#hotch x haley
Text
Question of timing
Summary: Aaron finally agreed to make Haley a mother and she realised that the d-day is now. The issue is: how to convinced a husband afraid AF to be a father to do the last step?
Characters: Aaron Hotchner x Haley Hotchner (Haley pov)
Contents: NSFW. Minors DNI. Explicit sexual intercourse, rough sex (kind of), consensual.
This is a surprise text written for the CM Family Challenge organized by @imagining-in-the-margins ; and that actually fits also the CM June Challenge hosted by @foxy-eva
(I say “surprise” because I didn’t want to post if at first. This kind of text is not easy to write, especially in another langage. I can’t stop fixing stuff here and there... Well, enjoy anyway. ^^; )
PS : English is not my mother language so they are necessarily mistakes. Sorry about that.
___
With her hands in the water, Haley mechanically washed the dishes, lost in though. Over the course of the morning, she had done the math over and over to make sure she wasn’t wrong and had come to the conclusion that it was now or never. Two months earlier, she’d backed her husband into a corner to open his eyes to the reality that he hadn’t kept his end of the bargain. Since the beginning of their relationship, she had given selflessly to support him in his career, even agreeing to move across the United States, leaving her family and friends behind, for him. Sure, she had the house she’d always wanted, which she could decorate to her heart’s content; she had the car and money to do as much shopping as she wanted, but it was far from filling the void that was growing in the pit of her belly.
The problem was that Aaron had a very conflicted relationship with parenthood because of his unhappy childhood. Having had no good examples in front of him, he was convinced that he was perfectly incapable of raising a child and refused to ruin the life of one of them because of his inevitable mistakes. So she had to negotiate hard to make him understand that his fears were no different from those of any future father and that, in any case, she would be there to have his back if necessary. After this bitter bargaining, he had finally given in; putting his fears in his pocket, and agreed to make her the mother she had always wanted to be. Only, he still had to be present when the time came to impregnate her, which was far from being so obvious with the position he occupied.
Nevertheless, she was hopeful that today would be the day. She hadn’t received a message that he’d left for another state, so he’d be there tonight to embrace her as many times as needed. It was still to be decided whether she should tell him the truth – at the risk of him totally blocking out – or whether she should gloss over the fact that she was ovulating – with the possibility that he might take it the wrong way for not having been told. That was the debate she had been having in her head all afternoon without being able to find the right answer. She wanted to be as honest as possible with him on the subject – which she knew was sensitive for him – but knew the impact of his mind on his possibilities of action. She still remembered how, under stress, he had been unable to get hard the first time they had spent an evening together. Luckily for her, he had found another way to make her come, which had allowed him to get a second date.
She was at this point of her reflections when she heard the engine of the car in the alley. She looked up, puzzled, and saw the hood of the sedan pounding on the pavement. A door slammed and the front door opened. Haley didn’t understand what was going on because it was far too early for her husband to come home from work. Yet it was him standing in the kitchen staring at her with a curious gleam in his eye.
- “Aaron?”
She had turned over to face him, her hands dripping with water and foam. Her companion was looking at her with a look she already knew and that awakened a pleasant sensation in her lower tummy. The first time she had met it, years before, she had been afraid before understanding that he didn’t want her any harm. On the contrary. Then, as the pattern had been repeated, she had asked Jason Gideon, one of her husband’s mentors, to find out more about the origin of this strange behavior. He told her that it was perfectly normal, that it was just a reaction to the intense stress of a near-death experience. In other words, to counterbalance the fact that he had come so close to the end of his life, her partner was trying to prove to himself that he was still alive. And often, this was done through feverish lovemaking leading to a revealing orgasm.
Eager to not break the spell, she said nothing more and Aaron hurried over to her and kissed her fiercely. She answered his call while keeping her hands raised so as not to ruin his exorbitantly priced suit jacket. Attitude of which he did not seem to care one moment. Plunging in her neck, he dropped several kisses on her nape while raising her top to expose her chest. With skill, he unhooked her bra and caressed her released breasts that his lips went to minutely. Haley felt her heart beating in her temples and held back to signal to her partner that she wanted more. At this moment, she would have given anything to have her hands dried so that she could open the buckle of his belt and reach this sex which she felt tended against her basin.
But it was him who passed to the attack unbuttoning her jeans and by lowering it so that it falls to her on the ankles. She released it of a blow of foot and let her husband raise her of the ground to install her on the table of the kitchen. She naturally spread her legs so that he gets closer to her and his left hand came to insinuate in her panties to prepare her. Haley was largely ready to accommodate him, but she moaned all the same when his index and middle finger started to play skillfully with her clitoris. The sensations which went up along her spine were such as she did not pay any more attention to the kisses which he continued to place in her neck. Only one thing obsessed her.
- “Take me”, she breathed, her eyes closed.
His hands removed her underwear then left the battlefield to throw themselves on the buckle of his belt and, a battement of eyelashes later, he penetrated her with energy. Pressed against her, his head coiled in the nap of her neck, his hands cramped to her asses, he began his comings and goings with an almost bestial ardor. Devoured by the waves of pleasure which pulsed in all her body and which threatened to make her capsize, her thighs rolled up around these hips which hammered her intimacy not without delight, she clung as she could to the jacket of her benefactor who growled in her ear. She soon reached the stage of the escalation, where each thrust amplified the power of the fire which rolled in her veins, leading her irremediably until the final explosion. Her breathing became shorter, her muscles tensed, her back arched to further facilitate these desirable intrusions. A rattle of ecstasy flowed in her auditory canal at the same time as a burning wave poured in her vagina. A firework imploded then in her cavity, tearing her a cry of incoercible pleasure.
Panting, they remained in each other’s arms for a while to catch their breath and get their heart rate down, then separated. Aaron, a little embarrassed, put his clothes back on without daring to look up at her, and then went to get her pants. He handed them to her with the air of a little boy caught in the act and gave her a shy smile. His partner laughed softly and kissed him on the mouth before dressing decently.
- “Sorry about the suit,” she said as she readjusted her bra.
- “It’s okay,” he replied, pouring himself a glass of water.
She presented him the cup which was close to her and he filled it with a trembling hand. They drank in silence while raising their eyes towards each other, like two new lovers who would have experimented a new position.
- “What happened?” she finally asked, curious.
- “We went with the SWAT to a hostage situation in a warehouse. I… I was negotiating with the responsible of the whole thing, so the SWAT could surround him without him noticing, when one of the guys kicked a screwdriver, he said, rolling his eyes. The guy didn’t appreciate the trick and fired in my direction. I saw the bullet go by my head.”
- “So, I owe this very pleasant moment to a clumsy SWAT guy?”
- “Must be a trainee.”
Haley burst out laughing and Aaron smiled again. She put her cup on the table and snuggled into her husband’s chest after drying her hands. He took her in his arms and kissed the top of her head.
- “Thank you,” she said, crossing her fingers that the miracle would finally happen.
All the conditions were perfectly reunited. Was she going to tell him? Maybe later, in the privacy of their bridal room. Unless she kept this information from him, in order to tell him only the final result. Well, she still had time to think about it a little.
#Criminal Minds#criminal minds fanfic#hotchley#aaron hotchner#haley hotchner#hotch#hotch x haley#mentioningmargins#writing challenge#code name mom#lovers
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Who Are You Again?
Based on the following ask: I had another plot thought! Aaron x BAU Reader (female or gender neutral) where Reader disobeys an order to save a victim and gets hurt really bad. Reader wakes up in the hospital to Aaron who is angry at first but then is shocked when it turns out that Reader has retrograde amnesia from the injury. Reader has forgotten their entire career in the BAU and even that They and Aaron were secretly dating! Last thing Reader actually remembers was attending a lecture in college where Aaron was a guest speaker and Reader developed a crush on him! Now Aaron has to carefully navigate helping Reader recover without outing their relationship to anyone else. Or maybe he wonders if it's better they forget? But for a HEA ending definitely Aaron doing something romantic sparks a memory and helps everything come flooding back. @nyxwolph thank you for requesting again and trusting me with your ideas! – I did have to change things up a bit (I struggled big time with this one)
Aaron Hotchner x BAU! Fem Reader
Angst/Fluff
Word count: 5336
REQUESTS ARE OPEN - not edited - please be kind. Requests are open and feedback is welcome if it's constructive!
Warnings: My blog is 18+, minors DNI, age gap, some language, BAU canon typical violence, mention of parent death, mention of kidnapping, mention of Haley and Jack, secret relationship, let me know if I missed any!!
That being said I do not own the characters portrayed in this story.
“In chaos theory, the butterfly effect is the sensitive dependence on initial conditions in which a small change in one state of a deterministic nonlinear system can result in large differences in a later state.” Essentially, something as small as a butterfly flapping its wings could cause something as catastrophic as a tornado.
Aaron wondered what small event happened that led to this moment right now. A moment that would change the trajectory of your lives forever.
*36 hours earlier*
“Garcia has the unsubs location; he’s headed down a backroad just east of the 95.” Aaron said.
“He’s devolving, he’s probably going to try and dispose of his latest victim.” Morgan chimed in.
“Not if we have anything to do with it.” JJ replied.
“His location is being shared with you all, everyone be safe, at this point he’s going to be willing to do anything to avoid prison.” Hotch added.
“I’m close by, I am going to go try and cut him off.” You suggested.
The team expressed their worry and care and urged you to be careful. The only thing you had on your mind, however, was saving the five-year-old boy this unsub had hidden. You drove as fast as your vehicle would allow, you had to get to the unsub. You had to save that boy.
As you got closer to the location Garcia had shared, you could see the dust trail the unsubs car was leaving down the road. You thought about your options, and you made a snap decision. Drive on, no matter the consequences – take out the unsub’s car. So that’s what you did.
You drove forward and your car t-boned the unsubs, only you hadn’t considered that he’d be driving a semi tractor. Upon impact, your SUV was crushed, in your rush to get to the unsub you’d forgotten to put on your seatbelt and your body was ejected through the windshield.
The accident was enough to stop the unsub long enough for the team to arrive. As they surveyed the scene, Aaron’s stomach dropped. He immediately began barking orders, demanding medics, and sending agents to the unsubs’ farm to find the boy. Throughout everything he refused to leave your side.
*Present Day*
“Sir, we had to place her in a medically induced coma to allow the swelling in her brain to go down.” The doctor explained.
“Is there an estimate as to how long it’ll be until she wakes up?” Aaron asked.
“With these kinds of injuries, it’s hard to say. The brain is a tricky thing, and no two injuries are alike. We just have to wait and see.”
“Thank you.” Aaron said, shaking the doctor’s hand.
Your doctor made her exit and Aaron moved to the seat beside your bed. He gently took your hand in his own placing a kiss to the back of it before returning it to your side. Aaron had thought back to the night everything changed.
*One year earlier*
“Hey Hotch, here’s that report you asked for. You aren’t staying are you?” You asked, glancing at your watch.
“Thanks, and yeah I had a few things I needed to finish up.”
You made your way over to Aaron’s couch, dropped your bag to the floor, and shrugged your jacket off. You pulled your phone out to see what was still open for delivery in the area. Aaron and you had shared many nights like this, spending late nights together in his office. The two of you had grown very close over the years, so much so that David had outright asked Aaron if you two were dating. To which Aaron let out an awkward chuckle and denied the accusation. If only he knew.
“What are you doing? You should head home.” Aaron said.
“Well, you should too, and you aren’t, so I guess that means we’re ordering dinner.” You smiled at him.
“I love you.” Aaron said simply.
“What?” You were stunned.
“I’m sorry, that was inappropriate. I didn’t – I um….”
“Say it again.”
“I love you.”
“I love you too.”
Aaron made his way over to you, gently caressed your face and kissed you. It was everything you had ever imagined. There had been this tension between the two of you over the last two years and it was all finally coming together.
After that night, Aaron and you had agreed to keep your relationship under wraps, to avoid any potential disruption to the team, but also any question as to your position on the team. Aaron didn’t want anyone to question the fact that it was your skills and resume alone that got you to where you are.
Yours and Aaron’s relationship blossomed after that night, but not without hardships. Aaron and you faced a lot of adversity in multiple aspects of your relationship; you had a hard time trusting people, Aaron had been self-conscious of your age gap, and you both couldn’t help but feel that you weren’t good enough for the other (not that either of you would bring it up).
*Present Day*
A tear fell from Aaron’s eye, he couldn’t fathom losing you. This was all part of the reason he didn’t want to get serious with someone after Haley, but then you came into his life. You’d come in and made yourself known with your kind eyes and witty charm; how could he not fall in love with you.
Aaron fell for you slowly then all at once, it came naturally, and he couldn’t help it. He knew that the team had their suspicions and honestly over the last year there had been some close calls, but you had ultimately maintained the secrecy of your relationship.
In this moment, Aaron couldn’t help but feel a pang of guilt and regret over the fact that he’d asked you to keep things quiet. Had he let the team in on your relationship, he could’ve done a better job at keeping you safe.
*2 Weeks Later*
Aaron had been by your side as much as possible over the last two weeks, which is exactly where he was when you started to stir. Aaron shot straight up in his seat, his hand quickly reaching for your own.
You couldn’t help the groan that escaped your throat, your body hurt so bad, and you felt very confused. You attempted to open your eyes but immediately regretted it – the bright fluorescents adding to the pounding in your head. As you blinked through the brightness of the room, you glanced over to your bedside, noticing a tall man seated there.
“What on earth were you thinking? Driving into the unsub like that, you could’ve been killed. Your actions were reckless and unacceptable.” The man scolded you.
You couldn’t find it in you to reply, your head was pounding. You brought your hand up to your forehead and gently press the heel of your palm into it, hoping to alleviate some of the pressure.
“Sweetheart hold on, I’ll go get your doctor.” A deep voice sounded from your bedside.
Before you could question the pet name, you heard the sound of his dress shoes clicking against the linoleum floors.
The man returned with your doctor; he dimmed the lights slightly on his way back to your bedside. He moved to grab your hand again, to which you shifted, wringing your hands nervously in your lap.
“Hello, I’m doctor Raynor. How are you feeling?”
“Like I was hit by a truck, what happened?” You questioned, giving your doctor and the man a once over.
You recognized the man; it was Special Agent Hotchner of the BAU. What was he doing here? What happened?
“Well, you were involved in an accident, can you tell me what you remember?” Dr. Raynor inquired.
“I um, well, I was leaving a lecture.” Your gaze shifted to Agent Hotchner “Your lecture actually, you were talking about MO’s. I guess the accident was after that?” You couldn’t help but notice Agent Hotchner’s expression faulter.
Your doctor looked over at Agent Hotchner and he shook his head. The two of them seemingly knew something you didn’t. You couldn’t help but feel like you’d just given the wrong answer in front of the class. Dr. Raynor had gone through the rest of your injuries with you, multiple lacerations that had required stitches, a few broken ribs, a broken wrist, and of course your TBI. Once she was done she gave you a somber look.
“Would you excuse us for just a moment? I am going to send in one of your nurses to check you over and I’ll be back in just a moment.” Dr. Raynor said.
“Oh, okay.”
Dr. Raynor and Agent Hotchner left your room, and you tried your best to listen to their conversation.
*Hotch’s POV*
She doesn’t remember me, well us. It’s like the last five years have just disappeared.
“Agent Hotchner, I gather that the lecture she’s referring to did not occur two weeks ago when she was brought in.”
“No, that lecture was nearly five years ago.” I explained.
“This would be a case of retrograde amnesia, if she’s lost recent memories.” Dr. Raynor replied.
“Will her memory return?”
“It’s hard to say.”
While Aaron was completely devastated, he couldn’t help the doubt that creeped into his mind, telling him “This is for the best”.
*Normal POV*
Dr. Raynor and Agent Hotchner looked extremely serious, and you started to feel nauseous. Something was obviously wrong. You watched as their conversation ceased and they made their way back into the room.
Something must have happened, why would Agent Hotchner be here.
“Alright, it would appear that due to the brain trauma you sustained in your accident, you are experiencing what we describe as retrograde amnesia. This is when you can’t recall memories from your past. Based on your most recent memory, it appears as if you’ve lost approximately five years.” Dr. Raynor explained.
“Five years? Five years of memories are just gone. I don’t understand. If that’s true then why are you here?” You asked gesturing to Agent Hotchner.
“Well, you work for the BAU. You have for about three years now.”
“I do? I – I, this is a lot. What does this mean? Have you called my emergency contact?” You asked.
“I uh – I am your emergency contact.” Agent Hotchner spoke up.
“What, why? It has always been my mom, I don’t understand.”
“I’m so sorry, your mom, she uh – she passed last year. That’s when you switched it over to me.” Agent Hotchner’s gaze shifted down to his shoes.
“She’s gone?” Your voice cracked.
“Okay, this has been quite a bit of information. The most important thing right now is getting healthy. We want to keep you here a little longer to continue monitoring the swelling in your brain. Once we’ve confirmed it has gone down, you’ll want to get back in your usual routine, that is the best shot at getting your memory back.” Dr. Raynor gently patted your leg.
“How am I meant to get back to my normal routine when I don’t know it? The one person I had, I just found out is dead.”
“Given that Agent Hotchner is your emergency contact, we would be able to release you into his care. For now, we just need to stay positive.” With that, Dr. Raynor made her exit.
“I know this is a lot, but the BAU, we’re like a family, that includes you. Each member of the team is going to be willing to do anything to help you throughout this process.” Agent Hotchner said.
Part of you knew you could trust him; he had kind eyes, and you knew he was genuine. However, the other part of you felt so hopeless, like a lost kid in a department store. How were you meant to go home with this man who you didn’t know.
*Five Days Later*
“Do you have everything?” Aaron asked.
He had been with you every day for the last five days. He had brought you some things from your apartment and asked you to call him Aaron for now while you were “getting to know him”. You had to admit, it had been pretty nice talking with him the last few days.
“I think so!” You looked over at him. “I know that I am meant to be staying with you, at least until I’m fully healed, but could we go to my apartment first? I’d like to see it and maybe go through some of my things?”
“Of course we can.” Aaron nodded, gesturing towards the door.
The drive to your place was filled with small talk, mostly you asking Aaron questions about the BAU and the time you’ve spent there. It felt weird asking the man who is technically your boss about your personal life.
When you arrived, Aaron made sure to open your door for you and carry your bag into your home. He led you inside and you couldn’t help but notice how comfortable he seemed in your place, like he’d been there before. Like he belonged there. You shook the thought from your mind.
“I got you a new phone, it’s all set up for you.” Aaron said handing you the device.
“Thanks! Were they able to back up the old one? I was hoping to go through old texts and pictures to gather some insight into my life. God that sounds weird.” You huffed out a breath.
“I have our technical analyst Penelope Garcia working on that for you.” Aaron informed you.
“That’s great, thank you.”
The truth was, Aaron didn’t have Garcia backing up your old phone, at least not yet. He knew that if he had brought it to her she would uncover all the private texts and photos that you two had shared over the last year. He didn’t want to risk everyone finding out about your relationship, especially now when he wasn’t sure what your future would hold.
Aaron watched you as you made your way around your apartment. You wandered slowly around letting your fingers graze the spines of books on your shelves, picture frames on the walls and tchotchkes that were strewn about your desk and shelves.
He so badly wanted to pull you into his arms, kiss your head and tell you that everything was going to be okay. He wanted you to know that he wasn’t just your boss. But he also thought about all the things that could go wrong if he told you. You could question your own ethics and fall into self-loathing with the thought that you’d potentially slept your way to the top – this was the furthest thing from the truth, but he knew you and the way your mind spiraled. He wondered if it would just be easier if he let you find yourself all on your own, to let this thing between you go and hope that maybe you’d find your way back to him again.
When he looked over to you once again, he saw that you had found a photo album. It was one he was very familiar with; Garcia had gotten it for you on your 1-year BAU anniversary and filled it halfway. Since then, you’d continue to add to it all the photos you’d taken with the team.
You hadn’t realized you were crying until a tear had fallen onto the picture you were currently examining. Your emotions were running high, looking through the album was so strange it felt like looking at a stranger and yet it was you in photo after photo looking happier than ever with these people you couldn’t remember.
You felt the couch dip beside you and Aaron gently rubbed his hand up and down your back.
“I can’t imagine how overwhelming this all must be. I know that I can’t understand but I am here for you and I’m happy to lend an ear if you want to talk about it.” Aaron quietly soothed you.
“Thank you so much Aaron. I just don’t know how to wrap my head around this being me but not remembering it. Clearly you all mean so much to me and yet I have no recollection of any of this.” You sobbed.
Aaron and you sat like that on your couch for a while. He gave you the time you needed to calm down, while holding you, whispering sweet nothings to you. You felt oddly comfortable there in his arms, your mind shifted to the thought that enjoying the way his arms felt around you was also incredibly inappropriate given that he was your boss. At that thought you shifted slightly. You thought back to why you had signed up to audit Aaron’s lecture and while the main reason was the knowledge he’d lend you, a part of you allowed his looks to give you that final push in signing up.
“I should probably grab a few things so we can head out.” You whispered.
“Do you need any help?” Aaron asked.
“I should be okay, but I’ll let you know!”
Aaron drove the two of you back to his apartment, for the time being he had asked Jessica to keep Jack, this way you could adjust, and Jack also wouldn’t out your relationship. Aaron had his guest bedroom set up for you, he’d set it up with some of your favorite things. A lavender scented candle, extra pillows, a fluffy blanket, and he made sure to set a small trinket dish on the dresser, so you’d have a place to put your jewelry.
These of course were all things Aaron had previously had at his place for you. When you two had gotten increasingly more serious, he encouraged you to leave some stuff at his place and he’d gone as far as to supply some of your favorites around his home for you.
Aaron led you into his home and you couldn’t help but glance around, really taking in your surroundings. You couldn’t help but take note of a few things as he showed you around; there was a photo missing from the side table next to the couch (you could see the tiny bit of dust that must’ve collected around it), the pantry was stocked with quite a few of your favorite snacks, there was a pink coffee mug in the cabinet, and lastly, tucked under the shoe rack near the front door were a pair of fluffy gray slippers.
