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jamielea81 · 4 years

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Conversations

Chapter 14

Description: You accompany your friends on a day trip to Animal Kingdom Theme Park where you meet Scott Evans by chance. This one afternoon leads to a year long friendship with both Chris and Scott over text messages and phone calls.

Pairing: Chris Evans x Reader

Warning: So much fluff. A few curse words.

Word Count: 6,435

A/N: And here it is, the final chapter of this series. Thank you to all of you who followed along, reblogged and encouraged me to keep writing. More Chris Evans series are to come. Special thanks to @panicfob who asked me if I ever thought about writing a series like this and @allaboutthebooz who told me about a Steve Rogers Disney series she was writing which in turn really got me into a Disney frame of mind. Please tell me what you thought of the series! There will be two one-shots that accompany this. One will be posted next month with the second posted in March. Stay tuned.

*Italics are internal thoughts

Catch up with Chapter 13

In retrospect, moving to New England in the midst of winter probably wasn’t a wise choice. When you moved to Florida all those years ago it was during the summer. It appears your timing is never right. You’ve slipped on icy sidewalks more times than you can count as it seems no one is nice enough to salt and sand the sidewalks surrounding their houses and businesses. You haven’t quite mastered public transportation so you take your chances walking the snowy roads for coffee and grocery items. You’ve learned parking really is a hot commodity until you get of further into the suburbs. For now, you’ll take the extra steps on your health app as they continue to grow.

Speaking of timing, Chris wasn’t even in the state when the moving truck rolled into town. You knew he wouldn’t be and it was probably better that way. You weren’t moving in together, so adjusting to the change without him would only further help you adjust with being on your own. The only caveat to that is you were rarely alone. The Evans clan had seemingly adopted you without your consent. Surprisingly, you were enjoying your adopted Massachusetts family.

When Chris told Lisa about your thoughts on moving to Boston, she asked to speak to you before you went home to Florida during your visit in October. If you were nervous the first time you met her, you were in full panic mode this time. Chris telling his mother everything was something you would need to get used to. God forbid you two have a huge fight at some point and then have to see his mom shortly after. Nope, that wouldn’t be awkward at all.

Chris drove you over with Dodger in tow. The two of them played outside while Lisa fixed you a cup of coffee and essentially asked what your intensions with her son were.

“I’m thinking about moving here to give Chris and I a fighting chance. The distance is hard, Lisa. You probably already know this, but he has flown to Orlando to see me three times in the last month and a half. He’s already busy and this is only wearing him down more. I don’t want that.” You took a breath, ignoring your coffee completely. “I’m not one of those women who’s trying to weasel her way in to his life. Chris and I were friends first and if this whole thing goes to hell, I hope we’re still friends because I’m not giving him or Scott up.”

Lisa smiled, stood up, pulled you to your feet and hugged you. “I think everything is going to turn out just how it should,” she said.

You sighed in relief. “Thanks, Lisa.”

“You should come for Christmas!” she blurted out after releasing you.

You chuckled softly. “My mother would kill me if I didn’t go home to Minnesota.”

“Well, we wouldn’t want that. Come the week after for New Year’s.” Before you could say no, she continued. “I insist.”

Looks like I’m going to Boston for New Years.

“Okay… We should probably check with Chris though.”

“Trust me, if you’re here, my son will be too.”

Christmas in Minnesota was interesting. A lot of the time was spent talking and explaining yourself. Your brother still wanted to kick Chris’ ass and you couldn’t blame him. The two of them hadn’t met and he was pissed when he saw those photos on TMZ. You made a mental note to get Chris and Heath together to bond. Heath didn’t know Chris like you did and he didn’t understand that the two of you had discussed your relationship at length and were committed to each other.

While your mother was sad that you had chosen not to move back home, she was happy for you and understood the need for a change. She teased you relentlessly about moving somewhere with a true winter. After graduating from college, you declared that you’d never live in a snowy state again. Now you had tentative plans with Lisa to apartment hunt next week.

Your father was another story. You weren’t above bribery so you took him to dinner at his favorite steakhouse. Hoping the appeal of an expensive cut of meat would put him in a cheery mood. It was Christmastime after all. His spirit should already be lighter.

When you changed jobs in October, you told him about it almost immediately. Gary didn’t appreciate being left in the dark. You never called him Gary to his face, but when you ever spoke about your dad to Jana, you referred to him as Gary much to her amusement. He wasn’t happy about the job change which was of no surprise to you. He didn’t understand why you would make a change when you had a great position with the paper. “This is just like you,” he had said. “You’re never settled.” It wasn’t a fair statement. You had been settled for years. Yes, you weren’t married and you didn’t own your own home, but you had a career and had been at the paper for years. You were well respected in your field. There was absolutely nothing wrong with moving on to a position that would bring you growth in your career as well as your personal life.

If you hadn’t broken the news about the move in a public space, there was no doubt in your mind that he would have stormed out.

“Why on earth would you move to Massachusetts? I thought Florida was where you wanted to plant roots. This is just like you.”

There he goes with that same line. You sighed loudly, poking at your steak with your fork. You lowered your face, refusing to meet his eyes. It was like your twelve years old again, dropping out of soccer only to be lectured by your father.

“When are you going to get your life together?” he asked.

You snapped, well, you snapped as much as you could in a restaurant full of people having a holiday meal.

“That’s exactly it. This is my life dad. I’m choosing to make a change that’s going to fulfill me personally,” you said sternly in a voice just a tad louder than a whisper. “And yes, it’s a big change and yes, it’s scary. But. But.” Picking up your glass of wine, you took a large gulp and set it back on the table. “This is what I need to do. If I’m going to fail, I will fail. But what if this turns out to be the best thing for me? I want you in my life to celebrate my successes, but I also need you if life chooses to spit me out.” Your dad leaned back in his chair, a tired expression on his face. “Can you just try to be here for me if I need you?”

“Of course, Y/N. I’m always going to be here. But I worry. What if you’re making a mistake?”

“Then it’s something I’ll learn from and I’ll just try again.”

The week of New Year’s you stayed with Chris. His home was now completely remodeled, so that was one less stressful thing in his life. It was gorgeous when it was half under construction, now it was beautiful enough to be featured in a magazine on home design. It wasn’t a mansion by any means, it was just a very nice, large, upper class, suburban home. Well, a suburban home with a state-of-the-art alarm system. The house was luxurious without being pretentious and you found it strange to feel so comfortable there.

Chris was flying out to Atlanta and then to Costa Rica for filming the day after you flew back home to Orlando. It was a stressful time for him but he made sure to tell you every night that just you being there was helping. Chris was also incredibly clingy the whole trip. You chalked it up to him wanting to spend as much time with you as possible and also the anxiety of starting up a new project. Especially one that would take him away from home for a couple of months.

Every day the two of you cuddled on the couch and spent nights tangled in the sheets. Chris had only been able to visit once in November, so the two of you were making up for lost time. It was your first Christmas together as a couple and you weren’t together for it. Both of you had Facetimed for hours after both your family parties had ended. It wasn’t quite the same, but falling asleep with your phone held close to your face was the next best thing.

“Celebrating the new year together is going to be way more magical than Christmas. Christmas is old news sweetheart,” he said the night before New Year’s Eve. Your lips so close together that you couldn’t help but lean forward bridging the gap in a soft kiss. “This year brought me you. Next year can only get better.”

Apartment hunting was not going well. Like, not at all. Any place that Lisa considered to be decent enough to stay in was well over your price range. Not just an extra hundred or two a month over your budget, but close to one thousand dollars over the monthly amount you wanted to spend. Lisa told you she would keep an eye out for listings and send them to you as she found them. This move was looking to be more difficult than you thought it would be. You hadn’t lived with a roommate since college, but if you wanted to live anywhere near Chris, a roommate is something you would have to get used to.

New Year’s Eve was probably the most fun you’ve had in a long time. Granted, you didn’t remember the whole night, but the majority of it was worth the headache in the morning.

Chris, Scott, Zach, Shanna, Carly and you had spent dinner at Lisa’s and played games with the kids until they went to bed after celebrating the New Year at eight that night. There was sparkling cider, confetti, and kisses from all the kids to bring in 2021. Chris had arranged a car to pick the two of you along with Zach and Scott up to take you to their friend Benji’s house for the rest of the evening. You weren’t entirely sure if that was really his name or if it was a nickname he picked up at some point. Regardless, Benji’s house was packed to the brim with people. Chris threw so many names at you as he moved his way through the house that you just started smiling and nodding. Hopefully you’d meet his closer friends in a much smaller and quieter setting in the future.

To say you were feeling quite shy was an understatement. Scott had talked you into buying a dress that was shorter than you felt comfortable with. Your butt was completely covered, but you usually didn’t show as much thigh as you were currently sporting. The gold number was long sleeved with a high neck that provided some warmth, but the back was cut low which added to the “sexy New Year’s vibe” as Scott called it. Scott dressed in a black suit and gold tie which was why he was adamant you buy the dress when you saw it in a shop window earlier in the week. Chris was another story. He didn’t want to dress up, opting to wear jeans and sweater that he later removed when he became too hot, leaving him in a plain black t-shirt. This is why Scott was your date for the night. Technically Scott and Zach were your dates for the night. More so Scott as the two of you coordinated. Chris had fun making a game of it by pulling you away from Scott several times over the night to kiss you in “secret” as he didn’t want your “date” to find out. It was cute and if you were being honest, kind of hot.

You didn’t want to get drunk. Wanting to remember the night was important to you not only because it was your first New Year’s with Chris, but because there were too many of his friends at this party. Giving off the impression of Chris’ drunk girlfriend wasn’t what you were aiming for, so you kept the drinking light. A couple of beers and you cut yourself off. You grabbed a plastic cup and dumped a bottle of water into. It was a trick you used to do in college when you didn’t want to get pestered about not drinking.

“Y/N! Sassy!” Scott called from the across the room.

“My date needs me,” you teased Chris.

His smirk said it all. You turned away from him and he promptly squeezed your ass. You chased his hand away with yours but laughed at his advances.

“Grumpy, what can I do for you?” you asked.

“This my dear, is Nicolette. Nicolette, this is Y/N,” he said, throwing an arm over your shoulder and bringing you closer.

You stuck your free hand out for her to shake. “Nice to meet you.”

“You as well,” she replied.

“So, Nicolette here needs a roommate,” Scott spoke, wiggling his eyebrows. “And since I know both of you, I know the two of you would get along.”

Taken aback by the sudden suggestion, you were sure your face looked somewhat shocked. You trusted Scott and you knew he wouldn’t set you up with a crazy person.

Nicolette laughed. “It’s true. I have a room available after my last roommate got married and ditched me. It’s a two-bedroom house with two bathrooms. I’m barely home, so it’s really kind of a house-sitting slash roommate situation.”

Now she had your interest.

“She’s a stage actress,” Scott said dramatically which causes Nicolette to roll her eyes. “She does a lot of traveling shows.”

“If you have time tomorrow, you can stop by and check it out,” she offered.

“Yeah. That would actually be great,” you replied.

The two of you exchanged numbers and Scott pulled you away shortly after, bringing you back to your boyfriend. “I got you girl!”

At midnight, Chris held you close with his chest pressed against your back and arms around your front. Benji stood on top of his pool table, large oversized wall clock in his hand calling out the last few seconds of 2020. Just as he shouted happy new year, Chris spun you around and kissed you, deep and slow. It went on for quite awhile as Scott eventually had the pull both of you apart.

The night was a blur from that moment on. You got dragged into a game of beer pong which later turned into four games of beer pong despite your objections of not being a great player. Scott and Chris passed you back and forth as their partner. The end result was always the same, you having to drink several of the cups with floating Ping-Pong balls inside.

The car service is called by someone, you’re just not quite sure who. All you remember is being pushed into the car and then out of it. Chris and you make it inside but don’t get further than his couch where you promptly push him onto it and straddle his thighs. The 2021 version of you is apparently very horny as you take control of the early morning hours of January first. The button of his jeans is popped open with the zipper quickly pulled down while your gold dress is pushed up over your ass. He’s all consuming and very eager for you to take control.

Chris kisses you like it’s the last time from the short-term parking ramp a couple of days later. Tears flow easily from your eyes as you say your goodbyes. He leaves for Atlanta tomorrow for stage shoots then on to Costa Rica. There are no planned visits between you as per his manager and assistant, there just isn’t time. He’s not set to be back state side until March. It’ll be a long three months that just happens to coincide with big changes for you.

Chris wipes your tears away with one hand while the other cradles your faces.

“Don’t cry sweetheart,” he murmurs, bringing his lips to yours in a short soft kiss.

“Why? Cause it makes your cry?” you asked, nose already stuffy from your tears.

He chuckles and blinks away his tears.

“No,” he said softly, licking his lips. “Cause I love you.”

Chris loves you. Chris loves you. You’ve felt it. You’ve been saying it in your head since Thanksgiving, but haven’t been able to say the words out loud. With your gloved hands, you pull his face to yours and kiss him. Pulling back, you rip off your gloves and drop them to the cold cement ground before grabbing his cheeks once more. The kiss is hungry and needy. You’re both out of breath when you part.

“I love you too. God, do I love you.”

Chris smiled softly, giving your nose a kiss. “I’m going to call you every day.”

“Babe…” you sigh out. “We both know that may not happen. You’re going to have days where your exhausted or have late shoots. Just-Just call me when you can. It’s going to be hard and it’s probably going to kill me, but when you’re back, we’ll be in the same state,” you smiled. “We’re only like forty minutes away from each other rather than a three hour plane ride.”

“We’ll make it work. I love you so much,” he said, kissing you again. “Call me when you land.”

You nodded, kissed him once more then walked to the terminal.

Carly was calling you for the second time that day. Her first message was asking about getting together for lunch. You weren’t trying to avoid her, but you had been starring at the same blank page for three hours. The deadline for your story on a protest that took place over college campuses across the US this morning needed to be submitted within the next two hours. Your head wasn’t in the game, so despite Carly calling twice, and Scott once, you were tempted to put your phone on silent. Chris had been MIA for two days now. He had kept to his promise of calling you daily over the last three months, even if it were just ten minutes to check in. You were trying to not let it bother you, but you’d be lying if you said you didn’t miss his voice. Production was delayed by two weeks keeping him in Costa Rica longer than expected. You’d been in Boston since the end of January and it was now the first week of April.

You shot Carly a text telling her that you were busy with work.

Y/N: Lunch tomorrow?

Carly: Of course. Good luck!

Nicolette was on the road working on a production of Aladdin, so you had the house to yourself. They were set to perform in Boston in May and she had promised you tickets. A perk of knowing one of the stars of the show. She was rarely home so it really was like living on your own with someone else’s furniture. You had donated or sold everything except for your bedroom set since you didn’t want to pay for storage and you weren’t entirely sure how long you’d be living with Nicolette. When you eventually moved out on your own, you’d have to start new, but that wasn’t anything to worry about now.

An hour later you were almost done with the article after turning on your “get shit done” playlist as you so perfectly named it. After proofreading it for the third time and two key strokes away from submitting it to your editor, there was a knock on your door. Despite living in the city for more than two months, you didn’t know anyone outside of the Evans family plus a few friends you’ve met through Scott and Shanna, but they generally didn’t show up unannounced. You chose to ignore it, assuming it was someone selling something or another for the scouts or a representative from a church wanting to spread the word of God. But the knocking wouldn’t stop. It was persistent and loud. You almost dove under your desk to hide, despite the shades in your room being drawn. After what felt like five straight minutes of knocking, you left the safe comforts of your room and walked to the front door. The sooner you answered, the sooner they would go away and you could take that nap after submitting the article.

Lifting a corner of the curtain on the living room curtain as inconspicuously as possible to see who it was, you audibly squealed and ran to the door. Throwing it open you screamed again much to Chris’ amusement.

“What the fuck are you doing here?!”

“Hello to you too sweetheart,” he chuckled, throwing his arms around you and pulling you close. Neither of you are saying anything, just enjoying holding each other. You snuggle your nose in the crock of his neck, breathing in everything that is Chris. One hand traveled up the back of his neck to his hair. The strands are longer and you can’t wait to play with them later.

“Missed you,” you murmur into his neck.

“Missed you so much, Y/N,” he replied, kissing your temple. “Can I come in?” he said with a soft smile.

“Oh my gosh, of course,” you can’t help but giggle out.

The next fifty minutes are spent christening your bed more than once, even though the two of you have had sex on your bed before. To Chris’ point, this is the first time he’s “banged” you on your bed in Massachusetts. His words, not yours.

With your face pressed against his chest, your fingers draw shapes through the hairs on his stomach. “I like the longer hair. It’s kind of sexy in a nineteen eighties kind of way.” Chris hums. “Maybe you should keep it.” You lift your head up to catch his expression. He’s smirking but shakes his head. “I’m serious. It’s kind of like how you had it in Red Sea Diving Resort. The ladies really dig it.”

His hand that was rubbing your back starts to dig into your sides until you can barely breathe as you’re laughing so hard. “The only” *tickle “lady” tickle* “that I’m” *tickle “trying to” tickle* “impress” tickle* “is you!”

“Mercy! Mercy! Mercy!” you shout until he finally ends his attack.

Chris pulls you back close and kisses your lips. “I never want to go that long without seeing you again.”

“I agree. I’ll live in your rental car on location if I have to.” He kisses your temple in reply. “M’happy you’re here, but I wasn’t expecting you for another week.”

“We pushed through. Long hours to finish up, but it was worth it. I love you so much sweetheart.”

You sit up until your seated on your bottom. Raking your fingers through his hair, you look him in his eyes. “I love you too. I’m so happy you’re home and I can’t believe we are living in the same state.”

“Same city practically.”

You nod in agreement, pushing a strand that has fallen over his forehead back. “I’m also glad Nicolette’s out of town.” Chris chuckles and closes his eyes. “You tired baby?”

“Yeah, had an early flight and then a long layover. Mind if I nap?”

“Course not. I’ve actually…Oh shit! I have an article I haven’t sent in yet!” You jump out of the bed, looking for something to throw on. You pick up Chris’ undershirt and slip it over your head. You hop back in the bed and give him a kiss before returning to your desk a few feet away and hit send. “I forgot to hit send before I answered the door.” You swivel in the chair to face him, point your finger at him. “You sir, are a distraction.”

“A damn good one,” he said so casually. Chris pats the empty spot on the bed. “Come nap with me.”

“Can’t refuse you.”

Spring turns into summer in no time at all. Chris spends more time in Boston than he does in Los Angeles. He told you that from the beginning, but with how much he works, you didn’t expect him to be home as much as he has been. When he is gone, it’s only for a few days. Despite having a roommate that is never home, most of your nights are spent at Chris’ places.

“Dodger misses you. He likes when you sleep in bed with us.”

“Oh, so it’s Dodger that misses me. Not you Mr. Evans?”

“Nope. It’s all Dodger. I just can’t take the whining. Promised I’d call you.”

“You’re such a brat,” you groan.

“You love me. Plus, my bed is bigger. It’s too much of a squeeze if I bring Dodger to yours. Cah’mon,” he groaned. “You know you want to.”

“Fine. Fine. I’m only coming over for Dodger though.”

When you arrive at Chris’ place and let yourself in because he insisted you have a key, you see the lights are dimmed and candles are lit throughout the living room.

“Babe?” you called out. Passing through the living room and into the kitchen. You see a couple of pans on the stove simmering away, but no Chris. You walk up the stairs towards the bedroom, pushing open the door. “Babe?” you called out again.

Chris is standing in front of the bed while Dodger lays on it. More lit candles are scattered on the dresser and night stands.

“Hi Beautiful,” he said, stepping forward and grasping your hands.

“What’s all this?” you asked.

“Happy anniversary.”

“It’s our anniversary?” you asked, head titled to the side.

“To me it is.” He took a big breath and smiled. “Now, I know we had a rough start, but on this day, one year ago, I knew I was head over heels for you. Technically, I’d say our anniversary was back in May. That’s when we started talking a lot more and of course that’s the month we first kissed. But it was July when I knew I could never go back to being just friends. It was July when I knew that I needed to hear your voice every day. It was on this day in July that I knew we were going to be something special.” Your breath was stolen from your lungs as cliché as that sounds. “I love you baby.”

Fat tears rolled down your cheeks, a few landing on your lips as you couldn’t contain the sappy grin on your face. You grabbed his face with both hands, smooshing his cheeks. “I love you, you crazy, wonderful man. Happy anniversary.”

Compromises were made as Chris dragged you to Red Sox games in the early fall and then to Patriot games in the early winter. You were forever a Twins and Vikings fan, even though they broke your heart every year. You played nice, accepting the jerseys he gifted you for both teams. The two of you flew to Minnesota to meet your family in late September. Heath and Chris attended a Twins game together as a truce in the new found friendship they were working on. They weren’t best friends, but you hoped they would grow closer. When the Vikings played on Sundays, Chris watched with you so long as it didn’t cut into his Pats’ games, but he refused to wear a Vikings jersey. The funny thing was, you rarely watched football or baseball, but found yourself getting really into it the more you played along with the non-existent rivalry.

In October you flew to Florida to cover Magic Kingdom’s fiftieth anniversary. Chris was off on a press tour on the other side of the country. You extended your stay since Chris wouldn’t be back for another week, opting to stay with Jana and Brooks rather than a hotel. The biggest surprise was Jana’s small baby bump.

“I’m going to be Auntie Y/N?” you asked, tears in your eyes.

“You bet your ass you are,” she said, tears in her eyes as well. “Way to make a pregnant woman cry.”

You pulled her into a hug. “Shush. And you should clean up that mouth before the baby gets here,” you snorted.

By the time you got back to Massachusetts, you had a week and a half reprieve before you were flying back into Orlando with the majority of the Evans crew for their annual Disney vacation. Lisa had invited you herself before Chris even got around to asking you. He later said he wasn’t going to ask because you had no choice in the matter.

“I can’t believe I’m going back as an actual tourist,” you whined to him on the plane.

“You were just there!”

“That was for work. Doesn’t count. I don’t even have my annual pass anymore. What is this bizarro world?”

