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holykillercake · 3 years

Text

Barrels, Bets and Balls

pairing: Zoro x Drunk!Reader

word count: 1.9k

summary: The Straw hats are presented with millenary rum from an Ancient Giant Tribe and, well, no one is giving you that anymore.

higlight: ¨And then you said ¨maybe I should wear your underwear.¨

warning: Don´t read and drive.

notes: HOLD MY BEER! Hi, guys! This was a lovely request from @roronoatrash for a drunk s/o! I have to say this is my first time writing a drunk character so I´m a bit nervous hahaha I really really hope you like it! Have fun and drink responsibly! <3 @vemuabhi

𝕷𝖊𝖆𝖛𝖊 𝖈𝖔𝖒𝖒𝖊𝖓𝖙𝖘, 𝖗𝖊𝖖𝖚𝖊𝖘𝖙𝖘, 𝖆𝖓𝖉 𝖑𝖔𝖛𝖊!

¨Agh!¨ you mumbled when you tried to lift your head from the pillow. It felt like the Thousand Sunny had run over you a thousand times.

¨Hm?¨

¨Regret ... mhbeh ... thing...¨ your mouth was so dry that talking became almost impossible.

¨What´s that?¨ Zoro asked, definitely amused by your deplorable state.

¨Hmmm... I don´t... regret... anything.¨

¨Of course you don´t. You don´t remember anything.¨ he shifted on the bed, making it look like a black hole was opening in the mattress. ¨Here, take this.¨ He handed you something.

¨I don´t need your pity... ma-marimo.¨

¨This is not pity, Y/N. This is a painkiller. Come on, you´re gonna feel better.¨

When he helped you to sit on the bed, you noticed something stuck to the window, preventing the sun from entering and blinding you. The greenette removed a few locks of hair that laid plastered across your face before helping you with the herculean task of taking the pill.

¨If the stupid cook is not dead he must have made coffee.¨ he stood up, grabbing your slippers and placing them in front of you.

In the meantime, your mind tried to gather whatever useful information you had to understand what had happened, but everything was a void blank.

¨You ok?¨ he asked, hand on the doorknob. ¨Do you want me to bring it to you?¨

¨No, it´s ok...¨ you pinched the bridge of your nose, making one last effort to remember at least a crumb of the previous hours. You were fast to give up, though. ¨What happened?¨

¨Uhhh, you got drunk and passed out.¨ he said like it was no big deal.

¨Hmm, ok...¨ you took a few seconds to digest his words ¨but when you say ´you´ you mean ´you me´ or ´you guys´?¨

A chuckle left his mouth ¨Come and you´ll see.¨

The sun shone high in the sky, forcing you to wince back into your room like the time you had your shadow stolen. You stumbled and lowered yourself to the floor, crawling away from the light.

¨You go!¨ you said dramatically, covering your eyes ¨Run away and leave me! Tell everyone... that I fought until the last moment!¨

Zoro scoffed at your poorly performed scene, walking closer to you and squatting, back turned to you. ¨Hop, soldier. We don´t leave nakamas behind, right?¨

Your cheeks reddened with his gesture, and you hid your hungover smitten smile on the crook of his neck. ¨Hold tight, Y//N.¨

Oh, I will. Ouch, my head!

As soon as you reached the main deck, your eyes widened, ignoring the bright sun, and your mouth fell in a perfect O.

¨Oh my freaking... what happened here?¨

If it weren't for the countless barrels, you would have easily thought that you had been chewed up by a sea king.

The Straw Hats were scattered across the deck, mixed with garbage, blankets, and rolls of toilet paper. Their unorthodox positions would definitely grant them a stiff neck.

Zoro carried you to the kitchen where you found Usopp and Chopper talking at the kitchen table.

¨... like I fasted in a desert for forty nights, and then I survived... a buster call. And like... all of the battleships were pointed at me. And I was catching fire before that.¨ you heard Usopp whine to the doctor, who wrapped some bandages on him.

¨Oi, who made coffee?¨ Zoro asked purposely loud.

¨SHHHH!¨ you and the sniper hissed at him.

¨Sanji did.¨ Chopper answered ¨Oh, Y/N, how are you feeling?¨

¨Like my heart is beating in my head.¨

¨At least there´s a heartbeat.¨ the swordsman replied, putting you close to a chair so you could take a seat. ¨Hm, Chopper, I saw the cook dead outside.¨

¨Yeah, he made coffee and then passed out again.¨ Chopper discreetly pointed at Usopp´s bandages.

¨He passed out and spilled hot coffee on me!¨ he roared, stopping midway to whine.

¨But you two look pretty good, though.¨ You referred to Chopper and Zoro.

Not Usopp, definitely not Usopp.

¨Night watch. I didn´t drink last night.¨ the doctor sighed, relieved.

¨And I can handle my alcohol.¨ the greenette bragged, placing a steaming cup of coffee in front of you.

¨What happened anyway?¨

¨Oh! You don´t remember too, Y/N? That millenary rum was really strong!¨ Chopper asked, fascinated by the effects of the beverage.

¨Millenary rum?¨

¨Yeah! It was a gift from an Ancient Giant Tribe!¨

¨Giant tribe?¨ you kept repeating every word he said, double-checking to see if you were not hearing things.

¨Y/N, what´s the last thing you remember?¨

¨Hmm, let me see...¨ you rested your elbows on the table, hands covering your eyes. Wow, even thinking hurts.

<~>

¨I swear to God, Tony! When Luffy falls into the water, you can not jump after him!¨ you yelled, panting from climbing back to the ship and soaking wet of salty water.

He pouted and whined. You only called him ¨Tony¨ when you were upset with him.

¨So-Sorry Y/N... AaaAgh...¨ his voice trembled, and you couldn´t help but soften a little.

¨Ugh, forget it.¨ you laid down on the grass and sighed, the reindeer on your belly ¨Are you alright, Chopper?¨

¨Y-Yeah...¨

Zoro emerged a few seconds later, carrying Luffy on his shoulder.

You had engaged in a fight against some bandits who were causing trouble on an island called Gran Brabados. From what you could understand, they were descendants of the Ancient Giant Tribe who emancipated from Elbaf after years of conflict.

¨I don´t wanna be rude, but¨ Usopp spoke to one of them ¨I thought giants were warriors. Like Broggy and Dory. Those guys fought for over 100 years!¨

¨Well, most of us are, but some are not. That's why we left Elbaf.¨ the giant said ¨We're not interested in war, we're interested in rum!¨

All of you stopped for a second, wondering if you heard the same thing.

¨Eh?¨ you spoke.

¨We don´t make war! We make rum!¨ he threw his huge hands in the air, chest puffing out of pride.

¨Oi, really? Give us some!¨ Zoro immediately threw Luffy on the floor and ran towards the giant. Next thing you knew, the giant burst into laughter.

¨Gabababa!¨ he hunched as he laughed ¨Sorry, but tiny people like you can't handle it! Gababababa!¨

You were not sure what offended you the most, he calling you all, who just saved their asses, weak or having to dodge the huge drops of saliva that came out of his mouth.

After insisting a lot, he ended up giving in, presenting the straw hats with barrels and barrels of millenary rum. Yeah, millenary. Rum distilled for one thousand years, or at least that is what he said.

The celebration didn´t take long to begin. Because Luffy had decided to set sail that same day, you would all be bathed with a pleasant sunset as you partied.

¨Wow!¨ you shouted after chugging the first tankard. ¨Oooohh, this is good booze!¨ you shook your head, already feeling the kick.

¨Girl, you should go easy on this. It´s super strong.¨ Franky said, making you scoff at him, possessed by some waspish Viking demon.

¨And here I thought you were hard-boiled.¨

¨What?¨

¨O-Oi, Y/N...¨ Usopp said, worried, sipping his drink.

¨Haven´t you learned anything with Tom-san?¨ you clicked your tongue ¨Meh, I guess I´ll be the one making things with a DON around here!¨ you chugged more of the rum.

The shipwright glared at you with a red beam coming out of his left eye. You remember questioning yourself for a second. Maybe you had said too much, but it was just for a brief second before you insulted someone else.

Back at the kitchen table, flashes of the events from the last night began to pop in your mind. Guilt and embarrassment gushed over you, making you twist and cringe.

¨And then you said ¨maybe I should wear your underwear.¨ Chopper shivered as he quoted your words.

¨Nooo...¨ you cried out.

¨It gets worse, Y/N.¨

¨What?! How?!¨

¨Because after that,¨ Zoro started to speak, and you saw him struggle to stop a smile from cracking. That was not a good sign. ¨you said "your balls are so small Robin could have grabbed them with one hand!¨

The men laughed and slapped the table as you looked for a place to bury your head or a knife to stab yourself in the heart.

¨WHY DIDN´T YOU STOP ME?¨ you yelled, pulling your boyfriend by the collar and shaking him.

He placed a hand on your forehead, a silly thing he did every time you got too nervous. ¨Oi, you´re a big girl. You know what you´re doing.¨

¨Noo, obviously I don´t!¨ He smiled.

He would not be the one to tell you, but he did have to stop Franky from Radical Beam-ing the hell out of you several times. For some reason, you were very keen on insulting the cyborg's masculinity.

Another thing he wouldn´t tell you was that he didn´t touch the rum in the last night. He decided to remain sober and look after you, making sure you would not kill someone or get yourself killed.

However, despite all the trouble you gave him, he recognized your strength. Straw hat after straw hat, you managed to defeat everyone in a stupid drinking contest.

The biggest achievement was to drag Luffy into the game since he dislikes the taste of alcohol. When he denied being part of it, you teased him by saying,¨I think you are just scared, Luffy. You know what, maybe I should be the Captain of this ship! Maybe, I will be the Pirate King!¨

That was about the sixth punch Zoro took for you. Or because of you.

The darker the night fell, the wilder you all got. And then insults began to come from every direction to every direction. You were arguing, then laughing, then crying and apologizing. If it wasn´t for Zoro, Chopper would have had a heart attack.

¨Nami, you thief! Give me back my queen, or I´ll be forced to shoot a Bidori Moshi at you!¨ Usopp yelled, holding a bunch of cards in his hands.

¨Oi, Usopp! How dare you speak with a lady like that?! I´ll kick you in the face!¨

¨Bring it on, Sanji! I eat eggplants like you for breakfast every day! AND IT´S GOD USOPP FOR YOU!¨

¨Zoro...¨ Chopper cried, falling close to where the swordsman was sitting. ¨W-What are we going to do?¨

¨Uh? Ah, sit back and relax. You know these guys, they are ju-¨

¨Y/N-san, may I see your panties?¨

¨Well, too bad for you I´m not weari-¨

¨OI! Y/N!¨ Zoro dashed over, throwing you on his shoulder.

