my doctor literally told me i had way more platelets than normal and i was like huh thats weird. anyway time to deal with my weekly nosebleed

the hell is mystreet season 6??

(warning, long post ahead)

ok so before i start this

1) ive never posted shiiiit on tumblr before so watch me suffer, im just here to talk about stuff that my friends who dont know anything about aphmau have to listen to me rant about for hours on end

2) i havent seen mystreet in like years (except season 3, i watch that frequently since im laurance and shadow knight deprived) so please bear with me because i might be completely wrong on this lol. it’s just like, pointing out things i remember

3) im sure someones already talked about this but who cares

4) im gonna do this stupid thing where i just explain myself a bit at first, if you dont want to read that just skip to the part where you see “the actual thingy:” in bold and italics 

5) mild disclaimer; i am completely aware that jessica is not a professional writer. i know that she did her best to appeal to her fans, and honestly, respect for that. while this post will come off as aggressive and probably look like hate, that’s not my intention in the slightest. it’s just... intense criticism. im sure y’all probably already know that, but yeah, just stating that anyways. i do believe that jess is doing her best, and in no way do i want to dismiss any hard work she’s done. that being said; prepare for a very strongly opinionated post.

haha watch there be 10000+ typos in this making me look like a complete dumbass

ok here we go 

one of the main reasons i stopped watching aphmau back in 2017 was the mess that was season 4. like, in the first few episodes of the emerald secret, i thought “woah!! this is kinda cool, im a sucker for mystery!” because of course i was, it was something new and something exciting. the only problem i had with it at the time was kim, but that’s just because i always found her annoying and out of place. i just didn’t understand why garroth dragged her along and honestly i still don’t to this day BUT, moving on.

anyways, as the season progressed, 13 year old me was of course just “:0!!” the entire time--that is, up until the reveal of the main villain. i remember watching the episode, seeing the reveal of ein, and then stopping. like, just for a quick break, but i was still just overwhelmingly disappointed. like, and this was the time when pdh was airing and ein just got made alpha (i think?) and i had really really liked eins character in pdh. either way, that really sucked and actually opened my eyes to a lot of things.

one of the main things bein’ the fact that this was supposed to be a slice of life kinda series that decided to take a turn to a more edgy kinda approach. which, i guess i regularly wouldnt mind? but seeing as mcd was kinda bein neglected at the time it just didnt sit right with me. BUT WHATEVER, point is i stopped watching mystreet all together at the end of season 4.

like, a whole year later my brother tells me that shit’s getting intense in season 5 + 6 of mystreet, and my brilliant self decided to give it a shot--but i refused to watch all of season 5, so i only stepped in when ein made an appearance. so whenever that was, that’s where i picked up because i didnt care enough to see 

and y’know--i honestly didn’t hate it at first. in fact, i found it oddly cool. it wasn’t enough to get me into aphmau again, but it was enough to where i was intrigued. i dont know why, but i never watched the finale, so i didnt see the ending until just a few weeks ago--but back then, i thought it was neat. looking back on it however... im just so confused. 

side note: only got back into aphmau this time around because of mcd. mainly because like, i adore the first season and the first half of the second season. and being nearly 18 now, im a lot more appreciative of plot and well-written characters n junk. 

the actual thingy:

ok back on track. imma stop spilling out my story of how i got back into aphmau, and lets just skip to what rewatching mcd made me realize of season 6′s plot and shit:

-emmalyn. how the fuck does ghost even remotely exist? if she’s emmalyn as claimed, then why have we already seen emmalyn in the mystreet universe alive? look i get that creators can do whatever they want with their stories but at the same time please provide some sort of explanation good god. and maybe they did and i just havent seen it, so if there is one--let me know. but until that day imma just sit here confused as fuck

-ok so imma just be real, the whole ‘ultima’ thing is just... not great. in my opinion, anyways. like... i saw someone mention this in another post, but if this ultima stuff was like, a really big deal, why isnt it mentioned in mcd? though i suppose since its a curse of sorts, it could be later on past the time period in which mcd takes place--but even then, how did it manage to make its way into aaron’s family bloodline? 

-WHY IS EVERYONE AT STARLIGHT ITS JUST SO CONVINIENT like what happened to this place being the most expensive shit on the planet or whatever, and how the gang happens to run into like, the werewolf trio and blaze and kai and guy and nate all of these people like god damn life doesnt WORK LIKE THAT 

-im sorry but turning people into relics? thats... thats the best you could come up with? plus, like, how does that even work? in mcd it’s established that relics are separate entitles that choose their wielder, based on a ‘personal’ connection (being a descendent of a previous wielder) or if they’re a good match personality and (i think?) moral wise. so the whole turning-people-into-relics doesnt make much sense to be honest. 

-irene really over here using her god powers to only keep her friends alive like god damn not a great god if you ask me 

-can i talk about how incredibly predictable aphmaus death was? like i just kinda sat there waiting for it to happen and when it did i literally went “haha! wonder when she’ll be revived” because god forbid we actually kill off characters 

-when aphmau + demon warlock fought in the irene dimension there was no passage of time whatsoever in the real world whiiiiiiiiich really bothers me because they fought in there for at least a few minutes

-speaking of aphmau and the demon warlocks fight does it bother anyone else that it had to be aaron who took over the fight?? like we get it hes the big protector blah blah blah but god damn it wouldve been cooler if aphmau had fought this battle as her. aaron fighting this battle was so underwhelming

-...love. like, thats the only thing thats needed to break out of a forever potion? love? LIKE YEAH, GOOD GUYS GOTTA WIN SOMEHOW, but its just so cliche and overdoneeee

-oh yeah and also when travis went bonkers and became the demon warlock or whatever, why’d he only take over katelyn and garroth?? like, zane had been influenced by the potions in the past as well? DONT GET ME WRONG--i do love some good brother edge, but uh, the demon warlock was just bein kinda a dumbass by not possessing zane too just sayin’

-can aaron please go to fucking jail for mass murder now like holy shit, he just got sent home on a fuckin boat. also why did blaze forgive him for killing him thats not even remotely realistic. then again, nothing in mystreet has ever been realistic when it comes to characters and motives and personalities, (cough katelyn being actually abusive and travis being an actual pervert) but yknow whatever

-katelyn and kawaii chan literally added nothing to the plot whatsoever. like lets be real, katelyn lost her personality the moment season 5 started and kawaii chan just kinda sits there :I

-ok im sorry this was bound to come up but cmon guys imagine laurances potential if he was in season 6 like god damn this is beyond maddening. AND YOU KNOW WHAT WOULD HAVE BEEN A REALLY REALLY COOL PARRALLEL?? IF IT WAS LAURANCE WHO SNAPPED GARROTH OUT OF HIS MIND CONTROL THING, because it would mimic laurance’s speech to get garroth to snap out of his rage in season 1, episode 100 of minecraft diaries. like how fuckin rad would that have been? missed opportunity 

-also?? why does kim/ghost know magicks?? like, if i remember correctly, emmalyn is a scholar--not someone who knew magicks. i mean, i guess research? study?? but its been established that knowing how magicks works =/= being able to use magicks. i dunno, just doesnt seem right i guess. maybe its explained, i wouldnt know (yes i know that makes me look like a dick leave me alone)

-melissa should have stayed dead. LIKE, NO, ITS NOT AS SIMPLE AS “haha it takes more than a few bullets to kill me”??? look ive got nothing wrong with melissa (cough lie cough) but yknow it would have just been cool a character... stay dead? for once? its just too fuckin cliche that shes alive god damn

-can i also just say the only good thing that came out of season 6 was travis’ dads sacrifice like damn that made me actually sad

-howww was lucinda turned into a relic. or yknow, anyone else? like im sure they explain it better in the actual show i just dont remember, but its just that easy? turning anyone into a relic? granted, a normal person wouldnt be able to produce a good relic, but idk man. IM JUST SAYING; that the only really powerful relics that aphmau should have been able to wield is the one that aaron + zane produced because shad relic and esmund relic moment. lucinda isnt even like, connected to a divine warrior. ALSO, another point, if its seriously that powerful of a relic getting one from just a magic user like lucinda, why go through the trouble? i mean i guess ofc youd want the “all powerful” one that the ultima produces but i mean damn whats the point

-ok this is just going to bother me but in one of the episodes (i think might have been in season 5 actually) where that like, guardian dude was chasing aphmau and zane and at one point they split up and the dude just chuckles at zane diverting paths and goes under his breath “youre not the important one here”, suggesting that aphmau somehow is? first of all, id argue that any ro’meave is significantly more important than aphmau was, especially not knowing much about her other than that shes with aaron. i might be missing some bits an pieces, but if i was that dude id forget about aphmau and go after zane 

-killing off derek for shock factor sucked, and i know the moment was supposed to be really sad because like “oh :( aarons dad is sacrificing himself for his son” but lets be real dereks still was a shitty father and i dont think his reasons for doing what he did was very good at all

-less about plot or more like: why the absolute fuck did the gang bring kim along instead of, oh i dont know, a life-long friend? like, laurance or dante maybe?? im sure its explained, i never saw aphmaus year or most of season 5, but god DAMN id hate to be apart of this friend group AND GOD LIKE, imagine reconnecting with an old friend who ends up getting closer to your best friends and taking priority in their lives over you (cough laurance) like god damn lol

-im just going to preface this one with: i dont remember everything that’s happened, so if im wrong i apologize in advance--but (you actually can correct me if im wrong and please do) didnt like, irene reincarnate her friends in order to give them better lives? I DONT KNOW IF THIS IS TRUE, ITS JUST WHAT I REMEMBER--however, if im correct, then:

a. why the hell would she bring back someone like zane, or gene, or ivy, etc.

b. why the hell do they all have the same exact names? first and last? again, im aware that the whole mystreet+mcd tie wasn’t originally supposed to be there, but i dont think that means such a coincidence can be excused? its just a bit much if you ask me.

c. why the hell is the fact that (as much as i literally hate this) aaron is a decedent of shad being ignored? like, you’d think that something like this would be something thats actually important, or something the demon warlock couldve taken advantage of. or are we completely erasing every other connections to divine warriors besides aphmau + irene? because even if irene did reincarnate them or do whatever it is she did, does she even have the power to sever the connections between them and their ancestors? my guess is, no.

d. speaking of irene why on earth was aphmau able to talk to/see irene, they’re literally the same person are they not? did she like, fuckin reincarnate herself without actually doing it?? BUT--i will give it to them, the demon warlock did refer to aphmau as something along the lines of being “one of the 3 parts of her broken soul” or something like that. however, my point still remains. also what are the other two did i miss that or is it never explained

now; if irene in fact did not ‘reincarnate’ her friends then please ignore that little bit right there :)

but yes, those are a few of the problems i have with season 6 off the top of my head. i would go into like, season 4 and 5 more as well, but i honestly didnt feel like it. at some point i might go into other things, like how important laurance could have been to the plot of these later seasons, or HELL, even dante. i might also go into what could have made season 4, 5, and 6 actually good--maybe... a rewrite? perhaps? but im getting too far ahead of myself, so i just leave you with this for now.

and i know that as soon as i post this 15 more things are just going to pop into my head BUT im going to try and not edit this post because why stress myself with that even more

anyways thank you for coming to my tedtalk 

Not Him

Thank you @tindomrl​ for nagging my lazy butt to write this.

here for ao3. here for fanfiction.net

everlark.

I do not own any of these characters:)

***

“No, not him. Not fucking Peeta Mellark. He can’t be here.” I whisper to Annie while smoothing down my blazer and dress pants.

Peeta Mellark. The epitome to my existence. I am content, I have a steady boyfriend and a soon to be great job. He can’t be here to ruin it.

It all started on a balmy, summer day in 2nd grade. He pushed me off those darned yellow swings causing painful scrapes to appear on my knees and rough mulch to tangle in my hair. We grew up together in Panem, a small town in Oregon. I always liked him even though we never talked. And then that fucker pushed me off the swings. I know what you are thinking, “Katniss you were a little girl get over it”. There were other instances. In middle school, he won the award of having the most attendance which I was second to by 1 singular day. Darned flu. Or in Sophomore year when he spilled punch all over my dress at Homecoming on purpose. It gets even better, though. I was Valedictorian for our Senior Class and guess what he did when he found out. He stole my cap and gown. I’m not shitting you. He did and I will never forget it. This is why I hate Peeta Mellark. He’s a stickup, selfish prick and I, Katniss Everdeen, will never forgive him.

“Katniss, I’m sure he just works here,”she said reassuringly.“I doubt he’s here for the interview”.

“I hope so,” I mumbled under my breath.

My attention is focused on the man who had just come out of an office. No way. No fuckin’ way. How was I supposed to know that the very company I wanted a job at, was CEO’d by none other than Peeta Mellark. He looks around the room and locks eyes with me before saying,“Thank you all for coming today. As you are aware I am in need of a new secretary because my past employee is on maternity leave. Good luck!”

And with that Peeta Mellark walks back into his office, and calls the first interviewee in.

It seems that 2 hours pass until I am called in. I wipe my sweaty palms on my pants and take a deep breath. Why am I so nervous? What if he remembers me? Oh god. What if he brings it-

“Ms. Everdeen, I presume?”he asks cutting into my thoughts.

“Yes that is correct,”I respond while shaking his warm, calloused hand.

I briefly look up and lock eyes with him. Oh, those blue eyes and floppy curls. How did I ever hate this man. His past slender teenage figure has evened out, shown through the broad shoulders and muscular arms that make up his physique. He is hot. No not just hot, beautiful. Katniss, snap out of it. You have a boyfriend for God sakes. You loathe him.

“Wait...Katniss?”Peeta inquires with a glowing look on his face.

I pause, thinking of how to go about this. Do I pretend not to know him. This could cost me a job. Ah, what do I do?

“Peeta. It’s so good to see you again. How has life been treating you?”

“It’s been what, 7 years? Wow. Everything is going well for me. At least pertaining to the business. My love life is nonexistent and-well, I should probably stop before I get into it. “Peeta stared deeply into my eyes before glancing at his desk,”Anyway, why do you want to work at Mellark Enterprises?”

“My sister, Prim, is in medical school and I want to help her with student loan. Not only that but I need to pay my rent and pay bills and-”

“Ms. Everdeen, Katniss, calm down. It’s ok.” he says while reaching towards my hand and holding it.“Ignoring all the bills to be paid and debts to pay off, why do you really want to work here, Katniss?”

I look at our joined hands and quickly unclasp them, moving my hand to rest on top of my thigh. I can still feel the warmth from his large one. “Honestly, I didn’t even know this was your company. I just want a job and thought that being a secretary was a great way to start.”

Peeta peered at me with those baby blue eyes causing me to squirm in my seat. “Thank you, Katniss. I will go over your resume and get back to you if you get the position.”

As I embarked on the journey from the chair to the door, I heard Peeta say something the made my heart stop, “I look forward to seeing you soon, Ms. Everdeen.” He gave me a crooked grin causing butterflies to erupt in my stomach. Crap. What is he doing to me.

And with that I left the room.

***

Annie calls me later that afternoon and I recall all that had happened today.

“I can’t believe it was him. Why him? Of all the 7 billion people on this earth he could be my boss.”

“I mean, Katniss, you don’t have to take the job when you get it.”

“If I get it and I need this job, though. No one else is hiring.”I searched for days but not a single business needed another employee. I felt a spark of hope when I saw the neon pink flyer stating a secretary position at Mellark Enterprises was available, that is, until him.

“Well, I don’t know what to tell you Katniss. He can’t be that bad. When you get the job just take it. I don’t think you'll regret it,” Annie instructed me.

With a groan, I told Annie bye and hung up.

I hope I don’t regret this.

Behind me, I hear the sound of the door to the apartment opening. Thank goodness Gale was home.

“Hey Catnip,” Gale greets me with a peck while taking off his tie.

“Hey,” I respond unenthusiastically,”How was your day?”

“Great, actually. You know the new intern I was telling you about?”

“Yeah. Madge?”

“Yup. God, she's great, Katniss. I’m so glad I snatched her up before anyone else could get their claws in her.”

“That’s great, babe,” I say while peering at him skeptically. He has shown more and more interest in her since, well, 2 months ago. I trust Gale. Yeah we have our spats and our fiery personalities don’t exactly fit perfectly but I couldn't live without him. He’s my rock. He has been since we were 10 and met in the woods of all places. Both our dads liked to hunt so we always went along and one day we bumped into each other, literally.

I’ve noticed that Gale and I seem to be distancing ourselves form each other. Not purposefully, but we don’t have that connection we used to have. Ugh, just another thing to add to my overflowing plate. There was time when we would kiss passionately until we were exhausted and would go on dates almost every night but times have changed. Is it possible to fall out of love with someone because if it is, I am with Gale. Now, don’t take that the wrong way. I’m not breaking up with him. It’s relieving to have someone to talk to but I just don’t feel what I used to. Maybe I am going crazy.

“Hey, babe?” Gale called out to me from the living room bringing my thoughts back to reality.

“Yeah,”I responded hoping he wanted more from me than to bring him dinner.

“Can you get me some milk?”

“Fine,” I unwillingly grumbled back. When I brought it to him he had a dismissive attitude towards me and added on to what he previously said.

“I have a convention for work so I won’t be home over the weekend.”

“Ok, that’s great. I’ll just stay with Annie.” I didn’t want to be alone.

“Sounds good, Catnip.”

He would be the death of me.

***

A week or two goes by with no word from Peeta about the job. I might as well admit defeat. Yet again, Peeta frickin Mellark decides to ruin my life.

After grabbing my yoga mat and putting on leggings and a t-shirt, I go meet up with Annie for our twice a week zen class. The classic “Downward Dog” and “Balasana” always calm me down.

Afterwards, we hit a coffee shop where Annie’s fiancé, Finnick, waits.

“Hey, hon,” Annie tells him lovingly. “Aw, you got me my favorite. Thanks.” She then proceeds to give him a languid kiss causing me to turn away.

Sometimes I wish Gale and I were more like Annie and Finnick. Our kisses aren’t “languid” and he always get me coffee which I hate. I know, I know I could just break up with him but I don’t want to lose his company or friendship. Woe is me.

“So, Finnick, what have you been up to?” I asked him.

“Oh, you know, getting drunk, killing mobsters, giving my beautiful fiancé the best of everything,” Finnick replies, giving Annie doe eyes. “I forgot to tell you, I invited a friend to join us so I hope that's ok.”

“Thats fi-,”I stop myself.

Peeta Mellark, the very same Peeta Mellark who could be my boss, was walking towards the table.

In my trashy t-shirt and ratty leggings with sweaty hair sticking to my forehead I knew I looked awful.

*sniff sniff* And smelled awful.

Shit.

I glare at Finnick and scowl. I hope he feels the pain I’m experiencing.

“Katniss, hey!” Peeta made no comment towards my outfit or smell so that’s a good sign.

I cleared my throat before saying,”Hello, Peeta.”

My cheeks were burning up and I could tell they were a dark pink from embarrassment. He set a drink in front of me. If it’s coffee I swear to god I’ll-

“I didn’t know what you liked so I guessed. Is hot chocolate ok?” he commented shyly.

“Um, yeah it's perfect,”I told him. “So, you know Finnick?”

“We go way back. Freshman year of college we were roommates in those crusty, dilapidated dorms. He was the one who took, no dragged me to parties and set me up on dates. I don’t know where I’d be without him.”

“Hopefully dead,” I grumbled underneath my breath.

Peeta gave me a peculiar look before turning away. So what if he heard me. I doubt I got the job and I loathe him anyway.

Annie gives me a sympathetic glance before telling the table that she and Finnick have to leave for their “couples class”.

I hope she and Finnick die a fiery death. I can’t leave, that would be rude, but at the same time I can’t sit here for another hour small talking to Peeta fuckin’ Mellark. Suck it up, buttercup.

“Oh, Katniss, this is the perfect opportunity to tell you that you got the job!” Peeta declared to me while grinning. Why is he grinning? He’s probably conniving plans on how to torture me. Wouldn't be surprised. “That is, if you will accept.”

I had no other option but to say yes.

“Ok, that's awesome. I’ll take it.”

Those 6 words, I would soon learn, would change my life forever.

***

Waking up and realizing you have a steady job and will be able to pay rent should cause a person to leap for joy. I can’t. Not when the job is at Mellark Enterprises. God, today will be awful.

As soon as I arrive to the 8th floor, Peeta is there, welcoming me. He shows me around from the break room to his office, and finally my desk. Which I forgot to mention is about 10 feet from his. Crap.

I’m in deep shit.

“I’m looking forward to working with you, Katniss,” Peeta comments, his eyes soft and grin, again, crooked. His floppy blonde, curly hair is unruly and of course he rolled his button up sleeves up to his elbows causing his pale smooth skin and muscular arms to show. I felt something move south, not caused by my actual boyfriend, and I wanted to moan. Oh, to push him against his desk and him to take me right then and then. To feel his strong arms wrapped around me and his tongue twirling with mine. That’s hot. Wait, what? What is this man doing to me?

“M...Me too,” I stumble over my words still hypnotized by his beauty.

I notice that Peeta was staring off into the distance and has a slight smirk on his face. Hm, I wonder what he’s thinking about. He shakes himself out of it and slams his office door behind him.

I go about my first day at Mellark Enterprises as secretary to the one and only Peeta Mellark. Nothing strange or abnormal happens. I go home, as usual. Gale is passive aggressive, as usual. But my mind is swirling with sinful thoughts of Peeta. Why him? Why does my body react to him this way. My mind loathes him but my heart...I just don't know what to do. He’s the guy that taunted me for years and is now acting like we have been best friends for decades. My emotions can’t seem to stay in check when I’m around him. I’m so conflicted and unsure of what to do.

The next day, after a long night of dreams I should not be having, I quickly make my way to work.

“Mellark Enterprises, this is Katniss Everdeen speaking. How may I help you?”

“Yes, I am his secretary.”

“Yes I will leave him with your number ma’am.”

“Ok, bye.”

Ugh, ew. I do not need Peeta’s booty calls asking me about him. What he does is his business. Right? I wouldn't want to be one. No, no way.

His lips on mine, hands roaming.

Me moaning. Lips caressing every part of my neck.

Blonde curls falling on his face. Calloused hands unwinding my braid, kissing each strand.

Snap. Out. Of. It.

He’s your boss, my god, Katniss.

After the weird phone call this morning, I avoided Peeta as much as a secretary could do (not well) and quickly scurried home. I told Annie that I had a bad day and need some alone time which she understood.

I decided to make a detour before going home and bought a bottle of Pinot Grigio from the local supermarket because boy did I need it. I unlocked the door and opened it into my apartment. Walking to the kitchen, I set the white wine on the counter and ransacked the refrigerator looking for some carbs. The door to the bedroom was closed, that’s odd. I shrugged my shoulders and sat on the couch, eating pasta and drinking some cheap wine. My ideal night. after about an hour of this, I heard a voice...2 voices to be exact coming from the bedroom. I glanced at the front door-wait those aren't my shoes, or jacket. Opening the bedroom door slowly, with a pan because there could be a murderer in my apartment, I saw what I hadn’t expected to see at all.