“So dramatic. Should really be an actress,” he said, nudging you with his elbow.

The trip was great despite the long days in the park. It was a treat to have a Disney Cast Member leading your group around for most of the trip. It sure cut back on the time you usually stood in line.

The downside of the trip were the pictures that were posted online of you and Chris. The two of you did your best not to touch when out in public places, but you both found that hard. Chris would often place his hand on your back leading you from one spot to another. Even though you often sat with Scott or Carly on several of the rides, the ones where you sat with Chris were the ones that were posted. It didn’t take fans long to recognize that you were the same girl pictured with him two years before. Taking Chris’ advise, you didn’t read the comments online and avoided Twitter like the plague. Chris said you both needed to go on like you had been. If you both kept your relationship private, people would eventually lose interest. And they did for the most part.

Christmas was spent in Boston with the Evans family. You bargained with your mother for the week after Christmas and she agreed much to your surprise.

Despite Lisa’s insistence that you and Chris spend the night at her house Christmas Eve, Chris wasn’t having it. He wanted to go home after gift opening and spend it with just the two of you.

You barely made it in the door before Chris was wrapping you in his arms.

“What’s gotten into you?” you asked with a laugh.

He kissed your cheek. His warm breath tickled your nose, causing you to hunch, lowering your head and burying it in his chest.

“Move in with me.”

Huh?

He said is so casually as if he’s asking if you want a glass of water.

You pull your face away from his body and hold him at arm’s length. “You wanna say that again?”

“Move in with me. I want you to live here. I can’t handle Dodger askin’ every day.”

“Oh! So, it’s Dodger,” you said, poking his chest. Upon hearing his name, Dodger got up from the couch and came to stand next to you, his butt bumping against your leg. “I’m sorry Bubba, but I can’t move in. It seems that only one of the Evans boys that live here want me to move in. I need a unanimous vote.”

“Cah’mon. Don’t break his heart like that. He said you give the best belly rubs and frankly I can’t compete,” Chris said crossing his arms over his chest.

“I don’t know,” you said, finger tapping against your chin in thought.

“Fine…” Chris dramatically sighed out, rolling his eyes. “You have my vote too. Move in with us.”

You bend down to give Dodger a belly rub, avoiding Chris’ eyes. “Nah.”

“What?!” Chris shouts causing Dodger to get back on his feet and you to fall on your ass. You erupt in giggles. Dodger walks circles around you, tail wagging excitedly.

“You turnin’ me down? Is that’s what’s happenin’ sweetheart?” He drops to his knees in front of you, resting on his hunches. The laughs die out on your breath and you slowly start to breathe normally again.

“Ask me again,” you whispered.

One hand rested on his thigh, while the other runs through your hair taming the pieces that have fallen in your eyes. “Will you move in with me?”

You nod your head slowly. “Yes,” you answer simply enough.

“Yes?” he asked, big smile slowly forming on his face.

“Yes,” you repeat. You let out a big huff of air. “Now, take me to our bedroom.”

Before you’re even fully awake, your phone is buzzing like crazy Christmas morning. Reaching blindly to the night stand since Chris has extreme blackout curtains on the windows, you couldn’t see your phone if you tried. Technically, they were your curtains now.

Scott: It’s already been 9 hours and you haven’t called me about you livin’ in sin with my brother

Scott: Get dressed and come to breakfast at Ma’s

Scott: That’s an order

Chris had one arm resting over his eyes with the blanket pushed down to his waist. You turned to face him, kissing his bare chest until he starts to stir.

“How does Scott know I’m moving in?” you asked with a coyness in your voice.

Chris chuckles. His mouth full of sleep and his arm still resting over his eyes. “I sorta texted him when you were changing for bed.”

“You’re a brat. He texted me at seven this morning bitching that I didn’t tell him yet.”

“Sorry,” Chris said, removing his arm from his head and turning to his side to look at you.

“No, you’re not,” you scoffed.

He chuckled again, pulling you into his chest. “No, I’m not.

“Hey babe,” you shouted through the open door.

One of the guest bedrooms was turned into your office a month ago and you were still decorating slowly but surely. Chris wasn’t allowing you to pay rent which ensued into a big argument. He ultimately caved some with you paying for the lawn care as well as Dodger’s food. It was still no where near the price of rent you were paying at Nicolette’s, but you would take what you could get for now. You often did all the grocery shopping when Chris wasn’t home so he couldn’t object to you paying. With extra funds in hand, what wasn’t going into the bank you splurged on nice office furniture and some vintage Minnesota Twins pennants to hang on the wall.

“Yes, my love?” Chris said, standing in the doorway.

“Can you help me hang these?” You lifted two of the pennants, one in each hand and gave him a cheesy smile. “Please.”

“You’re killing me babe. You know how bad this makes me look? The Twins?” he scoffed.

“It’s my office. We can keep the door closed when we have company. You’ll live.”

He gave you a wet kiss on your forehead, grabbing one of the pennants from your hand. With your hand free, you wiped at your forehead and stuck your tongue out at him.

Scott had kept you busy all day with what he dubbed “Best Friend’s Day”.

It started with brunch, then on to shopping where you spent entirely too much on wool peacoat. You both got a hot stone massage followed by hot donuts from a shop you frequented before he dropped you back at your place.

“Tell Chris he owes me,” Scott said just as you shut the passenger door.

“He owes you?” you questioned. But it fell on deaf ears as Scott waved and drove away. “Why are my friends so weird?”

Unlocking the door, you stepped inside calling out to Chris.

“In here babe!” he shouted back.

Making your way to the office where you were certain you heard his voice, you saw that the door was partially closed.

That’s weird.

“Are you in my office?” you questioned just outside the door.

“Yes, now get your butt in here.”

Pushing the door open, you see Chris sitting on one of the two brown leather club chairs you had situated on the other side of your desk. On the wall above his head is a huge Red Sox logo that has to be at least three feet across. On the wall next to the window is a framed signed Tom Brady jersey.

“Welcome home sweetheart. I added some more décor to your office. Do you like it?” He’s got a huge grin on his face with his eyebrows raised.

“You are something else,” you said, shaking your head as you walk across the room taking a seat at your desk.

Chris gets up from the chair and strolls over to your desk taking a seat on it and facing you. “Something good?”

“Hmm. Not so sure about that babe. Is this what Scott owes you for? Was Best Friend’s Day a ploy to get me out of the house?”

He scratches the top of his head. “M’fraid I don’t know what you’re taklin’ about.”

“I’m sure you don’t.” You sit up slightly and grab on to the neck hole of his t-shirt, pulling him to you. “You’re lucky I like you.”

He kisses your lips and pulls back to look you in the eyes, despite your hand still firmly holding his shirt.

“I love you,” he said softly. He kissed your nose then each of your cheeks.

“I know,” you replied, letting go of his shirt and opening up your laptop.

“Did you-did you just Han Solo me?” he chuckled.

You looked up from the screen, a small smile playing on your lips. “You bet your sweet ass I did.”

“You’re gonna get it. You are so gonna get it,” he threatened. You shut the laptop and pushed back on your chair. “You better run!”

You were out of your seat as fast as you could, squeals of laughter spilling from your lips as Chris chased you through the first floor and up the stairs. “I love you!” you screamed between laughs. “I love you!”

“Damn right,” he said tackling you onto the bed you shared.

The End

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#chris evans #scott evans #chris evans x reader #chris evans reader insert #chris evans imagine #chris evans fan fiction #chris evans fan fic #chris evans fanfiction #chris evans x you #chris evans x y/n #conversations #chris x reader

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joannechocolat · 4 years

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Heigh-ho, for Halloween...

Heigh-ho for Hallowe’en

All the witches to be seen.

Some in black, some in green,

Heigh-ho, for Hallowe’en.

(Nursery rhyme, North America, 18th century)

As the year turns, the leaves fall and the autumn nights draw in once more, many of us find our thoughts turning towards witches, pumpkin lanterns, toffee apples, gingerbread, as well as finding a renewed interest in ghost stories, scary movies and costumes designed both to horrify and titillate. Hallowe’en (or Halloween, as it has become) is big business, a business commonly believed to have come to us from the US, where trick-or-treating, dressing up and generally running amok throughout the whole of October has traditionally been far more important – at least in recent memory - than it was in England.

When I was a child, October 31st was generally known as Mischief Night; a night when children played tricks on their friends and neighbours in the build-up to November 5th, Bonfire Night, which marked the execution of Guy Fawkes following the 1605 Gunpowder Plot. During the week before Bonfire Night, children would make their own guys (often in the image of politicians, historical villains or sometimes their classroom teachers), and go round the neighbourhood asking for “a penny for the guy”: money which was generally used to buy a box of fireworks, the sale of which was jealously restricted to the week of Bonfire Night, which made them all the more magical.

Schoolteachers taught us the rhyme:

Remember, remember the Fifth of November,

Gunpowder, treason and plot –

- so that when we re-enacted Guy Fawkes’ brutal execution, we would know why we were doing it – or at least, we would know the current explanation of a sacrificial rite that has existed, in one form or another, for thousands of years.

Some of my contemporaries still bemoan the “Americanization” of Hallowe’en: although, to be fair, their tradition is probably closer to the festival’s original intent than that of Bonfire Night. Indeed, it is unlikely that the Pilgrim Fathers cared enough about English politics to remember such a piece of 17th-century propaganda. Instead, they took with them to the New World an older version of the festival – a festival that predates either version, and which has its roots, both in our culture, and in the collective unconscious of the whole of humankind: a festival which celebrates the end of the year, the end of life and the mysterious cycles of death and rebirth, as echoed in the yearly cycles of the changing seasons.

But why the witches and ghosts? The origin of Hallowe’en in the West is generally thought to be found in the ancient Celtic festival of Samhain. It is the last of four festivals, each marking a quarter of the year, and it ushered in the Celtic New Year, which began on November 1st. To the Celts this was a liminal period, in which the boundaries between the worlds of the living and the dead were removed, allowing the spirits of those who have died to return to visit earth. This is a very common theme that runs through many cultures, and the timing of the festival marks the final harvests of the year, when animals stockpile stores of food for the winter months ahead, the sun sets earlier and rises later, the trees shed their leaves and the natural world moves into its annual dormant state, until its annual rebirth the following spring. The parallels between the “death” of the natural world and its “rebirth” in the springtime are clear, and it seems natural for ancient peoples to re-enact or invoke them in these ceremonies. In many cultures, there exists a need to appease, reassure or feed the dead: it is reflected in the giving of sweets to juvenile trick-or-treaters, or the setting of places at table for vanished relatives, or the offerings left outside for the fairies (once more closely linked with the dead).

These ancient, indigenous beliefs were later demonized by the Church, and the old Celtic gods and goddesses recast as devils and witches. But the need to connect with the world of the dead survived even Christianization. The Church has always been very good at appropriating festivals; renaming the Celtic new year — November 1st — as All Saints Day, or All-Hallows. The evening before it was therefore called All-hallows-eve — later becoming “Hallowe’en.” But the old symbols nevertheless survived, and the old traditions still endure. Of course, Christianity itself follows a traditional narrative of sacrifice and rebirth, a narrative that echoes the Mithraic cult as well as the cult of Osiris. And of course, the more deeply we look into these festivals, the more we see how much they owe to other cultures, other beliefs. El Diá de Muertos, or the Mexican Day of the Dead, shares many similarities with Hallowe’en, including some similar practices, from decorating with skeletons, to traditional death-themed food, like the pan de muertos and sugar skulls. But the Día de Muertos also consists of a blending of European traditions brought by Spanish conquistadores and the indigenous traditions of the peoples of Mesoamerica; the Olmecs, the Aztecs and the Incas, all of which celebrated the turn of the seasons in a strikingly similar way. Our Grim Reaper – the skeletal, hooded figure who cuts down the living like grain with his scythe – is a potent symbol, both of the harvest, and of Death: a direct link to Mesoamerican cultures. The Aztec Festival of the Dead was originally a two-month celebration during which the autumn harvest was celebrated, and figures of Death personified and worshipped. The festival was presided over by Mictecacíhuatl, Goddess of the Dead, and over the course of the festivities, participants still place offerings for the dead in front of homemade altars, including special foods, traditional flowers, candles, photographs, and other offerings. In similar fashion, the Chinese festival of the Hungry Ghosts – in which the gates of hell are opened, allowing the dead to roam - falls at the time of the autumn harvest. The ghosts must then be appeased by the living, and fed with special foods, with plates set for them at table, and offered ritual gifts of incense, clothes and money.

Almost everywhere in the world, there exist strikingly similar beliefs. Human beings have always felt the need to understand the nature of Death, as well as to try and exorcise the visceral fear we have of it. It is perhaps one of the most common themes of our shared human experience; a need to articulate our fears; our hope for the hereafter. Why are we here? Where do we go? Do we come back? Can we hope for some kind of rebirth? These are questions we have always asked; questions we never stop asking. And we’re asking them now, in our way, through ghost stories and nursery-rhymes, traditional games and ritual foods. Our lives, like the cycles of nature, are divided into seasons. Birth; maturity; old age; death. We mark them with celebrations. And on Hallowe’en we allow ourselves to look into the darkness and meditate, as does this Aztec poet, on the eternal questions:

I, Netzahulacóyotl, ask this. Do we really live with roots on earth? Only for an instant do we endure. Even jade will shatter, even gold will crush, even quetzal plumes will tear. One does not live forever on this earth: only for an instant do we endure.

Netzahualcóyotl, Aztec warrior, poet and ruler of Texcoco (1402-1472)

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thisyearingaming · 4 years

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1997 - This Year in Gaming

Muggins here was born in ‘97, and can’t really remember much of it, natch. But there were some good things released this year - I’ve played every one of these, and have missed so many more.

Diablo - Windows, January 3rd

We start with dungeon-crawl-em-up and well-loved out of season April Fool’s Joke, Diablo. I’ll be totally honest - I don’t like Diablo that much. It’s absolutely fine, I just can’t get into it. The writing, setting and characters are all very good especially since this year only marks the beginning of games being seen as a bit more adult and intelligent. Check out this gameplay from Hour of Oblivion on YouTube, and marvel at the faux-Scottish accent on Griswold the blacksmith.

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Mario Kart 64 - Nintendo 64, February 10th

Compared to its more recent versions, Mario Kart 64 is a veritable bloody relic of the past - solid controls and a quirky style mean it’s still a crowd pleaser to this day, but you’d be hard pressed to find anyone right now that would die on the hill of it being their favourite single-player racing experience. It’s also got some of the deepest, impenetrable lore in any medium known to the human race - why exactly is Marty the Thwomp locked up here?

Blast Corps - Nintendo 64, February 28th

February’s position as most boring month of the year is shaken up a bit by having a uniquely designed Rare game slammed into its 28-day long face. Blast Corps is the puzzle-action game where you take control of several vehicles to destroy homes and buildings in order to prevent a nuclear warhead exploding in the coolest incarnation of Cold War politicking ever seen in a video game. Calling Blast Corps a “hidden gem” these days is like calling Celeste a hidden gem - it impresses nobody and makes you look like a dick.

Turok: Dinosaur Hunter - Nintendo 64, March 4th

The N64 was home to a surprisingly large number of above-average shooters despite its muddy graphics and small cartridge space - Turok is one of these, a great FPS game where you shoot the SHIT out of dinosaurs. Brett Atwood of Billboard said it was like Doom and Tomb Raider mixed - Doom Raider, if you will. I say it isn’t - there’s no demons, and there’s no polygonal breasts to poke dinosaurs’ eyes out with!

Castlevania: Symphony of the Night - Sony PlayStation, March 20th

What is a retrospective? A miserable little pile of opinions. I’ve only recently played through SotN for the very first time on a TOTALLY LEGITIMATE copy with a CRT filter. Bloody good (geddit?) game, that takes the repetition of its predecessors, improves on it in basically every conceivable way, and combines it with special effects and graphics that even 23 years later had me going “ooh, that looks quite good!” Symphony’s music and audio design are wonderfully paired with a deeply enjoyable experience that’ll have you saying “mm, maybe just one more room?”

Tekken 3 - Sony PlayStation, March 20th

Also releasing from the Land of the Rising Sun that day was Tekken 3, which many believe is still one of the best fighters ever made. Tekken 3′s combat is so fast and responsive that it’s better than some games made today. T3 is also the best and easiest way to knock seven shades of absolute shite out of your friends without risking a massive head injury or a trip to the headmaster’s office... where you could also challenge him, but only if he plays as my favourite Not-Guile-or-Ken character in gaming, Paul.

Sonic Jam - Sega Saturn, June 20th

The moment Sega realised that re-packaging old Mega Drive games would net them serious cash - although unlike later collections, this is a strictly Sonic affair, and has a neat little 3D world to run around in as a sort of hub world. Sonic X-Treme proved that Sonic Team would have to work hard at getting the fastest thing alive into 3D space properly: Jam is the sort of test ground for it too. It features some genuinely good emulation work for 1997, although it’s basically the gaming equivalent of going round to your grandparents at Christmas only for them to give you the exact same gifts you got in 1991, 1992 and 1994 but wrapped in a bow to make you think it’s different. What are you lookin’ at, you little blue devil?

Star Fox 64 - Nintendo 64, June 30th

So there’s this German company, right, called StarVox. Nintendo look at Europe and say “shit, we don’t want another lawsuit... after all, we’ve done three this year!”. So they give us in the PAL region the exciting title of Lylat Wars which as far as I know means absolutely fucking nothing in the context of the game. They’re still called Star Fox in-game too so what was the point? Anyway, fun 3D shooter with graphics that’ll make you do a barrel roll off the sofa and onto the power button to make the brown and green blurs a little easier on the eyes. Hello 2007, I’ve come back to make old references with you!

Carmageddon - Windows, July 30th

The game so scary it was BANNED in the UK! More like the game so fucking shit it was banned. Carmageddon is so deeply boring to play on PC that I can only imagine that Stainless Games made it tasteless by 90s standards simply to ramp up demand - much like another game we’ll be covering soon.

Herc’s Adventures - Sony PlayStation, July 31st

“And they said Kratos was the best hero? Shish... they got it wrong, sister! Hercules is clearly better... he even has a coconut weapon.” A surprisingly fun overhead action game that most people only know for... well, I’ll just embed it.

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Mega Man X4 - Sony Playstation, August 1st

A few years ago I tried playing every Mega Man game there is - I gave up at X3 because I was getting bored. Even still, Mega Man bores me - but at least the level design is good. Stay away from the Windows port. Pictured: me in the background yawning.

GoldenEye 007 - Nintendo 64, August 25th

The name’s Intro. Overused intro which I also managed to fuck up twice through the deeply editable medium of text. GoldenEye is like the Seinfeld of console shooters - playing it nowadays you’re unlikely to be amazed but holy shit there’s some absolute greatness in this game. Every sound and every piece of music in GoldenEye is permanently seared into my brain - sometimes I’ll just hear Facility or Frigate in my head alongside the door opening sound and the gentle PEW of the PP7. I mean come on, fucking listen to this and tell me Grant Kirkhope isn’t cool as all hell.

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LEGO Island - Windows, September 26th

The first open world experience I ever had was LEGO Island. It’s still quite good today, utterly deranged animation from the likes of the Infomaniac and Brickster - a cautionary tale for children that giving pizza to high-profile criminals is disastrous for the human LEGO race.

Fallout - Windows, October 10th

War never changes, but franchises do. Fallout’s legendary status in the industry is exemplified in how different it feels. Yes, we had the game Wasteland nine years prior, but until September 97 there was nothing quite like Fallout. From the chilling introduction sequence showing the ruins of the United States to the tragic ending, Fallout is an exercise in pure human misery with the brightest spots of hope it can possibly muster thrown in for good measure. What begins as a tedious isometric point-and-click RPG ends as a minigun-wielding power fantasy, before your entire worth is stripped from you at the finish line. You have 500 days to find a water chip before it’s too late, but you’re constantly being fought by terrifying Super Mutants, irradiated animals, and the biggest monster of all - humanity. See what I did there? If anything, humanity in Fallout’s setting would be the greatest unifying force possible against the horror of the outside world. But how is it? It’s dull, it’s sluggish, and it’s really hard to get into even if you’re already a fan - but push through that and it’s worthwhile to see exactly how far the series got before Todd Howard said “eh fuck it” and had the whole thing dipped into an FEV vat.

Grand Theft Auto - Sony PlayStation, October 21st

To put it simply, the first in the GTA series is now nothing but a novelty. It has an irritating camera, wonky controls, poor graphics and deeply repetitive gameplay. But thank fuck it exists, because without it the Rockstar story may have been very different indeed. It’s quintessential cops and robbers gameplay, spanning across Liberty City, Vice City and San Andreas in one game, but with maps so far removed from their modern incarnations they may as well be named “Not New York, Possibly Bristol and Orange Town”. People really fucking hated Hare Krishnas in the 20th Century, didn’t they?

Crash Bandicoot 2: Cortex Strikes Back - Sony PlayStation, October 31

A hard one to talk about, honestly - it’s more Crash and better than the first one. It looks great, and Crash controls so well compared to his first outing. It’ll also keep you playing for 100%, fiendishly addictive and unashamedly difficult. Had a weird cover that moved with your head.

PaRappa the Rapper - Sony PlayStation, November 17th

Type type type the words into the box! (Type, type, type - uh oh - the box?)

PaRappa is a gorgeously stylised rhythm game about rapping to steal the heart of the girl of your dreams - which involves learning karate, getting your driver’s license, selling bottle caps and frogs, making a cake, desperately trying not to shit yourself, and finally performing live on stage. Every one of its segments is so well-produced that they’d genuinely sell like ghost cookies in this era of shite rap. Notable for producing the greatest Jay-Z backing track ever made.

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Sonic R - Sega Saturn, November 18th

Sonic R is absolutely FINE with vibrant textures, interesting levels, neat gimmicks and decent controls. But I’m gonna talk about its fucking AWESOME soundtrack by Richard Jacques and T.J. Davis, an eclectic mix of Europop and New Jack Swing - even thinking about it is bringing tears of absolute joy to my eyes hearing Super Sonic Racing in my head. You’ve got the main theme, Living in the City, Can You Feel the Sunshine, Back in Time, Diamond in the Sky, Work It Out and Number One - all of these are absolute club bangers and genuinely wouldn’t be out of place in a 90s disco.

