Tumgik
#i can't get over this ad campaign
tmrwds · 5 months
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Local clown buys 29€ earbuds from DNA for a piece of silly paper
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coolspacequips · 8 months
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Gotta say I didn't even notice the fucked up clowns being an ad and just kept scrolling past him bc sometimes Tumblr just gets obsessed w some fuck ass ugly clown man I've got to keep scrolling past, anyway, so I fully didn't even register that I was seeing an ad.
I started seeing text posts about it and I didn't even realize what they were talking about till like the 3rd one, which is also how I learn the name of whatever tragically uninteresting man everyone is thirsting over that I'm gonna have to block that month LMAO
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carolmunson · 7 months
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the cars that go boom | (daddydom!sadist!eddie)
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this fic isn't related to the title song reference at all, it's just stuck in my head. needed to get this out of my drafts so here's some ddlg themed sadist eddie that's been sitting in my draft folder for fucking ever and i'm sick of looking at it. tw: 18+ mdni ddlg dynamics, daddy kink, eddie being all over a cocky shit bag hottie who likes control but it's consensual, use of a vibrating toy. lots of allusions to other sex.
You watch him get out of the bathroom after his shower, tattoos stretched taught over softly cut muscles. You almost drool. He tried something new with you this week, an orgasm ban -- nearly a sex ban -- in fact, he didn't even want you to see his dick. And much like he always does when he finds a new way to torture you; he was feeling really pleased with himself about it.
'That's more than you deserve,' he hissed at you Monday night while you knelt obediently between his legs. He pet your hair while you watched TV and he jerked himself off, you were not allowed to turn around until he was finished. You pouted all night, and when it happened the next day you started pouting all week. But, the week was over, which meant your punishment was done. You'd spent all day getting ready, a long shower, smooth skin, body butter, his favorite perfume, everything you could do to feel perfect for him. You cleaned the trailer and made dinner, you kissed him when he got in the door to which he blushed and smiled.
'Hi beautiful,' he greeted you so gently, 'I missed you today.'
You watch him dress now, hair dripping while he tugs on a pair of grey sweatpants and a ratty cut off Iron Maiden t-shirt. You sulk a little. Those aren't normally the clothes he'd put on if he wanted to take you to bed, but you don't say anything just yet.
He goes to the kitchen table with a composition notebook and a collection of pens and markers, opening the beat up pages to what you can only assume is a new campaign, a new drawing of a map. You walk over while he mulls over it, adding new territory, scribbling in new lore. You let your hands slide over his shoulders.
"Hi baby," you say sweetly.
"Hi," he responds, focused on his notebook. Your hands slide forward, onto his chest, your face leaning down to his, pressing a kiss to his cheek.
"Whatcha doing?" you ask innocently.
"Workin' on a campaign," he responds, "We're gonna meet up on Wednesday night so I want it to be semi together."
"Okay," you nod, you run your fingers gently over his scalp, giving him a soft scratch. He keens into the touch, shoulders relaxing while he rolls his head back. You press your luck, letting your fingertip trace over the curve of his ear.
"Hey," he warns softly, "I'm tryin' to focus, sweetheart."
"Oh, I'm sorry," you apologize, but he can't see your grin. Your fingers continue to wander, giving him a sweet shoulder massage while he reads over his story. A quiet 'thank you honey', falls from his full lips while you work out the knots. You press your luck again, trailing your finger down the line of his neck that's the most sensitive to your tongue and touch. Eddie's shoulders tense and he sits up straight, turning to you with a sour pull at his full lips.
"Do you need something?" he asks pointedly. You feel heat rush to your cheeks, "Do you need some attention?"
You nod and he grins, pulling the other kitchen chair over, "Come sit next to me then, you can help."
You roll your eyes and sit down next to him, he bites his tongue at the offense, happy to get to spend some time with you like this. He gives you a chaste kiss on your cheek while you watch him work.
You barely 'help', just sitting there while he crosses things out and re-writes them. While he flips back ten pages and then forward twenty, grabbing a red pencil and putting it down for a blue pencil then picking the red back up and so on. You get restless watching him work, so you get up and grab each of you a beer. Another sugar sweet, 'thaaank you baby,' pours from him, this time deep and focused, dark and syrupy. Molasses tongue. It goes right to your thighs.
You press your luck a third time, scooting close to him, letting your hand smooth over his covered thigh and further up, skimming over his cock that was perfectly outlined in his sweats. He let's out a frustrated sigh when he takes your hand away from his crotch, gently putting it on your lap when he looks at you sternly.
"Daddy's busy, baby," his eyes look down at you, his dominance brewing under angry brows, "Why don't you go play by yourself in another room, hm?"
He turns his attention back to the campaign notebook, while you throb from being scolded. The humilation pools through you when he chastises you, eyes lingering on you while you continue to sit there. After a beat, you get up to walk to the bedroom hearing his voice as you do.
"Good girl," he teases, "Are you being a good listener?"
You look back and see his grin while he leans back in the kitchen chair, crossing his arms. His legs are spread wide under the table, cool authority flowing off of him.
"Are you?" he asks again, a smirk cracking his face as if to ask, 'Does this embarrass you?' It does, it's humiliating.
"I'm a very good listener," you respond quietly, heart dropping in your chest.
His brows raise, waiting for you to add more to the sentence. You let out an aggravated huff through your nose, crossing your arms.
"I'm a very good listener, daddy," you repeat.
"There we go," he smiles cruelly, "Go have fun, sweetheart."
'Have fun? HAVE FUN?' you think to yourself while you go to the bedroom and shut the door with a firm click, 'Fine! I'll have fun without you then! See if I care!' It's not fair that you've been quite literally begging to be fucked for seven straight days, but to go straight into teasing you like this? The type of dominance that makes you feel the most -- god -- embarrassed? Degraded? You'd rather gag on fingers and have him wipe your spit on your face. You'd rather him make you lick someone's cum out of his ass, literally anything but this.
With a huff you open Eddie's top dresser drawer and grab the Hitatchi he bought you as an anniversary gift last year. Hastily, you plug it in behind the bedside table before climbing on to bed, shimmying your jeans off and tossing them to the floor.
Your legs spread, bent at the knees, turning the toy on low and slowly lowering it onto your covered core. The hum is quiet, barely a tremble in the head of the wand when it meets the lacy fabric of your panties. A soft gasp escapes you at the feeling, it had felt like years since you'd been touched there. You move the toy up and down slowly, teasing yourself, little puffs of breath escaping you as you do.
With a click, the buzz intensifies, sliding the head upward to settle softly on your clothed clit. You whimper while your hips start to move slowly against the vibrations, the whirr of the toy filling your ears while your eyes shut. You keep yourself like this for a little, enjoying the slow sensation, the mild tease. You feel it start, like the hook looping into the first car of a roller coaster train, the first tug when the attendant hits 'go'.
“Huh!” you gasp out breathy while your hips twitch. Your lower lips start to swell against the gusset of your bottoms, slick building between them. A slow start. You savor it, a small smile pulling at your lips.
“Look so pretty like that, baby,” you hear his voice and gasp, tossing the toy next to you and snapping your legs shut. He smirks, a devilish chuckle bubbles from his chest, “Oh no, don’t let me interrupt. I said you could go play by yourself, and look at you…”
His voice raises in a lilt, while he sits on the bed. He passes you the wand and smiles, “You’re being such a good girl for me.”
“Go on,” he says with a nod, “Show daddy how you were playing.” You lean back on the pillows, opening up your legs again slowly. He glances between them, eyes flitting down to your mound briefly before meeting your eyes again, he subconciously licks his lips. You keep your legs up and bent up against your chest so he has a view, puffing out a soft sigh when you click the toy on again. He looks at you with a hazy gleam in his brown eyes, nodding slowly at you to remind you of his permission. You run it up your thigh before settling it back down on the center of your slit, letting the vibrations pulse over your entire core. "Hm," you hum out softly as your brows pinch together in a tilt. "Aw, yeah?" he coos out, "Does that feel good?"
"Mhm," you whine, lower lip tucked tight between your teeth. Yuo swallow when he reaches his hand out, smoothing over the soft plushness of your inner thigh. He squeezes, grinning when you let out a soft grunt with a twitch of your hips.
"You've been so patient this week," he purrs, "Such a good girl. Isn't that right?"
You nod hurriedly, watching his hand slide up your thigh, his index finger tracing up the hem of your underwear. It's a smooth hand off, watching his rings gleam in the bedside lamp when it wraps around the handle, both of your hands falling flat by your head. Your palms face the ceiling, matching your eyes when he turns up the vibrations. "Isn't that right, baby doll?" he asks, adding a gentle pressure up against you. Your pussy strains against the fabric the more excited you get, back already in a soft arch while you push into the mattress. "Y-yes, sir," you manage to mutter out. "No, no, that's not who I am tonight," he admonishes, still in a soft and steady voice, almost sweet -- like you don't understand anything. He takes the toy away; making you whimper, leaning up on your elbows behind you.
"You know how to address me," he says, a serpentine confidence flashing in his face, "You're a big girl, aren't you? Or do I have to teach you?"
You let out a shrill groan, head leaning back on it's hinge while your legs kick out in frustration in front of you.
"Hmm, of course," he says, getting up off the bed to pull off his shirt and slide off his sweats. His boxer briefs hug him in tight but it's there and it's missed you more than you've missed it this week, "You act like this and you don't think I should treat you like a little girl?"