“GALE! Who the fuck is that.”

“Katniss, I can explain.” he said hurriedly.

“Who is she?” the blond bimbo said.

“Madge, she’s nobody,” he told her trying to calm her down.

“Wait, Madge. As in your intern Madge?” I said, disgusted with Gale. “How dare you Gale. Damn you. Leave and NEVER come back.”

“Katniss, please, baby, I can explain.”

“I said LEAVE. You too, Madge,” I spit out.

He quickly gathered his clothes and scurried out the door, taking Madge with him. I just can’t believe he would do that. Why? I know things haven't been the best lately, but to cheat on me?

I could barely stand so I sank to the floor and bawled, trying to pick up the pieces of my broken life.

hp update: its been a long time, boys. ud think that with this plague outbreak id have more time for shitty phone games, and ud be right! however, the time i normally might use to make tumblr posts has been taken up by reading lotr orc fanfiction non-stop for at least 1 full month. id still be in the thick of that obsession even now if only the fics would update. that is how i find you today folks, for the first time in many weeks i am staring at a screen with nothing to do. so come with me friends, theres no better way to fill the soulless void we are all in than reading a nice long tumbler post. 

disclaimer, first of all, a lot has happened, i prefer to keep these updates as plot spoiler free as possible but do to extenuating circumstances i feel like it is necessary to say, [SPOILER SPOILER SPOILER SPOILER BELOW]

that rowan fucking died,

i wont say exactly how, but i will say that her death was animated as were animations of myself and a few others reacting to our friend fresh corpse. obviously meant to be serious moments but the animations made it seem almost comical. 

i saw at least one post going around right after this update that was like ‘how could the game devs do this to us..... how could they hate rowan so.... this is punishment from on high’ and its like.... u guys do know what a story is right? the events of  a story are not typically done to punish less faithful fans, im pretty sure they were planning to kill rowan off from the beginning. this isnt disney im pretty sure the writers are not writing each chapter the night before its released by popular vote. 

that little “are we drifting away..?” scene with rowan makes more sense now. there was a bit in one of the scenes where the kids all reminisce on rowans life and the mc talks about it being the last real one on one time they had with rowan. a nice bitter sweet moment. i dont hate this turn of events. its a good reminder that actions have consequences and we are way past they days of “should i wear a hat or scarf?” its YA time now. 

i did manage to take 1 screenshot from this time, i had commented that before that when rowan said she didnt have many friedns that barnaby seemed to be hanging out with her without be there as a friend buffer and here was his reaction to her death:

;_;

the funniest part in all of this however, was of course cedericks reaction to rowans death “but she was so young....” LOL fuckin RIP.

lets see... what else.... i forget a lot of what happened but i think there was a time sensitive quidditch event in there somewhere? if so i  dont remember it. what i do remember of the quidditch pals is that im gonna play beater now, skye is being weird and cagey about it, andre is involved.... the others are there.....

sidenote, i love the shitty b characters they throw in to be like yes you know this person but no they are not cool enough for u to even think about befriending. the first one of those is face paint kid, and now we have another, who is a former beater girl with horrible bangs named bean who didnt go to any classes for a whole season so she could just play ball 24/7 and got kicked off the team.  this is a character who only exists to provide an explanation as to why there would be a beater position open but i love them on principle. 

right now im in the midst of another time sensitive event, this one is a bother-your-brother-at-work-day event where recent hogwarts graduate bill weasley is bullied by myself and his younger brother charlie into letting us go with him on one of his curse breaking jobs. 

so for those unfamiliar, bill works for the magical bank of england.... and his job seems to be “retrieving treasure” for said bank. in the books, there is a bit where he takes his family on one of his trips to egypt, where his job seemed to have been tomb plundering indiana jones style for the posterity of the english bank :X. i wont explain here why thats bad but its bad. 

the game devs however in this instance, at least SEEM to be doing what jkr couldnt do by attempting to salvage what is left of gringotts bank and form it into not a super shitty implications factory run by horrible jewish caricatures. bills mission is to retrieve a goblin made artifact that was taken by dragons, so no going to foreign countries to steal things from other people! only going to a dragon reserve to rifle through animal nests. they even appear to be providing us with a likable goblin character, egad!  

my hope for this event is that we get a plotline about how maybe, goblins arent shifty human haters for no reason, and in fact they hate magic humans for very understandable reasons, like being forced to go into hiding with the rest of the magical world even though only the humans wanted to do that, and maybe despite running the bank in england they still dont have a lot of political sway in the world of wizards and witches, and have to rely on the faith that said wizards and witches wont fuck them over at every turn, even as they see how they treat other non-humans, such as house elves, which they desperately dont want to end up like. and maybe they DONT only care about gold... maybe thats a human stereotype based on the fact that theres a long history of humans not respecting goblin ownership customs.... which i could get into..... but i wont.... i just....... very badly dont want them to suck ;__________;

i know i said its ok to still like a piece of media as long as you recognize the problems with it, and i do, but once this game is done im gonna stop hp posting all together. ive been feeling more and more uncomfortable making these posts lately.  

GENERAL GAME NOTES; theres been some new layout changes and such. 

most notably the stairs screen has been changed from a bulleted list of all locations to a screen with tiles picturing an image of each location along with the name + icons of all classes at each place. there is one additional location that is new and yet to be unlocked, and the dragon reservation is appearing temporarily as its own tile as well. i prefer this method of getting in and out of a temporary location to how they did it with car during the last christmas special. the stairs icon also now stays in the corner when you scroll through locations, allowing you to open the stairs menu without scrolling all the way back to the left. 

they also moved a few of the buttons down into the lower left corner rather than the left side & combined the story button and sidequest button. they added a little camera button as well, just like in the dormitory, that makes all the icons in a location disappear and look better for screenshots. 

the daily special add offer thing now has its own button in the top right corner of the screen, and idk if i mentioned it before but now there are daily challenges that appear in the sidequest screen that offer small rewards for completing 3 tasks per day + a better one if u get all 3. the prizes are things like 4 energy, 75 coins, 3 monster food. the better rewards are usually either more coins, 8 energy, 3 gems, or 1 notebook. i think that it does all the different color notebooks but i cant remember for sure if i ever saw the gold one up as a reward. i like this addition in any case. if you dont pick up ur reward by the end of the day, the next time u log on it will force u to stop and accept them, and if one of the rewards is energy and ur energy bar is full, it does not seem to stack beyond the bar so watch out.

 the character stats page is now more zoomed out so you can see your full character instead of just from the waist up. no change to the leaderboard. rowans face in the friendship roster is now a still black and white image that says ur friend may be gone but friendship is forever u-u. 

rowan has been removed from all classes. in the classes where the minigames involved her, those minigames have passed the mantle onto other friends in the class. in potions that person is now liz helping u find stuff off the shelves and in tranfiguration that person is badeea. bless these girls for helping mc get through it. touched my heart. 

theres been a few fun little “i know u have more free time now so uhhhh have some energy” prizes like they do sometimes when they dont update on schedule so thats been nice. just a few days ago they gifted us 3 gold notebooks the same way. :O. 

theres also been a few instances of a energy happy hour where for a limited time energy takes less time to refresh. normally it takes 4 mins for 1 energy to do this but during happy hour its like 2:30 mins. :U its all very interesting.

and that will have to do it for tonight my friends, ill do a post for the dragon event when its done because i do like it so far and i do like getting to bully bill with charlie. 

until next time, remember.......

my baby’s a public menace {Ben Hardy/Reader/Roger Taylor}

Four Iconic Moments The Press Had A Fucking Field Day With

A/N: 2670 words. So this time we’ve got Modern Times with 70s!Roger pulled forwards in time. Don’t think too hard about how it works it just does.

1. It Becomes Official

The moment they call Ben’s name at the BAFTAs, to receive the award for Lead Actor in a Television Series, you feel like the whole world is coming to a stand still, and Ben’s rising, disbelief written all over his face. 

“That’s me.” He says, quietly, as the applause has already begun, and then Roger’s on his feet, beaming, and he wraps his arms around Ben, pashing him directly in front of the camera that was catching every moment, and Ben kisses him back easily, before turning to you, eyes bright, and he pulls you to your feet, giving you a kiss as well.

“Congratulations, babe.” You murmur, and he’s so fucking ecstatic when he pulls back, and heads into the aisle, heading towards the stage. You slide into his seat with ease, lacing your fingers with Roger’s where he’s bouncing with energy and beaming with pride. 

“He fuckin’ won.” Roger laughs with a little disbelief, and you turn to each other, both absolutely radiating with pride and adoration.

“Our boy did it.” You giggle, and Roger’s gaze dips to your lips for a moment before he looks back up, a new spark in his eyes that you knew all too well.

“I can’t wait ‘til we all get home.” He dropped his voice low, and you could feel yourself growing a little flustered at the suggestion.

“Keep it in your pants, dear,” you nudged him, and he barked out a laugh, giving you a wink before he turned to where Ben was finally walking across the stage. You, however, felt your heart stop in your chest, “he kissed us on camera.”

“Well, I kissed him,” Roger mused, his thumb rubbing against the side of your hand, “couldn’t help myself.” He admitted, still beaming as Ben was handed his award, expression bright and a little disbelieving as he leaned into the microphone.

“I think I just won a BAFTA and outed myself in the same minute, so that’s going to be hard to beat next year.” Is the opening line of his speech, and the audience titters with polite laughter, while you and Roger are hiding your snorts. “I actually had to email the organisational committee to ask them to let me bring more than one plus one, I’m glad to see that it wasn’t in vain.” He laughs; he goes on to thank the crew of the show he worked on, the other cast members, his family, and he looks for you and Roger in the audience, pointing the award at you. “And for Rog and Y/N, of course; the weirdest and best thing to happen to me in a long time.”

“Do you think he knows how much we wanna suck his dick?” You lean over to Roger, whispering under your breath, amused smile on your lips at you look up at your boyfriend grinning on stage.

“Of course he does, look at that smile.” Roger responds with a low chuckle as Ben leaves stage, heading back towards you. When he gets back to his seat, you move back to your own seat, resting your head on his shoulder when he sits down.

“We’re so proud of you, baby.” You tell him softly as they’re beginning the next segment on stage, and Ben reaches out with his free hand to rest it on your thigh, giving you a squeeze.

“I know, love.”

2. Roger Throws Half A Chicken At A Paparazzi

“Do you think we should go inside?” You ask, voice low as you catch sight of a man in a baseball cap and dark glasses covertly trying to take photos of you three. It was a nice evening, you, Roger, and Ben had been enjoying a meal outside at an upscale restaurant, the three of you draped on a two person outdoor lounge, your entrees having just been cleared up. Both you and Ben are on your phones, and Roger’s between the two of you, nose buried in the paper.

“Why?” Ben asks, not looking up from his phone, and you shift a little uncomfortably, giving the man trying to look like he’s not taking photos.

“Hey, dude, can you just leave us alone? We just wanna get dinner.” You call to the man, and he stands, a little flustered.

“So it’s true, you’re really dating both of them?” He calls back, stashing his phone in his pocket, pulling out a little recording device; the asshole came prepared.

“No, we’re just really good friends who make out at the BAFTAs.” Roger rolls his eyes, folding up the paper, and throwing the paper onto the table in front of him.

“No need to get snarky, mate, I just think it’s weird that somebody like her would get on so well with-” He’s cut off just as a kind and beleagured waitress puts down what looks like half a roast chicken surrounded by salad onto the table.

“Fuck off, alright?” Ben snaps at the man, clearly irritated, sitting up straighter, giving the waitress an apologetic smile as she leaves in a hurry.

“The hell do you mean ‘someone like her’?!” Roger growls, and you actually have to put a hand on his chest where he’s leaning forward, as if getting ready to throw himself at the reporter.

“I- do you wanna address the rumours then, Y/N about-” The man starts, but Roger cuts him off with a snarl.

“If this bastard brings up those fuckin’ gold digger accusations, I’m gonna start throwing things.” He warns, and not a moment later, the man brings up the very words Roger had told him not to. You’re just heaving a heavy sigh, used to being hounded by the gossip magazines, though you try not to pay them any mind.

“I could shout how much I love you from the rooftops and these assholes would still think this is some sort of weird, sugar daddy situation.” Ben turns to you, his voice low as he gives you a long suffering smile. You lean in across the empty space that Roger had just vacated to give him a kiss, before turning to where Roger was wielding his roast chicken like a grenade, lobbing it at the reporter, yelling about how he’s ‘sick and tired of hearing people talk shit about his girlfriend; she’s got more kindness and talent in one tit than the paparazzi has in his whole body’. 

“We should probably get him before he does any real damage.” Ben muses, to which you agree. The two of you move to collect your rogue boyfriend as he continues to yell and squirm.

“Baby, baby please calm down; you’ve made a scene, you’ve thrown a chicken, you’ve mentioned my tits, we can have dinner at home.” You try to placate him, your arm tucked in his as Ben’s got an arm around his shoulders, the two of you guiding him from the restaurant.

“Just makes me so bloody mad.” Roger growls his hands on your hips where you’ve got your arms around his waist as Ben pays for your half finished meals. “It’s twenty eighteen, you’d think dickheads would learn to grow up.” He huffed.

“I know, baby.” You muse, bringing him in for a kiss to distract him, hoping to let his anger simmer down a little as you two stand in the parking lot. 

“I just love you is all, people like that make me so pissed-” He whispers, more to himself than anything, but then you’re kissing him again, humming affirmations, your hands in his hair.

“I love you too, I love you too.” You murmur against his lips.

Later that night you’ll see Ben’s instagram story from just before he joins the two of you again. You and Roger, arms around each other, lit by a single streetlight, you’re leaning in to him, lips inches from his, and he’s smiling gently back at you; the whole image is surprisingly intimate, especially for Roger. It’s captioned ‘I’m allowed to take candids ‘cos they love me’.

3. Someone Gives Ben Tequila

Ben’s not usually the type to get drunk and reckless. Or well, he’s the type to get drunk on occasion, but not reckless, not like Roger, who can be incredibly reckless even while sober, nor like you, since you could go either way. Ben was meant to be the grounded one. Except sometimes he has tequila. It’s an afterparty for a movie he’d gotten a supporting role in, it’d been fun, but he was looking forward to being able to spend time with you and Roger again. Speaking of the two of you, you’d disappeared almost half an hour ago, Roger had gone to the bathroom and you’d gone to get more drinks.

When he finds you, you’re trapped in an uncomfortable conversation with one of the editors assistants’, a weedy kid who couldn’t seem to figure out that you didn’t want to talk to him.

“Hi, baby!” You call out to Ben the moment you think he’ll be able to hear you over the music, and he makes a beeline for you, his heart singing when he sees your face light up.

“Hello, love, I was wondering where you’d gotten to.” He says, barely acknowledging the guy you’d been talking to, who’s own expression fell as Ben pressed a kiss to your lips. The two of you head off in search of Roger, who you find by the bathroom, talking with someone who’s clearly quite enamoured with him. From his easy stance and casual smile, you could tell he was at least enjoying the woman’s company. Neither you nor Ben were usually the jealous type, but after a few drinks, you couldn’t be blamed for just wanting to stake your claim.

“Hey, babe, who’s this?” Ben asks, slipping an arm around Roger’s shoulders as you stepped around to loop your arm through his on his other side. Roger, with a sly, knowing smile, looks between the two of you, before smiling brightly at the woman who’d been talking to him.

“Like I was saying, this is my boyfriend and girlfriend; you’ll have to excuse them, they get jealous easily.” He smirked, and the woman looked a little shocked, a little flustered, as she stuttered her way through an apology. “It’s no worry, I’m sure they can entertain themselves for a while,” and with that, he winked at you. Taking the hint, you moved, taking Ben’s hand and leading him away.

“He’s just being a social butterfly, you know how he is.” You mused gently, the two of you flopping onto a sofa. Ben hums thoughtfully, sitting beside you, your hand in his. He presses a kiss to your shoulder, trailing kisses up your neck to your jaw.

“‘m not jealous.” He said, lips at the corner of yours, pressing another kiss there before he brings his hand up to cup your cheek, moving so you’re smiling over your shoulder at him, “it’s just nice to say you guys are mine.” And his voice is low, almost a growl, and you feel a shiver run down your spine.

“I like the sound of that.” You tell him, kissing him hard, letting his hands wander and pull you close to him.

“Mine?” He asks, and his hand is on your thigh, moving your legs so you’re sitting over him rather than next to him.

“Yours.” You agree, kissing him again, messy and passionate, you can taste the alcohol on his lips and his tongue but you don’t care when he’s leaning you back to lie on the sofa. “And Roger’s.” You add quietly, and there’s a gleam in Ben’s eyes where he’s looking down at you, his arm around you, one hand on your waist.

“You’re ours, love, there’s no doubt about it.” He assures, and he leans in to kiss you again. 

“I can’t take you two anywhere!” Roger’s grinning when he finds the two of you, and Ben presses his laughter into your collar as you look up at Roger and make an insistent, grabby hand for him. “If you insist.” He chuckles, sinking to his knees to join you at your level, kissing you where you’re splayed out on the sofa, with Ben all but on top of you. “You know there’s a perfectly good bathroom not too far from here.” 

Not ten minutes later, one of the other cast members sends to the cast group chat, in all capitals ‘BEN’S BANGING IN THE BATHROOM’ which was met with either ‘at least they’ve freed up the sofa’ or ‘lmao called it’. You’re not surprised, nor are you ashamed, when some gossip rag has your face on it (or more accurately, Ben’s face) the next morning, and a riveting account of what happened with no actual details, and a photo someone took on their phone of you and Ben on the sofa. It wasn’t the first time, it probably wouldn’t be the last.

4. Roger Gets Instagram

Roger takes surprisingly well to instagram, which is both hilarious and terrifying. He posts a lot of selfies; he takes to being an instagram fuckboi like a duck takes to water. At first it’s mostly blurry shots, of sunlight, sometimes it’s you and Ben out of focus, laughing, or he gets one of you two to take a photo of him, shirtless. 

When he gets a waterproof phone, the first thing he does is take a photo of you and he kissing underwater at the beach, and then three separate, all individually hilarious videos of Ben trying and failing to do a majestic hair flip coming out of the water; in the last one, both boys get hit by a huge wave, and the video ends with you laughing, fishing the phone out of the surf.

The three of you go on holidays to somewhere sunny, and at the end of the week, he posts the highlights; you lying on your stomach beneath a palm tree on the beach, topless; a selfie of the three of you smiling at the camera against a backdrop of a starlit sky, golden in the light of a bonfire; Ben in a coconut bra, a little blurry with the movement of laughter, grinning at you just out of shot; you, in bed, making a truly terrible face where he’s just woken you up and the sun’s in your eyes. His favourite, however, is the one from him at the end of the holiday, shirtless and tanned, shot from the waist up, biting his lip as he’s turned to look off to the left, showing off how he’s covered in hickies.

The shots that get the most media attention are his more risque ones, like the shot on his story that you’d taken where you could see the bottom half of his face all the way down to his hips, with a sheet covering his modesty, but a lipstick kiss mark along his V-line and his tongue out. (There’s a followup photo on your instagram story, of your lipstick smeared, grin wide, and your hair messy, with the caption, ‘sometimes you just gotta be a messy bitch’, and people put two and two together, and conservatives lost it.) 

The most infamous actual post of his is the shot of you and Ben together in bed, he’s leaning against the headboard, still mostly laying down, and you’re draped over him, chin resting on his chest where the two of you are grinning about something. The sheet covers most of your ass, and comes up to Ben’s hips, and you’re giving the camera some pretty glorious side boob, and the photo’s framed to show room for one more person beside you in the bed, a sliver of sunlight shining through the curtains, across Ben’s chest and your back, and it’s just captioned ‘what a sight’. He’d asked you both before posting it, and you’d both agreed; it didn’t violate any guidelines, but social media still had a field day with the sweet, clearly post-coital photo.

Guided Arrow ..........part 1

Summary : Being Thea’s twin sister and also part of team arrow when you wake up in the another universe alone and no way home.

warnings : Swear words and PTSD 

word count : 2,402

Before I knew it Barry was reaching for my hand and we were falling down a building and then  well I don’t really know all I saw was white and when I woke up I was one the side of the road soaking wet and clearly not in star city anymore.

‘’Ollie!!......Speedy......BARRY!!!!.’’

No one answered.

‘’what the fuck happened?’’

Pulling my hood back I put my mask in my pocket and threw my bow over my back and started to walk sticking my thumb out every other foot. Finally reaching a nearby diner I asked for a booth and a cup of coffee while I pulled out all my gadgets trying to find Felicity’s or Barry's voice trying to find me.

‘’you look like you’re lost’’

Darting my head up I saw a man with blue eyes, black hair and oddly a trench coat.

‘’you can say I am in a way.’’

I winked at him as his very handsome friends walked over.

‘’Cas what the hell are you doing?’’

‘’Talking to miss.... I’m sorry I didn’t get your name.’’

‘’y/n Queen’’

‘Names Sam and Dean Winchester’’

The taller one with the long hair stuck out his hand towards me, grabbing his hand I could feel the caclus on his palm from oddly enough....a gun.

‘’So, Cas said you’re lost?’’

Dean asked as he shuffled into my booth.... uninvited.

‘’Yeah, I guess, the last thing I remember is reaching for flash.......my friends hand as I fell then everything went black. I woke up on the side of the road and made my way here.’’

‘’Well we can help you find your way back if you like.’

‘’YES, thank you.’’

Walking outside dean helped me into the car and we were off to their house or what they called their bunker. Once inside i made my way to their version of the quiver. Setting my arrows and hood on the couch began to scan their place. Clearly they really are brothers, not sure on Cas thou.. Possibly dean's boyfriend? not by the way dean watched my ass get into the car. Walking around I found their library full of supernatural information.

‘Where were you guys when darhk was around?’’

Dean came into the room with 4 beers. Handing one to me as Sam sat down and opened his laptop.

‘’So, let's start with your hometown or where you were last.’’

‘’Star city.’’

I watched as Sam typed it into his keyboard and his eyes going wide.

‘’uhm y/n that city doesn’t exist at least not that google knows.’’

‘'w-W-W WHAT DO YOU MEAN DOESN’T EXSIT I WAS JUST THERE!!!’’

‘’Google says nothing found for a Star city.’’

‘’MY WHOLE LIFE IS THERE, MY BROTHER, MY TWIN SISTER, MY NEPHEW! MY BESTFRIENDS MY FAMILY GOD DAMN IT!!!’’

I threw the beer onto the floor.  

‘’’listen y/n lets google your family maybe they will come up, you did say your sister in law was a hacker maybe she's hiding the results.’’

‘Okay my Sibling are Oliver and Thea Queen, my best friend is Iris West Allen, Her husband is Barry Allen.’’

Dean looked up at me  

‘’You're Brother and best friend are named after comic books?’’

‘NO?’’

