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#karina is lovestruck
fayeforrosie · 1 year
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The Only One I Want
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Part 1
Karina x Fem! Reader
Karina knew she was pretty. She knew she had a chance with everyone, however, she was forever against any romantic relationships ever since she became an idol. Why would she want anyone when all they ever do is love her for her fame and looks? She knew she could never find anyone perfect for her, so she gave up on romance... until she met you
Word Count- 2.8k
Warnings- Mention of men 
Week after week Karina was cursed with yet another blind date set up by her company. She would urgently burst into her managers room, promptly falling down onto her knees, hands speedily racing against each other as if she was bound to make a fire, begging to go at least a month without any blind dates. 
To her dismay, however, not surprise, her manager would always shake her head firmly. “We need you to do this for us Karina. Do you have any idea how much attention would follow us if Yu Jimin was to find the perfect man?” She would say, and all Karina could do was sigh, walking out of the room with her head hung to her feet. 
It was another day in which her company had set up a date once again, this time, they informed her it would be at one of Seoul’s most popular art museums, where she would be meeting the man in about an hour from now. 
Karina couldn’t help but dread the upcoming event, knowing that her members got to stay back at the company and practice whatever they wished with their dance instructor, as there was no schedule for them this day. 
Karina wished she could be apart of that. She wished she could be in the dance practice room, and she reminisced with the feeling of laughter and sweat filling the air of the unreasonably hot place. It was all she wanted... to spend time with her members doing stupid “idol shit" on her days off. 
Yes, she was an idol, not a dating show contestant. Why couldn’t her company see this? 
And on top of everything, she had never been fond of dating, as every possible boy she’s met was only ever after her looks, or how much money was in her pockets. “Why don’t I take you home tonight”, she heard almost constantly after every date. It was upsetting to say the least, and as a result, Karina turned down any possible instance in which a boy could waltz their way into her heart. It wasn’t what she wanted. She wanted her members. She wanted to be on stage. She wanted to be in the studio. 
Instead, Karina found herself in the back of her managers car, mask almost suffocating her face as her hat floated just above her line of vision. Although she went on many dates, she was always forced to cover her identity, as her manager elucidated how bad it would be if the public was to see their sweetheart being accompanied by a new man every week. They wanted her to find the right one, then she could freely express herself to the public (though she knew it would never happen). 
“We’ve almost arrived, make sure you put your glasses on before you step out.” Her manger expressed from the passenger seat, where she responded with a small nod. If her mask was clipped on any tighter, she swore her manger would be able to see her frown seeping through. 
Only a minute later, the car pulled to a stop, just beside an almost identical car in the parking lot. Karina stepped out, her glasses now shielding her eyes as the door to the adjacent car rolled open just in front of her. 
“It’s nice to finally meet you, Jimin”, a voice could be heard in front of her. 
Karina raised her head, gaze connecting with the man in front of her. 
Lee Jae Wook, I never thought I would meet him, Karina thought to herself.
Despite the immense amount of meetings her company would assemble, they never would tell Karina which man she would be seeing, and she hated it. 
She remembers the time when she had shown up at an excessively fancy restaurant, only to be met with Mark Tuan seated comfortably in the chair ahead of her. Or when Kris Wu sat adequately on the most ugly patterned blanket, with a messy endeavor of a picnic by its side, bottles of alcohol spilling onto the grass, Kris’s attempt at getting Karina drunk and taking her home... god what a terrible date that was. 
“Call me Karina”, she said, ignoring the evident hand reaching out, awaiting to be shaken. Karina didn’t like when anyone other then her members, or family, was to call her by her birth name. She believed that only those who knew her personally were given the ability to call her by something so precious, not some random actor practically drooling as he soaked in her presence. 
“Yes of course, my apologies”, Jae Wook nodded and extended his arm for the girl to take, and if it wasn’t for Karina’s manager lightly pushing her into the man, she would have smacked his arm down instantly. 
With that, the two began into the museum, her arm loosely wrapped around his, and Jae Wook’s excessive amount of cologne being the only thing Karina could smell. 
God this is terrible. I need to get home.
“Welcome! It’s a pleasure to have you two joining us today!” An abnormally tall woman greeted them at the entrance. “Call me Ha-Eun! I’ll be your tour guide for today’s visit”, Karina shook her hand with a fake smile plastered onto her face. 
“Thank you”, Karina expressed, and followed the woman as she took them through security and into the main hall of the museum. The place was exceptionally beautiful, and Karina was sure that if she were to be accompanied by her members instead of this man, her experience would be one to remember. 
But she wasn’t. She was stuck clinging onto the man as they followed the tour guide into the first exhibit, knowingly peering at him as his eyes were trained on the woman’s ass while she walked ahead of them. 
In all honestly, Karina couldn’t care less. She could turn the corner and see Jae Wook kissing another woman and she wouldn’t even bat an eye. He could do whatever he wanted, as long as he didn’t bother her. Nevertheless, she knew that was impossible, because as soon as Karina thought he would leave her alone and take in his surroundings instead, he intertwined his fingers with her, and as she tried to pull away, he gave her hand a tug, almost as if he was warning her to not even try. 
To say Karina was uncomfortable was an understatement. The two of them followed the tour guide throughout the museum, and all Karina could think about was how sweaty and nasty the man’s hand felt in the grasp of hers. 
It has been a half an hour since they began to look around, and as they were stopped in front of a beautiful piece Karina couldn’t help but admire, Jae Wook spoke up. 
“I need to use the bathroom, would you mind staying here?” He directs his attention towards Karina. 
God yes. I'd be more than happy to. Please leave and never come back, Karina thought. 
“Sure.” 
The tour guide stepped in front of Jae Wook before he could make his way out. 
“I can show you the way! There isn’t one very close to here, it’s a bit of a walk.” She happily spoke, eyes almost unseen as a result of her never-resting smile. It must be tiring having that job, Karina thought, with having to keep a smile on your face without the slightest falter, even in the case of an inconvenience. She could never do that. 
“Thank you, I appreciate it”, Jae Wook spoke formally. “I’ll be right back”, he spoke once more, leaning down and planting a dry kiss atop of Karina’s forehead, and she almost gagged. 
The two made their way to the nearest bathroom, and there Karina stood, still at the fore of the painting. She couldn’t take her eyes off of it, it was truly beautiful. The way the colors complimented each line, as though the picture could truly come to live. It was remarkable. 