That was about the first punch Brook took for you. Or, again, because of you.

And then, as the number of biological hazards began to decline, managing the situation became easier and easier. Chopper took care of the fallen drunken, and Zoro threw blankets over them.

In the end, it was you and Luffy. You were still arguing about the things you said earlier. Both of you were exhausted but didn´t want to give in. The argument only ended when you withdrew your words, saying that he would be the one to become King of the Pirates.

Luffy fell dead asleep immediately, and Zoro took the cue to approach you. ¨Hey, Y/N. Our time, let´s go?¨

You turned to him and nodded, red cheeks and tired eyes. He had to scoop you up and carry you back to your room since your legs were not part of the equation anymore, and you would let go and fall every time he tried to carry you on his back.

¨Heeey, you´re not drunk!¨ you whined, almost falling asleep. ¨Why aren´t you drunk?¨

¨Cause you drank everything.¨

¨Noo, I can find s´more.¨ you uncovered yourself, trying to get out of bed.

¨I bet you can.¨ he said, covering you again and pulling you closer.

The warmth of his body, altogether with his hand gently rubbing your back, made your system shut down.

¨You know... I can kick your ass... in a drinking contest...¨

¨Yeah,¨ he chuckled ¨I bet you can.¨

That was definitely not true, but for you, well, for you he could pretend it was.

#one piece #oneshot #worst generation #zoro #roronoa zoro #zoro roronoa x reader #zoro x reader #franky #usopp #chopper #luffy #nami #brook #thousand sunny #elbaf #rum #pirate king #opfanfic

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pynkhues · 4 years

Note

So i sent a similar ask to megan because i love peoples thoughts on their own fics and i love snippets soooooo👀 I’m curious what your top five moments in the c&c verse are (which have already happened) and top 5 moments you’re looking forward too?!☺️

Ahhh, thank you! This was such a fun one, haha. It got looooong, so I put it behind a cut! [edit: sorry, the cut doesn’t seem to be working on desktop, but it is on phone? tumblr’s being tumblr! Hopefully it fixes soon?].

Top Five Moments in C&C

1. Annie argues with Beth about the security system in I Could Be Your Welcome.

This was actually one of the first moments I wrote in the C&C ‘verse. I can’t remember the exact context around me writing it, but I remember being interested in Beth’s lack of self-preservation / tendency to ignore danger, and had been thinking a lot about what that would look like in an actual relationship with Rio. It sort of manifested in the thread of Rio buying this expensive security system throughout I Could Be Your Welcome and becomes a bit symbolic of the fact that Beth hasn’t really unpacked any of the realities at that point on what a relationship with a man like Rio means.

Beth is such a stubborn character at the best of times, haha, that I knew I wanted her to dig her heels in on it, and I wanted it to culminate in a fight, and I just loved the idea of Annie being the unlikely voice of reason, and how that reason fell out of how much she loves and worries about Beth.

Here’s my favourite part:

“Yeah, and you need to talk to him about that. But he’s not Dean,” Annie interrupts. “Dean lied for Dean. Dean lied to cover up all the ways he shit the bed, and he shit the bed on like, every level. Comforter, sheets, mattress protector, mattress. Bed frame. Floor underneath. I mean, was there a single inch of your marital bed that wasn’t brown by the end of it all?”

Beth gives Annie a look at that, and Annie laughs to herself, waving soapy arms out and letting the suds drift to the floor.

“With Rio, I think he was - -” and her voice cracks then, her bottom lip wobbling, and she looks briefly away, trying to pull herself together. It takes her a minute to collect herself, to figure out what it is that she wants to say, and when she does, her voice is somehow both raw and firm.

“You’re asking me to be mad that he’s trying to keep you safe, and that’s never going to be something that makes me mad.”

It takes Annie a moment to meet her gaze again, and when she does, her jaw is fixed, even as her lip still wobbles, a tear – blackened with mascara – having stolen down her cheek, catching at the curve of her nose, and - -

And just - -

Dammit.

2. Rio realising why Jane’s upset in Two Hands.

One of the things I find most fun in writing the early days of the C&C ‘verse, is that Beth and Rio flat out do not communicate still, hahaha, and they really just threw themselves into this family without fully knowing what that meant.

Two Hands was very much about that, and in particular about the fact that Rio, in the early days of their relationship, treated Beth’s kids ultimately as extensions of Beth. Two Hands for me marks this turning point in the timeline where he started to really think of each of them as their own people, and consciously commits to building individual relationships with each of them.

Also I love writing Jane, haha. Here’s my fave bit:

“It’s not always like this,” he says, and Jane looks up at him, and there are too many expressions that pass over her round little face – disbelief and childish frustration until it finally settles on somethin’ else, somethin’ softer, less certain, somethin’ he ain’t seen on her face, at least not somethin’ he’s seen directed at him.

“You didn’t say bye,” she says finally, her voice small, and Rio exhales, annoyed.

“I did, darlin’,” because he did. Shit, got to fight about it with Elizabeth and leave Marcus red faced and weepy, made sure of that, but then - -

He looks at Jane and any self-righteousness dies on his tongue.

“Not to you though, huh?” he says softly, and Jane shuffles back into his arm, presses her forehead into his chest, out of sight, the nozzle of the sippy cup sucked into her mouth like a bottle, keeps herself looking away from him, and Rio exhales. He looks down at his bruised hands, then at her feet, where the booties of her onesie hang limply down the side of the couch, her feet lost somewhere in the legs of the thing, the hood of it hangin’ so far down her face it almost covers her eyes, and he reaches up to tug it back, just enough he can see her.

“’m sorry. Think maybe I’m still gettin’ used to this,” he says, because he hadn’t said goodbye to any of Elizabeth’s kids. Had trusted her to do it for him, had treated them like they were just a part of her, but - -

They ain’t.

They’re - -

Well.

Fuck.

Jane looks up at him, her eyes a little glassy and just - - he ain’t sure what that is, the feelin’ in his gut, hollowing itself out. “Can you be the first one I say hey to instead?”

She makes a show of turnin’ it over, her squirming against his chest and drinkin’ that goddamn awful drink he’s made her, but then she nods, and Rio tugs on one of her rabbit ears.

“Hey, Jane,” he says quietly. “You been good for your mama while I been gone?”

And she grins a little at that, shakes her head into his chest again, giggling before she can stop herself, and Rio smiles too, but rolls his eyes.

3. Rio’s non-proposal in Stick to the Rivers

I’m weirdly into the thought of Dean getting married a million times after he and Beth finally divorce. I think Dean’s just affable and charming and goofy enough to trick women into thinking he’s a good guy, and I kind of love the idea that it results in this string of short-term disaster relationships that parallel to the longterm stability and true partnership Beth finds with Rio in C&C.

It’s something I’m definitely going to be exploring in future chapters, but it was really fun to start to in Stick to the Rivers, where Dean tells the kids he’s engaged and Beth and Rio are left to deal with the fallout. I also love the idea of Beth and Rio floating concepts with each other as jokes, even when they mean them seriously, haha, which is how this moment happened:

“Thought you ain’t sayin’ nothin’,” Beth says, imitating his voice, and Rio exhales sharply, squinting down at her in that irritated way that he does whenever she imitates him.

“I ain’t,” he says, gritting his teeth, and Beth arches an eyebrow up at him. “But that dumbass ex o’ yours - - ”

“Is getting married,” Beth replies, refocusing her gaze on the ceiling, and at least that’s enough to make Rio be quiet. It was a dirty trick, and she thinks they both know it, but still - - she just didn’t have it in her for Rio to tell her what she already knew, to have to justify (again) her inaction when it came to Dean.

Rio sighs above her, and she can feel him trying to catch her gaze, but she keeps it fixed steadily on the ceiling, briefly wishing for cracks or cobwebs or anything beyond the pristine surface there to distract herself, only something must distract her, because she doesn’t realise Rio’s undressed or even moved at all until he’s nudging her forwards and slipping into the bath behind her. He pulls her gently back against his chest.

“You’re surprised,” she tells him softly, letting her head loll back onto Rio’s shoulder, her eyes slip shut, feeling his hands stroke down her arms, one coming back up to cup her breast.

“Surprised he managed to trick another woman into gettin’ saddled with his ass, sure,” he replies easily, and Beth huffs out a laugh, beyond the point of being offended by anything Rio says about her and Dean’s marriage.

“You wanna beat him down the aisle?”

And just - - what?

Beth’s eyes snap back open, and she spins a little in the water to look at him, and it’s unfair, the mirth in his eyes, but also the - - something. She can’t quite read it, god, still can’t quite ever know him fluently, so she just squints at him.

4. The whole of Louder Now, Help Me Out

We’re extremely lucky in this fandom to have so many writers who are genuinely SO funny (including you!!), and I am not one of them, hahaha. I always feel like I tend to be a bit clunky when I try to write jokes, but occasionally I think I pull it off, and the installment where Marcus, Jane and Emma ask Beth about sex is one I’m pretty proud of. It still makes me grin when I read it, haha.

“Miss Elizabeth, do you and my daddy have sex?”

Somewhere inside, Beth can hear Kenny and Danny playing video games, can hear lunch gently simmering in the crockpot, can hear the faintest whir of the washing machine working through its cycle. Which is nice, she thinks blankly, her smile not shifting as she tries to process what Marcus has just said to her. She can’t quite look at Ruby, who even out of the corner of her eye she can see has her mouth hanging open, and she definitely can’t look at Annie, even if she does see her drop heavily back down into her chair (doesn’t even have to know for sure to know that she’s grinning).

Beth clears her throat, softening her gaze.

“Who told you that?” she asks, and beside him, Jane shrugs, a suspicious look on her face.

“Lucas Bircher. He said he saw his daddy naked and he put his penis inside his mommy’s butt and then his daddy told him that that was sex and it was how they made babies.”

“Not if it’s in her butt,” Ruby says quietly, taking a sip of her coffee when Beth spins around to glare at her. She drops her mouth open, planning to tell the kids what, she’s not sure, when Jane continues:

“But then we asked Kenny, and Kenny said growed-ups have sex because it’s fun and that you and Mr Rio do it all the time.”

5. Beth finds Rio with Marcus comes home after a bad job in Friar’s Lantern.

Angst though is something I think I write well, haha, and particularly crime-y angst. Friar’s Lantern is a story I was really excited to write, particularly in exploring the dynamic between Beth and Marcus, and the history of Rio and Laura. I liked the idea that Rio and Laura care about each other deeply, but that she was never in crime, and that she hit a breaking point with it in a way that made her really demand that Rio hide a part of himself from her.