Sam ran to the other room carrying back a few plastic covered comic books with the titles. GREEN ARROW and the other THE FLASH. I felt my head going dizzy and everything went black. When i came too I was lying on a couch, I could hear Sam and dean talking.

‘’Maybe she escaped the looney bin.’’

‘’maybe she hit her head harder than she thought.’’

‘’OR THE HOT CHICK IS CRAZY!’’

I made a coughing noise as I walked into the room.

‘Come sit, I'm going to blow your minds.’

We all headed in the war room and sat down.

‘’So, my name is Y/n Queen, my brother is Oliver Queen and Yes he is the Green Arrow, My sister and I are quickdraw and speedy. My Best friend is the wife of the flash, we discovered other worlds or dimensions a long time ago. I'm guessing that’s where I am in a world where I'm nothing more than words on a page.’’

Both Winchesters sat there with their mouths gaping.

‘’So, you're like a real super hero?’’

‘’I guess so, Ollie more is than me, I'm just backup.’’

‘And how did you get here?’’

‘Cisco must have breached me right as I grabbed Barry sending me flying through a breach, although this would be a far new distance for him....I'm happy i made it.’’

‘’Breach?’’

‘’’Rips or portals into other worlds.’’

‘’I need some air.’’

Dean stepped out of the room leaving me, Sam and Cas alone.

‘So, are their angels in your world?���

‘’not that im aware of cas , We have the league of shadows . My brother married their leader, We do have magic buts its really bad.’’

‘’Magics bad here too but more of like hocus pocus and hexes.’’

‘’so, no vigilantes?’’

‘’Not that I know of, I mean we are hunters if that counts.’’

‘’it’ll do.’’  

Sam smiled as dean walked into the room.

‘’can i shoot an arrow?’’

‘’Sure dean.’’

We went outside where I let dean have 2 arrows to shoot, he missed both times. Taking my aim, I shot to perfect straight into the apple Sam had placed on the car.

‘’How did you learn to do that?’’

‘’My brother, after slade …. I mean Death Stroke killed my mom, Ollie never wanted me and Thea to be unsafe again and after i busted him on being arrow and dig being spartan....Sorry Dig is my brothers right hand man. He welcomed me to the team as quickdraw due to the fact im a quick shot.’’

‘’wow.... you been through it.’’

‘’ oh, I got stories that would make your mind implode. Ive met a alien well a kryptonian .’’

‘’YOU FUCKIN MET SUPERMAN!!!!’

Dean was shouting now

‘’Well yeah but I meant his cousin Supergirl, she like my pen pal.’’

‘’ So I guess you're staying here till you can get home.’’

‘Thank you, Sam.,’’

Later that night  

Laying here in this strange bed in a whole other world completely alone.... alone, the one thing I fear was to be alone. I got up and headed for the library at least it has a good book maybe they will have a new series I can love. Stepping into the library I found Sam researching through a bunch of lore.

‘’Is he real?’’

Sam pointed at a comic with a man named Spiderman.

‘’maybe but not in my world or at least hasn’t made himself known.’’

He nodded to the chair next to him. Sliding into it he handed me a piece of candy.

‘’can't sleep?’’

‘’no im on earth 1 time’’

‘Earth 1?’

‘Well since I knew that one first that’s earth 1 , Supergirl is from earth 3 and I making this earth 4.’’

‘’thanks?’’

‘’So What do you like to do for fun here?’’

‘'Don’t really have time , the hunt never stops , I've actually been to hell , met lucifer and god oh and I Lost my soul and met Gods sister and died a thousand times , so has Dean and Cas.’

I could see the pain welling in his eyes, he was tired.

‘’Sounds likes my brother hehe Hes been through it for 5 years I thought he was dead and then poof he wasn’t, but he wasn’t ollie. He had scars and tattoo, spoke Russian and was very odd. He ended up letting his anger go and now we are happy again even for a moment, But your right lives like ours it only ends in death.’’

Sam laughed as he handed me a beer from the mini frige.

‘’Thats why we gotta go down swinging.’’

‘’Cheers to that.’

Tinking the beers together we continued to exchanged stories and advice. Sam made me feel safe like my life wasn't guns and masks and his wasn’t demons and vampires.

‘’Hi sam , Whose this.... she isnt from here.’’

I screamed as a young man with blonde air appeared out of nowhere.

‘’ y/ n this is jack.....lucifer's son.’’

‘’HOLY SHIT....i mean hi, im sorry im not used to people appearing like that unless they plan to kill me.’’

‘’I think its my fault you’re here.’'

‘’Jack what do you mean its your fault?’’

Before he answered he was gone.

‘’he does this when he is upset and feels guilty, he runs.’’

‘’poor guy.’’

‘Well he is only 5 months old.’’

‘’yeah well …..wait what?’’

‘’he aged in order to survive.’’

‘’oh...so are you completely human?’’

‘’yeah I mgiht be missing a bit of my soul here and there.’’

Sam smiled at his own remark, we headed into the library to research anything on other worlds. 3 hours and 5 cups of coffee each later neither Sam or I found anything besides that I may be stuck here forever. Sam already promised I have a home with them here and I will never be alone as long as hes around. I couldn’t help but notice how warm and safe I feel around him.  

I woke up to the feeling of someone breathing, as I opened my eyes I  found myself on sams chest cluctching a book on demi gods while sam had one arm wrapped around me and they other on a book on greek gods. We must of fallen asleep on the couch studying , he looks so happy when hes asleep like he isnt living a hard life everyday. Before I could take in anymore of the moment dean came busting into the room causing sam to jump shoving me to the floor.

‘Jacks back’

We all ran to the den where jack sat on the couch clutching his head in his hands. I walked over placing my hand on his shoulder.

‘are you okay?’’

‘im sorry’’

‘’for what....bringing me here. Ive been through worse trust me.’

He looked at me with his bloodshot eyes and buried his head into my chest hugging me tightly. He was still sobbing but at least now he knew I didn’t blame him.

‘so nothing from jack yet?’’

It has been almost 3 weeks since I arrived here , Cas has been working with jack to see if maybe he can re open the rip to send me home. I offered to ask barry and iris to help jack understand himself better, run some test and see what he can and cant handle. Then there's sam , we have gotten really close since I arrived late night studying and him teaching me how to put up warding's and devils traps. I even promised him id get the anti-possession tattoo once im home. Sitting in the den reading the local paper scanning for any sign of supernatural creatures.

‘hey y’n’’

Sam came into the room handing me a cup of coffee and sitting next to me , smiling at me god I love it when he smiles. Snapping out of my  trance I had to nod and try to catch up.

‘so jack thinks if we can find a dream walker we can send you home.’

‘’where do we find one of these dream walkers’’

‘’well that’s the thing we only knew one and shes dead but jack thinks he has a lead on another in ohio, him and dean went to check it out . Cas heard of one in California so he went out that way , that just leaves us.’’

Falling into the chair in the library I picked up a comic with the title green arrow looking at the way they drew my brother.

‘’ollie doesn’t have a beard ‘’

Sam chuckled.

‘’what?’’

‘’just how you call him ollie makes him seem like he isnt in a comic book in our world.’’

‘’this should be so odd to you I mean look what I found.’’

I held up a anime comic named supernatural starring sam and dean.

‘'that was written by god , not by a geek in a basement.’’

‘’ so whats sam / dean?’’

‘’how did you hear about that?’’

‘’im a vigilante , if I want info I get it.’’

‘’its nothing , its gross.’’

‘’so am I in one of these books or do I not matter?’’

‘’they stopped being made after dean went to hell , cas is isnt in them either..... but you matter to me ‘

Looking up sam was starring at me with a small smirk on his lips. Shaking his head I could see him searching the room in a painc.

‘’you said something about food and a movie?’

‘uhh yea set up in the tv room I got burgers and venom’’

About halfway into the movie sam got up to leave the room, wondering what was up I decide to follow him into the kitchen , sam was pacing the room on the phone.

‘’what do you mean she was a phony? , y/n is going to be heart broken.’’

‘’yeah I know dean but I do care for her ...of course id love to be with her........dean she has a family and a life....we weren't ever supposed to meet.’’

He hung up his phone turning towards me.

‘’y/n......uhm’’

Without thought I moved forward crashing my lps into his pulling him closer by is plaid collar , his fands found my hips lifting me onto my tip toes pulling me into him. Taking a step back I looked up at him feeling the blood rush to my face when dean came rushing in.

‘hey robin hood we might need your help.’’

Climbing into the impala we drove to a empty house where three bodies laid on the porch and woman with short hair came forward extending her hand.

‘’names Jody , dean here tells me your one of us.’’

Nodding I looked at dean.

‘why do you need me here?’’

‘’because this guy here says hes from star city’’

Stepping into the door, a man with his hands and feet tied laid on the floor with a bag on his head, reaching out i lifted the bag to revel cold dead eyes and a buzz cut along with the smile of the devil and his body covered in tattoos.

‘’d-d—d—d-d- dia'’

‘’hello y/n , Miss me baby doll ?’’

TW: Blood mention!! I woke up at 2 in the AM with a bloody nose. Funny thing is, I can handle blood UNLESS it comes from my nose. A nosebleed makes me feel faint real quick, which is super inconvenient, because if I pass out I’ve just gotten blood everywhere. I spend like an hour trying to distract myself so I don’t faint. I was wondering if you could write the RFA’s reaction to something like that? It’s totally fine if you can’t, me sending a request was very impulsive. :P

lkjhgfddhgkgk what a mOOD

a) im upset bc i wrote this and then delETED IT ON ACCIDENT so im vvv sorry if it seems repetitive, im real tired and so done with rewriting kjgfddklasd

b) i’m the exact same anon! anyway, i hope you’re okay //hugs

tw: blood

Yoosung:

its approx 1:29am when you wake up to taste blood trickling down your throat

gdi not again

you quietly slip out of bed, careful not to wake yoosung as you stumble around to look for a tissue

suddenly you’re hit with a wave of dizziness and you trip, hitting the edge of the bedside table with a BANG

 “…MC? what was that?”

yoosung wakes up as your swear profusely under your breath, trying to cover your face before you get blood everywhere

he turns on the light and faces you

and promptly shREIKS

“MC OMG YOU’RE BLEEDING”

“really. i couldn’t tell.”

after getting over the initial shock, he helps you over to the bathroom, cleaning you up gently and grabbing you some tissues and a towel

how on earth did you get blood on your elbow MC

oh no wait thats just a cut from the bedside table nvm

wAIT-

he dips the towel in cold water and rests it against your neck, changing it when it gets too warm (idk thats just what i do to help my bleeding noses so ┐(´∀｀)┌)

talks with you and distracts you by drawing little patterns on your skin for as long as it takes for your body to stop inconveniencing you

will wait up all night if necessary

many tissues were sacrificed that night

Zen:

ahhhh no shit shit shit this is the worst possible time

you’re backstage at one of Zen’s shows, waiting for him when you sneeze into your elbow

when you pull away, you see the familiar red liquid and promptly sigh, holding a hand t ot. he bridge of your nose and wobbling as you get to your feet

thats when Zen bursts into the dressing room, chatting excitedly. he sees you and stops short

…..

quick say something MC!

“Nice show, Zen.” (really MC?) “Thanks babe. You alright there?” “Yep. Just peachy.” “You sure?” “Uh-huh. positive.”

you take a step forward and immediately c o l l a p s e

Zen catches you in his arms (looks like you fell for him //slapped) and guides you back to the couch, laying you down

“yeah, nope. just stay there, i’ll grab a towel and some tissues” “yeah, okay, good plan. thanks zen”

he brings you some water and chocolate and distracts you by singing and talking about what he thought went well during the show and what could’ve been done better

you give your input every once in a while, half struggling to stay awake

its ok bc even if you faint (which would still suck), Zen will still take care of you

bc he loves you

many cuddles until you feel better

Jaehee:

[she likes to consider herself a rather prepared person

but nothing could prepare her for this]

she wandered into the kitchen late at night, wondering why you weren’t in bed yet

she didn’t expect to see you passed out, sitting on a stool, resting against the sink and covered in blood.

actually screams in terror (she thought you were dead

rushes over to you and panics, immediately checking your pulse

you’re still alive, oh thank god

relief for a second before realising that jhghjk you’re still bleeding

she props you up and carries you to the bathroom, laying you down in the bathtub before washing you off

there goes that outfit rip

googles what she has to do from here bc does she wake you up? does she wait for you to wake up?? she is Not Prepared

settles on waking you up by gently shaking you and talking to you until you wake up

So Relieved when you begin to stir and open your eyes

you’re hella confused as to how you got into the bathroom but it all begins to make sense when you see jaehee sitting on the edge of the tub, worried as all hell

oh beb, MC didn’t mean to make you panic im sorry

stays with you and comforts you everytime it happens so she never has to go through that fear ever again

Jumin:

it had to be now, didn’t it? this very moment. of course. it just had to be during a celebratory ball.

you felt it coming as you chatted with some friends and you instantly began to panic

okay, okay, stay calm MC. You’ve done this before, it’s okay. everything’s okay.

“If you’ll excuse me for a moment. I just need some air.” you left the conversation, ducking into a nearby hallway and leaning against a table. you stayed like that for a while, beginning to feel faint

~meanwhile~

jumin is wandering around the ballroom, looking for you. he meets up with your friends who tell him you stepped out for a little fresh air maybe 20mins ago.

oh okay

he knew you so he knew that you were most likely fine but there was a little nagging voice in the back of his mind that told him something was wrong. so, he gave it another ten minutes or so before he began to worry

excusing himself, he stepped into the same hallway that you were in before stopping dead in his tracks at the sight of you

you were collapsed in a chair, almost unconscious, with your nose still fuckin bleeding

jumin.exe has stopped working

needless to say, you immediately left the ball and went straight home

he ran his fingers through your hair as you rested, helping you wash your face and just whispering sweet nothings or sitting in silence w/ you until you finally fell asleep

contacts many doctors to figure out this problem so your health doesn’t decline

helps distract you by talking about new projects or funny things he overheard at the office or wine

Saeyoung:

oof this is untimely

you were just getting out of the shower when you glanced down and noticed a steady trickle of blood making its way down your chest

“ARE YOU KIDDING ME”

you could’ve sworn it was just water like three seconds ago

asdtyjkl now you have to go back and shower agAIN aaagghhghh

you go to hop back into the shower when you’re suddenly overwhelmed by dizziness

CRASH

seven jolts at the massive bang that echoes through the house. even saeran sends him a text to ask what the hell that was

it sounds like it came from the bathroom,,, and wait, weren’t you taking a shower?

the worst case scenarios flash through his mind and in half a second saeyoung’s up and dashing to the bathroom

when he gets there his eyes widen and he starts knocking on the door frantically

he can smell that very familiar, metallic crimson scent. (lololol seven is a bloodhound now its canon bc i said so)

“MC!! MC!! It’s me, open up!”

picks the lock when you dont get the door

literally freezes on the spot when he sees you on the floor, surrounded by bright red blood

“Holy shit, MC!!!!”

panics. a lot. he doesnt even care that you’re naked, he needs you to wake up and now. he needs you not to be dead.

basically faints from relief when you groan in pain, bringing a hand to your head to shield your eyes from the light.

“seven, what are you doing in here?” “i thought you were dead MC!” “huh? ah- oh… that… i’ll explain that later… first could you, uh, hand me my towel?” “What? …!”

( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)

anyway, he shows you all his gadgets whenever you have a bleeding nose so you don’t have a repeat of the above incident.

he helps you clean up the blood afterwards. he’s,,,, surprisingly good at it,,,,

whoops i had a nap while rewriting this

Askbox Open || Requests Open || i love feedback! and also pls chat w/ me i’m v lonely

me trying to make a gif part 2 (thrilling finale, buildup ver.)

ok good news and bad news: good news being withheld for Spoilers (not that it’s that hard to guess anyway lol), bad news explained first bc, chronologically, it is first

so yesterday i mentioned in the tags of that post that i had seen that krita has an animation feature so i was gonna try importing the frames into that and then exporting it as a gif. easier said than done, as it turns out

i started by opening the file i made yesterday with 62 layers as the frames and importing that into krita, which worked fine (i didn’t know you could actually open .psd files in clip stuido ((this typo is so fucking stupid it made me laugh so im leaving it)) and krita, so that’s pretty neat, i wonder if it works the other way around too) but i ran into problems when i tried to convert those layers into frames in an animation. because, like, the layout of the program has the layers displayed in one tab, and the animation timeline in another, like so:

(do u like how im using pictures now, i thought of that yesterday after i published the other post and realized hey, visual reference would probably make my plight a lot easier to understand!! so enjoy these educational diagrams from now on)

so my goal was to get the frames from the layers into the timeline, and i still don’t know if i did it right bc lbr krita is not very intuitive at all,,.,, i mean i watched a video tutorial abt how to animate in krita which was v helpful (it’s the one by jesse j james on yt fuckin SHout out) but it was about animating from scratch, not importing an animation you’ve already done elsewhere

so like, the way krita’s animation thing works, from what i could piece together as i bumbled my way around w/ it, is that each layer in the layers tab is a separate timeline in the,,, timeline tab

i want them all to be in the same timeline, not separate ones, and there’s no way to combine them in the timeline tab bc doing that just overwrites whatever layer you’re pasting it down onto, and also if you define the number of frames for that timeline (62 for this project) it just puts the single image of that layer for all of the frames instead of just one of them, so you’d have to go through and delete all the other frames you don’t want it to be, which would be such a fuckin pain

so i found a workaround, which is so tedious that it can’t be the right way to do it, but basically i started w/ layer 1 and defined 62 frames & then emptied frames 2-62, like this

(that blue box is the frame, btw, even tho it says 0, which actually kind of annoys me like why doesn’t it start the first frame on 1????)

from there i went up to layer two and selected that in the timeline, but for some reason the frame doesn’t show up automatically?

& i couldnt fuckin figure out how to make it into like, an Official Timeline Layer or whatever tf bc like, u see on layer 1 how theres that little lightbulb-looking icon on the right? that’s for turning on onion skin which only applies when you actually have frames with things drawn on them, so basically layer 2 in the layers tab has a drawing but in the timeline it doesn’t?

i didn’t find out what the actual reason for this is or how you’re /supposed/ to make the frame appear in the timeline, but what i did was right click on layer 2′s timeline & select “create blank frame” which magically made the frame i want appear

but it’s on top of the layer 1 frame, and i want it to be the frame after. also it’s still in a different timeline. this is the only easy fix in this whole damn process, u can literally just click & drag the frame from layer 2 to layer 1 and put it wherever u want on the timeline

and then u just delete layer 2 and that’s it, frame transferred!! then i just had to do that for 60 more layers and after [unspecified amount of time but it was a fuckin while ok] my timeline looked like this!

(the gaps near the end are held frames, to save me time so i didn’t have to copy a bunch of frames that were exactly the same)

krita is great because as far as i know ur animation can have an unlimited number of frames, at the risk of your own pc’s processing power, which is a definite upside to SOME expensive art programs i know (clip studio, i’m talking abt csp) and u can pick the frame rate too (cough photoshop elements 5.0 even tho u dont technically have an animation feature & it’s a miracle u can even make gifs at all) so once i finally got all the frames situated all nice and in order like on the same timeline, playing it was great! played at the right speed, looped perfectly, it was a dream come true right

well, time to export it as a gif

ha

haha

hoooo oo  o

so u got 2 options for exporting ur animation, u can either hit “export,” which lets u save it as different file types, one of which being gif, or you can hit “render,” which gives you gif and video options

well

i tried export first, bc that seemed like a good idea, but the “””gif””” it made was distinctly not a gif, despite its claim to be one?? this is what i got:

notice: 1. it is not moving, and 2. the black bars to the sides?? those are supposed to be transparent. they’re transparent in the file i made so why didn’t they register as transparent in the export, when gifs have transparency capabilities??

so That was some real live bullshit but i still had the “render” option, right? export was wrong, so rrender must be the correct option to go to that will produce the results i am wanting to see produced in front of me like a silver dinner platter with a correctly functioning gif under the lid, that’s what i want to see and “Render Animation...” is gonna Give me that silver platter righWRONG ok look at this shit rn ok Look

it says GIF it says it RIGHT THERE right??? right?????? then WHY

?????????????

and it also gave me all This bullshit

like did i ask?? did i fucking ask???? i already have all the individual frames why do i need even M o re i mfjgjgk

((rationally ok yea thats v useful for if ur making the animation in krita and want to export the frames to use elsewhere, but like uhhh 1. again, they’re not transparent & 2. i should have the option of saying i don’t want these??? bc *meme voice* i don’t want these)

so in the end i could find NO correct method of exporting animations as a gif in krita bc every ooption that says gif is fuckign LYING to ur face there are NO gifs in krita, aliens made the progam who looked at gifs and went “hmm i thikng this is how a gif works “ and just made jpegs instead but somehow got on the computers good side and got it to lie for them about it being a gif so thats why it says gif on the file still even tho its not a gif illimati confinr

so what is the conclusion to this? well i said there was good news too, and this is the portion where i divulge that sweet nectar (i type dthis 2 seconds ago and @ me what the fuck)

so after wasting a good 2 hours trying to figure out krita i gave up and watched some good old [youtuber name redacted bc what if it shows up in search & ppl see this dumbass post in there but it rhymes with fjackfsepticfeye] to relax into accepting my fate that i’ll never be able to upload my animations to tungle except in poor quality loopless video form, making me into a laughing stock on my own art blog, but THEN i had a stroke of genius, in my Brain

so if u read yesterday’s post u might remember that flipnote studio, the animation program i use on my ds, to animate, has the option to export files as gifs, both animated and sequential (meaning either as one fully animated gif or each individual frame separately), which is super convenient, but as i mentioned yesterday, any time i tried to open the folder with those files on my laptop, it crashed immediately

WELL today i thought “hey, how about instead of opening the folder in the sd card when it’s plugged in, how about i copy that folder from the sd card to my flash drive, and try to open it there, in case it’s the card’s hardware that’s causing the problem, not corrupted files”

so i tried that and it FUCKING WORKED THANK GOD GLORY HALLELUJAH

so now instead of spedning A THOUSAND YEARS trying and failing to force art programs to bend to my will i can just export the animations straight from my ds and drag them onto my computer Just As God Intended oh GOD im so fucking happy

here’s the gif in the end, i’m gonna post it to my art blog too but this is the Green Version bc i animate in green bc of some default settings in flipnote that i got used to, plus it makes me feel like i’m just sketching so nothing really has to be finalized so i’m comfortable while i work, and also it’s just nice ok it’s a Nice Green

(there’s a few frames at the end that are like the extra scraps from while i was working dw i got rid of those in the final version that i’m posting to my art blog later. also i added my blog url to that one too it’s aaaaaall good)

the only downside to this method is that i can’t change the canvas size to be 540px wide to fit with tumbrl s image dimensions but whatever i can just post them in a text post and fix the html to display it at its original size instead of the resizing bullshit tmurbl pulls constantly ugh. anyway it works great on desktop but it’s inevitably gonna look like shit on mobile no matter what i do *Big Ass Shrug*

anyway thats the end of my success story uhh i can’t make the like comment & subscribe joke again bc i already did that in the last post so like bye i guess thanks 4 watchign & have a great day i’ll see u in my next fvideo

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YYob4uDjEKI&t=0s

(^that’s my outro music)

beauty seems to be really funny most of the time and i like dat.

this idea that sends pop definitions of beauty running for the hills makes for some

quality distance, if only one step back.

what if i had any idea who i was but could see into everybody else

phone home cheeky cosmic touch m8 gonna think this is too easy

yeah but not let’s feel this way without before examining ourselves

for anything fake about it first parting from the idea that there wasnt anyway

and then parting cuz that knows so much

that part of me knows so much abt what do you call it extreme fear of maudlin

i run naked thru the grass singing abt yesteryear

                        ...There’s a move in social situations I like to call, “around the sun” whereby you wait for the game to end to play music, or wait patiently for one plan of another to say its peace so you can say yours. I like to take it to a more extreme level and say, turn down the fuckin tv, I want to listen to a thing I find beautiful.

