#i learned so much from this zine
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Resolve♟️
#persona 5 royal#p5r#goro akechi#p5#3rd semester#piece for the second Goro Akechi palette zine that i never got around to posting#i never felt fully happy with it but i learned soooo much from everyone in that server#im so grateful#but yeah oh man i drew this right after finishing p5r and i was so moved by akechis resolve to be himself and make his own choices#no matter the consequences 🥺#starschfarts
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I'm so fucking excited to get all this outstanding work done, and for tax season to fuck off. I cannot wait to have more time to play games with pals, go out with friends whom I haven't seen in a few months....go to some random meetups to meet new ppl and create new connections (and perhaps snag me a new person wink wonk LMAO).
And just...have more time to live. To stop feeling as lonely as I am feeling rn. CAUSE HOO BOY, it's been hitting me hard. And I can't do too much about it CAUSE of the deadlines I need to meet!
#I have learned my lesson: no more zines. or rather. no more modding zines#as much as I love you grizz zine. the amount of work you have placed on my shoulders is too much. heck. the other mods have it worse#I dont enjoy doing overtime and coming home to work on the art for the zine that I really should have had help with :')#27 spots...thats way too much for me at least. my hands are struggling and I am getting flare ups again. and I am not including the notes#I legit havent drawn anything for me in months because of this and I just wanna draw abby n pilos cuddling!!!!!! LMAO#and I so badly want to reach out to ppl to play games with and I cant cause Im either WORKING or WORKING#I really want to stream games again too.....I REALLY want to play 999 with someone :'))))))))))) would be a fun game to share......#and the cube escape game too#AUGH I HATE BEING SO BUSY AND ALONE SOMETIMES LMAO. IDM being single but this is an instance where a partner would be nice to have to blab#but ye I am so excited for may. most things will be done and work will still be rough but more manageable!#so ye. IM so sorry if you read all this I just like talking. and I dont really have anyone to talk to rn except myself XD#(ye ye I could reach out to ppl but hm. well I am tbh LOL. but ya know. busy. haha)#also typing has been really painful lately. the only reason why these tags are ending is cause my hands are numb from typing. :')))))))))))#ok goodnight
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completed a lil crafting project I've been working on!! I wanted my FE charms and pins to have a more permanent home in my shrine, so I customized a corkboard for them ✨✨
#fire emblem#fire emblem fates#there is so much nohr bias on this board I'M SORRY HOSHIFAM........pspspsps someone run a hoshifam zine with charm merch#things i learned from this project: i don't fuck with stamps. they are so messy and if you fuck up you gotta commit to the mistake#just one of many things im working on in preparation for june >:3cccc shrine is getting a lil reno#leigh's crafting hours#overall this was enjoyable though i always do love making something more fun to look at with paint/fabric
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ooergh the temptation of new artistic mediums
#news from the cupola#especially when I have not got the time for them!!#had to take a break from needle-felting because Hand Hurty#I kind of want to learn to record podfic just because there are Very Specific stories that I want put in my ears#but also since I would be reading them then I would have to hear my own voice. and that simply ain't it.#also. also I want to make zines so very very much.#unfortunately I have no zine-sized ideas at the moment which makes that a little more tricky
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"They think I’m the least dangerous person in this car, do they? Well, they’re about to learn very differently."
Decided to redraw a moment from On the Getaway Mile by Odaigahara on AO3/ @droidofmay !
This may have taken a ridiculous amount of hours condensed into a few days and I went through it drawing cars and car interiors, but this was an absolute blast to do :D I hope I've done the fic sort of justice.
Process shots and long comparison rambles under the cut!
Welcome to my secret lair!!
I spent roughly... 18 hours working on this, the majority during this week and over the past three days, so I need to share my toils with people <3
Character/car references and page thumbnails! Featuring an incorrect scene placement and bad camera position. I reread the scene and placed it properly in the actual page. I hate drawing cars!!
I was actually the most worried about panel placement when I started this— I was a guy who only did non narrative/illustrative panel pages and layout-less comics, but it wasn't that bad with a script! I could separate beats into panels, note which panels should be emphasised/larger, and assembled that into a page.
If you compare the fic with this comic, you can see how much dialogue I edited and moments I cut out. I couldn't fit it all on without having to draw even more pages, I wish I could though! Poor Mumbo only gets one line here. I'm so sorry my darling man <3 I also gave him a slight cyborg design because his implants are really important for his character and I needed some way to visually show that, even if it's not canon/mentioned.
The colouring method for this was really fun! It's similar to my aggie rainbow painting method but with less steps, hence narrow value range. It looks pretty and gets the vibe across well though.
Rapid fire points!
I was planning to do 3 different fic comics! Not anymore!!!
This is absolutely for the hotguy comic zine applications. <3 "Can I try rizzing you up // PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE" /ref
I drew page 2 first, then 3, then 1. I think you can tell!
Mumbo is sitting on the wrong side and should have his seatbelt on. He's also not carrying the stolen laptop as described.
It's explicitly noted that Mumbo cannot scan Grian like he can with Scar. Whoops!
Transmissions from the Foundation are via Mumbo and Scar's implants, but I couldn't think of a good way to portray that.
Despite guns and weapons being mentioned, I somehow didn't get the opportunity to draw a single one.
I love hand lettering. I also hate it! I will continue to do it.
