and they were little horsies.....

silly doodle of bishop hawkes evil love triangle that i hate but they are pon e

bit of thinking outloud but for my current tactician run im doing a special wyll origins playthrough im calling the Evil Wyll Run & it’s given me a lot of food for thought about his character (or at least the freedom of psychological movement + exploration afforded to an origin run!)

wyll spoilers abound we’re entering the wyllenium here

wyll always felt a bit underwritten to me - i know that’s partially because there was that big kerfuffle in the 11th hour with changing his whole story and personality on top of having to recast his VA, and frankly hats off to both original VA lanre malaolu & new VA theo solomon for their hard work - both brought tremendous performances, & i sincerely hope mr malaolu was paid well for his work & time even if his voice wasn’t used in the final cut (i would also say warlock as a class itself felt a bit underdeveloped but im 100% OK with chalking that up to me the player not understanding how to play warlock effectively yet lol im more of a fighter barbarian Hit Stuff guy)

but honestly this feeling of being “underwritten” combined with a character with a long history of heroism in his pocket made wyll really interesting to me even in my tav playthrough. for all his accomplishments he still feels like a blank everyman, or like he’s someone who fully believes he’s the main character who doesn’t “need” to do any extra work on himself - and honestly he feels Very much like he could be The Main Character. once his backstory of the son of the duke was revealed too i immediately got the sense of like, rich boy trying to prove his worth beyond his wealth and status by striking out & becoming that hero, or that Prince Charming. basically that perfect happily ever after somebody. and im of the opinion that you don’t get mixed up with a cambion in the first place unless you’re either the kind of naïve “everything will just work out” immature that tends to comes with his status as the son of a noble, or you’re hungering for power. depending on playstyle he’s very easily both of these things

on the naïve front (ie a good wyll playthrough) if anything he feels very believably immature, & from that perspective the events of the game feel as though they’re the prequel to the actual start of wyll's story where he finally finds himself & learns what kind of man he really is. we just dont get to see it alas, but i really enjoyed the thought exercise of somebody still grappling with overcoming his own immaturity. he feels like someone who can still grow and that his tale is just beginning

Evil Wyll (meaning any time mizora shows up he drops everything to enact her instruction & hasnt once tried to find a loophole out of his contract) which ive come to be far more fascinated by is someone clearly vying for power, which is interesting because his noble status would’ve given him all the power he wants had he Played Nice. to me it speaks of someone who wants to be able to take what he wants from life without it being handed to him, which contrasts in a really fascinating way with entering into a warlock pact at all. maybe he thought it was better that it be a decision he made as opposed to nobility given to him by his family ties, maybe there’s still that pollyanna sentiment of “it’ll just work out & ill live happily ever after.” again maybe both. maybe in a sense the fiend, as he calls himself, is a good excuse to shuck off any poor decision he makes or any genuinely heinous thing he does under mizora’s instruction - an identity he uses as power fantasy (and very much in tandem/interchangeable with the blade of frontiers power fantasy) until it means taking ownership for any of his misdeeds, and then a scapegoat.

may be a bit incoherent but im only now hitting act 3 in my origin run & im Really enjoying this difficult characterization ive cooked up for myself lol

I NEED YOUR HELP SO BADLY 😭

Okay so last year I was bored and shi and was just watching yandere vn playthroughs from Your Game on my chrome book (I downloaded the videos and stuff) and there was this one where you had a boyfriend, I forgot what his name was but it wasn't an American name, basically he fucking dies i think and MC gets kidnapped at one part? They find a wall of pictures with them in them (I THUNK, I skipped most of it cause ADD and now I hate myself for it.) MC gets exhausted or smth happens and they collapse but then the ghost of the boyfriend is like "yooooo get up and all that good stuff, comfort comfort" and then the yandere is some type of yandere demon that looks like darkiplier (im not joking he does) and in his end you basically submit to him after he brings you to the VOID and you give him what he wanted. Also you find out the boyfriend died by coming home and seeing MINE (I think) written on the wall in blood.

I have searched FAR AND WIDE looking for this game but can't find it, it had a similar art style to My Darling so I tried seeing they made it but NOPE.

AND I CANT FIND THE VIDEO CAUSE I DELETED IT FROM GOOGLE DRIVE FOR STORAGE AND IM GONNA CRY I WANT IT SO BADLY PLEASE GIVE ME YOUR KNOWLEDGE 🛐😭

Whoa, okay, that’s a lot of info, but I think the game you’re talking about is Love Me Dearly?

From what I remember, the MC doesn't have a boyfriend (at least from what I remember), but she and the pink haired guy, Takuma (non American name) did have a history together that the MC doesn't remember, but Takuma does.

The MC gets trapped (not kidnapped) by the other male yandere Asurio and if the MC does submit to them you give him the box that he wanted. Takuma also does the comfort comfort thing with the MC when they're trapped together and at the end.

Hopefully, this is the game that you were talking about? I'll have to contemplate on it harder if it isn't. It's a pretty good game because it's very different from a lot of yandere vns that I've played and there's a lot more problem solving and mysterious intrigue that made it pretty memorable to me.

YOUR FANCLANS ARE SO COOL!!!! i cant wait to see more of them omg! could you share some more on the clairvoyants/prophets and their pilgrimages up the mountain? :o also, did you have anywhere specific in colorado in mind when mapping? it looks gorgeous! and i love the landmark names omg, how'd you come up with those? sorry for all the questions im just very excited about these guys!

YAY thank you so much that means a ton! you're enabling my infodumping I'm about to write 1500 words (serious). Don't ever worry about asking too many ST questions it's all i think about.

Here's a MSPAINT doodle of the girls. hope nothing bad ever happens to them

easy questions first!

ST's set in the northern Colorado Rockies where they border the Great Plains. Somewhere unpopulated in the northern Front Range!

Landmark names are usually named after past leaders/healers/deputies of the Clans, who I just made up on the spot (except I have a Blizzard playthrough on Clangen so I used some of those leaders and important cats.) To come up with a lot of the names I researched local fauna. Colorado has a LOT of elk and a lot of large carnivores! Summer Thunder has a storm motif (did you know) so a lot of the place names have to do with that

I'm going to go ahead and put the Clairvoyant/Prophet stuff under a cut because I write headcanons as I go and it gets so lengthy lol.

SORRY IN ADVANCE. this is like 3/4 just for me so i can put it in my document

Clairvoyants are the cats who would have "a strong connection to StarClan" in canon text. StarClan (usually called the Stars in-universe) are not an explicit thing or confirmed. There is something spiritual going on, but it's a lot more like a Primal Force than it is "My Dead Aunt Says Hello To Me In My Dreams." The technical name for cats who are tuned in to this spirituality is "Clairvoyants", though it's an ambiguous label and not something that ever puts cats into a group. Most cats aren't clairvoyant or are to a very low degree (this works since level of clairvoyance in any universe doesn't affect how much you believe in a higher power).

Prophets, a role found only in StormClan, are kind of like canon Medicine Cats except I separated the role into its composite Prophet and Healer. Some cats are both, in which case they'll call themselves whichever one makes more sense - usually Prophet because it's rarer and so it can feel closer to your identity. A Prophet is sort of like how Ancient Greek Oracles were. They are rare and usually have a medium to extremely high level of Clairvoyance. (ex. Leafpool, Goosefeather.) Their role, like medcats, is to speak as the Stars' voice and share wisdom with the Clan. The Stars do not "give prophecies" in the literal sense that they do in canon - cats interpret things how they will, like we would in real life. It's easy to think of an omen or prophecy if you want to hear one.

Storm cats just take it really seriously because they REALLY love the Stars. They have a higher genetic predisposition of Clairvoyants, so they have become really connected to spirituality and piety. They believe in fate and destiny and will use the Stars to justify any achievement. Naming ceremonies often go like "You are so lucky to be blessed by the Stars with such amazing jumping skills - your new name will be Pigeonleap." (Maybe Pigeonleap just got really good at jumping because he trained for his entire apprenticeship. It doesn't matter. It's the Stars.)

Pilgrimages, which I may start calling something cool (like the Prophet's Ascent maybe?) are taken by aspiring Prophets when they want to prove their connection to the Stars. Prophets are usually apprenticed to someone who is also Clairvoyant/a Prophet or a Healer if there isn't one. When they reach the end of their apprenticeship they are sent to hike Cloud's Tooth via Thunder Ridge/Lightning Point. Usually their mentor will follow them as far as the path from the Ridge up to Lightning Point (I'm thinking this is like a day's hike), but the mentor in most cases has already done the hike and is not interested in doing it again.