SONG ONE : like the earth

1. Sit back and dream of clouded metaphors Reveal the schemes that we devised Back in the day, when ur hands were small And the WORLD splayed out colorfully Before our eyes

(chorus)

Take ur thronging bussloads of the living dead Take all the lifetimes of a million busy heads Ur sly intellectuals that laugh in the dome The only place, the only place is in the peaceful tones Of singing birds perched on ascending wires, like notes

2. Caught u up past three, sitting on the porch I woke up from a dream that I immediately forgot That seems to happen a lot, especially if previously I torched a dutch and passed the fuck out But from the ether of my dreams I heard, from the scope of reality I heard you shout

(chorus)

3. The sun and the moon both live in a box And the box is a square made out of lead And the square lies motionless in ur head Like a body on the rocks

Watch the hour tuck away into an evening A day nestled in afternoon light From the beginning In ur mind that made all minds the same The twilight creeping across ur paper brain And I can only burn and burn and burn

And I can turn round like the EARTH And I can be a sphere like the EARTH And I can stitch up the nations With fear, like the EARTH

(chorus)

                        ...people who call it a false flag just don’t wanna think it’s their own who bomb, if it can’t be a towelhead.

SONG TEW : the rainbow

The sinister rainbow blinks over the clover And the dawn is a monster in my brain I'll take a picture before this song is over And I’ll fix u in a wheel to keep me sane

Don’t break out the gin for the old lady creepers Smoke until the blur makes ur head float around I live in hades, burn my tongue on the heater When I lick this heaven ill taste yur sound

(chorus)

What Im saying isnt deep What Im stealing isnt cheap But I know that if i play it loud and long That this song in my head will instead Form a beat

Like a stranger in the rain Slowly driving me insane There's a fork in the road And I dont know whether Or when, all this shit will come together In the end

2. I got a stupid friend who lives in a pause He takes life from the tiger’s jaws, and prays

That life begins again, after it is over And the rainbow shines like a dream, in a daze

Ill take u thru the eye of the needle Ill breathe a testament to ur false gods Ill tell the truth, and contaminate the evil And zap u like a lightning rod

(chorus)

3. Dont you know that the rainbow is the world? Dont you know that the news is already told? Im gettin too old to be unfurled Im seein the rainbow in my mind Im waking up for the daily grind Im singing useless things for useful people The rainbow is not evil, its kind Dont u know that the color kings rattle like a marble In a tin can? And the rainbow eats the darkness like a mother Without a son? Dont u know that u can never be a man? And the rainbow drags across the empty land And the rainbow drags across the empty land

(chorus) (chorus)

                        ...the only division is classical and romantic. all else is contributory to these two. postmodern, modern, no. romantic. it all follows the romantic objective. one is ruled by the time at which it occurred, and the other is ruled by the mechanism of breaking from any present time.

SONG THREE : an ending that promises to begin again

1. A legend sleeps in yur head somewhere You take yur trembling hands And grope for mine, like a bum for spare Change... You cant explain

This strange perdition that engulfs Yur position in the sane... And the trouble of the pulse That leads a broken synapse Up into my eccentric brain... Theres a clot in my neck And the ruins of time Keep me from being able to find A comfortable spot to rest

(chorus)

Im stuck in erasure--a constant exposure To the elements still provides me with eyes To see bad karma writhing in my spleen And I wonder if ill dream While the whole WORLD is awake Will I be the manufactured figure, Will I be fake?

Or will I take these petty abstractions And roll them up into a ball And put them in my pocket Just to feel the reason stall In my throat... Is life a puzzle, or a joke?

2. The life you led one sunny afternoon Is the life you never led again... I can appreciate the reasons For why you did not blend Like a chameleon in the room But cant discern the seasons Of the moon

Yur whispers prosper, loud Like a passionate apostle And the lords are proud of ur Painting on the wall... That skritter of an evening gone Is enough to scatter colors When the sky finally falls, And the lords are like the brothers Of what lorded over them... Take these idols and shatter them... The racket in my brain is loud And does not end And does not end And does not end, even when the jig is up Cuz ive gotten fucked by time: Its an ending that promises To begin again

(chorus)

                        ...Nobody starts an Apollonian, and only those are Dionysian who have the capacity for restraint needed to confer the Apollonian chariot, tho some die without a revision of the vision etc. some die restraintless

SONG FOUR : chauncey ames and the case of jenny preston

1. Chauncey loved the flowers Chauncey loved the trees Chauncey smelled the wind And knew that he was free

Chauncey took a cab home Chauncey felt the air flow Thru the window He paid the driver extra Just for keeping him From being alone... Back, once again To the place that he had left Long ago

In fact, it had been years and years and years Since the man had seen walls Not fortified in concrete... In fact, it had been years and years and years Since this man had put to rest That lying cheat

(chorus)

Chauncey was a killer That was his disease Got off on manslaughter: Fingerprints on a pair keys Got him twelve years For offing someone's daughter Even tho she was eighty three Cuz no matter how old u are Everyone Is a daughter or son To someone

2. Now he's out, but he has his fears... Maybe people will not like him For his past It is unclear Even after all the facts Had been presented... Whether Jenny Preston Was murdered, or just had a bad fall Onto a bed of broken glass They found her in the hall At the head of the stairs, flat on her wrinkled ass

(chorus)

Chauncey was a man of few words But in the end he was unheard His eyes were petrified In delirium His arms shook As he held the gun He took aim On the good book Instead of his brains just to prove a point His neck is craned His eyes like coins That shine their milky matter On the barrel of a luger

(Chorus)

                        ...doubt any of y'all would live up to the wit/confidence/sardonicism y'all judiciously sculpt for hours on the book of face.

SONG FYVE: my summer home

1. This is food for thought Write it down in chalk: The chimney puffs From the fire in the fireplace And erupts in a black plume And with luck The old man Balances a spoon On his nose He sits inside a room As the room grows Smoking from a pipe While its raining outside And the light Is waning, slowly waning, outside

My fingers and my toes Are numb to the bone And I will have my wish To swim with all the fish In the sea of my mind In time ill find A little spot in the country Somewhere peaceful and secluded Ill save up all my money And hope im not deluded And hope that I can find a place Thats nice, a lush spot For a good price

(Chorus) Do you feel that I feel you? Do you feel that you feel me? The time is right to live again To let the atoms wiggle In our spherical galaxy That seems to have no real end But the one that we assume Is reality, and soon We'll eat up all the doom

2. Concentrate upon a single understanding Dont let the sisters on the throne Rage in the dome And find out that this trip Needs more planning to exist

The sky is silver and the universe is green Ill show you things in this world That you have never seen Things that have been waiting So long to be unfurled Things for boys and things for girls Without an explanation Ill bring the nation together And hold it by a tether Show you things for boys And things for girls

(Chorus)

                        ...for example i would never be able to muster the cognitive stones to say all of this, in order, amongst the company of people, even friends

SONG SIX : notion

#1 im in the middle of this phrase Stuck between the lines Bless these simple chains I'll see what I can find In my simple mind To lead to some way out The drip, drip drip of water From the trippy rusty spout Keeps me awake I'll explain that to ur daughter The world is fake The world is miles away:

Chorus: Put a notion on the river And see it travel downsteam Suspended on liquid creature dreams I sweated thru the fever And, between the middle of this phrase Passed all my days in solitude And grew weaker, as the days Passed on in solitude

You can call me daft You can say im frozen In technicolor time That im stranded on an island In the middle of the ocean But I dont have the spine To wiggle thru the shaft And give you back This simple notion

#2 I gots a paper boat Lofting on the water It travels down ur purple throat And dissolves in the water

I set a fire just to see if it could think And I questioned the venom Just to see if it could blink Nonsense on the edge Of the bullshit day Chillin on the ledge, you shape the clay And drive the screws on down And drive the screws on down

I thought of you, thought of you And I felt like a clown

(chorus)

#3 I crawl out, I crawl out I crawl out of bed I walk down the hall To turn the notion into thread And whisper rumors to the dead Sometimes I try to talk And my voice drops Sometimes the vague paralysis Defies analysis And you are left sitting on a chair In a yellow room That is a technicolor tomb Without a door, confined and spare, I crawl, I crawl I crawl out of bed And walk down the hall And fall and fall and fall Into the creation of sound Until I hit the ground And everything is mother night And the imperfections in yur eye Spangle in the strange notion of the twilight

(chorus) (chorus)

                         ...the broad concept of subjectivity has as much to do with a detailed exegesis of one tenet of it as death itself with the specific way we die

SONG SEVEN : collected and connected

You're a sharp one You're a dumb one You got nobody But the people in yur head

And everybody is connected But you aint connected to them Yur a ghost, on the interim While the fringes die out You live them out To the last splinter Until it is winter And the trees are all white with snow And the blue wind blows

Yu spend twenty minutes Feeling for the lightswitch In a room made out of figments That you shovel into a ditch And bury, along with all yur Dangerous ambitions And as you drive away, you feel The religion Of yur memories corrupt u And yu reel

CHORUS. Cuz everyones connected Everyones collected Into the same intangible organism That lives life in the schism Of ur teeth I watch ur lips move And cannot hear u speak I pick up on the clues and watch the pressure leak Until all of it is used And nothing much is left To be abused

Everyones connected by a string That trembles across the space Of every living thing The fractions of my face illuminate in the light I shake when i sing I am a yellow kite Mangled in a tree Forgotten by the breeze I am a thing, wafting in the breeze But I have begun again, my friend, Just by following the string Follow, follow the string

#2 Two days ago the WORLD was made of angles I opened my eyes to the lost ways And came upon a shallow swale The brush and branches tangled And the rays of the sun, barely Coming thru the jail Of the scary fray

Dont you think that yur fellow men Would like to lend a hand? And dont you think That this desert you have crossed Only gets u more lost Until u arrive at the brink Of the sahara, and find A single, solitary house Where a mumbling old man Is confined

(CHORUS) (CHORUS)

i always dress nice when i have no place to go. otherwise i look like a sweaty coked up hobo. its my chic, paranoid hobo chic. my comportment u say? quirky to the acquaintance, somewhat sad to the friend, an endearing mix of both with a dash of worry to the best friend, and an embarrassment to the significant other. im usually the life of the party bc i bring drugs so people are forced to tolerate my horror of a personality.

rejection is a rare and beautiful flower my time is spent tending it my life wants it to be a gift i water the flower it sits next to my bed it is next to a lamp littered under the lamp are dead ladybugs ladybugs are all over my house but if i am not meant i am not meant and i cast my line of poetry here trying to figure out if it was meant to be there wonder exactly why what is innumerable can be rare and think of lots of things

i want All of them for cassie thank u

1:  their voice

she doesnt rlly have a like ? canon voice but shes probably a low alto. her voice is sorta annoying in that childish way. she raises her voice a little when she talks unless its really early or really late nd then shes got more of a ? not soft in volume but Soft nd Pillowy nd Sorta husky voice. its surprising coming from her shitposty mouth but /s

2:  their smile

she has a rlly crooked and shit eatin grin. if shes smiling in a way that Isnt shitstirry its rare but its normally pretty wide. normally if shes smiling like that shes Laughing nd she has a rlly ? loud laugh she takes up a lot of space Vocally

3:  their greatest achievement

she probably considers graduating her greatest achievement rn dskdhsds she did not so great in school and she struggled even when she did apply herself. she was probably close to failing out? so she either barely got thru or took her ged instead. either way shes got her diploma now and shes happy abt it

4:  their insecurities

shes actually pretty insecure but she covers it up dskdshsdkh shes worried a lot abt ? being wanted. nd shes worried abt ppl thinking of her as a joke. shes also worried abt both fitting in and Not fitting in which seems contradictory but shes well aware it is

5:  their shortcomings

does her being physically short count /s

shes? not that smart smh shes surprisingly naive. shes also sorta ? quick to anger she doesnt like rolling over and taking stuff that she doesnt have to. shes the type to argue over smallish stuff. shes a ? bit of a bully. shes also easily manipulated :/ shes also real petty

6:  how they deal with grief

she gets ? rlly petty and quicker to anger. she snaps rlly easily. she cries some but Alone if she can help it. she tries to also ? avoid and ignore the issue and if ppl try to force her to deal with it she tries to fight it

7:  how they like to dress

she has 3 (three) modes: 

‘femme’: normally when her mom has some say in what shes wearing. she likes wearing her hair in a ponytail like this nd she likes dresses. she likes ? flace and florals nd feeling pretty. she lets her mom do her makeup mostly shes not very good at it. lots of blues

gamer: self explanatory. lots of black. she puts her hair up in a bun with a scrunchy. she wears cargo shorts or basketball shorts a lot. sometimes sneakers. she calls it a ‘look’ even tho its just her being real lazy

sleepy: she likes those two piece pj sets. her faves are a star wars one she has and a probably lion king one since she loves lions. she keeps her hair down in this mode unless its rlly hot then its in a high ponytail, a bun, or braids 

8:  what they like to eat

shes an unhealthy girl she loves Junk like pizza rolls and pop tarts. her favorite food is any kind that she gets when shes not supposed to be eating tho. at like 2 am and shit. sneaking out and trying to stop the microwave in time. most of time she making pizza rolls, chicken nuggets, or hot chocolate

9:  their theme

[probably this] or [this] shes the girl in both dkssh

10:  their fashion sense

Bad if no one stopped her shed dress in the gamer mode all the time

11:  their family life

its good now! shes close w her mom and one of her brothers dskdshdskh. 

as far as shes concerned thats her Entire family /s

she doesnt rlly get along with her Oldest brother or one of the ones closer to her age smh she doesnt like how they treat the rest of them nd shes quick to snap at them. shes driven the one close to her age off once but he came back. she isnt afraid to drive him off Again tho. she was in foster care for ? most of her life before getting adopted by marge and that wasnt great but she doesnt talk abt it rlly

12:  their romantic life

its also good sdkdshj she lives with her gf now and she loves it a lot even tho it can be a bully. shes thinkin abt maybe proposing in the Future but for rn shes content with what she has. she wants to adopt some pets. maybe rabbits

13:  their embarrassing memory from years ago

she has a Lot but the most embarrassing to her is probably getting kicked off the track team for excessive detentions. she considers it the most embarrassing instead of say the her extreme s j w phase bc she cried when they told her she couldnt be in the club anymore

14:  how they react to burning their tongue on food

she normally just says fuck and tears up before continuing eating

15:  how they react to a brainfreeze

she Also says fuck nd puts her thumb on the roof of her mouth

16:  their dreams

she doesnt rlly? have any solid dreams rn :/c so im gonna talk abt her Actual dreams. she has a lot of dreams abt dancing. some abt Running. she isnt sure if its from smthng or To smthng but she just knows she has to run. shes had at least one dream where she killed and ate an animal and it freaked her out a little. she stayed up when she woke up from it suddenly

17:  their ambitions

rlly she just wants to be able to support her and her gf sdkjsdksd get a nice house. shes seen how her mom lives and she ? wants smthng like that she wants family, 

18:  how they sleep

she likes curling in on herself on Top of her gf or a big pillow or a Pile of pillows and stuffed animals. but she can sleep most places. shes slept on the floor before and her bed normally isnt very comfortable. she Loves those fuckin temperpedic beds tho she likes soft comfy things

19:  their reaction to betrayal

shes mostly sad abt it :/c but shed probably ? yell at the person abt it if she Could. if she couldnt shed mostly just mope or play it off like it didnt bother her. shed probably go out of her way to avoid them tho in the future

20:  their reaction to a mystery love letter

shed be? very surprised but also touched and Suspicious sjdkdsh she doesnt think shes very desireable but she Does love compliments. shed wanna know who did it tho shed try to do some Sleuthing 

21:  how they react to pain

shes a big baby she Whines abt it. lots of complaining. she complains More if there r other ppl around who either saw her get hurt or can see that she Got hurt

22:  what they’re like on two hours of sleep

shes normally rlly ? gittery and nervous and also like shes ascended to another plane bc shed do smthng stupid like drink a Shit ton of different energy drinks. shed end up crashing in the middle of the day tho

23:  how they act when they’re sick

she whines but normally just ends up trying to sleep it off if she cant get someone to baby her. ultimately tho shed just want attention she likes to be babied it makes her feel loved

24:  what motivates them

shes kdsjds primarily motivated by Money and Food she has very basic needs

25:  why you enjoy them

dsjksddhsjsd this is a hard question but i ? rlly enjoy the dynamic she has with seth nd i like playing her and i think shes one of my aesthetically cuter ocs i Love her

ACT OMEGA PART 7

THE 19/10/16 UPDATE

Alright hi people. Gotta fun story for you! I’m sick. So yeah, the end. I’m huddled up in my room, experiencing an uncomfortable amount of stomach pain, and I. thought “hey! why dont i just do a liveblog?” and now im here. prepare youreselves, we’ve got a whole 4 pages today! lets just get started.

Oh right, we left off with these fellas. Jasprose looks more than happy to bother this guy, and Erisol looks like he wants to jump off a cliff but cant because he floats.

ERISOLSPRITE: fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck.

Jesus, not to good at socializing are we Erisol?

JASPROSESPRITE^2: Hey you! ERISOLSPRITE: nope nope nope nope nope.

Ok yep, he wants no part of this. I fuckin love Erisol. I mean. The fusion, not the ship. 

JASPROSESPRITE^2: HEY!! ERISOLSPRITE: leavve me alone JASPROSESPRITE^2: Stop that. ERISOLSPRITE: fuck thii2 fuck that fuck evverythiing. ERISOLSPRITE: and fuck you e2peciially.

Ok guys I’m relating to Erisol on an uncomfortable level. Also this conversation so far is golden. 10/10.

JASPROSESPRITE^2: I said stop it! ERISOLSPRITE: iill do wwhatever the fuck ii wwant. ERISOLSPRITE: wwho the hell evven are you anywway? JASPROSESPRITE^2: That’s my line! JASPROSESPRITE^2: Do you have any idea how baffling it is to have some random drifter appear now of all times? You’re a complete stranger! 

Its just about as baffling as everything else that happens in this fucked up story. PLUS, Jasprose, you were going around looking for fun. dont you be sassy with the depressed asshole for it.

JASPROSESPRITE^2: I mean, it's a welcome surprise and all, but I'm still perplexed!

Man I wish Jasprose did cat puns now.

JASPROSESPRITE^2: Here I thought we were finally done with all the pointless bullshit. 

We’re never done Jasprose. It’ll always just keep coming. BUT I GOTTA DISAGREE WITH YOUR CLAIM THAT ERISOL IS POINTLESS BULLSHIT. ERISOL IS THE TRUE FUCCKIN HERO OF HOMESTUCK FOR BEING THE ONLY ONE TO POINT OUT HOW FUCKED UP IT ALL IS.

God I hate that I relate to Erisol.

ERISOLSPRITE: actually forget ii evven a2ked. ERISOLSPRITE: ii ju2t met you and ii already hate evverythiin about you.

Gasp! Could this be black love at first sight?

ERISOLSPRITE: and not the 2leazy kiind eiither. iim talkiing about the mo2t platoniic of loathiin my pump bi2cuit could po22iibly mu2ter.

Oh.

JASPROSESPRITE^2: Well, if you aren’t going to tell me your name I’m just going to call you whatever I want. ERISOLSPRITE: or... ERISOLSPRITE: you could go awway. 

Oh my god I feel bad for him. He just wants to be alone to wallow in his own self-hatred/pity. Which is weird, because normally I would hate somebody who wallows in his own self-hatred/pity.

JASPROSESPRITE^2: So tell me about yourself, sad sack! JASPROSESPRITE^2: How’s sprite life been treating you? ERISOLSPRITE: ugh.

Ugh indeed. Does anybody enjoy being a sprite? I mean, its great to be alive again (unless youre erisol), but other than that you just become kinda irrelevant. Gotta be kinda jarring to see life go on without you.

JASPROSESPRITE^2: I mean, two dull troll dopes in one? What a waste of a perfectly good kernel. JASPROSESPRITE^2: Where did yours even come from? There are precisely ZERO empty kernels remaining in this session. I would know! JASPROSESPRITE^2: The only logical conclusion to draw here is that timeline shenanigans are somehow involved.

Jasprose, thats the only logical conclusion anybody can ever draw. I’m guessing though, that Erisol was just on LOWAS during all that retcon bullshit? I think. None of this makes sense anyways though.

ERISOLSPRITE: wwho knoww2? maybe 2kaiia ju2t got bored. ERISOLSPRITE: but 2ure, wwhatevver. let2 go wwiith that. 2ound2 2en2iible enough. JASPROSESPRITE^2: I knew it! I love being right. ERISOLSPRITE: holy 2hiit, are you obnoxiiou2. 

I know, Jasprose is the best kinda obnoxious. It’s like this perfect blend between playful and snarky. 

ERISOLSPRITE: ii diidnt thiink iid evver fiind 2omeone ii hate more than my2elf but youvve done iit. ERISOLSPRITE: ... diid ii ju2t 2ay that out loud. de2perate much??

Of course you are, you’ve always been desperate. Also, auto correct is hating these quirks.

ERISOLSPRITE: the fact that ii evven entertaiined that thought and contiinue twwo talk twwo you iin2tead of nopiing the fuck out of here remiind2 me of ju2t howw depravved ii really am, and that the only thiing keepiin me from obliiteratiin my2elf ii2 howw much of a deranged kiick ii get out of my owwn 2ufferiing.

HNN youre so perfectly pathetic I love it.

JASPROSESPRITE^2: Wow, are you a trainwreck or what?

No kidding Jasprose. Like, theres nothing this guy can do to ever be happy.

JASPROSESPRITE^2: You know, I think I might actually hang around a tad longer. I happen to find trainwrecks and other horrific disasters morbidly fascinating. ERISOLSPRITE: evvery moment ii spend wwiith you iis hell.

I can sum up this whole conversation so easily.

Jasprose: haha youre patheticness is fucking priceless Erisol: kill me

JASPROSESPRITE^2: Then why not leave? I’m hardly chaining you to the spot here, green cheeks. ERISOLSPRITE: ... ERISOLSPRITE: twwoo much effort. JASPROSESPRITE^2: See? Riveting.