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Tomb Raider II - Sony PlayStation, November 18th

Lara Croft returns to single-handedly endanger every species on Earth. TR2 is really good, the exploration and puzzle-solving aspects of the first game expanded upon here and the gunplay remaining just as punchy. Lara’s got a fully-functioning ponytail which absolutely boggles the fucking mind - a lot of work went into Lara’s hair for the 2013 reboot, so I can’t imagine the amount of man hours it took to get fluid(ish, come on, it’s the PS1 we’re talking about) hair movements in 1997.

And really, that’s all I played from 1997. I’ve left out big hitters like Quake II, Gran Turismo and Diddy Kong Racing, but I simply haven’t formed an opinion on them yet. Maybe in a future post.

Thanks for reading.

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luimnigh · 5 years

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Remnant doesn’t use the Gregorian Calendar

No, seriously.

I believe that Remnant does not use the Gregorian Calendar, the calendar system that we use in the Western World today. I believe instead that it uses a modified version of the Julian Calendar, called the Gaelic Calendar.

I believe this is supported both by evidence in the text of the show, by evidence in support materials that have been confirmed to be canonical, and by the fact that it fits thematically into RWBY.

So let’s break this theory down into four parts.

Part 1: A Brief History of Time

The Calendar currently in use in the Western World is the Gregorian Calendar, named after Pope Gregory XIII, who instituted this reform across the Catholic world in 1582. The reason why the Pope changed the calendar is that the previous Calendar, the Julian Calendar, had made the assumption that the year was exactly 365.25 days long. In actuality, it’s 365.2422.

Now, this doesn’t seem like much a difference (especially since the Julian Calendar was introduced in 46 BCE), but by the time Gregory got around to changing things, the Julian Calendar was off by ten days. This was upsetting Gregory because Easter was now happening a week earlier than it should have been, and this was the sort of thing that weighed on the mind of God’s right-hand-man.

Now, this change didn’t really change much. The clocks jumped forward ten days in October 1582, and the rules around Leap Years were changed. The Julian Calendar prescribed that Leap Years happen every four years. Gregory changed that to “every four years, unless the year ends in 00 and is not divisible by 400”. So while the year 2000 was a Leap Year, the year 1900 wasn’t and neither will the year 2100.

This gave the Gregorian Calendar a year length of 365.2425, and it was declared “close enough”. We only lose one day every 3,030 years, rather than the Julian Calendar’s day-loss of one day every 128 years. That’s a major improvement by any measurement.

So what the hell does this have to do with RWBY?

Part 2: Happy BirthdayWeen!

Ruby’s birthday is October 31st, Halloween. In the RWBY Chibi episode “Happy BirthdayWeen”, the date is explicitly referred to as both October 31st and Halloween, and Miles Luna later confirmed that was canon, despite the events of RWBY Chibi being non-canonical.

However, three months after the airing of “Happy BirthdayWeen”, the episode “Nondescript Holiday Spectacular” aired, featuring the Chibi version of our heroes celebrating “Nondescript Winter Holiday”.

Now, while RWBY Chibi is non-canonical, it does make use of canonical information. For example, in the episode “Nefarious Dreams”, it reveals that Emerald sees Cinder as a mother figure, which Mercury confirmed four months later in Volume 6, Chapter 9.

So, the question I ask you is: Why can RWBY Chibi refer to Halloween as “Halloween”, but has to use “Nondescript Winter Holiday” instead of naming a December Holiday, real or imagined?

I believe that this is because Halloween is actually celebrated on Remnant, but a December Holiday is not. And Halloween is very important to the Gaelic Calendar.

Part 3: This Is Halloween

Halloween, despite taking it’s current name from the consecutive Western Christian Feast Day “All Hallow’s Day”, did not start as a Christian festival. Instead, it derives from the ancient Gaelic festival of Samhain, which included many of the same customs as modern Halloween. Bonfires, Apple Bobbing, going from house-to-house in costume and demanding food, Jack-o’-lanterns (made from turnips rather than pumpkins), the works.

It was believed that this was a liminal time, where the walls of the world of the living and the world of the dead where at their weakest. Food was placed out to invite the spirits of the family’s dead relatives in, while masks were worn to scare evil spirits off. There’s honestly some striking similarities to the Mexican custom of Dia De Muertos.

But it wasn’t just a celebration of the dead.

See, the Celtic (and thus Gaelic) day was recorded by Roman historians to be a little different than what we would consider a day to be. The day started at sunset rather than sunrise or midnight, with the “dark half” of the day occuring before the “light half”. Similarly, the Celtic year was divided into a “dark half” and a “light half”.

It is believed that Samhain was a celebration of the end of one year, and the beginning of the next. It was “Celtic New Years”, and additionally the end of the Autumn (Fall) Season and the beginning of the Winter Season. This carried over into the Gaelic Calendar, until the switch to the Gregorian Calendar.

(And yeah, the Gaelic Calendar specifically marks the seasons as sets of three months. February 1st to April 30th is Spring, May 1st to July 31st is Summer, August 1st to October 31st is Fall, and November 1st to January 31st is Winter. This is how the seasons are still taught in Irish schools. This is how I learned the seasons. Let me tell you, it was a culture shock to find out how Americans did it.)

Part Four: The Text and the Themes

So, great idea, but where’s the proof?

Well, I could point you towards the Tale of the Four Maidens. Just like the Gaelic Calendar, it begins with Winter, then Spring, the Summer, and ends with Fall. This is the order used in both the telling by Pyrrha, and the World of Remnant narrated by Ozpin. It’s even the order Pyrrha uses when listing off the seasons at the end of the tale.

Normally, when naming the seasons, you’d say “Spring, Summer, Fall, Winter”. It feels significant to me that RWBY changes the order like that.

I could also point you towards the thematic implications. It’s been said that the Beacon Arc is more a prologue to our heroes’ journey, that the story truly begins at the end of Volume 3 when Team RNJR sets off to Haven. This is symbolized in the story by the transition from Fall into Winter, the transition from one year into the next in the Gaelic Calendar. In fact, due to the fact that Taiyang is bringing Ruby breakfast in bed when he finds her letter, I personally believe that Ruby set off towards Haven on her birthday, October 31st.

Or the fact Fall symbolism is used throughout Volume 3 to symbolise an ending, the literal “fall” of our heroes and Beacon itself. Fall is the time when the leaves die, when animals hibernate, when the crop is reaped and the livestock slaughtered to prepare for the Winter months where nothing grows. Even both of our Fall Maidens, Amber and Cinder, have names that signify death in some way. Cinders are the last remnants of a fire, all that’s left after even the embers have died. Meanwhile, Amber is known as a substance that trapped, killed and preserved small creatures and insects. When Fall finally becomes Winter in the show, it’s a new beginning.

But instead of pointing you towards all that stuff, I’m just going to point you to Volume 2, Chapter 1. In which Ruby says that the Vytal Festival Tournament will be held, and I quote, “at the end of the year”.

The Vytal Tournament very clearly takes place in Fall, rather than the expected Winter (for the Gregorian Calendar year), Summer (for the Western Academic year) or Spring (for the Japanese Academic year, which I personally believe fits RWBY’s timeline best). So the end of the year clearly takes place in Fall. Late Fall, even, as it begins to snow not long after the Festival ends prematurely.

And after all, what better time to hold a festival dedicated to celebrating the end of a war than in the run-up to a celebration of the dead?

Conclusion

In conclusion, due to the evidence the show and supporting materials present, I believe that Remnant follows the Gaelic Calendar and that, as a result, Ruby’s birthday of Halloween is also Remnant’s New Year’s Eve.

Thank you for taking the time to read this, I hope I’ve come across as coherent and convincing.

#rwby #rwby6 #rwby3 #rwby2 #volumes as seasons?#calendar nerdery #i wasn't kidding at the end of my last meta post #yes i have a mild bias because i'm irish #but this makes sense #right?#i learned how to use picture

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ronancegayass · 5 years

Note

Flower Asks: all of them >:3€ (forgive me)

(this is so many omg but I’ll allow it only bc i love u)

Alisons: Sexuality?

Gay af (ace lesbean)

Amaranth: Pronouns/Gender?

Waman (she/they)

Amaryllis: Birthday?

November 2nd

Anemone: Favorite flower?

Funnily enough anemones are one of my favs but i think my top favs are chrysanthemums and morning glories but I really love many flowers and flowers in general

Angelonia: Favorite t.v. show?

As of right now, stranger things duh

Arum-Lily: What’s the farthest you’d go for a stranger?

Like favors or? I mean I really do try to be a kind and helpful person but if I don’t know somebody or haven’t at least seen them a couple times before I usually don’t do much bc of anxiety

Aster: What’s one of your favorite quotes?

"The extraordinary is in what we do, not who we are.” Lara Croft mostly bc I cant think of anything else right now and that stuck with me

Aubrieta: Favorite drink?

Like a really good cup of black tea with cream and sugar or sweet tea

Baby’s Breath: Would you kiss the last person you kissed again?

Never been kissed before but I definitely have someone in mind I would kiss ;3

Balsam Fir: Have you ever been in love?

Hell yeah I am right now and I don’t think I ever have been before now

Baneberries: Favorite song?

Oh hard question... currently really digging We Fell In Love in October by Girl in Red

Basket of Gold: Describe your family.

My family is supportive (for the most part) and very loving, even if they express love in weird ways sometimes. We also like to joke around a lot and make fun of each other but in a good way? Like we all have a good time mostly and I get along better with everyone since I started college

Beebalm: Do you have a best friend? Who is it?

My girlfriend is my best friend uwu I also have a lot of good friends but yeah

Begonia: Favorite color?

Purble but specifically like a pastel purple and purples that lean more towards blue than pink

Bellflower: Favorite animal?

Lynx! I love so many animals tho and I also like many cats and domestic cats in general

Bergenia: Are you a morning or night person?

Night!

Black-Eyed Susan: If you could be any animal for a day, what would it be?

Probably would love to just be a loved house cat who gets to lay in front of the fire all day or a lynx bc i love them

Bloodroots: When you were a kid, what did you want to be when you grew up?

A veterinarian (or a special agent lmao)! I also still plan on being a vet tho even tho I get discouraged at least once a month

Bluemink: What are your thoughts on children?

I mean I like kids and I was a camp counselor for a summer, but I dont really want any of my own

Blazing Stars: What are you afraid of? Is there a reason why?

Oh god so many things.. Biggest thing would maybe be death/dying? Like if i think about it too much like the possibility of there just being nothing after death freaks me out. That and throwing up/nausea

Borage: Give a random fact about your childhood.

I played soccer and then I was a competitive swimmer so i was kind of an athlete? even tho i hated sports

Bugleherb: How would you spend your last day on Earth?

I think I would like to go to waffle house, have the perfect cup of tea, spend lots of time with my loved ones and pet my kitties, play video games with my gf, and sit under a tree in the mountains preferably on a warmer day in the fall and watch the sunset

Buttercup: Relationship Status?

Very happily taken

Camelia: If you could visit anywhere, where would you want to go?

Always wanted to visit Norway

Candytufts: When do you feel most loved?

Really big long hugs, good morning or goodnight messages, and I also really love cards

Canna: Do you have any tattoos?

I have 6

Canterbury Bells: Do you have any piercings?

Yup! I have an industrial, orbital, and 3 earlobe piercings

California Poppy: Height?

5′2 or maybe a little less

Cardinal Flower: Do you believe in ghosts?

Yeah I think so, but I do also get freaked out easily lmao

Carnation: What are you currently wearing?

Red flannel, jeans, fuzzy socks, and big dyke boots

Catnip: Have you ever slept with a nightlight?

Yeah I did for a long time and I still sometimes sleep with one or like a bathroom light on if Im sleeping by myself in a new place

Chives: Who was the last person you hugged?

Either my mom or my dad I dont remember technically who was last bc my parents are visiting me at college

Chrysanthemum: Who’s the last person you kissed?

Again, never kissed or been kissed! but maybe soon... :0

Cock’s Comb: Favorite font?

Font? I like the font in Night in the Woods?

Columbine: Are you tired?

Pretty much always either sleepy or tired lol

Common Boneset: What are you looking forward to?

Christmas, getting to see my gf again, and Magfest!

Coneflower: Dream job?

Like a veterinarian but having my own practice and also being able to take in injured wildlife if possible

Crane’s-Bill: Introvert or extrovert?

Introvert for sure

Crocus: Have you ever been in love?

Oh repeat question, hell yes

Crown Imperial: What’s the farthest you would go for someone you care about?

Depends what it is but I would go pretty far for somebody I care about and Im also a crazy person and would drive/travel no matter what distance for someone I love

Cyclamen: Did you have a favorite stuffed animal as a child? What was it?

Yup! I had a ballerina bunny, named Bunny because I was very creative and I still have her

Daffodil: What’s your zodiac sign?

Scorpio

Dahlia: Have you done anything worth remembering?

I think so? I did a lot of cool stuff with my GS troop like our bronze award project and going ziplining and to sliding rock.

Daisy: What do you feel is your greatest accomplishment?

My GS gold award for sure, that shit was hard work and stressful af

Daylily: What would you do if your parents didn’t like your partner(s)?

Umm??? I would tell my dad to eat shit and die and I cant imagine my mom being anything but sweet and supportive so I dont even know

Dendrobium: Who is the last person that you said “I love you” to?

You! This morning uwu

False Goat’s Beard: What is something you are good at?

uhh Im pretty good at making sense of stuff in my science labs and reasoning and im sometimes good at art? I feel like I do traditional better but Im getting better at digital

Foxgloves: What’s something you’re bad at?

bad at not being impulsive sometimes and bad at dead by daylight

Freesia: What are three good things that have happened in the past month?

a little over a month but officially got a girlfriend who i love very much, my gf came down to visit and we got to chill on the mountains together, and I had a pretty nice birthday

Garden Cosmos: How was your day today?

Good! Got breakfast at a diner with my parents and got coffee and a donut at my fav coffee shop so thats all i really need in life tbh

Gardenia: Are you happy with where you’re at in your life?

Yeah Im happy even tho Im stressed with school at times

Gladiolus: What is something you hope to do in the next year or two?

Get a job after graduation and hopefully get into vet school on the first or second try

Glory-of-the-Snow: What are ten things that make you happy/you’re grateful to have in your life?

My kitty, mom, wonderful gf, sister, dead by daylight, heated blanket, apartment, waffle house, my sisters kitty, and my dog

Heliotropium: What helps you calm down when you feel stressed?

Donuts, coffee or tea, blankets, video games, and loud music

Hellebore: How do you show affection?

Hmm... I really like to draw art for those i love, tell them how much i love them even though i can be bad with words, and i just try to spend a lot of time with the people I care about no matter what we are doing

Hoary Stock: What are you proudest of?

uhhh trying to open up more? and Im really proud of my gf

Hollyhock: Describe your ideal day.

Going to waffle house. Go to a mountain and hike a little, sit on the top with girlfriend. Admire beauty of mountain countryside. Admire beauty of girlfriend while they admire the beauty of the mountain. Then warm up together with hot chocolate and play video games

Hyacinth: What do you like to do in your free time?

I like to doodle and do the arts, play video games, and I like to bake sometimes

Hydrangea: How long have you known your best friend? How did you meet them?

uuuuuuh I have a good friend I’ve known since kindergarten or first grade when I first moved to where I currently live

Irises: Who can you talk to about (almost) everything?

My gf uwu and my mem

Laceleaf: How many friends do you have?

probably like less than 10

Lantanas: What’s the best compliment you’ve ever received?

I think its really cute especially when you compliment my laugh

Larkspur: What do you think of yourself?

??? I think I am an okay person? And I try to be a good person and be kind and polite to people

Lavender: What’s your favorite thing about yourself?

Umm... I mean I like that Im kind? and Im not fake and I try to be a good person

Leather Flower: What’s your least favorite thing about yourself?

I hate that I procrastinate and that I can get frustrated easily at myself and at situations like crowds and traffic

Lilac: What’s something you liked to do as a child?

I liked to play ‘restaurant’ with my sister with our littlest pet shops

Lily: Who was your best friend when you were a kid?

I had a really great best friend named Rachel :c

Lily of the Incas: What is something you still feel guilty for?

Losing a lot of friends and for being distant for a long time

Lily of the Nile: What is something you feel guilty for that you shouldn’t feel guilty about?

Cutting off a friend that was bad for my mental health and who didnt treat me well even though we were best friends for a long time

Lupine: What does your name mean? Why is that your name?

My name is literally my parents ship name... like they even told me they chose my name by putting their names together lmao but I mean I like my name so i guess its okay..

Marigold: Where did you grow up? Tell us about it.

Small town in new jersey when I was really, it was nice and family was closer. Then we moved and that was difficult but I ended up adjusting and it was good, had a decent amount of friends and the schools i went to were good

Morning Glory: What was your bedroom like growing up?

For a long time I shared a room with my sister and we had a bunkbed and I had the top bunk of course, when we moved out of the apartment and into a house I got my own room and it was baby blue only because I told my dad that no, I didnt want a fuckin pink room and that was a whole thing lmao

Mugworts: What was it like for you as a teenager? Did you enjoy your teenage years?

It was good? but also sucked a lot. I had a lot of issues with my mental health and struggled for a long while with something. I was bullied and stuff at home wasnt always that great. And i got outed so that was fun. Other than that I enjoyed swimming competitively and I got into art

Norwegian Angelica: Tell us about your mom.

I love my mom!! she is the most Mom mom and is so sweet and always there for me. She helps me out so much with so many things and I just love my mom so much

Onions: Tell about your dad.

I mean I love my dad? And hes better than he used to be, but he still doesnt help with shit and irritates me a lot.

Orchid: Tell about your grandparents.

I never got to know my grandfather on my moms side bc he passed away a few months before i was born and I sort of knew my grandmother but she lived far away and passed away 10 years ago. I usually see my gramma on my dads side the most and I try to visit often and help her out with stuff and I love her even though she can be a bit... racist and shit.. and I sometimes see my grandpa and step grandma but they can be strict about weird shit and always ask a lot of uncomfortable questions

Pansy: What was your most memorable birthday? What made it be so memorable?

I dont really do much on my birthdays? Ive had a lot of nice birthdays and it usually involves going out to dinner or having a nice dinner at home and having birthday cake and playing games like jenga or yahtzee.

Peony: What was your first job?

I did some petsitting for a while but my first real job was being a camp counselor/tower belayer/lifeguard at a girl scout camp

Petunia: If you’re in a relationship, how did you meet your partner(s)?

Met online after following them for a long time and drawing some arts for them, but didnt really start chatting until stranger things 3 came out bc I saw they had just watched it. Didnt meet irl until fursonacon and I just remember seeing them walking up to my car when I got there and just being like .... oh no. I had already had a crush but at that point I was just heart eyes

Pincushion: How do you deal with pain?

Its a little fucked up but depending on the type of physical pain I like it? Like getting tattoos and stuff.. emotional/mental I just curl up in blankets and listen to sad music lol

Pink: Where is home?

I feel like I have many homes? I feel really at home in the mountains, at home with my family, and when Im with my girlfriend

Plantain Lilies: If you could go back in time, what is one thing you would stop/change?

Every event no matter how shitty shaped me into who i am today and Im pretty content and lucky with what I have today so maybe nothing?

Prairie Gentian: Who is someone you look up to? Describe them.

My GS leader Miss Kristin. So incredibly kind and outgoing and just willing to do whatever she can to help others. Shes so adventurous and outgoing and made my gs troop so amazing. She is such a wonderful lady and shes basically like another mom to me.

Primrose: Describe your ideal life.

To be with my SO in a nice cabin in the mountains with a nice fireplace. Its cozy and we have pets (especially kitties but also maybe a dog and chickens and such) and life is okay and we’re happy

Rhodendron: What is something you used to believe in as a child?

God and Santa Claus (i was so heartbroken (over santa not God lmao))

Ricinus: Who’s the most important in your life?

My girlfriend and my mom

Rose: What’s your favorite sound?

My gfs voice and their laugh c: and I also really like the sound of thunderstorms and rain

Rosemallows: What’s your favorite memory?

Sage: What’s your least favorite memory?

Snapdragon: At this moment, what do you want?

To see my gf again and for winter break to just be here already I am so done with school lol

St. John’s Wort: Is it easy or difficult for you to express how you feel about things?

Difficult? I try really hard to express how I feel but I usually mess up and I get anxious but I try my best lol

Sunflower: What is something you don’t want to imagine life without?

Any of my loved ones and my cat

Sweet Pea: How much sleep did you get last night?

I wish I got more sleep but it was an okay amount

Tickseed: What’s your main reason to get up every morning?

Good morning texts from my gf and my gf in general

Touch-Me-Not: How do you feel about your current job?

I dont currently have a job but I occasionally do art commissions which is usually fun and gives me something to do

Transvaal Daisy: What’s your favorite item of clothing?

Any of my flannels and my leather jacket (also not mine but my gfs hoodie they gave to me to borrow)

Tropical White Morning Glory: Describe your aesthetic.

mountains, cabins, flowers, fall, flannel, small coffee shops, pastels

Tulip: What would be the best present to get you?

Im not one to be picky about gifts? I just love anything that someone put some thought into and thought I would like or reminded them of me but i feel bad if it was something expensive or anything lol

Vervain: What’s stressing you out most right now?

Final exams and graduation

Wisteria: How many books have you read in the past few months? What were they called?

0 lmao I used to read a shit ton but Ive been picky about what books I want to read lately

Wolf’s Bane: Where do you want to be in life this time next year?

Working towards applying to vet school and maybe thinking about moving out depending on a lot of things.

Yarrow: Do you know what vore is?

Unfortunately

Zinnia: Give a random fact about yourself.

I like collecting pins, pennies, and postcards which is funny to me

(So in conclusion,,, I love my gf)

(wow that was long as hell and took forever but done!)

#long post #ask #sapphicfinalpam

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chloe-spade · 5 years

Text

iZombie Au: Sander Sides

You think your life would harder when you become an adult or get a job you hated the most?

