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prettywordsyouleft · 4 years

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Forsaken | Part 13

Summary: As one of the Forsaken, Jinyoung had no right to covet anything as his own. When he stumbles across you standing in the middle of the village he had plundered, the memories of old make him risk it all, clutching at the past in hopes for a better future.

Pairing: Park Jinyoung x reader

Genre: warrior au / star crossed lovers / angst / romance

Warnings: death, kidnapping, cursing, a myriad of emotions - this is a really sad love story. In this particular part, there is a small battle scene.

Index: Prologue | 1 | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 | 6 | 7 | 8 | 9 | 10 | 11 | 12 | 13 | 14 | 15

“We cannot skirt the mountainside all afternoon,” Mark stated as Jinyoung reached another of your fabric markings. “The cart won’t make it up here and the horses may not fit in some parts that a walking human would.”

“They’re alive,” Jinyoung breathed out the most hopeful sentence he ever had in the presence of his friends. Blinking aside his growing emotions, he nodded once. “You’re right. We need to not take the path they have.”

“Argo and his men will be after them as well, we have to be quicker than them,” Jaebum urged and Jinyoung turned back along the track, moving swiftly to where they had left Jackson and their mounts.

The man was now astride his horse and gave them all fair warning with his eyes as not to dispute it. “Where do we go now?”

“They took the mountain path so we go north,” Jinyoung announced, kicking his horse into its fastest gait. It wasn’t as easy for the cart to go at this speed, but thankfully the ground didn’t give it too much trouble. On the hillier parts of the road they slowed down, and every second they took to maintain their supplies only made Jinyoung yearn for you further.

He needed to see you with his own eyes before the sun set today.

Looking to the mountain path as often as he could, Jinyoung wondered how many trackers you had left for them. Did you have enough of your pants left to protect your legs from debris within such a dense forest? Was Youngjae struggling to climb and thus slowing you down? Were you still moving or had you given up inside the forest?

It was strange to be filled with so much hope after years of dismissing the emotion entirely. Your return had softened his mind and led him to hold onto the precious ideas that his heart governed.

It was all he had right now to continue his path forward. If he didn’t have you at the end of this, there would be no point to anything.

Jinyoung still believed in your breathing. You wouldn’t give up either. He could somehow feel it, as if the air you had expelled now reached his face, guiding him towards you.

Travelling around the mountain pass took longer than he hoped for and the sky was losing some of the vast blue that had brightened it. Jinyoung cast his eyes to the heavens with a silent plea, asking for more light to guide their way. He hadn’t prayed this hard in all his life as he was right now. He begged the moon to hold back from arriving too soon. He knew you wouldn’t make the night out here alone without shelter.

“Is that…” Jaebum called as they came around a bend, the man leading the way now. Jinyoung leaned forward and clucked his tongue in gesture for the horse’s legs to lengthen stride, trying to see what his friend already did.

There, in the distance, two people were making an exhausted dash across a clearing. Tears streamed from Jinyoung’s eyes and his vision blurred despite his efforts to blink the emotions away. Relief coursed through him and with a final yah to the magnificent creature that had powered its way across the countryside for him, he tried to reach you even a second sooner.

Upon hearing the horses, you and Youngjae gripped at one another, dropping into the grass in hopes to hide. You bravely stole a look to see who came upon you, your head appearing more easily when you realised Jinyoung was here for you.

It was as if the Gods had heard his prayers and gifted you with renewed energy. Running across the field towards him, Jinyoung asked the horse to halt, leaping from its back and ran the rest of the way to you. Colliding against you, he pulled you as close to his heart, his soul, as he could get you.

He couldn’t tell who was crying harder between you both.

The others caught up and Jaebum was tearfully greeting Youngjae, checking him over for any added injuries. You didn’t move, not once, even when the others started talking fondly, simply remaining buried within Jinyoung’s embrace.

He didn’t stop you; in fact, he had no desire to let go of you either.

However, it wasn’t safe to remain here like this for long.

Mark looked at the map and then to the road ahead. “We’re on our way already.”

“To Nowhere?” you whispered and Jinyoung nodded. “We can make it?”

“We need to find a place to camp tonight.”

“They’ll be looking for us,” Jackson warned with a hiss, reaching for his side.

You finally moved from Jinyoung’s side and over to feel Jackson’s forehead.

“He’s feverish!”

“Whether they find us or not, we have no choice but to rest.”

“Have you ever been sick?” you asked with a nasally voice, coughing a little as Jinyoung tended to your fever with a cool cloth. He stopped his action and thought for a moment.

“Once.”

“Who tended to you?”

“Nobody, I just rode it out.”

“That’s awful!” you proclaimed, battling through a series of nasty coughs that had Jinyoung reaching for the glass of water on your bedside table. Once recovered, you smiled weakly. “No one should go without love when sick.”

“You and that love,” he muttered, reaching up to dab at your forehead again.

You watched his actions for a moment before a smile spread across your lips. “You’re showing me your love right now.”

“No, I’m removing your fever. You’re very hot.”

“Am I? I don’t feel it.”

“Of course not, you’re too sick to tell.”

“I feel your love though,” you persisted, stretching your hand out towards his jaw and cupping it gently. “You are the sweetest lover.”

“And your fever is doing the talking right now,” he answered with a steady flush of heat rising upon his skin. Jinyoung started to feel feverish himself, dabbing at his own forehead with the cloth.

You giggled. “Here, allow me to show you, my love.”

All night long, Jinyoung allowed you to rest in his lap. He watched as you slumbered peacefully, brushing his fingers over your forehead to remove any wrinkles when you thought too hard within your dream state. They had found a secluded area to hide that was far enough from the road to easily discover, and thanks to Mark’s excellent shot, they even were able to have dinner. You had managed to change out into spare clothes from the cart earlier.

Youngjae was resting against Jaebum as he tended to Jackson’s feverish state and Jinyoung couldn’t help but smile at the memory that had freshly popped into his mind.

Jaebum smirked. “Why, I don’t think I’ve ever seen you this happy.”

“Shut it before I start spouting nonsense about you showing your love for Jackson right now,” he shot back and Jaebum frowned before chuckling.

“Well… I do care about him. I guess that’s enough to mean love. I think. I still don’t really understand the concept.”

Glancing down at you, Jinyoung smiled. “I do.”

“Don’t rub it in my face, Commander.”

“You called me a fool for being in love.”

Jaebum shrugged. “Maybe I want to be a fool one day.”

“Me too,” Youngjae said with a dreamy sigh, rolling into Jaebum and nestling in further. The older man closed his eyes to settle his amusement before continuing to dab at Jackson’s forehead. “We’re a family, right?”

“Where did you suddenly get that notion? We’re a team,” Jinyoung refuted though he became thoughtful. You had talked of family recently as well.

“Y/N mentioned that a family sacrifices itself for one another. We’ve been doing that for a whole lot of years, brother.”

“Oh, so I’m your brother now,” Jinyoung asked teasingly and Jaebum shrugged. Thinking it over, Jinyoung nodded. “I wouldn’t give my all for any other bastards in our team.”

“You let BamBam live.”

“He lost a part of his life with that painful knowledge.”

“The old Jinyoung would have sliced him down all the same. You’re fond of him much like I’m fond of Youngjae.”

“I’d much prefer BamBam on the battlefront than Youngjae.”

“I don’t know, he might surprise us,” Jaebum mentioned with a grin and Jinyoung laughed softly.

As the stars littered the night, Jinyoung contemplated that of family and bonding. He hadn’t thought he had a whole lot in this world. Yet as dawn approached them and he looked around at those who sacrificed their all to come on this journey, he felt as if he had been blessed with too much for someone so wicked.

The feeling continued as he rode with you sitting in front of him, pressing his lips into the back of your head whenever he felt as if he didn’t express his gratitude enough for what he held.

The sun had been bright for most of the morning and then it became hidden behind a dark cloud. The ominous change loomed over their heads, sharpening their senses. Jinyoung looked to Mark who nodded. “I hear something too.”

“What?” you asked, growing nervous. “Maybe it’s nothing bad.”

The first drops of rain fell on top of them as Mark prepared an arrow. When he caught sight of the first warrior, he let it fly, knocking him off his horse instantly. The roar of commands filled the air and the sounds of hurried movement were deafening. Jinyoung curled his arm tightly around your waist as he rode on ahead, Mark and Jaebum flanking him on either side. Youngjae, having scrambled from the cart he was tending to Jackson upon to the back of the horse, now tried to keep up with Jinyoung, dodging the firing arrows on the way.

Even as he took men down from on top of his horse, Jinyoung knew they were outnumbered. He tried his best to navigate a way to keep you safe, pulling out his sword and swinging it at those who came too close. You gripped on only to kick out when someone grabbed for his leg.

“Get back you monster!” you cried, reaching for your dagger and thrashing it about. Jinyoung couldn’t relax his grip, even with your attempts of protection, and realised the army was quickly surrounding them all. He pulled his horse to an unsteady halt, the animal leaping around on its front legs in mutual frustration.

Just as Argo rode towards him with a triumphant smile upon his face, Jinyoung turned to a new sound fast approaching.

An almighty growl came from the direction they had just ridden from, men being slain in quick concession. Mark and Jaebum used the distraction to make a gap in the men who entrapped them from the path ahead.

“It’s BamBam and Youngjae!” you cried as you craned your head around Jinyoung’s torso. “It’s the rest of the men!”

Jinyoung blindly took out several more enemies coming his way, keeping his eye on Argo.

The warrior merely smiled at him before charging forward.

However, before he could even make it close enough a horse flew right into his side, BamBam leaping from the saddle and onto the burly opponent.

Jinyoung edged forward, only to see the pathway created opening up further.

“Go!” the young man yelled as he stabbed at Argo, Yugyeom jumping into the fight and barricading the attacker also. “Go before it’s too late!”

“You must live!” Jaebum screamed before kicking onwards, following Youngjae already hurtling down the path.

Jinyoung watched as his men, the ones he had so easily left behind to save you, now protected them all with their lives. With a final glance at the fight, he pushed his horse down the path to escape, Mark taking up the rear.

May BamBam seek all the revenge we deserve, Jinyoung thought desperately as they galloped solemnly towards their destination.

_________________

Part 14

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jiminssizzles · 4 years

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if the world was ending.

Summary: The soulmate system works on your side of the world, only it activates after you turn 20 years old.

Pairing: Min Yoongi x Reader

Genre: Fluff, slight angst (mixed emotions, really)

Rating: PG

Warning: None

Word count: 3K+

Author’s Note: This is my first ever commission written for @mindays as part of the ChangesWithLuv project from @ficswithluv! Please don’t hesitate to donate or be a creator. You can find all details at the ChangesWithLuv official post -- click here! For the nth time, thank you to my beta-reader, @minyoongail for trying to give me deadlines. :)

With messed up hair and dusty clothes, you entered your father's car that he lets you use whenever you go to the university. Your class was supposed to be in the field half an hour ago when a hurricane suddenly struck near the school while your professor was contemplating on what sport you shall do today.

It has been the fifth hurricane in 2 days. There were thunderstorms too even if it's summer. There were different news about forest wildfires, even tsunamis. It's as if the world is really ending, and you're just waiting for the earthquake to happen.

You turned the radio on and decided to send a message to your parents before driving.

"If ever you see the hurricane news hitting somewhere near our uni, I'm okay. I'm on my way home."

After turning the engine on, you found yourself staring at Taehyung and Celine holding each others' hands while walking to Taehyung's car. Both of them turned 20 last year, thus, confirming that they are really soulmates.

The soulmate system works on your world too. Plot twist? You only get your soulmate scheme when you turn 20. If the world was really ending then you'd be pissed as fuck. You are 19 years old and you are bound to turn 20 tomorrow. You wanted to meet your soulmate at least, right?

As you drove off, you heard your phone ring and saw Yoongi's caller ID. You answered it and he did not even give you a chance to speak, "Love, are you on your way home? I saw that a hurricane hit near you." You smiled, remembering how he's always protective and worried for you, "I'm on my way home, love."

Yoongi turned 20 a year before you. As much as you want to know what he got as his soulmate scheme, he doesn't want to disclose anything before you come of age.

You thought about how Celine turned 20 before Taehyung. When she turned 20, she suddenly got a tattoo on her wrist. Taehyung just smiled at her, telling her that he's willing to wait to know if they are really for each other. At the end of the year, Taehyung turned 20, the same tattoo as Celine’s slowly inked on his wrist, making the two of them happy that their heart knew each other even before the universe confirmed it.

Please let Yoongi and I have that too, you whisper it like a prayer every night. You stopped spacing out when you heard the phone call end. Checking your phone with one hand while driving with the other, you saw that there's no signal. The radio is still working though, so you turned the volume up.

“Newsflash! Good evening, citizens! As much as we don’t want to bring bad news to you, it was recently confirmed to us that the world is bound to end on the day after tomorrow. It hasn’t been confirmed yet how it will start, although we can already see that it started already, given the natural calamities we’ve been experiencing for days now. We are now just waiting for--..”

The radio’s signal suddenly went out. You continued driving, not wanting to experience chaos while outside the house. You were almost home when you felt the ground shake, causing you to step on the brakes and stop driving for a while. A loud knock was heard from the window beside you, “Yoongi! What are you doing here?” You asked after opening the car door.

You took his appearance in. He’s wearing a plain black t-shirt and a baseball cap, beads of sweat are running from his forehead to his chin. “I ran as soon as our phone call was cut. I was so worried that you’d be going home alone. Get in, I’ll drive us home.” He said, trying his best to hide the panic in his voice. Relief washed over him when he saw that you were safe.

Upon entering the car, you asked him how he found you. He just smiled and told you that he was running on the way to your house when he saw your car. He parked your car in your garage. The ground was still shaking when you got out of the car. Upon entering your house, you realized that your parents aren’t home yet. Yoongi immediately hugged you and whispered in your ear, “If the world’s really ending, then let me just spend the rest of my time with you.”

You chuckled when you shouldn’t, “I’d love that, Yoongi.” He spun you around and caressed your cheek, his hands moving downwards to check your arms, “Are you hurt anywhere? You were in the field right? Did anything hit you?” You smiled, “No, I’m perfectly fine. Stop being paranoid.”

He kissed your forehead, “You’re not getting out of my sight for the next hours until tomorrow ends.” Yoongi pulled you to the kitchen and rummaged through your refrigerator. “We will spend the next hours as normal as possible.” You looked at him and nodded while he added, “And I’m going to love you as extraordinary as possible.”

He quickly went to cook your favorite dish. Staring at him, you can’t help but remember the first day you met him. You were so stressed due to school back then, so you opted to cool down for a while on this new restobar downtown. “Annyeonghaseyo,” a guy as white as sugar greeted you when you entered the restobar. It’s afternoon and the sun is scorching hot. The guy approached you and asked if you wanted an iced drink since the weather is too hot.

You just nodded in response, not wanting to talk more since you’re in a bad mood. “Noted on your order, ma’am. You can call me, Yoongi, if you need anything else.” He showed you his gummy smile before dashing away. You watch as he prepare your drink, the bad cloud above your head slowly melting away.

When he came back, he placed the drink in front of you along with tissues to use. You just smiled at him and he slightly bowed. Your eyes went from him to the drink and tissues in front of you. You can’t help but smile when you saw something written on the tissue.

‘Hi, I’m Yoongi and I’d like to know you more. Would you mind writing your number on this tissue so I can get it later? :)’

The two of you risked it from that day onwards, even if you are perfectly knowledgeable that he may or may not be your soulmate.

“You’re thinking about it again, aren’t you?” Your mind drifted back to the present situation and Yoongi. “Which one?” You ask. Yoongi snickered, “You’re thinking about the soulmate thing again.” He said, before settling a plate of your favorite dish in front of you. “What did you get on your 20th birthday? How do you know your soulmate?” You pushed, expecting for him to finally cave in.

“Why won’t you tell me? Is it because it’s impossible that it will be me?” You ask again. Yoongi ruffled your hair and kissed your forehead for a good 5 seconds, just letting his lips stay on it. “This soulmate scheme can exist or not, and I’ll still know that you are the one for me.” He said, making you cave instead and start eating your food.

Yoongi just laughed and closed his one eye for a while,“You’re winking at me again.” You voiced out, making him laugh again. “I am not!” Yoongi just smiled to himself. “Few more hours til you turn 20 and I’ll tell you, okay?” He said before standing up again to get you a drink. “Are you my server? Come eat with me, babe.” You said. Yoongi is not the clingy type of boyfriend, but there are days wherein he can’t get his hands off you. You found yourself being pulled to his lap along with your plate of food. “And if my parents come in?” You ask, Yoongi smirking right after.

“It’s our last day on Earth. Come on.”

The two of you spent the whole afternoon cuddling and eating junk foods, Yoongi finally letting go of his strict, clean intermittent fasting. Evening came and your parents walked in on you planting soft kisses on Yoongi’s cheeks, but they couldn’t care less. They just waved at the two of you and went upstairs. You aren’t sure if you saw it right, but you notice the slight opposition on your father’s face, but your mother was quick to pull him away.

Yoongi just laughed and pressed his cheek on your lips. “Few more hours and you’re 20! I can’t wa--” His lips suddenly turned into a straight line when you both felt an earthquake. He immediately looked at you and your puppy eyes, “I’m scared.” You admitted.

Yoongi hugged you tight and rubbed the small of your back, “I got you. Don’t be.”

The endless cuddles are reserved for special occasions or for your alone time, but you think that nothing’s going to stop Yoongi tonight. You’ve lost count of the times he kissed your forehead, cheeks and hands. You’ve also lost count on how many times he pulled you into a tight hug and how he randomly says how beautiful you are in his eyes. Lastly, you’ve lost count on how many times he winked at you, which is something you don’t get why he does so much.

On normal days, the two of you are already happy with just being together while doing your own hobbies. Yoongi loves painting a lot, while you love singing. He often asks you to sing for him while he paints and you always gladly oblige.

The two of you are staying in your room while you’re busy trying to paint. Yoongi is doing his best to teach you the basics. “It’s sad that I have to learn this and I may not be able to do it tomorrow anymore.” You whispered after completing another stroke. “What makes you say that?”

“Mom said that an asteroid will hit us in a few hours, and if that asteroid kills us--” Yoongi kissed you full on the lips and when you tried to continue what you were saying, he deepened the kiss. “You were saying?” He smugly asked. “I was just saying that if that astero--” He kissed you again, making the both of you smile while kissing. Pulling away, Yoongi winked again. You decided to tease him more, “Astero--” You said, before he shut you up with another kiss.

“Stop it, you’re doing this on purpose!” He finally called you out. “I am doing this on purpose.” You said. “Well, mademoiselle, I love your purpose.. and you, of course.” He said with a smile. He stood up and pulled you to stand with him.

He grabbed your phone from your nightstand and quickly changed the song blasting from your speakers. He returned it to your nightstand and placed both of your hands on his shoulders. You heard the strum of guitar from the speakers and you can’t help but smile when you heard Daniel Caesar’s Best Part playing.

Yoongi wrapped his arms around your waist and pulled you closer, “You don’t know babe, when you hold me, and kiss me slowly, it’s the sweetest thing..” He softly sang while your head rests on his chest and you hold your hands together in his nape. He initiated the slow dancing to the song while he whispers sweet nothings on your ear.

You felt content, happy and most especially, alive. Nothing will beat the way your heart pounds from your chest whenever Yoongi makes you feel loved than how he usually does. “Where you go I follow,” he sang again and held your two hands for you to part, “No matter how far, if life is a movie,” he spun you around so your back is against his chest while his arms are wrapped around you, “then you’re the best part..” He whispered before planting soft kisses on your cheeks.

You stared at your picture with Yoongi framed on your nightstand. You thought that if you’re not going to live through tomorrow, at least you have today. As if on cue, your parents opened your room door while carrying a cake.

“Happy birthday, sweetie!” Your mother beamed before kissing your cheek. Your father, on the other hand, eyed Yoongi before pulling you to a bear hug. “Happy 20th birthday, princess! Thought we should bring the cake now, it’s already midnight.”

You voiced out your gratefulness for them for everything you have in this life. “Oh come on, don’t do that now, but I love you too, baby.” Your father said as he kissed your forehead. The four of you went downstairs to eat the cake, your father slowly warming up to Yoongi and finally acknowledging that he’s here and he’s not going anywhere.

As you take your sweet time with your parents, you are unaware that Yoongi can’t take his eyes off you. You ate almost half the cake with your parents and Yoongi when they decided to stand up from the dining table. “You’re 20 now Y/N, I think the two of you should talk.” Your mother gave you a soft smile before caressing your cheek. She pulled your father away to give privacy to you and Yoongi.

You checked your body for any signs of the soulmate scheme, for any tattoo, or mark, anything, you just need anything. Yoongi looks so relaxed and is still staring at you. “Well? I’m 20 now, won’t you tell me what’s your soulmate scheme?” You asked, pouting at the end. He just smiled, “You’re impatient.” You were about to protest when he waved his hands, “Okay! Okay, I’ll tell you.”

You are staring at him intently when he suddenly winked, “What the heck was that?!” You asked, not knowing if you should laugh or be annoyed. “That’s it? You learned to wink?!” You ask again, frustrated. Yoongi laughed, “How do you think I know where you are all the time?”

“You developed a...tracker… using your eyes?” You asked again. Yoongi shook his head, “I can see what you see, love. That was how I found you earlier on the road, and how I always come unexpected especially when I see that there’s a problem.” He said, your eyes squinting. You don’t get it.

“How do you do that?” He shuffled from his seat and faced you properly. “Whenever I close my right eye, I can see what you see.. and love, you don’t know how much you make me happy, because whenever I do that, your line of vision is always on me.”

“I thought that my second greatest view would be a scenery or watching my favorite movie a hundred of times, but I was wrong. My second greatest view is your own view of the world.” He added, making you blush. “Shut it, you know that I only have eyes for you. So that’s your second greatest view, what’s your first?”

“You, of course.” He said as if the words slipping from his tongue is something natural for the two of you everyday. “I love you,” You said, pulling him to a hug. “What if I close one of my eyes and it’s not your vision that I see?” Yoongi just smirked at your question. “Damn the universe, then. They can’t do anything about it anyway. It’s our last day.” He answered, earning a giggle from the both of you. “Shall we try now?” He asked and you nodded.

You were about to close your eyes when you felt a strong earthquake, making the frames hanging on your walls fall down. It didn’t take a minute for you to see your parents running down the stairs, both your father and mother pulling you and Yoongi under the dining table. “What are you two doing standing? Safety first!” Your father directed to the both of you.

When the earthquake stopped, you took a look at the mess of your house. There were shattered glass, cracked walls and display items sprawled on the floor. Aftershocks are expected so you all went out of the house and walked on the streets. Your parents wanted to go on an open field near your university, saying that in this way, no debris can fall on you. You’re worried sick, but Yoongi doesn’t let go of your hand. You shoot him side glances from time to time and he makes this reassuring smile to comfort you everytime.

He checked where you are looking and saw that you’re staring at your hands held together, so he held you tighter. “I love you, stop worrying.” He said. You saw your mother walking towards you and held your other hand, “One of my friends said that after the asteroid hits the Earth, this will all be over.”

“So, it’s not sure if the world will be destroyed?” Yoongi bravely asked. Your mother just nodded, “Don’t lose hope, kids.” She said, before going back to your father's side.

