#logan is slowly losing the will to think deeper into an issue | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

averykedavra · 3 years

Text

wherever we are (it feels like home)

Good evening, I am exhausted and here is a fic for my friend @rain-bound because Rain asked for prinxiety and I decided to deliver, three weeks later, at ten at night. Enjoy this self-indulgent hurt/comfort, because I’m about to collapse into bed and sleep for seventy years. You’re the best, Rain <3

(Title from End of the Earth by MARINA. This fic is on Ao3 here!)

Words: 8463

Pairing: Romantic Prinxiety

Warnings: lots of angst for both Virgil and Roman, mentions of the other Sides but they don’t appear, self-deprecation, anxiety and borderline panic attacks, self-hatred, identity issues, crying, and kissing

Three days.

That’s how long it took for Virgil to mess it all up. Three freaking days.

Honestly, he wasn’t even that surprised--if there was one thing he was good at, it was messing stuff up. Thomas had the chance of a lifetime. The person of a lifetime. Virgil had done something good, something brave, and now Thomas had a date.

It was too good to be true.

So he’d messed it up.

They’d been texting, and Thomas had sent a text where the tone was way off--like, way off, like Nico-probably-hated-them-off, and yeah, it was a bit hasty to say that after one text but--but then Thomas tried to apologize and hit send before he was done--and then Nico called them--and Thomas couldn’t talk on the phone, he’d sound stupid and what would he say and no--

Virgil made Thomas deny the call.

The call from Nico. Who knew they had their phone with them. Who knew they weren’t busy.

When Thomas stopped the ringing, a deafening silence filled the room.

He hadn’t even called Nico back--Logan said something about calming down, which was fair, because Virgil was hyperventilating in the corner. Logan counted with him. Logan steadied him.

Logan said it was okay. That one mistake, especially one so small, wouldn’t jeopardize everything. Logan said that things wouldn’t always be so fragile. They’d fall into a rhythm. And for now, they’d fix things.

Virgil tried to breathe. Tried to believe him.

And still knew he’d come so terrifying close to losing everything.

It was so easy. That’s what they’d all learned that day. If Virgil messed up, just a bit, their relationship went down the drain. It wasn’t the point that things got fixed, that Thomas apologized and everyone moved on--that didn’t replace how delicate things were, how everyone was newly aware that this whole thing could shatter if Virgil stepped wrong.

If any of them stepped wrong. But Virgil, it was obvious, was the weak link.

Virgil was going to ruin this.

Of course you’re not, Patton said. Patton said it wasn’t his fault, that they’d all panicked. Patton said he was doing great.

That’s illogical, Logan said. Logan said anyone could have made the same mistake. Logan said Virgil had helped so much already.

Janus hadn’t said anything--Janus had been hanging around a bunch recently, which Virgil wasn’t really on board with, though he hadn’t given Virgil an excuse to yell at him yet--but he’d given Virgil a slow nod.

Thanks, Thomas said when everything was said and done that afternoon. Always keeping me on my toes, Virgil. I appreciate it.

And that would have been enough. It would have been way more than enough.

But there was Roman.

Roman, who was already infatuated with Nico. Roman, who grabbed Virgil’s hands and spun him around that first day, laughing, smiling so much that Virgil’s heart could have burst. Roman, who’d said this is it, called it their newest chance at happiness, and told Virgil he was brave.

Roman cared so deeply about this. He’d been so quiet recently, so hesitant, and it made Virgil burn with a worry he didn’t recognize. The kind of worry, the kind of care, that made Virgil warm and energized and terrified for someone other than himself.

He didn’t really know what that meant. He’d probably be able to figure it out if he thought about it. He decided not to think about it.

Roman. That was all he needed to know. Roman.

Roman, who had ignored him all day, who had picked at his food and not spoken to anyone, who had flinched when Virgil said his name before mumbling something and excusing himself.

Roman, who was upset with him.

That realization made Virgil feel like he was breathing in shards of glass. He’d retreated to his room, done some breathing exercises, and tried to think through it. Roman was mad about what had happened, Virgil knew it--maybe he thought Virgil didn’t care as much as he did. Which was so wrong. Virgil cared just as much as Roman did, because Roman did.

Maybe he thought Virgil did it on purpose. Maybe he was just angry that another chance could be wasted because Virgil couldn’t stop messing everything up.

Virgil was terrified.

Virgil was worried.

Virgil was worried that Roman was not okay. Against all his better judgment, he wanted to ask Roman how Roman felt.

And Virgil was terrified to confirm that Roman hated him--terrified he might make things worse--terrified to see Roman would turn him away--because anyone’s scorn would hurt him but Roman--Roman. Virgil couldn’t think of anything worse than Roman being upset with him.

Well, actually, he could.

Roman being upset.

Roman was upset. And even though Virgil was scared, that didn’t matter right now, because Virgil needed to do something.

That something was apologize. Virgil needed to apologize. And Roman could do whatever afterwards. Virgil’d be fine with Roman hating him afterwards as long as Roman knew he was sorry.

Maybe that’d help. Maybe that wouldn’t. Maybe Virgil didn’t care, because he was done standing by.

Roman had called him brave.

He was going to be brave.

That night, after everyone was asleep or doing a good enough job of pretending to be, Virgil crept down the hall to Roman’s room.

He should have come earlier. Roman was probably asleep, too. But Virgil was nocturnal by this point, and he’d only just managed to work up the courage, and he’d lose it again if he waited a second longer.

Okay, he was already losing his courage. He could feel it slipping away, replaced by panic-anxiety-fear-worry that made him dig his hands deeper into his pockets and take a few strangled breaths. This was fine. This was fine! He would check up on Roman, apologize, and hopefully not be told that he was a terrible friend. Yeah. Yeah!

“Yeah,” Virgil told himself, his voice sounding off in the darkened hallway. “Knock. Come on.”

Slowly, he forced one hand out of his hoodie and balled it in a fist. He took another deep breath. It made his head spin.

This was a terrible idea.

But he was going to be brave right now, and he was going to check on Roman, and--and whatever was going to happen would happen. Nothing he could do about it.

Virgil held his breath and knocked once.

He tried to keep it to a gentle tap--’cause maybe he’d have plausible deniability, say he bumped the door while going to bed, and maybe Roman wouldn’t hear it at all and Virgil could just go back to his room and pretend everything was fine--but Virgil swore the sound echoed three times around the hallway. He pressed himself into the shadows and waited for someone’s door to open. Nobody came to check on him. They were all asleep.

Like Roman probably was. And now Virgil was going to disturb him, wake him up, and Roman always complained about losing beauty sleep--what was Virgil doing--

Helping a friend.

Virgil knocked again, louder, and resisted the strong impulse to curl into a ball and hide.

There was a long, dark, silence.

Virgil could run. He could just--he could just run, bolt for his room, and say it was a prank from Remus if anyone asked--

“Who is it?”

Virgil’s breath caught. Roman’s voice was sleepy but sharp, and he heard Roman walk towards the door. The knob turned.

Run.

This was Roman. Roman was fine. Roman was safe--Virgil knew he was safe. Roman wouldn’t hurt him.

Virgil stayed still.

The door cracked open. “Hello?”

“Hi,” Virgil forced out.

Roman’s head peeked around the door. He had a severe case of bedhead, with hair flopping over his eyes and pushed up at the back like he’d run his fingers through it. Virgil found that ridiculously adorable.

“Virgil!” Roman said, and for a second, he seemed about to smile. Then it faded. Then it was just Roman, blinking tiredly at Virgil with bags under his eyes, his mouth drawn in a thin line. “What do you need?”

“I, um--” Virgil had prepared a quick speech for this. He couldn’t remember a word of it. It--it included the word ‘and,’ right? Definitely ‘and.’ Maybe ‘but,’ too. “I--I know it’s really late, and I’m sorry, but--” There! Nailed it. “But I need to talk to you.”

“Hmm?” Roman seemed to shake himself all the way awake. His mouth drew tighter. “Talk about what?’

Virgil hesitated. “Nico.”

“Nico,” Roman repeated. “Nico?”

“Nico,” Virgil agreed. He probably sounded so stupid, just parroting Roman, but he couldn’t think of what else to say. “So can I--is this a good time--of course it’s not, you’re asleep, but--”

“I--actually, I was awake, it’s alright.” Roman pulled the door a little wider. “Let’s get this over with, shall we?”

Virgil nodded, swallowed, and let Roman lead the way into his room.

The only lights were a string of fairy lights and a lamp by the desk. They cast a dim golden glow over the room, leaving the red as ashy shadows and the white as creamy dust. Virgil stumbled over something on the floor, and when he looked down, he saw several piles of clothes and bits of paper strewn across the floorboards. The carpet was kicked to the side. Virgil straightened it automatically, and saw a stain in one corner, and a worn patch that dragged over the boards in a way that suggested it was a few days from falling apart.

Outside the window, Roman had chosen a city skyline--dots of white and red filling the sky, lights strung along the buildings like square beads, airplanes blinking their way from place to place. If Virgil breathed in deep, he could smell Roman in this room, like always. Roman smelled like fresh paper. Like rose petals. Like cinnamon. Like something warm and cozy, and Virgil could never get enough of it.

Roman gave Virgil a strange look, and Virgil frantically tried to look like he hadn’t just been smelling Roman’s room like a total creep.

“Sit down, if you’d like,” Roman said, collapsing onto the bed and kicking his legs onto the pillows. Virgil hesitantly perched on the desk chair. Several notebooks spilled across the desk itself, and Virgil quickly looked away. It felt weird to see Roman’s stuff like this--it always did.

Virgil loved Roman’s room, but it wasn’t where he belonged. It was Roman’s space. Virgil was just a visitor--an intruder--an unwelcome guest who ruined the smell of parchment and clashed with the red on the walls.

Virgil loved Roman’s room, but Roman’s room didn’t love him back.

“So,” Roman said, and Virgil realized Roman had been watching him. In the shadows, Virgil couldn’t pick out Roman’s expression--and that set him on edge in a way he didn’t expect, because he knew Roman, and he’d at least banked on being able to read him. Now? Roman could be angry. Roman could be tired. Roman could be any number of things, and Virgil couldn’t tell.

Virgil took a deep breath for like the twentieth time that night and tried really, really hard not to panic.

Roman’s room did make it easier. It was relaxing that way. Maybe it was a thing like Virgil’s room making people more anxious, a side effect of Roman’s power. Maybe it was just because it was Roman’s. Either way, Virgil found that if he tried--if he really tried, and didn’t think about anything except, like, cupcakes--he could avoid entirely breaking down.

Great. Now he had to actually talk.

“So,” Virgil said, an embarrassingly long time after Roman had spoken, but too late to worry about that now. “Um--Nico?”

“Yep, we’ve...we’ve established that one, stormcloud,” Roman said, a touch of fondness in his voice. “We’ve made that clear. Next we go into details.”

“Details. Yeah.” Virgil nodded way too fast. “Cool. So--um.”

“Are you going to talk, or…” Roman laughed a bit. It was a short, sharp laugh, but it was soft enough to make Virgil relax a bit. “It’s okay if you don’t, but I did figure you called this little meeting for a reason, emo.”

“I did,” Virgil protested. “I just--ugh, I don’t know where to start, I--” He looked around. “Um--how are you?”

“What?” Roman was quiet for a second. “I’m...quite princely and glittery, as usual, why do you ask?”

“You--you sure?” Virgil scuffed his toe into the carpet. If Roman wasn’t okay, that was something to talk about--that was maybe a reason he’d avoided Virgil that wasn’t anger--and Virgil was such a coward. Why’d Roman ever call him brave? “Your, um--your room’s a bit of a mess.”

“I suppose I must admit that,” Roman agreed, sitting up and giving the floor a betrayed look. “I’ve been so wrapped up in projects that I’ve hardly had time to clean up.”

“You could have asked one of us,” Virgil said. “I could have, y’know, swept the place a bit. Cleaning’s, like, relaxing for me. I know you don’t really like people in your room, though.”

Roman’s eyebrows came together. “Who told you that?”

“No one?” Virgil blinked. “I just--I mean, I guess I just assumed--”

A sinking feeling in his stomach told him that of course Roman liked other people in his room. He just didn’t like Virgil.

“Forget it,” Virgil mumbled. “Just--yeah.”

He could feel that Roman was watching him. He curled into his hoodie and wondered if he tried hard enough, he could get swallowed up by the shadows.

This was a disaster.

And it could have been better--he’d know what to say if this was Logan, or Patton, or even Janus--but this was Roman. Roman. Roman, who was--he was--

Ugh.

“We need to talk,” Virgil blurted out. Maybe if he said it enough, he’d believe it. They needed to talk. To get this over with. Even if it hurt. “I--I’m really nervous about this, ‘cause obviously, but--” Why’d he say that? To get pity points? Now Roman would be forced to feel bad for him. “--but it’s not a big deal--I mean, it is, but--”

“Virgil.”

Virgil jerked his head up. Roman had turned on another lamp. He was sitting on the edge of the bed, expression achingly soft.

“What?” Virgil asked, all his haunches raised, all his guards up.

“If you’re not ready, we don’t have to do this.” Roman swallowed. “I know it’s--it’s an emotional conversation, and if you would rather Patton or Logan be here--or if you’d like to wait?”

Virgil could wait.

But Virgil needed to--

“We need to talk now,” Virgil said. “I--I won’t have the guts to do it otherwise, I’m sorry--”

“Alright,” Roman said. Virgil thought he saw Roman sink a bit, though. “That works. Take your time, okay? Keep breathing.”

“Okay,” Virgil said. He tried not to feel optimistic about the fact that Roman cared enough to keep him from panicking. Roman could care about him and still be mad--or Roman could just want Virgil to be calm enough for the conversation to happen all at once. Which didn’t really make sense, but Virgil wasn’t about to hope, wasn’t about to try and erase the past days of Roman being upset with him.

With Roman being upset.

If this made Roman feel better, it was worth it.

“So,” Virgil said. And told himself this time--finally--he’d get it right. “We want to talk about Nico?”

“Nico,” Roman agreed, something soft and sad crossing his face.

“He’s--” Virgil fought for words. “He’s--he’s so good, yeah? He’s great. Thomas really likes him, and so do I--I really like him, Roman.”

“I know,” Roman said. Softly. Too softly, and Virgil was waiting for the other shoe to drop. “He’s wonderful.”

“Yeah!” Virgil said. Loudly. Too loudly. His voice echoed through Roman’s room--and he noticed that, unlike all the other times he’d been here, there wasn’t any music playing.

Okay, yeah, it was late. But--it made Virgil’s heart clench a bit, it made his hands jam further into his pockets, and it made him kick at the floor with more vehemence. It was another thing that was wrong--piled onto everything else, onto the shadows and the crumpled papers and everything from the door to the windows. Everything was wrong. Was it wrong because Virgil was there, messing it up? Or had something been wrong from the start?

Patches of light, gold and white and red, skidded over Virgil’s jacket. From the window, from the lamps, from the fairy lights high above. They bled through the purple patches and turned them an ugly shade of brown.

“Nico’s great,” said Virgil, slowly, quietly. Like he didn’t want to disrupt something. “And--and Thomas messed up a bit, the other day.”

I messed up, he didn’t finish with. Roman would know.

“He did,” Roman said, voice tight.

“And that’s--I think that’s maybe a sign that--” Virgil waved a hand, felt self-conscious about said hand existing, and shoved it back into his hoodie. “Look, I like Nico. So much. And I really think we can do this if we try--I mean, I hope so, I really hope so--”

“We can,” Roman interrupted. “We have to make this work.”

“Right. Yeah.” Virgil took a breath. “So--”

“So we’ll work harder.” Roman waved a hand at Virgil. “We’re--we can do this, we’re ready, if Thomas is ready than we’re ready! All of us!”

“I’m not saying we’re not ready,” Virgil said. “I’m saying we need to be careful.”

The brief passion in Roman’s eyes faded again. “I know.”

“So--so--” Virgil tried to force himself to stick words together. He should apologize. He should say sorry and let Roman figure out what to do next, but it was shadowy and cold and smelling of red paint and parchment and Virgil was lost.

“I know,” Roman said again. He sounded tired. It was late--and he’d been awake--and he sounded exhausted--and he hadn’t been planning to sleep, he’d said he had trouble sleeping--and Virgil felt like he was grasping at puzzle pieces, trying to pull the shadows and lights into something coherent. He felt vaguely dizzy. His stomach churned. Maybe it was Roman’s room making him see all these dots to connect, filling him with the worst kind of imagination.

“It’ll be okay,” Virgil said. To Roman? To himself? To someone, anyway.

Roman curled into himself, just a bit. “I don’t know.”

Virgil swallowed the lump in his throat. “Yeah, actually. I--me neither.”

A long silence. Imaginary airplanes skidded over the skyline, and Virgil wished he could go on one of them, fly far away from here. And take Roman, if he was willing--take Roman and steal him away from all this and keep him happy and safe--they could both be safe. And they could see the world.

“So,” Virgil said, slowly, for the seventh or eighth time, like that’d drag the conversation to its conclusion. “I know you’ve been avoiding us--”

“I haven’t been avoiding you,” Roman interrupted. Too fast. Too vehement. Roman was definitely lying, and Virgil hated how bad that made him feel.

“I know you have,” Virgil said, hating even more the defensive edge his voice gained. “I know you’ve been avoiding me, and--and if you’re cool with that, I’m cool with that, but--”

“It wasn’t on purpose,” Roman lied again. Barely trying this time, like he didn’t care if Virgil saw through it. “I’ve just been a bit wrapped up in projects, Stormy Knight, I promise it wasn’t--”

“Princey, c’mon.” Something about the familiar nickname gave Virgil courage. “I don’t mind. I get it! It’s...it’s justified, it was all a mess a few days ago, it’s--if I’m being honest, it’s been a mess this whole time, and--and you can take as much time as you need to figure stuff out on your end. Or--or maybe there’s nothing to figure out, maybe it’s not like that, but--” Virgil was rambling again. He knotted his hands together and focused on the texture of his jacket. “Maybe you--maybe you’ve already made up your mind, maybe this can’t really be fixed, but--”

Everything was a mess. Everything was coming out all wrong and Virgil needed to say something that made sense. His head was spinning with lights and shadows and the smell of roses. He was sure he was tilting forward in the chair. It was late at night. He was running on adrenaline and guilt. He was trying and he didn’t know if Roman got it--if Roman understood that Virgil was sorry, that Virgil would try to be better, and that Roman could be angry as long as he liked, but Virgil was here for him and didn’t want him to be upset--

There! There was what to say! So why couldn’t Virgil say it out loud?

“I’m--this is coming out wrong,” Virgil blurted out. “I’m really not making any sense, am I?”

“I think I’ve put the bigger pieces together,” Roman said.

“Which pieces?”

Roman gave Virgil a sharp look and Virgil wilted. The look softened.

“I can tell you what I’ve got so far,” Roman suggested. “How about that? And then, if I’ve got it wrong, you can correct me. I can ask questions if I’m confused. Does that work?”

Virgil almost collapsed with relief. Yeah. He could do that.

“Sure,” he said. “Shoot, Princey.”

“You’re talking about what happened a few days ago,” Roman said. “When Thomas made a bit of a mistake with Nico. And--and in general, all the bumps we’ve had in the road here, you know? It hasn’t exactly been the smoothest of rides.”

“It hasn’t,” Virgil admitted. “And yeah, that’s--what I was talking about.”

“Good!” Roman looked almost pleased with himself, and Virgil suppressed a smile. “So--we have to work from here, right? We have to figure out--you know, who’s helping and who’s not, and how we can work together. And make sure we’re all clear about--” Something passed over his face. “Who’s not necessarily meant to play a huge role, if we want this to work.”

Virgil balled his fists. “Yeah.”

“We both care about Thomas,” Roman said, a sad smile crossing his face. “I’m sorry that I’ve been avoiding you. I’ve merely been thinking things through a bit. Nico’s so wonderful, and Thomas deserves him, and it’ll take work for this to become something real.”

“Yeah,” Virgil said numbly.

“So we need to start figuring stuff out on our own ends, and finding out who’s helpful with that and who’s detrimental.” The lights played off Roman’s face as he leaned onto his knees and stared at the floor. “What mistakes can be worked with, and what mistakes are a symptom of something else--and Virgil, I’m so sorry.”

“You--” Virgil felt a strange cold streak pass through his chest, like a comet, an airplane sliding through the sky. “You’re sorry? You don’t--Princey, you don’t have to be--”

“Of course I do!” Roman burst out. “I--you tried so hard to make this happen, you put yourself out there and risked everything for him! I--I gave up, and you kept fighting, and for what? For me to--to ruin everything we’ve built? I’m sorry, I’m trying, and--and I’m really not meant for this, Virgil, I don’t think I am--”

“Meant for--” The cold feeling had spread to Virgil’s whole body now, numbing his fingers. “You’re--Roman, what--”

“I’m sorry,” Roman said again. Like that was an explanation. And his voice cracked in the middle, and it made Virgil want to cry, and he didn’t know what was happening--

“Roman,” Virgil forced out. His voice was raspy. “Roman, what are you talking about? Why are you sorry?”

“I--what?” Roman blinked at him. “Pardon? Why--why wouldn’t I be sorry?”

“Because you didn’t do anything?” Virgil’s voice pitched upwards incredulously. “What are you even saying--I came in here ‘cause you’re mad at me, I’m trying to--”

“Mad at you?” Roman repeated, and apparently it was Roman’s turn to look completely flabbergasted. “Why would I be mad at you?”

“‘Cause I messed up!” Virgil burst out. “I messed up, I almost ruined everything, I’m just so scared I’m gonna take this away from you--and you need it, you deserve it, and I’m trying to get it for you--but I’m not good at this, I’m not good--I’m really sorry, Princey--I promise I’m gonna try--”

“Virgil,” Roman said quietly, and for some reason that made Virgil stop talking immediately. “You--what?”

“I came in here to say sorry,” Virgil said, probably sounding pathetic, but he was confused and tired and three seconds from crying. “I--I’m sorry. There. I don’t know why--why it took me so long to say it.”

“You’re sorry--” Roman looked completely bewildered, but there was concern in there--aching concern that made the lump in Virgil’s throat grow bigger. “You’re sorry--Virgil, I promise you’ve done nothing wrong! I’m not mad at you!”

“You--” Virgil repeated the words in his head. No way he’d just heard that. “You--aren’t?”

“No!” And now Roman looked seriously upset. “You thought I was--Virgil, you’ve done wonderfully during all this, you’re an absolute star, I still can’t believe you made this happen--except I can, quite honestly, I always knew you had it in you--”

Virgil stared at him, mouth open.

“I’m not mad at you,” Roman finished, his voice almost pleading. “I promise. You don’t have to apologize to me.”

“Oh,” Virgil forced out. It didn’t cover anything. It didn’t cover the way he wanted to cry, or laugh, or hug Roman tight and bury his face in Roman’s shoulder and--

“Oh,” Virgil said again.

“You’re doing so good,” Roman whispered. “I’m proud of you.”

“Oh,” Virgil said. A third time. Because he was going to cry.

Roman gave him a soft smile. “You’re my hero.”

And okay--okay, Roman couldn’t just--he couldn’t just--

Before Virgil could stop himself, he raced over to Roman and tackled him in a hug.

Roman made a surprised noise that turned into a coo as he reached up and steadied Virgil’s shoulders. Virgil tightened his grip around Roman and considered burying his head in Roman’s shoulder, like he’d dreamed of--Roman was so solid, and smelled really nice, and maybe Virgil could just fall asleep here, spend the night in Roman’s room and not worry about anything else--

“You alright over there, emo nightmare?” Roman asked, his voice rumbling in Virgil’s chest. “Anything you need?”

And, oh yeah, this was Roman. Virgil had just tackle-hugged Roman.

Virgil quickly pushed himself out of Roman’s arms, falling into a heap on the bed next to him.

“Whoa, hey, where’s the fire?” Roman laughed, but his eyes were still wide with concern. “Are you sure everything’s alright?”

Yes. No. More than ever. It’s never been and Virgil wouldn’t know how to handle it if it was.

“You--” Virgil had something he wanted to say. Besides the sorry. Because--because Roman--

“Me,” Roman agreed, giving Virgil a dorky little smile.

And, okay, not fair, now Virgil was distracted by cute. Virgil swatted at him and hissed, and Roman laughed a bit. It was great. It was normal. It was--

It was too normal.

It was the kind of normal Virgil didn’t trust. ‘Cause a minute ago, they’d been staring at each other and Roman had been--

Apologizing.

Hold on.

“Roman,” Virgil said slowly. “What was all that about?”

“What?” Roman blinked at him. “I’m afraid I don’t know what you mean, lightning bug.”

Virgil fought a flush at the nickname. He swore Roman was doing that on purpose--trying to distract him, turn this on Virgil, but Virgil wasn’t going to lose track of things again. Virgil was going to actually, like, talk about things.

Virgil was such a mess.

Especially late at night, especially while upset, and this was just a cocktail of terrible ideas. And who knew what was going on with Roman? Who knew if Roman was really not okay or if he was fine and Virgil was reading too much into things or--

Only one to find out, though, right?

Bravery.

Virgil looked at Roman. “I’m worried about you.”

There. There it really was. And honestly--under all the guilt, the panic, the self-doubt--this was what Virgil had wanted to say, all along.

Roman, for his part, looked like Virgil had struck him in the face. It took him a few tries to speak. “And may I ask why?”

“You were, like, apologizing earlier,” Virgil said. “You were saying--like, like you thought I was here to yell at you, to say you did something wrong--and I don’t even get that, like what the heck have you done--”

“What haven’t I done?” Roman fired back, and Virgil would mistake it for teasing if it weren’t for the tightness in his mouth and the way he inched away from Virgil on the bed.

“You’ve--you’re Thomas’ romantic side,” Virgil said. “You’re the reason he likes Nico, you’re the one who’s making this work, it’s all you--”

“Don’t you think I know that?” Roman snapped.

Virgil hated the way he flinched.

“I--” Roman looked instantly regretful. “I didn’t mean to yell, I just--”

“It’s fine,” Virgil said. And he took a deep breath. And it was. “I’m saying you’re important. You’re valuable.”

“I know,” Roman said.

“You’re the reason this is happening!”

“I know.”

“Without you, it doesn’t work--”

“I know.”

“We can’t do this without you!”

“Well, maybe you should!”

Virgil flinched again. But not because Roman was too loud--and it was so much better with Roman, it wasn’t perfect and maybe not even that great but it was better, Virgil could take a breath and move forward--but because of Roman’s face. Twisted. Tight. Eyes sparkling in the lights, fists balled on his pajamas, and the way he tried to smile when Virgil looked. He tried to--to smile.

Virgil hated that. So much.

“Roman,” Virgil said, as softly as he could. “We...we need you, we--”

“Yeah, and I’ve been doing a swell job of helping you guys,” Roman said, and that was bitterness, that was a shade of bitter that Virgil had never heard in his life. He hated that, too. “I appreciate the sentiment, Virgil, but I also have to recognize that I’ve hardly been the best at helping Thomas recently--”

“I need you, then.” Virgil didn’t know where the words were coming from. “You know what? Screw Thomas. I’m not talking about him. I need you. I can’t--I’m doing all this for you, Roman. You get that, right? I--you want this, you want this so badly, and so I’m trying to make this happen.” Virgil let out a little laugh that could have been a sob. “And I’m failing. And I’m getting stuck. ‘Cause it’s me. But Roman--Roman, if you need me to, I will keep trying. I will do as much as you need me to.” Virgil choked on something that was definitely a sob. “Because you deserve something good right now. You deserve to be happy.”

Roman was staring at Virgil. Roman was staring and something in him was trembling. Shaking. Coming apart in the shadows and slipping away in the lights.

“And I’m sorry,” Virgil finished. “I’m sorry I’m not doing great at it--and I’m sorry I never told you all this, ‘cause you didn’t know--ugh, I’m sorry I didn’t realize you didn’t know, I didn’t see that you--”

“Virgil,” Roman said, voice choked. “Virgil, you--you don’t have to do any of this. You know that, right? You don’t have to make this work for me--to try and be nice--to be here, right now--”

“But I want to.” Virgil shook his head. “Ro, I want to, so much--this is what I want. I want to help. And you...you need help right now.”

Roman flinched a bit, just enough for Virgil to notice. “I don’t--can’t we wait until morning? I’m always incoherent at night, this is all a bit of a melodramatic moment--”

“Nope,” Virgil said firmly. “We’re not gonna dance around this one, okay? I’ve done enough of that. You’re not--you’re so not okay, and I get the feeling I’m only seeing, like, one quarter of it. And you don’t have to hide that.”

