#it’s VERY funny but Colin what the FUCK is your deal what HAPPENED TO YOU
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zac’s “less is more” approach to comedy is always golden but it is working PERFECTLY for colin provolone from both a comedic and dramatic standpoint. everyone else I kinda get the vibe of but colin is Just Some Guy which is driving both me and raphaniel up the fucking WALL.
#it’s VERY funny but Colin what the FUCK is your deal what HAPPENED TO YOU#he’s just some guy we know nothing about his past but we KNOW he has Some Kind Of Past#what kind of past? what happened? we don’t knowwwww#and the whole story treats him as Just Some Guy which is so funny but also like. what the fuck!#but my actual point is like#I love that zac can just stay on the sidelines without anyone really thinking about it#like he doesn’t take up scenes very much#which is cool but sometimes works to his character’s detriment#but here? perfect.#much easier to keep Colin as Just Some Fucking Guy when he barely talks#anyway. zac oyama is very talented that is all.#dimension 20#the ravening war#colin provolone#d20 spoilers#zac oyama#bishop raphaniel charlock
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I've been thinking about the very real possibility of Laszlo finding a cure a lot lately, and just generally how much I'd love to see the gang as humans-- not necessarily permanently or endgame, but just... for a little bit.
Like, they've all been in such ruts, probably much, much longer than we've known them, but certainly more now that they've all grown so close to Guillermo. And with Guillermo, and his purpose being to bring a sense of humanity back to everyone, it really would do them all well to experience life again, just to put their current (good!) lives into a better perspective.
Nandor grew up in war, Nadja grew up in poverty, and Laszlo grew up literally never smiling. They deserve to experience real humanity again now that they're allowed to have peace and love in their lives. Laszlo experiencing sunlight for the first time was moving enough, so just imagine how much older vamps like Nadja and especially Nandor would bask in it. They could all eat food they've never dreamed of, go places they've never been without worrying, meet people they never would have met. For the first time in hundreds of years they don't have to shut their brain off and take a life to feed. And doing it all together, as a fucked up little polycule family, for the first time ever.
And like, being human sucks, and they can lean into that a lot! Even Guillermo just being there means he's basically got a bunch of toddlers on leashes making sure they don't run into traffic. But those issues can just be... so funny. Just simple goofy Human Things that shouldn't be funny but are funny because we've never SEEN these characters in these situations. Who doesn't want to see theme at a theme park, or starting a bar fight because they're all assholes, or someone learning they have food allergies, or just simply the running gag of Laszlo hopping in place while trying to BAT! and forgetting that he just can't do that.
Then at the end of the day, hey, surprise, they all want to be vampires! Because being a vampire is cool when you're not like, horribly depressed or don't see the joys of life or don't know what you want to do with your time. They literally all could just use a good metaphorical Lay On The Floor to embrace it all.
Also it's like... maybe one or two of them DO end up do having mixed feelings. Imagine what would happen if only one half of Ladja decided they wanted to stay a human? Or if they wanted to enough for them to try to have a child they didn't know they wanted? Or maybe The Guide gets wrapped into this and she's like, I fell in love with this human, I didn't get to have a life in the past, I don't even REMEMBER my life in the past, I think maybe this would be way more fun. Or in the same vein, Colin now KNOWS he is stuck in this vicious cycle, and maybe he doesn't want to keep at it? He doesn't like not remembering, and he certainly doesn't like having to put others through it all, and he maybe there's something that means he can't just be a Normal Vampire so he just ends up having to decide if he wants to go back to that.
And then like... the Nandor of it all. Arguably the most tragic of them, given his past and his present and now his future. While it's undeniable that Guillermo's arc SHOULD end with him turning (and turning the right way for the right reasons), right now it's like... that's it for Nandor. Nandor did so much in that finale, including killing another vampire, JUST to be able to offer what he can never have to the one person in hundreds of years that he really has ever connected with on this level. And now that person has an official time limit, and he has to deal with that, and it's just... he deserves to get what he wants as much as everyone else, and what he's wanted for the entire show is someone who understands and accepts and loves him. And while there's a very real and relatable feeling of him having to accept that "everything good ends"... why not let him decide he would rather it end together. Nandor giving up immortality just to live out a full real life with Guillermo is the most romantic shit they could do. Full Iris by Goo Goo Dolls moment. They'd be equals, and neither of them would carry the guilt of living the other's dreams in front of them, and they'd no longer be living with that danger that's hung over them.
And again, like... they should all end up vampires. That's fucking rad and they are just so special and are people who WANT to do (an albeit untraditional) good and enjoy life to the fullest. But damn, if a dynamic and perspective change for them all wouldn't open up a whole realm of possibilities for both the show's comedy and their deeper character growth.
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Ahhh you don't know how much I fucking love your friends au !!!
Two thing first do you have any director cut from TOW the bump on the head?? Also I re-watching friends (much thanks to you) and I came to the episode of where Ross is super gloomy because its the day he and Carol slept together and it just really remind be on Benedict and Sophie. Ik its on New Year but I just like thought that all of his sibling are wanting to strangle him just because he saw bus sign and now he moping because he misses his lady in silver.
So for TOW The Bump On The Head I didn't originally intend to have Eloise and Edwina hooking up at the end, it was just something that I decided to incorporate as I wrote it out. From TOW The Bridgerton Family Dinner in the midst of Eloise opening her Pandora's box to Phillip it's been established that Eloise and Edwina had once been a thing, and while it was always going to be the case going into this recent story, I was just planning on treating their dynamic as friends who were once lovers and leaving it at that. But as I was writing the story I thought it'd be fun to have Kate telling them not to get it on while they were babysitting her son, and from that I thought it'd be funny to have Eloise lowkey trying to hit on Edwina in a "haha I'm joking btw, unless you're dtf?" type way. And while it's more plainly obvious that Eloise is up for a casual hook-up, very very very lowkey Edwina was also kind of hoping for a hook-up and when she walked into Kate and Anthony's kitchen and saw Eloise there she couldn't help but think the timing was perfect. Of course Edwina is going to act as if she's not interested just to enjoy making Eloise think she's got to work for it, but then she does genuinely get frustrated about the situation that unfolds while they're babysitting and when Eloise is back at hers she truly is riling her up - so while she hadn't planned to cut to the chase to initiate getting off with Eloise, she figured she'd be killing two birds with one stone by getting the hook-up that she wanted while also shutting Eloise the hell up.
And as for the storyline you mentioned of Benedict being mopey like Ross, that is definitely what happened. And he wasn't just moping on the two New Years that passed by before he met Sophie again; it was anything that even vaguely reminded him of her. Whenever the family went to Aubrey Hall Benedict would heave a melancholy sigh and say, "the Lady in Silver said she loved the countryside". Whenever there was a full moon he would sigh because it had been a full moon that New Years, or whenever fireworks went off he would sigh because of course there were fireworks going off on New Years. And even when the Bridgertons had Countdown playing on the TV Benedict would tear up at the familiar tune playing along with the show's countdown clock because he kissed the Lady in Silver after the countdown to midnight - at which point one of his siblings would pull the TV plug right out from the socket out of pure frustration for their brother's over the top self-pity. And just like in the very first season of Friends whenever Ross appears and greets the group with the weariest and beaten down "hi", I can imagine Benedict greeting his siblings in the same way for those two years without Sophie and it going something like this;
Benedict: Hi.
Colin: This guy says hello, I wanna kill myself.
And so you can only imagine the family's collective relief when Anthony bursts back home and tells them all that not only is the Lady in Silver real (for a long while the majority of the siblings were starting to think perhaps she had just been a figment of his imagination) but that Benedict's found her and she just so happens to be living across the hall from the brothers. And while Sophie doesn't actually remember Benedict and the pair don't date for another year and a bit, at least the melodramatic moping comes to an end. (Yes, it is replaced by incessant pining but it's easier to deal with than the moping at the very least.)
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so you lied
warnings: angst :///// but with a resolution
wordcount: 2.5k
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After two Princess Diaries movies and three bottles of wine into the night, Rafe, Julia and Allie were sufficiently tipsy - Rafe a little more so. He had insisted on ordering pasta to the girls’ house and Julia kept Sophie updated with several Snapchats, captioning the first with ‘your sugar daddy is my favorite person tonight.’ (Sophie just sent back ‘you’re the worst.’)
“You guys are fun. I miss Sophie though.” Rafe lamented as the movie ended, taking another sip of wine. He hadn’t paced himself as well as the girls did and was amusingly drunk - Julia’s encouragement and constant refills didn’t help.
“You’ve told us that three times now, buddy.” Allie grinned.
“Yeah.” He mumbled. “She’s not gonna be happy with me.”
Julia sat up, eyebrows raised. “Why? What’d you do?”
“I did nothing.” Rafe paused. “Well. Maybe I did something by doing nothing.”
Allie frowned and reached over, kicking at his foot. “Spill.”
“I spilled?” He looked down at his glass and patted his shirt. Julia laughed, shaking her head. “No, Rafe. Tell us what you did. Or...didn’t do.”
“Oh.” He took another long drink of wine. “Colin told me not to.”
“I will take your wine away if you don’t tell us.” Julia threatened, reaching for his glass, and he held it back out of her reach. “No! No, I’ll tell. I’m working with Brooklyn.”
“Like...your ex, Brooklyn?” Allie clarified.
“Yeah. She’s at my internship and she sucks. I didn’t tell Sophie she’s there.” He groaned, letting his head flop back against the couch. “Soph’s gonna kill me.”
Both the girls sat there, processing what he had just shared.
“I messed up, didn’t I?”
Julia nodded. “Big time.”
“You have to tell her, Rafe. Soon as you can.” Allie told him, but grabbed his phone out of his hand when he pulled it out of his pocket. “Not now though. You’re drunk and she’ll think something’s wrong.”
“Ughhhh.” He grumbled. “Colin said I shouldn’t tell her because I shouldn’t make her stress.”
“Yeah, Colin’s single for a reason.” Julia quipped, rolling her eyes. “Look, I don’t even know this girl, but I know she’s trouble. She made Sophie cry after that gala you guys went to.”
He frowned, sitting upright. “She cried?”
“When she told us the next day, yeah. She was pretty upset.” Julia took his glass and refilled it, ignoring Allie’s elbow to her side. “What happened with her?”
“Sophie?”
“No, your ex.”
“Jules.” Allie chastised, sending Rafe a sympathetic look, but he shook his head. “S’alright. Our dads kinda set us up, and she was easy to be with, at first. Then she got kinda, uh.” He paused, trying to think of the right word. “Controlling? I dunno. One time I told her I had to go meet with some girls for a group project, and she accused me of cheating and told me I was a horrible person, then didn’t talk to me for days until I apologized. Which is kind of messed up.”
“Shit.” Julia mumbled. “You deserve better than that.”
“I have better, with Sophie.” He pointed out, then sighed. “She’s really gonna hate me.”
“She’s not going to hate you, Rafe.” Allie handed him a water bottle, tugging a little to take the wine glass away.
“It’s easy to hate me.” He told them matter-of-factly, and they both frowned, unsure on how to deal with him in his drunken state. “It’s not, bud, we like you.” Julia countered, then stood and offered her hand. “I think it’s time to go home, don’t you?”
“No, fuck, I can’t go to Colin’s. I’m sober. Wait. No, I’m not sober.” He accepted her hand and let her tug him up, throwing his arm over her shoulders for support.
“Jesus. Okay. You can stay in what’s gonna be Sophie’s room, but if you throw up, I’m telling her. Five glasses of wine, Rafe, this is weak.” Julia rolled her eyes and he patted her head affectionately. “You guys are the bestest.”
Allie followed behind them up the stairs, hands out to catch him if he tripped and fell. Once they got up, Rafe stood in the doorway, swaying a little. “We should call Sophie.”
“It’s, like, 5am there buddy, she needs to sleep.” Julia insisted, steering him toward the bed that Sophie bought before leaving and had thrown a couple blankets on top.
“Oh, you’re right. She needs her sleep.” He sighed, curling up on the bed and wrapping a spare blanket around himself. “I miss sleeping with her.”
“Gross.” Allie muttered, nose wrinkled.
Rafe shook his head, insistent. “No! No, not like that. But also like that. Both.”
“Okay. We don’t need to hear it.” Julia laughed and tugged his shoes off for him. Allie set a water bottle on the nightstand. “No calling Sophie, okay?”
“No calling Sophie.” He repeated, nodding. “Angel needs sleep.”
Julia pretended to gag. “You two are so cute, it’s disgusting.”
He yawned, pulling the blanket tighter. “I’ll set you up with James again if you want. Sophie said no but she’s not here to decide so we’re allowed to do whatever we want to do.”
She laughed, subtly taking a photo of him to send to Sophie. “That’s okay. Sleep tight, Cameron.”
He merely nodded, closing his eyes. The girls left the room, quietly shutting the door behind them. “We have to tell her, don’t we?” Allie asked, frowning.
Julia shook her head. “No. He’ll tell her, we’ll just remind him in the morning.” She paused, thinking. “He’s good for her.”
Allie nodded in agreement. “He is.”
_____
The next morning, a very hungover Rafe was sent on his way out the house with a bacon, egg and cheese bagel and a lecture from both the girls. His head was spinning and he felt nauseous, though he wasn’t sure if that was from the wine or anticipation of having to tell his girlfriend he lied.
“Omitted the truth,” he had tried arguing with Julia, who promptly socked his arm. “No. You lied. Nice try.”
Once he was home in Colin’s parents house, tucked away in his room, he had to give in. Sophie picked up the phone on the third ring like always, a little sweaty and breathless. “Hey, Rafe, can I call you back?”
“I - uh, can you talk now?” He asked, rubbing the back of his neck anxiously. She frowned, picking up on his stress and flushed cheeks. “Um, yeah, just let me find a spot to sit. Are you okay?”
He nodded, not wanting to tell her much more. “Are you running?”
“No, working out in the park.” She flipped the screen to show a gorgeous grassy green park view looking out over the ocean, with clear blue skies. “I was almost done, anyways, you’re saving me from crunches,” she flipped the screen back, grinning. “What’s up?”
Out with it, Rafe. He told himself in his head, feeling sicker by the second. “So, uh, you know my internship?” He cursed himself internally the second he spoke. Of course she knew about his internship.
“Yes…?”
“Right, yeah. So we have this group of interns, and we’re required to do this weekly events, you know. So, yeah, that’s pretty cool, I guess.”
Sophie frowned. “Rafe, what is up with you? You look like you’re about to throw up, did you really drink that much last night with the girls?”
He scowled, trying not to think about the alcohol. “No, just. Thought I just probably share that Brooklyn is one of the interns too. My ex,” he added for unnecessary clarification.
“Oh.”
That was it? He thought, pleasantly surprised. “Yeah. That’s all, you can finish your workout. Sorry to bug you.”
“She’s been working with you? Is this new?” Her tone was scarily even, her face showing zero emotion.
Oh. So maybe he wouldn’t be getting out of it that easy. Rafe swallowed, knowing he was in trouble. “Um, no. She’s been there since week one like me.”
“So you lied.”
“No!” He scrambled to come up with an explanation. “I thought - Colin thought - we figured it might be better to not have you worry -”
Her voice turned incredulous, on the verge of breaking. “You thought it would be better to lie and not tell me, rather than openly communicating? Isn’t that exactly what she did to you?”
Suddenly it all made sense why she’d heard about three things total about the internship he’d been working for nearly a month.
He felt his stomach drop and a wave of regret wash over him. “I fucked up, Sophie, I’m sorry. I should have told you.”
She shook her head quickly, not wanting him to see her cry. “I have bad signal. I have to go.” It was a shitty excuse - the picture was crystal clear - but she hung up right away anyways. Never mind him wanting to say a million more words to apologize, him trying to find the words to explain. He tried calling her back immediately, but she rejected the call - twice - and he figured he should just give her space.
_______
She called him back at around midnight her time, when he had just gotten home from the store. “Hey, Soph.” He answered with a gentle tone, a little wary.
“Hey.” She murmured back, equally quiet. “Can we talk?”
“Should I be worried?” He joked.
“Rafe.”
“Sorry.” He immediately apologized. “Not funny. Give me a second to get my things inside and I’ll facetime you?”
“Yes, please.”
“Okay. Just a couple minutes, angel, I won’t make you wait long.” He hung up and practically scrambled to get in the house, offering a quick greeting to Colin and his family before locking himself in his room and shoving a towel under the door to soundproof as much as he could, then called her back. “Hi, told you I wouldn’t make you wait.”
“True to your word.” She mumbled. Her eyes were a little red and puffy, and he could immediately tell she was anxious from the way she chewed on her lip. “Can you just be honest with me, please?”
“Yeah, anything. What do you want to know?” He frowned, hating seeing her so upset and knowing he was the reason for it.
“I know you would never do anything, I’m not questioning that. But why did you lie? That hurts, Rafe.” She took a deep breath, willing herself not to cry again.
He sighed, rubbing his temple. “I thought I would be able to avoid her, and I didn’t want to stress you out when you couldn’t do anything from so far away. I’m sorry. I was wrong.”
“Yeah.” She agreed. “Are you working closely with her? More than you thought?”
He grimaced. “Yeah. Not just her, it’s all the interns, but we have a dinner or we go to the bar almost every week. And she kinda, um, goes out of her way to hang around.”
“Oh.” She murmured. “Has she tried anything?”
“Meaning…?”
“I don’t know.” She paused. “I don’t know if I want to know that much, actually. You’re right, I can’t really do anything. She knows we’re still dating though, right?”
He nodded quickly. “I have a picture of us pinned up on my desk, it’s hard to miss. And I’ve made it clear.”
“Hm.” She scowled, clearly wrestling with how to deal with the situation. “You promise you’ll tell me if she, like, asks you out or something though, right?
“Yeah, of course. We’re always at work or work events anyways, so. She’s fairly, uh, limited. I think.” He shrugged. “I won’t let anything happen, okay?”
“I know,” she nodded. “I just don’t like her being around when I’m not. She hardly held back when I was there at the gala, I don’t even want to know what she’d be like without me there. Are you doing alright, though?”
“Uh, yeah. It’s fine.” He hedged, not wanting to worry her further.
“You’ve hardly told me anything about her.” She pointed out. “What happened?”
Rafe winced, rubbing the back of his neck. “Do we have to talk about it?”
“No, I’m not going to make you, but. I would like to know.” She raised her eyebrows. “I can tell you about my exes if you want?”
“Soph -” he started, but she rambled on.
“Or the guy I lost my virginity to? I think he came in like, half a minute, it was sophomore year -”
“Sophie! No, stop, I don’t want to hear it.” He gave her an exasperated smile and she brightened a little, glad she was able to somewhat turn the mood. “Another time, okay? I don’t really want to talk about her anymore. I miss you.”
She softened, nodding. “I miss you too. I wish you were here already, I feel like everything reminds me of you.”
“Yeah? Like what?” He settled back against the bed, content.
“The mangoes at the market, because you always get that mango smoothie in the library when you’re studying with me. And when this guy Mateo, at work, he has the best handwriting and he writes in that same cursive-print hybrid that you do. Oh! And I got you a shirt yesterday but I can’t show you, it’s a surprise.” She reached across her bed to her nightstand, pushing a brown bag out of view.
He laughed, shaking his head. “Tell me about this Mateo kid. He’s the one that called you Sofia, right?”
She raised her eyebrows, grinning at his complete lack of effort on an accent. “Sofía.” She corrected.
“So-fee-a.” He repeated slower. “How do I say, this is my girlfriend?”
“Um…este es mi novia. Wait, no. Esta? I’m not sure.” She hid a yawn behind her hand.
“Tell me more?”
“In Spanish, yeah. I like listening.” He smiled at her yawn.
“Alright, let’s see. Um…” She trailed off, going into a slightly stilted description of what she did that day, then gave him a proud smile once she finished. “Not bad, right?”
“Not bad at all! I mean, I have no idea what you said,” he grinned, “But you sound great. Practically a local.”
“Shut up.” She yawned again and rolled over, pulling her pillow to her chest. “Tell me about your day. Even the boring stuff.”
“Alright.” Rafe started telling her, keeping his voice low and soothing, and it wasn’t long before he could tell she was half-asleep. “Sophie, baby?”
“Mm?” She mumbled, squinting one eye open.
“Go to sleep. I love you.”
“Love you too.” She murmured, nodding. “You’re my favorite, no matter what.”
“No matter what.” He echoed, nearly whispering by now. “Miss you.”
She was already asleep, her ring resting on its chain around her neck and on top of her pillow. He had half a mind to say something and tell her to take it off, but just watched her for a few more moments before hanging up.
taglist: @whoeveniskendall @kkmaybank @karsinner @outerbanksbro @outerbankspreferences @randomficsandshit @sunshineitsfine44 @jailcalledlife @tovvaa @moniamaybank @illbesafeforyou @dontjinx-it @freddymaybank @jjmaybankzz @g4bster @oopsiedoopsie23 @babygal-babygal @thecuthoney
#rafe cameron#rafe cameron fanfic#rafe cameron fanfiction#outer banks#outer banks fanfic#obx fanfic#college rafe#frat rafe#mine#rafe x sophie
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5x03 The Death Song of Uther Pendragon
Arthur went out to collect firewood while Merlin watched over the dying lady 🥺
They saved a woman from being burned at the stake for sorcery and she repays them with a super powerful magic artifact
"He's always like this at the anniversary of his coronation."
"I thought it was a cause for celebration?"
"It is, but it's also the anniversary of Uther's death."
I would like to refer everyone back to my 4x03 post where I point out that Uther was stabbed on Arthur's birthday, which is also the anniversary of his mother's death. Uther would've died a day or two later. So within the span of let's say, half a week, Arthur's got his birthday, his mother's death anniversary, his father's death anniversary, and his coronation. He needs a hug. It's gotta be the hardest week of the year for him, every year. Speaking from personal experience, I know I wouldn't be anywhere near as upright as Arthur is, for all his thousand yard staring.
It's a very nice sarcophagus but what is going on with Uther's left leg?
No srsly wut is this
Is it reeeeally swollen? Did he break his ankle in the fight or perhaps when he fell?
Ok I'll stop being mean
The ONE time Merlin knocks
You think this was a sex thing? I think it might've been a sex thing.
Spirit!Uther, while traumatizing in his own right, still isn't as frightening as actual King Uther could be.
Oooof I have Things To Say™️ about this. The reason Arthur chooses to use the horn, to use magic, is because, "there isn't a day that goes by when I don't think of the thing I wish I'd said to him." But when he gets to speak to Uther, he doesn't actually get to say very much at all, because Uther immediately begins criticizing everything he's done as king. Arthur doesn't get what he sought at all, instead of an opportunity to tell his father any of the things he wished to say, he gets spoken to, harshly criticized. It's a major blow. And he says as much, when the single man tear spills over and he says "this can't be the last time I ever see you" - yes the line is foreshadowing Uther's haunting of Camelot but it's also signaling that Arthur's been traumatized; he went from having had his father mortally wounded in saving Arthur's own life, to having seen his father 3+ years into Arthur's rule as King of Camelot, and point blank being told Uther is disappointed in him. Not proud of him - actively un-proud. We don't really know what exactly Arthur wanted, if he'd hoped his father would've seen all the good his way of ruling had done and praised him, but I think it's pretty safe to assume that was on the wish list.
Be careful what you wish for indeed.
I AMUSE MYSELF. (I spent two hours figuring out how to create this please appreciate me)
Merlin's angry face when Arthur tells goin what Uther said is literally all of us.
I feel terrible for this but when Percival is leaving Gaius' chambers and he stops to look at the wall-torch, I immediately flash backed to Alice Troughton on commentary in S4 saying "Percival's a bit of a wuss isn't he?"
This is also awful but this episode kind of makes me miss the castle-centric contained episodes of S1
Never any guards around when you're being attacked by the ghost of your husband's dead dad, typical.
I understand Merlin bringing Guinevere to Gaius but putting her in Merlin's bed??????
The way Bradley and Colin both convincingly jumped when they turned around and found Gaius had snuck up right behind them kills me every time.
"Poetry". What he means to say there is, 'why didn't you just tell him we were fucking, since that would actually sound less gay'
So. Merlin took the ghost visibility potion but he can't see Utter knocking over barrels and shelves and things to trap in that store room.
Also why is there a pigeon in a windowless store room? Now I'm wondering why there aren't more birds randomly flying into the citadel, cuz they do have quite a lot of open windows... you'd think that might happen now and again.
Mmmmmmmm
Hmmmmmmm
Ooooof I love a bamf husband coming through to deal with a shit-for-brains abusive father... ghost.
^^actual canon scene
Was Tony shot entirely on green for this? That unearthly blue glow even in close ups where he doesn't look like he's on a green scene makes me wonder.
The 'horseplay' scene at the end was so full of sexual tension and d/s undertones that I literally do not want to say anything lest tumblr flag this post for content.
Commentary is Angel and Rupert. The two regulars who were in the least number of scenes in this ep. Since this post is already crazy long I'll keep this brief.
Aaaaand it's the first time either of them have seen this episode 😂 wow.
They've made 'horn' jokes and Rupert's gone full on tongue in cheek dad jokes.
They are also cracking jokes on Colin being all jacked up for S5 compared to previously when he was so skinny hehe... personally I ain't mad at him 😂
Fifteen minutes into the episode and Leon makes his first appearance
The little bottles and decor things in Gaius' chambers are part of a static set so they pretty much just sit there... Angel says that some of the contents have started to go moldy and they found maggots in one of them 🤢
They're talking about Gwen's new hair and while Angel is being really diplomatic, I get the impression she's as annoyed as I am by it. It literally doesn't match her own hair at all. But she also said some people saw her without the piece on and just said 'omg you cut your hair' so I guess 🤷♀️
The scene where Gwen is knocked out by a vase smashing her head - Angel says she was hit with the heavier bottom piece of it, which hurt more than she was expecting, and she wound up with a bump on her head from it.
Not a word about Colin picking up Angel 😢
They're talking about childhood pets and a beverage called lilt? Anyway Angel is really clever and Rupert's corny af but he's funny and I love them both.
Oh this is interesting: Rupert says he and the director talked about having Leon walking through the corridor hand in hand with the cook when he stumbles upon Merlin and Arthur's 'poetry lesson', but they weren't allowed to do that bc it would've been just a little bit too much, or a little too tongue in cheek. Which I'm taking to mean, would've accentuated the subtext of 'poetry' too much.
Angel and Rupert didn't know how they got Uther all glowy either, though Angel said it was probably lighting
Rupert says the line where Utter got caught off, what he was gonna say was "Merlin has ... been to the gym!" 😂😂😂😂😂
They really are great together doing these things
Rupert's story was the horse he had been riding all season had a foal, and nobody even knew she'd been pregnant. They just came out one morning and saw she'd given birth, and he got a call to inform him. That's kind of sweet. I wonder if he sent them some apples or something.
#bbc merlin#bbc merlin spoilers#merlin#merlin spoilers#merthur#onceandfuturerewatch#5x03#5x03 the death song of uther pendragon#bbc merlin 5x03#merlin 5x03#the death song of uther pendragon
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Our Voyage
For @secretagentfan
You said pirates and magic and my brain went “YES”, and then I tried to add as many of the other things you mentioned that were possible within the story. Then things got a bit out of control—and by that, I mean this wasn’t supposed to be this long, but at some point it had a life of its own I couldn’t do much except try to type as fast as I could. It’s my first time writing an AU, ever, so I hope you enjoy this little universe that was born thanks to your prompts. It’s been a rough year, I think we deserve some adventures and boys in love as a treat. Merry Christmas! and Happy New Year. (It really is a long read, so get comfortable <3)
~ @aoicanvas
***
Shion wakes up to shouts coming from above. He must have fallen asleep reading, trying to decipher some of the most obscure passages of the book that’s supposed to guide them.
The sixteen years of his life spent in the Blessing didn’t prepare him for any kind of confrontation. He would like to think that the four subsequent years in the Pious Ward had hardened him —and yes, in some ways they had— but nothing could really prepare him to hear Rikiga’s voice coming from the main deck, shouting “PIRATES!”.
His mind halts to stop.
He looks around the small storage room he is cramped in. Barrels and crates would certainly provide a good hiding spot. But to what end? What if they found him?
Standing up, at least, seems like a good place to start. He picks up the book to hold it against his chest, and there isn’t time for much else before he hears footsteps approaching.
“I’ll take this one,” says a voice he doesn’t recognize, right before a woman walks into the room. The first thing he notices is the sword she holds in one hand; the second, the ridiculous feathered hat that obscures her face. The poor light in the room, coming from a lonely candle on the table, isn’t helping either. “A scared little mouse!”, she says, bringing him out of his stupor. “Everyone’s on the main deck, darling, you’re missing out. Follow me outside and don’t try anything funny, I wouldn’t want to hurt you.”
Shion speaks before his brain processes the words.
“Like what? You’re the one with the sword.”
The woman looks taken aback for a split of a second. But quickly replaces it with a sharp smile. “You’re right about that, which is an even better reason for you to do as I say. Come, we have business up there.”
Shion forces himself to walk towards her, slowly, even though all his instincts scream at him to do something.
And then, he passes right in front of the candlelight.
The woman freezes.
The moment lasts only a heartbeat. In an instant, she lifts her sword until the point almost grazes Shion’s chin.
“Wait,” she says, and there is a strange change in her voice. “What’s your name?”
