me when i see magnets repel each other: omg…., anthytouga…

trying to write anything about anthy and touga is always objectively hilarious (lie, but only kind of) bc you always end up at the same place which is just like. these guys aren’t learning shit from each other. they will NOT be self-recognising through the other today thank uuuu and even if they did, literally nothing would happen. theyd just be like yep! knew that! anyway! and then continue to perpetuate cycles of abuse they believe to be inevitable for their slightly different reasons because ‘truly swagever’ — anthy and touga, probably. these guys don’t give a shit about each other but also they make each other want to die. hope this helps!

kiryuu sibling stasis post-32 is so interesting to me. nanami tries to leave and is (temporarily but also, crucially, violently) prevented from doing so by touga and akio. after this experience she puts distance between herself and them: she leaves touga’s phone in the car, she resigns from the student council (though she dons her old uniform still), she repeatedly dismisses and undermines the authority of the rose code, of end of the world, of akio, of touga. but she’s still in ohtori, isn’t she? uncomfortable with the idea of leaving, uncertain if it’s really possible. she tried before, and it hurt her. deeply. it’s so interesting to me, nanami’s agency and how she limits her exertion of it after 32, when she realises it for what it is. contrast that with touga, who accepts this weird stalemate between them, who is, really, uninterested in having any relationship of any kind with nanami if he can’t gain something from her. he’s very passive with her after 32, compared to the passivity he’d always feigned towards her before in order to stoke reactions from her and then exploit them. i was thinking about how touga has always been able to sever his relationship with nanami, but chosen not to; first out of a sense of obligation (‘we should live to help each other’) then a realisation of how that could be exploited. i was thinking about how nanami has never realised her ability to leave, in part because it is limited by touga and the harm he does her. i was thinking about the desperation and confusion akio calls out to anthy with as she leaves. i was thinking about how different that is to the kiryuus’ strange semi-breakdown; touga doesn’t want or need nanami, and nanami might love her brother but she cannot trust him or feel safe around him, doesn’t want to see him anymore; she’s itching to leave, and just a little scared (you know, because last time she tried that her brother assaulted her), and he’s not doing anything because ignoring her means he doesn’t have to deal with the emotions of her leaving or staying. something something gendered power dynamics something something tragic siblings

everyone reading atr for the first time vs me who read it for the first time three years ago and has been insane about it ever since. (guy who loves the painting motif) the paintings!!!!!!! also i think it’s neat that akio and ruka die again even if juri’s chapter is a bit wobbly wrt dunking on that guy. i dont consider it canon in the strictest sense, primarily bc if touga was 37 years old before he had an ounce of growth it would kill me, but i think its ideas and messaging are largely scrumptious. i deeply enjoy the baby-utena-spectre thing and the utena-prince thing and how transparently and directly the stuco’s perceptions and understandings of who utena was have shaped them; in turn, how that has trapped some remnant of utena in ohtori, as ‘prince’. also shout-out anthy bc the way she functions in atr ohhhhhh it makes me crazy. what chiho saito says about not seeing an aged up utenanthy about seeing only a previous form of themselves that maybe isn’t all that real at all, ohhhhhhh it’s incredible 10/10 no notes on that front for me. we’re still storytelling within ohtori and that is sososososo important. it’s not as good as the movie manga imho, but atr is like. it just holds a special place in my heart for being such a compelling and mixed bag of Stuff. great food for thought. i think everyone should read it honestly im baffled that people are choosing not to

ohhhh and suddenly everything is different now. if you even care. they have looked at each other. btw. looking and seeing and perceiving and understanding as my absolute favourite things in rgu. bearing witness to things. knowing. having the illusion of knowledge or understanding. attempting to unpick what is and isn’t valuable, what we do and don’t understand. watching a play and wondering who produced it. nakedness and clothes and costumes and how they all pertain to this truth/untruth dichotomy that is absolutely not a dichotomy whatsoever. did you guys know i really like aou’s painting motif btw

on the subject of rgu and intelligence, i love how there really is no way to determine who the “smartest” character in utena is. like you can obviously identify who the most knowledgeable characters are, but it’s not a matter of “being intelligent,” it’s a matter of being privy to information. utena and miki are good at school, but they’re naive. juri and saionji are cynics who understand the limitations of the system, but nonetheless situate themselves within it because they lack the potential to imagine an alternative. nanami implicitly understands that something is distinctly wrong, and does try to extricate herself from the system, but she also doesn’t know that cowbells are for cows or that girls don’t lay eggs.

