#im so happy for him and for me and the people that were hoping for this
Note
i think rainhaze is one of my favorites characters ever genuinely, issue 37 was AMAZING and i really loved how rainhazes arc finally ended. I feel rlly happy bc this was a very poingant way of putting that rabid dog down but also i mean. I am a little sad. I pity rainhaze but in a way you pity a cocroach or something... He had it coming, his death was soooo well executed!! rain and all of defiance see killing as a divine right, and seeing that turn on rainhaze was very cathartic.
The casual way he spoke about asphodels murder was genuinely sickening. As if it was all a favor to HER, instead of rainhazes cowardice and trauma and brainwashing and selfishness making him kill his niece im cold blood. The way his own death dragged on and on, how painful and terryfying and gruesome it was - this is what asphodelpaw went through. Her death was not like falling asleep and neither was his. It was scary and painful and cold. So cold.
The way this comic completely subverted audience expectations with rainhazes character is sooo so good... At first he was just a chilli dead guy. then he turned into a classic winter solider type - morally dubious but still symphatetic, a 'poor little meow meow' who was stuck in a horrible situation he had no way of leaving. and then he killed asphodelpaw in cold blood. That moment, when he chose to embrace the violence, the damned coward, was such a delicious and twisted reaveal - forcing the reader to reconsider the whole story and character from an entirely new perspective.
i think we as people well versed in fandom tend to woobify and water down characters like rainhaze and make them into 'poor little meow meows' - removing their agency in the situation entirely to make them more personable and toned down - and rain feels to me like a purposful dissection of that. he IS sympathetic, to a degree. the shit he want through was undeniably awful - and it broke him and molded him into a monster.
rainhazes character was always about choice, i think. about decisions you make and the decisions made for you, and how you respond to the latter... about the question of autonomy. where does your choices end and other peoples influence begin? and does it really matter, in the end? does it matter whether or not rainhaze did what he did out of his own will or under rangers influence? he still did it. even if he were sorry, and hes not, would that matter? he killed her. there is no bringing her back and he had to deal with the consequences himself. abandoned by his family and his tormentor alike.
his death was pathetic and slow and pitiful, and above all disturbing - just like rainhaze himself. i think thats the word that describes him best - pathetic. rest in pieces, you cold bastard. ill miss you.
sorry this is so long..... i tried to put my thoughts into words here and i still fell short, i hope at least some of it makes sense
So, so many people have wonderful, intricate and moving thoughts about Rainhaze in my inbox, and I want to share them all with you. So here is the first one.
Rainhaze really did make for a great deconstruction of the "poor little guy" trope that I was interested in exploring. Shellspring also did, to an extent, but with Rainhaze I wanted to get really deep into it. How much of this is his fault? What could he have done differently? Is his death cathartic, satisfying, triumphant, painful, tragic, or anything else? It was a lot of fun to write and I'm glad so many people seem to have enjoyed it.
#ask#rainhaze#analysis#currently i have about 240 asks so like. it may take a bit to get to them all understand#patfw spoilers
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Helluva Boss Episode 8, season 2
Ok so this show has
5 more episodes. Then the show will either
A be done
Or
B, have a season 3.
Whatever way it goes, I hope the show wraps and gives characters satisfying endings. Though I fear that will the episodes spread out, some element or plot continuity will be lost.
What does Pride Weather mean? Is it like the the normal weather report but gay????
GOD DANG IT ANOTHER SONG.
Ok, so Stolas is thinking that his and Blitzo’s relationship will help him deal with the divorce and the negative voices in his head. A fairytale like romance is what Stolas seems to want, where his problems can be fixed with the power of love. Meanwhile Blitzo is just thinking of the relationship as only a friend’s with benefits thing. Interesting that he is also using the relationship as a way to not think about his problems.
“Would he want me if he was free? And if he’s only here as a prisoner, what kind of monster does that make me? My entire life been written in stone. He taught me that I could choose. He desverse the choice to stay or go. Though it scares me to think of what I’ll lose.”
Wow. So far, this is a lot to take it. But what really gets my interest is that Stolas repetitively saying that he wants to free them. Both Blitzo and him. But from what? Is it judgmental from others? Is it from powerful demons that could break their relationship? Or is it from Stolas’s guilt and regrets? Another interesting thing is that when Blitzo sees the date, he has to mental hype himself up to the idea of sex. At first he has a strain smile in the mirror, but once Blitzo keeps talking about sex in detail, he’s like the idea. I don’t know if Blitzo doing this hype up is supposed to be taken has a funny thing, or a way to show that Blitzo is hypersexual. But it does feel like a coping mechanism. I don’t think people normally have to hype themselves up to have sex with someone, or even feel apathetic at first. Also, Blitzo talks about what HES going to do to Stolas, and not what Stolas does for him. Does Blitzo do all the work in bed?
YOOOO THE GOVERNMENT PEOPLE AND THE CHURRUBS ARE BACK YESSSS
Wait wait wait!!!! Are the two angels going to be more and more corrupted and the goat boy is going to go back to heaven YESSSSSSSS I love that.
Oh, 👀 angles can physically be hurt, hit with blow darts, and be electrocuted. Interesting.
PRIST WITH A GUN WHAT WILL THEY DO. This feels so cursed. Omg pls pls pls give the Angels or at least one of them a gun…
EXCUSE ME??????? THE GOVERNMENT WAS LIKE YEAH WILL GIVE YOU MORE MONEY. MAKE A LITERALLY PORTAL TO HELL AND MAKE SOME KILLER CLONE PREIST.., AHHHH THE ANGELS ARE IN HELL NOW
hmmm since Hazbin Hotel finally aired, would this story still be in the same world as Hazbin? Aka angels killing demons? Or no? If the churrubs seem so gun-hoe on killing, were they apart or admire Adam’s army?
There noticeable less swearing here! Wow! Good job Viv.