The day my life went...south..for me and for everyone around me.

The day of a The Lake Washington Massacre...

I was a very known surgeon, doctor and nurse. I was very known for it.

Oh my name? My name is Virgil Dusk, a former loved doctor and a loving boyfriend to fiance to....

A brain-eating zombie....

"Sir?"

Virgil looked up at the saleswomen.

"Oh...sorry."Virgil muttered taking the purple die from the women's hand and quickly zoomed away, eyes avoiding every person who walked past him.

Virgil Dusk

28 years old

Has been a Zombie for 4 years straight

He still remembered that day like it was yesterday.

*4 years ago*

"Seeya Virge!"Some co-workers shouted as they aproched their cars.

"Hello, my dear chemically imbalance romance~!"A voice came in front of Virgil.

His fiance, Roman Delightful, his high school sweetheart to the end.

Virgil jumped and laughs."Roman!"

Roman held Virgil in his arms and gave him a tender kiss.

Virgil giggles and pushes him away."Ok,Ok! Are you ready for our date night."

"You bet."

"Hey, Virge! Wanna go to this sweet boat party?" Said Harold Johnson, Virge's co-worker, and a total party animal.

"Seriously? Uh...I'm not much of a party person let alone be being a extrovert in general..that's Roman."

"I think it's a great idea to celebrate your promotion of this amazing job."

Virgil sigh in defeat and kisses Roman's cheek."Wait for me when I get back?"

"Of course."

Virgil Smiles and follows Harold to the car and went off to the boat party.

But it wasn't what Virgil expected.

Virgil stared down at his cup of tea as he look at guys chugging on a weird drink and their eyes turns a deep red and growls left their mouths.

Virgil gasp and trembled as he saw the horrifying imagery as people's skulls opens ans brains were eaten.

Virgil ran off the boat ignoring his badly scratched arm and jumped into the ocean like it was no tomorrow for him.

As Virgil's eyes open, he could only see yellow and he burst his open his bag he was surprisingly in and coughs up the water he gulped.

He looked around and see a scared ambulance men running as fast as he could.

Once I woke up...I suddenly felt the urge to eat... brains....

It was an unexpected urge...but I felt like I needed it...more then anything..

*Now*

Virgil gets up from his bed and groans as the his night was another sleepless one.

He gets up to change to a nice black buttoned shirt and his normal black and purple knitted jacket, grabbing his headphones and phone and trotted to the kitchen, greetings by an unexpected hug.

"Oh, Virgil, why you look...oddly cute as ever." Mrs. Dusk cooed."And I like the purple aesthetic you did with your hair. It's worked."

Virgil cracked info a small smile.

"Hey, kiddo!" greeted his roommate and bestie since high school, Patton.

Patton

31 years old

Virgil's bestest friend/roommate

"Hey, Pat."He said with a smile.

Patton is unaware of Virgil's newly zombie habits, and Virgil prefers to keep it that way cause how fragile Patton is.

"Oh, got to get to work. Also, make sure to pick up my costume for fhd Halloween expo tonight, I'd hate to be there without a costume.

"I'm just happy that you're participating."Thomas, Virgil's younger brother, said with his usual goofy smiles that Virge loved.

"I'm glad to be with the-!?"

"There for the family?"

Virgil Blushes and looks up to see Roman."Come on, it'll at least help us to get what we lost?"

Virgil chuckles."Sure thing."

Roman Delightful

30 years old

Virgil's ex-fiance to current boyfriend.

It's weird to reunite a spark with Roman after I broke things off our of fear but he was to determined to get me back so I let him have a second chance so he won't stop nagging me..

"But seriously, I need to get to work.", Virgil said, leaving the house and walks to the Police Department at the 6th floor at the city's morgue.

"You're lucky to be on time, Virgil."Said a harsh gone, placing the body on the table.

"Nice to see you too, Logan."

Logan Smith

Age 37

Virgil's boss and an extremely smart man

Virgil chuckles and puts in his labcoat and walks down.

"I am sorry for that tone but I am going to be a little more softer."

Virgil worked in Medical PhD for the last 2 years so he can the brains to eat.

"Hey, we just got a body!"Said the cops.

"Duty calls." Virgil shrugs and walks, along with Logan to the park where a women was taken to the hospital.

"Ohh...my god, she's smells..." Virgil gagged and looks away.

"Melissa Margolis, age 55, married with two kids, one's moved away to Canada for college and one is a high school student, known for her smart personality. She's a so called soccer mom.."

"According to her completion, she has been dead for at least 10 hours before someone discovering her inside that Roseburg bush."

"Huh.."

"It's a rare bush."

"She loves roses and planted this specific one here."Said Mr. Margolis."This women found her."

Virgil and Logan starred at the women and gasp.

"Juliet Farin...no thank you."

"We have a no-such-luck relationship.."

Virgil scoffed."The thing is that she tried to ruin me and my boyfriend's relationship..when we got back together, and she went crazy on me."

Urusla sighs."Hope your physic powers help you."

*back in the morgue*

"I'm not staying she had the right idea...she just showed a bit craziness."

"Why is she specifically after you?"Urusla asked

Urusla

29 years old

Homicide officer for 5 years.

When I broke things off with Roman, she hooked up with him and used him for money basically. The reason she broke things off with him was because the stuff Roman bought were my standard of favorite things. She didn't like it. And broke up with him and now he's back with me and she hates it.

"Cheers for a trying soccer mom..and may the odds of losing my voice in my favor.." Virgil prayed and took a bit of his brain egg omulet.

"Didn't think you pray of being a mom.."

"That's Patton's job."

"True."

As soon as I gulped it down i felt an urge to run to Roman and give him a big hug and kiss for missing him to much. She's a perfect wife too.

*Next day*

"So, where were you around 2:30 to 3:00."Urusla asked Keith Margolis, hef husband who was sitting next to the table in front of them.

"At work, I usually work at 6am to 7:45pm."

"Poor thing...you must be very exhausted."Virgil whines, his hands trembling.

She has major anxiety... I can go with this

"That's what Melissa would say, always feel bad for me at every turn. Her anxiety was pretty bad, it wasn't like a disorder or anything it just...it can lead to a certain paranoia phase she would have..it would annoy a few, like Hailey, our daughter before she left fof college, but soon we got used to it cause we love her."

Urusla groans."So she was very heighted?"

"Yes, very so."

The conversation was interuppted by a huge bang by a accidental coffee spillage to the wall.

That's when Virgil's first vision in this brain started.

*The Vision*

Keith angry banged the table pointing his finger at Melissa.

"If this doesn't end, I can and I will go back to my mistress to get away from you!!"

*vision ends*

Virgil gasp as he looks around.

"You had a mistress?"

Kieth stopped his talking immediately.

"Did you or did you not?" Virgil ordered angrily.

"Yes! I did have a mistress, it was because I got so tired of her worry I left the house. And met Isabel."

"Can we call her in?"Urusla asked, her arms folding."You got your alibi."

A few minutes, Isabel walked in to the room, and sat down, glaring at Virgil."I heard about you, boyfriend kisser."

"You accidentally kiss a guy in school and you're new name is "Boyfriend Kisser"..."Virgil sighed.

"Where were you at the time at the murder."

"Talking to Hailey, she was visiting my place since we had a... special bond...Hailey never got along with Melissa, she would tell me, Melissa was a very strict mom, and never did things that she didn't approve of Hailey of doing. That was unfair cause when Jennifer was born, she let her do anything she wanted. Because Jennifer was a sporty type like her, adventurous, snarky too. So Hailey was glad to get out of state to college."

"So you and Hailey both can prove it."

"Yes."

Virgil looked to see Logan mentioning him to leave the room.

Virgil got up and went to Logan.

"I found something... Intriguing in her jacket. Divorce papers, 2 weeks delivered before the murder."

"So Keith was planning to divorce her anyway."

"Yes, and I also found out that they got married in October 29, somewhere in the 1998s, And look is born after."

"Hailey Margolis, born November 5th, 1998."

"So?"

"In your terms, you might say, she 'baby-trapped' him."

"And probably did it again when it came to Jennifer. She was processive of him.."

"He had motive." Urusla said behind them."If she did those things, that means..."

"There's more."Logan added."Melissa was granted 1,500,000 grand from him. Keith is wealthy, from a wealthy background so it's no surprise that..."

"A gold-digger?"Patton interuppted."You forgot your lunch, Logan."

"I told you, you don't have to, Pat."

"Well I wanted to."

*In a vision*

Hailey looked up from her book in an angry matter."What if you wanted to!? You realized you out dad in a lot of misery! He had to drop everything cause of us!"

*Vision ends*

"She wanted to do that. She wanted to baby trap Keith...and that causes him to go angry and find a witness."

"Isabel mentioned that her and Keith met on January, little more than 5 month ago. And according to her apparence, she's pregnancy. Turns out he was planning to raise the baby with her and leave the family."

"So she sent the divorce papers but got him back."

*Hailey's interrogation*

"Isabel said you were with her for the last few hours of your mother's murder."

"I was. I was overly excited to be her new daughter since Dad found the divorce papers. That's when we got a call from Jennifer saying that we both rot in hell."

"So Jennifer hated Isabel."

"Dearly with all her heart. She always says that Isabel ruined the family, but in reality, it was mom. She baby trapped him with me and his life was screwed."

"And when was this phone call?"

"Around 2:54 to 3:00, she kept ranting."

"The murder weapon wasn't present. She was poisoned." Logan said, from behind Virgil.

"We couldn't identity it. But we knew it was dangerous and the name is so Russian I can't even say it. But it was used for tea and other liquids."

"Isabel did used to work at a factory, for poisoning goods. She stopped once she became Pregnant..."

"It was a gift. So I accepted it and then one day I found it missing. Both Jennifer and Hailey were with me but Keith payed a visit and ..."

"Hs stole it and he used it on her coffee...she drinks it around 3:00, her coffee break.."

*The final interrogation*

"So, it wasn't easy to crack."

"It's was so."Virgil said, standing up."You stole Isabel's poison from her place and used it on her coffee, and then you gave it to her and took her to the park and saw her faint down as she drink her whole coffee, organs and brain stopped working and she was dead. This was so you didn't have to pay her for child support and the funds you owe her after the divorce."

"Exactly. She baby trapped me twice and you think I was gonna let that slide?! She ruined my life and my family's reputation as a whole cause she wanted me all to herself."

"Keith Margolis, you have the right to remain silent, anything you or say will be against you in court."

Something sparked inside me when I was said those words. It reminded me of me...when I was with Roman. I did kiss him accidentally but it wasn't a regret, like how Melissa fooled her husband. It was a need, but needs can be poisoning and some lead to unsatisfactory in a person. But there's was one thing I didn't regret? Going to that boat party. If I haven't gone, I would never learn anything about myself with the help of the brains I have eaten, I would never face myself to tell Logan about me being a zombie. And now I'm back to be with Roman again....so... somethings you may regret could be things you'd never regret cause who knows what impact it has on your life. Good or bad....

Virgil came home to find Roman.

"Welcome back."Roman greeted.

"Hey, can we talk...I've been thinking about...us, we've drifted since that boat party and now we're back together...so I don't regret being with you again cause it opens my eyes for the past year of us being together...it made me miss out on the things we...loved .. about each other and..."Virgil's voice started to break and Roman pulled him into a tight hug.

"I know you do...but since we dated... And now we're back to were we are..and now I've decided...to.."Roman picked out Virgil's old wedding ring out of his pocket."Thank we try again...for marriage?"

Virgil's tears couldn't stop rolling down and nods."Of course...I'd regret it if I did say no,.... I love you so much."

Roman pulls Virgil into a warm embrace and kisses his forehead and said,"No matter who you are, Zombie or human..I will love you no matter what..."

This took 5 hours....but I'm glad I did it!...but ouch..

But enjoy this little segment to my favorite show ever.

(if you wanna watch it, it's on Netflix)

#roman sanders #logan sanders #thomas sanders #sanders sides #virgil sanders #prinxiety #logicality #patton sanders #icey's izombie au

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frozenfallenuniverse · 6 years

Text

Town on the Border

This story is based on an oc my friend and I created together. It also fits october more than november but hey, inspiration is hell.

Thousands of adventurers come but few return. Some barely ended school before deciding to teach a millenia old demon how to play dead. Each one is someone’s child unknowingly going to the guillotine. The ones that come back aren’t that much better; their minds broken and the brightness in their eyes have lost the light they once had. Most are missing some body part, others come back with the little money they were able to gather while fleeing in terror, barely enough money to cover a night at the inn, none speak about whatever happened out there. The funny thing is before each adventure all those bright eyed kids ask the smith for something amazing. A “sword that never misses its mark” or “armor that will never fail me” and that old man can never say no. After all, he allowed his son to fall under the sirens call of adventure only to return in a cart dead. It was never something he was proud of but no matter what, he visits his son’s grave each and every day. Well, at least he says he does.

No matter the task or the difficulty, the smith always completes it within a day. Perfectly fitting armor, more durable than that of the finest dwarf crafts. Blades that can easily slice through the toughest flesh, metallic staffs far more effective than anything the magic college could produce and metal only the demon army can provide. The only thing that suggests the smiths handie work is the work’s warmth it exudes.

He spins stories for each of his works like how a blade sliced the arm off the nineteenth demon lord, how that bow blinded the forty-fifth, and how this plate set withstood the blows of the third. His white hair and dehydrated skin would make no one as young as the foolish adventurers believe a word of it, let alone those of adult age. He promises them they will return safe but few ever doe. At least, none of the adventurers who used one of his works do.

The townsfolk insist that he’s a great smith and he tries to make everyone he meets happier No one can think of a time when he wasn’t there. The elders insist he was smithing even back when they were in diapers. Others say that he helped found the town. Anyone who tries to ask him gets an almost rehearsed response.

“My son made this town and as his father, It's my job to stay here.” His usual jovial attitude drops off around the end. The strange thing is no one ever remembers him having a son, let alone a wife. When you’re a town this close to the demon lands, you can usually let a little oddity like that slide, however. There have been stories of some towns near the border with strange mutations in their livestock, children born with a godlike aptitude and crops growing larger than some demonfolk. Some say its a curse. The smith says its his fault.

Some people complain about nightmares on the border. The sound of dead soldiers crawling back home. Clanging metal bracing itself against walls, swords grating against cobble, animals screaming in the night. Every fortnight, people swear they see the spirits of lost adventurers wander into town. It got to such a point where no one, even adventurers, are allowed out. Cleric magic has no effect, blades can’t cut and they ignore anyone they pass. Better to let them pass on, says the smith every morning after it happens.

The bards that come through say its the most melancholy place they’ve been to but they can never place why. Most spells that mages try to cast fizzle out for no reason. Mapmakers say they’ll make a fortune adding this village to official kingdom maps but that’s happened hundreds of times within the last month alone. No blacksmiths or armorers try to visit the town and none of them can remember anyone with the smith’s name. I believe his name is his job. Smith is both what he does and all anyone knows about him.

I used to be like those adventurers. Full of hope and willing to risk a life to fight. Now, I’m a burned out writer who hardly can get a full page of this sent to anyone without being call crazy or living in the wilds. I tried fighting against the last demon king but something strange happened. One of my friends got a suit of armor from that Smith. Nice full suit of plate. I didn’t ask for anything and I’m still sitting here. My friend. Died. A massive demon smashed him against a wall. The sound of his bones being turned into his tomb won’t leave my nightmares. I pissed myself, as I think anyone would in that situation. The rest of my party fled but I was frozen with terror. My body refused to do anything but watch. I’m both hateful and grateful to that.

My friend’s corpse started moving about inhumanly. No one cast any form of necromancy or resurrection on him. Our cleric was already ripped in half by that monster. The monster ignored it and came closer to me. I screamed till my throat tore as what used to be my friend tore away at the monster with an axe. It saved my life but that… thing wasn’t my friend anymore. It was the shell of my friend and it walked towards where the king stood. I ran in the opposite direction and had nightmares each time I passed out from that point. I convinced myself that is what happens when you die in the demon kingdom. It took two weeks for me to realize something.

Remember how I said dead soldiers came every week? I was half right. I saw that creature that used to be my friend. He shambled to that smith’s house then disappeared into the basement or something. I couldn’t move that much. Hell, who am I kidding. After that whole thing, I became terrified of armor. I have trouble wearing anything thicker than winter clothes. I asked the smith the next day and he was no help.

“I didn’t see your friend at all and I don’t remember anyone coming near here last night.” I had a feeling he was speaking more bullshit than a snake oil salesman. I made the decision to… I guess avenge my friend by figuring out what happened to him. That shell would still have his insides there right?

I snuck into that basement the next night. Well, I tried to. The smith was waiting outside of it and just said one single thing to me as I walked in.

“Your nightmares will get worse.”

There wasn’t a secret about those. I got kicked out of the inn too many times to count. A cleric that passed through, and probably passed away, said they were night terrors which honestly fits better.

The slightly damp stone steps led to a small room with a locked door. I had half a mind to run up and grab a rock but the Smith already planted the damn key in my pocket. If I had my mind in a good place, I would have questioned it but dumb devotion makes it hard to think. Lock came off and I cracked open the door. I felt hundreds of eyes staring at me as I felt my skin crawl.

The air in there tastes used and my clothes became drenched in sweat before I knew it. It looked like an armory that was sorted by a five year old. Suits of armor were crumpled in one corner, like a mass grave from a war. Another corner had swords and blades interlaced into the most uncomfortable blanket known to man. Every other weapon or tool followed the same principle: separated into their type and mashed up in those piles. The feeling of something watching me kept entering my mind.

I left without a word. Wasn’t a reason to tell the guards that a blacksmith had a ton of armor and weapons weirdly set up in his basement. I settled down in town. Kept an eye on the smith but around a month after that day, I started noticing things. That same staring feeling came whenever I saw one of those idiotic kids run out of town with one of his creations. Every night those creatures walked the town, I saw my friend’s armor waving at me. The first time, I stayed in my house for a week going crazy. Nowadays, I wave back. Might as well be a good neighbor. The other thing I noticed was that everyone else seemed to say the same things every week. Prices stayed the same, new adventurers came through but if I ever asked, people thought I was crazier than before. The Smith acted like my friend and told me he was going visit his son’s grave the next day. I choose to join him, better than going insane.

He knocked on my door near midnight holding a torch for each of us. He jogged twice as quickly as I could with my prime. He finally stopped at an empty hill above the town. There wasn’t a tombstone, makeshift or otherwise. He pointed at the town. The ground shook.

What I thought was the town could best be described as a giant with the town growing out of his body. I fell on my ass and felt tears flying down my face. I crashed into something metal on the way down. I hate that damn armor. The Smith walked up to the creature and started rubbing a finger it outstretched to him. He was saying stuff like “how are you, son” like he was talking to a loved one. I fainted after that point.

The next day, that armor was in my room, along with a sword and a bow that felt equally familiar. I felt eyes on me again along with being sick. The Smith was in the other room cooking something that barely looked like food. Those weird things I noticed grew in intensity. Some days when I woke up, that armor was making me breakfast. It was this shitty gruel that I used to eat on the road with my friends.

I honestly don’t know what’s going on in his town and I’ll definitely be dead before anyone reads this. All I can say is this:

Beware the smith who sells weapons. They’re alive with something and nothing here is what it seems.

#smith #oc #my writing

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error404pagecannotbefound · 5 years

Text

twenty-eighteen

I’m going to be downright honest here: from a superficial review of my year, it seemed as if 2018 was my worst year yet. I have to remind myself that this is an annual sentiment, especially when I don’t sit down to truly evaluate the year that has passed.

Beneath the suspicion of 2018′s goodness and wonder, I know how well I have been treated by whatever powers I still believe in. So here’s a monthly review to remind me of the good and the great:

JANUARY

passed the DCAT (AB-CAM)

passed the ACET (AB COM)

started my last semester in UPIS (shet eto na talaga???)

FEBRUARY

received a notification about getting 500 likes on Tinder HAHAHAHA

mounted our last #MCLive as #MC2018

went to UP Fair Cosmos 2018 and finally heard Munimuni and Ben&Ben live!

Attended my cousin’s wedding (where I looked hella good heh)

Opened a bank account (#adulting)

MARCH

Interned at M&P!! (learned a lot and realized where I could plant myself and make roots)

Traveled to Laguna with the family during Holy Week!!!!

Decided that it was finally time to move on (with a letter na hindi naman na-send to boot HAHAHA)

APRIL

Watched a movie on my own for the first time!! (I watched Never Not Love You pls don’t judge me HAHAHHA)

Got nominated for indiv awards for Parangal 2018 but got rejected for all of them hahaha

Produced a video and teaser for MC Channel!!!!!!

Received my grad pics (totoo na talaga!!)

Passed the UPCAT!!!! BA Broadcast Communication, wouldju bilib? (sa wakas, my family can finally say “lahat kami taga-UP” because it’s now true huhuhu)

MAY

Received an award for best thesis with my fellow thesis kweens!!

Received an oven from my parents (haha ang aga but what the hell, this is bitch is baking!!)

Had our last #MC2018 party (what a ride it has been with these people and I am thankful for the home we have built huhu)

Made videos for my brother for some summer cash hahaha (waw is this my future as a BC student HAHAA)

JUNE

Attended a photog workshop!!

GRADUATED AFTER 6 YEARS IN UPIS!!! (I started off hating my new school before I was even accepted but ended with a love for my alma mater which will surely bring me back no matter how far I go.)

Attended my Grad Ball (from Eastwood to Katip real quick HAHAHAHAHA PERO SARADO NA PALA WALRUS SO ANEK???)

JULY

Registered for my first sem in UP waaaaah

Caught up on all the books that I put on hold for goodness knows how long

AUGUST

STARTED MY FIRST SEM IN UP!!!!

Decided to run for FST council (hahah kala ko ba pagod ka na, H?)

celebrated my grandfather’s 90th birthday!!!!!!

Found myself missing my friends but also made new ones hehe

SEPTEMBER

Performed during our Culminight and realized I liked to perform (if I could muster enough courage haha ty to my blochandlers, UP SAMASKOM!!!!)

