#i know my impression of the ep was always the second but i dont know now i havent rewatched it in forever | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

malevolententity · 8 months

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PROJECT 14!! I TOOK A BREAK FROM PATTERNING RICHAS!!

oh boy!! this took all of quarentena part 1 to make!! its been a few years since i made anything mesh so whipping up this hat in? what 5 and a half hours? maybe 6? i have not checked the vod time and i was also Cooking Dinner during a portion of it so time is hard to judge on how long this actually took. but it was fun! it Did reawaken my urge to crochet a mesh shirt even tho i would never wear it because it would be so uncomfortable. but making mesh is just so very mindless in a way thats good for me. maybe i should make a mesh blanket to scratch that itch.

we have an array of models for this item! to try and show off the mesh say hello to the bobby i made back in? oh the beginning of april i believe? i dont think any of you have actually seen bobby he might have been a twitter exclusive, say hi to bobby. we also have green garlic my bulbasaur showing off the mesh the best i believe!

QUARENTENA SEASON THOUGHTS! YES I AM CALLING IT A SEASON THERES GONNA BE 2 EPS. SEASON 1 ONLY HAD 3 EPS. THIS TOO CAN BE A SEASON!

i am blown away by how fun this group is and the skills they all have to roleplay in a second or third language for like 6 hours with basically no breaks to speak their natural languages. that is taxing to do and to deliver a story on top of that? i am so proud and impressed with all of them. also holy shit????????? no one fucking died???? i was convinced when the oneshot, now season, was announced that it was going to be a dungeon crawl that ends in everyone dying. i cant believe theyre all still alive after that?? AND THEN THERES ANOTHER EPISODE IRL NEXT WEEK?? i cant wait for the tpk next week!

i love this entire cast of characters theyre all such weird fucking guys in the most complimentary ways. I LOVE THAT WE BASICALLY GOT A SAW MOVIE??? THRIVING!! in a move that shall surprise no one. diego is my favorite. look at him. he is guy of all time to me. BUT OKAY THEYRE ALL WEIRD and usually when you have a cast of weirdos theres always someone who doesnt gel but they all did!! they all fought each other!!! but they all still complimented each others insanity and. this is what the party comp is To Me

i am too lazy to open photoshot for this tonight. maybe you get it proper tomorrow<3

i loved the ending. i loved the slow realization on everyones faces that in saving themselves they might be killing the world and still themselves!!!! also i cant wait to see the fall out next week. i am so fucking upset my dnd game is scheduled for around the same time so i am going to miss probably the first 2ish hours but i know my dash and the official!!!! twitter updates account!!! will catch me up on those two hours so i can jump back in. but AAAA oh i loved this. i dont know if it was on purpose that this felt like a zero escape game at times but oh man the production quality in this vs where m at in season 2 is just mind blowing. i knew it got better once they started being in the studio but this was so great for a home game. ALSO YALL GO CHECK ON AMY??? GO GET THE KID??? YOU CANT JUST LEAVE THE TRAUMATIZED BABY ALONE AFTER EVERYTHING U DID TO KEEP HER ALIVE??? GO GET HER?????

AND ALSO?? STUDIO NEXT WEEK?? BRAZIL MEETUP??? OH I AM SO PLEASED TO SEE IT ALL AND WHAT HAPPENS. this is def my longest update for this silly crochet project i started just a few months ago and i apologize but also. i dont because this show does mean so much more to me than i know how to put into words. and its been a long time since i fell in love with a tabletop universe this quickly. and i feel so grateful that i got to be introduced to this ttrpg earlier this year, and got to pull some friends into watching quarentena tonight because theyve heard me gushing about how good this universe is and how i trust this to be satisfying horror which is so hard to do in ttrpgs, but thats another post for another day.

#a ordem crochet #opq #<- mainly because i talk spoilers in this i dont usually fandom tag these posts since i am usually talking about a 3 year old campaign #who anyone who follows me either has seen it. or will not watch a show in ptbr so they dont care if i spoil #fiber art

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grimrester · 3 months

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hi i dont have anywhere to deposit my umineko thoughts now that im a little more than 1/4th of the way through a playthrough so im depositing them here. mostly so i can come back later to see how right or wrong i am. i dont think this post would be interesting for anyone but myself. spoilers below the cut

some notes:

i am much less interested in the concrete individual mysteries and locked rooms than i am in the overall themes and meta-narrative

im watching a youtube playthrough so my ideas may be influenced by the youtubers

i just finished the scene of the second twilight in ep 3

i know/have seen enough of higurashi to know who bern and lamda are analogous to in that story

ive seen a handful of very very vague spoilers including: at some point maria also receives the title "the creator" (i do not know what that entails), rosa and shannon may become beatrices at some point (i saw fanart tagged similarly to evatrice fanart), battler becomes a "sorcerer," kinzo died 2 years ago somehow (???) and at some point there is a character who sentences people (i dont know who) to death in some kind of trial????

anyway here are some collected thoughts on theme assembled in no particular order:

i think the "point" of umineko is going to be that it's a story about storytelling. the "witches" very much all seem, to me, like young girls telling each other fucked up stories. in-text they frequently call each episode "a game" but it plays out much more like collective storytelling, where they all have varying amounts of influence. the magical fights in particular remind me of seeing people god-modding in rps on gaia online when i was 14.

beato is only just getting her footing when it comes to telling a story. she really wants to tell a gory fantasy story but battler refuses to engage with her story that way, and instead goes into it like a classic murder mystery. it frustrates her to have an audience that doesn't seem to perceive her story as "fun" like her fellow fucked up traumagirlie witches do.

virgilia is a more restrained storyteller who thinks more about the emotional aspect of stories, and this is why beato says she's always sucked at "these kinds of games" when they're having their magic fight where the goal is to ridiculously one-up each other.

battler is also a fledgling storyteller, but everyone around him wants to tell fantasy stories and he can't let go of stories more grounded in reality.

im guessing the trial i got spoiled for but haven't gotten to yet is going to put all the witches and maybe battler on trial for their storytelling techniques. the point will be to ask the reader to personally evaluate what value different kinds of stories have. maybe it'll also ask battler to prove concrete culprits for the murders in each episode?

there's also themes here about how empathy is a skill that children have to learn and how trauma can interrupt that learning. this is why most of the witches so far are described/portrayed as cruel but also innocent. they're delighted by gore, dress in ridiculous costumes, and engage in the power fantasy of being witches. it reeks of kids emulating my little pony creepypastas on deviantart because they need some kind of outlet (and, like, same).

all or most of the characters in tea parties represent some real-world person (that we will probably never meet). beato's real world equivalent has friends like her (bern and lamda) or older than her (virgilia and ronove), and likes the real-world battler. she tells stories trying to impress him and that's why she gets frustrated by the way he engages with them. the other tea party characters are essentially her friends dropping by mid-story and contributing to either make it more interesting, or to try and help her by steering her towards a story battler would like more. she's very emotionally stunted due to trauma. i would guess her real-world counterpart's history is similar to the story we hear about Beatrice from rosa. she has an older relative who is, at a minimum, inappropriately interested in her and grooming her.

some some random notes on the mystery solutions:

any magical explanation for the murders are "not true." they are Beatrice's initial explanations for the murders, but battler will eventually go in and work basically as an editor to retcon in real-world explanations. when someone becomes a "witch," this is actually them becoming the culprit (so eva is a culprit in ep 3).

kinzo is burned in every episode to hide that he actually died years ago. his appearance in late ep 2 is due to Beatrice's storytelling - he's not "actually there." the other characters just never found his body.

because kinzo is already dead, and by the red truth we know there are 18 people on the island, the actual 18th person is beato, perhaps? im not super confident in that one.

i feel like i have basically no ideas on the ep 1 murders. i think the faces mustve been smashed for a reason, so the culprit(s) is probably one of the first people murdered, but idk who or why. i think I'd have to go through ep 1 again to come up with anything. same for ep 3 coz i havent finished it.

for the epitaph solution, i think the sweetfish was a hint about following forest trails down to the ocean, then following the oceanline. much like rosa did as a child, this would eventually lead you to the "second mansion" where beatrice lived. this mansion is actually the same as the the first mansion, and they're connected somehow by the underground tunnels. the "two" people in the riddle refer to the two portraits of beatrice and they lead to a passage that connects the two mansions. idk about the middle part of the epitaph about the twilights. honestly i think it might be a red herring added later, as the execution of the twilights doesn't actually seem to revive beatrice (she doesn't really seem to have changed at all throughout the story so far - she sort of always has some level of presence and influence). but i might just think this bc i cant figure out any kind of wordplay puzzle with it.

i think battler gets pretty close to some of the solutions in ep 2. the first twilight is easiest i think. maria is given the key, someone (my guess is rosa) takes the key in the night and commits the murders, reseals the key and puts it back. rosa is shown buying sweets early in ep 2, and in ep 3 she is shown as having sleeping pills for maria. she invites her siblings to the chapel to "discuss" and offers them drugged sweets or other food during the discussion, then murders them after they pass out. (the corpses are frequently described as looking like they're just sleeping.) she does it because she thinks she's the closest to solving the mystery due to her experience as a child with beatrice, and doesn't trust any of her siblings not to steal the gold from her.

i dont think she does the later murders. those are by a different culprit, which is why battler has a hard time solving them - he keeps assuming it's the same person. my guess is whoever commits the later murders does them because they become paranoid after the first twilight. i think it must be one of the servants due to the master key issue but im not sure who, so im stuck from there.

that's all! im excited to find out how wrong i am!

