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fill-me-with-your-memes-daddy · 3 years

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Watching the Rise of the Titans movie and I'll be documenting all of my thoughts/reactions here. [Spoiler Warning]

So instead of reblogging every new update, I'm just going to have this post up on my phone as I watch and type my reactions in a bullet list format.

Nari's human disguise is so cute. As someone who does have a cottagecore aesthetic, I want to cosplay her so bad

Are Skrael and/or Belroc non-binary coded? Regardless, I'm also obsessed and I want to fuck Skrael and be Belroc.

STEVE CARING ABOUT JIM BEING HURT YESSSS!!! My god his redemption has probably been one of the greatest there is because he doesn't just suddenly go from being a bully to a completely good person. You can see the gradual shift in learning better throughout the shows which is awesome.

IN NEW YOOOOOOORRRRRRRK!!!!!! CONCRETE JUNGLE WHERE DREAMS ARE MADE OFFFFFFFFFFFFF!!!!!

The mugshot montage reminded me of season 1 of trollhunters when toby and Jim were arrested at the museum.

STRICKLER PUT A RING ON IT??? HE'S THE ONLY DILF IVE EVER ACTUALLY AGREED WAS HOT WYM I CAN'T HAVE HIM??? well I'm still really happy about his arc over the series probably one of my favorite character growths.

Eli my guy got his growth spurt!!! As an 18 year old who is still 5'0", I'm happy but envious for him

So I went into this movie without watching any trailers or promo, but I doubt anything could have prepared me for the existence of mpreg. In fact, I wasn't going to document my reactions until I saw that.

NAMURA!!!!!!!!! MY BELOVED!!!!!! I CAN STILL THIRST FOR YOU WITHOUT GUILT

The coach teacher just called the kids zoomers so I have to dock one point from my final rating just because of that. Unforgivable

Those husky animation models suck lmao

Oh fuck the titans got power ranger zords!!

God why did they include the mpreg??? This movie would have been perfect without it.... After that plot point being revisited only one time I'm already beyond done with it

Like it's bringing me back to the v*ltron days where they're was a suspiciously high amount of klance omegaverse and mpreg fics and art created and it physically hurts because Steve and Keith's voice actor is the same person meaning this is especially cursed to me since I was unfortunately in the v*ltron fandom and remember all of that

But like on another note, how old are these characters again??? I haven't checked any wikis because of spoilers but is Steve an adult??? I know aja might be technically a lot older than 18 because alien but is whatever age she is equivalent to an adult as far as emotionally and physically in Akaridion development??? IS THIS A TEEN (M)PREGNANCY IN A KIDS SHOW????

Like bruh I saw a singular post on here before going into the movie that was like "rott spoilers without context" and there was a pregnant belly but I was absolutely not expecting the actual context of it. I'll find the post after I finish and edit this post to tag the creator right here: @makoden

This entire post is just gonna be me ranting about mpreg huh

Anyway I love the whole roundtable allusion to the legends of king arthur (not the toa version but the one he's based off)

THERE'S 3 TO 5 BABIES????? I need to take a break bruh this is just too much

Alright I've taken a 30 minute break got some food and did some things i love (decompressed by tactile stimming with some owl plushies and watched some videos on my favorite owl, Garu. He lives in Japan with his owner and is a domesticated eagle owl who basically just acts like a sky cat. If anyone else needs some eye bleach, here is their YouTube channel)

Blinky and ARRRGHHH!!! saying their "if one of us doesn't make it" talk my god one of them is going to die I can see it and I will be utterly crushed. Jim can't lose another father figure and Toby can't lose his wingman again I will riot if this happens

On a similar but unrelated to the movie note, can we just talk about how toa started with Jim having 0 dads and (if strickler and blinky live to the end) will end with 2 dads? Like I just really feel happy for him that he has two dads who actually figured out how to put the past behind them to not have any infighting between them so that both of them are healthy father figures. Jim has already been through literal hell and back losing his actual humanity in the process so if he loses one of them, I'm going to be really pissed because at this point, this is just Jim torture porn. Y'all know how as SpongeBob SquarePants went on, the show just became Squidward torture porn? It's starting to feel that way for toa and I really hope they cut the shit by the ending

Jlaire is such a good ship but like I feel like it's too perfect they never disagree with each other

YESSSSSSS Someone finally doesn't treat toby like a fat waste of space who messes stuff up!!! I think out of all the characters that would have been most deserving of a rewrite, it's Toby. Sometimes I just feel he's only comic relief and any heartfelt moments he's had in the series was also born of stupidity (ie his flour baby project being unharmed was seen by him as divine intervention from his parents but was actually just Eli and Steve behind the scenes).

Ohhhhh yesssssss Archie's father!!! I was hoping I'd see him again because we got so little of him last

Ooooooooooh Asian trollmarket!!!!!

Oh never mind slavery trollmarket

Bruh titanic camelot

I feel like we're not seeing enough of the villains because I completely forgot about the power ranger zord things

NAMORA NOOOOOOOOOOOOOO MY LAST CRUSHHHH

STRICKLER NO NOT YOU TOO PLEASE

WHAT THE FUCK!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

THE ONLY TWO CHARACTERS I SIMP FOR ON THIS SHOW DIED WITHIN FIVE MINUTES OF EACH OTHER

THAT WHOLE ASS RANT I WROTE IS COMING TRUE FUCK THIS MOVIE THIS SERIES IS JUST JIM TORTURE PORN

WAIT JIM'S SPERM DONOR INFO?

Oh thank God I don't want to know anything about that person

For the record, I call that man Jim's sperm donor because he has no business being called a father to him. All he did was donate some swimmers to the creation of him and give him abandonment issues

Oh another blind troll elder???? This fucker is just if vendel was a bad guy

Bruh I was grieving

PACIFIC RIM WITH GUN ROBOT VEX AND THE BELROCZORD? I've never seen that movie but I know the reference

Bruh Blinky doesn't read horoscopes? Does he realize conspiracy theories are just the manly version of horoscopes?

NO DON'T KILL VEX STOP KO-ING FOUND FAMILY MEMBERS

Oh thank God he's okay

NO NOT ARCHIE AND CHARLEMAGNE OH MY GOD

oh never mind they're just gonna coup de tat I believe in them :))

But I want to see him again

But I'm glad to see vex

Yay they're in arcadia!

But yeah I wondered why the trolls and Merlin didn't keep the whole "daylight doesn't hurt trolls" feature from the eternal night but now Guillermo del Toro I see you were playing the long con in that just to kill my girl Namora :(((

Oooooh I love the animation of the Narizord over Chihuahua!! It looks very good and realistic (if only they could have put some of that into those huskies from before smh)

Bruh the character designs of the arcane order are so good I want to be them

Nari making sure the Skraelzord doesn't crush the bus

DAMN DOUBLE HOMICIDE

Bruh I'm just glad we finally have an answer on why arcadia had everything going on as opposed to literally anywhere else!! I always found that as a weird coincidence for plot convince.

BRUH WERE BACK TO THE MPREG IM SO JEALOUS I FORGOT ABOUT THAT EVEN THOUGH IT WAS BECAUSE I WAS GRIEVING THE LOSS OF MY LOVELIES.

Oh that's real convenient that the ninth configuration meant all of them. Way to not decide which character gets more attention. Though it probably was a smart way to not have any infighting in the fandom between each character's stan group.

Bruh I just realized where is Barbera did they just ditch her on the Camelot ship???

And where are the other trolls that migrated at the end of trollhunters s3? They said something about new jersey but obviously Jim and the other main characters got on Camelot instead.... This feels like a plot hole

And we never learned the process of how changelings are made and bonded to humans and stuff. We just know it's super painful but I'm curious ffs!!!!

THE DONT THINK BECOME HERO SPEECH ALL SAID TOGETHER!!!

BRUH THEY REALLY HAD TO SHOW HIM GIVING BIRTH??????? WAS THAT AN ABSOLUTE MUST??????

Plus the main audience for this series is little children (the rating for the movie is literally TV-Y7) so even though my adult ass is not in the target audience, I STILL DONT UNDERSTAND WHY WOULD MPREG AND ANAL BIRTH WOULD BE AN IMPORTANT THING TO 7 YEAR OLDS???? THIS IS A LITERAL FETISH HIDDEN IN KIDS CONTENT ITS ELSAGATE ALL OVER AGAIN Y'ALL 😭😭😭😭😭

Though it's probably hypocritical of me to think fetishes don't belong in kids tv when I've openly admitted to thirsting for strickler and namora

HUZZAH

NEW AMULET WAZ GOOD????

STAB THAT BITCH JIM

WAIT NO I SAID STAB NOT GET STABBED

Alright good job just missed the directions at first but you fixed it

SEVEN KIDS?????????

T O B Y ????????????

W A I T NO

N O

IS HE ACTUALLY

OH MY GOD THERE'S HOPE

NO THERE ISN'T

F U C K THIS SHIT THEY REALLY JUST HAD HIM TO BE BULLIED THEN KILLED

Y'ALL IM ACTUALLY CRYING THIS NEVER HAPPENS

I NEVER ACTUALLY GET SO EMOTIONAL OVER MEDIA THAT I CRY IT ONLY HAPPENED ONCE AT THE END OF VOLTRON BUT AHHHHHHHH

W A I T

HE'S GONNA BE BROUGHT BACK?????

HOLD UP THEY'RE JUST GONNA BRING ALL THOSE DEAD PEOPLE BACK??????

WAIT IS HE

BLINKY CALLED HIM A SON

HOLD ON IS THIS GOING TO BE A CLIFFHANGER???????????

BRUH THEY REALLY JUST CAN'T END THE SERIES WITHOUT CLIFFHANGERS like there's always an open ending

TROLLHUNTER TOBY????? You know what forget the whole rants I had on how toby was written they just redeemed it all

And that's all! I'd rate it a 6.5/10 because it's definitely the weakest of all the sequels but still had amazing animation and some good plot points. It's just really hard to look over the bad stuff enough to rate it any higher.

#tales of arcadia #rise of the titans #trollhunters #rott #rise of the titans spoilers #rott spoilers #toa #3 below #athena's own original post!#jim lake jr #claire nuñez #toby domzalski

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crossovereddie · 3 years

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Actually, here is an alternative thing for you to occupy your time with, and a question I have been meaning to ask you for a while. I have finished 911 finally! So I'm ready for the new season. And I wonder, realistically, what do you think the roadmap would be for a buddie endgame?

I absolutely see how their story has been framed and filmed in a lot of parallels to how a romantic storyline would be set out. But there has been no outright mention of either of them being bi - although the conversation about Maddy setting Buck up with whassisface was very casual and could very easily have been an example of canonically bi Buck - and they are both at the end of season 4 in 'relationships' with women.

So, in your estimation, what's the timeline? What's the transition? How do they go about this and how long does it take? I wanna know your thoughts 👀

okay yes i have lots of thoughts on this and it's actually one of my fave questions i get asked. I've always watched a lot of tv shows so I'm just estimating on what I've seen before and what I would personally do. IMO this love story is a slow burn. We only have four seasons so far and only three of those seasons have Eddie in them. This unsurprisingly got long so ill put it under the cut.

So I'll go by seasons bc to me its important to look at everything that has happened so far by seasons and by love interests and not as a whole. Its the best way i can form a timeline that I think would make the most sense and why

S1: So we don't get any hints at Buck being anything other than straight and I think this is because he was supposed to be. They hadn't planned for Eddie yet and they definitely hadn't planned for the chemistry Oliver and Ryan were gonna have. S1 Buck was this reckless kid who didn't take anything serious. He was definitely super immature. Then he meets Abby and he starts to get serious about his job and his love life. I'm not gonna say "Abby changed him" because she didnt. He saw the person he was and the person he was becoming and decided on that change himself.

S2: Eddie!!!! So we get introduced to this army medic turned firefighter in the least heterosexual way. Then Buck is angry because Eddie is hot and really good at his job. they work together and Eddie compliments Buck and now they're smiley bffs. Seriously wtf was all that? Anyway this is all sus bc from what ive seen before in other shows when a main love interest leaves and a new main character replaces them, that means something. JLH replaced Connie Britton as far as big name actress but i really believe Eddie replaced Abby as far as importance in Buck's life. Do i think they brought him in with the intentions of turning him into a LI? No but they sure fueled the narrative from the get go. I think they saw fans reactions and started testing the waters.

Moving on to LIs in this season. We find out Eddie has a kid and the mother is not in the picture (eddie made sure buck knew that right away). Then later on we find out he's technically still married. shannon comes back and we get Eddie finally getting to confront this head on. He tries to get his family back together for the sake of his son. Its big for Eddie's character bc all he does and all he's ever done is for his son. Then Shannon asks for a divorce then she dies bringing this arc to an abrupt end and leaving eddie heartbroken.

meanwhile Buck is still waiting for Abby. Then he finally accepts that shes not coming back and decides to move on. He goes right back to being "Buck 1.0" with Taylor and feels bad about himself because that really isnt him anymore. He wants a real relationship. So then Ali calls and asks him on an actual date and he agrees. This is his first try at a relationship after a heartbreak. in tv these don't usually work out but are used to develop the main character's growth. We don't really see much of her but she breaks up with him so.

S3: This is Eddie finally dealing with his feelings/guilt season. This is also the season I think we really see how important Buck is to the Diaz boys. S2 had cute buckley-diaz family moments but those could still be interpreted as a best friend and his best friend's kid. This season though... after the tsunamic episode was when i really started to fully believe buddie was going canon. This season is solidifying their bond not only as Buck and Eddie but as Buck Eddie and Christpher. As I'm writing this I realized neither of them really has a love interest in this season do they? Ana is introduced but then is clearly presented as definitely NOT the right choice for eddie and especially for Chris. Then they counter that with Buck helping Eddie build a skateboard for Chris that he can use as opposed to Ana's ablest remarks about how he can't do it so just move on to something else. Then we get Buck's reaction in Eddie Begins. Buck has seen his team his friends his family get hurt on the job before but he has never reacted the way he did when it was Eddie in danger. Again solidifying just how much these two mean to each other. Don't even get me started on this season being when Eddie changes his will offscreen. Anyway we get Abby back and Buck finally gets the closure from that relationship that he needs to move forward into a serious relationship.

Now S4: jfc s4....IMO this is the only logical season to get the ball rolling on Buddie and they sure did that with 4x14 despite everything else. So i never thought they would be the first serious relationship for each other after the heart break theyve both experienced. It wouldn't be fair to their character developments. Buck tries dating Veronica and that clearly doesnt work but we know hes now open to dating again. We get Buck Begins where we see why Buck is the dare devil he is. The only way he got his parents attention as a kid was to put himself in danger. They bring back taylor and how to they ultimately get together after she friendzones him? She thinks hes in danger and suddenly wants him. As much as i hate it this is really gonna be a relationship where Buck finally stands up for himself and sees his own worth and realizes he deserves more. He deserves someone who sees him and loves him for who he is. He deserves to be chosen, something Abby Ali his parents dont do and what i think taylor wont end up doing. I feel like shes gonna choose her career over him. Maybe not in a "I'm breaking up with you" way but maybe she takes a new job and want to do LD (hes tried that twice and it didnt work for him. hes not gonna want that) or she could ask him to go with her but he wont. His family is in LA. His job is in LA. Eddie and Chris are in LA and he won't leave them. Then we have Eddie finally deciding to move on and try dating again so they bring back ana. To me it's not gonna work out so I'm not bothered at all lmao. It's interesting that they'd choose her though. Someone we already know Eddie doesn't trust with his son. There's also more buckley-diaz family scenes of them being coparents. The hildy episode, Chris running to Buck when hes mad at eddie, Buck being the one to tell Chris Eddie got hurt, then Buck staying with Chris and taking on the guardian role without him even knowing just how much that role really does belong to him. He didn't do it out of obligation. He didn't do it because he was asked to. He did it because he thought it would be best for Chris. Finally to 4x14. This is by far the biggest "Oh shit this is it. This is the beginning of buddie". We find out Eddie changed his will a year ago and has just been sitting on this info. I think Eddie knew back then what it meant but he wasn't in the right mindset to accept what it means so he kept it to himself. I think he finally started allowing himself to go there during treasure hunt. The man was jealous yall. Carla coming back and her comment about doing whats best for him and not chris is his oh shit moment. I think he wouldve broken up with Ana a few days after that if he had the time lol. He gets caught up in the mother/son sl then this poor mf gets shot by a sniper. The way that whole scene was filmed btw was not in a bff way. That was a lover watching his beloved almost die in front of him. Buck again puts himself down and Eddie decides this is the moment. He needs Buck to see how important he is. He wants buck to know how loved he is. So he sits there talking himself up to it and finally lets Buck know just how big of a part he is in Eddie's family. Buck's previous scene is him saying he wants someone who wants him back then here is Eddie saying he needs him...Chris needs him. wtf.