Being lost in her own thoughts, Karina failed to notice the woman that walked towards her and stood just about three feet away. 
“It’s beautiful isn’t.”
Karina’s ears chirped at the sound of the feminine voice, and she turned her head to glare at whoever had made the comment, however she was immediately met with the side profile of what seemed to be an angel. 
Karina had never seen anyone so captivating. The way your gaze was held beautifully on the artwork, where the piece couldn’t even compare to how prepossessing your visuals were. It was like she was at a loss of air, and she had never felt this feeling before. Karina has never been so lost for words, as it was usually the other way around, where the man was to look at Karina like they had never seen anyone as stunning as her.
Now, eyes still trained on your profile, she can understand how these men felt when they claimed to be awestruck. 
“...y- yeah”, Karina was still in a trance, making it hard for her to complete a full sentence. 
“I always come back to this piece whenever I visit, its magnificent”, you glanced over to her, and before you could meet her gaze, her eyes flashed back to the wall in an instant. 
“Um...”, she needed to keep talking to you, so she tried to start up a conversation, where she again was never the one to do so. 
“How often do you come here?” Karina asked, this time her eyes on you, and when you turned around to respond, her cheeks began to match the color of your beautifully pink lips. 
How could someone be so engaging? 
“Usually once a month, its like my happy place”, you allow a small chuckle to escape past your lips, as does Karina. 
“That’s really cool”, Karina smiles, her voice wavering as she tried to keep calm, and she continued.
“Do you have any other works that you like?”
Karina watched as your eyes scanned the wall full of beautiful artwork, deciding if there was another that met up to the standard of the one you stood ahead of, however you shake your head. 
“I love them all, but this one is my favorite”, you smile and Karina could practically hear her heart skip a beat. 
Karina has never felt the feeling of butterflies in her stomach until now. She has never been so captivated by someone’s presence until now. She has never wanted to hold a conversation with a stranger until now. You made her want to do everything at this very moment. Karina wanted to grab your hand and walk you outside just to continue to talk about your love for art. She could listen to you all day.
Could a woman feel this way for a woman? Karina never thought of woman in that type of sense, as she was only ever set up with men her entire live, so it was inevitable that her heart was trained to find attraction towards the gender. Maybe meeting you thirty seconds ago was a sign that her heart could possibly open up to someone. And not just anyone... a woman. 
“Want to know why I like this painting so much?” You asked, and began to move a bit closer to her body, still keeping a comfortable distance. 
Come closer, Karina thought. 
“Why?” 
You smiled and leaned in, "because I made it”, you uttered faintly. 
And there it was. The exact moment that Karina determined she could truly find romance in somebody. Nobody had ever made Karina feel such a thing, and she thought she might as well die alone, since nobody had ever held her attention. But she was wrong. Here you were, in the flesh, completely ripping the heart of Yu Jimin out of her entire body, unbeknownst to you. 
“Are you serious?” That was all Karina could muster out, otherwise she might as well shout to the world that she found the one for her. 
“Yeah. It was accepted into the gallery about six months ago. Cool right?” 
God you had no idea how many butterflies were roaming the district of Karina insides. 
“Y- yeah... that’s amazing”, she smiled and went on. “What’s your name?” 
You gave her a warm-hearted smile and pointed over to the painting, where Karina was now faced with sign just bellow the piece. 
Y/n Yl/n
How beautiful, was as Karina could think. 
“How about you? What’s your name?” 
It was natural that you didn’t recognize the woman, as she was dressed in the least revealing clothes there ever was to be, a mask on her face accompanied by the hat she had on in the car, and lastly a pair of circular glasses. She didn’t expect you to know who she was with such a disguise, but she hoped you were to realize once she took her mask and glasses off. 
Maybe if Karina showed you who she really was, you would end up being a huge fan, and immediately want to continue talking to her. Nobody could ever pass up on the chance of becoming close with an idol, so it should be the same regarding you, right? 
Karina allowed her thoughts to race ahead of herself, and she pulled her mask down, her glasses following. 
She saw when it clicked in your mind, that you were being faced with the Karina of Aespa, one of the most famous fourth generation idols there is to be. She felt pride, and for the first time, she was happy someone was to recognize who she was. 
Nonetheless, exactly opposite of what Karina had thought would happen, your lips turned upwards into a fair smile, and you nodded your deliberately. 
“Ah”, you stated, “Yu Jimin. I’ve seen your face all over.” 
Is that it? Is that all you had to say? You’re not going to ask for a picture? Or even bow? Karina was beyond confused, she had never met anyone who would react with such ease.
In addition, Karina noticed that her brain, usually trained to correct anyone that was to call her by her birth name, refused to tell you the name in which she preferred for others to call her. In fact, she found herself preferring you to call her Jimin apposed to Karina. You were already special enough to her.   
“So you know who I am?” Karina spoke. 
“Doesn’t everybody?” You laughed. “You are even more beautiful in person, it’s surprising.” 
Hearing those words come out of your mouth, Karina couldn’t help but bring her mask back up to her face. She couldn’t let you see how flustered you made her. It was dehumanizing. 
“Oh... thank you.” She looked anywhere but to you. “You’re beautiful as well.” 
You chuckled and looked down just as she did, and if anyone was to take a look over at your interaction, it’s possible they would think the two of you were to not even be associating with each other. 
But, before you could thank the girl, your eyes glanced over at a man who was making his way towards Karina, and you recognized him to be the one you had seen her with preceding your approach. 
“I think it’s time for me to go now, I believe your boyfriend is here for you.” 
Karina’s eyebrows furrowed, her lips frowning at the thought of you leaving so soon, but she turned around to see what you had been referring to, and was met with Jae Wook and the tour guide side by side, making their way towards her.
“No! He’s not my b-” Karina turned around to reassure you, however, her breath hitched, eyes almost even watering as she found that you were instantly gone. 
She felt like a child that had lost their parents at a crowded event, searching aimlessly throughout the area, double... triple looking around to see where you might have gone. But it was too late. 
Jae Wook had then came up by her side and took her hand, and Karina couldn’t even protest, she was too upset. Her mind was somewhere else at the moment. 
She followed Jae Wook, eyes trained on the wooden floor as she thought of you. 