Oh! So interesting thing, 1 the demons get physical sick at saying the word torture. And 2 they don’t know what sex is. Or at least, they don’t know what sex equipment is. Do Angels natural not know these thing or get sick when saying certain words? Is it just heaven born angels that are like this? The 2 rouge angels (whose names i forget) seems fine with stealing and killing, but not at torture. Will they get comfortable with it as they stay longer in hell? Will being in hell at all make then like, permanently banned from heaven?
There lots of sex shops in the Lust ring. I thought it would just be one company? That kind of neat how there many stores of the same products but with minor variations. Some neat worldbuilding. Heyyyyy it’s Frizz. He seems more happy and cheerful! Yippee. Also he seems more sex neutral or positive? Also obsidian and jewel equipment? That feels very fancy? Maybe? I feel like hell would have lots of rocks and crystal around since, you know, under the earth.
🎼🎵IM A ANGEL WITH A SHOTGUN FIGHTING TILL THE WARS WON I DONT CARE IF HEAVEN WONT TAKE MEEEE BACKKKKKK ILL THROW AWAY MY FAITH BABE JUST TO KEEP YOU SAFE DONT YOU KNOW YOUR EVEYTHING I HAVEEEEEEE🎵🎼
Loona’s voice seems different. Maybe it’s because I haven’t heard it in a while, maybe the VA has a good microphone. But it feels sharper and clearer. All the voices do. It feels like higher quality.
Ok. Now the ending.
Stolas gave Blitzo a crystal, that way Blitzo and his team can legally travel to earth and back. Stolas called off the deal, and says that even thought they don’t have that agreement anymore, he (Stolas) would like to still have Blitzo stay. Blitzo, at first thinks it’s a roleplay, or a joke. But once Stolas starts to leave, Blitzo gets angry. He even calls Stolas a porous asshole, just like Striker did. Blitzo gets angry and even starts to tear up, saying that Stolas had, treated him like other imps. That Stolas looks down on imps and doesn’t respect them. Blitzo even comments on his imp butler.
In the background, many objects are covers in tarps, and all the paintings have Stolas’s wife covered, while Olivia has her face shown. It seems like Olivia either doesn’t live with Stolas, or goes back and forth between her parents. I’m bringing this up because like before, Stolas doesn’t want the relationship to be base off a deal. He thinks highly of Blitzo, but Blitzo only thinks of the relationship as something that’s transactional. Stolas wants this relationship because it the only one in his life that seems to either bring him joy, or doesn’t let him think about his problems. While I do like that Stolas calling off the deal and giving Blitzo the crystal. I feel like the last line “I think highly of you and you think so lowkey of me” feels a bit manipulative?
Like, yeah Blitzo does feel that way. Why shouldn’t he? What has Stolas done besides letting him use the book, what has he done for Blitzo? Did Stolas even gave Blitzo comfort? Did he ever let Blitzo talk about their deal? Does Stolas actually out effort into their deal or does Blitzo do all the work? Stolas let Blitzo not have sex for a few months, but is that it? Blitzo has being Stolas bodyguard, help him track down Olivia, save Stolas multiple times. He even bought a bunch of sex equipment and seems to do all the sexual favors. So yeah. It’s damn well in Blitzo right to think lowly of Stolas.
Man I hope and pray that the series dosnt have then be endgame.
Review 4/5. The song was ok. I like that the angels and government guys are back and have more power, hate Stolas.
#long post#helluva boss#helluva boss review#my thoughts#helluva boss episode 8#helluva boss critical#helluva boss criticism#helluva boss spoilers
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journal entry, may 30th 2024
i feel myself rotting from the inside. nothing brings the same joy it once did. ‘once’ being a time i can't even remember.
when i was a kid, i was free. i was alive. i know its common for trans women, we all lose something of ourselves growing up, probably. but the isolation took too much from me. it took my soul.
i used to be so cheerful, so outgoing. so uncaring of what others thought of me, so emotional. being forced into that room, a constant terror, i had nothing to leave the house for, no friends, no hope. i remember sitting on the dining room table, the only place wifi worked, from the moment i woke up to the moment my father came home, talking constantly to the only people i had, my discord ldrs, people who thought i was 16 when i was 13, people who loved me for the face i put on and who would listen to at least some of my cries.
i wish i fucking killed him. i shouldve taken that fucking knife and stabbed him over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over. why was i so fucking stupid, to think me going to jail would change my life at all? everyone i know’s lives would be further improved by my utter absence of it. if i could be struck by a device that erased me from everyones memories, my friends would only be happier. mom would be happier without that breakdown. mutt would've been. all of them would. the only one who wouldnt is knives, and ive accepted that evil (selfishness) of my desire to die
it isnt some attempt at self depreciation, it is an acknowledgement of my place in this world. it may not inherently be better with my absence, but many people’s worlds would be.
its fucking stupid, really, what started this all on. my envy of those with more, my desire for a dad which i knew would never come to fruition, my desire for a family in general, my gradual loss of friendliness with my irl isolation alongside all of it, my failed attempts to make myself message mutuals like dadsmell or femboytorturer (especially stupid, i barely know her, but still. the point was in my general failure of not speaking.) then it all . spiraled. when i felt the cold that first time i was so happy that i might die. the guilt i was wracked with when i lived was so much worse than the terror i felt before it. so i hid, and tried again, and hid, until i had no choice, until i broke, talked to suffer, until i was brought to azriels.
that moment gave me an ounce of hope, hearing that i would have a friend in this city who wanted to hang out with me often and help me some too. its a shame i was a bit rude that one time in the depths of it. and its a shame he used that moment to tell people i attacked him days prior when i hadnt. i missed the show right after, the first show i was ever gonna be able to go to. we were sposed to go together. but. i dont really get to have fun like the other girls. all ive wanted for so long is to go to a show and dance, ive never danced, really. im too scared. it wouldve made so much better. idk why he. why that. had to happen, i actually felt good and tried for a day or two, until that happened.