In a lot of ways, Friar’s Lantern was about Beth doing the opposite, and demanding that he share himself instead. I wanted to parallel the moment a bit with the dubby too – with parenthood being central to both Beth and Rio’s vulnerabilities and something that has often lead to shifts in their dynamic – so Marcus’ teddy bear formed a really fun device in that sense. Also the image of a bloodied and bruised Rio bringing his son his stuffed animal was just the right sort of angst for me that day, hahaha.

His eyebrow split open, blood trickling from the skin there, down his temple. It looks like he’s swiped it back, once, twice, maybe three times, the blood smeared and dried, caking in his hair. There’s a deep bruise at his jaw, a deep, wide cut at his lip, like he was punched by somebody wearing a ring, and Beth’s gaze travels down him, only to have to swallow a gasp at the blood soaking through his shirt.

He watches her watch him, then says:

“Not all of its mine,” like it’s supposed to make her feel any better about it, and she hates that it does, because god, it’s selfish. She doesn’t want any of it to be his. It can all be the other guy’s. She wants it to be. She can’t summon the words to say anything – barely knows what to, and Rio suddenly jerks his head away from her, looking back at Marcus, and Beth exhales a breath she didn’t know she was holding to have his wounds out of sight again, however briefly.

“I won’t be long,” he says, eyes still on Marcus. “Just droppin’ Otis off, yeah?”

And - - what? Beth blinks, steps closer before she can help herself.

“Where are you going?” she asks, and Rio doesn’t pull his eyes away from Marcus, and Beth just - - stops. A foot or so away from him, and here she can see the blood’s thickest at the arm of his shirt, darkening the navy fabric, and it still looks wet, like maybe it’s still bleeding.

“Got a hotel.”

Beth tears her gaze away from his arm at that, looks up at him, watches him watch Marcus, and god, his jaw is already swelling.

“Why?”

And that’s enough to make him look back at her. Beth wets her lips, feels herself tremble, steps forward again, and when she touches his arm he flinches back like he’s been burned.

Top Five Moments I’m Looking Forward to in C&C

1. Finally writing the housewarming in See You in the Light. There will be drama! Beth will try to run away! Rio might break something! (And we all know how that usually ends, hahaha).

2. Beth and Rio getting married. I never, ever thought I’d write them getting married in any ‘verse, but once I realised the plot for it, it’s been stuck in my head. I have a pretty strong outline for the fic overall, so it’s definitely coming!

3. Another thing I never thought I’d write in this particular fandom was a pregnancy scare fic. I got a lot of C&C prompts for it though, and it’s actually teased out a pretty angsty installment in my head where they do have a scare and it makes them actually have to talk about what that looks like. In it, Beth confirms she doesn’t want anymore children, and Rio reveals that he would’ve liked one with Beth, but that he’d figured that it wasn’t on the cards. It ends up being a pretty bittersweet story where they’re both happy with what they have, but wonder what could’ve been, and what a child who was both of theirs might’ve been like.

4. On a much lighter note, I’ve had a ‘five things’ fic for ages which is actually just a time-jump fic with Beth and Rio teaching each of the five kids to drive, haha. It’s ridiculous, but hopefully pretty fun.

5. And there are a lot more too, but to bring this full circle, haha, there is an installment coming where Rio’s away for business, and, um. The security system is actually used. Think Panic Room vibes.

put “top 5” anything in my ask and i will answer ok go

#the center and circumference #this was extremely fun #omg now i want to write c&c fics haha #welcome to my ama #fic memes #bethrio

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brightokyolights · 4 years

Note

I just saw your tags on the "harry was oppressed" post. Might elaborate on that when you are not tired? How Zayn was oppressed? His relationship to ot4. Other celebrities? I love your thoughts!

*cracks knuckles* buckle your seat belts folks we’re in for a wild ride here lmao.

also for context *here* is the post this anon is referring to

I think to start off i should just make a little disclaimer, everything i am going to discuss will be based in my biases probably seeing as I am also a brown British Pakistani person who is Muslim. Zayn has been someone that especially when i was younger I looked up to and was very essential in my journey of learning to love and accept myself and my culture tbh. It’s cheesy as hell but it’s true and i think this is important to know before I go into this more because like I said i am definitely biased towards him. Another thing is that I’m just going to be discussing my personal opinions and also my memory is not very good so i will probably miss out a lot of other things that happened/could be discussed. please dont take this as anything more than just. my opinion.

A thing that really opened my eyes to racism and especially the racism in the 1d fandom was the day that zayn left. I dont think thats what the post above was about btw and ill go into that but i kind of just want to talk about this. The day he left was. a severe mess. Not only because it was obviously upsetting but because of all the bs that people were spouting about a situation that absolutely no one had any context on. the statement that was released on facebook gave us nothing. literally just stated that zayn was leaving the band and the accusations and hatred people were directing towards zayn when we didnt know what actually fucking happened (and still dont might i add) was disgusting. people accusing him of being selfish and how they hated him and why he had to ruin everything. Accusing him of using mental illness as an excuse and lying about it and so much more. i had unfollow more than half of the people i followed that day. it really opened my eyes to the fact that these were all thoughts and opinions people had underneath it all and zayn was fine as long as he was part of 1d and giving people what they wanted. which was essentially being the token in the group and once he wasnt providing that anymore? people turned and people turned fast.

i think its also important to point out the flip side of it and that was zayn stans saying that 1d were nothing without 1d etc. i want to talk about why this was different from ot4 stans hating zayn. of course it wasnt nice to see or hear EVERYONE arguing with each other. i hated it so much. but i think what people failed to realise was that when it comes to situations like this you need to look deeper and think about all the nuances of the situation. zayn stans being happy about zayn leaving the band and saying 1d was going to die i did not agree with. anyone who knew me then and knows me now knows that i am a 1d stan regardless (preferably ot5 but i supported 1d until the end even as a 4some) BUT these opinions were rooted in his mistreatment in the band and the racism he was having to face as a result of being in the band etc etc i apologise for not being a person who can better describe and explain this situation but hopefully you are getting the picture. when fans were hating on zayn. with no context with nothing. that was based on racism. point blank. the amount of tweets FROM 1D FANS talking about how he was leaving to join isis and how upset fans were gonna be vulnerable and join etc etc all this deplorable bs. and he had to deal with comments like that throughout his whole time with one direction and i imagine even now.

Another thing id like to talk about is who zayn stans at least from my point of view usually were. For me i remember when i first got into the fandom i actively made the decision that i didnt want zayn to be my favourite because i didnt want to be a stereotype and this was a point in my life when i still tried to shun and push my culture down because i was ashamed of it. it was only as i slowly saw that zayn was considered as cool and hot and everyone else liked him that i kind of understood that maybe. being brown was alright and it was something cool and that maybe i was cool. it sounds fucked up and honestly i dont even know if i want to be admitting this so adamantly but argh if it helps someone understand then maybe its worth it. (mortifying ordeal of being known eh?) anyways i noticed as i engaged more in fandom and looked for more diversity, more fans like me, majority of non white fans were also... zayn stans. and honestly it makes sense because we all tended to flock towards the closest diversity we could find it seems. im not saying that there werent white zayn stans and that the other boys didnt have non white stans but i just wanted to point out this trend. so when you also take this into account and the fact that on the day zayn left it was majorly... white stans who were criticizing zayn it puts it in perspective for you. majority of fans who still like and support zayn are also not white.

there is a lot more to do with fans but hopefully thats enough of an insight and you can understand the kind of vibes that were present during 1ds prime and what not only zayn had to go through but also as a result the racism we ended up having to deal with as well tbh.

now!!!... something i dont really like talking about lol so this will probably be short but the other boys. so as far as i can remember liams always been kind to zayn since hes left (no surprise there <3 also please correct me if im wrong), niall was kind of indifferent/didnt say anything really, and then there was louis and harry *awkward smile*. hahaha. from my memory i remember when asked about what the most difficult thing was about zayn leaving harry said ‘the paperwork’ which was *awkward smile* and he also kicked that monkey mask/pinata? i cant remember with naughty boys face on it and honestly im sure theres more but his overall reaction to zayn leaving was kind of not caring and maybe being slightly nasty which :) with louis there was the massive twitter fight which literally tears my soul in half so lets not go into that haha and honestly other things where it maybe seemed like he was upset with zayn leaving as well. honestly i am a bit in two minds about these reactions because at the end of the day we dont know what occurred behind the scenes and we probably never will as much as we can speculate or whatever. not to mention that this 10th anniversary it seems maybe everyones on good terms which, who knows really im going to try be optimistic. i think whats important to note about heir reactions is that we dont know anything about their situations but the problem was really how fans reacted tbh (btw i forgot to mention earlier this is about basically everything except for harry and the nb thing. that is inexcusable). the boys reactions were understandable but the problem is that fans of course vicariously are influenced by the boy they stan so when one of them acted a certain way of course that ended up reflecting in fandom and resulted in more racism etc.

another thing with zayn was that there were many files leaked with like promo or whatever basically describing what kind of role the boys would take on/ their image etc. and of course all the other boys got things like bubbly/funny/charming etc and zayns descriptors? moody, mysterious, dark horse etc etc like from the inception of 1d zayn has been victim to racist stereotypes being pushed on him. and i think this is where harry comes in because of course the image pushed onto him was also extremely harmful and i definitely dont think we should not talk about that but often you'll see that... thats all that is talked about because people are uncomfortable admitting racism and talking about it.

When i mentioned other celebrities my point was basically just that while ive only talked about zayn in one direction this... is so present among any and every fandom. 5sos, Little Mix, Fifth Harmony... any fandom you can think of, i promise you it is there. racism in fandom is a real thing and a big problem and honestly this is why i always say representation is so important. and when i say that i mean everywhere!!! because if I didnt seek out non white fans to follow then maybe i would’ve had a completely different perspective on all of this.

The thing is also that a lot of this is just stuff that we’ve been able to get our hands on and also fan analysis and theories etc. there is probably so much more to talk bout or go into or stuff we’ll never even know about. I’ve kind of had to make peace with the fact that with celebrities you just really don’t actually know anything about them.

I think i’ll end this here if there’s any more questions you have about anything feel free to ask! and again this is all just my opinion but hopefully i’ve been able to help answer you <3 have a nice day and i hope youre hydrated!!!

#ask #anon #1d #zayn #long post #i also have links to posts for proof of how zayn was treated on the last day if youd like but i thought id simplify #and just talk about what i though #there really is so much more that can be said

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existentialburden · 4 years

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What is your OC’s strongest childhood memory? Why and how as that impacted him/her?What is your OC’s imagination like?How many times did your OC move as a child? Which area was his/her favorite?What does your OC think of children- either in general or about having them?What kind of mother/father would your OC be?