Shion swallows, hoping his voice hasn’t deserted him yet.
“Shion,” he answers, not expecting the woman to curse under her breath, sword dropping to her side as she rubs her forehead with her free hand.
“This is just my luck.”
“I’m sorry? Did I do something?”
“Plenty,” she drawls as she points the sword at Shion again, only with considerably less enthusiasm this time. “I’m looking for a certain book. Nondescript, written in Laidoan. Wouldn’t it happen to be what you’re holding right now?”
Shion instinctively hugs the book tighter to his chest. That is, apparently, all the answers she needs.
“Great! This is—great. Excellent,” she continues with fake cheer. “I’m assuming you know Laidoan? Of course you do, that was a stupid question. Now—” She takes a step to the side, making a grand gesture with her sword towards the open door. “You’ll get out and go directly to the deck, understand? And don’t even think about trying anything funny. It wouldn’t go well for you.”
Shion doesn’t know how he gets his legs to move. He’s scared but somehow, he walks past the entrance, down the narrow hallway and up the steps to the deck. He can hear the footsteps of the woman behind him. And once he reaches the top, he can see the rest of the crew. They are all kneeling down on a line, their hands behind their backs. Except Rikiga who’s lying on his side and holding his arm close to his chest. His hand is stained red with blood. Drazh, his first mate, is in a similar condition on the other end of the line.
“Rikiga!” Shion calls, his body moving towards him before he can even think.
“I wouldn’t do that,” says the woman behind him. He feels something cold and pointy against the back of neck.
“But he’s hurt! He’s—”
“Nothing vital. He’ll be fine, little mouse.” There’s a pause. Shion stays very still, distantly noticing how his breathing is coming raggedly and his chest feels tight. “Go to him, but behave.”
Shion doesn’t need to be told twice. He almost trips the few steps that take him to Rikiga. He kneels by his side, never letting go of the book. “Rikiga, are you—?”
“Fine, Shion.” Rikiga winces, and looks toward him. “Fucking pirates. They never get close to this route, I didn’t think—”
The woman stands in front of the defeated group and clears her throat. Shion takes a second to notice the ship that’s stationed right next to theirs, and the armed strangers that surround them. At first glance, the woman doesn’t look particularly strong or remarkable. Shion could immediately point out at least three others that look like the personified version of the evil pirates that show up in cautionary tales. But the woman projects an unmistakable air of confidence and command.
Another individual he doesn’t recognize comes up from the stairs that lead to the crew’s quarters. “Nothing there, Eve,” he says to her. “The usual.”
She nods and sheaths her sword in a clean movement.
“Well, my friends, we find each other in an uncomfortable situation. See, I never meant to hurt any of you, but seeing as you were so rude when we approached, it couldn’t be helped,” she says with ease. Now, under the light of the sun, Shion can make out her sharp features and dark blue hair. Something in the back of his mind stirs, but he’s too worried to pay attention. “As I very cordially tried to tell you before, I came here to pick up something I’ve been looking for. Now, I have to be fair to my crew and to the dedication they have put in supporting my efforts today, so they will be taking any of your belongings they find of their liking. We’ll leave you with enough provisions to last until you reach the closest port.”
Rikiga tenses by his side and Shion can hear him mutter curses under his breath. The woman—Eve, looks towards them and her mouth tilts in something that’s close, but not quite, a smile.
The minutes after that seem to stretch indefinitely. Eve orders someone from Rikiga’s crew to show two of her comrades to the cargo hold. Shion doesn’t know how long they take, but after that they make a few trips carrying provisions to the upper deck. Rikiga is almost shaking with anger by his side.
“We thank you for your collaboration,” she says after all is done, taking a graceful bow that’s way too deep to be taken as anything but an insult. “I only need one thing before we leave you to your journey.”
And then she points at him.
Of course she does.
Shion stiffens, feeling suffocated both by the sun shining above and by her keen gaze. “Little mouse, come forward.”
His legs feel numb after being in the same position for so long. He almost stumbles once he gets to his feet. Rikiga mutters something but his heart is beating so loud in his ears he fails to hear him.
He does as she asked, approaching but keeping what he thinks is a safe distance. He’s gripping the book so hard his fingers hurt.
“You seem very attached to it,” Eve says. Her voice is suddenly quiet, almost a whisper.
“It’s important to me.”
“You have studied it.”
It’s not a question. She mutters the words with unwavering certainty, but Shion nods anyway.
There’s a moment of silence, and then many things seem to happen at once. Eve grabs his arms and drags him to her side, announcing they’ll be taking Shion back to their ship. Rikiga tries to stand, shouting at her to let him go, now, and Shion tries and fails to go to him when one of the pirates unsheaths his sword in a silent thread.
“Colin, don’t,” she calls out. The pirate stills, and Rikiga manages to stand, eyes narrowed.
“Why the hell would you take him? He knows shit about sailing and it’s only going to be another mouth to feed. Just take the damn book and leave us be.”
She grips his arm a little tighter and Shion is sure that would register as painful in any other circumstance.
“Rikiga, is alright. It’s—your arm, please, Rikiga. I’ll…” he pleads, feeling his words tangle like vines as they leave his mouth.
She doesn’t let him continue. “We’re in need of another carpenter” she says, and points at Rikiga’s arm, “I can deal with that in a few minutes. If you care so much about the little mouse, come with us.”
Shion doesn’t know what he’s expecting, but Rikiga’s agreement is certainly not it. There’s defiance in his voice and Shion is both thankful and terrified for him. She gives Rikiga time to talk with his crew, and they both get a chance to pick up a few their things under the watch of one of Eve’s comrades.
Crossing the gangplank to the other ship doesn’t feel real. They’re guided below decks to the cargo hold and a woman they didn’t see before comes to treat the wound on Rikiga’s arm.
They sit silently on top of wooden crates in a poorly lit corner and Shion can feel his stomach drop when the ship starts moving. A few individuals come and go, carrying the supplies they took from Rikiga’s ship.
Only when they’re alone again, Rikiga speaks.
“Shit, Shion, I never thought we would ran into fucking pirates. They never wander into this route. Not that I know of. Here’s supposed to be safe, there’s usually patrols from port Daahl, what’s your mother gonna say—”
“You had no way of knowing,” he says, trying to sound calm “And my mom doesn’t even know I’m here, Rikiga,” he reminds him, trying not to let that thought weigh him down. Despite the four years that have gone by since he last talked to his mother, no part of him has come to accept that.
It’s the main reason behind his decision to go into this journey.
“But eventually she will. I just don’t like the idea of Karan finding out her son got kidnapped by pirates when he was under my watch.” He must see something in Shion’s face, because his voice loses some of his edge after that. “Don’t go losing hope on me now, Shion, you still have the book in your hands after all.”
Shion sighs. He’s right about that.
“Tell me if you need something for the pain. I brought a few things that can help with that,” he says.
Rikiga shakes his head. “I won’t be drinking any weird tea with shit-smelling flowers.”
That gets Shion to smile.
It feels weird, like his muscles forgot that’s something he can do.
“It’s not that bad. I can mix it with something else to help with the smell and the taste.”
“When we were young, your mother said something like that to help with a hangover and I shouldn’t have believed her,” he grumbles, squinting his eyes.
“Well, this certainly isn’t the same, and mom was still learning back then, I’m sure.”
Rikiga lets out a small chuckle. “Still learning? By then she was already the best herbalist around, stealing patients from the local physician. Wonder why she didn’t follow up on that path after.”
Shion shrugs. He doesn’t have an answer for that.
“Oi, did you bring you things to help you sleep?” Rikiga asks, inspecting the bandages on his arm.
“Azahal. Yes, it’s with all the other supplies.”
“And you have enough, right? No risk of running out?”
Shion suppresses a shiver. That’s something he has gone through before and he hopes he never has to again. “It should last. But now that we’re here—I don’t know. I hope.”
Rikiga looks like he’s about to say something else when they hear footsteps coming down the stairs. He doesn’t recognize the person that approaches; they definitely weren’t among the crew that boarded Rikiga’s ship.
“Shion,” they say, “the captain wants to see you. Bring the book,” and without another word they turn around and leave. Shion stays sitting there, frozen for a second until Rikiga pats his shoulder and mutters a quiet “Go”.
So he follows them, trying to ignore the stares he can feel on the back of his neck. The person guiding him stops in front of what can only be access to the captain’s cabin. They open the door and unceremoniously push Shion inside.
He stumbles, and immediately hears the door creaking as it closes behind him.
The room has enough space to fit a nice bed on the far end and a desk in the middle. There are windows that illuminate the room with warm sunlight, sending slanted beams of light that hit the dark wood of the floorboards.
He doesn’t let his eyes wander for long.
Eve is standing next to the desk, fingers drumming on top of it. Now that she doesn’t have a hat on and there’s no imminent threat of death to him or any other, he lets himself really see her.
And it knocks the breath out of him.
Her eyes, they’re just like—
But it can’t be.
Then, Eve’s shoulders drop slightly and she waves a hand in the air, her fingers dancing in a pattern that’s too precise to be casual. With a final flick of her wrist, her imagine shimmers like a mirage, shifting and blurring. Shion resists the urge to rub at his eyes but can’t help taking a step back.
It takes less than a second. Her hair shortens and changes to a lighter hue. Her coat and clothes stay the same, only shifting from a deep purple to a plain black with no ornaments. Her features turn a bit more pronounced; pointed jawline, high cheeks and thinner lips.
Same eyes.
They are like a storm, he had told him, over four years ago.
“You—” Shion chokes on the words, his eyes scanning his face. It’s him, there’s no doubt about it. He looks older, of course. Taller and sharper, somehow. A far cry from the boy he kept hidden in the Golden Library’s basement for weeks, back when he still could walk the streets of the Blessings freely.
“Shion—”
“How did you—? Are you…”
He halts, struggling to remember what he wanted to ask.
Nezumi, Nezumi walks around the desk and rests his arms on the back of the tall chair. Shion feels something hot and ugly bubbling up in his chest.
The ship must be veering to the east, because the sunbeams dance across the room, changing their position. One of them lands on the side of Nezumi’s neck, shining on the strands of hair that fall freely from his ponytail.
The part of Shion’s brain that got over the initial surprise thinks beautiful, and it’s really not fair, not with the hurt and the anger eating him up from the inside.
“If you want to know how I did, here’s the answer,” Nezumi says, pointing at a couple of parchments rolled on top of the table. “I’ve learned a few more tricks since we last saw each other.”
“I don’t care about your tricks!” he spits out, unable to keep his voice level. “For the Gods above, why didn’t you say anything? I thought someone was going to die—” He takes a sharp intake of breath, his heart hammering in his chest. He remembers the fear, acutely, like a sickness spreading in his veins. “And you hurt Rikiga, my friend, and Drazh, and they only got into this for me and now—”
“I did not mean them any harm,” Nezumi says firmly, and Shion thinks he sees his fingers tightening on the back of the chair. “But they retaliated, and my crew has the right—”
“Oh, shup up,” Shion cuts in. “They retaliated? You are pirates that boarded their ship! Of course they’d retaliate, in what world that wouldn’t happen?” He holds onto the book tightly with one hand and clenches the other in a fist to keep it from trembling. “What are you doing, Nezumi?”
Nezumi’s eyes scan his face quickly before dropping to his side.
“Looking for that,” he says, pointing at the book.
“That’s not what I meant.”
“I know, but that’s all you’re going to get.”
“But, really? A pirate? Nezumi—”
“I will save us both time by telling you that the judgement of a pampered kid from the Blessings has no value on my ship,” he interrupts, and Shion recognizes the steel behind his words.
It seems the years have only served to fortify it. Still, that’s not fair.
“I haven’t lived in the Blessings for a while now.”
“I know.”
He’s stunned into silence for a moment, feeling strangely cold. Like someone submerged his bones in a frozen lake.
“How?” he asks, after a few beats.
Nezumi looks down at the desk, eyes shifting briefly towards the rolled parchments. But he says nothing.
Shion feels nauseous.
“Why do you want this?” he manages to ask, lifting the book.
“Nothing of your concern, Shion.”
Shion nods. There are still words burning in his throat, but there are also tears threatening to fall from the corners of his eyes and he feels like all the anger has left him hollow and aching.
So he says nothing, only turns around and walks to the door.
“Where are you going?” Nezumi’s voice rings clear and sudden.
“To see Rikiga,” he answers, reaching for the handle. “He needs healing.”
And then he leaves.
Nezumi thankfully doesn’t try to stop him.
Shion ignores the stares he gets as he descends to the cargo hold. Rikiga is exactly where he left him and the relief is visible on his face when he sees him arrive. Shion drops down on the wooden crate next to him and only realizes there are tears streaming down his face when Rikiga calls his name worriedly and threatens to go kill Eve right that second.
Shion feels like he should explain.
So he tries, as best as he can, wiping away the angry tears and breathing deeply. It’s not a long story, at least, and Rikiga already knows the important parts. The parts about how, when he was sixteen years old and a star student at the Golden Library, he helped a stranger escape from the Crown Guards and led him to the basement. How he took care of him for almost a month, as best as he could, stealing infusions and medicine from his mother’s shop to help with his wounds. How he sneaked away to keep him company, even after he learnt why he was being pursued, knowing he could be accused of treason if anyone found out
Which was exactly what happened at the end.
Rikiga got most of that story from him the night his crew went drinking to the tavern where Shion was working near the docks, right after they somehow connected the dots and realized Rikiga knew Karan from years past.
It’s been a little over a year since that conversation, so it surprises Shion that Rikiga still remembers all the details. And he’s grateful, because it means he only needs to fill the blanks he avoided before.
Rikiga is frowning by the time he finishes.
“So… Nezumi is Eve,” he says, slowly.
Shion nods, closing his eyes.
“Well, he’s an asshole. He didn’t deserve your help back then, that much I can tell.”
A part of him wants to agree with that, but it’s a hopeless endeavour.
He doesn’t regret his decision and he knows, with strange certainty, that he never will.
There’s silence after that and Shion wonders if Nezumi will call for him again any time soon.
Idly he realizes he doesn’t even know if Nezumi doesn’t mind Rikiga knowing about his whole double identity deal, but he can’t bring himself to care.
It is then that another set of footsteps can be heard approaching from the stair. Shion looks up and finds Nezumi walking to a corner and dragging a small round table to where they sit.
“Put your arm there,” he says dryly to Rikiga, pushing then a crate to sit on.
“Why the hell would I do that?”
“Rikiga,” says Shion, with his eyes trained on the rolled piece of parchment that Nezumi is carrying, “just do it.”
Rikiga grumbles under his breath but does as Shion requests.
Nezumi places the parchment on the table and begins undoing the bandages on Rikiga’s arm.
“Does he know?” Nezumi asks, looking sideways at Shion as he finally reveals the wound.
“Yes.”
Nezumi nods, asks Rikiga to stay still and unrolls the parchment.
There are old runes written along its length. Beautiful swirls of fresh ink he doesn’t comprehend. He presses the parchment along the wound and RIkiga, to his credit, doesn’t even wince.
There’s a pause and for a moment Shion wonders if Nezumi is regretting this, if he’s just going to walk away and leave them in the cargo hold for the rest of the journey. In the candlelight, Nezumi’s skin looks oddly pale, and Shion notices how stray hairs curl on his temples where sweat has gathered.
Then, there’s humming.
Shion recognizes the melody. It’s the same he heard years ago, when Nezumi was finally strong enough to reach into his power.
The runes on the parchment low with a soft blue light. Shion hears a surprised gasp coming from Rikiga but his eyes are glued to the process.
It’s been so long. Sometimes, he thought maybe it had all been a dream.
Nezumi’s humming turns into a quiet song. The melody rises and falls like the waves they ride and as the runes shine brighter, it changes, until there’s a harmony of voices coming from only one person, a cadence of times old that lives again.
A song woven with magic.
The same magic that’s been forbidden in the Sixth Kingdom for two hundred years. The same magic that would’ve gotten Nezumi captured and executed if Shion hadn’t run into him that night.
The glowing symbols twirl and slide off the parchment, following the cadence of the tune. They disappear under Rikiga’s skin and, for a moment, there’s a glow that expands from his elbow to his fingertips, almost as if his blood was alight.
Then it dims until it becomes nothing. Nezumi pulls his hands away, slowly, and the parchment is turning black at the edges, an invisible fire burning it until it turns to ashes.
Where there was a wound, now there’s only a scar, it’s texture and color a stark difference with Rikiga’s skin in the candlelight.
“Well, shit,” Rikiga says a little breathlessly, stretching his arm and pulling it close to his face to squint at it.
Nezumi stands up and shakes the ashes from his lap, keeping his eyes down.
“Inukashi will come in a moment to show you around and give you your duties,” he says, turning around and walking to the stairs. “They’re the boatswain so follow their orders and don’t try anything stupid.”
Shion stares, swallowing down his urge to thank him, and ignoring the uneasiness that creeps up his spine.
***
When Inukashi shows up, Shion recognizes them as the person who led him to Nezumi’s quarters before. They look no older than eighteen and Rikiga sputteres indignantly, refusing to take orders from someone than young.
However, it’s not like they have much of a choice.
Elyurias is the ship’s name and most of its crew are young sorcerers or apprentices, but whatever their powers are, they keep it to themselves. A few older members are also among them, but they don’t seem to hold any special position of authority.
When Shion is asked about his knowledge on sailing he is tempted to repeat what Rikiga had said before they took them. But he bites his tongue and mentions that he can cook and knows enough about herbalism to threat a few ailments. Inukashi waves a hand dismissively. There’s a cook on board already, so he’s designated as cabin boy and there’s that.
On the third day on the ship, right before sunset, Inukashi says Nezumi wants to see him.
And he wants him to bring the book.
Shion has kept it carefully tucked away with his belongings. He didn’t have much hope for no one ever getting into his things when he wasn’t around. Trust is not a word he can use here just yet, especially because the sleeping quarters for the crew are shared spaces where there is rarely any privacy.
But until now, much to his relief, no one has touched any of his things.
So he picks it up and, for the second time since he was brought here, goes into the captain’s cabin.
Nezumi’s cabin.
The sun is already low on the sky when he steps inside and there are some candles lit around the room to keep the shadows at bay.
Nezumi is standing behind the desk, looking down at a map spread on top of it. His hair falls loose down to his shoulders, framing his face when he lifts his head as the door creaks open. He’s wearing the same long black coat, and an expression that betrays nothing.
As soon as the door closes behind him. Nezumi speaks up. “How’s your friend doing?”
He inhales.
This is going to be fine.
“Rikiga better. Thank you,” he says almost in a whisper, approaching the desk.
He knows this conversation is one they need to have, but he can’t be blamed for not looking forward to it.
Gingerly, he places the book on the desk. Nezumi’s gaze falls down to it.
In the relative silence of the room, his breathing seems too shallow and too loud. Shion feels his skin itching with uncomfortable anticipation.
“Nezumi, I—”
“Save it”, he interrupts, finally meeting his eyes. As always, they are beautiful, like the sky in a storm, but there’s also a strange shine to them that feels out of place. “Let’s make this absolutely clear and put both our cards on the table, since we’ll be working together for awhile. I am indebted to you still, we both know that. So, to even the escales, I’ll share whatever we find with you. Any secrets, any treasure or answer, any proof; it will all be split between the two of us first.” He stops and takes a breath. “We’ll both get what we want, for whatever we need, and we’ll be free to go our separate ways after that. I can take you and your friend to a safe port where you can find transport back to the Sixth Kingdom.”
Shion should feel relieved. It’s what he needs, it’s objectively the best case scenario.
It’s the closest thing he’s going to get to an apology.
But his brain is hung on a single word.
“Indebted?” he repeats, trying and failing to read Nezumi’s expression and the small smirk that starts forming on his lips at the question. “What are you talking about? You don’t—if this is what you think I was trying to get at before, you’re sorely wrong.”
“I know that,” he says, straightening slowly to move the chair and take a seat. “But it doesn’t what I just said.”
“But why… you know that’s not why I did it, right? That I wasn’t trying to get some kind of favor from you?”
And that actually makes Nezumi snort and roll his eyes. “You still understand so little, Shion. Going out to the open seas and risking your life to face the perils of a sailor’s lives might have been the best decision you have taken.”
“And you’d be one of those perils in this hypothetical life lesson?” he shoots back.
Nezumi’s smirk widens a bit.
He recognizes many things there, things he got accustomed to, for a while. The smugness, the confidence and the convictions steeled by a life of unfair trials and cruel puppeteers.
“Why, of course I am! What other role could I have but that of the antagonist force in your life? I’m certainly not a hero or a martyr,” he fakes a shudder, and Shion had almost forgotten he had a penchant for theatrics. “I’m the captain of a pirate ship, that would not suit me well at all.”
“You’re not an antagonistic force,” Shion says, taking the seat in front of the desk and placing his hand on top of the book. “You want the same thing as I do, and you’re not looking to take it from me. Moreover, you want to share it justly, right?”
“Congratulations on your listening skills, that’s exactly what I said.”
Shion ignores the first comment and sighs, letting his shoulders rest against the back of the chair.
The past four years feel like a heavy weight on his back.
“Do you have a location?” he asks, pointing at the map spread on the desk.
“If I had, I wouldn’t have gone after the book” he answers. “How much of it have you read?”
There is no point in lying and, the thing is, that despite everything, despite the fear and the hurt and aching in his chest when he thinks of the danger everyone had been in, he believes him.
He has a feeling he always will.
So he tells him what he knows.
The book, as it turns out, is a journal. An account of the only person who supposedly found one of the three Secrets of Old. The Singing Waters, the Fire’s Call and the Gifted Pearl were all said to be gifts from the gods, one of the five blessings they had bestowed upon their children long before the six kingdoms were born. Some said they were magical objects created by the powerful sorcerers of ages past, when the first pacts were made with creatures of the Fey and power in humans was still raw and new.
But the discrepancies regarding their origin didn’t matter much. They were legends, inspiration for countless storytellers to give their heroes a goal and a purpose. An example for the priestesses to describe the grace of the gods. Despite that, there were those who seeked them. Those who thought had found proof solid enough, and embarked on the path to find them
The Singing Waters to heal, the Fire’s Call to destroy and the Gifted Pearl to create. That was the simplified description. Shion had spent most of his last years at the Golden Library researching and studying the Singing Waters, not because he believed them to be real, but because there was enough evidence to think they were based on a real and powerful healing source that old civilizations had used and that had somehow gotten lost through time and war. There were enough accounts to point to that conclusion. As far as he knew, his professor back then was the most knowledgeable man in the Kingdom on the subject, but even though the Golden Library was the best place to conduct any research, they still always seemed to be one step behind, no matter how much new information was acquired.
That’s why, when Rikiga showed up with the book during a warm summer night after one of his short trips to close ports, Shion had thought nothing of it. It was a common occurrence since Rikiga had taken to bringing him back books from his journeys after finding out he used to work and study in the Golden Library.
When Shion finally got around opening the book and realized it was written in Laidoan, an old tongue spoken only in a handful of places by few individuals, his interest was immediately picked. He then discovered the Laidoan was different from the one he had studied, an archaic version of it, mixed with influences from other tongues he wasn’t so familiar with. There were coded passages too, which did nothing to deter his determination.
It took him over three months of studying and translating with the few resources he had, to figure out that what he had in his hands was an account of an individual who had found the exact location of the Singing Waters.
Then, it took a little longer for him to really believe it. From all he knew, it could be a lie, a fantasy, but it seemed too elaborate and it matched many of the things he had learned in his studies. From what he had been able to decipher, there was a first location that needed to be found that would point to the final destination. All the passages regarding that first location were particularly obscure, mixed with a heavy tint of Bressen, an old dead tongue he was not familiar with.
He had no one to tell this except for Rikiga, who had listened with an incredulous and amused expression until he realized Shion was, in fact, not messing with him. So Shion had decided to go with Rikiga on his next trip to Port Daahl, where the Scribes Archive of the third Kingdom was located. He hoped to find books on Bressen that would help him understand what he was missing.
Now, as he recounts what he has learnt from the journal and breaches the subject on Bressen, a smile curls Nezumi’s lips. He moves to rest his chin on his palm.
Shion stops mid sentence. The sun set a few minutes ago, and in the candlelight Nezumi’s eyes are similar to endless pools of turbulent water.
“What?” He asks, regaining his voice.
“I would call it fate if I didn’t know how ridiculous a notion that is and how pleased a priestess would be with that kind of statement.”
“You… that’s not really explaining anything”
“Shion,” Nezumi starts, leaning forward. The light softens some of his features and sharpens others. He lookes like a cat before jumping to catch his prey. “Sarasse kh’ilss.”
There is an eternity encapsulated in the second that follows.
A breathless moment.
It reminds him of the first time he saw Nezumi using his magic, when he was once again strong enough to reach into his power in a dark basement corner, with ink stained fingers and an ancient song spilling from his lips.
“You—is that…”
Nezumi’s smile widens. It is a real smile, dancing in his eyes.
“Bressen. I’m familiar with it.”
“You speak it?”
“No, I think no one does these days. But I can understand it in written text. It’s been a long time since I studied it, but I’ll remember enough, I’m sure.”
Shion swallows, trying to ignore the staccato of his heart.
“What did you said, earlier? Arasse…?”
“Sarasse kh’ilss. It means ‘in fortune’s wings’, a sort of parting sentence.”
Shion merely nods and his hands shake a little when he finally reacts and stands up, almost knocking the chair behind him. He flips through the pages as quickly and carefully as he can. “Here,” he says, walking around the desk to stand next to Nezumi, placing the open page in front of him. “Can you understand this?”
Nezumi’s eyes widen a fraction for a split of a second, but he quickly turns his gaze to the book.
They spend the next hour working on the first part of the cipher. Nezumi can read a few words in Bressen, but same as with the Laidoan, it’s an old version of it, and as both tongues mix and weave together in riddles neither of them can immediately make sense of.
But somehow, at the end of it, they manage to put together a phrase. It’s not even in the beginning, but still, it’s something, and Shion sees his exhilaration reflected on Nezumi’s eyes and he forgets, for a moment, what led him to this point and why he’s even set on this goal. Instead, he remembers memories long locked away, of late nights shared reading behind discarded bookshelves, of the stillness brought by the approaching footsteps of a librarian working late hours. Of a younger version of himself, leaning against Nezumi’s shoulder as he picked up the sentence right where he had left off, voice soft but unwavering.
Then the door opens and Inukashi enters the room with no preamble, walking straight towards the desk.
Nezumi leans back a little. “Inukashi, I think I’ve told you you should knock first.”
“I thought I told you I don’t care,” they say, eyebrows raising. “Why, am I interrupting something?”
“Since you asked so nicely, yes, you are,” Nezumi says, and Shion would very much like to understand the significance of the look they exchange then. He feels the sudden need to press something cold against his forehead.
“Too bad. It’s late.”
“We are—”
“It’s late, Nezumi.”
Shion is close enough to him that he can almost feel him tense by his side. And that’s—odd.
He knew Nezumi to be defensive. That’s something that obviously hasn’t changed, but the situation is still… he can see where Nezumi’s is holding his quill a little too tight, and he can also see when he drops it and pushes a rebellious strand of hair away from his eyes.
“Shion,” he says as he closes the book with care and locks it away in a drawer. “We’ll continue tomorrow.”
Shion leaves. The book is safe behind him and the key of the drawer where it is kept rests in his hand; the metal cold against his palm as he grips it firmly.
And they do continue the next day. And the day after that. It’s a slow progress, and Shion still has to tend to the duties Inukashi and other crew members have for him. But it doesn’t bother him. He likes to keep busy and it’s good to do something with his hands, the waves crashing softly against the ship and the sun high in the sky.
It’s usually late in the afternoons when he goes to Nezumi’s cabin, and they spend two to three hours finding meaning in weird passages, putting together symbols and ancient words as the temperature drops and the candles are lit.
Until Inukashi shows up and Shion leaves the room with the same key in his hand.
He wonders why Inukashi always comes at the same time. Why Nezumi’s expression closes off every without fail.
He wonders, but says nothing.
In the meantime, the crew seems to slowly be warming up to his and Rikiga’s presence. He suspects in Rikiga’s case, it’s partly because he actually knows what he’s doing, after years on the sea, and partly because he likes to drink and sing merrily and doesn’t mind placing bets on card games he’s sure to lose.
In Shion’s case, it starts with one of the younger crew members, who haltingly asks him if he knows of something he can do to help with the itching on her arms. Warily, she agrees to show him, and Shion is grateful to recognize it as a fairly common skin allergy. Not for the first time since he left with Rikiga, Shion’s glad he followed his instinct and stuffed half of his bag with all the herbs, potions and supplies he had.
So he prepares a balm for her and tells her to let him know when she needs more. A day later an older man comes to him with the same problem. He swallows his surprise and offers the same solution. After that, the navigator shows up with a stomach ache. Then, the rigger complains of a strong headache from working too many hours under an unforgiving sun. The carpenter working with Rikiga asks him for something to alleviate muscle cramps, and Rikiga himself gives in when he wakes up one day with a bad, bad hangover.
At some point, it stops being a surprise and, little by little, he learns all their names, and they learn his.
***
They’re half a day away from Fawaris, a coast city from the Second Kingdom.