When you reached the open field, you stared at the sky wherein there’s already a line forming as you stare at the asteroid rushing to hit the ground. You are not sure if it will hit you or some other place in this world, but you’re sure as hell that you want to leave this Earth with Yoongi by your side.

“Do you want to try it now?” Yoongi asked. You’re still staring at the sky, tears starting to flow. You tried closing your right eye and you saw nothing. Turning your head to face him, panic is evident on your face. “Yoongi, it’s black.. I can’t see anything.” You said.

“One more, baby, one more.” Yoongi said, encouraging you to try again. You chose to close your left eye now, and you still see it.

Nothing.

Darkness.

You don’t know why your heart is aching when you know that it will not matter if you’re soulmates or not, Yoongi loves you and you love him just as much -- not a soulmate scheme will remove that. You were brought back to reality when you saw people running towards your way, some of them screaming “Sand storm! Sand storm!”

Yoongi grabbed your hand again to pull you away, “The asteroid struck the Earth already! Let’s go!” You ran with him, although you don’t know where the two of you are heading. You stared at him intently as his lips parted from running for miles, as his head turned to look where you should run to, as his hands never stop to guide you and as he tightens your grip so he’ll never lose you.

In the midst of chaos, you realized that it’s okay. You are happy with Yoongi and you love him with all of your heart, mind, body and soul.

Just as when you’re finally letting go, Yoongi tripped on one of the debris, making the two of you stumble on the street. You felt tears flowing from your eyes as the dust made it hurt. “Love, love, don’t cry, come on, get up.” He says, while you feel both of his hands pulling you to stand up. He rubbed a cloth on both of your eyes. “Look at me, look at me, baby. Come on.” He urges you, pulling you to the side so other people won’t bump into you.

Yoongi kept on blowing your eyes while rubbing it with cloth to help you open them again. The sand storm is slowly stopping and the people are slowing down. When you open your eyes, people are almost quiet and Yoongi’s grip is still firm on your arm. You opened your right eye first and instead of seeing Yoongi in front of you, you saw yourself, your right eye bloodshot from the dust.

“Yoongi,” you said, your heart jumping in joy at the most difficult time of your life. “Yes? Does your other eye still hurt? I’ll find water to clean it up.” He calmly said, his breathing still ragged from the running. “No, no.. I’m okay.” You said, not wanting to let go of him. “Don’t go. I have something to tell you.” Yoongi looked at you quizzically, his eyebrows furrowing.

Sighing, you smiled and cupped his face, “I see it too, baby, I see what you see. You are my soulmate.”

- end -

published 06.24.20

#ficswithluv #btswriterscollective #btswritingcafe #bangtanidx #bangtanscenery #min yoongi #bts yoongi fic #yoongi fluff #bts yoongi fluff #yoongi fic #changeswithluv

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seb-owns-these-tatas · 4 years

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What’s wrong? (Tj Hammond) (Pt.2)

PART 1

Characters: Bi!TJ Hammond x Asian!Female!Reader

Summary: You're an overseas worker and is in a relationship with TJ, but people can't seem to accept the differences between you both even by financially and background wise. (PART 2!) (Read part 1 before this? Heehee!)

Warning: VERY Detailed making out but no tickling the pickle. Heehee! Cuss words. ANGST, SAD AND A VERY FURIOUS TJ HAMMOND.

Words: 4700+ (IT'S LONG AF AGAIN. 😂)

A/N: I love Tj Hammond so much? You can certainly see how I love him by reading this? Lmao. GO BE CRAZY WITH YOUR FEEDBACKS, TATER TOTS! Typos and grammatical errors may be a lot because English has only been my second language. 😅 LOTS OF GIFS IN THIS ONE! (Btw, Political Animal's plot has kinda been blurry to me right now because I've watched it last year. So, there maybe some changes if you'll notice if I have some errors about the story. Heehee. 😅 Or maybe not? I have no idea.)

Disclaimer: GIF'S and pictures used are not mine. Only the edits are and the oneshot of course. 😉 Credits to the owners of the GIFS.

Dedicated: @fandomgalcentral

The whole boring but essentially interesting party was finally done. After all that argument you had with a journalist, and Tj being the knight and shining armor to scoot the woman off have ruined your bladder. With a lot of Martinis you took made you a little tipsy, making you all giggly and wanting to pee all the while.

In all honesty, you were kind of smashed. But, not smashed enough to fall on the floor with a pile of barf. No. You should keep your head straight before embarrassing yourself from the Hammond family.

"Teejaaaay," You clung your arm around his waist, hugging your boy friend as he was playing you a song on the piano in which you requested for him to do. He was too engrossed on playing, the relaxing melody making you smile. Your eyes turning into slits when you did and that adorable smile didn't go unnoticed by Tj as he was quick to take a peek as his fingers continued to play. "Teejaaaay,"

The guests weren't around anymore, they all went home and it was only you and him. Probably Nana in the dining room, drowning in more glasses of Margaritas since you could hear glasses clinging from there. You intently watched his fingers move in such a professional manner. He got it in him. Tj got the talent even though he hadn't got to play for months now. It was still in his blood.

"You're one sexy mofo," You suddenly uttered lowly, completely out of your wits, followed by a giggle that made him do a double take. Your eyes squinting on his face, closely staring at your gorgeous boy.

He ceased his fingers from playing. A snort wanting to erupt from your sudden confession. "Aren't you..." He paused, his shoulders shaking from trying not to laugh at you because he knew how emotional you can get when you're drunk. "Is my little noodle buzzed right now?" Tj peered down into your eyes, ever so lovingly. Never forgetting to give you that wild feeling inside your stomach, making the butterflies fly.

"No," Your nose was scrunched from his question. You? Drunk? Never. Was he hallucinating? When does Y/N get drunk? "You're hilarious, Honey." His eyebrow rose from your sudden sweet endearment acompanied with a dash of sweet talking.

Definitely buzzed. He thought inside his mind, clearly noticing the sudden urge of being confident with yourself since you weren't like that all the time. He knew you were conservative, quiet and only sweet to him not to others.

Tj held the end of the piano cover, gently dropping the cover before glancing at you who seemed to be completely confused. "What??" You voiced out your confusion. "That's it? But, I wanted moreee!" Your voice faded, turning softer and more quiet. "Because you seemed to be so happy playing the piano again," you whispered to yourself. "I loooove your smiles,"

To your surprise, Tj caught on to what you said because it wasn't quite quiet as you thought it would. "I've been happy because you've never left me when I needed someone to be with me the most," he stared into your eyes, a lot more tender than he used to. A small smile pulling the ends of his lips that made you coo like you were a crazy mother supporting her son.

"Aww," You actually muttered out loud, pouting up at him and he couldn't help but touch the end of your nose with his fingertip, making himself chuckle from how you scrunched up your nose once again. "Look at chu', Teejaaay. Confessing the love you have for a worthless overseas worker who happened to work in a bakery shop in the morning, and a waitress in a bar when she gets her nightshift--"

Tj held your lips with his finger, shutting you up before you could start your emotional rant that could make his feelings take a turn, the constant heavy feeling for how you were thinking about yourself. He didn't want to hear your extreme critizations about who you are. It pains to hear you say all those words when in fact, you never saw how perfect you are in his eyes.

"I know you're drunk, but don't start and upset me, Y/N." He whispered very lowly, a frown was now visible on his features which made you reciprocate his expression.

You sighed, keeping your eye contact despite of your 'slight' intoxication. Just staring right through him, appreciating the once broken boy in front of you, still in recovery. That soft look in your eyes made him glance at your crusty ass lips that made him break his frown.

Keep in mind to give Y/N those lip balms he uses whenever he goes out. He smiled, slowly caressing your shoulder, down to your arm which made you pout up at him. Resisting the way he looks at you were one of your weaknesses because you never did anyway.

"I swear, if you don't make out with me in front of this piano, I'm--"

His eyes glimmered then turned into small crescents as he chuckled, sounding so heartfelt. "Here I thought you were one conservative lady," He raised a brow, looking and sounding so sassy. Just like your sassy Tj that you love so much.

"Surprise! I'm actually not one right now," You chatted him up nonchalantly, clicking your head to the side with a naughty smirk. "If only you could draw me like one of your french girls while I lay naked on this piano but I'm no French and you're certainly no painter--"

Tj cackled out loud, alarming your intoxicated self as you jumped on the piano seat. "Only my Y/N could drop the weirdest hints to make me french kiss her on this piano,"

Your heart was frantically jumping out of your chest. Was it probably the effect of alcohol? Or maybe it was honestly Tj's damn effect on your whipped self? "I actually said IN FRONT of this piano, but I have no complaints about making out with me on top of this oh-so-sleek piano--" You emphasized, gesturing on the piano in front of you. Tj couldn't help but shake his head from how funny and adoring you were acting tonight.

"Jesus Christ," He mumbled as you heard him chuckle. A small insect that flew on your nose distracted your current state of mind. Blasè from how you naturally slapped your own nose with your own hand, making you groan because it hurt.

Don't think it didn't go unnoticed by your boyfriend because it did, and he laughed even more.

"You're such a talkative noodle when you're drunk," To your surprise, you didn't see him stand up from his seat. "Tj--" And he basically captured you in his arms, instantly placing you on top of their piano that made all the heat travel towards your face. What if his mother sees the both of you in that 'thirsty' position? What will she think of you? Not that your mind could muster those things up right now because all its focus is on Tj and his sexy ass self. Nobody else.

"Eeeek! Tj!" You shrieked, shyly covering your lips with your hands, a smile never fading.

"Shut up," He uttered non-chalantly his next words stated as if it was a matter of fact. "That crusty ass lips needs a little dusting anyway,"

Your boyfriend and his sass. Thus, it was your time to raise a brow. "I am offended," He grinned, leaning in close, his cerulean blue eyes turning darker with the mischievous thought that he had in mind. "Preferably with my tongue," Tj added so smoothly before catching your lips with his.

You were currently in a whirlwind, with how Tj was kissing you? He was definitely a pro at it. Creating a world inside your mind that nobody could ever jump in. Just you and Tj. Your own little world.

Tj bit your lip, igniting a purr inside of you that made him grip your hips tight, turning on an imaginary switch that could make him go on and on, dangerously never wanting to stop. He chuckled a very low one once he got to lick your lips, teasing you which made you shuffle your legs and change your current sitting position. Boldly untangling your legs and propelling to have Tj between your thighs, making him oblige with no complaints because he was already used to it. Used to how you like him between your thighs every so often.

The way you tightly tug on his coat could define you as a cat wanting his or her owner for food. Definitely deprived and hungry for what Tj could give.

For you? He'll give you everything you wanted. Even the sun or the moon if he was being unrealistic.

"T-J?" You whispered, talking through his kisses and getting distracted by the sounds it creates from the way he was practically eating your face with closed eyes. Your hands instinctively took his face, keeping himself angled from where you could kiss him affectionately as you can, adding a little bit of tongue as you do even though you weren't quite used to it. Tj didn't mind though because he was quick to lap up your tongue back just like how you did.

Your spine shivered when you felt his fingers cascade on the side of your neck, clasping his fingers on your nape and keeping you there where he wanted. "You're," Peck. "the only," Smooch. "person," Bite. "who," A quiet giggle from the both of you "keeps me," Lick. "sane," Another deep kiss that drugged your kind soul.

A special drug that Tj could only effect you with it.

"The piano," Dougie sounded so done with everything, probably exactly exhausted from their engagement party and seeing his brother making out with his girlfriend certainly added more fatigue to the previous one. "Really, Tj?"

"God, I don't play the piano because you do those stuffs but Nana uses that for fucks sake,"

If it wasn't for Tj who happened to stopped the kisses, you guys wouldn't probably stop because you were too intoxicated and worked up to even know his brother was there. "A cockblocker," Tj backed his head a little, giving you space to breath. You felt him swipe the sides of your lips with his thumbs, erasing the smudge of your nude lipstick, paying no mind that his brother saw him making out with you. "As per usual," Your lover sounded unamused before finally giving his brother the attention he deserved.

"You guys..." Dougie gestured to the both of you before cringing, "were planning to...?" Tj nodded his head, his powdery blue eyes glimmering against the lights with euphoria. Definitely it was because of you.

"Yeah," He cocked his head to the side, playfully squinting his eyes at his brother and still sounding unamused. "Apparently, you're a cockblocker," His lips turn to a grin in which his brother has reciprocated as well. "Continuously giving me blue balls, Doug. You're the best," Tj added with a strong sense of sarcasm.

"Nana's gonna whoop your ass," Dougie chuckled, tugging on the lapels of his coat to flatten it up. "Anyway, mom needs to talk to you,"

You continued to stare at the beautiful man standing in between you with a dreamy glint in your eyes, never cutting off your attention to look at his brother. Heat travelled to your cheeks with your gal bladder twisting in a knot though that didn't stop you from staring at your boyfriend like a high school kid.

"I need to talk to her anyways," Tj informed his brother with a tiny raise of his brow, his attention solely on his brother who walked a foot closer to where you were. "Is it about the dome? did something happen?"

"Nah," Tj shook his head and he could feel you tugging on his shoulder. Slightly shaking to get his attention. "Just something important that I need to talk to her about,"

Dougie nodded, not wanting to dig deeper because apparently Thomas didn't want to tell him the details. He briefly looked at you, and he couldn't help but smile. Entirely amused by how you were asking Tj for help to take you to the bathrooms because you wanted to pee so bad.

"Y/N's drunk." Dougie responded as he watched Tj help you jump down the piano. "Well, that's a first,"

"You didn't need to state to obvious, Doug." Tj muttered with a chuckle. Feeling your arms surround him in a tight hug while humming at the same time. "I wanna pee, I wanna pee," You repeated, sniffing your boyfriend's sweet, masculine, vanilla perfume that you love so much.

"Oh, God. I didn't know she's like this when she's drunk." He tried stopping his giggle when you tried your best to tiptoe and sniff his delectable neck. Humming from how scenty his perfume was. He emitted a snort, jumping as he giggled like a kid as he took his palm to cover your lips. "You're tickling me, sweetheart!"

"Let me peeeeee, Hammondddddd..Or I'm biting you!" You slurred and sounded inaudible. Licking his palm at the same time in which he didn't find it gross and kept covering your lips. "Rawr!"

"God," Dougie facepalmed, keeping himself pretty composed but he couldn't help but still chuckle from your intoxicated state.

"Jesus Christ! Okay! Okay! We're going to take you to the bathrooms and you're gonna have your wondrous pee time," Tj talked you through, his amused eyes staring down at you with a tender smile and glimmer. "Got that, baby?"

You were quick to give him a shaky salute, a giggle never forgetting to travel way past your lips with a wiggle of your brows that made his brother glance at the both of you before spinning on his heels to walk away.

"Sir, yes--!" You hiccupped, giggling in the process with your eyes turning crescents. "--Baby--Sir?"

✧˖*✧˖*✧˖*✧˖*✧˖*

"Thanks, mom. I really needed that discouragement,"

"Tj, you're being a little too head over heels with this Asian woman--"

"And now you're giving out negative complaints again even when I had a relationship with a man," Tj had his hands on his hips, seeming to appear stupified from all he was hearing from Elaine Hammond. The secretary of the state. A.K.A his mother.

His eyes were bloodshot red, emotions currently in a mess and thoughts were in a haywire. "Do you even consider my happiness, mom?" He answered back, standing a foot away from his mother.

"Tj, honey," Elaine sounded defeated, a loud sigh escaping her lips. "You know I do,"

"Then why do you oppose me of marrying her?!" Her son's animosity kept her mouth shut. What was the problem with his decision? Why was she saying no to his decision even though he was already an adult? Old enough to think through his decisions in life?

Tj couldn't help but chuckle in anger before hastily shifting to rage that made him spit accidental profanities towards his mother. "She's not a fucking congressman who decided to give up on me and those kind of shit!"

"You watch that language young man!" Elaine's eyes wanted to pop out of her eyesockets. They were not having this talk again.."It's just--" His mother stuttered, finding the right words so she wouldn't hurt her precious son. "What I actually wanted to point out is that it's too soon, son." She paused, taking another sigh when she saw him shake his head in disdain.

There had been a second of silence, waiting for her son to talk but Tj kept his mouth shut as he waits for her to finish her sweet scolding. "You're dating her for like," She thought for a second, counting the months that Y/N and Tj were together inside her head. "--a year? this was the first time we've got to talk again in person and this is what you surprise me with?" Elaine had a hint of distress in her voice. "A quick sudden marriage that you wanted to tie her up?"

Tj cut their eye contact. The floor currently more appealing to stare at rather than his unsupportive mother who found this very important decision in his life, very wrong for her. An utter mistake.

"Teejay, honey," She sweet talked, trying to make him feel better. "I...I just don't want the past to repeat itself, you know how it was when you dated Sean,"

Tj had his tongue poking on the insides of his cheeks. One of his defense mechanisms or ways to show that he was on the verge of crying. He puffed out air out of his mouth, entirely distressed from his mother's opposition.

He cleared his throat, emphasizing his words with some simple movements of his hands. Eyes completely irked by how things wouldn't go as planned. "But, she's different mom. She isn't like him. I've been clean for the past year!"

"That's what you said when you dated him back then," She deadpanned, reciprocating his gestures as she placed her hands on her hips.

"Mom," Tj sounded desperate. His eyes completely glossy under the incandescent lights. "I'm downright in love with her," He added, biting his lips as hard as how his mother's way of thinking was unwavered.

Tj choked on his own words, cinching his eyebrows as he added. "--And I've never been this lovestruck with a woman for all my life," her son paused, taking a breather. "I love her too much that it'll hurt if she lets me go,"

Elaine shook her head in disappointment. "And your solution for that fear you feel is to marry the heck out of Y/N?" She spat. "Tj, do you even have a single trust for her?"

Tj couldn't help but groan internally, roughly pulling on the ends of his roots as he stared at his mother, entirely stupefied from how she was taking everything in. "I do, Mom! I do! I'm just scared that it'll happen again," Thomas honestly spoke, voice turning softer from opening a wound that was already healing. Even close to being healed. "Especially with her,"

Elaine was staring at her son with pity. Tj completely looked like a puppy who was in need of an owner, a pup who was deprived from love and care. His mother couldn't help the tears from starting to form because how can she let her once happy son end up that way? How could she?

Was she really a bad mother?

"She's special," Tj added desperately, eyes bloodshot red. "She saved my life," He choked, sniffing to himself as he washed his face with a hand. Pulling the strings of his fragile heart in misery. "Saved me from all the suicide attempts that I wanted to happen," pause. "Saved me from caging inside my fears, insecurities and darkness that was bound to trap me till I couldn't find my way out,"

Tj’s Cerulean eyes were blazing with great dread and cracks that formed his soul. Confessing how he could be weak without this woman in front of his mom was giving him anxiety and hearing himself speak about Y/N was making his image look more delicate than ever. Yet, he gave zero fucks about it because when did his image became important anyways?

"Mom, I know she's the one for me," he croaked, swallowing the tight feeling inside his chest. A drop of warm tear fell on the side of his eyes, but he was quick to wipe it away a little roughly, blaming his soft heart because he was already crying. Again. "I don't give a damn about her ethnicity nor her race. I don't even care if she's rich or not because those things aren't important to me, "

Elaine Hammond got her tongue stuck in her throat as she saw her son in the verge of bawling his eyes out in front of her. There was more to his tears other than the fact that she was disapproving his decision about marriage. "All I care about is how she truly loves me back just the way I love her," Tj continued, voice cracking from his own words.

"Because that's what went wrong with the relationship that I had with Sean. Now, that I got everything in hand," he sighed, controlling the anger, sadness and disappointment all together. "Why would I even let her go?"

Was she really disapproving Tj's decision because she thought it was too soon for the both of them? Or was it because she sees him as her healing son who had his heart up his sleeve? Scared that he would actually break again and he wouldn't get to find the light anymore?

"Tj," Elaine started, shoulders and head straight as she was about to explain herself. "No, mom." her son cut her off, looking completely rigid. "You just don't want her to be a part of this family," Tj harshly spat.

"What's even wrong with her?" he was entirely skeptical at the idea of Y/N not being liked by his very own mother. It was much more dissatisfying when he heard the former president, specifically his father's who came barging in their conversation.

"Everything," Bud intervened and deadpanned, igniting the fire with more gas if that was even possible.

Tj could feel his nerves in a wreck. He was mad, frustrated for the hundred time because of his own family, especially towards his father. "We're not like you, dad! If you're worried because one of us may commit some fucking adultery like what you just did because I couldn't keep it in my pants--!"

"Thomas!" Elaine scolded and didn't let him finish his own sentence. She knew what he was going to say and there was no doubt that her son knew what his father did. It was not like it was a secret because it has been Bud's serious scandal back when he was still the president.

"So, you're teaming up with him now?!" said Tj, thoroughly upset by how their talk went.

"Thomas James Hammond! You are stepping in your boundaries!"

Tj shook his head in disdain, snickering from everything that was happening as of the moment. He faked a smile, a silhouette of another man coming from the kitchen. "Tj--" Dougie started, trying to understand both sides as he was hearing them out in the kitchen. The conversation was turning more heated and he knew if he didn't stop them then it'll get more nasty for the family.

"Even you too, Dougie?" his younger brother uttered, features getting hard and his cerulean eyes piercing through their skins.

"Fuck, this family is perfect!" His feigned laugh echoed through the room.

You were in the comfort room, currently counting the small pimples on your face, scrunching your nose when you've counted more than ten. Definitely not a perfect woman for Thomas James Hammond and your drunk self is pondering why he was still staying with you when he could've had proportioned models or even sons or daughters of known politicians.

Nevertheless, he chose to stay with you. A woman who got nothing but a kind heart to offer.

You were lucky to have him all to yourself.

Hush exchanges and deep discussions started from the living room. You can hear Tj's sexy, sultry rough voice coming from that certain room. As you were walking through the hallway, you've heard him sternly say things about how his family didn't want you to be part of his, like his mother didn't wholeheartedly accept you.

With Bud's words, it was a guarantee that what he said was finally confirmed. He really didn't like you for his son.

Yes, you were lucky. But, not for his family.

"Tj--" Dougie started to explain, but Tj cut him off with a harsh spat.

"No, no, no. No one really gives a shit,"

"Don't even bother coming to The Dome for its one year anniversary, go fucking throw all those invitations away for all I care!" Tj mumbled as he scrambled to his feet, he was completely drowning in his thoughts for you. He needed to find you because the room was beginning to choke him alive. "Even though, you all know how important you are to me,"

You were at the end of the room, hazy, dreary eyes seeing Tj striding across the room to find you. You fiddled with the lapels of his black coat resting on your shoulder. Basically, you looked like a drunk, kicked abandoned puppy who seemed to not be liked by his family.

A hug was all you wanted right now, and by the looks of your furious, teary eyed, healing Hammond, he desperately needs one too.

"Let's go, Y/N." Tj's warm, comforting hand grabbed yours. Roughly tugging you along in your heels. You were struggling in your shoes and by how fast and long his legs were. "T-Tj..Slow down, please?" you stuttered, alcohol running in your veins and it wasn't helping that the world was twirling in a vortex.