So with S5: I think Eddie knows and Buck has a feeling but he's not sure so what i would do is spend s5 with Eddie basically showing Buck his feelings but not exactly getting in the way of Buck's new relationship because Buck has to be the one to make that choice. Id also have chris feeling the different shift with buck having a gf like he did with Eddie. This newfound info wasnt just dropped on us for a "Aww so sweet" moment. This will business is gonna be a part of a bigger storyline. I'm hoping its with Eddie's family during maybe 5b.

So what I think would be the best timeline for canon buddie is 5a eddie already having either broken up with ana or is gonna break up with her, Buck choosing himself and ending things with Taylor by midseason finale, them bringing in Eddie's family in 5b and maybe then being when Eddie confesses his feelings for Buck. Then 6a we could get them walking on egg shells around each other not really knowing what to do bc this is all so new for both of them. This could bring just the right amount of comedy and angst especially them awkward and flustered around each other at work. A big blowup can happen between them for added angst (maybe an arguement before one of them or both of them is put in danger) then a midseason finale kiss. Then trying to find the balance between their personal relationship and their work relationship during 6b.

I don't know how long Fox shows last but procedurals can last a long time. I'm not sure thats gonna be the case for 911 especially with all the main cast staying that long so i think this would give us at least a whole season (S7) of canon buddie.

As far as then being presented as straight, there's been more seeds planted about buck being bi. A few i can remember off the top of my head: all of 2x1 lmao, maddie's comment about bucks boy crush on eddie, buck hinting at thinking eddie is cute when he thinks maddie is talking about him, the christmas elf, the comments on the instagram livestream, idk if youve watched it or not but TK's comment to Buck in the crossover episode, and like you mentioned Maddie's casual comment about setting him up with Josh. All we really know about Eddie's love life is he married Shannon when they were young and is trying with Ana so it could turn into a whole storyline for him.

I'm so sorry this is so long and took forever but i I hope i actually answered your question and didnt just get lost in rambles lmao.

#oh god that took me way too long lol #eddie diaz #evan buckley #buddie #911onfox #is this meta?#wtf even is that #buddie meta #??#idk

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vanityloves · 3 years

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anyways im gonna listen to/read the fuckin...rise of the ogre shit bc ive been putting it off 🪓🥴 im gonna put stuff under the cut bc im gonna be TALKING n dont wanna make a new post everytime

piss

ok he performed for 2 pounds 50. which is basically $3 today i- well it was absolutely a power play on his father behalf that also had the promise of money so.

also lol he said Rejection fueled my ambitions which, yknow,, i already knew but it still hurts and i will continue to talk ab it xoxo

AH HELP. "...if ebay had been invented at the time he would've sold me online there and then,"

"man hands on misery to man, yknow"

THEN PROCEEDS TO CONNECT IT TO MUSIC/HIS CAREER. this man said :) the one thing i truly have a passion for. the one thing i fucking like.

oh yeah. bullied by students AND teachers.

oh god hes 42ish during this interview? ok.

the fuckin school bully saying he wouldve acted differently if he knew what hed become

getting called "faceache", then proceeds to call 2d that. jfc he really does just repeat what everyone says. really "treating others how i was treated/how they treat me"

maybe thats why? hes kinder to fans? bc :] you support me and like me so, ok ill return that energy

MURDOC GETTING HIS ASS BEAT N PARADING HOME LIKE WELL I WON BC 'I PISSED YOU OFF' SJDJD

a real rowdy boy. absolute nasty boy. fraud and arson... shooting ppls windows with his air pistols

black sabbath being a huge inspiration? fucking absolutely.

became a satanist n shit at age 16? "it fitted me like a glove" "heavy metal and devil worshipping became my favorite past times" ajsj funny that ppl in trying times often seek religion or following of some sort

heavy metal being his favorite, n loving the clash, while hannibals was more punk based

hannibal breaking murdocs nose for the 2nd and 3rd time for playing his music on hannibals turntable

he doesnt sound that bitter? ab hannibal? he doesnt sound incredibly fond but he talks ab how he got him into a lot of music. so, i imagine they we're a bit closer than i thought?

international baccalaureate in antisocial? anthropology?

MURDOC IS ACTUALLY SMART HE WAS JUST. NOT INTERESTED IN THE SUBJECTS? I GUESS? (also,,, he literally Built cyborg noodle and i think he had a PhD too lol. but its always nice to hear hes actually...yknow, interested or good at other things)

alright but murdoc having a fascination w/ other cultures - or at least some interests, that lead him to actually study the damn subject and "pass with flying colors"

'fuck college though. im gonna be a rockstar'

he sold his soul at 18ish? whenever the fuck he got kicked out but college was mentioned so my brain goes to 18ish idk

he lived with his father still and paid rent via low paying jobs one including 'part time dressing as santa'

help he was ab to take a Personal Job for quick cash and uhh well, "still made me call him sir though" he really said 20 dollars is 20 dollars, huh "that story was totally true"

alright, 1997,,,

2d stuff

loves zombie stuff? thats really cute, and is freaked out by the way they move. god he rambles

both he and murdoc are horses in the chinese zodiac

[[jfc ok if the official shit compares them a lot i understand why ppl ship them but Dont. its a narrative foil and that doesnt always mean Romance jfc.]]

SUMTHINK.

truly... a lil stinker. super cute bouncing baby and a "bit thick" which is stull so endearing to me. hes just a happy man!

excitable 10 year old and would dance around his room

jfc the fact he has normal/caring parents. i kinda forget how opposite hes supposed to be from murdoc but i think thats another thing jsjsysg (murdoc said why isnt my tragic story making me famous why does he get to be the Star. no wonder he acts like a loon)

i still dont get how gettin bonked by a tree branch made him go bald and also turn his hair blue

big tiddy nurse mommy,,,

went to the same school as The Cure and got decent grades despite hittin the noggin quite hard. WANTED TO BE A STORM CHASER... OMG??

oh thats really cute, hed bond with his dad by building keyboards toegther 🥺💕

messed around with paints and graffiti? artistic king

MURDOC AGAIN: QHDJ 'VILLANOUS' GANG HELP

oh yeah d day...new instruments, new band, new singer - and 'had to be the best or no dice' and absolutely CONFIDENT that his songs were bangers ajsjd

but on that same note, had absolute faith (or desperate) in 2d which i love

ransacked the fucking music shop jdjdj and 2d said he was Just Standing There behind the counter the whole shift hdhdh

"thats when your eye came out, yeah" "yeah!-" HELP WHY DOES HE SOUND SO HAPPY AB IT ?? yes he said ut hurt but he sounds...ok

jfc murdoc ragdolling this poor mf around. dunking him and slapping him around. actually? so incredibly terrible and abusive and i hate him for that 🔫 im sorry 2d stans. we dont condone that behavior here ong.

how and why the FUCK did 2d's parents allow that fucker near their child after that i??? help. wtf. his moms a nurse why didnt she just have murdoc sit in plain view of other people. god damn.

2d flying out the window n hitting the curb "whoops"

"just two black holes...[ah] it looked great...a blue hair, blacked eyed GOD- the girls would go wild-" "pretty boy looks" ???? HELP. HE DOESNT GO LIGHT ON THE COMPLIMENTS, HUH

RUSS TIME

oh yeah, he straight up kiddnapped this man help. idk how he managed that, russ is a Big Man??

AND MURDOCS MUSIC WAS SO FUCKING SEXY GOOD that russel said hm alright ill stay, :] out ifbhis owm free will im screaming.

"oh this is one of them febreeze commercials" "uh . yeah sure. *murdoc turning on his Sick Tunes*" but that either means? it was just his guitar playing the convinced russ? unless he and 2d recorded sumn?

"2d was the looks, murdoc the brains, then russel truly was the heart"

'while 2d and murdoc liked music, this man was a MUSICIAN' god fucking bless this book holy shit ny man russ getting some respect. he said back hurts from carrying this band.

murdoc basically heard this guy had big trauma that gave him So Many Skills n said "thats what i want" ok idk thats actually really? inch rest ting to me. seems that murdocs fine handing out compliments but i guess that where his charisma really helps out yeah?

"he was going to be in my band whether he liked it or not" ...murdoc-

HELP. 2D IS LIKE BRO GO ON IM LISTENING 🥺 despite hearing the story 50-60 times and murdoc said fuck off you lil shit.

ok irrelevant but i love his voice! its super comforting n nice to listen to 🥺

HELP MURDOCS SO BITTER. "NOTHING THAT HAPPENS TO US IS NORMAL" WELL YEAH. THIS IS TRAUMA CENTRAL.

idk how/why he sucked up all his friends souls though ... how are they all possessing the same person. they said "its my turn on The Russ"

DELL IS HIS ACTUAL, LITERAL SOULMATE...KING...😭

went to a private school,,, and was already possessed? and the thing where he gets bigger and smaller is a reoccurring thing?

was in a coma for 4 years?

hiphop machine...time and history...the ultimate set i guess.

his knowledge was infinite and hes a "Renaissance man" hes so fucking smart our king. jack of all trades but a master of drums. he said i know im good and what of it

PAULA.

HELP. HE RMBRS THE STALL: CUBICAL NUMBER 3 🥴 IF I DO RECALL 🤤

yes russel our king. fuck up his nose 5 more times. probably stunted his growth too. he shrunk after russ gave him a wallop im sure

why dies paula sound like tracer overwatch

also only dated 2d for 2 months before joining the band?

HELP SHE REALLY WAS THE FIRST MURDOC FUCKER: "but when i saw murdoc with his thick greasy hair, green teeth and yellow skin i thought 'oh this is the ine for me!'" "OH HES SUCH A DANDY-" HELP ME IM HQJDHD

sick in the head...like i want to hurt people help girl. shes fucking Crazy. but she rly said damn i didnt hear back from him again 😭 and my purse is gone JSHHD

MURDOC: SHE WAS DEPRESSINGLY UGLY *still fucked her*

NOODLE TIME

"small japanese person!"

2d: we werent gorillaz until noodle arrived!

im dying the reason he chose gorillaz. 'swinging through the jungle baring my ass'

noodle really said "im just happy to be here" and she balanced everyone out 😭 "she gave off pure love and the fact that she could laugh at murdoc REALLY helped too" RUSS... IS BABY

JFC MURDOCS SO FUCKING CONFIDENT IN THIS BAND IM LIVING FOR THAT. HE SAID YOU WANT US SO BAD IT MAKES YOU LOOK STUPID. THE CHARISMA

2d rambling ab some girl he met and "ssSs" "whats the s stand for hawhaw" "i dont know!".

THE RECORD LABEL GUY.

one song is all it took i ❤ good for them

just murdoc talking ab the party that they threw for thier deal and saying "you dont know how much of a dick i felt like [when carrying one of those huge checks]" like oh thats whatll make you a dick? alright.

A FOOD FIGHT THAT WENT SO HARD THAT IT KNOCKED 2DS TONSILS OUT? WHAT THE FUCK

ahshdj damon and murdoc not getting along bc of Rival Band One Uppery + damon calling murdocs cuban heels crap since ge wore steel ones with gold spurs.

MURDOC FEELIN EMBARRASSED BC HES 'QUITE PROUD OF HIS SHOES'

but the band and damon getting over music and their ambitions and became a "paternal figure"

HELP MURDOC SAID AWIOGA @ RACHEL WHICH MADE HER THROW HER DRINK IN HIS FACE AND SPLIT FROM 2D. kinda sad actually, she said i still like 2d but murdoc kinda ruined it by trying to get it in with me, it put a strain in our relationship :/ oh god murdocs That Dude

nov 31 1998: started recording :]

40 tracks that got cut down to 15 holy shit

KONG STUDIOS 🤲

hooking up cameras in every room ejdjsu

webby artist of the year in 2006? holy shit

noodle learning ab kong studios omfg

JFC. YES I KNEW KONG WAS BUILT ON/IN A CEMETERY BUT I DIDNT KNOW PPL FOR THE FUCKING PLAGUE WHERE THROWN THERE HDJD

built in 1739?

the ghost of the first owners ghost still roams around in the kitchen in the early hours and moans 'aaa glass of water'

theres some rotting bullshit near the studios and in the summer its fucking TERRIBLE

the former owners were a biker gang, and they all died in a fire

murdoc said this place has bad vibes. i want it.

grim weather

the building feels impossible to escape from huHgg

#rip lol i feel annoying but my blog my rights ig #brainworm ivy #gorillaz rambles

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jewlwpet · 4 years

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Girl Alchemist Egg--Tale of the Rose track 1, translation

As far as I know, nobody else seems to be translating J. A. Seazer’s latest Utena album, which came out in August, to English (please correct me if I’m wrong)... so the job falls to me.

This is track 1, 知恵の竈(アルデル)実験祈祷室, or “Aludel of Wisdom Experimental Prayer Room”. An aludel is a kind of pot used in alchemy; it goes in a furnace (this is significant).

EDIT: I accidentally left out the romaji for one verse and missed a reference in the title; the version with all corrections (at least for now) is here.

EDIT 2: I changed my translation of the title to “Wisdom’s Aludel Oratory-Laboratory”. See here for my explanation as to why that’s a better translation.

金より不純物を除きそれを純粋な形と成しそれをうまくなし遂げる者はかくて、賢者の石を作りえようそれは偉大な力の「石」であり「石」と呼ばれていて石ではない

To remove impurities from gold To shape that into a pure form The one who successfully accomplishes this, By this means, can create the philosopher’s stone It is a Stone of great virtue And is called a “Stone” and is not a stone.[i]

錬金術師たち

Renkinjutsushitachi

The alchemists

ああ、永遠の知恵の錬金術ああ、永遠の知恵の実験室ああ、永遠の知恵の竃劇場

Aa, towa no chie no renkinjutsu Aa, towa no chie no jikkenshitsu Aa, towa no chie no kamado gekijou, gekijou

Ahh, eternal wisdom’s [ii] alchemy Ahh, eternal wisdom’s laboratory Ahh, eternal wisdom’s furnace theater, theater

夢ではなく現れるドラゴン世界創造の始めに波の上を漂っていた神の如し

Yume de wa naku arawareru doragon Sekai souzou no hajime ni Nami no ue wo tadayotteita kami no gotoshi

It was not a mere dream; it materialized, the dragon![iii] Like unto God, who in the beginning created, Hovering over the surface of the waters.[iv]

蒸留、昇華、煆焼、煮煎反射、溶解、下降、凝結

Jouryuu, shouka, kashou, shasen Kansha, youkai, kakou, gyouketsu

Distillation, sublimation, calcination, decoction, Reflection, dissolution, descent, coagulation[v].

すべて水のなか黒そのものよりさらに黒そしてルビーの燦然たるいろの耀きその間に発生するああ、祝福される緑万物芽吹かす緑

Subete mizu no naka Kuro sono mono yori Sarani kuro Soshite RUBII no sanzentaru iro no kagayaki Sono aida ni hasseisuru Aa, shukufukusareru midori Banbutsu mebukasu midori

Everything within water[vi], A blackness still more black Than blackness itself[vii], And, too, The ruby’s brilliantly-colored radiance,[viii] All the while: generation, Ahh, happy green, Which dost produce all things[ix]!