Cloud's Tooth is tall (probably around 9-11,000ft???) and not too forgiving. Cats are sent when the weather is predicted to be good, but anyone who's been to the Rockies knows that can change in about five minutes. The Clans are crepuscular in my universe like regular cats, so, in the interest of safety, cats usually just try to hike the mountain during the day. It can be 7-9 hours to the summit. They spend the night at the top and the Stars speak to them (whatever that means for the particular cat.) No one else except Prophets hikes this mountain, not even people - it's rocky, without water in most places, and very windy. And slick when wet. And worse when snowy. And you'll notice all the surrounding landmarks have something to do with storms.

That being said - a cat who makes it up and down again is pretty much guaranteed the Prophet role. Otherwise, they probably just fell to Stardom down a scree slope.

i saw someone use this picrew (https://picrew.me/en/image_maker/1564386) to try recreating their tavs, and i wanted to give it a try (possibly also because im too lazy to draw them) in spirit of bg3 being released :D mind you these won't all be 100% accurate to in-game appearance but close enough alongside my personal envisions

i've only played as one of them in early access,, i may or may not have taken the time to plan the rest of my tavs for future gameplays LMAO yes i am that kind of person when it comes to rpgs🫡 the common thread between all of them is feeling out of place, and how each of them deal with it in their own ways

ismene farahani-diamandis (she/her) my chaotic good human sorcerer in wild magic (i'm thinking about multiclassing paladin for her but idkk), my first tav and honestly kind of my favorite :') even created a backstory for her parents too. a catastrophe in more ways than one, but truly one of the most caring and fun-loving people, like a disney princess but just a bit more disastrous. a bit of a dreamer who longs to be loved and have adventure like the heroes in stories told by her father, but has often felt she cannot have both or either whether it was due to the utter though consistent bad luck when she tried or feelings of unworthiness because of others even when they did her wrong (aka a list of exes). she has lost most of her family outside her younger, paladin brother and distant noble family in mulmaster, who she has no interest in reaching after her mother's departure as a young adult with her father (it's a very long story involving a rogue noble and a wizard from a family of barbarians). first it was her father from an incident causing his memory then life to be slowly eaten away, her younger sister the one time she was far from home to a village raid, then her own mother the minute she garnered a name for herself as a hero amongst the people. she has since felt a lost sense of purpose, having no family or loved ones to put first having been the eldest sibling for so long, and strong guilt in wanting to pursue more with the unpredictable yet wondrous abilities she was born with, as she has felt she has failed to use them to save precious lives time and time again

even so, ismene is someone who chooses and wants to do good or the best possible thing no matter what challenge stands ahead and hopes that despite everything, she can find a way to be her happy, flirty self once again. trying to make the most of the brain worm situation and genuinely aspires to befriend all in her party, even though most of them prove difficult. lucky for her, if shes anything, shes stubborn enough to keep trying anyways in her newfound but chaotic family--it's almost refreshing to be in a band of fellow disasters. really stuck on either astarion or halsin for her romance because i think story-wise, her and astarion in my brain just are really interesting dynamically and have been in EA, but halsin would probablyyy be her most ideal partner (cause she honestly deserves at least one stable part in her life LMAO) but HEY---MAYBE THEY CAN POLY *if* larian allows it, her mbti/enneagram is ENFP 7w6

amée tanor'thal (she/her) will be my second playthrough, a neutral good seladrine drow cleric of selûne in the life domain. her backstory is probably my favorite amongst everyone, she's actually the mother of my first and only d&d character that i got to play about a year ago now :D i already had her story in mind alongside her daughter (obviously), and thought bg3 would be a good opportunity to play as her. she's always been more reserved and cautious in nature, someone who always tries to consider things beyond how they're presented in front of her. the inquisitiveness is what led her to learn more beyond her corrupt family, religion, and the normalized suffering within her home at the tanor'thal manor in skullport, she went through a lot to escape from it. initially, it was her and a group of hidden eilistraee followers in the city who she planned an escape route with, amée had met them through a boy around her age that she befriended on one of her secret escapades. they opened her to the possibility of a world filled with joy---with light, a life that the underdark, her own family would consume and make impossible for anyone to have. unfortunately, the heavy security made the journey abruptly take a turn for the worse. amée wound up separated from everyone as they continued the planned path, whilst she wound up chased by her own family on a completely different one; she barely escaped with her life. she followed a path of stars, scared and unsure, and it wound up leading her to a church of selûne in waterdeep where she was kindly taken in for sanctuary.

upon learning more and speaking with the clerics and daily visitors, choosing to serve her and the philosophy of having choice and helping to guide those who are lost, amée is a rare and often misunderstood person in the church. it is something she is aware of but is far more concerned in carving a path of peace for all those who need it---especially misunderstood folk of the underdark. despite her gloomy appearance, she is easily one of the most compassionate souls, one who has sworn to devote her life to healing instead of hurting, though she may or may not have had to kill off most of the family sent to the surface to take her life, including her own mother. needless to say, she'll spill a bit of blood here and then and maybe roll with all the evil goons who give her easy access because they think she's evil too. she's a bit funny and often direct, albeit unintentionally. anywho, she'll be romancing gale, who will not only engage her in intelligent conversation but in a child-like wonder through magic after devoting much of her life to her personal cause. i also feel like his romance route has the potential to be veryy angsty cause of his magic chest bomb so. sorry amée. her mbti/enneagram is an INFJ 1w2 :)

fynn tranquilfoot (they/them) will be my third playthrough, a true neutral rock gnome monk specializing in the way of the shadow. from a relatively normal family in comparison to a lot of my own characters tbh LOL, they stem from a gunsmith family business that has flowed for generations in a city full of fellow gnome entrepreneurs and inventors. fynn never flowed well with it and was rather easily overwhelmed by it at an early age. as a kid they expressed no genuine interest in anything really, and instead preferred doing nothing, so long as they were allowed to be alone. it was something that did not sit well with their family. fynn was to carry the mantle of their success, history, and more children to keep things going, which did not, in fact, sit well with them no matter how many of their peers in the same family dynamic gushed about their shared lifestyles and destinies. it was yet another thing they could not relate to, among other things being thrust upon them as labels they never asked for; fynn quickly became the talk of their town. they never cared to argue against them or their parent's complaints; "better to play dead to stay alive", then nothing could truly nag at them. however, if there was something that gnawed at them at all, it was a distinct lack of purpose. they had spent so long doing nothing to the point it almost felt depressing to not be really good at anything; it was one boat ride away that allowed fynn to venture around the mainland and see entirely different things.

one day they saw a monk stealing a noble of all they had in only five seconds, asked how they could do what they did and the rest is history. they went to the same temple, learned the same techniques, and found they were quite good at all of it. fynn knew that sometimes the assassination gigs weren't the most morally correct, or that even when it was they wouldn't get any credit for the deed, and they were content with that. fynn is not someone who has any desire to be remembered and is passionate about the life they've led for themselves and protecting that peace it gave them. they're a rather smart and self-aware individual, and quite understanding as they're not very judgemental. isn't opposed to knowing their party, but has no plans of sticking around at the end either, while the parasites possible power to heighten their prowess at work is intriguing, they're aware that trusting its stability in the long run is likely dumb (but somehow they aren't exactly opposed). plan to romance them with wyll : ) i think his desire to have purpose vs. their lack of desire for one will somehow end up complimenting and opening each other up. their mbti/enneagram is ISTP 9w8

meet magdalena (or mags for short) of berdusk (any pronouns are fine), a chaotic neutral half-orc school of valour bard, and the physical embodiment of the term "here for a good time, not a long time". her story is relatively simple and feel-good in comparison to my other tavs, and i already know i'll end up having the most fun playing him aside from ismene LOL her human dad and orc mom are easily the best parents anyone could ask for, endlessly supportive and loving to whatever their child would choose to do or be as they navigated what he liked and didn't, even though their collective eccentric personalities made them stick out like sore thumbs even in a populated city like berdusk. nonetheless, neither of her parents really cared what people thought so inevitably, he didn't either and in turn became an unapologetically confident and outspoken person. mags learned music from her initially nomadic parents, who traveled all over faerûn sharing their own music, dances and stories, and it became yet another thing they inherited and completely loved. the more he wrote, composed, and sang while playing her father's harp, the stronger mags' music undeniably became, practically wooing anybody that came near it---even those who picked on every surface-level thing about him became unable to deny the magnetism (get it) magdalena of berdusk possessed. they enlisted into a bard academy, attending for years until magdalena found the curriculum to be severely boring, leaving only a year before they would have graduated.

her parents, of course, cheered them on.

so from then on, magdalena felt the rest of faerûn was ready to hear his songs, constantly writing while on the roads, fighting weird shit, performing at nearly every tavern she could find (and shagging only the finest of folk on the way). no matter what though, mags always makes sure to find the time and place to write to her parents no matter where he is and even with a creepy crawly worm in his brain. the situation doesn't necessarily phase them aside from the fact the idea of a worm in her brain skeeves her out a bit, like what if it lays eggs or something? she doesn't exactly understand the full circumstance. other than that, mags is content with chilling with these newfound travel partners of his and seeing where the course takes them, and even if he is to die inevitably she hopes that by the end of it, he'll have a sick ass album to compile before they can. she truly enjoys to savor and experience, so naturally i'm pairing them with shadowheart of all people LOL they'll probably soften each other up. also probably only gives into the tadpole for a while in exchange for the wicked sex dreams until their gf is like "alright you goob can you maybe stop before it kills you faster". mags is an ESFP 8w7 !!