He’s already explained this though! he literally just wants to see himself suffer.

Nice panel. thats all I have to say on the matter.

JASPROSESPRITE^2: So now that we’ve established you’ll keep up our conversation purely out of apathy and an acute, masochistic sense of self-loathing...

Yes, yes exactly.

JASPROSESPRITE^2: (Also apparently some form of conflicted caliginous attraction to me. Aint that a doozy?)

HIUDNSA <3 FUcking love you Jasprose.

JASPROSESPRITE^2: How did you end up here? WHY did you end up here? ERISOLSPRITE: ii a2k my2elf that evvery 2iingle day. JASPROSESPRITE^2: Yes, yes, you hate yourself. I get it. Can we please move on? I need details! ERISOLSPRITE: fiine wwhatevver.

Oh wow, is he chilling on the self-hatred thing? who would’ve thought.

ERISOLSPRITE: ii followwed an orange biird guy twwo thiis planet that came from fuckiing nowwhere. ERISOLSPRITE: but then he kept tryiing twwo mumble hii2 2tandup routiine2 at me 2o ii fucked off.

Yep, that sounds about right for Davesprite.

ERISOLSPRITE: ii wwandered around debatiin the pro2 and con2 of fiinally 2elf-de2tructiing untiil 2ome 2ort of wwiindy 2hiit 2tarted happeniing.

Oh cool, John’s big quest thingy. Also, that’s kinda morbid... Like, I get this is part of his self-hating schtick, but he was literally contemplating suicide.

damn.

ERISOLSPRITE: iit managed twwo dii2tract me from gnawwiing exii2tentiialiism for a miinute there untiil ii stopped giivviing a 2hit and movved on. ERISOLSPRITE: then an iindi2crimiinate periiod of tiime pa22ed and 2uddenly you 2howwed up. ERISOLSPRITE: 2tiill deliiberatiin on that explodiing thiing by the wway.

DONT you fucking dare blow up you green asshole.

JASPROSESPRITE^2: Prrr prrr, I see! So both you and Davesprite came the same way I did. JASPROSESPRITE^2: How intriguing. JASPROSESPRITE^2: But enough about how; let's move on to why. JASPROSESPRITE^2: So, Señor Fishface, what are your plans? Any unfinished business you might want to attend to? In need of a GUIDE, purrhaps? ;3

Jasprose, I think the last thing he wants is for you to guide him.

ERISOLSPRITE: meh. ERISOLSPRITE: not really. JASPROSESPRITE^2: That’s hardly an answer! Aren’t you curious about the cosmic significance of your continued existence? ERISOLSPRITE: fuck no. ERISOLSPRITE: iin fact that ii2 pretty much the thiing ii am the lea2t iintere2ted iin. JASPROSESPRITE^2: Well that’s just boring. ERISOLSPRITE: doe2 that mean youll leavve? JASPROSESPRITE^2: Let me think about that... JASPROSESPRITE^2: Nope! 

This poor fucking guy, Like, he needs to ollie outie outta  here quick, because his submissive self-hatred is almost making me feel bad for enjoying this conversation.

ERISOLSPRITE: fiigure2. ERISOLSPRITE: wwhat2 evven the poiint? ERISOLSPRITE: lookiing at 2kaiia ii can 2ee another uniivver2e frog ha2 2howwn up and relea2ed iit2 vva2t croak thiing. ERISOLSPRITE: wwhich mean2 the game i2 ovver and the player2 are probably reciievviin the ultiimate rewward a2 wwe 2peak. ERISOLSPRITE: 2o there ii2 liiterally nothiing left twwo do be2iide2 wwaiit around for an opportuniity twwo croak a2 wwell. JASPROSESPRITE^2: Now hold on a second! JASPROSESPRITE^2: I’m not so sure about that, actually. ERISOLSPRITE: wwhat noww?

Hm.. Im not sure if enlightenment is the first thing or the last thing this guy needs. Honestly I think he just needs a break.

pffFHAHA, JASPROSE WITH THE SINGLE PAP AND STARE INTO HIS SOUL

And he just

wants to die.

JASPROSESPRITE^2: Well, while I was ignoring your dismal yakking, I think I’ve figured it out!

Goddammit Jasprose.

ERISOLSPRITE: (wwhat are you doiing.) JASPROSESPRITE^2: I am almost certain now that you appearing wasn't pointless after all! ERISOLSPRITE: (...)

She’s gonna say something that’ll make him feel more shitty, isn’t she.

JASPROSESPRITE^2: Of course, I thought so at first. But then again, I bet Rose also thought that of me when I initially sprang into being only a few hours ago. And I turned out to be fairly important for the final climactic battle, didn’t I? ERISOLSPRITE: (*2iigh*) JASPROSESPRITE^2: I also thought Davepeta was fairly pointless but I agree with them now, that is definitely not the case. In fact their destiny has the potential to be quite grand!

Where are you going with all this? Come on Jasprose, don’t say something stupid to him. 

ERISOLSPRITE: are you goiing twwo get twwo the poiint anytiime 2oon. JASPROSESPRITE^2: Don’t interrupt!! ERISOLSPRITE: (wwhy me.)

I dont know man, they just dont see how great you are. 

JASPROSESPRITE^2: As I was saying. Let me dumb things down for you: Even though it may not be immediately evident how you’re meant to slot into place amongst the great puzzle of causality, that doesn’t mean a purpose isn’t waiting somewhere in the brush to pounce upon your puke green sprite tail! JASPROSESPRITE^2: And I definitely want to be here when that happens.

Is it just me, or is Jasprose giving off Vriska vibes? I’m not sure what she means by she wants to be there when it happens, but it’s feeling like she could start getting all controlling over his “destiny.”

OOH HI KIDS! I’m hoping we get to see some interaction soon. It looks like John’s hanging out at the door, so probably not from him. BUT these other pairs might be interesting to see.

Dirk/Jake: Yeah this one was pretty obvious, I’m not sure with all the. timeline shenanigans, but I’m guessing they’ll need to work out some relationship issues.

DAD/Calliope/Jane: Not much to say on this pairing, other than it might be interesting if we get to see DAD talk? He probably wont though, let’s be honest.

Dave/Karkat: Ohh yis, the gay ship that nobody can agree on. WELL I CAN AGREE WITH MYSELF, and what myself thinks is that they are fucking precious together.

Jade/RoSE OH FUCK: OK DONT MIND ME JUST SHIPPING. Ahem. So THIS is a pairing we haven’t seen a lot of, despite them both being from the same session. WHICH IS INTERESTING, because they have a really neat dynamic. AND ALSO I FUCKING SHIP THEM

Kanaya/Roxy: This should be interesting as well! Again, I’m trying to wrap my head around timeline shenanigans, so who knows how much Kanaya knows about Roxy. But Roxy did the matriorb thing! And I feel like Kanaya is seriously gonna admire Roxy, which is likely going to be adorable.

Terezi/Endless Void: Seems like they’re enjoying a nice staring contest. Even though she’s blind-

ALRIGHT THATS ENOUGH OF THAT! We got a dialoglog to open

JASPROSESPRITE^2: We’re simply going to have to wait and see. :3 ERISOLSPRITE: yeah 2ure wwhatevver.

Waiting and seeing. Oh, I guess that’s not as controlling then. Though it is kinda unlike Rose to stand by and let the game do it’s thing. . .

HMMMmm.. . .

alright that’s the end of thaat. For only 4 pages, I think I made that reasonably long. Anyways, I’m gonna end this now. BYE.

yall ive had some shit this shift...i got lectured and vaguely threatened for having to pee a lot which was coz i drink stuff thruout the day like coffee and tea which is Pee City and since ive been on deliveries steadily all day ill be gone on that for ages and have to pee when i get back as well as the other shit i do. like i was literally this afternoon joking w coworkers who are actually cool to me abt how i can be at work for hours before people who have been in the store the whole tkme will realize im even there coz im a) out on deliveries most of the time, like for real if its a busy lunch period i can be at work for 2-3 hrs and actually be in the store 10-20 min and b) when im here im moving around actually doing shit and people have always been saying how its hard to get ahold of me coz im always going around doing shit and thats another reason people dont realize im here and c) people just dont notice me so like today my freakin bad i had to pee a lot coz my only comforting routine in this place besides constant disassociation is working my way thru a drink and i happen to like both coffee and tea even tho it does make me pee and sometimes i get the coffee dumps, truth. so today since ive been in and out on deliveries the whole time and i havent been talking to anyone since none of the people who notice me were much here and since ive been moving around the store since im actually doing shit, i get yelled at for using the bathroom too much.... like i get the issue of people who give themselves Bathroom Breaks which realistically we all do but sometimes people do it too long or whatever and like yeah while im taking a shit i will check my twitter or make a shitpost or something, like we all use our phones throughout the day including the managers and im not gonna feel bad for doing that but i am not thrilled w being accused of using the bathroom needlessly when im using it coz i need to use it....and like not like i can prove im peeing every time coz i'd be glad to give you a urine sample every time but they prob dont want that.... anyways whats real good is how i was just talking the other day about how this one delivery driver who's been here forever and was just given like acknowledgement for being a good employee, i was talking w someone about how like he doesn't actually do shit, and i was like i try desperately to ignore him but now that you mention it i never see him doing anything really? and like if you ask him to do some basic shit we're Supposed to do he wont or he'll ask someone else to do it. and today he was here and when we were slow and i was like washing tables and taking dishes and making coffee I actually paid attention to him and he definitely would just like stand by the computer even tho we had no new orders and then walk to a different spot and then go back to the computer and then walk energetically somewhere else and i think a couple times i saw him carry a few dishes to the sinks. and he's fine and im doing shit and getting lectured for causing issue for not doing my work like granted this was from the same manager who once made me mad for getting on me for Slacking Off coz i was leaning on the bread slicer, which i was leaning on coz i was trying to read the order info on the computer next to it, and was also happy about because i was doing a lot of work that day more than even usual. and another driver complained about her doing that exact same thing aka complaining about Leaning when the driver had been working hard and i was like yep ive had that happen too like now i essentially cant use the bathroom because the fact that i keep myself busy means that most people, who have a tendency to not notice my presence even if i AM standing right there, legit dont know im there and nobody sees me doing any work coz they dont see me coz im doing god damn work........ im annoyed coz like i can think of maybe seven other employees who distinctly notice me and are cool with me and im cool with them, and most other employees are fine and decent to me and stuff but theres a couple people who are shitty including this one guy who just now was talking with this dude who i thought was a decent guy? and they were kind of making fun of me and i went up to the decent guy like hey i was actually right over there and totally heard you guys, coz i was not in the mood, and he just brushed me off and i was like fantastic. plus for some reason the manager who fussed at me decided to do it all formally right before i had to go on a delivery, and so i didnt get enough time to say everything on my mind about my Problems with the fact that this was occurring which i was absolutely going to do in full on account of i think its bullshit and im no longer in the mood in my general life to act like i think that kind of bs is warranted, but before i could talk about it long enough i felt like id said everything i wanted to, she was like ok u gotta go on the delivery and im like you still havent given me that $60 you forgot to cash me out and you're allowed to say what you want and i cant respond? i get that mgmt is bullshit and i had just been talkingn about how mgmt is bs a couple days ago but i just dont care for me personally i am going to answer back. and because of being abused all my life a lot of times i have an automatic response to these kind of situations where i try to speak back and the stress just naturally makes me cry and then i gotta be like sorry im crying its a physiological reflex i earned for being alive. and now that you rushed me out to make a delivery i have to be trying not to cry at work, and extend my cryish period by having to try holding it back, and also extend it on account of im still got damnt pissed about it like god knows im not one to praise myself beyond reason but im a good worker here and ironically that means people might not ever notice it and I've definitely never heard a good word from management about anything i do since i dont even know when and instead i get in trouble coz one day i have to pee, coz other days i also have to pee coz i have established one comforting habit to get through customer service bs where i get weird treatment from other coworkers at least once a day usually and sometimes dont even have a work friend around and so my fucking bad i have coffee i guess like apparently my fuckin problem is that im both quiet almost all the time and keep to myself but also sometimes joke with people or say something to them at all just to be nice coz other coworkers are quiet and dont get shit from people or are always in a less than warm mood and dont get shit about it. i close tomorrow aka there for 10-11 hrs but at least a coworker im work friends with and who has a similar demeanor is around for most of it or i swear to christ. hopefully i ever deliver to someplace with a fucking bathroom coz i guess i cant god damn use ours anymore without being monitored coz im not a good enough worker natcho like i just dont know how im supposed to have my bladder on trial and if managers are only noticing that i pee more than them and not that i do work all day and extend myself to help out when things get dicey, well then like if nobody sees it i sure dont have proof i did it other that remember that time we had a massive dinner rush and i stayed an hr past my shift and was not only the sole person taking food to the tables but also taking dishes back and washing tables and restocking junk in the dining room, no you don't remember because nobody was working beside me and so as far as everyone else knows i did nothing and so anyways too theres nothing for someone with anxiety who worries about being monitored and judged like telling me ive been monitored and judged and now i cant pee anymore, that'll teach me to give myself one nice thing thru-out the day. i also dont have anything to rely on to comfort me after something shitty at work and tragically work is most of my socialization and most of the only thing i "do" and i feel like im being treated kind of crap for the fact that i do put in effort every day to be helpful around there. like thanks that i have to bite the inside of my mouth now coz im trying not to stress / angry cry coz i have nowhere to put it. like i dont care if this manager thinks this shit is part of the job like i deal with enough shit in life right now to Not be angry about this. like boy you guys are really making it hard to think about having to leave this store when i haul off to a different area in just a bit and i honestly dont know about the fact that some people especially this one guy who is just a dick to like everybody keep saying shit comments about me coz they cant see me and im like fuck off. like im honestly sick of it and im sitting on the fact that this dude also has said racist crap ive been an audio witness too and said something racist about a coworker to her face and she told me about it like. management is part of what i'm mad at right now but if im getting narced on for the fact coffee and tea go right thru me then i think i have a complaint here whenever the next time he says some shit is like when i'm here i honestly keep to myself and try to be doing work whenever we need work done and apparently thats why im now getting shit and sorry this post exists and is so long but im real peeved and the only way to put a long rant from me about shit anywhere is to put it here

who even knows

i hate that everything makes me think of you even after how much you hurt me.  I think of everything that you had said to me during all those months.  I love you, i won’t leave, you care.  you were gone for months at a time and you always expected me to be running right back to you and the worst part I did. that should have been my sign that this wasn’t going to work but i wanted it to because i loved you and you told me enough lies to let me believe that you loved me back.  i didn’t even notice how fast i was falling until she called me out, before you said anything.  i only saw you as my best friend for the longest time.  then you left and we started talking again.  before we became anything you vanished for the first time. i thought you were dead.  i called your number but i got scared and hung up. after over a month you popped back up and we slowly started talking again.  a little bit before and after school, nothing like the late nights we used to have in middle school but then i fell in love with my best friend.  you broke down.  you were in the middle of a fucking breakdown and you decide to tell me you love me and that you always have.  and my dumb naive ass believed you because i had feelings. november 26.  that’s gonna be the day to haunt me.  we would talk every day about everything.  you helped me through stuff and you made me believe that i helped you.  then my stepmom died.  you knew her and i didnt have the best relationship but i was still so out of it.  then i got into a fight with one of my friends.  everything started to pile on top of each other and i lashed out and i relapsed after 3 fuckin years. you literally freaked out saying you couldn’t handle it.  you really think i was able to handle all the shit when you broke down just a month before? i was losing my mind during all of that but i held it together cause you needed help.  but when i needed help you said you needed time so you left me alone for hours that night but when you returned you kept asking to facetime or talk on the phone.  i dont get why you always wanted to i get it you wanted to make sure i was okay but when i say i dont like a single thing about myself i mean it. how i look or my voice so i dont like phone calls or video chats of any kind.  i got over everything.  i went to the funeral and wake talking to you as little as possible but only wanting you near me.  then you started the occasionally disappearing. a few days, a week whatever i was pissed.  you tell me you love me everyday for months then dip for a while.  maybe you were grounded like you said but i dont know what to believe anymore.  we were fine but i felt weird.  then you were gone for another month again, missing valentines (whatever now at the time i was triggered but we were only “together” for 3 months so who cares) and then my damn birthday.  you come back a few days before your birthday saying you were grounded.  but i saw your other account, saying you were active on it, during the entire month you were “grounded” so i didn’t believe you. then when that damn message popped up i wanted to be mad.  i ignored it for hours cause i didnt know what the fuck to do.  that night i said i still loved you no hesitation.  we were up texting until 3 am like we used to and i was so happy.  you always wanted to hang out and i was busy but you most likely thought i just didn’t want to.  i did but i didnt want you to see me cause i dont like how i look.  so we continued talking for months.  then you came into work, 2 days before it was a year since i had seen you. i didn’t know what to do i had to serve but i wanted to talk but i felt like it would have been awkward.  then you came to the bonfire.  damn i loved that night.  i got to be with you for a few hours even though everyone was there i was still really happy we just messed around.  but when you left i didnt even kiss you and i didnt hold your hand the entire night we just hugged which would sound stupid to anybody else but it was the fact we were finally there. i felt you pull me closer and it just made me happy.  you left and i was all gross and smiley and the minute you left i wanted you back with me.  then you went to your grandmas for a while “without service” but now everything just feels like lies so i dont know. you came back and we went on our dumbass date at barnes and noble. i dont even know why i was so nervous.  that was the day i told you i loved you for the first time in person.  god i loved you so much.  i drove you home even though we both knew you were gonna get in trouble. then you fucking kissed me. short sweet nervous but that was just us i guess i went home smiling like an idiot until i got your text that you did get caught and i freaked out a little.  we worked through your mom “taking your phone at night” because my naive self thought we were gonna work.  then our movie dates with the groups.  i was so nervous to have everyone together again and i had no reason to be.  it was all just normal.  i felt like i belonged there with you.  i literally fell asleep in your arms. the entire movie we just sat there, kissing every so often and you just held me. i dont know why but when f****** kept hitting me and you like stood up to him it just made me like all happy and shit like it annoyed you at the time, or at least really good acting.  when we all went outside for a little i was just happy.  the three walked to the car and we had one of our moments and i had to tell you goodbye again.  something happened while i was driving them home you texted me all upset and then didnt answer which scared me for the rest of the day.  that night we talked on the phone for nearly two hours.  we went to the movies again 2-3 days later but at 11 at night with a different group.  i was able to pick you up and that just made me happy because it was like we were finally getting somewhere being able to see each other more.  once again the entire movie we just laid there and i was just happy.  i kissed you that night twice then i was able to drive you home. that night in front of your building was our last kiss but at the time i didn’t know it was going to be.  we texted for a few hours after that because my friends broke up.  little did i know that was gonna be us in just a few weeks, not even maybe days. we ended things saying we would just be friends but i was so upset.  you were supposed to be coming back you did come back for nearly two months but instead we went back to being friends.  i went away a little bit not wanting to stay attached but shocker i stayed attached.  then you had surgery. in the message you sent you said talk to you later so i didnt say anything i was out with my friend i was waiting for you to be feeling okay to text me i didnt want to be annoying. you didnt like that and we got into the worst fight of my life.  you hit me with so many things that hurt, saying that it wasnt real we just talked and became a thing because we were both sad and alone and we gave each other attention.  i hated you for that.  school started and we were no where near each other but i always see you.  but of course what do you do. you are suddenly best friends with the one girl who i fought with months ago.  i talk to her and apparently you are in love with her always have been always will be. you wanted to ask her to homecoming and all that according to her.  you have no clue how much that hurt me.  we werent even a thing anymore and i still cried.  that is what makes me doubt everything about us.  i guess she could just offer you more than i could.  you wouldnt be nervous to be made fun of to walk the hallways with her.  maybe she would do things i wouldnt.  but even after everything i still miss you cause everything makes me think of you. my favorite book my music the movies barnes and noble.  i hate what you did to me and if i get the nerve to send this to you just know i hit a really low point because thats everything i have felt and there are still points im missing probably. i just miss my best friend and its only gonna get worse since you are moving again or maybe you already did if i decide to send this.  i want my best friend back.  fuck you  

in celebration for kish’s birthday i’m rereading the annotated version of the original illu so here it is for ya’ll!!

Includes my annotations from the stream and all the mistakes i made when i was twelve. its horrible. you are welcome

tw for furry bashing (i actually love furries i just hate myself)

Prologue (cara literally wrote that monologue from the hangover about being a lone wolf

at the bottom of the page)

The name Illusien has a history. A special name, on Glacitoria. It means Illumination. The name has always been given to a young woman; never a man or boy. The woman would receive her powers on her 16tth birthday; from that moment on, she became the light of Glacitoria.    The name was only given every 110 years. The name was a promise, a promise of life. She would live 100 years (????), then ten more years later, she would be reborn. Each time a different woman, a different power, a brighter light.    Each reincarnation stronger than the last. The ruler of all, lover of all, protector, savior, queen……….

Chapter 1: Illusien

The bright sun shone in her eyes. She winced and squinted as she got up and closed the curtains. Amber slowly opened her eyes. She looked around the room searching from her stuff. Tommorrow (aces thats literally how i spelled it) would be her 16th birthday. She couldn’t stand waiting.    When all Glacitorian’s turn 16, they can have their genes tested, giving them the ability to obtain their powers, and move into the above ground planet with a real sun and sky. The artificial sky and sun we so annoying to Amber.    She slipped downstairs and ran out the front door.    "It’s so dirty down here,“ she thought (kill me). "All you can smell is dirt. I wonder if Alex is awake.” (still kill me) Her brown hair glowed red in the sunlight, her freckles lit up her face and her green eyes, murky green and swamplike, shone in the artificial sun. (this is so homoerotic i was so gay)    She wondered what it would be like above ground. She hoped it would be much more lovely than this. The thought of only having to be underground for 24 more hours was unbearable. She walked on back to the orphanage. Living in an orphange (FUCKING HELL KATIE CORRECTED THIS TO ORPHANGE) was not odd because after your 16th birthday you were sent up.    But, there were in fact squibs (robbed terminology from harry potter), whose (I CANT BELIEVE I USED THE RIGHT FORM OF WHOSE) genes did not match anything but human DNA. So they were not able to go above and were doomed to live underground. Most children did not know their parents.    Being so excited, Amber did not know what time it was. She looked at the clock. It was 9:30 pm. And then she drifted to sleep. (LEGENDARY)

—

Amber woke up. Happy birthday to me, she thought. She stood up and looked around her room. Lauren was still asleep. (who the fuck is lauren) Wearily, she quietly walked out of the room.    She slipped downstairs. Andrea, the squib owner, caretaker, was waiting for her.    "Are you ready Amber,“ she asked.    "Yes and no, and Andrea?”    "Yes Amber,“    "Is Alex comming?”    "Yes, Celia is bringing him,“    And they left.