She thought about how heavenly your voice was, like music played softly in her ears, and how magnificent your side profile was to look at. She could stare at it all day if she could. She needed to see your face again. She needed to find you. 
You were the one for her, she determined it. And she will not leave this museum unless it was hand and hand with you 
~
Hi everyone!! I’m backkk!!! I’m not sure exactly how many parts this will have, but I’ll just keep going until I feel the story is complete haha. Stay tuned for part two my loves!! 💕💕
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iichaeyj · 2 years
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may i request stuco president gf karina hcs?
student president karina headcanons . . . ♡
PAIRING: karina x gn!reader
GENRE: fluff
WARNINGS: none
WORD COUNT: 0.5k
A/N: ik aespa well enough, but i don't normally keep up with them 24/7, but i hope you like this! tysm for requesting <3
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okay but i feel like karina suits this role so well
she's the smart, independent student president who is well respected by all her fellow classmates
and bc she's so respected, she sorta becomes unknowingly intimidating to others
she's just so good at everything it makes ppl scared of her, yk?
and she tries hard to keep up that image of a strong, confident leader
and tbh, she always does
but in reality, she's actually just a lovestruck student who's head over heels for you
like she looks so composed as she reads her book near the front of the class, but she's actually trying to focus on you, who's sitting right in front of her, without making it obvious
she's normally so calm and collected, but smile at her and she completely loses her composure
as much as i think she'd be shy, though, i also think she knows what she wants
and as nervous as she gets around you, she figures she needs to make the first move
so she tries her best to swallow her nerves and try and talk to you
and as the two of you began getting closer, she confessed to you <3
i imagine her being rlly shy, but trying to remain confident as she tells you how she feels
she's so cute :(
and as your girlfriend, i think she'd be lowkey about it but also not ??
like when she's giving speeches or smth in front of the school, she'll make sure to look at you and give you a smile she doesn't give anyone else
just smart gf karina who only has eyes for u <3
but she also wouldn't like to outwardly be affectionate towards you in front of all the other students (yk her reputation)
but that doesn't mean she'd try and hide the fact that she loves you
and i think she'd be very affectionate in private
like she'd love whining to you about how she missed you or ask you for hugs all the time when you two are alone
and other things she'd do as your girlfriend include studying with you, giving you gifts, and holding your pinkie whenever one of you is nervous
expanding on that
if you were ever struggling with a certain subject, i think karina would offer to tutor you
she'd spend half the time teaching you and half the time telling you how cute you are when you're focused :(
and she's definitely a gift giver
she just likes doing small things to show that she appreciates you!!
and another thing she likes to do is small acts of affection
imagine she's nervous about making an announcement as the student president one day
and you always manage to calm her down
so she just goes to you and holds your pinky, something that isn't a large display of affection and yet, gives her the reassurance that she needs
as long as she knows you're by her side, she's perfectly fine tbh
sweet, smart gf karina is all im thinking about now :(
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scyllawon · 1 year
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LOVESTRUCK PROFILES: LOVE CLUB ♡
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MEET YOUR CUPIDS ♡
YN (@/cupidcore & @/loserlover)
3rd Year Student, President & Founder resident matchmaker at Decelis ♡ 95% success rate, only two of her past matches have failed. doesn't get along with the Decelis F4, but is almost always partnered up with them for school work.
GIGI (@/honeybun) insp. by @/seungiepup
3rd Year Student, Vice-President pretty friend #1. known for her kind personality & strong morals, never hesitates to stand up for what she thinks is right. dated lee heeseung for 2 months back in middle school, the longest out of his past relationships. lives next door to jay.
NADIA (@/luvmaze)
3rd Year Student, Secretary the clingy best friend. has a different crush every week, but always refuses to make a move. a little insecure abt her relationship with the others bc she was the last to join the friend group. youngest of the friend group.
CHAERIN (@/cherrybae) insp. by @/iichaeyj
3rd Year Student, Treasurer pretty friend #2 ♡ has never not been voted prettiest in her year since the 6th grade. although she may seem intimidating to fellow students, she’s very sweet to her close friends. a classic tsundere, but will never hesitate to do anything if someone she cares for asks her too. works on the school broadcast with sunoo and jungwon.
KARINA (@/rocketpuncher)
4th Year Student, Social Media Manager mom #1 of the group. has been dating aeri since their first year at decelis.
AERI (@/hotgirlaeri)
4th Year Student, Client Coordinator mom #2 of the group. has been dating karina since their first year at decelis.
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TAGLIST: OPEN; send an ask to be added
@luvhyun3 @fairyluvsite @loves0ft @sunooze @heartkatemiddleton
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bubbletaeeee · 2 years
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Masterlist ✨💛
I write for gender neutral and female/feminine readers. I have some boundaries or rules which I have pinned on my blog 😊
Smut ~ 🔥 Angst ~ ⚡️ Fluff ~ ☁️
Itzy
Yeji
I’d Like It If You Stayed ☁️
Lia
Ryujin
G!P Dom!Ryujin x Sub!Fem!Reader 🔥☁️
Chaeryeong
Yuna
Twice
Nayeon
Jeongyeon
Momo
Sana
Jihyo
Mina
Dahyun
Chaeyoung
Lovestruck Sweethearts ☁️
Tzuyu
Blackpink
Jisoo
Jennie
Special Birthday Surprise - Jennie Kim x Sub!Fem!Reader 🔥
Rosé
Lisa
Mamamoo
Solar
Moonbyul
Whee In
Hwasa
Aespa
Aespa Distracts Gamer S/O For Cuddles ☁️
Karina
The Tease ⚡️☁️
We Were A Secret ☁️
In My Arms Only 🔥☁️
Fatally Reunited ⚡️☁️
Giselle
G!P Dom!Giselle x Sub!Fem!Reader 🔥
Winter
Insecure Not So Little Secret 🔥☁️
Jealousy ⚡️☁️
Opposites Attract ⚡️☁️
Her Possession 🔥
Mistletoe No Kisses ☁️
Love Is The Saviour ⚡️☁️
Ningning
My Distraction 🔥
Dreamcatcher
Cockwarming With Dreamcatcher 🔥☁️
JiU
You Can’t Hide Love ☁️
SuA
Siyeon
I’m Better For You 🔥☁️
Handong
Yoohyeon
Dami
Gahyeon
Loona
Vivi
Yves
Jinsoul
Haseul
Kim Lip
Chuu
Heejin
G!P Dom!Heejin x Sub!Fem!Reader 🔥
Hyunjin
Gowon
Choerry
Olivia Hye
Yeojin
(G)I-DLE
Miyeon
Minnie
Soojin
Soyeon
Yuqi
Shuhua
Everglow
E:U
Sihyeon
Mia
Onda
Aisha
I Missed You ☁️
Yiren
Purple Kiss
Jieun
Goeun
Dosie
Pretty Girl ☁️⚡️🔥
Ireh
Yuki
Chaein
Swan
BTS
Jin
Suga
J-Hope
RM
Jimin
V
Jungkook
TXT
Yeonjun
Soobin
Beomgyu
Taehyun
Huening Kai
Stray Kids
Bangchan
Lee Know
Changbin
Hyunjin
Han
Felix
Seungmin
I.N
💛💛💛💛💛💛💛💛💛
~Thank You For Your Support~
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sensitively-taken · 2 years
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ii. butterflies — choi soobin
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synopsis. you’d never understood it before. the shy glances, whispered words of affection, traded glances that only you two were privy to understanding. then, a blue boy had waltzed into your life, drawing you in with his warm eyes, his wide smile, his sweet laugh, his cool gaze—his everything. butterflies had bloomed in your chest, and you’d let them, even though you’d known they’d eventually be ripped out. leaving you with a gaping hole where your heart used to be.