ever since then its been worse and worse. i remember that nice puppygirl mutual who sent me puppy hugging gifs in my asks when i was sad, i remember miyoria checking in on me, after the cold of not talking for so long, after that server left me to rot. i remember getting to talk to soxy for the first time in so long. i remember trianon almost visiting, i remember us calling. i remember finally getting to dm w piper, and a lot of my favourite mutuals. i remember feeling good from all of that. the little bit of good i could. and now they're gone. the dying girls strife is too much to bear for so long- i already gave mom the worst breakdown, i wouldnt be surprised if i hurt more like this too. and yet i still love them. i guess its my fault, for letting myself fall like this. for killing myself.
when knives came, and helped me with my passport. its presence was so fucking good. but even if the passport goes through, i now have no one i care about who would even take me in, unlike before, when the offers were common. now i am rotten in the eyes of the beasts. this carcass is no good. i guess knives leaving was the nail in the coffin. that it doesn't get better. everyone forgets you, no matter what you do. youre hopeless, girl, all that you could've been is gone now. im sorry i couldnt have been a person . i rlly wanted to be and to try.
allure, you poor poor rotten girl. you were built to die, and nothing more. you were meant to be killed and feasted on. you were right when you said that this would make everything worse, you were right when you said that the world is not yours, and most sadly, you were right when you screamed out, with nothingness in your voice. was “allure” ever even real in the first place. was i? was she? you won't answer, i know you won't.
ive gained at least 200 followers on tumblr since this started. and i havent felt so alone in a long time. my attempts were less lonely than this. the few people who are left, i can barely even message often because of the crippling murderous cloud in my head, brought on by everything prior. i wish i couldve gotten a fucking chance.
i used to be, at least somewhat liked. people liked my little kink posts, i got some mutuals i could comnect w and who i thought were cool, who i rlly wanted to connect with. people thought i was cute, some people even wanted to play games w me, (thanks margo, love her) but now theres fucking. nothing. when i post online with an attempt at talking again i am left utterly hopeless.
and still, this has mostly just been my online strife. not to fucking mention the physical life, the way i have been left stranded every time ive been at a hangout, the way tgirls only think of me as ‘cute’ instead of anything actually tangibly good. not to mention the fucking uselessness of my soul and the rotten pit in my mind. im mentally ill, but in all the ways that make you a faker and an idiot and unloveable and imfuckingpossible, non existent. not real.
i miss you, my life. i miss you. i miss the little things i had, even thought i know that that isolation wouldve still killed me. a girl can only handle having all her interaction being vcing in a server of ppl who willfully ignore her for the more attractive and ‘good autistic’ ppl for so long before something snaps.
i miss you, my friends, the friends who will probably never talk to me again, the friends i havent heard from since this all began, i still miss and love. because i am ruined. god i miss them so bad. i wish i had a chance to have a life irl, hell i wish i had a chance to have a life even just on tumblr right now, but im being killed.
i cant write more. my throat has been torn and my hands have been assaulted. and my head is still dying of fog.
but i hate that im alive right now, i hate that i couldnt die yesterday. i hate that i am even here to write this, disappointing all, especially myself, especially her. fuck i miss her. all i can do now is keep trying whenever i can and let everyone give up so i will fade from memory even faster. its all i have, when no one is present.
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YOUR BEAUTY IS SIMPLE.
chigiri hyoma x reader
tags: fluff, gossiping, girl talk, cutesy relationships, flustered reader, established relationship, short.
taglist: n/a currently.
characters: chigiri hyoma, hyoma’s sister, reader, (non romantic) mentions of isagi yoichi, chris prince, reo mikage, nagi seishiro, rensuke kunigami, meguru bachira.
word count: 625
extra: FINAL REPOST FROM A TWITTER THREAD. technically i’m also gonna make a kaiser one but that isn’t posted yet!! wish this was longer but im lazy + i get to post the rest of my fics soon since i’ll have enough backlogged !!
many people assume that when you started dating chigiri, he would automatically care for your skincare and routine constantly. everyone assumed he would be making sure you’re taken care of always.
it was… partially true.
sure, he did care about taking care of you. he’d comb his fingers through your hair slowly before you two fell asleep. he would brush your hair and help you out of bed in the mornings you weren’t feeling the best.
it wasn’t as major as people made it out to be. it wasn’t constant. he did it when you two were both open.
what was becoming a constant was his big sister doing your nails every weekend. you’d come over an hour early for chigiri, then get stopped by her when she saw you walk in.
the conversations ranged from your day, to a childhood memory, to her skin care routine, it just mattered on how you two were feeling. but on this day, the conversation had trailed off into chigiri.
since he had been away from his sister for a while because of soccer, you were there to give her all the updates.
“oh! and he made friends with this guy named yoichi isagi.”
“oh… the black haired undercut? i see why! he’s so, so sweet, isn’t he?” her shrill voice made you briefly stiffen.
“he’s very sweet! they get along well, along with reo, nagi, bachira, kunigami, the… british coach guy? hyoma has had an easier time making friends with people.”
“maybe manipulating teenagers into thinking they have to only care about themselves makes them clingy towards people with very similar experiences?”
it seemed about right… “why are you thinking about it like that?”
“i’m just happy my brother doesn’t only have some freaky guys talking about ego in his ear… that facility annoyed me,” she brushed her fingers against your collarbone, “besides, he’s always talking about you.”
you knew she saw your little twitch as her lips curved into a smile, “mhm, always. it’s like all he thinks about is you!”
you didn’t care, you don’t care, it doesn’t matter, it isn’t important, why would it matter? “what does he say?” fuck.
“oh… y’know,” she was dragging this out, “he mentioned that he wanted to take you on a date this friday. like a little surprise. he had a rose and everything on order…”
“oh! yeah… cool.”
…
it was impossible to remain casual. “what else?”
the words of his sister continued to fuel your ego more and more. it shouldn’t have made your heart feel this warm for your cold-hearted princess of a boyfriend to be secretly saying this cute stuff about you, but it did. it made you want to burst out into tears and run into his arms.
the entire time she spoke, your leg bounced as a tick to show joy. your hands fooled around with each other as a mechanism to calm down. it wasn’t that these worked, but it was worth a shot.