—

Amber looked at Alex, her twin brother. He had her hair, but not her face nor eyes. He looked nothing like her. (he was ugly)    Knowing soon they would pass into the real Glacitoria, was hard. (not this shit again. ALSO RANDOM COMMA FTW) It was a heavy weight. Soon, they reached a large cave. Andrea and Celia stopped.    "We cannot go any farther,” said Andrea.    "You must complete the journey,“ this time the voice was from Celia. (??????)    Amber hugged Andrea good-bye. Alex walked on. They entered the cave. this cave was dingy and weathered. There was a trickle of water running down through the cave.    Amber and Alex kept on and the water grew stronger.    "I see light!” Amber exclaimed.    They crawled out. It was loud. The rumbling of voices filled the air. (WHERE DO THESE PEOPLE GO. THEY LITERALLY ARE IN THE WOODS ALONE FOR MONTHS OK) They walked towards a door-like arch.    "Name.“ A short man boomed from a window (HOW DOES SHE KNOW HES SHORT)    "Age.”    "Sixteen.“    "Today?”    "Today.“    He told her to step into the arch. She did so. A green light flashed around her. (Daisy??? is that you………??) She saw a tail pop out on her back and felt ears sprout on her head. Her hair turned dark red and she felt a warmth.    A spark. It landed on her finger tips and went inside her. Pop! (pop yep. i used the word pop. sound effects. slay.) A green (surprise) outfit surrounded her. Black gloves popped (ugh) on her hands.    A whisper. More whispers. Then she started to float down, the light drifted away. The whispers ceased.    The dwarf (NOW HES A DWARF APPARENTLY) seemed to be in a daze. But one word stayed on her mind.    Illusien.

Chapter 2: The Newest Light

"I’m afraid I’m gonig to have to tell you,” the dwarf (ah…continuity) said, “you’re goig to start to forget who you are. Then you will become someone new.” (DEMENTIA)    "Sir,“ said the girl (???? transition????) "does this have anything to do with that word, Illusien, I believe it was?”    "I’m afraid it does,“ the (very afraid) dwarf said in reply. "That is now your name. You are the new light for Glacitoria.”    It stuck in her head like chewing gum on a desk. ( i like this analogy katie said it was stupid) “You are the newest light for Glacitoria.” She had heard that name before. Illusien.        She thanked him and left. She hadn’t seen her brother (bother was accurate tbh) cross through. Her fox ears and tail twitched. (it pains me to write that.) She stood up. Maybe her brother was a squib.    The beauty of Glacitoria is more than I would ever imagined, with undisturbed nature, the girl thought, much better than underground.    The fresh air smelled and tasted good to Illusien. She closed her green, cat-like (shes a fox tho) eyes to take a deep breath. She felt herself bump into something. (SPOILER: IT KISH)    She opened her eyes and looked up. The soft hazel eyes that looked back at her calmed her. His dark hair gleamed in the sunlight (moonlight was written over this but im so confused)    Real sun(moon)light, she thought, no artifical stuff.    He looked at her with his soft gaze. (hes actually batshit and a brat haha) It made her want to melt. She couldn’t look away.    "H-hi-um i-urr,“ she stammered. (ATTRACTIVE)    "Hello, my name is Mikish,” he said (awkwardly) cooly. “You can call me Kish.”    "Hi, my name is Am–I mean Illusien (theres a little :) next to illusien),“ Illusien said. (cause…we needed…to…hear…her…name…again…)    "You know, you’re a legend,.” Kish replied, “( I ca nt believe i ha ve to ty pe this) A (ew) beautiful one at that,” he said looking her dead in the eyes.    She blushed. (cause thats what u do when a guy is creeping on you) Wait! Mikish, she thought, the words suddenly creeping into her head; he’s a legend himself!    "You know,“ said she (why), "your a legend too.”    "Really? I wondered why they acted all weird when I went through two years ago!“ he said sarcastically. (ive used all my exclaimation points for the rest of my life and its only page like 6)    She laughed. She couldn’t help it. (ew ew ewewewwe WHY DO I HAVE TO TYPE THIS) He was so (…………………) handsome, he made her (???? what is) want to sing Amazing Grace at the top of her lungs. (?????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????)    "You tell my story (??),” Kish said, “And I’ll tell you yours.” (I love how there is always a break in the dialogue)

—

As Kish told her of her past, she watched him. All of his movents (?) so perfect, so smooth, so natural (i would fuckin hope so). He was a work of art.    She looked into his hazel eyes. They were so beautiful. He must be an angel, she thought. Only an angel could be so beautiful. (evan peters is actually weirdly attractive but lol)    Suddenly (obligatory anime faint) she was feeling super dizzy.    "Are you okay?!“ exclaimed Kish.    "Kish…” (jfc)    She closed her eyes and fainted. (why) (actually theres a reason but i didnt do this for that reason unfortunately)

–

(I do not want to type this part like no why WHY WHY DID I WRITE THIS. I LET PEOPLE READ THIS) It was dark. Illusien could hear the crackling of fire. She rolled over. Kish! Where was Kish? Kish came through the trees, carrying firewood. (another little :) )    "Well, you’re finally awake!“ Kish said.    "What happened?” asked Illusien, rubbing her head.    "You fainted!“ (he said mockingly as he laughed at her. he kept laughing. what a fucking idiot)    Oh no! (please dont make me do this) (this is literally right out of tokyo mew mew a la mode) I (plz) fainted in front of this (no plz) cute guy? (sigh) say it isnt so!

–

The fire was warm. Kish (sorry i changed POVs. now its in Kish’s pov????) looked up at her. She saw him and he averted his gaze. Her tail twitched as she sat across from him.    She pulled her hair back into (god fucking damn it. why why why why why why) ribboned (no) pigtails. Her bangs and (rolls eyes into the abyss) frames (anime hair sugoii desu) hung down. Her swamplike eyes lit up in the firelight.    His looked gray in the light. It made him look more handsome (so beautiful everyones so beautiful and white). If that was possible. (ew)    "Illusien.”    "Yes, Kish?“ (addressing one another by name so that the deer arent confused)    "You should get some rest. I’ll show you around in the morning. Don’t worry. (oh no  here we go with the white boy bull shit) I’ll always be around to protect you. Always. (haha nope)”    The words hung in her ears. (which ones) She smiled.    "Good night kish.“    "Good night, my light.” (next to it “awwwww how sweet” more like barf)

Chapter 3: Kish

“Good morning! ( :) )”    "Whaa!! (oh my god) Oh, kish!“    "Get up we must get going.”    "Kish (it looks like kush right here) what are you talking about? You sound worried!“    "I’ll tell you when we get there.”    "Okay. I trust you.“ (yoU ARE TOO TRUSTING) –

Her dark red hair bounced as they treaded through the woods. Her orange red ears stood straight up and her eyes on Kish.    The evergreen forest around her sent chills up her spine. She decided to follow behind Kish closer. She heard a stick crack. (ACTION)    "Kish! Get down!”    "What?!“    "Someone’s following us.”    They laid down behind a large log. Kish, she thought, where is he? (hes a fast little fucker apparently) Kish was gone. She heard a crack. Kish shot an arrow at their attacker. (apparently hes ann excellent marksman)    Illusien got up. She looked older now. (is this really the time for this) She didn’t think as she used to. (its been one fucking day) She walked over to Mikish, who was standing over the body. (who he killed with one shot. with a normal bow and arrow)    He picked up an amulet. “This belongs to Xalador (lmfao),” he thought. “This is what I feared!”

–

“Kish are we there yet? ( :) )”    "Almost.“    They stopped at a stream with a great water fall crashing down. (streams dont get great waterfalls…..like…no. just nope). It’s beautiful, thought Illusien, like nothing ive every seen!    "We’re here, Illusien.”    "Now tell me what we’re doing.“ –

"We are in danger. Mostly you. Do you know who Xalador is?”    "No.“ (why the fuck. she doesnt know anything shit head)    "He is a sorcerer (?). His power is greater than mine and has the ability to drain the power from you. That’s what he wants. Your power. He wants to destroy you

once and for all. If you are destroyed in your youth and not before your 100 years are up the light of Glacitoria will be extinguished forever.” (???????? okay whatever)    Illusien looked into his gray eyes. They had looked hazel the night before. His hair wasnt as dark either. It was sandyish. (jfc)    He looked at her with piercing eyes. (as piercing as an awkward 15 year old virgins eyes can be) She knew he was serious.

—

As she sat listening she had an eerie feeling as the words seemed to creep into her head:

“Mikish, the controller of mind (originally his power was water). King of all. Caretaker of Illusien. Always born two years earlier. He would follow Illusien through her journey.

Forever, until his destruction.” (too trusting)

–

They picked berries until the sun started to fade. They found their way back as it was almost sunset. Kish went to find firewood. (after sunset probably hes an idiot)    Illusien (being a fucking furry) started to play with a mouse. She got bored and killed it. (a symptom of both psychopathy and being a furry) She was about to eat it (?>>>????? fuckin furry) when Kish came back.    Kish was going to find some stones to start a fire with. He tried to strike a fire

with stones. (but he fuckin sucks so here we are) Illusien snapped her fingers and the logs burst into flames. (showy littl e cunt)    Kish looked at her. (he does that a lottttT) She smiled, proud of herself. She looked at him. She shivered.    "Good night Kish.“    "Good night Illusien.” Chapter 4: “What do we do?” (slay me already okay. also this chapter is literally 1 page front and back. thats it)

Illusien woke up. Kish wasn’t there. (this is a reoccuring theme)    "Kish?!“ (immediate panic. someone help her)    Kish was sitting on the cliff by the water fall. (okay so i have no idea why this is her immediate thought) "I wonder if I can fly or float or something like Kish,” she thought. (HOW DO WE KNOW HE FLIES??? THIS IS THE FIRST EXAMPLE AND LITERALLY NO ONE SAW HIM DO IT) She concentrated. The she floated up. She opened her eyes and flew foward slowly. She tapped down gently beside Kish. (nice to know she magically learned how to fly and is instantly incredible at it)    "Kish?“    "Yes, Illusien,”    (get ready for it. PREPARE YOUR SELF) “What do we do?” —

(OH GOD. OH GOD YES OH YES LMFAO YES)    "Lord?“    "Yes, Malaki?”    "We’ve located her.“    "Good. (fave fav e fave) Destroy her not. Lead her to me.”    "Lord, what shall we do about the boy?“    ”(THIS IS MY FAVORITE LINE) Bring to me him. I want to see the light leave their eyes.“ (?????????????? im like what cause thats not right but ok) —

Illusien waited for a reply from Kish. It was hard for Kish to say what to do. He did want to go through with it. (with what i m)    Kish thought a moment and then realized it had to be done.    "Illusien, we have to kill Xalador. If he doesn’t die, we surely will and the whole world will be under his control for all eternity. (i m laughing so hard rn)” Kish couldn’t look her in the eyes. He knew it was dangerous. But so was the rest of her life.    One mistake and all of Glacitoria will be gone forever, he thought. Or at least as we know it.    "Okay. But one question. How do we kill him?“ (illusien asking the important questions)

—

(wtf is this and why did i change povs and shit)    All of her past lives, thought Kish,she has defeated her enemies. Throughout all her reincarations she hasn’t failed. But what if this time, she doesn’t suceed??

—

Illusien looked around. Crack. Another crack. Something was out there. A dark shadow. It came closer. Then everything went black. (THIS IS NOT THE TIME FOR A NARCOLEPTIC EPISODE)

—

Chapter 5: Captivity (?)

Kish woke up. He looked around. Illusien was gone.    "Illusien!”    No answer. He waitied, she didn’t come back. He started on his way. He decided to fly up to see where was. No movement. He couldn’t see anything in the dense forest. He realized he had to track her, (this was good until this point right her) or lose her forever. (F ucKin)

—

Illusien startled. She sat up and rubbed her eyes. Kish, she thought. She opened her eyes. She was not by the stream anymore. (THE WRITING IS SO LIGHT RIGHT HERE JFC)    Illusien felt the tears well up in her eyes. (shes a cryer unfortunately)She didn’t know where she was. A figure appeared in front of her. He smelled charred. (HE SMELLED OF BURNING FLESH. WHAT A FUCKING GREAT DESCRIPTION 12 YR OL D ME BYE) And dingy. (nice. a real man) He leaned down and gave her a hand. (like a real anime gentleman) When she stood her green eyes met his equally murky eyes.    His dark hair blew in the wind (fuck) as he looked down at her. (wait i lied this is my favorite line) He didn’t look like a kidnapper.    "Hello.“ He said with a (totally sugoi) bow. (who the fuck does this little shit think he is.) ("I just met you and this is crazy. But i just kidnapped you. so fuck me maybe”)    Illusien though for a moment, then said, “Hello.” though “why did you kidnap me” would have been more appropriate. (narcolepsy man)    His murky eyes glistened (ANIME). Suddenly, she (sighhh) felt weak in the knees. She couldn’t move, she couldnt run, she couldnt (fucking stop making run on sentences?) do anything. (its the GHB in your system, honey. hes a creep.)    He was (no good god why did) even more handsome that Kish. (not rly tbh) He was hypnotising. Finally, he spoke up. (did they just stare at each other for like 2 minutes bc)    "My name is Luke. I have saved you.“

—

"My lord, we have lost her.”    "Well, then Malaki, find HER!“    "Lord Xalador.:    "Yes Jesse”    "Malaki you tell him.“ (pussy)    "Lord, we think she has found the boy.”    "Do NOT (underlined very heavily) let them get away!!“ (they already…ok) —

Illusien sat across from Luke. It was all confusing to her. (you are too trusting. he could be anyone. he could be a serial killer. a rapist. i mean. you faint all the time. you  need to g et away) The journey had not yet begun (what mother fuckin journey are you prattling about) and where was Kish? "I have saved you” From what?    She took a bite of the delicious (why was i such a fuckin weeb) rice cake, it was delicious (SLAY Me). Then she looked at Luke. (she looked at look is what i wrote the first time lmao) He stood. She stood too.    "Luke?“ (she always addressed people by their name like theres someone else there)    "Yes?”    "What have you saved me from?“    (DRUMFUCKInrOLL) "Mikish.”    "Mikish?“    "Yes. You must not believe him. He is a deciever!” (did i just watch spy kids 3)    "Kish?“ Illusien said. "He just doesn’t seem the type.” (what exactly is the type? since….theyre decieving you???)    "Oh but he is. He works for Xalador!“ (zaxbys he works at zaxbys)    "What can you tell me about Xalador ?( :D)”    "He is new to Glacitoria. Very young. In the four months you have been in Glacitoria he have been rising, plotting your downfall.“ (it has literally been like 3 days max. MAX)    "Why was I chosen?”    "You will find out. Illusien, you are the light. You are our queen, and our savior. Now, you should be worried about destroying Xalador.“ (he dont know. cryptic little shi.t)    Illusien looked up. She didn’t remember who she was anymore. (??) She turned to face Luke, who was standing behind her.    "Luke, I don’t know who to trust, anymore.”    "You can trust me.“    "Well. That’s exactly what Kish said.” (SASS)

—

Lord Xalador stood. He was ready to destroy all surrounding him.    "Malaki (i cant wait till i ge t to the glorious mispelling of his name), why is it the simple things I ask of you and Jesse, never get done!“    "Sir, we try our best.”    "Your best is not suitable!“ (wreckd)    "Lord, may we add that–”    "Jesse, fetch me Mikish.“ —

Illusien looked up (she does that a fuckin lot) throught the trees. The tall oak she was under glistened with dew. "You can trust me.” Can I really trust him? she pondered. Is he right about Kish?    Luke walked around the tree to where Illusien was sitting. He looked at her. She caught his gaze and he looked away. (ahh. romance.)    "Illusien?“    "Yes?”    He reached around his neck. He took off his necklace. It had a ruby on the end.    "I want you to have this.“ (white boy gift)    "Your pendant?” (fuckin wait for it)    "No. My promise. ( :) )“

Chapter 6: Lessons

She let her hair down. (god damn it) She brushed through it. (katies annotation on the page: "WHERE IN THE HELL DID SHE GET A BRUSH?”) Luke, it bounced through her head, Luke. (new hotter boy instant crush) She clutched the pendant with one hand. She closed her eyes. (was this it? was this the boy she was going to give her virginity to? was this love? she had his necklace, a part of him, a symbol of his affection. theyd only known each other a day, and he hadnt even asked her to be his girlfriend….but still…the necklace had to mean something….right????)    She looked over at Luke. He was still sleeping. She stood, put out the fire, and went to sleep. Luke opened his eyes (like a fuckin creeper), snapped his fingers and the log burst back into flames. (WHHHHAAAT)

— (HOLY SHIT THIS IS ACTUALLY REALLY GOOD AND I LOVE THIS PART BYE) The sun shone through the trees. Kish was on his way to Xalador’s castle. He was upset with himself. He thought, why did I let her get away? Lord, oh god, the Lord will probably kill me, I wasn’t (best spelling mistake ever) supposeded to let her go.    He shook his head. I didn’t want to bring her in the first place. (!!!!) No use fighting emotions now. He couldn’t believe he let himself fall in love with her. (in 3 days nonetheless. impressive)    He looked up, the castle was just up ahead. He took a deep breath and pushed her out of his head for a moment, and headed inside. (this isnt the part i thought it was)

—

“So who is this Xalador guy any ways? I mean seriously, no one will tell me anything.”    "When the time comes, you will know.“ (this guy is useless. he aint know shit from dirt)    "Why does everyone keep saying that?” (because i was twelve and hadn’t actually come up with anything yet. i literally sat in my prealgebra class and wrote you)    "Because it’s true. You will know the horrible truth when the time comes,“ he paused, "and that is a promise.” (grOSS LITTLE SHIT STOP SAYING THAT)    Illusien looked away. (b-baka!!) She knew he would keep his promise. She clutched her necklace, closed her eyes, and turned to face him.    "What about my brother?“ —

"Mikish, your late.” (a wizard is never late, frodo baggins. nor is he early. he arrives precisely when he means to)    "Yes, my lord, I know, I apologize.“ ("I brought starbucks tho.” “You asshole! I only drink coffee from joe muggs! the cafe inside books a million!! sarah is my favorite barista!1” “OH NO SORRY MY LORD”)    "Where is the girl?“ (he asked, stroking his hairless face. he was a dark lord. why could he not grow facial hair.)    "Lord, you must understand, I, I…I lost her. She was kidnapped in the night.”    "Useless! Everyone of you. Malaki, Jesse, and you, of all people, Mikish I trusted you to bring her to me!“    "My lord! I really,  please I beg of you, one more chance.”    "Fine, Mikish. Get out of my sight.“

—

"Your brother, made it through, that’s true. But I say with a heavy heart, I cannot tell you what has happened to him.”    There was a brief silence between them. She (surprise) looked up at him.    "Teach me. Teach me to control my powers, Luke. I know you have the power of fire just like me. So teach me.“    He hesitated, "Okay Illusien, I promise.” (shuuuuut uppppp) —

(OKAY I LOVE THIS PART LMAO) How could I be so stupid? Kish kicked a tree. I can’t believe I did this. (from this point on katie is writing the scene and im helpingokay sorry. this is us together.) She probobly is sitting with the rebel boy, and he is telling her who i really am. He pulled at his hair in frustration. Lord Xalador expected Kish to bring Illusien to him.    How did Xalador talk me into this? If only I’d known……… (katie wrote: “how much of a slut she is…..” jfc man we were so brutal to this poor narcoleptic furry) Luke looked at Illusien. Her breathing was soft and light. She looked so much beautiful when she slept. (lmfao im dying rn so much beautiful) She was peaceful. The questioning look on her face was gone. (im always so confused by the weird out of context things katie wrote. like wtf was she talking about.)    He could see the damage Kish had done. (da…mag..e…??/) She stirred slightly. He wondered what she dreamt about. Kish had put through her head so many lies. Luke could see she didn’t want to believe him about Kish. (reasonable…since she doesn’t even know you dude.)    Her gentle nature was greater than he had ever seen. (oh not this fucking bullshit again comE ON) Her radiance and beauty were equal to her personality. (nonexistant??? cause really shes kind of like a brick.) (katie wrote: “bullshit! :)”)    Illusien shivered in her sleep. He walked over and covered her with his blanket. She calmed. He wouldn’t need it anyway because he wouldn’t be sleeping anyway. (…..what he gonna do bc,)    Kish would be on his way to find her at anytime and he had to be alert. (right. cause kish is the biggest threat in the whole forest. im laughing too har d omg)

—

Kish wandered through the forest. He couldn’t find her. It’s no use, he thought, the rebel boy has probably taken her out of the woods by now any way. (neg. also THE REBEL BOY WHY DID WE CALL HIM THAT IM GONNA PEE.)    Kish was confused. He wanted to be with her but he wanted her to be safe. (be…with…her……..youve known her like 4 days, kiddo. you just…want…other things ok)    He knew this was impossible, but he couldn’t think clearly anymore.    The other night he had read into her thoughts. He implanted false thoughts and sensed where she was. (sensed where she was?? ok katie PLEASE explain this to me i do not understand your reasoning behind this.) HE COULD DO THAT AGAIN!!! DUH!!!! (i dont think m y commentary is necessary on this lmao) The answer was right there! But did he want to put her in jeporady? (thats how its spelled) (katie loved loved loved the word jeopardy) As soon as they were together again, she would be in trouble. (understatement of the generation. TROUBLE. HA. more like mildly mortal peril)    If he could just decide! Thoughts kept whirling through his head. If he sacrificed her safety for his pleasure (WOW. WOW. WOW. THATS HIGHLY INNAPPROPRIATE WORDING FOR A TWELVE YEAR OLD. WOWZA) he would be a jerk. If he didn’t look for her, he would be killed.    Maybe they just weren’t meant to be………….

