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nerves-nebula · 1 year

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oo I was wondering if maybe the brothers in your AU would have different levels of food anxiety? Honestly I was thinking mostly Raph, considering he's the oldest, largest (at least body weight wise it seems?) and probably expends the most energy taking care of his brothers and doing most of the chores when he was younger.

Probably especially bad that Leo could bully food from any one else and get away with it, and sounds like he might've picked on Raph most in that regard, or if Leo took Donnie or Mikey's food Raph was more willing to split or even give his portions away.

That's assuming Splinter even fed them, which considering the "timeout corner" they might have had to forage for food more than once.

Because like I was thinking about the dynamic between Raph and Casey and how Raph's food anxiety could be what helped drive him to make sure Casey had at least some food (he knows how much it sucks and doesn't want someone else to be stuck like that) and how Casey could have a big impact on Raph if he helped Raph to have a more stable source of food/ate enough.

<- also kinda related thoughts. Raph might be smaller in your version because he didn't get all the nutrition he needed growing up so his height/size is stunted? Also maybe why Leo is the tallest (favourite child privileges?). Hunger might have also helped drive Raph to try running away?

<- I could definitely see Mikey and/or Donnie having food anxiety too, with either food hoarding or getting aggressive when they think someone will steal their food? Or fast eating.

<- Basically I am ROTATING THEM IN MY HEAD!!

OHHHH this is an ask i have so much personal investment in because here’s a Not Super Secret fact about me, I’ve got Avoidant restrictive food intake disorder! And (partially because of that) I starved a lot as a kid! BASICALLY me and all my siblings have weird relationships to food so I am FULLY committed to making these guys relationships with food weird as well.

Splinter DOES feed them, in that there is FOOD in the HOUSE which is EDIBLE. He doesn’t really cook for them, though. Raph’s been cooking for them since he was old enough to take on that job, though he mostly made easy stuff at first like sandwiches/soup/noodles/uncooked vegetables.

So lets go through each turtle and look at how things turned out, why dont we?

Leo: Leo has the least food issues of them all. To him, it’s more like a status thing. If he wants something, he’ll take it. It doesn’t matter if there’s only enough soup for them to each have one bowl, he’ll have two if he feels like it. He does it because he knows he can get away with it, and because it’s been normalized. It doesn’t feel like a huge issue/violation to him.

Mikey: Mikey binges/eats food as fast as possible. He doesn’t wanna give anyone the chance to take it from him. He’s the least discerning and will eat stuff even if it’s kind of rotten/stale. He doesn’t have the self restraint to hoard food, he’d just eat it all immediately. Mikey gets reasonably aggressive about his food, but wouldn’t actually hurt his brothers (except maybe Leo) to get it back. then again his brothers (except leo) typically wouldn't take it from him anyway.

Donnie: Donnie has a ton of texture issues and because of that he’s a picky eater, he’s starved the most second only to Raph, because even when there IS food he can’t always get himself to eat it. he’s more used to the pain of starvation than the disgust of eating something with a Bad Texture

(shoutout to MYSELF. I was really out here dying as a 12 year old, huh? Fully eating 1 sandwich a day and crying about it cause the bread felt gross and dry in my mouth.)

Donnie is prone to hoarding food, but keeps it hidden in various places because if Leo thought Donnie had more food than him, he’d try to steal it. So Donnie keeps his stashes secret, but will share food if he thinks the others REALLY need it. Because Donnie can only eat specific kinds of food, he’s very aggressive about protecting his food from others. But he can’t beat Leo in a fight, so he usually resorts to hiding the food.

Donnie has slight cannibalistic urges because of all that (and cause he’s a softshell lol), but it’s not a huge issue and he’d never act on them cause the idea/texture of eating another PERSON is repulsive. He’ll often just chew on something (even himself) to tide himself over.

Raph: poor, beautiful Raph. Raphael, my darling boy. SO FIRST OF ALL Raph starved the most. If Leo took more than his fair share, Raph would split his portion for his little brothers, because to him taking care of them is his whole reason for being alive.

he has cannibalistic urges too, cause he starves the most (and cause he's a snapping turtle). and that makes him feel like a terrible person. Donnie and Mikey get these urges too, but they never starved quite as bad as Raph did because he’d always split his food with them.

I like the idea that Raph is stunted because of nutritional issues, so yknow what? I'm adopting that. it's canon now.

as for Raph and Casey,,, I think they would definitely share food. In fact, I think Raph would leave Casey food/snacks as gifts when he was trying to befriend him. Casey eventually bringing along food from above ground would be a GAME CHANGER for the turtles, too.

one correction: Donnie is actually the tallest! He just slouches a lot (and I've mostly drawn them as kids, before his growth spurt)

Man, sidenote, but writing this really got me thinking about my childhood more. If we didn't get enough to eat, mom would get mad at us like “why didn’t you eat??” IDK I’m 11 and you’ve been gone all day!! She’d check in with the older kids and ask them (and eventually me, cause at a certain point I was the oldest one home) if the other kids had eaten. And sometimes i’d say i did just to get her off my back. God what a shithole. Anyway, this was a fun ask hah.

#nnstuff #ask #tmnt #disordered eating #food tw #tmnt au #teenage mutant neglected turtles #child neglect tw #child abuse tw #long post

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mooncalfe-art · 1 year

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Greetings!

I am curious about something , if you don't mind me asking . Your Secret of the Ooze was the first comic I saw from you, before I discovered IDW not to long after and realized that you are one of the artists and writers . I loved the story and the characters from the moment I saw them and read the interactions between them . Tho. After I found IDW , I always asked myself the question: Was your adaptation made before or after you became part of the IDW team and, will the story ever be continued/ finished? If not , are there eny unused ideas from this comic that are going to be adapted in the stories from the on going series ?

Were ideas from the old comic used in current issues in eny way ? For example , the story line whit Alopex from that comic end it on a cliffhanger . The story from the main issues about her are in eny way some old ideas relocated and modified to fit in the new bigger world , which were original from the old comic that you did not get to use in it ?

Very curious about this .

Hi! Glad you like Secrets of the Ooze, thanks! The answers to your questions are complicated but I'll try to keep it simple.

I started doing stuff for IDW in late 2011/early 2012. After my Northampton story arc in 2014 they offered me a full-time position as the main artist but I turned it down because of various reasons, mostly because all the TMNT work I'd done up to that point was very emotionally fraught for me. Like I was too invested, too much of a fan to handle it professionally, I'd get too stressed out about it and the compromises I'd have to make with the powers-that-be. So instead of taking the job I decided to do my own fan-comic where I could do whatever I wanted with the Turtles, and that's what became Secrets of the Ooze. So it didn't happen before or after, really, especially since I wasn't doing any writing for IDW back then. My former editor did bring up a couple times the possibility of IDW publishing SotO but I said no, that would just create the same problems that made me do the fan-comic in the first place.

I haven't forgotten the comic and I think about continuing it every so often but I just don't have time these days. :( I'm not planning on any of the ideas in the fan-comic being used in the IDW comic, no, they're entirely separate in my mind. SotO's version of the Turtles, other characters, and even how mutation works are all too different to really be adapted into the IDW comic. SotO was going to be a single, self-contained story with a definite end, so there isn't much in there that isn't very specific to that story, and anything I'd adapt from it would have to be super modified and lose all its context in which case what's the point? The closest it'll ever get is that I drew Artemisia as an easter egg in the background of one issue. ;)

The stuff going on with Alopex in the ongoing is totally different than what was going on with her in Secrets of the Ooze (which I won't say anything about in case I do ever continue the comic, haha).

Anyway, I guess the basic simple answer is that no, there's nothing specific from Secrets of the Ooze that I've adapted into the IDW TMNT comic and I have no plans to do so, either.

Hope that helps and thanks again for reading! :)

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mushroomjeremy · 1 year

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RE: 682's environment

To give my two cents, I think a species of 682 would likely live in a broken down site that, outside of that, is placed in a swamp-like environment, maybe along the lines of a mangrove swamp specifically? I am thinking of some dirty lakes or something like that, too, with algea that look similar to the mop of hair 682 is commonly portrait with. The broken down site could be at various levels of 'reclaimed by nature' across the place, with the upper/ground levels having plants grow into it and maybe some other animals that have gotten in over time, while the lower levels are a bit more intact still. The latter could also work for you wanting to keep the acid; maybe it's on one of the middle floors and now is eating its way all the way to the bottom, clearing the way for nature to get into the site further in the process?

This was generally what I was thinking for the first few integration.

Was going to use Florida mangroves as a base if it was a swamp and for the site biome that was what I was thinking with maybe some acid around the place from broken pipes that lead to the main containment chamber like an acid waterfall thing or maybe some other refences to other anomaly still around (mainly ones from the 682 termination attempts) and add lots of acid resistant plants/extremophiles.

I was thinking of 682 hair maybe being like kelp, so the moss could really work, similar to how algae grows on snapping turtles.

I kinda want to do a few of these as there are many 682 origin stories and they all varied enough to have their own ecosystems to go with them. Like different species, subspecies, or genus.

Current ideas are alien!682 gets the swamp like land the rains acid, scarlet!682 gets more "water" or the containment chamber breakout, beast!682 maybe get some kind of forest which could be the mangrove while alien!682 has a swamp with less vegetation maybe, and Gears!682... I have no idea currently for him as all four version's biomes can currently be interchanged at will.

#.txt #rhouxl #scp #scp 682 #cryptozoology #cryptoecology #I know to many 682 origin they are all weird and if anyone doesn't understand what I just wrote its alright #Alien!682 is one with them being from a different planet #Scarlet!682 is Scarlet King 4th child #Beast!682 is beast from bible #Gears!682 is a one off tale where Gears got got and turned into 682

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myfitnessblog0086 · 1 year

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Pre workout formula. Post-workout formula. Is it needed? Can't you just take a gamer formula and put in the work? Can't you just put in the work and forget the whole thing?

Again these are opinions based on personal experience. I'm not here to sell you anything or recommend anything but I will talk about my experiences with these products.

Please note that I didn't always use these formulas exclusively for exercise. Sometimes I just wanted to have something to Kickstart my day.

The MEAT of it!

ALWAYS personal preference and belief. A lot of people discount the power of belief. If you believe a product is working then keep using it.

As with anything you can do it yourself if you put your mind to it, and keep at it. I believe that the pre and post workout formulas are designed to help you make that transition a little bit easier so you can get on with your day a little faster and not feel completely wrecked. You want to work out as hard as you can with your morning workout and you want to be able to move around afterwards because you've got stuff to do.

I've been taking a pre-workout formula lately on an on and off basis. All of them are at least $30 and to me that's precious. I want to take those 30 servings and I want to expand them as long as possible. I am NOT JUST POOR, I am THRIFTY! 😂

Explanation :

I only bought one type of Ghost flavor and that was the TMNT Collab. That's when they first released their version 2 of Legend, Pump, and Gamer.