Here are the no colour pages as a thank you for scrolling <3
#goodtimeswithscar#grian#mumbo jumbo#hermitcraft#hermitcraft au#superhero au#I don't know what the typical cw tags are for no casualty car incidents but let me know and I'll tag it#same with the hostage mentions#cw gun mention#art out the oven#[scheduled]#with all my heart pls reblog if you can bcs i spent so long on this 🥺
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You know what I want to see, I want to see more of Steve, Eddie, and Robin being 1980s small town kids from Indiana, by which I mean;
Robin is The Source of Gay Knowledge purely because her parents host Hippie Christmas and she managed to sneak away to find a neat bookstore in Indiana once.
Her knowledge is not in depth. It's patchy, woven together through rumors, stories she heard or things she picked up from her parents' old pictures. She's got a handful of zines, one book, and some movies she managed to order for Family Video behind Keith's back.
She acts like she's Queen of the Queers because in Hawkins she pretty much is.
(Max and El ask her what a lavender marriage is once, something they overheard snooping around.
Robin confidentially answers that it's code for when one woman dresses up as a man, fooling officials into wedding two woman.
She does not live this down two years later when they find out what it actually means.)
Eddie doesn't spend every weekend in Indianapolis.
Gas is expensive, his busiest days of his "job" is Friday and Saturday, and he has no fucking clue what the hanky code is.
He's wearing that bandana because Metallica front singer James Hetfield has one on all their tour posters.
Eddie does make it down to a gay bar though, by accident. Rick needed some back up for a shady deal. Promised Eddie a boatload of free drugs to sell if he agreed to just stand there and look mean.
He was warned the bar they were meeting in was 'weird' and to not 'freak out' --which Eddie thought was hilarious given his nickname and general appearance, but whatever.
He doesn't understand when they get there, because it's just a bunch of hot men with hanky's in their back pockets everywhere.
Then he sees two women kissing and it clicks.
He can't out himself in front of Rick, but one of the bartenders playfully dresses him down for his own hanky, letting him know all about the code and teasing him through his embarrassment.
He's got an offer to come back and learn what color and which pocket his hanky should actually be in, a prospect Eddie was salivating at until Chrissy Cunningham up and died on his ceiling.
(He still wore the hanky, because the feeling of that bartender tugging it out and stuffing it back in might be the closest thing he's ever had to sex and he absolutely wants a repeat.
He's young and horny, sue him.)
Steve Harrington may not be academically smart but he's not dumb.
He figured out a while back that the basketball team as a unit probably crossed the queer line more than once--or at least it did before Hargrove came in.
( Brad Handly for example, went around slamming kids into lockers and screaming slurs like a fucking movie villain one Monday because the varsity team got dead drunk at Laura's party on Sunday and hey, look, there weren't that many girls there, okay?
They all had fucking hands and mouths. Everybody but Tommy was single and hot to trot. Nothing gay about it.
Its not even like they were kissing or treating each other like chicks. It was just Brad's first time and they got to tease him later for overthinking it.
Dude graduated soon enough after and given Steve was on the team as a sophomore, he hadn't thought about the guy and why he might be freaking out so bad in years.)
Robin's entire panic attack at Starcourt, and a few more after had Steve replaying that whole incident. Reframed it a bit, and, yeah.
In retrospect that had been extremely gay, actually.
It sat with him a lot easier than he'd thought it would. Partially because of Robin, but mostly because that's just who he was.
Stranger things had happened to Steve and this one didn't want to kill, maim or otherwise eat him, so it got filed under 'interesting facts he should never tell his parents if he wanted to keep his trust fund' and then he went about his day.
(Or he tried too, anyways.
It caught up to him when Eddie and Robin somehow figured out the other was queer and dragged him along to some bar Eddie had a standing invitation at, with demands for Steve to do what he did best.
Babysit.
Their magical trip was utterly destroyed when Brad Handly happened to be the very same bartender who had given Eddie the invite.
Considering Brad's immediate bark of laughter followed by a hug and introducing himself as "Steve's gay awakening", Steve ended up having to speedrun through Eddie and Robin both having a crisis for him.
It didn't help that Steve had politely, and laughingly, corrected Brad with a casual;
"Pretty sure that was Tommy man, but if it helps I think that tongue of yours gave Matt Burdon a crisis."
--which ended up with him answering a lot more gay sex questions with Brad than he cared too.
At least he, through Brad, was able to help Robin connect to some local lesbians and--after a second crisis from Eddie regarding how Steve managed to have more sex than "the resident town freak and guy who actually knew he was gay, Steve!"-- even helped Eddie out by catching the metalheads tongue with his mouth later that evening.
The last one landed him a boyfriend, trust fund be damned.)
#this started as thought and ended as a mini fic#filing this under shit I'm not expanding on#steddie#platonic stobin#its the “Eddie and Robin drag Steve to a Gay Bar” trope but with a twist#the twist is that Steve skipped his gay crisis entirely#and also that basketball team is not straight#steve harrington#eddie munson#robin buckley#I just want to re-invoke that pre internet feeling of "No one has an easy way to google whether or not their friend is right#so it comes down to who sounds right LOL#or whose known for what
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...what must we do for you to learn what happened in Shanghai?
I have received SO many questions about this 0_o
Hm, I’ll tell you what, I’m considering creating a Patreon in which I’ll include extra Replica content (mostly art pieces with written excerpts/summaries). CHECK FOR POLL BELOW. It would just be fun/dramatic flavor scenes that are not important to the plot of Replica. Things like:
what actually happened in Shanghai
drama after Leo discovers they had been keeping the truth of the key from him
more Central Park Colony tom-foolery
raising baby Junior
creation of Omega and Donnie's interaction with him
Mind you, these are all things that would normally be too much for me to do for on top of Replica, as a lot of my free time is already dedicated to this comic (and I am very slow). But this could help me a lot with extra expenses and would be a nice way to cover a few things I don't feel I'd have the time to do in the actual comic. It would also be an opportunity to see comic updates in advance and possibly tutorials.