You couldn’t explain why, but there was a slight pang of jealousy in you as you thought of Aaron having a girlfriend. You knew you had no right to feel that way and it would be incredibly inappropriate, but it was a gut reaction.
*One Week Later*
Aaron and you had fallen into a weird sort of routine, it started to feel a lot like the 50’s, you making dinner and cleaning while he worked. You were starting to get a bit stir crazy, which is exactly why you were so excited today. Garcia would be coming by to see you; she was bringing over a bunch of photos and videos of you with the team throughout the last three years.
It was a paperwork catch-up day for the BAU, so Aaron had given Penelope the go ahead to take a long lunch and spend some time with you. So, when a knock on the door rang through the apartment, you couldn’t help the burst of excitement that coursed its way through your veins.
“Hi Penelope!”
“Hey babe! How are you feeling?” She asked, giving you a look of concern.
“I’m feeling pretty good, you know, except for the missing five years of memories thing.” You let out a low chuckle.
“Oh goodness! Well, I’ve brought a ton of stuff that might help bring some stuff back. I read that sense of smell is the sense that links with memories the strongest so have a bunch of things for you to smell while you look at photos in hopes something will come back to you.”
“That sounds like a great idea!” You smiled at Penelope.
The next hour or so went by with Penelope showing you photos and videos along with passing you various items to smell in hopes of bringing back some of your memories. And while it wasn’t like a wave crashing over you, bringing all your memories back, it did bring some things back. You could remember the members of the BAU and some of their quirks, you remembered the feeling of being in the bullpen (thanks to the smell of some very burnt coffee). What you were struggling to regain was your emotional memories, you couldn’t quite pinpoint the relationships you had with anyone from the team.
“I am glad that this helped! I should probably get out of your hair though; I can tell you have headache.” Penelope
“Thank you Penelope, I really appreciate all of this!”
You led her to the door, and she reminded you to get some rest and to take it easy. She also suggested that you come by the BAU for lunch in the next week or so to see everyone. The team had been doing a good job of not overwhelming you and allowing you time to get back in the swing of things.
“Oh, Penelope before you go, did you get a chance to back up my old phone? Aaron said you were working on it.”
“Oh, hon. He must’ve forgotten to mention it, but I will get started on that right away! I’ll text you as soon as I’m done, okay? We will just be able to pull the backup and put it on your new phone!” She said pulling you into a tight hug, before making her exit.
Why would Aaron have lied to you about your old phone? Maybe Penelope was right, and it just slipped his mind, he had been dealing with a lot, taking care of you, and having you stay with him.
You hadn’t meant to snoop, honestly, but after having talked with Penelope, the feeling Aaron was hiding something from you was extremely prevalent. You decided to look around a bit, you know, while putting the laundry away. You needed to put the towels away in Aaron’s bathroom, you just happened to notice the second toothbrush in the holder, the dress hanging inside his closet (come on, the door was already open), the ring box tucked in his sock drawer, what shocked you the most were the photos in the hall closet. It was a photo of him and a tall brunette that had you spiraling, where was this woman? You had clearly been invading his space long enough and you couldn’t bear the thought of coming between him and this woman who was to be his fiancé.
You needed to get back to your life, and out of Aaron’s hair. You decided that you’d tell him that night over dinner, you were going to move back home.
“Hey, I’m home!” Aaron called.
“Hey, how was your day?” You asked.
Aaron explained that his day was good, and he asked you about your get together with Penelope as you finished up dinner. Aaron set the table as you followed behind him plating up the food.
“I’m glad to hear things went well with Penelope. I think lunch with the team is a great idea.”
“Aaron I’m gonna move back home.” The words flew out of your mouth faster than your brain could catch up. “I’m sorry, I just don’t want to impose on your life any more than I already have.”
“It’s truly not an imposition, but if that’s what you want.” Aaron looked deflated.
“I just think it’s important we both get back to our usual every day.”
“If you think that’s best.”
You two ate in silence. Afterwards you both went to the kitchen, cleaned up the dishes and made your way to your separate rooms. You began packing up your belongings and Aaron scrolled through photos of the two of you from before the accident.
*Two Days Later*
“Good morning gorgeous!!! I am calling to inform you that the backup from your old phone is ready, and I also think it is the perfect day for you to come in and have lunch with everyone!” Penelope sang over the phone.
“Okay, what time should I come down there?”
“Ummm maybe around 12:30? Everyone is usually ready to eat by then. I can call and order in something too!”
“Oh, and uh Pen, I don’t know the address, and I’m not cleared to drive.” You said shyly.
“Oh shoot, okay! I’ll see who is available to come and pick you up, no worries.” Penelope reassured you.
You took some time getting ready, most of the team hadn’t seen you since before the injuries, and while the cuts and bruises have faded and scarred, you still had a very broken wrist and frequent headaches, along with PTSD and anxiety attacks thanks to the TBI. You felt like you had been doing well, and based on your recent check-up with your neurologist, things are trending up in regard to your health. Though you began to worry that the worst had yet to come.
A knock on your door shook you out of your thoughts, as you made your way to answer it, you wondered who Penelope sent to get you. Pulling the door open revealed someone you were hoping you wouldn’t see so soon.
“Hi Aaron.”
“Hello, were going to go pick up the food on the way back to the BAU, if that’s okay.” Aaron explained.
“Yeah, that’s fine.” You nodded.
The drive was filled with tense silence. You couldn’t help but wonder why Aaron would harbor any negative feelings towards you. You’d only moved out of his apartment so he could get back on to his life, if anything he should be grateful that you’ve gone home. One of the main reasons you’d really decided to go home was because of the fact that you were growing far too comfortable.
Things at Aaron’s house were starting to feel right, like it was where you belong. You had no idea how you had been able to work with him over the last few years, the crush you had on him all those years ago had only proven to grow stronger.
“I’ll run in and grab the food.” Aaron said, pulling you out of your thoughts.
Before you could reply, he stepped out of the car and made his way into the restaurant.
Aaron got you signed in with a visitor’s badge (as you weren’t cleared to work) and then he led you up to the sixth floor, BAU bullpen. Upon walking in, you felt an odd sense of familiarity. You knew that it would make sense for the BAU to bring memories back and that you would have muscle memory to help lead you through the building, but it felt very strange.
You looked over at Aaron, “I need to go see Garcia, do you mind pointing me in the right direction?”
“Of course, her office is that way. Second door on the right.”
“Thanks.” You smiled.
You wandered through the corridor, catching a glimpse of Garcia through her open door. You lightly knocked on her door and walked into her office.
“Oh! Hello gorgeous!” Garcia squealed, standing, and pulling you into a hug.
“Hey Pen!”
“Let’s get your phone squared away and then we will go eat.”
You handed your phone over to Penelope and she began downloading the last backup from your old phone.
“This should only take a few minutes.”
Penelope and you made idle chit chat for a few moments while waiting on your phone. When it finished uploading, she unplugged it and handed it to you. The two of you then made your way to the bullpen.
Lunch with the BAU was overwhelming to say the least. It was fun talking to everyone, but you could tell everyone was walking on eggshells and you could see the pity flash behind their eyes as you sat and explained your lack of memories with the people sitting before you.
After lunch, Aaron let everyone leave early. It had been a paperwork day and the team had been very productive. He told them all to go home, but of course to leave their phones on, just in case they had to leave. Emily offered to drive you home, given the close proximity of your apartments.
When you got home, you changed into some comfortable clothes and sat on the couch. You took a deep breath and unlocked your phone. There were two things you noticed while going through everything, the first being a significant number of photos saved and the second being the texts exchanged between you and your boss.
You decided to go through the photos first. There were plenty of you with the various members of the BAU, but what caught your attention was one image in particular, in it, you were laid in bed with your head resting on a man’s chest…the man being none other than Aaron.
You quickly switched over to your messages app. Clicking Aaron’s name, you saw the most recent text…
“Be careful sweetheart. I love you.”
Your mind was racing, what were you meant to think, why would he keep this from you? Was the ring meant for you? You needed to see him.
You ordered an Uber and made your way to the FBI building. You signed in, getting a visitors’ badge and headed up to the sixth floor.
“Aaron” You called out into the bullpen.
“Is everything okay? What are you doing here?” Aaron asked as he walked out of his office.
“Why didn’t you tell me?”
“Tell you what?” Aaron questioned.
“That we were together.”
You gestured to your phone. Aaron dropped his gaze for a moment, before looking back to you. You could see the pain behind his eyes.
“Sweetheart, we had been keeping it a secret, and I don’t know, I guess I thought that maybe you’d be better off. I figured you might find someone more appropriate for you.”
“That wasn’t a choice for you to make. Aaron things have been confusing enough, losing my memory. But to have you lying to me, it’s total bullshit. How am I supposed to get my memories back if you are keeping such a big part of me a secret.” You couldn’t help the frustrated tears from slipping down your cheek.
Aaron reached for you and let his thumb brush the tear off your cheek. He stepped closer to you and brought his other hand to your cheek.
“I am so sorry. I should’ve told you from the get-go, I was scared. I thought that maybe I would tell you and you’d have to get to know me again and maybe you wouldn’t love me the way you did before. I also couldn’t help but think that I don’t deserve you and this was your perfect out. But that was selfish, I should’ve told you the truth.”
You leaned your head onto Aaron’s chest, and he wrapped his arms around you. He pressed a gentle kiss to your hairline and then he pulled back.
“Can I show you something?” Aaron asked.
You nodded and followed him to his office. Aaron led you around his desk and gestured for you to sit in his chair. He pointed to his computer screen, and you took note of the screen saver. It was a slideshow of pictures taken throughout your relationship, there were pictures of you at the FBI Gala, Jack’s soccer game, art museums, at Aaron’s home, at your apartment, etc..
It happened slowly, then all at once. A warm feeling flooded your veins, and a dull ache filled your head. Tears were steadily streaming down your face. You looked up at Aaron, and he met your gaze. A moment was shared before understanding washed over Aaron.
“I remember.”
#aaron hotchner#aaron hotch hotchner#hotch#aaron hotchner fic#aaron hotchner x reader#ssa aaron hotchner#criminal minds#aaron x reader#hotch x reader#hotch x you#hotch x y/n#emily prentiss#penelope garcia#spencer reid#david rossi#derek morgan#jennifer jareau#criminal minds fandom#thomas gibson#jack hotchner#jessica brooks#haley brooks#haley hotchner#aaron hotch x you#aaron hotch x reader#aaron hotch imagine#aaron hotch fluff#aaron hotch fic#aaron hotch fanfiction#aaron hotchner x you
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#sorry not sorry#criminal minds#criminal minds fanfic#spencer reid#spencer reid fluff#criminal minds fluff#criminal minds x reader#luke alvez#emily prentiss#bau x reader#dr spencer reid#just saying#aaron hotch x reader#aaron hotch hotchner#aaron hotchner#hotchniss#aaron hotchner smut#thomas gibson#jack hotchner#haley hotchner#criminal minds fic#cm incorrect quotes#incorrect criminal minds quotes#spencer reid fanfiction#doctor spencer reid#jennifer jareau#penelope garcia#derek morgan#david rossi#jj jareau
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atlas do you think you could write a platonic BAU reader piece with hotch on fathers day? reader is he/him and disowned by parents and just doesn’t want to think about his old man that day but then he realises that hotch is his sort of surrogate dad at work? and they just have a nice day together while jack and Haley are in witsec and it just really heals both hotch and reader to be able to do something nice that day. I love your writing but no pressure. 🤍
This was such a cute idea! Thank you for sending it to me!!! I hope you like what I did :)
Warnings: mentions bad dads, Jack and Haley being in witsec
It doesn't hit you until just before your lunchbreak that you have a dad. Well, a sort of dad. One that didn't disown you or make you feel less than the shit on his shoe. It was one that gently guided you in the right direction, one that gave you small smiles of encouragement despite his usual stern demeanor. It was one who would always buy you a muffin and a coffee in the morning because he knows you wake up late and always miss breakfast and he knows you won't be able to function without a coffee. It was one who made sure you knew he cared about you through extending report deadlines, making you take mental health days, driving you home after work because he wanted to make sure you got home safe.
It didn't matter if Hotch wasn't your dad by blood, because he was in every other way. You take an earlier break, making sure that it's okay with Hotch before you rush off to the store. You browse the cards, trying to find the perfect one - you didn't want to overdo it, he already had a son anyway. You just wanted to show him that you cared.
You fill it out before you even start eating your food - you wanted to get it done. So you write down your thoughts, how despite being your boss, he was also like your father.
When the card was finished, you ate. Now that the main task was over, you could relax and enjoy your food and not worry about his reaction to the card until you had finished eating (although, based on your shaking leg and nervously looking around, the rule didn't really stop your body from getting anxious).
When you had finished eating, you made your way back to the BAU. You gave everyone a small nod of acknowledgement but headed straight to Hotch's office, giving the door a small knock.
"Come in," You take a deep breath before entering the room, giving Hotch a small smile as you walked in, holding the card behind your back.
"Hi," You gave a small nod.
"Is everything okay?" He asked gently.
"O-oh, er yeah," You nodded, brushing your hand over the back of your head, "I just- I wanted to give you something and I really hope it's not weird but-"
Hotch gave you a small smile, "You're okay, (Y/N), everything's fine, what was it you wanted to give me?"
You hand over the envelope silently - hoping that Hotch doesn't notice how your hands are gently trembling (he does but doesn't comment on it).
"What's this?" He asks quietly, turning the envelope over with gentle hands as he opens it, starting to pull out the envelope.
"A Father's day card." You said, cheeks beginning to tint pink. "I, er, I know you have Jack and I'm not actually your son, but you're my work dad, so it felt fitting,"
Hotch looked at you, a smile ghosting over his lips. "Thank you," His voice was genuine as he spoke, "This means a lot to me."
"You mean... you're not totally freaked out by it?" When Hotch shook his head, you relaxed, "Oh thank God... I had gotten it into my head that you were gonna completely freak or something - no offence,"
Hotch gave a short laugh, "None taken." There was a small pause, "You should probably get back to work, (Y/N), but... thank you for this, really." He gave you a smile (which you returned).
"Yeah, okay," You gave a nod, exiting the room.
When you had left the office, Hotch gave a small smile to the card, before he placed it on his desk, next to a photo of Jack and Haley.
'To Hotch,
I know you're not my dad (by blood at least) and I hope I'm not overstepping here, but you're the closest to a dad I've had. Ever. I just thought that maybe it would be a good thing to let you know. I know you're having a hard time with Jack and Haley being gone for a little while, but we'll get them back. I know we will. Until then, we've got to keep our chins up because we will get them back. I know it.
I just wanted to thank you for everything you've done for me (and the team). So:
Happy Father's Day.
(Y/N) - your (favourite) agent
P.s. can we keep this from Morgan and Prentiss? They'd probably tease me for life if they ever found out about this.'
#criminal minds#aaron hotchner#derek morgan#criminal minds fanfiction#emily prentiss#x male reader#david rossi#spencer reid#jennifer jareau#haley hotchner#aaron hotcher#jack hotchner#male reader#reader#aaron hotchner x male reader#familial#fatherly hotch#hotch x male reader#hotch x reader#aaron hotchner fluff#aaron hotchner fic#aaron hotch x reader
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4 AM
Credits: prompt idea from @foxy-eva Criminal Minds Writing Challenge! Hurt/Comfort prompt: Nowhere else to go: Person A didn't know where else to go in a time of need, so they ring B's doorbell. Betaing credits to @doctorstethoscope and @greg-montgomery- I would never post anything if you guys didn't tell me to <3
Pairing: Aaron Hotchner x Haley Hotchner (post-slash?), Aaron Hotchner & blank slate Fem!Reader (no use of y/n) (platonic-ish)
Word Count: 3.4k
Warnings: Unrequited love, discussions of divorce and parenting, Hotch's take on Haley leaving him, big sexy man cries a little, mentions of cases, angsty
A/N: I'm back with a song fic about Hotch's marriage crumbling, because apparently that's the only thing that can drag me out of my burnout era. Inspo song is 4 AM by Cate, and I highly recommend giving it a listen!!
Yes, this is angstier than I meant for it to be. Yes, I'm already working on a part 2 :)
Find it on ao3 here, or under the cut. Happy reading <3
Next part | Series masterlist | My masterlist
Why don’t you come over?
It’s only friendship we’ll risk
You can cry on my shoulder
If it’s her that you miss
Are you thinking of me
In a new light?
‘Cause if not wе could pretend for the night, for thе night
“Why don’t you come over for a little bit tonight?”
“It… it doesn’t even matter–”
“How long is your drive?”
Aaron’s sigh into the phone receiver is audible. You can almost picture him right now, his face screwed up in frustration and two fingers pinching at the bridge of his nose. “I’m… not far. I’m at a motel twenty minutes from Quantico. She offered to stay at Jessica’s house, but… I don’t want Jack to know what’s going on.”
This certainly wasn’t the conversation you were expecting to have when you phoned your boss in the evening, intending to apologize for the late hour and let him know that you would be sending a file to him that would need to be reviewed first thing in the morning. You were expecting a brief, rushed call. You weren’t expecting him to pocket-answer the phone so that you had an accidental front-row seat to the sound of your boss checking into a motel room for one guest.
When he finally heard your voice calling out, “Aaron!” from his pocket and realized what was going on, he had bashfully explained; another fight with Haley, a bad one. You know that they’re all bad these days, but his admittance meant that it was worse than usual. It had ended with both of them packing bags, insisting that the other stay at their house, and Hotch driving off before she could.
You can’t pretend that you aren’t a little surprised that he shared all of this without much prompting. But now, you just want to see him and know that he’s okay. You just want to make this better… but how can you do that?
Maybe it’s not your place to get involved at all. You would be the first to admit that, sure, you have a minor crush on your very married colleague, and maybe that means that you should be staying away from his marital problems with a twenty-foot pole. But if he needs help, you’re certainly going to offer it.
“I don’t want to say it, but… do you really think Jack doesn’t know? You two have been having a lot of problems, and he’s a smart kid.”
“I know. I know. But it’s not… we can work it out. We can figure something out. There’s no need to stress him out or make him think that we’re going to get a divorce. I don’t want him put through all of that, for something that won’t happen.” The pain in Aaron’s voice is as audible as his words, and the sheer emotion behind it… it just breaks your heart.
It’s your turn to sigh now, letting your head tip back and rest on the back of your couch. “Are you sure you don’t want to come over? It’s really no trouble, I promise. I’ve got a guest room; you can stay as long as you need.”
Now, there’s a familiar firmness in his tone. It’s that decisive I-know-best voice he uses when he really believes in what he’s saying. “I’m sure. I appreciate the offer, but I’ll be home by tomorrow. We’ll work this out. I… appreciate you speaking to me about this. I’m sure it’s not why you called.”
If he could see you, you would wave a hand in the air as if to say, ‘Don’t worry about it’. “Anytime, Aaron. And that offer stands, you hear me?”
This standing offer of yours might be a bad idea. What if he takes you up on it? What if he comes over, seeking your company? Your conflicting feelings for him are easy enough to set aside at work, but if he’s coming over because of his rocky marriage that’s a whole other battlefield you don’t have a clue how to navigate.
Aaron loves his wife. You know that he does. He adores her and their son, right down to his nightly phone calls with them on cases and the picture of the two that he keeps in his go bag. But sometimes, on the occasional event that he relaxes around you, you can’t help wondering if he could ever think of you the same way he thinks of Haley.
He could, you’re sure of that. He’s a red-blooded man, and even though that’s a little cliche of you, you can’t help but wish he would think of you as more than a colleague. You’re a woman who sees him more often than his own wife does, and that’s got to count for something. Does he really just view you as a colleague and friend, or… does he ever view you as something more?
Sometimes, you think maybe he does. During your last case – an abduction in South Dakota – the two of you had been canvassing together down a busy street when a biker rode past. Aaron had noticed in the nick of time, pulling you in towards him and out of the way of harm. He loves his wife more than anything, and you know that he was just keeping you from getting hurt. But for a moment, for just a split second, you had let yourself imagine that it was a gesture of more-than-friends, that he was pulling you in because he wanted to be closer to you.
So maybe this offer is a terrible, awful idea. You can admit that it probably is, but at least he doesn’t seem to be taking you up on it.
“I hear you.” There’s a bit of a smile in his voice now, as though he knows how serious you’re being and he finds it amusing. “Thank you, again. Have a nice night.”
Before you can respond, he hangs up. With a sigh, you set down the phone. It’s starting to get late now; you might as well go to sleep if he’s not coming over.
–
When you wake up, your bedroom is completely dark. Your alarm isn’t ringing on the nightstand, and when you roll over in bed you read the time on the digital clock. 3:46 AM.
So what the hell woke you up?
Your answer comes in the form of a knocking sound, loud enough to get your attention without being an obnoxious pounding sound. The noise is coming from… somewhere, so you get out of bed and slip on a robe over your pajamas to find the source of the noise.
The hunt leads you to your front door, where that steady knocking is coming from the other side. Someone is knocking on your door, at the late hour, and in a haze of grogginess and confusion, you wrench the door open.
“What is- Aaron?”
He’s standing on your step, his hand raised like he’s ready to knock again. His face… god. His face is full of pain, unimaginably pure pain, and he nods at you. “Hi. I’m sorry, I… you were sleeping. I’m sorry. I didn’t…”
His voice breaks a little, and that’s when you reach out. With one hand on his shoulder, you steer him into the house and close the door. “Are you okay? You didn’t… what?”
When you guide Aaron to the couch, he sits down without hesitation. His voice is drenched with despair when he says, “I didn’t… know where else to go. You said that the, er, offer was standing, right?”
