#i wrote a whole post about it but here's some points
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Happy MET Gala Day. I wrote some tags on THIS post and instantly got brainworms. cw: In this ficlet, Eddie calls Steve a slut but it is said with affection.
"Steve!" Eddie screams over his shoulder into the next room. But his voice only echoes around him, bouncing off the pristine white walls of the hotel room ensuite that he thinks is as big as his uncle's old trailer, "The car is gonna be here any minute!"
Silence.
He smoothes his hands down his lapel one last time and smiles at his reflection before he turns on his heel and rushes into the hotel suite where he finds Steve right where he left him, in a make-up chair getting all dolled up by Chrissy with Robin by his side.
She is asleep in a bedazzled bathrobe and honestly, Eddie would prefer to join her. Not only is attending the MET Gala an expensive evening (Eddie loathes to think how much money Steve has spent in the lead-up to all this), but it all involves being gawked at and judged and repeatedly asked the same three questions by the press who are just going to make him come off like a real asshole anyway.
"Just getting glam done," Steve says, grimacing as Robin gives a grunting snore.
"Stop eating those flowers, Erica..." she mumbles, dipping her head and nuzzling into the plushy warmth of her collar.
Chrissy rolls her eyes and steps back to examine her handiwork.
Whatever that is, Eddie can't really tell. Steve looks just like his regular pretty self with maybe a spot of shimmering blush. He opens his eyes, fluttering his lashes and – well yeah, whatever Chrissy did makes his eyes pop more than usual.
But those eyes quickly grow dark, shadowed by a frown when Steve gives Eddie a once over.
"Is that your outfit?" he accuses.
Eddie nods and does a little twirl only to spin back around to the sight of Steve pursing his lips.
So much for pleasantly surprising each other with their outfits – the only thing that had Eddie giving this whole deal an ounce of his attention.
"Well it isn't on theme," he continues, shrugging with a nonchalance that would give Anna Wintour herself a run for her money.
"What are you talking about?" Eddie defends, "I'm wearing lace!"
He flaps his jacket to reveal a sheer black lace shirt before lifting his touser legs enough to show off his matching socks.
Steve pinches his nose.
"Eddie, that is a bare minimum!"
Eddie flails his hand in the direction of Steve's barely-there shirt, a sheer number that shows all of his chest hair.
"Excuse me for not dressing like a total slut."
He blushes as Steve stands up to reveal a similarly sheer pair of pants (if you could call them that). Underneath is nothing short of a goddamn codpiece that Eddie is certain won't cover his boyfriend's whole ass and –
Robin snorts again, causing Chrissy to giggle.
She nudges her partner and Robin startles awake, almost tipping back in her makeup chair and Eddie realises that 'doing glam' has taken so goddamn long, all because Buckley decided she needed the world's biggest feathery eyelashes.
"Boring!" she says, taking one bleary-eyed look (if she can see through those bird wings, that is) at Eddie's outfit.
She blows a raspberry for good measure.
Steve turns, chuckling and yep – that is at least half of his ass hanging out in some sort of lace-assless-chaps-codpiece situation that has no business being anywhere but on their marital bed – or a paid-for hotel equivalent.
Maybe they should just stay right here, Eddie thinks as he looks, his mouth agape as he ogles the sight before him.
"Calm down, Eddie," Chrissy warns with a wicked grin.
"Well, it's far too late now for us to do anything about it," Steve pouts, throwing on a floral-embroidered vest that at least covers a shred of his modesty, "I told you to come see my stylist."
"What about my brooch!" Eddie shrieks, pointing to the diamond-encrusted rose pin just above his breast pocket, "It's crystal."
#idk i imagine eddie is a rockstar and steve is a sports star of some description#steddie#steve harrington#eddie munson#steddie ficlet#robin buckley#chrissy cunningham#famous au#👕🧥
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Stargazing
Summary: You and Bucky are spending some time together under the stars.
Pairing: Boyfriend!Bucky Barnes x Girlfriend!Reader
Warnings: None, just a whole lot of fluff. Nerd Bucky. Nerd Reader. No use of Y/N. My poor attempts at being funny.
Word count: 1K because I'll kick myself I can't make anything short.
Prompt: we're sitting on your roof at midnight and you're pointing out every constellation but out of every star, you shine the brightest.
A/N: I wrote this story in like two hours, so bear with me. I don't know a lot about Astronomy, so I googled everything I put on here. I do know my fair share of Mythology but I realise some things may be wrong or just simply different from things you know, who knows Mythology knows there are a lot of versions of the same story, anything I wrote here are the version I've learned over the years, so no hate, but I'm always open to talk about it more if anyone wants to. Always respectfully, of course. Also, I wrote and posted this from my phone so I'm sorry if there are any mistakes.
Masterlist
“And see those three stars that make an angle?” Bucky points up to them. “That's Coma Berenices.”
One thing not many people know about Bucky Barnes is his love of Astronomy.
Back in the 40s he loved studying the constellations, learning as much as he could. So, after he regained control of his mind and joined the Avengers, he spends his free time catching up in all things space related he's missed since.
You have never been particularly interested in Astronomy, but seeing how passionate your boyfriend gets when it comes to it, you can never say no when he asks you to stargaze with him.
That's why you've spent countless times now in the position you are right now: Laying on a blanket next to Bucky on the roof of the Avengers Compound, looking at the stars and listening to him tell you all about them.
“That one's Cassiopeia…” He points to it. “That one's Lacerta…”
You giggle a little at the funny name and look at him. “Lacerta?”
“It means ‘the Lizard’.” He informs you with a grin while looking at you too.
“Of course it does.” You say playfully and look back up.
“That one is Camelopardalis…” He traces the stars to give you an idea of the shape.
“Now you're just making things up.” You tease him while looking back at his face to find him glaring playfully at you.
“It means giraffe.” He says matter-of-factly.
“Alright, you little geek.” You smile at his indignified scoff but you can see he's fighting a smile, and losing.
You look at each other with goofy smiles for a moment before you softly say, “What else?” prompting him to go on.
He looks back at the stars for a moment before he starts tracing another constellation.
That's something Bucky loves to do, like the most intricate game of connect the dots ever, and he wins every time.
Sometimes you've even made it into a game, trying to find all the stars in a constellation before the other, but he has the unfair advantage of actually knowing them all. But you always have fun playing, even if you end up behaving like children.
And looking at him right now, his eyes on the stars and his hand up to trace them with his finger, you can't take your eyes off of him and you know, out of all the constellations, he shines the brightest.
“That…” He traces the biggest constellation he's shown you tonight. “is the Ursa Major.”
His voice snaps you out of it and you look back up. He's shown you these same constellations time and time again, every time with the same passion and every time you listen intently, just enchanted by his voice.
“And that one…” He traces another one. “is Pegasus.”
Huh, that was a new one. You look at it while tilting your head. “Pegasus?”
“Yeah, that one I don't know what it means.” He chuckles, about to move on to another set of stars when you interrupt him.
“Pegasus is a winged horse from Greek Mythology.” You say before you can stop yourself.
Mythology is something you've always found fascinating and, much like Bucky with Astronomy, you've always tried to learn as much as you could about it.
Unlike Bucky, you've always kept this small passion to yourself, which is why Bucky is looking at you right now with a confused yet amused raise of his eyebrow.
“What? Can't a girl know a random fact?” You say playfully while looking back up at the stars to hide your slight blush.
