#if im missing pieces its because i didnt count i promise they didnt let him eat any!!
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maybe too young for shogi 😓
#naruto#boruto#shikatema#shikamaru nara#temari#shikamaru#nara temari#temari nara#nara shikamaru#shikadai#shikadai nara#nara shikadai#boruto next generation#boruto next generations#nyooome draws#if im missing pieces its because i didnt count i promise they didnt let him eat any!!
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ITS NEVER OVER |||
+ (WHERE HAVE YOU GONE)
word count: 1.7?
Paul atreides x Reader (Always safe for POC + PLUS SIZE) Paul POV!!!
warnings: signs of depression? were happy in there tho, proof read? yeah something like that (god i am not good at these😭) y/n is not in this chapter but ofc shes mentioned entirely throughout the text.
A/N: AHHHHHH THE FINAL CHAPTER BEFORE THE FINALE, IM EXCITED TO POSTTTT, i hope you guys enjoyed and i love the feedback i recieved! i love you all, have a good day/night, whenever you get this! (Also, considering that this is from pauls POV i thought that i might add an extra title)
Hey! Have you read the first chapters? You didnt? What! Read it here!! I . II . III . IV.
Hmm? You said you like shii’z writing?! Omg me too! Check out her masterlist!
He let out a heavy breath before he ripped his mask off of his face. He wasn't supposed to be out alone considering he was the new crowned emperor. But he was, and he was searching for you and he wasn't gonna give up until he did. He wore heavy clothing to try and hide his identity from others, and a bag that slung around his shoulder consisting of his journal, water, and other things he might need. He settles for the night in a rock. A rock with a beautiful view. He has been on the road for so long, he's forgotten how long, he didn't really care to remember either, considering it would help motivate to find you. He walks around the rock, searching for anything to give him clues of you or if you might've been here.
As he looked around, It was clear that someone had been there before. He looked at the bad attempt of making a bed, but he didn't touch it. His eyes slightly closed from trying to study the bed, there were still prints of a body, maybe two, on the bed. He hunches over. There was a piece of hair, as disgusting as it sounds…he picked it up. It was the same as yours, he took a rather long pause before thinking, maybe he should smell the bed? No, what if he smells something he doesn't like. He shook his head before looking at the single strand of hair that was in his hand. He sat down on the bed, setting the hair gently aside before taking off his glove and putting the strand back in his palm. Everybody's hair could be similar, he thought. He let out a sigh before looking ahead of him. He didn't know what time it was, but all he knew was that he was tired and heart broken. He didn't miss his home, not at all, not with you not there.
He put his glove and his mask back on before placing the hair into his bag. Out of everything that was going on, at least the view was beautiful. He stood and walked to the view of the rock, carelessly taking footsteps before he sighed and dropped down, his legs open and his elbows on his knees as he took in the view. He let in a deep breath. ¨tired. I am tired¨ he let out in a whisper. He fought his sleep often because he knew it would make him less confident and he would grow to slack, but sometimes he just couldn't take it anymore. The yawns leaving his lips, difficulty holding onto the hooks that latched onto the sandworm, but he thought he could finally settle here for a while, as a reward for finding a piece of hair that have a 5 percent chance of being yours.
As he watched the view, he thought of you. He didn't cry as much anymore. When he cried, he cried alone in private. And during that time, he cried until he couldn't anymore. Every time he saw Irulan it made him sick to his stomach. As much as he wanted to blame her, he couldn't. His heart was too good and he knew better than to let a weak desperate moment turn into anger. ¨why did i offer?¨ he would think over and over, countless times, wondering how could he be so careless. But he wasn't, he didn't want to marry her for the reason of love, just wanted to keep her safe as a promise to the retired and overthrown emperor. Thinking about it made him question his character, who has he grown to be? hed remembered what you said, he always thought of the smart and wise things you had to say.
¨its okay to feel how you feel, paul¨ you looked at him with a pity smile on your face while your hand was on his cheek. He had another nightmare. He didn't want it to be true. ¨this is gonna make me go crazy, y/n¨ paul whispered back, leaning into y/ns touch. ¨don't let it fool you, don't let it phase you, don't let it change you¨ you replied. At times, all paul wanted to do was give up. He didnt wanna be the chosen one. It was all too much. He could stay here forever, with you. For all eternity if he could.
Paul sighs and looks to the side. Remembering what you said, he wished things weren't so quiet.he laughed to himself, all the dreams he had of the future, but none of you. He sat alone, all alone, not one book, not one sound, just him, by himself. He felt empty, he wants you, he needs you, he needed someone to make him feel complete again, but days spread thick and long, bored, fighting himself back and forth between hope for finding you and wondering if you had just moved on. He wished he had a dream of you, of your blue eyes glistening in the sun, of your laugh, He wished it was so vivid that he touched you, that he could control his dream and talk to you, make love to you, but he had nothing, nothing at all. Nothing to remember you by, just a stupid suspicious piece of hair, tears brimmed his eyes, he needs you. There was no one he could pray to if he was the chosen one. No matter how hard he fought, how he tried to distract himself from work, it all lead up to one person, not one other thought, never out of sight out of mind, he knew what he wanted and he fell so deep he felt like he just couldn't grasp it anymore, how was he supposed to live his life without you. Your soft gentle hands grazing his face and answering the stupid and goofy questions he asked. There was no one else and he knew that now, didn't even find anyone else attractive. Lonesome nights, he didn't want to be on his own, ever again. Once he found you he vowed to never let you go, no matter how loud your voice is, no matter if you kicked him down, your in his heart and he just cannot let go, but how long could he search? Huh? How long would it be until he found you? When will he hear your voice again? When will he kiss you again? He didn't even say I love you before you walked off, for all he knew, that was his last goodbye.
On the first day, he acted as if nothing happened, but then he realized you weren't there, he couldn't pick at your dinner plate, he could hear your laughs, he couldn't feel your pity hits after he whispers a dirty joke. He had no one to talk to, no one to ask him if he was okay. Was he...okay? Had he known he was okay? Or has he grown so long to the point where he wasnt and he just didn't know it. He wished he said more, begged you to stay, cried about it, weeped about it, there was so much he could've done and he didn't, he only said a short explanation of how he was waiting for you and now he's on the run, on the search. He was so tired, so tired of looking at the same spice on the ground, carving on the rock of the walls. He wanted to be next to you, holding your head in his shoulder, hear your soft snores as you slept like there wasn't a care in the world. He'd never expect this, a life without you. He sighed and shook the thought out of his head, noticing he was in too deep and he wiped the tears that slowly dropped from his face, letting out a sniffle as he looked ahead. He didn't want to be too deep, of course he missed you, but he wanted to find you with a clear conscience, a healthy mind. He needed something to keep him going. His eyebrows furrowed as he looked to the ground. He placed a palm down and leaned closer to the floor. What is this? This imprint on the floor? Looks familiar.
He looked over it, careful not to move or make any sudden movements. ¨y/n?¨ he muttered. Any normal person would've thought paul as crazy, looking like he's searching for spice on the floor, and then wanting to jump and cheer, because, well, because what?
The necklace
The necklace Paul got for her. It was there! Clear as day. What a time to cheer! He couldn't fight off the smile on his lips. She's alive! She's alive! What a joy, out for two years! Been all around Arrakis, and at such a time he was going to give up, go home, force himself to get comfortable with his new situation, you were out there. Shall he go home? To tell stilgar and have a celebration? Sweet red wine sounded like heaven. He wiped his eyes as finally, finally tears came down. Tears of joy, he waited for this moment, oh so long! He was so happy he could take the dirt and put it in his bag also.
He laughed, he found it funny how he grew so tired of being next to his queen that he went and found you himself after he told you to come back. He grew impatient. He took out his journal and wrote, writing his life away as he thought of you, as the warmness of love and hope crowded his vision and spreaded throughout his body. This is all he wanted, to find you. And he was so close, so, so close.
He hadn't felt like this in a long time. He got up and collected the dirt from the necklace in his hand and watched it fall from his gloves. Looking around and seeing the footsteps, all yours he believed! He looked before following the footsteps, he followed them foot by foot until he was in the sand again. He hunched over, trying to search for the footsteps as they were getting lost from the wind of the sand until he couldn't anymore. He stood and pulled out his compass for the direction that you went. When it pointed he saw and lifted his head in the direction you went. This was it, this was the final piece, this was the end.
You were home.
Taglist 🏷️
@ennycutie @cookiezxx
#dune part 2#paul atredies x black!reader#paul atredies x reader#paul atreides#timothee chalamet x reader#timothee chamalet x black!reader#timothee x you#paul atreides x reader#timothee chalamet smut#paul atredies smut
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Chapter 10
Chapter 11
I have never wrote such sad content... ALSO IM FINALLY OUT OF SCHOOL HAHA!
Also I’m working on a Atsumu reader!! I’m excited for that one because it’s going to be a cute one.
☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆
" Why! Why! " I cried
why did he leave...not me?
Iwaizumi got up with anger.
" YOU GUYS DID THIS? EVEN IF YOU DIDN'T KILLED OIKAWA AND KILLED HER INSTEAD WE PROBABLY WOULD'VE BEEN DEAD! "
" Hey WE DIDNT THINK HE WAS GOING TO MOVE FOR HER! " Atsumu shouted.
" THAT'S NOT THE POINT ATSUMU! "
" WHY DID YOU GUYS CARED SO MUCH ABOUT THEIR RELATIONSHIP?! " Iwaizumi shouted louder.
" ITS FORBIDDEN FOR THEM TO GET TOGETHER! " Atsumu yelled.
" WE WERE TRYING TO FORM AN ALLIANCE WITH THEM! MAYBE OIKAWA AND HER COULD'VE BEEN THE GATEWAY TO THAT! "
" WAS THE ALLIANCE REALLY GOING TO WORK?! THINK ABOUT IT NEITHER OF US LIKES EACH OTHER! " Atsumu said sarcastically.
" THAT'S IT I HAD ENOUGH OF YOUR SHIT! "
Iwaizumi try to hit Atsumu but I got in between.
" Y/N! GET OVER HERE NOW! " Suga yelled
" NO NO NO! NOT UNTIL THIS GETS RESOLVE! " I yell as tears stream down my face.
" Iwaizumi, please... DONT hit him. I have already seen enough... "
My heart was aching from the pain... I can't bear to see anyone getting hurt right now even if they don't like us.
"You're lucky enough she stopped me you stupid pig! " Iwaizumi told Atsumu.
" Yeah well, she did- "
Atsumu was interrupted by a voice.
" That's ENOUGH ATSUMU! "
A demon with half black and silver hair shouted with anger.
" Kit- Kita.."
" This is how low you got... I'm disgusted. " Kita said in an angry tone.
" It's not what it sees-"
" It's defiantly what it seems. "
" And you. " Kita points at me , I decided to hide behind Iwaizumi.
" Why have you come here knowing it was risky for what May happen to you... " he questioned.
" Uh well, I did it out of love... I loved Toru but I did-"
I'm starting to choke on my tears.
Kita stared at all three of us.
Suga was next to Iwaizumi also protecting me.
" Who else knows the King is dead.. "
" Just the ones who are currently at the scene right now Sir.. "
" Who's idea was killing her? " Kita asked firmly.
" Atsumu and Tendou's sir... " one of the guards said.
" and Angel what's your name? " he asked
" Uh, y/n sir.. "
" Does anyone on your side knew about this affair? "
" Only Suga did but others started to figure out... " I say
" We have to inform everyone about this," he says coldly.
" Guards pick up Oikawa we have to prep for the funeral. "
The guards did what Kita said, I stood there frozen as I process the love of my life gone...
Kita demanded the others to leave because he must figure out the punishment for what they did to Oikawa.
Now there were only 3 of us, I, Suga, and Iwaizumi stood there.
I once again collapse as I cried longing for Oikawa...
What if I go too.
Negative Thoughts ponder through my head until I feel a hug from behind.
It was Suga and Iwaizumi with both tears in their eyes. I guess it was self-fish of me thinking I was the only one in pain.
Of course, Iwaizumi was hurting he lost his best friend his wing man. As for Suga, he felt guilty too, just like me.
" Suga... Iwaizumi what are we going to do now... " I say with tears down my face.
" Princess all I know is I have to protect you because that's what Oikawa would want. " Iwaizumi said wiping my tears away.
" And as for me, I'll stay by your side no matter what. " Suga said with a faint smile.
At that moment I was grateful for them... I know I couldn't do anything self-fish because Oikawa would want me to live my life and change the world as we promise one another.
For a couple of minutes, everything still felt surreal.
" Ok then... We have to fix this mess... " I say.
" How are we going to Princess? Kageyama told the others about Oikawa.. and now that he died for your sake it's going to cause an uproar. " Suga said concerned.
" Iwaizumi do you know what time or have any idea of when Kita will inform everyone?! " I ask
" No I don't but I will figure it out, on the other hand, you two should go back and try to figure out what's going on," he said in a firm voice.
" Ok then... " I say as I get up from the ground.
" And Suga promise me one thing! " Iwaizumi said as we both got up.
" yes? "
" Protect and keep y/n safe. "
" As if I would never! " Suga slightly chuckles.
" Ok we must get going we will meet up once Kita informs both sides. "
Then we were off, Iwaizumi went to go see what was happening as I and Suga went to go see too.
Once I and Suga arrived at our site, we see everyone standing there with suspicion.
" Wheres the demon y/n? " Dachi questioned in a harsh tone.
" Not here. " I say coldly
" What do you mean not here? "
" He is dead. All for stupid desires of selfish people. "
" You shouldn't be the one saying who is selfish when you were too. "
My heart started aching, even more, Dachi is right. I was selfish too for going back to see him. Maybe if I didn't see him, he would of still been alive.
" DACHI THAT'S ENOUGH! " Suga yelled.
" Yes I WAS SELFISH TOO BUT SOMETIMES YOU HAVE TO BE SELFISH TO CHANGE THINGS. WHY CAN'T WE JUST GET ALONG... I DON'T UNDERSTAND. DACHI DO YOU KNOW WHAT ITS LIKE TO FEEL BROKEN? RESPONSIBLE FOR A DEATH? " I shouted at him and for everyone to hear I couldn't bear this anymore.
" Y/N I- "
" NO Dachi I'm done. You and the others clearly don't want to change. " I run right through them, I can hear Suga yelling my name but I couldn't handle the pain anymore. It should've been me not Oikawa, now I'm here all alone with this guilt.
I kept running as tears streamed down my face, at that moment I made up my mind on the decision I was doubtful of.
Once I get to the Palace I go in the training quarters, I grab a dagger. 
I'm hesitant about this, yes... but is it for the best I don't know.
My hands started to shake as I hold the dagger.
"It's fine in a count of one, two,th-"
" Y/N! " Suga ran towards me as he tackled me on the ground.
" WHAT ARE YOU DOING ?! "
" SUGA I CAN'T DO THIS ANYMORE! "
" YES, YOU CAN! "
Once again my eyes were in tears, I can't do this anymore.
" Shhh Shhh " Suga hugged me as I weep on the ground.
" Come on let's go in your room. "
Suga dragged me to my room.
" I'm not going anywhere until you sleep. "
I was too weak to talk I just lay there in bed as my heart was broken into pieces.
My eyes got weaker and weaker until I open my eyes to only see I was in a garden.
I got up from the ground, the garden seemed familiar but I cannot remember where.
The garden was vivid, there were flowers, trees, and many more things. I walked around until I bumped into someone.
" OW watch whe- " said a male voice.
I think my eyes were fooling me, it was him... Oikawa Toru.
" Toru? " My eyes being to water, he was also shocked and came in for a hug.
" OH, HOW I MISSED YOU! "
Oikawa hugs me tighter. I can feel his presence it's really him.
" Hey DONT cry I'm here to say Princess! " he says as he wipes my tears.
" Promise.. "
" I promise, we have married after all ! " he chuckles.
Suga pov:
I woke up frantically, I fell asleep on accident.
I get up from the chair to check on y/n on the bed. She has fallen asleep with tears in her eyes. As I use my finger to wipe her tears, I noticed something.
She seemed pale...
" Hey, y/n wake-up... "
No movement or response...
" Hey, This isn't a time to joke around wake up.. "
My heart dropped... She can't be... How?! I was with her all night.
There her lifeless body on her bed...
I look around her room to only find an empty bottle of nightshade on the ground.
I stood there frozen...
She was gone.. .the pain really took her away.
Chapter 12 / Epilogue
#oikawa x reader#iwaizumi hajime#haikyuu fantasy au#haikyu x reader#fanfic#haikyuu x female reader#oikawa x female reader#oikawa angst
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Life After Snowpiercer: One Problem at a Time
Summary- Curtis x Y/N. You and Curtis reunite, deal with some issues in the valley and reconnect 2 of the groups. Tension between you and Curtis. Warnings- Violence
Word Count- 5.3k
Chapter 6 / Masterlist
The firing from above was surprising, You and Johanna witnessed Wilfords old guard squad shout out in alarm and close ranks retreating. Johanna lowered the rifle, and breathed out hard enough to flip the hair that fell in her eyes back. “I dont know who it is... but they are pushing them back.” You sneak a peek out to see if you can catch sight of anyone, but thats when you hear the cry of alarm behind you, and you pull back, disappearing inside. Following your name being cried out, you see where someone got a ricochet. It had luckily lost some of its momentum, but still embedded enough to cause blood to blossom all over there shoulder and clutch at it to stop the bleeding.
“Shit” You try to drag the man into the nearest light without making yourselves possible targets. “Shirt off... Whats your name?” You ask as you maneuver him, grabbing the hem of his shirt and start to pull it over his head.
He grunted as you lifted the shirt over his head. “Mickey... we was trying to get the kids into the back once we heard the firing started, but not fast enough apparently.” His eyes watered a bit, but other then that, he stayed perfectly still.
“Yea it got pretty dicey there for a bit. Does anyone have a knife?” You start hold out your hand till someone shoves a military grade blade into it and you start cutting off pieces of clothing off one of his shirts, and directing him to sit down, so you at least didnt have to go to your tip toes to dig out the shard. “Okay Mickey, Im gonna be as quick as I can, promise. Just please dont move.”
“No worries Miss, I can handle it.” He took a deep breath and nodded in affirmation that he was ready. Lets get this done, you coached yourself, never actually having removed anything like this. Your head tilted and the tip of your tongue stuck out as you started to use the tip to wedge along one side. Mickey was true to his word and stayed still, allowing you to dig further into his flesh till THERE, the tip slid underneath and you could pop it out “Got it!”