You look up at him, bitten lower lip jutting out with a sheen of spit.
"So pouty, too," he coos, crawling onto the mattress between your parted thighs. He sits up on his knees, tall over your frame splayed out on the bed. He lifts one of your legs, pressing it flush against his chest so your foot rests by his ear.
"M'not pouty," you say back while his other hand reaches over your cheek with a light back before splaying over your jaw. His thumb brushes your lower lip before pressing on the dip at the center.
"Open," he instructs, you don't even think to stop yourself. You suck his thumb slow, letting your tongue lave over the length all the while. Spit fills your mouth, wet and eager, already inching at the corners of your mouth. You might as well drool. "Very good," he purrs again from the back of his throat, "Someone learned her lesson this week."
You nod, taking his wrist to steady his hand while you take more initiative with his thumb, implying what you really want.
"Don't get too ahead of yourself," he says lowly, taking his thumb from your mouth. He wipes the spit on your cheek before reaching back over to the wand, keeping your legs spread and holding thight to your thigh against his front.
Your hips shimmy when he holds the toy back in place, thumb running over the power button but not pressing down.
"Hey," he says, commanding, "Look up at me."
Your gaze snaps to his in unadulterated obedience, his distaste for even having to ask evident on his face, "You know better."
"I know better," you nod while you say it, confirming his words. "You do not ever stop looking at me," he glowers down.
"I don't ever stop looking at you," you repeat back, needy for whatever he has for you next. Your hips shimmy again, you try to stifle the whine in your throat but it comes out just the same; desperate and childish. "Oh, baby, do you need help asking for what you want?" his voice lilts, "Does daddy have to guess?" "Turn it on, please," you whisper. "Please what, princess?" he asks, voice mocking with a knowing stare, leaning down so your knee hooks over his shoulder. His chest hovers at an angle over you, chain and guitar pick dangling over your lips. "Please what?" he asks again. "Please daddy," you whine, "Please turn the toy on." "Look at those manners," he grins wickedly, "My sweet girl."
He turns it on, speed setting high with the flick of his finger. It rumbles loud, thighs already twitching while runs it back and forth over your sensitive clit. "Fuck," you gasp out, eyes rolling, "Oh my god, right there." "That's not a very nice word, sweetheart," he chastises, "What do you say?"
"S-sorr-Oh! Oh my god! Oh! -- Sorry, d--shitshitshitshit-- sorrysorrysorrysorry," you nearly cry when the cord in your belly snaps, gushing into the fabric against your core. He greedily keeps your thighs apart, watching while you come undone under him. You gulp when he doesn't take the toy away, your sensitive nerves screaming at the buzz of the vibrator. Your hips writhe and jump, trying to pull away from it all the while he's shaking his head no.
"Gotta hear that apology, princess," he murmurs, "Say sorry."
"Sorry daddy, I'm sorry," you babble out, "M'sorry I'll be so good, I'll be good." He let's out a satisfied hum, clicking the wand off and placing it gingerly on the bedside table. His hand lingers for a moment to make sure it doesn't roll off and then finds it's footing back on the mattress.
"You'll be so good?"
"So good," you nod when he settles back between your thighs. He crawls forward like a cat, pressing his hips slowly up against yours. You sigh needily when you feel the drag of his erection against you, whimpering when you see it affect him the same way. "Shit, baby," he smirks, trying not to break character while he grinds against you a second time, "Fuck." "That's not a very nice word," you tease back, looking up at him through heavy lids. "Well I'm not a very nice guy, am I?" he muses, leaning in to kiss you deeply before one hand reaches down to tug at your panties. You giggle, a sound that sends him reeling when he's in this kind of mood. "You're very nice," you whisper against his lips. "Hmm, yeah?" he growls, noses brushing while he lingers above you. He offers another roll of his hips right before he gets to work on pulling your panties down slipping them off of each ankle with ease. Undressed completely below him, he admires you. He hadn't seen you like this all week, finally getting what you've been waiting for. So patient, so willing. He runs his hands from shoulders to hips, greedy fingers digging into you rough and tumble, grabbing and kneading with disregard to comfort. "Daddy," you start, getting his attention in a voice that makes him ready to serve accordingly, "Fuck me."
A smirk splits his face, it's cute when you ask so brazenly when you're busy looking at him with those sad puppy eyes. "Please, fuck me," you reiterate while he readies himself, boxer briefs peeling off to leave him bare. Your soft gasp at the release of his cock is more of an ego trip than he expected to have, never realizing how much you truly need him like this. How you can really only get off to him, how you've submitted in every way you could. "Daddy's gonna fuck you, sweetheart," he says steadily, climbing back ontop of you, pressing your thighs to your chest, "God, m'gonna fuck you real good."
He leans in for another hungry kiss, ownership laced in his lips. When he breaks away you catch his chin in your hand, an action that makes him bristle, jaw clenching at your attempt at control.
"Fuck me like I've been bad," you request in a timbre so low he nearly melts at the sound, "Fuck me how you fuck bad girls."
He's never flipped you over so fast in your life.
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russellsppttemplates · 2 months
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I'm always over the moon (Lando Norris)
A look into your and Lando's little life moments
Note: english is not my first language. It's fluffy, so you know I pratically melted (and am now feeling single in about seventeen different levels)✨️
Thank you so much to everyone who likes and reblogs, your feedback is appreciated 🤍 and I'm taking requests so if you have any ideas or concepts you want to share, feel free to do so as I'll try to get to them the best I can!
my masterlist
Tw: mentions accident drop of a glass and possibility of injury
Tag list: @myloverjk-blog
Today's training session was particularly hard, Jon having Lando run a considerable amount of kilometres more than the usual distance followed by a weights session. By the time he was finished his cryotherapy session, he was more than ready to go home and snuggle up to you in the sofa.
Setting his keys on the little bowl by the door, Lando left his shoes on the coat cabinet by the door before walking to the ensuite bathroom where he heard noise from.
"I'm home, baby", he said, crossing the corner and resting his body on the side of the door, watching you rub product on your face.
"Hey, Lan", you smiled at him through the mirror, putting the lid on the pot you were using and storing it away.
Approaching him, you laced your arms around his neck, fingers playing with the curls ay the nape of his neck, "how was your session?", you wondered before kissing his lips.
"It was a killer, Jon set out to push me to the limit today", he hummed, hands finding your waist and holding your body close to his, "and you?", he checked.
"I worked all day, finally finished the prototypes for the next Quadrant campaign, then I worked out and I was just finishing my shower when you arrived", you added.
"I should've come home earlier, I could have joined you in there", he smirked, lowering his head to your neck and kissing the skin softly, earning your giggles as you squirmed.
"You're tickling me", you smiled, curling yourself closer against him, "but it's alright, baby, we'll do it another time".
When you separated yourself from his slightly, Lando noticed what you were wearing, "ugh, baby, I don't know what would be better, getting home when you were in the shower or this", he complimented.
"What do you mean?", you scrunched your eyebrows, looking down at your outfit. Because you had moisturised your whole body, from head to toe, after your workout, you decided to put on your tiny pyjamas shorts and one of Lando's t-shirts, the bottom piece fitting your thighs loosely while his t-shirt fit snug on your hips and chest, the fabric leaving little to the imagination. Even though he knew everything it kept away, he loved the way your curvilinear body looked in his t-shirt.
"I love it when you wear my clothes, they look so good on you, too god even", he nibbled on your ear lobe, hands tapping your thighs so you knew to jump and wrap your legs around his waist.
"I thought you were too tired, baby", you brushed the curls away from his eyes, "I am, but that doesn't mean I won't spend the evening glued to you", he winked, carrying you to the sofa in the living room, laying you both down and wrapping you both in a blanket.
"Can't have you feeling cold, baby", he mumbled, fixing the blanket before his hand travelled under the t-shirt and settled on your tummy, making you hum in content, "I love you, baby", you cooed.
.
"Alright, let's get to work!", Lando clapped after setting the last box on the living room floor.
When you moved all of the things you wanted to Monaco, Lando insisted you should bring your favourite books, reasoning that the apartment should also have some of your things instead of just his helmets for decoration. So, three boxes were shipped with your favourite book collections and stand alones and, you and Lando took the afternoon to organise them.
"I get this can be boring for you, Lan, I can do it myself if you want to go stream or just game", you added, kissing his cheek lovingly.
"Absolutely not, baby, I want to help you! So, how do you want this?", he asked as he looked at what was in the boxes, "do you want to do this by colour? Genre? Date? The ones you've read and the ones you haven't read yet", he suggested.
"We can go a bit with the colour schemes you already have with the helmets", you tried, looking over at the colour palette the books made up.
Wiping the shelves one last time, you sat on the floor and handed the books over to your boyfriend, guiding him through the order and way you wanted to display them.
"Oh, I remember this one - I read it to you the first time I spent the night at your place! You didn't want to seem weird and admit you needed to read a little before going to bed and thought you could go without it for one night!", he smiled at the memory, "Little did you know that it was another one of the things that attracted me to you and I was more than happy to read to you", he winked, leaving you flustered as you handed him the next book, "very smooth, Mr. Norris", you blushed.
"I like to keep you on your toes", he chuckled, "next, there's room for that big collection there", he pointed to the eight books that shared the same design, "might be a tight squeeze, but I think it's fine", he muttered as you handed him the books.