Roman was quiet. His eyes followed the seams of the quilt.

“Hey. Look at me.” Virgil hesitantly placed a hand on Roman’s. “It’s okay. I promise. Talk to me--cry, scream, whatever. But do something. We can’t have any kind of true lo--any kind of...anything. If the relationship isn’t built on truth.”

Roman looked up, slowly, and Virgil saw that his eyes were watering.

Virgil couldn’t help the little noise he made. ‘Cause Roman wasn’t meant to look like that. Like he expected Virgil to turn on him and yell. Like he was trying to disappear into the shadows before anyone could know he was there.

“I don’t--” Roman wiped at his eyes. “Virgil, I don’t know--I can’t--I’m not--”

“What aren’t you?” Virgil asked.

“I’m not what I’m supposed to be!” Roman burst out, and then he was rambling, hands flying. “I’m not productive, I’m not able to focus on anything, I never get stuff done on time--Zeus knows I’m not organized, I’m not serious enough--I’m not creative--and I’m not--I’m not good, I’m not the hero, I’m not the perfect prince and you all need me to be that but I’m not--I’m not anything!”

“Oh,” Virgil breathed, and he shook his head, over and over. “Roman, no, I promise that’s so, so wrong--”

“Then what am I?” Roman challenged, eyes sparkling and voice so brittle. He was seconds from breaking. Virgil was watching his best friend--his everything--break apart, and Virgil should have been frantic. Virgil should have been trying to put the pieces back together before everything comes crashing down.

Virgil took a deep breath.

“Roman,” he said slowly, “do you want a hug?”

“I--” Roman looked like nobody had ever asked that question in his life. “I--if you’re okay with--”

Virgil opened his arms and gave Roman a little nod.

Roman’s hug was stiff. Roman’s hug was cold. Roman’s hug would have lasted about three seconds if Virgil hadn’t wrapped an arm around Roman’s shoulders to keep him there.

“I’m okay with it,” Virgil told him, quietly. “And jeez, Princey, you’re acting like I’m holding a gun to your head. Relax.”

Roman did not relax.

“It’s okay,” Virgil said. Even softer. “It’s okay, I promise it’s okay, it’s so messed up right now but we’re gonna figure this out, I promise--”

Roman trembled, just a bit, in Virgil’s grasp. Virgil shifted slightly until he was leaned against the headboard, and Roman was crumpled in his arms.

“Stop trying to hug me,” Virgil said gently. “It’s messing everything up. I’m hugging you right now--you can hug me later, you dork.”

Roman didn’t move. Virgil carefully slipped him off Virgil’s shoulder and pulled him to his chest instead. Roman--Roman was so small, and it made Virgil wonder how Roman could be so firm and solid and still so small in his arms.

Roman’s head was tucked under Virgil’s now. Virgil had the urge to press a kiss on top of it. He settled for running a hand through Roman’s hair, enjoying the fluffy texture and detangling some of the knots. Bedhead. When was the last time Roman slept?

“I don’t know,” Roman said, when Virgil asked him. “I--I don’t know much, Virge.”

“What do you know?” Virgil asked.

“I--” Roman hesitated. “You guys. Logan likes cinnamon buns, and Patton’s favorite dog breed is a retriever, and you--you bite your nails, but you paint them on weekends sometimes, and you pretend they’re all black but there’s a bit of purple on there, it’s adorable--and you hate strawberries--and once you gave me a gift and pretended it was from Logan but I know it was you because you write your R’s all pointy--and your hair always flops over your eyes, and--”

Virgil fought back a wave of emotion. “Um--that’s great, Ro. I appreciate that. Can you--can you tell me what you know about yourself?”

Roman was silent for way too long. “Why ruin the moment?”

“Disagree,” Virgil said. “Anything? It’s okay if not, but--basic stuff. What do you like? What do you think about?”

“I dunno,” Roman mumbled. “I like Disney. But Disney’s pretty stupid.”

“Hey,” Virgil complained. “Disney’s the best. Don’t crap on your favorite company.”

“Disney’s really capitalist.”

“That’s fair,” Virgil admitted. “But--you’re allowed to like stuff, Ro.”

Roman curled up a bit in his arms.

“What do you know?” Virgil decided to say. “About you. It can be anything.”

Roman was pressed tight against Virgil’s chest. Virgil ran a hand down his side and felt Roman shudder a bit. His hands were moving, running up and down the patches on Virgil’s jacket, fingering the bumps of the seams.

“I’m Roman,” Roman finally said. He laughed a bit. Virgil didn’t.

“Good, that’s true.” Virgil nodded. “What else?”

“I’m a Side of Thomas,” Roman continued. His voice was quiet. “I’m his...his Creativity. And Passion, and all that.”

“Yep.”

“I...I work with you guys. I work on stuff. I write. It’s not good, but I write.”

“Yep!”

“I sing, I act, I--” Roman huffed. “Pretty terrible at it.”

“Gonna beg to differ on that one, Princey.” Virgil smirked. “Your singing voice is really loud, but I like it.”

Roman curled, somehow, even tighter. “I--I don’t have anything else.”

“That’s okay,” Virgil said. “Do you want me to take a turn?”

“Okay.”

“Great.” Virgil leaned back against the headboard and watched the lights flicker. “You’re Roman, like you said. You’re--you’re my best friend, dude.”

Roman shuddered, just a bit.

“You’re my best friend,” Virgil repeated. “You--at first, I never liked you, ‘cause you were just...so extra, you know? So big and grand and huge. And that--that scared me. I was so scared of you back then. And I was so envious--I wanted to be like you. To not care what anyone thought. You just...put it all out there, and you were everyone’s hero, and I’d stare at you and wonder how you managed to do it.”

Virgil laughed. “And then everything changed. And then you were my friend--or at least, I hoped so. We--got along, we got to know each other, and all the stuff I didn’t get about you? All the stuff I hated, I was afraid of? It all turned out to be the best stuff. ‘Cause it’s what made you, you. It wouldn’t really work with anyone else--but since it’s all part of you, I never minded. I don’t mind.” Virgil swallowed. “You want me to tell you some stuff about that? Some stuff I’ve noticed?”

“Sure,” Roman whispered.

“Great.” Virgil looked down at Roman. “You stick out your tongue when you’re thinking, did you know that? You stick it out and you’re staring at whatever you’re working on and it’s just stupidly adorable--and! And you do this little happy dance when you’re excited, you kinda bounce from foot to foot and do a little squeal and I wish I could get excited like you do--when you’re happy, you just make everyone around you happier, you’re--” Virgil struggled for words. “You’re radiant. You’re, like--I see you, and I know--I know it’s gonna be okay. It’s gonna work out.”

Roman was shaking now. Virgil tugged him even closer and--because why not--pressed a quick kiss to the top of his head.

“And yeah, we’ve had our rough spots. Everyone has.” Virgil sighed. “And you’re--you’re gonna mess up. Maybe you’re not everything you think you’re supposed to be. Maybe you’re not gonna end up--the prince, the dreamer, or whatever. Maybe not--maybe not even the hero. And that’s okay. ‘Cause you’re still gonna be you.”

Roman’s breath hitched.

“You’re gonna be you,” Virgil continued, “and I’m gonna help you, and I’m gonna fight for you, and--and I’m gonna be brave for you, I promise--and you could be anything and that’d be true. You could be a Dark Side tomorrow. You could completely change functions. You could--you could be anything, but you’d still be Roman, and I--I’ll be here. No matter what.”

The lights skidded over the ceiling. Roman had stopped rubbing his hands on Virgil’s jacket. He was just still, still and silent and trembling like a plucked string.

“You’re Roman,” Virgil said. “And I don’t even have words for how--how freaking fantastic you are, every day--you’re--you’re my friend. You’re--so much more than that.” Virgil closed his eyes. “I love you, Ro. So much. And you might not really have everything figured out, and I definitely don’t, but--if it means anything, I know who you are, because you’re always going to be the person I love.”

And Virgil was crying. Virgil sniffed and wiped his eyes, but the choked noises didn’t stop--and he realized Roman was crying too, sobbing quietly into Virgil’s jacket. It was small cries. Quiet--too quiet, the cry of someone who’d been used to keeping it hidden.

“Oh,” Virgil said, gathering Roman in his arms and pressing his forehead to Roman’s. Tears dripped down Roman’s cheeks, and he clung to Virgil’s jacket for dear life, breath hitching. “Roman, Princey, love, it’s going to be okay, I promise--”

Roman pressed himself closer, crying, and Virgil let him stay.

“It’s going to be okay,” Virgil whispered into his hair, “you’ll figure it out. I’m here. I’ve got it covered. I promise it’s okay--you can let it out, keep crying, it’s okay--we’ll figure it out--I’m not gonna stop loving you, I’m not gonna stop looking out for you--”

Roman’s sobs grew louder and Virgil kept talking. “It’s okay,” he said, over and over again. “It’s okay, it’s okay.”

Maybe if he said it enough, Roman would believe it.

Maybe if he said it enough, Virgil would, too.

“It’s okay,” Virgil said, and meant it.

“You’re doing amazing,” Virgil said, and meant it.

“I love you,” Virgil said, and couldn’t imagine not meaning it, not being so entirely in love with Roman that it ached with it and dripped with it and filled every word. He heard it. He heard it and he heard it and he finally couldn’t hide from it--because maybe Roman could hear too, and maybe Roman would listen.

“I love you,” Virgil said, and for once he wasn’t afraid of it. “I love you so much.”

“I love you too,” was the first thing Roman said when his tears slowed. “I love you, Virgil, I love you--”

“I know,” Virgil said. And meant it. “I know, Ro, it’s okay--”

“I’m sorry,” Roman whispered.

“Don’t be.”

“I’m sorry--”

“Fine, then, I’m sorry too.” Virgil pressed his forehead to Roman’s and wiped away his tears with a hand. And he left it there, resting on Roman’s cheek, because he didn’t want to let go. “I’m sorry. And look at that--that’s okay. We can get better from here. I swear.”

Roman laughed wetly. “The Nico thing is a disaster.”

“The Nico thing is something we’ll figure out,” Virgil said. “We’ve got this. It’ll work.”

“We’re not--” Roman sighed. “We’re not ready for it, are we?”

“I’m not, and you’re not.” Virgil laughed a bit. “But, um, maybe two not-readies makes a ready?”

“Doubt it,” Roman whispered, and Virgil suddenly realized how close they were, foreheads pressed together. He could--he could move forward, just a bit, and--

“We’ll try,” Roman said, lips parting. “We’ll try, can’t we? Can’t we try? Do we--do we get that?”

“Yes,” Virgil said. “Yes, we get that, you get that--we’ll try, we’ll try and we’ll make it work somehow, I promise--”

“And if it doesn’t?” Roman’s voice was so quiet, so thin, the trail of an airplane across the stars. “What if we make things worse?”

Virgil couldn’t say he hadn’t thought of that. Obviously. Worrying was his job, and he saw the possible ramifications to everything, of course he’d thought through every possible outcome of this. And--and still.

Whatever made Roman happy, Virgil would do.

Because that always made Virgil happy, too.

“We’ll figure it out,” Virgil said. “You--you know what taking a chance is? You know what it is, to do something you want, even though it could hurt?”

“What?” Roman murmured, just a breath from Virgil’s lips.

Virgil smiled. “Bravery.”

Roman’s eyes flickered open.

They were so, so close. Lights spun around them, shadows crept away, and Virgil could--Virgil could--

“Hey,” Virgil said, barely above a whisper. “Can I--”

Roman’s eyes flickered down to Virgil’s lips and back up.

And Virgil didn’t know who moved. Maybe it was him. Maybe Roman. Maybe it didn’t matter, because they moved, and then Virgil was kissing Roman for the first time.

Okay.

Cool.

Wow.

Virgil didn’t know what he was doing--it didn’t matter, though, since he was kissing Roman--and all he could think of was how much he’d wanted this, how much he’d told himself he didn’t want this, how much he’d never wanted to cradle Roman’s face in his hands and tangle his hand in Roman’s hair and--

Virgil tangled a hand in Roman’s hair. It was exactly as good as he’d hoped.

And Roman pushed him back, against the headboard, and Roman was kissing him, and Virgil was breathless and weightless and absolutely okay with it.

Virgil could have been floating. Virgil could have been drifting in the cold night hair, among the stars, because the world was dark and filled with pinpricks of light and all he knew was warm skin under his fingers and a hand around his waist and the way Roman held him like this was all Roman had ever wanted, too--

And of course, they had to break apart, because Virgil couldn’t stay breathless--although gosh did he want to, to just lose time in Roman’s arms--

They separated.

Virgil was sure he could count every fleck of light in Roman’s eyes. A blush had settled across his cheeks, his hair was even messier than usual, and he was staring at Virgil like Virgil had hung the moon.

“Huh,” Roman said.

“Yeah,” Virgil agreed.

Roman snickered. Virgil snorted. And then they were laughing, inches apart, giggling on the bed at maybe two or three in the morning, still entangled in each other and neither moving to separate their hands.

“So,” Roman finally said, his laughing settling into a smile. “That was...okay.”

“I was okay with it,” Virgil blurted out. “Um. More than okay. And--I don’t know what it means, what you want it to mean, but--”

“It meant I like you,” Roman said. As if it was obvious. Maybe it was. “A lot. And--”

“And we want to try this,” Virgil said. “For real?”

“We can’t exactly try it for fake, can we?” Roman teased.

“We’re trying,” Virgil said. “We’re trying?”

“Yes,” Roman said. “I--I mean, we might fail, I might--”

“And then we’ll figure it out.” Virgil reached for a bit of courage, deep inside him, and found it came more naturally when Roman was pressed into him. “We’ll try it out, okay?”

Roman laughed a bit. “We’re not ready.”

“Nah, but life does that sometimes, right?” Virgil sighed. “We’re--we’ll be ready, soon enough. One day. And right now, we’ll just kind of...wing it?”

“Wing it,” Roman repeated. “A daring battle plan, emo.”

“Hey, you’re the hero here.” Virgil, despite himself, felt his lips curl in a smile. “We’ll figure it out, Princey. And--and maybe we won’t really know who we are, what we want--any of that--for a while. Maybe never again, who knows. But if I don’t take this chance, I’ll regret it.”

“So will I,” Roman said. “And--quite honestly, I’m a bit tired of regrets.”

“So let’s give it our all,” Virgil said. “We’ll never know until we try.”

“We’ll try,” Roman agreed, and placed a kiss on Virgil’s lips that tasted of salt and cinnamon. Virgil melted into it, and when they pulled away, let Roman curl up next to him. It was late. Virgil could happily fall asleep right here--and really, that wasn’t such a bad idea.

“When’s the last time you slept?” he mumbled, watching the lights dance over Roman’s face.

“Dunno,” Roman slurred, watching Virgil with soft eyes.

“Well, it’s gonna be now.” Virgil threw an arm over Roman. “Get some sleep, Princey.”

“You first.”

“What, you think I’m leaving?” Virgil snuggled closer, and Roman wrapped an arm around his waist. “Nope. You’re stuck with me.”

“Hmm.” Roman hummed to himself. “Okay with that.”

“Good, so am I.” Virgil kissed Roman’s forehead. “Come on. No talk, only sleep.”

“I love you,” Roman said, immediately breaking the rule. But Virgil couldn’t get mad. “And--I--thank you, I--”

“You’re welcome,” Virgil said. “I’d do it anytime.”

Roman smiled and closed his eyes. “You’re my hero, emo.”

And Virgil would never admit the way his heart softened.

“Thanks,” Virgil whispered. “You’re my hero, too.”

Roman was already drifting off. The floor was crowded, the door swung open, the desk was messy--and eh, whatever. They’d figure it out tomorrow. Right now, they both needed sleep, and the windows were wide to the starry sky.

“And I don’t even care,” Virgil said, “if you’re not my hero. You don’t have to be.”

He looked over at Roman, and he smiled.

“As long as you’re mine, we’re good.”

“We’re good,” Roman echoed, eyes still closed.

“We’ll be good,” Virgil agreed.

And he tried to believe it--he told himself he would believe it, he could, he deserved to--and he found, in the end, it wasn’t as hard as he thought it’d be.

They’d be good.

They’d be okay.

And they’d find their way forward.

Virgil fell asleep next to Roman, surrounded by drifting lights and warm shadows, and there was nowhere else he’d rather be.

General taglist (ask to be included or removed!):

@the17thmeatball

@most-likely-fandom

@csi-baker-street-babes

@caffeinated-cryptid

@thefivecalls

@ollyollyoxinfree

@the-gay-is-back

@dramaticsnakes

@stoicpanther

@chaospersonified

@thatoneloudowl

@jungle321jungle

@mistythegirlfluxmess

@k1ngtok1

@joylessnightsky

@elizabutgayer

@ohheavenlylord

#sanders sides #roman sanders #virgil sanders #prinxiety #romantic prinxiety #i banged ninety-five percent of this out this evening #djkhgfds i'm so tired but i wanted to get at least one WIP out of the way #anyway take care of urself yall don't write 8k in one sitting #averywrites

499 notes · View notes

the-sympathetic-villain · 4 years

Text

You Belong With Me - Chapter 9

AO3 | First | Previous | Next | Masterpost

Description: Much to his surprise, after being released from prison for a crime he didn’t commit, Logan has been appointed as a the prince’s new advisor.

Word Count: 6371

Author’s Note: This chapter gets pretty dark so be careful and check the tags, if you need to! Also, if you want to skip the darker subject matter, just skip he middle section. There are breaks between the sections and there’s enough context afterwards for you to be able to get the idea without having to read it. Enjoy the long chapter ;)

Chapter Warnings: Anxiety, Trauma Responses, Nightmares, Imprisonment, Panic Attack, Self-deprecation, Accidental Self-Harm, Swearing, Control/Abuse, Violence, Weapon/Knife, Stabbing (If I missed anything, please let me know!)

Tingling chills crept up Logan’s neck as Virgil slowly leaned away from him with a blank look on his face. Logan felt a sinking feeling in his chest as he waited for Virgil to respond. He nervously tapped his fingers on his leg as he considered the possibility that Virgil didn't believe him.

“I know it's-"

Virgil raised his hand, indicating for Logan to stop talking. He stood up from the sofa, moving to the fireplace. Gripping the mantel with one hand, he covered his eyes with his other hand, gently putting pressure on his temples.

Logan felt an eternity pass as Virgil stood unmoving at the fireplace. Logan’s throat and chest burned from tension as he waited for Virgil to speak. Every cell in his body ached to justify his accusation but Logan held his tongue, biting back the urge to push Virgil. If Virgil didn’t believe him, he hardly wanted to make the consequences worse for himself.

Finally, Virgil turned around to look at him with a serious expression. Logan's eyes flicked to the door, yearning to be anywhere else than on the receiving end of Virgil’s intense stare. He swallowed, tearing his gaze away from the door, knowing full well that Virgil was faster and stronger than him. He was trapped. Logan closed his eyes, bracing himself for Virgil's response.

“You’re absolutely sure?”

Logan's breath caught in his throat as he looked up at Virgil. He cautiously searched Virgil’s face but his face was calm. Logan couldn’t sense any malicious intent in Virgil’s inquiry. Still, Logan hesitated before he spoke again. “There’s no doubt in my mind.”

Virgil looked out to the window on the far end of Logan's suite. “We have to tell Roman.”

“Wait—" Logan protested.

“L, I understand your reasons for not wanting to tell him but his life is at risk if he doesn't know. You have to understand that already.” Virgil’s voice was firm but not unkind. Logan’s anxiety eased a small amount, knowing Virgil seemed to believe him.

“Of course, I understand.” Logan exhaled, defeated. “But Virgil, it's my word against Remus'. I don't know Roman as well as you, so forgive me if I'm wrong, but Roman’s reactions to my treatment have been quite emotional.”

Virgil was quiet, lost in thought as he listened to Logan.

Logan took a breath. He spoke with more confidence as his unease starting to settle. “I don't wish to be misinterpreted. I appreciate that Roman cares enough to be upset on my behalf, but I can only assume telling him that his brother was responsible for my suffering would illicit an even more extreme emotional response.”

Virgil crossed his arms, leaning against the wall behind him. “That's not an unfair assumption of how princey would react.”

“Roman’s already under scrutiny for how he's handled my situation. By some miracle, Roman saw through Remus’ façade and believes my innocence, but many people still believe I'm guilty. They believe that I am part of some greater conspiracy to manipulate Roman, and that Roman's naïve for believing otherwise.” Logan paused. “If Roman reacts rashly, it will only serve to confirm people’s suspicions that I'm somehow influencing him. I don't want to know what could happen if people start to lose faith in Roman, and I don't want to give Remus the opportunity to take advantage of Roman’s good nature, Vee.”

“You’re right. We need to be tactful about how we share this information with him or he could go totally off script.” Logan watched as Virgil started to pace back and forth across the room. “Roman hates his brother already. Even I can't even predict how he'll react, but we can't hide this from him. He needs to know, in case Remus decides to try again.”

“I know.” Logan murmured, watching Virgil from the couch. He could hear the hiss of the gas lamp and he watched Virgil silently pace the room.

Slowing, Virgil moved over to the window, interlacing his fingers and resting his fingers against his lips in a hushing gesture. Deep in thought, he silently gazed out the window, moonlight filtering down on his face. “I know a way to confine princey until we can talk him down.”

Logan raised an eyebrow. “How do you intend to manage that?”

“I have to call in a favor.”

“That is unhelpfully vague.”

“You’re just going to have to trust me on this one, L.” Virgil exhaled.

"I guess that's the least I owe you. You are trusting me on this whole matter.” Logan leaned back, resigned. He exhaled and his eyes drifted up to meet Virgil’s. “Thank you for believing me, Vee. I am aware that this is a lot to accept from someone you only recently met.”

Virgil shrugged. “Honestly, it's not as much of a stretch of the imagination as you might think. Roman's no stranger to Remus’ cruelty, and it's no secret to me. It's only hard to believe he'd actually be bold enough to actually try to kill his own brother.”

Logan sighed, exhausted. “I didn’t even realize he was the Roman’s brother.”

“You didn't know?” Virgil turned to lean his shoulder against the wall, giving Logan a confused look.

Logan shook his head tiredly. His eyes were distant as he stared down at the ground. “Not until yesterday.”

Virgil didn't respond, quietly staring at Logan sitting on the couch. “L?”

Logan looked up at him.

“I know you don't want to hear this but you should probably get some rest. It's late.”

Logan sighed. “I know. I don't think I can sleep though.”

“That's the adrenaline talking. You’re exhausted. When was the last time you really slept?”

“I slept this afternoon."

“No, you didn't.”

Logan looked up at him in confusion.

“Your door was cracked open when I left this afternoon. I don't know how long you were listening to Roman and I but you weren’t sleeping.”

Logan’s face flushed. “I'm sorry. I-"

“It's fine, L. Relax. I'm not mad.” Virgil interrupted him. “It was nothing I wouldn’t have said to your face. Don't make a habit of it but, this time, I'll give you a pass. I can't blame you for wanting be certain that we weren’t deceiving you.”

Logan sighed, looking up at Virgil apologetically. “I’m glad I didn't upset you, but regardless, I apologize. I'm asking you to trust me, and yet, I clearly wasn't able to do the same.”

“Seriously, L. It's fine. I would have done the same thing.” Virgil leaned back against the wall. “My point was that you didn’t sleep.”

“I slept some.”

Virgil raised his eyebrow skeptically. “More than a couple hours?”

Logan hesitated, glancing up at Virgil, but decided to be honest. “Probably not.”

Virgil’s eyes narrowed in on him. “When's the last time you slept more than a few hours, L?”

“I don't know.” Logan admitted sadly.

“Go to bed. Table the issue until tomorrow, okay?”

Logan nodded, smiling at Virgil as he reluctantly moved to his room. He paused outside his bedroom door, fidgeting for a moment before glancing back at Virgil. “Uh, thanks for looking out for me, Vee.”

“Someone's got to do it. It may as well be me.” Virgil smirked over at Logan for a moment before his face softened into a smile. “Seriously though, I'm glad to do it. Don't worry.”

Logan smiled over his shoulder before slipping into his room. Once inside, he wandered to the bed and slid under the heavy blankets. Exhaustion settled over him as he pulled the blankets up, letting the dense blanket weigh him down. Sleep claimed him moments later.

Logan wiped the dust from his eyes as he pushed himself off the ground. His heart sank at the sound of metal restraints moving with him. Groaning, he laid his back against the cold, stone wall behind him, glancing anxiously around the cell. Moonlight filtered into his cell through the window high above him, casting an eerie light in the space around him. Logan inhaled sharply, clenching his eyes shut and trying to quell the panic welling in his chest. He buried his head in his arms, trying to keep his breath steady.

It's only a nightmare. All you have to do wake up.

A few minutes passed and he wrapped his arms around his chest, digging his fingernails into his skin.

Why am I so useless? I can't even do something as simple as wake myself up.

A loud breath escaped him as he stifled a sob, burying his head in his arms. Waves of panic wracked his body as he willed himself to wake.

It's too real. Something’s wrong.

The cell only seemed to solidify around him as he dug his nails deeper into his arms.

No. Please no…I can’t—

He was jolted back to awareness as a distant noise from down the hall startled him. Logan’s muscles tensed as he heard movement coming towards him down the hall. He jumped up, scrambling across the floor to the far side of the cell, lifting his chains to avoid making noise. Curling up behind the cot, he tried to shrink himself out of sight into the shadows. He took a deep breath.

It's just a nightmare.

The voices continued down the hall and despite his best attempts, he couldn't make out who was speaking. He leaned forward, straining to hear, but he refused to move closer to the cell door.

Frustrated, he gave up and curled up tight against the wall as darkness crept in around him. Logan started to shake with anticipation of what that night would bring.

Stop panicking. It's just a nightmare.

He begged himself to believe it but he could feel his resolve weakening. This didn't feel like his other nightmares. This felt too real.

Something’s wrong. I need to wake up. Stop being so stupid. Just wake up, you useless—

Logan stopped in his tracks as he spotted movement in the corner of his eye. An unusual, amber light began dance against the wall outside the metal bars of the cell door. Logan could hear indistinct voices coming down the hall towards him. Logan bit back a panicked whimper as he cowered back into the shadows.

No. Please, no…Just wake up, you idiot—

Logan's breathing became rapid and shallow. The flickering, amber light grew brighter, illuminating the entire room in a soft glow.

Logan forced himself to breathe normally, counting in his head like Virgil had showed him. When he finally regained his composure, he peeked his head out above the cot, trying to determine of the source of the bright light. Another wave of panic racked his body as he imagined that the tower may have caught fire but he dismissed the idea. He reasoned to himself that the room would be filled with smoke, if that were the case.

Logan stood slowly, hesitating as he crept to the door. Memories flooded his mind as he crept silently across the room, but before he could even reach the door, his chains jerked him back. He looked down at the taut chain restraining him to the wall. His panic gave way to frustration and he pulled manically at the shackles until they cut deep into his wrists, not caring if the loud noise brought him unwanted attention anymore. Tears welled in his eyes as he stifled another sob, falling to his knees.

What the hell is happening?

A yell was ripped from his body a hand grabbed him painfully from behind, spinning him around. Logan stumbled back, trembling as Remus’ face popped out of the shadows. A threatening smile stretched across his face as he lunged at Logan.

Instinctively, Logan jerked back but his restraints stopped him midstep, causing him to stumble and hit the ground hard.

Nonononononono…It's just a night—

“Oh no, pretty boy. It's not a nightmare.” Remus interrupted his thought, chuckling coldly as he approached Logan. “Not yet.”

Logan tried to scramble to his feet but Remus jabbed his foot into Logan’s shoulder, forcing him to cringe in pain as he was pushed back down to the ground. Remus stepped on the chain connecting Logan's hands, pinning them to the ground above his head. He squirmed, feeling vulnerable but Remus held him effortlessly.

"You’ll stay down, if you know what's good for you. You've caused enough problems already my little pest.” A chill swept through his body at the threat in Remus' whisper. Logan forced his body go limp, relenting to Remus' control.

“Good boy.” Remus' sick smile made Logan's stomach turn. He moved his foot off Logan’s chains, knowing he wouldn’t have to tell Logan twice. The amber light around them began to flicker chaotically as Logan curled up in a ball on the ground, shaking.

“So, pretty boy. I truly made a big oopsie. Didn't I?”

Remus' upbeat tone made Logan's stomach turn. He closed his eyes, willing himself to be anywhere else.

