#idk what this is but it might (see: probably will) turn into a longer fic or some kind of series | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

binsito · 8 months

Text

disk 2.0

part one is here!

pairing: bf!bang chan x fem reader x perv!changbin

word count: 3.0k (my longest fic this far AGhhh)

synopsis: changbin knows he should return what he wrongfully stole but he can't help but want to steal another one of chris' cds..

rating: mature, includes: unprotected sex, swearing, usage of the word "cockslut", "daddy", "babygirl", "good girl", "princess", "sweetie", mentions of masturbating, some fingering (f receiving), mentions of alcohol and consumption (they just crack open a cold one), little bit of oral (f & m receiving), breeding, chan is sharing his gf with changbin, filming/usage of a camera, voyeurism/exhibitionism dynamics, cuckolding lowkey??, degradation, humiliation, shame.. i think that's it but idk man they be fuckin!

put the cd back.

simple.

that's all changbin had to do.

put the cd back and act like nothing ever happened, like he didn't watch chris fuck the shit out of his girlfriend.

like he didn't see her puffy cunt ooze with his cum, like he didn't hear the pretty moans she let out for her "daddy", like he didn't see chris bring his heavy hand to her ass cheek, marking her so prettily as he pumped into her from behind with his thick cock.

chris would never know a thing, would never even notice the cd was gone in the first place, changbin was going to toss it back where he found it and take this little secret with him to the grave.

it seemed so easy.

it almost made changbin giggle how fucking effortless it was going to be.

absolutely fool-proof.

he was getting away with such a sneaky little deed, if it was this easy, why didn't he just take another? channie had so many.. he had probably forgotten about them anyways.. they were thrown in a box so carelessly, for god's sake. it wouldn't hurt to just take another..

he had to control the twitching in his cock as he walked into chris' apartment, disk buried in the pouch of his hoodie as he greeted his friend.

he welcomed him in so casually and changbin couldn't help but stiffen in his pants, tugging his hoodie down discreetly to hide his growing erection.

however, as he carried a conversation with his friend, he felt ashamed, guilt washing over him at all the dirty things he had thought about chris and his girlfriend. he knew he shouldn't take another cd, he should leave them as is and never pull that stunt again but he was far too gone, wasn't he?

if he was going to be a pervert, might as well commit to it, right? he already had his mind set on taking another one, had already imagined what could possibly be on another video and he would be incredibly disappointed if he backed out last minute like a wimp.

so as they started moving the last couple of boxes, changbin was bubbling with excitement knowing he would soon have the opportunity to nab another cd as soon as chris would turn away and give him a second alone.

a second was all he needed.

he wasn't going to be picky, any of the cds from chris' collection would make changbin a very, very happy man.

he would be content with whatever he could get, anything would do.

when chris tells him he's going to the bathroom real quick, changbin has to act like he's not fucking elated, like he almost didn't jump up and cheer.

he had to be cool.

had to be quick.

discreet.

sneaky.

he waited until chris was out of sight and quickly started looking for the box, however much to his dismay, it was no longer among the other boxes.

it was gone.

chris had probably packed it up already on his own, maybe it was in the truck, maybe he had given them over to his girlfriend?

changbin felt like he could collapse.

his excitement fizzling down to disappointment and frustration.

at least he could keep and rewatch the one he already had but he was just so greedy, he wanted to be nosey and see what else chris was hiding.

dammit. he thought angrily, he was so close, fingertips grazing his sweet little prize only to have it ripped from his hands.

he could cry.

he tried pretending like everything was alright once chris was back, helping him continue to load up the truck and carry all his music equipment safely.

a smile on his face as he chatted with chris while he was internally screaming, wishing chan had left the box out again like he previously had.

"bin, you should come over once i settle in to check out the new place yeah? i'll cook, i know you won't turn that down." chris giggles changbin smiled and nodded "of course man, i'd love to come over." "perfect, next friday yeah? it'll motivate me to actually unpack and get shit organized for a guest."

"sounds good, i'll be there."

but what changbin hadn't expected when he came over that friday was for chris to have company.

his pretty girlfriend sitting on the couch with a smile.

you greeted him and gestured for him to sit down. "welcome! how are you? i haven't seen you since that trip we all took over the summer."

changbin tried pushing down any thoughts he was having about you, how pretty you sound talking to him, how much prettier you would sound gagging on some cock.

his cock, preferably.

but you were chris' girlfriend so that would be off limits.

you kept a steady conversation with him as chris came back out from the kitchen, smiling and handing changbin a beer.

"how's the place? you like it? she helped me clean up nicely, got rid of all that dust and shit" he sat next to you, arm around you as he sipped his own beer.

"yeah the place looks great, chris. congrats." changbin smiled at his friend.

"hope you're hungry, we made some delicious pasta from scratch."

"we?" you spoke up and giggled

chan just laughed, knowing he tried to help but just made a mess so instead you had him wash dishes.

"dinner should be ready in about an hour. i prepared dessert too" you spoke up "oh thank you, i knew chan wasn't going to be the one fixing us a meal" changbin joked.

"he's getting better, no more burnt chicken. just needs to clean up after himself and be more careful"

chris just smiled and kissed your forehead softly, he loved you so much. you made him incredibly happy and he loved showing his affection towards you openly, especially around other people.

changbin was no exception.

"baby why don't we put on a movie or something while we wait?" "oh, sure!" you wiggled out of his grip and walked over to the tv, grabbing the remote to turn it on

"i think you'll like this movie bin, not sure if you've seen it yet" chris said

"what movie is it?" he asked but chris just smiled at him, letting the video buffer as you took your seat next to him again.

the video loaded and changbin's eyes widen as soon as he saw what was on the screen. beer almost spilling all over him as he watched you in pretty lingerie that had been carelessly ripped by chris, sprawled out for the camera to take in your wet folds, chris tracing them with a finger as he chuckled behind the camera.

"c-chris- i think- i don't think-" changbin didn't even know what to say, quickly covering his eyes with his one free hand. was chris doing this on purpose? was it an accident? he shouldn't feel turned on, pressing his legs together in hopes to tame the angry boner he had sprung.

"open your eyes binnie.. don't be shy now." chris spoke, his tone strong and a little condescending

"at least tell us if the cd you stole was good.. was it good, binnie? did you cum to it? you must've.. i saw you waiting for me to leave to take another. i hid the box before you came over though.. wanted to catch you. i knew i wasn't crazy when i saw one missing." he giggled so nonchalantly, the humiliation of being caught making changbin's cock pathetically rush with blood.

"channie told me what you did.. so cute.. come on binnie.. tell us how it felt?"

the video played in the background, sounds of your pretty moans filling the silence while changbin struggled to find words to speak.

"i-i'm sorry.." he said weakly "i-i really am i thought it was music b-but it wasn't.. i c-couldn't stop watching.. f-fuck it was just so hot.. i-i'm sorry-"

"don't be sorry, binnie.. you liked it right? hm?" you asked him, smile on your face that was making him squirm in his seat. his eyes shifting from you on the screen full of cock, to you in front of him, crawling into chris' lap. your eyes not leaving changbin's, his mouth salivating at the sight in front of him.

chris gripped a fistful of your ass as he kissed your neck. "you gonna put on a show for our guest babygirl?" chris mumbled into your skin, kneading your ass gently

"you're so sweet baby.. always so welcoming hm? good girl. daddy likes it when you're nice to his friends."

changbin felt his mouth go dry, hands shaking in his lap as he shamefully watched how chris sloppily made out with you in front of him. low grunts leaving his friend's pretty lips as you rubbed down on him.

"come closer binnie.. come look.." you beckoned him over, his feet moving faster than his brain could, quickly leaving behind the alcohol his friend had kindly offered him. he sat right next to the two of you, watching how chris expertly took your shirt off. he wondered how often you two had sex.. a lot right? given by the collection you two had curated.. chris seemed very knowledgeable and quick with his actions, almost as if it was muscle memory. like he trained himself to be able to handle you, like he trained you to be so good and perfect for his cock.

changbin's brain was so fuzzy, eyes scanning your body as chris discarded your clothes, before he knew it you were only in your panties. chris sucking eagerly on your tits while his hands played with the waistband of your underwear.

changbin was dying for a taste, wanted to touch how soft your skin was, wanted to give you goosebumps and tug on your hair and spank you until you cried out for him to stop.

chris had bent you over his lap, ass in changbin's direction so he could get a clear view. pulling your underwear aside so he could see your cunt on display. "see this, bin? she's always so fucking wet. she touched herself when i told her about what you did. came all over her own fingers.. heard her moan your name."

chris held your asscheeks open so changbin could see your pretty hole clenching around nothing "she's a bit of a cockslut.. but nothing i can't handle. look how easy she takes this.."

with that, he pressed two fingers in, your cunt sucking him in just how he knew it would. he pumped them a few times before bringing them out slowly, letting changbin see the slick coating his fingers

"here.. taste. it's the sweetest pussy you'll ever have." chris said as he held out his fingers for changbin to take.

all pride aside, changbin leaned in and took chris' fingers in his mouth, rolling his eyes back at the taste and humming. "good right? told ya so.. such a perfect cunt.." he emphasized his statement with a harsh spank. you whined as you felt chris pull you off his lap in order for him to get undressed. he threw his shirt off and pulled his pants along with his boxers down just enough for his cock to spring free.

"can you show binnie how you good you ride daddy's cock, babygirl?"

he didn't have to tell you twice, quickly clambering into his lap again as you lined him up with your aching hole. you pressed down inch by inch, feeling the nice stretch of his cock. changbin's cock was growing impatient, he needed to feel some type of relief even if it was just his fingers. he began tugging his pants down to fist his cock, whimpering at the feeling of finally getting some friction.

"you better not fucking cum, changbin." chris scolded

changbin quickly dropped his hand, not wanting to anger his friend and make him stop.

instead he focused on the pace you had set on chris' cock, how your tits bounced with every movement, the concentrated look on your face and the way you bit your lip whenever you hit a spot that felt so good. the way you dug your fingers into chris' shoulders, how he guided you with his rough hands, his curly hair beginning to stick to his forehead.

all that alone could make changbin cum untouched.

chris trailed a hand down to where you connected, rubbing your clit to help you build up an orgasm, his other hand reached for your hair as he tugged your head back, barring your neck for him to leave a love bite.

the room echoed with noises from the video that was still playing in the background alongside your sweet whimpers as chris worked you up.

all music to changbin's ears.

it was too much for you, having chris touch you and changbin watching you come apart, your orgasm ripping through you as you chanted chris' name.

you tried collecting yourself, calming your breathing as you pulled off chris' cock but your legs felt like jelly so he helped you and gently set you besides him.

he had stood up and opened up a drawer underneath the tv, pulling out his camera and setting it on the table in front of everyone. "hope you aren't camera shy, binnie." he teased

once chris had finally set up the camera exactly how he wanted, he decided it was finally time to let changbin have a turn. he was his guest after all and chris always made sure his guests were comfortable and taken care of in his home.

"how do you want me binnie? tell me, sweetie.. i wanna please you.." you purred

you'd be lying if you said you weren't excited to have him inside, his cock looked delicious.. thick and so hard.. poor thing must've been struggling, his cock throbbing for attention. chris could be such a meanie.

"c-can.. can i.. taste you? want you on my face.." he said shyly

you tugged him down on the couch, having him lay beneath you as you positioned yourself on his face, caging him in.

as soon as his eyes met your pretty cunt, he was gone.

all the shame and humiliation he once felt (even if it had turned him on so badly), had completely vanished.

he was hungry.

he held you open, licking up a long strip up your cunt before he began to suck on your clit.

he was making you shake, arms feeling so wobbly as you held on to his thighs to prevent yourself from toppling over.

"oh god channie.. he's so good with is tongue.." you whimpered, kicking your head back as you let out a whiny moan.

"i think he likes the dessert you prepared for him, princess." chris teased.

you leaned forward to take changbin's tip in your mouth, sucking just harsh enough for him to buck his hips up at the pressure.

chris grabbed the camera and brought it towards you, filming the way you began to bob your head on changbin's cock. he gripped you by the hair and tugged you off, spit connecting you the the tip of changbin's cock.

"you like being a slut with binnie? like having fun with two cocks?"

you could barely even answer as you felt changbin working you up to your second orgasm, chris gripped your hair tighter to make you focus.

"can't even fucking think straight.. so damn cock hungry.." he spat

"binnie, why don't you give her what she wants hm? why don't you you fuck her nice and dumb for me?"

he pulled away from your sopping cunt, giving you a few hasty licks before chan set down the camera, grabbing you and positioning you on your hands and knees over the arm rest.

"she's all yours, binnie. take good care of that cunt for me."

chris watched as changbin lined himself up, gripping on to your hips as he rubbed his tip against your folds.

your back arched when you felt him breech your hole, his thick cock easily pushing its way inside of you, pressing so deeply it kissed your sweet spot perfectly. you felt so fucking full of him already and you were glad he was going to put that fat cock of his to good use.

he had to concentrate hard to not bust right away, your cunt wrapping around his length so good, he thought he was seeing stars.

he set a steady pace, breathing heavily as he watched his cock sink in and out of you, a ring of cream forming against his base.

"fucking like bunnies.. so cute.." chan groaned as he stroked himself to the sight of his girlfriend being treated so nicely by changbin.

"s-shit.. chris.. where do you want me to cum? i-i think i might soon.." changbin whimpered

"keep it inside of her.'

changbin swore he was having another vivid wet dream.

inside?

chris wanted him to cum inside his girlfriend?

chris wanted him to fill her with his seed?

breed her and leave her stuffed full of him?

changbin closed his eyes tightly, it didn't matter how hard he tried to clear his head and focus, he was a weak, weak man.

"i'm close too, binnie.. touch me.. wanna cum with you.." you pleaded.

he took a shaky breath as he pressed his chest flush against your back, allowing him easier access to reach over and rub your clit.

his thrusts becoming sloppy as he bit into your shoulder to ground himself. he could feel you clenching on him, consistent moans leaving your lips as you got closer and closer to your peak.

it wasn't long before you turned into putty underneath him, cumming with his name on your tongue which was enough to make him shoot out as well. he kept still making sure every drop seeped into you and did not got to waste.

he kissed your shoulder gently before he carefully pulled out as to not spill on chris' couch.

"stay still babygirl.. daddy wants to fuck binnie's cum into you. make sure it stays in you real good, kay?"

this would not be the last time changbin would make a cameo in chris' homemade sex tapes.

unfortunately, it came at the expense of dinner being ruined that night due to negligence. blame it on changbin and his horny antics.

please refrain from reposting, modifying, translating, copying or stealing my work. - © binsito

#skz smut #stray kids smut #binsito #stray kids changbin #seo changbin #changbin smut #changbin stray kids #chan smut #bang chan x reader #bangchan x reader #skz bangchan #bang chan smut #bangchan smut #changbin x reader smut #changbin x reader #bangchan x reader smut

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mixtape-racha · 9 months

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YAYYYYYY 100 followersssss :) im so happy for youuuuu :)))))

okay, here is my request... hehe, im suchhh a sucker for hurt comfort and I loveeee fem 9th member au's. but like not smut or like fwb, just like a really juicy story y'know? I haven't been able to find any of those two categories combined tho, especially into like a longer fic, like it's always in the hundreds (I would love it if it was a little longer, no pressure tho :). literally, anything works, from some kinda mess up on stage to maybe you messing up a relationship w a member??? idk. I'm letting ur thoughts run wild here... THANK YOU AND CONGRATSSSS

(im sorry im really vague in requests lol)

YAYYYY THO IM LIKE REALLYYYY PROUD OF YOU<<<3333 LOV U BB KEEP DOING WHAT YOU DOOOO

thank you so much my lovely bae!! ilysm and i hope i did this request justice!! i kind of went off on a tangent and got carried away with the plot waaa <3

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sorry seems to be the hardest word

pairing: ot8 x fem!9th member!reader

warnings: angst, hurt comfort, reader snapping at the members, reader being physically unwell, fluff at the end

words: 2.29k

everything was going wrong today, and you truly meant every. fucking. thing.

somehow, you had managed to turn your alarm off the night before (probably because you fell asleep while on your phone, accidentally calling your mom in you sleep in the process), and none of the guys took the initiative to wake you up when they got up.

okay, sure, you couldn’t blame them entirely. you were a grown woman, and you could look after yourself. but weren’t you supposed to be a team? eight other people surrounding you, and none of them thought to check on you? especially when you were usually up and alert before they were? no, instead they were all out the door without even knocking to see if you were feeling okay. so much for being your brothers and best friends.

so god forbid, you were late this morning. you managed to turn up at the company for your vocal lessons only ten minute late, but it felt awful as you’d never been late before. you were so incredibly lucky to get the opportunity to debut with skz, especially joining the group later in their career and being the only girl. you wanted to do everything perfectly to show that you deserved to be where you were, and with the way today was shaping out you were so disappointed with yourself.

but then - it got worse. you, in your rush to leave the dorms, had forgotten your sheet music, leaving your vocal teacher to be short and snappy with you. yeah, you brought it up on your phone instead, but she was strict, and a firm believer in “good old-fashioned pen and paper over your silly little radio devices nowadays”. her attitude towards you for the remainder of your lesson affected you more than you liked to admit - excusing yourself to the bathroom to have a little cry before you headed to the studio.

for some reason, none of your schedules were properly coordinated today, leaving jisung to be the one in the studio with you - rather than chan, like usual - while you recorded your lines for the demos to be sent to the company later in the month, when you’d decide the songs for the new album you had upcoming later in the year.

jisung was always the nicest to you, especially when he could tell you were having a rough day - you were both very alike in that sense, very attentive towards each other as if you could tell what the other was feeling.

however, it seemed today that something had crawled up his ass and died. he was almost as snappy as your vocal teacher, and you were quite frankly sick of it. you kept messing up your lines; whether from the stress or the ache building in your throat (god you hoped you weren’t getting sick), you weren’t sure. but clearly, jisung wouldn’t stand for it.

“honestly, (y/n), you might as well just call it a day and come back to this with chan-hyung another day. i need to get on with other stuff.” he sighed, dismissively, as you bit back the tears fighting to escape your eyes. he wouldn’t even look at you, and your stomach was doing somersaults. was he really that mad? surely he could see how hard you were trying.

but instead of confronting him, you just grabbed your belongings and left after silently agreeing. no one answered your message on the group chat when you asked if anyone was down to get lunch together, even though you could see basically everyone had read it, so you retreated to the canteen alone before you had to go to practice with the boys.

as the ache in your throat spread to your joints, fatigue plaguing you, you trudged up to the practice room for rehearsals with the boys. you were learning a new dance - in fact, the already chosen title track for the new album, and deep down you were dreading it. it was more difficult than you had imagined, and definitely aimed more towards moves the boys could do compared to you. you loved the boys, but sometimes you felt like they forgot that men and women’s bodies worked differently.

surprisingly, you weren’t the last to arrive, squashing your fear of another thing going wrong.

but just as soon as practice began, your fear was reawakened. the ache in your joints was making the dance more difficult for you to execute, and you could feel the annoyance radiating off of minho’s body even if he wouldn’t admit it. you stumbled a few times, almost knocking into felix, who looked at you more frustrated than concerned.

“seriously, (n/n), what’s going on? it’s really not that hard. get your head in the game.”

you huffed, shaking out your limbs and telling minho to start the track again. maybe if you ignored your surroundings, ignored how you were feeling, then things would be easier. you could block out minho’s harsh criticisms - he was probably just tired. you could block out everything, knowing the boys were suffering just as much as you lately. but when the music stopped again, and everyone was talking at you, voice after voice lapping over each other you just couldn’t take it anymore.

“shut the fuck up! shut up, shut up, shut up! give me a fucking break, i’m trying my hardest!”

you honestly didn’t mean to snap, you were just so overwhelmed and couldn’t take anymore. when chan tried to put a comforting hand on your shoulder, you flung it off, all your annoyance and stress from the day building up at once.

“don’t fucking touch me. i don’t need your pity, i don’t need you to tell me that i don’t know how to do my job well enough. this is the fucking worst day of my life and you all keep making it worse!”

every fiber of your being was telling you to stop, to be reasonable, but it was like your mouth was making its own decisions. you couldn’t tell which member it was, but you were interrupting the gentle call of your name before you could even control it.

“and no, before any of you try to be funny, i’m not on my period,” you sneered, anger bubbling under your skin as you saw jisung look away sheepishly. “i’m just sick of feeling like i have to fight to prove i’m good enough, like i’m not one of you guys yet. we’re supposed to be a team, but all day i’ve been pushed to the side and treated like i don’t matter. i’m sick of it!”

you breathed heavily, grabbing your duffle bag from the side of the room and storming towards the door.

“i’m staying with yeji tonight, leave me the fuck alone.”

was all you said before leaving the boys stood in shock, confused as to why you were acting like you hated them.

regrettably, the minute you found yourself in yeji’s dorm and explained your day to her, you knew you were in the wrong. how could you let yourself treat your best friends that way? they didn’t deserve that, and you would be most understanding if they never forgave you. it was only when the throb in your head and ache in your joints became too much that you finally allowed yourself to sleep.

chan’s apology

luckily, you and the boys were granted a week off a while ago, and today marked the first day of that week. however, knowing chris he was probably still hauled up in the studio from the night before. it was around 3am (yeji shouldn’t have let you crash so early, your sleep schedule was going to be manic), so you pulled yourself together before making the decision to go visit him.

he may not even want to see you after your little outburst, but you could still try.

you stopped by the convenience store on your way to the studio, grabbing some snacks and some drinks just to be on the safe side. carefully checking the group chat, you saw that changbin was still in the studio with chan and you hoped you could get there before he left - it might be easier to kill two birds with one stone. you were just glad you bought way too much food for just two people.

you smiled politely, bowing at the security guard as he let you into the building, heart thumping in your ears as you carefully traced the steps to chan’s studio.

when you finally approached the door, you had to take a minute to prepare yourself to knock. you heard chan’s voice mumbling behind the door once you did, nervously waiting until he came and opened it.

he looked surprised to see you, frozen for a moment before quickly ushering you in and sitting you on the couch next to changbin. almost in instinct, changbin’s arm was slung around your shoulder - something he always did when you were close by, relishing in the fact he wasn’t the shortest in the group anymore.

you sheepishly held out the bag containing all the goodies you got at the convenience store to chan, a small smile on your face when he took it.