In the first hour of the morning, when the sun is slowly rising from the east and bathing everything with the promising colors of a warm day, Nezumi places strips of parchment all around the perimeter of the ship. On the bow, the forecastle, the main and the quarter deck, the masts and the crow’s nests. Different crew members are tasked with holding them in place. It seems like something they’ve done before, because they move with the confidence of a practiced routine.
Still, everyone’s attention is on Nezumi when he kneels in front of a bigger piece of parchment in the middle of the main deck and starts singing.
There’s something almost ethereal about listening to him singing out in the open. He had only seen this in poor lit rooms, the song always a quiet melody crafted for a small audience. Now the rhythm reverberates on the ship, and the winds carry it to every corner, the harmonies raising like the sea.
He can see the glow in the different parchments. It brightens with the song and dims as it ends.
And then the edges of reality seem to blur. All around him, small details change. The masts shorten, the bowsprit grows, the sails change their size and color and the wood that makes Elyurias looks darker and older.
It’s a different ship.
Shion would bet the name painted on the hull has changed too.
Nezumi straightes on the center of it all as a wind picks up and scatters the ashes of the parchments used. “Welcome to the Shy Mistress, everyone”, he says, taking a bow before walking towards his quarters.
Inukashi speaks up, silencing the claps and laughter that had erupted at the mention of the name. They call those who’ll go with them to get supplies and assign tasks to those who’ll stay on the ship once they reach port.
“Good show,” Rikiga says, standing behind him.
Shion almost jumps out of his skin.
“I didn’t know something like this was possible” he admits once his heart feels a little more under control.
“Do you think he can do that to another person? Turn you into a horse, maybe?”
Shion laughs, trying and failing to imagine what kind of horse would suit him.
“Oi, Shion!” Inukashi calls, approaching them. “You can go to the town once we dock, so if you wanna look around for whatever it is you need for reading time, go ahead. And, here,” they say, as they rummage through a leather pouch and pick up a closed bag from it. Once he takes it, he realizes it’s heavy with coin. “Don’t give me that look, it’s mostly copper pieces. In case you need to replace all the plants and shit you’ve used to help all the idiots around. Just remember to be back before morning. And you,” she turns to Rikiga, who is trying to step away inconspicuously, “you’ll be coming with me, Colin and André. I need you to carry some stuff.”
Shion doesn’t need to be told twice.
As everyone goes back to their positions while the Shy Mistress continues on her path, he goes to find Elena, the cook.
“Hey, Elena?” he calls out when he finds her rummaging through open crates in the cargo hold. “Are you going? To Fawaris, I mean.”
“You bet,” she says, moving to open another crate. “It’d be nice to have some fresh vegetables even for a few days. And fruit. It’s expensive as hell over here but Nezumi won’t say shit if I make some sort of pie after he finds out.”
Shion chuckles, something warm spreading in his chest. He had shared Karan’s blueberry pie with him once. Nezumi had devoured it.
“If that’s the case and you have enough time, would you show me some shops? I’m running low on some of my supplies.”
“Sure. You wanna continue spoiling them, uh? At this rate they’ll end up going to you for every minor inconvenience,” she turns to him and blinks rapidly, inflicting a different pitch on her voice. “‘Shion, I stubbed my pinky with a table, would you kiss it better?’ Just wait, I’m telling you”.
Shion laughs and helps move a crate aside to pull another from behind a pile. “I just like helping them if I can.”
“I know. There are a couple of herbalist shops here. I can’t vouch for their quality, but I know their location. Is there anything in particular you need? Or just a bunch of herbs?”
He hesitates for a moment. “Um. Azahal. That’s… maybe harder to find.”
“It doesn’t sound familiar. What is it?”
“It’s like… like toronjil, or similar, in some aspects. But stronger. It’s native to the Sixth Kingdom and doesn’t grow well in other locations, usually,” he explains, carefully removing a bag of grain from the crate as Elena counts.
“Uh. I guess we won’t need more of that. Help me close this.”
He does and, for a moment, thinks the conversation is over.
His mistake.
“And why do you need that? The stronger thing?”
“Ah,” Shion mumbles, stalling. “It’s—I need it to sleep.”
“Is that the thing you put on that tea each night?”
“Yeah.”
“Isn’t toronjil good enough for that too though?”
“No. I mean, yeah but—not for me,” he says, resisting the urge to wring his hands. “Azahal it’s the only thing that works. It’s a condition, I guess. Sleeping problems. My father used to have it, from what I’ve heard. Mine started a couple of years ago.”
“Uh. That sucks.”
“A bit.”
“And it doesn’t have any bad effects? Like, I don’t know, making you see flying puppies or something?”
Shion smiles in spite of himself and notices that Elena is looking at him carefully. She’s more observant than he thought.
“It’s—no. It could, if prepared incorrectly. But my mom perfectioned the distillation process. I get really tired and disoriented for an hour before actually falling asleep, but that’s all. It’s the lesser evil.”
“Damn, good thing you were born in the Sixth Kingdom then.”
Shion shrugs. “I was lucky. Azahal can be hard to come by there too. You know how… well. The law’s against magic there—”
“I know. We all do.”
“Right. Ah… the authorities use azahal as a measure of protection when they—” he stops, licks his lips, “when they capture a sorcerer.” He looks sideways. Elena is looking at him with a frown. “Another of its uses is the suppression of the power in magic users. It’s the only thing that doesn’t have a bad side effect and allows them to conduct… interrogations. In a—a safe way.”
“Well. Fuck.”
Shion feels a bit sick. The interrogations are safe, yes, for everyone involved except the sorcerer being questioned.
“Yeah.”
“Does Nezumi know about this? About you having this thing, I mean.”
“No, why would—”
“I don’t know, Shion,” she sighs, and takes a seat in the crate she just closed. “I’m not a sorcerer, but my wife is. As are many around here—that’s the main reason why we stick together. Nezumi is the one with the fancier tricks, and the cleverest of us all. And if I was him, or any of the others, I’d like to know that I’m travelling with someone who regularly uses a crazy plant that could suppress my power just like that.”
“But—it’s a different preparation and—”
“Not the point, Shion.”
He looks away. “It didn’t even occur to me, Elena. I don’t… I don’t usually talk about this. It’s just—it’s for me. I would never use it on anyone here. Least of all Nezumi, he—”
He feels a hand on his shoulder. Elena is looking at him with a small smile, her eyes warm in the candlelight. “I know. I won’t tell anyone, Shion, just thought I’d mention it, you know? Now,” she straightens and ruffles his hair, “stop looking all worried. It’s not a good look on you.”
After that, it’s a bit of a long walk back up to the main deck.
He wanted to ask Nezumi something before they docked. He still wants to, but now there are spider webs of doubts clogging his lungs and his hands and feet feel like they’re made of lead.
Still, he ends up in front of the door of the captain’s cabin. It occurs to him he’s never called Nezumi “captain” and wonders if seeing his reaction is worth the try.
He inhales, exhales, knocks and waits.
No answer.
“Nezumi?” he calls, knocking again. He turns and takes a step to look around, scanning through the crew members working on the main deck to see if he spots Nezumi among them. No luck.
He bites his lip and tries the handle. It gives a soft click when he turns it. He opens the door slowly, peeking his head in as he scans the room.
The light of the morning enters through the circular windows and expands in golden halos that give everything the appearance of a dream. Maybe that’s why it takes him a second, as he steps in and closes the door behind him, to notice the figure sitting behind the desk, slumped forward.
Something coils around his heart and tugs painfully.
“Nezumi?” he calls, forcing his feet to move. He’s probably asleep.
He keeps his hand steady when he places it on his shoulder, and swallows down a sigh of relief, when he notices he’s breathing.
Then ,he sees the bottle of spilled ink on top of some papers. They’re all ruined, whatever they had, and Nezumi’s hand, still loosely holding a quill, is stained black.
Suddenly, he stirs under his touch, and Shion squeezes his shoulder softly. “Nezumi, hey, you should go to your bed if you’re this tired.”
Nezumi straightens slowly, his movements sluggish. He turns to look at Shion through bleary eyes. There’s color high on his cheeks and his skin glistens under the light with a sheen of sweat.
Only then Shion registers his breathing seems short and erratic.
“What—” Nezumi is saying, looking disoriented.
“I think you fell asleep on your desk”, Shion explains, voice heavy with worry, placing a hand on Nezumi’s forehead. He’s burning up.
Nezumi frowns slowly before turning to look at his desk. He must notice the mess immediately then, because he stands up way too quickly, forcing Shion to back up a step and knocking his chair on the process.
He curses under breath, pressing his ink stained fingers against his forehead.
“No, no, wait,” Shion hurries forward, catching his wrist and pulling his arm down. “Don’t—just… look.”
Nezumi does, as Shion quickly takes off the thin scarf he sometimes uses around his neck.
“Shion—”
“You’re sick,” he interrupts, focusing his attention on dragging the fabric across Nezumi’s forehead. The ink slides off easily, thankfully. Then he moves to clean his open palm. “Why didn’t you say anything?”
“I’m not sick, Shion.”
“Bullshit.”
His voice sounds rough. Quiet in the golden light of the morning. Shion cleans his fingers, one by one. On his peripheral vision, he notices Nezumi swaying momentarily in front of him. He almost drops what he’s doing to steady him, but before that, Nezumi leans forward, pressing his forehead on Shion’s shoulder.
He can feel his breathing on his neck. At least it feels a little more regular now.
“I’m just tired. The spell. It takes a toll.”
Shion stands very still. He hasn’t let go of Nezumi’s hand.
“You are too warm, Nezumi. This is not just tiredness.”
An exhale against his neck. The coil around his heart is still there again, tugging painfully.
“Living people are warm,” he says.
And Shion wants to laugh, wants to push him away, wants to hold him closer.
He does none of those things.
***
He doesn’t find azahal in Fawaris, but he wasn’t really holding onto any hope for that. Thanks to Elena, he does find one good herbalist shop and buys more than enough to have supplies that will last for a while.
He also finds a book on Bressen, which is what he was going to ask Nezumi about, but instead ends up using his efforts to convince him to drink some water and go to bed.
They leave the port the next day, and that afternoon he feels trepidation crawling up his spine when he knocks on Nezumi’s door.
Nezumi does appear to be okay. He even humours Shion and lets him press his hand against his forehead, smirking up at him the whole time. Shion ignores the way his heart jumps and pushes the memory of Nezumi leaning against him behind a smile.
“It was really tiring then,” he says, giving him the key so he can open the drawer where the journal is kept.
“Magic is complicated. I didn’t tell you everything about it back then,” he says as the lock clicks open.
“I thought you had. I asked you plenty of questions.”
“Yes, but I didn’t trust you enough to tell you everything.”
Shion pauses. Nezumi is opening the book in front of them.
“I thought you had.”
“Had what?”
“Trusted me.”
Nezumi meets his eyes for a beat.
Shion gaze doesn’t waver.
“You were naive.”
Shion shrugs. “Perhaps,” he concedes, and decides this is as good a time as any. “I got something that might be helpful.”
He picks the bag with the book and takes it out, handing it over to Nezumi.
“A book?”
“On Bressen”
The reaction is immediate. He picks it and flips it open in one motion, going through the first pages and then skipping right to the middle.
“Fawaris?”
“Yes. I thought it might help us with—”
“Perfect,” Nezumi cuts in, and when he looks up his smile is bright and open and Shion feels a bit unsteady on his feet. “Look, there’s a list of the declensions, even the ones that got merged with the years.”
Shion walks around the desk and moves a stool to sit at Nezumi’s side. He reads the first sentences and something catches his eye. “Isn’t this the one that keeps showing up? Here…“ he points, pulling the journal so it’s side to side with the book. “It’s the same. Here too.”
Nezumi laughs at his side and the light of the sunset catches on his hair.
He looks lovely.
Shion forces himself to look away.
“I think we might figure this out,” Nezumi says, pulling a blank parchment open and picking up a quill.
Shion’s voice is barely above a whisper.
“I think so too.”
Two hours later the night finds them with all they need, all the words and sentences connected. The cipher is no longer a mystery.
Still, it doesn’t make sense.
Nezumi paces the room with a parchment in his hands, reading it under his breath over and over again. Shion stands leaning against the desk, just watching him.
“Maybe we got something wrong,” Nezumi says.
“No,” Shion replies. “We checked. It’s all… it’s all there.” He rubs his eyes, thinking, trying to think. It feels like there’s something just at his fingertips, always sliding away at the last possible second.
“But it doesn’t… what is this supposed to mean?”
“Maybe that’s the whole point. Something meaningless, or something that only the author could understand.”
Nezumi stops pacing and just looks at him. In the silence, the sound of the parchment crinkling under his grip feels too loud. “Where’s your optimism now, Shion? Because we could use some of that now. Maybe it would work a miracle for us, who knows, might be worth the try.”
Shion walks up to him. “You’re being unfair.”
“Am I? And you get to decide that?”
“Yes,” he remarks, taking the parchment off Nezumi’s hand, thankful when he doesn’t resist and just lets it go. “Have you cast any spells today?”
Nezumi looks momentarily thrown aback.
“What?”
“Spells. Maybe you’re tired,” Shion says as he turns and goes back to lean against the desk. “Because of magic and all of that.”
“I didn’t know you could be sarcasting.”
“Yes, well, maybe you’re rubbing off on me.”
“But it doesn’t suit you.”
Shion, for once, decides to ignore him. Nezumi is very much like a temperamental cat when he’s in a mood. “Maybe we’re looking at this from the wrong perspective,” he says, frowning.
“How so?”
“It says, ‘in the Siris, find the sky above the tallest grass’. We know the Siris was a temple.”
“A temple that’s probably been underwater for a long time.”
“Do you know…?” he bites his lip, thinking, trying to remember, trying to keep reaching. “Laidoans. What was their religion like?”
“Uh,” Nezumi walks towards him, frowning. “They—I think their pantheon looked a lot like… a mix from Fey and the Gods of the Blessing.”
“They adored the Fey?” Shion questions, looking up at Nezumi.
“Yes. From what I know. Many of their high priests were sorcerers who had pacts with powerful creatures from beyond.”
In his mind, something clicks.
Shion looks back down at the parchment so sharply he’s sure his neck might hurt the next day.
“Temples to the Fey, Nezumi, they were different.”
Something in Nezumi’s expression clears.
His eyes widen a fraction
“Towers,” he says. “The Laidoans loved towers, we know their cities were full of them—”
“And their temples were no different.” Shion cuts in, excitement growing until he almost feels his hands shake.
“Shion,” Nezumi adds, and he’s smiling again, his eyes alight. “Gardens, the word in Laidoan for temple is alk’naan and it means garden.”
“So ‘the tallest grass—’”
“The tallest tower in the Siris,” he completes. “It’s a poor excuse of a metaphor, but it makes sense”
Shion can hear his heartbeat loud in his ears. He’s still holding the parchment in his hands and Nezumi is standing right in front of him, the storm in his eyes holding so much it threatens to spill and drown him.
“It must be,” he answers in a whisper, breathing out shakily.
Nezumi’s smile changes suddenly and he leans in, crowding Shion against the desk.
“You look distracted.”
Shion holds the parchment against his chest. He feels his cheeks heat and wonders how much can Nezumi notice in the candlelight.
“I am.”
Nezumi moves his hand, slowly, and threads his fingers in Shion’s hair. He closes his eyes and remembers. Nezumi did the same thing the night before he had to run away. Carded his fingers through Shion’s hair while he was reading until he fell asleep with his head on his lap. That’s how they found them, right before the escape.
When Nezumi speaks again, his voice is soft but clear.
“At least, this means we’re not going to where Siris is located for nothing.”
Shion decides not to say anything, lest the multitude of words in throat choke him. After a few seconds, Nezumi steps back, straightening.
“When will we get there?” he asks finally, thankful his voice is even.
“Three days. Possible four. Gives us time enough to prepare.”
***
André and Val are the best swimmers in the crew, according to Inukashi, so it’s lucky that they volunteer to dive to the ruins with them. They shed the clothes that would only weigh them down and Shion resents the chill of the morning wind as it hits his naked back when they gather at the bow of the ship. Nezumi is the only one who looks mostly the same. Only his boots and coat are gone.
Before he can say anything, Karina, Elena’s wife, appears with Inukashi at her side and casts a spell on the four of them to allow them to breathe underwater.
A minute later, they jump overboard.
Shion panics each time he inhales and doesn’t choke on the water. He does his best to focus on following Nezumi and the others, forcing his heart to slow down.
Luckily, the temple is not too deep under the sea. The waters here are shallow and clear, and the light that filters through still reaches the seafloor and the space around it.
They spot the ruins easily.
At a distance, it looks like a mass of darkened stones covered in different forms of sea life. They circle the top of the ruins once and just then Nezumi, with a gesture, instructs their companions to spread out and around, keeping a perimeter around the tallest tower. He dives towards it and Shion follows.
The topmost chamber is wider than Shion imagined it would be. Wide arches where windows or stained glass were probably placed make for an easy entrance. Immediately, Nezumi points up. The vaulted ceiling is still intact.
Almost at the same time, they start swimming towards it. It doesn’t take to spot what they’re looking for.
Carved on the stone in the center of the ceiling is a strange array of symbols and lines. Some of them connect with the others, some don’t. Shion looks at Nezumi with a question on his lips.
Nezumi smiles at him and gestures to Shion to wait awhile. He nods and moves back a little, keeping an eye on their surroundings until Nezumi turns around and nods once. Together, they push themselves out of the chamber through the arched windows, where they wait for the others to see them.
And just like that, it’s done.
He’s almost certain that when he saw Nezumi’s expression upon finding the carvins, ther was recognition in his eyes.
He grins and kicks his legs to push himself forward when he sees the others quickly swimming ahead.
But then—
Paint shots up his right leg, as something cold and sharps digs and pulls. A silent scream leaves his lips; just bubbles in the water.
He turns wildly, trying to kick whatever has got a hold of him. He manages to make contact with something solid and for a moment, he’s free. In that split of second he manages to see the shape of a reptilian creature, a blur of dark green scales, elongated limbs and sharp claws.
It’s fast. And Shion isn’t a particularly good swimmer.
This certainty grips him with fear and he barely moves out of the way in time when the creature slashes at him with his claws. Pain blooms in his chests and he kicks, trying to swim upward as he’s grabbed and pulled down again.
He tries to look in the direction where Nezumi and the others should be, but everything is spinning and he can’t distinguish up from down any longer.
Somehow, he manages to break free once more, turning so the creature is not at his back this time.. He has a split second to regret that decision, seeing with stark clarity the instant the creature curls back to strike at him with its longest claw pointed not to slash or grab, but to pierce.
He won’t make it.
However, the pain never comes. A shadow falls between him and the creature and the blow pushes them both back.
Shion struggles to remain upright and out of the corner of his eye he sees the light reflecting on a blade that gleams right before going into the neck of the reptilian monster.
His heart catches up with what he’s seeing before his brain does, seizing painfully in his chest.
Nezumi.
He’s holding onto the creature as he continues to push his sword in, twisting it as a dark substance darkens the water around the wound. The creature trashes, mouth opening to reveal sharp, curved teeth that aim to sink into Nezumi’s shoulder. But he’s quick to dodge, and suddenly there’s Colin, holding the creature from behind and sinking a knife into his side.
It probably lasts only a couple of seconds, but it seems like hours go by before the creature stops moving and they let it go. It sinks down to the ocean floor, it’s mouth still frozen in a silent scream.
Nezumi turns to him and Shion feels a flood of relief so overwhelming it threatens to drown him very much like the sea should, if there wasn’t magic bending the rules of the universe for him.
They swim up to the surface, and as soon as they break it Nezumi calls out.
“Shion is hurt! Ropes, quick!”
It doesn’t take long before the four of them are back on the main deck, breathing hard and surrounded by worried eyes and a very upset Inukashi.
Rikiga is at Shion’s side, hovering over Karina, who’s inspecting his wound.
“What do you mean an Arkraa? What would one of those be doing so far from his colony?” Inukashi is asking to whoever might be brave enough to answer.
Much to her indignation, Nezumi ignores her and turns to look down at Shion, leaning against the main mast with his clothes still dripping salt water.
“How bad is it?” he asks, his voice sounding raw and dry. Shion immediately tries to find his eyes. “Does it need healing?”
“No, I don’t think that’d be needed,” Karina says. “It’s not a deep cut, and this one here looks worse than it really is.”
“Like hell it does!” Rikiga protests. “It’s all red and swollen—”
“I’m fine, Rikiga,” Shion cuts in, hating how raspy and strange his voice sounds. He looks at Nezumi, finding his gaze at last. “I’m fine.”
“Good,” he says. “Good.”
Then he staggers, and falls down.
***
When Inukashi lets him in, Shion feels cold to his bones. He distantly remembers Elena convincing him to get out of his damp clothes and Rikiga throwing an extra coat on his shoulders when he kept shivering.
“What—” he licks his lips. His throat feels dry. “How is he?”
Inukashi leads him to the side of the bed with a tight expression on their face. They look as tired as Shion feels.
“Look for yourself,” they say.
Shion does.
His surprise renders him silent for a minute.
Nezumi lays on his bed, forehead damp with sweat and a tight expression on his face. He’s shirtless and there’s a bandage around his torso, covering the place the Arkraa’s claw pierced through. And all around it, Shion sees a spider web of white scars, shaped in lighting-like patterns. The marks stretch outwardly, expanding to his navel and wrapping around his sides, reaching up to his chest until they almost curl around his shoulders.
There’s a soft knock on the door that startles him out of his reverie.
Karina steps in, holding a basin full of water and clean strips of fabric. When she approaches, Shion has half a mind to step aside and help her move a stool next to Nezumi’s bed.
“Inukashi,” he starts, as he sees Karina clean Nezumi’s forehead and check his bandages. “What is that? What’s… what’s happening?”
Inukashi sighs and drags a hand down their face. “He didn’t want you to know.”
“But—”
“I don’t give a shit about that now. But I’m gonna sit first,” they say, going to the desk in the center of the room and flopping down on the chair.
Shion follows, reluctantly, his eyes going back to Nezumi’s still form every few seconds.
“I’ll keep this short because this idiot,” Inukashi says, waving a hand in Nezumi’s direction, “should be the one answering all your questions, not me. Look, the Singing Waters is not the first of the three Secrets that Nezumi tries to find. First, it was the Fire’s Call. And guess what? He found it. A few months ago. He went in alone and came back with those white scars forming right around here,” they explain, placing a finger a few inches above their navel. “And it would be fine if they were just scars, but they kept spreading and he kept getting weaker.”
Karina walks up to them, looking back at Nezumi over her shoulder.
“From what I’ve been able to gather,” she says, “there’s something about whatever it was the Fire’s Call did to him that makes his power react… badly. Think of it as some kind of poison, the magic in him sees it as dangerous, directly opposed to it, so it tries to destroy it. The problem, the poison has already seeped in too deep.”
“As a result,” Inukashi continues, “his power is burning him up from the inside.”
Shion looks at them both. He heard them, but the words keep repeating themselves in his mind, over and over, and he can’t bring himself to understand. He doesn’t want to take that truth in his hands and hold it.
He feels it might burn him too.
Fire’s Call, he thinks. Destruction.
A realization downs on him. “That’s why you came, each night,” he says.
“Yeah,” Inukashi concedes, sighing. “I checked to see how much the scars were spreading, since I didn’t trust him to tell me the truth if I asked.”
“What happens when—” Shions starts. Clears his throat. “What happens when he uses his magic? Or when he gets hurt?”
“We think it accelerates the process,” Karina says. “Under normal circumstances the power of a sorcerer wouldn’t react instinctively if they’re wounded. Magic diminishes to preserve itself if the user it’s too weak. But this poison forces it to react violently, and when magic it’s used, the poison reacts back, starting a chain effect.”
Shion is thankful the empty chair is close by. He grabs the back of it, gripping until his hand hurts.
“When we went to Fawaris… he—?”
“Looked like death warmed over afterwards?” Inukashi interrupts. “Yeah, that’s why. I told him not to waste energy in such a big fucking spell. We had enough supplies still, with what we took from Rkiga’s ship and some rationing, we could’ve managed. Do you think he listened?”
Shion remembers the fear he felt when they caught him, after he helped Nezumi escape. Remembers the dread that settled in his stomach when they read his sentence after the trial, casting him out of the Blessings and prohibiting any contact with his mother and anyone from his life. Remembers the distress running in his veins when he saw Rikiga hurt on the deck of his ship.
All of it feels like nothing compared to what he’s feeling now.
Still, he forces himself to speak.
“So now, until he heals, the chain reaction wont stop.”
Karina nods. Inukashi looks away, their lips tightly shut.
“Is no one else on board able to heal him?”
“We don’t know what will happen if we add someone else’s power into the mix. It’s not… it’s not worth the risk”, she says, sighing. “I’ve been thinking of a way to suppress his power; it wouldn’t make any difference in the long run, but in situations like this, it’d give us enough time for his body to find some balance and for me to accelerate his natural healing with a spell—”
“What,” Shion interrupts, hearing his voice distantly, like he’s in a dream. “what did you—suppress his power? That would help?”
Inukashi and Karina exchange a glance.
Shion feels his heart in his throat.
“Well—”
“Karina,” he says, his voice sounding alien and distant. “I can do that. I have—there’s something I can prepare. Would that help?”
***
It takes both Inukashi and Rikiga’s insistence to get him to leave Nezumi’s side. Elena half threatens him to get him to eat something and Karina watches him like she expects him to collapse at any second.
But, weirdly enough, he doesn’t feel tired. Or hungry, or sleepy or… anything.
Once he had picked up the azahal from his supplies and started preparing the tincture needed, a strange numbness had taken over him. It brought him an alien sense of calm, a quiet settling in like the sea before a storm.
He wasn’t sure how long it was going to last.
Inukashi is the one who finds him later, and they don’t need to say anything because it’s all too clear in their tired smile.
Shion rushes back to the cabin, breathless before taking the first step, and doesn’t bother knocking before steeping in.
Nezumi is sitting up on his bed, head tilted back and lips pursed in something close to a pout. His eyes, trained on the wooden beams of the ceiling, turn immediately to Shion when he hears the door opening.
“Shion—”
The calm dissipates like seafoam on the sand. He feels frayed at the edges, about to burst with something that chokes him as he tries to speak.
“You—you idiot,” he says, approaching the bed as he lets the door slam shut behind him. “Why didn’t you say anything?! I was—I thought you were going to die, Nezumi.”
And he must notice the irony of hearing those words, so similar to what he said to him right after he dropped the visage of Eve in this same room.
But thankfully, he says nothing. He only looks at Shion with clear and focused eyes.
An incoming storm.
“This is why you want the Singing Waters. You need them.”
“Yes. I do.”
It surprises Shion a little, how clear his voice sounds. How certain.
There’s also the fact that he wasn’t really expecting an answer.
“You could’ve told me,” he starts again, trying to bite down on the hurt that breaks his voice at the end. “Everyone in your crew knows. And I’m not—you don’t have to trust me, Nezumi, but I would’ve understood, I would’ve helped—”
“You did help,” Nezumi interjects. “We found the location. I already gave Inukashi the course to follow.”
“That’s not what I meant.”
“I know.”
“Then why—”
“Because of this,” he explains, waving a hand in his general direction, leaning back to stare at the ceiling once more. “Because I knew you’d get like this. Worried. Distracted.”
“You didn’t tell me because I care? For the Gods above, Nezumi, if that worries you so much, you should’ve never brought me along in the first place.”
Nezumi says nothing to that. He sees him gripping the sheets by his sides in tight fists, his jaw set firmly.
Shion waits in the silence, feeling the anger seep out of him in slow waves, all the tiredness kept at bay for hours coming to replace it.
He rubs his eyes and looks at the window. The sun is setting in the horizon and the sound of waves sets a calming rhythm that his heart aches to follow.
“Thank you,” he says at last. “For saving my life. That creature… I wasn’t fast enough, and I thought—” He shakes his head. It doesn’t matter now. “But don’t do anything like that again. I know you think there’s this… debt between us, but you can’t take that risk just to balance the scales, or whatever idea of it you have in your mind, Nezumi. Just—I don’t care. Forget it ever happened. I’m sure you would’ve found a way to survive an escape on your own anyway. You were stronger than me even then—”
Nezumi’s eyes snap to him and Shion’s words die in his mouth.
“You don’t know what you’re saying,” he says, supporting himself with his hands to sit straight. Shion resists the urge to reach out to him and help. “I would’ve never survived that day if you hadn’t found me. I would’ve been lost, in more ways than one, if we hadn’t crossed paths. This was… this was never about a debt, Shion. I’m not trying to repay you because I know that no matter what I do, it would never be enough. But I can’t stand aside while you’re getting hurt, I can’t, I’ve done it long enough. Don’t ask that of me.”
Shion can feel his heartbeat in her fingertips, in his ears, in the tremor of his breathing.
It is almost funny, he thinks, that it took for both of them to see the eyes of death for their walls to finally crumble completely.
“I’m allowed to hope,” he says, finally, thanking the heavens his voice doesn’t shake.
Nezumi turns his face away and closes his eyes.
“I hate this,” he mutters.
“What?”
There’s a beat of silence before the quiet answer: “Caring.”
Shion needs to sit down. He settles for clearing his throat instead. “It can be quite uncomfortable at times.”
“Do you think one can give it back, somehow?” Nezumi asks.