Wadding the piece of cloth against the seeping wound, you are careful not to touch anything as his blood was all over your hands. “Be right back, keep the pressure on it.” John stepped in to monitor him as you make your way back to Johanna who was looking through the scope up at the cliff. “Son of a bitch, hes gonna do it....”
“Safe to go out and scrub my hands you think, and do what?” You question as you look over her shoulder, and Johanna drops the scope to look without the assistance to the top of the cliff. “This bastard, hes gonna jump down., OH HELL THERE HE GOES!” This is when you lean out and your jaw drops.
Curtis pulled back the rifle when he thought he saw you, holding his breath, hoping for another glance, anything to confirm it was you he saw. Rolling away from the edge, and up to his feet, he paced the edge for a moment. “I gotta get down there now, do we have any rope?” He asked the person closest to him, the man shaking his head and asking another nearby. Resounding negatives sounded, and Curtis just didnt have the time to search the train cars for any. Looking over the edge, he studied the way down, noticing small juts of ice build up on what he guessed were ledges, he formed an idea. Was it crazy? Most likely, but what the fuck. Sliding the rifle strap over his shoulder, he held it out to anyone close by. “Give me an axe, Im gonna need you all to cover me while I make my way to the train car.”
The man whom he had asked for rope earlier looked down the side as if studying what Curtis had been looking at, frowning for a moment in thought, then his eyes widened. “Man you cant.”
Curtis didnt even pause as he hefted the axe, checking it was one with the sharper blades, and swung it around in a loop once, twice, three times to loosen his good arm. “Man I am.”
“Thats could be a damn suicide jump. Your gonna break your legs, even with the deeper snow at the bottom, you have no clue whats down there!.”
Curtis shifted to the edge, turning his body so that his good side holding the axe would be close to the cliff wall. “Yea well, I might not know what, but I know who is down there, and who knows when those fuckers will be back.”
CURTIS EVERETT, I SWEAR TO GOD IF YOU DIE, YOU AND ME BUDDY, WERE THROUGH.
No were not, and I will be fine, trust me.
Trust you? Fucken hell Curtis your lucky I do.
Thats my girl.
And it seemed like he just stepped off the edge, plunging the axe into the snow and ice on the side, it slowed him down slightly in his descent, and he was able to steer himself enough to land on the ledge he was aiming for. For all of five seconds.
It gave out from under him “Oh shit” he exclaimed as he dropped down, trying to smash the axe head back into the side, it finally went in, but he just sped up more, bouncing off the wall once in a while, fuck his ribs. Well they are definitely broken now if they werent before, and all around him white rolls of snow started shifting, and racing down with him. Soon it was enough to be considered an avalanche, and he landed heavily at the bottom, a dumping of snow landing on top of him.
You jumped out of the train, with Johanna leaning out trying to catch you and stop you from taking off. But you rolled out of her grip. “Y/N! Come back, its not safe!” But damn it, you werent paying attention to anything but Curtis falling down the side of the cliff. HE JUMPED! THAT BASTARD JUMPED, GOD DAMN IT CURTIS! you screamed internally as you plowed your way through snow almost to your knees, falling every now and then, and struggling to get up, the whole time your panicked mutters of “nonononono” filled a bit of the silence after the snow crashed on top of itself at the bottom. By the time you reached the cliff face, all around you was just white swirls where the snow had yet to properly settle. “Curtis! Where are you?” You yelled out, looking all around you, but nothing, just white. Unsettled wisps blowing in your face.
“Come on baby, answer me” your voice is starting to panic as you start searching under you, for anything Curtis shaped. If hes trapped under the snow, hes going to suffocate, sobs of fear escaping, and tears brimming your vision. You plunge your arms into what looks like the deepest snowbank and dig like your life depended on it. It did, it did depend on it. Why was he so fucken stupid? Jumping off a cliff, god damn you Curtis, if you leave me alone here... Your wheezing, completely unaware he had come up behind you, and in true Curtis fashion, he grasped your hips and swung you around. Shocked, your looking up at those familiar blue eyes, adrenaline had blown his pupils wide with the rush, and he to is panting, clumps of ice and snow in his beard and his whole face is red where it had been covered in snow. For seconds your just staring at him, but then, you let him have it.
Your fist comes against his chest in a rage, bouncing off his pecks, and your just raging at this point. “what the fucken hell Curtis, you could have DIED! You idiot! Died, dead, gone, no more, do you hear me?!” He allowed it for a bit, but then he caught your hands and drew you in as the sobs of fear broke from you, struggling in his hold and grabbing his face, that damn face you love so damn much it hurt, one you were so scared for and mad at and just beyond relieved to have back because you were hurting all over and wanted to sink into his arms and be told that it was gonna be okay, that damn face. You crashed your lips against his, kissing him fiercly and possessively, only breaking apart when the loss of air burned your lungs and your head swam with dizziness.
“Dont you ever do something like that again! God your such an Idiot, I love you” your forehead leaning against his, and his eyes looked in yours and you could see that he would again without question, and before he could say that, you nip his lip softly to keep him quiet and roam your hands over his chest and pull back. You werent allowed to go to far, as he yanked you back in, his own hands searching you for anything out of the norm, cupping your face and placing a softer, but no less desired kiss on your lips “I wasnt going to leave you down here baby, I thought Ive lost you endless times over the past few days. I knew I saw you. I had to get down here. Especially with those fuckers coming for you.”
Your hands slide into his coat, and that familiar warmth starts to seep into your burning cold fingertips and his oversized hands wipe your face dry, kissing across the cheeks and your nose to calm you down, leaning his forehead once more against yours. “You couldnt ask me to leave my girl here and not to to get to you, right?” And with that, your anger dissipates much like the remaining snow crystals in the air that swirl near you, your combined heat melting them away. Relief floods you and you sigh, leaning into him, God I need you so damn much. His arms enclose you and for the first time in days your okay.
“All of it, they said they were just toying with you the entire time.” You breath out and pull back enough to look at him. “Did you get all the way there? I assumed so once the train derailed.”
Curtis was going to have to tell her all that happened, and that was the big news about her brother, in that he was dreading. Not that her brother was alive, but what they twisted the man into. He nodded, and decided it would have to be later, once they were safely settled, could he break the news to her then. “Yes, we lost good people.... but they got me to the front, got me to Wilford. Come on, we have to get out of sight. I have a few people up top to cover us.” You didnt inquire anymore at the moment, following along in his footsteps as best as possible, your hand still fisted in his, loathe to let it go. You could easily see he was hurting, the way he took jagged steps. But you woudnt know more till he would really let you look him over No guns had to be fired, and maybe there luck was turning around.
Johanna had the gun trained on Curtis till You stepped around him and waved your hand that it was okay, and she pulled back. As you two approached, Curtis climbed inside and held out his hand, greeting her with a thanks. “Damn glad Y/N had you with her Johanna.” She nodded her your welcome and turned to you.
“If your planning on moving anyone, theres a couple who are beat up pretty bad. Your friend Sara is definitely suffering from blood loss, and we got to relocate a few shoulders.” Hearing the women discuss the injuries, Curtis was relieved it wasnt anything worst. But as he caught sight of the survivors, he knew why. There must be more casualties then survivors. They were a weary bunch, the kids all huddled together, sleeping or whispering to themselves, adults wandering back and forth unable to relax, some leaning back against the wall, holding there arm or shoulder from where it came out of joint in the fall. “Has anyone been able to go through the cars?” Curtis asked as you came up beside him.
“No, once we landed, I got the kids to gather supplies, and then the guards tried to collect us. We bolted right out and headed to the cliff face. Others followed us. Paul told me that his cart had usable food in it and thats as far as we've been able to plan ahead." John came up to join them, listening in and introducing himself to Curtis.
"Probably would have either went into the other cars today, see if anyone survived the night or tried to find a way up. These are all the back end cars.... Short of the protein blocks, no other usable supplies. Old threadbare blankets, maybe some clothing." John mentioned, leaving Curtis nodding in agreement. He was right, all the usable supplies were in the front, they went through several freezer carts of beef and chicken, a garden cart, a bit of live stock in another, even an oversized tank that might still have usable food in it, he was sure once the train derailed any heating system went off, and it might all be frozen solid. And then not even mentioning supplies such as medicine and other goods. As Wilford mentioned before, it was an entire enclosed ecosystem. One that Curtis ripped wide open now.
"Theres a group up there waiting for us... The last of the tail enders and a few others, simple fact is we gotta move everyone up. Safer for us to be in a group then spread out, especially with Wilfords old buddies.” Curtis said that last part sarcastically, and you glanced at Curtis.
“Well we cant climb up the way you came down, especially with people like Sara. Someones got to find a trail if there are any”
So it was decided a couple would go look along the cliff face, see if there was a reasonable way up, John volunteered along with another man. They bundled up as best they could, blankets draped over there shoulders and they warily started along the trail you and Curtis made earlier. Now onto the next issue, You knew you should have taken care of the out of joint patients, more things like clothing was needed, some of these people were shivering with blue lips and fingertips. Fuck what a disaster. All of it. A hand came to your back and Curtis slipped up behind you as you watched the two men continue down your trail. You leaned back into his chest, and closed your eyes for a minute. Letting everything just go still inside you, just having him back eased you a bit.
“We will be okay babygirl, get them all up and continue on our way.” His fingers brushed aside your hair laying against your neck and he dipped his head to kiss the curve, his lips soft brushes along the length. You enjoyed the sensation for a few moments, familiar and warming. But then enclosed when his hand moved to settle on your stomach and hold you in close, your breathing hitches. Why? Whats wrong? And you fight out of the haze clouding your mind, and pushing his hand back and away, turning to face Curtis. “We probably better get to those patients. Help me with them?” You brush past him and head into the back, frowning at yourself for how you just reacted, knowing exactly what it was, but admitting it was an entirely different story.
Curtis was surprised when you pulled away, about to stop you and ask what that was, but it had been hell for the past few days, so it would be understandable if you werent yourself. Following along with you, you were talking to Sara, who Curtis vaguely recognized from the back end. Lifting the rag she had used to keep pressed against her shoulder. “Im sorry I didnt get this out sooner Sara, but I got to now.” Another mistake, you think to yourself. There is a bit of redness and streaks blooming around it. Fuck why didnt you take care of this last night. With the way she was shot, you were sure there might be more then just a slug embedded in there. “Come on, lets go in the light.” You two go forward and as you pass Curtis, you encourage her to continue where Johanna was perched in the doorway, watching.
“Curtis we definitely need more clothing, something for at least the kids to wrap up in. They will freeze with what they have now out there.” Your almost reach out to touch him, then pull back, stuffing your hands in your sleeves instead.
“Yup, we will get it. Work on Sara and the others, we will be back soon.” He didnt push to touch you or share affection, but you tugged him back and placed a speedily kiss on his lips last minute. A ‘im sorry’ for earlier for yourself, he flashed you look that spoke volumes, then spun away and his voice boomed “Listen up, you... you... and you, were gonna be hitting up some of these cars... you....” Walking away, you felt more in control now, hearing him take control and having a plan in place. Sara was sitting with Johanna, looking exhausted, but holding a conversation.
Withdrawing the knife you used earlier, you have Sara sit in the light, Johanna lowers back to her earlier spot, the rifle hanging out the door to keep watch. Bringing her shirt down enough to take a look at the wound, you sigh. “Like with Mickey, this is gonna hurt like a bitch. And I gotta make sure nothing is left in there.” Sara nodded and once more you dug for the bullet. Sara hunched a bit and did her best to stay still, a gasp escaping once in a while, but overall when she slouched forward into Johanna, you knew she passed out. Good, make this easier.
“Sorry, let me just finish this and we can move her” You state and Johanna nods, moving to cradle the woman while you hear a plink! to the bullet falling out, and a few more pokes and prods, the blood seeping down, hesitant but hopeful that will finish cleaning the wound. “Okay, think shes good.” You use the rag she was earlier to put pressure on it and once it seemed to stop bleeding so much, you two move her, already Sara was stirring much to your satisfaction. “Just hang out here a bit, m’kay?” A nod and wince as she puts the rag back to be sure it wouldnt start bleeding.
Then you went through the rest, relocating joints, checking nicks and cuts. A few people you found out had busted ribs, one had a arm that should be put in a splint, but there simply was no way to do so. “Just... keep it close to your body and dont move it. It will heal, in time.” Putting together a make shift sling with a shirt someone volunteered. Just as you were finishing up, Curtis and a few others returned, arms bundled in clothing, and as you two dispersed them among people, and bundling the kids up, you quietly ask him.
“Was there alot.... of people... ?”
“Yea baby, more then I thought there would be. Some of them, its hard to tell if it was before or after the crash.” He passed off a jacket to someone and looked at you. “Then there were others that just.... Its a lot.”
You didnt push him, ask where he was going with that sentence, you had an idea of what it meant, and you didnt even want to have him have to explain his choice. People dont always survive.
He continued, handing off the last item, and turning to you. “We only went through a few, but we cant wait any longer. And I found where those guards were hanging out, They have been collecting supplies in the further cars, as much as could be had”
You swallow a bit, and keep yourself busy with the thought of them. “Where are they now?”
“I dont know, they wandered away from the cars at some point. Im assuming they didnt have a aim on them up above and they werent coming back around to us.” Curtis shook his head as they started getting people up, moving them forward. “But if they do... “ Curtis rumbled softly under his breath. You pause and rest your hand against his back, inside dreading the coming conversation. He was already so on edge to them being out there. Johanna called then to you two, and John ducked back inside. “Well we found what looks like an animal trail. Goes right up along the side, and looks like its well used. Do you think... theres really something alive out there?”
A shrug and nod from you “Were still alive, right? We can only guess as to what survived after the freeze.”
It was painfully slow, John and Adam, as you come to find out what the other mans name was, led the group, you stayed with the kids, and helped Sara as much as she was able to stand, behind you were more of the adults, including Curtis and Johanna who were making sure no one fell behind. When you finally crested the top, you stepped off to the side, huffing with exertion, the people who had remained at the top cars were helping others inside or near some fires they all were able to start, clearly they had been busy while you all were coming up out of the valley. Curtis came up beside you, a groan of his own as his hand pressed against his left side. “Lets get inside babes, then we can take a break. We all need one.”
Sara was collected and helped to where the other people were recovering, and Tam rushed up to the two of you once you entered the car “Hey, I got the kids, Edgar is sitting up already, and his back is looking much better.” You look confused for a moment, and Curtis shakes his head at you. “I will explain later. Thanks Tam, if everyones set, were going to go settle in somewhere for the night.” Assured that everything would be handled, Curtis led you away, these were similar to the tail end car, just with windows. Curtis was quick to find you two a empty bottom bunk. You crawled in first, and leaned against the wall, your head tipping back. Fuck you were so tired, and he semi collapsed next to you in a similar fashion.
You turn just your head to look at him, and smile when you see hes doing the same thing. There hadnt been any chance to really just be with one another since reuniting and you reach your hand out, weaving your fingers with his. “Hey.... Thank you for keeping your promise and coming back to me.”
He sat up a bit more and let go of your hand, wrapping an arm around you and pulling you in close, placing a kiss to your forehead, whispering. “Im sorry for leaving you like that babygirl. All I could think of was keeping you safe.” You put your hand against his mouth.
“Handsome its fine, I know why you did it. Tell me what happened.” You inquired, and Curtis fell into how he pushed the group through each car, the ones they found that was possible to find supplies and food in for them, how the bridge claimed so many of them, one of whom he thought was Edgar, but that wasnt the case. How Nam wanted to blow open the side, jump from the train when he wouldnt open that final door, and this is where he stalled. He had to tell her. All of it. Her brother, his arm... he managed to keep it hidden this whole time, the pain a background noise at this point.
“Babygirl come here, I just... need to hold you. I really thought I lost you.” He hauled you into his lap, and you tensed up momentarily when his arm circled around you, rubbing your lower back and side. But this was Curtis, you were safe. Under his hand you finally relaxed, and your head rested on his shoulder, he started in on the next part of his story. The rumble of his chest lulled you, while you listened. Wilford offered a deal, and Curtis admitted that he considered it. You lifted your head and looked at him. “You wouldnt have been able to live with yourself” He nodded, and leaned forward to kiss your lips softly. “Your right, I would have become everything I hated. Baby, this next part, you got to listen to me. Okay? the whole part before any questions.”
“Curtis what is it?” Your brow furrows with concern at his words.
“Matt, your brother... Hes alive, and he still is. I left him back at the front.”
Your silent for a moment, and he could see your mind racing, processing his words.
“Hes still alive... Matts still here.” And the joy that crossed your face broke Curtis heart because fuck he was going to have to tell you just how far gone he was, that there wasnt the compassionate little boy anymore. But a man with cold resolve and placed himself above the others, for he was the prodigy.
“Baby, he isnt who you think he is, not anymore.” Curtis hands captured your face to make you pay attention to him. “Wilford trained him to be his successor, brainwashed. He has no compassion for any of the people, were something to control.”
“What? No Curtis, he loved us, He wouldnt forget, unless he thinks I let him go.” Your thoughts are spinning out of control, just what Curtis didnt want. You pull back from him then “He cant be that bad, I mean, Once I explain all that was going on, he will see.” A saddened look crossed Curtis face, reaching out to draw you back to him.
“Baby we can try... but they were using our kids to run the train, put them right into the engine, and afterwards... Executed if they served no more purpose. Under his order, he was set on killing Yona, Nam and I if I didnt agree to there terms.” He couldnt even bring up the way your brother talked about you, the callousness of his words in discussing you, whom loved him more then yourself.
“No... he wouldnt have been okay with it.” Your breathing grows more rapid and Curtis rubs your arms to comfort you.
“I know baby, Im sorry... “ He was doing everything he could to calm you, but it was only setting you off worst. Again you pulled away from him, drawing your legs up and hugging around your knees, what are you not telling him? The only time you pulled away was the weeks after Matt was taken and you withdrew into yourself. “Y/N? Talk to me please?” He wants to reach for you, but you’ve just drawn yourself off, quiet as you stare ahead.
Matt wouldnt, Curtis must have misunderstood what happened. He did what he had to to survive, the conclusions you drew. “You said hes still alive? You had to leave him behind, is he safe?”
His hand dropped to his lap, studying you even as you waited for an answer. “He was safe when I left him and Claude. I was told you went over a damn cliff, I honestly had no other concerns.” His tone slightly clipped, and you can see where hes holding it together under a great strain. You unfold yourself, and return into his hold, feeling him once more relax being able to rest his hand on you.
