What the rest of the world sees:

What Jason Grace sees:

Who will win Jason's love ?

Sometimes babygirl is blond bimbo in glases who ate staplers and was raised by wolves.✨✨💅

Sometimes I think the Percy Jackson fandom is chill but then I remember

we used to have shipping wars with Jason x Brick vs Jason x Stapler

What the fuck

Which is better

Me right after I see something I find a bit odd:

"My confusion is endless nyehehe"

hello <3 i love ur writing btw !!

would you be willing to write a jason grace x fem!apollo!reader fluff one shot where they’re having a lazy day together and it’s just very cute and they banter back and forth occasionally and stuff like that? maybe it’s winter and the reader can harness the sun’s energy or something similar so she’s constantly warm and it in turns warms jason?? thought that would be super cute haha

thanks <3

jason grace x daughter of apollo!reader summary: you and jason enjoy a winter day full of teasing and banter wc: 262

"Okay, so hold on. You're telling me that you, Jason Grace, former praetor of Camp Jupiter, tried to eat a stapler when you were a baby?" You asked, trying not to burst out laughing.

Jason sighs. "Yes, how many times do we have to go over this?"

"I just- I can't even imagine that. I wish there was a picture or something."

"Well-"

"Oh my gods, Jason please tell me you're not about to tell me there's a picture of baby you eating a stapler, because I will actually go insane."

"Yes, there's a picture," he says, immediately regretting the blackmail material he just gave you.

"Oh, Jason, you sweet summer child, you do not know the power you've just given me. But you're lucky I love you, because if I didn't I would find that picture and go around camp and show it to everyone," you tease.

"Yeah, but I know you. You wouldn't do that," he says sweetly, pulling your warm body closer to his colder form.

"You're right, I love you too much for that."

"I love you more," he says, kissing your forehead, then the tip of your nose, and finally, he presses a long kiss to your lips.

"Y'know, I'm starting to think you only say that so you can keep me around during the winter to use me for warmth. I might have to tell my dad about this and have him hit you with the car he somehow drives through the sky."

Jason just rolls his eyes in response before kissing you again and again.

Pretty Boy

: ̗̀➛ Jason Grace x clearsighted mortal!gn!reader

: ̗̀➛ In which you witness something horrible and wake up wishing it was just a dream, only to be met with the prettiest man you’ve ever laid your eyes on

: ̗̀➛ oh my gods??? hi??? yall absolutely ATE UP my percy fic??? i was actually SO nervous abt posting my writing, but the positive feedback made me so happy :,) also yes, this is set during HoH. do i care? no! piper is a gay icon and im sorry but i clocked in IMMEDIATELY that she wasn’t straight. my gaydar is just THAT good. also, i’m not entirely the biggest fan of this piece, but i believe in posting what i make. i use it as progress markers :)

: ̗̀➛ WARNINGS: probably out of character, near allusions to a panic attack (mr stapler eater thwarts it quickly 😌), jason being FINE.

‘oh my god, oh my god, oh my god!’ you think to yourself as you stare, unable to tear your eyes away from the Neptune statue that you frequently found yourself at this summer.

you watch as two weird furry things giggle and laugh at two boys. you don’t understand any of what’s happening right now, but you do know that whatever those weird ass creatures are, they stole the boys belongings.

you’ve never been the type to just let people get harassed, even if you don’t know them, or if their harassers are… four foot tall furry things… “hey! those don’t belong to you!” you growl at the creatures, stepping out of the shadows of the alleyway and approaching the broken fountain.

you let out a startled squeak as the shorter boy lights his hands on fire out of shock and defence when you approach. the sound that left your body as well as the EVERYTHING happening around you somehow distracted you from the telltale feeling of lightning preparing to strike on you.

in a flash, golden cords extend from Neptunes fingers, wrapping mostly around the blond boy. one of them misses the brunet, only to latch itself onto you.

just as you’re caught up in the tight golden cords, your body pressed tightly against the blond boy’s, a bolt of lightning strikes Neptunes trident, and suddenly the world went black.

vaguely, you can hear someone telling you to wake up, almost as if they were in a panic. thinking it was your mother trying to tell you that you’re going to be late for school, despite it being july, you curl yourself tighter into the nearest surface.

‘wait a damn minute…’ you think to yourself briefly. ‘this… this isn’t my pillow or my blanket…’

your eyes fly open, and are met with the clearest blue you’ve ever seen. theyre so blue that you weren’t sure if you were looking at the sky for a split second. and then it all comes rushing back.