anthy is functionally the smartest character (among the children) because she’s always (at least) one step ahead of everyone else and understands the rules of her world, but she only truly becomes the “smartest” character once she leaves. because “intelligence” is arbitrary and constructed. it’s what you do with the information you’ve actually been presented with, how you respond to the events you’ve witnessed, that truly matters. and even then, knowing is only one side of the coin. nanami, saionji, juri, touga, akio, and anthy all logically understand how the system harms them as well as others. but the potential to imagine a better future is what is truly spectacular and groundbreaking—revolutionary, in fact—and that’s something utena and anthy achieve, not through the capacity of their minds, but through the strength of their hearts.

whenever i talk about touga it really is like yeah i hate him so much it hurts he made me realise more things about myself and the world than i care to mention. if you dont believe in his ability to leave ohtori i will blow this whole pocket-dimension academy up i stg

trying to write something about how much i hate the ‘misandry in utena/the utena fandom’ crowd but it feels kind of redundant to me. i think i just don’t consider people who use the word ‘misandry’ serious people. i do however feel an obligation to occasionally make my position clear on that front, because im aware i tougapost and some people love to bring that guy up as the misandry in the utena fandom poster boy. which is so fucking stupid because touga is not victimised by ‘misandry’, touga is victimised by homophobic violence which is wrapped up in misogynistic violence, both of which are the cogs in the machine we call patriarchy. touga is not affected by misogyny in the same way that anthy is, that’s one of the key takeaways you can get from their being foils, and i don’t really like the whole ‘oh patriarchy hurts men too’ stuff because it neglects the fact that men reap so many material benefits from what some people deem ‘harm’ to them (emotional repression being the big one. it’s not great but when you’re the privileged party and gain power from it, who cares? it’s like the inverse of kozue trying to use sexuality to gain power: she can’t do that). but touga is a shitty dysfunctional person who has been shaped by violence and in turn perpetuated violence, and his character excels, imho, at examining how patriarchy functions and attempts to homogenise life’s many complexities. same deal as nanami really. they just play different roles in this gender essentialist nightmare that crunches out any grit. and you can extend that idea to all rgu characters but i am who i am and that is a kiryuu siblings enjoyer

of all the things one can say about episode 33, one ive been thinking about a lot recently is disrupted sleep. like, the day/night cycle and character's sleep schedules alike are being messed with here. akio's fucked up endless highway is perpetually night, so that certainly contributes to it, but i just think-- there is something so viscerally upsetting to me about spending the day at an amusement park, going to bed in a hotel, and being driven home from that hotel when it is still dark. you know? i thought about anthy's disrupted sleep in the black rose arc too, and how akio wakes utena in the car by brushing her cheek. that idea of being in and out of sleep, of not getting enough of it... and then the (family) day-out nature of this trip to the hotel, the way utena is so thoroughly positioned as a child in this episode. what if i got stabbed to death by some swords real quick

[ID: ten shots from 'revolutionary girl utena' with excerpts of black text edited onto them. the first is of akio embracing utena in the duelling arena, holding her sword and talking down to her. utena is wearing a princess dress. text reads: 'and lot's wife, of course, was told not to look back where all those people and their homes had been.'

utena prying open the coffin behind the rose gate. text reads: 'but she did look back,'

anthy staring up at utena from within her coffin, her expression confused. text reads: 'and i love her for that,'

utena smiling at anthy inside her coffin, tears in her eyes. text reads: 'because it was so human.'