I TYPED OUT A BIG-ASS RESPONSE TO THIS AND TRIED TO BACKSPACE SOMETHING AND IT WENT BACK IN MY HISTORY INSTEAD I’M SO FUCKING UPSET... BRO I’M GONNA CRY........ I WAS FINISHING UP THE LAST QUESTION WHAT THE FUCK WHO MAKES BACKSPACE A SHORTCUT????

what is your OC’s strongest childhood memory? why and how has that impacted them?

tbh Enny spent a lot of her childhood repressing things and blocking stuff out but she has vivid memories of some shitty things that uh. messed her tf up. and continue to sorta mess her up but also the nightmares get her to admit to needing help so there’s that. Deux also sorta went through life in a daze, for a different reason, but her strongest memory is just hangin out with a friend from before SBURB. she tends to think of him when things get rough because he’d give her an earful if she had the chance to be captain of a space pirate ship and she just up and died instead. Aila has zero memories that stand out in her mind- it’s all just vague. Hope has crystal-clear memories of times other people made her feel shitty for one thing or another and that contributed to her more toxic behavior in the past. she’s working on getting past that.

what is your OC’s imagination like?

Aila’s imagination goes WILD. her and Enny can both picture perfect images in their heads, but Aila can think up full original settings for things and Enny’s gets put to use thinking up images she’s seen before. they both have the anxiety imagination for things that could be fucked up though.

how many times did your OC move as a child? which area was their favorite?

not counting SBURB, West’s moved twice! they don’t remember the first place, but the second place was where they met Fern, and that was nice. they really liked being there. the third place they weren’t in long before SBURB hit so they didn’t get as attached to it. Hope moved twice too, but one was moving back. she uh. likes the first and last spot. she didn’t like going to school at the second location.

what does your OC think of children- either in general or about having them?

Enny has a soft spot for kids. she projects onto them a little too easily so she ends up wanting to make sure they’re okay and keep them safe. she ends up adopting West in the ultragod AU :)! she doesn’t mind taking care of kids and thinks it’s important for them to have a good upbringing. Aila on the other hand doesn’t HATE kids but she would prefer not to interact. being in charge of the ectobiology was exhausting. she very much would like to not have kids ever no thank you. she’ll play along with kids if she has to though. not gonna be a dick about it. Hope loves kids! she thinks they’re adorable and she’s good at interacting with them. she would love to have kids of her own! the idea of being a mom is exciting to her. Deux is mostly neutral on kids. she just. they’re so TINY. how do you interact?? how are you supposed to talk to them?? she doesn’t understand and the idea of being in charge of such an impressionable lil thing is terrifying. she guesses she could though. since she managed to heard the rest of the space pirate crew and all. probably not that different right? West loves kids but HAHAHA NO THANK YOU. none for them thanks. imagine being responsible for another human being! and trying not to fuck that up! no thanks! they’ll babysit though. Fern thinks kids are cute. they’re so full of life and emotion and that’s adorable. once she gets a lil older she thinks she’d like a kid of her own. she feels confident in her ability to raise a kid. be responsible for them and teach em things they need to know. Haze is. uh. kids are a huge ol’ question mark because Haze has never really interacted with a lot of children? so Haze doesn’t know on that one. Alex finds the concept of kids sorta gross. like who wants to have a puke machine that cries and also relies on you? that sounds awful. every moment of that sounds awful. no fucking thank you. they’re uncomfortable around all children. June thinks kids are alright and all but would NOT like one of xir own. xe would totally fuck it up. xe’s sure of it. xe got through SBURB but parenthood is a different story and one xe would not like to read because that’s a whole different set of skills needed and that’s scary. that’s TERRIFYING. dear god. Orca on the other hand aggressively wants a kid. or kids? no no start with one work from there see how it goes. they think kids are adorable and also really cool because like... there’s a spark in kids that’s just so full of energy and Orca thinks that’s wonderful. part of them is worried they inherited some sort of bad parent gene from Enn[DACTED] but they do want a kid. Theo is p neutral on kids but he thinks they’re a lot better than people give them credit for. like. everyone always ribs on kids because of LEARNED BEHAVIORS. that’s not always on them. honestly he wouldn’t mind kids but that’s not really a subject on his mind often. Fate thinks children are ADORABLE and thinks they’re treated unfairly by adults. take the time to learn how kids express themselves cowards!! she admires how they just imagine things because their brains have to fill in how the world works. when it comes to kids of her own she isn’t sure. she thinks she’d much rather be an aunt to Theo’s if he has any. Luca is uh. Luca can entertain kids but he doesn’t really want any of his own. that’s... he doesn’t think he could take care of a kid when he can barely take care of himself. it’d be bad for him and the kid. no thanks. he’s also uncomfortable around kids in general. Enzo thinks that babies are ADORABLE and that kids are creatures of chaos and he loves it. he personally thinks he would make an excellent dad. no one would ever willingly hand him a child though and he’s not exactly going out of his way to get one.

what kind of parent would your OC be?

Aila would not be a great mom. she tries y’know? but she doesn’t uh. engage with her kid’s interests a lot. and she’s not great at the whole being a mom thing. she wouldn’t be the WORST mom but ehhhhh could be better. Enny would be an EXCELLENT mom! engages with her kid but makes sure she gives them their own time and their own space and stuff. Hope would be a p good mom! she lets her kid make their own mistakes but is always there for them to confide in and lean on. sometimes she has a short burst where she overcompensates for her own perceived overbearingness by maybe giving her kid a lil too much space and not showing affection as much but she handles things well. Deux is uh. just bad at being an adult. she messes around with her kid and plays with them but she can’t discipline to save her life. or hold her kid accountable. or. uh. parent. leading a gang of space pirates is different from parenting okay?? West would be an okay parent, but they’d struggle with settling down anywhere and well. they didn’t want a kid to begin with. not a good start y’feel? they would try though. maybe just. uh. hey Orca you wanted a kid right?-- Fern would be a great parent. she maybe gets a little overbearing because she gets WORRIED but she’s good with balancing her kid’s needs with everything else. she’s so used to balancing so many things. also she loves her kid and makes it really obvious that she’s proud of them and will be proud of them no matter what. Haze would not be a good parent. Haze likes control too much. that’s all there is to be said on that. Alex would also Not Be A Good Parent. they didn’t want kids and it shows. they mostly just sort of. get other people to take care of their kid. June would be a surprisingly good parent once xe got over xir terror. like huh. this isn’t so bad. xe can do this. xe can parent! this isn’t as terrifying as xe thought it would be and dang okay this kid is adorable. yeah. yeah xe can handle this!! xe doesn’t always know what to do but xe tries and xe finds out what xe needs to know. Orca would be a great parent! they’re still worried about fucking up their kid but they start getting their own issues sorted out beforehand so they can take care of a child. they keep those issues in their therapy sessions and don’t try to dump that all on their kid. they adapt to how their kid interacts with the world instead of trying to make their kid work the way they want them to and they’re really good at parenting! with Spike things go a little off the rails when they find out SBURB’s starting again and their kid is gonna be involved with it but if it weren’t for that... Luca would be a p iffy dad on his own. he would try so hard but he doesn’t keep up the habits he wants his kid to keep up with and he’s too nervous about it and it all just sort of becomes a big mess. Enzo would uh. god I don’t want to even begin to think about Enzo with a kid. he would Do His Best. but at the same time it’s very likely that if Enzo has a kid in his arms he stole them. like legit he would steal a baby. that is on-brand. like... he wouldn’t necessarily be a BAD dad... but someone’s gonna come for his ass right? right?? the kid would grow up in an insanely strange environment but y’know what they’d turn out more functional than Luca’s kid so I consider that a win.

#egby says shit #ask #I DID IT. I FUCKING DID IT. I REWROTE IT ALL AND ADDED MORE AND NO WE DO NOT GET THEO OR FATE AS PARENTS BCAUSE I GOT SCARED I WOULD LOSE IT #AAAAAAAAAAAA TY ANON!!!!!!!!!!!!!!#imagine being less functional than ENZO.#rip to Luca but god damn

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raguna-blade · 4 years

Text

Revolutionary Girl Utena Live(ish) Reaction Episodes 8-11

So it's a new year, and I'm gonna continue this, cause its' fun. Had a brief break cause of the holidays. And doing so, I figure i'm gonna do a thing where I make up a nice cleaned up version of these cause if nothing else I like organizing my thoughts. So Control F or whatever your find function is for the cleaned up version if that's your thing. It'll be under Overall Thoughts per ep. Or you know, you're me and you're going back through this for validation for whatever nonsense you say later.

Episode 8

Curry huh? And another recap? uh....

enmy remains trifling

hey wait egg time already?

Danger? Really?

Body swap? Also egg time is goofs

throwin hands????? anthy?

Yeah nanami it is ridiculous

JERSUS TOGA

nanami you idiot

She just fucked off to india to get some weird back alley spice

Shadow girls can you please, just please for a single episode.

ANTHY YOU LYING. Never been good at sports and you did that leap apparently pretty well? What the fuck.

Also, the switching thing here is mad suspect considering the end theme thing (and I suppose the opening.

Utena as Anthy : I don't want to be a sacrifice of the rose seal.

Anthy As Utena: I'm super down staying like this actually.

Like..This is just details that

Uh..Uh saionji what. The implications are strong here. Also, Douche canoe he is, but he's a romantic apparently? UUUUH. Exchange diary.

Is the “A” plot a distraction? Like for real.

Also she took that elephant to the dome.

I'm not sure how to take this personality switch. Like the minds thing whatever, but if it's just the personalties but not the person so to speak, hold on

WHAT THE FUCK. These elephants for fucking real?

Anyway, if they're just personalities altering the “person” it's uh...Interesting. I'm not sure how to take that til I get more info. It seems like a thing.

Also, Saionji apparently legit has feels for Anthy he's just...mad dumb about expressing it? Like he's pulling a lot of Badboy Romance Tropes here but...not...in a badboy romance. Which kills his behavior entirely.

Killed his Soul AGAIN. Damn.

Who's the divine justice for? Like it doesn't seem for nanami. Who fucked up. Presumably between anthy and utena.

Anthy what the actual fuck are you doing. Are you using gunpowder?

Homie, this isn't twilight, go home saionji.

Anthy as Utena(????) you trolling. So hard.

Saionji get's zero respect but dudes dedicated I'll give him that. Fitting for bad boy romance lead.

Uh...Wait, actually, are they all romance leads? Common ones in one way or the other. They are on the student Council so...Hm. I don't read enough romance stories of the variety I think but it seems to fit? I'm not sure what juri would be in that case.