“So that's all it is? A random fact?” Bucky asks, his eyes still on you and you know he can tell there's more to it. He knows you pretty well, after all.
“Maybe…” You say playfully, finally looking at him with a small smile.
“Tell me more about it?” He says softly, not pushing you to talk but letting you know he's open to listen if you want.
“Well…” You say quietly after a moment, looking back at the stars as you think about what to tell him. “Pegasus was born from Poseidon-”
“Poseidon?” He interrupts you with a small frown. “The god of the ocean?”
“Yeah…” You chuckle, looking at him. “He's also known as the God of Horses.”
“He is?” He frowns more. “Why?”
“Well, according to Greek mythology he invented them.” You explain with a smile. “He created them out of foam from the ocean in order to be elected as the patron god of a new city. But Athena created an olive tree and the citizens saw that as more useful and chose her, naming their city Athens.”
Bucky looks at you with awe, his entire attention on you now as you enthrall him with your words.
“And he was the father of Pegasus?” Bucky asks you, just wanting to hear more of your voice.
“Yeah, Poseidon was his father and Medusa his mother.” You look back up at the stars, trying to recall more details of the story. “He was born when Medusa got decapitated by Perseus. The blood from her neck fell into the ocean and, out of the white foam, came Pegasus, along with Chrysaor.”
“Chrysaor?” He asks, his eyebrows rising in surprise. “Another horse with wings?”
“No, he was a boar with wings.” You correct him. “Chrysaor comes from a name that means ‘he who has a golden sword’. Pegasus doesn't have a meaning, but it symbolizes divine inspiration or the journey to Heaven, because…”
You keep talking about Greek mythology as you look at the stars, Bucky’s eyes on you the whole time.
He finally understands why you love hearing him talk about Astronomy so much even though you have virtually no interest in it.
The way you talk about Mythology, the knowledge and the passion you show… It's breathtaking to see, and Bucky never wants to stop listening to you at this moment.
If you were looking at him you'd see the same look you have on your face when you look at him talking about the stars, the same look he has when he's looking at the stars…
He may love to stargaze, but the biggest, brightest of them all is laying right beside him, and that’s definitely his favorite.
#bucky barnes#avengers x reader#bucky barnes x you#bucky barnes au#bucky barnes x female reader#bucky x reader#bucky barnes x reader#bucky barnes x y/n#bucky x you#bucky barnes imagine#bucky barnes one shot#bucky barnes oneshot#marvel fanfiction
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Can u do early seasons spencer x reader who has a lot of problems and they let people walk all over them and they dont set boundaries and they struggle with their emotions. Reader likes spencer a lot but doesn't seek him out bc they feel like he deserves better! And u can decide what happens but make it happy ending :)
Oh my word, I literally spent like 2 hours writing this because I wrote something and then my internet cut out when I posted and now it's lost, so I had to rewrite it. Hope you enjoy!
Cw: gn reader, people dumping work on reader, Spencer being cute
Enjoy!
You were a doormat. You knew it, your friends knew it, everyone knew it. You tried to set boundaries, to say no, but it never seemed to stick. Saying no made you feel guilty, it made you feel like a bad person even though you knew you weren't.
Being a doormat, people tended to walk all over you, requesting ridiculous things of you. That is how it came to be that you were sitting alone in the bullpen, the clock ticking away, showing you that it was around midnight and you still had a whole stack of papers to go through. You felt yourself about to fall asleep, and truly, you were too tired to fight it off when a ding signaled the arrival of someone.
Without even turning to look who it was you knew it was Spencer Reid. You recognized his footsteps, and even if you didn't, the smell he brought with him would have alerted you. It was the smell of coffee mixed sweet undertones, almost as if he had spent his whole day in a café. It was intoxicating. "What are you still doing here?" "Working, I have a lot of stuff to finish before tomorrow" "you mean today" looking back at the clock you could see he was right, it was now officially the next day.
"Do you need some help?" without even waiting for you to decline Spencer took half of the pile you were working on. He moved fast, knowing you well enough to know that you hated asking for help, especially from him, he just could never figure out why.
"Spencer, you really don't need to, I've got this" reaching your hands to take the files back only to be swatted away by the doctor was something you did not expect. "I'm not saying you don't have it, I'm just going to help you so you can go home earlier"
Sighing you admitted defeat and went to go make coffee for the two of you. With Spencer's help you managed to make it through the massive stack of papers on your desk in less that an hour, something you would never have been able to do on your own.
"You, doctor Spencer Reid, are amazing, what can I do to thank you?" it was a slight tease on your part. You didn't expect him to ask you anything return, it wasn't like him, he was too nice . That was one of the things you loved about him, and one of the reasons you willed the crush growing in your heart to shrivel up and die. He deserved so much better than you. Someone with a mind as amazing as his own, someone with kindness rivaling his and someone who knew how to say no. You were none of those. At least not in your own eyes.
"You could go on a date with me" Spencer surprised himself with those words, he really hadn't meant to say them out loud, but he really liked you, and in a moment of confidence inspired by sleep deprevation, he decided to take a chance.
"Really? You mean it?" the both of you were blushing hard at this point, him thinking about how he could have possibly screwed this up and you thinking about how this could possibly get any better.
"I-I mean, only if you want to, you really don't have to feel pressured, I know I said I would take it as paiment, but honestly spending time with you was enough of a payme-" grabbing his face in your hands you turned him to look at you, shutting off his ramblings with the movement and shutting off his brain with your words
"I would love to"
#dr spencer reid#spencer reid x reader#doctor spencer reid#bau#criminal minds x reader#criminal minds fic#criminal minds#criminal minds fluff
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The Observatory
I've been rotating a piece of the TFS CE lore in my brain so long I forgot to write about it. There's no transcript yet that I can find (I might do it myself tbh if nobody else does), but here's the scans with the whole text.
So, there's a lot going on in that CE, but the main gist of it is that the whole CE is written like a report from Eido. She investigated information about the Witness and the Collapse to try and help prepare us for our inevitable fight against it. Through her investigation, she found old Eliksni databanks that contain ancient records of past civilisations; main one being discussed is the civilisation that would eventually end up becoming the Witness.
There was a lot going on with them, shown to us through discussions between two specific individuals; they're only identified through code as HNW047622 and RS6243199. I'll call them HNW and RS. I've mentioned this before because we could see one of the pages in the preview of the Collector's Edition.
These individuals talked a lot and gave us insight into the Witness' civilisation. In short, they were super advanced and had something they described as the "Gardener's tools" which they apparently used to terraform other planets. They also talk about the concept of "the final shape" a lot and lead philosophical debates about its meaning and whether or not they have a responsibility to bring that concept to others in the universe. I'll probably go into their civilisation in-depth at some point, but for now I want to go off about something that appears to be a minor detail.
As part of their conversations, In the 5th image from the scans, they extensively talk about the final shape. The RS individual mentions something called "the Observatory." It is apparently some sort of a prediction machine. Full transcript of the relevant conversation and the rest of the post under:
[RS6243199]: I agree with you, in theory, but we do not exist purely in the theoretical. This suffering is already happening now, all the time, everywhere we look. Come see me, and I will show you the Observatory's readings. Such sights as we have seen, my friend, make me sick to my soul.
[HNW047622]: I thought that the Observatory could only see possibilities. The future-branches of past visible-light readings.
[RS6243199]: We have made improvements. The glass-minds*** trim the excess branches. What we see now are the strongest paths. And in the seeing, they become true.