“got you some snacks.. kind of guessed you might have forgotten to eat.” your voice was quiet, ashamed. you just hoped they wouldn’t hold your outburst against you.

but when chan grinned, you knew he could never be mad at you for long.

“we were worried about you, y’know? that’s why jisung let you go early today - something seemed off and we didn’t want you to get too overwhelmed.” changbin said from next to you, the hand on your shoulder rubbing it comfortingly.

you couldn’t stop the tears from welling up behind your eyes again, but bit them back in fear they’d think you were looking for sympathy.

“i– i’m so sorry. i’ve just had an awful day, and i feel like shit, but that doesn’t excuse my actions, and i shouldn’t have snapped at you all - you couldn’t have known, and its not your fault.”

you explained why your day had been so bad to them (after some pushing from chan), and how you were feeling physically, causing changbin to look at you with great worry.

they indulged in a small cuddle session, feasting on the snacks you provided while they tried to help cheer you up. and honestly, it worked, just talking through how you were feeling, and gettin constructive feedback rather than just a shoulder to lean on was relieving.

you couldn’t apologize to them more, feeling so ashamed of your actions, but they were quick to reassure you it was okay - everyone had bad days, you were only human after all. you just needed to work on your communication a little bit.

when you finally got ready to head back to the dorm at 5am, you felt better than you had in a long time, actually.

apology numbers one and two: complete.

but when you arrived back at the dorm, head peacefully resting on changbin’s shoulder, what you weren’t expecting to walk into was what you all called a “cuddle pool” - the sofa bed pulled out, covered with pillows and blankets - and a spot waiting for you between felix and seungmin.

your eyes watered at the expectant faces of your soul-brothers, small sobs leaving your lips as your shoulders shook. god, the day had taken a toll on you - you couldn’t remember the last time you cried in front of the boys.

it was only then that minho - who you hadn’t seen standing by the door - scooped you into a hug.

“oh, angel,” he frowned, a hand pressed to your forehead. “you’re burning up. is that why you felt so bad earlier?”

words seemed to fail you, and all you could do was nod as your grip on his sweater tightened. it certainly wouldn’t be the first time you got sick from stress, but you hated being sick. you hated feeling out of control in your own body, and despised being doted on like you were unable. however, this time… you think you could let it slide. you just needed your boys close by right now.

they seemed to enjoy looking after you, and you felt you owed them that after the situation in the practice room.

minho was quick to place on you on the couch, felix and seungmin suffocating you in a bone-crushing hug. jisung handed you the tv remote, saying you could choose to watch whatever you wanted, and that everyone would be having a slumber party in the living room until you felt better.

minho and chan had gone to make you some chicken noodle soup - using felix’s mom’s recipe, which was known for being a lifesaver in your dorm. jeongin was quick to grab you your comfort plushie, taking his place on the floor by your feet - the two of you were 100% keen on physical affection, but having him close by helped.

within merely an hour, all nine of you were curled up, an animated disney movie playing, with soup and mugs of tea being passed around the room. it was nice, and it felt so good to have your boys so close and willing to help you.

you definitely took on changbin’s mention of needing to improve on communication, wanting nothing more than to improve yourself for the little family you had build around you. and yeah you were sick, and they would probably get sick too by being in such close proximity to you, but that was a problem for another day. you’d just return the favor of looking after them.

you just knew you were lucky to have them.

taglist: join taglist here @pretty-racha @chubbyanarkiss @taeriffic @mits-vi @chanssmiles @5kayzee @torixx80 @fawnpeaks @bangtanmix73 @savluvsmingi @boi-bi-ahaha

#mixtape-racha #mixtape-racha fic #stray kids x reader #skz x reader #skz 9th member #fem reader #chan x reader #minho x reader #changbin x reader #hyunjin x reader #jisung x reader #felix x reader #seungmin x reader #jeongin x reader #skz hurt comfort #skz angst

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she-posts-nerdy-stuff · 21 days

Text

Okay I’ve been toying with an idea for a Six of Crows au post-Crooked Kingdom where Van Eck won for a little while now and yeah idk but I had a scene idea come to me just now so I’m gonna write it here to see what you guys think and if there’s any interest then I might add it to my list of fics to write

This feels like a weird introduction but, er, here we go:

Inej knew the moment Kaz got home. There were no longer any crowds in the house to come to attention at his entrance, or if there were then no-one had bothered to come down to the half-room and tell Inej, but she could hear his voice drifting through the vents as soon as the door upstairs banged shut behind him.

“Where’s Inej?”

“Where do you think?” Matthias’ reply came roughly, and Inej could all but picture the disapproving grimace that must be crossing his face about now.

Let him judge. She didn’t need to leave the half-room, and for as long as that was true she wouldn’t. The vents did not give her every room though, and she did miss gathering her secrets. She wondered if there was anyone else in the house, but the five of them. Five? She stopped and counted them on her fingers. Yes, five. Hopefully still five. Inej had not bothered to leave the half-room in days, and no-one had been down to see her since yesterday morning.

She heard the door click open behind her, of course, but she did not bother to look up as Dirtyhands entered the room.

“Wraith,”

“Don’t you read the papers, Kaz?” Inej asked, without turning, “The Wraith is dead,”

She stood up, hand wandering across the table for her little pot of jurda. It tasted like shit and it wasn’t nearly as strong as she wanted it to be, but it took less than a month for the price of the blossoms to surpass the height of the stars so she’d have to make do with whatever they had left.

“Inej-”

“They found her body on the steps outside the Church of Barter almost three months ago, remember?” she finally turned to face Kaz, unscrewing the lid on the little silver pot as she did so, “Killed by some mercenary called the White Blade, who still hasn’t been found by they way in case you haven’t seen the latest. I guess it’s difficult to catch a ghost,”

Difficult to catch a wraith.

“We’ve had this conversation several times, Inej-”

“And we’re going to have it again,”

Inej placed an orange jurda blossom on her tongue, then offered the open container to Kaz. It was almost empty. He waved her off.

“I thought you didn’t go in for that sort of thing,”

Inej shrugged.

“Gotta stay awake somehow, haven’t I? We’re busy,”

“We’re not on a job”

“We’re never on a job. Unless the reason you’ve bothered to grace me with your presence is a proposition?”

Kaz shook his head.

“I just wanted to tell you there’s no news,”

Inej looked away. There was never any news. And yet somehow she always expected differently.

“He’s dead, isn’t he?”

“Probably,”

Inej caught another jurda blossom between her fingers. She needed to stay awake, because if she slept she would see him. She would see all the ways she’d failed.

“It wasn’t your fault, Inej, we’re having the same conversations on repeat can’t you see-,”

“And we’ll have them again,” she shrugged, “We will have this conversation again, Kaz, because I made a mistake and you are coddling me like a child who won’t be able cope if you tell them something was their fault. Tell me it was my fault, Kaz! We both know that it’s true,”

Kaz shook his head.

“I’d rather repeat the previous,”

“Then let’s,” snapped Inej, because hell if this jurda wasn’t strong enough to keep her awake then maybe an argument would be, “Let’s repeat the goddamn conversation, Kaz, because you’re right. We have the same two conversations on repeat and do you want to know why? Because I am owning up to the mistake I made and I am trying to deal with the consequences of it, but you had no right to do what you did, do you understand me? You messed up and you need to take some damn responsibility, because if you think-”

“You always knew Tailoring Dunyasha’s body to look like yours was a possibility for your escape option,” said Kaz, calmly.

She hated how quiet his voice was, how slow and deliberate he sounded next to the and ramblings that she could not stop from stumbling out of her.

“You know that’s not what I meant,” she hissed, slamming her jurda back down on the table.

“I couldn’t have done anything to stop that,”

“You could have tried,”

“Inej-”

“Shevrati,”

Know-nothing.

She waved a hand vaguely at the door.

“Get out,”

Kaz turned to leave, then paused.

“I am sorry, Inej. They’d like to see you upstairs, you know. Nina misses you,”

“Nina can come down here then,”

“Inej… I can’t do anything for you but apologise,”

“Keep you apologies,” she snarled, and when the door had closed behind him added: “Choke on them,”

Kaz could apologise all he wanted. She would not forgive him. What right did he have to expect anything different from her than this? Did any of them? Kaz had not had to watch his parents cry, as they carried home the body of a child that wasn’t theirs. Kaz had not had to feel the ironclad grip of the person he thought he’d trusted most in the world as they held him back and told him to swallow his sobs and keep quiet. Kaz had not given up and gone limp in their arms, a mess of tears and useless prayers, as he saw his parents slip from his grasp once again and knew that he would not have the chance to tell them truth.

Kaz had also not failed the others, and did not have to feel the truth of that choking him every time he saw them. Kaz had not spent almost three months barely daring to venture out of the half room, just so he would never have to lock eyes with Jesper Fahey. There was a scream inside Inej that had been slowly building itself since the day of the auction, and if she did not find a way to release it soon it may very well eat her alive.

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kllingdaddy · 4 months

Text

Relief - Emily Prentiss x Reader (smut)

Hi guys, this is actually my first character x reader oneshot/fic EVER so that's cool. I've never really liked Y/N nor liked writing Y/N fics but I've come to realize that there are little to NO SUB EMILY PRENTISS SMUT FICS ON HERE so obviously i had to change that. idk if ill be writing another one of these, i was really just trying this writing style out, but if one of u guys send me a request i maybe might write it! (just an fyi i only write sub emily so)

Warnings: smut, 18+, dom/sub, dom reader, sub emily, reader g!p (reader has a dick), slight mommy kink, edging, rough sex, oral sex, fingering...i think that's all?

Since the day you met Emily Prentiss, you knew she liked to be dominated.

The truth shone in her eyes. Just because she was a confident agent didn't mean she was a top. Maybe she liked to pretend she was a top, but in the end she wanted someone to take charge, someone to show her where her place really was. And in this case, her place was in your office, on her knees.

The woman had been a pure brat today, flirting with another agent right in front of you even though you two are dating and have been for about four months now. She was the kind of bottom that liked to test the waters and see how far she could go without getting caught. She liked to play with fire, and you liked to show her how it felt to get burned.

"Y/N, please." Emily had been begging for release for the past ten minutes, but you were ignoring her, focusing on the paperwork at your desk. You could hear the soft buzzing sounding from between her legs and you smiled to yourself. A small vibrator was shoved up her cunt, and you warned her that if she were to come without permission she would receive a punishment way worse than this.

You read through your files even though you didn't have to; they could certainly wait until tomorrow, you just liked to listen to Emily whine and whimper. She was a sight when she was desperate. Flushed cheeks, little pants leaving her lips, her dripping cunt probably making a mess on the floor. She had never looked more beautiful.

"Please, please Y/N, let me come, I'll be good," she promised, sounding more desperate with each passing second. "I'm sorry, baby, I'll be a good girl, please—"

You finally stopped what you were doing and turned to face her, adopting a sympathetic expression that was clearly fake. "Oh, you'll be a good girl, princess?"

Emily nodded frantically, biting her lip to repress a moan.

"Oh, well..." You walked over to her and bent down, taking her jaw in your hand and forcing her to look you in the eye. "You should've thought about that before you flirted with that guy. You're lucky I don't edge you for a month for pulling that little stunt, baby girl."

"I'm sorry," she whimpered, and arousal stirred within you when you watched a tear roll down her cheek. "I just wanted..." she swallowed, embarrassed of what she was going to say next.

"Oh I know what you wanted, baby," you said, releasing her jaw. "You wanted my attention, hm? Like the fucking whore you are? Wanted mommy's attention all on you instead of the work we had to do."

Emily whined and rubbed her thighs together. You knew how much it turned Emily on when you called yourself "mommy", so this was only going to frustrate her more.

"Such a fucking brat," you hissed. "You're lucky I don't go out and kill that guy for leering at you like you were a meal. I thought you knew better than to purposely make mommy jealous. I guess you're no longer my good girl, huh?"

"No mommy, I'm your good girl. Please." She looked up at you with huge doe eyes, wet with tears. "I'll never do it again. I only want you. Please?"

You mockingly pouted at her. "Aw, baby. You're so desperate, aren't you? What do you want? Tell mommy."

"To come. I want to come. Please let me come." She was on the verge of sobs now, and you only smirked.

"Okay baby...I'll let you come." Emily perked up, but you raised a finger quickly. "If you manage to make me come in one minute, I'll let you come. Do you understand?"

She nodded. "Yes, mommy."

"But if you don't make me come...well." You shrugged. "I'm going to fuck your mouth and cunt until I do, and you're not going to be allowed to come once."

"I'll make you come, I will." She seemed determined, and you smiled lovingly down at her.

You unbuttoned your slacks and pushed them to the floor along with your boxers, your hard cock already leaking with pre-cum. Seeing Emily whine so prettily had made you beyond hard.

Emily stared at your cock with wide eyes, as if she'd never seen it before. You smirked and nudged it against her lips. "Open up, baby."

She dropped her jaw and stuck her tongue out like a good girl.

You slipped your cock into her mouth and she immediately got to work, running her talented tongue along the base of it, effortlessly tearing a groan from your throat. You had received a lot of head in your life, but no blow-jobs compared to the ones Emily gave. She was so enthusiastic with her mouth, always more than eager to please.

"Oh, fuck, princess. That's it, good fucking girl." Your eyes fluttered shut at the feeling of her hot, wet mouth. She continued to lick and suck, and within the thirty second mark you were already feeling your orgasm build up. "F-Fuck, Jesus, you're gonna make me come. You're gonna make me come so hard in your mouth, baby. And you're gonna drink it all like a—fuck—good girl."

With ten seconds to spare, you came in her mouth, shooting your load all the way down her throat. Your body nearly crumbled afterwards, and seeing Emily lick the remnants of you off her lips only made your jelly legs worse.

"I made you come," she grinned, lazily pumping you in her hand. "It's my turn now."

You shot her a warning glare. "Do I have to remind you who's in charge here?" It was a rhetorical question so of course, she didn't answer. You slipped your hands between her legs and retrieved the vibrator, still buzzing and soaked with her slick.

She sagged in relief as you pulled it out of her. Her scent was so heavy and thick that it filled the office completely, making your cock instantly hard again. It felt like a crime to smell her and not taste her, so you mischievously held her gaze as you licked a long stripe up the vibrator that had just been nestled inside of her.

Her pupils were so blown, all you could see was pitch black. You gave the vibrator another slow lick and moaned at the taste of her. "You taste divine, princess."

"Fuck," she whimpered, already grinding the air, desperately searching for relief in any form. You let a laugh slip and hauled her up, and within seconds you had her bent over your desk, your fingers finding solace in her hair and tightening, pressing her face hard against the surface of the desk.

You swiped a finger through her dripping folds, humming happily. "You're so fucking wet for mommy, baby. Is this all for me?"

Emily whimpered, trying to nod against the desk. "Yes, it's all for you. Need you so bad."

You just hummed again. "Your cunt is so pretty and soft. I bet it's tight, too. Your cunt is always so tight. Should I use my fingers to check?"

"Fingers, tongue, cock, anything, just please touch me," she begged.

"Your wish is my command, princess." You slowly slid two fingers inside of her, producing a loud gasp from her lips. She arched into you and you added another finger without issue. "My god, baby, you're so easy to slide into. So fucking soaked. I'll be able to slide my cock in with no problem."

"Please, need you now. Fuck me, Y/N."

You yanked her head back to kiss her harshly, then released her, taking hold of your cock and sliding it in without warning. She gasped loudly as you grunted, the feeling too good for words. Emily always felt amazing, but she seemed to feel even moreso every time they fucked.

You thrusted into her, making her cry out and you were beyond grateful that the building was empty aside from you two. Although judging by all of Emily's other kinds, you wouldn't be surprised if she wanted to be fucked during work hours just to experience the thrill of it. It was one of the many things you loved about her.

"You feel so good, pretty girl," you moaned, pulling out and thrusting into her again. "Like you were made for me. I can feel you clenching my cock. You gonna come, baby?"

"Yes. Yes, fuck, gonna come."

"You can come, baby."

You brushed her hair off her neck and started peppering the pale skin with kisses, hearing her breathing become more labored with each thrust. You were sucking particularly hard on her neck when she came, practically sinking into your arms from the intensity of it.

"You did so good, princess," you murmured into her ear, holding her body close as she came down from her high. "I'm proud of you for holding it."

"Jesus Christ," she sighed, resting her head back against your shoulder. "I'm tired."

You chuckled and kissed her cheek lovingly. "I bet you are. Let's get you home and into bed, yeah?"

You gathered your things and helped her get cleaned up before guiding her out of your office and towards the elevator. She looked like she'd just received the best fucking of her life, and if it wasn't so late and the team were here, they would have a field day.

"Oh, and princess?"

Emily looked at you as you both entered the elevator. "Yeah baby?"

You abruptly grabbed her chin and stamped a hard kiss to her lips, murmuring, "don't ever flirt with someone who isn't me again."

She blinked and swallowed, hard. "Yes ma'am."

#emily prentiss smut #emily prentiss #criminal minds #emily prentiss oneshot #emily prentiss x reader #emily prentiss and reader #emily prentiss fanfiction

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thisisarcanereverie · 11 months

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May i request a Yandere Moonknight System with a reader who’s like visiting London on work or something and they meet one of the boys. over their stay they get close as the boys show them around London and they sort of ignore the fact reader eventually has to leave untill they tell the boys they’re leaving the next day and they snap and take reader. Idk if that makes sense. 🤍

Cutting Ties (Dark! Moon Knight x Reader)

A/N: This is Part 1 of a 3 Part fic. This is also a dark fic so please DNI Minors and others. (I got a little carried away with this idea Anon so thank you for the suggestion)

Now if you can interact or want to, please do! Like, reblog, reply!

DISCLAIMERS/WARNINGS: kidnapping, angst (like a ridiculous amount of it), light cursing, I've never been to London or England in general so I'm going based off of what I've seen, English is my first language I just suck at it. I do not own the picture above but i DO own the header below, it's something that I made. I might make a few others idk. Enjoy!

Summary: You're a former Widow on the run, only in London for a year you meet Steven Grant, a goofy gift shoppist. But is there more that meets the eye?

You weren’t sure what it was about London, maybe it was the almost constant cloud looming over the city-or perhaps it was the way you barely understood what the people around you were saying- but you didn’t get what all the hype was about. Yes, it was beautiful if you put a filter over it looking at it through a tourist’s perspective. However, looking past all the buzz and touristy wonder, it was just like every other city- gray, busy, and foul smelling–filled to the brim with more people than it could possibly provide for. The only difference was the currency and the fact that everyone sounded like they came out of either Downtown Abbey or Derby Girls.

You sighed as you reminded yourself that you were only going to be stuck here for another year, until this identity expired, then you got to go somewhere else, maybe somewhere warm and remote. Though you doubt it, that’s the thing about being on the run–you don’t get to choose where you go. You’ve been running close to 8 years now, almost a decade. Ever since Natasha Romanoff sent the Red Room hurdling from the sky and freed every Widow in the process, including you. How you got here exactly was a very long story, with parts you would rather not relive.

You looked out the window of the bus, filled with thoughts of nothing but warm places with lots of sun and color with next to no people around. You could probably stay there longer than usual, hell maybe forever if you were careful. You could feel a small smile gracing your features as you thought of a nice, quaint home; decorated with plants, a nice kitchen to practice cooking in–oh and a sunroom that doubled as a greenhouse of sorts. You started making a list of flowers you would like to grow when you felt a sudden, foreign weight on your shoulder. You turned your head away from the silver light of the window towards the dark mess of curls next to you. You recognize him almost immediately, you don’t know his name but he always got off at that museum you’ve been meaning to visit, he always looked so tired with dark almost bruise like circles under his eyes; his dark hair almost in a permanent state of unkempt. You looked at his face a bit longer before your eyes trailed to his hands, his knuckles were white with how harshly he was gripping his bag and sweat was starting to form on his brow. A nightmare. You got those as well.

As gently as you could you shook him, it didn’t take much until he bolted upright and took a few very sharp breaths. You could see his eyes dart erratically in fear before finally settling on you, you couldn’t help but remark on the lovely shade of brown his eyes were. A moment or two passed by before his eyes met the ground and his cheeks flushed.

“I’m so sorry” he hurriedly apologized, eyes still trained on the ground, “didn’t realize I nodded off there.”

“It’s quite alright,” you assured smiling gently at him, “if you don’t mind me asking but do you suffer from nightmares often?” his eyes went from the ground back at you, “I don’t mean to pry it’s just that I’ve seen you a few times on here and you always look exhausted.”

“Yeah um,” he cleared his throat, “I, uh, I would guess so– not that I can’t tell the difference– it’s just complicated to explain–not that I wouldn’t tell you if I could, it’s just the best way I can explain it and I probably sound like such a knob.” You hold in a slight chuckle as his cheeks flush even more.

“I don’t think so,” you say, “I get those kinds of dreams often as well. The ones you feel like they belong to someone else…but not at the same time, I guess it really is difficult to explain out loud.” you hold out your hand and introduce yourself as the man beside you hesitantly accepts it.

“Steven Grant.”

///////////////////////////////////////////////////

That was almost a year ago, after introducing yourselves you gave him your number (which he called not even an hour after he got off the bus). At first you would just meet up for tea but tea quickly became more intimate. You would call each other during the nights that were the hardest to sleep or to dream. You would tell him about your hope to live somewhere remote one day, in a place full of sunshine and color and he would be silent and listen. It wasn’t long until he confided in you about his condition, and you met Marc Spector and Jake Lockely respectively.

You weren’t sure why but when Marc appeared he seemed familiar, for a moment you wondered if you had met him at some point but you were sure that you would’ve remembered. The Red Room forced you to have a good memory after all.

Jake on the other hand was completely different from Steven and Marc, where Steven was shy and Marc stiff, Jake was suave. He had kissed your hand and said dirty things to you in spanish, to which you surprised him by replying fluently and dirtier.

After some time you grew comfortable with Marc and Jake and went on dates with them as well. For a while you were happy, first time ever since coming to London. You were practically living in Steven’s small flat and you spent your days living as a normal person would. You pretended not to notice the weird things, like them leaving in the middle of the night or the strange looks they would sometimes get looking at absolutely nothing. You never pried or judged, it wasn’t like you aired out all the skeletons in your closet either. You never told them your real name (or at least the name the Red Room gave you) or where you came from or basically anything of substance at all about your past. You didn’t want to, it wasn’t like you didn’t trust them, but you feared what would happen if you did tell them. Tell them your real name, that you used to be a Black Widow and killed people. That the reason why you hated the color red was because it reminded you of the Red Room and the blood that stained your hands, how your nightmares were memories and that ghosts that haunted you refused to die.