Anyway, if this Episode Turns out to be a key for understanding things I'm gonna be pissed. Just a little.

Overall Thoughts: So this and the other “filler” episode is, especially after finishing my last ep in the session, read as anything but despite the obvious uh...antics on display. Like...

Ok, so the whole thing with the ending which frames Anthy and Utena as kinda the same (or rather exactly the same, except one's in red and the other pink) makes this whole episode feel like it's basically some kind of key for understanding everything else because it's simple times. It's goofy hilarity with Nanami that's the A Plot right hahahah....

Except the personality swap between the two of them is like...The implication here is that they swapped minds fully, and given the level of fairy tale bullshit that is at play constantly in this series so far it may well just be magic brand magic and we're supposed to roll with it. Ok. Fair.

Except...The thought that sits in my head is again, Anthy and Utena seem to equal each other. Hell I point it out slightly later that there's definitely this yin yang thing going on in the opening with the two which is so blatant as to be meaningless because Hah Yeah these are our two leads obvs and they're important to each other so hahah don't worry about or think about it check out these SWEET SWORDSMANSHIP MOMENTS FROM EVERYONE LOOK AT THE BUDGET AND COOL HORSES AND CASTLES HAHAHA.

But ok, if it's a Yin Yang thing, yes they're not the same but they have elements of each other within eachother. So if it's just a personality swap but not an actual soul swap thing, that is, Anthy is just acting like Utena's personality is in her, and Utena is just acting like Anthy's personality is in her it paints this picture of Utena and Anthy as having a lot going on under the surface. I mean obviously Anthy is fucking pissed at Saionji. That was really really evident in episode one because if she's just being submissive rosebride I do what i'm told and I do what i'm told I do what i'm told, the very very very sharp dig of “We're Just classmates” is fucking brutal unnecessity. And given that she DOES know what he feels for her, and he's still acting like that, her being vindictive(or just brusque really, he's being an ass full bore) is like...absolutely reasonable.

Her Slapping back and about to throw hands with her tormentors? Who wouldn't want to right?

But then, ok that's Anthy, but what about Utena. If it's just a mind swap, Utena...want's a very defined existence? Like, she wants to just stick to a role? Feels weird, and doesn't quite immediately jive with her cause that seems against her operations right? Except, as this episode so kindly reminds us (for at least the third time in 8 episodes which seems excessive. I might be forgetting one or two) Utena's whole thing coming to this school is I want to play the Role of the Prince, whatever that actually means. Playing the Rose Bride would be no real difference, except it's way more submissive.

So that aside, Saionji saying he's in love with Anthy (and that seems to be something he at least believes to be true. He honestly seems more into Toga. Like for real for real, all the imagery of those flashbacks reads not just as close buddies, but as I am romantically down with you Toga my guy. Him being Bi is probably the easiest answer, and he just drifted away from Toga for a while. Saionji clearly sees him as a friend and rival, although it's seemingly not reciprocated at the moment.

But the thing, the thing that's kinda weird to me, is that if he does legit have feelings for her, I was struck with this odd vibe that he's playing at being a romance lead. Specifically, a Bad Boy romance lead. And doing so SPECTACULARLY badly. Homeboy is sitting here busting out poetry (unless my brain is being a dumb and i'm somehow overlaying him with Tatewaki Kuno from Ranma which ok, weird but alright) but...

Ok, if he is playing at being a Badboy Romance lead, that actually explains his behavior for how he was treating Anthy, especially if he's legit in his feelings for her? Possessive, Radiates Danger, Engages in Creepy Behavior, is a bit of a dick, etc. It lines up with Being a Bad Boy, except that the way that those usually work out in fiction, as I understand it, they're not usually like...gonna hit you. That breaks the fantasy. But...That's him fucking up the archetype. It doesn't fit for him. He doesn't understand what he's doing in that archetype.

Like yes, abusers and the like can care and still be absuers cause fucked up behavior and motivations don't need to match in the least, but it still feels odd that a man who probably literally could have done any number of fucked up things has...an exchange diary with the girl he says he cares about? And it's not like he's unaware of how submissive/passive she is, his exchange diary actually kinda reads like Utena's Anthy is A Real Girl! Activities*. He wants her to be active part of whatever their relationship is and...Eh.

But ok, if he's that, It suggests the rest of the student council, and duelists in general, would fit into a given archetype right? Toga is clearly the super cool intelligent superman student council president, Juri is basically charisma max Jock, Miki is the cute nerd, Nanami is the Ojou villainess type, Utena is...Basically the Hero type, just morals, strains to upset the status quo, Has the Cool Original Uniform.

And they all kinda fit into those pretty thoroughly, kinda like they're trying to (to varying levels of awareness)

Anyway, I'll hit on some of the other stuff in the next Ep. It's a bit more relevant there I think.

*See Me In Episode 11

Episode 9

I just realized they're doing some kinda yinyang thing in the opening so

R V G FIGHT.

Pretty tense there. Toga went straight for the heart which i'm sure means nothing.

Old Friends? Phrasing seems uh...odd? Unsure if it's dub things or actual subtext. Or both.

Dude you really got beef with a monkey? No, utena.

Being a huge dick. As is tradition.

10 Years.

Saionji: Actually love her (said) but

This is mad gay. Like the lighting, the silhouette. Saionji you're sublimating something here.

Music, Silhouettes.

...Silhouettes show truth? uh.

They were Utena's folks funeral? Huh. Also, why on earth would Utena be kidnapped? Who she be?

….Three coffins. Uh. Uhhhhhh. Utena, Toga, Saionji? UuuuHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH?

Dead utena. Uh.

Toga: Ally to all women. Ok.

...Why is there a third coffin?

Something Eternal huh? And Utena wants to die for reasons understandable.

Find another coffin. Rose Sigils on the coffins. Uh. Uhhhhhhhhhhhh.

Saionji: Hey, this is nuts, we should stop her.

Toga: Nah, I'm gonna Ennable the shit out of this.

Tiny Utena with the White Rose?

Saionji: Did he do something to her?

Toga: Nope

Uh....

Anthy: Something Eternal in the castle. I want to go there.

Also impressive grip strength considering. Flat.

Does Toga Remember this or...? I can't be sure. Saionji certainly didn't recognize her, but he wasn't like right on top of the trauma child.

Toga white roses? Uh? Uhhhhh. I think he definitely remembers. But questions abound.

Ufo's shadow girls? Shadow girls having flesh is deeply concerning.

TRUE FRIENDS ARE JUST FANTASIES. OK.

And UFO's broke, so that's probably not great. Who's getting the Revelations today.

That is the fakest voice toga what the fuck

Badboy Saionji: We're Gonna get the eternity.

Also, I just realized they (saionji and anthy) have color inversions going on which is making me kinda wonder if they're related in some way?

Just slap the shit out of him that's fair.

Ok, so Saionji didn't(?) do the dumb thing. Ok,

that is...a coffin. That he's 100% obssessed with. With Anthy (Utena) inside.

He's looking like he kissed his own mom right now, goin full oedipus in the holy shit revelations here.

Castle is crumbling, falling down. So...Eternity is Fake. Ok. Sure. Didn't shadow girls say that?

Castle Immediately tried to kill him. Crushed his soul 1 time too many there I suppose.

Utena, meanwhile, dove super deep into saving anthy which...diving deeper into the fantasy?

Yeah, they all just saw things.

Saionji: WHAT THE FUCK JUST HAPPENED WHATS GOING ON?

Bro, me too.

Ok, if the two are reflections, does Anthy and saionji both got some deep illusory bullshit going on? Are they both freaking out?

Toga, saving the day, and Saionji, tried to kill Utena with a sword. so. Ok.

Saionji Expelled? Toga, fool for thinking they're friends?

WHAT THE FUCK HAPPENED HERE?

Overall Thoughts: I touched on a bunch of the Saionji stuff I wanna talk about in the last episode review, but the thing I kinda want to look at here is well...

Ok, Now the colors probably don't mean anything, but there was this moment that Saionji and Anthy were in the same shot and I suddenly realized they're color flips of each other. Purple hair green eyes, Green Hair Purple eyes, which ok that's interesting.

So we already have Utena Reflecting on Anthy, and hey, there's Zero Reason, absolutely negative number reasons why that wouldn't necessarily be the case with any and all of the rest of the duelists to some degree or another.

And hell, the fact that we keep flipping back and forth between Utena and Anthy in Coffins, there being (for some weird ass reason) a third entirely unrelated coffin for Utena's folks funeral, why the fuck not right?

So ok, Anthy and Saionji mirror each other which...Ok. If the Personality Swap from Episode 8 thing holds, The two actually share some pretty dickish actions. They can be cruel and petty and just antagonistic to things that don't quite jive with what they want. Saionji with Anthy not being...whatever he's expecting out of her, or Utena butting in. Anthy with the girls who keep fucking with her and Saionji.

They both seem to be utterly STUCK on the Rose Bride thing, although from different angles of Possessing the Rosebride and being the Rosebride, and the kind of weird shaping of the Rosebride thing that's going on.

Saionji is treated as a joke by the student council, especially after he get's kicked out, which ultimately ends with him being someone who is generally wanted but ends up ultimately exiled from society. Which mirrors with Anthy as someone is is wanted, but doesn't seem to have ANY kind of actual tangible bonds with anyone.

And, for this last one I have ZERO evidence on the Anthy end, but the suggestions are uh..interesting. Saionji in this episode, as suggested by the shadow girls at least in part, is deeply deeply invested in a fantasy of some kind, one that ultimately leaves him crushed and rather empty, further exiled from people who could or do care for him and that he cares about. Which if we're going with the property sliding across and He's a Foil for Utena (which I think is definitely true in some ways) suggests bad things for her down the line.

Episode 10

Saionji's a joke huh? He's taking it well.

Toga WOW. WOW YOU FUCKING DOUCHE. STRAIGHT IN THE FIRE HUH.

EGG TIME.

So, thing about eggs, that includes whats inside it right? so...Revolutionize yourself right? Right? That's obvious right?

Oh new duelist. Cool cool.

Utena getting slapped. By Nanami. With Utena being hella submissive. (EPISODE 8 FLASHBACKS INTENSIFY)

maybe a girl can't be a prince. THERES THAT THESIS. E8 FLASHBACKS

Nanami got her brother a kitty.

Oh damn it is Nanami. Duel Time. I mean we sall it in the opening but you know.

Jesus Toga, please stop being

OH GOD NANAMI NO. NOOOOOO NOPE NO.

Toga: We ain't kids no more. Shit don't fly.

Nanami: Emotionally devastated.

Is that Miki's sister?