I grew up with TMNT in the 90's, before power rangers came on. TMNT Comics by Archie, coming out of our shells tour, Video Games, toys, etc.

Besides TMNT I am also a fan of Pac-Man. I suppose you could tell with the Rocky Balboa Pac-Man crossover pictures.

I've been taking a pre-workout or some kind of morning Energizer to help with my exercise for over a year now. It has evolved through various different means, and I PERSONALLY I'm able to do about 30 minutes of Fitness Boxing, take a 15 minute break and go back at it for another 30 minutes. I'm talking about the highest difficulty fast speed. 3,000 punches a day.

I know that everybody is not me.

Again everybody's DNA is different and so everybody is going to react differently to these chemicals. I am considered to be an Advanced user in Fitness Boxing. Some days my Fitbit doesn't even register me getting a fat burning or a cardio workout when I'm doing my boxing. My body is used to it by now. To get into that cardio zone or that fat burning zone I've had to use other things to push it there. Something as simple as adding a little bit of foot movement constantly while boxing, or doing some jump rope before you start to get your heart rate up.

At first I used CO2, just adding it to my morning drink before headed off to work. Well at work I'd stand around for about 8 hours a day, feeling pain. I didn't like the fact that I had to be popping pain pills. That's kind of when I really got into the whole Hydrogen Water.

Eventually I started getting back into the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles, the old cartoons, comics and figures. A lot of that older stuff is starting to come back and get released in new ways now. So I switched from CO2 Sport Ripped to Ghost Legend and Ripped.

I like to believe that it does work and it's worth the money. So I keep buying it. I keep buying the post workout formula too. I want to make sure that I have a good recovery and the best gains possible. Could it be a coincidence that on the days that I do take it I seem to have better results?

Ghost has Collabs like G-fuel, however they have other products as well too such as whey protein, recovery, weight loss, pre-workout and post-workout formulas. Ghost Legend and Pump is a Pre-workout formula. Other ones like G-fuel don't have work out formulas, but they do add powdered nutrient supplements. Powdered fruits and the like. I like that too. I just feel it's a shame that they don't do something that focuses specifically on other stuff like exercise and weight loss. I do like that the gamer formula is more nutrition based though by adding fruit powders and that kind of stuff.

The collabs draw you in. It did for me, and I ONLY TRIED Legend and Pump TMNT. If GNC ever runs out then maybe I'll go back to something else or maybe I'll stop altogether. The Legend is 45 and Pump is 40. At GNC they have a very flexible subscribe and save and I save maybe about $5.

Speaking for a friend.. He told me he preferred the ghost gamer supplements without the Antioxidants added in G-fuel. I know he's a fan of Battletoads and Spyro the Dragon. Both have Collabs with G-fuel right now. I myself am a little bit attracted to the fact that there's going to be a Pac-Man Collab soon.

CO2 Ripped Sport, which is not bad and kind of affordable. (I mean Kind of affordable because there are weight loss supplements already on the market that are around the same price. ones that are more expensive too. After a while the multiple purchases of multiple products begin to add up.) About $30 a can unless you get the one with the silver packaging which is about 40 to 45 in store. Online you might be able to get a better deal. The scooper is going to have you add a little bit less than you normally would with Ghost cuz it's a smaller canister and I suppose more concentrated. The ripped sport version or just plain old ripped version has an added fat burner.

When I brought up the fact that I use these products with my nutritionist he told me Ghost was a good brand. However because of the expense it makes it a precious commodity for me.

I have been able to find the Legend (Leo) and Pump (Raph) at GNC, and bought some last October 2022. Currently the TMNT is unavailable through the app but the app does have a full explanation of what is inside the can. They are GMO Free, Gluten Free, Vegan, and believe in full transparency with their products.

CO2 you're pretty much able to find anywhere. I found it at Walgreens, Hy-Vee, Meijer, Amazon, etc. It contains proprietary blends that won't tell you what's in them. However many health products already do. Including some that already might be in your cupboard.

I always believe in eating real food. I buy greens powder that's made with real food. I take vitamins that are made with real food. I personally like powders that are made with real food. I am NOT Vegan, but on a daily basis I eat vegetarian.

Unfortunately where I live there are very few vegan options. This is the land of fat people and pizza. In fact one grocery store near me has three isles of frozen pizza. In the deli is more take n bake pizza. In this land of pizza we have basically have for Domino's pizzas in town. Pizza hut, Papa john's, little caesars, Glass nickel Pizza, Sammy's pizza, Figaro's Pizza, Godfather's Pizza, Papa Murphy's Pizza, Pizza Ranch Pizza Buffet, etc.

None of those places have vegan options and I think I've only seen vegan pizza available at one grocery store. Unfortunately this also used to be a land of farmers so were very much into butter, dairy, bacon, and beef. Even some of the local gyms have a pizza day in which you can grab a few free slices of Pizza on your way out.

Now.. TMNT of course has been sponsored by Pizza Hut for almost its entire lifetime. The last movie that ever graced the big screen was sponsored by Pizza Hut. Once upon a time I actually ate from every pizza place in town. I just have chosen a different course.

#fitness boxing #boxing #fit #fitness #fitspiration #rocky #rocky balboa #pac man #teenage mutant ninja turtles donnie #nintendo #nintendo switch #switch games #ghost pump #ghost legend #co2 #power rangers #gfuel

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veryimportantsparkles · 2 years

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Leaf Green part 2: The Forgotten Source Reborn

I frequently say I’m a Squirtle fan. Squirtle is my starter of choice and in nearly every Pokemon game since, I have chosen a water starter. The exception is in 4th gen, where I picked Turtwig, specifically because it is a turtle. When Sword and Shield released and we found out that Squirtle was not in the game (although Charmander was) I was genuinely upset. When Squirtle (and Bulbasaur) was added back in with the DLC I was relieved.

I have a very cringe personal mythos for my Blastoise. He is strong and brave and loyal and absolutely the best. If Blastoise was my dad, things would be different. His name is Tortoise, because I was ten years old and uncreative, and he was the solo powerhouse of my Blue version. I actually remember very few of the Pokemon in my original file, because I didn’t need them. I just overleveled Tortoise and had him Mega Punch literally everything to death.

Tragically, my Blue must have had a faulty battery or something, because one day my file was gone. I was still ten or maybe eleven, I don’t think Gold and Silver were even out yet, this was incredibly early in Pokemon’s history and I was already experiencing accidental file death. I tried starting over, with Tortoise Two, but the cartridge simply wouldn’t hold a save anymore. I wasn’t TOO distraught, but I was definitely a little buttmad. I would come up with dramatic fanfiction where my beloved Blastoise was killed by Team Rocket, as a tragic backstory for my Mary Sue trainersona who was also Ash’s girlfriend and James’s cousin.

When Fire Red and Leaf Green were released, of course I started with Squirtle. Tortoise was reborn, and in my personal headworld he’s literally the same one. I revived him, summoned him from a banished reality, reconstructed him from memories and love and Game Boy Advance magic. He has continued to live a long and happy life, still in Fire Red, but maybe he’ll get to migrate up soon. He’ll finally get to meet my Torterra, Tortoise Jr, named so because turtle starters are the best.

Because I’ve been working on my 3rd and 4th gen Pokemon games so much lately (completing as much as possible before migrating up, possibly up to 6th gen) I’ve remembered a dark little point in my history. If I can justify Tortoise through imaginary necromancy, there’s someone else I should bring back. Her name was Eliza.

When my dad first came home with Pokemon Blue for me, I ran straight up to my room to start the game. Mom said I was hyperventilating and should calm down. I did not. I started my file, and picked a starter based on the cuteness of the sprites. I actually picked Charmander. Her name was Eliza, because it has ‘liz’ in the middle and she’s e liz...ard. I took her as far as Brock’s gym and lost hard. I reset the game, chose Squirtle instead, and cruised through the early game on type advantage.

I didn’t speak about Eliza, but not because it was a forbidden secret about my past. I hadn’t built a personal mythos around my video games yet. I was much more pragmatic as a ten-year-old than I am now, as a sad 32-year-old who is writing long Tumblr posts about necromantic turtle dads. I just didn’t want to let the other kids at school know I sucked at training a Charmander. I had been reading up on Pokemon in Nintendo Power for most of the year before getting the game, and I should have known better. I knew the type chart, I should have known to train a little more. As an adult, I also now know about the other various Pokemon available at that point in the game that could’ve made the fight easier. But as a ten-year-old I was dumb as hell and pushed that file reset to the back of my mind. Squirtle is my starter.

As a side note, at some point I had a copy of Red as well, and did have a Charmander in that one. I shared that cartridge with my siblings and straight up do not remember anything about that file. I don’t think anything was nicknamed. That whole experience is walled off in my brain as non-canon.

Now, in my new Fire Red I have reconstructed Eliza. I did some resetting to get a female Charmander and she’s doing well. I decided to make it a goal in this file to catch all female Pokemon whenever possible, with exceptions made for that sacrificial Machop and for any gift Pokemon with randomized genders. They’re going to have normal-person names that tie into their species in some cutesy way whenever possible. I named my character ‘Rose’ (my middle name) in this file to distinguish it from all the ‘Megan’ OTs on my other Pokemon, and that will be the surname for this group. Eliza Rose and her sisters. They’re coming home.

It was VERY WEIRD to do the first rival fight, by the way! I never experience the Gary battle with the Squirtle on his side instead of mine. I never see the front sprite for Squirtle because I have the Squirtle. I named my rival ‘Josh’ as a joke, and I laid in bed with the real Josh while I played.

“This feels so weird,” I said, “He has my Squirtle.”

“It’s my Squirtle,” said Josh.

“No it’s my Squirtle. I pick Squirtle, I always have Squirtle.”

“Nope, I have Squirtle. My Squirtle.”

“My Squirtle!”

“Nah, my Squirtle.”

How dare he, he doesn’t appreciate Squirtle. Josh is a Bulbasaur picker, he has no business taking my Squirtle.

#long post #pokemon #diary time #'if blastoise was my dad' is a meme #i'm not actually that weird i swear #leaf green gijinka journey

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potteresque-ire · 3 years

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Hi! I have been reading your posts and responses to anonymous and I am inclined to comment on your broadly realistic views and detailed analystic answers and let us not forget your ability to be warm in putting forward your opinions. I am truly a huge fan. Thank you for being a station for various answer seekers.

If you have time and patience, please elaborate on the situation GG is still facing post 227. Recently I read various comments insinuating GG copied DD for Douyin night which is absurd but the implication that only one party is still being targeted unnecessarily raise hackles of a lot of solo fans. And I, under any circumstances, DO NOT believe the involvement of the other party. Firm believer of BJYXSZD.

My point is what is being done to stop these antis from targeting GG. Since one of the motive to target GG is to severe the relationship of GG and DD, IMO at least. Does constant attack (external stimulus) on GG (belittling him by comparing him to DD) may have the possibility to effect their relationship (internal reaction)? Objectively yes, but given your perception of their relationship, what is your opinion in this matter, however subjective it may be?

