#haven’t been to a kings game for a long time
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I’m hoping that guy who won free LA Kings tickets for tonight’s game from being caller 25 on the radio is going to have a good time tonight. I would really love to win but no especially it’s against the Canucks.
#la kings#vancover canucks#quinn hughes#elias pettersson#hockey#nhl#haven’t been to a kings game for a long time#i keep calling and calling but the line was busy#i wish I was caller 25#crypto.com arena#oh well#next time if they make a playoffs#hopefully
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i keep thinking about like. how the brutality levels vary between seasons and how secret life is the natural culmination of everything these people have been through and the watchers pushing everything to extremes. i’m going to try to articulate how crazy this makes me
3rd Life: god. 3rd life was a clear cut war. we haven’t seen a season since where nearly everyone has such an intense devotion to their chosen faction. the fact that there’s no precedent that they’re coming back next season, the fact that as far as they know, dying means staying dead, makes just how much they’re willing to go down with the ship that much more heartbreaking. grian ended the season exactly how it was played by damn near everyone else— i love you, i would do anything for you, i would rather die than keep going without you. the season of widows.
Last Life: and then they come back. and then ending things isn’t an option. and all of a sudden it’s not a war, it’s a death match, and damn is the competition is vicious. deaths are more often than not a vague, impersonal thing— not get away from my king, my husband, my charge— just the flash of a knife and a quick sorry, just playing the game! if 3rd life told you to hold the ones you love close, defend them to your last breath, last life urges you to burn that love out of your chest entirely.
Double Life: but everything slows down eventually. no more dying for the one you love— just learning to live with them. double life is about knowing that when you die, you will go together, hand and hand into the dark. a soap opera, the players joke. a small kindness, the universe replies. again, pearl wins the same way everyone else lost— no, not yet, please, just give us a little longer together, i’m not ready, i’m so sorry—
Limited Life: but the clock, unyielding, ticks ever onward. and god, everyone is starting to feel it. that sick, nauseating feeling of dread creeping up on them: what if it never ends? what if this is it, this is all that’s left for us— tearing each other apart over and over and over again, and for what? for a show? to feed those hungry things lurking in the dark? we’ll give them a show. bombs rain from the sky, the world shaking under the weight of it. there isn’t a thing left by the end that’s not rubble. we’re all doomed! the players cry, laughing with nothing but nihilistic, unrestrained joy. none of it matters! we come back again, and again, and again, have a little fun with it! light the fuse, collateral be damned. when death means so little, what’s the point in pretending they don’t take a little joy in it? we settle this like grian and scar before us, scott jokes, armor and weapons tossed to the side. are you insane? martyn thinks, remembering the hollow look that would wash over grian’s face when he thought no one was watching. it ruined him. it will not ruin me. this is a death match for a reason.
Secret Life: and here it is. the natural conclusion. this season is candy colored, the map dotted with cute pink houses and silly builds, the players all running around doing these ridiculous tasks. it’s so easy to forget how bloody this season was. unclosing wounds, bruises that don’t fade, the sting of fire or falling from a simple misstep. the hurt never goes away, but it gets easier to ignore— distract yourself with something silly to pass the time: spyglasses and frogs and the ugliest house you’ve ever seen and matching leather jackets and the doghouse and the relationSHIP and a weird tunnel full of doors and secret soulmates and god it’s almost, almost, enough to forget how much it all aches, how much the grief weighs on you, how many times someone you love has died, sometimes to your own blade. almost none of the grudges you hold are real by now, not really. not when you’re going to live and die with these people for as long as the hungry, many-eyed things delight in your suffering. you love each other, in the strangest way— sure you’ve all killed and betrayed each other in a thousand different ways, but at the end of the day, they’re all you have. clinging to each other in the face of the vast, unknowable horrors that drive you to slash each other to pieces. it’s still a game, after all. they’ve gotta figure out how to be good sports about it eventually.
#I DONT KNOW IF I SUCCEEDED IN ARTICULATING WHAT IM TRYING TO SAY BUT GOD#it kills me how as the brutality goes up in each series so does the sillyness factor#god#trafficblr#3rd life#last life#double life#limited life#secret life#eyesandears#<— tagging it cause it kinda alludes to martyns watcher stuff yk yk#god how else do i tag this#gonna tag the winners i mentioned and call it a day#grian#inthelittlewood#pearlescentmoon#mouse.txt
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u and jude being in the same friend group and ur all together on a trip, though jude has been in love with you since day one and on the first night there u two sleep together, leaving u confused and wishing for more knowing things couldn’t be the same after the special night <3
no one knows - jude bellingham x reader.
quick sum: request above!
wc: 2.5k | masterlist | jude’s masterlist
psa 🗣️: hii!! ik i said this would be posted sooner but i got sidetracked (what’s new… also don't hate me i didn't proof read...) ANYWAYS... this does contain small bit of smut so minors dni! like always hope you enjoy 🤍
the soft waves of the hammock you laid on rocked slowly as you stared out into the almost night sky. the different shades of orange now purple and blue, tiny star appearing in the distance, waves hitting the shore making the whole atmosphere just at peace. it was a king day of travel, having missed your first flight due to a delay on the train.
you had arrived last, but it didn’t matter because you were finally with your friends, wanting to make most of the trip you had planned. you changed into a knitted crème color swimsuit, loving how it fit and hugged your figure, accentuating your curves and pushing up your cleavage just right.
everyone inside was asleep, but you couldn’t go to sleep without wanting to watch the night fall. you loved the beach, the smell, the feel of sand, how your hair went to its natural state, and the feeling of freedom. you quickly got distracted by the click of the door opening, footsteps approaching where you were.
“hi,” you squeak as you see jude lean against the palm tree pole, shirtless and wearing similar shorts as your bathing suit. “you okay? you were the last to arrive and your here alone,” jude asked softly not being able to hold back the gulp at how dreamingly your body looked under this ray and light.
“i’m okay… just can’t sleep for some reason,” you stifle a small laugh, “plus i haven’t seen a view like this in so long, i just wanted too see it, i mean take a look.” jude obliged, looking around in a daze at how the night sky looked now. “yeah you’re right… i feel at ease,” jude nodded.
“how come you’re still up? is everything okay with you?” you sat up, propping your elbow and the back of your hand resting on your temple, your full attention on jude. you couldn’t deny but feel a tad bit confused he was here. jude never really spoke to you an when he did it was short and simple. so you wouldn’t be surprised if he made small talk and left.
“jet leg i guess? you’d think after all the constant travel i’d be used to it but it’s always difficult to fall asleep after a long flight for me,” jude explained taking a seat on the wood chair that was by the balcony. you hummed in response, your hand dragging up from your thigh to your hip letting it rest.
you sensed he wanted to tell you more, his fingers tapping against his massive and toned thighs, his eyes adverting from you to the sea. jude wasn’t shy, quite the opposite, and he knew in this moment it was now or never. “do i make you nervous?” you ask slyly, standing and walking over to him. you hated feeling awkward and left out around him, and you needed to know the reason behind it.
jude was a complete different person in his games, in public, around your friends, yet, he treats you so differently which threw you off the edge. jude roamed your eyes from your tanned shiny legs, your curved torso and bust, his heart stammering against his chest as you looked so willingly and utterly beautiful. “or do you just hate me?”
“hate you? why would i hate you?”
“don’t know… you tell me. it’s like this every time we’re around each other. the tension? you can’t even look into my face? you barely speak a word to me? if i’ve done something to offend you, let me know so i can apologize,” you spoke dearly, following his exact movements by roaming your eyes on his figure. legs spread out begging to be touch, abs defined, with veins adorning his arms. jude was fucked, all he could think about was you in this damn bathing suit and the silly theory you made in your head.
hate you? that’s impossible.
“what if i told you it was the opposite? what if i told you i’m infatuated by you?” jude looked up, standing and over towering you, your gaze shifted from confident to shy. your eyes lowering as jude looked down at you. “that when i’m around you all i can think about is you. how you look, smile, talk and walk, smell… it’s so infuriating to be this madly in love with you and not being able to do a thing about it…” jude confessed, drawing the air out of your lungs, like the wind that breezed the night sea.
“i feel like you’re lying to me…” you couldn’t help but say. a hesitance of insecurity, and that’s there’s absolutely no way this man was in love or was confessing any sort of feelings when actions proved otherwise. “why would i lie to you hm? i’m being completely truthful here y/n,” god the way he said your name had you trembling your knees. “you can’t be jude. we’re so different-”
“that’s what you think, and it’s all in your head. tell me this second you don’t feel it? the magnitude sensation for me to approach you? i can see it in your pretty face darling. now it’s you who can’t even look at me? or yet talk,” jude inches closer to you, seeing your chest rapidly raise up and down.
“you’re everything to me… i’ve had to resist myself because i have no idea if you feel the same way. i’d rather love you from a distance than be embarrassed and you not liking me back…” jude traced with his fingertips along your forearm. “don’t you see it? everything i’ve done it’s because of you… i wouldn’t be here if you weren’t y/n. i just want you…” his pleading and vulnerability in his voice had you gulping a response.
“let me show it to you hm? how you make me feel… how you deserved to be treated,” you nodded feeling the heat rise in you. the familiar desire to be wanted, appreciated, touched by a man like jude. “please jude…” you said in a small whimper, looking up where jude had a hungry gazed, lips slightly open. “show me-”
you remembered how cool the wall was when he hit your back against it, kissing you deeply, so messy and hot. how his hands traveled from your side and around your spine, gripping your ass as he ran his tongue down from your jaw and pulse point. you could feel everything, how big jude was, how hot his skin was to your touch, how desperate the need was.
he had dragged you to his room, his lips never leaving yours any second. it was so vivid in your head, how your back pressed against his chest, how his fingers slowly traced your abdomen down to inside your bottoms, his fingers covered by you slick coat, adding the bit-test of pressure on you clit rubbing it in small circles. all you could focus on was the determination and how hot he looked like this.
jude untied the bows from your bottoms, freeing you completely. he felt like he would die any second, this was real and no turning back. he could’ve watched you all night like this. so sensitive with the smallest touch.the familiar burn in your tummy when he sunk into you with a forceful thrust, hips curling and rocking to pleasure waves of emotions, the heat between your legs as he talked you through it all. the flicker in his eyes when you moaned and begged his name, how your nails scratched against his back asking for more and more.
“you belong to me… don’t you forget that y/n…” he kissed you sloppy, pushing one last thrust and spilling into you. it wasn’t just one round, he made sure to take you against the wall, balcony, shower, and the small couch in his room, in many positions too. he wanted to savor the moment like he imagined. this was way better than his dreams and thoughts in his head. you were so tight, so wet, very much made exactly for him.
the heavy weight on top you made you wake up early. you were used to waking up this early, but not with a hot body on top of you. with one eye barely open you looked at the digital clock, showing just before 7am, the whole house quiet. you looked around before your eyes landed on a sleepy jude, tucked between your arm and head nuzzled into your neck.
your heart raced, not being able to control your confused and guilty emotions. last night was real then? not a sick dream in your head or a movie, it had happened here in his room. “oh shit…” you whispered, chest sinking down as your controlled your breathing. you had to get out, feeling a tad stuck and rushed in space. this wasn’t supposed to happen… even though it felt so right. so meant to be.
you had managed to sneak jude to his back without waking him up. his lips pursed and brown drawn in, breathing heavy. you changed quickly back to your bikini, leaving the room how you had remembered. you ran a hand against your hair, the need to throw water in your face to cool the warmth in your cheeks. you weren’t used to this. you never did one night stands or had friends with benefits relationships. if that’s even what it was.
you couldn’t help but think maybe jude was lying to just get into your pants. you had seen how jude was like when around other woman. but you weren’t other woman. you we’re y/n. the shy but outgoing, smart but naive, and overly patient y/n. you didn’t want it be like them, or seen like them either. all you could think of was him. his brown eyes and stupid gentlemen demeanor.
you avoided him anywhere he was or walked in. the only way you could escape and let go of things was this. you weren’t used to this and didn’t have much experience so you did what you were best at which was ignore jude. but even your friends had noticed you were off and that there was a glow to you. drawing attention from everyone and the person who caused it all.
a small part of you did have a twinge of faith… what if he wasn’t lying? what if everything he proved to you last night was exactly how he felt? what if he was madly in love with you? that you were the woman of his dreams? that it wasn’t just sex and there was raw emotions included?
the ghost feeling against your back made you shiver, realizing it was jude who stood behind you, locking you with both arms extending out to cage you in as you cut up fruit. “you left me this morning,” jude spoke into your ear, feeling your weight shift from one foot to another. “i didn’t want anyone to catch us,” you say shaky, making up a lie knowing part of it was true.
“you’re lying to me…”
“am not. let me go… i-i-i need to bring this outside.”
“you are darling, you think i didn’t notice? you can’t even look at me without talking to me, and you’ve ignored me the whole day thinking i haven’t realized that,” jude let you go but followed behind you speaking a little louder. “lower your voice! i haven’t said anything to anyone!” you hiss, grabbing his wrist and dragging him to the pool room. “what is it you want from me?” you say pleading.
“i want you! i thought i made that clear last night. not just with sex, but with my confession? before we fell asleep? don’t tell me you forgot that,” you shook your head. “i’m just having trouble to process all this, jude… i feel like we’re making a huge mistake…”
“to whom? to our friends? or to you?” jude asked sincerely. you always seemed to put them first over yourself and jude noticed that. “why would it be a mistake? if at the end of the day what we have is real…”
“jude it’s been one night together between us! look at us now! i can’t risk our group falling if we don’t work out jude! it’s not fair to them, to me and you!” you tried to reason but jude shook his head. he stood up from where he leaned, his broad frame over towering yours again.
“why are you so adamant we won’t work? we’ve barely been given a shot here! you’re overthinking it y/n. they don’t have to know a single thing pretty girl, not unless you don’t want them too.but for once think of what you want and your heart desires. not what your friends say. forget them and for once think about yourself,” jude spoke, grabbing your hands.
“i want us to work more than anything y/n. i’m not lying to you and have never gave you the reason either. i’m a good man y/n. just let me in here,” he poked your heart, seeing a sad smile appear on your face. “we can’t be so quick to judge without even trying! why is it so hard to do that? i just want to be with you, i’ve suffered enough as it is already,” jude was pleading, wanting to do anything to keep you here with him.
“and if we do and i lose you jude? people have walked in and straight out of my life. what if we try and it’s going so well just for us to part? i can’t handle losing someone else i love,” you whimper, tears of exhaustion and pain let out. “imagine me now and then? i’ve always thought what’s best for myself and i’m just confused jude… why me?” your voice sounded strained and from another dimension.
“why not you? you’re perfect y/n. anyone who thinks other wise must have been dropped into their head. you have everything that makes me so drawn to you… your eyes… your smile… your way of being… your hair… your everything. you’re everything i want and i’m willing to prove that to you however you ask. just let me be the man you need pretty girl…” jude rested his forehead against yours, his thumb stroking your jaw as you began to fall deeper into this new wave and world with him.
“no one knows. just me and you jude,” you kissed him feverently. the aching burn in your chest as he kissed you with such devotion and power. you shivered beneath him, arms wrapping around his neck and pulled him closer. jude let out a small groan gripping your hips and pushing you to his lower body. there was no self-control here, no professionalism. he quickly became your favorite taste, and feeling. just two humans brought together in the most correct and soulmate way.
two humans who had no idea what was ahead of them.
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Prompt: Because the Infinite Realms exists outside of time and space, the Ghost King summoning ritual is akin to pulling a random draw on a Gacha Game. The stronger the king, the rarer the summon.
Danny is the strongest :)
I refreshed my ask box and hoo boy there are a lot more asks than I was expecting lol Thank you for the prompt!
-
“So wait, you’ve never been Summoned? Not even once?” Tim looked up from the case he’d been working on, blinking in surprise behind his mask towards where Phantom was lounging lazily several feet above the floor.
“Nope.” Phantom said, popping the P as he shifted around in mid air, long tendril leaving a familiar mildly headache inducing after image behind him as he did.
Tim’s brow furrowed. “No offense, but you’re not exactly the most secretive member of the League. How have you managed to avoid any cults getting a hold of your name to try and do a summoning ritual to capture you?”
Phantom’s grin widened, long fangs glinting against pale blue tinged skin. “I haven’t.”
Across the room, Constantine went very still. Tim slid his gaze back towards the monitor before him, glancing towards the file he’d been reviewing for the case. Zantanna’s report on how summoning worked within the Infinite Realm. How power affected the odds of being able to successfully summon an entity. Odds for most beings from Phantom’s native realm were about 50/50 on a Summoning Ritual working to pull the being to them. Those odds got significantly less favorable for the summoners the stronger the entity got.
But the entity always knew when a summoning was being performed.
“Phantom.” Tim said, slowly, turning back to the grinning ghostly hero. “How many times have people tried to summon you?”
The ghost hmmed, “No idea. If we’re talking just today? …actually still no clue.” Phantom tilted his head, considering. “But since we started talking there’s been at least a thousand or so. It’s slowed down a bit over the last few minutes. Kinda nice.”
Constantine swore a blue streak impressive enough to put Jason to shame and stood, leaving the room in a haze of cigarette smoke and exasperated mutterings of I do not get paid bloody enough for this shit and honestly? Tim thinks he has a point.
Phantom smiles again.
Well, Tim considers, at least they won’t have to worry about him getting yanked in the middle of a battle.
#spaced asks and ace answers#dp x dc writing prompt#dpxdc#dc x dp#dp x dc#danny phantom#danny fenton#tim drake#john constantine#ghost king danny#it isn't said but its a fact lol#John had a eureka moment on just what exactly Danny's deal is and would like to be literally anywhere else now thanks lol
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Part of Fionna’s frustrations with Mundanewold were subconscious longings for her old life of magical adventure, but a lot of her problems tied more into deeply-rooted issues of monotony and a feeling like she can't do anything to change her lot in life and like her actions don’t matter.
And it does seem like Fionna and Friends’ lives have been kinda Stuck in a Rut - especially when you compare the way their lives parallel and diverge from their Mainworld counterparts. Most of the differences are... rather than just different choices diverging into different arcs - it’s the same arc, but the Fionnaworld characters are just stuck behind.
Fionna is still reeling from the breakup with DJ Flame and only met Hunter at the very day our story starts. Marshall Lee has more Unresolved Issues with his mom compared to Marceline and her dad. He and Gumball haven’t even met yet. Not to mention the Mundaneworld-specific problems like Fionna being unable to hold a steady job or Gary eternally spinning his wheels about opening his own bakery.
Fionna thought she wanted a world of magic, but while the added bits of strangeness and whimsy to Fionnaworld by the end of the show are certainly a cool fun bonus (and Cake is surely thankful to have the ability to freely think and speak her mind and stretch) - what Fionna and friends were really missing was a world where their actions matter, where things change, where they are real.
And especially important for Fionna and Cake to admit it, because handling the fact their actions have consequences has been a huge part of both of their character arcs. For Cake it was all about getting used to the fact that her newfound human-like sapience means being measured against human-like morality. For Fionna it's about not comparing everything in her life to video games and thinking through her actions at least a little bit.
Consequences are the thing Fionna and Cake struggled with the most, but it was what they were missing all along.
Now this seems to be, like, an actual metaphysical thing. I mean, the show hasn’t gone super into detail of how Fionnaworld worked but it does seem like Prismo’s stories had an active role in moving the events of the World forwards, possibly using the same event-manipulating-Magic that make sure his Wishes have that Obligatory Ironic Twists?
And once Ice King turned back to Simon, Prismo lost all ability to observe or create stories for Fionnaworld. And what happens to characters of a story once the writer can’t access their external hard-drive anymore? They just sorta get stuck. Moving their own lives forwards without Prismo’s stories is just a lot harder.
And if there is some sort of force in control behind the scenes of Fionnaworld at the start of the series, it’s only Simon’s subconscious - a fact F&C alludes to numerous times
And at the start of the show, how was Simon’s feeling about his own life?
In addition to Simon’s longing and memories for the pre-War world shaping the exact form of Fionna’s nonmagical world, perhaps his feelings of ennui and depression and helplessness have also subtly ‘infected’ this world?
It is perhaps not a coincidence that Marshall Lee and Gary Prince’s storyline only starts moving forwards after Simon embarks on the adventure and starts climbing out of his mental rock bottom. When things seem to move forwards for him as well.
As such, ‘Canonizing’ Fionnaworld solves more of Fionna’s problems much more than simply making it as magical as Ooo but keeping it as a tiny hidden bubble in someone's dome. It ensures the World’s inhabitants’ free will and agency and ability to enact change on the status quo with no need for Prismo’s stories or being dependent on the still-kinda-shaky mental health of Simon Petrikov. Thus giving them a world where everything matters and things can always change.
But also there's a psychological element for the Fionnaworld protagonists. You know, the reason why Fionna is stuck in her rut is because she’s too impulsive and careless. Gary is too perfectionist. Marshall never had someone who would stand up to him against his mom.
Fionna’s whole arc in the show is about learning to be more thoughtful and careful and considerate through her Multiverse Adventure. While Gary and Marshall Lee find release from the thing holding them back within Fionnaworld, with each other.
‘Canonizing’ Fionnaworld is like... half actively altering their world into a ‘real’ one where change is possible, or at least easier - and half about an affirmation that their world was always real because change is about them outgrowing their personal issues (and also, y’know, about protecting their universe from the spiteful Beetle Cop).
And with how Fionna used to feel ‘trapped’ in the City, with nowhere to go and nothing to do - there is another change in Fionnaworld as a result of ‘canonization’ that feels very notable.
I’m not entirely sure, but from Scarab's dialogue it seems likely that becoming a ‘real’ authorized universe just kinda manifested a whole planet and universe beyond the borders of the small existing Fionnaworld. Although I guess it's also possible that the process of repairing the existing city they found a way to expand it gradually - maybe it doesn’t matter as much as the fact that either way, Fionna’s horizons have been literally expanded.
So you know, if she ever gets that thirst for adventure again... she actually has a Whole New World to travel and explore, it might not have (a lot of) magic but... she already heard Simon's stories of his adventures in a similar low-Magic world. It's a totally viable outlet for her.
What Fionna really needed to find the joy in her life is to be Real - to know that her actions have consequences for ill and for good. Because sometimes an adventure looks like saving a Prince of candy from an evil Ice Witch, or going on a multiverse journey to uncover a cursed Magic Crown… but it can also look like backpacking through Europe or campaigning against your evil landlady.
#adventure time#atimers#fionna and cake#fionna & cake#adventure time fionna and cake#adventure time spoilers#fionna and cake spoilers#fionna and cake series#fionna and cake show#at#at spoilers#at fionna and cake#fac#fac spoilers#f&c#f&c spoilers#cheers#fionna and cake cheers#scarab#the scarab#scarab fionna and cake#fionna and cake scarab#fionna campbell#fionna the human#adventure time fionna#cake the cat#cake adventure time#adventure time cake#gary prince#prince gumball
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I triple dog dare you to write Josh futterman getting caught jerking off to a pic of y/n!!!!
Heyyy bbg I am SOOOO sorry this took me so long to get to this request, I have been dealing with final exams and tbh mental health? Down the drain lmao. I do have a fic similar to this, so if you want to read that one it is linked HERE!! I am still going to write a similar concept, however, I will change it up a little bit! I hope that you still enjoy it!
cw: smut, male masturbation, female masturbation, fluff
word count: 1,445
Being around Josh Futturman is this strange mix of contradictions that you can't quite wrap your head around. On one hand, he's this total loser, but you can't help but be infatuated with him. It's like he's the king of awkward, yet there's this undeniable charisma that draws you in. And then there's the whole "Biotic Wars" thing – he's legit addicted to that game. You can't help but roll your eyes when he starts rambling about how close he was to beating the game, but there's something oddly cute about his enthusiasm. Lately, though, there's this other layer to your friendship that you can't shake off – a subtle flutter in your chest when he laughs or those lingering looks that neither of you acknowledges. You knew you were far gone when it came to Josh, but you also knew you refused to risk your friendship with him, so you kept silent.
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Your shift came to a close and you started gathering your things when the buzzing of your phone made you jump. You looked down, seeing Josh’s name on the screen, making you smile. You pick up, greeted by the distant sounds of explosions ad gunfire – the unmistakable sounds of “Biotic Wars.” You rolled your eyes.
“Hey, y/n, what are you doing?” There was a tiredness in his voice.
“I just got off of work, I’m about to head home. What’s up with you?” You responded, realizing that it was kind of a stupid question.
“Ah, you know, same old. Just killing these biotics left and right. You should join me sometime.” You couldn’t help but chuckle.
“Maybe someday, but probably not,” he groans in a mocking way. “You wanna hang out today? Feels like I haven’t seen you in forever.”
“Yeah, absolutely,” he says, clearly distracted. “You can um – ah fuck you! Sorry, not you, I just died.” He laughed. “You can come to my place, that sound alright?” The frantic clicking of buttons started up in the background, accompanied by gunshots and occasional explosions.
“Yeah your place works,” you remark. “What time?” There was a silence from Josh, leaving the sounds of the game in the background. “Josh?”
“Sorry, sorry,” he mumbled. “How does 6 sound? It gives you a chance to get out of your work clothes and me a chance to go through a few more levels.” Clearly, he was more focused on the game.
“That works, I’ll grab pizza for us. Usual?” He ‘mhmm’s’ in response your question. “Cool, I’ll see you then.” He says a quick goodbye, hanging up quickly after. You sigh, grabbing your bag and keys, making your way to your car to head home.
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You looked at your watch, the time reading 5:42. You were typically early. Josh always left his door unlocked whenever he knew you were coming over, so you were able to walk right in. You set your bag and the pizza box on the dining table, looking up the stairs. You couldn’t hear his game playing, however you did hear noises from up the stairs. You walk up the stairs quietly, wanting to sneak up on him. Noticing his door was cracked, you took a peak in. Your breath caught in your through, letting out a soft gasp at what you were greeted with. On his computer monitor, your Instagram was pulled up, a photo of you at the beach on the screen. A heat started pooling in your core with the sight in front of you: Josh was in his gaming chair, jeans around his ankles, quickly stroking his dick. His head was lulled back, eyes half closed and tongue poking out of his mouth slightly. You stayed silent, watching his hand moved up in down in a needy pace, whimpers escaping his throat as he continued. He switched hands, shaking the one he was previously using, making you think he had been at this for a while. You bit your lower lip, your arousal becoming overwhelming. You start to think, there's no harm in touching myself too, right? With that, you quietly sit down on the floor, leaning against his doorframe. You took a look over your shoulder, making sure you did not alert Josh that you were there. You were in the clear. You let out a breath you didn’t realize you were holding. Carefully, you dip your hand down into your sweatpants, past your underwear and down to your heat. You leaned your head back against the door frame as you grazed your clit, biting on your lip to stifle any noise threatening your lips. Your eyes closed, taking in the whimpers and words coming from Josh as he continued stroking his cock. Your fingers dipped down into your heat, making you sigh. Your mind was completely clouded with the thought of your fingers being replaced by Josh’s, making a heat pool in your lower belly.