He abruptly stopped in front of their door, your forehead hitting his back with a soft thud. Automatically uttering a tender apology towards the latter. Tj spun in his heels, his long, soft, pretty fingers wrapping around your wrist a little too tightly. Probably because of his anger towards everything, yet you weren't complaining because you were too drunk to even retort. You were even numb from the alcohol and from the piercing words that went straight to the heart.

If only it was all but a dream..

"You guys are the fucking best," you heard Tj sarcastically spat towards his family who were shooting daggers at the both of you. They couldn't understand yet. No, not until they wanted to understand where Tj was coming from then they wouldn't get to.

They wouldn't get to because they've never understood him since he was in the white house.

Thomas James Hammond only needed love, understanding and affection. He just wanted to be loved. He has ever been a soft boy.

Y/N Y/L/N came along and gave him what he wanted, yet she wasn't downright accepted.

Just like TJ Hammond, and that was probably why they were good for each other.

Then the door slammed shut, vibrating their stunned souls. Nana revealed herself from the kitchen, a disappointed look on her pretty, aging face. She knew she liked Y/N's pure heart. More so for her grandson because she knew how he was whipped and ready to climb mountains for this woman.

Elaine's mother sipped on her martini, her voice cracking from age as she finally addressed the elephant in the room. "Elaine," she grabbed her daughter's attention. "You won't be getting to save Tj for the second time now because you've just showed how invalid he was. Y/N will." Elaine frowned tightly, trying hard not to roll her eyes as she was trying to process everything at hand.

Margaret huffed as she glanced at Elaine's ex-husband. "As for you, Bud.." She eventually snickered, twirling the glass in her feeble hands with a stressed out tone.

"You're a dick,”

GOSH. I LOVE TJ HAMMOND TOO MUCH. GO LIKE AND REBLOG THIS IF Y’ALL LOVE TJ HAMMOND! Sorry if it’s too long? Hehehe!

XOXO, TATA

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glapplebloom · 4 years

Photo

The beginning of the MLP Revisit Series.

It has been a while since I’ve seen the first episode. And knowing how it ends, it is very appropriate that it begins with Twilight reading a book. You know the story: Celestia’s sister got jealous, became Nightmare Moon and Celestia had to stop her. And despite this story being there, the only person who seem to notice is the bookworm...

I think she's more interested in books than friends.

I keep telling my viewing of this first episode was accidental, but I began to pay attention around here. A little girl show about making friends, and the main character doesn’t want to? That was intriguing. And it continue to grew my interest when we see her interact with Spike, saying words I believe would be over the head of the target demographic.

But you know the drill, Twilight thinks the legends are real, its gonna happen tonight, yet Celestia instead sends her to Ponyville to overlook things.

She said to check on preparations. I am her student, and I'll do my royal duty, but the fate of Equestria does not rest on me making friends.

Nine seasons later, not only does the fate of Equestria did rest on her making friends, but said friends will be essential for Equestria and the World’s fate.

First (after a Pinkie Sighting), we meet Applejack. This is a good way to introduce the two important things to her: The Apple Farm and the Apple Family. We also get a short introduction to the three other important members: Apple Bloom, Big McIntosh and Granny Smith.

Next is Rainbow Dash. Again, a great way to make a first impression. Between her and AJ, they became my two favorites. But while Rainbow Dash remained so, Applejack did get lower (only because others got so much higher). And of course, she cleared the skies in 10 Seconds Flat (not sure about flat, but it was within 10 seconds).

If you told me when I was first watching this Rarity was going to be the one I consider Best Pony, I wouldn’t believe you. It introduced her to the fashionista aspect of her, but we don’t get to see her true creative side until a few episodes later.

Next is Fluttershy, who again surprised me with how much she developed over the years. She definitely fills the cute quota. Also, funny scene about Twilight trying to get away from Fluttershy by saying Spike needs to go to bed. Shame you notice that the Spike Abuse the series is known for existed as early as the first episode.

And finally Pinkie Pie, who really shows off her energy and wacky nature. And with that, the first half of their introductions are complete. The second half will be during the second part, which I think splitting the episode and their introductions into two different parts is a great way to show them off as characters. What turned me off to another show around the time (Littlest Pet Shop) was them just introducing the characters in one song of a two parter.

But of course, after said introduction, it turns out Twilight was right. Nightmare Moon is indeed back and took Celestia somewhere. The guards tried to stop her but failed, so Twilight goes to the Library to find information on beating her, followed unknown to her by her new best friends. The key to victory is in the Everfree Forest...

'cause everypony who's ever come in has never come out!

List of creatures who have successfully came out of the Everfree Forest...

Twilight and Friends

Apple Bloom and Friends

Zecora

Trixie

Starlight and Friends

Student Six

Fluttershy as a Rabbit

The Princesses

Discord

Its amazing how the Forest doesn’t live up to the scares.

Now its time for the Element Test, with the weakest one being Applejack. I get this is to show her honesty, but why make it vague? Wouldn’t it have been easier to say “Let go Twilight. The others are safe so the fliers can catch you”. It is early in the series, so the writing can’t be as tight as later one.

Next is Fluttershy’s test who shows kindness when others choose to attack. I’m pointing out Rarity because based on what I expected of her I didn’t expect her to be a fighter. But here she is kicking a Manticore in the face. This is where the complexity of Rarity begins to show.

Pinkie’s Test is next and its the first song of the series. It is alright, but it isn’t for me. What I do like is how the others just reacted to her when she began singing. I thought “okay, so even in universe the singing is something you just got to get used to”. Little did I know how much music is going to come from others not Pinkie Pie.

And now Rarity’s test. It honestly surprised me that she was willing to cut off her own tail to help Steve Magnet. Her archetype tends to really dislike looking presentable, but here she is willing to cut her own tail to make someone happy for no reward other than to cross a river. Thus begins the rise of Best Pony.

Finally Rainbow Dash’s test. It honestly showed how ineffective Nightmare Moon is as a villain compared to others. “You can’t join us despite all you have to do is tie a rope together”. It is kind of weak. Especially when you compare to how the other Villains are when it comes to tactics or just raw power.

Finally, Nightmare Moon manages to separate Twilight from the others. Not far enough as minutes later they show up. And too bad for her Twilight figured out the Elements of Harmony and how to use them. And thanks to her new friends, they Rainbow Blast Nightmare Moon back to Luna and Celestia shows up (either freed or seeing Twilight succeed).

Long story short, Twilight is happy she succeeded, but is sad to leave her new friends. So Celestia says she can stay and write letters about her lessons in friendship. Nine seasons later Twilight will move back to Canterlot, as Ruler of Equestria.

Overall, it still holds up as a good first episode. Sure, it still has its flaws and its not as tight as later episodes, but it still does a good job at introducing the concept of the series and their characters. As for how it is rewritten... Well, you can read either the story (first 5 parts) or watch this video. Next week, Ticketmaster.

#MLP Revisit #mlp review #season 1 #Green Lantern Apple Bloom

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komahinasecretexchange · 6 years

Text

Title : Making sense

Author : @alyssaleandra (komakaikoma on twitter)

For : @fhantomhives

Rating/Warnings : G, mentions of Hinata’s surgical scars

Prompt : for the fic - first date; for the fanart - soft forehead touch

Author/Artist’s note : I hope the recipient enjoys!! I tried to make something very gentle and heartwarming! There is an image embedded within the story.

Things are hard when the former Class 77-B ship off to real life Jabberwock Island. Unlike its virtual counterpart, it’s been abandoned for who knows how long, and it shows. There’s insect infestations to counteract, living quarters to rebuild, water sources to purify… Hinata never imagined he’d see his friends farming, but here they are with Imposter (who everyone still affectionately refers to as Togami because it’s familiar) assigning tilling duties for the week. They can’t rely on Naegi and the others on mainland to supply too much, lest they out their location to those who’d prefer to see the Remnants of Despair at the bottom of the ocean.

Hinata knows that the others are looking to him for some measure of guidance, even if no one’s said anything outright. He’s Kamukura Izuru, after all. The Ultimate of Ultimates. The one who babysat everyone’s pods until each was safely out of cryosleep and in recovery plans that mainly he (and later Tsumiki) was responsible for formulating. But if he’s being honest with himself, he’s had his fair share of being an Ultimate, and he’s happy to take the supporting role to more charismatic figures like Sonia and Togami. The irony of longing for a normal life is not lost on him, but he thinks undergoing a major brain surgery, surviving a killing game, and getting spit out into a completely changed real world is enough excitement for a lifetime. He’s earned a bit of normalcy.

…So of course he’d find himself fawning over Komaeda Nagito, of all people, once things have settled down around Jabberwock. Hinata’s bewildered by it when he realizes what’s happened; it’s like an errant seed found root in his heart while he was distracted with fixing cottage roofs, then budded while he was modifying meal plans, and then the second he had a chance to breathe and check in on himself, full blown feelings had blossomed right under his nose.

It’s hard, and a little frustrating, that it had to be Komaeda, because nothing’s ever been easy with Komaeda. Hinata had nursed something of a crush on the boy when they’d “met” in the virtual world and he thought that Komaeda was just a kindhearted oddball with a pretty face. That whole thing got dashed to pieces during their time in the program once he realized there was at least a few dozen more layers to Komaeda he had yet to scratch the surface of, let alone come close to ever comprehending. It was unthinkable, for a time, that he’d ever be able to feel anything other than confusion with a tinge of what he can only describe as unease towards Komaeda. Now, though, with everyone recovering and filling in the cracks left by their past lives, he feels a bit like he first did on that digital shoreline in the beginning.

Except, no, it’s more profound this time because he feels like really understanding Komaeda is something that’s within arm’s reach for him, rather than an amorphous, far-off concept.

He can’t pretend to fully follow all of the hope-obsessed boy’s fervid ramblings about life and fate, but… nowadays, it’s almost endearing. It’s just routine enough that it’s become comforting. Like Komaeda’s some piece of music that was too dense and intimidating for Hinata to really appreciate the first time he heard it, but now he’s developed the taste for it.

It helps that Komaeda’s achingly pretty, and Hinata’s always been slightly weak for the quirky pretty ones. Even during their conflicts in the program, Hinata had to reel himself out of those serene gray eyes sometimes—really yank himself out of a few unwanted idle daydreams about the Ultimate Luck who caused everyone so much grief, and yet—and yet—Hinata never could shake the desperate desire to figure him out. He’d always thought if he could solve the inscrutable puzzle that was Komaeda, just maybe they could be on equal footing again someday.

And so, it’s somewhat frustrating that it had to be Komaeda because Hinata knows by now how complicated Komaeda likes to make things for himself (and everyone around him), but it also makes perfect sense that the living science experiment known as Hinata Hajime would set his sights on the shining beacon of maladaptive coping mechanisms known as Komaeda Nagito. Since when has Hinata ever taken the path of least resistance for anything?

They aimlessly spend time together just like they did back in the program before things really went south. They do chores together, tag-team scavenging together, and spend cool off periods walking down the beach together. Komaeda still tends to fret over doing anything where his misfortune flares could pose a threat to Hinata, but they’ve managed to go unscathed thus far.

They’re sitting hip-to-hip on the sand and watching the sunset after a particularly lengthy conversation about their childhoods, when it occurs to Hinata that this is basically a date. He feels his heart kickstart at the notion and a heat creep across his face, and he’s suddenly scared to move or even so much as glance at the boy next to him, lest Komaeda be made aware of Hinata’s sudden onslaught of self-consciousness. He’s kept completely quiet about his festering feelings for Komaeda and never once dared to imply that anything between them means any more or less than what he has with everyone else on the island. He’s shy, sure, but he also just isn’t certain of Komaeda can handle that kind of information. He can practically see the spiral that would unfurl if Komaeda were to confront the reality of knowing that someone cared for him.

“Oh, sorry, did I say too much? Ahaha… I never know when to stop talking…”

Hinata’s ears tune in to the sad note in Komaeda’s voice, and he realizes he’s been spacing out. “No, no! I just got lost in thought, sorry about that.” His throat feels tight, and there’s a dozen things he wants to say but doesn’t know how to. “Um… Komaeda?”

“Yes?” Komaeda tilts his head, attentive.

“I was wondering if… well, if you wanted to—to come over to my cottage tonight?” It’s funny, really, the way everyday words rattle up his ribs and get stuck on his tongue like they’re something profound or difficult, given everything else he’s been through by comparison. It’s funny and embarrassing and so normal that it would make Hinata laugh if he weren’t preoccupied with not humiliating himself in front of Komaeda right now. “Just to… I dunno, hang out. Maybe we could… watch one of the movies that Asahina-san sent over for us.”

Komaeda’s eyes widen just a little as he processes this invitation before relaxing back to their usual calm state. “Hinata-kun, aren’t we hanging out already? Or am I mistaken?”

“W-well, yeah! But this is…” Hinata’s voice drops to a fragile murmur, “…different.”

“Different? Hmm… I see.” Hinata isn’t sure what it is that Komaeda sees, and that makes him nervous. The slightly taller boy stands up and dusts sand off his bottom. “I’d be happy to accompany you.”

And he smiles, framed by oncoming nighttime and high tide, and Hinata’s heart stutters. Okay, cool, he accepted it without being weird. Even if I didn’t really explicitly call it a date or anything. God, my collar feels tight right now. He tugs at the offending collar and tries for a casual smile. “Cool. Cool.”

They follow the road back to the inland.

Silence transpires, and in the bit of quiet, Hinata takes note of Komaeda’s hands swinging gently at his sides. Hinata’s never thought about the idea of holding them before, at least not in public, but once it crosses his mind, he can’t stop thinking about it. How would Komaeda react if he just… went for it? Would he be startled? Angry? Beyond that, how would it feel? Would it be clammy? Soft? Would it feel good? …Well, the hand closest to him is the metal one, so that’s irrelevant.

A past Hinata might have been content to let the idea remain as just an idea, but the Hinata now knows that if he wants something, he should probably chase after it without sweating the details so much. He reaches out and takes the mechanical left hand into his right. It takes Komaeda a moment to notice, due to a lack of nerve endings.

“Oh…” he says faintly, too caught off guard for much else.

“Sh-should I not…?”

They’ve both stopped walking so that Komaeda can stare down at their point of contact. He’s yet to put on any kind of discernible emotion about it. “No, it’s okay. It’s—nice. But it’s scary, too.”

“Scary??” Hinata’s grip loosens, prepared to drop the other boy’s hand and forget he ever tried.

“Because it’s so nice.” Slowly, carefully, internal mechanisms work together to tighten Komaeda’s hold on Hinata so that the connection isn’t lost. “It’s… hard to not wonder when my luck might strike again. And I know you have luck now, too, somewhere inside of you… But…” He shakes his head and dismisses the thought. “Never mind. Let’s get going.”

Hinata wants to protest and prod Komaeda into finishing what he was saying, but the gentle pull of Komaeda’s hand takes his attention by the reins. He hasn’t rejected Hinata, and he isn’t running away. That small realization fills Hinata with relief that he didn’t know he was hoping for. His step feels lighter as he catches up to his friend’s side.

Hinata sets up a tape on an old CRT that Souda put together, sits on the floor with Komaeda, and immediately finds himself regretting suggesting a movie. It’s impossible to focus with so many things weighing on his mind and the subject of his inner turmoil right next to him.

As if sensing Hinata’s thoughts, Komaeda leans against him, so warm and tangible on his shoulder. It seems he’s equally unengaged with the movie before them. “Hey, Hinata-kun. Would you mind telling me that you hate me?”

“…Huh?” The odd request catches Hinata off guard. “Why on earth would I ever say that??”

“It’d be the greatest comfort to me right now. The bad luck of being hated by you… maybe it’d make everything even. Maybe I could enjoy being at your side like this a little longer without fearing what might come next. But I’m too much of a coward to actually try to make you hate me anymore.” He outstretches his right hand, flexing and relaxing the muscles. Even as he talks of being hated, he nuzzles closer into Hinata’s shoulder, as if afraid Hinata really will say he hates him. “I used to try so hard to invite disaster in my life when things were going too well. It scared me so much to enjoy the quiet moments. It scares me even now, to be close to you and have your friendship. I always tell myself that I need to stop being selfish and push you away for your own good, but… then I see you every morning, still alive, still smiling, and my greedy heart can’t help but want to bask in you.”

He shifts and makes direct eye contact with Hinata. As frank as he can be at times, Komaeda always tends to direct his gaze elsewhere during conversations. His hand, or his feet, or just somewhere in the far distance. It always makes him feel unreachable. But this time, his stare is open and earnest. “After everything that happened, I wonder what my standing with luck even is anymore. I died in the program… but then I was alive. But then I had the apocalypse and my own horrible actions to clean up after.” He reflexively rubs where metal and flesh meet on his left arm. “So in the end, was that all good luck or…”

And Komaeda cuts himself off, like he’ll never find an answer unless he just takes action already, and he leans into Hinata and brushes trembling lips against a dumbstruck mouth. His eyes are rife with a dozen conflicting emotions, as Komaeda often is, but this time it feels as though one wrong move will make him burst and everything will come spilling out unfiltered. His eyes widen in something akin to surprise, as if he wasn’t in control of his own actions. Before Komaeda has the chance to overthink things or run away, Hinata catches him by a jacket lapel and pulls him close. He uses his other hand to wrap gently around the back of Komaeda’s head, reveling in soft white curls, and pulls their foreheads together.

“Do you feel them? The scars, I mean.” Hinata pulls his short bangs aside. “Sometimes I forget they’re there. But they remind me of everything we all went through… that we’ve seen hell and death and everything in between, and we’re still here. In the grand scheme of things,” he gestures between them, “this isn’t going to be what ends the world. …At least, that’s what I think.”

Komaeda’s quiet, for a bit. He inhales like he forgot to breathe. Then he breaks, and laughs, and laughs. His eyes water from the force of it. “Aha-hahaha! Hahaha! Ha…” He holds Hinata for support, and Hinata holds him back. Once the fit has passed, he sniffs and straightens up, face still slightly quirked with hysteria. “Perhaps—perhaps you’re right. Maybe it’s arrogant to think luck cares that much about what makes me happy. Maybe it never cared. I’ve been wondering about that lately. It’s a scary thought.”

On the surface, it’s a pessimistic notion, but for Komaeda to yield to the idea that, to some extent, things just happen and that he should do something that makes him happy without psyching himself out of it for once, is the kind of paradigm shift Hinata expects only a virtual death and rebirth could have brought about. “Luck never cared about what any of us wanted. Not just me. And maybe it’s giving luck too much credit to say that it’s what brought me to you.” Then Komaeda does something unexpected—tilting his chin upwards at a pretty angle and kissing the raised skin of Hinata’s forehead scars. “But whatever did, I’m glad for it. I’m… unspeakably glad that you’re still here after everything, Hinata-kun.”

It’s always a toss-up with Komaeda on whether or not his penchant for saying really vulnerable things will embarrass him. This ends up being one of the times where it does, and he flushes a bright red and looks away, direct eye contact finally too much for him. He’s nearly confessed to Hinata once before, but that was ages ago in the program, under far different circumstances. Perhaps this is the first time Komaeda’s ever been really honest about how much Hinata means to him. No wrapping it up in vague non sequiturs about talent and hope. Just, “I’m glad you’re here.”

It’s more powerful than a typical confession in some regards.

“Me too. I’m glad you’re here, too.” Hinata feels his face burning as well, but he tries to will himself to remain cool. “…This feels pretty dumb to say now, but I was trying to ask you on a date earlier. So, uh, this is a date. …If you want it to be. I feel like, after… y’know, everything, we need things like this. Normal things.”

Komaeda smiles genuinely, and fondness bears down on Hinata full-force at the sight. “I figured that was what you were trying to get at. It’s really funny, Hinata-kun, when I look at you and think about how your sheer will power broke us out of the killing game and probably saved us all, and yet you can’t even ask someone out without being absurdly awkward about it. I think it’s something I like about you.”

Hinata burns more furiously but can’t find the words to retort, instead opting to fold his arms and stare at the ceiling. “W-well… yeah. Those are two totally different things!! Maybe if lives were on the line, I could find it in me to ask you out a little more tactfully…”

“Hmm, I see, so saving lives is easier than trying to date me, huh? I suppose that’s fair…”

“Hey, you…” Hinata snags Komaeda’s jacket lapels again and pulls him close. The banter ceases, and the two enjoy a normal date, like they deserve.

#komahina #komahina secret exchange #fanart #fanfiction

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hookedonapirate · 6 years

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Tangled Up In Blue

Water Under the Bridge (Chapter 28/?)

Summary: Fear for her unborn child, a bruised and broken Emma Swan is determined to escape an abusive marriage. After she drives a long way from home to a small town in Maine, she doesn’t think her life could get more complicated… that is until she ends up falling for her OBGYN, a blue-eyed British man who’s shielded his heart from love long ago. But he may be just what she needs to begin her healing process and start a new life for her child. If only nothing gets in the way.

Notes: I have been at war with this chapter, even long before I started writing it. But thanks to @rouhn, the part at the end made the chapter better than it would've been if not for her.

The main warning here is that it's definitely a tearjerker. I was balling my eyes out writing this, so please grab your tissues!

I have tried to answer all of the unanswered questions in this chapter, but if there’s anything I’m missing or something you’re still not sure about, please let me know. There will be one more chapter and an epilogue, and though I will be very sad when I have to wrap this story up, I am very excited to finally bring you the end of this universe very soon after working on this story for over a year. Thank yo so much for all of your support and for sticking with this story through everything I've thrown at you! You are all truly amazing!Thanks for reading!

*TRIGGER WARNING* Mentions and depictions of physical and verbal abuse/domestic violence

Rated: M

Catch Up: 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11 12 13 14 15 16 17 18 19 20 21 22 23 24 25 26 27

Check out deleted scenes: 1 2 3

Also available on: AO3 FF.N

“I’m going to need you to work a double shift.”

Panic washed over James, hearing his brother’s words through the phone before he threw a quick retort. “I'm sorry, I can't stay. I have plans tonight.” He promised Killian he would watch over Emma and Ian to make sure they stayed safe while Killian was gone… or rather, to make sure she wasn't getting herself into any trouble. He wanted to stop by their house unexpectedly just in case she had something up her sleeve.

“Can't you cancel your plans? Mary Margaret and I have to take care of Ian for the night.”

James furrowed his brows in confusion. “Why both of you?”

“Why does it matter? Emma told us she was leaving town with Killian for a medical conference and she was not at all keen on leaving Ian behind, so Mary Margaret and I both convinced her not to worry about a thing and that we'll both be watching the little duckling. So please, can you just do me this one favor and stay tonight?”

His stomach dropped, his mouth becoming dry as it hung open. Killian had left for the conference yesterday, and he’d left alone. If Emma lied to his brother and sister-in-law, then something was definitely going on. And seeing as he was stuck at work, there was nothing he could do about it.

“James? You there?”

“Yeah… yeah, I'm here,” he murmured, his mind clouded with worry. “I'll stay,” he agreed reluctantly, “but do me one favor?”

David sighed. “We already discussed this; I'm not giving you a raise just for pulling extra shifts-"

“No, not that,” James cut him off. “Keep little duckling safe.” His voice was wrecked as he tried to mask the concern enshrouding him.

“Of course we will,” David assured, a bit offended that his brother would need to remind him to do so.

Ending the call, James withdrew a few shaky breaths. He had to find a way to escape the B&B so he could get to Emma. But how? He couldn't exactly kick all of the guests out of their rooms.