“I underestimated my idiot brother's tendency to take in strays. I really should have known he couldn't resist someone as pathetic as you.” Remus crouched next to Logan, smiling as he flinched away. “Still, I thought you knew better. A few days with Roman is all it took to ruin all the progress we made. Suddenly, it’s like you think you get to fight back.”

Logan remained limp on the floor, not daring even to breathe.

Remus smirked at him, rising back to his feet. He tipped Logan onto his back with his foot, smiling cruelly down at Logan as he loomed over him. Before Logan could react, Remus stepped on Logan’s chest, his boot digging into the bottom of Logan’s ribcage, resting all of his weight onto his sternum. Logan yelped, struggling to breathe.

“Answer me, pretty boy.”

“What?” Logan squeaked.

Remus’ ankle dug in deeper and Logan whimpered. “Do you feel like you can fight back?”

“No,” Logan wheezed.

“No, what, my little pest? I trained you better than that.” Remus stared down at Logan, the light flickering chaotically in his eyes. A demented smiled crept across his face.

“No, sir.” Logan spat out.

“Oh…no, no, no… that won't do anymore.” Remus giggled manically slid his boot up to Logan's throat. “You know who I am now, pretty boy. You'll refer to me as ‘your highness’.”

“No, your highness.” Logan wheezed, gasping for breath.

Remus held his foot down, smiling at Logan’s compliance. It seemed like an eternity passed before Remus stepped off his throat, allowing him to breath. Logan curled up on his side, gasping for air. Orange and red lights danced around the edge of his vision like flames in a fire.

Logan felt Remus push him down onto his stomach and kneel in front of him. He groaned as Remus grabbed a handful of his hair, pulling his head up to look at him.

“Alright, my pest. Let's get down to the juicy stuff.” Logan cringed at the serious look on Remus' face. “I need to know if you've told my brother anything about our late night meetings.”

“No,” Logan muttered. “He knows nothing.”

“Try again.” Remus commanded, tightening his grip on Logan's hair. He choked back a whimper.

“No, your highness. He knows nothing.” Logan repeated, bitterly glaring up at Remus.

“Good boy.” He leaned down close to Logan's face. “Now, did you tell anyone else?”

Anxiety spiked in Logan’s chest but he shoved it down, trying not to let it show. He spoke as calmly as he could manage. “No. You’re highness. I told no one else.”

"Tsk, tsk, pretty boy.” Remus released his grip on Logan’s hair, shaking his finger at him.

Logan flinched at the scowl on Remus' face.

“I thought I taught you not to lie. Funny, a few days is all it took to ruin you.” Remus pushed Logan onto his side and stood up. Logan tracked Remus' movement in his periphery. He barely managed to brace himself before Remus turned around, plunging his foot into Logan’s stomach, knocking the air out of his lungs.

“Listen here, pretty boy. You know you don't belong in this world. Your not strong enough to play with the big boys.” He leaned over Logan as he glared up at Remus. He crouched down, grabbing Logan’s face and holding him still even as he tried to wince away. “My brother can't keep you safe forever.”

Logan was quiet, refusing to meet Remus’ gaze.

Remus laughed, pushing Logan’s face away. “All the same, I'm feeling generous today. I'm going to do a good thing for you. Would you like that?”

“Yes, your highness. I would like that.” Logan’s words were empty as he sank back down to the ground but he gave the answer he knew Remus wanted.

“Good boy. Now, listen closely.” Remus kneeled down on one knee behind Logan’s head. He gripped Logan’s shoulder, pulling it to the ground so Logan lay flat on his back again.

“If you keep our meetings a secret from my brother, I'll leave you alone. As much as I enjoy our time together,” Logan’s skin crawled as Remus ran his hand up his jaw. “I'm willing to give it up for some peace of mind. You can live your new life. Do whatever you want with my idiot brother. I'll leave you alone. All you have to do is keep my secret. How does that sound, pretty boy?”

“I would like that, your highness.” Logan spat out an automatic response, but his mind raced at the implications of Remus' suggestion.

Rems frowned. His voice turned to a menacing growl. “I hear a bit of hesitation in your voice, my little pest. So, let's talk about what happens if you’re not as cooperative as I know you will be.”

Remus reached to his waistband and drew a long, sharp dagger from its sheath. The lights danced on the silver blade and red light reflected in Remus' eyes as he flashed a deranged smile down at Logan. Remus dashed towards him and Logan tried to scramble away, but he wasn’t fast enough. Remus slammed on top of him, pinning his shoulders down with his knees. Logan tried to squirm away, but Remus held him down, leaning over him. Logan held his breath as he felt Remus press the blade against his throat. “If my dear brother catches wind of our relationship, I will take you from him in the dead of night. I will hide you away where he will never find you and I will make you will regret existing. Do you understand?”

“Yes, your highness. I understand.” Logan wheezed, feeling the cold metal on his throat.

“Good, pretty boy.”

The flickering light at the periphery of Logan's vision brightened. Logan squirmed as he realized the edges of the room had caught fire. Without warning, the whole room erupted in flame as Logan struggled under Remus' weight but he was trapped, unable to shake him off. He looked up at Remus. His pupils glowed red and he smiled maniacally down at Logan. Logan panicked, fighting to get away.

“Just one more reminder of what’s at stake,” Remus giggled wildly, plunging his dagger into Logan's shoulder.

Logan cried out. His vision blurred, flames flickering on the edge of his periphery

“Goodbye for now, pretty boy. Keep our deal and you won't have to come back here. Choose to fight me, and you’ll be back here soon.” Remus twisted the blade in Logan's shoulder. Logan screamed, his vision fading to black.

Logan woke screaming, drenched in sweat. He flung himself forward, suddenly free of Remus's weight. Thunder crashed above him, shaking the room. He flinched, covering his head, as Virgil burst through the door of his room. Scanning the room, Virgil realized what was happening.

“It's okay, Logan. You’re awake. You’re safe.” Virgil jumped up onto the bed, pulling Logan into a tight embrace, trying to stop him from hurting himself in his panic.

Logan slowly started to recognize his surroundings, his panic dissipating. Seeing Virgil didn't startle him as much this time. Instead, feeling his arms wrapped around him brought a sense of relief. The adrenaline was fading from his body and he collapsed from exhaustion into Virgil’s warmth. Virgil sat holding him until his breathing slowly returned to normal.

“Jeez, L.” Virgil rubbed his shoulder. “That was a lot more intense than last night.”

“It-it wasn't a d-dream.” Logan managed to stutter.

“Of course it was, L. It wasn’t real. It's okay now. You’re safe.”

“No.” He replied, his voice steadying. He pulled back from Virgil, leaning his head back against the headboard. “I've had nightmares since I was a kid, Vee. That wasn't a nightmare. That was… something worse.”

“What do you mean?” Virgil looked at him skeptically.

Logan folded his arms in his lap, silently trying to find the words to explain his experience. A flash of lightning illuminated the room and thunder roared in the distance as he processed what happened. He’d only just turned to Virgil to speak again when his shoulder started to burn, pain shooting across his chest. Logan groaned, clenching his teeth as he doubled over in pain.

“What's going on, L?” Virgil asked, panicked. Logan curled up in pain for several more seconds, leaning into Virgil shoulder. Unsure of what else to do, Virgil wrapped his arms around Logan gently.

“Logan. What's going?” Virgil whispered, panicked. He put his hand on Logan’s shoulder and he cried out in pain at the contact. Lightning lit up the room as Logan looked up at Virgil and a look of shock flashed across Virgil’s face. “Logan?! What—”

Logan exhaled as the pain faded to a dull ache. He collapsed into Virgil’s shoulder, closing his eyes as Virgil wrapped his arms tighter around him.

“I-I'm okay. The pain is easing.” Logan breathed. He sank further into the bed, exhausted.

“B-but—what—” Virgil stuttered manically glancing down at Logan. He shook his head, rubbing his eyes. “Great, now I'm seeing shit.”

Virgil frowned when Logan didn't even move. He leaned down to get a look at Logan’s face. “L? What just happened? Are you okay?”

Logan shook his head tiredly. Virgil watched in horror as he pulled down the neck of his shirt, exposing his shoulder. A large, dark bruise had formed just to the side of his collarbone. The skin around the bruise was irritated, red and warm to the touch.

“What the hell?!” Virgil gently reached over, placing his hand on Logan’s wound. Logan winced but leaned closer to Virgil.

“That solidifies my conclusion that it wasn't a dream.” Logan whispered, his eyelids drooping.

“I need you to stay awake, L.” Virgil guided Logan’s face up to look at him. “What’s going on? You’re freaking me out.”

Logan looked up at him tiredly. “It started like a dream. I was back in the dungeon, but everything was wrong. Nothing felt right.” Virgil could feel Logan quaking in his arms. “Remus appeared behind me. He knocked me to the ground and…” Logan shuddered and trailed off.

“This still sounds like a dream, L.” Virgil whispered softly. His heart pained for his friend.

“No, it was different.” A pained breath escaped him. “Remus spoke to me. The way he talked… it's like he knew we were in a dream.”

“He talked to you?” Virgil’s expression shifted but Logan was too exhausted to keep looking up at him.

Logan nodded. “The bruise. He…he stabbed my shoulder, and he twisted—"

Virgil wrapped his arms tight around him, pulling Logan’s head to his chest. “Shit, Logan. It's okay. You’re safe now. I've got you.”

Logan exhaled, exhausted. “We have a problem, Vee. Remus made it clear that if I tell Roman that he's responsible for what happened to me, he’ll take me from you guys. He’ll—” Logan curled closer to Virgil, tears in his eyes.

“I won't let him take you, L.” Virgil replied, fury in his voice.

Logan smiled at him for a moment, before his face dropped, defeated. “Virgil, he’s in my dreams. If he can keep me from sleeping, that alone could kill me.”

Virgil sat silently for a moment, running a hand through Logan's hair. He sighed, reaching into his shirt and pulling out a small, brass amulet on a long chain. He pulled it off and slipped it around Logan’s neck. Logan looked down at it, confused. The stone in the center was translucent with wisps of black. “Take it for now. It'll block some of the bad energy.”

Logan raised his eyebrow tiredly, as he examined the amulet. “What is it?”

“It's a dispelling charm. It scrambles your energy and makes you more difficult to find and blocks any negative energy headed your way.”

“That doesn’t make sense. Stones are inanimate objects. They don't create or dispel energy.” Logan mumbled into Virgil’s shirt.

Virgil rolled his eyes, smiling playfully. “You were just assaulted in your sleep and you're going to debate me on this?”

Logan smiled.

Virgil relaxed, smiling down at Logan. “Listen, I think I know someone who can help. Are you okay enough to take a walk?”

Logan yawned, barely nodding. “I think I can manage.”

Virgil looked at him skeptically, watching Logan struggle to keep his eyes open. “Good enough. Get up. Grab your jacket. I'll be right back.”

“Wait, Virge—Don’t leave me—" Logan protested, anxiously grabbing at Virgil’s sleeve.

Virgil’s heart broke at the sad tone of Logan's voice. He rubbed Logan’s shoulder. “Hey, it's okay, L. I'm not going far. I'm just going to call the guards in the hall to escort us. Come on. Get up.” He nudged Logan towards the edge of the bed until Logan reluctantly stood up.

Virgil waited until Logan walked over to his closet before he left the room, glancing nervously back at Logan as he slipped through the door.

Logan pulled his coat out of his closet, but he turned to the bed too quickly. He staggered and nearly fell. Steadying himself, he moved over and leaned on the side of the bed until his legs felt stable again. He groaned. His chest ached from the bruises as he lifted up his coat, barely managing to pull his jacket on as Virgil returned.

“Are you ready?”

“I think so.” He said, pushing up of the bed . Suddenly dizzy, he stumbled, nearly falling into the wall.

“Easy, easy. Don't rush. L. Put your arm around my shoulder.” Virgil rushed over to help him. He wrapped a hand around Logan’s waist, careful to avoid his injured shoulder. Patiently, he waited as Logan adjusted until he felt comfortable.

“I'm good. Thanks, Vee.”

“Okay, carefully now. Let’s go.” Virgil led him through his chambers to the main door.

Stepping out, Virgil held Logan up while he locked the door behind them. Logan looked up nervously at the two armed guards standing on either side of the door, towering over them.

Feeling vulnerable, Logan leaned into Virgil. An uneasy breath escaped him.

Virgil turned to him. His eyes flicked between Logan and the guards before settling back on Logan. “You’re okay, L. I've got you. Nothing’s going to happen.”

“Okay." Logan replied weakly.

“Come on. We got a long way to go.” Virgil said softly, before nodding at the guards. They took positions in front of and behind them and followed as they proceeded slowly down the corridor. Thunder echoed around them and lightning illuminated the dimly lit halls. Logan snuck a glance out one of the windows as they walked. The window glowed with a soft light and could see the moon peeking through the storm clouds outside. Logan’s heart dropped at the sight of the moon still hanging high in the sky.

“I must not have been out for long.” Logan thought out loud.

“Two hours, maybe. You definitely didn’t sleep long enough.”

Logan moaned and his speech started to slur. “I don’t know how long I can keep goin’, if I don’t sleep soon.”

“You’re going to sleep tonight, L. We're getting you help. Now, hush. Save your energy. We'll talk when we get there.” Virgil sighed, unnerved by how fast Logan was fading.

“Where’re we going?”

“You'll find out when we get there, okay?”

“’Kay, Vee. I trus’ you.” His words slurred with exhaustion.

“Save your strength, L. We're almost there.”

They approached a set of double doors Logan recognized. “Are we—"

Virgil hushed him. “Later, L."

The guard in front of them opened the door for him. Virgil led him into the courtyard. Virgil turned briefly to the guards. “You’re dismissed. Return to your posts.”

Exchanging confused glances, the guards nodded at Virgil. Logan sighed with relief as they turned to leave. They closed the doors to the castle, leaving Virgil and Logan alone outside the castle. Virgil pulled up his hood before helping Logan adjust his own. Logan looked down to the wet ground, his vision swimming as he tried to watch as the raindrops struck the puddles below them. Virgil led Logan through the rain, around the edge of the courtyard, keeping to the shadows. They moved slowly, making every effort to stay out of sight. Logan’s eyes drifted up, focusing, as he recognized the path they were following.

“Are we goin' to see Patton?” Logan asked, confused.

“You know Patton?”

"Met him earlier. Pat's nice. He doesn't hate me.”

“What?” Virgil cocked his head in confusion.

“He doesn't hate me, like mos' people. ‘Cause they think I tried t'kill Roman.” Logan said, slurring and stumbling over as he nearly lost consciousness.

Virgil lunged forward to catch him, accidentally grabbing Logan’s wound.

Logan whimpered softly.

Virgil eased his grip apologetically. “I'm sorry, L. We’re almost there.”

“Why'd we leave the guards, Vee? I don't understand why we did that.” Logan asked. His eyes drooped, unfocused.

“Because I want as few people as possible to know where you are, L. For your sake and Patton’s.”

“Oh, ‘dat makes sense. You’re smart.” Logan mumbled, closing his eyes.

“Okay, stop talking, L. You need to save your energy.”

“Oh…” Logan made a disappointed noise. “I'm bein’ annoyin’.”

“What?” Virgil looked down at him. “No, you’re not being annoying. I just don’t want you to pass out.”

“It’s okay.” Logan slurred. “Sometimes, I get excited an' I talk too much. People don't wanna listen to me ‘cause it's annoying.”

Virgil couldn’t help holding Logan tighter as he helped him up the stairs. “I like hearing you talk, Logan. It’s not annoying. I just don't want you to accidentally hurt yourself.”

Logan quietly leaned into Virgil’s shoulder.

“You good?”

Logan nodded.

“Okay.” Virgil turned and pounded on the door, holding Logan up as he waited. “Patton, open up!”

A few moments later, the door slowly opened and a sleepy Patton looked out at them, rubbing his eyes tiredly. “Virgil? What's going on?”

“Patton, I need your help.” Virgil pleaded.

Patton looked down, eyes widening as he noticed at Logan fading in and out of consciousness. Suddenly awake, he rushed to Logan’s other side to help Virgil carry him inside.

“Careful, Pat. His shoulder's injured.” Virgil warned, as Patton approached Logan's other side.

Patton's face filled with concern, but he nodded at Virgil as he gently slipped under Logan's arm. He wrapped an arm around Logan’s waist as they helped him through the door.

The small house was quiet. Virgil glanced over at the small fire crackling in the fireplace, illuminating the room in a warm glow. It would have felt cozy, if it hadn't been for the half-conscious friend he had hanging at his side. Logan murmured incoherently as they carried him across the room.

“Okay." Patton gripped him gently. “Come on, kiddo. Let’s get you in the bed, ‘kay?”

“Uh… huh.” Logan muttered. His eyes fluttering closed.

Virgil lightly jostled him. “Stay awake for a little longer, L.”

“‘Kay, Vee. I'll try.” Logan muttered, barely audible.

Patton and Virgil carefully helped Logan onto the bed, laying him down gently. Virgil sat on the bed next to him, making sure Logan stayed awake.

“What happened, Virgil?” Patton hissed at him, distressed.

"I'll explain soon. I promise." Virgil held his hands up in surrender. “But first, is your house warded?”

Patton stopped in his tracks, taken aback. “Well, yeah. Just basic stuff but it's protected.”

“Now's the time to drop whatever you've got, Pat. Make your house a fortress.”

“What? Why?” He looked at Virgil, confused. “What am I even warding against?”

“Astral projection. Psychic attack. Whatever it takes to keep them out of Logan's head.”

“Them who, Virge?” Patton splurted, exasperated.

Virgil smiled sympathetically at him. “Pat, I promise I’ll explain once we’re safe.”

Patton groaned in frustration but he turned to his desk, digging through the drawers. “Fine. Grab the dried sage off the mantel. Burn it in here. That'll give me a buffer to set things up.”

Virgil nodded and quickly set to work unwrapping one of the packages of dried herbs. He pulled out a small handful of sage, breaking it into pieces and dropping them into the small cast iron bowl that Patton had indicated. He lit the herb, gently blowing on it until it smoldered and smoke billowed out.

Once the sage was lit, he turned to watch Patton work, occasionally sneaking glances at Logan to make sure he was still awake. Virgil watched silently as Patton kneeled next to the bed and pulled out a large, metal box from under his bed. He didn't miss the sad look that fell over Patton's face as Logan mumbled into the sheets of the bed as Patton moved around him. Virgil smiled sadly as Patton reluctantly tore his gaze from Logan to flip open the box. Recovering his focus, Patton dug through the box of charms, pulling some out of the box and shoving it back under the bed. He started to wander the edge of the room, hanging charms as he went and muttering incantations under his breath.

Patton barely had the last incantation out of his mouth as he turned to Virgil with a deathly glare on his face. “Explain. Now.”

Virgil shrunk back. He knew Patton wasn't angry at him. He was only upset at Logan’s current condition, but Patton had a way of reducing him to feeling like a petulant child. “Almost, Pat. I have another favor to ask.”

Virgil flinched as Patton continued to glare at him.

“Is there a way to get Logan to sleep without dreaming?”

“What?” Patton’s anger faded to a confused look.

“You heard me right, Pat. I want to keep him from dreaming tonight. I promise this is the last thing I'll ask of you before I explain what's going on.” Virgil glanced over at Logan, struggling to stay awake on the bed. It worried him that Logan hadn't even looked up at them as they talked about him. “Please, let's get him to sleep and I'll tell you everything.”

Patton stared at Virgil, frustrated, but his expression softened as he looked over at Logan. Patton sighed. “Fine. Yes, I can do that. Grab the valerian root off the shelf behind you and bring it here. Patton pulled out a small mortar and pestle out from his desk drawer. Virgil watched over his shoulder as Patton ground up the valerian root and mixed with a variety of other herbs and oils. Virgil thought he saw lavender and maybe rose petals but the rest of the herbs were a mystery to him. A sweet floral scent drifted up from the table as he watched Patton continue working diligently until the mixture formed a fine paste.

“That smells good." Virgil commented offhandedly.

“Yeah, it doesn't taste great though, so hopefully he can keep it down.” Patton moved to sit on the bed next to Logan. “Alright, Lo, you're going to have to sit up.”

Logan nodded. Virgil moved over to the bed, helping him up to a sitting position. He leaned into Virgil’s chest to stay upright.

Patton held his fingers on Logan’s neck, checking his pulse. Seemingly satisfied, he held a hand to his briefly to Logan’s forehead, looking him right in the eyes, which were partially glazed over.

“Lo, focus on me. ‘Kay, kiddo?”

Logan nodded tiredly, turning his head in Patton’s direction.

“Good, kiddo. I'm going to put a spoonful of this in your mouth and you’re going to hold it under your tongue.” He waited for Logan to nod before continuing. “It's going to taste really bad but you have to keep it in your mouth. It's going to help you sleep. Once it's under your tongue, count to sixty and then swallow it, okay?”

Logan nodded. Patton took a spoonful of the mixture and held it out to him. Logan obediently put it in his mouth. Immediately, he looked like he might gag.

“Don't spit it out.” Patton warned.

Logan nodded back, reluctantly.

“Good job, Lo. Keep it under your tongue and count to sixty.” He smiled encouragingly.

Logan’s face scrunched as he counted. The minute seemed to last an eternity but eventually Patton nodded to indicate he can swallow. Patton was waiting with a glass of water when he was finished and Logan downed the glass in one go, aching to get the taste out of his mouth.

“You did good, kiddo. Now, we're going to lay you down. It should kick in soon. Okay?”

Logan nodded tiredly as Virgil gently laid him back on the pillow. Patton pulled the blanket up around him and tucked him in tightly. His eyes dropped shut and a few minutes later, they could hear a gentle breathing as Logan finally slept.

“He's okay. Right, Pat?” Virgil asked, distracted. “He wasn't this disoriented when he woke up earlier. I know he hasn't been sleeping but—”

“You’re stalling, kiddo.” Patton interrupted impatiently, but he decided to set Virgil’s anxiety at ease anyway. “He's okay. His breathing and his pulse are strong and steady and he doesn't have a fever. I think he's just exhausted, Virgil.”

Virgil frowned, watching the rise and fall of Logan’s chest.

Patton turned to him, crossing his arms. “Time to explain, Virgil.”

“Okay, Pat. Come over here. I'll tell you what I know.”

You Belong With Me Taglist: @cas-is-a-hunter @insert-cool-blogname@ironwoman359 @i-know-im-smart @imbadatnames8d @optimistic-violinist @somehow-i-got-an-account @croftersphoenix @dwbh888

#sanders sides #sanders sides fic #thomas sanders #ts #ts logan #ts virgil #ts remus #unsympathetic remus #ts patton #platonic analogical #platonic moxiety #platonic logicality #tw knife #tw injury #tw abuse #You Belong With Me #villain writes

91 notes · View notes

oliviaischillin1204 · 4 years

Text

a stupid bet

Pairings: Romantic Prinxiety

Word Count: 2,139

Warnings: Character Thomas

this is kinda a weird one! it was originally gonna be part of my t2eb series for the “holding it in” prompt, but it very quickly got out of hand lmao. it’s not a trope/premise i normally play with, but i think i did an alright job!

This was all Roman’s stupid fault.

Well, Virgil begrudgingly reasoned, it was his own stupid fault, too. When Roman made the suggestion, he could have said no. He could have told him he wasn’t comfortable with it, or that it was too embarrassing, or he didn’t want to risk the others noticing. But if he was being honest… he was kind of excited to try it.

“If you need it to stop immediately, scratch your nose,” Roman repeated, strapping the belt-like device he’d created around Virgil’s waist.

“I know.” As soon as Roman pulled his hands away, Virgil pulled down his shirt and hoodie. The belt was snug, and it fit perfectly around Virgil’s waist, although it was also connected to a few padded squares that reached down to his belly and up to his ribs.

Roman stepped back, looking him up and down. “Completely undetectable.”

Virgil opened his mouth to respond, but suddenly felt the familiar pull in his spine that meant he was being summoned. From the way Roman jerked slightly, he felt it, too.

The two looked at each other, nervous smiles inexplicably rising on their faces.

“Are you sure about this?” Roman asked once more. Virgil exhaled slowly before nodding.

“Let’s do it.” And with that, the two sunk out to join the others in the living room.

Thankfully, Thomas’ current issue really had nothing to do with either of them: he was having another heart-versus-mind crisis, so all Roman and Virgil needed to do was occasionally offer input on Logan and Patton’s debate.

Virgil tried to pay attention, but the feeling of the belt rubbing against his skin kept pulling his focus away from the video they were recording. He watched Roman out of the corner of his eye, but the creative side seemed fully ingrossed in the conflict.

Virgil frowned a little. Had he forgotten about their game? Did he not want to do it anymore? He felt doubts starting to pile up in his head, until-

“Virgil? What do you think?”

His gaze snapped back to Thomas, who was looking at him expectantly.

“I-”

Virgil gasped, barely turning it into a cough at the last second. He felt something pulsing against his stomach- a light touch, like someone was merely rubbing the skin, but it was enough to distract him for just a beat too long.

“I think this whole argument is pointless anyway,” he finally spat out. The vague answer seemed to satisfy the others, as they continued their conversation. Virgil peeked back at Roman, who wasn’t looking at him. His gaze fell to Roman’s hand, which was shoved casually into his pants pocket.

His pocket. Where the remote that controlled the belt was located.

Virgil inhaled sharply. Okay. So they were really doing this.

As if on cue, the sensations on Virgil’s torso increased just slightly: there were now two sections of the belt gently buzzing against his skin, one on his tummy and one on his waistline.

Virgil shoved his hands into his pockets, hoping to hide the way he was clenching his fists. It felt… weird, really weird; he could tell Roman was experimenting with all of the different features, considering the way the sensations kept changing. It kinda felt like when Roman would dig his fingers into Virgil’s body, but there was also a slight vibrating feeling, like a less concentrated version of an electric toothbrush.

The feelings were distracting enough on their own, but the knowledge that Virgil couldn’t smile, laugh, squirm, or otherwise react without drawing the attention of the others (or worse, the audience) made them so much harder to ignore.

The conversation continued around and around, and Virgil couldn’t find any rhyme or reason in how Roman was controlling the tickles. One minute he’d be focused on the pads attached to his stomach, causing Virgil’s gut to suck in on reflex; the next minute he’d be struggling not to wiggle as wave after wave of tickles massaged his sides.

At one point Roman cut off all of the tickles abruptly, and Virgil could barely wonder why before they all came back on at once, ruthlessly tickling him all over his tummy, ribs, sides, and waist at the same time. It lasted for less than a second, but Virgil couldn’t stop the high pitched giggle that managed to escape. He flushed bright red, slamming a hand over his mouth, but no one seemed to think his reaction was strange.

Until he heard Logan complaining about Patton’s puns, and he saw Roman smirking at him triumphantly, and- oh. Roman had timed the sudden attack just in time for one of Patton’s dad jokes, knowing that no one would question it if Virgil laughed. Virgil didn’t know if he wanted to kiss him or kill him.

The game continued, and although Virgil was struggling to keep his face neutral and his breathing regular, he didn’t want to give his signal. Plus, Roman was kind enough to turn the belt off when Virgil was talking- ironically, this made him partcipate in the conversation more than he normally would, as he used the opportunities to catch his breath and rebuild his resolve.

Speaking of which, he felt like he needed a bit of a breather, actually. But there was a problem: Logan and Patton would not shut up. Virgil was only barely aware of what they were arguing about, but whatever it was had them both firing back and forth, speaking too quickly for him to get a word in edgewise.

Virgil bit back the whine that threatened to rise from his throat. His eyes darted to Roman, who was looking way too smug, in Virgil’s opinion. Virgil glowered back, which- uh oh. Judging from the way Roman raised an eyebrow at him, that might have been a mistake.

Virgil felt the belt tighten around his waist, the buzzing sending tingly tickles all over his torso. Virgil coughed again, this time a little too forcefully to pass off as natural, but he couldn’t waste any focus on the others’ reactions to his outburst, because these tickles were suddenly much more intense.

The pads on his stomach, ribs, and sides were all buzzing anew, and the feelings seemed to travel deeper into his core than before. The belt itself, now ever more fitted to his waist, was mercilessly attacking the hyper-sensitive stretch of skin. It took all of Virgil’s strength to not fall to the floor then and there.

By that point he’d completely lost track of the conversation. Logan said something, then Patton retorted- he’s pretty sure Roman added something to the conversation, but he found he couldn’t even look at anyone else, lest they see right through his crumbling exterior. He just hoped that whatever the argument had turned into, it would be over any minute now-

“Virge? You good?”