[HNW047622]: Then tell me what you have seen. I gain nothing from running from the truth, no matter how uncomfortable.
[RS6243199]: Cities turning on themselves in a frenzy of self-destruction. Children offering up parents in superstitious sacrifice to bloodied gods. An entire people who would boil off their own atmosphere rather than let their neighbors enjoy fresh air! Great waves drowning worlds. Bodies which do not decompose, for everything, down to the very bacteria, has died as well. Machine-plagues carving their prediction-machines into moons. Your garden, destroyed. As the Observatory saw it, so it came to pass.
The footnote is a text from Eido:
*** From the context, some sort of computational assistant? There appears to be some etymological overlap with the names of Vex Minds. Something to investigate later, perhaps!
This made me instantly lose my mind when I was reading. Very early into Lightfall's release, I made a post about the Veil and the history of the universe. It's about some very peculiar similarities between a lot of prediction technology and caches of information that preserve ancient history and ancient civilisations and how they may connect to the Veil.
Mind you, this was before we knew a lot about the Veil; I wrote this pre-Veil logs and before it was confirmed that the Veil is linked directly to consciousness and memory. It was also before Season of the Deep which gave us Akashic Revelation: a lore tab in which a Guardian tries to go through the portal and experiences a vivid flashback of memory of his own pre-Guardian life. The name of the tab is important: akashic records is an esoteric concept for a supposed existence of a record of everything that has ever happened in the universe, past or present or future, human and non-human.
This is basically what I proposed in my post, before this lore tab, about the Veil; that the Veil or some source the Veil can tap into, is something similar to that. That all of the prediction machines are essentially pulling from this same source. In the post, I mentioned the OXA machine (the "black box for galactic civilisations" that allowed the Psions to see the future), Inspiral lore book (in which various civilisations and individuals left their records in the Darkness), the Device (the machine built on Vex technology by the Future War Cult in the Golden Age, led my Maya Sundaresh, used to displace consciousness and also see the future as used by Lakshmi-2), and even maybe the Sundial made by Osiris. I also mentioned how there's a possibility that even the whole scope of Vex prediction technology is somehow based on or tapping into this same source.
I am very amused at how I wrote: "It’s also interesting that Maya Sundaresh seems to be quite involved in pretty much every aspect of this." So true past me, that really is interesting! Her connection to the Veil and Lakshmi (and the importance of the Device and FWC) will later be revealed in Veil Logs. Almost like these connections were made deliberately, between all of these machines and the Veil.
With the benefit of new lore being released in the time since I made the original post, I am even more convinced that there's something going on here, and especially after TFS CE because the section I copied here mentions yet another incredibly similar machine: the Observatory of the Witness' species. It's not described in a lot of details, but from what we did get, it's quite unmistakeable that this is similar to things like the OXA and the Device.
The Observatory is clearly shown to be some sort of a machine that can see the future. Or, rather, as HNW says, it can see "possibilities." This matches what we've seen of the Device when Lakshmi-2 was using it; she was able to see different possible futures, futures that were getting increasingly narrow and biased to what she wanted to see. Identical formatting for using some sort of a machine to predict the future is shown as well with a Psion Ixel using... something (? maybe the OXA?) to do the same.
And again, the same formatting is used this season when a Psion Qorix uses her inate Psion abilities to project visions of the future into the minds of those present at Caiatl's War Council. It's worth noting that Psions have huge ties to Darkness abilities, as well as their entire species having been influenced by Nezarec to an unknown extent, but enough for them to share psionic/psychic abilities, an affinity to void, helmets that reflect his head shape and possibly more we don't know about. It's also worth noting that Nezarec was the one who was transporting the Veil on his Pyramid ship and lamented how Neomuni were not using it to its full potential. Nezarec may have used the Veil to influence the Psions.
This is important because these devices aren't exact, and the Observatory seems to share the same caveat. It shows possibilities, not certainties. Different users might see different things, painted by their own desires and experiences. However, there's something in all of these prediction machines that can lead to a real prediction of the future. The invididual RS mentions several visions, most of which are not specific enough to identify, but sound plausible given the sheer size of the universe; they must've happened somewhere at some point. There's one specific that we know: "great waves drowning worlds." And there's one mentioned by RS that also happened; the destruction of the "garden" made by HNW. This is mentioned in the beginning of the CE. HNW terraformed a planet, but that planet was later completely destroyed.
Even more interesting, the way the Witness' species used the Observatory seems to imply that they employed the Vex directly to help them manage this machine. RS explains that the "glass-minds" are capable of "trimming excess branches" and allowing only the "strongest paths" to be explored. Perhaps this was their way of not falling into the trap that the people using the OXA or the Device could fall into; by having the Vex monitor and manage this prediction machine, it stops the user from inserting too many personal variables. And yes, as Eido noted as well, "glass-minds" is a phrase that indeed shares similarity with the Vex and is almost certainly referring to the Vex.
This is incredibly interesting for a lot of reasons. First, as I've already mentioned, these sort of prediction machines are common throughout the universe and keep being mentioned. Different species at different times have been capable of creating similar machines for similar purposes. Inspiral also goes deeper into how species could use the Darkness to access memory and history through it; the Ecumene and the Qugu had these abilities and used them as part of their civilisation. Through Psions, we get a mix of these two things; the Psions have both tangled with prediction machines like the OXA, but they also posses seemingly inate Darkness abilities that function similarly. They can project futures and possibilities to others, they can merge their minds (and bodies!), and their old religion was based on ancestor worship. Emotions, memories, consciousness itself: these are part of Darkness and governed by the paracausal entity we know as the Veil. It seems like machines capable of giving insight into the past and future are connected to the consciousness of the universe.
Second, these things somehow always come back to the Vex. We don't know how the OXA was built, but the Vex could access it. The Device was build from Vex technology and so was the Sundial. The Observatory is very closely linked to the Vex as well; either built by them or simply being close enough to be accessible for the Vex to manage it. The Vex are more or less known for their manipulation of time, their ability to move through it and use it as a tool, as well as for their prediction and simulation machines and constructs.
And of course, this year revealed to us that the Vex, or at least a part of the Vex, have tried recreating the Veil in the form of Black Heart, but failed due to their inability to understand paracausality. However, it seems like the Vex are drawn to the Veil even outside of just the Sol Divisive, as can be seen from Neomuna. The Vex were a constant threat to Neomuna throughout its existence and the Vex have been trying to access the CloudArk, an alternate reality engine built on the energy of the Veil.
This season in particular has been fairly suspicious with the Vex as well, showing us a concerning evolution of the Sol Divisive and the Vex in general; their radiolaria emitting Darkness energy, Oracles appearing outside of the Vault of Glass and also resonating Darkness, their attempts to "merge with the Witness" and a strange message that seems to be implying they're still not done with reaching out to the Veil in the form of the Black Heart. I talked about this more here.
Are the Vex drawn to the Veil for a particular reason? Perhaps they unknowingly tap into something the Veil is responsible for, like prediction, through the simple fact that the Veil is the paracausal entity responsible for Darkness which is memory? For the Vex, memory could work outside of time; perhaps their prediction abilities are simply them being able to "remember" the future, because they can exist through and outside time.