pairing(s). choi soobin x gender-neutral!reader ft. soobin x karina & (mentions of) soobin x yeonjun
genre(s). angst, coming-of-age, drama, (minor) fluff, highschool au, romance.
warnings. alcohol consumption, allusions to cheating, cheating, mentions of blood & gore, partying, underage drinking. rated PG 15.
word count. 3.2k (3227)
taglist. @yeonyeonyeonjun​​ if you’d like to be tagged in each part when i post them, feel free to send me an ask or dm me!!
listen to! odds, NIKI ⭑ so much better, tinashe ⭑ you right, doja cat ⭑ fool for you, snoh aelegra ⭑ cherry, rina sawayama
notes. the second part of heartbreak haven AAAAAAAAAA!!! imo this is the most angst-filled part (for almost everyone involved), but it also explains a lot of went unexplained in the last part. sorry gyu but this series rlly is just a soobin, yeonjun, y/n love triangle and he’s the guy just happy to be involved LOL but we’ll got more into that in his part i would say i hope you guys enjoy, but it’s not exactly the easiest thing to enjoy, so i hope you at least have fun reading it! ♡♡
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What did it take to fall in love?
Was it a momentary glance? The stars’ alignment? Prettily strung-together words? Or, was it much more than that? More difficult than that? (More sinister than that?)
Until you’d met Choi Soobin, that question was a rhetorical one—not because it couldn’t be answered, but because you’d thought you would never be able to answer it. Love had been the last thing on your mind—discarded and pushed to the deepest crevices of your brain—so you’d never thought such a silly, rhetorical question could've caused you so much pain.
(Oh, boy, how it could.)
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The butterflies in your chest fluttered to life, for the very first time, when you locked eyes with Soobin.
His eyes were pools—dark, dark, dark pools. There were rings and layers to the velvety chocolate in his eyes, lined by sweet caramel dripping with love (lies!). His pupils, so dark and so wide, blended in with the deep pool—hiding to serve as the final prize. As the corners of his eyes crinkled ever so slightly, and his pupils grew, you realised you wanted to swim in those pools. Drown in them, if he would let you. Die in them.
The butterflies, flapping their wings tenderly, gently—like the love blossoming in you was so fragile it could break (it could, and would, for it was more fragile than the daintiest of glasses)—agreed.
Tearing your eyes away from him and back to your teacher, you liked to imagine the flutter the butterflies’ wings made was a song specially crafted for you. A song that would ring in your ears, caress his, and tie you two together with a knot.
The thought, so silly and so lovestruck, brought a grin to your face—one that didn’t go unnoticed by three pairs of eyes.
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The next time you saw Soobin, the butterflies beat their wings faster.
It was early October, still warm in the morning with a slight breeze every so often, so your gym class was held outside—something that most people didn’t enjoy. Nothing was flattering, nor gracious, about running laps under the beating sun, with only a flimsy gust of wind to cool you down.
But, he managed to make that class look so graceful—like he was floating on clouds. The sun’s harsh rays, that wore everyone else out, complimented his cream skin and made him gleam. The few gusts always managed to catch his nape, sending a brief breeze down his sweaty neck. Even the sweat (the salty tears! The salty tears, planted by those before you, that you failed to notice) beading on his forehead and jaw accentuated those areas, sculpting him like he was made by Aphrodite herself. Maybe he was. Maybe he was a Greek god in disguise, choosing to dwell among mere mortals to bless you all with his ethereal looks.
I’m definitely being blessed, you thought, as you finished a lap around the track and he sent a suave wink your way. The butterflies, agreeing, challenged your heart to see who could beat faster.
The race was tight, but as he slowed down his pace to match yours, your heart won—screaming from the effort.
“Hi,” he said, wiping away at sweat and grinning, “I don’t think I’ve seen you around before. I’m Soobin.”
For a second, the butterflies faltered. Had he not noticed it—the cocooning in your chests the moment you two locked eyes? Or, had the caterpillars only crawled into your chest, gnawing away at your flesh, till they found a home there? (Was his chest not warm enough for caterpillars to cocoon, was the question you failed to wonder—failed to ask.)
Then, his grin widened, eyes crinkling like they had before and none of that mattered.
“_____,” you mumbled out, suddenly as nervous as a schoolchild talking to their crush and as tongue-tied.
“_____,” he repeated, singing every syllable like your name was the prettiest song, “Nice to meet you, _____.”
“Nice to meet you too,” you singsonged back, a slow smile stretching your lips.
(It—him, the butterflies, the beginning of what was about to come—was not nice. But, how could you have known?)
He stretched out his hand toward you, a wide grin on his face. A crease formed between your brows, and you shook your head.
“Wanna compare hand sizes?” he asked, giggling a bit at his own question. “I know it’s really cheesy, but—"
“Don’t worry about it, Soobin,” you cut him off, a laugh of your own tumbling past your lips. “I get it.”