“F-fuck, y/n,” you heard Josh whimper out, making you that much closer to your own release. You circled your clit, letting out your own soft moans at this point, unable to contain them with the pleasure you were feeling. You heard Josh’s moans get more erratic as kept going, insinuating that he was close. You sped up your movements, rubbing and fingering your wet heat, finally bringing yourself to your release. You cover your mouth with your free hand, doing your best to stifle your moans, leaning your head back against the door frame and screwing your eyes shut. You sit there for a moment, catching your breath before glancing inside Josh’s room, not seeing him on his gaming chair anymore. You stand up on wobbly legs, composing yourself. You knock on his door, pushing it open.
“Hey Josh, I’m here,” you call out with a shaky voice. You hoped he wouldn’t notice. You looked at his computer, your picture no longer up. Josh was standing at his shelf, now wearing sweatpants. He turned to look at you, a smile making its way onto his face. His cheeks were a light flush of red.
“Hey!” His voice was cheerful as he made his way over to his bed. You go in, sitting next to you. He leaned in to hug you, you immediately hugging back. He moved his head to where his lips were next to your ear. “Did you like what you saw?” His voice was low and gravely. Your eyes widened, quickly pulling away from the hug to look at him. He looked nervous, his face a darker red than before. This honestly probably took a lot of confidence to say, especially for him.
“W-what?” You stutter out.
“You heard me,” he grinned.
“I um, you saw?” He just nodded. “How much?”
“Most of it, watching you is what actually made me,” he paused. “You know,” he looked away, clearly nervous now. You guess his confidence wore off.
“I-I’m sorry if I made things weird I just-” he cut you off, connecting his lips to yours gently. Your arms instinctively wrap around his neck, pulling him more into the kiss. You pull away, looking into his eyes.
“Y/n, I’ve been into you for years. You just never showed me any signs of anything, so I stayed quiet about it.” You smiled.
“honestly, josh? I have too. I was just scared.”
“You sure didn’t seem scared five minutes ago,” he smirked. You grumbled, flicking the back of his head. “You were also early, you were never supposed to see or know anything.” You shrugged.
“Well, I do now.” He looked down.
“So what now?” He said, joy and curiosity in his voice. You thought for a moment.
“well, theres pizza downstairs-“
“no, not right now, dumbass. In general. Us. What now.”
“oh,” you blushed. “You could be a gentleman and ask me on a real date, you know.” You teased him. He rolled his eyes, hiding the smile that crept onto his face.
“Sorry, sorry. Y/n, would you like to go on a date with me?” A smile lingered on his lips. You pretend to think for a moment.
“I guess, but lets just eat pizza and watch a movie tonight, how does that sound?” He nodded.
“I’ll go get the pizza,” he planted a kiss on your cheek before he left the room. You laid back on his bed, staring at the ceiling. You couldn’t believe what just happened, and frankly you were embarrassed. But you’re secrets out now and it feels good, especially knowing that he had feelings for you too. You let your eyes flutter shut, taking a deep breath, anticipating what may come within this newfound relationship that may be forming.
OMG thank you for being patient with me. I hope this is good, I honestly struggled with this one a lot for some reason, but if you enjoyed it, im glad. Have a beautiful day everyone :)
#josh hutcherson#josh futterman#michael schmidt#mike schmidt#mike schmidt imagine#mike schmidt x reader#josh hutcherson fanfic#mike schmidt smut#josh hutcherson smut#josh futturman fluff#josh futturman#josh futturman smut#josh futturman x reader#peeta mellark#peeta
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Bruh Nagi being buff as hell after Manshine's training 🥰🥰🥰
sammy you deadass bout to make me objectify this man on main SO BAD this has been running something of a small marathon in my head so 😵💫😵💫 pls accept my humble word vomit
cw. [n]sfw. mdni. pro player! nagi + aged-up characters. bit of body worship(?) you ride his abs. nipple play (m. receiving). subby nagi (but he's actually a switch >:) + some fluff bc he's so baby :(
note. a bit rambly oop soz it’s bc i went insane. i describe how he looks like to ME (re: hot as fuck) but i guess y'all can read it too hehe<3
1.4k words -> how could you ever hope to keep your hands to yourself when nagi's body looks like that.
i feel like unless you have prior knowledge of the fact that nagi is a pro athlete, from a cursory glance, your first thought upon seeing him wouldn’t be “hmm i bet that dude is built like a brick house.” it doesn’t help that nagi’s basically the unofficial king of athleisure — his closet’s chockfull of loose-fitting hoodies and sweats. he barely owns anything else besides those monochrome hooded tracksuits (and sportswear for practice, i guess he’d need some of that too lol) because he claims it’s the only outfit that gives him unlimited access to just lounge about basically anywhere he pleases. it’s what he genuinely finds to be the most comfortable style for him as well. but if you’re fortunate enough to get a peak underneath the layers of baggy clothes? dear god nagi’s built like a fever dream. amen you’ll eat so good then he’s a whole ass feast.
i’m gonna brazenly speak my truth here so don’t come for me >:( but! from what you’d consider to be “a typical footballer’s physique”, purely from that perspective, nagi’s legs are… not that impressive. his stagnant motivation has much improved ever since he committed to making a career out of soccer, but that doesn’t mean his slacker tendencies haven’t followed suit. don’t get me wrong, he still puts his all into every game so his legs are still very much capable of making your mouth water, but you won’t catch him sprinting up and down the field at full speed if he can help it. packed with lean muscle, his thighs are thick, calves well-defined with a few bold veins thinly zigzagging down the taut skin like a lightning strike on the occasion you happen to catch him after a particularly gruelling conditioning session. but compared to some of his teammates whose legs seem to be carved from iron, he’s a bit.. overshadowed.
it’s a fairly similar story with his arms. (i promise i’m not just talking shit lol i could NEVER my poor meow meow it’s gonna get so hot in a second i swear just bear with me!!!) again, it’s most definitely a drool-worthy sight. the stretch of his arms is long and sinewy, rolling with a set of generous biceps that flutter under the gentle scrap of your fingerpads and nails when he (totally intentionally) flexes the swell of muscle there. in his profession, he mostly uses his arms for balance and to create distance between himself and his opponents. buried in his private nook back home, he has a tendency to hold his phone above his head while playing mobile games — that blissfully only rarely come crashing down on his face — but his unrivalled favourite will, of course, always be enveloping you in his arms <3
nagi’s not the most expressive person, but his subtle social cues become much easier to pick up on whenever he’s sleepy, which let’s be honest is almost always. he’s in dire need of a snuggle in those moments and not only loves, but craves being close to you physically, his face a canvas of huffy evidence of what a Big Deal this is to him if you learn to read the hidden hints (it’s a pursed, pouty frown nine times out of ten he ain’t slick lmfao). he kind of regards your presence as his “recharging station” what a cringe fail soggy loser man i adore him with my whole heart 🥹 his lanky limbs will snake around you with the security of a vine until you’re all cosy and wrapped up in each other, his hold bearing enough strength to not budge against any playful escape tactics you might attempt — at least not until he decides he’s had his fair share of quality snuggle time with you.
nagi’s a practical man, however — the world doesn’t call him a lazy genius for nothing. for these, albeit lovely, purposes, he determined there’s absolutely no need to overexert himself by lifting weights to buff up his arms. he can get by just fine! there are definitely more jacked arms out there i’m sorry :(
but here’s the kicker. nagi’s tall. you could even say he’s huge — he’d tower over most people if he actually straightened his posture for once. so his muscle mass kind of stretches out a bit… unevenly throughout his body. he does have muscle mass though, plenty of it, actually, and he needs only to do one tiny little thing to remind you of it: lift his shirt up.
it’s a subconscious, everyday thing for nagi to toy with the hem of his cotton tees. his fingers often grow restless if they’re just lying about, so playing with the material of his clothes is not only stupidly ready at hand but also helps to soothe the itch brimming along his fingers to do something with them. in the process, you’re rewarded with glimpses of his stomach often when he involuntarily ends up exposing the skin clinging to those hard planes. but what’s objectively worse for your sanity is when nagi comes trudging into the kitchen to ease his thirst. he never bothers with a glass from the cupboard, just swoops down to drink from the open tap, his adam’s apple bopping rhythmically as he swallows. there’s water coating his lips when he rises, a few droplets still running down his chin that he tugs on the ends of his t-shirt to lazily wipe away. it’s an innocent endeavour to him, but a sinful display for you, as it essentially shows off his entire, deliciously shaped midriff. nagi might slack off in other areas, but his core strength is insane. his torso is like a gift from the heavens, chiselled after the image of their gods and heroes. don’t even get me started on his abs.
because i cannot stress enough how perfect nagi’s abs are for grinding your sweet, drooling little cunny on :( the ridges of muscle packed together at his abdomen are firm, but twitch almost uncontrollably when you slowly drag your cunt up and down the sculpted slabs of his stomach that bump against your poor, swollen clit in a way that makes you delirious. your thighs bracket his waist as you move, his waist that is so trim and almost tiny compared to the broad stretch of his shoulders. you can feel the coarse, light hair of his happy trail graze against your bare ass, leading to his heavy, stirring cock still confined in his sweats for now as you continue to leisurely rut your pussy down his abs, leaving a slick mess behind. the hard cut of his v-line is so prominent a thin contour of shadow clings to the underside of it.
nagi wishes desperately that he could help you, that he could sink his fingers into the plush of your skin and push you down along his abdomen to accelerate your high, dictate a more intense pace for you by his hands and make you take it, but he’s too busy being a moaning, blubbering mess underneath you to take initiative. his large palm lies dormant at your waist, the other tangled in his snowy, sweaty bangs so he doesn’t miss even a blink of the intoxicating vision you present above him. he’s drunk on every salacious sound that comes tumbling from your lips, every wanton contortion of your gorgeous face as the lewd squelching of your pussy fills his ears. his defined chest is flushed red from arousal, shuddering with shaky exhales as he all but devours the sight of you — he thinks you using him for your own pleasure is so fucking hot.
if you want to turn him into an utter wreck, whining like a bitch in heat, please please play with his nipples :( paw at his pecs all needy first, ‘n don’t be afraid to grip the flesh with the blunt of your nails. he’ll mewl about it, but you only need to shush and praise him, tell him how good he looks like this for you and he’ll behave. pinch at the pretty pink of his pebbled nipples, gently circle his areola with your tongue, sucking on the bud and nagi will lose his mind, might even cum untouched :( but that’s okay because he’s so turned on his refractory period is barely an issue, he’ll sink into your tight, sloppy walls in one go and fuck you absolutely senseless on his cock. it’s all you can do to scramble for purchase with your trembling fingers, marking up the milky expanse of his broad back and mouthing at his collarbones to stifle your near pornographic keens and cries as he mercilessly splits you open.
in conclusion nagi seishiro is built like a wet dream and i want him carnally </3
#i rewrote this like three times so i’m just releasing it into wild now bc i’m sick of it lol!! i retain my right for this to be sucky hehe#haven’t written anything in a hot minute but if this causes at least one (1) person to short circuit my job here is done#nagi smut#nagi x reader#nagi seishiro x reader#nagi seishiro smut#blue lock x reader#blue lock smut#bllk x reader#bllk smut#—bllk.thirsts!#—riv.fic!
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F*ck My Thighs [M] — Lee Seokmin
!! IT IS FINALLY HERE !!
✧ In honor of Lee Seokmin's king god general emperor majesty pretty beautiful gorgeous precious elegant luxury world high top class THIGHS ✧
Ever since you started working at XTREMEGEAR, you’ve been hopelessly obsessed with Lee Seokmin...god damn Lee Seokmin and his fucking divine thighs. You didn’t think you’d ever stand a chance with him. But when your company forces you to go to a sports and wellness retreat with the whole HR department, you discover that you haven’t been as discreet about your little crush as you thought you were.
✧ Genre: workplace au; SMUT [18+], fluff, slight angst (if you squint??)
♥ Pairing: female!reader x co-worker!Lee Seokmin
✧ Word count: 17.2K+ (oops...?)
✦ Warnings: reader has an unhealthy obsession with dk's thighs and arms (honestly same), swearing, mentions of alcohol, drinking games, intoxication, some jealousy, small mention of reader comparing herself to another female co-worker, dk being a tease — pls let me know if I missed any :)
✎ Notes:
1) nsfw warnings below the cut!
2) small project where? lol
3) those arm pics were like a literal gift from god, so of course i HAD to add a little arm kink into the fic as well....ARGH!!! it's going to be the death of me someday....
4) i also added the itinerary at the end of the fic in case you're curious OR check it out here
♕ Shout out: special thanks to @forsythe-lll and @fugaciousserendipity for your valuable input ♡!
♡ REBLOGGING AND/OR FEEDBACK WOULD BE VERY MUCH APPRECIATED — DON'T BE A STRANGER PLS ♡
nsfw warnings: outdoor/public sex, thigh worship, thigh riding, fingering, slight degradation, pussy eating, squirting, unprotected sex, creampie (pls let me know if I missed any!)
“You’re drooling again,” Soonyoung’s voice sounded in your ears, startling you in your desk chair.
Reluctantly, you ripped your eyes away from the purple-haired man that you’d been observing and turned your attention to your brown-haired co-worker.
“I am not,” you grumbled, feeling a little embarrassed that you’d been caught. But then again, it wasn’t the first time that Soonyoung had caught you doing exactly that.
Your co-worker could only smirk at your poor rebuttal. “Right. Then tell me why there’s drool in the corner of your mouth.”
You gasped, your hands quickly moving up to wipe at the corners of your mouth. “What? Where?” Only there was no drool. Ugh, why did you even fall for that...again? “You’re so annoying, you know that?” you sighed, shooting Soonyoung an irritated look.
“Whatever. If it wasn’t for me, you wouldn’t get any work done.”
A desperate sigh left your lips at the truth of his statement. “I know...but he looks so good today. And I think he’s been working out more frequently, because his thighs look even more delectable than usual,” you said, once again shifting your gaze to the man you’d been crushing on for as long as you can remember.
Soonyoung wrinkled his nose at your tmi and cleared his throat rather loudly, pulling your attention back to him. “You need to get laid. Soon. Or I’m afraid you might start creaming yourself on the spot and end up getting fired.”
“Shut up, it’s not that bad,” you scowled, giving his shoulder a playful push.
“Really?” Soonyoung threw a pointed look your way. “Do you want the boss to catch you slacking again?”
“Ugh, don’t remind me. I’m still traumatized,” you groaned, burying your head into your hands as your mind flashed back to that embarrassing moment.
It was only a few months ago when your boss had scolded you for missing a deadline in front of the entire department. What he didn’t know was that you missed it because you’d been too busy ogling and obsessing over your sexy co-worker all week.
“Well, you better get it together then. If you don’t want our other colleagues to think that you’re a sex-crazed weirdo obsessed with a certain co-worker’s thighs, you might wanna rethink your strategy before Friday.” Soonyoung frowned at your puzzled look. “You didn’t forget about the retreat, right?”
Fuck. The company retreat. You actually had momentarily forgotten about that little thing.
Three whole days in the forest with your smoking hot co-worker and no way to get yourself off in private when he did something to turn you on – this was definitely an issue, considering that nearly everything the man did was arousing to you.
In other words, you were doomed. Fucking doomed.
When you first started at XTREMEGEAR, you’d been super motivated to start your first real full-time job. All those years of studying had finally paid off and landed you this job on the project implementation team of the HR department.
You met Soonyoung on your first day and the two of you had immediately clicked. Just like you, he’d been a newbie, so you got to lean on each other a lot during the initial trainee period – because working in corporate was no joke.
Now two years later, you were practically inseparable – both at work and outside of it. You were grateful to have someone like Soonyoung by your side and you truly considered him to be one of your best friends, if not your best friend. Most of your colleagues and other friends naturally assumed you were dating, but you were both always quick to burst their bubbles. You loved Soonyoung, you really did, but dating him was out of the question.
Being this close to him meant that you’d heard and seen enough things over the past two years that you came to the conclusion that you’d be better off as friends. Besides, you had your eyes set on someone else, a certain co-worker that made your work life so much more enjoyable, but also so much harder.
Lee Seokmin.
The first time you saw him was about four days into your traineeship. He’d been on leave for a few days, but during his absence, you’d already heard enough about him to make you wonder what kind of person he was.
According to your seniors, he was considered one of the department’s best assets. Despite the fact that he’d only started working at XTREMEGEAR a year prior to your arrival, he’d left such a good impression on the higher ups that he got promoted to project leader after only seven months on the job.
Initially, it had confused you that literally no one had a bad word to say about him – even the ones that were his seniors. But everything made sense as soon as Seokmin walked into the meeting room that morning.
He was a natural. The way he carried himself, the way he talked, the way he treated his co-workers, everything about him just screamed employee of the month in the most positive sense.
And that was only half of it. In your eyes, the man was a literal god, carved out just like one of those ancient Greek sculptures from back in the day – every detail carefully thought out and nothing out of place, just perfect.
His gorgeous smile alone had the ability to light up the darkest room, and in combination with those radiant eyes of his, you didn’t understand how anyone could ever be upset in his presence.
When he blessed you with that bright smile for the first time, you thought you were about to die on the spot from the way your heart had started to pound inside your chest. He’d been so sweet and flirty even, throwing you the occasional wink while explaining the ins and out of the project team and leaning over your shoulder as he showed you how to use the computer, all of it slowly driving you insane and making you think that you actually stood a chance with him.
But as the days passed, you saw him do it to another female co-worker, and another, which made you realize that that was just his personality. Seokmin was a natural flirt and he was completely oblivious to the impact of his actions.
It didn’t really help that he always looked like a sexy CEO from one of those K-drama’s, especially when he was in his element – the sleeves of his white dress shirt rolled up, providing you with a perfect view of the veins running all over his muscular arms. You may or may not have fantasized about tracing them with your fingers (and *cough* tongue) on multiple occasions.
And then his thighs. God...his thighs. They were no doubt your favorite part about him. Although most people wouldn’t necessarily describe Seokmin as a big guy, it was very obvious that he worked out – the man did not skip a single leg day.
Before coming to XTREMEGEAR, you never would have thought a pair of thighs could have this hold on you, but there was just something about Seokmin’s thighs that made you go absolutely feral. It was at the point now where the mere sight of his tight black dress pants clinging onto his beautiful toned upper legs was enough to have you dripping in your seat.
Soonyoung always liked to tease you about that one time you literally drooled onto your desk because you’d been so fixated on the man’s luscious thighs. At that time, Seokmin had sat himself down onto another colleague’s desk to have a chat about god knows what. And although the action in itself hadn’t been provocative at all, with the way his thighs had appeared even thicker and more fuckable than ever in that position, your thoughts started to drift to a not-so-innocent place – apparently you’d gotten so lost in your little fantasy world that you forgot to swallow your own saliva, much to Soonyoung’s amusement.
It surprised you again and again that one man could make you so horny for him all the damn time. You couldn’t even remember a day where you hadn’t left the office with a pair of soaked panties. And it was all because your mind constantly kept drifting to the man’s thighs and how good they would feel between your legs.
You’d honestly lost count of the number of scenarios you’d come up with that involved him ruining you in the filthiest possible ways. At the top was definitely the one where he’d drag you into the supply closet and force you to ride his godly thighs until they were drenched in your juices – and you nothing but a moaning mess for him to use however he pleased.
Was it wrong to fantasize about a co-worker like this? Hell yes. Did that stop you from doing so? Fuck no. Lee Seokmin was like a drug, your personal drug...and you needed your daily fix of him to stop yourself from going insane.
Despite some moments of weakness, you were usually pretty good at refraining yourself from completely succumbing to your desire when you were at the office. However, there had been that one time – definitely your lowest moment according to Soonyoung – where you had to excuse yourself to the bathroom just so you could make yourself cum.
The sight of Seokmin’s sweaty form exiting the company gym in a pair of shorts that did nothing to hide his delicious thighs had been too much for you so early in the morning. That, in combination with the killer smile he’d thrown your way while he wiped the sweat from his forehead, had pushed you to your fucking limit.
Just your luck, one of your female co-workers had entered the bathroom while you were mid-orgasm, two of your fingers deep inside your sopping cunt and your mind filled with thoughts of Seokmin wrecking you on his thighs.
It had taken everything in you not to moan out loud as your body shivered in delight, your walls tightly gripping onto your greedy digits and your legs nearly giving out at the overwhelming waves of pleasure – all while your co-worker was doing her business in the stall right beside yours.
Of course, Soonyoung had immediately caught on when you finally returned to your desk after that suspiciously long ‘bathroom break’. The way he’d smirked at you told you that you were never going to live this down. But you’d already accepted that the moment you gave into your urges.
Your best friend knew you like the back of his hand, so trying to hide anything from him was useless. He always managed to find out one way or another.
The way he was so in your business was annoying at times, but you also knew that without Soonyoung, you’d have been fired a long time ago. He kept you on your toes, reminded you about important deadlines and pulled you back to reality when you were trapped in one of your fantasies again.
You liked your job, you really did. But whenever Seokmin was around, which was basically every day, you seemed to forget everything else that mattered. It was like you were stuck in this never-ending cycle and it was only a matter of time before you would make a fool out of yourself.
Like on this damn company retreat.
Currently, you were stuck on a bus with about twenty of your colleagues, including Seokmin, who was sitting only a few seats away from you and Soonyoung.
It felt like you were back in high school all over again, but this time with a bunch of grown ass adults. The sounds coming from the colleagues sitting in the back of the relatively small bus strongly reminded you of the rowdy ‘cool’ kids who always annoyed the shit out of you, whereas the front of the bus was significantly quieter, with the occasional raising of voices or laughter interrupting the peaceful atmosphere.
You didn’t really understand why the higher-ups thought that it was a good idea to send the HR team to a sports and wellness retreat. The wellness part sounded good, but sports?
Yes, you were well aware that your company offered boot camps and developed outdoor gym and fitness equipment, but you’d chosen the HR department for a reason – it didn’t involve exercise.
Still, here you were, forced to participate in various activities that would end up with you drenched in sweat and looking less than classy.
That wasn’t even the worst, though. No. Lee fucking Seokmin would be there to see you looking like a damn mess and there was nothing you could do about it.
And then you hadn’t even thought about how you were going to deal with Seokmin in his workout clothes. If what you’d seen him wear at the company gym was anything to go by, then Soonyoung would probably have to arrange your funeral by the end of the trip.
Normally, you tended to avoid Seokmin when you felt yourself start to spiral a little too far down into your sexual fantasies - you didn’t need another ‘bathroom’ incident. And though it proved to be challenging at times when he was literally your team’s project leader, working at such a large company as XTREMEGEAR did have its advantages: the building was huge and there were many places for you to ‘hide’ without seeming too suspicious.
But this trip was going to make all of that practically impossible. The whole theme revolved around team building and doing everything together, so you couldn’t exactly skip out just because you couldn’t handle being around your hot co-worker. Plus, the last thing you needed was another reason for your boss to hate you.
And then those goddamn sleeping arrangements. When you first heard that you’d be sharing a big room with the rest of your female colleagues, you wanted to scream on the spot. You’d expected some form of sharing, but everyone together in a single room sounded like absolute hell.
Yejun, one of the seniors who’d helped organize the trip, had said that it would be “a great opportunity to bond with each other”, but all you could think about while she was talking was the fact that you wouldn’t have any privacy for three days and no way to cum without the risk of anyone catching you.
You honestly couldn’t give a shit about improving your lifestyle or some stupid team building activities, especially when you knew that at the end of this trip, all you’d be left with was stress, increased blood pressure and lots of frustration...sexual frustration to be precise.
Was it too late to fake an illness?
“What’s up with that face? If I didn’t know any better, I’d think you were constipated,” Soonyoung’s voice snapped you out of your thought bubble.
Laughter erupted from the front of the bus, drawing your attention away from your best friend before you could retort. Seokmin was joking around with one of your male co-workers, a big smile plastered onto his handsome face.
He’d exchanged his usual office attire with a casual one – an azure blue hoodie and some light gray sweats. Thank god for those sweats, because you didn’t think you could have handled those muscular thighs being on display when you hadn’t even arrived at your destination yet.
It wasn’t fair. He was the sole reason you were currently in the middle of an existential crisis whereas he was having the time of his life, totally oblivious to the effect he had on you.
“Soonyoung, I can’t do this,” you whined softly, shifting your gaze back to him.
“Yes, you can. Remember the breathing exercises? Just do this. In...and out...in...and out,” Soonyoung responded, followed by a demonstration of the video he’d found online and sent to you a day ago.
“Shut up! This is not a fucking joke,” you hissed as you flicked the side of his head.
“Ow!” he exclaimed rather loudly, gaining the attention of several of your co-workers sitting in your vicinity. Fortunately, they were used to your bickering and antics, so they were quick to return to their own conversations. “You know, for someone who wants to keep things on the down-low, you sure know how to attract a crowd,” your best friend grumbled as he rubbed his now sore temple.
“Then you might want to cut the crap and help me.”
“Didn't I tell you to come up with a game plan before today?”
“Yes? But nothing is going to prepare me for this...him,” you sighed, leaning into Soonyoung so that you could sneak another peek at the reason for your suffering.
The pair of black-rimmed glasses resting on his nose was something new, only making him that much more mouthwatering – and okay, you wished that he hadn’t decided to make this fashion move at a time when you needed to keep your thirst under control, but you weren’t complaining.
“We could always go back to the breathing exercises,” Soonyoung responded, causing you to lean back into your seat.
“That video was meant for pregnant women and I’m not pregnant,” you emphasized, wondering if he’d gone crazy – well, crazier than he already was.
The man beside you wiggled his eyebrows suggestively. “You might be by the end of this trip.”
“You ar- No.” You shook your head while turning your body towards the window. “I’m not talking to you anymore.”
“Oh come on, Y/N,” he begged, pulling at your arm, but you refused to budge. “Okay, here. How about this? Any time you feel like it gets too much or want me to rescue you, just throw me a subtle wink.”