“They had Timmy, in the engine. Whatever they did to him, he was so unhuman acting. Robotic, he wouldnt come out once Nam and I secured the room.” He shifted you and this is the first time you see the tangled mess of his arm when he slid his sleeve up, deep laceration that have scabbed over criss crossing where the gears tore in, but they were still great tears, all of it swollen, and throbbing looking. “Fucken hell Curtis” You cuss as you finish rolling his sleeve up to look at it. “Youve been like this the whole time? Baby you need medicine in case of infection.” So tenderly you inspected it, you seemed more like yourself now, your mind distracted.
Curtis remained still as you went to roll the sleeve back down, and was gnawing on your bottom lip. “God damn handsome, im so sorry.” Your hands went to his face, feeling for any kind of fever, and giving a small smile when he turned into your palm and nipped the center, kissing your fingertips before letting his head once more fall back against the wall. “You seem to not be fighting off an infection though. But I will feel better once we can secure some stuff from the medic car.” You shift to his other side so you dont risk touching his arm, rubbing your hand along the back of his neck. For now you both go quiet, just being together. This time his hand slides along the inside of your thigh, just resting warmly there. You can feel yourself drifting off, and finally he says softly.
“We should get some sleep” He shifted off the wall, and laid down for the first time in days, waiting with a lifted arm for you to do as you always do, curl in against his chest. Which you did, you always did, and stretching out, scooting over till his arm rested over your hip, he tugged you in the rest of the way. His body is hard against your back, and his beard scratches lightly behind your neck as he placed kisses there. Nothing sexual, just a bit of intimacy after such a long time apart. You cant help but tense up, which he notices when you dont sink into him, how your breathing doesnt soften after a few minutes, and he wants to ask you, make you spill whatever it is your holding inside. But he doesnt, he just stays by your side, his hand moving to slide under your shirts and gently let it rest against the softness of your stomach. Wide awake until finally he hears you release a soft snore, a true testament to your exhaustion.
You laid there, your fingers curled into the ticking of the blanket your laying on, your heart a quick flash patter, escape escape escape, this was fucking CURTIS. How could you feel that hot heat of panic flushing your body or that your throat was squeezing air through a straw. You waited, waited for him to tighten his arm around you as he usually did or sprawl you across his chest when he rolled to his back, but he stayed still behind you, and the tension between you two just built. I should tell him, but how can I? For whatever reason, it shamed you that you couldnt fight them off. Finally his fingers just splayed against your stomach where he worked his hand under your shirts and loosely held you. After a while, you couldnt help it anymore, falling asleep. Fuck those men for doing this to you.
@curtisbbq @what-is-your-plan-today @p8tn0lish @jtargaryen18 @jeremyrennerfanxxxx123 @official-and-unstable-satan @thatweirdwalangpake
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✨ Unfiltered Joker thoughts ✨
I watched Joker with a bunch of lovely clowns on my Discord and while they werewolf’d in the chat, I typed out my thoughts here as they came to me. These are unedited, unfiltered, and exactly as they were in my head. I don’t know who’d be interested in this but 🤷♀️ who doesn’t love unfiltered thoughts about our man? NSFW ahead in places, lmao and some self-ship elements because it’s always on my mind.
There are Controversial Things within, I’m sure - be nice about it if you wanna comment, or unfollow/block etc. if it bothers you I won’t take it personally. I will take it personally if I’m sent a rude message, though. Fair warning. You curate your own online experience so scroll past silently if you gotta!🥰🥰🥰🥰
Tagging @arthurflecc @jokerownsmysoul @daincrediblegg @sweet-nothings04 bc they were in the chat and missed me there!!
Word count: 4, 597.
OMGOMGOMGOMGOMGOMGOMG JOKERJOKERJOKERJOKERJOKERJOKERJOKERJOKERJOKERJO -
*Presses play*
OMG THERE HE IS BABYYYYYYYY ~
Ugh that white shirt... 🥵
“paint me like one of your french girls” 👀
oh, honey, no.
Don’t force yourself to smile, my love, it’s okay. you can be hurting.
sweet angel who can do no wrong asdfghjkl
wanna kiss that tear away...
CARNIVALCARNIVAL CARNIVAL *STARTS SWAYING IN MY SEAT*
jaunty piano to juxtapose his shitty mood
you spin me right round, baby, right round...
ohhh, baby 🥺🥺🥺
someone’s honky lmaoooooo ~
that cello
Ohhhh, darling man.... i’m so sorry. I’m sorry I’m sorry I’m sorry I’m sorry
WOOPS CRYINGGGG ~
sweet angel love still tryna be funy with the flower squirting...
what else will squirt tonight???👀
ohhh, darling. deep breaths baby. it’s okay. you’re okay.
CRYINGGGGG
ohhhh baby boyyyy....
legit just cooed aloud
oh angel <3
“is it just me or is it getting crazier out there?”
it is my love... it is.
let me sit on your lap and still the shaking of your legs
ohhhh my love. you’re okay. just breathe.
Dr. Kane was doing her best but you’re beyond what she can handle
you deserve better, sweetheart.
my love, my life.
I JUMPED WHEN HE HIT HIS HEAD IN ARKHAM
“who knows?”
yeah me too, my love. me too.
“i just dont wanna feel so bad anymore”
oh baby.
i know, my love. i wish i could hold your hand and stroke your hair and kiss your cheeks 🥺🥺🥺
had a shitty day but wants to comfort a child on the bus. thats my manssss ~ <3 <3 <3
okay but his peekaboo makes me giggle please do that to me when im sad
“‘cuse you bitch?”
the greasepaint still on his face is endearing omg
GIVE HIM BACK HIS CARD OR IMMA RIOTTTT
CRYINGGGGG
ohhhh baby. no. deep breaths. i’m here, my love. not going anywhere
those fucking steps
me too, darling. i feel your exhaustion like it’s my own and i long to take it from you without changing a single thing about you.
my love, my life
the weariness of an unchanged routine is a paralysing one
wanna rub cream on your bruises
“yeah, mum” so soft im cry
“eat. you need to eat” i hear you in my head when i wanna skip meals and it helps me.
“oh yeah? who do you talk to?” YES SASS HER
“yay murray” ohhhhh angel you’re so cute I’m cry 🥺
murray you wankstain - old and crusty 🤮🤢🤮🤢
arthur’s laugh in his daydream 🥺🥺
“i love you murray” // “you’re awful murray” baby noooooo
“theres something special about you arthur” the only real thing murrat ever fuckin said AND IT WASNT EVEN A REAL THING IT WAS IN HIS HEAD
“I TAKE GOOD CARE OF MY MOTHER” YEEEES BABY YOU DO! SO PROUD OF YOU!!!
just wantin recognition in your daydreams bc you dont get it in your real life
YOU SWEET THING
HIS SWEET SMILE AND THE CELLO OH BABY 🥺😭
YOUR BACK 😭😭😭😭😭😭😭
shoes are too tight so you gotta stretch em
can you stretch me too???👀🥵💦🔥
“chuckletown” RANDALLS LEGACY AND WE TURNED IT INTO SMTHN LOVING AND NOT SARKY LIKE HE INTENDED LMAO FUCK YOU RANDALL YOU PIECE OF SHIIIIIIIIT
arthur’s hair in the sun omg like a halo
randall fuck off fucking fuck off go aWAY LEAVE MY ARTHUR ALONE
you asswipe
arthurs shy and nervous lil giggle omg baby say no give the gun back its not well intended
“my boy” AHA LMAO HE DOES PAY YOU BACK BUT NOT HOW YOU EXPECT LMAOOOO YOU GET WHAT YOU DESERVE
THOSE CURLS
arthur’s sweet little lilting voice in front of his boss omggggg ~
HOYYYYYYT
his logic makes no sense wtffffff ~
RETAIL SMILE LMAO THATS A MOOD
brewing insanity.....
POUND ME LIKE THOSE TRASH BAGS
RUIN ME AND THEN REBUILD ME IN YOUR IMAGE
those mf stairs again
it’s the same old team since 1916... in your head, in your head...
never in my LIFE have i been aroused by a FOOT
lmao only Arthur istg that man is the exception to my every rule
Gigi is so CUTE 🥺
THAT SMIRK SIR CAN YOU NOT
“hey” omggg look at you tryna connect ugh so proud of youuu ~
the moon is a silver dollar...
THOSE CURLS
THOSE BARE FEET
THAT SOFT VOICE
ARTHURRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR
frances conroy is a goddess omg i love herrrr ~
espesh on ahs she’s a queen
but i digress lmao wrong fandom
“dont you have to be funny to be a comedian”
FUCK OFF PENNY
FUCK RIGHT OFF THEN FUCK OFF SOME MORE PLEASE
slap that bass....
FINGERSSS ON THE GUN ASDFGHJ PUT THEM ON ME INSTEADDDD
zoom zoom the world is in a mess
LMAO YEP
“psh” omg you sweet angel asdfghjk
THAT EYEBROW RAISE ASDFGHJK SASSY KINGGGGG
GET ITTTTTT
UGH THAT BODY WANNA COVER IT IN MARKS OF LOVE TO REPLACE THE VIOLENT MARKS
ARTHUR @ HIMSELF “YOURE A GOOD DANCER // I KNOW”
omggggg sweet clumsy babyyyy
lmaooo “old war movie” do you tell penny that when we get caught having sex on the sofa????
arthur honey following sophie isn’t.... the best way to get her attention asdfghjk
someone needs to teach you social interactions...
I VOLUNTEER AS TRIBUTTTTTE
that student/teacher roleplay comedian at pogos makes no sense to me???? i dont get his jokes at all
lmao bad comediannnnnn
arthur’s cute lil mistimed giggles ksksksksk
wanna kiss your cheeks every timmmme
you’re working so hard to achieve your goals im so so proud of you
ambidextroussss ~ (just like me omg we’re perfect for each otherrrrr)
“people expect you to behave as if you dont” YOU INTELLIGENT LIL SHIT OMG I LOVE YOU AND YOUR MIND
you know its a daydream if arthurs wearing a shirt at home
his shy “yeah” omggggg ~ angelllll
“i have a gun i can come by tomorrow” LMAOOOOOOOO
“youre so funny arthur” YES HE IS DREAM!SOPHIE
CARNIVAL CARNIVAL CARNIVAL
I ACTUALLY STOMP MY FEET HERE BC IM HAPPY FOR THE TIME HES ON SCREEN SWEET CLOWN
THE ONLY ONE IM NOT AFRAID OF
HES SO SO HAPPY OMGGG
BABY BOYYYY IN HIS ELEMENT
SAD THO BC KIDS ARE TERMINALLY ILL
bestest party clownnnn
“I love this job” oh baby 🥺🥺
aaaaaaaaand now the betrayal from randall lmao fuck that dude
NO BB YOUR FOREHEAD NO SMASHY GLASSY
LMAO THE FUCK ERIKA???
dudes 35 not a kid
throwing greasy chips into a girl’s hair isn’t how to flirt my dude lmao you’re gross???
ew
EW EW EW WIGGLE YOUR CHIPS ELSEWHERE
ohhhh arthur, honey no omg breathe it’s okay
you wanna help but you dont know how
you sweet thing
send in the clowwwwwwwwwwwwwwns ~
IM CRYINGGGGG
“they couldnt carry a tune to save their lives”
JOEKR ITS NOT YOUR TIME YET GO AWAYYYY
lmao jokes stay you know im lost without you
HOW CAN YOUR HAIR LOOK SO GOOD AFTER BEING UNDER A WIG ALL DAY ?????
carnival with arthur’s hair is just 👌👌👌👌
WHERES HIS CARDDDDD
nooooooo omg baby no omg i wish i could take all those punches for you
i’d take it all in a heartbeat to save you
gritting his teeth not taking in anymore
YES BABY GET EEEEEEM
YES YES YES YES STAND UP FOR YOURSELF SO PROUD OF YOU
first 2 self defence, 3rd one unsure lmao but fuck it
no PUT THE GUN AWAY FROM YOUR FACE BABY ITS OKAY DONT FORGET YOUR BAG OR YOUR WIG ITS EVIDENCE
KILL THE 3RD COVER YOUR TRACKS
GOOD BOYYYYYY
carnival with blood on face = killing your insecurities
8 bullets from a 6 chamber????? mm-hm lmao i know @daincrediblegg wrote a thing on this once lmao bestest Egg is smart and i love her muchly 🥰🥰🥰🥰
run baby run, dont ever look backkk... (check yes juliet)
BATHROOM SCENE BATHROOM SCENE BATHROOM SCENE
fuck me against that dirty counter
joker’s waking uuuuuuuup....
that cello though unffff 👌
got me clenchinnnnn you fluidddd ~
and in his eyes, all the sadness of the world. those pleading eyes that both threaten and adore (phantom of the opera)
my brain is 90% song lyrics
hes so graceful and ethereal so full of pain and of love and of adventure and worth and need and yearning
my sweet boy
my wonderful angel
my fallen angel
T POSEEEEE
DAYDREAM KISSSSS
ugh push me against the wall and shove your hand down my panties and take whats yours
please and thanks
so confident
so smooth
so sure
unf
take me angel im all yours
and my name is carnival
SASSY BOYYYYY
I SAY BOY BUT YOURE A MAN LMAO
YESSSSSS TELL THEMMMMMMMM
LMAOOOOOO RANDALL SEEMS LEGIT CONFUSED PFFFT
TOUGH SHIIIIIIIT
LMAOOO PUNCH OUT
BUSTING A LUNNGGGGG
HE DOESNT KNOW HIS OWN STRENGTH
OR HIS OWN LIMITS
“DONT SMILE”
MOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOD
nothin worse than being told to smile when you really wanna bare your teeth and let rip
aka me every fuckin minute of my life
SHUSH ME SHUSH ME SHUSH ME
ILL CRY BUT DO IT
LMAOOOOO CHOKE ME WITH THOSE BICEPS
ILL GO OUT DOIN WHAT I LOVE
YOUUUUUUU
“gotham’s lost its way” ok trump
“thats not funny” SHUT UP PENNY YES IT IS
STOP SMOTHERING ARTHUR LET HIM BE FREE
“nobody ever saw me. even i didnt know if i really existed”
and
“you dont listen do you”
BOTH ARE MOODS
i feel them so hard
hes so sure of himself in this session
so angry and done and weary
“people are starting to notice” ALMOST A YEAR OF YOU BEING NOTICED
that green jumper omggg
good luck getting me out of it pfffft
“erika have you seen my - oh, there it is. never mind.”
want it back???? payment is kissessss
EW SEXIST COMEDIAN
arthur honey stop primping youre perfect <3 <3 <3
im so so proud of youuuuu
COLLARBONEEEEEES
OMG HE STUMBLES UP THE STEPS DARLINGGG
I wish i could hold your hand while youre on stage and comfort you while you deliver your jokes
just breathe, darling. it’s okay. i’m here, i promise. <3
every time you gag on your laughter my heart clenches
CRYINGGGGG
oh, my love, it’s okay. just breathe. dont fight it. dont fight yourself
you’re so good at imitating your ma pfffft
lmaoooo you’re so funny arthur
WOO BOI DONT FLASH YOUR PORN PAGES AT THE AUDIENCE
givin me ideas....
SMILE THOUGH YOUR HEART IS ACHING
SMILE EVEN THOUGH IT’S BREAKING
WHEN THERE ARE CLOUDS IN THE SKY
YOU’LL GET BY
SMILE THROUGH YOUR FEAR AND SORROW
SMILE
AND MAYBE TOMORROW
YOULL SEE THE SUN COME SHINING THROUGH
arthur is my sunshine
EXCUSE ME HEART EYES OMGGGG
ME AND ARTHUR HEART EYESING AT EACH OTHER PFFFFFT
gonna put people off their food doin that
thats life
arthur’s imitations and those soft curls and the dancing and the -
erika.exe has stopped working
“come on dance with me”
👀👀👀👀👀👀👀
i prefer the horizontal dance myself...
“big date”
“deliver the letter”
NARCISSISM
ARTHUR YOU DESERVE BETTERRRRRRRRRR
IS IT BAD HIS EYEBROWS TURN ME ON?? SO THICK AND DARK AND STRONG I -
and those eyes
ugh fuck meeee ~
yes thats an invitation
penny “needs care” but her handwriting is that neat???? yeah fuck off
sorry i dont buy it
she was grooming him i think into some kinda husband role and its fucking gross as fuck she was abusing him and he just wanted her gone
CUTE LIL NOSTRIL FLARES BC SAD AND ANGRY
OMG
his quiet anger scares me but i admire how he calmed down so fast
angry penguinnnnn
HE CARRIES HIS CLOWN NOSE AROUND IN HIS POCKET
CUUUUUUUTE
the similar clothing colours of arthur and bruce is v def intentional
in another life, arthur....
i’m so sorry darling you deserved and deserve so much better
legit one small change in anything coulda prevented 80% of this film
your magic tricks are gorgeous ~
you’re so funny and soothing and comforting and so good with kids
you are the best party clown
I GASPED AT THE FLOWERS
like my server nameee ~
“hi” that soft noise 🥺
arthur’s hands on those bars omg 🥵🥵🥵
okay i’ll admit i still dont get the whole arthur/thomas thing lmao is he his dad???? ive seen this film 10000000 x and i still can’t decide.
i wanna say he is but like ??? idk ??
it’s tragic either way omg arthur’s wasted in gotham
ruuuun arthur run run runnnnnnnn
the bg music isss 👌👌👌👌
arthur accidentally caused penny’s stroke bc med w/drawal but all that abuse, like ????? i get why he kept her sedated lmao i’d want her knocked out or smthn too
7 meds between the two of them, probably.... that might be why he wanted an increase???
you gotta lie, angel.
you’re in way over your head but lie
yeeees good boy!!
“a clown thing?“ lmaoooo tell them!!!