You didn’t. You truly didn’t. But, his eyes, his smile, his entire being had a hold on you that you couldn’t explain. All you knew was you were willing to give this boy your entire heart, even if it meant never getting it back again.
So, what was the deal with giving him your hand?
As he put his hand against yours, you could feel every ridge of his palm. There were rough callouses on his flesh, probably from his time spent playing basketball for the school team, but they felt smooth to you. His hand, large and warm, squeezed yours—sending the butterflies dancing and soaring, breaking out of your chest and into a tiny nook in your heart.
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Your heart felt like a chrysalis. With every stray glance, whispered conversation, and shy laugh, it beat and rustled, as the butterflies shifted inside—itching to be let out. It stung, sent a bone-deep ache through your body, but you loved it. The ache was a reminder of your love, after all.
There was a time the chrysalis almost shattered, a time you almost lost your heart.
“Choi Yeonjun?” Soobin’s eyebrows narrowed, a wary expression on his face. “Yeah, I’ve heard of him… Why?”
You only studied his guarded features for a second (you should’ve studied them longer, dissected them till you found the answer), before smiling cautiously. “He’s my best friend. I promised to introduce him to the guy I‘ve been ditching him for.”
He laughed his warm, rich laugh that you loved so much (but you didn’t notice the strain in this particular time). An eyebrow raised, he leaned across his centre console. “_____,” he singsonged, the way he always did, “You’ve been ditching him for me? Tsk, tsk.”
“Shut up.” You rolled your eyes, but you didn’t mean it. You never did. “He’s been wanting to meet you, since I’ve only called you ‘blue boy.’”
Soobin’s laughter ceased slowly, his eyes narrowing. “Blue boy?”
Closing the distance between you two, you ruffled his dark blue hair. (you didn’t notice the note of discomfort on his face as) You smiled brightly. “Yeah, it’s a cute, little nickname I gave you. ‘Suits you perfectly.”
“Yeah,” he chuckled, quietly and hollowly, “But, I’m the only boy with blue hair in our school. I’m pretty sure Yeonjun knows who I am already.”
You snorted, giving his nose a little boop before moving away—butterflies hammering away in your heart, the chrysalis, all the while. “Well, you’re not the only blue-haired boy I know. I could be talking about anyone, for all he knows.”
He nodded, but his gaze was growing distant—flickering towards his rearview mirror. “So, when do you want us to meet? I’m not free this afternoon. Jimin has an important recital she wants me to attend.”
At the mention of his girlfriend, the butterflies ceased their flapping and your heart almost dropped into your stomach.
You’d known, from the second you two locked eyes till now, that he had a girlfriend. Yoo Jimin, a kind and cheerful brunette who mostly kept to herself, was dating Choi Soobin, star of your school’s basketball team. In theory, the couple didn’t make sense. How could someone who kept to herself date such an outgoing and popular guy? But, watching the way she doted on him and the way he smiled the widest around her, you knew there was no space for anyone else in either of their hearts.
(It was no wonder the butterflies were only in your heart.)
The chrysalis was struggling to stay intact, but you urged your heart to hold on—to not give up on your butterflies, just yet. (Would things have turned out differently, if you’d let them just die?) “Right, Jimin’s recital. I, I’ll, uh, ask Yeonjun when he’s free. Then, we can arrange something. Jimin can come too, if you want.”
(Bad idea, bad idea, bad idea.)
He smiled, an uneasy one that mirrored how you were feeling. “Sur—”
And then, the bell went off and you two were whisked away from each other again, back into your usual routines.
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A hard shell grew around your chrysalis.
Mentions of Soobin made the butterflies sing a song with their wings and shield themselves from whatever words were uttered at the same time. The sight of Jimin slowed their wings, almost to a complete standstill, while the vines holding the chrysalis intertwined with your lungs. Any time Soobin and Yeonjun were within the same vicinity, you would seize up, the butterflies crawling up your throat until you could taste their velvety wings and nothing else.
It hurt, guarding your love for Soobin and burying it deep down inside, but you couldn’t think of any other way to preserve it.
(Maybe you shouldn’t have.)
The only times you could break down the shell, bare your love in its purest form, was when it was you and him alone. You would hide your love in the curve of your smile, tucking it in the folds carefully so he—and, he alone—was the only one who saw it. Many times, between exchanged glances, you would confess your love over and over again—the words bleeding from your eyes. To others, your lips were straight, expressionless and empty. But, to him, they were constantly moving, twisting, to sing a song of your effervescent love.
(Sometimes, you wondered if he even received your love—if he let you undress it before him, in the first place.)
So, your chrysalis’s shell nearly melted when, one late night shift, Yeonjun asked, “Since when were you and Soobin friends?”
Blue Diner was empty, it almost always was once the moon was high up in the sky, save for you, Yeonjun, and your coworker in the back. Yet, still, Yeonjun’s words managed to shock you so much that you lost count of the money in your hand, groaning before you started all over again.
“Twenty-two thousand, twenty-three thousand—”
“_____?” he asked again, eyebrows raised, “If you don’t want to answer, don’t. But, don’t pretend I didn’t say anything. Please.”
Your eyes flickered between him and the money in your hand. Putting it aside, you rested your chin on the cash register. “I wasn’t pretending you didn’t say anything… I, I just didn’t know how to answer. It’s a bit complicated.”
He nodded, veiling his eyes before you could figure out what the disappointment in his eyes meant.
“To be honest… I don’t know how it started,” you shrugged, a smile stretching your lips without you even realising it, “It’s kinda like us. One day, we’re strangers, and then the next, we’re closer than ever. Like… magic almost. A magical bond.”
“A magical bond?” he whispered sardonically, more to himself than you. He could already feel the bitterness seeping into his heart, something he told himself he wouldn’t allow to happen. Yeonjun cleared his throat and asked, despite the obvious answer in your eyes, “You don’t… you don’t have feelings for him, right?”
“What?” Again, his question caught you off guard, stealing your breath from you for a moment. Your chest expanded with every passing moment, giving the butterflies room to panic around in your heart, until you couldn’t take it anymore. Letting go of the breath you were holding in, you collapsed your lungs, sending the butterflies into a temporary state of orderliness. “No, no. He has a girlfriend, come on.”
“If he didn’t though?”