last but not least is zaludra strombjörn (she/her), a lawful neutral wood elf enchantment wizard. omfg shes honestly such a sourpuss LMAO she'll end up likely being my most "evil" route (and by that i mean i have a hard time making mean choices in game lol), but she'll also end up having the most significant development. from a young age, zaludra never had the easiest time connecting with others, and wasn't really allowed to due to her condition. albinism wound up giving her severely overprotective parents who didn't even let her skin go near where sunlight pierced the ground. thus her whole childhood essentially was this reinforced idea that she was deadweight, something that didn't do wonders for her self-esteem as she was unable to directly contribute to anything in her village. in the silence, zaludra only grew a resentment for her home and the situation she was in, only finding more things to dislike about the wooden elf's way of life.

the only time she felt any sort of gratification was in occasional conversations with the only person who would talk to her outside of her parents, her village's sole druid. their magic captivated zaludra, the ability to be anything else, to be something great was---and begged to learn their ways. unfortunately, a severe lack of connection to her people or home made it impossible, and zaludra was back where she started. so, she resorted to other means of obtaining the art of magic; zaludra would venture the nights in the nearest town over in magic shops draped in whatever cloth could cover her skin, checking out basic spell casting books from the local libraries. the more she practiced magic in secret, the more determined she became to be the best in it. overtime it became clear zaludra was a natural genius in the arcanic arts, even learning to craft potions as well, concoctions of her own to make her condition easier to live with rather than hiding in shame because of it. she left her home publicly declaring it beneath her and the potential it had hidden her from and set off to further her education in the city of silverymoon where she only continued to succeed.

she would prove everyone wrong she thought, all of them, including the people who should have supported her the most---her own parents. but highkey though shes super lonely but basically represses that with her undying ambition, but then city and school life makes her highkey more annoyed by other people (likely because she had no clue how to connect with them but dont tell her that). probably will want to learn how to control the tadpole at first for her own power until she starts to unexpectedly not hate her companions, especially karlach because a fine ass tiefling solves everyones emotional problems <3 also i hc that her and astarion get confused as siblings/twins all the time cause of how similar they look she probably hates it. also shes an ISTJ 3w4

anyways thats all IM STILL WAITING ANXIOUSLY FOR THE RELEASE AS WE SPEAK

Omori and its parallels with OCD, or my personal connection to this game

SPOILER WARNING: AS USUAL, MAJOR OMORI SPOILERS FOR MOST ENDINGS AND THINGS.

CONTENT WARNING: MENTIONS OF SELF-HARM, SUICIDE, SEVERE MENTAL ILLNESS, DEATH, LOSS AND OMORI-TYPICAL CONTENT. I will also be referring to my own intrusive thoughts a lot, so please take caution if it might trigger you to spiral.

DISCLAIMER: I AM BY NO MEANS A MENTAL HEALTH PROFESSIONAL. I am in the process of seeking a diagnosis (we're getting there :) ), but it has been otherwise confirmed by professionals that I experience OCD. This post is about my personal experience with OCD and trauma, and the way I believe these feeling manifest in the game. I don't believe Sunny or Basil experience OCD, but I want to compare my experiences with obsession, compulsions and trauma-related OCD. Other people may have completely different experiences, and those are valid!

You could call this catharsis, some form of healing. Really I'm doing this for myself, which was kind of why I started writing Omori analysis in the first place (???). and im a nerd for this game

Guilt

Guilt has always been one of my biggest hurdles, and it's also a very relevant theme in Omori.

For the longest time, my brain and I have been actively trying to develop compulsions to cope with guilt, and it seems to consistently fail. I've tried singing songs on repeat, extreme self-harm, distraction, avoidance ect, and nothing seems to work. Sure, I've never committed recital day, but even small things can make me feel horrifically guilty, as my intrusive thoughts tell me I'm a horrible person or a liar.

I see this in Sunny, too. For the longest time, his mind has been trying to cope with the guilt, and it chose to delve deep into repression. But no matter how much he represses, the truth is still there, and so that guilt is still there.

The Fear Polaroids in the Omori Route are also a representation of guilt, as is the mirror during the Truth segment, both depicting Sunny has a hideous demon. My intrusive thoughts depict me as a demon, too, doing horrific things to myself and others. The images of mutilated, demonic Sunny capture the... inhumanity that my mind makes me feel.

I get it, Sunny. I don't feel human either.

Mewo's Death as an Intrusive Thought

Cat Dissection is an interesting area of Black Space, in that its immediate relevance to the truth is less obvious. It's also one of the more horrifying ones - on my first playthrough, I was running blind, and I figured you'd have to kill Mewo for the key. You do not. my biggest regret

Mewo is obviously linked to Mari, but at the time, we'd only ever seen this slightly mentioned in the real world photo album. At that point in Black Space, Mewo was closely tied to Sunny and Omori, being an essential part of White Space.

The player can stab themselves to get out, or cut open Mewo and suffer the regret. This room feels very reminiscent of a gruesome intrusive thought that just won't go away, those days where you see yourself murdering all your friends, or violently injuring yourself. Much of Sunny's hallucinations, or creatures like Something, also mimic this kind of thing.

That room has far deeper analysis to dive into, but this is as far as I'll go for this segment.

Compulsive Behaviour - Repetition

Basil is probably the first character that comes to mind when I think of compulsive behaviour. His most iconic line...

This sort of repetitive action is the root of a compulsion - an attempt to relieve anxiety. Whether or not Basil fits the criteria of needing repeat those words otherwise something bad might happen is unknown, but this sort of behaviour is very relatable in my experience.

I have a tendency to not be consciously aware, but others notice that I'll mumble things to myself. Typically this is me trying to talk back to my intrusive thoughts, as far as I know, and trying to confirm to myself that they're wrong. This will often end in asking someone else or doing research to confirm.

By repeating these things, Basil is trying to ward off the reality, which is that everything isn't okay at all, and likely won't be. But the specific framing is future-oriented - he isn't saying that things are okay right now, he's saying that they will be. This could link to my later point about uncertainty.

Avoidance

Not many people talk about avoidance behaviours as a compulsion, which is probably why much of my OCD went unnoticed as a child. You don't really consider mental compulsions, and avoidance can be very easily hidden, especially if you the ability to force yourself through something if you have no other options.

While it's not exactly the same, Sunny's repression of rooms in his house and the shaking head that prevents you from going to particular areas are forms of avoidance. The sliding glass door that leads to the backyard and the piano room are the most notable - it's not repressed, it's there, but Sunny shakes his head every time you interact with it. He can't go in there. He just can't. There's no explanation for the player.

I relate to that. I have strange rules that mean I can't do things. I just can't. There's no real explanation for myself, either, and sometimes I don't even get intrusive thoughts of the consequences, just some insistence that I can't do it. Perhaps this was confusing or frustrating for the player, but I found it incredibly realistic.

Uncertainty and Abandonment Issues

I've heard somewhere that OCD is, ultimately, a fear of uncertainty. As a result of this disorder, combined with trauma, I also have abandonment issues the way Basil does.

Even before the recital day, Basil's abandonment issues are prevalent. He clings to the group with the photo album, preserving his memories. He took photos of the things he didn't want to lose. After the recital day, Basil really did lose everything, and he was broken as a result of that.

I imagine this sort of thing was one of his regular worries, everyone abandoning him, Sunny in particular. And I can relate to that - one of my more common intrusive thoughts is others leaving me after they find out I've done something horrible. It makes you want to shut off from relationships, just to be safe - what if everyone leaves?

I think that 'what if' is what made Basil so attached to Sunny in the present day of the game. He wants to save Sunny, he wants to make things back to the way they were before, but at the same time, there's this uncertainty - Sunny is moving? Sunny is leaving? What will happen? What if everything gets worse?

This wasn't the easiest to write, but thank you for reading.

can you talk about why you disliked undertale yellow? never played it or watched a playthrough but i’m very curious!