#txt

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heyitsyn · 4 years

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Keeping Up With Seijoh Ep. ∞

a/n: this made me tear up a bit ngl bc haikyuu always hitting us with ‘theres no next year for us’ typa bull like BLS TAKE PITY ON MY SOUL AND STOP TIME AND KEEP MY BOYS TOGETHER :(((((((

it has an infinity symbol bc this is in the future so there isnt really an episode number

for more seijoh content, check this masterlist out!

anon:

the third years coming back to seijoh the following year for a surprise visit, and watching over practice cuz they were in town for break. being impressed on how kyo has calmed down (a bit), kunimi actually giving a sh-, yknow the deal. just the growth of their kouhai makes them 🥺🥺 but THEN- Y O U walk in with the team’s bottles n the small gasp that comes out of your mouth when you see them. they GAWK cuz you’re maturing SO well (stfu oikawa- my eyes up are here) and just 🥺🤲

SO LIKE UNLESS YOURE NEW TO MY BLOG YOU KNOW THIS FINNA BE A SAD ONE BC SEIJOH THIRD YEARS ARE MY FAVORITE BOIS AND THEM GRADUATING MAKES ME :(

oh god here comes the tears

it was something you knew was coming since yanno, third years and all that

but you were so sure you had more time left before it happened

didnt you just join the team and met them like yesterday?

nope love you met nearly a year ago

and they made quite an impact on you in the short term you were together

so during the day of graduation

it wasnt really a school day since it was mostly for third years and the whole ceremony but kouhais could come so they could send off their senpais

you already called each third year the night before, nearly 2 hours per boy, to talk to them and cry with them so you didnt have to cry during the day

but ofc

you were sobbing already when you saw your captain walk up and get his tube with the diploma inside

they tried to remain strong as they sat in their seats but a single glance at you and the team at the stands above, the tears were already either forming or full out slipping

i know yall finna beat me up for this but im not really familiar with the other third years in the team bc theyre not really shown in the anime or manga that much so i dont have a good grip on their character so can we pls pretend theyre not in here?? omg pls dont kill me though

the ceremony felt like a long time for the seniors but when it was finally over, they ran out of that building and yall did too and you bolted yourself into the arms of your captain

oikawa held you tightly against him and he didnt care about being seen by his fangirls, who were waiting outside for him, or the others who wanted to have you to them too

‘i love you, y/n-chan’

he mumbled and you nodded

‘mhm. i love you too, oikawa-san. i love all my boys’

YALL MY HEART IS BREAKING BC OIKAWA ACTUALLY MEANT IT THIS TIME AND YOURE STILL OVER HERE THINKING THAT HES JUST SAYING IT AS A FRIEND LIKE IM-

iwa ripped you away from him and your face was buried into his chest

but it didnt last long since the others got a little impatient and just joined the hug turning it into a group hug

‘i dont want you to leave!’

kindaichi sobbed and kunimi sniffled, holding on tighter to the backs of his senpais

even kyo was sad but hes a tuff boy so he easily hid that behind his usual frown and glare

after seeing their parents and reassuring them they would be home soon, you started your trek towards your usual hang out spot

the second and first years were walking ahead of you while the third years fell back in step with you in between them

mattsuhana flanked your left while iwaoi were at your right

the tears were now gone but sniffles still filled the area and everyone was still down in their spirits

you held tightly to the warm big hands of iwaizumi and the soft touch of mattsun’s hand as if you were clutching your life-line

but you knew no matter how tightly you held on to them, they would still go and eventually leave you behind

the ramen shop was filled with another round of tears as everyone realized that this would be the last time seijoh og would have ramen here

‘WE DONT WANT YOU TO GOOO~~~~!!!!!!’

kindaichi sobbed while kunimi aggressively shoved noodles in his mouth to hide his hiccups

you refused to eat because you were so sad that you were scared you might end up throwing it all up later so you settled on relishing your time with the boys

oikawa was busy talking to yahaba and telling him tips and tricks for next year while iwaizumi was consolling the others who were crying

that left you to harshly wipe off the tears and focus on the jokes that matsuhana were telling to help and lighten up the mood

‘think of it like this! you won’t have oikawa and iwaizumi fighting anymore!’

well,,,,,

that kinda made things worse

geez makki stfu!!!!

you bursted into full tears and you sobbed, loudly and freely

‘WAAAAAHHHH!!!!!’

you wheezed and then continued to cry

everyone flinched and got startled at the sight of you crying

theyve seen you cry before but not this intensely and sadly

‘DONT GO!!! OU-OUR FAMILY’S GONE!! ITS B-BROKEN NOW!!!!’

you wailed

everyone is so used to seijoh antics that they didnt even bat an eyelash when everyone started crying

‘damn it, i was trying not to cry!’

iwa growled and buried his face into his hands to hide the pain in his eyes

‘come here, y/n-chan’

mattsun cooed while sobbing and you went straight into his arms and his arms tightly wounded around you

he pressed kisses on your neck to calm you and he whispered promises to keep you from thinking that you would be alone

the boys were all still crying even when you paid for them and at the exit, everyone wouldnt let go of each other

ngl it was a weird sight of seeing these boys just hanging on and hugging the others and you were tightly pressed against makki’s chest

‘dont cry, y/n-chan. we’ll be here, always. just a 4-hour ride to tokyo’

he promised but you shook your head

‘--too far’

you mumbled and he was able to make out a few words and he laughed

‘i swear you’ll see us in a few hours’

it took a few words of assurance from makki and eventually mattsun and iwa joined

oikawa stayed back because he already wanted to walk you home and iwa knew you were the one that was the hardest for oikawa to tell his plans to

waving them good bye, you fussed and made sure everyone was not crying anymore

‘you text me the moment you get home, all right? and kyo-san, let the food in your stomach settle before-’

‘before i take a bath-yea i know’

he rolled his eyes but he smiled lightly before hugging you

‘go home now, y/n’

he pushed you towards his captain but you pulled away one last time to give each boy a kiss on the cheek

their lips trembled, especially the third years, and wanted to keep their tears in but they rocket launched to space

yanno that one part in season 1 when kiyoko told them to work hard and then they just snot-rocketed and cried

oikawa interlaced your fingers as you both walked towards your house and it was quiet

you were sus bc it was too quiet and oikawa would usually be either skipping, humming a tune, or just yapping his ass off

but right now

he was quiet, slouchy, and,,,, not oikawa

you looked up to see his face and you knew it wasnt just the graduating part

it was like,,,, he was nervous

you squeezed his hand and that got his attention

‘oikawa-san, whats wrong?’

he suddenly stopped and your linked hands caused you to also stop so you watched him stare down at his shoes and you blinked at him in confusion

‘oika-’

‘y/n, tell me to stay’

he,,, sounded like he was begging

pleading

desperate to hear you say it

‘why should i?’

you asked and he finally lifted his eyes to stare into your eyes

he gulped before further explaining himself

‘coach got me a volleyball scholarship’

he whispered and your eyes widened before you launched into him for a hug and pulled back to cup his face

‘oh my god! tooru! a scholarship?! im so proud-’

‘in argentina’

he finished and your eyes dimmed, the lifted corners of your lips falling into a frown

‘o-oh’

you stuttered and pulled your hands away but he grabbed them, placing them back to his face

‘but if you dont want me to go, i wont-’

‘NO! what?! tooru, its your dream! you and iwa-san wouldnt stop talking about that match with argentina and-and you want to go there! dont you dare let that slip away!’

you scolded frantically however oikawa’s face scrunched before he started crying

‘i-i can’t! y/n, i’ll be alone! its so far away! far from iwa, far from you-’

then you reached to your tippy toes and kissed his nose then leaned back with a big smile

‘no matter how far, ill always be right here. im always going to be here, waiting for you’

you mumbled and oikawa hiccuped then leaned his forehead against yours, eyes clashing that was so full of love and fear

‘then dont you worry, y/n-chan. oikawa-senpai will work really hard and he will come back and make you happy’

he whispered and you pulled him even closer to give him the biggest hug

‘im looking forward to it’

TIMESKIPTIMESKIPTIMESKIPTIMESKIP

ONEYEARONEYEARONEYEARONEYEAR

truth to be told with guilty conscience, the third years havent really been in touch

yes theyve called and messaged but there wasnt a normal kind of communication, especially with oikawa

but they decided to go over there during a simultaneous week break for universities in tokyo and iwa, makki, and mattsun pressured oikawa to fly back to japan just for a week to visit

‘iwa-chan im so broke righ-’

‘fine, we’ll see y/n ourselve-’

‘OKAY FINE! HERE! IM BUYING THE TICKET NOW SEE?!’

bahahaha im sorry i love oiks so much its not even funny

they agreed to not tell anyone, even coach, to surprise you all and to see your faces of surprise bc mattsuhana are little shites and they love to mess around

it was a normal day during practice

yahaba was teaching some first years how to serve while watari was giving exercising tips on how to bend their knees without shrieking in athritis

kyotani was doing jump serves while kindaichi and kunimi tried to block him

it was a normal day

the former third years knew the ins and outs of the place and oikawa still had his keys of the gym since he never gave it back so they were easily able to sneak in

they sat on the bleachers and observed everyones growth which really blew them away and took them aback by how much they improved in little time

like kunimis actually huffing and throwing a mini tantrum bc hes so into it and hes mad he didnt get that block right

they also noticed the larger amount of new recruits and based on their practice, it looks like they would be in good hands for the next few years

however, the true shock settled in when this happened

kyotani cursed loudly when the ball hit out but yahaba scolded him for saying a bad word in front of the first years

‘kyotani, dont say that anymore! its not good to teach the babies bad words!’

he ranted and the college boys shared a look of caution and fear, bracing themselves for kyotani’s normal screaming and tantrum for being called out

but they were the most surprised when the bleach-haired boy simply glared at him and turned away to go pick up another ball to hit

‘did,,,, did kyoken-chan-’

‘was he just calm right now?’

‘oh my god iwa-chan kyoken-chan got abducted by aliens!’