Your eyes, which were focused on the register, slowly met Yeonjun’s. Like always, it was hard to decipher what was in his eyes. All you could make out was a warning, and the deep sorrow he always carried around with him.
What was he warning you about? (Why didn’t you listen?)
“I… I don’t. Him having a girlfriend doesn’t affect that.” You smiled through your lie—such a feeble one, that you knew both of you could see through.
But, as he sighed deeply, it was easy for you to pretend he didn’t know the truth. That he couldn’t see the love practically dancing in your irises. And, it was easy for him to pretend he didn’t know the truth. That he couldn’t feel the faint flutter of butterfly wings in his own chest.
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The butterflies were growing tired of your heart. They wanted to fly, to soar, to explore the skies. But, behind a shell, and a chrysalis so weak and tender, you kept them hidden away. And, as time went on, they grew restless and impatient.
They needed to be let out.
(And, they would be.)
One day, Soobin offered them the release they so desperately wanted. With a smile you hadn’t seen before, eyes that’d previously been reserved for Jimin and Jimin only, he asked you if you needed a ride home.
“What about Jimin?” you asked, glancing over your shoulder like she was there right behind you—tutting at your eagerness to see her boyfriend. “Don’t you usually drive her home?”
His smile widened. “Don’t worry about her.”
(You should’ve. Should’ve worried so much about her. But, you trusted Soobin.) Nodding once, you whispered back, “Sure. Walk me there from my last class? It’s World History with Mr. Jeon.”
“Mhm.” You weren’t sure, but as you stared at his smile again, there was a glimpse of the love you’d given him hidden in his smile’s curve. The butterflies beat their wings faster at that. They were ready to soar.
And, later, in the backseat of his car, they soared. (Oh, they soared alright.)
Soobin leaned in close to you, thumb dangerously close to your lips, and whispered, “You know, since I first saw you in that class, I liked you. ‘Couldn’t get you off my mind.”
Your breath hitched, the butterflies fluttered at an alarming speed, and you couldn’t take your eyes off his lips. Cupping the side of his face, you asked, “But, what about Jimin? I… This is wrong. You’re hurt—”
“I told you not to worry about her,” he smiled a reassuring smile, holding the hand on your jaw, “We broke up. To be honest, our relationship wasn’t doing well for a long time. Even before you entered the picture. We were telling ourselves we still loved each other when that was the furthest thing from the truth. I let go of her because… the person I really love is you. I love you, _____.”
All at once, your lungs filled with air once again, and the butterflies tore out of your chrysalis your lungs, your being. They danced around you, their wings flapping like they’d never before, as you whispered your confession back to Soobin. Wide smiles stretched your lips, he whispered soft words in your ear, and then he kissed you. Soobin kissed you, slow and steady, to the tune of the butterflies’ wings. And, though, there was a hole where your heart used to be, you were happier than you’d ever been.
(You didn’t know that happiness came at a price—a heavy price.)
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You didn’t have to worry about the butterflies anymore. They were out of your chest, soaring out in the open for everyone to see, just like they’d wanted.
In your chest, there was a huge hole, a torn mass of flesh and blood that used to house them, but every one of Soobin’s kisses stitched a piece of it back together.
Soobin’s kisses were a remedy. He kissed you between classes, in empty hallways no one could spot you two in. He kissed you in his car during lunch, teasing you about how flustered you would get. He kissed your knuckles when no one was watching, smiling at you as he did so. Your forehead, your cheeks, the spots behind your ears—there was almost nowhere Soobin didn’t kiss.
(You didn’t know he sucked a bit of life out of you with every pepper of his kisses.)
And, just as they remedied you, they hurt you as well.
One October morning, when the air was damp but the sun wasn’t shining, Soobin pulled you aside to kiss you before one of your classes. It was chaste, yet filled with so much love. So much love that you didn’t notice someone was watching you two, till he was ripped away from you.
A teary Jimin glanced between you two, lips wobbling. As your eyes focused on her, she set her lip into a grim, straight line and wiped the lone tear that escaped her eye. “What the fuck? What’s going on here?”
Your eyebrows furrowed. “What do you mean?”
“Again?” Slowly, another tear slid down Jimin’s cheek and this time she didn’t bother wiping it away. She turned away from you, anger growing in the depths of her eyes. “You told me last time was a mistake, Bin! That he kissed you!”
If you still had a heart, you were sure it would’ve fallen into the depths of your stomach. But, you didn’t. So, you could only stand there, paralysed, as Soobin refused to look into either of your eyes.
“Jimin, I can explain. _____ kissed—”
“Shut up!” All you could see was her back, but you could feel the waves of anger rippling off from her. “You can’t fool me this time, Soobin. I, I talked to him the other day—can you believe it? I never thought I’d say that.”
Soobin’s eyes widened, and—for the first time—you felt a different, darker type of fluttering within you at the sight.
He stuttered out, “W-wait, Jimin, don’t—”
“And, you know what he… your ‘friend’ told me?” Jimin turned back to you, her eyes red and her face flushed. “He saw you two kissing in the back of your car last week!”
You couldn’t breathe. You couldn’t. The chrysalis’ vines had left punctures in your lungs, the butterflies had filled your throat with mush, and your heart was no longer. Was this—this toe-curling, stomach-fluttering—feeling heartbreak? But, how could your heart break when it wasn’t there to begin with?
Tears pricked your eyes, as you touched your lips—the lips Soobin had kissed. “You,” your voice broke halfway through, tears and butterfly fluid choking you up, “y-you lied to me? You never broke up with Jimin?”
Soobin’s eyes landed on yours, pleading—and, though you hated to admit it, you wanted to forgive him—and wide. But, they didn’t stay on yours. They flickered back to Jimin’s, just as pleading and as wide too.
“_____, Jimin, I’m—”
You had had enough.
Wiping away at the tears dotting your cheeks, you turned your back on Soobin and extended a hand in Jimin’s direction. You’d never thought you would be here, picking Jimin over Soobin, but here you were. She accepted your hand, throwing one last glare in her boyfriend’s—ex-boyfriend’s—direction before attempting a smile at you.
And, as you two walked off together, tears still streaming down your faces, you knew you would never be able to feel those butterflies again.
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i. autumn breeze | iii. blushed cheeks & burned hearts
copyright 2022 soobisms, all rights reserved. no translations or reposts of any form allowed.