Moreover, how much extreme and sometimes irrational analysis done by bjyx community can lead to harm to both of them especially GG?

Also, I have seen DD being the captain of BJYX in various circumstances but also throwing off people from their old predicted/maintened theories especially in case of Kadians. I am not sure how much to trust these 'candies' since he has a reputation of not giving a f*** of others opinion. So why would he post GG related or non-related content with same kadians. I mean if he posts private content with GG related kadian then why post promotional content with GG related kadian. Does it imply that kadians are related to GG or not or he doesn't care and we are thinking too much. I am not sure what I am writing now, maybe multitude of thoughts poring out here. I am extremely sorry for that.

I do not know whether people believe or not but 1st post by GG yesterday had initials YB in the circle. Not at all explicit, and depends on believers but I felt like he was just trolling BJYX, it may be good naturedly but after his promotional brand picture of shrimp in bunny's hand. I do not know I just felt, dissappointed/bitter/unsure about all of this. I think it is normal to feel this way from time to time even for SZD because along with emotional investment we have rational perspective which is necessary to scrutinize evidence(maybe) from time to time.

I whole heartedly apologize for writing an essay length ask, this is the reason I wanted your patience 😅.

If any other blogger wants to add or comment on this please feel free to do so. Your suggestions are highly welcomed. 🙏

Hello Anon!

I take it that your questions about safety are concerned about the behaviour of c-solos and c-turtles? International fans aren’t likely to put Gg and Dd at any risk. That said, however, frequent fighting among i-fans would likely drain Gg and Dd’s international fanbase, as many fans do not enjoy being a combative atmosphere (I, for one, will run away as quickly as a turtle can run!). Lost i-fans can’t be easily replenished, whether they’re turtles or solos ~ The Untamed, as a foreign language show so beloved that fans are willing to scale tall language and cultural barriers to understand it, isn’t something that comes around often. (stanning Gg and/or Dd does take a lot of work!)

About the arguments. I probably only know about a fraction of them since I do not interact directly with fans outside Tumblr . As far as I can tell, however, recent arguments among c-solos and c-turtles have been ordinary fights, and also, fairly “bi-directional” between the solos (ie. I don’t think Gg or Dd has been relatively exempt from attacks compared to each other).

These arguments can be heated and some of the attacks may sound vicious, but there’s nothing much to worry about from a safety angle, as they haven’t caught the attention of those outside the fan circles.

The theorising by turtles are also not inherently dangerous. c-turtles have mostly been careful about keeping their discussions among themselves. The only risk it may lead to in the future, that I can think of right now, is the associated YiZhan content on China-based websites (ex. Bilibili, Douyin), which has become fairly plentiful. YiZhan candies used to be relatively obscure given the guidelines of CP fans to keep them among themselves (they call this practice 圈地自萌, literally, drawing a circle on the ground and have fun in it by oneself). These days, however, anyone who’s curious can get a good sense of YiZhan’s story by browsing Bilibili.

This probably contributes to the continued growth of the turtle population; however, some of this content is created by non-turtles who seek viewership and have little concern over Gg and Dd’s safety. They are the ones who re-upload the BTS, for example, despite the repeated pleas and warnings by the “站姐”s—the superfans who take/purchase these videos—as well as the turtles to not do that. If these content creators go overboard, there’s a possibility that YiZhan content may get caught in the government’s “Eradicating Pornography and Illegal Publications”（掃黃打非) movement. The movement originated in the mid 2000s, and its recent waves have been used as pretext to remove LGBT+ and BL content on line (I will eventually set up a post re: those events). Just last month (2020 Dec), Bilibili has been explicitly named by the government for hosting questionable materials, which means it’s already under scrutiny. Sweeps performed on an entire website are usually broad-based enough that no specific individuals are targeted; however, the government also encourages, with financial incentives, the reporting of specific content and has set up a dedicated website for doing so. While all YiZhan content has no direct relation to Gg and Dd, removal of such content may cause an over-reaction from fans, which can, in turn, lead to accusations of poor fan management by Gg and Dd. Most people will also assume the YiZhan content to be created by turtles.

(Another example of how an alleged turtle mis-step can get the YiZhan fandoms and Gg and Dd tied to the 掃黃打非 movement: a few days ago, a Weibo post showed a photo of a hardcover version of an explicit BJYX fanfic, reportedly sold for profit, and GG haters were calling for an arrest for “illegal publication.” So far, there’s minimal noise on the issue, so it isn’t something to worry about. It can also be fake news, which is so bountiful on the platform and on every aspect of daily life that most die a very peaceful, very well-deserved death.).

Whether fan arguments / theories may affect Gg and Dd’s relationship (assuming they’re in a relationship) … my guess is, not much. Gg and Dd are busy people, unlikely to closely follow their fans’ discussions. Again, I expect effects to be felt only if the arguments get out of hand ~ as in, if they begin to involve the public and/or the government.

As for the question about what is being done to stop Gg being targeted: fan wars are incredibly common in China (as in everywhere else), and Gg and Dd’s aren’t special in that sense ~ it’s just that as turtles, we know about those surrounding Gg and Dd and they feel significant to us. No individuals can stop a fan war ~ all we can do is to not join these wars ourselves.

Personally, I think the international fan base of Gg and Dd, as solos and cpfs, have more chance to achieve peace than its Chinese counterparts — if they choose to want that. Popularity in China is not only quantified (which is likely true everywhere, by marketing departments), but very visibly so. Sales numbers, votes, traffic attributed to each idol are frequently released to the public, possibly to foster competition among fans and drive these numbers further upward. c-turtles’ demonstrated strong performance in pushing these metrics has made them a target to those who wish to have usurp their consumer power. They, therefore, have good reasons to be wary of anyone who try to sway them from their “turtle-ship”, whether to turn them into solos or to lure them into an entirely different fandom. The swaying messages are also not always obvious, not always a direct “your cp suck”. They can be subtle, many even come from netizens who appear to be fellow turtles, who may say “oh, maybe we (turtles) are wrong” or “we have to be realistic; Gg and Dd will never look at each other publicly again”—messages that cast doubt and sink morale in a fandom that’s already running an uphill battle. Remember: traditionally, CP fandoms are not expected or welcomed to last, and solos have been happy to (correctly) point out that the BTS, the origin of the most solid “evidences” of BJYXSZD, are getting older by the day. c-turtles can’t expect anyone else to help defend their ship if something happens, given CP fandoms’ lack of respectability, given YiZhan being a real person M/M pairing that is often frowned upon. So it’s understandable, to me at least, why c-turtles are on guard, and occasionally, clash with those who they feel may be trying to take away what they love.

i-turtles, I feel, don’t have that many reasons to fight. We don’t really have other fandoms (for example, the up and coming danmeis—the adapted BL dramas) vying for our attention (and wallets). No one can put an expiration date on the YiZhan communities except ourselves.

Another way to see this is: we—as in, the combined Gg + Dd international fanbase, the solos + CPFs—are lucky in a way the fans in Gg and Dd’s home country are not. Collectively, we’re much further removed from the pressure to perform as fans, which is immense in China with their fan circle culture and fan economy. i-shrimps and i-motorcycles ~ some of you are reading this, I think? (hello!) ~ here are my humble thoughts: the solo/turtle ratio of Gg and Dd’s international fans doesn’t make much of an impact on Gg and Dd’s star status, on the popularity metrics that matter. Our spending power is limited outside China’s borders, and while Gg and Dd likely love us equally as fans, our adoration for them doesn’t really matter much, if at all, to the production/media/commercial companies that control the trajectories of their careers.

Along this line, the turtles’ “double loyalty” doesn’t have much of an ill effect, because there are few popularity contests here that mean much; few times (if any) when the turtles must face the dilemma of whether to vote for Gg or Dd because only a single vote is allowed; few situations where they have only x amount of dollars and must split it equally between Gg or Dd’s endorsements. There’s also much less cause to worry that i-turtles may draw the attention, or ire of the Chinese government ~ the whole international fanbase is too far away, too spread out to destabilise the regime in any way.

What the turtles do have in common with you, the solos, is their knowledge, their love for Gg/Dd. Knowledge, in particular. The people who know about Gg/Dd are still far and in between—at where I am, at least, and my guess is, it’s likely true for many of you too. Think of the turtles as people who you can talk to about your favourite star in places where few people know about him, can help promote The Untamed far and wide—many people still haven’t heard of the show, and they deserve to.

For the turtles ~ no one can take away our turtle-ship identity, as long as we don’t give it away. No one can report on the our communities to the government and get them dissolved. Our votes, our spending habits are no one else’s business but ours here.

So, Anon, here’s what I think, and these are all very personal opinions, very personal decisions on how to navigate fandom …

I truly hope that we, as the international fanbase, can try to use this luck that we have. Make our communities not mere copies of their (combative) Chinese counterparts but something different, something with our own flavour, something with more peace and less fighting.

Specifically, I see little cause to try to persuade/dissuade anyone to be a solo/turtle. I find them… not the best use of time. Why? Because frankly, neither solos nor turtles have a better grasp of who Gg and Dd are. Neither solos nor turtles have a truly good grasp of who Gg and Dd are. These discussions are therefore bound to end up with more ill will than conclusions, since both sides are short of facts.

We’re all short of facts as audiences, who’ve all only seen a tiny sliver of who Gg and Dd are as human beings.

I don’t mean Gg and Dd’s star image is fake ~ it’s just that, their star image is their “work face”, and even I, a lowly turtle, must act somewhat differently in my own office. It’s part of being professional.

Gg and Dd’s star image are their professional face, and no professionals worth a salt truly ignore other’s opinions, especially when the profession is being an entertainer whose job is to face and hold the attention of the public.

This is true for Gg; this is true for Dd.

Social media accounts are also part of Gg and Dd’s professional face ~ whatever is posted on there will be scrutinised by millions of fans, and they know that. The posts do provide some insights about Gg an Dd’s personalities, but they can’t be expected to show a complete picture. No parts of these posts, therefore, whether it’s the content or the kadians, are sufficient evidences for / against any aspect of their personal lives (especially as private an aspect as their romantic lives). Anon, you mentioned promotional marketing materials, and here’s my understanding of them ~ ambassadors such as Gg and Dd have minimal control over their design. The shrimp-holding bunny you’re referring to, for example, is very likely provided by the company.

However, may I also add this? Please try to not think of the shrimps / motorcycles as enemies of the turtles. Millions of people are behind each of these labels, and true for any group of this size, a fraction of its members are bound to be annoying. A small fraction may be awful, even. But they don’t represent the entire group. The shrimps are not only Gg’s fans, many of them have supported him longer than any turtle (since turtle-ship can’t be older than 2018); they’re also the reasons why Gg is in the industry ~ they voted for him in X-Fire. Likewise, a subset of motorcycles have been with Dd since UNIQ; they were there when the Korean ban effectively dissolved his group; they stuck with him when he was attacked for taking on the role of LWJ.