You looked at him as if he’d grown two heads.
“Really? You know I can’t wink for shit, so how do you expect me to do that subtly?”
“Right. I forgot you kinda look like a psycho when you try to wink,” he chuckled, after which he tried to imitate your awful wink.
“Not. Helping,” you huffed, poking his stomach repeatedly, knowing full well that he was extremely ticklish there.
“Okay, okay,” he giggled and grabbed a hold of your hand to halt your tickle attack. “How about you tap your nose instead?” he suggested, using his free hand to demonstrate it to you.
With a nod, you leaned back in your seat, already feeling slightly more at ease now that there was some type of escape set in place. “I can do that.”
“Great. Now, I’ll help you get through these three days, so just relax and don’t worry. I won’t leave your side for even a second.”
“You promise?”
“Promise.”
As soon as you’d gotten off the bus, the sight that greeted you was a huge modern log cabin – if you could even call it that – with many large glass windows decorating its walls, making it easy for the light to penetrate the spacious inside. Surrounding the cabin was a vast verdant forest, the vibrant colors of the trees and other greenery emanating a sense of peace and calmness that you hadn’t experienced in a very long time.
At first glance, you noted that it was much smaller than you’d expected from a retreat, but to be honest, you hadn’t really known what to expect from a sports and wellness retreat that was located in the forest.
The inside of the cabin was rather intimate and had a homey feeling to it – there was a huge and bright entrance hall that led into the living room, with a cozy fireplace that spread a pleasant warmth throughout the entire cabin.
After dropping off your luggage in your designated rooms and taking some time to freshen up – you were still salty about having to share with eight female colleagues, but whatever – the owner, Kim Minji, had been kind enough to give you a tour of the entire retreat.
You’d learned that there was a small indoor gym with some equipment and a separate space for group activities such as yoga, an indoor pool and a jacuzzi, both of which had you imagining what a half-naked Seokmin would look like – mouthwatering, no doubt. Aside from that, located right next to the forest, was a large open field that could be used for outdoor sports and lastly, there were three small outdoor sauna cabins, each a different type for you to try out.
Despite being skeptical and anxious about this whole trip, at least you were glad to know that your co-workers had managed to find a place that would allow you to properly enjoy yourselves during the scheduled free time.
But you knew you shouldn’t have trusted a word coming out of Kwon Soonyoung’s mouth.
Because how the hell did you end up on kitchen duty with no one other than Lee Seokmin while your best friend, the one who said he wouldn’t leave your side, was nowhere to be found?
Except for your near-breakdown on the bus, everything about the trip had been going great until this exact moment.
As promised, Soonyoung had stuck by your side the whole time, making sure to keep you at a safe distance from Seokmin and grabbing your attention when he noticed your eyes lingering a little too long on the purple-haired man.
Even during the free time, it had been fairly easy to avoid the man. You and Soonyoung had done a little exploring around the cabin, deciding to leave the pool and the sauna for another time – the fact that Soonyoung had overheard Seokmin wanting to check out the pool with a bunch of your colleagues had definitely played a role in that.
But then Seojoon, the other senior that had helped organize this whole thing, had gathered you in the living room for the next item on the itinerary. Dread had taken over your body when he announced that several of you would be assigned to tonight’s dinner shift.
Why had no one informed you about this?
Apparently, Yejun had, but back then you’d been stressing about the sleeping arrangements, so everything had gone in one ear and out the other.
And of course, luck wasn’t on your side, which was why you were currently standing in the kitchen with five of your co-workers, one of them being Lee Seokmin.
Okay, so technically, Soonyoung hadn’t broken his promise to you, but that didn’t matter right now. You were freaking the fuck out.
“Hey, Y/N! Wanna help me with the pizza dough?” Fuck. Why was he talking to you?
“Me? I-I’m not sure if I’m the right person for that though. I probably should uh,” you looked around as you felt yourself starting to panic even more, looking for any excuse to say no, “help Yejun and Seojoon prep the toppings. There’s a lot left.” You pointed to the large bag of vegetables that still needed to be cut.
Your senior quickly shook her head after hearing your words.
“Don’t worry, Y/N. We got this. Hyunwoo and Mina are working on the sauce, so you can help Seokmin. That way we’re even pairs,” Yejun smiled.
“Sure.” You forced a smile in return, but at the same time, you were mentally cursing her for putting you in this stressful situation. If only she had any idea about the inner turmoil you were experiencing right now.
Reluctantly, you slowly made your way over to Seokmin, who was now watching you with an amused smile.
When you finally dared to take a good look at him, regret washed over you almost immediately. He looked so fucking good with his hair slightly messy and still a little wet, presumably from the shower he’d taken. The glasses he’d worn in the bus were now gone, just like his azure blue hoodie, which had been replaced by a beige oversized zip up hoodie that looked just as amazing on him.
All in all, he looked like a snack...and you wanted to eat him.
“Don’t be afraid. I don’t bite,” he teased, gently nudging your side after you’d come to a stop beside him. “Only if you want me to,” he mumbled, leaning in a little closer so that only you would be able to hear.
“What?” you squeaked, your eyes widening at the implication behind his words. Your whole body tensed up, completely frozen as you attempted to process what what you’d just heard – you felt ashamed to admit it, but his words had gone straight down to your pussy, your panties already feeling slightly sticky from the arousal that had seeped out.
Seokmin, who was totally unaware of what he’d just done, simply laughed at your expression and reached over to grab a big bowl. “Just kidding. Come on, loosen up a little. We’re not at work, so we’re allowed to have some fun.”
Your cheeks started to heat up in response. “Yeah,” you muttered, embarrassed that you’d already managed to make a fool out of yourself only a few hours into the trip. God, he probably thought you were super lame.
“Then let’s make some pizza dough,” Seokmin clapped his hands excitedly before offering the kitchen scale to you.
After taking a deep breath, you felt a little more confident and reached out to take it from him. “Sounds good,” you responded, trying to ignore the way your pussy was throbbing with need for the man.
Just calm down, Y/N. He’s completely covered, no bare thighs, no bare arms. What could go wrong?
And surprisingly, it was actually fine for a while. With your nerves and horny thoughts pushed aside for the time being, the both of you worked together to create several batches of dough while joking around with the other four co-workers that were doing their own little tasks.
The point where it all changed was when Seokmin started to roll out that damn pizza dough.
“Aish, I should have thought of this before,” he muttered, pulling your attention from the recipe that you’d looked up on your phone. “Could you maybe help me take it off?” He was looking at you expectantly now.
“T-Take off what?” you stuttered, feeling the nerves settle back into your body. This was so not going in the right direction.
“My hoodie, it’s getting dirty. And my hands are kinda preoccupied, but yours are still clean,” he answered, showing his dough-covered hands.
Fucking hell. “O-Okay,” you stammered, your hands shaking as you moved in closer. He probably thought that you weren’t moving fast enough, because suddenly he was right in front of you, only inches separating the two of you.
From this position, the faint scent of his perfume invaded your nostrils. He smelled so refreshing, slightly citrusy but with a little hint of honeylike sweetness, the combination of which instantly made you feel like you were floating on cloud nine. It was probably the closest you’d ever been to him and you understood why. Thinking straight was nearly impossible.
“Y/N?” Seokmin’s smooth voice pulled you back to reality.
“Yeah, sorry,” you cleared your throat softly, refusing to meet his eyes. If you did, you’d no doubt give yourself away. So instead, you moved your eyes to the zipper that was holding the whole thing together.
With slightly clammy and shaky hands, you grabbed a hold of the zipper, slowly tugging it down as it suddenly dawned on you that you were practically unwrapping your hot co-worker like a present – the thought had you unconsciously clench your thighs together, your pussy already throbbing again.
Seokmin chuckled, interrupting your train of dirty thoughts. “It’s not gonna break, you know?”
“Right,” you hummed, your trembling fingers tugging at it a little harder until you’d reached the end, revealing the white shirt he was wearing beneath it.
“Now could you…?” he asked, making a shrugging motion to indicate that he wanted the whole thing off.
You could only nod, still refusing to meet his eyes. The sooner you’d get this done, the sooner you’d be able to go back to the dough and forget about the pool of slick that was now starting to form in your panties.
Forcing yourself to push the hoodie off his shoulders, you struggled to hold back a whimper at the view that greeted you. He was wearing a goddamn sleeveless t-shirt and there was no way to go around those deliciously toned arms that you’d dreamed about so many times. The skin of his arms was so smooth and slightly tanned, which made it all the much harder to take your eyes off them – he was really living up to his god-like status.
It was absolute torture trying not to trace your fingers over those prominent veins when you were this close, but you tried to control yourself...you had to. The last thing you wanted was for Seokmin to think that you were some perv that couldn’t keep her hands to herself.
Your heart was pounding against your chest by the time you’d managed to take the whole thing off, the man in front of you leaving absolutely nothing to the imagination with his arms on full display.
“Thanks, Y/N. Much better,” he sighed, rolling his broad shoulders before resuming his work on the dough he’d been rolling out.
“No problem,” you croaked, quickly turning back to your own workspace before you could do anything else to embarrass yourself.
For the next ten minutes or so, the urge to watch Seokmin rolling out the pizza dough was big, so big that you kept on having to repeat the words don’t look over and over in your mind in an attempt to keep your nasty thoughts about the man beside you at bay. But that also meant that you were extremely distracted and very behind on your own pizza dough.
“Are you two hurrying up with that dough or what?” Mina suddenly called from the other side of the kitchen.
“We’re on it! But perfection takes time though,” Seokmin responded, pulling a few laughs out of your other co-workers.
“It better be or we’ll never live it down. The others are already complaining about being hungry,” Hyunwoo snickered from next to Mina.
“Don’t worry. It’ll be the best pizza they’ve ever had. Right, Y/N?” Seokmin asked from beside you.
“Uh, yeah,” you mumbled, a frown forming onto your face as you struggled to form the perfect pizza circle. Whereas Seokmin was a natural at this, you were a disaster. This was exactly the reason why you preferred to order pizza instead of making it from scratch.
“God dammit,” you cursed as you messed up once again. With the dough being too sticky, it immediately fell apart as soon as you tried to transfer it onto one of the metal pizza pans.
“Here, let me show you an easy trick.” Your breath hitched in your throat when Seokmin suddenly appeared right next to you, his bare arm pressed against your own as he grabbed the piece of dough that you’d been working with.
Anything that came out of his mouth after that was lost on you. All you could focus on was the way his arm felt against your own, flexing every time he used the muscles in his hand to knead the dough into a ball before rolling it into a perfect circle with the rolling pin.
You couldn’t help yourself. The need to admire him was bigger than the voice in your head that tried to convince you that ogling your co-worker with a room full of witnesses was a bad idea. That’s why, after making sure that your other colleagues were preoccupied, you dared to sneak a peek at Seokmin.
Your eyes took in everything they could, greedily trailing over his form and coming to a stop at his arms, which had become even more veiny due to the constant force he was using to roll out the dough. You were practically salivating at this point, completely lost in your own world as your attention was drawn to the most prominent vein on the arm closest to you – it started at his wrist and went all the way up his forearm, until it disappeared back into his golden skin.
If you would have moved your hand just slightly, you’d have been able to touch-
“Think you can do it yourself now?” Seokmin asked, completely catching you off guard with his sudden question.
Your eyes shot up to his, his dark brown orbs bright and sparkling as he waited for your response. Had he caught you checking him out? At least if he did, he didn’t really let it show.
Nodding your head quickly, you stammered out a “Y-Yes, thank you.”
He just hummed, a grin tugging at the corner of his lips as he made his way back to his spot, leaving you with your pile of dough and no recollection of what he’d just explained to you.
God dammit, you should have paid attention.
“I’m telling you, Soonyoung. I never want to do that again. It was torture being this close to him and having to act like a normal person who doesn’t want to jump his bones!”
While nearly everyone was setting up for the last activity of the day – the drinks – you’d informed Soonyoung about everything that had happened during your kitchen duty.
“But the question is, did you cream yourself?”
“Soonyoung…” you warned, threatening to flick his head again by raising your fingers up to his temple.
“What? Just checking!” he retorted, holding his hands up in defense. “But hey look, you survived with only a few embarrassing moments, so I call that a win.”
“I guess, but ugh,” you groaned, burying your face into your hands. “He must think I’m so lame. You should have seen me. I made a fucking fool out of myself.”
Soonyoung rolled his eyes at your statement. “Don’t be so dramatic. It probably wasn’t even that bad. Now get off your butt and let’s have some fun. It’s not everyday we get to enjoy free drinks like this!”
“You’re right,” you sighed, letting him pull you off the lawn chair you’d been sitting in. “Just don’t drink too much, because I know how you get and I need you tonight.”
The man slung an arm around your shoulder, a wide grin on his face as the both of you made your way back into the cabin. “I’ll try, but there are free drinks so no promises.”
“Oh boy,” you sighed, not having a very good feeling about this.
And of course, your feelings had been very valid.
After only one shot of tequila and two beers, Soonyoung had transformed into an emotional drunken mess, making him pretty much useless to you.
Your best friend was known for not being able to hold his liquor, so why did you expect it to be any different tonight? So much for him being your knight in shining armor.
Between being forced to take care of a drunk Soonyoung and having to watch Seokmin flirt with your female co-workers, your night was officially ruined.
From where you were sitting on the couch, you had a perfect view of Seokmin, who was being a little too friendly with Mina in your opinion. You hated how close he was standing to her, and how he kept shooting her that million-dollar smile every time she said something funny. And you definitely hated the way Mina was eating it all up, being all giggly and playing with her hair while seemingly moving closer and closer as the evening progressed – you could have sworn that you even saw her feel up his arm at some point.
Jealousy. That’s what you felt as you watched your two co-workers interact with each other. You knew that you had no right to feel like that, because Seokmin wasn’t yours to begin with. Still, you couldn’t help but wish that it was you in Mina’s spot, wanting to be the one on the receiving end of that gorgeous smile and those flirtatious eyes that made you want to throw yourself at him every single time.
Of course he’d never go for you, because what were you thinking? Mina was gorgeous and you were average at best, at least that’s how you would describe yourself. According to Soonyoung, however, you were “too hot for your own good and anyone would be lucky to have you”. But he was your best friend, so of course he would say that. Seokmin was out of your league and that was the cold hard truth.
In an attempt to get rid of the bitter taste in your mouth, you’d resorted to alcohol since that was the only thing available. You did several shots with Hyunwoo and Seojoon, followed by a couple of beers, opting to distract yourself by talking to them while simultaneously keeping an eye on Soonyoung, who was sprawled out on the couch for most of it.
Seokmin was still talking to Mina and two other female colleagues who must have joined at some point, but you found yourself slowly starting to care less and less as the familiar buzz of the shots and beers you had consumed settled in.
“Y/N, ’m thirsty. Gimme beer,” Soonyoung slurred from beside you, his hand awkwardly landing on your chest as he tried to get your attention.
“Ow, watch it!” you exclaimed, pushing his hand off your sore chest. “And I’m not giving you any more alcohol. Water is all you’re going to get.”
That pulled a little whine from your best friend, his lips forming into a pout. “Want beer,” he sniffed, now on the verge of crying.
Your eyes rolled in response. “Just stay put, drama queen. I’ll be right back with your water. Please keep an eye on him for me,” you told Hyunwoo, who offered you a thumbs up and a goofy grin as you scooted off the couch.
It was only when you stood up that you felt the effects of the alcohol really set in. Your head felt heavy and the room was slightly spinning as you tried to steady yourself. Those shots and beers had definitely done a number on your balance.
With some effort, you managed to get to the kitchen, but just as you were about to open the door, it bust wide open, followed by two male co-workers storming out with a bunch of beers in their arms, screaming about god knows what.
Because you hadn’t expected them to show up out of nowhere, you stumbled back in surprise, the action causing you to lose your balance.
Out of instinct, you reached for the nearest thing behind you, bracing yourself for the impact that surprisingly never came – a pair of strong arms wrapped around your waist from behind, preventing you from falling flat on your ass.
“Careful there. Wouldn’t want to hurt yourself on the first day, hmm?” Seokmin’s voice sounded in your left ear, his deep voice sending shivers down your spine. Wait, Seokmin? Hadn’t he just been standing on the other side of the room?
“Shit, sorry! I’m so clumsy,” you groaned, realizing that you had actually grabbed onto him in your panic – his. fucking. thigh.
Were you actually dreaming right now? Though the fabric of his sweats was separating your hand from his beefy thigh, it was enough to get you riled up, especially with the alcohol that was currently flowing through your system. It was so tempting to just...squeeze. And you almost did, but then Seokmin spoke up.
“You good, Y/N?”
You blinked a few times before quickly ripping away your hand. “Huh? Yeah, fine. Thanks,” you muttered, heat creeping up your cheeks once again when you realized his arms were still around your waist.
“You sure?” he asked as he gently pushed you back onto your feet before removing his arms.
“Yep! Gotta go take care of Soonyoung now, though. Thanks!”
And then you were gone, leaving him standing there as you made a beeline for the kitchen. Any longer in his presence and you would have combusted on the spot.
One thing was for sure, you concluded as you stuck your head in the fridge to cool yourself down. The feeling of his muscular thigh in your hand was going to haunt you for the rest of your life.
Team building games. What a fucking waste of time. A super-sized memory game? A game of tug-of-war? A three-legged race? It all sounded like a fucking nightmare.
Who the hell wanted to see a bunch of adults run around like that? You’d much rather try out one of the saunas or do some more exploring around the cabin with Soonyoung.
But it seemed like you were one of the few who wasn’t totally excited about the prospect of having to participate in a bunch of games for three long hours – well, apart from Soonyoung, who looked and felt like he’d been hit by a truck. That’s what he got for abandoning you...again.
This morning had been rough, both for Soonyoung and you. Whereas Soonyoung was suffering from a severe case of hangover, you had to deal with the aftermath of your little encounter with Seokmin.
You’d barely gotten any sleep, your mind going over every single thing that had happened that day, in particular your near fall. The way his strong arms had wrapped around your waist had you wanting to kick your legs in the air. He’d been so close to you, even closer than in the kitchen, and it had felt amazing to have him all pressed up against you. Not to mention those damn thighs. Now that you’d had a taste of what they’d felt like, you only wanted more. You were seriously contemplating faking another fall, just to recreate that scene.
At least today, luck seemed to be a little more on your side. You were fortuitous enough to not be paired up with Seokmin for any of the team building activities, but that didn’t mean that you were in the clear...not at all.
The sweats he’d worn yesterday had been replaced with a pair of black nylon shorts that hugged his tan legs in all the right places – in other words, it was going to be a long afternoon.
“Y/N, stop drooling,” Soonyoung warned, snapping his fingers in front of your face.
Seokmin and his other two team members were currently having a tug-of-war match with three of your other male co-workers. If you thought watching Seokmin flex his thighs during the three-legged race was torture, then this was on a whole different level you didn’t even know existed.
“I’m trying, but look at him. I don’t know where to fucking look. The arms, the thighs or the fucking sweat dripping down his neck,” you stated before running your tongue over your bottom lip.
“Maybe don’t focus on him at all? Just a little tip?” your best friend suggested, waving his hand in front of your face.
Annoyed, you grabbed his hand, pulling it down since it was obstructing your view. “He’s like a magnet pulling me in. I can’t look away,” you said, just as Seokmin and the other two males started to cheer at having won the round.
“Fucking hell,” Soonyoung groaned as you suddenly started to squeeze the living shit out of his hand. “Are you trying to get my hand amputated or what?” he grumbled, trying to pry your fingers off.
“He’s really trying to kill me. Yah, you better start planning my funeral after today,” you whimpered, shifting uncomfortably in your seat, feeling your panties stick to your already slick folds.
The man in question was in the middle of wiping the sweat off his forehead. With a towel you ask? No. He’d lifted up his fucking shirt to wipe it away, giving you the perfect view of what he’d been hiding beneath that piece of fabric. And boy was he packing some mouthwatering abs that made you want to ride him into the next day. Your panties were absolutely soaked.
“You may have to plan mine if you keep squeezing. like. that,” Soonyoung huffed, finally managing to rip his hand free from your deadly grip.
“Would it be too obvious if I snuck away to...you know?” Honestly, another ‘bathroom incident’ didn’t sound so bad right now.
“First of all, gross. Second of all, you’re not leaving me alone with these fanatics.”
“Excuse me? Who are you to make demands like that? Where were you when I needed you yesterday?” you gawked, not believing the words that were coming out of his mouth.
“I know and I apologized for that, multiple times. What do you want me to do? Beg on my knees?”
“Well, if you insist,” you smirked.
“In your dreams,” he shook his head, your smirk disappearing right away. “Anyway, that’s not the point. Just control your damn self for a bit and look away,” Soonyoung scolded, snapping his fingers in front of your face again when your eyes had found their way back to Seokmin.
You threw your head back in frustration “Fine, fine. I’ll try.”
The memory game was luckily uneventful, mainly because it didn’t involve any running or rolling around on the grass. But despite there being no obvious physical component, it didn’t mean that your team was doing much better.
With Soonyoung on your team, winning was completely out of the question. Whereas you and Yejun were pretty good at finding pictures that matched, your best friend kept forgetting where everything was and messed up your score, causing your team to end up in last place when the time ran out. Not that you cared, but your senior was definitely not happy with the man.
Although the memory game offered a little distraction, the whole image of Seokmin’s thighs and abs during the first two games kept flashing through your mind. The whole thing had you worked the fuck up and it was getting harder and harder to ignore the burning desire building up in your abdomen.
Soonyoung had suggested for you to go on a run to clear your mind, which you’d shut down almost immediately. The prospect of more exercise after a day full of activities sounded awful.
But then you overheard your colleagues talking about changing into their swimwear, which led you to think about the scenario of running into a half-naked Seokmin. That quickly got you to reconsider Soonyoung’s suggestion, because you really needed to blow off some steam in a way that wouldn’t have you end up with your fingers in your pussy in a shared bathroom.
So, a run it was.
And apparently, you weren’t the only one thinking of doing exactly that.
“Y/N, wait up!” Not now.
You froze on the spot, your hands stilling mid-air seeing as you’d been about to plug your earbuds in.
“Seokmin?” you asked, watching as he jogged up to you, clad in a pair of shorts and another one of his sleeveless shirts that looked so good that it made you want to punch air.
“Mind if I join you?” Your heart skipped a beat at his question. He wanted to join you?
“On my run?”
“Yes,” he chuckled. “That is what you’re about to do, right?”
Slowly, you nodded your head. “Right.”
“Unless you’d rather go alone...”
You shook your head. “No! Uh- I mean, it’s fine,” you answered quickly, mentally cursing yourself for sounding so eager.
“Great. Let’s go then!” he smiled, jogging ahead before looking back when you still hadn’t moved. “You coming or what?”
“Coming!” you called, groaning internally at the thought of spending the next hour or so with the man you’d been thirsting after for so long.
So much for trying to free your thoughts from Lee Seokmin.
The two of you ran for quite some time, only speaking to each other when necessary – like when you needed to change directions. And it was actually sort of…pleasant?
With Seokmin running right behind you, the whole thing became a lot easier since you weren’t tempted to look at his face. Instead, you allowed yourself to admire the beautiful green scenery around you. The trees seemed to blur as you zoomed past them, twigs and leaves crunching beneath your feet with every step and sweet bird sounds echoing through the dense forest.
Of course, this perfect peaceful moment could only last for so long. The two of you were forced to take a water break when your legs got sore and your throat started to feel dry.
Seokmin was currently retying his shoelaces as you leaned against a big tree, trying to look at anything but him...his arms...his thighs. Spiraling into one of your delusions was not a good idea right now.
“You’ve been avoiding me.” His sudden statement startled you, your body immediately tensing up.
“No, I haven’t,” you countered, automatically shifting your gaze to the leaf-covered forest ground.
“You’re really not as discreet as you think you are, you know?”
“I don’t know what you’re talking about,” you shrugged, your eyes never straying from the floor beneath you as you tried to maintain your composure.
Seokmin chuckled in response, his voice echoing through the empty forest.
“Do I make you nervous, Y/N?” Yes.
“No,” you answered at the same time that you felt him move in closer.
“Then why is it that you can never seem to look me in the eyes...even now?”
Embarrassment flooded through your body. “That’s not- I don’t only do that with you.” You shook your head.
“You’re a bad liar, you know that? Just admit that I make you nervous,” he murmured, his sneaker-covered feet now coming into view, indicating that he was close...too close.
“You don’t.”
“No? Then why are you shaking?” he questioned, finally caging you in between the large tree and himself. The close proximity had you suck in a breath. The scent of his perfume mixed with the slight smell of sweat sent your mind into a frenzy.
“B-Because it’s cold,” you sputtered, immediately regretting the words as soon as they’d left your mouth. Even you knew how stupid that sounded, especially when you’d just run for almost 2km.
“Look at me, Y/N.” His demanding tone sent another wave of chills through your body.
“Seokmin, please,” you begged, not knowing how much more you could handle before he’d make you crumble. Again, where was Soonyoung when you needed him?
“Please what? All I’m asking is for you to look at me.”
“It’s too much,” you whimpered softly.
Your words were followed by a breathy laugh from the man in front of you. “Because I make you nervous?”
Finally giving in, you raised your head to meet his eyes, his pupils much darker than you remembered. “Yes. Happy now?”
“Wasn’t that hard, right?” he questioned.
“You seem to think you know everything already,” you huffed, trying to seem strong even though you were freaking out on the inside. He hadn’t moved from his position, so you were still trapped in between his arms.
“Because you make it too easy for me. You really think I haven’t noticed you ogling me all this time?” he smirked before continuing. “This trip was the perfect opportunity to confirm my theory.”
“Your what?” you gasped, feeling your soul leave your body. Was he trying to tell you that he’d been trying to test you? “So, yesterday...and today?”
Seokmin watched with an amused smile as you processed his words. “Like I said, you aren’t as discreet as you’d like to believe. You and me ending up together for kitchen duty was not a coincidence. I needed to see you respond to me with my own eyes.”
Kitchen duty...letting you take off his hoodie, those little comments and touches, and then on the field today...had all of it been on purpose? No way. He sure had you fooled with his acting.
Feeling flustered by his sudden ambush, you quickly shook your head. “It’s not what you think. I jus-”
You were cut off by his hand on your cheek, his thumb pressing against your bottom lip and his body pressing you even further into the tree.