“No. I’ve been told it’s not exactly a fair deal.”
And at that, and last, Nezumi smiles for a second. “Do you think they’ll accept it?”
“Accept what?”
“The Singing Waters. In exchange for your old status.”
Shion tries and fails to form the same question at least twice.
“How do you—?”
“A deduction. It wasn’t hard to guess, Shion.”
He gives in and takes a step closer to the bed, sitting at the end of it. Nezumi glances at him briefly.
“I don’t care about… ‘my status’, as you call it. There are things that I miss about it, yes, but I’m not looking to get my life at the Blessings back. I just—” he sighs, looking down at his hands. “I haven’t seen or talked to my mom in four years, Nezumi. And just as I’m not allowed to enter any of the districts save for the Pious Ward, she’s not allowed to leave the Blessings because of me. I know she lives comfortably there, and she has her shop and her clients, but I’m… I’m selfish. I want to see her, to know that she’s alright. And I want her to know that I am too, because she used to worry so much back then, and now I can’t imagine—”
“Good thing we have a destination, then,” Nezumi says, and when Shion turns to look at him, his gaze is already on him. Piercing and intent.
Something about setting the course rings in his mind.
“You—I thought… ”
“The carvings on the ceiling were old runes. The Fey used it to mark a group of islands they considered sacred. I know where to go, and we’re not that far away.”
He stares. “Are you sure?”
“Yes,” Nezumi reaches out and Shion, without thinking, reaches back and takes his hand. “We’ll find it. You’ll take it back to them and you’ll see your mother again. And then you’re going to give me some of that pie that she makes, the one you brought to me back then.”
Shion laughs, and there are tears in his eyes, but Nezumi doesn’t mention it.
“Okay,” he says. “okay.”
***
It shouldn’t be surprising that their final destination is in a cave on an island in the middle of an archipelago called Sailor’s Graveyard. They anchor the Elyurias out of the reef range and use two smaller boats that are easy to maneuver around the treacherous rock formations of the outer ring.
It takes two long hours before they finally reach a spot safe enough to leave the boats and easy for them to approach. The island vegetation is lush and vibrant, seemingly untouched by human life. They marvel at its beauty, but only until the heat starts to make the air feel stifling and the humidity makes their clothes cling uncomfortably to their skins.
Rikiga, who refused to let Shion go without him, helps clear the path of vines and long branches that make it impossible to move easily. Still, it takes them another hour before they find the cave.
Inukashi, Rikiga and André, reluctantly agree to wait at the entrance, and Shion and Nezumi slowly descend.
The air inside the cave is pleasantly cool. Shion sighs in relief as Nezumi walks a few steps ahead of him, sword in hand..
“Do you think this will be dangerous, too?” He asks, making sure for the twentieth time that he’s carrying the bag with the two bottles they’ll most likely need.
“I doubt it. The Fire’s Call is about destruction, I should’ve expected it,” Nezumi answers, stopping for a second before they take a turn. “The Singing Waters are the opposite but… I guess we can only wait and see.”
It takes a couple of minutes for Shion no notice that something’s off. At first, he can’t pinpoint exactly what, but as they keep moving forward, the feeling persists.
And then it dawns on him.
Caves are supposed to be dark. But neither of them has had the need to lit a torch. And even though it’s dim, there is a light that’s enough for his eyes to see everything around.
Finally, he looks up.
“Nezumi?” he calls softly.
“What is it?”
“Look,” he says, pointing.
Along the curved cavernous ceiling, there’s a thin series of cracks that emanate a soft glow. And they continue, expanding towards the direction they’re taking.
“That’s a sign if we needed any,” Nezumi says, fingers tapping on the hilt of his sword.
“There’s writing here, I think.”
And there is. Along a ridge on the rock, a series of symbols are carved.
The glow comes from them too.
“Those are Fey in origin.”
“Can you understand their meaning?”
“Possibly. These are similar to what I use for my spelles.” He moves closer to where Shion is and, in silence, inspects the symbols for a moment. “It’s… something about humility. And patience.”
“Nothing about the Singing Waters?”
“No, not that I can see.”
So they move on, and it’s less than a minute before the tunnels open up to a wider chamber.
Without saying a word, they stop at the entrance. There’s a soft melody that echoes in the space, a sound like rushing water and shining stars and winds blowing against open sails. The glowing cracks that line the top of the tunnel expand and multiply in the chamber, forming an array of lines that stretch from the entrance to cover all sides of the cavern walls and converge on the opposite point, where a thin stream of water emerges from a fissure on the rock, hitting the side of a concave platform and then running down to disappear in a crevice on the floor.
It seems so simple, for something with so much significance. Even so, Shion feels his breath catching. It feels sacred. Unique.
Nezumi clears his throat at his side and Shion looks at him. He seems to shake himself briefly, and he wonders if maybe whatever presence is instilled in these walls is affecting him too.
“Shall we?” Nezumi asks, and takes the first step forward.
Shion follows him in. They walk the twenty feet that are between them and the small stream. The melody is all encompassing now, still soft, still quiet, but surrounding them fully. It feels weird to speak.
“Should I…?” Shion asks in a whisper, looking at the glowing lines all around them.
“Yes. It’s… better not to linger too long.”
“Right,” he mutters, fumbling for the first bottle. He holds it with trembling hands and gets closer to the crevice where the water comes from. He glances at Nezumi over his shoulder.
He stands close behind, his hand tight around the hilt of his sword, shoulders tense. “Go ahead. I’m right here.”
He places the mouth of the bottle under the stream, and watches with fascination as it trickles down and slowly starts to fill it.
“There’s an inscription here,” Nezumi says in a whisper, and Shion can hear him taking a few steps back “On the top. Just like the runes before. It’s—it’s in Laidoan”
“What does it say?”
There’s a brief pause.
“Uh… roughly, something like ‘a gift in a hundred turns around a star’”
Shion hums quietly, seeing how finally the water reaches the brim. He straightens and turns to look at Nezumi, quickly picking the cork from the bag to close the bottle.
“It sounds like a proverb, an adage of sorts,” he says, finally looking up to find Nezumi staring at him with wide eyes.
“Shion—”
“Nezumi, what’s—”
“Shion, the water, it’s…”
He turns. The stream has been reduced to a slow trickle. Small droplets that fall silently on the rock.
Until it stops.
Shion breathing stops too, but it’s quickly trampled with confusion.
“Did you do something?” Nezumi asks.
“What—No, of course not, I only… it was fine, just seconds ago, I didn’t…”
Nezumi’s expression falters. Shion feels his chest constrict as a panic settles in.
No. No, no, no, no. This can’t be. This can’t be.
His mind races to find an answer, an explanation, anything—
But then he hears Nezumi’s soft laughter. It’s a broken thing, a melody from a forgotten instrument.
Almost painful.
“Nezumi?”
“Oh, the Gods are cruel”, he mutters, head hanging low. His hand flexes around the handle of his sword, shaking it idly from side to side. “Of course it wouldn’t be that easy, what were we thinking?”
“I’m not… Nezumi, I don’t understand.”
Nezumi finally looks up. His eyes are dull and his expression forms an imperfect smiling mask.
But upon looking back at Shion’s face, something breaks. The mask falls, slowly, easily, leaving only an odd blend of anger and resignation. He shakes his head and waves his empty hand at the inscription.
“Humility and patience, the runes from before. And now this, ‘a gift in a hundred turns around a star’. What a load of bullshit,” he spats, and realization starts to dawn on Shion. “One time in a hundred years. One chance, one dose. I bet there’s a shitty life lesson they intended to impart from this.”
And it makes sense.
He hates that it makes sense.
He’s frozen on the spot, still holding the bottle with the Singing Waters in his hands. It’s just then he notices the melody around them has stopped.
Nezumi curses under his breath, turns around and starts walking away.
“Where are you going?” Shion asks, still unmoving.
“What do you mean? We’re getting out of here. There’s nothing left.”
“But—”
“Don’t—” he bites out, turning sharply to look at him. “Don’t do this, Shion. There’s nothing else. Let’s leave.”
He doesn’t want to give in.
But he forces himself to take a step anyway, and then another, and he follows Nezumi out of the chamber and back into the tunnel.
As they walk, the lights on the cracks at the top start to dim.
Shion wants to scream, he doesn’t want any more signs, does need more. It’s enough hurt and enough injustice to bear.
Nezumi’s voice cuts loudly through the silence.
“We have enough supplies to make a journey straight to the Sixth Kingdom. Without detours and changing Elyurias appearance to use trade routes, we should be there in less than three weeks.”
“What are you talking about?”
“You need to go back to your life, and to your mother, and I need to repay some favours. My crew—”
“Wait. Wait.” He stops. A few steps ahead, Nezumi stops too. “This is not… I’m not taking this,” he says, lifting the bottle. The soft light from the cracks above makes its surface shine. “Nezumi, you need this.”
“You need it too.”
“You can’t compare that. You can’t,” he says, walking up to him until they’re right in front of each other. “Don’t ask me to stand aside and watch you get hurt, you said that, to me. The least you could do it’s to return the favor.” He pushes the bottle against Nezumi’s chest, holding it there. “I won’t take this. I won’t, not if it’s the only thing that can keep you alive.”
Nezumi looks from his eyes down to the bottle. He can feel the rise and fall of his chest as he breaths.
“You’re so stubborn,” he says then. “You have a life to go back to, Shion. I’m a sorcerer and a pirate—in most places, my existence is a crime. But you… you could do so much. And this—” he stops, placing a hang above Shion’s, where’s he holding the bottle against his chest. “This is a possibility you deserve.”
“You’re not listening,” Shion says firmly. “I won’t take this. Not if by the end it means I’ll never get to see you again, even if it’s by chance. That’s the only possibility I want to keep.” He takes Nezumi’s other hand and, when he doesn’t resist, places it under the base of the bottle. He leans in, resting their foreheads together. “If you don’t take it, I’ll just drop it all on the sea at the first chance I get. I bet that will make some fish really happy.”
Nezumi huffs a weak laugh. “You’re an idiot, Shion.”
“Yeah, I’ve been told.”
“Are you sure about this?”
“Yes. Are you?”
“No. But it’s not like you’re giving me much of a choice.”
At that, it’s his turn to smile.
**
Back in the ship, after toasting to his enemies and downing the Singing Waters in one go, Nezumi falls asleep.
At first, Shion panics. He and Inukashi rushe to steady him as he sways in place, the memory of him collapsing after the attack in the underwater temple still fresh for them both. But as the minutes go by and Karina inspects him, it seems he only has fallen to a deep slumber.
They check his white web of scars and, slowly, they seem to be retracting and fading.
This time around, Inukashi doesn’t try to pry him from his side. They bring him food and keep him company at times insead.
Twelve hours later, Nezumi opens his eyes.
“Nezumi,” he asks, quietly, as if his voice could somehow affect whatever outcome they will get. “How do you feel?”
Nezumi looks at him and reaches out a hand. Shion catches it immediately. “Cold,” he answers, sitting up without letting go. “How long—?”
“Half a day,” he says, looking down at their hands. He moves his fingers gingerly until he can place them on Nezumi’s pulse. His heart beats steadily. “The scars from Fire’s Call have been fading.”
Nezumi merely nods before leaning forward until his forehead rests on Shion’s shoulder. He exhales, slowly, and says nothing for a long time.
Shion’s throat feels tight.
“I’m still here,” Nezumi mutters, finally. Shion squeezes his hand once and turns just enough to kiss the crown of his head. His hair is silky under his lips.
“You are.”
“You’re still here, too.”
Shion smiles. “Yes.”
“Tell Inukashi I resign. They can be the captain now. I want to rest for the rest of this journey.”
Shion chuckles. His eyes are starting to sting.
“They’ll hate you if you do that.”
“Mmm.”
“What about… you power, Nezumi, do you still—?”
“Yes,” he says quietly, still leaning against Shion. “It’s with me still. It’s—it really worked, Shion. It really did.”
“I know.”
“But—Shion. Your life, and your mother—”
He squeezes his hand and raises it up to his lips to place a soft kiss on his knuckles.
Nezumi stays very still.
“We’ll find another way. I’m sure we will.”
After that, for a long time, neither of them moves.
***
They’re less than a week away from the Sixth Kingdom.
The journey back has been blissfully uneventful. Shion has devoted more of his time to help Elena in her duties, and is helping her with the inventory in the cargo hold when a sound of footsteps descending down the stairs startles them both.
The surprise only increases when they see Nezumi coming towards them, holding a… a flower? And Inukashi following close behind.
“Shion!” Nezumi calls, and his eyes seem to be lit from the inside. It’s the same look he had when they broke the cipher in the journal in what seems ages ago. “Look.”
And he holds the flower.
The flower in question is, well, it’s a pretty flower. Big, with wide purple petals, vibrant even the dim light of the room.
“Uh,” he says, confused, looking at Inukashi and Karina in turns. “Thank you?”
Nezumi laughs a bit… hysterically, and for a second Shion thinks ‘oh, he’s lost it, the cure was fake’.
“Shion, please, if I wanted to give you flowers you’d get a bouquet, with asters for your name. No, listen, this is—Inukashi, why don’t you tell them?”
“Because you won’t shup up! Gods above, you do love listening to the sound of your voice, don’t you?���
Shion still hasn’t recovered from the word bouquet when Inukashi starts telling their story.
“Listen, while I was waiting with the others outside of that creepy cave I decided to wander for a bit, alright? Because I was getting bored and thinking way too much for my liking. So I follow this path around the creepy thing for a while and then I see this patch of beautiful wildflowers, and it seems fair to keep at least one, as a memory, because this stuff is supposed to be legendary and maybe it’ll cheer me up if I get to be old and cranky, so—”
“It’s been two weeks Shion,” Nezumi interrupts, handing the flower over to him. “Just look at it.”
“Didn’t you find it weird?” Karina asks Inukashi, her eyes on the soft looking petals.
“Why would I? I mean, some plants are weird as hell, right? I didn’t really pay it any mind until Nezumi saw it minutes ago and started asking questions.”
“There’s a difference between weird and unnatural, Inukashi,” Nezumi says.
“I’m no expert, alright?”
Shion listens to them distantly, staring at the flower in his hands. It looks freshly cut, overflowing with life still.
“Nezumi, do you think—?” he asks, not daring to finish the sentence. Not daring to hope.
There’s finally a moment of silence.
“I don’t know, Shion. But if it’s like this because of its proximity to the Singing Waters source, then it’s worth a try. Can you do it?”
The distillation process his mother taught him years ago, the one he’s been using infallibly since then, repeats itself in low whisper in his mind, over and over again.
“Yes,” he says finally. “Yes, I can.” He looks up. Karina is smiling at him and Inukashi ‘oohs’ in surprise.
And Nezumi—
Nezumi looks happy. His eyes alight with warmth and something else that Shion doesn’t dare to name.
***
The request for an audience with his former professor in the Blessings takes three days to be processed. It’s just enough time for Shion’s nerves to steadily rise until he feels sick just thinking about it.
It doesn’t help to know that Nezumi and his crew are docked at the port of the Pious ward, the ship’s appearance changed once more to look like a merchant vessel. It still doesn’t negate the fact that there are a bunch of sorcerers and pirates stationed in a city where magic can be punished by death.
Very calming thoughts indeed.
He finally enters the Blessings feeling the weight of his old life dragging his eyes to all the corners he used to be familiar with, noticing the changes and the things that remain the same. It seems like it only takes a second for the guards to escort him to the office of his old professor and he closes his eyes to pray, to any deity that might be listening, so his words won’t betray him now.
The man that one taught him and guided him sits at the end of a long room, surrounded by books and years of accumulated knowledge. His hands are clasped on his desk, his face unreadable.
Shion can’t tell what he’s thinking, or what he thinks of him now. He remembers he vouched for him and his words during the trial, but in his eyes he’s probably still a traitor to the beliefs of the Kingdom.
He approaches the desk with steady steps and fetches the glass vial from his pocket, placing on the desk gingerly.
“Master,” he says, bowing his head respectfully. “I bring to you the Singing Waters, in hopes this might alleviate the transgressions of my past.”
***
It’s only fitting that, a week later, the sun is setting by the time he reaches the docks in the Pious Ward and finds his way to the ship.
The door of the captain’s cabin is half open when he gets there. He stops outside for a moment, taking in a shaky breath before stepping inside.
Nezumi is standing next to his desk. Slanted beams of light come through the window, catching on his hair the side of his neck.
This time, when he thinks beautiful, the word blossoms painlessly in his chest.
“How did it go?” Nezumi asks.
“It’s—they approved it. There’re a lot of questions they want to ask, still, but… it worked.”
Nezumi’s shoulders drop slightly and his mouth curves upward. “What about your mother?”
“That’s part of it. I think… I think by the end of the week I’ll get to see her.”
He feels breathless. Nezumi drops his gaze for a second.
“She’ll be happy.”
“Yes.”
A pause. Nezumi looks up. “And you?”
“What about me?”
“Are you happy?”
Shion smiles even though something in him hurts. “Yes. But I would be happier if you could stay.”
Nezumi chuckles, shaking his head.
“I was afraid you would say something like that.”
“Afraid?”
“Mmm… because, you see—” he says, taking the three steps that keep them apart. “It’d be foolish to pretend I wouldn’t like the same thing.”
Nezumi’s palm presses against his cheek and Shion leans into it. Closing his eyes.
The Gods are cruel, Nezumi said back in the cave. Shion’s inclined to agree now, as the warmth of the afternoon slowly fades to give room to the night.
“I’ll miss you,” he says, afraid he’ll choke on the words if he doesn’t let them go now.
“I know.”
“I don’t want to say goodbye”
“Who said anything about a goodbye?” Nezumi asks in a whisper. Shion opens his eyes to find his gaze already on him. “I’ll return. I have some business to take of and a crew that needs me, but I’ll be back.”
Shion frowns, if only to mock him a little.
“Isn’t that what all the sailors say?”
Nezumi laughs, and leans in to place a kiss on Shion’s forehead. “But I’m a rather unique sailor, wouldn’t you agree?”
Shion whispers a soft yes against Nezumi’s lips. He leans into him, hoping a kiss could linger indefinitely, relishing the feeling of fingers gently carding through his hair.
“I’ll be back,” he whispers once more against his lips. “I promise.”
And Shion knows this to be true, the same way he knows the sun will rise again and the stars will shine this night, he knows.
“I’ll be waiting.”
***
Coda
Three months later, he sits on an empty bench on the docks of the Pious Ward, holding his winter cloak close. Back at home, Karan waits with a blueberry pie and a lit fireplace. Rikiga is probably already on his way.
Here, he waits with an open heart and happiness blooming in his chest.
The cold wind blows softly and the waves crest and crash gently against the pier. There are ships in the distance, some approaching, some leaving.
He’s not sure how he notices it, but he does, instantly. It’s not the same ship he grew accustomed to, but he wasn’t expecting it to be.
He walks up to the edge of the pier, needing to be sure.
A few minutes later, he’s able to make out the name of the ship, painted with swirling letters on its side. It’s written in Laidoan and it reads “Aster’s kiss”.
He laughs, the cold forgotten, and even though the waves drown the sound, he knows he holds the happiness of a promise fulfilled.
He’s finally back.
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Sequestered
3 weeks. 21 days. 504 hours. 30,240 minutes. 1,814,400 seconds.
Jason was doing math. In his head. Because he was bored. Worse? He was irritated. Not because of the boredom, but because he was going to spend nearly two million seconds sequestered from the rest of the world with his brothers inside an 864 sq. ft. apartment.
“It’ll be a well-deserved vacation,” Dick smiled genially from the kitchen table. “The JL can take care of whatever is happening out there.”
“-tt- As if anyone of us will survive this quarantine,” Damian scowled. He was perched on the back of the couch that Jason was currently lying on.
“As long as you behave yourself, we’ll be fine,” Tim replied sitting at Jason’s small table with his laptop on the opposite side of Dick. “Besides, you didn’t have to come along, Demon Spawn.”
“Neither did you,” Jason pointed out beneath at least three thick blankets. “Actually, not a fucking one of you needed to show up! In fact, had you not, you could be out there with Bruce instead of taking up my clean air, my food, and my limited fucking space!”
Not one of his brothers showed him an ounce of pity or sympathy. They all three looked at him with their varying shades of light-colored eyes. Damian looked disgusted. Tim snarky, and Dick? Well, Dick might have looked at him with a touch of guilt in his eyes.
Dick should though. This whole stupid thing was his fault. Dickie-Bird heard that Jason had a fever and just had to show up to check on him. While he was at it, Golden Boy might as well drag their dipshit brothers along and really make everyone uncomfortable. It wasn’t like the whole nation was about to panic and insist on quarantine’s or anything.
Jason sniffed hard, trying to rearrange the “congestion” in his sinus cavities.
“Just blow your nose, Jason,” Tim sneered as he scrunched his own.
“Fuck you, it’s my house, I’ll deal with my mucus however the hell I want!” he grumbled, ignoring the croaky quality of his voice.
“Guys let’s not fight. We’re just at the beginning of this quarantine. We can’t be at each other’s throats already.” Dick frowned.
“This is lame,” Damian huffed and slid down to rest atop Jason’s ankles. “You don’t think they’ll forget to feed my pets?”
Jason’s heart softened just a touch at the concern Damian showed toward another living being. He tried to sigh but ended up coughing instead. Luckily, Dick was on it.
“Alfred would never forget about the animals in your room, Dami,” The oldest offered gently.
“Unless you’re hiding more than he knows about, then those ones will probably starve,” Tim shrugged.
Jason shouldn’t have laughed, but he couldn’t help it. It was vicious and nasty and very much in Tim’s wheelhouse when it came to Damian. He kind of liked Tim’s dark side. The kid took a lot of shit from Damian in particular. It was good to see him stand up for himself.
“Tim!” Dick scolded. “That’s not funny, Jason!”
“My cell phone is dead, let me use yours, Todd.”
Jason rolled his eyes and pulled the phone from his pocket. He really didn’t mean for tickle in his nose to catch him off guard, but it did and Jason wound up sneezing on his phone when he instinctively brought up his hands.
“Gross!” Tim chuckled.
Dick however came to the rescue as usual. One hand held out some tissues for Jason and the other was handing Damian the requested cell phone. “I’ll grab you some wipes for your phone, Jason,”
“Thanks,” Jason mumbled, tossing the slimed device on the coffee table beside the couch.
Damian pulled out his cell phone and immediately started trying to get a hold of Alfred. “Alfred? I… I have a raccoon. It’s in my closet. Yes. I know… Up in the crawl space… You will? You promise?”
“I know I’m surprised, how about you guys?” Tim snickered.
Jason grinned, as Damian flipped Tim off. Dick frowned at the antics, but he was moving about Jason’s apartment. His older brother took the liberty of cleaning up, a rarity in and of itself, but Jason wouldn’t argue. He wasn’t going to touch his phone again until it was clean.
“You know, I don’t have the virus they think I do,” Jason explained. “It’s just a common cold.”
“No one’s going to let us take that chance,” Tim sighed. “Bruce says he’ll have some supplies dropped off, but I gotta say, I’m more worried about him.”
Jason shook his head. “Don’t be. Without us around to bug him, he’ll be a lot more effective. Especially since most of the criminals are hiding, too. It’s not like they can just waltz into a hospital if they get sick.”
Dick blinked as he held Jason’s phone in one gloved hand, the other scrubbing down the device with an electronic safe sanitary wipe. “You know, that’s actually a good point. Black Mask isn’t offering medical and neither is Two-Face.”
“Penguin and Black Mask might,” Tim disagreed. “They both have a legitimate business.”
“Maybe they have a bad guy hospital,” Jason laughed. “Could you imagine?”
Timothy grinned. “Half of them seem to be doctors, it wouldn’t surprise me.”
Even Damian couldn’t help but snicker. “-tt- Mr. Freeze is the safest in his suit. They’d make him do all the check ups and testing.”
“Harley would be on hand for psychological support,” Dick added with a barely restrained laugh.
“For as poor and pathetic as our city is, education is of the utmost importance in Gotham. Especially among criminals,” Jason smiled to himself. “Speaking of doctors gone evil, I wanna watch Hannibal.”
“You can’t, Dami’s too young,” Dick denied.
“What!” Jason exclaimed.
“He’s an assassin Dick, I doubt there’s anything more gruesome than his own actions on that show,” Tim shrugged.
“It’s happens to contain graphic sex, gaslighting, and other themes that are not suitable for children!” Dick defended his stance.
“Did you read that off the Parental Guidance box?” Jason asked suspiciously.
“I’m not a baby. I can handle a primetime television show,” Damian insisted.
“No,” Dick shook his head. “I am not giving on this, find something appropriate to watch.”
Jason grinned triumphantly and pointed immediately to his shelf of movies and television series. “Pride and Prejudice, it is! I want the BBC series with Colin Firth, top shelf, third to the left.”
Dick’s eyes widened at his mistake as Tim and Damian groaned. Jason coughed for effect, pulling his brother from the agony of his defeat. He clapped his hands in the obnoxious “chop, chop” call to action that Jason knew irritated everyone.
Three weeks with his brothers? It might be a small space, but it was his small space, filled with his favorite things. He had hours and hours of books to listen to, read, or thanks to miniseries events, watch. After Pride and Prejudice he might even go with Jane Eyre just to really torture them all.
They thought they had him beat when the quarantine was first announced. Ha! They’d crack long before he did.
#batboys#bat brothers#forced bonding#quarantined#felt appropriate#Jason Todd#Tim Drake#Dick Grayson#Damian Wayne#small apartment#fluff#silly#bored writing
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“I Watched the Artemis Fowl Movie and It Made Me Very Upset” Liveblog!
So I decided I had to subject myself to this movie despite being Extremely Aware that it’s a massive pile of firey garbage. It was about as painful as expected, so I liveblogged to keep my sanity. Here’s basically what happened in my head while I was watching:
Josh Diggums: I feel so bad for Josh Gad's voice because it's painfully obvious they just didn't want Olaf showing up so they forced him into some terrible Bale-Batman voice that keeps cracking
why is this movie taking itself so seriously
Book Artemis: eternally unathletic dweeb
Movie Artemis: SURFING MASTER
the fuck, Branagh
THIS VOICE IS SO DAMN BAD, JOSH PLEASE STOP TALKING
okay Artemis is appropriately a little shit for EXACTLY ONE SCENE
FUCK OFF WITH FRIDGING THE MOM, BRANAGH
"ur mom's dead and ur dad's gone so ur a little shit" WHAT A GREAT COUNSELOR
fuck's sake
Book Artemis: immediately falls off whatever this hover thing is
COLIN FARRELL. SEXY MAN.
I ALMOST FORGIVE THEM FOR BRINGING HIM BACK EARLY
AND..... KNOWING ABOUT MAGIC
SDJFKSDF
WHATEVER
I WAS PREPARED FOR THIS
this voice is still terrible, Josh. I'm sorry
this kid is a pretty good actor
"all i really want is to believe in you" that was actually well-delivered
"Arty"
<sobbing>
OKAY IT'S NOT ACCORDING TO THE BOOK BUT FUCK ME THEIR RELATIONSHIP IS WELL DONE
i desperately need Butler to show up soon tho
I SPOKE TOO SOON
"DOMOVOI" ??!!?? YOU FUCKS
why
are his eyes
fucking ELECTRIC BLUE
HIS LITERAL FUKDFSUCING NAME IN THE BOOKS IS 'BUTLER' IT'S PART OF BEING AN INSANELY GOOD SECRET AGENT GUARDIAN HE'S NOT AN ACTUFL FUCKING BUTLER AND LITERALLY NO ONE EVER CALLS HIM "THE BUTLER" BUT HIS NAME IS BUTLER BECAUSE HIS REAL NAME IS SECRET HE'S FUCKING SECURITY FUCKING DID YOU READ THIS FUCKING BOOK SERIES AT ALL BRANAGH OR DID YOU JUSTDSJFKLDSHFSD:LFSEFAGH
i'm sorry
Butler is my absolute favorite character of the entire damn series and they fucking
can't even get OOOONNNNNEEEEEEEEE CHARACTER CORRECT
SCREAMS
did they think calling him "Butler" would be weird because they cast a black guy?????
AGAIN WHY WITH THE FUCKING ELECTRIC BLUE CONTACTS THEY'RE SO OBVIOUSLY FAKE IT LOOKS SO BAD. IF YOU MAKE THE DECISION TO CAST AN AFRICAN AMERICAN MAN JUST FUCKING OWN THAT HE HAS DARK EYES DON'T DO THIS
THE "OWL STAR"???? REALLY???? WHY NOT FOWL STAR
WHY
NOT
IT'S JUST SUCH AN ARBITRARY DUMBASS CHANGE IT MAKES NO SENSE
PLEASE DID I JUST MISUNDERSTAND THE REPORTER MAN
DID THE CAPTIONS JUST MISUNDERSTAND HIM?????