We’re all Gg and Dd’s fans, if you ask people outside the fandom. Remember: few outside China understand why heated arguments can occur between a bunch of shrimps, turtles and motorbikes. (It sounds a bit kafkaesque, just typing it out.)

It’s important not to lose sight too, that Gg and Dd’s social media accounts, where many new candies are found, primarily function as bridges of communication between them and their fans. These accounts do have different degrees of “professionalism” ~ Weibo and the official accounts being more formal, and Oasis, Douyin being more laid back and intimate; still, they all serve similar purposes. They’re not candy generators, or a script Gg and Dd have an obligation to follow to confirm / refute BJYXSZD.

Also: these accounts are accessible and watched by the public, not all of whom are friendly to Gg and Dd.

Re: Gg’s drawing on Oasis. He used the account as it’s intended for—to interact with his fans (the caption of the first draft was an unspoken invitation to shower him with ideas) and maybe, to show off a little (it was a very nice piece of artwork ~ a comment that I, sadly, haven’t seen much of). I doubt he posted his drawing because he wanted fans to carpet-search for traces of Dd in it (even though he probably expected that would happen); I very much doubt he posted his drawing because he wanted his fans to fight over scratch marks or black dots.

If these fights keep happening, I can imagine a possible outcome. He’ll stop showing us his drawings. His social media accounts will become less and less personal, as they already have.

I’ll share with you my thoughts about candies too, while I’m at it. These are probably not-so-popular opinions, so please take them all with a grain of salt.(Salted caramels? 😊 )

I haven’t looked at why candies are called candies, but I find the name appropriate for how I think of them ~ candies are 1) neither evidences or truth, 2) sweet, 3) treats (non-essential, not like the main course).

The first point is, perhaps, the one I try the hardest to keep in mind. There are posts out there claiming the candies as made-beliefs—generated from edited pictures or videos, exaggerated translations, and their interpretations forced by “guidances” in the annotations/narration. There are also posts claiming that turtles are deceivers, or have been deceived by brainwashers who maliciously created these make-beliefs. A turtle may assume these posts are all lies, all made by antis.

But, speaking turtle-to-turtle, I’d venture to say this … there’s some truth in the *first* statement. Many candies do, indeed, taste different if their taster returns to the original source—not necessarily unsweet, but less sweet. Candies, remember, are generated by fans like you and I. Same for c-candies ~ they aren’t endorsed by Gg and Dd, aren’t necessarily closer to the truth just because of the relative proximity of their birthplaces to their leads.

Candy generation is The Tradition of CP fandoms. It’s a celebrated skill, and who doesn’t want to generate a candy that will be talked about, that will be part of the BJYX canon, for as long as the fandom lasts? Some fans are, therefore, also more … efficient in the “marketing” of the candies they generated — in persuading others that their candies are evidences, the truth. “Guidance” photos and videos (which pinpoint the place to watch, sometimes with appropriate sound effects for emphasis) have come about that way, and because they’re easy to digest—especially where language barriers exist—they end up spreading to i-fandoms.

These photos and videos may look more professional / trustworthy, but they often have an additional layer of subjectivity ~ on top of the already subjective opinion of what makes a candy. Translations (of BTS, fake rumours house content etc) also introduce a subjective element. Word choices can significant modify the tone of a conversation; speakers of different Chinese dialects may also have different interpretations of the same phrases. Example: I, as a non Chongqing/Sichuanese speaker, can guess the literal meaning of the “puppy” term Gg used for Dd — 狗崽崽 (gou zai zai) — but I also had to rely on others to tell me how endearing the term is; me being a Chinese speaker actually doesn’t make my interpretation any more valid, or authoritative, in this scenario, because my dialect doesn’t use this term at all.

It doesn’t mean the people who’ve put in the work have any less-than-good intent; the vast majority of them come from a place of deep love. It’s just that we all carry our own perspectives, and as fans, our strong emotions in our fanworks.

This is why candies are often insufficient as good “points” for arguments, why they fail to convince non-believers, sometimes to the disappointment of some turtles. As evidences, they aren’t objective enough; they’re also often touch upon the assumption that’s mark the fundamental difference between solo and cp fans — the assumption that Gg and Dd are (not) together. Take, for example, this segment from a (polite) ask I got from an anon solo:

All the matching clothes, jewelry, shoes etc. Stopped being valid candy when I realized that the brands have popular stars "endorse" their products. The lightning pendant? Other actors have also worn it. Does that mean they are in a 3-way with (Gg) and (Dd)? Probs not.

Solo anon was correct! Brands have star endorsers, and other entertainers have, indeed, worn the same lightning pendant. The implied argument is also valid: people who don’t care about, don’t even know about each other can wear the same things. Most of us do that on a daily basis with our mass-produced garments.

However, a counterargument can also be made to the statement above, and easily: even the most precious, most beautiful wedding rings (say, from Tiffany!) are not exclusive to the first RL couple who bought them. It doesn’t mean the first RL couple is sleeping with all the couples who bought the same rings afterwards, doesn’t mean those rings aren’t significant to every one of these couples as romantic mementos. More often than not, couples wear matching things not because these things are exclusive to them—because how often can one find things that only exist as a single pair in this world? They wear matching things because they want to see something on themselves that remind them of their significant other and so, as long as the things aren’t so prevalent that everyone is wearing them, they can already serve their purpose.

But you see, Anon, that arguing over this would’ve been a waste of time? Because the solo came in with the assumption that Gg and Dd were not a couple, and the counterargument was made with the assumption that they were. The pendants alone are insufficient to prove either side correct or wrong. No one knows why those pendants ended up on Gg and Dd’s necks, except Gg and Dd and their teams. If I were to argue with anon solo, we can go on and on and on until we’re both left with bitter tastes in our mouths and WWX-red in our eyes, and forget the one thing that really matters: we’re both Gg’s fans.

(We could’ve spent the time talking about how that scene in The Wolf with Ji Chong throwing Zai Xing in the water is ❤️.) (I can’t believe the script waited 30+ episodes to do it. 😂)

This leads to my second point, Anon. Candies are meant to be sweet, and they’re meant to be sweet for you. In Chinese, a term for an expert candy person is a 嗑學家 (the candy-eating in CP fandoms is called 嗑糖 (ketang) ～ with 嗑 ke denoting a specific form of eating that requires breaking something open first with teeth—such as watermelon seeds; a 嗑學家 is a 嗑 (ke)-ologist). A 嗑學家 isn’t someone who can recall the longest list of candies, or spread the most candies around, or convince the most people that the CP behind the candies is real; they are those who can find their own candies in a source material, and be overjoyed by the sweetness of their discoveries without outside help. To me, at least, this term encapsulates the subjective nature of candies ~ what’s right for you may not be right for me and vice versa, and that’s perfectly all right. In other words, there are many candies out there but you’re not required to believe in all of them; instead, you’re free to choose candies to your own liking, compose your own version of the BJYX canon that you love, that you find sweet.

Wait, but you may say. Doesn’t that make my canon fantasy? Yes and no, because candies are based on real events. They’re interpretations, which sit somewhere between reality and fantasy. They’re like … opinion shows on news channels.

But what if I need to convince people of my canon —

Your “opposition”’s canon is as fantastical, and as real as yours — maybe it isn’t, but neither of you have a way to prove it one way or another.

Wouldn’t solos call me delulu, or clowns?

Maybe. But one step outside the fandom, and all of us fans—solo and cpfs—are delulu, clowns.

(That’s why while I’ve used the cpn label, I haven’t called myself delulu, or a clown. Anyone who thinks I have the truth about the love story about a pair of idol I haven’t met from thousands of miles away … the joke’s probably on them, don’t you think?)

Of course and again, Anon, this is only my take! I like candies precisely because I like to watch the real-time generation of candies, which ones different people claim as their own, which candies fall away and which stick around in the fandom over time. As a fic writer, this ship has gifted me with a treasure trove of information ~ what do people think of as romantic gestures, as give-away signs of love? The fun/amazing part of BJYX is that candies are available for so many different answers to these questions. Some people think of longing gazes and sweet smiles; some think of touches that can’t be helped (the many, many, many “fights”); some think of service (buying foods, designing clothes); some think of caring about the other’s well-being (throat candies and dumplings + noodles + crackers); some think of being The Other’s One and Only Exception (Dd being so talkative around Gg, Gg being so … fussy around Dd); some think of expressions through the arts (songs, drawings, dances); some think of grand gestures (the wave heart in the ocean); some think of matching clothes and symbolic accessories (rings); some think of birthdays and anniversaries (314, 622, the first snow); some think of sharing life’s hassles and small tidbits (fake rumour house); some think of … just looking VERY good together. Etc etc.

Some think of a subset of these, some think of all of these…

(Personally, I’m a very picky candy eater. I know about many of them, but only a small fraction impresses on me.)

(Still, I love watching candies. I love watching the joy of people sweetened by them ~ or, when c-turtles exclaim kswl! — the short form of ke si wo le! 嗑死我了! I “ke”ed so much I’m dying!)

This gets to 3), Anon, and I apologise to you too, for answering your not-essay-at-all with an essay! Candies are, to me, treats, and I don’t expect them to come at any frequencies higher than treats do. The reason isn’t because I don’t like candies ~ I enjoy watching them, as I said, even if I don’t eat many of them; the reason is because I don’t expect anyone’s romantic love to leave a trace in everything they do. For example, if I truly find myself in a SZD/SJD discussion re: Gg’s drawing, I’d say the lack of Dd in Gg’s self-portrait doesn’t really mean much. Even if Gg and Dd were head-over-heels in love with one another, Gg doesn’t have to put Dd in everything he touches. Likewise, Dd doesn’t have to present a consistent, or decipherable story with his kadians. This is true for the real-life couples around us too, isn’t it? They don’t perform every single act in life leaving a noticeable trace of their significant other. And the misunderstanding that couples do that — that their romantic lives take over who they are as individuals — IMO, partially explains why people who choose to not to date or marry, people who’re aro-aces, often have a difficult time convincing others that they’re complete humans. Romantic love is, of course, very, very important and can be life altering, but it also isn’t everything about a person ~ especially not if a person who has a career as exciting as Gg’s and Dd’s. Gg and Dd who also have friends, family, (many) talents and interests …

(And lots of ugly icons on their cell phones. Yes, I’m talking about you, Gg. That long-armed Pepe from your 2018 snowless Beijing post will give me nightmares…)

#pie metas #pie answers #yizhan #BJYX

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theplanetprince · 3 years

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Fanfiction Review

I can already tell this is gonna be super confusing bc I've been writing fic since I was 12 but have since gone through so many identity changes. But let's play anyway!