“then he grabbed a bonsai plant, which he said he hated, and wanted to give you it because it reminded him of you! he carried it around the entire store and—”
the click of a lock shot both of your head straight to the door. chigiri. you swung your body to be facing the window instead of him. though you couldn’t see it, a light was pulled from his eyes briefly.
“hm. how are you two?”
you willingly ignored the conversation you had been having previously in a feeble attempt to suppress your feelings. you were just focused on calming that blush on your face. the stupid blush your boyfriend didn’t even know he caused… you hoped to give him the same sort of embarrassment one day.
#chigiri x reader#chigiri hyoma x reader#chigiri hyoma#bllk#bllk x you#blue lock#x reader#cupid’s bangers
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Tidbits of ATSV That I Enjoyed (Or Alternatively: Just Miles Being The Most Endearing Spidey Ever)
Miles patting The Spot's head after successfully webbing him (I don't see this as condescending, but rather him still engaging with the humanity of a villain like Spot) and ~very assertively~ telling/asking him not to escape.
"I'm like Robin Hood-if he gave to himself."
Miles' spidey senses going off when he arrives late to his dad's party because there's nothing more frightening than Brown parents when they're mad at you. Beware the chancla or correa!
O.k. So we all know there are different versions of the movie out there. You may already know that one of the slight differences is when Miles goes to save Inspector Singh. There's a version where you can hear Gwen's voice in the distant background yelling no! when she thinks Miles gets crushed under the rubble, and there's another where she's silent as she webs to him. Now, I have found ANOTHER version (online) where her shouting is even more at the forefront. She's practically screaming and sounds more desperate, (prolly because it's close to the same way her Peter Parker died so she's reliving trauma) and the fear in her voice is palpable. That one haunts me.
Jefferson trying to equate studying for his police exams to childbirth, which Rio quickly nips in the bud.
Ganke having a soccer poster of Son Heung Min, a famous Korean footballer who currently plays for the Premier League Tottenham Hotspur and is captain of the South Korean national team.
Miles having a Sashimi (his universe's version of Supreme, but I just like the idea that Miles loves eating sashimi. Like I know that kid has good taste in food) poster in his bedroom.
The fact that Miles kept in touch with Aunt May for long enough after the events of ITSV that he helps her move.
The Spot saying he was one of the more handsome scientists at Alchemax according to his colleagues.
Miles and Gwen having the same collectible toys, the only difference being that he keeps his in the box and she doesn't.
"Hey, don't try to wow me with big words, man," *in deep manly voice* "I do crosswords every day"- Miles after Spot points out Alchemax as "the crucible of our connection!"
Miles going, "This job is so dumb sometimes" after he tries to web Spot at the deli, but it goes through a hole and lands on his face.
"Nahhh, he seems more Dominican to me." Kinda want Miles to meet a native Dominican Spidey because that dynamic would highkey fuck hard *pun not intended*. They would repair relations between our two islands-PR&DR.
"Almost there Mami *smiley face* *cowboy* prayer hands*"
The college admissions coach at Visions Academy straight up saying, "That's your story! Now, just stick to the script..." Ma'am what???
"Calmate Mami, eso no es my fault."
"I've hit a lot of different villains with a lot of different food...I'm just trying to lighten the mood."
Miles in his angsty teen era and smart-mouthing everyone around him. Love that for him.
"He almost killed his mom as a baby, I mean, look at those shoulders." No but for real tho. Those shoulders are as wide as a truck. Kim Seokjin who??? (if you understood that reference, ily).
Miles writing a love letter to his dad in 2 cakes.
Gwen at the water tower chowing and saying how feelings make her hungry after her and Miles talked about how they can't be together cause it would end in tragedy. Like Gwen, come again?!
Also, Miles' and Gwen's talk at the Williamsburg Bank Building being lowkey the catalyst for the 2nd/3rd acts of the film. Without them both kind of silently admitting their feelings for each other, Miles probably wouldn't have chased after her the way he did. Pretty sure you know the rest.
"I bet she doesn't even speak Spanish," and Jeff going "Que barbaridad" in his very broken Spanish. Queue Rio's bombastic side eye.
Both Gwen and Miles referring to Spot as a Villain Of The Week, even though neither of them have spoken about Spot to each other.
"I was bitten by a-wouldnt you like to know? Know what I mean?" SIR. Chill. This movie is for children.
The Spot inverting himself, going from a white mass with black spots to a gaping black hole with smaller white spirals. It's giving Junji Ito.
The irony of Pavitr exclaiming, "Well that was another easy adventure for Spider-Man!" right before an incoming canon event. HIS. He was about to experience his first big loss, and his happy-go-lucky nature would've been challenged.
Miguel saying conyo! when all the Spideys start pointing at each other.
"!Cállate!" "Nosy!" Sidebar: we don't talk about Gwen's banter with bad guys enough. She's so funny!
A lot of the Peters saying hi to Gwen as she passes HQ because she is canonically the one lost love--the love interest they all would've ended up with had she not died, so they all have an affection for her.
Web-Slinger going "Giddy up!" Cause he's swinging up.
Miles offering his fresh new takes on how to deal with the Spot upon meeting Miguel, saying "He just wants to be taken seriously. Like we all do." MILES YOU BEAUTIFUL, COMPASSIONATE GOLDEN SUNFLOWER BOY I LOVE YOUUUUU.
Hobie referring to Peter B. as Humbling Reality Spider-Man, which considering how steeped in tragedy the Spidey lore is, is really saying something.
Miguel's nonono no puedo más no puedo más. His misery is very funny and delightful to me. Little bitch ass.
"You know you're the only Spider-Man who isn't funny." Yes! More Miguel slander in the next one, please! Little bitch ass.
"Snitch!"
Miles shouting out Peter's name for help whilst Miguel pins and lays into him the fact that he's an anomaly. This after he momentarily glitches back to his ITSV store-bought suit. Mimicking the way-in also the first movie-Miles shouting out Peter's name for his own rescue as Doc Ock attacks him at the research facility. Because even though he feels hurt by Peter at this point, that's still his dad mentor and he still instinctively looks to him for protection. Rip my heart out why don't you!