There is also the even more mysterious possibility here that revolves around a few hints in regards to the Veil and the Traveler being a single entity at some point in time. If the Veil and the Traveler used to be one before becoming separated, this may be what Unveiling talked about through metaphor; the mythical Garden before the universe existed could've been this singularity that was just the Veil and the Traveler together as one. And as Unveiling also noted, in one of those parts of Unveiling that seem to be closer to the truth than others, the Vex already existed then. The reason they're so out of place in a universe of paracausality is because they appear to have come into existence before paracausality so it is foreign to them. They might remember the time when the two were one, therefore they still have an instinctual draw to the Veil; and honestly, to the Traveler too, given how close to it they've settled in our system. As the lore on Scatter Signal notes, someone told us that all Vex agree that "Sol is Salvation." It's where both the Veil and the Traveler are.
This is beyond speculative, but it's been on my mind since that first post well over a year ago because of how closely linked Darkness, the Vex and these peculiar prediction devices have been throughout the history of the universe; now added with one more, the Observatory, most likely the first one ever made (or found), by the species that would later become the Witness. I could be off on the exact nature of this connection, but I feel like there is some sort of a connection all the same. I also feel like they wouldn't have mentioned this in TFS CE for no reason, especially because we're clearly not going to deal with the Vex until after TFS.
Either way, the Observatory mention and description really got me spiralling into unhinged territory. It added such a specific little detail about something I've speculated about before and made it fit perfectly. I wonder if this will remain just like a little curiosity and background worldbuilding or if there's a more direct reason for including it; namely if this is more hints about post-TFS stuff regarding the Vex.
Until we know for sure, I will continue to believe that all prediction abilities and prediction machines are tapping into a single source; the consciousness/memory of the universe, produced by the Veil as a part of the inherent propery of Darkness. The Vex are key to this because they may be doing it in a very specific way given their relationship to time, the possibility that they existed in the universe before anyone else, and possibly because of their memory of a time when the Veil and the Traveler were one.
It could be also something simpler and not entirely interconnected. But I was very pleased to see yet another Vex-based prediction machine being introduced into the universe, adding to the existing ones that have been fairly relevant this year and mentioned several times like the OXA and the Device. Can't wait for TFS and post-TFS content to see if this is something we'll be exploring in more detail, especially as we start dealing with the Vex!
All this about a half of a single page of TFS CE. Girl help.
#destiny 2#witness#vex#darkness#psion#the final shape#the final shape collector's edition#long post#if you click#lore vibing#this is why i didn't write anything about the whole thing yet#because all of this is just about this half a page#i would like to go more into the witness' species at some point but there's just so much stuff in the CE#anyway. me holding my breath trying not to scream about where is mercury and the infinite forest#it's just. 'glass-minds trimming excess branches' the pathways in the forest were called branches also#makes sense. because it's a forest. and the individual constructs where you entered other timelines were called trees#that's all i'm going to say about that#reading this on stream had me losing my mind live in hd#i've been insane about these connections for over a year and they just dropped another one of these shits#i heard you like the oxa. and the device. and the sundial. and the infinite forest. and inspiral. and psions. have the observatory.#well thanks. now i'm even more insane!
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Mark Lewisohn: Drug Buddy (Part Deux) - Mark explains heroin
The longer clip—which is very long and so does have some cuts of his many digressions—is so stupid in so many ways that I cannot address them now because I have to finish my real work. But I am still going to post it below the short clip. The main point is Lewisohn's certainty that John and Yoko were never addicted to heroin. And in his analysis, besides being very impressed with John's experimental ways—which I very much relate to—he opines that John possibly didn't know what withdrawal really was like when he wrote Cold Turkey and also says that John and Yoko once got off heroin by having a driver drive them across America in the back of a car and at the end “they were over it. Which must've been a trip. And a half.”
Like, literally read one single thing on heroin withdrawal, fan boi. A universal side-effect of opiate withdrawal is the alimentary canal waking up and beginning to work again, and it's messy. Always. You don't want to be in the back of a car with no bathroom or clean underwear. It's also incredibly uncomfortable, even including on the eyes, and so I hope they had some curtains on those car windows. The adjustment from the opiate-induced pinhole pupils back to full, shocked, reactivity can feel like getting your pupils dilated at the optometrist. Either way, withdrawal the opposite of sexy and Lewisohn's breathy awe makes me want to vomit.
In this little clip he talks about the Two Junkies interview and how he has figured the Get Back heroin situation out by the chronology of Spanish Tony (Sanchez) being on set 13 January, then John throwing up in the Canadian Broadcasting Corp's interview on 14 January, and then, says Lewisohn, from John being okay after he throws up. From these clues Lewisohn has deduced that John and Yoko got some from Spanish Tony the day before, did it that night after work, had a hangover the next day, and then were fine. So he has made the jaw-droppingly idiotic (and even more confident) deduction that that's how it went and that there's no evidence that they ever did it again that month.
🫠
LEWISOHN: I think it's very easy to assume that John was strung out on heroin the whole time [of the Get Back sessions]. It's very evident that he was not. He's far too creative and lucid to- to-- doesn't exhibit any signs whatsoever of being strung out. In fact, in Twickenham—I think it's the 14th of January, it's the last day at Twickenham—John begins the day with an interview set up the day before with Canadian Broadcasting Corporation, and John is kind of green in this interview. And he's- he's clearly unwell, and in fact he goes off to throw up. And we know that he's thrown up because he comes back and says, ‘I've just thrown up.’ There's no secrets with these guys. They told us everything. Um, and then he's a bit more together. His speech becomes a little bit unglued, and he just becomes a little bit more together. ... And if you look, the day before there's a picture of ... some guys around the Beatles, and one of them is Tony Sanchez. Now, he was- he was heroin supplier to the Stones. And he turns up on the 13th of January, and that night they do heroin, and the next morning John is green, and then he throws up. So there's a clear chronology there. That they've got it from Tony, and they've taken it, and he's not well. And- but there's no indication that he takes it again.
I threw together a few clips of John (and Yoko) from the Two Junkies interview. John before throwing up, John saying he's sick and the cut afterwards—that definitely does not show him saying that he's thrown up—and of him still being toasted afterwards. But if Mark Lewisohn had watched the video—actually watched it with a desire to understand it instead of projecting onto it—let alone had read anything or asked one single expert—he would be unable to talk such nonsense. Not that he's ever challenged on any of it.
youtube
Here's the longer clip where Lewisohn sprints into an embrace of full-on, mind-blowing, cringeworthily embarrassing ignorance. “And in fact I'm not sure how many times he took it...”
How does he have the confidence to say such idiotic things without ever even bothering to do a Google search? I would fear the exposure of looking like such a fool. But I know the answer. Because people listen to him and take his words on faith.
#lewisohn#delusional lewisohn#it's just a hangover#he's not strung out#mark lewisohn heroin expert#why does anyone listen to him#john lennon#yoko ono#cbc#the beatles#get back#two junkies#mark lewisohn#lewi-sins#drug buddy#beatles#spanish tony#shooting is exercise#drug detective#Youtube
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smut recs tho? 🥺👉👈
Okay. I've put this off long enough. By popular demand (five entire people which does seem like a lot) here are some Rizzles smut recommendations. I'm not outright tagging any authors this time because I don't need to be showing up in their activity page like "hi I enjoyed the sex you made."
Anyway, this is weirdly vulnerable. Writing smut for you? Totally fine. A blast. Love to do it. Love to hear all about how you liked it. Telling you what smut I read? Mortifying. Torture. But I'm gonna do it anyway. For the people.
