#idk how to tag this kind of thing
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Really didn't want it to come to this, but between moving, steph's eyeballs and the fact several hospital visits are now in collections, we're going to be rolling with a gofundme, probably going up (officially, as we created one when December went to shit but didn't publicize it as...well we're stubborn) tomorrow or Sun. Primarily to take care of some of the debt in collections and helping with the exorbitant cost of preventing my wife from going blind (and I have expensive physical therapy for a frozen shoulder on top of it), but we've also had to drain what we had in savings just to get a new place to live and I still have to figure out a solution for my work space.
Long story short, we lived in my mother-in-law's house, and she passed away. We're forced to sell the house to cover her debts and the mortgage and I have no idea what if anything would be left after being split 3 ways between three sisters (and we're hoping to sock most of that away towards buying a house later, as ironically it's so much cheaper to pay a mortgage than rent plus I’m so tired of living at the whims of other people). Finding a place has been absolutely horrible, and we have to pay 2800 for a deposit PLUS first month's rent. We'd thought it was just the 2800 to move in, but also paying first month's rent basically means we have no money to pay for help moving, (not even to rent a truck).
So anything that could help with the immediate needs of getting through May with less difficulty would be welcome as the first month is going to be tight.
https://ko-fi.com/sniperct
https://paypal.me/sniperct (pls ignore birth name lol)
This is just hospital bills, this doesn’t include what we owe for the eye procedures as I still need to dig out that bill. It’s at least 3000 for the eyes alone.
ETA:
Thank you so much for sharing everyone!
Someone found the gofundme somehow last night and donated, which is amazing and I could kiss them.
https://www.gofundme.com/f/help-us-survive-medical-debt-and-moving
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finding magic
If you ever find yourself feeling sad about living in a world without magic, or miracles, or whatever word/concept you prefer, just remember:
There exist winged, living creatures that glow in the dark.
Berries that were unripe yesterday, inedible last week, nonexistent last month, turn sweet and delicious of their own accord overnight. And after you pluck them to eat or to share, new ones spontaneously appear and ripen to take their place.
Merely by breathing on liquid elixir or waving a wand that has been dipped into the potion, one can create streams of iridescent, translucent, ephemeral jewels that float in the breeze and then vanish in the blink of an eye.
And here I am sitting here in one little corner of the world, and you are off in your own corner, perhaps thousands upon thousands of miles apart, and my words and thoughts have reached you without either of us needing to speak, to meet, to travel, or even to know each other by name.
#positivity#magic#miracles#fantasy#real life#everyday magic#fireflies#berries#soap bubbles#technology#mindfulness#poetry#prose poetry#sort of but not really#idk how to tag this kind of thing#but the world sure is magical if you look at it the right way#dandelion says#dandelion rambles#feel free to add on other irl magics if you want
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I had many ideas for these lyrics but since I don’t have time for traditional art I decided to use this double-failure of a painting that I did a long time ago
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had never heard of "mlp infection aus" until this month and ngl i still dont know what they are but. it made me want to draw some of them getting taken over by their cutie marks or something......