Walking to the exit, he went outside, seeing the snow starting to fall as it landed softly on the ground. His stomach was tight with nerves, his eyes wandering around as he tried to decide what to do. Perhaps he should just call Emma and talk her out of this? He peered down at his phone, pulling up her contact information, his thumb hovering over her number.

Swallowing thickly, he pressed the button and brought the phone to his ear, listening as it rang. As he looked up, it proceeded to ring and ring until he heard her voicemail. James was cursing under his breath when he disconnected the line and began turning around as his gaze drifted down the road. He suddenly froze in his spot, but his reason had nothing to do with the brisk chill of the winter air.

The streets of Storybrooke were embellished with cheerful Christmas decorations; big red bows were tied around the streetlamps, brilliant blue bulbs helping to light up the town and wreaths hanging on the shop doors. The residents were bundled up in their winter coats, roaming the sidewalks with oversized Christmas gift bags, and the evening air was growing dim, so when his eyes fell upon the bright yellow bug parked in front of the pawnshop, the color stuck out like a sore thumb.

Forcing himself to return inside, he occupied himself to keep from growing too antsy, and every few minutes he would go outside to see that the bug was still there. A half an hour passed and he was about to head back inside when he finally saw Neal and Gold step outside.

James darted off to the side, scurrying along the storefronts while trying to be as nonchalant and unnoticeable as possible. Reaching the alley near Gold’s shop, he quickly ducked inside poking his head around the corner of the building to get a close-up of the two men. They seemed to be having an argument as James listened intently.

“Neal, I'm telling you; if you meet her at the park you're never going to see your son. It's just a trap.”

Neal sighed, looking around to make sure no one was passing by to overhear their conversation. “Then what? I just wait for her to appear around town and grab her? I already tried that once at the French restaurant, remember? That was your brilliant plan when you heard doctor douchebag over the bug you planted in the shop discussing his plans with my wife!”

So that was how Neal knew Emma and Killian were at the restaurant that night, James thought. Gold planted a bug in his own shop because he must have known there were people in this town nosey enough to break in. He must have known Emma and the people in her life were on to him. Now the question remained - why didn’t Gold turn James and Killian in for breaking and entering? Perhaps, it would have spoiled their carefully crafted plans. If Killian ended up being brought to the station, he couldn’t exactly take Emma out of Storybrooke, making her vulnerable for the taking. Plus, it would’ve exposed the fact that Gold knew where Emma and Killian would be that night, thus possibly linking the connection between Neal and Gold, James guessed.

“Just calm down and don’t get your panties in a twist,” Gold huffed in irritation, digging into the pocket of his jacket to pull out a slip of paper. “Go to this address. You told me the doctor won't be home, so I say give the wife an unexpected visit before she leaves to meet you.”

There was a twinkle in Neal’s eye, but he immediately became unsure about the suggestion. “But what if he has an alarm system? They’ve known I’ve been in town for a while; they’re obviously going to be prepared for an unexpected visit from me.”

“Don't try to break in,” Gold demanded firmly, shaking his head. “You hide and wait for her to leave the house. She'll be pulling out of the garage, and as soon as she opens the door, you rush inside and stop her. It's that simple,” he explained in a breezy tone.

Neal frowned. “So, I'm supposed to wait outside in the freezing cold?”

The shop owner rolled his eyes, and James was pretty sure he was going to slap the other man. Not that it would knock any sense into the asshole. “Do you want your wife and son back, or not?”

“Well, yeah but-”

“But nothing. You’ll follow my instructions, Dearie, or I'm taking back the ring I bought from her. Got it?”

“It’s my ring,” Neal spat. “I proposed to Emma with it.”

“And she sold it to me, so it's mine,” Gold reminded him, gritting his teeth, irritation lacing every word. “Now, are you gonna stand here and argue with me or you gonna do as I say so you can get your family back? This is the whole reason I agreed to help you, even with knowing how risky it was. We’re family and we both know how it feels to lose loved ones. We were reunited for a reason and I don’t want my efforts to go to waste, got it?”

“Yes, I got it,” Neal grumbled resentfully as he turned around, making his way to his car, and James retreated into the alley so as not to be seen. After Neal pulled away and Gold disappeared inside, James pulled out his phone, making a brisk dash to the B&B, his fingers frantically moving as he dialed Killian’s number.

“Killian, where are you? You need to get home NOW.”

There was silence on the other line, but he knew Killian was waiting for more answers; either that or he was frozen in fear, thinking something happened to Emma. James looked behind him, glancing at the pawn shop one more time before speaking again with a bit more clarification.

“You were right about Emma - she's in danger.”

He hung up the phone without explaining himself, but he was confident that Killian would do everything he could to rush back home. James tried to stay calm, but he couldn't. He couldn't let Neal get his filthy hands on Emma again, but there were visitors piling inside the Bed and Breakfast, so he did the only thing he could think of. He knew David would finally can his ass for this, but he didn't care. He needed to get to Emma.

“Sorry, there are no more rooms available for the night.” There were several.

As disappointed as the group was, James was able to usher them out without problems before making a sign to leave on the desk, letting people know he'd be returning soon.

~~~

Emma was sipping a soothing cup of hot cocoa in her cozy pink pajamas and fuzzy slippers, her lips forming a weary smile. Her body was still sore, but it was difficult to complain when she was surrounded by people who loved her. They were all sitting around the fireplace enjoying the company and celebration of the holiday. And Ian was safe and secure in Mary Margaret’s arms as David sat next to her with his arm wrapped around her shoulder and kissed her forehead.

It was a bright, cheerful Christmas morning, and it certainly looked the part. Everything that had been ruined by Neal was cleaned up, the photo frames were replaced and the decorations were still intact. The Christmas tree was lit up next to the window and the curtains were open, affording a wintery view of the backyard with the woods behind the house stretching wide and covered in a soft blanket of white. The only thing that could make the morning more perfect would be the addition of little children running around and playing with their new toys. But the group didn't seem to mind; they opened presents in between passing Ian around the room, making sure everyone got their chance to spend time with him.

The last several days had been rough. She'd spent the night in the hospital before she couldn't stand being there anymore and wanted to leave. She had to go the Sheriff's station for questioning, and still had this feeling in the pit of her stomach. It was something she couldn't quite explain, but Killian had to keep reminding her that Neal was in a cell and he could be sent to prison for a very long time. There were so many things going against him - bank robbery, breaking and entering, threatening and assaulting an officer, abuse, kidnapping. The list went on and on.

Gold was also arrested for kidnapping, and he confessed to everything in hopes of shortening his sentence while Belle took Collette and went to live with her father. It turned out Gold and Neal were half-brothers and had the same father, and Hades Underbrooke had dug up this information when he was trying to locate Neal’s whereabouts so he could contact him. James had informed her Hades previously ran a small private investigative firm, and had hired James in the past to perform his dirty work. When James wouldn’t take the job, Hades wanted him to pay for turning him down, so when he found Neal in Tallahassee, he told him he was James. He also used the information he found on the connection between the half-brothers to bribe Gold into helping him. As soon as the kidnapping scheme had failed, Hades had fled town and no one had seen him since.

There was also the fact that Killian didn’t actually go to the conference like he’d said, but she couldn’t be too upset because she hadn’t exactly been honest with him either. They both lied to protect each other, and she guessed it was a good thing he was able to get to her when he did. She didn’t even want to think of the damage Neal would’ve done before the police arrived, and although Emma couldn’t rid herself completely from the memories of that night, she was hopeful for the future.

It still felt surreal though. She didn’t have to be on the edge anymore. She didn’t have to twitch with fear, afraid that Neal might jump out of nowhere and attack her at any moment. She was still opening up to the idea of being free from him, but it would take some time for her to fully believe she could be.

“Emma, would you like to open your gift from me?” Killian’s voice towed Emma from her thoughts, and she looked over at him as he held a small, rectangular-shaped gift on his hand.

She smiled, accepting it while bracing herself. She hoped he didn’t go all out, and she hoped he liked the gift she got for him. Peeling back the perfect, silver wrapping paper, she revealed a dark blue gift box and carefully removed the lid. The gift inside stole her breath. It was a sterling silver bracelet, and held two charms with twenty-four karat gold-plated accents. One was a heart engraved with her son’s name and a blue topaz crystal birthstone, representing the month of December - the month he was born. The other was a pair of baby feet aligned with the same birthstones.

“I hope it’s okay, love. You can of course add more charms to it with the names of loved ones and their birthstones, or whatever you’d like.”

Emma looked up at him, her eyes clouded with tears. It still amazed her that she actually had people in her life she could call loved ones, although she was pretty sure he was referring to future loved ones, as in additions to their family. Emma wasn’t opposed to the idea.

“It’s absolutely perfect.” Her words were strangled as she managed a smile. “Thank you.”

“Of course, sweetness,” he cooed, offering a small grin as he took the bracelet out of the box and fastened it around her wrist, dropping a kiss to her forehead. “Anything for you, my love.”

Emma’s stomach was coiled with knots as she handed him his gift. “It’s… I hope you’ll like it,” she stuttered. “I’m not very good at picking out gifts,” she admitted timidly.

Killian’s smile only grew. “That is okay, love. It would be difficult to top the gifts you’ve already blessed me with - you and Ian.”

Emma’s heart fluttered, and he accepted the proffered present, removing the wrapping paper to expose a square gift box. Opening it up, he pulled out a bronze mechanical pocket watch hanging from a chain adorned with beads, the case mounted with a skull and crossbones. To Emma’s relief, a wide grin overtook Killian’s face as he opened it up. The inside revealed the watch face and the gold cogs and inner workings behind it.

“Turn it over,” Emma told him, and he raised a brow in curiosity as he complied, closing the watch and flipping it over.

The back was engraved in beautiful lettering that he read out loud, “Every second that goes by, my heart contracts for you.”

“I would’ve gotten you a stethoscope but a watch seemed way less lame. Plus you can use it to keep track of your patients’ labor contractions too,” she laughed.

“Aww, that is so sweet,” Cordelia chirped with googly eyes.

“That’s a wonderful gift, Emma,” Rosabell complimented.

“And the most romantic gift award goes to Emma,” David added with a soft chuckle. “Although, the bracelet is a very close second.”

“Ruby and I helped her pick it out,” Mary Margaret boasted with a vibrant smile.

“When I saw this in the jewelry case, I knew it would perfect for you,” she told Killian.

He laughed, sweetly kissing Emma’s lips. “And you said you weren’t good at picking out gifts. This is brilliant, love. Thank you.”

Emma was blushing as she gave a soft shrug.

They all finished opening their presents, and had a big Christmas dinner in the afternoon that the ladies prepared while the men watched football. The day was flying by pleasantly, and after dinner, the guys washed the dishes, allowing the women to relax in the living room. Emma was laying a sleeping Ian in his bassinet in the other room when Mary Margaret came up behind her, placing a gentle hand on her shoulder.

“You okay, Emma?”

Emma was surprised as she turned around, facing her friend who had a concerned expression on her face. “Yeah, I’m fine,” she assured with a smile.

“Well, I know you’ve been through a lot, and I just wanted to make sure. What you did was really risky… but I’m glad you’re okay,” Mary Margaret confessed, and Emma was taken aback. She wasn’t surprised that her friend cared for her, but she didn’t realize how much. Judging the deeply worried look in her eyes, Emma could see the wreckage embedded within.

“I know it was. And I’m sorry I worried everyone, but it was something I needed to do. I had to make sure my son was safe. I couldn’t let Neal hurt him.”

“I know, Emma. You don’t have to explain yourself to me. You were thinking like a mother. I just wanted to say that… you’ve grown so much since you came here. And I’m glad you showed up in our lives.”

Again, Emma felt like crying as a smile bloomed over her face. She didn’t realize the effect her actions had on everyone. “I’m glad too,” she murmured adamantly.

“Oh and I know that you used the money you got from your engagement ring to pay for our trip,” the brunette pointed out suddenly.

Emma’s eyes widened in surprise. “How did you-?”

“Killian told us. And don’t be mad at him; I kind of forced it out of him,” she laughed.

“Well, I wanted to do something special for the both of you.”

“I know, and I just wanted to thank you again. You’re a good friend, Emma.”

“You are too.” Emma’s heart was surrounded in warmth, and she was drawing Mary Margaret into a hug when she peered up, seeing James quietly enter the room so as not to disturb Ian.

The brunette left as Emma crossed her arms, eyeing him suspiciously.

“How is it that whenever hugs are involved, you always show up?”

James chuckled. “I don’t know, I guess I’m attracted to them.” He opened his arms, and she answered him with a hug, sighing in to him. “At least I’m not the last person to get one this time,” James murmured, kissing her cheek and tucking his face into the crook of her neck.

Emma's heart twisted. She knew he’d been concerned about her. She knew she’d put him - all of her friends and Killian - through hell by bating Neal into Killian's home and turning off the alarm so he could get in. Plus she’d had doubts when Neal pointed fingers at James. Of all the people in her life, she had believed the one person who had hurt her and damaged her the most. That was the influence Neal had over her before that night. She had guessed until she was finally able to stand her ground, he would've always had his claws in her - always had power over her - no matter how much she hated him.

“I’m sorry I didn’t believe you...”

“Hey, none of that,” he soothed, affectionately stroking her hair. “You don’t have to apologize. I deserved it. I haven’t exactly been the ideal citizen of this town. And you are too important to me to let him get in between our friendship.”

Emma’s heart fluttered at the sincerity in his voice, and she squeezed him a bit tighter, resting her head on his shoulder, feeling comforted by his words. It had been a while since they had been together like this. Everything had been hectic lately and with James seeing someone and Emma doubting him, she felt like had lost her best friend, so it was nice to be in his arms and hear his voice. “I missed you, James,” she whispered softly.

“Missed you, too… so much. You had us worried though. I’m just glad Killian made it when he did.” James pulled away, his eyes full of emotion.

“I know… I’m…” Flooded with guilt, Emma lowered her gaze to the floor. She hated what she had put everyone through.

“Hey…” James captured her chin, lifting it up so she was looking him in his vibrant blue eyes. “It’s all over with now. Neal can’t hurt you anymore, and none of us are going anywhere. We all love you Emma, and that’s not going to change.”

“I know,” she breathed, offering a small smile. “I’m just thankful to have all of you in my life, even though I don’t deserve it.”

“You deserve all of it and more,” he argued quickly and took her hand, lifting it to his lips and pressing a kiss to the back of it. When he lifted his head again, a storm was brewing in his eyes as he encased her hand with his, rubbing the knuckles with his thumb. “Besides, if anyone’s to blame, it should be me.”

“But, James, you turned down the job. None of this was your fault.”

“If I had never become involved with Hades in the first place, he would have-”

“He would have done the exact same thing. You are not responsible for his actions.”

“But maybe he would have left town if he couldn’t get anyone to do his dirty work and if he had to pay for a room at the B&B. He would’ve gone off to find someone else.”

“Yeah and maybe if I had left Neal a long time ago, if I had never married him, he would’ve found someone else to hurt and abuse. The important thing is you stood up to Hades and turned him down. You’re a good guy, James. Don’t forget it.”

The corner of his mouth pulled into a bashful grin. “Thanks, Emma.”

She offered a similar smile in return. “No problem.”

James stepped up to Ian’s bassinet, watching him as he slept. “I’m just glad the little duckling’s okay.”

“I don’t know what I would do if anything happened to him. He’s the best thing that’s ever happened to me. I would do anything to protect him.”

“And he will grow up and do anything to protect his mother. He will be strong and caring like her, and he’ll have the women swooning over him because he’ll be a handsome stud since he’s acquired his mother’s good looks. Plus, he has those big blue eyes to make the ladies melt.”

Emma smiled and nodded in agreement. “Men with blue eyes tend to have that effect.”

James shrugged as though he were unsure of the statement. “I know I do. I mean, do you think Rose is with me because of my charming personality? I think not; that’s David's department.”

Emma laughed. “I think there’s more to like about you than just your blue eyes.”

James blushed and smiled. “Well thank you, Emma. I do try. I mean, I still think Rose is way too good for me, but I’ve been an outstanding gentleman with her. And very respectful. You could say I’ve come a long way.”

“I know you have, James. And I have complete confidence that you won’t disappoint her.”

A wide, cocky grin cracked his lips, his eyes lighting up with mischief. “Oh, I’m quite confident I won't either.”

Emma knitted her brows in confusion. “I was talking about in the long run, but why do I have a feeling you’re referring to something else?”

James shrugged, feigning innocence. “I’m truly touched that you have faith in me, believe me. No one else ever has, but I know there is one thing she won’t be disappointed with.”

“And what’s that?” She narrowed her eyes, not sure if she actually wanted to know the answer to that.

He cleared his throat and suddenly seemed nervous as he spoke quietly. “I will tell you, but it’s our secret, okay?”

She nodded. “Of course.”

“Rose and I haven’t had sex yet.”

Emma’s mouth dropped almost instantly, surprised by this information.

“I told you I’ve been an outstanding gentleman,” he reminded her.

“Are you sure you aren’t gay?” she teased, throwing his own words back at him from when he asked the same thing about Killian.

James frowned. “No, I’m not gay.”

“That’s something I didn’t really need to know.”

The sound of Killian’s voice made Emma’s heart flutter as he came up behind her and wrapped his arms around her waist, pressing gentle kisses to her cheek. She melted, her body surrendering to him and getting caught up in his warmth.

“Just don’t go around kissing my Swan, and you and I have no problems.”

James rolled his eyes in irritation. “It was just a small peck, showing affection for my friend after I was afraid I would never see her again. Should I just be prepared, knowing that you’re going to constantly toss that in my face in the future?”

Killian shrugged, considering the idea. “Perhaps, but since you helped me out with Neal and have proven to me over and over that you care for Emma, this will be the last time,” he promised sincerely as he nosed her cheek and tightened his hold around her.

James suddenly looked up, a broad smile blooming over his face.

“There you are. I’ve been looking for you,” Rosabell said, approaching James and kissing his cheek. “What do you say we go home now? A big dinner makes me want to take a long nap.”

“I agree,” James took her hand, glancing between Emma and Killian. “Thank you for having us over.”

“Of course, mate,” Killian said with a small smile as he extended his hand.

Accepting the gesture, James shook it before drawing Emma into a hug.

Emma looked over his shoulder, seeing the uneasiness and tension brewing between Killian and Rosabell. When they were all in a group together, it was different, but with just the two of them standing in front of each other and staring awkwardly away from each other, Emma knew there was something going on that she wasn’t aware of.

“Thanks for everything Killian,” Rosabell said and tentatively shook his hand.

“Thank you both for coming over to join us.”

The four of them walked out of the room, and James and Rosabell said goodbye to rest of the gang before they left.

Emma didn’t question it, but there was an unsettling feeling seated in the pit of her stomach that wouldn’t disappear.

With warm hugs and goodbyes, Liam, Cordelia and the Nolan couple left shortly afterwards. Killian shut the front door behind them and turned around as Emma crossed her arms, staring at him with uncertain eyes. He observed her in concern, the smile that had been etched into his lips for most of the day slowly fading. “Emma? What’s wrong, love?”

Emma decided she was just going to be blunt. She needed to know the truth. She needed everything to be laid out on the table. “What’s going on between you and Rosabell?”

Confusion flashed in his eyes and he stepped closer, but Emma didn’t budge. “What do you mean?” he asked, hurt by her words.

“I mean you’re supposed to be friends and yet neither of you have barely said two words to each other all day. You both seem awkward and uncomfortable around each other. You told me that you worked things out with her, but there’s something you’re not telling me,” Emma accused wearily. “I trust you, Killian, with all my heart, but you’ve proven to me you’re capable of hiding things from me to protect me. I don't want that. I want us to be open and honest with each other.”

Killian appeared to be stunned. “Like you've been honest with me? You could’ve gotten yourself killed, love,” he bit out in a harsh tone.

The words screeched through her ears; she didn’t want to start a fight, but there were too many things that had been unspoken and needed to be spoken. They needed to be acknowledged. “Killian, I know that, but I told you, I did it for us.”

A wave of apology came over him and his eyes fell to the ground as he expelled a soft sigh. “I know that, love. But I was still worried sick about you and Ian. I love you both and I don't want to lose either of you.”

“I can’t take back what I did, but I can tell you I hated lying to you. I hated that we had to lie to each other, even though we did it for the right reasons. I want us to tell each other everything.”

“Agreed, Emma. And I assure you the only thing I kept from you regarding me and Rosabell is… she threatened to go to the board about us if I didn’t take the initiative and do it myself. And I hated how she looked at me all day and how she felt bad that she had given me this ultimatum, so on Monday I’m going to tell them.”

Emma’s eyes widened in disbelief. “What? Why? You haven’t been my doctor in months.”

“It doesn’t matter love. Romantic relationships between doctors and patients are forbidden, even after treatment or care has ended. And with Neal and the hearings coming up, you know he’s going to bring up our relationship. It’s best to confess now before it blows up in my face and I lose my patients and my practice.”

Emma shook her head. She couldn’t believe he was actually going to do this. “I can’t let you do that.”

“Emma-”

“No, I can’t let you get in trouble because of me. I’ve already put your job at risk by falling for you. I can’t let you do this.”

“And why not? You risk your life for me and your son, but you can’t let me risk my career for you and Ian?”

“Killian…” Emma’s voice was strangled as she stumbled for words. She didn’t know how to respond to that. He raised a fair point but she still couldn’t let him ruin his life for her. “You’re an amazing doctor. You help women through their pregnancy, you encourage and inspire them and you help them give birth, and I…” her voice trailed off as she felt the threat of tears wetting her eyes, “I’m just a waitress. I’m not worth ruining your life.”

Killian’s eyes grew dark and hooded; he appeared to be completely and utterly wrecked. “You really have no idea, do you? You still don’t understand that I would literally do anything for you. You ask me to run through fire, and I’d run through fire, gladly.”

“Then please don’t go to the board,” she pleaded.

“I have to, Emma. I don’t have a choice. If I don’t, Rose will. And once I do then we can put this all behind us.”

“But don’t you see? I can’t! This is all far from being over! Yes, Neal’s in jail, but I’ll have to face him in court and I’ll have to rehash everything he ever did to me. I’ll have to relive those moments when he belittled me and hit me and made me feel like nothing! When he tore me apart in every possible way he could.” The last few words were strangled before she suddenly burst out crying, no longer able to hold back.

Killian’s demeanor visibly transformed, his heart clearly aching for her. He wrapped his arms around her, holding her close to his chest and allowing her to sob into his shirt. “I know, love,” he whispered, gently stroking her hair. “I know, and I will be there for you through everything.”

Emma shook her head and pulled away from him, wiping her tears and sniffling. “I can’t let you do that. I can’t drag you through this mess with me.”

Killian stared at her blankly. “What do you mean? I’m already in this.”

“But, I need you not to be. Killian, I came to this town a damaged woman, and I barely started healing when you came into my life. I started loving you when I thought I could never give my heart to anyone ever again. And I want to give you everything I am - everything I have - but right now I don't even know who I am anymore. I need to figure that out. I don't want to drag you through what I have to face with Neal. I want you to be able to live your life and fulfill your dream of opening a fertility clinic.”

Killian’s eyes were welling up with tears as he stared back at her. “What are you- what are you saying, Emma?”

Emma swallowed down her fear as she held his gaze. “I’m saying I should leave with Ian for a while. I think I need some time to figure out who I am again. I’ve been with Neal since I was seventeen and then I met you, and I haven’t had a chance to breathe.”

A tear slid down Killian’s cheek, making her heart hurt. But she knew this was for the best.

She lifted her hand, wiping his tear away with her thumb as she mustered a small smile. “It won’t be forever. I couldn’t stay away from you if I wanted to.” Emma pressed her forehead to his and she closed her eyes, another tear rolling down her cheek. “Please… I need to do this.”

“But where will you go?” he asked, cupping her face in his hands.

“I’m not sure. Maybe Boston. Or maybe Regina would have a good recommendation since I’ll still have to present in court.”

He nodded and pulled her close, holding her tight. She could feel him starting to shake as a choked-out sob left his lips. “If you think this is the best thing for you and Ian, I will… I will let you go.” The whispered, broken words barely escaped his mouth, but the tears were flowing freely down his face. “I don’t want you to leave, but I want you to be comfortable with who you are. And just know that you’ll always be my Swan, no matter what.”

“Always.”