—

Illusien stirred. She slowly opened her eyes. It was morning. (WILL LUKE BE THERE.) She looked down and realized that Luke had given her his blanket in the night. The fire had long since gone out.    She wondered where Luke was. She hadn’t seen him since last night. (OH NO)    As hard as the truth is to realize, Illusien said to herself, I’m starting to believe Luke. (under what basis? you’ve hardly spoken to the guy, and the only thing you really know about him is that he’s kinda cute and he smells bad. he told you that the last guy you were with was the bad guy but you didn’t really have any stock yourself that made it fit and you have absolutely no reference that can tell you if thE MAN WHO KIDNAPPED YOU IN THE MIDDLE OF THE NIGHT IS TELLING YOU THE TRUTH) (like sorry that birdman jr told you no flamingos when it came to kish but like you dont really know either of these guys) I mean, if kish was really that worried about me, wouldn’t he come looking for me? (girl)    And waht about when I brought up the subject of Xalador? He spoke hesitantly and always seemed to be hiding something. (did he??) Luke, wouldn’t lie to me, would he? (YOU DONT KNOW THAT.)    Luke, she was starting to fall for him. (YOUVE DECIDED THIS IN LESS THAN 3 PAGES) He was handsome and charming. (not the word i would use) But still, she still was getting over how Kish had built up her trust and was going to turn her over to the “Lord Xalador”. (but still she still)    She sensed Luke in the near distance, heading back. (her furry senses were tingling) Illusien quickly made sure her hair was in place, her ears neat, her tail shiny, and that she had nothing on her face. (picturing her grooming herself was the least attractive thing and im sure luke is not into furries either…however…..birdman jr)    Luke approached her. “Good morning.”    "Good morning, Luke,“ she blushed.    "I assume you’re ready for your lessons today.”    Lessons! Shoot! (shoot. shoot. i said shoot) I had forgotten about those. Of course I’m not ready! But I can’t let him know that!!    (katie wrote most of this scene lmao)“Okay, first, Illusien, you need to stand on that rock.”    "Okay, now what?“    "Incenerate that tree!!!” (god)    "What? OH!“ She snapped her fingers and pointed at the tree.    "It didn’t work, Luke.”    "You have to concentrate Illusien.“    She tried again. She thought only of what she was doing. (thats kind of shitty??/ like you have super powers but theyre INCREDIBLY difficult to use. like if you get mildly distracted they don’t work anymore) She snapped her fingers and the tree bust into blue flames. (i wrote that the flames were blue bc blue/white is REALLY HOT FIRE. but….then katie picked up after this paragraph.)    "Luke, why did it burst into BLUE flames?”    "Because the tree posed no threat to you. Your powers are enhanced when you are angry or scared. I am also holding back your power. (HOW IS HE DOING THAT. THATS SO FUCKING RANDOM) If I didn’t, you would probobly set the whole forest on fire.“ She gave him a questioning look. (ME TOO ILLU. What he’s describing as what he’s doing: holding back your power, sounds an awful lot like xalador’s power. because xalador drains the power from others. If Luke has the ability to siphon off her power, that would most definitely point to an ulterior motive in this plot. so thanks for making shit up katie. congrats on being 12)    "Illusien, your power is so great, so powerful, that you have enough to light Glacitoria. So, you could easily set fire to this forest. Your powers need to be controlled. This is what I’m trying to teach you.” She nodded and hopped off the rock.    "As long as you are with me Luke, I think I’ll be just fine.“ (my face right now. just imagine it. like ew no stop jfc) Illusien stared deep into Luke’s eyes (fidskfvcmdcx vfv) . Luke took her hand. (hand is darkened and underlined like 13 times and im so disappointed in katie rn. i trusted her) (thank god i write the next tiny little section)

—

Kish’s anger was getting worse. There was nothing to hold him back. He hated Xalador, but he knew this is what Xalador wanted, but he felt he must find her. (OOPS. NOT FINGER HER OMFG.) (ALSO THAT SENTENCE MADE NO SENSE) The conseqences were great, but he wanted to be with her more than l fe (thats what it says??) itself, and nothing was about to stop him. (oh gross, me. wtg. thats just. no. save me from myself)

—

Luke (was is scratched out) is incredible! He has taught me to control and use my powers. (literally no he didnt. you stood on a rock and he talked about how you were so stupid that you were going to burn the whole world down. which is actually probably right) But what would I do without him, she throught. (IM PISSING @ THROUGHT)    I’m just taking a quick break, but still. I wonder how he knew where I was the other night. (a little thing called stalking..?) Never mind that. (NEVERMIND THAT???? YES MIND THAT. YES MIND THAT WITH EVERY FIBER OF YOUR BEING) Oh Luke’s calling me. I wonder what I’ll have to do now. Oh well as long as I’m with him. I know I’m safe. (YOU DONT KNOW THAT YOU DO NOT KNOW THAT. I REALLY WANT TO HOLD YOU AND TEACH YOU SELF DEFENSE. AND IDK TEACH YOU ANYTHING ABOUT  ANYTHING OKAY IM A CONCERNED MOMMY)

—

Luke looked at Illusien. (he couldn’t believe she was this niave. It was far too easy to get her alone. Insert creepy thoughts here bc that hair is not the scariest thing about him ok) She seemed ready to start again.    "Okay, Illusien, stand on the rock again.”    Illusien stood upon the rock. (fun fact, this whole thing still takes place in my old back yard in my head bye)    "All right, now concentrate, (NO NO NONONONONOONNOONNOONONNONNNNOOOOOOOOO NOOOOOOOOOOOO) (WHY WAS I SUCH A FUCKIKNG IDIOT. THIS IS THE MOST EMBARASSING THIHNG WHY DO I HGAVE TOT TYPE IT) think a feeling, a wonderful feeling, a time or place or thing that makes you feel such a way. Let it fill you. Now fly.“ (JUST KIDDING. LUKE IS ACTUALLY PETER FUCKING PAN GOOD BYE)    She did as he said. She let it fill her. She started to rise. Up higher and higher. She was flying!

—

Kish was still looking for Illusien. He looked up. Illusien, he thought. Now’s my chance!    "Illusien!” —

Illusien opened her eyes, she was falling. The ground was getting closer. (I LITERALLY JUST REALIZED THAT I WROTE THIS EXACT FUCKING SCENE IN VIOLETS THING A YEAR LATER THATS HOW ROMANTIC AND GREAT I THOUGHT IT WAS. BYE) She closed her eyes and braced herself. She felt something catch her and break her fall.    She opened one eye. Luke, had caught her. (unnecessary commas FTW) She blinked.    "Luke,“ her cheeks flushed. (WHY DOES THE TOP OF LITERALLY ALMOST EVERY SINGLE PAGE JUST HAVE "Ichigo” WRITTEN THERE.)    Luke let her down. (she was grateful for that. She would have been much more grateful, however, if Luke would take a god forsaken bath. He smelled so rancid as their bodies pressed against one another. It was off putting.) Illusien stared deep into his eyes. Luke pulled her into a kiss. They were so close she could feel his heart beat. (wow)    It was long and slow. (cool) Illusien finally pulled away at the sound of a rustling in the bushes.

—

Kish stepped out of the bushes. (Sniveling, he tried to look like he hadn’t started to cry, but his eyes were telling all sorts of tales, brimming over with salty liquid. Not tears. They most definitely were not tears. He wasn’t crying.) He had a look of anger on his face. (But it wasn’t anything more than a facade. He was hurt, hurt right down to his core.) Luke stepped out in front of Illusien.    "You stay away from her, Mikish! You’ve done enough damage already!“    (He clenched his jaw, his hatred of Luke allowing him a new strength. His voice came out in a growl, his loathing dripping out the way an angry dog drools, throwing its barks directly at what’s pissing it off.) "Fool. (the best insult in the world) You don’t know who you’re messing with, Rebel. Now step aside, Rebel, she’s mine.”    "No. I won’t. You’re selfish and evil ways won’t prevail. (oh god why did i) Eat fire! (eat. fir re. good by ee. RIP in piss @ me) Luke shot a fireball at Kish. Kish stood. (aflame. He was aflame, burning alive in his own homosexuality) (seriously tho he just stands up like nah u cant burn me bitch )    "I see. But this won’t be the last you see of me. Illusien, I’ll be waiting.“ (thats…it?? wow way to be a man mikish) He took one, longing look at Illusien. She was staring at him with a blank look, her cheeks still flushed from kissing Luke. He shook his head and walked away. He could feel the both of their gazes on him. He just kept on walking. (oh, bae.)

— Chapter 7: Love and HATE

"Luke, ”    "Illusien, we have to be careful now.“    "I know, I just don’t know what to do.” Her tears stained her cheeks. (are they ink bc thats not how that works.) Luke put his arms around her.    "I just worry for your safety, Luke.“ —    (YES MORE ANGRY KISH HAPPY BIRTHDAY KIT) I should have known! Kish hit his head with his hand. How could I be so stupid? She doesn’t love me; she loves the rebel.    He kicked himself. She’d either be his or die at the hand of Xalador. He would take care of the rebel himself.    Oh, how he hated the rebel. He envied him for stealing her heart before he had a chance. Before…….(oops! wait)… Before……….. (before kish was able to lose his virginity?? is that what we’re getting at bc………….. lol)

—-

Luke could’t believe what had just happened. He and Illusien finally had a moment to themselves, what he had be wanting for such a long time, and he couldn’t enjoy it. (you have literally been alone together this whole time i’m/)    Mikish had ruined everything. They had to move on. Mikish would surely tell Lord Xalador their whereabouts.    He hated to see the tears in Illusiens eyes. The look of terror on her face had startled him.    He would do anything for her, even sacrifice himself. (plz do. right now) Her beautiful face had been twisted with fear and he kept replaying in his mind.    He was (god fucking damn it) truly in love with Illusien. (do they live on a planet where love is just constant and always in your face bc) He had never been this way toward anyone else. Now that Kish had been angered (Aangered. lmfao), he would be attacking Illusien’s thoughts more often. (WHY DID I NOT DEVELOP ON THIS. okay its very important to note JUST HOW OVER POWERED KISH IS. Kish literally has the ability to read peoples mind/change their thoughts/manipulate them/possess peoples minds/detatch his own soul from him body. BU T THATS NEVER COVERED. KISH LITERALLY IS SO FUCKING POWERFUL)    And Luke could not see this happen to her anymore. Illusien gentle touched her fingers to her lips. She couldn’t believe Luke had kissed her. (good fucking god no this is some bull) She rememebered seeing Kish and his anger and jealosly (scratched out and corrected to jeluosly and then jealosy. are either of those correct even ) and the hatred in his eyes.    His words would haunt her forever. She flushed at the thought of Mikish. (what)    Luke was right. Kish is just a deciever. What was I thinking trusting him? He was just thinking of himself. She hated Kish. (wow) There were not many she hated. (IM HOWLING RN LMAO)    She leaned against the tree. Still in shock over what had just happened. (thats not a sentence.) She needed Luke more than she knew. (ew good lord, abraham help little me. some force go back in time and just delete this sentence from existence.)    (top of the page reads: “KATHERINE JANE PARR LUVVS THIS BLUE PEN!!!!”) An eerie feeling crept over her. She stood motionless.    "Luke?“ (OH FUCK WHERE IS HE)    Silence.    "Luke?” (UH Oh)    Silence. She (FUCKING HELL THIS TYPO IM LAUGHING SO HARD) turened around. A dark figure appeared behind her. (i hope its luke)    "(man fuck 12 year old me) How dare you deny me. Illusien, (MAN FUCK 12 YEAR OLD ME) oh yes, you shall now have to choose between me and death!“ (bye im dead)    "Kish?” She backed up. “Luke! Help!” (damn it) (this scene is so)    He darted at her. She flew up. She shot a burst of flames at Kish. Luke appeared below her. He shot a burst as well. (this aint a scene) (its a goddamn cry for help)    "Go back to the shadows Mikish.“ (didnt i already say this shit? it was stupid the first time)    "Not without her, Rebel.” (why did we call him that its not cool)    "She’s not going anywhere.“ (why dont we let the lady decide?)    "Then I’ll kill you.” (WHOOOOAAAAAA. WHOAAA. DUDE CHILL.)    Illusien stepped out in front of Luke. “You will not Kish. (why nottttttt its turkey season) I don’t plan on going anywhere with you anytime soon.” The tears poured down her face as she said this. (bitch y u cryin)    "I’m not going with out you Illusien!“ (normally this would be when he became a weird 3rd wheel companion and they became his parents lmao but)    "I’m not going with you, I plan on staying with Luke.”    "I could make you (ew wwww ui dont wanna type this part) b(ereeewwwww) my (fjkldsadhfldjfkldjfkdjkfjdk) pup (py he sai d puppy) pet if I wanted to.“    "But you won’t. So if you would kindly leave.” (WHOA. FIRE QUEEN ICE COLD SIR)    "This isn’t the end. I will never surrender.“ (im so glad i learned how to write dialogue) And he left.    Illusien dropped to her knees. Luke picked her up in his (sighs forever) strong arms. He carried her back to the campsite. (thank god this sce ne is over)

—

Luke laid Illusien down. He looked at her. (way to be a creep. just stare at her. im sure she doesnt mind) He knew it was hard for her. Her first battle, it must have been rough. I’m starting to worry about her though. (random shift into first person ok)    She’s scared of what will happen next. I can honestly say I don’t blame her. (this next part was written so light that i thought the chapter was over)    He kissed her gently on the lips. She smiled back at him. She dropped her head and fell unconscious. (SLAY ME) (BURY ME IN SATIN) (NARCOLEPTIC FURRY MAN)    He covered up. (a gentleman) They could move in the morning. She needed to sleep. Her first battle would be the worst. (I HIGHLY FUCKING DOUBT THAT. THERE WERE LIKE 3 MOVES MADE???? i mean like yeah the first gym leader is harder to beat but like then you get a solid team going an shit but like the elite four??? ok)

—

Kish stomped off. (surprise) If only he could lure the rebel and Illusien somewhere towards the castle. Or at least get them away from each other. But Illusien wasn’t ready fight yet and Killing the rebel with her alive would cause her to hate him, although she already did. (what is happening)    He sat down. He had to come up with a plan. Just what would he do? (who knows man)

—

"Jesse, has he found them again?”    "Yes my lord. He had told us where they are.“ (how ???HOW YALL BITCHES AINT GOT PHONES????????????????????? TELL MEE. like i just came up with a way literally right now but i was 12 so)    "Good. If Kish has fought them–”    "He has.“ (imagine Xaladors face at being interrupted. imagine the angry egg salad)    "Then she will be weak. She will have to rejuvinate the entire night.” (ooooohhhhhhhhh so tough to do??? like go to sleep shes really good at that)    "Yes sir, that is correct.“    "Malaki, send some troops (this is where the random troll army comes in???) in. I want to capture her while she’s weak.”

—

Illusien opened her eyes. She was feeling better. Luke was sitting by the fire. (INCREDIBLE. HALFWAY THROUGH THE NOVEL WE SEE SOME INCREDIBLE CHARACTER DEVELOPMENT. LUKE IS THERE WHEN SHE WAKES UP FOR THE FIRST TIME EVER.) She stood. She walked over to Luke. She sat next to him. (good sweet bagel bread wtf is this bullshit why )    "Luke we have to do something soon.“ (damn not even a good morning)    "I know. But I don’t want to lose you.” (bitch aint no one said shit about losing no one?? chill)    "Luke, you won’t. And that is MY promise.“ (deep fry me and put chocolate sauce on me because im so fucking done)

—

(this whole next page is scratched out. who knows what it holds but im gonna decipher it) Luke looked at Illusien. she was worried and knew they had to move soon. He looked into her murky green eyes, then looked away. (jfc man. youre so pathetic)    "If anything happened to you, I’d never forgive myself.”    "And I’d never blame you, Luke. I love you.“ (BYE FELICIA. IM DONE WITH U)    He pulled her close. she buried her face in his chest. She looked up at him.    "We have to kill him soon.” (NOW WE’RE TALKING. THIS IS WAHT I CARE ABOUT GIRL)    Illusien looked at Luke. (they do that so much) (also looked at look. ive always done that so muc h lmao) She held her breath.    "I know we’ll head there soon. Just not yet. You’re not ready.“    "Luke will I ever be read? Of course I won’t. But I know what I must do and I intend to do it.” She pulled away from Luke.    "At least rest the night you’ll need your strenghth (lmao). Promise me this.“    Her cheeks flushed.  "Fine, but we’ll head tomorrow.”    Luke pulled her into another kiss and her flush disappeared. She didn’t pull away. He broke away and kissed her forehead. “Good night.” Chapter 8: Destiny’s light

(at the the top of this page i wrote: “IM CHECKING OUT AT 11:30!!!!!” and katie wrote underneath it: “YOU GAY CRACK MONKEY” good lord) “Illusien must die now. Jesse, I cannot wait any longer. Malaki’s troups (is that the correct spelling i dont think so) should have found them by now.”    "Yes, my lord, we understand.“    "Hurry, we don’t have all night.” — “Luke I can’t sleep anymore.”    "It’s alright then. Just sleep as much as you can.“ (when the narcoleptic furry cant sleep)    (this whole part is scratched out, but as the rules say, i have to type it) Illusien scooted closer to Luke. (lol no wonder. Katie wrote like this whole page) He looked away.    "Illusien.”    "Yes, Luke?“    "Maybe it’s best if we…..”    "Yes?“    "Nevermind, Illusien. It isn’t right.” (is he askin to fuck bc)    "Okay…..“ She gave him a quesitoning look. He shook his head. (HE WAS)    Illusien took his hand. He brushed it off and got up. ("That’s not helping my boner, Illu.”)    "What is wrong, Luke?“    "Nothing.”    "Don’t say that. I know something is wrong. You don’t brush me away from you for no reason.“ (???? im lost af tbh.)    "Alright, it’s just that I keep thinking that you and me together are bring Mikish here. He seems to be drawn to us.”    "I don’t think so. It’s just his jealousy of you.“ (okay so disregard everything in that blurb because it makes no sense)    "I just can’t help feeling you know if he’s watching our every move.” (??? what does this even mean or say) `    "I know I get the same feeling.“ She looked at him dead in the eyes. (notice she didn’t look him dead in the eyes. she was dead in the eye in this sentence. amazing what one word can change)    "And that’s why I seek your comfort.” (they fuckin yall) —

Why did I tell them where they are? Kish felt like a total idiot. Now she will die. This massacre of my own heart, killing itself and all others in its path. (THERE I AM. LOOK AT THIS BEAUTIFUL METAPHOR. I WAS IN THERE SOMEHWERE)    Hot tears streamed down his angry face. He hated her, he loved her. He hated the rebel, the rebel loved her, she loved the rebel back. He hated himself. (man this is good. of course i could write angst)    He looked to the sky. A cloudy night. Ugly, he said to himself, just like the rest of this world, all of the world, (especially Luke. Goddamn that fucker was ugly), except her.

—

Illusien sat away from Luke. She closed her eyes. She turned away from him. After their conversation she could bear to look at him. She knew he was trying to protect her but of ocurse she wished they didn’t have to worry about each other’s safety. (healthy relationships normally don’t have that element)    Illusien wiped the tears from her eyes. If Luke hadn’t saved her she would be dead. But of course, now he pushed her away. The tears came again. (GIRL YOU DONT NEED A MAN. MAYBE A HOSPICE NURSE, BUT NOT SPECIFICALLY A MAN)    She heard a nose. (not a noise. a nose) Then a rustling in the bushes. She looked, the movement stopped. (this part is so ?/?) Her hair had grown long. She picked at it. The rustling resumed. (the fuck was that about lulu. why was that a necessary detail @ 12 yr oldme)    Luke stood. Illusien looked at him. (THIS PART IS SO WTF WHY DID I DO THIS BECAUSE IT AINT MAKE A LICK OF SENSE) Then thousands, maybe hundreds of thousands (thats a v big jump in numbers) of Malaki’s troups poured in.

—

“My lord, I have good news.”    "What is it Jesse?“    "Malaki has found them and the ambush is in process as we speak.” (UHM HOW DOES HE KNOW HOMIE)    "Good. Tell Malaki to kill no one. Bring them all to me.“

–

Illusien let out a scream as she was quickly aprehended. It all seemed like it was in slow motion to Luke.    (this is my favorite part) "ILLUSIEN!!!!!”    He fought the troups. He made his way to Illusien. He was in arms reach of her hand. He went for it, but just grazed her fingers.    "I’m sorry,“ he called back. He looked at the face of the one holding her. Maliki himself. (!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! MALIKI) The scar across his face contrasted her beauty. He was pulled away. Tears stained his eyes. (inky ass tears) He was trampled, and that was the last thing he saw, troll feet. — “Illusien.”    She blinked awake.    "Illusien.“    Her dream faded. She was alone. (yet another kink coming guys. i do not disappoint.) The rusty bars gave away her location. Xalador’s dungeon. A gruff voice mumbled behind her. (and to the end of the line we have <3<3<3<3<3<3<3<3<3<3<3)    (And here, I blatantly stole shit from Aladdin, a movie that Im not even fond of) She turned. An old man (????/??) sat behind her. He saw the tears on her face. (i wish yall could see my face right now because i am looking so concerned for this b)    "What’s the matter with you?”    "I just want to see them one last time.“ (girl chill dont be laying it all on this brother. YOU AINT KNOW HIM)    "Who?”    "Luke and my brother.“    "Ah the love of your life and the brother you miss dearly.” (yeah, martha stewart we don’t need your commentary)    "Yes.“    "Well, I can’t promise you’ll see this Luke person again, but you will see your brother again.”    Then he seemed to disappear. She was once again alone. (WHERE DID HE GO. WHAT HAPPENED. WHAT SIGNIFICANCE DID THAT HOLD)

—

“Lord, she’s in the castle dungeons."        "Good job, Malaki. Now resume your post.” (which is?)    "Yes, sir.“    "Jesse, go check on our other prisoner. He might like to see Mikish,” he said with an evil smile. (THE TRIFECTA)

—

Luke woke to a great darkness. The silence was eerie and there was little light. (theres little light in this story anyway. as in little hope that its ever going to get better.) (I JUST REALIZED WHAT PART THIS IS AND IM GOING TO VOMIT) A red crystal appeared in the distance. It light up the darkness. There seemed to be no ground. He seemed to be floating between life and death. (how does that seem exactly)    A slight humming noise accompanied the crystal. It was growling (i think i meant growing) closer. A sound was comming from the crystal, getting louder as it grew closer. A heartbeat.    It grew closer and closer until it shattered. The beating still growing louder and louder. then he realized it was the beating (blehgggg) of (ew) her broken heart. (????/ she aight actually.)

—

Kish was in pieces. He had been called to see Lord Xalador again. He knew that they had found Illusien and the rebel boy. (scratched out bc i was literally about to PUT IN ANOTHER GUY BECAUSE LULULUKE WASNT WORKING: “He had never even found the chosen boy”) He himself had failed his task. As soon as Xalador released him, Malaki would kill Kish.    Either way, he was dead. Now, he had to make a decision; to run or face his fears.

—

Illusien sat alone. She kept thinking about how she would die and never see Luke or her brother again.    "Amber?“    "That name sounds familiar.”    "Amber is that you?“    "I don’t know you! I don’t know any Ambers!” (poor narcoleptic furry with amnesia)    Then she saw the face, the familiar face, but then it disappeared. she cried. (surprise) The tears came without control. Then she stopped, a glimmer of hope. She felt it come over her. She would see her brother again and she would see Luke. She didn’t know how, but she would.

