daddies home by usher every time I see him. Like he and my baby daddy Gojo have partial custody over that song. Like bro. Yes.
Tbh I don’t see him having a big wedding. Or any wedding. I think his thing would be just handing you his debit card and saying “pick some shit out. No, don’t worry bout the price I’m rich for a reason.” And after that yall just elope to some tropical place across the planet for like a month.
speaking of travel it’s a pretty common thing for you. Just that it’s always last minute. Like bro don’t even give you time to brag to the your friends. Man just pulls up 10 minutes before y’all need to go to the airport and says, “get ready, we’re going to France. How long? Idk a month? Boo hoo bitch. Stay home then. Mhm that’s wtf k thought”. Manz is such an ass but you gotta love a walking wallet.
My last thought I’m gonna share is how he physically won’t use nicnames. Like babe is the physically most he can bring himself to do. Maybe baby. He gives himself the ick every time he thinks of doing anything else
all in all, he’s the one who is always there for you, and expects the same. He’s a great guy, under all the stress and yakuza bs. Treat him well, or I’ll treat him better😤
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ sorry this took me so long to write, I’m working on another request too, and more importantly, my final exams for collage, love that. But even do, if you liked this, please like and request something, and I will definitely be posting. Love y’all so much, I’ll see yall later.
17 notes · View notes
val-thomas · 1 year
Photo
Tumblr media
RAAHH JUMPSCARE JUMPSCARE 
2 notes · View notes
lotus-pear · 2 months
Text
Tumblr media Tumblr media
I AM SHITTJING MYSELF WHY DOES HE HAVE THE SPECIAL EDITION $1.5K VICTORIA’S SECRET RED SATIN PAJAMAS
1K notes · View notes
varilien · 2 years
Text
Tumblr media
it doesn’t matter how heavy your cross to bear is; you can still smile!
635 notes · View notes
moregraceful · 10 days
Text
my queues ran out and i was at church all morning and will be there again this evening and will be at church tomorrow for like 12-13 hours and i just want to write fanfic and be stupid on the internet 😭 my life is so unendingly difficult i tell you what
17 notes · View notes
moe-broey · 3 months
Text
HEARTBREAKING
Worst Dad You Know Has an Extremely Endearing (Now) Reoccurring Character Trait
Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media
For further context: this whole FB involved Sharena and Henriette seeking out lockpickers in the Order of Heroes to open this VERY SECURELY locked box from Gustav's room that took Tina's special staff to finally crack open (or rather -- "steal" the contents out of. No one could actually break the lock!)
And the first instance of this!
Tumblr media Tumblr media
It makes me wonder if he saved anything related to Sharena..........
#fire emblem#feh#man. henriette's sad portrait w 'yes. he must have' carries so much bittersweet grief. augh#when it comes to sharena idk if i would be more angry if he did save something or if he didn't. i'm almost leaning towards the first though#like. idk if i can even word it but it fucking sucks when you have family that 'loves' you and they do actually genuinely love you#but they just. do it wrong. and fail you severely in the process. you think to yourself it would have been easier actually#if they had simply never loved you at all. or if they were upfront and told you they don't love you anymore.#at least then you can be as vindictive as you want and hold a grudge forever and be completely justified#but extremely begrudgingly this DOES make gustav a compelling character. in so many ways#you can see where it all went wrong. you can see henriette sees something in him that no one else can. and she's not crazy for it#she was probably there. she probably saw it all happen. she knows him w a level of intimacy no one else does.#and now you see these little humanizing traits. he loved his son. he loved his partner and wife.#juries still out on his daughter.#but you get what i'm saying right? it's terribly tragic. it's painful.#man.#i'm still gustav's number one hater though. just so we're clear.#AUGH IT'S JUST. THE PLAYFULNESS OF IT. IS ACTUALLY SO PAINFUL. LOOKING AT EVERYTHING WE KNOW#they had a rock competition........ to find the roundest rock.......... and she won....... and he saved the rock she found......#THAT'S. AAAAAAAAAAUUUUUUUUUUUGGGGGGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH#you cannot fucking IMAGINE gustav doing that. and yet. in another time. he did. and that's who henriette fell in love with#and that's who herniette still sees. and she's not fucking wrong for it. not entirely. he still has that fucking rock.#dude i'm gonna be sick.#fe gustav#fe henriette#sharena#fe tina#fe alfonse#he's. mentioned. might as well tag him LMFAO
19 notes · View notes
b4kuch1n · 6 months
Text