the swords of hatred pulsing towards utena as she lies defeated on the ground. text reads: 'so she was turned to a pillar of salt. so it goes.'

utena and anthy's hands being wrenched apart. text reads: 'people aren't supposed to look back.'

anthy about to leave ohtori, smiling and wearing her pink outfit. text reads: 'i’m certainly not going to do it anymore. i’ve finished my war book now. the next one i write is going to be fun. this one is a failure, and had to be, since it was written by a pillar of salt. it begins like this:'

young anthy hanging limply as the swords of hatred protrude from her body. she is sihloutted against a red background. text reads: 'listen: billy pilgrim has come unstuck in time.'

a photo of utena and anthy, in which akio has been cropped out, sitting in a pink frame upon a table. there is also a pink rose frame around the shot. text reads: 'it ends like this:'

a close-up of the photo, still with the pink rose frame, in which utena and anthy are tentatively holding hands. text reads: 'poo-tee-weet?' /end ID]

revolutionary girl utena (1997) / kurt vonnegut, slaughterhouse 5

hi!! i know u talk a lot about aromanticism a lot on here, but i don’t think i’ve ever seen u talk about aromantic anthy. would u mind discussing/elaborating on it or linking to a post where u do because i’m very curious!!

i got a similar ask half a year ago or something ridiculous like that on my main blog, but i’d like to really do justice to my url right now and explain it in more concrete terms.

i will say, it’s important to bear in mind that this reading of anthy’s character is very much informed by my own experiences, and a lot of those experiences are ones im not keen to talk in depth about. but you know. let’s make some nebulous gestures towards ideas of being traumatised, being autistic, struggling to meaningfully connect with others and honestly not really wanting to do such because of how they treat you.

like ive previously said, an aromantic perspective on the world would, i think, really benefit anthy. when youve lived your whole life experiencing violence at the hands of these patriarchal structures, of which romance is absolutely one, it’s kinda like. damn. im uncomfortable buying into those ideas.

anthy also has this lovely line in ep 19 where she says to utena ‘romance either happens or it doesn’t’ and it’s just sooooooo. so very interesting to me, actually, that anthy would say something so black and white about ‘romance’, a topic that anthy knows better than a lot of rgu characters is hopelessly confused and arbitrary and often enabling violence. and utena (fellow aromantic gaybo) says 'yeah, i know, but...'. these simplifications, these elisions. what is and isn't articulated. but what? maybe things are much more complicated than we'd like to think.

anyway enough of that tangent. one thing i as a trans and aromantic person always return to when discussing trans and aromantic readings of characters/texts more broadly is that there's no singular piece of evidence that can really cement these readings as Undeniable. it's like. okay. there's a critique of romance as a patriarchal structure in revolutionary girl utena. there's an ambiguity about anthy's feelings towards characters like utena, where there is clearly a queer connection but it takes shape in unconventional and complex ways. me, i'm aromantic, i see all of these pieces and i go oh well that's because she's an aromantic lesbian. you know, there's plenty of little moments i can evidence but those moments can be used to argue for an alloromantic lesbian anthy too. romance is a very arbitrary thing and i think everyone should take their own approach to it unapologetically. of course, mine is that it's hellish and i want nothing to do with it, but im just one guy. and im okay with that. i feel strongly about this reading and it is personal, and id be dishonest to say otherwise, but i do also find that it's well-evidenced in the text. as one of my lecturers once said, don't worry about authorial intent, it isn't real <3