I SWEAR TO GOD ITS LIKE THE CURRENT THIRD AND SECOND YEARS GOT AN OIKAWA ‘IWA-CHAN’ SENSOR BECAUSE THE MOMENT HE SAID THAT, THEIR EARS TWITCHED AND THEY JUST KNEW

THEIR SENPAIS WERE HERE

their eyes were wide and their attention snapped towards the bleachers where indeed, their 4 fathers sat

‘OIKAWA-SAN!!!!!!!!!!!!!’

kindaichi screamed and he NYOOMED towards the stairs but kunimi grabbed him by the collar

‘come down here, senpais!’

yahaba urged and coach and naoi shared a look of initial shock but then transformed into happiness

it was nice to see the family together again

they quickly turned into a dog pile with the hugs that were given around like kyotani actually giving iwaizumi a hug and makki and mattsun affectionately ruffling everyone’s hair

the other first years were just staring in awe at the legendary third years of seijoh that theyve heard so much about

‘everyone, these are your seniors!’

yahaba presented and the 3 third years became very flustered but ofc attention whore oikawa soaked it up

‘yes, hello, my little disciples! you are my legacy so work har- IWA-CHAN!’

he was cut into his famous line when his best friend bonked him for being too self-absorbed again

‘waaa, l/n-senpai was right’

some first year mumbled at the scene and their ears perked up at the name

‘l/n?’

‘where is she?! y/n-chan!’

oikawa shouted and looked around

BECAUSE OF FATE

YOU AUTOMATICALLY MANIFESTED THERE

‘YES YOU CALLED’

okay no but you actually walked in just in time, carrying the crate of water bottles, focused on not dropping them so you didnt really see the others

they were silent not because they wanted to mess with you and see how long youd figure out that they were there

they were silent because of how BEAUTIFUL you became

you gained a few inches and your hair is now longer with your baby fat slowly melting away and you were also finally showing your growth with your body

the eyes that used to gleam with childish innocence was now mature and poised like a perfect lady

even the way you walked with a crate made it seem like a ballet performance with the grace at every step and the flowery aura you exuded

you have turned from a ridiculously cute and pretty girl to a beautiful goddess

AND YOU WERE ONLY IN YOUR SECOND YEAR HOW THE HELL ARE THEY SUPPOSED TO HANDLE IT WHEN YOURE FINALLY A THIRD YEAR?!

CAN YOU IMAGINE THE AMOUNT OF BOYS THEY HAVE TO WARD OFF?!

‘my god’

iwaizumi mumbled, flushing red and turning away to hide his fluster

‘beautiful’

oikawa whispered and he gulped, not remembering how strikingly attractive you are

‘have mercy’

makki whined softly, clutching his heart as it started beating fast and made his stomach feel all funny

did they act like this back in the day?

mattsun doesnt have control so he ran forward and you were just putting the crate down when you were lifted off of the floor and twirled around

so like yahaba waved off the others to go back to practice so its like not awkward to be standing around and see this happening

there was only one person who did this to you

‘mattsun-san?!’

you shrieked and you giggled happily as he put you down so you were able to hug him properly and eventually, catching sight on the others behind him

your gasp made them smile widely and you pressed a hand to your mouth to hide the shock and your overjoyed laugh

if they could take a picture of this and remember the amount of love your eyes held and the pure unfiltered happiness that swirled in those orbs

it was like they felt themselves falling in love with you all over again

‘oh my god everyone’s here too!’

you ran to them and jumped at the awaiting arms of iwaizumi and he was still the bara arm babie you remembered

‘i missed you, doll’

he whispered

‘hmmm,,,i missed you more’

he let you go and you skipped over to makki who engulfed you in his arms and you felt his soft brown hair because you remembered he loved it when you ran your fingers through his hair

‘youve grown! so much! you got even more beautiful!’

he exclaimed and you giggled, bashful at his compliment

‘hmm~, no i didnt’

he gave you a deadpan look and you chuckled before scurrying away towards the one you wanted to hug the most

he definitely got more toned and he got taller too

you didnt have any time to react since he grabbed you and squished you against him

‘youre here, oikawa-san’

he nuzzled his head against your neck

‘mhm, im here now, y/n-chan’

he placed a kiss on your nose and you scrunched your face but there was a big smile that was clear

then oikawa’s eyes trailed from your face to your,,, ahem,,, girls

‘jesus, y/n-chan really grew, huh’

he complimented and you blinked confusingly before trailing after his eye’s gaze and it landed on your chest and you punched him

‘urusai, oikawa-san! my eyes are up here! youre so perverted. pervert oikawa-san’

you pouted and moved to seek comfort in the arms of makki

‘hmm, oikawa’s perverted as usual. i think it got worse with all those argentinian women’

makki teased and mattsun joined to poke fun at their captain

oikawa whined and told iwa they were making fun of him to which his own best friend betrayed him and starting teasing him too

you simply watched on and your eyes watered, your sniffles catching their attention

‘eh? why are you crying, y/n-chan?’

oikawa asked while approaching you to wipe your tears with his thumbs

but you shook your head with a teary smile

‘n-nothing-just,,,, i missed you guys. an-and im so happy because its like our f-family’s back together and i just-i-’

you cried but it was out of happiness and their hearts warmed

ofc they felt guilty because they were aware that they werent as in touch as they shouldve been so you probably felt lonely and casted aside without any contact from your boys

but they know now to make sure you feel loved and cared for because as you keep saying, they were your boys

they were a family

seijoh is a family

and you love them

but they love you more

a/n: okay im sorry this is probably trash and all over the place and im crying and stressing but ive been writing in between my college alg homework and its been so hard like WHY IS NUMBERS SO HARD LIKE WHAT-?! but this has kinda been the baby of my break time and relaxing few minutes bc i procrastinate too much and i want to do something i like before i actually go insane and i promise PROMISE that once everything is cleared up i will edit this and im already working on the other requests so expect a few to be out by the end of the week or something like that!!

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whitetrashjj · 3 years

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crying my eyes out at your MLA format essays cuz not every queer storyline in media has to be rooted in angst of coming out. i get some of the points you’re trying to make. i also don’t think the show is queerbaiting but jjpope had just as much “evidence” as jiara had. like please explain why jj was so keen on kiara liking john b just cuz she kissed him on the cheek and then went and kissed pope’s cheek?…. like in jj’s mind a cheek kiss means liking someone and he did that to pope. also there ARE shots of jj’s lingering gaze towards pope lets us not lie here lmao. i get that you’re sick of people calling u homophobic i dont think u are for not shipping jjpope i also dont think the show is queerbaiting at all but you go on about “storytelling povs” and “lack of critical thinking” when YOUR critical thinking is literally biased as hell 😭 u can ship jiara all u want but jj and kiara, ESPECIALLY KIARA, are both very much queer coded and if u gonna say they’re not bc of some cheesy sTorYtELLiNg bullshit that u probably learned from a youtube video then you’re just biased to your ship.

You know why I have to write those 'essays'? Cause I get asks like this that brush over a bunch of different topics and I want to make sure I not only address every part of it but also make sure I'm making my pov very clear so I don't have people misinterpreting what I say - even though they still do - or accuse me about random bitching without and reasons or justification. Anyway get ready to do some crying cause you are getting another essay.

I know not every queer storyline has to be rooted in the angst of coming out. I wish there were more that weren't. It's the reason I loved booksmart so much. It's one of the reasons I love Dare Me, because that show had sapphic leads and while their relationship was at the core of the show. It wasn't the fact that they were queer that was focused on. Oh god I could rant about Dare Me forever.

Now my point with JJ and Pope is that we don't get the impression that the boys are currently out as queer. JJ from the start was set up as a bit of a womaniser, a bit girl mad - it would have been very easy to make that gender neutral if he was bi, as I headcanon. With Pope it's the same, I personally view him as gay, but if he was bi/pan it would have been easy to show him like that as we see him attempting to flirt on two occasions. Now this isn't to say that in future seasons they can switch it up as if it was always canon, like they did with Clarke in the 100. My point however, isn't to say that JJ and Pope releasing their sexualities and feelings has to be filled with angst, the example I gave can very easily be played a bit cutely - even if they do address the internalised homophobia that I'm just sure would effect a character like JJ - but just that based on my experiences as a queer person and what I know to be experiences of others that it would realistically play out differently to how it would with a m/f couple. Even then when to comes to friends to lovers in general the removal of physical intimacy when that tension starts to build out of awkwardness is common, it doesn’t play out the same way that ships like JB and Sarah do in which they increase in physical intimacy.

I didn't bring jiara into this. I didn't go out comparing jjpope and their interactions to jiara, I was simply speaking to how jjpope's relationship was portrayed. In terms of 'evidence' I am more than aware the jiara wasn't written to be a developing romance, anything there was created by what the fans saw and choices made by the editors. But it is also a canon fact that at the very least JJ is attracted to Kie, that all the pogues 'kinda have a thing for her' and that he has 'tried' something with her. Even if the intention of those things wasn't to build to a relationship - they did happen and that's not up for interpretation. I'm not gonna bring up the 'did you tell JJ?' thing cause it still confuses the hell out of me.

The thing with the cheek kisses is that it's not the action in itself that made it a romantic thing. A handshake can build romantic tension when framed that way but that doesn't make every hand shake in that piece of media suddenly romantic, make sense? If you compare the two scenes we have the build up of Kie walking up to John B, a close up of a lingering cheek kiss, the pull back with lingering looks and then the reactions of others who have observed it and picked up on something. It frames it as a significant moment with slow beats. That's how you build romantic tension. With the JJPope one it just flows past it, JJ pulls back from the hug, a quick peck on the check and a 'love you too man' with a smirk and pat on the check. We don't even have a second of Pope's reaction to it. Do you see what I mean?

You can love that moment as a shipper. I mean it's a great moment that really highlights their dynamic. To you it's a dynamic that you see and think oh this would play out so well romanticly, it's a dynamic I see and think oh I love their friendship. Each of those are valid reactions. But it isn't a moment that has been intentionally framed to build romantic tension and suggest a budding relationship.

Darl, I swear to god if I was coming to you with my shipping bias' this would be a very different conversation. I know I will always have them and I will lean into them when I'm on vc with shes, theys and gays and we are getting lost in headcanons but I do my best take a step back when I talk about these things here because I've been in fandoms when you have two extremes and no one relents and it's awful, I don't want to create that space. And once again, I did not bring jiara into this. My original post was not a comparison to jiara.