Somewhere along the way you started to forget that this life you were living with your job and your boys wouldn’t last forever. That sooner or later reality creeps in and brutally murders the fantasy you have created and as you hold the almost expired passport in your hand you remember the cold truth. That you never should’ve gotten involved, that you slipped and got attached and worst of all..you’d gotten someone else attached as well. Without you knowing the year you had left in London was almost up, in less than two months you will be off again to a new corner of the world with a new name and a new life.

Deep down though you knew, knew that you couldn’t not go. Choosing to remain this person you’ve created with her perfectly normal job with her perfectly normal life with her not so normal–but still perfect–boyfriend was never an option. Too many people want you, for various reasons from recruitment to revenge for what you did as a Widow; and those people would stop at nothing to get to you, even if that meant hurting someone you’ve loved.

You’re doing this, for them, you had to leave. There was no other option, and it was better to break it off now rather than leaving in the middle of the night. You fought the urge to be selfish, to keep living this life with them until you board your one way flight. So with a deep breath you stuffed your passport back into its folder in the drawer you owned and grabbed your trench coat and umbrella. You did not let a single tear fall as you hauled a cab to take you to the familiar route to their flat. You tried not to think at all, you knew if thought for a little too long you would talk yourself out of this. You knew this would probably be easier over text, you wouldn’t need to tell those big brown eyes goodbye and see them fill with tears or hate. It would be so easy…but you couldn’t. You knew that if you didn’t end it in person Steven, Marc, or Jake would show up at your door and wouldn’t leave until you did what you were doing right now. Telling them in person that it was over.

You didn’t waste time when the cab stopped in front of his building, you told the driver to wait and that you would be back down in just a few moments. Your heels clacked against the wet pavement towards the door which a kind, elderly neighbor of Steven’s you’ve gotten to know opened the door for you to which you smiled and thanked him. Every move you made was robotic, you weren’t even thinking you were just on auto pilot. Hoping that they wouldn’t be able to tell the slight shake in your hand or how stiff you were. You reminded yourself that you were doing this for them, and for you as well.

You entered the lift and pressed the button for their floor, the fluorescent light flickers a few times and the hum and rattle of the wires lifting the metal box do nothing to quiet the thrumming of your heart. Seconds pass by like hours before finally the sliding doors reveal the dimly lit hallway. One you’ve walked through dozens of times by now looks more like death row. You let not one tear drop as you walked, you couldn’t–you couldn’t let those doubting thoughts and happy memories pass through your head as you knocked on his door. Hearing a shuffling and the clattering of dishes before you hear them walk to the door. You could tell by the slight difference in gait that Steven was fronting and it hurt. You had hoped silently that it wouldn’t be him, your sweet Steven, with his unkempt curls and goofy grin. One who read you facts about Egyptian mythology and ancient history during stormy nights, who woke you from nightmares and held you gently like you were the most precious thing to ever exist. The sleepy man on the bus who laid his head on your shoulder and slept, who called you not even an hour after giving him your number. Please not him.

He opened the door and sure enough it was Steven.

“There you are love,” He said, a wide smile adorning his face as he ushered you in, “Me and the boys were wondering where you were,” he kissed your cheek and took your coat, “dinners almost ready if you need to wash up.” You stood there motionless, unsure of what to do. This wasn’t the first time you’ve cut ties with someone that you’ve cared for. However this was different, he was different. Steven, Marc, and Jake were probably the first people you’ve ever loved. You would do anything for them, anything, as long as they lived and were content and happy.

Even if it meant hurting them.

Even if it meant you could only watch from afar.

You took in a deep breath, willed your heart to stop beating before speaking.

“Steven.” He stopped immediately, you never called him by his name, only ever called him your sweetheart, or baby, or whatever other nickname came into mind but never his name. He turned away from the little stovetop and looked at you. You willed your voice to not falter as you continued, “we all need to talk.”

“Oh god,” Steven whispered, “how bad?”

“We need to talk,” You said not answering, “please.”

Wordlessly Steven turned the stove off as he made his way to you, you held up your hand when he was only a few steps away.

“Are they present?” You asked.

“They weren’t before but now they are,” He said, eyes furrowing in worry, “we’re starting to get a little worried love what’s going on?”

“I,” you start before swallowing the lump that has suddenly formed in your throat, “I’ve gotten a call from the main office, they’re relocating me in a few months to help on a different classified project.”

“Oh,” Steven said with confusion written all over his face, “where?”

“That’s classified.” You said, nails biting into your palm to stop yourself from getting emotional.

“When will you be back?”

Silence fills the room, you bite back the urge to say anything that would give him hope. After a few seconds you see his eyes widen as he looks at the mirror beside you.

“No,” he said to the mirror, “no, no she’s not,” he turns to you with tears pricking his dark eyes making them shine, “love, tell them that you’re not-”

“I am,” you say, careful to keep a cold tone despite the urge to cry, “I’m not coming back. It’s a permanent relocation.”

“But you can still come to visit,” he says hurriedly, tears still pricking his eyes as he runs a hand through his hair, “we-we, we can um, we can face-call or um, or we can text and call and we can make this work, I know we can make this work love.” you opened your mouth to say something when he cut you off, a few tears leaking through and leaving wet streaks down his cheek, “or you could tell them no, tell them that you refuse the offer!”

“I can’t say no,” you said gently.

“Yes you can,” Steven said, his large hands gripping your shoulders, “you can tell them no.”

“I can’t Steven,” you tell him, “I’ll lose my job if I do and I can’t.”

“Then we can face call,” he says, his hands now cradling your face, leaving small kisses on your face that feel like knives in your heart, “we can make this work.”

“We can’t,” you said as you gently pry his hands from your face, you reach into your pocket and grab the spare key he gave you after a month into your relationship and put it in his hand. “I’m sorry.”

“Wait,” Steven says silently, his head hung, his crying seemingly subsided “can you please stay, stay with me, be with me until you go.”

A moment of silence happens, for a moment you reconsider, but then you kiss his lips. Salt and vegan chocolate stain your tongue until you pull back, resting your forehead against his momentarily. You imagine what life you could’ve had with them, one full of good days and bad days. You’d adopt a cat with him, you would laugh as he declared the cat his mortal enemy for looking at Gus for a moment too long. You’d save up together and buy a nice cottage in the countryside, maybe you’d get married, maybe you wouldn’t. But you could imagine what it would be like to grow old with him, when your hair would turn white and gray, when your skin would start to sag and he would still be there to tell you you’re as beautiful as the day he met you on that small bus all those years ago. It’s a nice life, one you know you would be more than content with.

But you know it’s not a life you can have.

“Goodbye.”

With that you left, closing the door behind you and walking to the lift. Walking away from the life you knew you could never live, not without constantly looking over your shoulders. You knew secrets always have ways of coming to the light, so even if you did stay how long would it be until he discovered yours. How long until he has a gun to his head and a target on his back? No, this was the choice, this was the only option. You made the right call, while you may not get to live that life; he still could. He’ll find someone else, someone to love and who will hopefully love him as much.

The doors slid closed and the wires hummed and groaned as they lifted you back down where the cab was waiting. You decided to walk and paid the cab for their time. You knew with the heels you were wearing you would regret it later but you didn’t care, you needed some time to think. You walked through the lit streets, you watched as people laughed and a few occasionally public criers. You stopped and waved at the living statue man that Steven introduced to you before walking on. This was a path that you and the boys would walk sometimes, they didn’t like going out much and neither did you, but the exercise did you good. You checked your phone to see how much time you had left before you had to board your flight. It seemed like you had enough time to go home, grab your duffle and carry on before the cab you called before you left arrived.

“Excuse me miss,” You turned to see a little girl no older than ten addressing you. She was a small thing, with dark curls and even darker eyes, she dressed as a white gown with a flower crown. “Do you care for some flowers?” You remember briefly seeing similarly dressed kids in the plaza not too far away, you gathered that maybe she had wandered away from the group unnoticed.

“You know what,” You kneeled down to her height, “I would love some flowers, but first let’s get you back to your group alright?” the girl looked around as if she’s realizing she’s not where she’s supposed to be, for a moment you’re worried about her crying as you see tears start forming in her eyes. You take the hand not holding onto the small basket of flower seeds gently, “don’t cry little one, we’ll get you back to your group all safe and sound.” You see her nod as she holds your hand in her tiny one as you lead her back to the brightly lit plaza just a few buildings away. She points to two women frantically looking and calling out a name. You let her hand go and watch as she runs towards who you assume are her mothers.

“Oh my stars,” you hear the taller woman breathe out in relief, “where did you run off too?”

“I-I went to go give flowers.” You heard the little girl sniffle before she pointed at you, “she helped me.” You gave a small awkward smile and wave before the smaller woman gave you a hug.

“Thank you so much,” She said before letting you go. “We were talking with the play director for one mo and the next-”

“No need,” you said, “she’s a sweet kid, adventurous too apparently.”

“You have no idea.” the mother sighed as she looked at the now giggling child in her wife's arms, “Angie loves to get into trouble.” you see her smile before returning her gaze back to you, “anyways thank you again.”

“No problem,” you say before turning your eyes towards Angie and her taller mother, “it was nice to meet you, and you too Angie–listen to your mum’s.” you went to walk away before you felt a soft tug on your sleeve. You looked down to see Angie holding up a packet of flower seeds to you.

“Here’s your flower miss,” Angie said sweetly, tears long gone, “thank you for helping me find my mum’s.” you gently take the packet of seeds from her and smile,

“you’re welcome, good luck with your play.” You said as you waved her goodbye as she went to take her place next to the various other children in similar attire. You stood there a moment longer, watching this small family you’ve encountered. All you’ve ever known of family was what the Red Room told you of. Your birth certificate was destroyed along with every other Widow’s, even then you doubt that your parents still walked the earth. Dreykov wasn’t one to leave loose ends.

You walked away from the plaza then, away from the brightly lit place and back onto dimly lit streets making your way past the few passersby and back to your building where a single duffle bag and carry on waited for you.

You had been brave the entire day, you had not let a single tear drop but once the door to your flat closed behind you all the resolve you had crumbled. You slid down the door as tears profusely fell down your cheeks leaving hot traces behind. You couldn’t hold back the sobs that had threatened to come out earlier. Your fingers shakily trace your lips as you hold onto the last kiss you shared with him. Your hand then went to your chest and clutched the material of your shirt as a sharp, throbbing pain in your chest grew. Every part of you was screaming, all for different things. There was physical pain like the ache in your feet and the pain in your chest, but the emotional pain–that was the worst of it. This was the kind of pain that teetered between hell and heaven.

So this was it.

This was heartbreak.

You don’t know how long you stayed there–teetering–but you knew you couldn’t be long. Soon you would have to pick yourself up, bite through every step as though it didn’t feel like you were walking on glass, grab that duffle and carry on, and leave. You let out a bitter smile as you remember that fateful day you met your boys, how you were planning on what flowers to plant in that dream home of yours. You reached into your pocket and grabbed that small bag of flower seeds.

Purple Hyacinth.

Sorrow

You laughed at the irony.

How fitting.

////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////

“What do you mean my flight is canceled?”

“Just what I mean ma’am, the weather report-”

“It’s bloody London, has there ever been a clear sunny sky in London?”

“No..bu-”

“Alright,” you sigh, pinching the bridge between your brows, “I’m not trying to be difficult, I know you’re just doing your job, are there any flights cleared to take off?” You see the person type a few buttons on their keyboard and a few clicks of the mouse before looking back at you with false sympathy.

“I’m sorry ma’am all the ones cleared already took off.”

Shit, that leaves you with two options: going back to the flat or staying at the airport until morning…with a sigh you grab your bags and get ready to grab a late taxi back to your place. At least there you could shower and cry in private. First thing tomorrow morning you’ll get on the next plane to, you look at your ticket again Cincinnati, Ohio. At least you won’t stay there, your inside guy did you a solid and got you away from people. You’ll be in a small property big enough for one in a small town. It wasn’t ideal but at least you were away from the city stench. You’ll have to drive to places this time instead of hailing a cab, but you didn’t mind. All in all, it was an ok set up, much more preferable than your previous arrangement.

You tried to hail a cab for ten minutes, everyone that passed was either already paid or just didn’t see you. Eventually you thought you were going to have to bite the bullet and sleep on the uncomfortable airport lounges when a cab finally pulled up. You thanked god as you put your luggage in the trunk and got into the backseat.

“Where to miss?” the man asked, you didn’t even look at him as you replied. Instead watching the water drip steadily down the window pane.

“Too bad for the weather eh?” This driver asked in a thick cockney accent.

“Yeah I guess,” you replied, “though I guess it fits.” silence passes before he replies.

“Tough day issit?”

“Like you wouldn’t believe.” you said, closing your eyes, “it just doesn’t end.”

“Know what that’s like,” he replies, “I had a share of bad days myself.”

“Oh yeah?” You responded.

“Like today,” You hear him respond, “I burned my hand while making dinner for me and my girlfriend, we’ve been going on for a year or so by now. She is the most beautiful creature you’ve ever seen, inside and out. Anyways the day only gets worse from there, she comes about half an hour early to dinner without warning. I knock my poor toe on the way to the door to let her in; hurt like anything. So I open the door, she’s as radiant as ever, only she’s got this sad look in her eyes, something I’ve never seen before. Turns out, she’s been lying to me… she said her job was taking her away and that she wouldn’t be able to be with us anymore.” a sinking feeling settled into your stomach, “we begged, we pleaded but no. She was adamant, and then she left, without another word. Isn’t that cruel?” You open your eyes to look into the rearview mirror, a chill went through your body as your eyes met a familiar dark pair. “Isn’t it mi carissima?” the accent drops into the deep spanish accent. You’re about to open the door when you feel a pinch on the side of your neck, and slowly the world blurred and then faded into nothing.

(Here's Part 2)

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cowgurrrl · 1 year

Text

Losing My Cool

Pairing: rockstar!joel miller x actress!reader

Author’s note: shortie short but I’ve already got another part half finished 🤠 fic named after this song

Summary: What do they say about all good things? [1.1k]

Warnings: yearning idiots, probably incorrect interview technique, idk what else

A PA brings you over to your mark and instructs you to stay there until your name gets called, which seems simple enough, but she stays nearby to make sure you don't wander. It feels a little silly to always have to be babysat, but you brush it off, smoothing your hands down your blue dress and taking deep breaths. You've done late-night shows before, but they still make you nervous, especially since you know just how many people watch them. Ryan sent you a video of Elizabeth sitting in front of the TV, watching an ad for tonight's show, and cheering when she saw your name and face. So, who knows who else might be watching if your five-year-old goddaughter is?

You can hear the introductory remarks, laughter, and applause that come with them, but you miss the voices whisper-arguing behind you. They die down by the time your brain wraps around the sounds and decide to stay focused. And you do. You run through what you want to say about the movie, fun anecdotes, and easy ways to skate around questions about Joel. You feel settled and prepared until familiar hands wrap around your middle, making you jump and turn in his arms.

"You're gonna get me in trouble," you say, and Joel smirks.

"I had to convince the production assistant to let me come kiss my girlfriend for good luck."

"You're getting fast and loose with that term, huh?"

"D'you want me to stop?" He asks, his thumbs swiping over your hips, and you shake your head.

"I kinda like it."

"Good," Joel says as the band starts playing, and you push at his shoulders. He quickly kisses you, his hand lingering on your lower back for a second longer than necessary, before rushing away with a mischievous look on his face. "Kick some ass!'

You laugh at the sentiment as your name gets called from the front of the stage, and the curtain opens enough to let you walk through. You smile and wave to the audience members as you walk over and shake Jimmy's hand. "Thank you so much for being here," he says so only you can hear, and you smile. The band vamps until you sit in the plush chair beside his desk and accept the applause when he repeats your name.

"It's so great to see you! You look fantastic!" He says, and you smile as you run your hands over the skirt of your dress.

"Thank you! I'm so happy to be here."

"Well, we are very lucky to have you. You've been a very, very busy lady these past few years. When was the last time you were in New York?" He asks, and you puff out your cheeks as you think.

"At least four or five years."

"And you went to school out here, right?"

"Yeah, I graduated from NYU. I was lucky enough to earn a full ride on a merit-based scholarship which doesn't happen very often, and once I graduated, I did a few projects here in the city before getting my first movie deal out in LA."

"That's amazing! And since then, you have been nonstop. I mean, you are everywhere. And you have a new movie coming out called Red Dirt Girl," he says as he holds up a picture of the movie poster, and the audience cheers at the image. You reach out to boop Lilly's nose and feel yourself smiling so hard that your cheeks hurt, but you're so happy. For once, it feels genuine. "What was it like to work on this film?"

"It was just the opportunity of a lifetime. We filmed out west around the Colorado-New Mexico border, and I hadn't even been out there, so it was so fun getting to know that area and working with the cast and crew. I mean, it was just like coming to work and having fun for twelve hours a day, and then we all lived in the same building, so we would just keep hanging out, and we got to be really close."

"And the girl who plays your sister, Lilly Porter, is just phenomenal for someone as young as she is. Did you find yourself getting protective of her?"

"Oh, absolutely. Lilly just turned sixteen about a month ago, but when we were filming, she had just turned fourteen, so she was really young, and I hadn't worked with someone that young that closely. And we had a day where we just sat down and talked for hours, and she's such an old soul, and she's so smart, but, I mean, we both know how hard the industry can be. So, I set her up with people I trust and gave her advice I wish someone had given me. I got really close with her family, and, of course, they are fantastic people as well. So, it was a learning curve for both of us, but she is an amazing, beautiful person, and I'm so lucky that I got to work with her. I totally consider her a little sister now."

"Which is ironic considering that you guys butt heads so much in this movie."

"Oh, yes, we do."

"Let's take a look at this clip here," he says as a short clip from the movie comes up on the screen behind you. Lilly's character, Sabrina, is arguing with your character, Jo, about getting sent home from school because of her behavior. Lilly perfectly portrays the annoying little sister as she stomps through the house, making sarcastic comments and driving you up the wall. The clip ends with Sabrina telling Jo that she's just like their mother, which obviously, hits Jo right where it hurts. You smile and clap along with the audience as the clip ends. "Wow! I mean, just fantastic! Were those scenes hard to shoot?"

"The scenes where we were fighting were really hard to film because I just love her so much, and I never wanted to yell at her, but Lilly was absolutely brilliant because she would do a new thing each time we shot the scene that would completely throw me off. So, like, one time she knocked over a chair or slammed the door so hard that pictures fell off the wall, and it would startle me each time, and then it was pretty easy to access that anger after that." You laugh, remembering the time you accidentally did raise your voice because she scared the shit out of you.

"And did the director tell her to do that?"

"No, she just did it! And Peter, the director, was just sitting there like," You cross your arms over your chest and lean back in the chair, copying the famous Peter Jankowski slouch, and nod, pretending to chew gum. "And like, that's it! Which is great! You always want a director that will let you try things, but I was given no warning." Jimmy laughs at the story and seamlessly transitions into a commercial break.

The rest of the interview goes smoothly, with you promoting the movie and even playing a game where you had to answer New York City trivia facts. Appearances like this can actually be really fun when they're done right, and you always have a good time when you're on the Tonight Show. As you're leaving the stage, Jimmy tells you that you and Joel have to get dinner with him and his wife the next time you're in the city, and you agree, knowing that it will probably never happen.

You're excited to see what Joel will say about how things went, but when you go backstage, he's nowhere to be found. You don't find him immediately in the wings where you left him or in your dressing room. You almost ask the PA if she saw him leave, but she's dealing with five million other things, and you doubt she would've noticed even if he did. You furrow your brows as you fish your phone from your purse and type out a quick message to Joel.

Hey! Where are you? I just got done.

The message delivers even though his phone is on Do Not Disturb. You think about calling him but figure he might've just gone back to the hotel room before you. Paparrazi gets pictures of you leaving the studio alone and shouts questions at you, wanting to know where Joel is. You don't answer. You just get in the car and try to get back to the hotel as fast as possible. Truthfully, you're a little embarrassed. You looked around for him like a lost puppy backstage, and now you're just dutifully returning to the hotel to look for him. It also doesn't help that you were photographed arriving with him but not leaving with him. You can feel Melanie's migraine from here.

When you scan into the hotel room, all of Joel's stuff is gone. His clothes, shoes, and even his razor have all disappeared. You were there for an hour, maybe less, and he just left? Your phone buzzes in your purse, and you quickly pull it out to see a text from Joel.

Ellie had an emergency. On the first flight back. I'm sorry. I'll make it up to you.

You sigh, plop down on the now too-big bed, and kick off your heels.

No worries. Take care of your baby. I'll see you when I get back.

Thank you. I owe you.

You don't owe me anything, Super Dad. Just text me when you get home, and keep me updated. Let me know if you or Sarah need anything.

He starts typing something before deleting it and then typing again. For a moment, you two stare at the same screen, waiting for the other to say something even though he's at the airport and you're in an empty hotel room. Your heart clenches in your chest as he types and types and types, just for the bubble to disappear as fast as he did.

#one for the money two for the show #the last of us #joel miller #joel miller x reader #joel tlou #the last of us x reader #joel miller fic #joel miller the last of us #joel miller fluff #tlou au #the last of us au #joel miller x female reader #rockstar!joel miller #rockstar!joel

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smilingbuckley · 4 days

Text

Okay, so the

Make me write

Post a few weeks ago helped me a lot with writing and working on fics I probably would've otherwise abandoned. And now I am once again in a writing slump. Soooo I wanna ask you to send an ask with emojis and I'll write a paragraph for each emoji :)

* anonymous asks are turned off, sorry for that but it is to protect myself *

And you can send as many as you want!! Let's see if we can get me to finish one! (Or a chapter)

This time I added a few more WIPs that I either have to rewrite or haven't starter yet but desperate want to.

👶 magically deaged Buck (a witch puts a spell on Buck so now he's a little kid again and Bathena raises him as they try to figure out how to remove the spell.) Bathena, Buddie, multi chapters, 3 chapters already posted back in october, working on chapter 4

💪 self defense fic (s2 AU. Buck got mugged and loses faith in his safety, so Bobby introduces him to Eddie who will teach him self defense. Not Buck isn't just struggling with feeling unsafe but also with finding Eddie, a stranger, attractive) gonna be a longer fic, I think about 3-4K is written? Will be a single chapter.