~~~

Killian couldn't believe Emma was actually leaving. Even if it wouldn’t be for good, he was dreading it with everything inside of him. He cursed himself for every time he wasn’t honest with her and for not going to the board immediately, but none of that mattered now. Emma needed to do this and he knew that. All he wanted was for her and Ian to be happy. All he wanted was for them to feed off of each other’s strength. He never wanted to see them hurting or in pain. He wanted the best for them, even if he didn’t get to witness it.

He couldn’t believe how much of an impact she had on him over the course of a few months, but if felt like much longer. If felt like he had known her for years. When she touched him, it sure as hell felt like years’ worth of healing - years’ worth of love.

“We will miss you Emma… very much,” Mary Margaret murmured, embracing Emma into a hug.

It was a sunny winter afternoon, and unseasonably warm as they gathered outside of the Nolan’s loft, but to Killian, it was cold and dreary and unpleasant. He kept telling himself he couldn’t think like that though. This was Emma’s chance. It was her chance to go out of this small, boring town of Storybrooke and to heal and find happiness.

Besides, it wouldn't be forever, he kept reminding himself.

“I will miss you all so much.”

There were many tears and hugs and long, heartfelt words of endearment as Emma said goodbye to all of the people she’d grown to love. Liam and Cordelia were taking the situation better than Killian had originally expected, but he knew they were sad to see her go.

Emma promised to keep in touch with all of them and send them updates about Ian. James was traveling with her to make she arrived to Boston safely and got settled in properly. Rosabell wasn’t happy about it, but if given the choice, James would pick his best friend who had gone through hell and back. Killian wasn’t all that happy about it either, but then again, there was nothing that could really make it better. Only knowing that Emma and Ian would get there safely was what kept him sane.

“If anything happens to them, I’ll have your head, James. You know that right?”

“Then it’s a good thing nothing will.”

Killian was swaying Emma’s son delicately in his arms, smiling down at him through teary eyes, knowing the inevitable end was near. He knew Ian would soon be taken away, but he tried not to think too much about that. He wanted to enjoy the few moments while they lasted.

“Now remember, lad…” he whispered with a shaky breath, his thumb stroking his cheek as Ian blinked up at Killian with those big blue eyes that were brighter than the sun. “Be good for your mum. And don’t let her get into trouble.” Killian tried desperately to hold back his tears. And it didn’t matter that there were many people to witness him in shambles, but he had to stay strong because he knew this was the best thing for Emma. He wanted her to able to cope with things in her own way. He wanted her to be healthy and strong and not be held down or haunted by her traumatic past. The future he envisioned for Emma and Ian didn’t allow for anything less. “I know you’ll look out for each other.” A tear managed to roll down his cheek as he lifted Emma’s baby boy, pressing a soft kiss to his forehead. “And maybe one day we will be a family again.”

“Of course we will.” Emma’s sweet voice pulled Killian’s gaze and he flashed a frail smile. “You’ll always be our home no matter where we are. We both love you, and we’ll never stop.”

Her words had a comforting effect on him, his heart overwhelmed with joy. “And both of you will always be my home. But never forget you’ll always have a home here with me. Whenever you decide, or if you decide to come back. I’ll always be here waiting for you, my love.”

Emma’s green eyes were glossy with tears as she smiled and threw her arms around him and Ian, holding them close. “I love you so much,” she whispered in his ear.

“I love you. More than you will ever know.” Emma found his lips, capturing them softly and tenderly, and yet her movements were desperate as she curled her hand around the back of his neck, her fingers sifting through his hair. He didn’t even care who was watching them.

Killian breathed her in, memorizing everything about her - her scent, her warmth, the feel of her body against his, her lips, the taste of her tongue, the taste of her, the sound of her voice, her breathing - before he had to let her go. It was one of the most difficult things he had to do, but somehow he let her go… eventually.

Emma licked her lips, her cheeks stained with tears as she held his scruffy cheeks in her hands. Both of them were silent for a few moments; there were so many things he wanted to say, but he didn’t have the energy to say them out loud.

“Please don’t say goodbye,” he muttered, his voice cracked and shattered. Hearing her say goodbye may possibly kill him.

“I’ll see you again. How’s that?”

A smile curved his lips as he cradled the back of her head and placed one more kiss on her lips. “I’ll be counting on it.”

Letting go of Ian was another one of the most difficult things he ever had to do, and when Emma scooped her son up in her arms, he never tore his eyes away.

“Are you ready, Emma?” James asked as he waited patiently by the passenger’s side. He would be driving them there but then flying back without being an interference with Emma's need to be on her own.

Her eyes were glued to Killian’s and she didn’t nod or acknowledge the question; she only said everything to Killian with her eyes she couldn’t possibly put together in words as he did the same.

When she started to turn around, she paused, looking back at Killian. “Oh and if you do go to the board… I know everything will work out fine. Everyone has faith in you and trusts you. If they can’t see what a great doctor you are then it’s their loss.”

With that said, she walked away and strapped Ian into his car seat before she stole one more glance of him and waved before getting in the passenger seat.