NO ITS EXIT ONLY
KINDA LIKE MY ASS LMAO NO ANAL FOR YOU
he just wants love and comfort and for someone to stay omg you sweet thing
you deserve the world and all the forehead kisses
TURN THE TV OFF
TURN IT OFF
TURN IT -
OH TOO LATE
arthurrrrr ~
its like a car crash lmao you know its coming but you cant stop looking
fuck off murrat
FUCK OFF SOME MORE
oooooooh thats a danger face....
lowkey want it between my thighs lmao use me to work out your frustrations i can take it
“kill the rich” lmao relatable
this film revealed to me that i have a flexible morality ksksksk im all for it though
sleepy bb ~
“we are all clowns” ALSO RELATABLE
🤡🤡🤡🤡🤡🤡🤡🤡🤡🤡
arthurs thriving in the crowd omg yes baby looks so happy
flashes of joker comin throughhh...
sneaky baby...
quick on his feet, light on his sense...
tread lightly on my ground, (abba; andante)
THE RED THEATRE SUIT OMG FORESHADOWWWW
he looks good in red
he looks good out of red too 👀👀
that is the smile of the world’s most precious angel omg babyyyy ~
he makes me smile omg hes my sunshine
my love my life
you saved my soul do you know that??? do you feel me and how much i love you? do you see me and these tears?
do you feel me like i feel you?
ohhhhh boy here we go asdfdgfhgjhk arthur going to meet his dad, only asking for love and instead he gets punched in the face
i mean i get it bc of what arthur did to bruce with the whole hands in the mouth thing but bruce is barely mentioned, like an afterthought?
thomas has a nasty temper i wouldnt want him for a dad
thomas legit only mentions bruce after he’s punched arthur its like his only thought is really protecting himself and his rep with the whole penny thing
his son comes after; legit as he’s walking away he mentions bruce so hes obvs not that concerned????
shitty dad award lmao
not that what arthur did is okay im not excusing his admittedly misguided and lowkey creepy actions but like ????
lmao prob gonna get hate for this ^^ like i did last time i mentioned it but i dont care im allowed an opinion
too tired to care rn anyways pfffft its storming so bad outside and my wifi has dipped idk if this’ll save
c’mon wifi, for me...
yes
arthur didnt have an attack til he got called crazy, its a trigger word for him 😭
oh baby its okay, deep breaths.
dont fight your laughter, that’ll make it worse
the way he bounces back from that punch though - you know how to take it, dont you, my love?
you sweet thing.
i wish i could get you out of that fridge omg baby those old ones lock - how did you get out ????
meds are wearing off now.....
darling say no to the show lmao you dont wanna go
*facepalm*
every time i watch this i hope it turns out different
it never does
arthur honey dont ask questions you dont want the answers to
that clerk was protecting you not letting you see the file
that clerk and gary were the only ones nice to you
but it wasnt enough
you needed love and support and help and guidance
and instead you got literal and metaphorical punches and no break
the hand puppet omgggg ~
i want him to play peekaboo with me when im sad/upset/make a hand puppet over my shoulder aszdxfcghvjbkn
ohhhhhh darling stop reading stop reading stop reading
put it down.
this entire scene is confusing and heartbreaking
ive seen this film 10000000 x and im still not sure i fully understand
his laughing is so much like sobbing here
omg moonshine its okay you can cry. let it all out.
newspaper clips in a real file???? mmmm - unprofessional or arthur’s manifestation of news??
🤔
we love pathetic fallacy in this house
i wanna get you in the shower and wash you down and feed you and wrap you in my warm embrace “i had a bad day”
my dark angel, it’s okay. i’m here. i love you and im staying with you no matter what
sophie was his last hope, his last chance to reconnect
again im not excusing it lmao but im saying i understand him
hes touching everything to experience it for the first time
he knows shes a daydream
hes self-aware but he needs his coping mechanisms
we all do it
not the breaking in, i mean the daydreaming
“i had a bad day” shatters my black, shrivelled heart 💔💔💔💔💔💔
ohhh, darling.
istg you’re the only person i ever fucking coo at
finger-guns = reconnecting = remember me see me
but i guess to sophie it came across as ominous/creepy??
poor arthur trying so hard to reconnect to people and he just cant do it he doesnt have the social know-how bc no one bothered to ever teach him
again im not saying its okay im just saying
lmao i hate how i always feel like i have to justify myself even before thats called into question pffft the internet is cruel and prev times ive voiced myself ive been sent rude messages and once bitten twice shy
the sword forgets but the tree remembers
hes sobbign and laughing and its gut-wrenching
that neighbour yelling “shut up” better catch these hands imma square up
have some compassion dickwad
you never know what someones going through so be kind
always always be kind
^^^ film takeaway right there
if looks could kill penny would be 6 feet under
OH WAIT LMAOOOO 😂😂😂😂😂😂
in killing her he sets himself free. but the trauma and the damage done to him leaves him open to more of the same bc hes so vulnerable
that heart-rate monitor went quiet so quickly did he tune it out????
OMG THE WAY HE REHEARSES FOR THE SHOW YOU SWEET MAN OMG YOU DESERVE THE WORLD
sir thats my seat lmao my throne of red
“yeah? all of you? okay” 🤡🤡🤡
us lining up to fuck him into next week 😂
THATS LIFEEEEE ~
the fuck kinda hair dye you usin’???
CHOKE ME W THOSE BICEPS
DANCIN TOGETHER IN THE BATHROOM
THOSE HIPS DONT LIEEEEE 👀👀
scissors = pre-med murder but triggered by “my boy” - term used by abusers.
poor angel’s triggered by lots of things, i think. theres no telling what triggers his violence and thats what makes him dangerous
could be anything and theres also no telling what his “you wronged me” scale is so ???
he’s like a kicked dog... lashes out when hes had so much and wont/cant take anymore
“COMING” yeaaaaah i bet....👀
“i stopped taking my medication and i feel a lot better now” GET OUT GET OUT THATS A RED FLAG OUUUUUUUUUUT YOU GO
OOOOOH JOKER’S LAUGH IS OUT - HES MOCKING YOUUUU AND YOU DONT EVEN KNOW IT BOY’S SMARTICLES
this is why arthurs so dangerous. he looks lithe and weak and fragile but he takes down a man twice his size with scissors in one hit
do not underestimate him it’ll be the last thing you ever do
I WANNA LICK THE BLOOD OFF HIS FACE
BRITISH ACCENT ON POINT
LMAO he’d so mock me for mine 😂
“you were the only one who was ever really nice to me” a moral codeeee; flexible morality like meeee ~
okay but he so made gary jump bc he knew gary was too scared to move otherwise
loooooving the gallows humour with the door lock PFFFT
gotham slept on arthur dude’s hilarious
OH OMH OMG OMGOMOMGOMGOMGOMGOKMG JOKER JOKERJOKERJOKERJOKERJOKERJOKERJOKER
!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
MY LOVE MY LIFE MY CLOWN MY HUSBAND OMGOMGOMGOMGOMGOMGOMGOMGOMGOMGOMGOMG
IM CRYINGGGGGGGG
JOKERRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR
JOKERJOKERJOKERJOKERJOKERJOKER
I CANT BREATHE FUCK OMFFFFF LOOK AT HIIIIIIM
LOOOOOOOOOK LOOK LOOK ASZDXFCGVHJBKLKJHGFDSZDXFGHJHKJLKJHGFD
✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨😍😍😍😍😍😍😍😍😍😍😍😍😍😍😍😍😍 😍😍😍😍😍😍😍😍😍😍😍😍😍😍😍😍😍 😍😍😍😍😍😍😍😍😍😍😍😍😍😍😍😍😍 😍😍😍😍😍😍😍😍😍😍😍😍😍😍😍😍😍 😍😍😍😍😍😍😍😍😍😍😍😍😍😍😍😍😍 😍😍😍😍😍😍😍😍😍😍😍😍😍😍😍😍😍 😍😍😍😍😍😍😍😍😍😍😍😍😍😍😍😍😍
MY LOVE MY LIFE MY JOOOOOOOOOOOOOOKER
JOKERJOKERJOKER
LMAO HE’D BE GIGGLING AT ME RIGHT NOW OMGGGG
lmao let randall rot there fuck hiiiiiiim (and not in the fun way)
i want Joker to touch my clit like he did the lift button 👀
ohhhhh look at you having fun on the stairrrs
happy babyyyy ~
dancing towards what you believe to be your death
so glad you changed your punchline at the last minute you didnt deserve to die
SWEET FLAWLESS ANGEL I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU
his “oh” when the cops come lmaooooo ~
he does that when you grind down hard on him...👀
so used to pain he gets up from being hit by a car and carries on 😔
run baby run...
hes so agile and so quick on his feet
thinks fast too
arthur for fuck’s sake dont you dare stop
you’re almost there, my love.
im so so proud of you
SASSY DANCING ANGELLLL
i love that smug smirk he has and that chuckle omg lmaooooo ~
i’d do anything to see you look at me with such pride
ooof you look so angry in the subway but i’d happily cup your face in my hands and smother you in kisses
your eyes red rimmed with tears. youve been sweating and crying ohhhh ~
my love omg you didnt want this, you didnt want the riots and you dont know how it spun so outta control and you didnt choose this
i so desperately want to be with you right now
“i dont believe in anything” THATS OKAY I DIDNT NEED MY HEART ANYWAY
I MEAN ITS ALREADY YOURS BUT YOURE STANDING ON IT OUCH
💔💔💔💔💔💔💔💔💔💔💔💔💔💔💔💔
“mm-hm” i love that little noise
“i love dr sally” BITCH YOU HAVE A WIFE AT HOMEEEE
“THATS WHAT YOU CALLED ME ON THE SHOW. A JOKER. DO YOU REMEMBER?” THATS SUCH A DANGEROUS LOOK ON HIS PERFECT FACE LMAO MURRAY HAD ONE CHANCE TO CHANGE HIS MIND AND APOLOGISE AND HE DIDNT EVEN KNOW IT LMAO
fuck ‘em, Joker.
You deserve better
GET
THAT
FUCKING
GUN
AWAY
FROM
YOUR
FACE
!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
all that pain in his eyes....
oh, darling. how did no one see you????
his backstage dancing got me 💦💦💦
hes so ethereal and mysterious, so free yet so constrained, so beautiful and so himself
i love him i love him i love him i love him
smile playing as he comes out on stage lmao even now hes being told what to do and how to act
hes never free
spinny baby
you spin me right round...
he suits the stage so well
lmao woop sexual assault (kissing dr sally without consent) isnt a good move Joker but damn what a first kiss...
never thought i’d be jealous of an elderly woman but here we are 🤡
he looks so good under the lights omg so crisp....
wanna mess and smear it uuuuup
~
you’re all being mocked and none of you fucking know it lmao get wrecked
memory problems bcof the notebook + “get it right” - he really cares
ohhhhhh baby come on change your punchline, come on....
okay but that drunk driver joke does make me giggle lmao it’s so out there and honestly my sense of humour is just as dark as his is
i just sHIVERED 🥵
“arthur” HE SAID CALL HIM JOKER DONT BE RUDE
ohhhhh i’m cryingggg 😭😭😭😭😭😭
i cant watch this without crying ohhhh all that pain, all that suffering and all that anger, confusion and betrayal. a mental breakdown on nat tv and no one sees him. how the fuck are you all so blind?????
“mur-rray” LMAO YOU FUCK MY NAME I FUCK YOURS
SAY IT JOKER IM SO SO PROUD OF YOUUU
hes speaking facts
“they couldnt carry a tune to save their lives” and that eye roll and groan yes we stan a dramatic CLOWN
this is fucking heartbreaking omg “i dont care about anything” but then he rants in the next minute - so unpredictable and dangerous and untamed but so so pretty in his pain so beautiful and so free
but hes not free... not really
“werewolf” as a verb omg only you could make that work
im so fucking proud of you
“youre awful murray” ooooooooh....
LMAO JOKER’S JOKE BLEW MURRAT’S MIND
hes crying and shaking and no one ??? sees him ???? how????
i legit dont understand how people just dont see him? people see what they wanna see but it’s right there???
he seems almost surprised by the fact he killed him
YES GRAB MY FACE LIKE YOU DID THE CAMERA PLEASE
IN THE WHITE ROOOOOOOOOM
UGH I LOVE THIS SONG SO FUCKING MUCH ITS SUCH A FEEL GOOD SONG
GOTHAM IS SO PRETTY WHEN ITS ON FIRE OMG ITS SO ALIVE
I LOVE THE ENERGY THIS SCENE GIVES OFF
ITS LIKE HOW JOKER HIMSELF MAKES ME FEEL
ALIVE
his little “hi” like they can hear him 🥺🥺🥺🥺
his laughter omggg sweet angelllllll ~
“i know. isn’t it beautiful?” YES IT IIIIIS
AND SO ARE YOU
OH NO OMG NO NO NOPEEEE
this scene always scares me even though i know hes okay pffffft
the birth of joker lmao
be careful with him please hes precious cargo
omggg i wanna sit on that car and wipe his blood away and help him to get home so i can patch him up
lmao im a scaredy cat til my loved ones are threatened then i scare up this fawn bites
i wanna help Joker to get help and support
i wanna love him through it all, the good and the bad
his slow dancing always gets me omg it’s arthur, still there, still suffering, still unseen and unloved
hes crying and hes in pain
blood smile - my inside is on the outside now and it still hurts
he didnt want any of this. he chose his name ubt not what came with it
my poor clown......
CRYINGGGGGG AGAIN
HIS GENUINE LAUGHTER SENDS ME OMG ITS SO PRETTY
i wanna make him laugh like that
it always makes me smile omg those cute lil hiccups 🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺
THATS LIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIFE
i love the audio muted during the scene he sings it omgg it’s so prettyyyy ~ i like to pretend hes singing to me sometimes asdfghjk
metaphorical or literal blood???
hes accepted who he is now.
hes free
dancing in the white light like an angel
i love him i love him i love him i love him i love him i love him i love him i love hiiiiiiiiiim ~ 🥰🥰🥰🥰🥰🥰🥰🥰💖💖💖💖💖💖💖💖
~ THE END ~
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Robin Story Part 3
(A/N) okayy so this got a little a tiny bit of Shameless season 1? I think it was were Monica comes back and make Fiona feel like shi but on the bright side robin is actually in this part so i can only do my best (am aware i said id do no angst for right now but i also didn't expect to get into a series so) Also v sorry cuz im really bad at capturing already made characters so Robin might not be herself but shes confident around Steve but i honestly dont think she would be at school especially around someone she liked.Warning:Homophobia!!!!!
Word count 1573 posted on 8-20-20
I take a deep breath before calling the last number I have for my parents. It rings about three times before I hear her voice. It should feel like a breath of fresh air but instead i get choked up. But i don't have that type of time so i swallow it and after her 3rd hello i say. “Mom, it urgent you and dad need to get here or you are gonna get in serious trouble and we might be taken. You know where we live the cops come on the 25th. See you before then.” I say and hang up. I didn't even let her talk who knows i may have been breaking up. She may not care. All we do now is pretend everything is okay. I decide to tell Michelle and we collectively decide to not tell Eric unless something is actually going to happen. So we go about our weekend like we do every week and on Monday we put on a false face. I walked into school straight to my locker where I saw Scarlet waiting. “Ugh, finally my weekend sucked, my mom made me go to a family reunion.” She grunted. I chuckled and opted out of telling her to make sure it didn't sound like I was trying out do her or something. We walked into first period and took our seats. And we went through all the classes normally until I got to 5th period chemistry. As soon as the bell rings our teacher tells us we are going to be put into groups of three for our lab. She lets us decide so I obviously choose Scarlet. “Maybe we should pick her she doesn't have a group.” She says pointing at Robin. “Okay, whatever.” I sputter out what am i supposed to say no please dont because if we do then i might turn into a blushing mess out myself. “Hey come be with us.” She calls out to her. “O-okay.” she mutters and walks over with her stuff. “I’m Scarlet. This is (Y/N). What's your name?” She chimed. “I’m Robin.” She says waving her hand. “What’d you do this weekend?” Scarlet asked, she is always really outgoing. “Not much i got a couple call backs to jobs but none of them really seem that good. what about you two?” She asked. “Nothing. I had to go to a family reunion which by the way who has a reunion before summer like our annual is in July but this year was May.” She finished her rant. “Not much just stayed home with my brother while my sister was out.” I answered. “Any job call you back?” She asked. “No i just applied at the one place, probably for the best.” We all went on talking as we did our project. She makes me super nervous, i keep on looking up at her just to see her face. Hoping that no one notices. But what i did notice is she has this blush she never has. The way she smiles at Scarlet almost makes me think she might like her. But that's impossible right I mean what's the odds of that? As we were cleaning up I heard her ask Scarlet. “Can i get your number? So we can like hang out outside of school?” Scarlet smiles and writes her name and number down on a piece of notebook paper. I was hoping she would ask for mine but she just went on like i didnt exist well no she talked to me and acknowledged me but not like she did Scarlet. When the bell rang I walked out with Scarlet and once we got half way towards her next class which i have to pass to get to mine she started chuckling. “Did you see her. She was practically drooling over me. It was hilarious.” She said still chuckling. “I didn’t notice.” I said which was kinda a lie. “One girl that was on her soccer team told me that Robin told her that she liked her. So it's not too far to think maybe. And then at the very end she asked for my number. I gave her Pizza Huts. That's so gross. Not to mention wrong.” She said making me feel like shit actual shit. “Well just in case it isn't true don't go around telling people. Don't want her to be ruined and it not be true.” I tried to reason. “Yeah, you are so right. Always my voice of reason. Bye, See you tomorrow.” She said going into her next class. God I hope I run into her before she calls. But will it help? I mean she’ll be embarrassed but will it make it worse if I tell her? Writing a note will obviously do no good because I have no balls. 6th and 7th period went by fast and just my luck i saw her headed to the band hall no doubt. “Hey Robin, I know I don’t know you like that and Scarlet will probably hate me for this. But when you asked for her number she gave you a fake one i'm so sorry.” I said then walked away really fast. When I got home there was a car in the driveway so I got off my bike and made sure Eric did too and we walked in the house, him behind me. Michelle was waiting by the door. She gave me a look saying it's them. I turned around. “Hey, remember how you said you missed momma and daddy? Well they are here but i don't know how long they are going to stay okay bud.” I told him before I opened the door he nodded but had a huge smile on his face that told me that he only heard his parents are home. Who can blame him. We walked in and mom shrieked “You are home! (Y/N) you have a call. Michelle you get more beautiful every time I see you. And my boy my baby!” I walked to the phone and rolled my eyes. She always does that always seem excited to see them but never me. I think she blames me because i was her first im what catapulted her into feeling bad for not being home. I put the phone up to my ear. “Hello?” I said. “Really you warned her are stupid? Or worse a F*****?” Scarlet shouted at me. “No, I just felt bad she didn’t deserve that even if she is you know.” I said. “Yes she does because it is an abomination. Its wrong and how dare she try to get my number?” She growled. “I disagree. Even if it is an abomination you are supposed to love everyone and being hateful because of one thing is also such.” I argued. “Oh my god, you are ruined. You have a crush on her! Have you ever had a crush on me. No dont answer and in fact dont ever talk to me again l*z*y.” She shouted, hanging up. Well this day couldnt get any better. “So as soon as this is over and you turn 18 you are out. You know that right?” My dad said. “Uh no? I didn’t can i get a reason?” I asked bewildered. “You called the cops on us and tried to get your siblings put into foster care did you seriously think we wouldn't know it was you. You have been ungrateful from the second you could understand things!” He shouted at me. “Do you seriously think i would do anything to put those kids out? Seriously. I raised them! You wanna kick me out fine but just remember who raised your kids. You realize I'm also your child right? You were supposed to love and protect me instead you left me all alone at 12 with kids to raise.” I calmly said, trying to remain calm. “Even if you didn’t, which I highly doubt, you still don't deserve the roof I give you, the food i pay for, or the clothes on your back which I so graciously allow you to have.” He said almost threateningly. “So what you put me out and then it’ll be Michelle whats gonna happen when you have no one to watch poor Eric?” I said mocking him a little. “When me and your mom leave again on the 1st we are taking Eric with us.” He informed. “No you can’t do….” I started. “No you cant tell me what to do with my son.” he interrupted. “Like hell i can't. He knows me! He trust me! He misses you two because you come with false promises and then it ruins him when you leave again! And you cant take him because hes going to a science camp. Which he got into for free all by himself by winning 2nd place in his science fair and if he cant go it will hurt him.” I stated. “Well then we will just pick him up after camp on July 1st like we were gonna do.” He said with a sickly sweet smile on his face. “2 things. No you wont and thats also not what you said.” I snarkily replied. “Jesus Christ get out i dont want to see your face until 11. Now Get!” He yelled. So I left I got on my bike and headed to the mall.