🫃 Omegaverse fic (Buck always believed he was a beta but then after mating with Eddie, am Alpha, he starts feeling strange. With the help of Bobby, he figures out that his parents lied to him and did an illegal surgery on him when he presented as an Omega to block any Omega hormones. Buck worries because Eddie only dated betas before him and they never talked about having children) Know this is not everyone's cup of tea since it's both onegaverse and mpreg. Not started yet though I have a snippet written down somewhere in my notes. It's about time I write this.

❤️‍🔥 reunion smut (Eddie had been in El Paso for a few months and comes back earlier to surprise Buck) I've had this in the works for months and still haven't finished it, oops? I'm at the smut part soooo I feel like I could finish this soon?

💕 Buck coming out to Chris - idk how I still haven't finished this one, it's supposed to be short lol

👨‍👧 Buck finds out he has a daughter - idk if it will be multiple chapters but it definitely will be a longer fic. I hope around 30k?

👨‍⚕️ Dr. Eddie fic - I love hospital aus so I'm not sure why I haven't written much for it. Maybe I'll end up rewriting what I have and hope it will get my inspo back?

👨‍❤️‍👨 fake dating fic - and the award to the longest wip I have goes to... no not really, the high school au took me longer to finish. Idk why I haven't written much for this because I love the story and it's been in my mind for sooo long. I just need inspiration

💛 Bobby & Buck fic - well, it's also Buck & Chris & Eddie and Buddie. Basically, they respond to a heavy call with a kid that hits hard. Of course Buddie check up on Chris, but Bobby also feels the need to be close to Buck

🧩 Puzzle fic - sweet and fluffy. Eddie gives Buck a puzzle, which confused Buck because Eddie knows that with Buck’s adhd, he's barely capable of spending 10 minutes on it. Even worse, there's no reference picture. Buck sees it as a challenge and slowly works on it, his curiosity getting the better of it. - not started yet

There are a few wips I almost added to this but then I would really be working on too many at once. Soo... once I finish one or two of these, maybe I'll tease them or add them to a post like this. (It's a PTA dads au and a whumpy fic based on a the rookie episode... honestly makes me want to reconsider not doing whumptober this year because it would be perfect)

Might take some time answering all asks, depends on how I'm feeling. Also might not answer in the order of asks sent, BUT I will try to answer everything over the next days

Taglist

@buddieswhvre @diazsdimples @tizniz @steadfastsaturnsrings @watchyourbuck @theotherbuckley @jesuiscenseedormir @loveyouanyway @chaosandwolves @mattsire @mel-vaz @inkmortal-trash389 @princess-of-the-snake-pit @nilletellsstories @laundryandtaxesworld @specialbrownieeater @m1kayu @bidisasterevankinard

#911 #evan buckley #buddie #eddie diaz #911 fanfic #buddie fanfiction #fanfiction #writing #911 abc #911 on abc

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the1975attheirverybest · 9 months

Text

A Strange Encounter

A/N: requested Matty X writer OC is finally here. Sorry about the delay. Idk if this is a longer fic soft launch or not. Just a thing I wrote

Warnings: none

———-

Matty swore he could feel the sweat running down his back. He glanced around the room, his anxiety rising as he failed to spot any of the faces that he’d expected to see here tonight. He’d spent the better part of the year wearing ties onstage, but, for some reason, in this moment, his tie felt suffocating. He loosened it slightly but quickly fixed it back up, feeling like a fish out of water at this charity event.

Scanning the room for a quiet place to take refuge in, he spotted the open bar and rushed towards it.

“Thank fuck,” he mumbled to himself rushing in the direction of the free alcohol. As he approached the bar, he became aware of a solitary person, a woman, sitting atop one of the barstools, her back towards him, drinking alone. She turned around as she felt him get closer, giving him a polite nod.

He nodded in return, flashing her a quick smile.

“What can I get you, sir?” the bartender offered.

Matty almost ordered a glass of wine, but, on a whim, he turned towards the woman instead, “what’re you having?” he gestured towards her glass.

“A Cherry lime tequila.”

“is it any good?”

She nodded.

Matty turned back to the bartender. “I’ll have what she’s having, please.” He sat at the other end of the bar, losing his battle against the tie.

Moments later, the bartender returned with Matty’s drink in hand. The woman watched, out of the corner of her eye, as Matty whispered a polite ‘thank you,’ and took a sip of his drink. She noticed his face scrunching as the drink pour down his throat.

“How is it?” She asked, pressing her lips together to hide her amused smile.

“G- uhh- good.” Matty lied. “I’m Matty, by the way.” He moved one bar stool closer.

“Claire.”

He smiled softly, thinking of the next thing to say.

“So…Claire, what’s your vibe?”

“My- vibe?”

Matty swore he could see her skin physically crawl. He giggled, embarrassed. “That- is the dumbest thing that I’ve ever said in my entire life.”

Something about the way that he could instantly poke fun at himself without looking self-conscious softened her towards him.

“Let me try this again. Like an adult: you hear for the writers’ charity thing?”

“I am.”

“Me too!” His tone was a bit more enthusiastic than he’d hoped. “I’m a songwriter.” He offered up, calmer now, adjusting his demeanor. “Never been to one of these things before. To be honest, I kind of hate them. Fuckin rich people trying to make themselves feel better about the dystopian world that they’re partly to blame for by hosting fuckin fundraisers and chairing charitable foundations.”

Claire took a sip of her half empty glass, nodding as Matty spoke.

“So, what about you. You a writer too?”

She smiled, “yeah, I am. Fiction, though.”

She could see a light flash across his face. He leaned in closer, “that’s fuckin cool. Anything I might have read?”

“No.”

Matty frowned at her immediate, emphatic answer. “Why- not? Are you not any good?”

“Oh, I am. I just…” she adjusted her feet underneath her, sitting up straight.

“Just what?”

“Just don’t think it’s the kind of fiction that you would read.”

Matty’s lips parted, ready for a retort, but none came. After a moment of silence, he finally thought of something. “You’ve only just met me. You don’t know what kind of fiction I read.” His tone has an edge to it, but he remained composed.

“Oh, but I do- guys like you- the hair gel, the

loose tie, the general aversion to formal settings…you probably read Jack Kerouac and Kurt Vonnegut, and, like, David Foster Wallace.”

“Ha! Jokes on you. I’ve never read Vonnegut.”

His response caught her off guard, making her laugh.

“But, yeah I’ve read On The Road….and yeah I like David Foster Wallace.”

She had a triumphant look on her face. “Pale

King?”

“No, Infinite Jest, actually.” Matty watched her expression shift again. His turn to feel triumphant.

“You’ve read all of Infinite Jest?” She whispered, as if the revelation were some kind of secret.

“Twice.”

She studied him closely, pleased with the unexpected turn of their conversation.

“And…” Matty took a sip of his drink. “For your information, I also like Joan Didion, and Virginia Woolf, and Flannery O’Connor.”

She giggled, taking Matty aback by the effect that the sound of her laughter had on him. He looked away from his drink instantly, eyes focused on her.

“So you’re saying you’re not a complete cliche?”

He nodded. “Well, what about you, then? What kind of fiction do you like?”

Her lips curved into a smile as she heard his question, she leaned in to meet him halfway, but before she could speak, a well-dressed member of the venue staff approached her and whispered into her ear, pointing to the watch on his wrist.

She nodded, turning back to Matty with an apologetic look. “I’m sorry, if you’ll excuse me, I- I’m afraid I have to go. It was a pleasure meeting you, Matty.”

For the second time tonight, Matty found himself speechless. He wanted to say something, anything at all, but when his lips parted, no sound came out. Instead, he watched her walk away, getting smaller and smaller the further she got away from him.

***

The rest of the night droned on as Matty attempted to make polite conversation with screenwriters, journalists, and authors of various kinds around his table. He couldn’t help pulling out his phone to check the time, every time there was a lull in conversation.

In front of him, the event organizer stepped onstage announcing that the last speaker of the night was up next. It would be the host of the fundraiser and chair of the organization, Claire Jones.

Matty’s head whipped around, looking up from his phone and watching as Claire took the stairs from the side of the stage, walking towards the lectern.

He recalled the snide comments that he’d made to her about his disdain for these kinds of events and the people who organize them. He felt embarrassed. She must think he’s a complete asshole. Unsure if he should be looking at her, or how to control his facial expressions appropriately, he decided he’d be better off staring at his shoes until her speech.

Matty thought that, realistically, her speech couldn’t have been more than a few minutes long, but it felt like ages. He struggled to even register her words as his own echoed in his head. He sat there, wondering if he should apologize, wondering if it mattered, if she cared one way or the other, and wondering why he cared so much.

The sound of applause filled the room, Claire Jones stepped off the stage, esteemed guests began to move around tables and mingle, shaking hands with each other, hugging, catching up, and exchanging numbers.

By the time that Matty had made his way to the other end of the room, Claire was nowhere to be found. He walked the perimeter of the room a couple of times, hoping to spot her, but when he failed to find her, he defeatedly meandered towards the exit, sticking his hand into his pocket and pulling out a pack of cigarettes and a lighter.

The nighttime breeze was merciful on his face. He hadn’t realized that he’d felt suffocated until he’d made it outside. He stood on the sidewalk, leaning against the building, smoking his cigarette. He was surprised to find himself disappointed that he’d never see Claire again.

#matty healy fanfiction #matty healy fic #matty healy x oc #matty healy x you #matty healy fanfic #matty healy smut #matty healy x y/n #matty healy x reader

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fallingforfictionalcharacterss · 11 months

Note

Hii!! I Hope you’re well, rn I’m watching Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows and I was a question if u can do a Draco x reader ( fluff) when Draco is going to kill Dumbledore and reader is here bc she wanted to ask a question to Dumbledore. For the rest of the story I trust you im sure u make a great story! Idk if u’re request are opens but I hope u’re understand what I want ( my English is not the best ) !! Bye and have a great day when u read that!

Ps : a happy end !! 💞

After almost half a year I finally finished this one as well, so thank you not only for your request but also for your patience. I feel like I might have screwed up the logic of some events since the scene is really complex and described quite detailed in the books as well as in the movies and I didn´t want to change too much of the plot. Also, I really tried to make the ending as happy as possible, but since the scene itself is quite angsty let´s just say the outcome is the best I could think of without making the story much longer and complicated than necessary. However, I hope you still enjoy this fic and go easy on me, I haven´t written anything in quite a while.

Happily ever after

Warnings: mentions of death / murder

Your eyes darted from the parchment in front of you to the books that were splattered across the table. The assignment about the history of the Cruciatus Curse was due by tomorrow and by now, you had only managed to work yourself through the chronicles until the declaration as unforgivable in 1717. You sighed in resignation as you flicked through the pages of the books, hoping to find anything helpful. But the results of hours of research were more than just disenchanting. Because even though Madame Pince had granted you access to the Restricted Section, details about the forbidden curses were still hard to find. The frown on your face only deepened. Why in Merlin´s name would the Professors give you homework about themes that were that hard to research? You came to the conclusion, that they probably just took pleasure in your misery; especially if said teacher happened to be Professor Snape, who -contrary to your hopes- didn’t go easier with you since he had finally gotten his dream job. Regardless of the Professor´s motives, however, you had to finish the essay, if you didn’t want to earn yourself a month of detention. So you let out a small sigh before you buried yourself deeper into the world of the one curse that made chills run down your spine more than any other.

But your state of concentration didn’t last long. Some loud voices abruptly got you out of your trance-like state. You blinked in irritation. You knew those voices.

“This is absolutely unacceptable! Intolerable!”

You knew immediately that this was the shrill voice of Madame Pince. Probably every student in here had been at some point the victim of her tirades, once she had caught a student doing anything that -in her eyes- just wasn’t done in a library. And the list of those things was sheer endless.

“I already told you, I have research to do.”

You knew that voice as well. But for now, you couldn’t identify it yet. You frowned as you put down your quill. You knew that you shouldn’t get distracted by that kind of nonsense that easily, but somehow, that conversation was just so much more interesting than the books piling up in front of you.

“About what?”

“I don’t think that´s any of your business.”

While you heard Madame Pince gasping for air, while she tried to process what the boy had just said to her in her sacred halls, something in your head clicked, increasing your curiosity. Because there was only one student you knew who would dare to talk to elders and betters like that. Silently, you got up from your chair and sneaked to the next shelf, glancing around the corner carefully.

Madame Pince had turned her back on you, so you couldn´t see her face, but what you could see was that her shoulders were shaking from anger. The blond boy who had caused her furious state was standing right in front of her, towering the elder woman for several centimetres. He had his arms crossed in front of his chest and the look on his face seemed rather unimpressed; almost bored.

“Get out!”, Madame Pince spat out.

“I don’t think you are in the position to tell me what to do.”

“I am not… This is the library, young man. My library. And as long as you are in here, I am the only one to tell you what and what not to do.”

“Oh yeah? Well, go ahead then. I am really curious what you want to do about it. Because I certainly won´t leave before my research is done.”

There was a dangerousness in the boy´s voice that send shivers down your spine. And not in the way his presence usually did. Something felt off about this. As if something bad was about to happen if the situation wouldn´t calm down any time soon. And you certainly didn’t want to find out what exactly this thing would be.

So you took a deep breath and -just as Madame Pince was about to answer- stepped out of the shadows of the shelves and walked up to the two squabblers with the sweetest smile on your face.

“Excuse me, Madame Pince. I didn’t mean to interrupt your discussion, but I think Draco is here for the same reason I am. You know, the essay for Professor Snape. We have to finish it until tomorrow and I…”

“Very well Mrs (Y/l/n), but I didn’t ask for your interference. I think Mr Malfoy can very well speak for himself as we all have just heard.”

You tried to widen your smile even more and looked at the librarian with doe eyes.

“I´m sorry Madame Pince. I just wanted to help out.”

The witch looked at you with narrowed eyes, her lips pursed. Then her gaze shifted to the Slytherin in front of her, who looked at the two of you with an indefinable look on his face.

“Is that the reason you wanted to get in here, Mr Malfoy?”, Madame Pince asked, her eyes piercing the blond boy.

He just nodded and mumbled something incomprehensible about Professor Snape and his research. The gaze of the librarian shifted between him and you, scanning you as if she could see all the way to the bottom of your soul. Even though you were aware of the fact that you had done nothing wrong, you still felt your hands getting sweaty and you gulped heavily as you tried to withstand her glare without lowering your head.

Finally, Madame Pince nodded slowly.

“Two more hours. Then I will lock this section up again. And Mr Malfoy” She glared at the Slytherin, who did a much better job in returning her gaze than you had done before. “The next time you will tell me about your projects yourself. Or I granted you access to this section for the longest time.”

Then the librarian turned on her heel, not without shooting you one last warning glance, and strutted down the aisle soundlessly, her eagle eyes probably already looking for her next victim.

When Madame Pince was finally out of sight, you turned around to the blond boy, who had remained rooted in his spot, glaring at you, offering him a small smile that you didn’t expect him to return, before you got back to your desk again, letting yourself fall onto your chair.

When not even two minutes later, you heard some footsteps behind you, you couldn’t help the small smile that crept on your face. Finally, the steps came to a halt right next to you. You didn’t even need to look up to know who was standing there. Even if you wouldn’t have saved him only minutes ago, you would have done so. By now, you recognized the sound of his steps as well as the smell of his cologne.

“Care to join me?”, you asked without tearing your gaze from the book in front of you, even though you hadn’t even read a single sentence of the pages.

A small huff escaped the boy´s lips before you felt his presence departing. Only when you heard the creaking of the chair on the opposite side of the table, you glanced up again, a small smile still playing around your lips. As your eyes met the grey ones of your counterpart, a few seconds passed, before finally one corner of the blond boy´s lips twitched upwards, not enough to actually return your smile, but enough that you knew very well he acknowledged it.

You shoved the book to the side, mirroring the behaviour of the boy in front of you, leaning back in your chair and crossing your arms in front of your chest.

“What? Got nothing to say?”, you asked.

Silence.

You sighed.

“Oh hey, (Y/n). Thanks for helping me out with Madame Pince. Because she probably would have kicked me out if it wasn’t for you, because I behaved like a complete idiot.”, you said in a sarcastic voice, as you rolled your eyes.

You could see the amusement glistening in the boy´s eyes as he raised an eyebrow.

“Why would I have to say something if you already think you know what´s going on (Y/l/n)?”, he smirked.

As soon as he had broken the silence between the two of you, you could feel the tension that had been hovering above you like a dark cloud ease and you felt yourself melting into your chair, while your counterpart did just the same.

The relationship Draco Malfoy and you had was strange. You wouldn’t say the two of you were friends -probably far from it-, still, in comparison to how Draco treated most of his other classmates, the two of you got along very well. You weren’t quite sure why, but ever since you had been paired up with one another in your very first year at Hogwarts, there was something like an unspoken tie between the two of you. You regularly paired up in your classes and often met up afterwards to study together. And even though you justified the time you spend with Draco with the fact that he was a brilliant student and every task you started with him was granted to be a success, deep down, you knew that it was more than that. Because in the Slytherin´s company, you found a strange kind of comfort that confused you yet made you long for more. And even though you had never talked about it -you barely talked about anything but your classes at all- you sometimes suspected that Draco might feel the same about you. Or at least that´s what you were hoping for. You didn’t know what it was but whenever you spend your afternoons in the library alongside Draco, while studying silently or getting all worked up in preparation for the next class, you experienced a sense of home, you had never felt when you were with someone else. He made you feel safe and his special kind of humour made you -if he wasn’t insulting everyone around him for once- laugh every single time.

“So am I right about it?”, you responded, mirroring the slightly haughty look on Draco´s face.

The boy sighed.

“If you weren’t – could I convince you otherwise?”

“I highly doubt that.”, you chuckled.

“That´s what I thought. But unfortunately, all your brilliance won´t help you the slightest if you won´t bring it to paper.”, Draco answered, as he glanced at the paper in front of you, fully aware that what you had written wouldn’t satisfy Professor Snape the slightest yet.

“I would have made much more progress by now if someone”, you glared at the Slytherin in front of you, “wouldn’t have felt the need to yell at the librarian.”

You noticed Draco´s grin falling from his face immediately as he ducked his gaze.

You frowned. This kind of behaviour wasn’t unusual for Draco in the last few weeks. Ever since the new school year had started, he was acting rather strange. He seemed to be absent-minded most of the time and was roaming around the castle with a look on his face that made you suspect that he was up to no good. Also, he was much more thin-skinned than ever. A year ago, you wouldn’t have suspected Draco talking to the staff at Hogwarts in the way he had just done to Madame Pince. He had always been rude towards people he considered below his dignity, but always clever enough to not provoke people who were higher up the food chain than he was. But since you had become a sixth grader, Draco didn’t seem to care as much about his reputation or the consequences of his behaviour anymore. You couldn’t exactly blame him though. You knew his father, who Draco had always seemed to be quite close to, had been sentenced to Azkaban, which obviously dragged on the boy´s nerves. However, you felt like there was more than met the eye to his behaviour, even though you couldn’t quite grasp it yet. And even though you couldn’t help but wonder about his strange behaviour, you had always told yourself that this was none of your business. But now that you saw Draco zoning out once more, his hands anxiously fiddling around with the tie around his neck, you couldn’t help but worry about the boy in front of you that somehow looked so different from the one who had taken his place in front of you only minutes ago, teasing you about your own behaviour.

“Are you… is everything okay?”, you asked carefully, scared that by asking this you might overstep the invisible boundary that the two of you had drawn in your relationship, that you had so often been tempted to overstep, but had never dared to, worried that this might shatter the fragile bond between you and the boy irreversibly.

But Draco didn’t even seem to hear you. He was still staring into the void, caught up in his own thoughts.

You hesitated for a moment before you called him out once more: “Draco? Did you hear me?”

As if he snapped out of a trance, Draco stared at you with widened eyes. For a moment, you thought you could see his gaze soften as he looked at you, seeing how you knit your brows in concern, trying to get at least the slightest idea of what was going on inside his head.

But the moment passed and the gentle confusion on his face gave place to the usual mask he was wearing when he didn’t want people to know what he was thinking.

“I think you´ll have enough problems on your own if you keep on chattering instead of finishing your paper (Y/l/n).”, Draco answered in his usual arrogant voice, even though he wasn’t able to withstand your gaze as long as usual.

“I didn´t… Just wanted to check on you.”, you mumbled, as you felt your cheeks heating up. What in Merlin´s name were you thinking?

“That´s not your job, you know? I mean, it´s not like we're best friends or something. Braiding each other’s hair and sharing all our secrets. We´re studying together because we know we can benefit from one another since apparently, we are the only ones with a decent amount of intelligence. That´s all there is, isn’t it?” If you wouldn’t have known Draco for such a long time, you would have thought that there was a pleading look in his eyes, silently begging you to contradict. To tell him that there was more to your relationship than the fact that your grades benefited from it.

But Draco Malfoy wasn’t one to beg for anything. Neither was he one who would tolerate it if one would disagree with him.

So you just nodded and pulled the book you had shoved to the side closer again.

“Then we should start working again now, shouldn’t we? I can give you the notes I made on the essay if you want me to.”, you said, forcing yourself to smile at the Slytherin as you tried to ignore the stinging in your heart you had felt at his words.

Draco blinked and looked at you in confusion.

“The essay?”

You frowned.

“The essay for Professor Snape. About the Crutiatus Curse? That´s why you wanted to get in here, didn’t you?”

Draco hesitated for a moment, his eyes flickering to the parts of the section that were lying in deep shadows, the parts, you didn’t dare to go and those Madame Pince had vigorously forbidden you to go to, before he looked back at you and gave you a short nod.

“Obviously it was. Wouldn’t have any other reason to get here, would I?”

You just nodded, before you shoved some of your notes over to Draco who gave you a thankful nod.

And for the rest of the evening, the two of you worked silently side by side, while you ignored Draco´s gaze lingering on you most of the time, just like he ignored the worried glances you threw him from time to time, as you wondered what was going on inside the blond boy´s head and why -if all you were were classmates- you still cared so much about it.