We shall see though. I don’t want to proceed with it further until done with the holiday special and some other Zine work. Once I'm back on the usual updates I'll have to figure out a possible schedule and if it's truly doable. But let me know if you would actually be interested in this, because it would really help with my decision!
#resisting the knee jerk reaction to doubt anyone would want to pay for my content#poll#rottmnt replica#replica#rottmnt#what happens in Shanghai stays in Shanghai#patreon#tmnt#kendra#donnie
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Reclaiming "Female" Through Therianthropy
This is my submission for the "My Gender is Not Human" zine. Here, I discuss how I realized I was not transgender because of my therianthropy and I hope that maybe someone else may relate and understand themselves in a new way. ♡
If you want to wait to read this until the Zine is released, then do not continue past the "keep reading" portion. Otherwise, enjoy!
PS: If this interests you, I'd strongly advise playing Shelter 2 (where I got the photo below from) as it relates a lot to my own experience.
CW: Body issues, misogyny
Can you imagine the scent of the velvet fuzz of a newborn animal? The experience of a dark den now filled with new life, life that hasn't even opened its eyes yet to the winter world just outside? Can you imagine the tiredness yet sheer love and comfort of having your children welcomed into the world, witnessed only by you and the Earth’s soil?
It's something I often dream of, and it's that very experience that made me realize that I am not transgender. It's funny because in this community, it feels as though the majority of individuals here are transgender and that experience ties closely into their nonhumanity. For me, the opposite occurred. I had a top surgery letter in my hand after years of feeling “not quite right” in my body or in how people perceived me. I had every reason to feel this way and to want this, even if it felt imperfect. Looking back, I remember how I got to this point.
“Be skinnier any way you can, it’ll make you prettier” they’d say as they, themselves, were ironically obese and I loved them no less for it.
“Grow your hair long and change your clothes, you’ll look more like a lady.” A projection rooted in the ideals of someone who reads far too much Jane Austen.
“Women should be subservient and provide endlessly, or they’re selfish.”
Dread set in every time I filled someone’s coffee or plate of food due to expectation or demand and not out of love and kindness. Everytime the topic of how I looked in a dress or how my hair wasn’t as long as someone else wanted. The disappointment of my family when they learned I had dated other women in the past and their relief when I dated one man. The eyerolls and my teacher’s discouragement when I expressed an interest in physics or chemistry. Even my finance degree was achieved through apparent luck despite graduating top of my class. Every “right” I accomplished was met with a “wrong” in some new category. The very things that made men impressive made me disobedient. I starved myself to look a little nicer to strangers, cried in bed after being talked down to at work, slept away all of my sorrows in a curled up ball. Humanity didn’t take kindly to me.
It frustrated me, and combined with my general lack of identity at the time along with diagnosed CPTSD, it was easy to relate to the plight that transgender individuals experienced. Surely that had to be me, but the label and being perceived as something besides female never clicked entirely. I figured that I may just have mild gender dysphoria instead, but for the first time, I really deep dived into what it meant to identify as a gender as everyone was needing urgent, permanent decisions to be made on my end. Around this time, I took on my first mammal label which was a feline. Ironically, cats are often the first animals to be associated with femininity and to be mistreated because of it.
I wanted motherhood, but I wanted my own kittens to rear more than I felt like I wanted to raise a human infant after spending time in a daycare and at a cat shelter. I didn’t want my breasts, but not because I wasn’t a girl, that’s just how other animals are. Perfume was a method to mark the rooms I had been in, not for elegance. I still felt so female, yet I didn’t see another way out besides transitioning until it occurred to me: what if I didn’t have to be a “woman”, and instead, I could simply be female the way animals are female?
There were so many women like me such as in Brave, Princess Mononoke, Poor Things, or Wolf Children. The women who strayed from polite society to walk their own paths and stuck to their own desires. Even my own cat was female and yet held her chin so high and demanded when she would or would not be held. This realization was the first time I found myself feeling feral freedom and uninhibited beauty in the way I was. I was going to be the woman that rolls in the dirt, who is unapologetically beautiful in her own way, who chases after whatever her wild heart desires. I am not transgender, but I am not entirely a woman. I am an animal, and I am female in all of its unbridled ways.
Shedding my domestic cat label, I have taken up the title of bobcat. With it, I swear on my name that I will bite the hand of any who wish to tame or domesticate me ever again. I have been released out of the crate and back into the wilderness where I belong, and I shall never look back down the mountain. I feel the moss beneath my paws, the cold breeze kissing my nose, the smell of rain soaked woods and wildflowers. Ravens cry as I run on four legs towards the peak, released at last from the grips of mankind. I feel the warmth of a life suddenly worth living, growing along with the hair I now reclaim as my own fur without shame or expectation. I am home at the summit of my own world.
My spirit runs wild, and she is female.
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Tattooed Steve, pt. 2
Part 1 here
Soooo I ended up writing more tattooed Steve. I couldn’t resist. I also realized that Eddie would be the first person to find out but like…other than Robin. But I didn’t count her because Steve and Robin are the same person honestly at this point. Anyway I hope you like it! Pt. 1 is linked above.
—-
It’s two weeks after Vecna when he gets his first one. It’s unexpected, impulsive even, but Steve needs to feel something. He has just spent the past week and half waiting for Eddie to wake up, staring at his pale form, wishing away the anxiety with every beep, beep, beep that comes from the heart monitor. Begging for this stupid, stupid man to wake up.