I also feel like people are waiting for this like I'm going to drop a bunch of recommendations that are real graphic fuckin but the truth of the matter most of the time what I enjoy most is suspense, tension, anticipation, other words that mean mostly the same thing, and also big feelings (good and bad ones).
I'm not going to dwell too much on highly kudosed fics, but I do want to point out how insane it is that the top kudosed fic in the fandom BY A LOT (and locked to users only no less!!) was written by someone who wrote Rizzles one (1) time. They just casually crushed it while writing for like 50 different fandoms. They are a mystery and an enigma. And the fic is super hot, I love it.
Of course, we all know DanteBeatrice77 is the master of the E rated long fic. Your milage may vary on the daddy kink stuff, but it's always tagged (plus like who hasn't called/been called daddy a time or two? No? Oh okay, uh, my mistake). The only thing I'll say is that if you, like me, don't give one single shit about vampires, don't make the mistake of skipping on Cafuddàri. I was 100% ready to have my blood sucked after.
Frankly, many of the authors that I mentioned in the previous post also wrote my favourite smutty stuff. I realized this while going through my bookmarks. Turns out good writers are often good smut writers, who knew. If I mentioned them already and they have E and M fics, then read them. I recommend them. I am not singling anything out except to say that coolbyrne has a lot of highly kudosed fics but this one is woefully underrated and so intimate and perfect.
Now! On to some throwbacks from that other website. There's a surprising amount of smut on FF.net even with their puritanical rules. Plenty of it is in the category of very good but two fics that live inside me are the following:
Warm Milk by YoDrDeath
I almost feel bad putting this one in the smut post because I think it's exceptional way beyond that, but there's also, like, a whole lot of sex in it, so it also isn't wrong to put it here. I thought I didn't like second person POV until this fic. It's just GORGEOUSLY written. And hot. And vulnerable. And hot. I am fully obsessed with this fic. The whole point of this post is honestly to recommend this fic.
Teasers by MSonya
This is billed as a collection of one shots and the first three chapters are (and they're very good) but then after that, it's a "one shot" that turns into a ten chapter story and within those chapters is some of the best hate sex I've read. You want to read about some FRAUGHT fucking? Yeah you do, don't lie.
On AO3, here's some buried deeper in the kudos rankings that I think are great:
She's So Pretty (When She Goes Down On Me) by hopelesswanderer17
Just a good ol' fashioned super hot one shot.
Use Me by crackinois
Butt stuff one shot.
heatwave (the nearness of you) by iamthegeneralissimo
This is more build up than it is sex but it's good! Honestly it probably should have been in the other fic post but oh well.
I'm going to stop there! But hopefully you enjoy.
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In total honesty I do not remember if I made a post about this before but whatever here's one, I wrote fanfic!
It is 4 chapters long and rather short, the whole thing rounding out to 6.3k words, and is the Clone Crew's (from @rhapsoddity's VSAU) first few days outside the lab where they were made. The chapters timeline jump a little but it all happens in the same timeframe.
Chapter 1 is very short and very fluffy as Argus and Aurelius find a bonding point.
Chapter 2 is slightly longer with Solstice failing as a caretaker to Equinox and causing a panic attack, it's alright in the end though.
Chapter 3 is the longest chapter as Worm has a nightmare into panic attack flashbacks as Zed helps calm him down.
And Chapter 4 is all fluffy again as the crew is reunited and has some fun.
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Ramble on in reblogs or tags, but I wanna know what's a rarepair (or even a crackship) you have that you enjoy so much and why you like it?
#y'all already know I'm gonna say burnbunny#i wrote a whole post about it but here's some points#dragon coded lady x rabbit lady#height difference#they have the same energy and would completely vibe#they would understand each other damn it#just kiya's thoughts
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Regarding the previous post, I think the way I approach trying to evaluate a piece of art is asking "Do I think the positive things I get out of it outweigh the parts of it that I don't like?" And when I call something a "guilty pleasure" song/show/book/piece of media/etc. it's really more in the sense of, "Given who I am as a person, the flaws I've found in this should be complete dealbreakers for me, but somehow they aren't, and it makes me feel like I'm having an identity crisis."
#like. I think something like...idk shiki or cxgf excels on multiple levels. I understand why I like them. given the things I look for in art#it makes sense that these shows would speak to me because they make the effort to showcase those things I look for. because the people#in charge of those works clearly valued the same kinds of things and cared about seriously exploring them.#but with something like. uh. ctrlz. that is NOT the case and I frequently found myself going 'why would anyone make this writing#decision?' but I still sat through all 3 seasons of it! I still really enjoyed it! those flaws SHOULD have made me give up according to#personal history but they never did. and I very very much genuinely question why. I have NO IDEA why I still care about this#silly convoluted teen drama show so much. but I do. I wrote SO MANY FUCKING POSTS ABOUT IT.#I really love wicked the musical. I've heard many people call it 'hokey' or 'cheesy' or 'objectively bad' but here's the thing! I DON'T#think it's bad!!! like literally at all!!!!!! and it does do some genuinely cool things in regard to the music and the way the characters#develop and what the show says about the nature of prejudice and human connection. is it like. idk Serious™ the way that something like#Parade is? no. but it doesn't have to be. it does what it sets out to do and it does it well and this is why the whole '''objective#evaluation''' thing doesn't actually mean anything. I value thoughtfully-constructed music and dynamic female characters#(which this musical has). I value stories that deal with the complex and messy feelings that come with being a human (which this musical#has). I value stories about 'other'ness and romantic subplots that aren't just built on 'This Girl Is Pretty' (which this musical has).#and I value professional displays of technical vocal ability because I know how fucking DIFFICULT that is (which this musical...if you cast#it well...has).#if you value something else in a musical then yeah you will probably think THIS one is '''objectively bad'''#if you don't see the point of musicals as an art form you will probably think wicked is '''objectively bad'''#do you see where the problem with categorizing analysis like this is??
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"Mermaids and Other Monsters"
The lost memoir of Hiccup Horrendous Haddock the Third
...
There were legends when I was a boy.
There were legends of dragons, as tall as mountaintops and as old as the earth which raised them. There were legends of great viking heroes, who sailed the great seas and conquered great foes, singing with great booming voices that carried like thunderclaps in a storm.
Yes, there were legends. Some closer to home than others; for some of them were mine. And my legacy continues, history written into the dirt with every footstep I leave behind me; words that may wash away with the tide, but will leave a mark forever in the sands of time.
But although dragons fly the skies of my past, the oceans of my future lie vast, dark, and secret. Their depths hide history that is impossible for me to know; only to guess at, and guess again. I imagine wonderful sea dragons who have never before tasted land. Great, blind fish who have never seen the sun.
And perhaps creatures not so different from you and me, with a wonderful swishing tail in the place of two legs.
Of these, I have only heard whispers; little tastes from old sailors who touched down on Tomorrow with trades and trinkets. Sailors who have braved the Sea of the Unknown, where ships are swallowed and people disappear.
Perhaps it means nothing at all.
But I wonder...?
Night has fallen. My boat takes to those unknown waters in search of the answer, the white waves pulling me into unfamiliar territory. My crew consists only of three, accompanied by a dragon each, and we travel light.
The boat rocks, tonight, back and forth like a baby's cradle. A brisk wind blows in from the west on a harbinger's lips.
It carries the sound of singing.