PREFACING THIS WITH A DISCLAIMER i know it is a passion project and it makes me Feel Bad that my feelings on it r this negative. i do not mean to discredit the years of work anybody put into it and i am So Happy that the general consensus is that people really liked it! i'm glad the team's work paid off. i am also going to be SUPER opinionated. undertale is my biggest interest of all time it has been my special interest for going on Nine Years . i am Wired to have very strong feelings on it . please do NOT take my opinion as a message to Not enjoy it if you do! play it and form an opinion on ur own time

also SPOILERS for the game!

that being said

i will first state the things i Enjoyed

music was phenomenal! it was very fun and atmospheric

artwork was very good! it makes me a little sad that the canon characters we see didn't really get the tlc/polish that all of the original content did, but that's ok!

i like how smarmy flowey was in the no mercy run. it was a little ooc at times but i had a blast (which will sadly become a negative) partly bc of his attitude

i love mo as a character. im going to rescue him from this game i just know it

ok. things that frustrate me from least to most (i will try to keep this brief bc i WILL go on a tangent if left unrestrained)

i wish the main cast had more variety in monster types. body shape, proportions, colors, etc! with how wide the array of the cast is in ut, it's just a little sad that the main cast here all roughly have the same build, height, and aren't really "monstery". lots of the non-main characters (i am including the feisty five in here) have more diverse and visually interesting designs to me and i wish there was just a bit more variety

add-on to the previous point: something abt the fact that dalv just kind of looks like a human Guy who is Purple with Horns makes me irrationally irritated. they could have put a little more of a bat motif in there or Something because the first time i saw him i genuinely didn't think he was supposed to be a monster

some of the fights are NONSENSE BULLSHIT HARD for no reason. some of these have been fixed since release but there were multiple segments that weren't even like. main story character fights that made me want to rip my hair out. additionally the shops are FEW and FAR between. it was a STRUGGLE to get enough healing items 90% of the time and i had to ration them out constantly

i know most were patched out and this is kind of a nitpick but the complete ABUNDANCE of grammatical and spelling errors on release took me out of the flow of things SO much. places that desperately needed a comma that had none, words completely misspelled (outside of punchlines for jokes), things like that. it wouldn't have been such a problem but it happened SO much and really got into the way of making sure dialogue progressed as normal. speaking of

i'm so sorry. half of the dialogue and jokes make me want to shriek and scream in agony. maybe it's just not my cup of tea and nobody is forcing you to have completely toby-fox-accurate jokes in your game but the majority of the jokes made in the pacifist/neutral runs fall completely flat for me. the general dialogue is very fanfic-esque to me in a way ? i do Not know how to describe it. it's not Good. along w that i'm sorry but in my opinion the way they wrote asgore in there is COMPLETELY out of character. i'm going to be so so honest mr king "fuzzy pushover" fluffybuns isn't going to go GET OUT OF MY SIGHT AND NEVER RETURN!!!!! the man got beat up by a child and took her in to train her. like yeah his garden is sentimental or whatever but like. he is such a Nice Guy. he would Not do that

the timeline does not make Any sense. if frisk is the first human to fall in YEARS to the point where everyone is losing hope of ever getting another soul for the barrier and most monsters don't recognize you as a human and let you interact w them freely why in the Fuck are undyne and alphys just like. alive and kicking here. why is alphys doing amalgamate shit already. what is going ON

and finally. the part that makes me the Most Irritated

i cannot fucking stand the story. I AM SORRY

i physically cannot expound on this as much as i want to bc the post is long enough as it is and i'll go on forever but generally speaking

i Do Not Like ceroba. i didn't really feel any connection or anything to any of the other characters in General but her entire deal and everything that surrounds it just makes me So Mad. like ok. i tried to get past the "oh my husband is a super important scientist (but not the royal scientist because that's alphys teehee but still REALLY important) and he's also secretly a boss monster (even though the only boss monsters we see are the Actual Fucking King and Queen of monsters and are the same monster subtype)" shit but like. THEN it's like. oh he's actually making a super secret magic serum that uses essence from a boss monster soul and a human soul (where did he get that. he made this after he was fired from his job. where did he get a human soul from) to give EVERY monster the power of a boss monster so that when we EVENTUALLY get enough souls to get to the surface (could literally be hundreds of years from now) we'll be strong enough to beat the humans (that's why asgore is collecting the souls in the first place. to shatter the barrier and become a god strong enough to beat the humans. that's the Point)

but WUH OH!!!! the serum is actually KILLING him!!!! and he never told his wife! so he leaves a series of tapes behind to tell her abt it after he dies and IN THESE TAPES he's like listen. here's this awesome potion im making. you need a BOSS MONSTER SOUL and a HUMAN SOUL to make it work. our daughter IS a boss monster. BUT. do NOT FUCKING use it on her. ok. DON'T. do that. ok love you (dies) AND FUCKING. her like 6 year old daughter walks in and speaks in a perfect eloquent sentence and says some shit like "we have to carry on daddy's legacy :(" and asks to be injected w the shit that we saw kill her dad SECONDS PRIOR and ceroba is virtually IMMEDIATELY like well ok if the kindergartner says it's fine. AND OF COURSE HER DAUGHTER IMMEDIATELY FALLS DOWN????

and when i tell u the like. WHOLE second half of the game is dedicated to this bullshit nonsense. ceroba has this whole thing where she's trying to kill you because you're pure of heart or whatever and it'll work for the serum or something and after a LONG ASS (stupid incredibly hard for no reason considering SHE IS NOT a boss monster) battle w her she's like ok i'm not gonna do that anymore i give up kill me etc. and in pacifist you're like nah i won't kill u i forgive you Hooray!

and so. right. youve been fighting the ENTIRE TIME. to find the missing kids. to get home. to leave the underground after figuring out what happened. there are only FIVE human souls at this point. having one more will NOT break the barrier. you've been fighting to LIVE this Entire Time. the story must end in clover's death SOMEHOW but literally the driving force here has been survival

clover is literally like ummmm ok well im gonna give up my soul right here right now to add it to the pile. *dies on rooftop ALONE* . the shriek i screamed when this happened was. Astronomical. like. oh yeah everybody let the 9 year old give their life for a civilization that has been trying to kill them this Entire Time. never mind the fact it makes all of the fighting and striving and grueling we did Worthless because clover decides to sacrifice themselves completely out of the player's control. this wouldn't make me AS mad if we had like. a choice like the forgive him/do not asriel thing where we could face asgore and be forced to lose OR sacrifice ourselves but even then it's just. SO silly to me.

i think i get the like. doomed parents sad child dreemurr parallels they were TRYING to go for but it is all so clunky and wonky and. just DOES not work narratively if you think about ANY aspect of it for too long

all of these factors combined made the game a complete and total Slog to get through . it is Not just me i streamed it to a few friends the whole time and the opinion was the Same

HOWEVER.

the no mercy run, completely against what it is MADE to do, was fucking awesome

the passive aggressive comments from flowey the entire time were hilarious. the power trip i got chasing axis was splendid. i didn't have to sit through pages of dialogue that made my eye twitch. i just got to Kill People.

i do Not like the fact that they seemed to think no mercy = Hard Bosses which. isn't really true for undertale ? out of the normal bosses only two are ramped up in difficulty and it thematically makes sense Why. in uty martlet gets multiple fights (including a Bullshit Insane Hard Final Fight), ceroba gets a Bullshit Insane Hard fight w a new mechanic that is introduced out of Nowhere and took me like 6 times to notice that it was even Implemented, and axis gets a tough fight. which is Fine but i do not think it really understood the message of like. the no mercy run is not supposed to be Fun. you are eviscerating this world and everything it has to offer. you're literally Killing the game. it's a tricky thing to balance but all in all No part of it made me feel bad. this could be due to me Already not really caring abt any of the characters but. sigh

also martlet gets really strong at the end bc she injects herself w dt but like. why does she know about that. she does guard stuff Near the Lab but why does she Know about the experiments. the whole point is that nobody Else Knows. where did she get that from. what the fuck

anyway. says that i won't go on for too long. proceeds to go on for too long like some kind of Liar

3, 4, 5 aaaaand 6! :3

3. I do love me a tortured artist...

Reese definitely takes the cake for. Many reasons. One is that i personally have to short-circuit seeing him. Another is that I love people who talk during movies so so much please explain to me the directors entire thing. Also, it's very true that his shit is reminiscent of Goya's black period (thinking about it even in genesis sorta) and Beksiński's work (🇵🇱🇵🇱🇵🇱🇵🇱🇵🇱💥💥❗‼️💥 Poland mention) and i m a big fan of Beksiński. Im also not immune to 12 foot, monster-dwelling tailed monster (shout-out to needle princess) Also just found out he's a DM? I'm genuinely ready to sell my soul for the guy

But Avery and Stella are so close behind, Avery for being the weirdest person around (so so affectionate. Why did you say you'd like the ditchlings to lay eggs under your skin), Stella because I'm personally also a big fan of cryptids and paranormal in general. Also there's so much wrong with her

4. This one unfortunately has got to go to Oscar because I haven't really gotten around to hanging out with him yet... Not that I dislike him by any means, just don't have a lot of feelings about him either way.