And over the next weeks, your worries only increased. Draco barely ever showed up to your study sessions and even in the lessons you shared with him, he was often missing. And if he joined you once, he would be absent-minded and make stupid mistakes, even though you knew he could do better. His grades obviously suffered under his strange behaviour but while the Draco you had known for several years, had always been anxious to be on top of the class, by now he didn’t seem to care at all. But not only his weird behaviour made you suspect that something was off more than ever. Draco also didn’t look as well as usual. It wasn’t like he wasn’t handsome and for some reason absolutely stupidly attractive anymore, but you could see the marks the changes in his life had left on him. His pale skin looked almost translucent, and his cheeks sunken. There were dark circles under his grey eyes, and while you had often secretly admired the silvery childish sparkle, he had held within them, by now they looked apathetically as they flickered through the room as if he was expecting a threat coming up to him any second, while his hands fiddled on the rings covering them the entire time.

By now, in the study sessions with Draco, he made you almost lose your mind. Because you were dying to know what was going on with the boy, but whenever you brought up the topic even the slightest, the Slytherin brushed you off in a rude way. Plus, while on the one hand you somehow still enjoyed spending time with Draco and were -regardless of his behaviour- under the impression that he might do so the same from time to time, on the other hand, you barely made any progress when you were working with Draco, and especially that shortly before the final exams, you couldn’t allow your grades to drop as well. But while most of the other people would by now probably have given Draco up, this only fuelled your determination to make not only yourself but also Draco pass the exams at the end of this school year. And from time to time, your volition seemed to pay off, because sometimes -even though it happened rarely- Draco seemed to be able to forget whatever was troubling him these days and was finally able to relax again, sometimes even breaking you a small smile that never failed to make your heartbeat quicken as you would return his smile without thinking about it twice. And whenever he did so you swore to yourself that, as soon as the exams would be over, you would dedicate your entire attention to helping Draco deal with whatever troubled him – whether he wanted you to or not.

You sighed in resignation as you looked at the pile of notes in front of you. The upcoming N.E.W.T exams stressed you out even more, now that they were just around the corner. Once more, it was Defence Against the Dark Arts, you struggled with the most. Not because you didn’t understand the tasks, but because whenever you thought you had finally understood the issue, ten other questions popped up in your head again, leaving you even more confused than you had been before. That wasn’t unusual to you, but in the other classes, your teachers were happy to answer every single one of your questions patiently until you were finally contented. Professor Snape however wasn’t exactly delighted whenever you would come up to him with yet another question and by now he had threatened you to dock some points from your house if you would ever do so again. And you had no doubt that the teacher would actually do so, so you tried to keep all your questions to yourself. But whenever you did so, your head felt as if it was going to explode any second, making you feel, like you didn’t even understand the essentials.

But suddenly, another idea came to your mind. Over the last few weeks, there had been another Professor who had, when he had noticed how much you were struggling in this class, sat down with you and patiently answered all the questions you had, no matter how long it took. And Professor Dumbledore certainly knew everything about the class he once used to teach himself, even though by now, this was decades ago. Plus, he always seemed to be delighted by your unquenchable thirst for knowledge, happily answering every single of your questions in as much detail as you wished for.

You had halfway gotten off your chair already when you stopped and took a look at your watch. It was already late at night, far after curfew. You knew that Professor Dumbledore wouldn’t hold it against you if you would be out of bed that late, fully understanding the pressure that was on you shortly before your exams. However, if one of the other teachers -or even worse Filch- would catch you, you would most likely get in trouble. But then again you knew that you wouldn’t be able to fall asleep before at least some of your questions would be answered and after all – if the headmaster wouldn’t mind it if you would pay him a visit, how could the other teachers do so?

So you grabbed a parchment and a quill and made your way out of the common room and to Dumbledore´s office.

When you had finally gotten to the office without any incidents, you came to a halt in front of the ugly gargoyle, that guarded the entrance. It had its eyes closed and seemed to be asleep already. Nervously, you shifted from one foot to the other before you cleared your throat. The gargoyle lazily opened its eyes and stared at you.

“I… I´m sorry to wake you up, but I would like to talk to Professor Dumbledore.”

A few seconds passed while the stone figure just eyed you. Then finally, it opened its mouth and spoke in a heavy voice: “The Headmaster isn´t here.”

You nodded.

“Okay and… Do you know where I can find him?”

Once more the gargoyle took its time to answer.

“Astronomy Tower.”, it said, before it closed its eyes again, and froze in its movement.

“Well, thanks then.”, you mumbled, before you turned around on your heel and walked towards the Astronomy Tower.

You weren’t quite sure what it was, but while you walked down the empty corridors of the castle, something felt different than usual. You felt shivers running down your spine as your steps echoed through the castle far too loud at the deathly silence that surrounded you.

But even though you felt as if your steps could be heard in the entire castle, no one showed up to see if everything was in order. It felt like no one was in the castle but you. Obviously, you knew that this wasn’t the case. Most people were simply asleep by now and Filch was probably somewhere on the other side of the castle. And even though you were aware of that fact, just as much as you were aware that the castle was just the same as hours ago when the sun hadn’t set already and there were still loads of students running around in the hallways, you felt like you had dived into a different dimension; one where it was important -maybe even lifesaving- to keep a close eye on your surroundings. And so you did as your steps got faster, aspiring to finally reach your destination.

When you had almost reached the Astronomy Tower, you suddenly heard a loud bang, followed by screams. You turned around quickly, turning your head to all sides. You could feel your heart pumping inside your chest quickly as you eavesdropped into the silence. You could still hear some voices, but they all sounded muffled. You took a deep breath and tried to calm down again. Probably some other students were still out of bed as well and had been caught by one of the Professors or someone had made fun of scaring their friends. But whatever it was, it still sounded far away.

You got a grip on yourself again as you accelerated your steps and hurried up the steps of the Astronomy Tower.

When you stopped in front of the wooden door that was the entrance to the platform you suspected the headmaster was on, you were panting. You took a few moments to catch your breath again, not willing to be a stuttering mess in front of the Professor. But when you finally raised your hand to knock on the door, you froze. For some reason, you had assumed that Professor Dumbledore would be up here on his own, but behind the door, you could hear some voices, even though you couldn’t understand what they were saying.

You hesitated. You didn’t know who the Professor was up here with, but given the time and place of the meeting, you assumed that they wanted to be undisturbed. And even though Dumbledore had already helped you out several times before, you highly doubted that he would be delighted if you would interrupt an important meeting with your stupid little questions. On the other hand, you also didn’t want to get back down there, since the strange feeling in your gut only grew stronger with every second and every fibre of your body was screaming at you not to leave yet. Following a strong intuition, you weren’t quite sure where you had gotten it from, you took a deep breath once more and knocked on the door.

When you pushed the door open, a greenish shimmer fell through the crack in the door. A shiver ran down your spine. You blamed the cold air of the night, tried to ignore the nagging feeling in your stomach, as you opened the door completely and took a step on the platform.

“Professor Dumbledore?” Your voice sounded a bit shaky. You straightened your back as you took another step forwards. “Professor? I´m sorry to interrupt. I know it´s already late but I have some questions regarding the…”

You stopped in the middle of the sentence. Because the person who was staring at you with widened eyes wasn’t Professor Dumbledore.

“Draco? What are you…”

Once more you interrupted yourself mid-sentence, as you finally took in the entire scene.

Draco had frozen in place as he had noticed you. His head had turned in your direction, his eyes were fixed on you. He seemed to have completely forgotten where he was or what he had been about to do before you had disturbed him. Because only moments before his attention seemed to be on someone else. Your eyes wandered down Draco´s extended arm, his hand that was clenched around his wand, as it shook vigorously. Your gaze followed the imaginary line you drew from Draco´s arm and finally settled on the second person that was on the platform.

The gargoyle had been right. Professor Dumbledore was up here indeed. He leaned against the barrier of the platform, his body slightly sunken down as his hands clenched around the parapet, trying to keep himself up, his eyes were halfway closed. But while this picture of your headmaster itself would have already been concerning enough in any other situation, right now, you barely even noticed it. Because as soon as you had taken in the entire situation, your eyes darted back at Draco´s wand that was aimed at the Professor´s chest.

“What in Salazar´s name are you doing here?” Draco´s voice sounded strange and hollow, almost like it wasn’t his, even though he tried to stride his usual arrogant tone. But you could hear his voice shaking just like the rest of his body did.

“I was… I just wanted to…”, you stuttered. “Forget this, what are you doing here?”

You stared at Draco who had by now lowered his wand by a few centimetres, even though it was still pointing at your headmaster.

For a moment, Draco looked as if he asked himself the very same question, but in the next, he straightened his back and looked at you coldly.

“That´s none of your business, (Y/l/n). Just leave and… forget what you´ve seen here.”

You looked at Draco in disbelief. Draco wasn’t stupid by all means, but even if he would have been he couldn’t actually think for the split of a second that you could ever forget the scene in front of you. Especially as long as you didn’t know yet what exactly was going on.

“You can´t seriously think that I would leave you like this, can you?” You stared at Draco, who had some difficulty to withstand your glare. “So tell me, what is this all about.”

When Draco didn’t answer, you turned around to the Professor, still leaning against the barrier.

“Professor?”, you asked, in a much more quiet voice now. “Professor, could you tell me… Would you mind explaining to me what is going on here?"

For a moment, you thought that Dumbledore hadn’t even heard you, but then, without even opening his eyes, he said: “Oh, young Mr Malfoy and I are just having a talk about his future prospects.”

Even though his voice was weak, and Dumbledore wasn’t looking fine at all, he still managed to strike his usual chatty tone. Draco turned his head, looking at the Professor flabbergasted, confirming your suspicion that this wasn’t the entire truth. But right now, you couldn’t quite tell if Professor Dumbledore was just joking, lying to you or in such a bad constitution, that he simply wasn’t able to think straight anymore.

“Professor… Are you… Are you alright?”, you asked carefully as you eyed the headmaster. “Should I get someone? Maybe Madame Pomfrey or…”

“I really appreciate your concern Mrs (Y/l/n), but I don’t think we should involve more people than necessary in this little encounter.”

“Are you telling me to leave or…”

“I fear that this isn’t advisable, is it?”, Professor Dumbledore said. Finally, he opened his eyes and looked at Draco whose gaze flickered between you and the Professor in short distances. “If I am informed correctly, some Death Eaters have gained excess to the castle ground and even though I am positive that the members of the Order of the Phoenix will be able to cope with this inconvenience, I don’t want one of my students to bump into them.”

The professor smiled at you as if he had just told you about the arrival of an unbeloved cousin at a family gathering. You looked at him with widened eyes.

“Death Eaters? But Professor you have to.. we have to… I mean, what happened? How did they get in here? Is there anything I can do to help?”

“A very interesting story indeed. But I´m afraid we won´t have enough time to discuss the details of it right now.”

“So what do you want me to do, Professor? Please tell me.” Your voice sounded pleadingly as you looked at the headmaster who looked so different from how you used to know him. Professor Dumbledore had always appeared strong and confident, solid as a rock, but right now he looked so fragile. For the very first time, you didn’t see the powerful wizard, but the old man Dumbledore was as well.

Suddenly, the muffled sounds that were nearly drowned by the howling of the wind on the platform got louder and louder. By now you could recognize the screams and sounds of explosions as the combat sounds they were. Professor Dumbledore closed his eyes again and sighed heavily.

“I don´t think I can take the responsibility of sending one of my students down there to fight. So even though the atmosphere up here is a little tense right now, I suggest that you stay until we…”

“She can´t stay!”, Draco interrupted the headmaster forcefully. “She has to leave. I still have to obey the wishes of the Dark Lord and…” His voice broke, but still, Draco raised his wand again, pointing directly at Dumbledore´s chest.

Your thoughts were racing. Logically, you had a slight suspicion of what was going on here, yet your heart was screaming at you that this just couldn’t be true.

“Do you really want to send your friend down there, Draco?”, Dumbledore asked, as if he was actually interested in the boy´s opinion on this debate.

“She isn’t my friend.”, Draco spit out.

Even though there were many many more important things right now, you could feel your heart stinging at his words. You knew you weren’t, yet, having him saying this still hurt you.

“My mistake.”, Dumbledore said, with a faint smile on his lips. “I always assumed the two of you would get along very well.”

That´s what you had assumed as well. But once more, you were proven wrong.

Draco didn’t answer, as his gaze flickered from the Professor to you. He hesitated for a moment before he shook his head slightly.

“She can´t stay.” He locked his eyes with yours. There was a determination in his eyes you had barely ever seen before. “You can´t stay.”

“Seems like a stalemate then, doesn’t it?”, you answered.

“No, you don’t understand…”

“Exactly. I don’t understand. So better tell me what´s going on. What is this all about?”

Your voice sounded desperate, but you didn’t care. Because that´s what you were. You were desperate to know what was going on here, desperate for Draco to assure you that what was happening here wasn’t what it looked like. To assure you that the hushed rumours you had overheard in the hallways of the castle but never paid close attention to weren’t true.

“(Y/n), listen.” Even if Draco wouldn’t have had your attention before, by now he would definitely have had it. Because for the very first time he called you by your first name. It was a small detail, foolish to even pay attention to, but you just couldn’t help but notice. “This is about so much more than you can imagine right now. You have to get away from here. It´s dangerous and I can´t…”

Suddenly, some heavy steps rumbled up the stairs. You didn’t even know what was happening as you were pushed aside by an invisible force, as Dumbledore´s wandless magic pushed you into a corner and hid you behind some supplies used for the Astronomy classes. And before you could even protest, the door crashed open and some dark figures stormed onto the platform.

You remained frozen in place, trying to process everything that had happened within the last minutes, as well as the things that were still going on right in front of you. Your head was spinning, but through the haze of your mind, you caught up on some fragments of the conversation, enough to slowly put the pieces together. And as you carefully glanced around the corner, your suspicion was confirmed.

The people who had gained access to the tower were wearing dark cloaks; Death Eaters as you concluded. One of them you even recognized from the wanted posters, warning vividly against the werewolf with a strong affinity for children. Chills ran down your spine as you saw Greyback blacking his foul teeth, even more, when he took a step closer to Draco. But even though the blond Slytherin looked at the werewolf anxiously and firmly denied having knowledge of the fact that he would get into the castle tonight as well, the scene in front of you made one thing very clear. The way the four figures were talking to Draco, the fact that they hadn’t killed him yet and the fact that Draco´s wand still pointed at Professor Dumbledore´s chest, confirmed your worst fear. He was one of them. Draco Malfoy was indeed a Death Eater – or at least a confidant of them. You had known something had been off with the boy within the last months and you had known about the stories other people had told you about him, yet you had never fully believed it. How could the boy, you had spent so many hours with, had managed so many challenges with -and most importantly the boy who had been able to make you forget the rest of the world and just feel safe in his presence-; how could that boy had actually turned to the dark side? You bit your tongue until you could taste the metallic flavour of your own blood, as your thoughts were racing.

But now wasn’t the time to get distracted by the aching in your heart, when you thought about all your hopes and dreams regarding Draco splattering right in front of you. You had to shove aside all the memories of what had happened in the past and thoughts about what could have happened in the future and get your head straight again. Because what mattered the most now was the fact, that Professor Dumbledore was in grave danger – regardless of whether Draco would actually be able to fulfil the wishes of You-know-who or not. You tried to take a deep breath to stop your heart from beating way too fast and to prevent your hands from shaking. Centimetre for centimetre, your hand wandered to the pocket you kept your wand in, mentally preparing yourself to grab it immediately if any of the Death Eaters would actually try to attack Dumbledore. Deep down you knew you wouldn’t stand a chance against all four -no, five- of them, and you also knew that Dumbledore wouldn’t want any of his students to put their own lives in danger to save him; but what kind of human would you be if you wouldn’t even try? And maybe -just maybe- the Professor and you would stand a chance against the others. Dumbledore was obviously weakened, but he was still one of the most powerful wizards in the world. Plus, you had a moment of surprise on your side. And also, against all the odds, you still silently hoped that Draco might help you, once he realized you stood a chance. Or that he at least wouldn’t fight you. You vividly remembered the shock on his face when he had realized what you had gotten yourself into. How worried he had been about you, not wanting to get you hurt. At that moment, you had been sure that he actually cared about you – maybe more than you had ever thought he would and so much more than he had ever admitted. And if he only cared about you the slightest, he wouldn’t fight against you, would he? But then again, could you actually compete with the longstanding influence Draco had been under for his entire life, forcing him into thinking that whatever these people were up to right now was the right thing? You would most likely find it out soon because the situation on the platform grew more and more intense. Your hand was only centimetres away from your wand, your fingertips almost touching it. You were ready to fight. Ready to defend the Professor and…

Suddenly another person entered the platform. As he stepped out of the shadows, you breathed out in relief. Even though Professor Snape for sure wasn’t one of your favourite professors, you knew that he was loyal to Dumbledore. Maybe everything would be fine after all.

But while you just were about to relax again slightly, everything happened all at once; way too fast for you to process, yet you felt like time went by in slow motion. One of the cloaked figures approached the Professor, telling him Draco apparently wasn’t capable of executing the sheer impossible. As your eyes shifted to said boy, you could see the forlorn look in his eyes, as he looked at his favourite Professor, as if he was hoping he would be able to take this burden off his shoulders. But if Draco was hoping that Professor Snape would be able to help him and the Death Eaters didn’t attack him but talked to him like an old friend, didn’t that mean that…

But at the very same time, someone else spoke up, his voice weak and pleading, a sound that made shivers run down your spine, as Dumbledore looked up to his confidant and whispered: “Severus.”

Professor Snape´s cold eyes landed on the headmaster still leaning against the parapet. And for the first time since you had known him, the emotions the potions master felt were clearly written on his face, which was distorted to a mask of hate and disgust, as he shoved Draco to the side, who stumbled backwards, finally dropping his wand. The Death Eaters stumbled back as well, all eyes fixed on the Professor, as he came to a halt in front of Professor Dumbledore.

“Severus…”, Dumbledore´s eyes flickered through the room for a moment, coming to a halt on everyone on the platform, then a bit longer at a blank spot near the door, before they landed back on the Professor. “Please.”

As Professor Snape raised his wand, his hand was calm, as well as his voice, when he voiced the words: “Avada Kedavra.”

A green light flashed through the room, the flash hitting Dumbledore right in his chest. You saw the headmaster´s expression changing to a look of something that -in any other situation- you would have described as curiosity or maybe even pleasant surprise. But you couldn’t be sure, because it only lasted for a second, before the force of the lightning that had strutted him, made the Professor stumble backwards, until his back hit the barrier, making him lose his balance and tip over backwards. And the last thing you could see was a sparkling of his crescent-shaped glasses before the void of the night swallowed the professor.

The scream of terror was barely muffled by your hands pressed in front of your mouth. The Death Eaters however didn’t hear it, since it got lost in the sound of their laughing and cheering. Draco however seemed to have heard it, because while he had watched the entire scene with widened eyes and frozen in place, he now turned around, his eyes landing on you, as you remained pressed to the wall behind you, hands still covering your face, your eyes probably just as widened in horror as Draco´s. Time slowed down as the two of you just stared at each other and you felt a strange calmness washing over you, given the fact that he would most likely kill you on the spot after what you had just witnessed or at least tell one of his new found friends to do so.

But nothing like that ever happened. Draco just kept on looking at you, as if he was just as hypnotized by you as you were by him. Only when Professor Snape turned around on his heel, walking up to Draco, grabbing him by his neck, trying to force him through the door, Draco swayed slightly but didn’t react any further. And when Snape´s gaze followed Draco´s and his cold gaze finally settled on you, you knew you were screwed.

Your professor stared at you, his gaze by now as unfazed again as it usually was. By no means anyone who would look at him now would have guessed that this man had just murdered someone not even a minute ago. And you would be his next victim. Because if Snape was capable of murdering the headmaster, who was -no, had been- not only one of the greatest wizards of all times but also one of the people who you had always thought was the closest to the Professor; what would he then do to one of his students he barely knew and probably didn’t even like that much? You let your arms sink down slowly, ready to grab your wand and fight. You most likely wouldn’t be able to fight your way out, probably wouldn’t even be able to take down just one of them, but you knew you owned it Professor Dumbledore to at least try and fight and maybe even scar his murderer for life.

So you continued staring at the Professor, ready to defend at least his first attack. But then, Professor Snape turned around to Draco and looked at him vividly.

“We have to leave.”

Draco didn’t answer.

“Do you hear me? We leave. Now!”

When the boy still didn’t react, Snape tried to shove him out of the room, but Draco shook his arm off, his gaze still fixed on you. Snape´s gaze flickered from the boy over to you, and back to him. Then, he leant down, whispering something into Draco´s ear, who just nodded, never taking his eyes off you.

Snape turned around to the Death Eaters, who were too occupied celebrating their victory to notice what was still going on on the platform.

“Let´s get out here.”, he said, making sure all of them obeyed and had left the platform before he went through the door as well, shooting Draco one last glance, before he went down the stairs.

You remained frozen in your spot; just as well as Draco. A few seconds passed before Draco finally opened his mouth.

But before the first word could even leave his lips, suddenly you heard a strange noise on the other side of the platform. You turned your head, your hand grabbing your wand, ready to defend yourself, as Draco did just the same. Perplexed you watched, how all of the sudden, Harry Potter appeared in the corner of the room, not even shooting Draco or you a single glance before he sprinted through the door. And as he flew down the stairs you could hear how his voice was filled with just as much anger as pain as he shouted: “Snape!”

For a moment your eyes remained glued to the empty door Harry had left behind, as he had taken the chase, but then you suddenly remembered that you weren’t on your own yet. You quickly turned around to Draco, who, as he heard the small noise of your shoes on the floor, turned around again as well, as he looked at you almost confused. The boy still looked terrified, but as he saw you standing there, your back still pressed against the wall, panting, eyes widened in terror and a tight grip around your wand, his gaze softened slightly.

“(Y/n), I…”, he spoke up, taking a step towards you, but you just pressed into the wall behind you further, raising your wand.

“Don’t come closer.”, you whispered as you eyed him distrustfully. Because even though there was a small voice in your heart that was telling you that Draco would never hurt you, the facts definitely told you differently. The fact that the boy who had been about to murder someone only minutes ago and apparently was working together with the worst wizard of all time was now looking at you almost caringly and his voice sounded as soft as you had never heard it before, made him not seem like a classmate or even friend who cared about you, but more like a psychotic maniac. And the fact that he still had his wand raised, didn’t make the entire situation better.

“(Y/n), please let me…”

“No!”, you cut him off again. “Don’t come closer to me or I swear to Merlin, I´ll kill you.”

Draco gulped heavily.

“You wouldn’t.”

“I would. Better you than me.”