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Sunflower | Haechan
genre: college!au,relationship
warning: the d word mentioned(?)
word count:2.1k
requested by: @ hyuckysunflower
song: sunflower by rex orange country
Everybody meets their soulmates no matter when but eventually this happens. You had your luck to find yours in the second year of high school. You knew he was the one, you truly felt it.
/I want to know,Where I can go/
You knew Haechan since you were six or seven years old. He always somehow ended up playing with you on the playground and your houses are really close to each other you both were literally like siblings. You made your own courts pretending to be a kingdom where he was the king and you were his queen. He was the one who taught you how to ride your bike and the one who would buy you an ice popsicle in the hot summer days. You loved each other back then and you still loved each other but this love grew stronger with the years and eventually became a real love with a strong bond. You remember how nervous he was when he first asked you on a date and then your first shared kiss only a month later when he took you to the rooftop of his house and told you he loved you.
/So won't you stay for a moment,So I can say/
Now two years later ,happier than ever you guys are planning your future and everything seems perfect. You and him will attend the local university then after you both graduate you will spend a year of travelling around the world and when you came back he would propose to you and the little cozy wedding you both dreamt for will be held in the back of Haechan’s house since it was bigger than yours and after that you both will find jobs and a small family house and eventually have kids and live happily,
/Cause right now you know that nothing here's new,And I'm obsessed with you/
But not everything may not happen the way you guys want it.
You were accepted in the local college and so was Haechan. Some days before the official day for applying the documents for the college ,Haechan received an interesting email. Since the local college wasn’t the only school you applied for ,knowing that you don’t really need something else you picked some schools near the town Haechan also but there was one school he secretly applied for thinking it was impossible to choose him because it was a college for music and art and beside the grades they wanted a photo of painting or a video of singing or playing an instrument. You knew how much your boyfriend loved singing and music but you didn’t know much he wanted to study there but he didn’t mind giving up his dreams for you.
So when Haechan opened the email that said he was accepted in the music college he was on cloud nine.
‘’oh my god’’ he whispered to himself. He knew how hard is entering a school like this and he had to reread the email more than 5 times until he was sure that what he sees was right.
Then it hit him like a sharp slap from the reality. What about you? What about the perfect plan of yours for the future? Will you hate him if he decides to go into the music college? And the worst will you two break up? All of the questions popped into his head and didn’t leave him alone for the whole night.
/ Then I fell to the ground/
In the morning he already knew that he didn’t want to miss the opportunity to study in his dream college but the guiltiness was eating him alive. How was he supposed to tell you? So he decided to make the dumbest decision in his life- to start slowly avoiding you so you could forget him easily. It hurt him so much to ignore all of your calls and all of your messages you sent because you were confused what was going on.
/ I don't wanna see you cry,you don't have to feel this emptiness/
He hated himself so much and he didn’t leave his house for the following day and lived as if he was in a cave until his bestfriend Mark came on the morning of the third day. He knocked on Haechan’s door and after a minute of waiting the door was slightly opened enough for Haechan to see if it was his girlfriend.
‘’Man, whats going on?’Y/n is going crazy, why don’t you pick up her calls or answer her texts?’’
‘’I cant’’ said the other boy not having enough courage to look at his friend’s eyes.
‘’What? What happened,dude?’’ Mark sat next to him on the bed.
‘’I got accepted at the college of music and arts’’ Haechan mumbled,still not looking up.
‘’Oh my God, that’s fantastic! Congrats,man!’’ Mark hugged his friend with a big smile.
‘’Yeah it’s nice but the college is 5 hours away and me and y/n were supposed to study here. How am I supposed to tell her that we have to break up because of me ?”
‘’Whoa,whoa ,man,hold up. Who says that you guys should break up? You love each other so much its getting annoying and beside that y/n is good enough to understand you, you know this ,right?
‘’Do you think she would hate me?”
‘’No,no way, maybe she would be a little upset but its okay but I really think she would support you.’’
“you think so?” haechan finally decided to look up.
“ i know it,just talk to her,ok?”
“yeah,i must talk to her” he whispred to himself.
Haechan thought of a different ways to tell you and it took him one more day of ignorirng you. He felt even mote guilty but he just wanted to show you how much he wanted to study there.So in the end he texted you.
“Hi,love.Sorry for being a dick just got something really important i want to tell you about and i just really needed time to think about it and i can tell you everything if you come tonight at my place and once again im so sorry, i love you”
He knew that you were mad by the way you answered.
“ok”
at least you answered.
/'Cause I don't wanna feel like I'm not me/
Haechan felt really bad for ignoring you so he prepared something special.He made a picnic with candles on the floor on his balcony.When the doorbell rang he was trying to calm himself because the guilt was choking him.When he opened the door he was greeted by the cold look on your face making his pain twice bigger in the spur of the moment.
“Hey” was the only thing he could mummble in this uncorfomtable moment.
“Hi” you whispered feelingless although a little piece of insecurity could be seen in your eyes.
/Sunflower still grows at night/
You followed him to his room, the whole air filled with tense silence and when he closed the door of his room he stopped finally meeting your eyes now realising that are filled with a pure sadness.
“What happened,baby? You dont love me anymore?” you whispered silently but enough for him to hear and enough for his heart to break.You let your tears quietly fall on your face and when your boyfriend saw this he immediately embrased you in his arms.
“No,baby, how could you think about this? I love you too much, i’d rather die instead of leaving you” he whispered his hand gently playing with your hair and the other holding you even tighter.
/You know you need to get yourself to sleep,And dream a dream of you and I/
You sob for a minute more and then you look up to him.
“Then what’s the matter? What happened?” you stared in your boyfriend’s dark endless eyes as if you would find the answer in them.Still holding onto each other he takes your hand and leades you to the balcony. You gasp at the beautiful sight of what he has prepared for you.
“This is the least thing I could do for you after everything” he said as if he just read what you were thinking.
You both sat on the blanket on the floor ,feeling the warm wave of the candles as if it was hugging you.
“So i guess i will finally have to tell you”
/I promise I'm the one for you/
You nodded singlnaling him you are ready to listen carefully. “You know how much I love music,right? And you know how we are supposed to go to the local college but 3 days ago i received an email which said that...” he paused for a second and took a deep breath “ i am accepted in the college for art and music” he looked at you,taking another deep breath “the one i told you about some months ago”.
You just stared at him.No reaction,no word came out of you and he took this as a sign to continue.
“ i know how it sounds but this is college where is really hard to get in and when i applied was something like a back-up plan because i didnt think they would choose someone like me but it looks that they have” he chuckled to himself not daring to look at your eyes that was burning holes through him. “ y/n i know we had a plan and ruining it wasnt something i was looking forward to at all but i hope you can understand what a chance this is for me. i love you so much and the thought of having you 5 hours away from me kills every single part of me and i-“
“i love you haechan” you intereppted him.” i love you so much and i know how much music means for you and i cant tell how much proud i am from you because i do how hard is getting into a colleges like this one and-”
/Just let me hold you in these arms tonight/
its your turn to pause.
“ i wont mind if you go there and study” haechan looked at you with widened eyes ready to pop off their place “ i know its gonna be hard and i know that i will not be able to see you everytime i want to but i guess that this could be a challenge for us, like we live near each other, we went to the middle and highschool together and having you apart could only either make our relationship stronger or either we will end up breaking up” you both looked at each other seriously “i think that we are not kids anymore and we have to act like grown up people” your boyfriend nodded, staring at the empty wall probably dived in the mess in his head “ look i love you way too much and i know that you love me too so the thing is that i dont want us to break up just because we are scared of how the things will turn out” you pause reaching for haechan’s hand and hold it tightly and he responds to your touch in the same way.
/And so she sat me down and told me that I didn't have to cry/
“i cant believe how smart you are,y/n, you may be proud of me but right now im prouder of you and i feel that the connection between us is stronger than some 5 hours” you both smile warmly at each other still holding hands.
although you couldnt explain how much happy and proud of your boyfriend you were you felt a wave of sadness washing over you and it seemed that haechan saw that.
“baby, i know its gonna be hard and it probably wont be the perfect relationship but just think about all the trips we are going to have either you will come to see me or i will and in the dorm i will take as much as photos of you, of us i will take so everyone knows that im taken by the most beautiful and smart girl ever” he gave you a quick kiss on the cheek and you cuddled into him “and when i bring some of my new friends here ot when you come to see me im gonna show you off as if you are the only thing i possess”
/And then told me that she'll love me for as long as she's alive /
the huge blush on your face and the sparkles in your eyes gave haechan a sign that everything is going to be alright, that there will be you and him in the future and because the love you had for each other was stronger than the distance you were about to have between you and he knew that he is the lucky one to find you and he was gonna keep you,no matter what.
/Sunflower still grows at night/
masterlist
#nct soft hours#nct dream#mark lee#jaehyun#nct soft edits#lee donghyuck#nct#na jaemin#lee jeno#nct 127#donghyuck#haechan soft hours#nct haechan#haechan smut#haehcan imagine#haechan scenarios#nct scenario#nct smut#nct imagine#nct soft blurbs#kpop scenarios#NCTU#nct dream imagines#nct dream scenario
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Midnight Snow
Hello, @avistella ! I’m your extremely late Secret Santa for the @kacchakosecretsanta event. I promised a Knight AU so here it is. There was so much I had planned to write, some I’ve hinted in the fic itself. but didn’t have the time. So after my exams are over, I really want to give you the rest of it. I wish the new year brings you calm times and happiness!! Hope you like it!
The title was suggested by Gab ( @silhouettart ) from the kacchako server. Thank you so much!!
Genre: Humor/Romance/Fluff
Pairing: Bakugou x Uraraka
Rating: G
Word Count: 2431
Summary: Quiet nights are rare for these Knights-in-training, especially when winter just decided to dress everything in white. A challenge is issued and declarations are made, but deep down Ochako only wanted to know if she had a future where Katsuki could be a part of.
The cheerful chime of the clock tower's bells reverberated all the way to the eastern bastion. Ochako huddled deeper into her fur coat and rose from her seat. The shift was over. Soon someone would come to relieve her from her duties. Lo and behold, like clockwork, Sir Gunhead's footsteps echoed on the staircase. His burly frame, combined with his armor, almost reached the support beams of the ceiling when he entered the room.
"Is everything alright?" he asked.
Ochako stood in alert. "Yes, sir! No trespassers or potential assassins scaled the walls. The crown can rest in peace tonight."
He chuckled, the sound ringing through his helmet. "Thank you for all your hard work, squire Uraraka. You're dismissed. Return to your chambers and get some rest."
Placing her fist on her chest, she bowed slightly. "I will."
"And watch your step on the wall."
The warning seemed a bit odd. Stray lonesome snowflakes had danced outside the narrow windows of the bastion for most of the shift. Ochako thanked him but it wasn't until she stepped outside that the storm was revealed in all of its glory. Snow covered the gabled roofs of the main building like a cozy blanket. Even the cobbled walkway in front of her had patches of white spread across its length.
Ochako hurried inside, bouncing around the thin layers of ice.
Winter had always been lukewarm at the southern village she called her hometown. On the off chance there was snow, it was sprinkled on the rooftops for a day at best before it would eventually melt. This was something new and fascinating, and she really wanted someone to share the experience with. Her options were limited though. Most of the squires and knights had returned home after the winter solstice. It was just a trip down the hill, after all.
Except…
Her gloved hand muffled her knocking a bit, but no other sound came from behind the door anyway. Ochako took a deep breath and rapped the wood again. His window still had a light on when she crossed the wall. A loud thud made her pause. The door was yanked open and Katsuki appeared wearing his boots and his nightshirt messily tucked inside his trousers. Red bleary eyes tried to focus on her form as he ran a hand through his disheveled hair. Ochako noticed it spiked in several more directions than usual.
"What do you want?" he grumbled.
Hearing the low rumble of his voice, Ochako willed her knees to stay straight. There was no time to lose her composure. She had to catch his attention as soon as possible.
"I challenge you!" she said with her most authoritative tone. "Meet me at the courtyard before the next bell. And please put something warm on."
Before Katsuki could voice any objections, Ochako dashed away. She had imagined their first conversation after the Yule celebration a lot differently. Still, a ploy like this had been her best bet to finally get something out of him. Katsuki's pride was legendary to the point he wouldn't back down from anything—except talking to her for the last two days. But the one thing Ochako had learned since she arrived in the Capital was that sometimes you have to play dirty to win.
The night had laid out its dark veil over the castle grounds, casting obscure shadows on the courtyard. Ochako had crouched inside a pocket of moonlight. Cold nipped on her exposed face; each breath flowing like a frozen river into her throat. Despite that, she continued the task at hand with a joyful tune.
Soft crunching footsteps approached her until another shadow joined hers on the ground.
"So what do you think?" she asked, waving at her creation with a smile.
Katsuki adjusted his scarf, his nose featuring the same tone of red. "That's the ugliest snowman I've ever seen."
"It's not that bad!"
Truth be told, the snowman's body sprouted solid from the ground like the nightmare tree of fairytales. Ochako had placed splinters from a nearby torch as hands too. The pebbles for eyes and mouth were the final touch to its angry demeanor.
"It looks ready to cut-throat anyone that gets near it," he said.
He sneaked a hand behind his back for his trusty knives, no doubt. As per usual, Katsuki came prepared for anything and everything. It was no brainer, considering Ochako had left her declaration kind of vague. The scabbard of his sword was missing though.
"It's just snow." She placed some straw on the snowman's head. "Look! It kinda looks like you now, don't you think?"
"You brought me outside for this?"
"Don't be rude. I didn't think you go to bed as soon as the sun sets."
Katsuki scoffed. "That's what normal people do."
"People that don't get the night shift you mean."
"I'm not going to ask again, Uraraka. What do you want?"
Ochako reached behind the snowman for the pre-prepared snowball stash. "To spend some time with you is all."
The snowball whistled in the air and crashed right onto Katsuki's face with a thump. He had managed to shut his eyes on time. But as snow trickled down like pieces of pie, Ochako could help it and burst out laughing. Still, she wasn't naïve. Grabbing more snowballs from the pile, she ran off.
"That's how you wanna go, huh?" Katsuki shouted. "Come back here you sneaky weasel! You're getting murdered tonight!"
What followed was the most intense snowball fight Ochako had experienced in the fifteen years of her life. Frozen projectiles whizzed from one side of the courtyard to the other like arrows. Most of the icicles hanging from nearby windowsills didn't survive the process. Katsuki had applied into this the same mentality he used in all of his fights—take no prisoners. His shots always went for the most vital body parts, namely the head and knees, with deadly accuracy.
On the other hand, Ochako didn't manage to land another shot again. At some point, she even began to wonder if that first one had been a fluke. The thought of Katsuki letting anyone hit him on his own volition was ridiculous at best. But she managed to get her revenge the moment Katsuki lost her from his sight. He stood in front of the portico-lined outer hallway, scanning his surroundings. No doubt wondering where she had disappeared to. Ochako stifled a snicker as she scouted around the nearest supporting column. With deadly precision, she pulled at his scarf and sent a handful of snow down his back. Katsuki's screech was priceless. Jumping on the ground, she put a great distance between them.
"That's cheating!" he roared. "You were out of bounds."
"We didn't set any bounds or rules," she said. "Everything is fair in love and war!"
"Stop running and I'll show you how fair it is!"
They chased each other around for a while longer. The clock's ninth bell found them hunching over, exhausted and soaked from head to toe.
"I… win…" Katsuki's shoulders heaved as he panted, a milky cloud escaping his mouth with each breath.
"Yeah, keep telling yourself that." Ochako brushed off the snow caught up in her hair. "It might end up true."
"You have a death wish today or what?"
Her laugh echoed joyfully in the calmness of the night. "I'd prefer to live a bit longer, thank you," she said, pushing her head back.
The moon was so bright. It washed out the sky to the point no stars were visible anymore. Ochako opened her arms as if she was ready to take off with the slightest gust of wind. Instead, she dropped backward. She had been shin-deep into the snow but the ground turned out a lot closer. Her shoulders hit on it at the same time her head did. The impact rattled her brain; pain rippling from the back to the front in waves. Because of the monotone tune in her ears, she didn't hear Katsuki approaching this time.
He leaned over her with a pinch of concern on his face. "What do you think you're doing?"
Ochako tested her limbs by moving them up and down, tracing shapes on the snow. "I'm a starfish."
"You're an idiot that will get sick. Get up." He offered his hand.
Grabbing him by the elbow in the regular Knight-greeting way, she returned back on her feet. As he was letting go though, Katsuki stopped at her wrist and observed her gloved hand from all angles.
"Do you feel anything?"
She freed her hand, cradling it close to her chest. Her fingers had become numb at this point and it hurt to curl them. "I'm fine. Why're you asking?"
"These are simple leather gloves," he said deadpan. "Good for show but not for this kind of weather."
Ochako had always been blunt about her intentions for enlisting. It surprised her when her fellow squires showed nothing but unconditional support for this decision. However, at this moment, it felt like something which shouldn't be meddled with. That didn't stop her from spilling her guts anyway.
"I sent most of my salary to my parents so by the time it got cold, I didn't have much to spend. The shoemaker in town gave me some leather at a good price so I made them myself. It's not that big of a deal."
"Give me your hands," he said.
"Eh?"
"You have to take care of them or you won't hold a sword again in your life. Just give them, okay?"