Thanks for the tag @redead-red

1. How many works do you have on AO3?

My current library is 8. I don't actually write fanfic too often unless a specific idea intrigues me-- or something in the fanon just doesn't line up with me. I do have at least 4ish more stories planned and maybe a revised version of an ancient story from when I was young. 2. What’s your total AO3 word count?

166,451! Pretty neato!

3. How many fandoms have you written for, and what are they?

Uh, in no specific order,

Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles (lost to purging)

Doctor Who (you ain't gonna find these)

Sonic

NiGHTs into Dreams

Dead by Daylight (<3)

Danny Phantom (my beloathed) Supernatural (my other beloathed)

and uhhhh, I think a bunch of various other video games I can't remember. For the sake of brevity I'm gonna put the rest under the cut.

4. What are your top 5 fics by kudos?

This is actually pretty funny bc I have so few fics released. I only get emails for certain ones all the time, so I wrote this part out by guessing, but I ended up not needing to change it. (also, don't read most of these; they're old and bad)

1. Schrodinger's Adolescent, 337 Kudos (Danny Phantom)

2. Teen Years and How to Survive Them, 97 Kudos (Secret Trio)

3. Two Fake Feds Come up the Laneway the other dayyyyyy, 56 Kudos (Letterkenny/Supernatural)

4. Brother's Keeper, 40 Kudos (Halloween, DBD)

5. Beginner's Guide to Destroying the Moon, 37 Kudos (Sonic)

5. Which of your fic do you want more attention for?

I'll be real here, I still enjoy most of the work I did for both Beach House Bummer, and Beginner's Guide to Destroying the Moon. I just wish I got more love for the latter bc I might be inspired to finish it lmao.

6. Do you respond to comments, why or why not?

I really try to! I love the long rambly comments I get on Schrodinger's because I can feel those people are giving me the same passion I put into my work-- Though most of the time I get the generic "post more" or "update plz" which I dunno I'm grateful for the interaction. Still, I don't really want to repeat like "I'm trying my best, dude." about 12 times a day.

7. What’s the fic you’ve written with the angstiest ending?

I'll be real I only have two completed fics rn-- but I can tell you I had this one fic that I wrote when I was fourteen where the ninja turtles had to burn down a lab full of half-born mutant embryos, and like I remember writing that and then going to middle school the next day like "They don't know I'm a literary genius."

8. Do you write crossovers? What’s the craziest one you’ve written?

Probably the Letterkenny/Supernatural crossover-- I feel very strongly about SPN and how people take it way too seriously, so when I found out it was filmed in Canada. It used famous Canadian actors from the show Letterkenny, it felt way too good to pass up. I do hope to write in that space again when I'm feeling less depresso-espresso.

9. Have you ever received hate on a fic?

Yeah. It's probably a big reason why you'll never see the tmnt fics for a while. I also used to write a lot of OC stories, and this was back in 2014 so like those were def hit the hardest. I'm glad to say it's like... subsided for the most part. I don't get hate as much as I just get really confusing and creepy comments, which don't hurt my rejection-sensitive-ass as much.

10. Do you write smut? If so, what kind?

Hahahaha, no.

I am kind of bad at writing it, and I don't really like writing it. Which yeah that makes sense. My friends sometimes when they find out I write fanfic as a joke they'll send me some of the worst examples smut they can find and to test my talent I'll try to rewrite it to make it some kind of titillating-- but alas it just isn't my forte. The cons of being an asexual I guess.

11. Have you ever had a fic translated?

Uh, yes and no? I think I had one of my older fics stolen, retranslated, and then retranslated again to English? That was so long ago tho.

12. Have you ever co-written a fic before?

No, but I'd love to give it a shot sometime.

13. What’s your all-time favorite ship?

Honestly, it's sonadow. I know it's cringe but I'm free, dammit. Outside of that I guess my favorite dynamic is jock/nerd, which you've probably gleaned from my resume here fhsdkjf.

14. What’s a WIP that you want to finish but don’t think you ever will?

I've been working on Teen Years and How to Survive them since I was 16, I only started making headway on it when I was 19-- so I feel like that speaks for itself hskjhg.

15. What are your writing strengths?

It's been told to me that I'm very funny and I write convincing dialog that captures a character's voice. Which is extremely flattering despite the fact that I feel like I'm tricking you all.

16. What are your writing weaknesses?

probably scenery and landscape, if I'm honest. I also accidentally keep creating scenes just for the dialog instead of action or environment.

17. What are your thoughts on writing dialogue in other languages in a fic?

I think as long as I can guess what they're saying from context clues, and the writer is courteous enough to include body language and the like, then it's mostly harmless. I love including a bunch of references in fic whether it's cultural, historical, or just like a quote from a movie or something so I have a bunch of tabs open regardless it wouldn't be too inconvenient for me to fire up google translate or something.

18. What was the first fandom you wrote for?

Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles!

19. What’s your favorite fic you’ve written?

Probably Schrodinger's Adolescent, it really opened up a lot of doors for me in the DP fandom and I got to meet a lot of cool people because of it. It really cheered me up from a dark place. And despite me writing it initially out of anger and spite its grown into this soft thing that really means a lot to me.

20. What fic are you most proud of?

Honestly, I can't pick. I'm both embarrassed by them all and yet glad they bring people some form of comfort.

Uhhhh who to tag-- I don't really know

@ten0rreaper is the only one I can think of-- whoever else I guess can have at it. I'm not very good at these things lmao.

#tag game #txt

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wonderfulworldofmichaelford · 3 years

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Michael in the Mainstream: Crash Bandicoot

Reviewing video games is not my forte. Like, sure, I can review the Metal Gear franchise because it’s near and dear to my heart and it’s incredibly story driven to a cinematic degree, but I’m not super good at touching on game design or any of that. I stick with movies. But then there are a lot of games I love and want to talk about, such as this game, Crash Bandicoot, and it’s like, how do I talk about this? This is a platformer that is very light on plot and is more about precision platforming than anything, and I’m just not really good at talking about gameplay.

But I’ve come up with a solution! One that I plan to use going forward for a few other games, too! I’ll start with a few paragraphs with my basic overview of the game, and then I will do a ranking of my favorite levels, and then how I’d rank the bosses. I’m much better at talking why I enjoy the challenge of specific elements of games like these then I am talking about the game as a whole, so let’s see how this turns out.

Crash Bandicoot was the first video game I ever played, and so is extremely near and dear to my heart. It’s a rather simple game, a “save the girl” platforming adventure in the vein of something like Mario, where an intrepid hero travels through platforming challenges to save the love of his life from an evil mastermind, though as the main character is a furry animal with a bit of 90s ‘tude, and his archenemy is a mad scientist who utilizes cyborgs to stop you, there’s a dash of Sonic in here too. Being a simple platforming game like this, you’d think there wouldn’t be all that much to the story… but surprisingly, that’s not totally the case (although the story is still relatively simple to later entries).

Crash was meant to be the ultimate soldier in Dr. Neo Cortex’s army of evil marsupials and other assorted critters, an army he presumably was going to use for world domination. After rigorous training, Crash was set to be brainwashed and turned into a mindless slave, but something got screwed up and Crash remained a good, heroic guy. He ended up chased out a window and washed up on the beach of a nearby island, and set out to save his buxom, big booty bandicoot babe Tawna from the creepy clutches of the cantankerous Cortex, causing chaos and crushing crates as he went along. The manual included with the original version of the game actually outlined sort of a little story for the first island, showing how the levels involved Crash infiltrating a native village, defeating its leader, and then riding a hog to escape on his way to the next island. It’s kind of fun and imaginative, and the next island keeps it up, with Crash having to brave ancient ruins to make it to the volcano on the other side of the island, before finally going through Cortex’s toxic power plant, causing a reactor meltdown, and climbing Cortex’s castle to confront him as his island burns to the ground. It’s a fun, simple story that’s not too challenging on the mind while still being engaging.

Perhaps the best thing about the game is the music, which was done by Josh Mancell with the assistance of Mark Mothersbaugh’s Mutato Muzika production company. Let’s not beat around the bush here: Every single track in this game slaps. Basically every track in the original trilogy slaps, but I feel pound for pound this game just hits all the right notes with its music. It perfectly sets the tone for each level, with eerie levels like Slippery Climb getting foreboding music and unsettling yet somewhat whimsical levels like Road to Nowhere getting music that perfectly suits it. This is the biggest downgrade of the remake; they redid the score, with no option to go back to the old tracks, and while some of the updated tunes are great, they don’t really hold a candle to the original (especially the creepier levels, which got dumbed down a fair bit to the point of narm).

The one thing this game is being known for these days is its pretty brutal difficulty, at least with the original release. A lot of the staple elements of the series like checkpoints saving the boxes you had previously broken and an actual save room were not present, so every level (including the brutal ones where the margin of error was incredibly slim) needed to be completed perfectly in one go. The challenging road to 100% completion was absolutely brutal, but thankfully the remake polished things and brought it more in line with its sequels to the point you only need a flawless run on colored gem levels. It can still be pretty tough since the colored gems are located in the hardest levels of the game, but it’s a lot easier than it once was.

The original game is a great, fun game, but only play the original release if you really want to test your skills; the remake is the way to go. The game holds up amazingly well even today, so no matter which version you end up playing you’re in for a fun platforming challenge.

Anyway, let’s get on to the levels!

TOP 10 LEVELS

10. Generator Room

There’s something to be said about the various one-shot themed levels of the third island. Toxic Waste is an interesting one we’ll talk about later, The Lab is a fun penultimate level, and Cortex Power is a frustrating slog of confusing backtracking. The Generator Room, though? This is unnerving atmosphere and dark ambience at its peak, with the eerie, minimalist music and the looming Cortex faces lending a chilling sense that you’re being watched as you make your way through this dark platforming challenge. It’s not the most exciting level, but among the one-shot themes it stands out for being a heaping helping of nightmare fuel… Though moreso in the original game. The remake sadly toned things down a bit too much, though it’s hard to blame them, really.

9. Native Fortress

The level that caps off the first island is a more challenging remake of The Great Gate, and closes out the story of the first island by showing how Crash escapes the territory of Papu Papu’s tribe. It’s a pretty fun and reasonable challenge for the point in the game, but my favorite aspect of the level has always been that, when you get the red gem, you get to fly up in the clouds and experience the painted background of the other two islands with less clutter. It’s just a simple background image, sure, but I have always found it very pretty and breathtaking.

8. Road to Nowhere

Everyone’s favorite! This is one of the more challenging levels if you don’t know what you’re doing because of the tricky and precise jumps you need, but it just has so much atmosphere and pleasant music it’s hard to get mad even if I screw up and plummet to my doom a few dozen times. Bouncing off of hibernating turtles to make long jumps and inexplicable evil hogs help make this memorable. Frankly, if you want to direct your ire to a stage, direct it to The High Road, the third island’s more challenging take on this level’s theme and which is a joyless, frustrating experience.