#aka i remembered hiccup wrote other books so i took a title and RAN with it#httyd books#how to train your dragon books#book!hiccup#book!fishlegs#book!toothless#camicazi httyd#httyd book fanart#my art#i heard 'mermaids and other monsters' mentioned as a book Hiccup wrote in the first audiobook#and the first thing i thought was 'WAIT HICCUP MET MERMAIDS?? SINCE WHEN'#the second thought was: well of course that makes sense he was a great hero way wayyy into his reign#he must've met mermaids at SOME point if he wrote a whole book about them#so. here's my interpretation of that story!#they meet mermaids and they're kind of scary lookin but ultimately they're very strong curious and playful creatures#they have TIGER STRIIPPPEESSS#long post
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A bit from the winter here's cold and bitter please 🙏
I am incredibly pleased that that's the one you chose jess, I had a gut feeling that the btvs reference would Get you. It's my working title for the chrissy the vampire slayer au, where, of course, the sandwich is made of metal again.
He’s halfway through his second beer, typing out a message to ask where Chrissy is, because it is actually super quiet here tonight. That’s when the stranger stalks through the doors, dressed like this is a sex dungeon, and not a shitty small-town bar. Leather coat and sheer shirt, the whole shebang. Steve snorts amusedly, and sets his phone aside.
There’s something kinda familiar about him, like when you’ve seen the photo of a person online once or like he’s the relative of someone you know. Maybe he’s just got that sort of face. Steve looks for the telltale signs and oop. There it is. The stranger takes a big whiff of the place, nostrils flaring. His eyes squint immediately, and he turns to look at Steve.
Now Steve knows, any ol’ weirdo could like to smell the place they just entered, but there’s something visceral about the way they do it. Steve holds the stranger’s gaze. His eyes are shaded in the dim light. Steve thinks he has a kind face, laugh lines and all. It’d be a shame if he’s a murderous monster and Steve has to kill him.
Steve looks away when the man starts walking towards him. He takes care to do so lazily, flicking his eyes down as he picks up his shitty beer. He’s very aware of when the stranger takes off his coat and sits on the stool next to him. He smells like cigarettes and flowery women’s perfume.
The barman grunts at him, but he appears to be quite easy-going about it. “Hey man. Double tequila. Don’t suppose I could have a smoke with my drink, huh?”
Steve peeks at him from the corner of his eye. He’s fiddling with an unlit cigarette, rings flashing on his restless hands. He looks chagrined and boyish. Steve really hopes he won’t have to kill him.
A glass is slammed down on the bar, and Steve flinches a little. The stranger is unperturbed, still smiling sunnily. The barman says “No, you couldn’t,” and shuffles off, presumably so he wouldn’t have to look at them any longer.
The stranger sighs a great big sigh and tucks his cigarette behind his ears. “Goddamn smoking bans.”
Steve chooses to also interpret this as a sign that this guy is living dead. His haircut also kinda puts a date on him, because bangs? MTV metal much? But maybe Steve's just being judgy. He's prone, Robin tells him. Not everyone with questionable style is a vampire.
#wip wednesday#stranger things#metalsandwich#pushed around and kicked around#yeah. i really really should work on this again#i decided at some point I'd only start posting it if i wrote the whole thing#and i think that was wise of me bc having wips is one thing#havnng half posted wips just makes me feel bad about it#marilia for ts#i love this au so much actually steve is the better faster stronger gayer and prettier version of xander here and i am Fond of him
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okay besties, my dearly beloved potential audience of five, whoevers patient enough to be listening to me whine about this fic still: i cant get it done tomorrow which is a bummer bc it’s my fic writing (posting rather) anniversary tomorrow and i wouldve liked the Gesture of posting it then. but i’d have to rush it and i dont want to do that either actually. so im gonna aim for 30 june bc thats my tumblr anniversary and i do want some kind of Calendar moment here im autistic what do you want me to say. so thats the plan
#like i Could post ch 1 tomorrow#edit as we go one chapter per day or couple days#i could do that#but i would prefer i think to just have the whole thing done first#and im doing some dvd commentaries while im editing#and i kinda want to make a playlist for it#but like a good one#so#but i kinda wanna take the time for it#like idk how many people will read this but thats not really the point either the point is to make it mark a moment for me <3#i also wrote like a whole meta about the theme of abjection/consumption that in retrospect ive got throughout all my fics#along with the trauma#so i like that#i cant post it on the fic writing anniversary but that anniversary was somewhere in may actually anyway#bc i didnt post my first one immediately i sat on it for a few weeks#but when i started posting i started also doing meta in the chapter notes so i think#posting on my tumblr anniversary would still be a nice gesture#like i came here bc my meta didnt fit in the chapter notes anymore#would be nice to mark the two years with some meta about the stuff ive written#even if it's a little self-obsessed im in my twenties it's the age#i'll grow out of it#anyway#okay thanks for listening bye
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A pro-Palestine Jew on tiktok asked those of us who were raised pro-Israel, what got us to change our minds on Palestine. I made a video to answer (with my voice, not my face), and a few people watched it and found some value in it. I'm putting this here too. I communicate through text better than voice.
So I feel repetitive for saying this at this point, but I grew up in the West Bank settlements. I wrote this post to give an example of the extent to which Palestinians are dehumanized there.
Where I live now, I meet Palestinians in day to day life. Israeli Arab citizens living their lives. In the West Bank, it was nothing like that. Over there, I only saw them through the electric fence, and the hostility between us and Palestinians was tangible.
When you're a child being brought into the situation, you don't experience the context, you don't experience the history, you don't know why they're hostile to you. You just feel "these people hate me, they don't want me to exist." And that bubble was my reality. So when I was taught in school that everything we did was in self defense, that our military is special and uniquely ethical because it's the only defensive military in the world - that made sense to me. It slotted neatly into the reality I knew.
One of the first things to burst the bubble for me was when I spoke to an old Israeli man and he was talking about his trauma from battle. I don't remember what he said, but it hit me wrong. It conflicted with the history as I understood it. So I was a bit desperate to make it make sense again, and I said, "But everything we did was in self defense, right?"
He kinda looked at me, couldn't understand at all why I was upset, and he went, "We destroyed whole villages. Of course we did. It was war, that's what you do."
And that casual "of course" stuck with me. I had to look into it more.
I couldn't look at more accurate history, and not at accounts by Palestinians, I was too primed against these sources to trust them. The community I grew up in had an anti-intellectual element to it where scholars weren't trusted about things like this.
So what really solidified this for me, was seeing Palestinian culture.
Because part of the story that Israel tells us to justify everything, is that Palestinians are not a distinct group of people, they're just Arabs. They belong to the nations around us. They insist on being here because they want to deny us a homeland. The Palestinian identity exists to hurt us. This, because the idea of displacing them and taking over their lands doesn't sound like stealing, if this was never theirs and they're only pretending because they want to deprive us.
But then foods, dances, clothing, embroidery, the Palestinian dialect. These things are history. They don't pop into existence just because you hate Jews and they're trying to move here. How gorgeous is the Palestinian thobe? How stunning is tatreez in general? And when I saw specific patterns belonging to different regions of Palestine?
All of these painted for me a rich shared life of a group of people, and countered the narrative that the Palestininian identity was fabricated to hurt us. It taught me that, whatever we call them, whatever they call themselves, they have a history in this land, they have a right to it, they have a connection to it that we can't override with our own.
I started having conversations with leftist friends. Confronting the fact that the borders of the occupied territories are arbitrary and every Israeli city was taken from them. In one of those conversations, I was encouraged to rethink how I imagine peace.