Hey, what happened to the cat?

Juri: Hey, Serious Business, what the fucks up with the duelist?

Toga is perpatrating as badly as nanami actually. He's just less immediately obvious about it I guess.

Goddamnit there's Anthy's next slap. Jesus. Legit, who hasn't at this point. Is this a theme? IS THIS A THING?

Jesus, he's just playing all of this to piss her off? What the fucks up.

...Did nanami kill the cat. Uh...Uhhhhhh.

Ring is an engagement ring. Wait, that's a flat out school rule that everyone knows? For real? Uh.

...What the fuck happened with the kitty. Uh...

ITS TIME. ABSOLUTE DESTINYYYYYYYYYYYY

I just realized the kinda weird framing with Anthy dressing up utena kinda looks like her opening her legs up with the way it get's framed and I'm not sure if that's me just kinda over reading things or if that's a thing.

Nanami's duel outfit is SICK. Also, a yellow alt color of utena.

Actually. ACTUALLY? Is...Is Nanami like an Utena Alt color? That can't be right. Actually looking at them right next to each other they're...straight up alt colors of each other. Not to mention Nanami's my prince thing mirrors Utena.

She just HOT pulled a knife. Oh she's About to fucking hot MERC utena, going for death jessus.

They're supposed to be around the same age too for that matter right?

She absolutely killed that cat and it's...

With her hair down she does look like an utena alt color even more.

Why's the duel music still going after the duel finished. Jesus. This wasn't a duel with Nanami, it was a duel with Toga, and I think Utena Hot lost it out and out.

Overall Thoughts: Well the Big thing I'm paying attention here are two. First the simpler one.

The Egg has to break the shell of the world to be born right? I'm paraphrasing badly, but the thing is the way they keep phrasing that is that the World is the Egg, but the egg isn't just the shell right? It includes what's inside of it. Which if that's the case, mixed with the way that duels work out being more a clash of ideals than of actual tangible skill, the revolutionize the world bit seems to be referring to them themselves, that is the duelists.

Alternatively, the Bird Referenced, the thing being revolutionized is Anthy. Which...Is an interesting line of thought. Given the Duels as a whole are basically choosing who her fiance will be, that'd imply that ultimately this decides the way that Anthy would come to develop? Or how she chooses to develop? Which ok if so, and the way that Ideals seem to be at play, Suggests...What? Dunno. Need more info, which will be delivered later.

But the other thing here, continuing the mirroring thing, which might be me reading too deeply, but I think not and even if it is Whatever I'm having fun.

THE ENTIRE NANAMI DUEL felt like a Mirror Match.Heck, Nanami dressed like an alt color of Utena, and especially once her hair got undone she looked even more like an alt color of Utena. They're only about a year different in age, and her brother seems to be her Prince type, and he drops the ring on her like an engagement ring, and she basically says I fight like my brother because he's my ideal.

Which is a weird thing since right now it's not going...too far. I'll have to see how it shakes out, but if the mirroring thing continues, the fact that the moment she lost she basically said nope fuck that, Knife Time, was...Concerning. It says real concerning things with Utena.

But it also says other interesting things then, because if Nanami is supposed to be some kind of Alt color Utena, similar in ambition goals and the like, if more outwardly girly to Utena's princey thing, their relationship with Anthy is uh..

Uh...

Well put simply, Utena is fucking up big and dramatic with Anthy, and she doesn't realize it at all or care because she can't see it for what it is. Nanami actively tries to undermine Anthy, and does some fucked up things to her. Which..Makes me wonder about the Divine Judgement thing from Episode 8 which, damnably, seems to be forming some kind of key here.

Like the way it's frame suggests the divine Judgement being visited upon Nanami is what's being talked about. But ok, Nanami had some bad shit happen to her sure, but...All of that was self inflicted upon her trying to fix what she percieves as a problem. Yes her reasons for doing it are so she can be with her brother, no doubt, but...They're ridiculous. Like, I cannot believe this shit is happening. But

But

If the Target of Divine Judgement/punishment is the Anthy Utena duo, one or both of them are on the receiving end of it. It's not clear how Acting like Utena would be a punishment for Anthy (I'm sticking with it just being a personality swap and not a full mind swap) but Utena who prides herself on being princely and aspires to that being the super submissive rosebride? I could see that being a kind of hell for her. And if the logic of Utena is Undermining Anthy holds out, but the criitcal difference being her ignorance and dishonesty of why compared to Nanami unabashedly saying yes I am fucking doing this fuck you I get what I want no hold barred, it...

Like, Nanami, as far as it goes, doesn't really receive a punishment if we're being honest. Yes she takes a couple of elephants to the dome, and has to be away from her brother and see her thing fail but..The way it's treated by herself and everyone else is basically a LOL THESE THINGS HAPPEN I GUESS HAHAHA. The Utena/Anthy swap meanwhile seems considerably more serious for them (especially considering the Everyone Slaps Anthy thing that seems to legit be a thing. Somehow. Except here Applied to “Utena”), and seems to cause some serious distress.

We'll see I guess.

Episode 11

As I watch this opening more and more, why is anthy like constantly framed like...Ominous as shit? Is it me?

Homegirl is just. Damn. Sure glad NOTHING BAD WILL HAPPEN (I do not trust this series to not have something bad happen to Wakaba. Again.)

Anthy. Are..are you...passive aggressively doing...something

Toga: I can see through the illusions yeah boi.

I do not trust this for an inch. He is abusing the shit out of his framing, like the whole time, and I don't trust.

Toga is “student council prince” archetype. Miki's nerdy student counciler.

EGG TIME

Juri is...Antagonistic But well meaning?

Saionji...I'm not sure he was actually on the stuco. But if so, bad boy.

What....is with the balloons. The color coded balloons.

Miki: Like a Pet Cat.

The Pet Cat that died, got killed.

WHAT IS WITH THESE BALLOONS.

ALSO I SEENT YOU PURPLE BALLOON.

So if the duels are ideal clashes more than actually a matter of direct skill, is this Toga (touga?) trying to fuck with Utena before the fight?

Anthy is a Bird. Ok. And Toga, arguably, being the biggest dick here. We thought it was Saionji, but the trick was he's the red part of the rose.

Anthy shut down REAL quick when being the rose bride was brought up.

Is Utena projecting mad hard onto Anthy here?

Homeboy needs to stop playing these games.

Utena, Stahp. DO NOT TRUST HIM.

Toga, You...DOUCHE. AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAARGH

Toga: Oh My B, Shouldn't act that way in front of the rose bride. ALSO DUELING LETS GOOOOO.

Utena: one link forces me to fight him. Meanwhile, rose symbols everywhere, a lot of them brought in by anthy.

Hmmmmmmm.

Utena is hard not understanding something here. I don't know what (rose bride related for sure) but I don't get...WHAT is off here.

Cause thinking about it, Utena's objective with Anthy is arguably the most noble, but she's still not quite treating anthy as a person.

….William Tell Interlude is SUITABLY CONCERNING considering the above thoughts so uh.

Also that was a weirdly specific number. 30K arrows or something?

I just realized that the DARKNESS OF DARKNESS OF LIGHT OF DESTINY OF (INSERT) things seems to show up right around anthy a lot. I'm not super sure if that's a whole thing or just a this episode thing, but...

Is Utena about to get HOT DUNKED? Because I think she is.

Also, I just realized, Utena slid into that pull sword out of rose bride thing right quick and she's never once questioned that.

So yes, Utena has BOOTY but cheeks swordsmanship, which yeah, obvs. Two of the people she beat were actually skilled before this fight, and yet she won somehow.

I don't know how to deal with these lyrics. But Toga is absolutely fucking with her head here.

And She Lost. Decisively. YUP. WELP THIS IS GONNA BE A THING NEXT TIME.

Toga: Hey you don't have to deal with this bullshit anymore.

Utena is doing the EXACT same shit Miki and Saionji were pulling, and Anthy's blank soulless stare is freaking me the hell out. Again.

So, ideals here. But the idea that whoever has a...better grasp of the truth is the victor. Which makes sense that Toga wins here.

Jesus, Soul crush 2.0, except it's on Utena this time. Goddamn.

WELL NEXT EPISODE PROMISES TO BE FUN.

Utena: ITS NOT TRUE. ITS NOT TRUE!

The Anime Revolutionary Girl Utena IMMEDIATELY: MISSING TRUTH ETCETC HOLD ME IN YOUR TRUE ARMS I WANT TO KEEP SMASHING LIES APART

SURE THAT MEANS NOTHING GUYS GGNORE.

Also, no joke, these seem like a Direct response to this episode and I'm not sure how to feel about that.

I want to be hated by lies? Uhhhhh.

Overall Thoughts: So Hey, Here we are in Episode 11 and I want to talk about how Utena and Saionji basically are each other right here.

Like overtly even I think, even if the actions aren't precise clean mirrors to each other which I guess is just how i'm going to be going through this series right now RiP.

But ok, here's the thing. What has been increasingly clear as time goes by is that Utena is fundamentally misunderstanding something about Anthy. I'm not sure fully what it is, but it's clearly Rosebride related, and the thing with the clashing ideals suggests that the.

Actually let me explain that clear like. Right now my read on the Duels is that they are NOT in any way shape or form a demonstration of skill. I Think that's clear through this point, but I'm making it explicit for my own sake. The Victor of the Duel isn't the better fighter. If that were the case, It'd suggest the only ones in the running at all would be Toga or Saionji (Juri should also be in here, but I'm not actually clear how skilled she is compared to those two, and the way they're treated suggests that Toga and Saionji are comparable in pure skill/ability.)

But Utena somehow beat Saionji like three times, Juri and Miki. Miki's whatever, but Juri clearly knows what she's doing, and Saionji seems to be Kendo Team captain so you know. Up there. Meanwhile, Utena explicitly is an amateur.

I'm not saying, in full, that actual skill with the blade is a null thing, but your ideals seems to be the biggest factor over everything else. Presumably, people rocking equally “powerful” ideals would fall to skill with the sword.

Anyway. The Truths that Seem to be critical are Anthy Wants to Be Free of the Rosebride. Ok, so Utena has the right read then right? But then she lost to Toga who seems to be rocking Anthy Wants to Be, or else Considers herself fundamentally to be, the Rosebride, which is something that Utena seems to be denying about Anthy, but is none the less true.

But then, How are Utena and Saionji the same? Well, remember an episode back where I was talking about the divine punishment thing and all that jazz from episode 8?