Gwen sneaking back into her and her dad's place just to get that printed polaroid of her and Miles, a pic she already has on her phone.
Earth-42 Miles wearing Nike while our Miles wears Jordans.
#hi. ive seen this movie 8x in theaters and twice on pirating sites. i am unwell#also sorry not sorry for the miguel slander. i am a miles loyalist thru and thru thst bitch is on thin ice#but also literally can't get over gwen “it really is so nice to get to talk to you. me & him its different. in every other universe...stacy#cause directly underneath that she's actually saying. “i missed you. and what i have with you i literally do not have with anyone else and.#you dont know this but ive met hundreds and thousands of spiderpeople. nd even in my friendship with hobie its not like what i have with yo#and im actually really smitten with you. the one person i shouldn't be smitten with bc there is no happy ending for us. and idk...#if i should hold off. and im letting you know all this so that you can decide for me. whether to take that lesp of faith or not with you. &#hope that say yes and make the first move so that i cant but help to just sink into you.“#AND IT MAKES SENSE! SHE MET HIM JUST AS HE WAS LIVING THROUGH AN EXPERIENCE SHE DID. OF BECOMING SPIDEY. AND RIGHT AFTER#SUFFERING THE GREATEST TRAGEDY OF HER LIFE WHICH SHE WAS ABOUT TO BEAR WITNESS THRU WITH HIM. SHE WAS THERE FOR HIS UNCLE DYING AND WATCHED#HIM BECOME SPIDERMAN. WE FORGET THAT THEY ACTUALLY WENT THRU SOME HEAVY THINGS TOGETHER. THEYRE TRAUMABONDED. I KNOW THATS NOT WHAT THAT WO#ACTUALLY MEANS. BUT IT MAKES SENSE THAT SHE CAN ONLY TALK TO MILES BC THEY PERFECTLY UNDERSTAND EO.#anyways idk why im shouting. im high rn. but crazy how all of that meaning was subtly thrown in there. like we got a confession scene folks#from gwen of all people! i love that for me.#also back to miguel: so i know he's hot. but if a hot person were to ever be rude to a waiter we agree theyre no longer hot right? right.#atsv#miles morales#itsv#miguel o'hara#the spot#ghostflower#gwiles#gwen stacy#ghost spider#gwen x miles#rio morales#across the spider verse#into the spider verse
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idk but saying jennifer lynn barnes sucks at writing romance because your ship wasn't canon is beyond hilarious to me like okay???? HAHHAHAHA. everyone has their own preferences of course but the vehement hatred for jlb and the belittlement of her writing on booktok and bookstagram (sometimes on here) has been ASTOUNDING.
a note about the "poorly done romance/love triangle" in tig: jlb never said it was going to be "even". no one ever said that. personally pioneering the idea that one character was "not given a chance" does not make it a poorly written love triangle or a poorly written romance. in love triangles, there is usually ALWAYS one option who is simply NOT a real option. look me in the eye and tell me characters jeremiah fisher, aspen in the selection series, gale hawthorne, adam kent, jacob black, and i'm sorry but grayson hawthorne amongst a myriad of others were actual contenders for the main character. if you believed they are/wanted them to be, that's great! but all of these characters are in well known love triangles and at the end of the day, books with love triangles WILL sell because they generate conversation and hype around the book. it is a marketing tactic and you are NEVER promised equal opportunity from both love interests. you losing the love triangle or that you believe there is wasted potential doesn't mean bad writing has occurred. also, for the love of god, while you are supposed to relate to a character, you are not the main character!! belly, america, katniss, juliette, avery, what have you, all chose based on who they are as characters. and also, female characters don't have to "experience" both love interests to make a decision. if they want to, that's totally fine, but specifically about avery bc this is what this blog is all about, she absolutely knows what she's "missing out" on with grayson and she doesn't care. shipping averygrayson just blatantly feels like ignoring avery's wants and needs.
anyway, if you want to call jlb's writing poorly done bc you didn't get your way, that's totally fine. you are entitled to your own opinion. it's just funny that you say that bc had grayson and avery been randomly thrown together in the epilogue of tfg or something, i have a feeling you wouldn't be of this opinion.
tldr; love triangles are a marketing tactic and you are neither entitled to a win nor is is poorly done/executed if you lose. love triangles, more often than not, have a clear winner from the beginning (coughcough "see? you're already his") but the debate and drama of another character sells the book.