“What? Yes, of course, it is. Aaron, what’s going on?” You sink down onto the couch next to him, watching him inhale deeply like he’s trying to ground himself. The tiny part of you that preens when he says that he didn’t know where else to go… well, you try to fight that part back. Right now, the priority is Aaron. The priority is not your ridiculous, unrealistic crush on him. “I thought you were staying at the motel tonight and going home tomorrow.”
“I did, too. Haley texted me a little while ago. She… she told me that she wants to figure out a… custody agreement that recognizes her as Jack’s primary parent. She wants to… work that out before she gets her lawyer involved.” He gives you a sardonic little smile, one that fills you to the brim with empathy as he continues to speak. “Apparently, when she said she would stay at her sister’s house, she meant indefinitely. I can expect to be served the… papers in the next week.”
He says ‘papers’ in a bitter tone, like the very sound of the word puts a bad taste in his mouth. It’s not hard to piece two and two together, and you slowly reach for his hand. He lets you take it, and you give him a moment before you ask the question.
“You and Haley are divorcing?” Compartmentalizing this has to be one of the most strong-willed things you’ve ever done. This isn’t the time for your feelings and emotions to be anywhere near the surface; not when Aaron needs you like this.
At the d-word, he flinches a little like he’s been wounded. He obviously hasn’t come to terms with the idea of it yet, and you wonder how long it’s been since she texted him. “We aren’t divorcing. She’s divorcing me.” His correction is swift, and his voice is brittle; it feels like he’s close to shattering. Seeing him like this – so vulnerable, so broken – is completely alien to you.
“Aaron…” You don’t know what to say, so you squeeze his hand. In lieu of any other words, you ask the stupidest possible question. “How do you feel?”
He laughs a little, at that. It isn’t genuine, but it’s not a cruel laugh either. It’s a little bit cynical, a little disbelieving. “I just found out that my wife is leaving me. It’s 4 AM, and I’m tired, and I can’t go home. I don’t know how I’m supposed to feel, right now.”
“I know. I know, I’m sorry. It was dumb of me to ask.” You move a little closer to him, the couch cushions shifting under you until you’re almost pressed against him. “You can talk about it, if you want to. You can tell me everything that’s going through your head.”
Aaron takes another deep breath at that, and his hold on your hand tightens a little. “She isn’t happy. She hasn’t been happy, and we both knew it. I just… I didn’t think this would happen. I know she wants me around more- wanted me around, I suppose. Lately, most of our fights have been about work. Haley wanted me to leave the BAU, the Bureau if it came down to it, and I refused. And I can’t blame her for wanting a normal life, or wanting me to work at a 9 to 5, but… I can’t do that.”
His monologue has shaken every remaining ounce of grogginess out of your system. Aaron so rarely opens up, especially about personal matters. Listening to him talk like this, you could go all night long without a cup of coffee.
Come to think of it, coffee is a really good idea. Standing up, you give him a small, sympathetic smile. “I’m just going to make us some coffee. You look like you need it.”
The open-concept design means that you only move a few feet away to get to the coffeemaker in the kitchen, and you look over at Aaron as you scoop grounds into the basket. “Why can’t you leave the BAU?” Your question is soft, not accusatory.
He hears your tone, the general curiosity, and sighs. “When I was a lawyer, I prosecuted dozens of murder cases. By the time they reached my desk, it always felt like it was too late. And I wanted to, uh… stop them, before they got to my desk. We see a lot of things, you know? Jack… I don’t want him growing up in a world like this, with serial killers around every corner. I want to make the world a safer place for him. I suppose I thought that… I thought that because I’m doing it for my family, that would make it… easier for her to deal with.”
By the time Aaron finishes speaking, you’re handing him a cup of coffee. It’s sweetened with a bit of sugar and some cream; he usually drinks it black, but you know he considers any other kind of coffee to be a treat. If there’s ever been a time for him to deserve a treat, it’s now.
“You’re a good dad,” you tell him as you sink back down onto the couch with a mug of your own. “I know that you and Haley might have different ideas about what parenting should look like, but… you’re doing this because you love him. You want to protect him, and keep him safe and innocent. That doesn’t make you a monster for missing bedtime.”
It’s silent for a long moment; the only sound is both of you sipping your coffees, and then Aaron hums quietly. “I just… I never want him to know what kind of people are out there. He’s a little kid. I’m supposed to be there to tell him that there isn’t a monster under his bed. Instead, I spent his birthday in Mississippi looking for a guy who hunts his victims by actually hiding under their beds. I can’t blame Haley for being upset with me.”
You’re still trying to think of a response to that when he speaks again. His voice softens now, and when you glance over he looks away quickly. It’s not quick enough, and you still make note of the tears in his eyes that he’s obviously trying to hide. “We’ve been together since high school, you know. Graduation, college, law school… all of it.”
“I had no idea,” you murmur. You knew that Aaron and his wife were together for a long time, obviously. But to be together since high school? That’s a hefty chunk of time; it’s more than half as long as he’s been alive. “I’m sorry, Aaron. I… I can’t even imagine how you feel.”
“If it helps, neither can I. I don’t… I have no clue how I feel,” he admits, setting down the coffee cup. His gaze is still averted, but you can see the tears shining in his eyes. “Things haven’t been great for a while, and I know that. I’m not an idiot. But she’s always been there by my side, always. And now… she won’t be there, anymore.” His voice breaks a little on the last word, and it just… breaks your heart, all over again.
When you speak, it’s a little more tentative. Between his strict professionalism in the office and the reason for this impromptu 4 AM visit, you’re worried that you might be crossing some sort of line here. He’s got a wife at home; technically, he’s still married. That, and the reason for your offer is more selfish than you care to admit. But you don’t mind that as much as you probably should. After a pause, you say it.
“You can say no, but… do you want a hug?” Even as you ask the question, you start to get to your feet. Maybe to give him easy access, or maybe just so you can busy yourself with the coffee mugs if he says no.
A soft ‘oof’ escapes you when Aaron gets to his feet and hugs you tightly, like he’s just been waiting for you to ask. His arms wrap around your waist while your own come up to reach around him, rubbing his back gently in as reassuring of a manner as you can. Yes, your reason for this hug is selfish… It's selfish to take pride in the fact that you’re the one comforting him, reassuring him, and hopefully making him feel better.
You’re just about to let go – the guilt-ridden confliction of your emotions is almost too much to handle – when you feel and hear a sharp intake of breath against your shoulder, under your hand. It’s paired with the softest, most broken-sounding sob you can imagine. Aaron is trying to hold back that flood of emotion, that heartbreak that seems to surround him like it’s stuck alongside him inside an impenetrable bubble, and you tighten your grip on him a little.
“It’s okay,” you whisper, and you hope that you sound soothing. You hope that you can calm him, help him in some way. “You can let go, it’s okay. I’m here, I’m not going anywhere.”
Aaron doesn’t respond. He’s silent against you as his face presses into your shoulder, but his back moves under your hand when he takes in another deep, shuddering breath. It isn’t until he pulls away and lowers his head that you realize that the shoulder of your robe is soaked with tears that you couldn’t feel through the layers of fabric.
His head is still down, and he wipes at his face like he can’t stand to have tears running down it. “I’m sorry,” he says after a long moment, and he turns away altogether while he presumably collects himself.
You allow him this privacy, this pseudo-solitude to wipe his face and straighten his posture and do whatever else he can to recover from his moment of sheer, sheer vulnerability. He’s starting to turn back by the time you say, “Don’t be. You’re hurting, Aaron. I want to be here for you, however I can be. If you want to talk about how much you miss her, and cry on my shoulder…” you shrug one of the aforementioned shoulders, a gesture meant to play off the tension of the moment, “Well, I’ve got two of them, so feel free. Whatever you need, okay? That’s a promise.”
With a little nod, Aaron wipes a hand under both eyes again. “I understand. I really appreciate it… I appreciate you. Just having you here, with me… it’s helped more than you know.”
A tight smile graces your face, and you pat his forearm as you step back. The coffee is starting to wear off, and you can feel the exhaustion down to your bones. It’s on his face too, in his eyes and the way they’re growing heavy with the need to sleep. “Of course. We can talk more in the morning, but I think for now you should try to get some sleep. Okay?”
Aaron straightens up, and you don’t miss the way his jaw flexes as he tries to suppress a yawn. “I think you’re right. Thank you, again.”
“There’s no need to thank me,” you promise, leading him down the hall towards the guest bedroom right next door to yours. “Just get some rest, and… tomorrow can wait. Everything else can wait, for now.”
“It can wait,” Aaron agrees with a solemn nod, his voice quiet. He thanks you once again before you step away from the door, listening to it shut before you turn off all the lights and return to your own bedroom.
By the time you slip under your blankets, you can hear soft snores floating through the shared wall. It’s still hard to tell if you’ve overstepped, or if you’ve crossed some sort of line tonight. But for now… Aaron might have Haley in his head, but he’s fast asleep in your guest bedroom. You’re going to support him through this next stage of his life. Whatever the next few weeks or months may bring, you’ll be there.
You aren’t going to change his mind on anything. If he wants to contest the divorce, you’ll be there for him. If he wants to do it amicably, you’ll ask how you can help. If he realizes somewhere along the way that you could be the one for him, you certainly won’t argue.
You’ve already waited without hope for years. If he winds up single then maybe, just maybe, he’ll think of you in a new light one day. And if not… maybe you can just pretend he will, for tonight.
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#my writing#aaron hotchner#haley hotchner#aaron hotchner x fem reader#aaron hotchner x female reader#hotch x female reader#hotch x fem reader#hotch x you#hotch x reader#aaron hotchner x you#aaron hotchner x reader#aaron hotchner x reader fanfiction#aaron hotchner fanfiction#aaron hotchner angst#cm fanfic#criminal minds fanfic#criminal minds fanfiction#criminal minds angst#hotch fanfic#hotch fanfiction#aaron hotchner fanfic#Spotify
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Hey Rome! 👋🏽
What do you think about a Multiverse of Hotch’s? Like I have a pipe dream where maybe Aaron and reader aren’t together yet but maybe Haley from another universe shows Aaron what happens in other universes where they’re together and when they’re not? And it prompts Hotch to action to ask out and confess his feelings to his universe’s reader?
oh my god you're really appealing to the portion of my brain that was completely consumed by miles morales across the multiverse.
I can just see this, maybe Hotch is having a really fitful sleep one night and he takes something to help him sleep a little better, some melatonin or something, but then he finds himself in the strangest dream.
Suddenly he's staring at Haley, from four years ago, the last time they were happy together, and she's giving him a knowing look, AHH LIKE THE BARBIE SCENE, he walks over to her wanting to talk and the lighting is shifting colours around them in a big empty space, and she says "take my hand" and asks him why he's choosing not to be happy? he's so confused, he just doesn't understand what she's asking him.
She asks him what he thinks a soulmate is. He finds his answer easier than he had expected to, somebody who makes you feel whole. Somebody you can't imagine yourself without. Your hearts and your souls find themselves inextricably intertwined one day and then your whole view of the world shifts. They're the person who makes your world turn. He's thinking of Haley but she makes him close his eyes, and think about his life right now.
Who's the one person you want to run to when you're afraid, Aaron?
He knows his answer, Y/N. But he holds it back. It was supposed to be Haley, he thinks.
Who's the one person who can see right through your frowns and your guarded exterior, who can see the real Aaron no matter what?
Y/N, he thinks again. He feels bad this time, thinking about how even at their best, Haley could only see him the way he was when they had met, as they both grew up, she stopped being able to see him for who he was now. It freaks him out sometimes, actually, how the very moment in a social situation he realises nobody's asked him for his input in a while, your head will spin, take one brief look at him and ask him the exact question that flew through his mind mere moments before. You sweep him off of his feet with it, sometimes, he wonders at what point a person goes from profiler to psychic.
Aaron. Why aren't you letting yourself be happy with them, then?
Aaron can't help but think now that Haley was meant to be his soulmate, that was his chance at true love and he failed her. He's not sure he deserves another chance, and wouldn't it be wrong of him to love you without all of him in it? The pieces of him that died with Haley are holding him back. He doesn't want to offer you only the parts of him that remain.
"Close your eyes, Aaron." He obeys. His vision swims with a face much like Y/N's, only they're wearing a military uniform, muddied frags and dirt under their fingernails, but their smile is the same, bright, sunny sight he recognises from his sweetest dreams and from his warmest days at work, when he gets to spend time with you. You're growing smaller in his vision as the picture gets further away, he can now see you smiling at another uniformed officer, only this one... looks like him?
'He begins to wonder why Haley has brought him here when the image warps again, this time he can see you down at the beach, wearing a wetsuit with a surfboard under your arm, your hair is lighter here, and the uninterrupted sunshine makes your eyes sparkle even more. You throw your board down on the sand, turning to Aaron and motioning him to come closer. confused, he takes a step, but another surfer runs right by him, full speed towards the ocean, board under his arm. He turns as he runs past Y/N, smiling and calling out 'I'm gonna beat you!' It's him. Again. Your bubbly laugh erupts in his ears as you stagger to your feet, running after surfer aaron towards the crashing waves.
The next moment, Aaron finds himself standing in a quiet Parisian cafe, you're donning an apron and a frown as you sweep, picking up chairs as you go. Aaron wonders why you seem so sullen in this scene when he notices a man seated in the corner, even under a hat and thick framed glasses, aaron can see himself. He looks longingly at the server as he taps his fingers against the table, shaking his head and turning his attention back to his laptop, trying to go back to work. Aaron thinks he might be starting to see what's going on here as his vision changes again.
Now he sees himself, from just last week, when he came to visit Haley's grave, having felt guilty for not visiting in so long, he brought fresh cut flowers to replace the dried old ones left in the holder. Aaron can't help but notice the bags under his eyes, the slump of his shoulders. Every other Aaron he's seen today looked so full of hope or joy, but this one seems so plagued by guilt, weighed down by the shadows of his past.
Aaron's vision swims once more as he finds himself back where this dream began, his large hands are in haley's smaller ones as tears gather in his eyes, he looks around the previously empty space, seeing dozens of happy couples, some swinging a small boy between their interlaced hands as they walk, others are just basking in each other's embrace, quietly enjoying the others' company. Every couple looks like a slightly altered version of himself and Y/N. In some, aaron is younger, some older. One of the couples looks to be 95, a blanket draped over their legs as they both share the warmth of one armchair, a photo album in their laps. Even they look so happy.
"Aaron." Haley brings his attention back to her. he blinks away tears, looking at her.
"Soulmates will find one another in every universe, every time. Whether you take the leap to be with them, is up to you. But I wish you'd let yourself be happy, honey. I know there's obstacles, there always are, but obstacles are frightful things you see when you take your eyes off your goal. So keep your eyes on Y/N. Don't lose sight of what makes you happy."
A loud buzzing wakes Aaron up, he sees the tiniest sliver of sunlight rising over the horizon and entering his bedroom as he turns off his alarm. His chest is heaving and his eyes are still pooling with tears as he realises he's been holding himself back from you all this time. He's spent all of his time considering the past and none of it contemplating the fact that he can have a future.
That changes today. Today he's going to make the leap.
anon! I actually want to kiss you on the lips for giving me this idea! and i'm so willing to make it into a full fic if you wish me to but I just had to throw down my thoughts on this now bc my mind is spilling over with thoughts about this. I love those 'in every universe' posts i'm such a sap for destiny.
#anon mail!#rome's got mail!#aaron hotchner#criminal minds#haley brooks#aaron hotchner x reader#aaron hotchner x y/n#aaron hotchner imagine#aaron hotchner oneshot#hotch imagine#hotch oneshot#hotch x reader#hotch x you#aaron hotchner x you
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HotchReid the narcissist conversation
By the time of season 2, Hotch and Haley's fights had been a regular thing. Jack's one then, they started to need more bonding activities for the kid besides eating and bathing. Meanwhile, the team was struggling after the fisher king case.
Hotch and Reid had always hit off since the beginning. He was Spencer's mentor, senior, role model in many perspectives. But they also shared dry humor, nerd culture, old souls, and just overall respect and admiration for each other. That led to the many many debates and arguments just for the sake of knowledge and entertainment between them.
In one of the fights, Haley accidently called Hotch a narcissistic because his devote for the job and the title hero (she later then apologized because we all said horrible things in a fight, but the deed was done).
He couldn't let it go and it came up in a psychology discussion with Reid. He didn't out right say it, but Spencer could read between the lines that Hotch was seriously considered he was saving people for his own ego.
To Reid, Hotch was one of the most selfless people he'd ever known including Marie Curie. He just went out of his way, using all the data, statistics, observations, interactions he had of the man to defend Hotch against, well Hotch (he was too angry to track down where this thought had came from). He even dared to bring up the religious household and bottomline abusive childhood due to the outburst emotion. He did that with such passion, anger, and protectiveness Hotch had never witnessed in the past 5 years they'd worked together. Remember in the early seasons, Reid always approached the victims and suspects with this soft young innocent kind way of his, not the passive aggressive and confidence he's gained within the next years.
So at this point their relationship was still platonic and professional with a healthy dose of trust and connection. Therefore, they both was surprised by the blatant deep adoration Spencer just showed. While Hotch didn't know what to do with the butterflies set free in his stomach, Reid was confused and embarrassed. Let's say it's a strangely important moment for both of them. And that's how Reid was so sure Hotch would remember it and get his message. All that trust and hope ended up with the shortest hug Reid has had with the team throughout the 15 seasons but also the first he initiated.
"I knew you would understand."
#hotchreid#hotch x reid#headcanon#criminal minds#no hate to Haley#their marriage was such a great plot#i just miss them#and the implied depth of the team dynamics in the early seasons#ugh the feels#heid#aaron hotchner#spencer reid
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Criminal Minds | 1x01: Extreme Aggressor
#tvedit#cmedit#criminalmindsedit#aaronhotchneredit#criminal minds#aaron hotchner#haley hotchner#haley x hotch#mine#my gifs#mine: criminal minds#mine: haley x hotch
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Miss Haley Hotchner [Hotch x Reader]
Photo credits: Left (@happyheidi) Center (@ssamorganhotchner) Right (Press Coffee via their website)
Prompt: How the reader comes to have a friendship with Haley because of their shared interest in house plants.
Pairing: Hotch x gender-neutral reader. The reader uses they/them pronouns.
Category: Fluff and domesticity.
Word Count: 7.2K
Content Warnings: Brief mention of a case and unsub (kidnapping), mention of Aaron's abuse (beatings).
A/N: Good evening, loves! Today I give you a soft little domestic piece. I can imagine supporting you in your hobbies and passions, and this is just indulging in that fantasy. Full transparency the plant person in my family is my sister, not me, so if I get some stuff wrong about the plants, sorry. Here is another odd tie-in to Aaron. My sister was also in a production of Pirates of Penzance in the summer, so I’m familiar with the musical now. The song “Major General “ is very impressive. Even being in the chorus would be hard. I’ll link a video of it below the story. That’s what I’ve got. If you like the story, likes, comments, and reblogs are appreciated! I hope you have a great rest of your week! Love Levi - ❤️
P.S. The gang wanted some domestic Hotch yesterday, so I'm tagging y'all. I hope this helps: @hotchs-big-hands @sleeperwillow
List with all stories
_y/n_ = your name
_y/f/c_ = your favorite color
_s/o/c_’s = strands or curls
_y/f/c/d_ = your favorite coffee drink
_y/n_moved down the bustling street toward the upscale coffee shop. _y/n_ had half begged Aaron that morning to have him come with them in a voice that was laced more with sleep than wakefulness. _y/n_ had sleepily shifted their weight on top of his hips, straddling his body, hand pressing close to his chest. _y/n_ kissed his cheek and neck sloppily with half-closed eyes. Aaron had hummed gently, the sound rumbled in his chest and reverberated through _y/n_’s body. Hotch moved his head to the side and up a little to give her better access to his skin. While _y/n_ kissed him, his hands made their way to _y/n_'s lower back and the other to their left shoulder blade. Hotch put some pressure on these areas, warming them, as he stroked over the warm skin covered by the thin layer of their _y/f/c_ sleeping shirt. After a moment of his soft intimacy, Aaron spoke, saying, “It’s not going to work, _y/n_. I can’t go with you.” _y/n_ pulled back and pouted. They leaned down and kissed his warm lips before pulling back, now more awake after having spent some time against their lover. _y/n_ smiled and asked, “Why can’t you come with me? Just because you have a black thumb doesn’t mean you’ll kill anyone else’s plant.” Aaron chuckled; he knew that wasn’t fully true, but that wasn’t the reason why he couldn’t accompany _y/n_, and Aaron replied, “No it’s not my inability to keep a plant alive, it’s that Jack is coming over and we have soccer in…” Aaron turned his head to look at the clock on the nearby nightstand, he turned back to looking at _y/n_ and finished his sentence with, “two hours.” At hearing this, _y/n_ smiled and placed their head on his chest. Brushing their cheek against the dark hairs growing there. When their head came to rest on his breastbone, Aaron moved his left hand up the nape of _y/n_’s neck and into the base of _y/n_’s hair. He combed through the _s/o/c_’s in a repetitive motion. Sometimes Hotch thought of _y/n_ like a very affectionate cat. The way _y/n_ loved physical intimacy. Not just sexual intimacy, which they also enjoyed very much together, but there was a desire to just be close to Aaron that he hadn’t experienced in years. The last time he had been this open with his body with someone had been in high school with Haley. Back then, he had been seeking comfort for slightly different reasons.