i love how fraught and complicated discourse around various utena characters ‘dying’ is when anthy is literally stabbed to death eternally by a million swords imbued with human hatred. and then utena gets stabbed to death by them also. like. ‘death’ is incredibly interesting in rgu because most of the time it’s this ambiguous figurative thing that has interesting implications re: ohtori as a closed-off world one can escape. we are all trapped in our coffins. mamiya is the only named character with a grave. nemuro memorial hall functions as one all the same. ruka is implied to have died in the hospital— was he dead all along? who was the boy we saw for these two episodes? is this dead boy the same boy, or is this just another coincidence from the shadow girls, cutting like a knife? it’s heavily implied that akio and anthy murder kanae by poisoning her, adding to the previous implication that they were poisoning mr ohtori too, but there are no perceptible consequences of this. kanae’s absence is not felt. she’s fed an apple slice. what happens to the bodies? we know what happened to the 100 boys, but what about everyone else? and so on and so forth. ‘death’ is a tricky thing in utena, i think it’s constantly functioning on figurative and literal levels in very different ways for very different purposes. dios died. dios was dying. dios didn’t die. he grew up. etc etc

so basically revolutionary girl utena is the best show ever made because it has themes of family abolition and is a critique of amatonormativity and also has a lot to say about how those things are not two separate issues but are in fact very much connected

ive been thinking a lot recently about nanami omitting touga’s blood type from her conversations in the first half of her tragedy, including with touga: ‘mother is type b, and so is father, and so am i! the whole family is!’ like. you know the basic observation to make is that this is a classic nanami subconscious moment, where she knows there is something strange about her brother’s blood type and it isn’t just him being a ‘typical perfectionist’ (love that line from her btw; interesting critique of her brother), but she’s not going to reveal that insecurity to keiko and co. unless absolutely pressed. and obviously that’s when she’s unable to ignore that strangeness any longer.

i digress, doing this to touga is fucking bonkers to me. like, she’s covering up something that keiko and co don’t know. touga knows what his own blood type is. and to be clear, i understand why nanami does this, in a way it’s an extension of what’s going on with the girls, it’s her covering up, compensating, obscuring something that might complicate things, but i just think it’s soooooooo fucking significant and interesting. the whole family is. one of my big things about 32 is how interesting it is that touga tries to suggest to keiko that nanami was adopted (‘a common, boring girl’), enshrining himself as the biological son and erasing the implication that his status is unstable. like, obviously both the kiryuu siblings are adopted but the understanding in 31 and 32 is that touga was adopted. this is the revelation that undoes nanami. not being related to her brother, who is not as perfect and untouched as he once seemed. no pictures of him as a baby. nothing. nothing at all. so it’s interesting to me that the fourth scene in 31 is one where nanami aligns herself so closely with their parents. like. we’ve never seen her do that before. she doesn’t remember what they look like, she doesn’t speak of them, all her love and all of her care is for touga. ‘his smile was for me and me alone’. i don’t know!! it’s a really interesting moment and i just think it’s neat!!!!! the whole family is.

being gay and aromantic is wild because people will accuse you of hating gay people because you (checks notes) wish people would be a little more critical of romance as a patriarchal structure. the thing is that rgu literally does this, it examines and interrogates how romance is a patriarchal structure. every time i talk about aromanticism in rgu people get very upset about that, as though aromanticism impedes queerness— i did not realise we were still doing exclusionism so bare faced. every time i talk about aromanticism, people get upset. im not even talking about it in relation to the show, instead making a general throwaway post about the weight that people afford anything that deals in Romance, and i get told that rgu is a romance and i should cry about it. like. what? rgu made me realise i was aromantic. i was already gay and that gave me the final piece of the puzzle.

to be gay and aromantic does not mean you Just Have Friends (? what does this even mean, let’s unpack this statement at a later date): to be gay and aromantic means myriad things for myriad people. it means queer sex, it means queer connections that aren’t defined as ‘romantic’, it means queer attraction, it means queer understanding. nothing about this devalues romantic queerness, though i must say that every time i post about aromanticism someone has to qualify my words with a statement about how romance is cool too. and sure, it is, but you can maybe understand how that’s exhausting when you actually want a meaningful conversation about your identity. anyway aromantic people i love you aromantic people and gay people i love you gay people (i am both. godbless goodnight)

no more after the revolution criticism after the revolution has everything one could want ever: juri serving looks. saionji shaking touga like a chew toy. godbless goodnight