#if any of this needs to be tagged pleaseee tell me idk how to tag this kind of stuff for blacklist...#mlp#my little pony#twilight sparkle#apple jack#rarity#fluttershy#my art#mlp infection au#<-again. no idea what thats actually about but this seemed like a fun design thing...thats literally all this was to me.#also i havent watched the show in years.#body horror
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pelican town, ‘72
#stardew valley#stardew valley spoilers#sdv#sdv spoilers#grandpa#mister qi#mr. qi#idk how dates work in stardew universe im just bullshittin#i love qi’s huge fucking eyebrows you dont notice them at first but theyre there#(gives our collective grandpa a ponytail) i think he had one. whatever#’why isnt mister qi blue’ my hc is he is blue from long-term iridium supplementation#and was originally just a regular person#but also it’s nice to see ur fav be like a normal human color#if u read tag essays tho consider this:#qi discovers secret to immortality (consuming iridium in a specific manner)#wants to share discovery with his farmer (player’s grandpa) and in that way. they will have all the time in the world to build#a perfect farming/business empire whose legacy will last forever and ever and theyll be 2gether forever#but it turns out. like a lot of normal people would. his farmer does not want to live forever#and obv he doesn’t#in an attempt to try not to ever lose the thing that means more to him than anything else in the world. qi inadvertantly ensures he will#because his farmer is dead. and he’s going to live forever#but. it’s kind of ok. because he has infinite money and was able to figure out how to talk to his dead bf#and now YOU help them fulfill their joint goal of making the farm’s legacy last forever#smile. heart#sobbing
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oh no that's his fucking son
i just wanted to color one of @somerandomdudelmao panels from today cuz i am dead and dying goodbye everyone
#rottmnt#cass apocalyptic series#cass apocalypse au#cass fanart tag#rise raph#future raphael#rise of the tmnt#rottmnt raph#casey jones jr#casey jr#art#my art#KIND OF#idk just a quick thing i just wanted to show just how in awe he is cuz IM CRYING
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Hyperfeminine characters 🥰🥰🥰
Hyperfeminine characters who aren't portrayed as stupid, vapid or vain 🥰🥰 Hyperfeminine characters who genuinely enjoy quote unquote feminine interests and aren't vilified or looked down upon because of them 🥰🥰 Hyperfeminine characters who are big on female friendships rather than thrown into jealousy and "cat fight" arcs 🥰 Hyperfeminine characters whose deep interest in fashion isn't considered superficial and silly, but interesting and respectable! 🥰 Hyperfeminine characters who aren't the butt of the joke and who are well-rounded characters with depth 🥰🥰
#IDK how to tag this#but basically#more elle woods#also hyperfeminine characters include characters who arent female presenting#i'm just!!!!!!!!!! reclaiming hyperfeminine characters!!!!!!#cause!!!!!!! you can be hyperfeminine and badass and clever and intelligent and kind and interesting and ALL SORTS OF THINGS#you know what she IS like other girls#and what about it#like girls aren't :')))))))))) amazing :')))))))#anyway#imma write all the hyperfeminine people I can#mine
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dream visit (nostalgia) - a 2nd anniversary katfl comic
#wooo wooo yayyyy uayyy happy anniversary#happy birthday elfilin and elfilis my beloveds#kirby#elfilin#fecto elfilis#idk if i should tag this as forgo#katfl#LOTS of talking abt this piece in the tags below#i wanted to do some kinda thing and I got this idea for a comic#so i just kinda went in and did it messy#not really worrying too much about how it looked#and I like how it came out I think#even if elfilin looks kinda bad at some parts#kind of a sequel to my old dream visit post?#that one I gave elfilis/forgo the tunic script but I didn’t feel like doing it this time#this one i was kinda thinking about like. ok#identity and stuff and how it differs for them#i know forgo and elfilis are 2 separate entities#but i like drawing elfilis#so i think in this dream scenario where they can kinda be whatever#they’d show themself as elfilis#because that’s what they are trying to become again anyways#and really elfilin is only a small part of the whole#so forgo IS far more ‘elfilis’ than elfilin would be#similarly they just keep saying ‘i’ whereas elfilin sees that form and thinks ‘we’#forgo being kind of self centered: they don’t need elfilin to achieve their goals#that being destruction which elfilin would inhibit#except they do to actually become elfilis again#idk whatever I should stop talking#wybs art
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i do not play with ghost trick kitty
i just dont know which should be keychains which should be phone charms or both or neither.... Man
#ghost trick#comifuro#ghost trick: phantom detective#excuse the massive watermarks this is my first time selling things seriously and idk im jus worried#fanart#ghost trick fanart#cat#im tempted to tag spoilers this cat's very existence is kind of spoilery#OH YEAH the wmarks arent shameless and delirious bc this is my twitter account yayy#how do people work social media again being in school hell for 3 years really ruins your sense of coolness#my catalogue is NOT DONE i have too many ideas and too little energy
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So, here's the thing:
Tango knows that Zedaph is this close to staging an intervention.