Killian waved back as he watched James drive them away, his heart crumbling a bit in his chest.

~~~

“You doing okay, Em?” James asked, and as they crossed the town line, Emma couldn’t help but remember the first time she came to this town. And it was all because of a flat tire that she decided to get a room for the night. A flat tire changed everything for her. She had been scared, a nervous wreck, but the people in Storybrooke had quickly wormed their way into her heart. And she would never forget that.

Now, because of her, she had worried so many of them. She had put Killian and James in danger because they wanted to protect her. Not to mention, what if Gold or Hades had wanted to find Ian while he was under the care of the Nolan’s? She could have put all three of them in danger. And August had gotten shot in the leg, causing extensive permanent damage, so Graham was taking over as Sheriff for the time being. Ad it was all because of her. She was afraid that the guilt would always be plaguing her and eating way her insides - another reason why she needed to leave. She felt too guilty.

“Yeah, I’m fine. What were you saying?”

She was sure James didn’t believe her, but he didn’t pressure her, and instead continued talking about whatever he was talking about when she’d become lost in her thoughts. She was grateful he was going with her and that she and her son wouldn’t be alone during the drive there. At the same time, she knew she needed some space and she needed time to reflect on everything that had happened. During her time with Neal, she had lost her identity somewhere along the line, and she’d never had a chance to really get it back. Emma always had issues with self-confidence, probably because nothing she ever did for Neal was ever good enough. Most of time, he treated her like chewed up gum on the bottom of his shoe, so that was the value she had placed on herself.

Being with Killian had helped her gain some of that confidence back, but to Emma, it wasn’t good enough. How could she give her heart and soul to someone and accept them completely if she didn’t completely love and accept herself? The last thing she wanted to do was hurt Killian, but knowing she wouldn’t be able stay away for too long was the only thing helping her cope with all of this. Emma wanted to be open with him; she wanted to give him everything he deserved and in order to do that, she needed to take this trip. She needed to take a step back and separate herself from everything. She needed to forgive herself for everything she allowed Neal to do to her, for what she put herself through and for what she had put all of her loved ones through.

But to be completely honest, she really just wanted to go back home, run into Killian’s arms and hold him and Ian like there was no tomorrow.

A/N: To those of you who read A Helping Hand, I'm taking votes on which story I should update after this because I don't like to leave you lovelies hanging for too long, so let me know. You can leave a comment, send me a pm or an ask :)

@resident-of-storybrooke @followbatb @weplaydumbb @strawberrycupcakeprincess @shady-swan-jones @kmomof4 @ultraluckycatnd @phoenixsxul @eala-captian @teamhook @i-love-books2014 @andiirivera @piratesbooty63fan @missclois86 @fallensites @harrietmjones @winterbaby89 @wordsmith-storyweaver @andiirivera @slimacwrites @jennjenn615 @its-about-bloody-time-cs @liloproductions @followbatb @klar425 @hey-it-is-jess @ascolinwishes

#cs ff #cs ff au #captain swan #cs fic #tangled up in blue #my fic

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magmasliveblogs · 5 years

Text

1.24

i am back! to recap last chapter we met flos, a king with a large personality who is apparently a king of destruction

The darkness hides many imperfections. The nether shade conceals those who find the sun taxing and bright light an anathema. The faint light that is not truest blackness but dark shade, where only faint outlines are visible conjures nightmares for humans and those related to their kind.

But some call the shadows home.

Two individuals stood and conversed in the darkness of a room. Exactly where the room was located was unimportant. Rooms had little meaning here, in the catacombs and endless labyrinth of passages.

One of them was female. The other was Klbkch. The female shifted and in the darkness her deep voice rumbled through the air.

“Do I understand you correctly, Klbkch? Do you truly call for an Expedition after all the folly that has resulted thus far?”

Klbkch shook his head.

“No, my lady. I merely request that a few of the Workers—perhaps ten or twenty—may be allowed to leave the city in my care. They would visit a local inn for several hours before returning.”

“Interesting.”

The word rolled outwards, rich, darkly velvet with hidden connotation and meaning. The female paused.

“Is this an idea of yours, dear Klbkch? Dare I hope that my Prognugator has changed so?”

Klbkch shook his head.

“I remain as always, lady. I regret that this is not my initiative. She – the innkeeper of which I spoke – she requested it of me.”

Surprise flicked through the female’s deep voice as it echoed in the cavernous chamber.

“She did? What species would desire the presence of Workers if not to work?”

“A Human. And she did not ask for the Workers specifically. Rather, she was inclined to sell a foodstuff to our people. Acid flies. She wishes to earn money by gaining our business.”

“And this Human is genuine?”

“To the best of my knowledge and ability, I believe her so.”

Again, surprise was the primary emotion in the female’s voice.

“You, Prognugator? You believe? Then you are changed, truly. What is the name of this Human who has changed you so?”

Klbkch hesitated. He bowed his head in the direction of the female.

“Her name is Erin Solstice, lady. And I believe—yes, I believe the experience may help further the Plan. At the very least, it would help increase her trust of our kind.”

“And why should I entertain her request?”

Klbkch spread his hands outward. They were humanoid hands, at least in that they resembled them more than an insect’s feelers. The same could not be said of the appendages of the female.

“Has the Plan changed? Do we no longer seek to improve relations with other species?”

The female moved in the darkness. Her voice changed, hissing softly in regret and frustration.

“The Plan has not changed, Klbkch. But we have. And not in the ways that we desire. No; the change comes from the Others. They have begun to again question the Plan.”

Klbkch looked up. His hands moved unconsciously to the twin swords at his waist.

“They question your will, lady?”

She waved a languid feeler at him.

“Not as of such. Calm yourself, my champion. My authority is undiminished. And yet. The Others move, Klbkch. They speak of sending out envoys, of raising an army.”

The male Antinium looked up sharply. The antennae on his head twitched.

“Do you mean to say they intend to repeat the First Experiments? If I may offer my counsel, that would be…unwise.”

She nodded in the blackness.

“Yes. But they grow impatient with time. So their foolishness may yet come to pass if something is not done. That is why I will allow this risk. Take twelve Workers. Let them visit this Solstice child.”

Klbkch knelt on one segmented knee.

“Thank you, my lady. I will not betray your trust in me.”

A great sigh echoed through the room, shifting Klbkch’s antennas as the air moved.

“Of that I have no doubt. But I need more than your loyalty. Klbkchhezeim of the Free. I must have success. Can you promise me that?”

He was still as he knelt before her. Then Klbkch looked up and shook his head slowly.

“I cannot. But I will try.”

“Very well. Try, then.”

Klbkch nodded. He stood, and began to stride out of the room with quick, light movements.

“Klbkch.”

He turned. In the darkness a large feeler pointed at him and a titanic shape moved.

“You must not fail in this task. Too long has the Plan faltered. If the next few generations should fail, I fear more will fall back into the old ways.”

Klbkch bowed his head.

“I will ensure that all goes well, my lady. Erin Solstice is not hostile to our kind. I believe she will be a positive influence for them.”

“Then go. But there is one more thing I ask of you.”

“Yes, my lady?”

“Ahem. These flies…how do they taste?”

“I shall bring you a sample, my Queen.”

“Good.”

none of those capitalized terms used, ie: expiedition, others, plan, experiment, ect, are ever used again. this is still an antinium queen, just not the most powerful one. also, will erin get this queen addicted to the flies?

Erin was making a list.

“Okay, do I have everything? Let’s go over it again. Larder? Stocked. Check! Silverware? Lots of it, even if it’s not silver. Check!”

She turned and bustled over to another table.

“Blue fruit juice? Check. Four full pitchers and a basket of blue fruits.”

She’d stripped several trees in preparation for tonight. At this point, she’d eaten nearly half of the fruit in the orchard. Sooner or later she’d run out of blue fruit, which might be a problem. How long did it take for the trees to grow new fruit? Maybe Pisces would know.

“Acid flies? Check. Dead? Double check.”

It was almost sad how easily she caught them in her floating jar traps. Almost. Erin made sure they’d all exploded before she rolled them onto the grass. She thought the flat fish in the water were helping—they kept bumping into the jars trying to eat the flies. She supposed that they might one day break the thick glass.

“Great. Bathe upstream from the glass jars from now on.”

She should also probably put warning signs up. Who they might be warning Erin had no idea. A certain Human necromancer stayed well away from the glass jars, and she wasn’t sure if Goblins could read. Either way, her list continued.

“Pasta? Wait, I don’t need any pasta.”

Unless Relc dropped by. But from what the Drake told her, he didn’t like Antinium besides Klbkch so that was an outside chance. Erin put a pot on the stove anyways. She could always eat it.

The lovely thing about being near a city was that you didn’t have to make your own pasta. Instead, you could just buy it from an odd Gnoll-lady who knew exactly when you were on your period. In other words, there were advantages and disadvantages to living near a city.

“Okay. That’s about it. I’ve got bread in case Pisces comes by, and I even have cheese. Lovely, smelly cheese. Possibly from cows. And I just bet Klbkch is lactose intolerant too.”

Her larder was fully stocked, her plates and cups were clean, and she’d even gotten out the chess board and set it up. She thought Klbkch might be up for a game or two—that was if she wasn’t busy feeding flies to her customers.

For a moment Erin had to put her head against a wall and wonder how she’d gotten to this point in her life. A girl from Michigan should not think it was normal to sell dead fly torsos to walking ant-people for silver coins. She was also probably ripping them off, but Klbkch seemed willing to pay whatever it took for the flies. He’d eaten six bowls before he’d walked out.

Now all Erin had to do was wait until Klbkch came by with his promised friends. He said they’d come by as soon as they finished with their work. Were they all guardsmen? Erin had forgotten to ask.

Someone knocked on the inn’s door. Erin turned and opened the door with a big smile.

smiles are good. also no, antinium are just allergic to gluten, not lactose

“Hi Klb—oh.”

The group of Goblins all took a nervous step back as Erin stared down at them. The eight—no, nine of them clustered together and shoved at their leader, a small Goblin wearing rags. Erin remembered.

“It’s—it’s you. Do you um, want something?”

The ragged Goblin awkwardly thrust out a hand at Erin. She blinked down at the pile of dirty copper and silver coins in the small palm.

“Oh. Oh! You want to eat, right?”

The Goblin nodded stiffly. Erin opened the door and gestured inside.

“Right then, come in.”

The ragged Goblin hesitated. It thrust the coins at her.

“Um. The first meal is free.”

The Goblin Erin had decided to name Rags looked blankly at her. Apparently ‘free’ wasn’t too easy to understand to a race that took what they wanted. Everything was free, or nothing was free.

“How about I take the money and I’ll feed you until it runs out, okay?”

Again, Erin received a blank look but Rags seemed relieved when she took the money. Erin gingerly put the filthy pile of coins on the inn’s bar counter and wished she had hot water to go with the soap.

“Okay. Right. This isn’t the best time, but why don’t you have a seat over here with your friends?”

The Goblins meekly wandered over to the table Erin was pointing at and sat down. She hesitated. What next?

“Right, food.”

All eight heads shot up and the Goblins stared at Erin. The one she’d fed before was already drooling onto the table.

“Give me five—ten minutes and I’ll have all you can eat. I just need to put on another pot. And make some soup. But I’ve got bread!”

Erin turned. Okay, she’d stuff their faces quick. She dashed into the kitchen and reemerged with a loaf of fresh bread she’d brought and some cheese and sausage. The Goblins stared hungrily as Erin began dumping plates in front of them. They flinched back from her, though, and when she handed them a fork they ducked down as if they thought she were going to stab them with it.

“You can eat this while I get more food, okay?”

The Goblins stared at the food. Rags cautiously reached for the bread, and Erin smacked her head. All the Goblins flinched as one.

“Oh, duh. Sorry about that. I’ll slice it up for you.”

Confused, the Goblins watched Erin dart into the kitchen again. They eyed the wonderful-smelling bread, meat and strange yellow thing, and wondered if they could eat it. Then they looked up and screamed as Erin walked back into the room with a kitchen knife.

“Oh no, don’t run! I’m not going to hurt you!”

Erin waved her hands frantically and nearly poked herself with the knife. The Goblins halted in their mad rush out the door.

“I’m just going to cut this food for you. See?”

She slowly and carefully went over to the food and sliced it up into smaller pieces. Erin smiled at the Goblins as they suspiciously moved back to the table.

“And now I’ll put the knife away. No more pointy thing. You don’t have to worry; you’ll be safe here. Okay?”

She gave them another reassuring smile. That was the precise moment when a group of Antinium entered the inn, followed closely by Klbkch. Erin’s smile froze on her lips.

awkward moment. also this goblin is important

Klbkch froze too and the other tall, identical brown and black insects behind him instantly halted in their tracks. The Goblins were petrified in their seats, but half immediately began edging towards the nearest window.

Erin waved frantically at Klbkch. Then she turned towards the Goblins and gave them another reassuring smile.

“Don’t worry! Don’t worry. These people aren’t here to hurt you. They’re guests. They’re going to eat too, understand?”

They hesitated, but Rags seemed to be made of sterner stuff than her larger comrades. She returned to her seat. And it was a she, Erin was sure of it. The other Goblins—all but one of whom were boys—didn’t wear anything on their upper torso. They barely wore anything to cover their privates.

She shepherded them back to their seats and tried not to look at Goblin nether regions as their loincloths shifted in unfortunate ways. There was a reason pants were invented.

“Go ahead and eat as much as you want.”

Again, the Goblins glanced nervously at the Antinium, but now the initial scare was over, the fresh food called to them. There was a moment’s hesitation, then Rags grabbed a piece of sausage and the Goblins began gobbling all the food on the table with their hands.

She winced at the mess, but at least they were occupied. Erin edged back to Klbkch, who was still waiting with his group of Antinium.

“Hi, Klbkch. Sorry about the confusion. I had a few visitors pop by unexpectedly.”

“There is no problem, Miss Solstice. I have brought others of my kind as you requested.”

Klbkch nodded to Erin and gestured to the silent Antinium behind him. Erin eyed her new guests somewhat apprehensively.

They were like Klbkch, and not like him at the same time. They were like each other though. Erin couldn’t tell one from the other, and all twelve of these other Antinium stood and moved like one unit.

She noticed that they were a bit slimmer than Klbkch, and shorter too. The color of their…carapace was distinctly browner, and they had shorter antennae. And they also seemed disinclined to talk. Each one of the Antinium stared at Klbkch rather than look at Erin.

“Are they—are they your friends? Or other guardsmen?”

Klbkch shook his head.

“I am afraid you are under a misapprehension. These are Workers, Miss Solstice. They are not fellow guardsmen – rather, they perform tasks within the Antinium section of the city. I took them because you wished for more customers, but I have not interacted with them before.”

“Oh.”

“They will behave themselves under my supervision, Miss Solstice.”

Klbkch hurried to assure Erin. He turned towards the standing group of Worker Antinium and pointed to one of the tables.

“You have entered an inn. The polite protocol is to introduce oneself and then take a seat. I will handle your greetings. Move to those tables.”

They obediently walked over to each table. At first they all crowded around one, but Klbkch impatiently directed them so the Antinium stood four to a table.

“Sit!”

Klbkch snapped at the other Antinium. They instantly sat in the chairs. Erin’s smile slipped even further as Klbkch began ordering them about with curt, clipped commands.

He treated the other Antinium like—well, like sheep. Or…like children. Idiotic children you couldn’t trust to pick up a fork without stabbing themselves in the eye. Yes, that was it.

Erin watched Klbkch out of the corner of her eyes as he lectured the other ‘Workers’. He was telling them how to use a spoon. And how to drink from a cup. And how to request another bowl of flies.

“Um, thanks Klbkch. Did you want me to get the food now? I’ve got the acid flies of course, but I also have pasta—”

Erin’s eyes widened.

“Oh no! The pasta!”

The Goblins and Antinium watched as Erin dashed into the kitchen to salvage the over boiled noodles. She came out a few minutes later holding plates of pasta with chopped bits of sausage and onion which she placed in front of the Goblins.

“Use forks. Got it? Your friend here knows how to use forks.”

Erin pointed at the silverware and then started bringing out bowl after bowl of the acid flies she’d prepared. She set them down in front of the Antinium Workers awkwardly. They moved out of her way, but didn’t say anything.

That was, until Klbkch snapped at them, and then all twelve murmured ‘thank you’ every time Erin brought out a plate and cups. Awkward? Erin was redefining the word for herself at the moment.

That done, the Antinium finally began to eat on Klbkch’s command. At least there they appeared to be somewhat enthusiastic, because they began gobbling the acid flies down with commendable speed. They ate in silence, though, which was also unnerving. But at least they were eating.

Erin breathed a sigh of relief. And the door to the inn swung open.

A familiar Drake poked his head into the room. He immediately launched into what sounded like a prepared speech as he awkwardly held a chess set in front of him.

“Good evening, Miss Erin Solstice! I hope you don’t mind me dropping by, but I was wondering if you’d like to play a game of ch—”

Olesm paused and stared around the silent room. His jaw dropped as he saw the Goblins. When he saw Klbkch and the other Antinium it dropped further. He slowly put one clawed hand on the door.

“…Is this a bad time?”

olesm, i dont think is a bad time, but its certainly a weird time

Erin had gone to funerals. Well, she’d attended a funeral. And while they were solemn, sad occasions, she could rightly say that she’d visited funerals that were noisier than her inn at the moment.

At least funerals had coughing people, the occasional sniffling, fidgeting children, and crying babies. In the Wandering Inn, all Erin could hear was the mastication of Goblins as they gobbled their food or the quiet cracking as the Antinium chewed down their acid flies and clicked their mandibles together.

Chomp. Chomp. Chomp.

Erin stared from the Antinium to the Goblins with a desperately cheerful smile plastered on her face. Neither side looked at the other directly, but she had the distinct impression they were silently sizing each other up. The Goblins to run away, the Antinium…well, they were just looking.

The atmosphere was so tense you could—well, Erin was pretty sure pulling a knife out would be a disaster. The Goblins were nervously eying the Antinium, and the Antinium were frighteningly silent and uniform. They ate and moved in almost perfect synchronization.

Erin circulated the room, pitcher of fruit juice in hand. She filled cups, took away plates and filled them with food, and instructed Goblins not to pick their noses. It felt like being a waitress for an entire restaurant by herself, but Erin was up to the challenge. At least, she hoped she was.

She wasn’t taking orders or cleaning up plates yet. All she was really doing was making sure there was food in front of her guests. The Goblins were easy. They ate anything she put in front of them. But the Workers? They were hard. Erin had to make sure none of them had empty bowls or cups, or they’d just stop eating. They didn’t even ask for refills by themselves.

In a lull between serving, Erin stopped in front of Klbkch and Olesm’s table. The two were talking quietly together, which made them exceptionally noisy in the dead silence.

“How’re you two boys doing?”

Both Olesm and Klbkch looked at each other to make sure they were the ones Erin was talking to. Olesm gave her a weak smile.

“I’m quite well, Miss Solstice. Or—may I call you Erin?”

“Please. I’m getting sick of being called Miss Solstice. I feel like my mom.”

“Apologies.”

Klbkch bowed his head which made Erin feel guilty. She changed the subject fast.

“Are you two enjoying your meal? Anything I can get you?”

“Another glass of the blue juice perhaps?”

Olesm raised his glass and Erin topped it off. He smiled at her.

“It is quite tasty.”

“Thanks.”

They both paused awkwardly. Olesm glanced around the inn and fidgeted.

“Do you—do you always serve Goblins in your inn? I saw the sign, but I must admit, this is the first time I’ve ever seen a Goblin not trying to stab someone or running away.”

As one, the Goblins stopped eating and stared over at Olesm. He flinched.

“Um, no. They’re new here too.”

“Oh, I see.”

More silence. Erin glanced down at the table. The Drake Tactician had brought along his chess board, and although he’d set it aside for the food, she saw him glancing at it now and then.

“How about a game of chess? Anyone want to play?”

Klbkch and Olesm looked up.

“Oh, I would love to play—”

Olesm caught himself. He glanced around guiltily at the other diners.

“But I wouldn’t want to take you away from your work. Perhaps another time.”

He looked so downcast Erin wanted to pat him on the head. She thought for a second and then smiled.

“Oh, don’t worry. We can still make it work. I’ll play you and serve food.”

Both Klbkch and Olesm eyed her incredulously. Erin grinned.

“I don’t suppose either of you are familiar with chess notation?”

you think human funerals are solemn? try a funeral for an immortal.

“Okay, so you’ve moved your pawn up two spots. That’s E4, so just tell me you’re moving a pawn to E4, got it? And when I want to move, I’ll let you know by saying, oh, pawn to D5.”

Olesm nodded and glanced down at the chess board. He carefully moved the black pawn up two spots and looked up at Erin. She nodded.

“Got it?”

“I believe so, Erin.”

“Right. Let’s play!”

Erin spun away from Olesm and grabbed a cup and filled it. Across the room, Klbkch and Olesm bent over the chess board and conferred. Olesm moved a piece.

“Pawn, ah, pawn to F3, Erin.”

“Got it! Knight to C6!”

Erin concentrated on the game as she walked around the inn. She wasn’t conscious of how the Goblins slowed in their eating and the Antinium Workers paused from their meal to follow her around the room. Erin’s thoughts focused, and as she mechanically took plates and filled them with food her mind focused on only one thing.

The game. Some called golf the greatest game ever played. They might be right. But Erin loved chess.

She could even play it in her head.

yay chess notation!

“Bishop to D6.”

“Hm. In that case I’ll move…um, I believe that’s pawn to D4.”

“Queen to H4! Check!”

Erin said it instantly and grinned to herself. She heard Olesm groan in dismay.

“Ah. Then—then pawn to G3?”

Again, Erin replied almost before he’d finished speaking.

“Bishop takes pawn at G3!”

“Pawn takes bishop at G3.”

“And I’ll take your rook at H1.”

Erin grinned to herself as Olesm hissed in distress. In her mind’s eye she saw her queen piece sitting in the corner of Olesm’s side of the board, nestling right up against all of his lovely, undefended pieces.

The game continued, but only as mop-up. Erin happily munched away at Olesm’s pieces with her queen. He eventually managed to take hers out with his own, but only after he’d lost another knight and a bishop. By then Erin had more pieces than he did on the board and in better positions, too.

“I concede.”

Olesm tipped over his king and stared despondently at the board. Erin paused serving sliced up sausage to the Goblins long enough to see Klbkch pat Olesm on the shoulder consolingly.

“It was a good game.”

The Drake shook his head.

“You do me too much credit. I made several errors that cost me many pieces. But I believe you had me from the start. Would you do the kindness of showing me where I made mistakes?”

“Of course.”

Erin walked over to the table. She rearranged the board until it was back to normal and then moved Olesm’s pawn up two spaces.

“You started out with a classic: the King’s Pawn Opening. That was a good move.”

Olesm looked blankly down at the board.

“I just moved my pawn to E4. Was that truly a noteworthy move, to have a strategy named after it?”

Erin nodded happily.

“Oh, it’s a classic. Did you know almost a quarter of all chess games start with it? It’s great for taking the center spaces, but unfortunately for you I love playing against that move.”

Klbkch raised one hand.

“Do you mean to say that there are established counters to this opening?”

She nodded and pushed a black pawn forwards.

“Oh, there are lots of good strategies. I countered with an old favorite—the Sicilian Defense. It’s great against the King’s Pawn, but you made a mistake when you moved that pawn up to F3. It doesn’t open up your side for many pieces to get out, and you really want a knight to put pressure on my side of the board. Of course, you could try to take my pawn, but that leaves your center open. Most players try to push forwards aggressively but that’s why the Sicilian Defense works so well since it means you have to lose a pawn if you want to push into the other side.”

Erin paused and looked around the inn. Olesm was wearing a half-glazed, half-delighted expression on his face. The Goblins and all the Antinium including Klbkch were staring at her open-mouthed.

“Uh, sorry. I tend to lecture when I get too into chess.”

“No—don’t worry in the slightest Miss Erin.”

Olesm shook his head and smiled at her. His eyes were alive with interest and she noticed his tail wagging like a dog on the ground.

drake tails can tell you a lot about them and their emotional state

“You have such a deep understanding of this game! How is it that you know so much about chess? I only heard about it last year, yet you say there are strategies already in place?”

“Yes?”

Erin crossed her fingers as Olesm sighed happily. She really hoped she wouldn’t have to explain being from another world. Erin glanced at Klbkch and wondered if she should play him next. Then she looked at Olesm and Klbkch together and had an idea.

She grinned wickedly.

“Yeah, I love playing chess. In fact, I’ll play both of you at the same time, if you want.”

Olesm and Klbkch shared a glance. Both frowned slightly. Well, Olesm frowned and Erin had the distinct impression that Klbkch was frowning.

“Aren’t you taking us a bit too lightly, Erin?”

She blinked innocently at Olesm.

“Me? Of course not. But I bet I can play both of you while serving drinks and food and win against at least one. Want to test my theory?”

They did. Erin grinned to herself as both Olesm and Klbkch set up their pieces on opposite sides of the room. Each player stared intently at their board. She could practically feel the intensity coming off of each. It reminded her of the adults she used to play as a kid. No one liked being trash-talked by a middle schooler. It was hard for her to keep a straight face.

Klbkch moved first. Erin stared at his board and then decided to move a piece on Olesm’s board while she thought. She circulated the room, filling up the glasses with what little fruit juice she had left. When Olesm made his move Erin decided to hit Klbkch with a knight. And then she went back into the kitchen for more pasta. Those Goblins could eat.

The games continued as Erin filled up bowls with the dead flies and handed them out to the Workers. They happily chomped down the flies, but she had the distinct impression they were watching as she travelled back and forth between Klbkch and Olesm’s boards.

Occasionally, Erin would wait while one of the other two players moved a piece, but when she did move from board to board, she attacked fast, seemingly without pausing to think. She could see Klbkch and Olesm watching her as much as the board, but she effortlessly continued playing both players while serving her guests.

Her audience watched the dual games intently. Erin kept an eye on them as well, and saw both Rags and the Antinium Workers staring hard at Klbkch and Olesm’s pieces. The Goblin’s eyes narrowed and the Antinium appeared confused. Erin smiled to herself, but kept sweeping around the room, refilling cups, and swiftly moving pieces on each board.

Eventually, the game ended with a win for Klbkch and a loss for Olesm.

“Congratulations, Klbkch. And to you, Erin.”

“Indeed. I am quite impressed by your ability.”

Erin smiled at both players and tried not to laugh.

“Yeah, it was a good game. Too bad I wasn’t playing either of you.”

“What?”

She pointed down to the chess board in front of Olesm. His King was cornered by a queen and a bishop.

“Notice anything similar about Klbkch’s board, Olesm?”

He looked over. On Klbkch’s side, he’d cornered Erin’s king with a bishop and a queen. In the exact same spots as the pieces on Olesm’s board.

“What is this?”

“I played you two against each other. It’s the oldest trick in the book—I once heard of a guy who tried it against two Grandmasters and failed. I always wanted to do it just once.”

Erin smiled as Klbkch and Olesm exclaimed, and then raised her hands as they immediately demanded another match. She was setting up the boards for a real dual game when something happened.

something?

One of the Workers stood up.

Instantly, Klbkch stopped setting up his pieces and let one of his hands fall down to his side. Erin saw he was holding his sword hilt as he stood up.

oh no this could be bad

“What are you doing, Worker?”

Klbkch’s voice was cold and hostile. The Workers meekly bowed to him.

“This one would watch, Prognugator.”

“Watch?”

Klbkch glanced down at the board and then back to the Worker. He seemed uncertain.

“It is impolite to intrude or impede the innkeeper’s path.”

Erin hastily interposed herself between Klbkch and the meek Worker who was already retreating back to his seat. She beckoned him over.

“It doesn’t bother me, Klbkch. Let him watch. An audience for a chess game is great.”

Klbkch hesitated.

“I would not wish to impose on your hospitality or patience—”

“Impose away, by all means!”

Erin rode over his protests and pulled up another chair. She steered the Worker over to the chair without touching him and made him sit down. Then she noticed the other Workers and Goblins were staring at the chess boards too.

“Come on over if you want to watch, all of you.”

Instantly, there was a crowd surrounding both chess boards. Olesm and Klbkch blinked at the spectators, but Erin smiled happily.

“Okay, now let’s do this so it’ll be fun for me and you. I’ll play you both, but we only get five—okay, ten seconds for each move.”

“Is this another way of playing chess?”

“It’s how some games are played, yeah. This style is called Lightning Chess, but in tournaments you can have anywhere from an hour’s time in total to think of all your moves to only three minutes. If we had a clock we could—never mind, I’ll explain it as we play, okay?”

Klbkch and Olesm nodded. Erin took a chair and placed it between both tables so she could reach both chess boards.

“I’ll have to sit down for this. I’m no Grandmaster.”

good thing that didnt escalate also yes, erin is a chess fanatic

The first two rounds of games Erin won handily. But in the third game Olesm scored a draw.

“Congratulations Olesm.”