#the inheritance games#oh god the love triangle discourse is so tiring does it not get OLD????#averyjameson#avery grambs#avery kylie grambs#jennifer lynn barnes#been a while since i went on a rant#tig#if you disagree idrc bc im not trying to convince you that you can't think something is poorly written#averygrayson#anyway! miss you guys#can't wait for the brothers hawthorne!!!!#i think she's a genius romance writer bc im rr tig and she sprinkles in these moments from the very beginning and wow#she has such a big brain#god booktok is annoying and the comments on jlb's insta posts are so??????#like imagine the amount of “how dare you not make ag endgame” comments she's gotten (by the same people every post but still) is so weird#“how are you” “what were you thinking” “it was a love triangle and grayson was the right option i'm not reading you books anymore” LOL#or “how are you not let gray be endgame/have avery/be happy” hm avery isn't a prize and gray doesn't let himself be happy hope that helps!#i thought the sad/chronically unhappy thing was y'all's brand for him but suddenly when he doesn't flip a switch and be :D y'all hate it??#him forgiving himself at the end and letting himself feel was HUGE like ?? ive digressed but tell me you dont understand him w/o telling me
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the nature of being a tougahead is laughing along with someone dunking on him like hahaha yes he’s so terrible and dysfunctional and he sucks so bad and then they’re like And He Should Die For Real By The Way and you’re like oh! ok! especially fun when someone writes a really considered and meaningful analysis of his character that youre nodding along to like ‘yes, finally a touga understander!!’ and then they end it saying that he’s irredeemable. you guys know that ‘he’s not a fucking coupon’ post? yea
#if you don’t like touga that’s cool and i respect you#so long as you don’t earnestly believe that he should die. or whatever. like this is the hope and recovery against all odds show guys#like fun fact about me i used to hate touga. sooooo much. i didnt like him one bit#but ive been working on self compassion teehee (this is a joke (it’s not))#it’s complicated he’s complicated. i care about him. you dont have to#is that concept not obvious?#it’s like i always say the most powerful thing abt the kiryuus to me is that their estrangement is a happy ending for both of them#my loving nanami isn’t compromised by my loving touga. if they were real people i knew irl that’s a different case but this is fiction babe#and they’re both gonna live lives independent of one another that (i hope (believe)) will make them shine#swagever this was just a silly post about liking touga now im sad#dais.txt
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. anyway after writing the tags 4 this post i told my research partner i will no longer follow his dreams lmao. still helping w it but i need to engage in research that i find satisfying
#i think ive been waiting for something for a while and i will spend the next year waiting for it too#i thought i felt panic but i have decided to read it as anticipation. the thrill of rejection or of moving forward or the latter as#a result of the former. i left you with your backpack unattended in the cafe because on fridays i am done#putting my life on hold for another whim-without-a-warning#this cross country service is delayed by 26 minutes so i will grab a bucket and start shovelling the water away from the tracks#everyone is moving on in some different way and im sorry if you think im mean for telling you getting so drunk will disable you from#recording your brainwaves effectively but it seems like you think i owe you an awful lot. one year ago in four days my friend got me hegel's#science of logic for my birthday and i thanked him for proving to me the existence of things this is what i do he said#and then he will spend the rest of his life breathing philosophy and i dont want to spend the rest of my life#breathing someone elses dreams i wait for the moment of realisation. this is now a 30 minute delay. i was supposed to worship beautiful#things and that is what i will do. i think i have a best friend and i know i have a lover and i know to#restrict my love the way you have. im sorry. i hope you understand when i tell you. i am now sitting on the floor in the luggage section of#this incredibly busy train and i saw a photo of her with her boyfriend and her hair in braids smiling like a fool this is the#except a week ago you told me you almost took too much this time to live. you are a beautiful girl with a beautiful soul and you know you#have already changed the world and it somehow was not enough. now you are smiling without any makeup on next to him#and yesterday you cried in an airport in the states when you were too full of love. this is the most extraordinary human being i have met.#tomorrow he heads off to princeton while his best friend heads to harvard. he goes there to make the world a better place. he is the most#extraordinary person i have ever met. the issue with human beings is that we are incredibly good at almost dying and keeping going.#you try to kill yourself and publish a paper and give a talk. you negotiate the seperation between your own parents and submit another#phd application. i am surrounded by extraordinary people with extraordinary minds and incredibly broken happy hearts.#i only see you smile when you talk about robotics. i still dont know how manifolds work and i love the concept anyway. i dont know.#i do know that i refuse to live unsatisfied.#you can keep drinking. im going to drink this reality up#i think i was a horrible person and i refuse to engage with that mentality again no matter what it takes.
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i wanted to say thank you for your nice comment on my tamala gifset.. i was legit scared i'd get nothing but negative comments since the majority of fans seem to hate her
oh no problem! your set was beautiful!!
and yeah i get what you mean. i mean,, i guess i kind of understand the hate but some of it seems so,, weird too? like hassian is my favorite character my special little blorbo even, and tamala leading him on and breaking his heart like that sucks no doubt!! but also like,,, i support women's rights and women's wrongs!!! she's hot!!!!!
ajkdhg but seriously even beyond her being really attractive, i think she's also really interesting and i'm hoping that the devs have more planned for her! her using magic is SO interesting and i can't believe some people are ignoring that just because of what happened between her and hassian! i mean don't get me wrong, people are allowed to dislike characters, it's all fiction it's whatever yknow? but i also kind of thought people got past that whole "if a character is evil or morally not the best, that means you can't like them or you're fucked up" like,,, what happened to liking hot lady villains 🤨
#i mean she's not Really a villain but you get what i mean#i really really hope the devs dont change their plans for her just because people dont like her though#whether that means making her an actual villain or getting rid of any future plot lines with her#like... isolated witch in the woods using illegal magic you can't convince me she's not important to the story???#also not to be That person but some of it seems so misogynistic too like ajdhg#was leading him on wrong? absolutely! but did she need to commit to a relationship with a guy she didn't love? no???#its so weird to me that some people think she shouldve just agreed to be with him like dude...#answered#but anyway try not to worry so much!! ive seen a lot of tamala likers on tumblr!!#ive def seen some haters too to be fair but i feel like Most people will just ignore her content and not leave mean comments#unlike some places (ahem reddit)#im not saying that every single tamala hater is misogynistic btw im just saying some of the hate definitely is#i think since so many fans like hassian and we were introduced to him first its natural that people would prefer him#but the hate she gets for literally just.. wanting a fling is so weird#like its not her fault hassian falls hard?? and its not his fault that she doesn't??#could she have let him down nicely oh yeah def but she did Not need to just agree that logic is Insane to me#oh god im rambling now oops#aldgh#Anyway always happy to see another tamala enjoyer!!
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1. it’s my 24th birthday today, so my goal of being published by the time i’m 25 is now a one year looming monster, but i never specified what kind of published and am currently looking in various literary magazines that are recommended for writers who have yet to be published, so i’m surprisingly confident that i can make it work? and tbh even if whatever i write isn’t officially published before my 25th birthday, if i have someone in the process of being published then i’ll be happy!! no matter what though, i’m gonna try to be proud of myself for at least giving it my best shot!!