“oh my god!” you cry, your voice shaking with confusion. it was real? why did it have to be real? why couldn’t this whole thing have just been a dream??

the pretty blond boy was clearly panicking a bit himself. “hey! hey! calm down, it’s okay!” he says over your panicky breathing. “my name is Jason. everything is oka— breathe, dude oh my gods calm down?!”

well that snapped you out of it.

“excuse me?!” you snap, your eyes narrowing with distaste. “don’t you tell me to calm down when i’m hanging upside down with some himbo lookin’ ass who’s acting like this is a regular ole thursday!”

the boy, Jason, bites his lip to stifle a laugh. if he wasn’t so damn attractive, you would’ve been incredibly offended. “sorry.” he giggles.

as you study his face, your own softens slightly. Jason didn’t portray it with his heart on his sleeve, but looking deeper into those mesmerizing clear blue eyes, you could see the horrors. something tells you that he doesn’t get to let loose very often.

“y/n.” you say, much softer than before. “my name is y/n.”

Jason smiles, and the small scar on his lip twitches. briefly, you wonder what the story behind it is. “it’s nice to meet you, y/n. i’m Jason. i wish it could’ve been under better circumstances.” he offers kindly.

you scoff and roll your eyes with a hint of fondness. “yea yea. you know how to get us out of this, Pretty Boy?” you ask with a small, slightly nervous smile.

Jason chokes, clearly not expecting the compliment. “er- yea. uh, just… don’t freak out when i pull out my sword.” he says sheepishly.

your eyes widen. sword?! before you even realize it, there’s a satisfying shrng! of metal in the air. Jason’s golden blade cuts through the cords that hold the two of you up and you tumble to the ground.

you wince and cradle your head. “ow…” you murmur, a frown on your lips.

despite you CLEARLY being in pain, Jason laughs at you softly. he offers you his hand to help you up, and with a shy smile, you take it. “these streets probably aren’t that safe right now… let me walk you back to… er… wherever you came from?” he offers kindly.

you can’t help but chuckle now yourself. “oh, sure, let’s walk to america.” you say with a snort as you begin to walk down the pretty streets of italy with an equally pretty boy. “won’t your friend need help, though?”

Jason shrugs your worry off. “nah, Leo’s fine. he’s as resourceful as they come.” he tells you with a smirk.

you nod and continue walking. “so i assume that there’s a reason i could see those weird things?” you ask softly, almost afraid of the answer.

Jason nods stiffly. he opens his mouth to answer you, but you don’t hear it. you’re too busy staring at him. at those clear, electric blue eyes that are shielded by a pair of glasses and hide so much pain. his soft looking pink lips and the scar along them. his windswept blond hair, as though he’d been flying through the sky without any protection. the way he talks and walks, as if he’s been trained his whole life to be a diplomat.

jesus christ, this boy is pretty as they come.

when you finally tear your eyes away from him, you frown. you’re somehow at the home your family has rented for the summer. already?

“thank you, for walking me back.” you say to him shyly as you look back into his gorgeous eyes.

Jason’s cheeks light pink, just barely, but enough that you can see. “of course. it’s no problem.” he responds as he rubs the back of his head nervously. “take care of yourself, okay, y/n?”

you nod and say your farewells, watching him as he turns and runs back the way you walked, intent on finding his friend. you wonder if you’ll ever see him again, if the fates will ever allow you to cross paths with such a beautiful person ever again.

your eyes fall as you watch him leave, but snap back up quickly. damn! he has a nice ass, too…

Okay... Here we go! SecretAdmirer!Jason x reader. All month, he leaves a little gift each day at the reader's desk while she's at lunch. (Nothing weird, but like her favorite candy bar or something.) Occasionally, he leaves little poems with them. Nobody knows (rather nobody will tell because they've been shipping you two idiots for a while) who it is. On Valentine's Day, he finally 'gets caught', leaving a single rose.

you’re Bruce’s long-suffering secretary

Jason comes by one day to drop off Tim (and to totally annoy Bruce) and he stops in front of your desk and you blink up at him, pen cap resting between your lips and a cup of coffee clutched in the other hand and my boy is smitten

he starts coming by regularly and Bruce totally knows why but he doesn’t want to push Jason away so he just accepts the various pranks that Jason sets up as an excuse for his presence

he starts chatting with you as he comes by “for lunch” he claims, but you see the whoopee cushion he’s holding behind his back

one day you made an off handed comment that your stapler broke and boom, a new one appeared by lunchtime

small things start appearing, your favorite candy to your favorite snack. After a long night at the office, you find a cup of coffee and a breakfast sandwich from your favorite cafe sitting on your desk

you have your suspicions, but you also don’t want to make an accusation and be wrong because that would be mortifying

he thinks he’s so slick asking you what your plans are for Valentine’s Day and Jason totally doesn’t leave with a cheesy grin on his face