By the time you finished, the living room looked like a good mixture of you and Lando. The books added a pop of colour and softer tone along with the new picture frames you scattered.
"It looks great", Lando said, pulling you closer to him as he wrapped his arm around your shoulder, "our home is coming together nicely", he kissed the side of your head.
.
"They can spend the day, of course I don't mind", you smiled as you out the cutlery away in the drawer.
"It's your home too, baby, just wanted to make sure you're fine with it", Lando reasoned as he wiped the counter.
It was still weird to refer to the apartment as your home, but you wouldn't have it any other way. Closing the door and moving to the cups drying on the counter, you grabbed a tea towell and started drying them before setting them in the cupboard.
"I'll make sure to not make too much noise, or I can go and work at the café down the street, it's - shoot!", you cursed as the glass slipped from your hold, falling on the floor and shattering into little pieces.
"Careful, darling, you might hurt yourself more", Lando urged, stretching his arms and helping you stand where there were no glass shards.
"I'm sorry, I thought the towell wasn't that slippery", you said as Lando scanned your hands for any cuts or injuries, moving to your feet and ankles.
"It's okay, baby, I don't care about the glass, I care about you", he kissed your fingers, "there's a little graze here", he pointed to the small nick on your skin, "go wash it off while gather these", he kissed your cheek and looked for the broom.
Making sure he had sweeped all of it and then passing the vacuum cleaner just to make sure, Lando finished putting the glasses away as you stood by the door, "it's fine,Y/N, we'll go to IKEA and get a new one", he conforted, "now, are we ready for bed?", he wondered as he held your hand as you walked to the bedroom.
.
"My shoulders are killing me, I think I slept funny", you mumbled, trying to find a good position against the office chair, Lando's look questioning your movements.
"Are you in pain? You should've said something", he tutted, hands coming to rub the muscles along your shoulders and neck as Ria went over the latest filming plans.
"Y/N, are you okay, girl?", Ria asked, concerned at the faces you were pulling, "are you sure he's helping you rather than making it worse?", she teased.
"Hey!", Lando yelled, "I'm trying to be a great boyfriend, making sure she's feeling well and taken care of! I think that's jealousy", he smirked, poking his tongue out at her.
"It's feeling good, handsome, especially right there", you groaned, earning a whistle from Max.
"If you guys need a room, I'm sure they can find something relatively kept away!", he laughed, luckily missing the pillow your boyfriend threw at him, "no need to resort to violence, guys!".
"Bring that pillow over here, please, I actually need it", you asked him, taking it from his hands as he quickly walked away, "what, are you afraid I was going to make you trip?", you giggled.
"I don't know, the two of you are never up to any good!", Max raised his hands in defense as Lando kissed your forehead, "He's just jealous because we're a great team and P isn't here with him".
.
Weekends with no racing and no plans quickly became your favourite because you were able to spend as much time as you possibly could with Lando, the triple header ahead of you already promising to make spending time just with him on your own a bit difficult.
When Lando woke up like clockwork, he stretched his neck just enough to watch you sleep cuddled up to his side, your hand grabbing a handful of the sheets that were keeping you warm as you peacefully slept, and knowing how much Quadrant had kept you up late that past week, he thought it would be nice to let you sleep for a bit longer.
Carefully getting up to not wake you up, Lando kissed your cheek soflty and made his side of the bed, tucking the sheets around your body as he lightly kissed your head one last time before he went to the ensuite to change into his workout clothes.
Heading to the kitchen, Lando filled his water bottle and grabbed a pre-workout snack to take to the home gym. Looking at the equipment in the room and the cardio indications Jon had sent him, he decided that he was going on the bike, figuring that, even though the sound isolation was pretty good, it would be the least likely to make too much noise to the point of waking you up, following up with some weights and then stretching.
He was all sweaty when he walked back into the bedroom, ready to have a shower when he heard the sheets ruffling, "hey, baby, good morning", he smiled, "you can go back to sleep, I just need to take a shower, I'm sorry I woke you up", he pouted.
"Morning", you yawned, "I'm going to shower with you", you smiled sleepily, getting up and joining him in the ensuite.
Leaving your clothes in a pile on the floor, Lando got the shower started, making sure the water was warm as you both liked before stepping in with you, letting the water wash away before you grabbed your shower gel, lathering it on Lando's hands and then on yours as you both helped the other wash off, stealing kissing and caresses along the way.
When you got back to the bedroom and dressed in lounge wear clothes, you were ready to have breakfast, finding the overnight oats in the kitchen, "I don't mind if you want to eat something else", Lando offered.
"These are good, I don't mind it", you said, "but I am going to make my latte because my brain can't go without the caffeine", you scrunched up your nose, earning his giggles as you turned on the coffee machine.
"Can I have a little sip, please?", Lando asked once you frothed up the milk, "of course, here baby", you encouraged, bringing the mug up to his lips and having your hand form a shell under it just in case it spilled.
Lando was left with a little foam moustache, earning a giggle from you as you kissed him, "my little frothy man", you cupped his cheek before kissing him properly, "I love you, Y/N", he whispered, pulling you into his embrace.
.
"You pick the movie, I have to go pee", you said to your boyfriend, letting him walk inside the living room as you continued down the hall to the bathroom.
For tonight's plan, you and Lando decided to stay in and cook together, wanting to enjoy the small task without rushing or heating up something from his meal plan, still making something healthy and approved by his team.
When you got back to the living room,
Lando had his Spotify app on the TV, a slow song you recognised from his brother's wedding playlist ready to play, "would you do me the honour of joining me in this dance?", he asked, kissing your knuckles before looking up at you, eyes sparkly as you replied, "yes, I will", you smiled, allowing him to push you flush to his chest, slowdancing in the living room once he started the song, your head in his chest listening to his steady heartbeat.
"Everyday I thank my lucky starts that we met, that I was bold enough to ask you out and that you've stayed with me all of these years", he broke the silence as he unattached his lips from your temple, "and I never want to loose this, little touches, giggles, wins and losses, all of it", he smiled.
"You're the best thing that has happened to me, Lando", you cupped his face in your hands, thumbs brushing his cheeks as he smiled, "I can only hope you feel as happy as I do when I'm with you".
"Darling, with you, I'm always over the moon", he giggled, kissing your lips softly as he stumbled you two into the sofa, roaming hands and tongues battling eachother as a night of love and passion unfolded.
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askmrtorgue · 10 months
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HEY! YOU THERE! WANT TO PLAY A TABLETOP ADVENTURE WITH A PROFESSIONAL STORYTELLER?
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I'M MISTER TORGUE, AND THE NERD WHO HELPS ME LOG INTO THIS ACCOUNT ASKED ME TO DO AN AD FOR HIS SERVICES. I TOLD HIM I WOULD, BUT ONLY IF I GOT TO WRITE IT MYSELF. SO STRAP IN, DUMPSUCKS. IT'S PRODUCT PLACEMENT TIME:
--
DO YOU WANT TO PLAY DUNGEONS & DRAGONS BUT YOU CAN'T FIND SOMEONE TO RUN YOUR GAMES?
ARE YOU FED UP WITH A GAME MASTER WHO WON'T LET YOU STRAIGHT-UP MAKE OUT WITH THE VILLAINS OF THEIR STORY?
DO YOU WANT WANT TO LEARN TABLETOP RPGS BUT EVERYONE WHO TRIES TO EXPLAIN IT USES THINGS LIKE MATH AND SPREADSHEETS AND YOU CAN'T STOP THEM BECAUSE FATAL SUPLEXES ARE ILLEGAL ON YOUR PLANET?
THEN YOU NEED BENCOMPETENCE, PROFESSIONAL STORYTELLER AND GAME MASTER.
BRAOOWWWWW-CHICKABRAOW EXPLOSION NOISE HEREEEEEEEE!
BENCOMPETENCE HAS RUN OVER 100 PROFESSIONAL GAMES OF TABLETOP GAMES, INCLUDING DUNGEONS & DRAGONS, CITY OF MIST AND MORE. HE HAS 100% POSITIVE REVIEWS FROM HIS CLIENTS, WHICH IS PROBABLY MORE THAN 34%.
NOT ONLY DOES BEN OWN A PAIR OF CAT-EAR HEADPHONES, HE EXCELS AT RIPPING YOUR HEART STRAIGHT OUT OF ITS RIBCAGE USING NOTHING BUT COMPELLING, ROMANCEABLE CHARACTERS AND BADASS EPIC ADVENTURES. IN FACT, EVEN HIS VILLAINS ARE SEXY AS F*CK. JUST CHECK OUT THIS VAMPIRE FROM ONE OF HIS CAMPAIGNS:
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THIS DEATH DADDY IS ABSOLUTELY ABOUT TO KILL ME AND I DON'T GIVEN EVEN A SINGLE F*CK.
NOT YOUR STYLE? NO PROBLEM, PLAYER, HE ALSO OFFERS TERRIFYING MURDER MOMMIES!
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THIS WOMAN COULD DRINK MY BLOOD AND I WOULD SAY "THANK YOU"
WANT TO GET EVEN MORE NUTS!? HOW ABOUT BEING A SH*TLOAD OF PIRATES THAT FIGHT MINDFLAYERS AND TENTACLE BEASTS!?