Instead of grabbing them, he waited patiently for her initiative. She offered them—not without some reservation though. His palms enveloped her own like they were meant to fit perfectly there. The same way they had fit on her waist during Yule. Ochako couldn't forget that night. The music and the crowd had faded while they slow-danced like there was no one else in the room.
After all these months of training together, Ochako thought she understood him better. Her first impression of him—aloof and courteous—changed very quickly when Katsuki revealed his brash personality. His snarky comments had only sharpened her blade and resolve to prove him wrong. Although their first fight during training had resulted in Ochako's loss, something changed again. Not in her though. Maybe she had been amazed by his splendid technique but she still didn't like him as a person. Until he showed up during her private practice and backhandedly admitted how close she had been into beating him. It was the first of many such meetings. As time went by, Ochako even started reconsidering her opinion enough to give him another chance.
The thought of them together crossed Ochako's mind. With both being knights-in-training, their standing was equal. It wouldn't bother anyone if something more came to bloom. Even Katsuki, himself, mostly bragged about his abilities than his family's status. Word went around though, and her soul couldn't stop wondering if it was meant to be something temporary after all.
"What are you doing here?" she asked out of the blue.
He scoffed. "Saving your daft ass from frostbite."
She shook her head. "I mean, why become a knight? Your family is a branch of the Dragons, right? You already have servants to do your bidding and guards to protect you. So why would you go through this sort of training, willingly?"
Katsuki stared back with an unreadable expression for a couple heartbeats. "My folks aren't that important. They have an estate inside the wall and maybe a handful of servants at best." A cynical smile spread across his face. "When I'm done with my service, they want me to go back and run things. Can you imagine that?"
"No." She chuckled. "Okay, maybe a little. You already have the shouting orders part down."
"Maybe. But doing that while sitting on a porch with a mug of ale? Nah… The quiet life of a lord isn't for me. That much I know."
"Then what?"
"I'm going to become a King."
Katsuki stated this declaration in the same tone one might talk about the weather. Ochako searched in his features for a hint that he was pulling her leg. When she found none, her jaw dropped slack.
"Seriously?"
"Huh? Of course!"
"Do you even have a right to the throne?"
"No," he admitted. "That's why I'm going to get stronger than that bastard. When I beat him in combat, he won't have any other choice but give me the crown and the kingdom."
She couldn't help the giggles shaking her whole. "I can't believe I just had a snowball fight with our future ruler. Excuse me, your Highness. That. Was. Childish. Of. Me."
"What's so amusing? Think I can't make it?"
There were many words Ochako associated with him. Regal usually wasn't one of them. As the silver glow of the moon spilled over his form though, Katsuki radiated authority, power, and a wild drive to make his dream a reality. Under all that, there was warmth too. So far she had gotten only glimpses of it but Ochako was willing to let it consume her whole.
"I didn't say that." Then as an afterthought, she added. "When you become the King, will you let me serve as your Knight?" Her heart struggled to leap out of her chest, drowning every other sound around her. "I mean, you obviously won't need someone. Your strength will be clear as day to everyone but ya know. Kings have to deal with finances and lots of other things than the battlefield. After de-throwing the previous ruler, some might conspire against you too. So it might help to have trusty subjects look after your back."
The silence dropped on her shoulders like deadweight. Ochako had crossed every line possible. If anyone heard them talking, they'd be hanged for treason. Their families or more precisely her parents could be killed too. This was no laughing matter to talk so casually about.
"I…" Katsuki said. "I won't stop you if that's what you want."
She looked up from their joined hands, her cheeks so warm she didn't feel the cold anymore. "For real?"
He broke eye-contact, coughing in his scarf. "It's going to be a tournament anyway. I'll only accept the strongest people in my court," he said. "The competition will be tough."
"You think I can't make it?" she joked.
The moment he grinned was when Ochako received the answer she had been looking for all along. "Nah. I don't want to have to pretend I'm sorry for the other guys."
#kacchakosecretsanta18#kss18#kacchako#uraraka ochako#bakugou katsuki#bnha fic#bnha fanfiction#knights au#bnha#boku no hero academia#fanfiction#fanfic#wolfswriting#wolfsstuff#i started this so many times and the breakthrough came right before my first exam#go figure xdd#wish me luck!
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Close To You - Part 1[Eric/Devi]
Rated: M
Title and inspiration from Close To You by Maxi Priest
Summary: Devi and Eric’s story continues, but this time we see things from Eric’s eyes. It was her belief in him that sparked them finally coming together, but where did it really start for Eric? The life of a childhood sweetheart, conspiracies, and the fate of the city all hung over his head. He didn’t need to be wondering how to get close to the tiny amity with fire in her eyes and a mouth to match. He didn’t need to worry and wonder about how he could find a way to just be close to her.
@kenzieam @pathybo @jaihardy @every-jai @ericdauntless @beautifulramblingbrains @bookgirlthings @jojuarez26 @oddsnendsfanfics @offroadinjandals @singingpeople @iammarylastar @irasancti @captstefanbrandt @clublulu333 @fuckthatfeeling @tigpooh67 @ex-bookjunky @jughead-wuz-here wuz-here @badassbaker @beanzjellly @beltz2016 @meganbee15 @affabletimelady @scorpio2009 @gylisaa @geekybeyondallreason @violetsonthelam @kyloswarstars @emmysrandomthoughts @kgurew @beltzboys2015-blog @slytherin-princess-25273 @whatwouldbuffydo666 @jaiboomer11 @holamor @wealwayskeepfighting @original46 @blakefc @xtheserpentx @artisthedgehog
She had an attitude I can't explain
You never know if you’re in flame
Tying me up with elastic words
I'm on a countdown till I get hurt
Her blood was hot she burned so bright
A neon sign there in the night
It's hard to say if I went too far
My heart still bares the scar
I just want to be close to you
And do all the things you want me to
I just want to be close to you (I just want to be close to you, baby)
And show you the way I feel
[Close To You; Maxi Priest]
Part 1
“What’s wrong with her?” I ask for what feels like the hundredth time since I stepped foot into the shit hole that Dauntless calls a clinic.
Once again I watch the nurses flutter around the girl on the bed, clucking like hens and completely ignoring me.
I run a hand through my hair and restrain myself from punching something or someone in frustration but I can’t completely restrain my impatience at being ignored.
That’s not something I’m willing to stand for, initiate status or not.
“Will someone tell me what the fuck is wrong with her!” I move up to stand right in front of one of the nurses that have stepped away from the bed and loom over her.
She’s wearing blue scrubs, meaning she’s from Erudite and most likely the one person in this place that’s actually fully qualified to have the title I see on her little badge clipped to her uniform.
“Eric Coulter, right?” She eyes me like a hawk and I feel irritation coursing through me. For a second, I also wonder if she’s one of Jeanine’s plants in Dauntless. That’s dismissed when she gives a strained smile. “You look a bit like your brother. I work with him from time to time. He mentioned your coming here.”
I narrow my eyes, not returning her smile and look past her to the girl still laying on the bed, motioning with my hand in her direction. “What’s her status?”
Candice, the name indicated on her badge, bristles at being ignored but answers me through thinned lips. “I have to call someone in to evaluate her, but we are drawing blood for tests and monitoring her until then.”
I look back at her and hesitate, wondering why the hell I’m getting involved and why I didn’t just leave the Amity girl in her dorm bed for someone else to deal with.
“You said you work with, Dr. Coulter?” I asked with appraising eyes, watching her closely.
“I do.”
“Then you won’t mind working with him again now, will you?”
I have no real power here in Dauntless. Not yet anyway. If I was making this same order to someone wearing black, I’m sure I would be sent away with a sharp reprimand no matter how intimidating I know I can be.
But Candice is Erudite and I have power there. My name is known. If Candice is a plant of Jeanine’s she’ll do as I say but report it back to her. If she isn’t, she’ll still do as I say.
Because, as much as I might despise it and have wanted to leave all that shit behind, I rank higher than her in their hierarchy. No matter if I wear black now, to them, I will always have true ‘blue blood’ running through my veins.
As expected she gives me a curt nod before moving off hurriedly. The other nurse wearing black gives me a look before following, and then it’s just me and the girl on the bed.
My fists clench to the sides of my body as I scowl down at her.
I hate that she’s made me care enough to step in and use my name for something when I promised I would get leadership on my own, no matter how much Jeanine tried to throw her weight around.
I hate that I’m thinking about anything or anyone else besides what I came here to do and who I’m doing it for.
Jules.
The thought of her has tightness in my chest that’s growing tighter the longer I look at this stupid tiny girl laying in the bed.
She’s not Jules. There’s no doubt about that.
Jules is tall and graceful with a smile that can infect even the snootiest of Erudite.
Jules who prefers dresses and ridiculous hats. I never have been able to figure out how she gets them all, and most of them are so ridiculous in order to get a rise out of me.
Jules who has always been able to make me laugh even when I’m in the worst fucking mood and even my brother can’t stand to be around me.
Jules who can sweetly cut a person to pieces and still leave them wondering if she was complimenting them or telling them to fuck off.
Jules, the best person I have ever known and the one I really want to save.
When I look at the amity girl, that’s who I see.
Jules is who I should be with. I should be there helping her and holding her hand or trying to make her laugh, but I’m not and it pisses me off.
Because coming to Dauntless was more important than the girl I love.
“You better not die,” I mutter angrily while glaring at the girl on the bed.
The whispered angry words won’t reach the real target, who I’m really saying them to. But I realize with some surprise that I also do mean them for the girl laying on the bed in front of me.
I turn on my heel and rush out of the clinic as fast as I will allow myself to be seen rushing anywhere. I make it to the training room corridor where control bursts away from me and I sprint into the room looking for something, anything, to make the tightness in my chest go away.
*****************************************************************************************
My brother is not who I expected to see standing behind the door of the office I was summoned to just before dinner but I can’t say the dread I had been feeling gets any better when I do see him.
If anything, it actually gets worse.
He’s standing at the end of a long conference table, hunched over papers and a tablet as I close the door quietly behind me. His presence makes me nervous as hell and I feel slightly sick to my stomach.
All I can think is something’s happened with Jules.
Elijah looks up at the sound of the door clicking shut and his eyes narrow as they take me in. I know he’s doing a snap evaluation, trying to determine a million things in the space of seconds so I won’t get upset about him fussing over me.
Even with all the recent strain on our relationship, Elijah remains the person I know I can count on most to truly care about me and how I’m doing. Even when I do my damndest to drive him and his affection away.
“Jules?” I ask, stepping forward and forgoing all greetings.
Elijah straightens and comes forward as well. I watch him carefully.
I never fuss over him the way he always did over me, like a parent rather than a brother, but I have always tried to watch out for him too. I see the tiredness etched into the way he holds himself and his face. Eyes so similar to mine that have never been able to mask his emotions from showing the way I do.
He smiles tiredly at me and motions with his hands as he speaks. “Jules is doing fine. She told me to tell you that you better be ‘kicking ass and taking names’.” He chuckles and runs a hand through his hair. “She also says hello and that we miss you.”
I sag a little in relief and nod while clearing my throat that has become thick with emotion. “Tell her I say, same and you bet your ass I am.” He gives me a smile and nod at my response and motions to a chair to sit. I do while throwing out my next question. “So, why am I here?”
“Well, given that you broke protocol and summoned me here, I thought you might want to know what’s going on with the girl, Devanna, I believe is her name,”
“Devi,” I correct him gruffly then frown at myself for caring enough to make the correction. Eli doesn’t say anything, just lifts an eyebrow and looks at his paper before correcting his notes.
“Devi.” He says with a nod.
“So what’s wrong with her? It’s been a day since I took her to the clinic, so it isn’t her just having a cold or something simple like that.”
The first day she had been smiling with enerving energy that just seemed to radiate from her. I almost thought she was going to explode from it there on the train. Even when she was panting and huffing from the climb and run to get on.
As the day wore on the smile faded and she withdrew. Some of the other initiates seemed to thrive on putting her down for anything and everything. Her old faction, her height, her accent...anything really.
Mostly this was other girls. The guys just dismissed or ignored her. Like I have been trying to do.
It was clear after the first night that something was going on with her but no one knew what. I wrote her off by the time we were going to sleep that first night. I just didn’t see her making it. Here we are at the end of the week and I don’t see that changing. I’m pretty sure that’s what my brother is going to tell me, that she’s done.
Once again, I’m cursing myself for not just letting it go and risking myself as I did. Especially now that I know it had been for nothing, because she’s gone anyways.
Then I remember why I ignored all logic and reason. I remember how I felt that night and what prompted me to take her. How small she was in my arms as I carried her through halls, trying not to race along them but feeling a sense of urgency I didn’t really understand.
She was moaning, almost deliriously, but not responding to anyone that was yelling at her to shut up in the dorm that night.
I laid there not saying anything to the others. though I wanted to so badly. To tell them all to leave her the hell alone. Then she went silent and I waited for something, some other sign from her that she was going to be okay.
The others around us were going to sleep, no problem, but I couldn’t. Her silence was deafening to me. I could have left her there and had tried to talk myself into doing just that. Until something made me go check on her and before I even got close I could feel the heat coming off her.
She was whispering something, so faint I could barely hear her until I crouched down beside her. Her eyes opened and they were glazed, she winced away from me and whimpered pitifully but she kept muttering. I leaned in even further and she reached out to grip my arm, and I could finally hear the broken pleading in Spanish.
“Por favor, no ... por favor ... Tuve que irme, abuela. Tuve que ... por favor no me odies.”
I don’t know what it was about her words. Her pleading for her grandmother to not hate her. To understand she had to leave. They weren’t some big revelation, I’m sure all of us felt that to some degree. Worried we are leaving someone behind that will be hurt or hate us for the choice.
It wasn’t so much the words themselves but the way she said them. How strong two of them were, how firm and how much fire was in them as she whispered them out over and over again.
Had to.
As if her life was in jeopardy if she didn’t go. If she didn’t follow her heart.
That was something Jules would do. She followed her heart and come hell or high water she would see it through. No matter the risk.
Did Devi know how much she was putting her life at risk just by choosing Dauntless? Did she even think about how she was nothing like a Dauntless should be in all the physical ways that matter?
But I was thinking like an Erudite with those questions. A Dauntless, a true Dauntless, wouldn’t care about any of that. They would just know there was no other choice. Just like Devi did.
Something inside me broke open for her right then and she wedged herself into a spot that I have hardened to all but two people in my life. Now I don’t know how to make that go away. Tightness starts to creep up on me again, my chest itches and I reach up to rub the spot but jerk my hand back down and look at Eli.
“Some of the others are saying she has the plague or something.”
Asinine.
I know better, and from his look at me, he knows I know better. His lips quirk in amusement and he shakes his head.
“We both know better than that. She is sick but it isn’t terminal…” He pauses and winces before his eyes filled with pain and he lets out a shaky breath then continues while I eye him and carefully mask my own pain “...but it won’t be pleasant for her in the least.”
I nod slowly. “So what is it?”
“Her body is expelling poison and it’s anything but painless.”
“Poison?” I almost shout the question and interrupt him.
Eli holds a hand up to me, a calming motion. “Peace Serum, Eric. You’re aware that Amity regularly imbibes in it, but it seems that her case is extreme. We are talking about a lifetime of daily exposure at high levels. Her body doesn’t know how to function without it anymore.”
I scowl in disbelief wondering how that’s possible and who in their right minds would purposely do this to themselves. But he said a lifetime, so does that mean even when she was really young?
I wave that away mentally and with my hand as well. “So what does that mean? She can’t continue can she?”
Eli shrugs and sighs before dropping his pen and leaning back in his chair casually.
“That will be up to her ultimately, but she’s already waved away the normal method of treatment. I can’t say I blame her. That would have meant removal from training for at least a week if not more depending on how extreme the treatment needed to be. Leadership has already said if that was the case then she was out with no other options available. I was near when the nurse gave her the options and she automatically turned the treatment down, already guessing that it meant she wouldn’t be continuing treatment. She’s staying and will let it purge from her system as naturally as possible.”
“So she’s going to go through initiation while going in withdrawal?” I mutter and look at the table while trying to deny how much that disturbs me especially knowing what I do about how withdrawal patients are treated.
There aren’t many cases where someone gets addicted to substances like I know there was pre-war and the drugs that were common are all but nonexistent for us now. But there are cases where someone gets addicted on the ones we do have and there are even cases where someone synthesizes a substance and then gets hooked on it themselves.
When this happens, the person is isolated and then their system is purged with a cleansing drug. Tests are run to determine how their body is handling the purge and if anything is still off then they are treated appropriately. It can take weeks if not months to treat some of the severe cases my brother has told me about and that’s just from a biological standpoint. Even after he gets done with them they still have much more to look forward to psychologically.
I don’t know if I can spend another night watching her suffer like she has been the last few nights. Now knowing what I do, it’s just bound to get worse and I can’t fucking handle that. “Why give her the choice at all? Why not just send her back to Amity!”
I look up at him when he makes a grunt and I realize that I spoke that out loud. My frustration is coming through loud and clear.
He leans forward with a frown of disapproval on his face. “You know very well they’re going to send her straight to the factionless, not back to Amity. I know you might not care for…”
“I don’t!” I’m breathing hard and rubbing my chest while looking around wildly. “I can’t!”
Elijah’s beside me suddenly and I didn’t even realize he moved until I feel his hands guiding me until my head is between my legs and he is coaching me through my breathing.
When I feel like I’ve gotten ahold of myself, I take the glass of water he hands me and avoid looking at him as I drink it.
I feel like a fucking kid again. Like when I used to have these same kinds of episodes after repressing feelings for so long until they boiled out and over. Elijah always tells me that trying to go through life so emotionally cut off isn’t healthy and I know he’s headed towards another lecture of that kind.
“Are you going to gloat now and say I told you so?” I ask him sourly when I look at him again.
“Have I ever done that?” I can hear the hurt in his tone but don’t respond. If I do I’m just going to end up saying something else hurtful.
I always do.
For being a so-called fucking genius, according to my old faction, I’m useless when it comes to anything resembling social graces. I learned early on that honesty is not the best policy for me. Silence is.
“Eric,” He says softly and leans forward, his arms on his knees and head bowed, “It’s okay to care about people. To open yourself to caring for someone.”
I sneer at him as I scoff, unable to remain silent, hard as I might have tried. “Sure it is. ‘Cause that’s worked out so well for me in the past, hasn’t it, brother?”
He looks up and I see the pain radiating in his eyes. I know my anger and words are opening up a wound we’re still trying to heal between us. That’s kinda hard to do when I’ve refused to talk any more about it.
“I can’t apologize for the way we both feel, Eric and I won’t. You two love each deeply other and that’s never going to change. What you two have is still there and it will always be there. It’s also different then what she and I have, and that has always been the case too, but it doesn’t make what you two share any less powerful.”