NOPE IT'S LITERALLY THE O W L S T A R
fuck off
i'm sorry
stuff like that just bothers me a lot
it makes ABSOLUTELY no sense to change it
Fowl Star made sense bECAUSE IT'S OWNED BY ARTEMIS FOWL
artemis has a lot more emotions than i remember him having
i will not forgive them for destroying the Butler/Artemis relationship in favor of a Dad they fucking fridge in the first half hour of the movie
oh boy nursery rhymes as codes
GROUNDBREAKING
i think the fairies would have something to say about you hiding their own shit from them, MISTER SENIOR
it's still a bad voice, Josh, I'm so sorry
okay Haven is pretty nice
"Haven" not "Haven City"
pretty sure
holly being a 13 year old girl is disconcerting
that was mentioned in a review
they're supposed to be Child-Sized not ACTUAL CHILDREN
also "small person = higher pitched voice" is such a stupid trope please stop
i like the Being diversity around the city
like lots of different types of humanoids
josh desperately wants to do the Olaf voice
i'm so sorry Josh
okay aside from the shit voice Diggums is pretty good
lol Cudgeon's already in jail
i
okay then
i know this is Opal Koboi
meh
i hate her in the books so they can fuck her up all they want
judi dench is batman too i guess
how many cigs you smoke judi root
OH BOY HOLLY HAS MISSING DADDY ISSUES TOO
fucking shit
"you're 84" and you look like a fUCKING THIRTEEN YEAR OLD
such bad choices
every time they say "Domovoi" i--
HISDFHSDHFH
JULIET
SHE'S
HIS
FUCKING
NIECE?????????!!!!!!!!!!!!!!??????????
SDFJLS:DKF FUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUCCCCCCCCCCCCKKKKKKKKKKK YYYYYYYOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUU
FUCK YOU
FUCK
FUCK
FUCK YOU KENNETH BRANAGH
NO
NO
NO
NO
SHE'S
HIS
FUCKING
SISTER
HIS BABY SISTER HE LOVES AND CARES FOR EVEN MORE THAN ARTEMIS AND THAT'S A COMPLETELY DIFFERENT RELATIONSHIP THAN UNCLE AND NIECE
HOW COULD YOU LITERALLY DESTROY EVERYTHING ABOUT BUTLER AND STILL SLEEP AT NIGHT
<vomits into the sun>
eoin colfer i hope you made so much money off of this SHITSTACK
(genuinely tho that's literally the only consolation; now he can write more Good Books)
Juliet is cute but i know about all she does is make sandwiches
so fuck this
judi dench is Good
foaly is Okay
why's he wearing clothes tho
the chutes are a lot more... open than expected
BEECHWOOD SHORT THE TRAITOR
FUCK OFF
WHY IS HOLLY’S CHARACTER DEFINED BY HER FUCKING FATHER
THIS IS SO MUCH WORSE AN OUTCOME THAN I EVEN EXPECTED GIVEN THEY EVISCERATED HER CHARACTER'S DRIVE BY MAKING THE L.E.P. ALREADY HAVE FEMALE OFFICERS AND COMMANDERS
"get out cudgeon before i throw you out" okay they got Root completely right at least
aside from making him a her
but that's okay
because it's Judi Dench
awwwww happy flying scene bUT HOLLY YOU'RE SUPPOSED TO BE SHIELDED GOt DAMN
“any update?” "yes. i'm freezing" amazing, Butler
i mean dOmOvOi
HOLLY YOU'RE STILL NOT SHIELDED
CGI isn't too bad in this but honestly that's not impressive anymore
awwwww cute wedding scene
troll is about as ugly as possible
LOL JUST FUCKING THROW TIME FREEZE UP LIKE IT'S NOTHING
OKAY
LOL HOLLY GO DEAL WITH THE TROLL DON'T FOCUS ON ONE SMALL CHILD
THAT'S NOT HOW A TIME FREEZE WORKS
I
i mean it's COOL
i love the little Men in Green zipping around
but it doesn't make ANY sense
LOL SO WHY DO THE PEOPLE THINK THE PLACE IS TRASHED
lol gently floating troll
Hollyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy
Judi Root continues to be amazing
ok tbf Opal Koboi would be after the Aculos if it existed
OP MacGuffin plots are so tired tho like really Branagh
i love the wings on her suit
ARTEMIS WHEN DID YOU GET TO THE TREE
holly ur a bad 84-year-old officer
LOL CUDGEON IS RIGHT ON
AND JUDI ROOT CONTINUES TO BE
"Not Happy!" lol wat
who wrote that bit of dialogue and said "yes this a perfectly good thing to have her say when she wakes up in a cage"
"mesmerism"
boy i love these exposition dump convos between Mr. Sr. and Arty
LOL "most human beings are afraid of gluten, how do you think they'd handle goblins" is a great line
out of touch, but still funny
...why does the time freeze take forever to generate now when you did it in TWO SECONDS BEFORE
calm down holly damn
foaly's very pretty
sO DID THEY FREEZE THE *ENTIRE WORLD*????????
I THOUGHT THE POINT WAS TO FREEZE THINGS INSIDE SO YOU HAVE MOONLIGHT LONGER
AND
AND
whatever
i love this fucking ARMY coming out of literally everywhere
"TOP OF THE MORNIN'" OH MY FUCKING GOODNESS
whole movie is worth it
for that line
i love that they're entirely in green
and no one ever Shields
ever
they mentioned Shields once but NO ONE IS SHIELDED
BUTLER WOULD NEVER LET ARTEMIS INTO A FIGHT
SCREAMS
"TAKE THE SHOT"
WHY IS THE TIME FREEZE SO EASILY DESTABILIZED
FOALY
ARE YOU TELLING ME NO ONE HAS EVER SHOT YOUR FUCKING ENORMOUS DEVICE
omg no U GAVE OPAL KOBOI LEGITIMATE REASONS FOR DOING WHAT SHE'S DOING
YOU GAVE HER A SAD FRUSTRATING BACKSTORY
SHE'S SUPPOSED TO BE AN ARROGANT SELF-SERVING BITCH AND NOTHING ELSE
TWENTY SEVEN MINUTES??????
hOW DID ARTEMIS KNOW ABOUT MULCH DIGGUMS SPECIFICALLY
lol that is 100% a completely inhumane prison what the fuck, fairies
why does Holly have human music
well i'm glad we didn't have to watch mulch almost eat a dude's head
"My father was kidnapped."
"My father is dead."
"Can I trust you?"
"You'll have to."
BUT WHY
WHAT IS THIS DIALOGUE
WHAT IS THIS CHARACTER PROGRESSION
THERE's NO REASON TO TRUST HER
OR TO NEED TO TRUST HER
THIS IS COMPLETELY UNEARNED AND STUPID
glad holly's entire character REVOLVES AROUND A MAN NOW, BRANAGH
LOL THEY JUST DIDN'T GIVE ROOT A FIRST NAME???
JUDI ROOT CONFIRMED
"listen to us, grunting at each other like a pair of hippos with a throat infection" LMAO
i hope that was Josh Gad improv
LOL HE JUST FUCKING DESTROYS EVERYTHING IN HIS WAY WHILE TUNNELING
YOU DIDN'T EVEN REALLY TUNNEL IN, MULCH
HOW DID YOU COME OUT OF A PAINTING
DO THEY HAVE PAINTINGS IN A BASEMENT???
WHAT HAPPENED TO THE SHEETROCK OR WHATEVER
IT WOULD HAVE BEEN SO EASY TO JUST
UGH
FOLLOW THE BOOK
COME ON
MULCH YOU ARE THE WORST BURGLAR
"what would your parents be" THEY'D BE CENTAURS MULCH
is... is Mulch on the second floor
HE TUNNELED THROUGH THE WALL ONTO THE SECOND FLOOR
artemis... just.. lets holly out
ok cool
LOL HIS NOSE HAIRS GROW AND MOVE LIKE TENTACLES
stupid and... funny? i guess
at least Cudgeon is the piece of shit he is in the book lol
oh boy troll time
BUTER WOULD NEVER LET MULCH DIGGUMS PICKPOCKET HIM
"jam all magic" OMFG THAT'S NOT POSSIBLE
BUTLER WOULD NEVER LET ARTEMIS FACE DOWN A FUCKING TROLL
LOL THEY JUST FIRE THE TROLL LIKE A BULLET
A TROLL-ET
DOMOVOI YOU ARE COMPLETELY USELESS WHAT THE FUCK
i wonder if kids even like this movie
omg butler couldn't even jump
i
i don't understand
he literally DOESN'T HELP AT ALL
IT'S HIS WHOLE THING
IS BEING ABLE TO KICK ASS
FUCKING COME ON BRANAGH
yeah fuck you branagh
are... are the fairies just DYING TO THE TIME FREEZE COLLAPSE???
"goodbye my friend. i'm sorry i was FUCKING USELESS"
branagh you're trying to activate my feelings with this Sad Death Scene(TM) but i am IMPERVIOUS because artemis has had NO RELATIONSHIP WHATSOEVER WITH THIS """DOMOVOI"""
COOL HE'S BACK NOW I’M SO GLAD ACTUAL FULL ON DEATH HAS ZERO CONSEQUENCES NOW THANKS TO OP FAIRY MAGIC
WHAT GREAT WRITING THIS IS
"i didn't cry did i" FUCK OFF
WHY IS IT SO DANGEROUS WHEN THE TIME FREEZE ENDS
WHY IS YOUR TECH SO SHITTY, FOALY
TIME FREEZES AREN'T SUPPOSED TO BE DANGEROUS TO THE OCCUPANTS
THAT GOES AGAINST ALL OF FAIRY RULES
...okay and then it just ends..........?
Domovoi: "you have to try!"
Artemis: "i can't, tho"
Domovoi: "it's too dangerous!"
WHAT IS THIS DIALOGUE
WHO WROTE THIS ABSOLUTE DRIVEL
"the aculos for my father"
THE L.E.P. DOESN'T EVEN HAVE YOUR FATHER YOU ABSOLUTE DOOF
holly how do u know how to do this
the... the aculos is just the fucking Book?
i feel slapped in the face
she just recites the words and. and.
whatever
whatever
i'm done
GO FIND YOUR DAD WHO'S MAGICALLY BACK
WHY WOULD HE BE IN THE BED ARTEMIS
YOU'RE SUPPOSED TO BE A GENIUS
this girl who plays Holly cannot act
i'm sorry girl
MAGICALLY BACK DAD
HOORAY HOLLY'S CHARACTER CONTINUES TO BE DEFINED BY HER FATHER
FUCK
YOU
WRITERS
AND BRANAGH
BUTLER WOULD NEVER CRY, DOMOVOI
i like the cool earpiece they gave Judi Root to maybe? disguise her hearing aid?
Haven does look pretty cool
too much water above tho it’s not Atlantis guys come on
"i'm a criminal mastermind" LITERALLY WHEN DID YOU SHOW ANY SORT OF MASTERMIND BEHAVIOR OR CRIMINAL BEHAVIOR
BESIDES BRIEFLY KIDNAPPING HOLLY AND THEN IMMEDIATELY LETTING HER OUT
LMAO THAT LAST SHOT OF JULIET JUST LOOKING EXCITEDLY OUT OF THE WINDOW AT THE HELICOPTER WHILE EVERYONE LEAVES HER BEHIND
WHAT'S THE POINT OF THAT EVEN
THIS POOR GIRL YOU’RE JUST LEAVING HER ALONE
WOW THIS PRISON/INTERROGATION PLACE HAS LIKE
NO SECURITY
HI HOLLY WHY ARE YOU HERE??????
THIS WHOLE ENDING IS JUST THE STUPID CAP ON TOP OF A STUPID SUNDAE
i need to go listen to the books again now
#artemis fowl#artemis fowl movie#liveblog#spoilers#flaming hot garbage#disney seriously who the FUCK did you make this movie for#cause it sure wasn't the fans
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My OC’s As GFH
SO I was tagged by @bleudragonfire and I be an insomniac and extra... so I did Grace, MJ and Colin...
I am going to tag @bigprincess-energy, @kingmaking @gamer-purgatory @johnnseed @josephseeds-rosary @strafethesesinners and idk who else... again tagging always makes me feel odd... no pressure or anything
Grace Seed - GFH - Sniper/Scout
(Timber would come as a package deal... girl goes no place with out her dog)
+ Do I look like I am joking
+ Excuse me, do you think that was funny?
+ I swear, these fuckers mess with my dog one more time.
+ Don’t fuck with my dog!
+ Get ‘em boy!
+ I am not amused, Hurk (any mention of Hurk’s Gate)
+ This is exactly why my dad says ‘Cull the Herd’
+ Don’t be a dumb ass, dumb ass
+ Call me Peggie one more time, one more time....
+ Uh... I have a bad feeling about this
+ If Ethan opens his mouth one more time, I am cutting his tongue out... plan? Plan? Can I get a co-sign on this.
+ What about me says “Happy Childhood”?
+ I love my dog and my rifle... in that order...
+ Listen, I am not saying my dad could kick your dad’s ass... but I am not saying this is also not straight facts (to Carmina)
+ I am nice, I haven’t killed anyone on our side... in spite the fact that I don’t think Hurk has showered in the last 17 years...
+ Just because I was born into Eden’s Gate... doesn’t mean I believe anything they preach, alright... now shut up. I am not talking about this again.
+ (when hurt) I am fine I swear... no... fuck... NOT FINE... VERY NOT FINE...
Mary Jane Seed - GFH - ....
let’s be real MJ would never be a GFH but more like the Dutch giving you missions from the Seeds... cuz in this world you could join Eden’s Gate...
+You have one job, not to fuck this up... so what do you do... fuck shit up... good job there kid...
+ Eh, you with the face, listen here right quick... Big Daddy Joe *John in the background “don’t call him that!”* Right, “Father” needs you take care of this little shit weasel... you do down?
+ ‘Ello... you there I swear half the time I am talking to myself on this thing, listen up my asshole brothers and their little Resistance are really starting to give my girl Faith some trouble. I need you to go down there and put those idiots in their place...
+ Yes... me again... your beloved first lady of Holland Valley... My other half seems to have gotten himself into a bit of pickle down in Falls End... can you go help get Johnny Boy out of this... make sure they don’t hit his face... that’s how he makes the money... cuz it sure isn’t his flat ass bringing home the bacon.... I love him and all but boy has absolutely no ass...but please go save it... I am rather fond of the rest of him ya know...
+ Before you even start, you have been doing a bang up job keeping my idoit brothers in their place, good for you. Would you like a cookie? Shit...sorry spending all day with two toddlers and John... okay three toddlers... *laughs* I forget Cookies do not solve all the worlds problems... but SPEAKING of problems... Jacob is dealing with a hell of a one from those Whitetails. Want to go lend Big Red a hand?
+ Soooo Colin handed you your ass... on a silver platter... I understand that could be painful... but maybe don’t let it happen again... because I really am almost starting to like you.
+ (seeing her in person) Ya know... I always assumed you were taller...
+ Betray my family and I will not hesitate to punch you with my ring hand... understood? And just remember every time John does something stupid he buys me a new ring... the bigger the fuck up... the bigger the rock... so use your imagination on the size of diamonds that will be colliding with your face should you betray us... okay... good.. alright now... go fuck some shit up!
Colin MacKenna - GFH - Assault Specialist
(wanted to include Colin in this because he is an actual OC...... and snarky AF)
+ Oh so we are just walking into places like we own them now...
+ You think you understand how Eden’s Gate works... but you don’t you really don’t.
+ God I need a beer... Hurk... HURK... Beer Me...
+ You know what, when you have seen as much of the crazy shit the Seeds have done... at some point the level of depravity doesn’t shock you any more...
+ What’s the Bliss like? Like every happy moment of your life wrapped into one feeling... it consumes you... that much happiness in a world of pain is addictive.. powerful...
+ I always wanted to save her... (someone else “who’) Faith... she never asked for any of this.
+ I always knew my sister would wedge her way into something like this, she has thought she was special from the day she was born...
+ Hey, watch out Peggies just over the hill...
+ Tell John I said KISS MY ASS!
+ There are days I wish Sean had never thought it was good idea to introduce John to my sister...
+ We have one option, stop the Seeds... yes... Mary Jane is included.. she stopped being a MacKenna a long time ago..
+ Any time you want to come help... ANY TIME (when hurt)
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we need the hcs to follow up 😳✌🏻
Yeah saw that one coming 😅
I’ll try to separate them as best as I can. They’re mostly more sexy times hcs, but I am making the last one something they won’t tell anyone else and why. Also, I am a firm believer in good communication and conversation between partners. There are certain kinks that I am not familiar with and some I’m just not comfortable with. I want it to be stressed these couples communicate with each other and do not push the other past what they’re comfortable with.
Speeddemon: (some of these are from their sexytimes HC list, but I did add on to a few ;) )
-Damian has a huge praise kink. Irey figures it out when she tells him how good he is to her (aka that boy could spend hours with his head between her legs) and he gets this strange, happy look. She tests it out one or two more times before telling him about it.
-Irey has a thing for his Robin uniform. On his birthday after they started dating, he found Irey sitting on his bed in lacey green panties and a red corset with the Robin logo on one breast. They didn’t leave the room that night.
-They’re the two more likely to roleplay as their hero personas, especially if they have a quicky after patrol before heading back to the tower.
-Irey and Damian are both flexible so they’re more likely to explore different positions. Damian really likes anything that allows him to see her face.
-Damian has a very small kink involving his mouth--he loves to kiss, lick, bite, suck every part of her that she’ll let him.
-Irey can vibrate different parts of her body and you had better believe she uses that to her advantage during sex.
-While Irey heals almost instantly from any mark he leaves, she’ll leave scratch marks on his back and chest.
-They’ve brought food into bed a few times. Damian likes chocolate syrup, even though it makes a massive mess.
- What they won’t tell anyone: Theirs isn’t really a kink, but it’s more of a favorite position. They’ll both lay on their sides, facing each other, with her leg over his hip. Neither one of them has more control than the other, they can go slower than they would in other positions, and they get to be closer than with other positions. They don’t tell anyone about it because it’s not really worth mentioning. It’s a special thing for them.
Superstar: (done sexy times for them too, just adding to it.)
-Jon’s way more dominant in bed than most people realize.
-Mar’i’s a switch so she lets Jon take the lead most nights.
- The easiest way for Jon to get her flustered/slightly horny is to call her a good girl. He’ll do it during training, just under his breath, to make her squirm.
-They have Blue kryptonite and Tamaranean strength handcuffs. Mar’i used them on Jon first and did a striptease while he watched.
-They do not have to use condoms as it’s difficult/impossible for them to conceive naturally. (toying around with this because I’d love to do a fic with them having a baby.) Jon rarely pulls out and Mar’i has no issues with that.
-Mar’i’s a dancer so lapdances are pretty frequent for him (and never get old), but there have been a few times he’s given her one and it ended well for him.
-Mar’i really likes ‘sexy’ costumes because she thinks they’re funny. Until Jon gives her a mind-blowing orgasm after she shows him a “sexy superboy” costume based on his new uniforms.
-Mar’i blows Jon in the Batcave...frequently. There’s a certain blind spot in the cameras she knows about and he legit cannot say no when she asks (usually because she’ll ask after they’ve made out a while.)
-They each have a hard no- Mar’i doesn’t like being degraded and Jon doesn’t like having his butt touched. Jon was trying to talk dirty to her in the middle of sex and called her a slut; She kicked him out of bed and wouldn’t touch him for a week. Jon’s thing is more of a comfort zone situation, it’s not an area he likes to be touched and it takes them a few times before they realize that’s just a no go area.
-What they won’t tell anyone: Mar’i likes being choked when they’re having rough sex. Jon and Mar’i can hold their breath longer than normal humans, but they’re still safe. The reason they don’t tell anyone is probably the same reason most of them don’t think Jon would be dominant: He’s very sweet in his day to day life. Jon’s the kind of guy that would move heaven and earth for the people he loves, so the idea he chokes his girlfriend during sex and she likes it wouldn’t make sense to most of them. Plus, Damian is technically her uncle (even though they act like siblings more) and if he found out, Jon would be dead.
Speeding Arrow: (haven’t really done a whole lot of sexy times stuff for them so.)
-They’re both talkers during sex. Not really like dirty talk, though that happens, but like, there are times they’ll have a conversation while doing it. I stand by the idea Jai and Lian have bickered about guitars while she was on top of him.
-Jai, like his sister, can vibrate his body parts. Lian’s first time was amazing because of his vibrating dick.
-Lian’s got a thing for his body hair. As in, she has straight up told him no sex when he had to wax his chest for a mission until it grew back. And they did not have sex until it grew back.
-Jai can still manipulate the speedforce to get super strength. When Lian demands him to go harder and faster, he obeys her. She usually can’t walk properly the next day.
-They’re the only couple that’s likely to have hate sex during a fight. They’ve been friends since they were like 3? So they’ve had a fair share of fights. Now, there are times they’ll argue and things get heated in a different way. Jai will make a comment about getting rid of her bitchy attitude and Lian usually calls him an asshole.
-A few guys from other teams will occasionally ask Jai if he’s the fast guy at everything (because that’s an original joke.). He usually brushes it off without a thought. They say it in front of Lian once and she straight up doesn’t like that. She told the guys that Jai would see them later. When they asked why, she said, “going to test your theory.” before walking off. Jai has to admit he likes when she takes control like that.
-They’re arguably the most vanilla of the group. They know what they like. They might branch out with locations and some things, but for the most part, all they need is each other for a good time.
-What they don’t tell anyone: They both occasionally use sex to repress unwanted emotions or get some control. Lian’s more of the former and Jai the latter. Jai’s aware of it and makes sure to check in with her before they do anything. Afterward, he’ll ask her if she needs to talk or if there’s anything he can help her with. Sometimes she tells him what’s wrong, other times she just lays curled up next to him. He will refuse to sleep with her if he thinks something’s really wrong. Jai’s less likely to use sex as a way to feel in control in some part of his life, but it does happen. She’s the same way with Jai on communication. The reason they don’t tell anyone is because they both recognize it is a very unhealthy way to deal with problems, but fuck it.
Colin X Milagro
-Milagro will use her Lantern ring in bed to hold Colin down, which he fucking loves.
-Similar to Damian, Milagro uses her mouth a lot in bed but tends to bite and suck more than kiss and lick.
-They have the most toys out of all the couples. They like trying new things.
-Milagro likes it when he blindfolds her and does sense play. It’s her favorite form of foreplay.
-Colin and Milagro mostly keep things in the bedroom, but there are a few planets they’ve had sex on. These were deserted planets that Oa has dismissed basically. They have a planet bang list.
-There’s another exception to the bedroom rule, vibrating panties. Milagro lost a bet at some point and had to wear them for a full day. Colin had control of the remote. She was ready to kill him by dinner time because he wouldn’t let her get off. He does make up for it, but barely if you ask her.
-During weeks when he’s turned into Abuse a lot, Milagro gives him a full body massage. I do mean full body. He usually feels bad because he wants her to get off too. Sometimes she’ll let him touch her or use one of their many toys, but for the most part she tells him to just enjoy the massage.
-Unlike Irey and Mar’i, she’s not a fan of costumes in bed. Lingerie yes, mostly because she likes how it makes her feel not to get him aroused. No, to do that she puts on the trench coat he wears and nothing underneath.
-What they won’t tell anyone: They have a strapless dildo that Milagro will fuck Colin with. In my canon, Colin is bisexual which everyone knows about. He asks her if she’ll fuck him like a year or so after they started dating. She does hesitate because she doesn’t know what to do. They research it together and learn how to make it enjoyable for both of them. It’s one of the more intimate acts they do because he’s physically bigger than her. They don’t tell anyone about it, not because he’s ashamed he likes it, but because it’s something special for them. It’s a time when he can be more vulnerable to her and she gets a chance to make him feel as good as he makes her feel.
#damian wayne#irey west#mar'i grayson#lian harper#jon kent#jai west#colin wilkes#milagro reyes#smutty headcanon#I regret...somethings lol#definitely going to hell
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First Impressions 10 - Saturday Night Fever
I was so glad to actually write this chapter it’s not even funny. I started five times and trashed each one but FINALLY! This is the Netherfield Ball chapter and second only to the Pemberley scenes as my favorite in Pride and Prejudice.
There are mentions of anxiety in this chapter.
Also obvs you can picture whatever song you want for the dance, I just had the Bee Gees - More Than A Woman running through my head at the time lol.
FIC MASTERLIST
FIRST IMPRESSIONS 10
SATURDAY NIGHT FEVER
LIZZIE
If she was perfectly honest with herself, Lizzie was kind of looking forward to the wrap party. It was probably the chance of a lifetime - there weren’t likely to be any glam Hollywood parties in her future so she figured that she may as well enjoy this one. Charlie was, naturally, embracing the event wholeheartedly and had even managed to rope her into a trip to the city for new threads. According to him absolutely everything in her closet was too awful to be worn in public.
As usual he was right, Lizzie thought as she looked in the mirror. In a million years she never would have picked out this dress for herself, but she had to admit, it looked fantastic. Charlie had worked his magic with her hair and face and she almost didn’t recognize the smoky eyed woman staring back at her. It was the first time in years that she actually liked what she saw.
“Come on Bennett, time to go show those asholes whats, what!”
Charlie was waiting by her front door, over the top as usual in a silver top hat and makeup that would put Ziggy Stardust to shame. Not for the first time she felt the little tug in her heart, he really was gorgeous. It didn’t happen often, the moment of wishing he wasn’t gay, and she’d even told him about it. Charlie had never laughed at her, or brushed it off. He simply agreed that had life been different they probably would have been meant for one another. She wasn’t in love with him, not in this life, but it have happened very easily and every now and then, it made her a bit sad.
“Get that look off your face woman, I know I look good enough to eat.” Charlie sighed dramatically. “I’m on the prowl tonight and I need my wing woman.”
Lizzie laughed. “Are you sure? I’m likely to frighten all your prospects away with my bitch face.”
“Looking like that darling, they’ll be flocking to you and I’ll be there to ease their broken hearts when you turn them down.”
“Well you certainly have it all figured out don’t you.”
“When don’t I babe?” he winked. “Now get your coat and let’s go before I miss anything.”
The ballroom at the hotel had been completely transformed and Lizzie was almost speechless when they stepped into the lobby. She supposed it wasn’t all that big a deal to the rich and famous but her small town heart was a flutter with excitement at the sight. Gauzy fabric covered the bland beige walls and tables were set with linens and centerpieces fit for royalty. Everywhere she looked there was something gorgeous that she wouldn’t have expected to see, right down to the soft candlelight that was the room’s only illumination.
There was no sign of Brad though and a check of her cell showed no missed messages. Despite her misgivings, she’d still been excited to see him here and he had promised that Jack’s presence wasn’t going to stop him from attending. He was probably just late, she tried to tell herself, knowing it was a lie.
“There you are Lizzie!” she cringed at her mother’s loud voice as her family moved toward her.
“That’s my queue sweets.” Charlie kissed her cheek. “Come find me later.”
“Fucking traitor.” she muttered as he dashed away into the throng of people.
Turning around with a sigh, Lizzie plastered a smile on her face, barely keeping it in place when she saw what Lydia was, or rather wasn’t, wearing. She glanced at Maya who simply shrugged in defeat.
“Hey pumpkin.” her father reached her before the others and his weary look of resignation told him everything she needed to know about the situation. “You look lovely.”
“Thanks Dad, but I can’t believe you let her out of the house dressed like that.” she whispered as he pulled away from the hug.
Ben simply sighed, shunted to the side as Chloe approached, eying Lizzie up and down.
“Do I meet your approval mom?” she snarked.
“You look very nice. Her mother admitted. “You’ll never have Maya’s charm and sweetness but you do look very nice.”
“Gee thanks mom, at least I’m actually wearing clothing.” Lizzie looked pointedly at Lydia who was tapping her foot and looking bored.
“Shut up Liz” she snapped, cracking a piece of gum.
“Stop it both of you! Lizzie leave your sister alone!”
Lizzie bit her tongue, feeling her cheeks go red while Lydia stuck out her tongue behind her mother’s back.
“Lizzie, I was meaning to ask you something.” Maya piped up, quickly gauging the situation.
She took her sister’s arm and let her lead them to where Tom was standing with Jack and Caro. Honestly she would have rather stayed and fought with Lydia.
“Eliza!” Caro practically sneered, looking stunning in a barely there pink dress. “Oh, your whole family is here, how nice.” Her tone implied the exact opposite of her words.
“Actually Mary and Kate aren’t here.” Lizzie murmured, craning her head to look for Brad.
Jack, being his usual pleasant self merely inclined his head in greeting before looking away, dismissing her completely.
Prick, she thought to herself as she tried to seperate from the group, without any luck.
“Lizzie dear,” her mother had her arm, “I promised poor Colin that you would at least dance with him tonight. He’s been quite desolate since he came back you know. I think he hopes you’ll take him back.”
The excitement in Chloe’s eyes at that thought made Lizzie feel ill. She couldn’t believe what she was hearing. Well ok, her mother arranging things, that she could believe but not the bullshit that Colin had obviously been spewing. How dare he?
“I need a drink.” she snapped, stalking away into the crowd before anyone could stop her.
Fuming all the way to the bar, she ordered a Scotch ready to down the whole thing in one gulp.
“I’ll be taking that Red.” Charlie was there, sliding up next to her and stealing her drink, downing it smoothly before she even had a chance to protest. “You know you can’t drink.” he whispered, smiling at anyone who appeared curious enough to try and listen to what was going on.
“I don’t care.” she huffed, feeling like a scolded child.
“Listen dollface, I know how your mom gets and I guess she got to you. However drinking with your medication will just create a spectacle of you being carried out of here too far out of it to know your own name. And everyone in town will talk about it for years.”
“You don’t know what happened.” But she was conceding that he had a point.