I'm not gonna screenshot it bc 1/it really doesn't matter that much and 2/the person who made the comment is a kid but: a while ago I made a comic that's supposed to be a genuine study and reinterpretation of someone else's sprite comic (made in the spirit of authenticity too - to recreate the vibes of the sprite comics from that era, iirc very specifically because it's funny) and I got a comment on that comic's post that's like "glow up"
which is a compliment obvs. and the commenter probably didn't mean anything by it, it's a common expression. but I've been trying to find a way to gracefully put that comment away ever since it appeared lol
I just very much don't want my art to be taken as trying to one-up someone else's art when that's not the piece's intention. especially when the piece that inspired my art is perceived as "low effort" or "shitpost" or stuff like that. I did mention in the tags of that post that my considering it a study is entirely genuine, and I can legitimately write pages about the cool stuff I find in it other than and inherent in the haha funneys, but that's not for you guys that's for me. I just think that approaching art competition-first like that is a miserable way to do it, and (tipping into overthinking here if the whole tiny-comment-got-stuck-in-my-brain-for-almost-a-month part hasn't given that away yet lol) I really don't want that to be the takeaway from my own art. at least generally. if I actually think the source material is trash and what I'm doing is genuinely categorically better I'd just come out and say it lmao
#bakuspeech#yeah it's the darkhog sprite comic#honestly I don't love comments that put my art and other artists' art in a hierarchy in general. wherever my art lands on that scale#especially when it comes to character writing and trans 'representation'#which like. idk man I'm writing One character. he's NOT gonna be The Trans Experience. he's gonna be one character.#but yeah I'd guess I'm writing it all out in a post bc it's not really a race that anyone opts in#I don't actively participate but by virtue of how my art is perceived I just end up on the scale anyway#so uh. I'm suggesting that we do not bring the scale into my house at all lmao#there's also the like. Don't Yuck My Yum guideline of looking at art that's like#I like the things I'm aping! most of the times! if I don't say it's shit and I'm drawing stuff from it usually that means I like it lol#and then you kinda come in like wow what you're doing here is better than the thing you like. and it's not like yknow.#really anything. it's extremely trivial comparatively. but you are in fact yucking my yum there#tldr please try not to think abt art u like vs art u don't as ''better'' or ''worse'' and#have grace for the things that don't please u personally. anyways I'm omw to finishing the frog now. just need to fell all the seams down#and put that boy in da spinner for a ride. and then it can live in a gift bag until the day#I really enjoy holding it actually... maybe after this one I'll make something else. tbh slick stretchy fabrics are superior to fuzzy fabri#doesn't pill And cooler to touch. stuffed toys for the subtropical population#I'll get a combilation of pics once the thing's at its new home. but for now. we must finish the job
30 notes · View notes
invalidname19 · 2 years
Text
Tumblr media
Sadly I have a Twitter now 😕
It’s invalidname_19, such a unique username 🤩
256 notes · View notes
gregoftom · 1 year
Video
where do i even start
#tomgreg#stay tuned for a special thing at the end#FIRST OFF CAN I JUST SAY. thinking about my own various skills and abilities tom says as he MOVES CROTCH FIRST TOWARDS GREG.#and he's just told greg his skills. he's got a big dick and fucks fast and hard. so like. there's that.#i'm either to assume he's already showed said skills off to greg and referring to it or he's literally being suggestive#either unconsciously or consciously.#also he wiggles his crotch a little. like. we get it you wanna fuck greg so bad it makes you look stupid.#ok so we've got the tom not tiptoeing around this like he did with shiv and straight up saying i'm not fucking happy#with you going off with somebody else. i don't like it. why are you happy and i'm not that's not fair.#you're mine. i'm not jealous tho haha#we've got them going through what looks like a wedding arch.#we've got them full on acting like a married couple with greg making excuses for tom and holding him back a little. acting like his wife.#we've got tom switching chiding greg for saying something and the ''don't say that!!'' and then greg agreeing#and saying that actually no tom is a lovely man. oh don't mind my husband he's just grouchy!#and then the WAY tom says you've ruined it like he's about to throw up or cry. or both.#and then greg being like ?? how i have ruined it?? and tom ''idk you just HAVE'' all petulant like#and you know what i'm gonna say. a schoolboy.#he's like thanks i hate it#it really is so much this episode. so much.#i have an idea from it of what fic i could write so there's something at least. a
42 notes · View notes
supercantaloupe · 9 months
Text
truly detest how pcos tags/forums/etc are absolutely crawling with terfs