I am very curious about your perspective on queer coding here. Because yes, JJ has chaotic bi energy and I will die on this hill. But I do not see how he has been queer coded. Other than people seeing a man being physically affectionate with another men and insist that can't be platonic. As with Kie I can see it more, not for a second do I believe that what went on with Kie and Sarah was straight. And I desperately want to see Maddie play Kie as pan to rep her own very underrepresented sexuality! And in terms of how she's written, stuff like being an astrology bitch and environmentalist scream queer to us, I do think it is important to note that the writers of the show being who they are would necessarily have the same impression of what a queer womans traits would be. In regards to that scene in ep 1 where they have the hot touron girl and then JJ, JB and Kie all perking up and doing the nod thing? I don't think anyone has a straight explanation for that.

The 'sTorYtELLiNg bullshit that u probably learned from a youtube video' comment made me laugh cause it reminds me of this guy I had a fight with on the weekend over Remus and Sirius being queer and he decided to undermine my argument by saying 'just because you read it on reddit doesn't make it true' which... yike. Any way, maybe you do but I don't have the tolerance to sit down and watch a youtube video on someone analysing a show. All my interpretations come from years of writing actual essays analysing elements and themes in media. As well as having a keen interest in direction and editing, so I pay a lot of attention to those things and you start to notice patterns. In terms of credentials I don't have any but I do think these 'essays' do an alright job of me not only explaining my interpretation but why. Because I'm not someone to just say things and expect that to just be accepted or think that is makes it true.

#obx #outer banks #JJ and pope #jiara #JJ maybank #kiara carrera #pope heyward #lara answers

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potterology · 4 years

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fave dylb scenes bc I can't get over and I’m already rewatching and noticing little things heheee

- first meeting outside the restaurant. ohh how I love how awkward yet endearing they both were when they finally introduced themselves to one another. rewatching it made me realize that JY was already smitten by SA since the start. (like literally since the start y'all!!! he didn't even know her yet and wanted to stop the car to get SA an umbrella and this was in the first ep!!)

- when JY switched coffee cups with SA bc she spilt her cup and he started drinking it so she can’t refuse even though he doesn’t like coffee. Like he just did it bc he was compelled to do so?? like dude what if she already drank from it??? This scene was so funny to me and I love it cuz I dont think SA is used to being the one taken care of like that so it was just v cute

- when the noona was trying to get them to talk banmal but SA was like oh noooo he’s a superstar. This was cute bc you can actually see that JY was disappointed. Also they keep sneaking peeks at each other lol cute fools

- waiting for taxi scene- this was so freaking adorable. shows how considerate they both are for each other and it’s so freaking awkward when they both realized they were standing there waiting for each other to get a taxi- but like in the cutest way

- when they were both outside that restaurant and SA asked if JY enjoyed his performance at granny’s house and I think this was the first time someone asked our boy if he likes what he does for a living and you can just tell his heart went soft for her(same dude same)

- spontaneous non-date date. ohh I love the first time they ate together at that beer place. they really started to get to know each other there. the mood and how that scene was filmed was just chef’s kiss~~

- rehearsal room we should be friends scene. when homeboy transitioned from moonlight sonata to happy birthday, y'all knew it was over for SA- god damn I would have swoon over too

- by the river “I wanted to see you” scene- high key JY sucks at communicating but I love how he is just so taken by SA that he just flat out says he misses her and as soon as he says it he was almost shocked himself. so pure

- the midnight call. I MEAN. guys. guys. he wanted to just talk to her and ask her out but tried to be nonchalant about it. ahhh they literally portrayed the first stages of dating so well I'm goo for it !!!!!!

- first walk together in the walkway. this was just so adorable. the almost hand holding. the chemistry!! the shy smiles :’’’)

- SA’s birthday when she thanked JY for just being there for her. I love how she quietly acknowledges him and it was such an intimate interaction between them. I replay that scene a lot in my head

- when he ran to SA to give her his signed CD. He was so worried about her he forgot about JK lmaooo. Also the fact the he validated her as a violinist when SA was at a very low point... I mean... boyfriend material ugh

- the scene when SA told JY every little thing he does concerns her and that she didn’t want to feel that way about him anymore. As soon as SA said that homeboy PANICKED!!! I don’t even think he knew how much he liked SA until she said that :’)

- the lunchroom scenes 1) when they were teasing each other and 2) when JY announced that they were dating lolol I love how stoic he normally is but for SA he becomes a softie hehe

-ice cream day date; lol when SA won’t let JY tie her shoelaces bc she didn’t want to fall for him lol ok girl

-night ice cream/ stairs date. y'all know already. shit was just adorable. SA going for the kiss. I melted with the ice cream

- when JY asked SA for her handkerchief!!! it’s such a small gesture but they both knew it had a special meaning and I love how it put SA over the moon. (Also let’s include all the other times we see JY actually use that handkerchief- especially after they broke up. like homeboy was holding on to it for his dear life bc it was the only thing he had of SA~~ my fragile heart!!) ps did we ever see SA get a handkerchief from him???? No??? Sbs give me that pls

- when MS was telling JY in the car that SA has only openly confessed liking two things in her life and one them was JY. He was so flustered and couldn’t hide his smile and dimples... bruhhhhh he was full on swoon. Also when JY heard SA say that she really likes JY like he was so proud of himself lmao he’s like “yeah my gf LIKES ME” lolol

- when the lovebirds fought who was gonna clean up the broken glass at JY apartment. I love loveee this one bc SA has been beaten down so much by everyone calling her talentless that she didn’t even consider how important her hands is to her as a musician. And JY being like honey ur a violist and a musician too- UR HANDS ARE PRECIOUS. This was just v touching. Again showing how JY has always considered SA as an equal despite all the shit people say about his gf. luv him :’)

-all the moments JY just stood by SA’s side and held her hand when she needed comfort. I love how he’s just there for her. His silent support was just enough. (One thing that would have been nice is if we saw SA do the same thing, I felt like the writers were almost there but just didn't go all the way which is a shame tbh)

- Their lil day trip to JY’s hometown. I like how JY was so open to SA here. When he proclaimed that he never felt “this way before” I screamed!! It was at that moment you clearly knew as a viewer that JY never really loved JK. He might have he loved the idea of her, yes. But he never truly loved her the way he loves SA. And his realization of this in that particular episode just made me so so so happy

- Handholding in the bus scene. That shit was so freaking tender bc you can tell how content JY was. He was beyond smitten- homeboy was IN LOVE AT THIS POINT

- when JY dropped SA home. I mean everything about this scene really makes ur heart soft right?? How both of them were beaming? How SA feet probably hurt bc homegirl was wearing heels the whole day and walked another 30 min just so she can spend more time with JY? How she literally ran back to him and JY just had this impression watching her like “my gf is cute af”?? How SA said something along the lines of JY having somewhere to belong to now and you can tell this had a double meaning for him bc at this point he prob considered SA as his home..I was literally mush oh my god.

-break up scene. I know, v painful- but this was a rare one in kdramaland where I actually thought it was necessary for them to split (still wish it was done earlier but alas I'll take it) It was a graceful and needed breakup. Also when JY pulled out that umbrella for her.... bish it was over for me

- SA’s recital. I MEAN HOW IN SYNC COULD THEY BE. I normally skip the musical performances whenever I watch dramas that are music related- but this show makes it so magical I simply could not. PEAAAKKK ROMANCE

- JY’s recital- when he played that last song I was a big mess cuz we all knew it was dedicated for SA :’’) (I listen to this piece all the time now and im so emo when I hear it bc like god WHEN)

- First I love you scene. JY just going for it and chasing his happiness without caring if SA might reject him. We love to see it

-Second I love you scene. YALL. YALLLLL the way JY just releases his breathe when SA said she can't be friends bc she loves him more than a friend will forever slay me. Kim min jae’s acting here was real good. I love how JY said I love you four times and just went for it. top kissing scene in a krdrama for me hehee

- dubokki date. lmao at JY with the spicy level. just plain cute

-the quick side by side peek to JY new album in the last episode. the way it showed how their relationship evolved. how he signed it as “for my love song ah” BISH I WANNA DATE A MUSICIAN TOO NOW

- that lil scene where JY wrote SA’s name as the planner bc he knows she works just as hard as the musicians and deserves the recognition. get u a boy who will vandalize a program notice for u :)

- basically all the scenes at the end of ep 16. I wish all of them were longer. I wanted to see more of them dating and happy!!! But I just love how they are both so INTO each other and you can see how happy JY is bc he finally has that person back that understood him since the beginning and it makes you feel so warm knowing they’re each other’s support system ahhhh I love their love !!

- also just all the scenes that JY looks at SA lovingly ~~ which literally happened since ep 1 I mean they are literally heart eyes emoji for each other every time :’))

- oh oh OH special shout out to ep 11 when JY just can’t stop holding SA’s hands !! the way he does it is so freaking INTIMATE like if I can only describe how I feel whenever I see compilation gifs of that episode where JY just reaches out and holds SA’s hands so steadily and tightly...it’s literally the most heartwarming thing.. idek how to explain what I’m trying to convey but I just vibe with it so much?? it’s so intimate and romantic.. Kim min jae I will die 4 u my love

#do you like Brahms?#do you like brahms #there are more scenes and I will prob go back and add them #I'll shut up soon but I need to talk about it as a form of release lmao #anyways if y'all got dylb thoughts feel free to talk to meeeeee hehehe #also making this list made me realize that Kim min Jae really lives in my head rent free #HIS ABSOLUTE POWER OVER ME #and of course eun bin was just oh so good #I added more #sorry if u reblogged already but I keep remembering more scenes that I love #Audrey

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argumentl · 3 years

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The Freedom of Expression Ep 24 - The more its restored, the less like the original it becomes.

K: This is Dir en grey's Kaoru, starting this episode of The Freedom of Expression. Joe san, Tasai san, welcome....*points to Joe with his bare leg showing*..Errr, are you hot?

J: No, I mean, its hot isn't it?

K: Yeh, it is.

J: How do you feel about Summer? Im really bad with Summer!

K: Well, I don't like the heat, but I don't really go outside all that much.

J: Really? By the way, what are your favourite seasons, Kaoru?

K: Autumn and Spring.

J: Well, yeh right? Which do you hate the most? Winter or Summer?

K: Im really sensitive to hot and cold.