“So, what you’re trying to tell me,” he started before his voice dropped an octave at his next words, “is that you don’t make yourself cum to the thought of me?” You pussy clenched in response. “And don’t lie to me, Y/N. I bet your pretty pussy is dripping right now.” His large hands dropped to your waist as he nudged your legs apart with his feet. “Tell me I’m wrong and I’ll stop.”
You were speechless, incapable of forming a single syllable. He was right and you knew that he knew that he was right, but the thought of admitting it out loud made you anxious.
“Nothing?” At the same time, Seokmin raised his right leg between your legs.
“Shit!” you moaned, throwing your head back against the large oak tree at the feeling of his thigh pressing right into your folds, with only the fabric of your black biker shorts and panties separating you from him. The squelching sounds that followed his action told Seokmin exactly what he needed to know.
“Tsk, look at that mess,” he taunted after he’d removed his leg, forcing you to look down at the wet spot that had formed on his dark blue shorts.
“Seokmin,” you whined, your cheeks now hotter than they’d ever felt before.
“How about we do something about that, hmm?” he suggested, putting his fingers underneath your chin to tilt your head. His eyes had darkened significantly – he looked at you as if he was about two seconds away from devouring you whole.
“Please,” you breathed, your voice dripping with desperation for the man despite the embarrassment you felt. The universe had decided that you deserved a chance with Lee Seokmin and you were not about to pass up the opportunity.
His lips were on yours as soon as you’d finished speaking, the taste of him sweet with a hint of saltiness from the sweat that had dripped down his face during the run. You were quick to match his pace, wrapping your arms around his neck to accept his eager tongue inside your mouth.
He was relentless as he devoured you, with his thigh back between your legs and his fingers wiggling underneath your tight sports top. Every single one of his touches sent little bolts of electricity through your body, lighting up a path of fire with the way his fingers danced skillfully across the bare skin of your waist.
You clutched onto his upper arms in an attempt to ground yourself when his fingers suddenly dug deep into your waist. The slight pain that resulted from his roughness pulled a small groan from you that was swallowed by the tongue-filled kiss you were engrossed in. That stinging sensation instantly faded into the background when he started to grind you down onto his flexed thigh, replacing it with a burning desire for more as your clit throbbed from the delicious friction.
“Such a juicy pussy, fucking hell,” Seokmin grunted, giving you some time to recover from his assault on your lips, switching his attention momentarily to help you speed up the movement of your hips. “You like getting off on my thigh that much?”
“Yes yes yes!” you mewled. “So much – don’t stop!” Your mind was an absolute mess as your pussy gushed with slick at every roll of your hips, each drag adding more arousal to Seokmin’s already soaked shorts.
Should anyone have run the same trail, they would have no doubt spotted the two of you doing less than holy things. But you could have cared less. It was just as hot as you’d imagined it and you’d be damned if you let a thought like that stop you.
“Who would have thought you were such a fucking pathetic little slut for my thighs? Look at you,” he sneered, pulling at the back of your head to make you look at him.
“Fuck fuck fuck!” you moaned, your eyes rolling to the back of your head at the feral look in his eyes. You’d imagined him wrecking and calling you the most filthiest names, but to actually hear him say that was like a dream come true. “G-Gon- cum,” you whimpered, digging your nails into the flesh of his sun-kissed arms to brace yourself.
A string of guttural moans left your lips as you finally exploded, bliss taking over your body like an uncontrollable wave that left you with no other choice but to succumb to it. Seokmin was there to catch you, holding you up between himself and the oak tree as he helped you come down from your high, mumbling a bunch of filth into your ear that caused your legs to tremble in excitement.
For a second after that, as your high started to die down, you were overcome with a sense of fear. You were afraid that when you opened your eyes, Seokmin would come back to reality and end this thing right then and there, afraid that you would never get a chance like this again.
But the hand that slowly wiggled into your shorts and panties completely obliterated those pessimistic thoughts, pulling you right back into that feeling of ecstasy as his fingers grazed your sensitive nub – the sound you let out at the action echoed through the trees around you.
“God, you feel even better like this, dripping all over my hand like a filthy whore,” Seokmin growled, teasingly dipping two of his fingers into your heat. You bucked your hips in response, your walls greedily clenching but finding nothing to satiate the ache in your pussy.
“Please...need it,” you whined, desperate for another release.
“What do you need, hmm?” he mused before his lips lightly trailed a path of open mouth kisses down your sweaty neck.
“Your fingers!” you gasped, your nails digging back into his arms as his fingertips circled around your entrance.
“Look at me,” he demanded again, his tone huskier and much more sensual this time. You complied, immediately getting trapped into those dark brown eyes that momentarily made you forget about where you were.
The corners of his lips curled into a smirk when he finally penetrated you with his long digits, allowing him to watch you fall apart from just that simple act. Your mind turned to complete mush when he started to pummel into your sopping cave with a vigor that you didn’t know existed. The obscene sounds it produced would have flustered you if it wasn’t for the fact that you were currently being fingered into the next day by your smoking hot co-worker.
And it wasn’t long before your lips found each other again, your tongues entangled in a passionate dance as Seokmin’s free hand roughly groped your breast over the sports bra you wore underneath your shirt. One of your hands had tangled into his hair while your other was gripping onto the arm that was worshiping your needy cunt – the feeling of those popping veins on his forearm caused you to clench around him just a little harder with your second orgasm approaching fast.
What the-
Your eyes fluttered open at the feeling of what felt like a water drop landing onto your forehead. Seokmin hadn’t seemed to notice as he continued battering his fingers against your gummy walls. Choosing to ignore the little distraction, you closed your eyes again to focus on the man making you feel good.
And it worked for a while, until you felt another droplet, and another. And suddenly it was pouring down. Not even the trees were able to protect the two of you from the cold and aggressive downpour that was already starting to penetrate your clothes.
“Fuck,” Seokmin hissed when he’d abruptly pulled away from your lips, a deep frown now adorning his face. “We need to go. Now.” He looked up at the sky. “This looks like it could become dangerous really fast.”
“B-But...,” you pouted, already feeling your climax ebb further and further away. You’d been so fucking close. Of course something had to ruin your perfect moment. It had all just seemed a little too good to be true.
“I’m not willing to risk our lives, Y/N. Come on.” Despite your protests, Seokmin retreated his fingers from your shorts and wiped them hastily on his shirt before reaching for your hand with the one that hadn’t just been knuckle-deep inside you.
He’d been right though. The sky was now dangerously dark and the faint rumbling sound told you that a storm was definitely not out of the question.
Before you knew it, the two of you were running back to the cabin as fast as you could, all while Seokmin’s hand never left yours. You were glad for that, because the truth was, the whole change in weather terrified you, especially with the thunder and lightning that seemed to get closer and closer by the sound of it.
The cabin was completely dark by the time you arrived, a stark contrast from the bright and sunny place you’d left behind. The two of you were completely drenched as you entered the large hall, bringing a trail of water with you that stained the mahogany floor.
“That was…” you panted, bending forward to lean your hands onto your knees while you tried to slow down your heart rate.
“Intense,” Seokmin finished your sentence.
“Yeah.” You let out a breathy laugh, which was followed by Seokmin’s own laugh. “Do you think the power went out?” you asked after a few seconds, straightening out your body again when you’d slightly calmed down.
“Seems like it,” Seokmin responded. It was so dark that you could barely see his face, even though he was standing right beside you.
And it was quiet, very quiet aside from the thunder roaring outside and the crackling and sputtering sounds coming from what you assumed was the fireplace in the living room. Where was everyone else?
“I guess I’ll try and see if the others are around,” you broke the silence, feeling a sudden need to escape from Seokmin as anxiety crept back into your body – your little escapade in the woods had really come to an end now.
But just as you were about to make your escape, the lights switched back on, followed by the sound of mixed voices quickly coming your way.
“Oh my god, what happened to you guys?!” Hyunwoo exclaimed as he rounded the corner together with Mina, Yejun, Seojoon and your best friend, whose face lit up at the sight of you. You also couldn’t help but catch the confused look on his face as he noticed Seokmin standing beside you.
“Went for a run but got caught up in the rain as you can see,” Seokmin answered for you both.
Only then you managed to get a proper look at him. He was a complete mess, with his hair clinging onto his face and his outfit completely ruined by the rain. You were no doubt in a similar state, if not worse.
“Are you okay? I was worried sick when I couldn’t reach you,” Soonyoung frowned after he’d jogged up to you and examined you for any injuries.
You nodded reassuringly. “I’m sorry. I put my phone on silent and forgot to check, but I’m fine. What happened here though?”
“The power went out because of the storm. Minji needed some help in the basement, so most of us went down to help her get it back on,” Seojoon explained before Soonyoung could open his mouth.
“And some of the others are still napping,” Mina added.
“They can sleep with all this noise?” Seokmin asked.
“Some people can sleep through anything, I guess,” Mina shrugged at the same time you noticed her eyes trail over Seokmin’s wet form, in particular the part where his shirt was now clinging onto his nicely defined abs. You felt a tingle of jealousy at the way she was ogling him, but you reminded yourself that you’d been the one riding his thigh and you’d been the one he’d fingered against a tree not too long ago. No one, not even her, could take that away from you.
“Come on, let’s get you out of these clothes. You might get hypothermia if you stay like this. Let’s go,” Soonyoung interrupted your thoughts.
“Yeah, let’s go,” you nodded, shooting Seokmin a brief glance. Your mood slightly soured as you noticed him talking to Mina, but Soonyoung didn’t give you much time to dwell on it because he was already dragging you away.
“You have a lot of explaining to do, missy.”
That night, you just couldn’t get yourself to fall asleep. Every time you closed your eyes, your mind kept going back to the moment you’d shared with Seokmin. No matter how hard you tried, you couldn’t seem to forget about the way his soft lips had moved against yours, the feeling of his smooth muscular arms underneath your hands and most importantly, the way his thigh had managed to give you one of the best orgasms of your life.
The things you’d give to do that again. It was pathetic really...how one man could have such a hold on you. But you couldn’t help yourself. You’d now had a proper taste of the drug that was Lee Seokmin and you only craved more and more with each second that passed.
Soonyoung had made it his mission to grill you about your little adventure with Seokmin as soon as your other co-workers were out of earshot. You, being the good friend you were, told him about everything that had happened in the woods, from the moment Seokmin had asked to join your run until the point where he’d made you cum on his thigh, followed by the awful downpour that explained how the two of you had ended up completely drenched in the entrance hall.
Your best friend had been in total shock at your admission – rightfully so – because how the fuck had he missed all the signals? At not a single point in time had the man given him any sort of indication that he was interested in you.
You couldn’t blame Soonyoung, because you were in the exact same boat, which is why you were currently in the kitchen, making your mind work overtime with the way you were overthinking every little thing that had happened so far.
“What are you thinking about?” a deep voice startled you out of your thoughts.
“Seokmin?” You squinted a little since the lights in the kitchen were still off. “Did you follow me here?”
He chuckled in response. “You really think I’d stay up all night just to see if you’d go into the kitchen for some water?”
“I guess not,” you mumbled, feeling stupid for even asking. But then again, you felt like anything was possible with this man.
“Do you mind?” he asked, pointing to the water bottle you were holding. Instead of waiting for your response, he immediately reached forward and twisted the cap off before taking a few sips from your water.
“You could have just grabbed one from the fridge, you know?” you pouted, but couldn’t help but admire the way his Adam’s apple moved every time he swallowed.
He grinned, leaning in closer as he placed the bottle on the counter beside you, his citrusy honeylike smell attacking your nostrils once again. “But sharing is more fun, isn’t it?” God, he was trying to kill you.
“I..uh, am gonna head back to bed,” you stammered, already feeling your nerves get the better of you again.
“Wait.” Seokmin was quick to cage you in between him and the wall located behind you, a sly smirk making its way onto his face. “Answer one question for me first.”
“About what?” you asked carefully, not liking the look on his face.
“The never have I ever game.”
—
“Okay okay! Never have I ever...hooked up with a co-worker,” Seojoon asked when it was his turn.
Your eyes nervously darted through the room as you waited for others to make the first move. Soonyoung, who you knew had had hookups with co-workers before, was quick to take a sip from his beer – being embarrassed was not in his vocabulary. So did Yejun, Hyunwoo and two of your other colleagues before your eyes fell on Seokmin, who slowly raised the cup to his mouth. You could feel your cheeks heat up in response as your mind flashed back to your heated moment in the forest.
“Yah, Lee Seokmin! Tell us right now who and where,” Seojoon demanded, making everyone focus their attention on the man in question.
“I don’t kiss and tell,” Seokmin grinned, after which you quickly averted your gaze before the two of you had the chance to meet eyes.
“Wah, who would have thought? Could it be someone in this room?” Hyunwoo teased, followed by several of the others joining him with their own theories.
While everyone was distracted with Seokmin, you hurriedly took a sip from your own drink, hoping that no one would notice. And you thought you got away with it, but then Sana, who was known for being nosy and very observing, started to screech your name, which turned everyone’s attention to you instead.
“Y/N?! You too?!”
“Who? And where?” Mina added.
“No comment,” you grumbled, feeling like you were seconds away from making a run for it as you felt everyone’s eyes bore into you.
Fortunately, Soonyoung was nice enough to notice your discomfort and interrupted the questioning by telling Hyunwoo to hurry and ask the next question. Not that his question was much better. If anything, it was even worse than the first one.
“Never have I ever...masturbated during work hours,” he smirked.
Feeling your body tense up at the question, you again waited for someone else to make the first move. However, this time, a lot less people drank from their cups. Two to be exact – Yejun and Sana. You debated whether you should drink too, but the alcohol that was already running through your system eventually convinced you to do it, surprising most of your co-workers.
“Y/N?!” Sana screeched again.
You nearly whined in annoyance at her reaction. “What? I wasn’t the only one who drank,” you huffed, mentally cursing yourself for being so honest.
“We need a story time, because this is making me curious,” Seojoon chuckled, rubbing his hands together in anticipation.
There was no way you were going to share that humiliating story, especially not when the reason for its existence was sitting right across from you.
“Isn’t the point of the game just drinking when you’ve done something?” you sighed, just wanting to move on to the next question already.
Hyunwoo shrugged. “It is, but we’re curious. Never would have expected that from you.”
Your eyebrows raised at his words. “What is that supposed to mean?”
“Yeah, you seem so...innocent,” Yejun chuckled.
“Oh, trust me, s-ah!” Soonyoung yelped as you jabbed your elbow into his side.
Your best friend was then met with your death glare, so he knew to shut up right then and there. This was definitely a moment where you needed Soonyoung to rescue you, not put you in a situation that would end up with you making a fool out of yourself in front of all your co-workers.
So, very subtly, you reached for your nose before lightly tapping it in the hope that he would notice. And oh, he sure did.
Your best friend peeked into your cup and snatched it out of your hand. “Would you look at that, Y/N. We can’t have empty cups around here. Let’s get you a refill!”
It was definitely not empty, but you couldn’t care less. You and Soonyoung were already out of your seats and rushing towards the kitchen before anyone had a chance to protest.
“Thanks,” you exhaled, glad to be out of that stressful situation.
“You know I got you. But...it was kinda funny to see you struggling a little.”
“Soonyoung,” you warned, not in the mood for his antics.
He made a gesture of zipping his mouth and throwing away the imaginary key. “I’ll shut up now.”
“Very wise.”
—
“The Hyunwoo question,” Seokmin continued, never losing that smirk. “Tell me, was it me you were thinking of?”
“Would you believe me if I said it wasn’t?”
“I would, but the fact that you’re clenching your thighs right now tells me that you’re probably lying,” he mumbled, placing one of his large hands onto the small of your back to move you just a tad bit closer to him.
You didn’t have a comeback for that, mainly because he was right. This man could read you like a book and you hated it. Were you really that easy to read or was he just good at it? Either way, it was getting more and more difficult to focus on that thought since Seokmin seemed to move in closer with every breath you released, his minty breath hitting your face and his alluring dark brown eyes fixated on your own.
It was intense, with the way he was staring right into your soul. And the urge to just throw yourself at him was strong, particularly when he lightly brushed his velvety lips over yours for just a brief moment.
“You’re cute, you know that?” He chuckled at the way you were desperately chasing after him when he’d moved back slightly.
“You can’t just tease me like that,” you huffed, fisting your hands into the fabric of his shirt to prevent him from moving any further away.
“But I like the way you respond to me.” One of his hands shimmied underneath your shirt and began to gently trace patterns onto your back, causing your heart to start beating faster. “You’re so...” you shivered at the feeling of his lips grazing along the side of your jaw before stopping right at your lips “reactive to my touch.”
Then before you knew it, your back was making contact with the cold hard wall as Seokmin’s cushiony lips collided with yours, moving with a gentle urgency that sent tingles all across your skin. Your mind reeled at the feeling of his wet tongue sliding past your lips, which caused a warmth to bloom in your chest that you hadn’t felt before with anyone else. Compared to your kiss in the woods, this one was much more intense and softer, and it made you absolutely melt into his touch.
You felt yourself get lost in the moment as his fingers danced up your spine, leaving a long trail of goosebumps in their wake before finally making contact with the underside of your breast. Your back arched off the wall, an airy moan escaping from your lips at the feeling of his cold fingertips on the sensitive skin of your soft mound. His touches were addictive, sending spike after spike of electricity through your veins, melting you into a pathetic puddle of need for the man you were so desperately clinging onto.
A sudden opening of the kitchen door had the both of you freeze on the spot, lips still very much attached. The position you were in kept you hidden for the time being – as long the interrupter didn’t turn on the lights or peaked behind the door.
Seokmin slowly pulled away, only to put his index finger against his lips to signal for you to be quiet. That proved to be difficult with your heart nearly beating out of your chest and your labored breathing that was the result of the kiss you’d shared. Still, you tried your best to hold your breath as the person rummaged through what sounded like the fridge.
The whole situation lasted only a few minutes, but it felt like eternity as you anxiously waited for the person to finish whatever they came here for. Meanwhile, Seokmin’s form was completely pressed against yours due to the way the door had opened. Any other situation and you would have been ecstatic at this proximity, but the fear of getting caught had completely ruined the mood for you.
It was only when the door finally closed that you felt comfortable enough to move from your position against the wall.
Seokmin ran a hand through his hair as he gave you some space to breathe. “Shit, that was close.”
“You could say that,” you gasped, sucking in a big gulp of air. “I think I almost peed myself.”
“That’s the risk of sneaking around in a house full of co-workers.”
“Yeah, well. I’d like to keep my sanity.” That earned a snicker from the man in front of you.
“I’ll give you a break for now. That was enough excitement for one evening, don’t you think?”
You nodded in response, butterflies erupting in your stomach at the prospect of doing this again.
His fingers gently caressed your cheek. “Sleep well, Y/N. I’ll see you tomorrow, yeah?”
“N-Night,” you whispered, the feeling of his touch still lingering even after he’d made his exit.
One of these days this man was going to be the death of you.
“Do I look okay?” you asked Soonyoung, gesturing to the black matching set of leggings and sports bra you’d decided to wear for the yoga and meditation session.
Your best friend, who was dressed in a pair of black shorts and a white oversized t-shirt, raised his eyebrows questioningly as he looked you over. “Why wouldn’t you?”
“Well, I don’t know? Maybe because I’m going to be in a bunch of weird poses?”
“Are you sure it’s not because you’re afraid Seokmin won’t be able to control himself?”
“Definitely not.”
“I still can’t believe you two had another kinky moment and almost got caught,” Soonyoung giggled. “You really have no idea who interrupted you?”
You shook your head. “No and it’s probably better that I don’t.”
“Everyone! Yoga session is about to start, so you better get down here!” Seojoon’s loud voice boomed through the large cabin.
Soonyoung reluctantly got up from the comfortable chair he’d been sitting in. “Come on. You know how big he is on participation and punctuality. Not in the mood to get my ass kicked today.”
“You’re right. He’s scary when he’s angry,” you shuddered, remembering that time he’d yelled at one of the new interns for skipping out on a company dinner without giving a valid reason.
Once you’d entered the yoga room, your focus immediately drifted from Soonyoung to Seokmin, who’d once again chosen violence – he’d gone for another white sleeveless shirt, paired with some dark green shorts that accentuated his robust legs in the best way possible.
He shot you a sneaky wink when your eyes met his, holding your gaze for a few seconds before he turned around when Hyunwoo demanded his attention. The simple action had left you feeling more flustered than you’d expected, with heat spreading across your face and down your neck.
Was he actually trying to give you a heart attack? What if someone had caught that?
Fortunately, as far as you were aware, no one had seemed to notice. Soonyoung was still happily chatting away, sharing some ridiculous story about his cousin who’d attempted to boil pasta without water. You, however, were only half listening, too engrossed in your own thoughts, but he luckily didn’t seem to care much.
It wasn’t long before the instructor arrived and the class started, forcing you to focus on the task at hand. Now, it wasn’t your first time doing yoga, but it was definitely your first time doing yoga with Lee Seokmin in the room, and from where you were standing, you had a perfect view of the man’s gorgeous side profile.
The routine was fairly simple and nothing too challenging for a beginner. Most of the yoga poses you were able to do without needing much concentration, which was probably a good thing. Because almost all of them put emphasis on the thighs and to say that you were a little distracted was putting it lightly.
During the variations of the warrior pose and the chair pose, your eyes were glued to Seokmin’s thighs. No matter how loud that inner voice was screaming for you to look away, you just couldn’t bring yourself to do it. The position you were in allowed you to observe every little detail, from the way his thighs thickened every time he bent his knees to the way his muscles contracted each time he corrected his balance. Heat was pooling in your lower stomach by the time the instructor started with the floor exercises.
You thought that that would be slightly better, seeing as it wouldn’t involve as much thigh, but boy were you wrong. The bridge pose you were all currently in provided you with enough mental images that left you with a wanton desire and another ruined pair of panties.
Against your better judgment, you’d made the mistake of looking at Seokmin, who was in the process of alternating between raising and lowering his hips every few seconds or so. His movements were smooth and controlled, which made you wonder what it would feel like if he were to fuck you like that in that exact position.
“Remind you of something?” Soonyoung snickered from beside you, startling you out of your daydream.
“Huh?”
“Are you even listening?” he hissed after seeing your confused expression.
You rolled your eyes. “I am now.”
“Anyway...I was talking about the instructor.”
Only then you realized that all this time, your yoga instructor had been talking you through the pose with her encouraging but still calm voice.
“Relax your body and breath in…and out...in...and out.” It sounded an awful lot like the damn pregnancy video Soonyoung had shown you.
“I think you need to follow her advice, because you’re wilding again. Can’t have you soaking the whole floor,” your best friend teased.
“Oh my god, please shut up,” you chuckled – you would have slapped him if it weren’t for the fact that you were in an awkward position.
By the end of the class, you were in desperate need of a break. Not just from yoga, but from Seokmin’s thighs in particular.
“I’ll be right back. Just gonna get some water,” you told Soonyoung as you picked up your phone and your water bottle from the floor.
“Just hurry back. Oh! And get me a snack,” he called after you.
Ignoring both of his requests, you made your way into the kitchen and towards the sink, where you filled your empty bottle with some ice cold water.
“Y/N.” You swiftly turned around at the sound of Seokmin’s voice echoing through the empty kitchen, not having anticipated his presence.
“Come with me,” he motioned and grabbed onto your hand before pulling you towards the backdoor, not even waiting for your reply.
“Yah! Where are we going? Seokmin?” you squealed, having no choice but to keep up with his fast pace – it was either that or be dragged around.
“Seokmin,” you repeated when he still hadn’t answered you. Your mind was reeling at this point, bordering between excitement and nervousness as Seokmin led you into the forest behind the cabin, a totally different route from the one you’d taken on your run.
“W-Wait, the meditation is going to start soon and-”
Your words made him stop in his tracks and you would have bumped into him if you hadn’t made a last-minute change in your steps.
He turned around, his dark eyes boring into you. “Then tell me, would you rather do that or go with me?”
The answer to that was easy. Of course you’d rather go with him. But skipping the meditation session or arriving late would make your co-workers suspicious, and if only the two of you were missing, it would only be a matter of time before they would connect the dots.
Did he not care about that at all?
Your mouth opened and closed a few times, no words coming out as you tried to reason with yourself. Seokmin, who seemed to notice the inner conflict you were having, softened his gaze and gave your hand a light squeeze.
“Do you trust me?”
“Yes,” you stated with absolutely no hesitation.
“And you like me, right?”
“Yes.” If someone would have told you a year ago that you’d be admitting that to Seokmin, you would have straight-up laughed in their face. But here you were, telling him as if he wasn’t making you feel all weak in the knees.
“Then that’s settled,” he responded, shooting you that infamous bright smile of his.
Fuck that meditation session. Because who were you to say no to that smile? Besides, you wanted this – no, you needed this moment with him and you weren’t going to let your fear get the better of you. It didn’t stop you before, so why would you let it stop you now?
Something in your facial expressions must have given away exactly what you were thinking, because Seokmin was already moving again, leading you to god knows where. But this time, you didn’t protest. Instead, you eagerly followed in his footsteps, your worries completely forgotten, leaving only a feeling of exhilaration as you wondered what he had planned for the both of you.
After what felt like ages, he finally stopped at a small but beautiful open space that was surrounded by trees and other greenery.
“This should be good enough for what I have in mind,” Seokmin said, turning his body to face yours, your hand still firmly grasped in his.
“And what might that be?” you mused calmly, even though your body felt tight with anticipation.
“Wouldn’t you like to find out?” he teased as his lips curved into a smile that managed to seem both angelic and devilish at the same time.
Without even realizing it, Seokmin had moved in closer, his breath now lightly hitting your face as your faces were only inches apart – a scene that you were all too familiar with.
He looked at you expectantly, his eyes radiant and slightly mischievous, almost as if he was asking you to make the first move. Feeling more confident this time, you were happy to comply, closing the little bit of distance between the two of you to slide your lips against Seokmin’s inviting pillowy lips.
It started out slow, with Seokmin’s fingertips dancing lightly along your sides, but the kiss quickly deepened, turning into something more as both of your hands started to wander over each other’s bodies with an acute need.
You didn’t exactly know how you got there, but you suddenly found yourself perched in Seokmin’s lap on top of a large rock that had been conveniently placed in the clearing. Your lips were frantically moving against another as you tried to relieve yourself of some of the tension that had built up inside you. But it wasn’t enough – nowhere near enough, especially not when you could feel the outline of his dick pressing against your crotch. With a little encouragement from Seokmin’s hands on your ass, your hips automatically started to grind into his, creating a maddening friction that only made you desperate for more.