He isn’t really sure why he wanted Eddie to wake up. Sure the ruggrats love him, and there is the general sense of not wanting any innocent person to die on his watch, but Steve knows deep down it’s about something else. Or more like the potential of something else. He tries not to think about it too hard.
So during that first week and half of watching a comatose Eddie, Steve takes his time studying the man. Learning every curve, and every scar. And eventually, every visible tattoo he can see. They are interesting, not all of them good, but all very Eddie. It somehow makes them better. Some of them are messed up from the bat bites (ironically the bat tattoos remain untouched), but they add to his aesthetic if Steve is being honest with himself.
When Eddie wakes up after that week and a half, groggy and confused (especially towards the fact that Harrington is practically holding vigil at his bedside), the first thing Steve says to him is “Oh thank god you’re awake.” The second is “What the hell were you thinking?” Before Eddie proceeds to pass out again.
Later, when all of the doctors and family and friends have had their time with him, the third thing Steve says to Eddie is, “Tell me about your tattoos.”
And despite the fact half of them are mangled, Steve doesn’t think he has ever seen anyone light up that bright in his life. And when Eddie starts waving his hands in excitement, Steve can’t help but think that he’s never been so close to the sun before.
So, two weeks after Vecna, Steve makes a decision. Or again, if he’s being honest, an impulse. He finds old books in the library about tattoos (which aren’t very helpful), and finds zines hidden between the pages (much more helpful) on stick and pokes.
Steve shows up with supplies from Melvad’s (for a probably very dangerous tattoo kit) at Robin’s doorstep. “Robs, I need you to give me a tattoo.” Then she proceeds to spit all of her morning tea on him.
After a lot of shouting “Did you hit your head again dingus? Oh my god did you get into another fight? Are you having a break down? SPEAK STEVE.”
And a lot of convincing, “Robin I’m fine. No I’m not having a breakdown. Robs, Robbie, Birdie, I swear nothing happen. I just want to do it.”
The end up on Robin’s bathroom floor (because of course all important things happen on the bathroom floor), with a look of deep concentration on her face. “I can’t believe you’re letting me do this, with only twenty minutes from a zine you smuggled out of Hawkins Library. I can’t believe they even have zines.”
“I don’t think they were aware of it honestly.” Steve snorts. His shirt was off, a patch hair already shaved off right where is heart is placed.
“Do you know what you want?” Robin asks, head tilted.
“No, not really. I was hoping you would help.”
Robin hums, like she’s resisting the urge to point out how impulsive he’s being. Like she knows he needs to do this. “Tell me what made you decide to want one.”
So Steve does. He tell her about waiting for Eddie to wake up. Wondering why Eddie got them. Wanting to own himself again, to actually like something new on his body. Put something there he had control of. His curiosity of if it were painful. His interest behind the stories of Eddies tattoos. How Eddie lit up so bright when asked. Wanting to feel like that. Wanting to be close to the sun again.
Robin mercifully didn’t look too deeply (or at least didn’t push on it) about the interest in Eddie himself. “Okay, I think I got it. Just…hold still.”
Twenty minutes later, after three passes with pen ink and a needle, Robin disinfects his tattoo. Before she covers up, she asks “Do you want to see it?”
Steve nods his head eagerly. The tattoo had painful, more painful than he expected, but he found it sort of grounding. Something to keep him aware of himself, almost as if he was able to grasp parts of himself he wasn’t conscious of before.
When Steve stands up to look in the mirror, there he sees off center on his chest, a wonky little sun. It was something a preschooler could have drawn, but it was one of the most beautiful things Steve had ever seen, and it was made by one of the most important people in his life.
Robin says shyly at Steve’s speechless state, “You said you wanted to be close to the sun again.”
Steve scoops Robin up in an instant, ignoring the stinging both on the outside and inside of his chest. “Thank you Birdie.” Which translates, you are the only person I ever need etched in me forever.
“Always, Stevie.” Which means, you’re never getting rid of me anyway.
They pull away with tearful smiles, and silent promises. Steve can start to feel maybe not much like his old self, but somewhere on the way to who he truly is.
Then Robin says, “Okay, me next.”
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okay I wasn’t sure if really anyone wanted more, or if I was going to do it but I actually really enjoyed where this ended up. Also I apologize for any tense changes. I quite literally type this on my phone and say screw it, without looking it over. Let me know if you want more maybe? Send me prompts even. Thanks for reading :)
#steddie#Steve and Robin would feed into each other’s impulses#Steve just needs someone to tell him he’s loved and also still pretty#steve harrington#robin buckley#eddie munson#steddie fic#ficlet#platonic soulmates stobin#platonic stobin#stobin headcanons#stranger things#someone draw this#steve x eddie#tattoos#tattooed steve#the party#steddie writing#writing prompt#soft boys
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Punk History Resources: Vol. 1
This is a compilation of resources found and recommended by various alternative bloggers, each of whom are credited for their contributions. This started because I was getting SO MANY asks about resources such as videos, books, and websites to use to learn about punk history. Admittedly, my own list isn't that long, so I thought it was best to reach out to some others and share their knowledge with everyone. So thank you again to everyone who helped out with this!!