神の霊気の緑カ��ラの緑渦巻く宇宙秘術師よ緑のライオンを哲学者の火賢者の火鞴よ錬金炉アタノールの火を熾せ

Kami no reiki no midori KABALA no midori Uzumaku uchuu Hijutsushi yo midori no RAION wo Tetsugakusha no hi Kenja no hi Fuigo yo Renkin ro ATANOORU no hi wo okose Behold!

The green of God's mysterious presence, The green of the Kabbala[x], The spiraling cosmos, The Magus, the Green Lion[xi]. The fire of the philosophers, The fire of the sages![xii] The bellows! Light the fire of the alchemical furnace, the athanor.

見よ哲学の竈||実験室宇宙の竈||実験室散らかり放題の貧乏吹き屋の実験室

Miyo Tetsugaku no kama no jikkenshitsu Uchuu no kama no jikkenshitsu Chirakari houdai no Binbou fukiya no jikkenshitsu

The philosophical furnace--the laboratory! The cosmic furnace--the laboratory![xiii] Scattered unrestrainedly, A poor smelter’s laboratory

われら価値ある人間たらんがために価値を目指す錬金術師

Warera Kachiaru ningentaran ga tame ni Kachi o mezasu Renkinjutsushi, renkinjutsushi

For us To have value as humans To aim for value Alchemy, alchemy

それは一月十七日月曜日正午頃、私の家で、立会人はぺるネル一人だった。人類救済一三八二年の年である。私は水銀に投入を行い、それを約半ポンドの純銀、鉱山のものよりも良質の純銀に変化させた。その後、やはりぺるネル一人の立会いのもとに私の家で、同僚の水銀に赤い石を用いて同じことを行い、四月二五日夕方五時、本当にほぼ同量の純金に変成した。普通の金より確実に良質でより軟らかく、よりしなやかであった。これは真実である。私と同じく理解していたぺるネルの助けをて、私はこれを三回実現したのである。二コラ・ヴァロワ

Sore wa ichigatsu juunananichi getsuyoubi shougogoro, watashi no ie de, tachiainin wa PERUNERU hitoridatta. Jinrui kyuusai sen sanbyaku hachijuu ni nen no toshidearu. Watashi wa suigin ni tounyuu wo okonai, sore wo yaku han-pondo no jungin, kouzan no mono yori mo ryoushitsu no jungin ni henkasaseta. Sonogo, yahari PERUNERU hitori no tachiai no moto ni watashi no ie de, douryou no suigin ni akai ishi o mochiite onajikoto o okonai, shigatsu nigonichi yuugata goji, hontouni hobo douryou ni junkin ni henseishita. Futsuu no kin yori kakujitsu ni ryoushitsu de yori yawarakaku, yori shinayaka deatta. Kore wa shinjitsudeari. Watsahi to onaji rikaishite PERUNERU no tasukeote, watashi wa kore o sankai jitsugenshita nodearu.

The first time that I made projection was upon a Monday, the 17th of January, about noon, in my house, Pernelle only being present, in the year of the restoring of mankind, 1382. This was upon Mercury, whereof I turned half a pound, or thereabouts, into pure Silver, better than that of the Mine. And afterwards, following always my Book, from word to word, I made projection of the Red Stone upon the like quantity of Mercury, in the presence likewise of Pernelle only, in the same house, the five and twentieth day of April following, the same year, about five o'clock in the evening; which I transmuted truly into almost as much pure Gold, better assuredly than common Gold, more soft and more pliable. I may speak it with truth, have made it three times, with the help of Pernelle, who understood it as well as I. --Nicolas le Valois[xiv]

[i] The last two lines of this verse are from Les Cinq Livres or La Clef des Secrets, by Nicolas le Valois, a French alchemist rumored to be the deceased Nicolas Flamel, supposedly using an alias after attaining immortality through the Philosopher’s Stone. I don’t know of any English translation of this text, but the original French is online at https://alchimie.000webhostapp.com/cinq_livres_valois.html. It’s likely that the first lines are also from alchemical texts; I just haven’t been able to identify them

[ii] Eternal wisdom—a phrase from Heinrich Khunrath, used in the title of his book The Amphitheater of Eternal Wisdom. There is an English translation by Peter J. Forshaw, but I have not yet been able to find it; I have, however, contacted the translator inquiring how to obtain it.

[iii] Carl Jung, Psychology and Alchemy: “The dragon is probably the oldest pictoral symbol in alchemy of which we have documentary evidence. It appears as the Ouroboros, the tail-eater, in the Codex Marcianus, which dates from the tenth or eleventh century, together with the legend 'the One, the All'. Time and again the alchemists reiterate that the opus proceeds from the one and leads back to the one, that it is a sort of circle like a dragon biting its own tail. For this reason the opus was often called circulare (circular) or else rota (the wheel). Mercurius stands at the beginning and end of the work: he is the prima materia, the caput corvi, the nigredo; as dragon he devours himself and as dragon he dies, to rise again in the lapis. He is the play of colours in the cauda pavonis and the division into the four elements. He is the hermaphrodite that was in the beginning, that splits into the classical brother-sister duality and is reunited in the coniunctio, to appear once again at the end in the radiant form of the lumen novum, the stone. He is metallic yet liquid, matter yet spirit, cold yet fiery, poison and yet healing draught - a symbol uniting all the opposites.”

[iv] This is a clear reference to Genesis 1:1-2. “Like unto God” recalls the story of the Garden of Eden; Adam and Eve were forbidden to eat the fruit of the Knowledge of Good and Evil because it would make them like God. Alchemists were also seeking knowledge that would make them like God, although the authors quoted in this song emphasized that one could not attain it without God’s blessing.

[v] These are all names for different techniques in the chemical process. Most are still used in chemistry today (only the terms “reflection” and “descent” are no longer used, as far as I know).

[vi] Valois explains that “water” means something different in alchemy. Basically, this water is a truly universal solvent, capable of absorbing anything into itself. He uses an interesting metaphor for this: “It's this Maid Beïa, which has not yet been corrupted or lost its liberty, to marry infirm and ill-shaven bodies, as captives are, who can never leave their filthy prisons without the help of men. Thus preserving liberty with its integrity, we see in a philosophical manner this luminous star making infinite circulation turns, until it came in some reign.”

[vii] Putrefaction, the nigredo, the black stage in the alchemical process. The idea is that there must be sacrifice to facilitate new growth.

[viii] The philosopher’s stone is sometimes called the “celestial ruby.”

[ix] These two lines are from The Rosary of the Philosophers; however, I used the translation of the quote found in the translation of the Exposition, rather than the original text, although that can be found in English too: http://sociedadquimicamexico.org/rosarium.pdf. Here, it’s given as, “O blessed greenness, which engenders all things.”

[x] Many alchemists, both Jewish and non-Jewish, drew on the Kabballah (Jewish mystical texts), although how well they really understood it is questionable. I myself am not at all well-versed in this, but it seems that in the Kabballah, the color green represents healing and harmony.

[xi] The Green Lion typically represents the same thing as the dragon. E.g. The Glory of the World mentions “the Green Lion that imbibes so much of its own spirit.”

[xii] The author of The Glory of the World wrote of “indelible, living, or Divine fire, of that kind which God has placed in the Sun; and wherein God Himself burns as with Divine love for the consolation of all mankind... This is the fire of the Sages which they describe in such obscure terms, as to have been the indirect cause of beguiling many innocent persons to their ruin; so even that they have perished in poverty because they knew hot this fire of the Philosophers. It is the most precious fire that God has created in the earth, and has a thousand virtues -- nay, it is so precious that men have averred that the Divine Power itself works effectually in it. It has the purifying virtue of Purgatory, and everything is rendered better by it. It is not wonderful, therefore, that a fire should be able to fix and clarify Mercury, and to cleanse it from all grossness and impurity. The Sages call it the living fire, because God has endowed it with His own Divine, and vitalising power.”

[xiii] Different names for the athanor, a kind of furnace. The alchemists viewed their work as the creation of a microcosmos, a “petite universe” if you will. “Cosmic furnace” doesn’t seem to have been common in English, but one does find the French version, fourneau cosmique.

[xiv] This passage is adapted from Exposition of the Hieroglyphical Figures. By attributing it to Valois, Seazer continues in the tradition of claiming him as part of the legend of Flamel. We can infer from this passage and its attribution that the two voices we hear singing this song are meant to represent Nicholas and Per(e)nelle, Flamel’s wife, purported to have been an alchemist in her own right.

#j. a. seazer #revolutionary girl utena #shoujo kakumei utena #sku #girl alchemist tale of the rose #WHEW #THAT WAS A LOT OF WORK

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hella-free-space · 4 years

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Life update nobody asked for :)

Hoooo weeee... we're like 3 weeks into 2020 and i know the world is lookin r o u g h rn... but i just wanted to take some time to shout into this wonderful dark blue void we call tumblr for a sec

I put all of it under a readmore, but tl;dr is that i got time off of work this week and next week to write some more fishy articles for yall! Also i filed for divorce last nov, which should be finalized by may, and i am so SO excited for this year :)

2019 was a rly wild year... i think its the most personal growth ive experienced and i dont regret any part of it (even though some parts were genuinely terrifying or rly hard to go through).

I lived somewhat independently for most of it (i rly loved having a place to myself :3 even tho taking care of it and myself and all the kiddos was sometimes hard, it was wonderful to have so much freedom and independence).

I made lots of new friends :D

I filed for divorce! (this ones a big'un and by far the best! Itll be final in may hopefully). I had to say goodbye to the cats and the dog (i couldnt keep them and my ex was the one who brought them home originally. He moved to a place with a backyard and more people to help take care of them. It was definitely in their best interest but I do still miss them♡).

I moved back in with my parents, but got to keep all of my other babies :3 the pumpkin patch sling im raising went thru their first molt (fingers crossed they continue to eat like a tank and grow up big n strong). My hamster is an old man now but the vet said hes lookin great for such an old man :) it makes my heart happy that he'll be around a while longer ♡

I got a raise at work! Ive had this job for over a year now and i like my coworkers. Bossman gives us days off when we ask and cooks everyone home made lunch when he comes in once a week :p

I decided to take time off of school to sort out my life and academic habits. Most of it has to do with anxiety (hence the counseling) and developing healthier coping mechanisms. Also figuring out what I really want to do... because i dont have to consider how my career will affect anyone but me now... so im switching to environmental science :) it doesnt pay as well as computer science, but im more passionate about it and even when i went thru a rly bad depressive episode last year and failed half my classes... i aced the heck out of my ES ones and enjoyed the material :)

I signed back up for counseling! Went to my first appointment last week and my therapist is super dope.

I wrote some freelance pieces. (Which i have been very very slow to finish recently... i hope to have some more turned in soon tho! I’m sending in my tiger barb care article today and I asked for some more days off at work to be able to work on freelance more! Ive only had 1 day off per week for the past few weeks @.@ but I had 3 days off this past week so no excuses!!)

I started new hobbies! I got a sewing machine for xmas (shout out to my mom, who is the dopest woman i know) and am excited to try some more challening projects :p i made some simple stuff, but i really wanna make plushies!

I finally found a dnd group and its SO MUCH FUN :3 ive only been to 2 sessions now but the dm is great and also patient about all my newbie questions :3 reddit has also been v helpful ^-^ I’ve also been having a ton of fun dndiying stuff for my character (like spell cards/stat cards) and making miniatures with sculpey (first time working with polymer clay, so thats been cool too) :3

---

Going into 2020 im really excited to travel this year. I’m going to denver next month!!! and possibly a cruise with friends at the end of the summer?? we’ll see :p I’m also excited to get more into my new hobbies (DND, sewing, miniature-making, etc) and getting back into to older hobbies (terrariums, scrapbooking, snail mail, etc). I’m trying to go back to school in the fall as well so fingers crossed my change-of-major gets approved >w<

all in all though, i’m hype for 2020 and i hope everyone has a good year too :)

#roni replies #not fish #life update nobody asked for

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withallthingslove · 5 years

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the handmaid’s tale s3ep6 thoughts

under the cut because spoilers

honestly...not a lot of thoughts because this episode was hella boring

and confirmed my fears for the show

the last episode was the only “good” episode of this season don’t @ me

idk what the show is trying to do with commander lawrence. i saw a behind the scenes thing where the producers talked about how the dynamic between lawrence and june is so awesome and interesting and i dont see it. bradley whitford is a great actor but the show is out of ideas so they are trying to keep as many characters as possible ambiguous and its dumb

the vibe in d.c. was so creepy

wow i missed rita

fred is in his ~element~ in d.c. that smug bastard

it’s interesting that the d.c. wife went by her first name (that im blanking on) and not mrs. __________. It seems like even though they are higher up they are much more chill as a couple (probs because the husband is GAYY)

the stapled mouths... chills

if aunt lydia is disgusted you know its bad

mmmm nick how i’ve missed you

june and nick’s secret smiles and touches... finally some good fucking content

fred is so INSECURE about nick lolol. He was #shook to see him and then his whole confident commander vibe went away because he knows nick is holly’s dad therefore hypothetically outranking him. When he called nick “son” I almost burst out laughing

okay im sry but the swiss were not trustworthy at all. As soon as june hinted about nick they immediately perked up and were the ones who asked if it was nick who she was talking about. they were there to collect info about gilead and that is all. they weren’t there to actually help the situation. I thought that was plain as day the way the scene was presented. The music, their body language and how they menacingly leaned forward....

nick was looking to get some lolol and june was like no baby please focus on the issue at hand

nick’s reaction when june told him about the deal pretty much confirms what i thought. he has been behind the scenes in the government and knows what goes on. he knows they aren’t actually there to help holly, or june, or him. he point blank says they don’t give a fuck about them. i think max did a great job conveying that he wanted to please june and be there for his daughter, even though he knew the risk and that ultimately nothing would be done

lol dat commander is gay for fred

the wife talking about working at a law practice just made me think of john mulaney going “you have your law practice and I have these fucking markers” in one of his specials

im not sure how the conversation with nick and the swiss went down... he obviously showed up to the meeting. I also think it’s pretty clear the swiss knew who he was so they probably already knew he was a “war criminal.” but I don’t know if he gave them info and then they were like “thanks for all of that but we can’t trust you because youre a war criminal” or if they just didnt let him talk at all. who knows

showing him walking in all black through the soldiers was hot af and it was a poor attempt by the show to try and paint him as a villain.

also im sorry but what did june expect?? i always assumed it was implied nick had at least fought a little bit like in season 2 when he literally ASKED to be sent to the front.

This revelation really wasn’t as bad as I thought it was going to be. Nick still loves june, he still loves holly, he showed up to the meeting despite his past and his reservations, he still has on a mask when dealing with gilead stuff. It doesn’t excuse his complicity when gilead started, but i think it’s pretty clear he isn’t a gilead believer

I also wonder if serena exaggerated how involved he was because if he was that important in the war wouldn’t he have been made a commander? Like if he was ~that~ impressive of a soldier he would have been promoted and not been a low-ranking driver for so many years. Or that’s just an inconsistency with writing (lets face it it’s probably that)

im telling you the show is out of ideas and so instead of moving the plot forward to anything they are just having characters act ambiguous or backslide for the sake of trying to keep viewers on their toes when really we’re just annoyed with the inconsistency

the scene with aunt lydia... i mean give ann dowd all the awards as always. the scene was sweet and weird at the same time. and I think it’s obvious june and janine are aunt lydia’s “favorite” handmaids. I don’t think this was really out of character for aunt lydia, but I don’t think it’s growth either. It’s always been pretty clear that aunt lydia is sadistic but its because she is truly trying to redeem/save the girls. she “loves” them in a fucked up way, but she truly believes she is helping.

unlike serena who loves nothing and is cold and empty. ive always said that fred is a villain but hes just dumb and not really worth anyone’s time, aunt lydia is delusional but at least believes in what she is doing, and serena is the worst of all because she is smart enough to know that what she is doing is wrong and she does it anyway.

i LOVED june’s speech to serena like finally. everything she said to her was 100% accurate

can we please have some waterford-less episodes im sick of seeing them

the music that played while june cried by the lincoln memorial was BEAUtiful also

like damn

where will this show go next?? who knows but i dont really care because it’s boring

#the handmaid's tale #the handmaid's tale spoilers #june osborne #nick blaine #nick x june #elisabeth moss #max minghella #serena joy waterford #yvonne strahovski #ann dowd #aunt lydia #joseph fiennes #fred waterford #tht #tht spoilers #handmaid's tale #mine

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reckoningss · 5 years

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Mercy Springs - One

Summary: Mercy Booker holds these truths to be self-evident: animals are significantly more relatable than people, and working as a veterinary tech in a sleepy little town is as close to the “good life” as she’s going to get. When a strange man shows up at her clinic after hours with an injured dog, she has a decision to make - go on living the quiet life she’s come to know or open the door to the exhilarating unknown.