Given the physical abuse he endured during his childhood, the near-daily beatings had left him vulnerable. Weary of touch. Any type of touch, not just intimate touch. When he had seen Haley for the first time, and they had shook hands, it was the first time he had welcomed someone to interact with his body in years. He had come to crave that feeling for her, and the fact that Aaron was so able to give and receive physical touch and intimacy with _y/n_ now was a testament to the healing and growth he had done over the years. _y/n_ never overdid it. They knew he had his limits, and that he could become a bit overwhelmed. It was their mutual understanding of the other that had made their relationship work. That and the fact that they were very open in their communication. If Hotch or _y/n_ did something that upset the other, they took the time to talk it out. Sometimes they had to take a break if the argument was bigger and more personal, but those tiffs were rare, and they managed to compromise. Sometimes, they even found those arguments had strengthened their relationship. Aaron was pulled back to the present as _y/n_ said, “I’m sorry I forgot Jack was coming. Maybe I can go next month, I haven’t seen Jack in what feels like a while.” Aaron moved up and kissed the tip of _y/n_’s nose and replied, “You don’t have to darling. I know you’ve been looking forward to this plant swap for a long time. And, you saw Jack last week, remember? We picked him up and dropped him off at Haley’s.” _y/n_ made a small, disappointed sound. Aaron wrapped his arms around them and said, “Plus, I don’t blame you for not remembering. Haley called me late last night asking if I could watch him. You were already half asleep. Like you are now.” He said the last point in a joking manner. At this point, _y/n_ was fully awake. One of Aaron’s favorite things to do was tease them that they were always tired. They were often yawning at home, but never in the office or field. Also in a teasing manner, _y/n_ picked up one of the pillows near the head of the bed. They gently hit Hotch on the chest, while he used his hands to block the blow. As _y/n_ raised their hands again, Aaron captured their wrists and used his legs and knees to strongly hold _y/n_’s waist. He rolled to his side then so that he was now on top of _y/n_ straddling their body.
The pillow fight was suddenly forgotten as he leaned down and captured _y/n_’s mouth with his own. Aaron intensified the kiss and when they moved apart for air, _y/n_ let out a small gasp. They said, “No fair using your strength against me like that, A.” Aaron smiled, eyes twinkling with a playful desire. Hotch shifted his weight back so his upper thighs were resting against his calves and ankles. _y/n_ moved their arms up to support them. One hand held their weight and the other moved to stroke down their love’s sharp jaw. Hotch said, “I think you should go to your thing. You should have your own hobbies and interests. It’s good for you. And you can always see Jack after practice. Haley asked for us to watch him until 2:00 p.m.” _y/n_ smiled and said, “Okay. I’ll go. But if I have a good time then I am dragging you to it next month. I think you’ll like this coffee shop no matter if plants are involved or not.” Aaron gave _y/n_ one more quick kiss and said, “Of course, love. That’s a promise.”
_y/n_ wiggled out from Aaron’s body and he looked at them with affection as they put on pants and moved to the bathroom to get ready for the day. Hotch also got out of bed and moved to the kitchen to get some kind of breakfast and coffee started. After they had eaten, _y/n_ moved to get dressed and grab their bag. They and Aaron had had the “‘Let’s move in together talk together,’ but they were waiting for _y/n_’s lease to end and for Aaron to figure out one legally technical thing on his lease, so even though they spent most nights together at either’s space, they still technically lived separately. One of the things that _y/n_ hadn’t moved over to his place yet was their small house plant collection. It was small now, consisting of only five easy-to-care-for plants. Thus, they were going to need to make a pit stop at their place about a half hour away to pick up their propagation and the Pothos they were hoping to trade with the other plant enthusiasts at the swap. When _y/n_ had everything gathered, they moved and kissed Aaron and asked, “Should I meet you and Jack back here, or did you have plans after practice?” Aaron thought for a moment and said, “Jack’s been asking to go out to pizza recently, so I’ll ask him if he wants to do that today. I’ll text you what he decides.” _y/n_ smiled, nodded, and replied, “Alright, well I look forward to it.” Aaron nodded and stepped forward. He pushed the strap of their shoulder bag back up onto their shoulder, as it had started moving down their arm. He leaned down and kissed the top of _y/n_’s forehead, saying, “Drive safe please.” _y/n_ nodded and as Aaron opened the door for them _y/n_ said “I will. I always do.”
And that was why _y/n_ was walking to the coffee shop that was hosting its monthly plant swap. _y/n_ had parked down the street given it was a busy part of the city. Ss _y/n_ stepped inside the shop, the interior was perfect for plant people as it looked like a mini greenhouse or even smaller arboretum. The walls and ceilings of glass allowed the soft light of the sun in. _y/n_ set their small plant offerings on one of the shared tables next to a man who had much more impressive plants on show. _y/n_ hoped that there was someone as novice as them at growing plants. _y/n_ wasn’t ready for misters or grow light yet. Right now growing and maintaining the little indoor garden that they didn’t want to think about much more commitment than watering and opening the blinds for an hour or so in the morning. _y/n_ moved to the counter and ordered a _y/f/c/d_. _y/n_ moved back to wait for their order. They took the time to look over the room and see the rest of those holding plants, many of the people here for the swap were already chatting, clearly knowing each other already. _y/n_ didn’t mind this. They were new to the community, only having joined one Facebook group for plant owners in Virginia, and a Discord server about the care and maintenance of house plants in the North where the sun was less intense and the winters made it hard to keep certain plants alive. When _y/n_’s name was called, they moved to the counter. Just as they got their drink, the doorbell rang and _y/n_ looked over and their eyes went wide. Haley was walking through the door with a bag that appeared to have three plants inside. From the small tips of the growing material that could be seen from the lip of the bag, Haley’s plants were far more impressive than theirs. Haley looked over to the place where you ordered your drinks. As she did this, her eyes met _y/n_’s and Mrs. Hotchner’s eyes similarly went wide. Slightly awkwardly, _y/n_ raised their hand and gave a tentative smile. Haley mimicked their hand movement but didn’t smile per se. Even if Aaron’s ex-wife didn’t smile, there was a soft kindness in Haley’s eyes, and that set _y/n_ at ease. _y/n_ moved back to her spot at the table. It was a few minutes before someone more their speed entered the coffee shop. The woman had bright auburn hair. She wore a long skirt, a gold star belt, and a sleeveless top. The young free spirit was so magnetic that _y/n_ was intrigued. The woman was so different from the stiff shirts that _y/n_ experienced at the bureau that they wanted to just say hello to this person, even if she didn’t have any plants they wanted.
_y/n_ waited for the woman to get her drink and get settled on one of the communal tables. _y/n_ was very excited to see the woman pull out a healthy-looking snake plant. Internally _y/n_ punched the air, ‘Perfect,’ they thought! This was exactly their speed. _y/n_ grabbed their plant offerings and moved to sit across from the woman. The auburn-haired individual smiled, as _y/n_ sat down and said, “Hi!” The woman’s face was radiant. _y/n_ genuinely smiled back and said, “Hello. I’m so glad to see someone with plants that aren’t over a hundred dollars.” The woman nodded and said, “Tell me about it. You’re the first person to come here who has something I feel comfortable trading with. Are you new to the area? I’m Willow by the way.” _y/n_ extended their hand and said, “_y/n_, _y/l/n_, and to answer your question, I’ve lived here for a few years. I’m just new to the plant world per se.” Willow nodded and replied, “Well welcome. You’ll find most people here are unproblematic. Would you like to swap either a plant or a propagation I’d trade my Chinese Money plant for your Pothos. I don’t have one with those colors yet. It’s very pretty.” _y/n_ thought about it and then agreed to trade their plant for the Chinese Money plant. Willow asked, “So how did you hear about this meet-up? I’m in public relations and I’m always interested in how people come together around a shared hobby.” _y/n_ replied, “Well I got into plants when a friend gave me a pencil cactus as a gift. I really wanted to keep it alive because they were moving across the country for a new job. I had to do research and I found the community. Once my Google search results found out I was into plants now, things started popping up on all my social media, including this plant swap. I was a lurker for a long time, to be honest. It was my partner that encouraged me to finally come today.” Willow smiled at her and said, “We love a supportive partner. Go them. My poor girlfriend keeps half begging me to stop coming here given our house is now overrun with her cats and my plants. Space is at a premium.” _y/n_ giggled at Willow's statement and said, “Thankfully I’m not that deep into the hobby yet, but I know what you mean.” The pair talked for a while longer. Once Willow had finished her matcha latte, she stood and shook _y/n_’s hand saying, I hope to see you again next month! It was a pleasure meeting you.” They smiled back and replied, “Same here, Willow. Thanks for being so nice to me?” The woman flushed just a bit and then moved out of the shop.
Once Willow was out of the room, _y/n_ felt the hairs on the back of her neck prickled. Like someone was looking at them. _y/n_ had felt this on and off during the twenty-minute conversation they had with Willow. _y/n_ turned her gaze to where they knew Haley was sitting. Haley couldn’t turn her gaze away fast enough for _y/n_ not to catch her staring. Haley blushed a bit, embarrassed for being caught. _y/n_ looked at her phone. It was still only 9:30 p.m. Jack’s practice would have just started fifteen minutes ago. It would go for another two hours. _y/n_ decided to sit and have another drink. She could do that and still catch the last hour or so of the team’s drills and practice game. _y/n_ remembered Aaron’s comments in the morning that they deserved rest and hobbies, even if that was just enjoying a high-quality latte and people-watching. Also, something about Haley being here made them want to stay. Not that _y/n_ was trying to snoop or pry into Aaron’s ex-wife’s life. It was more like a desire to share this space with her. _y/n_ and Haley’s relationship was little. _y/n_ felt that they knew more about Haley than Haley did about them. Given that Aaron was an open communicator, he had detailed their relationship; its rise and eventual fall. What Haley knew about them was unknown. Of course, she knew that they were a part of the BAU. Perhaps because they and Aaron had gotten into a relationship it had felt like rubbing salt in a wound. _y/n_ hoped it wasn’t that way. They and Aaron had both waited a respectful time before they had admitted their feelings for each other. It had all been very proper, per Hotch’s standards as a boss and a gentleman. Being here with Haley felt like a good first step. Even if they didn’t speak at all.
As _y/n_ sat and watched the ebb and flow of traffic into the coffee shop, they watched as deals and trades were made with some normal and some exotic plants alike. It was a peaceful environment. However, now and then _y/n_ would look over to Haley. Haley was continually looking at her phone and the door. There was a slight look of concern on her face. After another few minutes, _y/n_ couldn’t take it anymore. _y/n_ stood and moved to sit next to Haley, no matter how uncomfortable or awkward the conversation was going to be. _y/n_ couldn’t let this person whom they were close to through Aaron be in distress, even if it seemed minor. Haley looked up at _y/n_ as they sat. She let out a small exhale. _y/n_ looked over Haley once more, the strained look was still there, and they said, “Mrs… Hotchner…” As soon as the title came out, they mentally face-palmed, thinking they should have thought about what to call Aaron’s ex before coming over. However, the words were out there, and they couldn’t take them back. So _y/n_ swallowed and continued, “I couldn’t help but notice you seem upset. Is everything okay? I know you asked Aaron to have Jack last night. Are you alright?” Given the nature of the job, _y/n_’s mind could go to bad places quickly. Partners and even ex-partners of FBI agents could become targets for bad people easily. At their comment, Haley gave a small, almost sad smile as she said, “You profilers man. Nothing escapes you, does it?” _y/n_ didn’t know how to respond to the rhetorical question. Thankfully, Haley filled in the silence, saying, “It’s nothing serious really. I’m waiting for this guy, Richard. He’s kind of a big deal in the plant world. I’ve been courting him on and off for months to come down and swap a small false bird of paradise propagation with me. He finally relented last night, thus the need for Aaron to look after Jack.” There was more to Haley’s words than she was letting on. Her use of the word, “court,” plus the need for her son to be absent at this meeting felt a bit clandestine. If there were romantic intentions, _y/n_ wasn’t going to bring it up. They had no right to comment. After all, they were romantically involved with her ex-husband. After another second, the door clinked open and Haley looked up anticipatorily. Her face lightened. It was clear that ‘Richard’ was with them now. In a moment of almost teenage girlhood insecurity, Haley asked _y/n_, “How do I look?” _y/n_ smiled and replied, “Stunning.” They weren’t lying. _y/n_ could see why Aaron had been attracted to Ms. Haley Hotchner nee Brooks. There was a small smudge of lipgloss just out of the lines of her mouth. _y/n_ pointed it out to her, and Haley said, “Thanks, _y/n_. You’re a lifesaver.” _y/n_ just smiled and moved out of their seat to give the two space. They didn’t stick around after that. It was one thing to be in the same room with Haley, it was another to crash a potential date of hers. It would be like Haley sitting on one of _y/n_’s and Aaron’s date night. The thought made them cringe.
As _y/n_ drove toward the park where Jack practiced soccer at every other weekend, they reflected on how funny it was that both they and Haley had this shared interest. When _y/n_ had revealed to Aaron that they had a small plant collection, he had asked, “Are you being serious?” For a second _y/n_ thought there might be a serious issue with this. They wondered if Hotch had some rare allergy to house plants or something bizarre like that. However, Aaron had clarified that Haley had also kept houseplants as well. This was when he had also revealed his black thumb to them. Similarly, even though _y/n_ wasn’t hardcore into theaters and musicals, they had friends who were, so they were obliged to know at least three musical lyrics at a time depending on the mood of their good old high school friends. So when Aaron had revealed that he met Haley because of a production of Pirates of Penzance, _y/n_ had naturally said, “Oh Gilbert and Sullivan. That’s cool!” Hotch had been dumbfounded. He’d never, in his life heard of the musical before, and here was _y/n_ with an apparent deep knowledge of the old opera. _y/n_ had reassured him quickly that they hadn’t stalked his early years or anything, just perhaps knew more about the musical and opera scene than most. They had teased him anytime he brought up his musical inability. They would say, “Hey, you were pirate number four, and I’m sure the best pirate number four that ever was. That meant you sang in the chorus of “Major General.” That can’t be easy.” Aaron had blushed at his and said, “Well, I mouthed most of the words, to be honest, and I almost dropped Haley twice during rehearsal and one performance night.” His admission had _y/n_ in stitches on the couch. It was a fond memory for them both. As more good memories flashed before _y/n_ as they drove, they were grateful for having such a kind and loving partner as Aaron.
When they arrived at the field, _y/n_ sat on the small stands watching the team practice. They kept a special eye on Jack. Aaron had inadvertently made his way to the field and was helping the other middle-aged dad correct and help lead the team. _y/n_ had suggested that he should make it a permanent thing. Talk to the other dad, but Hotch had said he wanted to wait. If Jack showed a serious interest, he would pitch the idea to Greg, the man who was the ‘official’ coach. Aaron didn’t want to pressure his son into a passion or sport unless he wanted to play. He wasn’t going to force Jack to do anything, unlike his father had done with him. Hotch was highly considering it. It would be fun and give his life some stability. It would also mean more built-in quality time with Jack, which in his book, was never going to be a bad thing. Ever. Aaron’s eyes caught movement nearby, and he saw _y/n_ move to a seat on the small bleachers paralleling either side of the field. He smiled at them, and _y/n_ beamed back, giving a small wave as a means of “Hello there, mister.” Hotch tore his eyes away from his love to look at Jack who made a goal. Aaron punched the air and said, “Let’s go, Buddy! That was amazing.” The practice finished; the trio moved to get pizza at a nearby spot. The food was greasy and filling, and _y/n_ asked Jack how he was doing at school and home. Aaron watched as they listened intently to what his son was saying. Like Jack’s commentary was the most important thing in the world to them. When all the slices were consumed, Aaron having helped Jack finish off the crusts of his son’s slice, they all piled into the cars. By this point, it was time for Jack to be taken back to Haley’s. Aaron coordinated with _y/n_ and they agreed to meet back at his place. He would drop off his son, and they would put their new plant at their place before heading back to his apartment. They would decide what they wanted to do with the rest of their afternoon from there.
An hour or so later, they reconvened at his. They sat on his couch as some random Bowie album played in the background. Aaron kissed the top of _y/n_’s head asking, “So what do you want to do before tonight?” That evening, they had agreed to meet up with Rossi, Derek, and Emily at some new spot for cocktails. That wasn’t until 8:30 p.m., so they still had a few hours to themselves. _y/n_ suggested a small walk around the neighborhood. They loved to look at the architecture of the older buildings in his area. The trees that lined the drives. Those trees were slowly changing color from bright greens to burnt oranges. It was a stark contrast to the brutalist concrete architecture of their own apartment. Block of cinder on blocks of cinder. It certainly wasn’t the main reason they wanted to move in with Aaron, but it was a small one. The aesthetics of his part of town had drawn them in. They knew they had romanticized the area, but how couldn’t they, given the inhabitant at the center of their world? The pair moved outside and onto the drive. Hotch pulled them close. He wrapped an arm around their waist, providing a small intimate touch, as they walked down the street. _y/n_ leaned their head against his side and said, “You’d never believe who I saw at the plant swap today.” Hotch thought about it as they continued to walk. He hedged a guess, saying, “Let’s see. How about Rossi?” There was a pause, and he amended his statement, saying, “No Morgan. It was Morag for sure!” _y/n_ laughed. The throaty sound warmed him from the inside. After a beat, they said, “It was Haley, actually.” This had Aaron stop for a second. He looked down at _y/n_ and he said, “Really?” _y/n_ nodded and said, “Yeah.” Hotch composed himself and he guided them forward again. A lot of thoughts ran through his mind. He finally asked, “Did she seem okay?” Aaron kept up with Haley as much as he thought was respectful. Of course, Jack brought her up often in conversation, and he listened with rapt attention, but other than that, he tried to give her space. It only felt right that he let her build her own life again. That was what she had wanted when she had left him, and he respected that. After a moment, _y/n_ replied, “She seems happy. She was waiting for some bigwig plant person. You never told me she was that good with plants. I’m sure she thought my offerings were a bit pathetic after seeing what she had.” Hotch squeezed their side. It didn’t pass him by that they hadn’t mentioned the gender of the “bigwig,” but he wasn’t going to ask for his ex’s privacy. It wasn’t any of his business anymore. He did, however, address _y/n_’s second comment, saying, “Well, Haley is particular, I’ll say that, but not in a bad way. I’m sure she wouldn’t judge you for trying something new. I bet she was happy to see you.” At this, _y/n_ flushed. It made them feel good to still hear Aaron support his ex-partner. If there had been a resentment between them, Aaron at least had let it go. And given how Haley had reacted that morning to seeing them, it seemed that Haley perhaps felt the same. It was refreshing to see people who had separated still be kind to each other. It meant that love that had faded didn’t mean that that love hadn’t existed. It had been real and that was okay to acknowledge and feel. Sometimes it felt like society and media pushed that love had to be this pulsating, living passionate thing. But often, love moved into hibernation, or it slowed and puttered out. Like a candle blown out by a shaky breath. The flame would fight for life for a moment before being snuffed out. That in a way, was a comfort. Not that _y/n_ saw that happening with them, but it ever did, it was nice to know that he would never slander or bad mouth them behind their back. That had happened to them before, and it wasn’t pleasant. Not at all. They continued to walk and enjoyed this small time together.
Next month _y/n_ returned to the plant swap. As adamant as Aaron had been about joining her next time, Hotch had been called away from a special lawyer consult. It was yet to be seen if the team would need to join him. Because of the possibility of a new case, _y/n_ was going to enjoy their Saturday while they could. _y/n_ moved back to the now-familiar coffee shop. When they entered, they spotted Willow, and someone they assumed was Willow’s girlfriend. _y/n_ moved closer to her new friends. Willow smiled and introduced their girlfriend to them. The trio chatted for a while. Willow asked, “Hey, I thought you said you were bringing your partner this month. Is everything okay with you two? _y/n_ smiled at their friend’s consideration and good memory. They had said that they were bringing Aaron this month. _y/n_ replied, “We’re all good. Thanks for asking. He got pulled out of town for a work thing. It’s tragic really. Next month for I’m bringing him for sure.” After this, _y/n_ and Willow found some other folks at the meet-up to swap their wares with. As _y/n_ finished her exchange with a young college student horticulturist, the door opened, and Haley entered the room with Jack attached to her hip. The young boy noticed _y/n_ and said her name and waved. _y/n_ waved back and Haley moved toward them. The blond-haired woman sat across from _y/n_ and said, “Hey _y/n_. Could you watch Jack while I get our drinks?’ _y/n_ smiled and nodded, saying, “Yeah of course.” Haley leaned down to be on eye level with her son and asked, “Do you still want hot chocolate?” Jack nodded enthusiastically. Haley softly said, “Okay. I’ll be right back. _y/n_ is going to look after you while I get us some drinks.” _y/n_ asked Jack how his week had been, and the child tiptoed over to her from his seat and climbed onto their lap. _y/n_ smiled down at him as he detailed his last week of school, the new cartoons he had watched, and how his mom let him have pizza, twice because he felt sick on Monday. As Haley returned, they hoped Jack's choice to sit on her lap didn’t make the older woman uncomfortable., but Haley had a small hint of warmth on her face as she made her way back to the table and set Jack’s hot chocolate in front of him. Haley said, “I ordered it at a kid's temp, so he’s good to drink it right now.” _y/n_ nodded, thankful for the clarification. In his quiet, pleading voice, Jack asked, “Is there whipped cream?” _y/n_ looked over to Haley again and she nodded yes. They smiled and with one hand opened the lid of the cup so Jack could get to the whipped cream before it melted into the chocolaty drink. As the young boy was focused solely on his drink, _y/n_ looked at Haley and asked, “So, Mrs. Hotchner, how was it with Richard? Did you get the plant you wanted?” Haley smiled and said, “_y/n_ there’s no need to be so polite. Please just call me Haley. Being called Aaron’s last name is awkward and I know you feel it too.” _y/n_ flushed but nodded, saying, “Alright, Haley.” In being able to use her first name without it being awkward. There was a soft relief in that.