Erin covered a yawn and massaged at her back. She gave the elated Drake a weary smile.

“Yeah, that was a great game!”

“Why, thank you.”

Olesm’s scales turned a light shade of red as he shook Klbkch’s hand. His tail thrashed around wildly on the floor, but Klbkch and Erin pretended not to notice.

“I must say, it’s quite amazing—I feel relieved to have finally tied a match against you, Erin. I was beginning to think it was impossible.”

She blushed and waved a hand at him. It felt extremely embarrassing to be treated like some kind of chess genius, especially since she knew she wasn’t. Erin was about to suggest a rematch with different rules when she looked over at the watching Worker Antinium.

“Do you want to play?”

The Antinium she was addressing sat up in his seat and bowed to her.

“This unworthy one would not presume to act in such a way.”

Erin frowned. Did that mean he wanted to play but he was afraid to?

“Why not give it a shot? I’ll teach you how to play, and we can always make more chess boards. All we need is a few pieces of paper and a pen.”

She went into the kitchen and pulled out a few pieces of paper and a quill and ink. It had made her feel like a wizard when she’d first bought the quill, and then she’d wished for a computer and a printer five seconds after she’d had to actually dip the quill every few words when she wrote.

As her guests watched, Erin drew a rough chess board on a piece of parchment, and then tore up other pieces. She carefully drew symbols on them to show which were pawns and which were other pieces, and put the makeshift chess board on the table. She put two of the Antinium Workers in chairs, facing each other across the board.

It was the most low-key chess board Erin had ever seen, but the Antinium stared at the scraps of paper with total concentration.

“Okay, so how much did you guys see when I played chess with Klbkch and Olesm? Do you know how to set up the board?”

Instantly both Antinium moved. Erin recoiled for a second, but they merely rearranged the pieces on the chess board with mechanical precision. In seconds each side was set up. Erin blinked at them.

“Good. Good. And uh, show me how this piece moves?”

Obediently, the Antinium Worker moved the piece forwards.

“And can you move it from left to right?”

“This one does not believe so.”

Klbkch hovered over the board. As always he had few features Erin could read, but he appeared distressed for some reason.

“Address her by her title.”

The Antinium instantly bowed his head at Erin.

“Apologies, Innkeeper Solstice. This one does not believe the pawn piece moves left and right.”

Erin gave Klbkch a half annoyed glance, but turned back to the Worker.

“Right, that’s true! Very good. And show me how it takes a piece?”

He showed her.

“Good. But did you know there’s one more move the pawn can do?”

Instantly, the other Antinium and the Goblins watching the game were filled with attention. They stared as Erin showed them how to take a piece en passant and explained the unique rules around that action. The Antinium she was coaching immediately bowed its head to her.

“This one was unaware of this fact. This one apologizes to Innkeeper Solstice for its failure.”

“What? Don’t apologize. Not many players know about that move. How could you? Now, let’s have you play a game with your friend.”

Erin stepped back as the two Antinium Workers stared at each other in silence. For a moment she was afraid they’d do nothing, but then the first Worker moved his pawn up to E5. After a moment the other Workers replied with the Sicilian Defense, and then the game was on.

Piece after piece moved with minimal pausing in between. At first Erin was afraid they were recreating her games with Klbkch and Olesm, but the two players were playing their own game. It took her a while to realize they were still playing by Lightning rules. Once she’d explained they could take their time, the game slowed.

Erin stared at the two Workers playing each other in complete silence and then looked around at her audience.

“Anyone else want to play?”

the antinium have chess! this could be interesting

Silence. It was the sound of funerals, and churches, except that it wasn’t. Rather, it was the sound you thought should be in such places, but really was more like an ideal goal than the truth.

It was the sound of chess tournaments, though. Erin circulated around the inn, filling plates with dead flies and pouring water (she’d run out of blue juice) and felt like she was home as she listened to the click of chess pieces moving, or, more often, the shuffling of dry paper.

“Oh. How’s the game going? Anyone want more flies? How about pasta? A cup of jui—water?”

Erin passed by each board and watched as Antinium and even Goblins played each other. There were eight boards set up, and the players rotated with each other once someone lost.

Her natural instincts as a chess player warred with her desire to give the new players advice. She compromised by letting Olesm and Klbkch offer commentary, and then dissected games after they’d been played out by recreating them and pointing out good or bad moves.

The Antinium Workers watched Erin’s every move and listened to her words with frightening attention. She’d heard the word ‘rapt’ used to describe people, but never had she met a group so completely focused as the Workers. It was frankly unnerving, but her love of explaining chess moves and strategies more than made up for the awkwardness.

That was one thing. But what really amazed Erin and even Olesm and Klbkch were the Goblins. They were playing chess.

Okay, not well, and not quickly, but the Goblins were sitting down and giving each other spirited, if not particularly well thought out games. The exception was the smallest Goblin, Rags, who had actually beaten two of the Antinium Workers back-to-back.

Erin stopped in front of one of the real chess boards as Rags slid into the seat opposite. It was technically Klbkch’s turn to play, but the Goblin stared at her. It was an obvious challenge.

“I’ll play you, if you want. You’re white, so go ahead.”

Rags eyed Erin defiantly and moved her knight first. Erin hid a smile.

“Oh, the Baltic Opening, huh? Well…”

She moved a pawn two squares up directly in front of the knight. It was her favorite way to deal with that opening move. Rags frowned, and then moved another piece. And then another. For a while the Goblin looked like a strange, green kid playing chess. That was, until she opened her mouth and Erin saw the sharp teeth. But Rags still looked a lot less threatening than before.

Erin crushed her while she served the last of her pasta to the Goblins and had a bite to eat herself.

and now the goblin has chess!

The Goblin challenged her three more times while Erin played Olesm and then two of the Workers. Each time she handily lost, but Erin was impressed by the way the small Goblin was willing to try new strategies. She said so.

“You guys could learn a lot from her. Most of these moves are actually established patterns. Okay, moving the rook right away wasn’t a good choice, but you’re better than most beginners.”

She smiled at Rags. The Goblin fidgeted in her chair and looked away.

Klbkch nodded, and Olesm expressed an interest playing the Goblin. Erin looked over at the Workers. They were eying her surreptitiously. She had the impression they wanted to play her too.

She clapped her hands together and smiled.

“Now then. Anyone else want to play another game?”

yay the goblin is smart!

“And that’s checkmate.”

Olesm looked up from his king and shook his head despairingly.

“Another fine game, Erin. I wasn’t aware of your trap until you moved your bishop up.”

Erin yawned and grinned sleepily at him. Around her the Goblins sat or lay on the tables, sleepily watching the game.

“You keep giving away too many pawns. They’re more valuable than you think.”

Olesm bowed his head and nearly toppled over. He jerked upright and nodded at her.

“I shall keep it in mind, Erin.”

She nodded and yawned again.

“Anyone want to play another game? Klbkch?”

The ant man shook his head. He glanced towards the door, and at the Workers still playing chess. They were still intensely staring at the paper chess boards without any sign of fatigue.

“It is late. I am afraid we must take our leave, Miss—Erin. If I may address you in that way.”

Erin blinked at Klbkch and then looked out the window.

“Oh, of course you can call me that, Klbkch. And wow, it is late!”

She stood up. Immediately, the Workers stopped playing chess and stood too. They bowed to her.

“Allow me to thank you and pay you in their place, Erin.”

Klbkch handed her a bag of silver and gold coins. Erin blinked down at it.

“Oh. That’s a lot.”

“It is only fair payment for what we have consumed. And, might I trouble you to ask for a container of acid flies? I wish to bring some back to Liscor.”

“What? Oh, sure. I’ve actually got a huge glass jar. Do you want it?”

“Please.”

Erin ended up giving Klbkch a huge jar full of acid flies for a gold coin. She felt guilty about it, but the Antinium insisted it was a fair price. He left with Olesm and the Workers in tow, and Erin saw the Goblins off as they slowly streamed out of her inn.

“Come again! I’ll feed you lot another meal if you come by. You don’t need to pay – you paid me enough this time. Okay?”

The Goblins grunted or waved their hands awkwardly at her. They clutched the paper chess board and pieces to themselves silently. Erin had wanted to give them to the Antinium Workers as well, but Klbkch told her it wasn’t a good idea.

The last Goblin, Rags, paused as she walked by Erin. The small Goblin held her hands tightly at her side.

“Hey.”

Erin tapped Rags on the head. She held out her hand. Silently, the small Goblin handed her the pawn back as the other Goblins glared at her.

“No stealing. Besides, a chess board isn’t complete without all the pieces.”

Rag’s eyes lit up. Erin narrowed hers.

“That doesn’t mean you can steal them either. If you want to play a game, come back any time. Okay?”

For a while the little Goblin hesitated, and then nodded. Erin smiled.

“Have a good night.”

She closed the door. Then she bolted it, and made sure all the windows were fastened tight. She didn’t mind the small Goblin, but she was damned if she was going to let it walk off with her chess set.

curse you goblin kleptomaniacs!

“Um, Senior Guardsman Klbkch? May I have a word?”

Klbkch paused as he walked swiftly back to Liscor. He was setting a fast pace, and Olesm was struggling to keep up.

“My apologies, Olesm Swifttail. I had forgotten you were with us.”

“No, it’s nothing.”

Olesm gasped and wheezed as Klbkch slowed. The Workers behind him silently adjusted their pace to give the two room.

“I just wanted to talk to you—if I may.”

“Certainly. May I ask if you are addressing your comment to the liaison of the Antinium or Senior Guardsmen Klbkch?”

“Both, I believe. Um, how shall I put this?”

Olesm paused as the two strode through the night. Klbkch waited patiently until the Drake began.

“As the [Tactician] who liaisons with the council and other guilds and the guard, I am privy to some confidential information. I am uh, aware of the situation with the Workers within the Antinium.”

“Indeed?”

Olesm glanced nervously behind him at the Workers. They silently stared back at him.

“Will—will this be a problem, do you think?”

Klbkch hesitated. He looked back and the Workers instantly looked down at the ground.

“We shall see. They will be observed as usual and I will personally supervise them.”

“Ah, good, good. I wouldn’t ask, but I know that these kind of things have uh, dire consequences. This isn’t an Expedition, but—”

“I understand your concerns. If it helps, I will address this topic in my monthly report to inform you of any significant changes.”

“Thank you.”

“I trust you have enjoyed yourself tonight?”

“Oh, yes. Very. Erin—that is, Miss Erin Solstice is quite a remarkable Human, isn’t she?”

“Indeed.”

“Quite remarkable.”

“Her mastery of the game of chess may be unmatched within the continent.”

“Absolutely.”

“Indeed.”

“…Would you like to play a game after this, by any chance?”

“It would be my pleasure.”

erin is having affects on her guests

That night Erin slept well. She did not wake up to hear a strange voice telling her she’d achieved [Tactician Level 1!]. She did not level up that night. Several Antinium and one Goblin however—

Did.

this is significant!

thats the end of the chapter! will any of these antinium go insane? will the goblin use her newfound class to take over her tribe? will olesm try something?

see you next post

#chrono

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2019dclmed · 5 years

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Monte Carlo/Monaco - Thursday, May 30, 2019

It was another 6:01am alarm for us with the PA call time of 7:30am. UGH.

We were technically anchored at Villefranche, a central point for Nice, Cannes, Eze, & Monte Carlo/Monaco. I say anchored instead of docked, as this was our sole port that required tendering.

Our PA for this port is the one we questioned the most, and it was the only one we did that was just a half-day.

Monaco, The Marina and The Little Train (V01)

Due to the “little train” portion of our PA, as expected, we had a large group with a handful of pretty young kids. In fact, I think they split our PA into 2 or 3 different groups, each filling an entire charter bus. I think there were actually about 30 in our group after tendering, which took longer than expected.

Our guide was a nice British bloke, Paul. I think it was 8:15am by the time we pulled out. The port is at - and the busses travel through - a castle to exit; the tight turns required maneuvering by a charter bus that I didn’t believe was possible! Phew!

Kara: I love the water, but our only other experience with tendering was in the Caribbean, which is a bit unnerving. As we made our way out to the tender, I leaned back to G and said, “This isn’t your grandma’s tender boat.” They attached an entire ramped dock system to the side of the ship and our tender boat was a nice size touring ferry. Very, very easy. We also managed to get a couple of great shots of the ship while on the tender.

Also as expected, we drove around curvy roads and tunnels to get to Monte Carlo. They said there is one police officer for every 60 people in Monte Carlo, which totals 38,000 residents. (That’s over 600 police!) Honestly, you would need it for all of the overt wealth apparent everywhere you look. Overall, it was beautiful, clean, and the one word I’d use to describe it is “Opulent.”

Of course our guide educated us about Princess Grace and Prince Rainier along with their children, the filming of 2 Bond films, and homes of U2 and Elton John. The Cannes Film Festival had been held just a few weeks prior. We walked through (quite quickly) the Cathedral. It reminded me of a much smaller version of a mix of both Westminster Abbey and St. Paul’s Cathedral in London, as it had aspects of both “dark and light”. Somehow the combination worked beautifully here.

We were given only about 10 minutes to browse around a few tourist shops, so it was no useful time at all.

Then we took our 30 minute Little Train Tour, which had a good auto-audio guide. During the tour we witnessed the holistic dismantling of the Grand Prix circuit. Just the week prior the 90th running of the Monaco Grand Prix was held. We got to drive down the starting line and saw (didn’t drive on) the (to me) famous Tony Stark curve from “Iron Man 2”.

Sidenote: The above statement is the main reason I chose a Monaco PA. Between my love of fast cars, Iron Man, and Disney-Pixar’s Cars 2, I really wanted to ��be here”. My thoughts really changed weeks earlier, as (not being overdramatic) I was traumatized by what they did to Tony Stark in “Avengers: Endgame”. (I doubt I will ever be able to watch this movie again.) Thus, my experience was sadness rather than excited elation. However, between my Tony Stark/Endgame reflection and a book I was reading at the time, the experience gave me some deeper thoughts on what it means to be driven by fear….

Our tour ended with a beverage at the Marina with spectacular views of the harbor with its multi-million dollar yachts and the (no kidding) yacht-shaped Yacht Club - LOL! Monaco is one of the most beautiful places I’ve ever visited, but with more time, I don’t know what we’d have done other than stroll around and find an overpriced cafe.

Kara: I could spend a few weeks in this general area and not take it all in. Between the museum, the castle, watching the water, going over to Eze and Nice and strolling - easily a few weeks. While there was certainly incredible opulence in Monaco I loved every moment of this tour, well except for one thing which you’ll read about in a moment.

We took a scenic route back through Eze - & inexplicably, Nice! In fact, we got stuck in traffic, not getting back to the ship until 1:15pm. (By the PA description we were supposed to be back by noon at the latest.) Thus, we could definitely see how people could easily miss the all aboard time in this port!

When we finally did get back everyone was running off the bus, as we had a non-stop screaming infant in our group. He reminded me of Jack-Jack in full-on flame mode. (Kara said the same family was on her Naple/Sorrento tour during which the baby shrieked the entire time then as well. Kara nick-named him Demon Child.)

Kara: I adore kids, especially when they are cute and engaging as this little guy could be. G’s statement is true though - he had some demonic issues with being in a bus and I was OVER it.

This photos on the way back was fun to capture.

We dashed up to Cabanas before it closed at 2pm, since by this point we were starving. We did capture some lovely photos during/after lunch.

Then we escaped (finally) to our stateroom for some much-needed quiet. It was finally sunny and almost warm, so we sat on the verandah (me in a hoodie and jeans with sandals) to read.

Kara - We enjoyed a little table right by the window in Cabanas - it was LOVELY! Then we strolled around on deck enjoying the sunshine. I think Gayle might have been on a different cruise than me at this point because the weather was purely delightful.

Today’s VIP treat from Zoe was cookies - yum! We also stopped by Guest Service to make sure the gratuities were on my folio, as we always dedicate our onboard credit for this.

At 4pm I started to get ready for dinner, as I didn’t want to be late. Tonight we were in Rapunzel’s Royal Table for the second time. Part of the reason I requested this rotation was so we could be in Rapunzel’s Royal Table for the “Lantern Show” on the same night as the “Tangled” stage show. This was perhaps the thing I was MOST excited for on this cruise!

Thus, we were the FIRST people into the restaurant! As our head server indicated earlier in the cruise, we were able to move to an empty table nearby/on the center aisle (the exact location we were at on the Disney Wonder in Tiana’s)! I captured some video and Kara selflessly took pictures of me with Rapunzel and Flynn Rider.

Kara: We started OUTSIDE the restaurant with photos:

The Famous Sea Bass!

Dessert Menu

My dessert came in a mini-cast iron skillet! (It was basically a donut with chocolate sauce & ice cream, which was underwhelming.)

Rapunzel VIDEO https://www.dropbox.com/s/83thkfq30cgwsw1/IMG_1843.MOV?dl=0

Our server challenged us to find the 3 “hidden” Pascals around the restaurant. I found 1; Kara found the other 2. BOOM. (We will not give away the locations here!) Since we were in early and are quick with ordering our meal, we again had time for our server to try to stump us with table/crayon puzzles. (FYI with the “Mickey Mouse” clue we were then able to solve the “4 boxes to 3 by moving 3 crayons. I include this here to recall it in the future!)

After dinner, I spotted Hotel Director Lisa (Zoe’s boss) to share our positive feedback about many aspects of our cruise experience.

Part of tonight’s “Tangled” theme was O’Gills Pub being “taken-over” as the Snuggly Duckling!

Kara taught me rummy, while we simultaneously played and sang “Thugo” (Thug-themed bingo) with the entertainers.

Kara pointed out a great banner that I may (will definitely) duplicate in my office for my university honors students:

We all have dreams. Now go follow yours and get out!

LOL!!!

Kara prompted us to the theatre before the doors opened so I could pick a prime location to view “Tangled”.

I will say the show was...good. (The puppeteer for Max was great and the singer portraying Mother Gothel was INCREDIBLE.) This is tough because the stage shows are simply a performance of the movie. My stance is I can go to my stateroom (or stay home - gasp!) and watch the movie. Disney Cruisers get accustomed to and have a deep appreciation for their original Broadway-style shows - something you can only get on Disney Cruise Line. (I’m looking at you “Disney Dreams”.) And some are only offered on one or two of the four ships at that. So putting the movies on stage seems like a lesser effort on their part. Based on the limited time and facility they really can’t go “full out” like they do with the Broadway tour productions. (FYI they do “Frozen” on the Disney Wonder, something I found to be a painful experience and have no intention of going to ever again.) Still if they have to choose a movie to put on stage, “Tangled” is definitely at the top of my list!

Overall, it was a great night! And even more so since there was no alarm for the next day’s Day at Sea! Back in the stateroom we journaled and enjoyed our regular nightly cookies.

Kara pointed out on this trip we visited the 2 smallest countries: The Vatican and Monaco!

We tried not to go into pre-emptive “sad mode” since tomorrow was the last full day of the cruise. With all the PAs, a 7 night cruise never flew by as fast as this one.

Disclaimer: I (Gayle) am a travel agent with Authorized Disney Travel Planner agency - Off to Neverland Travel. Contact me today for a no-obligation quote!

Next up: Day at Sea!

#2019dclmed #disney cruise #Disney Magic #med #mediterranean

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ar3volut1on · 7 years

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At church tonight the text preached on was Psalms 2 and I have to say it really struck a cord with me. As we worked through it line by line I kept thinking of all that is going on today, and how this Psalm describes equally well those of Jesus time who crucified the one who came to save them and those today who deny him. Well they are just wasting their time really cause we know that even the gates of hell will not prevail for the power of God has torn the veil and in the ends Jesus wins!

Why do the heathen rage, and the people imagine a vain thing? Psalms 2:1

Why do they fight against God, the creator of all things, so very hard? Oh I know they say that following Christ is too hard, too restrictive, too many rules, etc. I’ve herd all the excuses, but have they really stopped to see what it means to follow Him I wonder. See He’s not about rules to follow, restricting us, and all that. No! He wants to free us from the restrictions our sin places on us, the rules we are forced to bow to in our denial of His mercy, rejection of His grace. When we follow Jesus we are changed, transformed and suddenly we see that what we thought were hard rules are really just following in our Shepherd’s footsteps. we keep the commandments because he did, we love and serve others because he did – he lives in us and we are his light in this dark world. We are no longer bound prey and slaves to our sins – those vile addictions we once thought so wonderful; no we see them now for what they really were, chains binding us up, holding us back, slowing sucking the life out of us, killing us and puling us right into the fiery lake.

The kings of the earth set themselves, and the rulers take counsel together, against the LORD, and against his anointed, saying, Let us break their bands asunder, and cast away their cords from us. Psalms 2:2-3

When Jesus was crucified the big shots really thought they had him, the Jewish leaders, the Roman leaders, they all thought they were really doing something. Ole Satan thought he’d finally managed to stop the seed that was supposed to bruise his head. They thought that by killing this Jesus they were thwarting God, they really had no idea though.

He that sitteth in the heavens shall laugh: the Lord shall have them in derision. Psalms 2:4

See they thought they were defying God but really they just played right into his hand. What they meant for evil, God used for good. For the ultimate good, for the salvation of the world. They offered up to God his own perfect Lamb an atonement for sin of all who believe and put their trust in him, and they didn’t even realize it. Instead He just has them in derision all stressed and freaking out when they realize that they just got owned.

God looks down at them and he laughs! I imagine him looking at them like I would one of the toddlers on Sunday who decides they are going to do something I don’t allow for their own good and they come at me pushing, pulling, tugging trying like mad to make me move from the door or let them stand on the rocking horse or whatever wild idea they have in their head at that moment. I’m like a rock, they can’t budge me as I chuckle to myself and keep them safe in spite of themselves. Those who crucified his Son were like my toddlers, railing against something bigger than they are in vain, they can’t overpower the power that created them! He is our rock, our fortress, the creator of heavens and earth; who is man that we should defy him!

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Not only that but God knows that really all they are doing in their supposed rebellion is accomplishing his plan. See he knew Jesus had to be sacrificed from the very beginning, they were just the tools that accomplished that goal and thus brought about the very think they were trying to stop. So God laughs at the irony of their sad, rage, their vanity. For what they meant for evil he used for the ultimate good. As he always does, we may not see the good in a situation at first but God will take what seems terrible and use it to further His kingdom.

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I think he looks on our rebellion today in much the same way. I think he chuckles when we fight so hard with all we have against him because he knows he’s God he created us and he is in charge whether we like it or not. So while we are allowed to rebel and fight against him ultimately he will just flip it and use it for good. Jesus is the ultimate example of this but we can often see it today as well. Look at the story of Jim Elliot for instance – those who killed him thought they were doing something, thought they were in control, but look how God used Jim’s death to reach so many around the world. He used evil for good. I do know that those who killed him thought he was a threat and they were defending themselves but murder is wrong anyway you look at it.

??????????????

Then shall he speak unto them in his wrath, and vex them in his sore displeasure. Psalms 2:5

After he has his laugh over their vain folly then we see Him speak and well he ain’t laughing anymore. Nope now he’s the Father and he’s about to take em to the woodshed for rebelling against him. Cause even though He used their evil for good they are still guilty of defying him. Just like those toddlers are guilty of trying to disobey me and they will get sat in time out once their little hissy fit is over. He speaks to them in his wrath, chastises them, reminds them he is God and well, takes em out the woodshed as we say around here. They are vexed in his displeasure. I don’t wanna vex God or be the cause of his displeasure ever again. I was once and I know that, it is by his mercy that my eyes were opened to the truth and I was able to see how silly, how ridiculous I was. Only then was I able to admit my guilt and sin and seek forgiveness for it, accept the free gift of grace offered by accepting Jesus into my heart.

Yet have I set my king upon my holy hill of Zion. I will declare the decree: the LORD hath said unto me, Thou art my Son; this day have I begotten thee. Ask of me, and I shall give thee the heathen for thine inheritance, and the uttermost parts of the earth for thy possession. Thou shalt break them with a rod of iron; thou shalt dash them in pieces like a potter’s vessel. Psalms 2:6-9

Now we really see why he laughs, cause he knows that Jesus has already won. He’s set his Son whom he loves upon the hill of Zion and no one is gonna move him! Instead he is going to give all that the Son asks into his hand to be judged, dashed like shards of clay. Praise the Lord, I will not be among those shards, I will not be broken with that rod. I am not among the heathen any longer but among the sheep who willing follow their Shepherd.

Be wise now therefore, O ye kings: be instructed, ye judges of the earth. Serve the LORD with fear, and rejoice with trembling. Psalms 2:10-11

Be wise, serve the Lord with fear, with awe, with reverence for He is God Almighty, the Creator of all things, by his power were all things spoken into being. Serve him and rejoice with trembling that you have hope, that you have eternal life with the God who loves you so much he died for you.

Kiss the Son, lest he be angry, and ye perish from the way, when his wrath is kindled but a little. Blessed are all they that put their trust in him. Psalms 2:12

Blessed are all they that put their trust in him, the Son, the King of kings! Enter into his courts and rejoice!

The Power of the King At church tonight the text preached on was Psalms 2 and I have to say it really struck a cord with me.

#David #faith #freedom #God #jesus #king #love #peace #Psalm #rock #sin #wisdom

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theworstbob · 7 years

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i listened to the 100 most popular songs from 2016 today

100) "Perfect," One Direction

I am glad that this list started with a lovely cover of Tay Tay's "Style." I was worried none of these songs would actually be good! Like, this cover isn't anywhere near as good as the Postmodern Jukebox version, but they handled it capably, and it's hard to go wrong with this song. These five nice boys picked a very good song to yap!

99) "See You Again," by Wiz Khalifa ft/Charlie Puth

I honestly can't believe that Fast and Furious is the most reliable institution in America. Think about everything in this country that has failed or is failing us. Think of what is happening in this country, and then think of the few things that are happening which are good. It's Fast and Furious and the DVSBlast Twitter account. Those are the only two things we can trust right now.

98) "Timmy Turner," by Desiigner

So I’m not sure why this song brings up The Fairly Odd Parents, but this is a nightmare to listen to and think about, and I wanna talk some Cosmo. I believe, with my heart and my soul, Cosmo belongs in the Dumb TV Character Pantheon. This feeling exists within me because I will always remember this exchange from one of the movies, after Cosmo is separated from Wanda: Cosmo: I can't date again! I'm terrible at small talk! Ask me about the weather! Timmy: Um, how's the weather? Cosmo: JEFF! Cosmo is such a good character. I am glad for this excuse to talk Cosmo.

97) "Wicked," by Future

So is there a difference between Metro Boomin not trusting you and Metro Boomin being [indifferent to/unaware of] the fact of my existence? I don't think I should be shot simply because Metro Boomin has never met me and thus would have no reason to trust me. I suppose that wouldn't be a good intro to the track. "If Metro Boomin doesn't care to know who you are, you will be permitted to continue living outside his (admittedly limited) purview."

96) "Humble and Kind," by Tim McGraw

Let's take a second to appreciate the irony of the demographic which made this the 96th-most-popular song in America in 2016 is also the exact same demographic which voted for Trump. "Bitterness keeps you from flying/Always stay humble and kind." HEY GUESS WHAT LORI MCKENNA, BITTERNESS DON'T KEEP YOU FROM SHIT. YOU AND TIM DID NOTHING.

95) "Adventure of a Lifetime," by Coldplay

Oh come on why is this like this is no why

94) "Starving," by Hailee Steinfeld and Grey ft./Zedd

Every song Hailee Steinfeld has made would have been a better closing moment for Pitch Perfect 2 than "Flashlight." Again: imagine all the Bellas past and present on stage singing "I didn't know that I was starving 'til I tasted you." And what did Pitch Perfect 2 try to do? It tried to make Jessie J happen, the least noble pursuit possible short of trying to make Robbie Williams happen. They also made Pentatonix Canadian? We don't talk enough about how Pentatonix was randomly Canadian in Pitch Perfect 2. We don't talk enough about how there are two full movies about a capella music and Pentatonix had a total of three seconds of silent screen time.

93) "All in My Head (Flex)," by Fifth Harmony ft./Fetty Wap