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la-belle-crawford · 7 years
Note
Who are some of your favorite actresses?
Oh boy! Are you referring to OH, modern ones or both? I’m such a lovestruck fan of actresses, so this list might be a bit long! So, in no particular order….
Modern
Angelina Jolie, Rachel Weisz, Helen Mirren, Winona Ryder, Emma Thompson, Michelle Pfieffer, Susan Sarandon, Emma Watson, Olivia Williams, Keira Knightley, Natalie Portman, Saoirse Ronan, Kirsten Dunst, Lily James, Nicole Kidman, Amy Adams and Gillian Anderson
OH
Pola Negri, Elizabeth Taylor, Marilyn Monroe, Mary Philbin, Natalie Wood, Vivien Leigh, Audrey H, Luise Rainier, Carole Lombard, Rita Hayworth, Bette Davis, Greta Garbo, both Dehavilland sisters, Clara Bow, Kim Novak, Gene Tierney, Kate Hepburn, Sophia Loren, Roz Russell, Hedy Lamarr, Eleanor Parker, Sylvia Sidney, Talluluah Bankhead, Jean Simmons, Linda Darnell, Claudia Cardinale, Anna Karina, Betty Compson and Jean Arthur
These are all the ones I can think of off the top of my head! Thank you so much for asking, I love getting questions related to cinema in general! And you are one of my favourite blogs ever
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fayeforrosie · 1 year
Text
Finding You
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Part 2
Karina x Fem! Reader
Karina does wonders in order to find the girl who has made her heart flutter for the first ever time
Part 2 to The Only One I Want
Word count- 2.7k i think
Warnings- Honestly nothing just Karina being lovesick
It was unfortunate, to say the least. 
Unlike Karina’s wishes of walking out of the museum hand and hand with you, the girl she had recently labeled as the first ever person she romantically fell for, she ended up in the grasp of her fake date instead. 
It was a terrible date, aside from meeting you, because before she met you, she had only been looking to go home and see her members once again, and after meeting you, she had only been looking for your figure.
You were haunting her.
While Karina walked throughout the museum, she pictured every person in her line of vision to have the same outfit and hair as you, and when she made eye contact, she swore she could see your eyes, half closed in a cheesy smile that she could die on the spot by just looking at it. 
She hunted for you, thinking it as a mission, in which if she did not find you by the end of the date, then she would fail and be eliminated from whatever imaginary scheme she created in her conceptual mind. 
But, she failed, because now she was back at her dorm, slumped on the couch as her members surrounded her, a response to Karina's sudden emergency meeting called abruptly as soon as she got back. 
“Ok so... how do you expect to find her?” Karina’s fellow member, Aeri, questioned to her. 
Karina had told everyone about the meeting the two of you had, and how it completely changed her perception of romance. She described the feeling of butterflies roaming her stomach, and how her heart sank to her feet each time your voice made an appearance. 
The members were utterly surprised, as they did not expect their leader to find somebody so promising so quickly, especially since they knew her feelings regarding her love life, and on top of that, the person she was head over heels for was a girl. It was definitely not what the members expected, but they were happy for her in the end. 
“I don’t know!” Karina shouted wistfully, evidently upset at the lack of knowledge she had as a response to the question. 
“I know her name, and I already tried looking it up on Instagram but I couldn’t find anything. I even downloaded Tiktok to see if she was on it but I found nothing.” 
If it was even possible, Karina sunk lower into the couch she sat atop, her hand gripping the sides of her head as she sighed in annoyance. 
“Well you said that she said she goes to the museum at least once a month, maybe you could go a couple times starting next mo-”
“I can’t wait that long! I need to see her as soon as possible!” Karina exclaimed, cutting another one of her friends, Winter, off as she stood up precipitously. 
“Well that is going to be hard Jimin”, another member, Ningning, informed the leader. “She’s not going to just pop up out of nowhere. You need to find her yourself.” 
Karina knew this was true. She knew that she couldn’t just rub her hands together and pray that God would bring you to her as soon as she was to step out of the company building. She had to find you herself.
“So what do you guys suggest I do?”  
At that, the three other members stopped to think over their leader’s questions, attempting to come up with a plan that would ultimately bring you to her, but all their minds went blank. That is until Winter spoke up. 
“Why don’t you go back to the museum and talk to a staff member about her. They probably have some type of background on her since her art is displayed there, don’t you think?” 
Winter couldn’t resist the smile when she realized that this idea was actually a good one, seeing that her three friends turned their heads to her immediately, an aghast expression painted across their faces as a result of the one good idea Winter was to come up with in the past three years. 
Winter was never the one to speak out her ideas, as she wasn’t very good with them, but this time, she was prideful, because when Aeri tackled her onto the floor and shouted how great of an idea it was, Winter could tell the others thought so as well. 
“Winter I’m proud of you, but very surprised nobody else thought of that”, Ninging chuckled. 
“It is a good idea, and exactly what I am going to do!” 
Karina fell asleep that night with her heart beating out of her chest, her anticipation eating her insides up as she imagined another meeting with you. 
Karina thought about how pretty you would look for the second time, and how perfect your smile was going to be when she finally saw it again. Her mind wandered with all the possibilities in which your second interaction could lead too. The girl thought about how life would be with you accompanying her right arm as you both walked through the doors into yet another art museum, because she knew you loved them so much. 
The leader only ended up getting a few hours of rest, and once the light of the sun began to seep through the confines of her dorm room, she instantly bounced out of her bed, antithetical to her members as they groaned to her newfound liveliness in the morning. 
Karina was never a morning person, but thinking of meeting you once again was exactly what woke her right up, no hesitation as she ripped the blankets off of her body and quickly dressed in comfy clothing. 
She had a schedule later on with her group members, with a few meetings to accompany their vocal training today, so it was crucial that she went first thing in the morning to the museum as soon as it opened, giving her enough time to race back to her company building. 
Karina called up one of her drivers to bring her back to the previous destination he had taken her to yesterday, and once he finally got here in the most agonizingly slow manner (he was going as fast as he could, but to Karina, no time can be wasted), Karina suddenly threw her body into the back seat, informing her driver to drive as fast as he could.
It hadn’t taken long for them to get there, the consequence of her driver speeding through yellow lights and going twenty miles over the required limit. Nevertheless, to Karina it was as if the ride was a twelve hour flight from Korea to the states. 