But deep down you knew that Draco was right. You weren’t a murderer. You weren’t capable of taking a life, especially one that you had been stupid enough to care about so much and a part of you still did care about. But still, you wouldn’t be foolish enough to let down your guard, making it even easier for Draco to take you down.

“I won´t hurt you. I… I couldn’t.”, he added in a low voice.

You didn’t answer, your eyes flickering down to his hand still clenched around his wand. You almost laughed. It was just ironic that the boy who was pointing his wand at you after you had seen what he was capable of was now trying to calm you down. How were you supposed to believe him?

And Draco seemed to realize this as well, because as his gaze followed yours, he quickly lowered his wand, before he tucked it away tightly, in a way that would make it hard for him to reach it fast enough to attack your surprisingly, but which would it also make it harder for him to defend himself if you should decide to attack him.

“Please… I can explain this. It´s not…”

“Oh, don’t tell me it´s not what it looks like. And there´s no need to explain anything. I think I already understand very well.”

“No, I swear to Salazar, you don’t.”

“Oh, so you didn’t sneak up here to…”, Your voice threatened to break as the pictures of the last moments of your headmaster flashed in front of your inner eye. You closed them for a moment, trying to get rid of the memories before you continued: “To kill him for your boss? And you didn’t help your Death Eater friends to get in here and help you? You didn’t willingly take the risk of your schoolmates -your actual friends- getting hurt, just because you´re not a man enough to do something like that on your own?”

“I didn’t want anyone to get hurt.” Draco´s voice sounded weak.

You laughed bitterly.

“So you thought they´d just knock on the door nicely?”

“I didn’t have a choice.”

"You always have a choice. We all do. But you are just too selfish to understand what it means to care for other people and to take the risk to…”

“He would have killed my family!”, Draco interrupted you vigorously. For the first time when he looked at you, you didn’t only see sorrow in his eyes, but defiance. “He told me he would kill everyone I love, starting with my mother. And as soon as he would have taken it over, he would get my father out of Azkaban and kill him as well. And then he would come here and end it with all of my friends, so don’t you dare to tell me that I´m selfish.”

You looked at the boy, mouth slightly agape. And as you saw him standing there, panting heavily, with a wild look in his eyes, you couldn’t help but for some reason believe him.

“But why… why didn’t you just ask for help?”, you asked, by now not nearly as furious as you had been a minute ago.

Draco let out a bitter laugh.

“Who do you think I could have asked? The old man?” He nodded in the direction of the barrier where Dumbledore had stood just before the betrayal by one of his narrowest confidants. His face looked hard as he said those words, yet his voice shook slightly as he mentioned your headmaster. “He didn’t even understand that Professor Snape had fooled him for years. Do you really think he would have been able to protect me and everyone else?” Draco shook his head. “I had to rely on myself with this. I might have had a choice (Y/n), but the price was too high to pay. Don’t tell me you would have done it any other way.”

You remained silent, not able to disagree with Draco. The mere thought of someone threatening to kill your family and all your friends was enough to make chills run down your spine. If the threat would be credible enough -and you had no doubt that You-know-who was an expert in this- you probably would have acted in the same way as Draco had done. To judge him for his actions wasn’t on you for sure. Also, in the end, Draco hadn’t been capable of fulfilling the wishes of his master and actually murder the professor. And probably not only because Snape pre-empted him. Draco had had plenty of time to kill the headmaster on his own, but he hadn’t done so. Even when the Death Eaters had come up here, he still hadn’t taken the wheel and had even lowered his wand – or at least that´s what you thought you had seen.

You took a deep breath and looked at Draco. By now he had buried his hands deep in his pockets and looked at you in a challenging way, yet he looked as if he was afraid of your next actions. Because in the end, now everything was on you. In the end, he was up to your mercy. If he actually wouldn’t hurt you, it would be on you to decide what you would tell the people down in the castle, who would most likely show up here any second, at least those of them who didn’t took the chase with the Death Eaters, or if you might forget some certain details that might bring Draco into a position that would be rather difficult to explain.

But to make a final decision, you needed to know one last thing. You took a step closer to Draco, who had by now lowered his gaze but glanced up at you shyly as he heard your steps.

“Would you… Could you have done it? Could you have killed him?”, you asked in a low voice.

Draco hesitated for a moment, before he shrugged his shoulders, avoiding your gaze. But this wasn’t an answer that would satisfy you and the Slytherin seemed to realize it too, because a few more moments passed before he sighed. When he spoke up again, his voice sounded more vulnerable than you had ever heard it.

“I am not a murderer.” He shook his head slightly yet determined. “I am not.”

And even though he hadn’t answered your question directly, it still was everything you needed to know.

You nodded and relaxed your tensed shoulders slightly.

“Then we should probably get down there and tell everyone what happened.”

Draco gulped heavily, but he didn’t contradict.

“We will tell them how some Death Eaters found their way into the castle and how they outnumbered Professor Dumbledore and how Professor Snape... How Professor Snape betrayed him and… and murdered him. And how they left together and how all we could do was watch.”

Draco´s gaze shot up and he looked at you with widened eyes.

“But that´s… (Y/n), that´s not what happened. You know that just as well as me.”

As you looked at the boy in front of you, all the memories of the last six years flashed through your mind. Every single one of Draco´s cruel jokes and actions, all his beliefs that he had never been afraid to voice and act on. All of this just as well as the moments when Draco hadn’t been this product of his environment but you had seen his true self shimmering through. All of the things you had been through, all of the hard work that still had felt so effortless when you had done it with him. All the afternoons you had spent in the library, all the glances and rare smiles you had shared over the years that had told you so much more about the boy in front of you than any words ever could. A small, sad smile crept on your lips as you returned his gaze.

“I mean, I don’t know about you, but I obviously don’t know any details about what happened, since I hadn’t been involved in all of this. Were you?”

The hint of a hopeful smile showed on Draco´s face, but it dropped again as soon as it had appeared.

“But Potter knows the… he knows more than you.”

You bit your lip and nodded. You didn’t know where Harry was and you sincerely hoped that he would be just fine, but the fact that he knew certain details about what had happened might become a problem. A problem for Draco. But also for you. Because for some reason, you didn’t want anyone to ever know the truth. Or at least for now. Because you didn’t want Draco to get expelled, or worse, sent to Azkaban for what he had done -or more precisely had needed to do. And not only because there was a part of you that was screaming at you to not let him go. Because you for some reason felt safe with him. Because for some reason you knew that you needed him here and because you were scared of what would happen to him if he would leave. However, you also knew that this wasn’t what Professor Dumbledore would have wanted for him. The headmaster had always loved his students dearly and had always been ready to protect them. And if you had understood it correctly, he had been willing to help Draco out of his misery until the very last second. You knew that Dumbledore wouldn’t have wanted Draco to face a dark fade and that he had still believed in him. And if no one else was there to carry on this belief anymore, then you would be more than willing to be that person. Maybe this was just a way to justify your actions, but deep down you had a sincere feeling that Professor Dumbledore would have actually wanted this.

“I mean… Harry was in shock. After everything he has seen… And he already distrusted you, so it would have been easy for him to misinterpret this situation….”

But before you could continue, Draco cut you off harshly.

“No, (Y/n). I won´t let you do this. I mean, if we stick to the original story, you can say that I talked you into believing this version of truth. That I made you trust me. You don’t have to actually lie for this. But if you do it that way… That´s wrong. And I won´t let you do this and maybe even ruin your life just for me.”

“But I would do it. It´s a plan, Draco.”

You looked at the boy pleadingly, as he took a step closer until he was standing right in front of you and smiled down at you sadly, the unknown softness in his eyes almost making your heart melt.

“It might be a plan, but it´s a stupid one, love.”

“Well, you can´t tell me what to say.”, you said illiberally.

“And you can´t tell me either. So if you really want to go down this path, I will tell them the truth. And not your interpretation, but everything.”, he said in a voice, that was way too calm for the fact that he had just threatened to confess attempted murder.

“That would be stupid.”

Draco shrugged his shoulders.

“It might be. But I think it´s worth it if that means you won´t do something just as stupid.”

You looked at him with narrowed eyes and tilted your head slightly.

“Why do you even care?”, you whispered, as you eyed the boy closely.

Draco hesitated for a moment, looked as if he wanted to say something, as his gaze grew even softer for a second, giving away so much more than you could understand at this moment, before he suddenly pulled back, his face hardening again.

“I don’t think we have time for this now. I need to leave before they get me.”

For a moment you felt slightly disappointed at the loss of his closeness, yet you knew that this wasn’t the right moment for those thoughts for many reasons.

“But where do you even want to go?”

Draco shifted from one foot to the other.

“Professor Snape told me about a place. I just need to apparate there.”

“You can´t apparate on school´s ground.”, you contradicted.

“The entire school is flapping right now. I can easily sneak out.”

“That´s the point. Everyone is on their feet. If someone sees you…”

“They don’t know what happened yet.”

“You can´t know that´s.”

“I´m afraid that this is a risk I have to take.”

“Let me join you.”

Draco looked at you as if you had completely lost your mind. Then he shook his head firmly.

“There´s no way. This is way too dangerous. You should just get back to your dorm and…”

“I won´t go there now for sure. I´ll join you, Draco. I won´t leave you alone now.”

Silence.

“Just to the border. I won´t even leave the ground.”

You crossed your arms in front of your chest and withstood Draco´s glance until the boy sighed in defeat.

“You won´t leave the ground. Not even one step. And if something happens, you get back right away. Promised?”

You nodded, even though you knew just as well as Draco, if it would all come down, you would break your promise anyway.

You tiptoed down the stairs of the Astronomy Tower. The silence that surrounded you was almost ghostly. As you wandered down the empty corridors, some broken glass that used to cover the windows to your sides crunched under your feed. Neither Draco nor you said a word, each of you lost in your own thoughts. You were still wondering if what you were just doing was the right thing. Because after all, Draco apparently had been the one to make all of this possible. But after everything he had told you; could you really blame him for what he had done? But then again; how could you be so sure that he had told you the truth? That he wasn’t just using you to get out of the castle safely? You already knew the answer, or at least your very subjective answer to this question. Draco had tried to protect you. He hadn’t given you away when the Death Eaters had come to the tower and he had stayed with you, rather than leaving with them, even though he couldn’t be sure that that wouldn’t be his end. And as you glanced at the boy beside you, lips pursed and hands still shaking slightly, while his eyes wandered around restlessly, you somehow knew that your choice was the right one. Suddenly, you heard a loud banging, not far from you. You flinched, immediately raising the hand that was clutched around your wand, while the other one intuitively reached for Draco´s. You were turning your head to both sides, eyes opened wide, searching for any potential threat, but no one was in sight, neither friend, nor foe. You soon started to relax slightly, as you looked at Draco, who returned your gaze, with the slightest grin on his face. Only then you realized that you were still holding on to him. As soon as the realization hit you, you wanted to let go, but Draco prevented you from doing so, by catching your hand again, intertwining his fingers with yours, while the grin on his face only widened. You couldn’t help the blush creeping on your cheeks as he looked at you. For the first time this night, you could see a small fraction of the sparkle in his eyes again, that you always used to adore so much. You knew for sure that your timing couldn’t be worse, yet you could feel the butterflies erupting in your stomach as his thump tenderly brushed over the back of your hand while his eyes never left yours. It felt like years, yet only seconds had passed until Draco finally broke the eye contact and cleared his throat.

“We should really leave now. It isn’t safe here.”

And even though you knew that he was right, you couldn’t help but feel slightly disappointed as Draco continued his way, yet you noticed that his hand still held on tightly to yours, making you feel like you would follow him to the end of the world if he would only continue doing so.

By now, you had almost reached the courtyard. Soon, Draco and you would have to say goodbye, and you feared this moment more than anything.

But just as you turned around the next corner, you suddenly felt a flash of warm light buzzing past you, only centimetres away from your ear and exploding in the wall behind you. And if it wouldn’t have been for Draco pulling you back, it would have hit you directly.

You stumbled against Draco´s chest, not even realizing what was happening, as Draco shoved you behind him, raising his wand, ready to defend you.

“Tonks, no! These are students!”, you suddenly heard a familiar voice. And Draco seemed to recognize it as well because he stopped his movements and carefully glanced around the corner.

And as you tiptoed to catch a glimpse over Draco´s shoulder, you sighed in relief. You pulled Draco, who remained frozen in place, around the corner and walked up to the people standing in the middle of the corridor.

“Professor Lupin!”, you called out, a small smile creeping on your face as you saw your favourite Defence Against the Dark Arts teacher standing there with a just as relieved smile on his face. He looked haggard and had a few scratches on his face, but apart from that, he seemed to be uninjured.

“Miss (Y/l/n), Mr Malfoy, are you alright?”, he asked, scanning the two of you with narrowed eyes for any injuries.

“We´re just fine.”, you nodded and forced yourself to smile once more, while Draco stood right next to you, holding onto your hand tightly, not daring to say a word.

“Sorry for that.”, the woman who had thrown the curse at you said with a wry smile. “Thought you were one of them.”

“Apparently Death Eaters have attacked the school.”, Lupin explained to you. The grin on his face was wiped away quickly at his words. “We don’t know how they came in here or what they want but by now they seem to be gone.”

You nodded.

“We saw them.”

“Have they seen you? Did you fight? Do you know if any of them are still in here? Is anyone hurt?”

You bit your lip and glanced at Draco, whose gaze was fixed on the ground.

“I think they are all gone, but Professor…” You took a deep breath. “There is something I have to tell you. Professor Dumbledore… I don’t know how… He is… Professor Dumbledore is…”

Suddenly you heard some loud voices.

“Remus! Tonks! Over here! Quick!”

The Professor turned around immediately. Then he looked at you once more with a grave expression on his face.

“Listen, I want the two of you to get to the Hospital Wing. We´ll meet there and you´ll tell me everything, alright?”

You were barely able to nod before Lupin and Tonks rushed in the opposite direction.

After they turned around the next corner, you turned around to Draco, who still didn’t move. His eyes looked suspiciously glossy and he didn’t dare to look up at you. You tucked his hand carefully.

“Let´s get you out of here.”, you said in a soft voice, as you waited for him to react. And soon, Draco obeyed, and you continued your way out of the castle.

Without any further interruptions and much too fast for your taste, you finally reached the border of the castle´s ground. In the dim light coming from the castle, you could barely see anything, but maybe it was better this way because if you would have seen the look on Draco´s face in any more detail than you did now, it would have probably broken your heart than it already did and you wouldn’t have been able to let him go after all.

For a few moments, you just stood next to each other, staring at the line, where the grass of the meadows morphed into the woods of the forbidden forest; the one place no student was allowed to go. But tonight, you would have overstepped any boundary if this would mean that you could just stay with Draco, making sure he would be okay. But you knew he wouldn’t let you, and somewhere deep down you also knew that this was for the best, even though you didn’t want to admit it.

Finally, Draco slowly loosened the grip he still had on you, until your arm was falling to your side again, feeling cold and useless without his touch.

“So, that´s it?”, you whispered into the silence, not daring to look at Draco yet.

The boy nodded, even though you couldn’t see.

“That´s it.”, he confirmed, trying to hide the shaking threatening to take over in his voice.

As you turned around to look at him and saw his silhouette tensing as his shoulders trembled, you felt your eyes starting to sting as you shook your head in denial. You knew that this was probably the only way, yet now, that it was actually about time for Draco to leave, you just felt like your heart couldn’t take it. How could you let him go if you didn’t know what was going to happen? Maybe if he would stay, if he would explain everything – maybe then there would be a happy end after all. But if he would leave now, there was no turning back, and you didn’t even dare to think about what might happen to him under the command of You-know-who.

“This can´t be it.”, you said. Your voice sounded desperate, as the tears forming in your eyes threatened to fall. “This can´t be the end.”

“This isn’t the end (Y/n). It´s just… it´s going to be different now.”

“I don’t want to lose you.”, you sniffed.

Draco stepped closer to you and cupped your face in his hands. By now he was close enough that you could see almost each of his details clearly, even in the dim light and through the daze of the tears.

“You won´t, love. I promise. I´m yours and I will find a way to get back to you. Whatever it takes.”

Even though you could feel your heart breaking, at the very same moment, you could also feel it beating faster.

“You´re mine?”, you asked with a small smirk.

Draco forced himself to return your wry smile.

“I´m all yours. I´ve always been. I´ve just been too much of an idiot to admit.” He let out a low chuckle before he grew serious again. “But as soon as I´ll get back to you, I´ll be whatever you want me to be.” He hesitated for a moment before he added: “If you want me at all.”

You tilted your head slightly, giving in to the feeling of his hand that was still cupping your cheek. Your eyes closed fluttery at the feeling of his warm skin against yours, but you opened them again and locked your eyes with his, not blinking once, as you returned: “I do.”

You could see a small smile playing around Draco´s lips at your words, and it only grew wider as you added: “And the only thing I want you to be is yourself. I always did and I always will.”

“Even after everything that happened tonight?” His voice sounded raspy, full of regret as he thought about how close he had been to losing it all tonight.

“Do you really think I got you out of there just so you can live your happily ever after without me?”, you tried to tease him, but even though Draco´s lips twitched upwards for a second, he remained serious.

“Couldn’t have it without you anyway, love.”

You smiled at him sweetly.

“That´s just what I wanted to hear.”

Then finally, Draco returned your smile, somewhat wholehearted, for a moment forgetting all of the trouble that lay behind him and ahead. And when his gaze flickered from your eyes to your lips for a second, you gave the boy a small nod, before he leaned closer, until he finally closed the gap between the two of you.

The feeling of Draco´s lips on yours let you forget everything else, as they slowly started moving against yours. His hands wandered from your cheeks to your hips, pulling you closer, while yours wandered up his chest and sneaked around his neck, with the very same intention. At this very moment, everything felt like it was just like it was supposed to be - as if nothing else mattered. You knew that whatever would happen next -whatever challenge you would have to face- as long as you knew that Draco was with you and you were with him, everything would just work out somehow.

After what felt like an eternity, you finally pulled back, panting heavily, but smiling brightly, nevertheless. Draco wrapped his arms around you, pulling you impossibly close, as he buried his face in the crook of your neck. You let out a comfortable sigh as you nuzzled your face into his chest, inhaling his intoxicating scent.

“I promise I won´t leave you, (Y/n). Even when I´m away, I´ll always be with you.”, he mumbled, his breath tickling your neck.

You nodded and hummed in response.

“I know.”

When you loosened your grip and took a step back, you saw Draco smiling down at you with so much admiration that you thought your heart might explode any second. But as you turned your head and looked at the castle, you saw some small lights somewhere in the distance, slowly coming closer.

“I think you should leave now.”, you said, smiling at Draco sadly.

The boy followed your gaze and nodded. He pressed a small kiss on your lips before he looked at you.

“Just promise me, you won´t forget me when I´m gone, will you?”

You nodded and smirked.

“How could I? You´ll leave all the homework Flitwick has given to us to me. I won´t forget that very soon.”

Draco chuckled.

“I hope you got some more pleasant memories with me now than doing homework.”

“I think I´ll be able to think of something.”, you smiled.

Draco nodded and returned your smile, before he took your hand into his larger ones, placing a ghostly kiss on your knuckles, making you shiver.

“Goodbye, my love.”, he said, before letting go of your hand and walking towards the woods. You watched him closely, wanting to take in every single detail about him for as long as you could.

And just when he had passed the border, you spoke up again.

“Draco? You will be okay, won´t you?”

The boy turned around to you again and smiled at you.

“Don´t worry, love. I got something worth to coming back to now.”

“You promise?”

“I promise. I´ll be back before you can even start to miss me.”

“Then you wouldn’t be able to leave at all.”

“I told you, I won´t leave. I´ll be with you. Always.”

You nodded. But there was still one thing left to say. One thing that you should have told the boy who meant so much to you, a very long time ago, and that might have changed things – at least between the two of you for the better.

“But Draco, just so you know I… I l…”

But before you could even finish your sentence, Draco cut you off.

“I know, love. This isn’t the time for this. But someday you will tell me and I´ll tell you too, and I swear to Salazar, I´ll never get tired of it, yes?”

You nodded.

“Yeah.”

A soft breeze blew through the trees around you, making you shiver. Draco smiled at you as you crossed your arms in front of your chest, trying to shield yourself from the cold. One day, he would be there, to do so for you; to protect you, not only from the cold but every harm out there. He just knew it and deep down, you felt it too. And for that reason, the smile on your face didn’t fade when your gaze wasn’t fixed on Draco anymore but on the empty ground, he had stood on only seconds ago, leaving behind the promise of a happily ever after for the both of you.

Taglist: @xodracomalfoyxo @marigold-morelli @army24—7 @lbhmoon @cappgyuccino @writingwitch007 @myomy0ss @tinafuentes @dmslvt @Slytherin4eva @foulkryptonitepeanut @chillcheesecake @pottertea

#draco malfoy #draco x reader #draco x female reader #draco x you #draco x y/n #draco angst #draco fluff #draco fanfiction #draco fic #harry potter #slytherin #fanfic #fanfiction

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imagines-by-cleo · 1 year

Note

I hope your illness gets better soon!! This is my first time requesting, and sorry my English is bad. It is not my native language.

I really like Miller from MGSV. So, I’m so happy that you write about him! Can I request a fic that the reader walks into Miller drinking alone, and he being drunk accidentally confesses to the reader?

Please take your time. Get well soon, and I hope you have a nice day🤗

Thank you so much friend! It's so nice to hear you enjoy my fics and it's great to get back into writing with these requests, I am grateful for every single one of them!

This ended up being super long and super fluffy but I had fun writing (cause omg I love Kaz) it and I think you'll like it too, idk if you wanted smut but that's what I wrote and if you want to avoid it you can stop after the page divider. I'm finishing these requests slow but I swear I am finishing them and I'm trying to make them worth the wait. I appreciate your patience but most of all I appreciate the time everyone takes to read these.

CW: Alcohol, whump, fluff, consent is sexy, nipple play, fingering, oral sex (fem receiving), masturbation, dirty talk, unprotected sex

The overwhelming stench of warm sake filled your nose before you even opened the door to Miller's office, telling you exactly how you were going to spend the rest of the night. As you stepped in you found the room covered in a cloud of smoke from a kiseru pipe while music from at least a decade prior played loudly.

"Master Miller?" You called, though he didn't answer.

There he was sitting behind his desk in a daze, half here and half in the 70s, not even noticing your presence until you snuck over and turned the record player off. Grabbing a nearby wastebin you made short work of clearing out the many bottles around the room, one of which was still in his hand as he tried to pour the last few drops directly into his mouth.