Oh, fuck. Thomas’ concerned voice broke through his giddy stupor, and suddenly everyone’s eyes were on him- including, he noted, Roman’s, who was perhaps watching him the closest of all.

Virgil pictured what he must look like to them: shoulders tense, face red, desperately trying to keep himself still as he sporadically twitched at random. He wanted to assure them that he was alright, but after just a few beats he realized… Roman wasn’t turning off the belt. Roman wasn’t stopping the tickles.

“Kiddo?” Patton’s voice was laced with paternal worry. “What’s wrong?”

Virgil just shook his head, hoping beyond hope they’d let it drop. He was inches away from losing it, in front of the other sides, in front of Thomas, in front of the camera. His stomach flipped as he imagined breaking down into helpless laughter, his completely embarrassing giggles being filmed for all of Thomas’ viewers to see.

“Virgil, are you alright?” Even Logan seemed close to distress at Virgil’s bizarre state. Virgil bit the inside of his cheeks, staring resolutedly at the floor. This was it, they were gonna make him talk and he wouldn’t be able to hide his laughter anymore, and they’d realize he’d been getting tickled for the entire video, and-

“Of course he’s not alright,” Roman interrupted. “You two know-it-alls have been driving him crazy with all this fighting. Right, Virgil?”

The tickles intensified further, all parts of his torso being assaulted with evil buzzing vibrations and rhythmic pulses all at once. Virgil nodded a little too desperately.

Thomas, Patton, and Logan all got similar regretful looks on their faces.

“Our sincerest apologies, Virgil,” Logan said gravely. Virgil dugs his nails into his palms to not burst out laughing.

Patton nodded. “I think we’re almost done here, kiddo, but will you be okay to stay?”

No, no, no, he could not stay out here another second, but he couldn’t just say that-

“If I may,” Roman interrupted again, “perhaps I could escort Virgil back to his room? We’re not really needed for this fight, and I don’t wanna leave him alone in this state.”

Patton awwed at the offer, Logan hummed in agreement, and Thomas nodded.

“Yeah, of course, guys,” he said, waving his hand. “You’re good to go.”

Virgil couldn’t duck out fast enough. He couldn’t even focus on where he ended up, which is probably why he found himself back in Roman’s room.

Immediately he fell to his hands and knees, bright screams of laughter escaping from his mouth. The belt had not once stopped tickling him, and now that he was away from the others he had no qualms over desperately clawing at the belt to get the tickles off of his skin.

Unfortunately for him, the belt could only come off at Roman’s command, leaving Virgil no choice but to flop to the floor, rolling into a fetal position as he let loose the giggles that had been building up for the past half hour.

“Rohoho!” he gasped, the rest of the word lost to his peals of laughter. Two feet appeared in his line of sight, and as he blearily looked up he saw Roman’s gleeful grin.

“Yes, Virgil?” Roman asked nonchalantly. “Do you need something?”

Virgil batted at his leg before uselessly wrapping his arm back around his stomach. “Plehehehehehease!”

Roman chuckled, squatting down so he could be closer to Virgil.

“Please, what?” he asked. Virgil couldn’t even respond; he just threw his head back as the tickles refused to deviate from his most sensitive spots.

“Please use this?” Virgil looked over to where Roman was now waving the remote control in the air. He reached out for it, but Roman easily pulled it out of his reach.

“I’m pretty sure the bet was that you could last an entire video, right, stormcloud?”

Virgil groaned as much as he could through his laughter. “Cahahahan’t!”

Roman laughed. “So you admit you lost?”

The words were hardly out of his mouth before Virgil nodded desperately. “Yehehehes!”

His laughter fell silent after that, leaving him writhing on the floor in ticklish agony. Finally he felt the sensations start to lessen, allowing him to gradually take in more and more oxygen; eventually all that was left were light giggles and the occasional snort as Roman eased the tickles down.

“Good?” he heard Roman ask, although Virgil was so far gone it took him a few moments before he could respond.

“Yeah,” he murmured, flushing a little as he heard his wrecked voice. “That was fucking crazy.”

Roman laughed softly. “I kept waiting for your signal, but when you didn’t use it I kinda... intervened.” He bowed his head. “Sorry, my love.”

Virgil was already shaking his head. “Don’t be. I knew I could’ve called it off, but...”

He cut himself off, blushing profusely before he mumbled, “I kinda liked... being at your mercy.”

A beat, then Roman chuckled darkly. “Oh, you did, did you?”

Virgil’s eyes widened, but he met Roman’s gaze and nodded.

Roman hummed in consideration, leaning back. Virgil realized with a start that he hadn’t removed the belt, and that he was now slowly turning the remote over in his hands.

“Well,” he pondered, “you did lose the bet, my dark prince. And I doubt anyone’s gooing to come looking for either of us for a while.”

He held up the remote control, his fingers hovering over the control panel.

“Would you like to take your punishment now?”

Virgil inhaled sharply, watching the remote control with trepidation. But despite the fact that he’d just nearly lose his mind to Roman’s newest tickle torture invention, he couldn’t deny the jolt in his stomach at the thought of another round with the belt.

So he rolled his eyes and rolled his shoulders, eyeing Roman with an unearned confidence.

“Let’s see what you got,” he replied flippantly, as cocky as ever.

Judging from Roman’s predatorial smile, he’d definitely be paying for his attitude. And he couldn’t wait.

#sanders sides tickling #tickle fic #tickle community #my posts #my writing #a stupid bet #lee!virgil #ler!roman #ts character thomas #sanders sides

171 notes · View notes

unikornavenger · 4 years

Text

Pairing: Platonic Moxiety

Warnings: General anxiety, cursing, homophobia, family issues, money issues

Word Count: 2,738 words

A/N: Ah, so it’s been a while. Haha like one and a half years. Uh oopsie. I hope someone reads this lol. I finished this sometime in 2018 and then forgot about it, so I’m uploading it now. Also, I kinda don’t like this, and I’m finishing a new fic very sooon. and sorry for this horrid formatting. (i can’t add a read more on mobile sorryyy)

Summary: Virgil can’t get a job and he accidentally takes his anger out on poor Patton.

Alright, onward with the story!

Virgil stares at the paper in his hands as his breath speeds up without his awareness. The edges begin to crinkle in his fists. It’s shaking.

He doesn’t deserve this letter. He refuses to accept the words that are screaming back at his face. Not after everything that he’s tried. Not after all of his hard work. He doesn’t deserve to read the words “We regret to inform you” again.

After so many pieces of paper with the same phrase ended up shredded in the trash, it feels so easy to just stop trying. Because he’s trying so hard to get a job. It’s so unreasonably difficult.

He’s applied for jobs he’s overqualified for, underqualified for, and ones that he was certain that he would get hired for. Maybe that’s why it hurts so much. Because he knows that he should have gotten a way to earn income on his own by now.

The desire to just be able to stand on his own two feet is overwhelming. He’s tired of staring into the black hole that is his wallet and deciding that he hasn’t done enough to pay for a cup of coffee. Friends keep paying for simple things that he insists he doesn’t want or need.

It’s the building guilt that’s getting to him. That’s it. He doesn’t want them to pay for the things that he should be able to pay for himself.

And another rejection? Virgil’s sure that he has applied for all the operating stores in a five-mile radius. There have to be more desperate places where he could apply. He just has to look harder and dig deeper.

But if he receives another “we regret to inform you” letter, he’s going to lose his mind.

There’s a hand on his shoulder, “Hey, Kiddo? You okay?”

Virgil takes a deep breath, “Yeah, it’s just another rejection.”

“Aw, I’m sorry.” Patton leans his head on Virgil’s. It’s supposed to be comforting, but it feels like the action is full of pity. Patton must be tired of Virgil using him as a crutch. He probably thinks he’s manipulative and only has him as a friend because he wants money.

“Thanks,” Virgil manages, hoping that Patton can’t hear the weird raspiness in his throat. “It’s just exhausting trying and trying and then to keep… you know?”

“I know,” Patton rubs Virgil’s arm. He finally gently shakes himself out of Patton’s hold to place the letter on the counter.

“I don’t know how I can support myself anymore.”

Patton slowly nods his head, “Are you sure you can’t ask your parents for help?”

As close as Patton and Virgil are, Virgil’s never told him about his situation with his family. It’s embarrassing and dirty and awkward. But he’s thankful for it because he was able to meet Patton. His parents essentially kicked him out as soon as he turned eighteen because they couldn’t handle a gay son in their house. He would be a bad influence on his younger siblings. His behavior was “unacceptable”.

He isn’t really mad at his parents for thinking like that though. He knows that they grew up in a generation where “gay” was a slur and there was so much negativity in the media about the queer community. He couldn’t really change their mind.

He just wishes he could for his siblings’ sake.

That being said, Virgil can’t ask for his parents’ help. He told them he could manage on his own. He told them that he could support himself better than they could support him.

And here he is. Drowning in his empty pockets, leaning on his friends for everything. Once again his parents prove him wrong even though they are thousands of miles away.

He promised himself that he would be independent and he’s become more able to do things on his own. He thought he could handle it, but evidently not.

“Yeah, I don’t think they would be able to help me.”

A strange expression washes over Patton’s face. Virgil can’t read it. “Are you sure?”

Virgil rolls his eyes. Maybe he’ll take the hint and bite his tongue. “Yes, Pat. I have to do this myself. On my own.”

Patton crosses his arms, “Okay, then, I just don’t understand why you refuse to ask your parents for help. They’re your parents. They have to understand your situation.”

He resists the urge to laugh. He would rather not think about them being his parents because they never really seemed like his parents. “I don’t understand why you think that I can ask for their help.”

“Well, when I’m struggling, I just give my mom a call and have a chat with her and I always feel better. I think you should explain your situation to them, and they can help you out while you find a new job.”

“Okay, well, some of us don’t have the luxury of calling our parents. Some of us don’t have everything served to us on a silver platter. Some of us have to actually work in order to float. Some of us actually have to try.”

Virgil could tell by the amount, condition, and brand of Patton’s clothes that he grew up in a wealthy family. Or at least one that never needed assistance from the government. Maybe that’s why Patton’s always happy. Because he already has everything he could ever need in life.

Patton shakes his head as he takes a step back, “That’s not fair-”

Virgil laughs dryly. How thick can he be? “You’re right. It’s not fair that I’ve had to work so hard in order to be able to survive up to this moment in time and you have been able to feed off of your parents to this day.”

He snatches the letter from off the counter before storming off to his room, shaking his head.

He latches the door behind him slowly, preventing himself from slamming it because he told himself he would never ever slam a door.

Sure, maybe, his actions are a bit immature. But, as he stares at a crumpled piece of paper in his hands, his actions seem justified.

He leans his head against the door and closes his eyes. Patton didn’t understand. He can’t just bring up Virgil’s family and expect the conversation to go over well. After everything Virgil’s done to prevent phrases that his par- phrases that they’ve said from resurfacing. Patton can’t just make them bubble up to the forefront of his mind.

He’s made progress that he’s proud of. It’s wrong to remind him of the past without warning. Patton has no idea how difficult it has been to not think about the people that raised him. They were his foundation that he relied on until he couldn’t anymore.

Patton has no idea.

Wait, Patton has no idea.

Sugar honey iced tea.

He turns around and grasps the door handle. He pauses. If he goes out there, Patton could be upset that Virgil just lashed out at him for no reason.

His hand falls.

He doesn’t want to be reprimanded by Pat. But, if he stays in his room, he’s afraid he might explode. Of guilt or anxiety? He’s not really sure.

He looks around him until he notices the window that leads to a fire escape. Perfect.

It takes a few moments to carefully traverse the rickety metal steps. And once he reaches the ground, he feels an actual weight being lifted from his chest.

Freedom. The air in his apartment is far too heavy with the guilt of hurting Patton and the combined failures crumpled up in messy spheres in his garbage.

He needs to talk to someone else.

His legs guide him to the library where Logan works. The walk is peaceful, side for the hum of cars whizzing past him. Memories of his youth flood his mind. When he was younger, he would walk hand in hand with his mother and the cars driving past would cause him alarm. They were so close to him and they could so easily jump the pavement and hit him.

But, everything was alright because Mom said so. She told him that the drivers knew what they were doing. And since she was there, she would always protect him. The cars would have to get past her first.

She always placed herself between the street and her son.

The rush of air from the entrance of the library brings him back to the present. Taking out his earbuds, he approaches the front desk to see Logan rapidly shoving items into his messenger bag as some random librarian assists the person checking out a stack of books. His phone is sandwiched between his shoulder and his ear.

He said he never does that because it is dangerous, and one could easily drop their phone. Yet, here Logan is, disregarding his own advice.

“I’m on my way. Try to calm down. Take a few deep breaths,” Logan hangs up the phone before throwing it into his bag.

Scrunching his eyebrows together, Virgil asks, “Logan?”

Logan whips around, interrupting his frenzy to face Virgil. “Virgil? Why are you here? Are you okay?” His voice is low in volume but still incredibly urgent.

Virgil takes a step back so his brain can comprehend the words that are quickly exiting Logan’s mouth at Mach 2 speed. “Uh, I’m fine.”

“Then why the hell-” He cuts himself off as he looks around him. Virgil is suddenly aware of him wringing his hands together. He watches as Logan takes a deep breath before informing the librarian that he has to step out for a second. The librarian nods once sharply in conformation.

Logan silently slips out from behind the counter and leads Virgil to the front of the library. He tucks them into a side street branching from the library.

Virgil feels his throat go dry. He’s pretty sure that Logan didn’t bring him here so he could beat him up, but he can’t stop the thought from crossing his mind.

“Would you like to explain to me why Patton just called me panicking because he thought that you ran away and would quote-unquote ‘do something bad?’” Logan urges as he crosses his arms across his chest.

Virgil takes the tiniest step back at Logan’s tone. It’s like his words are made out of steel. “I might have upset him.” It sounds more like a question than a statement.

“That might have been the largest understatement that has ever exited your mouth.” He sighs loudly, “Excuse me, I have to tell Patton you are alright before he keels over.”

His stomach flips as Logan turns around, pulling out his cellphone from his pants pocket. Hurting Patton is the absolute worst thing Virgil has ever done.

That might have been an exaggeration, but in this moment it feels like it. Patton didn’t deserve Virgil’s stupid outburst. He didn’t deserve any of the shit Virgil puts him through. And yet, he continues to tolerate Virgil’s presence.

Logan’s voice cuts through the stale air, “Hi, Patton. I’ve run into Virgil, and he is fine.” Virgil shuffles his feet and sniffs, “Yes, I’ll tell him… Okay… Okay… 10 minutes… Goodbye.”

Logan turns back around as he pockets his phone once again, “Patton is awaiting your arrival back at the apartment. I told him that it would take you approximately 10 minutes for you to return home. Please hurry back and fix this mess because he is very worried.”

Virgil feels like he just murdered someone. That’s how much intense guilt is crushing what is left of his soul. He doesn’t deserve friends like this.

“Thanks, Logan.”

“Anytime,” he leads Virgil to the end of the side street before pausing and turning Virgil to face himself. “Just please try to not do this again.”

Virgil swallows, “Duly noted.”

Logan makes off toward the library as Virgil is left wallowing in his own mind as his feet trudge back to his apartment.

As soon as Logan leaves, Virgil feels light, whispiness in the air leave with him. He doesn’t want to face Patton yet, but he’s already done enough damage. He’s taken Patton’s money, lied to him, and screamed at him. Why does he still care?

Why does Patton have the capacity to care about him?

It doesn’t seem fair. Virgil has absolutely nothing to offer Patton. His implanted negative attitude always brings everyone down with him. He’s not smart like Logan and can’t solve any of his own goddamn issues. He’s not funny like Roman and can’t make anyone laugh to brighten their day. He’s not empathetic like Patton and can’t help anybody. He’s just a goddamn nuisance.

He’s exactly what his parents told him he would become.

A monster.

A monster who craves power and feeds off of exuberant people.

A monster who is the villain that rampages other people’s wallets and destroys their happiness.

A monster with absolutely no purpose.

Virgil looks up to see his apartment complex. His fingers wrap around the keys in his pocket. They feel heavier than usual.

He drags his feet as he maneuvers through the small crowd of people gathering in the lobby.

Virgil decides against using the stairs as he’s afraid his legs just might collapse underneath him.

Entering the elevator, he feels like he’s breathing through cheesecloth. The keys jingle in his left hand as he uses his right to push the button for the fourth floor. Luckily, the elevator doors slide closed before anybody else could enter the small box.

He glues his eyes to the ascending floor numbers that seem to be changing far too quickly.

This problem must be solved for Patton’s sake. The monstrous puddle of guilt gushing into his stomach agrees with him.

The elevator dings as it comes to a stop on the fourth floor. Virgil exits and soon enough he is staring at his apartment number.

He should just run back down. Forget about this whole ordeal and deal with it tomorrow. He can’t open this stupid door. His hands refuse to fish for the keys in his pocket.

No.

He has to do this. If not for himself, then for Patton.

Deal with the consequences.

He wills his hands to take out his keys and insert them into the keyhole.

Here goes nothing.

The door creaks open and Patton is standing in the living room. His back is to the door. His hands are tangled in his hair and he holds his glasses in his left hand.

He turns around quickly, “Virge?” Patton makes a mad dash for the door.

Virgil’s legs suddenly don’t work, so he allows Patton to wrap his arms around him. Virgil slowly pats his back before using his foot to close the door behind them.

Patton sniffs before he lets go, “I’m so sorry. I shouldn’t have pressured you to talk about your parents. And I’m so sorry I made you feel like you had to leave. But I wasn’t thinking and-”

“Woah, Pat,” Virgil interrupts, “It’s- It’s,” he laughs humorously. “It’s not your fault. It never was.”

“Of course it was!” He exclaims, rubbing a hand across his eyes. “I should have never made you- I should have just been there for you, no questions asked.”

“Patton,” Virgil chuckles quietly, “That’s insane! We’re best friends. I should have never expected you to blindly catch my fall. That’s asking way too much of you.”

“Wait,” Patton pauses, “You still think we’re best friends?”

Virgil takes Patton’s hand, “Of course I do. One disagreement doesn’t equal the end of the world.”

Patton looks at the ground, “Oh.”

“Patton, none of this is your fault. I was just scared because I didn’t think you would understand the, um, situation with me and my parents.”

“I can assure you that I will do my best to be here for you.”

“It’s just,” Virgil pauses. The words won’t exit his tongue. His mouth is filled with cotton. He didn’t realize how difficult this would be until he was actually in the moment.

“You don’t have to tell me tonight, Virge. I trust you to tell me when you’re ready. And if that day never comes, I will respect your decision.”

“Thanks.”

“Well!” Patton shouts, “I think this calls for a tea and Netflix night. What do you think?”

Virgil smiles as Patton grins widely, “With that smile, how could I disagree?”

#sanders sides #virgil sanders #patton sanders #sanders sides fanfic #uni writes #moxiety #logan sanders

12 notes · View notes

sleepless-in-starbucks · 5 years

Note

Earth, Pluto, and Sombrero Galaxy for the space asks ( ˘ ³˘)♥ ( ˘ ³˘)♥ ( ˘ ³˘)♥

Earth- Where’s your home?Because I like to be a Vague Shit I’mma answer with America. As soon as I can flee tho it’ll be Canada or somewhere fun.

Pluto- What time is it right now where you are?Hmmmm Triple Kiss I feel like you’re looking to tell me it’s bedtime again hmmmm. But for you’re information it’s about six thirty (by the time I finished the list tho it’s now like. eight thirty ish)

Sombrero Galaxy: Do you have a crush right now?Laughs in aroI do have several platonic crushes/squishes if that’s what you meant tho. And I am treating them just like one should treat crushes: telling no one and never facing my feelings. I’m good at this alright.

And idk if you saw the tags or not but you fell within the 90% chance of getting space Remy ranting because damnit I love him. In this case it’s more like... sneak peak at an idea for a fic I might write one day in the distant future of whenever school stops hating me though.

So it’s losleep because I’m predictable af

Remy who’s gone most of his life slowly having the life stomped out of him

He’s always loved space but no one wanted to listen

Like. Ever.

His rants got shorter and shorter until they just stopped happening

He started wearing his sunglasses both to hide his excitement when someone else starting talking about space (so he wouldn’t get called out or mocked) and to hide his hurt when he was mockingly called ‘starboy’(If anyone had meant it nicely, he would have loved that nickname)

He switched his constellation covered leather jacket for a plain one

By the time he made it to high school he was a whole different person

Dead inside, dead outside, missed half his classes (but still passed them all), sarcastic and generally considered the most infamous bad boy in the school

Logan of course wants nothing to do with him

Remy’s a mess, Logan’s not, and ap courses are hard enough without a bad influence

Remy doesn’t have the zeal or care to chase Logan in this one (which given my love of flirty Remy is so crazy, I know

)But a biology trip to an aquarium ends up with them as bus buddies

Logan expected to hate it but Remy’s normally quiet unless you give him something to sass so the ride there is surprisingly peacefully

And when they get there Remy lets Logan go wherever he wants and look at whatever (Remy mostly came on the trip because the teacher said it was mandatory to passing and he forgot to call in sick the morning of)Logan starts out just looking at the exhibits, pointing out a few facts

Remy doesn’t seem the most interested in what he’s saying, but sometimes his mouth will tip upwards just a little or an eyebrow raise will pass his shades

And Logan takes that positively and slowly but surely starts talking more and more and longer and longer until he finds one sign talking about sharks and just absolutely rants about all the sharks he can name, excitedly, making connections haphazardly as he jumps between species

Remy’s smile is nearly a grin at this point and damnit it’s a good thing he’s wearing sunglasses because the amount of pure adoration in his eyes was rather embarrassing

Logan glances over at him halfway through his explanation of thresher sharks- one he had been happily going on with for a full five minutes- and his speech falters, much to Remy’s disappointment

He mumbles an apology and starts to head for a different exhibit when Remy stops him like ‘??? why you stop’

And Logan looks disappointed in himself when he says he didn’t realize he had been going on so long, he is sincerely sorry, especially since Remy’s stuck with him and hence can’t walk away from his infodumping

Remy’s just ‘honey why would I want to walk away’

Logan is Surprised because like poor Remy no one’s ever wanted to listen to him rant

He tries to call Remy on faking interest and then Remy recites several new shark facts right back at him so it seems he does care

Logan’s still on edge about ranting more in the aquarium but Remy pokes him a lot for more info, and they spend the entire ride back chatting about it (read: Remy slowly falls more and more in love with Logan while the nerd continues to explain every wonder of the deep sea he can come up with)

The school has a whole scandal over the smartest kid suddenly hanging out a lot with the bad boy

They wonder what they’re planning when really every lunch is just a chance to do more ocean info dumping

As they get closer, conversation shifts into more areas: into different sciences, into maths (most of which is Remy squinting suspiciously at Logan for understanding all the formulas), into talking about fashion and movies and everything under the sun, really, except space

Logan’s started to notice how Remy will pause whenever the topic moves to space before skillfully redirecting them into another topic

Logan knows that hesitation- the hesitation of wanting to say so much and fearing it’ll be shot down immediately, a sort of fear that’s not natural so much as it is taught, and he starts to wonder if Remy’s as uncaring as he likes to pretend he is

After all, Logan came to high school swearing off feelings in general, along with ocean talk- avoiding not only a specific type of ridicule but avoiding getting hurt by any insults

It’s not that far of a stretch to assume Remy did something similar, just in a different way

So Logan, using his Big Brain suggests that one of their study dates (yeah they started having study dates a while ago. techincally they’re not dating, just studying/chatting but like,,,,,,,,,,,,, yeah) happens closer to night, sprouting some mostly bs about the brain absorbing more information at night

Remy doesn’t see anything coming so he agrees

They start off studying in Logan’s house but then Logan says he needs a break and starts to head outside

Remy’s confused as to why he’s heading outside but Logan says he likes to breathe the fresh air

When Remy questions why Logan needs to breathe the fresh air on the roof of his house Logan says he likes the height

Remy just shrugs it off and follows him because a) he’s not expecting a trap and b) Logan’s cute he wants to follow him alright

Logan, beautiful smart magnificent Logan, starts casually talking about the stars

He doesn’t know a lot about them, he notes, and then points at a random one and casually wonders out loud about what it’s named

Remy has an answer suspiciously quickly (normally he’d be more reserved but, and I will continue to say this, Logan a Cutie. he wants to impress him)

Logan slowly lures him deeper into the trap by starting with praise (’I didn’t know that. thank you for telling me.’) and follow-up questions (’what’s that one next to it?’ ‘is it a part of any major constellations?’)Remy slowly but surely gets more into it, short one-word explanations morphing into descriptions that morph into histories and exact chemical compositions (or at least what they’re believed to be) and ages and more

At some point he took his sunglasses off to see better and Logan could not be more in love

His eyes are literally sparkling, and now that Logan can see his eyes he sees they’re coffee brown with golden specks like the stars are literally in his eyes, which is a rather romantic comparison coming from Logan, but he’s pretty sure it’s just the truth

Remy’s never been as alive as he is in that moment, and Logan wants the moment to never end, to watch Remy continue to point and gesture and explain, jumping between history and mythology and science, and Logan’s suddenly unsure why he ever questioned Remy’s ability to do so well in school- he’s just always been hiding his reasons for knowing so much

Exactly like Logan did, he glances over for a moment, and Logan was ready to faint at the utter joy on his face, and ready to cry at how quickly it died as Remy shut his mouth like a steel trap

His apology is brief, just a tough ‘sorry’ followed by a ‘we should probably get back to studying...’He tries to leave and Logan grabs his arm before he can, getting him a confused stare that’s both hopeful and pained

Logan askes why he stopped

Remy says something about boring Logan/getting in the way of study time/other miscellaneous bs

And Logan just goes ‘I don’t think you could ever bore me. Especially not with such an interesting topic. And one you enjoy so thoroughly’

Remy’s highkey ‘excuse me lies are mean’

‘good thing I’m not lying then’

Remy: :O

Remy’s further attempts to avoid the issue eventually lead to Logan just stating the obvious of ‘you listened to me infodump about the ocean why can’t I listen to you infodump about the universe’

‘this is different’

‘I find that doubtful’

‘the ocean is really interesting, who wouldn’t want to listen to a rant about it- and hey you looked so cute and happy to, I mean it would be criminal not to listen-’

‘the universe is just as interesting as the oceans, arguably more so. and the way you phrase that, as if you are not just as cute and happy- unarguably more so- is quite misleading’

Remy’s been minorly murdered by both genuine interest in his interest and also that compliment

He finally mutters something about starboy (’but I’m just starboy...’)

Logan’s Confusion and when Remy mumbles how that’s what all the middle school classmates called him he’s minorly (read: MAJORLY) furious

Like yeah he went through the same thing but doing this to Remy ??? illegal

He says so

Remy scoffs

Logan says so again, but with more feeling

Remy scoffs again but with less feeling. He mentions, offhandedly, that is wasn’t really that bad of a nickname- it was the venom everyone had in their tone when they said it that made it awful

Logan Sees An Opening And Makes His Move

He scoots closer to Remy and gently cups his face and turns him to look at him, and softly, so softly, a whisper in the night, lost as quickly as a speck of sand from the top to the bottom of the hourglass in the light wind, he says,

‘then let’s lose the venom’ quietly quietly ‘and you can be my starboy’ a promise, a lovely promise, lovelier than any promise Remy has heard before, so sincere, so perfect, and sworn beneath a starry sky of cloudless night, where every star will hold that promise and watch it too completion, galaxies swirling in beautiful normality as they inch closer and closer like stars too close and spiraling towards each other until they meet, and instead of the vast darkness of a black hole forming something so bright it would sear your eyes right out of your face explodes into existence instead

A lovely night to fall in love and be loved for all of you, even the bits the world tried to force you to hide

#just had to reformat that whole thing #tumblr stop being dumb challenge #also sry #I rant too much I know #I just love the idea alright #and I will write it all #....eventually #the cryptid speaks #the cryptid answers #triple kiss anon #ts logan #ts sleep #losleep #write losleep cowards

91 notes · View notes

spacegaywritings · 4 years

Text

Communication of Silence - Chapter 10

Sorry for the late update. The next chap is safe but the one after might have a delay. I will update you. The current situation is causing me a lot of work and issues, so it is struggle time.

Everyone be safe and treat yourself and others with kindness♥

ao3 link! story under the cut.

The door leaned into its frame and lazily stuck around.

Dee leaned down to give Virgil’s forehead one last kiss.

“Be safe. Drive, like, slow or whatever... d-don’t get hurt, okay?”

She laughed.

She was even more beautiful whenever she laughed.