@raggedyfink @lovintheaesthetic @punk-patches @my-chemical-ratz
YOUTUBE:
Punk/Goth Docs Playlist on Youtube (77 Videos) (raggedyfink)
1991 The Year Punk broke (lovintheaesthetic)
She's Real (Worse Than Queer) (lovintheaesthetic)
Don't Need You, The Herstory of Riot Grrrl (lovintheaesthetic)
The Long Queer History of Punk (lovintheaesthetic)
The very Black History of Punk Music (lovintheaesthetic)
Punk's Not Dead (lovintheaesthetic)
BOOKS:
Phantoms the Rise of La Deathrock (raggedyfink)
Too Tough to Love by Roxy Ramone (raggedyfink)
I Slept With Joey Ramone by Mickey Leigh (raggedyfink)
Please Kill Me, The Uncensored Oral History of Punk Rock (punk-patches & lovintheaesthetic)
Encyclopedia of Punk (punk-patches)
The Day the Country Died: A History of Anarcho-Punk, 1980-1984 (my-chemical-ratz)
The Heebie-Jeebies at CBGB's: A Secret History of Jewish Punk (my-chemical-ratz)
Sellout: The Major-Label Feeding Frenzy That Swept Punk, Emo, and Hardcore (lovintheaesthetic & my-chemical-ratz)
Tranny: Confessions of Punk Rock's Most Infamous Anarchist Sellout (my-chemical-ratz)
Punk Rock: An Oral History (my-chemical-ratz)
Girls to the Front: The True Story of the Riot Grrrl Revolution (my-chemical-ratz)
Queercore: Queer Punk Media Subculture (my-chemical-ratz)
Queercore: How to Punk a Revolution: An Oral History (my-chemical-ratz)
Spider-Punk: Banned in D.C.(this doesnt have anything to do with history but i love spider punk so) (my-chemical-ratz)
MOVIES / DOCUMENTARIES:
The Punk Singer (punk-patches)
Queercore: How to Punk a Revolution (punk-patches)
Punk's Not Dead (punk-patches)
Pansy Division: Life in a Gay Rock Band (punk-patches)
Queercore: How To Punk a Revolution (my-chemical-ratz)
Afropunk (my-chemical-ratz)
Punk in Africa (my-chemical-ratz)
A Band Called Death (my-chemical-ratz)) (link courtesy of @wrench-p, but is unavailable to watch in the US))
ARTICLES:
(some of these are found on JSTOR, but you can sign up for a free 100 articles per month)
Muslim Punk in an Alt-Right Era (my-chemical-ratz)
A History of Punk (my-chemical-ratz)
Jews, Punk and the Holocaust: From the Velvet Underground to the Ramones: The Jewish-American Story (my-chemical-ratz)
What is Punk and Why Did It Scare People So Much? (my-chemical-ratz)
An Account of a South African Punk Rock Music Collection (my-chemical-ratz)
Queer As Punk: A Guide To LGBTQIA+ Punk (my-chemical-ratz)
Did Punk Matter?: Analyzing the Practices of a Youth Subculture During the 1980s (my-chemical-ratz)
ZINES:
(some may not be *about* history, but they’re a huge part of it!)
Punk Planet archive (my-chemical-ratz & safety-pin-punk)
Queer Zine archive (I personally like the anon boy collection haha) (my-chemical-ratz)
Archive.org in general has a lot of zines :) (my-chemical-ratz)
ETC:
(These aren’t about punk history itself but could be helpful in learning about the politics that go with being punk)
A History of Punk from 1976-78: A Free Online Course from the University of Reading (safety-pin-punk)
Punk History Reading List (safety-pin-punk)
Essays about socialism (my-chemical-ratz)
Leftism 101 (my-chemical-ratz)
Rights as an American protester (my-chemical-ratz)
Social justice classes (I’m really excited to go through these!!) (my-chemical-ratz)
Stamped (my-chemical-ratz)
How To Be An Anti-Racist (my-chemical-ratz)
Nice Racism: How Progressive White People Perpetuate Racial Harm (my-chemical-ratz)
I would love to make a Vol. 2 post at some point in the future, so if you have resources and want to share, PLEASE message me!!
#punk 101#punk culture#punk history#punk#punx#punk resources#resource list#friends!!!#making this post legit made tumblr crash on my desktop soo uhhhh let me know if anything is fucked up please!
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my second contribution to the binary stars zine.
sadly the fic, WHICH IS RLY GOOD, never got posted [long story, not mine to tell ;u;] but this was a telepath!keith/blind!shiro AU. basically keith is a captured BoM, and is sent to the arena in chains to be executed by a beast, but then a blind galra is thrown in to the arena was well, with a weapon. keith is able to convince him they can work together and using his telepathic link, shiro is able to defeat the beast.
afterward, they are thrown together more often in the arena and over time keith learns shiro is actually a human who has been experimented on and altered heavily. he also ends up teaching him about galra culture and how to navigate some of the wierd shit galra go thru [since shiro is experiencing a lot of galra instincts lol].
meanwhile the BoM are working on freeing keith, but keith will not leave without shiro :')
so in this scene, we have keith tracing coordinates on shiro's back, in hopes that he will be able to use them to escape. i do hope viper posts this fic one day but if not, just know it was rly good and liek the perfect slowburn.
extras under the cut!
so as i keep saying this was a rly good fic. i had like 5 diff scenes i rly wanted to draw but i realized i was NOT going to be able to fit any of them into only 3 pages lol… that didn't stop me from TRYING more than once tho…
attempt #1, 3 pics:
this scene is them bathing [PLATONICALLY] after a round in the arena. keith is lamenting about shiro geting hurt due to keith's reckless fighitng style leaking into shiro thru the mind meld, and thinks about how shiro still moves like he has his human body too, which shiro picks up on thanks to the mind link [which is something of a habit at this point lol]. shiro is angsting about the fact he actually dosen't know the extent of what has been done to him thanks to the injury that blinded him, and after asking to see how he looked as a human, keith ends up reassuring him that he's still a cutie lol.
the page with the dialogue only is when i realized there was no way i was fitting that scene into 3 pages lol.