Your hands were moving on their own accord, hungrily tugging at the bottom of his shirt, which he was quick to discard. The sight you were greeted with pulled an unexpected groan out of you, because how was he so damn perfect?
As expected, his skin was smooth and toned, just like the rest of him. His well-defined abs were covered with a thin layer of sweat from the previous activity, which, combined with the little happy trail that disappeared into his shorts, only made you want all of him that much more.
“Enjoying yourself, hmm?” Seokmin interrupted .
You could only hum in agreement, not quite trusting your voice right now.
“It’s only fair I get something in return, don’t you think?” His large hands teasingly moved up your form, your body shuddering with excitement at the thought of being able to feel his fingers all over you.
You sucked in a sharp breath when he abruptly tugged down the zipper that was holding your sports bra together at the front, the piece of fabric now dangling helplessly off your shoulders.
“Fucking hell,” he breathed at the sight of your exposed breasts, your nipples rock hard from the slightly cool breeze that passed you momentarily. Seokmin was on you like white on rice, wasting absolutely no time as he wrapped his lips around one of your nipples.
“F-Fuck!” you couldn’t help but curse at the feeling of his hot and wet tongue sucking messily on your hardened bud. Your hips were desperately grinding against his once more, your hands having moved to grip onto his hard thighs as you leaned back to let him work your body.
It felt good – so good. But you wanted more. It was at the point where you needed him to see the effect he had on you, particularly the sticky mess in between your legs that was getting more and more uncontrollable with every second that passed.
If only your clothes weren’t in the way.
Seokmin seemed to think the exact same thing, because it wasn’t long after that that he released your spit-covered tit with a pop, followed by a demanding “strip naked” that made your pussy clench involuntarily.
He didn’t have to tell you twice. Within seconds, you’d quickly kicked off your shoes, tugged down your leggings and wrecked panties before adding your loosened sports bra to the pile on the forest floor.
Then he was pulling you back onto the rock, his fingers digging into your sides before he roughly planted you onto his thigh, his shorts having ridden up from the way you’d been grinding in his lap just a minute ago.
Your guttural moan resonated through the forest as soon as your slick cunt made contact with his bare thigh, your hands grasping onto his shoulders for dear life as you tried to hold it together. This was it. Paradise. You were sure of it. Many times you’d dreamed of this moment, but nothing could have prepared you for the real thing.
“What are you waiting for? Isn’t this what you wanted?” Seokmin then proceeded to flex the muscle you were sitting on, pulling a loud whimper from you that had you throw your head back.
“Yes! ‘s what I wanted,” you moaned, your breathing already heavy and irregular from that simple stimulation.
“Then ride it. Show me how you make yourself cum,” he said, wrapping one of his strong arms around your middle while his free hand hungrily kneaded the flesh of your trembling thigh, urging you to move.
So, you did exactly that. You slowly rolled your hips once to test the waters. It was a good thing that Seokmin was holding you up, because the pressure of your clit dragging across his muscular thigh and the feeling of your slick spreading all over the place was enough to make you crumble.
Pretty soon, you were humping his thigh as if it was your last day, pleasure spreading through your entire being as you tried to make yourself cum.
Seokmin’s hands were all over you, leaving nothing but destruction in their wake as they roughly squeezed your ass, your thighs and your breasts that jiggled with every movement of your hips. Your mind was an absolute mess as slick kept gushing out of your pulsing cunt, making it harder for you to keep your eyes open.
“Eyes on me, baby,” he grunted, fingers firmly grabbing onto your chin as he pulled your face back down.
You could only whine in response, which Seokmin saw as an opportunity to push his thumb past your lips. He released a deep groan at the sight of your lips wrapped around his digit.
“Look at you, shit. Dripping on my thigh like a needy little slut.”
“Fuck – Fuck!” you whimpered, releasing his thumb almost as soon as he’d started flexing his thigh again, your orgasm unexpectedly tearing through your body with only a few more rolls of your hips. All of your muscles tensed up, your back arching and legs shaking violently as you released on Seokmin’s thigh.
“You okay?” he asked after giving you a few seconds to recover.
“I’m great.” You released a breathless chuckle, peeking up at him through heavy eyelids, feeling slightly out of breath from the intense pleasure you’d just experienced.
“Good, because it’s my turn now,” he smirked, leaning forward to press a chaste kiss to your lips before moving you off his drenched thigh.
Was he finally going to fuck you?
Curiously, you watched as he scooted off the rock and turned around, which allowed you to check out his half naked form for just a brief moment. But it was enough to have you riled up again, with his shorts barely covering anything at this point and the outline of his hard dick very prominent through his tight shorts – you licked your lips in anticipation.
“Come here,” he motioned, his hands wrapping around your ankles. He was careful as he helped you scoot closer to the edge, not wanting to bust your skin open on the rough surface you were laying on.
“What are you- oh my god!” you squealed after he’d thrown your legs over his shoulders, not having expected him to dive right into your pussy. Your eyes automatically closed. “S-Seok – min!” you whined, one of your hands tangling into his purple locks to steady yourself.
Not being able to help it, your hips jerked at the feeling of his hot mouth on your cunt. You were still extremely sensitive from your previous orgasm, but the slight pain of the overstimulation mixed with the pleasure from his tongue was surprisingly arousing, and it wasn’t long before your hips were moving in rhythm with Seokmin’s mouth.
With some effort, you forced your eyes open, a shudder ripping through your body from head to toe as you took in the view in front of you. Seokmin’s dark orbs were already looking at you, his tongue skillfully sliding through your folds and over your throbbing clit, all while applying exactly the right amount of pressure to your most sensitive spots.
“Right t-there...gonna make me cu-um,” you moaned when he pushed two of his fingers into your slick-covered hole, curling them up deliciously against your insides. All the while, his tongue had never stopped lapping at your swollen clit.
“Cum for me.” Seokmin’s voice had been slightly muffled due to the fact that he was still buried in your pussy, but you’d heard him loud and clear. That, plus the vibrations that his voice sent to your clit and the way he was staring at you while he was giving you the best head of your life, was enough to send you completely over the edge.
“Oh fuck!” you gasped, your hand tightening in his hair and your hips buckling erratically as the orgasm that had been building inside you reached its peak. It was unlike anything you’d felt before. You were cumming, but it was more than that...more intense. And there was so much arousal everywhere.
When Seokmin pulled back, you understood what had happened. His face was glistening, a few drops of your arousal dripping down his chin onto his chiseled abdomen.
Your cheeks burned with heat. “Did I just…?”
“Squirt? Fuck yes,” he panted, using the back of his hand to wipe away whatever slick was on and around his lips before stepping in between your legs. “And it was fucking hot,” he continued, putting his hand behind your head to pull you in for a messy kiss – the taste of yourself on his lips caused you to groan into Seokmin’s mouth.
“Please. Need you inside,” you gasped, your nails clawing at his back when he’d moved his lips from your mouth to your neck, occasionally using his teeth to nip at your sensitive skin.
“Yeah? Think you can handle that?” he murmured, his fingers digging into your soft thighs.
“Yes! Seokmin, please...need you to fuck me hard,” you whimpered, not caring how desperate you sounded for him.
“Fuck, okay,” he breathed, quickly removing himself from your hold before taking a step back.
Biting on your lower lip, you watched as he pulled his shorts and underwear off, revealing his hard dick that was already leaking large beads of precum. He was close enough for you to reach, so without thinking, you grasped onto his firm length. It felt hot and heavy against your palm, his precum now slowly trickling down towards the base.
You started to stroke him lightly, wanting to make him feel just as good as he’d made you feel...twice already. But Seokmin had other plans.
“Don’t.” He choked back a moan, his hand on your wrist after the second stroke, gently urging you to let go. “I’ll cum before I even get the chance to fuck you,” he continued after seeing your puzzled expression.
“Oh,” you whispered, biting your lip at the thought of making him come undone with just a few strokes of your hand.
A few seconds later, he’d forced you down onto your back once again, this time sliding his hands up your thighs until he was able to spread you out, your pussy still dripping from your prior activities.
“Still so wet after cumming twice already,” the man between your legs sighed, his gaze directed at the lower half of your body. “So greedy.” That was followed by a slap to your pussy. You yelped in surprise, even though the slight ache resulting from his roughness had you curling your toes in excitement.
“Seokmin, please. I can’t wait.” You were begging now, wrapping your legs around his waist to express how desperate you really were. “P-Please, I-”
Your breath hitched involuntarily at the feeling of his dick rubbing through your folds before finding your entrance. You forced your body muscles to relax at the intrusion that followed, but seeing as you were more than lubed up, Seokmin had no problem sliding every inch inside.
“Fuck...such a tight pussy,” he grunted when he’d completely bottomed out, the unfamiliar stretch of dick leaving you with a pleasant burn. Seokmin continued to take a deep breath as he tried to contain himself, keeping still for a few seconds to give you some time to get used to him.
But you didn’t need any of that. You just needed him to fuck you...hard...and fast, until you couldn’t walk anymore. You were convinced that you’d be able to take whatever he was going to give to you.
That’s why you groaned in frustration when he still hadn’t moved. “I’m not gonna break, you know? You can fuck me.” This was followed by you clenching down hard, which earned you a strangled moan from Seokmin, who was quick to jump into action after that.
“As you wish,” he smirked.
Any control you thought you had was gone after that stunt you pulled. He moved back slightly, just enough so that the tip was still inside you, before slamming his full length back into you. Your eyes nearly bulged out of your sockets at the force, your back arching off the stone as you gasped for breath. But Seokmin wasn’t planning to go easy on you now. You’d given him the okay, so you were going to have to take it.
Within seconds, he’d found a steady rhythm, his fingers digging into the flesh of your thighs for support as his balls – now covered in your slick – slapped against your ass with every thrust.
You were on cloud nine, mind completely blank aside from the thoughts that revolved around Seokmin fucking the shit out of you in the middle of the woods.
Your fingers weakly clawed at his toned arms as your mind reeled at the feeling of Seokmin continuously slamming into your wet cunt, the head of his dick kissing the tip of your cervix every time he leaned forward.
“Are you close?” he asked, his breathing sounding irregular due to the force he was putting into his movements.
“C-Close,” you stuttered, not in the right state of mind to formulate anything more than that. Seokmin sped up his thrusts after that, fucking you even faster and harder as he kept hitting that right spot inside you.
“Where do you want my cum, baby?” Seokmin asked when his thrusts were getting sloppier and sloppier by the second.
“Inside m-me...want your cum so bad,” you mewled, feeling like you were about to lose it with how fast he was drilling into you.
“Fuck!” Seokmin’s hips stuttered momentarily at your words, but he quickly regained himself before he resumed his merciless rhythm, bringing you closer and closer to the edge every time he buried himself back into you.
You finally came for the third time with a loud cry of his name, your body shaking all over as a result of the intensity. Seokmin wasn’t far behind. He gave one final thrust before he stilled inside you, groaning loudly into your shoulder as his dick released big spurts of warm cum that had you feeling nice and full by the end of it.
“Holy shit,” he sighed when both of your highs had subsided.
“You could say that,” you giggled, trying to regain your breathing.
“We should definitely do that again.”
Your eyes widened in surprise at his statement. “Really?”
“Of course. Unless...you don’t want to? I don’t just do this with anyone, you know?” he grinned as he helped you down from the rock.
“Yes, yes! I would love that,” you smiled, the familiar butterflies in your stomach making their appearance again.
You really thought this day couldn’t be better. Well, that was until you’d both gotten dressed and you’d picked up your discarded phone off the floor to check the time.
Annoying Bestie 💖:
>> Y/N!! Where the fuck are you?!
Annoying Bestie 💖:
>> Are u seriously ditching me for some dick rn?!
Annoying Bestie 💖:
>> If ur not here within the next 10 mins ur gonna miss the meditation
Annoying Bestie 💖:
>> People are getting suspicious…
Annoying Bestie 💖:
>> Trying to cover, but there’s only so much I can do with both of u missing :’)
Annoying Bestie 💖:
>> They’re definitely connecting the dots...u and Mr. Thighs
Annoying Bestie 💖:
>> Just so u know, ur never gonna live this down
Annoying Bestie 💖:
>> I hate it here
Annoying Bestie 💖:
>> Hope the D is worth it cuz ur missing out on some bomb food
Annoying Bestie 💖:
>> U BETTER GET TF BACK IF U DON’T WANT US TO LEAVE YOUR ASS HERE
“Uh...I think we might be in a bit of trouble,” you grimaced as you read through the many messages Soonyoung had sent you over the hours you and Seokmin had been ‘occupied’.
“How much trouble are we talking?”
“As in, we might miss the bus if we don’t hurry the fuck up.”
“Well shit, let’s go!” Seokmin exclaimed, reaching for your hand to drag you along with him.
“Is this how it’s going to be every time? Me getting dragged around by you?” you complained.
He looked back just in time to see you nearly trip over your own feet. “You’ll get used to it soon enough,” he laughed.
Yeah, you guess you could get used to this.
© All right reserved — ourdawnishotterthanourday // Please do not repost or edit any of my works without my permission!! If you see any of my works outside of this Tumblr, pls report it to me asap. Thank you in advance!
AAAAND THAT'S A WRAP! This took me much much longer than I expected since it was originally supposed to be a small fic, but I couldn't help myself since I had too many ideas for the plot hehe... Hope you enjoyed it!
If you did, please consider reblogging/commenting/sending me an ask 🫶
☀ if you want to be added to my PERMANENT tag list for upcoming works (MAINLY NSFW, SO 18+), leave a comment below or send me an ask, but be sure to mention PERMANENT TAG LIST if you choose to send an ask! If you wish to be removed, also send me an ask!
⚠️ Please note that this is NOT the same tag list as the SEVENTEEN World one!
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#JiJis fics#fic: f*ck my thighs#seventeen smut#seventeen x reader#svt smut#dk smut#dk x reader#seokmin x reader#seventeen scenarios#seventeen fics#seventeen au#lee seokmin smut#svt au#seventeen x you#svt#seventeen#dk imagines#dk scenarios#dk fics#dk x you#dk fluff#seventeen imagines#seokmin fluff#seokmin smut#lee seokmin#lee dokyeom#svt dk#svt dokyeom#dk#svt seokmin
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Queen of Light, King of Darkness
Aka the space!Nurbanu x Feyd Rautha fic
Cw: murder, allusions to sex, manipulation, mentions of cannibalism
Feyd Rautha x oc/reader
Taglist: @beebeechaos @avidreader73 @dunefandomhub
Much like your mother before you, you did not lack boldness.
Your mother had captivated the Padishah Emperor even before his wife had died and cemented her place as favorite with the promise of a son ---and her wit and beauty heightened by her abilities, of course.
She would have succeeded if the Bene Gessrit had not meddled and made an example out of her. They claimed they had made her Shaddam Corrino’s concubine in the first place as a replacement for Anirul ---who was only of a middling rank as her daughters were--- and killed her so the emperor knew what would happen if he put a wrench into their centuries long breeding scheme.
Irulan was meant for Paul Atreidis and would birth the Messiah’s children who would inherit the throne, and you, Nurbanu, were meant for whoever the Sisterhood told your father to marry you off to.
But you have other plans.
You wanted the throne. You wanted revenge for your mother, and you knew there was only one way to acquire it.
Through him.
The Harkonnen heir who delights in cruelty and pain.
Feyd Rautha would be yours and the known universe as well.
You know you have caught his eye when he forgets who he is trying to impress and focuses on you and only you.
To the untrained eye, you wear gray and silver as you are hosted by the Baron in all his grotesque glory. You wore pink, an almost insulting color here where the black sun paints everything in stark shades of black and white.
They favored cool dark tones, black as the sun and white as marble are the most seen here. Some may be bold and wear blood red or a deep blue, but colors like those you wear are not welcome.
Not that they can say anything about it, you are the emperor’s daughter.
You purposely avoid him during the festivities, hurting his ego because for the first time, a woman isn’t falling over herself for his attention.
It’s a good game, him as the predator and you as his prey.
But he has never met a woman quite like you, and his usual strategy doesn’t work. He can not make you jealous, he cannot impress you with his cruelty nor his position, nor can he manage to get you close enough to seduce you.
And yet, when he gives up, he finds you in his bed drinking his hard liquor and his concubines asleep on the floor. They have their own quarters as a proper harem would, but this is intentional. This was done to show your superiority over any woman he’s been with or ever could be.
“Was Lady Margot as good as the Box?” You ask mockingly. You are laid back on his pillows, as if you owned it as if he was the one who needed permission to even be there.
“Do you mock me?” He will find a better use for your mouth.
“Merely teasing you, you did have me here waiting all night. I was about to wake your harpies to make my night worthwhile.” You were Bene Gessrit just as Lady Margot Fenring was. He had rather enjoyed his night, but she had only awoken his appetites.
He knows nothing would feel as good as fucking a princess on his own birthday. To paint your pale skin with his seed as dark as your hair, to breed a son into you and claim the golden lion throne through you.
Vladimir is a fine name for an emperor. Vladimir Feyd, Padishah Emperor of the Universe.
“You haven’t even touched me, and already you named our firstborn.” You continue to tease him, light brown eyes dark with lust as you sense all the things he wants to do to you tonight.
There are so many ways he could take you, so many ways he could make you pay for your impertinence. He strips himself as he approaches you like a hunter with his quarry.
“Are you always this insolent, your highness?” Feyd climbs in slowly, like a great feline ready to pounce, but he never does. The Na-Baron only positions himself atop you ready to fuck you into submission.
Fenring had been the one in control. This time, it would be him who’s in control.
“Only when a man has my interest.” He can taste your arrogance in your lips and tongue. A heady feel like fucking under the influence of the spice, something he can bet you know about.
And if you don’t, he will gladly show you.
“A husband could fix that.” Who better than he to be that man. Your own name already matches his own.
Queen of Light. King of Darkness.
"Prince Consort Feyd Rautha has a nice ring to it, don't you think?"
Even the Bene Gessrit couldn’t have ever stopped this from happening, he thinks as he begins to unravel you underneath him.
It's no surprise to anyone that you return to your father as the Na-Baroness Nurbanu and pregnant with his only grandson to ensure neither he nor the Bene Gessrit get any ideas of separating the two of you.
“The Bene Gessrit expect you to die and leave the path clear for their creation. They always intended to have their messiah rule the universe through my boring elder sister.” You suggest as the two of you rid yourselves of his dear uncle and elder brother.
The black blood on your pale skin does things to him. He had expected you to be all talk and have him do all the work.
You had used your teachings to have both men kill each other and make him the undisputed Baron Harkonnen. Neither man could stop as your Voice commanded them to fight to the death, and Rabban took his own life once your manipulation of his body loosened.
He loved his uncle, even cared a little for his useless brother, but he loved power more. One day, he may even love you and you him.
“What does my baronness suggest I do?” He never had a morning like this and enjoyed the violent spectacle as you fed him with your loving hands. He wants to fuck you here, on the ruined dining room where his darling pets will feast on fine Harkonnen meat.
“Throw the fight, ally yourself with him, and let me give you your heart’s desire without even lifting a finger.” His radiant queen answers caressing his lips you do not seem to tire of.
And because you have not led him wrong, he does as she suggested and kills the Emperor instead.
Feyd Rautha welcomes a son, the future Emperor Feyd Murad, while the Atreidis line ends with the so-called Kwisatz Haderach.
Blond and dark eyed, and completely out of the Bene Gessrit’s control.
Part 2: the last wolf of Lankiveil
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COMFORT. // GOJO.
Scenario: Today was a bad day for you. You couldn’t even get out of bed to take care of yourself. You need comfort. Gojo Satoru, your boyfriend, is eager to be that comfort for you.
Word Count: 4,072.
Content / Trigger Warnings: female reader (she/her), implied depression (?), bad mental health basically, not taking care of yourself, gojo basically comforts and takes care of you, lots of crying.
I think that's it! Please (kindly) let me know if I missed something.
Note: No, Coral Island is not out on Switch yet :’ ) I have it on PC and I thought it was on switch but it’s not. Do look out for it, though! Cute comfort farming game. This probably won’t be the last time you’ll see me writing about Gojo comforting, as I like to write things deep from the heart or what I face, y’know? Like I started this when I was having a sad day, so dfjkgdfklg and, I know I’m not the only one. Mental health is important!! Please always take care of yourselves. If thinking about Gojo comforting you helps with easing your mind & heart, then hell yeah.
I know technically this is SFW so minors could read, but my entire account is basically NSFW still and I don’t feel comfy. So….
MINORS AND AGELESS BLOGS, PLEASE DO NOT INTERACT!!!
“Baby?”
There’s a gentle knock on the bedroom door, the deep yet soft voice being muffled by it. You’re currently curled up in the king-size bed, pillows plumped up and eyes glancing from the Nintendo Switch screen to the door. Shame washes over you and you sink further beneath the blankets, voice timid.
“I’m in here.”
Satoru didn’t hear it, but he still pushed it open. He doesn’t want to be apart from you. Not when you’re like this. He could sense something wasn’t right in the morning, but you insisted he went to work and that you would be okay. Low energy, you said. You peek up at him, the hood of his hoodie that you’re wearing pulled right over your head, not wanting him to see your puffy eyes and dried-up tears on your cheeks. You haven’t left the bed unless it was to go to the toilet or get water. Really bad, you know that. You should have at least eaten something. Even if it’s just a banana or a bag of chips.
“Welcome home, ‘toru.” You say, voice a little raspy but still holding that sweetness that’s only reserved for Satoru. You feel too drained to greet him like you wish you could. That’s another sign to the white-haired male that it’s one of the low days. Thankfully, they are rare but, they still prompt him to be wrapped up in his concern. He drops his satchel at the side of the dresser before he walks over to the bed, unbuttoning the first few buttons of his white shirt. “Thank you, princess. I missed you all day.” He expresses, emphasising the ‘all’ in a sing-song voice that coaxes a smile to appear beneath the hoodie. Good. He’s a little relieved to see it.
Satoru settles on the bed beside you, arm wrapping around your body to pull you in close. He’s low enough on the bed to tuck his chin over your shoulder as you twist a little to adjust yourself for the position of the half embrace. His stunning blue eyes focus on the screen as you continue to play the switch, his long fingers mindlessly stroking along your shoulder. Satoru knows you refuse to pull the hoodie off just yet, so he won’t force you to. He knows that you have been crying and is desperate to comfort you but, he’s not about the ‘forceful’ ways like some may think he would be. Baby steps.
“Coral Island?” He asks, pressing a kiss to your shoulder and you hum, thumb on the analog stick moving around. It makes you happy that your boyfriend makes sure to remember the games you like. “You’ve made a lot of progress on your farm, baby. It looks cute.” He praises sweetly, keeping his voice soft so as to not disturb too much. You smile at his words, ignoring the way your hands start to tremble and your eyes sting. What did you do to deserve such an attentive and loving man as your boyfriend?
“Though, I’m still a little grumpy that you want to marry, what’s his face… Wakuu. I think I’m a lot cuter, they should put me in the game.” He whines lightheartedly and you can’t help but laugh. “Baby, I think you’d make the game crash from how desperate people would be to date you. You’re too pretty and you’re all mine.” You huff a little, mind lingering a little on the thought of others wanting Satoru. Why did he choose you? He could have anyone he wants in the world.
“I’d hack the game so I reject other players aside from you.” He insists, noticing the tremble in your voice. He looks down at the top of your head, wishing he could see through and know your thoughts. Well, he can usually guess right, at least. He’s pretty good at reading people. Especially you. Calmly, Satoru takes hold of the console and puts it on pause before setting it on his bedside table. You let him do it. “Th-That would be too much work, s-silly.” You stutter out as tears for what feels like the hundredth time spill down your cheeks.
He hums softly, tugging the hood off of your head slowly, giving you time to stop him. You didn’t. Your shoulders shake and you can barely process anything now as you cry; not even when he moves your body so you’re facing him and between his long legs. He pulls you in close enough so his hand can rest on the back of your head and you sob against his chest, apologies babbling out between the heavy cries and obnoxious sniffling. “Nothing is too much work when it involves you, Y/N. Let it out, hm? No more hiding from me. Just let it all out and let me be here for you.” He whispers, the other hand rubbing soothing circles against your back.
Your legs that were tucked beneath you, slide until you’re laying against him with your legs extending out next to his, face still buried against his toned chest, fingers curling into the shirt that is becoming wet with the continuous stream of your tears. Your chest hurts so much. The tightness lingers, even as you cry your heart out. No wonder it feels impossible to breathe. You swear you could feel each teardrop as it rolls down your cheeks. Gross. It’s so gross. Small hiccups escape as you struggle to breathe properly between your heavy sobs, feeling his hand stroking along your hair as he holds onto you so lovingly. You couldn’t help but feel guilty that he has to comfort you through this. You thought that after hours of festering in your misery, you’d pick yourself back up before he got home.
He shouldn’t have to do this. It’s not the first time that he has had to help you and you just feel so bad about it. Sure, it may not be common. It may not happen all the time. Not happen weekly or even monthly but, it must be so stressful to deal with. Mental health can be so exhausting and every time this creeps up on you; you just wish you were someone who stinks of positivity 24/7. Always smiling. No dull clouds in your life, so no chance to spread it to those you love. Satoru deserves better than you.
Satoru frankly doesn’t give a fuck about your opinion when it comes to that matter. It sounds harsh but, it’s true. In his eyes, you are exactly what he deserves because you are everything that he wants in a partner. He’ll tell you that as many times as you need to hear. It’s not exhausting to him. Not at all. Nothing about you exhausts him. Satoru does feel concern when these particular days blossom but, isn’t that normal? Lovers are meant to be there for one another. Through the good and the bad. No one is perfect and, he knows. He knows that you’ve had partners who would snap with anger the second you showed a glimpse of insecurities or sadness. They would tell you that you’re making them miserable for having a sad day every so often. That it’s all your fault and that you’re exhausting. Even though, truth be told; these days aren’t that often. It’s just being human. Some may experience it more than others but, Satoru doesn’t think it means they should be treated harshly. Maybe with more kindness.
Besides, anger and guilt-tripping always cause more bad days because you learned to try and bury it all. To never let it out. Then it just grows like a nasty virus in your system, slowly bringing you to the point of feeling overwhelmed and unable to contain it. It surprised him that you used to apologise profusely at the beginning of your relationship. You had bad relationships that just added to your insecurities and made you feel like complete shit. All you need is reassurance and comfort. It took some time at first but, Satoru thinks that you’ve ‘improved’ in the sense that you have fewer sad days because of feeling like a terrible partner. You have insecurities like everyone else but, you knew deep down of his love for you and felt reassured by it. Especially since Satoru never expressed anger towards you. Just patience and love. The white-haired male of course wishes that you never felt anything bad. It’s natural for a lover to want that for their other half but, he’s not going to curse those bad days and make you feel worse. Together, you’ll get through it. That’s how he sees it and if it takes time to slowly ease your mind into that direction; Satoru will go that way and hold your hand.