Unless Sybil counts, she's interesting as fuck but I do not trust her a single bit and there's so many things I'm sure are her fault. So as a character — I think she's great . But I'm hissing and scratching at her

5.

Only now I realised there's two question fives and i did the other one in another ask so!

My absolute favourite side character is the pastor. He's just some guy . I would trust him with my life. Wdym he just went "uhhh yeah god and stuff" to make sure Kaneeka /and Avery think that's what we're talking about. "Firm parenting moment" and it's please be good or we might skip storytime. I cannot wait to see more of him

6.

My favourite traits have got to be street smart and keen eye, though book smart and powerful build arent far behind. I just love lying to people and eavesdropping . But the muscle-weirdo stuff powerful build does and additional information book smart grants are really cool also

As for combos, I think it's the same, keen eye and street smart are amazing together . Though maybe it's just because the MC who has them is my favourite. I'm going for a playthrough that gets both of these and book smart, and so far it's also been very fun so book smart/keen eye seems fun, and so does street smart/powerful build with all the bullshit it allows me to pull

Hii! I really want to start writing a fanfic about wesker/reader in the dbd world but I haven't played (just watched gameplays) of the RE games... Like, I know his character (but forgot about a lot of the main stuff of the games) and he is just so... alluring. He makes me want to write again.

Do you have any advice for writing something about him so as not to end up mischaracterizing him? Is there anything in particular that you, as a fan that knows about his lore and knows him, would like to read?

Answer if you want! thanks 🌟

hello! im actually so honored you came to me of all people 😭 thank you

it’s always good to know and remember the main aspects of that character, such as what they stand for, what their motives are, and how that affects them as a person. this doesn’t have to be applied in every fic you make, but knowing thre core aspects of a character is important for writing them as a whole

and get their personality down! it’s good to see how they act, their mannerisms, how they talk, how they dress, how they speak to people. these are all very important in writing as character as well.

i think in wesker’s case it’s good to remember these things:

- wesker is very egotistical. he thinks he is superior to everyone around him and believes himself to be a god compared to everybody else. it’s very important not to make this all that he is though. considering this is in the dbd-verse, i would implement it more subtly. even making him smirk as he chases a survivor can give off that confident attitude he has.

- wesker is a calm and collected man, though he at times can reveal his hatred for others around him. one thing about wesker a lot of people tend to exaggerate is his anger, mainly because of how he acts in re5. i do not think this is all wesker should be reduced to. he has been shown countless times to show how calm he can be in situations, even pushing down that anger/irritation at times. wesker is very capable of being an angry little bitch, but it shouldn’t be the core aspect of his character and be so exaggerated like some people make it out to be. if you ever want to write how he feels in a first/third person perspective then watching umbrella chronicles playthroughs is perfect as it is right in the perspective of wesker! this could help you more perceive what he thinks when in action

-don’t be afraid to observe how he acts in game as well! even if you don’t own any of the games or dbd, there’s plenty of videos of cutscenes with wesker in it. learning his mannerisms and how he speaks just through seeing what he does is also a good way to get to know the character more. he is far more than just being smart and an asshole.

-this is more of a small one but wesker does not have a british accent! it is trans-atlantic! if you don’t know what that accent sounds like, think of pretty much any disney movie made in the 1950’s-1970’s. a lot of them feature a very sing songy accent. the reason people misinterpret this is because it is supposed to sound halfway american and british. (if you need more examples feel free to watch drew gooden’s ‘insane how-to videos from the 50s’)

either way in the end you can write wesker however you want. it’s your way of interpreting the character and it’s in your right to do whatever you’d like. there’s tons of shit i’m tired of seeing writers do with wesker but as i said it is what makes you happy with writing that character. i’m terrible with giving any sort of advice but i do just ask that you have fun with it and don’t worry about what others might think. if it makes you happy, go for it

Decided to start a sort of a challenge run of Unicorn Overlord, cause I really like the game, but I both sort of found the game too easy on my first playthrough, and I was kinda disappointed that the game just vomits story units to you through the whole thing, so after the early game there's little reason to use hireable randos. Which is a real shame, cause making randos in rpgs rules.

So yeah, this run is on True Zenoira mode, so that's permadeath to all troopers in an unit that falls entirely in battle. And im playing with the following additional restrictions:

Only every using hireable mercs. Any story units must be left at the nearest garrison as soon as possible, or otherwise kept away from combat. Technically this run only starts after the first side mission, the one where you get Rolf, cause only then do you get up to D rank and can actually hire anyone at forts.

No grinding missions. I can do the phantom fight stages, but only once. Makes it so I can't ensure an endless amount of resources.

No going back in saves and if I game over then the run is over. Makes it so I actually gotta value every single soldier I have, and if I lose them it's a big hit to the army as a whole. And this makes corne ashes a massively important resource, since they can actually stop me from game overing if my fort gets captured or I run out of time on a mission.

Story wise, this is the anti royalism run. Prince Alain may be the figurehead, but the snot nosed punk wouldn't in a million years actually step on a battlefield to free Fevrith. This is about the common working men of the liberation army getting it done! Let's meet the crew.

Germain. A veteran town militiaman. Thought himself too old to fight back against the empire, but after seeing too much of their opression for too long, he had to take a stand. A lot of the common soldiers in the liberation army rally behind him, much to his irriation.

Florine. A young gal who's lived a good half of her whole life under Zenoiran opression, which has only stoked her want to free her home from it. Very peppy and cheerful, which keeps the moral up when she's around. Kinda thinks of Germain as an uncle of sorts, though no actual relation.

Guy. A tough and stern man who used to work as a bodyguard for a local lord. Looking for revenge for the said lord, after he was murdered by Zenoiran's for opposing their rule. Rumored to have been lovers with the lord in question.

Odo. A woodsman who has lived all his life in farthest ass end of a forest. He had no idea that someone had taken over the world, until just recently when he came over to town for some milk for the first time in ten years.

Nils. Definitely not a Zenoiran spy. No sir.

Armand. A professional soldier who had accepted the new zenoiran rule initially, but his family was torn apart by the new taxes and unjust laws and such, so he picked the side of the liberation.

Sébastien. An extremely cowardly and sulky young knight. He kept getting unwanted advances by a Zenoira aligned noblewoman, and when he kept refusing she had him branded as a criminal. To not have to be on the run for the rest of his life, he now reluctantly fights for the liberation.

First actual mission with our army here was the one against Bruno. Went fairly smoothly, although Germaine, Florine and Guys unit got caught offguard at one point, so I had to use a revival orb. Provoke is good at getting archers out of watchtowers, but do it too far and they'll just run right back as it turns out. The importance of archer support became pretty evident right away. No casualties.

Afterwards hired two more soldiers for a dedicated anti cavalry unit.

Artemisia. A warrior of justice. She won't say anything more about herself.

Maxim. Comes from a long line of spear guard guys, the types that stand around doorways and cross their spears when someone tries to enter without permission. Zenoira does not use the treasured method of sentry-dom, which is why he and his whole family is rising to action against the empire.

Ended it here for now. Very fun so far, glad to be thinking much more about resource management, though im sure it will start to grind my gears the bigger the army and fights get.

I'll keep up updates about this... if this gets any engagement, I guess.

hbo tlou spoilers (and the game too) just rambling to myself bc i gotta get these thoughts out of my head

feeling.. conflicted about that episode still. wasnt gonna say anything but im a little bit nervous about how joel and ellie are being handled at this point just like overall

ellie to a lesser extent i just feel like shes a little.. one note almost (they gave her the joke book and she had some nice moments with sam at least). theyre just playing so hard into the spitfire side of her but game ellie was way sweeter and kinder than i think people remember? when i started my re-playthrough even i forgot how like.. chill she was honestly. a lot of her anger was reactionary/in defense and not always just immediately antagonistic. hbo ellie needs more softness to her its starting to annoy me a bit how just outright hostile she is to literally everyone

but in joels case.. the changes they made this episode honestly i feel were detrimental to his character development. they make it seem like joel asking tommy to take ellie is more about the fact that hes aging and hes afraid hes going to get ellie killed, so he needs tommy to take her because he has a greater chance of making it back. and they side step a bit the selfishness of joels request. when in the game it was SOLEY about joels selfishness and how he could tell he was starting to feel protective of/close to ellie and wanted to stop that shit immediately by passing her off to tommy so he could just wash his hands of the whole thing (which would also put tommy at risk and maria chews him out for it (which i wouldve liked to have seen in the show but alas...)). and the argument he and ellie get into (after she runs away!!) is supposed to be the culmination of those feelings and how hes pushing her away and hes afraid of being a dad again (im NOT your dad. and we are going our separate ways). but ultimately chooses to stay with ellie and that choice is SO IMPORTANT!! and now in the show its like... ok so... now youre Not afraid of.. getting her killed? because you STILL have a bad ear and ptsd? (that he wouldve had for a while anyway so honestly its a little funny theyre playing it up so hard all of a sudden him clutching at his chest all the time is just kinda funny to me again where is the subtlety i dont see it). and like with this change it makes their argument (and their reconciliation) less powerful honestly to me at least. that argument they have is seared into my brain its still one of my favorite scenes but i just wasnt feeling it as much with this different set up of events (and also imo the game still has the better actor performances PLEASE watch those scenes if you havent)

and this side stepping of joels selfishness as a character is honestly a problem for me. and im afraid what it might mean for future episodes. because joels selfishness is very integral to his character. knowing what i do about whats coming down the line, and how theyve been talking about the “cure” so far, im so 😬 just clenching my teeth so hard. because they just... keep saying every once in a while that “there can never be a cure making a cure would be hard how would you even manufacture and distribute it?” (squinting REAL HARD AT THAT LAST ONE!!) and im soooo nervous that they might downplay just how much of a selfish asshole joel is and how they might try to make his future actions less terrible.... or justify them in some way..... or something equivalent to downplaying what happens..... 