attempt #2:
this scene is basically near the start to the fic. keith is brought in to the arena and chained to a pylon. he hears a bunch of rly loud monster noises and pounding at the door across the arena and is like, wow i am actually fucked 8D then shiro is brought in and thrown to the ground, along with a weapon. keith watches him try to feel around for the weapon and realizes he's blind, then calls out to him. shiro immediately goes into attack mode but keith is able to convince him that they can be allies, and briefly explains he's a telepath before melding their minds so that shiro can see through his eyes, and after a bit of clumsiness they are able to beat the beast this way :D
my designs for the boys. i have unclothed versions too that show off all their markings and scars but i feel like that would get the post flagged so these will have to do lol. i did post them on twitter tho, if you wanna bother looking there. also yes, this design is rly similar to the other contribution i did for this zine, which is because i rly like the idea of keith having these specific markings LOL. this is p much my official go to glara!keith design.
just two lil chibi guys
i actually finished this with shading, but for the life of me cannot find it, so old phone pic it is. this is post-fic, after shiro joins the bom. [so uh not so shocking spoiler, they both survive and escape lol]
#myart#art backlog#myart:vld#voltron#sheith#keith#shiro#galra!keith#galra!shiro#kinda lol#telepath!keith#blind!shiro#i still love this story so damn much#i might have to go grab my zine to reread it after this lol;;;#also i actually don't think i ever posted this cos i was waiting to see if my friend felt up to posting her fic#so uhh yay 'new' art
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AND HERE WE ARE! My project for the gw2 'zine!
Featuring Baruhn, reflecting on his life so far, the challenges, the small sparks of joy, the horrors, loss and gain.
For clarification's sake; I did in fact plan to depict every stage of Baruhn's life, but uuh. File was already too big.
Might do a series of short comics (graphic novels?) though, because i fking love storytelling.
Let's look at my idiotic level of detail a bit, eh?
[Long Text Ahead]
Baruhn's story begins in the Plains of Ashford. An unsuccessful attempt to stem the tide of Ascalonian Ghosts leads to the demise of many year-long allies. Dozens of brave soldiers gave their life for a mere week of peace until the ghosts reformed. They always do. Soldiers don't.
Shaken in his faith in the Legions, the first seeds of doubt arise.
Until finally he found someone to trust with his pain. In a tavern at the edge of the Black Citadel, he gets to know this odd fellow, who is continuosly follow by the faint smell of sulfur. Although Baruhn knew where that path led, the warmth radiating from the old veteran in front of him was not only a physical, but an emotional one.
With the Three Legions busy with their internal quarrels, fighting over an empty promise, Baruhn took the first steps down a previously thought to be dark path.
Surprisingly, die Flame Legion was welcoming, their fires offered light and guidance, the embers igniting the skies like stars. Surely this was better than the cold metal over the Black Citadel.
Baruhn took to learning first, handling the small flames with ease after years of throwing fireballs at ghostly shapes. Then, he figured out how to teach, and that is where the real magic comes from. Nurturing a flame, protecting it from harsh winds, adding a bit of kindling and coal here and there. He even taught the more elusive ways of magic that wield smoke and ash.
Baruhn knew about the war, the countless lifes lost on the other side of the fence. But those were humans, and here he was among family.
That is, until he met Molly.
After a small recon mission that was assured not to be much of a hurdle, Baruhn found himself alone in a forest. The small fires he conjured for light and warmth only drew in the nearby villagers. Those with pitchforks and torches, with crude swords and a thirst for blood. He couldn't really bring himself to hate them, this was war after all. But at what cost are these battles to be won?
Trying to escape the villagers was a futile attempt. He sank to the ground, his own hot blood dousing the little flames beneath his weary head.
For some reason - maybe hope, maybe resignation - he forced open his heavy eyes, only to discover his wounds cleaned and bandaged with fragile white cloth. A small human girl, of all things in this damned forest, tried to help. Even in his weakened state, even with just one hand, Baruhn could have easily grabbed her and cracked her skull. But the only thing he did was listen. He listened to the ramblings of the small human, going on and on about faries made of leaves and gnomes of stone. She called him "bear".
When the villagers came, they saw the girl at his side. That was all it took for them to turn on her. She was to be executed like that beast that now slowly stepped in front of her. For the first time, Baruhn spoke to the girl. "close your eyes."
Fire roared, not red, not orange. not a warm, welcoming fire. Not one that belongs in a hearth, that thrives in the arms of a family. This was so much worse. This was years of inner conflict, of doubt, of closing his eyes on the other side of the fence. For the first time in his life, this was the only thing that he wanted to do, protect the little insignificant human behind him. Fire roared, and it burned wood and it burned flesh.
Baruhn picked up the little girl, she held tight to his horns, nestled in his mane. He ran for hours, years of military training finally useful. The little girl, Molly, lost her mother years ago. She burned in the fires of a war she tried to escape. "And your father? What about your family?", he asked between deep breaths. Molly was quiet for a while, then whispered, her voice barely audible, "My father burned today."
They stayed together, for quite a while. He protected her, and she, with her head full of stories, and a book full of dreams, protected him.
Things came, things went. Baruhn rejoined the High Legions, acting as a spy for Ash, keeping an eye on Iron and Blood.
Baruhn ultimately took on his role as Novice, then Archivist, then Commander. He helped during the struggles against Scarlet. A small flame here and there, some shrouding smoke, a well timed lightning strike. It was other people that finally defeated Scarlet, but he was always in the background, with all the small things at just the right time.
Mordremoth came, but with him new allies.
It was but a small tangent in the grand scheme of things. Watching the fragile sapling while waging war on the jungle itself.