This also goes back to schooling. Because they drilled into us, we're the ones who want peace, they're the ones who keep fighting, they're just so dedicated to death and killing and they won't leave us alone.
In high school, we had a stadium event with a speaker who was telling us about a person who defected from Hamas, converted to Christianity and became a Shin Bet agent. Pretty sure you can read this in the book "Son of Hamas." A lot of my friends read the book, I didn't read it, I only know what I was told in that lecture. I guess they couldn't risk us missing out on the indoctrination if we chose not to read it.
One of the things they told us was how he thought, we've been fighting with them for so long, Israelis must have a culture around the glorification of violence. And he looked for that in music. He looked for songs about war. And for a while he just couldn't find any, but when he did, he translated it more fully, and he found out the song was about an end to wars. And this, according to the story as I was told it, was one of the things that convinced him. If you know know the current trending Israeli "war anthem," you know this flimsy reasoning doesn't work.
Back then, my friend encouraged me to think more critically about how we as Israelis envision peace, as the absence of resistance. And how self-centered it is. They can be suffering under our occupation, but as long as it doesn't reach us, that's called peace. So of course we want it and they don't.
Unless we're willing to work to change the situation entirely, our calls for peace are just "please stop fighting back against the harm we cause you."
In this video, Shlomo Yitzchak shares how he changed his mind. His story is much more interesting than mine, and he's much more eloquent telling it. He mentions how he was taught to fear Palestinians. An automatic thought, "If I go with you, you'll kill me." I was taught this too. I was taught that, if I'm in a taxi, I should be looking at the driver's name. And if that name is Arab, I should watch the road and the route he's taking, to be prepared in case he wants to take me somewhere to kill me. Just a random person trying to work. For years it stayed a habit, I'd automatically look at the driver's name. Even after knowing that I want to align myself with liberation, justice, and equality. It was a process of unlearning.
On October, not long after the current escalation of violence, I had to take a taxi again. A Jewish driver stopped and told me he'll take me, "so an Arab doesn't get you." Israeli Jews are so comfortable saying things like this to each other. My neighbors discussed a Palestinian employee, with one saying "We should tell him not to come anymore, that we want to hire a Jew." The second answered, "No, he'll say it's discrimination," like it would be so ridiculous of him. And the first just shrugged, "So we don't have to tell him why." They didn't go through with it, but they were so casual about this conversation.
In the Torah, we're told to treat those who are foreign to us well, because we know what it's like to be the foreigner. Fighting back against oppression is the natural human thing to do. We know it because we lived it. And as soon as I looked at things from this angle, it wasn't really a choice of what to support.
#riki babbles#I had this in my drafts for ages and I was like 'not the time' but a friend encouraged me to share so here it is#palestine
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AO3 Etiquette -UPDATED
Based on both decent and not so decent replies, I have made some changes to my original post below.
It would seem a whole new kind of AO3 reader/writer is emerging and it is becoming clear not everyone quite understands how the website community works. Here is some basic guidance on how most people expect you to go about using AO3 to keep this a fun community archive that funtions correctly:
As well as likes, kudos is for when the story was interesting enough to make you finish reading. If it sucked or was badly written, you probably left. If you finished it, you liked it - so kudos.
If you really liked it, you should try to comment. It can be long and detailed or a literal keysmash. Writers don't care, we just love comments.
No critisism unless the author has specifically asked or agreed to hear it (so use your notes to say if you want some constructive feedback). Even constructive critisism is a no-no unless an author note tells you it's okay. No, posting it online is not an open invitation for that. Many people write as a fun hobby or a way to cope with, among other things, insecurity and just want to share. Don't ruin that for them. I've seen so many authors just stop writing coz they can't handle the negative emotions the critism brings, and it's only meant to be a fun thing shared for free (pointing out tagging errors is not included in this).
Do not comment to ask the author to write/update something else. It's tacky and off-putting and will probably have the opposite effect than the one you want.
There is no algorithm, it's an archive. Use the search and filter function to add/remove the pairings/characters/tropes etc. you want to read about and it will find you the fics that fit the bill.
For this to work, writers must tag and rate stories. This avoids readers finding the wrong things and missing the stuff they want. I don't care how cringy that trope is in your eyes - it gets tagged.
The tag exception is if you don't want to tag a million things or spoil your story, you can rate it as "chose not to use warnings," and maybe tag the bare minimum.
Don't censor tags. How can someone exclude a tag if the word isn't typed out correctly? There are no content bans for terms so don't censor them.
If the tags are mostly content/trigger warnings, especially if they are things considered very fucked up or graphic, you might want to use "dead dove - do not eat" to ensure people know that you're not messing around with tags and what they get is exactly what you've warned them about.
Character A/Character B means a ROMANTIC or SEXUAL relationship of some kind. Character A&Character B is PLATONIC, like friendship or family.
Nothing is banned. This is an rule because banning one thing is a slipperly slope to banning another and another, until nothing is allowed anymore. Do not expect anyone to censor for you. Because of the tags system, you are responsible for your own reading experience.
People can create new chapters and sequels/fic series any time after they "complete" a story. So it's considered perfectly normal to subscribe, even to a finished story. You can even subscribe to the author instead just to cover your bases.
Do not repost stories or change the publishing date without an extremely good reason (like a complete top to bottom rewrite or an exchange youve written for going public). It's an archive, not social media. No one cares what's the most recent, only what fits their tag needs.
Instead of deleting a story you wrote if you hate it - consider making it anonymous or orphaning it so others can still enjoy it, without it being connected to your name anymore. If you still want to delete it, fair enough.
It's come to my attention that metaworks ARE allowed on AO3, which is something I wasn't aware of. So if you do post an essay or theory, please tag it as such so others can choose to search for it or exclude it. Art is also allowed.
The only reason this archive works is because NON ONE PROFITS. Do not link to your ko-fi or patreon or mention monetary gain in any way or you violate the terms and risk having your account removed. If anyone does link, it leaves the archive open to people claiming it's for profit and having the whole thing removed.
I KNOW there's plenty more I missed but I'm trying to cover most of the basics that people seem to be struggling with.
I invite anyone to add to this, but please explain, don't berate.
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This article is from 2022, but it came up in the context of Palestine:
Here are some striking passages, relevant to all colonial aftermaths but certainly also to the forms we see Zionist reaction taking at the moment:
Over the decade I lived in South Africa, I became fascinated by this white minority [i.e. the whole white population post-apartheid as a minority in the country], particularly its members who considered themselves progressive. They reminded me of my liberal peers in America, who had an apparently self-assured enthusiasm about the coming of a so-called majority-minority nation. As with white South Africans who had celebrated the end of apartheid, their enthusiasm often belied, just beneath the surface, a striking degree of fear, bewilderment, disillusionment, and dread.
[...]
Yet these progressives’ response to the end of apartheid was ambivalent. Contemplating South Africa after apartheid, an Economist correspondent observed that “the lives of many whites exude sadness.” The phenomenon perplexed him. In so many ways, white life remained more or less untouched, or had even improved. Despite apartheid’s horrors—and the regime’s violence against those who worked to dismantle it—the ANC encouraged an attitude of forgiveness. It left statues of Afrikaner heroes standing and helped institute the Truth and Reconciliation Commission, which granted amnesty to some perpetrators of apartheid-era political crimes.