He lies against the wiring for Decked Out and stares at the ceiling. He should probably be more concerned about that. Early-season Tango would be concerned about that; a situation getting bad enough that Zedaph, of all people, is ready to stage an intervention is normally a sign it's gotten pretty dang bad. But he's close. He's so close. And it's not like he's worried, not anymore.
He'd been worried, once? Like, he'd been scared, at some point of what the Frozen Citadel was starting to do to him. But now that he's there--
If he's asked, Tango will say it's mutualism, and not elaborate, because if anyone stages enough of an intervention to stop Decked Out from finishing what it's started, he's probably going to scream. He's probably going to always wonder. Worst of all, he won't finish the game on time. So like, so what if it's eating him a little? Or a lot? Or basically completely, given that he's pretty sure the damage is irreversible at this point?
Anyway, it doesn't matter. Start of the season Tango probably would care more, but like, it's mutual. Decked Out gets to eat Tango. Use him as an appropriate game piece. Sometimes as a processor. To do repairs. Whatever. It's important for the whole process. And Tango gets a sick game. Which, for some, sounds like an absurd trade-off, but it's not just the game, okay?
It's not just--
If it were just "I need to let my accidentally very sentient and very large base eat me to finish the game", he might do it? But he wouldn't, like, be actively conspiring to hide the fact that he's starting to be physically incapable of breathing like, normal oxygen and stuff. He wouldn't be conspiring to hide just how literal the shop item allowing you to control the gamemaster is. He wouldn't be trying to hide how close he is to just--being another part of Decked Out. Not being a "Tango" as an individual, but being a part of the machine. Basically a really fancy redstone component.
If it were just "he's really proud and he'd be sad if it took longer", he wouldn't have hung a sheep on the outside of the building to make sure some part of Decked Out knows that Zedaph is its friend, once there isn't a Tango to remind it of that properly. He would have asked Zedaph to actually do that intervention he's planning.
He didn't. He acted like he had several more weeks than he probably did. But it's fine. Decked Out ate the fear, anyway, so he can't feel it, and whatever sense of desire to like, not be redstone component was probably eaten also, and. And.
He's not sure how to describe it in a way that doesn't make him sound insane, but--
It's so close. Decked Out is so close to eating him completely. And that should be terrifying, if that weren't the first thing that got dissolved away, if he hadn't been scared since forever. Maybe, somewhere, there's part of him that is scared. There's a lot of him that knows he should be.
But those moments, the ones he's having more and more, where he forgets he's Tango. Where he forgets he's anything but part of the machine. And he's part of something big, and great, and he has a specific use, and he's aware for all of it but not aware of being himself, and he can feel exactly how he's important to the great machine and he does his job and absolutely everything else fades away entirely and he is the Game Master and even that's not an individual identity it's part of a whole it's part of something beautiful it's part of something so, so alive while not being alive at all and, and then--and then he's not done being eaten yet. And the Tango comes in. The fear, the insecurity, the, the flaws.
And he'd just lie there, and he'd feel it. The almost-just-a-part. The sense of just--being, and not being anyone in particular, but being. The lack of self. He'd feel the voltage from the redstone wires and try to capture it again, and be unable to, not on his own.
Not while he's left as Tango, at least a little bit uneaten.
So. Uh. He told you he didn't know how to describe it without sounding insane. But he'll never forgive himself. Never forgive himself if he doesn't find out what happens when it's done. What it's like to just--be a part of Decked Out and nothing else. What it feels like to give in completely.
Therefore. Zedaph. Intervention. Pretend he's better than he is so Zedaph doesn't do that. It shouldn't be long now. The amount of time he's aware and Tango is--less. The amount of fear is--it's entirely gone now. The amount he thinks "gee beginning of season Tango would say this is a bad plan" is almost zero.
The game is almost ready to open.
If he can just hold out that long, then there won't be anything anyone could do.
They'll be too busy having fun with the game, anyway. With any luck, no one will notice.
#hermitcraft#tangotek#a bee fic#hey remember the ficlets about decked out eating tango? well.#the thing is: the obvious way decked out eats its players is by killing them. but killing tango isn't the kind of nutrients decked out need#it needs his mind. it needs his hands. it needs him to play his part.#so the easiest thing for decked out to digest away THERE would just be tango's sense of self.#so he's broken down into the most useful component part of himself to the greater organism#and it got to the fear first so he wouldn't realize quite how bad of an idea letting it finish might be.#horror#idk what kind of horror so here take the tag#anyway. this thought won't leave my head so have fun!