Trap Rappers Doing Feature Verses in Pop Songs is already my favorite thing. Like when Kendrick appears in a Maroon 5 song, it's weird because Kendrick made To Pimp a Butterfly, but you can see how Kendrick can fit himself into a pop song, traditional rap serving at its core as a second percussion track. Fetty Wap is on a different plane of existence.

92) "Really Really," by Kevin Gates

I listened to Islah because it showed up on some list somewhere and I remember listening to this song but don't remember anything about it. It took me a few minutes to remember this was a separate entity from Danny Brown's "Really Doe." So I guess I don't mind this, which is enough for this to take provisional second place.

91) "Cut It," by O.T. Genasis ft./Young Dolph

As much money I would have put against the "In Love with the Coco" guy ever having another hit, I would have put even more money against me enjoying it as much as I enjoyed this song. I'm not gonna tell my grandkids about this song or like listen to it again, but it gave me three and a half minutes I mostly enjoyed.

90) "No Limit," by Usher ft./Young Thug

Usher is basically a dorky dad at this point in his career. You kinda knew he was spiraling into the dorky dad phase of his career when he started on The Voice, and his dorky dad status was cemented when he did an American Ninja Warrior course on Ellen (ANW being a healthy conduit for midlife crises), but he does a song with Young Thug, and it is clear that, okay, maybe the man who made "Yeah!" no longer 100% understands what's going on in this crazy world, but he's down to show us he can still party like he used to. Look at him dance! Betcha didn't think your math teacher could move like THAT, huh! Has anyone seen Thugger? Thugger? Thugger, where a -- oh, the -- Young Thug, what are you doing. No, Young Thug, come on. OK. I think we're all funned out. Get in the car. No dessert for you tonight, mister.

89) "Back to Sleep," by Chris Brown

In the interest of perpetuating the notions that protests are effective and that wrongdoers will be punished, I will be continuing my ban on willingly listening to Chris Brown. I'm still listening to "Waves," tho, but I also didn't exactly acquire that album, so I don't feel like I'm breaking rank with that. I understand I listened to a Kevin Gates album, and I will offer a defense of that action just as soon a -- /dashes away/

88) "Watch Me," by Silento

I really wish Billboard would make a rule prohibiting songs from appearing on year-end lists two years in a row. Like, OK, people were listening to this song in 2016, that's OK, but it was released in March 2015! This cannot be one of 2016's 100-most-iconic songs when it was a Song of the Summer contender in 2015!

87) "All the Way Up," by Fat Joe, Remy Ma, and Jay-Z ft./French Montana and Infared

this beat, though. I'd really like to know if that's synth or a real brass, because I can't find any liner notes for this track, and I can't get over the idea of someone picking up saxophone in fifth grade when they needed to start doing extracurricular activities, realizing they loved playing music, working their ass off to become a highly proficient saxophone player, getting to the level where they have turned the saxophone into their career, getting the call to come to the studio to lay down a track with Fat Joe, and then just playing two measures and it's the most popular thing they ever did.

86) "I Know What You Did Last Summer," by Shawn Mendes & Camila Cabello

The girl kinda sounds like Meatwad and the dude kinda sounds like Master Shake. There's a good song somewhere in here but jfc these muppet voices.

85) "Lean On," by Major Lazer & DJ Snake ft./MO

KEEP IT IN 2015. I AM NOT A CRACKPOT.

84) "Hide Away," by Daya

There was a time in my life where I could listen to a song like this and it would be appropriate, and that time was precisely 13 years ago. I think I have to knock on all my neighbor's doors and let them know that I am a 27-year-old who listened to "Hide Away."

83) "When We Were Young," by Adele

So okay I didn't realize I had listened to some dude do this as his The Voice blind audition, and I didn't even look up what this song was because I was ONE HUNDRED PERCENT CERTAIN the dude was singing a Billy Joel song, and now that I know that I heard a cover of an Adele song and thought with absolute certainty that it was a Billy Joel song, I sort of understand why every Adele song leaves me cold.

82) "Pop Style," by Drake ft./The Throne

You know how sometimes, you'll watch some god-awful Dreamworks animated feature that thinks pop culture references count as jokes, and then you get to the end and it gives six different people a "written by" credit? This is why, when I hear a line like "Got so many chains they call me Chaining Tatum," I believe even harder that Drake has a ghostwriter. That line is the sort of painful stupid that only exists when a corporate committee tries to make a joke. Drake is basically if the social media presence of the restaurant Denny's learned how to rap.

81) "On My Mind," by Ellie Goulding

20 deep and we finally found a song I can fully endorse.

80) "Middle," by DJ Snake ft./Bipolar Sunshine

/adjusts glasses /clears throat um maybe turn down for this /bows

79) "Wildest Dreams," by Tay Tay

Man this is 2014 so EXTRA fuck this, but I'd like to say, before we move on from Tay Tay: I think we all know Tay Tay had a rough 2016, or at least as rough a 2016 as anyone could have had while still ending the year being worth tens of millions of dollars. Whenever she releases her follow-up to 1989, it will be overambitious, it will flop, it will be derided, and only overthinking morons like me will stay with it long enough to find its tiny triumphs. But the thing about Tay Tay is, she 100% doesn't need to be a pop star. The second the pop world is done with her, she's going to go back to Nashville, and those hicks will welcome her back with the openest arms imaginable. Her country comeback is already my favorite album of 2019.

78) "Sit Still, Look Pretty," by Daya

BOY AM I EVER NOT THE TARGET DEMO FOR DAYA. THIS FRESH TEEN HAS CORNROWS AND I AM NOT MEANT TO BE AUDIENCE TO HER BRAND OF GIRL POWER.

77) "Side to Side," by Ariana Grande ft./Nicki Minaj

This song gets a lot of goodwill for being the follow-up for the important Ari/Nicki masterwork "Get on Your Knees," and though this is a far inferior work, it does not squander the goodwill built at all.

76) "Lost Boy," by Ruth B

This is easily the second-best sad song with a Peter Pan theme I heard in 2016. Shout-out to Kelsea Ballerini.

75) "Antidote," Travis Scott

One of the things I will miss most about Twitter is the adventures of @dances and Leany, his Travis Scott ad-lib parrot.

74) "Say It," by Tory Lanez

The intro to this music video has two female characters with lines of dialogue, and I don't think I've ever seen a hip-hop music video come closer to passing the Bechdel Test. Anyway this song is nice! It's a lot like that other song I said I enjoyed but wouldn't remember, in that I enjoy it but probably won't remember it by the time I get to the next nice song.

73) "Hymn for the Weekend," by Coldplay

I didn't want to listen to this song, but I told myself I had to for the sake of completionism, and I just, I have so little life's time, and I spent four minutes with a song that I know is bad, that you know is bad, simply to report back to you that this song is, in fact, bad. I don't even have a joke. It's a Coldplay song. What could I possibly have to gain from listening to a Coldplay song in 2017.

72) "Can't Feel My Face," by The Weeknd

I took this excuse to listen to this song again, even if it should stay in 2015, and I learned that they're still making Grammy nominee compilation albums. I still remember, there was one year my mom bought one of those Grammy compilation albums, and I was looking at the track listings, and somehow Bowling for Soup was on it? And I think about Bowling for Soup's Grammy-nominated hit "Girl All the Bad Guys Want" a lot, because it's a potentially problematic song. Like, when you listen to it, it sounds okay enough, it's just a young man recognizing that he's out of his depth with a young woman, recognizing his own flaws and trying to keep up. But then you remember what Bowling for Soup looked like? And the tone of the song is called into question. How can we be sure this song isn't about a young man bleating about how the young woman isn't working hard enough to appreciate him? If you could completely divorce art from artist, "Girl All the Bad Guys Want" would be an undeniable jam, but we cannot, we have to consider that Bowling for Soup left the house every single day thinking looking the way they did was acceptable, and we must consider the persepective from which they saw the song.

71) "Sorry," by Beyonce

One of the funniest things about Serena Williams' extended run of dominance at the top of the WTA is her "rivalry" with Maria Sharapova, because you know Serena is EXTREMELY AWARE that Maria Sharapova makes more from endorsements than she does, and Serena has made it her #1 mission in her tennis career to destroy Maria Sharapova’s credibility every time they meet on a tennis court. I don't think I ever saw Serena Williams play a better tennis match than the final at the 2012 Olympics, like I have no idea how Sharapova didn’t just retire after that match. One of my favorite stats is that Serena Williams lost more matches to Alize Cornet in 2014 than she has to Maria Sharapova in over a decade of head-to-heads. I don't have a comment about "Sorry," y'all know I love this song, I just want to point out the work Beyonce has been doing in getting America to appreciate Serena Williams, and to speculate on who the Maria Sharapova of the extended Beyonce universe is. It's not Tay Tay, Tay Tay is the Angelique Kerber of the EBU (one good year while Beyonce took a few plays off), but who's Beyonce's Sharapova? Katy Perry? They've never been in direct competition, but that might be it.

70) "Luv," by Tory Lanez

This was less nice than his other song.

69) "Down in the DM," by Yo Gotti ft./Nicki Minaj

When asked to summarize 2016 for future generations, I will play them this novelty trap single about sending nudes on Twitter. And then also apologize for the whole Trump thing. I miss snow, too. But "Snapchat me that pussy," tho.

68) "Sucker for Pain," by Lil Wayne, Wiz Khalifa, & Imagine Dragons, w/Logic & Ty Dolla $ign ft./X Ambassadors

That this song is actually coherent is a minor miracle. Honestly, I think you could stack three or four more featued artists on top of this before it really became messy. Also shout out to how apparently the lead singer for Imagine Dragons and the singer for X Ambassadors both have shaved heads and beards. This song didn't do enough to convince me those are two different bands.

67) "Unsteady," by X Ambassadors

My favorite thing in the world for years has been my Imagine Dragons cover band, Imagine Imagine Dragons. No one I have ever told that joke to has thought it was funny, but I only need one laugh.

66) "Close," by Nick Jonas ft./Tove Lo

I AM NOT A CRACKPOT: music videos with stuntwork in them should give the stuntpeople a shout-out in the credits. Stuntpeople should get more respect than they do. Like, the fact there's not even an Oscar for stuntpeople when every single movie is comic book nonsense is a travesty. Anyway this is an okay enough song about hot people who want to make out with each other.

65) "White Iverson," by Post Malone

To everything, no. How dare you.

64) "Die a Happy Man," by Thomas Rhett

I take issue with this guy singing the line "Between the bottle of wine and the look in your eyes and the Marvin Gaye." This dude has probably only listened to one Marvin Gaye song in his life, or at least he thinks he does, because this dude 100% thinks Marvin Gaye sang "Let's Stay Together." This is a song about a man who thinks a girl is hot and wants to have sex with her. Like, that's it. This isn't a love song. This dude is just extremely horny and made a slow jam about it.

63) "Ex's and Oh's," by Elle King

Please, my friends. I know losing this song will be difficult, but join me in pretending we do not walk the same earth as Rob Schneider. We have seen what distorting one's own reality has done for the other team. We will be happier in the shared experience we create for ourselves.

62) "Me Too," by Meghan Trainor

As long as this is what you wanted. As long as you can live knowing you have the power to choose how you live. It didn't have to be like this. But if this is the way you wanted it, then I accept that you have made a decision, and I wish you the best.

61) "In the Night," by The Weeknd

It's kind of amazing that The Weeknd released an album called Kissland and somehow recovered to become a legit star.

60) "Never Be Like You," by Flume ft./Kai

So before, my relationship with the music of Flume was, occasionally, some girl would appear in my "Who to Follow" section on Twitter with a cute avi and the display name "I'm Flume's bitch," and she was recommended because she followed people I knew IRL, and I said, "Hey, I'm like two degrees away from whoever that is." And now that I've bothered to listen to a Flume song, I now understand me and the girl from the Twitter recommendations box never could have been. :/

59) "For Free," by DJ Khaled ft./Drake

I downloaded the Snapchat app, but the first time I used Snapchat, it pointed my camera at me, and I knew immediately this was not an app I was going to use for long. And then I tried to figure out how to use it, and I realized that, by the time I figured out how Snapchat worked, DJ Khaled's Snapchat would have grown stale, so I deleted the app. Anyway here’s Drake, bleating as he ever has.

58) "Starboy," by The Weekend ft./Daft Punk

i mean this is just a fuckin' good song. i'm honestly sorta stunned it's in the middle of this list. i thought it was much bigger. these aren't substantive critical thoughts, but nothing else i've written is, so hey let's keep the party goin'.

57) "2 Phones," by Kevin Gates

This is probably the #1 songs in terms of hooks I have muttered to myself while switching my earbuds from my iPod to my phone after work because I work in a basement with no reception and also live in the year 2004 and need my phone and my music storage device to be two separate entities.

56) "Hands to Myself," by Selena Gomez

On the Wikipedia entry for this song, the "Composition and lyrical interpretation" section is four paragraphs long. This is a song in which a young woman whispers about how nice it is to have sex. The "composition and lyrical interpretation" section describes the song as "a come-hither about finding love through good and bad situations." Come-hither is not a noun. Remember earlier, when I lamented that I couldn't find out who did the instrumentation on "All the Way Up?" This information is available for "Hands to Myself," which is still, if you have forgotten, a young woman whispering about how nice it is to have sex. The song is in the key of E-flat major, yes hahaha major key that's right very good, and the tempo is 111 BPM. You ever just think about how much information is on the Internet, how much of that information is necessary, and how much information we decide to take in anyway?

55) "Oui," by Jeremih

I wasn't focusing on this song because I tried to copy and paste the flat symbol into the WordPad document in which I drafted this but it kept fucking up the formatting, which is an insane thing to think about given that I have to reformat this once I paste the words into tumblr, but I assume I didn't actually need to hear it beyond the immediate need of listening to some tunes for this piece.

54) "679," by Fetty Wap

The great and terrible thing about the absence of Punk Goes Pop compilations is that I think "Trap Queen" would have been an excellent pop/punk cover, but they would've given it to one of the screamo/hardcore bands. I'm still holding out hope for that Punk Goes Broadway comp, tho. Maybe if I write enough letters to State Champs, I can get them to cover "I'm Alive?"

53) "Exchange," by Bryson Tiller

"Next time around, fuck, I want it to be different." I respect this song for using fuck as a resigned interjection mid-song. As someone who describes his general aesthetic as "fuck, dude," I think it's a cool move.

52) "Gold," by Kiiara

Yo I dig this! I like how I could listen to this chorus for a million years and never be able to understand what she's singing. "Gold" by Kiiara! What's in there? I love it!

51) "Into You," by Ariana Grande

sometimes i think about "the way," and like i get why ariana grande is doin' what she's doin' now and i respect her and think she produces jams? but man, there were so many other directions she could have taken her career.

50) "We Don't Talk Anymore," by Charlie Puth ft./Selena Gomez

Two duets on this list so far, and they're both not great, but let's ask a question: what is the best pop/punk duet ever? Your contenders are: 1) "Vicious Love," New Found Glory with Hayley Williams 2) There is no two. I care deeply about pop/punk and find the fact there's only one pop/punk duet of note shameful. Do better. Thank you for allowing me this soapbox.

49) "H.O.L.Y.," by Florida Georgia Line

So we've had two bro country tracks on the list, and I have to think this is the last, and this is a really interesting echo. Chris Stapleton, a really unique artist who dropped a dope traditional-country album called Traveller in 2015, won that year's CMA for Album of the Year, which sent a signal to the world of country music: MORE LIKE THIS, YA YUTZES. So all of a sudden, you have the bro country asshats dropping nonsense like this to prove they're "real" artists, that they're about more than having a good time and oglin' babes, they could be Serious Artists. Except their definition of Serious Artistry is just Make A Ballad, forgetting that Chris Stapleton's "Parachute" is a wrecking ball of a song which still goes hard enough to anchor a truck commercial. (It is an important moment in a white trash boy's life, the first time he recognizes the country song in the truck commercial.) But country consumers aren't discerning, and they are happy to have just the slightest hint of emotional acknowledgement (not depth or complexity, just acknowledgement that, yes, emotions can exist, and are often even felt!), especially when paired with religious overtones. The two longest passages in this piece of shit so far have been me complaining about bro country, and I don't even care, bro country still needs to be stopped.

48) "Don't Mind," by Kent Jones

wow okay, that's a candid camera reference in 2016, i expected this song to be bad for a lot of reasons, but i didn't expect one of those reasons to be dated cultural references. y'all didn't you hear the song about using twitter to fuck? you can't honestly be on your candid camera game.

47) "Let Me Love You," by DJ Snake ft./Justin Bieber

I enjoyed that! Good job, everyone! Y'all crafted a nice 210 seconds, and I think this is the most accurately-placed song on the list! This was definitely the 47th-best pop song of the year.

46) "Never Forget You," by Zara Larsson, MNEK

So like the deeper I get into this list, the more I appreciate the seven minutes I spent with Daya, because OK that's clearly not for me? But at least her songs had a character which I could define as Not For Me. What is this. What am I supposed to be doing with this.

45) "No," by Meghan Trainor

dude same

44) "Let It Go," by James Bay

It took me a little bit to realize James Bay was a separate entity from James Blake, who himself is a separate entity from the tennis player. Basically I briefly thought I was gonna get a jam from the former ATP world #4. I didn't. I also briefly thought this might have been a cover of the Passenger song, though, so that's a plus.

43) "One Call Away," by Charlie Puth

About 15 years ago, Chingy made headlines when the video for his song "One Call Away" featured a performance from Keisha Knight-Pulliam, then and still best known as Rudy from The Cosby Show. The Wikipedia page for Chingy states that he has joined a group called the Black Hebrew Israelites, which is for African-Americans who believe they are descended from the ancient Israelites, which, as far as wackadoo religious beliefs go, is far from the most outlandish thing I've ever heard; the Bible never said that, when God parted the Red Sea, he did so in a straight line. It coulda been a curve. We weren't there. We don't know. The point is, Chingy's "One Call Away" is still the song I will most associate with this title, despite Charlie Puth's best... efforts? It’s hard to tell.

42) "Like I'm Gonna Lose You," by Meghan Trainor & John Legend

goddamnit, guys

41) "Controlla," by Drake

I always forget that Drake is just okay at singing, too. Not a lot of dudes can be just ok at rapping and just ok at singing. He's a rare talent.

40) "Same Old Love," by Selena Gomez

Like, this. This is why I appreciate Daya. Daya wasn't this.

39) "Here," by Alessia Cara

But Daya wasn't this, either. Remember this song? This was a great time! A 2015 track if ever there was, but hey, nice to be reminded this song exists!

38) "i hate u, i love u" by Gnash ft./Olivia O'Brien

god this is ponderous. take yourself less seriously, man. "wedding bells were alarms." what is wrong with you. you're a pop musician. listen to Bright Light Bright Light or Fleur East for fuck's sake, get over yourself.

37) "Jumpman," by Drake and Future

I could try to make a joke about how the song Jumpman had its name changed to Mario when it was released somewhere else, but man, that sounds hard. Please just acknowledge that I have demonstrated awareness that the video game character Mario was originally called Jumpman. Please appreciate my knowledge of pop culture fun facts.

36) "Dangerous Woman," by Ariana Grande

I guess the thing is, Ari can release songs like this all she wants, but that won't change the fact that the rumor she has someone who carries her around like a baby everywhere she goes is the most believable rumor in entertainment. Like, everything about that makes sense. It's perfect, and I'm never going to stop believing it, no matter how much leather she wears.

35) "Don't," by Bryson Tiller

OK I officially really dig this dude after he just said the word "skurt" instead of doing the high-pitched trilled-r version of the word. Like, he just said the word "skurt," probably because he can't trill his rs. I love that. This dude's cool in my book.

34) "Broccoli," by Big Baby D.R.A.M. ft./Lil Yachty

i will never know the feeling of stumbling into a time machine and suddenly finding myself 1000 years in the future, the feeling of walking into a world and realizing it has advanced far beyond my comprehension. i can only listen to this song.

33) "Just Like Fire," by P!nk

I looked at the list of #1 country singles to see how many women had scored #1 hits on the country charts. It was three, which was about what I was expecting, but one of them was Pink, who did a duet with Kenny Chesney, and it's just, I accept mortality? But that doesn't mean I have to like it. At least Pink is still dependable. This is minor Pink, but I'd hear the worst Pink song ("Get the Party Started") a million times before I heard "i hate u, i love u" ever again.

32) "The Hills," by The Weeknd

one year, one list

31) "What Do You Mean?" by Justin Bieber

ONE YEAR, ONE LIST

30) "Low Life," by Future ft./The Weeknd

Man, when you put yourself in a situation where you have to listen to a shitton of The Weeknd songs in a short span of time, you appreciate just how good he really is.

29) "Too Good," by Drake ft./Rihanna

So I accidentally clicked on a video of two white teens singing this song instead of the original version? But like I've always said Drake's music is best when interpreted by white teens (see: the late Christina Grimmie singing "Hold On, We're Going Home"), so I'm not gonna say this was a mistake. Oh wait this is a trap cover. Okay. I was not expecting that. Well.

28) "Treat You Better," by Shawn Mendes

So okay I kinda only said this child sounded like Master Shake because the girl in the other song sounded enough like Meatwad that I was willing to say he sounded like Master Shake for the sake of the joke? But see, when I listened to this song, even though this guy didn't sound like Master Shake again, I still heard Master Shake. Create your own reality. Alternate facts. Personal bubbles. We are kings in our heads. I choose to believe this song is a cover of “I Want Candy.”

27) "Roses," by The Chainsmokers ft./ROZES

This song is pretty much "Closer, Jr." Like if you're not ready for "Closer," this would be a way to get you prepared.

26) "Send My Love (To Your New Lover)," by Adele

hey guys adele's morose again, wow, such a powerful artistic statement, greatest voice of our generation

25) "Cold Water," by Major Lazer ft./Justin Bieber & MO

You know, 2016 was awful for a lot of reasons, but Justin Bieber was not one of them, and that itself is actually a reason 2016 was bad. Luckily, time behaves as we want it to, so the world knows to be better because we put new calendars on the wall!

24) "Hotline Bling," by Drake

come on

23) "Stitches," by Shawn Mendes

COME ON

22) "Pillowtalk," by Zayn

Okay real talk we've had our fun the last few years with Ariana Grande's enunciation, but, and I'm willing to concede that I just don't follow the right people, but how the fuck are we letting this dude slide. The song is called "Pillowtalk." He gets six quarter-notes to append the lk. Nope. He just shouts "PILLOWTAAAAAAA." This is unacceptable. Also I'm writing this to listen to the song, and I minimzed the WordPad window after writing the last sentence to check the score of an NFL-brand football game, and I saw a woman bleeding from the eyebrows. Bro, this is a song about how nice it is to have sex. Calm the fuck down.

21) "Heathens," by twenty one pilots

I don't get this and I have zero interest in ever getting it. The reward for getting it isn't worth the effort it would take to get it.

20) "Ride," by twenty one pilots

I have a headache

19) "Me, Myself & I," by G-Eazy ft/Bebe Rexha

see, you know this song is worthless because it omits the oxford comma from the title, something it shares in common with the beyonce song of the same name, which is hands-down her worst single. i'm not even going to listen to it. why should i? it already aligned itself against me.

18) "Cake by the Ocean," by DNCE

THIS IS THE BREEZY SUMMER JAM I HAVE BEEN NEEDING FOR LIKE TEN SONGS, NOW. YOU HEARING THIS SHIT, ZAYN? YOU PAYING ATTENTION, GNASH? IT'S A SONG ABOUT EATING CAKE, AND MAYBE CAKE IS A METAPHOR FOR SOMETHING BUT WHO CARES, THE SONG DOESN’T WANT YOU TO PAY ATTENTION, THE SONG WANTS YOU TO GET INTO A CHILL-ASS GROOVE. BLESS THIS FUCKING SONG. I don't feel compelled to acquaint myself further with this group and their works, but hot damn, if I can't get "Bad 4 Us" in the year-end Hot 100, this is an acceptabe substitute.

17) "This Is What You Came For," by Calvin Harris ft./Rihanna

Rihanna is the queen of songs where you just need one line repeated a million times for three and a half minutes. Also one of these days I'm going to figure out what I'm supposed to be hearing in a Calvin Harris song that everyone else is evidently hearing.

16) "Work From Home," by Fifth Harmony ft./Ty Dolla $ign

Having only seen two Fifth Harmony videos, I can say I have the utmost respect for what Fifth Harmony is trying to do with their platform. Bless these young women for committing themselves to putting a thousand hot sweaty men in their music videos. It’s important work.

15) "I Took a Pill in Ibiza," by Mike Posner

I was not expecting this song to be this. This is dope. It's the grooviest Medium post of the year.

14) "My House," by Flo Rida

I said this in a post about Eurovision or something, but Flo Rida has been making really good and trashy pop/rap singles for a decade, and his longevity is something we should be respecting. Flo Rida dropped "Low" the year Kanye dropped Graduation, and he dropped "My House" the year Kanye dropped The Life of Pablo. That is incredible. He's the Pink of the rap game. No one will ever write a think piece about him or think about his music longer than the song is being played, but he is a reliable dispenser of acceptable music. I love you, Flo Rida, for all you do.

13) "Needed Me," by Rihanna

"Pon de Replay" was released two years before "Low." Let's have a brief talk about how long Rihanna has been relevant. She's not even 30 yet! She won't turn 30 until next year! She's younger than Mike Posner, okay by like eight days BUT STILL! That's so incredible! And she has been doing the same thing the entire 12 years! Like, after the transition from "Pon de Replay"/dancehall Rihanna to "Umbrella"/pop megastar Rihanna, she hasn't really done anything interesting, just solid work on a million different songs! Consistency, man. I don't think there's one Rihanna song I could point to and say, "Now THAT'S a song!" or whatever, but I don't think there's a bad single in her oeuvre.

12) "7 Years," by Lukas Graham

There needs to be a happy medium between ZAYN saying "pillowtaaaaa" and this dude hammering every single sound like pronouncing every word correctly is the most important thing in the world.

11) "Cheap Thrills," by Sia ft./Sean Paul

Before I heard this song, I just sorta assumed that Sean Paul was trapped in 2003, where he belonged. Now that I have heard this song, I can confirm that he is trapped in 2003, but he doesn’t seem to mind too terribly. When "Get Busy" was a hit, Sia was on the Garden State soundtrack. That this song exists is a million miracles.

10) "Closer," by The Chainsmokers ft./Halsey

The definitive words on this song have been said, and I will only add that I'm stunned it's only the 10th-biggest song of 2016.

9) "Can't Stop the Feeling!" by Justin Timberlake

The thing about J Timbies is, we gave him a lot of credit for dropping "Cry Me a River" and winning the break-up with Britney, and he has been coasting on that credit for years. More people bought this song than the smash hit #1 single "Closer" by The Chainsmokers, featuring Halsey. This is just "Can't Feel My Face" by the nice white boy who made one good song 15 years ago. This is from the fucking Trolls movie. Say what you will about Despicabe Me 2, at least the franchise was semi-original, it had those adorable minions, it wasn't a pure cash grab, and it deserved "Happy." This is just gross.

8) "Don't Let Me Down," by The Chainsmokers ft./Daya

These dudes made "Selfie." What a stunning turnaround.

7) "Hello," by Adele

it's an adele song, i don't know what you want from me

6) "Panda," by Desiigner

i still don't understand why this song popped up on The Life of Pablo in its original form. Like, Kanye was just, "Yo dudes, I found this new track you guys'll really dig," and apparently we did?

5) "Stressed Out," by twenty one pilots

Like, I get it? Their whole thing? But I'm so fucking old.

4) "Work," by Rihanna ft./Drake

There's a video somewhere of a small pig jiggling in time with this song, and I will not find this video, because it is the sort of thing I believe should only be viewed once and permanently burned into the memory. This song is important solely for that incredible video of the jiggling pig.

3) "One Dance," by Drake ft./Kyla & Wizkid

You know what I just realized? I thought many rap records were better than Drake's. I get why Tribe or De La Soul wouldn't make an appearance in the top 100, and I get that Danny Brown has little mainstream appeal, but like Q doesn't get any love on the pop charts? Young Thug only gets in with a feature on a goddamned Usher track? Not enough people listened to YG's "FDT" to make it explode? Drake is really the only rapper the kids like? I just, I wish I understood. And DANCEHALL Drake, at that, easily the worst Drake.

2) "Sorry," by Justin Bieber

1) "Love Yourself," by Justin Bieber

So basically, Justin Bieber did the child star bulshit we expected he would end up doing from the moment we heard “Baby,” and then we released some jams and we forgave him for being a shit, because that’s what we do, “Ignition (Remix)” made the world forget R. Kelly peed on a minor, “Love Yourself” could’ve gotten Biebs exonerated for any number on crimes. He couldn’t pee on a minor, it’s not like legendary, but vandalism and DUIs, hell yeah, “Lose Yourself” can cover that. But: did “Love Yourself” need Biebs to be “Love Yourself?” Did Biebs bring anything to that song that made that song what it is, or is “Love Yourself” a song that would still be killer even if they gave it to like Gnash or some other chucklefuck?

THE TOP TEN OF THIS GROUP OF 100, EXCEPTING THINGS I LOVE BUT STRONGLY FEEL SHOULD BE DISQUALIFIED 10) “Starving,” by Hailee Steinfeld & Grey ft./Zedd 9) “Don’t,” by Bryson Tiller 8) “On My Mind,” by Ellie Goulding 7) “Gold,” by Kiiara 6) “All the Way Up,” by Fat Joe & Remy Ma ft./French Montana & Infared 5) “Cake by the Ocean,” by DNCE 4) “Starboy,” by The Weeknd 3) “I Took a Pill in Ibiza,” by Mike Posner 2) “Sorry,” by Beyonce 1) “Closer,” by The Chainsmokers ft./Halsey

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