J: Oh really?!

K: But, hmm, which one? Maybe Summer is better.

J: Summer is better? Ehh? But in the winter you can always put on extra clothes if you are cold..but in Summer...we have our limits, right? Summer is...

K: Can't you just put the aircon on?

J: I do...but..

K: If you go outside, right?

J: Outside is also hot, and if you leave the aircon on constantly inside, you'll catch a cold. Its hard, I really don't like summer at all!

T: Haha

J: You're also limited in what you can eat, right? You have no appetite, you get bored of eating soumen noodles every day.

K: Yeh, that does get boring.

J: In winter you can have big hot pots, and all sorts!

K: I eat hot pots in the summer too.

J: Really?!

T: Ehh?

J: Incredible! Ah, but on the other hand, yes, that kinda works.

T: Wouldn't you feel cooler? After eating it?

K: I feel hot.

J: You feel hot? haha.

K: Hahaha

J: Its is hot!

K: I get really hot! Haha

T: Do you eat it with the aircon blasting?

K: Well, even with the aircon blasting, I still sweat a lot.

J: Its hot, right? But doing that feels good? Conversely?

K: What have you been eating?

J: Salad, basically.

K: Did you say you were on a diet?

J: Yeh, my belly is getting round.

K: Weren't you going to the gym?

J: I am going to the gym!

K: Haha.

J: I started with squats, and when I lifted up, it was so hard*1.

K: Hahaha

J: My muscles hurt a lot today. I can't walk up the stairs.

T: Hahaha

K: At 50, you're like...

J: Getting my teeth out...

K: Getting your teeth out..

T: Doing squats...

J: Yeh, well im divorced, and im aiming to remarry, so this is my last spurt. If I havn't reached my goal by age 55...

K: You've entered a plan to reform yourself?

J: Yes, I have.

T: Joe, you're young!

J: If I havn't managed it by 55, I'll give up...*gestures to camera* So, please, everyone.

K: Why are you smiling?

T: Hahaha

J: I've kinda been wanting to do that.

K: Hahaha

J: Lets cut that bit.

K: No, we'll show it

J: Hahaha

K: We won't cut it, haha. Ok, Joe san. Today's news please.

J: Yes, this is today's news. We talked about this news a little bit once on the radio show, didn't we?

K: Yeh, we did.

J: Right? Well this is news about how "The more it was restored, the less like the original it became". So in Spain, its been disovered that an amatuer tried to re-touch a famous work of art, and failed twice. The altered work is a oil painting copy of the 17th century piece by the Spanish Baroque artist Bartolomé Esteban Murillo. The title of the work is, 'The Immaculate Conception of Los Venerables'. The owner of this piece, an art collecter based in Valencia, who paid 1200 euros for it, had requested an employee of a furniture repair company to clean the painting. But during the cleaning, the Virgin Mary's face changed. After not one, but two restoration attempts, the painting was completely ruined, and the owner was apparently very angry. So, if you search for it, you will be able to find the images online. We can't show you them here due to the issue of image rights (*On screen text: Search for Spain painting restoration*). But...yehh..

T: Its incredible, isn't it?

J: This is shocking!

K: They weren't looking at how the picture is supposed to be, were they?

T: *Looking at his paper* Is the top picture the first restoration attempt?

K: Yeh, the one on the left is the original state, and on the right is the first restoration.

J: The top right, yeh.

*Lots of giggling*

J: This has zero sense of Maria! It looks like some vandalism.

K: Its looks like those pictures they stick up outside the police box *2

J: This first attempt is bad enough...

K: Its terrible, really bad!

J: But it generally still fits with the original Maria's line of gaze, right?

K: Yeh, but like, you can see the whites of her eyes. The top half is totally black.

J: If this is restoration work, it means they took money for it?

T: ??? *3

J: Really!

K: How did they actually do it though? Normally you have to use a matching colour to the original, and just do it like this, right?*imitates dabbing paint finely*

J: I think so.

K: But it seems like this person has just gone like "Gahhh' *imitates waving a paintbrush around roughly*

J: They re-painted it, right?

K: They are just slapping paint on, you can't see much detail.

J: Re-writing it! Its terrible!

K: They were somehow trying to remember what it used to look like.

J: At least they could have taken a photo..

K: Without that, this third try is never gonna work.

J: Everyone, please search for these images online. The third image is shocking!

T: The second pic is still looking upwards and kinda has a bit of the orininal feel to it, but the third pic is just staring straight forward!

K: Its the same person who did them both, right?

Kami: Um..I just..

J: Ah, Kami is here.

Kami: Um, I had a look at it, but where did her clothes go?

J: Huh? (*looks at paper*) Ohh, her clothes?

Kami: Yeh.

J: In the original, the area from Maria's chest and up is visible, but by the third picture, the clothes cover up to her head. This is awful!

T: Its scary, isn't it?

J: This is...well, where is the real problem? Even this kind of person has the authority to do restorations, even people at this level.

K: I dont know if they had the authority, they were just asked.

Kami: Yeh, the owner asked a furniture business to do it.

J: Yeh, someone from the furniture business came to restore it.

Kami: If you ask a furniture store to do it, this kind of result can't be helped.

K: For sure. ????*4

Kami: Maria got really ugly.

T: Ahh, I see! Originally, they were supposed to be just cleaning it right? Like, removing the dust.

J: Yeh, that might have been it. Like the painting was deteriorating, and in order to stop it getting worse, or something like that. They must have thought it was ok to go ahead and re-paint it.

K: The person who did it was quite eldery weren't they?

J: Ahh, I see.

T: This is crazy

J: But after seeing their first try, they should have given up trying to fix it for a second time. Somehow, that would've been better.

K: The owner shouldn't ask the same person to fix it, right?

J: Right!

K: But, well, it won't go back to its original state will it?

J: No, it won't.

K: Even if a new person could get to back to this (*points at the first restoration attempt*)

J: ??? Its like hell if you keep going, and hell if you stop. In the end, its like ??? *5, it would be no good...Well, its an impressive thing.

K: Yeh, but imagine if you wanted to keep viewing the painting, as for the first restoration, if you look at it from far away, it kiiinda still resembles the original a bit. But the second one is no good at all.

J: Yeh, its no good. In the first one you can kinda still see that they were trying to paint the virgin mary, but in the second restoration, it looks like an old woman..not even a proper portrait.

T: Her nose is well defined though, haha.

J: Well, yeh...Isn't the Virgin Mary a friend of Kami's?

Kami: Well, the one in the original is my friend. The third one is totally different.

J: Its no good?

K: That kind of old woman, really.

J: Do you consider this to be a profanity? Is this ok?

Kami: Well, its ok, isn't it?

J: Hahaha.

Kami: That kind of thing.

J: Ah, its ok.

Kami: The original is really well painted isn't it?

T: Mm, yeh.

Kami: Yeh, I think its a really good picture.

K: Its a copy though right? There is someone who painted this as a copy?

T: Yeh, there is a proper original.

K: It would be pretty expensive to hire that person to fix it, right?

J: I think they were trying to save money. 140000yen was too much for them. I wonder how much it usually costs to have a painting decently restored? How much did they save?

K: It probably takes quite a long time to do.

T: I think it takes a really long time.

J: Yeah. Well, when they saw how it ended up, it says the owner was angry, well, yeh, he would be angry wouldn't he?

K: Yeh, he would. Cause its his precious painting that he just wanted cleaning.

J: Yes, thats it.

K: I can only laugh at this, haha. Its a total disaster, really.

T: It really is.

J: Well, the lesson to learn from this is that a ricecake maker makes ricecakes. If you want anything repairing properly, hire a professional..otherwise this type of thing will happen.

T: Thats it.

J: Don't be stingy!

T: Its problematic if they pretend to be a pro, then take your money. But in this case they were just a furniture store.

J: Asking a furniture store to do it was the mistake. Why did they ask a furniture store?

T: But they still said, 'Yes, we can do it', right?

J: Hmm, yeah.

K: They had the look of someone who could do it. The owner was fooled.

J: Its like 'The Guild', they may have had the look of a craftsperson. You have to be careful with appearance too.

K: Well, I think we'll finish here. Please subscribe. Thank you very much.

J: Go Hanshin Tigers!

*1, 2 Couldn't make out the last words, but i think its something like this.

*3, 4, 5 Couldn't make out.

#dir en grey #the freedom of expression #tfoe #薫 #kaoru

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bonesofapoet · 4 years

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Blood of the Holy

[matt murdock x you]

author’s note: hey hi hello, if some of you recognize this format + writing style but not the blog, i used to share my work on my main @ladyofstardvst and caved on making a writing blog. yall dont need to sift through my non-writing shit just to find my work. i’ve never written for this nerd before but here we are with a study of a sort! be kind! i take requests now! tw for blood, implied violence, swearing

word count: 1894

ao3: here

Most people couldn’t stand the neon in the dark.

It was garishly bright, it was harsh, it was annoying at best. The sign would blink and linger behind your eyelids, stain the shadows in the dark like sunspots, make an impression that washed out the relaxing calm, the blanket of the night.

It keeps most people awake, Matt Murdock explained on that very first night. It doesn’t bother me, obviously. Take the bed. It’s not as noticeable in the bedroom.

But it didn’t bother you either. The contrast caught your eye on the second night; the colors would paint the monochromatic neutral tones of the apartment, how they would mix and melt into the chipped brick walls, the trim, the beams of the ceiling. How if you were in the right place – the right cushion on the couch, far enough back into the kitchen – it looked like a painting come alive right before your eyes. Something that would go on to live in a local indie gallery, something inspired by vaporwave, or whatever they were calling neon nostalgia these days.

Still. Silent. Chiaroscuro. Art in the wild.

It was like clockwork, the blinking. The colors coming and going at the first peek of evening shadow, only to blink right off at the first knock of the sun’s rays on the horizon.

After the third, fourth, tenth, twentieth nights it had become a comfort of sorts, namely for the days Matt Murdock wasn’t there to press you into the wall and kiss you senseless, or weave each other stories under the moonlight with a nest of blankets and concrete beneath you. When he wasn’t there to ghost his fingertips over your skin as you drifted off to sleep, so painfully content that you always wondered if this beautiful man with a devastating secret would be the end of you.