Watched Anim Na Tauhang Naghahanap ng May Akda with Sneakies

Attended my first rally and realized that my silence gives no comfort to others

Applied for UP BroadGuild!!

Had a mini-reunion with HS batchmates

OCTOBER

Celebrated my 19th with the sneakshitsss and my bloc mates waaah <3

Became a member of UP BroadGuild (huhu I love this org so much?????)

Went to UPM instead of attending an ACLE HAHAHAHA

Went to Kidzania during Adults’ Night with my brother HAHAHA

NOVEMBER

Facilitated Tagisan 2018 with BroadGuild!! (My first event as a mem!!)

Watched The Dressing Room!!

Survived hell week huhuhuhu

DECEMBER

Closed my first semester in UP with a 1.1 GWA (Univ Scholar si bacclaaaaaaa)

Drafted the Konse Constitution with my councilmates!!

Traveled to Cebu, Siquijor, and Negros Oriental with my family!!

MISCELLANEOUS (wow parang school fees lang????)

almost daily lunches with my blocmates!

nights out with my HS batchmates and barkada

random catching up in hallways haha

lunches with people I haven’t seen in months/years

lots of takoyaki hahaha

random landi na di nagtagal but I had fun anyway, sana sila rin charot hahahahaahahahhaa

visits to my Eng/Fil Dept moms and titas in UPIS HAHAHA

hosted different events!!!

baked goods!! (and the datung I got from selling my baked goods haha)

new music, books, and films!!

a shit ton of selfies

pictures from my travels and what not

In hindsight, the only thing I was missing in 2018 was an attitude of thanks. 2018 was a great year, but it took a bit of reflection to realize that. Shit happened. I learned more than I thought I could in a year. But despite (and because of) everything, I want to give thanks for every bit of good that I have been given the pleasure of experiencing in 2018.

This 2019, I start the year with an understanding that happiness is fleeting. It is a luxury I can only borrow and not own. This gives me hope that I may learn to love things as they are in my grasp and not try to keep what has already gone. I pray that I may learn to have joy beyond fleeting happiness. I pray that I may give thanks before it’s too late.

Happy New Year, self! You have yet to give back to the world. 😊

#2018 #good bye #hello #happy new year #in review

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astoundingbeyondbelief · 6 years

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Fifty years ago, Japan’s Kaiju Boom was at its peak, with Ultraman and Ultraseven on TV and films from four of the country’s five major studios in the theaters: Toho’s Son of Godzilla and King Kong Escapes, Daiei’s Gamera vs. Gyaos, Nikkatsu’s Gappa, and Shochiku’s The X from Outer Space. Wouldn’t you know it, in 2017 there were five kaiju movies and two Ultraman shows too, as the transnational Kaiju Boom rolled on with no end in sight. Let’s take a look back at all that transpired.

1) Kong is King

If cinematic universes are the future, then the world’s greatest kaiju are lucky to have Legendary Pictures in charge of theirs. Jordan Vogt-Roberts’ Kong: Skull Island, the second entry in the MonsterVerse started by Godzilla in 2014, hit theaters during a busy March to rave reviews and respectable box office. Packed with monsters, helicopters, talented actors, and 70′s hits, it kept the action contained on the giant ape’s home; a restrained blockbuster by today’s standards. If the film’s post-credit scene ate up the conversational oxygen a bit too much, well, that’s the price you pay for teasing Godzilla, Rodan, Ghidorah, and Mothra in one scene.

But that wasn’t all for the Eighth Wonder of the World this year. BOOM! Studios’ Kong of Skull Island comic concluded with its twelfth issues. It was succeeded by a one-shot, Kong: Gods of Skull Island, and a strangely apt Planet of the Apes crossover, still being published. Legendary got in on the act too with Skull Island: Birth of Kong, a prequel/sequel to the film.

I have proposed a moratorium on Kong titles with “Skull Island” in them. Unfortunately, this confusing trend is set to continue, with Jonathan Penner and Stacy Title currently writing a King Kong Skull Island TV show for MarVista Entertainment and IM Global Television.

2) Godzilla is King of the Whole Stinking World, What Now

Another year, another new Godzilla movie. It’s been a while since we could say that, hasn’t it? Godzilla: Planet of the Monsters, the first in an animated trilogy by Kobun Shizuno and Hiroyuki Seshita, was released in Japanese theaters this November. A worldwide Netflix release will follow on January 17th. The next two are coming this year, presumably so Toho can atone for not releasing one in 2015. Godzilla: The City Mechanized for the Final Battle (or however it’s ultimately translated), due in May, will feature the return of Mechagodzilla.

Shin Godzilla, meanwhile, made kaiju history earlier in the year, becoming the first film in the genre to win Picture of the Year at the Japan Academy Awards. (It also netted prizes in six other categories.) On the American side of things, Legendary finally started filming Godzilla: King of the Monsters (2019), and Godzilla vs. Kong (2020) found a director in Adam Wingard.

On the home video front, Shin Godzilla hit DVD and Blu-ray around the world, and Criterion picked up the rights to almost every film in the Showa series, plus Rodan and The War of the Gargantuas. Physical releases have yet to be announced -- they’re currently streaming on Filmstruck -- but seem inevitable.

3) Sturm Organs, Chaiyo Vanquished, and the Phantom Channel

I could have made this post the 2017 Ultraman Year in Review without changing the format of the photoset one bit, although the tone would have been a shade more bitter.

Ultraman Geed, starring the son of arch-villain Belial, ran for 25 episodes. Ultraman Zero and his mild-mannered salaryman host Leito ended up stealing the show. (It also gave us the phrase “Sturm organs,” which I never want to read again.) Cruchyroll, as is tradition now, announced it was simulcasting Geed about eight seconds before the first episode aired.

Ultraman Orb: The Origin Saga, the prequel to last year’s series, concluded on Amazon Prime Video in Japan. A promised English release never worked out, although the fansubbers picked up the slack.

Ultraman Orb the Movie arrived in Japanese theaters on March 10. It wasn’t very good, but Ultraseven made a hell of an entrance.

Keeping the Orb train rolling, the 24-minute Ultra Orb Fight aired over the course of eight episodes of Ultraman Zero: The Chronicle, another one of Tsuburaya‘s compilation shows.

Ultraman X the Movie and Ultraman Ginga S the Movie played in a handful of American theaters, with English dubbing from William Winkler Productions. Winkler also dubbed the three Zero movies this year; no word on when they’ll be released, nor what happened to the physical/digital releases of the X and Ginga S movies.

Tsuburaya Productions uploaded scores of Ultra Fight episodes to its YouTube channel. Unfortunately, no subtitles were provided; the show’s narration was significantly more intensive than Redman screaming attack names.

Toku, a ludicrously obscure on-demand channel, picked up the rights to a ton of Ultra shows, most of them without official releases in the U.S. -- Leo, 80, The Ultraman, Neos, Nexus, an English dub of Max, Ultraseven X, both seasons of Mega Monster Battle, and Neo Ultra Q. No one has recorded any of them. The channel is affiliated with Amazon Prime, but only 80 (free on Crunchyroll) and Neos (already fansubbed) are available through it. go90 also has Neos and Ultraseven X (also already fansubbed).

In November, Tsuburaya finally regained the international distribution rights to the first six Ultra Series from UM Corporation, setting the stage for more abrupt Crunchyroll additions in 2018 and beyond. Before the ruling came down, UM licensed Ultraman to a Chinese company, BlueArc Culture Communications, for three years. Dragon Force: So Long, Ultraman was released in Chinese theaters in October. I thought this ruling would make it rather difficult to see, but, uh, it’s on YouTube already.

The Ultraman manga by Eiichi Shimizu and Tomohiro Shimoguchi reached Volume 11 in Japan, with a 3DCG film adaptation by Production I.G and Sola Digital Arts due in 2019.

4) She is Colossal

Director Nacho Vigalondo and Voltage Pictures survived a Toho lawsuit to bring us a bizarre tale of alcoholics in an upstate New York town who have the ability to summon and control giant beings in Seoul under very specific circumstances. Kaiju are often metaphors for issues that are accordingly massive in scope, like nuclear warfare or environmental devastation. Here they embody more personal problems -- not a totally novel concept, but one handled with far more depth than, say, Ultraman 80. The movie was a thud at the box office (the producers apparently ordered an upgrade to the VFX after rave festival reviews), but will hopefully find a second life on Hulu.

5) What Do You Find Between a Dragon’s Teeth?

Based on a 2014 short, The Dragon Dentist is an anime film (well, a two-part TV special that’s 90 minutes long) in which dragons and humans have reached an unusual agreement: the humans clean the dragons’ teeth, and the dragon rain down destruction on their enemies. If that sounds strange, well, it’s just the tip of the iceberg. Unless Planet of the Monsters pulls off a miracle, it has my vote for best kaiju movie of 2017. Section23 released it on Blu-ray in October with an English dub included.

6) A Jaeger is You Times a Thousand

Pacific Rim Uprising, the sequel that refused to die, is mere months from release, and its trailer made a big splash at New York Comic Con this year. Mysteries abound about the plot, but we have details on an art book, prequel novel, prequel comic, novelization, and plenty of toys. (Still waiting on that tabletop RPG and the return of the Create-a-Jaeger site.)

7) Reddo Continuation, and Other Printed Works

IDW may be finished with Godzilla, but Matt Frank is far from finished with kaiju comics. He sold The Last Hope, his Heisei Gamera prequel doujinshi, at G-Fest this year, and announced in October that he would be writing and drawing a comic about Redman, the murderous Seventies “hero” of recent YouTube fame. Phase 6, the same company reprinting Godzilla: Rulers of Earth in Japan, is the publisher. Other kaiju comics this year: Season 3 of Xander Cannon’s always-excellent Kaijumax (which I need to finish reading), Greg Pak’s Mech Cadet Yu (which I need to start), and Marvel’s crossover event/miniseries Monsters Unleashed (which I am too intimidated to start).

And in the realm of prose: Steve Ryfle and Ed Godziszewski published their long-anticipated Ishiro Honda biography, providing a comprehensive look at the legendary kaiju director’s life and career. Raffael Coronelli threw his hat into the authors’ ring with Daikaiju Yuki and Y2K: Yuki Conquers the World, post-apocalyptic epics about the Pantheon Colossi and the human heroes who join with them to protect the world.

Oh, and some guy named Michael Callari announced he was writing a book on the Gamera series.

8) Every Monster Has a Country

The movie-mockers of Mystery Science Theater 3000 have been linked with giant monsters since the beginning, and this year’s Netflix revival saw them taking on two more: Reptilicus and Yongary, Monster from the Deep. The former led off the season, and the novelty of a monster from Denmark led to one of the show’s greatest songs.

9) In Memoriam

As I wrote in August, “Monsters, of course, live forever. The people who bring them to life are never so lucky.” 2017 saw the passing of four giants of the kaiju genre:

Haruo Nakajima (b. 1929) -- Suit actor and fight choreographer for Godzilla and countless other Toho/Tsuburaya monsters from 1954 to 1972.

Yoshimitsu Banno (b. 1931) -- Director and co-writer of the Godzilla vs. Hedorah, assistant director and co-writer of Prophecies of Nostradamus, executive producer of Godzilla (2014).

Yoshio Tsuchiya (b. 1927) -- Eccentric actor with a long tokusatsu filmography, including the titular role in The Human Vapor, the Xian Leader in Invasion of Astro-Monster, and Shindo in Godzilla vs. King Ghidorah.

Chikara Hashimoto (b. 1933) -- Suit actor for Daimajin in Daiei’s trilogy and Daimon in Yokai Monsters: Spook Warfare.

#godzilla #ultraman #king kong #kong skull island #godzilla planet of the monsters #ultraman geed #mst3k #colossal #the dragon dentist

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ikkydikky · 6 years

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Here it comes! Time for an end of the year “Here’s what I drew this year” list. Mainly just to archive my art now for future’s sake and tell myself my thought process and how I felt about it now.

I’m skipping over sketches and going straight to stuff that was finished and polished and I’ll explain each image as we go. Buckle up boys its going to be a long one.

We’re going to go to the first image I did this year and explain how things went from there!

Drawing #1, Scrubbed off Katia Managan

March 3rd 2017

Art is actually kind of hard when you don’t know what form, line consistency, anatomy, or any of those things are! In fact I only know about two of them right now! And how to put into practice one of them! This image shows what its really like to start out with base-nothing. The idea is cute! And I’ll probably redo it later on when I am probably a years worth better. It marks however the first thing I really posted online. To me, that makes it special.

Drawing #2, Sigrid, but smug.

September 9th, 2017

BIG gap between the two! And not a lot of improvement, or maybe a lot of improvement? Who knows. I think this image was the first thing I did digitally that I put up for other people to see, and it was exciting! There’s absolutely no construction to this. Prior to this image being done I was basically drawing people’s heads and circles. Like, pages upon pages of circle grinding to actually know how to draw a circle digitally.

The main reason why there was such a gap between March and September was due to me graduating high school. I basically didn’t feel like drawing at all when I already had the work load of school ontop of me. But the art starts coming a lot faster now. Yes you can see there was a huge prequel influence.

Drawing #3, Blushin Bob

September 29th, 2017

Art is something that you can really do a lot of, but you can easily get burnt out on. Animal crossing is actually one of my favorite games out there, and to try to pay tribute I drew this. Not uh, not exactly my favorite.

This image has me trying basically 3 new things I’ve never done before. Shading, clothes, fur tufts, and bodies. Yeah. Not exactly my best job at any of those. The shadows are, very inconsistent and its clear I didn’t really know how to do it properly. The fur is atrocious with it looking like spiked tumors, and the shirt rides up way too high like hes wearing a shirt thats way too short! Also he might be a bit too skinny.

This is kind of an image that broke me. At the time I was trying to fix every error when I just couldn’t, from the arm in the first attempt being god awful, to how the shading and shirt looks. I genuinely think this is the worst image in my library, and I knew it at the time since I drew nothing for all of October. You know. The month that’s meant to be the most inspiring artistically?

Drawing #4, Gondola The Peaceful Giant

November 12th, 2017

This was actually just a shitty paint up I did of a sketch practicing perspective. It was mainly for a draw thread on 8chan’s /v/ and probably my only work I’ve posted to an image board. I think generally doing art for anonymous people is a bit thankless. Its great for practicing but it really gives back no validation.

Keep in your memory these clouds, I’ll be talking about those later.

Drawing #5, Bunny, The space mechanic.

November 12th, 2017

This character was a mistake, not the drawing but the character! This is my first actual tabletop character and boy I flubbed it. But this is art retrospective. Not roleplay retrospective. Anyway. A portrait done with a new pen style that I don’t think worked out too well. It comes off a bit too rough and gritty. But it makes for unique coloring when it comes to painting. I’ll actually have some more to say about that in a bit too! This also marks the point where I really got into drawing again. See. The table top group I’m in rewards you for drawing pictures of your characters, no matter how shitty it is, as long as you do your best, you get a reward in game. Its actually a really, really neat system!

Drawing #6, Oh dear god why.

November 16th, 2017

This is going to be a reoccurring character, so. Lets get to talking about it here. This character was as far as I know, a joke character made by a friend that got turned into a full blown character for a campaign, she is nonsensical, random, actually crazy, and worst of all, vibrantly colored. She is the Deviant Art Sparkledog as a character. Which funny enough, is her character name. This was my first attempt at really going ‘sexy’ and ‘nude’. And actually I think Sparkledog is a perfect candidate for it because its already cringy and god awful to look at! So it hides my bad attempts at a sexy lady behind an already cringy character. Thanks friend.

Anyway to talk about the art its self. It was done with no ref or pose. And I think it kind of shows. Everything’s proportionate to a degree but something about the perspective of the whole thing feels... off. Of course the background is just slapped together with glue but I mean on the character. She’s laying on the ground but not in a way that I think is possible or comfortable.

This also goes as my second attempt at fur, it’s, better. But definitely not good. Ontop of that this is probably my first attempt at an actual muzzle! Pic below related.

Muzzles are really hard to do. For some reason. If you ever read Loomis’ Fun with a Pencil it becomes slightly easier, but it also kind of isn’t. A month later and I still struggle with them, A lot of my joke sketches I often forgo any sort of attempt at drawing a muzzle and go for round head shapes, this works out if the character’s species is a prey type, as the eyes for herbivores are often on the side of the head, while for predators, its facing dead ahead. On another note, apparently I can just *do legs* with almost ease. I’ll touch on this more in a bit.

Drawing #7, A background for the end.

December 2nd, 2017

Tabletop is a wonderful thing, art groups are also an amazing experience to ever be apart of. The group I’ve been with has been an amazing experience for me artistically as I’ve learned to grow so much more. This is an image I did as soon as I woke up on my birthday. Friend A. did the character sketch. Friend b. did the coloring of the characters, and I got to practice something that I’ve wanted to do for ages.

Environmental art.

Ontop of character art and such, one thing that always draws my attention is environment art. Its something you can always get lost in. Your eyes can search to every corner imagining what it would be like to be there. Genuinely amazing works of art is often environment art.

Its also time we talk about the clouds. I hope you remembered them from the gondola picture. See. Clouds are all about layers, and layers, and layers. Especially when done in a thunder storm. They’re something I might recommend painting if you ever want to start out! I do however think the clouds in the gondola image work a lot better. But I think that might be from the several things I did to trick myself to think they look better.

And that’s all there really is to say on this image. Which is a problem. I learned a bit more about perspective and how floors work when under character’s feet... and how to do lightning kind of. But there isn’t much else. If I were to do this more I’d probably add another cliff to the background. A mountain, a landscape just beyond the fog, because it seems unfinished as it stands.

Drawing #8, Oh dear god why, Revengeance.

December 5th? 2017

Probably the only unfinished image that gets posted! So lets talk about it. I think fur is my least favorite detail to make ever.Yet it also is my favorite when its done. The tail also might not be the best but its league’s better than my first attempt! But lets talk about the main thing about this image.

PAWS.

I don’t have a thing for paws, or feet, that’s not my kink. I think footjobs are sort of appealing sure but I don’t care much for it. so this was my first attempt at paws, and I think I did damn well. However, digitigrade legs are something I still have an issue with, and I am working towards fixing that. I don’t think furry characters look great when their legs are humans, but with paws. As well I think legs are the easiest part of the body to draw in some ways, that might just be me.

The face also is a bit of a mistake? Its better than its.. original incarnation...

[NOT EVEN THE DEAD KNOW PEACE FROM THIS EVIL]

Animal faces with human features is the proper way to do things, but human faces with animal features is... Hell incarnate.

Also that ass took me like 30 tries to get right god damn.

Drawing #9, The last hoot for today.

December 18th, 2017

The last one for today. Some point after Christmas I’ll post probably another three drawings. But this is the final one. Lets talk about a few things about myself.

Art style is all about inspiration. You pick up inspiration from everywhere. Specifically from art styles you really, genuinely enjoy. You might have noticed the art style at first was I Wanna Be The Kazerad and then to something completely different from Kazerad but not distinct from anyone else. This is the process I think to finding your own art style. Emulation.

You might also noticed I ditched aliased (pixely) lines in favor of smooth lines, this was because I was having a tiny issue with drawing at large scale. For some reason I always liked zooming in real close on my 2000x2000 canvas and drawing tiny little things. The bunny picture is a really good example of this. He only took up the tiny corner of my much, much larger canvas. Speaking of his part of this post, lets get into color.

There’s been 3 ways I colored things, the first was plain flats, second was with a sort of homemade crayon brush (Ala Bunny and Gondola), and third was a unique way in how I did the eyes of this image. Looking at them closer you can see theres, actually a lot of rich detail in them!

This was a pretty easy thing to do and it has such amazing results that, I want to do a full image using it just to try it. For how I did it, I use krita, and how it handles gigantic brushes is like most art programs, by automatically raising the spacing between each ‘use’ (for a lack of a better term.)

Here’s what the blue part looks like with a white background behind it and the layer count to make this beside it. (Only one of them visible.)

It also kind of hits close to to another artist I’ve been following pretty closely as of lately. (And more recently on tumblr.)

You might not have heard of @jamdrawers , and you should definitely check them out if you haven’t. They are someone who, in my eyes, has such a wonderful art style. Other artists that do a style with pixelly, aliased lines don’t even come close in my opinion. I bring jam up here because of a few things, the art style he presents has thoroughly inspired me to pick back up trying to draw in aliased lines again, and because going forward I’ll continue looking to him for inspiration. Also if you read this jam tell winrarphile I said thanks for getting me into your art.

Now, when it comes to the owl its self. I regret not adding a thicker outline to all of her character, and instead kept it to just the head shape, as well I do think she comes out a bit bland. Of course color wise its to keep in theme with the rest of the table top groups color theme. But outline wise? Definitely needs work. I tried a ‘hair style’ for her but that didn’t really work out either. So I kept it to the three feathers at the top of the head. I also think I spent more time on this image than I did any other, to quote myself “I’ll finish this owl up in about an hour or two”, which quickly lead to 8 days instead, just through procrastination.

Don’t do something in art if you really don’t want to do it. You can easily, easily get fatigued and burnt out with out delay, but among this procrastination came other sketches that, I don’t think I’ll post here, but helped me learn hands somewhat. So there is that.

Thus ends this posts governing topic. If you read this whole thing, good job. If you didn’t and skimmed to the end. That’s fine too! I understand I got a bit wordy but, I genuinely wanted to lay out my thoughts about all this.

In conclusion, I think the rate at which I’m getting better is decent, Mistakes are being ironed out each new drawing I take on. Each study and figure drawing adds onto the many experiences I’ll use for later in my artistic career, and I think the rate at which I’m drawing is far too slow for my own tastes, as such its a goal for the upcoming year to get a lot faster with finishing each drawing so I can quickly move onto the next. Thank you for reading this.

Have a noid chewin’ some pizza as a reward for coming down to the end.