It hits both of them for mistreating the Rosebride. There is a fantasy going on between Utena and Saionji, and while Saionji's is a bit complicated and unclear I think, Utena's actually is pretty straightforward I think. Utena want's to be a prince. That's her fantasy. The general virtues she want's to possess are great. Good even. But the specific's seems to involve a kind of rides in and saves the day riding in on a white horse thing, where she's the hero and does for some poor unfortunate girl what her prince did to her.

Saionji's meanwhile, seems to be something of him having a genuine reciprocal relationship with Anthy, with him inhabiting the role of a badboy romantic lead while the two of them have feelings for each other. When, really, he doesn't seem to care for her, or at least the feelings that he has for her are considerably weaker than whatever awkward feelings he has going on for Toga (I'm seriously a little fuzzy here, cause it feels like following his most recent defeat he's rocking some kind of clarity? I don't know how it's gonna work out, but I could sorta see him Returning and upsetting whatever the then status quo is.)

But notably, the big thing between them is their staunch refusal to accept what seems to be really true about their relationship with Anthy.

That the end theme seems to immediately pop up as an answer to Utena's reaction feels...Purposeful.

#revolutionary girl utena #liveblogish #In which I just have to accept that i'm probably gonna be looking at foils everywhere for everything #Things Get Spicy #I should really consider getting images but for right now i refuse.#liveblog

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myvelouri · 5 years

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So I went out briefly, saw a few fireworks, yea I like fireworks actually. They were pretty. It's humid as fuck out here though so I got my trusty beanie. It's always in my pocket. But yeah, no real anything going on. I asked a few friends, but I'm too... I don't know... Out of energy, not physical energy, some kind of energy, I'm too out of it to go drive down to the beach and all that EVEN THOUGH I REALLY FUCKING WANT TO AND MEET MY CUTE ASS FRIEND AND WATCH AMAZING FIREWORKS. lol.

I got work tomorrow anyways. But damn. I blame a lot on depression, but it's truly the driving force in everything I want to do. It takes control, it's fucked. Honestly. I feel possessed by it.

Ugh anyway. A lots happenened recently. Oh yeah my "crush" if you can even call it that, pretty much leaves me on read and is out with other people. She made a post saying if anyone ever needs someone to talk to she's open for anyone. She said she felt down. I messaged her and she left it on read. How messed up. I guess I'm too subhuman to be part of the included "anyone can message me." It sucks. It sucks also because I liked her already and out of nowhere she actually DM'd me, we talked forever. It was going great. Idk what happened. She actually didn't follow me, so like, I don't know if she forgot to or if on purpose. Like duh I noticed because I like her. There's a little more that happened and all but that's got me really upset overall

Then the shit that happened recently.

I just want to be happy. I used to be like, one of the sought after ppl in my family, as in, the really funny one, cute one, everyone's favorite, everyone wanted to be around me, I'd find ways to impress everyone and they'd totally love me. I have a huge family. Relatives. All that. Yeah. But this was all before I had depression. So. After depression, I can't be that person anymore. I used to be so "popular" for lack of a better term. But I was happy because I was able to actually enjoy being stupid, dumb, goofy, clever, mischevious, cute, a smart ass, intelligent, quick. All that. And they all saw me as really talented because I was a really great artist. Guess what? After depression, I don't even draw anymore. I can't. It's so hard to find the enjoyment. It feels like a chore. Just imagine that. Doing something you ACTUALLY FUCKING WANT TO DO feels like a -CHORE.-

Yeah. It's depression. It's not bEiNg sAd AlL tHe tImE. No, it comes with a huge varying detrimental pack of bullshit "side effects"

I used to enjoy playing video games. I WAS a gamer. And I was for some Reas insanely good at videos games, shooters and such. Multiplayer games. Everyone would come to me to beat a level or kick someone's ass. And I did it. Idk how. I actually truly enjoyed it. I remember my brain activity being really high when I was engaged in anything I did. Whereas now I can't even pay attention when I put in the most effort. What a fucking waste. My brain was awesome, such a fucking waste. I feel like depression was bound to happen to me though. I was treated like shit way more than I wasn't in my life.

But yeah I wish I could enjoy games. Sadly I suck at them now. It's awful. My brain freezes up and I'm so slow. I can't play competitively at all. And mind you I played professional with a whole team when I was younger. Its all gone now. Whenever people would watch me play they would get so impressed by my moves, my clutch moments, me taking on multiple people at once when it seemed like I was done for. I made many friends online too, people were so impressed. There was one time when this person was so impressed that I got their account. I was swapping accounts with them for a reason, and I regret that completely. I basically scammed the person that trusted me. I regret that so bad, but I tried to give the account back multiple times, but there was no info for that person. The way it was set up. I can't believe that happened. I feel so bad about that. I just wanted that person that looked up to me to get their account back. It's awful. I can only blame it on being really fucking young and stupid. I was still an impulsive teenager. But goddamn that still makes me feel so so bad. This was so long ago.

Ahh I'm making myself feel terrible.

But I imagine if I still enjoyed playing games, I'd probably be way more active, have more friends. Lmao would I be a twitch bitch? Hahaha. Who knows.

#personal #depression #dumb #regrets

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actualyuuri · 7 years

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hi, sorry if this is a dumb question but, it's revealed that viktor was in love yuuri the whole time in that one episode where it reveals yuuri doesnt remember that one night, and before that they got rings. did they actually get engaged is that what yuuri really meant when he bought those rings ??? and when did they actually start dating?? im a lil confused. especially abt when their relationship turned romantic

Hi anon!!! Not a dumb question at all! All of the things you asked about, I’m afraid, are pretty subjective, but here’s the timeline of Victor and Yuuri’s relationship as I see it. Also, I’d like to note that I’m not going to fill in the gaps (i.e. assume their first kiss was before The Kiss™), I’m just going with what’s canon.

The Victuuri Timeline

PRE - EPISODE 1

Victor is on top of the skating world and has lost inspiration. Yuuri has lost the GPF because of his anxiety and is ashamed of himself.

The Sochi Banquet Scene (Episode 10) - Yuuri dances with Victor and asks him to be his coach. Victor is enamored at first sight because Yuuri is bright and blazing and beautiful. He hears Yuuri’s request and the idea starts as a spark in his mind.

EPISODE 1

Yuuri skates to Victor’s routine, Stammi Vicino (Stay Close to Me) and the triplets record it.

Victor sees the video and decides to be Yuuri’s coach. He does this because he remembers how he’d felt during the banquet and because “he skates like his body is creating music.”

Victor shows up at the onsen, Yuuri essentially rejects him because he’s Shook™.

At this point in the show, we’re working with two types of love that are not the final product. Victor is infatuated with Yuuri, but he knows next to nothing about him. Yuuri, on the other hand, knows everything about Victor’s public persona, but knows nothing about his private persona. They’re in love with the idea of each other.

EPISODES 2-3

Yuri Plisetsky shows up, blah blah blah. They decide to have a Yuri vs. Yuuri competition, and Yuuri decides that if he wins, he wants Victor to remain in Japan as his coach.

This point is an underrated development in their relationship – it’s less of a desperate fanboy moment and more real.

Yuuri is starting to see glimpses of Victor’s personality and the hero-worship dynamic is beginning to be broken down.

Yuuri is assigned the theme of “Eros” (sexual love) and Yuri is assigned “Agape.” They both wanted the opposite.

The fact that Yuuri skates to Eros, ultimately comprehends the routine (although he does so by thinking of pork cutlet bowls, which is character-building but that’s another story), and wins the competition proves one thing: Victor Nikiforov, despite his lack of experience as a coach, manages to bring out the best in him.

They’re no longer strictly in love with the idea of each other. Now, they’re getting to know each other on a deeper level. I would personally say that their relationship is not ‘romantic’ yet, although it’s certainly on that path.

EPISODES 4-5

Victor encourages Yuuri to select the music for his free skate, something that he didn’t have the confidence to do in the past.

This shows that Victor allows Yuuri to feel more confident in his decisions through encouragement and support, and once again proves that Victor brings out the best in him.

During a competition, Victor tells Yuuri to lower the difficulty of his jumps and Yuuri doesn’t listen. This brings into account the theme of surprise in their relationship, something that is addressed pretty often.

Yuuri declares his theme for the season to be love.

This is personally when I would consider their relationship developing into something romantic. Yuuri’s theme isn’t about love for Victor’s public playboy personality, it’s about love for Victor the person, for Victor his friend, for Victor his coach.

Meanwhile, something that is persisting throughout every episode but that is more subtle is the fact that Yuuri is bringing out the best in Victor. You don’t necessarily notice it until more information is given about Victor’s internal state in later episodes, but Yuuri is surprising him, offering him a vicarious love of the ice that he hadn’t known in a long time due to his lack of inspiration.

EPISODES 6-7

Yuuri skates his short program trying to convince everyone that he’s worthy of having Victor Nikiforov as his coach. This is partially because of his own insecurities (he needs to prove it to himself, in a way). This comes back into play later in Yuuri’s character development, but that’s not what this is about.

Victor makes Yuuri cry in the garage. Yuuri’s line about “wanting Victor to have more faith in him than he does in himself” is representative, once again, of Victor having the potential to bring out the best in him.

This scene is mostly character-building for the both of them, but it’s also relationship-building because it’s the first time that Victor has come face to face with the ugly brute that is Yuuri’s anxiety.

They kiss!!!!!!!

I feel like that’s pretty self-explanatory honestly

So yeah, definitely romantic at this point lol.

EPISODES 8-9

Victor returns to Japan because of Makkachin, blah blah Yuuri skates.

The infamous airport reunion scene happens.

The most important aspect of this scene is a small exchange of dialogue. Yuuri says, “Please by my coach until I retire,” and Victor replies with “I wish you’d never retire.”

If that isn’t love I don’t know what is ok?? Pretty self-explanatory line, but I think it also demonstrates that Victor has come to love Yuuri for more than his skating and more than his killer thighs. He’s wholeheartedly in love with every aspect of him, anxiety and all.

EPISODE 10

This episode, which is partially narrated by Victor, gives a lot of insight to his character, and by extension the significance of his meeting with Yuuri at the Sochi GPF Banquet (which I talked about in the Pre-Ep 1 section of this long-winded rant).

Yuuri buys the rings.

He does not intend for them to be engagement rings.

Instead, he buys them as a gift of gratitude for Victor.

Victor declares that the rings are engagement rings and that they’ll marry once Yuuri wins the GPF.

Now, Victor has always been a dramatic character. Also, they’re both complete in love at this point.

Like I said, surprises are a big theme in their relationship, so I think they both pulled off surprises in this episode – Yuuri buying the rings and Victor changing the meaning of the rings.

Yuuri’s shock in regards to Victor saying this isn’t disapproval, it’s surprise and more of a like oh-my-god-what-are-you-doing-I-may-not-win sort of thing.