Haley ended up answering their question saying that Richard had been lovely and that she had gotten the rare propagation she wanted. The woman didn’t go into further detail about the man, but she didn’t need to. _y/n_ could tell from her tone and facial features that there was an attraction between Haley and Richard. _y/n_ was happy for her. They hoped Haley could find someone that would complement her and her life goals. After a moment of silence, Haley asked something she had wondered for a while. She still missed Aaron some nights even though she knew it was for the best for both of them to not be together, but this one small innocuous element of her ex-husband and she asked, “Does Aaron still do that thing where he’s asleep but sleep talking like he’s having a real conversation?” _y/n_’s eyes went wide and they chuckled softly saying, “Yes. Oh my gosh, all the time. He totally thinks he’s having some deep philosophical conversation too. Like, he’s so serious about it.” Hearing this made Haley laugh too and she said, “And he’s just saying random words and phrases. If that. Sometimes it's just those little sounds.” Both adults laughed again, and _y/n_ felt warmed that they could talk like this. That they were forming their own bond. Now that they had opened this channel of conversation, _y/n_ said, “You’ll never believe what he did last week.” Haley easily said, “He killed one of your plants, didn’t he?” _y/n_ not expecting her to guess so quickly and correctly, started to say, “He…” They but themself off as _y/n_ realized that she had answered correctly. _y/n_ said, “Yes actually. How did you know?” Haley smiled and said, “Oh can I tell you about the plants he’s killed of mine? I swear you leave that man alone for a day heck, even a long afternoon, you need to expect a casualty of war. I used to drag him to the plant store and make him buy a replacement plant with his card. Not that our money was separated back then, but it made me feel better. You should have him do that for you too. He’ll pretend that he hates it, but secretly he enjoys it a lot.” There was a short silence after they both chuckled. Jack moved from _y/n_’s lap and back to his mom's. Haley grasped him gently and asked, “Where is he by the way? I guess I thought he might come with you this month.” _y/n_ smiled and said, “He meant to, but a half-case, half-lawyer thing came up in Wyoming. The team’s still waiting to see if we’re going to be called in.” Hearing this, Haley sighed and said, “The job never stops, does it.” _y/n_ nodded in agreement and then the blonde-haired woman said, “You should call him. Let me tell him off for killing your plant.” _y/n_ flushed and stuttered slightly. If Haley wasn’t being so open and friendly they might have thought that she was trying to get Aaron back, but they knew that wasn’t the case. Haley had well and truly moved on from Hotch. _y/n_ thought, ‘What the hell. Why not.” _y/n_ pulled her phone from their back pocket and pulled up speed dial. Aaron answered on the second ring. He didn’t sound tired exactly. Really he just sounded bored. He said, “Hey, honey, what’s up? Is everything okay?” _y/n_ flushed slightly and asked, “Are you busy right? Are you in a meeting? It’s nothing bad, I promise.” There was a pause and Hotch replied, “No, I just got out of one though. This is reminding me of why I left law all over again.” _y/n_ chuckled again and said, “Well I have something to distract you with. Someone wants to talk to you.” _y/n_ handed the phone to Haley.
Haley took the phone and said, “Hey, Aaron. When you get back from your thing I think you should take _y/n_ to the plant store and get her a replacement. Maybe even a nicer one than the one you managed to kill.” _y/n_ was holding back laughter at Haley’s mock angry tone. In the large corporate law office in Wyoming. Hearing Haley’s voice on the line teasing him was not what he had expected. His brain started trying to pull pieces together, Like where and how _y/n_ and Haley would be together. Why they would be together. His head was still full of legalese it took him a second longer than normal. Finally, he realized it was the weekend of the plant swap, and that _y/n_ had told him Haley had been there last time. He felt warmed from the inside that _y/n_ and Haley had started to bond. It made him feel good. He had rather forgotten that his ex-wife had chastised him. Finally, he came back to his brain and said, “Um…” He stopped himself from saying “Honey,” and continued, “...Haley. I’ll do that. I did apologize, and in my defense, I did everything _y/n_ told me to.” Haley laughed on the other end and was about to say something else but Jack could hear his dad’s voice and asked quietly on the other end, “Is that Daddy?” At hearing Jack, Aaron’s heart pushed in his chest. It felt like honey was being poured over an already sweet orange slice. Aaron had to clear his throat a bit and asked, “Is Jack there? Could you, could you put him on Facetime?” There was a soft shuffling sound and Hotch moved down the hall and moved into an empty meeting room in the law firm. The lights automatically flickered on when he entered the room. The green icon for Facetime flashed and he pressed the allow button. The phone was mostly centered on Jack’s face as Haley held the phone in front of him. Jack was sitting in Haley’s lap and Aaron beamed. He said, “Hey buddy, how are you?” Jack smiled and replied, “Hi Dad. I’m good. Mommy and _y/n_ are here. They got me hot chocolate.” Hotch feigned surprise, like this, was the biggest news in the world, saying, “Really! How was it?” Jack put up five fingers and said, “So good.” Aaron felt incredibly grateful that he hadn’t been in a meeting when _y/n_ had called. Seeing Jack was going to make this whole consult better. He looked at his watch for a second. He was going to need to head back to speak with yet another tax compliance team. Because of this, he said, “Hey, Jack can you have Mom give the phone back to _y/n_? It was so nice seeing you and I’ll call you near bedtime to say goodnight if I’m not busy, okay?” Jack smiled and softly said, “Okay” as Haley handed _y/n_’s phone back to them. _y/n_ gently got up and moved outside to speak with Aaron. They put in headphones in case he needed to say anything about his current job. They spoke for a minute or two and Aaron then said, “I love you so much _y/n_. I’ll keep you updated on the goings on here.” _y/n_ smiled and said, “Love you too, Aaron. Be safe and talk soon.” With that, they ended the call.
Three days later Aaron came back and the team was whole again. The team went on another case shortly after he got back. It was in Connecticut. It was a kidnapper taking the elderly and holding them for ransom. The unsub had been truly unspectacular. Not that anyone on the team ever wanted a hard case, but in contrast to some of the brain-boggling monsters the team found, the man was just a man. Disturbed and deranged. This kind of case left a different kind of taste in the team's mouths. It reminded them that normal people could be evil as well. It didn’t sit lightly on the shoulders. When the team got back home everyone tried to settle and accept what they had seen. _y/n_ and Aaron had taken a day apart, she needed to water and care for her plants after all. The next day they came over to his place, and they were spending a lazy day together. Aaron had gone on a run while _y/n_ biked beside him in the park and Aaron was taking a shower to rid him of his sweat. While he was washing off, his phone rang. _y/n_ looked at the caller ID and it was Haley. They didn’t answer for him in case it was something private. The call ended and shortly after their own phone rang. It was Haley again. As _y/n_ and Aaron had started dating, Haley had given them her number in case anything came up with Jack and Hotch didn’t answer his phone. After the second plant swap, _y/n_ and Haley had started texting on and off about plants or memes about plants. _y/n_ answered the phone, hoping nothing was wrong with Jack. As _y/n_ answered, they said, “Hey, Haley. What’s up?” The woman let out a breath and said, “I wanted to invite you and Aaron over tomorrow afternoon. My sister Jess is visiting and she hasn’t seen Aaron in a while, and I think you and her will get on well. Also, Jack wants you both here too. We were thinking of getting pizza delivered and watching a movie with Jack?” _y/n_ beamed and said, “That sounds so nice. We don’t have anything planned for tomorrow. I check with Aaron after he gets out of the shower. He or I will call you back once we know.” Haley nodded and said, “Sounds good. I hope you can make it.” A few minutes later Aaron padded out of the shower with a towel wrapped around his waist and his hair still ruggled and dripping. _y/n_ filled him in on the offer and he readily agreed. _y/n_ called Haley back and confirmed and she asked about any allergies that _y/n_ had and they filled her in on their dietary needs.
The next afternoon Aaron and _y/n_ made it over to Haley’s apartment. _y/n_ met Jess and they shook hands and started connecting immediately. Aaron gave Haley a hug and picked Jack up into his arms. As _y/n_ and Jess started talking about niche topics Aaron looked over to Haley as if saying, “What have you unleashed here?” And his ex-wife gave a little snort. The pizza arrived and Aaron paid for it. He found Haley alone as everyone grabbed a few slices and moved to the living room to pick a kid's movie to watch. As Aaron got a slice of cheese, he softly said, “Thanks for doing this.” Haley nodded and said, “I’m happy too. It felt right. _y/n_ is good for you.” Hotch blushed and didn’t give a direct reply; he just smiled as they both moved to the couch. Haley was at the far end of the couch, Jess and Jack were in the middle, and _y/n_ and Aaron were on the other end. As the opening credits and happy music of the movie started everyone quieted. Halfway through the film, the paper plates were piled on the coffee table. Jack was asleep, and _y/n_ had their hand on his shoulder. They rested their head on his broad shoulder. They weren’t really paying attention to the film, just enjoying being her like this. Aaron looked over those seated on the couch, he thought about what Haley had said about it feeling right. And in the moment it did. It did feel right. He closed his eyes, rested the top of his head on theirs, and just let things be.
______________________________________________________________
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"Major General" From the Pirates of Penzance (p.s.) The song gets kinda assault-y at the beginning, but the main song is impressive).
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#criminal minds#fanfiction#ssa aaron hotchner#cm#aaron hotcher#reader insert#aaron x reader#aaron hotchner x reader#aaron x gender neutral reader#gender neutral reader#hotch x y/n#soft hotch fic#domestic hotch#hotch blurb#jack hotchner#haley hotchner#comfort fic#hotch drabble#aaron is a theater nerd#pirates of penzance#plant aesthetic#Youtube
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practically perfect in every way hotch x reader
AN: alrighty y’all I have no fetching clue what I’m doing I just have many thoughts and need to get them out. This will likely have 2-3 parts depending on how long-winded im feeling. i whipped this thing out in one sitting and haven’t proof read it at ALL so please be patient with me lol.
Jack is 6 at the beginning of this bc I feel like it, and Haley is dead. rip. Hotch is around 40ish, reader is 25-26ish.
summary: Aaron Hotchner is looking for a nanny for his son. As luck would have it, the perfect candidate finds her way into their home through a perfect accident.
CW: None :)
Part 2:
Part 3:
Part 4:
Closing the book he just finished, Aaron Hotchner stood from the desk in his study to return it to the shelf. It was then that he heard a soft knock on the doorframe.
“Hey.” Y/n was leaning in the doorway, looking at him somewhat nervously. “Do you have a sec?”
“Of course,��� he replied “what can I do for you? Is everything alright?”
“Oh yeah I’m just fine,” she said “I just had a question for ya.” She took a step into the study, fiddling with her hands a bit, her nervous look still persisting. “So you know that I was planning on moving in with Braden in the next few weeks, right?”
He nodded.
“Well,” there was an awkward pause. It seemed she didn’t quite know how to phrase things. “That is no longer happening. To make a very long and very stupid story short, we broke up.”
His eyebrows shot up in surprise. He nearly dropped the book he hadn’t realized he was still holding. “Oh y/n I’m sorry to-”
“It’s fine,” she interrupted quickly. Hotch didn’t really believe her, but she continued before he had the chance to ask. “Anyway, I let the landlady know and she’s letting me out of the leasing agreement because she has a waiting list. The only problem is that my lease at my current place is up in a week and it’s too late for me to renew it. Soooo effective next Tuesday I’ll be homeless.”
He said nothing, just gave a tilt of his head as if to signal her to continue as he slid the book back into place on the shelf, crossing his arms over his chest as he listened.
“I wanted to ask -ugh this is so awkward, I’m so sorry- Could I maybe stay here? Just in the meantime? Once I’m on my feet and I have a place figured out I’ll be out of your hair I just don’t really know what else-”
“Absolutely.” He said with absolutely zero hesitation.
“Are you sure? I don’t want to intrude on you and Jack-”
“Y/n, you stay here when I’m out of town for work and you’re here everyday anyway,” He said, offering a soft smile, “I’m fairly certain this house would fall apart without you, so having you here all the time would honestly be great.”
She grinned. “Fall apart without me? If I didn’t know any better I’d say you’re getting attached to me, Hotchner.”
He returned her smile. “You know both Jack and I are quite attached to you, don’t get too cocky.”
She blushed. She was so pretty when she blushed. He should really tease her more if that was the result.
“Another option we could look at is that if you really wanted to, you don’t have to look for a new place,” he said somewhat quickly. He hoped he didn’t seem too eager. “If you wanted to be Jack’s live-in nanny you could live here in the house. I could up your pay too, to reflect the change in your job title, if that helps.”
Y/n’s face broke out into another wide smile. “I would love that. Are you sure that’s okay?”
“I’ll double check with Jack, but I’m sure he’ll be thrilled.”
“Ahhh thank you! You won’t regret it I promise” She gave a happy little squeal and tackled him in a hug, wrapping his arms around his neck and pressing a kiss to his cheek.
Hotch froze. It was now his turn to blush.
She slowly withdrew her arms, an embarrassed smile on her face. “Sorry about that. I guess I got a little carried away.” She murmured, looking down at her feet. “Thank you so much, Aaron. I really appreciate it.” She quickly left the study, refusing to meet his eyes.
He was left standing next to his bookshelf, blushing like an idiot. She had called him Aaron.
He had long been infatuated with his son’s nanny, but he didn’t realize that her simply saying his name could make him feel so blushy. He had it bad.
/ / / / /
18 months prior
Aaron, sitting at the desk in his study, looked over a recently submitted resume for a Ms. Williamson, who apparently had a degree in human development and family studies from an out of state community college. Her work experience was limited, but she seemed normal enough. He took a picture of her resume and texted it to Garcia.
AH: How about this one?
She replied almost immediately
PG: No go, boss. Looks like she never actually graduated and dropped out a few semesters in. She also has a handful of public indecency arrests and from what I can see is an active participant in a pyramid scheme. Who spends $40 on a bottle of shampoo?
He huffed out an exasperated sigh, tossing the paper onto a stack of other “no go” resumes. Aaron had been looking for a nanny for Jack for a very, very, very, long time. Longer than he cared to admit. Jess was always so kind to watch him, but he felt like he needed someone to help lighten the load, and he didn’t want Jess to feel like she always had to be available for his crazy work schedule.
Many applicants for the job were under-qualified (seemingly shocked that “babysitting” their roommate’s cat wasn’t adequate enough of an education) or unable to pass the incredibly thorough background check he had Garcia run on them. Who knew so many daycare workers had gambling issues?
Aaron’s paranoia about leaving Jack was already incredibly high due to his job, and he didn’t want that paranoia heightened due to leaving his son with someone he couldn’t trust to take care of him.
Exhausted with his failed search, he stood up from his desk and hollered for Jack. “Hey buddy, do you want to go to the park?”
Since this was the first time Aaron hadn’t been called on a weekend case in ages and he was definitely not going to waste it staring at resumes. He and six-year old Jack had brought a frisbee and a soccer ball, and he was determined to burn off as much of Jack’s never-ending energy and tire him out enough so he could go to bed early.
The park was popular for a reason, it catered to many different interests. There was a playground, a sand volleyball court, pickleball courts, a wide grassy field, and a long concrete track that looped around the park. In short, it was never empty.
About an hour into their time there, Aaron was sure that he was the one burning all his energy, and that Jack somehow acquired a bottomless supply.
Taking a break from kicking the ball back and forth, they had started a new game. Aaron, sitting on the ground, would throw the frisbee as far as possible, and Jack would run as fast as he could to get to it before it touched the ground. Aaron was sitting on the grass right behind one side of the cement track, and if he threw the frisbee hard enough he could manage to get it to the other side of the track, some thirty feet ahead of them.
It was a win-win situation. Aaron got to sit, Jack got to run around like a maniac, everyone was happy.
This was until after a particularly far throw Jack decided it was his turn to sit and that his Dad needed to run after the frisbee. Aaron conceded. After all, how far could Jack throw?
Aaron stood about ten feet in front of Jack, ready to run after the frisbee. He had explained to Jack how to throw it, but being only six he didn’t expect him to be a professional quite yet.
“Alright bud, you got it! Throw it really hard so daddy has to run for it!”
Smiling mischievously, Jack replied ‘I’m going to throw it with ALL my muscles.”
“Okay buddy,” Aaron laughed, “use ALL your muscles then.”
Jack gave what can only be described as a full-body wind up with indeed ALL of his muscles. However, instead of releasing the frisbee at the forward end of his throw towards his dad, he let go as his arm swung back, sending the frisbee careening behind him and right into the head of a jogger on the track, knocking her off balance and sending her tripping downward onto the concrete, scraping her knees and twisting until she landed on her back.
Oh no.
Oh no.
Aaron was already running towards the jogger as Jack flipped around and realized what had happened. He got to her side and knelt beside her as she sat up. “Oh my goodness I am sorry. Are you okay?”
She blinked a few times, eyes watering, then surveyed her scraped knees and hands.
“I… I’ve been better. But I’m okay. All good.”
Aaron was so worried about the injured (and distractingly pretty) stranger laying on the concrete that he barely noticed Jack standing behind him, observing the stranger’s injuries, tears forming in his eyes and beginning to cry. Sympathy tears were Jack’s specialty, and this poor woman was about to be a witness to them.
“I’m sorry,” He sniffed, “I didn’t mean to hit you.”
The jogger’s attention immediately snapped to Jack. “Oh hey bud, it’s alright,” She got up, wincing slightly, and knelt next to Jack, “I know you’re sad that I fell, but I know that it was an accident. It’s okay.”
Jack, still crying, threw his arms around the stranger’s neck. “Daddy said it’s wrong to hit people and I was just trying to use all my muscles so I could be strong. I didn’t know you were there.”
She smiled. God, she had a nice smile. Putting her arms around Jack she replied “I believe you dude, I believe you. And you definitely used ALL your muscles there. You must be pretty strong.”
Jack let go and withdrew his arms and nodded, still sniffing through tears. “Not as strong as dad. Or spiderman.”
“Spiderman is pretty strong,” she said, “and I’m sure your dad is too. What’s your name?”
“Jack.”
“Well Jack, it’s nice to meet you. My name’s y/n. Thanks for making sure I was okay, that’s very nice of you. Do you need another hug, or are you okay?” She asked with a soft smile.
Aaron watched this interaction with utter fascination. This complete stranger was likely concussed due to the actions of his son, yet she was asking him if he was okay?
He was still kneeling when the jogger, y/n, turned to him and stood. He rose to meet her.
“I’m so sorry, what was your name?”
“Aaron. Hotchner. Jack’s my son. Sorry again.”
“It’s okay, really, these things happen. Good thing you got me at the end of my run though because if this happened at the beginning I definitely would not have kept going” she said, laughing.
Aaron was suddenly filled with a large desire to keep the conversation going, no matter how awkward it became. He told himself it was because she seemed like a natural with Jack, and had nothing to do with her nice smile, pretty eyes, or cute laugh. It definitely had nothing to do with her long, toned, runners legs. At least that’s what he kept trying to think.
“I’m sorry we got you at all, but I’m glad our timing was good at least.”
“Impeccable timing, that’s for sure.”
“Do you live nearby? Can I get you patched up, or at least an ice pack for your head?”
“I'm decently close, I’m living a few miles south of here.”
“Can we give you a ride home? I think we’ve had enough excitement for today.”
She tilted her head and smiled, looking him up and down. He felt like she was deciding whether or not she could trust the father of the small child that nearly assassinated her via frisbee. An absolute stranger, really. Having made up her mind, she said “Sure, that would be great. My first aid kit definitely isn’t well stocked though, so can I take you up on an ice pack and a few bandaids?”
“It’s the least I can do.”
After finding the attempted murder weapon (aka the frisbee), the three of them got into Aaron’s car and made their way to the Hotchner household.
It was on this drive that Aaron learned that y/n was working as a nanny for a family in their neighborhood, but that her contract was nearly up and she wasn’t sure what her next step was. She had worked for them for the past year and had loved the little girl she watched. It was her day off apparently, which is why she was running in the park.
After careful questioning Aaron learned that she had degrees in communications and human development, and had done research on behavioral therapy and was a certified childcare provider both in Washington DC and in Virginia.
He couldn’t believe his luck.
Patching up scapes and verifying that she didn’t in fact have a concussion led to such good conversation (mostly about spiderman, soccer, and frisbee thanks to Jack) that she stayed for dinner, dessert, and until Jack went to bed.
After tucking him in, Aaron ducked into his study and sent another text to Garcia.
AH: I’m sorry it’s late, I have a new one for you. Her name is Y/N Y/L/N. Anything I should know?
A reply came immediately.
PG: Give me two minutes boss-man, If there’s dirt I’ll find it.
Aaron waited somewhat impatiently for two entire minutes before sending an additional text.
AH: Garcia???
He wasn’t expecting the incoming phone call from the tech analyst that lit up his phone. He picked up.
“Hey,” he whispered, “You’ll have to make this quick and be quiet if you can.”
“Can do, sir. Just wanted to let you know you’ve found the modern day Mary Poppins.”
“What?”
“She’s ‘practically perfect in every way.’ get with the program sir, I thought you’d know Disney references since you have a kid, but I guess you can’t be that rugged and be well versed in classic Disney cinema.”
“Garcia.”
“Anyway! This girl seems like a dream come true. Graduated with honors, well liked and respected by her peers and professors. She’s done clinical research on child psychology and looks like she frequents the local library possibly more than our own Dr. Reid. Oh! And she has a great driving record and zero criminal record to be found. And hey I’m sure you’ve seen her but she’s hot as hell too from her pictures and-”
“Thank you, that’s all I need. Have a good night!” He hung up the phone briskly, blushing from her last statement.
She was perfect. He mentally thanked whichever deity was responsible for guiding a frisbee into this woman’s head and into his and Jack’s life.
He came down the stairs to find y/n looking at the framed pictures on the mantle. There were some of Jack, the two of them together, and one of Haley.
He quickly (and not very smoothly) mentioned that he was looking for a nanny for Jack. She laughed at the perfect timing of their meeting.
“Well, it sure seems like you know who to call.” She said.
“Would you be interested? Really?”
“Half the battle in choosing a family to nanny for is finding both kids and parents I can get along with. Just meeting you two was enough to convince me that you’ll be great. Do you need to talk about it with your wife first?” She said, tilting her head towards Haley’s picture on the mantle.
Aaron looked away, not really sure how to broach the subject. “I’m not married. Not anymore anyway”
Y/n nodded. “I’m sorry if that was insensitive. I didn’t see a ring earlier, but I just wanted to double check because of the picture.”