His large hand continues to stroke along your back, resting back against the various pillows and watches quietly as you sob heavily into his chest, heart quietly clenching at the sight. He wishes he could take the pain away completely. You feel as if your lungs now rattle from how hard you cry, tears both spilling down your clammy cheeks and soaking into his white shirt. Your fingers stay curled up in his shirt, face rubbing pitifully against his chest. It feels so warm and strong. One of the infinite reasons as to why you love this white-haired man. His strength never wavers when he embraces you. You always feel safe, even as you cry. Still, guilt naturally lingers for being a burden.
“I-I’m so sorry, Satoru..” You manage to whine out breathlessly, voice becoming high-pitched, tongue unintentionally licking up the salty tears that lingered on your chapped lips. You have been lacking in self-care today. Satoru hums thoughtfully, hand coming up to push the strands of white hair out of his crystal blue eyes. “Don’t apologise, Y/N. You haven’t done anything wrong. You know that these days will never be a burden to me.” He reassures, voice low and calm. It soothes your soul with ease. Sniffling, you decide to sit up between his spread legs, though one hand refusing to let go of his now wet shirt. Your head stays tilted downwards but it doesn’t stop your boyfriend from leaning in to scatter light kisses across your visage, not bothered by the tears. He knows it will prompt a smile to appear and that’s one baby step in the right direction. You do end up smiling very briefly as his soft tiers ghost against your cheeks, mildly amused by the quiet ‘mwahs’ he leaves with each kiss.
It’s funny, really. Before you met Satoru, during knowing Satoru and being his friend, even now as you’re in love with the tall male and dating him; people always painted him as a man who frankly does not fucking care about people or that he’s utterly oblivious. They see when he’s loud and playful. Yes, sometimes a little immature (deliberate) and cocky but; they refuse to see this side of him, even if it’s directly on a silver platter for them to be exposed to it. Though, you selfishly think of how happy you are to be the only one who gets to see the loving and romantic side of Satoru. Satoru cares. He cares so much for the ones around him. He’s subtle in changing his ways for certain people. Whether it’s to let someone else take the last seat or tiny praises laced in between playful advice. He can be serious or calm when the time calls for it.
You hate that people continue to paint him as a selfish man who thrives off of his own cockiness and talents. Satoru, your boyfriend — Is a human being created with all kinds of shades of colours and each colour deserves to be loved. Cherished. His hands caress along your bare thighs, head tilting as he inspects your face, thankful that you’re not trying to hide anymore. Not through a hoodie or burying against his chest. He does think it’s cute when you do that. He can’t deny it. You’re finally managing to calm down, the tears slowly stopping and not trailing down your cheeks any further. Did thinking about Satoru as a person calm you down once more? It’s not the first time. Ha… You really are lucky to have him. You watch as his lips already begin to curl to form a small grin. It’s infectious because you feel the corners of yours twitch and you have to press your lips firmly together to stop it from happening. Maybe it’s a punishment to yourself. You can’t smile completely yet.
“Look at you, my little love.” Satoru says, large hands coming up to tenderly cup your cheeks, thumbs a bit firm when they rub away the tears. “All out of tears now. It’s all thanks to me for being the best boyfriend with a magical touch, hm?” Satoru jokes lightly to coax that soft giggle out of you and his heart eases at the pretty sound. Your heart practically swells at the pet name he calls you. In the early days when Satoru learned that you’re weak when it comes to pet names, he instantly started to use them. It’s like he uses it as a weapon. Only sometimes. Jokingly. All the time it still feels natural and wrapped in love. You didn’t know that he’s discovered that he adores using them when it comes to you. Especially when your eyes light up in his direction.
“You are the best boyfriend..” You manage to say, voice strained from crying so much. Snot threatens to drip out and it must make you look so unattractive. He doesn’t care. You’ll always be pretty in his eyes. Satoru smiles warmly at your words, playfully shaking his head. “Alright, this is about you. So don’t try to put the focus on me and think this can just slip away… Unless you want it to. I won’t force it.” He sighs, plucking a tissue from the box on the bedside table. You can sense it. He might become a bit agitated if you don’t express your thoughts, even if he’ll politely agree to move on and clearly treat you lovingly… You can already understand why he’d be annoyed. Locking it all up isn’t healthy and he’s been encouraging you for so long to be open with him. He’s not like past lovers so don’t treat him as such. It is true. He’s nothing like them. He may not be perfect if he’d secretly become annoyed but, he’s human. Just like you. On trivial matters, he’d usually whine as his form of complaint but, this is no trivial matter. It’s serious to him; your wellbeing.
“I won’t hide anything from you, Satoru.” You promise, nose scrunching up a little as he wipes it before carelessly tossing the tissue towards the small bin. Naturally, it lands in. He’s Gojo Satoru, after all. You shift to sit cross-legged between his open legs, slightly apologetic that he has to spread his long legs so wide. Satoru isn’t bothered by it. You bring a sleeve up to wipe at your eyes, chewing on your bottom lip. How do you even speak? It feels like the words are lodged in your throat. “It’s just a bad mental day. There’s nothing really behind it. One of those days, I’m sorry..” You trail off and you glance up to see him looking intently at you, arms comfortably crossed against his chest. Satoru isn’t blocking you out and you know that. He tends to position himself like this when he’s listening.
Still, he’s waiting for that one thing. Even with his eyes clouded with warmth for you, you know what he wants to hear. The tiny bit of truth. “Bad mental day, but… I feel guilty. I wanted to hide this from you so I— So I wouldn’t be a burden. Wouldn’t make you tired of me and I’m scared! I’m scared that if... if the bad days happen more, you’ll..” You don’t want to say it out loud. It feels like a knife is lodged in your throat. It might come true.
“Leave you?” Satoru finishes your sentence of worry. Hearing it out loud brings on a wave of nausea and your head falls down, fingers gripping the sheets. The white-haired male’s heart aches to see you so sad and vulnerable. Terrified. Maybe a normal person would feel hurt and offended by their lover having such fears. Complain about their lover having no trust in them. Satoru knows to not see it like that after dating you for a long time. People have thoughts that they can’t control. They’re like intrusive little gremlins ready to happily feast on the brain. Again, what heals is comfort and giving that reassurance. He repeats that to himself as a reminder. To never doubt. Not that he ever would but, it’s better to be safe. Tears threaten to spill again as the guilt bubbles up inside of you for admitting the scary thought. You don’t want to lose Satoru. Not ever.
Satoru sighs softly. You sense it’s not an annoyed sigh. You're sure if you ask, your boyfriend would jokingly say he’s just exhaling air. “Why do you have to sit cross-legged? It makes it hard for me to cling!” Satoru whines, large hands reaching forward to encourage your legs to uncross before he tugs you forward, strong arms wrapping around you once more, gripping firmly as if to show he’s not leaving. You gently nuzzle his shoulder as he presses a kiss to the top of your head. “I’m never leaving you. You’re stuck with me for life. Y/N, it’s okay to have bad days. Whether multiple in a row or sporadically. I don’t care about— Well, I mean. I do care. I’ll always care. I just want you to try to remember that you’ll never be a burden. This is never a burden.” Satoru says, keeping his voice soft against your ear.
You pull back a little to look up at him and his hand comes up to cup your cheek, shifting his hand to smooth his fingers across your hair, keeping you in place. “I want to be here with you on your darkest days and so you’ll never be left alone there. As cheesy as it sounds, I’ll be that glimmer of light for you. Just like you are for me. You have no reason to ever feel guilty about moments like these.” He finishes with his arms draped around your figure. A small smile manages to appear, cheek squishing against his shoulder. It doesn’t take much talking from Satoru to bring you comfort. He always knows what to say.
You’re just glad he’s finally home from work. You’ve been feeling so lonely without him. Carefully, you nuzzle against his shoulder before pulling away to look up at him, meeting his crystal blue eyes. It’s then that you notice he still has his sunglasses on, pushed back against his fluffy white hair. You pinch the bridge of the glasses and slide them off to set aside on the bedside table, not wanting to ever block the pair of gorgeous eyes you get lost in daily. “I love you.” You say softly, tilting your head to press a kiss against his wrist as his large hand pauses against your hair.
You watch him slowly form a grin at hearing the words, hand coming down to gently cup your chin. Satoru admires you in silence for a while. Even with a puffy face from crying and lack of sleep, you’ll always look beautiful to him. All his, too. No one else can have you. “I love you, too.” He says, voice filled with loving warmth before he leans down to press a kiss to your lips, not bothered by how chapped they feel. He’ll never pass on the opportunity of kissing you. You both pull away from each other and you can’t help but slump against him, feeling exhausted. It’s funny how you slept through the day between crying sessions and you’re still so tired.
The sight practically kicks a certain side in Satoru to wake up and so he sits up, arms caging you in as he looks down at you between his legs. “Alright, princess. I know you haven’t eaten. How about we order in? Whatever you like. I don’t want to force anything on you but you have to eat, at least.” He says, hand reaching for his phone that’s tucked in his pocket. You puff your cheeks out and look at him. His eyebrows are furrowing out of concern and his lips pouting. It’s hard to say no to him and, well, he is right. Again. “Okay, ramen.” You say, planting a kiss on his cheek. Relief washes over the tall white-haired male, thumb rapid against the screen as he orders your preferred ramen, along with his and a few entrees before he places it down.
“Do you have some energy to shower?” He asks, pausing for a moment before his hands come up in defence, eyes comically wide. “Swear you don’t stink, princess. I just want to take care of you and usually showers make you feel better. If you’re too tired, you can share a shower with me?” He offers with a hopeful glint in his eye. Satoru knows he’s being a little selfish because he enjoys showers with you. You roll your eyes at your boyfriend quickly getting all defensive, somewhat endeared by the fact that he emphasises that you don’t stink. Only Satoru would do that. You really do love him. Every single fibre of his being. His entire existence.
With your heart swelled up with love, you dramatically throw your arms over his shoulder before wrapping them around his neck, smiling. “Only if you carry me. I’m a princess, right?” You giggle softly and instantly, Satoru plants a kiss on your lips. He really can’t resist you. “Typical princess behaviour. You’re lucky I’m such a simp.” He grunts out as he lifts you in his arms with ease, large hands cupping your ass cheeks to hold you up as you wrap your legs around him. You raise an eyebrow at hearing his words, amused to hear the older male use fangirl terms.
It’s the exact thought that prompts your realisation. You don’t feel sad anymore. Not currently, anyway. You look at his gorgeous visage as he carries you to the bathroom, not a single thought of worry about dropping you. Satoru is too strong to do that. You bite back a smile and cling tightly onto your boyfriend as you think to yourself that being around him is healing and good for your heart. You’re determined to do the same for him whenever he feels any sort of negative emotion. No matter what, you’ll love him hard and take care of him like he does for you.
“You’re choking me—“ He rasps out, face scrunching up dramatically before you loosen your arms and smile sheepishly. “Sorry.” You say with a quick peck to his lips. He happily accepts it. Satoru sets you down on the bathroom counter, one hand already unbuttoning his dress shirt to reveal his beautifully toned body. You watch as he adjusts the taps for the shower, seeking the level of warmth that you like and notices you watching him with a dreamy look and smirks in your direction. “What are you thinking, baby?” He asks, cocking his head to the side. You shrug innocently.
“Just that I love you and would do anything for you. Want to always take care of you and make you happy.” You find yourself blabbering out and eyes locking with his. His smirk fades into a smile, endeared by your words. It’s rather comforting to hear. To know that you are here for him just as he is here for you. Satoru extends his hand out for you to take. “You already do that and more. I love you, too. Come on, let’s undress and shower before our comfort food arrives.” He says, wiggling his long fingers to entice you to take hold. You simply smile before taking hold of his hand to pull yourself off of the counter.
Right. It is time to shower with the love of your life.
Life is really good when you have Gojo Satoru as your lover.
#fae's writing#fae; writing.#fae; satoru.#gojo x reader#gojo satoru x reader#satoru x reader#gojo x you#gojo satoru x you#satoru x you#jjk scenario#jjk writing#gojo scenario#gojo satoru#gojo#gojo writing#anime scenario#minors dni#jjk x reader#jjk x you#satoru gojo x reader#satoru gojo x you#female reader#reader insert#gojo x y/n#gojo satoru x y/n#satoru x y/n
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“Eds. What are you doing.”
Steve wasn’t really asking him. He could see very well what he was trying to do.
He was trying to hide an amused smile.
They’d moved into the apartment less than two hours ago and Eddie’s one singular task was to set up their bed so they could sleep in it tonight.
Steve figured that would be relatively easy.
He was clearly mistaken.
“I can feel you laughing. Silent laughing is still laughing.”
“Not laughing. Just wondering how long you’ve been trying to starfish the sheet onto the bed.”
Eddie was indeed starfished across their bed, arms and legs spread out with the fitted sheet wrapped around his hands and feet. He’d been trying this method for maybe 20 minutes after the last attempt of one corner at a time didn’t work.
“Too long. Help.”
Steve came over and put his hand on Eddie’s back, rubbing it up and down his spine.
“You could’ve just asked me for help. I didn’t think you could actually get this sheet on by yourself. It’s a king sized bed, baby.”
Eddie glared at him over his shoulder.
“I take it back. You sleep on the couch. I sleep right here on my unfitted sheet in my king sized bed.”
Steve laughed. He couldn’t help it. Eddie was so fucking cute when he had to do household chores. It wasn’t that he couldn’t either, he just liked to pretend he couldn’t so Steve would help him.
Steve was onto him, but he loved it.
Loved doing everything together, no matter what it was.
“C’mon. I’ll help. It’ll be easy if we both do it.”
“Nope. This is the bed now. We live like this.”
“What do you want me to do to get you up?”
This was all part of the game.
Eddie seemed to think about it for a moment and Steve couldn’t help the fond smile he was giving the back of Eddie’s overdramatic head.
“Two kisses and a back massage later. Non-negotiable.”
“How about one kiss now, one when we’re done, and I give you a back massage tomorrow night too?”
Eddie squinted at him, half his face still buried in the sheet below him.
“Why two massages?”
“Because I love you?”
“Can’t fool me, Harrington. What have you done?”
“I may have let Jonathan and Argyle off the hook for helping unpack tomorrow so we’ve got a long day on our own.”
“Why would you do that Steven?”
“Because they’ve helped enough Edward.”
They glared at each other for a moment before Eddie sighed and turned to hide his face back in the sheet.
“Fine.”
Steve smirked.
“What was that?”
“I said fine!”
Eddie got up, received his first kiss, and they got the sheet on the bed in less than five minutes.
Steve knew better than to say anything about how teamwork made the job easier or that he told him so.
Eddie got his second kiss and then stripped so he could immediately get in the shower.
“Baby, it’s only 7:00. We haven’t even had dinner.”
“Too tired. Too sore. Come rub my back.”
Steve rolled his eyes fondly.
“Fine. I’ll order pizza when we’re done.”
“This is why I love you.”
“Uh huh.”
“That and the amazing blowjob you’re gonna give me after the back massage.”
Eddie disappeared in the bathroom before Steve could respond, but he didn’t need to.
He’d give Eddie whatever he wanted.
#steddie#steve harrington#eddie munson#stranger things#headcanon#domestic fluff#okay last one#seriously I got other shit to write#this was just clearing out the cobwebs
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The Collector’s story is so sad to me because they really do try!!! They are putting in the effort to be better!!! They defy the other collectors’ policy of imprisonment and genocide, for the sake of the Titans! They go along with Philip’s plans, giving him the draining spell and a bunch of other magic! And they listen to King’s Owl House rules, they’re gradually adjusting their behavior according to his advice, respecting his boundaries, even letting him get away with Eda and Lilith!
He’s learning. He really is doing all he can to improve, he’s listening. But the Collector isn’t doing it fast enough, they haven’t figured it out quickly; So it feels like for the adults and everyone else around them, they don’t want to put in the effort to teach and rehabilitate this kid. That’s too long and arduous, it’s much easier to stick him in a prison and hide it, or even kill the kid.
The Collector invests so much good-faith effort into changing for people, but those around him? They don’t want to reciprocate the same effort to understand him in return, that’s how it feels. They demand so much but give nothing back, use the Collector. And would rather take the easy route of punishing the kid to make him shut up for their convenience, instead of really working to talk with him at his level, and explain how to get better. There’s this silent, genuine, hurt and confused question echoing from the Collector; “What did I do wrong?”
It really does feel like one big metaphor for neurodivergent kids, and children in general, who are seen as misbehaving troublemakers. And rather than taking the time to understand their perspectives, and communicate to them about the problem, adults would rather just hit them until they’re quiet.
Because it’s easier, more convenient that way, like sweeping dust under the rug. Even if it just makes this kid who IS willing to improve feel neglected, unappreciated; Allows their problems to fester untouched and unseen, until it boils over and explodes later in life. And suddenly adults are all shocked because He was such a quiet, obedient kid, who could’ve seen this coming?!
The Collector feels like the collective wrath of so many kids who were treated like inconveniences to deal with, rather than growing children who needed help and guidance. And boy is the Collector messy about it, because they’re tired of playing by other people’s rules and trying to appeal to them with good behavior, in exchange for compassion, because that clearly hasn’t worked out and never will.
They are every child who has asked Why about a rule, and instead of being treated like a person with an honest need to know, was just told Because I said so. They want to get it, but people just prefer them being blindly subservient; People don’t care what the Collector thinks, so why should he feel the same for their judgment? The kid is panicked when he insists King focus on the revision he made to the storybook, the lesson he learned, but he’s still being put away for what others wrote.
“You can trust me” is something Philip and King have both told them, and maybe that parallels how adults insist children follow their seemingly arbitrary rules even without knowing why, because “It’s the rules” and authority dictates all. So after struggling under that command, of course the Collector is eager to be the one wielding it this time, with his rules...
The rules of a game. The rules of behavior. Both are laws dictated for people to follow, with someone often deciding and being able to change them as they see fit, especially with childrens’ playground games. Life is a big game and the Collector wants to play his own, after all this time following others’ rules; His people’s, the Titans’, Philip’s, and finally King’s.
There’s a lot to be said about how we expected the Collector to have been someone who didn’t play by any rules, did whatever he pleased. But it might just be the opposite, the kid has never had true freedom, always subject and listening to what someone else tells them, because they’re in charge or it’s the moral thing to do. They’ve been imprisoned their whole life, literally even, and now their desire for agency has burst free.
The Collector wasn’t the god of chaos we thought they were, but now they will be and we’ve seen why; It’s not because there weren’t any rules for them, it’s because there were too many, and the more you tighten your grip, the more something slips free. Too much authority, too little, the kid needs a proper balance of contradictory lessons, like so many in this show...
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Little Thoughts
warning(s): suicidal thoughts, suicidal ideations, child neglect, child abuse, suicidal thoughts of a child, abuse, financial abuse, hurt/comfort(?), mentioned manipulation, casual talk about death/dying, pre-relationship, uncertain reactions (basically Jax nor you really know how to go about the situation), implied crush (both ways)
A/N: This was written for myself, read it or don't, I don't care. I just wanted validation and acceptance from somewhere, even if it's fictional...
“Do you ever just wish you were dead?”
Jax slowed his oncoming approach towards you, blinking in confusion. “What happened to, hi? Hello? How are you?” He heard you scoff and crossed his arms loosely in thought. Sure, he was used to hearing some pretty questionable things from you, but you’d never flat out ask him—or anyone else for that matter—if they wanted to be dead.
“Well?”
“Uh, can’t say I do. Sure, this place sucks but think of all the entertainment I’d miss out on if I was, ya know—” he swiped his thumb across his neck and made a noise, “—dead.”
“You’ve been here longer. Aren’t you tired?”
What was this? Morbid fifty questions?
“You doin’ alright there sugar?” Jax circled around you, allowing you to see him long before he approached you taking a seat beside you. “I know you usually say some pretty…intense shit, but this is a little too intense even for you.”
You shot him a blank stare. Huh, you did say some pretty out-of-pocket stuff when it came to the dark subject—but to ask him flat out if he ever wanted to just be dead? That was new, but it was a valid question in your mind.
How could they choose to suffer instead of just dying?
“This isn’t anything new… I’m not like you guys. I haven’t been here for years on end gradually going mad.”
“Hey, rude. I’m not nearly as bonkers as Rags or King-face.”
He got a playful eye roll from you and that was more than enough of a win for his little joke. Sure it was a serious topic but he didn’t do so well during talks like this.
“I’ve always been like this… for as long as I can remember, as a child I thought it’d just be better if I was dead. That way my family could stop fighting, and I could stop being the rag doll in their arguments.”
As you spoke the grin that was glued to his face started to fall, slipping bit by bit until his lips ran flat. What child wants to kill themselves? He remembers his childhood not being the greatest but he never thought about death, that’s for sure.
“We didn’t have a lot of money growing up, they’d spend it on unnecessary stuff and worry about food and bills later until years of it caught up and put them in a bind.” Your gaze fell to your hands, fingers picking and peeling at the flesh. “Most would say I was a very spoiled kid, I always got toys and the holidays were jam-packed with even more unnecessary toys for a growing child to outgrow.”
He had a feeling he knew where this was going…
“But I didn’t want that, I didn’t want all those toys. Expensive or cheap, I never asked for any of them. If my eyes made contact with something and lingered just a second too long they’d buy it for me.” You sighed, looking up at Jax. “All I wanted was my family to give me the time of day, to play with me. To love me.”
“Fuck, I’m..” he hesitated, saying sorry felt pointless, that was ages ago and he wasn’t there. He wasn’t at fault but he couldn’t even imagine that—his own parents argued but they kept him out of it.
“It’s fine you don’t have anything to apologize for.”
He shuffled in place awkwardly, how are you supposed to respond to that? Luckily he doesn’t need to because you are already looking away and took a deep breath before continuing.
“It never got better, toys became electronics and games. Because of my family, I didn’t get to socialize growing up and I’d be quiet and withdrawn at school. The older I got the more vocal they started to get about me, even though they didn’t want me they kept me chained down and limited my ability to fight them.”
“What they lock ya up or somethin’?”
“They didn’t need to, I had no reason to leave the house. I didn’t have friends, we didn’t have stores or anything fun to do that wasn’t an hour’s drive away.” He hates the way you laugh so casually about it. “No, they’d limit any money I’d receive making sure I’d spend it instead of save it. I used to think it was their way of trying to make sure I wouldn’t run away, but even if I didn’t have savings that wouldn’t have stopped me from leaving with nothing but the clothes on my back.”
“Why didn’t ya?”
“I was a coward.”
Jax snorted and caught your attention. “You were a child, not a coward.”
“Whatever, pointless to think about it now. Did me fat lotta good in the end anyways, here I am trapped in this hell hole where the closest thing to death is abstracting.” A dry laugh left you at the irony. “I can’t even fucking off myself properly.”
The two of you simply sat in silence for a few minutes, neither of you seemingly aware of how to continue the conversation. There was no reason to give Jax the whole sob story that didn’t matter anyway, and he couldn’t think of a response.
Sure he wasn’t the greatest at times but he didn’t want you to just…die… but he wasn’t going to try and guilt trip you into living for him. Even if that outcome sounded far better than you dying, he could live with a guilty conscience—probably…
“You don’t have to worry about responding, I sort of just… dropped that all on you. It’s fine, it’s the past.”
“Still doesn’t change that ya still feel like ya should’ve died because your family sucks.” You shot him an unimpressed look and he shrugged. “I’m just sayin’, you were just a kid stuck with a shit family and should’ve been given help a lot sooner.”
“Gee, thanks—”
“I’m not done,” he used your name, no silly or insulting nicknames, “someone should’ve done something, I know people are stupid and think if they just look away it’ll be fine. But someone should’ve stepped in, it’s still abuse, it’s neglect.”
It went unspoken about how you clearly didn’t seek any form of therapy or help as you got older, he already felt like he was pushing it saying what he did.
“Look nothing I say is gonna make ya not wanna pop yourself, but it’s different now. Yeah, ya stuck here but you aren’t alone, and the others like ya.”
“What about you?”
“Me?” he blinked, you weren’t asking him if he…
“Do you like me?”
Jax coughed into his hand, casually turning himself to face the same direction as you. He refused to budge even when you turned yourself to face him, he was not gonna lose his cool.
“Ya alright, better than King-face and Rags that’s for sure.”
His answer pleased you enough to pull back but still face towards him. Occasionally, you’d see him peeking over to see if you were still looking at him until he finally kept his gaze forward.
“Thank you Jax.”
It felt wrong to accept your thanks, he didn’t do anything. But again you responded for him, as if knowing his plight.
“Thank you for sitting here with me, and listening… nobody’s ever listened to me before and not tried to justify what they did like I was the one at fault. You don’t need to feel like you have to have done something to be thanked.”
His shoulders shrugged before relaxing, his gaze that had glued itself to nothing finally turning to you. “Look just, promise me if you get those icky thoughts again you’ll come to me instead of stewing in them okay?” He saw you hesitate and cautiously reached out for your hand. “Promise me.”
You sighed. “Fine, I promise…” Ironically, you didn’t think you could trust anyone but Jax with this sort of information. Personal feelings aside.
“Good, now shut ya face and enjoy my presence and this beautiful moonlight night.” He threw his arm around you and pulled you closer, hand lingering at your side. He was going to make sure not to take advantage of this information, he wanted things to be genuine and not manipulated—as easy as it would be for him.
If the two of you were stuck here he wanted your feelings towards him, and vice versa to be genuine before taking the next step.
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Pure (Matt Murdock x Fem!Virgin!Reader)
Author’s Note: Well, everyone, I’ve strapped on my slut pants for this one. How I got this idea, I don’t know. All I know is that I had it, wrote it, needed to take a cold shower in the middle of writing it, and finished it. I think it’s even a little funnier after this last episode of She-Hulk, especially since I wrote it before I saw it. Is this self-serving? Yes. Is this also the perfect alternative fic option for me to include a gif of Bed Matt™️ when I wanted to but didn’t for another fic? Also yes. Enjoy, sluts (affectionate)! :)
Summary: After Matt overhears a conversation between you and Karen, his feelings that he holds for you already take on a new life, and his thoughts won’t rest until he sees them through.