#art #my art #kazerad #prequel #long winded spiel

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xb-squaredx · 4 years

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Gaming in 2019: A Look Back

2018 was a quieter year for gaming. With new consoles on the horizon, Sony and Microsoft were in a transitional period, and while Nintendo hit the ground running with the Switch in 2017, aside from Super Smash Bros. Ultimate at the end of the year, they seemed to stumble a bit. By stark contrast, 2019 has been absolutely bonkers, with tons of quality titles and bigger announcements littered throughout. With 2019 now at its end and the end of a whole decade upon us, let’s take a look back at the world of gaming over the past year, and take in the highs and lows.

BACK TO BACK HITS

In going over all the releases this year, I was surprised at the sheer number of quality titles spread across 2019. New games release all the time, but 2019 in particular seemed hell-bent on keeping customer wallets empty with release after release. January kicked things off with a bang; Capcom graced us with the remake of Resident Evil 2, a gorgeous, terrifying reimaging of the survival-horror classic and it seems 2020 will follow suit with a remake of Resident Evil 3. Speaking of threes, Kingdom Hearts III released and…while many fans seemed happy with it, the hype surrounding it was nowhere near as high as I had always imagined it would be. Of course, the fact that this is the twelfth installment might have something to do with that. But hey, it finally happened and that counts for something. I suppose the same could also be said for the long-awaited and shadily-funded Shenmue III. It doesn’t seem like it made a huge splash; the general consensus is that while the gaming industry grew in-between the releases of Shenmue II and III the Shenmue series itself largely ignored those advancements. A game that, much like Duke Nukem Forever, would have likely fared better had it released in a timelier manner. All this talk of threes and somehow Half-Life 3 remains in development hell…but at least we’re getting a VR game, right? R-Right?

As the year went on, we saw a lot of high-quality action games like Devil May Cry 5, Astral Chain and Sekiro: Shadows Die Twice, and for some reason racing games made a bit of a comeback with Team Sonic Racing and a remake of the Crash Bandicoot racers all in one package. Fighting games in particular had a lot of titles throwing their hats into the ring. From the bloody Mortal Kombat 11 to the titillating Dead or Alive 6¸SNK also introduced a new generation to the Samurai Shodown series with a new installment, and Smash Ultimate slowly unveiled a stellar lineup of new characters as DLC throughout the year. Remakes seemed particularly in-vogue this year, from the previously-mentioned Resident Evil 2, to Final Fantasy VIII, Medievil, and Link’s Awakening. I feel that “games as a service” are starting to decline in popularity, however. With Anthem, Bioware’s last hope, bombing, EA had a bright spot in Apex Legends showing up out of nowhere and momentarily drawing players away from the likes of Fortnite, though Epic’s smash hit remains to be truly toppled. With the monetization of these games still under fire, I think the public is starting to wise up about the often-predatory practices put in place that come at the detriments of the games they’re attached to. While these titles continue to be popular, we’re well past the saturation point, and players have a limit to how many of these games they can fit into their lives. They’re called “forever games” but nothing lasts forever…

There was a steady flow of releases throughout the year, but for whatever reason, September was the month where it seemed everything was coming out, with a few notable titles in late October or November. No real droughts to speak of, really. While Hideo Kojima’s crazy new game, Norman Reedus and his Radical Fetus er…I mean Death Stranding caught a lot of people’s eye, and the Pokémon franchise continued to make bank, some smaller indie titles managed to stand out from the pack. Really unique titles like Hypnospace Outlaw, GRIS and Untitled Goose Game come to mind, as was the unexpected collaboration of Crypt of the Necrodancer and the Legend of Zelda franchise with Cadence of Hyrule. Not to mention a certain slipper-wearing skeleton got into Smash Ultimate as a costume. At this point, indie developers can stand shoulder to shoulder with the bigger dogs in a lot of ways. I mean, when indie-darling Disco Elysium can walk away from The Game Awards with four wins (including beating out Reedus’ Fetus), that shows how far we’ve come as an industry in many ways. Every time I stop to remember some of the more interesting games that came out this year, a lot of them come from smaller developers. Seeing how the bigger companies have embraced indie developers, when they were once shunned, is also pretty great, even if relations aren’t always perfect.

THE BIG THREE (and google)

Focusing on the larger companies for a bit, we’ll start with Microsoft…who were a mixed bag this year. On the one hand, Gears 5 seemed to be alright, and on the other hand, Crackdown 3 came and went without so much as a whimper. Then came the long-awaited reveal of their new console at The Game Awards, of all places. Introduced as the “Xbox Series X,” Microsoft seems set on trying to confuse as many people as possible when it comes to discussing their different consoles. Or maybe they’re rebooting the brand to just be Xbox. Whatever helps them sleep at night.

(Expect confused parents at launch!)

Sony largely got through this year without too many issues. They continue to underwhelm with their “State of Play” direct announcements, but in general they have several upcoming exclusive games to look forward to. Buying Insomniac and securing them as first-party is also a pretty big move on the whole, and they ended the year with Death Stranding finally seeing release. Nintendo, meanwhile, provided a bunch of unique game experiences throughout the year. A unique action game in Astral Chain, ghost-hunting fun in Luigi’s Mansion 3 and they even found a way to make exercise fun with Ring Fit Adventure! With fairly solid Directs throughout the year, they’re a lot more consistent in quality and general hype this year in comparison to last, when it seems like all hopes were riding on Smash, which has gone on to be the best-selling fighting game ever, by the way…

I suppose I should pay lip service to Google’s own attempts to break into the gaming scene with their release of the Stadia, a streaming platform that they swear is the future of gaming. It’s billed as a “work-in-progress,” and initial reaction to it seems mixed. Some find delay so bad that games can be unplayable, and there’s been several shenanigans at launch, but maybe by this time next year all the kinks will be worked out and it’ll be hunky dory! Or maybe Google will abandon it like so many other products. I’d be surprised if it’s still relevant by this time next year.

DELAYS, DOWNERS AND DEXIT

2019 had its highs, but a fair share of lows too. Delays seemed to also be common this year. Right as 2019 was starting, Nintendo had a fairly transparent announcement that the long-awaited Metroid Prime 4 was restarting development from scratch. Animal Crossing: New Horizons and DOOM: Eternal also ended up delayed into March of next year, though interestingly enough fans seem to take such announcements much better than in years past. Reactions to delays are often one of disappointment, but understanding, especially if it’s all for the game’s benefit. It’s perhaps for this reason that the DLC roadmap for Mortal Kombat 11 saw a massive delay in character release from the usual schedule, following reports of crunch at Netherrealm Studios. After 2018 shone a light on the often hazardous work environments of game development, it does seem that delays are being used as a way to take some pressure off of developers. It’s too early to say that things are genuinely improving across the board, but it’s a start at least. Not all stories have happy endings though, and the continued fate of Telltale Games remains in a strange limbo. With Telltale Games bought by LCG Entertainment, it appears at least SOME of the former employees have a new home and even a few of their games can live on, however at present it’s not quite known if things are going to be any better for the employees there, so let’s cross out fingers. As 2019 neared its end, it’s also unfortunate that Alpha Dream closed its doors, after years of producing some well-regard RPGS starring everyone’s favorite plumber. The industry can be pretty volatile, even when you often work with the bigger dogs.

For me personally though, the biggest downer this year was the fallout surrounding the Pokémon fandom. Following an announcement that the newest games in the series, Sword and Shield, wouldn’t be compatible with all of the veteran Pokémon, the fandom seemed to split in half, one side overly critical of the games and their apparent declining quality, while the other side seemed overly defensive, casting aside legitimate concerns. It got really ugly, and even though I enjoyed Sword and Shield for what they were, the discourse left a sour taste in my mouth. 2018 made a big show of how rough some game development studios have it, facing tons of pressure for sticking to deadlines and facing crunch periods that leave people battered and broken. With Game Freak having to kowtow to the demands of higher-ups at Nintendo and The Pokémon Company to hit that release window, delays weren’t an option for them, and they even cited various game development problems in interviews before the game launched. But people want their product and they don’t seem to care how they get it. If there’s something I hope the Pokémon fanbase can learn following all this, is that there’s a big difference between voicing concerns over something you love, and harassing people that are trying to make the best of a bad situation. Looking at the bigger picture, Sword and Shield’s “Dexit” debacle isn’t the biggest gaming controversy of the year, but it was the one that affected me the most and it kind of puts a damper on ending the year strong.

TO THE FUTURE!

I’d rather NOT end on a downer though, so looking towards the future, if 2019 is any indication, there’s a lot to be excited for in 2020. For starters, we already know of a lot of hotly anticipated games set to hit next year, most of which seem to be targeting March…g-great! From the long-awaited Final Fantasy VII remake (or…part of it anyway), to Cyberpunk 2077, we also have what are set to be the swansongs of the PS4, The Last of Us Part 2 and Ghost of Tsushima. At year’s end, the PS5 and uh…Xbox…will hit store shelves and while there’s still a LOT we don’t know about either machine, be it specs, features or launch lineup, a new console launch is always cause for celebration. New possibilities! Classics in the making! A clean slate! 2020 will likely be a year to remember just on that alone.

The world of gaming is one I’m always invested in; there’s a lot of grimy stuff I’m not partial to, but plenty of good sprinkled throughout. Every passing year I see many new, innovative games come out of small, passionate developers who want to keep pushing the medium forward. Certain larger companies have also started on a “redemption arc” of sorts, with Capcom leading the charge. The “Big Three” routinely have new and exciting things to show, and we’re at a point where the video game industry is fully ingrained into popular culture. eSports continue to grow and expand, we’re getting rare video game films that don’t suck like the Detective Pikachu movie, and looking back on the last decade, things have come a long way. The greater focus on online continues to allow us to connect and play with others, and the last few years have had more conversations surrounding Cross-Play between the major competitors. If Microsoft and Nintendo can work together, who knows what can be accomplished! We’ve seen the medium mature, or at least attempt to mature, and variety has become more important than ever. After years of dull, grey shooters littering the market, games are allowed to be colorful again! We see studios pushing for diversity, for games with greater focus on mature themes, and while we still have a long way to go in a lot of areas, progress is being made. If Kratos, the God of War, can learn to chill out and become a (moderately) better person, then there’s hope for the medium yet, and with a new console generation and new decade waiting for us, 2019 lets us end on a relatively high note.

Here’s to a great 2020.

-B

#xb-squaredx #blog #2019 #gaming #ps4 #xbox one #nintendo switch #sekiro #devil may cry 5 #smash ultimate #crackdown 3 #anthem #indies #video games #google stad

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fuzzylikesmedia · 7 years

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Summer anime 2017

All the summer anime has premiered now, except for Hell Girl season 4 (7/14) and The Reflection (7/22), and I'm going to be away this weekend, so I might not watch Hell Girl until next week anyways. So it seems like a good time to write up some brief thoughts on the shows I watched, which is nearly all of them. The exceptions are:

HiDive exclusives, I didn't want to get another subscription

Netflix shows which won't be available legally for months (fuck you Netflix for that, at least I have the Kakegurui manga)

Sequels I hadn't watched the original of

Symphogear, which hasn't been announced by anyone yet (as of 7/13)

I didn’t actually finish the first episode of all of them, but I tried.

This ended up super long, because there are a lot of shows.

I’m going to go through these in order of premiere date, anything else is too hard to keep track of. I’ll include a note for the full length shows I didn’t watch as well.

Hina Logi: From Luck & Logic (on Crunchyroll, Saturdays at 12:00 am EDT)

This is a spinoff of Luck & Logic, which I didn’t watch, and I didn’t watch this version either. I really don’t know anything about this, you can check out the reviews on ANN.

Fox Spirit Matchmaker (on Crunchyroll, Saturdays at 9:30 am EDT)

I bailed out of this one less than 10 minutes in. It’s a bad romcom with bad animation, and I didn’t like any of the characters. I can’t recommend it at all, even if you like straight romcoms.

Kakegurui (Netflix, so probably all the episodes will be availabe early October)

First watch the OP (Sayo Yamamoto worked on it) right now: http://www.dailymotion.com/video/x5sahqn

I couldn’t actually watch the show, since it’s a Netflix license, but I’ve read the manga up to the latest chapter and I love it! (It’s the source of my icon). It’s very trashy, and often gay. There is a male MC, but he doesn’t really do much, and mostly exists to be the person who gets everything explained to him. Also because we never get Yumeko’s (the female MC) point of view. I highly recommend the manga and the anime.

Fate/Apocrypha (Netflix, it was announced at AX that the first batch of episodes would be available November 7th)

This is yet another Fate show, but I’ve been hearing good things. Apparently the source for this one isn’t written by Nasu, which is a point in it’s favor. I don’t really have much more to say, if you want to get into Fate stuff, I recommend Fate/Zero. I never really got into other Fate stuff.

Katsugeki/Touken Ranbu (on Crunchyroll, Saturdays at 1:00 pm EDT. Also on Anime Strike but why would you choose that over crunchyroll???)

I watched some of Touken Ranbu - Hanamaru last fall, but it didn’t really grab me. I definitely prefer the bloody action of Katsugeki to the slice-of-life comedy of Hanamaru. I also can’t keep track of the huge number of characters the game has, so Katsugeki’s focus on a small number really helps. If you like bloody action, I recommend it. It’s one of my favorites this season.

Symphogear AXZ (no announcement yet, hopefully Crunchyroll)

This is the fourth season of Symphogear, the first 3 are on Crunchyroll. I’m currently part way through the second season. It’s magical girl action with a music focus, and I enjoy it a lot more than I thought I would. The premise for this fourth season seems like it could go some bad places (read: could get very transphobic), so be warned. I’d recommend checking out the first season at least, though.

Knight’s & Magic (on Crunchyroll, Sundays at 11:00 am EDT)

This definitely wins a prize for the worst punctuation in an anime title I have seen. That being said, I enjoyed the first episode, but gave up partway through the second. It’s an isekai story based on a light novel, which is not a setup that inspires much hope in me, but I liked that the MC was reborn(?) as a child, rather than simply transported. If you like mecha shows check it out I guess?

Clean Freak! Aoyama-kun (on Crunchyroll, Sundays at 12:30 pm EDT)

This is a comedy sports anime that actually really surprised me. I’m probably not the best person to talk about it, so I highly recommend reading this review at Anime Feminist. I liked it, and I’m currently partway through the 2nd episode, and I think I might stick with it.

Battle Girl High School (on HiDive, Sundays at 12:30 pm EDT)

Not willing to get a HiDive subscription yet, and it doesn’t sound like this show is worth it. If you’re curious, check out the reviews at ANN and Anime Feminist.

Elegant Yokai Apartment Life (on Crunchyroll, Mondays at 11:30 am EDT)

This is a supernatural slice of life comedy, and while it’s not amazing in anyway, it’s not really bad either. If you really like this sort of comedy I’d recommend checking it out, but I’d probably recommend Inu x Boku Secret Service first.

LOVE and LIES (on Anime Strike in the US, and HiDive in some other territories, Mondays at 12:00 pm EDT)

I did not like this show. It wasn’t actually painful to watch, so I finished the first episode, but I will not be watching more. The premise is based on the idea that Japan starts assigning marriage partners when kids turn 16 based on some sort of compatibility in order to fight dropping birthrates. Actually, the show specifically mentions genetic compatibility, and the whole premise has a very eugenics feel to it. On top of that, this setting is being used for a romcom. There are probably some interesting stories that could be told with this setup, but a straight romcom is not one of them. All this being said, I’m definitely watching people’s twitter reactions to the show going forward, because I’m sort of curious what kind of trainwreck this might become.

Restaurant to Another World (on Crunchyroll, Mondays at 2:05 pm EDT)

This show was definitely very nice to look at, but I just couldn’t get invested in it. If you want a peaceful show about a restaurant that opens to a fantasy world once a week, then check it out. My favorite part was the dragon lapping stew from a pot, tiny in comparison to her.

Aho Girl (on Crunchyroll, Tuesdays at 11:30 am EDT)

(short-form, 13 minutes) Even though this is a short, I still couldn’t make it all the way to the end of the first episode. It’s very 2000′s style super fast comedy, and feels super mean spirited.

Tsuredure Children (on Crunchyroll, Tuesdays at 11:45 am EDT)

(short-form, 13 minutes) I finished this one, which was mostly cute vignettes about straight highschoolers in love, but the 3rd one made me feel really uncomfortable. Not planning on watching more.

Fastest Finger First (on Crunchyroll, Tuesdays at 3:30 pm EDT)

This is a show about kids doing quiz bowl, which wasn’t a thing at my school, but this is probably the closest I’ll ever get to a math competition anime. The main character was likable enough, though the girl was more interesting. This feels like it might become a girl who is experienced at x teaches boy how to x, and he is the best ever at x, sort of thing. I do want to check out the second episode though. An interesting thing to me was the voice of the girl. She’s apparently a rookie voice actress, and sounds very different from the typical anime high school girl voice.

Netsuzou Trap -NTR- (on Crunchyroll, Wednesdays at 8:30 am EDT)

(short-form, 9 minutes) This show is super super SUPER trashy yuri, and I loved it. I can’t really recommend it, but I’m definitely sticking with it.

Saiyuki Reload Blast (on Crunchyroll, Wednesdays at 11:00 am EDT)

This is an adaptation of the latest Saiyuki manga. I have never read or watched any Saiyuki before, but I watched this episode. It had a very 00′s feel to it, from the character designs to the dialogue. I imagine that this is the sort of thing that you watch if you already like Saiyuki, or maybe if you miss the feel of anime from the early 00′s. I’m not sticking with it.

Dive!! (on Anime Strike, Thursdays at sometime, anime strike is bad at sharing details)

I wanted to like this show, but it just wasn’t good. It’s very clearly trying to get the Free! crowd, but is hindered by bad animation and boring story. It’s this season’s Noitamina show, by the way. The most notable thing about it for me, was that it actually managed to trigger my fear of heights, which I don’t think has ever happened to me with an anime before. I think it must be because diving (off a 10 ft board) was a real thing I was too scared to do (and probably still am too scared to do).

Convenience Store Boy Friends (on Crunchyroll, Thursdays at 3:05 pm EDT)

This feels like the most boring possible show you could make from it’s title. You could have personified stores, personified products, but instead it’s just a quite boring highschool romance. They don’t even work at a convenience store! They just occasional stop by there! Also the guys working there looked way more interesting than any of the main characters. Possibly the most boring premiere I watched all the way through.

Action Heroine Cheer Fruits (on HiDive, Mondays at 9:00 am EDT)

I didn’t watch this one because it was a HiDive exclusive, but I’ve actually read a lot of good things about it, which is not what I would have expected with that name. Still not worth the HiDive subscription though. You can check out the review at ANN and Anime Feminist.

Made in Abyss (on Anime Strike in the US, and HiDive in some other territories, Fridays at 10:00 am EDT)

This was a super beautiful premiere. It’s a really gorgeous looking fantasy series. It didn’t completely grab me, but I think that’s because it requires me to be in a mode where I can actually give it full focus, which makes it harder to watch. I can’t recommend this show yet, however, because I have heard that the manga goes really bad places. I’ve heard that the first episode already removed some of the skeevy stuff, but I can’t recommend this until I can see where it goes.

18if (on Crunchyroll, Fridays at 10:00 am EDT)

I gave up about 10 minutes into this one. It’s a very dream sequency show, but it doesn’t have the animation quality or pacing to make it work for me. If you like surreal stuff in general, I’d say check it out to see whether it grabs you, but know that it might just feel really boring.

Vatican Miracle Examiner (on Anime Strike in the US, and HiDive in some other territories, Fridays at 11:00 am EDT)

I fucking loved this!!!!! It’s my favorite premiere so far, and I can’t wait for more. It’s not a good show, but it’s super fun. This review at Anime Feminist explains what I like about the show. It has the feel of some of my favorite stuff from the early 00′s, and it’s super campy, and I love it.

Chronos Ruler (on Crunchyroll, Sundays at 3:00 pm EDT)

This is not a good show. It has super bad animation, convoluted plot, overly expository and over dramatic dialogue (ok, half these things were also true of Vatican Miracle Examiner, I admit). I finished the whole episode, but I really have zero interest in watching more. It just isn’t offering anything that other shows aren’t doing better this season.

Altair: A Record of Battles (on Anime Strike, Fridays at sometime)

This is a very good show, but on that I really need brainpower to watch, which means that I will probably drop it at some point. It’s very nice looking, and I love political intrigue, but it doesn’t feel like easy watching. Check it out if you enjoy political intrigue stuff.

Hitorijime My Hero (on Anime Strike in the US, HiDive in some other territories, Saturdays at 11:00 am EDT)

This was decent BL. Not good, but not terrible either. The main couple is a student-teacher relationship, so be warned of that, I guess. It just felt super plain to me. Also super confusing. The first episode felt like it jumped around a lot chronologically, and it was really hard to understand what order things happened in. I’m not continuing with it.

Welcome to the Ballroom (on Anime Strike, Sundays(?) at sometime)

I watched the early premier of this on Twitch, which had desynced subtitles, which was super annoying. I don’t know if that’s still true of the version up on anime strike, but it’s frustrating that this is still a problem for them. And with a hyped up premiere as well!!! The show itself is a shonen sports anime about ballroom dancing. The character designs are very lanky and weird looking, but I sort of like the style. It just didn’t really grab me. I think I didn’t like the main character enough to care about him. And that I don’t care about ballroom dancing at all.

A Centaur’s Life (on Crunchyroll, Sundays at 10:30 am EDT)

This was a sort of weird show. It starts off with a lesbian kiss, and does a school comedy sort of things for the first half. The second half is that plus world building, which brings in a bunch of weirdly dystopian elements. Like talking about past injustices being illegal. So I’m going to keep on watching this for the little gay bits and to see where the hell it’s going.

Princess Principal (on Anime Strike in the US, HiDive in some other territories, Sundays at 10:30 am EDT)

I really loved this. It’s a spy show about girls, so I’m not at all surprised, but it’s still a nice feeling. The OP has hints of gayness, which is good. And the show in general is a fun spy show. It’s like what I wish Joker Game had been. I really recommend checking this one out. It’s another one of my favorites.