“I’m going to guess she told you to play nice with poor, heartbroken Colin. He’s plying that shit all over town.”
He was right, as fucking usual.
“Listen, I’m not saying that you shouldn’t be upset. Just don’t give anyone the satisfaction of seeing you upset. The best way to stick it to that piece of shit is to pretend that you just aren’t affected at all.”
“I bloody hate you sometimes.”
“You love me and you know it.” Charlie placed a glass of cola in front of her, his arm slung over her shoulder as they perused the room.
Maya was dancing with Tom and Lizzie couldn’t help but smile at the serene look on her sister’s face as she looked up at him. She was clearly in love with him and Lizzie couldn’t have been happier for them. It didn’t matter what anyone else thought.
“What’s the deal with those two anyway?”
“Maya and Tom? What do you mean?”
“Well have they ‘sealed the deal’ so to speak. Seriously she needs to get him in the sack.”
“You know Maya isn’t like that.” Though she was fairly sure they already had, not that Maya had said anything.
“She needs to get like that, when that boy leaves Maya needs to be the only thing on his mind.”
“They are crazy about each other Charlie.”
“Well they hide it well, seriously though, Maya needs to up her game, you’ve seen the women here tonight.”
Lizzie’s brow furrowed as she thought about what Charlie was saying. Maya was admittedly very reserved and even though she knew her sister, Charlie’s observations had her worrying. She had said nothing about Tom beyond this week. He was spending Thanksgiving with them though, surely that counted for something. Charlie was just being a pain in the ass.
She watched him moving through the crowd now, a hit with everyone he came in contact with, male or female. More than once she had wished she could be more like him, so easy with everyone he met. She knew of no-one who disliked him while most people usually thought she was either stuck-up or awkward and boring.
Her eyes danced across the ballroom, Colin was so far nowhere in sight, but there was still no sign of Brad. She should have known better, it wasn’t the first time she’d been stood up. Spotting Jack standing with a group of men she narrowed her eyes. If looks could kill, she laughed bitterly to herself, liking the vision of him laid out on the floor. Yes, shed was irrationally angry and him and no she didn’t care. It didn’t matter what her thoughts were about Brad, it was Jack’s fault that she was standing alone at the bar instead of dancing in a killer dress. It was ALL Jack’s fault.
He chose that moment to look her way, his drink to his lips, long fingers wrapped around his glass, his clothes….well they were perfect for fuck’s sake. She actually had to bite the inside of her cheek to avoid making an embarrassing noise. The bastard had no business looking as good as he did, just as her body had no business betraying her the way it was. She would be damned if she gave him anything, despite her trembling knees. She refused to look away as she threw back her now flat soda, enjoying the surprise in his eyes. Enjoying it so much that she didn’t notice Colin coming up beside her. Too late she realized he was there, only when she smelled his cologne and almost dropped her glass. Remembering Charlie’s advice and her own determination, she forced herself into turning, her best ‘bitch face’ firmly in place.
“What do you want Colin?”
“I was promised a dance.” his eyes slide over her from head to toe and she barely repressed a shudder.
“Then why come to me? My mother promised you a dance, so go ask her.”
There was anger sparking in his eyes and she fought back the familiar fear. She knew what he was capable of when he was angered, but she still wasn’t going to give in.
“I was promised a dance with you.” he smiled, his eyes cold like a snake’s.
“This isn’t the middle ages, my mother doesn’t decide who I dance with.”
“Everyone is watching, you don’t want to make a scene do you?”
Lizzie shrugged.
“I’m not causing a scene and I don’t care who’s watching.”
His smile never faltered as his fingers wrapped around her wrist, tightly. Lizzie resisted the urge to yank herself out of his grasp. The point was to not give him the satisfaction of a response. Instead, fighting the bile rising in her throat she looked pointedly down at his had and then up at his face, staring him down she put her hand over his, pulling it off her arm and taking a step back.
“Good night Colin.” she said firmly, turning on her heel and walking away.
She managed to hold her breath until she was out of sight of the ballroom, making her way quickly to the ladies room. Locking herself in a stall she collapsed against the cool metal door, breath coming in ragged gasps, legs feeling like jelly. She couldn’t believe what she had just done. Before if she had even looked at him in a way he didn’t like he would have made her pay, but now….. She laughed, feeling lightheaded. There was nothing he could do to her, he was completely powerless. Colin Ryan couldn’t hurt, control or scare her anymore except in her own mind, and only if she allowed.
Taking a few minutes to compose herself, Lizzie still felt giddy. The power was all hers and she was determined to go and have a good time, everyone else could be damned. She was still shaking and though she wanted to her body wouldn’t move out of the bathroom. A million thoughts ran through her head and right in the middle was a vision of all those people, crowding around her, closing in, blocking any chance for escape. It only took an instant to realize what was happening and what she needed to do before she had a full-blown panic attack in a hotel toilet.
Closing her eyes she pulled in a deep breath, holding it for the count of three before slowly letting out again. A few repetitions later and the dizziness subsided, along with the trembling, enough for her to be able to swallow a pill. Looking at herself in the mirror she saw wide, frightened eyes and knew that Colin had still managed to get to her.
“Pull yourself together.” she muttered to her reflection. “You are better than this, you are stronger. Don’t let the bastards drag you down.”
She repeated the mantra sternly, over and over until her heartbeat slowed and her legs felt strong beneath her again.
“Right, that’s the end of that. We go out there, we dance, we have fun and we go home. Nothing more to it.”
A much more poised Lizzie emerged from the bathroom and headed back to the ballroom. One more deep breath and she stepped into the throng searching for Charlie, or Maya, neither of them in sight. Turning to go in the opposite direction, she almost collided with Jack.
“Ammm Elizabeth, I was wonderin, would ye care tae dance? Wi me, I mean.”
JACK
The surprise that Jack felt matched the surprise on Elizabeth’s face when they both realised she had said yes. To dancing. With him. A little flustered he was able to at least offer his arm to lead his startled partner out onto the dancefloor. All he could do was gulp, avoiding her eyes as he stiffly slid his hand to the small of her back, taking her other hand and hoping that she didn’t notice his trembling fingers.
As they rocked like two gawky teens with a balloon stuck between them jack couldn’t stop his thoughts from running wild. He’d been in a state from the moment Elizabeth had walked in and slipped off her coat. In his wildest dreams he’d never imagined her in that dress. The gold sequined number had been designed to turn her into a goddess, complete with plunging neckline and a hemline that made his mouth run dry. He’d fought his attraction to the woman from day one but the surge of lust that ran through his body at the sight of her nearly did him in. As it was he was barely able to manage a nod, afraid that the croak in his voice would give away what was happening in his trousers.
In another life maybe.
Distracted and barely paying attention to the conversation around him his eyes had followed her, seeing her obvious embarrassment with her family. When he’d seen her at the bar with a drink he’d almost gone over but Charlie had beaten him to it. A few Google searches had informed him that Elizabeth’s medication and alcohol did not mix and he was glad she hadn’t drunk it.
His mind had wandered at that point as he imagined himself walking over there, welcomed by a cheeky, secret glint in her eyes. Running with it he pictured them laughing as he led her through the lobby and into a dark, quiet corner. In his fantasy she moaned when he kissed her, pulling him against her as she leaned back against the wall. She chuckled low in her throat when his hand slid up her thigh, hitching her leg over his hip as he ground against her. He could hear her voice in his ear, a breathless sigh of want and promise as he in turned whispered all the things he wanted to do to her when they were alone.
Jerked out of his dream world by a question he hadn’t even noticed he saw Elizabeth watching him from across the room and his cheeks reddened. If she’d had any idea what he’d been thinking she would have no doubt slapped him so hard his head would spin.
He didn’t see Colin approach until it was too late to do anything that wouldn’t cause a scene. Despite himself, jack felt a surge of pride as he watched her stand her ground, the look on Colin’s face priceless as she left him with her head held high. He shouldn’t have cared, shouldn’t have wanted. But he did and his feet seemed to move of their own accord to the entrance of the ballroom in time to see Elizabeth disappear into the loo. Colin was nowhere to be seen, but Jack wouldn’t have put it past him to follower in there so he placed himself within view of the door, just in case.
It was the deer in headlights look when she came out that prompted to move towards her, no plan at all in his mind. Now here they were. All silence and bungling, each of them looking anywhere but at the other. Jack didn’t know what to say that wouldn’t embarrass her and he was far too well aware of his previous inappropriate thoughts. What could he say?
“Awkward silence much?” he heard her remark quietly.
“Do ye prefer tae talk while dancin then?”
A chuckle.
“Generally, yes. Even if its just to comment on the sucky song. It’s only polite.”
“I confess I never really thought about it tae be honest.”
“Perhaps it’s time you did.” Elizabeth said archly as the song ended.
Taking the chance, Jack grinned, the next song starting before she could make an escape.
“Then I’ll say I quite like this one.”
“Bee Gees? Well at least you have some taste.”
“Saturday Night Fever was a cinematic masterpiece.”
“Never saw it.”
There was a hint of steel in her voice, a challenge and he vaguely remembered the party in the summer, the inference that Elizabeth had at least once loved to dance. Without a second thought he moved, spinning her out to the end of his arm before tugging her back, a moment spent flush against each other before he dipped her down almost to the floor.
She was looking at him now, her eyes wide with surprise as she followed his lead perfectly.
“Channeling your inner Tony Manero?” she questioned as they came together.
“Everything but the strut lass, and I thought ye said ye’d never seen it.” he laughed as he spun her again.
They were silent for a moment, their steps in perfect sync. The woman could dance, that was for sure. He got the feeling that it wasn’t something she did often and he felt a momentary spike of malicious satisfaction that Wick probably hadn’t had this opportunity.
“I understand ye all haf been seein a lot of Bradley Wick.” he knew he’d put his foot in it the moment the words left his mouth. The flash in her eyes confirmed what he had feared.
“He’s been helping my parents with the house, he needed the extra money. They are quite fond of him.”
“Aye, Wick has a talent of makin himself useful when it suits him, it doesna stay that way though.”
Spin out, tug in, her body against his, an angry spark in her eye. He was up for the challenge.
“I’m sure that the loss of your friendship has shaped your opinion of that. Do you think that just because you couldn’t be friendly that he can’t make friends at all?”
“He’s always been able tae make friends luv, he’s jus no good at keepin em.”
“Hmmm.” she appeared to be thinking as they moved. “I’m assuming something serious happened between you?”
“Ye assume correctly.” but he would be damned if he told her what.
“And it had nothing to with, oh say, jealousy or pride?”
He felt his eyes narrow, not at all comfortable with the direction this was taking.
“Why are ye askin?”
Elizabeth shrugged, spinning under his arm and around his back. He felt her hand across his waist like fire, her cold challenge sparking something in him.
“I’m just trying to understand you, I hear so many different things about you, almost like you’re two people.”
“Maybe ye should jus come straight tae the source.”
“Where’s the fun in that? You would only show me what you wanted me to see and I far prefer the truth.”
The truth? Did she really want to know the real man? The one who drank too much and had at one point gone through women like socks, the one who still thought she was no good for him despite how much he wanted her.?
“Now is probably no the best time tae be attemptin tae sketch my character.”
The song was ending, his hopes that the dance would turn into more fading by the note. She was baiting him and he couldn’t help but respond. He couldn’t help himself around her, she met him challenge for challenge and he wasn’t sure he would be the one to come out on top. He wasn’t sure who was the conqueror anymore.
“If I don’t do it now I’ll never get another chance.”
Her words hit him hard hard. After tonight there was no reason for him to stay in town so she was right. He was going home, never to return. Why was it bothering him so much?
The final notes of the song, Jack dipped Elizabeth down, never taking his eyes from hers, noticing the way her pupils dilated and her breath hitched. He allowed a smile to spread across his face. They stayed that way as the music changed, Jack slowly easing back until she was pressed against him again, so close he could feel her ragged breath on his neck while his heart hammered in his chest. Apparently neither of them wanted to be the first to break eye contact, to admit weakness of any kind to the other.
I certainly wouldn’t wan tae leave ye wantin Elizabeth, but in this regard I’m afraid ye’ll jus be disappointed.” Her eyes flared, lips parted to respond. ‘Unless….” he murmured as he started to move his hand on her back, pulling her closer.
“Lizzie! My dear look at you, I haven’t seen you dance for an age.” Mr Lucas had pushed through the crowd, breaking the spell with his booming voice.
Elizabeth took a step back, the familiar mask of indifference settling over her features.
He already missed her. Damn it!
Lucas clapped him on the shoulder, oblivious to the tension he’d inadvertently dissipated.
“Should have known such a handsome young man could bring our Lizzie out of her shell again. I’m sure we’ll be seeing a lot more of it when a certain wedding takes place.”
The appalled look on Elizabeth’s face and the direction of Lucas’ gaze was enough for Jack to figure out what was being inferred. Maya sat, looking down demurely as Tom leaning in, speaking into her ear.
Was that what everyone was thinking and expecting? He turned back to Elizabeth, only to see the back of her head as she walked away. Jack wracked his brain, trying to figure out how there was a wedding expected. Tom was obviously enamored with Maya but he did have a habit falling in and out of ‘love’ with remarkable swiftness. Grudgingly he admitted that Tom seemed somewhat different this time, but surely things hadn’t gone that far.
He was angry suddenly, or perhaps not so suddenly. The conversation with Elizabeth had stirred his unrest, knowing that she was friendly with Wick just rubbed him the wrong way. Knowing that there was gossip, that he was being judged based on whatever the bastard had decided to say about him. He was pissed that she had essentially confirmed that Wick was yet again running his mouth. It wasn’t her fault, many a woman had fallen for his lies, he just didn’t want it to be her, surely her attempt to talk to him had been her not accepting Wick at face value.
With a sigh he downed another glass of whiskey. Everything was completely fucked up and tonight was just it.
He was done.
LIZZIE
The frigid outside air was a blessing against her burning cheeks. She gulped in a few deep breaths, trying to calm her hammering heart. That, that had been unexpected. Anger mingled with desire and her brain, as well as her body was on fire.
From a dance.
A dance that included an argument. Lizzie had no idea what the hell was going on with her. She couldn’t stand the man, hadn’t wanted to dance with him. The only reason that she’d even agreed was because Colin had her so befuddled. Her hackles had been up and she was furious at the way her body had betrayed her the moment Jack’s hand settled on her back.
That was why she tried to bait him, started a fight to distract herself from everything she was feeling. Especially when that song came on, one of her favorites and Jack had pulled out the moves. Excluding everything else the man was good and a long forgotten excitement had begun to swell. Once, before Colin, she had loved to dance. Charlie had convinced her to take lessons with him when they were in high school and it had been love. All through college they had taken every chance they could to seek out Chicago’s speakeasies and dance the night away. Colin’s jealousy had ended that.
Tonight, with Jack, the excitement had come flooding back and she hated that it was with him. As much as she was pissed at the direction her thoughts had taken when he’d dipped her down with such smooth skill. The clean smell of him, his warmth through the crisp cotton of his shirt, the strength in the way he’d held her, they had all combined in her head. In that moment her imagination had run wild and all she could see was him, shirt and hair all rumpled as he pressed her against a wall, hands and lips roaming.
The realization had shocked her to the core, not so much the attraction - she’d already admitted to that. It was the knowledge that in that moment she wanted to lift her head those few inches closer, press her mouth against his and see what happened. Her body was completely betraying her, ignoring everything that she knew about the kind of man he was.
The argument had served its purpose, reminded her why she hated him. His casual dismissal of Brad infuriated her, the fact that despite that she was still attracted to him made her even angrier with herself.
Mr Lucas’ interruption couldn’t have come at a worse moment. The look on Jack’s face had effectively cleared her head, telling her everything she needed to know about his thoughts. She’d had to walk away before she called him out in public for being such an ass.
“Nice job out there twinkle toes.”
Lizzie managed a smile as Charlie wrapped his arms around her.
“Pity about the partner though.”
“I don’t know, he looked like he knew what he was doing.”
“Yeah he always knows exactly what he’s doing.” she said bitterly.
“What is it with him anyway? I mean I know he’s been around a lot, I thought there was….you know.”
Ew, god no Charlie! Trust me he hates me as much as I loathe him.”
“Coulda fooled me.” he muttered, side eyeing her.
“I told you what he did to Brad and you’ve seen the way he acts around here.”
“Ok I agree that the whole Brad thing was a bit low, but also normal for a cutthroat world like that. But come on Liz, let’s face it, he’s cute and all but only a fool would turn down all that Jack has to offer.”
“Consider me a fool then, besides you know I don’t care about all that crap. I don’t give a shit what he does for a living or how much he makes doing it - a jerk is a jerk.”
“Real shame the jerk is so hot though.”
“Yup, that’s a hard truth.”
“Come on, let’s go back in there and have some fun, fuck the rest of them.”
Charlie had a way of making her feel better and of putting things in perspective. He was blunt and pragmatic, funny and comforting, everything she needed to see things more clearly. She would have been lost without him.
Halfway through their dinner, after a few hours of dancing, someone grabbed Charlie’s attention and he was off again leaving her alone at the table. She could see Maya sitting with Tom a few tables over, a smile on her face as they talked some of his friends. Her mother and father sat with the Lucas’ and some other people they knew from town, Chloe’s voice carrying as she talked of her various maladies.
“Enjoying the party Eliza?”
Lizzie almost cringed as Caro sat down beside her, her perfume wafting, boobs spilling out of her dress.
“It’s been okay so far.” she shrugged nonchalantly.
“Listen, I hear that you’ve been getting quite friendly with Brad Wick.”
“And?”
“Well I should warn you that he’s not exactly a great guy.”
“Really?” Lizzie tried her best to sound bored. “How so?”
“I don’t know the particulars, but I do know something nasty went down between him and Jack and Jack was in no way to blame. But honestly, considering he grew up in a home, what else can you expect?”
“I assume you got your information from Jack?”
“Not entirely, there are some rumors swirling, but Eliza I wouldn’t trust him.”
Anger flared again, what the fuck was it with these people? Why did they find it so easy to try and ruin the lives of others? What made them think they were supposedly so much better than everyone else?
“Well Caro, it really isn’t any of your business. Besides it sounds like the only thing he’s done wrong in your eyes is grow up rough, and he already told me all about that.”
Lizzie saw the woman stiffen, obviously surprised at her audacity.
“I’m sorry, I was just trying to help.”
“I don���t need your kind of help, I’m a big girl and I make my own decisions about people.”
Caro didn’t say another word, just stood up and left. Lizzie let go an exasperated breath, suddenly tired and wanting to go home.
“Are you ok?” Maya was beside her looking concerned.
“I’m fine, I’ve just had enough of these people.”
“I saw Caro over here, what was that about?”
“She wanted to ‘warn’ me about Brad, I told her to fuck off.”
“Lizzie…” Maya started cautiously, “ I asked Tom about him and he said that Brad wasn’t a good guy.”
“Oh Maya, not you too. Besides has Tom even really met him, outside being on set?”
“No, I don’t think so.”
“Then he’s getting all his information from Jack, who has a very personal problem with him!”
“I didn’t even think that you liked him like that.”
“I don't. I just….I just hate the way that they all act like he’s done something wrong without having any proof. It’s not fair Maya.”
Maya sighed, obviously torn between her support of her sister and her affection for Tom. Lizzie hated that she had put her sister in the middle of it.
“It’s ok, I’ll be fine. I think Colin just got me all worked up.”
“Speaking of which….”
Lizzie followed Maya’s gaze to where Colin stood behind Jack’s seat, tapping him on the shoulder.
“That’s not going to end well.”
From the stony look on Jack’s face as he turned, it hadn’t even begun well. Despite everything, she was sort of rooting for Jack to put Colin firmly in his place. The man was a born sycophant and Jack was the biggest fish in the room, it would give her a perverse satisfaction to see him firmly put in his place by the younger man.
“Colin has forgiven Lizzie for everything, she just had cold feet. Honestly I wouldn’t be surprised if the wedding is back on in a few months.”
Lizzie’s head turned in horror at the sound of her mother’s voice as it carried across the tables.
“Between that and Maya, both the girls will be very well off indeed and set up to help Lydia too. Everything is working out exactly as I had hoped.”
Both girls had burning cheeks, Lizzie could see both Jack and Tom staring, Colin looking smug. She felt sick, she had to leave. Out of her chair, she managed two steps before her father came into her line of sight making a beeline for the dancefloor. Lydia was there with some kid from school, grinding against him while his hands roamed all over her. Ben walked straight over, grabbing her sister’s arm and leading her away while she cussed up a storm.
The humiliation was complete. She was done.
“I’m going home.” she hugged Maya. “Go back to Tom and act like nothing happened ok.”
Maya nodded, walking away.
Lizzie kept her head held high as she stalked out, grabbing her coat. She walked home despite the cold, refusing the offer of an Uber. Once locked inside she quickly stripped off her dress and jewelry, leaving everything in a pile on the floor. Her makeup was washed off as she stared blankly into the mirror, trying to hold it together. It wasn’t until after she climbed into bed, pulling the covers up around her head that she finally broke down and cried herself to sleep.
JACK
Jack honestly couldn’t believe what had just happened. Seriously couldn’t even begin to fathom how the night had taken such a turn. What an absolute clusterfuck. After the dance with Elizabeth everything had gone downhill so quickly, he’d been so distracted by what Lucas had said that he hadn’t seen the impending disaster unfolding.If he hadn’t so busy watching Tom and Maya, he would have seen Caro pounce on Elizabeth before she came stomping back to the table calling her a stuck up bitch. Then he’d been listening to her go on and on that he hadn’t even realized that Colin Ryan was right behind him until the creepy cunt was tapping him on the shoulder and going on about how he worked for Ann De Bourgh's L.A office and was hoping Jack would consider him for his U.S publicity.
The sheer nerve of the man had Jack in shock and he’d barely managed to shoot the man down with any politeness at all. That he would even consider asking him, given his history with Elizabeth and the current situation spoke to the audacity of the man. Then he heard the mother’s voice and saw the smug look on Colin’s face. It was then that he looked over at Elizabeth where she sat with Maya, hating the look of humiliation he saw on both their faces. He knew every word was bullshit, but he couldn’t believe how tone deaf Chloe Bennett was to her daughter’s feelings. Or how determined she apparently was to get her daughters ahead in the world.
He saw Elizabeth get up to leave and he took a step toward her, watching her falter as her father practically dragged Lydia off the dance floor. While he couldn’t blame the man for trying to protect his underage daughter, his method caused a scene that could have been avoided. The whole thing could have been avoided if the girl had any discipline at all, she wasn’t an idiot but she was very much out of control. He could almost feel the embarrassment that Elizabeth was experiencing, it was radiating from her and he was more than a little chuffed with the way she kept her head held up as she left.
He wanted to follow her, but he knew he couldn’t, not after everything that had happened. He was probably the last person she would accept comfort from right now. Still he struggled, hating himself as he watched her go, the haunted look on her face something he wasn’t soon going to forget.
“I suppose things didn’t get too out of hand tonight.” Caro sneered sarcastically. “I mean most of the natives have behaved themselves, except for the Bennets. God what a nightmare those people are.”
Jack merely grunted, unwilling to give her satisfaction of agreeing. Apart from the behavior of those three the night had been a surprising success, not that he really gave a shit.
He was expected to remain, so he did, keeping a close eye on things. Lydia spent the rest of the night sulking in a chair beside her father. Chloe Bennet quieted down, thankfully, but her earlier words still rang in his ears. Tom and Maya were inseparable as always and he took special notice of them. They looked happy enough, but she had withdrawn, he smile not quite reaching her eyes. He wondered if Maya was being pushed toward Tom by her mother. Sure she liked him but to his eyes not nearly as much as Chloe seemed to be implying. The question was, how far would she allow herself to be pushed and how much would that damage Tom?
Biding his time he waited until the party wound down before returning to the suite to wait for his friend. Tom walked in, on a cloud, Caro following behind him looking disapproving. That was fine, he thought, he could use her help for this.
“After Thanksgiving Maya and are going to take off for a few days, maybe up to Michigan.” Tom was prattling on and Jack knew he had to step in now.
“Don’t ye have those auditions next week?”
“I’m sure I can reschedule.”
“And if ye canna? What will ye do then? That's no a professional way tae act.”
“There’ll be other roles, Jack.” Tom looked crestfallen that his mate wasn’t as happy for him as he would have liked.
“Ye know as well as I do that's no true.”
“Well I don’t care, Jack. I’m happy.”
“And ye were happy wi Sandra, and then mel, until ye weren’t.”
“It’s different with Maya.”
Caro snorted, rolling her eyes and Jack leveled her with a glare.
“Ye always say tha, mate. Ye fall in an out o love all the time. It’s no worth risking yer career fer.”
Jack saw the first flicker of doubt on Tom’s face and he knew he was getting through to him. Swallowing his conscience he kept at it. He didn’t want his friend to get hurt.
“Look Tom, I donna doubt that ye care abou the girl, an she’s lovely, but ye barely know her.”
“It’s been three months!”
“And after four months with Mel it was over remember?”
“Because Mel only wanted one thing, Caro. You know she was only using me to get an inside track on roles.”
“And Maya’s mum is pushin her at ye fer fame and money too. Ye heard her tonight.”
The trap was sprung and Tom had walked right into it. His face told the whole story, anger, doubt and hurt.
“Maya’s not like that.”
“I’m no sayin she is.” Jack admitted truthfully. “Maya’s a nice, sweet girl but how vested is she in this and how much of it is her mum’s manipulation?”
“It’s….I’m….she’s….” Tom was yammering and though Jack was feeling guilty he squashed it quickly. He was doing the right thing and Tom would see that in the long run.
“God, what am I going to do?” Tom sighed, sinking into a chair.
“I can get us all on a flight to London by 7am.” Caro piped up.
“That would mean leaving now.” Tom looked shocked. “That’s a low route to take.”
“Do ye wan tae drag it out? Sit at a dinner table with the whole family knowing ye’re goin tae break it off?”
“No, I suppose not, but Maya deserves better than a disappearing act.”
“Then text her, send an email, but draggin it out is only goin tae complicate things. A clean break is best, no harm no foul.”
Silence. With a nod Jack indicated to Caro that she should book the flight and then he went to pack.
There was a feeling relief knowing he was leaving this place behind him and returning to the familiar. He had a break until January before he was expected at a job in Italy and then in L.A for February and March. Spending most of that time at home in Scotland seemed like the best idea to get his head straight. A picture of Elizabeth presented itself in his thoughts and he tried to shake it away. He would soon forget that she had ever existed, or at the very least she would just be the memory of a pretty girl he’d failed to shag.
Tom didn’t say a word to anyone, not as they packed or as the car drove them to O’Hare. He looked miserable but resigned and Jack was sure that he would be back to his old self in no time. The boy always bounced back quickly and this time would be no different. Maya would be fine too, he was sure of that. She would be hurt at the way they had left yes, but with them gone her mum would stop pushing her and she could just get on with her life. Every time his thoughts turned to Elizabeth he pushed them away, what she did now was none of his concern, whether it be with Wick, or Colin, or no-one.
The bile rose in his throat and he swallowed against it, turning to look out the window. As the plane sped down the runway and began to ascend he thought about London and all the reasons he had to never come back here. And as the plane rose higher, the Chicago skyline receding from view, he pulled down the shade and closed his eyes, willing himself not to dream of a woman that he would never see again.
#jack x reader#jack lowden#jack lowden blurb#jack lowden fanfiction#jack lowden fic#pride and prejudice au
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Crimes of Grindelwald info dump
CAREFUL : SPOILERS ! There’s no structure to this I’m sorry
the humor is still very present. from newt’s awkward flirting skills to Jacob’s tell-tale high-pitched screams, it’s all here and guaranteed to bring a smile to your face.
seeing Hogwarts again was a great plus as well. Dumbledore as a teacher is a great thing.
Speaking of which Jude Law makes a perfect young Dumbledore. His performance is great, and I wish he’d had more screentime. I’m looking forward to seeing his role grow in further movies.
Credence is GROWING and that’s GREAT even if he MAKES MISTAKES
the baby nifflers - and as a matter of fact, all creatures - are delightful. the CGI is very well-done, and the creativity behind each of them is palatable. I love those guys so much.
Newt and Tina are actually adorable as fuck
Dan Fogler is great. Scratch that, he steals the show. He’s brilliant.
The cinematography, costumes, etc - all that is great as well. it’s believable.
in terms of acting… none of the actors get much screentime. Queenie & Jacob do get some emotional scenes. Credence is very busy making angry murder faces at the camera. I liked Tina as well, but again - not enough screentime.
there’s a lot of new characters being introduced, some who get no more than perhaps ten minutes of screentime as a whole (looking at you Nagini.) We get this whole building plot about Credence being Leta’s long-lost brother, thought dead, only to have it crumble in the last minutes - the same as it was with Credence’s sister Modesty in the first movie who we thought was the Obscurus. Now that worked actually well in FB1 but here it feels… kind of anticlimactic? Leaving you to wonder the whys and the hows because nothing led up to it.
I’d like to know how Credence came to know Nagini and how he found himself working in a circus, as well as how he survived. How?!
Nagini and Credence seem to be close friends, nothing more. Which is good - he could use some good friends, especially given the direction he’s taking. Just wish Nagini had more screentime to really show up the mechanics of their relationship and how close they are, because it really isn’t clear. We’re just supposed to take at face value that they know each other and that’s it.