If you think about it, Victor essentially just said to a table of Yuuri’s competitors, “lol I’ma marry this boy once he kicks all of your butts.” So Yuuri is part shook by that, because he doesn’t want to upset anyone or make them think he’s assuming he’ll win, and partially because…. He’s engaged to the love of his life now?

EPISODES 11-12

The “Let’s End This” scene in the hotel occurs. Victor cries and looks beautiful while doing so.

The significance for their relationship in this scene is that Yuuri recognized the way Victor was watching the ice and assumed that he wanted to go back to skating.

However, he underestimated how much Victor enjoys being his coach (because he is, after all, an unreliable narrator).

They end up deciding that Yuuri will continue to skate, and Victor will be his coach and skate on his own.

They pair skate, and it’s beautiful.

Sorry about this rant anon, I’m sure this isn’t what you wanted hahaha. I hope I explained though when I believe their relationship turned romantic and the meaning of the rings from either of their perspectives.

As for when they started dating, I would say never.

They’re in love, yes, and they’re romantically involved, yes, but the way I see it, their relationship never really was at the “dating” stage. It runs deeper than that because of the way their love developed (from being in love with the idea of each other to being in love with each other).

Their relationship, as opposed to your typical linear relationship development in most shows, started deep. As deep as it could. They didn’t meet and go on a date and get each other’s phone numbers, they started in bad places and brought out the best in each other. It was a natural development, but they were never at the dating stage – they were too invested from the very beginning to do that.

However, like I said at the beginning of this ridiculous post (I’m sorry again for how long this is), these are just my opinions! I’m sure other people interpreted scenes very, very differently, so take this with a grain of salt!

#my finger slipped #anonymous #maddie answers #victuuri #yoi #thumbs up if you saw that i wrote 'the twins' before changing it to 'the triplets'#why do i keep doing this to axel lutz and loop #:(

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szopenhauer · 4 years

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Have you ever used hot wax for sexual purposes? nooo, I don’t get it

Does any part of your body ache right now? yeah, few parts but it’s fine, I’m used to the pain

Have you ever used the phrase “for Pete’s sake?!” maybe once because usually I say for fuck’s sake if at all

Do you enjoy listening to Drake? I don’t listen to Drake

Do you ever try to shake something in order to get it to work again? hahaha yes

Are you afraid of snakes? nah

Are remakes of things better, or the originals? usually originals are better I think

Do you call them hotcakes or pancakes? pancakes, I never heard someone saying hotcakes before :o

Do you prefer cupcakes or muffins? what’s the difference

Have you ever made a fruitcake before? sure

What was the last thing that you made with your own two hands? not sure what was last

When is your favorite decade? 80s?

Is your bed currently unmade? like always

How easy is it to persuade you to do something? but what?

Have you ever been paid for sex? wtf no

Have you ever had a maid in your home before? we don’t have money for that

Do you know how to do different types of braids in hair? just the basic one

When’s the last time you wore a Band-aid? Where and why? recently, my hand because dog bitten me

Have you ever wanted to be a mermaid? noooo

When was the last time you were afraid? Of what? constantly, many things but mostly health related

When do you feel the most safe? never?...

When’s the last time that you did something unsafe? What was it? everything seems unsafe to me now

Have you ever owned a pet that lives in a cage? What is/was it? aquarium only

Do you fold the page you left off on in your book, or do you use a bookmark? bookmark or some replacement like another book, pen or smth like that

What’s the most noticeable thing about your face? *shrug*

Do you pace when you are nervous? it happens

Do you say grace before you eat? Sunday lunch only

When’s the last time you felt out of place? I’m out of place in general

Would you like to explore outer space? no, Earth is more important, we shouldn’t spend so much money on space

Have you ever felt replaced? not only felt, I was truly replaced

When’s the last time that you misplaced something important? I misplace my scissors

Have you ever been chased before? By who/what? not counting playful ones - by drunk people, by an insect, by an dog/cat

Would you like to visit Venice? no way, it’s a scary place

Would you like to play tennis? I would like to try someday

Do you know anyone named Alice? my aunt

Have you ever seen the Aurora Borealis? on a picture on the internet

Have you ever watched Wallace and Gromit? all of them and I love the series

Have you ever seen Ferris Bueller’s Day off? not yet, I need encouragment

How often do you get embarrassed? so often!

How often do you engage in reckless behavior? I’m not risky

Do you enjoy listening to reggae music? not a fan

Have you ever rolled in hay before? that’d be itchy

Would you like a chance to ride in Santa’s sleigh? why not?

Have you ever taken ballet lessons before? How about any other type of dance lessons? not ballet but we all had to attend dance classes in middle school

Have you ever caught a bouquet of flowers at a wedding before? I didn’t want to but I had to dance in a circle and that always makes me uncomfy

How much do you weigh? not enough according to BMI

Do you ever wear a beret? I don’t recall

Do you know how to crochet? How about doing macrame? a bit; nah

Do you have a duvet on your bed? I do

Is crème brulee your favorite dessert? never tried it

Did you obey your parents when you were younger? I should...

What’s your favorite day of the week? definitely not Wednesday or Sunday, maybe Friday or Saturday?

Do you ever just lay around all day? sit

Have you ever felt like you’ve lost your way? I’m lost, confused

Do you ever wish that people would just go away? yeah

Are you starting to go gray? my gf is laughing at me for that, I’ll look like Rogue from Marvel soon

Do you pray? How often? try every evening, I pray at least once a week

What’s the best play you’ve seen before? Krzesiwo when I was a kid

What did you like to play with when you were younger? many things

Would you like to slay dragons? nah

Have you ever experienced a delay of any sort? sure

Have you ever wondered how you could ever repay someone? I wish I could

What did you do today? lots

Would you ever take in a stray animal? I did in the past

Has your airway ever been blocked before? not counting asthma/allergy attacks - one time I inhaled a feather with my mouth while playing with my sister and I couldn’t get it out and I am scared of feathers now a bit

When it’s hot out, do you sleep with blankets anyways? I do indeed

Have you ever felt betrayed? more than once

What’s the last unfortunate thing that happened to you? my life’s unfortunate in general

When is payday? I don’t work, I’m unemployed

Do good moments or bad moments replay through your mind more often? dark scenarios that will happen

How do you feel about public displays of affection? not indo PDA besides holding hands and short hugs

What’s your favorite holiday? New year’s eve because the year is fucking over finally and I don’t have to spend money I don’t have for gifts and there are fireworks that I like

What do you want to be someday? myself but happy/healthy/rich and a good person

What is something that you do everyday? drink water, pee, sit down...

Have you ever won a giveaway? sadly not

How important is foreplay? it’s better than sex

What have you missed most that you haven’t been able to do due to Covid-19? I’m just kind of tired of wearing a mask, washing/cleaning all the stuff I bring back from outside, checking the temperature and freaking out about every minor throat/lung problem that could be covid but besides that? I’m cool - as a spoonie and an introvert my life didn’t change much because of the plague, more because of being in a relationship or getting more ill for examples, the worst thing that happened to me due to the world situation was my hospital delay

Do you personally know anyone who has had Covid-19? priest in my home town

Have you had it? (or think you might have?) I haven’t

What’s the name of your favorite restaurant? (chain or local) most of my fav ones got closed years ago

What is your favorite thing to order when you eat there? depends

Have you still been able to get food from there during Covid-19? been to one pizzeria this month twice to get food for my dad while he was at work but that’s all, not counting french fries I ate in my gf’s apartment once

Are you planning on eating there anytime soon when they reopen? dunno

Have you discovered any good new music during quarantine? of course

What is your favorite Starbucks drink? I don’t go to Starbucks

What was your favorite TV show when you were a kid? do you still ever watch it? animated? Moomins and sadly not but if I wanted to I wouldn’t watch the new series, just oldies

Have you been watching a lot of movies during quarantine? not more than usual/every other year

Do you volunteer anywhere? nah

What is your favorite movie on Netflix? I wish I had netflix :(

Did you relocate due to Covid-19? move out? nope, never ever actually

Do you prefer streaming music or buying it? streaming

Do you use Spotify? yeah

What was the last book you read? Five feet apart that I recommend but watch a movie too!

Do you enjoy doing crafts? not really into DIY

Do you shop on Etsy? I’d love to but can’t

Have you ever sold anything on Etsy? same

Do you play Animal Crossing? I want to in the future

What is/are your pet(s) name(s)? Łasuch

Are there any songs you feel transport you to a world that doesn’t exist? hmm...

What are some popular things that you don’t like/aren’t interested in? I’m not into popular things in general

When was the last time you got a haircut? this summer

How soon are you planning on going back to work? (If you’ve been off) when I get the job

What is an item you own that means a lot to you? most of my stuff

Do you have a favorite t-shirt? I like majority of my T-shirts

How do you plan on celebrating Covid-19 being over, whenever that is? what if it will never fully go away?...

When was the last time you cried listening to a song? What song was it & what made you cry? recently, not sure which was last so can’t tell why

If you have a YouTube account, what do you use it for? save my fav videos but not musical ones anymore as there’s too many, I also added some videos I made but they’re private

How often do you watch interviews with musicians/celebrities? I don’t, in my whole life I saw a bunch of those because I was interested in how couple of them live (interior design)

How often do you read biographies about celebrities? I’ve read less than 5 biographies

Do you enjoy visiting book stores? What section are you typically drawn to? whatever, it’s not like they have what I want, also I’m broke

Which do you feel is worse: using drugs or using alcohol? Why? both equally have bad consequences not only to the one who’s using but also to others around

The last time you went out to eat, who were you with & where did you go? Did you enjoy yourself/the meal? I don’t even remember last time eating out

How would you feel if you had to deal with the police? Would you feel nervous, upset, angry? deal how and why?

Is singing something that you enjoy doing? Do you feel you are a horrible, alright or very good singer? very rarely and I suck

Are you looking forward to Halloween? I don’t celebrate Halloween but some decorations are neat

What was the last song that you listened to on repeat? Goo goo dolls - Iris

Do you like to make playlists? What kinds of playlists do you usually make? I throw all music into one place

Do you like to draw? not as often as a kid

What is your biggest flaw? depends on a perspective

Last time you completed a jigsaw puzzle? last year?

Have you ever been to Warsaw before? more than once

Have you ever seen a bat in person before? from afar

Do you have any cats? used to and don’t want one again

Do you think that you’re fat? I’m underweight yet I look chubby

Describe your favorite hat that you own. can’t choose only one

Does your house have a welcome mat? I’d like one that says smth like GO AWAY

Are there any rats roaming around where you live? nah

Have you ever played Mortal Kombat before? watched a movie

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