You never knew, but he often asked himself the same thing.

Then there were days that damned neon was the only constant about Matt Murdock, the Devil of Hell’s Kitchen. Daredevil.

Moments of lovesick peace would only last so long.

Your skin would crawl on the nights sleep wouldn’t come. Mug of tea, coffee, something stronger cradled in your hands while your mind wandered, your feet wandered, your eyes drifted around this space of his, this little hideaway of yours. You would always hear him before you saw him, adrenaline spiked and oh so weary. Some nights he was covered in so much blood you didn’t know where it ended and his own crimson suit began.

“You’re still awake,” he would say, scowl tugging his mouth down, always sounding surprised. As if it was unusual, for you to be restless on the nights he donned devil horns to go hunting.

And you’re still alive, would be your reply.

He would stay close until dawn. You would gravitate toward him just the same, moths to flame, flowers to the sun. Conversations were hazy and hushed in the early morning-late night blur. They walked that fine fragile line between this is not okay, Matt, and you know you can’t shove me away as easily as everyone else, you stubborn ass.

Unspoken vs spoken. Horror vs love.

Clockwork, nonetheless.

Until one day, the clock shattered.

Matt Murdock doesn’t come home.

Then it’s days. Weeks slipped into months. Months slipped into a blend of minutes, moments, denial casually catching hold within as you found yourself still in his apartment – your little hideaway - watching the steady blink blink blink of the neon sign through the dirty, frosted window panes of the kitchen. Then the living room, then the kitchen counter. Cold tea, day old bitter coffee, something stronger untouched and unloved in the mug that hung loosely in your hands.

Those feelings of heartache and unease and an angry I fucking told you so lingered at the back of your mind, the tip of your tongue. The last time you saw him had been reenacted so many times, it began to feel like a dream. A nightmare. The flesh made into ghosts. Phantom lips brushed yours in such a gentle, such an urgent way that your pulse began to spike at the memory. The loss. The longing.

You thought about how you had gotten here, of all places, here – this apartment, this man’s life, both of you entwined with secrets and lies that could end both of you forever-

Everything was safer in the dark. What Matt Murdock hadn’t known – well. That wasn’t how he had met his end, after all.

It was almost too much to think about, on some occasions.

Until one day, when the clock began to tick once more.

You heard him before you saw him, the familiar cadence of his footsteps descended from above. The quiet slide of the roof access door snicked open and closed in the unholy hours of the night, the unholy hours of the morning.

The silence was new, however, and your eyes drifted up to see a shadow at the top of the staircase, frozen and tense and so very familiar.

“You’re still awake,” he said, and the tears were suddenly there; the ones that could never come, the ones that never seemed to leave. They were present, and the noise that left your throat wasn’t coherent, wasn’t normal, but a strangled laugh escaped your lips anyway.

“You’re still alive,” you replied. If not for the routine, your answer wouldn’t have been so intelligible. “You’re alive.” came the raspy whisper.

His silhouette nodded, began to limp down the stairs into the apartment proper. Began to finish his long journey back to you, back to everything, really. The mug in your hands was no more – placed safely, if not hastily – on the table, and you met him halfway.

“Yeah,” he said, voice quiet and so very hesitant as he clawed off the scarf covering his eyes. “I’m alive.”

There’s the hint of a smile that catches in the neon blink, one that you dreamt of sometimes, on the long nights. Shared breaths, lovesick grins, stray tears being gently brushed away followed in a fog, in a rush, in slow motion that threatened to dismantle so many things about his time away.

And then -

“Where the fuck have you been?”

He’s holding your waist, fingertips splayed, grip firm if only to convince himself that finally – finally, he’s here, you’re here, you're together. Your own hands slid to his shoulders, but you stepped back to keep him a few inches away.

Your gaze was hot and strong and analytical – Matt could feel your eyes as they saw bruised skin, torn clothes, battered, bloody knuckles. He’s been in worse shape, both you and he knew that, but he also knew he was no drawing, no painting, nothing close to a work of art worthy of a museum either. There were bloody, violent masterpieces under guard at the Louvre more worthy than he.

Had he asked you, you would have disagreed.

He can’t see the sorrow drowning the color of your eyes or the way softness carved a home on your expression, carefully melting away the tension, the anger, the fear. He can’t see you, but he does and even after all this time he still knew how to read the air around your mood shifts and the lilt of your voice. Still knew that after all he’s put you through – he felt a weight lift off his shoulders, Atlas freed at last.

He may have lost touch with many things, many people, but not once had he ever lost you.

“I’m sorry,” he began, emotion becoming thicker in his voice with every breath, every word that tumbled past his lips. It had always unsettled him, how you could unearth what he tried to hide, tried to bury.

Moths to flame, flowers to the sun.

He condensed the happenings since the building collapse after his stint with the Defenders, his words spilling out quick and quiet, rushed and worried.

But if he hadn’t finished what he started, what was he doing here? What was he doing with you? Why now?

“Let me – let me get this straight. Were you going to let us think you died, until – when? You got your shit together? Killed Fisk?” his fingers tightened where they held you, unseeing eyes wandered anywhere and everywhere except right in front of him, right on you. You knew that look. Your voice softened. “Or were you just going to disappear? Like this meant nothing – like this means nothing? And as grateful as I am that you are – why are you here, Matt?”

He shook his head, ignored the cracks that broke open his heart like dropped glass. Your name spilled from his lips like a holy hymn that golden haloed angels could never hope to sing. No one could recreate the most divine sound in all of creation. Matt Murdock would always swear you were a goddess incarnate, no matter how sinfully blasphemous it was. “You mean everything.” he pulled you into him, moved so his face was close to yours.

“It’s not that simple,” he said after, and you deflated in an instant. The amount of times a variation of this conversation had been voiced between you – you would never know. It was like a renegade wildfire: possible to lessen, impossible to tame.

It was as quick as the changing of the seasons, how he took on the urgency you’ve only witnessed a handful of times - when he allowed you in the presence of Daredevil himself. You remembered what he asked of you lifetimes ago, between hushed words and bloody gauze, hands slick with red and a needle poised between your fingertips. How if danger ever came to your door, you would listen and you would trust, and you would let him do whatever it took to keep you safe.

To keep you both safe, you tried to correct. He would nod, and you would ignore that he never agreed to such a thing.

“We need to go,” was all he said, but you knew. You remembered.

The strongest jolt of fear slammed into you, bleeding a black and white, us and them mentality. It threatened to smother the blinking neon, the bright washes of blue and white felt muted, felt so very distant when you realized that someone was coming here, someone figured it out, figured it all out.

Oh.

That wasn’t the answer you hoped for.

Us vs them.

“So it’s finally happening.”

Matt’s hands fell away from you, one slid to twine your hands together and squeezed. He was solid, he was grounding. You looked into his eyes. “You know I won’t let anything happen to you,” he took his free hand, lifted it to brush your cheek with tattered knuckles, bruises blossomed like night blooming flowers. He left a trail of soft burning flames when he traced a path down to your jaw where he stopped and cupped your face ever so gently. “That’s the one promise I knew I’d never break.”

Fear melted away when you closed the distance to kiss him, felt that heavy soul twine with yours; all was suddenly right with the world for the first time in a long time, even if the anguish of this city was about to come crashing down on your shoulders all over again. It tore at your heart, this kiss, because it was so very reminiscent of the first time he ever kissed you. Bright eyes, flushed faces, the thrill of something new ignited all around you. The future painted with vivid neon instead of muted pastels. It felt bittersweet, and you knew down in the marrow of your bones that this could very well be the last thing you would ever share with Matt Murdock, the Devil of Hell’s Kitchen. Daredevil.

“I know,” you whispered against his lips. “I trust you.”

Once those words were in the open, there was no going back.

Your secret could wait.

#matt murdock x reader #matt murdock x you #matt murdock imagine #daredevil imagine #matt murdock oneshot #daredevil oneshot #matt murdock #daredevil #charlie cox #kas writes #marvel imagine #marvel one shot

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elecman108 · 3 years

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Man, I forgot to post 90% of my art here for the past while. I’m gonna do an art dump in this post under the cut. Enjoy the bonk emoji if you don’t click the read more, and man am I dumb and forgetful lmao.

Includes: OCs getting names, a Sonic impression, a D&D map, homosexual energies, a sheep floating in the astral sea, a birthday drawing I already posted, Hex Maniac Ender, D&D Characters, D&D Characters as Miis in Miitopia, Little Hater Axel, local Demon in the consciousness of my D&D character yelling at him, illegal plants, a necromancer being cute, an actual event that happened in a D&D game two days ago, and Mermay drawing.

That’s everything in here as a TL;DR, I guess. Enjoy your day!

I’m gonna try and sort of have them in chronological order, oldest first, but I may end up putting them in the wrong order. If I do... Whoops, I guess?

[04/14/21] - This isn’t really new art, but I started to work on giving the four OCs of mine without a full name full names... I have not finished this bit, though. So Hunter and Akira have full names, and Warlock and Assassin only have temporary names. This may end up like Seven where I put in their names as a temporary name (7th OC I’d made at that time) and it just kind of... sticks. Lmao.

[04/20/21] - Alone on a Friday Night? God, you’re pathetic. I didn’t colour this one because it was a half-attempt at a meme image I still like it, though, so I might end up colouring it. It’s gonna appear again whenever I do my “unfinished drawings art dump” at some point probably in... June? I know I said I’d post them last month but forget it, lmao, it’ll happen eventually.

[04/20/21] - A D&D Map! This was to help me visualize the layout of my D&D character’s ship he used to be on. Also for my DM if they ever put us aboard the ship. The little fella in the corner is just there to vibe. This map is made of free to use assets from This Website, so while I’m gonna say DONT USE MY MAP WITHOUT PERMISSION, feel free to make your own!

[04/26/21] - Lesbian Day of Visibility drawing of yours truly, the disapointment! That’s... really all I have to say about this, honestly. It was just for that one day and that was it, lmao. I mean, I accidentally lined it in dark pink, so.. .That’s different, I guess?