But as time wore on, even wealthy white South Africans began to radiate a degree of fear and frustration that did not match any simple economic analysis of their situation. A startling number of formerly anti-apartheid white people began to voice bitter criticisms of post-apartheid society. An Afrikaner poet who did prison time under apartheid for aiding the Black-liberation cause wrote an essay denouncing the new Black-led country as “a sewer of betrayed expectations and thievery, fear and unbridled greed.”
What accounted for this disillusionment? Many white South Africans told me that Black forgiveness felt like a slap on the face. By not acting toward you as you acted toward us, we’re showing you up, white South Africans seemed to hear. You’ll owe us a debt of gratitude forever.
The article goes on to discuss:
"Mau Mau anxiety," or the fear among whites of violent repercussions, and how this shows up in reported vs confirmed crime stats - possibly to the point of false memories of home invasion
A sense of irrelevance and alienation among this white population, leading to another anxiety: "do we still belong here?"
The sublimation of this anxiety into self-identification as a marginalized minority group, featuring such incredible statements as "I wanted to fight for Afrikaners, but I came to think of myself as a ‘liberal internationalist,’ not a white racist...I found such inspiration from the struggles of the Catalonians and the Basques. Even Tibet" and "[Martin Luther] King [Jr.] also fought for a people without much political representation … That’s why I consider him one of my most important forebears and heroes,” from a self-declared liberal environmentalist who also thinks Afrikaaners should take back government control because they are "naturally good" at governance
Some discussion of the dynamics underlying these reactions, particularly the fact that "admitting past sins seem[ed] to become harder even as they receded into history," and US parallels
And finally, in closing:
The Afrikaner journalist Rian Malan, who opposed apartheid, has written that, by most measures, its aftermath went better than almost any white person could have imagined. But, as with most white progressives, his experience of post-1994 South Africa has been complicated. [...]
He just couldn’t forgive Black people for forgiving him. Paradoxically, being left undisturbed served as an ever-present reminder of his guilt, of how wrongly he had treated his maid and other Black people under apartheid. “The Bible was right about a thing or two,” he wrote. “It is infinitely worse to receive than to give, especially if … the gift is mercy.”
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(Not so) Quiet Evenings
Summary: Lando is alone with his son for the first time
Warnings: None, just so high risk of a baby fever
Words: 1.1k
A/N
I wanted to thank you for 1k notes on Little Update. So I wrote another dad!lando to thank all of you! <3
(I wanted to put a picture with him and a baby here but this was way too cute to not post❤️)
Carmen and Lily invited you to a small baby-free get-together. Nothing too big, just the three of you sitting together, relaxing and letting loose for a bit.
This whole thing was actually Lando's idea. He wanted to get you out of the house for a bit, sensing that you needed a little break from being a mama bear.
So he asked Lily if she could invite you over to catch up and keep your mind off of things a little. Of course, she said yes, already starting to plan the second Lando asked her.
So now the Brit is sitting on the couch, watching you rush through the apartment to grab everything you need.
"Baby, you're gonna be fine, trust me. It's just Lily and Carmen."
Halting your movements, you turn to him, your phone in one hand and your keys in the other.
"I know it's just I want this to be perfect. It's been so long since I went out."
Lando stands up and makes his way over to you, stopping right in front of you.
"You're going to be ok. Enjoy your night. Me and the little muppet are going to have a great night."
Lando strokes your arms, kissing your head to calm you down.
"Speaking of the little muppet." You turn around and grab a piece of paper from the shelf behind you. "I wrote you a little list so you don't get overwhelmed by being alone."
Lando takes the paper and reads through the different points.
Try to feed him before bed. So he sleeps a little bit longer( milk is already in the bottle)
Bath him (use the blue and the green bottles on the sink)
If he gets fussy, play the F1 intro. (Works every time!)
Try to get him to bed around 7:30 p.m.
You're going to do great. You're a super dad, and I believe in you.
"Aww, you're cute."
Wrapping his arms around you, he wishes you a lovely evening and practically pushes you out the door.
Now, standing alone in the quiet apartment, a feeling of nervousness creeps up in his body. He grips the list you gave him a little tighter and makes his way into his son's room.
Gently opening the door, he smiles at his son's sleeping figure, cuddled up in his little cot. Lando walks into the room, approaches his son and gently takes him into his arms.
Henry wakes up and looks at his dad with his adorable big blue eyes, cuddling himself into Lando's shoulder.
Lando strokes his back to settle little Henry in his arms again, feeling the soft material of his little bear pyjamas between his fingers.
"Well, hello there, little man. Slept well?" He asks, earning himself a happy gurgle.
"I take that as a yes."
He carries Henry into the living room, asking him all sorts of questions on the way.
"You also think that nobody needs fish, right? Say nothing if you agree."
Hearing complete silence from the sleeping baby in his arms, he looks down to find Henry in a deep slumber again. He laughs a little at how much they already have in common, being able to sleep everywhere.
The two continue to cuddle for a bit. Lando tells him all sorts of stories until he feels Henry getting restless on his chest.
"You getting hungry, little bud?"
Henry lets out a whine, grabbing the shirt he lays on with his little fists. Lando strokes his back to settle him again, and stands up to grab a bottle from the kitchen.
"How does Y/N do that?"
In the kitchen, he currently tries to heat the bottle while holding the baby in his arms, which turns out to be more complicated than he thought, with a squirming baby in his arm.
"How about- no, that's not going to work."
"And if I just- nope, also not."
After some time, he finally figured it out. He stuck Henry into his hoodie and held him with one hand while he prepared the bottle with the other.
Now, he is sitting in your bathroom waiting for the water to be the perfect temperature.
Let's say feeding didn't go quite as planned. The food was everywhere except Henry's mouth, on the floor, on Henry, the curtains, but mainly on Lando.
So, now that both of them needed a bath, he decided to kill two birds with one stone.
The water is warm enough now, so he grabs little Henry and climbs into the tub. The warmth engulfs their bodies as he lays down.
"Yeah, that's better. Admit it, you just wanted to bathe with me."
Henry gives his dad a toothless smile and splashes him with water. Lando giggles at his son's antics and grabs the soap to start washing him.
After he washed himself and the baby, he got both of them dressed. They are both dressed in matching quadrant hoodies, something Max gifted him as Henry was born.
Land decides the world needs to see how unbelievably cute he and Henry look, so he takes a picture and posts it on his story.
Millions of messages arrive to him in a matter of minutes, but he ignores them and makes his way over to Henry's little nursery. He is fighting to keep his little eyes open, so Lando decides it is time for him to call it a night.
The second he lays him down in his crib, he starts to whine, not liking the loss of his father's warmth one bit.
So Lando picks him up again, walks to the living room and sits on the couch.
"You don't want to sleep yet, do you?"
He coos at him and bounces up and down to settle Henry a little. Happy to be in his dad's arms again, he settles back down and closes his eyes.
"Oh, so now you wanna sleep? Little evil genius, you got that from your mom."
Not wanting to wake him up, Lando decides to stay on the couch and watch some TV until Henry is sleeping deep enough. It doesn't take long for Lando to doze off, one hand on his son's back and the other under his butt, having him in a safe grip.
And that's exactly how you found them two hours later, cuddled up on the couch, the TV playing in the background.
Smiling to yourself, you take out your phone and take a picture of the two of them, definitely posting that later. But for now, you walk up to them and cuddle yourself to your perfect little family.
#lando norris x y/n#lando norris oneshot#lando norris fanfic#lando norris x reader#lando norris imagine#dad! lando norris#dad!driver#lando norris#formula one#dad!lando
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