"We should get some tequila shipped in." He mused.

"We had some. You drank it." You said a little too bluntly, but he probably wouldn't remember if you were being rude.

"One time... Back in MSF I had to much tequila and... I don’t really remember but the guys told me they had to get me down from a table and put my pants back on." His expression would change every time he trailed off from looking like he could cry to trying not to bust out laughing, but it was nice to see a twinkle in those clouded blue eyes.

You held in a snicker while you listened, it might have been nice to see Kaz in his party days but you're sure you would have to do the same thing you did now only you would have to wrestle his pants back on and he would have two more limbs to fight you off with.

Speaking of, you looked around for his crutch but couldn't find it anywhere, it had a funny way of disappearing when Kaz was drinking. With a sigh you walked up to his chair and grabbed his arm to stand him up, he leaned into you when you put his arm around your shoulder to walk him out.

"Wait a minute." He held a finger up, then pointed it at the desk where his sunglasses were sitting, prompting you to take them and gently put them on his face before leaving.

"Happy now?" You asked, only getting a hum in response.

It was becoming routine to help him out like this, normally you didn't think twice about it but tonight there was something about the heat coming from his body and the faint sweet smell of smoke carried in his clothes that made you realize how intimate the situation was. It was somewhat against protocol to be this close with a commanding officer but maybe it had the potential to become more than that. It was hard to admit now, but that was part of the reason you came here tonight. Only you couldn't really ask him about his feelings while he was completely wasted, the least you could do was make sure he was taken care of.

Putting the thought away as you left his office you headed toward his room, it wasn’t far but it felt much longer with an entire man slumped over your shoulder. While you were struggling Kaz was having the time of his life, humming a song and occasionally mumbling the words out of tune.

When you got to his room you found it was both bare and a complete mess. No pictures or anything to decorate the dull grey walls, clothes were thrown haphazardly on the floor and unmade bed and the only window had blackout curtains drawn closed. You stepped carefully through the mess, trying not to let yourself or Kaz trip on anything that had been left around.

This was the first time you had actually been inside since he would stagger back in alone once you got him this far but tonight he had been drinking too much to even do that. Its not that it was any of your business, but after discovering how he lived you started to get worried.

"Hey, I noticed you've been drinking more since the Boss brought home those MSF soldiers that were wandering around. I hope it's not bringing back any unpleasant memories." You pointed out figuring your best shot at getting clarification was while he was like this.

For a minute as he got quiet you were worried he was about to get angry at you, but to your surprise he answered honestly. "No, they're good memories. But that's all they are."

Deciding not to press the issue further, you changed the subject. "Let's get you to bed."

"You take such good care of me, that's why I love you." He laughed.

"Yeah, right." You replied, it was a strange thing for him to say but you chalked it up to him being drunk.

Sliding out from under his arm you proceeded to stand him up carefully as he swayed side to side, pulling his coat off quickly before he tipped over completely without your help. A blush rose on your cheeks when you unbuttoned his shirt, maybe it wasn't completely necessary but you didn't want him just falling asleep in it. Hesitating a moment when you reached for his glasses, once you uncovered his eyes you noticed how they had been fixed on you as if he was looking for something.

"What is it?" You asked.

The hand threading into your hair and cradling the back of your head caught you off guard, before you knew it Kaz' lips were on yours. The taste of sake was still strong and his mouth was so warm, you put your hands on his broad chest but couldn't find the strength to push him back. He pulled away just to continue across your jaw and behind your ear, you shuddered at the feeling, wishing you could just give in to it.

"Kaz, wait." You interrupted.

He stopped almost immediately but he stayed where he was, whispering his confession into your ear. "I meant it."

"You're drunk." You replied, pushing him into a seated position on the bed.

"Come here." He told you before dragging you down onto his lap, his poor balance causing the two of you to fall back onto the mattress together.

His body fit perfectly against yours while he kissed you again, it felt so natural to have him hold you like this that you were tempted to just give in. The groan he made when he rolled his hips up into you vibrated through your whole body, making you gasp in response after feeling the hard bulge that pressed into your thigh.

You lifted yourself up and looked down at him, pushing a golden strand of hair away from his pink face revealing his half lidded eyes that locked with yours.

"We can't do this." You sighed, climbing off the bed. "Not tonight."

He grabbed your hand before you walked away, so he could request. "Stay with me at least?"

Staring at the door, you contemplated what you should do before answering. "I'll stay until you fall asleep."

A low snore from behind told you that would be sooner than you thought, you turned and found Kaz was already fast alseep. You smacked your palm to face in frustration, more upset with yourself for expecting anything different.

Did that bastard really just confess his love to you and then pass out drunk? At the very least you knew you had made the right decision to turn him down for now anyway, but this was going to make for a delicate situation the next day if he even remembered half of what happened. How would you even go about explaining it to him, and would he expect a reaction from you?

With a tired groan you looked around the room for something to tidy up and keep you busy while you pushed the important questions off until tomorrow.

An all to bright ray of sunlight shining straight onto his face woke Kaz up, muttering curses he squeezed his eyes shut while reaching for his glasses on the nightstand. He knew exactly where they were though he didn't remember setting them there, come to think of it he didn't even remember how he got into his room last night but he wasn't inclined to think too hard about it now.

He sat up slowly to not irritate his throbbing head or aching body, leaning on the wall as he staggered into the bathroom. There was a bottle of water and some seltzer waiting on the sink, he didn't bother to question who put it there, as far as he was concerned it was a gift from God.

After chugging his drink and splashing some water on his face Kaz stared in the mirror, questioning the actions that put him here once again, but all the regret in the world wasn't going to change the fact that he was going to have to get dressed sooner or later. Instinctively he looked around the floor for his clothes finding they were all gone, someone had neatly folded yesterday's clothes and set them on his dresser while the rest were put in the drawers. There wasn't much he remembered about the night before but he was damn sure he didn't do any of that and before he could wonder how they got there he heard a stirring across the room.

Kaz nearly jumped out of his skin when he turned to find you sleeping curled up in an armchair. Knowing you had been there all night answered the question of why his room was so clean, but he was starting to feel guilty for having brought you here in the first place.

He came up to you as quietly as possible, you looked kinda cute, laying there with the sun shining on your messed up hair as you softly snored. Kaz found himself wishing he woke up next to this in his bed rather than across the room. He watched for a minute noticing the way you had your arms wrapped around your body, you must have been cold, immediately he went to grab a blanket from his bed and draped it gently over you. A satisfied smile rose on his face while he watched you snuggle into the warmth, his hand lingered on your shoulder after tucking you in. Slowly your eyes fluttered open, still hazed and tired as you looked up at him.

"Did you get that water I left for you?" You asked.

"Yeah, I did." He answered, he should have figured that was from you.

"That's good." You replied while yawning, wiggling around to get comfortable. "Are you feeling okay?"

"I don't know why you're still worried about me." He laughed, it was strange the way you looked after him when all he could really do was bring you a blanket.

"Someone has to be." You answered, rubbing your eyes and makeing the dark circles under them more apparent. "Besides, you were pretty wasted last night."

"Right, I must have kept you up pretty late. Why don't you take my bed and get some rest?" He requested, reachingout to you. "Do it for me."

Kaz led you over to the bed just a few feet away while you staggered over half awake without even questioning him. He tucked you in again before turning to leave and get ready for for his day if it wasn't too late.

"I don't know why you stayed here and went through all this trouble." He mumbled, more to himself than anything.

"You told me to stay last night." You answered, to his surprise.

"I hope that's all I told you." He laughed.

"Well there was one thing..." You continued, sitting up, the words sendinga chill down his spine. "You made a move on me, you kissed me actually."

Kaz really shouldn't have been surprised, he knew he had feelings for you since the day he met you but he wasn't about to tell anyone. It was only a matter of time until something slipped out, especially when you were around so much. He spent those few precious seconds of silence racking his brain to try and remember what exactly he said and more importantly how to respond.

"It was kinda nice knowing you felt the same way, but I wish you'd told me when you weren't drinking; or maybe when we both were." You shrugged, looking up at him in this sweet innocent way that he just couldn't stand.

"Listen..." He started, taking a seat on the edge of the bed. "I appreciate everything you've done, in fact I'm in more debt to you than I like to think about, but don't you think you'd be better off spending your time doing something else? With someone else?"

"I like spending time with you." You answered, reaching for his hand. "And I don't mind helping out every now and then."

"I don't deserve someone like you taking care of me." He confessed, it felt harsh coming out but he couldn't just let you keep doing this.

He wasn't expecting you to say anything after that, much less turn his face toward you and kiss him. It was his last chance to push you away but he wanted you more than he should have and let you come closer.

When you broke off you whispered "Please, don't talk about yourself like that."

It was a little jarring to have you showing him affection like that, every nice thing you did confused him and he always felt guilty for wanting more but he never thought he was more than a burden to you. Knowing you really felt for him changed everything, and his heart pounded as he allowed himself to be vulnerable for just once.

You crawled over, straddling his lap before taking his sunglasses off. He wrapped his arm around you while you shared a deep and thoughtful stare for a good long while.

"I love seeing your eyes." You broke the silence.

He just had to kiss you after that, holding you tighter while his lips moved softly against yours. For a brief moment he felt your tongue touch his bottom lip, inviting him to to take the opportunity and explore your mouth with his own. He slid his tongue in deep and fast making you moan in surprise before simply allowing him free access to taste you. You pressed your chest into his without breaking the kiss, taking his hand and guiding it under your shirt to touch between your breasts and for a second he could feel your heart beating fast.

Circling one nipple with his thumb, he felt it perk up in his hand until it was stiff, that made it much easier to pinch and tease making you twitch in his grasp. He lifted your shirt up higher so he could pop the other nipple into his mouth, swirling his tongue around it and gently sucking.

While he was playing with your tits you unbuttoned your pants, doing your best to pull one leg out of them without climbing off his lap. Pushing him away just for a moment to take his shirt off before pulling him back against your chest, running your fingers through his messy hair while he continued.

Your other hand drifted down, exploring his chest and anywhere else that you could. Then you reached for his boxers, tugging at the waistband before he caught your hand by the wrist.

"Not so fast, it's my turn to take care of you." Kaz stopped you, he would have loved to get out of that increasingly tight fabric but he had plans fo you first.

"But I wanna-" You whined.

He cut you off. "Do I have to pull the commanding officer card?"

You giggled. "Maybe."

"Alright. Spread your legs as far as you can. That's an order." He told you before tugging your pants the rest of the way down, and your panties along with it.

Starting by running his hand across your folds, making sure you were good and wet before he teased your entrance. Sliding a single finger in and out slowly, he pulled it all the way out before stuffing it back in as far as it would go then curling it inside you.

"Ah! Do that again!" You cried out, prompting him to go faster.

You held on to his shoulders, leaning in to kiss his neck between desperate pants. Kaz sighed at the soft touch of your wet lips and the warmth of your quick breaths. Pressing the heel of his palm against your clit made you roll your hips into him. It wasn't long until he had you cumming all over his hand and squeezing his fingers tight, your whole body shaking as you gripped him tighter to keep your balance.

After your last few spasms he fell back onto the soft sheets, kneading his fingers into your thigh and guiding you to climb over until you were straddling his face. It was like you read his mind when you lowered yourself onto his lips, and he wasted no time licking up every drop of wetness that dribbled out of you. He groaned at the sweet sticky flavor of you, reaching his tongue into your core and swirling it around to taste more.

Taking notice of how your legs would flex and shake around him, he also noiticed he couldn't hear you making any kind of noise. Pausing and looking up he noticed you were bitting down hard on your bottom lip, most likely in an effort to keep quiet.

"Hey! Don't hold back. Let me hear it." Kaz ordered, slapping the inside of your thigh.

Moaning immediately in response you didn't hold anything back, even when the sounds you made weren't so dignified. Though every little noise from you went straight to his crotch and he could feel himself twitching in his boxers that were starting to get just a little too tight. It was hard not to get off with a sense of pride when he made you cum once with his fingers and again into his mouth, if you weren't completely numb yet you would have felt him grining like a maniac against your sensitive skin.

It was easy enough to toss you over onto your back, you were putty in his hands while he pushed your legs apart and situated your body just how he needed it. The whole time you looked at him with this hungry half lidded gaze, something more sensual than anything you'd see in a magazine.

"Haven't had enough yet?" He teased, making you shake your head.

The front of his boxers were a tented mess, his swollen cock leaking and begging to be touched. Kaz couldn't help bit give it a few strokes before he lined it up, throwing his head back in relief of finally getting some stimulation. The thought crossed his mind to just keep pumping and finish all over you, but something told him he could make you cum one more time.

Climbing over you and starting slow, only giving your overstimulated pussy few inches at a time. You made a low whine that made his cock twitch when his entire length was inside, you lifted your knees up to your chest, welcoming him in deeper.

Everything about you at this point was a dripping mess, and Kaz loved it. From the way your hair was tossed to the dazed look in your eyes, and how your tits still wet with his spit would heave with every breath. Having you bucking up into him still desperate as all hell was just cherry on top.

"Never thought I'd see you like this." He remarked.

"Get used to it." You teased between moans.

Every move he made seemed to elicit some new decadent reaction, the way you were gasping and moaning under him like he was taking the very air out of your lungs made his heart pound. He could only deduce that you were about to cum again and he adjusted accordingly, with a few harsh targeted thrusts that rattled the bed beneath you he had you babbling his name one last time while your thighs twitched and eventually went limp.

He was trying to keep his weight off of you by staying propped up on his arm, until you hooked your arms under his shoulders and pulled him down closer to you. Closing what little distance you had between the two of you had him sinking in even deeper, making him groan at the feeling of being completely engulfed by you.

"You feel so good." He panted, picking up the pace. "You're gonna make me..."

Kaz was about to pull out before you wrapped your legs around his waist, keeping him locked inside until it was too late. The warmth of your body burning him up and the sound of his wet skin hitting yours was getting to be more than he could handle. Pushing into you with a last few shallow thrusts, his pulse was racing and he even felt his knees twitch while he emptied inside of you.

There was no way of telling how long the two of you sat like that, he couldn't move or even think and you were still holding onto him for dear life. When he did eventually get some control back he kissed you deeply, only breaking of to suck in a little bit of air before pressing his mouth to yours again. When he pulled away you reached up and pushed the hair away from his face so you could see his eyes, not saying anything but but simply sharing a deep moment.

"I hope you weren't planning on walking anywhere today." He teased, still out of breath.

"You're lucky it's my day off." You replied.

"I guess I am pretty lucky." He chided, rolling off of you.

Something sharp poked into his side making him jump, he reached to see what the object was only to find his sunglasses now bent out of shape. Before he could even curse about it you took them out of his hand and put them on, making him laugh at the lopsided lenses only covering half your face.

"I guess you're not going anywhere without these." You commented.

"It's already too late to get work done anyway." He remarked.

"Oh no, we'll just have to stay in our big comfy bed for the rest of the day." You teased, voice dripping with sarcasm while you laid your head on his chest.

"That doesn't sound too bad." He laughed, wrapping his harm around you.

Laying there together, watching the sun rise higher outside and forgeting about work one soft sigh at a time. It was more than Kaz could have hoped for when he woke up with a hangover. He wasn't sure what he did to deserve this, but he'd have to figure it out so it could happen again.

"Hey..." You broke the silence when you looked up at him grinning. "Tell me that story about you getting drunk in MSF and taking your pants off."

"Wha- Who told you about that?" He stammered.

"You did." He should have known.

"Right, well anyway. This was back when we first got to Costa Rica and we found this little cantina by..."

While Kaz continued his story he thought about how he would normally feel about the old days, using the the anger he felt at the loss of his home and his comrades as a reason to go on and seek vengeance. All his life now was just looking in the past and only going forward to try and find a way to restore it, until now he felt that was the only way. Maybe it was time for a change. Hearing you laugh and smile at his stupid stories made him realize there was a possibility of a future and a new home, and it was all right in front of him.

#kazuhira miller #kazuhira miller x reader #metal gear solid #mgsv #mgsv kaz #mgs fanfiction #mgs fanfic #mgs x reader

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shutupheathersorryheatherr · 9 months

Text

”Captive heart”

Summery: You meet yeonjun when walking home one evening and a he’s “the perfect stranger” you’re instantly hooked and as it turns out, much to the both of your surprises so is he. After bonding over disappointments you decide to start a “friendship” that consists of more coupley things than the both of you can handle while still being able to call each other your friend. But A “wild passion that drives away the cold” is just what the two of you needed. So maybe this wouldn’t be so bad. Correction: it wouldn’t be so bad if the both of you weren’t drooling over the other person whenever you were together.

A/N: this fic is based on the song captive heart by Selena because I didn’t have any other inspiration but then I listened to this song and it all suddenly came to me lol. This as stated before in the release date post, it’s for the lovely @itz-yerin but I really hope everyone else who reads enjoys it! This fix MIGHT have a “lost scenes and epilogue” as sorta a part two in the future. warnings and info: strangers to friends to lovers but they’ve had a thing for each other since day one, cursing, some very mild angst, making out? I guess idk but they kiss a bit, mentions of “sobering up” but no mentions of actually drinking they were just really tired of that makes sense. Bad spelling and all around shittyness lmao If I missed something please let me know!!

~this is simply a piece of fiction. My imagination onto “paper. This is in no way is mean to be taken as an actual and real representation of anyone.~

••••••••••••••••••••••••

You’ve just fixed your shoe for what seemed like the thousandth time in the time you’ve walked from whatever place it was you had come from. At this point it didn’t matter when you saw him. The sun was setting so you didn’t want to take that long. But he made you brake your concentration on the walkway ahead in you. Eyes seemingly moving on their own as a man almost stomps lathargicly down the concrete steps of a small corner eatery. Head hung heavily and body swinging along with his steps like he was either half asleep or a piece of jello. He looked mildly disappointed as he raised his head. Running his fingers through his light hair, his hand stopping at the back of head as he turns his attention to you. A smirk appearing on his face, pulling his lips and eyebrows up like how you suddenly feel looking at him. Even for a second, you already felt like your feet were lifting off the pavement. Hovering over the reality of the situation that you would probably never see him again. You already felt like you were flying. It wouldn’t have been more tv worthy if there was a romantic song crescendoing in the background. He looks away from you, now seemingly searching for something across the street. But, here you are, having to walk past the man as he nods at you like he has a cowboy hat and is tipping it at you. God, he’s look handsome in a cowboy hat. Once you’re past him he takes another look both ways. They really weren’t showing up, huh? Probably his fault. He really was looking to apologize, seriously, but of course they didn’t believe him. Maybe he really wasn’t around enough. Though, judging from the exceeding the expectations of beautiful person he just saw walk past him, maybe this day wasn’t that much of a disappointment.

He shrugs, not as uninterested as it might seem. and with a shake of his head, he returns to his seat inside. He puts his head in his palms, running his fingers through his hair. Maybe it was his fault for picking such a run down place. But he isn't one to get oo caught up in maybes and what ifs. What's done is done. Just like how his ex has apparently shown their former relationship to be.

You stop at once your cross the street, turning your head back towards the guy who was no longer at the door of the eatery. Looking at the sky, you're trying to remind yourself how late it is. But it wasn't working. now all you're doing is trying to plan out how much time id take for you to grab a water or something and sit down because you really did need to rest your feet. and while you were in there itwouldnt hurt to stare at him a little longer, would it? You nod to yourself, you should have enough time. You take another longing look at the sky, remembering how you felt like you were dancing in it when you saw his face, and head back the way you came.

you spot him instantly, pretty hard to miss, even from the back. At least for you with his silk black hair tickling his neck, sleeves of his shirt hung across shoulders anyone would die for, and smith skin that somehow seemed to lift your hands towards him. In a sort of muscle memory you didn't know you even had. You smooth our your clothes and take a breath, not wanting to linger at the door too long. gladly nobodys at the counter as you make a b-line for the drink cooler on the back wall, your eye already on the drink you want and-- "shit" you mutter to yourself. The door was stuck. Of course the door just had to be stuck. Cause you couldn't just quickly take your drink and sit and the booth directly in his eye sight and have your fun like you had planned. Because just like your shoes, today you just weren't going to get your way.

you feel a tall pressance behind you. the smell of some faded cologne and something else you couldn’t quite place…. Was it fuity? Earthy floral? But that’s what we now. It didn’t really matter as you turned around just in time to catch his lips moving ti speak. “Forgive me if I’m wrong but, I think you have to pull it.” Your eyes go wide, you try to look away, but not before the knowing smirk on his face is replaced with a big smile. “No no! It’s ok. I’m kidding! I swear, that thing was glued shut as a joke or something.” He laughs, his hands shooting up to hover over your shoulders. You can feel the warmth of his hands, welcomed since, being so close to the fridge you were starting to get a little too cool for comfort. But you relax at his statement, eyes going back to their normal size. You chuckle, “god you had be worried there for a second that I’d just embarrassed myself.” He shakes his head like at a past memory. “Listen, if it was anyone who was embarrassed it was me earlier when there were people in here and I tried for a good minute prying it open and fell flat on my ass….” He suddenly gets grim, and you almost are worried before you realize hes winding up for another joke. “And, sad to say, there’s really not much cushion to break the fall.” You start to snigger as he cocks his head at you, faking shock. “Oh my god! How dare you!” He puts a dramatic hand over his chest. His heart secretly beating hard under his hand. You try to contain your laughter, wanting to play along but the hand over your mouth is only going so much. “Worse part is I didn’t even know what I slipped on!” God you were so early to laugh with. How was this happening to him? “Proves you can actually try too hard.” You shrug, already fully enamored. He was only a few feet away from you but you wanted him to be closer. Somehow he had made this whole embarrassing situation a great experience. He had turned you wanting to run out is there and never come back to you laughing with him at what he had done earlier. Maybe it was just knowing someone had done the same thing, maybe it was who exactly was explaining what happened to him was. Yeah that probably had something to do with it. But however he achieved it he achieved it well. And right now that stupid drink you’d probably never be able to taste now was a mile away in your mind. “I honestly wanted to curl up in the back and never leave.” You raised an eyebrow. Was he like an owner of this place? “Speaking of: I’ll go get you a drink!” He shoots you a quick smile and bolts off towards the back kitchen. A minute later coming back with the exact drink you wanted and a cup with ice. “How…” you wonder aloud. “Oh this? I’m friends the owner and his son. Used to come here almost every day after school to see my friend and get and a free ice pop from his dad.” Now that you're inknabout it, yeah, this place has been in business for as long as you’ve been there and from the looks of it it’s even older. You nod. “And this?” He holds up the drink you had your eye on from the cooler as he puts the cup down at the opposite bench from his at his table. “I saw you looking at it. Good choice. I’ve had to have tired every other flavor and drink here and that ones the best.” Your eyes fall to the two and a half empty bottles of it on his side of the table. God he’s really been sitting here for a while.