Their relation was something more than friendship, something else than love. They were there for each other when they needed to be. Be it only to keep a flame burning or to banish the voices to the back of the head again, they walked the same path for a long time.
Tarir, the Egg. Aurene. A new flame entrusted to him, his to nurture, his to raise. A gamble, again. What if that little flame would some day devour the world? But Baruhn did, what he could do best. Teach.
Darker times came. Caudecus and the White Mantle. The raid on the Mursaat's prison. Then facing the last Mursaat himself.
Balthazar came, and in his wake a new kind of fire. A war, similar to the ones Baruhn had seen before, but still different. A war without a cause, war for war's sake. War against nature, against the world, like a child lashing out when there were none to help them up. Maybe Balthazar's flames were not too different from his.
After the festering swamp that Joko was, came the mountain, Kralkatorrik. Death was not a hindrance anymore, not for the Commander and his dragon. The story went as the story goes.
When it came to face the frost, the whispers, Jormag. Everything fell apart. Jormag pried into the deepest, darkest corners of Baruhn's life, dragged every doubt, small as it may have been, into the light. In the ice, every truth was warped, encased in whispers, in lies. It suffocated any hope and planted even darker seeds than anyone thought possible.
It was the spirit of the Raven that aided Baruhn. Even the black feathers of its wings were shimmering like rainbows in the moonlight.
A small piece stayed with him, just a fragment. Nevermore.
After that, the stars themselves. Astralaria.
So many stories that make a life, so many pieces. Every encounter, every step along the way is another fragment of the whole. People are made of other people, that is what it means to be alive.
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Trans Horror Authors
My January reading challenge is to read a book by a trans author. Luckily, there are many out there to choose from! Here are some who write in the horror genre, because that's my area of expertise. If you know of others, whether in horror or other genres, reply with your recommendations!
In no particular order...
Caitlin R. Kiernan
A genderfluid Irish-American paleontologist who also writes spectacular cosmic horror, what's not to love? They've been repping queerness since the 80s and have a robust library to choose from, so you're bound to find something you'll like!
Poppy Z. Brite
Billy Martin, whose work is published under the name Poppy Z. Brite, was a big name in the Gothic horror scene of the 1990s and continues to be a frequently-recommended author, although he doesn't publish as much horror these days.
Julya Oui
A Malaysian trans woman and prolific short story author. She has several collections out that you can browse, if short stories are your speed! Maybe start with Taiping Tales of Terror, which draws heavily on her native folklore and influences.
Rivers Solomon
A nonbinary, intersex Black author now living in the U.K., Solomon has three books out and they all look spectacular. Their books lean more toward sci-fi/fantasy, but their newest title Sorrowland looks to be pretty solidly Gothic as well.
Gretchen Felker-Martin
Trans woman, film critic, and unapologetically outspoken. Her best-known book is Manhunt, a post-apocalyptic horror tale that doesn't pull any punches. She's got another new release slated for 2024 to keep an eye on.
Hailey Piper
One of the most prolific authors I can name off the top of my head, Hailey also has several novellas out in the world + a few novels. If the intersection of queer fiction, body horror, and cosmic horror sounds like your thing, you can find something in her backlist. Also she's here on tumblr, go learn more at @haileypiperfights
Eve Harms
A bit of a new player on the field, but well worth checking out. Eve is a Jewish trans woman. Her debut novel, Transmuted, is a breathless body horror romp. She also makes a bunch of handmade zines, which I just think are neat :)
Natalie Ironside
One of Tumblr's very own better-known names, Natalie is queer, disabled, trans, hilarious, and author to at least three novels I can think of plus some other stuff too - go scope her out on @natalieironside for the details.
.....I know I'm missing a ton of people but these were the first ones that came to mind. I have to get back to writing, but I hope this inspires y'all to pick up a book you haven't read yet, and to add to my list down in the notes.
Happy reading, y'all :)
#book club#reading recs#bookblr#trans authors#lgbt horror#trans horror#book recommendations#reading#amreading#seriously y'all if you people read non-horror#please leave some trans author recs#there are people in my book club#who need non-horror ideas#for some reason#:P
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I originally made this zine back in October. There was no particular impetus for it except I think I’ve just been low key constantly thinking about ghost bikes since I learned about them some years ago.
I rewrote some parts of this a few times and I’m still not happy with it, but it feels kind of pointless to keep fiddling with it. There’s too much I want to say and 8 pages isn’t enough.
Saying that drivers “choose” vehicular manslaughter sounds aggressive. I know (most) drivers don’t intend to do harm, but it doesn’t actually matter what their intentions are if someone gets hurt or is killed. Maybe drivers aren’t “choosing” to kill, but they are choosing to get gigantic vehicles and to go fast enough to kill.
Most recent cyclist deaths in the Seattle area have been on common biking routes, though none of them have bike lanes (Seward Park Ave, Spokane St, Marine View Dr). I’ve biked on all of these, some of them very frequently. It sucks passing by each time and knowing someone died there, and that it could’ve been avoided.
Basically everyone I know who bikes has been hit by a car at some point. A friend was hit while in a crosswalk a few months ago. (In a similar incident, a 13-year old kid was killed in a crosswalk last year.) Thankfully, no one I know has died yet. It does sort of feel inevitable though.
Recently, a car ran a red light and hit a bus. The bus was forced onto the sidewalk, where it killed a pedestrian. I walked by on my way home with groceries 5 minutes after this happened. Couldda been me. Everyone is a pedestrian at some point, but so many people avoid living life as a pedestrian. They drive everywhere and are only ever on foot within a building. My high school was one (1) mile from my house, but I had to drive to get there because of the 6-lane highway between us.