i mentioned it a while ago but these are arguments the fans have been having since summer 2013 but what annoys me about it is that none of it even matters!!! because the Only thing that matters is joels selfish choice. not whether hes right or wrong. the ambiguity is the whole point!! the selfishness is the whole point!! joel doesnt care and hes gonna do whatever he thinks is necessary regardless of the repercussions. and i am just so afraid theyre gonna undercut that. I HOPE THEY DONT IM CROSSING MY FINGERS SO HARD THAT THEY DONT WE CAN CELEBRATE IF THEY DONT but sometimes people are afraid to let their characters be shitty and have flaws and act selfishly and joel is a bit of a controversial character already. i hope they dont try to make him/his actions more “acceptable” somehow. i LIKE that hes like this it makes him INTERESTING

but yeah the rest of the episode was fine i guess. loved seeing jackson. oh but i will say that the end of the episode felt so uneventful to me which is hilarious based off of what happens, but the way things play out in the game is SO TENSE and drawn out that in comparison was just really weak in the show unfortunately. im sure it was a “for time” reason and like it still gets the idea across but again just more reason for me to stand by the game still being The True Last of Us Experience. looking forward to the left behind episode tho i am so excited to see my girl riley again 💔

im curious. who are your fav characters from each mainline persona game that you have played 🤔🤔 (take this as an invitation to ramble about them)

YIPEEEEEEEE here we go will be long so im hiding it under a readmore again. also since you said mainline im not including toshiro or eri but you Know...... im abnorma, abt them

i have NOT played p1 and i've just barely started p2is (though ive watched snippets of someone elses's playthrough) but i will say. based on my limited knowledge i rly like hidehiko, ayase, naoya, tatsuya, jun, eikichi, yukino, maya, and lisa

p3 and p4 are difficult bc theyre the ones im the most autistic abt and the main entire casts as a whole are comforts for me. but anyways. going to talk about p3 first Yes I Will Include SLs too. im abnormal. top 3 main insaners for p3 though are akihiko, yukari, and junpei. for me

makoto/minato sooo so gender envy. im obsessed with his design a lot. his character i do also like hes a little goofy and so mecore but mainly his design is something i love a lot

same with kotone. also love how she has a sort of distinct personality that you can tell with slight dialogue changes that her counterpart doesnt say. shes rly real. love reload but i miss her...

as stated yukari's one of my favs. she didnt Use to be (i did like her but Not as much) but she's slowly become one and man. i love that silly girl. her haters will not survive the winter actually. it does piss me off though because like. yeah shes not perfect no character rly is but she's a traumatized mentally ill teenage girl with a dead dad and a neglectful mom cut her some slack maybe? god forbid women do anything. idk. but im obsessed with her. her character is actually so interesting to me and not a lot of people talk about it? like her whole fear of death causing issues with summoning her persona like at the beginnning, her dad being involved with the kirijo groups shit, how she puts on a cheerful front but is actually deeply really lonely :(, her kinda playful insult friendship with junpei (deep down they do care abt eachother. i wish that was explored more. i found a rly good fic abt it once.) and etc etc. idrk what to say but shes sooo. i also love how she initially HATES mitsuru and is super jealous of her and then. Well. gay tension is real. anyways shes a transfem lesbian to me btw. yukamitsu ftw

junpei's also become one of my favs. somehow. in a similar vein to yukari in that he wasn't initially my main fav character but i think his character's also pretty interesting and has. a lot of unexplored potential. he's very silly and i love him for that a lot but something i don't see many people talk about is like. his Issues. like yeah hes silly but he's also got some fucked up self-worth issues!!! remember the scene on 5/9 where he kinda gets really upset and goes off on his own and stuff. for example. like i think him being imperfect and having these moments where he's NOT cheerful and goofy all the time and actually deeply really jealous of you because he feels that fighting's all he's good for and he's not worth much else is what makes him interesting. do you get it. like him being tbe silly funny guy isn't all he is as a person yk!!!!! also as far as characterization I point a lot to the scene where yukari's more than willing to go confront the people in the alley while junpei's worried, or scene near the end of the game where yukari teases junpei and he snaps at her, confessing that while he doesn't show it he really is terrified. they all are, at that point. yk what I mean? also people don't acknowledge his trauma with his father enough (maybe because it's only really discussed at all in femc's route... his SL is so good but not enough ppl see it... BUR YEAH did not think I'd go off on a tangent about junpei fucking iori tonight but he's real. hashtag brokeback tartarus. also he's an adhder to me. (oh yeah also want to point out this line in his SL where he says "maybe I have anxiety or something". yeah. that's a line!)

akihiko fucking sanada. ohhhh man. this guy. where do i even START. he's so so crazy like what if your local high school upperclassman boxing champion guy was also really gay for his dying childhood friend and autistic as hell and also traumatized. and he's doing boxing in the first place to overcompensate because the death of his sister made him fear losing anyone else again snd he needs to feel like he has power. he needs control. yk? like this guy made me insane for like several months straight in 2023 and he still makes me ill. to this day. as you can probably tell by my distaste for people seeing yukari and junpei at face value you can probably gather that I hate the protein jokes and i Do. he said it like. Once in p3. it never rly was funny????? and what they did in spinoffs esp p4a to just make him look like a gym rat and nothing more makes me upset bc of the REASON he's obsessed with fighting. he's not just a dumb jock (he also isn't dumb lol he canonically scores very high on his exams) he's overworking himself because feelings of self doubt from trauma have caused him to feel the need to overcompensate so he never loses anyone again. you know? it would've been interesting to see him relapse in p4a if theyd actually done it well. like he doesnt rly give himself time or room to grieve in game (theres rhat onw scene on 10/5 and then he barely talks about it again. man i wish it was developed more...) so realizing that grieving isnt a linear process that he can just repress for a long time and even years after it can still hurt would go INSANE. but no they just turned him into i love protein joke number 20. okay!!! (im very angry) thinking about when my non persona friend after hearing me explain some of the plot described p3 as like a greek tragedy because like. damn. he and shinji were doomed from the start with personas like polydeuces and castor huh. anyways. yeah. continuing writing now that i've watched october 4th in reload AND akihiko's breakdown as a reuslt and i wanna scream and cry and throw up that will be for another post but ooh man it mad eme cry like 3 times. and I KNOEW WHAT HAPPENS. THEYRE SOOOOOOOOOO if you know me im an insane akishinji truther. im just. i wanna talk abt other charactrs so ill stop here but always ask me about akihiko + akishinji + ships i like in general. i am really normal. oh btw transmasc akihiko is forever real to me. also he's autistic and a ptsder. to me (tbf what persona character Doesnt have some form of truama but like. this guy in particular). up there with my highest blorbos

i dooont wanna go on for too long abt every other character in p3 so ill keep this next part short and sweet but if u wanna hear me talk more abt any of them. feel free to. starting with fuuka i love he rmy transfem autistic girlie who has every disease. i also love mitsuru a lot who i Wish had people acknowledge her deeper aspects more. like. she was experimented on and also very sheltered and also a little bit of a girlfail. shes not fully the girlboss you all say she is shes also just a teenage girl!!!!!!!!!! koromaru can do no wrong hes forever the best. i love that dog. ken makes me so so sad he is just a kid!!! what the hell!!!!!! :(. and oh man. shinji. guy who is so wracked with guilt. guy that is dying no matter what happens. guy that dies in his lover's arms

as far as non-sees characters. i rly like strega. esp jin and chidori. dont think abt them enough. also as far as SLs i like keisuke, hidetoshi, bunkichi and mitsuko, kazushi, yuko, and etc etc...i need to see rio and saoris links too they look real. oh also i LOVE ryoji

p4 time !!!!!!