Warnings: Fluff, mutual friends pining but neither of them know it until they know it, swearing, smut (virgin reader, nervous/excited reader, oral - f!receiving, fingering, sloppy kisses, P in V, praise kink! praise kink!, soft!dom!Matt (did I use that right?), Communication King Murdock, light corruption kink?, unprotected sex--if I’m gonna do a corruption kink, I might as well go all the way on it), cutesy cuteness because I just love seeing Matt happy.
Other Characters: Foggy Nelson and Karen Page
Word Count: 5,957
Matt’s not sure what word he’d use to describe you—one single term seems impossible to ascribe. Every time he tries to think of one, it never seems to capture your essence. You’re the furthest thing from selfish, and you only want to help those around you. You’re like light, a soothing breeze on a warm summer day.
One day, he’s talking with Father Lantom, finally having taken the old priest up on his offer of a latte at a chat. When the word “pure” falls from his lips, Matt immediately thinks of you—your kindness, your laugh, your optimism, and your heart. Everything about you is pure, and only enhances every last thing that you do.
But when Matt overhears you talking with Karen the following week, both Foggy and him up to their necks in casework, he comes to realize just how true that connotation is.
“So,” you hum, a lithe tone up-pitching your voice. “How’s everything going with you and Frank.”
Karen blushes and laughs, shaking her head as she files paperwork while you print. “We’re doing good. We went to Coney Island last night.”
“Cute. Did he win you a giant stuffed animal?”
“Actually, yeah. A giant frog.”
“That’s so sweet, I think I’m gonna get a cavity from the story. A full night just playing carnival games?”
“Well, we kind of cut it short. We went back to my place, and, well.”
It takes a second for it to click for you. “Oh.”
“C’mon, (Y/N)! You know how it is. That giddy excitement, especially when you haven’t had a chance to see one another in a long time. You get handsy with each other, he whispers something in your ear . . .”
You nervously clear your throat, and Matt can hear you nod your head as you work to organize the papers printing on the braille machine. Your heart is racing. “Y-Yeah,” you breathe. “Of course.”
Karen notices your shift in tone. “(Y/N), you have done it, haven’t you?”
“Well, um . . .”
“Oh, I didn’t mean it like that. I—,” she tries to backpedal.
“No, Kare, it’s fine. It’s just something I’ve done yet, that’s all.”
“Can I ask why?” she asks hesitantly.
Matt can hear you shrug.
“It’s a big step,” you say softly. “And I don’t know . . .”
“Is it like a religion thing, or—?”
“No.” You pause, unsure how to explain your mentality, mortified when your brain plays a ‘What if?’ situation with the idea and your crush on Matt. “If I’m not good at it or . . . I don’t know. It’s the idea that they could just leave the next day because they don’t like me anymore or because I wasn’t good enough. I’ve been rejected for less. I don’t want that to be added to the list of reasons why. To know that they’d stay is important for me. So far, none of them have or have wanted to.”
Matt feels his heart sink while Karen shuffles, unsure of what to say.
“I know the right guy is out there for you,” she settles on. “And I’m sure when you find him and when you’re ready, you’ll know, and it’ll be great. So great, you won’t be able to walk right.”
You let out a soft sigh; with your dating history, you’re not entirely convinced that her words are true, but you appreciate her sentiment. “A girl can only hope, right?”
He’s so caught up in what he just heard, Matt barely registers your footsteps moving towards his office. A gentle knock on his door brings him into the present and away from his thoughts.
“I’ve got those files for you,” you say. “I can put it in the case folder if you want and you can get to them when you’re ready.”
Matt clears his throat and straightens. “I can take them,” he says with a little tilt of his head and a smile. “Thanks.”
“No problem, Matt,” you say, placing them in his open hand before you walk back to your desk.
After overhearing your conversation, Matt can’t prevent his mind from wandering. He’s thought about maybe asking you out before, but he’s been worried that with everything he is, everything he does, he’d ruin your friendship. But now that he had overheard this conversation? Not only does he wonder what it’d be like to kiss you, but now to feel your body under his, completely at his mercy as he is the first person to explore you in the most intimate of ways, his hands being the only thing to give you support as he ruts into you, feeling you clench him tightly. Having you sit in his lap, bouncing up and down, rocking back and forth, your face buried in his neck as you moan and whine just for him. Bending you over his desk, leaning over you to kiss down your spine, marking up your flesh . . .
“Are you even paying attention to a word in saying?” Foggy says. Matt couldn’t tell God Himself the point at which his best friend and partner entered his office he’s so lost in thought.
“Sorry, no,” Matt says sheepishly.
“Who is it this time? That short lawyer with the curly hair heading the new GLK/H office in SoHo?”
He chuckles nervously and shakes his head. “No, not her.”
“Well, I expect the full details when you’re a little less horny.”
“Sure, Fog,” he appeases. “What’s up?”
“I have some things for the discovery on the Christiansen case. Turns out the McNeils were a little less honest than they lead us to believe . . .”
“Thanks for staying late,” Matt says, casually leaning against his office door frame, his shirt sleeves rolled up to his elbows, tie long gone somewhere in his office with a few buttons undone.
“No problem, Matt,” you smile, adjusting at your desk to turn and smile at him. “It’s what I’m here for.”
“You always do more than you’re ‘here for’, (Y/N).” He pauses and licks his lips. “You know how much I appreciate you, right? Everything that you do, both for your job here and what you do outside of work.”
“Thanks, Matty,” you say softly, his words making a warm feeling spread across your skin.
He leans away from the doorframe, slowly walking toward where you sit, his hands in his pockets. “You want to get out of here? We could grab a bite, if you want.” His fingers graze over his watch. “It’s late, and I can’t go starving my favorite employee.”
You laugh, the pads of your chair gliding across the floor as you stand up and move toward him. “Don’t let Foggy hear you say that.”
“Eh, he doesn’t count. We’re partners. You’ve stepped up in an incredibly huge way since Karen started at the Bulletin full-time. Nelson and Murdock would’ve sunk without you.”
A blush burns at your cheeks as you dip your head. “You’re giving me too much credit, Matt. It’s all you and Foggy.”
Matt lifts your chin with his finger, gently urging you to look at his face, to stare at his eyes behind his the red lenses of his glasses.
“You’re too good for everyone, you know that? Pure,” he says softly, his voice hitting a low register. “If people can’t recognize that, they don’t deserve you.”
You’re afraid that your words will catch in your throat while your heart races. “Are you saying that you deserve me?” you whisper.
“I’d love to think I do, but, you’re far too good for me. But I’d like to stick around—find that answer out for sure.” He takes a half step closer, feeling your body heat pour onto his frame. “Tell me to stop,” Matt breathes, his voice hitting a sinful timbre as his hot breath tickles your skin. “Just tell me to stop, and I will.”
“Matthew, I . . .” you whisper, your lashes fluttering as you try to keep your thoughts straight.
You shouldn’t. He’s your boss.
He’s your friend.
But you want him.
And he wants you. First and foremost, he wants you for who you are and how you make him feel.
You’ve never felt this before. You’ve never had your heart race so fast and your brain short circuit like this.
“Words, angel.”
Those two words make you lose all self control as you crash your lips to Matt’s, your arms flinging around his neck, your fingers running through his hair and tugging at the strands. Matt moans against your lips, pulling you impossibly close as he leans forward to meet your kisses. Your bodies spin around, pinning you between him and the wall as you exchange passionate embraces. The metal of Matt’s glasses creak between the force of your kisses. Matt’s tongue deftly slides into your mouth, needing to taste every inch of you. Your noses smush together as Matt tightens his grip on your waist, keeping your body in place as he pushes against you. This feeling of his hips against yours is enough to send goosebumps all over your body, parting your lips in a moan that allow him to capture your bottom lip between his, his teeth tugging at the flesh. You’re both breathing heavily as you stand in the office.
“I can’t tell you how long I’ve wanted to do that,” Matt admits, tucking some hair being your ear. His hand gently slides down to your neck, holding onto you softly before leaning forward to kiss you again. His tongue parts your lips once more, making the kiss a little sloppy and wet. His lips are as soft and plush as a new pillow, easily clouding your thoughts and judgement.
“Matt, wait,” you stop him, your hands on his chest to create some distance between the two of you, your chest suddenly feeling too small for your beating heart.
Oh no, he thinks. I fucked up, and I fucked up bad.
“(Y/N), listen, I’m sorry, I—,” he starts, but you halt him with some soft taps to his chest.
“No, Matt. It’s just . . . Well, I’ve never . . . I haven’t . . .” You dip your head, embarrassed at the moment, just like you have felt every time you’ve gotten to this point before. Unlike the other times, however, there is so much more weighing on this for you—this is Matt. “I don’t want to just be a fling for you, Matt. I can’t be a fling. I . . . I care about you too much.”
Matt hears your heart race faster, your entire being on the verge of becoming a complete and utter mess. You’re not sure at what point you started to have feelings for Matt, but you know that they’re there and they’re strong—the fact that he even reciprocates them in the slightest is exciting and terrifying. But at the same time, you know that Matt has quite a reputation, and you don’t want to be just another name on a long list of ladies.
Matt moves one of your hands directly above his heart, holding your other firmly in his. “You could never be a fling. You’re so much more to me than any relationship I’ve had before. It’s only you. And I want to show you just how much I mean that.”
Matt’s words wash over you like warm water from your shower head, His heart beats steadily with each word, the posture of your hand on his chest a silent, wonderful reassurance that he means everything he says. You capture his lips with yours, the embrace languid and tender but absolutely brimming with burning desire. He smiles down at you after your lips part, his nose brushing against yours. “Then I guess the question is if you can keep your hands to yourself long enough for us to make it back to my place.”
The door to his loft isn’t even closed before you bring your lips back to his, pulling him by his shirt collar and into your body, snaking you hands over his shoulders and onto the back of his neck when you feel you have him close enough. Matt’s hands slide down your body and under your thighs, lifting them up around his waist. You moan in delight into his mouth, his lips moving to your neck to nip, suck, and lick at the think skin that you are all too eagerly offering him. He tosses his glasses on the table by the door as he walks your bodies from the entryway to the bedroom. Matt’s attempt to gently place you down on the mattress is skewed by his own growing desire, turning the motion into more of a toss, your body bouncing up and down on the furniture.
Matt kneels at the edge of the bed, volleying kisses back and forth on the inside of your legs. Pushing up the fabric of your flowing skirt, he gains access to your thighs, becoming a little more aggressive with his ministrations, nibbling at the skin, licking down the little stings that accompany it. You let out breathy little sighs, each press of Matt’s lips against your skin making your heart race in a glorious fashion. Each kiss moves higher up your leg, spreading new branches of goosebumps and warmth all over.
That when you feel it—an overpowering wetness between you legs, trapped in your panties.
“Matt,” you breathe. Internally panicking that you’ve started your period far before you were supposed to, you wanted to push Matt away to save your embarrassment. But Matt knows exactly what really happened—it’s a sign of your enjoyment, your eagerness for him, your want. You really are so pure. Part of him feels guilty for making a move on you like this no matter how readily you accepted him, no matter how you both feel for one another, but the thought of being your first, being the one to tarnish that pristine virtue, to make you his, it makes him rock hard.
His hands snake up your thighs and push them wide open, letting your scent hit through his nose, permitting through your panties.
“Matt,” you try again, begging God above or whatever supreme being is there to spare you any further embarrassment.
“You smell so pretty for me, angel,” he groans, brushing his nose on your clothed core. “Can’t imagine how you taste.”
Matt presses soft kisses to your clothed core, pulling a whine from your lips.
“Your panties are so soft,” he mutters, nipping at you through the soft, thin fabric some more. “I bet your cunt is even softer.”
Dragging his lips up your panties, he grasps the hem of your underwear with his teeth, slowly pulling it down your hips and off your body. You watch the movement as Matt seductively works, and you’re shocked to find the inside of your panties void of any red color. Instead there is just a large damp spot in the middle and a long string of a clear something coming from you and to the fabric. Once your underwear is midway down your thighs, Matt uses his calloused fingers to slide them off of your body, letting the fabric pool on the floor between his bent legs and the bed.
“I want you to tell me how it feels,” Matt whispers, his hot breath fanning across your glistening folds as his nose brushes up against the top of your pubic mound, placing a little kiss there in anticipation. “I want to hear those pretty little sounds fall from your lips, okay?”
You don’t even get a proper chance to really comprehend or answer his question. Matt’s lips are on you in a second, pressing a soft, open kiss right on a special bundle of nerves that make you moan and your heart sharply skip a beat.
“You like that, sweetheart?” he smirks, gently grazing his hands over your exposed thighs. “That feel nice, hm?”
“Yes,” you breathe, looking down at him, the sight of his face between your legs sending you absolutely wild. “Do it again.”
A devilish smile grows on his lips before he complies to your request, this time adding light sucks to the way he wraps his plush lips around your clit. You can’t help the needy moans that fall out of your mouth, keening for more attention from his lips. You can feel Matt’s lips pull into a big smile as he continues to work his mouth. He pulls away for half of a second before licking a stripe up your folds. You whine, your back arching off of his mattress while your head tosses to the side. It’s like you’re not in control of your body while Matt’s lips are on you, twisting and turning into the pleasure. Matt has to use his forearm and one of his strong hands to pin your hips down to the mattress as he eats you out like a starved man. The combination of licks, sucks, and kisses turn you into a whimpering and moaning mess. When he lightens the embraces, you think you’re getting off easily. What you don’t expect is for a finger from Matt’s free hand to lightly brush up against your glistening folds. You suck in a hiss at the sensation, causing Matt to glance back up toward you while his finger continues to move up and down.
The sight is something glorious. His fluffy brown hair is disheveled and the tip of his nose, lips, and chin are covered in a marvelous slick from having his face buried between your legs. His honey hazel eyes are warm as they focus just to the right of you, making you feel safe as you cross a boundary you can never come back from.
“If you enjoyed that, angel, I think you’ll like what comes next,” Matt teases, his voice low with lust.
Dragging his fingers back down, you feel him at your opening. His fingers, absolutely covered in your arousal, gently push your lips open as he feels you; then, he carefully prods your entrance with his middle finger, pushing in slowly. Your eyes flutter shut and you moan as you feel him, slowly moving his finger in and out of you.
“Tell me how that feels, angel,” he urges, unable to stop himself from pressing a gentle kiss to your hipbone.
“G-good,” you exhale, closing your eyes to focus on the way that he manages to sneak his finger a little bit deeper in you each time.
“And do you like this better?” Matt punctuates his question with a curl of his finger, the tip of his digit scraping against your wrinkly walls and hitting something soft and spongey that draws an intense moan from you. A deep chuckle rolls from Matt’s lips and coats your warm body like honey. “Is that a yes, sweetheart? I need you to try and use your words for me.”
“Better,” you whine, writhing against his arm. “More.”
“More.” The way he coos my words back to you is somewhere between a question and amusement. Regardless of his exact tone, Matt carefully slides another finger in you. Rolling your head from one side to another, you let out a low groan, basking in how amazing the sensation feels as Matt manages to hit something so spongey and wonderful, increasing the pleasure with each ministration. You can’t but help the way that your toes curl and your back arches when he puts his mouth back on you. Your hand shoots towards his head, fingers tugging at his hair to keep him close. You’re an absolute mess as Matt works you, and you have no idea how or what to focus on more—his fingers or his mouth. What does begin to register, however, is a tightness in your tummy, a fluttering. You’re not exactly sure what’s going on, but you know that the longer that Matt works, the way that his touches set your body on fire, the more prominent the feeling gets.
You wine as he removes his fingers from you, his mouth kissing everywhere but where he had been thoroughly inspecting the real estate. Pushing your dress up and off your body, Matt wastes no time kissing as much of your gradually exposed skin as possible. Once the fabric is pushed over your head and off of your arms, Matt peppers kisses all over your collarbone and neck as he pulls your bra down and off, just avoiding your lips as he changes locations.
“You’re going so good, sweetheart,” he praises, his hands finding a home on your waist as he finally brings his lips to yours. “But that feeling you had? That good one in your tummy? I want to be in you when it finally lets go. Will you let me do that, angel?”
Matt barely has a chance to finish his sentence before you blurt “yes” and bring his mouth back on yours. The kiss is deep and needy, and he lets you undo his shirt and feel all over his sculpted figure. You don’t know what takes over you, but all you know is that you need Matt in every way, shape, and form possible. Matt finishes the work you started, wriggling off his white button down as he paints kisses all over your chest. His senses are in overdrive as he comes in contact with the supple skin of your breasts, his nose filling with a cocktail of your fruity body wash, your skin, and the thin sheen of sweat that has emerged on your body. While the noises you make as you move against his sheets is a beautiful symphony, the way your heart sings for him is the best thing he has heard in his entire life. Its rhythm is one of elation and tenderness—pure.
There’s that word again.
Even as you lay under Matt, completely at his mercy as the two of you engage in an activity that should pollute the very core of the term, but still manage to embody the fullest extent of the word.
As the thought crosses his mind as he brushes the tip of his nose up your skin to rejoin your lips, that’s when the thought comes to him.
You’re it for him.
“I thought I was the one who’s supposed to get flustered,” you chuckle breathily, your hand moving to caress his cheek.
A smile pulls at Matt’s lips, bringing those beautiful crinkles out for your enjoyment. “I just want to remember this,” he explains softly before pulling you in for a lusty kiss, a moan falling from his lips into you. Matt gives your swollen and tingly skin a few more tender kisses before leaning back on his knees, undoing his belt and ridding himself of all fabric below the waist.
You suck in a gasp when you see his cock out, hard, painfully taut, and leaking. All for you. Matt shifts his weight to his left, twisting his body to reach for the nightstand. You take his hand in both of yours, preventing him from going anywhere.
“Angel, I—,” he starts, but you give his hand a squeeze.
“Matt, I want this,” you keen as you try to calm your excited breathing. Everything feels right. “I want you.” You pull him back into you, and he lowers himself over your body so his hair tuft flops in front.
“Are you sure?” God above, is his voice so soft when he says that question. It’s brimmed with excitement, affection, tenderness, and nerves.
“I’m sure,” you confirm as his thumb gently strokes back and forth on your cheek. The pad of his digit roams to your bottom lip, letting him feel just how soft it is. You open your mouth slightly, and Matt can’t help but slide his finger in, letting you capture it and envelope it in warmth. Now, it’s Matt’s turn to moan as he feels your tongue swirl around his finger, letting his mind wander to what your mouth would be link around his cock.
That question will have to be answered another time.
Right now, he wants nothing more than to be buried as far as he can possibly get in you.
Pulling out his finger, he presses one more kiss to your lips before adjusting himself between your spread legs. You've gotten even wetter for him, if that's at all possible, and the smell of it drives him up a wall.
"I'm gonna go slow, okay?" he tells you. "I want to hear those beautiful nosies from you, angel, but you need to stop me if it hurts and you need some time. Can I hear you promise me that?"
"Promise," you whisper, your heart racing in an out of control pace. Matt takes one of your hands in his, lacing his fingers with yours in an effort to soothe you.
"Good girl," he coos. You feel a deep blush burn at your cheeks and your heart race as you squeeze his hand involuntarily. "You like that, huh? You like when I call you my good girl?" Just like earlier in the night, your brain short circuits when the name falls from his lips once more. "Oh, I think l'm gonna have fun with that," he teases, bringing your entwined hands to his lips for a kiss.
Carefully, Matt moves forward, and you can feel the head of his cock press against your opening. He pauses for a beat before he continues to press forward, making you a whimpering mess with each movement. With each gentle push into you, your pleasure grows.
"Wait," you squeak when the burning stretch becomes too much. "Hold on a second."
"That's my good girl," he praises. "Doing what I asked, using your words. Tell me when you're ready for more, angel."
As you take your time to adjust, Matt brings your wrist and forearm up to his lips, kissing, sucking, and nipping at the skin, licking down each mark he makes in an effort to soothe the sting.
"More," you swallow.
"Kisses, angel?" he smiles against your skin. "Or cock?"
"Cock," you breathe. "I want more."
Planting a kiss smack dab in the middle of your palm, Matt continues moving his hips forward slowly, letting out a low grunt as he pushes deeper in you.
"Oh, God, Matt," you moan, the sting of intrusion having turned into something only of pleasure. "Oh, so good.”
"So perfect, sweetheart," he sighs as his face controls in pleasure that matches your own. A low rumble falls from his chest when he bottoms out in you, somehow managing to fit all the way inside.
"Talk to me," he hums as he leans back over your body, kissing up the curve of your side and up and over your breasts, up the column of your neck, and finally to your lips.
"Move," you beg, tugging his bottom lip with your teeth before you press kisses up his jaw and to his ear. If that's what him pushing in felt like, you want it all. Over and over and over. "I-I need you to move."
A blissed-out smirk falls across Matt's lips before he kisses you hungrily, one hand resting on the side of your neck while the other weaves through your hair in the back of your head.
"You're doing such a good job taking my cock like that," he praises as he slowly beings to set a rhythm, the drag of his length against you unlike anything you have felt before. "Such a good girl for me, letting me spread you wide and take you. God, angel, you’re doing so good, taking me all the way like that, nice and deep.”
How Matt is forming coherent sentences is fully beyond you at this point. Maybe it’s because he’s done this before, maybe it solely something he’s doing to keep you calm as he pushes through his own pleasure.
“So tight, angel,” he grunts, his hands sliding up your thighs towards your hips. “Oh, you feel so good. Fuck.”
You moan and whimper with each one of Matt’s thrusts, and you yank him down on top of you, desperate to feel every last inch of him against you. He groans but quickly lets out a little chuckle, thrown off and endeared by your excitement as he cages your body below his.
“You like that, sweetheart? Feel good?”
“Y-Yes,” you moan, moving your hands along his incredibly soft skin. You paint a trail of kisses all along his shoulders, collarbones, and neck while he keeps on rocking into you. His hot breath tickles your skin as his beard brushes goosebumps all over your body while he tries to match you embraces. Matt whispers and grunts little praises into your skin, never faltering to let you know how good you’re doing for him.
“M-Matt,” you whine, your nails digging little crescents into his back. “S-Shit! Mmm!”
“Words,” he grunts, his ability for full sentences now starting to escape him.
“God, you’re so deep!” you cry, your eyes fluttered shut as you absorb the pleasure he gives you as your words being to slur together. “So big.”
Matt tunes into your body, listening to how the blood rushes through your veins down to where your bodies join together and your heart races. He knows you’re not going to last much longer.
“Angel,” he pants. “Angel, it’s okay.”
“Matt!” you cry, your voice curving up in pitch. You’re so close, he can taste it—and it drives him wild.
“I know, angel, I know. You’re gonna feel so g—fuck, that’s nice. So good for me.”
“Matt, I—.”
“‘M right here,” he assures with a kiss. “Right here. Let go for me, angel. Let me hear you.”
With a few more thrusts, an intense pleasure rips through your body, unlike anything you have felt before, and far better than what you’ve ever experienced. Your hips buck up to meet Matt’s while your legs latch onto his waist. Matt up above you is the only thing keeping you from thrashing around in euphoria. You hold onto him for dear life, your hands mussing his hair as he buries his face in your neck, moaning as he chases his own release and spills into you. He forces his hips to keep moving fast as he cums, desperate to make sure that your first orgasm is memorable, that the tremors ripple through your body long after it has past, even if it means the sensations verge on too much for him. Only once he feels you start to loosen up and your breathing begin to relax does he pull out, pressing kisses into your skin all the while his hands caress your shaking body. He hears your head roll to the side to face him as he lies down next to you.
“Matt,” you breathe, and he can hear the blissed out smile spreading across your face as you curl your body into his.
“You alright, angel?” he whispers, kissing your forehead.
“Amazing,” you sigh softly.
“I’m gonna go get some things to clean you up, okay? I’ll be right back.”
You hum a confirmation as Matt gives you another kiss, carefully rolling out of bed and through the loft. He returns quickly with a warm damp towel, some water, and a pack of grapes. Putting the glasses down on the nightstand, he sits on his knees, pressing gentle kisses into the skin of your stomach, hips, and thighs.
“Can you open your legs for me, sweetheart?” he asks softly.
“I don’t think I can do more,” you breathe dreamily.
Matt chuckles, absolutely beaming at your happy disposition in his bed. “We’ll get you there eventually, sweetheart. But I want to clean you up. I’m gonna move your knee, okay?”
You oblige with his request, a soft moan falling from your lips as you spread wide for him, the delightful soreness reminding you of how perfectly his body fit with yours. “That’s it,” he whispers as he helps gently guide your leg open. “That’s my girl.” Matt is careful with his wipes, sprinkling kisses here and there as little reassurances. He’s extra careful when he gets to your core, knowing all too well how sensitive you must be. When he’s finished, he tosses it to the side and leans up over you to kiss you.
“Can you sit up for me now and drink some water?” he whispers into your cheek before stamping another kiss to your skin.
You do as he asks without another word and he hands you the glass, a gentle arm around your shoulders as you hydrate. “Can I get you anything else, angel? Do you want a snack? I can give you a little massage, if you want.”
“I’m okay,” you tell him, your mind beginning to reorient itself as you snuggle into his body. “That was . . . I don’t even know.”
“I hope it was a good ‘I don’t even know’,” he smirks.
“The best ‘I don’t even know’,” you chuckle. “I, um . . .” You blush deeply before you mutter, “Thank you for being my first.”
Matt notices the skip in your heartbeat, the shy and scared tone of your voice, and the salty tears that threaten to spill down your cheeks.
You’re embarrassed—ashamed, even. Why?
Matt pushes your chin up with his thumb and forefinger, forcing you to look at his face.
“Thank you for giving me the honor. For trusting me,” he whispers, placing a light kiss on the apple of your cheek. “This is something important. Personal.”
“You don’t think . . . I mean, I . . .” you start, unsure of how to even form the question you were thinking.
“Not too many people are like you, (Y/N)—pure like you in everything that you do. I’m glad you were able to trust me with this.” Your wrap an arm around him and turn your face into his shoulder. “I wouldn’t have wanted to be anywhere else tonight with anyone else.” He kisses your temple. “Let me take you to dinner tomorrow,” he whispers in your hair. “Let me date you. Because I don’t want this to be it between us.”
That sentence makes you tilt your head up, amazed how he’s facing you with nothing but utter adoration. “I told you you weren’t a fling. I want the chance to show you how happy you make me, how you make me feel. Please?”