7. Castle Machinery

This level is honestly a bit of a breather for being so late in the game; sure, it has a lot of tricky jumps and an annoying crate bridge you need to really think about to conquer, but overall it’s just an improved take on Heavy Machinery without an obtuse branching path to figure out. Still, this level really makes the list because, if you have the right colored gem, you can just immediately skip the entire level and gain thirty free lives in the process in one of the single funniest moments in the game.

6. Toxic Waste

This level is simple, straightforward, and to the point. It’s one long-ass hallway where Crash is on a narrow walkway and has to avoid incoming barrels being tossed at him by the Mafia. It has no branching paths, no crazy elements, just Crash, some barrels, some boxes, and some bad guys. It’s almost too basic, but what saves it is the atmosphere of it all and the sheer awesomeness of the music, no matter which version you’re playing. It’s a level that has stuck in my mind since I was a kid. In a way, it also set the basis for colored gem unlocks in the games to follow, as avoiding the barrels is more of a puzzle than anything, much like the tricky puzzles you had to solve to unlock the colored gems in Cortex Strikes Back and It’s About Time. It’s a neat little first step even if it’s not quite there yet.

5. Boulder Dash

I almost didn’t include one of these levels, but God, these levels were trendsetters! The whole “Crash gets chased by dangerous thing” trend began in this game, and this second take on the boulder chase from the second island is a lot more fun and challenging than the earlier version of the level. And if you get the colored gem, you’re taken to a pretty underground alternate exit with tons of crates, which is pretty dope.

4. Fumbling in the Dark

The only one of the secret levels that requires a Cortex key to make the list, Fumbling in the Dark is a remix of Lights Out, the level it branches off of. That level is a bit of a cakewalk if you have the right gem, with an alternate exit being available to you before the level’s challenge ramps up. Not so with this level! You’ve gotta do some tricky timed jumps as quick as possible so you can get to the next Aku Aku mask before the light runs out. It’s a pretty fun and fair challenge, and it pushes my platforming skills to the limit. I also just really enjoy the creepy, Gothic aesthetic of the levels inside Cortex’s castle.

3. Hog Wild

This is, hands down, the funniest level in the game. From Crash’s really suggestive eyebrow waggle which leads to him tackling a pig to the extremely goofy music, this level is just an absolute blast. It does have an equally fun yet more challenging remix as an optional secret level, Whole Hog, but I have to give props to the original level for being the most hilarious thing I ever saw when I was little.

2. Slippery Climb

Where Stormy Ascent is a brutal, unrelenting challenge, Slippery Climb is more of a tough, but fair challenge. It’s definitely up there with Sunset Vista and The High Road in terms of difficulty, and the fact you’ve gotta do a flawless run of it if you want the red gem is daunting, but this is the most thoroughly rewarding mandatory level to conquer. You’re gonna feel really cool when you take this one down, guaranteed. Maybe not as much as when you take down Stormy Ascent, but still, this may be the toughest level in the game.

1. THE GREAT HALL

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WOO YEAH BABY! LOOK AT THIS CHALLENGE!

Ok, ok, here’s the real number one:

1. N. Sanity Beach

This is the first level in the game and, thus, one of the easiest. And yet I placed it above all the levels I find to be more fun and challenging. Why? Well, for one, the pure nostalgia of it all. This was my first level in a video game, and I have fond memories of traversing the beach and jungle. For the other, this is one of the most perfect tutorial levels I have ever seen. Basically everything the game has to offer is laid out to you and slowly dished out to you: you start with a couple crates and a free life, move on to experience some enemies and pits, you can get total invincibility if you’re smart, you’re introduced to branching paths and backtracking… Everything is dished out to you at a solid pace so that any new player will be able to figure out what they’re doing with relative ease. Plus, the music slaps, and interestingly enough halfway through the level changes to a different song (the only level to do this). It really does encapsulate the game as a whole in one tiny package, and for that, I think it’s my favorite level of all.

Boss Ranking

The best way to describe the bosses in the original Crash is that they are incredibly basic. Most of them have simple patterns, easy tells, and don’t take much effort to take down. There’s not really anything here that will put your skills to the test, but none of them are really bad per se; in fact, considering how hard the levels can get, it’s sort of a breath of fresh air when you get to a boss that can be taken down without thinking hard.

6. Papu Papu

Coming in last place is our first boss, the big chief of the first island himself. He’s a pretty simple and straightforward boss battle: just jump on his head a few times and he’ll be out cold. It’s pretty nice to ease in new players, but it’s seriously not much of a challenge (though none of these bosses are particularly hard, mind you).

5. Koala Kong

So far, this has been Koala Kong’s sole major outing, as he was pretty quickly replaced with the more engaging Tiny Tiger in terms of dumb muscle.Tiny at least has some semblance of combat prowess and strategy, while this guy is just tossing boulders at you to spin back while he’s flexing and posing like he wants a part in the next volume of JoJo’s Bizarre Adventure. He’s certainly not the sharpest tool in the shed. Still, he’s not bad or anything, just a bit of a generic battle compared to the last three or the one before him.

4. Ripper Roo

Ripper Roo is a bit of a frustrating puzzle boss, requiring just the right timing to get in any damage on the guy. Still, the fun and bouncy music coupled with the amazing stock laugh does help make him a bit more memorable than the previous two bosses. I will say he’s probably worse in terms of an actual boss battle, because he ends up being more an exercise in precision than the typical dodging and waiting for the right moment to strike, but he’s also a funny kangaroo in a straitjacket, and I think that counts for something.

3. N. Brio

The longest boss in the game, Brio comes with a massive health bar that you’ll shave off pretty quickly for his first phase if you’re careful, and whose second phase features him hulking out into an incredible monstrosity. He’s simple and straightforward, much like all the bosses to be honest, but I think the bosses on the final island all have solid presentation to make up for that. Brio just comes out at the lower end, which is honestly a running theme for him in Crash games, as his battles are rarely the best out there and few can match his debut.

2. Pinstripe

Pinstripe may not be the most challenging boss in the world, but damn is he cool. A tommy gun-toting potoroo gangster who goes full-on Scarface and starts blasting up his office when you walk in while cackling like a madman? Awesome. Defeating him is also heavily implied to be the reason Cortex’s castle eventually starts burning down, as he accidentally shoots the generator upon defeat, which is a neat little touch. If nothing else, Pinstripe is just fun, and he has killer theme music to boot.

1. Cortex

Cortex begins his reign as the big bad of the franchise with a final boss battle that, while lacking in serious challenge, has such good music and presentation that it’s hard to really care. The fight is simple and straightforward: you dodge his blasts, and hit back the ones of a certain color so they blast his health off. All of this is done from atop his dirigible, as his island burns down in the background. The bosses just don’t get any cooler than this.

#Michael in the Mainstream #review #video game review #Crash Bandicoot #Naughty Dog #Platformer #nostalgia

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aspiringprofessionalnerd · 4 years

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Wei Wuxian and the Trauma of the Burial Mounds

Sorry folks I am officially In My Feels after therapy this week, and then I came online this afternoon to see that @hunxi-guilai has knocked it out of the park with their analysis again. I love to see that people are talking about the portrayal of WWX’s trauma on a larger level, and I wanted to add my two cents:

Pre-Resurrection

First of all, I want to acknowledge that WWX is far from the only person who experiences trauma throughout the course of CQL ahem Jiang Cheng . Even WWX endures various types of trauma throughout his first life. But what I’m so impressed (and gutted) by is the way in which the show establishes that it is WWX’s first stint in the Burial Mounds specifically that breaks him (or, at least, catalyses his breakdown).

We know WWX has had a difficult childhood and teen years. He lost his parents at a young age and had to survive on the streets for an unspecified amount of time, facing physical and logistical hardships like running from dogs and battling starvation (no cultivation training yet, so no opportunity to train inedia) as well as the grief of losing his parents. Yet, remarkably, aside from his lingering fear of dogs, these incidents don’t seem to leave too many lasting physical or emotional scars. WWX is able to jump around and play with his adoptive brother on his first night at Lotus Pier, and when we see him in his teen years at Cloud Recesses Summer Camp he is a warm, bubbly individual with no reservations about physical contact (on the contrary, he’s more gung-ho about it than LWJ would like). He remains open to new experiences and new people, and even though he uses humour to obfuscate at times, the people close to WWX can still see through to his deeper intentions (take, for example, Yanli reminding Jiang Cheng that WWX is serious about the important things). Moreover, once the Jiang siblings and WWX return to Lotus Pier, we gain a greater appreciation for the past things WWX has survived, including years of verbal abuse some awkward family dynamics. Madam Yu’s words obviously hurt him, but even so he bounces back almost immediately and diverts his attention to comforting Jiang Cheng despite the fact that he is still recovering from Teenage Mutant Murder Turtle injuries himself. I think there is an important distinction to be made here: it’s not that criticism and harsh conditions just roll off of WWX. He DOES process and internalise them, but he keeps going and maintains his faith and openness in spite of having these negative experiences. Clearly, he is a remarkably resilient person.

After the massacre at Lotus Pier and Jiang Cheng’s loss of his golden core, we see WWX wrestle with more complex emotions: grief, guilt, and concern. It’s obvious that Wei Wuxian is suffering acutely, but he’s still doing it in a way that’s very true to his character as we know it. He’s crying. He’s seeking physical comfort from Yanli. He’s proactive, looking to plan and problem-solve. Yes he balks a little at what JC’s core recovery will involve, but his overall reaction is primarily one of satisfaction and relief.

We don’t see too much of WWX between the mountaintop ordeal and his dropping into the Burial Mounds, but I think we have enough material to say that he is still in command of his own mind and maintains his sense of agency. You can tell that our Wee Sweaty Boi has been through the wringer, but he’s still quite animated and even cheeky when facing off against Wen Chao and Wen Zhuliu in the teahouse. That dog speech? Damn. Classic WWX. He might die, but he’s not going down without getting the last word. It’s only when they are all riding swords to the weirdest and most out of place glam rock score in the entire series wtf over the Burial Mounds that we see an inkling of genuine horror cross WWX’s face.

Take now, by contrast, WWX’s reactions and interactions post-Burial Mounds. His flinchy moments inspired such a visceral reaction in me. I’m a repeat trauma survivor as well, and when I saw the way that WWX jerked back from NHS’s hand, it was deeply uncomfortable to watch precisely because of how familiar it was. This is an instinctive, almost animalistic response to touch, and it’s a FEAR response. Moreover, this isn’t some rando about to bump into him; this is one of his best friends from childhood. This is the reaction of someone who has survived by believing that the only possible safe space he has is within the confines of his own body; if anyone touches that, it will shatter. Wei Wuxian’s logical mind can tell him that NHS is not a threat, but his trauma-brain can’t turn off the panic simply by knowing that. (And why should he trust his logical mind, anyway? As we get glimpses of in the first few moments of the Burial Mounds, it’s as much the voices of people he knows and loves as the voices of unnamed resentful souls that prey on him during those three months. The psychological trauma in the Burial Mounds was not just the introduction of external threats, but the convoluting of things WWX knew and loved into instruments of torture so that even once he returned to the world, he could not shake those negative associations.)