Angel’s 3Piece! (on Crunchyroll, Mondays at 8:30 am EDT)

This most frustrating thing about this is how good is was for a lot of it. Like I wasn’t expecting anything from the summary, but then the first half of the show was pretty neat, and the music was good, but it’s by the author of Ro-Kyu-Bu, which should have told me everything I needed to know. As should the episode title: “Heart Throbbing for Elementary School Kids!” That title probably says everything you need to know.

In Another World with my Smartphone (on Crunchyroll, Tuesdays at 9:00 am EDT)

I gave up on this one super quickly. I just don’t care about another dude dying and going to a fantasy world and suddenly getting a harem. I just don’t.

New Game!! (on Crunchyroll, Tuesdays at 10:00 am EDT)

Sequel to New Game!, which I never finished. It was a cute show about women making games though. Maybe I should try to watch more of it sometime. ANN has a review of the first episode of this.

The Irresponsible Galaxy Tylor (on Crunchyroll, Wednesdays at 12:30 pm EDT)

(short-form, 3 minutes) I guess this is related to The Irresponsible Captain Tylor? I never watched that either. I watched this, but didn’t really pay much attention. I guess if you watched the original thing check this out???

Magical Circle Guru Guru (on Crunchyroll, Tuesdays at 2:05 pm EDT)

So apparently there was an older version of this that aired in 1994, but this is a complete reboot, not a sequel, so you don’t need any familiarity with the original. The sense of humor reminded me a lot of Senyu, with a heavy focus on classic rpg video game elements as well. It’s a very fast paced shouty sort of humor, but it was a fun first episode. It didn’t really do anything I haven’t seen before, so I’m probably dropping it.

Light of the Clione (on Anime Strike, Tuesdays(?) at sometime)

(short-form, 9 minutes) I was interested in this one based on what I read of the premise, but so far it’s been two students feeling sorry for, but not helping, a girl getting bullied. Since it’s a short, it has a much lower bar to clear for me to stick with it, so I probably will. The character designs feel sort of off, though, and the animation isn’t very good.

Ikemen Sengoku: Bromances Across Time (on Crunchyroll, Wednesdays at 10:45 am EDT)

(short-form, 5 minutes) CG short about a dude who gets transported back in time. Based on an otome game, apparently. Otome games need more full length adaptations, they keep on getting these short form series instead. Anyways, this show doesn’t really have anything to recommend it.

Nora, Princess, and Stray Cat (on Crunchyroll, Wednesdays at 11:15 am EDT)

(short-form, 4 minutes) Cute short that has a harem set up, accept someone transformed the boy into a cat, and no one knows how to turn him back. Funny, cute, and short enough for me to keep watching.

My First Girlfriend is a Gal (on Crunchyroll, Wednesdays at 11:30 am EDT)

This show is not good. You should watch Please Tell Me! Galko-chan instead. Seriously, the most interesting part of this show is the bedazzled censorship objects. I bailed out about five minutes in, because I couldn’t stand the main character and his friends. There is nothing to recommend this show. Even if you want weird censorship items, you can watch Seven Mortal Sins instead.

Classroom of the Elite (on Crunchyroll, Wednesdays at 12:00 pm EDT)

I was expecting to quit out of this show partway through, since it really didn’t look at all interesting to me. I also hated the first five minutes or so. But I actually really liked the rapport between the two main characters, probably because it reminds me of My Teen Romantic Comedy SNAFU. I curious to see where the main plot heads as well. I think it’s worth getting through the opening to see what the show has to offer, because it definitely got better after that.

GAMERS! (on Crunchyroll, Thursdays at 11:30 am EDT)

This is another show I was expected to not make it all he way through, but instead I really liked it. It’s about a high school gaming club, and the super popular girl trying to recruit the main character to join. I think what really worked for me was how relatable the main character felt at times. He’s a “casual” gamer, and feels really intimidated by how intense the club members are. I really understand that feeling. I’m looking forward to more of this show.

And that’s it! I’ll probably wait to write about Hell Girl and The Reflection until after both of them air, at which point I’ll also have a better idea of what shows I’m actually going to keep.

#this took me a long time to write #I also kept on wanting to use emacs commands while writing #I think it must be because almost all the typing I do on a keyboard is at work #and most of that is in emacs #when I started writing this it was thursday night #but I ended up finishing it up friday morning #anime season review #next time I do this I should split it up so it's not so fucking huge #long post

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abovethesmokestacks · 7 years

Text

Make Me Feel Like I’m Real (5/7)

Title: Make Me Feel Like I’m Real Pairing: T.J Hammond x OMC Rating: General Audiences Warnings: swearing, increased hate for tabloids? Otherwise none Spoilers: spoilers for Political Animals (esp. the last couple of episodes)

I am so sorry I flaked out for MONTHS. I got caught with the nastiest flu ever in mid-November and didn’t shake it until week after New Years. In between better and worse periods of being sick, I had a very untimely case of writer’s block, so all in all a shitstorm as far as writing was concerned. Finally managed to finish this baby tonight, and I hope you all enjoy it! Let me know if you want in on the taglist.

TAG LIST: @loup-malin, @ursulaismymiddlename, @sarahsassafras13, @bakexprayxlove, @booksandshowsandmovies-ohmy, @sinceriouslyamellpadalecki,@lilasiannerd, @the-hidden-seeker, @bovaria, @ceebeetumbles, @the-scars-and-the-stripes, @smile-youlookbetterhappy, @captain-amelia-bradley, @mrshopkirk, @amrita31199, @winter-in-wakanda, @avengerofyourheart, @creideamhgradochas, @themcuhasruinedme, @feepsmoothie, @nuvoleincielo, @wellfuckbuck, @callamint, @tatortot2701, @mellifluous-melodramas

<< Chapter 4 | Chapter 6 >>

June 2014

”Please jailbreak me.”

”That bad?”

”I feel like I have ants crawling under my skin.”

”Do I say ‘you’ll be okay’? Or will that make it worse?”

”I hate myself.”

”I love you.”

”I don’t deserve it.”

”I still love you.”

”Please bake me a cake with a rasp inside it.”

”I’ll send you cupcakes and a $1 nail file.”

”How you holding up?”

”Okay, I guess.”

”Really?”

”No. I’m terrible. I remember exactly why I tried to halfass my way through it before.”

”But you won’t now?”

”I won’t. I promise.”

”I’m sorry.”

”What? What happened?”

”No! No, it’s-it’s a step. I should be doing this face to face, and I will, I just… I’m so sorry.”

”Oh.”

”A conversation for next week. Just… I don’t know. I wanted to get a head start.”

He returns home at the end of March.

Rehab was different this time. Same place, a couple of people he recognized from his previous stint, but this time T.J actually tried. Dutifully went to appointments, talked, reflected, fought, accepted. The first week was hell, as expected. One year apparently did very little to tame his cravings. He was commended for making it so far essentially without help, for returning to rehab, and when he stepped outside the doors to finally leave, he felt ready. He could do this. One day at a time.

And then he realizes he promised Aiden he’d call once he was home, and one day at a time becomes one second at a time. They’ve only spoken on the phone a handful of times, exchanged a couple of pictures. Trouble is huge now. The sensation of ants under his skin returns full force when T.J picks up his phone, and he can’t even bring himself to call. He scolds himself for being such a fucking chicken and sending a text.

>>Can I come over?

>>ofc

>>I missed you

>>me 2

Everything seems so amplified. He’s about to see his boyfriend for the first time after three months, for the first time since that night. The rehab welcomed him immediately, and T.J packed his bags, sending Aiden and his parents a short text from the cab. His mother called a couple of times during his stay, asking if he wanted them to visit. He declined her every time. It was better that way. He couldn’t fathom having to deal with himself at times, even less his family. Plus, things were getting serious on the campaign trail. Caucuses and rallies had kept Elaine busy. T.J didn’t want to interfere. Either way, it wasn’t his first rodeo.

His bags feel lighter as he dumps their content on the bed, sorting through the mess. Dirty clothes, toiletries, a notebook he got to keep track of all the things he wants to do, needs to do. It’s gotten to be a pretty extensive list. Smiling, T.J sets it on the bedside table. He’ll have to look through it later, see where he can start. It’s mostly amends, but he figures he can’t ignore them, not if he really wants this to stick.

When Aiden knocks on his door ten minutes later, T.J’s heart kicks into high gear. It’s… He realizes he’s scared. They are together, or so he fervently hopes. What if Aiden wants to take a break, the kind that always remains a break and never has a happy ending? T.J pulls at the sleeves of his henley, trudging out to answer the door. Aiden’s outside, smiling expectantly. It’s not the full-on grin that’s like the sun on a cold winter day, but it’s something. T.J’s heart is still beating hard, but it’s as if the other man’s presence calms it, however little.

”Hi.”

Yeah, it’s awkward, and if he didn’t know better, T.J would say he’s been transported back to high school. For what feels like hours there’s only tentative smiles and hands shoved into pockets before Aiden takes the first step. He brings T.J in for the tightest hug he’s had in three months ̶ three fucking months ̶ and it’s the best thing he’s ever experienced, he’s sure of it. It’s more than the sensation of being held tight; it’s the scent of Aiden that he would happily drown in, and just being home. Aiden presses a gentle kiss to his lips, and T.J can swear he’s flying. He’s home.

It’s not easy to be back, and it takes a couple of weeks for them to get back into the life they were right in the middle of before New Years. There’s the issue of T.J having to adapt to life post-rehab, taking the responsibility he never really bothered with the last time. There’s also, well, life. T.J has things he needs to do. He needs to leave the club, or at the very least renegotiate his position in the hierarchy. Aiden keeps busy, rehearsing with the orchestra for a month-long concert tour that, yes, has T.J worried. There’s also the issue of the election.

Preparations for the final stretch of the nomination process have been going on for a while, gathering support from delegates and maintaining their donor base. Sooner or later they will knock on his door, and he will be asked to do his part. He’s not sure if it will be easier or harder this time. It’s not him the spotlight will be on primarily, but with his history, he will be dragged into it plenty. The addict son of the Secretary of State, now second-time-Presidential candidate, and the former President, at least one suicide attempt, hospital visits that were swept under the rug, plenty of scandals to choose from. Yeah, what opposing candidate and newspaper would turn that down? It’s easier because he’s trying to stay clean, level-headed, and not fall apart at the slightest hint that he’s in trouble. And, he has Aiden by his side. It’s harder because he will have to deny himself the escape when the spotlight eventually stays too long on him and tries to burn him. And… he has Aiden by his side. The tabloid article that ran back in October was nothing compared to what might be published now. He’s not ashamed of Aiden, absolutely not. He just wishes he could shield him from the cruelty of the press.

Some of it is easy. T.J gets out of his club deal, no hard feelings (just an obscene amount of paperwork), and he continues his efforts to fulfill the program outside rehab. Making amends with Gunner has his stomach in knots, and he feels like he’s doing it wrong when the other man nods and pulls him in for a hug. He fucked up another man’s sobriety, and this is it? It feels too easy, and T.J wants to do more, but can’t come up with any gesture that would atone for his wrongdoing.

Most of it is… not exactly hard, but unfamiliar. He thought he’d be more confident in his abilities, in his resolve to stay clean post-rehab, but all he can see nowadays are potential pitfalls. Each passing day bring him closer to Aiden leaving to go on tour, and it’s hard to feel confident when he knows what happened last time he was alone. He also realizes he has to let Aiden go, that he can’t let it stand in his way. He went to rehab so he could get past not only the addiction, but the co-dependency, too. It will be okay. T.J repeats it like a mantra, rehashing the coping mechanisms he’s learned should he be tempted, making sure he has places to be while Aiden’s gone.

When the day comes, he’s restless. By 8 am, he’s already on his third cup of coffee, and keeps rechecking Aiden’s bags to make sure he has everything he needs. It sucks. Things are finally starting to settle between them, they’re doing good, and now they gotta make it on their own for a month. Aiden lets him fuss, until the cab honks angrily outside his apartment, after which it becomes a race to see how many affirmations and kisses and silly little declarations they can cram in before they have to open the door and wave at the cabbie to wait.

”I’ll miss you,” T.J mumbles, straightening the lapels of Aiden’s blazer, fingers tripping over each other from too much caffeine.

”You’ll do fine. You can text me anytime, about anything, and I’ll call you as often as I can, okay?”

”I’ll still miss you.”

”Trouble will take care of you,” Aiden coaxes, nodding to the now very large cat sitting at their feet.

They’ve decided to let Trouble stay with T.J until Aiden gets back home. It’s easier for everyone. T.J gets to stay in his safe space, he’ll have something to focus on daily and Trouble gets taken care of. It’s a win-win for everyone.

”I’ll blame him for everything then.��

Aiden rolls his eyes at him, leaning in for a final goodbye kiss before taking his bag and the cello in its case, and walking out to the cab. T.J feels like some strange 50’s housewife, waving off his man as he rides off into the distance. Only thing missing is a fucking handkerchief. Behind him, Trouble meows loudly, looking very perturbed and apparently knowing that his owner has gone off and won’t be coming back for some time. T.J snickers, picks up his phone and snaps a picture of the groused cat.

>> he looks like he will murder me X attachment img_1293.jpeg

>> Damnit, told him to wait until Friday! X

>> play good ok? X

>> I will. I love you. X

>> i love you X

>> I love you. X

>> i love you X

>> Turning off the street now. I believe in you.

He keeps staring at those four words throughout the day, smiles as he reads through the rest of the conversation. So blessedly ordinary, so perfectly okay. T.J knows the feeling won’t last forever, and revels in it for as long as it lasts. Aiden calls when they get to their first stop, only dropping his phone twice as he tries to unpack and talk at the same time. It’s easy, effortless. He can do this. He can. He can.

For the most part, he does okay. The schedule he’s set up for himself helps. Meetings, dinners, Trouble. He plays a lot, working his way through the treasure trove of sheet music Nana gave him for Christmas two years ago. The first week of Aiden’s three week tour goes by without a hitch. He’s energetic, he has a plan, it works. It goes so well T.J starts worrying, and so is not surprised when the following week he suddenly wakes up one day with a weight on his chest that is another kind of trouble. It’s that dangerous cocktail of loneliness, doubt and a day with no plans. His skin feels electrified, fingers twitching for something to do, the apartment feels too small. The real Trouble meows, demanding his attention, but T.J can’t focus. He makes sure the furball has food and heads out.

It’s dangerous, and he knows it. Last time this happened… He lets out a shuddering breath, digging his hands deeper into the pockets of his jeans. It will be okay. It’s not even noon, he would be foolish to try, he’s been doing good, he just- he has to come up with something to do. T.J keeps a running commentary on himself as he stalks downtown, heart aching because he wishes Aiden was here. His first truly bad day since coming out of rehab, and of course Aiden has to be away. He knows he’s supposed to be okay, that his sobriety isn’t and shouldn’t be tied to his boyfriend, but that doesn’t mean this feeling of anxious worry in his chest will go away as easily as it would if Aiden was by his side now.

>>not doing so good 2day. trying 2 find smth 2 do. miss u.

It takes Aiden all of two minutes to respond.

>>Tour is overrated. Can’t wait 2 come home. U will make it through 2day, I know it. Call me if u need to, travel day 2day. xo

This man, he’s too good for him. His body this aches and wants and writhes, but T.J fights. He ends up going to lunch, finding a reason to kill an hour. It becomes two hours, a staffer who used to work for Elaine on Dougie’s team recognizes him, comes over to talk. It’s good, normal. Smalltalk and business talk and empty phrases. ”I don’t know anything about that, and even if I did, you know I couldn’t say anything about it.” ”Tell Doug I said hello.” ”Sure, I will!” T.J can’t even remember the guy’s name.

He visits Nana, determined not to let anything tempt him today. She’s surprised at first, but seems to realize he needs refuge from the world. They play showtunes and watch horrible soap operas for hours before T.J feels safe and centered enough to return home. Trouble needs him. It’s a strengthening thought. He’s needed. The cat climbs him like its own personal tree the second he’s inside the door, and he holds the purring fuzzball close, doesn’t mind when Trouble curls up next to him on the bed. He can’t wait for this loneliness to come to an end.

He should have known even thinking about the possibility of being happy once Aiden gets home was tempting fate. The days have felt impossibly long, and he has gone stir crazy trying to work through the combined stress of loneliness and worry about his resolve. T.J can practically see the finish line. One more day, one more night. He can do it.

With one day left, he’s pulled back into the harsh reality. T.J’s phone explodes around 9 am, sending Trouble into a tizzy that ends with claw marks etched into his arm before the spooked animal sets off like a rocket to hide under the couch. Hissing at the quickly reddening marks, he fumbles for his phone and blindly sliding the blinking icon to answer.

”Yeah?”

”Aw. You sound like you’ve had a lot of sad, lonely nights.”

”Aiden?” T.J sits up, clenching his fist so as not to itch the scratches. Aiden snickers at the other end of the line.

”Were you asleep?”

”Are you surprised? It’s Saturday!”

”I thought you’d be lying dramatically on the couch, crying your heart out,” Aiden rebuts, and though the tone is teasing, the comment confuses him.

”Are we- Should I know what you’re talking about?”

”Oh. Oh, okay. You haven’t seen it. We’ve apparently broken up according to at least two tabloids.”

T.J’s blood freezes in his veins. He tells Aiden to hold on, bringing up the browser on his phone, taking a steadying breath and then does what he’s long learned he shouldn’t do. He googles himself. In less than a second, his screen is filled with headlines screaming at him.

HEARTBREAK FOR HAMMOND?

ANOTHER ONE BITES THE DUST? - FORMER FIRST SON SPOTTED ALONE

TWEAKING T.J? NO THANKS!

LOVE 'EM AND LEAVE 'EM?

THE SINS OF THE FATHER… A YOUNG BUD HAMMOND IN THE MAKING?

His eyes skitter from one headline to the other, feeling his heart rate increase and his mind instantly kick up a whirl of ”What did I do?” It’s only when Aiden calls his name loud enough for him to drag him out of the judgmental tailspin that he takes a moment to calm down. Nothing has happened, it’s just gossip. They’re still together. Aiden is just away, doing a concert tour. No heartbreak.

Right?

”Aiden…” he begins, rubbing his forehead. ”I’m so sorry, I-”

”T.J, don’t. This isn’t your fault. I don’t blame you. You told me this could happen, and I accepted it. I know we’re not over, I hope you know that, too.”

”Of course! I miss you like crazy, and I’ve- I have had a few hard days. I’m still good.”

”I’ll be home soon, T, I promise. Are you eating okay? You looked a little pale in the pictures?”

Of course there were pictures. T.J groans.

”I’m not subsisting entirely on takeout, if that’s what you’re asking,” he replies, making a mental note to take out the boxes that have accumulated in his kitchen. ”I’ve had dinner with Nana a couple of times. Wholesome, filling meals. You would be very proud.”

His phone beeps, indicating another call, and he misses most of Aiden’s no doubt sarcastic comment checking his screen. Elaine. Fuck. He bites his lip.

”Mom’s calling,” he says, putting the phone back against his ear. ”I gotta take it.”

”Of course. Text me if you need anything, okay?”

”I’m sorry. Again. And again.”

”And I love you. Again. And again.”

They say goodbye, and T.J has to call Elaine back. She’s somewhere in Wisconsin, incidentally also heading home to prepare for a rally set for next week. Apparently she has put him on Google alert, and T.J’s not sure if he’s supposed to be grateful or miffed. As is, his mother is more worried than angry, asking if everything is okay, if he needs anything.

”I’m fine, mama, I promise. It’s all lies,” he assures her, crouching to hold out his hand when Trouble crawls out from under the couch to check if things have calmed down.

”You sure, sweetheart? I’ve got staff working on finding out the source for the articles. The timing is a little too convenient. They’ve left you alone for so long now, and suddenly running a purely libelous excuse for an article this close to-”

”I promise. I’m okay. Nothing I haven’t seen before. Aiden will be home tomorrow, he’s… he’s actually kinda amazing about this whole thing.”

On the other end, Elaine lets out a breath, and he can almost see her trademark smile. T.J can’t help but smile in kind, not caring that she can’t see it. Trouble comes trotting towards him, sniffing his hand to check if there’s a treat waiting.

”I’m glad. I’ll be home in a few days. We’ll talk more then, okay?”

After promising he’ll come by with Aiden once they’re all in the same city, they say goodbye, and T.J quickly works through his notifications. Doug has sent a bunch of texts, and the righteous anger almost jumps off the screen. Nana and Bud have both left voicemails, a bunch of emails have dropped in. Nothing to worry about in the grand scheme of things. And yet…

He can’t help himself. Against better judgment, T.J scrolls through a couple of the online articles, knowing they’re worse than the printed versions. Whoever invented the comment section should get a swift kick to the shins with a steel toe boot. It’s all variations on the same spiel, T.J Hammond spotted alone, looking tired and haggard, where is the still unknown boyfriend he’s been sighted with, are drugs behind the supposed breakup, and… There’s a picture of him talking to the staffer – what the hell is his name again? – that makes his stomach lurch. He still looks tired, but the pap has managed to catch him in a moment where he’s smiling, however tentative. Even though this is – should be – same old-same old to him, the insinuation that he’s cheating or moving on because of a relapse makes him nauseous.

By some miracle, T.J manages to tear himself away before he makes the terrible mistake of delving into the comment section, fearing it might set him off and make him do something stupid. He clenches his teeth, shutting of his laptop and pushing it away from himself. It’s.. not okay, but he’s okay. He can do this, it’s nothing he hasn’t encountered before. Only it is, his mind quietly tells him, and T.J can’t really protest. There’s never been anyone like Aiden in his life when this has happened. It’s been months, they’re good, even with his recent stint in rehab. All things considered, they’re good, he’s clean, why does this have to happen?

It’s a blessing to wake up to knocks on his front door the next day, to Trouble galloping to serve as welcoming committee, to Aiden’s smile as he sets down his bags and bring T.J in for a hug and a peppering of kisses, to calm in his soul. Couldn’t the paps capture this instead? Is this not as desirable?

”Next time, I’m bringing you with me,” Aiden speaks against the crook of T.J’s neck, holding him tighter. ”I don’t care how, you’re going in my suitcase. You’re getting contortionist classes for Christmas.”

”I missed you, too,” T.J replied quietly, drawing in the scent of his boyfriend.