A bright smile pulls at your lips, a new wave of energy washing over you. You pull your body up, having your lips meet his, rolling on top of him. You gingerly straddle his hips with your legs, kissing him passionately as he reciprocates with just as much emotion.
“Can I take that as a yes, or?” Matt chuckles, a deep red blush speckling his fair complexion as you carefully place your body weight on his lap.
“Yes,” you hum, pulling his bottom lip between your teeth before moving back in and slipping your tongue in his mouth like he did to you earlier.
“Mm, angel,” he murmurs against your lips, and you feel something begin to press against your thigh, Matt’s strong hands moving up your waist as his thumbs brush the sides of your breasts. Your heart swells with excitement and your face flushes with heat, a tingly buzz in your lower abdomen. If you thought Matt was intoxicating just by sitting at his desk doing legal work, you are simply drunk on him with his body below you like this.
“How about we test my stamina?” you sigh between kisses.
Matt smiles brightly and kisses you with urgency, understanding that tonight will probably go longer than he initially anticipated. Even in your desire to do something so sinful, you still remain so pure.
And you’re all his.
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The real life inspirations behind new characters in Touhou 19 (Unfinished Dream of All Living Ghost)
While I haven’t been posting much about Touhou as of late, I felt obliged to put together the customary post about the inspirations behind the new characters. The new game genuinely renewed my interest. In contrast with similar write-ups pertaining to previous games the research is not entirely mine - some of the sections are a result of cooperation between me and @just9art.
Without further ado, let’s delve into the secrets of the new cast. Find out if Biten is the first “Wukong impersonator” ever, when a tanuki is actually a badger, and why Hisami both is and isn’t an oni. Naturally, the post is full of spoilers. Also, fair warning, it's long.
1. Biten Son - sarugami + Sun Wukong
Sarugami means “monkey kami”, the monkey in mention being the Japanese macaque.To my best knowledge, the term is actually not used commonly in English - the results on jstor and De Gruyter are in the low single digits, Brill outright has nothing to offer. Translations are much more common.
Sarugami are particularly strongly associated with Mount Hiei. You might have heard of it because of its association with Matarajin, though in this case he’s not exactly relevant. Instead, it is believed the monkeys act as messengers of Sanno (the “mountain king”), Sekizan Myojin and Juzenji. Sanno himself could take the form of a monkey according to medieval texts, while Juzenji can be accompanied by a deity depicted as a man with a monkey’s head, Daigyoji, known from the Hie mandala. Sarutahiko is also associated with monkeys based on the similarity between his name and the word saru.
Bernard Faure notes that despite the clearly positive portrayal of monkeys as semi-divine beings in service of these deities, their perception in folklore and mythology can nonetheless be considered ambivalent, because they could be viewed as aggressive. There are even examples of sarugami being portrayed as monstrous antagonists to be defeated by a hero. The best known tale of this variety is known simply as Sarugami taiji. It is preserved in the Konjaku monogatari. Here the sarugami is a fearsome monster who terrorizes a village and demands the offering of one young woman each year.
In contrast with the sarugami, I do not think Sun Wukong, one of the protagonists of the classic Chinese novel Journey to the West, needs much of an introduction. We reached the point where even in the west he is recognizable enough to warrant toys based on him (there’s a Lego Wukong on my desk right now). Biten's design has many callbacks to traditional portrayals of Wukong, including the staff (which in the novel is a pillar stolen from the undersea palace of a dragon emperor) and a very distinctive diadem (in the novel making it possible to pressure the unruly Wukong into obeying the monk he is meant to protect).
As a curiosity it’s worth noting that “fake Wukong” is not a brand new idea - in the novel itself, one of the enemies of the heroes, Six-Eared Macaque, actually impersonates him for a time.
Wukong is effectively himself a “divine monkey”, seeing as despite his origin as a literary character he actually came to be worshiped as a deity in mainland China, Taiwan and various areas with a large Chinese diaspora. The topic of Wukong worship itself came to be an inspiration for literature, starting with the excellent The Great Sage, Heaven’s Equal by Pu Songling, a writer active during the reign of the Qing dynasty, in the early eighteenth century.
2. Enoko Mitsugashira - “immortal yamainu” + Cerberus
Enoko gets the least coverage here, because there really isn’t much to say. Yamainu, “mountain dog”, isn’t really a supernatural creature, it’s an old term for either the extinct Japanese wolf, a type of feral dog, or a hybrid between these. It can also be used as a synonym of okuri-inu, a youkai wolf believed to accompany travelers at night.
There’s actually a distinctly Journey to the West-esque component to Enoko’s backstory, but I have no clue if this is intentional. In the aforementioned novel, many of the antagonists, who are generally demonic animals, are motivated by the desire to devour the flesh of the protagonist, the Buddhist monk Tang Sanzang, because it is said to grant immortality. Granted, given the obscurity of the figure Zanmu is based on - more on that later - perhaps this is an allusion to something else we have yet to uncover.
Cerberus, being probably one of the most famous mythical monsters in the world, does not really need to be discussed here. The illustration is included mostly because I like Edmund Dulac and any opportunity is suitable for sharing his illustrations. I do not think it needs to be pointed out that Enoko's bear trap weapons are meant to evoke Cerberus' extra heads.
3. Chiyari Tenkajin - tenkaijin (+ mujina) + chupacabra
While my favorite animal youkai not yet featured in Touhou is easily the kawauso (otter), I was very pleased to learn we sort of got a mujina since I wanted to cover this topic since forever, but never got much of a chance. Technically Chiyari is actually meant to be a tenkaijin, which is not a mujina but a slightly different youkai (a will-o-wisp or St. Elmo’s fire-like creature, specifically) who in the single tale dealing with it takes the form of a mujina after dying, but as there is not much to say about it beyond that you will get a crash course in mujina folklore instead.
Today the word mujina is pretty firmly a synonym of anaguma - in other words, the Japanese badger. The animal does not substantially differ from other badgers, so I do not think much needs to be said about its ecology. However, historically the term could be used to refer to the tanuki regionally, or interchangeably to both animals, so in some cases if insufficient detail is provided it is hard to tell which one is meant.
This ambiguity extends to the folklore surrounding them, and generally if you know what to expect from tanuki tales, which I’m sure most people reading this do, you will instantly recognize many of the plot elements typical for mujina ones. In other words, it is yet another yokai which typically takes the role of a shapeshifting trickster. Some supernatural phenomena could be basically interchangeably attributed to mujina, tanuki, kitsune or kawauso. Mujina are commonly described taking the form of Buddhist monks, which is one of the many similarities between them and tanuki.
The most famous depiction of a shapeshifting mujina comes from Toriyama Sekien’s Konjaku Gazu Zoku Hyakki (The Illustrated One Hundred Demons from the Present and the Past). The accompanying text compares the creature to the supernatural versions of kitsune and tanuki, and states that the artist relied on a tale according to which a mujina was able to successfully impersonate a Buddhist monk until accidentally revealing its tail.
What makes the mujina special is that it is actually the oldest recorded example of a youkai of this sort. A mujina tale already appears in the early Japanese chronicle Nihon Shoki, dated to 627. It reports an incident of a mujina transforming into a human and singing somewhere in the Michinoku Province. I feel like this alone is a good example of why you should be wary of people who seek to present Nihon Shoki or Kojiki as historical truth.
Western audiences as far as I know were first introduced to mujina by Lafcadio Hearn. To my best knowledge, the fabulous shapeshifting badgers however failed to gain the popcultural recognition enjoyed by tanuki and kitsune. They did appear in Shigeru Mizuki's stories every now and then, and I found a mascot character based on them, but overall there isn't all that much beyond that.
Naturally, there isn't much mujina in Chiyari's design, and she instead most likely owes her distinctly spiky appearance to the other inspiration behind her character, the chupacabra. Mujina are not really portrayed as bloodthirsty, but the poorly documented tenkajin apparently is, which is presumably why ZUN decided to connect Chiyari with the chupacabra, the best known modern blood-drinking creature, who first appeared in tall tales from 1995 and subsequently took popculture by storm after spreading from Puerto Rico to mainland USA and Mexico. I am not a chupacabra aficionado so I have little to offer here, sadly.
4. Hisami Yomotsu - yomotsu-shikome
Judging from what I’ve seen on social media and on pixiv, Hisami is shaping up to be one of the most popular new characters (she’s my fave too). In sharp contrast with that, her basis is pretty obscure. So obscure that there isn’t even any historical art to showcase, as far as I can tell (note that this blog claims night parade scrolls might have something to offer, though - I was unable to verify this claim for now, sadly). As we learn from her bio, she is supposed to be a yomotsu-shikome. They’re called the “hags of Yomi” of Yomi in Donald L. Philippi’s Kojiki translation. The term shikome can be literally translated as “ugly woman”. Nothing about them really implies femme fatale leanings we are evidently seeing in Touhou but I’m not going to complain about that.
Yomotsu-shikome appear only in the Kojiki and the Nihon Shoki, and in both of these early chronicles they are portrayed as servants of Izanami after she died and came to reside in Yomi, the land of the dead. Nihon Shoki states there are only eight of them.
The distinct grape vine motif present on Hisami’s clothes seems like an obvious reference to Izanagi’s escape from Yomi following his meeting with Izanami, portrayed in the myth recorded in both of these sources. When the yomotsu-shikome started to pursue him, he threw a vine he used to hold his hair at them. The plant instantly bore fruit, which the entities started to eat. They later resumed the chase, but were once again held back, this time by a bamboo shot. According to the Nihon Shoki, they eventually give up after he creates a river from his piss (sic) to keep them away.
Yomotsu-shikome are sometimes compared to oni by modern researchers. Noriko T. Reider in her monograph about oni argues that alongside hashihime and yamanba (pictured above) they can be effectively grouped with them. Another researcher, Michael D. Foster, is more cautious, and states that despite clear similarities it’s best to avoid conflating oni-like female demons with female oni proper, especially since the latter have a distinct iconography and a distinct set of traits. Norinaga Motoori, the founder of kokugaku or “national learning”, a nationalist intellectual movement in Edo and Meiji period Japan, claimed that oni were based on yomotsu-shikome, which is a pretty dubious claim. It is ultimately not certain when the term oni started to be used, but it is safe to say it has continental origin. And, of course, oni permeate Japanese culture in a way yomotsu-shikome do not.
5. Zanmu Nippaku - Zanmu
This was the toughest mystery to solve, and I am fully indebted to 9 here, since they figured it out, I am merely depending on what they directed me to. Research is still ongoing, and it feels like we just started to untangle this mystery, so you can safely expect further updates.
Zanmu appears to be based on the Buddhist monk… well, Zanmu. You can learn a bit about him here or on Japanese wikipedia; it seems there are quite literally 0 sources pertaining to him in English, and even in Japanese there is actually very little. Their names are not written the same, ZUN swapped the sign for “dream” from the original name for one which can be read as “nothingness”. If the unsourced quote on wikipedia is genuine, the reason might be tied to the personal views of the irl Zanmu. What little we’ve been able to gather about him is that he was active in the Sengoku period, and apparently was regarded as unorthodox and eccentric. This lines up with Zanmu’s omake bio pretty well. Seems the real Zanmu was also unusually long lived, and was able to recall events from distant past in great detail, though obviously the figure of 139 years attributed to him in a few places online has to be an exaggeration.
Yet more puzzling is the reference to Zanmu’s familiarity with Ikkyo you might spot in the linked article. Whether the famous Ikkyo who you may know from the tale of Jigoku Dayu is meant is difficult to determine. The chronology does not really add up; on the other hand the logic behind associating one eccentric semi-legendary monk with another in later legends isn’t particularly convoluted. As 9 pointed out to me, if ZUN was aware of this link, and the same Ikkyo really was meant, it is not impossible the connection between Zanmu and Hisami is meant to in some way mirror that between Ikkyo and Jigoku Dayu.
As you can easily notice, it’s pretty clear the historical Zanmu was male. It does not seem his Touhou counterpart is, obviously. I would say we should wait for more info until declaring that we have a second Miko situation on our hands, with a male historical figure directly reimagined as a female character without any indication we are dealing with a relative rather than the real deal. There’s still relatively little info to go by so I would remain cautious (though naturally this is not meant to discourage you from having headcanons).
Neither me nor 9 were able to find any connection between the historical Zanmu and oni… so far, at least. Therefore, what motivated ZUN to make Zanmu an oni remains to be discovered.
As a final curiosity, on a semi-related note it might be worth pointing out that while not as common as their male peers, female oni are not a modern invention, and already appear in setsuwa from the 13th century. A particularly common motif are tales describing a woman turning into oni due to jealousy or anger.
Further reading:
Jason Colavito, The Secret Prehistory of El Chupacabra (2011)
Bernard Faure, Gods of Medieval Japan vol. 1-3 (2015-2022)
Michael Daniel Foster, The Book of Yokai. Mysterious Creatures of Japanese Folklore (2015)
John Knight, Waiting for Wolves in Japan. An Anthropological Study of People-wildlife Relations (2003)
Noriko T. Reider, Japanese Demon Lore (2010)
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PICK-A-CARD 🪼ೕ single since birth · your first partner (suggested by anon)
in today’s pac we will be answering the following questions regarding your first relationship:
- how will you meet this person?
- what will your first impression of each other be?
- what will your relationship be like?
- physical attributes and other identifying factors.
reminder that this is a general reading and messages found here may not apply to everyone. take what resonates, leave what doesn't, and don't force anything if it does not fit.
BOOK A READING WITH ME · LINKTREE · SUGGEST A PAC TOPIC · TIPS ♡ tips and feedback are highly appreciated!
GROUP ONE
cards pulled: justice (reversed), eight of pentacles, eight of pentacles (reversed), eight of cups (reversed), four of wands (reversed), seven of pentacles (reversed), nine of pentacles, seven of swords, king of wands (reversed).
channelled songs: let me down slowly by alec benjamin. not mine by day6. wake up by bahja rodriguez. amusement park by baekhyun.
my dear group one ♡ you and this person may meet in an environment that is strict, with a lot of rules and regulations. this, of course, pertains to academic and professional settings, like a class or office place. but i am also getting that you may meet while playing a game (physical, not a video game) or at an adventure park that you may visit with friends, or friends and friends of friends. this meeting will be quite coincidental, and will make you both feel as if it is thanks to fate that your paths crossed. interestingly enough—and only for some of you—you may part ways for some time and reunite a few months or even years later. this may, then, be someone you have already met and parted ways with.
the first impression that you and your first partner have of each other is that you’re equally as inept when it comes to interpersonal relationships—and not just with regard to love and romantic relationships. your first conversations may be awkward, with your person often stumbling over their words and saying things they later regret because of how overwhelmed and intimidated they feel in the moment. this won’t be anything bad per se, rather them telling stupid jokes, sharing random facts, or going on long spiels about their interests, in ways that you might enjoy or find endearing but that make them slap their head and ask “why did i say that??” as soon as they’re alone. you may start off thinking of this person as someone who is intelligent yet otherwise mediocre while your first partner’s first impression of you may be that you are somewhat of an insecure person who doesn’t see their own attractiveness.
in this relationship, your person may be doing most of the work. they may reach out first, ask you out first, and take most of the control, but i feel as if it is done willingly because they have more romantic experience than you. kind of like, showing you the ropes. but it’s also as if they want to spoil you as much as possible because of how long they had been waiting to be in this relationship with you; because of how long they had been waiting to have you as their partner. this relationship may also be one in which you feel comfortable enough to explore your sexuality, especially in a way you haven’t been able to in the past because of your single status. though, of course, it comes with its own hardships. you may be closed off and aloof because of how unfamiliar romantic relationships are for you, often pushing your partner to the limits of their patience.
this person may have prominent cancer, aquarius, and/or virgo placements. they may be south asian, southeast asian (of south asian or southeast asian descent) with light to dark brown skin even if they are of a different race or ethnicity. they may have an emotionless look about them—kind of like a “resting bitch face”, with any sternness dissipating the moment that they smile. this person may also be energetic and physically fit; they may like to exercise and spend time outdoors, in particular, they may enjoy hiking, canoeing, and rowing. they also give off an effortlessly confident energy, as if they know who they are and what they stand for and, thus, could not be bothered by anyone else’s opinions of them.
GROUP TWO
cards pulled: eight of swords (reversed), nine of wands, justice (reversed), the hanged man, seven of cups (reversed), knight of wands, nine of wands, the hermit, six of cups (reversed).
channelled songs: you give good love by whitney houston. million dollar man by lana del rey. why didn’t you stop me? by mitski. u by baekhyun.
my dear group two ♡ you and this person may meet in a medical or stressful environment. for some, you may meet in the waiting area of a hospital or airport. this will be stressful either because someone is in labour or because a flight has been delayed (likely due to weather). you may end up chatting with this person to pass the time, and because i feel that they are more extroverted than you it may be them who starts the conversation.
your first impression of this person will likely be more a distant observation that they seem frantic and full of panicked energy. you will likely notice them pacing across the room, on the phone as they try to explain their situation to someone or try to close a business deal despite how hectic everything around them is. you may be fully absorbed in a book until they grab your attention with their movements and the hushed sound of their hurried conversation, yet once they do grab your attention it’s hard to take your eyes off them. you’ll probably keep peeking at them out of curiosity, occasionally accidentally making and breaking eye contact until they finish and eventually sit down beside you. their first impression of you may be that you're the complete opposite of them, in attitude and in appearance. you are likely more down-to-earth, humble and introverted… i’m not too familiar with bridget jones as a character but i’m also being urged to say that you’re likely more of a “bridget jones type” (maybe more physically than in personality, for some). or at least that is their first impression of you. they may initially see you as an intellectual and calm person, as someone with whom they can have a nice, distracting conversation. they will be drawn to you because, in that moment, they need a bit of the calm that you exude.
your relationship may be one that causes you a certain amount of stress. your first partner is likely someone who is fairly busy, business-oriented, and wealthy. they prioritise work and their image, because in their line of work image is what gets them the furthest. because of this, they may push you to change the way you dress or get you to join them in the gym or in participating in physically exhaustive activities. this person will push you to grow in many ways, and while you may learn new things about yourself in this relationship, and get new opportunities through this relationship, it may come to a point where it overwhelms and stresses you out more than anything. like i said, this person is very focused on their image, they are incredibly appearance-focused, in such a way that might do nothing more than make you self-conscious and insecure at every moment. your partner may also spend a lot of time travelling for work and, as they are quite attractive and outgoing, you may find yourself growing anxious that they will cheat on you while they’re away from you.
in this relationship, and as your anxiety grows, you may find yourself doing things and agreeing to things out of a fear that if you do not you will lose your person—such as dyeing your hair, getting surgery or dental work, losing/gaining weight, and/or moving somewhere to be closer to them.
your first partner may be someone who is quite a bit older than you. i’m getting the words “father figure” so they might be 40-50+ and have children—even if they are younger than this, they may still have children or a child. they may have prominent sagittarius and/or pisces placements, and are likely of greek, italian, or south asian descent. physically, they may be lean and taller than you. sometimes you may look at them and think about how they could have been a model, and actually could still be a model if they decided to go that route. they also likely look younger than they actually are, or they carry themselves in such a way that subverts your expectations of age and what it actually means to grow older. professionally, they may be a lawyer or senior executive who is now making a change in their career, such as starting a business of their own or going into a more artsy career, such as film direction.
GROUP THREE
cards pulled: five of cups, nine of pentacles, eight of cups, six of cups (reversed), ten of wands (reversed), two of swords (reversed), nine of wands (reversed), ten of wands, the tower, eight of cups (reversed), the moon, four of wands (reversed), four of pentacles.
channelled songs: first to last by danger incorporated. no choir by florence + the machine. nobody by miraa may. un village by baekhyun.
my dear group three ♡ you may meet at a particularly bad time in both of your lives, or at a place that brings back more ‘bad’, stressful, and embarrassing memories than anything else, such as at a college or university. or in the aftermath of graduating from college or university, or in the aftermath of leaving a stressful job. for some, you may meet at a club, gathering, or after a night out that leaves you moody and hungover. meeting them may make you feel hopeful about life again; as if all your stresses are manageable because this person is in your life.
your first impression of this person may be a fleeting one. you probably see them around town, or notice them as they pass you by without thinking too much, only to have a “hey! i think i know you!” moment when you actually meet for the first time. you may think of them as someone who is busy and motivated, but also closed-off and in their own little world. likely because they are always rushing around, and don’t divulge more than they actually need to in any given situation. you may also think of them as intimidating because they are so much more mature and put together than you are—or, at least, that is how you see them from your first impression of them.
the messages for this group are kind of hard to get out, as if your first impressions of each other are far too flimsy and ephemeral…
when it comes to your first partner’s first impression of you, it is likely that they see you as someone who is overworked and overburdened. they may see you in a place of transit, such as an airport or bus station, and think that you must be so overwhelmed with the amount of bags you are carrying. their first impression of you might not be all too pleasant, maybe thinking of you as dishevelled or not well put together because when they first see you it is at a particularly ill-opportune time, only for this impression to change when you actually meet for the first time. they may initially think of you as an argumentative person who picks fights, judges others over their perceived flaws, and gossips needlessly. they may initially think of you as unintellectual and, to some extent, below them or just not their type.
this may not only be your first relationship, but also your first love and the first time you’ve felt so strongly about another person. you may have had crushes in the past, but these are nothing in comparison to the depth of what you feel for your first partner, to the extent that it might actually shock you and leave you questioning what exactly these feelings are. it is likely that you will end up marrying this person, but the more serious this relationship becomes the more you may find yourself disengaging and pushing your person away. the moment it clicks for you that this may be permanent and not just a fleeting or casual relationship, may be the very moment you start to subconsciously self-sabotage.
this relationship will push you to face your own hang-ups and beliefs about relationships, love, and marriage. it will also push you to be more mature in that you will have to voice your upsets and disagreements, make compromises, and be brave instead of running away when times get tough. this relationship will change you into a better person, in many ways. it is a relationship that will help you to reach your full potential, both in your romantic and professional life. especially in your professional life, as this person will ensure that you follow your dreams and take risks in your career you may be too scared to take. this person may come from a strict background, or a background where they felt they were never loved or supported enough, and that is why they are so vocal in their love and support of you. they are purposeful to not replicate those same patterns in your relationship—most of all because they want to have children with you, want to be the best possible parent, and want to create a loving family and home.
when it comes to your person’s appearance, they may be a bit insecure about what they look like–at least in some way. despite this, they still look after their appearance and make sure they look neat and representable. they likely have long, thick hair and/or a well-kept beard and crooked or discoloured teeth. they likely have clear, glowy, brown or sunkissed skin or a glow about them that gives them a calm, happy look. they may also be buddhist, or someone who considers themselves more spiritual than religious. for some, i’m getting that they’re someone who finds god in nature and in everything all around them. they’re also a huge nature and animal lover! professionally, there’s a fun little mix of careers here... for some, this person may be a bit of a transient, enjoying life instead of jumping into a career. they might be a surfer who works on the beach or by the seaside, taking any job that comes their way. in other cases, they may be a student or someone who is more concerned with academia and their education than with a job. they may also plan to be a teacher or divorce lawyer, if they are not already one.
GROUP FOUR
cards pulled: eight of wands (reversed), ten of cups, ten of wands, eight of cups (reversed), five of cups, seven of pentacles, strength, ace of swords, ace of cups (reversed), king of wands (reversed), strength.
channelled songs: river by maya b. cozy by beyoncé. priority by ré lxuise. dreamer by nct 127.
my dear group four ♡ before i even started to pull your cards the word “malayalam” came to mind, so you may meet this person in kerala, india, or in a language or cultural exchange group. this may also just be a language either you or both of you speak! you and this person may meet in an environment that you are wholly familiar and comfortable with; in your city where you often travel, at a class, or at a wedding. the movie comrades: almost a love story actually also comes to mind, so you might meet this person as they look for new connections, friends, and other resources in a city with which they are entirely unfamiliar. you may speak a bit of their language, at least enough to communicate what’s necessary, and may also be able to help them learn the language of your new city.
your first impression of this person will kind of be that they’re a lost puppy, all shy and confused and much like you when you were first learning to stand on your own two feet. you may feel a responsibility over them and want to look after them, or at least help them settle in because of how alone and without support they seem to be. i also get the feeling that they aren’t dressed appropriately for the city’s weather—for example, they may be wearing a turtleneck and a coat because the winter they’re used to is not at all like the winter in this city. with all this combined, it might be more apt to say that your first impression of your first partner is one of pity and sympathy. you may have both moved to this city, or you may have similar experience with being out of your comfort zone and eventually settling in, which makes this person almost instantly feel safe around you. as this is a first impression, you may not even have to say anything, but they may instinctively know that you and they are the same in some way. they may also admire you from the very first meeting. you’ve managed to build a life for yourself in a way they can only wish to.
it's interesting that we have strength and the ace of swords for what your relationship will be like, so you and this person are likely both equally determined, hard-headed or, for lack of another word, dominant. while at first you may think of this person as defenceless, the more comfortable you become with each other and the more comfortable they become in their surroundings, the more you’ll start to see that they are anything but. and that’s not to say that they are violent or anything bad like that, but rather that you may be so similar that you often challenge each other and get on each other’s nerves. you both are heavily focused on your own goals and, so, without even really needing to discuss it or worry about it, you may both come to the agreement that the relationship comes second and your own personal careers and achievements come first. it’s likely that this relationship is a short-term one. you both provide each other with exactly what you need in this period of your lives (comfort, companionship, understanding) but will outgrow each other once this has passed.
this person may have prominent water or fire placements. they either have very pale or very dark skin. whatever facial features they have are kind of turned up to a 100, for example they could be a white european with bright blue eyes and thin, blond hair or an indian with dark skin, a hooked nose and thick hair, or a black american with dark skin, a wide nose, and big lips (etc). it might be most succinct to say that they have pronounced features or a “stereotypical” appearance—especially one that stands out in the city that they have moved to. and this doesn’t go for race and ethnicity alone, but for gender too and the way that they express their gender—for example, if they are a stud or a butch lesbian they are very stereotypical in how they dress and carry themselves.
and that’s not to say it’s a bad thing, obviously! it’s just an observation. in the case of gender, in particular, it may even be a dolly parton/bruce springsteen situation, where they play into gender stereotypes and use gender as a performance. professionally, this person is incredibly skilled, talented and educated, but may be unemployed when you meet them.
#**#tarot#pac#pick a card#pick a group#pick an image#pick a pile#pick a picture#tarotonline#tarotblr#tarotcommunity#channelled message#channeled message#love reading#tarot reading#tarot readings#future partner#love tarot reading#love tarot
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