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I feel like starting a tag game so let's go :D
If you could take three people (celebrities, fictional characters, mythological beings, anyone really), steal their gender and mix these three genders into the ultimate gender for yourself, which people's genders would you take? (feel free to add pictures)
I'll go first:
Rick Wright
Peregrin Took
And David Bowie in this particular era
Tagging (no pressure to do this ofc!):
@falldogbombsthemoon @aseriesofshocks @horrormovie-addict @tabb1tha @vengefulvermin @percys-lemons @coffeefromvoid @killingthemoon84 @skelegenie @miko-fellco @insectsinthestars and anyone else who wants to join!! (sorry if I forgot anyone)
#misha talks#tag chain#gender#genderqueer#nonbinary#transgender#queer#gender expression#idk how else to tag this lol#it was kinda hard for me to pick just three as I was also thinking of george harrison and syd barrett and some others#but if you think about it syd is kind of a mix of these three isn't he?#anyways this is meant to be a lighthearted thing don't take it too seriously :)
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2nd batch of sourdough! Lots better than the first, actually got some crumb structure this time (bc the starter is finally ready for bread)
#it's 70% hydration 20% starter and 16h bulk fermentation & 6h of proofing#I think I like the 70% hydration for now#it's still enough moisture to get that open structure but easy to work with#(hydration is the thing that makes the crumb structure open&tender so kind of the higher hydration dough u have the better the bread but th#problem with high-hydration dough is that it's real hard to work with so gotta build some skills before can move onto those#like some professionals even make 100% hydration doughs)#(the percentage is like how much water you have in comparison to the flour: 100% is like if u have 500g of flour you also have add 500g of#water or like 70%: 500g flour and 350g of water)#this is just a 250g of flour one tho bc I live alone and don't want waste/my freezer full of bread#idk if these interest anyone but idc it's my blog I'm going to be posting abt sourdough#should make up a tag for these#elvis bread#it's that one ^^ for now until (if) I can come up with a better one bc my starter is named Elvis#sourdough#april 2024#2024
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but fr outside of my contracted madness i absolutely refuse to give joe alwyn gold rush like how is that song at all related to their relationship the lyrics clearly spell out a relationship that either never existed or only existed in implication and fantasies and maybe-maybe nots and its so bitter and yet desperately soft in the bridge where it almost projects a sense of envy, of wanting to be them as much as you want them. It continues an interesting oft ignored lyrical trend of taylor wanting just as much to be her lover as to have them, envying their easy charisma (you were flush with the currency of cool/i was always turning out my pockets) or quiet dignity (your integrity makes me seem small) dating back to her earliest songs (the kind of flawless i wish i could be). Theres a projected self hatred and yearning to be better that twists itself into both romantic and sexual lust for her partners thats so fascinating and speaks to how all of her songs regardless of who theyre about are also an act of self reflection on who she is and who she wishes to be.
#barry.txt#taylor swift#putting this in the tags as a form of self protection but make no mistake this is a gay thing to do especially in gold rush#which through simple context clues is Obviously About A Woman or maybe even women in general#whivh is a totally seperate post on how taylor constructs and uses gender identity in her music#her girlhood and femininity are earnest but also so carefully constructed and so high effort and kind of desperate#shes a deeply self concious and obsessive person who never looks comfortable in anything ever unless shes#onstage or like. by herself in loose jeans and a tshirt#i think thats one of the things that subconsciously irritate ppl when it comes to her shes constantly and clearly putting in effort#to appear As The Celebrity Taylor Swift and struggles not to self censor or overperform in interviews (when she gives them)#especially present in pre 1989 interviews where the interviewers really didnt have to respect her or worry abt how they frame her#if they didnt want to. Like the fearless era rolling stone interview where she almost has a meltdown over her mom buying eggnog instead of#milk. That whole interview is strange looking back not just bc of the weird misogyny but also because of what it does share#taylor is....weird. She has a strange and desperate vibe and always reacts slightly too much and uses slang poorly#shes media trained and has learned how to socialize but you can feel her discomfort whenever she doesnt have a guitar in her hand#idk these tags have once again gotten so unweildy. i just find it interesting that she finally feels some level of comfortable#in sharing that construction w us in songs like mirrorball and mastermind and imo gold rush#and scene#should i write this up and put it in the swiftieism zine#i should write something and put it in the swiftieism zine
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hhhgh. Robin.