How did Credence even find his adoption papers? Isn’t he being wanted by every government in the world? How does his status work?
They’re literally sending assassins after him because he’s supposedly Grindelwald’s greatest weapon, which like… chill a bit guys maybe. Rethink this through???
Oh, Grindelwald. Grindelwald is grooming Credence like hell, calling him “my boy” again and again and hugging him and touching him and making promises and Credence is falling for it hook, line and sinker. Someone help him holy shit.
One of the characters that actually does make sense is actually Abernathy. His role is minimal but he does help Grindelwald escape and seems to be given tasks of importance - which seems to be a great deal for a man who, like him, appeared to be no one before. It’s easy to see how he could have been seduced to Grindelwald’s side.
We don’t know much about Rosier yet. She’s just here. Looking pretty and threatening and hinting at her ‘close relationship’ with Grindelwald, whatever that means (I don’t want to think about it.) She seems to be his second-in-command.
I liked the fact that at the end Grindelwald and Queenie are like bros. Bitch bros. That’s wonderful and terrifying.
I didn’t say it enough, but the grooming
There were so many times. So many times where they could have mentioned Percival Graves and what happened to him in passing but not only once. NoT OnLy oNcE
but that’s a whole other headache SO. moving on
Hmmm Leta. What to say about Leta? She’s great. She seems like a good person, and Zoé did a great job portraying her. She’s the one who gets the most emotional scenes, next to Jacob and Queenie. There’s a whole family drama unfolding here (which oooh boi is it complicated) and it’s kind of easy to see how she became the woman she is?
She and Theseus seem to love each other very much. I’m wishing they had had more screentime, the two of them.
Nicolas Flamel is here for comic value.
I loved the relationship between Theseus and Newt. There’s some real brotherly love and character growth in there, and it felt good to see it depicted well.
I’m wondering how powerful that assassin sent by the british minister needed to be to resist the full-blown assault of a grown obscurus. even Grindelwald had trouble doing that. where’s the logic ???
also how did they obliviate the entire city of Paris following that little trick with the dark cloaks inviting people to Grindelwald’s little rendez-vous? Unless it was visible only to wizards, but since they show us an old intrigued man looking out the window I don’t think it was the case. So?
Same thing with the blue fires and red fires in the cemetery - how’re they gonna explain that to the muggle police and fire brigade should they come running?
Bunty is here for comic value.
Newt literally isn’t aware of his own appeal. I’m afraid oblivious!Newt from the fics is sorta canon now.
TINA DOESN’T GET ENOUGH SCREENTIME. She’s one of the characters who, along with Jacob, seems to have her shit together and seems eager to get shit done but we don’t see her progress. The movie prefers to focus on her relationship with Newt - which, don’t get me wrong, they’re adorable as fuck - instead of the much more interesting investigation plot line she has got going on. She’s an Auror; let her be an Auror ! Show us that side of her !
Queenie was certainly… something in this movie. I get the feeling she’s suffering a lot and Grindelwald is the only one, unfortunately, who listens.
Jacob the poor guy goes through a lot in this one too. I don’t know how he’s expected to survive in a world he really shouldn’t be in, and I think he’s starting to realize that. At the end of the movie he looks to be on the verge of a breakdown.
Leta dies sacrificing herself so the others can escape. Which is very noble but… I don’t know how I feel about that one just yet.
Grindelwald and Dumbledore… Hmm. Dumbledore shows us his suffering intimately. It’s a short but intense scene that goes one with him in front of that mirror and it’s a great piece of acting. Seeing Johnny Depp in front of him stiiiiill doesn’t cut it but oH WELL
Seeing Jamie morph into JD was about as bad as seeing Colin Farrell morph into him tbh. It’s unbelievable.
Now Grindelwald… Grindelwald is… He is Grindelwald. He is busy being Grindelwald. He’s not particularly striking but he gets the job done. That’s it.
Sometimes he looks terrifying and sometimes he looks ridiculous. The character design is still a hard pill to swallow.
I got the feeling at some points that Grindelwald worked well when he was doing some Johnny Depp. Like when he asks Queenie if Credence trusts him or when he says “I hate Paris” after killing a dozen people at the end of his rally - that was funny. Unexpected. And it worked well.
For someone who claims they are the non-violent ones he does seems very prone to like, drowning people, killing children and burning people with fire lol - but all that away from the public eye, which is clever. I’d say in Grindelwald’s and his followers’ opinion that rally worked very well. It did what it was meant to - give them an insight into his hopes and beliefs and then scare them into joining his side.
They introduced World War II which, oh boi. Wonder how they’re gonna weave the muggle history and wizarding world plotline together.
Credence joining him also makes sense for his character. He wants to know who he is and Grindelwald offers him that. But Grindelwald plays him so well it’s also very sad to watch it unfold.
Credence is gonna be so powerful growing under his tutelage though.
The actors playing young Newt and Leta were awesome! Very good casting, very believable. Young Newt’s got Eddie Redmayne’s trademark Newt mannerisms down to a point - congrats to them both!
Newt the adult… well he is busy being Newt. He’s quite cute and clumsy, but he still has some growth to do as a protagonist. I like him being the main character though. He’s caring.
Yusuf Kama doesn’t get much screentime either. He’s part of the whole Lestrange family drama plotline. We don’t have time to get attached to the character.
We don’t relate much to any character, actually. Not to Credence, not to Dumbledore, not to any minor new character either. We might relate slightly to Newt’s rivalry with his brother or his difficulties in approaching the woman he likes as well as the difficulties Jacob and Queenie are facing as a couple buuuut that’s pretty much it.
There’s a scene at the beginning when we’re in the carriage and Grindelwald gets illuminated by lightning - he looks properly terrifying. My heart skipped a beat.
Newt and Leta’s relationship is really touching. It’s easy to see how they could have become close friends.
The Ministry trying to recruit Newt into the auror department like you seriously thought that was gonna work ? lmao
Jacob being charmed by Queenie is problematic…. but it’s interesting to see how Queenie evolves, how she could be driven to such desperations. In my opinion Jacob is a bit too quick to forgive something like this lol but yK
Newt just wants to get to Tina and that’s cute
God these two are just terribly awkward
I genuinely thought they were gonna kiss at one point though.
I felt bad for Credence seeing the servant who was a link to his family (or maybe not ahaa SPOILER) die like minutes after he met her. the poor dude.
So Credence is a Dumbledore uh. Wonder how that one skipped past Rita Skeeter’s sharp quill.
Credence blasting that hole in the mountain like YEAH BABY THERE YOU GO !!!!!
The niffler steals the blood pact Grindelwald keeps on him at all times and im like YES BABY THERE YOU GO TOO !!! GOOD BOY !
and idk there’s probably more to say but here you go
Now I’m saying all this but personally I have a really hard time caring about anything I’m saying or any of the characters. But that’s personal.
#crimes of grindelwald spoilers#tcog spoilers#fb spoilers#fb2 spoilers#fbtcog spoilers#juTS SPOILERS IN GENERAL OKAY#thanks bye#i kinda really want to try to do an articulated review like a movie critic though#but i dont care#slljdksfhsjfjsdf
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New Look Sabres: 2019 Free Agency
The wise words of noted NHL insider Elliotte Friedman go “When you’re drowning in this league other teams don’t throw you a life jacket, they throw you an anchor.” In spite of a handful of decent to great players getting traded in the last few weeks for peanuts, generally speaking it’s very hard to pull off a trade that is a lopsided win for your team. Free Agency is worse. Free Agency is like opening a septic tank looking for a diamond ring and jumping in expecting not to get covered in shit. The last big Free Agency signing the Sabres pulled off was Kyle Okposo. All the off-ice stuff you want to say about the Sex Man aside: that contract sucks ass. It was bad the moment it was signed. That’s what most free agency signings are like. Jason Botterill approaches this offseason publicly saying he wants to focus more on the trade avenue. That’s smart. I’d prefer he not give out too much money in free agency like his predecessor did with Okposo. However we are a fanbase that has run out of patience eight years out of the playoffs. Significant roster moves are paramount right now. How we got here is actually pretty simple. The tank worked (let’s not relitigate it) and rebuild 1.0 was accelerated by Tim Murray with the Ryan O’Reilly and Evander Kane signings at the cost of a wave of prospects and picks. Rebuild 1.0 failed. That failed initial rebuild was what brought Kyle Okposo here as a free agent. He’s now our very own salary cap albatross circling in the skies above the nearly dead Buffalo Sabres that were so stripped down in the tank they’re aimless even with some talent on the roster. We’ve all run out of patience. Rebuild 2.0 under Jason Botterill has gone better but, and this is a big but, the second half collapse of last season was decisive. It ended Phil Housley’s coaching career in Buffalo, and it burned a lot of the fan goodwill Jason Botterill had held onto through the legendarily bad season that earned us Rasmus Dahlin. Another bad season probably costs Botterill his job. This is the situation that gave birth to the buzzword of Sabres twitter: “Roster Surgery”. Bill Schake analyzed it best. Chad DeDominicis’ right hand man essentially said roster surgery is a great way to put it because there is so few tradeable assets left on this team it will take some cunning, creative moves to make real change. It’s truly surgery of the roster because its hard. It’s going to be harder than it’s ever been in the Eichel Era this summer to make this team look competitive past Valentine’s Day. So what changes do we have to talk about as we enter the long, dull portion of the NHL hockey calendar?
Well… Rasmus Ristolainen was the one big tradeable asset I was alluding to… and this past weekend… the Sabres signed Marcus Johansson. Ok so, the trade we’ve been waiting for didn’t happen before the posting of this article. Lord knows it will after this goes up and I’ll have to wait until the Offseason Retrospective to write about it. But let’s not poo-poo a great signing just because it’s not a trade we want. In fact, this specific blog is called 2019 Free Agency so let’s talk about Free Agents for a bit. Marcus Johansson, apart from adding yet another Swede to one of the most swede-heavy rosters in the National Hockey League, adds much needed left-wing depth to the top six. He’s considered a veteran at 28 and has only gotten to twenty goals twice in his nine seasons in the NHL. Nonetheless he was kind of the best guy left to add to the wing for the Sabres once July 1st came and went with pretty much only AHL-level moves. Johansson is defensively responsible and gets those zone entries which is something this team needs guys not named Jack Eichel to do better. Also he is apparently known for his versatility. He hasn’t played at center in recent seasons but that is a trick in the hat knowing Casey Mittelstadt may still not be ready for that 2C slot. That is the topic of some Sabres twitter debate but it seems rather immaterial right now to me with so much offseason left to go. The natural next topic of conversation here feels like it should be Jimmy Vesey and Colin Miller. However, those are technically trades although they were so well extracted they almost feel like signings. As I said earlier, I’m all for not giving up too much money in free agency, particularly if the team isn’t exactly “going for it” right now. So how about I rattle off the free agent signings Jason Botterill did make on July 1st in spite of most of them being long shots for the NHL roster: Goalie Andrew Hammond, Center Curtis Lazar, defenseman John Gilmour, Jean-Sebastien Dea and sorta Dalton Smith (Smith was an Amerk this past season and was resigning technically). Those first two guys are the ones you’re thinking of. Andrew Hammond was the “Hamburgler” in Ottawa a few seasons ago and Curtis Lazar was the guy who ate a hamburger off the ice during that same craze. Just like the Ottawa Senators both guys have not been all that good since. Hammond is the better of the two and is probably going to platoon it in net with Ukko Pekka-Lukkonen in Rochester this coming season. Lazar… is worth a shot I guess. John Gilmour was one of the better AHL defensemen for the Hartford Wolfpack last season and I’m told has the best chance of the group to make the big club. The other two guys I just don’t feel any need to talk about. That feeling is not because they’re minor league moves: you dipsticks complaining about the Front Office making moves mostly helping Rochester need to cool your jets and count your blessings! Take a good hard long look at that Okposo contract and then shut up!
I spent most of last year’s Free Agency article ranting about the Ryan O’Reilly trade. After how his season ended this year that whole conversation turned into a toxic waste dump a la your local minor league baseball franchise announcing a Pride Night on Facebook to absolutely terrible comments from the most bigoted boomers on the internet. I won’t be addressing O’Reilly because I feel we’ve done that to death. This is Buffalo Hockey though so of course there is another retread conversation fraught with potential toxicity to talk about: Jimmy Vesey. First things first, don’t hold three years ago against him. That move for his negotiating rights was the kind of stupid but exciting move that Tim Murray specialized in. That saga doesn’t matter now because Vesey is an established pro now and if we’re being totally real here the players don’t care. Jack Eichel is just happy to have another BU guy, I’m sure! Bury those bad takes next to your Leino jerseys. Nothing screams top line about Vesey’s game so don’t pencil him in right next to Eichel as if it’s a sure thing. I’ve heard him called a middle six acquisition which I think is a great way to put it. We’ll see what Training Camp holds for him. Colin Miller on the other hand you can definitely pencil in as a top four pairing defenseman. He isn’t clearly the best line mate for Rasmus Dahlin but he’s a strong candidate. His trade to Buffalo for a 2021 second round pick and a 2022 fifth round pick is Botts picking on a team in cap jail more than what you might call highway robbery. It’s kinda funny that team in cap jail is the Vegas Golden Knights but after the 2018-2019 St. Louis Blues happened I’m sure they’ll be back in the Final next year. On this team Miller is second only to Rasmus Dahlin on the defensive depth chart and top of the right-handed side of that chart. There are four right-handed defenseman who are NHL likely now beyond Miller: Brandon Montour, Zach Bogosian and Rasmus Ristolainen. The talk about a Ristolainen trade went up naturally after the Miller trade and yes, I’m still on the fence about it. I don’t need him gone, especially with a new coach coming in, but I don’t want 2022 to get here and everyone in the league know he’s ass and end up trading him for a couple of late round picks. If we’re going to get a king’s ransom for Ristolainen, it’s probably this summer or the 2020 trade deadline at the absolute latest. By the time you’re reading this the deal may already be done. Oh, I forgot to mention the Miller trade pissed off Leafs fans! I love pissing off Leafs fans. Fuck them, right?
So there it is: New Look Sabres 2019 Free Agency! Well… how about some fun signings not related to the Sabres? Even after the Leafs traded away Nazem Kadri for a decent to good defenseman there are still smart folks up there saying the Leafs are worse man-for-man compared to last year. Delicious! Robin Lehner openly declared his displeasure for how the Islanders let him go before signing with the Chicago Blackhawks. That’s interesting on two levels because the Isles probably aren’t done this offseason in a big way and Lehner now goes from a great defensive team on Long Island to a very porous defensive system in Chicago. We’ll see how it works out for him; I kinda want him to succeed still but one way or another we’ll see if last season was a fluke or not. Tyler Ennis singed with the Ottawa Senators. That maybe the one weirder jersey to see him in then Toronto. Finally Mike Smith goes from Flames to Oilers while Cam Talbot goes from Oilers to Flames. Should we call that Albertan Roulette? Bringing back home to Buffalo please like, share and comment on this blog. Get that hype going for the new season. I won’t be writing much on this blog until late August, but I think that’s okay because we all could use a break from Hockey. Also if you really want my Sabres takes you can always get them @UttaroSports on twitter. In the meantime, enjoy the summer! Let’s Go Buffalo!
Thanks for reading.
P.S. Linus Ullmark was among the Sabres who filed for salary arbitration. I could’ve used this PS to talk about Remi Elie electing for arbitration which is much more humorous but Ullmark is my boy, so I hope everything goes over well for him come these hearings in… August. Huh. Let the long summer begin!
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OUAT 3X21 AND 3X22 - “Snow Drifts” AND “There’s No Place Like Home”
Watch what happens when Miss Swan tries to EMMA-ncipate herself from Storybrooke!
Bwahahahahah!!!!
Anyways, let’s do the time warp agaiiiiiiiinn!
You better WATCH yourself because we’re going back to revisit the Season 3 finale below the cut! XD
I’m sorry this is so late! Super Smash Bros Ultimate kind of stole my life for a few weeks, but I’m back now!
Press Release
While Mary Margaret and David celebrate the naming of their son at a coronation in Granny’s Diner, Emma and Hook are pulled into Zelena’s time portal and find themselves in the Enchanted Forest of the past. But in their quest to discover a way back, they must be careful not to change ANYTHING or risk altering the lives of their friends and family – as well as their very own existence.
Main Thoughts - Characters/Stories/Themes and Their Effectiveness
Past/Present/Everything (?) XD
“Back to the Future” is my all time favorite movie, so is it any surprise that I fucking love this two parter? No? Well, good! Now let’s talk about why!
Revisiting this finale really shows me just how many story and plot points were set up in those first few minutes in such a natural way. This is easily one of the tightest finales in the show’s history in that regard. The story and plot here is so well paced. Never does anything, even for a second feel off or poorly spoken or anything of the sort! It’s just good! The absolute best instance of this is the two Hooks scene. Like, that was just so fucking CRAFTY for how Killian and Emma organize and enact the plan to get Snow to work for him.
I like how the opening of the episode finally lays out all the cards: Emma’s decision to go back to New York is a selfish one. She plainly admits this and spells out why. It’s framed as a bad thing to do and the episode’s goal is to tackle that. It’s the heart of the episode and it’s incredibly effective thanks to those opening shots that show just how much pain Emma’s been in throughout her past.
Oh my fucking God, all of the actors are just amazing here! EVERYONE gets a great moment! I talk a ton about Emma and Jen, obviously, so let’s give a shoutout to the others! Robert Carlyle gets to put all of Rumple’s delicious character aspects on display, from Rumple’s silliness to Mr. Gold’s snarkiness to both of their more sympathetic sides. Lana gets some fucking delicious ham as we see her Season 1 Evil Queen come out! Josh pulls off the perfect mix between being everything that Prince Charming is supposed to be with a more modern snark that makes him human. The same goes for Ginny, though the placement of this episode has Snow showing off a more believably cynical side to the character, which she nails! Jared Gilmore performs a fantastic Henry, understanding though still always tugging at Emma to come and stay home. Emilie de Ravin’s heart and soul during the wedding scene is just so present, so much so that I just feel myself bursting out in tears throughout the whole scene. And Colin, who boy! Colin had to take on two versions of himself and every moment of that was just delicious!
”Lovely ball the other night.” ...Is this to say that there was a day break between Emma being caught by Regina’s guards and being put in her cell? It makes sense, but WOW! I never thought of it like that!
The execution scene. The fucking kills me. I know Snow’s alive, but I don't fucking care. I still feel every bit of that sense of dread and disgust as the fireball takes her. And how that affects Emma, she can barely speak and when even the possibility of Snow being alive comes to light, Emma’s immediately back to full energy! Emma’s love for Snow is such an effective driving force behind the solving of her conflict of finding home. The moment that choked me up this time was Emma shouting “you’re alive” to Snow right before hugging her. Just...and then we have to sit on the reaction when Snow doesn’t recognize her. It’s just too much.
And Emma’s revelation. I love how slow and emotional the moment gets to be as she tells Killian why she wants to stop running and how she values her mother and life in Storybrooke. It’s so heartbreaking and heartwarming in the same vein. It’s this gentle breakdown that understands that yes, Emma has been selfish, but she wants to do and be better for everyone, including herself. She wants to be like the rest of her family. She wants to be a part of something. And the smile on hers and Killian’s face as she comes to terms with that lesson...it’s just the best kind of payoff! And then the reunion, accompanied by that GORGEOUS melody as Emma finally remedies her behavior towards her parents. It’s one of the most beautiful moments in the entire show.
So let’s talk about Baby Neal briefly, or rather, his name. This is one of the most contentious points in the entire fandom. I...don’t love it (but don’t hate it), but only because Snow and Charming didn’t interact with Neal all that much. Had they had any meaningful time together, I think this naming would’ve been not only good, but great. Even still though, I don’t really care too much one way or the other. I’m one of those people who is completely fine with kids on this show being named after the dead. Maybe that’s because it’s the case in so much of the other media that I’ve seen throughout my life and apart of the Jewish culture I grew up with, but I don’t understand the fandom’s hangup with that reason for names. People are named after the dead. It’s not that big of a deal.
Insights - Stream of Consciousness
-Guys, that is just cruel and unusual punishment to make all of the kids stand outside and watch a kid get adopted right in front of them. I get they’re trying to be polite and inspire hope, but they’ve GOT to know that that’s difficult for the non adopted kids to watch! Like, the actual fuck?!
-Dammit. The cameraman who kept the shot on Emma as she sees a kid driving off with a new family fucking is an evil genius and fucking WRECKS me! *sobs into infinity*
-Do you think Lucy had a coronation ceremony?
-Potluck at Granny’s, huh? I don’t know if that’s good because you’re thrusting less work onto Granny or bad because you’re denying her the business.
-Okay, I know Emma’s running away from her problems and all, but that retort about Snow and David stalling for time was fucking hysterical! XD
-Robin, that is one luxurious spread! But why are you guys sitting on the floor?! Don’t you know that Regina’s a queen and a bit more refined? XD
-”I would’ve walked through hell to be with my Marian again.” ...Dammit. I really want a Robin/Marian Underworld fic.
-”That [vault] was only for the most dangerous and unstable magic.” Then that sounds like a GREAT place for the dagger! “And this doesn’t qualify?” “No.” YES!
-To tell you the truth, I guess when you factor in both Rumple’s sacrifice AND the fact that he’s scary powerful, it makes sense that Maurice would bless the marriage. Like, he’s still a shit person, but the decision makes sense. I do feel though like they just stuck him in so that there was one extra person at the wedding, but I’d honestly think Ruby would’ve been a more appropriate choice since she was closer to Belle and even helped out Rumple on occasion, especially since she was actually in the episode.
-The entire back-and-forth about the origins of Snowing is the greatest thing in the world! XD
-KATHRYN! My sweet cinnamon roll!!! You look so happy and you’re talking with Best Matriarch!!! <3
-Okay! The Captain Cobra moment here is so fucking underrated! Henry trusts Killian with his fucking storybook! Like, this book just gave him back his memories and Henry trusts Killian with it to help his mom! Just...YES PLEASE!!!!
-”Stubborn like her...all of our family.” To be fair, have you MET your family, David? That correction is pretty accurate.
-”She would curb any homicidal tendencies.” ...I’m pretty sure that’s not how that works, mate!
-I love RC’s “oh shit” face.
-...To tell you the truth, now that we know Zelena survived, that corrupted footage isn’t that far off the mark.
-”You defeated the bloody Wicked Witch. You defeated Pan.” ...You’re not fully on the mark, Killian, but I do agree that she had a big part in taking them down.
-I LOVE THIS FUCKING MIRROR LAKE!
-Lana! Lana! There’s so much beautiful ham here and I love you for it!!! This scene where she’s intimidating the villagers! Just...this is perfection!
-BOOBS! I mean...Emma’s EF attire looks great! ...BOOBS! <3
-I just LOVE Emma’s smile as she watches the set up for her parent’s first meeting. Like, I legit reared up because that smile alongside the Snowing theme just...it was fantastic.
-”It’s a miracle you two fall for each other.” I love that ‘da fuq, Emma’ look Killian gives Emma.
-I love that look Killian gives Emma when he says “me.”
-...Damn, Killian looks good funny encased in shadows.
-And then he has to say “privacy” in only the way Killian Jones can do.
-”Ooh confidence. I like it.” And I like your confidence. ...Damnit, OUAT men! Stop being so attractive!
-Regina just ROCKS her every entrance!
-”It’s all about the tumblers.” I spell it differently, but I feel you, man. XD
-I love the way Neal describes his past with Rumple. The tragedy of their separation comes from the fact that they loved each other so much, but Rumple couldn’t overcome his demons in a way that could help them stay together.
-I LOVE this Captain Charming scene. The bros are so supportive of one another, though David doesn’t fully grasp who Killian is to him!
-”Who knows? Maybe you’ll end up with them again.” ...That hurrrrts!
-Ruby is such a badass!!!
-”Hook!” How strange must this nickname be to everyone else in this room?! XD
-*Snow sneaks up on Regina* Oh SNOW you didn’t!!! XD
-Aww! I love that Red Snow hug!!!
-You know, I really like the design of the trolls and am sad that they weren’t used more often.
-”I’m devilishly handsome again.” Yes you are!
-Gee! Is that urn important?
-I love both Rumple and Emma’s reactions to Neal’s name. That subtle happiness, especially on Rumple’s face, is just so beautiful!
-So I have so many feelings on Killian ‘ditching his crew.’ I actually wrote an entire fic about it. BUT that having been said, I think the choice he made was the right one.
-Archie, they’re getting married, not going ice skating. Wear a fucking suit!
-I can’t get as swept up in the OQ tragedy because Roland says “mama” and that is too fucking cute!
-Okay, that reveal of Elsa was SO FUCKING WELL SHOT! I love the slow buildup to her reveal, from the icy blue liquid in the urn to the forming of her dress to the shape of her hair to the dismissal of the liquid and finally, to the reveal of her powers! What an EPIC intro! Best one ever! Now I know you’re upset about that, Regina, but you just have to *takes deep breath* LET IT GOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO! (And THAT’S how you close out a season!)
Arcs - How Are These Storylines Progressing?
Emma Accepting Home - So look, I love how every season touches upon another aspect of Emma’s acceptance of people into her life, but on some level, I do get how the fandom got sick of it after a certain point. I firmly believe that this was the best and ultimate moment of culmination of this aspect of Emma’s character. That’s not to say that I didn’t like it in other seasons. Fuck no, I loved it in other seasons, but this was the best handling of it. The idea of those Emma loves and their philosophies on home and family all come together in this beautifully blended way. Emma’s parents, Henry, Killian, Neal, and more all contribute to her outlook on her life in Storybrooke and how her walls can be detrimental. And seeing Emma realize that makes for such a beautiful journey.
Killian’s Redemption - “That man sitting there, you don’t know him. Just be careful.” I feel like this line speaks to Killian’s improvement. He doesn’t want someone he cares for to see how lousy he was. And Killian’s redemption really gets its proper payoff here. With many of his past wrongs righted, Killian is finally given appreciation for helping get Emma back to Storybrooke. I think there’s an added layer to “you traded your ship for me.” Basically, Emma has to press him unyieldingly in order to find this out, meaning that he was never going to tell her on his own. He was willing to give up his home and have the act go anonymous.
Regina’s Redemption - ….Fuck. So, I’ve gone on about how I loved Regina’s Redemption this season. That is completely true. And this is where we take a GIANT step back. I GET that Regina feels resentment towards Emma. In this episode, it’s even at an okay level. BUT, going forward, this gives way to perhaps my least favorite Regina arcs. Thankfully, it only lasts for five episodes and I like the handling of it in the first four...you know what? We’ll talk about it when we get there! Apart from that aspect, I felt like Regina had reached a good place here! Her character is becoming more concrete.
Rumple’s Redemption - This is one of those episodes where Rumple’s decision to hide the real dagger and the truth about Zelena’s death makes things really sticky. And don’t forget, I was on his side for her death, but now’s the time to come forward! Apart from this aspect of it, something not at all glossed over in the episode itself, Rumple is framed as good. His wedding is a moment of character payoff and the happiness he feels as he gets married and Snowing’s son is named after Neal feels earned in a lot of ways. And the weirdest thing is that that’s Rumple for you: Undeniable someone with a big heaping helping of darkness, but a fuckton of character in there too. Like, this doesn’t ruin the episode by any means, but it’s there and it’s weird.
Neal’s Death - “Home is the place when you leave, you just miss it.” I think it was a fantastic story element to make one of the most poignant and thematically present lines in the episode something Emma learned from Neal. Not only that, but even some more of Neal’s minor advice comes in handy, like how to unlock the prison cell!
Favorite Dynamic
Emma and Killian. ...Look I work hard not to incorporate too much shipping into the meatier parts of the review and I’ll keep the romance out of it, I promise. So just give me this one. Cool beans? Cool beans. But seriously, I do actually have completely non-shippy reasons to love this dynamic as it works in this episode. For a time travel story to really work, there needs to be at the heart of it characters who know what’s going on and can interact with one another. It’s the most important dynamic in the story and if they fucked it up, the rest of the tale would’ve fallen apart, but thankfully, with Emma and Killian together, the special thrived. Killian and Emma both bring something to the table. Emma brings that fresh face and serves as a focal point for the story. Her naivete of some of the fairy tale elements and personal relationship to the people from the past is what keeps the story going and engaging. And Killian in a lot of ways helps to keep her grounded. While he cares deeply for Emma, his existence is not the one on the line and his lack of a familial relationship allows for some space between him and the events. He gets to be the clear thinker when Emma panics and her guide since this is his world as well as the voice of reason. And in return, Emma gets to perform the cool stunts, save people, and stand up to the past version of the Evil Queen. She even gets to save Killian’s ass in the case of royal balls and keeping his past self distracted. Together, they get to bounce around ideas, make jokes, and share moments of revelations that other characters in this episode aren’t and can’t be privy to. These two characters come together and make for a good and balanced dynamic for that reason. Additionally, Jen and Colin’s chemistry allows for a balance between things being lighthearted and serious when they need to be. Whether you like them as a couple or not, I don’t think it can be denied that they are the reason for why the main story was as entertaining as it was.