“I will be safe and sound. And you will be too. You will go to therapy tomorrow or on Tuesday - otherwise I will cancel.”

Virgil commented with a scoff and significant eyeroll.

“Who are you? My sibling?”

Dee’s deer brown eyes gained another layer of depth and the emo could not help but sigh in defeat. He could feel her

“Good night, my love. Take care of Patton.”

Virgil stepped back to support the door in being so close to home and so far from the beauty leaving their proximity.

“Good night, Dee. Love you. I know.. I will.”

She smiled at him and disappeared down the staircase, hat covering her head and coat making sure that not too much of her handsome self would be unleashed onto this world all at once.

He went back inside and told Patton goodnight.

Just thinking about the ginger made Virgil hurt inside.

This while weekend had been a whole mess of ups and downs.

Not eating again, passing out on physical exercise and seeing his precious rat and older sibling again.

And having Dee meet the others just felt like the weirdest blur ever.

All in all, it felt.. not that bad.

Well, that was for hid diary to decide.

He just had to sit down and list all the happy things he had done today and how much he liked. His pages would soak it up and he could make a recap of the week.

In a few days, he would be old enough to drink alcohol, legally.

It was wild.

Just last year, his life was in shatters and he had tried putting it back together and now he was in a rather stable home and he had a person who respected him and family and friends and even a place where he could study.

Life really did get better.. somehow..

That was nice to know.

He smiled when he got back into his and Logan’s shared room.

“That was certainly something, today”

Logan greeted him with a voice, more neutral than Switzerland. Even his face looked absolutely untouched, for a sculptor to be sculpted.

The emo cleared his throat and trotted over to his mattress, losing more and more clothing as he progressed.

He was comfortable with taking his jacket off around Logan - or his hoodie in that case.

The hoodie landed on the mattress first and Virgil groaned as he simply threw himself onto the mattress, shirt coming off and pants half-way following as he lazily wiggled around.

His legs’ movement slowly died down and he commented on it with yet another groan.

“If you mean something, as in a fuckton of bullshit and feelings, then yeah - you are right.”

His words came out like spit. It was sudden, forceful and in front of a certain amount of emotions.

A sigh escaped his lips and Logan turned to him, glancing over his roommate’s laying form.

There was something about Virgil in only shorts.

Logan could see colourful as much as black ink .

When Virgil drew his hand through his hair, he blinked.

“Another tattoo? I did not see this one before.”

The emo curled up and pulled at the clothed he had just shed, forming a little pile of them.

“Yeah, uh... I ..um”, he started but broke off.

The words were too stubborn to work for him so he simply swung his body back into a sitting position and let his right arm stretch over the edge of Logan’s bed.

“There you go. If you wanted to see it. I got it this weekend so you could not have seen it before..”, he trailed off and looked at Logan who was adjusting his chair to face Virgil’s body.

He could look at the other without twisting his back in any awkward way, now.

He could see an arrow, several symbols and words connected by strings and colours.

It mostly looked monochromatic but the emphasis was made with certain accents of different shades of colour from the rainbow.

Enticing.

Logan did enjoy examining tattoos. He found the patterns to be calming and it was fascinating to see what kind of decoration people paid to embed in their skin.

The meanings.. oh, they were also a good point - considering someone had a deeper motivation behind getting certain motifs.

“May I ask what this.. foil is?”

Indeed, as Logan pointed it out, there was some sort of invisible foil strapped over the new design.

“Ah, yeah. They give you that as protection for the tattoo. It is so the open wound created can, like, heal up without anything getting into it. Others might just instruct you to put some stuff onto it every time the skin is dry. Like, they give you special tattoo lotion that is sort of anti-bacterial or whatever. But with this weird foil uh.. or whatever you wanna call it, you just leave it on and then moisturise three times a day. You keep it on for.. two weeks, I think. Yeah, I think it was one or two. “

Virgil blinked.

“I forgot but I put a reminder in my phone so I will not miss it. I just keep forgetting these kidna things, every now and then.”

He shrugged.

Logan nodded.

The invisible patch reminded him of water-proof band-aids. Considering the looks of it, they probably served as something like this.

He had never known about any of these techniques.

Virgil smiled at the nerd.

His lips hung a bit low despite being curled like a melon slice.

“Why did you .. I mean, why do you get all these tattoos? Do they mean anything to you or is it just for the aesthetics?”

The other snorted and leaned back onto his bed.

“You are funny Logan. You really are.”

His voice seemed to purr and his words were dancing into Logan’s ears. Sounds were swinging and the fierce smile of his friend was sensually sprawling over the elder student’s vision.

He cleared his throat.

“Anyway, this is some kinda sibling bullshit thing. I have been meaning to do that for a while already and finally got to it.”

Virgil looked down at his arm and played with his dirty laundry.

Just... pushing at his hoodie.

Hey, that one was actually good to wear again at least one or two more times. Hoodies were so hard on catching smells that he loved them even more.

They were the kind of low maintenance clothing he needed in his life.

“I only recently finished the sketch for it so my sibling went ahead and got it this weekend. I got it the day after so we could go and be there for one another..”, he licked his lips, “you know, sibling shit and all. I kinda fell asleep when I got mine. The vibrations are sort of relaxing and the sound is soothing.”

Logan chuckled.

“I never heard of that.”

The other got up and put on his hoodie again, no shirt for underneath. His boxers got changed and he put his dirty laundry into the nearby basket.

“Hey Virgil?”

A hum could be heard.

The man was fishing inside of his sleepover bag and eventually got out a book.

“Do you sleep enough?”

The words fell onto the ground like a judge’s gavel hitting the desk.

“uh... where did that come from?”

He laid down but made sure to glance over at Logan.

All he could see was his back since the other was sitting at his desk, writing away as if he was not just starting up some conversation between them with this particularly hot topic.

“Where did that evasion come from?”

Oof.

Gotcha.

“I swear to the stars, Logan, you are a treat.”

Virgil chuckled and the IT student put his pen aside.

“You are awake, no matter when I wake up. You fall asleep in weird places, at odd times. I saw you doze off at work - now even at a tattoo parlor when enduring pain? You stated looking paler and more stressed these days and even your eye rings appear to be much darker than I observed before. Therefore, I concluded you might lack sleep.”

Virgil scoffed at him but did not dare deny his words.

It was true.. not that it was that hard to make out just how sleep-deprived he was but Logan really hit the nail.

“However, you seem more refreshed when you visited your friends or your sibling. I assume you sleep together?”

Virgil started scribbling into his stupid diary update therapy shit book thing.

Nerdy, yeah..

Still, it kinda helped him so he did not complain. He actually kinda dug the book and enjoyed writing into it.

It was empowering to see the good happening in his life or just writing down some shit he felt bad about so he could find out how and why he was more anxious in certain times.

He hummed.

“I uh.. don’t take it personal but.. I just can’t relax here. I .. I am.. It is not because of you.”

Fuck, he sounded like some cliche guy breaking up with someone.

“Uh, I mean.. This is my problem. I am just stupidly anxio- I mean.. I am anxious a lot and it is hard to sleep and shit but it is okay.”

He bit his lips.

...self-deprecation was high again.. He put a 6 on his one to ten scale.

“It happens or whatever. It is not like I am the only person to ever have sleeping problems or whatever.”

His shoulders shrugged.

Meanwhile, Logan noted down Virgil’s response.

“Fellow lover of Bunny Smashskull, would you fancy sleeping in the bed with me?”

Virgil’s mind stopped for a moment.

Tha..there was more than a bit of information packed into this short sentence.

He.. uh..

“I- what?”

He blinked and Logan opened his mouth again to start speaking but Virgil rose his hand, eyes hardening.

“What do you mean with that sleep thing?”

His whole body seemed to resemble a cat arching its back. If he had a tail, it would be all fluffy and big, every hair on his body would probably stand up like crazy.

Logan’s brows furrowed together.

He had expected his friend to reacted with a bit more confusion and less... whatever this was. But his words suggested that if Logan did not take careful steps, he would make his friend leave.

He already sounded as if he was halfway out of the door.

Virgil had a place he had never mentioned before... now that he thought about it, it felt as if he had stopped talking about himself at all ever since he had moved in. Safe for some moments, they had barely talked at all because he was just staying away a lot.

Was Virgil avoiding him?

“Virgil, not sleeping is very unhealthy and while I am not your caretaker, I am your friend. As a friend I am expressing my concern for your health as a lack of can increase the risk of many diseases and illnesses to break out - mental and physical ones alike. I noticed you falling asleep with me on the couch despite the amount of people around us, so I suspected that bodily warmth next to you might be beneficial for your sleeping cycle.”

The emo looked at the nerd, his shoulders immediately dropping to a regular position. The cat fur was smooth and nice again.

He looked so small and tired.

Not once have the dark circles looked as miserable as during this moment.

“You are.. worried?”

The words came out in a rather silent whisper. The short sentence was once step before the other in a house with loud and squeaky wood planks when you were awake at night and needed a snack but did not want to wake up your relatives.

The emphasis on the last word made Logan question whether Virgil doubted him that much or rather his own worth.

Both sounded bad.

“Of course I am worried. Again, I am your friend and I want you to be well - as much as you can be. If sleeping together in a bed is out of your comfort zone, I would agree to you letting your friends sleep over if you keep it to a reasonable volume.”

Virgil’s eyes blinked rapidly.

Logan fucking hated people in his space. When Patton as much as nudged the open door further open, the student of computer sciences would get all cranky.

Well, okay maybe he did not hate people but he did value his personal space and he took it very serious.

Once Roman wanted to put his part of the laundry into Logan’s room and loudly announced at as he did so and Logan immediately rushed over and gave the other a more than hefty talk on respecting his boundaries, commenting on how he could have just dropped it in front of his room’s door.

He had said much more than that and Roman had eventually backed away and muttered something under his breath.

Those things made Virgil wonder how and why Logan of all people lived with a person such as Roman but...

His face turned sour again and his chest hurt.

He let out a whine but quickly formed it into a groan.

“Ugh, whatever. We can sleep together and test your hypotheses or whatever, nerd. If that lets you leave me alone”

His lips pulled into the top corner of one side.

Logan knew he did that in instances when Virgil did not feel upset at all. It was more an action of deliberation or rather uplifting feelings.

He needed to observe it further but he had found a connection between Virgil’s feelings and his lips pulling into a downward curve.

“You would help me with my science project?”

The words tickled Virgil’s nose and he had to smile away the weird feeling in his stomach.

“Yeah, because we are friends and shit. Like, I care about you and stuff. But just because I had fucking biscuits and they gave me a really good mood.”

Logan snickered and turned his attention back to his writing for a bit. It did not last for too long despite Virgil continuing his scribbles and whatnot himself. Eventually, the smaller student put his pen aside and closed his notebook.

“Wait a moment. You fucking know Bunny Smashskull? I am awake, this is not a dream and you asked me about the band, right?”

He sat up properly and put his notebook aside.

For now, his thoughts were too wild to focus again. His fight or flight reflexes had taken over too much of his logical reasoning once more.

Logan was still writing, from as much as Virgil could judge.

Really, he could just see his back so there was not too much telling but his arm seemed to flinch a bit every now and then.

“Log you fucking nerd, answer the question -”

A smug smile stole itself onto his lips and he got up from his mattress to sit on the one-time-their bed. His notebook was cradled in his lap, just in case.

The roommate shrugged.

“So what if I did?”

Virgil inhaled audibly.

“Shut up, you do not - “, he started but paused mid-sentence, words stuck in his mind as he realised what he had said and heard so far. His voice dropped from a grand revelation in announcement volume to a low one in the regular fashion of discussing a secret between thieves.

“Holy shit, you do!”

Logan back flexed but he did not speak.

Instead, he kept writing slowly, neatly for a bit longer.

Virgil was tempted to walk over and look at his notes.. or to just put his hands on his shoulders and annoy him a bit but he did not know what Logan was writing.

He did not really want to know, really. Curiosity wanted to know for the sake of finding out whatever he did not know.

“Log, fucking talk to me and talk to my face, you hear me? This is wild! I never took you for the type to rock it.”

The nerd slowly turned around.

“You never took me for the type? Very well, I was aware of my ability to hide away my interests but I did not expect myself to be that good.”

He was tugging at his shirt as if to adjust a bowtie or a necktie. Something fancy and serious like the stuff people in suit would wear.

Come to think of it, Dee did this every now and then.

Virgil leaned in.

It was time to bond and shit.

“Your secret is safe with me, log. I promise.”

Virgil shifted on the bed and patted a spot next to him.

His friend took the hint and put his notebooks (multiple notebooks, alright, nerdy nerd) to their respective places.

And Logan damn made sure to took his sweet sweet time with it.

“What’s your favourite song?”, he whisper-screamed to his friend.

Their shoulders were touching and Virgil felt fuzzy in his mind.

He giggled.

This felt like a silly sleepover already and it seemed funny to him.

Logan smiled and pulled his phone out.

“My favourite songs is “Laws and bones break better than hearts” but I am biased”, he tapped a few icons on his phone and handed it over to Virgil for him to see a younger version of Logan.

The younger one was still absurdly tall, still smaller than Patton - younger Patton - who was next to him. They were wearing black shirts with the band logo in front of it.

A crowd of people was behind them and Logan’s cheeks were red from heat and sweat but he was smiling and he looked breathless.

Breathtaking, even.

“You are biased because you went to a concert, you fucking traitor!”, Virgil exclaimed and nudged Logan’s side, “Can I swipe?”

Logan agreed and he continued to go through the collection of pictures.

Hair disheveled and shirt too big, he was pressed against Patton and smiling into the camera.

He barely got to see Logan so off-guard but it was.. refreshing.

It was much nicer than seeing him wear ties at work and keep going through flashcards before lessons so he could make a better impression or whatever.

He barely knew Logan’s lips could do something as ambitious as smile so brightly.

“You look really happy, Log..”

He had reached the end of pictures.

It was Logan just hugging Patton close.

“I got the tickets back there”, he explained as he took his phone back, “Patton knows nothing about any bands I like nor does he understand how I enjoy this sort of music. He just went ahead and asked random online strangers about which bands to recommend because he wanted to make my 18th birthday really special.”

Logan’s lips formed the same alluring smile.

It was softer than feathers and lighter than wings.

He really seemed like a divine creature with his face smiling like that.

“Looks like he got that right. I am in groups a lot and it is not that uncommon for people to ask for advice on new songs and artists but seeing a completely clueless person just join for a friend? That is wild. But it does sound like a thing Patton would do.”

Virgil leaned back, his arms crossing behind the back of his head. He folded his hands over one another in his neck.

“You giants are too friendly. Can’t relate.”

His smirk was teasing.

Logan got up and got the shirt.

“I will sleep in this. I want to sleep in it.”

Virgil chuckled.

“You’re the boss, Log. I am not gonna fight you over a night shirt.”

The nerd changed into his band merchandise and Virgil moved over to lay on his side and finish his journaling thing.

“Diary?”

He shook his head.

The bed dipped next to him and the blanket started moving.

Virgil grunted back at the movement but a few more tugs had him move over so the blanket could be on top of them rather than on the bed only.

“Journal thing for therapy. Sucks but it is also kinda helpful so I am trying to stick to it ‘n all.”

He shrugged.

“My favourite song is “poison”, by the way. Fucking underrated.”

Logan laid down next to him and put his glasses aside.

“It is a good song indeed”

Virgil hummed.

“ m done”

He dropped pen and book onto his mattress.

“uh.. let us try this.. this sleep thingy and all. Can’t go wrong, right?”

His shoulders shrugged and he slid under the blanket with his friend. The smaller figure felt like a plank himself.

Virgil flinched and got up as soon as his whole body was in a sleeping position.

“Fuck!”, he hissed and toppled after his notebook, “the light. Log, we are fucking stupid in the chilis tonight.”

Logan huffed.

“It is too late for memes, Virgil.”

Virgil walked around to shut the light and slowly stumbled back to bed.

“You can pull memes from my cold, dead hands, pocket protector. It is always meme time but night time is even more intense meme time.”

“But to be fair, at least because of me you know that this is a meme”

The blanket rustled from Logan’s body vibrating in his quiet chuckles.

“You sending me confusing pictures and sentences during working hours is not educational.”

Virgil settled in bed and curled up.

“But I might have learned from it anyway, Virg.”

It was his turn to chuckle and the emo made sure to get comfortable with his pillow from the mattress quickly being moved up to assist him.

And his blanket.

He still shared the blanket Logan was using but the more blanket, the better. Sleepy time was the perfect time to be warm and comfortable after all.

They laid still for a bit. It was quiet and sleepy.

Outside, Roman could be heard. He was talking, probably to Patton but it was too far away to make out any words at all.

It was just Roman-ish noises.

Roman was probably offended about something at work and needed to harass Patton about it even though that man was busy too and had worries too. Oh dear fuck, he really did.

Virgil wanted to just walk out and pull Patton into the happy slumber bed with him and Logan instead of letting him subject himself to Roman’s offended princey noises.

Ugh...

But it was like nine in the evening and Patton would work on his study stuff before actually going to sleep. And Roman would just fuss around.

...It was already special enough Logan allowed Virgil to sleep in his bed after all they had talked about, after all he had been through.

For some reason, he felt a bit ashamed to be in the same bed with him, to intrude so much but he quickly banished the thought.

Logan did not force himself to let Virgil into his bed. He had asked him and he was being upright about it and had napped with him before, on the same day even so.

“Virgil?”

The emo shifted a bit, his movements intentionally slow and uncoordinated.

He might not have been the best actor in the world but he knew how to pretend being asleep or waking up jut then and there. Years of training had taught him well.

Sometimes, experience was a much better teacher than getting a license and some degree.

“mhm..?”

His sounds were haphazard and sounded just silent, muffled and hidden enough to mimic the innocence of a person who was slowly detaching from the promising and sweet dreams of their mighty sleep.

“Do you hate it here?”

Virgil shifted more to the edge.

If he had to leap, he would.

“What do you mean? I thought you wanted to sleep, not start a conversation.”

He heard someone clear his throat.

Outside of their room, Roman was laughing and Virgil flinched.

A shiver ran down his spine. He pressed his eyes closed and held onto his sleeves.

“You are not sleeping, let me talk to you.”

He sat up and put on the lamp on the nearby nightstand.

Only Logan was enough of a person to have a night light with fancy nice light that did not hurt the tired eyes too much.

Coloured light was the only valid thing to ever exist for waking one up in the middle of the night.

Virgil scoffed but followed his friend’s lead to sit up and whatnot.

Leaning against the wall behind him, he rubbed his eyes.

“ugh, whatever”, he mumbled and tugged the blanket closer around him. Even then, he did not stop tugging and nudging the ends of it with his fidgety fingers, “what do you want, Log?”

He sounded as if on trial for murdering a man and his hands were still pushing the murder weapon from one bloodied hand to the other.

Logan meekly watched him, without glasses and only a bare minimum of light, it was difficult to make out what Virgil was doing or what he looked like.

“Okay, okay. You go give me the talk, teach. What did I do?”

The smaller student’s hand was hanging low and his fingers were fidgeting still as they resided in his lap.

Logan swallowed dry before he decided to answer.

“You did not do anything, Virgil, please do not take my worries or my curiosity as offence. I was just wondering why you were so uncomfortable here.”

The words easily made their way out of Logan’s mouth but for Virgil, they were less like releasing feathers to the wind and just watching them flow. It was pushing the big and heavy rock up the hill instead of Sisyphus and the chore was bound to never stop.

The shivers gave him goosebumps so bad he pulled his knees to his chest to preserve body warmth.

“Who said I am?”

Virgil was the still holding onto the metaphorical knife but it was so much easier to keep telling himself it was not him as he nodded his head as if to shake off the truth.

If he just denied the reality hard enough, maybe he could do it.

“Virgil, please. It is obvious. Do you want me to point out every moment you made it clear you dislike being here? Only today you gave me so many pieces of evidence.”

The friend exhaled.

His breath was a bit rocky.

Logan’s words truly had a punching effect on him.

“If I say it, will you let me promise me to let it go and just move on already?”

Virgil glared at him, eyes barely focusing on the man before him.

Even with the near-complete darkness they were in, Virgil could see Logan through his heavy bangs shielding his vulnerable face from the knowledgeable judge that was his nerdy friend.

“If you are saying the truth, I might.”

He scoffed.

“I fucking hate you.”

His words sounded less bitter, more desperate and weak. Almost like a plead.

They were asking him not to press further on it.

“It is him. Now good-fucking-night, Logan.”

With that, Virgil turned around and plugged in earbuds so he could listen to something that was not Logan.

The nerd gave up and fulfilled his side of the promise.

It was not as if he had not expected that answer.

...He just had not expected Virgil to get so upset over it..

The IT student called it and shut the lamp.

Despite the warmth in the bed and another person in it, he felt horribly lonely.

It took him ages to fall asleep.

Figuratively.

#ts analogical #virgil sanders #logan sanders #deceit sanders #anxceit #fanfiction #fanfic #fanficion #ts fanfic #ts fanfiction

7 notes · View notes

theeternalspace · 5 years

Text

In Memoriam 14

Summary: The metal tree had always fascinated the Prince.

Only, it wasn’t a tree.

And, as it turned out, he wasn’t really a Prince. Instead he was… a side of someone’s personality? He doesn’t remember Thomas, or the other sides, those who call themselves his friends. He doesn’t really remember anything, not even his own name, no matter the efforts of Patton, Logan or Virgil. He must venture back into the Wardrobe door, back to the metal tree in an attempt to recover his missing memories and regain everything he has lost.

But perhaps some doors are best left closed for a reason. And perhaps some personas should remain in the ground where they have been buried.

Story Warnings: Sympathetic/Grey Deceit Sanders. He is trying his best you guys. Anxiety. Self doubt and self loathing. Fantasy fighting. Verbal fighting. Threatening behaviour. Blood and injury. Memory loss. Drowning. Near death.

Previous || Next

The white crystal sparkled in his hands, catching the sunlight as he turned it this way and that, staring deep at the object that was about the side of a tennis ball with various icicles poking out. So a pointy tennis ball that would either get stuck or destroy a racket if he actually tried to play with it. Or else it would melt, the object ice cold to the touch and Virgil wasn’t sure if was actually an ice crystal or if it was just the throne room he was still standing in that made it seem that cold. Either was possible, but then again, neither mattered. It wasn’t what it looked like or even what it was made of that made this object the most precious item in the whole of the Imagination right now.

Inside was the answer to his quest. The cure to Roman’s memory loss because it was Roman’s memories. All contained inside this little ball which glowed as the light hit it, Virgil staring deeper into it. Now that he took the time to properly look, he could see all manner of colours within it, brilliant flashes of pigment that blended together to form a rainbow after rainbow and of course it would contain dozens of rainbows within it. It was Roman’s memories and what else could it be, if not extremely gay?

Virgil felt a sad smile curl onto his face as he stared down at it, absently turning it over in his hands, thumbs brushing over the surface and tracing the rainbows as they wound their way over item.

The creative side wasn’t even here and he was still the gayest, most dramatic person in the room. If he could remember his own history he would probably be so proud of this moment. Virgil would have to settle for being proud for him, for letting this image burn into his mind so that he could rell Roman about it later, when enough time had passed. It would no doubt be raw at first but Virgil hoped there would come a time when he could look back at not having his memory and the whole thing be more water under the bridge. He might even have forgiven Virgil by this mysterious far away time.

Virgil really hoped Roman would forgive him.

He didn’t know if Deceit told him what was happening or not though. Knowing his brother as he did, Virgil had a sneaking suspicion that Deceit wouldn’t have been able to resist bragging a little after Roman had eaten the jelly. At the very least he was probably going to know who was really behind it, which meant Virgil was going to have to beg Roman not to do anything foolish, to leave Deceit in peace. At the worst end of the bragging fear of course, was that Deceit would have told him everything.

It was no less than he deserved of course, Roman should know who was to blame for what had happened but Virgil couldn’t help but be a little selfish. He didn’t want to lose the friendship he had with Roman completely. Then again... if Deceit had told him, it would save Virgil the agony of having to do it himself because sooner or later roman needed to know. He had trusted the wrong person when he had so casually tossed his faith in Virgil’s lap and it wouldn’t do for the creative side to make the same mistake again.

Virgil should have asked Deceit what had happened exactly but he had been distracted, too caught up in the thrill of knowing that he had managed to convince him, that he held in his hands the very thing he wanted. It wasn’t until after Deceit had left, the darker side saying something about having to get ready for an important event that all the questions came flooding back to him. Too late. Always too late and that could be Virgil’s new motto in life.

Legs felt wobbly, as though he had been on some hideous exercise course instead of simply standing still and Virgil just wanted to lie down and sleep for an eternity. If he could sleep long enough then maybe all of his problems would have somehow managed to resolve themselves by the time he woke back up. When in doubt, hide under the covers until the sun went away and with that, all the problems. Of course the problems would still be there when he climbed back out of bed but that probably just meant that he hadn’t been hiding for long enough.

Or that Virgil should face his problems head on, but what was he, a brave idiot or a cowardly idiot?

The second clearly and it made Virgil want to laugh, something as sad as his smile, to fill the quiet space around him with giggles that were anything but pleasant. He settled on the edge of the throne, legs swinging backwards and forwards absently as he carried on staring at the object, letting it chill his skin even further.

Virgil wasn’t even really sure why he was hesitating. This was what he wanted, what he had been trying so hard to get. It was the answer to all his problems and all he had to do was break it to free the memories. They would seek out their original owner, wherever he was and return to him. Easy. One step and everything will be fine once more. Or so Deceit said and the instruction seemed simple enough, clear enough that even Virgil should be able to follow them.

It couldn’t be that simple.

Things were never that simple.

Teeth caught at his bottom lip, Virgil worrying at it, chewing slowly as he stared at the orb, as he tried to work out what he was thinking, feeling, and why it should matter. Why hadn’t he just tossed the orb onto the floor and be done with it? Why was he still keeping the moment at bay? True, Deceit probably hadn’t told the whole truth. Virgil didn’t really think it was possible for him to tell the truth, the whole truth and nothing but the truth. Still, he didn’t think he would leave anything out on purpose that could case a problem, not really. Deceit wanted him to restore Roman’s memories because if he did that Virgil had agreed to a price in return. But that wasn’t anything like he had expected either.

It was yet another example of how he should have known better, should have trusted his brother to have already played the game several moves in advance. It was how Deceit saw a lot of his interactions after all, as some giant three dimensional game of chess. He was always playing, always planning something, working out what he could get from every conversation he ever had.

Normally that infuriated Virgil. Very occasionally, it brought a hint of warmth to his cheeks when the game was to protect him, to know that Deceit was trying harder than he would ever admit to. He would fight to the bitter end and beyond in order to win. Even a retreat was rarely actually admitting defeat, but rather something more tactical, changing the situation and coming at the issue from a different direction.

Deceit was a terrible little try hard and Virgil was willingly going to pay his so called ‘price’.

Did Roman need to know about that? It didn’t affect him after all, although Virgil almost suspected it was the whole point of this. The moment that Deceit had realised Virgil seriously wanted to return the memories he had scrapped the game he had been playing and had started a new one. The second Deceit had told him what it would cost him to restore the memories, he had started to wonder if this had all been one of his annoying games that he liked to play.

Maybe Virgil hadn’t actually won the argument but Deceit had just let him believe he had.

Still, that didn’t explain why he was hesitating, why he was sat here lost in thought. Why didn’t he just end of all this? Then he could go home. He could hide like he wanted. Virgil’s arm felt heavy, weighed down by the orb, as if it was trying to rejoin the ground all on its own. The whole situation felt heavy, made him want to weep, to just sink down in a heap and never move again.

“Virgil!”

His head snapped up at the sound of his name, blinking a couple of times as he tried to work out how long he had been sitting on the throne, lost in his own thoughts. They had been chasing their own tails for a while now, twisting and hissing on a route worn thin by the pressure. It had felt like an eternity and at the same moment, no time at all. The shadows had lengthed on the statues dotted around the lower half of the throne room, casting them into sharper relief.

Which only made them creepier of course, Virgil feeling a shudder run through him as he took in some of the expressions of horror which lingered across some of the perfectly sculpted faces. Horror and terror, bodies twisted and cowering in fear or trying to run and yeah, yeah, Virgil really hoped that they had started out as statues, that when Roman had created the world he had decided to skip the step of actually torturing slivers of Thomas’ mind.