Pairing: Pete Castiglione/Frank Castle x OC (Mercy Booker)

Warnings: Animal death, allusions to blood

Wordcount: 2k

A/N: Starting a new series as if I’m in any way consistent or disciplined. We’ll see how this goes.

Mrs. Haskell was in tears. More accurately, she was wracked with pitiful, blubbering sobs that shook her shoulders and dripped tears and God knows what down the front of her worn, magenta hoodie. Mercy rubbed her shuddering back and try, unsuccessfully, for a comforting smile.

Wednesdays were the worst.

It was no coincidence either; Dr. Liebovitz scheduled the majority of his euthanizations on Wednesdays and Mercy - as his primary veterinary tech - attended all of them. By his reasoning, Wednesday wasn’t early enough in the week to compound the misery of a Monday and wasn’t late enough to spoil the weekend. She had to admit there might have been something to his logic.

Mercy removed her hand from Mrs. Haskell’s back and gently grasped her forearm instead. “Hey.” She infused her voice with a measure of authority - warm consternation. Mrs. Haskell lifted her face out of her hands and gazed at her with watery eyes. All of the crying had painted her face with a mosaic of creamy red and pink splotches. Mercy smiled again.

“It’s time.”

Her lip quivered and more fat tears escaped the corners of her eyes. “Oh, Mercy, I don’t think I can watch. I can’t go in there.”

Mercy squeezed the older woman’s wrist and willed her to meet her eye. “You have to. The last thing Boomer sees shouldn’t be me.”

Jeanie Haskell choked out another sob and screwed her face up in agony. “Bu-”

“But nothing.” Mercy cut her off decidedly, leveraging her burgeoning talent for providing comfort and chastisement in the same breath, “You’re his entire world. He deserves to have you there.”

Her sobs quieted to gasping whimpers as Mercy walked over behind the reception desk and plucked two tissues from the strategically placed Kleenex box. Returning, she folded them gently into Mrs. Haskell’s hands and rubbed her back again.

“It’s going to be alright. We’ll be right there with you.”

In the operating room, Mercy stood quietly to the side as Mrs. Haskell kneeled in front of Boomer and wrapped her arms around her neck. She’d managed to stop crying, but the old dog could feel the sadness rolling off of her and tucked his wide head into the side of her neck.

Poor thing, Mercy thought as she watched the final embrace unfold. Jeanie Haskell had been bringing Boomer to Charity Springs Animal Clinic since he was a puppy - well before Mercy graduated from DeBrie with her associate's degree and stumbled into a job with Dr. Leibowitz. He’d been older but still energetic when Mercy first met him - fun, but more reserved with age. They’d had a few good years to bond over checkups and countless treats. But now at 11 he was suffering from the onset of bone cancer and walked with a pitiable limp. He just looked tired.

Mrs. Haskell pulled away from her old Beauceron and ran a hand down the side of his long, weathered face, then, kissing his nose one last time, she stood and backed into Dr. Leibowitz’ waiting arms. The older man gazed at Mercy over the top of the wire-rim glasses sitting low on his nose and offered a wistful smile.

Mercy took a deep breath and nodded. “Ok.”

From her pocket she produced a treat - chicken jerky flavored, Boomer’s favorite - and offered it to the dog. After a cursory sniff, he took it meekly from her palm. Mercy rubbed the crown of his head with one hand and with the other, injected several milliliters of acepromazine into the dog’s rear. He twitched a little but didn’t respond.

“Good boy,” Mercy cooed, scratching Boomer behind the ears while she waited for the sedative to take effect. “You’re doing so great.” Boomer blinked sluggishly, laying his head on the linoleum floor. “That’s it, Buddy.” Crouching, Mercy slid her hands gently beneath the large dog’s frame and hefted him into her arms. He really was a big dog - 105 pounds the last time she’d weighed him, probably closer to 95 now. She huffed tightly through her nose. “I’ve gotcha.”

Mercy laid Boomer down on the stainless steel exam table and smoothed a hand down his side. His black fur was duller than it had been in previous years but no less beautiful.

“Oh,” came a breathy whisper from over Mercy’s shoulder. She stepped to the side so a sniffling Mrs. Haskell could step in and caress her beloved companion. “Oh, baby, I love you so much.”

Mercy shared a look with Dr. Elie Leibowitz from where he stood across the table. The doctor looked good for 67, but he had sad eyes. Mercy knew for a fact that he adored his job, but it saddened him too, especially during moments like this. Dr. Leibowitz nodded.

Mercy took another breath in preparation.

“Ok. Boomer is partially sedated now. The acepromazine is going to keep him from feeling any pain, ok?”

Dr. Leibowitz shuffled over to the corner and rolled over a metal stand. An IV bag swung lazily from one of its arms. Mercy carefully unsleeved a catheter needle. A pair of gloved fingers pushed back fur and located a vein in one of Boomer’s hind legs. She pushed the needle in. “We’re going to start an IV of pentobarbital - a seizure drug. At this dosage, it’s going to put Boomer to sleep. Then it’ll shut down his brain and heart functions.”

Dr. Leibowitz fit the end of the IV line into the catheter port and screwed it in. Mrs. Haskell hiccupped another quiet sob and buried her hands in Boomer’s fur. Big, anguished tears were rolling down her round cheeks again. Mercy watched as the liquid began to fill the drip chamber.

“It should only take a few minutes.”

“You were wonderful, Jeanie, you made Boomer’s last moments very special,” Dr. Leibowitz murmured reassuringly from the hallway.

That part was his specialty - the people part - and Mercy knew to leave him to it. She could practically see him - one arm wrapped around the mourning woman’s shoulders, head bent in to whisper comfort to her. He always knew what to say.

She would much rather do this. The aluminum gurney bumped over the tiles as she rolled Boomer’s body into cold storage in the back. The body was stiff now, brown eyes half-lidded. The local pet crematorium would be by to pick up the body in the morning. In a few days time, Mrs. Haskell would come back to pick up the urn of Boomer’s remains.

Mercy lugged the heavy storage door open and rolled the table inside. Boomer didn’t look like he was sleeping in the low light filtering in from the hallway but Mercy laid one gloved hand on the side of his lifeless face anyway. “You were such a good dog, Boom.”

Dr. Leibowitz was already disinfecting the table when Mercy made it back to the exam room. He offered her a quick glance overtop his glasses as he hummed. Mercy quietly went around the room, gathering discarded paper sleeves and alcohol wipes into a trash bag.

“You were very good with Mrs. Haskell today.”

Mercy paused in the doorway - the mouth of the trash bag half twisted into a knot - and peered at Dr. Leibowitz over her shoulder.

“I mean it.” The doctor bent low to snatch a pen up off the floor, bracing a hand on his knee and groaning. He was like a very, very old tree. “Your bedside manner is really improving.”

Mercy scoffed. “The animals think my bedside manner is great.”

Dr. Leibowitz chuckled warmly as he shuffled across the room toward her. He cupped her shoulders and looked down into her face intently. “I know animals come easy for you, but the toughest part of this job is the people and they’re important too.”

Mercy offered a begrudging nod of ascent before glancing down at his vintage timepiece. She raised a brow. ”You have a date to go to.”

The doctor unhanded her shoulder to squint down at the face of his watch. His eyes went wide. “You’re right!” He threw his hands up and shuffled away from her at a determined speed. “It’s Italian night!”

Mercy grinned and followed him to the lobby, tugging on the knotted garbage bag to secure it. Leibowitz leaned over the reception desk to grab his coat and hat from the hooks on the wall. She had to admit, he looked rather dapper as he shrugged the jacket on. His wife was a lucky woman. Leibowitz lowered the trilby onto his head and glanced back at her. “You ok to lock up alone?”

“I always am.”

After Mercy locked the door behind Dr. Leibowitz and lugged all the trash to the dumpster out back, she made her way around the clinic cleaning and shutting everything down. The hour and a half long process wasn’t half bad with some music to keep her company. Not to mention that she always saved the best closing duty for last.

Mercy stored the empty mop bucket in the supply closet and retreated to the boarding room in the very rear of the clinic. A chorus of yips and cries met her ears as soon as she opened the door, bringing a smile to her face.

“Hey guys!”

It was the middle of fall and as such, the clinic was a little light on boarders, but Mercy didn’t mind. This way, she could provide their few charges with as much love as possible.

A litter of kittens had been brought in by the local girl scout troupe. Small, fluffy, and vicious, they were all a wonderful terror to babysit. Then there was Bodhi - the rescue bulldog puppy in for observation and shots. Mercy’s peach scrubs were a dark, slobber-stained coral by the time she locked his crate again. Tinkerbell - the curmudgeonly old tabby - was still in a foul mood from her operation to extract a benign growth, but they’d managed to work out a decent enough working relationship and Mercy swore she felt a purr when she tugged gently on the cat’s ears. And last, but certainly not least, Stav the lionhead rabbit was little more than a big, hairy softy, desperate for attention. Mercy made sure to spend a few extra moments stroking his soft belly.

Mercy finished up administering medication, checking stitches and refilling water bowls and offered the animals one last quiet ‘goodnight’ before turning the light out and retracing her steps to the lobby. It had started to rain while she finished up and she noted the patter against the wide plate glass windows with some relief. It had been a long day; she was just now beginning to feel the fatigue pulling at her as she dragged a hoodie over her head. She couldn't wait to get home, warm up a meal, drink a beer and fall into a deep, dreamless sleep.

Something flashed across her periphery just as her head breached the neckline of the hoodie. Mercy peered into the grainy bank of CCTV screens on the monitor sitting behind the reception desk and saw nothing save for the greyscale glittering of fallen rain. Maybe it had just been a raccoon. They were known to skulk around the clinic, ripping off whatever scraps they could find in the dumpsters.

Shrugging it off, Mercy dug her keys out of the desk drawer and headed for the door. She flipped through the densely populated key ring as she walked, thumbing through until she selected the heavy key to lock the door behind herself when she left. Mercy pinched the thick locking mechanism between her forefinger and thumb, ready to rotate it counterclockwise and swing open the door.

A volley of violent knocks shook the door and echoed through the nearly empty clinic. Mercy shrieked, dropping the keys and looking up into the bloody, frantic face of a man only inches away from her on the other side of the glass.

Mercy stifled the urge to clutch her chest although she could feel her heart hammering mercilessly against her ribcage. Her hand fumbled in her pocket for her phone, numb fingers itching to dial 911, until her gaze left the man’s desperate face and made its way down to the massive, grey dog bleeding in his arms.

Part Two

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feralhogs · 4 years

Note

1 THROUGH 55 AND 1 THROUGH 30 GO GO GO

LETS FUCKIN GO

tumblr please actually make this a keep reading

55 interesting questions you should drop in someone’s inbox

1. If you didn’t have to sleep, what would you do with the extra time?

I ALREADY WATCH NETFLIX AND AGONIZE OVER MY STORY

2. What’s your favorite piece of clothing you’ve own/owned?

MY JACKETS. ANY CHEST OBSCURING, BROAD SHOULDERED, COZY JACKET

3. What hobbies would you get into if time and money wasn’t an issue?

DANCING, ID NEED TO GO TO CLASSES OR SOMETHING

4. What would your perfect room look like?

IM ACTUALLY PRETTY HAPPY WITH MY ROOM BUT IVE ALWAYS WANTED A LAVA LAMP, AND 1800 MORE PLANTS COULDNT HURT

5. Do you play sports?

6. What fiction place would you love to go to?

SINNOH REGION

7. What Job would you be terrible at?

DEBT COLLECTION. I WOULD BE GIVING SHIT TO PEOPLE FOR FREE. I COULDNT BEAR BEING ENCOURAGED TO FORCE PEOPLE WHO CANT PAY FOR SOMETHING TO PAY MORE

8. If you could turn any activity into an Olympic sport, what would it be?

SERVING. HOW MANY PLATES CAN YOU CARRY AT ONCE

9. What’s the most annoy habit other people have?

WALKING IN MY SPACE BUBBLE WHEN MY SENSES ARE OVERLOADED

10. What skill would you like to master?

A SECOND LANGUAGE

11. What would be the most amazing adventure to go on?

THE ONE FROM MY DREAM WHERE I KISSED A GIRL DYED MY HAIR BLUE AND WE ELOPED TO BRAZIL TO RAISE SHEEP

12. What’s your favorite drink ?

THAT CHRISTMAS SHIT. PEPPERMINT MOCHA AT STARBUCKS. A FRIEND GOT IT FOR ME ONCE. NOW I ORDER IT A BILLION TIMES.

13. What state or country would you never like to go back to?

I HAVE NOT TRAVELLED MUCH EVER

14. What songs do you have completely memorized?

I DONT REMEMBER LYRICS SO MUCH, BUT I COULD PROBABLY REMEMBER HOW MANY SONGS GO COMPLETELY

15. Are you usually early or late?

LATE. IM GETTING BETTER THOUGH

16. What takes up too much of your time?

GETTING OUT OF BED

17. What do you wish you knew more about?

SWORDS

18. What are some small things that make your day better?

COFFEE. SOMEONE SAYING SOMETHING NICE TO ME.

19. What TV channel doesn’t exist but really should?

QUEER EYE BUT BY TRANS PEOPLE FOR TRANS PEOPLE

20. Who has impressed you the most with what they’ve accomplished?

YOU. AND ME. ITS GROWTH

21. What age do you wish you can permanently be?

21, SO I HAVE TIME TO FIGURE OUT WHAT THE FUCKS GOING ON

22. What TV show or movie do you refuse to watch?

13 REASONS, THE BOOK WAS TRIGGERING SO I WONT RISK IT

23. What would be your ideal way to spend you weekend?

TAKING A WALK, HAVING COFFEE, WATERING PLANTS… IM HAPPY

24. What’s something in your life that’s considered a luxury?

I HAVE PERFUME...

25. Is there anything you’re too young/old for?

TO YOUNG TO NEVER DRINK. TOO OLD FOR POKEMON

26. What’s your favorite genre book or movie?

I DONT HAVE THE ATTENTION SPAN FOR EITHER BUT I SEEM TO LIKE URBAN FANTASY A LOT

27. How often do you people watch?

I THINK IM SO POLITE BUT HONESTLY, I QUIETLY SCRUTINIZE SO MANY PEOPLE ON THE TRAIN EVERY DAY AND GUESS AT THEIR PERSONAL HABITS AND SELF IMAGE.

28. What’s the best single day on the calendar?

MY BIRTHDAY, SAGITTARIUS SEASON RULES BABY

29. What are you interested in that most people haven’t heard of?

I DONT KNOW ABOUT ANYTHING PPL HAVENT HEARD OF BUT IM INTERESTED IN BLACK HOLES

30. Do you relax after a hard day?

FOOD. NETFLIX. DECOMPOSING ON TUMBLR

31. What’s the best book or series you’ve ever read?

I HAVENT READ A BOOK I REALLY LOVE IN AGES. HARRY POTTER AND ARTEMIS FOWL WERE MY FAVOURITES GROWING UP, BUT CORNELIA FUNKES BOOKS SLAPPED AND HIS DARK MATERIALS WAS GORGEOUS

32. Where’s the farthest you’ve ever been from home?

IDAHO?