#doodles#one piece#nico robin#one piece art tag#congrats to the second fictional woman named robin that i have formed an emotional attachment to!!#also a good reason to keep practicing drawing hands#and a good reason to break out the fountain pen again#i think this little doodle looks reasonably good#hhhggh I'm exhausted#been serving on a jury since monday!! we finally served a verdict today!!! how exhausting!!!!#like ok it was kind of a cool experience I guess but then again i am interested in that kind of thing#but i had to wake up so much earlier than normal.. chairs were uncomfy...#lots of emotional and mental exhaustion#I'm glad to be done with it!!!#time to draw!!!!#anyway yeah so robin is up there in favorite character status I'm love her#expect more later idk
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"You need to work, it's wrong not to contribute to society in some way, you can't just expect to sit around and mooch off of others and be given handouts"
"Okay yeah, good point. I'm ready to work then"
"Oh like, you want a job? Why should anyone give you one? What special skills do you bring to the table? You better write a really good resume and cover letter to make a persuasive case for why you're the best possible person to be given a job"
#politics#idk if this actually counts as politics but I don't know how else to tag it#and yes I realize society is not actually one guy saying both of those things#but sometimes it does feel like there's some kind of contradiction that no one acknowledges
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thinking about how akio sees his younger self in utena and wondering if there's any fondness there. doesn't change the horror of what he does to her obviously but i do wonder
#akio and utena#m#long ramble in the tags sorry:#the thing about akio is that he's so evil bit he's also so human#he has feelings. i just don't know what they are (if anything) toward his victims#he loves anthy at the very least i'm sure of that. even if he hates her too. just like she loves and hates him. the lines are blurry.#and i just. i have to wonder whether any of that extends to utena at all. we know anthy at times feels similarly about utena and dios#(and akio by extension.) the simultanious love and resentment. so it's not too unlikely i think.#like. even though he never had anything but bad intentions in getting close to her#i'm not sure it's possible to do everything he did and feel nothing#not that he has any meaningful amount of guilt or remorse for it. i don't think that.#and i obviously don't think he “loved” her in any of the ways she might have thought he did#but did he not care at all? did he not feel any kind of fondness or sympathy or just. idk. pity? for her?#whatever the case it wasn't enough to reconsider having her killed so you know. how much does that actually matter anyway#idk. i think about it a lot. how abusers are rarely entirely indifferent toward their victims#the role he's playing in her life is so fucked up but it IS a role he's playing and i wonder how much he you know... internalizes it?#how much does he believe the illusion of family that he invites her into? because akio DOES often buy into his own illusions.#(similarly i think it's possible that akio is fond of touga too. their mentor-protégé relationship is horrible and abusive#but that doesn't make it less real. you know? maybe real is the wrong word.)#when he talks in episode 25 about wanting utena and anthy closer that's obviously so he can continue to groom her#but is there something genuine there too? i don't know.#again. it obviously does not make anything he does better or even different. but it is interesting to think about to me.#on the other side of that coin does seeing his own past youth and naivete and desire to do good that he (maybe) once had#reflected back at him through her mean anything?#is there resentment there? that she is what he couldn't be? or more likely he just thinks that idealism is stupid.#either way it's something he wants to take from her. anyway ramble over.#i talk a lot about utena's feelings toward akio (familial vs romantic love and the way the two are intertwined in fucked up ways)#but not much the other way around. probably because utena is actually a sympathetic character whose feelings the show very clearly#wants you to analyze and think about.#which is... less true for akio i think. though he's still a complex character with complex motives. he's just harder to get a grasp on.
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