One of them was moving. No. No, now that he took a moment to focus, it was obviously Roman darting through the stone statues, almost flying as he ducked this way and that, crossing the distance between them in a matter of moments. He wasn’t wearing his prince outfit, opting instead for a pale red loose fitting top with a cream jacket over it. There were hints of his old self in the colour choices but they were washed out compared to the vibrant tones he normally went for as though Roman still wasn’t sure what he wanted from his clothes. Not that the clothes mattered. It wasn’t as though Virgil was going to get a good reading about Roman’s mental state from the clothes he was wearing and yet they slipped into his thoughts all the same.

Roman almost fell over his feet as he skidded to a stop a few feet away from the throne, in exactly the same space that Virgil had stopped when he had confronted Deceit originally.

And he was the one sat on the throne. The thought rested uncomfortably in his mind, even if Virgil couldn’t quite put his finger on why it made him feel the way it did. All he really knew for sure was the thought made him stand, dragging his protesting body back upright. Upright was almost as bad, towering over Roman, that unpleasant but maddeningly vague feeling persisting even now. He felt even more torn than a few moments ago, pulled between sitting down once more as his body wanted, giving in to the weight and tiredness, or moving forward to crouch down to Roman’s level as though that would somehow make the bad things go away.

Limbs couldn’t decide either way and so he remained frozen in place, trapped by his own indecision, victim of his own inaction. Maybe that should be his new motto - victim always, but only because of his own flaws.

“Virgil... wait...” Roman bent over, hands on his knees as he drew in great lungfuls of air, trying to catch his breath. Virgil felt a frown grown on his features as he stared down at his still panting friend.

Had Roman really run all the way here? It probably wasn’t that far from the Wardrobe anymore, the world would have carried on contracting in its death throes but still, if Roman hadn’t even bothered to walk or call for help, then he must have been desperate, not thinking clearly.

Something twisted in Virgil’s stomach, a dark, unpleasant thing to match the dark thoughts. How on earth had Roman even known he was here? Why was he here at all, and he didn’t look happy. Was he mad that Virgil had gone off on an adventure without him? That was the sort of thing that Roman would have once gotten worked up about and throne a dramatic fit that he didn’t really feel. He would have sulked for days but there was a seriousness to this moment, an added weight that told Virgil it wasn’t that. As much as he wanted it to be that, the cynical part was telling him not to get his hopes up.

That part of Virgil was normally - depressingly - right and so he had learnt to listen to its advice over the years. He listened to it now, let it whisper and vent at him, warning him that this was something dangerous and so he needed to put his walls up. Defend his heart before Roman did something that would truly hurt. Virgil didn’t want to believe it, didn’t want to think that his friend was about to do or say something terrible but his anxiety was screaming at him now. It made him want to scream in turn, Virgil able to hear his heart in his ears, a thundering beat that only grew louder and louder with every passing second of otherwise silence.

“What?” He couldn’t bear it any longer, the noise that wasn’t scaring him so much more than his heart or the screams inside his head. Roman’s silence was agony in its own right, a pain which made Virgil twitch slightly, shifting from foot to foot, the orb still cradled ever so carefully in his hands.

“Don’t... don’t do it,” Roman told him at last, straightening up once more, a pained expression on his face. “Don’t restore the memories, I don’t want them back.”

“Wh... how can you not want them back?” Virgil replied and he had suspected that Roman was a little... doubtful about who he had once been but there was a far cry between not being sure if every choice that you had made in your shadowy past was the right one and deciding that the best thing to do in order to deal with that uncertainty was to cut everything out of your life to do with it completely. He almost wished they were back in those few moments before, when it had been a world of possibilities as to what Roman wanted because at least it hadn’t been this.

Not to mention that he knew why Virgil was here. Somehow he knew and Virgil had no clue how he knew what Virgil was doing and why, but somehow Roman was aware that the ice palace was the answer to the mystery. Somehow Roman knew that the story was meant to reach its dramatic conclusion here. Strangely fitting that it should be the two of them in an abandoned throne room.

Prince and pretender.

Only Virgil didn’t know anymore who was who. Not for the first time since this whole mess started, he found himself mourning the loss of innocence that age and experience had brought him. Things had never really been as simple as his memories painted them as time giving them a rosy glow. Logically he knew this, he could almost hear Logan’s voice in his head picking things apart, pointing out all the flaws in his memories, moments that he had glossed over or straight out ignored to create the fantasy that he had been happier back then.

Right now however, Virgil just wanted to indulge in the pretence and imagine a time when things hadn't been complicated. When he knew the right thing to say or do and there hadn’t been any painful choices to make. He should have been faster. Virgil should have smashed it the moment Deceit had given it to him and not waited around like an idiot. None of this would have happened if Virgil had just followed the single step and ended this whole thing.

Eyes flickered back down to the object still held in his hands, Roman’s gaze following him. He heard the sharp intake of breath as the other side stared at the object, the sound of soft footfalls as Roman took another faltering step towards him. Brown eyes lifted to watch, trying to work out what was going on in that head of his. Not that the creative side seemed to notice his gaze, his own attention still firmly fixed on the item in Virgil’s hand. Roman was staring at the orb with a mixture of fascination and horror. It was the kind of look Logan had whenever there was a cat in Thomas’ near vicinity, with Patton cooing about how cute it was and how they should just accept death.

It almost went without thinking, that it wasn’t a good look. Hand stretched out a little towards it, the tremble clear to see as Roman finally spoke, voice a little more than a hushed whisper.

“Is... is that them?”

Okay, so maybe he hadn’t known that Virgil had gotten this far but he knew now. Virgil felt his fingers curl tighter around the orb, as if he was going to somehow protect it against Roman and what an absurd thought to think that he wanted to do that when they belonged to Roman in the first place and it was surely up to him and him along what happened to them. It wasn’t as though he was going to damage the memories, no matter what Roman had just said, surely he wasn’t going to turn his back on a lifetime of thoughts and feelings. A whole spectrum of experiences just waiting to be rediscovered.

Except that the look in Roman’s eyes didn’t exactly speak to the more optimistic parts of his mind. Rather, it spoke to that same cynical part of him that had worried at this thread of thought to begin with, who had worried this was something bad. Bad seemed so optimistic now, so naive almost, as if it couldn’t even come close to describing the horror show this moment had become.

If he gave the orb to Roman right now, Virgil knew with an iron clad certainty that he would never see it again. Worse, he would never see the Roman he had grown up with again, the one that annoyed him true and had even made him cry on occasion but still the bravest, best prince that Virgil had ever known or wanted to know. It was an honour to stand beside him, to banter with him and to be considered part of his family, one of his friends.

And an emo who's now our best friend.

Roman had written that. Admittedly in the hope that Virgil would sing with them after the first line had gone down like a lead balloon. Virgil had sung that line in the end though, he had given Roman what he had wanted, if that was all then there was no reason to keep trying, to push and push.

Expect it made everyone else happy too, Virgil’s thoughts twisting and snapping back on themselves, tiny angry bite marks in his mind. Roman lived for praise and he hadn't got it from the first version of the song. It made everyone happy, so maybe it wasn’t for him. Maybe it was irrelevant that Anxiety had been singing when compared to the grand scheme of making it a good holiday for everyone, the great plan of being together.

Still he had wanted Virgil to sing with them. He had wanted to include Virgil and had gone to great lengths in order to achieve that. Not because he had to but because he wanted to. He refused to leave Virgil behind in the cold any longer. The least Virgil could do was the same for him. Roman was his friend and he was going to do whatever it took to help him find his way home.

Virgil had to say something. He knew he had to say something but his mind was blank, an empty canvas where the lone goblin working the controls had fled. It echoed to the drum of his heart, a solitary sad sound that only highlighted how empty his brain really was. All those thoughts about how good Roman was, how strong and noble and right, and yet they couldn’t seem to form into a coherent single sentence he could use to prove to Roman that he was worthy of being saved. Virgil was going to do whatever he could in order to drag Roman back but the other side needed to give him his hand at least.

Virgil just had to work out how to coax Roman into doing that. He had to try at least.

“This is who you are Roman, this is all the answers to all those questions you’ve had since you came through the Wardrobe that first night. I know it’s gotta be overwhelming, but trust me dude, once I do this... everything is going to be better.” Virgil did his best not to cringe as he spoke, at how weak and feeble his voice sounded, how uncertain he made it seem. He certainly wasn’t buying his own words and if he didn’t believe them, how could he possibly expect Roman to?

“That Roman is a horrible excuse of a side!” Roman snapped, Virgil feeling himself recoil a little from the words, from an anger that he had not been expecting. So many possible emotions had come to mind, but not that kind of anger, as if the memories had somehow caused him physical pain without being part of him. What was he saying? What had he seen or what had someone told him?

Had another Dark Side been whispering their lies? Virgil had left Roman alone and thus undefended. Well, not completely alone, Patton and Logan had been there but they didn’t know. They hadn’t lived with the Darker elements of Thomas’ mind, day in and day out. They hadn’t learnt how to be quiet, how to be small. How to make sure you weren’t noticed, that you didn’t become a target for their rage or worse - their boredom.

Roman would have been a tempting target if they realised what had happened to him and of course they would know. The whole mind had to know, a seismic shift that had affected everything because of how important Roman really was. Even if he didn’t realise or believe it at times. Virgil doubted they would have been able to help themselves if they had come across him. The chance to rebuild one of the most important elements of Thomas in their own image? To sow doubt in order to try and gain some more influence themselves.

At the end of the day that was all they wanted. To have Thomas listen to them, because they were just as convinced that their way was the right way, the best way for Thomas to get what he wanted from life. They just didn’t care who else got hurt along the way, they couldn’t imagine or accept a world where they were not the dominant - the only - voice inside Thomas’ head. Making Roman smaller meant one of them might have a chance to become bigger at his expense. Not if Virgil had anything to say about it. Right now however, Roman was the one who was talking, his words rolling over Virgil like a wave.

“He is cruel and mean spirited, selfish, egotistical! He doesn’t deserve your friendship and he certainly doesn’t deserve to come back! I don’t want to be him anymore Virgil. I’m going to become a new Creativity, a better one. Someone who treats everyone right, someone that Thomas can honestly be proud of it.” Roman sounded so sure of himself as spoke, far more confident than he had been recently with his memories.

The blows kept on coming, mental shock after mental shock, each one pushing Virgil further and further underwater. The pressure on his chest felt real, a heavy weighted band that had snapped itself around him and was slowly decreasing in size. The level of self loathing that had suddenly appeared was breathtaking in all the wrong ways and Virgil had to hold in the urge to cry at it. So much hate. So much anxiety and guilt swirling around them both until not even the literal representation of anxiety could tell who was feeling what.

“Roman...” Virgil tried again, unsure of what he could say in this moment but still determined to try. “If you just watch the videos, you’re no-”

“I watched some of them,” Roman interrupted, Virgil’s mouth snapping shut at the words and would the surprises never stop? He expected Roman to hate the anxious side once he saw how he had really behaved, not himself. It was all so clear to Virgil, he had behaved badly at first. Sure his intentions had been good but intentions didn’t count for much when you showed up insulting and scaring the one person you had sworn to do anything to protect. It was just like the saying: the road to hell is paved with good intentions.

Anxiety had come so close to falling into hell. All those years of living on the outskirts, watching the light sides and being trapped in their world but never being accepted meant that he hadn’t learnt how to share, when to talk and when to listen. It had always been a brutal fight for attention, and Virgil hadn’t realised until it was almost too late - his old motto once again - that he was going down the wrong path. He was too much like the darker sides and that had sent Virgil spiralling in horror. Anything but that.

So he had thrown himself into oblivion, had tried to wipe himself completely from Thomas in a desperate bid to make up for his mistake. He had gone too far in the opposite direction and Virgil was just so lucky that the others had decided to care. That Roman had decided to care.

"Then you saw what a good person you are," Virgil retorted and he might have a list of his own flaws burned inside his brain, a roll call of failings that would takes days to recite but if there was one thing that his past had taught him well, it was how much he loved the others. It was how great they all really were. If only the stupid goblin that worked the controls inside his head hadn’t decided that now was the perfect time to take its long awaited vacation somewhere sunny and away from here.

“You are a good person Roman,” Virgil added when it seemed that his first attempt hadn’t gotten any response. “You’re my prince and you’re Thomas’ hero. That is who you are, not your worst fears.”

Roman shook his head and Virgil had almost forgotten how stubborn the creative side could be. It was one of the few traits that every side shared, and at any other time Virgil might have marvelled and wondered what that really meant for Thomas. Right now, he just found himself wishing that it wasn’t that big a part of him, that Roman would just listen for once.

“I saw what I saw. I saw... what he was like and I’m telling you now Virgil I don’t want that. I don’t want to be a Prince anymore, I don’t want to shower you with cruel nicknames, to talk over the others, to act as if I’m better than the best of you. Just not as handsome as me, the nerve of myself! Everyone had the chance to show the others some love and he had to turn it all around to be about himself. No wonder you weren't comfortable about saying it." Roman was ranting now, hands lifting and falling in some terribly beautiful dance as he spoke, Virgil feeling his heart twist in perfect synchronization to each and every movement, as if it was physically being manipulated by Roman’s hands.

And that wasn't... that wasn't the point, not at all. That wasn’t what had stopped Virgil from going further than an ‘implied’ when he talked about his feelings. Roman could have been as earnest and as tender as he had been in Virgil's room, and the anxious side still wouldn't have been able to go any further than he already has. Even calling it an ‘understood’ thing had taken Virgil more courage than he had realised he possessed because what if they rejected him? What if they laughed - they did laugh but Virgil had grown to understand the difference between a mean laughing and laughing with someone, something he hadn’t understood when he lived down below.

That was all his damage and nobody else's.

I don’t want to disappear and have him get up and walk about in my place. Maybe this is a good thing, yeah?” Roman asked, voice soft and earnest. So pleading, and Virgil had always struggled to say no to Roman. Or any of them really. It was a good thing none of them had ever worked out his weakness because he shuddered to think what they would have done with it had they known back where he was merely the villain and someone to be pushed side.

Only now Roman was unknowingly pressing on that most tender of sports, was using Virgil’s greatest weakness against him, trying to convince him of a course of action Virgil didn’t want to take. The world grew blurry, Virgil blinking furiously a few times as he tried to shake away the tears that had sprung to life in his eyes.

This wasn’t a good thing. This couldn’t be a good thing. How could anything that left Roman a shadow of his former self be a good thing? How could he ask him this?

“If you are truly my friend Virgil, my friend, then... then let him go.”

The ultimatum felt like a slap across the face, something stinging and sharp, leaving Virgil gasping for breath, the sound short and shaking. Unlike the body blow sensation of earlier words that had left him feeling stunned and sluggish, this was like ice cold water splashed into his face, shocking his system and making him gasp, flinching slightly, his breathing still erratic and uneven.

“Let. Him. Go. Virgil,” Roman repeated and gods why did he have to ask that? Say that?

It was agonising enough when the choice had been between Deceit and Roman, but now he was supposed to pick between Roman and... Roman? How was he supposed to be able to do that? There was no right answer here, there wasn’t even a slightly less painful answer, because either one was a terrible betrayal of everything that Virgil stood for and would leave him without a friend. Whatever he did would be wrong and although this Roman didn’t know what he had done, how could Virgil possibly live with himself when he knew the truth?

It was Roman’s life. His memories. Surely that made it... his choice? And only his choice? What right did Virgil have to impose his will on Roman after all? He didn’t have all the facts of course. It was impossible to have the facts without the memories, but the memories were the fact and he had to make the choice without them, Virgil growing slightly dizzy as his mind tried to reconcile the impossible.

A Catch-22. Virgil didn’t know what to do. He didn’t want to make the choice for Roman, he didn’t want to push and arrogantly claim that he knew best when it wasn’t his life, when these weren’t his memories. Roman apparently knew enough to know that he wanted no further part in his old life. He didn’t want to be a Prince again and what right did Virgil have to force that upon him just because he was selfish and weak, and missed the friend he was?

“Virgil,” Roman breathed, all those dark and uncomfortable thoughts and feelings pressing against him, closer and closer until it felt as though they were going to suffocate him.

Roman took the final step to make the small gap between them vanish, close enough that Virgil could all but feel his breath against his cheek, close enough that if Virgil wanted to, he could lean forward and let his head rest against Roman’s shoulder, granting him that comfort that he so desperately craved. Fingers pressed over Virgil’s own, Roman holding the orb with him although he made no attempt to pull it away. Something for which Virgil was very grateful for, right now he didn’t think he would have stopped him, his own grip feeling lax and lose.

He couldn’t breathe as he stared deep into Roman’s eyes, his own brimming with tears.

“Let him go...”

#sanders sides #in memoriam #aca writes #long post

19 notes · View notes

dragonleesupporter · 5 years

Text

Pretty Little Nothings Part 2 (Perfect World AU)

Summary: After a long hard night of nightmares and anxiety, both Roman and Virgil confide i each other as they finally leave the mountain behind.

Warning: This shi- gets REAL depressing. Also there’s cursing.

The curse of a snake’s venom is a curse to all. Both the snake, and everyone else. The bite a cursed snake gives is one of everything and nothing. Endless possibilities… the bite can turn a perfectly healthy griffin into a shape-shifting bag of tar, break through dragon scales to give a permanent doze of sleep deprivation, and even forever lower the self-esteem of the strongest warrior…

A red griffin sat with many shadows shifting around him. He looked up at the top of the ledge to see his father staring down at him with those condescending eyes… They burned into Roman as he could feel the disappointment emitting from the others in the Judging Hall.

“Dad, please…”

“No, Roman this is the final straw. I can’t have you challenging me like this.”

“I take it back! I-I’ll go to the Tree Spirit!”

“I don’t care! Just leave. You’re banished. Never thought you would end up like your brother.”

“Oh… o-okay…” Roman choked back tears. “I love you, dad…” But the golden griffin had already disappeared from his ledge.

Eyes of hate fallowed him as he slowly made his way out of the grounds… Three pairs of eyes stuck out…

Three griffins before him turned into a wolf, dragon, and snow leopard, but their expressions didn’t change.

“G-guys?” Roman called, but they didn’t even bat and eye.

“Disgusting.”

“Annoying.”

“Full of himself.”

“Stupid.”

“Childish.”

“Trash.”

Their voices filled his head, each word a stake in his heart. His vision started to blur as their shouts became louder and louder, shaking the whole world around him.

“Roman! Wake up!” Virgil shook him awake.

“WHA- ah…” Roman instinctively flinched backward when he saw two worried purple eyes in front of him.

“Why were you crying in your sleep?” The dragon sat back, face perplexed.

It was late morning, and Virgil and Roman were the only ones in the clearing. The sun glistened off the melting snow as Patton’s complaints about being hungry were heard in the distance.

“Wh-where are the others?” The red griffin looked around.

“That’s not the issue… why were you crying in your sleep?” Virgil pressed, knowing the bird-lion was hiding something.

“Like you would care.” The griffin retorted and started to fly, even though the colder climates made it dangerous for him to do so.

“Roman, WAIT! You can’t fly!” The dragon called after him, but Roman didn’t want to hear.

Soon enough, his wings started to stiffen and he couldn’t bring himself to flap his wings to keep himself in the air, not matter how hard he tried. A small sound of terror escaped him as he started to plummet down towards the mountain.

“ROMAN!” Virgil rushed to the spot he knew the griffin would hit and at the last moment, hurled himself at the falling mass and both went tumbling through the thin layers of snow.

“Roman, what the HELL are you-” Virgil cut himself off as he looked down at the red myth.

Tears were constantly filling and spilling from his eyes, small whimpers muffled by his beak which was screwed shut in a wobbly frown. His whole body shook with sobs and his pleading eyes reached deeper into the dragon the longer he looked at them.

“What the HELL happened to you?” Virgil asked, his voice much softer than before.

“I- I just remembered… why I got banished… Whenever my ego gets a bit too high… I’m reminded of how much the world hates me with… little nightmares… Roman’s voice was smaller than squeak as Virgil sat back, shocked that such a creature acting so bravado just the day before was now crumbling in front of him.

“I-it’s a curse… That keeps me in a constant loop of over egotistical attitude swings to keep me from plummeting, and then having to swallow more of that tough medicine that tells me the ugly truth, causing me to raise myself even higher to avoid it. I don’t even know why you’re here listening to me. I know you hate me.” Roman’s gaze dug into the dragon as he took a step back, guilt making his chest heavy.

“R-Ro… You know I don’t hate you, right?” His voice was barely heard over the howling wind, but it was loud enough for the prince to hear.

“Why?! I’m an annoying piece of shit! I attacked you twice, and constantly put you and the others down! You have no reason to not hate me!” The purple creature stumbled backwards as the griffin suddenly started to scream, tears pouring down his face, creating two waterfalls of agony as his eyes narrowed to slits and his chest heaved.

“Roman…” Virgil suddenly took a step forward, surprising both of them.

“T-t-t-t-that’s right! Come closer! Hit me! Hit me hard!” Roman winced as the dragon took another step toward him.

He surprised to find two hind legs wrapped around him.

“I’m not going to hurt you.” Virgil murmured, warmth glowing deep in his chest. “You’ve been really messed up, Roman. Come on. Let’s get you out of the snow. You’ll feel better in the Howixy Forest. It’s a little more humid there, and you’ll be able to fly.”

“I’m not sure if I can…” The griffin sulked, finally starting to calm down after his storm of sadness. “My wings were still stiff when I hit the ground… They hurt a lot… I think they might be broken…” The griffin attempted to move his wings just for a stab of pain to stop him dead in his tracks as he sucked in a short gasp.

“You’ll be fine. Let’s just get you out of here. Come on, you can lean on me if you need to.” Roman blinked, his blank expression said it all. No one has ever done this for him.

As they walked in peaceful silence, Roman’s thoughts started to race. Why was Virgil, the dragon who DUG HIS CLAWS INTO HIS ARM the previous night suddenly being so caring towards him?

“I’m sorry about last night.” The dragon suddenly murmured, as if he could red Roman’s thoughts. “I was staying vigilant since I’m sure we’re being followed. But you weren’t the enemy. I shouldn’t have treated you like that.”

“It’s fine. I was making you uncomfortable.” Roman found himself consoling the creature he once thought scary.

“But I shouldn’t have dug into your FUCKING LEG.” Virgil stopped walking and faced the griffin. “I shouldn’t have dismissed you so easily either.”

“I tried to brawl you, I had it coming.” A smile somehow made its way onto Roman’s face. “Plus, you’re really cool, I don’t mind- well maybe the drawing of blood is a little rough- but I don’t mind losing a brawl with a strong creature such as yourself.”

The dragon found himself smiling as well as they continued walking down the mountain where Logan and Patton were waiting for them.

@cefsticklestoo

#perfectworld #Dragon!Virgil #Griffin!Roman #pinxiety

11 notes · View notes

nightlovechild · 5 years

Text

Bad Lair - Logan's Week. (Day 7: LAMPD)

I HAVE RISEN FROM THE DEAD! My muse came back and she has blessed me by staying with me!

Warnings: Lies, Deception, Spanking, Blow job, Hand job, 69ing, Deceit (His name is Dimitri)

Summary: Logan, spectacularly, loses a bet against Roman. The bet: Not lying for 72 hours. The catch: Dimitri's been keeping tabs the whole time.

“Logan, how much coffee have you had?” Patton asked shaking the almost empty tin.

“Sorry, what are were you saying Pat?” Logan tried to dismiss the question. Furiously collecting his papers from the table and his precious coffee mug.

“I asked how much coffee you’ve had?” Patton restated. He could have sworn he had Roman fill this yesterday. “Because either you or Virgil are pulling all nighters again.”

“Only on my third cup. If you are making more actually…” Logan was cut off by the tip of a wooden paddle under his chin guiding his mouth shut.

“Well, that makes a full set in my book.” Dimitri let the hiss blend out the s's in his loud statement. His intention to get Patton's attention clearly working.

“Hi Dee-honey, did you want breakfast? We’re going to have scrambled” Patton cracked on additional egg on the side of the bowl then threw it into the sink.“Wait! LOGAN RATIONALE SANDERS! Did you just lie to me?” The shock and outrage ringing in Patton’s voice as he whipped off his apron. Patton took a towering stance over Logan. His eyes flicking back on forth between Logan and Dee.

Dimitri couldn't help but think Patton was a little slow in the morning, but quick to get answers. It made his cock harden at the fire in Patton’s eyes.

Logan swallowed hard as the wooden paddle slid back to his Adam's apple. Why had he ever let Roman drag him into this bet? Who knew not lying was so burdensome.

~☆~

“You could not!” Roman barked a laugh in Logan’s face.

“FALSEHOOD! My interests are never to conceal the facts in any situation. But to enlighten the minds of all involved. Frankly, 72 hours of honesty would benefit you greatly.” Logan said as he leaned closer. His finger jabbing at Roman’s red sash.

“Respect others personal space, please. No touching unless you’ve been given consent” Patton reminded them as he came into the living room.

“I would if Roman showed respect for the scientific method. This show is inspired by the work of Paul Ekman, the world's foremost expert on facial expressions and detection of lies.” Logan continued on ramping up for a great speech.

“Radical honesty was just a ploy. So Chill L.The show is using to get away with shocking the viewers. To be honest, It gives me second hand embarrassment. So can we just finish it.” Virgil cringed deeper into Patton’s side while pulling his hood up.

“Edger Allen Foe is right. A character vowing to be honest a hundred percent of the time is there for comical relief.” Roman explained while grabbing a handful of popcorn. “Plus betting against me? Well all I can say is failure never suits you.”

A growl issued from Logan's throat that was usually reserved for scheduling conflicts found at 3am.

“Watching your reputation tarnish like the cheap metal you and your sword are forged out of will be my pleasure.To these terms, I do accept.” Logan stuck his hand out with such force, Roman was forced to step up.

Their handshake sent a wave through the mindscape.

~☆~

“Answer me Mister!” Patton demanded.

Logan had to think fast. Roman would never let him live this down for one moment if he didn’t get past Patton’s interrogation. Spying the time on clock on the wall, He only had 35 minutes left until the bet expired. It would have been simple to fool Patton but with the Master of lies being here. Logan would need to believe his words. Sitting up a bit straighter and adjusting his tie, Logan took a deep breath without the solid gleaming paddle sitting against his blushing skin.

“As I stated previously. I have only had three cups of coffee.” Logan stated clearly and with a precision that would have made Sherlock Holmes impressed.

“You’re lying! Right now!” Patton chided as the smirk on Dimitri’s face turn predatory.

“How? I mean.. Falsehood! “I have had three cups of coffee since sunrise.” Logan was falling apart as the wooden paddle traced down his body to his lap. The increasing pressure between his legs made Logan crack. “But I haven’t been to bed yet so I have technically imbibed 17 cups of coffee since you made the first pot yesterday.” Logan’s confession ending in panting as Dimitri lightly rubbed the paddle against Logan’s sore but hardening cock.

“See? Doesn’t that feel better? Lying never suits my toys.’ Dimitri cooed while grabbing the back of Logan’s collar and guiding him over to the back of the couch. “Hold this for me, won’t you?”

Logan bit his bottom lip as he put his palms flat. The paddle looking so innocent now in his own hands. Logan whimpered as Dimitri undid his belt then his zipper with practiced ease. Slowly yellow gloved fingers lowered his pants just below his ass.

“Patton you’re in for a treat today, if you want it. There is no need to feel bad if you say no. We,” Dimitri pinched the firm ass in front of him as he continued, “have a prearranged agreement that lying is a punishable offence, isn’t that right my toy?”

“Yes, Sir!” Logan answered shortly.

“So he’ll get that is coming to him either way. But if you say yes.” Dimitri took the paddle from Logan’s out held hands as pushed his chest to the back of the couch, presenting a tempting target for Patton.

“Well, you get the picture.”

Patton’s feelings twisted and turned. If this had been like one of his Saturday morning cartoons there would have been an angel on one shoulder and a little devil on the other. It was a simple misunderstanding the Angel would say. Maybe Logan hadn’t understood the promise he made to Patton weeks ago after their discussion about coffee consumption. How it has a nasty way of making Patton panicky. Caffeine has that effect on the heart, you know. The Devil just wondered how many strokes it would take to make Logan whimper Patton’s name all pretty like? Patton gripped the offered handle tight as the angel on his shoulder fainted and the devil chuckled.

“How many times have I told you nice boys don’t lie to their Daddies!” Patton let the paddle fall with a nice smack.

Logan jumped away from the strike but couldn’t go far as Patton’s other hand weighted against his lower back. The crack of the paddle against Logan’s ass and echoing moan couldn’t cover the joyous laughter of the Prince joining the scene.