again gonna cut this short so i can actually Fit it all in one post. but wow. i do like all of the IT so so much but im just focusing on my favs. anyways i love yu so much his autistic swagger esp in the animation is amazing. like he is not a "chad" he's just an autistic teenager. ok. also the animation broke me when nanako gets kidnapped he sounds fucking distraught there. love when people delve into yu's issues also bc hes a bit fucked up but Man. ouch. just like me fr tho

i love yosuke in a similar way to why I like junpei because he's kind of a loser /pos snd has some insane issues that his shadow delves into that are Kind of Insane for the FIRST shadow of the game. like ok damn. i really do love his social link in general tho his was the first one I maxed out in my (unfinished because i didn't want to finish it) p4g playthrough so!!!!! many things wrong with him and also the lgbt community has forgiven yosuke hanamura. also similarly to junpei he's adhd as hell. souyo ftw

naotos probably my fav p4 character I think which is Pretty Painful Sometimes. sometimes I need to kill both other persona fans and atlus if ykwim. but anyways i hc him as transmasc for one thing but also if atlus weren't cowards and actually made his story abt rhat it would've hit so hard. his shadow in general is often overlooked apart from that bc what about the part where he talks about being mistreated by others and feeling utterly alone and not allowing himself to act like a kid!!!! it fucks me up!!! he's also super autism btw like god damn. but YEAH point is I love naoto so much and i hate how both some fans and atlus tjemself treat him because his whole arc and shadow had the potential to be super compelling

apart from who i listed above i do like the rest of the IT so much they're such silly friends (i love you chie i love you yukiko i love you kanji i love you rise i love you teddie.). can't think of any SLs off the top of my head that were crazy but I do like daisuke and kou. OH ALSOO the dojimas..... 😢💧😢😢💧 love them

p5 time :3 I'm into it less so than p3 or p4 but Still

yusuke's my favorite p5 character probably. i domt know what it is apart from the common trend of my favs being autistic as hell (see: akihiko and naoto) but he's like. such a fucked up guy. he's traumatized. he loves art. something is deeply wrong with him. obsessed with this gug

i also do like ren/akira, ryuji, futaba, and also mishima (unfortunately. but in my defense there is something deeply wrong with him slash positive). i don't know a lot abt all of p5's confidants but i like iwai I think.... this reminded me I need to make more progress in p5 what the hell. i miss you futaba (i haven't even got to her palace yet im still on kaneshiros LOL)

but YEAH! thank you for asking!!! from the ones I've played my top favs are akihiko + naoto + yusuke respectively so👍👍👍 loved answering this :3 if u have any thoughts on a particular character feel free to ask and ill elaborate :3

ok i need to know more about ellaria STAT. and your thoughts on rosy + the rosymance !!

RRRRR OK OK but ive only played the public demo so far i havent paid for the patreon/closed demo yet, so i have very little information about the Rosymance in general. info dump and stats below

Ellaria is the humorous / cheerful kinda Button, about 5'5", and she calls her brother Nick-Nack in the game but I imagine she will call him any random number of names off the top of her head (based off of when I played Fallout 4 and I would often call Nick any random nickname like Nicki Minaj, Nickle Pickle, Nickolodeon, Nickaroni and Cheese, etc lol). She has some insecurities because she compares herself to her brother a lot, but she tries to tough it out and beat up her bad thoughts bc she's an unstoppable optimist!!! Stubborn to a fault she refuses to back down once she sets her mind to something. Is a very nice person but gets very socially awkward in large groups, and sometimes lashes out when she gets frustrated by how fragile people treat her (the first thing that made her like Instructor Kim was that he didnt beat around the bush abt her zero but didnt treat her like a kid either!! shes like damn finally some respect around here)

Loves Nick so much (i got like a 160% relationship with him in the open demo lol) looks up to him like her personal hero + mentor. Loves her dad even though it's a little bit strained, has not seen or spoken to her mother in 4 or 5 years after The Incident(tm). but she misses her mom a lot she, she's half scared of her mom hurting her and half scared she will hurt her mom.

I chose the pre-prepared name Ella when I first started playing bc I didn't know what the game was about so I wasn't prepared to like.. make an OC for it until I decided I liked it enough lol. But I compromised by just naming her Ellaria and Ella is her nickname. Here are her stats by whatever chapter is the last one in the open demo (8 i think?)

I LOVE AMBROSE KIM... i played as bisexual in my first go as Ella so i had no idea the genders for some charas changed until I checked the Ambrose Kim tag on tumblr lol. but im way more into rosy as a man than as a woman... Mr Kim u can instruct me any day,..

Like I said tho I don't know a lot about the Rosy romance because I only played the open demo, and I know the author says his romance takes the longest to flower because of the whole teacher/student aspect so he's actively trying to NOT fall for button.. well too bad bitch I'm gonna be so respectable and hot he's gonna have no choice.

anyway im gonna get the patreon this week (friday probably) so i can update u on how i feel soon jhgjhlks i also love all of the characters ngl. i would romance all of them in separate playthroughs.

and u didnt ask but ill mention Kali also, my 2nd Wiseman. shes NUTS. i made her to be the exact opposite of my first humorous, cheerful, ready-to-take-on-the-world girl Ella - so Kali is grim and not nice at all and technically still ready to take on the world but more in a "the whole world is my enemy" kind of way instead of the "i wont let anything stop me" ella way. She's VERY resentful about her zero and is one bad look from a ment away from strangling someone

sorry for the long ramble jhagdwj youre the first person who is talking to me about this game that has become my newest obsession (and u were the one who got me into it so UR responsible for this mess) and im happy to share it w someone :3c

pls feel free to tag me in any mind blind stuff u post, whether fanart or oc art or just rambles n stuff i dont care ill love it all. thank u

"live" blogging s7, vol 1 (some analysis, some jokes lol)

first off, I totally forgot there were other casa amor girls so opening the app to see them on the banner I was like oooo

the S7 MC isn't too bad art wise, like it's definitely better than I thought with the preview, but

I do think the skinnier size MC is super skinny and the bigger one is not that much bigger, which is a little disappointing (always appreciate more size inclusion). ideally I think there would be one more size up i think but I do understand that means they'd have to fix all the clothes 3 times.

speaking of clothes they've always been bad at the beginning of the season since like s4 and this is no exception. I wish we got more options in the beginning and then the others they tack on later

the skin tones really are only three shades with each having one warmer variation, which is kind of nice to have people get that option in tone, but I do still wish there were more shades variation in between (and darker ones in general)

for absolutely no reason I have decided that my MC is also gonna be the S5 MC from my first playthrough getting a second chance after a second failed relationship with Suresh (let's just pretend she didn't win her season lol) and she's cute in this style (but again i wish we had the right skin tone for her). I guess if fusebox is backing out of bringing back Eddie then I'm bringing my MC

Her name is Junie and she's doing a lot better now mentally and has gained a little bit of healthy weight and finally loves herself now so fusebox better not make an embarrassment out of her again.

this actually works out pretty well bc usually the casa amor girls on the show arrive at the same time unless something is special about one of them who can show up separately like MC does here (ok fine I've only seen that happen in LI USA S5 and I guess s6 of the game)

Ep 1

Bonnie being an LI feels solely like penance for me thinking Iona was hot but sad she wasn't even a friend really let alone an LI in s3 so thank you but for narrative purposes I'm making Junie straight

Uma is gorgeous

also fusebox is not beating the reused assets allegations even those poses are just too eerily familiar

"I wanna try the slow burn" *has war flashbacks to the Ozzy route I never finished*

short king raf

ok Alex picking MC when Summer was flirting so hard is actually very funny to me

I understand bc it's a gem choice i didn't pick that we didn't get the last card but very funny that they were like we're just not gonna give Summer a chance at all actually

Let's goooo confirmed Joyo is Indonesian (I'm filipino so i was hoping filipino so I could draw him singing karaoke but I am here for any southeast Asian representation at all 🥳)

however I am upset with the use of "rizz" again. maybe once or twice but if they do it again I'm rioting

Alex nerding out is so cute. also who wouldn't want a bob the builder boyfriend for home improvement projects lol

am i too old to understand what normcore is?? like I barely understand e-girl aesthetic but there's more??