“I can see that.” You take a seat as he scoots the other bottles to the side. now you're suddenly wondering why he sat you by him. But you figure it's noting as you try to strike up a conversation. "You've been here for a while, I'm guessing." you gesture to the drink bottles piling up. and you hope he's not like that in his home life. he rubs the back of his head, acting like you've caught him red handed. But suddenly looking down, up, anywhere but your eyes that already seemed to drive him up a wall with how enchanting they were. "Yeah.... about that..." he laughs nervously, and you wonder if you've struck a sensitive spot. cause, with the way he's acting, seems like it. he shrugs nonsheluntly then raises his head. "Yeah, so my ex didn't show up when I asked them to meet me here. Not to tell you my entire life story or anything but… uh I was gonna stop waiting cause and hour with no call seems a little much to just be getting out your door late. You know I’ve never gotten stood up before. It’s kinda a weird feeling.” He tries to joke, and you can’t tall if he’s serious or not. But You nods, now understanding his situation. “Ans what made you…. Stay?” You ask. “I was disappointed at first, but now, I think it might’ve been the best. Cause hey, I got to see you.” He smiles, cheeks puffing and perfect lips curling until you start to smile too. “Yeah and meet me too.” You stand up a little and reach your hand over to him. “My names y/n”

after talking with him a little bit more, and him getting you another drink. In which you followed him with your eyes as he came and went. You feel comfortable enough to share more with him. “I sorta understand what you feel though.” You breathe, body feeling surprisingly relaxed when thought you just met the guy. But with the way he wrapped your attention to him and him only, you happily decided not to think of much else. “What? Your last relationship was a bust too?” “No, but, I understand how you feel with getting disappointed.” He looks you dead in the eyes, making heat creep up into your cheeks. “I hope you’re not disappointed now.” You smile, shaking your head with a firm no. “Far from it.” He muttered a “me too” under his breath, winded a little too much to get stronger words out. a bit later and you two are cleaning up the table from empty bottles. “…but yeah, kinda like what you said I keep wanting to do things. Experience things…. But random and very inconvenient road blocks keep popping up. Wrong place, wrong time. It’s starting to happen even with smaller things. It’s annoying honestly” you think back to not long ago today when your stupid shoes just had to have a problem when you were walking home. Yeonjun dusts off his hands and takes a deep breath. “Here’s my proposal: we both seem to have been at a standstill when it comes to these things. What if,… together, we seek out what happiness and all the things we’d both want in a relationship.” “What’s in it for me?” You ask. Thought barely even caring. You were already trying to make an excuse to spend more time with him. Seemed like an interesting guy who had some things to say you were actually interested in listening to.

he smiles again. Pulling up jazz hands next to his face. “Experience.” He jokes, beat later and he’s not serious “Also, we’d get to hang out.” You think for a moment. It didn’t sound like a bad idea. “So…. Like a date? Is that what you’re saying?” Getting to be close to someone like that, “it’s just…. a chance like his doesn’t happen all the time and I know this is a weird thing to ask but let’s get close, yeah?” you think for a moment. "get close" you've never heard it put like that. what the 'it' was you were even referring to you didn't know. but whatever he meant you didn't really care. cause here was something, right in front of your grasp, asking for you to come closer. no road blocks, noting keeping you further than you longed for. the both of you wanted someone to be close with. this was perfect, right?

that night you wonder what in the world you exactly meant by “experiences” or whatever else the fuck you told him. You knew what he was asking of you. You knew what you had agreed to barely any questions asked. And you don’t regret it, but a small part of you really wants to have talked about what exactly is on or off the table. But Yeonjune had just gotten out of a relationship. So did he really want to spend all his time with you doing vaguely couply or friendshipy things? Turns out he didn’t mind it in the least. In fact, the next day he calls you unexpectedly to go out to a cafe of your choosing. “We like the same drink. So I trust you with these things now.” You smile and though he can’t see you he hears it in your voice. “Wait why did you want us to go there?” “Well we’re going to because friends aren’t we? Both of us are seeking something without a road block and preferably a human companion and not an allergy. How else are we supposed to become close friends if we don’t spend any time together?” You say yes but, deep down you’re thinking about all the other terms for the two of you he could’ve used other than friends. Eh you figured this was where it was gonna go anyways. But it didn’t mean you didn’t want to spend time with him.

Yeonjun on the other hand was currently wallowing in self pity once you two got off the phone. He rocked back and forth with his knees to his chest. “Friends?” Really? Why did he have to be so blunt about it? People were starting to stare. God usually he wasn’t like this. Or… in a way maybe he kinda was. Beating and around the bush and shit.was that the right decision though? He’s just gotten out of a relationship and he aided in braking. Maybe being friends for a bit wouldn’t be so bad. The problem was, he didn’t know now if he could stay far enough away like friends do. Well and least the friends who actually are just that only.

You meet him at the place. Well, meet as in hes five minutes late. He stumbles in the place looking like he’s been awkward log enough to have hallucinations. But when he sees you the hardness on his face disappears. “I have something for you.” He says in a sing songy tone. Both his hands are in front of him. You look outside. “Where?” He looks genuinely offended as he pulls a small tube out his pocket. “A token of my appreciation for keeping me company.” Hopefully for a while longer, too. He thinks. You wait for him to open his palm to you.

“come and get it.”

you look around, thankfully he’s quiet enough so as to not draw all the attention towards the two of you. You grasp his tightly closed palm with two hands and start prying. Really? Did he really have to be so difficult? A moment later and you open the jaw like clamp that was his hands right before he could tease you about taking so long. “Glue?” “Yeah super glue” he puts infusus on the super part to make it seem better than it is. you made me do all of that? for glue? “Why are you—“ “it’s not even used! Still is the package!” “But it’s…. Glue.” He places it in your palm, closing your hand around it. “Glue that can be used to fix your shoe you wore yesterday.” He realized it was starting to need fixing? It was that obvious? He must see your wheels turning. “Get it now?” “Oh yeah, thanks.” Still surprised he even payed attention to that.

he walks you home that day and the both of you want to say more but you hold back, not wanting to go there just yet.

next time he calls you it isn’t just a five minute transaction of where the both of you wanted to go or if you were busy. He was originally just calling to see how you were doing but it turned into you saying you were hungry. Then him asking what you had in your fridge cause you needed to eat. Then you groaning “notiiiinnnnnggg” as your roles over onto your stomach on your bed. “Really?” He sounds worried through the other side of the phone. “Actually noting?” He was already grabbing his keys so he can run to the store to pick you up a basket full of whatever you wanted. “No, no. Not really. Just don’t have what I want.” Which then turned into an hour long debate of what brand and type of Raman was the best and lots of “how the fuck can you stand to eat that shit?” Laughing, and eventually the offer to go and get some right then and there. “It’s about dinner time anyways.” You reason, stepping over to where your clothes were.

"Itadakimasu!” He says as you take your first spoonful, not waiting to sit down.

and he's Looking way to cute for getting ramen. And later once you two sit down on a nearby park bench to enjoy the packaged goods, you tell him just that. “Aren’t you like, too cool for going to go get ramen from a convenience store?” “I like to dress well.” You stare blankly at him “my clothes or?” He asks. “Just you. Not just the nice clothes.” You’d be a hipacrate if you said it was weird to dress decently to be here. “I dunno, you just…. You have this- this was about you. How you conduct yourself, I mean, seems a little two high end for eating like this.” You didn’t know if you were on point or not, not knowing him for long would really do that to you. What he says next you’re not ready for, and really he doesn’t know if he is either. But he says it none the less. Wasting no time getting into his own head, a place he also wasn’t too ready to go into. “I’ll try to be more open with you, then.” He pulls at a stray string from his pants. Weirdly enough, he had accedentally matched you. And also weirdly enough you and all your “this is not a date” “this is not a date” jitters did not know what to do with that. You look up at him, body wanted to freeze but mind wanting noting more than to scoot closer to him in intrigue. “I know I’m—“ he started, placing the cardboard cup to his side and holding the ankle that was slung over his knee “I’m glad you think I’m cool and shit. But I need to understand that’s not everything to me. Sure,it’s a lot. Do you know how long it took me to pick out this outfit?” Yeonjun laughs. He looks at a loss for words.

“It’s not everything. Got it.” You nod, “and you’re not too cool for ramen.” He shakes his head with a smile. “I know we just met and what you said was probably a joke but, i never wanna come off as better than you. Or too good for something you’d like to do. Or anyone for that matter. Slap me if I do, please.” You realized something right then and there as each word came out of his mouth: he was telling th truth. And telling it to swine he hasn’t known for long. He wanted ti push himself out there. You realize that. But he also was careful not to only show one side. You felt honored.

you learn a lot of things about each other with your legs brushing against each there’s on wood bench that couldn’t be any less comfortable. But once you stoped focusing on it and starting on him. It was like you felt the clicks of mores code inside your head. Even though it was only you rocking back and forth in the squicky chair, it still felt like something bigger. You and him sitting here. Some sort of code telling you something. A subliminal message that bubbled under the surface. Words or a feeling cast into your mind without you realizing it. Something about all this telling you that his was right. He was right.

you learn that he likes fashion

That he’s the type to give his jacket to you when you’re cold. Cause he did. and no, you definitely didn't feel a jolt up your spine when he did that

you learned that oh yeah he’s definitely a fuckin flirt

that he doesn’t want to be viewed as some one dimension being. A robot, who only knows one thing and that’s how to save his face. He doesn’t want to be viewed as an airhead who should care about more things than he does. Cause it seems like he does care. Does think about a lot of things. And it sounds like he’s had the experiences to talk about it when he explains how He doesn’t wand people to look at him and only see him. Some guy and want to know all about him. He really wants people to try and get to know what makes up him on the inside too.

he learned a lot about you, too. listening intently whenever you spoke. like hat rain flavor you could eat until you died and what good smells and flavors you remember from childhood that whenever experienced again now, bring you back a hole flood of memories that feel like new

you learned, most importantly that you liked spending time with him a whole lot and he did too

“Ever feel like you want a moment to last forever?” He asks, looking deeper into your eyes than he has intended. Stupid back of his mind coming to the front. You look to both your sides as if there could be someone else he’s talking to. “Yeah that ramen in my mouth.” He scoots closer to you. Just want you wanted but couldn’t say. “Want me to take your picture?” You raise an eyebrow. "I mean, you do already have your camera out." he notes.

the next most memorable time you spend with him is at your place. you joke he looks like a wreck and he admits he hasn't gotten much sleep in the past couple days. he takes a look at himself in his phones camera. and then tries to smooth down his hair. "I really do look like it. I might have to stay here forever, I can't go back outside looking like this." and he actually looks desperate. you ponder for a moment, wondering what the hell you were going to do with him. "are you thinking about a way to help or how expensive it would be to keep me here?" he laughs. an idea pops into your head and you jump up to the bathroom. it wouldn't be so bad, he thinks, spending more time than he ever has with you. he's smiling jut thinking about it as you, unaware and running, come back to him with a razor and shaving cream. a blank look quickly shifts onto his face while you're sitting there across from him, most generic and lifeless smile on your face, blinking your eyes manically. he backs away like you're holding a weapon. (TECHNICALLY--)

"oh no, no no no no no-"

next thing he knows he's sitting on a chair with shaving cream on his face, trying not to shiver every time your hand comes closer. "Im telling you." you try to reason, "the only thing that's making you look like this is... this." you gesture to the lower part of his face. he humphs still. "as much as it'd be funny to see you in a handlebar mustache I think that's contributing to making you look like a zombie." "are you calling me pale?" he accuses, his neck shrinks back into him like a turtle. he doesn't know why he agreed to this. he does... though. he agreed cause you're you and he'd almost never say no. and as much as he'd like to lie to himself and cover it up, he wants you closer. physically, mentally, whatever you'd like. and maybe him saying he wants to do cute little friendshipy things together wasn't entirely true. he still wants to do these things, always has, but he wanted the both of you to view them as more than something small. he wanted them to go down in history in the both of your minds as the day you felt your hearts flutter and skip a beat and your mind spin in the best way possible.

"no, im calling you..." youre suddenly at a los for words on how to exactly describe him. "let me just do it." he grabs your arm to hold you back. and from then on the both of you are locked in the game he started. you try to force it out of his tight grasp but its no use. "let go!" you laugh, struggling, "you said youd let me do it!" you yell as he laughs. eventually he stops, letting go and letting you do your thing.

"does this even count as sorta friends seeking what we want from a relationship or friendship or whatever?" he turns around at your words, suddenly serious as you stop what you're doing to say that. "firstly, wow offended. sorta friends? I thought we were much more than that." you probably shouldn't hang on that sentence. but you do. more than sorta friends could just mean friends. all there could be to it. but since you have no idea, you choose to from now on think about it way too often and settle for the butterflies in your stomach. "also, were seeking happiness, right? we're smiling, aren't we?" he nods like: that sounds about right to me. you smile at him, his face going back to where you had him where you are facing his side.

"I think we make really good choices together." Yeonjun tells you, you’re heart nearly stomping at the sound of his voice, a smile creeping out your face as he nearly trips over a crack in the sidewalk as his words slur together. this was his idea, you remind yourself. "um nope. I didn't make the choice." but you did, he suggested it and you went with him without thinking twice. you reach down to fix your god forsaken shoes again and look to the left to see the same eatery you'd met him at. "I thought it'd be cute." he sulks, not wanted to stop talking there. but I ended up letting us get like this cause I was scared. I wanted us to have fun, he thinks, walk down "memory lane." take you to where we first met and where I think I started believing in forever. and he fears he's messing things up, again.

"oh." you say under your breath. and he just smiles as if he didn't just tell you a whole lot more than what you were expecting. but you just act like you didn't hear it. "Why'd you want to do something cute?" you ask him, your arms around each other shoulders feeling heaver now. "because you deserve it." and he wanted you to see him in a different light, not just the freind he though you only saw him as. but hey, now with the both of you half asleep and stumbling, a fresh new light is deffintitly what you're seeing of each other. just, not the one he had wanted. "aw, you deserve it to."

you both had agreed to "sober up" at your place before he went home. somehow that had turned into you laying down, head on his stomach and him drawing random shapes onto your collar bone. "sober up", meaning drink some coffee or anything to get your energy back up and try not to go to sleep just yet. He'd gotten entirely too tired entirely too fast and here he was paying for it. Not being able to talk to you as much as he had wanted. He felt kinda stupid, letting himself get that way just because he had no idea what to say. Or even if this was a good time.

Somehow that had turned into you laying in between his legs on your tummy and him staring entirely too long at your lips. his eyes half shut, he looks at the clock on his phone and stretches. "leaving already?" you sensed just what he was thinking. "I don't know if I should stay." it comes out more of a question than he had originally intended. maybe you were too willing, looking for someone like him, even. but this was how you just were: falling quickly, hard, and frequently. but when he touched you, it felt so real and grounding that you knew you weren't going to go anywhere. its only fair for him to match and stay here too, right?

"well," you inched closer, higher up on him, tiredness taking over and clouding your mind, "you should. at least a little longer." "a little as in five minutes or...." he's asking to tease now, really. he knows you wouldn't mind however long he's planning on staying. you roll your eyes at him. "god, what am I gonna do with you?" you laugh. you're about to look away, shift away, when Yeonjuns eyes catch yours, making you linger on his face for another minute. "whatever you'd like." the words come out of his lips almost too perfectly for you to focus anymore. suddenly this was getting real and the shock of it made you want to say something about it. or at least do something-- agree somehow? you weren't sure. "I mean, Im so tired. what are we--" his hand is on top of yours now. and this time the only thing your mind can think of is to lace your fingers with his. the scene was kinda funny; him looking at his hand like he was in awe while you stared at his jawline and realized it really can't go on like this. with the both of you longingly staring at the other and barely controlling yourselves. heart fluttering a little too much for staying just friends. but really, you reason, were you ever?

your elbows are both propped up on your mattress. he looks back at you, eyes shining more than before and you chuckle. "bro, are you blushing?" he looks at your interlocked hands and then back at your smiling features. as much as he'd like to linger on it and memorize this new smile you have, one he's never quite seen before, he also wants to make it even bigger. "Dude," he nearly whines, long and drawn out, "did you call me bro while we're holding hands?" and it worked, you're smile is a 3x bigger now. but what he didn't expect was to get the sudden urge to kiss you. at least not right now.

as his brain was short circuiting just thinking abut it, you're sitting up, hands still wound tightly together like someone had taken ribbon and tied it to the both of you. he comes up with you, your head finding its perfect place in the crook of his neck. and a second later, with him right above you like this... you're thinking of kissing him too. you also feel like going to sleep right here right now. your face unwashed and pjs not on. "we just gonna stay like this?" "I wouldn't mind. you?" he cranes his neck towards you. "someones gonna have to--" he leads you by the hand closer to him. if that was even possible. now you're more face to face. and when he leans back a little you follow. half sitting he brings a pointer finger to hook gently under your chin, sighlently asking if he could bring you closer. you nod and his lips are on yours in an instant.

now his free hand is traveling up and down your torso as he deepens the kiss. his lips are soft, plush, and warm and way too fucking comforting. your other hand is fidiling with the hair at the nape of his neck, forearm on his shoulder and wrist crooked as his arm circles your waist, brining you impossibly closer to him. it felt like the hole world was right in front of you. and his hand held the keys to you feeling extrdenary, to your heart opening and letting him in. you finally pull away, but only because of the need for air. if it was up to you you'd be staying in his arms, lips pressed together his pure bliss for all eternity. "...Turn off the lights." you finish. he starts to move away from you and your eyes widen. "that wasn't an invitation to leave." you say. and his hand stays laced with yours the whole time he gets up to turn off the lights. he strains and the tips of your fingers were the only thing that could stay together but it was still sweet.

he climbs in bed next to you again, resuming his previous position. and pulls out his phone to switch on a dull flashlight, putting it in a space where you two aren't blinded but can still see. you look at him like: why? "wanted to see you." he says simply. you start to wonder why but he's a step ahead of you, leaning in to show you why. the hand that was on your waist before is grasping the side of your face gently as the two of you lay further down. his eyes are closed but fuck, all he sees is you. all he feels is you. and all he's thinking about is you. no worries about what he's gonna say or how it'll come out. somehow, you've opened the flood gates of his emotions in a way he doesn't think he's ever felt before. he starts peppering kisses along your jaw, neck, cheeks, then eventually when he's had his fill he moves back to your lips. And now with your lips in sync and closeness heating the both of you up to where all you needed and wanted in that moment was each other, everything that you two could think about was how right this feels.

the next morning and he's you wake up with limbs tangled together and him behind you, breathing tickling your neck. But once he wakes up and the worries are back, he shoots up, no longer feeling dangerous and free. His head is started to pound from thinking about this. about you, about the both of you and what happened last night. what was he going to do? he collects his phone from your extra charger you plugged into the wall for him at what had to have been early morning. when all he could think about was how you felt next to him and how he never wanted to leave.

"Where you going?"

he doest even want to turn around. he barely even recognizes what he's doing. he doesn't even want to.

Now you're actually starting to get worried. had the both of you moved too fast too soon? was letting yourselves go the night before even a good idea? you were starting to dought the both of your decisions. god, you don't know what you'd do if this actually affected him as much as it seems like it did. maybe you should've thought through answering him with a yes when he asked if he could stay. or at least put some difference between he two of you! and besides, what did this even mean? were you two just going to go back toeing friends who look at each other for too long and replay that night over and over in your heads? or did this mean he just needed a moment to collect himself? cause you knew what you wanted, alway have. but for some reason he seemed always in the dark about ti. like he was caught between two different lives.

but you hated the way he was on the fence. you wanted to shout at him to hurry up and pick one. it'd been a while since you've started this bizzar relationship anyways. so why was he making eyes at you, being this close, and now kissing you apparently, and then not saying what that means to him or how he wanted to proceed?

you're following him through your place now. "I was just starting to like this." you liked how firm it felt. how definite it all was. and you thought he felt that too. but now he's finally turning around before your door. and backtracking towards you. he steals one last surprisingly sweet kiss before he leaves and mumbles angainst your lips, "me too. im sorry... just, give me a bit of time?" you still don't fully understand, and maybe thats ok. but you do understand that you need to give him a minute. leave him be for a little until he comes to you. and you can respect at least that.

a day of thinking later and he's reaching for his phone. sticker you'd picked out together from one of your little outings still holding onto his phone case. they looked so cheep you were sure it'd fall off in a day or two. hm, he should probably update you, right? but more than that, he misses talking to you. or, at least sending a good morning and good night text on the both of your ends. he wants to sulk. he really does. but he knows that won't be doing either of you or the current state of your relationship any good.

but...

he doesn't know how to put it to you so should he just not? but its... you. and suddenly, for what felt like the first time in ages, he didn't want to mess around with these things and drag his feet and whatever else he's done in the past that feels like a lifetime ago ever since seeing your face. he's falling. and falling hard. he actually admits how deeply he is into you this time. you've gotten each other into the palm of the others inviting hand. he doesn't feel-- no, he can't, mess around this time. you've made him realize that these types of things are way to important. you're way to important to take so long with. You've captivated him. as he has you. Took each other into your arms and held with such a force that didn't suffocate nor shatter but instead, made you both feel comforted and warm

he picks up his phone to call you, smiling. yeah, he knew exactly what he ws going to say.

after calling you to see if you’re home to talk, and knowing word for word what he wants to tell you about what he feels, sparkling eyes show up at your door in record time and this time the exact shoes you were wearing the day you two had met behind his back to replace the broken pair.

~End~

2023 copyright for shutupheathersorryheatherr

well there you go!! hope whoever had read has enjoyed it at least somewhat lol this took me too long to write and its not the best

I have trouble writing for people im not attracted to

anyways please leave some love like commenting or a reblog if you liked it!

#yeonjun x reader #tomorrow x together #txt yeonjun #yeonjun fluff #ghosts writing #Yeonjun x poc reader #txt fluff #yeonjun #yeonjun imagines

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