2. i honestly love that my birthday is on the ides of march because the ides of march meme shitposting is only a thing on tumblr but it also being my birthday makes it easier to like. be excited about the ides of march outside of tumblr. like even in person i can be like “it’s my birthday! i’m an ides of march babe (:” and if someone is like oh what’s that? or if they say something along the lines of oh like julius caesar? i can be like yep!! and even if it’s a small thing outside of tumblr it brings me immense enjoyment and amusement being able to bring it up off of tumblr
3. transportation situation has been very rough since june 2023 when i totalled my car, my gap insurance are being assholes and i ended up putting my foot down on the phone with them yesterday which i’m pretty proud of because i am NOT a confrontational person (something i’ve been working on this past year, so seeing some improvement with my ability to hold my ground and not be a pushover yesterday was very cool!!) i was told i’d get a response from them by friday next week no matter what, and if i don’t then friday of next week i will continue to wreak havoc upon them. but my moms car which i’ve been using since my accident broke down yesterday, hopefully it’s fixable but my parents were saying it might be done for, so trying to think of how i’m gonna get to work next week is kind of stressing me out lmao, but for now i’m just gonna focus on enjoying my birthday the best i can because i don’t want to start off being 24 with an overwhelming anxiety for something that won’t be a potential issue until monday. plus i already messaged my boss today to let her know that i’m going to do everything i can to make it work out but just so she’s in the loop and knows of the potential of me not being able to make my morning shifts (one of my coworkers said she’s more than happy to give me a ride for our afternoon shifts which does help relieve some of the stress!) and i told her i’d let her know for sure sunday so that if necessary she can have time to figure out someone to fill in for me in the mornings!
overall: life is weird and i ended being 23 yesterday with a shitty situation but a positive outlook and i am going to enjoy my first day of being 24 no matter what because honestly i fucking earned it. happy friday everyone, i hope it’s a good day for you and me both!
#aritalks#i did cry a little bit when i first woke up because i dont really know what to do about work and also i hate not having a car i can use#not only because of the work aspect but also getting my license when i was 18 gave me a freedom i didn’t have before#and i don’t like having to rely on other people just to like go to the fucking store or something yk#but then my best friend/roommate messaged me happy birthday and i was like fuck it! today is going to be a good day!#the stressful uncertainties can wait until tomorrow#also one of my best friends who hasn’t said happy birthday to me the past two years#(not intentionally im p sure they were just busy on my birthdays the past two years#and then had that moment of ‘oh shit i didnt send a message fuck i think its too late now’ which i totally get bc anxiety things yk)#was one of the first people to message me happy birthday!!#i’m also hoping to still be able to go see my mom and then stay the night at my dads tonight#so i can see both my parents and also my baby siblings for my birthday#my dads working today but after he texted happy birthday i sent him a text asking if he thinks we could still make it work#my mom is asleep still i think (she called me at midnight and left a voicemail singing happy birthday!! but her sleep schedule has been all#over the place recently so i’m waiting until 11:30 to call her which is in like 30 mins)#but she said something yesterday about driving out to me to give me a hug and also bring me my diabetes stuff that got delivered#(her house is my mailing address because i know it’s not going to change bc it’s my great grandparents house that she’s partially inhereting#when my great grandpa dies but since i have moved out of my dads my address has changed twice and i didnt have a mailbox at my last place so#just for the sake of consistency and not having to worry about important shit getting sent to the wrong address i’ve had her house as my#mailing address since i moved out of my dads at 19)#so i think i’m gonna ask her if she can just pick me up instead so i can go to her house w her and hang out with her#and hopefully my dad will be able to at least stop by with my siblings so i can see them too#i’d like to stay the night with them but if we can’t make it happen then i can also stay the night w my mom and hopefully tomorrow figure#out the car situation. might have to rent a car for a week if i can afford it? best case scenario is my moms car can be fixed but i still#dont know whats wrong with it ik there are two potential problems and one is fixable the other is not#the fixable one would cost like $150-$400 to fix depending on if we get a used part or a new one#if its $150-$200 ish i can probably afford to pay for the whole thing or at least most of it#but if its more than that hopefully my dad or one of my family members can help#and i can just pay them back in like $50 increments with my next few paychecks#just realized i said i wouldnt worry abt the car thing today and also i think im at tag limit to i’ll stop now lmao xoxo gossip girl ❤️
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WHAT THE HELL NOBODY EVER TOLD ME TWO OF MY FAVE VILLAGERS GOT A LINE STICKER TOGETHER. ive loved tabby for YEARS like since 2019 at LEAST. and these stickers are from 2018 how did i not know !!! i love tabby and boots so much 😭😭😭 TABBY AND BOOTS ANIMAL CROSSING I LOVE YOU SO MUCHHHHH OOMFS FOREVER AND EVER
#im so happy any official content of tabby is awesome shes my fave i looooove her so much SHES SO SILLY!!!#and boots was one of my starting residents on acnh so he holds a special place in my heart#in case anyone was wondering which im sure you were not. my other starting villager on acnh was rocket and shes soooo silly i love rocket#not enough people love her like shes so silly. u are all HATERS#anyway i love talking about my acnh villagers I WISH I HAD MY ACNL ONES WRITTEN DOWN. the only ones i remember are tabby and kyle#but my acnh ones atm (and when i say atm i mean they will be probably til the end of time)#are my guy sherb (found on one of the ticket islands)#stiches (who i also found on an island i think?)#chai (i have her amiibo card shes so cute.)#tammi (another island find)#stella (man i really did just take the first villagers i found on an island and kept them huh)#rocket and boots (starter villagers)#tabby (I WAS LOOKING FOR SOMEONE TO TRADE HER TO ME ON REDDIT I THINK? and then they were like oh if shes ur fave u can just have her +#like for free. AND THAT WAS SOOOO AWESOME)#bea (i think she was also a ticket island thingy find)#and finally... tom (ok he has a fun story.#i think it was margie who lived on my island at the time and listen she was SUCH a sweetheart i wanted to keep her forever#(she replaced drift who i found on an island and he was mean to me so i have beef with him. still. like four years later.)#but them tom showed up as a camper and i got this crazy hit of nostalgia and i remembered my guy tom was in my childhood city folk town#and i was like. I MISS MY BOY. COME BACK TO ME. so he moved in)#umm only other villager we had was chadder which i think my little brother picked when we shared the island#i think i remember him saying he got chadder because of dantdm...? i dont remember the details#but i got the sanrio amiibo cards which i need to stress i had wanted for YEARS. i was so fucking happy when they got a rerelease#to the point where like. i couldnt get them at first because they sold out super fast. so#i bought them from someone in twitter dms im so serious. and it fucking worked thats how i got them#anyway i wanted chai to move in because shes my fave of that set (i love cinnamoroll) but i needed someone to move out#which i always get so sad about :( but my brother offered to take chadder so i felt a little better abt it#and then i think we forgot to like. have him come get chadder in boxes. so chadder went off somewhere hope hes living a good life#thats it i think. i wish i kept a list of all my villagers ever but considering ive been playing for a decade or so now that would be. crazy#muffin mumbles
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we haven't spoken in a very long time, but i dreamt of you last night, so I couldn't help but think of you. I'm not sure you remember me, but i hope life is treating you well these days. take care.