“I appreciate you checking. That’s very considerate of you. But no, should be just fine. We can figure out salary and start dates another time if that’s okay? It’s getting late and I should probably get you home. Could I get your number before we go? I’ll be sure to give you a call when I’m free.”
“That sounds good to me! I’ll look forward to it” She gave him another warm smile and took a step forward, putting her hand out.“Only seems fair that we shake on it, right?”
Aaron couldn’t help but smile back as he clasped his hand in hers.
He had a very good feeling about this.
#aaron hotch hotchner#hotch x you#hotch#aaron hotchner#agent hotchner#jack hotchner#aaron hotchner x y/n#aaron hotchner fanfiction#Criminal Minds Fanfiction#hotch x y/n#hotch x fem!reader#hotch x reader#hotchner#haley hotchner#aaron hotchner fluff#aaron hotchner imagine#aaron hotchner smut#Penelope Garcia
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haley, 5.09: i want him to believe in love because it is the most important thing.
emily, 13.01: but jack? i love jack. i've watched him grow up. i will not betray him or his father, so it doesn't matter what you do to me. i will not break.
#criminal minds#aaron hotchner#emily prentiss#criminal minds evolution#hotchniss#haley hotchner#jack hotchner#hotch x emily
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Too Sweet.
Based on the following ask from @reidstheyfriend : Hotch x innocent/sunshine! Reader
I got this idea listening to Too Sweet by Hozier. I just immediately think of Hotch when listening to the song. I feel like Hotch would think he’s too broken or traumatized for reader because she’s so sweet and her heart is full of love and joy and that’s something he loves about her. He’s worried he would corrupt her and that she deserves better. So, most of the fic I would say it’s Hotch longing for reader but putting distance between them. Until he can no longer take it anymore. He needs her. He loves her.
I especially see the line where Hozier is talking about working late away from the phone and it makes her worry. I see reader calling/texting Hotch at late hours because she’s worried about him and he is too caught up in work to see her calls/texts.
Italics -text message
Hotch x innocent/sunshine! GN Reader
Angst/Fluff
Word count: 1206
REQUESTS ARE OPEN - not edited - please be kind. Requests are open and feedback is welcome if it's constructive!
Warnings: My blog is 18+, minors DNI, Aaron really doubting his worth, BAU canon typical violence, mention of Haley and Jack, reader has a sister, no use of y/n, no pronouns used for reader, pet names (honey, baby, sunshine) let me know if I missed any!!
That being said I do not own the characters portrayed in this story.
“Sunshine, you deserve so much more. I’m so sorry. I just, I want you to be with someone better, someone good.” Aaron said, his voice faltering.
“Aaron, wait. Let’s talk about this.”
Your heart broke at the sight of him. Aaron looked completely and utterly wrecked. You had a pretty good feeling that you knew his reasoning behind this conversation. Aaron had always called you his sunshine, he had said that you brought light into his life that had been long since dulled. You knew that Aaron had this fear of dulling your light, but you knew that wasn’t the case…you thought back to some of the things that had happened in the last few months that may have led Aaron here.
*Three Weeks Earlier*
Aaron had been working late, it had been a local case that was time sensitive. You knew this meant it was most likely a hostage situation or a child abduction, these cases didn’t offer a chance for the team to head home and sleep.
You had been keeping up with the case as much as the news and texts from Garcia would allow. You hadn’t heard from Aaron in a few hours, which wasn’t totally uncommon, however, Garcia had told you that the case had been solved and the team had been dismissed for the evening.
You figured he must be finishing up the reports and decided you send him a text before heading to bed for the night.
Hey baby, I know you’re working, I just wanted to text and let you know I am heading to bed. Jack wanted me to tell you he loved you when you got home, but I’m not sure when that’ll be. Honey, don’t work too hard…come home soon. I love you so much.
You hit send and set off to your room, after brushing your teeth, you slid into bed. After tossing and turning for a little bit, you hopped out of bed and moved to your dresser. You pulled out one of Aaron’s t-shirts and changed into it, adding a spray of his cologne. After taking a deep breath, your body immediately relaxed, and you climbed back into bed.
It was after three in the morning when Aaron came through the door. He made sure to be as quiet as possible as he moved through the apartment. He quickly checked in on Jack and then made his way to your room. His heart clenched as he saw you curled up in his shirt, clutching his pillow. He changed his clothes and brushed his teeth quickly before climbing into bed behind you, wrapping his arms around your middle. You shifted closer to him and he pressed a gentle kiss to your neck.
*Two Weeks Earlier*
Aaron had been home for about two hours and in that time, he’d greeted you, grabbed a whiskey and gone straight into his office. Things at the BAU had been extremely busy, this had been the first night Aaron had been home in three weeks. All you wanted was to have him by your side while you slept tonight.
“Aaron, honey, why don’t you come to bed? It’s nearly daylight.” You suggest.
“I, know sunshine, I’m sorry. I’m almost done!”
“Aaron…”
He looked up at you, finally noticing the exhaustion in your expression. He clicked his mouse a few more times, signed one last form, then got up. He made his way to you and wrapped his arm around you.
“Let’s get you to bed.” Aaron said as he placed a kiss to your temple.
Things had been like this more often than not, Aaron consistently working late, be it at home or the BAU. He’d be up until dawn, sipping his whiskey neat, going over paperwork. You’d fallen into this pattern where you’d be waking up in time to say goodnight to him. Knowing he’d have to get up pretty soon, you’d make his coffee, not that it took much, he drank it black. Aaron would get up, make his way to the kitchen, grab his coffee, and give you a kiss as thanks.
“Sunshine, you are as bright as the morning.” Aaron smiles.
“Honey...” You’d blush.
*Present Day*
“Sunshine, there’s nothing more to talk about. I’m not good for you. You have stayed up waiting for me, time and time again. You consistently have to go to bed without me, have dinner without me. I mean last month alone I missed three dates, two of Jack’s soccer games, and the Halloween party at your sister’s.” Aaron trailed on.
“Aaron, honey, it’s okay. It happens. The BAU is a busy job, you’re literally making the world a safer place.”
You could see the emotions flashing across Aaron’s face. The inner turmoil he was currently experiencing made you reach out to him, gently placing your hand on his cheek. He brought his hand up to cover your own, leaning into your touch.
“Sunshine I just want you to be happy. You should be with someone who has time to show you how wonderful you are, someone who doesn’t miss dates.”
“Aaron, don’t you get it? You have made me so incredibly happy in the time we have been together. I got into this relationship knowing full well that you would be extremely busy and that you might miss some things…but that doesn’t bother me. Honey you show me your love and appreciation every single day. You have my favorite flowers delivered once a week, that way I’ll always have fresh ones. You leave me sticky notes on the bathroom mirror with sweet notes, so I’ll have a good start to my day. You put my towel on the warmer so I can be extra cozy when I get out of the shower. You make me lunch each morning, so I don’t have to. This relationship is so much more than missed dates and waiting up honey. You are an honest, kind, loving man, Aaron you deserve to be loved.”
Tears were falling from both you and Aaron. You just wished that Aaron could see himself through your eyes. After things with Haley, he truly had never been the same, he feared that his love only brought destruction. It had taken months of dates and persuasion (from Dave) to get Aaron to ask you to be his. The longer Aaron had been with you, the more he thought that he didn’t deserve your love. You were the best person he knew; you could bring a smile to anyone’s face through your presence alone. He couldn’t let his darkness cloud your sunshine. And yet here you were, proving to him that he too had light, light that he had brought to you.
“I’m sorry sunshine. I just, I get in my head. You’re just so good.”
“Aaron it’s okay, as long as you don’t still plan on calling this quits.”
“I’m not going anywhere sunshine. I can’t promise I won’t doubt myself ever again, but I can promise that I am here for the long haul.” Aaron squeezed your hand gently.
“Well, that’s good because you are stuck with me.” You smiled.
“You’re too sweet for me.” Aaron said before leaning in and pressing a gentle kiss to your lips.
#aaron hotchner#aaron hotch hotchner#hotch#aaron hotchner fic#aaron hotchner x reader#ssa aaron hotchner#criminal minds#aaron x reader#hotch x reader#hotch x you#hotch x y/n#emily prentiss#penelope garcia#spencer reid#david rossi#derek morgan#jennifer jareau#criminal minds fandom#thomas gibson#jack hotchner#jessica brooks#haley brooks#haley hotchner#aaron hotch x you#aaron hotch x reader#aaron hotch imagine#aaron hotch fluff#aaron hotch fic#aaron hotch fanfiction#aaron hotchner x you
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all the wrong things on fire
Summary: An attempt at clubbing post break-up leaves Haley wanting somewhere safe to land and she winds up drunk and horny on Hotch's doorstep. He's confused, still battered pretty good after the bomb in NYC, and does a piss poor job of telling her no. (Post Lo-Fi/Mayhem)
-or-
A really awkward way that Haley finds out about Hotch & Morgan's relationship.
Words: 6.7k
Warnings: sexual harassment, dubious consent (touching/kissing, no sex), borderline infidelity, awkward sexual situation, alcohol & bad decisions, depression, grief...
Pairings: Hotch/Morgan (with a little Haley action thrown in)
Read on AO3: all the wrong things on fire
Notes: This is written for @tobias-hankel's Pre-Whumptober challenge. I got the prompts I wanted, but the use of them is about as dubious as the consent in this fic. It's supposed to be "sexual harassment" but it's...more than that. And different than that. I don't know what you'd call it. Borderline assault? Dubious consent? All or none of the above? And I was supposed to go with a boss as the person doing the damage, and I did write 4 other versions of this going that direction that I may very well turn into full-fledged stories someday but they were getting so complicated and I am not up for taking on another multi-chapter experience right now. I can barely be trusted with the ones I have. Anwyay. On with the show!
*****
He shouldn’t have opened the door. The moment he saw her standing there, looked at her through the peephole, he knew it was going to be trouble.
Haley didn’t just pop by his apartment. Not ever.
But he did open the door, because she looked pointedly up at the peephole like she knew he was right there. She looked at him (he knew it was silly paranoia, that wasn’t possible but he felt that shock of electricity that accompanies eye contact and he couldn’t shake it. Just a flick of the deadbolt and he was pulling the door open.
The smell of tequila on her breath startled him, she didn’t drink often and whens he did it certainly wasn’t tequila. That drink was saved for girls nights, or he supposed now nights on the town, prowling for a spot of fun. Her smile was wide and bright, made easier by the tequila sunrise. Sour and sweet, mixed with a perfume that reminds him of his senior year of high school. Hours spent deep in the woods, their backs up against a tree, hardly able to keep their hands to themselves. His hands on her thighs, roaming up under her cheerleader skirt, her tearing at his raggedy old sweater. Wild, insatiable teenage lust. She hasn’t worn this perfume in a long time, this soft vanilla and cherry blossom scent that made him crazy once upon a time and now just makes him feel hollow.
“Haley,” he said quietly, his fingers twitching at his side. His movements were stiff and slow, a far cry from his usual fluid grace. A bomb going off in your face, an explosion sending you flying through a downtown New York street will do that to a body. He leaned against the door frame automatically for support. She didn’t seem to register the movement, she was staring intently up at him with a look that he would describe as hungry. It made him feel uneasy.
“Hi Aaron,” she purred. He could barely hear it over the ringing in his ears but she smiled to punctuate the statement and his face remained carefully neutral. “May I come in?”
She lifted her arm and waved a bottle of wine in front of his face like it was the ticket to her entry, like he’d jump at the chance to get drunk with her. That prospect was far from his mind, though. All he could think about was whether or not she drove (probably not) and what she was doing there.
“Where is Jack?” he asked, his voice a little louder than necessary like it was going to help. She’s not the one who can’t hear, anyway. His body still blocked the door, blocked her entry. His ears were buzzing with all the rage of a mad hornet’s nest, it’s been a long painful week and he’s really not in the mood for her inquisitions. What he wanted to do with his night was lay on the couch in his silent apartment and wait for his date to arrive, wait for dinner and a movie. This surprise didn’t sit well.
“He’s with my sis-ter,” she enunciated it awkwardly and he felt a pang of guilt for making her stand out here so long so he decided to let her in. Her entry was a bumbling attempt at a glide in heels she was not used to wearing. Heels that she hadn’t worn since before Jack was born but Jess told her they made her legs look incredible so she gave it a shot. Jess was right, judging by the sheer number of men who bought her drinks at the club...the club that made her feel old and like a fraud. Everyone was so young, no one else was a middle aged divorced single mom...they were all hot twenty-somethings with mistakes still left to make. After a few tequilas, a cab ride to someone who had already made enough mistakes to make her comfortable seemed like a good decision. As she entered, she tried to play it cool. Like she’d been here a million times. Like she belonged here. Like this wasn’t the first time she’d dropped by his apartment for what amounted to a social visit since he moved in – occasionally she would step into the main hallway, meet him near the mailboxes to exchange Jack. Rarely had she ever stepped inside his domain. What she jokingly referred to as his bachelor pad, even though she knew him well enough to understand it was more of an artificial dwelling. Like someone in deep cover. He lived in his office.
Something about it was too sad even for her, that he should have gone from their beautiful colorful house to this...tiny apartment with its beige and brown and sad. Without asking for permission, she began poking around in his life. Sauntering through the place with the neck of the wine bottle firmly gripped in her hand, she searched the bookshelves for familiar boring titles – same old Aaron. She peeked into the laundry hamper sitting on the machine, opened and closed cabinets and drawers, inspecting the way he lived. His kitchen cabinets were empty save for a few boxes of Kraft mac n’ cheese and cereal, quick and easy food he kept on hand for having Jack over but nothing for himself.
“Where’s the oatmeal?” she asked, shutting the cupboard. “The Aaron Hotchner special.”
“I ate the last of it this morning,” he replied quickly. It was the truth. They’d been out on a case, his kitchen needed restocking but he hadn’t felt up to grocery shopping yet. He hadn’t felt up to much of anything the last couple of days. Not activity and certainly not sleep. He was a wreck. “Are you looking for something in particular?”
“Nope,” she said with a cheeky wink as she headed down the hall toward the bathroom to have a peek inside his medicine cabinet. At this point he knew it was some kind of a game and he was much too tired to play it. He couldn’t even pretend to care what she found. Instead he just stood with his back to the door, a stern look on his face, willing the latest dizzy spell to pass so he could walk to the kitchen. The vertigo was almost as bad as the pain.
Her trip back down the hallway was slower, almost seductive. She’d taken the opportunity in the bathroom to freshen up – let her hair down so it cascaded around her shoulders, she was letting it grow out. Her skirt was shorter, hiked up just enough to reveal the gentle curve of her thighs. He noticed these things not without interest and what this sudden change implied made him uneasy.
“What’s going on Haley?” he asked, finally steady enough on his legs to move toward the kitchen. He was going to make coffee, sober her up. Maybe ask if she wanted to talk, because that made more sense than anything else. She was seeking comfort from him in some misguided way. It was the only reason he could imagine for her to be in his apartment this late on a Friday night, reeking of tequila and perfume she knew would get him worked up. Would spark some memories both painful and sweet.
“I miss you. Can’t I miss you? Is that not allowed, Aaron?” She shot him a look that made his head spin. Dismissing it, he turned back to measuring the coffee. His shoulders moved painfully stiff and slow in their sockets, and another wave of dizziness overtook him while he poured the water into the machine. “Aaron?”
The far away sound of her voice made his chest feel tight. Sounds had an echo chamber quality that made him feel sick, surround sound for the lost at sea. The ground bucked beneath his feet and he gripped the counter in front of him, leaning forward, closing his eyes. Damn the vertigo.
The pain of her voice, of her telling him she missed him, somehow surpassed the deep ache of broken ribs and burst eardrums. That was the worst part. It got in deeper, twisted around inside of him. She was going to slice him wide open with that smile.
“Do you miss me?” She was picking at the cork, still nestled tight in the neck of the bottle, with one manicured fingernail. Knowing now that the bottle would likely remain unopened, she’d resorted to using it as a distraction. Something to take her nervous energy – some part of her was having regrets, but she’d made the decision and intended to stick with it. She was here, and horny, and dammit...Aaron probably hadn’t had sex in a year by her best guess, he’d be ready and willing. The thought of his hands on her hips gave her strength to carry on.
“Excuse me?” he asked in a raspy, quiet voice. He could barely hear her. She was being coy and he could assume plenty by her behavior but it was so at odds with how she’d been treating him since she left that he couldn’t make sense of it. And he couldn’t hear her when she dropped her voice into that range where she thinks she’s being some kind of Marilyn Monroe sexy but she’s just really being too damn quiet for his damaged ears to get hold of. The mixed feelings, the anxiety, was starting to make him frustrated.
“I said do you miss me?” She said it louder, enunciating it with a little air of annoyance. “Pay attention.”
Huffing indignantly, he turned around to face her. Of course he missed her. Every single day, every cell in his miserable body missed her. But he’s worked hard and made his peace with it, too, and he couldn’t indulge this without dealing that peace irreparable damage. He’s moved on, he’s seeing someone new, he’s patching his heart up. She gave him no choice. When he begged her to reconsider, to try counseling, she told him to move on. She already had. It was over, he wouldn’t ever change and she wasn’t going to sit around and waste her life waiting for something that would never happen. And so, he was forced to do the same – stop wasting his life waiting around for her to come back, to love him again.
But he was never meant to be armored against something like this. He never had been and suspected he never would be. She would always have the key to everything inside of him.
“I heard that you were...that your car blew up in New York? Ka-boom.” She made a funny hand motion on that last bit, a strange drunk way of easing tension. He didn’t think it was very funny though. He was still in far too much pain to find anything about that night, or the days after, amusing. .
“How did you hear about that?”
The coffee pot began sputtering to life, startling her. After bringing up the bomb, she began wandering again and found herself near a bookshelf where she lost a full minute staring at a photo of the two of them. His senior prom, tucked away in the corner of a shelf with yearbooks she’d insisted he keep. She didn’t want them, they made her feel old. He was the sentimental one. She stepped out of her heels and down into the carpet, walking closer to the photo to get a better look. He was so scrawny in his tuxedo, and her dress was enormous, took up half of the photo with tulle and lace. A sign of the times. When she lifted the picture and examined it, her gaudy makeup and fried hair, she felt her own heart thump a little too hard. That was regret, she recognized it. She shouldn’t be here doing what she was doing. It was cruel. But these sorts of things had their own momentum, and she couldn’t imagine a way for her to step backward and out of it. “When were we ever so young?” She whispered it to herself before clearing her throat and putting the photo back on the shelf. Done with that. He was the sentimental one, not her. He didn’t hear it, he was still watching her while he stood stiff in the kitchen, guarding the coffee pot. Turning around, she squared her shoulders and remembered his question. How did she hear about the explosion. She felt guilty now about bringing it up, about making light of it. His face was all torn up, covered in mottled purple bruises and bright red scabs. There was obvious swelling in his jaw and a wad of what looked to her like cotton stuck in one of his ears. He looked like he was hurt. Really hurt. She wished she could take back the ka-boom.
“I heard it from Jessica. She heard it from Sean who saw it on the news…”
Aaron hummed and nodded. Sean did send him the obligatory ‘what the fuck?’ text after it happened but by the time he saw it, he was already halfway home and not about to ask Derek to turn them around just to go say hello to his worried little brother. And besides, Sean probably didn’t actually want him to stop by, he just wanted to have the upper hand. The last person to reach out always had the upper hand, fleeting though it were. And furthermore, when he didn’t hear from Aaron right away he called Derek and got the whole story – a good thing, too, because a week later Aaron could still barely hear out of one ear and he wasn’t much in the mood for telling stories. It did hurt though that Jessica knew and didn’t call him. That stung.
“I wasn’t in the car,” he pointed out, as if it really made any difference.
“Well, I can see that...but you still look like shit. And Jess said that Kate died. I always liked her.”
“No you didn’t.”
Haley smiled and it looked to him like the smile of a wolf. A hungry wolf, and she’s hunting for something he was probably weak enough to give her if she kept at it. He wouldn’t fool himself. Between the pain he was in and his grief over Kate and the way that he and Derek have been trying to patch up the cracks in their own foundation, he’s an easy target and she knows all of the places where his armor wears thin.
“Are you hurt?”
“I’m alright.”
She gave him a look that said she knew better, that she doubted his truthfulness, and he offered her a defeated little shrug in response.
“I’ll be okay,” he corrected. “Just sore.” She would allow the lies to a certain degree, she always had let him have his dignity with little fuss, hoping that he would be honest when it really mattered. She didn’t care much anyway, it wasn’t her problem to deal with anymore. He was upright, he was walking and talking, and he didn’t have Jack. There was nothing to worry about so far as she was concerned.
She touched the bottle of wine on the counter as she passed, a sort of wilting caress knowing that he didn’t plan to open it. She was welcome to, she could find the corkscrew and he wouldn’t stop her but she had already realized she didn’t need it. No, it might make things worse. Sloppy. She didn’t want sloppy.
Before he knew what was happening, she was sliding up behind him, her hands gliding up the knotted muscles of his back and up over the mound of his shoulders where she began kneading. He winced, it didn’t feel good in the slightest as she pressed and pulled at deep bruises and swollen joints, tearing at barely healed road rash she had no idea was there. He wanted to tell her to stop but it’s been almost a year since she last touched him and it felt electric, he was powerless. He couldn’t bring himself to ask her to stop. It was all wrong and it was going to end badly but he let her knead at his neck, her thumb pressing into a particularly painful place behind his ear that makes him bite into the meat of his cheek just to keep quiet. The pressure lit up his head, igniting a pain in his head that felt like fire.
“You’re so tense.”
“Haley what are you doing?”
She pouted and stepped back, looking offended. The relief he felt when her hands were off of him was instant and powerful. “You don’t like it?”
“I don’t understand what’s going on.”