[04/30/21] - Do Astral Seas dream of Ensorcled Sheep? Does the City know what Sheepleb is going to do? What crimes he may commit? Who knows! This was fan art of Critical Role ep. 134 if I remember correctly, right at the end when they jumped into the portal into the astral sea and Caleb was a sheep. Using my knowledge of the German language, I knew the word for “shit”, and had to use it.

[05/07/21] - This was already posted, but it’s going in here to dilinuate that it was drawn at this point. Also, aside from playing Miitopia, this is all I have to show for myself until the 12th.

[05/12/21] - Hex Maniac Ender challenges you to a Pokemon Battle! WIll you win against my team? My sis, who loves fairy types, pointed out to me that there’s a fairy girl and hex maniac duo, so I’d be the hex maniac. I spent... Over a week drawing this, because I basically had to redraw the Hex Maniac art from scratch in a higher quality size, and then draw myself over it. So... You can excuse the low-effort background for once. It was basically this, and then my birthday doodle from May 1st to May 12th, and then I took a break to draw up several D&D characters quickly for fullbody references.

[05/12/21] - Remember this art I made several months ago? I finally added my other two completed characters! I have three more named but without character sheet D&D characters, so for now this is just Kara, Axel, Golden Shadow, Kau, Cecillia, and Miri. Kress, Tempest, and Melia will have to wait until I make character sheets for them to be posted, and... For when I probably make more D&D characters. I have at least 9 additional, incomplete character ideas floating around, so... I’m never gonna be done this art, huh?

[05/12/21] - Speaking of D&D characters, did you know I’ve been making them as Miis in Miitopia? So here is their finished full body art next to their Miitopia self! Some of them look a little off (Golden Shadow, Cecillia) because of limitations of the editor and shading issues, some of them look a little off (Kau, Kress) because this is a human face canvas that I’m using to make a non-human face, and some of them (Melia, Axel) look REALLY GOOD. Common traits among my D&D characters include green eyes and tall. You wanna know why? Because I am tall and... despite having red eyes, I do have green eyes under the coloured contacts.

[05/15/21] - More D&D stuff! This is based around my D&D group’s current Rime of the Frostmaiden campaign where our Goliath Fighter, Nioh, ends up getting a little bit of hate for being cocky, and our little (well over 6′) hater, Axel, is just a man full of irritation. These are the tallest two characters of the group at the moment. Someone send help. Nioh belongs to one of the other D&D players, Axel (and his stupid additude) belongs to me.

[05/15/21] - This is what me playing D&D feels like. Me, the demon entity trapped inside the head of my D&D character, yelling at them to do things while the dice decide that they’re gonna get bopped a hundred times by a yeti and somehow still survive. This is also a reference to our first or second game where I just ran off like sixty feet to one side of the battle map to fight a Crag Cat and was just in Gay Baby Jail until like two turns later when I could run back to the others. I also drew him not in his winter gear even though this is a bit from when we were atop Kelvin’s Carin in an icy cave, so maybe that’s why he’s at low HP.

[05/15/21] - Melia has good gardening tips, such as Use A Mars Mii Trap To Hide A Body Because They Are Endangered And It Is Illegal To Dig Them Up. I love her a lot, because she’s the youngest of four, all four sisters based around the different seasons. She’s based around Autumn, so she’s all orange and yellow and brown and is so cute. Also she’s Chaotic Neutral, as if she didn’t need to be mildly more threatening.

[05/15/21] - Cecillia is my Tiefling gal who lived in a very northern town plagued by cold weather and snow, and Axel is my Pirate guy who spent most of his time further south on the high seas and warmer weather. So, naturally... I’ll use the guy more acclimatized to the hotter weather in the campaign where we spend 99% of it in the snow. She uses Tarot Cards as her spell focus, and I decided to sneak my other D&D characters onto her Tarot cards so naturally, Axel is The Hanged Man, given his backstory and personality. She’s a very cheerful and friendly Tiefling Necromancer of the Hexblade, so she’d for sure take care of those around her to ensure their success. Especially if they’re on her Tarot Cards, and their spirit comes to her aid when she asks for them.

[05/16/21] - Content Warning; Ryma thinks too much into local stupid moron’s lack of knowing how to answer a question and thinks too much into the reputation of Pirates. Poor Axel, man doesn’t know how to socialize with people who aren’t pirates and is used to being hostile towards everyone, so when he’s asked a question that his answer to is “uhh... no?”, he panics and ends up making a mistake that leads him to think that Ryma can read his mind. Ryma belongs to another of the D&D players. I guess me drawing all those spicy Cow Costumed OCs earlier just brought me to drawing Axel being a bottom in this, huh?

[05/16/21] - It’s Mermay, which means more OC drawings! Here’s Theo after drinking some potion that turned him into a mermaid, and Seven, tiredly, collecting his stupid boyfriend so that Lailah can fix the fact he’s turned into a mermaid. Mer!Theo is based around his sword’s colours of indigo-purple with red accents, which looks a little weird since Theo is the Blue one of the group, but... it looks cool, I guess. Seven’s just the same outfit as always, just no gloves this time.

And that’s it for the art dump! This was, frankly, MASSIVE. I’ll try and remember to upload both on Twitter and Tumblr at the same time, but... Ah... I have been drawing a fair bit. Just mostly sketches and linework that I haven’t finished and may not actually finish. If they’re not completed, I’ll dump them all into something at the end of the month or whatever. Maybe you’ll get the old sketch of the Axel face in panel 3 because in the sketch phase it was an Ahegao face, in the clean sketch it was a lip bite, and in the linework and final it’s just horny face. lmao.

Top ten things I have to remember for drawing: AXEL HAS A SCAR AND GREEN EYES. I remember his eye colour now, but if you look at his fullbody ref, he’s got brown eyes. And, naturally, I keep forgetting to put in his scar. He has more, but most of them are located in areas covered by his clothes. So if I ever draw him shirtless I guess I’ll have to place them somewhere.

Also maybe finish the reference sheets I have left to finish so I can post more of them, since I have two “Pets” completed (Roko and Mona’s nameless pet), but I have to do up Hunter, Warlock, Assassin, Akira, Myuut, and Stella. I’m betting when I do complete two more, it’ll be Hunter and Akira. Those two are the most fun to draw, at least.

#the disappointment speaks #drawings by me #OCs #D&D #art dump #Miitopia #of all of these drawings I gotta say the most cursed is censored bottom!Axel and the most blessed is Cecillia's lap nap #I drew a lot of D&D stuff lately! Most of my OC stuff has stayed in the sketch stage so #I guess that says something about what I've been prioritizing in my drawings?#Also that drawing a twunk as a twink is incredibly funny and cursed. love my pirate boy

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david-watts · 3 years

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do you really notice a difference between wright/young songs compared to vanda/young?? like i always thought wright/young had some amazing song but someone said ‘nah, none of these songs are hits’ were they were ALL top 10 in australia!! I JUST DONT GET IT!!

there is a difference between wright/young and vanda/young!

first thing I have to note is that with wright/young george would be more of the melody/instrument side of the composition while stevie would apparently sit on the toilet for hours writing the lyrics. like 'the old oak tree' was written looking out at the vandersluys' backyard (vandersluys being dick diamonde's family surname) and literally the only instance I can think of where it is not mentioned that being the location of where a song's lyrics being written is when johnny young went around to their hotel room in perth at seven in the goddamn morning to a scene where absolutely none of the group had been to bed yet and there were allegedly naked women there too. so stevie wright went and threw up in the bathroom because they were all hungover, did I mention that? anyway he came back out and in like ten minutes they banged out a song for johnny to use. also I should not johnny young is NOT a relation and also got his comeuppance in the form of a young molly meldrum with a tape recorder.

anyway when the group went over to the uk in july 1966 harry and george were writing together I think, but when they were writing some stuff and showed shel talmy the beginnings of 'friday on my mind' talmy apparently went 'work on that one' and after that became a hit and talmy encouraged vanda/young compositions more wright/young fell by the wayside. anyway because harry was learning english as he went which can I just say is super impressive that he managed to do that on the go. I have respect for anyone able to do that. but because english is his second language I reckon that george would've helped out more with the lyrics than would've happened with wright/young compositions. so there would be a difference simply because there was a shift in who was writing what but it's not too much of a difference.

also the easybeats' 'failure' in the uk could've been avoided. if the label had released 'sorry' first instead of the more recent 'come and see her' it would've been noticed more. but instead the first uk release around the time of the easybeats' arrival in the uk was 'come and see her' which... I'm sorry it's an ok song I like dick's singing in it even if he did it under protest but 'sorry' is so much better. I don't even know if it was released in the uk before the 'friday on my mind' ep which is a damn SHAME.

another reason for the easybeats' 'failure' (I say failure like they didn't do ok in the charts often times) is because of the experimentation that went on in the studio. which is kinda a lame excuse because there are plenty of bands that experimented and were really successful because of it but probably because of that lack of foundation with uk releases and the fact that they were in the uk which was a different environment to australia like flower power didn't hit australia really until 1969, it didn't stick with the original audiences who were also finding different bands and moving away from the easybeats. yeah. also what is it with people thinking the australian no. 1 hits don't count like??? especially in the era before and around the advent of jet airliners like it took eighteen months for things in the uk to get here in a meaningful way. six months more if you were in tasmania up until like. the nineties at least. it makes no sense that a region like australia/the pacific that's more isolated than the rest of the world gets written off like that. like. the easybeats knocked the beatles off the charts in 1965 if that's not impressive or important or makes a song a hit then you're simply WRONG

#thank you for asking!!!#do appreciate being allowed to talk about the easybeats. even if I have to talk about where stevie wrote.#he literally joked about pissing off dick's siblings like WHAT #his parents are pissed off because 'it's the devil's music' and you DO THAT FHDKFD #also were you aware stevie was lefthanded. king #I guess what I'm trying to say is there's a definite shift in the writing but it's not by much #and if you weren't aware of the switchup in writers you'd think it's the natural experimentation #and improvement all creatives go through as they hone their skills #y'know???