We get an equal-but-opposite illustration of WWX’s trauma in instances like his reunion with JC and LWJ or his soup session with Yanli. There’s a deadness behind the eyes, an uncanny stillness. Wei Wuxian is in survival mode, going through the motions of what ‘should’ be his return to normal life but wondering why it doesn’t feel right this time. Wei Wuxian had told himself in the Burial Mounds that all he needed to do was survive the Burial Mounds themselves and then everything would be alright: he would go back to Lotus Pier, JC would be healed, and he would make up a new version of the plan that had been shot to hell (I’m convinced that WWX DID originally have a plan for how to navigate life in Lotus Pier post-golden core; however, he never got to put that plan into place because he got dumped into the Burial Mounds before he could enact it). But Wei Wuxian returns, and what he’s told himself isn’t true, because in all his planning for returning to Yunmeng he didn’t account for the fact that what it took to get there would fundamentally alter him. As a result, Wei Wuxian doesn’t fit anymore--not because the world has changed, but because Wei Wuxian has changed. And he can’t talk about that with anyone.

Why not? Sure, in part it’s because he feels bound to keep the secret about Jiang Cheng, but I think there’s another aspect here that’s been significantly overlooked: namely, that Wei Wuxian is the ONLY person to survive the Burial Mounds in any kind of living cultural memory. The problem isn’t so much that he can’t tell people as it is an issue of no one being able to understand or relate to his experiences even if he did share them. After all, how do you convey to an outsider what it was like to survive for three months in a place where every single bit of torture was customised to draw on YOUR individual, personal fears and hurts? Significantly, this is also the point in the story where we see Wei Wuxian begin to answer questions by in turn asking, ‘Would you believe me if I told you...?’ The question is rhetorical: he doesn’t expect people to believe him (although it still hurts when they don’t), but even if they do believe, it’s still not enough because they don’t understand. IMO, the rest of WWX’s issues leading up to the cliff at Nightless City stem from him trying--and failing--to come to terms with the loneliness of that knowledge.

Post-Resurrection

After WWX comes back, we see a shift in him. He’s no longer focused on the fact that no one will understand him; he’s decided that having someone (namely LWJ) believe him is enough. This resolves many of the auxiliary issues that had been plaguing WWX before his death, but it does NOT resolve the original trauma of his first experience in the Burial Mounds. WWX continues to have nightmares, and what are they about? Not Lotus Pier. Not Qiongqi Way and his sense of guilt. Not Shijie getting stabbed right in front of his face. Not his final, distraught moments with LWJ and JC. Nope, his nightmares continue to revolve around falling into the Burial Mounds all those years ago: an experience for which even death and rebirth are insufficient to ease the pain.

I’m convinced that even at the end of CQL Wei Wuxian still has a LOT of healing to do, and I think this healing is not something that can happen through Lan Zhan’s love alone. Thank goodness for fanfic and headcanons, eh?

**Gentle reader, this turned out to be more like 50 dollars than two cents. Thank you for reading to the end if you’re still with me!

TL;DR I believe Wei Wuxian’s turning point moment in the story is his dumping into the Burial Mounds. It’s easy to get swept up in how many terrible things happen to him AFTER that in the lead-up to Nightless City, but I genuinely think he could have endured the loss of his Jiang family, the censure of LWJ, and society turning against him if he had not been psychologically broken during his first three months there. The writers, directors, and Xiao Zhan give us a very raw, real version of what trauma looks like with their depiction of post-Burial Mounds WWX, and it is utterly harrowing.

#cql #xiao zhan #big angst vibes #the untamed #meta #wei wuxian #i've edited this too many times because i'm a perfectionist #but it's still a mess because i've picked up slang from each country i live in #also talking about my own feelings?#nope don't like that one bit #projecting hard #ptsd #mdzs

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brightlotusmoon · 4 years

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Dear TMNT Fandom,

I am a panromantic demisexual demigirl in my forties who 1) didn't even know those terms until recently, calling myself a bisexual who didn't want casual sex for a decade, and 2) found some memories from the late 90s of conversations with folks with ties to Mirage Studios, and I need to say this:

I cannot believe we as a fandom have to explain that the Ninja Turtles, fantasy creatures, can be headcanoned as Asexual not just because it is a real thing and not weird like some are saying, but because specifically the original Mirage Turtles were asexual, not attracted to humans, and as the series went on and they grew up, more concerned with their own unique bond as the only members of their kind over romantic relationships.

For example: Mike's fling with the Styracodon princess Seri was a manipulation, and Future Leonardo being with Raven Shadowheart was a choice. They're still asexual, even maybe gray or demi. We never got to know if Seri's eggs were Mikey's but we know he didn't have feelings for her.

In all the cartoon versions, we see various relationships happen which reflect some of the era and audience. Great example is 2012.

Actually, since Peter hated romance and Kevin was the one to sign off on the Next Mutation which was the straw that broke the camel's back for their split, we know Kevin is supportive of a lot of headcanons, even the actually weird ones, and thanks to my brain suddenly yelping "holy shell I remember that" I know how a lot of TMNT franchise crew members support inclusive headcanons even if they might not be canon. So someone saying "why are fan writers and artists making the turtles ace [or trans or NB], I think it's so weird" is absolutely one of the more bizarre things to come from the fandom. Because... they're turtles. They're mutants. Hell, to get super technical they're essentially genetically aliens, since the mutagen was created by aliens and fused with their DNA. They have more turtle in them than human. They're not human, the actual entire point of the characters, so the other entire point is how they learn to become psychologically and socially human, which rules to follow, which morals to have that don't need to be human. Thus, it extends to fans who create Alternate Universes and Canon Divergent worlds. And asexuality, the ace spectrum, is a real world thing that has always existed even if we didn't always know the words. To try to insist that these not-real fantasy creatures - ones that don't exist, have no bearing on real life except our imaginations, and should't be so restricted - cannot represent orientations and identities for fans who share with fans is, at the very least, disingenuous, controlling, upsetting, and exasperating.

I didn't spend nearly thirty years fighting oppression as both LGBTQIA and disabled to see my my favorite fandom pushed against by aphobia, transphobia, and bullying in general.

Although, really, I am a fool, I should have seen all this. I know Tumblr is completely different than other platforms, completely different from my Olde Fann favorites like Livejournal and the old Geocities forums, and online social communities are now faster than, say, my ADHD thoughts in a hyperfocus, but I still want to be Old Man Yells At Cloud and Get Off My Lawn You Kids when it comes to this very specific fandom thing and I totally see how weird that is on its face. I've been studying neuropsychology a lot, I usually notice my own weirds and faults more than usual.

Anyway. Aaanyway. Uh. So. *exhales*

Haa, panic attacks are the worst, aren't they? Also, I gotta stop believing the depression and anxiety monsters in my head, they take up too much real estate and I'm tired and getting too old for this weird AAAAAA-ness.

(One of my inner voices is like, "Woman, you are talking about ninja mutant turtle creatures that were created as a parody of gritty superheroes, who are you calling weird and AAAA?" and all I can do is shrug with a "you got me smile" and a long sigh. But I try, oh my god do I try, all the time, in this institution - *pause to break into song I said hey hey hey* - and I keep learning from my fictional sunshine child as I go so I can keep up with all the So Which Of My Identities Is Being Threatened In Society This Time discourse and especially the memes. All the memes.

I am a cautious optimist, after all. Nihilistic Optimist maybe? All I know is my entire life is multiple piles of junk cluttering a small room and everything is shiny even when it's hidden in shadows. Just smile until it feels better.

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agaming164 · 3 years

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How often building new gaming pc

Considering Moving To Computer Gaming?

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clumsyclifford · 3 years

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11, 15, 17! love you!

hi mandie, i love you so much <3

11. describe your ideal day. mm im not sure i can!! it depends on my mood and my surroundings and, i don’t know, the version of me that exists at that moment?? i guess?? i can say it would probably include some number of the following: listen to good music, possibly while driving, hanging out with my family like having family dinner or something, mmm maybe watching a tv show i like, good snacks, lots of tea, maybe alex gaskarth would be present. i don’t know!

15. five most influential books over your lifetime.

a little princess by frances hodgson burnett no doubt (surprise surprise lol), sara crewe taught me how to be a selfless person and to give people the benefit of the doubt and how to check your privilege and.......yeah

oh this is a weird one and i honestly wouldn’t have thought of it if i hadn’t just glanced at my bookshelf out of nowhere but spilling ink by anne mazer and ellen potter. i read it when i was like. probably thirteen? and ive retained a handful of things from it but the main thing is that the book recommends keeping a journal (as a way to become a better writer) so i started keeping a journal and now, fffffive or six (?) years later, i STILL keep a journal and it’s the best thing i couldve done for myself honestly

the paradox of vertical flight by emil ostrovski. just because......i mean, it’s one of my favorite books. it taught me something about philosophy. and also i just like it lol

i am having some difficulty with this question actually wtf why have i not been influenced by books??? okay well i’m gonna say anything by john green here, maybe specifically an abundance of katherines just bc that’s my favorite (or turtles all the way down) because his writing style really, really inspires me to write. like...if i was going to be a writer, i’d want to be like john green. and i fucking love reading his writing

yknow what? lauren yanofsky hates the holocaust by leanne lieberman. BECAUSE the main character of this book (lauren yanofsky lol) has views on judaism and being jewish that are so insanely similar to mine it’s crazy. would you believe i don’t see myself (specifically my judaism) reflected in a lot of media? so this book was..........yeah. ALSO i used it as a source for my final paper in one of my classes last year lol

17. would you say your tumblr is a fair representation of the “real you”? mmmmm yes and no? well, assuming we’re talking about THIS tumblr, not like any tumblr i have........it’s complicated i guess? it represents my CHARACTER very well, i think. but it doesn’t do a great job showcasing all the various things i am interested in and love. like, since this is a 5sos (/atl) blog, that’s the majority of what goes on here, which is cool !! i love those things. but it does disproportionately represent how much i like those things compared to other things in my life that i like just as much but that you wouldn’t guess (unless you were a dedicated follower and had seen me enthusiastically talking about the nationals or musical theatre or writing music and playing guitar or acappella or, you know). but that’s cool !! it’s cool with me !! like it’s not that anyone is STOPPING me talking about those things (and i DO talk about them, a lot, lmao), it’s just not the point of the blog, which i knew when i made it. so in short: yes and no dghkjdfsghklgmsj

identity asks :)

#boy this got long #sorry fhklgjsfklmfsdhkj #the books thing was HARD #cakelftv #ask #answered

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fire-fira · 5 years

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More TMNT Junk (this time 2003 post-canon!)

[Ao3 version]

Soooooo I was vaguely thinking about posting this, and then I saw shit that the soggy cheetoh’s doing on my dash, and decided screw it-- to temporarily shove aside that unpleasant BS here’s some more TMNT stuff.