OR MAYBE EVEN ROMANCES THE TENTACLES BEAST?? I DON'T JUDGE
YOU DO YOU!!
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THERE IS A 4% CHANCE THIS TENTACLED ABOMINATION WILL CUDDLE ME AND NOT EAT MY BRAINS AND I LIKE THOSE ODDS!!!
BENCOMPETENCE'S GAMES ARE INCLUSIVE AF AND BEGINNER-FRIENDLY, BECAUSE GATEKEEPING IS FOR SH*THEELS AND TRASHGUZZLERS. WHETHER YOU'RE BRAND NEW OR HAVE PLAYED A QUILLION SESSIONS, YOU WILL BE RIGHT AT HOME. ALL THAT MATTERS IS THAT YOU GET IN THERE AND KICK THE NARRATIVE'S ASS RIGHT IN ITS D*CK.
HE ALSO ASKED ME TO TELL YOU THAT SESSION 0'S ARE FREE, AND I HAVE NO IDEA WHAT THAT MEANS!
WANT TO JOIN A TABLE? THEN LISTEN UP, F*CKTRUCKS, BECAUSE IT'S LIST TIME:
FIGHT OR MAYBE MAKE OUT WITH HOT EVIL VAMPIRES IN CURSE OF STRAHD (NOW AVAILABLE IN DEATH DADDY AND MURDER MOMMY)
I AM NOW STARING AT THE VAMPIRE AGAIN AND FORGOT THE NEXT BULLET POINT
JOIN CALL FROM THE DEEP , BE PIRATES, AND BLOW UP THE ENTIRE F*CKING OCEAN!!! AGAIN!!!!!!!
SOMETHING ABOUT LEARNING TABLETOP RPGS FOR THE FIRST TIME IN A DISCOUNTED SESSION
THERE'S A LOT MORE TO SAY, BUT THE NERD WRITING THIS SCRIPT STARTED TALKING ABOUT CHARACTER SHEETS AND SOMETHING CALLED NARRATIVE AGENCY, SO I HAD TO BEAT HIM WITH A FOLDING CHAIR UNTIL HE STOPPED. YOU CAN HELP PAY FOR THE BODYCAST I PUT HIM IN BY SIGNING UP TODAY!
END OF ADVERTISEMENT.
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doberbutts · 3 months
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We have a little free pantry in our front yard (toothbrushes, tampons, shelf-stable snacks bottled water, etc.), and I read a lot about people's experiences having one online before we put ours up re: expectations about potential interactions with people using it, but nothing prepared me for how weirdly aggro *other* people sometimes get about us having it as a form of "activism" as opposed to some other, more nebulous idea of broader social change. "Don't you think it'd be better to volunteer at or donate money to a homeless shelter, so those people can get the actual help they need?" "Shouldn't you focus more on trying to campaign for policy changes that will help more people than one street corner if you care about this problem?" "Isn't doing that a waste of time?" "Aren't you just encouraging people not to get help?" I do that other stuff when I can. This is something small I can do - in addition to raising awareness and fighting for bigger change, when I have the time and money and spoons - and at least, when I don't. It's crazy to me to approach social justice issues with such an all-or-nothing mindset as some people seem to. I've met enough of the individuals who utilize it to know it makes a difference in a very tangible way for the people directly around me.
No, I agree entirely.
Corny and dated as it is, there's a reason the saying is "be the change you want to see". If no one within the community puts in the work to fix the community's problems, even in little bits and pieces, then how will anything change? Raising awareness only goes so far. What happens when all anyone is, is aware? Aware, and still doing nothing, waiting for someone else to put in the work.
Sometimes, that someone is going to need to be you. You can't just wait around and wait for someone else to do it for you.
If I see someone digging through the trash for food, I wave them over and offer them food from my house or fresh food from a store or take them to a restaurant where they can order whatever they want. If I'm getting groceries and I see someone very obviously homeless struggling to pay for their food, I tell the cashier to add it to my bill. No one starves in front of me. Ever since I stopped needing to rely on food stamps, no one starves in front of me.
This past summer I saw someone splayed out on the sidewalk in 95F weather in direct sunlight. I couldn't tell if he was unconscious from drugs or passed out from the heat or just simply had fallen asleep in the shade and then the sun moved. I was getting groceries so I added a bunch of hot chicken to my order plus several bottles of refrigerated water. I went over to him and woke him and explained that I was worried he needed medical attention. He'd passed out because he was tired, he told me. I offered him the hot food and the water and he thanked me, telling me he'd run out of water the night before and food the day before that and didn't have any money to get any more.
Everyone else had been walking around him like he was just an obstacle on the sidewalk. No one had thought to offer any help. When I walked away, some folks who saw me told me that that was very nice of me. I don't think it was nice of me. I think that's just what you should do if you see someone obviously in distress. They agreed that he seemed like he needed the help. They didn't act. They agreed that the compassionate and right thing to do was to offer assistance and make sure he was okay. But they didn't do it. They waited for someone else to do it.
I've mentioned in passing that I volunteer for the local teen LGBT club, helping lost gay kids find their way and maybe not kill themselves about it. It's not much. I mostly just text back and forth with whatever kids get my number from the adults that run the thing. Sometimes I give them tips and advice. Sometimes I'm just the cool gay uncle they tell about their latest school drama. Once or twice I've served one of them lunch on my couch while my dogs smother them with affection and they cry about their latest heartbreak. I don't do speeches or history lessons or anything like that. I don't think I'm qualified for it, in honesty. But if even one of them doesn't commit suicide, if even one of them doesn't self-harm, if even one of them no longer feels all alone in the world because I'm there when they reach out to me, that's enough.
Today on my commute to work, the guy in front of me had a major wipeout on his motorcycle. I stopped my car in a position that none of the other cars could hit him, and asked if he was okay, and waited until his friend (also on a motorcycle) had circled back around to help him off the road and check him over. I left once his friend waved me away. I offered to call an ambulance but he refused.
A couple weeks ago, also on my commute, a woman was stopped on the side of the road, waving her arms at drivers, shouting for help. I stopped. The other drivers didn't. Her car had died, she was new to town, and she was somewhere that notoriously doesn't get cell service. I helped her call a tow truck. It wasn't a trap. She didn't want to hitchhike. She just was stuck and panicked about it.
I stop and help animals get off the road. I've lost count on how many turtles I've carried to the other side. I helped my neighbor search for a dog he saw get hit by a car so he could take it to the vet. I shoveled my elderly neighbor's driveway for her, and talked my boss into giving her a major discount for her little dog's dental in which pretty much every tooth needed extraction or he would die. When I still lived in that rental with my roommates, we were surrounded by kids. Every kid on the block knew we were a safe house to go to. If they needed food or water, if they needed entertainment, if they needed just somewhere to be, they could be at our place. When covid started, I did a "reverse halloween" since Halloween was canceled, and I put bags of candy on every doorstep that I knew had kids inside. I've done a "neighborhood santa" putting a small toy plus a small gift card for the parents on every doorstep that has kids, for as long as I've lived around kids.
When I say activism requires action, I don't mean that every single person is required to save a thousand lives. The honest answer is, unless you have a lot of disposable time and money, you probably won't. But you can still make a difference. To one. To ten. To twenty.
And you know what? I'm not saying black people specifically came up with this- but how can you be surprised to know this is how I live my life when I say over and over that I was raised by black activists who lived during MLK Jr and Malcolm X and knew community action would have the longest-lasting effects? Of course I do all this. That's what being part of a community *is*.
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✨already on the metatron erasure campaign™ let's fucking go✨:
*EDIT, IMPORTANT* I can't believe i even missed this...but metatron is dressed in a dark coat and (iirc) tie
we know from s1 that metatron has very little patience for aziraphale, was pro-armageddon, and at least claimed to be the voice of God (when my man is basically a glorified answerphone)
the half-and-half miracle was conducted on top of the sigil, the transportation circle through which aziraphale dialled 101-metatron in s1, and we know the miracle ended up being Very Powerful
michael doesn't seem to recognise metatron... which is odd as theyre high ranking, uriel and saraqael seem to recognise him, they've definitely met, and michael was shown in the job minisode to have pretty good recollection for job's kids' names - possible memory wipe? saw something they weren't supposed to?
says he has consumed human matter before - why would metatron have been on earth??? and know what to order in a mf café???
speaking of the café, the dialogue, about people asking for death? "No... I don't suppose they do... So predictable."not sure on what this means but 💀 fckin weirdo
refers to muriel as the dim one but still puts her in charge of a heaven sanctuary on earth? as far as we know, the only one? hmmm seems like you want a puppet metty babes
butters up aziraphale with the sweet, cosy coffee - but indicating that he barely knows him at all given that we mainly see aziraphale drinking tea
what he ordered in the café was a small dash of almond syrup, but then describes it to aziraphale as being a hefty jigger of the stuff, indicating something added? wondering if there's further significance to the laudanum poison - an opiate? planning to essentially kidnap aziraphale knowing that crowley won't come looking now?