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yyxgin · 3 years

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dunnae worrae bestie ❣️ life gets in the way sometimes (and responsibilities)

okay so i just liked the kind of air to love alarm? idk it just made me feel like i was somewhere else bc i felt the production quality was that high. some of it was questionable i do agree w that but also song kang is total heart-eyes 😍 and meteor garden was sweet for like a minute each episode and the rest was me groaning in agony just wishing dong shancai would snipe daoming si’s mother. shancai did so much too?? like four episodes in she won a cooking competition against a girl who had literally been professionally training to impress one of the boys ✋ but shancai literally came from almost nothing. also — i’ve never been more frustrated w a drama than meteor garden like sis was literally dirt poor, came close to being evicted twice and her parents moved back to their fisherman hometown leaving her in shanghai (i think?) to make money bc they couldn’t afford the city but she had the newest phone 🛑✋

very early on in my kpop days i had no idea who to bias or however that worked and i was like ‘well i like stray kids i’ll just buy an album’ anyway one of the pc’s i pulled was a polaroid type thing for changbin and i said to my friend wow that’s such a boyfriend picture and that’s the story of how i ulted changbin. im so blasé about so much it’s worrying sometimes 🙀🙄✌️✌️ im not too bad about watching things. i used to struggle a lot but bc i’ve trained myself to read fast enough to see the subs and then flicker to the scene on screen so i don’t get bored. i do feel sometimes as if i am following when i’m looking at my phone but realistically i shouldn’t be this bold 😬

noice!! i’m still new to adulting but i’m p sure ive been at it for longer than i think. when i was fifteen and working in a hotel i was asked if when i was finished for the summer i was going back to uni 🤡 all i keep thinking about is finally having a job again and being able to spend an entire pay check on albums ngl i haven’t impulsively bought anything recently and i’m itching to be irresponsible w my money again 🤠 i know some girls who have preordered all the versions of dream and MAN am i tempted 😭😭😭 this is getting so out of hand at this point i’m going to have to strap myself to my bed until june this is not it ☹️

i have read for nct members certain members are more popular in like eastern us? i imagine it’s to encourage trading or to buy more albums so i could only guess that’s what’s happened to me w mamamoo 😭 theyre thé only gg i am properly into. i didn’t want to be thirsting over boys all the time bc... idk i just wanted some variation so mamamoo it was! twice is too many people for now (don’t even say but nct has 23, ik ik but i was only on my second group and i refused to acknowledge more than one unit for like 7 months bc i was scared) and blackpink has like 2 songs 🤡🤡 i added this bot called zephyr to my discord server and me and my friend roll for collectible kpop cards (it’s p neat and i’ve found groups i wouldn’t have been able to find myself otherwise) and she’s helped me discover so many groups! i think i was enjoying a fromis_9 song earlier <3

i’m always having good days these days 🥺 so i hope yours was good too!! also i don’t expect you to reply to these straight away (bc they’re unnecessarily long) i just try my best to reply straight away otherwise i’ll forget i even sent sumn in the first place! ~🌻

the production quality was definitely very high with love alarm, it looked so nice and aesthetic :(( but like,,the storyline ?? when they kissed in the first ep?? i- that was it for me. i couldnt watch it any longer. my best friend finished it tho and i think she liked it,,so like-- fair.

PLEAAASE METEOR GARDEN SOUNDS SO MESSY i lowkey wanna watch it just for the shits and giggles now,,i can’t,,, like the cooking competition? that sounds like a fucking disney channel plot to a movie. i am all here for it tho

YOU HAVE A CHANGBIN POLAROID OKAY BESTIE I AM ON MY WAY TO ROB YOU NOW. DROP YOUR ADDRESS,,,DEADASS. AAAAH also i am bad at watching things to the point when i forget to turn on the subtitles sometimes and then get surprised when i dont understand a shit anD THATS when i realise somethings wrong.

i am so new to adulting pls,, this is my first part time job and i also didn’t have a bank account until literally today. i am a babie,, i couldn’t even do things by myself like i can’t fucking order for myself in the restaurant because i am socially anxious hihi. bUT i figured working with people might help me get rid of that and i am also fullfiling my childhood dream of working behind the cash register now, so that’s cool. the only thing i need now is to graduate, go to uni and do my driver’s licence and then i’ll be adulting for real imo

i am really good with money surprisingly?? i dont spend much, because i dont have money lmao and when i do i keep it because i just like the thought of having money and not the actual spending. YOUR FRIEND BOUGHT ALL THE VERSIONS OF THE DREAM ALBUM??? LOWKEY ME FDKAJ no but fr i think i’m just gonna order the boring version once i start working because it fits my aesthetic the most and i love the concept photos. also if i pull that one specific renjun photocard i might just cry my eyes out but i’ll be happy with anyone bc i literally ult the entirity of dream at this point.

ooh i dont really enjoy the sound of girlgroups i think ?? i need some noise if you know what i mean :( im not into like chill songs that much. bUT uhh i like itzy and i am gay for them pls. i also havent listened to their comeback yet so i am a fake fan i guess but i’ll fix that soon i prOMISE

i am doing well and i am also glad you are doing well !! <3 your asks make me so happy dfjka i finally dont feel as invisible on this stupid site lmao. also thanks for understanding that i dont reply that quick, but i tend to just uhh leave things be for a while ?? like i get a message and i dont always reply straight away for some reason. but yea. thank you !! <3

#💌ask #🌻 anon

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1-800-get-sherlocked · 3 years

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For the ask game: Has fandom ever made you enjoy a pairing you previously hated?

henlo piaya!

hmm okay idt i ever hated any pairing a lot unless it was well very inappropriate...like inc*st or smth; i was usually like ok yall can vibe and do ur own thing haha

but i did have a ship i did not have a positive impression of before i got into it:

ok warning i ramble a lot and i SUCK at using periods so its just one long run on sentence i apologize in advance xD (and i use “like” way too much):

(the second and third paragraphs can be skipped ish if needed haha)

before i watched sherlock i initially thought to myself that i like, probably wouldnt end up shipping johnlock (lies...i always end up shipping), and like i knew there was kind of drama about it a long time ago but i wasnt in fandom then so i didnt know and i was scared i’d be like, judged for being a johnlock shipper or whatever so when i went into it i did not have a good view of the ship (i didnt hate it, i just doubted it) (i initially had to watch eps 1 and 2 for brit lit class in school so well that kind of ruined the effect but i ended up rewatching both and then watching everything else)

but then i was like ok sike nvm its like definitely gay (<- pls imagine this in john watson’s voice for maximum effect) and i was like goddamn the chemistry DAMNNNN (i would do an analogy of two elements that r really good together but frankly ive forgotten most of my chem knowledge and all i can remember is hcl and nacl and neither of those sound like a good analogy) and like just the moments john and sherlock have and like idk the tension between them and especially just the way they just complement each other so WELL?? how?? martin freeman and benedict cumberbatch r really good actors ahdafsl and like how they’d do anything to save the other and the LONGING and just bjaldsuujksdf and they just ugh just THEYRE SO GOOD TOGETHER and i just had that moment of realization at some point maybe after i finished s1 - that pool scene, and i was like....OH. and then i was like WHAT DO U MEAN JOHN GETS MARRIED and THEN SHERLOCK LEFT THE GODDAMN WEDDING EARLY and OMLL ok also the ajsdfll whats it called i forget but the uhhh the trolley scene?? ive rewatched that scene an unhealthy number of times also so much stuff in the abominable bride and o also irene adler that was really interesting as well (<- both of these i understood a lot better after absorbing fandom content) and i was like wow...johnlock is real but so is the queerbaiting...big sad...

(listen after i finished binging s4 (which i finished at like 4 am one day) i was like WHAT WHAT WHAT i was utterly confused (i had to read some fluff before i could go to sleep that day lmao)) and i was still hesitant to ship even after all that cause i thought the fandom was dead (im what like idk 3, 5, 6 years late?? idk) so i told myself like dont get ur hopes up right,

ok and then i was like...WAIT THERES SHERLOCK BLOGS ALIVE!! A LOT OF THEM!!!! and i was like wait no way and there were so many johnlock shippers!! and i was like no way yooo and then i followed people and then boom i felt like i could finally just ship johnlock like freely and there was like so much content and i was like whoa!!! im- wow this is so cool! like the tipping point for me like the green light for me to ship it and i was like omg no way i can ship it :D and after like consuming a lot of fandom content i understood a lot better, the evidence for johnlock, (it was kind of like a muddled puddle in my brain when i finished binging and i knew i shipped it but i just like idk i needed to clear up stuff in my brain) and wow the meta is so good in this fandom like DAMN yall big brains bro...+ gifs and fanart and fics and all the content and like idk the vibes r very cool (tho a bit intimidating haha) and then fandom then inspired me to make gifs so thats actually what got me started to try and learn how to make gifs haha and also to create this sherlock blog! it was awesome like getting to see people who shipped it like me like on my dash...cause i didnt really know many people who well were as crazy about it as i was (def no one i knew irl rip)

so um yeah thats how i kind of got into johnlock! a lot of it was thanks to fandom, like me seeing that johnlock blogs were indeed alive, contrary to what i thought before, and the content that helped me understand stuff a lot better, and i was just like overly hyped that the fandom was still alive haha

thanks for reading through all that 😅im sorry if it doesnt make sense i am writing this at an ungodly hour and i always have a habit of rambling so lmk if anything needs explaining (i...will explain properly lmao not keyboard smashing and whatnot)

thank u for the ask!!

#bluris answers asks #theresnoescapingfromtheheartache #sherlock spoilers #welcome to another ep of: blu overshares #anyway yeah i never really had impressions of ships before getting into shows or books or whatnot #blank slate #so this was p interesting #i didnt hate johnlock i just wasnt sure #but trust me i am so sure now #johnlock ftw #they are so good together i literally cant #thank u for the ask!!#and ims orry u have to read through that mumbo jumbo xD i can write a proper summary if needed #<3 #thanks for sending me asks

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