Except he did. He’s had just as many mouths whispering in his ear about her as she did him. Word spreads fast when small town heroes make waves, even in big cities far from home. They couldn’t escape each other. Everyone was talking about how she’d broken up with her...whatever he was. The phone call, he’ll never forget the way his veins ran cold when her phone rang in her purse as she gritted out the final ultimatum. Her little piece of side action that couldn’t hack it when he became the main attraction, Aaron guessed. And now what? Was she having second thoughts or just lonely and bored? He knew very well what this was, well aware of how these sorts of things played out...he would be a distraction from her sadness and he could easily make her just as much a distraction from his grief over Kate or the fear he feels that his hearing might never return to normal.
“I miss you,” she said again, this time approaching him, stopping with just barely a breath between them. The room around him spun as he breathed in the scent of her perfume and something else now, something heated and musky. “I thought maybe we could...you know...for old time’s sake?”
The coffee pot spit out the last of its nectar into the waiting pot and he bit into his lip. He doesn’t have to hear every word she says to know what she means by it. “How about some coffee? We can talk. You’re not…”
There was no warning, so soft kisses or tentative foreplay before she decided to charge ahead with her plan.
Her hand slipped easily into the front of his track pants, fingers wiggling their way down into the space between boxers and skin. He felt the warmth spread, it was involuntary and subtle at first but even this felt normal. At the coffee pot in the mornings, she might slip up behind him and give him little choice where their morning was headed...except he was a willing participant in those memories and this time it was different. Everything about this was wrong, dirty, made him flush with shame. He didn’t want to hurt her feelings, to make her feel bad or stupid but god he just wanted her to stop touching him. Against every bit of willpower he thought he had, every last shred of dignity he tried to muster, he could feel himself getting hard in her hand. He grunted and shifted and pulled away. It was weak at best but it stopped her briefly. She still had her hand wrapped around his dick but she wasn’t moving, she was just looking up at him with those huge pleading bedroom eyes and he couldn’t remember a time in his life he’d ever told her no. “Haley please.”
He could beg too. Just not for the same thing.
“You don’t want me anymore?” She was pouting. “If you’re worried about feelings...don’t be. This doesn’t have to mean anything...just one night...to kill the loneliness. People do it all the time…” she was purring against his pulse, her lips tickling warm skin. He shivered. “Two people who know each other so well...”
“People might, but we don’t. You’re better than this. We can’t do this.”
She let out a barking laugh and rocked her hips against his before reaching up, hooking his neck, and pulling him down into a bruising kiss. It hurt his neck, made his ear pop painfully and he whined until he was locked in. When their lips met he felt himself giving in. Kissing her back.
“I don’t want to be better than this. I want you. Now.” That made him stop, it made him pull away – he could feel the lie in it like a dagger through his heart. A sugar coated lie hurt worse than sharp truth. That brief feeling of lust he felt for her was replaced with the burn of tears in his eyes.
“What about Jack?” he pleaded, desperate and breathless, overcome with a self-loathing that nearly devoured him whole. He should have brought up Derek, it would have stopped her, but he had so desperately been protecting that. Coveting it, keeping it private. Bringing it up now would cheapen it.
“He won’t know. One night isn’t going to matter…” she wrapped her fist in the collar of his shirt, holding his lips beside hers. “I know you want it too.” She stroked him and smiled as his body curved toward hers involuntarily, his eyes wild and desperately seeking an argument or some willpower but his body had already become hers to do what she wanted with. She’d won. “We can be quick...”
The lock clicked and the door knob turned, a strangely ominous sound that shattered whatever trance she’d let herself fall into. Who would be walking into his apartment? Who had a key to the place? She remembered him locking the door behind him. Slowly, confused, she turned to look and Aaron frowned following her attention as it focused on the door. He hadn’t heard the door. The realization of what was happening came in slow motion and he felt a burning in his chest. He was going to be sick. Coughing and turning his head to the other side as the taste of bile rose in his throat, he was powerless to the pull of his body. Mortified, filled with shame, the vertigo was coming back full force. There was no way he could look at the door, and he couldn’t look at Haley either. He couldn’t look anywhere so he closed his eyes, disgusted with himself.
“Haley,” he whispered, his palms against her shoulders trying to leverage her away from him without losing his cool. He was almost crying at the painful burning in his chest, the way his stomach twisted angrily. He needed to get away, get to the sink and quick.
“Aaron?” came a voice from the doorway. Haley unhooked herself and stared, mouth agape, at Derek Morgan standing in the doorway with a plastic bag filled with takeout and a bouquet of flowers held under his arm like a football. Aaron took her moment of distraction to stumble away from her toward the sink, hands gripping the edge until his knuckles went white, until he was dry heaving into the dirty dishes. Derek watched, confused. “What’s going on?”
Aaron could barely hear him, but he knew what the question would be anyway. He would ask it too, if he’d walked in right then. There was only one thing he could possibly have questions about. “I don’t know,” Aaron gasped around wet, ragged breaths because it was the most honest answer he could muster. He turned away from the sink, pressing one palm flat against his sternum, all the color drained from his features. There was one precarious moment when bright white began creeping in at the edge of his vision and he thought of fucking course, I’m about to pass out. But he didn’t, he remained with them and steeled himself as he looked at Derek. He had to see Derek, he had to look at him. Hiding was only going to make it worse. There was hurt on Derek’s face like he’d never known, hurt that was magnified by the still fresh wounds of New York...but Derek didn’t turn to leave and that had to be something. More than Aaron figured he deserved. “I don’t know.” He repeated himself like it helped anything.
“Derek,” Haley said, finally finding her voice. Clearly Aaron wasn’t going to say a damn thing, he wasn’t going to get them out of this or make it seem okay. Maybe that was fine. She didn’t think she had anything she needed to explain, she had every right to be here in his apartment. She was invited in after all. They were grown adults. “What are you…?”
It dawned on her suddenly, when she took stock of the flowers and the food and the way he was dressed so casually. Not work casual, real casual. Track pants and a t-shirt, shoes he kicked off in the doorway...like this place belonged to him too. Like he wasn’t coming over he was coming home. There was a toothbrush in a cup beside the kitchen sink, and the laundry basket beside the washer had a lot of clothes in it she knew Aaron would never pick out. In fact, what he was wearing now suddenly struck her as odd – a worn brown t shirt and soft navy sweatpants that hung a little too low on his hips, sweatpants that were emblazoned with a Northwestern University logo that was cracked and worn. She’d seen it all when she walked through his place snooping out loud, but she hadn’t really given it much weight. Now it all made sense and she felt like Aaron had the right idea. Maybe he’d move over and let her be sick at the sink too. “I’m sorry. I’m so sorry.”
But how could she have known? He didn’t say anything, dammit. He never said anything. He knew all about her post-divorce love life and she didn’t know a damn thing about his.
Derek set the food and flowers down on the kitchen counter, still staring at the two of them. “About what?” he asked, unwilling to do the work for them. He’d be damned if he was going to fill in the fucking blanks, they were going to say it out loud to his face. This was always a fear, something that tickled in the back of his mind, the possibility that this wasn’t over...wouldn’t ever be over. He lived with the possibility, but fuck. Why did it have to come so hot on the tail of Kate Joyner? The universe was really fucking pushing his buttons.
The counter was digging into the small of Aaron’s back but he didn’t trust his legs to try and move so he stayed put. Haley was there, right next to Derek, standing like she was frozen in place.
“I didn’t know,” she said quietly, wiping at her mouth with the back of her hand. The hand that had been in her ex-husband’s pants a minute before, she realizes that part a moment too late and feels the bile in her throat again. “I’m sorry.”
Without another word, because at this point what can she possibly say that won’t just make this worse? She grabbed her purse and rushed out the door. Her shoes were in her hands and she’d worry about that outside when she called a cab to take her away from here, away from this moment of shameful loss of control. She’d already started doubting herself before Derek showed up, as the tequila wore off and the reality began to set in. What a fucking tragic mistake. “I’m never drinking again,” she whispered to herself as she stormed down the hallway.
Derek didn’t bother to watch her leave. He didn’t care. He just stared at Aaron for a long, silent minute. Sixty seconds that felt like a lifetime.
“You gonna tell me what’s going on or do I have to guess? Because my guess is gonna make you look like a real fucking asshole.”
Aaron didn’t want to throw Haley to the wolves, some part of him felt an urge to protect her. She was suffering, she was just looking for connection. Misguided and predatory as it were, he couldn’t fault her for it. Not really.
“She just showed up a couple of minutes ago. Said she missed me…” There were big tears in his eyes now, and Derek could see that he was in real pain. He didn’t even seem upset that Derek walked in on them, that didn’t seem to register as the problem. Derek knew that he hadn’t walked in on anything that he needed to worry about, that much was clear in the way Aaron didn’t try to shy away from him. He wasn’t hiding anything, he was just ashamed at his weakness.
Without a word, Derek poured a mug of coffee and left the apartment knowing Haley can’t have gotten far. He figured he needed to give Aaron a minute to himself, to collect his thoughts, and Derek needed to talk to Haley a lot more than he needed to badger Aaron right then. She was the one who owed him an explanation. He found her sitting on a bench across the street waiting for her cab, slipping her feet wearily back into her ghastly heels. Glancing at the lack of traffic, he jogged across as quickly as he could without spilling the coffee and handed her the mug as he sat down beside her. Preparing himself to have a very awkward conversation with his boyfriend’s ex-wife when all he wanted was a quiet night with calzones and a stupid movie. A reprieve from the insanity, not doubling down on it.
“I’m glad you walked in when you did,” she whispered, her voice ragged and thick with emotion. She swiped at the black mascara tears that streaked down her cheeks. “I don’t know what I was thinking but I’m glad you stopped me before I made a really big mistake.”
“You’re lonely and he’s safe, that’s what you were thinking.” He said it like it was obvious, and it dawned on her that he was right. That was exactly it. The men at the club hitting on her had made her feel old and worn, but more than that they made her feel frightened and vulnerable. Aaron never made her feel that way, and the tequila made her horny and stupid.
She smiled sadly and sipped the hot coffee. “I’m such an idiot.”
He didn’t argue with her, it wasn’t his job to make her feel less like a fool for what she’d decided to do. He was certainly not going to make her feel better about it. What she did was stupid and was cruel, but he could see that she was hurting and what he said was true – Aaron is safe and she clearly needed safe. It was cruel in a sense, deciding that in her loneliness she could play it safe and use him for her immediate needs...Derek wasn’t about to make her feel better about that, but he was going to extend an olive branch. He had to. For Aaron, maybe, or for Jack. For the fucked up little family that he was still trying to be part of.
“I’m willing to forget about this,” he said finally. “As long as it never happens again.”
“Do you love him?” she asked, ignoring his statement. He sighed and considered not answering her at first, but it wouldn’t do any good. Maybe she needed to hear it, to sever whatever tie she had to this back up plan in her mind. Aaron can’t be her safety net, not like this.
“Yeah. I do. Sometimes I really hate him, too, but yeah. I love him and I’d really like this to work out.”
“He’s always had a thing for you,” she said, finishing the coffee. “Did you know that?”
It’s her own attempt at an olive branch, maybe. He didn’t want it but he did take it. “Yeah. It was mutual.”
She smiled as the cab pulled up in front of them, brakes squealing and tires grinding in gravel. There wasn’t anything else for her to say – she wasn’t going to congratulate Derek on landing her ex. She didn’t feel happy about any of it. But she didn’t destroy their relationship with her sad night of desperation and that had to count for at least one pathetic little smile. “Nothing happened,” she said finally. “I mean, I tried to make it happen but...he did try to push me away. He did try to get me to stop.”
Derek nodded, but he had nothing to say to it. It wasn’t like he couldn’t have played the whole thing out in his head, he knew Aaron well enough to write the script verbatim...but that didn’t stop the hurt. It didn’t make him feel better.
“Would you tell Aaron I’m sorry? I don’t think I should talk to him for a while.”
“Yeah. I’ll tell him.”
Derek sat on the bench for a while as the cab drove away, watching the lights fade into the distance. He turned the still warm mug around in his hands and stilled the thunder of his own angry heart. He had a choice to make – he could just get on his bike and leave. Aaron would expect it, he might even already think it had happened. He could shoot him a text saying that he needed some time – wasn’t that what people did? How this sort of thing played out?
But they’d been through hell already and this wasn’t a storm they could deal with better on their own than together, and that thought alone made him stand and walk toward the apartment instead of away. The door was open, waiting for him, and he walked through it just as sure as he did the first time, this time clicking the lock behind him. The lights inside had been dimmed and Aaron was sitting slumped over on the couch, his head cradled in his hands. The place was silent except for the sound of his crying and the gentle steamy hiss of the coffee pot keeping things warm. Haley’s scent had been replaced by coffee and calzones.
“I’m sorry,” Aaron whispered in a voice so soaked with tears that Derek could hardly hear it. He sat down beside Aaron on the couch and folded his hands in his lap. There were only a few inches between them but it felt like a canyon.
“I know. She said she is too, by the way.” He paused, licking his lips, searching for the most diplomatic voice he could muster. One of them had to stay emotionally neutral or things were going to get ugly. Really fucking ugly, and they’ve had too much of that lately. Usually he was up for it...not now. Not like this. “Aaron…” He didn’t know how to ask what he needed to ask. How to make this not seem like breaking up. He knew what Haley said, and he believed it...but he needed to hear it from Aaron. “If I hadn’t shown up, would you have stopped her?”
Aaron stared miserably at the floor, barely breathing. Not blinking. He watched a thick tear plop against the carpet and pool there beside his foot. “I tried.”
“You’re twice her size. You could have walked away pretty damn easily. Would you have?”
Aaron’s shoulders began shuddering and he buried his face in his hands again, fingertips digging into his eyes. He’d already been crying but this was different, it was a panic cry, shame and guilt tearing him up from the inside. Derek squeezed his hands together to keep himself from closing that gap and taking Aaron into his arms. Not yet. Everything in the entire world hinged on Aaron’s answer.
“Would you have stopped her?” he asked again, quieter this time. More serious. Even through the pounding in his head and the screaming in his ears, Aaron heard it loud and clear.
“I don’t know.”
Derek nodded solemnly and stood, walking over to the counter where he’d set his belongings. Slowly, methodically, he pulled out cardboard boxes and began popping the lids open to see whose food was inside. He busied himself with gathering plates and utensils, lovingly putting the flowers in water and arranging them. His favorite vase was on the top shelf and he had reached for it automatically, wondering if Haley would have asked him about love if she knew he brought over flowers often enough to have a favorite vase. It didn’t matter, the thought only served to make him angry when he was working in the opposite direction. He was satisfied with Aaron’s answer – not because he liked it, he hated it. The way it made his stomach grind and ache, made his blood turn to lava flow. He wanted to put a hole in the wall and cry out for mercy, he wanted to shake Aaron and ask if he wasn’t enough, but he wouldn’t. He was satisfied with the answer he hated because it was honest and he can work through anything in the whole miserable fucking world world...except a lie.
They could work through this. Not tonight, there was nothing to be gained by discussing it now. Tomorrow, maybe, when heads were clear and hearts were guarded, when tongues weren't so keen on spitting fire. Tonight was date night, dammit, and he was going to protect the sanctity of that with his last shred of sanity.
“What movie are we watching tonight?”
The question startled Aaron. He dragged his hands slowly down his sticky cheeks and glanced up, half half-expecting to have seen Derek grabbing his food and heading for the door. Instead, he was approaching with steaming calzones on plates and the flowers he brought were on display on the dining room table. A beautiful spray of deep garnet colored tulips. Derek liked to bring him red flowers, bright crimson or deep garnet, he said it made the apartment look less like a cave.
“I’m not sure,” Aaron rasped, unable to contain the surprise in his voice. He rubbed at the stubborn tears clinging to his lashes and accepted his plate from Derek with both hands – he could smell the mushrooms and jalapenos and olives inside. His mouth watered. Derek groaned at his response to the question, as if it were the biggest inconvenience of the entire night.
“Aw come on. You had one job, man.”
Aaron smiled a little shy and that was when Derek realized he was bluffing. Letting out an irritated little huff, he sat down and rested his plate atop his knees.
“I asked Penelope for recommendations. She gave me two. Attack of the Killer Tomatoes and Killer Klowns From Outer Space.”
They both sounded equally terrible to Derek, about the last things in the entire world he’d ever choose to watch if it were up to him but he was secretly glad that neither of them sounded emotional or heavy, not romantic or dramatic. Nothing to make him feel anything. Just a goofy good time with a few jump scares thrown in for good measure. They felt safe. They felt like the type of movies that would make Aaron curl into his side and fall asleep, the kind of movies he could lose himself in, the kind of movies he could turn his whole brain off for. They sounded awful but perfect.
“They both sound like big steaming piles of dogshit.”
Aaron nodded in staunch agreement. He’d already harassed Penelope about them, but she assured him they were perfect. “They do. But unless you brought any movies over, these are your options.”
“Don’t look so smug,” Derek spit with a smile, wavering back and forth between bad and worse. Killer tomatoes or killer aliens that looked like clowns. It was bound to be a shit show no matter how he broke it down. “Well,” he said finally, glancing at his calzone oozing hot tomato sauce all over his plate with unease. He knew the movie was going to be lame, wasn’t going to scare him in the least, but the night already had its fair share of discomfort and all he wanted was some distraction. Their dinner made the choice for him. “Bring on the clowns.”
#aaron hotchner#haley hotchner#derek morgan#hotchgan#criminal minds#fanfiction#hotch x morgan#mind the warnings!
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100 (y/n hotchner)
Warnings: Panic attack, death, vomit, all the stuff that happens in the episode happens here basically
Word Count: 4.7k
You’re gathered around the table with the rest of the team, choosing to sit down so that you could anxiously bounce your leg while listening. Apparently, there was a possible lead to Foyet. Aaron hadn’t told you what it was, which wasn’t unusual, he didn’t like to repeat himself often. On the way to Garcia’s Batcave, Aaron had asking everyone to gather in the briefing room.
You listen during the geographic profile, choosing not to say anything. Geographical profiling wasn’t exactly your strong suit - and you weren’t going to attempt it now, not with your family’s life on the line. You’d have to get better at it some other time.
Your head snaps to the door a moment later, Garcia running in. “Hey, me and the boy found a thyroid medication that has no substitute over the counter, you have to get it from the pharmacist. But a lot of people are on it,”
“Find the midpoint between the two cities and isolate within a twenty five mile radius” Rossi replied.
“153 names.”
“He’s not going to use his own name, what kind of aliases should we be looking for,” Derek said.
“He could have easily stolen someone’s identity,”
“No, he’s a narcissist in love with his own mythology,” Your brother said, “He’d use a name connected to the case,”
“A victim, maybe a cop,” Rossi suggested.
Nothing,” Penelope said, shaking her head.
“Wait a minute, guys, Foyet likes things to have meaning to him,” You watch as Reid and Aaron bounce off each other, Spencer coming to the conclusion of ‘Peter Rhea’.
“There’s a Peter Rhea in Arlington,”
After identifying Foyet, Garcia had an address in seconds and you all split up, making your way to the address. You made yourselves comfortable in the parking lot outside the apartment, waiting on Derek’s orders. Eventually, Morgan gave the all-clear for Swat to go further and you were all watching the check. You felt your eyes widen when you spot the clump of letters on the floor.
“That’s his mail,” Rossi said, Aaron gave a ‘yep’ before running off, gun in hand. You sighed, gripping your own gun before running after him. Honestly, your brother just ran into danger sometimes without even thinking about the possible dangers. Typical. You made sure to keep close to him as you could whilst running. You weren’t about to let him get shot or anything, not on your watch.
“If he’s in a hurry he’ll make a mistake,”
“Yeah, but when Foyet gets cornered, he starts killing people,” Aaron said.
“We’re not going to let that happen,” You promised firmly, holding eye contact with Aaron until he looked away. You weren’t going to let anything happen to your family.
“We need to get Garcia on this,” Emily said, bending down to take a closer look at the computer. You furrow your eyebrows.
“I think he’s erasing the hard drive as we speak,” You said.
You watch in awe (as always) as Garcia starts to repair the system Foyet was trying to erase. It doesn’t take long before surveillance photos of a man start appearing, almost like a slideshow.
“Oh my god, isn’t that-”
“That’s the US Marshall assigned to my family,” Aaron rushed, immediately fishing out his phone.
“Foyet’s been watching him this whole time?” You ask, Aaron doesn’t answer, instead, he dialled a number on his phone. He doesn’t answer, so Aaron leaves a message and hangs up, mind racing.
“We need to deploy another swat unit,” Derek said.
“That’s gonna take another half hour,” By the time JJ had finished speaking, Aaron was already on his way out of the apartment.
Your eyes widened as you ran after your brother, “Aaron! Aaron!”
You note that Rossi is right behind you, but you don’t slow down. You needed to try to talk some reason into your brother. When you finally caught up with him, he was out of breath and in a panic. Placing a firm hand on his shoulder, you make direct eye contact with him. “Aaron, Aaron, you need to take a deep breath and try to stay calm,”
“Calm? He’s- He’s going to find out where Haley and Jack are-”
You squeeze his shoulder for a moment and Aaron’s eyes flick back up to you, “We’ll stop him,” You said, your voice leaving no room for argument, “We always catch the bad guys, okay? Always.”
Aaron’s calm(er) when Rossi joins the pair of you and the three of you jump into the car. Despite the dread flowing through your veins, you couldn’t help but noticed how much like a father Rossi had become to the pair of you - you almost felt like he was driving you home after picking you both up from school.
When you reach Kassmeyer’s house, the first thing you notice is the droplets of blood by the front door. Aaron enters first, then Rossi, then finally you. Aaron heads straight over to the couch, where Kassmeyer’s laying in front, a pool of blood staining the carpet around him, you quickly clear the rest of the house while Rossi calls for an ambulance.
“It’s all clear,” You say, Rossi nods saying the same, before you both turn to Aaron.
“I tried, I’m sorry,”
“What are you sorry for?”