'hmm it's nice!" "yes I should jolly well hope so" 😁
a veeeeeery faint miracle chime as the coffee is handed over and when aziraphale raises it to his mouth, but hesitates... He asks "shall i...?" And metty goes:
"DRINK IT???😠 of course🙂"
definitely History™ with crowley; crowley readily recognises him after a moment, the look metatron gave him as they left the shop was filthy, and: "ah well! always did want to go his own way... always asking damn fool questions, too!"... like i get metatron is the voice of God, but was it metatron that actually made crowley fall? does metatron have that power, not exclusively god? did metatron say it was on god's orders?
plus - metatron tells aziraphale that he can reverse falling which, to me, seems like a pretty bomb ass power... and a bit OP even for the highest Archangel of heaven, leading me to:
very low, sultry ass voice, maintaining eye contact with aziraphale - all trademarks of hypnotism (temptation?) behaviour? while aziraphale was possibly drugged?
and was the promise of getting crowley restored to heaven actually a bluff, metatron knowing the aziraphale even attempting to broach it with crowley would split them up?
"go tell your friend the good news!!" Said in a voice that makes me think metty knows it's very Bad News Bears
is the whole thing a ploy to split them up? they came together in heaven, and then again on earth; is metatron trying to solve this one by essentially making aziraphale an offer he can't refuse, but that crowley absolutely will?
why choose the lift? why not just power up the circle and go through the sunroof???
and im sorry metatron but you must realise that aziraphale is severely underqualified right💀
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prophet-rebellion · 9 months
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Jolene's Emergency Vet Visit
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Description posted from GoFundMe Campaign:
So for those of you who gave followed me (and maybe seen the update) you'll know Salem has been missing for almost 6 months.
She was my ESA, and given my declining mental health, I didn't have much choice but to get a new ESA.
Enter miss Jolene Macchiato L. Whom I adopted almost two months ago and have whole heartedly decided to keep after realizing just how well we mesh.
You may also know I've been in the hospital the last few days - staying with my roommate who was admitted. I've been coming home to feed the cats and (unsuccessfully) treat them for ear mites. My new roommate was dog sitting and he brought fleas and ear mites into our home.
During this time, Jolene went to the bathroom on my bed multiple times. I at first chalked it up to stress and was told to keep an eye on here. Less than a day of being back from the hospital and her stool is light in color, runny, and most terrifyingly, has blood in it.
This is no longer an issue of stress, but could be a major intestinal/stomach problem when mixed with her inability to wait and use her litterbox. On top of that, she was running around like she was in pain, or something was wrong prior to going.
My second job is not a sure thing yet - it has been more than two weeks since the company reached out to me - and I have been looking for more. The money I thought I won was more a scam to get me down to the car dealership (which by the way, I hated as is because of the older man behaving increasingly grossly and inappropriate towards me).
My funding for Salem has stopped at this point - I have done every physical thing I can to find and bring her home. And now I need to focus on the new feline in my care.
I am taking Jolene to the vet tomorrow and using my new credit card - but there are limited funds and paying it back is my current concern when I have payments taking up to the 1,000s combined due these next two months.
I am setting it to $550 for now (because they take a portion), but the price my change depending on what the vet says and what is wrong.
I know she still need to get treated for ear mites ($300 on it's own) because the current medications I've been using are not working."
This is my fundraiser.
Additional pictures of her adoption papers added on here as well proving when I got her. JOLENE IS A REGISTERED ESA NOW.
Jolene as far as I have been told is two years old, though she is very small for her age. She is a sweet heart though she was likely on the streets for a most of not all her life before she was taken to the shelter and I adopted her a month later.
She is a sweet cat that just wants to check and make sure that you're okay. She'll cuddle. She doesn't meow but she does trill and sound like yoshi.
She just wants to make friends with everyone. And if you're not petting her enough then the grabs your hand and brings it right to her face as she stands on her back legs.
This is the last fundraiser I'm making. Ask anyone I know in real life and they'll tell you just how much I despise asking for help. I want to be able to do things on my own. But until I get one bite from the hundreds (literally) of jobs I've applied to as a secondary then I'm at a loss. I can't afford to wait and save up for this vet Visit - not when her health is on the line.
I can post a picture of her at the vets office tomorrow as well to confirm, along with the update of what they set.
GoFundMe
PayPal
Venmo
Currently $750/$750
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UPDATE - 08.02.2023
UNDER THE CUT
We went to the vet today.
TL:DR - she is on medications for the next two weeks, roughly. She did very good at the vet and was very brave. $500 was close, it will come out to be roughly $700 all together after ear mite treatment; we are holding off for now until the other cat in the house can be treated or they will just jump between them, which gives some more time to get there funds. But the over the counter medications are not strong enough to fight the infestation, and depending on severity, it could lead to long term health problems.
So I changed it from $550 -> $750 (again, because they take a processing fee). I also added in there roughly $200 that had been sent from PayPal and Venmo to give a more accurate show off current raised funds.
Below are screenshots of the update explaining more, along with pictures of Jolene at the vet today.
(Straight up, I almost cried because in the right two months that I have had her this was the first time she had crawled into my lap to lay down and cuddle with me.)
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wangxianficrecs · 4 months
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Rewind 2023 Part III
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WangxianFicRecs - Rewind 2023
The year is soon coming to a close, but I've still got more recs of stories published in 2023 to share with you all! Reminder that you can also still submit asks for Follower Recs and Proud Author Spotlights for the Rewind (just make sure to mention that it's for the Rewind!).
Part I
Part II
~*~
💙 Heaven, Wait
by sunflowersfield
T, 2k, Wangxian | Kay's Rec
Summary: “So, if you could have a tea bag that made 100,000 cups of tea,” he asks, grinning widely, “what kind of tea would you choose?” Silently, Lan Zhan considers this. He thinks he knows what his response would be if Wei Ying asked him the same question. If he was the one on this date with Wei Ying. “I have no idea,” Wei Ying’s actual date is answering now, shaking his head. “Do you really spend your time thinking about that sort of thing?” Lan Zhan clenches his fists as he watches the light behind Wei Ying’s eyes disappear. Or: What happens when you finally find someone who wants you to be yourself.
~*~
Every Mother's Son
by Chrononautical
T, 11k, Wangxian | Kay's Rec
Summary: When the former Madam Lan hears that the new Sect Leader Lan married a criminal who is kept in the same house where she once lived, she has only one choice. She has to return to Cloud Recesses to rescue Wei Wuxian!
~*~
Duo With You
by Nyatci (@nyatci)
T, WIP, 48k, Wangxian | Kay's Rec
Summary: Wei Ying, a college freshman doing his best to keep his life in order after being kicked out of his house, finds solace playing a new video game. He's a total 'noob' who one night gets paired up with a much more skilled (read: arrogant) player named 'HanguangJun'. After the match, HanguangJun is less than impressed with Wei Ying's skills and lets him know so, leaving Wei Ying with two choices: Follow HanguangJun's suggestion to 'uninstall the game' or...'git gud' ;)
~*~
The View Down Here
by Ferrous (@poorly-drawn-mdzs)
G, 1k, Wei Wuxian | Kay's Rec
Summary: You took a rest on the ground when the sun was high. Someone called your name, and you did not move. The sun dipped below the mountains and you remained. Your breath moves the hazy air above you in spirals as you continue to live despite your persistent stillness. - - - The Yiling Laozu takes a rest. Something observes.
~*~
catatonia: on the subject of mothers
by AvoOwO
M, 20k, Wangxian | Kay's Rec
Summary: Nóngwù is a dense, foggy town that drifts close to the east. It is a large, bustling merchant-town that consistently sees an added number of newcomers every new census. People are disappearing. Lan Wangji does not oftentimes believe in the worst outcome; often, the demon everyone is so fearful of is a simple imp, a simple ghost that may be dispelled. Memories and small things; the idea of mothers and something prodding at the very topic of it.
~*~
Hidden in the Clouds
by Karmiya (@fannish-karmiya)
E, WIP, 17k, Wangxian | Kay's Rec
Summary: While on a night hunt in Moling, a seventeen year old Lan Wangji meets a promising cultivator in a place he never could have expected. Wei Ying, for his part, only ever expected to have a pleasant few nights and pick up a few new talismans from this handsome young cultivator; but somehow, after a whirlwind affair, Lan Wangji proposes that he join his sect as an outer disciple and finally receive the formal training that was denied to him all his life. As foolish and reckless as it is, Wei Ying can't resist. The clouds hide many secrets, but how long can this secret be hidden?
~*~
💙 Reconnaissance
by TomatenMark (@tomatenmark5)
M, 2k, Wangxian | Kay's Rec
Summary: The Sunshot Campaign is over, but only just. Determined to finally get through to him, Lan Wangji seeks out Wei Wuxian who is selfmedicating in a winehouse. Turns out, once Lan Wangji has him in his grip, Wei Wuxian has peculiar trouble freeing himself. Or alternatively, the fic that was born from my fascination with how effortlessly Lan Wangji could hold coreless Wei Wuxian down during the stolen Poenix Mountain kiss and what that might mean in a different setting.
~*~
My Pet Rabbit Found His Husband at the Library, Or: How One Mischievous Rabbit Got Lan Zhan a Boyfriend
by katje
G, 1k, Wangxian | Kay's Rec
Summary: Lan Zhan had thought today would be like any other day working at the library. He had been working at this branch for nearly three years as the Youth Services Librarian, and he had his routine down to an art. From planning programs to culling books and replacing them with books more children would enjoy to holding animal therapy sessions with his Flemish Giant rabbit Tofu, he was as set in his routine as one could be working with the general public. Little did he know, however, his peace would soon be disrupted by none other than Tofu himself, who was usually a model employee. OR Lan Zhan is just trying to do his job, but his pet rabbit has other ideas - namely, finding himself and his baba a husband.