He still smells a bit like bus and airplane, but there’s that ever-present smell of sandalwood hidden underneath, the soft cotton of his shirt evening it out. Aiden smells like safety, his tall and slender frame so easy to wrap oneself around, always warm no matter the season. Maybe it’s regressing a little bit, but right there, wrapped up in Aiden’s arms, T.J can’t help but feel relieved. He’s back, he can breathe a little easier. It is a nice little moment, tender and stretching out until seconds feel like minutes.

Until Trouble decides he’s done being ignored and uses them as his personal scratch tree.

They have a nice two days before Elaine calls to inform T.J that she’ll be home the next day and wants to have dinner with them both. He can almost hear how smug she looks when he turns to Aiden to ask if the time is okay, and he’s not entirely sure why it makes him blush a little. So Aiden hasn’t gone home since he got back. So maybe they’re enjoying the domestic bliss. So maybe it makes him feel better and not think about the articles so much. So maybe he likes it.

Aiden hasn’t been over for dinner with his family since Christmas, and T.J feels like he’s introducing him for the first time all over again. The way he hugs his mother is perhaps a tad perfunctory, but his stomach does a wild little somersault when he sees the way she smiles brightly at his boyfriend, hugging him as tight as she would her own two sons. Nana, true to her nature, is as brash as ever, holding her arms open for T.J and beckoning him over with a ”Come here, you little shit.” He’s almost surprised she doesn’t slap Aiden’s ass when they head to the dining room, where Dougie and Anne are waiting for them.

They chat amicably, polite questions about Aiden’s trip, about his parents. Dougie goes on a tangent about something that happened in Minnesota, and T.J can’t help but look at Anne by his brother’s side. She looks good, a lot healthier than she did back before they married. As fucked up as T.J had been, of course he’d noticed; the way she shuffled her food around her plate, the sometimes less than subtle excuses from the table. It’s a struggle, just like his own, and he can’t even bring himself to be jealous of her progress.

”So, how you holding up. T.J?”

Smooth, Dougie.

”Your faith in me is breathtaking, bro,” he shoots back, chewing demonstratively on his food.

Doug pulls a face at him, huffing. ”I just meant, it’s been a while since-”

”I’m good. It sucks, but it comes with being a Hammond. Same old, same old.”

”You know that’s not true, honey,” Elaine admonishes him, setting down her knife and fork.

And T.J knows that’s not entirely true either. The second Bud announced his intention to run for president, their lives were never the same. They became public property, something for people to scrutinize and put expectations upon. It’s not his father’s fault, but he’s not sure if he should put the blame on the people or the ones that cater to them.

”Any luck finding the bastard behind this?” Nana, always there to distract, even if it brings them back to the matter at heart.

”Nothing substantial yet,” Doug says, but T.J can tell from the way he clenches around the cutlery that there is something. ”I talked to Daniel-” That’s the fucking staffer’s name! T.J thinks triumphantly, ”-he didn’t seem like he was hiding anything.” His brother turns to him. ”Asked if you were okay.”

”Peachy.”

”Come on, man, we’re trying to help you!”

T.J is about to launch into a rant of his own, feeling the exasperation rise in his throat, but it lodges there, frozen in place when Aiden places his left hand over his under the table. It’s Thanksgiving and Christmas all over again, thumb running smoothly over his knuckles, a quiet show of solidarity, a simple gesture to say ”I’m here. It’s okay.” His outburst dies before it has time to potentially ruin dinner.

”I…” His voice comes out thick and low, and he squeezes Aiden’s hand. ”I don’t want to make a big deal out of it, it just makes it worse.”

”I know you don’t,” Elaine tells him, reaching out to pat his cheek. ”But if this is something… more, I want you to know that we’re not going to stand for it. You’ve been through enough, darling.” She pauses for a second, eye contact briefly breaking to look over at Aiden. ”Why don’t you bring Aiden with you to the rally next week?”

”Mom…”

Elaine pulls back, once again sitting straight in her chair. ”If you don’t mind?” She looks inquiringly at Aiden, and T.J can feel him stiffen in his seat.

”I… guess not? I-I just gotta check m-my schedule?”

”You don’t have to do this,” T.J assures him, then turns to his mother with a sharp look. ”Right?”

”Of course not, I just thought you would appreciate having him there. I know you don’t like these things all that much.”

Well, she’s not wrong about that. Elaine’s first campaign had been taxing enough to get through and that was when he could battle the pressure of presenting a perfect picture with blow. He’d been high a couple of times throughout, it was easier to smile and pretend that way. That’s not an option now. No floating through rallies and fundraisers in a blur, all edges smoothed out. T.J hates the way his mother managed to trap him, hates the way he can’t look at Aiden for the rest of the dinner, hates the way conversation dies down to hums and platitudes. He’s almost thankful when the family disperses after dinner almost like they knew this was painful. Aiden carries most of the charm as they say goodbye, thanking Elaine for the delicious food, giving her a hug that to T.J’s eyes looks as sincere as anything. He himself barely manages a light kiss to his mother’s cheek before he’s out the door.

”You’re angry,” Aiden states, slinging his arm around T.J’s shoulder.

He’s not sure whether to contest the statement or not. It’s not quite anger, not all of it. It’s worry and disappointment and apprehension, all swirling inside him, and T.J knows he needs to get a grip on it before it sets off his itch.

”You don’t have to come,” he murmurs, still keeping his eyes trained downwards, following his feet as they steer homewards. ”I can manage. Done it before.”

”But you don’t have to.”

Aiden stops mid-step, holding onto him gently to make him stand still, too, before placing both hands on his shoulders.

”I’m not… wild about the idea of standing in front a crowd, waving and smiling, but I can see what your mom’s thinking. If we go… if we stand there together, it’s a statement, right? We prove them wrong.”

”I hate that we have to do that,” T.J says, reluctantly looking up, breathing slowly in and out. ”I never thought I’d have to bring you into this, not this much. If she- If mom becomes President, I won’t move back. I don’t think Doug will either. It shouldn’t be as exciting as last time, people were going on and on about how the White House had not one but two First Sons, the first since JFK junior.” He uttered the last few words with rehearsed disdain, having heard them so many times, always with the same expectations attached to them.

”They came after you, T. You’ve done so well, and I want them to see that. If it helps that I stand by your side and show them just how much I am still in love with you, then baby, I’ll do it. I’ll dress up in my best suit, and I’ll kiss you on national god damn television if that’s what it takes.”

They both break down in snickers at that, T.J leaning in to press a kiss to his boyfriend’s jaw.

”You only have one suit, idiot.”

Aiden grins, kissing him back. ”Then clearly it’s my best one.”

It doesn’t take away all of his worries, but it eases them slightly. They spend the following days preparing, Aiden asking questions upon questions, getting asked questions in turn as he’s cleared by Elaine’s security to attend the rally as part of the family. It’s the only time before the rally T.J sees him even a little bit nervous, sitting with his hands clasped tightly in his lap, shaking and nodding his head so vigorously when he answers it sets the tight curls of his hair dancing. T.J draws a small sense of pride in being able to be the supportive one, to be the one who has the answers, who knows what will happen.

It doesn’t change the fact that they’re both a mess the day of the rally, hands shaking as they tie their ties, cursing under their breaths. True to his word, Aiden is clad in his only suit, hair pulled back into a tight bun. Though his heart is thundering in his chest, T.J can’t help but admire the man in front of him. It’s been almost a year since that first kiss, two years since they first met. It’s strange to think how much things have changed since Aiden came into his life.

”Hey,” he whispers, taking hold of Aiden’s hands as the man struggles to wrestle the silk into a tidy knot. His own fingers steady as they pry Aiden’s hands away, taking hold of they tie to twist and turn it in a pattern familiar to him. ”It’ll be fine. Find something to focus on. Not the people, that’s… overwhelming. Look at a flag, there’s always flags. Or balloons. I usually try to play connect the dots with them. One flag, linger. Another flag, linger.”

”And here I’d worked on my royal wave,” Aiden jokes, voice shaky as he exhales.

”You can wave.” T.J tucks the wide end of the tie through the loop he’s created, pulling to tighten the knot. ”I’ll be there.”

He smooths out Aiden’s shirt, pulling lightly on the lapels of his suit jacket. Aiden smiles weakly at him, fixing T.J’s tie in kind, straightening the collar before cupping his cheeks. T.J relishes in the sensation, the lightly calloused finger tips against his cheeks, the warmth emanating from the contanct. Tilting his head, he kisses Aiden’s hand, taking hold of it with his own, letting their fingers interlace.

”Ready?” he asks, gaze flickering over Aiden’s shoulder to the door behind which the public awaits.

”As I’ll ever be.”

It takes them both by surprise at first. Aiden, who has never been in front of this large a crowd before, breathes out a surprised ”wow” as they step onto the podium, squeezing T.J’s hand a bit harder. For T.J, it’s been a while since he’s been in the spotlight, but he eases into character sooner than he’d guessed, an easy smile gracing his features. He waves to the masses, his heart doing a little somersault when he sees Aiden doing the same from the corner of his eyes. The booming roar rises when Elaine finally takes the stage, and for a second, it’s almost like he’s back in that ballroom in Chicago.

The ruckus dies down as Elaine begins to speak, motioning with her hands for people to calm down. It’s always been fascinating to T.J how skillfully his mother can work a crowd, how with a simple gesture or a few choice words she can make her audience listen with bated breath, even when it’s just the standard phrases that precedes her true message.

”I am so happy to be here today, to see all of you. Your support and your enthusiasm are truly inspirational,” Elaine starts off, making a sweeping motion with her right hand. ”These are tough times, and we face even tougher times ahead of us. It is so important to stay strong, to stay together through these hardships.” The open palm becomes a fist, striking down with a decisive thud as her voice softens. ”It is far too easy to take the easy path, to turn a blind eye to injustice. I say, no more. No matter what happens, I will protect what matters to us, to this country. We are all family, and anyone who tries to challenge us, who tries to harm us,” She pauses, looking out over the crowd, and T.J can swear she is zeroing in on one of the cameras filming, “will see that we are prepared to defend ourselves.”

T.J has to fight to keep from frowning. It’s a tad more aggressive than he’s come to expect from his mother, almost to the point where it’s retaliatory. He steals a glance at Doug, looking proudly at their mother as the crowd breaks into cheers and applause. They all follow suit, but T.J can’t help but think there is something else going on, something in this speech he is missing, someone who will listen to it and see so much more than the impassioned outcry of a presidential candidate. He plays his part, knowing full well he will be in the papers for the coming week. He and Aiden have talked about it, prepared for it as best they can. The need to protect Aiden from the uglier sides of this mess boils in him, and through the final minutes of Elaine’s speech, he’s terrified that he made a mistake in letting Aiden convince him to come with him.

The man in question must have caught on to his discomfort, as he lean in to T.J when Elaine wraps up her speech.

”I’m fine,” he whispers under the thunderous roar, his breath tickling.

Something in him shifts, slotting together like pieces of a puzzle. They have made it. One year of sobriety and relapse and rehab and now the articles. It’s not gonna get easier, but they’ve made it this far. T.J thinks about how he’s been the older brother all his life but constantly been the one needing taking care of, needing protection. He wants to take that responsibility now, wants to be the man Aiden sees in him. When he smiles up at Aiden, there is true joy behind it. It stays etched on his face throughout the rally, on the walk home, settling into the kind of smile that lives in your eyes. Aiden stays the night again. Trouble sleeps nestled between them. T.J briefly wonders if this is what love really feels like before drifting off to sleep.

It takes the tabloids two full days to find out who Aiden is, running his life story over the following week. There’s nothing in there T.J doesn’t already know, but he can see the hurt in Aiden’s eyes, understands what he’s feeling. Someone has trespassed into his lover’s life. The way Elaine and her staff handles it makes warms his heart. She still refuses to say exactly what was up with her speech at the rally, brushing it off or switching the subject. T.J doesn’t believe for a second that the pointed jabs were just theatrics to win over the crowd. Maybe he’s not as invested in politics as Doug, but he’s sharp enough to see the broad strokes; the upswing in the polls leading up to the Democratic convention, the way the tabloids slowly back down from reporting on their every move. He’s sharp enough that when he sees President Fred Collier congratulate his mother on winning the nomination, he spots the unbridled disappointment and malice that the man tries to hide behind a slimy smile and grovelling words.

This man tried to destroy him. T.J swears to not let it happen again.

#t.j hammond #t.j x omc #political animals #political animals fanfiction #political animals imagine #fic: make me feel like i'm real

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Follow these 23 comedians and writers to survive the Trump era

New Post has been published on https://writingguideto.com/must-see/follow-these-23-comedians-and-writers-to-survive-the-trump-era/

Follow these 23 comedians and writers to survive the Trump era

Lindy West (left), Van Jones (center), Paul Krugman (right)

Image: Evan agostini/rainmaker photo/paul vallejos/ap

We’re sorry America, but for many of you, your deepest, darkest nightmare has finally come true: the questionably coherent reality television star of white nationalist dreams has officially become leader of the free world. Donald Trump is president.

It’s been less than a month since Trump won the election, and Americans everywhere are looking for signs of hope and reassurance. Sure, there’s no data to support a theory of hope (just spend a nanosecond on Trump’s Twitter, before closing your eyes very tight). But there are writers and comedians on Twitter who can provide something close to it, and remind you that there are other caring, reasonable people out there sort of like you.

SEE ALSO: Everyday household objects more qualified for public office than Trump’s cabinet

Below is a list of people to follow on various social platforms who can help you survive the next four years.

If just want someone to tell you it’s going to be OK (without lying)

1. Van Jones

Van Jones might be best known as the astute CNN commentator who popularized the term whitelash, but in recent weeks the pundit has unofficially become the nation’s de facto therapist. His most recent three-part video series interviewing Trump supporters made reaching across the aisle seem actually plausible, and he was one of the few liberal pundits to successfully predict Trump’s rise.

If you need to be reminded you that there are still rational, compassionate, not-Steve Bannon conservatives out there

2. Evan McMullin

McMullin, the former House GOP policy director who ran against Trump in the 2016 election, has been loudly denouncing the PEOTUS for embracing his party’s extremist white nationalist fringe.

Remaining silent now is allowing the Party of Abraham Lincoln to drift towards the Party of David Duke. https://t.co/JGEllCQZ3Q

Evan McMullin (@Evan_McMullin) November 23, 2016

3. Ana Navarro

Navarro, a conservative and CNN contributor, has been lashing out at her party for the past year, inspiring some of the best GIFS and tweets of this election, or any election, ever.

This @ananavarro speech could be the best single moment in the campaign pic.twitter.com/6zVBwbquXH

Seth Abramovitch (@SethAbramovitch) October 8, 2016

4. David Frum

Frum, senior editor at The Atlantic, is a moderate neoconservative who is so eminently rational and clever it almost makes neoconservatism seem cool?

If flag-burning merits loss of citizenship, what should be the penalty for a Nazi salute by a Trump supporter?

David Frum (@davidfrum) November 29, 2016

If you need to know that there’s still love in this world

5. DeRay McKesson

DeRay, a leading activist in the Black Lives Matter movement, produces a Twitter feed that is simultaneously full of grief, critique, and meaningful calls to action. He’s best known for tweeting “I love my blackness, and yours,” but there’s so much more like it.

Sleep well, y’all. Remember to dream.

deray mckesson (@deray) December 1, 2016

If you want to know if you’ll still have a job in four years

6. Paul Krugman

The New York Times columnist, economist and on-the-nose curmudgeon carefully and methodically debunks each one of Trump’s obscene assertions about the economy with get ready for it actual facts.

Another metric: Trump would have to do one Carrier-sized deal a week for 30 years to save as many jobs as Obama’s auto bailout

Paul Krugman (@paulkrugman) November 30, 2016

If you want to take down Trump and build a brand-new beautiful world (or something)

7. Rebecca Solnit

The author best known for Men Explain Things to Me (think: mansplaining) doesn’t have a Twitter account but does have an active Facebook following, where she shares calls to action and deeply empathetic essays that remind you why you want to make those calls in the first place.

8. Representative Keith Ellison

The progressive Congressman is gunning to become the next head of the DNC. Anyone who’s anyone (dorks) are watching Ellison to see what kind of vision he has planned for the party.

My plan for the DNC:https://t.co/stLKdNIOIA

Rep. Keith Ellison (@keithellison) December 1, 2016

If you want to spend the next four years laughing in a subtle-yet-depressed way

9. OhNoSheTwitnt

The comedian who delivered some excellent masturbation jokes in the pre-Trump era has now dedicated herself full-time to witnessing the (potential impending) apocalypse around us so we don’t have to.

Hopefully Trump won’t accept the results of the election if he wins.

(((OhNoSheTwitnt))) (@OhNoSheTwitnt) November 9, 2016

10. Maura Quint

Her feed isn’t all Trump (thank God) but when she goes there, she doesn’t let go.

I’d rather see someone burn the flag in an act of protest than wear it to the beach over their crotch thinking that was an act of respect

maura quint (@behindyourback) November 30, 2016

11. Kumail Nanjiani

The actor and comedian from Silicon Valley and Portlandia carefully balances despair with more despair.

This is the first time in our lives that fighting Nazis doesn’t require a time machine.

Kumail Nanjiani (@kumailn) November 22, 2016

12. Dave Itzkoff

Of course, the world is imploding around you but you’re not the only one who sees it. Itzkoff, and this Kermit GIF, does too.

Mr. Trump, acts of hate are being committed in your name around the country! TRUMP: … They might recount an election you won” TRUMP: pic.twitter.com/3yqluEJFqU

Dave Itzkoff (@ditzkoff) November 27, 2016

If you just really need someone to cut through the bullshit. All of it.

13. Joy Reid

Say what you will about MSNBC, but commentator Joy Reid has committed her Twitter feed/full life to exposing each and every one of Trump’s lies, hypocrisies, and wild allegations. Nothing seems to pass by her. (Truly nothing. She’s on Twitter a lot).

Trump claims the world will “respect us again” despite the fact that under Obama respect for the U.S. is high while the world loathes Trump.

Joy Reid (@JoyAnnReid) December 2, 2016

14. Jon Favreau

Favreau was Obama’s chief speechwriter from 2005 to 2013 and is now host of the podcast “Keepin’ it 1600.” Don’t believe that tiny bit of good news about Trump that the rest of the world has on blast? He doesn’t either.

The most bizarre part about “nasty woman” is that it came during an answer about the Social Security Trust Fund.

Jon Favreau (@jonfavs) October 20, 2016

15. Julia Ioffe

Columnist and Politico writer Julia Ioffe will, thankfully, never force you to find the silver lining.

IDEA: What if you could strip someone of their citizenship for their tweets?

Julia Ioffe (@juliaioffe) November 30, 2016

If you’re a teensy weensy bit concerned that our planet is on its way to hell

16. Neil deGrasse Tyson

The celebrity astrophysicist (who ever thought there would be such a thing?) has more than 6 million followers and is the voice of reason in a world of climate change deniers.

#IDreamOfAWorld where Politicians are scientifically literate, empowering them to make informed decisions that affect us all.

Neil deGrasse Tyson (@neiltyson) November 27, 2016

If you lack the words to describe what you’re feeling right now

17. Merriam-Webster

Sure, it’s a dictionary. But language is inherently political, and the mysterious talented ghost who runs Merriam Webster‘s Twitter right now has done some of the best subtweeting of the election season.

‘Fascism’ is still our #1 lookup.

# of lookups = how we choose our Word of the Year.

There’s still time to look something else up.

Merriam-Webster (@MerriamWebster) November 29, 2016

If you want to know if what Trump is doing is legal (it’s probably not)

18. Laurence Tribe

The liberal scholar and constitutional law professor at Harvard who has argued before the Supreme Court dozens of time should be far more popular than Alan Dershowitz, but sadly isn’t.

Sad lesson: Trump knows how to use optics to create counterproductive illusions; Obama assumed reality counts more than image https://t.co/rR1hHsNIYC

Laurence Tribe (@tribelaw) December 1, 2016

If you’re in that “angry caps lock tweetstorm” kind of mood

19. Judd Legum

Legum, an editor at Think Progress and master tweeter, has crafted some fine tweetstorms (and real pieces of journalism, blablabla) that can fulfill all your primitive, rage-tweeting desires.

3. But Trump has skills. His biggest skill is PROJECTING AN IMAGE OF SUCCESS, whatever the reality

Judd Legum (@JuddLegum) December 1, 2016

If you just want to check in and make sure feminism is still alive

20. Lindy West

West, the hilarious Guardian columnist best known for her relationships with trolls, will remind you that, no, feminism isn’t dead, it’s just really sad right now and needs some space, okay?

anyone else having this problem where you can’t watch children’s media about girls being bold & fearless & having hope w/o sobbing like baby

Lindy West (@thelindywest) November 29, 2016

21. Brittney Cooper

Brittney Cooper, founder of the Crunk Feminist Collective, might not be the most active tweeter, but every story she writes and collective post she shares is worth your full attention.

I know most of you don’t have words. I don’t either. But I found a few for this hard day. https://t.co/2nX9Y9lSoj

Brittney Cooper (@ProfessorCrunk) November 9, 2016

22. Roxane Gay

If you don’t know about Roxane Gay, now you do. Gay, author of Bad Feminist and a sometimes columnist for The New York Times, dissects human emotions like no one else.

Anyway here is the segment. https://t.co/LXkvJK8LQY

roxane gay (@rgay) November 23, 2016

If humans are being too horrible right now and the only thing that can give you peace is a barnyard animal

23. Goats of Anarchy

This goat is just like you a sad, frightened creature who only feels happy in a duck costume. Get a goat costume, or better yet, get this Instagram account.

Today, Polly and her duck suit captured the attention of media outlets all over the world. You may have seen her story… it’s been everywhere! In light of that, I thought I would bring back her duck videos that we took while visiting @tractorsupply. Is there no duck emoji?

A video posted by Goats of Anarchy (@goatsofanarchy) on Nov 25, 2016 at 5:15pm PST

RELATED: These are the most shocking quotes to come out of Trump’s 60 Minutes interview