The problem is complicated. I mostly blame infrastructure, but that’s not easy to fix. We designed and built whole cities around cars and left no space for people, and that can’t be corrected without a lot of money and political will. We need roads that are “inconvenient” for cars and drivers. Ones that are narrower and have speed bumps and “traffic calming” devices slow drivers down by design, without relying on speed limit compliance or enforcement.
Seattle is cramped as hell and there aren’t sidewalks in a lot of places. But in order to build sidewalks and bike lanes, we need to take away space from cars, and hell gets raised every time anyone even suggests taking away parking, much less an entire travel lane. Lots of people depend on cars, but that’s never going to change without cities investing in the alternatives.
Buses and transit can become reliable. Bikes offer a lot of the same freedom and personal autonomy as cars. “No one wants to bike in the rain/cold/hills/etc” and yet Seattle has such a robust cycling community, both in commuters and recreational cyclists. “You can’t haul groceries/supplies/kids/dogs/etc by bike,” and yet so many people do.
And if people don’t feel safe on bikes, it’s just because of all the cars.
RIP Steve Hulsman, who was killed at the intersection of Marine View Dr and 46th Ave, the intersection in the photos, on December 21st.
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WHAT DO YOU MEAN IT'S 2024?!?!
next, you're gonna tell me it's gonna be some made-up year like "2025" next. tch, imagine that.
anyways, whoo! 2023! compared to both 2022 and 2021, i gotta say, my art style took a hard swerve in some direction this year. i mean, look at that klavier from january and that butch kim from just this december! (granted, i heavily referenced the portrait of butch kim but still, i didn't use to paint! mama mia!)
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the way i drew faces has definitely changed, that's what i get for getting into something that's live-action and into smth that has realistically proportioned art lol
OH! OH! HOW COULD I FORGET!!! IT WAS (and still will be) THE YEAR OF THE OLD MAN!! i really learned how to draw aged faces this year! ach fraulein, i have not stopped drawing people in their 40's-50's! i would say "send help" but i'm actually having a lot of fun ASKSKS
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i think a funny thing about these art summaries i've done is that they're mostly ace attorney but then there's just a month where i become a different type of ill LMAO this year it was four months for the price of two new interests!
cheers! here's to 2024!!! hope y'all have a fun art year!!!!
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i'm gonna ramble more below about like, other art things i did this year but i'm gonna put it under 'keep reading' bc this baby is getting way too wordy now WHEEZES
1. FAVORITE THINGS I'VE DRAWN THIS YEAR (IN NO PARTICULAR ORDER)
⚖️ mea culpa comic [x]
drawing this one was so time-consuming and ambitious but boy, do i love the end result! i had fun doing the inks for this one but was it a lot! i usually color in lineart and render everything but i had to stop myself from doing it for this one bc man, i'll die asksks
this also has some of my favorite apollos i've drawn, definitely
also! the part about the lineart not being colored and no rendering ended up being a deliberate stylistic choice for this one bc i had like more freedom to do just shadows with inks without it looking too out of place.
💐 my lawfully wedded zine spread [x]
now this one isn't out yet but take my word for when i say that this is one of the most craxy things i've ever drawn for this year, on account of drawing a comic AND group shot all in one!
also literally one of the prettiest things i've rendered this year, lookit that klav...
🎉 aa4 redraw - 2022 anniversary [x]
kind of like my wedding zine piece, group photos are insane, and rendering like uhhh [looks at drawing] 11 CHARACTERS IS ALSO INSANE if i try and draw a group photo again you have to stop me DFGHDJ
🎨 my art fight stuff [x] [x]
was possessed in the month of july or smth bc i pumped out like how many drawings so quickly (before i got burnt out that is pftt)
pace yourselves and don't be like me pls ajshgdghhjk
💥 people park day [x]
my friend told me that it was very obvious i watched across the spiderverse when they saw this FDFGHJD
but yea! this is when i started getting really into like, thought bubbles or just like, panels or drawings within a drawing when coming up with layouts
i still love the colors on this one...
🪩 fem disco portraits
ok so i haven't uploaded these yet but you have to trust me when i say that something was in the water DFGHDJ
who knew that all it took for me to learn how to paint was butches
2. ALSO DID YOU KNOW THAT I SOLD STICKERS THIS YEAR IN OUR UNI'S ART MART?
THE ONLY GOOD THING ABOUT THAT SCHOOL I SWEAR PFTTT this experience has also awaken the merch beast in me and i need to make more physical things for my brain to be happy, that's just how it be pfttt
hopefully next year i can actually start like a shopee shop or whatever lmao
3. ART FIGHT
i'm actually quite happy i got to participate in art fight this year! very delighted for all the art i've gotten and very fun to have drawn for others too!!
4. ZINES
i got invited and joined so many zines from 2022 continuing to 2023 that i kind of got burnt out from participating for now ngl ASKSKSKS not gonna be joining much this year oopsiessss! (unless i lose self-control [very likely])
5. SCHOOL
i don't actually like a lot of the stuff i draw for art school bc i tend to cram and not have fun pftt <- adhd moment, tragic! but here are some that i actually kind of like lol
6. THAT'S IT!
i think that's it! thanks for reading all the way down here!! o(*￣▽￣*)ブ
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"I'd never crave anything else"
@fellshish 's post inspired me so much, loved the phrasing and had to make a little zine. I had a lot of fun with the format and ended up with this!
You can download it if you like (US Letter size, kinda low quality cause I'm still learning). And you can find me on instagram if that's your thing.
Images used come from the Wiki Commons and belong to the public domain.
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