I nod and look away, gripping the glass tightly between my hands as my jaw clenches together. “But that wasn’t enough for me to stay, was it? I love her so much I left her when she needed me most. It just proves what I’ve always thought.”
I shrug and look back at him, knowing his next question but also needing him to ask it. Needing to expel it from me just like the little amity is doing right now with her own poison. He’s right I need to talk about this shit. I haven’t been able to until now.
I need to get this all out of my system so I can go back to not feeling at all. Then maybe I can get rid of this new sensation for a girl that has no chance of sticking around.
“What’s that?” Eli prods me softly.
“That I’m not capable of loving anyone but myself. I don’t care who it hurts in the end, as long as I get what I want.”
Elijah rolls his chair closer to me, his blue eyes that are normally filled with warmth are burning with intensity.
“I want to listen to me and listen well. You are not our parents and you have never even come close to them. You could never allow yourself to be like them.”
I listen but I can’t believe the words. I’ve never been able to believe the words. No matter how many times my brother has tried to reassure me of this over the years since our parents all but abandoned us.
His features soften and he smiles at me. “Yeah, you have the habit of pushing all your feelings aside and acting like they don’t exist, but you can never get rid of them. Which is why things like earlier happen. Because, it’s never been that you don’t and can’t care or love, Eric. It’s that when you do, it’s all or nothing for you. Bone deep love is what Jules has always called it. You left, not because you don’t love Jules but because you know that nothing will ever take that love away from you. Not even being in another faction. You said those same words to me when you came to me that night and gave us your blessing. It was something I already knew, but it was also something you had to realize for yourself and one day you’re going to find someone that you love just as deeply but in the it’s meant to be.”
I jerk my head in a semblance of a nod, not bothering to reply how I’m feeling.
I’ve forgiven Eli for taking Jules from me, well, mostly forgiven him anyway. What he says is true, I did come to see that how I love her and how Eli does, they aren’t the same. It’s just that in my mind that doesn’t really matter.
It still hurt and that wasn’t something I cared to open myself to again. I loved her but it hadn’t been enough. End of story.
He pulls back and I breathe a little easier when I realize he’s dropping the subject. Eli leans back in his chair and clears his throat.
“How’s training going?”
“Fairly good, although there was a surprise when it came to finding out how many fears we all have.”
Eli frowns at me. “Did your amount change?”
I shake my head with a scowl and look off. “No, it’s still nine. Which should have been the lowest fucking number among the group.”
“I take it someone is lower?.”
“Yeah. Four of them. The asshole even changed his name to the number of his fears.” My scowl gets deeper when I think of the scrawny Abnegation that’s causing me more uncertainty than he should be. “He’s a concern. I’ve heard some leaders and trainers saying they’re impressed by him. Rankings haven’t been posted since training just got in full swing, but I think we’re neck and neck for first. I’m pretty sure I got him beat in physical, and I don’t foresee fights being a problem, but the scoring percentage for the other stages is a serious concern with his number of fears.”
Eli taps his chin thoughtfully. “That’s an extremely low number. What faction is he from?”
I know where my brother’s train of thought has gone and I can’t say I didn’t immediately think the same when I found out Tobias Eaton’s number of fears. In fact, I’ve been giving a lot of thought to it and what I can do to remove the threat it poses to me.
“Abnegation,” I remark dryly and see him wince.
“It’s the Eaton kid?”
“Yes.”
“Shit.” Eli curses with a grimace then looks at me worriedly. “I know what you’re thinking, Eric, but don’t do anything you’re going to have to live with the rest of your life. You know what they will do to him.”
I shoot up out of my chair and pace around the room. “It’s not like I have a choice here, Elijah. You know what’s expected of me. At some point, I’m going to be expected to have results for them.”
“That’s what they expect. But when have you ever done what those pricks in our faction expect of you?” Eli demands from me fiercely.
“You know why I even bothered to give their offer a second chance. Jules needs this, Elijah. This is how I save her. What does it matter if I turn over some fucking stiff that means nothing to me? Especially if it gets them off my back and me first?”
“Is that really how you want to get your position here? By taking out someone that might be stronger than you?”
I grit my teeth as out the cursed denial, and glare icily at him, giving him exactly the reaction he wants even though I know exactly what the hell he’s doing by throwing that out there.
I call it manipulation and he would say he’s being my own Jiminy fucking Cricket
“How do you think this is making Jules feel, knowing what they want in exchange for her life? Jules knows you as well as I do and I know in your mind you’re already justifying it, telling yourself that any exchange for her would be worth it but how far do you go down that road, Eric?”
The tightness starts again and I let out a growl, spinning away from him and towards a wall. I feel like punching someone and Eli is the only one in sight. “Don’t bring her name into this like some kind of weapon against me.”
I want to punch walls but know we’re already shouting and that will draw attention we can’t afford. We are risking so much already. I stop in the middle of carrying out my need to hit something in anger and just lean my hands against the wall and hang my head.
“I don’t have a lot of options here,” I whisper tiredly.
“No, not a lot, but you do have a few. Eric, we know they’re afraid of you taking the power they covet so much. There was a reason for this and maybe what we need to do is to show them why they were right in fearing you.”
I slowly turn towards him, my mind working double time as my eyes narrow. He waits patiently as I process this, his arms crossed over his chest.
“I’ll need help. Contacts that I know we can trust or that we can get leverage on to make sure they stay in line.”
“I’ve already started working on that. Jules too.”
I want to protest that, not wanting her involved but I know it would be pointless. They made me promise there would be no secrets and that I had to let them help in any way they could if I made this deal.
I gave a stiff nod and then looked at my watch. “I need to get going if I am going to get some dinner before lights out.”
He gives me a strained smile and nods but I see the hesitation. His internal debate and wondering if I will reject his show of affection or not. I step forward and put out a hand which he takes and grips tightly, his hand around my forearm while mine is around his. This is the form of a hug he came up with when I stopped wanting them years ago.
He smiles at me while we still hold firmly. Eli promises to make it for visiting day and that he should have contacts for me soon. We also share words of parting, mostly jokes that have been thrown around between the three of us of what I planned to do once I finally made it to Dauntless. They aren’t as carefree as they once were before our recent falling out, but it does hint that we can get there again given time.
When I go to leave he calls my name one last time and stands there looking serious and worried. “About the girl,”
“What about her?” I ask with a frown.
“I know it goes against what I was saying earlier about opening up and all,” He runs a hand through his hair with one hand and shoves the other in his pocket with the other. “But you need to stay away from her, for now.”
I let all expression fall away from my face and tilt my head. “Not that I see it being a problem for me at all, especially considering she isn’t going to last the week, but why? Does Jeanine know I called you in?”
He shakes his head while I can tell he is warring with wanting to admonish me about my callousness and wanting me to heed his warning for whatever reason. “No. Candice isn’t in Jeanine’s circle and wouldn’t want to be anyways. Something about a friend of hers that went missing or something. So Jeanine doesn’t know I was called in from her, but that doesn’t mean she might not find out from some other source. This girl, she might not actually mean anything to you, but Jeanine is crazy enough to grasp for anything that she can use to sink her claws in you even deeper.”
I feel bile rising up my throat at that but maintain my dead tone and a blank expression. “Like I said, it won’t be an issue.”
He responds with a resigned nod and I’m out of the door quickly after that making for the mess hall. Most of the other initiates had already grabbed food and headed for the dorm which was a relief since I didn’t want to have to deal with them. I ate quickly even though I wasn’t in a rush to get back to the dorm myself. Something about the activity around me and watching everyone go about their lives helped calm me.
Gave me the headspace to think and plan.
Elijah was right about handing the stiff over, it wasn’t something I wanted to do. I didn’t want to win my place here that way just like I didn’t want to have a bit of influence from Jeanine on the leaders to sway them either. In fact, I bluntly told her that was one of the conditions of my acceptance to work with her.
I also know without a shadow of a doubt that if turning number boy over saved Jules, even by way of securing my position, then I would do it and not even blink. If I had to carry that stain on me for the rest of my life I would for her.
The decisions, resolutions really, make me feel lighter. It eases some of the anxiousness I was feeling that I have a solid plan and course of action.
I even find myself talking to a few of the members at the table of the mess hall. I pick at the slice of cake one of the guys shoved at me and listen to them all bullshit with each other, but mostly I just observe things.
I see the stiff slipping from the mess hall, pulling in on himself to try and go unseen like he’s done from the first.
I watch the leaders as they look down at their noses from up on the balcony. Talking among themselves and hardly ever interacting with anyone else. But they’re watching, always watching, to make sure their bidding is being done even if it will lead the faction straight into war.
Max seems to be the one that I’ll have to be the most careful about. I can feel his eyes on zeroed in on me, watching and judging me. Even here when I’m eating dinner like everyone else.
I shift my focus and try to casually look to see if my suspicions are right when I see something out of the corner of my eye.
A small figure hunched over her plate at an empty table far in the back and cast in shadows it’s so out of the way. The tightness in my chest starts to creep back in and I jerk my eyes away, remembering my conversation with my brother.
I know I shouldn’t feel anything but seeing her is a relief. ‘Cause at least I know she’s alright.
So I’ll keep away, but I already know I won’t be able to stop myself from watching.
#fanfiction#divergent fanfiction#divergent au#eric coulter fanfiction#romance#smut#fluff#eric coulter#eric x oc#oc#jai courtney#diane guerrero#eric and devi are back#let's see how crazy eric is
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Returning Home: Noctis Lucis Caelum
Fandom: Final Fantasy XV
Warnings: None
Word Count: 717
Character: Noctis Lucis Caelum
Note: This is a little piece for @bleucommelhiver. Thank you for being such an amazing person who helped encourage me to start writing and loves angst as much as I do. Love you fashion queen.
Noctis x Female Reader: ‘‘You can’t just disappear off the face of this earth, make a reappearance for the holidays and think everything will be okay.‘‘
Insomnia was a sight to behold. Snow had blanketed the city, the cold chill forcing the residents to bundle up but it seemed as if nothing could stop the town’s holiday spirit. Bright lights shined, decorations and merriment were everywhere. Insomnia was bustling with people trying to finish their holiday shopping, heading to holiday activities or just spending time with their loved ones. It was a beautiful sight yet it reminded her of the hole torn in her heart.
This year would be the first holiday season after she lost her whole world, after she lost Noctis. Everyone told her it’d get easier with time, no one said they meant it’d get easier to live with the hole left behind. When she first lost him, she felt her life leave her body, she felt her blood run cold and her knees crashing from under her but at the same time she couldn’t feel anything else. She didn’t want to feel anything else. And that’s what she did, she just kept walking tall, keeping herself busy because if she stopped for long enough and realized that he was dead she didn’t know how long it would take her to put herself back together again.
She made sure however, to never let her friends see her breaking so as she looked back at herself in the mirror, her long black gown falling perfectly she admired her ability to keep her head held high and her eyes strong, to not allow herself to fall. Ignis asked her to accompany her to a holiday party and she couldn't say no to him. Turning around she surveyed the room, his stuff was where he left it, untouched with the exception of his clothing that she held close to he at night, trying to ignore the fact that it couldn’t make up for him. She quickly rushed out of the house and to the venue, ready to keep her guard up and put that fake smile on for everyone around her.
This was a mistake, flashbacks were coming and going. Of Noctis, of better times. From when they were just friends and she was helping Noctis sneak out of these events, from when they were celebrating their first holiday as a couple and their friends would conveniently help them avoid guests to have some time alone. Ignis did his best to keep her comfortable and even left the party early to drop her home when he noticed it was becoming to much.
So she doesn’t think twice when there’s a knock on her door, the boys and Iris would always stop by when they felt her slipping away. But she certainly wasn’t expecting this.
She just stands frozen when she opens the door. Noctis is standing on her front steps, a bit disarranged and beyond drained but he’s alive and staring straight at her.
“I thought you were dead.” She blurts, a little shell shocked. The missing king laughs and she nearly starts to sob right there. She mourned him, thought she lost the love of her life but he’s alive and she didn’t realize just how much she missed him.
“Can’t keep me away that easily babe.” He’s shoving his hands into his coat pocket, a smug smile beginning to form.
“You can’t just disappear off the face of this planet and reappear for the holidays and think everything will be ok.” She felt tears run down her face as her voice cracked and his heart broke for her.
“I know I’m sorry but I promise I will explain everything to you. Just let us be happy for the holidays. Please.” Noctis was pleading to her. She knew she should get some answers first, that she should step back and analyze this situation but all that matters right now is that he’s alive and he’s home.
She regained her footing and practically tackled him, his hands flying out of his coat to catch her before they both end up on the floor. He’s kissing her before they both can realize it and it’s everything she had missed and craved for and more.
“Fuck, I missed you so much.” He pulled away pressing kisses all over her face.
“Let’s go inside Noct.” And he’s nodding and pulling her into their home before she finished her sentence.
Tags: @creative-frequency @c-qcat @singlebecauseofthechocobros @owldearest @lucianhuntress @toastyfiction
#Noctis Lucis Caelum#ffxv#ffxv fanfiction#oneshot#fluff#holiday prompts#final fantasy xv#final fantasy imagine#final fantasy fanfiction#Final Fantasy#noctis x reader#ffxv noctis#noctis one shot
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This weeks notes
Mostly transcription this week i think, i tried my best for nott’s scene. as usual ignore the asterisks because theyre just notes to myself.
peace
Molly is Nervous (tm) abiut sticking around, or going to the gentleman
theres a fight in the evening nip, beau is fucking excited
its thedd (halfling from sewers) and lewis (one of the ones that had run from the research facility)
N: "I got three gold on Thedd"
M: Seems a bit late for a wager at this point
N: Just you and me!
M:.... fair. I'm in.
Thedd wins by standing on lewis' throat til he passes out holy shit
M: (drops coins into Nott's hand)
N, smug: Thank you :)
oh now Nott and Beau are fighting jesus christ.
C: "I cast Haste on Beauregard."
Laura: YOU PIECE OF SHIT **
J: Inflict Wounds (17 dmg)
((Fjord, changing his voice: "I GOT 5 GOLD ON THE HORNY ONE))
B: WHAT THE FUCK JESTER, Stunning Strike, (7dmg, jes fails con save (6), she is stunned, extra attack from haste, 6dmg)
J: (is stunned for this round, until the end of beaus turn)
B: Beaus the shit outta her ( 12dmg, 6dmg)
((MOLLY blinds her))
B: still goin, but misses 2 of em, hits on the third (12dmg)
J: (goes down)
caleb: goes for the low five, and Beau just.... ignores him unintentionally bless.
Frumpkin is sent to lick the blood off of jesters face, Beau cleans her up <33
They are called to the gentleman's side
offered a forward of 500gp and a pot of 4500g to travel to Shady Creek Run, the criminals town, and free and bring back Ophelia... something, who corresponds often with the gentleman
the tldr of the second (250 adv,
1750 pot) is that the swamps are dangerous for the gentlemans safehouse which has gone dark.
theyre promised resources for missions from the gentleman
Jester: "IS HE MOIST"(re the gentleman)
they take on both, starting with the swamps. The Gentleman advises they travel the 70 miles above ground.
Fjord is so fuckin smooth talky wtf.
they get greater heling potion(s)?? + cure disease?
Caleb's gettin some ink + paper, but its not good for spells 8(
Nott keeps making water puns. im counting 4. and a hankie.
Jester wand of smiles Kutha again, poor kutha 8(
Caleb + beau ( + assumedly nott) go to pumat's
have they paid their inn tab??
Cay buys incense for rituals, probably find familiar lbh. he also gets his magical ink+parchment.
Beau is interested in the bracers of defence. Theyre like 1200gp tho arent they???
B: how much
PS: 1200 gold
B:HOLY SHIT PUMAT.
[snip]
B: HOLY SHIT PUMAT(S).
C: (tells beau he cast haste)
B: YOU SLIP SOMETHIN IN MY DRINK CALEB??? WHAT THE FUCK MAN
they have 6 horses, 2 pulling, 6 solo. Jes is driving thr cart.
Caleb: (brings up the feywild)
Jester: oh the traveller has told me about that!!
Frumpkin is (one of) the first cats yasha has seen 8'O shes fuckin loving it **
lots of fucking soldiers heading to war. hundreds, if not thousands.
night falls as they reach the origin of the. road. they cant find a campground because tal rolled SHIT even with advantage.
Jester + Fjord take first watch. (13. Nothing)
Yasha + Beau on second watch. (14. Also Nothing.)
B: We should huddle together for warmth???
Y: Fr- Frumpkin is keeping me. very warm. are you cold??? do you want my, my cloak?
B: No, no my, my (jacket??? cant remember what she said) is fine, its htin, but its warm
Then they talk about Yasha ands this is the furthest shes ever been.
Y: "i like this stuff. Grass, and, things. you know."
B: You appreciate grass?
B: What was your favourite part of xorhas?
Y: I... dont know if i HAD a favourite part
this was the CUTEST shit
third watch is
Nott + Molly (10, nothing happens)
taliesin trying a jester voice makes me the heart eyes emoji
goblins canonically steal children what THE FUCK. And EAT them.
But Nott, apparently, has not eaten a child.
"My clan, we STOLE from people. money and clothing and things. And when things got tough, we'd steal the people too."
Goblins dont do family.
"I do not have an urge to kill and eat children"
"i have cravings for... rats... cats-"
(Caleb snaps) Frumpkin goes back to the feywild
Yasha: =(
taliesin taking watch after rolling shit cmon. he gets 16.
Noon, broken cloud cover, a tiny distant curl of smoke. oh not again. its a mile away tho so like
the smoke is coming from a small shack.
"For you, Fjord, I will make Frumpkin a bird."
He doesn't though but its the sentiment.
Yasha gets shoulder frumpkin back!
The shack door opens to "an elderly fullblood orc" with hair and beard and all that shit.
for 1 (one) gp a month, you TOO can bother a whole old man orc.
Jesus christ he had a battleaxe. puts it down, invites yasha and molly in.
THIS IS SO UNNECESSARY
Molly buys hide armor + 2lb of meat for 16gp.
M: Perception check 10.
Matt: "Okay."
There is sOMETHING SUS about this.
and theyre off again, i am glad for this. i do not like elderly orc man.
yasha and molly double up on that goof "we totally killed him, three times." its very good
M + Y: What kind of meat is this? (fuck their rolls) its meat! its good meat!
M+Y take first watch, its 12. Nothing happens.
Yasha collects some flowers to press awww.
N+C Second watch, they roll w advantage lmao. 22. something is going to happen.