“I tried,” Your head snaps up as Derek and Emily enter, guns lowered. Spencer and JJ enter next, but you pay them no attention, fixating on your brother’s conversation.
“Are Jack and Haley safe?” Aaron asked, panic seeping through his voice. “Sam, tell me what happened,”
“I don’t know how he got in,”
“Sam, I need to understand, does he know where Jack and Haley are?” Your hand goes to your mouth as you begin to bite on the nail of your thumb, ignoring it as it tremored. “What about her phone number? What’s her safe phone number?”
“It won’t matter,” Kassmeyer muttered, “I tried Hotch,”
The paramedics rush in and Reid spouts off the injuries. You can’t hear them over the light ringing in your ears.
“Hotch,” Sam mumbled.
“It’s alright, I’m right here,” Was your brother’s instant reply.
You watch as your brother climbed into the ambulance with the Marshall. There was only enough room for one person. So you watch, standing next to Rossi, panic flowing through your veins as you wait for your next instructions. You had no clue what to do. What were you supposed to do? Aaron always knows what to do.
Relief floods through you when Aaron phones Morgan. Your still at Kassmeyer’s house, helping process the place.
“Foyet called haley from Kassmeyer’s phone.” Aaron said, voice echoing over the speaker.
“Alright we’ll get garcia to trace it, JJ.” Morgan soothed, nodding to JJ, who quickly left the room to make the phonecall to Garcia.
“He told her that she was compromised and that I was dead,”
“Have you called her?” You asked.
“No he said to throw away her phone and to buy a disposable,”
“Hotch we’re gonna come get you right now,”
“No Anderson’s bringing me a car.”
“You want to meet back at the office?”
“I’m hoping that she’s just going to call me at least to check,”
You swallowed, “Aaron, Foyet posed as a marshall, even called from a number haley recognised,”
“And then he did what gets him off, he scared her,” Rossi added.
“No he paralysed her, he overwhelmed her,” Emily chimed.
“And now she trusts him, where do you think he would take her?” Reid asked.
“Witness protection had her living in New Jersey,”
“He has a headstart, he could be there now,” You listen, silent, as Reid and Emily theorise.
JJ walked back into the room, phone in hand, “Garcia’s got a trace,”
“He’s bouncing around a few towers,”
“Where?” Aaron’s answer is immediate, nearly cutting Garcia off.
“Fairfax county,”
“He’s still local?”
“Send the coordinates to my phone,”
“Done,”
“Why isn’t he on his way to New Jersey?” JJ asked.
“Wait that phone’s on?”
“Yes,”
“Hotch?”
“He hung up,”
The dread in your stomach doubles and you subtly take a step back from the group, just needing some air. Somehow, it didn’t feel like there was enough air. It felt suffocating. Suffocating. Danger. Death. Haley and Jack. You curse your mind for playing ping pong with the worst-case scenarios, but you can’t help it. Jack and Haley were on the way to the man who had killed thirty-six people and stabbed your brother nine times. And here you were, doing nothing. Offering no real help. You gulp in another breath of air, feeling only a fraction of it reach your lungs, so you try again and again. Soon your breaths are shallow and fast-paced.
“(Y/N)?” You hear your name but it’s distant and you can’t quite place who it is, so you ignore it, continuing to try to breathe. Except, now, that mundane task seems particularly hard. A hand is placed on your shoulder, firm. Not too hard, but enough to ground you.
“Kid?” Rossi. His voice feels close and safe. You trust Rossi. Rossi’s always been someone you could trust. You force your eyes up, meeting with the man dubbed ‘Dad 2.0’, “Take some slow, deep breaths for me,”
You follow his instructions, watching his chest rise and fall, listen to his counting slowly guiding you through. When it’s over and your breath is finally reaching your lungs, you give him a strained smile. “You okay, kiddo?”
“Yeah,” You mumbled, biting the inside of your lip, embarrassed. Rossi, reading your mind, gives you a reassuring smile and pats your shoulder.
“What’s that?” You asked.
“Hotch is calling Foyet,” Garcia rushed out.
“He’s what-” You’re cut off by Foyet’s voice.
“Agent Hotchner,”
“If you touch her-”
“Be gentle, like I was with you.”
“What the hell took you so long? I was beginning to think this phone was dead or something,” Foyet’s voice made your stomach churn. “Why so quiet you usually lash out when you’re frustrated,”
“I’m not frustrated, you’re more predictable than you think,”
“Am I?”
“You didn’t know where Haley was so you made her come to you,”
“You make me sound lazy,”
“It's just another way for you to show control,”
“Oh, that’s terrible,” Foyet mocked, you shuffled in your seat, wanting nothing more than to track him down and-
You force yourself to zone out, not wanting to hear the rest of this conversation. You couldn’t deal with the back and forth between your brother and Foyet.
“You know what I’ve been thinking? Haley looks pretty good with dark hair. She’s lost some weight, must be all the stress you’ve caused her. Where’s little man? Oh, there he is. does he like Captain America because of you?” Your breath catches in your throat. A faint ringing sounds over the phone. “That’s your wife. Sorry, ex-wife, now isn’t it? Either way hold please.”
You listen as Foyet fakes an accent, getting Haley to open the gate and let him in.
“Aaron? I really gotta go,” Then the line goes dead.
“No,” You shook your head, “No, Garcia, keep tracing it,” You point at the screen, ignoring how your fingers shook, tears getting ready to blur your vision.
“I- I can’t there’s no signal,” Garcia said, tapping at her keyboard.
“Oh God,” You mutter, “He’s got Jack and Haley,”
“Foyet has to be in control, he has Haley come to him,” Derek said, snapping you out of your panic.
“Yeah, but where would he take her?” Reid asked.
“He wants Aaron to find him, to see where he was, to see what he did,” JJ stated, looking anxiously at the rest of the team.
“Which means…?”
“He said something on that call which tells Hotch where to go,” Rossi summarised.
You listen to Reid reciting the phone call, furrowing your eyebrows, “Aaron and Haley’s house has a gate.”
Within seconds, you’ve all piled into cars, speeding towards Aaron’s old house. Derek whipping his phone out, calling Aaron. “He’s going to your house… I’m sending a full tactical deployment… We’re on our way.” Then, the phone call is over and you’re all sat in silence.
You phone starts buzzing moments later, and you immediately answer it, seeing Garcia’s name flash on your screen.
“Foyet’s calling Hotch,”
“Garcia, can you get us on?” Morgan asks. Normal Garcia would answer that with a witty comment about being magnificent, today, however, she didn’t reply, instead simply patching the phone call through to your phone.
“Foyet,” Aaron’s tone is sharp. He’s pissed (understandably).
“Aaron? You’re okay?” Relief floods your body hearing Haley’s voice over the phone. You could make it there in time. You could. You had to.
There’s a pause before Aaron answers. The dread making its way into his voice, you hear it crack ever so slightly towards the end of the sentence. “I’m fine,”
“But he said that- oh Aaron,” You heard the moment she realised in her voice. How she choked up, eyes probably welling with tears, heart racing.
“He can hear us right?”
“Yes. I am so sorry,”
“Haley, show him no weakness, no fear,”
“I know,” You hear Haley take a deep breath in an attempt to calm herself down. “Sam told me all about it, is he, um?”
“No Sam is fine,”
“Aaron, Aaron, Aaron, is that why your marriage broke up? Because you’re a liar?”
“Don’t listen to him, Haley.”
“I have Sam’s service phone right here, they sent out a mass text about his death, you can take a look if you want,”
“He’s trying to scare you,”
“Did you even tell her what this was about? About the deal?”
“He’s just trying to make you angry.” Desperation leaks through Aaron’s voice despite trying to keep himself together as much as he can. He’s just a man, he can’t help it. He so desperately wants to get to Haley and Jack. To his family. He wants them to be okay, he wants Foyet dead or behind bars, he wants him and Haley to get remarried, and he wants the life he once knew back. But you don’t always get what you want.
“Well, she should be. She’s gonna D-I-E because of your inflated ego.” You clench your fists, ignoring how the nails dig into your palms, tensing your jaw you continue to stare ahead, willing Derek to just drive a little faster.
“Ignore him, Haley,”
“I’m sure you don’t want her to know this part either,” Foyet paused, “You know all he had to do was stop looking for me and we wouldn’t be in this mess,”
“Don’t react,” Aaron responds.
“What is he talking about?” You can hear the plea in Haley’s voice.
There’s a small pause. “Tell Jack I need him working the case,”
“What?”
“Tell Jack I need him working the case,”
“Jack, did you hear that?” Muffling sounds come from the phone as it’s passed over to Jack.
“Hi daddy,” Your hand moves up to your face, covering your mouth as you look out the window. You wanted nothing more than to sob, knowing what was going to happen. But you had to hold it together. You had to. There was no choice in this, you had to get to that house - the one that Aaron had taken you into when you went to live with him at sixteen. The one you had tried to sneak in drunk at 1 am when you were seventeen, Aaron chewing you out about being responsible before Haley made you go up to bed. The one where you had watched your nephew grow up in. You had to get home and save your family. You had to be there for them. You had to be there for your brother.
“H-i buddy,”
“Is George a bad guy?”
“Yes he is, but Jack, I need you on this case with me. Do you understand? I need you to work the case with me,”
“Okay, daddy,”
“Jack hug your mum for me,”
“Mum you hug me too tight,”
“I’m sorry,”
“Why are you sad?”
“I just love you so much.” You sniff, wiping the tears from your eyes in a quick motion before you take a deep breath, your gaze out the window growing hard as you force your emotions into a small box the best you can.
“Mum I gotta go I'm working the case,”
“Okay.”
“He’s so cute he’s like a little Junior Gman, I’ll be right up jacky-boy,” Your breath caught in the back of your throat.
“Is he gone?”
“Yes.”
“You’re so strong Haley, you’re stronger than I ever was,”
“You’ll hurry, right?”
“I know you didn’t sign on for this,”
“Neither did you.”
“I’m sorry for everything,”
“Promise me that you will tell him how we met, and how you used to make me laugh,” You had given up trying to wipe away the tears that traced down your face, opting to tilt your head down and hope that Rossi and Morgan couldn’t see them.
“Haley-”
“He needs to know that you weren’t always so serious Aaron - I want him to believe in love because it is the most important thing but you need to show him. Promise me.”
“I promise.” It’s silent, the only sound being Haley’s heavy breaths as she desperately tries to calm herself.
You flinch, hand going over your mouth when the gunshots start. You blinked the tears out of your eyes. You couldn’t let your emotions get the better of you. Not now. You had to get there, get Jack, be there for your family.
“Drive faster,”
“(Y/N)-”
“I don’t care about whatever the fuck you’re gonna say, just drive faster,” You snapped.
When Derek pulls up, you’re out of the car before it’s fully stopped. Gun drawn, ready to shoot if needed - and you firmly held the belief that you would not hesitate if it did come down to that.
“Aaron?” You ask, making your way past Morgan, approaching your brother, watching as he repeatedly punched Foyet. “Aaron? He’s dead, Aaron, stop!” When he failed to stop, you moved forward, wrapping your arms around him. “It’s okay, it’s okay,” You murmur, desperately trying to get him to calm down at least a little bit. He turned his head into your chest, sobbing loudly as he did so. You sat, holding your brother, trying to keep your breath steady.
“Aaron, Aaron, I need you to listen to me,” You said softly, “Where would Jack hide?”
You follow Aaron as he stands, pushing himself away from you and staggers to his office. His strides were long and desperate, but you kept up. You watch, close behind Aaron as he opens the seat.
“I worked the case, daddy, just like you said,” The relief that flows over you is indescribable and you shut your eyes and thank God for small mercies.
“You did a great job, buddy,”
“What happened to you, daddy?”
“I’m okay, I want you to go outside with Ms Jareu, okay?”
“Come here sweetheart,”
When you see that Jack is okay, you head over to the master bedroom. Seeing Morgan about to bend down, you shake your head. “I’ll do it,” You mumble, ignoring the lump in your throat. You don’t wait for him to agree, instead, you kneel beside Haley, gently taking her hand in yours before you check her pulse. Hearing footsteps, you watch as your brother approaches, kneeling down opposite you, taking in Haley’s features.
“I’m so sorry, Hotch,” Morgan says behind you. You watch as he scoops Haley into his arms, bringing her close to his chest as he sobs into her shoulder. You sit, a silent witness, as your brother sobs over the body of his high school sweetheart. The one woman he’s ever loved. The mother of his child. You stand up.
"Can you- Can you watch him?" You asked quietly, turning to Morgan. Morgan nodded. "Okay, I just- I just need some air,"
You stumbled out of the room, thankful that it was unnoticed by Aaron. You blink, the image of Haley's lifeless body flashes against your eyelids. You ignore everyone you pass asking if you’re okay. You follow the hall, down the stairs, trying to ignore the bloodstains that scattered the floor. When you reach the living room, you realise they’ve moved Foyet’s body. You walk out the front door - it’s already open, so you don’t close it behind you. You walk down the front steps, heading straight to the corner of the front garden. You grip the fence tightly as you throw up what little food you have in your stomach, after, you let out a loud, heart-wrenching sob seeing that no one else was outside. You place a hand over your mouth for a moment before you’re throwing up again. And again.
You jump when a hand softly touches your back. Turning your head slightly, you see the concerned gaze of Morgan. You face the fence again, wiping your mouth with the back of your hand, ignoring how it shakes. “Aaron-?”
“And Jack are both with JJ and Rossi outback,” Morgan reassured. You nod slightly, your hand returning to it’s previous position on the fence. Morgan takes a step forward, ready to continue to comfort, should you need to throw up again.
“I’m fine, you don’t need to stay here,” You whisper, waving him off.
“I know,” He responded. “Sometimes we all need a little company,” Any other time, Derek’s reply would have given you butterflies. Now, it simply choked you. Haley would say that to Aaron when you were younger. You would turn up at their door, unannounced, you, Aaron, and Sean (if he wasn’t at a friend’s house). Aaron would apologise for taking up her time and she would chuckle, placing a hand on his arm.
“Sometimes we all need a little company,” She would smile. You would watch as your brother gave her a shy smile in response, pink dusting his cheeks.
What were you supposed to say? You don’t know you’re sobbing until Derek pulls you tightly to his chest.
“It’s okay,” He mumbles, gently rubbing his hand in circles on your back. You grip the back of his shirt tighter, sobbing harder as you shake your head.
“No, no it’s not,” You whisper, “She’s gone. She- She got Aaron- both of us- through so much. How are we gonna-? How’s Jack gonna-?”
“You will all be fine, do you hear me?” Derek asked strongly, “You will all be okay,”
You gave one last sniff before removing yourself from Derek’s embrace (despite wanting to stay there forever). Wiping away the evidence of tears, you take a deep breath. “I’m okay now,” You said, nodding before you repeat it. This time stronger. “I’m okay,”
Derek looked at you, unsure, but didn’t argue.
You swallowed, “I’m going to go check on Aaron and Jack,”
Morgan nods, following you around back, saying that he needed JJ and Rossi for the reports. On any other day, you'd see through his excuse.
You wake up, turning over, a groan on your lips. A few days had passed, and you were currently sleeping on the couch in Aaron's apartment. Aaron and Jack both asleep in Aaron's bed. Jack hadn't wanted to leave Aaron's side recently, which was completely understandable and expected. You had to go back to work today, Strauss wanted a run down on everything that had happened. Aka, she wanted a way in which she could pin everything on Aaron.
You were all up and dressed for the day before Jessica came round. Jessica had offered to watch Jack whilst you two went to work, you for the day, and Aaron for the interview. But Jack had cried and cried until Aaron said that he could come with you both, Aaron telling Jessica to make herself at home in his apartment whilst they were gone.
And so, the three of you walked into the bullpen together. You and Aaron both in suits, Jack holding Aaron's hand dressed smartly and clutching his beige rabbit teddy (Snuggles) in his other hand. Garcia greeted you all with a hug (and some sweets for Jack, and then you when you looked at her in betrayal). Everyone was hot on her heels in greeting you.
"I hate to be the bearer of bad news," Anderson said, walking up to you, "But Strauss wants to see you,"
You walk into the room, not sure what to expect. You're one of the last ones to go in, but you haven't seen anyone who could tell you what's going on. You sit in front of Strauss.
“Please say your name and rank for the record,”
“Supervisory Special Agent (Y/N) Hotchner,”
“How long have you been working at the BAU?”
“Er,” You took a moment, “Four years? No, no, five, sorry,”
"Do you think Agent Hotchner acted irrationally?"
“Oh my god, it’s like you just want to say this is all his fault and be done with it,” You groaned, “And honestly, if that’s all you’re going to do, just get it over with,”
“Agent Hotchner-”
“What?” You asked sharply. “You’re keeping me from my family right now and they need me,”
Strauss sighed, “Do you think this could have been prevented if Agent Hotchner waited for backup,”
“I think my nephew would be dead too if he did,” You answer bluntly. “Is that all?”
"Yes Agent Hotchner," Strauss said tightly, knowing she wasn’t going to get anywhere asking you questions. "That is all. Please send your brother in,"
"Yes ma'am," You shut the door behind you and head straight to the briefing room. "Hey Aaron, you're up. The bitc- boss wants to speak to you," You smile innocently as Aaron gives you a glare for your close call with bad language around Jack.
"Okay. Watch Jack for me, and no bad language,"
"Sir yes sir," You respond, Aaron rolls his eyes. When he's gone you turn to Jack. "You're my favourite," You whisper, Jack giggles running at you, hugging your legs. "Come on, shall we go explore?" When Jack nods you pick him up.
"I can walk uncle (Y/N)," Jack giggles, placing Snuggles on your shoulder.
"I know, you're like ten!" You exclaim.
"I'm four," Jack laughs. You stop, looking at him in confusion.
"What? No, you're not, I could have sworn you were getting ready to learn to drive,"
"Nu-uh!" Jack says, "Daddy says it's bad you swear,"
"Your Daddy had a mouth like a sailor when he was my age all those centuries ago," Jack looked at you, confused. "I'll tell you when you're older,"
"Otay!" Jack chimed, turning back to Snuggles.
"Hey, Jack," You whispered, "Shall we go beat up Uncle Derek? I reckon we could take him down together,"
Jack giggled, nodding his head, "Yeah!"
"Charge!" You exclaimed, Jack quickly joining in as you ran towards Derek (who was just trying to get a cup of coffee).
"Agh!" Derek yelped as you charged into him (gently, not wanting to hurt Jack). "Alright, you got me, you got me! I surrender!"
"Never let them give up!" He yelled, you gave a cheer, setting Jack down so you could both attack. Derek 'fell' to the floor.
"Rossi, quick, help!" Derek called out, extending an arm to the older man, who shook his head with a chuckle.
"Ha ha!" Jack laughed. Derek scrambled up, exaggerating as he did so.
"That's it," Derek said, shaking his head, he grabbed Snuggles who had somehow fallen to the floor. "Stay back or Snuggles gets it!"
You and Jack exchanged a look before tackling Derek to the floor.
"What's going on?" Aaron asked eyebrows raised at the three of you.
"He started it," You and Jack chimed, pointing at each other. Derek gave a loud snort.
“(Y/N), what happened?” Your brother asked, turning to you.
“He started it,”
Jack looked at you in disbelief, you turned, whispering, “One of us had to take the fall, man,”
Aaron rolled his eyes, “I’m grounding you,”
“Ha ha,” Jack laughed seeing the confusion on your face.
“What? I’m not a kid you can’t ground me-”
“Yes I can,” Aaron grinned, knowing your next question would be why, he continued “And I’m grounding you because you’re trying to blame a four year old,”
“Ugh, this is so unfair,” You groaned.
#criminal minds#aaron hotchner#derek morgan#criminal minds fanfiction#spencer reid#david rossi#emily prentiss#penelope garcia#x male reader#y/n hotchner#male reader#hotch has another brother#reader is said brother#brother reader#hotch x brother reader#haley brooks#jack hotchner#jennifer jareau
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4 AM Masterlist
Summary: When Aaron's marriage crumbles and he finds himself alone, there's only one person he wants to turn to. Inspired by @foxy-eva Criminal Minds Writing Challenge. Prompt: Person A didn't know where else to go in a time of need, so they ring B's doorbell
Pairing: Aaron Hotchner x Haley Hotchner (post-slash?), eventual Hotch x blank slate Fem!Reader (no use of y/n)
Word Count: 3.4k
Warnings: Unrequited love, discussions of divorce and parenting, Hotch's take on Haley leaving him, big sexy man cries a little, mentions of cases, angsty, eventual happy ending, more warnings will be added with pt 2
4 AM
When Aaron's marriage crumbles and he finds himself alone, there's only one person he wants to turn to. Luckily, he knows that your door is always open for him; no matter what time it is (Wc 3.4k)
5 AM
Coming soon
#masterlist#hotchsbitchmasterlist#4 AM#5 AM#aaron hotchner x fem reader#aaron hotcher x female reader#hotch x female reader#hotch x fem reader#hotch x you#aaron hotchner#haley hotchner#hotch x reader#aaron hotchner x you#aaron hotchner x reader#cm fanfic#criminal minds fanfiction#criminal minds fanfic#aaron hotchner fanfic#aaron hotchner fanfiction#criminal minds#hotch fanfiction#criminal minds angst#hotch fanfic
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It’s investigation time. Technically he should wear his mask because he’s still a well-known lawyer but it’s an “artistic” choice.
(I already regroup all the layer when I though about the mask lmao sorry I’m lazy sometimes)
#aaron hotchner#criminal minds#criminal minds art#criminal minds fanart#ASTV x CM#SpiderHotch#now i need to do Derek version#and some of their domestic life#Vahineri’s_art#remind me to work more on this AU because all the team and Jess are here#Jessica Brooks and Haley are ultra important in this story too#Hotchgan forever but they met earlier in their life hehe#I mean Hotch is one of the Spider-Man since his 16/17#Why create complicated background when I could just do some rectangle and play with the perspective and the colour#and if you’re wondering#he’s the horizontal one
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