I feel like he would debate on flowers but then he settles on a little poetry book, something simple but deeply touching

you find it on your desk when you get in on Valentine’s morning and you run your fingers over the soft cover before flipping it over to the first page where a small inscription is written

I’m shit with words and a fucking coward so I hope this helps explain - Jason

you march over to Bruce’s office, barge in without asking, inform him that you’re taking the day off “so your idiot son can take me to the aquarium” and he merely salutes you before firing off a text to the family group chat that he wins the bet

Jason does take you to the aquarium and he kisses you under the sea turtle exhibit. The poetry book sits on one of the bookshelves in his bedroom with a small plush turtle next to it.

every Valentine’s Day, he pulls the book down and sits on the couch with you pressed flush against him as he quietly reads aloud poems to you (you never last past ten poems before you’re practically jumping his bones) (there’s just something about your scarred lover with his rough, smoke-tinged voice and sharp eyes reading aloud his devotion to you)

Liked this? Send me an ask over the next few days for a Valentine’s Day drabble or headcanon!

omg covey i’m thinking about “i'm a sister, i had a brother...his name was jason” and i’m imagining meeting jason when he comes to chb for the first time. like being the only one to know who he is(other than thalia obv but she’s not there and chiron who has to keep the secret duh)

imagine annabeth showing up with ur expecting to be percy(ur baby bro) and instead it’s a boy you thought was gone?? your best friends little brother??? and just being like “no way that is the stapler eater. i thought he was dead”

also having to know he is alive and here but thalia thinks he’s dead and gone??? my heart can’t take this i’m making myself sad at this point i have to go now

✮⋆˙ always someones little brother; the lost hero ft. daughter of poseidon! reader blurb

content: the beginning of the lost hero ft daughter of poseidon! reader. warning: none! author's note: once again, wrote this instantly. something about this plot line got me foaming at the mouth frfr. ALSO i wanted to fit “no way that is the stapler eater. i thought he was dead” into this so bad, but i couldn't find the right place for it lmao. just know it's here in spirit because that is the BEST fucking line i've ever heard, good lord- ALSO i had negative idea how to tag this one bc like...thalia's not in it so i can't say 'x her' and 'x jason' doesn't really make sense??? so i just went with 'lost hero' ft the reader bc that was the best i could come up with lmao

when that blond boy and his friends washed up to camp, you couldn't help but be the slightest bit disappointed it wasn't percy. it was natural; the big sister in you begging to ensure his safety. during moments like this, you thought of thalia and wondered if she considered herself an older sister after all these years of believing her brother to be dead. and you vaguely wondered if you would ever get to that point too, percy being gone for so long that you lose your title of big sister. a title you wore with so much pride that being stripped of it would surely kill you.

but then you broke through the crowd of campers, telling them to scram and leave the new arrivals alone. you pulled annabeth to her feet, pressing a kiss to her scalp, knowing she was sharing your feeling of disappointment. then you shooed her away too, telling her to get chiron before - finally - turning to the new trio. a beautiful cherokee girl with eyes that were hard to look away from, a scrawny latino boy who's hands were a constant blur of adhd induced motion, and finally was that blonde boy who's eyes left you reeling. a striking blue that you had only ever seen in one other person...thalia. and a scar on his upper lip...roughly the right size for a staple to be the cause. there was no way...the gods could be so cruel sometimes.

"a-are you jason? jason james grace?" you gasped out, eyes locked on the boy as your lip wobbled in sympathy of thalia. she wasn't even here to greet the one boy who never left her mind. jason jolted at you knowing his name, eyes wide and slowly nodding his head.

"do- do i know you? do you know me?" the poor amnesic boy questioned and you half-shook your head and half-nodded.

"no, not really. but...i know your sister, thalia-" and before you could get more out, jason was jolting forwards, a vesical reaction to his sisters name. you leapt forwards, catching him from plummeting to the ground and instead slowly crumbling down there with him, your arms firmly wrapped around him in hopes of providing some comfort. you had the fleeting thought that you hoped someone would be there to catch your baby brother like this if he were to ever need it.