Bryson and his sister Jess have the most realistic sibling relationship from the last two seasons bc I also would mess with my brother's partners. and I once again am mourning the idea of a protective brother slow burn storyline in s6 instead of whatever Amelia was doing

"I won't bore you with the details" no pls do it I wanna know and I don't wanna pay the gems

all the guys have great personalities so far and idk if it's because I'm paying attention more this time or it's just better but oh no I'm falling for all of them

the drama set up with the guys and their partners is promising writing (namely the triangle with Geri, Bryson, and Joyo but maybe just because im torn between those two anyway) I'm shocked but cautious it's episode 1 lol

ep 2

early doors?

the gem party outfit is so 2013 disney channel, I actually will be taking the free outfit

wait why is it not night time for truth or dare why did they change clothes lol

joyo, get out of here with the graphic tee and blazer combo. Maybe this is why Bryson doesn't like you, and it'd be justified (tbf him being a bad dresser has been established already though)

oh God I didn't see his pants too jfc let him borrow some clothes

I'm into the frenemy relationship with Summer, like there's always a female villain in the game and they're almost always entertaining to me at the beginning (minus maybe Kat and Ivy)

I'm warming up to the all the guys like how can you pick

I'm starting to realize I personally have a problem because I always go, at least initially, for the chefs/foodies (Jake, Bobby, Camilo, Roberto) and I like Bryson rn and I think my MC would go for Bryson based on how I played her in s5 but I'm slowly inching over to Joyo and honestly i see the vision for Bobby clone I mean Raf and it is absolutely bc they've mentioned cooking

stop talking about feet pls not again

I expect this from Summer but Uma coming over to try to steal my man?? I appreciate her boldness though and at least she's not going behind anyone's back

ep 3

as someone who doesn't have the modded app and will not pay real money for gems, I feel very happy with choosing to eavesdrop on the guys' conversation. I feel like usually a lot of the gem scenes aren't worth it but this one is fun

Joyo does skincare but can't dress and Bryson is a fashion expert but makes fun of skincare. If they joined forces they'd be unstoppable, thank God they hate each other

hey what the fuck happened to cassius

so in summary im pleasantly surprised and hyped for this season at the moment. and lastly, pls don't drop the ball on stick or twist again please please pleaseeee

Tbf as much as I don’t trust TV writers, I have no doubt Maria will be fine. Part of Tommy’s storyline is that he actively chooses to leave her when he goes on his revenge quest and when he returns a broken man, the one thing he has left is his marriage, and he ruins that too and without that, and that pain will only be doubled with a 4 year old kid as well.

It also makes the contrast to Ellie leaving Dina and JJ more poignant, and maybe even backs up Tommy’s decision to go to the farm more as in ‘I left my wife and kid for you, you can leave yours for me’.

So even though it would set Tommy down a darker path, I actually think it’s pivotal Maria is alive for the revenge quest because of that choice to leave, which is easier if she’s not there and I think a lot of Part 2 is about choices and if the costs are worth it and if his family are dead, Tommy doesn’t really have any ‘costs’ left but if they are, his choices can actively haunt him since they’re alive but he’s still lost them

these are very awesome and legit points!!!! i think its been a while since i last watched a tlou2 playthrough as well so thank you for the reminder of how his game/season 2 story kinda reflects ellie’s in those ways

i think part of the reason im just major major offput about them adding a pregnancy for maria in s2 in it just makes things so much more sad and stressful for maria????? like her whole life has just been loving people and then getting left behind. imagine finding a husband you love and having a child with him and then losing them BOTH to a goddamn zombie apocalypse. id already be devastated. joel lost his child and it completely ruined him; maria lost a child and their father, who as far as we know she had a happy life with. fucking brutal

but THEN she picks herself up, dusts herself off, and finds the strength to keep going. builds a place that she would’ve been maybe happy with raising kevin in, if she could, and she opens her heart up to tommy. she falls in love, and theyre happy, and now shes pregnant. shes having another baby that she gets to raise and lose with a husband she adores

THEN HIS BROTHER GETS MURDERED AND NOW HES JUST GONNA LEAVE HER THERE????? WITH A WHOLE ASS TINY CHILD??????? for REVENGE??????

like im sorry, i love me some good ol revenge as much as the next guy—i really do. the glory was my favorite show, and the first time i watched a tlou 2 full play through i was rooting for tommy and ellie to honestly take out EVERYBODY in joel’s name—and i also know firsthand what kind of distorted thinking tommy’s level of grief can cause. but i just HATE the idea that tommy would leave a CHILD to go after anyone, even the people that killed his brother. and i think if joel saw him do so, he literally would smack him upside the head and drag him back to jackson

it also just doesnt fit what i imagine tommy would do in the instance that he has a kid???? like this is the same tommy that watched joel devote his whole entire life to his own daughter from jump, who wouldve done anything he could to protect his first daughter and DID do everything he could to protect his second. tommy knows from joel that when you’re a father, you’re kid comes fucking first. fuck everything else

so i just can’t imagine tommy leaving both maria AND his child???? like tbh i could understand him leaving maria in the game, as much as i didn’t like it—but his own baby???? he knows joel wouldnt ever want him to do that, no matter what happens to him. to me it just wouldn’t make sense for tommy’s grief over joel to take him so far that he makes a choice he knows joel would hate

(and i know ellie made the choice to leave jesse and dina, but i think a big reason she did that was bc she had the additional guilt of having jesse on her conscience and knowing that tommy wouldn’t physically be able to do it after being shot. tommy’s circumstances for leaving his kid would be different)

so like for those reasons on tommy’s side, it doesn’t make much sense to me that he would go after joel unless his own child was out of the picture, and i don’t see his child being out of the picture unless maria i also out of the picture

NOT SAYING ID RATHER MARIA BE DEAD THAN PREGNANT BTW I WANT HER TO BE ALIVE AND HAPPY AND SAFE. i am just so confused about the hbo writer’s intentions with making her pregnant like!!!!!! feels very sus to me!!!!!!

especially bc of the track record for the way nonwhite tlou characters are brutalized in the game/show too. like @clickergossip ur tags on the reblog were so so so so so so so SO right on point. them making maria a PREGNANT black woman just makes me so nervous that something terrible will happen, esp considering what we’ve seen happen to the other Black characters in the game/show

and i totally understand brutality and gore and death is all part of tlou anyway, but i feel like with joel and ellie, the violence is almost always balanced out witth a degree of love/humor/lightheartedness. unfortunately rutina wesley’s maria hasn’t had much opportunity at all to partake in those lighter moments, which makes me think either the writers have a LOT of good stuff coming up for her or that they think she’s expendable. idk idk idk idk this does even have a point, im just rambling and thinking about it a lot aand very on edge as a maria-truther 😭😭😭 as much as i want to have confidence, i have many many doubts she will be fine

The only problem with timezones is I want to talk to the cool people but I get so tired and start talking absolute nonsense (like I'm doing rn) but anyways who's your favourite oxenfree character?

i am a connoisseur of talking nonsense so dont you worry. and oooo this is the most enigmatic question of all time for me. it shifts from moment to moment. i have tried many times to declare a favorite and it never really feels right because i love and think about them all about the same. i usually say clarissa is my favorite because she is the one i connected with first. i loved her from the moment i met her on my very first playthrough, and she has continued to be something i return to in low moments because she is symbolic of something very valuable to me when it comes to dealing with anger. but as i said in The Oxenfree Playthrough Video™, jonas is realistically more my favorite because gets the most reaction out of me. he's a blorbo, a scrunkly, whatever. evokes a lot of those feral stick figure memes with the blood. he is just suuuuch a little guy to me and so funny and so sweet and just like me for real. also more of the dealing with anger thing. that's a big plus for me always but in this moment? right now? i kinda wanna say? its ren? i do say quite often that i actually think about him maybe more than any of the other characters, i just usually dont vocalize it because i am often worried im embellishing and taking liberties with his intended character. and the thoughts can get very complicated for personal reasons that i wont get into and because it took a long time to get to this place with him as a character compared to the others. he was my least favorite by far when i first played. but i just cannot help myself but infer from his dialogue now that ive played like 80 times and picked all the options that there is just so much more to him than could ever have fit into the game. ren is cup fucking overflowing like there is so much of his emotional issues bursting out of the seams through the whole game and i am just so endeared to him and his thoughts and motivations. he is also just a little guy to me who is funny of course, but he isnt a little guy in the comfy, brotherly, jonas way. he is a poor little wet cat of a man to me with the most adhd a person can have. i want to know about his past and his future almost more than anyone else because, and it is wild, for how much ren talks and overshares, we really don't know a lot about his life before the island. we know like, ALL of the details, but none of the core. he "needs to be needed" and has a therapist and needed a baby sitter until he was 14 and we will just...never know the core of why! how much did michael's death hurt him? we know how it affected alex, and clarissa, and even jonas by proxy! but even if he wasn't friends with michael, he still grew up with him. and knowing how close he was to alex...y'know? and we just never really...find out a lot there. and somehow that absence of knowledge speaks more to me about his character than any direct info ever would? he cannot help but be kind of a damaged little dude who spews his needs and fears at the drop of a hat, but i don't think he likes being that way. he wants and likes to be jokey and deflective and just have a good fucking time. and i both feel bad for him because of that and understand completely? even if he himself has not gone through something traumatic, everyone around him has. so why wouldn't he just want to make a space where they can all just have fun? sorry he just makes me insane. anyway. yeah, ren right now. i think. clarissa or jonas usually. probably alex tomorrow. i will shut up now because i should, not because i don't have more to say. i will always have more to say about these characters. man