~*~
The Second Hand Unwinds
by trulywicked (@trulywicked)
E, WIP, 25k, Wangxian | Kay's Rec
Summary: Sent back in time without his husband after a night hunt gone wrong, Lan Wangji is determined to ensure that Wei Wuxian’s safety and in the process hopefully mitigate, if not prevent, the war. Through marriage among other things.
~*~
The Housewife's Guide to Causing Chaos
by dvasva (@dvasva)
M, WIP, 127k, Wangxian | Kay's Rec
Summary: “Of all the rotten luck I could have!” Outside, in between the gentle embrace of an imposing misty mountain and the caress of soft wind, stood the Cloud Recesses. It wasn’t a section that Wei Wuxian had recognized from his time in the sect, but the motifs of clouds and cranes in the buildings, the impeccable feng shui and carefully manicured paths, and the utter silence as the sect members slept peacefully, all burned themselves into Wei Wuxian’s eyes. No wonder the curtains were so firmly nailed to the walls! Any bit of demonic energy escaping the room could call down a veritable army of righteous cultivators! What sort of person in their right mind would dare to summon a spirit into their own body using resentful energy in the Cloud Recesses of all places? What kind of person would scoff so rudely at the Lan Clans most important rule, ‘Do not fraternize with evil?’ After being dead for four years, Wei Wuxian wakes up in a body he doesn't really feel comfortable with, in a place that he's sure wants him dead, and married to a man who surely hates him.
~*~
heated
by ilip13 (@ilip13)
E, 5k, Wangxian | Kay's Rec
Summary: "I’m so fucking horny," Wei Ying moans. She really is — she starts running a hand down her body, sweaty throat, unpleasantly sticky dip between her breasts, and then she is too tired to continue. "Wei Ying." Poor Lan Zhan, the heat has affected her even worse. Wei Ying’s beautiful, articulate Lan Zhan, spending the last three days with a blush high in her cheeks, blinking these slow, miserable blinks. "I know," Lan Zhan says. "Me too." * The AC is broken.
~*~
bitter cold, sweet mouth
by hauntedotamatone (@hauntotamatone)
E, 7k, Wangxian | Kay's Rec
Summary: “I’ll be out for a long while,” he says, running his fingers through the ends of his damp hair. “I’m not to make a habit of it, but Lan-daifu is concerned enough to think it’s necessary this time.” There is a wry little twist to his mouth, a hint of worry tucked into the corner of a smile. “You’ve got to protect me, alright Lan Zhan?” Wei Ying rises to his feet and walks past him without so much as a single glance over his shoulder. “What a shame it would be if some scoundrel found their way in while I was like this? All vulnerable and ripe for the taking.” The idea of any such scoundrel making it into Cloud Recesses, let alone getting close enough to even lay eyes on the jingshi is laughable, ridiculous. It has been far too long since Wei Ying has said anything ridiculous. He has missed it even more than he thought possible. _ Wei Wuxian struggles to acclimate to the change of seasons, Lan Wangji does his best to handle him with the care he deserves.
~*~
Seasons of Love
by Witch_Nova221 (@witchnova221)
G, 23k, Wangxian | Kay's Rec
Part of the MDZS Reverse Big Bang: 2023
Summary: Wei Wuxian returns to the Cloud Recesses, world weary and still looking for his place in the world. Lan Wangji is determined to show him just where his place is and that it will never be taken from him again. Inspired by the wonderful art of Esper-aroon for the MDZS Reverse Big Bang - 'Lan Wangji protective of Wei Wuxian'
~*~
Haunted house
by Indrel (@lovewanxian)
G, 2k, Pre-Wangxian | Kay's Rec
Summary: Two haunted homes and three promises made to protect A-Yuan from the ghosts and monsters that want to harm him.
~*~
lovely thorns and singing crows
by isabilightwood
E, 37k, Wangxian | Kay's Rec
Part of the MDZS Reverse Big Bang: 2023
Summary: “Lovely weather for a funeral.” “Atmospheric,” Lan Zhan agreed. Expecting, as had happened so often in his life, for the handsome stranger to stiffen at the sound of his voice, for that smile to turn false and brittle as they made their excuses. “You have a lovely voice,” they said instead, as if they weren’t calling eroded gravel beautiful when their voice was the finest jade. It was far from a typical compliment, but Lan Zhan was so starved for praise his heart clenched in his chest. On the day of his father's funeral, Lan Zhan receives a box of letters from his long-missing mother. His quest to find her leads him to a spooky, kooky, and loving family who just might want him to stay forever. (And of course, to the man of his dreams).
~*~
💙 Down comes the night
by danegen (@danegen)
E, 67k, Wangxian | Kay's Rec
Summary: Lan Wangji walks forward, extending his senses for some sign of the magic confining them. But there is nothing. One moment, he is walking away from the village. The next, Wei Wuxian stands in the road ahead of him, the dizi tracing lazy arcs in the air. He stops and looks behind him. The view has not changed. He stands there, helpless. Baffled. Like a koi circling a pond, eternally struggling to go nowhere. “Messes with your head, doesn’t it?” He turns to Wei Wuxian, who regards him calmly, almost pityingly. Wei Wuxian has endured this for months. Months. Lan Wangji wants to scream. He wants to batter down this cage and fly away without looking back. Or while returning from a night hunt, Lan Wangji is trapped in a strange village that is terrorized by monsters. However, an intriguing cultivator named Wei Wuxian is also trapped there, so it isn't all bad. And guess what? They have to be roommates.
~*~
(Please REBLOG as a signal boost for these hard-working authors if you like – or think others might like – these stories.)
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windywallflower · 22 days
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Hey folks~ Just a small reminder that we have a new pin project funding these days over on Backerkit~! We're really kicking ass on our stretch goals and the ones from here on out only get better~!
(not to mention if you've been eying any of our pins on the shop you can save on shipping by pledging now & adding things when we get to the pledge manager later <3)
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We're hoping this campaign can help us clear up the last of the vet bills and the only way to do that is if we hit 10k (pays off the campaign and the bet stuff and then we're scott free officially;;;)
Its a lot to ask these days. I know. Things have been a bit tight for us the past few months as we're waiting for convention season to really kick off. This campaign only goes on till the 18th of April so we've only got another 13 days to really do some damage and get these stretch goals unlocked.
Not for you? Can't back it right now? We'd super appreciate any and all boosts & shares <3
Thanks in advance everyone ;v;/
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luveline · 2 years
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hey jade! i hope you're having a good day so far, ily! if requests are open, could you maybe write something about the reader trying to surprise eddie by waiting for him in lingerie on his bed, but the campaign goes longer than she expected so she gets sleepy and falls asleep, only for him to come home and admire how pretty she is when she's all dressed up for him?
(i'm sorry if that's not clear, english isn't my language)
this is my favourite thing in the whole world ♡ suggestive 18+ mdni ♡ fem!reader | 0.8k words
Eddie pushes open the door and smiles. The familiar lump of your body under the sheets both reassures him and disappoints him, though he only has himself to blame for your sleeping figure. He's glad to see you but sorry to see you've fallen asleep. 
He turns to the door to hang up his jacket and bends down to pull off his shoes. "I'm home," he whispers, peering at the mess of your clothes on his desk and the drawings underneath. You've been busy while he's gone. 
Your clothes. He spins on his heel. "Sweetheart," he says, half-hoping you'll rouse. He wishes he could say he feels guilty for trying to wake you as he climbs up toward the pillows where your head lays. Really wishes he could be a good boyfriend and leave you to rest, but if you'd waited up for him undressed? Fuck, he's never staying late again. 
He kneels by your chest and brings his hand to your shoulders, stroking down the length of your arm. Your skin is hot under his. You stay sleeping and he melts at the sight of you, enamoured with the smooth set of your eyes and your soft pout. 
His hand meets the start of the duvet and pushes it down, hungry to find your hand where it hides underneath and plaster it in kisses. He's distracted very quickly by the fabric covering your chest. Not a bra, he realises, but a dress. Sheer, delicate fabric, nearly gauzy. It's a light colour that compliments your skin without hiding it.
"What the fuck," he mouths in awe, pulling the duvet carefully away from your body to reveal your thighs in garters and pantyhose.
The cutest pair of panties he's ever seen peek out from the hem of the skirt of your lingerie, covering the bump of your pretty cunt. He loves and hates them. 
Eddie brings his gaze back to your face and feels heat pooling fast and hard in the pit of his stomach. He drops the sheets.
You'd been waiting up for him in this and he'd totally screwed the pooch by staying late for the campaign. You always tell him to stay as late as he wants and for once he really wishes you hadn't. 
"Baby," he says, leaning down to level his face with yours. You don't stir. He drops a kiss against your cheek, another, painting a lazy line of affection over your peaceful face as his hand squeezes your upper arm. "Wake up. I'm home." 
You rise into consciousness slowly. The first thing you do is smile, turning your head to encourage the path of his kissing toward your mouth. He rubs your lips together softly, tip of his nose tapping yours. 
He pushes down with a good pressure and cups your cheek, holding you steady. Your hand flies to his wrist as you reciprocate. 
"Hi, Eddie," you say as he pulls away, wiping your tired eyes. "Time s'it?" 