33. What’s the most heart warming thing you’ve ever seen?

LUCIFER WAS LIKE YOU DESERVE SOMEONE WHO CARES ABOUT YOUR BORING MIDDLE NAME JANE AND KNOWS THAT EVERY MURDER BREAKS YOUR HEART AND YOU SIMPLY DESERVE BETTER SO NO MORE MOMENTS WHILE THEYRE HAVING A MOMENT AND CHLOE IS WATCHING THIS FUCKING IDIOT AND IVE WATCHED THIS BEFORE SO I KNOW SHES GONNA KISS HIM AND THEN THEY KISS

34. What’s the most annoying question that people ask you?

ANY SMALL TALK QUESTIONS

35. Would you give a 40 minute presentation with no preparation?

YES. ID MAKE THAT SHIT RIGHT UP. SKILLS

36. What’s something you think everyone should do at least once in their lives?

GIVE ME A HUG AND SOME CHOCOLATE

37. Would you rather go Hand Gliding or Whitewater rafting?

HANG GLIDING

38. Dream car?

SOMETHING I DONT HAVE TO WORRY WILL FALL INTO PIECES AT ANY MOMENT

39. What’s something so many people are obsessed with and you just don’t understand why?

STRAIGHT LOVE SONGS

40. What are you most looking forward to in 10 years from now?

HAVING A CAT

41. What’s something you’ve been meaning to try but haven’t gotten to it?

DECORATING THE DOLLHOUSE I RESCUED FROM THE BATHROOM

42. What’s the best thing that’s happened to you all week?

IM NOT VERY FAR THROUGH THE WEEK AND I HAVENT ENJOYED MOST OF IT BUT PEOPLE SAYING ADORABLE THINGS

43. How different was your life one year ago?

NOT A LOT DIFFERENT, IM JUST LONELY IN THE CITY NOW, MINUS A TOXIC RELATIONSHIP, ONE YEAR ON T

44. What/who would you rate 10/10?

MY CACTUS JAKEN. I DROPPED HIM SO MANY TIMES AN ENTIRE HALF OF HIS SPIKES ARE FLAT SCARS. AND LOOK AT HIM. THRIVING

45. What kind of art do you enjoy the most?

GENUINELY MADE ART

46. What do you hope never changes?

MY T PRESCRIPTION

47. What movie title best describes your life?

I LOOKED THROUGH NETFLIX AND I PICK TWILIGHT

48. What website do you visit most often?

TUMBLR

49. What’s something you’re looking forward to this year?

MY BIRTHDAY

50. What’s something you’d like to unlearn?

FINDING A REASON TO CANCEL EVERY SINGLE LITTLE THING

51. Where would you spend all your time if you could?

WALKING BY SOME RUNNING WATER

52. What age would you like to live to?

80. THATS MY MENTAL HEALTH ANSWER

53. What’s something you’re most likely to become famous for?

SOMETHING CREATIVE WOULD BE AWESOME

54. What’s something you’re most likely to be arrested for?

CRIMES

55. What’s something you really want but can’t afford?

A CAT

Lgbt+ ask game

What do you identify as and what are your pronouns?

I’m even a little shaken by a questioning state right now but for a while I’ve felt the best fit is the androgynous label -- I read a description of it being the purple on a pink to blue scale, both at once but not specifically either one, and something else by itself. I’m also happy with a cryptic masculine grey area. My pronouns are he/him.

How did you discover your sexuality, tell your story?

During the Puberty 1.0 nightmare, I was basically living someone else’s life, and any attraction I felt wasn’t in relation to myself. I felt disconnected from my body and gender and everything too, and I felt a lot of social pressure to experience a certain type of attraction, fit into a certain role, et cetera, and none of these feelings existed in me at all, so I used to identify as ace. When I realized I was trans, I was too caught up in the, transition safely, my life is a lie, stopping dysphoria drama to focus on this, but I had an idea I might be a gay guy judging from my gay creative writing until I caught feelings for a girl and realized this wasn’t the first time that had happened. Some bi positivity and nonbinary rage later, I am reminded that gender is a joke.

Have you experienced being misgendered? What happened and how did you overcome it?

Yes of course A LOT. Starting with my parents, who do it aggressively and maliciously. And plenty from strangers and customers, mostly after hearing my voice pre-transition. It used to hurt terribly because I was dealing with so much other stuff at the time, and one little thing could be the last straw, so I used to react strongly and harshly, to people you express yourself to anyway. On T, I’ve been so much more chill and confident, and it’s less painful to accept that some people just don’t know any better, although that doesn’t change its effect.

Who was the first person you told, how did they react?

I don’t remember, I think it was a high school friend. I vaguely remember texting someone in a bathroom during a crying session at work. My high school friends were all warm and supportive.

Describe what it was like coming out, what did you feel?

It was scary as hell. I’m sure coming out (with your gender specifically) is scary by nature because it’s a huge truth to be telling that can really change how the people you love perceive you, for better or for worse, but for me, I’m also thinking with the dread and certainty that my family would be too conservative and potentially dangerous. Coming out to my family was one of the worst, most painful things I’ve ever been through -- being kicked out and laughed at, a lot of drama, confrontations, Bible readings and being ganged up on at odd hours, trying to comfort my mom who took it as her personal failure -- I was shaking with adrenaline 24/7. I think of the “I’ll suffer through anything as long as it has meaning” comment that was about angsty fanfics, but knowing the truth about myself was a source of unshakable strength and it felt refreshing and even triumphant to say, like I was giving myself permission to exist for the first time. I came out a bunch of times, though...

If you’re out, how did your parents/guardians/friends react?

My family reacted mostly badly, my sister is a little confused but has the spirit, and my friends have been wonderful.

What is one question you hate people asking about your sexuality?

It’s more of a gender thing, but I hate it when people imply that I shouldn’t be on T or are subtly trying to talk me out of it with their questions. After all the disrespectful as fuck bullshit I heard from my parents, I’m tired of this.

Describe the style of clothing that you most often wear.

Zombie apocalypse denim? Gay Layers

Who are your favourite lgbt+ ships?

I’m not really emotionally invested in these “ships” you cool kids are talking about. I like canon, age-appropriate ones.

What does makeup mean to you? Do you wear any?

I’ve never really worn makeup. I brazenly never bothered to growing up, and if it had an effect on me socially, I was too tuned out to care. My sister always wanted to do my hair and makeup, but I wasn’t interested and wouldn’t let her, much to her frustration. I wore some for a musical once though, and I had no idea what I was doing and it was extremely uncomfortable. I felt what I know now is dysphoria and ended up using the lipstick to draw. Another aspect to this is my family forbade it (or my dad made the decision for everyone), not that it made my sister feel less pressured to wear it, so maybe it was some female presentation I could easily get out of. For that reason, I don’t have super strong feelings about it. Not understanding it probably resulted in me feeling left out a lot among my peers.

Do you experience dysphoria? If so, how does that affect you?

Yes. Before my realization, it was a numb horror I wasn’t consciously aware of, ruining nice things growing up to the point where I feel like I missed out on being a teenager. I remember it as feeling nauseous while sitting in a corner, feeling like none of my clothes ever fit for some mysterious reason. Living with my family in the closet, it defined my life, and I was obsessed with my presentation. These days, it does not bother me on that level at all, except a minor freakout now and then if I get really wild and wear feminine clothes. Or I still feel it in more subtle ways, when I default to customer service voice, or when guys my age are twice my height and I look aaaall the way up at them and wonder what gender they see me as.

What is the stupidest thing you’ve heard said about the lgbt+ community?

Trust me, I have heard truck loads of dumb shit and the winner is the Gay Agenda is R****a’s propaganda to weaken the integrity of North America. Considering what is happening over there, it was enragingly stupid.

What’s your favourite thing about the lgbt+ community?

I feel like I can be myself around lgbt+ people. I don’t feel like I have to hide stuff or put on a show, and I’m not afraid because it’s familiar territory.

What’s your least favourite thing about the lgbt+ community?

Aside from obvious problems like TERFs, ace discourse. Ace people are part of the community if they want to be and that’s enough on that, my skin is already breaking out.

Have you ever been to your cities pride event? Why or why not?

I finally went to a Pride event this year! I was surprised it was the first one I’d been to, then remembered my parents discouraged me from going anywhere, never mind to a gay where.

Who is your favourite lgbt+ Icon/Advocate/Celebrity?

I can’t think of many people right now, but Leslie Feinberg seems awesome, and some quotes from Stone Butch Blues are very validating.

Have you been in a relationship and how did you meet?

No. Technically I have been in one, but it was shitty and ridiculous, and basically platonic, and I don’t want it to count.

What is your favourite lgbt+ book?

I barely read… I read Aristotle and Dante Discover the Secrets of the Universe in high school and it was honestly so precious.

Have you ever faced discrimination? What happened?

Yes. I got kicked out (but then kicked back in again), had my stuff stolen and damaged, was verbally harassed… and I was indirectly fired by an employer, but We Will Never Know Why...

Your Favorite lgbt+ movie or show?

Queer Eye! I don’t know of many though, and some important ones, I just haven’t watched.

Who are some of your favourite lgbt+ bloggers?

My mutuals :D

Which lgbt+ slur do you want to reclaim?

I’m okay calling myself queer.

Have you ever gone to a gay bar, or a drag show, how was it?

No, but I did see some drag performances at the one (1) Pride event I went to, and they were jaw-dropping.

How do you self-identify your gender, and what does that mean to you?

I’m not sure what this question means, but I decide what fits right by what makes me feel the most alive and emotionally real and in the moment. What makes me feel the most attractive to be honest. There’s a post about dysphoria I saw going around, the things on it are basically what I use to figure things out.

Are you interested in having children? Why or why not?

I am actually! Not anytime soon, but I’m the responsible type for sure, and judging by the way I love growing plants and being around animals, I’m probably a nurturing person. I actually like kids too, lol, they’re just so high-energy.

What identity advice would you give your younger self?

You’re a boy. Go!

What do you think of gender roles in relationships?

I think people are going to have different ways of expressing themselves that make them happy, but… I don’t think they should infringe on basic human decency. When I hear “role” I think of acting a certain way because someone told you to, something I want to disagree with on the spot.

Anything else you want to share about your experience with gender?

People move out of my way on the sidewalk and take me seriously now. Privilege or self-confidence… I never want to forget what it used to be like, or get too entitled.

What is something you wish people know about being lgbt+?

That it’s simply living one’s reality. I think that trips up a lot of straight people -- that some people just come like this, and they don’t have to make it fit into their personal identity.

Why are proud to be lgbt+?

Because I worked hard to be alive and happy right now. I’m proud of choosing to get through those rough patches, take care of myself, heal, take walks, cook breakfast, learn healthy coping mechanisms, that was out of love for myself and a defiant conviction that I have a place in this world.

#chatty tag

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holy-mountaineering · 5 years

Text

This is @draugadottir ‘s

Thank you, as always, for donating!

You know the drill. I’ll go down the Tree from the top and then give a summary/synopsis of the spread as a whole at the end.

Think of this spread as a sort of quantum map, or even the land of a regular map, everything is happening at once, in each place. It’s important to think of yourself as moving “through” the map but you are also simultaneously everywhere at once. For the sake of this specific experiment, think of this as a map.

Where we’re starting the journey from is Kether, the monad, the first sign of creation. We’ll call this your hometown, since it is where you’re from originally. Here we have the Ace of Disks, the root power of Earth or the material. This is the foundation which all your solid structures are and will be built on. This is the very root of your real world/material life situation. While this doesn’t mean you must tear everything down or that there is nothing in your material world that you've built, it does mean you must look at the source from which you've built your material and everyday world. If you have no foundation you can have no structure. If you have a shoddy foundation, you'll have a shoddy structure. Look to what things were like where you are before you began building. Is there sand beneath you? Are you in a swamp, building castles of stone that will bind to the mud and be pulled down much sooner than later? Did you account for the raise in elevation when you laid your foundation? Look down to the base of what you've made and what you've made it upon. This is an engineering job, you’ll need tools to measure and level everything out. The occult might not be the best place to find these tools and it is possible that you have issue much more base than you're willing to cop to. There are many tools you can use to look at your foundation provided in psychology and meditation from other sources. The Universe throws us extreme situations and more often than not, this is the only way people see their basest of instincts and behaviors really act out. If you can, take a look at what connects you and what you’re building to the Earth before an earthquake, tornado, volcano, or other act of G-D forces you to pray everything was fine. Check the strength of your foundations before the strength of your foundations are checked. Get down to the base fundamentals of what is going on in your material (things, money, living situation, literal stuff) and build from the ground up if you must.

In Chokmah, which is like your freeway getting you out onto the road out of your hometown is the 4 of Cups, Luxury. This is “squaring up” emotionally and creating a greater emotional balance. Lvna the Moon absorbs the light of Sol the sun and reflects it back to Earth, but only enough emotionally to help you stay stable and protected (Cancer the crab with an exoskeleton to protect it’s soft inside parts). Don’t get too comfy though, don’t mistake squaring up (getting correct) with being a scared square.

In Binah, which is ruled by Saturn and for the sake of this reading we will call the first stop on your roadtrip. You haven’t really arrived anywhere but you’re stopping and getting a chance to repack your car in a more efficient way. Sitting in Binah is IV The Emperor, Tzaddi, Aries. The Emperor is the activating consort of III The Empress. He is King of Spring, the sign of Aries being his energy. He has the energy of the Sun, who in spring gets closer to the Earth and revitalizes the plant growth. The Emperor is formulated, active energy that causes force and growth. This is new growth brought about like the spring that Aries heralds. Like the season of Spring, this card is activating the the potential growth of the Earth, that is to say, the time is right to spring forth and grow as you can, with what you have. Get formulated and active. Put things in their place or notice the NATURAL orbits of things. What works is that which grows from your energy.

In Chesed which is ruled by Jupiter and again for the sake of this experiment we’ll say involves your influence and benevolence in your current trip is the Princess of Cups, the earthy part of Water. We could consider this the substance in water or water hitting substance head on. This is the idea of the canyon wall being ground down over the millennia by moving water. The nutrients and minerals in the earth are transported down river to the fertile delta. This is the natural, “following your feelings” within your daily life. Try not to fool yourself, follow your intuition, not just passing whims. Feel, don’t necessarily react immediately. Go with what you feel and intuit, let yourself go with the flow, if you will. Allow your situation to move with your emotions and be patient with your progress.

Across the Tree in Geburah, which is Mars Town, where you find your drive and what you’re trying to accomplish/conquer is Queen of Cups, the watery part of Water, total emotion and intuition. This Queen looks through her reflective eyes at the ripples on a pond at the reflection of the moon which reflects the Sun. She isn’t so much interested in looking directly at a thing as she is looking at the effects. The tides being ruled by the Moon was discovered by observation of the correlation of movements of both Lvna and the comings and going of the tides. Her animal is the Ibis, who on one leg intently stares at the surface of the water. This was perceived as meditation and contemplation by the wise people of Khemet and they attributed the ibis to Djehudi or Thoth the wisest of their pantheon. But like ibis you have to act when the fish swims by or you’ll starve. Do not look directly at a problem or situation you feel strongly about. Look for effects and causation not the point of impact.

In Tiphareth, the Sun and center of gravity holding all this in place, the heart pumping the blood through this, your heart is 2 of Cups, Love. Like all the 2s the deuces of Water is building towards completion. This is the ever becomingness of love. Love never dies it is simply transformed like any other energy. Love isn’t a competition or something you can measure. You never stop loving someone/thing because you have “reached maximum love levels”, shake hands and walk away from it. There is no end-game to love and that’s why it’s scary and makes people act like idiots sometimes. Astrologically, Venus in Cancer can be interpreted as nurturing your emotional growth. Build on what you’re feeling and don’t try to think about anything too concretely emotionally or intuitively. This is a building process so try not to focus on the final outcome but work with what you have now.