#(okay to rb but stay in your lane)#maybe i just want to look and see if anyone else has experienced what i went through today without seeing someone going like#'you'll never be a REAL woman because you DON'T HAVE OVARIES#and will NEVER understand the TRUE WOMANLY EXPERIENCE of having A VERY DISRUPTIVE AND COMPLEX ENDOCRINE AND METABOLIC DISORDER'#like i think there are more important (read: actual) targets to direct our frustration at here than#[checks notes] getting mad at a trans woman for saying she relates to some of the problems caused/faced by having pcos#like. idk. the fucking medical system and lack of research/treatment options#(also. christ. reducing every person w pcos into the 'woman' category automatically bc 'ovary'.#even though it's literally an intersex condition. yikes.)#also i don't know about y'all but i don't wish this on anyone? regardless of gender??#i actually don't want trans women to have to experience this in order to be considered a True Woman#because i don't want ANYBODY to have to experience this. it sucks! it's not fucking fun!#i just wanted to try and see if other people have gone through the same thing i have. not expand my blocklist by half a mile tonight.#i wanna talk about me#even though i didn't exactly find what i was looking for (😔) and i had to play fucking whack-a-terf while searching#if there's any bright side to be found it's the number of posts/people affirming pcos as an intersex condition/identity#i saw someone say 'if you don't want the [intersex] umbrella for yourself you don't have to take it#but it's nice to have in the closet for a rainy day'#and. man. yeah.
24 notes · View notes
kelocitta · 11 months
Note
I love your RW art month tiles. What art program do you use and how do you get those really clean textures and shapes?
I use PaintToolSai, both 1 and 2- but most of the drawing gets done in SAI1 since I couldn't get my brushes to import right for 2. Its an extremely bare bones program all things considered (Sai2 less so, it has a bit more tool-wise, but I only draw in it if i *have* too or for minor stuff) so its nothing really fancy being employed, everything geometric I do just by using a self made grid to measure out shapes like you would a piece of paper.
Literally its just a measured out grid of like... 50 by 50 px squares with cross sections? I just paste it as needed and draw the lines around it and since the measurements are consistent it just works.
Tumblr media Tumblr media
my default pen is already "crunchy" so being perfectly matched isnt a huge deal, and you can general paste and rotate to make it look a little cleaner. Honestly I've used this same grid for forever (and it was off by like one pixel at one point lol) its just really useful for quick matching things for a program that doesn't have stuff built in for lining things up As for the textures, those are all default to SAI (I think?). The brush I use lightly uses of fabri (which mostly just makes the edges of the brush grainier) and then I usually also put some various level of a layer texture overlay thats just one of SAI's default 'watercolor' textures. It mostly just adds a little bit of a noise/grain effect. Heres that on max
Tumblr media
For ArtMonth itself I just draw out a tile canvas using the grid with all the layers broken up- then I just reuse it over and over as needed. There's probably smarter ways to do it, but eh it works
Tumblr media
And yeah, theres just two borders. One for the bottom and one for the top, makes it easy to make something that goes 'in and out' of the tiles without having to think to much. Just snip as needed
Tumblr media
27 notes · View notes
elegyofthemoon · 9 days
Text
ok but do i want to actually sit and read through all the clockie animation stuff so i have better foundation for what i want to say? i guess
#avil plays hsr#idk if i actually want to write this ramble because i started rewatching a bunch of scenes that i needed to figure my thoughts out#but the more i gather the more im getting lost with myself so im like MMMMM#i gotta line these pieces up first#i think the trickiest thing about gallagher is wondering how much of what he says is true vs false#UH#ill just tag this as#hsr 2.1 spoilers#because thats the ramble in the tags#but like as a follower of enigmata hes prone to lying and conjuring even more riddles to confuse you#so i just have to wonder too#and if his whole facade as gallagher is fake. then how did he actually become part of the bloodhound?#sunday points out how gallagher stoles features from so many members of the family so. i just have to wonder#he couldnt have changed his identity without being noticed#so thats where i get confused. like How did you get in here in the first place using your disguise?#how did you fool people?#ANSWER MY QUESTIONS MAN (SHAKES GALLAGHER)#at the very least though: i think what he says about mikhail is true#i want to believe those are true even despite his false front#the things i want to talk about is like#well first i wanna make a whole timeline of the historical events of penacony#and that will give me a better idea of how things led to one another to present time#and THANKFULLY i rewatched because now i understand what gallagher meant possibly by traitor#but how did the family come to be?#how did the dreammaster come to be? (SHAKES THE GAME)#ok so i have to read more. so this will take longer#unfortunately maybe by the time i get all the information i want itll be too late and someone else wouldve said#SOMEONE PROBABLY DID#but i like the satisfaction of pulling the pieces together myself. thats the satisfaction of solving cases and puzzles ✨#my desk looks ridiculous now because its like. sticky notes everywhere because im like I HAVE TO MAKE NOTE OF THIS