—

Luke’s dream faded. (look at my amazing dictation that definitely never repeats itself.) His breathing was heavy. (he had a good dream apparently lmao) Sweat rolled down his face. He saw the bars. He had been captured.    What about Illusien? (written in my secret code with katie that we used through middle school is this guys name: jake, its spelled star-of-david, comma, backward k, e with a tilda over it. nice) She couldn’t be dead yet! He remembered his dream. Then he rememebered how he had treated her. (dude shut up. that was like the newlywed version of an argument and im not even sure why you started it)    "Lord, let her be alive!“    Footsteps echoed throughout the dungeons. He sat up straight. The solemn face that looked back at him was none other than (the bae) Jesse.    "You all set?”    "No.“    "Tough luck.”    "Tell me.“    "Tell you what?”    Luke grabbed Jesse by the collar of his shirt. (i guess through the bars)    "You know what I mean Jesse.“    "Oh! The girl. Yes. She’s alive. Not for much longer though.” (sass)    "My brother, you’re making a huge MISTAKE. I can’t believe you w—“ (katie was like "whore amiright” and i was like “would do this???”)    "Jesse, the guest is here.“    Kish walked in. He didn’t show any emotion on his face. Luke walked away to the other side of the cell.    "Now Kish, you realize my brother is here on your account.”    "Yes I do.“    "Well I’ll leave you two alone to talk.” Jesse walked away.    More footsteps sounded, then a door closed.    "Look rebel, I didn’t want to hurt her. But you on the other hand–“    "It’s your fault. She’ll DIE because of you. Your selfish ways have once again left another to die. If she dies, we all die. Me AND you.” Kish looked away.    Kish said nothing more and turned and left. Luke knew he had to save Illusien soon or they would both perish.

—

Illusien startled. The clanking of metal and the jingle of keys.    "The time has come.“

—

Jesse came back. This time he unlocked the door. Then pulled Lukes arms around his back. (that sounds way different than its meant. it sounds like he made luke hug him)    "I’m sorry, Luke, but now is your time.”

—

(sexual tension oooooo) Malaki forcibly pulled Illusien out. (more kink from me. im so fucking sorry im so sorry) He pulled her against him. “My, my, what a beautiful girl in such an ugly dungeon.” (KATIE ACTUALLY WROTE THAT DIALOGUE LMAO)    "It’s people like you that put me in this position.“ (SASS FROM LULU) Malaki slapped her across the face. Her cheek grew red. A sly smile ran across his scarred face.    The anger seared inside her. She felt the flames enclose her. Everything came naturally. (NEVER HIT SOMEONE FOR NO REASON DICK HEAD) She sent all her force at him. He was knocked down. He laughed. (he fire proof too??? this some bullshit)    Her grabbed her once again and took her out of the cell. (you aint run or nothing lulu????) Chapter 9: Betrayal

Luke had seen and heard what Malaki had done to Illusien. (goddamn it shut up) Thankfully, she was alive, when she passed by him he was relieved. But, then again, Malaki was so cruel to her. (CRUEL MALIKI)    Luke was drug along behind her. Being so close to her was hard for Luke. (why? can u not control ur bonerz?) He thought back on what he had said. Mikish was the least of their problems now.    He walked on. Being held by Jesse was one of the worst experiences. His own brother was leading him and the most beautiful woman he had ever met (is that really an important detail at this point in the plot????) to their death. (their singular death. they are one)    He stood strong and fought the tears (lmao be a man fight those tears birdman jr)  for he feared her life more than his. (noble tbh)

—

Illusien walked with her head down. How had Malaki absorbed her attack? (tbh i wanna know) She was scared. (A FUCKING UNDERSTATEMENT SHE IS ABOUT TO DIE TO SAY SHE IS ONLY SCARED IS A BUNCH OF B-O-L-O-G-N-A: bullSHIT)    She daren’t look at Luke. (bye. kill me) The pain she felt inside was more than she had ever felt. She loved Luke more than anyone or anything. (please get counselling illu im concerned)    She (oh god this is tHE WORST SENTENCE IN THE WHOLE THING) left a trail of tears (like the one native americans were murdered on hell yeah) as she walked. She said nothing. No sound could be heard but the sound of footsteps on the stone ground. The came to an arch. It was golden, studded with precision. The jewels glimmered.    Past and through the arch, sat a shadowy figure sat on a throne. Xalador, Illusien knew right away. This moment she had dreaded for so long was now happening.    She caught Luke’s gaze. She looked at him with longingness. (please)    "I’m sorry, Illusien.“

–

Finally the moment is here, the moment of my triumph. Xalador grinned. He would soon rule all.    He saw (weesnaw) them walk in. He felt another energy as strong as Illusien. Where was it coming from? (where tho)

—

Kish stood next to Lord Xalador. He looked at Illusien but he said nothing. Luke looked upon him hatefully.    Xalador sighed dreamfully.    "Thank you, Mikish, for making all this possible.” He saw Illusien’s gaze shift to Kish and back again.    Kish said nothing and just stood attentively.

—

Illusien directed her eyes in the direction of the shadowed Xalador. Why was he holding back his identity?    The moonlight was shining through the glass in the roof in the center of the room. They stopped under the light.    Illusien looked up, a full moon. Jesse and Malaki walked away to let them stand. Neither Luke or Illusien had enough courage to move at this point.    Suddenly, a familiar voice rang through the room.    "Well, well, well, this is Illusien? What a disgrace. A puny girl, what an opponent. But then again, looks are decieving.“ Illusien let out a laugh.    Xalador stood. He took a few steps. Then stopped.    "Mikish, follow me.” Mikish did so, obviously in fear for his life. Xalador resumed his leisurely walk. Growing closer and closer to Illusien. He finally stopped.    She could see his face. She then knew why he had hidden his identity.    "Hello, sister.“ A cold shimmery wave was sent down her spine.    "Hello, Alex.” The fear inside her was overtaken by her anger. Hot tears streamed down her face. “Tell me why.”

—

“You, that’s why. Ever since our birth you’ve been better at everything. That’s why when you passed through the arch, and you became the most powerful being on Glacitoria something had to be done. (he h8 u)    "So I created an army and moved into this abandoned caste, rightfully yours, of course. I sent Mikish after you,” Kish looked down in shame. “And sent men and trolls (TROLLS THO WHY TROLLS) after you. And now you are mine to dispose of.” He had a look of pure glee on his face. (the original shitlord)

—

Luke looked at Illusien. The truth was hard for her to grasp. He had never seen such a look on her face before. Fear had disappeared from her face and anger seared inside of her.    He had been silent for too long. He had been still too long. It was too much to bear.    "So you became a tyrant because your own flesh and blood–who would never do anything to hurt you–is a little better than you?“ (PREACH LUCANTHROS)  (wait i made that joke too early) He walked over to Illusien, "What guts that takes.” Luke grasped Illusien’s arms.    "Who’s the wimp?“ (nice)

—

(in parenthesis katie wrote: something about illusien remembering childhood here? GENIUS!!! nah tbh) Kish watched them. Illusien was soon to be dead and it would devastate him. He saw Xalador move closer. He could feel Illusien’s pulse quicken. Luke stood up to him, why couldn’t he?    He ran in front of Illusien. He blocked her the best he could.    "Kish, get out of the way,” Luke said.    "No,“ said Mikish.    "What are you doing?”    "Saving your life.“

—

Illusien was dumbstruck. There she was ready to die, when the reason she was here, decided to save her life.    "Get out of my way Mikish.”    "No.“ (thats so funny to me "do the dishes” “no” “get out my way” “no”) (“get out me car” “no” “get off me train” “i cant”)    "I will kill you too if I must.“    "Then do it.” Xalador grabbed Mikish at the base of his neck. Mikish struggled. The blue bolts of electricity that shot from Xalador’s hands were blinding. Illusien looked away. She heard a loud thump. She opened her eyes. There Kish was lying on the floor, pale, face down.    Dead. (im crying tbh im sorry im weak)    Suddenly he came after Illusien. Luke jumped in front of her. Xalador knocked him across the room.    "Luke!!“

– (this part is so stupid) There was darkness. It seemed to Luke there was no ground. The silence around him sent chills up and down his spine. A red crystal in the distance slowly crept toward him. The beating of a heart gradually getting louder: The crystal and the heart beat growing closer and closer.    Whispers:     LUCANTHROS. lucanthros LUCANTHROS (THATS WHAT LUKE IS SHORT FOR APPARENTLY GUYS. PLEASE BEAT ME UP) (katie wrote: "this is gay. no”)    Realize your strength, your power. Save her, let destiny take it’s path. Let fate decide this battle’s outcome. Do not leave her alone. Take your place as king. (shes right. its pretty homo and not in a good way)

(okay tbh im laughing because kish is way more powerful than all these fuckers. he should be king without illu bye)

—

Luke stood. Xalador had cornered Illusien. The anger seared from him. (illu you can fly and you have fire powers please do something. do not make this pussy save you) Xalador didn’t look away.    "Xalador, put her down.“    "Who are you to tell me what to do?”    "Lucanthros, and I’m ready to take back what’s mine.“    "Oh, ha, another being of ‘power’,” Xalador snickered. “It’s like having your cake and eating it too.” (plz explain what i meant to me)    Luke sent a bolt of flame at him. (A BOLT OF FLAME???? “zip ur lip like a padlock”) Xalador sent a blue jolt (looking for new words to use obviously. im digging in the trenches trying to create some variety up in this bitch) of electricity at him. This carried on, never touching. Illusien could do nothing she just sat there.( like a fucking pussy ass bitch will you plz get the fuck up and aCTUALLY DO SOMETHING YOURE ONLY THE MOST POWERFUL FUCKING THING ON THIS GODDAMN SHIT PLANET WILL YOU PLEASE FIGHT FOR ONCE) She stood to try and help. (FINALLY DUMB CUNT)    Malaki grabbed her from behind. (im so fucking done with this damsel nonsense. ive had it up to my meatballs.) Let alone watching this horrible fight she was now being held by an ugly moron.    She turned to face him.    "Malaki, put me down.“    "No” (NO PUNCTUATION. JUST NO)    "Okay then.“ She kicked him in the (dick plz say in the dick) knee (dammit) as hard as she could. He dropped to his knees. She punched him hard in the mouth (only really succeeding in nearly breaking her hand and getting her hand cut up by his teeth im sure) then grabbed his knife and stabbed him through the heart. (DO YOU KNOW HOW HARD IT IS TO STAB SOMEONE ILLU. ITS REALLY FUCKING HARD)    She wiped the blood on his shirt and grabbed the knife and pulled it out. Malaki’s breathing turned to gasps for air. Then he became silent.    Illusien turned. She thought back on what she had done. (it literally just happened. you need to) She shook it off. She had to help Luke. (HONEY YOU NEED TO HELP YOURSELF MAMA *demyx voice* RUN RUN AWAY)

—

Luke was dodging Xalador’s attacks the best he could. His strength was depleting. He sent one last blast at Xalador. He gasped for air. Xalador was closing in on him. Closer and closer yet. (kill him alex)    Xalador stopped. His eyes went blank. He fell limp to the floor. Malaki’s knife stuck out of his back. (thats it? literally that is so weak.YOU HAVE FUCKING FIRE POWERS. YOU GUYS COULD HAVE ROASTED HIS ASS LIKE CHARLIE SHEEN) Illusien wept into her hands. Luke ran over to comfort her.    "Why? I killed them, I killed them both.” (you are the worst character i have ever made) Illusien wept harder, “I spent all this time looking for him, and he just wanted to kill me.” (bitch you were not looking very carefully. you were busy wandering in the woods pointing out woodland creatures and trying to find the D where ever you could get it tbh. smh)    "I’m sorry. I just couldn’t bring myself to tell you.“ (BECAUSE YOU FUCKING KNEW THAT SHE WOULDNT BELIEVE YOU. AND IF SHE DID SHE WOULD NEVER HAVE FOLLOWED YOU, SHE WOULD HAVE NEVER FOUGHT HIM. SHE WOULD HAVE HIDDEN.) (ITS A FUCKED UP SITUATION LUKE BIRD)    "It’s alright. (IT IS NOT) I just can’t believe I killed him.” Luke put his arms around her. She opened her eyes. Kish!    She broke away from Luke. Kish, he was dead. (THATS ALSO A FUCKED UP SITUATION) She held him close to her. She let him down and sat there. Luke sat next to her. He took her hand.

— (I JUST ABOUT PISSED MY PANTS THIS PART IS WAY TOO FUNNY WHY) Jesse walked back into the room. He realized what he just missed. (like did he go get some popcorn??) There were three bodies on the floor. Only one of them was suppose to be dead. (…that means they were going to kill Kish anyway…thats really)    He grabbed his knife from his hip. He started on his way to Luke. Luke stood and caught his hand. (dude)    "What now, Jesse?“    "Why aren’t you dead?” (“cause we won duh”)    (this part please help me) “Cause I’m smart like that.” (i)    "Oh really? Well I’ll show you smart.“    "Stop Jesse you don’t know what you’re doing.” (that is the most monotone sentence)    "I know pretty damn (KATIE SCRIBBLED DAMN ALL THE WAY OUT) well what I’m doing. Taking care of the problem in my life!“ (jesse. this literally did not work half a second ago. chil l) Jesse dove at Luke, he dodged. (hes fuckin untouchable.) (SPEAKING OF WHICH I LITERALLY NEVER ELABORATED ON WHY MALAKI WAS COMPLETELY IMMUNE TO FIRE)    "Trust me you have no idea what your doing.”    "I know what I’m doing so just give up!“    "No.” (lmao)    "Fine, I’ll kill you both. And don’t argue with me. Since I’m the only one left, you’ll either (??/?) become my slaves (????? dude chill a sec) or die, your choice.“    "As welcoming as that sounds, no thank you. We don’t do evil.” Illusien said with a smirk. (bitch you gotta go.)    "No body asked you bitch.“ (WOW JESSUP I NEED TO WASH UR MOUTH OUT WITH SOAP) Jesse pointed at her. (ok what pointing going to do cause you cant do anything unless bitches asleep) Luke shot him an evil look.    "I’ll give you ten seconds to get out of here. As long as you stay in a hole and leave everyone alone, we won’t have a problem. 1, 2, 3…”    Jesse made a sour face. Then turned to leave (????? man you give up way too easy) but Luke grabbed him from behind. (incEST)    "I actually have a better idea.“

Chapter 10: Secret Emotions

(why did i write this chapter is actually the title) (jessup immediately makes me angry lmao) I can see why Luke loves her. You can see all of her emotions plainly. She’s beautiful and sees the good in people even when there is none. (NAME ONE INSTANCE PLEASE JESSUP) She even hesitated to killl Malaki (no she didnt) and Xalador when they only wanted to see her die slowly and painfully.    Of course she loves HIM. (she actually knows him better than you so yeah that acTUALLY MAKES MORE SENSE THAN HER LOVING YOU DUMB ASS) She would never love me. (cause you’ve been a little shit so far) How I envy Luke. And how did I end up here?! Seriously, the dungeon?    I hate Luke. He has everything I never could have. Including her. (you NEED TO TAKE A CHILL PILL AND RE-EVALUATE)

—

Illusien looked up at Luke. (she had literally been sucking his dick for like an hour. when was he going to finish) (im sorry) (SHE LOOKS AT HIM ALL THE TIME) She wanted to sleep and never wake up. She had killed two men. (wow) One of which had been her own brother. She looked at her hands. They were blood stained.    She didn’t feel like crying anymore. You know, she never even cared that much about Alex. (ARE YOU SURE?)  But still, even so, it was like killing herself inside. (emo narcoleptic furry) Malaki deserved what he got tho. (preach)    Jesse was in the dungeons. She was sort of glad Luke hadn’t killed him. (why) Sure she had killed Malaki and Xalador, but she had watched them and Kish die and she didn’t want to see anyone else.    "So I created an army and moved into this abandoned castle, rightfully yours of course,” she remembered that. Xalador had said that in his monologue. (BREAKING THE FOURTH WALL IM PISSING)    "So this castle is mine? Oh, I’m sorry ours?“ (im making a stinky face right now this is so unnecessary i did not sign up for this)    "Yes.  You can kick me out whenever you want…..” (plz stop)    She pushed him, “Shut up!” He laughed. (his laughter echoed through the halls. the dead bodies did not laugh.)    "Like I could ever get rid of you.“ She gave a playful smile.    "Oh and your highness, what do we do with the bodies?” (totally a question you ask in a playful, flirtatious manner.)    "Give them a proper burial, at least Kish anyway,“ she paused. "And don’t call me that!” (this is all katie get ready lmao) (this was written in the dark by the light of my alarm clock after my parents told us to go the fuck to sleep)    "Did you love him?“ (BUT DID YOU DIE?)    "I thought I did, but i could never love somebody who decieved me and lied straight to my face.”1    "He loved you, Illusien. Very much.  I could see it written all over his face everytime he looked at you.“    "I know I saw that too.”    "To be honest with you, I was worried. When I first rescued you, I could see the fear in your eyes when I told you Kish was an imposter. You didn’t want to believe me. (well duh) I saw the look in your eyes when I said his name. The same look as when you look at me now.“ (how quaint) (recycled love)    "It was hard for me but….”    "Let me finish please? (IMMA LET YOU FINISH BUT. KISH WAS THE BEST LOVER BOY OF ALL TIME. JS) The moment I saw you, I knew I loved you. (ew?) At first, I thought you wouldn’t love me back because of Kish. You thought you owed him something when in reality he owed you his life. (OH SO HE DESERVED TO DIE. THATS WHAT YOU JUST SAID. THIS IS SUCH A DICK CONVO) The day when you had flying lessons with me and you fell, he saw your face when I kissed you. Sorry, but your facial expressions give everything away. (get ready for a katie-ism) Your face is a whiteboard of emotions. (the fuck that mean) He realized what was happening and he resorted to anger.“    "I felt guilty because I kissed you in front of his eyes. He was so angry, it scared me.”    "It scared me too. I think the kiss is what drove him to tell Xalador where we were. I could see that he later regretted his decision. He hated me but couldn’t do anything about it. If he killed me, you would be in jeporady. (lmao) If he took you away from me, you would be taken to Lord Xalador. He was torn between you and Xalador. The only reason he served Xalador was so he could live. He only wanted to live, to see you. Kish was a complex person. (???) It was too bad that he misleaded you. But now I’m here to love and protect you (from nothing now lmao) and nothing can stop that.“ He looked at her. Her face was distorted with tears. (NOT A GOOD WORD TO USE WOW) She looked up at Luke.    "That was so sweet, Luke.” (NO IT WASNT)

—

Luke saw the tears in Illusien’s green eyes. He didn’t aim for this. Now was supposed to be a happy time for the both of them. (uh no its not.)    But now, he made Illusien cry. Come on stupid, think! he thought.    "I’m sorry Illusien. I didn’t mean to make you cry. I–I….“ she stopped him.    "Don’t be Luke.” He stopped talking. She seemed to bend reality with her beauty. (NOT A GOOD TIME FOR THIS) They stared into each other’s eyes for what seemed forever. (quit)    "May I Illusien?“ (may you what)    "Yes Luke”    And they kissed. (ew) Luke looked at Illusien’s face. All her emotions showed on her face. She was relaxed now. He held on to the back of her head. (THAT SOUNDS REALLY VIOLENT LIKE HES GRIPPING HER BY HER HAIR) She broke off as if she had remembered something.    "What about your brother, Jesse? (“I’m gonna make torture porn with him and sell it online”) Where is he going to go now?“ She looked worried. He wondered why.    "For all I care he can rot in the dungeon.”    "Well we have to go down to him.“    "Why?”    "Just because he is evil, doesn’t mean he doesn’t deserve any mercy. He is your brother after all.“    "That’s one thing I hate but, love about you, you can see the good in everyone, even my brother.”

—

Jesse was listening. He could hear every word they were saying.    "Well I choose to see good things and not bad,“ she said with a flip of her hair. Luke gave her a sly smile.    "Let’s at least check on him.”    "Fine.“ Jesse sat as if he knew nothing. (how do you do that) The door opened. Footsteps sounded.    "Okay, we’ve checked on him. Let’s go.”    "No, please, Luke, you promised.“    "Fine.”    They walked to him.    "How you doing Jesse?“    "Horrible.”    "So sorry,“ said Luke. "Let’s go please.”    "Stop nagging.“    "Jesse I’m very sorry your down here. But, it’s your ch–” Illusien grabbed Luke without turning around to pull him back. “–ildish actions that caused this.”    "Jesse, I really don’t want to talk to you at this moment,“ Luke let the words escape from his mouth.    "Too bad,” Jesse looked at Illusien, “I’m sorry, it’s just that I really think I can be good now (lmao me tbh) let me out?”    Illusien scooted closer to Luke. “Not on your life, sport.”

—

Luke put a protective arm around Illusien. She smiled up at him.    Oh come on, Jesse thought, do they have to do all this in front me? Are they just torturing me before they kill me? (me too jesse. me too)    "All right Luke, I’m going to look around the castle. You STAY HERE and TALK to your brother.“ Luke opened his mouth to say something.    "Please, Luke?” Illusien motioned to Luke to talk while she was gone. Without another word, she walked out of the room.    Jesse watched her go. (dat ass ma) So beautiful, he thought. Jesse was rammed against the wall. (howd luke get inside the cell) He looked at who rammed him. (cause it could be anyone else only bird man is there) Luke was holding him against the wall.    "Don’t get your hopes up, Jesse. Your heart will get broken faster than you can say 'I’m sorrry.’ (yes with 3 rs) Besides, Illusien is mine. I love her and she loves me. It’s odd. When we were growing up all the other girls liked you. (all the other girls had eyes, luke) But the one girl that actually matters likes me and NOT you.“ He paused a moment. "I wonder why.”    "I don’t care what you say,“ Jesse spat. "I can have anything and anyone I want. (katie really grossly mischaracterizes him) If they don’t cooperate, I’ll MAKE them. I’m far more powerful than Xalador ever was, and you know it.” (thats not true by a long shot sport)    "I know for a fact that if you had half of the brains he had, you would know that you can’t MAKE someone love you.“    "I can if I want to.”    "Well obviously you must NOT have the brains. Perhaps I judged you too fairly.“ (you simple)    "You know that this isn’t a game Luke. You can cheat. And I promise you if you play fair you’ll come in last.” Luke turned to go.   ��"And Luke, you might want to watch Illusien’s back. Just a fair warning.“ Luke started back toward Jesse but stopped himself. Luke shook his head and walked upstairs.

—

Illusien was worried. She had been heading downstairs when she had heard what Jesse said to Luke.    She quickly ran up the stairs. Luke came up soon afterwards.    "What’s the matter with you?”    "Nothing, its nothing!“    "It’s something. I know something’s wrong.”    "I’m just worried thats all. I’m going up to my room. I’m beat.“    "Your room?”    "Yeah it jas my name on it.“ She walked up stairs and turned the key in the lock. She took out the key and walked into the room.    It was beautiful, light blue walls were decked with tapestries. She saw the bed. She crawled in. She didn’t care what it felt like. She was bushed.

—

Luke turned down the corridor. He saw Illusien’s room. He reached to turn the door knob, but then changed his mind. He walked to the next corridor. Another room sat. He opened the door. He saw Illusien sleeping. (????????????????????????????????)    He closed the door lightly and went down the next corridor and finally found an empty room.    Once he got in, he sat on the bed and lit the candle besides the bed. He buried his head in his hands. What was he going to do about Jesse? What if he carried out his threat?    Illusien must have heard him. She sounded worried. Then again she had a pretty hard day.    He blew out the candle and went to sleep.

—

Illusien sat at Kish’s grave. She was silent. Luke came and sat next to her and put his arm around her.    "Thank you , Kish. You brought her to me, and now she’s safe. You finally got it right.”