In Netzach, Venus town, where you have the realization about how this is going to change you as a person with a personality is the 6 of Cups, Pleasure. For reasons I call this the plumbing card. The water is not flowing freely as though it is pouring, it has been pumped through a series of tubes intricately woven together to fill the cups placed in the shape of a hexagram. Emotion and connectedness to life are intentionally being directed by unseen but invited forces. Someone who wasn’t looking closely could see nothing but knots and chaos and even wonder how the damn thing worked in the first place. Those people are squares and should be avoided at all costs. Do what gives you pleasure that also instills clarity. Center on the best you can feel even if onlookers can’t appreciate what you’re doing connoisseurs (and you) will dig it.

In Mercury Town Hod-ville, where all the Universities are and everyone has real intellectual shit going on is the Ace of Swords, the root power of Air or the mind. This is the sword of the Magus and the magician’s Sword is the physical representation of our mind and it’s ability in its rawest state of being. Thelema is inscribed on the blade of the Sword in Greek because the Magus uses their mind to the end of their True Will. The Crown of light at the tip of the Sword is the illuminated mind, because in its singleness and sharpness it is the foundation of the mind, intellect, and communication powers. Use your mind for what you need it to do. Remember that a sword is useless at best and dangerous at worst when it isn’t handled correctly. You can cut down an army with a sword, but you can also cut your whole-ass leg or arm off too with one too. Knowledge is dangerous and scary, be prepared.

On the Moon in Yesod, the receptive and reflective place that is alot about the feelings that you’re picking up from all this is the Ace of Cups, the root powers of water which is emotion, connectedness to living things, and intuition. This is the geyser of the aspects of water exploding into existence. The Ace of Cups can be like the yearly floods on the Nile was to ancient Egyptian/Kemetic people that once a year had their fields simultaneously wiped out and fertilized. There is great danger in unbound Love, it tends to get consuming and people fear being consumed. There is a secret meaning to the joining of two to make none, but this isn’t really the place for that. The uncontrolled waterfall of feeling, it can flow and be a clearing force or flood. If you’re not prepared for such water, you might get washed away, if you are it might wash away the cobwebs and your stagnancy.

Down here in Malkuth-istan, the everyday life mundane, waking up pooping, and going to work world is the 9 of Swords, Cruelty (to self, mostly). Like the other 9s this is a massive building up, in this case of Air, mind, thinking, communicating. This is beating yourself up about a decision that must be made. Astrologically, Mars in Gemini relates to action being thwarted because of a split mind on a matter. You are mentally at a fork in the road and you need to make a choice one way or another.

You’re building up a lot of ideas but you need to decide which way you want to go or it’s going to keep tearing you up mentally. There is a lot of force and mass here, move it.

Soooooooooooooo, let’s go through this progression, real quick at first.

Going to the root of Who You Are in this incarnation, nurturing that, so that you can rule properly over your Kingdom of You. Go with the Flow of You. You are Feeling Pulled a certain way for a Certain reason, follow that and trust it more than your logical Because brain wants. Speaking of that, do not allow that Because brain narrow your focus. Even in your mundane relations, look deeper and not to traumas, but at the effects. Always, like ya do, act from Love, it is what is animating you and all this mess.

You are going to grow how you want to grow, I think you’ve learned that to be true by now. You have to let that fucking logical brain go for a while so you can feel your way through this stuff your mind can’t properly deal with. And again, speaking of the mind, in order to communicate you’re basically going to have to learn a new language, your native language. And in your relations, there will be a flood, raised waters, cleansing and flushing, what remains, is what will go to seed and grow.

Not making a choice is making a choice. It is the worst of the three options you have. Pick a better one.

There it is, terrible bedside manner and all!

I’m around if you have any questions or anything, otherwise have a good night!

#tarot card readings #divination #cartomancy #occult #magick #thelema

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strikecommanding · 6 years

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Lucy

a 5k piece commissioned by an anonymous user, featuring gabe loving on their OC lucy :-) i’ve updated my commission information, which now accommodates OC requests for anyone interested!

---

A stabbing pain that lit a fire all across her shoulder blades jarred Lucy into consciousness. Her fried nerves needed a moment to wake themselves back up and hit her with an abrupt, unpleasant sensation, causing her to writhe and scream for whoever was nearby. She could hardly make heads or tails of her surroundings while in the throes of such agony, but the sight of her bed hinted that she was currently in some sort of hospital room.

The pain in her shoulder blades spiked up in intensity, causing her to thrash around a bit more violently. IV drips and various other machinery hooked up to her fell to the ground with a crash so loud that it rivaled her own pained screams. If she had to put words to the excruciating sensation, she would think her rib cage was snapping out of place to try and break free through her skin. Lucy searched frantically through her memories to pin a cause to this phenomenon, and her last conscious memory pointed to a serum introduced to her veins by the Talon scientists who kidnapped her in the first place.

By the time all sorts of people rushed in to observe her, Lucy felt just about ready to curl up and die. Her body, however, couldn’t decide what to do with itself. Lying on her back and applying pressure to the site of trauma exacerbated the pain, but so did turning over and exposing it to the air. She continued to flail helplessly until a number of hands turned her on her stomach and strapped her down.

Lucy urged herself to fight through the pain and turn her agony into coherent sentences. “What’s happening?! What the fuck did you do to me?!”

“Subject’s belligerent,” said a faceless, uncaring voice overhead. “Hit her with a shot of morphine. ...Maybe up the dosage to keep her body still and her mouth shut.”

A latex-gloved hand wielding a needle hovered close to her, and she did what she could to avoid it. However, she was powerless to her restraints and the pain in her shoulder blades, leaving her no choice but to accept the injection. Its effect were near instantaneous, as she could feel her eyelids getting heavier with every harsh breath she took. She wondered if it was really the morphine that was knocking her out, or if the agony had simply become too much for her to bear.

---

“She’s stable, sir, but the outcome isn’t what we intended,” said an impassive, uncaring voice. “We’ve achieved advanced mobility, but with those wings, stealth is simply an impossibility…”

Upon hearing the word ‘stable’ in reference to her, Lucy could have laughed. After all of the scientists’ experiments and the pain they put her through, she didn’t feel stable in any capacity. The least of which was physically, as her muscles and bones ached under the strain of foreign growths in the form of wings.

Apparently finding it unnecessary to keep their lab specimen updated on changes to her own body, the Talon scientists neglected to tell Lucy what exactly happened the night she blacked out. Once she woke up, she had to eavesdrop on some nearby nurses just to learn that she’d been out cold for nearly a week. She had yet to hear anyone speak about the peculiar, peach-colored wings that suddenly sprouted from her back, and this was the first time she’d heard anyone speak so candidly about them.

Lucy stood before a council of criminals who hid their faces in the shadows. The brightest light source in the room shone directly above her head, and it was the closest simulation she’d had to sunlight ever since she first found herself a prisoner of Talon. She had to squint just to see ahead of her, but when she found dozens of pairs of eyes staring back, scrutinizing her and trying to decide her fate right then and there, she found more comfort in simply staring at the floor.

A long silence filled the room until someone spoke up, this time directly addressing Lucy rather than talking around her. “How do you feel?”

It felt like ages since someone last asked her that, and Lucy thought of a myriad of colorful answers to that particular question. Her bones were brittle and her muscles weak, all because of an unnatural pair of wings that constantly sapped the energy out of her natural body. It was as if they, too, could tell they weren’t meant to be a part of her, as the human body simply wasn’t meant to maintain such appendages. She wanted to tell them all of these things, but this was the first time in weeks that anyone had directly spoken to her and asked for her honest words. She couldn’t resist the impulse to tilt her head back and spit out a scathing answer, “I feel like you bastards ruined me, and you don’t even know how to fix your mistake.”

The tension in the room was palpable after her bold remark, but she didn’t take it back or apologize. Instead, she maintained eye contact with the man who kept himself concealed in the shadows. She tried to make out his features and got as far as a creased forehead and tightly pursed lips before both suddenly relaxed, revealing to her a slimy smile that made her sick. “Silly girl,” he said, deliberately slow so she would hang on to each and every word. “You’re Talon’s greatest mistake, and you’re foolish to think we’d want to ‘fix’ you.”

Lucy’s eyes widened and her wry smugness dropped at the implication that she would be stuck like this for the rest of her life. It hadn’t occurred to her that they would leave her as is, neither fixing her nor killing her out of mercy, and instead leaving her to live as an abomination who suffered constant pain. Her hands curled into fists and her nostrils flared. The thought angered her as much as it scared her, but she could hardly get a word out before the man spoke up again, this time to a nearby lackey.

“We’ll observe her, see if she can take to her wings,” he said, and Lucy felt herself slip back into a sort of helplessness where everyone only ever talked about her and not to her. “We can still use her.”

---

Lucy’s unwillingness to adjust to her wings hardly put a damper on her overall recovery. Her body no longer felt like her own, as if that strange serum had reprogrammed it to follow the twisted will of her captors. The process during which her wings burst from her skin and grew out to their full span had been the most painful experience of Lucy’s life, yet she recovered relatively quickly. Just under a month was all the time her body needed to recuperate and begin recognizing those wings as merely another set of appendages.

It took some time, mainly because she was so resistant to learn in a process not unlike learning to walk all over again, but she was able to start flying. The scientists overseeing her recovery and adjustment period only ever let her practice on indoor training grounds, never allowing her too far out of sight. She couldn’t yet be trusted not to simply fly away.

Even if she were free to fly outdoors, Lucy often mused, there weren’t many places she could go. By this point in her life, all she knew was Talon, and even though they mistreated her, they kept her alive. She detested them, but she relied on them for more than she cared to admit to. For this reason, she toned down the rebellion and tried to make herself useful when Talon offered her an ultimatum: either live and work for Talon as a sniper, or die.

Though neither option was particularly appealing, one was obviously better than the other. She yearned for freedom from Talon, but not to the point of seeing death as a better way out. Begrudgingly, she accepted her role as Talon’s newest sniper under the pseudonym Siren.

It was a shaky start, but Lucy ended up being a huge asset to them. Her precision and aim were superb, and her advanced mobility afforded to her by her wings allowed for easy getaways if ever the situation called for it. This was definitely a common occurrence when they first began sending her on missions, ones that typically seemed too risky or challenging for someone on her own. Lucy had a feeling that her higher-ups didn’t intend for her to come back from those particular missions, and it might have been spite alone that fueled her and encouraged her not only to return alive, but to report back with stellar results. Whether they were testing her skill or simply trying to get rid of her, she never asked. Instead, she internalized everything and took it out on herself.

There was no personal fulfillment to be had in being a terrorist organization’s favorite toy. She had to kill to survive, but she had to wonder what the point in surviving was when every day was just like the last: do your job, keep your mouth shut, and maybe you’ll be treated decently. When she was still a fiery adolescent who had a penchant for talking back in any situation, she learned the hard way that Talon wouldn’t hesitate to resort to violence, even against a child. Over the course of the ten years they kept her, Lucy somehow came to stop blaming Talon as much for her situation and began blaming herself instead.

Her biggest gripe with herself was her wings, for varying reasons. For one, she resented them for working efficiently enough to serve Talon’s interests, effectively trapping her as their lapdog. Long beyond the habit of biting the hand that first fed her, she instead berated her own body for taking so well to their experimental serum. She detested these wings not only for the grim future they’d secured for her, but also because they made her look and feel like a monster. Ordinarily, wings carried with them beautiful and cherubic connotations, or imagery of free-flying birds who could travel the world as they pleased. Lucy’s current lifestyle as a weapon felt neither angelic nor free; she felt like a freak who needed to be fixed, and since Talon refused to do so, she took matters into her own hands.

Around the halfway mark of her captivity, when she was just shy of 20, she resorted to some destructive means to undo Talon’s work. The wings were the source of all her suffering, she’d reasoned, so she tried to get rid of them with nothing but a pair of old scissors that one scientist was too careless to notice she’d had. It had been a painful process that Lucy couldn’t finish before blacking out from the pain, and by the time she woke up, she found her wings patched up and healing extraordinarily quickly, thanks to the regenerative effect of the original serum she’d taken all those years ago. She was a monster who could kill anything but herself, and that realization made her feel helpless.

Now, however, those feelings and memories had to be stowed away. No longer the unstable wreck she’d been when the role of sniper was first bestowed upon her, Lucy had been on enough missions and taken enough abuse to realize that her only job was to get from one day to the next. Meaning and personal fulfillment didn’t matter so long as she was alive, and she could only ensure that by completing her current mission.

Talon shipped her off to a quaint little city known as Rialto, where she was ordered to take out a prominent member of the UN. It was an ambitious mission, but to Lucy, it was just one more thing to get through to prove her worth for another day.

Her target was out to dinner with a number of bodyguards to go around. In order to avoid their sightlines, Lucy was forced to set up shop a bit further than she would have liked, but it was nothing she hadn’t dealt with before. It was during situations like these that she swapped out her usual bullets for non-lethal ones, whose sole purpose was gathering intel. When fired, they highlighted a wide radius for just a moment, just long enough for her to take the shot, so long as she was quick about it.

However, these bullets still left behind casings just like their regular counterparts, and even the most incompetent bodyguard wouldn’t be so daft as to excuse a bullet casing within a foot of a member of the UN. Lucy had to take the shot before it was noticed.

Unfortunately, even from her perch located so far back from the target, she was the one who was noticed. Just as she swooped into the air and lined up to take the shot, a gun fired behind her and jarred her focus. She heard it before she felt it, only realizing after a moment that she’d been shot. The pain was so sudden and intense that she couldn’t even think to scream, nor could she get a good look at her wound or assailant before plummeting directly into the canal below.

The water was cold and bracing, especially when her fresh wound was submerged in it. Already unsteady from having been shot, Lucy could hardly stay afloat with her now-heavy wings weighing her down and urging her into the depths. She could feel herself sinking faster the more she struggled, so she took in as much air as she could before going under completely. The injury to her wing was nothing compared to the helplessness and hysteria she felt as she fell further into the depths with no signs of help nearby.

Just when she thought she couldn’t hold her breath for much longer, something else abruptly joined her in the water. Someone else, she realized upon further inspection, had jumped in after her and pulled her into their arms. Lucy didn’t know their identity or their intentions, but she was quick to cling to them anyway. She didn’t want to die, and it seemed this person didn’t want her to either.

The moment her head was above the water, she gasped for some much needed air. Her rescuer, too, was out of breath, if their heaving chest was any indication. But, as Lucy pressed her palms against their sturdy chest and felt their racing heart, she concluded it must have been more from the adrenaline of going after her than merely from having been in the water. Lucy looked up fully and stared into the chocolate brown eyes of her rescuer.

A man with dark skin and unruly facial hair looked back at her, his expression impassive and unreadbale. He carried her in his arms like she was nothing, taking great care not to press against her wound. Lucy’s eyes dropped to the shotguns holstered to his sides and she realized he was likely the one who’d shot at her.

“I’ve got questions,” he said gruffly, carrying her towards a dropship. “So you’d better not die on me.”

---

By now, Lucy was used to waking up in a hospital bed after sustaining injuries. This time was different, however, in that she found herself somewhere other than Talon headquarters. A quick glance down at the edge of her blanket revealed a particular logo, that of Overwatch, which she only knew as her employers’ number one enemy. Looking over her shoulder, she noted some bandages wrapped around the base of her wing where she’d been shot. Likely a mere formality, since her cells were surely doing a quick and efficient job at putting her back together already.

“You’re awake,” said the pleasant, lightly accented voice of a cheery blonde woman who abruptly entered the room, startling Lucy. She seemed to notice Lucy’s agitation, as she maintained a distance and lowered her voice. “How are you feeling? Are you experiencing any pain at all?”