"you hear the snapping of a twig. you see a shifting of shadow. a few things"
Cay casts mage armor
Two arrows for Caleb. con saving throw. probably poison. 10. its poison. he is poisoned. fucks frickin sake.
is it gnolls?? is it goblins??? hyenas??? furred barking things. wolves.
two ogres, a cluster of wolves, and goblin-like creatures
initiative order:
Beau: Nat20, 24
Goblins
Caleb: 18
Fjord, Molly: 16
Ogres
Nott: 15
Yasha, Jester: 6
Wolves
B: Jester, puppies!!
Yasha and Jester shrug off poison of those that hit them.
Caleb casts slow on one ogre.
unrelated liam is so good???
oh yeah eldritch blast gets two beams of eldritch blast at lv3
Molly radiants once scimitar and cuts RIGHT through one of em. misses the second.
Caleb hit with a javelin, 4-5 inches into his stomach, holding itself upright. Caleb keeps the spell going.
Nott pretends shes one of them and aims for Caleb, hits the book instead. and nails it.
Jester (traumatised): CALEB!!!
cure wounds 2nd level. but he is pretty fucked so its ok.
he heals to full its ok its ok.
Jester cares so much
Yasha pulls necrotic shroud! which as someone who cant watch TM, this is a reveal for me! :D
J: (to cale) Youre alive! How did-
C: (monotonous) haha! funny, joke.
Fjord explodes a goblin
Molly cuts one in half, vertically
Molly curses the ogre attacking beau
Nott shoots the ogre, and then the goblin next to her... but misses and is fucked
Yash gets the hdywtdt on one of the ogres
Beau @ necrotic shroud!yasha: you look... dope. You look FUCKIN HOT LETS GO.
cay has magic missile!
fjord gets the second hdywtdt w eldritch blast.
cay n molly go to retrieve stolen goods from goblin but apparently just Molly
Yasha necrotic shrouds when shes startled awake.
F: Can you fly?
Y: ...no
J: Have you tried?
Y:... yeah.
Yasha n Caleb have a conversation in celestial
C: No really, are you an angel?
Y: of sorts, i guess
[snip]
C: You will have to explain this now, or later. do you want to explain this now, or later?
Y: i- ill explain it, just, maybe we should clean up first!
i have no idea whats going on but i heard marisha say "bad dragon" and im gonna die
J: Nott, are you okay? Was it weird to fight other goblins?
N: it was... rewarding. I'm only sad that... one got away.
B: Nott, do you share the same hatred in yourself? [snip]
N: Do... do I hate myself? No. I'm... I'm cool.
F: You seem excited to hurt your own kind.
N: I know, I'm a goblin, for as long as I've been alive I haven't felt comfortable in, in there. I havent felt comfortable in my skin. It feels like I shouldnt be, i dont fit in with them. I feel, this feels WRONG, like I should be in a different body. The way they act, the way they are, it's not ME. They do horrible things to people, and they seem fine with it. I never felt the same with them. It's not that I don't like myself or anything, I think I'm okay, I just don't like how I feel when I see my hands, or my feet. They just feel wrong. I just want to be... different.
C: Was there anyone you were close to?
N: Not in my clan, but there was... someone. They tried me on different jobs but I was not a soldier, i was not a good cook, not good at sweing, or building, they stuck me with the torturer. I was the torturers assistant. there was a halfling village not far away and they captured someone from the village, they wanted me to kill him, but instead, I was kind to him. And he started talking, and my... fellow gobbies didn't like that, but they allowed it, because i was getting valuable information. [about halflings resources]
I became friends with him. He was nice.
J: What happened to him?
N: I hope he got away
J: Did you leave before him?
N: We left together
[snip
J: Did you love him?
N: .... I don't know.
The halfling taught her how to speak in halfling, taught her about alchemy, when he has taught her everything, the goblins said to kill him. And she didnt want to. so she got REAL drunk, and shot another goblin in the ass.
N: I hope he got away. We ran off in separate directions. I've been running ever since.
+1 to the quest log, find Nott's friend.
Beaus trying to be nice i love her.
C: I do not care. I know who you are now.
(<333)
B: I think we're all a little bit of island of misfits.
F: You showed a lot of bravery tonight
B: Nott, The brave.
J: Maybe there is a comma.
Y: Nott, I'm sorry we made fun of you eating children
N: I HAVE NOT EATEN CHILDREN
B: What got you locked up with this guy? (Caleb)
N: Being me. Stealing food?
C: You told me it was cherry wine.
N: OKAY IT WAS BOOZE.
it is now raining.
M: Well, I'm sleeping underneath the cart! if anyone wants to join me...
J: We wont all fit!
M: We'll snuggle. *
Molly + Jester are under the cart.
"i tasted a baby once. ONCE. they were handing around a bowl, I didn't know-" -N
Liam takes Sam's flask and takes a swig so i assume caleb does the same in canon
C: "Who am I to judge?"
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Ali & Carly
Ali: Have you been to the Drs yet?
Ali: I can come with if you want
Carly: what are you talking about?
Carly: why would I?
Ali: When was your last period?
Carly: idk
Carly: who cares
Ali: I think you're pregnant, Carly
Ali: whatever you plan to do, the sooner you get it handled the better
Carly: wtf no
Carly: im not
Ali: Have you done a test?
Ali: worth a check
Carly: i dont need to
Carly: id know if i was having a baby
Carly: you have it doesnt mean youre an expert k
Ali: Girl, you ain't seen 'I Didn't Know I Was Pregnant'?
Ali: its not all the drama and vomming its usually made out to be
Ali: not always
Carly: k
Carly: but youre wasting your time telling me
Carly: i dont need to know
Ali: Fair enough
Ali: but I don't mind
Ali: how have things been then?
Carly: good
Carly: what about you?
Ali: i'm glad
Ali: you know, bit stressful but getting into the swing of things with Edie
Ali: basically ready to go Singapore
Ali: just a few loose ends to sort
Carly: yea
Carly: she's good?
Ali: Yeah, pretty chill, bless her
Ali: how's Drew
Carly: he's him
Ali: Yeah
Ali: Could you tell him Meena would like to see him
Ali: he doesn't need to worry
Ali: not an ambush
Carly: k yea i will
Ali: Thanks Carly
Carly: he'll wanna see her
Carly: dont thank me
Ali: I know but thanks all the same
Ali: Its going to be weird leaving this place
Ali: I'll miss ya
Carly: no you won't
Carly: youll be having too much fun
Ali: I mean, its the plan but three kids and a full-time course
Ali: doesn't scream party party 😜
Ali: anyway, who there will let me art all over them? not a euphemism
Carly: too busy wiping baby butts and having breakdowns then
Carly: Caleb will
Carly: on both counts
Ali: Exactly, I'll be sobbing down the phone
Ali: like I never left 😂
Ali: and the jury's out there
Ali: 🤞 though
Carly: dont
Carly: unless you give me warning to zone out
Carly: he will
Carly: he loves you
Ali: duh, friend's prerogative
Ali: its best if you don't dole out the advice
Ali: not that that stops me but so I've heard
Ali: I know
Ali: Still hurt him
Ali: sometimes you can't come back from shit, so we'll see
Carly: sometimes you can
Ali: Of course
Ali: I never got to say sorry to you
Ali: that was shitty of me
Ali: things were hectic
Ali: but I really am
Carly: why
Carly: he wasnt mine
Ali: No but I knew how you felt about him
Ali: I could explain why it happened and the specific circumstances but I don't want to if you don't wanna hear it
Carly: no i didnt know
Carly: dont he wanted you for years
Carly: he got it out of his system
Ali: Okay, well I had my suspicions then
Ali: that was what it was for him
Ali: but not me
Carly: i know
Carly: you have a lot of supicious
Carly: thinking im knocked up dont make me laugh
Ali: I know the signs, Carly
Carly: i hope so
Carly: 3 kids
Ali: and you're showing them
Carly: im not
Carly: why are you trying to put the idea in my head
Carly: drew dont want your kid were not going there
Ali: because someone needs to
Ali: i don't care what drew wants
Ali: i'm telling you for you
Ali: so you can do what you want
Carly: well i do
Carly: i care what he wants
Carly: and i dont want any kids either
Ali: cool, that's totally fine but then you're on a time limit here
Ali: there's things you need to get sorted before you can't
Ali: this isn't an induction into the club, i don't need a yummy mummy friend
Ali: i care about you, i want you to do right by you on this
Carly: if you care then stop
Carly: seeing things that arent there
Carly: youre messing with my head here
Ali: i'm not trying to
Ali: do you wanna take the risk?
Ali: i'll get you a test
Ali: prove me wrong and tell me to fuck off
Ali: I WANNA be wrong too but I don't think I am so
Carly: dont
Carly: save your money for your kids
Carly: I'm not having one
Carly: i dont need to prove that or anything to you
Ali: Okay
Ali: that's all I've got to say
Ali: I won't speak on it again
Carly: good
Carly: i dont need it from you
Ali: I can imagine
Ali: but I didn't see anyone else letting you know
Ali: Had to, I'm not sorry for doing it but I am sorry its got to be me
Carly: its nobodys business
Carly: it's not even mine its not happening
Ali: Not what you do, no
Ali: but someone should be taking care of you
Ali: is Drew?
Carly: he loves me
Ali: doesn't answer the question
Carly: its not what you wanna hear you mean
Ali: Not gonna say I'm happy for you 'cos how could I?
Ali: But if you think I want Drew
Ali: then no
Carly: you should
Carly: you should want him
Ali: Well, I don't
Ali: I'm not saying he's the devil incarnate but I just don't
Ali: and you wouldn't want me to so?
Carly: i want him to be happy
Ali: We all want that for him
Ali: he doesn't feel it rn I know
Ali: but we do
Ali: You too, Carly
Carly: like i said im good
Ali: I hope so
Ali: don't you think you make Drew happy?
Carly: he wanted you and his kid you know that
Ali: No he didn't, doesn't
Ali: He's not seen her at all, its been a month
Ali: and you know he has no plans
Carly: im not telling tales on him
Carly: you know why he hasn't been around
Ali: Not asking you to
Ali: just bare in mind that he's got his side and I've got mine
Ali: Respect his but don't deny me mine, I know what happened and what was said to me
Carly: k
Ali: [Drewsif: I want nothing to do with it, that thing, fuck you both]
Ali: last I heard
Ali: I'm taking him at his word
Carly: he's in pieces
Carly: he doesnt want you and caleb pushing him out
Carly: her calling someone else dad while he pays up
Ali: We all are but we have to talk about it, to work it out
Ali: He's not being pushed out
Ali: its self-exile
Ali: and he isn't paying anything, don't expect him to, even though I'd be within my rights to ask
Ali: that ain't me
Ali: He's her Father, always will be but if he won't communicate with me, how can I make him step up?
Ali: I'm not about to make him, he has to want it, want her
Carly: he's scared
Ali: Understandable
Ali: He isn't the only one
Ali: he's allowed to be
Ali: but he isn't allowed to use her as a pawn, no
Carly: i know
Carly: i wish i could help
Ali: I know
Ali: you're a good person, Carly
Ali: I'm not trying to be a cunt, to anyone
Ali: but especially not you
Ali: I just wish everything could be sorted
Carly: Don't make laugh
Carly: I am not
Carly: everything'll get sorted he just needs to sort his head first
Ali: You are
Ali: Can't even help yourself, like 😘
Ali: I want him too
Ali: but if he could, keep us in the loop
Ali: because then I'll know what to say and do
Ali: I've got to think of Edie, first
Ali: but I don't hate Drew, and I want what's best for him
Ali: for all of us
Carly: can't help myself about load of shit
Carly: not that
Carly: give him a bit more time
Carly: not years just
Carly: she's so little
Ali: Nah
Ali: You've got many good deeds tallied to your name, trust
Ali: outweighs the rest
Ali: Okay
Ali: at the end of the day, we're always going to be here
Ali: not here here but
Ali: whenever he comes around, if he can prove he's worth it, he'll be given the chance
Ali: I'm not being unfair or keeping her from him
Carly: i know you wouldnt
Carly: i know what hes worth too
Ali: I take your word on it
Ali: but at the moment, that's all I got
Ali: but I'll be waiting on him, I promise, okay?
Carly: yea
Carly: thanks ali
Carly: youre still sweet
Ali: any time
Ali: you too girl
Carly: if i had a ma like you
Carly: the kids are lucky
Carly: and theyre gonna be good
Carly: youll see
Ali: get ready to plug your ears
Ali: too hormonal, you're gonna make me cry!
Ali: but i'm putting my life on it
Ali: its going to be good
Carly: its ok you can
Carly: have a sob
Carly: itll be kicking in for me when you get going
Ali: Thought you meant your hormones
Ali: Hope you stopped listening already, don't fight me 😉
Carly: I've killed them off
Carly: havent bleed regular since i started
Carly: it'll be all that good microwave nutrition
Ali: Gurl
Ali: Please, please PLEASE stop by the restaurant
Ali: I'll tell Gus and co, put it on my tab
Ali: If I could I'd be bringing you meals myself but I ain't gone be here
Ali: Promise bitch
Carly: itd be wasted on these tastebuds
Carly: dead too
Carly: youve got enough mouths to feed, bitch
Ali: then grub is grub so shut up and like it
Ali: need them nutrients
Ali: scrappy lil thing 😘
Carly: when she's a feeder. Thought you stopped fancying me years back
Ali: Oh no, I'm just out here biding time, poppin' out kids, 'til you come to your senses
Carly: i'll bring my imaginary kid when i roll up
Carly: you can name it
Ali: Ugh, my favourite bit!
Ali: know the way to my 💚 babe
Ali: I'll be pondering
Carly: boy or girl since you know everything
Ali: I'd have to run some tests
Ali: not bought from the chemists
Ali: lemme get the string and ring and be right there, like
Carly: ha
Carly: what do you do with that
Carly: tie me down
Ali: Literally, hog-tied and wifed up in one
Carly: casual weekday
Ali: you know it
Ali: how else did i end up the teen mum trash i am today
Carly: you arent
Carly: youre the best mum
Carly: if i was having any babies id want tips
Ali: Stop! 😭 When she's trying to break you #killabitchwithkindness
Ali: I'll set up the mummy blog now 😉 get in on it before i'm mega famous and getting those nappy brand deals
Carly: no need to link me
Carly: clueless and childless until death
Ali: hey, doesn't sound like the worst life to me
Ali: former bliss, latter...probs the same
Carly: when you going?
Carly: to singapore not the afterlife
Ali: just over a week
Ali: scary stuff, man
Carly: won't see you then
Carly: busy girl you are
Ali: I can make time
Ali: My Mother will be having an aneurysm but I'm pretty chill, ya know 😜
Carly: yea
Carly: thatd be good
Ali: Wicked, might have some kiddos in tow, at least the bab, can throw the others into Nursery mwahahaha
Ali: want me to bring the gun again, give you something to remember me by? 👌😋
Carly: aw
Carly: but the boys my fave
Carly: yea you should
Ali: when she wants you to bring a man
Ali: #baitedagain
Ali: you are his fave, why not, play dates are the chillest form of socialisation
Ali: fuck the club tbh
Ali: I will then
Ali: matching? be dem hoes?
Carly: ha
Carly: when hes that cute
Carly: aw
Carly: yea we have to
Carly: everyones thinking it
Ali: 🙌 let 'em think, make 'em talk
Carly: ill miss you
Ali: i'll miss you too
Ali: but i won't let ya, be on that phone 24/7
Ali: i've been made to swear on my life i'll be back for christmas, s'only a few months
Ali: we'll catch up then?
Carly: yea
Carly: theres your gift
Ali: yay, i'll bring you back some cool shit we don't have here no doubt
Carly: better drugs or worse
Carly: let me know
Carly: dont wanna fill your case with any old shit
Ali: with MY vagina? baggies fall right out
Ali: soz babe
Ali: mail order bride?
Ali: you know you wanna
Carly: ha
Carly: drew'd be happy
Carly: so yea should do
Ali: hm, i'll get him a keyring
Ali: 😉
Carly: he is always losing mine
Ali: See? I just KNOW things
Carly: bring him an address book too cant pretend he dont know where i am
Ali: He needs that alright
Ali: maybe I'll invent a microchip while I'm out there
Ali: hotwire his brain
Carly: yea
Carly: make me one too
Carly: different programming but
Ali: I will
Ali: get your requests in now
Carly: ill do my list
Ali: So many lists
Ali: my head is lists
Ali: as if they don't have socks there 🙄
Carly: use mine for storage
Carly: its emptied out
Ali: nah, might be nights out lights out
Ali: but you still in there
Ali: better be, not gotta make a cake but you know I'm coming so 💚
Carly: never made one but for you id give it a try
Carly: especially if you bring my fave boy
Ali: Obviously! Mum rule #1, bribe 'em with sugar, always
Ali: 😍 lets make fairy cakes #domesticgoddesses
Carly: dont think the caravan is kitted out for that
Carly: but yea
Ali: come over here man
Ali: there isn't a kitchen better stocked
Ali: can't even take the cred
Carly: serious? i can
Ali: Of course, hell yeah
Ali: ngl, save me getting out the pram of hell, double wide, you'd see me coming from a mile off 🙄😂
Carly: gonna borrow that when im feeling tired
Carly: ill fit
Ali: you probably would, its tempting
Ali: get Junie walking for me and there's a spot with your name on it
Carly: run into my arms sweet boy
Ali: [Sends Junior selfie]
Ali: The look of love, he's buzzin'
Carly: aw
Carly: trying to make me wish there is a kid in here
Carly: if its a boy like him
Ali: they'll work on you like that
Ali: sneaky adorable bastards
Carly: itd be a rio
Carly: i know
Ali: shh, she might hear you 😜
Ali: i can't hold her back, gurl, you'll be on your own
Carly: junie will protect me
Ali: Fair, he's her weak spot
Ali: Solid plan
Carly: whats edie gonna say
Carly: havent even seen her
Ali: she's not much of a talker
Ali: i'll whack my tit out if she gets aggro
Ali: that always works
Carly: on all the girls yea i know
Ali: you said it baby
Carly: war flashbacks happening
Carly: been on more tits than you
Ali: alright, don't rub it in
Ali: straight bitch
Carly: dont say rub
Carly: ive done my time
Ali: 😂 you say that but no one forced you
Ali: self-inflicted punishment still punishment, yeah?
Carly: yea yea
Ali: Well, I better go buy those vacuum pack things
Ali: WILD
Ali: need anything?
Carly: fun
Carly: no thanks
Carly: im set
Ali: coolio, catch you in a bit bitch 💋
Carly: love you bitch
Ali: always gon' love you
Ali: BITCH
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