"i...i remember thalia. my big sister," jason whispered against your shoulder, fighting off tears as the memories rushed his brain. and you smiled softly and squeezed the boy a little tighter.

"she'll be so so happy to see you, jason. her baby brother that she thought was dead. you know, she never forgot you, she loved to talk about you to me," you muttered, gently rocking him like you would a baby, despite his grown age. jason pulled back slightly, looking into your eyes in seek of lies.

"she loves talking about how your favorite snack just so happens to be staplers-"

"one time! it was one time!" jason hissed out, isntantly, and you laughed.

"yes, but that scar really doesn't help your arguement," you mused and jason just shook his head, but he seemed more at ease then when he first arrived.

you couldn't help but think that you and thalia had traded places. a daughter of the big three lost their baby brother so the other could have hers back. and you thought, faintly, that you and thalia would always live like this. wretched mirrors of the very things you wanted, but the only way for it to come true was to damage the loving face looking back at you.

i will forever be confused over how people ship brason. Jason made out with a stapler at TWO years old, it was his first love. The stapler left a permanent mark on jason's lip, if that isn't romantic idk what is. Stapler x Jason supremacy >>>>>

A Weird Birthday Tradition Between A Bunch Of Friends From Work

read it on AO3 at https://ift.tt/gQuXvMS by Betrayed_Dreams It's odd how some things become traditions. This one started out as a joke. (In the name of international cooperation and bonhomie between different intelligence organizations across the globe. It makes you wonder, did the people at HR even know what they did for a living?) In fact, Agent Twilight had to google it – 'What's the most terrible gift you can give someone.' As you would expect, there was a list with 15 items and out of them. Loid picked one at random. And so, on Agent Double-Oh-Seven James Bond's birthday, he received office supplies – a stapler, tape and paper clips. As a birthday gift. And what happened next, how the rest of the spies and assassins of the world of intelligence and counter-intelligence got involved, well, you had to be there to understand it. But look on the bright side - No one died. ...Except for the terrorist Jack Bauer, Natasha Romanoff and The Thorn Princess tortured. ...And the fight which almost happened between Jason Bourne and Ethan Hunt. ...And the fight which almost happened between Natasha Romanoff and Jason Bourne. The key word being almost. (One-shot) (Complete) Words: 1341, Chapters: 1/1, Language: English Series: Part 1 of Our Friends Are Weird Fandoms: SPY x FAMILY (Anime), SPY x FAMILY (Manga), James Bond (Craig Movies), Jason Bourne Series - Robert Ludlum, Bourne (Movies), Marvel Cinematic Universe, The Avengers (Marvel Movies), Black Widow (Movie 2021), 24 (TV), The Man From U.N.C.L.E. (2015) Rating: Mature Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings Categories: F/M Characters: Loid Forger | Twilight, Yor Briar Forger | Thorn Princess, James Bond, Jason Bourne, Natasha Romanov (Marvel), Jack Bauer, Clint Barton, Napoleon Solo, Illya Kuryakin Relationships: Loid Forger | Twilight/Yor Briar Forger | Thorn Princess Additional Tags: Romance, Comedy, Humor, Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Canon-Typical Violence, Friendship, Team as Family, Family Feels, POV Loid Forger | Twilight, Married Loid Forger | Twilight/Yor Briar Forger | Thorn Princess, POV Multiple, Birthday, Birthday Fluff, Loid Forger | Twilight Loves Yor Briar Forger | Thorn Princess, Yor Briar Forger | Thorn Princess Loves Her Family, POV Yor Briar Forger | Thorn Princess, Male Friendship, Female Friendship, Male-Female Friendship, Post-Identity Reveal Loid Forger | Twilight/Yor Briar Forger | Thorn Princess, Birthday Presents read it on AO3 at https://ift.tt/gQuXvMS

The only love triangle that matters is Jason Grace x brick x stapler

plot twist: all three end up together 

I don’t know if this fandom is ok or if I love this fandom because of this or not but we ship jason with a brick. We also ship him with a stapler. We ship octavian with a catapult(which is valid but still). We probably have more ships like this but right now these are the only ones I remember. And I don’t even know why or whether I want to

Frank, coming in after a fight on deck: Man, I’m starving.

Jason, following him: Me too, I need a snack, like immediately.

Percy, Leo and Nico: *immediately holding out staplers*