I'm not sure what to say, but I can promise you I have not forgotten you. My time on Tumblr has been a mess full of hiatuses, I admit, but it will always be a place where I met some very wonderful friends, including you. With 100% honesty, I can say the friends I made here are some of the best friends I have ever had, even though most of us don't talk anymore.
It doesn't matter how often I speak with people, or if we never speak again. I'll always remember you, and I'll always think fondly of you and hope that life is treating you gently and kindly.
I hope you had a nice (or at the very least an okay) dream, and I'm glad to know you still remember me, too, regardless of all else.
Take care, love <3
#it will always amaze me#how the little details in a message can speak such volumes#you dont think of it at the time but the way someone speaks and their writing style really is so unique#im sorry if the message got a little bit general in the middle but i really do mean it#i remember every friend i ever made here. i still check up on a lot of them when i can#its not about talking so much as it is knowing you are all alive and well#and it makes me really sad whenever i stumble across a deactivated account#i miss you though and i hope you are in a better place now#i hope i wasnt annoying in your dream#and i appreciate the bravery it took for you to reach out and check up on me#also i just want to throw out there that i dont find the dream thing weird or anything#some people get creeped out by that but ive actually had three or four people mention i was in their dreams#so its just something im vaguely used to that does not bother me or anything#a guy told me he dreamed we were in a haunted house and i just kept telling him 'its fine dont worry'#and honestly thats pretty accurate. cant complain#anyway~ i hope you are well#i hope you are happy and if you are not happy today i hope you will be happy soon#and however that dream may have gone i hope you have better dreams going forward#beautiful anon#neo answers#ask neo
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not excited for the live action to white wash gan and give the fandom even more of an excuse to white wash gan because white washing is already such a problem in this fandom, a 'canon' source doing it is just going to make it worse
please just make him a pig i am begging for him to be a pig i am begging
#probably delete later but like#ngl lmao im being so vague i don't want to rain on peoples parades#but my tears buzz was burned a bit by casting matt for gan#i know people were so pumped about that and im so happy for all of you who were but like#gan is not white lmao#gan is not white its kind of crucial to his entire character that he is not white#it's kind of a big deal actually that he's not white and the rest of his people its kind of The Whole Thing#and then just idk how one dimensional they've been going with gan and the rest of his people.....the movie being animated#would at least possibly have been something gorgeous to look at#it being live action just fills me with dread lmao#i hope he's a pig i am begging for them to make him a pig#then they can't white wash him#i don't need to see that if i wanted to see that i'd just go in his tag for two seconds and find someone's fan casting or good guy au#because he apparently cannot be arab and african and also be a good guy#rant over im going back under my rock#fabtalks#fab talks#literally just let him be a pig lets just go back and do that
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fictional parents. yes i will analyze them in a way that is true to canon and not in the way that mirrors what my relationship to my Own parents is like, currently. surely not
#this is about bg3 ulder ravengard but it applies elsewhere too 😭#im very much in the phase of my life where im starting to understand my parents as human beings and it's been. interesting#you still failed me and you refuse to acknowledge the hurt you dealt to me. but it's crazy that i still want you in my life#you would never be happy for me if i were truly at my happiest. while im hurt and disappointed about that. im my own person and so are you#idk it's strange. human beings are messy and complicated while fictional characters are comparatively less so#but. arent they? they're not real people so theyre reflections of whoever wrote them as well as what everyone who plays the game interprets#maybe i do see my mom and dad in him. maybe while i wish they'd acknowledge the sheer level of hurt they dealt to me---#---i also hope i can at least. in words. get what wyll got from ulder if he asks his son for forgiveness#tyto speaks#PARDON ME. IM IN A MOOD
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Probably not very enriching but I wanted to say that you are a really awesome artist and your work brings people (or at least me and my friends) a lot of joy. You have an amazing gift, the ability to create, and you use it for wonderful silly things and it improves the world just by helping people feel better. Also thank you for providing the Aoki likers sustenance, you are our savior.
'not very enriching' TO YOU im fuckin cryin scoob
#fave#snap chats#i escaped the basement :)#BUT ALSO THIS IS SO SWEET AWRHFHALKJ#i know people like my stuff one way or another but it is alwasy really nice to get stuff like this#i always hold em close to me chest and think of em whenever im down an out#im glad my silly stuff gets to bring people together :') for better or worse :')#even if not and people are just enjoyin my stuff alone or in silence that makes me just as happy too#as long as i get to make one person happy then i've done enough for the day thats all i ever hope to do with my goofy postings#and of course... if i dont provide aoki enjoyers food who will.....#probably would be better if it were no one but its too late ive latched onto him and he's a parasite in my brain now
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Hahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha
The guy Im talking to just checked himself into a psych ward.
Fuck my life
#no but seriously I’m happy that if he felt like he had to go that he went#it was just very out of the blue#cause he was at drill#and he was supposed to be there until 4#and we were talking earlier and he seemed fine#and god I figured he probably had some trauma to heal from#but he said he was okay#and I didnt want to push him to talk about stuff he wasnt ready for#and god I just hope he is okay#cause even besodes the fact that weve been talking he is such a good friend and has always been there for me#and anyways Im only a little freaking out because he also did this while I was out of town#but he said that he was putting my number on the list of people he can call if he gets time#so I guess I just wait now#and yeah#fuck
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