5 notes · View notes
Text
I kind of miss getting to know the interior of other people’s homes. So many of my friendships in adulthood are distant, or long distance/only talking over the phone, difficult to make actual plans with because of Real Life Schedules Now, etc. etc., but like in school and stuff as a kid you can just hang out at someone’s house for a few days, have a sleepover every weekend, etc. etc. I still remember the interior of all of my childhood friend’s homes, I remember all the details to the rooms and the layout of the yards and etc. etc. There’s just something kind of neat about Knowing another person’s housing space, what the décor says about them, the history of how they came to live there and their household routines and what it’s like, etc. I feel like it can be an important part of really deeply understanding someone so it’s weird to talk to and vaguely know a handful of people, but also not even know what their bedrooms look like or how they organize the dishes after washing them or etc. etc. 
#'intrictae knowledge of another person in an extremely mundane way' my beloved#i also just really love looking at interiors like I'm fascinated with how people decorate their own spaces or what they have aorund#in the environment and what it says about them. Does anyone else snoop the backround of photos and videos and stuff?#like if theres a youtube video or a picture or something anyone posts and it has like a candid normal indoor space as the background#I'll pause or zoom in or whatever and really try to look around. see what's there. just make observations#not in a crerrpy way but just like.. idk I feel like it Says Something. I also love seeing people's computer desktops and phone screens#amnd looking at how they organize their apps or files or what aesthetic they give things. If I'm wathing someone play a game and they#accidentally exit to the desktop or something I always pause and try to see whatever I can glean from it lol#Bedrooms. Phone screens. Desktop of a computer. Also real life desk top that the computer is sitting on. etc. These are all spaces that are#mostly organized by and utilized by really just the ONE person themselves. like nobody else is going to usually be using your#computer or your bedroom nightstand. it's your space that you don't have to think about anyone else interacting with so they way you organiz#e and decorate it is very personal and Just For You. something about spaces like that are so interesting to me like in telling#little tiny details about someone and stuff. And also on a borader scale I just love thinking about how like. you could give 5 people the#same exact space and each of them would organize it and decorate it completely differently. and all of it would be an indication of their#tastes and personality and lifestyle. I used to want to be an apartment complex maintenace man because I would get to enter into everyone's#identical layout apartments and see how different they all are and what variety of things people have done to customize the same space#and what it might say about them or etc. etc. etc. Also probably weird but sometimes when throwing something away#I'll look at people's trash a little like if I'm in a realative;s house. which literally gives no important information but I love little#details like 'oh someone in the house had a snickers bar earlier today.' 'oh they bought a lightbulb I wonder which of the lightbulbs#went out' and then I look around the house at the shapes of the light fixtures or if there are any other clues (like a screwdriver or#ladder nearby) to see which one it is or etc. etc. ANYWAY .. idk..#one of my Big Fascinations. I just love seeing people's personal spaces and knowing little obscure mundane details that#dont matter really but it Matters To Me just because I love gathering every miniscule tidbit of data about anything in any situation#whether it's relevant or not. seek knowledge just for knowledge's sake I guess lol. Maybe thats an enneagram type 5 thing or something#else lol. ANYWAY.. thought about this because I have such a strong compulsion to ask everyone I know like long distance friends#for pictures of their bedrooms and phone screens and desktops but also for people who don't have the same Weird Interest In Interios#*Interiors and stuff that I do I feel like that just comes off extremely freakish ghbjhbb#I PROMISE IM NOT GATHERING DATA ON YOU! or like.. I am. but not maliciously. just in a manner of earnest detached intellectual fascination
67 notes · View notes