“Perfect just park right here please”, Karina ordered her driver, the leader’s hands glued to her seatbelt, ready at any moment to press down and free herself. Once the car finally came to a stop, the girl raced to open the door, stumbling onto her feet as she swiftly made her way inside. 
She searched for a worker that was close by, noticing the lack of them, until she finally found a middle-aged man wearing the same suit she had recognized from yesterday. 
“Excuse me!” Karina shouted, speedily walking towards him, although it might have been hard for him to hear as her mask was tight around her face, similar to her situation yesterday, an attempt to cover her identity. 
The man turned his head once Karina’s voice registered in his mind, and he gave the girl a toothy grin before allowing her to speak whatever was bothering her. 
“I um”, Karina paused for a second, breathing in and out as she tried to catch her breath, a repercussion of how fast she ran over to his figure. 
“I am wondering if you have any information regarding the artist the created that painting”, Karina pointed over to the piece she admired with you yesterday, her cheeks already warming at the thought of it.
The man followed her gaze onto the artwork, noticing what the girl was mentioning. 
“Y/n Yl/n?” 
“Yes!” Karina cried, almost instantly after the announcement of your beautiful name. God your name was perfect to her. 
“Um...”, he paused, “I don’t exactly know much about her, but my boss does I’m pretty sure. Would you like me to take you to him?” 
Karina smiled politely, trying her best not to allow her excitement to showcase itself in front of the man. 
“That would be amazing, thank you.” 
And with that, the man made his way towards the back of the building, Karina trailing him as if she were a lost puppy following its owner. He stopped in front of a duel set of door, extending his arms out to push himself through, holding it open with a nod as Karina nearly slipped by him. 
“Good morning Mr. Choi”, Karina heard the worker speak from behind her, bowing as he did. 
“Good morning”, he greeted nonchalantly, a coffee in his right hand as the man’s eyes stayed trained on his phone below him.
How rude, Karina thought. 
“We have a guest visitor who requests time to speak with you. I suggest you accept.” 
At that, the boss raised his head just before Karina removed her glasses and rid her face mask. His eyes met the leader’s, and almost immediately sat up straight and brushed the crumbs off of his hideous attire 
“Ah, Yu Jimin, so you’ve come back”, the man nods his head as an indication for her to sit, however Karina stays where she is, not wanting the man to think she would stay for long. She did not want small talk, all she wanted was to get your information and find you as soon as she could. 
“I was wondering if you have any information on the artist who created this piece?” Karina skips over friendly introductions and immediately demands what she is looking for, opening up her phone and displaying the picture of the painting in front of the mans face. 
“Ah”, he pushes his glasses from the tip of his nose, clearing his throat, “yes we do have a document from her. Unfortunately, by law, I cannot disclose any personal information. Is there anything specific about her you wish to know?” 
“Where can I find her?” Karina asks sternly. It is clear to those in the room that she had not come to play around, and expects to leave with the utmost beneficial information. If there was one word to describe the leader at this very moment, it would be determined. 
“Well, I don’t have much on that”, the boss flips through the documents and licks a thin line across his lips, “but, I do know that she is supposedly an art teacher. I don’t believe she is a professor, but rather does it for a company somewhere nearby. It might be her own company, I’m not sure I would have to look more into it.” 
Karina leans closer to the man in attempt to see the papers that were held firmly in his hand, however her attempt failed instantly as he closed the folder back up. 
“Could you possibly find the name of the company she teaches for? It would be a great help for me.” Karina stared into the mans eyes, bending down just a bit as a way to persuade him even further. He was visually discomforted as he restrained his neck from even taking the slightest glance at the girls bust. The boss opened the folder back up, sweat shining overhead his hairline as he flipped through the documents once again. 
“Um... I guess this must be it”, the man spun the papers he held towards Karina and pointed to a specific line printed under your portfolio. 
“Yl/n Studio’s”, he reads aloud, “it’s her own class I believe.” 
Karina gives the boss a sincere smile as she writes the name of your studio down into her phone. 
“You were such a help, thank you Mr. Choi”, she bows in respect before abruptly turning on her heals and out the door before he could respond. 
The leader wasted no time in racing out of the building and hopping into the front seat of her driver’s car, giving him the name of the studio she had recently discovered and requesting he take her there as soon as he could. The driver nodded and began to type the address, all the while Karina looked up the name of your studio on her phone. Much to her dismay, Karina noticed that there were only pictures of the exterior and interior on the internet, and unfortunately no pictures of you. You were too perfect for Safari anyway, Karina thought. 
“We’ve arrived miss.” Karina’s gaze suddenly shot from her phone screen to the outside of the window, forthwith she recognized the design of the building to be the exact one she had seen on the internet. 
“Perfect thank you”, Karina opened the door and began inside, taking in her surroundings to the beautiful, aesthetic arrangement constructed around her. The building was small yet elegant, and as she walked through the glass doors, Karina couldn’t help but allow her feelings to once again get ahead of her. 
She thought about it once more, she was finally going to see you again. After experiencing such a feeling as yesterday whilst she was around you, it was inevitable that she needed to see you once again, and finally it has come. 
Karina made her way into the lobby, taking note of the multiple doors adjacent to each other. 
“Is there something I can help you with?” A voice was heard beside Karina, and she turned her head to be met with the woman who operated the front desk. 
“Ah”, Karina waltzed over to her, a smile never departing the girls mannerisms, “I as wondering if Y/n Yl/n is working at the moment.”
The lady gave Karins a bright smile, “yes of course. You can find her just down that hall, the first door on the right.” 
And so Karina began, following the kind lady’s directions, leading her to the very door ahead of her. A sign that read your name could be seen in her line of vision, and before Karina raised her knuckles to knock on the door, she hesitated. 
She was so nervous when you had first approached her, how could she not be nervous now? You were the ideal definition of perfection, your demeanor sweet and your idiosyncrasy addicting. Karina was sure that the moment she was to see you again, she would instantly fall head over heels, unable to pick herself back up. 
But whatever. It was time Karina faced herself and introduce herself properly to you, so, with the shakiness of her knuckles, Karina raised her hand and knocked thrice on the wooden door, earning a response only a second later. 
“Come in.”
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Part 2 yahhh!!! Thank you all for the endless support, i hope you all enjoy this mini series :)
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