“Oh, how the mighty have fallen! My sweet sweet pocket protector! Why didn’t you just come to me? Admit you couldn’t follow through with our bet and avoid all this humiliation? Sucking me off doesn’t seem like such a mighty command now does it?” Roman bounced on the balls of his feet as he stood next to Dimitri. Enjoying how the snake’s arms slithered around him holding his body close and out of the path of the swinging paddle.

“Bite me, writer’s-blockhead. This is your fault.” Logan bit out around a moan as another smack connected.

“Oh, No. We are not blaming the foolish prince for your actions. You lying to everyone was your own choice.” Dimitri scolded Logan as he stroked Roman through his soft pajama bottoms to quell any of the royal’s protests.

“You lied to all of us?” A gruff voice pulled their attention back to the stairs. Virgil stood on the landing hugging his open hoodie around his middle while rubbing the sleep from his eyes.

“You got that straight, even though we’re gay, my fellow fibbing fatality. But, I have dibs to spank him next. You can go after I'm done with nerd-boy." Roman relished as he flexed his hands warming each digit up individually.

“Why do I have to go after you?” Virgil grimaced at Roman as Dimitri slipped past the quarrelsome boys.

Patton’s anger was a flash in the pan as Logan started whimpering, legs shaking. The fifth swing connected and Logan’s sweet voice uttered his name. Patton adjusted himself as Logan’s hand reached out to grip Patton’s pant leg.

“My sweet boy.” Patton’s words were comforting as he hugged the logical side to himself.

Gloved hands caressing their backs as Patton and Logan traded slow kisses. Humming as Dimitri joined in, lips pressing together in sets. Allowing the third to watch as the other two kiss, then they would exchange partners. Logan’s attention was slipping into the lust as he grinded against both of his dominants. But too quick to process his Sir was standing behind him tugging his pants and underwear down sharply. The elastic band made his cock snap back up, marking Patton’s tan slacks with precome as his cock bounced. Letting Logan step out of the material, Sir discarded the items.

Soft kisses to Patton's flushed cheeks, Dimitri took the paddle back. Holding it out to the other's. The royal and anxious side’s grabbing the handle at the same time. "I didn't think lying was so crucial to my day to day life." Logan admitted as Dimitri’s hands ran over his bare ass evaluating the level of pinkness. "Lo, you can't bake a cake with salt instead of sugar and wonder why it tastes bitter.” Patton guided Logan to the other side of the couch to sit them both down.

“But each cake gets a half teaspoon of salt to enhance all the other flavors though.” Dimitri purred as his fingers grasped the short hairs at the nape of Logan’s neck, his other hand moving Logan on to his hands and knees over Patton’s lap. “And Logan’s lying has greatly improved the outlook all of our morning, wouldn’t you agree my heart?” Dimitri’s voice was thick as he stroked the moral side’s obvious bulge. The responding moan was taken as a yes.

Flipping the paddle over in their argument, Roman and Virgil stalled as they stared at the cutout imprint that was suddenly carved into the cherry oak paddle; 'Falsehood'. "Who wants to make that legible across this pretty little lair's ass?" Deceit smirked thumb and forefinger gripping Logan's face tight.

“Me! ME! Everyone knows it’s beauty before the beast.” Roman said.

“Fat chance, Price Pig-head! I’m next!” Virgil bit back.

“I know! Why don’t we gauge it on the size of the lie told? Doesn’t that sound fun my toy?” Dimitri’s voice no longer hiding the giddiness of it all. Having all four of the side’s attention was a rare thing. The snake side was living his best life right now.

“Okay.” They agreed in unison. Turning to face Logan as a united force.

“Better not keep them waiting, my toy. It might turn out to be detrimental to your health if you do.” Dimitri knelt down giving Logan the stage.

Goosebumps crawled across Logan’s body as the chill of their glazes sunk in. This wasn’t going to be easy. Adjusting the weight on his shoulders by moving his hands, the soft couch cushions giving away in a way he wished the floor would. Jumping at the soft touch across his fluttering stomach. Patton tried his best to reassure the logical side. Looking over his shoulder, Patton mouthed the word, Breathe. Drawing the oxygen deep in his lungs and exhaling.

“I don’t know which one is worse. I didn’t enter the situations with the intention to deceive. But your mental states... My loves, you needed my words more than…” Roman’s bored yawning became louder and Virgil’s darken circles made him look possessed.

“I stole Roman’s idea after I informed him it was ridiculous and moronic. I wrote it into the budgeting plan journal that Thomas keeps so I could get it out of the mindscape, but when Thomas and Joan found it later they thanked me. I didn’t correct them or tell Roman.” Logan was cut off by the offended Princey noises as Roman successfully yanked the paddle away from Virgil. But Dimitri blocked the royal as he whispered for Roman to breathe.

“Your anger is justified but acting in anger is not, my dear. We play in a safe, sane and consensual way. Relax with me and let us hear the lies that were commissioned just for our dark and stormy night.” The snake wielded his control as easily as he always does.

“The longer you live the chances of dying alone increases... Dramatically. There’s a 1:68 chance you’ll die in a car crash. The sound outside of your window last night was the wolf from the horror book I have been reading. I let it out of the subconscious. No, I don’t know how to put it back. I shrunk your blanket after I spilled coffee on it, because I couldn’t ask Patton to wash it for me, because I wasn’t supposed to be drinking coffee at 3am in the morning.” Logan rushed out adopting Virgil’s ripped band-aid style of reveals.

The gales of laughter that tore out of Virgil surprised everyone, but most of all Logan. Once the fits of laughter faded, Virgil smiled wide showing his teeth.

“Roman you can have his ass. I want his mouth. I am finally going to get something good out of it.” Virgil’s voice rung deep, distortion dancing along the syllables.

“Play nice boys. Patton and I would hate to have to spread the punishments out to the rest of you.” Dimitri said as he released his grip on Roman. Winking with a smirk at the Moral side.

The royal sprang to his feet without another word. Standing to the backside of his conquest, he spun the paddle choosing the flat or carved side to start with, but then paused. “You really pissed me off with the slight to my swords valor, but this wasn’t a part of your original agreement. I need your consent Logan. Because I want my pound of flesh, but only if your willing to give it.” Roman stood like a king awaiting the logical side’s answer.

“You are so much more than I have ever given you credit for, Roman. I would be proud to be humbled by you and your newly acquired and thankfully blunter sword. I openly agree to this new arrangement.” Logan’s voice held fast as he sat up on his knees, looking Roman in the eyes.

Swooping in like only the prince can Logan was being held and kissed in a maddening pace. Then thrown forward just as fast. Landing back again on his hands and knees. The only difference was Patton was gone and Virgil sat on the arm of the couch.Virgil’s pants pulled down just enough to expose his hard cock, which he was stroking with a smirk that made Logan lick his lips.

The swing of the paddle drove Logan forward face first into Virgil’s lap. A cry of pain and pleasure ringing out as Roman brought the paddle down again. Soft fingers brushed Logan’s hair out of his face and caressed down to his temples, removing his glasses.

“Don’t want those getting broke, do we? My sweet easily manipulated genius.” Virgil slid the head of his cock along Logan’s lips, leaving a shiny pre-come lip gloss as he went. “I knew you were lying to me. I am the anthology of apprehension, the tracker of trepidation. I asked because I wanted to see if you loved me enough to lie.”

The crack of paddle rung through the room, Logan rocked forward and Virgil pushed his hips forward, forcing his cock into Logan’s wet mouth, “I love you too, Lo.”

Overwhelmed was a nice, but far off word for how Logan was feeling. Logan was fucking flying. His mind lost in the moment his cock throbbing between his legs as he pulled his legs together to push himself further down on Virgil’s cock. Virgil only letting Logan breathe when his eyes started to water. His ass burned intensely as Roman continued, having turned the paddle over to the carved side. Roman’s many hours of training shining in his follow through. As Logan could feel the lettering bite into his skin. Needing his actions to repair what his pride could have ruined Logan tried his best to please both with his sounds and body. Virgil’s deep dark moans became growls as Logan pressed his nose to Virgil’s groin. It made his slutty heart jump as much as his cock.

“Fucking love when our boys play so well together.” Dimitri sat back on the coffee table drawing Patton to his lap.

“Language!” Patton tried to sound authoritative, but failed as Dimitri magically clicked his clothes away. The soft worn yellow gloves working across Patton’s sensitive body.

“Ohh. Dee. T-that feels.” Patton melted back against the dark side’s body as the skilled hands worked all the tension out of his shoulders and thick thighs then playing with his soft stomach and hard nipples.

It was glorious. All the sights and sounds before him. Playing with his toy was great, but watching the others play with his toy while fondling the DILF of his wet dreams, Dimitri could have been stricken from the mindscape with a smile on face. But he wasn’t going anywhere. Not until they were all sticky and worn out.

“Let me see your handiwork there, Princey.” Dimitri called out while he let his hand slide down to Patton’s inner thigh. Humming as Logan’s bright red ass bore the word Falsehood over and over again. “That’s wonderful. Won’t be able to sit without thinking about you, us, all of this for days. Why don’t you give my toy a little pleasure for taking his punishment so well.”

“Can I fuck him?” Roman knelt behind Logan, gripping his hips and grinding hard against Logan’s swollen ass. The yelp turned into vibrations around Virgil’s cock, making Roman do it again, just to see Virgil’s eyes roll back in his head again.

“No. A bad toy doesn’t get that much pleasure. But you can use him anyway you need to get off. Being creative, think of something. Dimitri clicked the rest of Roman’s clothes away. The action made Patton moan at the sight Roman’s cock standing at attention.

“Fuck..Fuck F-fuck yes.” Virgil chanted as Logan continued sucking him down. Being able to truly focus without Roman’s punishing force. “I’m ...gonna…’M” Virgil’s words blending out into groans as Virgil spilled right there. Logan’s throat flexed around his cock taking every drop.

“Mine now!” Roman kissed Virgil as his pulling Logan off the other’s softening cock. Forcing Logan up onto his knees on then flat onto his back. The couch springs creaking as the prince straddled Logan’s head, but facing Logan’s body. Roman lowered himself once Logan’s hands greedily helped the prince’s cock into his mouth. Roman matched the logical side’s actions, deep-throating Logan in three strokes. Their hands wrapped around each other’s hips, helping each other thrust and move. Getting off as fast as they could manage. Virgil assisted by keep Roman’s hair out of his face as the prince went to work on their redeemed lair.

The sight of his boys 69ing right in front of his eyes with Virgil so sweetly looking after them. Adding in the feeling of Dimitri sharp teeth nibbling on his shoulder while the snake’s hands worked his cock in time with their thrusting hips. Patton come so hard, his semen arched high and splattered across Logan’s thigh and Roman’s arm.

“That’s it, come on them, such dirty sluts! Deserve to be marked for sucking each other off on the couch. F-ffuck yes grind against me, Pat. Keep doing that, right there” Dimitri’s mouth continued as he made a mess inside his underwear as Roman’s and Logan’s muffled moans peaked and went quiet. Panting and kissing carried on as everyone sat up with dopey smiles and realized how sticky they all were.

The living room slowly transformed from a den of iniquity to a place of soft blankets, sweet snacks and big glasses of water. Cleaned up and fresh pajamas on, everyone cuddled around the blushing brainiac. Making sure he was okay while they settled into to start on a new show.

Patton picked up the remote, pausing the show. “Wait, Dee you set at the beginning of this. It was a full set in your book. Does that mean Logan lied to you too?”

“Yeah. ‘No Sir, I only think about you when I get hard. The others never cross my mind.’” Dee mimicked Logan’s voice while pulling him close. “Such a bad lair.”

Logan tried to hide his face while they all started laughing.

#sanderssides/sm/ut/month #sanderssides/sm/ut/month2018 #logan's week #lampd #calmd #Day 7 #notsafeforsanders #I'M BACK BITCHES!!!!

55 notes · View notes

dirtysmut · 5 years

Text

knock me out garbage man

Virgil x Remus smut fiction

Word count: 1,451

kinks:toys, teasing, watching,

note:these smut writings are for fun so not the best quality with grammar so sorry for not everything being perfect

if you do want my stuff to get a little better you can always offer to donate it'll help me hire editors massage me if you want to donate if not that's ok too you can help me just by giving your opinion and likes on it also yas i added a few jokes cause we got to have some funnys while cumming i hope you all enjoy 💚

_______________________________

Virgil walked out of his room slowly as he rubbed his eyes he couldn't sleep again he felt restless and just couldn't get rest for some reason as he walked into the kitchen and opened the fridge his mind thinking about one of the more recent sides that popped out into the light palaces

he couldn't help but think about what Logan said... Remus used to be horrifying to him yet Logan was right Remus wasn't doing any harm just being himself and causing odd thoughts to appear and after a while he let them go he just needed to talk it out or sometimes even act it out before Virgil was too scared to speak to him or snapped at him to make him go away but now... he shook his head grabbed some milk and pour it in a mug and put it in a microwave

he put it on for 20 minutes just enough to warm it up if this doesn't work he doesn't know if he'll even sleep to night it was 1 am he tried to take pills and did everything he could to sleep yet it wasn't working and he was stressed out and wanted to have a break down he just wanted rest

when the milk was done he pulled it out and started to chug it and sat down yet nothing worked he kept waiting and whimpered when he knew it wouldn't work "i just want to sleep why is that so hard to ask for...."

he couldn't help but jump slightly at the feeling of a hand on his shoulder he turned around thinking it was Logan or Patton but was surprised to Remus

"trouble resting?" Remus asked giving his normal smirking Virgil at first didn't know how to react but looked down before mumbling "that obvious huh?... I don't even know why i haven't been resting I've taken 3 different pills to help me rest yet nothing is working..." Virgil admitted

Remus chuckled softly "well i could always knock you out with a bat..." Remus admitted Virgil shook his head looking shocked "no! why would I want that?" he asked "to help you sleep of course!" Remus claimed

Virgil sighed softly looking down he was honestly about to say fuck it and have Remus hit him like he did to Roman just to get some rest "i mean there is another way to help you rest

but I made a promise to deceit not to force anything on you guys not that i was planning on forcing it" Remus admitted

Virgil froze raising an eyebrow confused by what Remus ment before blinking having the sudden realization and memory that Remus can be complete pervert "wait don't tell me you asking me to have sex with you.." Virgil mumbled

Remus shrugged "It's an offer" he admitted Virgil blushed thinking about it he was really tired and Logan has admitted that it can be helpful for resting but if he said yas it would be his first time his never done anything like this before and that's scary to not to mention he didn't know much about Remus or know how he would be in be- Virgil was cut off by Remus "someone is flustered by the idea and puzzled are you actually considering this? I can go get some lube if you are" Remus claimed smirking

Virgil shook his head "i-i.." Virgil mumbled he actually wanted to but "um i don't want to have sex... it's going to be my first time i didn't want to rush into it like this" Virgil admitted Remus smirked "how about i help to test out the waters?" Remus asked

Virgil raised an eyebrow "what does that mean?" he asked Remus bite his lip "go in your room and wait and I'll come back with some things" Remus claimed before walking off

Virgil was nervous but went to his room and sat on the bed and grabbed and knife feeling the need to have some protection just in case Remus did... something he didn't wish to think about Remus soon come the room holding a small bag of things

Remus chuckled, "Are you going to stab me with that knife?" Remus asked

Virgil huffed "if you force me to do anything or try to do something yas and don't think of asking me to put it away! " Virgil claimed Remus just nodded "ok!" he said not seeming to an issue with it

"what's in that bag?" Virgil asked Remus smiled pulling out a small purple dildo and flesh light along with a big bottle of lube Virgil blushed deeply at the sight before looking away "w-why did you bring these?..." Virgil asked feeling nervous yet.. excited "for you to try, of course," Remus said sitting next to Virgil who froze "well?" Remus mumbled

"h-huh?" Virgil mumbled a little confused

"do you want to use them?" Remus asked "o-oh uh yeah... I guess.. I'm assuming you... want to watch or something?" Virgil asked Remus smirked "of course I want to see your reaction and make sure your doing it right" Remus admitted Virgil sighed wondering what the hell he got himself into he looked at the toys and Remus before sighing and started to his shirt off

once he did he yelped a bit feel Remus softly kiss one of his nips Virgil moved back "u-uh Remus what are you doing?" he asked Remus Raised an eyebrow "what did it look like?... do you not want me to touch you while you were doing this?" Remus asked

Virgil opened his mouth but closed it taking a moment to speak "if you aren't... going to far with this i guess.. I don't mind you touching me.." Virgil admitted Remus nodded going back to what he was doing before causing Virgil to let a slight moan as Remus slide up Virgil's back making him huff again slightly "your making it hard to undress you know.." Virgil mumbled only for Remus to grab Virgil's pants and boxes and pull them off

"w-woah what did I say about touching!" Virgil said Remus rolled his eyes "I only touched your clothes" Remus said before looking at Virgil's Member which was throbbing Virgil blushed deeply as Remus just smirked a bit looking at it his eyes sparkling a bit Virgil bite his tongue he knew Remus wanted but he didn't think he would be this way but in a way he was relieved that he wasn't judging his body which he felt ashamed of- Virgil gasped losing though as he felt his member being squeezed by Remus sliding Virgil's member into the flesh light

Virgil sighed trying to calm himself feeling the toy that seemed to have a lot of the lube in if against his skin "how's this? it's good, right?" Remus asked Virgil nodded "y-yeah.." Virgil mumbled in a pant "you know you should really learn to ask before doing stuff like that" Virgil admitted Remus raised an eyebrow and smirked at Virgil it was obvious what he was thinking

Virgil sighed "but....yas you can keep goin-A-aH~" Virgil moaned as Remus moved the flesh light up and down

Remus smirked "your so sensitive first time trying stuff like this is always fun to watch especially seeings i get to someone in such pleasure" Remus admitted licking his lips Virgil some how managed to blush deeper as he seen Remus lick his lips the sound of lube rubbing against him was loud enough but thanks to Virgil precum it sounded louder and Virgil whimper "r-Remus i feel like somethings a-about to happen... I feel.." Virgil couldn't even finish his sentence as Remus went faster

"just relax and let it happen" Remus said as Virgil let out moans and whimpers feeling his whole body going numb as he started having an orgasm causing him moan loudly and grab onto the bed before groaning as he cum

Virgil's body was shaking as he panted he was drooling a bit as he laid there feeling dizzy from it all Remus smirked "think you can fall asleep now?" he asked Virgil nodded hardly able to think "y-yeah.... w.. woah my head is.. spinning from it all still" Virgil admitted Remus chuckled "man i really wish I recorded that for myself later" Remus admitted Virgil sighed not knowing what he was expecting Remus put the rest of the toys and the lube in the night stand "I'll put This there for next time and I'll bring the stuff to clean it tomorrow night good night Virgil~" Remus said leaving the room Virgil sighed in relief "yeah thanks good night Remus" Virgil mumbled before completely passing out

#virgil sanders #smut #remus sanders #ts remus #remus mention

9 notes · View notes

raeofgayshine · 6 years

Text

I’m Only Human

Roman spends his life putting on an act, but you can only pretend to be okay for so long before you break.

Read it on AO3.

Warnings: Self-esteem issues, dysphoria, mentioned/implied transphobia, homophobia, conversion therapy

Part of this fic includes chat, so for reference: Logan is Disaster-Gay Virgil is panic-at-the-everywhere Patton is Ace-Of-Cakes Roman is Romano-Cheesy

Roman Prince was first and foremost, an actor: On stage and off. He performed in dozens of shows from the time he was little, all the way up until the end of 10th grade, when he got outed by someone he thought was a friend as trans, and backlash from the student body and their parents kept him from ever being able to safely step onto the stage again. Offstage well... his whole life off stage was an act, wasn’t it? Pretending for years upon years to be the perfect daughter his parents thought him to be, acting like their rejection of him for being trans didn’t hurt him, that he wasn’t slowly breaking under the scrutiny of dozens of doctors and therapist who tried to convince him there was something wrong, like the weeks spent at conversion camp when he was 17 didn’t drive him so close to the edge that the only way for him to stay alive was by running away.

It had been a mistake. Running away had shown his parents a weakness, and when Roman came home they had made it clear: either he would start acting like the daughter they expected him to be, or they would send him somewhere worse that he couldn’t escape. Every day spent pretending only broke Roman a little more, but he learned very quickly not to show. He could fake a smile, force a laugh, play the part of the perfect daughter his parents expected. It wasn’t like he had a choice anyway, not as long as he was living with them.

As soon as he turned 18, Roman took his things and walked away from his parent's house for the last time, leaving behind everything he had pretended to be for so long, all of the hate and the pain and the fear that had defined his life in the past two years. He moved into his college apartment early and made friends with his soon to be roommates over text and tried so desperately to forget everything that had happened before that moment.

Roman was sure that if pretended for long enough that he had moved on, that maybe... maybe one day he would finally be able to. He knew that it didn’t work that way, that you don’t get over trauma like what he had faced in a matter of weeks, and scars don’t heal if you only ignore them, but even if he had wanted to Roman wasn’t entirely sure he could bring himself to talk about what happened.

The last time he had let someone see him weak, see him vulnerable, was when his mom found him on the side of the road after he had run away from that hell. He broke down in tears as he begged her not to send him back, promised to do anything to just get away from there, and she had taken advantage of how broken he was by forcing him back into a lifestyle that only made him hate himself more and more every day.

Roman had sworn to himself he would never let anyone see him weak again after that moment. He would keep on pretending that everything was okay, that he was invincible, put together, that nothing in this world could hurt him and like he hadn’t been shattered into something almost unrecognizable by his past.

The thing is though, when you try to pretend like everything was okay, it only leads to a bigger fallout when you finally broke completely.

The cracks in Roman’s mask had been spreading ever since he left home, ever since he had started talking to his roommates and the four of them grew quickly into a tight-knit group of friends even though they had only ever texted each other (except for Virgil and Patton, who had met while on vacation and found out they only lived a few hours apart, meaning they got together quite frequently).

Every time they talked, Roman found it was harder and harder to just keep pretending like everything was okay. The others were always so honest, so open with their feelings, their struggles, and Roman felt guilty every time he dodged a question about his past, or lied and said he was doing great even on the days he hated himself so much he almost didn’t want to exist.

It hurt to lie to them, but faced with the alternative Roman wasn’t sure he could stomach telling them the truth. Even if they didn’t use his own vulnerability to their advantage, he was sure they would walk away as soon as they realized that he was broken beyond any hope. Roman couldn’t bear the thought of losing them, not when Patton, Virgil, and Logan had become the first good thing Roman had had in years. They were the only thing that kept him going some days, and he was terrified of what might happen when they were gone.

Roman knew one day that the mask was going to shatter completely and the others would finally see who he truly was and there was nothing he would be able to do to stop it, but that didn’t mean he didn’t want to put it off as long as possible.

When it finally did happen, it wasn’t at all how Roman had expected it to go.

It started when Logan had sent his daily reminder to all of them that move was in exactly 8 days (well, more or less anyway), along with his list of other daily reminders he had started sending out since the four of them had started talking. It had already been a bad day for Roman (and it had hardly even begun). Nightmares had kept him from getting much sleep before he had to get up for work, and then just as he was about to leave his boss had called and told him to come in a few hours later than normal because she needed him to cover for one of their afternoon waitresses for a few hours, meaning he had gotten up at 6 am for absolutely nothing. Then there was just the regular stress from the fact that classes were starting soon and he needed to make sure the apartment was spotless before the others moved in, all on top of his normal stress of trying to keep up his act that everything was okay despite the fact it was getting harder and harder to pretend with each passing day.

So Roman wasn’t feeling the greatest when the conversation started. He should have realized then that it was only going to get worse from there. If he had, maybe he would have been able to stop the mask from crumbling completely.

.....

Ace-of-Cakes: I can’t believe we’re actually going to meet in just over a week! I can’t wait to see all of you a wrap you in a big ol’ Pattoned Patton hug

Disaster-Gay: Was that... a self-referential pun?

Ace-of-Cakes: Mayyyybee

Disaster-Gay: You need to stop

panic-at-the-everywhere: if you think its bad now lo just wait until you meet him

Romano-Cheesy: I still think it’s unfair that you got to meet Patton first

panic-at-the-everywhere: why is that Princey

Romano-Cheesy: because there’s no possible way you could appreciate his hugs as much as me

Romano-Cheesy: so the fact you got to have one first is really really unfair

panic-at-the-everywhere: jealous?

Romano-Cheesy: Of an emo nightmare like you? As if.

Ace-Of-Cakes: Now kiddos, there’s no need to fight. There’s plenty of Patton hugs for everyone to share.

panic-at-the-everywhere: what if i don’t want to share

Ace-Of-Cakes: Virgil! I am surprised at you!

panic-at-the-everywhere: still?

Disaster-Gay: I really don’t see what all the fuss is about. It is just a hug.

Romano-Cheesy: just a hug?

Romano-Cheesy: juST A hUG?!

Disaster-Gay: That is what I said, yes.

Romano-Cheesy: It is not JUST a hug, Logan! It is so much more than that.

Ace-Of-Cakes: Yeah, it’s a Pattoned Patton Hug, they’re special!

panic-at-the-everywhere: it really is

Romano-Cheesy: Besides, it’s going to be the first time we meet. Isn’t that exciting at all to you, Logan?

Disaster-Gay: I suppose, but haven’t we technically already met considering we have been talking for the past weeks?

Romano-Cheesy: That’s not the same! We haven’t met in person, we haven’t seen each other's faces, heck we haven’t even heard each other's voices yet!

Romano-Cheesy: It’s like we practically don’t even know each other!

panic-at-the-everywhere: i dont know i think i have a pretty good idea what you sound like princey

panic-at-the-everywhere: annoying and loud

Roman inhaled sharply as soon as he read Virgil’s message, a stabbing pain shooting through his heart at the words, which cut far deeper than was surely intended. Virgil’s only joking, Roman reminded himself, blinking back the tears that had filled his eyes as he tried to convince himself that was the truth. It was only a joke. But then if that was the case, why did it seem to hurt so much more?

Roman shook his head to rid himself of the thoughts, taking a deep breath, his well-practiced mask slipping back into place as he slowly released it. He was fine. Virgil had only been joking, and besides even if he wasn’t his words didn’t bother Roman at all.

Once he was sure he was composed again, he turned back to the conversation that had continued on without him.

Ace-Of-Cakes: Now kiddo that isn’t a very nice thing to say. I’m sure Roman has a perfectly lovely voice.

panic-at-the-everywhere: says you

Disaster-Gay: Well considering Roman’s past in theater and performing, I would say that statistically, he is likely to have an at least somewhat pleasant voice otherwise he is likely to not have been so successful

Disaster-Gay: Regardless, there is a simple way for us to fix this.

Ace-Of-Cakes: Ooh, how so?

Disaster-Gay: We call each other. This way we will be able to hear each other's voices and find out whether or not Virgil is correct about how Roman sounds.

Ace-Of-Cakes: That sounds like a great idea!!

panic-at-the-everywhere: it sounds like a horrible idea

Ace-Of-Cakes: We should make it a face call!! That way we can see what everyone looks like

panic-at-the-everywhere: that sounds even worse

Ace-Of-Cakes: Oh, and Roman can show us what the apartment looks like!

Disaster-Gay: I am rather curious to see where we will be staying

panic-at-the-everywhere: ... i hate you

Ace-Of-Cakes: Does that mean you’ll do it?

panic-at-the-everywhere: if princey agrees then fine

Disaster-Gay: Roman? Are you opposed to us having a video phone call and giving a tour of the apartment?

Romano-Cheesy: That sounds like a wonderful idea!

It sounded like a horrible idea. A face call? A tour of the apartment? Roman hadn’t even had time to clean yet, and even his concealer struggled to hide the bags under his eyes. And what if they started asking personal questions? Roman had a hard enough time keeping it together over text when they started talking about stuff, how in the world was he going to act like everything was okay if they could hear the shake in his voice and see the tears running down his face.

But it wasn’t like he could just say no without them questioning it. He could at least try and buy himself a little more time to get ready.

Romano-Cheesy: It would have to wait until after work of course, but I would love to give you all the grand tour of our apartment.

Romano-Cheesy: If we make the call around 7, I could show you the sunset which looks absolutely stunning from our balcony

Ace-Of-Cakes: That sounds like a great idea Roman! And it means I can work until closing at the shelter and spend more time with the animals.

Disaster-Gay: So long as you stay away from the cats.

Ace-Of-Cakes: But they’re soooooo cute!!

panic-at-the-everywhere: patton

panic-at-the-everywhere: you are my best friend but i swear to god if i have to drive two hours in the dark because you were with the cats again...

Ace-Of-Cakes: fine. I’ll stick with the dogs.