"It's late. I'm sorry, I didn't mean to stay so long." 
Your eyes start to drift closed again. "That's okay, Teddy." 
He flattens his hands against your chest just shy of your neckline and massages his fingertips into your flesh kindly. "It's a nice dress." 
You frown, a sleepy confusion. Eddie can't hold in his laughter when your eyes open abruptly, flitting down to the fabric behind his hands. Your lips perk up into a shy smile. 
"Oh, god. I was waiting for you to get home, and-" 
"It's alright. My fault," he says. He runs a finger under one of the straps and plucks it away from your skin, the resounding snap loud, only adding to the fast-accumulating tension. "My poor girl, got all dressed up for me and I didn't show."  
He knows if he pressed his fingers to your pulse he'd find a riot. You're giving him that sweet smile, excitement hidden by twitching lashes like you can't decide where to look, his eyes or his mouth. 
"You could…" You shift beneath him, the subtle shift of your hips, your thighs coming apart. "Make it up to me?" 
He pushes the sheets down, eyes resolute on your face as your neediness begins to grow. 
He feels the silk of your garters under his hand, your breath quivering as he spreads your legs wide with a knee between them and ducks down the kiss the centre of your chest, pretty dress a softness against his lips. 
"I'm gonna show you just how sorry I am," he promises.
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beom-pyu · 11 months
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my wips! ★⋆⁺˚⋆。 °₊*️
see what's coming soon:
(more under the cut!)
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I CAN'T SWIM, IDIOT (choi beomgyu x fem!reader) POSTED.
SYNOPSIS:
your best friend just so happens to enter you both into a married-couple-greece-resort-stay-all-expenses-paid giveaway hosted by some random insurance company he found on twitter. but those things are always scams—there's no way you'd end up having to pretend to be beomgyu's wife for one week in a foreign country. and there's absolutely no way you'd end up seeing your childhood best friend in a different light after your stay. nope—not a chance.
RESET (kang taehyun x fem!reader)
coworkers to lovers, rivals to lovers, fluff, comedy, smut
SYNOPSIS:
working as a game developer has been your dream for years. you fought long and hard to work your way up to the top, and you've finally secured a stable, well-paying position at one of the lead gaming companies in the country. things are going well—until your head hires a new programmer to work alongside you for a new campaign. while you are excited to see fresh faces in the office, a problem quickly arises—you can't seem to get along with your counterpart. his know-it-all attitude rubs you the wrong way from the very beginning, and each day, you find it harder and harder to get anything done when he's over your shoulder, critiquing your every move. you don't know how much longer you can put up with his nagging until you downright lose your mind... and maybe your job as well.
(current word count: 3.24k)
TEASER:
“um, hello! nice to meet you. i’m y/n y/l/n, lead character designer,” you introduce yourself with a small bow, looking up to see taehyun smiling at you with those pretty wide eyes.
“i specialize in character design as well. i guess we’ll be working side by side this year,” taehyun shoots you with a blinding grin. your heart stutters a bit at his unwavering eye contact, nodding with a small smile.
“i guess so. you sure you can keep up, though?” you playfully flirt towards him, a low and quiet ‘ooooo’ coming from soobin and yeonjun on either side of you. taehyun remains unfazed at your comment, shrugging slightly at your words with raised brows.
“i’d like to believe so. i’m looking forward to seeing what you got, y/l/n.”
you smile a bit, your gaze unbreaking with his cat eyes.
“likewise, kang.”
END CREDITS (choi yeonjun x fem!reader)
underground boxer au, exes to lovers, heavy angst, fluff, smut
SYNOPSIS:
yeonjun feels as if he's stuck in a loop. every day is the same, boring, painful drag—work, fight club, dinner for ma, and repeat. he's completely numb to everyone and everything around him. why shouldn't he be? the only person he's staying alive for is his mother—if he were to die today, earth would continue to spin without a second thought. that is, until you pop back up into his life—and now everything he knows is flipped onto its head. you left him because of the way he is... so why are you staying this time?
(current word count: 4.6k)
TEASER:
“i think i’m just gonna head home. ma is probably waiting for me.” yeonjun forces a small, strained smile towards beomgyu, watching as the younger’s shoulders droop in disappointment.
“you are so lame,” beomgyu huffs, pushing yeonjun’s shoulder lightly. “dude, just come celebrate with us tonight. i swear i won’t ever ask you again.”
yeonjun shakes his head, shrugging on his gray zip-up before turning back around to walk out of the locker room, beomgyu still hot on his heels. “don’t feel like it, beomgyu. just drop it.”
beomgyu chases after yeonjun as he walks back into the crowded arena, shoving his way through all of the sweaty bodies as another fight starts up.
“you’re the most boring person i’ve ever met,” beomgyu shouts.
“and you’re the most annoying person i’ve ever met,” yeonjun shouts back, not even bothering to turn around and face the younger.
to be added:
rockstar!yeonjun x lead singer!reader - exes to lovers
farm boy!taehyun x city girl!reader - strangers to lovers
soon-to-be-married!soobin x wedding planner!reader - exes to lovers
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shuttershocky · 3 months
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The reason there's no DMC6 yet is because the only playable character is gonna Lady so they need to figure out her moveset so its perfect. I'm not coping of course not.
This is going to be blasphemy and sacrilege to say (on the same level as "DMC2 isn't unplayable" which I DO NOT ACTUALLY THINK BTW) but I think we're more than ready to get a Devil May Cry game without Dante. From how badly the girls got sidelined in 5 while teasing a Lady and Trish adventure that we never got, they deserve at least a full game.
Shit, make it a whole girl's night. Bring Lucia back and put her in an actually playable game. Expand Lady's moveset and so she's not just Gunslinger-only but DMC3-strength Gunslinger+++, she's called the walking arsenal for god's sake, give her twice the guns Dante has. Trish doesn't have the demon sword Sparda anymore so have Nico fashion up a big sci-fi scythe for her. V's summoner playstyle was undercooked in 5 and deserves a second chance but V himself can't be reused? Well it turns out Patty's a big girl now and she's the descendant of an incredibly powerful demon summoner so... Make her inherit V's playstyle (just replace the demons since they can't be DMC1 enemies anymore) but have actual attack and movement options for the summoner beyond just Royal Fork so Patty can fight and actually style on enemies, while adding more of the summoner-summon interactions that made V actually pretty cool like the ability to walk on Shadow's skewer or ride on Nightmare to force Domination.
And because gamers are going to cry if there's not a single man in the playable cast, Nero's still on Earth, except he now has both robot limbs and devil limbs, which made DMC5 Nero on new game plus play like a goddamn dream. Dante even officially left Nero in charge of Devil May Cry while he's in hell, so just have Nero in the office surrounded by all the girls. Everyone around's gonna think he's a debonair lady's man when he's actually a married guy surrounded by women his very poor uncle owes money to.
Besides, I think there's a lot of fun potential in Nero and Patty meeting each other. Both of them were orphans that eventually had run-ins with Dante, and Patty even posed as Dante's daughter while they traveled, making Patty the closest thing Nero can have to a weird cousin. They're even opposites in attitudes, with Nero being an unrefined gorilla (Nico herself can't explain how Kyrie fell for him) while 8 year old Patty was a pink balloons, flowers, plushies, and sundaes girl that probably stayed just as girly even when she grew into an adult. They would not work well together. Kyrie would love her though.
And fine of course Dante wouldn't actually get skipped over, it's just that being tied to Vergil means he's gotta play by Vergil's rules. This means the inevitable DMC6 Special Edition comes with both Vergil and Dante in a special mini campaign in hell on their mission to prune the underworld's biggest plant with the tiniest possible garden shears, the Yamato and the Devil Sword Dante. Maybe they piss off Mundus with their lawnmowing and that's what causes Mundus to launch an invasion on Earth, causing the events of the main story.
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kssyivo · 27 days
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sides || boynextdoor guitarist!taesan x president!reader
disclaimer: this is a gender neutral fic!! they/them pronouns are used, and the author is rusty lmao
now playing: west coast love by emotional oranges
for others it was an ordinary week of school, but for yn's party, it was preparation week. the day of the campaign was approaching and everyone in yn's party was brainstorming ideas on how to promote themselves.
"we finished with the posters already, right?" the secretary of their party, winter, asked "yeah, the design for the flyer and our presentation are ready, too." wonbin, their vice president, added "any other ways we could promote ourselves?" yn asked for suggestions "i have one" yoon announced
"how about, during the campaigning at theatre room, the school band's gonna play songs for audience impact, we could ask them!" yoon excitedly suggested
yn grimaced at yoon's idea "what, pres? you don't want to, do you? is it cause of taesan?" yoon teased to which yn rolled their eyes "it's a good idea but, are we sure they'd accept? i mean, there's nothing in for them." yn reasoned
winter giggled "i'm pretty sure taesan would convice his friends to do so if you asked, yn, we all saw how he looks at you." yn hung his head low in embarassment as his friends laughed. "in all seriousness, yn. i think that you should really ask, you're the president and taesan's pretty nice." wonbin said.
"what made you hate taesan that much anyway?" yoon asked. "hate is a strong word!" yn interjected "fine! what made you not like him? or whatever"
yn knew they had no way out of yoon's question, their friends are also waiting for the answer. yn sighed, "i used to date taesan. i can't say that it ended well, he took it maturely and i– i wasn't in my best mental state at that time." silence was present as yn's friends processed the information.