The woman was far too talkative for Lucy’s liking after having just woken up, so she simply didn’t answer. Lucy sank defensively into her sheets while eyeing this woman with distrust. The tension that filled the air was not lost on this woman, as she simply kept to herself while bustling around the room. They both looked up when a third party joined them.

The same man Lucy had seen the night before walked into the room, and she could see his imposing physique fully now that he was under good lighting. He practically towered over the blonde woman as he approached her, and Lucy’s eyes dropped to a conspicuous manila folder clutched in his left hand. “How’s she doing, Angela?”

The woman known as Angela briefly glanced at Lucy before turning away and answering the question. “She seems stable, but I haven’t had a chance to take a look at her injury yet…”

“In that case, how about you let me take over for a sec?” he suggested, patting her gently on the shoulder as he ushered her towards the door. When she looked back at him, he raised the folder to her eye level and waved it. “She and I need to talk.”

Angela wore a bit of a warning stare as she moved to exit. “Don’t stress out my patient, Gabriel.”

He waved dismissively before pulling up a chair beside Lucy’s bed. She treated him to the same distrustful stare she’d given Angela, only breaking it to look down at the papers he pulled out of his folder. He read off of them in a neutral tone, “Siren, Talon’s secret weapon responsible for a number of assassinations over the past several years. Signature mark is bullets that emit a high enough frequency to completely shred whatever they come into contact with. That’s you, isn’t it?”

Conditioned not to talk back by years of abuse, Lucy just stared at the blanket in front of her. The only thing she really wanted to say was, “My name is Lucy.”

Gabriel maintained his unflinching gaze as he put all the papers away and shut the folder. He set it aside on the bed by her leg, and she inched away from it just the slightest bit. “You’ve been on our radar for a while. You were sloppy last night, and that’s why you got caught.”

Lucy knew that better than anyone else, so she didn’t need to be told. Instead of expressing that, she just wrung the edge of her blanket in her fists.

When she didn’t answer, Gabriel filled the silence for her. His once uncaring and impassive expression dissipated into something a bit more gentle, almost tired. “Look. We’ve had eyes on you long enough to figure out exactly how Talon got their hands on you, and everything they did. It isn’t right, what they did to you. ...Ordinarily, I’d arrest you, but Blackwatch doesn’t operate under quite the same set of rules that Overwatch does. I’ve got a proposition for you.”

Lucy looked up, astonished only by one thing he’d said. She’d never heard anyone express contempt for Talon’s sordid activities, specifically the things they’d done to her. That Gabriel looked back at her with a softer expression than what he’d had on upon first walking in only encouraged her to want to listen to him, along with inspiring a strange, fluttering feeling deep inside her chest. She cautiously kept her mouth shut, but she communicated to him with an attentive gaze that she wanted him to continue.

He leaned in, speaking in a hushed tone like he was worried someone would pick up on their conversation. “You’ve been with Talon long enough to know the ins and outs of their organization. You’ve got more intel than I can possibly imagine. Plus, they won’t expect to find one of their own against them. What I’m saying is… Blackwatch could only benefit from having you around.”

This situation wasn’t unique to her. Lucy experienced the same thing when Talon first modified her, except the alternative to joining them was to die by their hand. In this case, it was likely she would simply get arrested and that would be that. Alive, but not free, the same way her life had been for the past ten years. The situation wasn’t unique, but the outcomes being offered to her were. If she were to work for Blackwatch, she had a feeling her life could only change for the better.

Gabriel took her silence as her being in need of a little more convincing, so he went on to add, “Don’t worry about your record. I’ll take care of everything,” he assured her, and then he wore a roguish smile that brought back that odd fluttering in her chest. “I’ll take care of you.”

The idea of choosing something for herself was so foreign to Lucy that she almost couldn’t respond right away. Finally, when she gained a firm hold of herself, she nodded with confidence. “I want to join you.”

---

When Gabriel said he would take care of Lucy, he meant it. He oversaw everything from her discharge from the medbay to her adjustment period as Blackwatch’s newest agent. Blackwatch, Lucy learned, was still finding its footing as a sister organization to the all-encompassing Overwatch. As things were now, she and Gabriel were the only official members.

Consequently, they were able to acquaint themselves a bit better by going out on missions, and Lucy learned that he was actually a pretty friendly and easygoing guy despite how intimidating he looked. He was the first person to treat her like an equal, like a person, rather than the weapon Talon wanted her to be. It was for this reason that she couldn’t help but grow attached to Gabriel, and she was glad to see that he appeared to be fond of her in turn. At least, that was how she felt most of the time, but the few months they shared together wasn’t enough time to rid her entirely of the demons that festered in her mind for the past ten years.

Thanks to Talon, Lucy had her fair share of insecurities, but it was because of her environment that she never had the means to deal with them in a healthy way. Now that she had the freedom to express herself, she didn’t know where to start. So she never quite dealt with her issues, instead electing to bottle everything up.

It all came to a head one evening when she and Gabriel returned from a mission. Everything had gone fine except for a few rogue decisions on Gabriel’s part, which resulted in him getting a bit more banged up than he would have liked. Though he definitely took the brunt of the damage, he insisted that they both go and get checked out by Angela.

Despite how long she’d been with Blackwatch, Lucy never could bring herself to get along with the kindly doctor. At its core, this issue was rooted in insecurity. She still remembered the first time Angela donned her wings to go to battle, and how the sight had made the eyes of passersby shine. She was undeniably beautiful, the perfect image of an angel. But, whenever she grew tired of them, she could just take off her wings and still be adored. Lucy didn’t have that luxury. Her wings were on her for good, and they only ever made her feel like a monster.

She never expressed these feelings to anyone, however, which led to her silently stewing in the corner while Angela patched up Gabriel’s wounds. Gabriel, too, had the tendency to look at Angela with stars in his eyes, and watching the two of them interact inspired within Lucy a pain she didn’t know how to treat. She carried the burden without telling a soul, but doing so for too long made her liable to blow up. When she sensed her agitation rising to a point she would no longer be able to control, she stood abruptly and headed to her room, ignoring Gabriel as he called after her.

Lucy didn’t have much time alone before Gabriel went after her, entering the room unannounced. From her spot curled up in bed, she glared at him and murmured, “Go away.”

“Not before you talk to me,” he retorted, shutting the door behind him and moving closer to her. “What’s bothering you so much that you had to storm out like that?”

“Nothing for you to worry about,” she insisted. She tried to turn over in an attempt to cut off the conversation, but he was quicker than her. Bracing her arms and holding her still, he forced her to look at him.

“It is when you’re on the verge of tears like that,” he muttered, and his grip loosened just enough for Lucy to reclaim her limbs and swipe at her inexplicably damp cheeks. She sighed in frustration and rubbed harshly at her eyes while Gabriel took a seat on the edge of the bed. His voice took on a softer tone, the one that made her weak in the knees. “What’s bothering you, Lucia?”

Hearing him call her by her full name both made her heart skip a beat and informed her that he wouldn’t be leaving any time soon. At least, not until he heard everything she had to say. Lucy stared at her hands folded in her lap and started slowly, trying to articulate what had been on her mind for weeks now. “When I see you and Angela together like that, I just… I don’t know… it makes me feel horrible. The way you look at her is so… sweet… and it kills me to know you’d never look at me like that, not when I’m such a freak.”

Gabriel didn’t answer right away, likely soaking in her words and thinking of the best way to reply. She peeked up shyly and flinched at the abrupt contact of his hand against her cheek, only settling when she felt how gentle his touch was. The rough pad of his thumb wiped away any remaining tears, and she closed her eyes when he spoke to her, smooth and slow. “You’re not a freak. After all this time, you’re still the only one who thinks of yourself that way. As for Angela and I… we’re just friends. We’ve been working together for a while so we’re close, but we’re just friends.”

While she did feel comforted by his affirmation that his relationship with Angela was strictly platonic, Lucy felt silly for having to ask him for it. It made her feel like a child. Perhaps he could sense that she was still not fully settled, as he moved in close enough for their legs to touch. She looked up into his eyes only to have her face flush upon seeing the intensity of his stare.

“You’re always right next to me, Lucy, but you never see the way I look at you,” he remarked, letting out a soft exhale not unlike a curt laugh. When he gently placed his hand on top of hers, she didn’t move away. Instead, she tried to still her rapidly beating heart when he looked back up at her and went on, “And when you look at yourself, you never see what I see either.”

“Gabe…?” she breathed, a mere whimper in comparison to the rumble his voice had been when he made that heartfelt confession. She held her breath when the distance between her lips and his slowly began to close, his hand gently pulling her in for a sweet kiss. Unsure how to react right away, she simply sat still and let him hold her. He touched her with a sort of warmth she’d never experienced before in her life, and she wanted more of it, quickly. Her clumsy hands moved to reciprocate by wrapping around his neck and pulling his body closer to hers.

Gabriel followed her unspoken directions with ease, practically purring against her lips. The feeling of that rumble deep inside his chest as he pressed it against hers made Lucy tremble. Soon enough, she was curled up in his lap, cooing and whimpering as his teeth nipped playfully at the soft skin of her neck. His hands glided up and down her sides to feel her, all of her, before he decided that her clothes were too inconvenient a barrier.

Lucy sat back and allowed him to undress her. He moved gently, especially as he removed the fabric around her wings, and she could see the way his eyes lit up with adoration as he looked them over. She’d never seen him wear a loving expression like that, and the idea that he apparently looked at her like that all the time filled her with a mix of pride and love that she didn’t know she could feel.

Bare before Gabriel’s hungry eyes, Lucy flushed and crawled back into his lap. Her waist fit perfectly between his large hands, which held her firmly as he ground her down against the bulge in his pants. The sensation came so suddenly that she couldn’t help but yelp, at which he questioned, “You okay?”

She nodded frantically, almost whining when the delicious friction stopped. “Keep touching me.”

He responded with a smug smile, gently pulling her off of him and positioning her on all fours. She was self-conscious about having her wings on full display for him, but the thought left her mind instantly when his index finger dragged along her spine, making her shiver. His knuckles brushed gently against her soft, peach-colored feathers, and he leaned down to whisper in her ear, “Are you ready?”

Lucy bit down hard on her bottom lip upon feeling his arousal stroke against her sopping wet pussy. To know that he wanted her just as badly as she wanted him was reassuring, and she showed her enthusiasm by grinding against him the slightest bit. “Please, fuck me.”

That was all the encouragement Gabriel needed to line up the tip against her entrance and bury himself inside her in one go. Every nerve in Lucy’s body responded to his touch, even the ones in her wings as they expanded briefly before settling. She melted into the feeling of his palms against the swell of her ass, holding her in place as his movements became harsher. It wasn’t so much painful as it was purely passionate, allowing Lucy to feel all the tension that had built up between them over the past few months finally come to a head. All this time, when she thought about how much she liked Gabriel, she never once realized that the feeling was mutual.

She no longer had the time to view things in hindsight when one of his hands crept between her legs, idly stroking at her swollen clit. At that, she jolted and tightened around his cock, causing him to let out a deep, rumbling groan right beside her ear. In an effort to chase after the pleasure he offered her, Lucy bucked desperately against his hand. He got the hint and picked up the pace, simultaneously thrusting harder so that they could finish at the same time. Lucy’s toes curled and her wings expanded, every inch of her body tingling as Gabriel helped her over the edge of release.

Not long after, he pulled out with a groan and finished on her lower back. They both needed a moment to catch their breath, but he was the first to get up. He briefly disappeared into the bathroom to grab a towel and clean her up before settling in bed next to her. Lucy clung to him almost immediately, wrapping her arms around his neck and her legs around his waist. Gabriel smiled fondly as his knuckles stroked along the base of her spine, and he murmured, “Do you get that I like you yet, or do I have to spell it out?”

Lucy laughed in the form of a soft, breathless exhale as she settled against his chest. “I get it, but it’d be nice to hear you say it anyway.”

He leaned down to kiss her forehead in a way that made her truly feel loved, something she’d never experienced before. “I like you, Lucy.”

She smiled and allowed her eyes to flutter shut. “I like you too.”

#mine #commission #oc commission #gabriel reyes x oc #kidnapping #violence mention #abuse mention #self harm #consensual #what an odd bunch of tags #it's fluffy with gabe i swear

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graciecatfamilyband · 6 years

Text

Leia, Princess of Alderaaan Review*

*Really just a mixture of my thoughts/impressions/feelings. Way too long.

Note: So, after almost a year of “defending” certain choices made in Leia, Princess of Alderaan by Claudia Gray, I decided to actually read the darn thing. It might surprise people to hear I hadn’t yet, since in some ways I was a very vocal “supporter.” The truth is, I usually don’t enjoy Star Wars books very much, and prefer whatever I or my fellow fans make up instead, so I was never particularly interested. When the “controversy” hit, I never “defended” it out of any attachment to the book or its author, but out of a belief that most of the storytelling choices that were decried as out-of-character were actually legitimate possibilities for Leia’s history either in this book or in fanfiction stories, regardless of whether or not they were a part of anyone’s personal canon. It was entirely possible that LPOA itself was out-of-character trash. Based on the excerpts and summaries and spoilers I’d read to engage with the criticisms of it, it did not seem to me that it was- but I hadn’t read it, so I couldn’t definitively say. If it were trash, though, the fact that Leia speaks to people her own age or had a boyfriend (also her own age) weren’t to me among the reasons why. And that in particular is what I was so vocal about.

Finally, however, I figured if I was gonna go down in fandom history as one of the people who “supported” LPOA, I might as well actually read it and find out whether or not I actually liked it.

I’m so glad I did. I liked it *immensely.* Far beyond what I would have thought.

Here’s the TL;DR version, and then I’ll post a more detailed gushing review under the cut. Spoilers included.

1. It is as much a political thriller as it was a coming of age novel. Which is exactly my jam. 🙏🏻 I knew every major plot point going into it, and it still somehow left me dying to know what would happen next. Sure, it’s written at a “young adult” level so it’s not incredibly “advanced” as a “political thriller” goes- but it got the job done much better than I thought it could have. (And for a YA political thriller, I think it is actually incredibly advanced.) I had SO MUCH FUN reading it. SO MUCH.

2. It was practically perfect as a “prequel”. It managed to do its own thing without “stepping“ on the original trilogy at all. The backstory for Leia is good, plausible, in-character, and manages to allow her to grow (essential for a coming-of-age novel) while leaving tons of room for the character growth we see in the OT. It inevitably won’t be everyone’s personal backstory for Leia, and that’s okay. But I couldn’t find anything that wasn’t a legitimate, sensible possibility.

3. It captured this stage of Leia’s development so well, which it turns out is something that’s really important to me.

Leia was to me the perfect balance of intelligent/well-educated/innovative/tenacious and still learning the ropes as a political player. Navigating a tyrannical government and wrestling with how to respond in a way that is likely to be effective is something almost every character in this book wrestles with (save characters like Tarkin), and Leia engages with it on a level that is sophisticated even though it’s also age-appropriate. I knew a couple more things than the Leia of this book, but that’s understandable- I am much older than she is in this book, and if she knew everything already, there would be no development, no story, and indeed, there would have been no childhood for her. She is coming out of childhood in this book and learning as much as she can, and it’s just so…. appropriate, believable, wonderful. And she’s no fool; she knows a LOT, she was well and duly educated in her childhood, and she pieces together things very quickly. (I must say, she’s also much braver and more ballsy than I, which is also in-character.)

I also loved the way the book handled the changing attachment/relationship to one’s parents and the anxiety and distress that comes with that (especially when one has had a close relationship to one’s parents) in adolescence. I loved how that resolves as both the young adult and their parents learn to have a new, more adult-to-adult relationship. (It also fit my headcanon of the Organas being a loving and close-knit family, which I deeply enjoyed.)

I love how the book allowed Leia to start building much closer relationships with same-age peers, and that this was both a part of her learning to separate from her parents and define herself (not to become the same as any of her peers but to learn from them and accept certain ideas and reject others) as well as a part of her laying the foundations for the coming civil war (after all, they are going to need as many allies as they can get).