Ace-Of-Cakes: But only because I get to talk to you guys afterward and you’re better than any cat!

Disaster-Gay: Are we all agreed then to a video call at 7:00 this evening?

panic-at-the-everywhere: i guess

Romano-Cheesy: It was my idea, so yes

Ace-Of-Cakes: Yes!!!! I can’t wait either, ahhh it’s going to be so exciting.

Disaster-Gay: It’s settled then. Patton, since this was your idea would you like to be the one to initiate the call?

Ace-Of-Cakes: Oh I would love to! Except... I kind of don’t actually know how to.

Disaster-Gay: You... Don’t know how to?

Ace-Of-Cakes: Not a clue

panic-at-the-everywhere: i honestly cant tell if hes joking or...

Disaster-Gay: It doesn’t matter. I’ll make the call. At least this way we can be certain it will happen on time.

Ace-Of-Cakes: I feel like you just insulted me a bit.

Disaster-Gay: It was less of an insult and more of a general observation. You, as well as the others in this chat for that matter, often struggle quite a bit to be on time.

Ace-Of-Cakes: :(

Disaster-Gay: Patton, I was not insulting you

Ace-Of-Cakes: :(((((((((((((((((((((((

Disaster-Gay: Patton...

Ace-Of-Cakes: :(((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((

Disaster-Gay: Patton!

Ace-Of-Cakes: :((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((

Ace-Of-Cakes: Yes Logan?

Disaster-Gay: Although it was not my intention, I apologize if I have hurt your feelings.

Ace-Of-Cakes: Apology accepted! :)

Disaster-Gay: Don’t start

Ace-Of-Cakes: fiiiiiiine

....

Roman got home from work later than he had expected to, thanks to the 45-minute lecture he got from a customer about how they didn’t “agree with his lifestyle” and how he “shouldn’t be allowed to work around children” because he was a “threat to society”. When Roman’s manager attempted to step in and settle the situation the customer only got angrier, especially because Valerie refused to fire Roman on the spot just because he was trans. While it was nice to have someone on his side, Roman almost wished she had simply left it alone instead of dragging it out for even longer. It was the end of his shift, he was tired, and all he wanted to do was go home and curl up under the covers and pretend like the day had never happened.

Not that Roman could just crawl into bed even when he did finally get home, no matter how tempting of an idea it was. Logan was supposed to call in just a couple of hours and the apartment was in no shape to be seen by anyone else. It wasn’t in the full-on disaster mode that came whenever Roman got wrapped up in one of his projects (which hadn’t happened in over a year, not since he was sent there, not since he traded who he was for the price of his life. Just another part of him that had gotten lost behind the mask he wore). He had managed to keep up at least with small tasks, like taking out the trash and for the most part keeping the dishes clean, but it had been weeks since he had had the energy or motivation to really feel like vacuuming or mopping the floor, he hadn’t done laundry in nearly two weeks and he hadn’t cleaned his room since he moved in. Not to mention the fact that the doors to the other three bedrooms had been sealed shut since before he moved in and were definitely in need of some serious cleaning.

He had planned on spreading out the cleaning over the next week and take it room by room until finally it was all clean before it was time for the others to move in. But with Logan set to call at 7 pm, Roman only had two hours to rush through as much of the cleaning as he possibly could. If he hadn't wanted to sleep for three years before, by the time he finally quit to take a shower he most certainly did. He was still standing under the hot water when he heard his phone start to ring (definitely not half asleep) and had to quickly rush to dry himself off and get dressed. By the time he finally accepted the call, the other three were already mid-conversation about Patton’s day at the shelter, though that stopped the second that they noticed Roman had joined.

“-Oh look! Roman’s here! Hi Roman!” Even having never talked to them before, Roman knew in an instant that the first one to speak had to be Patton. His smile was like the embodiment of sunshine, and Roman could practically feel the warmth radiating off of him from here. The curly dirty blonde hair, shining blue eyes, and the smattering of freckles across his face only added to the look, and Roman felt his heart skip a beat as he took it all in.

“About time you showed up, asshole.” If Patton was the embodiment of sunshine, then Virgil was the exact opposite. His dark brown eyes were partially obscured by the purple fringe that fell into his face, and dark eyeshadow was smeared underneath them (Virgil truly lived up to his name as an emo nightmare, it seemed). There was a playful smirk on his lips that gave away he was mostly joking despite the annoyed tone he had spoken in, and the butterflies in Roman’s stomach settled just slightly at the realization that Virgil wasn’t actually mad. “We were beginning to think you ditched us.”

“Virgil thought you ditched us.” Patton corrected almost immediately, frowning for just a moment in his direction before he locked eyes with Roman again, smiling as he added: “I told him that you probably just got caught up in something and would be here as soon as you could.”

“And it seems as if Patton is correct. Judging by your wet hair, I assume you just came from the shower?” Logan was the last one to speak, and when Roman finally turned to look at the oldest of their quartet, he felt his breath catch in his throat slightly at the intensity with which Logan was staring back at him. His dark green eyes were searching Roman’s face calculatingly, his lips turned down just slightly in concern the longer he stared. Roman cleared his throat quietly and looked pointedly away from Logan before answering.

“Uh yes, I was in the middle of taking a shower when you called,” Roman admitted, trying not to wince at the high pitch of his voice compared to theirs (God Virgil was right to call his voice annoying, Roman hated it). “I hadn’t realized how late it had gotten, guess I just lost track of time.”

Okay, so maybe that was a lie. But there was no way for them to know that. At this point lying was almost second nature, no matter how much he hated it. It was all part of the act he kept up every day of his life. Roman forced a smile before any of them could call him out just in case (The frown on Logan’s face had only deepened and Roman was almost certain that he had seen straight through his lie), and quickly changed the subject by asking if they wanted a tour of the apartment.

Roman’s grateful for how quickly they all agree, if for no other reason than it allowed him to turn the camera away from himself for a while, giving him time to try and pull himself together without the others staring him down. Besides, at least this way he could look at the others without having to see himself as well and be reminded of just how much he hated the way that he looked.

Patton’s excited chattering about everything he saw, and about all the plans of things they could do once they moved in together made it so Roman didn’t have to say much even as the one giving the tour, although there were a few things he made sure to point out like the fact they only had one bathroom or there was a false back in the hall closet that led into a room he hadn’t actually entered yet, but that he was pretty sure was probably filled with spiders (Hence the reason he hadn’t entered, Logan was the only one who seemed to think it was a good idea to explore it at all). The most stunning part of the tour, of course, was the sunset, which thanks to the position of their balcony meant that it set over a small lake allowing the light to dance off the water and create a breathtaking view.

Silence fell over them all for several minutes as they watched, until finally, Logan broke it to explain exactly why the setting sun made the sky change colors and what made it so attractive to humans to the point it was often used as a romantic setting. Roman eventually sat down, legs dangling between the bars as Logan spoke, resting his head against the railing and keeping his camera pointed towards the lake even after the sun had set and the topic had begun to shift towards other settings humans often designated as romantic. Listening to the three talk Roman felt himself slowly nodding off to sleep, and was only jerked awake suddenly by the sound of someone calling his name.

“Roman, kiddo, are you still there?” Patton asked, concern lacing his voice and when Roman focused again on the screen he noticed all three of the boys were now staring at him with various amounts of concern and confusion on their faces. “You still have the camera turned off of you so we can’t actually tell if you left or not, and you haven’t said anything in a while.”

“I’m still here Patton,” Roman said softly, taking a deep breath and putting on what he hoped was a convincing fake smile before turning the camera back around, lifting his phone so that his face came into view for the others. “Sorry, I got wrapped in my thoughts for a moment there. Watching the sunset tends to do that to me.”

“Aw there’s no need to apologize kiddo, it happens to all of us.” Patton smiled reassuringly, sharing a concerned glance with Virgil and Logan when he thought Roman wasn’t looking. “We were just worried about you is all.”

“Indeed. You seemed to be in quite deep thought considering it took several tries to get your attention.” Logan agreed, his voice calm but still it sent chills down Roman’s back, and he bit his lip in an attempt to keep from shuddering in response. Logan fell silently as he slowly looked Roman over with his piercing stare, which softened just slightly when he finally said “Roman, you look exhausted. When was the last time you had a decent night’s sleep?”

“I’m fine,” Roman lied, averting his gaze from the camera in favor of looking up towards the night sky, letting out a shaky breath as he tried to keep himself together for just a little bit longer. “It’s just been a long day at work, shitty customers, you know how that goes.”

“Are you sure that’s the only thing bothering you kiddo?” Patton asked, and Roman had to bit his lip to keep from spilling it all right then and there. Instead, he nodded his head, forcing another smile onto his face before he looked back down at the others just in time to see them sharing another look of concern and disbelief.

“I’m fine,” Roman repeated, more force behind his words this time, but it did nothing to sway the others into believing them any more than the first time he said it. But he didn’t give them time to argue before he added: “And even if I wasn’t, it really isn’t something I want to talk about so can we please just move on to something else?”

Roman hated to snap at them, especially when they were only trying to be good friends and help him out, but he didn’t want their help. Not if it meant letting down the walls he had so desperately built to keep himself safe, allowing them to see him vulnerable and weak after he promised never to do that again. He didn’t want, didn’t need their help in knowing that he was broken beyond repair. He had already learned that years ago.

They didn’t seem happy about it, but thankfully the other three seemed to realize how serious Roman was and allowed the conversation to drift to other topics. Slowly Roman found himself starting to relax again as they talked about last minute preparations, how their family and friends felt about them leaving, what classes they were excited to take at some point and the things they were most nervous about starting college. Roman was just starting to think that he might make it through the phone call without any more incidents when almost out of the blue Patton asked

“Did you know that the theater department is putting on Beauty and the Beast for its musical this semester? We should all go see it together, I bet it’ll be really fun.”

Roman froze, his eyes widening slightly at Patton’s words, a sick feeling washing over him at the thought. It had been over two years since he had last been in a theater having every last one of his dreams crushed as the drama teacher told him it was too dangerous for him to perform at school now that he was outed, and that he would never find a part for himself anyways on a professional stage. Acting had been his entire life up until that moment, and when it was taken away Roman found himself unable to stand even the thought of spending a single minute in another theater. Especially if it was in the audience.

“Please Patton, you know Princey’s going to be on stage with all the rest of those nerds.” Virgil scoffed, oblivious to the thoughts swirling around in Roman’s mind at that very moment, rolling his eyes. “He practically bleeds Disney movies, there’s no way he wouldn’t try to land at least some sort of role. He could probably play the Beast just on his ability to recite the lines from memory alone.”

“Actually, dialogue and songs in movies often differ from what you see performed on a stage,” Logan replied, adjusting his glasses casually as he turned to look at Roman, an almost fond look in his eyes as he continued. “However, I do believe you are correct in the fact that Roman very easily could secure the role of Prince Adam. Of course I do not know any of the other actors who will be trying out for the role admittedly, however, I sincerely doubt any of them hold as much enthusiasm or love for Disney as Roman does, and passion alone is very beneficial in landing a role.”

“How the hell do you know that?” Virgil asked incredulously, raising an eyebrow at Logan who merely shrugged, responding “I told you that my cousin performs at the local theater quite often. I have sat in on many auditions with him since I was young and have picked up quite a few things in the process.”

Roman was hardly paying attention to the conversation anymore; his mind was racing far too much trying to understand what had been said in the past few minutes to process anything else. Virgil and Logan both really thought that he could get the part of Adam if he decided to audition for the musical. But why? They had never heard him sing, seen him act, sure they knew that he loved Disney but that alone didn’t qualify as enough of a reason for him to get a part in a play. He didn’t have the voice, didn’t have the face or the body or the anything to play Prince Adam, even if he could recite every line of dialogue perfectly there was no way he would ever look the part.

Eventually, his curiosity got the best of him, and before Roman could stop himself he blurted out “Do you really think that I would have a chance to play Prince Adam?”

Whatever conversation had been going on before stopped at Roman’s outburst, and almost immediately he wished that he could take it back as confused looks settled on all three faces of his friends.

“I mean yeah, I don’t see why you wouldn’t,” Virgil said slowly after a moment, eying Roman curiously as he tried to understand the source of his sudden question. “Like Logan said, I doubt anyone loves Disney as much you.”

“Statistically you have just as good of a chance as anyone else who tries out,” Logan added, his eyebrows furrowing just slightly as he scanned Roman’s face yet again, and Roman wondered if he saw anything different this time because after a moment his eyes widened just slightly in realization. “Do you not think you have a chance?”

“No!” Roman replied, the answer spilling out of his mouth before he could stop it, shocking even himself as he continued to explain “I mean for one thing I look nothing like Prince Adam! I mean- He’s fucking gorgeous in the movie and I’m- I’m-”

“You’re beautiful.” Patton interrupted, his voice firm and determined, but there was a softness in his eyes as he stared Roman down that made it clear he was only speaking out of love, and Roman couldn’t stop the tears that filled his eyes as Patton repeated. “You are absolutely, 100%, stunningly beautiful.”

“You...You think I’m beautiful?” Roman whispered, his voice soft and disbelieving, like that of a child’s when you tell them something they don’t quite understand. It was enough to make tears start running down Patton’s face, and Roman’s eyes widened in concern over what he had done but before he could apologize Logan added

“You are one of the most handsome men I have had the pleasure of Meeting.” Roman wasn’t sure if it was the fierce certainty in Logan’s voice, or maybe just the fact that he had called him handsome, but at that moment he couldn’t hold back the tears any longer and he dropped his phone into his lap so he could cover his face as he began to cry for the first time in a long time, though out of pain or happiness he really wasn’t quite sure.

Well, he wasn’t sure until Virgil added: “You definitely live up to the last name Prince.”

Roman laughed wetly, lifting his head to look back down at his phone, a real smile pulling at the corner of his lips, and softly he said: “Thank you.”

#sanders sides #sanders sides angst #Roman Sanders #Logan Sanders #Patton Sanders #virgil sanders #platonic lamp #tw: self loathing #tw: dysphoria #tw: implied transphobia #tw: implied homophobia #tw: mentioned conversion therapy #Ravenpuff Writes #to be continued...???#maybe

49 notes · View notes

royal-duality · 6 years

Text

Don’t Say It...

Word Count: 1,529

Warnings: Anxiety

Pairings: Prinxiety

Summary: Roman just wants to share his love for his boyfriend, but Virgil keeps cutting him off.

The entire fiasco had been going on for nearly a month now. Roman would find a way to confess to Virgil how he felt, but every time Virgil would cut him off with some excuse to run away or with something completely random.

At first, he thought nothing of it. Virgil constantly worried, this was nothing new. However, after 2 weeks of being cut off any time Roman tried to make and large gesture of affection or became too emotional or serious, Roman was beginning to realize that Virgil was doing it intentionally. He was finding excuses to run away.

That stopped now.

Roman stared at Virgil with hard determined eyes. The other side stared at him in fear before his gaze flickered around looking for a way out. “Virgil.” Wide eyes stared into his with fear as pale side’s breathing stuttered.

“I lo-” His sentence was cut off by Virgil screaming, causing Roman to startle with wide eyes.

“STOP IT! Please, don’t say it!” Virgil’s breath was heavy as he panted. He trembled with his eyes clenched shut and if his hands weren’t pinned by Roman’s own, he most likely would have been covering his ears as well.

“Why? Why won’t you let me tell you how much I care?” Roman felt a growl rise in his throat as he felt his stomach drop. What was Virgil so afraid of? Why wouldn’t he just let Roman say the words.

The other ignored him in favor of attempting to struggle free of Roman’s grip which only tightened. “Virgil! Just tell me what your problem is!” He felt the other freeze.

A few moments of silence passed, the air was thick with tension. “Please just don’t say those words…” Roman felt his heart break slowly as he began to lose hope.

“Why?” Roman was ready for another moment filled with tension, but Virgil’s reply was immediate as he turned and snarled at Roman with tears in his eyes.

“Because I can’t guarantee that I’ll be able to say it back!” The creative side froze at his words, his grip slackening enough for Virgil to rip free.

“W-What?” He looked at the anxious side with wide eyes, hoping that Virgil would elaborate or laugh and say it was all a joke.

The other side struggled to catch his breath before turning his gaze to the ground as his hands fiddled with his sleeves. Roman felt tears well in his eyes, threatening to spill over even as he fought to keep them from falling. “Virgil… What do you mean?”

He watched the other who seemed on the verge of a panic attack. “I’m sorry…” With that he watched as the other side hurriedly sank out, presumably to his room. Roman didn’t know what to think or say or do. Did Virgil just break up with him?

No…. He would’ve known if he had. Right?

Then why did his heart feel so broken?

Suddenly the creative side fell to the floor as the tears finally won and began to spill down his cheeks. He heard a distant humming noise as he stared at the wall in a daze.

Roman could never be sure, but he thought he heard a gasp as well as footsteps before he eventually just passed out.

When Roman woke up it was to a worried Logan and Patton, who were staring at him with furrowed brows and saddened gazes. “Roman, kiddo, you okay?” The creative side contemplated his response before hesitantly shaking his head.

He waited for a moment before relaying the latest events to the two traits who listened patiently.

Logan was the first to respond. “While it is entirely possible that Virgil may have been intending to break apart from your relationship, the state he has been in lately suggests that there is a much deeper issue lying underneath the surface.” Roman looked at Logan quizzically before turning to see what Patton’s advice was.

“Kiddo, I know you want answers, however, the only one who can give them to you is Virgil.” He stared at Patton with wide, disbelieving eyes as the fatherly side smiled kindly at him in understanding

The creative side felt a pout form on his lips before he stood up with a look of determination in his eyes. He rushed off to find his emo boyfriend to (hopefully) sort things out between them.

Coming upon the emo boy’s door, he stood in front of it hesitantly. Was he really ready to do this? Yes. He had hope that everything would be okay. That they would be okay.

And so, with a knock on the door, Roman waited for Virgil to make the next move. A fond smile came upon the Princely side’s face as he turned the knob and opened the door before walking inside. He knew that if Virgil really didn’t want anyone inside, he would keep his door locked. He looked around and found Virgil sitting at his desk, more than likely writing or reading, seeing as he was donning his glasses.

Roman cleared his throat and watched with amusement as Virgil quickly took his glasses off and fumbled to close the book on his desk. “W-what?” His voice was squeaky as his face heated up in embarrassment.

A snort left Roman as he watched his boyfriend try and fail to hide his secret hobby. Roman was surprised to find that Virgil himself had to wear glasses, but only wore them when reading or writing. It apparently ruined his aesthetic. Which was true, the glasses looked too cute on him and made his dark edge lord look completely null and void.

“…Hey.” So much for the hopeful, happy vibe that he had going on. Roman’s smile dropped as he let his gaze fall to his feet.

“Hey.”

The air was thick with tension as both parties fell silent. The minutes ticked by as the two waited in silence, the room, making them both more anxious as time passed. Roman let out a frustrated growl as he turned his gaze to his lover.

“Virgil, can you please just talk to me? Give me a reason for whatever you’re doing?” The words slashed at Virgil’s wall that he had built. The emo side hunched his shoulders in and let his head fall in defeat.

“I’m scared.” The sentence was spoken with millions of meanings behind it, but Roman could sense there was more to it. That sentence was just a chapter of the story. “I know you want to say those three words, but god it terrifies me Roman!” He watched as pale hands tangled themselves in purple hair.

“My heart beats so fast whenever I even think about you! It skips beats and I’m afraid one of these days you’re gonna look at me and my heart’s just gonna stop beating altogether!” He felt the room shift to accompany the distress radiating from Virgil.

“I’m scared that everything’s gonna fall apart as soon as you say those words. I’m scared that your gonna leave me as soon as I say them back.” Roman stared at his boyfriend with wide eyes as the side became more and more frantic. He had begun pacing the room and tugging at his hair. “God, I’ve never felt this way before, and I’m not ready for it to end. All good things come to an end and it only makes sense that something as precious as us would break apart from three heavy words. I just-” Virgil had stopped his pacing and stared right at Roman with teary eyes. “I don’t want to lose you. I can’t.”

Roman wasted no time in rushing forward and pulling his beloved into his arms. He felt the other sob against his chest as he finally let his emotions come forth into the open. “You won’t lose me Virgil. I promise.” He placed a kiss to the top of his head before gently rocking them back and forth.

Soothing words were whispered as heart wrenching sobs continued to tear themselves from Virgil’s lips. However, soon the wails faded into silence as Virgil’s exhaustion took over his body. Roman slipped his hands under Virgil’s knees and picked the way too light side up before tucking him into his bed.

Roman watched the other fondly as soft snores sounded from the boy who had his heart wrapped around his fingers. Leaning down, he pressed a kiss to the other’s forehead before whispering three words,

“I love you.”

#angst #denial #fear of abandonment #prinxiety #sanders sides #virgil sanders #roman sanders #logan sanders #patton sanders #minor fluff

92 notes · View notes

universeinform-blog · 7 years

Text

Trains, Planes and Automobiles: your travel options during

New Post has been published on https://universeinform.com/2017/03/30/trains-planes-and-automobiles-your-travel-options-during/

Trains, Planes and Automobiles: your travel options during

Wintry weather Hurricane Stella is barrelling down at the Northeast, and maximum fundamental transit structures in the course of the vicinity are being floored to a halt.

The airways that perform out of Bradley International Airport in Windsor Locks and Logan Airport in Boston are canceling arrivals and departures left and proper.

Amtrak also introduced changed schedules for teaching routes jogging between Washington and Boston, and people with reservations for teach journey are being advocated to reveal situations and take a look at their educate’s repute earlier than heading leaving domestic.

Amtrak introduced there may be no Acela Explicit carrier among New york Town and Boston, and there might be modified service among NY City and Washington.

also, the Northeast Regional service between Boston and Washington and other routes will function on a modified schedule with a few trains “truncated or canceled.”

The Growth and Development of the Automobile Industry – A Deeper Insight

The word “Automobile” has its origins in Greek and Latin and it has ended up an essential a part of each guy’s existence. It has grown to be so integral that on a median, someone spends a minimum 3 hours in his vehicle each day. The car changed into once thought of as a luxurious and simplest a pick out few could indulge in. Now, the times have changed and motors have come to be a means of transportation catering to the sizable majority.

The transformation from luxury to inevitability

Cars, in widespread, check with the humble car and the estimates advocate that there may be a vehicle for every eleven humans on this planet amounting as much as 590 million passenger motors. There are numerous variations of automobiles that cater to each cross phase of the population. There are variants that could set you back by means of multiple million dollars and different models that price you some thousand bucks.

The technological advances within the Vehicle quarter have been incredible inside the ultimate a hundred years. The century’s finest invention or development need to truly belong to the automobile industry. One of the earliest pioneers of the automobile enterprise become Ransom Olds from the Oldsmobile manufacturing unit. within the early 1900’s, he brought the Production Line idea, therefore churning out automobiles each little while. This concept became significantly revolutionized and applied by way of Henry Ford, who extended Automobile enterprise to the next level. Ford speedy grew within the first half of 20th century and slowly however regularly spread globally.automobile insurance quotes online

Growing alongside time

With the advancement of age, the automobile industry step by step grew in continental Europe and England. Japan introduced fine projects that further improved the enterprise. Toyota from Japan were the pioneers of Total first-rate Control and six Sigma, that have been the guiding standards of the car industry for the ultimate 50 years. Nowadays, Toyota is the world’s largest Vehicle organization consistent with current market estimates.

The global growth of the 1980’s was in large part due to the car revolution. Ford, standard Vehicles and Chrysler, the big 3 automobile giants of America, had a massive say on u. S . A .’s financial system. They determined the health of the financial system and the recent worldwide financial recession has affected them badly. This has made them approach the authorities for loans and advantages, which have been fulfilled by way of the authorities after setting appropriate clauses.

Creation of technology and innovations

The car has transcended from being a medium of transportation to a medium of amusement after the appearance of notable fast motors competing in opposition to every other. NASCAR and F1 races are huge crowd pullers each yr. People have made fortunes and drivers of those machines have made their call in records. The reality that Vehicle racing entails massive fees has made the racing enterprise reel in these uncertain financial instances. The sport has visible tragedies with the loss of life in sometimes. This has made room for strict safety regulations, which might be now mandatory for all the auto indicates.

The negative part

Even though man has made a massive soar ahead with vehicles, there may be a disadvantage to this technological surprise. The emissions from these machines have raised serious environmental concerns with requires greater beef vehicles. Car businesses have invested extremely in research and improvement of beef automobiles. Except for this unmarried downside, there is slightest of doubts to say that cars were the locate of the previous century.

What Travel Agents Should Keep in Mind When Choosing a DMC Partner

A DMC (Vacation spot Control Business enterprise) presents full-size nearby Vacation spot information and work because of the extension of your travel organization. Going by means of their process responsibilities, any DMC is accountable for presenting logistic services of their Destination starting from the meet and greet options, transfers, lodge accommodation, themed activities, convention venues, more than one eating alternatives etc. They want to be trusted at both creative and professional degrees.bing travel predictor

Automobile transport

At the quiet of the day, nobody, however, the DMCs can offer the nice preferential costs for travel change offerings. A professional DMC will update itself on the ultra-modern training, requirements, and practices within the DMC industry. Keeping and bringing excellence and ethical enterprise practices are what is critical to surviving on this aggressive tourism section. Other than the intangible qualifications, the subsequent quotients are necessary to choose before rating someone as a dependable DMC.

Relevant Revel in

It is important that your DMC have to be efficient in managing itinerary creation which serves as the key issue of staying organized and making it attractive to the primary-time tourists. Display your DMC whether they have got bought comparable excursions and activities you’re seeking out. Additionally,

Consciousness at the marketing and provider strengths to recognize the way to strategize the tour plans. It would not be any manner wise to associate with a DMC who isn’t always positive of the call for from their patron base. For a DMC, industry knowledge is vital for planning activities, tour, and meetings.

Economic Balance

Remote places commercial enterprise needs to be finished with a great deal care and caution. Every so often the condescending attitude of the international shoppers can be cleared via discussions like whether they have any records of running with comparable excursion operators or what are their Economic sources and credit worthiness.

Stable Partnerships

Sturdy, lengthy-standing partnerships with clients and retail tour marketers will make the holiday Enjoy smoother for the vacationers. This is all of the more essential for the Overseas partners to ensure cease-to-end, day tour service.

Contacts

One of the primary responsibilities for a Destination Control Business enterprise is to execute the tourism plans and for this, they want to be well related to meet the expectations of your clients and get you repeat enterprise. It’s, therefore, essential to recognize how many and what varieties of neighborhood provider vendors they’re linked to, whether It’s motels, floor transportation groups, interest vendors or maybe authorities bodies.

Ok resources

A Destination Management Organization is anticipated to deal with the whole factor of the social calendar of the patron. To get the maximum from your DMC, make sure to test what that particular DMC specializes in the expected range of services.

Check whether they are Vacation spot marketer

Nearby know-how and knowledge are the main promoting points of any DMC. However, what makes one DMC better than the other is how they installation their neighborhood knowledge on tourism strategies. A very good DMC should be capable of creating demand for his or her Destination which would be wrapped in innovative sports.

Teenagers Should Be Allowed to Work During School Holidays – What Is Your Opinion?

These days, it isn’t always outlandish to see many teens are operating element-time as promoters or income girls at some point of the faculty holidays. Dad and mom are inclined to allow their children to work component-time so that their kids will spend their faculty holidays nicely without losing any time on surfing the internet and playing laptop games. However

A few Mother and father do no longer allow their children to work component-time because they have the fallacy of thinking that their youngsters aren’t mature enough to work. In my opinion, I partly agree that teens need to be allowed to work at some point of the school holidays because of the motives that young adults can earn their very own pocket money, study adequate understanding from working and the teens’ teachers overall performance might be affected.

Faculty vacations are defined as a length for the students to relaxation and keep away from their school routines. While operating is referred to as physical or intellectual sports executed to fulfill the tasks and is rewarded in financial phrases.

One of the points I’m able to highlight is pocket money may be earned via young adults via running in the course of the college vacations. As an example, those who work as promoters in the shopping malls can earn RM5 an hour as their more profits. As a result, their Dad and mom’ burden can be decreased as teens do not want to invite for pocket money from their Mother and father for everyday prices.

Teenagers may even keep the cash they earn from running to shop for reference books and stationery that they need. Consequently, Dad and mom do not want to fear on the school charges as their youngsters are able to fork out on their own. young adults also can afford to buy matters that they long for inclusive of telephones, laptops, and shoes. In brief, young adults have to be allowed to paintings in the course of the college holidays because of the more profits they are able to get.how to use during

0 notes