"say something" yn whispered
"so, when you look at him– or interact with him in general, your mental state from when you broke up surfaces?" wonbin asked nonchalantly "i hate you." yn joked.
"but yes, i guess." winter and yoon yelled in giddiness "you aren't over him are you?" winter asked while laughing with yoon "hey!" yn embarassedly replied, face turning beet red while stifling their laughter.
wonbin also couldn't hold in his laughter as the girls continued to laugh, clap, and yell.
"you HAVE to be the one to ask." yoon insisted as yn could only sigh in defeat "fine, fine."
🎸🎸🎸
yn made their way over to the music room where the school band practices, as he neared the door, someone exited and almost bumped into them. "oh i'm sorry!" the girl exclaimed
"hey violet!" yn greeted "what were you doing in there?" violet, the president from an opposing party smiled "campaign stuff, you get it." yn chuckled "okay, good luck!" yn said as they entered the music room.
the light chatter among the band members settled as they recognized the person who entered. "look who's here." taesan smiled as he approached yn who braced themselves.
"play nice, taesan. i'm here to ask for a favor." yn avoids the taller's eyes, meanwhile taesan doesn't shy away from eye contact.
"and that is...?" yn sighed and mustered up their courage to look at taesan in the eye. "i want the band to play during our campaign." taesan smiled at the shorter.
"is that how you ask for favors?" taesan teased to which he received an eye roll from the shorter.
"c– can you please play during our campaign? it would really help my party."
taesan smiled "i'd love to, boss." yn tried to hide their excitement but their eyes betrayed them. taesan chuckled at the younger as yn hurriedly left the room "i owe you one!" yn smiled at him.
jaehyun immediately cleared his throat as soon as yn left and caught taesan's attention "what's between you two?" jaehyun asked, suspicious of their actions
"yeah, why does yn act so flustered when you approach them? that's the only time i see them get so... folded"
woonhak added as sungho could only chuckle, being the only one to know about their past.
"let's just say... we have history." taesan looked down as he walked back to the boys "what about violet? didn't she also ask for us to play during her campaign?" riwoo asked "drop that, i think taesan would rather play for yn, and i don't mind playing for yn." jaehyun answered for taesan, which were followed by 'me too's.
🎸🎸🎸
it is now time for their campaign, violet is finishing up her time on the stage and it is time for yn's party to come up on stage.
cheers and claps were heard throughout the auditorium as yn, wonbin, winter, and yoon make their way up to the stage.
"good morning everyone! we are the younique party!"
everything went by like a breeze, everyone had fun during the campaign and the audience seemed to accept them well. "now, please help me welcome our very own, boynextdoor!" yn announced as their party left the stage as taesan and the rest of the band made their way backstage
"i dedicate the next few songs for yn and their party." taesan said before the band started their small session.
yn only watched from backstage as taesan enjoyed himself onstage. their eyes met a couple of times which didn't fail to make yn flustered.
as boynextdoor finished their session after 3 songs, yn and their party made their way back to the stage and thanked everyone for the successful campaign.
the party alongside boynextdoor went backstage as it was the next party's turn to campaign.
as they arrived backstage, yn immediately pulled taesan somewhere private. "hey, thank you for– uh– preparing 3 songs for our campaign, it might not mean much to you but it does for me." yn said in gratitude, avoiding eye contact once more.
"it means a lot to me performing for you, yn." taesan answered genuinely.
yn pushed him lightly, feelings giddy, unable to hide their smile. yn grabbed his collar and pulled him in for a deep kiss. taesan quickly recovered from his shock and held yn's waist, deepening their kiss.
tongue was involved as they kept kissing each other, breaking away to catch their breaths "god, i missed you." taesan breathed out, kissing yn's neck, "i miss you so much." he whispered onto the shorter's neck.
"i missed you too."
they were interrupted by a knock as yn quickly got off taesan "pres, shouldn't we go back to our classroom?"
wonbin voiced out.
"yes– yes you guys can go first, i'll follow!" yn said in a rush, fixing their shirt. "tonight, 8pm, pick me up." yn said in a jokingly stern voice to taesan. the taller approached yn and landed a peck on his lips.
"yes, boss."
🎸🎸🎸
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medusapelagia · 3 months
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Separate Ways - NSFW -Ch 1/22
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Here we are... after 9 months my baby is finally here! This is my fic for the @bigbangharringrove! A huge thanks to my incredible artist @lemonhitsu (without whom I would have probably dropped out ages ago and who made this beautiful moodboard) and thank you so much to @bottombillyapologist for being my beta!
Summary: Steve Harrington is a famous model whose live depends on his manager and (more or less) lover, Tommy Hagan. After a bar fight, he meets Officer William Hargrove, recently transferred to the NY Police Department and with a deep personal experience with a violent environment, who can clearly see the signs of domestic violence in Steve's relationship with Tommy. Determined to help the pretty boy escape from his abusive relationship, Billy gets closer and closer to Steve.
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READ ON AO3
A little snippet under the cut
Steve Harrington is the most booked runway model in the world.   His face and his body are everywhere. On billboards, on magazine covers, and plastered  over ads at bus stops.   Steven Joseph Harrington, twenty-fourth years old, is the richest model in the world.  And he is about to celebrate his achievement with Tommy: Tommy Hagan, his high school friend, was the one that pushed him to pursue a modeling career and now, somehow, he owns his life. He is the one that chooses which campaign Steve is going to do a photo shoot for or which fashion show is worthy of his presence. He is the one that chooses every single thing that Steve eats. He books trainers for him when they travel abroad.   Paris, Milan, London, New York— he doesn’t have to worry about anything. Tommy books the flight— always business class— and the hotels, always luxury suites. All Steve has to do is show up and let Tommy take care of him.   It’s not bad, it's just... sometimes Steve would like to do something different from  walking on the runways or training in the gym. He used to play basketball, but Tommy  completely prohibited him from contact sports: they can't risk someone  elbowing him in the face before a fashion show.   He’s not wrong. But Steve loved team sports. He had a lot of friends, but now he feels like he has no friends left.   But he still has Tommy. And Tommy would never leave him.  
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thedeafprophet · 9 months
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Finished drawing my character designs/ line up of the Light Fingers Crew to formalize my drawing of them
Overview/ Design talk under the cut if anyone is interested in that sort of thing
For all the designs I used the art given for them in the game as a starting point and then went from there. For all but Hephaesta of course that means using a non character specific art. I also wanted all the colors to sort of fit together so where i would have done more vibrant stuff and i strayed away from that.
Clara and Her Sister
Putting the discussion for these two together, as their designs recieved similar thoughts because they are identical twins. ('She is wearing the Fading Music-Hall Singer's face, which seems rude.')
The basic art of the bohemian faction is used to depict the sisters.
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So this was my basic starting point for the visual design. I ended up diving further into research into bohemian fashion, which of course lead to me reading up on the history of the term and the connection to the Romani people. According to wikipedia, the word comes from the french term 'bohémien', which was the word for the Romani people.
This of course put a complex spin when i looked into the clothing used in the time, as theres a question between cultural appropriation and cultural appreciation, and one I don't have the full understanding for.
Nevertheless i did take some inspirtation for the clothing here, Clara with having her hair loose and down and looser clothing, the singer with the hair scarf and the necklace among some inspirations.
Inbetween the two I imagine the singers appearance to be more reserved then Clarabelle's. For one, my interpretation of the singer is as someone who uses her singing as a backdrop for sneaking and gathering information (per her role as a 'contact' of the player). The other being that we are told Clara's title is the 'eccentric opera singer' to me implies a grander sense of creatativity and wilder clothing. In less stressful times I imagine her wearing brighter clashing colours and skirts with patterns on them and jewlery (which i intend to draw at a later time when i get better at adding patterns to clothes lol).
We also know the two of them are 'not young' so i attempted to not make them appear so.
Hephaesta
Heph is of course the one character of the group with a personalized art, which i used as the base for my design.
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Hephaesta is supposed to be a large figure, as she is a strongwoman, and is described as towering over even jasper and frank. So of course I had to make her tall compared to the others of the group.
And of course i can't go without bringing up Katie Sandwina (again), a real strongwomen of the time who serves as a great inspiration both in body type and height.
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What a woman huh.
Dr Vaughan
The Campaigner template art was the one used to depict her when you first speak to her and was a starting point here.
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To me i always pictured her as a fairly older women given her experience and amount of time she's been researching. Clearly someone with a lot of exprience. And also i just vibe with it.
I kept her outfit simple, as i dont figure her as someone to put too much into the latest fashion given her focus on her work. I took the green from the art to use as her skirt to tie in that colour. I also looked up some photos of female doctors of the time and that partially influenced my art direction here.
Obliging Silverer
I debated including him or not given that you only have him as part of the team if you use the light fingers exclusive option to access the parabolan basecamp. But given the fact that he literaly dies defending the camp, I think its only fair that he gets included.
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i just had a bit of fun with the design as there wasnt too much to restrict off. I dont draw a lot of characters with mustaches depsite them being a thing of the time, so I figured this was a good excuse as any. I kept with some orange colours within his colour scheme for further callbacks to parabola and his work.
Also hey did you know that people of an ashkenazi background can also have red hair? Fun fact heh.
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