This is probably my favorite thing about it, because I am a nerd interested in and care about adolescent development. I don’t think I’ve ever read a Star Wars book that cared as much about character, character development and growth, and psychological motivations, which is why I enjoyed it so thoroughly, especially as compared to other SW books.

5. I could not recommend it more highly.

Spoiler-y unnecessary ramblings under the cut.

More Things I Loved About It

Leia loves storms. YAS.

We get to see Leia spearheading her first (legitimate) diplomatic missions!!!! And doing things on her own for the first time as an Apprentice Legislator (rather than simply as her father’s intern)!!!! And learning to exercise leadership with people who’ve known her since she was a kid! And fucking up in very understandable ways- ways that don’t infantalize her, but are normal for a young politician learning to navigate her way through this political terrain with limited information, and sometimes in ways that still trip up seasoned politicians because they are literally traps laid by the Empire. We need to see Leia make mistakes in a book like this / in any story of her adolescence, and to learn from them- and they need to be mistakes that don’t take away from her overall competence or character. This book does that very well.

I loved reading about the ways Leia attempted to learn all her parents knew and to help them in their respective positions throughout her childhood. I love that Leia interned for her dad for several years in the Imperial Senate by this point! 😍😍😍 And all the little “her dad always told her”, “her mom always said” moments in this book are just beautiful and very in-character for both Bail and Breha. I love that as Princess of Alderaan and as a member of the Organa family, Leia has always looked to them for guidance on how to rule, who to be, what skills she needs, etc. and worked hard at those things. That all seemed very in-character to me.

I love the familial and parent relationships, period. I’ve already said how much I adored the way this book represented the push-pull of the parent-adolescent relationship, and how much I love that this book nevertheless gives her loving familial relationships as her foundation. It was so wonderful to read these little moments of the Organa family, both when they were struggling and when they were finding more common ground. These relationships were also very “3D” to me, human, what I personally would “ideally” want for Leia without being “too” ideal or unreal. I didn’t know how much I needed to ready more of the Organa family all together until I read this book.

I love that this book was able to make me angry at Bail Organa (my bae 💚)- sometimes quite repeatedly- without making him out-of-character or an ass; that’s not easy to do. It was clear he had his own character struggle work through, and as difficult as that was for me as a Bail fan, it seemed in-character to me, came from a place of deep love, added layers to him, and made the intimate moments between him and Leia and the resolution between them that much more satisfying.

Breha Organa!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! 💜🙏🏻😍🙌🏻👑🙌🏻😍🙏🏻💛💜 What a queen, what a leader, what a mother. I loved watching her differ in her opinions from Bail, and handling some of the differences between them including how to approach the Rebellion, and their daughter. I found it interesting and unexpected that she accepted the reality that the Rebellion would eventually mean civil war sooner than Bail did, but in a way that worked very well.

Bail and Breha’s marriage. It’s so wonderful that they have such a beautiful partnership, in which they can wrestle with difficult questions, and disagree, and even need space from each other, and yet always come back to each other and support each other in their endeavors (and enjoy a bit of romance too). It’s exactly what I’ve always wanted and headcanoned between them.

I thought it might be distracting to me that Bail and Breha and Alderaan might vary in small ways from the ways that I have headcanoned them. For example, the pulmonodes thing is kind of aesthetically cool, and it is nice to see someone in the GFFA with some robotic/mechanical parts who is described as the opposite of evil/ the embodiment of warmth, but is a major departure from how I’ve seen Breha for years, and that kind of thing is always a struggle for me. But it turns out it’s much more difficult for me to engage with when it’s an abstract post on Tumblr. In the book, it didn’t bother me almost at all? It was subtly and well-integrated, and the character was so well-done, that it didn’t matter that’s not how I had seen Breha and is not (as of now) part of my personal headcanon.

Candlewick flowers 🕯🌹 are such a gorgeous addition to the GFFA.

I think it’s great that there was a process for Leia declaring her intention to pursue the throne and at minimum a very challenging ceremonial way she had to earn it, even if it’s not the way I would have chosen.

I’m going to go ahead and say on Alderaan they have basic guaranteed income. 👌🏻

It was so good to see the Captain Antilles of the Tantive IV and spend time on Alderaan itself (sad as it is too 😪). Like so many of the characters, I liked him and I’m incredibly sorry he’s dead within the first few minutes of ANH.

Lieutenant Res Batton is a treasure.

Queen Dalné of Naboo is a character I’d actually love to see appear in later stories (including fics) that occur during the OT or afterward. Do she and Leia meet again? In what context? What is that like??? Although her reign has probably ended by then, Dalné help with the Rebellion in any way or with the rebuilding that comes after the Empire’s fall? I like the way they connected in this book, and I’d love for her and Leia to become friends.

I had mixed feelings about Amilyn Holdo, but I appreciate that the inclusion of a female character who could be a peer to Leia and that she ultimately ended up being an important and foundational relationship both personally and “professionally.” @otterandterrier summed the good qualities of her character up to me nicely, saying, “I do appreciate [Amilyn] becomes closer to Leia, is a person who will inform her to not be set on her first impressions of people, and by TLJ is a long-time friend her age, rather than thinking all her childhood friends died.” Agreed.

Mon Mothma 😍 🙌🏻. This book cemented Mon as a new fave of mine. Great to see her be such a positive and wise mentor to Leia, and to see her be able to see things that her parents (especially Bail) cannot yet.

The cameos worked beautifully without being “too much.” Threepio’s was excellent, but Artoo’s was even better. Also, I was incredibly skeptical at the fact that there was a Millennium Falcon cameo, but it worked just perfectly. They succeeded at making the reader feel clever and “in on” it, which is 👌🏻.

Thank the Alderaanian goddess that the romance was a side-plot and not the focus! 🙌🏻 It was great to see Leia have a book that allowed her to have so many different sides, and that her romance was one of those sides but not the exclusive or even the most important focus. The book could have survived without it, but Leia’s relationship seemed to me to add to the narrative rather than take away from it.

It was such a great first romance, from a writing and story-telling standpoint. It absolutely did not threaten to overshadow the major romance of Leia’s life that most readers are so invested in, which is essential in a prequel story like this, but it was also a good experience for Leia even if it ended so sadly. I really like that the relationship was good and meaningful at the time, but it was also clearly not a relationship with longevity. This post on why Kier works so well as first love is a very good one. I also just really genuinely liked Kier as a character, even if ultimately I disagreed with him and of course don’t want him to end up with Leia “forever.”

The Chalhuddan storyline was 😍😍😍. I loved that they insist that Leia require something of them before accepting her mercy mission donation and calling out her “wealthy saviorism.” I love that she exercises good diplomatic judgment in how she handles that, and that it ultimately turns into the beginning of a potentially lasting political alliance between her and them. Again, I just love the political elements of this book in general, and this was 👌🏻👌🏻👌🏻. I’d love to see them again in fic or wherever.

I had a list of things that I did not like. I’ve already spoken about some of these in other posts. But honestly, this book gets so much vitriol hurled at it, and I loved it so much, that I just don’t want to include those things at this time.

#leia princess of alderaan #leia princess of alderaan is a fucking treasure #leia organa #bail organa #breha organa #the organa family #leia learning how to be a political and rebel badass #leia coming of age #i'd totally love to take asks about this book or chat about it #really sorry for what a mess the format of this post is on mobile #i enjoyed the movie Solo enough as a movie but it was much less satisfying to me as a backstory than LPOA was #like LPOA is much closer to possible 'canon' for me personally than Solo was #honestly thinking of rewriting Human Touch to include Kier

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kyloren · 6 years

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Mileven post-S2 fanfiction recommendation list: PART V

For past rec lists please see instalments I, II, III, and IV. If your fanfic isn’t featured, apologies. Message me and we’ll amend that grievance in the next rec list instalment.

* marks the ongoing stories.

canon:

for laughs, for luck, for the unknown by ArtemisRae: “Mike goes away to college. El goes with him. Within a year she gains a new set of grandparents, a pet, a job, and enforces party rules.”

+ its sequel the monkey in the wrench by ArtemisRae: “Mike ends up in the hospital, El has to face her insecurities, and they turn the corner with Mike’s parents.” [ArtemisRae’s works are so beautiful, I can’t breathe.]

a wonderful awful idea by ArtemisRae: “Mike wants to recapture the Christmas magic of his childhood, but mostly he accidentally makes his girlfriend cry.”

the last picture show by ArtemisRae: “Hopper catches Mike and El at the local drive in after being led to think that they were at the Hawk with their friends.”

six weeks* by bananannabeth: “There are six weeks between the night El comes home and the night of the Snow Ball, which leaves not a lot of time to deal with a whole lot of shit. Somehow, she and Mike ride it out.”

can’t argue with that by bananannabeth: “Karen is well aware of how stubborn her only son can be, but as much as he tries to pretend he has to do everything on his own, Mike isn’t alone anymore. So if he’s insisting on running to El’s rescue at the cabin in the middle of the woods at two in the morning, you can bet his mom is not letting him go alone.”

+ its prequel with background Mileven: alone by bananannabeth: “Karen left Joyce alone when she so obviously needed support, and now she’s trying to make amends. Casserole and coffee seems as good a place as any to start.” God, I love bananannabeth’s You Can Talk To Me (aka. Karen Wheeler is a Good Mom™) series so, so much.

just another sleepy sunday by suchastart: “Game night, a few years into the future.”

promises by blacktreeswhitesky: “For Jane Ives, it’s always been like this. She was always searching for something, for someone.” [I’M NOT CRYING. YOU ARE CRYING.]

how we sleep by zombiecupcake: “The gate is closed, and the gang finds themselves getting the much deserved rest they all needed.”

love you like that* by ohanae: “Snippets out of Mike and El’s life after she closed the gate to the Upside Down. They learn things together, go to school together, grow up together.”

operation christmas for el* by Booklover1217: “When the party discovers that El has never experienced a Christmas before they are horrified. That is until Mike comes up with the plan to give El the most amazing first Christmas imaginable and so Operation Christmas for El is born. The next days that follow are filled with gingerbread, mistletoe, snow, and the magic of Christmas which just may change El’s life forever.”

home by lesbeatlesbunch: “Mike gets his license.”

pretty by hma1313: “Sometimes he thinks he sees her standing at the end of the street in that ratty dress of his sister’s, the fabric torn and stained, but he’ll blink and then she’s gone and he’s half convinced he imagined it all.”

scrap my knees, whatever; i’m gonna let them bleed by ceruleanstorm: “How many compliments can Mike and El yell at each other over a card game?”

close the door by g00denough: “Because we are just waiting for when someone walks in on El and Mike kissing.”

things you said* by Brown Eyes Parker: “a collection of one-shots revolving around Mike & Eleven and things they say to each other.”

+ its sort of sequel, sort of outtakes things you said, alternate stories* by Brown Eyes Parker: “Original and alternate or continuations of stories in my “things you said” series.”

heartbeats in the quiet by screamingintosilence: “It was usually just a cold, but this felt like the flu.”

perfect summer day by AR357: “It was a sunny summer day in 1984. Mike had been looking forward to this day for a while. With each breath of crisp summer air, he felt more and more invigorated. With each hill he crested, he felt his heart thumping away. But then again, maybe he was just thinking about what the day’s events would hold.”

flutterby, butterfly* by foreverinthe_eighties: “What would happen if, years after the events that took place in 1984, Kali seeks Eleven out herself. And gives her the opportunity to change her mind.”

the name game by Strange_Archivist: “El and Mike have their first real fight, and it’s a doozy.”

eleven things* by Socalledfriend: “Eleven returns, but things don’t just go back to the way they were. It’s not clear how she managed to get home, and meanwhile Will’s sickness is only getting worse. Some things never change though, and while she’s back, Mike manages to teach her at least eleven things about the outside world.”

raspberry breeze by urdearestmom: “Sometimes she stays up with him, and she calls him ridiculous. How don't you fall over when you get up in the morning? She asks. Pfft, I don’t need sleep! Who do you think I am? He says, but then he smiles and her heart melts, she's never been able to be angry at this boy for more than a few minutes.”

promises* by Vontar: “Sometimes, it’s the little things in life that matter. Scenes of life from Eleven and Mike, as they face the future together.”

stranger things holiday extravaganza* by Commernator: “Mike, Hopper, and the rest of the party help Eleven experience holidays for the first time.”

alternative universe:

the boy with freckles like constellations in the night sky* by got credits (Poly_Grumps): “It had been a quiet night in the town of Hawkins Indiana when Will Byers disappeared seemingly out of thin air. Jane Ellie Ives could still recall her last moments with him, the last words she had spoken with him before she watched him bike off into the night. It had started like any other day in fact, with the curly-haired girl and her gang of friends all sitting around in her basement gathered around a rather intense game of dungeons and dragons!” Reverse AU. [guys, guys, guys. I’m screaming. It’s so good.]

(all i wanna be is) somebody to you* by sinclairsmax: “Elle Hopper never thought that she’d win American Idol. Then again, she also never thought Mike Wheeler would fall in love with her. Behind the cameras, everything is turned upside down.” YouTube AU. [this is everything I didn’t know I wanted.]

we could be heroes* by ValBirch: “A series of connected vignettes about our favourite characters—but with superpowers.” Superhuman AU. I repeat, SUPERHUMAN AU. [Plus, the author has a whole set of moodboards/aesthetics for characters and I’m dying.]

the artist & the dancer* by JavaCat26: “Her warm honey-brown eyes were fixated on him. Emotion washed over him like warm bath water. He wouldn’t let her down. Ever. He took a deep breath, steadied his hand, and pressed his pencil to the canvas. “I can do this…”” College AU.

upside down and back again* by Crataeis: “When a new threat begins to emerge from the ashes of the Upside Down, an unlikely group of four of our six main protagonists band together to try and stop it.” Alternative Reality? Time Travel AU? I can’t quite tell, but although this fic is in its early stages, it’s really good and worth a look.

a rose by any other name by serendipitous_rambles: “The Montague and Capulet high schools never got along. There was bitter rivalry between the two schools, nothing good could come from associating with each other. But what happens when two fall in love?” Romeo & Juliet-style High-School AU.

+ bonus: wherein The Party is featured prominently…again:

in a dream where the air is soft by a simple space nerd: “El has hair slicked back behind her ears, darkly ringed eyes, and somewhat bedraggled clothes, and Max would normally steer clear of people looking like her, but she’s heard so much about El, and God, why is this group of friends so unlike everyone else Max has ever met? Max never used to care about what random people thought of her. “Curse you, stalker,” she mutters half-heartedly.” [I love Mike and Max in this one. This has to be my favourite interpretation of both characters, hands down. This fic is so in tune with characterisation, it can be considered canon.]

more than one best friend by topangamatthews: “El’s first best friend is Mike, but he’s not her last.”

after the gate closed* by insomniacwriter17: “Just one shots about all the little head canons I have.”

el’s word book* by Noth_lit_9: “El is frustrated that her vocabulary lags behind those of her friends, so Hopper wants to provide her with a way to see her growth.”

it’s okay to not be okay by talesfromthesnogbox: “Jim Hopper knew it was a real emergency when he was woken in the night by a phone call from his son-in-law Mike from the hospital. All was not well, but Jim reminds Mike that sometimes it’s okay to not be okay.”

teenage girls by EvieSmallwood: “El & Max hang out at the arcade. They talk about the present and the future.”

a is for alphabet* by urdearestmom: “Each chapter is a letter of the alphabet, lots of fluff and laughs ensue.”

so i could kill them for you by valancysnaith: “Max deserves so much better. The party is there for her.”

okay, so I had a lot more, but my Cloud messed the fuck up and deleted half of the bookmarks I made. now, I gotta go and track down the fics I lost…

UPDATE: part VI is out.

#mileven #mileven fanfiction #mileven fanfiction recommendation list #mileven fanfiction recommendation #character: mike wheeler #character: eleven #pairing: mike x eleven #tv: stranger things #fanfiction recommendations #in this tag resides fanfiction #♔: victrix #*

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