(Full disclaimer, most of this came from me babbling to @sounddrive about this concept. Plus a couple added things thanks to @babblingweirdnonsense. Because why the hell not?)

Just imagine the 2003 turtles living a ridiculously long time. I mean ridiculously long. Like still going strong when they’re around 121. (You can’t really tell me that it couldn’t happen when the Ninja Tribunal are thousands of years old and still look like they’re in their 30s-40s. If they can do it, so can these boys.)

It might be their mutation or it might be their level of chi control (or it might be both), and somehow Usagi's hanging on as long as they have (because separating Leo from his husband after that long would be cruel).

Yes you read that right, we’re going full-on Leosagi/katanashipping for this.

Of course with them being so old that brings up the question of why they wouldn’t have been present for the events of season 6 (since most of it takes place 100 years after they were 18). But I’ve got an explanation for that!

20 years prior to those events they got caught up in a war in Usagi's world and got stuck there. It wasn't supposed to become a war-- it was probably originally just supposed to be a vacation, time away from loud city noises and all that-- but nope! One thing led to another and escalated out of control, and they couldn't turn their backs because that wouldn't be fair-- and then some pain-in-the-ass magic user tried to trap them in that world (maybe to make sure they couldn't get reinforcements).

- Needless to say, they weren’t happy about that.

- So much inventive swearing from Raph. SO MUCH.

Plus Mikey probably adopting who knows how many kids. Because it’s Mikey and he’d hate the idea of leaving any orphaned kid behind when he can do anything about it.

- Though of course this is in addition to any kids he had already adopted over the decades who were spread out over their world and Usagi’s. So he just ends up with even more kids even though he’s already a grandpa... and a great-grandpa... and very likely a great-great-grandpa.

- Mikey will not be stopped.

- Leo and Usagi probably also have their own gaggle of adopted kids/grandkids/great-grandkids (although some actually related to Usagi through his son Jotaro, which is the family secret everyone pretends not to know, at least in Usagi's world), but they've got nothing on the sheer number of children and babies Mikey has taken in. There've been jokes that Mikey alone is going to completely rebuild the Hamato clan just through the number of kids he takes in.

Donnie in Usagi’s world mourns his lack of access to the tech he's used to, but he's been figuring out work-arounds. Mainly because sometimes when he's out in the field he wants nothing more than to just electrocute someone in a fight. What scares others is that he's got several nieces/nephews/etc. who have taken an interest in his inventions and tech to the point that they're sometimes referred to as a specific 'sub-division' of the Hamato clan (which can 'command lightning' and other such claims that most of them scoff at).

Raph's also got parts of the family that will happily glom onto him and follow him around and gleefully switch into 'coordinated ninja mode' when he gives the signal. People outside of the family tend to see Raph as one of the most terrifying of the family, but everyone in the family see him as a big old teddybear.

- Raph tends to lean on the 'scary' facade to keep people at a distance, because by that point he knows that if he doesn't then he's going to end up with a fan club. Again. And people are going to be throwing themselves at him. AGAIN. And he learned his lesson the last time (mostly).

- Though not being able to go anywhere in Japan in Usagi's world when he was about 50 without having people trying to throw themselves at him in increasingly desperate attempts to court him or while pledging their undying love to him was enough of a nightmare that he's amazed that sometimes he still forgets about trying to maintain a distance. Even worse, he still has a few diehard hangers-on that have yet to give up even though they've been trying to chase him for decades. (Usagi thinks this is absolutely hilarious and routinely ends up in cackling fits with Leo over it.)

- Mikey sometimes helps Raph dodge his fans and plays innocent if they spot him.

- (Raph was not counting on being seen as so attractive the first time he went to Usagi's world. For several subsequent visits he still wasn't prepared. When he found out about the first 'fan club' the poor man almost fainted, only to end up hiding for about five hours instead.)

People in that world are reasonably unsurprised by the fact that the turtles are still around (because I can easily imagine turtles in that world on average probably being a little longer-lived), but the surprise comes in with the fact that Usagi's still alive.

- He has made vague comments that maybe living with turtles for so long has affected him.

- He's also made vulgar jokes of varying levels of subtlety that have led Leo to facepalm, blush, clamp a hand over Usagi's mouth, or deliberately interrupt so that he won't have to hear one more comment about how sleeping with Leo has 'magically extended' his life.

- Mikey is terrible and cackles every time. Naturally he encourages Usagi's comments just because Leo is 'Too Old For This Shit™', and therefore it's all the more hilarious to him.

- Usagi’s comments may have drawn them more attention than Leo would prefer.

- (You can thank @babblingweirdnonsense for this sub-point addition.)

Usagi: "The true secret of immortality is to worship the flesh of the Kappa Ninjas. I have bedded the leader, and he in turn worships my flesh and gives me life."

Leo: "Stop telling people that sleeping with me will make them live longer."

Usagi: -winking- "I'm trying to make our bed a bit more fun."

- Leo: "...Look what you did. I bet you're proud of yourself."

Usagi: -smirks- "I am indeed. After all, I know all about the magic of a skilled turtle."

Leo: ". . .I love you, but please stop saying words.”

- Raph and Donnie have mastered 'tuning this shit out for the umpteen-millionth time™'. (The kids still have various levels of shrieking about it though, which is part of what makes it so hilarious to Usagi and Mikey both. They both have a terrible sense of humor.)

Mikey's go-to excuse for why he won't settle down with someone while they're stuck in that world for those 20 years is that he's "married to being a parent" and doesn't have time for a partner. Considering the number of great/grand/kids he has, no one's going to disagree.

- It’s mostly because he doesn’t want to end up in the same situation as Raph.

Then there's the perpetual argument over whether Mikey trying to refer to their family as a clan of 'ninjurai' or 'roninja' is remotely acceptable. He insists that both mashup terms fit perfectly since their family is made up of so many ninja and samurai/ronin. Most of the family disagrees on the principle of 1) those aren't real words, and 2) as old as he is why does he still insist on butchering Japanese as much as possible? (He insists because even as an old man he gets a kick out of being a little shit.)

- Other contenders for mashup terms Mikey’s gotten his family to shoot down are: samuninja, shinorai, ronobi, shininja, and rinjarai.

- Even his great/grand/kids have jokingly threatened to disown him for that.

- The argument has had various iterations going for decades

Everyone who knows anything about the family knows that if they want to interact with anyone who gives a sense of being calm, respectful, polite, and so on to go to Leo. And yet despite this everyone also knows that the five old men are possibly the best fighters in Japan; that all five of them are skilled, resourceful, and responsible. It still doesn't change the fact that at times Leo seems to be the only one who cares even a tiny bit about formality anymore.

- It also doesn't help that Leo probably knows entirely too many secrets from too many high-ranking officials scattered throughout that world's Japan.

- 'Oh yes! The responsible one! The leader! Now we can get some proper negotiations out of the wa- Oh no. It's him.'

- Old man Leo keeping a polite face even while the barest hint of a smile is on his face and amusement is dancing in his eyes-- because he knows.

Donnie's gotten so used to saying outrageous things in a deadpan due to having to occasionally explain his tech as 'magic' that there are times where he'll say something like, "No, it's intended to make an entire wall of a building explode if you sneeze near it," without even giving a hint that he knows he said anything that doesn't make sense.

- Raph may or may not have scared off some obnoxious would-be trouble-makers by telling them that if they didn't straighten up that he'd tell Donnie to just go ahead and summon the demons already.

- Leo's given up trying to tell the two of them to not say things that imply they're sacrificing people in some sort of twisted blood ritual. He's just grateful that their reputation is so wide-spread and they're so well-thought-of (if regarded as very strange) that most people seem to know not to take those comments seriously.

- Usagi may have once claimed that he was sacrificed and brought back from the dead several weeks in a row. Leo just rolled his eyes and pretty much told him to stop telling people that he'd let his brothers ritualistically kill his husband on a regular basis.

When Mikey wants to be lazy or a pest at the kids, he absolutely pulls the 'I'm old, I'm so achy and tired, I can't possibly get to my feet and walk that short distance to get (insert whatever here)' card. No one buys it. They've seen him in a fight, during training, etc. They know he's not 'frail', 'weak', or 'fragile' no matter how much he plays it up.

- Which at least once has resulted in a bout of--

"I can't possibly go on! I'll just stay here. And die. Of thirst. Because my grandchild who I thought loved me won't help dear old Grandpa."

"Grandpa. You were running across rooftops an hour ago. I highly doubt that you 'can't' get up."

"Dying. Of thirst. Leo! Leo, are you there?! Everything... going... dark..."

Leo just shaking his head. "No one in the family believed it when we were kids, no one's believing it now."

"I... can't possibly... move..." Over-exaggerated theater gasp.

"...Grandpa. I don't believe you. That didn't even sound close to a death rattle. And you can see the tea kettle from where you're sitting."

"...Too bad I don't have a good swivel-chair here."

"Mikey, no."

- (This is another sub-point you can thank @babblingweirdnonsense for.)

Mikey: “Child! Please give me that plate of food one foot away from me. My knees hurt.”

Child: “Father, I saw you beating an enemy ninja not two hours ago.”

Mikey: “I am sore from the fight.”

Child: “You were doing a handstand five minutes ago.”

Mikey: “I can no longer walk on my feet! Only my arms work now.”

When they’re finally able to go back to their world (a year after their younger selves return to their time) the media almost has a meltdown. Especially since Cody is able to confirm that they’re them. (Because realistically you can’t tell me that Donnie isn’t a famous scientist in that time. All four of them probably ended up in history books.)

Donnie keeps his deadpan semi-nonsense explanations. (Explaining to family or someone who gets what he’s talking about or doing is one thing. To others? He’ll still say things like “It’s magic” and leave it at that.)

- "No, really, how does it work?"

"The power of jesus."

- It even carries over to Donnie talking to reporters.

Reporter: “Where were the four of you for all these years?”

Donnie: "I could tell you-"

Raph: "-but then he'd have to kill you."

Donnie: "-No I wouldn't. But it'd be difficult to answer."

Reporter: "Could you try to explain?"

Donnie: "...Somewhere over the rainbow and in another dimension."

Raph: "Don, we weren't in frickin' Kansas."

Donnie: "Close enough."

Raph: "No it wasn't. Wasn't even on the same side o' the planet.”

And to top it all off, there’s the random thought of someone trying to suggest that one of the older turtles should probably sit in a chair normally (while they're either sitting on the back or on an arm or upside-down, who knows what), mostly out of concern that they might fall since they’re so old, and just the whole,

"Child, I am far too old and nowhere near straight enough to care about how other people think about how I'm sitting when I'm comfortable."

#TMNT #TMNT 2003 #Donnie #Leo #Raph #Mikey #Usagi #katanashipping #Leosagi #long post #my fiction #I had way too much fun with this

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