Writer
We have four writers here, two per episodes. David Goodman and Robert Hull worked on “Snow Drifts” and Adam and Eddy wrote “There’s No Place Like Home.” And they all did so freakin’ well! You can tell how careful these guys were with most every writing decision ever made. They managed to rework a fantastic episode, “Snow Drifts,” while still keeping to the dignity of it at the same time. It gels so well into also being a family story and allowing for as many fun character interactions as possible.
Rating
Double Golden Apple! What more can I honestly say? It’s as close to perfect as OUAT can get for me!
Flip My Ship - The Home of All Things “Shippy Goodness”
CAPTAIN SWAN, MOFOS! - THERE IS A REASON THIS BEAUTIFUL EPISODE IS CALLED THE CS MOVIE BECAUSE HOT DAMN IT IS A CS MOVIE!!!!! As I said in the “Favorite Dynamics” section, Killian is a constant source of support for Emma. He knows that she belongs with her family, respects her ideas, and challenges her. And just, let’s get through the moments, okay?! Like, he goes through a time portal for her! “One of these days, I’m gonna stop chasing this woman.” The fuck you are, buddy. You’re chasing her for all eternity! And just, he’s got her. He keeps her sane as she freaks out. He helps her relax. And just...the LOOKS he gives her! Like, look at how they joke around when Emma changes clothes, those little flirty looks! XD And speaking up, how about that loosening up of the corset and “you and I both know I’m his type?” Because that kills me. It utterly kills me! Someone drag my soul out of the Underworld because that scene destroys me in the best way possible! And the dude gets jealous of Emma kissing his past self, so fucking jealous that he needs to take his-fucking-self out! XD AND NOW WE GET TO THE BALL! THE FUCKING BALL THAT OWNS MY ETERNAL ASS! First, look at those smiles as Killian compliments Emma. THEN look at how Emma covers for Killian like a mofo’in boss! FINALLY, THE DANCING. IMMORTALIZED IN THE BOOK FOR ALL TIME IS MY FAVORITE CS MOMENT! EMMA GETS TO PLAY PRINCESS AND FEEL LIKE A ROYAL. KILLIAN GETS TO TREAT HER TO SUCH AND TEACH HER HOW TO WALTZ. AND THEY”RE SMILING AND HAVING SO MUCH FUN. IT”S PERFECT! HONESTLY PERFECT! Okay, I’m semi-recovered from that. Now, I also LOVE how Emma holds that ring to Killian and it looks just SO much like she’s proposing! And THEN “I’d go to the end of the world for her. Or time.” Just...you need to stop loving Emma so much because my heart cannot take it! And notice Emma’s smile when she says “Hook.” Then, we get an interesting callback to the Neverland Arc. When Emma asks Killian about his brother, Killian’s unwilling to talk about it, but here, knowing she needs that, he tells her what she needs to know. AND “I always knew there was a little pirate in you Swan.” She’s certainly getting there! And just...I love how Killian’s both harsh and gentle with Emma as she has her moment of realization. And THEN, Emma, after being with Killian for most of basically two or three days, goes out to see him again because he’s all alone! Just...the confession about giving up The Jolly Roger for love. I love how Killian never intended to reveal this and how Emma knows the weight of that choice. It just makes the subsequent kiss so satisfying!
Rumbelle - Oh yeah...There are other couples in this episode too! XD Sorry, but yes, I ADORED the Rumbelle in this episode. Like, in the past, I love how Rumple gets so embarrassed by Belle thinking that he talked about her and how he dismissed her. It’s so cute! And now, that wedding! That wedding! Just...what can I say about these vows? They’re perfect. The editing allows them to encompass every other couple while the lines are still completely their own and work perfectly for Rumbelle as a couple. Rumbelle is every other couple at their best and worst, a mix of best and worst traits and I feel like this wedding is a celebration of that fact. On a funnier note, I love how Rumple and Belle didn’t even wait for the fucking “I do’s” and just went at each other with a kiss!
Outlaw Queen - Robin and Regina’s office picnic is so adorable and honest and open and beautiful! Like, they put everything on the floor, emotionally speaking.
Robin/Marian - Talking about Marian is difficult when you know that she’s actually Zelena, but this episode allows for her mostly to be herself, allowing for an accurate take on her. And to tell you the truth, I like this couple in a lot of ways. I love how much Robin misses Marian and that while he has moved on from her death, still cares for her so deeply. And Marian adores Robin! As soon as she’s free, she basically says “fuck it” to the stipulations of her freedom in order to be with him and Roland. Their love for each other is such a subtle and prevalent thing!
Snowing - Okay, so before we get to the past, let me say that I LOVE all of the Snowing banter at Granny’s! You can just TELL that a couple’s truly great when they can just joke and bicker about how they met and they have that down in SPADES! And in the past, I love the care that went into re-making Snowing’s story, but in a way that was still true to the original version. Though Emma, Killian, and Rumple are pulling the strings, Snow and Charming’s love is so carefully made to be all their own doing and that was so important. And I love the mix of new and old content so much. The repetition of lines just shows how true Snow and Charming’s love really is! And honestly, there’s something so special about Snow and Charming’s daughter being the one to bring them together!
Golden Hook - ...There’s so much FOETP goodness in here. Just, those hate-filled looks in the forest, that suffocation, the quips about burying the hatchet! There has never been true hate in all the lands! <3 Also, when Emma asks about how Killian got his hook, Killian’s next response is to say that she knows “who he is.” This hook and it’s origins, Rumple, are who he is.
Swanfire - That amusement park date was too cute and I really love how Neal’s advice is something that sticks with Emma. It shows Emma’s nuance as a character, as she can accept good and bad things about Neal, even during periods of time where she hated him. And I legit fucking BAWLED when Emma was telling Rumple about how she loved Neal and how he was a hero. Like, just...don’t talk to me! That was too much!
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Again, I am SO sorry this review took so long and wasn’t as deep as some of my others! Super Smash Bros, guys. Fucking dangerous. There was more that I wanted to talk about in this episode, but I’d rather you get the review than spend any more time! Thanks, as always, to @daensarah and @watchingfairytales!!! Love you guys so much!!! Hopefully, I can get the Overview done within the next few days and then we can get to season 4!!!!
Season 3 Total (207/220)
Writer’s Scores:
Adam and Eddy (59/60)*
Kalinda Vazquez (34/40)*
Andrew Chambliss (42/50)*
Jane Espenson (28/30)*
David Goodman (39/40)*
Robert Hull (40/40)*
Christine Boylan (20/20)*
Daniel Thomsen (28/30)*
* Indicates that their work for the season is complete
Links to the rest of my rewatch will no longer be provided. They take posts with links outside of searches and I spend way too much time on these reviews to not give them that kind of exposure. Sorry for the inconvenience, but they still can be found on my page under Operation Rewatch.
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"It's possible I was angrier as a young man"
For many years, Oliver Stone tried to make a movie of The Fountainhead, Ayn Rand’s epic novel about the arrogant ur-capitalist and architect Howard Roark. Stone’s version would have reinvented Roark as a visionary designer of public buildings—maybe a guy like Fidel Castro or Hugo Chávez, two gifted egoists Stone has been known to pop a Fresca with. That’s interesting company for a born Republican and decorated Vietnam volunteer, though maybe not for the man who gave us Wall Street (1987) and Gordon Gekko, or who wrote Brian De Palma’s Scarface (1983).
Stone’s new film, W., is a biopic of George W. Bush that the director has scrambled to finance, shoot, edit, and release before the 2008 election. Surprising only to people unfamiliar with his work, Stone paints a politically excoriating but emotionally sympathetic portrait of our 43rd president. Josh Brolin stars in the title role, alongside Elizabeth Banks (Laura Bush), Jeffrey Wright (Colin Powell), Richard Dreyfuss (Dick Cheney), Thandie Newton (Condoleezza Rice), Scott Glenn (Donald Rumsfeld), and James Cromwell (George H. W. Bush). W. is Stone’s third crack at presidents or their legacies, following JFK (1991) and Nixon (1995). What could he possibly be thinking?
DAVITT SIGERSON: When I was first thinking about talking to you, lines from that Bob Dylan song “It’s Alright, Ma (I’m Only Bleeding)” came to mind: “If my thought-dreams could be seen/They’d probably put my head in a guillotine.” Do you ever feel like you’re running in a different time zone than the rest of the world?
OLIVER STONE: Why do you ask that question? Because I’m making a movie on George W. Bush?
DS: Well, no . . . We’ll get to that. But I have my own theories about why you freak people out so much.
OS: Oh, really? This is a great way to start. I like it. At least you’re honest. I would love to know your theory, if you can give me the short and sweet of it. It could help me frame my own life, I suppose.
DS: Well, I think this: You’re an impressive formalist, and you can be as grand or as vulgar as the material requires-for example, with the use of television and different film stocks in your movies. I also think that your films follow function because it seems you are, above all, a rabid moralist who is intent on saying what you’ve got to say. And I think that really freaks people out. People prefer a tasteful formalist to a rabid moralist. Even though you have elements of both in your work, I think that you . . . Well, I think you know what I think: that saying what you’ve got to say is the most important thing for you in your movies.
OS: Interesting. Very well said. I mean, I suppose in our culture—in our lifetime—we’ve always enjoyed people who tell it straight. We like our presidents, our comedians, and our actors to do that . . . It’s funny. You say that people prefer a tasteful formalism—as opposed to an oppressive formalism—but I do feel very strongly that form follows function. I really do. I’ve said repeatedly in many interviews over the years, “Look, the styles in my films have changed, and each film has a function at the time at which it was made.” But I don’t know that the point has really ever gotten across yet. I have skipped from style to style from film to film, and I love doing that because it’s given me the ability to free myself from the past. Perhaps one of the worst feelings that I can have is the feeling that I’m locked in, like a prisoner of myself, which is something we all feel at some point in our lives. So part of making those stylistic jumps is just to free myself up-to get away from the old or the old Oliver Stone. When I make a new movie, I always get stuck with, “That’s not an Oliver Stone film.” But I don’t know what to do about that except just move on. That’s why I was really happy to do W. It’s a chance to shrug it all off again. That’s the way I approached making the movie, and I know it’s one of the issues with its relationship to the other two presidential films I’ve made. But I’m leading you now-
DS: That’s all right. That’s good. I actually feel a lot of parallels between W. and Scarface.
OS: That’s interesting. Why is that?
DS: Well, let me disclose that I’ve seen a couple of versions of the script for W., and one of the things that struck me is that it seems you set off to make a film that is in many ways a very sympathetic understanding of George W. Bush. It’s certainly not a positive portrayal, but it definitely feels like you set out to get inside of him as a character and to understand him on his own terms—which is, I think, exactly what you did with Tony Montana in Scarface.
OS: That’s correct. It’s what I tried to do with Nixon, too.
DS: W. has that autumnal quality that Nixon had, but I also feel there are ways in which you and W. . . . For all the things that you and George W. Bush don’t have in common as people, there are some things that you do.
OS: Well, we both went to Yale, class of ’68. And although W. came from a much more powerful family, both of our families did have aspirations for us. I didn’t have the size of the family that he did-I don’t have brothers and sisters or a lot of cousins. We didn’t have boarders at our house or anything like that. But I did go to Yale and was raised Republican-Eisenhower Republican or Rockefeller Republican, I like saying. My dad was staunchly pro-Vietnam, and, you know, I believed everything I read in the media and saw on television in the ’50s and ’60s. I really did. And I watched the war in Vietnam unfold on that basis, without irony. I went as a volunteer.
DS: You requested combat duty.
OS: I requested infantry—I didn’t want to get fucked out of that. I didn’t want to end up in Germany or in South Korea or anything. And I got what I wanted. I got it in spades.
DS: Well, there’s a big difference between you and George W. Bush. You skipped out of Yale, and W. skipped out of Vietnam.
OS: I know. There are a lot of differences at that point—the fork in the road is huge. And I wish that George W. Bush had gone to Vietnam, because he would have seen history in a different light. He would’ve experienced it in a different light because I don’t think he understood the nature of war.
DS: But you do get us to like George W. Bush. There’s a scene, for example, where he drives up drunk after getting into Harvard Business School—
OS: Well, it goes beyond him being a kid. I, quite frankly, find him to be likable in the way that he’s a goofball president—it’s like having a bit of a goofball in the White House. I mean, people don’t like Richard Nixon. I found that out when Nixon came out—people just did not like the movie because they did not like the man. I think the movie is very well made, but there’s a thing about Nixon that turned people off: a dark side that Cheney also has. But in George W. Bush, there’s no evidence of a dark side that people see, and I think that’s fascinating about him. So people, of course, like him and trust him. As [Karl] Rove said, He’s a man you can have a beer with. And there’s an ineffable charm in that. Even my mother, who is a diehard-you know, she’s a Republican-and she’s seen what’s happened these last eight years, but she’s rigid about that. She said, “Don’t make a movie, Oliver, where you demean Bush or you hurt Bush.” And I was trying not to do that. I was trying to be, you know, fair is a tough word . . .
DS: Well, when it comes to hurting his cause, W. has already got the job covered, hasn’t he?
OS: Yes, George W. Bush speaks for himself. I mean, the fact that we haven’t had to make up words is the beauty of it. With Nixon, we had to reach inside and find some of that material-Nixon was very much a man behind closed doors. With Bush, you don’t have to reach very far. He’s put a lot of great, colorful stuff out there.
DS: I wanted to ask about that: One of the things about the movie that I found myself really enjoying is that the material is so familiar. I felt it was sort of like going to a Rolling Stones concert. They’re going to play “(I Can’t Get No) Satisfaction” and “Brown Sugar,” but you don’t know when. There is a reference that W. makes to his poppy, George H. W. Bush, throwing up in Japan . . .
OS: Yeah, there’s a lot of that going on, a lot of inside stuff.
DS: But the way you handled weaving in some element of the Rumsfeld “unknown unknowns” briefing from 2002 about evidence that Iraq was supplying terrorists with weapons of mass destruction . . . It makes up for the, perhaps, overfamiliarity of the story by providing all these little moments.
OS: One of the dangers about making a movie about a current president is that everyone thinks they know him. I think that people think they know a lot about George W. Bush—I mean, wherever I go, everyone has an opinion. But people don’t really know everything they need to know about him. They don’t know the history. They know how it all plays into the present, but they don’t think about it in terms of the whole span of his life and how his past contributed to what his thinking was at various points and how he allowed these certain things to happen. So by putting his life into a two-hour framework and dealing with some of the complexities of his time growing up and his youth-the first act-and then the second act, where he really had his greatness, I suppose, in the ’90s with the baseball team [Bush was part owner of the Texas Rangers from 1989 to 1998] and the Texas governorship, where he reached his level, so to speak . . . And then the third act becomes very interesting because this is the payoff: the seeds of the man now and the growth and the strength. This is the man who became stronger than his father and became president. So the movie really takes place at that point. The fulcrum is in 2001, after 9/11, and the movie is climactically about that 2001-to-2003 period. We didn’t go beyond the beginning of ’04—once he goes into Iraq, we know what happens. We didn’t want to go into the crumbling apart because we sort of know what’s happening now.
DS: You’re right. Especially around W.’s campaigns for the governorship of Texas, there are some key moments, like where he stands up to his poppy about the fact that he’s going to run. There’s also the conversation with Rove, where Rove says, “I’ll tell you what to say.” And W. says, “You’re the wordsmith, you give me the words, but I’ll tell you what we’re saying.”
OS: There’s also one of those defining moments when he tells Laura that his father lacks the decisive spirit of a decision maker. Stuff like that. We took dialogue from everywhere. We did sometimes put it into another context, but we tried to stay true to the feeling of it. In other words, like Rumsfeld’s line—”I know what I know and I know what I don’t know . . . ” He’s a great press conference guy, Rumsfeld, but we’re not showing him in a press conference, so our difficulty as dramatists is to get that stuff contextually into dialogue so that it makes sense. You have to do that as a dramatist-you have to have the people in front of you. I reread all the same research books—I think the book about Paul O’Neill by Ron Suskind [The Price of Loyalty: George W. Bush, the White House, and the Education of Paul O’Neill] was the first to break in 2004, and then Richard Clarke’s [Against All Enemies: Inside America’s War on Terror]. We read all those books, and they really started to change the picture of what was going on in the Bush administration. I really could not have made the movie in 2004, because we didn’t have the information. I mean, Bob Woodward penetrated a lot with his books, and there was also the other Suskind book, The One Percent Doctrine: Deep Inside America’s Pursuit of Its Enemies Since 9/11. We got a lot of that stuff into the movie, which was really tough to do. We put in a lot of rancorous disputes with Powell fighting with Cheney and Rumsfeld-there was sort of a triangle, and we went out on a limb in presenting that. Now I’ve been reading more and more that there were some big arguments behind the scenes, but that hasn’t really come out yet because Powell won’t write anything about it. Rumsfeld’s memoirs are coming, though I don’t think they’re going to be different than you’d expect—they’re going to be above it all, so to speak. But Powell did have some arguments. He did fight on behalf of his beliefs. All of these actors are great, by the way—Jeffrey Wright, who plays Powell, and Scott Glenn, who plays Rumsfeld. I can’t believe the humanity they brought to it.
DS: How did you handle presenting W.’s relationship with Laura? I really felt the truth of that couple. What did you do to get inside of that?
OS: There’s so little written on Laura-we read everything that we could, but then we had to go into the dialogue.
DS: That line, though, that’s in the film, “I read, I smoke, and I admire”-Laura Bush actually said that, didn’t she?
OS: I believe she said that in another context. Again, we have to deal with lines. If they said it to the press and we’re trying to fit it into a one-on-one situation, they won’t talk as they do sometimes to the public.
DS: There’s a moment of tremendous beauty in the script when W. and Laura are in London and Laura says, “Why don’t you go buy a suit?” And W. says, “The shoulders never fit.” That’s almost Death of a Salesman-like.
OS: “The shoulders never fit . . . ” I remember that line. It’s unfortunate that we didn’t shoot it.
DS: No?
OS: Yeah, I wrote the line. I don’t know if W. ever said that, though.
DS: Who cares?
OS: You liked that line?
DS: Oh, you’re fucking killing me.
OS: You have to recognize that this film was made -under Spartan conditions. Nobody in America wanted to make it, basically, except for one small company. And if it wasn’t for China and Australia and Germany, we wouldn’t even be talking about it right now. So thank God there’s a little diversity of thought in the world. But, you know, we made the film for $25 million, which is about 60 percent of what Nixon was made for, and we made W. in 46 days, which is amazing considering the amount of footage we got in that amount of time. Normally it would have been a 60- or a 70-day shoot, so I’m just saying that you have to let things go. You can’t fight for everything. So London is not in the film. I loved that scene, though, because I was in London when W. went through there [in 2003]. It was this remarkable moment in history, to just see an entire city closed down. They had to close down all of central London and keep everybody away from him. There were demonstrations. And the American media, again, did not really report it correctly.
DS: Well, obviously there was a hand behind that.
OS: Oh, yes. But that’s another movie, I suppose. In fact, I’m working on a documentary with Mark Weisbrot [the American economist and co-director of the Center for Economic and Policy Research in Washington, D.C.]. He’s very good with media subjects and the dirty tricks that go on.
DS: When I look at your three presidential pictures, it does feel that, as different as they are, you could almost weave them together into a sort of John Dos Passos-like triptych on American disappointment.
OS: Wow. I wrote a long essay on Dos Passos in high school.
DS: Did you really?
OS: Yes, I was a big fan of his. I was a Republican in school, and I remember liking Midcentury. I was very impressed with that. The style was unbelievable. He hasn’t been appreciated. He really got the workers, you know? When I was a young man, I thought, Wow, I’ve never read something like this. I really -understood what the Wobblies were about, the socialists . . . And I didn’t realize it at the time, but I identified with them. I had my own political framework, but the humanity of it got through to me. I remember the sex in those books-as a young man, reading those things under lightbulbs in dingy rooms. Farm girls and stuff.
DS: Let’s talk about Natural Born Killers [1994] for a minute.
OS: Sure.
DS: I understood that maybe Quentin Tarantino, who wrote the script, didn’t like what you did with it. I don’t know if that’s something you can talk about . . .
OS: Quentin never saw the film at that time, frankly—he admitted. Quentin and I have since spoken many times. You know, he was a young filmmaker. He was coming up, and there was a big dispute with him and two producers, Don Murphy and Jane Hamsher, who had he thought undermined him and gotten the rights. It’s a complicated story, but basically everything was done legally. And then I announced I was going to make the movie, and he was upset because it was his movie. But he had never expressed a desire to do it.
DS: So it was a business fight rather than one about interpretation.
OS: According to some, he never saw the movie-or he walked out of it 10 minutes in or whatever. But he just didn’t like the fact that I had changed his screenplay. Quite considerably-that was his issue.
DS: What’s funny about Natural Born Killers, having seen the film when it came out, was that there were things about it, like certain aspects of W., that seemed very familiar—the predatory newsmen characters, for example. Yet over time, between YouTube and Abu Ghraib, it has shown itself to be an unbelievably prescient movie. The main characters, Mickey and Mallory, have these roles as the self-cast stars in their own drama. That’s become the story of our world today.
OS: You know, I felt at the time that those characters in Natural Born Killers were archetypes that we should do big and broad and that we should make it a cartoon . . . This was the way the world was going. I put my feelings at the end of the movie very clearly. There was a run of things happening at the time making front-page news. It started roughly around the time of Tonya Harding and John Wayne Bobbitt’s penis being cut off and terminated with O.J. Simpson. It was just these three years in the media where all of this stuff was seeping onto the front page of The New York Times. It was ridiculous. It’s when the news became entertainment, I guess. Wasn’t it Laurence Tisch who started that up 10 years before, at CBS, when he said that the news -division was going to have to make money on its own? It was around ’86 when Tisch got a hold of CBS-and I say that because I remember it very clearly. It was a shock at the time. CBS never recovered.
DS: And now you get the pictures from Abu Ghraib, and it does look like a cartoon. I mean, it’s an indecent cartoon . . .
OS: Well, it’s been written about like a cartoon because it never went further than that. The media never invested in really following up. The hard news takes time—it’s not one-day stuff. It took years to bring that to the surface, you know? It took so much time. It took a lot of work. And even now more details are coming out. So hard news takes time. It takes a nonprofit sensibility.
DS: I was reading something, I think around the time all of these Abu Ghraib pictures first came to light, about why the people were smiling in the pictures. There’s an amazing Weegee [Arthur Fellig] photograph called Their First Murder. It was taken on a street in New York City. It’s of all these people standing around [an out-of-frame] dead body, and there is one kid looking up and smiling straight into the camera-because that’s what you do when there’s a camera, right?
OS: Well, we have pictures like that from Vietnam, snapshots of people standing over bodies. It’s that white-hunter thing. It’s part of the human instinct, the death ray that we all have—that dark side in every single person. Even Mr. Bush. If anybody is a walking optimist, it’s George W. Bush, but even he must have a dark side. I think we took a few shots at exploring this idea of who he is toward the end of the film. It does come out—Josh Brolin did an extraordinary job of bringing that to the surface.
DS: Back to Scarface: Tony Montana is an ultimate example of a character who you’re totally blatant about as a writer in terms of your moral judgment of him. And yet you show him so purely that he has become a kind of ultimate folk hero. Did that surprise you? Or was that part of your goal?
OS: There was an impulse in that direction. I think Mickey and Mallory in Natural Born Killers are the same thing. I remember what happened in Scarface vividly because I did most of the research in Miami and in Fort Lauderdale and the Caribbean-there were just guys like that around. They were obviously not as big as Tony was, but there had been some chain saw murders, as you know, and the AK-47 had been introduced into the streets of Miami for the first time in around 1981. As a dramatist, you could imagine where things were going to go because the DEA [Drug Enforcement Administration] was getting into the war on drugs down there big time-but they had no idea of the amount of money that was involved. They had no idea. I remember that the first estimates were in the $100 million range. It’s that big, you know? But little did we know that really, if you go back now and check Pablo Escobar and all that, the take was even bigger. It was probably in the billions.
DS: But what happened with the Tony Montana character afterward was like how Macbeth became a hero for Scotsmen.
OS: Yeah, well, I could say I was amazed. It did take off right away on the street. The black and Spanish communities really took to the picture, and they made a hero of the guy. I don’t think he was one. I think Al [Pacino] played him as an antihero, as a Brechtian character. Arturo Ui was really my influence in that, but it’s amazing . . . The same thing happened in Wall Street. Gordon Gekko was the antihero of the picture.
DS: You told me about the documentary that you’re doing with Mark Weisbrot, but what is the subject of the other one you are currently working on?
OS: It’s a secret. I’ve been working on it for a year. I’ve self-financed it up to today. It’s another one of those tough ones to get made.
DS: And then what’s next after that? Do you know?
OS: No, I really don’t. I wrote an original, which is a smaller film, but it’s really important to me and hopefully-maybe-I’ll get a chance to make it. The market has changed so much, and the business in the last 10 years—it’s gone, the way I know it. I’ve been operating on the edges since Nixon. I’ve been independent, except a couple of times when I went back and worked for studios under completely different circumstances than I had before. It’s just that the risk factor in making a film has become so enormous. The corporations have become bigger. The accounting mentality is completely dominating the business. So people like me-and directors in general-are kind of like a thing of the past.
DS: This can be a function of aging, but do you think you’re less angry than you once were? Because I think it would have been pretty fair to characterize you as an angry guy. Whenever I see pictures of you, you have these puffy eyes, and I always think, Oh, he’s been crying tears of rage his whole life.
OS: [laughs] Oh, really? It’s possible that I was angrier when I was younger. I think a function of getting older is that you figure out more and you become more compassionate toward everybody, even people who dislike you. I don’t think it’s an issue of what’s fair—I think that compassion is the key because in a movie, you have to relate to the person you’re telling the story about. Even if it’s Richard III or Henry VIII or Macbeth, you have to relate to that person. And that’s been part of my learning curve, too.
-Davitt Sigerson interviews Oliver Stone, Interview, Nov 25 2008 [x]
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1x09 Excalibur
I'm oding on these eps/posts today because I'm avoiding real responsibilities, like an adult.
Is the horse ALSO undead? Did this creature really make a living horse crash through a window to make a big entrance? Cuz I'll hate him more for that.
I'm American, I know fuck all about Monarchy. I'm not totally clear on the Crown Prince distinction. Is it just a ceremony for Arthur's milestone birthday? Like a quince but for princes? I mean he's the only son of the king, what difference could it possiblity make?
Sir Owain calls himself Oh-wahn but everyone else calls him Oh-wane and it's irritating as balls.
The rules for the gauntlet challenge make very little sense to me. You throw it down and anyone who picks it up can fight you. But presumably, you're throwing it down because you want to fight somebody specific, so what is the deal with this loophole? Is it specifically to prevent the death of kings?
How many brothers does Ygraine have and why are they all annoying
The way Merlin books it when the black knight turns his head towards him 😂
Is it me or do all the villainesses in this series have hair that is not straight? It seems to range from wavy hair to messy curls to line, dreads, but all the women who play villains seem to have some kind of styling that includes some degree of curling.
"You could say... there is a bond between us" yea a PROFOUND bond amirite
"I gripped you tight and raised you from the lake" 😂😂😂ok I'll stop
Arthur walking up fully dressed and realizing he's overslept is a fuckin MOOD
Touching moment between Arthur and Uther. The parallel between them and the following scene where Gaius and Merlin are having dinner, a healthy father/son relationship contrasting the strained, toxic, (even tho they DO love each other) relationship between Arthur and Uther is just perfect.
The anguished dragon is pretty cool too.
Commentary is Angel, Richard, Colin, and Jeremy (who I'm starting to suspect just really likes the sound of his own voice)
Colin and Jeremy confirm it's a coming of age ceremony for Arthur's 21st. That makes a lot of sense.
For some reason everyone is mumbling and I can barely understand anything being said, but luckily Jeremy seems to just be repeating things he's already said in previous episode commentaries. They constantly mention when it's gone from France to Wales and frankly their production schedule is stressing ME out even tho it happened to other people ten years ago
Apparently they had to deal with like, school trips to the castle while filming, which is just endlessly funny to me
Apparently they use an actual book of spells in Old English for Merlin's incantations! It's nice tho near them having a laugh about people's criticism of the pronunciations.
Also love Colin laughing at Merlin's obliviousness, reminded me of this:
(x)
Apologies for the sloppy photo cred, I can't figure out how to do it on mobile since html doesn't work. I will edit to correct it when I'm at an actual computer.
Lollllllll Gaius hightailing it out of the chamber when Arthur came in after he'd been released from his chamber had everyone cackling, myself included.
I really like having Colin do the commentary cuz he goes into the details of the story, not just the sort of technical aspects of filming. He makes a good point about the sword: what exactly was he supposed to do in that situation? Merlin is alone in the set up tent with Uther, the fucking king, he didn't really have ant recourse to keep the sword out of his hands - what it ultimately comes down to, is who is the bigger threat? The king standing in front of you, who you know FOR A FACT considers your life to be of exactly ZERO value, who could have you executed on the spot, with Arthur not even there to defend you, OR the talking dragon chained up in the basement that you don't even have to face immediately? I hadn't even thought of that but it really was a lose-lose for Merlin.
#bbc merlin#bbc merlin spoilers#merlin#merlin spoilers#merthur#1x09#bbc Merlin 1x09#Merlin 1x09#excalibur#onceandfuturerewatch
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